#and however many other last names this dude has

[clawedthorns]

summer activities include having gender epiphanies with your bro

[moodymisty]

Author's Note: Inspired by this post. You can blame all of the unhinged horniness there for this unhinged horniness. Someone there put the idea down as space wolves or Luna wolves and I chose Luna wolves because @bispecsual gave me the brain rot. And since I'm a massive masochist, I write.

Relationships: Like five unnamed Luna Wolves/Fem!Reader

Warnings: Vaguely NSFW, Very hornily charged bullying, Astartes are very curious and grabby, Demeaning speech, Just imagine you're that one girl on the couch in the meme surrounded by massive dudes but those dudes are 8 foot tall genetic abominations, Gangbang implications(?) my warning tags are getting weird as fuck

To the Luna Wolves, serfs are a new idea- a curiosity.

But after their good deeds upon a planet of little known renown and placement in the galaxy, a few of their population offered to serve them.

Before them, most serfs were primarily stationed on Terra, and on Luna Wolves ships instead those roles were given to low ranking tech priests, or penal labor. Even then however the Astartes saw them rarely, until now.

Some of the newly conquered planet offered sons as aspirants, of which they eagerly accepted. The Luna Wolves have been eager to grow their numbers now under Horus’ leadership.

Others, older and ablebodied, offered themselves to serve as serfs.

Many Luna Wolves can't remember the last time they've seen a normal human for more than a few moments, ushering them to safely into a Stormbird or pushing them from a firefight. Or seeing their corpse flung on the far reaches of a battlefield, out of sight and mind.

In their brief periods of reprieve from battle, it's now been a struggle for their captains and lieutenants to keep their men on task, now that serfs scurry around them completing various tasks. Particularly for the youngest marines among them, it's been a constant to stop them from reaching towards the serfs, interrupting their sanctioned duties.

They will get to you once finished with your brothers, is what the current quartermaster on duty or Astartes captain says. Though haste to have their armor cleaned or bolter clips loaded isn't the thing on their mind, but instead an almost dog-like curiosity.

But after their superiors leave, they always end up crowding around you again. These astartes have barely seen baseline humans in decades, let alone a woman.

It's suffocating.

You were nothing on your home planet. Insignificant. You’d hoped joining them would bring you purpose, something to be proud of. And to get off the planet that had you feeling so trapped. And while you got your wish, in a way the thing trapping you had merely changed form.

They have you cornered in the armoring room now; Like Wolves. You went from trapped on that no name planet to trapped by five different astartes. Your palms feel hot and sweaty, but not as hot as your face.

“You’re so small, you’re going to get lost on the ship,” One says.

He grabs for your chin and holds it for a moment, forcing you to look into his grey eyes. they're stoic, but you can see he's enjoying something about this. Though he allows you to shrink away and out of his grip, looking downward at their chest armor. Or anywhere else that isn't their faces.

“Or trampled,” Says another. The one who spoke previous gives him a sour look before passively aggressively replying.

“We’ll make sure that doesn’t happen.”

One who hasn't spoken yet has his top armor removed, his lower half unpowered. He was training, using it as dead weight. Training concluded blood now drips down from his nose and lips but is mostly dried, partly covered healing bruises. If he looks like this, you can't help but wonder how his opponent looks.

It’s distracting.

You don’t know if it’s some sort of illness or insanity from being locked in this ship for so long; It makes him look more attractive. You hope to whatever deity or god or whatever exists out in the stars that he doesn't notice you’re staring. That he doesn't notice the way your heart is pounding in your chest and what feels like your cunt as well.

He does. As do the others. You can't kid yourself and think that with their hearing and smell that they haven't noticed that you're boiling alive, and that your body is screaming fuck me fuck me fuck me fuck me-

“He won. Out of one hundred men.”

Your gut twists and the marine behind you laughs quietly. It's deep, enough so that you swear you can feel it in your chest. You would squeeze your thighs together for some relief, but you don’t think you can without stumbling over.

“She likes the winners. Looks like you’re out.” He gestures to a fellow marine that gives him another sour look. You briefly wonder what he lost at to deserve such a jab.

“I should return to my duties,”

You meekly say, hoping to remove yourself from the embarrassment and scurry away to another quarter of the ship.

One of them blocks your path and traps you from leaving, picking you up by the armpits and holding you before putting you back down between them all. It's like you weigh nothing to them, and that they can simply jostle and swing you around like a toy.

“I’ll tell your quartermaster you were helping us.” He jerks his head in the direction of a marine clad in only the casual clothing they wear out of their ceramite. Now the focus of your attention he rolls his shoulder, and you can see the muscles of his neck and around his collarbone flex.

You swallow a knot in your throat that felt like it was going to choke you. Your hands clench tight, nails sharp against your palms. You're going to have a heart attack, you swear it. Tears well in your eyes but they don't break your waterline just yet, from sheer will alone. If any of them say another word, call you cute, small, soft, that you smell so sweet, you swear they’ll roll down your cheeks like a waterfall.

“He wants you to put on his armor. The others are always so rough, you’re so gentle with those little hands.”

The marine reaches for you, and in your back step you stumble and accidentally bump into the one who hasn't spoken at all; Just watching and sitting. You stumble over his massive armored boot and end up falling into a sit on his thigh, legs parted over it. His massive armored hand comes to grip your waist, to keep you from falling over. It covers a good portion of your stomach in the process.

You’re so tightly wound just the simple pressure alone is enough to have you clamp a hand your mouth to avoid letting out a moan that would kill you right then and there, if you weren’t already dead. Your knees quiver, toes just barely touching the ground. His massive height makes it impossible to fully stand with his thigh between your legs.

You know they can smell the way you’re leaking and staining your underwear, hear the way your heart is racing like it's going to explode. You’re half afraid you might make his ceramite thigh plate slick.

You can feel their eyes on you. They look at you like you’re food thrown to a pack of starving wolves.

One suddenly steps forward, and pushes his battle brother out of his way with a harsh slam of ceramite on ceramite before undoing the latch his belt.

“I go first.”

[archetypal-archivist]

I think one of the points that stood out to me about Quackity's statement is how professional it sounded and how he knew exactly how to move forward in a situation like this, despite how messy it is. It was short, it was to the point, it was without extraneous excuses or emotion, and it emphasized what went wrong and how he will fix it. End statement.

And I think something that jumped out to me is that- Quackity's trained in this. The dude went to law school. He could probably look at this mess and pick out what HR laws were broken, if any, and how it would be compensated in court, which in turn means he can then go and do that compensating. The statement sounds formal and trustworthy because I bet Quackity's had to do debate-style speeches and public speaking classes. He likely studied so he can put together a statement like this that would hold water in the court of public opinion. Maybe with the intent that such skills would be for a client, yeah, but it still carries over here, which is damn good because the QSMP mess is flaming harder that the 2020s dumpster fire merch tumblr started selling a while back.

I'm fairly certain the QSMP will survive this and with streamers like Badboyhalo and dedicated admins who love their jobs like Richas (Pomme and Richas have both told the audience in QnA segments on Bad's streams not to tell them to sleep, they know what they're doing), we'll be getting content in the interim while things are worked out, too. But I don't think we'll be reaching the level of popularity the QSMP had a few months back. Late 2023 to early 2024 has been nothing but blow after blow to the server, first with purgatory 1, then Forever, the backlash and horrible racism against the Brazilians and the targeting of Cellbit in particular, then Wilbur, then this... Yeah. I don't see the server escaping unscathed from this, there'll forever be drama tied to its name which is the last thing Quackity wanted from his project.

However, people love this whole thing. It's done what it's set out to do and created many genuine friendships and economic opportunities for the CCs. It's Quackity's passion project, a love carried to many other CCs, not to mention the fans. It's too beloved to die completely and given how long the admins stuck it out despite the working conditions, I genuinely think that most of the good members of the cast and crew will be sticking it out for the long haul. We just have to be patient and cautiously hopeful.

[joeshiestyslover]

tennessee whiskey- c. sturniolo

pairing: chris sturniolo x countrygirl!reader

summary: working at a bar in texas to make some extra money for college is far from interesting, with you mostly serving drunk college kids and random middle-aged men. however, one night a certain set of triplets walk into the bar, and one of them in particular catches your eye.

warnings: cursing, alcohol use, use of nicknames (playboy, cowgirl, baby)

masterlist

lowercase intended

working at a bar has it's fair share of ups and downs. sure, you get hit on by creepy men and desperate frat guys, but it pays well and you get free drinks.

you began working at the crown and anchor pub for the past two years, since you got to college at the university of texas. you honestly enjoy your job. your coworkers are nice enough and the patrons aren't awful, many of them being fellow college students.

you grew up in about thirty minutes out of austin on a ranch filled with horses, pigs, cows, chickens, and basically every farm animal. it's not like you're not used to the city, but if you're being honest, you much prefer the quiet and serene rural areas to the busy and bustling cities.

when you moved to austin permanently for college, it was a little bit of a culture shock. you were used to rodeos and horseback riding instead of large buildings and loud concerts. but after a while, you began to adjust. you started going out more, making friends, and, of course, getting a job at the bar that sits right on the corner of the university of texas.

tonight is relatively the same to all the previous ones. you're in your work outfit which consists of a black tank top and short denim shorts with your cowboy boots. you've been pouring drinks all night, and occasionally turning down random frat boys. suddenly, you see three identical guys sit down at your side of the bar. you immediately take notice of one of them. he's the only one with no tattoos and noticeably longer hair which is covered by a light blue backwards baseball cap.

you allow yourself to admire him for a few seconds before walking over to the three boys, "hi, welcome in. can i get you boys something to drink?" the triplets look up at you, chris immediately looking you up and down. "what would you recommend?" nick asks. "well depends what you're looking for. you want a beer? dark liquor? something fruity?" you reply. chris takes a second and scans the brands of beer lined up behind you. "i'll take a michelob ultra please." you nod and grab a pint glass, going over to the tab and pouring the beer into it. you set it down in front of him before looking over at the other two triplets. "umm can i get a tequila sunrise?" nick requests with a small smile on his face. "of course." you look to matt. "i'll just have a coke please." you then begin to prepare both the boys' drinks before setting them in front of them. "anything else i can get you guys?" you inquire. chris looks you up and down once again before responding, "yeah i was wondering if i could get your name?" he smirks at you. "y/n." you say. “pretty name. i’m chris.” he responds. “thanks. it’s nice to meet you chris.” you give him a small smile. before chris can say anything else, another patron at the bar signals for you to refill his beer. you turn back to chris, “excuse me.” you walk over to the man and grab his glass, refilling it. even after you’ve walked away, chris’ eyes never leave your figure. there’s just something so entrancing about you. “you’re staring.” his thoughts are broken by nick’s voice to his left. “what? no i’m not.” he tries to deny, but his older brother knows better than to believe it. “uh huh, sure.” he takes a sip of his drink. “dude, just ask for her number or something.” matt chimes in. “yeah don’t be a pussy. just ask her out. it’s not hard.” chris just rolls his eyes. “when’s the last time you’ve been on a date nick? like three years ago?” “shut up.”

after about ten minutes of the triplets arguing over whether or not chris should ask you out, you walk back over to the triplets to check on them and talk to chris “how are you guys doing over here?” chris’ head immediately shoots up at the sound of your voice. before he can speak, nick does. “we’re doing great, but my brother has something to ask you.” chris’ eyes widen as nick and matt give him a sly smile. you raise an eyebrow as chris turns his head back to you. “well then ask away.” he’s silent for a few seconds “what time do you get off?” “i get off at 9:30. why do you ask?” chris’ confidence slowly begins to make a reappearance when he asks, “i was wondering if you wanted to do something. with me.” you tilt your head slightly, “you wanna take me out on a date, playboy?” a smirk slowly appears on his face, “yeah. i wanna take you out on a date if you’ll let me.” you ponder it for a few seconds. “i guess i’ll see you at 9:30 then, playboy.” you say before walking away to tend to other people at the bar. nick sends him a small smirk and drinks his tequila sunrise. “see? that wasn’t so hard.” “nick, seriously, shut the fuck up.”

soon enough, 9:30 rolls around and you’ve been cleaning glasses and wiping down the bar for the past half hour. you quickly go into the back to clock out and grab your bag before going back to the front to meet chris. “you ready to go, playboy?” he nods, “lead the way, y/n.” you exit the bar and walk towards your truck in the parking lot, chris trailing behind you. “so where are we going?” he asks curiously. “you’ll see” you respond as you climb into the drivers seat. “you’re really just not gonna tell me?” “i said you’ll see. it’ll be worth it.” you begin to drive out from the parking lot onto the street. 

as you’re driving, you speak up, “so where are you from? it’s obvious you’re not from around here.” chris turns to face you with a raised eyebrow, “you could tell, huh?” you nod, “yeah. i’m good at that.” he gives you a small smirk “well, me and my brothers live in la, but we’re originally from boston. what about you?” “i grew up around here actually. on a ranch.” his eyebrows shoot up. “really? a ranch? so you have like animals?” you nod, “yep. every farm animal you can think of, we have it.” “i’ll have to see it sometime.” you shoot him a smirk, “how about now?” you ask as you pull into the driveway of your family’s ranch. “you’re gonna show me your animals?” you park the truck as you shut off the engine, “well, most of them are probably asleep right now, but i can show you my horses if you’re up for it.” chris nods, “yeah let’s go.” he opens the door and gets out and you follow suit, locking the truck as you walk towards the side of the house.

you lead him over to the stables and open the door, revealing two horses. “whoa. are they both yours?” he asks with wide eyes. “this is maverick and that's goose. maverick’s mine and goose is my sister’s.” you tell him, walking over to maverick and petting him. “when i was younger, me and maverick used to participate in rodeos together.” you smile fondly at the memories of you riding maverick in an arena. “so you’re like a real cowgirl then?” he asks, admiring the way you tend to your horses. “i guess i am.” you give him a soft smile, which he returns. “there’s more to you than meets the eye, cowgirl.” he says softly. “same to you, playboy.” you respond. “you keep calling me that. why?” you shrug, “i don’t know it just suits you.” he chuckles, “whatever you say cowgirl.” you playfully roll your eyes at the nickname. “you wanna pet him? he’s real sweet.” you offer as chris takes a step towards maverick. he slowly brings his hand up and begins to pet the horse. “he is sweet.” “i know. i’ve had him since i was 13.” he looks over at you, “so he’s basically your baby, huh?” you smile slightly, “yeah he is.” 

after a few minutes, the two of you decide to head back to your apartment. the drive back is peaceful with the two of you making casual conversation by talking about your families, your goals, and anything you could think of. after about thirty minutes of driving, you pull into the parking garage of your apartment complex. you put your truck in park and step out, heading towards the elevator then to your front door. 

the two of you enter your cozy apartment and you set your bag and keys down on the kitchen counter. “this is a nice place. very homey.” you shrug, “it’s not much, but it’s alright. it’s what i can afford.” you walk into the living room and chris follows you, sitting himself down on your couch. “you want a drink or something?” you ask as you turn on your tv. “sure. i’ll take whatever you got.” “you got it. i’ll be right back.” before you go, you open spotify on your tv and click on a random playlist and press shuffle, the song ‘tennessee whiskey’ by chris stapleton softly coming through the speakers. you walk into the kitchen and begin to make some drinks for you and chris when suddenly, you feel two arms wrap around your waist. the two of you begin to sway slowly to the music. you turn around and wrap your arms around his neck as his hands fall to your hips. “you have a good taste in music, cowgirl.” he says. “you don’t strike me as the type to like country music.” “i don’t but i might make an exception for this song. after all, you introduced me to it.” he smiles as he leans in to press his forehead against yours. “am i already making that big of an impact on you, playboy?” you tease. “baby, you’ve had an impact on me since i laid eyes on you in that bar a few hours ago.” his words make you smile. “yeah?” chris smiles back at you as he leans in closer, “yeah” he confirms before closing the gap in between you. the kiss is soft and sweet and you can taste the faint remnants of beer on his lips. his tongue then darts out, running along your bottom lip. you open your mouth slightly, letting your tongues dance together. your hands move to his hair and you give a small tug, a soft groan escaping his lips as his hands run along your waist. after a couple seconds, he pulls away, his lips slightly red and swollen. “you mind if i stay the night?” “as long as you promise to not ditch me in the morning, playboy.” you say. “oh cowgirl, after tonight, i’m never letting you go.” he then crashes his lips to yours once again before picking you up and wrapping your legs around his waist. he begins to carry you into your bedroom, the drinks long forgotten. 

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not helping my family pay for hospital bills?

🎷🔥 so i can find it later

This is going to need a lot of context right off the bat. I (20'sM) am a gay man that comes from an extremely conservative family. My sister (20'sF) is also a lesbian and recently got married and adopted a child. I'm very proud of her, but that's not the issue.

My parents seem to have little to no issue with my sister marrying a woman. They do have a very big issue with me liking dudes, however. Like, it was the reason my parents got divorced "big issue." I'm not gonna go into everything, but my sister ended up with my dad and I stayed with my mom for reasons I'd rather not share.

Our last parting was on... less than decent terms. Upon finding out that I was of the homosexual variety, my dad flipped his lid. He called me several slurs and said some other very hurtful things, and even made moves to physically attack me. My mom, also a very homophobic woman, stepped in and thankfully talked him down. Then divorce, etc etc.

I saved up enough money to move out when I turned 18 and may have done some impulsive things including completely trashing my mom's bathroom, which I know I'm definitely the asshole for, but in my defense my mom kept "forgetting" to pick up my prescriptions and I was manic (I have bipolar). But, again, I know I'm the AH for that.

I now live with my two best friends R (20sNB) and P (20sM) in a house we all pay for. R comes from money so they help out a lot, and I love them both to death. We kind of have a sort of situationship but none of us are poly? Idk it's weird we're just going with it rn.

Anyway, I bring them up bc we all went to my sister's wedding together, and my parents separately chewed me out for bringing them (and for R daring to wear a dress. They're amab for context) and I obviously argued back bc hey they're my best friends and my sister specifically said it was okay for me to bring them (she and R are also friends and they wouldve been invited regardless of me bringing P) and also because R looks very good in a dress and i can handle them shit-talking me but i will not tolerate slander towards R or P.

At the wedding, I went full no contact with them and told them to lose my number. They, ofc, did Not lose my number and I got several calls from extended family saying about what you would expect them to say, so I switched numbers and gave only my sister and her wife my new number.

My sister. I love her to pieces but sometimes she gets on my nerves. She gives my number to my mom to have "just in case," but she reassures me that she won't give it to my dad or any other family. So far, she's made good on that promise, I just have to deal with periodic calls about getting a girlfriend and having kids.

Now, my dad isn't the healthiest guy out there. He has arthritis, osteoporosis, and several other things that i don't really wanna get into. As he's aged he's only gotten worse and there have been several times he's almost died, but recently he's been put on hospice and has an estimated Not Very Long to live.

Here's where I may be the AH. My dad calls me while I'm at a very important, personal event for R (he got my number from my mom) and goes on a long rant on how I'm an unlovable disgrace and how he fed me and clothed me and I could make up for all that by helping him pay off hospital debt. I say no immediately and tell him that he's never been my dad, only my dna donor, and that he's going to be dead anyway and that selling his house could cover all the bills. He calls me many more names and tells me he wishes I was never born (calling my mom some very derogatory names too (she's asian)) and that i should just go ahead and off myself to save the world someone like me. I tell him he should die faster while he's at it because God knows the world already has enough bigots in it and there could never be too many mentally ill queers.

I hung up, but now I'm thinking I went a bit too far. AITA for not helping out with his hospital bills and yelling at him?

What are these acronyms?

[ghost-bxrd]

I’ve been getting really into magical stuff recently and also DC so I’m just gonna drop this here:

Fae Dick Grayson

F A E

okay so fae stories are special to me because I grew up on hearing pagan folklore and fairytales about fae and fae adjacent creatures as good night stories so hooo boy yes I adore that trope! (I mean, I made Dick a Banshee in my fic Shuck so… hehe)

Anyway, Fae Dick Grayson! There’s just so many things you can do with it ✨

Robin appears from one day to the next, following in Batman’s shadow like a mischievous sprite, so honestly rumors have been going wild about him since day one. Robin actually being something non-human doesn’t really come as a surprise!

The fae folk are known for being awfully good at blending in with regular humans when they put their mind to it, the only thing that puts them apart (in most stories) is their otherworldly beauty, and Dick Grayson? Well, he’s definitely got that in abundance.

Just sometimes, when the light reflects off a surface in just the right way, when someone pours a glass of water and you happen to look right through the spray, or when you think you catch a glimpse of something out of the corner of your eye and you spin around— but there’s only Dick Grayson, even if a second ago you could have sworn you saw eyes where there weren’t supposed to be any; colors that aren’t supposed to exist; feathers where only skin has any right to be.

And, gods, all the talking. Dick is terrifyingly good at talking to people without actually saying anything, to the point where you walk away from the conversation feeling utterly drained after spilling your entire life story but when you think back on it— you can’t remember him ever telling you anything about himself. You know there were the usual pleasantries of “hi” and “nice to meet you” and “how are you doing?” but anything beyond that just kinda… seemed to spill out of you? It’s very strange. It’s very unnerving. By the end of the evening you other convince yourself you’re overreacting or you simply push the incident out of your mind altogether.

And there’s another thing about Dick. His name.

He only ever introduces himself as Dick Grayson/Robin. Never Richard. Never. Especially not Richard John. Names are sacred for the fae folk, names have power, so while Richard John Grayson may not be Dick’s true name, he treats it as such to honor his parents. None are allowed to use it. None except Bruce or Alfred on special occasion.

Of course, Dick’s “true” name isn’t exactly a secret so when someone does happen to use it… well, Dick may be… other… but he’s still intrinsically good in a way many of his kind don’t have the patience to be. Dick judges on a case by case basis, just like his parents and Bruce taught him. And usually people do not mean it maliciously when they use his name so he kindly corrects them and that’s that. But oh man, if they still insist on calling him “Richard”? Well..

“Oh no, it seems your credit card is being declined, sir!”

“Sheesh, you tripped over a root? In Gotham?!”

“What do you mean ten birds flew into your window last night? You live on floor level!”

“Dude I’m telling you that rash doesn’t look normal.”

“I… don’t think crows are supposed to follow you like that.”

It’s little things (most of the time, unless you really pissed Dick off) but they keep piling up, slowly driving you insane. You feel like you’re being watched, but it’s just a bird sitting on the window sill again. You feel like someone moved all your furniture just slightly to the right even tho you checked all the cameras.

The fae are kind, but they are also vindictive when crossed.

(Thanks to Bruce, however, I think Dick’s bouts of “vengeance” rarely go much farther than that though.)

Dang ok that ended up being an entire rant… wow. Anyway, yeah. Fae.

[hooman-tree]

The Overthinking Embodiment Of Anxiety / Leo x Gender Neutral ! Reader .

THERE WERE MANY TIMES THAT LEO WOULD GRIMACE AND SHRIVEL UP INTO HIS OWN EMBODIMENT OF EMBARRASSMENT. But, him asking for [Name's] number in the stupidest way possible has got to be at the very top of his list. That was pretty much the only thing circling through his head, as he was currently screaming into his pillow profusely. Which was luckily muffled out.

He was currently freaking out, because somehow: Leo just happened to not only fail at leaning against the locker to the ‘awesome rizz’ he claims to have, as school today. But, he also couldn’t stop himself from stammering over his words.

In all honesty, he was one second away from puking onto [Name]. However, a quick: “I’m gonna…gonna be sick. I’ll be in the bathroom, if you need me!” managed to only further embarrass Leo, as he wasn’t able to meet up with [Name] for the rest of that day and apologise profusely for what it did.

Right now, he was still screaming urgently into his pillow, until Raph threw a pillow at him and urged him to ‘shut it up, and go get some sleep’. It was almost 3AM, and his brothers couldn’t even use their phones properly in peace to just roam about the Internet, because Leo’s screaming was consistently ruining Donnie’s Attack On Titan binge-fest Marathon, Mikey’s podcast of his favourite comedians and Raph’s blasting music that he raised up to deafen himself from Leo’s stressed out antics.

Thankfully, Leo stopped his screaming session, as soon as he felt his phone vibrate and ping from a notification popping up. He didn’t really think much into it, thinking it to be a Netflix notification. But, him choking on his own spit just proved it wasn’t even that: [Name] had sent him a message.

Almost immediately, Leo was staring intently at his phone: hesitantly clicking the notification and his phone opened up onto the messaging app.

[Name]: wassup Leo, you good after puking and throwing up in the bathroom? 😭

Leo grimaced at the teasing message, rest his head onto his other pillow, an audible sigh left him, staring up at the ceiling. “They definitely laughed after that…” With a reluctant sigh, Leo responded back.

Leo: heya [Name] & i’m all chilled out now, thanks for asking! and, sorry about that 😕 i got nervous and freaked out there

[Name]: dw mate, it’s all good & hey, at least we can chat here and still laugh abt it together later on 👍

Leo blinked mildly, clutching the phone tightly to himself, his legs wiggled about for a mere second, not able to contain his excitement. A dazed grin appeared onto his face, happily and quickly responding to [Name].

Leo: that’s sound great & i was actually wondering about something i wanted to ask you @ school before, but couldn’t today 😶

[Name]: aight👌, shoot the question @ me then man

This was when Leo kept on constantly typing for a really-really long time, to then just delete major parts of his prolonged paragraph he was wounding up in the text box. He gritted his teeth and slanted them, a nerve-wracking feeling swelled up inside of him, before he finally deleted his whole paragraph and then sent:

Leo: it’s nothing, dw

goodnight, [Name]!

[Name]: goodnight dude!!

Leo sighed, turning off his phone and he laid comfortably on his bed. He felt immensely disappointed in himself for chickening out at the last moment. But, he then remembered:

He got [Name’s] number and even managed to chat with them for a good amount of time, without even sending any stupid typos he overthought on himself to make.

A sigh of relief whipped out of his mouth from that, smiling softly in his sleep. Leo was fine with just trying to go on a date hangout with [Name] again, next time.

He’d have better luck asking them out successfully, next time.

[anxious-lee]

|| Ramshackle Tickle Headcanons ||

A/N: just watched the pilot last night and read the comic this morning, I'm ready 💪. I can tell these three are gonna be my new beloved found family. as far as I can tell, there isn't a whole lot of fan content of this on tumblr so I'm really scared this is gonna find its way to the normies 😢

---

Vinnie

- chaotic ler

- usually the first one to initiate a tickle fight

- fights to WIN (and have fun with her friends)

- the roughest tickler of them all; squeezes, scribbles, and pokes anywhere and everywhere she can reach. she will the loudest laughter she can out of you

- skipp is her easiest lee; he'll start a chase and everything for the game of it, but he doesn't fight too hard once he gets caught

- stone, however, is the hardest lee, but we'll get to that later; despite how difficult he is to corner, she likes the challenge; besides, somebody's got to make sure that sad twig boi smiles

- once she finds your worst spot, she's not leaving

- teases with evil laughter and playful mockery; "no mortal can escape the clutches of the TICKLE MONSTER MWAHAHAHA!" "You wanna get away? You wanna get away?? Well you're not gettin' away~"

- when tickled, she SCREAMS and CACKLES but will NOT beg

- doesn't mind being tickled, doesn't love it; it's all in good fun

- ^ you wouldn't know that based on how hard she fights her ler; kicking, clawing, flailing, you name it; she does not like to lose

- in fact, she'd rather have her face turn purple than call it quits; the ler just has to know when to stop on their own because she's sure as hell not going to tell them

- most ticklish spot is her armpits

- do not try to outrun her because she is so damn persistent. she will catch you; tackles and pins you down before she tickles you

Skipp

- lawful lee

- has the goofiest little giggles in the world; a real "teehee" lad

- can't and won't hold back his laughter

- by far the happiest to be a lee

- actively likes tickling and WILL admit it

- most ticklish spot is his sides

- he can tickle if he thinks one of his friends needs it but he mainly prefers to be the lee

- doesn't wiggle that much; all the energy that would go into squirming goes into giggling instead

- cups his pink cheeks and gives tiny feet kicks 🥰

- will squeal if you tickle his neck

- a lot of teases don't work on him because they rely on being embarrassed, and he's not embarrassed about tickling

- the teases that DO work are baby talk, since it adds to the silly feeling

- pokes tickle him the most

- his giggly laughter is laced with mangled outcries; "HEHEHEHE WAITHEHEHE STO- HEHE NOT THERE HEHEHE"

- if skipp gets in stone's personal space one too many times, stone'll wreck him (he knows skipp is doing it on purpose)

- isn't that invested with winning or losing a tickle fight; he's just happy to be there

- tries to get stone to loosen up about tickling (explanation later)

- gets ganged up on by the other two the most

- falls for those old tickle tricks, not because he wants to get tickled, but because he is just so obliviously trusting

Stone

- HOOOO BOY

- the one we've all been waiting for

- I'm gonna let yall know right now this ones going to be the longest (SUE ME OKAY?!)

- neutral lee-leaning switch

- will swear up and down on his life that he's not ticklish (it's a lie!) until the other two little gremlins finally decide to prove him wrong

- he's very embarrassed about being ticklish; skipp doesn't understand why and tries to get him more comfortable with it, which causes stone to turtle-up and shut down the conversation; vinnie takes a less gentle approach and just tells him to "loosen up, dude!"; it seems like a childish thing to him, like something he should have grown out of

- despite how embarrassed he is about his weakness, he's not actually embarrassed about saying the word; he can say "tickle" all day long, he just can't admit he's ticklish

- he repeats the same three words everytime someone asks: "I'm not ticklish"

- if he thinks for even a second he's about to get tickled, he sprints like his life depends on it; this means the first ten times his friends have tried to tickle him, they failed, no matter how stealthy they were.

- finally, on try eleven, they managed to overtake him; he wouldn't laugh for the first two whole minutes; vinnie was straddling his waist while skipp kept him from kicking and bucking her off; eventually, he did crack; it only took a random squeeze at his death spot for him to slip up: his thighs; vinnie caught on right away and went to town, and then poor stone couldn't keep himself together; if he laughed any harder, he swore he'd crumble to pieces; his arms waved around, too jellied up to put any real force behind them; his eyes were still squeezed shut, but his smile was brighter than the motherfucking sun; it even put skipp's to shame; he looked uncharacteristically like a little baby, laughing and shrieking

- vinnie and skipp's eyes practically filled with stars; neither of them had ever seen this side of stone before; but that was about to change

- he can't claim he's not ticklish anymore, but he'll still go to any lengths to avoid talking about it

- stone didn't know he had a death spot until that moment, nothing ever came into contact with his thighs so he had no way to know

- his laugh is very high-pitched, differing from his usual deep rumble; pure belly laughter with a side of hiccups (no not hiccup laughs, ACTUAL hiccups. it's the cutest thing I swear)

- within thirty seconds of laughing, he's lost all ability to save face; cries out a lot of "please"s if vinnie goes hard enough

- the tops of his cheeks will go red while he's being tickled; not full tomato, but just enough to shatter his pride

- he's the most adorable lee 💓💓💓

- he is SO HARD TO CATCH THO

- he's got the reflexes of a cat

- doesn't like being teased, then he gets a little too embarrassed

- the only comments that ARE acceptable are ones of curiosity; like if skipp goes "hmmm I wonder if this spot is ticklish?" or vinnie says "dang bro I didn't know you could laugh that hard"

- if he's comfortable with anyone tickling him, it's skipp; he knows he can trust him to not laugh at him

- as much as he'll deny it, he doesn't hate tickling as much as he wishes; in fact, it might even be a little bit fun <3

- as a ler, he's pretty skilled

- where vinnie is a very rough and sloppy ler, stone is very careful and methodical

- starts with light traces to amp up the tension, then goes in for the kill

- tickles skipp the most, because there's a significantly smaller chance of skipp fighting back

- he tickles his friends in an older brother sort of way; mostly its when they're bugging him

- teases with "ya learnt your lesson yet?" "that doesn't sound like someone who wants me to stop tickling" "you were practically asking for it, being a pain in the arse and everything"

- specifically teases skipp because he knows he likes it; "having fun, down there? i can see that smile, mister, you ain't fooling me"

- most of the time though he'll just watch the other two tickle fight and watch boredly

----

IT TOOK A LOT OF RESTRAINT NOT TO RAMBLE

AND I DID ANYWAY!!!

I'll save the rest of my thoughts for potential fics

Hope you enjoy!

[corpseconvulsive]

Hi! My name is August and im here to address the rumors of Toby/Plague, a cosplayer and content creator being a groomer and other accusations made within the last few days

You may recognize my name from other posts made regarding myself and other rumors including the rumor that i am one of the people Toby is grooming, which is devastating in my eyes because never once has Toby acted in a predatory way towards me, he is truly one of the coolest dudes ever.

Why did this rumor start? Its because of one screenshot where i am describing that i am cold and toby makes a joke saying he will “wrap his feet around me” which was obviously a joke, wrapping your whole ass feet around someone is not even humanly possible?

I fully consent to the sexual and darker jokes and fully enjoy them as we use in private in our servers for just ourselves and friends watering our humor down in the Blood of Salvation server, Toby always makes sure to respect a boundary if it is brought to his attention, still TO THIS DAY i am asked at least twice a month sometimes even three times if my boundaries have changed, the only one being to not make fun of me for my weight as it makes me incredibly insecure, Toby has never broken that boundary. If people had an issue with our humor, we have always communicated in the server that they can message a moderator to discuss any issues, no one ever messaged us saying they felt uncomfortable.

I can address that our humor is quite sexual and dark to begin with, however if toby is not personally friends, he controls his humor ESPECIALLY around minors, there have been many occasions where Toby has mentioned he is kind of sick of minors joining the server just because they simp and suck up to him and how gross he feels when people act like that just because the find him hot.

Majority of the jokes made were in a chat where only the moderators and admins can talk which you can choose if you want the channel to be visible or not, all moderators who are close friends talk here, we didnt say many of the screenshots shown to random members although we should have been more careful with what we say as some people are incredibly young.

Also the way this was handled was horrendous, Seirei has a large platform that i stopped following a few months ago, her content was great in my eyes and i completely idolized her because she seemed really cool, however things like calling ticci toby an abuser and other drama that arised has caused me to stop following her. She should have handled it like an adult and talked to everyone mentioned to get both sides as some people involved are minors which is so dangerous seeing how people are being doxxed now, some involved are as young as 14. Seirei’s posts are in my eyes, the reason this stupid situation has gotten to the point people have begun doxxing Toby and others, this in my eyes, is terrible, even for the ones making up these rumors and statements that are being doxed as well. I have no respect for those making up these things about my friend, however i think everyone deserves the right to feel safe in there own home without worrying about there information being leaked and something happening to them.

I have messaged Seirei who said to message her if you have more information or input as it says on her tiktok, explaining that Toby is indeed not a fucking creep towards me, is definetly not grooming me as I know the signs I have been groomed twice in my life for long periods of time such as 2-3 years starting before i was even a teenager, and about screenshots and things said about me in general regarding an old situationship. Seirei has not acknowledged my message along with another friend who has messaged her for a simple question.

Regarding the things with my ex situationship, i do not know why it is being brought up as it was irrelevant to this however all i will say is yes i sent her nudes however she did happen to start sending them first and it was a common thing for us to act sexual with one another, also one of the people who happens to be making accusations about Toby has told me i must not have sexual trauma if i sent nudes to her when I admitted i was a victim of sa and grooming which is a horrible thing to say to any victim to disregard what happened to them, it is not right and vile to do that to any victim no matter what abuse they have trauma and scars from, especially when some have developed hypersexuality from the trauma such as myself.

I would also like to discuss how these people accusing toby are hypocritical as well, they act like they have not done similar things while they have.

Robin, someone who started this mainly from what i know, loves to simp and support Jimmy Urine, who if you dont know who that is, he is a giant pedophile and was the singer of MSI(Mindless Self Indulgence). He has been charged with sexual battery against minors and they fully support this man and call him hot and basically drool all over him.

Virus is a person Toby used to be friends with before i came into the picture, a minor who said sexual shit and has wrote multiple in depth paragraphs about wanting to do sexual things with Toby as a minor before Toby finally kicked him from the server and blocked him entirely due to the shit he was saying. When i became friends with Toby I had heard stories about Virus as the server was still below 100 members(believe i was the 96th member after i messaged Toby asking if he had a server since his discord was on his IG) so the server was a close tight knit group with the moderators and there friends before it was opened for the public. After making it public Virus made MULTIPLE TikTok accounts and Discord accounts to join the server after being banned for his weird actions, how do we know? Because this dude kept posting art in his style, I was one of the people who analyzed the art as I am an artist myself, the eyes, nose, face shape, style, is all the same. He even presented us with a fake tiktok account, it was him in a red curly wig, same background as his other tiktoks. He is obsessed and seems to come back at least once every month or two.

Many others have made r34 of characters which is gross, like i mentioned before told me i couldnt have been sa’d and groomed if i sent nudes, someone tried accusing me that i was an adult talking to my situationship who is a minor despite the fact that my ex situationship was older than me, accused Toby of asking a minor to show him their tits as a joke meanwhile the “minor” i question is our friend Kat who is 23 so definetly a minor, people have called moderators who do there job mean, saying its wrong that we “shit talk” members meanwhile we only “shit talk” members if youre being stupid and we think its a possibility youll break the rules and start shit meanwhile these people accusing toby have servers and gcs on discord made for the purpose of shitting on Toby, myself, and other members of the staff in the crp server, and a bunch of other stuff.

As you can see, the list goes on with how hypocritical these people are, using things out of context to try and get the point across when all they are doing is lying to paint Toby in a bad light, its disgusting how they accuse Toby of being a groomer when this is who happens to be accusing him. Again to the rumor Toby is grooming me, i can fully state that no he is not grooming me, he has never acted romantically in any shape or form with me, he has never acted predatory towards me or any others, I mean if I dont text him, my dms are drier than the sahara desert with that man, hes not one to text first so sometimes i go a day or two without actually speaking to him. I know the signs of being a groomer from experience and research, Toby is not grooming myself or any others and its bullshit that people are accusing him based on messages taken out of context.

Thank you for reading🖤🖤❤️❤️

[b4mpyre-k1zz3s]

Rules of the Harem

Y/N lives a life not many women can say they have: she spends her days in a luxurious, gothic mansion with America's hottest gang of freaks at her beck and call. Now, how on earth did all of this begin?

Johnny Knoxville X Fem!Reader, Chris Pontius X Fem!Reader, Steve-O X Fem!Reader, Bam Margera X Fem!Reader

(Fluff)

2.7k Words

Warnings: Extremely suggestive content, alcohol, friends to lovers, friends with benefits, drug use, injury, heavily implied sexual content, threesomes, premature ejaculation

An: Hello! This fic was inspired by this post by one of my friends, @xxxmargeraxxx! I couldn’t get this concept out of my head, no matter how hard I tried, and I think this has enough potential to become a series! Anyways, thank you so much for sending in requests, and please keep them coming!! :)

Upon hearing rumors of your living arrangements, people usually ask you one of two questions: ‘why would you do that to yourself?’ or ‘how the hell did all of this start?’. The former was pretty easy to answer- you liked it, however unconventional it seemed to others. You were like Hugh Hefner, only instead of living in the Hollywood Hills, your mansion was situated practically on the sand of the sunny, Miami coastline. The only other difference between the two of you was that instead of having flocks of girls in tiny satin one-pieces and bunny ears, you got your pick of the gaggle of half naked dudes running around your house. The latter question, however, that one’s a little trickier.

It started when, one day, out of the blue, one of your buddies from way back asked if he could crash for a week or two- said he was filming something in Florida and staying at your place would be cheaper than getting a hotel, which you happily obliged to because A: he was right and B: friends let friends sleep at their houses, especially when they have six guest rooms. You hadn’t seen him in a while, anyways- why not take the time to catch up a little? That night, over a few drinks, Johnny let you in on what he was working on - this pilot for MTV he was making with Jeff and Chris and the rest of the guys from that magazine he was writing for. “Hell, they don’t even know i’m here!” He chuckled, jabbing a thumb behind him, “Told ‘em I was stayin’ at the Motel 6 down the road.” You cracked a grin at his lie, sitting back in your patio chair as the blue light from the pool cascaded over the two of you. “When d’you gotta be up tomorrow?” Johnny shrugged, taking a swig of his beer, “Noon. As long as I get back there ‘round then, they won’t suspect a thing!”

So for the rest of the evening, you and Johnny went back and forth, talking for hours. He told you that they were going to meet this professional clown guy named Steve-O tomorrow who works with this flea market circus and who always gets great footage (or at least, really liked lighting himself on fire), and later that month they were flying out to Pennsylvania of all places to film with this professional skateboarder whose name you couldn’t quite remember given that you were pretty damn wasted by that point in the night. And as the evening went on, the topic of relationships came up, and you drunkenly relented to your best friend that the single life was torture. If you could die from not getting dick, you were on your last legs. Despite your dramatics, Johnny could sympathize with that- all those weeks on the road were wearing him pretty thin, he told you, looking at you from under those half lidded eyes which you couldn’t tell if they had grown that dark from exhaustion or desire. He cleared his throat, making eye contact with you, “Y’know, maybe there’s a solution that could help both’a us out…” Johnny proposed nonchalantly, “It’s just what friends do, y’know?”

Waking up in the same bed as your best friend made you realize something. Looking at the way the sunlight filtered in through the open, floor to ceiling antique stained glass windows made the tan muscles of his back just glow as he lay half-asleep, tangled up in your silk sheets made you realize how much you really liked having a man in your bed- not just any man, but him. And after a few moments he stirred a little, sat up with a tired groan, and then offered to cook you breakfast. Yep. That’s how your friendship with Johnny turned into a friends-with-benefitship.

Johnny didn’t return to Miami until after that pilot thing aired. Not only did they get the show picked up, but MTV wanted another season, and that meant more filming. The evening he flew in, he called you to meet up with him and the rest of his buddies from the show (minus those guys from Philadelphia- their flight was delayed till tomorrow) at this rinky-dink little shithole bar. But he didn’t introduce you as the lady who’s house he stays at and who he occasionally fucks- you were just Y/N. His awesome lady friend Y/N who lives in a mansion and has a pool- something that couldn’t be said about the hotel they were set up at, and that piqued Chris’ interest. It was the dead of summer in Florida, after all, and nothing feels better after a long day of banging yourself up than a nice cool swim. So when he asked to stop by sometime, you were eager to invite him over the next day they were off from shooting.

Peering out from your open kitchen window that afternoon Chris visited, you could barely believe what was happening. There you had two very attractive young men, one of which you were definately going to screw later, lounging around your pool in their swimsuits without a care in the world, all sun kissed and glistening. That’s the moment your idea of what you wanted changed- don’t get me wrong, you still lusted after Johnny like no tomorrow, but there was something with the idea of having more than one man to pick from that stirred something in you. It also helped that you were really into Chris’ whole long haired surfer dude thing he had going on- he was like a big, perverted golden retriever, and you weren't ashamed to say that you went for the dumb, jockish ones. Maybe you had him over for more than just wanting to help him cool off a little, but it’s not like you could blame yourself- he was right there. So as you finished whipping up the batch of strawberry daiquiris you were in the kitchen to make in the first place, you thought up a damn genius plan. And, taking a deep breath, you strutted out onto the pool deck in your little swimsuit with drinks in hand, sitting down at the edge of the pool deck to dangle your legs in the water right in front of Chris. Leaning forward, you asked him in flirtiest tone you could muster, “How’d you feel about stayin’ the night?”

Grinning, Chris took the drink you handed him and chuckled at your flirting, “Sure!” As you sat back with your own frosty drink, Johnny eyed you from the other side of the pool, his expression difficult to read due to those sunglasses that never left his face. You knew he wasn't the jealous type, but there was a distinct curiosity to his body language as he watched you (his friend) flirt back and forth with Chris (his other friend). As Chris started spending more and more time around the house, you discovered he had a talent for making you feel like the most perfect woman in the world, and not even just with his words or compliments. Whenever you’d walk in the room, he would just smile and look you up and down and give you that cute, sexy look. And you’d pinch his cheek and he’d laugh that dopey stoner laugh and it was just so sweet- he had this way of just anticipating whatever you needed to hear at a given moment.

So like that, the one guy you were screwing that night turned into two guys, and the next morning, before they slipped off to join back up with the rest of the crew, you let them know that they could come by anytime. Johnny and Chris told you they would be more than happy to stop by and pay their favorite girl a visit, and you felt a strange sense of pride at what you had. Sure, the arrangement was a little unconventional, but it was undeniably yours. Not to mention, you had something to look forward to. Pontius let it slip last night during pillow talk after Knoxville was out cold that they were starting work on a movie, and the two of them would certainly need a place to stay.

Filming for a movie is a lot different than filming for a tv show, namely that you have more time off. There would be days at a time where it would just be you, Chris, and Johnny at your beck and call, sitting around or doing whatever they felt like around the house until you gave them a wave of your hand and gave one of them an order: “Chris, honey- can you draw me a bath?” “Johnny, do you think you could rub my back?” “Both of you, meet me in my bedroom in five!” And they were both eager to jump at whatever you had in mind.

You know how Johnny was real discreet about what he and you got up to behind closed doors and the conditions your relationship operated on? Well, while he meant well, Chris just didn’t have it in him to keep secrets, especially from his best buddy Steve-O who he knew would just love this super sweet rich lady Knoxville was hanging out with. Once he started showing up (completely unannounced, by the way), you didn’t really say anything because you didn’t mind his presence and entertaining antics- what with all the jumping off of surfaces and lighting himself on fire. And you didn’t have to worry about Steve’s performance in bed not measuring up to that of the other two because he barely even made it to the bed in the first place. Sure, occasionally try to join you and Chris, but after taking about three steps into the room, he’d just stop for a second, turn around, and walk back where he came from, muttering to himself, “I’m out...” But that isn’t to say he wasn’t affectionate- in fact, due to his tendency to get his boxers glued to his left leg before the clothes came off, Steve compensated in other ways. If you weren't knocked out in bed with Johnny or Chris at the end of the night (or hell, even if you were), he would jump in under the covers next to you, wrapping those wiry arms of his around your waist and pulling you close to nuzzle his face into the crook of your neck. As unappealing as it may sound, you never slept better than with Steve, that ole’ cuddle bug.

However, as the days went on, you found yourself spending more of your time with the guys outside of the bed rather than in it. As you wandered around the mansion grounds, you took note of what you usually caught them doing because, after all, they would be staying with you for a while and you wanted to know how to keep your men happy. Johnny was easy, usually lazing around on the red velvet chaise lounge that sat in your living room while watching tv or nursing whatever fresh injury he got on set that week with a bag of frozen peas. You’d plop down on the couch next to him and idly chat about whatever was going on on Tv, while Chris was often found on your rooftop sun deck, working out and getting all bronze up there- a sight you never got tired of. Steve, on the other hand, really made it a struggle to keep track of him. He was all over the place, just sorta lurking around or high off of whatever he could get his hands on if he wasn’t attempting some ridiculous stunt. On the off occasion you could actually find him, he was usually sat slumped over against the wall or arch or column, and as you’d walk by, he’d chuckle a little or lay his head against your leg like some weird family dog. In fact, the four of you really were like a big, happy, kinda fucked up family.

Eventually, Bam started getting curious about where the hell those three kept screwing off to, but he never got a straight answer from Chris or Knoxville when he pressed them about it. On the other hand, Steve was more than happy to vividly describe that smokin’ hot rich lady Pontius introduced him to who lets them stay at her huge ass mansion in exchange for, get this- them letting her fuck them whenver she wants. It’s basically a porno set-up. You can kind of see how the words got twisted as they wound through the grapevine? But, of course, that sounded like a dream to Bam, and he just had to get in on that.

So he stood there on your doorstep in his swim trunks and t-shirt because he wanted to at least pretend he was coming for that pool he’s heard so much about. And god, when you opened the door you could hear his jaw hit the doormat. Bam knew you were hot before he showed up but, Jesus- this lady was hot. He was never one to be nervous around chicks, but you left him speechless. “Are you, uh- are you Y/N?” Sure, you’d never met the guy who was standing on your doorstep before, and it wasn't typical of you to invite strangers into your home, but you found the way he looked at you with those big ole’ eyes kinda cute. A plan started to form in your mind and you decided to mess with him a little, “Mmhm.” At that point, the guys had started to take notice of what was happening and started gathering around behind you to watch the show. Bam still tried to sound all cool and confident as he rambled, “I'm a friend’a Knoxville’s- you know, the skater one? He’s probably brought me up before.” That’s the guy? Leaning against the doorframe, you checked him out, “So you’re Bam, right?” He nodded quickly and you cracked a grin, “Well, we’ve gotta rule around here.” From behind you, Johnny raised his eyebrows and gave him a nod as you gestured with one hand, “No shirts for guys. So…” Bam blinked in delete if for a moment as he realized shit, this woman was serious. But all the other guys in the house were fully dressed? Ah, fuck it. Bam tugged off his shirt. Part of him didn’t wanna give in too quickly, but damn it, he just couldn’t get over the way you were looking him up and down like that- not that he would admit how much it got to him.

After you invited him in, that’s when things started getting fun. See, Bam was really eager for you to like him- and I mean really eager, so he spent the entire time trying to impress you. Like when everyone was sitting around the pool drinking or idly swimming, he’d ‘accidently’ flex his muscles while toweling off directly in your line of sight, or if you so much as mentioned that you were thirsty, he’d go running to grab you a drink from the cooler. You weren't in the market for a servant boy, but Bam’s restless pursuit of your attention was endearing, and you wouldn’t mind having something like that around the house. Sitting next to you on the other pool lounge chair, Johnny leaned over to whisper in your ear, “If I were you, Y/N, I’d keep an eye on him. Seems like he’s just dyin’ for your attention.” He certainly would liven things up around the place. It’d be like having a puppy around, only with less leg humping. Oh hell, he’d probably do that too if you gave him the word.

And that’s how everything came together. Now every time Jackass came to Florida to film, your house would be filled with life and chaos and all the men you could stomach for a few glorious weeks. And you wouldn’t have it any other way. Sure, there would be some hiccups along the way, and rules eventually had to be made, but we’ll get into those at a later time. For now, you had a new addition to your little menagerie, and you knew exactly how you wanted to celebrate the occasion.

[whoishotteranimepolls]

My observations part 2 there's been some developments

There have been some new developments in fandom behaviors and trends that have changed since my last post about this and since a lot of people have liked it, I'll give the curious people an update before I forget

I have noticed something about the Trigun fandom. I thought you all were just ride or die loyal however, if it's wolfwood holy crap! You guys give the unhinged trio a run for their money. Do you know how many times I've seen unhinged comments about his Catholic titties. And why is the Catholic part so important that it must be emphasized every time? Otherwise you all are still ride or die no matter the character. But I have found a streak of unhinged crazy that I apparently missed the first time around.

I know someone mentioned they wanted to see the Fairy Tail fandom mentioned so I will mention you. So are you alive Fairy Tail Fandom are you okay? Your characters do get requested with some frequency and some of them are pretty iconic but you guys just don't do anything except if it's Gildarts v Shanks. Because how many rematches are we on now because people like that specific matchup just so they can post the meme about Gildarts being Shanks from Temu. Otherwise characters don't do all that well. But I will say one thing. You guys are giving one piece a run for its money when it comes to cursed matchups. However, I'm sure it's a good thing. Remember people are very annoyed with that fandom on my blog

Soul Eater. What has gotten into you guys? If it's Stein the fandom is worse than the unhinged trio. Any other character? I never know what you guys will do

Fullmetal Alchemist you guys have finally exposed you're crazy! Her name is Olivier Mira Armstrong and the unhinged things said on those polls. She is now one of those characters I now question should I mark this as mature content because apparently some of you want to be stepped on by her amongst other things. Remember people I read basically everything that is put in the tags. And for those who doubt her power, as of me writing this, she's tied with Senshi in their poll.

The unhinged trio is still just as bad as ever for those who are not aware, that's the nickname I gave to Jujutsu Kaisen, Dorohedoro and Black Butler because those three fandoms collectively are just nuts. However, the unhinged trio may get a lineup change soon. So I'm going to break down the three of them since I've noticed some specific things about you guys so let's get into that

Jujutsu Kaisen I will give you one thing. You guys are creative when it comes to slutty nicknames I think that's the best way to put it. They're hilarious! I'll give you that. However, I think some of them have scarred me for life. So if you want to know why some of these slutty nicknames are getting shared in the poll reblogs it's because of you guys. But the nicknames some of them are unhinged. However, never change. Jujutsu Kaisen fandom your entertaining. If not, terrifying sometimes. However, without a doubt, this fandom belongs in the unhinged trio. You are the gold standard of the unhinged trio. Your feral unhinged madness cannot be matched by any other fandom.

Dorohedoro I'm wondering if you truly belong in the unhinged trio because I think your craziness only applies to Noi and not to the other characters. So I'm curious to see how this plays out over the next few weeks because as far as I'm aware there's only Three maybe four characters in that show Noi a blonde chick a blonde dude and a lizard. So we're going to see over the next few weeks if you all truly belong in the unhinged trio because there are some other fandoms that definitely are gunning for your position

Black Butler I also wonder if your craziness is fandom wide because you guys don't seem to care if Sebastian is in a poll, but if it's Undertaker or Grell holy crap the levels of insanity. So again, I will be testing to see if you truly are worthy of your spot in the unhinged trio

And I think the Senshi polls meme/trend has kind of died down. I haven't found a request in the inbox for a while and he has officially lost to Noi from Dorohedoro by a large margin and may lose but it'll be close to Olivier Mira Armstrong from Fullmetal Alchemist apparently we found his weakness strong, powerful women.

I hope everyone has enjoyed my second entry into my poll analysis series You can find part one here

[myloveismineallmine]

Sydcarmy & Beauty and The Beast

So, The Bear is a story with many themes and messages in it. The process of creating a story a lot times is just frankenstein-ing other stories and elements you like plus your owned lived experience.

I don't really remember how I started thinking about it, I do remember it was like 3am so that definitely has something to do with it, but I started thinking about Beauty and The Beast. And then I started comparing certain elements of it with The Bear. And then I started reading the Wikipedia page for Beauty and The Beast. And then I looked at the clock and it was like 4am so I was like okay, I should sleep now actually.

I did notice a lot of interesting similarities between the two, so I wanted to compare some of them in this post here. I think it's a really interesting lens to look at the story of The Bear from.

Chapter 1: The Beast

So, while it would be cool to do some kind of role reversal with the two romantic leads, this story does not do that, and the obvious parallel for Carmy is The Beast.

Rundown of The Beast's character traits, via wikipedia:

"In the original tale, the Beast is seen to be kind-hearted for the most part, and gentleman-like, with only an occasional tendency to be hot-tempered. Disney's interpretation of the Beast made him more constantly angry and depressed, due to the shame from his unkind actions which led to his transformation, and particularly his struggle of reconciling his hideous appearance with his inner humanity which made him feel hopeless about breaking the curse. Supervising animator Glen Keane describes The Beast as "a twenty-one-year-old guy who's insecure, wants to be loved, wants to love, but has this ugly exterior and has to overcome this." Upon his reform under his love interest Belle, his personality changes to refined and more even-tempered, while naive about the world at the same time."

Obviously this isn't to shame JAW's appearance, he's a pretty attractive dude, I'm looking more at the personality traits here.

The Disney version of him is way more unhinged and animal-like, which I'm not sure perfectly fits Carmy, but I feel like the insecurity, anger and depression is pretty accurate.

I don't think the "beast" element is entirely irrelevant, however. Let's think about what the namesake of the show is: The Bear. In reference, or course, to the main family having the last name Berzatto. They do also refer to each other as "Bear."

It's Cousin Michelle who makes the connection between the Berzattos and literal bears:

When she mentions this quote someone had said to her.

Stevie likens the Berzattos to bears later on in this episode:

It's pretty clear that the Berzattos = bears. Aggressive, but also kind and emphatic.

I also want to talk about the very first scene of The Bear:

Carmy is letting the bear out of it's cage, walking slowly towards it. He says "I know" to the bear, trying to calm it, or maybe trying to empathize with it. The bear growls and attacks him, and he wakes up from the nightmare.

It's clear that the caged bear represents something in Carmy. His rage, his stress, his grief. And he can't control it, it escapes and it consumes him.

Backstory of The Beast, extremely paraphrased:

Disney version: A prince is spoiled, cold-hearted and extremely selfish. He's transformed into a hideous beast as punishment, and told he won't transform back unless he earns the love a beautiful young woman.

Fairytale version: The prince's father died before he was born, and his bio mother leaves him in the care of an evil fairy godmother. Things get weird and incesty, this was the 1700s ig, the godmother tries to seduce the prince when he's an adult. He rejects her and she curses him to become a beast and says the curse won't be broken until he receives a maiden's act of true love. There's then a lot of really irrelevant fairy-lore and other stuff that I don't really want or need to get into.

I feel like evil mother figure one might be more accurate? Especially because Donna's one of the people who gave him so much trauma that he still carries with him? Generational trauma and addiction is "a curse" in a way.

Chapter 2: The Beauty

So it's very clearly Sydney.

Beauty in the OG fairytale doesn't have a super interesting personality outside of "pretty, caring and kind." so I think we'll look more at the Disney version here:

"While the studio wanted Beauty and the Beast to resemble an old-fashioned film, the writers envisioned Belle as "a woman that was ahead of her time"."

"...  the screenwriter conceived Belle as a headstrong feminist to avoid creating another "insipid" Disney princess."

"Beauty and the Beast's story department was predominantly male. Woolverton often argued with the more traditional story artists over Belle's role and personality, but continued to be supported by Katzenberg and lyricist Howard Ashman, the latter of whom also lobbied for "a thinker and a reader" who "wasn't a victim"."

So, Belle was basically a strong and independent woman for Disney at the time. I wanna hone in more on these character traits they mention specifically.

Sydney is very intelligent, even an overthinker at times. She literally shows up to, like, week 2 of work with a full book written on how the business can be improved.

We know she's a reader. Not only from the coach K book, she also mentions lending Marcus books at some point.

I also think Sydney fits the "not a victim" criteria. Sydney is shown pretty consistently to stand up for herself and fight back in situations.

On Beauty's backstory:

In every version of The Beauty and The Beast, Beauty's a daughter to a widower (much like Sydney is.) Beauty has many siblings, most notably her evil older sisters. They are omitted from the Disney version, and Belle is an only child.

In the Disney version, Belle is well known for her beauty, but looked down upon for not conforming to more traditional feminine roles.

Being a headstrong woman of color in the very white and male dominated world of fine dining, I can see how she fits this.

Her father has doubts about her career as a chef, she has had bad experience with chefs in leadership positions before, and the crew of The Beef really looks down on her at the beginning of the series.

Chapter 3: Beauty and The Beast

So now let's talk about the actual relationship of the Beauty and The Beast.

Belle/Beauty is lured into The Beast's castle because her father is being held captive inside. And interestingly....

Sydney references her father as the reason for why she applies for The Beef.

In the fairytale, The Beast is immediately smitten with Beauty and asks her to marry him every day. That would be a very obvious HR violation in The Bear, so I think it might be better to look at the Disney version of this story.

So in the Disney version, The Beast is more annoyed that Belle and her father showed up at all, but he does know she's a pretty woman and allows the release of her father so she will be his prisoner instead.

Their relationship is pretty bad at first, like you'd expect a captor and prisoner relationship to be, but he does allow her a nice lavish room. He orders her to have dinner with him, and she refuses to leave her room to protest against him.

Carmy and Sydney were friendly at first meeting, but after The Stock Incident, their cracks really start to show. It's when Sydney really stands her ground and argues back at him. This is not the end of the arguments and tension between them.

Belle and the Beast end up getting in a fight when Belle snoops around his room. He yells at her more loudly this time, and Belle flees the castle on horseback. She gets attacked by a pack of wolves and The Beast saves her. She takes him back to the castle and nurses his wounds.

This to me matches with the final fight Sydney and Carmy have in season 1. Carmy displays the worst of his anger, and it causes Sydney to want to wipe her hands with him completely. She grabs her stuff and leaves, telling him she's quitting.

She comes back when he apologizes to her, and they have a real bonding moment when they decide to open a restaurant together.

The Beast and Belle start to have a better relationship after The Beast heals. They become more friendly, The Beast more docile, and they're both really happy for the first time in the film. There's a scene where The Beast shows Belle the castle library and tells her it's hers.

I think the equivalent would be seeing Carmy and Sydney plan the menu together. In those scenes they seem less like co-workers and more like friends. You can also tell it's one of the few things they get actual real enjoyment doing.

I think the main parallel I see for this relationship is how Carmy and Sydney improve each other. Like with Belle and The Beast, you can actually see Carmy learn how to better handle conflict and communicate more efficiently when he's placed with Sydney.

He's more vulnerable. He apologizes more. He's able to better control his temper.

There's two very concrete examples of Sydney being able to help stabilize his emotions, actually.

Sydney is quite literally "taming the beast" in Carmy. Cognitive behavioral therapy would also achieve that, but Carmy is too much of a workaholic to attend a session, so Sydney will have to do for now. They didn't have CBT in 1700s France, either, unfortunately.

I will also say that this isn't a 90 minute Disney movie, so the slow-burn will be slow-buring for awhile until we get to the actual conclusion of the fairytale.

Chapter 4: Gaston

so I have two characters in mind for this role: Richie and Marcus. But def more heavy on Richie than Marcus.

Gaston is a villain made exclusively for the Disney movie. Here's some description for him:

"In direct contrast to his adversary the Beast, Gaston is depicted as physically handsome with an unattractive personality, both physically and emotionally embodying hypermasculinity. "

"Gaston has been generally positively received by film critics, as his lack of "magic power or political influence" means that his villainy tends to resonate with audiences who often identify someone similar to him in real life, although critics regard him as a less memorable villain than some of the studio's previous efforts."

"The Huffington Post described early drafts of Gaston as "a weaselly, sort of wimpy character." In fact, Gaston was originally intended to resemble more of an annoying than antagonistic character,"

So I think Richie kind of fits the "hypermasculinity" thing, in terms of some of his mindset and sexist behaviors.

Richie, for at least the first season, really looks down on fine dining as a concept. He makes fun of Carmy and Syd for their background in it and makes snide comments about it whenever possible.

Gaston also looks down on Belle for liking books, and encourages her to live a more "simple" life with him instead.

Here's a really interesting parallel I found with these two:

Making fun of the main character's book and then throwing it away? In the intro of the story? Very interesting.....

As far as the similarity with Marcus: it begins and ends with Marcus and Gaston both having unrequited feelings for the main female protagonist.

Other than that, Richie is way more Gaston coded in the grand scheme of things. Just not as evil. I feel like he gives first-draft Gaston with being "More annoying than antagonistic."

Chapter 5: What about Claire?

I see Claire fitting into this as almost like a faux-Belle. The love interest that's supposed to "fix" the main protagonist, but something doesn't work.

Again, there's two scenes I wanna look at specifically to showcase this:

This reaction shot of Carmy. This is the last shot of the sex scene, and there are some other previous shots of the sex scene overlaying this at times. But I've been wanting to do a deep dive into it for awhile-- why have this shot? What's the purpose of it?

I think that this shot clearly tells us that Carmy is either pensive and/or dissatisfied with what has happened. Laying with his eyes open and just staring at the wall, deep in thought, possibly regretful. This isn't the expression a man who's just had sex with a pretty woman usually has. This is one of many clues that this relationship isn't something that he really wants or enjoys.

Aaaand, the panic attack scene again. If Claire was his "true love", she would be able to quell his anxiety and panic, if this whole "beauty and the beast" story arc I'm putting together is to be believed.

Claire is the perfect girl. She's pretty, smart, talented. His family loves her. She loves him. But she does nothing to fix his problems. Because it's not true love.

Carmy not being happy at the thought of Claire vs Carmy cracking a smile because he looks at containers of radichio + fennel, ingredients Sydney cooked him once.

It is ABUNDANTLY clear that his feelings for Syd help his mental state in ways his feelings for Claire do not. Because what he feels for Sydney is closer to true love.

Conclusion:

Am I saying Christopher Storer took the plot beats and characters 1 for 1 from Beauty and The Beast? No, obviously not. Am I saying that maybe he sat down one day and this movie was on and he was like "hey maybe i can do something with this"? Possibly!

This is just speculation at the end of the day, but I really loved looking at all the possible connections between these two things. Tell me your thoughts on all of this: cool interpretation or am I just talking out of my ass?

[colourstreakgryffin]

If u still write for Haikyuu, I have this little yan!Sugawara x fem!reader concept: Reader is a new 1-2nd year at Karasuno who got dared to disguise as a boy and join the boys volleyball team as a dare but actually got in, so now she has to keep up her disguise until graduation. For some reason, the other boys dont realize and just think Reader is a really feminine dude with a manbun💀 (reader never cut her hair)

One time, Sugawara just accidently finds out reader's gender because he came over to her house once and reader PANICS. Like "OHMYGODPLEASEDONTTELLANYONEATSCHOOLABOUTHISISWEARI'LLDOLITERALLYANYTHING-" readers thinks shes cooked as hell basically (she kinda is)

(I'm sorry if this is too much, what I just wrote is a whole fanfic 💀)

Oh. Right! Okay, normal love(what I got from your follow-up). I do not like when the request is written for me but you know what. I really like this concept, it’s got so many Mulan vibes and I’m gonna do it! Thank you for the Haikyuu request, I haven’t written for Haikyuu in such a long time

Koshi Sugawara- Red-Handed

Koshi Sugawara has really been suspicious of you since the first time you entered the Gymnasium… you proclaim you’re a boy, you do… look like one, no real feminine body parts so that’s a good sign but you’re also kinda curvy, kinda delicate and have a long man-bun. Well, he can’t really talk much about man buns… Asahi

However, he always felt like there was more with you than meets the eye, it is a feeling stirring in his gut for such a long time now yet it laid dormant for as long, out of how nonsensical it truly is. He just knew it, he just didn’t want to speak up

That’d just be plain rude

This day flies by as every other day, Koshi watching over and working with both Ukai and Daichi to watch over the second and first years of the volleyball club. Hinata and Kageyama eagerly but competitively throwing spikes and hits to each other over the court and the net. Tsukishima just listening to his dear friend, Yamaguchi‘s comments. Nishinoya and Tanaka making quite the big deal over Kiyoko giving them wet towels whilst basically worshipping her every breath, during the break the whole team are taking… but where are you?

Koshi wanted to explore where you are and find out why you always hid away after each break but he is way too polite and well-mannered to dare make his own big deal over you so whilst he watches you arrive back to the court… he thinks you’re odd, always thinks you’re odd. Such a feminine curvy ‘man’ you are, he wonders why but he doesn’t want to press on it too much

After a few more hours, the club finally closes off for the day and as every member begins to clean off, Koshi’s eyes naturally begun to smoothly follow you once more he is done packing up the team’s uniforms, whose is helping Tanaka put away the net on the net set into the storage closet

How weird… but not that important

Koshi is the last member of the club to leave, taking over specific maintaining and cleaning duties off the Coaches and Managers so they can get home and rest sooner, he always wishes to help them as they work so hard for him and the team. His footsteps lightly tap and skid on the slippery wood plane floor of the school’s infamous gymnasium

The keys jiggling loudly in his pant pockets as he checks over the private locker room, going a double check to ensure that no sensitive belongings or important items are left behind and well, yes. There was something… something of yours, your personal club jacket, spotted from the corner of his eyes at your changing locker

Koshi cannot just leave this behind as he picks it up smoothly, his thumbs tracing over the silky soft black fabric and reading over your last name stamped on the back. It’s not even just that, he can feel something harder in the pocket and finds out it’s your phone, making the need to give it back to you more urgent

He does know your address, as all personal information is written down then hidden away by Kiyoko for any possible emergencies. Since you’re also a member of the team, your number and address is dotted down like the rest, including himself

He knows it’s immortal to snoop through confidential information for unnecessary reasons but he doesn’t see it as anymore good to simply leave this possession in the gymnasium where it could possibly be taken by another Club’s members or a faculty member

Koshi, after a few seconds of deep thought and his eyes glued to the folded cellphone his hand is holding through the black club jacket’s pocket, decides that he must personally head to your home and deliver your valuable item himself as he doesn’t want to bother any of your friends nor any of his own teammates to drop it

Setting off on a grave trip to your place after pushing through his own moral thoughts screaming at him to just take your phone number and call you and tell you to come pick up your jacket holding your valuable phone, he can’t bring himself to do so as he locks up the gym slowly and steadily as well as with not even a loud breath leaving him. It’ll be okay

That’s all he tells himself

Koshi, after an almost painful walk with how heavy his heart is over his guilt and shame… he doesn’t know how long this trip took but he didn’t necessarily care, his hands and arms almost possessively clung on the jacket to ensure he won’t lose any little piece of it. He may be a bit suspicious off you but you’re a good kid at the end of the day

He reached a rather pretty looking house in the ordinary neighbourhood of this pretty little town calls theirs, bracing forward with an explanation buried in the wired nerves of his brain and edging on the tip of his tongue. Stopping right before the door, Koshi politely knocks

Knock. Knock. Knock. Knock

Then silence falls upon himself and the already quiet household for a few long uncomfortable seconds until it swings open and his eyes widen in surprise… that… is you. This pretty girly girl before him, looks so much like you and the way she flinches and her hand tightens on the doorknob. He has a feeling it may just be you

The new member of the Volleyball club, the ‘boy’ whose man bun could give Asahi a run for his money. However, Koshi shoves it aside for now, suspecting it may just be a sister of yours and he is not one to create unwanted drama so he politely cracks a pretty smile and offers the jacket before saying

“Here, ma’am. This is for your brother”

You, going to pretend like you aren’t the boy who joined the club, takes the jacket and makes your voice as sweet and girly as possible to try deflect off your own awful deep impression of a male voice when you’re doing this longtime stupid dare at the club. Answering with a thank you, your mother ruins everything by merely saying

“Dokusha, honey! When you’re done at the door, come to the table! It’s time for dinner!”

That’s all Koshi needed to hear and all the locked away supscious he had, are rising from the deep soiled ground to explore… you’re a girl? Well, he kinda assumed so but he also hoped he was just tripping but he isn’t and he couldn’t be more… offended

It didn’t take long for you to begin panicking, like properly panicking as your mother didn’t even know what was truly going on from the kitchen in her peacefully cheerful oblivious little world. With a flustered face and much shame and regret and a weight of million apologises and begs for forgiveness, you begin mindlessly crying out

“OHMYGODPLEASEDONTTELLANYONEATSCHOOLABOUTTHISISWEARILLDOLITERALLYANYTHINGSUGAWARA-SAN!IWASDAREDTOATTENDTHECLUBBY MYFRIENDS,I’MSORRY!”

Koshi is quite mad at what he has found this very second as you spill out all your guts through begs for him to spare you, the truth about the ‘boy’ he had many suspicions on for such a while yet had always respected by never speaking on. You’re not a boy at all. You lied right to his face?! All for some dumb little dare from some friends! You don’t need to do this! You committed a minor case of fraud, something very immorally wrong

Whilst he is furious, he isn’t heartless

He gets that children like you make dumb mistakes. He makes dumb mistakes… a lot and he won’t throw the book at you for this, even if it’s wrong. He just will give you a long LONG lecture about why this is bad, to never do it again and work to try get you onto the girls’ Volleyball team. If you’re that interested in Volleyball

Koshi eventually manages to find his voice again after examining every part of you with his sharp eyes to remind himself once more that this is real, maintaining his usual composure and poise in a flash, as to not scare you off. He’s mad but he does kinda understand where you come from

“Dokusha… after dinner, do you have a minute to talk? We… need to discuss a number of things”

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

My IRL ex who lives abroad now is dating my online friend who also lives there and I am deceiving them, AITA?

All of us are Asian, 29. Fake names are used.

My ex (Fred) was my childhood best friend, we grew up together in the same conservative society, people expected to see us marry since we were kids, all that jazz. At 18, we both moved away and kept up LDR. Moving meant big changes of course, I was in a huge city and I had internet access for the first time. I became a BTS fan in 2013, I started creating and reading a lot. I joined tumblr, made friends from all over the world. I was being radicalized rapidly, and I figured out I was bi too. My world was suddenly a million times bigger.

He however, didn't change much. He was scientific minded unlike most people here and his friends were all STEM kids but they were still functionally right leaning. He was racist when it came to BTS or East Asians in general. He was ignorant and happy to ignore queer existence, he used to say things like queer people needed to be shown the right path. We were turning out to be quite the opposites. Eventually we broke up. He was heartbroken, he tried to drag me back in many times and I avoided him like plague. I managed to ditch him completely when we were about 23. He left for USA to study.

Around the same time I befriended one of my closest online friends, Daphne. We lived in the same state but she was always traveling so we never got to meet. We're both hellsite veterans and keep our identities under lock & key so we don't know our real names or exact place of work, but we know each other's deepest kinks and childhood traumas, and stories about our exes. We both had the same kind of interests, politics, and fandoms, we're both bisexual. I've also come out as a trans man a few years ago and I go by a masculine name online, can't transition IRL. Daphne's known me since my girl era. Daphne left for USA last year for her Masters.

Now the wild part, by some twist of fate, Daphne met Fred who's also working on his Masters in an adjacent field. It is by no means a niche subject and USA is the fourth largest country, they still found each other. He sang in our first language at some party, he's very hot, and... he's into BTS like her. Wild. So they're now dating.

They started following each other on twitter and he followed a bunch of her friends including Me! We have exchanged pleasantries and while on his account he has his real name and location, mine is a mixed bag account with my fake name and my (sfw) queer creations all over it.

I know who He is but he doesn't know who I am, he thinks I'm just one of Daphne's dudes, and Daphne doesn't know that she's dating my ex who she had promised to drop into the Challenger's Deep (joke). My reasoning for hiding the truth is-- It's still not safe for me to be out IRL and he can mess it up. I remember his bigotry, I hate him, I have every right to avoid him and here that means not revealing my identity. But it's been years so maybe he has changed, and Daphne is my friend. So, I feel like a massive ahole for not telling her at least. At the same time she really did hate my racist homophobic right leaning ex a lot, so knowing the truth will make things awkward and I don't want to lose my friend.

So, there you have it. AITA?

BTW, no I'm not into BTS ships or reader insert fantasies, that's not what I create. I know someone would ask about it so there. I'm also Not attracted to Daphne, if I was I'd have asked her out straight away, I don't play around about my crushes.

What are these acronyms?

[onskepa]

REMINDER TO EVERYBODY: This au is one where Spider is a girl and the Sully's kids are boys.

Here we go for the sequel i been waiting on...

I was thinking,

Spider getting courted by this male na'vi (I really headcanon he's pansexual in canon, so i think in this au he's is too)

And like, she's on with this for a while, because why not?

She's 16 she would love to have a boyfriend and shit like that, every girl her age does it.

She and this guy, flirt, go on strange walks togheter, hunt and do things like this with eachother..

But the Sully's boys, do NOT like this, they all jealous (not in a sexual or romantic way, but in a platonic way, like older brothers are protective of their younger sisters)

And they start this series of "condolences" where Spider is needed to them.

Like

Neteyam: Spider i really need your help with my ikran, she can only calm down with your help i swear.

-

Lo'ak: dude, i need your help with cleaning my family's knives, i really cant do it without your help

-

Kiri: monkey girl, can you please help me search from this herbs? my grandmother really needs them!

-

Tuk: can we pretty please play with me?

-

Spider in a way of another always accepts, until her date gets angry at her for dropping out on their dates every last minute (especially after he organised a big day for them to spent togheter, and she dropped it because she was asked by one of the boys)

She goes cry to her brothers about it, and meanwhile they console her, Lo'ak let himself escape a "We knew he wasn't good for you anyway sis"

And she gets really mad, and starts yelling at them about how is all their fault and that she can't belive they did something like that to her.

(Idk how to go forward to this point honestly, i hope in you love xx)

Hellooooooo darling~!!

So I can see so many things with this idea! Hope you and everyone enjoy this one~!!

P.S: Spider = Arachnid, Kiri = Kamun , Tuk = Tik

Arachnid

------------

Arachnid: Lose strings

Some time has passed since the incident with Tony, and while he has never done anything like that ever again, Arachnid knows better than to be alone in the lab other than her own personal room. 

However, it hasn't stopped the deep worry the poor girl has. Thinking that every other male aside from the sully brothers, wants something from her. Should arachnid need something or ask, it is mostly the women she goes to. Rarely she would ask norm or max. 

But that doesn't stop her from having fun with the sully brothers. They are her best friends and closest to a family she has.  Arachnid is happy despite some bumps on the road. And it is fine. 

Until one na’vi male took interest in her.

Srefey, a young male na’vi who had finished his iknimaya not long ago. Bright, talented, always eager to help those in need. But he is also someone who longs for something. While young and still discovering new things, he desires something that his loving parents have. 

A strong bond with a significant other. 

Someone who he can call many loving names, do things together, and build a small paradise just between the two. Srefey’s parents are in no rush to find someone for him, or he is looking for someone. There is a time and a place, as they always say. Yet Srefey can't help but search. To yearn for someone as they yearn for him. 

Of course he should be patient

But at the same time, he should explore his options and see what else he considered yet. 

“Hey don't act so spoiled now temtem” Arachnid giggles as temtem, neteyam’s ikran, nuzzles against her. 

“Alright, just one more” She says, tossing a big piece of meat into the ikrans mouth, temtem accepts it happily. 

“I swear he should be your ikran instead. Never listen to me” Neteyam says as he shakes his head. Both gently pet temtem as he purrs in his own way. Loving the attention he is getting. 

“Maybe the way you approach him is wrong,” Arachnid suggested. Neteyam sighs, “I have tried your tips, copied how you speak and touched him. Yet nothing works, it is like he just prefers you over me. And I am the rider” Neteyam says. Tetem grunts as if to agree with him. 

“Awe~ Is that it temtem? You like me? Yeah? You like me better than old grumpy neyney?” Arachnid baby talks temtem as she scratches under his chin, having him pant happily like a dog. 

“I'm not grumpy” Neteyam frowns as he crosses his arms. 

“Whatever, I will watch over him while you get your stuff” Arachnid suggests. Agreeing to that, neteyam leaves. 

Srefey and a small group of other young na’vi go to attend their ikrans. Seeing his beloved ikran, roar out in how he missed srefey. 

“My dear friend, I have missed you too” Srefey comforts his ikran. 

“ARACHNID!!” 

The voice of a young one was heard past him. Turning, he recognizes young Tik sully, following behind were his two older brothers, kamun and lo’ak. All three walked towards the sky na’vi, arachnid. He sees how the brothers interact with the girl. All hugging and talking with the young girl like a close friend, family from what he can see. 

Srefey was aware of arachnid and how she does her best to contribute to the clan. Many acknowledge and some pretend she doesn't exist. He wasn't in between but this is a first where he truly saw her. 

While attending to his ikran, srefey couldn't help but observe the sky na’vi. Arachnid tends to neteyam’s ikran well, and the ikran responds to her petting, kind words, and anything she does. Speaking in fluent, perfect na’vi as she speaks to anyone. The girl's voice was soft and kind, from what he could hear at the distance. 

The more he sees, the more curious he becomes about arachnid. 

“Tsahik, some of the warriors require your help, they can't make it all the way over here” a na’vi told mo’at. Quickly she gathers her things and turns to arachnid. “You stay and continue with the paste, help anyone who comes. I will return”, with an affirmed nod from arachnid, mo’at leaves. 

Arachnid begins to hum a lovely tune as she continues to make healing paste among other medicines. It is moments like that, being alone can clear her mind. At peace and at her own pace. 

At least for 5 minutes before the flaps of the healing tent opened. 

“Tsahik, I-oh, I'm sorry, is the tsahik not here…?” A young na’vi entered, gripping his shoulder. Arachnid turned to him, shaking her head. 

“No, she left not too long ago to help with some of the warriors. However, tsahik has taught me her ways, I can help you” Arachnid offered. 

A smile reached up to the young na’vi’s lips, sitting down at the woven mat, he showed his wound to the sky na’vi. There was a deep slash, blood still escaping from the wound. Quickly, arachnid got to work. While she didnt speak, concentrated to get the materials and stop the bleeding, the boy observed her, seeing how quick and swiftly she began to do her thing, very much like a healer of advanced level. 

Grabbing a wet rag, slowly arachnid taps it gently on the wound, cleaning the blooded area. 

“Did a hunt go wrong?” She asked, as means to distract him a bit from the stinging pain. The boy huffed a bit. “You could say that, a herb of strumbeast came out of nowhere. We had little time to get out of their way. I got hurt by hitting against a rock, but others obtained more serious injuries”, he explained. 

“That explains Mo'at having to leave” arachnid replied. 

They made a few glances at each other, giving small talk. 

“There, all better,” Arachnid says as she finishes bandaging his wound. Doing a bit of shoulder movement, the boy was surprised how bit of pain he felt and how freely he can move his arm. The sky na’vi is very good. 

“Thank you” the boy says, grinning in gratitude. Arachnid nods. 

“I never catched your name,” the boy says. 

“My name is Arachnid,” the girl replies with a warm smile. This made the boy smile bigger in return. 

“Pleasure to meet you arachnid, my name is srefey”.

After their first meeting, do they cross paths more often. Notice each other but arachnid still keeps her distance. Her trust in males still warry. Of course the sully’s were not that oblivious to the quick glances but didn't interfere much. For now. 

“Arachnid, look I found these large flower orange petals. Should we make a new top for you? It will bring out your stripes more” Kamun said to arachnid one day. Arachnid inspected the material, it was soft and very beautiful, she nodded. 

“But this time, maybe I should cover myself a bit more…” arachnid mutters. Kamun hears this and sighs, “are they still bothering you?” he asked while growling a bit. “If they are, just say the word and we will take care of them”. 

Arachnid was quick to shake her hands and head denying it, “no no! They stopped after whatever you did with tony”. This brought Kamun a sense of peace as his shoulders relax. “Then you shouldn't worry, don't let the past incident cloud you. Never be ashamed of your body” Kamun encourages. 

Agreeing, arachnid and kiri begin to work. 

The following day, Arachnid wears her new clothing with love and pride. Kamun was right, orange does bring out her stripes better. Which made her feel more confident and happy. And a special na’vi noticed her happy improvement. 

“Need some help?” Srefey asked arachnid one bright morning. Arachnid collected some special leaves but holding a basket, while holding a vine and at the same time picked at the leaves it a bit of a challenge. But arachnid was still warry. 

“I can manage,” Arachnid replied, a bit stubbornly. This made Srefey chuckled, “are you sure? I can see you trying to balance yourself and the basket. It can be done quicker if you let me assist” he offered. 

Arachnid was alone and the sully brothers will doing some training, promised to help her later, but she needed the leaves now. Sighing a bit in defeat, Arachnid allowed srefey in assisting her. “Fine, but I hold the basket, you can just drop the leaves in there,” Arachnid said. This was fine with srefey. 

Switching sides, arachnid stayed on the ground as srefey climbed on the vine and started to collect the leaves and drop them on the basket. “What do you need these leaves for?” Srefey asked out of curiosity. Arachnid was a bit hesitant to answer, “why do you want to know?” Arachnid asks back. 

Srefey chuckles a bit, “can I know?”, arachnid shrugs and doesn't say much. After a few minutes, the basket was full so srefey got down. “Would you like me to carry it?” He offers. Arachnid quickly and gently takes the basket closer to her body, “thanks but you did enough. I can carry it, it's not heavy”. Really, it wasn't. Srefey took notice of how arachnid’s behavior is. A bit distant and not making much eye contact. 

“You know, you dont have to be so tense around me. I won't hurt you, you seem like a nice person to be around” Srefey compliments. Arachnid had her eyes wide a bit, surprised by his choice of words. Perhaps she was being a bit cold to him. 

“S-sorry, it's not that I think you would hurt me, I am just…still tense from an incident” Arachnid confesses. This caught srefey’s attention. Now his eyes fully on her, he couldn't help but know, “incident? Has someone hurt you?”. 

“Not physically, since I wear na’vi clothing majority of the time. Human males had looked at me with….uncomfortable glances. Someone tried to take me somewhere more private but, lucky kamun and tik arrived on time. Send me off to tsahik, I dont know what they did but after that, many males didnt try to touch me again. However, it still doesnt shake off their stares at me. So sorry if I am being like this to you, it's not easy to just shake it off. Being alone with a man still irks me” Arachnid explains. 

Now fully understanding her situation, srefey thinks of another route. Stupid humans are still doing stupid things it seems. 

“Well, how about I show you?” Srefey asks, this made arachnid raise an eyebrow. 

“Show me?” 

“Yes, let me prove to you that I mean now harm. I won't lie arachnid, you have captured my interest, and before you assume anything. I merely wish to get to know you. Be friends even. And if you think it won't work out, or if you are uncomfortable, just tell me. I won't force you, have you be in control”. 

Arachnid let his offer linger in her mind. Her finger tapping on her chin as she hums in thought. It wouldn't hurt right? She cant always be living in fear. 

“Alright, I don't mind being friends with you” Arachnid gives her answer, this made srefey smile in excitement.  

“Great, I know you are busy but how about tomorrow? We can go and…”

3 months of lovely friendship grew between arachnid and srefey. 3 months of getting to know each other, likes, dislikes, secrets and discovering new things together. 3 months of platonic relationship, until it grew into something more….intimate. 

“What…?” Arachnid asks, in disbelief of what she is hearing and seeing in front of her. 

On a bright sunny day, after playing in a clear river and eating good fruit. Srefey thought it would be a perfect moment for what he longed to speak. 

“Allow me to court you” Srefey said patiently, his smile warm and hopeful. 

Arachnid was truly at a loss for words. Someone, someone with zero bad intentions, someone who sees her more than a human, someone who desires her in a romantic way. The whole thing sounded impossible to believe. 

“B-but im human…” Arachnid says, almost in a mere whisper. 

Srefey lets a chuckle escape him as he slowly gets closer to her. 

“And? That doesn't stop me from wanting to court you. You are na’vi in all forms. Even if you don't have a kuru, or share our blue skin, I could care less. You are you arachnid, and that is what I enjoy” Srefey confesses. 

Oh if only srefey knew what those words make arachnid feel. 

“I…*Sighs* srefey, what if I don't see or feel the same way as you?” Arachnid asks, rubbing her arms as means for comfort and reassurance. If anything, it only made srefey get closer to her, his hands ghosting over hers. 

“Allow me to change your mind. And if..in the end it doesn't work, we can still be friends. You are too incredible for me to lose. Please..?” 

After long seconds of silence, Arachnid gives her answer. 

“Ok, let's see where this goes”. 

“YOU ARE BEING WHAT?!” the four sully brothers screamed/asked in complete and utter shock. Unable to process what they were told. And as they all have a moment of brain exe. Not working moment, Arachnid calmly drinks her tea. 

“Srefey is courting me” Simple. Easy. 

If only it really was that simple and easy. 

“B-but…..h-how-justWHAT?!” Lo’ak was freaking out, grabbing his hair as he paced back and forth. Tik was just as speechless as neteyam while Kamun narrowed his eyes. 

“You? C-courted?! Srefey?!” 

Arachnid rolled her eyes, “oh calm down, it's not that big of a deal” 

“IT IS A BIG DEAL!!” Tik shouted, snapping out of his own shock. Grabbing arachnid by the arm, he starts to shake her. “Tik stop!! My tea!!” Arachnid shouted as big drops of her tea were spilling from the constant shaking. Which tik didn't care for. 

“Knock it off, seriously. Great, now I have to make more” Arachnid whined a bit, gently pushing tik away as she prepares to make more tea. 

“Did he bribed you? Manipulated you? Just say the word and we will take care of it” Neteyam urges. Arachnid was starting to feel a bit annoyed by how persistent they are. 

“He didn't do anything. Srefey asked me, and I accepted. I made the choice for him to court me. No one is forcing anything. Simple as that. Meaning, you four will also have to accept it” 

This new turn of events wasn't something the four brothers liked. Arachnid is someone dear to them, a sister in all but blood. While arachnid can do many things, she is still limited and vulnerable. To protect her has become the brothers new purpose. Making sure Arachnid is safe and out of harm's way. 

And srefey, well, he has become a new threat to them.

“Here, I made these for your hair. I thought…it would look nice” Srefey tells Arachnid, on his hands are well carved beads all of them in beautiful colors. Arachnid gasped in awe. Gently grabbing one bead at a time, carefully inspecting them, the manner of the carving shows the complexity of the patterns, no two beads were the same. 

“Srefey…you didn't have to do this” Arachnid whispered as she blushed a bit. It is very rare that she is given something. Srefey feels happy and satisfied that Arachnid loves his gift. 

“I insist, besides. This is my first courting gift to you. And there will be many to come” Srefey grins. Arachnid blinked a few times, the first of many? Just how many gifts will it take? While arachnid does know the basics of courting in na’vi, each courting is still unique to their own. 

“Very well, but please. I don't need anything big for you to show me what you are capable of. Just…treating me right is enough for me” Arachnid tells srefey. Her smile bright and warm, of the many things Srefey has come to cherish with all his heart. 

“As you desire ma’Yawntu” 

Srefey will be the death of her if he continues with those names. 

Arachnid wore her new beads with great joy. She styled her hair almost the same, but this time she tied the front part and pulled back to expose more of her face. Decorating her hair with the beads made her feel more part of the clan. Oh how she loves the new beads. Srefey knew how to pick as they were of fine quality. Makes her appreciate his efforts. 

However, while the change was great, not everyone was liking it. Thus, the sully brothers often sulking and began to hate srefey. The more time arachnid spends with that young na’vi, the less time she spends with them. Which often ends the day with a sour mood. Kamun and tik are so used to having arachnid around, it is so strange not to have that anymore. Lo’ak misses pulling pranks and cracking dumb jokes with arachnid, and neteyam misses arachnid as he feels like a baby brother when she is around. 

And who is srefey to think he is worthy of their dear sister? After all that she went through, who is to say it won't happen again? They dont trust that goody goody srefey. Nothing ever good comes out of those who want arachnid. 

Until, one day, after seeing arachnid wear a matching necklace of srefey’s, did the brothers last standing tolerance break. 

“Boys…I have an idea” 

Srefey is a young warrior and a hunter, and would often go join a hunting party to gather enough meat for everyone in the village. That means there is a planned time and place of where to go. A schedule if you will. Meaning there is plenty of time to plan what to do by the time that srefey gets back. 

“Alright, everyone understood the plan?” Neteyam asks his younger brothers who all nodded enthusiastically. Neteyam grins in satisfaction. Good, if they all follow the plan, then nothing should fail. They know arachnid in and out. 

Lo’ak and neteyam left to join the same hunting party as srefey while kamun and tik do their part. By taking arachnid to a different area, a bit farther from the village. 

“You two, when I said I had time I didnt think you would take me all the way over here” Arachnid said as they settled in a nice area with a lake nearby for a swim. The view was lovely, there is no denying that, but to get there took a good amount of time. She didn't want to arrive back late and miss srefey returning. It didn't help that Kamun or tik did not think to bring their ikrans for faster travel. 

“Come on, we miss hanging out with you. It isn't the same with you being with that srevie guy” Tik complained. “Srefey” Arachnid corrected, tik could care less. That no good na’vi was taking time and attention from their sweet sister. 

“Whatever, come on! We can make some pretty cool slingshots or make more flower crowns, OH! We can plays hunter on hunter!” Tik suggested so many activities. And all sounded so much fun, unable to deny tik’s cute face, Arachnid chose what game and the three began to play. 

Until Arachnid lost track as she noticed the sun was beginning to set. Panic flowed into her. 

“Oh my Eywa, we have to get back!!” She was in a hurry, no doubt srefey already made it back and hoped to see her. But arachnid was so caught up in the games, she failed to realize how much time has passed. 

Kamun and tik on the other hand were in no rush to return home. As that is part of their plan. Placing an arm around arachnid’s shoulder, Kamun took his time walking, making arachnid having to follow his slow pace. 

“Relax arachnid, we will make it back. There will still be plenty of food by the time we get there” Kamun says in an odd relaxed tone. This only made arachnid more annoyed by the second. How she really wished she had an ikran of her own. Pushing Kamun's arm off of her, Arachnid begins to run, this makes tik and kamun follow. 

“Arachnid!! Wait up!!” Tik shouts, trying to keep up with her speed. Kamun quickly picks his little brother up in his arms and runs faster. “Why in such a hurry?! We have time!!” Kamun shouts at Arachnid, but the human girl ignores him. Her mind set on arriving at the village. There is already good progress, she will be damned if anything risks her relationship with srefey. 

And what felt like forever, Arachnid made it back just as the eclipse was forming in the sky. People were already going over to the fire pits, the meat no doubt already prepared and ready to serve. This made arachnid anxious. Looking all over the crowd to find srefey. 

“Ma’arachnid!” 

Quickly arachnid turned to find srefey waving his arm, smiling as he looked at her. Sighing relief, she goes over to him and gives him a big hug. Srefey happily returned the gesture. 

“I was starting to worry, it is unlike you to be late for anything” He says with a relieved smile on his handsome face. Arachnid chuckled a bit, “I was out with kamun and tik, we left early and I thought we would make it back. Only to realize just how far it was, but I am here now” she replied. 

Srefey brings his hand on her shoulder and guides to one of the fire puts and begins to eat together, discussing their day. While not too far from them the 4 sully’s throw death glares at srefey. 

“Well, it sort of worked” Kamun said as he stares at the couple. “Guess we will have to try harder” Lo’ak responded. 

And try harder they did.

Each sully takes turns in planning their next move, but usually it would be either lo’ak or kamun being the masterminds. And their plans work, as little by little do they interrupt arachnid’s and srefeys dates. Each sully taking turns using some form of excuse to take arachnid away from srefey. 

Less time does the two spend, and now they take arachnid everywhere before she can even look for srefey in the village. However as the boys secretly celebrate their growing victory, Arachnid and srefey were growing frustrated in their own ways. 

One morning Arachnid went to the village extra early, determined to find Srefey before those annoying boys find her instead. As she runs, she begins to see the early risers up and about. Srefey is an early riser, likes to get things early to have some free time later. Free time that should have been spent with arachnid if things don't stop coming her way. 

“There he is!” She gasps happily to see srefey organizing some baskets. 

“Srefey!” she happily calls out to him. The young na’vi turns and a smile spreads on his lips, stopping what he was doing, he turns completely to arachnid who jumped into his arms, giggling like a youngster in love. 

“So strange to see you this early, I know you treasure your sleep” Srefey teases, this made arachnid laugh. “Yes, well I am willing to sacrifice my precious sleep if it means to see you more”. 

Those words made srefey melt from the inside. Grabbing arachnids hands, he leads her somewhere more private as they snuggle together. Oh how they missed being in each other's embrace. Truly something they can't live without. 

“I miss holding you like this” Srefey confesses as he buries his head into arachnids neck, taking in her scent. The Earth of pandora and early morning mist is a lovely combination. Humming, Arachnid couldn't help but agree, “me too, I missed your big strong arms holding me. These past weeks have been endless tasks here and there”. 

Srefey couldnt help but nod, indeed it has. For some reason neteyam sully has given srefey more tasks to do, not that he minded but at times he questions why give him such silly duties when anyone can do them. And for arachnid, before she could even announce she is off, one of the four brothers would take her aside and say something along the lines of “you know temtem can't behave without you”. 

Or kamun saying “I need help looking for these herbs, grandmother says you know where to look”. 

Or thick head lo’ak practically begging arachnid and saying “Please help me sharpen the knives!! Just doing one takes forever and not every blade is the same!” 

And sweet adorable tik was also asking, close to demanding arachnid, “Let's go play at the fields! We never do that anymore! We can play your favorite games!” 

Each day one of them always has something for arachnid to do. And it takes away from her time with srefey. 

“I am courting you…yet it doesn't feel like that anymore” Srefey says in a whimper. It tugs the girl's heart seeing him like this. He should smile, not be sad. Gently strokes his ears, arachnid hums a tune. Srefey did say she had a lovely voice. 

And to srefey’s ears, arachnid can sing his sorrows away. Holding her tighter, he thinks of ways to spend time with her again. Because each day he begins to doubt and lose hope of a possible future with the girl he came to love. Srefey doesn't want to lose hope, does not wish to lose hope for arachnid. 

“How about…tomorrow? We do our tasks today, all of them. And have the whole day tomorrow just for us? No interruptions, no side tracks, nothing. Just you and me srefey” Arachnid suggests. Srefey looked at her with a new found hope and anticipation. Already looking forward to it, they agree on the time and spot. 

“Promise me you won't break our agreement?” Srefey asks. Arachnid can sense his doubts and nervousness. It wouldn't be the first time she had to cancel their meeting time. “I promise, I won't let anyone stop me from being with you”. 

Easier said than done. 

The following day arrived, no chores, no hunts, no nothing. The whole day is free to do any activities. A whole day of going anywhere at any time, doing whatever their hearts desired. The excitement of what to do fills the hearts of arachnid and srefey. Separately in their own homes, do they get ready. 

Srefey was the firs to arrive in the agreed spot. The sun was still rising from the horizon, giving color to his home. The anticipation filled his heart with joy. To see arachnid and have all her attention again was thrilling to think of. He prepared a small basket of their favorite fruits. And maybe a little gift. 

Of course he knew that the human base was a little away from the village, so it would make sense that arachnid would come a few minutes later. She does run very fast and can keep up with the speed of the na’vi. 

Besides, the day is barely beginning, there is time for the two. So he sits in a comfortable position, looking at the calm river that flows with color fishes that swim by. Won't be long now. 

8 hours later 

What hope Srefey had is now gone. Vanished. Sighing in defeat, he leaves. He should have known better. Arachnid is still human after all, and one of the things he hates about humans is how they can easily break a promise. He was a fool to think Arachnid was different. But she is like the rest. A liar and a deceit. 

Dropping the basket, he leaves in an angry huff. At this point he isn't even courting her, he should stop before he could get hurt anymore. A fool he feels, an utter fool.

Arachnid is a fool. An utter fool. To think it would just be a quick thing turned out to be lasting the whole day! 

“Arachnid come on! Don't you want to join us for dinner?” Lo’ak asks as he grabs her arm to which she was quick to yank back. “No, I have to find srefey. I messed up big time!” Panic surged into her. Thinking of the worst she makes a run for it to find srefey. But as she runs, she fails to see the satisfied look from her friends. 

“How long until he calls quits?” Tik asks as he holds neteyam’s hand. Lo’ak grins confidently, “Not long, since we had her for the whole day. I am betting he will break tonight. Might make her cry but we will be there to cheer her up”. 

Kamun turns to look at lo’ak concern all over his face, “make her cry? I don't like pushing her to the edge. What if we have gone too far?”. 

Lo’ak was quick to stare at his brother, “do you want to spend your days without her? To not have her around for our pranks and adventures? To not have her around and feel more lonely than ever?”. 

“Alright that is enough lo’ak, we all have the same goal alright? If srefey doesn't break it off we will try something else '' Neteyam cuts off a possible argument. But kamun was right, seeing arachnid cry is the last thing any of them wants. But if it is necessary to get their point across, then it will be a hard choice to make. 

Arachnid is someone the boys love as a sister. Someone they seem vulnerable to the world, she is strong and can stand her own, but pandora is still dangerous even for the na’vi. The need to protect her is a fierce emotion they all have equally, and only want what is best for her. And srefey, isn't not the best for their dear arachnid. 

They dont like how srefey has easily captured arachnids heart, taking her away from them. Not spending much time like she used to. 

“If it works, will she come back to us?” Tik asks, looking up at his siblings. Neteyam strokes his baby brother’s head as to comfort him, “that is right, it will be just like it was. And srefey will only be a bad memory”.

“Srefey!” Arahcnid calls out as she spotted him. From his stance she can tell he isn't happy, not one bit. She really messed up big time. Quickly going to him, carefully choosing the right words.

“Srefey, I am so so so sorry. I know I messed up, I d-”

“Didn't mean to take so long?” Srefey finished for her. His tone was way too calm, his eyes sharp as if piercing into her soul. Arachnid slowly reached out to touch him but he backed away. He really is pissed off. 

“You know…I am a fool to think you were special. That you are not like the sky demons, that maybe I have found what I longed for in you. But no, no you are not special, nothing unique. Just a walking demon that can't even pass as a na’vi. You are just like them all, a liar” 

Each word took a stab at arachnids heart, his anger rising making her fears rise as well. His warm eyes now burn in anger and hate. This isn't what she wanted. 

“Please, srefey, let me explain-” And again srefey had cut her words. 

“Explain what? That you lost track of time? That those friends of yours needed your help? That you couldn't say no to them? Explain what arachnid?!” Tears were ready to escape the poor boy’s eyes. His anger and sadness climbs up to his throat, anymore and he might say more harmful words. 

Arachnid however, she let her tears run like rivers. Her lips quivering and heart beating fast like a drum. This is exactly what she feared, to be rejected. To not be wanted by anyone. 

“S-srefey…” She tries to speak, but all the words were tangled in the back of her throat. Her mind and heart fight, trying to pick what to say to ease srefey, but she knows nothing will. 

A click of the tongue, srefey can't help but chuckle. “I am done, this courting isn't going anywhere. Burn the gifts, I want nothing associated with a sky demon. Farewell, demon” 

Without looking back, he leaves. 

And arachnid is left with her heart shattered, her eyes still glued to him as srefey’s body becomes smaller and gone. 

Never had arachnid cried so hard as she did that night. Running straight to the base and into her room, not bothering to give anyone an explanation. Not caring if Eywa heard her loud cries. Tears never stopped running, her heart never stopped hurting for the whole night. Not a moment of rest came to her. Srefey’s words repeated over and over in her mind.  

And that is how she stayed for days, not interacting with anybody. It made norm and others worry as she doesn't eat much or do anything. Just sit in her room. And that is when they call the sully family in hopes they could do something. 

Only the brothers responded with eagerness. 

While tight in the room, the four boys managed to sit comfortably as they sooth arachnid, trying their best to hide their victorious grins. 

“I am an idiot..he is right…I am a liar and a demon…” Arachnid muttered as Kamun and tik held her in their arms. Kamun gently pushed her braids aside, tucking them behind her ears. “Don't say that, srefey is the idiot. You are not a demon, you are our friend, sister, and more” Kamun tells Arachnid with the softness of his voice. 

“Yeah, who needs that skxawng? He wasnt good enough. Dont let him get to you” Lo’ak adds. And as more arachnid listens, the more she agrees. Perhaps srefey wasnt what she hoped for. Maybe he was like all the rest. 

She is fine without him. 

4 months later 

Arachnid was carrying a basket of sweets as she heads to the sully’s home. Smiling brightly as she makes her way. Ever since her terrible end with srefey, the sullys were there to comfort her. Make her feel better and always know how to lighten her mood. Always there when she needs them. 

So as she climbs, already excited to see their reaction of sweet treats, she hears the boys whispering. Silently, arachnid climbs and as quiet as she can. What are they talking about? 

“Hahaha! Can you believe it's been 4 months already? No doubt arachnid has already forgotten about that srefey” 

That was lo’ak, but why does he sound so smug? 

“Yes, and any attachments left are burned and turned to ashes. Look at her now, back to where she always belonged, with us” that was kamun. 

“It took a long time, but our plans worked. Purposely sabotaging their dates was executed to perfection” what the hell was neteyam talking about?! 

After the reveal, arachnid can't help but want to know what they did. Are they at fault for ruining her relationship with srefey!? 

“The hell you mean sabotaging the dates?!” arachnid shouted as she entered their home. It caught the boys by surprise, all quickly standing, their tails giving away how shocked they were. So now, they were all silent. 

“Well? Aren't you going to say anymore?!” the more silent they are, the angrier the arachnid got. 

“ANSWER ME!” 

“Lo’ak started it!!” Tik gave in. Seeing arachnid angry made her look just as scary as his mama. And a scary spider isn't something he wants. 

“H-he was the one who didn't like srefey in the first place!! He thought that if srefey didn't love you anymore, that you would come back to us! And then, Kamun and neteyam began to plan how to separate you from srefey!” Tik confessed as he let the words slip out of his mouth. 

With a sharp glare, arachnid turned to look at lo’ak, who couldn't look at her in return. “Really lo’ak? What the hell is going on in that thick head of yours!?” arachnid shouted again, demanding really. 

“Well what the hell did you think!? You were spending more time with him than with us! We just wanted you to be hanging out with us. You always do. And that skaxwng thought too highly of himself and began to court you. Who the hell does he think he is?!” 

Lo’ak had enough and began to bark back with his confession. Arachnid left out a scoff, does he really think he is in the right? 

Then she turned to Kamun who wore an expression of guilt. 

“And you went along with it? Tik I get he gets easily impressionable but you!? It is you who gets lo’ak out of trouble not dive head first! What were you thinking!?” 

Kamun scratched the back of his head, guilt breaking him already. “What I thought was best! We missed having you with us. And the thought of seeing you go with that guy, or anyone. I hate it!” 

Groaning deeply, she turns to neteyam whom she was surprised by the most. “Neteyam, you are the oldest of your siblings! You are supposed to be the logic! The brains! Letting lo’ak dig his words into you is beyond me. But you are just as stupid as the rest of them. I can't believe you went along with it and planned it out!! 

Neteyam couldn't say anything as he hung his head down in shame. 

Look at all four now, her anger just keeps rising. 

“When I was crying, when I was heartbroken and depressed, were you all happy that I dug in my misery? Crying, thinking that no one would love me? Was that your sick satisfaction? To see me break down?! And for what?! For you to pick up my pieces thinking only you four can have my attention. Ugh I swear you are all fucking stupid! I can't even begin to describe what I am feeling right now!” 

Walking back and forth, breathing deeply trying to calm herself. 

“Haven't you thought for one damn second that maybe I was happy with srefey? That I reciprocate his feelings for me? That I loved him as much? Only to be turned down thinking it was MY fault when really, it is all of your faults! And srefey! Great mother of all, srefey dealt with it the hardest! Creating all these gifts, spending time to prove his worth! And you fuckers ruined it! Well congratulations! You won! You win, but guess what? I am done. I am done with all of you. I cant anymore” 

Out of breath and dropping her hands, she starts to climb down. None of the boys went to stop her. Knowing that if they did, it will make things much worse. Letting arachnids' words sink in. More guilt and shame washed over them. Regret for what they done. Its true, they have won. 

But at what cost? 

Arachnid ran fast, faster than she ever did in her life. Now that she knows what really happened, why she was kept from being with srefey, who is to stop her now? 

Still remembering srefey’s routine, she headed straight to the river bank of the south. He loved going there to collect fresh water and herbs. And 4 months later, she is glad it hasn't changed. 

Down, near the river, arachnid saw srefey collecting some plants. A new found excitement flowed in her. Quickly, she goes down to talk to him. 

“Srefey!” she calls him. 

Sregey turned, and was surprised to see arachnid.  But it wasn't a happy surprise. He still hasnt forgotten what happened. 

“Go away” he tells in an impatient tone. 

“Please, I want to talk to you,” Arachnid pleaded. 

“I dont, you should go back with the other demons. I have nothing else to say to you” Srefey replies, his patience getting thin by the second. But arachnid was determined. 

“Srefey, if you just let me-”

“STOP!” Was all he said. Glaring daggers down at her. 

Taking a deep breath, she still goes on. 

“Please…if you hear me out, just this once. Listen to what I have to say, what you want to do after is your choice. If you don't want to see me, that is fine. Just please srefey…I need to tell you something” 

Their eyes meet and srefey can't help but soften just a bit. He did miss the color of her beautiful eyes. 

“Fine, speak” he gives in. 

Arachnid wasted no time. She began to explain what happened, and who was the culprits behind the constant interruptions of their dates. 

“They did all of that just to stop us from seeing each other??” Srefey asked. After hearing what Arachnid said, he couldn't help but feel….funny? 

The determination the sully’s had was admirable and give them some credit for not giving up. 

“Yes, and after cussing out at them I ran to find you and here we are��I am still mad at them. But I can't ignore them forever. I don't even know if their father can help fix their mess” Arachnid comments as she tugs a bit of her hair. 

Srefey does feel relieved that there was a reason behind the whole thing. 

Placing a hand on her small shoulder, he brings arachnid to face him. “I am sorry….for saying those terrible things to you. I regret it all. You must have felt the world crashing down on you” he says in a low tone. Arachnid looks down at her hands, tracing her painted stripes. 

“It did…made me think it was all my fault. That I couldn't do anything right no matter how hard I tried. That nothing I could do would be enough. That I will never be enough for you” 

Her words brought more guilt to srefrey. But perhaps…a new bloom can begin anew? 

“I know so much has happened but…what if….we start again? Start all over, and hopefully, this time, no one standing in our way?” Srefey asks. He won't deny, after months of not seeing arachnid, despite what he believed. He missed her so much. A lot of things reminded him of her. And now that he knew that arachnid was never at fault, he was ready. 

“You…you want to court me again?” Arachnid asks hesitantly. Hoping she didn't misheard him. 

And srefey nods, “yes. Yes I want to court you, and I will be better, if you allow me this chance?” 

“YES!” 

In a swift move, she jumped into his big arms. Engulfing her small frame, he holds her close. Damn, he forgot how small arachnid really is. Taking her in her scent, it brought back so many reasons why he liked her in the first place. 

“I missed you holding me like this” arachnid said close to his ear. His tail twitching happily, yes, he missed it too. 

“Come on, let's start anew. We can go to the up planes like we used to. Ride on my pali and eat as much fruit as we want” srefey suggests. Already thinking of many dates ahead of them. 

“Yes, I would like that” Arachnid agrees. 

Holding hands, forgetting of what he was doing, they go off to a new start of their official courting. 

But one thing still remains in question. 

“What about your friends? What will you tell them?” Srefey asks. 

Arachnid hums a bit in thought, “I am still mad at them. But, I think it is them that needs to think of their actions. It really was a sucker move from them. All of them. So, I will give them a day or two and talk to them. Things can end like how it did. But for now, I just want to make up the lost time with you”. 

New happiness bloomed in srefey’s heart. 

“Yes, and I with you. There is much to catch up on, and much more to explore” 

Aaaaaaand that is it for this one! I hoped everyone likes it! Took me forever berceuse of constant rewrites. Until next time, see ya!

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Srefey = expect

[mortuarywriting]

If I outline what the fuck i wanna see in my self indulgent au will it give me the kick in the ass to write it.

Obviously relative spoiler/high notes/plot points below

The premise is, so far, nobody has seen where Simon lives. As far as they- they being Gaz, Soap, and Price- know he has a flat in Manchester.

Well leaving base one night(ish, time negotiable), the road they were all taking in their separate vehicles is closed due to a nasty accident. Gonna be blocked for 24 hours kinda mess.

So Ghost offers to let them all stay at his place, if only for a bit or the night if they prefer

Everyone just kinda. Well this isn't what we were expecting but alright. So they follow his car, it's pissing down rain and you can't see shit before you but the tail lights you're following but they've committed and by the time they pull off the road they're fuckin nowhere. House is fairly isolated, separate garage building, coop in the backyard, and a thatch roof cottage. Whose Nan's attic is Simon living in???

Except, not a random old biddie. Just a random fat American?? It's obvious they're familiar enough with each other, giving each other shit and that there's a whole "you got back from a mission here is our you came home routine"

Whole mess. The group stays the night because now they're nosy and wanna find out what the relationship is. You both say roommates. They don't wholly believe that.

Simon and roomie sleep downstairs, he can't sleep in a bed yet after the mission and roomie makes sure there's enough background noise that he doesn't snap into combat mode everything is about to go to shit.

Next morning roomie and Simon team up to make a hodge podge of all kinds of breakfast food and between them all there are no leftovers. Concerns are had if everyone ate enough (and then biscuits and gravy settled).

Its back to routine and roomie goes out to grocery shop to stock back up on "i need to feed myself and a whole ass army dude" levels of food and snackies.

While Simon is trying to get Soap and Gaz to stop making excuses to stick around (all good-natured fun) there is a call. Roomie prefaces this with they're fine!!! But uh. They did get hit by a car. A bit. Enough that there has to be a report. Come get the groceries?

And this is the part where they find out Simon and roomie are married. Have been for y e a r s. Technically the town knows them under roomie's last name as a couple.

After the dust is settled and everyone is back at the cottage the explaining happens. Yes, they're married. Vegas happened. It's been a long time and they kinda glossed over the whole "he's a dead man" legal bit for it. Roomie still gets married rights. How do you think he has a lease as a dead man roomie legitimately wants to know. The cottage is in their name, his isn't on it to keep it all off the record if people come knocking for him.

(He does actually have a Manchester flat, though. Landlord takes cash payments however many months at a time and doesn't ask questions. Roomie gets mail from it every once in a blue moon.)

Relationship is largely "we're married but for tax benefits"esque because they're both some flavor of ace. If he's in town roomie checks on if he wants to go to the Saturday munches or not but that's sir not appearing in this fic.

But yeah. Just fun self indulgence.

Could go write the Vegas bit. Write work "being brought home". Bonding activities. List of things for when he retires. Potentially kidnapping. S o many fun options but I just. Gotta write it.