#and i didnt even post the last stuff. shameful

[slavhew]

anatoli my beautiful princess with a disorder welcome back

[halforcdad]

i remember begrudgingly getting into ncis: hawaii bc the youtube algorithm would not stop recommending me kate and lucy videos no matter how much i ignored them. i didnt know then that i'd find a pairing and a show that would mean so much to me.

this cancellation is not the first and it won't be the last, but it has left me particularly and extremely heartbroken.

kacy means a lot to me. it's the first ship that's made me feel something in a long time, maybe since high school. ill never forget the genuine excitement, the heartache, the happiness, they made me feel, especially in season 1. ill never forget this show and the ʻOhana i never knew id get so invested in.

i look back in my drafts and i still see posts i never finished about s2 and stuff i had yet to post about s3. i still had so much to say about the show. and they still had so much to give us. its a damn shame that they weren't even given a goodbye season.

was it shitty, corny copaganda at the end of the day? yes. was the writing sometimes rushed and nonsensical? absolutely. did they waste a whole season developing a character that had nothing to do with the core cast? you bet. but the cast and crew didn't deserve such a cruel, untimely cancellation without a chance to say goodbye (especially for shows that include a nasty dude who assaults his costars). the human aspect of it all is painful on its own. the show wasn't perfect at all, but it had heart, it had a good cast and crew, and i know i will miss it terribly.

most of all, i'll miss all the good times i had posting about the show and talking about it with everyone here. it's led me to meet some special people that i'm eternally grateful for and reignited a creative passion in me i haven't felt in a while. I'll always remember kacy and hold them dear in my heart. but I won't be giving up on them any time soon. even after the show ends, ill still be here, going insane over them and all the possibilities we won't get to see. kacy gave me such hope and happiness for the future, and i hope everyone keeps that spark alive.

[gizkasparadise]

final leg of a journey to love thoughts!! (eps 35-40). this got so gd long so under a cut it goes. spoilers, of course:

PLOT STUFF/PACING

pacing for the plot definitely got shredded in the last chunk, which is a damn shame because otherwise i've been finding the pacing pretty much perfect. eps 35-37 in particular felt like they could have been like a 10 episode arc. ep 38, which mostly dealt with wu palace politics, should have been cut or streamlined imo and more time given to the characters we've actually been riding along with the whole story. by the time we get back to the pregnant empress, prince danyang, the first prince whose name i dont even remember, and the prime minister, i do not care about any of them and i think this subplot was simply just trying to fit too much shit into one bag

that said, this show still let the emotional moments hit and breathe and linger. i love the grief for the fallen liudao comrades as we go, as well as the less heavy but still emotionally important moments like yang ying and tongguan bonding over their upbringing. and we got a wedding /;3;/!!! for this show, the relationships and characters matter more than the storyline so im not mad about anything at all

side note: it's so gd millennial to have a story about a bunch of 30 something year olds who want to fake their deaths and retire into obscurity but instead they go and die for a boss they hate

CHARACTER STUFF

this show consistently brought a lot of depth to its side characters (and side side characters!!). i said it in an earlier post, but it bears repeating that even someone like deng hui i didnt expect anything from, but he got such good development and writing that he became a stealth fave. his dying words essentially being "dude, quit fucking around" ? iconic.

i didnt like tongguan as much as everyone else, so im pretty meh about everything regarding him. the attempt to force-wed ruyi was tonally really weird and didnt make sense (i assume there was some cuts made surrounding it). but LOL at him reusing all the outfits and decor immediately for his wedding to yang ying. baby duke, you tacky motherfucker. i ultimately think yang ying deserves better than him, but the good thing is that she knows this, so she'll be able to hold her own and then some entering into this partnership

shisan really was the heart in a lot of ways--the mom to yuanzhou's dad for the liudao. i was not expecting him to break my heart the way he did, but the fact that he held both qian zhao and sun lang as they died and then tried his best to remove yuan lu from harm and saved chu yue and was just very much a nurturer all the way through got me. his character couldve been cheap comic relief but the writing + performance really elevated him into one of the (imo) most memorable wuxia characters. his line wondering who would get to behead his beautiful skull!!! and how his mantra was always that he was going to drink the best wine, see the most beautiful women, and make the best of friends and he dies having lost the ability to see and having just had wine in memory of qian zhao, yuan lu, and sun lang. like. shut up!!

ruyi and yuanzhou were both so great and they're gonna be the drama OTP to beat forever. i loved the gender reversals, that they both were so respectful of each other, and that they also felt very mature in how they handled things and communicated. they were really interesting characters both together and apart and that's always a win-win. they had a schroedinger's ending where it's not super clear if they're alive or dead (i interpreted it as the latter), but what's kind of beautiful is that either option is satisfying to me. if they both died, they're reunited and with their comrades and the story is truly about the journey and the meaningful short connections we have. if they both survived, it's a bookend with the beginning where they each faked their deaths to escape. A+

COSTUMING

i gotta just separately mention the costuming for this show because it was 15/10. the textures, shisan's accessories, the way red became integrated with yuanzhou's wardrobe and blue with ruyi's. the details on the liudao name amulets!! SO GOOD. i love when characters' clothes tell a story on their own

overall i just really loved this drama it is probably my favorite wuxia ive seen so far! it's gonna be in my brain for awhile lol feel free to send fic prompts if you've made it this far :'D

[felipe-v-fanblog]

My Questions:

What is your favorite portrait of Felipe V and why?

What is Felipe V known for?

Is it true that he lived life thinking he was a frog?

ah thank you for asking about him !! he is my hyperfixation forever and ever <3 always happy to talk about any historical figure anyway

i will make a long-ass post i must confess that i dont know when to shut the fuck up:

FIRST OF ALL i really like the hyacinthe rigaud portraits. specially the last one, which i know one of the copies is at Versailles along with a portrait of his brother le petit Dauphin and his father le grand Dauphin and I believe there is one of Charles, duc de Berry too? which is also his brother. Anyway I am insane about all of them so of course its my favourite. BUT my favourite version of that portrait is this one:

he has a heart ! on his wig. over his forehead. there. i think its funny. This portrait has a lot of version which are too similar to eachother but this one is the only one with that weird thing on his wig. Also this one isnt actually for the public display that is why its on a very low quality its being sold. which is a Shame. Its from his second reign as that was the moment he started using the ponytail.

WHAT is felipe v known for is a eh interesting question as i think everybody knows the upside down portrait of him in Xátiva, near Valencia, which is the autonomous comunity which hates the most Philip V as far as I know ? SO he got a lot of hate during the war of spanish succession (1701-1714, starting approximately when he was 17, as he gets to Spain at 16 - it finished around the end of 1714, the year he marries his second wife, Elisabeth Farnese - also a very interesting character which i know a lot of people love a lot) . So eh the important stuff is that spaniards hated bourbons because Spain hates frenchmen ? for some reason ? but im british so im supposed to hate them too. So anyway after the war of succession which is ! ofc after charles ii death which i know you like a lot :3 i also really love him iiii I will keep talking about philip v as to not change subject. So. eh he was also the grandson of Louis XIV which I know spaniards hated because he was in war with the Habsburgs - its a conflict since Louis XIII s times - and they were very culturally different. In fact Philippe suffered a lot when he came to the spanish court a la Marie Antoinette because it was too different. But its like the contrary of Marie Antoinette, because he was suffering because spanish was boring and he didnt even knew spanish. He also felt pity against the gente de placer because they had different morals in the french court (ofc the activity its bad in itself but i will not state the obvious, yet in the court of louis xiv there are many examples of mentally ill or desfigured people which were supported by the state. ofc the majority of them were part of the royal family but anyway philippe knew he shouldnt make fun of these people - he was rather disturbed by the group). So anyway the habsburg faction was against him but he was rather welcomed to Spain, he himself didnt felt spanish enough to be king - and even had to be reassured of keep being king since very young, years before abdicating.

Clearing that out, because the story about Philippe going to Spain, or his childhood, or his first marriage; are all stuff I would talk on and on about, eh, I will proceed to talk about other stuff he is known for. During his first reign his first prime minister, which was a frenchman that Louis XIV send to fix Spain, did fix Spain; ofc not as good as Charles III would later do it, but did the first steps towards it. He also send to made very important buildings of Spain like el Palacio de la Granja, where he is actually buried along with his second wife Farnese. He is also known for being the first Bourbon king in Spain, may say the first bourbons were Isabel de Francia (first wife of Philip IV - sister of Louis XIII) and Maria Luisa de Orléans (first wife of Charles II - daughter of Philippe d Orleáns, brother of Louis XIV - you probably know the tale about Don Juan José negotiating the marriage ! its a funny story). There is also very peculiar characters during his reign like Don Blas de Lezo or the Cardinal Alberoni (which Philip himself made sure to make cardinal by spamming letters to the pope about making him a cardinal - Philip was very fond of him, and even made him his prime minister and Archobisp of Malagá), there is also Louis-Joseph of Vendôme (Luis José de Borbón, as he is known in Spain), which Philip also gave him his life and made him virrey de Cataluña, heir of the throne in case he did without childs, and marshal of Spain. He has a thing for giving the people he loves everything they ask for and more. Louis-Joseph is one of the most important military figures of the war of succession along with the duke of Berwick and the count of Tessé (marshal of France since Vendôme was exhiled from there. also a funny story. Vendôme was a real weird guy and I dont get to understand why Philippe liked him so much).

I finish the last section of this post. Which is getting big asf. The frog thing. Its very weird for me to see many people which make jokes about that ? I guess people think its funny ? but its not the only think he had issues with ? must say he was melancholic aka disordered since all his life. He was not know for being a normal kid, he was very quiet and shy. I know for a fact that he was bulimic, but he also presented a mood disorder, which has been mainly theorized to be Bipolar II, which I am actually okay with that version as he presented many of these traits - more tentative to depression, known as a hypomaniac state, and more tentative to psychosis. Even with that, psychology is very stained with a mysoginistic and racist history, and the diagnosis of male historical figures with bipolarity is one of them. First because they dont actually diagnose him with Bipolar II thats my own suggestion because spanish historians do their job terribly and dont even try to take it seriously enough to stand what kind of bipolarity are they talking about - they just threw off bipolarity because the mainstream idea of bipolarity is someone who tends to be happy for some moments and then deeply depressed. SO after throwing off my own agenda I will state the facts. He was deeply depressed and then went on a manic state from the sound of music. He employed an italian castrato - the most famous one ! - Farinelli to sing and play music for him, as he rested on the bed, and made him repeat the songs over and over again. He would have loved spotify. And after a lot of repetitions he even sang the songs himself, as these made him very happy. He also made Farinelly his prime minister (this guy seriously had problems with giving everything to the people he loved). He also had a very fucked up sleep schedule, making his ministers met him at the bed of his wife at 2 AM, as he never left these chambers. He had a big fear of dying, normal between Bourbons, and a big religious trauma since his childhood - he had a very severe tutor, which is actually a remarkable figure in the reign of Louis XIV; and even the spaniards were weirded out by how much he used to confess himself with Alberoni. He also had paranoid delusions, which are known to be bizarre, such as the time he thought his clothes were shining weird, and that they had poison, and because of that he started to use his wife s clothes (this is, well, a thing that happened for some reason. He ordered to only let nuns make his clothes for this). He was also hypersexual, and there is not a funny part about it, but I always joke about the fact that he was the first guy to drag a dildo to Spain (fun fact). So thats all. Ah he also thought for some time that his body parts would fall off and that he was a frog. Which the first is Cotard delusion and the other is just a bizzare delusion, as many psychotic delusions are. He liked to watch the gardens a lot, and used to be fascinated by the frogs jumping around it. This was a very small moment of his later years, when he barely left the bed, as he was very depressed. Thats the answer to the question. Now you know a lot about Philip V mental state which may or may not be funny. I think the frog thing was made popular by tiktok? but that was a very small part of his mental disorders. I love him a lot hehe. I personally think he had BPD as he was very fond of the people he loved and had many trust issues, and BPD also can make people more tentative to psychotic disorders and bipolarity. Spaniards tend to lie about the bourbons or exaggerate stuff because the historical records are tainted by habsburg faction, so the majority of my information comes from french people of the time. Feel free to ask questions or dont READ THIS AT ALL this is A BIGASS POST. I can also recommend free pdfs to read about his time blablabla I specially like Liselotte (Elizabeth of the Palatinade) letters and the memoirs of Saint-Simon, even if he talks a bit too badly about Louis-Joseph or le grand Dauphin.

[helluvabossrewrite45]

Always sunny anon replying: funny you mentioned Bojack being I believe Viv has said in the past on her twitter that she wants HB to be the next BH yet seems to not understand what makes a show like Bojack work to begin with. (I'll admit I haven't watched Bojack Horseman yet. I've been sleeping on it way to long tbh).

Yeah absolutely. Viv doesnt seem to get that bojack worked in not only in its ability to make people like bojack while not excusing his actions, but also how its structured as 'comedy turned drama'.

(major spoilers for bojack horseman btw, you can just skip to the end/the last paragraph of this post)

Now in bojack's first season, it was a comedy pretty early and stayed that way till later down the season and it continued to grow naturally to a drama (though the comedy is still there of course). Helluva boss though, seems to be all over the place as just after episode 1, episode 2 takes a more serious/dramatic approach when the show is meant to appear at first to be a dark humoured comedy, along with most of the season not even sticking to its original premise, instead focusing more of set ups and stolitz drama that both didnt go much of anywhere (striker might be an exception though i feel like the end with him could be another set up). What wouldve worked is that episode 1 - 4 is entirely on the original premise for helluva boss and the rest would be more serious (with strikers introduction, the agents and stolitz drama) with season 2 continuing the more serious approach. Hell, if their gonna include stolas family drama, why not portray it as comedy at first, then use it later on to portray it more seriously. Like in season 1 of bojack where he and sarah lynn slept with each other, its being treated as comedic. But when he revealed that he slept with her in the interview, its being treated completely seriously and use it to highlight bojacks problem from him with young women and his issues with accountability, episode 2 could portray the cheating as comedic (with stella throwing objects while rambling while stolas dodges them like a dodgeball game with octavia initially being presented as the typical 'lonely stuck in the mud teenager' but we still get hints of her being more than that later down the episode) and while it ends on them leaving the festival in an awkward comedic way, that would used in seeing stars where octavia vents about her family drama, including on how neglectful stolas has become as a father from the festival incident. Im kinda surprised viv didnt consider to use it because it would be a perfect tool for helluva boss to use.

Another reason why bojack worked compared to helluva boss is its characters. While bojack was written well, the rest of the characters (especially women) shine through and we get to see more of who they are overtime. We dont really get much on that with helluva (especially the women), sure we get their backstories though we dont really have much depth if that make sense. Like when we compare todd to moxxie, todd's deal is that he's extremely helpful and he actually have stuff going on for him, its only bojack thats holding him back so when he finally distance himself from bojack, not only is it consistent but its also not repetitive, instead we get to know more about todd, seeing his relationships, discovering his asexuality etc...hell, he even has his own episode where he learn to make time for himself too instead of always helping out everyone. Moxxie has an arc of overcoming his weakness but the thing is, it repeats the same arc that it can get tiring to watch. What would work for him is that he slowly develops him overcoming his weakness instead of it just being repeated (like maybe further snapping at blitzo or confess that he considers quitting) Its a real shame too because him being close to morally good than morally grey or bad (which i predict thats what most of hells beings would be) opens a gate to a lot of possibilities for him as a character like why he took the job, how he met his wife, how he views the world around him etc...but they clearly didnt know what to do with him especially when season 1 wasnt even properly planned (as viv literally admits this on twitter too) so its why he as a character feels stagnant. But a bigger comparison however, has to be the women in the shows. People tend to praise the show for how it writes its women characters, often from diane and princess caroline. They're shown to be as messy and complex as men like bojack in the show though other women characters had their time to shine like hollyhock, kelley, gina, penny, bojack's mother etc...Its clear that bojack writes both men and women well in the show. Helluva boss on the other hand, is quite unbalanced in its writing for men and women. Specifically with the men having more variety and generall knowledge about them than the women. Like millie and loona, despite being major characters, have very little depth especially with millie who wouldnt even be a character if we remove her from moxxie. And even with the other women characters, they dont have much depth either (or at last we dont get to see that depth often like with verosika), they all in some way are in the roles for men characters (octavia and loona being there to establish the good in stolas and blitzo or stella and verosika being there to establish to either be the villain or to show a part of the man's past) Its very clear that viv favours men characters than women as alastor and angel dust having more going on than charlie, the main character herself. I mean, both shows are technically character driven and to be character driven, your gonna have to make sure your characters can equally shine on their own instead of one having more depth than the other.

To put it shortly, i dont think viv really gets why bojack was successful to audiences to begin with and in turn, failed to achieve that success with it being how she structures her show for the 'comedy turned drama' style being all over the place when bojacks was of natural progress and her imbalanced/poorly planned writing of men and women characters where it wasn't an issue in BoJack

[my-castles-crumbling]

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiii Omg i havee SOOO much to tell and ask you its both sad and fun stuff, First off i wanna tell you that you are such an amazing person like seriously omggg how do u even exist like you must not be allowed away from heaven. Btw random: i heard u mention abt u in university so hows that going and whats ur majorr???? :)) And now the very very bad stuff: i messed up. not very uncommon you see, but very bad. my cousin whom i rllyyy love shes amazing shes like the andromeda to my sirius. nd my dad's side is very cruel to my mom before i ws born and they also shamed her for having a kid (my sis) that has problems (they refuse to tell me what it is but she has 2 problems idk the first one she has since birth and the second is that she had um.. men parts but when she was around 4/5 we founf out shes.. female? im a minor i rlly dont undersrand how ths works so..yeah. shes 8 now btw this year shes gonna be 9 y/o) basically very cruel people very very bad and so my cousin, whos from my dad's side, she came for like a sleepover thingy and my father commented on my mom's side and how they arent close to me even though they are my basucaly everything.. and in reply, i said how i like them and they are good and i said "my mums side is great... better than father side atlst" and she said "i can hear u yk" and i said that shes a excpetiion but when she wnt home she really felt upset and she had an exam but she stll didnt come to my house (my house is closer to her school so she stays here in exam time so it takes less tme in travelling) so my father cmpletly blamed me and now im so upset idek what to do i dont wanna apologize to her cz she doesnt know that i know that she said shes upset. my father confronted me about it and he got to jknow from my cousins mom so there was no direct contact but basically yeah thats it. i need help in what i should do to fix things again :( but this is the reason that simply talking wouldnt work and its rlly hard :( btw random: how do i start my microfic thing like do i just upoad a micfic or do i post smgthn else first if ykwim? another thing:

yeah idk but i think m bisexual and i have a bestfriend shes straight and supports lgbtq+ community but i rlly like her and cz were besties i dont wnanna ruin anything at all and im cool with how we r rn but at the same time i want more ykwim? and.. were like the touchy-feely kinda bestfriends so we hold hands n stuff as a joke nd people ship us and its so asdxdfgkhljhxx idek if i rlly like her as a frnd or i like her as in like like her.. but i also have a crush on a boy but it only lasts for 2 secs but when i see him again i start to thibk i like him again but my other rlly gud friend likes him so is it that i like hm and ignore my feelings js cs my frnd liks him or do i just like him as frnds,, idek were close we play games togheter n stuff but thtas about it..

also have i mentioned how much of an angel you are??? i literally scream and jump off a cliff casually when u reply to my texts <333 ilysm ur such a great person <333

xoxo, sweet potato <33

hi!

Aww you're so sweet! I'm not in university anymore, at least not in the traditional sense: I'm working on my master's degree. It's going.....not terrible lol. I'm majoring in ESL Education (English as a Second Language).

For your first question: I think this is a really good example of how talking through other people isn't the best solution. Do you have any way of getting in contact with your cousin directly? Because things are definitely going to be changed and exaggerated if you are talking through your aunt and dad. Once you talk to her, be truthful. Be sincere and tell her how important she is to you. I'm betting she'll come around.

For microfics: Nope, just go for it! You don't have to do anything beforehand, just start! I can't wait to see what you write!

For the last part: First, are you sure you friend is straight? If she definitely is, then yeah, it might not be worth it to say anything? But I mean, you could always try bringing it up casually. Like "Oh, I think you're really pretty!" and see what happens?

With the guy- I know it sounds cliche, but if your friend likes him, stay away. I've been there. I've seen friendships fall apart. It's not worth it, especially since you're not even sure of your feelings. I know I probably sound like a parent, here, but there was a full-on FEUD I experienced in eighth grade because two people were fighting over a guy and....yeah.

Thank you so much for the compliments, you're so nice!! <3 I hope you have a great day!

[draculagerard]

You know how sometimes I send questions I could easily Google to your inbox because it’s more fun to hear a friend talk about their interests than see what the internet says?

Well anyway today it occurred to me that despite having absorbed a lot of spn knowledge through tumblr osmosis, I know basically nothing about Sam Winchester, one of the main characters of the show. Like I feel like I’ve got a at least a vibe of what Dean is like just from like … seeing memes and Destiel posts and stuff, but I could not describe Sam to you. Which feels like a shame.

So what’s his deal? What’s his personality like? What kind of character arc does he go through? Any Sam Winchester hot takes?

HII yes I would absolutely love to talk about him. so basically to explain his Thing, I need to give a little lore drop (bear with me).

Before he was born, his mother made a deal with a demon to let him in her house in 10 yrs. So when Sam was 6 months old, Azazel came into the Winchesters' home, fed baby Sam his own blood (and then killed Mary). Now, this ritual basically gave Sam psychic powers that he discovers in his early 20s, which is where the show begins.

Now time for an essay. Im sorry you ask me about Sam Winchester and I cannot shut up.

Anyway his whole thing is that he is The Freak and that he feels Unclean. And even before he knew it was the demon blood, he was like there is something inherently wrong and dirty about me and stuff. Theres a quote that kind of puts together all the scenes of him talking about that

"I remember looking at this picture of Sir Galahad [as a little kid] , and, and, and he was kneeling, and— and light streaming over his face, and— I remember… thinking, uh, I could never go on a quest like that. Because I'm not clean. I mean, I w— I was just a little kid. You think… maybe I knew? I mean, deep down, that— I had… demon blood in me, and about the evil of it, and that I'm— wasn't pure?" And then he talked about how something that was slowly killing him was "purifying him".

And no matter what he did or where he went, he didnt fit in. Not in his family, not in any of his schools, and not even when he ran away from home to go to college to live out his "normal life".

Personality wise, he's the kind of guy who always can make other people talk about their own feelings, and he acts all sensitive and kind, but also he's a fucking hypocrite because he never tells anyone how he feels. It's very fun comparing Dean and Sam because Dean is like No i Cannot tell anyone how I feel and then spills his guts and then Sam is like Sharing feelings is healthy :) and then takes every genuine emotion to his grave.

More on his personality: Overall he's pretty like sarcastic and bitchy but in a younger brother kind of way. In the beginning he started off very angry and explosive and always jumped headfirst into problems. As the show went on, though, he just got visibly exhausted and tired of being angry and became the full opposite, where he's the one who never got angry while Dean became the angry one.

Also, veryyy important, he is the Nerd One. Like his catch phrases are "according to the lore" and "so get this", both said while looking at his laptop screen, reading through a bunch of stuff. He's the one who does the research and shit.

Actually wait. youre a tma fan. I can explain him very easily by telling you that he's like if Jon was a SPN character. Yk how Jon starts getting powers and it's a horror thing and he has crises about how much he's human and how much he's a monster. Exactly that. And also yk Jon's guilt thing? Sam has that too. Ofc with the human/monster element, but also you know how Jon blames himself for starting the apocalypse but in reality he was just a pawn who actually set off the last trigger? Sam did that EXACTLY and blames himself too. Also the nerd thing lol.

Sam Winchester hot takes? I have literally so many but none of them will seem hot with my curated tumblr. Like saying that Sam's thing about being impure is literally just a metaphor for being queer. Not intentionally queercoded but wow is it fucking queercoded. Oh actually a hot take is that I love late-seasons Sam as well and will defend him to my GRAVEEE.

I have so much to say but no way can I fit it all on this post soooooo... hope that gave you a basic understanding of him !!!!

[urapunk]

I wanna add stuff that I didnt get to in my last post, so have fun with more Bruna facts!!

Bruna Rodrigues HCs!

(.... Or just normal facts...)

Has an odd fascination with internet mysteries, lost media stuffs, all that. It's juet an odd liking, watching shitty quality videos about stuff thats been lost to time. Has an odd fascination with London After Midnight, the lost movie, not the band.

Kleptomaniac, particularly small things. She will snatch post it notes, pens, pencils, mechanical pencils especially. Will gladly return them, shamefully ofcourse, but she just cant really help it. Also steals chapstick, like, from stores. Not people... Just an odd urge of hers. Cant resist it when she sees an intriguing scent or flavor. You can and will find her slipping those thin little lip balms into her pocket at the Yum Yum Market.

I mentioned she loves Siouxsie and The Banshees last post. Her favorites are Arabian Knights and Spellbound, and often listening to them makes her feel like she needs it injected in her bloodstream. Loves Le Tigre too, most particularly the song Phanta.

Brat. Klept-HOE-maniac. Deserves to be shamed for her crushes often times. When she gossipss with christy she's HONEST. Rookie mistake honestly, but she'll whisper about some of the ugliest guys at bullworth; Like Constantinos for example, and Petey, even once Troy Miller... I personally hate troy. He's fugly.

Skeleton flowers, moonflowers, RAINFLOWERS, ALL OF THEM! She goes insane for flowers, she'd give you her first born for a cute little bouquet of daffodils or red lilies.

FAAAAASHIOONN!! Loves halter tops and baggy cargo jeans. No clue why, she just really likes it. Can never have anything plain or boring, it has to be colors that wouldnt fit right normally, like yellow and purple, or blue and brown. She finds a way to make it work, for sure.

Always has themey socks. Her go to with her uniforms are one blue sock and another yellow one. She's silly like that, but also like the poser of silliness. 4th of july? Blue star socks. Shes not even american and she still celebrates, how sweet of her! (She couldnt care less. Fireworks, tanktops, and flashy socks are perfect for her insterest.)

<3

(Songs that make me think of her!! Special mention!!!)

[againtodreaming]

Firstly, when you get this, you have to answer with 5 things you like about yourself, publicly. Then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers (non-negotiable, positivity is cool)

@lyloneliness you send the first ask but also @mavr4xx @vinylbiohazard @ghostsinacoat @yumaisbored you also asked this too and omg i love u all but also, why do you do this to me 😭😭😭 i was already struggling a lot to think of 5 things with the first ask (and i still haven't even gotten to the tag game of this), and now I have to think of TWENTY-FIVE?!? ˚‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )‧º·˚ (plus 5 more if I end up finding the tag game again plus the ability to think of 5 more...)

Anyways, thank you so much for the asks (´,,•ω•,,)♡ ଘ(੭ˊᵕˋ)੭* ੈ✩‧₊♡ (even if they are the hardest asks I have done in my life 💀) (it was interesting and fun tho 🌟) you are all awesome 💖🌟💞 now here we go:

(25 things here in the same post bc…not sure I just started doing it after @ all of u and I am doing this draft in my phone and separating this in the other asks i still have to look for is too much work) (apologies for the length, the further i got, the longer some of the answers became😅)

1 - My hair (used to be really thick and my mom used to make this amazing hairstyles almost every day when I was a kid—there was one that was a huge rose made of braids or smth, the hairpins were awful and it took so long but it was so pretty, I think my mom even made it for the wedding of one of her friends, anyways I lost maybe more than half of my hair when I was like 15, stress probably, and then I decided to cut it even below the shoulder—first time in my life it was so short—bc I was so mad with it but also bc I had zero energy to even try to take care of it by that point. Grown back until like my mid-back—used to have it like waist length before—by now and now I got maybe a little more than half of the hair that I used to have at 13 which is a lot better than it was at 15 and hopefully it gets back to what I used to have in a couple of years more, but for now it's enough to start playing with it and doing braids)

2 - Open-mindedness

3 - Creativity

4 - Patience

5 - That I'm an older sister

6 - Uf, how do I explain this one—like, empathy? kindness? feeling things deeply? putting yourself in the other person's shoes and being considerate of that? being too sentimental? which can be really annoying too but I wouldn't trade it so...

7 - That I can talk really fast

8 - Being expressive

9 - Always thinking things through

10 - Confident in my likes? (okay, so this one feels complicated, but for example, when I was a little kid, 6 or 7 years old probably, I loved superheroes, but my classmates in my all-girls school were like, that's for boys 😒, and I felt horrible bc that was just another thing in that i didnt fit in with everyone else and i always wanted to fit in, but somehow—which looking back feels weird bc who even knew i could be surprisingly confident in some aspects—was that i never thought i was in the wrong for liking superheroes? Like, yeah, I always wanted to fit in and I felt bad that I didn't, but even with all the social insecurity I was constantly plagued with, I never felt like I was in the wrong for being myself or that I should change myself or pretend to like stuff I didn't just to fit in (that strategy didn't even cross my mind until I was…can't be sure, it was somewhere in the last few years in this country, it was either a documentary, fiction, or the group therapy, but the idea of actual people in real life doing smth they didn't agree and had no purpose except to fit in was like: 🤯!?!!?!?!) (I didn't handle it that well either to be fair, if I wasn't with my friends i just decide to hide during recess and/or to not speak at all with anyone, until I changed schools) (I liked the 2nd school better). I assume that in my head I was like: "shame that I'm not like all of you but what can you do, I'm me ╮(╥﹏╥)╭ "

11 - I'm usually also all or nothing with almost all things? Like, for example, math. I don't like math, it has always been the class I struggled with the most and all my math teachers in Peru were really strict and thank goodness that my dad loves math and really good at it or I would have been lost without someone to explain it to me. But last week, my parents got an email from my math teacher who was telling them how proud she was of me and how I always strove to understand everything and there was some implication that I did it bc I liked what I was learning, which like, I mean, I like geometry a lot more than algebra bc it's simpler, and I don't exactly hate it, but I certainly wouldn't do it for pleasure. At all. And yeah, I ask her about everything I don't understand (she insisted to the whole class to please ask her anything if we needed help, so i had permission; if she wasn't available tho, I just would have asked my dad or a friend who is good at math to explain it to me) and ask her to show me exactly what I did wrong and what would be the correct answer but all of that is bc well, if I'm going to do well in the class, I need to understand what I did wrong in order to fix it, and like, math classes always build on each other, so if I don't smth I will later have problems with it, and also like, I'm already stuck with the class whether I like it or not, if I'm going to do smth, I'm going to do it well. Which is smth my mom has complained a lot of times, especially during last school year when I had a lot of late assignments bc I was too anxious about doing any of them bc I was afraid of doing it wrong or bc I didn't have the energy to think clearly so I wouldn't be able to do my best so like yeah…I ended up not doing the assignments at all (this is the part that I hate about this all or nothing thing with me, but let's focus on the positive side right now). Or with projects, I once stayed awake until like 5 am like several nights straight to do a project for economics class which like…I decided to make my own illustrations for each slide of the ppt to illustrate the information on top of doing the reading and answering the questions stuff…and I was already in a hurry with it bc I didn't know the school put assigned summer readings in the school's website (it was my first year in this country and nobody had said anything about it the year prior, plus it was quarantine time) and the teacher gave me a few extra days bc I still needed to hurry up in reading the book so yeah, I should have done smth more simple and fast to just submit it and get a grade but it wouldn't have been doing my best, not even near my best and I was already compromising on some stuff to not take too long since there wasn't too much time for my initial ideas so…yep. The teacher loved my project tho (and gave me a 100 even tho it was one day late) and asked if she could use it for her class of next year soooo…totally worth it. But yeah, i was sort of confused that Geometry teacher thought to send an email like that when I have only been trying to understand the concepts I am assigned to learn?

Thinking, thinking, thinking….you know what, I want to put my height in here just annoy my sister (she would be all dramatic annoying fake pitying dramatic gasp about it and would drag the younger ones to her side of the argument) but she wouldn't even see it plus I don't actually care about heights (I just care that she's annoying about it almost daily) so that would also be a lie so another thing….you know what, i already got 11 in one morning, coming back to this later

12 - Okay, so I hate all my health problems, absolutely hate them, so annoying and expensive and restricting and confusing BUT—how do I word this…it has 2 parts…umm…okay, so I'm really familiar with the clinic in Peru I used to go all the time and, okay I hated having to go to the clinic so many times, especially towards the end, but I liked being familiar with it? Like, the people, the sense of a community, the building, the routine. It was probably more familiar than my schools since I changed schools a few times while the clinic was there ALWAYS (until we moved countries and I never expected to miss the fucking clinic but it happened which wtf but also makes sense which also omg mila (ノ◇≦。) but also, the medical system was definitely easier and less expensive than whatever the fuck they have going on here, plus not having all our usual doctors, so there is also a practical reason aside from me unreasonably missing everything that was familiar including things I didn't even like much). That's the first part. Second part is that it has brought…lessons ig. Like, idk, it's been a huge formative part of my life. About health and food and family stuff and experiences. Like, I hate having the health problems (they are A LOT better now than when I was younger as long I do some things to keep it that way, but yeah, really grateful for that) but also, I don't really know who I would be without those experiences? Changed the whole family too so like…idk, it's weird but felt worth mentioning.

13 - That I'm really curious and like learning.

14 - Sense of style

15 - Loyalty—to people (like, even swallowed down all my shyness and anxiety to try to reconnect with some childhood friends I hadn't talked in forever bc moving countries and depression thing) (going well, really happy that we are talking again) but also like to interests and values ig? Like, most of my likes (superheroes, anime, drawing, maybe writing but not sure about that one, all started before I even turned 8 y/o) and like, aside from maturing and a couple of things, I don't think I've changed much at all. I have never stopped liking smth I used to like anyways.

16 - Openness ig? Like, I never want to be a bother so it depends on the person and the history i have with them and sometimes on the occasion, but I never really had any problems asking for help or speaking about my problems or feelings

17 - My handwriting when it's not written in a hurry

18 - My attention to detail

19 - Not getting mad easily—which is you know good with being an older sister too bc like...my dad is really annoying (but like jokingly annoying) and a lot of times bc of it (or some other times other family members) my sister and my mom get mad about some small comment they take seriously and then they get angry and leave the table or living room or whatever and then it's like all awkward bc the mood got broken (which also, a little hypocritical especially bc the sister also loves to be annoying in purpose with everyone of us) but unlike them, the middle sister and me like...we don't really care much about it? We are usually the ones that get more teased by the others but it's like, smth one therapist didn't understand, which was so annoying wtf did setting boundaries had to do with my siblings being annoying, I don't care that they are annoying bc it's like, we usually get along well (presently; there used to be constant fighting between 2 of them we were little but they are better now) and they have always been annoying but it's like, a game, I know they are not serious about the matter. I can be annoying back if I feel like it and it's all in good fun. The only times I don't like it it's when it's actually serious, with you know, intention to hurt or being passively aggressive mad about smth, stuff like that. Point is that yeah, it's also good for sibling diplomacy bc I'm rarely the one getting mad with the other ones.

20 - That I like dogs

…I can't think of 5 more. Uf, let's see…okay, getting desperate here but—

21 - That I'm Peruvian

22 - Good at cooking

23 - Good at planning

24 - My self-awareness

25 - That I like to be more positive and hopeful about things in general I think? (myself is usually an exception) Constant argument with my sister bc she can be so pessimistic sometimes. Like, life is already hard enough as it is, having fun and connecting with people makes things more enjoyable, so why not try to focus on the bright side whenever possible and make things better. She thinks I'm naive, I know I can be naive, but also, if I have to live I'm going to enjoy it bc what's the point otherwise. Generalizing things doesn't help. I think.

OKAY!! DONE!! 25 THINGS!!! FINALLY 😭💖

Thank you again and I hope you are all doing well <33

[rontra]

this ask/reply is long so im just putting it together as a textpost help me shark if you're out there

Anonymous asked: hi ok im super super sorry if this is bothering you but ive been meaning to ask it for like 6 months or something . i was introduced to your work via skin game and my brain latched to it ever since i read it. me and some other friends really enjoyed the fic even if it was a short read and i was wondering if youre comfortable sharing chapter 2 either publicly or privately? again im ultra mega sorry if this comes off as creepy or weird or something ive been stressing over it for liek 3 days since i didnt want to bother you :(

either way, love your work so much. your fanart introduced me to both arknights and rwby (though a friend kind of pushed me to actually start watching it lol) and theyre both really great series :) your work is a huge inspiration for me and my friend group and your writing is just insane /pos

(3rd paragraph omitted bc i cant priv reply and im excluding your offsite info even if its under a readme HFDBHJF)

hi shark!! ofc i remember you we are like soldiers side by side in the trenches of takano posting 🫡

so first of all thank you so much for following and enjoying my work 🥰 i'm always happy to help drag people into the arknights/rwby zone HEHEHE i'm glad you enjoy what i make!!! it means a lot to me 😊 thank you!!!

now. THE THING ABOUT skin game ch2. is that it's pretty rough. i had a look at it the last time something prompted me to think about the fic and it's not really presentable (i don't know if i even finished editing it back in ….. 6 years ago… oh god). it also doesn't have all of its art (which might be a blessing in disguise given the art it does have is …. 6 years old… oh god)

getting it to a state i consider readable would take a good chunk of work, which is why i put it off again after looking at it. it's almost 12 thousand words of … uhhh… shall we say… unnnnpolished material. i think i couldn't even share it privately because i would be embarrassed to show someone something so unfinished and janky. not to mention not having all of its art finished. so i got kind of stuck last time and just put it off again bc the amount of work it very obviously needed was like. "Christ OK Not Now" yknow…

it does bolster the spirit when i remember you and your friends. it means a lot to me that you care about it even after so long!!! i just have NO idea when i'm going to get around to editing something of that magnitude @_@ i was really a dummy about chapter lengths back then… HFDBHJGJMK

it's really kind of a shame too becahse chapter 1 and 2 together are sort of the introductory portion for our 2 primary characters. so it feels like only half of the intro is done right now. since ch1 detailed how kyrie ended up at that plaza meeting takano, ch2 would detail how takano ended up there, meeting kyrie. and then we would proceed into the future from there. as a renowned Takano Guy, obviously i was very interested in this, but for various reasons i never finished polishing it and drawing the art…

ch2 also features ikuko so you KNOW its dear to me

overall being like 5-6 yrs old theres a disconnect where i don't feel like ch2 right now is achieving what it should, and i see a lot of concrete problems with concrete solutions, but it's an editing of such Magnitude that it keeps being pushed back in favor of other stuff. oh, ephemeral soul…

some of the art i did get done for it is pretty cute though, like these baby miyos;

so that's pretty good, but i didnt FINISH drawing the art, ARGHH

it is really hard to say. bc when i KNOW there's people out there who remember it and care about it, that does motivate me to return to it. but it has a lot of stuff that needs doing, and is a very old project, so it's unclear to me right now when it would receive the attention it desperately needs before it can be shown to other people... i super can't in clear conscience accept anything like payment/etc for that kind of vague half-promise either, although i appreciate the thought xD

i'm sorry it's such an inconclusive answer, but i am sort of an inconclusive guy when it comes to projects... i jump around a lot as i'm sure you've observed in your time following me 😭 it's important to me to have that freedom, but i do care about SG too, so we just sort of have to see if i can surmount the magnitude of the work i accidentally set up for myself half a decade ago (*turning into stone*)

but it makes me smile when i remember you're out there thinking about this weird little AU. so, thanks. 😌 a soul still burns...

.

and then after all that CH3 was going to have more of best girl 🥺.....

WARGH <- BEARER OF THE CURSE

[roman-cup]

You have pretty eyes

Garrance oneshot based on my PDH rewrite I didnt write yet

Posted on ao3 and quotev before, now its here

past garmau and garroth x ivy  mentioned

"You have beautiful eyes." Laurance looked over at Garroth, who clearly does not understand personal space, as he leaned VERY close to Laurance face. He blinked "..Thanks..?" He did not blush because that would be lame and he's a shadow knight hes not lame! Garroth nodded. He moved away and looked back at his work. Laurance stared to see if he would say anything else. He did not. Ok then? Laurance had hetrochromia. One eye blue one green. but, still? Unprompted?? "Uh...??? Elaborate?" "On what?" "Dude??" "Oh. You're eyes are pretty" he shrugged. "Like, the sun is hitting them right now and its pretty" Laurance, for some embarrassing reason. Responded to that by throwing his hand in front of his eyes. Which is stupid, because who cares if he looks at his eyes? Weird compliment aside. Lucky Garroth had just looked away again. -- It was there Junior year of high school and Garroth and Laurance have been dating for 1 year. "You're eyes are pretty" Garroth grinned as he put his head on Laurance shoulder, showing off his braces clearly. Laurance was finally able to get his braces off a few months ago. Maybe he felt bad eating popcorn in front of him, but all in all? Not his fault his boyfriend has to wear braces. Plus Laurance still has to suffer. The dentist said he has to wear a retainer?? Forever?? Garroth, competently unaware of Laurance internal monologue continues to speak "They're all shiny and stuff.." Laurance smiled and held his hand, but held a laugh. "Deja vu" "Whatt..?" Garroth looked up at him "You already told me my eyes were prettyyy" Laurance sung light heartily. Laurance is still not sure if Garroth was trying to flirt with him freshman year, or if he was just, like that. "No I didn't...oh no" Garroth sat up "You remembered that?" "I was supposed to forget?" He laughed. "Yes!" Garroth grabbed his shoulders "oh my irene.." he groaned "That has haunted me..," "Oh and I'm dramatic?" He elbowed him lightly "Come on, its not like I was gonna be upset that my -favorite person- and love of my life likes my eyes' Laurance tried to comfort "You didn't like me freshman year" he corrected, he crossed his arms, and cracked a smile. Still embarrassed. "You don't know that." Neither did Laurance, to be honest. When DID he start to like him? He knows he likes him now, obviously, but he didn't even notice until after GarroTh and Aph had broken up. "Well did you?" Garroth looked at him "If you did I'd feel bad, because I didn't" Laurance thought. Well, Laurance did flirt with him that year, and last year, he was joking thought...right? "Oh yeah I'm heartbroken, and it was so platonic and straight of you to tell me how nice my eyes were by the way" Garroth flushed embarrassed again. "My boyfriend thinks my eyes are pretty~" Laurance sung. To add to his shame. "Oh hush, come it was weird, that I said that!" Laurance shrugged. He definitely thought it was weird when he said it. He still hung out with him after though, so, he got over it. "So like,, why did you say it? I mean I know you said you didn't like me but like,, was that flirtingggg? Orr?" Garroth shrugged. "Who knows. I haven't seen two eye colors much, I figured it was cool" Laurance nodded. He held Garroth hand "Hmm." He hummed again and grinned "My boyfriend thinks my eyes are pretty~" Garroth groaned light-heartily "Oh hush you love me." Laurance laughed "Yeah I do" he laughed a bit.  "What?" "What? I didn't say anything, nope." "Nope don't do that." Laurance stared at him, flustered.

They hadn't really used the 'i love you' phase. Yes, nicknames like "love" "lovely" "love of my life" where definitely there, but the actual words? Nope. "You love me?" Laurance looked up him. He asked casually, or he tried very hard to, and that what matter right? A for effort? Garroth shrugged. "I dont..know?" He said honesty. "I feel like I do! But I thought I loved Aphmau too." "Oh yeah.." Laurence bit his lip. "But like" Garroth continued "We know that didn't like-" he put his own hands in the air to visually demonstrate and short line "go on for long." "Yeahhh-"

"And there was my relationship with Ivy freshman year,,poor girls still mad at me for it."

"I wouldn't call her a 'poor girl'"

Garroth rolled his eyes. "whatever, my point is- I'm scared."  Laurance looked up "offf-" he looked around like what he was saying was forbidden, and it kinda felt like it was "Saying I love you?" Garroth nodded. Relaxing and putting his head back on Laurance shoulder, Laurance put an arm around him. "I don't want to go on and saying things like that and have it end up being wrong again. I mean me and Aph are still friends thankfully, But-" Laurance just stared at him. He felt he should comment on this this speech, but he didn't want to interrupt. Plus, now he was wondering, did he love Garroth? "But- I don't really want to lose you- an-and! I,, currently would like to date you as long as you let me- but if-" Garroth held his hands up again to vaguely gesture as he spoke " if I say -that- I think it would be worse when you.. no longer want to." Garroth ended awkwardly. Then blushed "I am sorry for the speech, I ruined the moment, didn't I?" He chuckled. Laurance stared at him. Before he shook his head to get rid of his thoughts. He then shook it again. "No way!" He yelled. Then put a hand over his mouth and sighed. "You didn't ruin anything dude, don't worry about that. Plus,, I dunno that was kinda sweet.." "Its sweet that I won't say I love you..?" Garroth looked at Laurance weirdly. "I must have explained it was wrong then" Laurance giggled "No no, but like, I dunno.." he started using a hand to nervously play with his hair. It made it down past his shoulders by now. Geez. "I like knowing you wanna stay with me." "Well..yeah of course I do.." Laurence looked at him smiled and continued "By the wayyy, if that's the case, Then this relationship won't end because I am going to propose the moment I can..". Laurence, despite only being 16, nodded proudly. Fully trusting this statement. This didn't seem to shake Garroth, who is also 16, for long. He stared at him a moment before laughing "Oh please, I'll beat you too it." "Oh yeah?" "Yes!" "We will see..." "Well-!"Garroth looked ready to say something, then stopped himself. Laurence bit his lip nervously, did he cross a line somehow. Was marriage to much? "Well..what?" "Nothing,,nothing" Laurance frowned. "YOU..ok? Sorry I- oh my irene" he groaned " you just talked about not wanting to bring up 'I love yours and I bring up marriage, fuck-.sorry" he facepalmed. "What no no it was sweet!" Garroth looked at him "I'm not upset, I just paused because-" "Causeee?'" "I figured.. I could beat you too it if I do it -now- "You're ...proposing now..?" Laurance stated blanking. Yeah, he said it, but, seriously, they were 16. "Well no not that but.. I figured. We could get promise rings?" "Ohhhh- so like, a promise to stay together." "Yeah! When we are older,, well we will see..but- oh fuck that would be going to far again-" Garroth put his hands over his face. "See? Even I can't stop myself from going to far!" "I mean- we don't have to..butt.. I won't mind." Garroth looked up over his hands "Really?" Laurance nodded "yeah, really" he stared to grin. Laurance had no idea WHEN he started to like Garroth really, and maybe love was still a strong word, but Laurance knew he wanted Garroth to be in his life. Which, whenever Laurance thought of a future he though marriage. So? Why not? Garroth sat up and smiled "OK! I'll buy us rings! Oh wanna help or a surprise." "Surprise me!" "Ok!" Garroth seems to have calmed down. That was good. "Oh and by the way." Laurence started. "What?" "Back to the whole, love thing.. how about this.. we can say,, I love you,, if you want, but not in super serious way, yet yeah?" "Hmm yeah. Ok then. Should I say it now." "I'll say it back if you do." "Ok."Garroth took a breath "Laurance I love you,," he closed his eyes for a second, like he expected everything to crash right now, when it didn't he added" anndd your eyes are still shiny." he grinned.  "Pf-" laurance laughed "Well I love you too...anndd I love your eyes too." "Oh yeah?" "Yeah!" Garroth laughed, he kissed Laurance cheek "I think we are dorks" "Oh you are. I'm cool though" laurance nudged him "its ok though, your adorable" "Hmp,, okk Mr. Long bright orange hair." "You LIKED my hair" "Not relevant" "Also-" Laurance gestured to his hair, his brown roots growing out but the bottom half was definitely orange, just slightly faded. Still bright though "its STILL orange, dickhead" "So..I win?" "No, your a dork" "Damn it" Laurance grabbed his hand once again "Hey." "Hn?" "I love you" Garroth sighed "I love you too." 

[the-cunt-of-montecristo]

the croatian anon here - it honestly kinda surprises me italians are bigoted against croats. i thought its just your prime minister. i didnt know its also the opinion of people. 😅

tho whenever they come as tourists they insist on speaking italian for some reason, but i always thought its them not knowing english. or is it because of seeing dalmatia/istria still as parts of italy?

as for rijeka i actually remember the actual document fabrication to make it into an italian city.

I don't know if bigoted is the right word. There's definitely xenophobia towards eastern european countries, as I was saying in my other post, there are tiers of citizenship and privilege within Europe. There isn't a homogenous attitude towards Istria and Dalmatia, that I'm aware of at least, it's mostly something that comes up in right wing environments.

I guess my perception of the Istrian situation is skewed because of my family, because after WWII and the mess that followed my family had to pick up and run and spent several years in refugee camps, and they always felt like the stuff they went through before and after leaving Rijeka was just kind of forgotten. With a general lack of context awareness, it's easy to just blame the whole situation on "yugoslavia stole our land", especially because (and it shames me incredibly to say it) my great-grandfather was chugging the fascist propaganda.

The specific talking point of getting Istria and Dalmatia back is very fascist, especially considering how and when they were last past of Italian territory... Curiously the fascists don't have the same attitude towards other territories that have been at various points Italian soil and that now belong to "better" european countries, like France. Or at least I haven't seen them talking about them.

The language thing I think is a mix of entitlement and genuine lack of English skills. I know that the expectation to be understood when speaking Italian doesn't apply equally to all touristic destinations, but it's even a common joke in Italy that we in general suck at English. English teaching is overall pretty poor in Italy, although I don't think it's our exclusive issue in the area. I guess that since our countries are neighbour it's easy to expect tourist sector workers to just know our language?

I'm not an expert on any of these things so I could be wrong. This is just from my experience.

Also, as much as the shit that pours out of our prime minister's mouth sounds insane, like 30% of my country voted for her. So as much as it shames me to say it, I suppose 30% of the country agrees with at least most of her shit.

[spikeinthepunch]

if you told me a few years back i was gonna revive @single-malt-scotch and not drop it in a week and enjoy it genuinely i would have never imagined it. as much as i consume "cringe" content and enjoy things like hot wheels or barbie unironically, there has been a strangely complicated relationship between me and mcyt- for those who have only followed this blog (and even the one i had before this) youd have no idea i was incredibly involved with and enjoyed the old mcyt smp, mindcrack. after my early fandoms in 2010-2012 mindcrack was my thing, for years (the url of that side blog was what i used to have).

no matter how much i try to throw out the disclaimer "if you remember my mcyt days understand i was a teen and im not a weirdo about these people", the reason i even detached further and further over time wasn't purely that i fell out of it (i did, the server started to dwindle) but the.... shame in never wanting to look back at those days came from the automatic association people gained about mcyt over time, and tumblr's rampant witch hunting culture over calling people out for liking "problematic things".

should be said im talking about this shame and callout culture in the context of 2015 tumblr- to now. i was 16 and that stuff was ingrained in my head. it ruined my consumption and joy for media for years. i liked a lot of stuff without problem but i liked them all with intense, fear filled awareness to not unknowingly be ~bad~ but just touching something people could deem problematic. the moment i registered that my behavior as a 13 year old was "bad" bc i wrote mcyt fanfics was the moment i closed off all of that past and decided it was bad, and i was bad, and i could never ever look at it the same way again.

even as i stayed subbed to some of those people out of not wanting to let go of subs i made almost ten years ago- there was no way i was every going back i thought. i looked at mcyt fandom stuff and cringed, and that increased when the distaste of dreamsmp arose-- which ever valid to dislike dream, the wave of cringe culture over dreamsmp and the general concept of mc smps only furthered my shame in the last years. i was told even more in the present now, that mcyt fandom is Bad because its all weird people shipping real people and its strange and youre obviously bad for associating in any form at all. nuance in enjoying gamers on youtube was suddenly lost. even in that period of dsmp getting popular, i couldnt imagine myself getting to this point again, it really was so engrained in me to never consider mcyt a point of joy for myself, when my inability to do so was always tied to shame.

it sounds silly-- but applying this to a broader range of interests? it doesnt matter if im talking about mcyt or something else. it was so hard for me to decide in my head that there was nothing morally egregious about watching people play fucking minecraft on youtube. even if i draw fan art. even if i indulge in the characters they play in a way that isnt strange or crossing their personal boundaries. im not sure what happened to make people decide "mcyt" was a catch all for the Worst of the bad examples for people within such a large community but the moment that happened it made it so hard to feel like i was allowed to like this ever again. i made my existing sideblog in the early summer and i didnt say anything about it. i had it for months and i said nothing. i was so afraid of considering i might have fun, and find joy in this, i wanted to make sure if i destroyed it, it wasnt tied to here and there were no strings attached.

i slid away to enjoy this in peace. and im glad i did in the sense i took away any stressors of just posting straight to my main with little time to decide my feelings. but through the last months i have on and off added it to my pinned post. added it because fuck it, took it down because anxiety. back up, i have nothing to lose.... back down because i saw some post that made me feel bad again.

i am tired of it. the effect of early tumblr culture stress hangs over me even still and it fucking sucks. ive sat here drawing stuff for months on this sideblog unable to tie it to my name for reasons that dont even make sense, out of fear of a reaction from people id never regard or listen to in the first place. that being said im keeping that blog, its on my pinned, im queueing the art to post here whenever i share it, and taking all my old DA art out of storage was a big one to covercome as it uplocked all my old mcyt art to the public again even stuff i felt the most shame for-- by no means was this fandom what it was when i enjoyed it with 30 other people on tumblr 10 years ago... but im finding joy in this again, and my heart swells for every old mutual i see again and im not denying myself that anymore.

[donutdisturblivball]

re: the recent twoset video— pls ignore and dont read under the cut if u dont want any spoilers!

content warnings: mentions of suicide, homophobia, and racism. also— this is a LONG post.

ok so like i got a little worried at first because they imitated the try g*ys set up in the beginning which couldve gone really wrong because the try g*ys handled that situation REALLY WELL and im sick of seeing them be shamed or made fun of for it (SNL skit and NYT article) but it really delved into the hate THEY faced after dropping sell out and a bunch of the comments and DMs they showed were really hateful (some of them were homophobic, others telling them to kill themselves, and there were some that were racist which was really weird bc the groups they support r asian too??? so idk i dont really get those ones) and it’s honestly really clear that thats not even the worst of the hate they received… its just really sad and messed up.

i didnt expect that twoset would address the issue again after the ll40hrs episode we got a day or two ago, but im really glad they did. its oftentimes that overly obsessed fandoms (not just kp0p, tho those fandoms r definitely the more well known ones) can get really really hateful, and in the process they cross a lot of lines and are unapologetic about it. no matter how you twist it, nothing gratifies you with the right to tell others to kill themselves, or to threaten their families. you dont get to call others faggots, and you dont get to make fun of others because of how they look or their race. no one deserves that kind of fear or tasteless hate, no matter what they’ve done. you cant justify that sort of behavior— if who you’re “standing up for” believes that sort of behavior is okay, then a) their morals are WAY out of place, and b) maybe you shouldn’t be standing up for someone who thinks its okay to tell others to off themselves (not saying that bp or anyone condones their fans behavior, just saying that as a fact in general). im nearly 100% sure that whoever ur standing up for would think it to be disgusting and disappointing to know that their supporters are the types of people to wish bodily and mental harm onto others for reasons that aren’t justifiable.

i know for a fact that the people who do these types of things r a minority of the fandom, at least in most cases. it’s just that that minority is so loud that the normal parts of the fandom get drowned out, but its the fact that that minority can be heard and can be/is harmful to others that’s really messed up. i know that not all kp0p fans are as bad as these ones, and i’m friends with a lot of kp0p stans and i know for a fact that they would shame this behavior, but the way that the loud minority has decided to act and continues to act has completely tarnished the name of being a kp0p stan. i know it’s like a “joke” to say stuff like “oh you cant say that, the stans will come for you!” but the thing is that it’s not a joke. you really have to be careful of what u say or else those “stans,” that small but vocal minority will literally come for you.

it’s just so disheartening to see this behavior repeated again and again. you dont know this person’s situation, and you don’t know what they’re going through. being told to kill themselves could totally just be someone’s last straw, and the people who perpetuated that might just celebrate that they got rid of another hater. that type of behavior isn’t normal, and the fact that it’s gone on for so many years atp despite being called out is just so… i don’t know how to describe it.

like— if the tables were turned, and it was the group you’re stanning who was getting harassed by deranged fans, if they were being told to kill themselves, or if they were being called slurs that didn’t apply to them, or if they were being made fun of for the look of their eyes and the way they speak english, that behavior would be just as bad as the behavior that is constantly displayed against twoset and other people for jokes that are made, because it’s literally the same exact thing. if you wouldn’t do it to your faves, then don’t do it to anyone else. no matter if you care about them kr not, that behavior is disgusting and inexcusable in any situation.

going back to the OG video— i hope twoset is okay. they handled the situation really well, i think, and while it doesn’t really seem as though the comments and DMs got to them as much, i still really hope that theyre okay and that they know they’ve got people who love and care about them. i also can’t really imagine my best friend saying all those hurtful things to me, even if i know it’s fake. personally, thats just me and im honestly like— super sensitive (lol) but i also hope that brett and eddy filmed that, then went out and got lots of bubble tea and fried chicken together and just reminded each other abt how much they care and that in any real situation, nothing could come to them calling those each other those things irl (whether that would be a verbal or non verbal confirmation is up to u).

anyway, thats all for this long post lmao.. cheers to twoset and once again im SUPER PROUD of their 4mil stream (deffo not over it at ALL!) and just them in general. i’ve been following them for a few years ish now and just seeing how far theyve come is so 🥹🥹🥹 i hope they continue to make me smile and laugh with many new videos and projects to come. :)

edit; ​coming back here just to clarify i wrote most of this in a pretty emotional state and there r some things abt the video im more than a little iffy on lol but i dont really wanna get into that rn 😭 maybe another post or maybe never ill come back to it

[suenitos]

hello, what does critblr mean? /genq

im going to take this at face value and assume you asked this for an actual genuine reason even though i dont really know why you asked Me in particular also since i didnt see like any discussion about this on my dash today... tldr its like the leak/doxxed info part of leaktwt and the insanely overcritical part of r/dwt2 combined a little but unlike those places they have shooters and defenders on here for some fucking reason. theres definitely more to it than that that people do which i personally dont agree with or condone but here's a good post explaining how to spot someone who is a "part" of it.

also, just to add on a little on how to sus someone out, blank blogs with following on that clearly have people from there are generally red flags. talking about knowing more private/exclusive info about ccs isnt generally suspicious on its own especially if you only know it unwillingly (like last names photos or addresses etc) but it invites a lot of weird shit into your space (and others' space! no one here exists in a vacuum) to brag or even post about it so i dont recommend putting that shit in your fics or fic recs, or talking about it at length/posting if you get asks about things the majority of the general public does not know about for example. AGAIN im reiterating that knowing this stuff on its own doesnt inherently make someone a part of it or even makes them a bad person, but publicly posting about it INVITES and has the possibility to invite unsavory stuff to the whole community. no shame in not knowing but be mindful if someone tells you someone is a part of that, take it seriously, and try not to interact with anyone who openly says they are and the people they interact with generally (would also recommend blocking as well). as a final note although i could say a lot more i normally also wouldnt answer this but i do think it's important to discuss as a psa especially for newer folks just to be cautious and understand that there's freaks here too sadly

[kozykricket]

some more minecraft thoughts (unorganized AF wow)

yknow, i think a lot of people kinda forget like... how daunting game or.. really any media creation can be, with Scope in general, and generally making something requires some things to be cut, in order to like, say... focus on the main plot of a movie, instead of getting caught up on trying to do Everything Good. to focus on the strengths and do them Great... instead of opening up more cans of worms now you apply that to minecraft, where its whole strength is that there IS so much to do, its strength IS that it has like, everything... and really its no wonder they... have some difficulties developing it sometimes

well, yknow, ironically they have to cut things, but thats because they want to do everything Great instead of just Okay, but they also at the same time want to... do everything, which will ultimately take quite a while. to do everything that they could do...

in a game like minecraft, the backlog is endless, and figuring out what to prioritize is definitely a MASSIVE factor for like... well, lets take fireflies. of course they wanted to do fireflies, and to update more biomes to be more pretty. you see how joyous the devs sounded talking about that stuff?? of course they want it just as much as we do. but ... to open up a can of worms that is a whole mob that they want to do justice (even a mob as "simple" as fireflies) is to uh, put a bit much on their plate, considering they were already working on a lot of their backlog and had opened a massive can of worms with the ancient cities... and then you also factor in the Marketing and Stuff that wants them to get the update out ideally for around the summer and... to move on to the next update and... agh i guess what im tryna say is like, people seem to sometimes act like gamedevs cut things because they ... dont want to bother working. but its almost always priorities and scope. Of course mojang wants minecraft to be the best it can be, to have so many lovely wonderful things.

im sure if they never got any more ideas or suggestions for the game, they'd still have enough ideas to last until like, 1.80 if not higher.

so i imagine its quite tough for them, too, to have to say no to certain things because it... isnt relevant to open up certain cans of worms.

and that is, i believe, why you see them adding wolf variants now. it is strategic to finally yoink them out of the backlog (because surprise, the backlog is far more than just mob vote losers) because the armadillo makes them relevant. im not a huge fan of loosely connecting features like... armadillos to wolves. its kinda weird. but it does mean that that one mob winning gives them an opportunity to also add wolf variants and have that be... efficient in that it isnt opening up a brand new can of worms -- the can of worms of Wolves was already starting to open when they added wolf armor. is this to say wolves are done? of course not. nothing in minecraft is ever Done. and thats another reason its so hard to prioritize things. they want to add new things, and they want to improve old things. its a tough balance since... so many communities want DIFFERENT things out of the game

so it can end up seeming like they really dont add much... because. think of it like a pizza. someone bakes a really nice mixed pizza for a party, yet you... only get one or two slices that you really like. thats a shame. but that doesnt mean they didnt put a tonna work into baking it. the other pieces are being enjoyed by other people. people who, quite frankly, dont care about your slices.

i guess this post is kind of all over the place, but this is all to say... priorities and strategic development, as laaame as it may be to admit, is ultimately what mojang is going for, for both longevity and for quality. not to say theyre perfect. i wish they did armadillos a bit differently, and i wish we didnt have to wait for wolves to come up in relevance via a Shiny New Feature for them to be subtly tweaked... same as signs coming into relevance when they add hanging signs, so they add editing sign text as a feature.

i think ill... rewrite this post. its more of just a bunch of thoughts that arent super cohesive since theres just so many of them. ironic considering a big part of this posts sentiment is that for creation of many things, you should probably focus on the already good parts, instead of stretching it to do Everything Ever.

its. its just a lot of topics that i think are interesting.

respect to mojang for all the work they do. even if i dont agree with some of their implementations