#and i don't feel like doing that rn lmao
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Working on a pride drawing :]
#wip#i'm actually gonna do three#this one with my fursonas#another with the eterna guardian trio + the little traveler#and one with my sonic ocs. probably all of them in one#so that one will be the biggest since there's so many lmao#i'm starting with my fursonas tho bc i rlly wanted to draw them#i put clothes on these beasts#isa's outfit is literally one i own i just need to get the specific sonic art that's on the shirt#and i don't feel like doing that rn lmao#they have the aroace flag painted on their face#and nina's dress is gonna have the genderqueer flag colors#my fluffy queer babies. i love them
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my second born son <333
taking suggestions for who to make next!!
#isn't his little face so cute oh my god#figured out how to do hair! or at least. short hair and updos.#it involves sticking a bunch of pins in the poor baby's head though 😭😭 it feels like I'm torturing them LMAO#I AM going to make garak at some point but I don't think I could bear to part w him and rn I want to make ones for the craft swap lmao#I'm gonna give him the same outfit I cosplayed with all the little details and everything 😭😭#anyways. vry happy w little spock. I love him dearly#narcissus's echoes#narcissus plays dress up#star trek#spock#star trek tos#star trek the original series#s'chn t'gai spock
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promise rings
#this is part of my md fanseries btw#there's more but it's a lot of context and stuff and I don't rlly feel like doing all that rn LMAO#murder drones#murder drones uzi#murder drones n#md nuzi#dl art
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thank you everybody who crossed their fingers and toes bc aventurine AND acheron are now both safely at home:3333333333
#the amount of tickets i went through?#let's not talk abt that#i also got six sampo's#and like eight (??) pela's#(i was about to fucking kill somebody i don'T EVEN USE HERRRR LEAVE ME ALONEEEEEEEEEEEEE LITTLE LADY)#and then tingyun and hanya and yukong (2x)#and gepard#who is cute but at the moment i was not that happy bc he was standing between me and my wife😠😠😠😠#i feel like i'm forgetting someone lmao#anyway#acheron was playing hard to get i do feel just a bit sad bc i am so low on tickets now and i kinda wanted her lc too#and idk whether i should still try to get it or not............................#my brother pulled her for me btw😭😭😭#i was losing hope but then he came into my room to talk abt his day and i was like okok . i need you to just push this button for me#AND IT ONLY TOOK TWOOOOO PULLS#😭😭😭😭😭😭#everybody say thank you mickey's little brother we love you mickey's little brother#i can't even use her rn though bc i can't get a good relic set for her lmao#I CAN USE AVENTURINE THOUUUGHHH AND HE'S SOO SOO GOOD EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE I LOVE ITTTT#mmmm i should probably level up tingyun too right i've heard that she's good#i'm facing another very difficult decision now though bc................. i love jy...........................#but how many lightning charas do i need...................... if firefly is really getting a rerun at the same time........................#i might....................................... prioritize her.....................................#I HATE ITTTTT:(((((((((((((((#BUT I WANT JY TOOOO:(((((((((((((((((((#genuinely feels like i'm betraying him wahhhhhhhhh#anyway i'm in (what i hope) are my period feelings so hhhhhhhhhh#dying over and over again but dw i'll be back on my regular bs soon:333333#mayor of loserville
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#tw vent? ig?#jfc#just almost got into a physical fight with a stranger on the street 👍#i only made a tsk sound bc some dumb was loud as hell and i was already on the verge of crying#but she immediately told me to stop shushing her kid but i didn't even mean that#I told her to calm her kid down but that was enough for her to start saying shit like “don't shush MY kid” or “c'mon and let's fight!”#like bitch wtf#walking away from her was the smartest choice lol#but on the other hand my bpd-bipolar ass started quietly splitting so i do not feel good rn lmao#but I'll be ok i just need to focus on playing DAI lol#i hate any fights i just want peace and quiet sjjdjand#rambles#actually bpd#actually bipolar
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I'm back! (for the most part)
Hello, hope everyone is doing alright, needed a few more days than I expected. BUT, here now and slowly working on being more active. May take me a bit but plan to get caught up with everything and the likes. Going to release promptobers throughout the next couple of days, along with anything else I'm currently working on. Expect some updates on the oneshot, ch. 35 and so on as well ^-^ Thank you all for your paitence and hope to be back to regularly posting soon!
some medical/mental stuff below the cut if you're curious, I was going to save this for the ch. 35 note, but figured I might as well just say it now as it's part of the reason my return was delayed
SO, haven't really spoken on it but I've had a sinus infection for about two months now and gonna be so fr with you all, it's sucked. Like, i've never had one this bad before and it just totally knocked me on my ass. I've been tired, dazed/brain fog, some bad headaches/face pain, all the really fun stuff. I made the joke that I spent like two days of being 23 healthy and the rest of the time I've been sick lmao
But anyway, I kept waiting to see if it would clear up on it's own (and for like a week or so there my health insurance was messed up so there was that to deal with) and it just, didn't. And with everything going on with research (esp this past week) I just made myself tough through it hoping it would get better, and it didn't. So, finally went to the doctor and got on some meds and I'm feeling a LOT better.
The point to all this is to say, I've had no motivation to write beyond very small bursts and thus why I've been putting out promptobers but not the latest chapter of CS. My energy has just been super low, and I had a lot of brain fog for several weeks and I just, couldn't bring myself to do it. Maybe it was a little bit of writer's block from stress too, not super sure
I took the break mainly bc things with research just got, really shitty for a few days there and I just needed time away from everything for bit esp with the sickness issues. Thankfully, things are working out a bit better this week people-wise and hopefully we'll continue to go up from here.
As for why I was gone the few extra days, the stuff they put me on made me feel physically great, but it also made me feel like doing absolutely nothing for a day or so. But, figured out the timing for those so now it's manageable to get through the next week and hopefully I'll be fully back to normal by then ^_^
TL;DR if you can go to the doctor when you're sick, go. It is NOT worth the discomfort, stress, etc to not. Also, take a break when you're stressed, does wonders for your mental health
well, since you took the time to read all of this, enjoy these pictures of a cat that showed up at my parents place a few days ago. She’s a bengal! Which makes her the second stray that's shown up that is incredibly rare/bred to look like that (the first is Nubs, my idiot who eats everything if any of you recall). Not to worry, she went home to (hopefully) her forever family early yesterday :)
#you don't realize how out of it you are until you're back in it man#like being on autopiliot and then all of the sudden BAM#feeling normal???#and good???#having coherent thoughts???#wild#not to mention if I can survive my exam tuesday I'll get a bit of my free time back#legit if i haven't been doing school or promptobers i've been aimless#it was the worst~#but now I'm good and i hope I stay good~#im gonna be really sad if I dont~#god the drafts are full rn fr fr#y'all are getting fed after I starved you for a week lmao#void shouting
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he's so pretty
#i wonder who this is about#def not suna that's fs#(it's abt suna)#the only thing getting me thru this nyc trip is thinking abt him#my no. 1 tip is when u feel anxious just think abt ur cc being there w u#works everytime#getting my blood drawn? definitely saw haji/oikawa there w me#real men suck!!!#suna nendoroid please save me#i will buy him all the chuupets#new motivation unlocked#work to get money 2 buy suna chuupets#i've never abbreviated sm in my life i'm so tired but i must profess my love to the world#i don't even know how i end up in the tags it's like i'm hiding from the my actual post on the tag screen yk LMAO#i love suna#the longest contract was so cute omg#ALSO LMK SAY THIS HERE 😭😭 PROBABLY LIKE 3 PEOPLE SAID NO TO A WRITING PROMPT EVEN WHICH IS SUCH A MINORITY#but my head really goes “well then i guess no one would care u should not do a prompt event”#no i'm def going to i'm already thinking out prompts LMAOO#spilling out all my thoughts rn#ALSO IT'S OK TO SAY NO I JUST OVERTHINK EVERYTHING I TOTALLY GET IT#ness' brainvomit <3
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I think I'm still. slightly in shock that the anniversary announcement was actually two-related tbh??
like obviously the 50th had a bunch of new two content with enemy of the world and (most of!) the web of fear being found, we had the tales from the tardis short, lots of little references over the years. but on the other hand with so many episodes missing/a relative lack of big finish content compared to the later classic who doctors/new novels for classic who doctors sort of having vanished, I do sometimes feel like this era gets a bit. passed over. as if it's too hard to engage people with the original content because it's black-and-white/missing/wobbly sets and effects or whatever the reasoning is, so we'll focus on the more marketable stuff instead.
so to actually have the big Thing for the anniversary be two-related without the coincidence of episodes being found (tho I would still love that, all episodes of the highlanders recovered immediately please and thank you) is just. ??????. !!!!!!.
#second doctor#idk i mighttttt be biased bc i do not care about the animations at all lmao#and ik that has been a fairly significant source of content for two-era recently. i just don't like them :(#but it's just like!#not the First Era (tho i feel like one gets a little passed over as well. one fans i am holding your hand)#so misses out on that bit of promo#but still just a little bit Too Early#like as rtd says in the media release for this he was 6 when the war games aired#old enough to remember some stuff#but not old enough to actually Properly imprint on it like he evidently did w/ three and four for instance#(which shows in like. everything he did w/ sarah jane for instance)#& i think a lot of the people feeding into official content rn are of similar ages if not younger#idk. does anyone else feel this way about two era#i could be talking nonsense who knows!!!#i am just out here Saying Things
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#i don't think the fic is bad or anything but it fought me more than any story has this year. mostly bc of how i've been feeling?#and i think i could've made it a lot better if i'd shelved it for like two or three months tbh#until i was in the right mindset to try to say what i was trying to say? which is one of the main reasons why i shouldn't do big bangs tbh.#but! it's done. and that's the important thing lmao. and i did say my priority this year is finishing things not making them good#i do feel like. there's? some pressure? well-meaning and incredibly kind to be clear! but i do.#but i feel like i have. expectations? on me? and i'm not sure this is going to live up to them?#which is. like i think the story turned out fine but i feel like ppl expect more than fine? from me?#which!!! sounds conceited!!! i am aware!!! but i don't mean it in conceited i mean it like. i'm /stressed/ lmao.#like i think i'd be more okay with failing to meet my own expectations if ppl were okay w/ expecting less from me?#this is a mess.#i just wish i could be proud that i got it finished and instead didn't feel like i was going to let ppl down who expected more?#anyway. i've been working on my internal expectations this year. and i think next year has GOTTA be about external expectations lmao.#like it's absolutely no one's fault it's my own bad brain and you're absolutely not responsible for my feelings!! it's just.#anyway. i'm going to focus on being proud of myself for finishing it because it was very very very hard for me to do that#so it's done! and that's exciting!#and that's gotta be the most important thing for me rn lmao#stretching that writing muscle tag
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also picking raspberries turned out to be.. really fucking hard
#it's so physically demanding broo ToT#idk i feel like im just weak af because some people there seem to do it so easily and i can barely#do half a day#and they want me to do a full day tomorrow bro#like#I'm so tired after half a day..#i genuinely feel like i might just collapse or something#i do want that bit of money tho but it's sooo exhausting#i went there for half a day today and it killed me bro i was just lying in bed#and i didn't want to fall asleep cause it was like noon already but#i didn't even have the energy to look at a phone lmao#well it's gonna be over this week probably cause#the raspberries are going to stop growing in a few days apparently they're saying in 2 days#we're going to be done#I'd love to make more money but I don't think i can fucking do ittt#its so physically demanding whyyyyy#and why are there grandmas working with me in that field and they seem just fine BROOOO TOT#but yeah now that im thinking about it this also might be part of my problems cause#im soo much.ore irritable rn just cause im literally exhausted all the time ughhh#i came back home 3 days ago and i haven't even had the time to sit down at a desk and draw something#not even mentioning energy aughhh
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given the changes to the policies on that dying bird website (formerly twitter), especially on the ones concerning AI, do you plan on uploading your content there still? or do you intend to keep that as your most active platform? if not, which is the one to best follow your work?
(also thank you for your sherliam art!)
hi! though it's a bit sad seeing a lot of ppl leaving and going private or deleting their accounts, i still intend to be active there. i recently started to use bluesky more (or at least trying to), but i still can't completely leave twitter yet. my one reason is there are a lot of accounts that still only post there. lmao. like musicians or voice actors that i keep up with, official anime/manga accounts, and most importantly our God Herself Miyoshi Sensei is also there so 🤷♀️ (also i don't really like reposting people's posts from/to other platforms on a regular basis and would rather interact with the original post on the platform where it's posted)
tldr: i'll still be active on twitter!
you can also follow me on bluesky, but updates are a bit slow there cause i'm still trying to figure out how to go about posting my art esp the old ones. using multiple platforms is tiring, i'm old lol
(thank you for liking my art!💗)
#sucks being an artist on social media nowadays#especially artists who make illustrations cause they're the ones getting their arts stolen and fed to ai machines#i mostly make comics so rn i'm still kinda :/ eh i'm fine (for now) ig#i hope this doesn't sound like i'm making light of the situation lmao it's just how i view it Personally#(also i'm doing art just as hobby so obvi i feel different from artists who are for example financially affected by this bc it's their job)#i hate a lot of things about the current twitter i just don't hate it enough to abandon it completely#yeah i have no other reason than most official accounts still being there#maybe another reason is cause i've been there since 2011. i grew up there. that's literally my house.#ask
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#not my place to say because i have no clue what's happening and don't involve myself in any of this but like.#it really does make the fandom experience worse when the only thing people are absorbed in is drama.#i feel very isolated from everyone rn and it's making it very hard to be online#no matter where you stand it's isolating and it sucks. feels like everyone is bonding over gossip that i truly Do Not Care About#and i'm just. sadtoad.jpeg#(not that i don't care about my friends getting bullied or anything!!!)#(this isn't even a vague this is about fandom issues that have Always Existed)#(it just feels like i stay in my lane and anytime i veer out of it i'm bombarded with crazy bullshit LOL)#i miss my friends and my rp partners and i just asfdajdgfasvjd i'm having a hard time being here rn#anyway if you made it to the end of this vent this is all to say: SORRY I'M NOT WRITING AND SORRY I'M NOT ON DISCORD LMAO#tua s4 ruined my life and now i'm trying to get away from vagueposts and bullshit and i just. I CAN'T FUCKING TAKE IT i'm sorry#*【 ❛I'm not the spirit of any age. ❜ 】 ➤ OOC
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not afraid of oc posting anymore <3 (person who is still afraid of oc posting </3)
#i'm like oh no what if ppl i don't know don't like the random guy who exists only in my head. ahhhh#wish i didn't care so much bc other ppl don't but unfortunately i am too self aware and i DO care. very much#me saying this like i wasn't ranking his names last night & posting shirtless pics of him lmao#.......... and then i logged out of tumblr and went to sleep out of sheer embarrassment of talking on him on his blog#normally i don't feel weird talking ab ocs other than eldon bc i love him so much it feels odd sharing him ig#but new guy has given me the brainrot and now i feel annoying about him too. can't win i fear#and when ppl talk to me about him and remember things i mentioned about him i'm like ''oh ppl actually pay attention... huh''#bc i feel annoying. i genuinely want to talk about him forever rn but i think it'd be annoying if i did#can i be normal. can i please be normal. can i stop feeling annoying and stupid over anything i like#then my brain says no and i'm like oh ok </3
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I was about to say that I'm going to feed you guys once a week bc I have a big thing to draw and I still have to not be kicked out of college....
But then I remembered that new life series sooner then I think......
Oh no....
#melousblahblah#im scared#im happy and all but holy shit my life is packed and now i have to also add this thing#bc i won't let it go GUYS I'M AUTISTIC I CAN'T GO BACK#ok silly fact that no one will see#but my therapist said that i don't have adhd or autism#and the same day i cried out of excitement bc i found life series wiki snd thry have all and everything summarised and organised#to be fair#that therapist said that people cant have adhd and autism at the same time and specially cant have depression#imagine lmao#sorry for this little rant#i mean#its my blog so eh its alr ig#if i feel like i need to make a different personal one I'll do it one day#but not today#rn its everything so teehee <3
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i should really learn how to tattoo myself at home huh...
#genius idea#and also a HORRIBLE idea#but i just..#like i don't want to pay a hundred euros just for a four letter tattoo yk?#lmao#before you tell me that's overpriced it's not abt that he just has a mmmmmmmm fuck idk what it's called#like his prices start at hundred#which i think is fair#he just wants to do bigger pieces#and i'm not judging that at all#get that bag#but i just don't have the money to get anything bigger rn#i might try out this other tattoo artist hmm#his style is like veeery very very much what i like#the other guy does more traditional stuff but he's done all of my more “tribal” pieces and he's just like the niiicest guy ever#and i feel very comfortable with him#and reaching out to new tattoo artists is a bit scary lmao#HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I JUST WANT TATTOOOOSSSSS why is everything so hard omfg#mayor of loserville
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Was doing okay holding back all of the fear re: the potential election outcome until literally this second what the fuck to my brain lmao
#wherein lmao means I'm so scared and i cant stop crying rn#no one should have to fear this. not me nor anyone else nor the ppl who have already had to flee their homes worldwide#a person shouldn't have to worry abt violence being enacted upon them bc of who they are which like#obvi isn't a new concept to myself and most ppl but i feel like the folks who'll vote Trmp don't care for it#won't affect them in theory after all so of course they don't care#Housemate and I are trying to figure out where we could go and how in case of the worst#and it's not even the first time I'll have had to leave a place bc of safety reasons (two nickles on that already in my life)#but it doesn't make it any less daunting#i just want to live my life in our little house with Housemate and the cats working my shit job and trying to enjoy whatever i can#none of this matters and im shouting into a void full of equally terrified ppl dealing with this themselves if not worse#these tags don't make sense entirely and i don't care. i have things I should be doing and I'm sitting in my room#paralysed by fear over all of this#i should distract myself but with what? at what point do i accept the distractions can only do so much?#maybe I'll just take a nap again. idk. feels weird and wrong to play a video game or nap ordo anything that isn't trying to research options#i need to stop rambling here like im hoping time will pause while i type im out again lmao
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