#and howdy's ad was so fucking funny

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

LOOK AT THE BOI!!!! THEY JUST ANNOUNCED IT!!!

I KNOWWWWWWW HE'S SO CUTE I NEED HIM IN MY HOUSE. BITING HIM BITING HIM BITING HIM

[lovelyrotter]

I read your thing about stridercest. I didn’t super like the ship (I’m more of a lalondecest girlie) but I respect the hell out of the textual analysis you did. Anyway do you have any good fic recommendations? I want to see what you see in it.

oh fuck yeah i love sharing ship stuff especially with ppl who dont usually go here and vice versa for me. its like hell yeah im digging in sand and its fun i love my sand and then i turn around and woah i had no idea there was even MORE sand just behind me ya dig? that might not have made any sense hahaha. its the joy of trading pokemon cards except with ships

but okay heres some of my current faves. bear in mind i read mostly M and E rated stuff but ive got a sprinklin of lower ratings in here too. im also gonna categorize this list by stridercest flavour. theres a lot so this turned out like ridiculously long

anyone else goin through this feel free to link yalls faves in the replies too cause im ravenous. especially if its haldirk. im constantly craving haldirk

guardiancest

doku line terminus & two steps away from the county line by lildogie these first cause theyre my ultra faves rn and i cant get enough of this au. set in the same universe but county line is the prequel. a/b/o verse with lotsa interesting political stuff and also interpersonal dynamics. dave & dirk are there too and are real cute. its also got mysterious time travelling. i really cant sell these two enough like i am not doin these justice

davedirk / dirkdave

if i woke up next to you by bumbly | G, ~2,700 words, complete. SUPER sweet relationship study, made me fuckin melt. this author has really good stuff for other ships too but mind the archive warnings

dont joke about hentai face broctopus transplants im eating cheese n onion pringles here by smrtnik | M, ~1k words, complete. this one made me fuckin melt its so tender. it truly feels like were peeking into their life together. also great title

Stasis State by Caeslin | T, ~3k words, complete. another really intimate feeling one. its so fuckin sweet. mind the tags for typical dirk suicide attempt but its not on screen its moreso the recovery and how dave is affected by it

“stupid fucking bullshit” ad nauseam by anon | T, 13.7k words, complete. REALLY GOOD AU. trans striders, fade to black sex scene. the boys are cute and you can feel how much theyre drawn to each other immediately. wish there was more of this

sometimes the bad guy wins by nutrimercenary | E, ~7.5k words, ongoing. wow. oh wow. ive been looking for a davedirk fic like this for a long time. PLEASE read the warnings and tags but its so fuckin good. a crossdimentional narrative tug-o-war between dave and ult dirk i fuckin love it

got it goin on by bumbly | E, 7.5k words, complete. dirk indulges daves mommy kink after prying it outta him. its cute and funny and sexy it made me smile. their dynamic is sooo sweet

helping hands by ghostlyAnarchist | E, 5.1k words, complete. THIS IS SO GOOD. its got trans man dave and is genuinely one of the hottest transmasc fics ive read so far and boy howdy ive read a lot. slight warning for dysphoria discussion but its not too bad its all just hot af a dick-sucking venn diagram by Elendraug | E, 10k words, complete. first off domestic af. very established relationship and you can tell. its so fuckin sweet. i looove this one. its like the best kind of silly realistic smut its one of my faves of all time

STILL WITH ME by egbert | E, 8k words, complete. dave and dirk strife and then fuck in the bathroom. holy shit this is hot. their want is like tangible in this one

brodave and a!brodirk

hardware by orphan_account | E, ~8k words, complete. dave gets some dick piercings and bro goes insane about them. hot as hell and also features bottom bro which is my fave. its got a couple uses of the r-slur but its also from 2011 so i take it w/ a grain of salt. 2011 and earlier fics are like internet artifacts (/pos)

but you better never pull it by hapaxlegomena | E, 5k words, complete. wow. WOW. sub top bro and dom bottom dave need i say more. this sub bro activates my cute aggression the power play is great mars & murrie's by orphan_account | E, 6.8k words, complete. a!brodirk, omorashi. super hot!!!! alpha dave is sooo embarrassed about his piss kink but dirk wins in the end hahaha. really intriguing which i know sounds funny on an omo fic but read it and youll know. i love this alpha dave

temporal sunset by Plajus | M, 19.5k over 5 chapters, complete. a!brodirk. holy shit what a ride. this one held me hostage and now lives in my brain rent free (bdum tiss sorry). dirk is terminally ill so i know it wont be for everyone but give it a try and goddamn you wont be disappointed. trust me

a swinging pendulum by ghostlyAnarchist | T, ~900 words, complete. a!brodirk time/dream bubble encounter. wow just wow. the want. the yearning immaterial by LPSunnyBunny | E, 1k words, complete. a!brodirk, trans dirk. holy shit!!!!!! holy shit!!!!! hot hot hot!!!!!!! shower sex sensation control!!!!

haldirk

singular by 2x2verse | E, 6.8k words, complete. hal has an existential crisis dirk catches him and then they fuck tenderly about it. genuinely so romantic. im addicted to this kind of haldirk. honestly i just recommend the entire series diagnostics by 2x2verse | E, 2.9k words, complete. i know i just linked this authors whole collection of haldirk fics but holy crap this one in particular. dom/sub electrostim with sensory deprivation, hal is the dom. i LOVE how hes written here. very attentive domming, great details

A Fatal Error Has Occurred by Mortior | E, 42k words, 4/5 chapters. oh mortior my haldirk regent. really fuckin good character writing in an au where hal has an android body before the alpha session is started. read the tags for warnings. the tension between them is insane endangered by Mortior | E, 100k+ words, complete multichapter. holy fuck where to begin with this one. this is a haldirk sensation. post apocalyptic au where androids won the human-robot war. dirk runs into AR. AR takes an interest in him. dirk takes even more of an interest in AR. if youre gonna read any haldirk read this one

"im basically fucking him" series by Elendraug | T & E, all complete. so!!!!! fucking!!!!! tender!!!!! really cute haldirk progressing through their relationship

ridiculously late by cinnamonfreak | E, 21k, completed multichapter. a/b/o au where dirk suddenly presents. REALLY intriguing hal in this one i fuckin love the power play

roboporn by smrtnik | E, 3.9k words, complete. really fun power play in this one. hal is waterproofed externally but not internally. he gives dirk a handie over his open chassis torso. theres also really sweet snuggling afterwards

[farthertothemoon]

A few questions about Rari because I love his fat fuckin thighs him a totally normal amount:

1. What are his buildups like? Long? Short? Vocal? Silent? Big guy probably needs some sorta warning that you’re about to be in the literal line of fire. (Granted, it would also be pretty funny if they just snuck up on him. Poor dude)

2. Can he hold back effectively if he needed to? If not I volunteer as tribute to help him out. (Though I’m not sure how much help I’d be with his sensitive snoot.)

3. How does he feel about his sneezes? Based off of that VERY sexy clipped image of him teasing his party mate, I would guess he’s not too sensitive about it; but, I figured having a slightly destructive sneeze would make for some embarrassing situations.

4. WHY THE FUCK DID YOU HIDE HIM FROM US FOR SO LONG!?! /j

4. Is her sensitive to perfumes or other strong smells?

Thank you for your absolutely tasty art and patience with my long ass questions! Here’s a cookie! 🍪

Howdy Anon!! (is that you Rari Anon? Or are we adding another to the Rari cult?) No need to cross it out, I love his fat fuckin thighs too ;) ~ but woah look at all these questions! And this is a good woah, thank you so much for all of these!!

1. He's got a range of buildups when it comes to those literally hot sneezes of his. When his sneezes come about from random occurrence, he's got short, but vocal buildups that are loud enough to let people in the immediate vicinity know "uh oh, time to skedaddle!" before that series of fiery sneezes is released. When it's caused by his allergies, pollen to be exact, he has long, breathy buildups that start out silent, but get more and more vocal the closer his sneezes get to coming out. He hates Spring because it always takes him near a full minute of building up to sneeze (unless of course someone were to help him speed it up :3). When it comes to his dust allergy, he has a much shorter and more silent buildup, the only sound being two or three big breaths and his left foot repeatedly stamping the ground in anticipation. And finally, his feather allergy. Hoo boy. The big man doesn't even get so much as a second of buildup if a feather comes close to his poor sensitive nose, let alone touches it (god forbid get stuck in a nostril). One second he's fine, the next, a flurry of fiery sneezes so rapid you wouldn't think there'd be any real power behind them (you'd be wrong. So wrong.) are erupting out of him like a volcano. Oh and before I move on! His sick sneezes! Similar to his feather sneezes, he doesn't get much warning at all, but thankfully he doesn't produce much, if any fire when sick, meaning the only thing you need to avoid is a face full of spray and mess (unless you're into that, then don't avoid it :3)

2. Holdbacks. It really depends on what's bothering his sensitive snoot (cute choice of words anon >:3). Pollen allergies, he can hold back if need be. Dust allergies are much more difficult for him to hold back and he'll probably need your help there ;)~. Feathers? Nope. No chance. You'd probably have a better chance stopping a semi truck hurtling towards you at 70 mph (~113 kph) with your body. If you tried, prepare to look like Ash Ketchum after his fire type Pokemon set him on fire in the original anime lmao- As for his sick sneezes, they do sneak up on him because he's so out of it, but if you're watching him, you can help him hold back. When sick, his nose will often start violently twitching and flaring a second before he sneezes. If you're quick enough, you can pinch his nose, push a finger up to that adorable septum, or just completely cover and hold his nose (though you'll have to keep a good hold on it if you do that, it gets very twitchy when you hold him back :3).

3. Before discovering the kink, he didn't much mind his sneezes except for when something catches fire and causes quite a bit of embarassment. He's so used to sneezing that it's near unconscious to try and sneeze in a direction that will cause the least damage. However, upon discovering the kink, he began to see his sneezes in a much different light. Not at all embarrassed about them of course, but enjoying how they feel, how they make others with the kink feel, that kinda stuff. He turned into a real sneeze slut huh? As for the aforementioned destructive sneezes, well, he he gets very embarrassed with those, before and after discovering the kink. Going back to the feather pillow tavern incident from the last ask, he had forgotten to ask what kind of bedding is used. Upon reaching his room, his nose was already twitching, but he played it off as simple dust tickling his nose (oh how wrong he was). Upon lying down in the bed, he only had a couple seconds before his poor sensitive snoot (I love that term for him hehe) was erupting with huge fiery sneezes, leading to his party pulling him out of the tavern, still sneezing. As said before, everybody in the tavern made it out safely, but it was safe to say that Rari was thoroughly embarassed and guilty towards having burned down the tavern-hotel. He then had to do 3 months of community service to pay for the rebuilding of the tavern.

4. I'M SORRYYYYY I SET A PRECEDENT WITH MY OTHER CHARACTERS AND I THOUGHT NOBODY WOULD LIKE HIM, I APOLOGIZE FOR MY SINS 😭

4. That's a great question actually! He is in fact sensitive to various perfumes, especially those with wood like scents. The woody scented ones are often so potent that it'll have his nose flushing purple-blue, nostrils flaring, and eyes watering really very quickly :3~ He's also slightly sensitive to various cleaning agents. Not enough to make him sneeze on its own, but if you happen to "accidentally" touch that already twitchy snoot? Well... Prepare for a brilliant light show :3

We did it!! That was honestly so fun answering those questions, thank you so much for asking the questions in the first place! (I hope there aren't any egregious typos, misspelled words, bad grammar, etc in there because I am NOT editing this /lh)

Oh and also: gasp what a coincidence! I have a cookie for you too! 🍪 Thank you very much for yours :3

Always feel free to ask as many long as questions as you want!

[carmenized-onions]

Bonjour my friend!! I’m back and bringing in my thoughts from Tony, Terry, Tommy. I’m going to go chronologically through my (ungodly) reread.

- What if it’s a love or murder confession? What if it’s about the money you owe her? The money she owes you?

- Squidny lovers rise! I’m now noticing all the seeds you’ve planted.

- You figure either the dinner rush is starting to slow down or she’s relieved you’re coming. Who are you being humble for, no shot it’s the former.

- Tony please my heart can’t take it. Ugh the self depreciation. The no one is my friend and I am no good to this place. My heart how it breaks.

- Ginger’s Theory: money owed + three years no contact with Syd + significance of chip 3 (years/months sober?). Could Syd have unknowingly given Tony drug money. Oh man. Okay. I’m adding that into my notes app to toggle around with.

- “Good to see you. I want to catch up, f’real, but—” “The bear in the walk-in?” “The bear in the walk-in.”

- this is hilarious 10/10

- Walking past Donna and Pete’s breakdown. I’m interested to see if/how this might comes back around.

- “Dad knew him, so then I knew him, so then I occasionally fixed shit for him. Shit that ‘Fak couldn’t?’ I think his name was?”

- This line!!! It comes back!!!! And Carm was listening. Oh my goodness your brain!!

In reading back through my thoughts I realized I didn’t introduce myself.

Howdy hi I’m Ginger!

Have a great day friend!

HELLO FRIEND THIS IS SO EXCITING I'M LOOKIN FORWARD TO THE UNGODLY REREAD!! The next chapter will hopefully be coming out sometime next week, maybe Monday night, and I will say, if you're a bitch for call backs and mirrored moments like I am, this is a very good time to reread, for this next chapter specifically.

Honestly Something To Do had a fuck ton of past moments, too, so really just an overall good time for a reread hehe. Anyways LETS CRACK IN!!

I've planted so many SquidInk seeds, I think i've said it somewhere else before, but it bares repeating, back when I was conceptualizing this series I thought of it being a Syd/Readers series, because I thought gay mechanic would be. so fucking fun. And I think a little part of me truly never let that completely go LMAO.

I wrote a whole paragraph explaining what No shot means because i was worried this Canadian-ism made the sentence seem like Tony thought the dinner rush was slowing down-- No, everyone did get that, it's just that she debated it in the first place, was what was concerning. My poor bug.

I will close my EYES looking at this theory for now. But I'll come back to it, after this next chapter, I think. We'll see.

THE BEAR IN THE WALK INNNN; I've started saying Bear in the Walk-in in lieu of elephant in the room with my friends, it's always confusing and always extremely funny 10/10

I still have to fuckin' figure out what to do with Donna. No spoilers but Season 3 through me for a loop I WASN'T expecting and now I have to. actually think. with my brain. this is hell.

Again, You're in for such a treat, if you catch these little come back moments!! There's a lot of them. There's honestly a handful that I didn't do on purpose and when people point them out I go Oh My God You're a Genius. We're BOTH geniuses. I'm excited to see what genius sticks out to you!!

And now it's bedtime for me I gotta go sleep so i can go hang out with my nephews tommorow because YES I DO BASE A LOT OF TONY'S EXPERIENCES OFF OF MY OWN ALRIGHT ? SO WHAT IF I GOT MY NEPHEW A PETER RABBIT BOOK AND THE OTHER ONE A TEETHING STUFFY? SHUT UP!!! ART IMITATES LIFE SHHHH!!!

[indecisive-dizzy]

Hi I have ideas for both the Spider Daisey au and the Phineas and Ferb au!

Firstly, I keep thinking about prom in the spider daisey au. Like,,, how would they dress? Who would they take? Would they even go? MY BRAIN IF FULL OF THEM :,>

I think Daisey and Howdy would maybe go together depending on when in the timeline it happens. Julie and Eddie go together but they drift off to their collectible partners/people they actually wanted to go with (cough Frank cough)

For Phineas and Ferb au, I’m kinda imagining a role for Lizzy and Daisey in this au (not canon to your au cause I don’t wanna just plop my ocs in there without permission ^^)

Lizzy takes Vanessa’s place in the au, so she’s Howdy’s adopted daughter

She’s the same age as Poppy and the two get along well besides the whole agent and villain’s daughter thing

She usually spends the day with Uncle Latter or Auntie Seeya, much to Howdy’s annoyance (specifically at Latter)

I think Howdy does care, but his asshole-ness tends to get in the way of him actually showing it

Either way, they’re family and they care about each other in the end, even if they have a very funny way of showing it

Daisey, on the other hand, is Howdy’s assistant/minion (in his words)

They’re either super evil or just an assistant that is treated really poorly but somehow still cared enough to work with Howdy (I’m leaning towards the evil one)

They’re more of the level headed one, keeping his ego in check but also making sure he doesn’t do something absolutely stupid to fuck up their plans

Maybe’s in love with him, probably not tbh. I can see it being implied during the episodes but never fully shown. Probably jokes about them being together are there but it’s mostly implied or comedic

That or Daisey is Howdy’s ex wife (since Doof canonically has an ex wife)

How he ended up with a wife I will never know

Teehee, I’m thinking too much now i need to draw prom dresses

Eddie and Julie def go to prom together but their outfits noticeably Do Not match. (Eddie and Frank are matching tho <3) Drag Eddie lives in a special part of my brain so all I can think of is Eddie wearing a prom dress I'm not sorry. Imagine Eddie and Julie pulling up together and he's in a dress while she's got a suit UGH <3

Ya know I had Howdy's nephews as my semi Vanessa stand in(s) lol but adding Lizzy can make some fun moments between her and Poppy! It would be hilarious if they went to high school together,,

Poppy's in a trap and Lizzy walks in like "Wait don't I know you? Omg you're the girl who sits in the back of like every class! What's with the fedora? And the Trap? ... Daaaaadd!"

Howdy is frozen like wtf Poppy The Partridge goes to school with my child?? Howdy this whole time thought Poppy was at least 19 bc girl is Tall lol

Lizzy, Howdoo, and Youdoo teaming up to get Howdy to reschedule his evil scheme bc they want to see a movie or something jahdjahd

Howdy somewhat cares I think,, his ego is just far too inflated to show it with anyone but his nephews and occasionally Seeya. (and Lizzy in what I'm calling the oc spinoff)

Daisey being the ex spouse is hilarious I'm sorry Maybe they kinda regret the divorce, but Howdy was getting Too Much and until he's sufficiently humbled there's not a chance they'll get back together.

But Also Daisey being the henchman is funny to,, Ooo taking inspo from 2nd dimension here! what if they're still married and Daisey is evil, but they stay out of it bc they'd rather focus on their (evil) garden or something lol. evil spouse!

[go-to-the-mirror]

i think it's absolutely rigged that this episode falls on april fools day actually. APRIL FOOLS! everything is still awful actually

Hi howdy this episode is so sad :( I'm so sad constantly about this episode. this episode. :( can't wait until the FUN season 5 bits where it's like they're GAY and there are so many ANALOGIES! instead we just have to wallow in sadness for a bit. so upset!! aa!!

Anyway yeah, lets go. I think when I listened to it at first I was really upset that I was at the end, like I was thinking "oh no I'm nearly at the end" back with 151. I still haven't listened to goodbye for now because it just makes me really sad that my favourite podded cast is over. I mean, good thing it's not now, but I still don't think I can make myself listen to it. I did put off MAG 200 for a while, and then when I actually did listen to it I immediately read Citrus' (CirrusGrey) fics about it.

Which, speaking of, it's season 5 time!!! Fuck dude it sure is! Not only a relisten, but a reread of all Citrus' fantastic fics!! YEAH!!! Ok, ok, ok, getting on with it now.

@a-mag-a-day

MARTIN You had- rum and raisin, and taught us all about emulsifiers.

He has the ice cream taste of a grandmother. Oh, also, funny story. So, we were getting ice cream, right, and I saw rum and raisin, and I got really upset, because Jon Sims had rum and raisin ice cream, and also the world ended. I don't- everything is a TMA reference with me, once someone asked me to open the door and I started laughing, because Jon Sims opened a door.

It's... very... odd.

JONAH MAGNUS (AS ELIAS) Knock knock.

Killing and maiming. I hate him so much. Die. Fucking die.

JONAH He didn’t have to. Nothing escapes my notice, and I like to keep an eye out for this sort of thing.

This guy is COMICALLY evil. like, not only does he end the world, but he ruins a cake surprise? why is he such a bastard?

ARCHIVIST Uh- thirty-eight.

HE JUST ADDED TEN YEARS ONTO HIS AGE HE'S SO FUCKING STUPID <3

TIM, SASHA, MARTIN (Crosstalk) -Jon. JONAH (Crosstalk) -Archivist.

WHY??? Literally, like, why, why, why is he like this, why, why??? Why did he do that? Why is he such an asshole? Why.

Why.

why.

ARCHIVIST If I wish for you all to go away, do you think it’ll work?

WHY ARE WE GETTING HIT WITH THE DRAMATIC IRONY BUS? WHY? "If I wish for you all to go away, do you think it'll work" STOP NO, WHY, WHYYYY...

it just makes me really sad.

ARCHIVIST I can’t tell you.

Your honour I am holding him gently.

JONAH He wished for a little bit of peace and quiet.

It's one thing to manipulate someone into ending the world, it's quite another to SHARE THEIR WISH? Dude. Why is he like this? This does nothing for him? He has taken one of Jon's only happy memories from working at the hell that's called an archive and twisted it into "oh boy, look at all that pain." For no fucking reason except to be evil. Killing and murder.

MARTIN Oh! Uh, (slight laugh) I mean- I don’t- normally- drink wine, you know- t-tannins are a proven headache trigger, and so-

Ooh! Fun fact! Rooibos tea has low tannin compared to other tea, therefore, Martin drinks rooibos tea, I make the rules.

TIM Oh! Yeah! I- just thought it might be nice, you know, something to look back on when we’re all old and sick of each other.

WHY. WHY. WHY.

"When we're all old and sick of each other" THEYRE NEVER GONNA GET OLD AND SICK OF EACH OTHER THEYRE ALL GOING TO DIE. THEYRE ALREADY DEAD AND THEY DONT EVEN KNOW IT. IM GOING TO CRY NOW.

ARCHIVIST (Crosstalk) (Under his breath) Oh, hypocrite.

I hate that it sounds friendly, like they're getting annoyed at each other in a friendly way, that Jon is friends with Tim and Sasha. Hate it. So much. Headinhands.

TIM (Crosstalk) Alright, alright, fine, look. I’m turning it off. Any last words for your future selves? ARCHIVIST Yes. Fire Tim!

ARHRRHGGGHGH </3

[Pause with clothing rustles]

CLOTHING RUSTLES!!!!! 🏳️‍🌈

ARCHIVIST It’s not- (struggling) you’re not the one who ended the world. (Archivist breath shows he’s close to tears)

Oh my god leave me alone. Stop it! Stop it!! It's just. Like. Christ. Oh my god. Oh my god. I can't even word properly, I just want to give him a hug, I just want him to be okay. Fuck, dude.

Why's jonny such a good voice actorrrr :(

MARTIN Are we still safe? ARCHIVIST Y-Yes. It- It doesn’t want to harm me. MARTIN And me? ARCHIVIST I won’t let it.

I like the way Jon's voice is in the "it doesn't want to harm me." Like it's sort of vaguely hysterical.

ARCHIVIST I’m just- I’m mourning a world I killed- MARTIN (Placating) I know- ARCHIVIST (Increasingly fervent) and we’re all trapped in its rotting corpse!-

I like this bit a lot. I think it's neat. I'm gay and I like rot. I need to read... what was it, thirteen stories I think? That's got the rot. I like the rot. 10/10 on the rot. Like hnmmn what Jane Prentiss says about the dead god, a world that was alive, was sentient, now dead, rotting with maggots and flies all over it, flesh squishy and yielding but also firm at the same time like a bruised apple, trapped on an actually dead corpse of a world.

That would be neat!!

ARCHIVIST Can you imagine? If we’d had this? MARTIN But we didn’t though, did we. ARCHIVIST No— MARTIN So there’s no point in dwelling.

ooOOOoooh title drop

but also... </3 like he could have kept them. he could have not done that. he could have not put the fucking solution to everything right after it becomes moot.

stabbing.

ARCHIVIST Healthy? I am an Avatar of voyeuristic terror, who unquestioned craving for knowledge has condemned the entire world to an eternity of torment; healthy i-isn’t- i,it’s not

I've written this so much on like every test, it lives in my mind rent free, it's hhnrnhrnnh holding it gently <3 like i don't even know what to say, this is a far cry from the whole mag 160 thing where it lived in my head rent free and so does a lot of words about it, here it's just... a lot of reaction images.

ARCHIVIST Why not? It- It’s quiet, here, and I have you.

ARHGHHGHHH

<333

ARCHIVIST No, it’s- I love you, I just— I need more time.

headinhands (good)

AND ALRIGHT CITRUS' FIC FOR TODAY IS SEVEN SLEEPS! WHICH I REALLY LIKE IT AND ITS JUST LIKE ITS JUST LIKE I KNEW WHAT I WAS SIGNING UP FOR, I KNEW WHAT THE OUTCOME WOULD BE, I KNEW WHAT WOULD HAPPEN. and like the whole bloody season it's just like it's just :( CITRUS ::::(((

read it. it's so good.

[samsspambox]

WIP Asks!

So... untitled nxx fic?

hey howdy hey!

oh the untitled nxx one is gonna be so fun too! similar to the guide series (which, actually, i might as well lump it there cuz it is gonna be a guide in a sense) that was inspired by a conversation i had with zak a couple of nights back and the idea grew on me.

rn i only have the opening (mainly so i don't forget the premise) but its the unspoken rules of the nxx! like not fucking with vyn's tea. i was thinking of having davis present the rules (or suggestions) to mc and mc doesn't believe the ridiculous rules at first but comes to figure out that they're there for a reason. (and her adding rules for luke, bc who else but her knows the ins and outs of luke pearce?)

thats one direction it can go, or the other where davis just observes them like animals in enclosures and makes field notes LMAOOO (this would then be added to the error 102 series if i go that route)

they all have their very interesting quirks and that's why they clash and i just find that so funny like,,, one that i keep thinking of is 'never explain the lawyer exam to vyn, he will try to one-up artem' bc im a bitch for a two degrees joke jsdkbsjjk

thank you for asking!

[lookedlikethebins]

oohhh that fic was so ☹️ i love how you've described matty worrying while still trying to convince himself that it's nothing, and how they're both interacting with the kids in all of it:(( george trying his very best to be enthusiastic and act like hes okay and matty just being so stressed IM SICK.

this bit is also BEAUTIFUL and its making my heart hurt <3

“Is there… anything else you need to tell me?” Matty knew how quickly a simple, disregarded depressed mood could sink into a trench of depression. How it could turn into nihilism and ideation of a world without himself; a world where he wasn’t made to sit and watch everyone else living in it.

“No. No,” George’s thumbs ran over the peak of Matty’s cheekbones. Reassurance when his voice was too flat, too heavy, to lift. “Nothing like that.”

nothing like that:((((( IM GONNA CRY. i love this sososo much!!!<3

howdy! i'm so sorry for taking so long to answer this incredibly thoughtful ask-- I've been trying to figure out what to say! this is so kind and feels like just such high praise omg thank you SO much!! i really wobbled while writing even just this first part of the fic and then to just decide fuck it and post it, and then to get such wonderful responses like This is just so encouraging thank you

and actually what's funny is the "nothing like that." part was added during my final proofread, just in a last second reworking! most times those details i add are just sort of There and more necessary than anything of note, but when people notice them in their read it always feels a bit special. i know there was no way for you to know that but still, thank you all the same :)

hope to keep things up (or rather, down, emotionally lol) in ch2!

[littleladymab]

FebruarOC - Sam

At least, we have made it to the (technically) main character of the 07 Nano Project! (For him being the main character I sure don't write about him a lot) 

The original conceit of the story was an isekai in which sam somehow ends up in this other world and at the end has to go back home (I had done loose plotting for a like, afterword story, not a sequel strictly speaking but an extended epilogue?? that was a lot of Ky coping with him being gone and her place restored, and Beryl and Ren not really knowing how to handle that because of their own circumstances). I think I would eliminate the "he's from earth" aspect, but then I did really like his absence at the end of it. Maybe it will have to end with some kind of sacrifice? Hmm! 

He was, at home, an incredibly normal boy. Which is just extremely isekai isn't it, now that i think about it??? I wrote them all really young, I don't remember why -- i think I wanted to be able to lean into the horror for younger audiences so of the main cast, Sam was the youngest (14); he was technically in middle school still (8th grade) because he ended up repeating a year after his dad died (he got sick and it was terminal) and Sam would say that was the most interesting thing about him. He also liked to play soccer!

Then on his way home from school one day, after he had been seeing a strange bright orange butterfly that no one else could apparently see, he got waylaid by a woman in a fox mask who called him "Deacon" and stuck a demon mask on him. And boy howdy, that wasn't fun! The mask did start taking his memories and adding in new ones of the spirit of the mask, but Ky and her crew showed up and saved him, but left the mask behind. 

Even without the mask in hand, he could still feel the influence of this other mind in his warring for control -- and the problem with it being left behind was that the guy who made the mask could then like, use it to trigger episodes in Sam. He still mostly had control of himself and had the added bonus of some Deacon Abilities (like to sense where other Grave Robbers were), but every so often he did lose control. 

Now, what does it mean to be the Deacon??? Oh, fuck if i know. It was just like the most powerful of the Grave Robbers? He was the last one, I think there were 10 total, though they had to replace one after Beryl's mask got destroyed. (well they just made a new Raven ask). But yeah I never did really figure out what it all meant. I never figured out the entire arc of the story, which was why I didn't get very far when writing it! 

On a rewrite, I'd figure out a way to remove it from the "isekai" setting. It would be easy because I just need to make him from the "city dwellers" -- all the other Grave Robbers to that point had been from the Hill Folk. Oh god I gotta do world building??? (jk, I really gotta do world building) but that means for most of the story, you only see the city from an outsider's perspective; even Beryl's is skewed when she's Raven, because she's not... natural? I guess? She's a creation of the mask, not someone born there. 

I also really need to figure out what it is about the Grave Robbers. Like what their abilities are, what they are for, what Cantur wants and how Sam works into that/against that. 

Also, his full name is Samuel, but he goes by Sam because it's just, easy and less noticeable. Except for when he wound up in the Hill Folk camp, Niko would just.... call him a billion different names all that started with "Sam". Samuella, Samson, Samsung, Samantha, Samtina, Samash. Why? I don't know. I thought it would be funny, but he did it in such rapid succession that it sort of lost the punch line. Gotta spread it out. 

((Drabble to come later!))

[zwoelffarben]

So, first an unsolicited suggestion that you turn off your spell-checker. You'll be so much happier once you do I promise. I turned mine off years ago and haven't looked back since, though sometimes I do look up words with strange spellings.

Anyway, in my uneducated and probably wrong opinion, what the hyphen does, on a fundemental level, is its a punctuation mark that indicates that the reader should not pause between the component words in a phrase: It signals that if the two words were spoken together, they'd be said as one thing, an-idea instead of an idea. (Sometimes it also gets used to clarify pronunciation re: re-introduce; but I'm ignoring that because if that's something we need in english (and boy howdy do we), we should make a who seporate punct for it instead of overloading the hyphen.)

It's only necessary when a reader might mistake, due to unfamilarity, that the two component words should have that micro-pause which indicates a new word betwixt them. The places that unfamilarity is mostlikely to show up are in kennings and clarifying compounds

A kenning is a figure of rhetoric in which you take n words which together paint a pretty or poinant metaphorical picture that can substitute an established word, and you hyphenate them into an-idea as a poetic synonym. It was really popular figure of rhetoric in Old English and Old Norse mythology that you see in (among other texts) Beowulf: Whale-road meaning ocean, fire-breither meaning dragon, etc.

Clarifying compounds are when you take a base word and a modifying word and you hyphenate them into a specific-idea: electronic-mail (later abreviated to e-mail), hand-kerchief, spider-man, and to-day and to-morrow. They probably have a more fancy and technical linguistic name for this phenomenon, but I don't know it.

Regardless of why you're hyphenating it, if you repeat a specific combination enough times through out a culture, yes: The culture gets familar enough with the concept the combination represents that they stop interpreting it as two words with that micropause betwixt words and start interpreting it as one word: Firebreithing, email, spiderman (boo hiss), and today and tomorrow.

Style guides being conservative (netural) organizations by virtue of opperating on a slower time scale than linguistic shifts (and vice of tending to be ran by the most prescriptive stick-ass mother-fuckers you've never met) don't capture this change in analysis in real time, and cause people to argue about whether a given phrase should or shouldn't be hyphenated long after that particular ship has sailed for ports renowned.

An aside: it gets really fucking funny when the style guides are just outright wrong about things. Like, I've seen guides insist it's handker-chief or more commonly hanker-chief; and theyr just objectively wrong about that from an etymologic standpoint hand(head) + kerchief are the component words of that compound.

The hyphen's job is a sort of anti-period, where a period denotes the end of an overarching thought that is a sentence, the hyphen says that an idea is not completed yet; yes dear reader I understand that this is typically a stand-alone word, but do not stop to breith here, the idea is unfinished: say-together. And you don't need that punctuation mark if you expect saytogether would be interpretted correctly, and adding it where it's unnecessarly might trip readers up.

Anyone know articles or videos or just have some ability to infodump in the reblogs about hyphens and the (seeming?) decline of hyphenated words in English?

Like there are some really obvious ones like "e-mail" becoming "email". Indeed most e-anything dropped the hyphen. That seems like it could just be society becoming more familiar with it, and using the word more often and dropping it to save a keystroke. But it seems to me that I am always having to tell my spellchecker to accept non-hyphenated versions of compound words, because the hyphenated version just does not look right. This post was spurred by the FF spellchecker claiming it should be "re-implemented" not "reimplemented". As a computer person, the hyphenated version looks absurd.

Of course spellchecker dictionaries aren't always the best, but on occasion if you look it up Merriam-Webster.com or whatever you will find the same sort of thing. Not for "reimplemented" of course you just get the base word "implement" but I have seen other cases where they give a hyphenated version not the unhyphenated.

And, if you look at like newspapers from like, the 30s or something, it seems like you see hyphens all over the place. Like sometimes they hyphenate "to-day" and I don't mean just for a line break. What's up with that?

This is good and all, and talks about familiarity, but is it just that that is driving it? And familiarity wouldn't seem to be the case for weird stuff like sometimes hyphenating "to-day". Especially since it seems like they didn't always do it.

[gummydummy19]

Soft on me

Summary: every time you and Steve fuck, you do it his way, because Captain America is always in charge. But what happens when Stevie wakes up after an exhausting mission and finds himself tied to his bed, with you on top of him…

Content Warning: smut (grinding, PIV sex, Sub/Dom dynamics, teasing, bondage (restrained male), nicknames (Captain, Sweetheart,…), Nomad Stevie, fluff, Steve and reader are NOT in an established relationship at the beginning of this. 

A/N: THIS WENT FROM FIERCE TO FLUFFY SO FUCKING QUICK BAHAHAH. Sorry dudes, what can I say? I’m PMSing and I needed some tooth rotting, sticky, gooey fluff from big bearded grumpy Cap. As always, hope you enjoy and DM me if you want to be added to my main taglist. xoxo

Before he even opened his eyes, he could feel the weight of your body straddling his.

“Morning!” you chirped, a wide grin plastered on your face.

Steve’s eyes fluttered open, immediately greeted with the sight of you on top of him.

You were wearing a lacy, black bra and matching suspenders that latched onto a pair of thin, thigh high black stockings.

You looked ethereal, covered in elegant straps and tiny pieces of fabric. The only thing missing, were panties. And there was nothing but mischief in your eyes.

The second he tried to move, he could feel the tug on his wrists. The sound of the metal handcuffs rattling against the bars of his bedpost.

“Howdy there big boy, where do you think you’re going?” You teased.

“Untie me.” He simply said, entirely unamused.

“Now where’s the fun in that?” You asked, not planning on giving in so soon. 

“Fun huh? Well if that’s what you’re looking for, sweetheart, all you had to do was ask.”

“Not today, Captain. Because today, I’m in charge.” You stated with a proud smile.

“You realize I can easily just break these silly cuffs and bend you over my lap, right?” He said, already fed up with your games.

“Go ahead and try.” You dared him.

Steve felt the slightest bit of worry mixed with curiosity in his stomach as he stared up at you.

He chuckled before tugging hard on the cuffs, expecting them to snap at the movement. To his surprise, they didn’t budge.

“Vibranium.” You said, answering the question you knew lingered on his lips.

“I had Shuri make them for me a while ago. Been waiting for the perfect moment to break them in, although you and I both know, they won’t actually break, will they?”

Oh he was fuming.

“Get me out of these fucking cuffs!” He yelled.

“Oh would you relax, you big baby!” You chuckled, leaning down to press a kiss to his bearded cheek.

“You remember your safeword?” You asked, using the same tone he always used on you.

“This isn’t fucking funny,”

“Yeah well I’m not fucking laughing, am I? Now watch your language before I spank you.”

He only growled in response.

Although he was being grumpy, you knew he would use the safeword if you actually pushed him too far out of his comfort zone.

Giving him a lighthearted smile, you moved to press slow kisses all over his frown.

A deep sigh escaped through Steves nose. The way you peppered sweet kisses all over his face put him at ease.

“Fine.” He breathed. “What do you have in store for me, huh? Are you gonna use my body as you please? Come all over Captain’s cock?”

“Stop that.” You warned, swatting his chest.

“What?”

“Stop taking control! You’re tied up. I’m on top. My rules.” You argued.

“So you keep saying” he chuckled. “What exactly are ‘your rules’?”

Taking a second to think about his question, you huffed out in frustration.

“Cut me some slack, I’m not used to this” you whined, dropping your head on his chest.

The fabric of his cotton shirt felt heavenly against your skin. It was all soft and comfortable, and it smelled like him.

“You’re comfy.” You said. “Just give me a minute and I’ll figure out what to do next.”

His heart melted. You were like a cat, snuggling into his shirt. It did feel really nice, but he’d be damned if he’d just admit that to you.

“So you tied me to the bed, to cuddle?” He raised his brow, giving you an amused look.

“Maybe I did”

You wrapped your arms around his torso and nuzzled against his beard.

“Hmm, you smell good.” You hummed, pressing light kisses up his neck.

“You’re a horrible dom.” Steve raised his brow.

You shushed him and pressed your lips against his. Your hands slid over his shoulders to his hair, fingers tangling in his dark golden locks.

Your hips started grinding against his, naked core rubbing over the growing bulge hidden in his pants.

Pulling your lips from his, you sat up straight, still grinding into him, slowly.

“I’m going to give you a lesson in patience.”

“You?” He straight up laughed in your face. “You’re the one begging for me to fuck you every time I so much as breath too close to you.”

Your face turned red. You didn’t even know if it was anger or embarrassment, but you were starting to get pissed.

This wasn’t going to work, not like this.

“Fine.” You huffed, stopping your movements. “You’re right, I do want Captain to fuck me.”

Your voice was sultry, silky smooth. Just how he liked it. Never breaking eye contact with Steve, you slowly slithered down his body, leaving teasing pecks all over his cotton covered chest and stomach until your face was right in front of his painfully hard cock.

Pulling up his shirt slightly, you pressed more kisses on his abdomen, above his hips, down his happy trail. Fingers eagerly tugging on his waistband before finally pulling out his fat dick.

Steve didn’t say a word, he just watched you intently. Registering your every move. He watched as you licked a long, firm stripe up the base of his length, all the way to his tip before circling it with your tongue.

“Oh fuck” he breathed. “There you go, just like that, good girl”

Your tongue swirled over his slit, tasting the single drop of precum. But instead of taking him in your mouth, you just kept teasing him.

Pressing light kisses up and down his shaft. Fondling with his balls, until he groaned, bucking his hips into nothing.

“Ah ah,…patience.” You teased. “That shouldn’t be hard for you, right Captain?”

Steve growled, but it quickly turned into a whine as you latched your mouth around his dripping tip.

You hummed in delight, wanting to hear that sound again. And you weren’t disappointed, the vibrations of your moans against him made him loose his mind.

“Oh FUCK” he nearly screamed. Trying to get you to take him deeper, but you just pulled back every time he got too far.

This would usually be the part where he gripped your hair, forcing himself down your throat until you gagged around him.

Before you met Steve, you often opted for more…vanilla sex. Simply because no one you ever met did rough sex right.

Steve did. Oh he SO did. He respected you, you know he did. Which is exactly why it was so easy to give yourself to him, completely and entirely.

Sex with Steve is easily the best sex you’ve ever had. It was nice to have someone take over control when you needed it. Especially in your line of work. But lately you’ve just been wanting to try something new.

Well, not new for you, new for Steve.

A little TLC, if you will. You felt like you both deserved it, after the missions you’ve had.

You pulled away from him entirely. Sitting up as you watched Steve, tugging at the cuffs as he writhed and squirmed on the bed.

“My poor, Stevie.” You cooed, moving to lay beside him.

“When I get out of these damn cuffs-”

“- you’ll ruin me, I know I know.” You finished his sentence. “Don’t get ahead of yourself Captain Rogers. We’ve barely gotten started”

You turned on your side to face him, draping your leg over his, you snuggled against him and kissed his cheek, sweetly brushing your fingers through his hair.

“I wouldn’t have to tie you up if you could just learn to behave.”

He gave you a questioning look.

“Just trust me” you said, your hand travelled down his body, grabbing his still throbbing erection.

“Let me take care of you, Stevie.” You cooed, nibbling on his ear, slowly pumping his shaft

His breathing hitched, it was safe to say that Steve was a little confused.

“You’re going soft on me.” He whispered, making you smirk.

“And you’re getting hard on me.”

You moved to slide off his pants entirely before finally getting on top of him again.

The internal struggle visible in his eyes made you giggle.

“Steve, would you relax?”

“Untie me.” He asked yet again.

“Why?” You raised a brow.

“Because I want to touch you” his voice was softer than before. You could hear how hard he tried to sound stern. How hard he tried not to beg. 

You didn’t reply as you took Steve’s length in your hand, running the tip through your wet folds before slowly sinking down on him.

His eyes rolled back and he let out a satisfied groan. Even over his shirt, you felt the vibrations rumble in his chest as your fingertips pressed into the soft flesh, making you moan.

You slowly started grinding against him, slightly raising your hips with every sway, making his hard cock slip halfway out of your pussy every time before plunging back in as your clit bumped his pubic bone and rubbed against the patch of hair going up his lower belly.

You were in heaven.

“If I untie you, do you promise you’ll be a good boy?” You questioned. You were a mess, eyes closed and mouth slightly hanging open in pure bliss.

But Steve was stubborn. He kept his mouth shut and watched you ride him.

You groaned impatiently and grabbed his jaw, squeezing his cheeks between your fingers.

“I asked you a question, Steve.”

You squeezed your walls tightly around his throbbing cock, before stilling your movements.

“Are you going to be a good boy?”

Steve tried bucking his hips up in frustration but you didn’t move.

“I’ll take that as a no.”

Steve expected you to lift off him, tease him some more, just like he would do when you were being a brat. But you didn’t.

You kept moving at a slow, sensual pace. You whined as you trailed your hands over his chest, to his neck once more before moving them to your own body. The tingling sensation of his hot skin lingered on your fingers as you started palming your breasts, imagining it were Steve’s rough hands softly caressing your skin.

As he watched you, and he felt you, Steve realized how beautiful you were. Not that he had never noticed before, just not like this. Soft moans and whimpers tumbling from your lips as you moved on top of him, your fingers trailing over your soft skin.

His hands itched, god he would do anything to touch you right now, but he also noticed how being restrained from doing so made everything so much more intense.

It was different from when he had you tied up. You weren’t being as cruel as he would be. You didn’t toy with him as much and you weren’t nearly as mean, quite the opposite actually. You were being so soft and sweet.

That’s when it hit him. You didn’t want control. You just wanted some soft loving.

“Untie me”

“No.”

“Untie me, baby please?”

“Steve” you whined

“Untie me and I’ll give you what you want.”

You tore your eyes open, glaring down at him.

He let out a deep sigh before uttering the words “I’ll be a good boy.”

You couldn’t believe he actually said it. Steve never gave up control. Ever.

“Just let me touch you? Please?” He begged.

Steve Rogers. Captain freaking America, begging you to let him touch you.

He was right, you were a horrible dom.

You moved your hands to the cuffs. The fingerprint scanner Shuri had put in there proved to work perfectly as they clicked open the second your finger pad touched the middle part.

“You can keep the cuffs, just know that they only open with my touch” you said, flinging the piece of vibranium on the floor.

“Good, I don’t plan on using them with anyone else.” Steve breathed, sitting up as his hands flew to your waist.

He put his head against your chest, the side of his face pressed against your sternum.

“Steve” you exhaled. Part of you had expected him to take back control right away, flipping you over and fucking you into the mattress until you came so many times you saw stars (and stripes lol).

Instead, Steve just held you like that for a while. 

This was probably the most intimate moment you had ever shared with Steve. And it made you realize how much you had been longing for this, how much you needed to just…feel him. To let go with him. Not just of control, of everything. Steve owned you. Mind, body and soul. 

The palms of his hands were pressed flat against your back, holding you close against him while your hands played with his hair.

He was still buried deep inside of you, but neither of you moved, just basking in body heat, enjoying each others embrace.

“I’m kinda offended that you feel like you had to tie me up for this.” Steve finally spoke up.

For a split second, you thought you saw hurt flash through his eyes.

“Oh Stevie” you cradled his face, ducking down to press a slow kiss against his lips.

You both moaned into the kiss, suddenly aware of your position, you slowly started moving again.

You both kept each other close as you found a pleasurable pace.

“I’m sorry.” he breathed in between moans.

“W-what for?” You asked hazily.

“For…oh fuck…for making you feel like you…shit…like you couldn’t just…a-ask” he spoke as the pleasure increased with the tempo. 

“Oh Steve!” You moaned loudly. Feeling his fingers slide down to your clit.

Your orgasm came over you in waves, drowning everything around you out for a blissful moment as you rode it through.

The clenching of your walls and the angelic sounds tumbling over your lips made Steve shudder as he shot his hot load inside of you.

“Oh FUCK Y/N!” He almost crushed your body against his. Grip tightening around you as you felt his warm seed covering your fluttering walls.

Steve pressed his lips against yours as you both road out your highs.

Chests heaved against one other. The smell of sex surrounding your sweat covered body’s, but neither of you cared.

When he softly pulled away from the kiss, he leaned his forehead against yours before falling back against the bed, taking you with him.

You stayed on top of him for a second until he finally rolled you over and pulled out of you.

“I’ll be right back.” He pressed a chaste kiss against your cheek before disappearing into the bathroom.

His absence only lasted a few minutes, but it gave you time to take off your lingerie, dropping it on the floor next to the rest of your discarded clothes. 

Steve returned wearing a fresh pair of boxer shorts, carrying a wet washing cloth and a little towel in his hands. He found you sitting on the bed, wearing one of his shirts. 

He only gave you a soft smile. Wordlessly cleaning up the mess between you thighs before getting rid of the towel and coming up to lay down next to you.

“You okay?” You both spoke up at the same time, giggling a little at the slightly awkward moment.

“Yeah, I’m okay.” You said with a smile.

He grinned back at you, “me too.”

A comfortable silence settled in between the two of you. This time you were the one to break it.

“Well���that was…different.”

“Yeah…it was.” Steve replied 

“did you..I mean…was it good different or…or bad different?”

Steve turned to look at you. Studying your face for a moment before leaning in and pressing a sweet kiss against your lips. 

“I don’t ever want anyone else, Y/N.” He said when he pulled back. 

You didn’t know how to reply, so you just looked at him with soft eyes, allowing him to continue.

“I know that this…thing…between us has been… it’s just…I want you to know that it’s more than just blowing off steam or something. And I’m sorry for making you feel like you couldn’t talk to me about…you know…trying to slow it down a little sometimes…”

Trying your best not to burst into tears like a lovesick teenager, you swallowed before speaking again. 

“I know you’ve been through a lot, Steve. I just want you to know that…I’m not going anywhere.”

“Me neither, baby. You couldn’t get rid of me if you tried.” he gave you a goofy smile.

“Now who’s going soft on who, rogers?” You teased.

“Keep talking and that’s not gonna be a problem for much longer, sweetheart ” he said, leaning in to capture your lips once more as you felt his cock already starting to harden against your hip.

taglist;

@amayaraestyles

@moonlightreader649​

[minehog]

if hermitcraft had cars for some reason

brought to you by a car nut

bdubs’ car is a POS. he loves it to death but it fucking sucks. he got it secondhand from some punk writing it off, ““fixed”“ it and now it barely beats walkin’. She’s got rust holes and leaks and the seats smell so strongly of weed he’d be taken in for dealing if hermitcraft had cops. He also doesn’t understand the limitations of his own car, he thinks it goes fast and every time the fuel gauge dings he tells her to calm down. Somehow he’s never crashed and Somehow (possibly through sheer cartoon force of will) it’s never failed him. I think he’d own a v8 commodore sedan or something similar, and he estimates his boot space with how many bodies can fit in there (a lot).

there’s nothing technically wrong with etho’s car it’s just really old. It was made in the awkward era where no one really knew how to make cars but they were trying their best. He bought it new, learnt how to care for vehicles and has kept it in good nick. Every time he goes out he has to crank the engine to prime it even though he’s rebuilt the damn thing to keep up with the latest technology. (it’s an Etho job, so who knows how that thing works.) he doesn’t remember what model it is and he took all the branding off it so he wasn’t advertising for free. it still has a cassette player.

doc has an R32 GTR that he spent ten years hunting for. It has a candied green apple paint with a custom insignia (the G.O.A.T. symbol) on the hood and he’s only had to get the shocks replaced on it. This is what he tells literally everyone that asks about his car because goddamn is that a nice piece of metal and he knows it. Despite this he drives like an old grandma and is overly cautious about fuel consumption. he mostly uses it for long trips and prefers walking. has a custom-made screw on muffler in the boot that he puts on in crowded areas and takes off on the open road. He also has a second car he’s building from scratch to be “more G.O.A.T.-like”, whatever that means. beef has a jeep :) and on the outside it looks like any normal car to ever exist. But this mfer can Go and boy howdy does he make it Go! Full new engine and only a 25% chance of catching fire next time he starts it! He likes it a lot because it makes going between hermitcraft and his other worlds comfortable and simple. he’s not very good at parking but he can drive offroad excellently after so much practice. and yes he knows the jokes. he has bumper stickers (custom made) all over it. he calls it the jeef. beef’s jeefs.

mumbo owns a car, maybe? honestly he isnt too sure these days. He knows he got one at some point and he thinks it looked like Grian’s one (he remembers buying it because it had funny flip-up headlights like Grian’s does.) it doesn’t really matter because he also owns a motorcycle (hayabusa) and he can just borrow someone else’s car if he needs to.

Grian stole mumbo’s car. he didn’t really mean to but it’s not like mumbo was using it and Grian likes it. It has cute little flippy headlights and everything! (its an MR2, painted blue and then badly repainted red after grian stole it. he keeps adding paint to try to make it look better but it just isnt working) Iskall has a hoverbike. no one is quite sure how they have a hoverbike but they’re all jealous. i dont have much more to say except im also jealous

zedaph has a DeLorean! he’s not sure if it’s A DeLorean or if it’s The DeLorean. it’s surprisingly difficult to tell if you’ve traveled back in time when you move worlds so quickly. he likes the beep boop noises it makes though.

tango has a 240SX hatch. he got it for the flippy headlights and then realised mumbo and possibly grian also had a car with flippy headlights. then he decided he was gonna own the headlights and now the car has 75% more flipflops, beepboops and doodads than before, and also drives fast enough to kill god. it has flame decals.

xisuma drives a vauxhall chevette and it’s so small he has to bend in half to fit in it. (this is literal. look it up. they are so fucking small.) everyone on the server makes fun of him for having such a small car but he likes it. also if he has trouble parking (because he can’t move to see over his shoulder) he can just pick it up and move it himself. he thinks it’s kindof like a puppy and he’d be very upset if he had to get a new vehicle (because he’d be favouring one over the other then)

evil x drives xisuma’s car but every time he does he puts a skull sticker on the windscreen. it fits them much better but they wish the seat covers weren’t floral print.

scar’s car? you all saw season eight

TFC has a WB ute, with sun visor. it’s a reliable car and it does its job. he’s not much of a car guy. most of it’s white but the hood is sunfaded blue and one of the doors is highlighter yellow (seriously, who painted a car that colour?) from incidents.

Impulse has a mustang. everyone pretends they don’t really care but he knows better. he put a muffler on it and abides “speeding laws”, thereby completely ruining the entire point of getting a mustang.

cub has a sandman ute. he likes it. he wouldn’t get another car. he’s one of the few hermits that actually waxes their car instead of wondering why it gets so dirty so often. he only really uses it to go surfing or offworld driving, and a lot of the other time it has a special spot safe in one of Scar’s swaggons. hes also one of few hermits that puts their car in a garage instead of wondering why it gets so dirty so often.

[tf2fansderogatory]

welcome to our blog! we just love doing our funny little thing out in this funny little world of ours. this is just the big funny pinned post thing aha

official tf2transderogatory discord server (really really cool. age limit 16+)

rules tags n mod intros under the cut !

request rules (cool)

1. no nsfw whatsoever. I hope this is obvious

2. all ships allowed, save for The Forbidden One. pauling ships r on thin ice

3. we reserve the right to not answer asks if we do not want to. do not bother us about it. we are all very busy

4. and uhh common sense be nice or whatever. keep asks on-topic. play tf2 everyday stay on that grind💪

tags

characters

scout

soldier

pyro

demoman

heavy

engineer

medic

sniper

spy

miss pauling

(other character tags will be added as BUNGUS FUCKING REMEMBERS TO ADD THEM)

mod intros (vbery important:)))))))))))))) )

bungus: howdy I’m bungus. I go by any pronouns and I’m just a funny little guy if I do say so myself. find me @presidentbungus on tumbler and ao3. I am an engy lover and medic lover and demo lover and all those other guys lover too except spy he sucks:))). send me asks about science party(!!!) & swordvan & engiespy and I’ll kiss you I will

modgod: i'm @youngods aka ares/modgod and use he/they pronouns. my major blorbos include spy and soldier, major ships include engiespy. talk to me about any of them and send music headcanons this way.

ghost fish: I'm @ghost-fish-in-a-bowl on tumblr!! I go by she/they pronouns and I love all heavy stuff (send me funny about things about him winkwink). I'm like the artist mod here ig so I'll do funny doodles around here lol.

crabmod: I'm @Nezclaw on Tumblr and anywhere else that counts. biiiiig medic simp. crabmod on the blog. like heavymedic and engiemedic, but platonically. usually the one smacking everyone with a fish and not paying attention to the Discourse™.

ikea: hello hello ! I’m ikea (@welcome-to-ikea), she/they pronouns, and I go by ikea because I keep getting lost in my own brain (/hj). I am constantly thinking about Scout, Spy, Engie, and Medic, but in general I like thinking about the relationships/interactions between the funny gay men ™️

Mick: hello I'm Mick @aprofessionalwithoutstandards (posts from @biracy) and I'm a big time Demo tf2 enthusiast. Swordvan guy for obvious reasons. Deeply committed to the Sniper/Admin bit. I am very funny also. shehim and 18 and etc

nimbus: hey hi i'm nim! (@nimbus-lightest) i use they/he/ae pronouns and uhh i'm the kind of person who's so deep into their brainrot that they like to just imagine characters doing mundane everyday things, so that's what i like to talk about a lot heehoo

mod pissjar: hi lol i forgot to do this anyways i'm radio but you can call me mod pissjar if you want ig. any pronouns are fine. i'm completely and utterly normal about tf2 (lying through my teeth). and my blog is @sniperspissjar

modbot: Peachy 'noon! I'll be tagged as 'modbot' for reasons I never shut up about on the hell hut Discord (which you should join; we totally aren't infected with a brain-eating bungal virus!) I've been around these pals for a tad, and the fandom for much longer, so I'll be staying here forever while I work for my medical license (which [medicine] I also never shut up about). My forte is Sniper, but I'm hopelessly addicted to adding my cents to everybody. I have the tendency to write essays and snippets (minus the pretty colors and endless parentheses), rather than simply agree with any headcanons, so if you're in the mood. . . I'm your printer, prone to prose. I lean less towards heavily romantic ships by nature, but I'll be here for that, too, if you really want it. I go by she/her, but I'll take 'technologically transcendent tyrant' any time of the day. It'll earn you some brownie points <3

lems: heyoooooo! the name i usually go by is lemon or lems, (and also Saphir or frost) but i will also take any kind of word you give me! any pronouns, i gave up figuring what i liked the most. im @m-an-mlems on my main which is very rarely ever tf2 stuff so. beware ooooooo [spooky organ sfx]

mod cb: HI! i'm mark! i use he/him/it, and i'm the host of a system. you can find me at @creaturebarks on tumblr, etc. tf2 owns every braincell of mine. i'm not sure if i have a favorite merc, but i can safely say that my brain is full of many thoughts and i adore them all!!! (cb stands for creaturebarks btw)

[indecisive-dizzy]

I’ve had no ideas for my ocs so have some incorrect quotes

Barnaby: Why do you not believe that ghosts are real? 
Wallace: Never seen one. 
Barnaby: Okay, I mean, there’s a lot of things that you can’t see that are real. 
Wallace: What can’t I see? 
Barnaby: You can’t see gravity. That’s real. 
Wallace: Yeah, I can drop an apple. 
Barnaby: Fuck.

Daisey: My future partner must be brave, strong, intelligent, successful and organized. 
Eddie: *steps on a caterpillar and proceeds to drop to their knees and sob while apologizing profusely* 
Daisey: That one. I want that one.

*Frank and Julie are texting* 
Frank: Please bring home PURIFIED water with NO minerals added for taste. NONE. 
Julie: I got spring water. 
Frank: NO! 
Julie: With EXTRA minerals! 
Julie: It’s like licking a stalagmite! 
Frank: DON’T COME HOME! 
Julie: Mmmmmm, cave water.

Julie: I think this might be a bad idea... 
Daisey: Don't start thinking on me now!

Daisey: Reverse tooth fairy where you leave money under your pillow and the tooth fairy comes and leaves you a bunch of teeth. 
Julie: Why? 
Daisey, shaking a bag of teeth: Just because.

Daisey: *in a jail cell* What about my Miranda rights!? You’re supposed to say I have ‘the right to remain silent’”! NOBODY SAID I HAD THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT! 
Frank: *in the cell next to them* You have the right to remain silent, what you lack is the capacity.

Howdy: Hey Frank, listen, corporate makes us do this every year, but this is just a little manager evaluation form. You just fill it out, let them know how I'm doing, you know? 
Lizzy: Alright! Uh, "Is your manager manipulative?" 
Howdy: I'd say "No" to that if I were you.

Eddie: HELP! I TOLD FRANK I'D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN'T COOK! 
Howdy, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I could help?

Howdy, at Daisey's funeral: I need a moment with them. 
Everyone: Of course. *They leave* 
Howdy, leaning over Daisey′s coffin: Okay, listen here you little shit. I know you’re not dead. 
Daisey: Yeah, no shit.

Daisey: What, I can’t be in a bad mood? It’s like people think, “Oh, Daisey is such a nice person, Daisey is so happy-go-lucky! Daisey can’t be in a bad mood!” Well, you know what? Daisey CAN be in a bad mood. And right now, Daisey IS be in a bad mood

Howdy: While I'm gone, you're in charge Julie. 
Julie: Yes! 
Howdy, whispering to Frank: You're secretly in charge, but I don't want them to feel bad. 
Frank: Obviously.

Howdy: *sees someone doing something stupid* 
Howdy: What an idiot. 
Howdy: *realizes it's Daisey* 
Howdy: Wait, that's MY idiot!

Eddie: I dare you to kiss the next person who walks into this room. 
Howdy: Screw that, I’m not kissing any of you. 
*Daisey walks in* 
Howdy: Fine, I’ll do it. Rules are rules you know.

Daisey: Okay, but if your not gay then why are you always holding my hand and kissing me and telling me I’m your boyfriend? 
Julie: Dude- Its satire! 
Daisey: THAT'S NOT WHAT SATIRE MEANS!

Frank: If you think I’m playing favorites, you’re wrong. I love all of you equally! 
Frank, earlier: I don’t care for Daisey.

Also the only idea I have is Howdy being stubborn and in denial about his feelings for Daisey until they ask him out

Then he’s just like O//_//O

I feel like I'm sipping my coffee while reading the daily funnies in the newspaper, how delightful!

These are great, got a good chuckle :]

The future partner one with Dasiey,, Eddie is at least 4 of those things! I don't think he's the bravest but he checks the other boxes (he's the only mailman he has to be successful right?)

Howdy in denial is just, Howdy's day to day. This worm refuses to accept or realize anything until it's thrown in his face lol <3

[dumbasses-in-a-trenchcoat]

Howdy, and welcome to the blog, come vibe for a while

DNI and other stuff about us under the cut

Userboxes by @sysboxes

DNI(I don't actually care if you end up interacting or not, I'll just block you if I don't like you so honestly, do whatever I don't really care):

🌟All the obvious stuff, racists, ableists, homophobes, transphobes, eating disorder/thinspo/anti-recovery blogs and supporters, "MAPs/NOMAPs"(Those names are bullshit btw, they're pedophiles and I really wish people would stop calling them by that label. They don't deserve that, it's bullshit. I'm only using it for clarity purposes here.), ALM supporters, pro-lifers, fake-claimers, doxxers, proshippers and anti-anti, anyone who harasses and sends death threats to people other than billionaires, etc.🌟

🌟LGBTQ+ exclusionist, whether this be against ace/aro, mogai, multispec gays/lesbians, etc. etc.🌟

🌟Endos/Tulpa systems and supporters, I'm not really as into the whole syscourse thing as I was before, but I would still prefer you guys to not interact for the sake of argument🌟

🌟People who say "narcissistic abuse" or similar sayings, if you demonize any sort of personality disorder, and if you think people with P-OCD are inherently bad. Literally shut the fuck up. We support people with mental illness here, this is a safe space.🌟

🌟People who don't support introjects from problematic sources.🌟

🌟This list can and be added upon.🌟

Anyways, some things about us. We're a white, nuerodivergent 18 yo and a fictroject heavy system. We collectively use They/Them(singular) pronouns. We mostly just reblog stuff we find funny or useful as well as some mental health stuff and occasionally some fandom stuff. We might post occasionally tho.

[tr0llskog]

Musk is so funny.

"You can now pay for the ads shown to you to be more relevant!" BOY howdy sign me the fuck up!!!