#and how could she be sure that he wanted the comfortable while she wanted the pain and he stayed the same but all of her changed like m.rain | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

bsturnzmtts · 2 days ago

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Beyond innocence - Matt Sturniolo

Re uploaded because my account bsturnzmtt got deactivated :( Please follow and let me know if you want to be in my tag list !

Paring: dom! Matt x innocent' ! Reader

Contains/warnings: rough sex, fingering, oral (male receiving), creampie (on the pill), p in v, petnames, angsty, reader pretends to be innocent, long plot.

Summary: You were childhood best friends with the Sturniolo triplets. After moving to another state your freshman year, you stayed in touch with Nick and Chris, while Matt never really tried. Years later, Nick and Chris planned a trip to visit you and brought Matt along. They stayed at your house for a month, which gave Matt enough time to realize your innocence facade after seeing the real you.

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You are childhood best friends with the triplets. Sadly you had to move to another state when you were in freshman year. But you kept contact with Nick and Chris, Matt never really tried. Years passed and Nick and Chris planned a trip to go visit you. And made Matt come along. The trip is based on staying at your house where you and your mother live for a month and doing many fun activities. Unfortunately Nick and Chris also have an event to attend while they are there, so that obviously takes time that you could use to hang out, and means you're forced to spend more time with Matt.

You were really nervous to get to see the triplets again after many years. Especially Matt, you never really told anyone but back then you had a little crush on him. So it crushed your heart when he did even try to keep contact with you. But you're over that now, you’ve grown… right?

Matt remembers you. You always acted so innocent, oblivious and naive. But he knew deep down you were none of those things, especially after many years have passed and you two have grown

……

Your mother adores the triplets and often talks about the happy times you all had together. She sees them as part of the family and hopes their visit will bring back those happy days. Your mother believes you’re still the same innocent, well-behaved girl from back then, not realizing you’ve changed. Matt, however, always saw right through your act. Even as kids, he knew you weren’t as naive and innocent as you pretended to be for your mother’s sake.

You wake up to a notification buzzing from your phone. A message from Nick lit up on your screen: “We’re on our way. See you in a few hours!”

“Great! Can't waaaaait, see you in a few!!” You text back.

You felt excited and anxious at the same time. It had been years since you moved away, leaving behind the triplets and your shared childhood. While you had kept in touch with Nick and Chris, Matt had always been distant, never bothering to stay connected.

You glanced around your room, making sure everything was in order. You and your mother had prepared for their arrival, ensuring there was space for everyone. Your mom had even prepared their favorite meal.

After checking that everything’s in place you went to get changed. You take off your pjs and put on freshly clean clothes, brushed your teeth and hair, and added some perfume.

As you stared at your reflection in the mirror, you wondered how much you’d changed. Would they still recognize you?

Hours later, the doorbell rang, sending a jolt of anticipation through you. You opened the door to find Nick and Chris grinning widely, their familiar faces instantly comforting. You hugged them tightly, the years melting away in an instant.

“Oh my god guys I’ve missed you so much” you say hugging Nick and Chris.

As you pull away from Nick and Chris, you feel a sudden void in the air. You turn around, your heart pounding with anticipation, only to find Matt leaning against the door frame, his piercing gaze locked onto you. “Matt… Heyy it’s been a long time.” You say as you hug him awkwardly, giving him pats on his back. "Yeah, it has been a long time, hasn't it?" Matt says as he hugs you back, his voice smooth and unaffected as he takes in your appearance, a smirk playing on his lips. "But hey, I'm sure we'll catch up soon enough."

Your mother rushed in, thrilled to see the triplets. She hugged them tightly. “I’ve missed you boys! Come in! I made your favorite meal.”

You guys filled the house with laughter and stories, just like old times.

Now it’s time for them to choose a room. Your house has two guest rooms, one which is downstairs with a big bed, and another that is upstairs next to your room with a small bed. So two of the triplets will share the room downstairs and one will use the room upstairs.

“Soo who will sleep where?” You ask.

“I say we flip a coin, the winner gets to have their own room.” Matt says.

“Yeah, sounds fair.” Nick and Chris agreed.

“I’ll take tails.” Chris says.

“Me too.” Nick says.

Matt pulled out a coin from his pocket. “I’ll take heads,” he said. He flipped the coin and it landed in his hand. “Oh, looks like I got it.” Matt smirked.

“Mh great, so Matt takes the upstairs room and you guys share the downstairs room.” You say.

Matt smirks, knowing he got the better end of the deal. He turns to his brothers "You guys can split the downstairs room, don't make a mess of it." He heads up the stairs, leaving Nick and Chris to figure out the sleeping arrangements.

“K! So I’ll help you guys with your luggage.” You say to Nick and Chris as Matt heads upstairs.

"Thanks for the help," Nick says, grabbing his duffel bag. Chris nods in agreement, shouldering his own bag. They head towards their room, chatting excitedly about old times and plans for the weekend. After they finish unpacking you bring them towels and other essentials.

“Here you go guys, if you need anything ask me.” You say to them with a smile.

Then you walked upstairs and knocked on Matt’s door.

"Come in." Matt called out, his voice deep and smooth. You opened the door to find him sprawled out on the bed, shirtless with his long legs crossed and ankles resting on the pillows.

“Oh, hey… here you have towels and other things you might need.” You say.

Matt raises an eyebrow, taking in your sight, before sitting up to accept the towels, trying not to let his eyes wander too much. "Thanks, I appreciate it.”

“No problem.” You say with a smile.

He sets the towels aside and pats the bed beside him in an unspoken invitation. "So, how's life been treating you?" His question is casual, but there's a hint of genuine curiosity in his gaze as he studies your face.

“Good y’know, normal” you respond.

He nods, a small smile playing at the corners of his lips as he leans back on the pillows, one hand absently running through his hair. "Normal, huh? That's good to hear.“

You stand there awkwardly. “Yeah… What about you?” You ask.

He shrugs, letting his hand fall to the bed. "It's been... interesting. Work keeps me busy, but I can't complain. It's fulfilling." He says.

“Yeah, it must be fun being a youtuber. Anyways… good catching up, I’m gonna go see if Nick and Chris need some help.” You say.

"Sure, I'll let you get back to your friends. But first" He says as he stands up and grabs your wrist. “What?” You ask with curiosity. "First, I want to show you something." He pulls you closer, his eyes locking onto yours with an intensity that makes your breath hitch. "Close the door behind you, will you?" “Matt, what is this about?” You ask with curiosity. "You'll see, now close the door." he said with a mischievous look in his eyes. “… fine.” You roll your eyes and close the door.

He chuckles at your eye roll and keeps his eyes on you. After the door is closed he turns around and walks over to his dresser. He opens it and pulls out a familiar bag to you. “Mmh I think I found something very interesting about you.” He says with a smirk walking closer to you holding a very fancy bag containing the lingerie you recently bought.

Your eyes widen as you see the bag on his hands. “What!? You went through my room!?” You ask, feeling a little frustrated.

He chuckles at your reaction. “Hey! I got confused, okay? Your room is right next to mine, I just accidentally opened the wrong door, and thought ‘why don’t I take a look?’ So yea, I was snooping around, sue me… but look what I found. And let me tell you, I'm rather impressed," he says, his tone dripping with amusement and a hint of something more.

“Ugh! Give it to me!” You say and try to snatch the bag out of his hands.

"Ah ah ah, not so fast, sweetheart," he says with a playful chuckle, holding the bag just out of your reach. He takes a step back, his eyes roving over your form with a smug expression.

“What would your dear mother think about her little perfectly behaved, innocent and naive daughter buying this kind of stuff?” He says with a smirk.

You roll your eyes in frustration. “Matt-“ but when you’re about to say something your mother walks in.

“Hey! I just wanted to check if everything was good. Did you get everything you need Matt?” Your mother asks sweetly.

“Yes! I already gave him the towels and everything!” You answer quickly, then turn to look at Matt. “If you need anything else you can ask me.” You say to Matt feigning a sweet innocent tone.

Matt smirks at your sweet tone, but says nothing for the moment, keeping the bag of lingerie tightly in his grasp. He glances at your mother, who seems oblivious to the awkward situation, and back to you, his eyes gleaming with mischief.

“Great! I’m off to work sweetie, could you finish the dishes please?” Your mom says.

“Of course mom. Good luck at work.” You answer with a smile.

Your mom gives you a peck on the cheek, humming a happy tune as she heads out the door. The moment she's gone, Matt closes it behind her with a soft click. He turns back to you, a playful glint in his eye. "Now, where were we?“

“Give me the bag, Matt.” You say in a serious tone.

He chuckles, the sound low and husky as he holds the bag out of your reach, teasing you with the temptation. "Ah, come on. Don't be like that. It's just a little fun, isn't it?”

“It’s not even mine. I’m hiding it for a friend. I would never use that kind of stuff.” You say.

The teasing glint in his eyes falters slightly, replaced by a flash of surprise. Then, he laughs again, a genuine amusement coloring his gaze as he hands you the bag. "Sure you wouldn't…Sure you wouldn't.”

“I swear! That’s probably expensive, so I wouldn’t be able to afford it.” You answer defensively.

Matt chuckles. “Fine, fine you can have the bag.” He hands you the bag, but still not believing you.

You roll your eyes and grab the bag. “Thank you.”

"No problem, sweetheart." He winks at you, then leans against the dresser, his arms crossed over his chest. His eyes never leave yours, a playful smirk still on his face. "So, which friend is it for, hmm?”

“Ugh none of your business.” You say and leave the room and go to your room.

Matt smirks after you leave, shaking his head slowly. He chuckles to himself, making a mental note to double check that story later.

As soon as you get to your room you close the door and let out sigh, feeling happy Matt ‘bought’ your lie. You quickly hide the bag again, but this time in another place. After that you decided to go downstairs and see what Chris and Nick are up to.

You walk downstairs, the sound of your footsteps echoing in the quiet house. As you reach the living room, you see Chris and Nick lounging on the couch. “Hey guys! whatcha doin?”

“Oh hey, we were just finishing getting ready for our event, it starts today” Nick answers.

“Todayyy? But you just got here.” You say.

The boys nod, confirming what they just said. Chris stretches on the couch lazily, grinning as he does so. "Yeah, we're excited to finally get started.”

“That’s good.” You say, then you har steps coming down the stairs.

Matt strolls down the stairs, a mischievous glint in his eye, he approaches the group, a sly smile playing on his lips. “Hey, don’t worry, you can hang out with me while they’re gone.” He says looking at you.

You faked a smile and answered. “Rightttt.”

He chuckles at your forced enthusiasm, knowing full well you're not entirely thrilled about the idea. He moves to sit on the armchair across from the couch, his posture relaxed but his gaze sharp as he watches you. “Our car is here Nick.” Chris says. “Okay okay I’m ready! Bye guysss see you later.” Nick says.

“Byeee I’ll miss you.” You say as they walk out the door.

"I'm sure you will" he said, watching as Chris and Nick leave the house. Once they're gone, Matt turns his attention back to you. "Well, I guess it's just you and me now." He says with a smirk.

You let out a sigh and roll your eyes. “Great.”

He chuckles under his breath, finding amusement in your annoyance. "Ah come on, don't be like that" he says as he leans back in the armchair. His eyes never leave yours, his gaze intent as he studies you from afar.

“I need to finish doing the dishes.” You say and walk to the kitchen.

"Oh, alright then" He says with a playful tone in his voice. As you move to the kitchen, he follows you, making himself comfortable on the counter top.

You start doing the dishes.

He watches you intently as you start washing the dishes, his presence making the ordinary task feel charged with unspoken tension. "So, I've been thinking..." he says casually, his voice low and smooth like velvet.

“What?” You sigh.

He leans in a bit closer, his elbows resting on his knees as he looks at you with an unnerving intensity in his eyes. "About our little chat earlier," he begins, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. "I think you might be hiding something from me, sweetheart.”

“That lingerie is not mine. I already told you.” You say.

He laughs softly, his eyes glinting mischievously. "Oh come on, you can drop the act with me. I know it's yours." He says, folding his arms across his chest as he watches you. “Who are you planning to wear all that stuff for?” He asks.

“Not you.” You snapped.

"Ah, so feisty today," he muses, a smirk playing on his lips. "I like it." He leans back against the counter, his posture relaxed but his eyes never leaving yours. "Well then, whose is it?" He asks, his voice light and teasing. He knows you're not actually angry with him, just a bit flustered.

“None of your business.” You answer and finish doing the dishes.

He chuckles softly at your response, clearly enjoying the little back-and-forth between the both of you. Once you're done with the dishes, he slides off the counter top and moves to stand in front of you, his gaze steady and unwavering. “I guess I’ll have to find out for myself then.”

“Yeah whatever.” You say and start walking away.

He catches your wrist, pulling you back around to face him. His grip is firm but not painful, his touch sending a jolt of electricity through your skin. "Whatever, huh?" He says, a hint of a challenge in his voice.

“What do you want, Matt?” You ask.

He raises an eyebrow at your reaction, but there's a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "Well, I want to know who the lingerie belongs to, for starters," he says, his tone teasing and playful.

“Fine. It’s mine.” You confess.

He smirks at your admission, his eyes sparkling with amusement. "I knew it," he says, his tone triumphant. He releases your wrist and steps back, his hands raised in a see, I told you so' gesture. "I must say, I'm impressed.”

You roll your eyes at him.

He laughs at your reaction, the sound deep and rich. He enjoys teasing you, knowing he can get a rise out of you so easily. "Hey, I'm just saying, it takes a confident woman to wear lingerie like that,”

“Happy now?” You ask with sarcasm. “It’s mine, are you done?”

He grins at your sarcasm, clearly enjoying the banter between the both of you. "For now," he replies, his tone light and unbothered.

You pull away from his grip and go to your room.

He lets you go, his eyes following you as you walk away. His grin doesn't fade as he watches you leave, still amused by your reaction. He leans against the door frame, arms crossed over his chest, as he watches you disappear into your room.

You stay in your room for a couple of hours until you get bored and decide to text Chris and Nick.

“Hey guysss at what time are you coming back? It’s getting lateee.” You text.

“This thing got delayed, so we’ll probably be here more time than expected :(“ Chris responds.

“Yeah, we’ll get home late. But don’t worry we have tomorrow to hangout.” Nick adds.

“Okayyy it’s fineee, luv u bye!” You text.

You lay in your bed bored, not knowing what to do.

But in the other hand, Matt did have a plan. He wants to annoy you, to tease you. So immediately after he got out of the shower he went into your room only wearing a towel hanging lowly on his hips. With an excuse to ask you a question.

Without knocking he just walked into your room. “Hey do you have-“

Your eyes immediately went to his body watching the water droplets dripping from his hair to his chest, his arms, how the towel is barely hanging over his hips. But you quickly wake yourself up giving him an ‘annoyed’ look. “Do you not know what knocking is?”

He grins widely at your reaction, his eyes glinting mischievously. He has exactly the reaction he wanted from you. "Thanks for reminding me, I forgot all about that." He says as his fingers lightly graze the door frame. “Anyway, I came to ask you, if you have a bathrobe I could borrow?”

“Ugh, no I don’t ha- wait… I already gave you one with the rest of the towels.” You say.

He chuckles at your exasperation, clearly amused by your flustered state. “What? You did?” He asks, while his eyebrows furrow in mock confusion, but his grin doesn't fade away. “Mh, I guess I forgot to check. My bad.”

“Yeah whatever, just leave.” You say and roll your eyes.

He chuckles again and exits the room, still with that infuriating grin on his face.

“And knock on the door next time!” You shout so he can hear you through the door.

He laughs as he closes your door behind him, the sound echoing in the hallway. "I'll try, but no promises," he calls back, his voice teasing and light. He can't help but feel a thrill at having gotten such a strong reaction from you.

As soon as he leaves you let out a sigh feeling frustrated, at him but especially at yourself, because of how wet you got by seeing him like that.

‘Mh if he’s going to play that game, I can play it too.’ You think to yourself.

After a while Nick and Chris finally get home. You guys ordered pizza and hung out for a little bit, after that you all went to bed.

Matt settles into bed, his thoughts lingering on the evening's events. He can't help but replay the moments in his head, the way your eyes widened when he entered your room, the flush on your cheeks, the annoyance in your voice. It was exhilarating, knowing he could get such a reaction from you. And he wanted more.

The next day you took Nick, Chris and Matt to all your favorite places and restaurants. You guys had a lot of fun, until the afternoon hit. It’s currently 5 pm and Nick and Chris have to leave again.

“Ughh againnnn?” You ask in a whiny voice.

“Yessss we’re so sorryyyy, this event lasts about a week and we have to go every day.” Nick says.

“But after the weekend we’ll have a lot of time to spend together.” Chris says.

They finish getting ready and leave.

Matt watches as Nick and Chris say their goodbyes and leave. He catches your eye, a slight smirk on his lips as he sees your whiny expression. "Well, looks like it's just you and me now," he says, his voice low and playful.

“Did my mom leave for work already?” You ask.

“Yeah like an hour ago. So no need to keep up with your innocent act.” He says.

You give him a glare and stand up to head to your room. But as you stand up, you ‘accidentally’ drop your phone. So you bend over in front of him, your back facing him.

He watches as you bend over to pick up your phone, taking in the sight of your curves and the way your shorts rise slightly. He bites back a groan as he adjusts himself, trying to hide his growing boner.

After you pick your phone up you stand up and leave like nothing happened.

He watches you leave, his eyes glued to your retreating figure. "Such a tease," he mutters under his breath, shaking his head with a small smile.

He is not gonna let you win this little game you two are playing. So for that he decided that he needs a change of clothes. He went to his room and changed his jeans for a pair of grey sweatpants, and obviously he didn’t forget to take out his boxers too. This change of undergarment leaves in view his erection that you left him with. With that said he goes back to the living room and puts on a movie, making sure the volume is loud enough to be heard in your room.

You start hearing a movie playing on the tv coming from the living room. ‘Ugh i'm going to kill him.’ You say in your mind. As you’re about to leave your room you decided to get more ‘comfortable’. So you take your bra off, now only wearing your white tee covering (barely) your upper body. You storm downstairs to the living room with an annoyed expression. “What’s your problem!? The whole neighborhood can probably hear the tv!” You say trying to avoid looking at his clear boner.

As you storm into the living room, Matt watches you with a smirk, his eyes flicking down to your almost exposed chest before meeting your gaze again. "Oh, was I being too loud for you, princess?" he taunts, making no effort to hide his obvious arousal.

You glare at him. “Yes! So turn down the volume.”

He smirks at your insistence, clearly enjoying the power dynamic between you two. Rising from the couch, he walks over to the TV and lowers the volume, his movements purposefully slow so you can't help but notice the bulge in his sweatpants with each step. As he does, his gaze lingers on your chest, the movement causing your braless breasts to jiggle slightly beneath the fabric of your shirt. "There, is that better?”

“Sure I guess.” You say and go to the kitchen.

Matt watches you head to the kitchen, his eyes never leaving your back as you walk away. He can't help but imagine the swell of your bare breasts, the way they'd feel in his hands, and it makes his cock throb with desire. He takes a deep breath, trying to calm his racing pulse. He waits a few moments before following you into the kitchen, his movements a bit more deliberate now. As he enters, he leans against the counter, folding his arms across his chest in a nonchalant pose that belies the hardness still prominent in his sweatpants.

You ignore him grabbing a glass and pouring yourself some water.

He watches as you take a long drink of water, imagining how refreshed your lips would look after being wrapped around his cock. "You're awfully quiet now," he observes, his tone light but with an undercurrent of suggestion. His eyes rove over your form, lingering on the way your t-shirt clings to your curves, the soft swell of your breasts.

“I have nothing to say to you.” You say setting down the glass on the counter.

He smirks, unfazed by your cold tone. "Is that so? Because I seem to recall you had plenty to say earlier." His eyes drop to your chest again, the thin fabric of your shirt doing little to hide the delicate outline of your nipples.

“That’s because you decided to be annoying and put the tv on max volume.” You say

"Well, maybe if you'd stop ignoring me and actually engaged in a conversation, I wouldn't have to resort to such measures.” his voice low and husky.

“So you did that to get my attention?” You ask.

"Maybe," he admits with a shrug, his gaze never leaving yours.

“Why? You want to have a ‘conversation’?” You ask.

He raises an eyebrow at your sarcasm but doesn't comment on it. "Yes, I do," he says evenly. "Unless you're just going to keep giving me the silent treatment.”

“…fine. I won’t.” You say.

"Good. I was hoping you'd see it my way." He takes a step closer, his tall frame looming over you, the air between you charged with tension. "So tell me, what's really going on with you? Why the attitude?”

“What attitude?” You ask.

He chuckles, a low, amused sound. "Don't play dumb with me. You're clearly upset about something." He leans in, his face inches from yours, his breath warm on your skin. "Why don't you just say it?”

“Ohh I don’t know… did you do anything to upset me?” You ask in a sarcastic way.

"Me? No, never." He says with a smug smile, but you can see the glint in his eyes.

“Then I guess I’m not upset.” You say with sarcasm.

"Not upset, huh? Well, it sure seems like you are.” he growls, his voice low and urgent.

“No, if you claim you did nothing to upset me, then im not upset. Why would I be upset?” You say with sarcasm.

His eyes narrow at your tone, his jaw clenched in irritation. "Because you're still avoiding eye contact, your body language screams 'fuck off,' and you're using sarcasm like a shield. Classic signs of someone who's trying to hide their true feelings.”

“Congratulations, took you long enough to notice.” You say.

Matt scoffs and rolls his eyes. "I don't need a condescending attitude, thank you very much." But then he takes a deep breath and tries again, his voice softer. "Look, I don't know what I did to piss you off, but I'm trying to have a real conversation here. You're not making it easy."

“Maybe I don’t want to have a conversation with someone who was supposed to be my best friend, ended up ghosting me when I move away, never explained why, and decides to come back after years pretending that everything is normal.” You let out.

His eyes widen at your words, and for a moment, he looks taken aback. He takes a step back, his expression softening. "Oh, fuck," he breathes, running a hand through his hair. "I had no idea you felt that way.”

“It wasn’t that hard to keep contact, you know. Your brothers did.” You say.

He looks down, shame creeping into his features. "I know, I know. I'm sorry, alright? I was a fucking idiot for letting so much time pass without reaching out. I got caught up in my own life and... and I messed up. Badly.”

“… whatever Matt.” You say and start walking away.

"No, no, wait." He calls out to you, taking a few hurried steps to catch up. "Please, don't walk away from me. I fucked up, I know. And I want the chance to make it right." He looks at you with earnest eyes, genuinely remorseful.

"I'm sorry," he repeats, his voice softer and more sincere than before. "I fucked up. I know I did. But I've missed you so much, man. I've realized that I can't just let things be without trying to make things right between us. Please forgive me?”

“Fine. I forgive you, it’s been years and I got over it a long time ago. But that doesn’t mean things will go back to normal.” You say.

He nods, understanding. "Yeah, I get that. But maybe that's okay. Maybe we can start fresh, build a new friendship based on who we are now, instead of trying to fit back into the mold of who we used to be." He shifts nervously, trying to gauge your reaction.

“Yeah” you let out a chuckle. “You turned out to be an annoying asshole.” You say jokingly letting out a laugh.

He laughs along with you, relieved that you're willing to give him another chance. "Well, you always had a way of calling me out on my shit," he says with a grin. "But hey, I promise I've been working on being a little less asshole-ish these days.”

“Mmhhh I don't think so, I mean first thing you did when you got here was snoop around my room.” You say and chuckle.

He groans, shaking his head and rolling his eyes. "Okay, okay, maybe I haven't completely changed yet," he admits with a laugh. “And it’s just that… I don’t know, you always act to innocent, and I know you’re not. So I just wanted to prove myself right.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” You say feigning innocence.

He laughs "Oh come on, don't play dumb with me. I'm not stupid, you know. I've seen the way you operate, always playing the sweet, innocent girl, but I know you're hiding something. That's just part of why I had to snoop around.”

“I think I'm going to start locking my room.” You laugh.

He chuckles and smirks at you. "Yeah, maybe you should. Or you know, you could just give in and tell me your secrets," he says playfully.

You chuckle. “Yeah, no way. Anyways it’s getting late and I want to shower before Nick and Chris get here so we can have dinner.” You say.

"Oh, sure thing. I'll let you get to it." He says. "I should probably head back to my room as well and grab a shower myself." He smiles at you, making his way to the door. "I'll see you later then, okay?”

You both go to your own rooms. You take a nice hot shower. When you get out you blow dry your hair and do the rest of your routine. Then you put on some clothes. Your mother is already downstairs making dinner for you guys so you decide to go down and help her. Dinner's ready and Chris and Nick get home. You all sit on the table and eat dinner, Matt sat next to you. Everything was going fine until you felt his hand on your thigh.

You feel his hand creeping up your thigh under the table. His fingers trail up your inner thigh, the touch light but unmistakable. You freeze, the fork halfway to your mouth. You can feel the heat of his skin against yours. His touch is bold, fingers splayed across your leg, and it sends a jolt of electricity through you.

You swallow the piece of food that you had in your mouth and give him a glare.

He smirks at you and leans in closer, whispering in your ear. "Mmm, your thighs are so soft," he murmurs, his voice low and husky, making sure no one saw or heard him. His fingers continue their trail, moving higher before finally coming to a stop just below the hem of your shorts.

“Matt. Stop.” You whisper back, pulling his hand away.

He withdraws his hand, but not before giving your thigh a quick squeeze. “What?" He feigns innocence, holding his hands up in a defensive gesture as if he didn't just grope you under the table. A devilish glint dances in his eyes as he leans back in his chair, smirking.

You glare at him and continue eating. After everyone’s done eating you help your mom pick up the table.

When the table is cleared and the dishes are put in the dishwasher, he comes over to you, his hand resting on your lower back. "Hey," he says softly.

“What?” You ask, avoiding eye contact.

He chuckles lowly and moves to stand in front of you, looking down at you with a smirk in his “Can we talk for a moment?”

“Maybe next time, right now I’m tired and want to go to bed.” You say lying.

"Aww, come on," he coos, his voice dripping with persuasion. "Just a few minutes of your time." He reaches out to gently tilt your chin up, forcing you to meet his gaze. The intensity in his eyes is unmistakable, a mix of desire and something more sinister.

As you look at him you feel yourself getting wetter, but you can’t let him win. “No. Sorry I'm just really tired.” You yawn.

He narrows his eyes, seeing right through your tired act. "Fine," he says, his voice clipped. "But know that this isn't over."

“I don’t know what you're talking about.” You say smiling and then walk away.

He watches you go, his eyes smoldering with a heated hunger. He knows he'll get what he wants eventually, but for now, he'll let you think you've won this round.

Next morning…

Nick and Chris had to leave early today for their event, so it was just you and Matt in the house.

As you wake up, you hear some sounds coming from the kitchen. You get up from your bed and put on some sweatpants and a tank top before you go to the kitchen to check what's going on. “What’s going on here? Why is there so much noise?”

Matt is standing at the counter, cracking eggs into a bowl and whisking them vigorously. He looks up and smirks at you as you enter, his eyes roaming over your casual morning attire. "Just making some breakfast," he says, his tone casual despite the heat in his gaze.

“Did Chris and Nick leave already?” You ask.

"Yep, they had an early call time for their event. So it's just us." He says with a smirk.

“Great.” You say sarcastically as you rub your eyes.

He laughs lightly at your sarcasm, but there's a touch of relief in his laughter. Now that it's just the two of you, he knows he has a better chance at getting what he wants. "Yeah, looks like it," he says, his voice low and full of promise.

You roll your eyes at his response. “Whatever. Don’t burn my house down. I'm gonna go take a shower.”

"Take your time," he says, his voice like honey, as if he's already imagining you in the shower, water cascading down your bare skin. He licks his lips and turns back to the stove, where he starts cooking the eggs.

You go upstairs to your room and start showering.

Downstairs, Matt's thoughts are consumed with you. He pictures you in the shower, your body slick and soapy under the water.

After some minutes you’re done showering and head to your room. You put on your black underwear set and start drying your hair, not noticing the door to your room is slightly opened.

When he’s going to his room he can’t help but notice your door is slightly open. He can't resist his curiosity. He quietly walks towards your room, stopping just outside the open door to sneak a peek. "Damn," he muttered under his breath as he peaked into your room. He sees you half-dressed and towel drying your hair. He felt his arousal spike as he watched the water dripping down the curves of your body.

Unaware of Matt's presence, you finish taking the excess water off your hair and decide to stay comfortable and put on an oversized shirt.

Matt swallows hard, his pulse racing as he drinks in the sight of you in your oversized shirt, leaving your legs exposed. He can't tear his gaze away. His eyes trailed down and admired your legs, feeling the heat of desire building up inside him. But he quickly left and went to his room so you wouldn’t notice.

You grab your phone and head out of your room.

He lays down on his bed, his mind still consumed with thoughts of you. He can't believe how sexy you looked even half-dressed. He groans softly as he starts to stroke his hardening cock, imagining you in more revealing states. "Fuck.” He hears you come out of your room and he decides to follow you. He quickly pulled up his sweatpants and opened the door to his room, seeing you in the hallway. “Hey, where are you going?”

“Hey.. I uhm I’m going down stairs.” You say. You obviously noticed the big bulge in his pants but try not to show it.

He smirks at your reaction, his eyes locked on yours with a knowing glint. "Downstairs, huh? I could join you." His voice is low and suggestive, the bulge in his pants straining against the fabric as he takes a step closer.

“No.” You say with a playful smile and start walking downstairs and make your way to the kitchen.

He watches as you descend the stairs, the hem of your oversized shirt riding up to reveal more of your bare legs. He groans again, the sound low and needy in his throat. He follows you to the kitchen, his gaze never leaving your body.

“I thought I told you no.” You say grabbing a drink from the fridge.

"Ah, but I'm a persistent man, aren't I?" He steps closer, his large frame towering over you as he leans against the counter, his eyes never leaving yours. The bulge in his pants is undeniable now, a physical manifestation of his desire.

“Mh, shows.” You say in a slightly sarcastic way.

A smirk plays on his lips as he catches your sarcasm, but there's an undercurrent of challenge in his gaze. He straightens up and moves closer, backing you against the counter. "Is that a problem, sweetheart?"

“It’s a little bit annoying.” You say and start walking towards the living room.

He quickly catches up to you, his hand reaching out to grasp your wrist tightly and stop you from walking away. "I think we're not quite done here," he says, his voice low and commanding. He pulls you back towards him.

“Ugh what the hell is your problem?” You say annoyed.

“My problem?” he says with a slightly offended tone in his voice. He keeps a firm grip on your wrist, his fingers digging in just enough to convey his dominance. "My problem?" he repeats, a hint of a chuckle in his voice. "I think you know exactly what my problem is.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You say.

His eyes narrow slightly at your response and his grip on your wrist tightens slightly at your continued ignorance. His other hand reaches up to cup your chin, forcing you to look at him. "Don't play games with me," he says in a rough tone. “My problem is that you’ve been trying to make me hard for the past 3 days.”

“No! You’ve tried to make me wet since you got here. So don’t start complaining about something you started.” You say frustrated.

He lets out a deep, rumbling laugh at your words, the sound sending a shiver down your spine. "So I make you wet, huh?" He tilts his head, his eyes searching yours.

You roll your eyes and avoid eye contact. “I’m not answering that.”

"Oh, I think you just did," he says with a smirk.

“Ugh fuck you Matt.” You say and pull away from his grip. You walk towards the living and sit on the couch turning on the tv.

He watches you storm off with a smug grin, clearly amused by your flustered reaction. He follows you to the living room. He sits down next to you on the couch, much closer than necessary, his thigh brushing against yours. “Are you wet right now?”

You feel your panties getting wetter as he asks that. “No.”

He chuckles low in his throat, his hand coming to rest on your exposed thigh. His touch is warm and possessive, sending tingles up your spine. "So you would have a problem with me checking" he murmurs, his breath hot against your ear. His hands moving slowly up.

You close your thighs. “Matt, stop.”

His smirk turns into a full-blown smile at your words and actions, clearly pleased with the effect he's having on you. He continues to tease you, his hand moving up to your waist, pulling you closer to him. "Stop what? Checking if you're wet for me?"

“You wish I was,” you say, giving him a little bit of attitude.

"Oh, I know you are," he says with a chuckle, his hand sliding further up your thigh.

“I’m trying to watch a movie.” You say and pull his hand away.

He raises an eyebrow, his smirk only growing wider as he hears the slightly breathless quality to your voice. "Mhm, sure you are," he murmurs, his hand moving back to your thigh and forcing your legs open. “I'm just going to check if you’re wet or not.” His hand moved further up, since you’re without pants he quickly reached your pantie.

You gasp at his action and bite your lip holding back a whine as he teases your clit through your damp panties.

He smirks at your reaction but doesn’t say anything; he just pulls out his fingers and pretends like nothing happened. “Let’s watch your movie.”

You quietly sit there trying to pay attention to the movie.

He watches you attempt to focus on the movie, a knowing glint in his eye. Every so often, his gaze drifts down to your lap, no doubt recalling the feel of your wet panties between his fingers. He faces the tv again but his fingers start creeping to your thighs until they reach your panties. He doesn’t say anything, he just ‘pays attention’ to the movie. Two of his fingers start moving in circular motion.

You nearly gasp at his touch, you look over at him but he’s facing the tv. As his fingers start to move you can’t help but hold up your whines and moans.

He smirks but his expression never faces your direction, instead, he keeps eye contact with the screen. His fingers continue to move and rub against you harder.

Without thinking you spread your legs wider giving him more access.

He smirks wider as he hears the soft gasp torn from your lips. The feeling when he sees you spread your legs wider, his finger moving against your clit in slow circles.

You whine needing to feel more friction. So your hips unconsciously start grinding on his fingers.

He loves seeing you like this, vulnerable and needy. He chuckles low in his throat as he feels you grinding on his fingers. His free hand comes to rest on your inner thigh, applying gentle pressure to keep you open for him. He whispers near your ear “fucking slut” as you’re about to cum he pulls away his fingers.

You let out a whine at the loss of contact.

His smirk is triumphant as he watches your reaction, knowing he's left you wanting. He turns to face you, his eyes dark with desire. "You’re a fucking slut, admit it." His voice is low and husky, sending shivers down your spine.

As vulnerable you are you still keep up with the attitude. “No. I’m not.”

He chuckles as he watches your squirm in need, the way you answer, keeping up with the attitude, hiding how needy you are for his touch. He knows it's a lie. “Yeah? You’re not?” He chuckles. “Like you didn’t just take my fingers without hesitation.”

He watches your expression carefully, waiting for you to back down from your defiance. When you remain silent, he leans in, his breath hot against your ear. "I could make you cum, right here, right now. All you have to do is admit it. Say the words, baby."

You look at him, your eyes filled with lust and desire. “Fuck… yes.” You say quietly.

He smirks, his lips curling up at your confession. "Yes, what?" His voice is soft yet demanding.

“Yes…I- I’m a slut.” You say in desperation for him to touch you.

He leans back in to whisper near your ear "That's right, you are." He watches your squirm under his gaze, his expression filled with satisfaction. His fingers move to your panties, teasing you as he spreads your wetness around. "Not just a slut, but my slut."

You whimper at his teasing. “Mh Matt please.”

He smirks as he hears your plea. "Please what, slut? Tell me exactly what you want." His fingers continue to tease your clit, applying just the right amount of pressure to keep you on the brink of climax.

“Please let me cum.” You whine.

"Ah, baby, you want to cum so bad, don't you?" His voice drips with seduction as he continues to torture your clit, his fingers expertly dancing around the sensitive spot. "Tell me, how much do you want it? How much do you need it?"

“Please Matt, I want to cum so bad.” You whimper.

Finally, Matt couldn't resist your begging and he pushes his fingers inside of you. He starts to finger you roughly while still rubbing your clit with his thumb. "Cum for me baby, cum all over my fingers." He orders as he feels you getting tense around his fingers.

“Mmmhp fuck” you moan.

He curses under his breath as he feels your walls tighten around his fingers, your moans becoming louder. He watches your face contorting in pleasure, feeling more satisfied with himself as he sees you getting closer to the edge.

“Mhh Matt I’m gonna cum” you moan feeling close.

He grins, his eyes flashing with excitement as he feels your impending orgasm. "That's it, baby, give it to me," he growls, finger-fucking you with abandon, his thumb pressing hard on your clit as he coaxes your climax from you. "Cum all over my fingers, slut,"

“Mmh fuck” you moan as you cum hard on his fingers.

"That's it, baby, let it out. So good, so fucking perfect," he praises, continuing to stroke you through your intense orgasm, prolonging the pleasure. As your spasms slowly subside, he pulls his fingers from your dripping pussy, bringing them to his lips. He sucks his fingers clean, a look of satisfaction on his face as he savors the taste of your cum. "Mmm, you taste so sweet, baby," he says, his eyes locked on yours, the connection between you crackling with energy.

He leans in, his lips brushing against yours in a soft, sensual kiss. The taste of your essence lingers on his tongue, a delicious reminder of the pleasure he's given you. His hand trails down your side, tracing the curve of your waist as he pulls you closer.

You moan into the kiss and move to his lap strangling him.

Matt grunts as you straddle him, your legs wrapping around his waist as you press your body against his. He can feel the heat radiating from between your thighs, the evidence of your arousal soaking through his pants and leaving a wet spot on his lap.

He groans, his hands moving to cup your ass, pulling you in closer as he deepens the kiss. His tongue explores your mouth, dancing with yours in a sensual rhythm. "You're so fucking wet for me, aren't you?" he breathes against your lips, his voice low and husky with desire. He's hard beneath you, his cock straining against his pants as he grinds against your core. "You want this, don't you?

You nod and keep kissing him letting out muffled moans.

"That's it, baby, show me how much you want it," he growls, his hands gripping your ass tightly as he grinds his hips up against yours. He breaks the kiss to trail his lips down your neck, nipping and sucking at the sensitive skin, leaving marks.

Matt groans, his hands moving to cup your breasts through the thin fabric of your shirt. "You're so fucking sexy" he whispers huskily, his voice dripping with lust. He can't get enough of you, your moans driving him wild with desire. He pulls your top down, revealing your breasts. "Fuck, look at you,"

He trails his finger over your bare breasts, teasing your nipples until they harden beneath his touch. He then leans down to take them into his mouth, sucking and swirling his tongue around them, sending waves of pleasure coursing through your body. "You like that, baby?"

“Mhm” you moan and keep grinding against him.

"That's right, grind on my cock," he groans, his hands gripping your hips to meet your movements. He continues to suck and nibble on your nipples, his mouth hot and eager against your skin. "I can feel how much you want this, how much you need to be filled up."

He continues to grind against you, his cock throbbing in anticipation as he whispers dirty promises into your ear. "I'm going to make you scream my name, baby. I'm going to fuck you so hard that you won't be able to walk straight tomorrow."

“Please Matt” you whimper. He picks you up and takes you to his room.

He carries you to his bedroom, his lips still trailing hot kisses along your neck and collarbone. He lays you down on the bed, his body hovering over yours as he continues to kiss and nip at your skin. He trails his fingers down your body, stopping to circle over your nipples before continuing further south. "I need to taste you," he growls, his voice low and full of desire. He moves down between your legs, spreading them apart as he goes.

He buries his face between your thighs, his tongue delving into your slick heat as he devours you. He groans at the taste of your arousal, his fingers digging into your hips as he eats you out with wild abandon.

“Mmhf Fuck Matt” you moan as you arch your back.

His name is music to his ears as he doubles his efforts, his tongue thrusting deep into your pussy as he sucks on your clit. He can feel your walls fluttering around his tongue, your juices dripping down his chin as he feasts on your arousal.

"Fuck yes, baby, you taste amazing," he groans against your sensitive flesh, his words muffled but filled with desire. He continues his relentless assault on your clit, his tongue flicking and circling the swollen bud as he drives you closer to the edge.

“I’m so close” you moan.

He can hear the need in your voice and he knows you're close. He sucks harder on your clit, his fingers slipping inside you to fill the space his tongue leaves behind, thrusting deep and rubbing against the rough patch of skin on the roof of your pussy.

You let out a loud moan as you cum hard on his tongue.

"Yes, that's it, cum for me baby," he growls, his face buried between your thighs as he laps up every drop of your release. He keeps his tongue pressed against your spasming pussy, prolonging your orgasm and milking you of every last tremor.

He grins against your thighs, satisfied with the reaction he got from you. He slowly pulls his tongue and fingers out of you, savoring the lingering taste of your arousal and the slick feeling of your release on his skin. "You taste so fucking good, baby,”

He presses a tender kiss to your sensitive, still-quivering flesh before crawling up your body, his mouth and chin glistening with your juices. "I need to be inside you now," he growls, his cock hard and ready against your thigh.

“Mhm please Matt” you whine.

“Oh, baby, you're so wet and ready for me.” He positions himself at your entrance, the head of his cock pressing against your opening. He looks down at you, his eyes burning with desire. "You want me to fuck you, baby? You want me to make you cum again?"

“Yes Matt please”

He smirks a little at your eager answer before thrusting himself inside you. He groans at the feeling of being surrounded by your tight heat, his cock slipping in easily thanks to how wet you are. "Fuck, you're so tight, baby.”

“Ahh Matt you’re so big” you whimper arching your back.

"I know, baby, and you feel amazing wrapped around me," he groans as he starts to move, pulling back slowly before thrusting in deep again. He sets a steady, relentless pace, each stroke hitting that special spot inside you that makes your toes curl and your walls flutter around his cock.

You moan loudly, your walls tightening more with each thrust.

"You like that, baby? You like me fucking you hard?" He grunts, leaning down to suck a mark onto your neck, just above your collarbone, his thrusts becoming rougher, his cock slamming into your cervix with each hit, with each thrust, his jaw clenched in effort as he tries to hold back his own orgasm.

“Mhhmp oh god Matt i'm going to cum” you moan pathetically as you feel that knot in your stomach about to explode.

"Cum for me, baby! I want to feel you squeeze my cock as you come undone," he growls, his thrusts becoming erratic and forceful as he chases his own release. The base of his shaft pulses against your clit with each movement, providing additional stimulation that pushes you over the edge.

Your moans nearly come out as screams of pleasure as you squirt all over is cock.

"Fuck yes!" Matt groans loudly, nearly losing his balance as you squirt, the feeling nearly triggering his own release. His hips thrust frantically as he does his best to prolong the pleasure, the pulsing of his cock growing more and more erratic as he releases inside you.

"Mmmhhh... so fucking good..." He sighs as he collapses onto you, his chest heaving as he tries to catch his breath, his still-throbbing cock buried deep inside you.

Your legs still shaking a bit from your orgasm when you hear sound coming from the hallway.

“Matt, Y/n where are you guys?” Nick asks.

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nadvs · 3 days ago

Text

hard to ignore (two-shot) (part one)

pairing singledad! zach maclaren x nanny! female reader

summary when you’re offered a job as a nanny, you can tell right away that you’ll grow fond of the little girl you’re taking care of. things are easy to manage until you realize you’re falling for her dad.

author’s note hugs to @nemesyaaa for sharing the idea of singledad!zach. i couldn’t stop writing (and the one-shot hit 15k words and became a two-shot… i love slowburn…) hurt and comfort. fluff. no smut. divider credit.

content warning parental abandonment

» masterlist

Zach is sure, without a doubt, that he has already lived the best day of his life.

The moment he held Ella in his arms was when the world bloomed into a color he didn’t know existed. Nothing could ever and would ever top that feeling.

He didn’t expect that before thirty, he’d already experience the worst day of his life, too. But he’s certain he has.

He was in a fog, a bad dream he kept trying to wake himself up from. He had stepped into the guest room to see a piece of paper on Jade’s bed and he knew before he even unfolded the letter that she was gone.

He read the last line of the letter over and over again. I can’t live like this anymore. Deep down, he always feared that she would give up on them. But not like this. And not this soon.

After Ella was born, bitterness permanently etched itself into Jade’s face. To her, the baby was always a mistake and Zach stopped being someone she loved and became nothing but the man she regretfully had a child with.

She became the antithesis of the girl he fell for. The love they’d once had was replaced with a cold distance. She started sleeping in the guest room. She ate her meals alone. She left the house as much as she could.

Still, he respected that she had learned to tolerate motherhood. While she didn’t love being a stay-at-home mom, he didn’t think she hated it.

But then she left. And if she could abandon them like this, four years in, not even having it in her to look into her little girl’s eyes to say goodbye, then that tolerance had a cruel end.

That’s why now, a month after her sudden departure, Zach is sitting in his living room, fingers curling the corner of the resume belonging to the woman scheduled to arrive in a few minutes.

Dishes clatter as his mother tidies up his kitchen. Normally, he’d feel guilty and nag her to sit down. But things aren’t normal and he’ll take all the help he can get. It’s been an uphill battle trying to pick up the pieces on his own.

His family drove in a few nights ago. They offered to visit as soon as he called with the news, but he didn’t want to put Ella through too much at once, so he waited a few weeks. Once he asked them to come, they dropped everything and set out for the four-hour car ride.

Ella’s playing in the backyard with her grandpa and aunt while Connie helps Zach run interviews. His team’s managers were understanding when he asked for time off, but Zach can’t be away forever. With his training and match schedule, he needs to find a nanny.

He’d rather not introduce a new person into her life, especially this soon, but it’s unavoidable. At least with a nanny, he can control that Ella will always be in the comfort of her home. A place she knows.

Moments like these, he wishes he hadn’t been drafted to a team a state away. If he’d stayed close to his hometown, Ella would see both sets of grandparents more often and he’d have dependable childcare until he figured out how to function as a single dad.

Zach looks over his shoulder through the window, swallowing the lump in his throat when he sees his daughter running circles around her grandpa in the morning sun. The chime of the doorbell throws him out of his trance.

Soft blue eyes meet yours when the door swings open. The stranger on the other side is tall and handsome and younger than you expected, his half-smile clouded by sorrow. You introduce yourself and he offers you a firm but gentle handshake.

“Nice to meet you,” he says. “I’m Zach. Come in.”

You trail him into the large house, mind already racing with the potential of it becoming your workplace. The agency had set up the interview. You don’t know much about the client, except that he has a four-year-old daughter and that he requested a nanny who’s adaptable to a changing schedule.

After meeting Ella’s grandmother, you settle on a couch and make small talk and answer their questions. You learn that Zach is a professional soccer player and that his work can be demanding and inconsistent, but with your apartment being close by, you assure him that you’re reliable and flexible.

By the end of the interview, the idea of a nanny doesn’t make Zach nearly as uneasy as it did an hour ago. You’re kind and experienced and knowledgeable and every time you see his little girl through the window, you smile in pure endearment.

Zach likes the idea of his daughter being around someone joyful. Jade grew to be so cold that Ella learned to go to her dad whenever she wanted to feel reassured and loved. It’s comforting to imagine her growing to like you, maybe even love you, and to be met with the same warmth she’s so full of.

The rest of the interviews go fine, but Zach has always operated on gut feelings and you’re a clear winner. His mom agrees.

────୨ৎ────

After an agency rep calls to tell you that you’ve been offered a trial period, you spend five days at the house getting to know Ella while Zach shadows to answer your questions. He’s friendly and helpful, but visibly tense.

The final afternoon, you’re playing with Ella in the living room when Zach’s phone rings. Ella rushes over to his side, asking if it’s her mommy calling. You notice the nervous way his jaw clenches when he kneels to the floor.

“It’s grandma,” he tells her, holding his phone out so the camera will capture them both.

You pretend you didn’t hear Ella's question. You know nothing about her mom and you wouldn’t dare risk crossing a boundary by asking.

Soon after the call, Ella’s drawing at the dining table while you and Zach periodically glance across the room to check on her from the kitchen. He’s been teaching you how he prepares Ella’s favorite foods. He likes that you write everything down, asking him for details down to exact measurements. If he wasn’t sure that you took the happiness of his daughter seriously before, he is now.

He already told the story to his family and to Jade’s parents and to his closest friends, but that was with people he knew well. People who could comfort him. He’s not sure how to share with you that she left, but he wants to hire you, and this is something you should be aware of.

After he slides a pan into the oven, he stands to face you, towering over you as he wipes his hands with a tea towel.

“You have the job if you want it,” Zach says quietly. You smile at him appreciatively. You weren’t feeling confident, considering how on edge he’s been, but you realize it must not have been you he was nervous about.

“Thank you,” you reply. “I do.”

He nods, looking down as he leans against the kitchen island, and says, “She starts kindergarten next fall. You’d be alright with part-time hours then?”

“Yes.”

“Good. Uh, you should know…” he says, turning his head to look over at his daughter, “her mom left. A little over a month ago. It was out of the blue.”

Your heart twists in pain at his words, at the agony that draws itself into his face.

“I’m so sorry,” you say, staring up at his profile. Zach blinks a few times, gazing at his daughter. You press your lips together, wishing you knew what to say.

“Ella didn’t get a goodbye,” he tells you. Neither did he, not a real one, but that’s irrelevant. “I told her that her mom chose to leave and I don’t know why she made that choice, but I’m not going anywhere. If she brings it up, please say the same.”

“I will,” you reply with an understanding nod, “and only if she mentions it first.”

“Thank you,” Zach says. “I’ll be honest with you. I really don’t want someone to leave her again. You are planning on staying as long as we need you, right? Even when the hours get shorter during the school year?”

He had that same note of desperation in his voice when he asked you about your commitment to the job during the interview, too.

“Yes,” you assure him. “I understand that she needs stability right now.”

Based on the way Zach’s eyes lower, you can tell he needs stability, too. His wife not only left him, but she left him with their child. You can’t imagine the hole that it dug in his heart.

“Thanks,” he says. He takes a breath. He wasn’t strong enough not to cry when he told Ella her mom was gone and he’ll always hate himself for it, but at least he kept his tears from falling this time.

“Do you want to ask her what she thinks about it?” you offer. “I can go put away her laundry to give you some privacy.”

Zach nods in agreement. And as he expected, when he asks his daughter if she’d like for you to hang around here more often after he goes back to work, she gives him an enthusiastic yes.

You’re purposely slow with the laundry to give them time. You come back into the kitchen to see Ella happily eating a freshly baked muffin and swinging her feet, smiling up at her father as he sits next to her at the dining table.

“My daddy said you’re gonna be here every day,” she says to you with a grin, overjoyed by the news.

“Not every day,” Zach corrects her gently. “But most days.”

“Try this!” Ella exclaims, stretching her arm out towards you, the muffin in her fist. The way you happily accept the food even though it’s reduced to smushed fragments in his child’s small hand makes Zach’s heart feel a little lighter.

“That’s delicious,” you say after you take a bite, settling at the table across from them.

Zach’s still getting used to having a woman around who’s so sweet to his child. Jade would hardly ever accept Ella’s offers to share her food, telling him that saying yes to everything would only raise a spoiled child.

“My daddy’s the bestest cook,” she proudly says.

“Best,” Zach corrects. “Thank you, honey.”

“He really is,” you reply. “I don’t know how I’ll fill his shoes, but I’ll try my best.”

Ella’s face pinches in confusion as she kneels over in her booster seat to look under the table.

“I think his shoes will be too big for you,” she mumbles, pointing to your feet. You laugh, meeting Zach’s gaze, seeing the first genuine smile on his face. You didn’t know he had dimples.

He can’t remember the last time he laughed, really laughed, with someone like this. Life’s dealt him a tough hand, but you’ve given him relief.

────୨ৎ────

Zach is organized. So organized that it sort of amazes you. Not only does he give you his, and in turn, your work schedule a month in advance through a color-coded calendar, but he also provides you with a meal plan for Ella so that you don’t have to worry about making one yourself.

The first day on your own with her is perfect. She’s energetic, well-behaved, and loves to talk. Zach left for training at noon and you were surprised that he found the time to text as much as he did. You replied to his every message asking for updates, sharing what you’re doing and reassuring him that Ella’s doing okay.

He gets home an hour after Ella’s bedtime. He’s been on edge all day, worrying that all this was too much, too fast for his little girl. Maybe he should have taken more time off.

You’re finishing up loading the dishwasher when you hear his keys jingling. You turn to greet him as he paces into the kitchen.

“Hey, how was bedtime?” he asks.

“We read three books and she asked me to stay with her until she fell asleep,” you tell him. “No issues.”

Zach sighs in relief. He never liked afternoon training because he missed bedtime. Ella preferred bedtime with her dad over with her mom. She preferred everything with her dad, really. But hearing that she wanted you to stay is reassuring.

“And she ate well?” he asks. He settles on one of the stools lining the kitchen counter, watching you cross the room to stand opposite him.

“Yes,” you tell him. “She was great.”

“Sorry if I was annoying with all the texts,” he says with a small, apologetic smile.

“You weren’t, but I wanted to let you know that it’s okay if you want to set up cameras. I know some parents like having live video they can tune into throughout the day.” You’d already noticed the security cameras outside when you first came to the house. You understand why he’d be so protective.

Zach threads his fingers through his dirty blond hair, damp from the shower he took in the training center’s locker room.

“Alright, I was definitely annoying if you’re offering to be surveilled,” he mumbles with a chuckle.

“No,” you laugh. “Ella did get a little frustrated, though. We were playing princesses and she said princesses aren’t supposed to go on their phones this much.”

Zach breathes a laugh. You’ve only been here for six days, but he hasn’t smiled this much in a long time.

“Thank you for all your work today,” he says. “I won’t keep you any longer.” You give him a bright smile and wish him a good night before you head out.

When Zach trudges upstairs, he peeks into Ella’s room. She’s sleeping peacefully, curled up with her favorite plushie. Now that he has a semblance of normalcy back in his life, he realizes that beneath the sadness and betrayal, he feels anger.

It’s not typical of him to feel angry. But Jade set everything ablaze when she abandoned them and he’s been left in the ashes, trying to stay level-headed while he’s choking on smoke.

He knows he lost Jade’s heart long ago. She lost his, too. It’s the fact that she broke their daughter’s without any hesitation – that’s what kills him.

────୨ৎ────

Zach never takes you up on the offer to have cameras installed. He starts to let go, little by little, eventually going a full day without sending a single check-in text. It’s gratifying to know you’ve earned his trust.

Before you know it, you’ve been Ella’s nanny for two months. She’s made herself a home in your heart. The only way you’d ever leave her is if you were told to, and you can’t even imagine being fired. Zach often checks in to see if you’re happy with your job and asks if there’s anything he can do to make things better. He clearly values you and doesn’t want to lose you.

It’s mid-morning when you’re playing with Ella on the living room floor and Zach comes through the front door. She rushes to him and you smile as you watch him drop his duffle bag and happily scoop his daughter up.

He had an away game last night and flew in early. His skin is blanched, dark half-circles under his eyes, but like always, he finds energy for his daughter. You admire it about him, how she’s never too much for him.

“There’s a plate for you in the kitchen,” you tell him when he meets your gaze.

“You don’t have to–”

“I know,” you say with a laugh. Zach has already told you many times that Ella’s the only one you have to feed, but you can tell he appreciates coming home to a meal. “There were leftovers.”

“Were there?” he asks, brows quirked, an unconvinced smirk on his lips.

You shrug and laugh again. You’ve grown into a friendly level of comfort with each other and you appreciate how you can joke around with him.

Zach sits in the dining room to eat, listening to Ella tell him all about her playdate yesterday. You tidy up the living room as you overhear her chat about how her friend was showing her ballet poses and how badly she wants lessons.

You’d sent Zach a courtesy text before you fell asleep in the guest room last night: We had a great day. She had a lot of fun on the playdate. Just so you’re prepared, she’s VERY into ballet now and is going to ask you if she can get lessons. Sending some options. Then, you sent him a few links to children’s dance classes in town.

You woke up to two texts from him. The first said: Appreciate the warning and the research. Am I crazy for holding on to hope that she’ll like soccer one day? You smiled at your screen. You’d briefly talked with Zach about how Ella has no interest in the sport her father dedicated his career to.

The second text from him, sent fifteen minutes later, read: Would you be alright with taking her to 6-6:45 pm classes on Wednesdays when I can’t? The season starts next week.

You replied when you woke up: Definitely.

You enter the dining room to see Ella hanging off her dad’s shoulders while he tries to eat, continuing to rattle on about how she’d never miss a lesson and would always listen in class.

“Alright, take a breath,” he chuckles. When he tells her you found her a class at a studio uptown and that he’ll enroll her if she’s sure she can commit, she squeals in delight. She hugs Zach, then runs over to hug you, too, nearly knocking you over.

“Easy,” her dad tells her. Ella asks you to turn on the ballet music playlist you found for her yesterday and launches into twirls across the living room.

“Remember what I said,” you tell her over the music. “If you start to get dizzy, you…?”

“Sit down, I know!” she shouts. You meet Zach’s eyes, both of you wearing smiles. You can see the fatigue on his face under the bright dining room light.

“Do you want me to stay another hour so you can catch up on sleep?” you offer. “I don’t mind.”

He knows his heart shouldn’t skip when he looks at you, but it does. He can’t help it. You don’t see this as a job you clock in and out of. You’ve integrated yourself into Ella’s life, into his life, so seamlessly. He doesn’t feel like you’re an employee here. You’re a friend who goes above and beyond to help. You’re someone who his daughter adores. You’re a beautiful person, inside and out.

He looks down at his plate, embarrassed, as if you can read his mind. His head has been doing this lately, rushing into thoughts of you that are much more than professional. He shouldn’t be thinking that his daughter’s nanny is beautiful.

“It’s okay,” he tells you. “You can head home. We’ll see you soon.”

You nod and call Ella over to look at the calendar Zach made. It’s a routine with her every time you leave. She likes knowing when you’ll be back.

When Zach heads upstairs to drop his things off into his bedroom, he stops when he passes the guest room. You left the door ajar. Even though you always keep it neat, only leaving an overnight bag on the nightstand, there’s a lived in feeling, a warmth in the room that never existed before.

Once again, he has to remind himself that you’re paid to be here. But it’s hard not to like you, because even when Jade was living here, he felt alone, whereas having you around makes it hard to ignore that life doesn’t feel all that empty anymore.

────୨ৎ────

“Which one’s yours?”

You look over to the man sitting next to you on the dance studio bleachers. Young girls hop and whirl over the glossy hardwood floor in a sea of pink tutus, five minutes into their lesson.

“Oh, I’m...” You point to Ella. “Her nanny.”

Ella’s been in ballet for a few weeks now and it’s all she talks about. Zach’s schedule allows him to take her to most of her classes, but this is the second one you’ve come to and you can see just how much she enjoys it.

You make small-talk with the man and a few other parents, which makes the time pass quickly. When you get back to the house, Ella scarfs down her dinner and falls asleep during the first book you read her. You’re sitting in the living room when Zach comes home from training.

He’s nearing playoff season and he’s mentioned that he has much more practices booked in his schedule. At this point, he welcomes how you always pretend to accidentally make too much food. He doesn’t expect you to prepare meals for him, but after you’d reassured him that you don’t mind since you’re cooking anyway, he’s relieved to know he’ll have dinner waiting for him tonight.

“Hey,” you greet him from your spot on the couch. “Ballet was the best idea ever. It really tires her out. Bedtime was a breeze.”

“Right?” Zach says with a smile, pulling off his jacket. You look away to avoid gaping at his biceps under his t-shirt. You thought he was good-looking the moment you met him and getting to know him has only made him more attractive.

“I’ve been wanting to ask if you’d like any help with her birthday,” you offer, turning the tv off and standing up. Ella’s fifth birthday is in a month.

“I have some ideas for her party that I’d like your opinion on,” Zach tells you. “Do you want to stay for a few minutes? Or I can just text you.”

“I can stay.”

He’s relieved to hear it. He doesn’t have many moments with you alone. Usually you’re like passing ships in the night, chatting for just a couple of minutes to catch each other up about Ella before one of you leaves the house, so any window of time with you is something he welcomes. Your presence is comforting.

You sit at the kitchen island together. Zach eats as you scroll through his phone, gazing at screenshots of party ideas he saved.

“Oh, she’d love this,” you say, stopping at a photo of ballerina-themed cupcakes. He gazes at you in awe as you look down at the screen. You’re genuinely delighted at the idea of giving his little girl a perfect birthday. “Do you want to have the party here?”

“Yeah, do you think that’s a good idea?” he asks.

“Yeah. If you’re worried about decorating or cleaning up, I’d come early and stay late,” you tell him, continuing to scroll. “She deserves something big.”

He nods, swallowing down his food, too distracted to go for another bite. He can’t wrap his head around how sweet you are. You have no connection to Ella at all, but you treat her like she’s yours. Sometimes more than her own mother did.

You’ve been here for nearly four months now, which in the grand scheme of things really isn’t that long, but he likes that you have such a deep sincerity to you that he can trust that you care about Ella. That you won’t leave.

You look up at him and he glances away, worried he’s been caught staring, clearing his throat.

“Do you know how many people you’re thinking of inviting?” you ask as you hand him back his phone.

Zach’s face falls as he scratches the back of his neck. You’re suddenly tense, the air of familiarity between you now thick and uncomfortable.

“I’m not sure,” he says.

“Sorry,” you say, nervous you crossed a line. “I didn’t mean to overstep.”

“You didn’t,” he reassures you. “Sorry. I’ve just been going back and forth on whether I should invite her grandparents. From her mom’s side, I mean.”

“That must be hard,” you empathize.

“They’ve offered to visit a few times, but Ella hated the idea. She doesn’t even want to talk to them on the phone.”

“Was she like that before?” You don’t have to spell it out for him to know what you mean by before. The topic of Ella’s mom’s abandonment has been a silent cloud hanging over both of you.

“No,” Zach says. “I think she makes the connection that they’re her mom’s parents and she doesn’t want to be reminded of her.”

His lips close into a firm line.

“Well, I admire how you respect her comfort level and let her make decisions,” you say. “Maybe you start the conversation about who to invite and mention the grandparents to gauge her reaction?”

Zach nods, trying not to let his heart get carried away with the way it pounds from your words. He’s received compliments on his parenting from his friends and family, but you see the type of father he is more than anyone else these days. He cares about your opinion and it feels good to hear you approve.

“That’s a good idea,” he says. His fork clatters against his dish and he takes a deep breath before asking what’s been spinning in his head. “I figure you’d tell me, but… she hasn’t mentioned her mom, has she?”

You shake your head no. His forehead wrinkles in concern and it sends a pang to your chest. You lean a little closer, crossing the invisible boundary between you for the first time.

“She could just be processing,” you tell him. “And it might take her a while to talk about it. But she’s okay. She’s resilient. She got it from you.”

Zach hopes that he’s not blushing, but his cheeks are burning. He’s sure you’d be able to tell, but thankfully, you look down and stand straight again, as if what you just said wasn’t one of the most significantly unforgettable things he’s ever been told.

Ella is practically a physical copy of her mother. Zach never minded. But hearing that you think his daughter inherited his adaptability, one thing he’s always prided himself on, feels good.

He wasn’t very confident that he’s been doing a great job at adjusting since Jade left and you just lifted a weight off his shoulders without even realizing it.

“Thank you,” he says. You desperately want to ask how he’s been since his wife left, but you’re afraid you’ve already crossed a line with your boss tonight and you certainly don’t want to risk doing it again.

“Sure,” you reply. “I should go. But I’ll let you know if I think of any ideas for the party. I think the ballerina theme is the way to go. This place will be so pink.”

Zach laughs, trying to ignore the way his chest hollows when you expand the distance between you, stepping away.

“Can’t wait,” he says. “Thanks for dinner.”

“There were leftovers,” you reply, even though both of you are already well aware that every time you say that, it’s not true.

────୨ৎ────

It’s only half an hour into Ella’s birthday party and you’re spent. You’re reaching for napkins from the cupboard to clean up a spill in the dining room. When you turn out of the kitchen, a girl runs past you, tripping and accidentally pouring most of her juice onto your dress.

“Sorry,” she says worryingly, eyes wide as she stares up at you.

“It’s okay,” you reply with a giggle, dabbing at the fabric with one of the napkins. “I came prepared.”

Zach just entered the room, witnessing the moment, wondering if he’s ever going to see you do anything that won’t just push him deeper into his crush on you. But once again, his head is no match for his heart when it comes to you.

He’s been trying not to lose his mind today and it’s not because of the chaotic party that’s taken over his house. It’s because it’s the first time he’s seen you in a dress. While it’s appropriate for the occasion, it shows enough of your figure to make his mouth go dry.

You toss the napkin in the garbage, collect more, then start to make your way to the dining room, looking up to find Zach’s eyes.

“Hey,” you say over the noise. He realizes that your voice somehow settles his pulse and makes it race at the same time. “There might not be enough napkins in the world for this party.”

“Invite everyone she wants,” he teases, imitating the way you convinced him to go along with Ella’s idea to invite all twelve kids from her ballet class.

“I take it back,” you chuckle. When you move past him, the fresh scent of his cologne dances over you and it’s so nice that you don’t want to leave his side. But you shake away the thought and tidy up the spill, then head to the living room to mingle.

It’s better to keep your distance from Zach. You have to remind yourself of it almost every day now. You’d been spending more time together to plan Ella’s party and at this point, it’s actually frustrating how kind and funny and charming and perfect he is.

It took a few evenings of party-planning at the house, your voices low as Ella slept upstairs, to start to get to know each other outside of your job. You’ve learned little things about him, like that he’s left-handed, and that he has a sister ten years younger than him and growing up with her helped him practice parenting, and that he likes a cup of tea before bed because it relaxes him.

You also noticed that he drifts into a more timid version of himself whenever the topic of his profession comes up. You’d mentioned that Ella could eventually grow an interest in soccer, that you’d take her to one of his home games if she wanted, and he nodded with a shy smile, saying he liked the idea.

Every side of him is intriguing, and while your conversations haven’t fallen into anything too personal, you want to know more about him past the friendly distance that stands between you.

Ella quickly darts past Zach in the kitchen and he reminds her that tag is an outside game. He’s relieved that she seems happy and careless today.

He’d asked her about inviting her mom’s parents and she answered with a quiet no. He called them to tell them that this birthday would be too difficult to celebrate together and they understood, opting to send a present in the mail.

Zach is glad he took your advice. As he rounds the corner, he sees you chatting with Ella’s friend’s dad. You probably know him from ballet. Zach has spoken with him, too. He knows the man is divorced.

Jealousy swirls in his chest. He shouldn’t care about you talking to another man. Even though you’ve started to share more about your lives with each other and he’s pretty sure you’re single, you could have a boyfriend you haven’t mentioned.

Again, while he tells himself not to feel things for you, it’s so much easier said than done. He has to look away, wondering why he feels like someone who’s not even his is being taken from him.

All the stress leaves your body the minute the last attendee leaves through the front door. It was a great party, but it was exhausting.

Ella’s eating her dinner as you, Zach, and his family tackle the mess. You make conversation with her while you clean the kitchen, happy to hear her rave about what a good birthday she had.

She asks if you can cuddle her for bedtime. Zach overhears and trudges into the kitchen, crumpled decorations in his hands. He rolled the sleeves of his shirt up and you try to ignore the fact that the mere sight of his forearms makes your stomach go numb with butterflies.

“It’s been a long day,” he says to you quietly. “I can take bedtime.”

“I got it,” you reply. He mirrors your smile. You like that he’s not the type of parent to be bitter that his own kid prefers you sometimes. He’s just happy that Ella’s happy.

When you’re leaning back in Ella’s bed, chatting as you wait for her to doze off, her arm is draped over your body and her cheek is on your shoulder. She’s grown to be totally comfortable with you, always taking the opportunity to be affectionate.

Your eyelids are heavy as you ramble about what she’ll be doing with her grandparents and aunt in the next few days, as they’ll be staying in town for a bit. Zach gave you the next three days off since childcare will be covered.

“I heard your grandma say something about taking you to the beach tomorrow,” you tell her. “Are you excited?”

“Will you come, too?” she asks. You chuckle softly, kissing the top of her head.

“I have work, remember?” you tell her. You and Zach had decided long ago that you don’t want to tell her you’re paid to be here, that your job is taking care of her. You always just refer to yourself as her dad’s friend.

“Okay,” she sighs. She lets out a big yawn. “If I tell someone my birthday wish, will it not become true anymore?”

“I’m pretty sure the rule is that you can tell one grown-up,” you play along, “and it’ll still come true.” She nuzzles in. You assume she’ll mention a gift she wanted but didn’t receive today.

“I wished that you were my mommy,” she mumbles into the dark.

Your throat tightens and your heart sinks and you hate that the sweet, innocent child clinging onto you has to carry the weight of being abandoned. You kiss the top of her head again and try not to cry.

“I love you, okay?” you tell her. She nods and squeezes you tighter and within minutes, her breathing grows deeper.

When you head downstairs, you see that almost all of the mess has been tidied up. Zach is hauling a full garbage bag to the front door, giving you a tired smile when he sees you.

“Do you need any help with–”

“Go home,” he interrupts, faking irritation. You laugh in defeat.

“Fine.” You step into the living room to say goodbye to his family, antsy to have some time to yourself so that you don’t have to force down your tears any longer.

A few seconds after the door shuts behind you, Zach remembers that he’d set aside a container of leftover treats from the party for you.

You pace down the sidewalk into the cool evening air, unlocking your car remotely, unable to stop your tears from building. When you hear Zach call your name, you quickly wipe at your eyes, realizing you’ve smudged your make-up.

“There were leftovers,” he says when you turn to look at him.

“That’s my line,” you try to joke. You take the container. “Thanks.”

He notices the shine in your eyes immediately.

“Are you alright?” Zach asks softly. You gaze up at him, heart breaking a little more at the concern in his expression.

“Just a busy day,” you tell him.

“Did something happen?”

“No,” you say quickly. “Or– yeah, but I was going to tell you later. Without the tears.” You offer a pathetic laugh to break the tension, but he’s too worried to laugh, too.

“What is it?” he asks.

You look up to Ella’s bedroom window. The first time you’d walked up to this house, you were oblivious to the fact that the two people living in it would steal your heart. You know you need to tell him what his daughter said. But you’d hoped you’d have more time to process it.

“Before bed,” you say, your voice thin, “she told me she wished I was her mom.”

It takes all the air out of Zach’s lungs. He opens his mouth to reply, but he’s without words. He crosses his arms, looking down at the pavement.

“I know. It’s a lot,” you mumble. Your temples ache as more tears build up, frustrated that this is Zach and Ella’s reality. “It just makes me so sad. I don’t want to say anything bad about your ex-wife, but I don’t understand how she could just leave you two. Has she not called to check in on her? Or to wish her a happy birthday?”

Your heart starts to thrum even harder. Your words were impulsive, surprising you even though you’re the one who said them, and the fear that you just crossed a line and exposed your feelings for him rushes through you.

“No,” is all Zach is able to say. He stares at you, speechless, biting the inside of his cheek.

“When Ella said… what she said, I told her that I love her,” you say. “I hope that’s okay.”

“Of course it is,” he says, his tone tender. Your lips twist into a sad smile. You want to hug him. But you step back. Because he’s still your boss and you don’t want him to think you can’t remain professional. You’re already anxious and regretful that you brought up Ella’s mom.

“Thank you,” you say. “I should go. Good night.”

Zach’s dazed the rest of the evening. He watches you drive off. He goes back inside to finish cleaning up. He spends time with his parents and sister, but soon heads upstairs to sleep, too distracted to keep up conversation.

His mind keeps him awake as he lies in bed. He stares up at the darkened ceiling, watching the shadow of the trees by his window rustle in the wind. In a matter of a minute, your relationship reached a new level of vulnerability.

And now that he has time to wade through his feelings, beneath the pain he feels for Ella and what she told you, he can’t deny that his heart fluttered when you said you don’t understand how someone could leave him and his daughter. Maybe you feel the same way about him.

This is not just a crush. He’s falling for you.

────୨ৎ────

You stare at the text Zach sent you a few minutes ago as you brush your teeth the next morning.

Sorry for bothering you on your day off but Ella has asked me about 50 times (give or take) if I can ask you to come to the beach today. I told her you’re busy but you know her. No pressure but we’d all love to have you. Would count as a work day, of course.

It was already hard to keep your feelings for Zach at bay when all you can think about is his smile and his voice and the way he makes you feel more comfortable than any man ever has, but now, you’re afraid it might be awkward when you see him. You’d said something so heavy last night, then left abruptly.

Nonetheless, the love you have for Ella and the love you’re starting to have for Zach is louder than the worry you’re feeling.

You reply: Don’t count it as work. It’s how I’d like to spend my day off. When and where?

A minute later, he sends you the address and time.

It’s late morning when you text Zach that you’ve arrived at the beach. He heads to the parking lot, leaving his parents, sister, and daughter by the shoreline so that he can speak to you alone. He hates that he was too in shock to thank you last night. But it was all so much to take in.

He spots you pulling a bag out of your trunk, greeting you with a soft “hey” to not startle you. It’s so nice to know that you’re here because you want to be.

You turn to see Zach in his swim shorts, his hair wet, water droplets scattered atop his muscles. You close the trunk, hoping he didn’t catch the way your eyes lingered.

“Hey. What’d you tell Ella about the ‘work’ I had today?” you ask, trying to establish a lighthearted tone. “Did my boss let me leave early?”

“We can say that,” he says with a smile. “He sounds like a good guy.”

“He is. It’s my other boss that’s kind of a nightmare,” you joke.

Zach takes you in, squinting a bit.

“You don’t really think of me as your boss, do you?” he asks, realizing he hates the implication. It makes him feel like even thinking about you as more than a friend is deeply unethical. Like there’s a power imbalance and he’s taking advantage of it somehow.

You still for a moment.

“I mean, I don’t know,” you chuckle. “It doesn’t feel like it, but aren’t you?”

“I guess.” His brows furrow. “It just doesn’t sound right.”

“How about we say… Ella’s my boss? And yours, too, now that I think about it.”

Zach laughs, “That works for me.” He nervously crosses his arms. “Uh… before we go, I wanted to thank you for handling last night so well. I think you said exactly what she needed to hear.”

Your face drops slightly. Remembering the way Ella sounded when she told you her wish, resigned but hopeful, breaks your heart every time you think about it.

“Of course,” you say. It’s a relief that he’s not upset about anything you said. “Is she doing okay?”

“Oh, yeah. Being her usual self. I didn’t tell her you were coming, so she’ll be excited.” The way you smile at the idea of making her happy is something he’s grown to adore about you.

You make your way to the shoreline, and as expected, Ella squeals when she sees you, running straight for you. You crouch to hug her tightly, thrilled that you were invited today.

You sit on a line of towels with Zach and his parents and his sister while Ella explains to you what kind of sandcastle she wants to make. You make conversation with everyone over the soothing sounds of the waves crashing against the shore and eventually, you point out a small rubber ball by the cooler.

“You wanna play soccer?” you ask Ella.

“I’m not good at it,” she replies.

“You have the best coach right here,” you say, pointing to Zach. “Let’s give it a try. Maybe we can all work together to score a goal against your dad.”

Zach smiles in surprise when Ella actually agrees. You help him create a makeshift goal line with pebbles and shells as Ella kicks the ball over the sand with her grandparents and aunt. After you set up, you join Ella while Zach makes an exaggerated show of stretching.

“Is that how you always warm up?” you ask him.

“Is there something wrong with it?” he answers. Ella laughs as he dramatically stretches. By now, you can tell by the type of dad he is that he was always on the playful side.

Ella imitates his stretching, then determination flashes over her face and she darts forward to try to kick the ball past him without warning. Zach pretends to be too slow to react, reaching after the ball has already whizzed past him, and lets out a defeated groan.

He picks his daughter up as she jumps in victory, jokingly demanding she tell him when she got so good at soccer. You smile as you watch them share a moment of joy in the sun.

“Ella, would you ever want to go to one of your dad’s games?” you offer.

“Yeah!” she exclaims.

“Yeah?” Zach says. “Why don’t you say yeah whenever I ask?”

“Just take the win, Zach,” you say with a laugh. He grins, loving the way his name sounds when it comes from you.

You enjoy the rest of the afternoon, talking with Zach’s family, playing with Ella, catching glances at Zach when he’s not looking. They invite you to dinner, but you politely decline, figuring you should give them time alone. You thank them for the fun and go home feeling lighter than you did when you woke up.

That evening, as Connie helps Zach clean up after dinner, she mentions how good you are for Ella. He glances down at his mom as she hands him a rinsed plate to put in the dishwasher.

“She really is,” Zach agrees.

“I think she’s good for you, too,” she says with a hint of a smile.

“Real subtle, Mom,” he chuckles nervously. “It’s not like that.”

“Alright,” she says with an unconvinced tone. She takes a beat. “I just need to say–”

“Of course you do,” he mumbles with an amused smirk.

“–that I haven’t seen you this happy in a long time,” she speaks over him. “I haven’t seen you be you. But you are again, especially when she’s around. It’s just nice to see you smiling so much again. I know things have been tough for you.”

Zach’s teeth dig into his bottom lip. His mom is right; things have been tough, even before Jade left. He desperately wanted companionship, to at least come home to someone he could call a friend, but Jade couldn’t give him what he needed. He hasn’t felt full of life in a long time. Not until you knocked on his door.

“I’m better now,” he says.

Connie nods, sadness filling her features as she pulls Zach in for a side-hug.

“Hey, I’m alright,” he consoles her. “Don't worry about me.”

“You’re a parent. You should know the worrying never stops.” She pulls back. “So, you’re really going to deny it? I see the way you look at her.”

Zach shakes his head with an exaggerated scoff.

“You’re relentless,” he jokes.

“You used to tell me everything.”

“There’s nothing to tell.”

“Alright,” she sighs. “She looks at you the same way, you know.”

“Mom.”

Connie laughs and hands him another plate. He knows that the idea of you looking at him the way he looks at you won’t leave his mind any time soon.

(part two)

#so hard into my zach era like i literally can’t believe how much i wrote #zach maclaren and you #zach maclaren and y/n #zach maclaren and reader #zach maclaren x y/n #zach maclaren x you #zach maclaren x reader

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cheer-nympho · 11 hours ago

Text

Steve was always being brushed off when he asked people to read things aloud for him,

In middle school his assigned partner for their ‘Frankenstein’ project gave him a scornful glare and ignored him when he had asked them to read the passages aloud.

In his sophomore year, he’d turned to ask Robin Buckley to read a old newspaper article about the ‘Wild West’ to him, because he couldn’t make it out through the fonts and weird words. She had fixed him with a cold look but before she could respond, Tammy was tapping his shoulder offering her help.

Then, while studying with Nancy and Barb at lunch, Steve had asked for help reading study cards. His own study cards. The paper was too bright and the squiggles too squiggly. Both of them had looked at him, them each other, clearly trying to decide if it was a joke.

Barb had scoffed under Nancys pointed look and gone back to her own notes. And while Nancy hadn’t read them out for him, she had handed him her own notes on some nice blue and yellow cards. It took him a while, but he could read them. Maybe she thought he hadn’t wrote any.

After that, he went a long time without asking anyone to read him things. Turns out that once you graduate, reading isn’t much of an issue. He’d gotten by just fine by looking at his Archie comics and ignoring the swirling lines of articles surrounding them.

He didn’t need to ask again until Scoops Ahoy. For a cheap, overly themed ice cream parlour there sure was a whole lot of memorising and reading to be done. He couldn’t see the charts properly, couldn’t really make out the dates on the tubs in the freezer. But every time he asked Robin for help, her frown would deepen and deepen until she just snapped. It hadn’t been that mean, really. Just an annoyed yell followed by accusations of being lazy, her not understanding how he managed to graduate, one last comment of him being a ‘bumbling idiot’.

After the Russians, she never said anything like that to him again. And she always did the inventory and lists for him.

It takes until summer, 1987, for anyone to read aloud to Steve. They were laying across Eddie’s new bed in comfortable silence.

Steve had his legs dangling off the edges as Eddie leant back against him, legs pointing up against the wall in a way he swore was actually comfortable. He had been reading a new book called “Spellfire” and he couldn’t seem to put it down.

“Eddie?”

“Hm?”

“What’s your book about?”

“This? Well I…Not sure it’s really your thing, man.”

“Maybe.” He goes back to reading. “I could see if it’s my thing?”

Eddie twists his head sideways to look up at Steve with a slightly confused face. “You wanna borrow it?”

“Was thinking you could read it.” He fiddled with the pocket of his jeans in a hopefully casual and not freaking out way. He didn’t look at Eddie as he waited, but after a few moments he responded.

“Sure. That’s fine, yeah. Want me to start over or go from here?”

“From there is good.”

And it was good, it was really really good. Steve hadn’t been able to read a book since middle school, hadn’t really tried again after that. But as he lay back and let Eddie’s voice wash over him he couldn’t help feeling that he’d been missing out.

Sure, it actually wasn’t really his thing, but the way Eddie read aloud painted such a clear picture that Steve enjoyed it anyway. The other would change his voice slightly for different characters and added emotions into his speaking. If it was a tense moment, he’d go slow and add gaps in just the right places. If it was fast paced he’d speed up and get more and more manic until the action cut off. He felt like he was reading along. Felt like he could see the pages in the book, but also the characters and the dungeon they were combining through.

So, for the first time Steve hadn’t been brushed off. He had probably found the only person he knew who could turn reading a book into a performance. One he would happily be seated for every night.

From then on, new books turned up at the trailer every week, Steve not far behind.

#stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie #robin buckley #stobin #dyslexia #dyslexic steve harrington #fic #mini fic #writing #hcs #my writing

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boolger · 3 days ago

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A lapdog at a farm - chapter 5

<-former chapter -AO3 link -next chapter -> Call of duty. My ko-fi, Explicit, 18+, minors do not interact. read the tags. WC: 6.3k

tags: Rape/non-con elements, dub-con, dog!hybrid!people being kept as pets, alternative universe - farm, dark, farmer!John Price, working-dogs, punishments, mating cycles/rut/heat (no omegaverse), the dove isn't dead but its dying, it dies later on, reader is a brat, knotting, animal tails and ears, mentions of trauma, violence, angst, hurt/comfort, collars, rough sex, breeding kink, biting, threesome, foursome, everyone is fucking your honor, enemies to lovers, chubby reader, reader has a pussy

MDNI. MDNI. Dead dove do not eat.

Authors note: do note there will be the use of prong collars in this. Just like all the other fucked up stuff in this, i don't support that irl, but this is fiction. On a different note, it will probably be at least a week before I can give you another chapter lol, shit is happening, my sinners and im holding on. Also thank u to all the nice asks and comments ive been sent. means a lot <33. ENJOY!

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You could only stay in the farmhouse for so long; even though you desperately wanted to stay inside, Price dragged you outside, talking about fresh air and enjoying nature.

To you it was nothing but lies and the smell of animal shit.

There were no pavements, no cars flashing by, no advertisements or shops, no scents of food or sweets trying to lure you in. There were no hybrid clothes shops, where John would play dress up with you for his next party. Show him how the lingerie set he picked out looked against your tail.

He would make sure your nails were always perfect and manicured. Without the claws, he made sure you knew you were loved anyways, your nails adorned with expensive nail polish and gemstones. Anything that his Daisy, his princess, his darling, his puppy wanted, she always got.

Now you were here, following him into the stables, to see how far Nikolai - who had forced himself into your life - was with the tractor.

Warily looking out for the hybrids, staying close to your owner.

The stitches were gone and everything was healed all nicely - that didn’t mean that you wanted to start over and get more bites that would need stitches. Once was enough. Hopefully Price and Nikolai understood that too.

Also, you didn’t want to get fucked dumb by those mutts again; they didn’t deserve your pussy. Especially not Ghost or Gaz. Not really Soap either, he had just been nice because he had to. You were sure. They were nothing but stupid working dogs, who didn’t know how to behave.

Your owner, John Price, looked in love; he was watching Nik just as much as he was watching the tractor. The stress that had sometimes followed him home when you lived in the city was no longer visible. It had left his bones, made him happy and pliable, clearly blossoming in his new role as a farmer. You loved him but what the fuck were you supposed to do with this whole situation? Pretend to be happy?

You were a pet, so it wasn’t like you had any options. And your attempts at persuading him to move back to the city hadn’t gone well. Resisting your ever present urge to let him fuck you, would probably not do you any good. Earn you a spanking from both him and Nikolai. They might even throw you to the hounds.

One of those said hounds were getting closer to you, the hybrid making you tense up a little.

“You’re looking good, princess,” Gaz said casually, shooting you an awfully charming smile, his tail wagging while you tipped your ears backwards instead of replying.

“Feeling better?”

You didn’t reply, merely stared at the tractor, boring as it was. Maybe if you ignored him, he would go away. He stepped closer to you, his dark gaze resting on you, while you stepped closer to John, growling as a warning.

“Behave,” Price said over his shoulder, clearly more interested in that Russian man of his, than your safety.

It only took another step and Gaz’s teeth a tad too close to you, to send you bolting out. Back inside it was then, you concluded, enough farming bullshit for today.

Only to meet Ghost in the way, his scarred face grinning smugly, ears tipping towards you.

“‘Ello pup.”

Nah, you weren’t fucking with that today. You managed to see the shadow of Soap before you bolted again.

Running still wasn’t your best talent; so though you knew it was stupid, you decided to do what you weren’t allowed to anyways. You crawled the wooden fence, ignoring the male hybrids' shouts and barks — as well as the fence’s slight squeak - and landed on the other side with a grunt.

The corns were tall and you took a breath, looking over your shoulder, only to see a worried looking Soap being the closest.

He let out a concerned whimper.

“Dinnae lass,” he warned, a softness in his voice that you recognized from your moments inside.

You would deal with the consequences and the punishment that Price would give you for leaving the ground. It was better than getting your shoulders bitten to pieces - so you got up and rushed into the tall corn field. Abandoning the male hybrids.

Stupid. They were all stupid.

Maybe this should be your new go-to hiding spot. You could hear them bark aggressively but not getting nearer. They weren’t allowed to leave either. You felt your chest swell a little with pride over the idea. You wouldn't be gone for long, just until they lost interest in you.

It was several seconds before you stopped, panting with your tongue out. You couldn’t see the fence or the farm from all the corn by now, which finally meant some peace. Your tail wagged and your body relaxed, a soft wind playing with your fur for a moment, making the corn move around you, like waves in the ocean.

However, that peace didn’t last long.

“My my,” the voice almost appeared out of nowhere and you turned slowly, unsure but still afraid of what you would see, “what are you doing here, perrita? On my property?”

You knew Alejandro and Rodolfo had gotten a hybrid, but you had been too swept up in your own nightmare to ask about her; now, as she towered above you, seeming more wolf than dog, you would rather have one of the mutts on your own farm. A scared little whimper escaped you.

“You must be Price’s precious lapdog, no?” She asked, slowly moving in between the corn with ease, as she circled around you, fear making you stay still, “a little city puppy, forced to be out on a farm. How sad.”

There was no trace of sympathy in her voice. It took you a moment to swallow some spit and another moment to take a proper breath.

“I’ll go home again, I’m sorry.” You tried your best to seem submissive, leaning forward a little, tail tugged along your leg. You at least had your owner at the farm - but here? Here, with this new, wolf-like hybrid, you didn't have anyone. You weren’t even supposed to be here, weren’t allowed. Sure, you knew Alejandro and Rudy, but they also knew you weren’t supposed to be there.

“Hmmm,” she answered in a rumble, licking her teeth slowly, casually showing off her fangs, “what’s your name, perrita?”

She screamed danger. Her energy screamed ‘I can make worse wounds than them’ and you certainly didn’t feel like testing that. In fact, you would rather get as much distance between you and her as possible.

“D-Daisy.” It was the name Price had chosen, not that you were really called it. But you weren’t going to tell this hybrid woman who looked like she could swallow you whole, that you were usually called princess, pretty girl, puppy or sweetheart.

“I’m Valeria,” she replied, finally stopping her circling, only to step closer to you. She wasn’t really that tall, but her energy was as if she was, she had strong arms and legs; scars littered her too, her hair short, ears big and tipped forward without a care in the world. Her collar was thick and sturdy, opposed to your own fancy one.

You almost wanted to point out that yours was prettier. That you were a lapdog, not one of the working ones, that you were not made to be played rough with. That you were no threat.

You could hear barking in the distance. Voices calling out for you. Even though you hadn’t met Valeria for more than a minute, you already knew you wanted to get a good distance between you and her.

“Uh nice to meet you, but I better get back home, sorry-“ you turned around quickly but before you could even think to bolt, strong arms were around you and the other dog hybrid pulled you close to her chest.

“Eres tan linda e ingenua,” she almost lovingly growled into your ear, and while you didn’t understand what she was saying, you were much more distracted by her tongue. She licked your cheek a couple of times, slow and wet strokes; you got the feeling that she might eat you raw without regret and you twisted a little in her grip, letting out a louder growl. She laughed, one of her hands pawing at your tit, claws sinking into the fabric. She smelled of danger and lust; like the mutts at home when they first got their dirty paws on you.

“I’m gonna enjoy me—“

“VALERIA!” Her name echoed through the fields, making both of you freeze. Like a warning rushing in between the corns, her name couldn’t be ignored.

She growled deeply, seeming annoyed with the disturbance, while you wanted to kiss whoever of your neighbors it was. She rolled her hips, humping your ass twice, before she was interrupted again.

“Valeria!” It was Alejandro, you realised then, who yelled once again, “ sé que la tienes! Let her go!”

With one deep sniff of you, while you whimpered, the wolf-looking hybrid finally let go of you.

“I won’t be as nice next time, perrita - now go, before I change my mind and take you from your boys.”

You didn’t need to be told that again and didn’t want to argue that they weren’t your boys - the moment she let go, you bolted towards the way you came.

How they knew that she had gotten a hold of you wasn't clear, but it wasn’t like you were gonna turn around and ask Alejandro or Rudy.

The answer came to you anyways; one angry looking John Price stood with crossed arms, phone in hand. A grinning Nikolai next to him and three growling hybrids moving back and forth along the men and the fence. Every single one of them stilled and stared at you as you sheepishly walked to the fence, tail between your legs and ears tipped down.

You stood, just for a moment, with the fence in between you and the others. Considering staying there, as if that would be a good solution.

“Get your arse over here,” Price snapped, his voice stern and dark, as he put his phone in his pocket, marching towards you.

You hastily and in a rather inexperienced manner, climbed the fence and got to the right side. Instantly, tears welled up in your eyes and you let out a whimper, almost ready to tell about the horrors you had just been through - only to bark loudly at the hybrids as they all charged towards you, hands touching you, only stopped by a sharp whistle.

“Nyet,” Nikolai called harshly, “off her. Now.”

Soap and Gaz instantly let go, stepping back as John reached you, but Ghost didn’t move. His hand rested on your neck, pressing your collar against your skin, his nose almost fully pressed against your temple.

“Let go.” Price’s voice was sharp and you let out a little whimper- not sure who of them you would rather deal with right now.

“She smells wrong,” Ghost replied, not moving, but his voice not as harsh as it could be, “smell of her.”

Her. You didn’t know whether Valeria would be in trouble over this or not. You had been the one to step into her territory anyways. She wasn't the one who had jumped a fence after all.

“We will fix that.”

Ghost let out a grumble but after two seconds of staring at each other, the hybrid finally let go of you, earning himself a swift “Good boy.”

Then Price grabbed into the ring in your collar and pulled, ignoring how you instantly broke into tears, excuses and explanations spilling from your lips like a waterfall, desperate to avoid punishment. You didn't want to stay with Valeria, but you didn’t want this either.

You were dragged past Nikolai who shared a short glance with Price - and they gave each other a short nod.

“C’mon boys,” Nikolai then called, the hybrids instantly moving to him, even though you could feel them staring at you, “we’re gonna join them.”

They were what? You cried harder, tugging at John’s arm, your owner ignoring your pleads and cries.

“I’m sorry sir, I got scared, I didn’t mean to run away,” you babbled, every second word followed by a small sob or whine, tail between your lets, almost making it hard to walk normally, “ they scared me, I was gonna come back, I’ll be good sir, I’ll behave! I wasn’t running away!”

There was no mercy from your owner, who just marched you towards the farmhouse that had almost become home by now.

If someone had told you a year ago that you would be a dog on a farm by now, surrounded by working hybrids, you would have laughed in their face. Loudly and impolitely.

You? Pretty lapdog living in the city out on a farm?

You weren’t even at the house yet, somehow crying harder because you felt so sorry for yourself in general. You were such a perfect lapdog, such a perfect being, forced to be out here, in the cold countryside. A tragedy.

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The prong collars looked like they would choke too and you wanted to scream merely at the sight.

“I’m not running the risk of having my darling all bitten to pieces again - this will hopefully help you to remember.”

None of them seemed too happy about it; you couldn’t blame them, you wouldn’t want those either, but you were horrified by the idea of getting bitten as harshly as they did last time. If both Price and Nik hadn’t been there, you doubted it would be possible to get the collars on them.

You were still crying yourself, from the shame of having jumped over the fence and creating chaos, only resulting in this.

The moment they were allowed, they were on you, ignoring your whimpering and fingers trying to push them off - Soap was the nicest, helping you get your clothes off instead of letting the others rip them, even if all of them were obsessed with your smell. Or well, with how you smelled of Valeria to be exact.

Soap licked your cheek and you growled at him, tipping your ears back, trying to push him away, fingers against his chest; but he didn’t move, only pressed himself closer, growling back to prove he was stronger than you - that you were supposed to be submitting to him.

“They shouldn’t be this aggressive,” you heard Price point out to Nikolai, but you were too distracted by Soap grinding his still clothed crotch against your poor, exposed cunt - you whined his name, but he didn’t stop.

“Gonn’ mark ye, hen,” he promised in a murmur, teeth sinking into your jaw for just a moment - a warning tug in the leash made him let go almost instantly, instead licking the spot a couple of times, “gonn’ make ye smell all bonnie again.”

Both Gaz and Ghost were barking, but they were both held by the collars by Price and Nik, kneeling next to them, clearly antsy.

“-are working dogs-” it was hard to hear them, over your own mind buzzing so much, over the barks and the pleasure that you hated, “-hierachy is importa-”, one of Soap’s hands disappeared and a moment later, you heard his fly get tugged down, “show them where the line is, so–”

You howled in a high pitched tone as he forced his cock inside you, making you twist and try to push Soap okay. The stretch was intense, burning despite how wet you felt. “It's okay, bonnie lass,” Soap growled, forcing his cock a little deeper into you, nosing at your shoulder, near one of your scent glands, his hands moving to grab onto your thighs, “we’re nae gonna hurt ye.”

You both knew it was a lie - but you at least trusted Soap a little more than the two other mutts who were watching, knowing he could control himself. They were barely able to sit still, tongues out, almost drooling, while their eyes were dark in a way that reminded you of that time in the shed.

He forced his cock deeper, the knot finally reaching the opening of your poor, stretched cunt and you let out a sound at the fear of it sliding inside you. The scent of Soap was already beginning to overwhelm the scent that Valeria had left behind against your will - a part of you wished you had fought her more, had attempted to hurt her more.

The cry that left you was pained and afraid - his fangs almost having forced its way through your skin; you were only saved by John, who pulled Soap back by the collar, the prongs digging into the hybrid’s skin.

“Behave, boy,” John snarled while a mixture of a whine and a growl left Soap, as he helplessly pawed at the collar, “No breaking skin - already told you.”

“‘m sorry, sorry,” he promised, a pained tone to his voice, “dinnae mean tae.”

You doubted it was true; there was a darkness in the air despite the way your owner tried handling them.

He was let go off and the moment the prongs didn’t painfully dig into his skin, he was on you again, tongue on the indent he had left, his cock pressed into you again, his tail wagging.

“‘m sorry,” he barely managed to say in between his licks and moans, before his hands were back on you, his moaning louder, as he ignored your whines of slowing down. Your own hands grabbed onto his mohawk and ears, but the hybrid did nothing but moan even louder, moving his hips a little upwards and fuck - he hit the perfect spot, grinning like a feral hound when he noticed and heard your sounds.

You came against your will, crying out and spasming around him, his hands grabbing harder onto your thighs, claws teasing the skin.

He was panting and moaning like a hound, mounting you like there was nothing in his mind but the feeling of your cunt.

“Gonna fill ye up,” Soap promised, words barely escaping his mouth, drool dripping down on you; not like you cared, too gone yourself to really do so.

“DON'T knot her,” Price’s word cut through the air like a sharp knife, slicing into your mind; you wanted him to knot you, a part of you realized, no you needed him too - while another screamed in delight of not having to be stuck to him.

“Nnngh,” his hips were going so fast it almost hurt as they clashed against your skin, “please sir, please plea—“

“No.”

The hand that appeared made you shudder - and then a second later, Soap came, almost a guttural scream leaving him; you could feel Price’s fingers near your cock, stopping him from sliding his knot into you.

“Later,” Price answered, then pulling Soap back by the collar and hair, your own hands slipping easily from him, “we don’t have the time to wait for all of you to knot her right now.”

The moment he was pulled away, you moved, whimpering and curling to the side, wincing as cum slid out from your pussy; it wasn’t John’s, you wanted it to be your owners. You barely had time to breathe before Nik released one of the others. Gaz pushed you onto your stomach - one hand on your neck to keep you down as you snarled.

“Wait,” you barked, ears tipping down “lemme breathe, for fucks sake—“

“Need you, puppy,” Gaz merely replied, grabbing onto your collar and tugging, his other hand pulling on your tail, ignoring your yelp, “gonna make it all okay again.”

“Nothing happened-“ you snarled, trying to make him let go, but you separately rose to your knees in order to levitate the pressure on your tail.

“Why did you smell like her then, huh?” He all but snarled, finally letting go of your collar, to push down his own pants, “stinking of her lust!”

You tried twisting to grip onto his ears to tug at them, hoping it would make him let go of you but he merely let go of you fully for a moment - your wrists were caught by his hands and he slammed them against the wooden floor.

“Be nice, собака,” Nik warned him, “I’m in no mood for broken bones.”

You barely heard him nor Gaz’ aggressive reply; you were too busy, having a realization.

They were jealous ; you weren’t sure why it had taken you so fucking long to realize. The three mutts were jealous somebody else, somebody they didn’t know, had touched you and hadn’t you been so fucking upset, you might have laughed.

Instead, you felt a cock forcing its way into your cunt, making you howl in pleasure against your will; the slide was easier this time as Gaz fucked you, as you were already wet from the round with Soap - and now with his cum as well, Gaz fucked you almost smoothly. If not more aggressively than Soap had.

It didn’t take long before his teeth sank into your skin, the first two seconds it was nothing more than an extra grip, his cock roughly thrusting into you as if attempting to move your organs, his drool sliding along your skin, mixing with your sweat. His claws were digging into your skin slightly, but even more into the floor - while you were a mess, panting and attempting to growl in between your pathetic moans, barely able to see straight.

The pressure he bit you with changed quickly however and suddenly you were whining in pain, so loudly that you almost didn’t recognize your own voice.

Apparently Gaz had tried to bite Price in aggression over being ripped away from ‘his bitch’ as Nik called it, and you heard the harsh words and slaps, while you sank down a little, your tits pressed against the cold floor, your cunt empty.

He was back as soon as he disappeared though, pulling you up again, only to almost instantly try to bite you again – halfway pulled away once more. You looked over your shoulder, seeing how the prong collar dug into his skin for a short moment until Price let go of him again.

The moment he was back, you turned however, using the moment to grab onto one of his long, dark ears and tug; it was almost a squeal that left Gaz and you heard both the hybrids bark and growl, Nik saying something – but it was the harsh spank from the leather leash that made you loosen your grip.

“Behave, Princess,” John was squatting down next to you, strong hand on your pretty collar; it stood out so violently when compared to the others’ current prong collars, “or I’ll get you a collar too.”

“They’re mean!” you whimpered, giving him your best puppy eyes, before sending Gaz an angry look, as he was barely held back by John.

“Well you’re not quite playing nice either, eh?” There was a slight amusement in his voice but you didn’t get to comment on it, before he moved again.

Price gave Gaz more leash and the hybrid was instantly on you again, but this time Price didn’t let go of the metal ring in your own collar, keeping you in place, as if to remind you to behave; to remember he was right here, calling the shots.

“Yeah, Princess,” Gaz mocked, pushing into your cunt again with a moan, the movement in his hips exposing the fact that he was wagging his tail, “Behave.”

“Shut up!” you hissed angrily, a tug in the collar reminding you that Price was right there.

Gaz’ hands were mostly on your hips - he nuzzled against your back and neck, licking your shoulders and in between your shoulder blades - he bit you a couple of times, but they were barely anything more than nips, a gentle tug on his collar reminding him to behave.

Then one of his hands moved, almost catching you off guard and making you whimper - it slid beneath your stomach, pawing at it for a moment, before it found its way to your cunt where the two of you were still connected, his thrusts still hard; he touched your clit without hesitation, snarling out words you could barely recognize. Mercilessly forcing you towards another orgasm.

Price let go of your collar and you let your head slumber down against the floor, wincing at the small pool of drool that had been created, hating how you pushed back against Gaz, the dual pleasure of his cock hitting that right spot and the fingers on your clit, so good you could barely breathe.

You barely heard Price’s command of not knotting you, from the mere tsunami of pleasure that overtook your body as you came, a howl that barely made any sound, snapping of your teeth and the pawing at the floor. You tightened around his cock, the knot having been so close, oh so close to being forced into your over oversensitive cunt - but then it was pulled out of you, almost making you sob.

Cum spurted on top of your lower back and ass cheeks, before Gaz willingly went - you could hear the almost instant sound of him and Soap making out with each other. And there was only one person back, which meant you had to go now.

A hand grabbed onto your ankle, dragging you backwards as you managed to crawl forwards a few steps - you turned around, back on the floor, raising your opposite leg to kick Ghost in the face, but the other hybrid caught it easily; grinning at you, almost feral-like, lust heavy in the air. Sometimes you forgot they had been in the military for so long.

Leather connected to your skin once more, this time on your raised thigh, a whine leaving you, your eyes flickering to look up at John who stood with the leash curled in his hand, ready to spank you with it once more.

“behave,” John hissed at you, while Ghost chuckled. Idiot.

You didn’t have much time to argue, Ghost letting go of your ankles, just to grab onto your thighs and pull you closer; he was kneeling, almost pulling you into his lap, that feral grin still there, fangs exposed.

He leant over you much quicker than you had anticipated, ignoring your growling and snapping with teeth - one hand resting next to your head, the other pulling down his boxers, pants already open.

Was his cock this big last time? It was like you couldn’t remember the last time right now, you could barely think, in fact, your mind was overwhelmed with so many things. Pleasure, oversensitivity, pain and anger - his dick seemed inhumanely long.

“Not so snappy now, huh?” he crooned, voice low, his free hand grabbing onto your plush thigh, fingers digging into the fat, ears tipped towards you as he spoke, “cockdumb already?”

“nnngh,” you tried pushing at his clothed chest, twisting in his grip, but it was no use; it was like the cock inside you kept you from doing anything. Somehow you managed a small “shutup” and that was enough to set Ghost going.

“Gonna teach you to not go whoring again,” Ghost snarled against your skin, tongue sloppily leaving a wet trail of spit over one of your bouncing tits, simply ignoring your hands trying to push his face out of the way, a plethora of moans and small yaps leaving you as he didn’t stop fucking you with that monster cock of his. You knew you were being watched, both by your owner and his boyfriend, as well as the two other hybrids, it only added to the humiliation of being turned on.

“Belong to us,” his words were barely audible as he growled them, the wet sounds and rustling of his clothes seeming to overtake it, “not her.”

“I won’t, won’t go, won–” you were barely aware of the words slipping from your lips, the volume rising as you felt his teeth scrape against a spot on your shoulder over your right breast, “nonon, please, I wont–”

“Ghost–” Price’s warning was stern, the little tug in the prong collar making him grumble, licking over the spot a couple of times - your eyes met.

Ghost’s eyes almost seemed like they wanted to own you too; as if it was no longer John who you bowed to, but the pack that you didn’t want, on a farm you didn’t want to be. His thrusts quickened and then his eyelids lowered together with his head – biting down into your skin.

Despite his fast attempt at breaking your skin, mauling your flesh into his, Price was quicker – pulling him back by the collar. He held an extra grip on his hair and you managed to look up, see through the tears.

It was like there was a flood in your ears, Price looking mad, Ghost’s ears tipping backwards as he spoke.

Fighting to get some air into your lungs, you panted and tried wiggling free. Ghost’s fingers merely dug deeper into your plush thigh even though he was currently pulled back by the prong collar, the tips of his claws pressing against your skin as a warning.

The moment he let go, Ghost was back at it, staring down at you with a dark smile, grunts and small moans even leaving him. It took a couple of moments before Price let him have enough leash to bend down over you again and this time Ghost growled into your ears instead of your skin. Licking your furry ears while you whimpered at the feeling and the words.

They owned you; were going to breed you, use you, keep Valeria away, and do whatever they needed to keep you. You were theirs. The moment you let us, he had panted, we will love you.

There was an odd feeling in your stomach, almost as if you were going to piss yourself, but with no mercy from any of the men, one of your hands dug into his short hair and the other grabbed onto his shoulder as you screamed.

It had been a while since you squirted and it took you by surprise, just as it did the others. There were several barks, voices but then Ghost was fucking you even harder than before, bordering on painful, forcing his mouth against yours. You came a second time, this time not squirting but it almost felt more intense.

Ghost came just a moment later, perhaps caught by surprise himself, but he made sure not to knot you.

The world was spinning around you. There were teardrops in your lashes as you squinted up at the hybrid, who was still pushed inside you. Price’s hand petting him shortly on the head before pulling him back.

There was speech but you barely noticed - then strong hands pulled you up into a lap. The overpowering scent of leather and oil told you who it was and despite your slight hate for Nik, your tail wagged as he pulled you into his arms, cooing at you.

“Such a strong puppy,” he praised, one of his hands drying away some of your drool, caressing your cheek as he sat on the floor with you on his lap, cum no doubt dripping onto his clothes, “you deserve treat for being so good, da?”

Compared to the first time you had met Nikolai, you didn’t want to bite his hand anymore - he clearly didn’t fear you doing so either. You snuggled into his hand, nodding as you squinted up at him, a small “uh-huh” leaving you.

His hand disappeared and then there was a faint rustling of plastic - even without seeing it, you smelled it. It was that mouthwatering scent that made you weak in your knees that first time and your nose instantly sniffed, almost trying to sit up further to get a look of where it was - to get it before the boys did. Nikolai laughed, letting out a “there you go, milaya,” letting you grab the piece of jerky from his finger, instantly sinking your teeth into it with a pleased sigh. Your tail wagging a little again as you heard Soap whining over not getting a piece.

You even had to take a bath with them afterwards. Your life was officially over - you made sure to tell Price that, who just huffed and rolled his eyes. Sure, you weren’t the biggest fan of showers, but you wanted the cum off and you wanted a bath in the tub… alone. That was your thing.

“- ‘nd they’re gonna use up my shampoo and my conditioner -” you continued overdramatically as Nik carried you in front of John, the russian man merely snorting at your pitiful complaining.

“We’ll buy more-” John tried to point out, but to no avail, life might as well be over for you right now.

“- ‘nd my brushes - all my nice brushes!”

“I will be sure tae use yers, Mo ghràdh,” Soap happily proclaimed, sending you a wink, fully naked as he was, his usual collar back on, small red marks on his neck from where the prongs had been, “I will use theim the wrong way. Just fer ye.”

Gaz snickered and even Ghost let out a chuckle.

“Jooohn,” you whined, only struggling a little as Nik sat you down in the tub, the water already nice and warm, your poor body having needed this, “I’m gonna need new brushes.”

“I doubt that, Princess,” he cooed, petting your hair, “Now who wants to join in th–”

Soap was in the tub, sliding in behind you before John could even finish his question, happily ignoring your pout and growl.

“Dinnae be like that,” he crooned, “where is yer special shampoo?”

This day had been awful.

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

“Princess.”

You almost jumped as the voice called for you and you turned, squinting slightly in suspicion at the sight. Gaz stood in the doorway, all calmly, looking at you, playing a little with his gloves. He didn’t look aggressive and didn’t smell turned on; in fact, he looked pretty harmless, his tail wagging ever so slightly, ears turning towards you and an almost shy smile.

“What?” you asked, sitting up in the dog bed, crossing your arms, not caring about sounding nice, looking him over for a moment before adding, “you’re dragging in mud.”

He looked down at his shoes, letting out a little ‘oh’. They weren’t really supposed to be in here, so you didn’t really understand why Gaz stood there. You didn’t really care either.

The other might be beautiful, but he was still not one of your favorite people.

“I - want to show you something,” he finally said, one of his charming smile appearing, though it was a little more careful this time, “Soap said you would probably like it.”

“What is it?” You didn’t sound too impressed.

“It's a surprise,” he smiled a little more.

“If it's your knots, then you can–”

“Jeez,” he rolled his eyes, as if they weren’t fucking you silly on the livingroom floor the other day, “it’s not. Nothing like that.”

“Promise?”

“I do,” he answered, wagging a little more than before, “Swear on my tail.”

"Hm. Where is it?”

“In the barn.”

You scrunched your nose at the mention of the barn, the idea of being stamped to death by a horse already scaring you.

“It’s nothing scary - I wouldn’t bring you if it was.”

You let out a sigh, before getting up - he went to the hallway again and you followed, stealing one of John’s jackets as well as a pair of his boots, before following Gaz outside.

“Some air would do you good once in a while, ya’ know,” Gaz said after a few moments, “we’re not that bad all of the time, Princess.”

You huffed, wondering for a moment if you should just turn around and go back. “You haven’t really proved me otherwise.”

He let out a hum that almost sounded agreeable but opened one of the doors to the barn, ushering you inside.

“It’s all good, I promise,” he said once more and you reminded yourself, that if he tricked you, you were going to snap off his tail. Pretty as it was.

He steered you to a booth where you noticed the heat lamp at first, more than anything else - but then you saw them, letting out a little gasp.

Tiny baby goats, all snuggled together in the hay beneath the lamp. A few of the mothers stood nearby and one of them came to the door of the booth, sniffing at Gaz’ hand, before letting out a bleat - then turning around again.

“They’re adorable,” you whispered, looking back at the babies, some of them looking at you, others sleeping with no worries in the world.

“Aren’t they?” Gaz asked with a smile, “They were born yesterday night. Come.”

You let out a scared sound as Gaz opened the door to the booth.

“Won’t the mothers attack us?” you didn’t like how Gaz chuckled to your genuine, fearful question but he shook his head.

“Nah, me ‘nd the others hang out with the animals all the time.” He explained, petting one of the mothers who came to greet him for a moment.

It was cute. You had to admit that, even with your limited love of the farm animals.

“But I don’t.” you pointed out, still standing in the door of the booth, afraid to step into the hay and join the other as he sat down next to the baby goats.

“No, but the mothers know I won’t let a predator near,” he explained gently, “Not at daytime and not during the night.”

“Oh.”

There was something special over this that you could not explain. You didn’t want to explain it. You sat down next to Gaz as he patted the spot, still a little unsure about the momma goats - but none of them battered an eye as Gaz took your hand and made you gently pet one of the babies.

“They’re so tiny,” you whispered, almost to yourself, for once not hating or fearing Gaz. At least for right now, you were just in a moment together with him, doing something that you hadn’t expected would be that nice.

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latenightreadingpdf · 3 days ago

Text

Beneath the Moonlight - Remus Lupin

₊‧⁺˖⋆ Masterlist ⋆˖⁺‧₊

Summary: In the days leading up to a full moon, Remus Lupin receives an anonymous gift basket filled with potions, chocolates, and a carefully-brewed Wolfsbane Potion.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

Y/N considered herself a rather observant student, especially when it came to the Marauders. It was hard not to notice them, really. They were practically a four-person parade through the halls of Hogwarts—pranks, laughter, and charm trailing behind them like a comet's tail. James Potter with his messy hair and endless attempts to impress Lily Evans, Sirius Black with his dazzling grin and effortless cool, Peter Pettigrew following close, always eager to please. But one Marauder stood out to her more than the rest. Remus Lupin.

There was something about him that had Y/N hooked from the beginning. Perhaps it was his quiet brilliance or the way he seemed to carry a world of mysteries in those warm, honey-colored eyes. Or maybe, it was the way new scars seemed to appear on his face and hands every so often, faint but unmistakable. They fascinated her, those scars, and as her gaze lingered on him in class or at meals, she found herself trying to figure him out.

And, admittedly, somewhere along the way, Y/N developed a bit of a crush on him. But who wouldn’t? He was brilliant, always top of the class without trying too hard, and—and yes, he was gorgeous. Handsome in that annoyingly effortless way. Soft, tousled hair that practically begged to be touched, sharp cheekbones, and—Merlin, those knit jumpers that always made him look so adorable. How was that fair? It was like he’d been sculpted by some benevolent god of tall, bookish, sweater-loving dream boys.

But Y/N’s interest in him was more than just attraction. There was something… otherworldly about him. She’d started to notice patterns—how he would seem worn and pale every few weeks, how he would disappear entirely from school grounds for a day or two, only to return looking exhausted and, if possible, even more scarred than before.

A month ago, after endless speculation and careful observation, Y/N had arrived at a conclusion: Remus Lupin was probably a werewolf. She wasn’t completely certain; it was more of an educated guess. But what could she do with this theory? It wasn’t like she could walk up to him and blurt out, “Hey, Remus! You don’t know me, but I’ve been watching you for months, and I just wanted to ask, are you, by any chance, a werewolf?”

The thought alone made her cringe. Y/N sighed, tapping her quill against her parchment. Remus Lupin might be full of mysteries and maybe—just maybe—she’d get the courage to actually talk to him someday.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

The full moon was only a few days away, and Y/N could already see the toll it was taking on Remus. He was limping slightly, a stiffness in his stride that made her heart ache, and the dark circles under his eyes were more prominent than ever. He looked exhausted, like he hadn’t been sleeping in days, and though she knew he had his friends—the Marauders, always fiercely loyal—she couldn’t help but feel he needed more comfort than they could provide. She wanted to do something for him, something small but meaningful.

The idea hit her while she was rummaging through her bag in the library: an anonymous get-well-soon basket. She could leave it outside his dorm, a collection of little comforts to ease the days leading up to his transformation. She’d make sure it was subtle, not too personal, just enough to lift his spirits without drawing attention.

Excitement and nerves mixed in her stomach as she mentally listed what she’d need. A couple potions to help with sleep, pain, and anxiety, some of Honeydukes' finest chocolate, a soft blanket to keep him warm, and a few baked goods from the kitchen elves. She might even add a small note with a simple message—“Hope these bring you a bit of comfort during the full moon. Take care of yourself.”

Over the next couple of days, Y/N carefully gathered everything. She bought him a midnight-blue wool blanket that felt like a hug in fabric form and a variety of different chocolates. She used her advanced potion skills to make Murtlap Essence, a Calming Draught, and a Healing Potion.

But the most important addition was a small bottle of Wolfsbane Potion. She’d somehow managed to get her hands on the recipe, even though it wasn’t officially taught at Hogwarts—and she’d acquired a secret stash of the rare ingredients needed to brew it, though she'd never admit where from. It had taken several nights of brewing in the abandoned classroom she’d found, but she’d done it.

The full moon was only two days away when she finished assembling the basket, carefully placing the note on top before leaving it right outside the boys' dormitory. With a final glance over her handiwork, she quickly walked back to her dorm, satisfied with her work.

As she returned to her room, a little thrill of satisfaction bubbled within her. Maybe, just maybe, her small gesture would help Remus feel a little less alone, a little less burdened by the full moon’s approach. And that thought alone was enough to fill her with quiet joy.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

Just a few floors below, the Marauders were still lounging in the Gryffindor common room, sprawled across chairs and couches as the fire crackled low. They’d spent hours discussing pranks, arguing about the latest Quidditch match, and bickering about everything from Potions homework to the best way to dodge Filch. When the last embers started to die, they finally decided it was time to call it a night.

As they made their way up the stairs, it was James who first spotted the basket. He froze mid-step, eyebrows raised as he pointed it out. "Er, lads... anyone know what this is?"

The other boys crowded around, peering down at the unexpected sight.

“No clue,” Peter murmured, squinting at the note resting on top.

Sirius, with his usual curiosity, leaned down and plucked up the note, inspecting it with a grin before his eyes gleamed mischievously. “Ooooooh, Remus, it’s for you!” he cooed, reading the note aloud for the group: ‘Hope these bring you a bit of comfort during the full moon. Take care of yourself.’

The boys’ faces all fell at once. Whoever had left this knew. Someone had figured it out. Their carefully crafted excuses, the timing of their sneaking around, all the little tricks they’d come up with—they thought it was foolproof. But apparently, someone had been watching more closely than they’d realized.

Without another word, they grabbed the basket, exchanging uneasy glances as they rushed into the dormitory, shutting the door firmly behind them. They gathered around Remus’s bed, where James set the basket down, and just stared at it.

“Well? Open it already!” James urged, his voice a mix of curiosity, excitement, and a tinge of concern.

Remus took a steadying breath. His friends were watching him closely as he slowly lifted the wrapping, half-expecting some kind of prank to burst out at him. But instead, he found an assortment of thoughtful items neatly arranged within the basket. A stack of Honeydukes chocolates, carefully tied together with string. A blanket, dark blue and soft, lay folded at the side. Several small bottles—potions, each labeled with precision, sat in the center, cushioned by tissue paper.

They all scanned the contents in awe and curiosity, but Sirius was the first to notice something unusual. He gasped, eyes widening as he pointed to one particular bottle.

“Holy shit, is that—”

“Wolfsbane,” Remus finished quietly, staring at the vial with a mixture of shock and disbelief.

They all fell silent, taking in the implications of that single bottle. Wolfsbane Potion was incredibly complex, nearly impossible for a student to brew, and yet here it was—crafted, sealed, and ready for him. Someone had not only figured out his secret but had gone to lengths far beyond casual concern. The potion’s presence in the basket hinted at more than just kindness; it was a deeply personal gesture, an unspoken understanding that spoke volumes.

Remus swallowed hard, his fingers brushing the cool glass of the bottle. "Did the card say who it was from?" he asked, looking over at Sirius, who shrugged and handed him the note again.

Remus read the short message over and over, searching for any hidden clues, some hint that might give away the sender. But the note was short, simple, and entirely anonymous. He turned it over, checked for invisible ink, even held it up to the light, but there was nothing.

“Not a single hint?” James murmured, peering over his shoulder, a frown deepening across his face. “Nothing?”

The group exchanged baffled glances. They examined the basket once more, handling each item carefully to make sure nothing seemed dangerous. The potions were labeled clearly and accurately, the chocolate smelled rich and sweet, and the blanket was incredibly soft—perfect for a night when he’d be feeling cold and drained. Every item seemed genuine, carefully chosen, with not a hint of a prank or hex.

As they finished examining the basket, they slowly started getting ready for bed. Remus sat quietly on his bed, his mind racing as he took in the kindness of it all. He tucked the potions into his bedside drawer, hiding the chocolate where he knew Sirius wouldn’t be able to steal it, and spread the blanket over his bed. It was soft, warmer than his own, and the weight of it settled over him like a quiet comfort he hadn’t realized he needed.

Sliding under the blanket, Remus felt a warmth blooming in his chest. Someone out there knew his secret, but instead of using it against him, they’d tried to make things a little easier. And he knew, without question, that he had to figure out who it was.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

The full moon had passed in a calm that Remus had never experienced before. He woke that morning still feeling sore, but the aches were manageable. Normally, the transformations left him scarred and hollow, as if all the energy and warmth had been drained from him, leaving only exhaustion in its wake. But this time, thanks to the Wolfsbane Potion and the potions from the basket, he felt… human. Less broken.

After seeing the other Marauders off to class, Remus leaned back into his bed, feeling the softness of the new blanket wrap around him like a gentle hug. He’d spent the morning drinking one of the calming potions, using the healing salve for his aches, and nibbling on a bit of chocolate to ease his nerves. And though he was grateful, he couldn’t shake the strange blend of curiosity and unease that swirled in his mind. Who knew? Who cared this much? The secrecy felt like a burden, yet he couldn’t help but feel a small glow of warmth every time he glanced at the basket.

Meanwhile, James, Sirius, and Peter were trying to answer that very question in their own way. During Potions, they’d had an idea. Whoever had brewed Wolfsbane Potion had to be incredibly skilled, so finding out who had the best marks in Potions could narrow things down. The second Slughorn dismissed them, they pounced.

Sirius leaned casually on Slughorn’s desk, grinning with exaggerated innocence. “Professor,” he began, “say I wanted to improve my Potions skills. Just hypothetically.”

Slughorn’s eyebrows lifted, clearly intrigued by Sirius’s unusual interest. “Oh? Well, it’s about time, Mr. Black. I’d say your marks could certainly use a bit of boosting.”

“Oh, I know, I know!” Sirius waved his hands, laughing a bit. “That’s exactly why I was thinking maybe a bit of tutoring could help. So… who would you say is the top student in your class?”

James sidled up next to him, nodding earnestly. “Yeah, Professor. Who’s the best at brewing?”

Slughorn looked delighted, his chest puffing with pride at the idea of his Gryffindor students taking a sudden interest in his class. He lowered his voice as though he were sharing a prized secret. “Ah, if you’re looking for someone with real talent, you’d want to speak with Y/N Y/L/N. A truly gifted student! Absolutely meticulous with her brewing, and a Gryffindor as well! You boys ought to know her.”

Sirius and James exchanged baffled glances. “Y/N Y/L/N?” James muttered, frowning in thought.

Peter piped up, looking a little surprised. “Oh, I remember her. We did a project together in second year. She’s very sweet. I suppose she’s easy to miss, always keeping to herself.”

“Right…” Sirius trailed off, scratching his chin. “Doesn’t sound like the type to be sneaking around in the dead of night to drop off mysterious gift baskets, does she?”

“People can surprise you,” Peter shrugged. “I bet she’s got her reasons.”

After classes were over, the three Marauders nearly sprinted back to the dormitory. They’d waited all day to tell Remus their findings, and as soon as they saw him, they launched right into it.

“So,” Sirius said, flopping dramatically onto Remus’s bed, “we might know who left the basket.”

Remus looked up, eyebrows raised, though he tried to appear casual. “Really?”

James nodded, practically bouncing with excitement. “Y/N Y/L/N. Slughorn says she’s his top student in Potions. And she’s a Gryffindor, so she’d know where to find us.”

The name caught Remus off guard. “Y/N Y/L/N?” He knew exactly who she was—quiet, always hanging at the edges of things, never drawing attention to herself. He remembered her from their earlier years, especially a few years back when she and Peter had done that project together. She’d been kind and incredibly smart, but she always seemed to fade into the background.

Sirius shot him a curious look. “Wait—do you actually know her?”

Remus hesitated, carefully picking his words. “I mean… I remember her. We’ve been in classes together since first year.”

But what he didn’t say was that he’d once felt drawn to her quiet kindness. She wasn’t like other students; there was a thoughtfulness to her, a gentle intelligence that had always intrigued him. He remembered her now, the shy girl who had somehow made him feel seen, and the idea that she might have left the basket stirred something inside him—a mix of hope and nerves.

Sirius smirked, leaning in conspiratorially. “Oh, you remember her, do you?”

Remus rolled his eyes, trying to hide his blush. “Look, it’s probably not her. There’s no way she’d still remember… I mean, we barely ever talked.”

James raised his eyebrows. “Barely ever talked? That doesn’t mean she wouldn’t care. Besides,” he added with a grin, “you clearly want it to be her.”

Remus glanced away, not trusting himself to deny it. Because if it really was Y/N… she’d have gone to extraordinary lengths just to help him. It would mean she knew his secret and, rather than fearing him, had quietly found a way to ease his burden. And perhaps the most surprising part? He found himself hoping it was her.

Finally, he cleared his throat. “Alright. I’ll talk to her. See if there’s anything to this theory of yours.”

The next morning, with a hint of apprehension and excitement, Remus set out to find her. He decided to look in the library first, where he thought she might be studying between classes. But as he crossed the common room, he spotted her in the far corner, curled up in a chair with a thick book on her lap.

He took a steadying breath and made his way over to her. She looked up, clearly surprised to see him, her eyes widening as he gave a small, nervous smile.

“Hi, Y/N,” he said, trying to keep his voice steady. “Do you mind if I join you?”

She blinked, a little flustered, but nodded, gesturing to the seat across from her. “Um, of course, Remus.”

They sat in a slightly awkward silence for a moment, and Remus could feel his heart beating hard in his chest. He cleared his throat, feeling the weight of her attention on him.

“So… I, uh, wanted to thank you,” he started, not sure how to bring it up. “For… everything.”

She stiffened slightly, her cheeks flushing, but kept her gaze steady. “I’m not sure what you mean,” she replied quietly.

He watched her, seeing the faintest hint of a smile playing at her lips, and knew then, without a doubt, that she was the one. “The gift basket. The potions. The blanket.” He lowered his voice. “The Wolfsbane. It helped me… more than I can say.”

Her face softened, and she nodded, understanding in her eyes. “I’m… really glad to hear that. I just wanted you to have what you needed. It’s not easy going through all that on your own.”

Remus felt his heart swell. Here she was, fully aware of the truth and yet sitting here, calm and kind, accepting him exactly as he was.

He met her gaze, feeling a sense of calm he hadn’t felt in ages. “Thank you, Y/N. I don’t know what I did to deserve that kind of kindness from you, but… it means a lot.”

They sat there in a comfortable silence, the unspoken words passing between them, understanding filling the space. He knew he’d found a friend in her—someone who saw through the mask he wore and had chosen to help, not out of pity, but because she understood what it meant to care quietly, deeply, and without expectation.

And perhaps, he thought with a hint of warmth, this was only the beginning of something much deeper.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

A/N ~ this is kinda rushed sorry, school is killing me :P

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creamflix · 1 day ago

Text

nanami kento x reader; no reader gender implied. established relationship, you're married. angst with hella comfort. bittersweet. — masterlist here ☆

book dates with nanami had always been your little ritual, even before you got married.

you’d weave through shelves hand-in-hand, exchanging thoughts on novels, old and new. it was a comfort, a reminder that in this life you’d built together, there were constants — small moments that anchored you both, familiar and cherished.

today, you spotted him tucked between two shelves in the classics section, his gaze softened, almost wistful, as he held an old, worn copy of the great gatsby. the sight brought a smile to your face at first; nanami had always appreciated literature that held depth, stories that took him back to places he hadn’t visited in years.

but as you got closer, that smile faded.

the way he stared at the book, fingers tracing over the faded cover, wasn’t the usual look of nostalgic admiration. it was something deeper, something… bittersweet.

“ken?” you called softly, stepping closer. he turned to you, surprise flitting across his face before he offered a gentle smile.

“ah,” he murmured, lifting the book slightly. “this one… it was a favorite of someone i used to know.”

your chest tightened, and an unbidden question rose up before you could silence it. “someone… from before?”

you knew he’d had a college sweetheart, a first love who shared his love for books and afternoons spent in quiet cafes. he’d told you enough about her to know she was a part of his past, someone who had helped shape him into the man he was now.

but it had never felt so tangible, so close, as it did now.

he nodded slowly, a flicker of sadness passing over his face as he held your gaze, catching the way your expression changed. “she loved this book,” he admitted, his voice low. “it was… special to her.”

your heart felt heavy, as if it was pulling itself inward to protect from a pain that was already spreading. “and… is it special to you, too?”

nanami’s gaze softened, and he took a step toward you, his hand reaching to gently cup your cheek. “she was my first love,” he said quietly, his thumb brushing over your skin in that comforting way of his. “i won’t lie to you about that. but that’s all it is, love — my past. you’re my present, my future.”

you tried to take comfort in his words, in the steady warmth of his touch, but the ache was still there, sitting heavy in your chest. “it’s just… you seemed so lost in it, like you missed that time with her.” you managed to keep your voice steady, but you could hear the strain in it, feel the vulnerability that came with laying this insecurity bare.

nanami’s brow furrowed, his hand moving to hold yours. “it’s not her i miss,” he said softly, his voice steady and sure. “those years… they were formative, yes, but i don’t regret leaving them behind.” he paused, his gaze searching yours, trying to reassure you in the only way he knew. “i’m here with you now, and that’s all that matters to me.”

you wanted to believe him, to let his words wash over you and erase the pang in your heart. but the image of him standing there, holding that book with such tenderness, kept replaying in your mind. it was a reminder that he had loved before you, deeply, and that some part of him had been shaped by someone else, someone whose memory lingered, no matter how much he tried to reassure you otherwise.

“i know you mean that,” you whispered, feeling the tears prick at your eyes. “but it still hurts… it’s like there’s a part of you that i can’t touch, something that belongs to her.”

he exhaled, pulling you closer, his arms wrapping around you in a secure, steady embrace. “i’m sorry,” he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. “i never meant for you to feel that way.”

you could feel his sincerity, the way he held you with a kind of reverence that only nanami had, and it soothed you — partly. but the hurt lingered, like an old scar reopened, a reminder that while he was yours now, he hadn’t always been.

“it’s not your fault,” you replied, your voice muffled against his shoulder. “i just… i wish i could be the only one in your memories sometimes.”

he tightened his hold, his lips pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. “i understand,” he said softly, leaning back to meet your eyes, his expression pained yet resolute. “i wish i could make you see that my heart is with you, that you’re everything to me. if there’s any way i can show you that, tell me, and i’ll do it.”

you managed a small smile, but the ache remained, a reminder of the love he’d had before you, a love that had left marks you could never erase. even with his words, his arms around you, the knowledge of his past clung to you, making this moment feel bittersweet.

and as you both stood there, surrounded by the quiet of the bookstore, you realized that sometimes, love meant carrying these bruises, letting them settle beneath the surface where they could heal in time — if they ever did at all.

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meo-eiru · 3 days ago

Note

I kinda like the small yet big detail in the game, like I'm sure myself and some other people were expecting a wholesome dating sim that would also get quite spicy (FROM HOW WE KNOW MERU)

And we all just kinda got kicked in the butt, like Starling being too hot to be true yet so terrifying at the same time, but not the terrifying kind that we know, like Micah or Silas etc

More like the type that makes you forget that he still is more a siren than a merman, like he successfully managed to lure in the whole community with his hot ass😭😭and then we get backstabbed by him munching our fingers off as if they're some carrots, like as a simple lunch snack-💀💀

Or in the other ending where it's basically simply Mae dying and getting turned into a possession and probably just another body to fill up with tongues

From my interpretation, Starling doesn't really have that kind of romantic interest in Mae, but she kinda thought it could go into that direction, but then got stabbed in the back like that😭😭(probs everyone who played it, thought like Mae there too kinda💀so we all got the betrayal🙁)

And you guys did a really good job in simply catching us all off guard in most scenes, it's it's beautifully written and drawn, I love that game so much!!!

Spoilers for the game

Honestly maybe Sel would give a different answer but I do think Starling likes Maelyn. Due to his past and what he has now become his way of showing it is probably different, but for Starling I don't think Maelyn is just another body for storing tongues. If that was the case he wouldn't have went out of his way to clean her body up, find a wedding dress and "marry" her in his own makeshift way.

He probably didn't even view it as a betrayal. Because until the very end Starling was making sure the no longer breathing Maelyn could be comfortable in her pearl necklace.

For the writing style, probably Sel writing the story played a big part in this.

Sel and I have very similar tastes in a lot of things, on levels I myself can't believe sometimes. But we do have a different style at how we depict similar concepts.

I love presenting dark stories on a silver platter. Prettied up with the most delicious icings and shiniest sprinkles. I like my stories and characters to look beautiful. Enjoy them while thinking you're just having whimsy adventures only to realize you're done for once you truly look. Like Silas. It's easy to make fun of him, forget the things he is capable of doing as you're too busy enjoying his silliness. He feels safe, a gentle giant who loves and takes care of you.

But he's still a man who has forced himself on you not only physically but also mentally. Trapped and limited you beyond belief. No electricity, no internet, no contact with anyone other than him. Only talking to him, only feeling him, only knowing him, only consuming him. A beautiful and sweet man no human mind can handle for more than a few weeks.

But Sel, from what I've seen, is a bit different. She doesn't shy away from showing the darkness and scariness of the stories she makes. Before you even know it you'll be facing concepts you didn't think could be possible.

And not only that, she hides so much under every word she uses. Often times the things she places in front of you are not even the scariest parts. The more you read and the more you decipher they get deeper.

I'm frankly a big fan of the things she writes. They often leave me flabbergasted (and mortified, she knows what I mean) but they are also so so fun. So scary yet beautifully poetic.

I know she doesn't like being under the spotlight that much. But ever since I met her and saw her stories I wanted more people to get the chance to see and appreciate them the way they deserved. I think they are truly special, and they make me want to do my best to illustrate them in the perfect way possible.

Honestly I'm not sure if I'm good enough at it, but if it helps the stories reach more people I'm happy with it.

I don't know if she'll read this post so that's why I'm being sappy like this but I genuinely hope you guys like her stories like I do. And I hope both you and I can see more and more of it.

#asks #hold your tongues #spoilers

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luvleyshif4 · 2 days ago

Text

PLAYING WITH FIRE

Rafe Cameron x Reader

Summary: Being Rafe’s girlfriend wasn’t exactly on your ‘to-do list,’ but when it happened, you didn’t dare to complain. Now, he knows your love language, and he’s using it to drive you crazy in all the right ways.

Warnings: Mild sexual tension (if you could call it that), Readers love language is physical touch, Young adult theme, Peer teasing, Flirting, Kissing. Mention of Sarah and topper being a couple….

Word count: 1.42k words

Authors note: I kinda woke up and thought of how my love language is physical touch and I wanted to make this cute fluff for yall…hope yall like it!!! Lemme know if yall like it pls🥹🥹

Rafe Cameron and y/n were always a part of the same crowd, growing up in Figure Eight’s elite world of yacht parties, bonfires, and high-end privilege. Rafe, with his brash confidence and magnetic charm, had always been on her radar, though more as the guy who thrived on pushing her buttons than anything else. Their banter was infamous within their group, he’d tease, she’d throw sharp comebacks, and their friends would roll their eyes at the obvious tension.

It wasn’t until a party at the club a few weeks ago that things changed. Amid the chaos of drunken laughs and loud music, Rafe kissed her. It wasn’t sweet or hesitant, it was demanding, a declaration more than anything else. It took Y/N by surprise, but it also felt right. From that moment, they were together, though the shift from sparring partners to a couple was still something she was adjusting to. Rafe, on the other hand, seemed to take to the relationship naturally, slipping into the role of boyfriend as if he’d been waiting for it.

Tonight was one of their usual bonfire gatherings with their tight-knit group: Sarah and Topper, Kelce and his girlfriend, and now Rafe and Y/N. The dynamic was comfortable yet charged, especially with Rafe’s knack for teasing her in ways only she would notice. He knew her love language was physical touch, and he wielded that knowledge like a weapon, subtly pushing her limits just to see her reactions.

——

The beach was alive with laughter and the rhythmic crashing of waves, the warm glow of the bonfire casting flickering shadows on the sand. A cooler of drinks sat open— away from the fire, and the scent of roasted marshmallows mingled with the salty sea air. The group had claimed their usual spot near the shore not too close to the water, their blankets spread out in a semicircle around the fire.

Y/N sat in front of Rafe, her back pressed lightly against his chest, her legs tucked comfortably in front of her. His legs framed hers, his body a solid, warm presence behind her. It was a cozy setup, but one that made her hyperaware of him, his closeness, his touch, his breath against her hair.

Everyone was relaxed, chatting and laughing as they passed around snacks. Sarah was curled up in front of Topper, her head resting on his shoulder while he absentmindedly twirled a strand of her hair. Kelce was sprawled out on a blanket with his girlfriend, gesturing animatedly as he told some exaggerated story about their last surf session.

Y/N tried to focus on the conversation, but Rafe had other ideas. His hand, resting casually on her hip, flexed slightly, his fingers pressing just enough to make her shift. It wasn’t an obvious move, no one else would notice, but it sent a jolt through her, her pulse quickening.

“You good?” Rafe murmured, his voice low and teasing, just loud enough for her to hear.

She tilted her head slightly, giving him a look over her shoulder. “Perfectly fine.”

His lips quirked into a smirk, the kind that made her stomach flip. “Sure you are,” he muttered, his tone dripping with amusement.

——

Rafe could tell he was driving her crazy, and he loved it.

She was trying so hard to keep her composure, to stay focused on the conversation happening around them, but Rafe knew better. He knew the way her body tensed slightly every time he moved, the way her breath hitched when his fingers brushed against her skin. It was subtle, but to him, it was obvious.

He leaned forward slightly, his chin brushing against her shoulder as he reached for the bag of chips in front of them. His hand grazed hers in the process, and he saw her stiffen just for a moment before relaxing again.

“You want some?” he asked, holding the bag out to her.

She turned her head slightly, giving him a look that was equal parts annoyed and flustered. “No, thanks.”

Rafe smirked, pulling a chip out of the bag and popping it into his mouth. He leaned back again, his arm draping lazily across her waist as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

——

Rafe was impossible.

She could feel his hand on her waist, his fingers brushing against the hem of her tank top in a way that was almost casual but definitely deliberate. It wasn’t fair how effortlessly he got under her skin, how easily he made her hyperaware of every point of contact between them.

“Rafe,” she muttered under her breath, her tone laced with warning.

“Hmm?” His voice was light, innocent, as if he had no idea what he was doing.

She turned her head slightly to glare at him, but the look in his eyes made her pause. He was watching her with a mixture of amusement and something else, something that made her heart race.

“You’re ridiculous,” she said, her voice low enough that only he could hear.

He grinned, leaning in closer so his lips were near her ear. “You love it,” he murmured.

She hated how right he was.

——

The night wore on, the group’s laughter and chatter mingling with the sound of the waves. Y/N had long since given up trying to ignore Rafe’s antics, though she’d never admit how much she enjoyed them. His touches grew bolder as the night went on, a hand on her thigh, his fingers tracing idle patterns against her skin, his lips brushing her temple when he leaned in to whisper something.

It wasn’t just about teasing, though. There was a tenderness to his touches, a quiet reassurance that he was there, that she was his. And despite her initial resistance, Y/N found herself leaning into him more and more as the night went on.

By the time the night sky was even more darker than it previously was, she was fully settled against him, her head resting on his shoulder as his arms wrapped around her waist. The others were still talking, but their voices felt like background noise, the rest of the world fading away as she focused on the steady rhythm of Rafe’s breathing.

“You good?” he asked again, his voice softer this time, as he tilted his head slightly to rest his chin against her temple.

She nodded, her eyes closed as she relaxed against him. “Yeah. I’m good.”

And for once, she wasn’t just saying it. She meant it.

Rafe’s arms remained draped loosely around her waist, his fingers idly tracing patterns against her hip. She couldn't focus on what anyone else was saying. Not when every casual brush of his hand sent little sparks of electricity through her, grounding her in the moment but making her heart race all the same.

She tilted her head slightly to glance up at him. His sharp profile was illuminated by the glow of the fire, his messy blond hair falling into his eyes as he laughed softly at something Kelce said. The sight made her chest tighten in a way she wasn't used to.

Rafe must have felt her gaze, because he looked down, catching her eyes. His smirk softened into something more tender, he gave her a soft smile.

"What?" he asked, his voice low and teasing, but his eyes held something deeper.

"Nothing," she murmured, a small smile tugging at her lips.

His brows raised slightly, unconvinced.

"Doesn't look like nothing."

he reached up, his hand brushing against her cheek as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. The gesture was unhurried, almost absentminded, but it sent a warmth spreading through her chest.

Her breath caught as his hand lingered, his thumb grazing her jawline. He leaned in slowly, his eyes flicking to her lips before meeting hers again.

"You're staring," he murmured, his tone teasing but laced with something softer as he smiled down at her.

"Maybe I like staring at you," she shot back, her voice quieter now. She couldn’t hold back the smile that only grew on her face.

That was all the invitation Rafe needed.

He tilted his head, his lips brushing softly against hers, the kiss deliberate but unhurried. It wasn't about showing off or proving anything; it was just them, lost in a quiet moment in the middle of everything.

Her hands instinctively reached up, gripping the fabric of his shirt as she kissed him back. She could feel his smile against her lips, the way his hand slid back to cradle the nape of her neck, grounding her as much as she grounded him.

"Okay, seriously," Sarah's voice broke through the haze, pulling them back to reality. "Are you two going to come up for air, or should we move the bonfire to give you some privacy?"

Laughter erupted around them, and Y/N pulled back shifting slightly, her cheeks flushing as she buried her face in Rafe's shoulder. He only chuckled, his arm tightening around her waist and wrapping around her shoulders as he shot Sarah a smug grin.

"Jealous, sis?" he quipped, earning an eye roll from Sarah and another round of laughs from the group.

Y/N couldn't help but smile despite her embarrassment, leaning into Rafe's hold as his thumb stroked lazily against her side.

He leaned down again, his lips brushing against her ear as he murmured, "They can tease all they want. I don't care."

And somehow, neither did she.

#rafe cameron #rafe x reader #obx #rafe obx #rafe cameron x you #rafe cameron fanfiction #drew starkey #outer banks #rafe Cameron imagines #Rafe Cameron fluff #drew starkey x reader #drew starkey x y/n #obx fanfiction #outer banks fanfiction

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ghouldump · 3 days ago

Note

(sending this again because i think tumblr deleted it!)

loustat x reader, and reader at the time is the only mortal in their relationship until reader privately asks louis to turn her (can be gn, i mainly read fem!reader stuff) into a vampire so she can commit herself to them eternally, louis says no in order of protecting her, they argue a bit before she agrees and a few days later lestat finds out and he does it for her and louis is not happy. even though he wanted her to stay innocent he still wanted to be her maker

and if u want u can take it from there :)

All I Ask Of You | Lestat x Reader x Louis

ෆ when lestat takes matters into his own hands, leaving louis to sit in his regret of not complying with your wishes.

i will be booked and busy tomorrow, so the bulk of post will be up on saturday, i hope you can accept this for now, my lovelies 🤲🩷

“Please, Louis”

“I told you, my answer is no,” he raised his voice, turning away from you. How could you ask him for such a thing? He and Lestat promised to fulfill your every desire, but not this, not when you had so much to live for.

“Fine,” you had been trying for days now to get him to comply, but he wouldn't budge.

“Don’t be like that, it is for the-

“For the best, I know, I heard you the first time, listen, I can’t stay tonight, could you tell Les for me?” you asked, already headed towards the door before he could speak. You refused to cry in front of him, swinging open the door of the townhouse, just as Lestat was entering the gate.

“Ma ch-

“I’m in a rush, Louis will explain,” you pulled away from his reach, leaving him to stare bewildered at your figure becoming more distant. He wanted to question what happened while he was away, but as he began to open his mouth, something about the gloom in Louis’s eyes kept him from speaking.

“She has errands,” he mumbled, as Lestat nodded.

Silently, he followed behind Louis locking up the house as they prepared for sunrise. He wasn’t sure what he’d missed, but he was determined to find out, soon enough.

“Y/n, are you sure you’re alright darling?” Your mother asked as she leaned against the counter watching as you helped put away the leftovers from dinner.

“Yes, why?”

“You never come home, and now you’re here. Not only that, we’re going on day 3, what’s going on?”

“Nothing, I can’t miss home?” you frowned.

“I didn’t say that, it’s just that it seemed like you were never leaving New Orleans, it’s been months and you’re only an hour away,” she explained. There wasn't a proper way to tell her, or your father, that you had fallen in love with two vampires, one being a few decades older, while the other — a few centuries.

“I’m sorry, I’ll visit more often,” you told her, watching as she smiled, going to pull you into a hug.

“Good, your father and I get so lonely”

“You should move to New Orleans, get out of Covington, and live a little,” you laughed.

“Absolutely not, this is home, I’ll take it from here, you go ahead and get ready for bed,” she waved you off.

“Goodnight,” you said, as she kissed your forehead.

“Goodnight sweet pea,” she called as you walked down the hall, going to your old bedroom.

Entering the room, you inhaled the vanilla aroma, as your mind drifted to your lovers. Only three days and you already felt sick to your stomach. You wondered if they missed you as much as you missed them. You told your roommate to simply tell them you were out of town if they showed up at your apartment, but you weren't sure how much longer you could continue with this.

Going to the connected bathroom, you filled the bathtub with warm water. Staring into the water, your mind drowned with regret. You had been so inconsiderate to Louis, expecting him to take on such a big responsibility.

“Louis,” you moaned breathlessly, as he kissed along your collarbone.

“I want you to turn me,” you said, the oxygen seemingly getting caught in your throat, as he stopped, before pulling away from you.

“Where is this coming from?” he asked, his voice comforting, as he sat up, trying to concentrate on your thoughts.

“I love you both and I want to give myself to you and Lestat, forever, from this point on,” you vowed to him.

“Y/n, you don't know what you're saying, you are amazing, everything is perfect the way it is-

“Until I begin to age, and become decrepit, please Louis, become my maker, as Lestat is yours”

“You don't realize how precious life is until it is no longer in your reach. I can't do this to you, I can't take away your life when you have so much purpose,” he told you, wiping your tears as you began to cry.

Turning off the faucet, you huffed, roughly wiping the tears from your eyes. The fact that you were crying over him telling you no made you feel adolescent compared to the two. Tossing your clothing into the hamper, your muscles tensed before relaxing, as you submerged into the warm water.

Laying back, you closed your eyes, relishing in the therapeutic sensation. Humming in relief, you focused on clearing your mind. You would only stay here a few more days before you headed home. You had built a life in New Orleans and you wouldn't leave it behind, and you certainly had no intentions of closing this chapter of your life with Louis or Lestat, over this situation.

Feeling a cool breeze across the water, you crossed your legs, shifting to feel the warmth, with your eyes still shut. Only a few minutes passed before the chilling fingertips brushed against your skin, causing you to open your eyes, sitting up. Looking around, you didn't see a person as you sighed, laying back again, closing your eyes.

“How we’ve missed you,” Lestat spoke, making you jump, but quickly relaxed as he reassuringly massaged your shoulders.

Standing behind you, he crouched down, kissing along your neck, licking away the water droplets, while you held back your moan.

“Louis isn't here,” he answered your thoughts before you could ask.

“He says you're upset with him, but won't say why,” he said, his large hands rubbing down your abdomen into the warm water.

“No, he should be upset with me,” you sat up, abruptly, facing him.

“Do tell why?” he smirked.

“I asked him to turn me…into a vampire,” you said, your face burning in shame.

“And he said no-

“He is only trying to protect me, I didn't understand but I do now,” you said, unable to meet his eyes.

“But that isn't what you want, chèrie, is it?” he asked, as the waterworks began to pour. Shaking your head, as you finally met his eyes.

“I want an eternity with the two of you, the thought of me getting old and you both becoming a distant memory, if I even remember, it scares me, could I even live a normal life ever again, after sharing my heart with the two of you,” you said, as he stood up straight, reaching for the soft towel. Using his free hand, he helped you stand, wrapping the towel around your frame, before leading you out of the bathroom.

“You wanted Louis to change you, to allow him to experience what I have given him, but this is just as sentimental. Giving the gift to two extraordinary souls who I love greatly, would you like that, chèrie?” He asked, wrapping his arm around your waist.

“Yes, please,” you admitted embarrassingly.

“Do you vow to only love Louis and I, for an eternity? Forever is a very long time, go ahead, answer in the presence of God,” he motioned to the crucifix hanging on your wall.

“I do,” you nodded earnestly.

“Then you will be my fledgling, with my blood running through your veins,” he said, swiftly pulling you into his arms, before his fangs were out, plunging into your soft skin. You could feel your body weakening as he drained your blood, before he finally pulled away. Biting into his wrist, he soon placed it against your mouth.

“Drink,” he instructed, his eyes full of endearment as you moaned at the taste of his blood. You had licked your own wound as a child and the taste of iron was nothing worth comparing to his blood, you almost couldn’t stop, until he pulled his arm away.

“Thank you Les,” you said tiredly, as he grinned, kissing your neck, before sitting your limp body on the bed. Walking away, he became to boredly pack your things. He knew his intuition was correct, you had been wanting this for a while now and he had a feeling it started nearly three months back, when you asked if you could join them, as they hunted.

Watching you closely, as you sat up, hurling onto the floor, you clutched your stomach in agony. Groaning, you began to vomit on the floor, chills all over your body. Lestat neatly placed everything in your suitcase, going to zip it. Noticing your quietness, his smirk widened, as you now stood unfazed, the towel covering the vomit, as you stood nude with poise. Your new eyes and nails catching his attention, you certainly were a beautiful vampire.

“You look like perfection,” he approached you.

“I feel like…perfection”

“Let us find your first hunt, as you know with Louis’s situation, staying here won’t be possible, with your new life,” he said, as you nodded, going to grab clothing from the luggage, while looking for a pen and paper — leaving your mom a random excuse for why you had to leave.

“Do you think Louis will be mad at us?”

“Very”

“You have to suck not bite,” Lestat said, holding down your victim, as you straddled the guys lap, your fangs deep in his neck. You had made it back to New Orleans and the first thing Lestat took you to do was find your first meal. You were a natural, as you intentionally looked through the selection of people. When finally, you chose some creep, he was a bad man and you felt you were doing a bit of justice, ridding the world of such garbage.

Suddenly the front door opened, there was a few footsteps before he spoke, “What the fuck is going on?” Louis asked confusedly. Pulling away from the man, he tried screaming, begging for help, when Lestat snapped his neck.

“Did you enjoy dinner?” He asked you, as you bashfully nodded.

“Y/n,” Louis called out. Slowly facing him, you smiled, blood dripping down your mouth.

“Hi Louis”

“You turned her, now why the hell would you do that?” He yelled at Lestat.

“She wanted this, would you have preferred she stumbled across another vampire-

“I would have preferred you left her as she was,” Louis argued.

“I wanted this Louis, he was only helping-

“You don’t know what you’re talking about, Y/n, you weren’t ready, and you took advantage of her ignorance,” he screamed as Lestat sighed, rolling his eyes.

“Louis, I wanted this for more than anything, to be alongside you both, an eternity together-

“Don’t you think I know what you want, I’ve heard your thoughts, it doesn’t change the fact that it was not smart. You just threw away everything, your family, your friends, life, you’re dead now, and there is no going back,” he said, as you hesitantly climbed from the limp body. His tone brought an uneasiness to your heart, your eyes stinging.

“All I wanted, all I thought I wanted, was to be with you and Lestat. I can’t see myself with anyone else, but I’m sorry, please don’t be angry with Lestat,” you said, the dark blood leaking from your eyes. Lestat reached for you, but you moved, walking out to the backyard.

“Are you seriously that angry, Louis, how long did you expect her to wait?” Lestat asked.

“Why did you do it? She didn’t have to be turned into this,” Louis shook his head, glancing in the direction of the backyard. Regretting how harsh he sounded, as he spoke to you.

“Louis, you can still protect her as a vampire, I know you only wanted to look out for her, but she wanted the gift, she chose to love us over her parents and friends, she was worthy,” Lestat said.

“I was too harsh to her,” Louis mumbled.

“Then you should be apologizing to her, and thanking me for making yet another beautiful fledgling,” Lestat smirked.

“She is beautiful, you did good,” Louis nodded.

“Again?”

“Again,” he laughed, sighing as Lestat approached him, pulling him into a hug, placing a soft kiss to his lips.

“Go now”

Louis hesitantly walked outside, stopping in his tracks, seeing you sit in the grass. Looking up at the bright moon. Clenching his jaw, he forced his legs to move, before he sat next to you, watching your side profile.

“The moon looks nice tonight,” he spoke up.

“It does, doesn’t it. She glows so beautifully, the sun has no choice but to hide from her presence,” you said, your face unmoving from the sky.

“I apologize for how I spoke to you, I want you forever, both of us do. I’m more angry with Lestat than you”

“Don’t be upset with Les, please, he knew I wanted this, and I think it was only a matter of time, before I was begging him next,” you explained.

“I think I’m more angry about the fact that he changed you, and not me,” he said, grinning as you finally looked at him.

“I thought I was protecting you, keeping you from our world, when you fit so perfectly in it — I wish I would have gone through with it,” he admitted.

“It is okay, really, as long as I’m with you both, I am happy,” you said, reaching for his hands.

“Is there anything I can do, to make up for this…”

“Love me, your love is all I ask of you,” you said, accepting his kiss.

“I feel quite excluded, where are my kisses?” Lestat spoke, as he stepped outside.

“If you come any closer, you may end up with more than a kiss, both of you, I feel like the happiest girl alive,” you said, as he moved to the grass, kissing along your neck.

“Then we are starting our eternity together on the right track”

#amc iwtv #interview with the vampire #iwtv #lestat de lioncourt x reader #lestat x reader #lestat de lioncourt #louis x reader #louis de pointe du lac x reader

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xviperstrikex-archive · 2 days ago

Text

Titus offered a small smile, kissing him back. He wrapped his arms around Finn and took a deep breath. He'd never told anyone the full story outside of Divon before. Except Divon had to fight to get it out of him, wanting to be able to help him the right way. This time felt different. There was so much uncertainty. He wasn't sure Finn was going to stick around. The thought of Finn knowing his story and having no intentions of coming around again scared him.

"My mom was kidnapped when she was about ten. They trained her to be the perfect sex slave and then sold her off at an auction. She was bought by the governor of Florida and he kept her locked in the basement of one of the houses he used for what he called business trips. Really he was just making excuses to get away from his wife and use my mom in whatever way he pleased. She was sixteen when she got pregnant with me. The guy let her have a little more freedom to roam the house but he made it clear that I was going to be conditioned and sold just like her. I was four the first time I tried to run away. He beat the shit out of me. I tried again when I was eight. That time he sold me off to one of his friends in Texas." His voice wavered a bit. "He used to starve me when I wouldn't listen. I wasn't allowed to wear clothes. He liked seeing how skinny I'd gotten. He kept me until I was sixteen when he sold me off to avoid scandal while running for governor. I ended up in Arizona with some piercer. He made me work the corner every night and I had to meet a quota. If I didn't make enough he'd make me stay out till I did and then he'd punish me. When I was nineteen I met this kid who was like sixteen working the streets. My pimp wanted him, wanted to do to him what was being done to me but I wouldn't let him. The kid had a chance to get out of that. I didn't want someone fucking that up for him. So I took extra punishments. I slipped the kid money any chance I got even though it meant staying out longer, dealing with more aggressive clientele. He's the one who branded me. It was a punishment for giving that kid all the money I made that night. When I was twenty, he sold me off to a friend of his who was a regular. That guy proceeded to drive to New York with me in his trunk. It was with him that the gang found me. Caine was running drugs since there weren't any scraps going on that night. She walked in on them taking pictures of me for an auction and called in the rest of the crew. They gunned everyone down but I was scared. I broke Divon's arm when he tried to grab me and then his leg to make sure he couldn't chase me. I put Alasdair in a headlock, thinking if I took down the tallest guy there they'd leave me alone. But Caine hit me with a mean left hook and knocked my ass out. When I came to we were in Kehlani's car. I took a book of matches off of Aspen and lit the car on fire, not caring if I survived or not. When they finally got me here to the house and to JP I punched him in the face. They left me alone in what's now the guest bedroom and let me have free roam of the house. It took me two weeks before I was finally comfortable enough to talk to anyone. Divon told me I could leave but I'd owe him money for the damages done to his people and the car, or I could stay and join the crew. He told me if I joined that he'd make sure nobody could hurt me like that again. He promised me we'd save anyone we came across in that position. I didn't have any money and there was no way in hell I was going back to selling myself on the streets so I chose to stay. I don't know what became of my mom. The politician that got her pregnant still holds a seat of power and probably still buys and sells others. I used to want to look him in the face, show him what I've become but not anymore. I'm living for me now. The only person I have to prove myself to is me."

"You know my shifty story, it's only fair that I know yours." Finn leaned down to kiss Titus softly before laying across his chest.

#tw

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niceonejames7 · 3 days ago

Text

the vices of mice

james potter x reader

fluff, friends to lovers(?)

warnings: none really

content: james didn't envision his second date with you to involve so many......rats?

a/n: i kinda hate this ngl, ive looked at this too long. terribly nervous to post but fuck it we ball

Mice.

No offense to Wormtail, they were not James' favourite. But unfortunately, actions always have consequences, and this was it. Mice, popping up in their room, out of nowhere! Someone has retaliated to one of their pranks, and as hilarious as it was to watch Sirius jump around before he had the idea to turn into Padfoot and run away, it had become a nuisance, just in the span of a day. Sirius had made it very clear he wasn't scared of them (he definitely was) which "comforted" Peter (no it didn't, it was very clear that he was scared).

Remus had very explicitly said he would not do it, because he respects his friend's kind. But when after a week, the mice had taken over the dorm, running over sleeping bodies, ruining clothes, eating hidden stashes of sweets and chocolates, it was very clear what needed to be done. The predicament became much more severe when Sirius started wailing about his "lost hair" which had been "eaten by the rats". That's because it's shedding season Pads, Remus jokes.

Some would say this was a diabolical move, as the announcement to finally get rid of the mice was made on a Monday, the exact Monday when it was James' turn to keep the dorm clean, an exercise started by Remus. Previous week, it had been Remus's shift, but the full moon had rolled around, and James didn't have the heart to accuse his friend. If he can go through the extensive process of becoming an animagus, he can get rid of mice, though the former was a much more interesting project.

But this was not his biggest worry of the week, as surprising as it must be.

James had gone on a date.

And now he wasn't sure how to ask for another one.

Oh, the horror.

It had been a week since the date, and you had had a great time. The date had been a success, even though you were pretty nervous. James and you had known each other for a while, and it took much coaxing from Sirius and Peter and a particularly meticulous plan made by Remus to get you two to go on a date.

Now, both of you shut out again, a game being played on who will ask first. Bit of you wanted to win, but the paranoia of losing was much too great.

Two days went by but there had been no progression. Remus, again, had to take matters into his own hands.

"James, just go ask her out. She's not gonna say no!" He exclaimed to the bespectacled boy, who was now rolling his fork to capture his noodles in a spiral, but as he lifted his fork they fell down and James took a bite of a single noodle. But he kept his vision glued to yours. You were unaware of your admirer, or as Remus put it, stalker.

"Actually, I don't care. Just get rid of the rats." He said, shooting a quick apologetic glance to Pete which he responded to with a wave of his hand. He slung his backpack and began leaving the Hall, with Sirius and Peter hot on his tail. James took his time, finally took a few bites of his food and started cleaning up.

He took his last bite when he heard a voice say, "I thought you four had all the same classes."

His head perked up and he saw you, sitting opposite to him, nibbling at Sirius' leftovers, or well, the crusts of bread he had cut off. Fucking prince, you thought.

James was caught a little off guard and he couldn't explain why he decided to slurp the single noodle in his mouth before responding. He had anticipated the wait to be around five seconds, but it seemed as if the noodles had no intention of ever ending. He tried to speed up the process but that only added to his embarrassment.

Your eyes lit with amusement as you took small bites of the crusts,"Take your time." you tease.

He finally let go of the noodles, cleared his throat and spoke as calmly as he could, "I don't take Astronomy. And Remus has Divination."

You hum and a silence follows. James had been nervous before, and now he was panicking. It wasn't a welcome feeling. He had known you since you were kids, it was always easy to talk to you. The nervous anticipating silences bothered him. Fuck this, he thought.

"We have a mice problem."

"Let's not call Pete a problem."

"Not him, you idiot."

You grin but ask,"Who else is a mouse?"

He sighs before responding, having flashbacks to Remus' lectures."We got payback for a prank we pulled. I'm willing to bet this was your friend Marlene's work."

You were willing to bet on it too. The Slytherins wouldn't do something so secret. They liked to show that they had won.

"Suddenly she's only my friend?" You ask with mock skepticism,

"Real friends don't do this."

"Speak for yourself." He grins wide, caught in his own accusations.

"How do you plan on solving it? Burn down her dorm?"

"Unfortunately, I can't. Something very special to me belongs there." He says, a pleased smile taking over his face, which made you smile in return.

"Huh? What do we have of yours?"

"You. Can't let your pretty head burn, can i?"

This took you by surprise, and there were no quips you could respond to him with. A quick blush covered your cheeks and he tilted his head, his smile contagious. You rolled your eyes playfully and tried to brush off your giddiness, "Alright, what are you gonna do?"

"Well, if I don't clean up the dorm by today Remus is going to be my head." James says, thinking back to a few minutes ago. He also remembered how he had told him to 'just ask her out', and a terrible idea popped in his head.

"Would you help me?" He asks, his voice a little quiet. He tried for an air of nonchalance, he didn't think he had achieved it.

"You want me to help you shoo out mice?" You ask, your eyebrows raised.

He only shrug his shoulders, a pleading expression on his face,

"Alright. Sure." You agree, as if you would ever give up a chance to spend more time with him. "I've always wanted to chase mice anyway." You make an excuse, which makes no sense.

"You've 'always' wanted to?" He asks skeptically,

"You have your fantasies, and I have mine, Potter."

"Strange fantasies you got there." He says, slinging his bag over his shoulders and extending a hand, inviting you.

You follow his lead, a bright grin on your face and James' heart does a few cartwheels.

…

"Let me get this straight," Sirius says, holding up his hand to any obstructions, "You asked her to clean YOUR dorm room, which is infested with mice because of YOUR prank, and she's still coming?"

"She's not cleaning it for me." James tries to justify his poor choices,"None of you pricks will help me. So I had to ask for help."

"You must be packing for her to agree with this sorry excuse of a second date."

"Wouldn't you like to know loverboy?" James extends his hands and makes kissy faces towards Sirius when Sirius swats his hands away and escapes him,

"I'll pray for her well-being. You're clearly not right in the head." Sirius says, opening the door rather dramatically before leaving the room with a grin.

"Wow, so it's not cool to kiss homies now?" he shouts after Sirius.

Remus and Peter bark out a laugh at this. They both get up and head towards the library.

He waits impatiently, fiddling with his hands and running his hands through his hair then fixing it, then doing it again and again. He was in the process of deciding whether his glasses looked better on his eyes or resting on his head, when he heard a knock on the door. The same time you always use to indicate it's you who's knocking.

A smile graced his lips and he made a last futile attempt to tame his unruly hair before opening the door.

"I brought cheese!" You hold up a bag, and sure enough, James sees a block of cheese inside.

He barks out a laugh,"For us or the mice?" still chuckling.

"I thought we could share." You say shyly and James wraps an arm around you in pity (or that's what he tells himself).

"Well, at least this will go well with the snacks." He muses.

"Do we have snacks?" You ask excitedly and he points to a pile beside his bed and you run over with grabby hands but he's quick to stop you.

"One snack for every mouse. Think of it as a treat."

After a bit of arguing over the snacks, and opening three chocolate frogs, you finally get down to business. Your hair is pulled back in a ponytail and you've set rat traps around the room when you huff,

"Tell me again why we can't use magic to summon them?"

"You don't think I've tried?"

"This is the last time I'm helping you."

He only grins and gives you pieces of cheese laced with rat poison,

"These are NOT for you." He reminds you.

You giggle and start placing the blocks where they need to be and you've already spotted the first rodent bastard, "James, look!"

James sprints towards the rat, barely catching it, his body jumping off of beds when his feet get tangled in his sheets and he falls with a thump on the bed, his hand still outstretched to reach the rodent. You both sigh in defeat when the rat escapes his reach.

"Goddamn it."

You pat his back comfortingly trying to contain your laughter and say, "It's okay, soldier."

This continued on for a while, and now it had turned into more of a laughing contest than catching (or rather chasing) rats.

You're on the floor clutching your stomach when James disposes of another rat, alive in the bag they had been collecting the rodents. James caught the first one and couldn't bear to kill it, saying it reminded him too much of Wormtail.

Your bag had two more rats than his, not that this is competition, which he has pointed out later in the game, so you were winning.

After having two rats crawl over you before catching them had you at your end, and after what seemed like a few hours of this, it felt like you both had tackled the mice problem.

"You think we're done?"

"Think so."

Both of you headed to the Care of Magical Creatures professor, feeling it more fit to hand them to someone capable. It had taken a while to explain exactly why we had so many rats in bags with us, but he had let us go.

The day had ended and both you and James headed towards the kitchen to grab a bite, after extensively washing your hands.

Sitting down at a corner the house elves had prepared for you both, a bit too nicely than either of you deserved with your untimely demands, but they didn't seem to mind.

The silence after a day of chaos was comfortable, but there was an inkling in your brain that just wouldn't go away.

"I won the game, what's my prize?"

He looks around confused pretending he has no idea what you're talking about, "What game? There was no game."

"I caught more mice than you."

"Oh, did you? I didn't notice."

You nod your head with a smile, a grin fighting to break out. As you take bites of your food, occasionally casting each other a look after a day of enjoying each other's presence, it feels an awful lot like…

"James…" you trail off, his eyes on yours, asking you to continue. Your bottom lip rolls between your teeth to suppress a smirk when you ask, "Was this a date?"

His chewing stops momentarily and he fixes his glasses, pushing them onto the bridge of his nose,

"Could be if you want it to be."

You scoff, amused, "Your idea of a second date is catching mice together?"

"I just wanted a helping hand from a friend-" He stops at your raised eyebrow, his own smile mirroring yours,"I didn't ask you about this as a date. It just…" He trails off, looking for the right words,

"... happened."

"Yeah. Something like that."

His eyes flicker to your lips and there's a moment of hesitation but he leans down anyway, slowly. His lips are just a whisper away from yours,"We could make it an official date."

Your hands rested on his chest, another barely holding onto the piece of orange from your plate, "Good idea."

His smile is wider than ever when his lips lock with yours, slow and teasing as his hands curl deeper into our hair. You sigh into the kiss and you can hear James chuckle, and you swat his chest, which is only responded with him deepening the kiss. You abandon your orange to free your hand when you hear a loud hiccup, "Oh, Missy apologizes deeply. She didn't mean to see that, or interrupt you. Missy feels sorry, please forgive me, I will leave." A house elf, her eyes wider than they already are is covering her face with her hands.

"Missy, no, it's alright, wait don't leave-" She's gone into thin air before either of you could say anything.

You look at James with a defeated look and he says, "I'll find a better place for the third one."

"This one might need a do over, though." You gesture between the two of you,

"Oh, really?" He asks, a teasing edge to his voice,

"Mhm. Multiple runs, so we know which one's the best one."

"I like the way you think."

#james potter x reader #james potter x you #james potter x y/n #james potter imagine #self insert #james potter fanfiction #james potter drabble #james potter #sirius black #remus lupin #marauders #hp marauders #marauders era #james potter fluff

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naughtyneganjdm · 2 days ago

Text

Love's Second Chance: A Holiday Reunion - Chapter 3

Summary: Joel and Y/N force themselves to get over their tension while they spend time together with their children at the Christmas event. Talking about their past awakens feelings inside of both them that they haven't felt for each other in a very long time.

Characters: Joel Miller, the reader (OC), Negan Smith (mentions), Lydia, Carl Grimes, Peter, Elizabeth, etc.

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/60501985/chapters/154729198

Warnings: 18+, Swearing, Smut, Unprotected P in V, Rough Sex, Car Sex, Public Sex, Grumpy Joel, Loads of Angst, Bickering, Spanking, Slight Choking, etc.

Notes: This chapter starts sweet, but then it just becomes absolutely filthy. Lots and lots of smut. There are also incredible amounts of angst that are in this chapter with the two characters talking about their past together. There is NO Negan in this chapter, but they do talk about him a little bit. Thanks for reading!

Things were quiet. And not the comfortable kind of quiet. When Joel agreed to bring Y/N tonight, he never really considered how weird it would be having her here. It had been a while since they had spent time together like this out with the kids. Sure, Peter and Elizabeth brought two of their friends. Which meant they were distracted, but that also meant that it left Y/N and Joel alone together. Because of how things had been, Joel was uneasy with talking. Then again, he wasn’t really good with talking to begin with. But having an in-depth conversation with his ex-wife didn’t seem like it would be too easy.

“I was surprised that you accepted the offer to come tonight,” Joel walked side by side with Y/N with their children and their friends in front of them. On the ride to the historic village, they didn’t really talk much. The children did most of the talking and they just listened. Once they got in, things were awkward with the silence so Joel did his best to start a conversation. “I thought you would be too tired.”

“You’re surprised that I wanted to spend more time with our children?” she smirked, gazing over at him when Joel rolled his eyes with his own ignorance. Of course she would jump at more time with Peter and Elizabeth. Especially during the holidays. She was a good mother that loved her children very much so thinking back on it, that comment was kind of stupid. Joel shoved his hands into his pockets and she could tell that he was uncomfortable. “I was surprised that you allowed them to ask me to come. I realize that there are things you like doing with them alone.”

“They were pretty insistent,” Joel retorted with a frown, nodding forward toward where there children were looking. The village had old homes and buildings that were decorated to match the year and location of what it would have been like at that time for Christmas. Each section was lit up differently. The children seemed more interested in it than Joel did since he was trying to strike a conversation. “They want us to spend more time together as a family.”

Hearing him refer to the four of them as a family was strange because that wasn’t typical for Joel. Especially over the last few years. There was a clear separation between them with the children and that was something she had grown used to.

“I hate to admit it, but I ate most of the cookies you sent over,” Joel informed her with a weak smile seeing the amusement in Y/N’s eyes. Changing the subject to something more innocent seemed like the only way he knew how to keep the conversation positive. “Once I start eating them, it’s just addictive and I can’t stop.”

“And that’s why you’re getting soft,” Peter blurt out, turning on his heel hearing his father talking about the sweets that Y/N had sent home with him. Joel was surprised that Peter was paying attention to his comments at all since their son had a friend with him. Reaching out, Peter poked Joel in the stomach causing a scoff to fall from Joel’s throat. All four of the children giggled at Peter’s comment. Even though it was dark, Y/N imagined that Joel’s cheeks flushed over with red from embarrassment.

“Just wait until you’re older like me,” Joel grumbled stepping forward to place his hands in over Peter’s shoulders to give them a squeeze. “Sure, you’re skinny now, but once you get to my age you’ll see that it’s not as easy to keep the weight off. I reckon my body is average in the belly area.”

“Not if you keep up eating those cookies like you have,” Peter pointed out with a simple shrug, still working to tease his father. This was their attitude though. Peter and Joel would always give each other a hard time. In fact, Peter reminded her a lot of what Joel was like when he was that age. Except, Peter wasn’t as angry or closed off. Their banter drew Elizabeth’s attention and she also seemed amused with the joke that Peter pulled on Joel.

“Do you think I’m getting fat?” Joel directed the question at Elizabeth, who immediately shook her head and raised her hands up. Trying to opt out of the conversation all together. Elizabeth had no interest in getting into this or getting in trouble with Joel. “Come on Ellie, you’ve always been my biggest sidekick.”

“I’m taking no part in this,” Elizabeth choked back on her words, doing her best to hold her laugh in. All of the children seemed entertained that Joel was getting so worked up over the idea of being softer in the abdomen area. “I fully believe you still could knock out all my friends’ fathers. Does that help?”

“Yeah Mr. Miller,” Elizabeth’s friend blurt out, her head nodding when she gazed back at Joel. Throwing her arm up in the air, she pretended that she was flexing and scrunched up her face. “You have got those guns. So trust me, no one is going to be looking if you have a little bit of a tummy. They are going to be totally distracted by your arms.”

“Thanks Lydia,” Joel huffed, not certain of how he should feel about hearing that. There was the creeped-out factor that Elizabeth’s friends were checking out his body in any fashion. What had started as a joke had become successful in making Joel feel awkward. Especially since they had all confirmed he was a bit squishy in the middle. “I think.”

“Plus a lot of people really like your butt,” Lydia attested causing Peter to groan out at Elizabeth’s friend drawing attention to Joel’s body again. Y/N laughed at the outburst from the seventeen-year-old, noticing that Joel was incredibly embarrassed. “It stands out. And most people very much enjoy looking at it.”

“That’s not funny,” Joel countered looking over at Y/N who was trying to bite back on her laugh. Just the thought that young girls were scrutinizing his body made Joel uneasy. “You shouldn’t be looking at my…at my butt.”

“Yes, please refrain from talking about my dad’s ass,” Peter scoffed out with a disgusted sound hearing his friend that he brought with him giggling. “Carl, it’s not funny. You wouldn’t want me talking about your mom’s breasts.”

“Peter!” Y/N corrected her son’s behavior watching Peter’s arms immediately fly up in defense of himself. The expression that Peter gave her reminded her of Joel when he was younger and did something cheeky. It almost wasn’t fair how much both Peter and Elizabeth looked so much like Joel. “Don’t say that.”

“I’m just saying Mr. Miller is one of the dads we actually enjoy looking at,” Lydia addressed the situation and Elizabeth eagerly tried to hush her friend. “It’s a compliment. You should feel honored to know that.”

“I don’t…I just…” Joel shook his head, noticing that they had stopped in front of one of the old homes that they were allowed to go into. How the hell was he supposed to respond to that? There was no easy way to respond to something weird like that. “I don’t.”

“Come on,” Elizabeth groaned, dragging Lydia into the house with Peter and Carl following not far behind. By the expression over Elizabeth’s face? She was embarrassed by what Lydia had said too. Under their breaths, the two girls seemed to bicker with one another, but Lydia didn’t seem angry. In fact? She seemed amused.

“You’re one of the hot dads,” Y/N teased Joel, nudging him with her shoulder hearing him groan out. This was not a situation that Joel was comfortable with. And he was probably thankful that they were taking their time in following the children into the home they were walking through. It kept some space from Lydia who had a hard time not saying exactly what was on her mind. “It is a compliment in some fashion.”

“I’m one of the younger dads,” Joel corrected her with a grunt, keeping far back enough so that when he whispered to Y/N only she could hear him. “You’ve seen most of the dads at the school functions. Most of them are a lot older than me. We had Elizabeth when I was twenty. So of course they are going to be drawn to the younger father.”

“Right, and even those that are your age aren’t as good looking as you,” she reminded Joel, lifting her hand to playfully pinch at his cheek. The glare she got from Joel’s dark brown eyes had her laughing out. There was a lot of color in his cheeks expressing just how mortified this whole thing made him. “I’m sorry. I think this is great that you are so embarrassed.”

“Well, I got called fat and then found out that seventeen-year-olds are checking me out. I don’t know how to handle that,” Joel professed, his hand placing in over the lower part of his abdomen seeing her eyes follow his movement. “I used to be ripped when we were younger.”

“I remember,” she noted with a smirk. For a long time Joel was slender and chiseled. As a teen and a young adult, Joel was very athletic and proud of his body. It was hard to forget what he looked like when they had first hooked up. Ahead of them, she saw that the children were surrounding a demonstration in the kitchen section of the house they were in. It was someone dressed accurate to the era showing how they would have made chocolate during that time period. Since they were still in the back, she reached up to playfully squeeze at Joel’s bicep. The movement surprised him, his dark eyes narrowing when he dropped his head down to look at her. “I think your arms are much nicer now. You went from a twink to a daddy.”

“Twink?” Joel repeated what she said, amusement flooding his features. Hearing something like that from her was entertaining. Especially since they hadn’t talked much in a very long time. “I’ll take that one as a compliment.”

“You should,” she still found herself amused that the moment got so awkward between all of them. Instead of continuing on the conversation, she moved in behind the children to watch the demonstration. They allowed someone to volunteer to try and they ended up picking Peter after Elizabeth said no. Of course Elizabeth teased Peter while he did it, but it seemed like Peter was enjoying this more as a teenager than he did when he was a child when they’d bring him here. After they were done, they headed out of the house. Everything was so dark which made it hard for Y/N to notice the patch of ice that was right beneath the last step out of the house. It had Joel reaching out to hook his arm around her waist to keep her on her feet. “Thanks.”

“No worries,” Joel hooked his arm with hers to keep a hold on her so she couldn’t fall. “That’s winter for you. Hidden ice, just waiting for you to fall and break something.”

“Second time I almost died today,” Y/N informed Joel knowing that Tommy had been the cause of the one earlier where Negan saved her. “This morning your brother was supposed to be holding a ladder while I was putting lights up and instead, he ran off after his crush. A gust of wind came through and almost killed me.”

“Tommy has a crush?” Joel probed and she was surprised that was the first thing that came to mind for him. “Sorry, he just…he hasn’t said anything to me about it.”

“Yeah. There is a girl that caught his eye. They are having their first date tonight,” she informed Joel who looked confused considering this was something Tommy obviously never spoke to him about. “I helped Tommy pick his outfit.”

“How?” Joel’s face scrunched up, trying to figure that out. Considering Tommy lived in the same house as him and Y/N had never showed up to the house, he found that hard to believe.

“He sent me a few photos and I told him what would look the best on a first date,” she explained to him seeing the sense of jealousy that flooded Joel’s body. It was hard to miss. Joel didn’t like to hear that she knew something he didn’t with his little brother. “Don’t worry about it Joel. I just…am the more romantic one and I think he views me like a mother.”

“You’re not his mother,” Joel clarified, his eyebrows bouncing up. How quick Joel was to remind her of that made her feel bad. Maybe she wasn’t Tommy’s mother, but she was the closest thing he had to one. She had been his adopted parent longer than Tommy and Joel’s parents had actually been in Tommy’s life.

“Yeah, I know that. But I did adopt him too,” she pointed out hearing Joel sigh in response to that comment. A lot of the time it seemed like Joel had forgotten that she adopted Tommy as soon as she could in order to help Joel keep Tommy from going into foster care. They had to prove that they were a family that worked well together. So she had been right there with Joel to be a good parent figure for Tommy. “I helped you raise him, so I’m the closest thing he has to a mom and a mother figure is the kind of person you want to talk to when you are having your first date.”

Joel was quiet. He didn’t know how to respond to the news. Especially since he lived in the same house with Tommy and he had no idea.

“I’m okay by the way,” she interrupted his thoughts since he hadn’t spoke of the fact she almost died. That statement had Joel’s face scrunching up, confused. “No scratches or anything.”

“I assumed you were okay since you were here,” Joel acknowledged, tightening his arm around hers while they walked together. The children headed up to the next building where it was full of a bunch of activities for them to do. Joel and Y/N stood in the back since it was more so a thing for younger people anyways. “Who is his crush?”

“Maria,” she educated Joel about the woman that his brother was interested in. Joel’s face scrunched up like he was trying to picture a face to go with the name. “It’s the mayor’s daughter. Apparently they ran into each other at the diner one night. They talked to each other all night and really hit it off. I guess they have been going there every night since. He seems really hooked on this girl.”

“That’s not good,” Joel claimed, loosening his grasp on her arm now that they were inside away from any ice. “The mayor hates Tommy. Always did. If he fucks up with this girl…”

“I don’t think he will,” she suggested knowing from the way that Tommy was talking about Maria that he really seemed to like her. “It’s not like Tommy’s past fascinations. You should have seen the way he lights up about her when he talks about her. It’s sweet.”

“My brother falls in love fast,” Joel reasoned with her, grumbling under his breath when she started to walk toward a hallway at the far corner of the building they were in. Following her not far behind, Joel could see that she was looking at the photos that lined the wall. “I don’t understand why he hid this from me. I’m his brother.”

“Maybe he thought you would have tried to persuade him not to do it,” she hinted since Joel was already being negative about things as it was. “I think he just wanted to feel good about this whole thing.”

“Are you saying that you think I make him feel bad?” Joel pointed toward the center of his chest, but instead of answering him she gave him a look that made him huff. “What?”

“Nothing,” she lied looking back to the wall and pointed toward the photo that she was looking at. Considering how heated he was getting about Tommy, she was attempting to change the conversation. The entire hallway was lined up with photos of the village’s staff from each year the Christmas event took place. From the very start all the way to the year before this one. “They put the photos of everyone who works each year in here. This was our first year.”

Stepping forward, Joel’s eyes narrowed when he gazed up on the photo that she was pointing at. Chuckling Joel found himself, Y/N and Negan in the back row of the photo, “I can’t believe our daughter thought I was lying when I said he was one of my best friends.”

Tapping his finger over Negan’s face, he saw Y/N leaning in focusing on the photo where Negan had both his arms wrapped around their shoulders pulling them in closer. It made Y/N smile as she looked to Joel again, “You should have seen her face when I pulled out the photos. How old were we again here?”

“You and Negan were sixteen. If you remember my family hooked us up with the jobs to make us feel a sense of responsibility,” Y/N noticed that the children were moving over toward them after they finished what they were doing. All four of them had candy canes in their mouths when they stepped in around them to look at the photo they were looking at.

“Hey, is this you Mr. Miller?” Lydia pointed toward the photo of Joel seeing him nod. “Look at you. Chiseled jawline and everything.”

“And if you look right next to me,” Joel urged his daughter forward so she could see that Negan was between him and Y/N in the photo. “There is the man that my daughter thought I wasn’t friends with.”

“How was I supposed to know you and mom were best friends with Negan Smith? It’s not like either one of you talked about it,” Elizabeth ranted and the surprised expressions on both Lydia and Carl’s faces drew them to both step forward to tip on their toes to eye over the photo.

“That’s Negan Smith?” Carl seemed shocked when he pointed at the younger version of Negan. “Holy shit. You guys are like cool by association.”

“I was a really good baseball player back then too,” Joel announced hearing Carl laugh before silencing himself when he noticed that Joel was offended. “I was. I was really good at football too. I got a full ride to a college with how good I was.”

“Which college did you go to?” Lydia was curious when she looked back at Joel and he suddenly felt small when she asked him that. Shoving his hands into his pockets, Joel seemed to shut down and Y/N picked up on it immediately.

“Joel’s parents passed away and he had to take care of Tommy,” Y/N answered for Joel hearing him clear his throat uneasily. Why Joel was embarrassed about that always confused Y/N. It was something to be proud of. Joel was a good brother. A good family man. Explaining that to people always seemed to make Joel feel bad. “Joel gave up his life for his little brother.”

“And me,” Elizabeth breathed so quietly that maybe only Y/N heard that.

“You were the hotter one back then,” Lydia suggested with an amused breath, completely ignoring the part about Joel giving his life up for someone else. Moving to the side, they went to the next photo and then found the three of them in the photo again. “How long did the three of you work here during Christmas?”

“I worked here until I was twenty-two,” Joel answered, shifting on his feet when he thought back on their history. “Negan stopped working here when he was eighteen because, well…I’m sure you know his history.”

“Where is he?” Carl stammered when they got to the third photo that included them in it. This time Y/N and Joel were up front, but there was no Negan. Y/N stepped in beside the photo and pointed to Negan who was at the opposite end of the photo pressing a kiss against a woman’s cheek. “Oh! He found love!”

“We both did,” Joel responded looking at the way Y/N clung to him back then. It made a breath catch in his throat when he looked over at her. “That school year, the two of us started dating and Negan started dating the woman that would become his wife.”

“Why aren’t the four of you together?” Peter was curious since he really hadn’t heard this story either. The only one who had details was Elizabeth. Peter’s brown eyes seem fascinated too when he looked back to the photo.

“We just…” Joel began, swallowing down the lump that grew in his throat. “Grew apart.”

“Love made you not friends anymore?” Lydia blurt out and it had Joel tipping his head from side to side. “Well that’s sad. You’d think you’d all be happy for each other that you found your soul mates.”

Lydia paused, looking back at Y/N and Joel knowing that they were divorced and no longer together. Her face went pale when she thought about what she said, “At the time.”

“What was his wife like?” Carl wondered since all of them were obviously interested in Negan and not so much about their experiences working there.

“We didn’t really know her,” Y/N explained with a shrug of her shoulders.

“Sweet,” Joel commented at the same time she answered. Giving her a look, Joel thought about it and took in a deep breath. “I think we knew her decent enough. She talked to us a few times. I thought she was nice.”

“Sure, we talked to her some, but we really didn’t get to know her because Negan wasn’t really around anymore,” she reminded Joel of their youth and it had Joel nodding his head before moving to the next photo that only had the two of them in it.

“Look at the way she looks at you,” Lydia moved to the next photo that Joel was looking at. It impressed her the way that Y/N looked at Joel in the photo. “You must have been doing something right. That’s the look of pure love.”

Instead of responding, Joel nodded and looked through the next few photos that involved them in it. Looking to Y/N, Joel could see that she was gazing over the photo where she was pregnant with Elizabeth in it. There seemed to be something in her expression changing when she lowered her head.

After some more talk about Negan, the children wanted to go off to the next destination and they followed them close behind. It seemed like Y/N was sad after seeing the photos and Joel cleared his throat, “So uh, one thing Tommy did tell me today was that me doing the Santa photos with the children hurt your feelings.”

“They don’t,” she immediately lied with Joel’s chocolate brown eyes locked on her reaction. It seemed like he didn’t believe her and she shook her head again. This was somewhat common. Anytime she would open up to Tommy about things, he would often try to help her but it only made things worse. “Really, they don’t. I don’t know why Tommy would say something like that.”

“Are you sure?” Joel wondered seeing that she had a hard time looking at him. “You know I’ve known you my whole life, right? Well, it feels like it’s been my whole life.”

“What’s your point?” they stopped when the children asked if they could get some snacks and hot chocolate. It seemed like she was eager to get away from the conversation to pay for the things. The children sat down at a table together. It was a heavily crowded area and the two of them stepped off to the side so they could talk.

“It means that I know when you’re lying to me,” Joel whispered, leaning in closer to her and he noticed the way the warmth of his breath made her shudder. “You have a hard time looking at me when you lie. It was always your give. I could tell that you were being honest when you didn’t break eye contact.”

“Yeah,” she breathed out, holding onto the cup of hot chocolate she had gotten for herself. “I’ll have to work on that.”

“If you wanted to come, you could have told me,” Joel offered, hearing her let out a long exhale. It was one thing for him to say that, but another for him to mean it. Especially after the photos had already been taken. In the past she had expressed wanting to go and he never wanted that. “The children would have had fun with it.”

“I didn’t think you wanted me to do it anymore,” she stated, her eyes looking sad at the idea of it. Truthfully? He told her that the first year of their separation. So his change of pace made her uneasy. “I distinctly remember you telling me that I couldn’t be part of it because Tess would get the wrong idea. Then when I did it separately, you got angry with me because you wanted special moments with them that were special just for you.”

“Things are different,” Joel reminded her, shifting on his feet uncomfortably after he took a sip of his hot chocolate that she got for him. “I’ve had time to…grow.”

With a nod, Y/N didn’t know what to say because she had grown used to a certain Joel over the last few years. This one wasn’t exactly the Joel that she was used to, “Things are actually a lot better when you are around. The children are happier. I’m happier…”

“Joel,” she looked to Joel seeing the way that his eyes were hooked on her. Those words had her heart fluttering in her chest. Everything inside of her still loved Joel so it hurt trying to think that there was a part of Joel that wanted her around. “Don’t.”

“What do you mean don’t?” Joel outstretched his free hand to curl his glove covered finger underneath her chin to try to urge her to look at him. There was tension in her body when her eyes locked with his.

“Time for the fireworks,” Elizabeth interrupted, reaching for her mom’s arm to tug her toward the opposite direction of the village. “We have to get good seats. I know it’s in like an hour, but you know right by the water is best for the fireworks and we should get there before everyone else does.”

“Sure thing sweetheart,” Y/N gave her daughter a one-armed hug, following Elizabeth and the other children toward the area they wanted to sit. When they were where they wanted to be, Joel moved in beside Y/N to drop down on the bench next to her.

“Can we talk?” Joel wondered, his breathing loud when she looked to the children. They seemed lost in talking to one another and probably wouldn’t bother to pay attention now that they were waiting for the most exciting part of the night. “We can just walk for a little bit. We aren’t going to lose them. They will be here for the next hour or so.”

Considering what Joel was asking of her, she knew it was probably for the best if they did get to talk. It had been a really long time since Joel had even attempted to have a conversation with her when the children weren’t involved.

“Hey, your dad and I are going to take a walk around the park. Watch your brother and call one of us if you need anything,” Y/N stood up from the bench seeing Elizabeth nod. Stepping in front of Peter, she reached out to brush her fingers through his dark hair and heard him huff. “Listen to your sister and stay here with her. Okay?”

“Yeah, sure,” Peter waved his hand about before going back to laughing with Carl about something.

Following Joel off into the distance, Y/N wasn’t sure what to say to him when he nudged her slightly as they moved through the crowd, “Does this place bring back memories for you?”

“Lots of memories,” she remarked knowing that this place meant a lot to them when they were younger. Their job would start the first weekend of November and every weekend up all the way until Christmas. “We worked Christmas six years here. Lots of memories to be had. It was something else.”

“You were always so big on Christmas,” Joel recalled, clinging to his hot chocolate hearing the music that was playing from carolers in the distance. “After my parents died, I hated it.”

There was a silence when Y/N looked to him surprised, “I never told you because you loved it so much. It always reminded me of the things that I lost with my parents. You know how they were when it was Christmas. I could never do what they did. They weren’t great parents. We both know that, but they made it special the best way they could. And Tommy loved them so much. Christmas just reminded me that there was a piece of me that was always missing.”

“I’m sorry,” she didn’t know what to say when they stopped at the tree that was at the middle of the village. It was the biggest one and it was decorated with so many lights that it lit up Joel’s face perfectly. “I didn’t know that.”

“I didn’t want you to know that. Because I knew it made you happy,” Joel reasoned with her, his shoulders shrugging when he thought about their past together. “I made myself love Christmas because you did. And then Elizabeth did too. You two were enough to lift my spirits with the way you would get excited.”

Swallowing down hard, Y/N nodded and wasn’t sure of what to say next, “You know, when I picked you up tonight it reminded me of when we were younger. How I would park the car in front of your house, wait to pick you up. You’d run out the door with a kick to your step and each night here felt like it was a date for us. We had fun with it. You reminded me of that girl tonight.”

“Just a lot older,” she half laughed, looking down at herself with what she was wearing.

“Just as pretty,” Joel retorted watching the surprise in her features. It had been a while since he had complimented her like that. By the way color flushed into her cheeks, he could tell that she liked it. “It felt like we were going on another date again when I picked you up. You look really nice.”

“Oh yeah? Bundled up like frosty the snowman?” she chuckled getting him to laugh. “I’m sure I look great after walking around in this cold.”

“You do,” Joel reached out to sweep his fingertips in over the side of her face and under her chin. “Do you remember when we would be working and the two of us would sneak off during the fireworks? We knew we’d have to clean up and close things down, but with everyone busy with the fireworks…”

“We could have been fired,” she exclaimed with a laugh, leaning into his touch. He couldn’t help but smirk with her reaction to his comment. “Especially when we’d go off to one of the houses or the buildings. They have cameras now. Back then, they didn’t have many.”

“We weren’t making that much money anyways,” Joel recognized with a wrinkle of his nose, tipping in closer to rest his forehead against hers when he laughed. “I wouldn’t have cared if we were caught because I was just…addicted to you.”

“We were stupid,” she thought back to their younger selves and the risks they used to take just to be with one another. “There were so many people here.”

“Yeah, but you put on a fireworks show and people just don’t care,” Joel stated with a shake of his head. Just like how things were now. Everyone was desperate to get a good seat to see the fireworks that they really didn’t care about the rest of the village and what it had to offer. “In a way, it was a different kind of sex every time we hopped into a different historical house or building. It was like time travel sex and it always turned me on.”

“You are so weird, what we did was crazy,” she swatted at his shoulder, enjoying the way that he laughed. It had been so long since they had been this relaxed with one another. A breath caught in her throat when she noticed the way that Joel looked down at her lips. “Joel?”

“Crazy or madly in love?” Joel debated, leaning in just enough for his lips to brush faintly over hers. A tremoring breath escaped her lips. Just by the closeness of him like this, it had her desperate to be near him. Sweeping his glove covered thumb in over her jawline had her tipping her head back. Her eyelashes fluttered to a close allowing him to steal a kiss from her lips. Both of her palms pressed in over the center of his chest to brace herself. It had been a while since the two of them kissed like this. Compared to the cool winter air surrounding them, the warmth of her mouth against his was very welcomed. Growing in strength, each caress of his lips over hers had her pressing in closer to him wanting to be near. After a few more kisses, Joel grumbled when she stepped back to pull away. She was trembling, her lips agape with her breathing heavy. “What is it?”

“We can’t have them see us kissing,” she cautioned reminding him of their children. Even though they were further into the village and not incredibly near the water, there was still that chance that Elizabeth or Peter could have gotten up to see them kissing there. “They might get the wrong idea with things and…”

“We’re far enough away,” Joel muttered, yet she still seemed worried. Tossing what he had left of his hot chocolate in the nearest trashcan, Joel waved her forward. Extending his hand out to hers, he could tell that she was deeply considering whether to take it or not. Once she finally did grab his hand, he hooked his fingers with hers leading her through the crowd. She didn’t know how to respond when he took her back toward the front of the village. Leaving wasn’t something they should have been doing with their children still there, but Joel explained to the guard that they had to grab something from the car. After getting the okay, Joel dragged her through the parking lot leaving her curious as to what was happening. It didn’t take long for her to find out because soon Joel had grabbed a hold of her, firmly pressing her back against the SUV. Stepping in close to her, Joel trapped her between him and the vehicle causing her to gasp out. Reaching for the cup that she was still carrying, Joel carelessly dropped it down on the ground beside them. Hovering his lips over hers told him everything he needed to know by the sounds that she made. “We have until the fireworks are over. The children are fine. They aren’t gonna move and there no cameras out here. I reckon you know that just as much as I do.”

“And what is it you want to do?” she exhaled loudly with Joel using his teeth to pull off his first glove. Shoving that one into his pocket, he hastily put the other one away as well. Lifting his hands up, he cupped at her face drawing her mouth closer to him. In that moment it felt like the world was spinning around her. There was something in the way that Joel Miller could look at her that took her breath away. His eyelids grew heavy with want, hovering his mouth just over hers. “Joel?”

“I think you know,” Joel slurred, dragging his bottom lip over hers and it rewarded him with a purr from her.

Sliding his left hand down had his fingers curling around her throat. Gliding his right up allowed his thumb to caress over her bottom lip, dragging it slowly over her flesh. Almost instinctively she started to press kisses against the pad of his thumb, wincing when he applied a small amount of pressure at her throat. Collecting her lips with his, Joel was passionate in the way that he kissed her. Barely taking time to separate between breaths. Nibbling at her bottom lip had her fingers sliding up over the back of his neck to sink them into his messy, dark hair. It seemed that talking about their past had rekindled the flame that existed between the two of them leaving them both hungry to kiss the other. Sliding his hand down, Joel’s fingers found the zipper in her jacket and he tugged firmly at it. Pushing the material aside, Joel dropped his hands grasping firmly to her hips. Taking a moment to break away from the kiss, Joel’s forehead pressed to hers. Sucking in a sharp breath of air, Joel liked the way she trembled in his grasp. Taking his time, Joel started to lazily palm up over the sides of her body. It drew her lips to part and he took advantage tracing the tip of his tongue over her sensitive flesh.

“I miss being able to touch you,” Joel confessed, allowing his fingers to slide up under the bottom of the sweater that she was wearing. Panting, she lowered her head to watch the movement and he nuzzled his nose in against the side of her face. Even though it was freezing outside, they both felt like their bodies were on fire. Once the roughness of his fingers collided with her flesh beneath the sweater, it had her whimpering out. Smiling against her cheek, Joel started peppering wet kisses over her jawline, toward the side of her neck. Leaving occasional nips at her flesh left her to start faintly moaning at the sensation. These were things he knew that she liked when they were younger. It was so easy to have her melting in the palm of his hand. Pressing his kisses closer to her lips, Joel stopped when he reached them. Hovering his mouth over hers, an arrogant smile tugged at his lips with how much she was yearning to be kissed by him again. Starting slow, Joel pressed tiny kisses at her lips. And she returned the gesture. “I miss being able to kiss you.”

Each kiss grew in strength having her lips parting allowing him to flick his tongue against hers. A sweetness still lingered from their hot chocolates, but it wasn’t something that either one of them were turning away. Sucking faintly at his tongue had Joel growling out, closing the distance between them more. In that moment, it had started snowing again. Small flurries were surrounding them and he tipped his head to look at it. Laughing, he buried his head against the side of her neck. Tracing his fingers down over her ribcage had her arching forward toward him.

“I see the way you still look at me,” Joel slurred, nibbling at her bottom lip when she clung to his jacket. Flattening out his palm, he traced a line from her navel, over her abdomen and toward her breast. Squeezing in over her breast through the material of her bra had her cooing out. “You still look at me the same way you did when we were young. I know how you feel about me. Like I said, you were never able to hide anything from me.”

“Joel,” she panted when his fingers dropped down to open the button in her pants. She should have cared more that they were still out in the middle of a public place, but she didn’t. All that mattered in that moment were the two of them. A firm tug of the zipper in her pants had her hips pulling forward. Joel wasn’t being gentle about the way he was doing things. Locking his eyes with hers, Joel firmly pushed his hand between the material of her pants. The direct contact from the warmth of his palm had her eyes slamming shut. Caressing at the most intimate parts of her body through the thin material of her panties had Joel hissing out.

“Why deny ourselves the chance of feeling good? Of being happy?” Joel nipped at her jawline enjoying the sounds of her soft moans. Adjusting his position, he managed to get his hand beneath her panties. It had her burying her nose against the side of his neck, breathing out his name. “Let’s enjoy this moment. Act like we’re young again, running off together.”

Words were hard to form with how her body was reacting to Joel’s touch. Lowering her hand down, her fingers curled firmly around Joel’s wrist when she felt the roughness of his fingertips circling her clitoris. Dropping her head back against the car opened up her neck to allow his wet kisses to cover it. Involuntarily, her hips started to move against the sensations that he was building up inside of her.

It was then the sound of a car door closing in the distance was heard. A wet sound followed with Joel pulling his mouth away from her neck. Instantaneously, Joel pushed forward to hide what he was doing in case someone walked by them. Thankfully, he could see that the person was far out in the distance. Continuing with his caress had fear flooding into her eyes with him not stopping. There was no stopping him now that he started.

“Not out here,” she tugged on his jacket getting him to smirk. Following her toward the car, they managed to get the back door open of the SUV. Letting her get in first, Joel was quick to follow and even quicker to close the door behind him. Once they were inside, Joel was eagerly tugging at his jacket to get it off. And once he did? He was throwing it into the way back so it didn’t take up any space. Sliding forward, he helped her to get her jacket off. There was no haste to his movements. Immediately after he tossed her jacket aside, he was helping to get her sweater pulled up the lengths of her abdomen. “What if people walk by and see us?”

“They won’t,” Joel tried to assure her knowing that by her kisses, it wasn’t going to be much of a big deal for her.

Grunting out, Joel managed to get her to lift her arms so he could drop the sweater down beside them. Badly he wanted to touch her. Caress at the lengths of her body, but he was quick to reach for her bra. He wanted her. And he wanted her now. Tugging at the material of her bra, Joel got the cup down. His mouth eagerly covering the part of her breast that was revealed to him. Humming against her flesh had her crying out, her fingers sinking into his hair again.

Sweeping his tongue around her nipple allowed them to fall back into things so easily. He had always loved her breasts and enjoyed pampering them. Circling the taut nub with the warmth of his tongue had her back arching up toward him. Nibbling and sucking at the flesh, Joel’s hand pressed in over the small of her back to lead her closer to make things easier for them. Between them, her hands had dropped down working to find his belt. When she found it, she swiftly unhooked it with the material jangling. Adjusting his hips, Joel noticed that she was attempting to open his pants. They were craving each other like he couldn’t believe. She was shaking as she got the material of his jeans opened. Working with the denim she was able to dip her hand beneath his jeans to palm in over his manhood through his boxer briefs. Grunting against her breast led her to purr out which only fueled him further.

“Good girl,” he slurped at her flesh, his head tipping back just enough to watch what this was doing to her.

Chills were flooding her body with how quickly they fell into this again. With every touch, his hips would arch forward into her caress. Leaving her to feel his erection growing harder against her touch. Nipping at her flesh a final time, Joel kissed up over her breast toward her collar bone. It sent a rush throughout her body. Sliding his left hand up over the opposite side of her neck, Joel led her to him so he could kiss her more passionately. Quickly remembering the things that she liked when they were together.

A loud surprised breath escaped her lips when Joel reached down to hook his fingers into the top of her jeans. The yank had her falling back against the seat with Joel pulling her hips up toward him while he worked the material of her pants from her legs along with her panties. In the cramped space it was hard to get it off of her, having to stop to pull off her boots when he got to her feet. Tossing her pants aside, Joel curled his arms under her knees pulling her in closer to him. It was amazing just how strong Joel was and he was showing his strength with how easily he was moving her around. Urging her legs up over his shoulders, Joel lifted her hips enough to start pressing wet kisses at the inside of her thigh.

It was an awkward position for her body to be in, but with Joel’s arms wrapped around her and holding her hips in place she knew that she wasn’t going anywhere. There was a soft scratching from his facial hair at her flesh while he pampered her thighs with wet kisses, each one growing closer to her core. Bracing herself, Y/N tried to make herself more comfortable. Most of her weight that Joel wasn’t holding onto was on her shoulders while Joel had her hips lifted up for him.

Slamming her eyes shut, she felt Joel’s mouth finally cover her most intimate parts with his growl of satisfaction following once the taste of her touched his tongue. Every kiss, every flick of Joel’s tongue over her body felt so much more enhanced. It had felt like it had been an eternity since the two of them fell into one another. Maybe with the idea of being caught lingering in the back of her mind made her feel everything so much more.

It had been so long since Joel had done this. And actually enjoyed doing this. Everything he was doing showed that he was determined. Clinging tightly to her made sure that she couldn’t wiggle free while he feasted on her pussy, eating her out and having her a trembling mess in his arms. Slurping faintly at her clitoris and folds had her arching up toward him. God, he loved it. Hearing her whimpering out his name while he pleasured her did a lot for his ego. When they were together in the past she had told him that he was a greedy lover toward the end of it, so he was doing his best to focus on her and show her what he was capable of.

Shaking his head from side to side, Joel tried to add some force to his movements. Desperately she was clinging to anything on him that she could grab. Breaking away for a moment to take a breath, Joel couldn’t help but smile at the way she squirmed. Desperate to have him go back to what he was doing.

Licking his lips, Joel lowered her slightly keeping his left hand still hooked around her while his fingers caressed at her sensitive bundle of nerves. Focusing on her entrance, Joel suckled and licked listening to her panting with the combined sensation of what he was doing. Prodding his tongue inside of her, Joel slurped at her body. Following was one of the most intoxicating moans he had heard in a very long time. Cries filled the SUV with him incredibly focused on getting her to an orgasm. And by the way that she was tensing up in his grasp? He could tell that she was close. Soon her hips started to rock against his movements, his mouth finding its way up to her clit. Focusing on and teasing it with his talented mouth.

And there it was, the repeated cries of pleasure once he got her to an orgasm. Having her hips shaking against him made him realize that he was perfectly capable of pleasuring her. Allowing her to lower her hips to the seat, Joel started to work open the buttons of the green flannel that he was wearing. How loud her breathing was showed him just how much he worked her body up with what he had done.

“You feeling good?” Joel wondered pushing the material of his shirt to the sides to reveal his torso to her. Truthfully? He didn’t need her to answer that question. He knew that she felt good. It was evident in every part of her body. She was already drunk on him and it turned him on so much.

Starting at her hip, Joel dragged his fingertips up over her side, under her rib cage and then cupped at the underside of her breast. Sweeping his thumb over the swell of her nipple had her arching up toward him and he hummed.

Realizing that her breathing was heavy, she just gave Joel a nod with her back arching up toward his touch. It was then she remembered something that Tommy said to her earlier in the day. Joel liked to be dominated. And she was letting him control every part of this.

Using the strength that she had, she lifted up pushing her hands into the center of Joel’s chest. Grunting out, Joel fell back against the door. Surprise filled his chocolate-colored eyes with her crawling in closer to him. Bracing his back against the door, Joel’s breathing grew louder with the way she looked. Fuck, her taking charge like that was incredibly hot. Hell, he was impressed. She had fire to her when they were younger, but toward the end of their marriage she had grown pretty relaxed and open to whatever he wanted. This? This was hot.

Hissing out with her fingers curling around his throat had his head tipping back against the door. A chill ran right through him with a wince falling from his throat. Pressure was being applied to the soft, fleshy part of his throat with her thumb as she moved in over him.

“You are so fucking hot,” Joel slurred, biting down on his bottom lip with her hovering her mouth just over his. She was teasing him, but he loved it. Attempting to press in closer to her to bring their lips together had her shoving him further back against the door.

Working his opened shirt down his shoulders, she purposely made the material get stuck near his biceps so he would have a hard time moving his arms in any fashion. His eyebrows furrowed, his chest falling and rising faster with his breathing growing louder.

Putting a bit more pressure at his neck had Joel wincing out, but something flooded into his eyes. Desire. It was burning in his veins when she forcefully lowered down to bring their lips together in a kiss that took her breath away. Joel was hungry. Passionate and it was all the things they had been missing in their relationship at the end. Kissing down over his jaw, her fingers remained around his throat until she reached his chest. Nibbling at his flesh, she allowed her fingers to slip from his neck down over his chest. It caused him to hiss out when she pinched at his nipple, but he arched in closer to her. Kissing down over his stomach, she took her time between her wet kisses and the tiny bites she left over his body. Once she got to his pants, she tugged them firmly down to his knees hearing him grunt. There was something in the way he was looking at her that had chills flowing down her spine. It had been a long time since Joel looked at her like that.

Stealing a glance at the dark green and red boxer briefs that were clinging to Joel’s erection made her smile, “Very festive.”

“That wasn’t purposeful,” Joel snorted, amused that they could still giggle about something as simple as that in the heat of the moment.

Lowering her head down she teased kisses over the material. Kissing over the shaft of his manhood had his hips bouncing up toward her, but she used a bit of force to push them down back into place. After a few more kisses, she reached for the black waistband of the boxer briefs to pull them down his hips and to his thighs. With a smacking sound, Joel’s erection rest against his lower abdomen. Tracing her fingertips over his shaft had his eyelids growing heavy. God knows how many times they had sex together, but the sight of Joel’s cock always took her breath away.

Keeping her eyes hooked on his for a moment longer, she started pressing feather like kisses over the shaft hearing his groan follow. They were wet, hot kisses that had his breathing getting louder. Curling her fingers around the base of his cock allowed her to start stroking over his flesh, sheathing him in her grasp. Teasing the flesh of Joel’s uncut, girthy cock in her hand had him groaning with his hips slightly arching up toward her.

“Be a good boy for Christmas this year, Joel,” she slurred, lowering down to drag her tongue across the tip having him hiss out. “Let me control this for a few.”

With a nod, Joel knew she was asking him to let her do her thing. Her lips were wet with her tongue flicking out slightly with every kiss. Watching her closely had Joel’s heart racing in his chest. More than anything he wanted her to take him into her mouth, but she was purposely holding off. Each caress of her lips over the ridges of his cock grew stronger and wetter. It had his length twitching with anticipation and she smiled. Finally taking him between her lips had him moaning out. It was a surprise since Joel was never much of a verbal lover. So she enjoyed hearing it. It was quiet, but it was loud enough to hear. It had her shuddering with excitement, the heat at her core aching. Unhurriedly, she lowered her head over his length, taking only a small amount. That alone had him inhaling sharply. Dragging her tongue along his flesh drew him to wiggle, but he couldn’t move much with his shirt locked at his arms like she had done it. Each drop down of her head had her taking him farther back into her throat. It was teasing him, but he seemed to like it. Pulling back with a wet sound, she caressed her palm over his flesh before lowering down to pepper kisses near the base toward his testicles.

“Shit,” Joel hissed out, his eyes slamming shut when she took her time focusing fully on him. When she started to kiss up over his hip toward his abdomen, he felt like he was breathless and his eyes were locked on her every movement. “You want me to beg, don’t you?”

“It wouldn’t hurt,” she smirked, looking up just enough for Joel to drop his head back with a grunt. “What do you want?”

“Please just suck my cock,” Joel begged of her eliciting a smile from her lips. Giving him a nod, she got more comfortably in over him. Curling her fingers around the base, she dragged her tongue across the tip. Forcing himself to keep his eyes open, he watched her closely with her lips wrapping around the tip. Exhaling heavily, he was glad that he did ask for it because she did exactly what he wanted. Her head lowered down slowly with a wet sound before pulling back up. Circling the sensitive tip with the warmth of her wet tongue before lowering down again. Each movement grew faster having his lips part. “That’s it…”

Watching her pleasuring him was intoxicating. Not only did it feel good, but it looked like she was enjoying herself. And that to him was so incredibly sexy. Doing as she asked, he let her have her way with him. But he had nothing to complain about, it felt good with her head bobbing over his length in steady movements. By the time she pulled her mouth from his manhood with a wet sound it had him moaning out.

Crawling in over him, she was careful in the way she moved. Getting her bra off of her completely, she dropped the material to the side. It felt nice to have Joel looking at her like this. And it fueled her. “You are so fucking hot.”

Smirking, she reached with her left hand to grab Joel’s hands in hers forcing them back over his head against the glass window. Keeping them braced there she reached between them with her other hand. Rocking her hips forward had the length of his shaft teasing through her wet slit and he winced out. When the tip teased over her clitoris it had her cooing with the sensation. Lining up their bodies, she took her time in lowering down over him. It had been a while for her so even though she was being dominant, she was going to take the time to let her body open back up to the man beneath her.

It was obvious that Joel wasn’t used to her taking charge. At least not for a long time. As she took all of him into her, bottoming out, it had his head lifting from the door. Staring down at their bodies, Joel’s lips parted and he groaned. It was short lasted before his lips desperately found hers. Circling her hips allowed his body to slightly pull from hers and then go back again. It was nice to feel full again with Joel inside of her. Stretching her.

“Does that feel good?” she purred with her slow and steady movements. Starting small before growing in strength. Joel’s dark eyes were locked on her, his fingers curling into fists from where they were pressed against the window. There was something arrogant about her in the moment and he liked it. She was using his cock in the ways that she pleased. Riding him with confidence in steady, firm movements. “Does it?”

“Yes ma’am,” Joel swallowed down, pressing forward to nibble at her bottom lip. Tugging faintly at it, Joel flicked his tongue out over the inside of her bottom lip getting her to purr. Her right hand was braced against his abdomen to steady her when she lifted her hips to the tip only to bury him deeply inside of her again. Repeating those motions got Joel to be more verbal than he had been in a long time. That was what she was aiming for. It made her feel good that she could draw that out from him. Once her movements started to grow in strength, Joel wondered if someone walked by they could tell what was happening. He kind of hoped they could. Then again, she was riding him so hard he assumed the SUV was likely shaking. “So good.”

Soon she was bouncing her hips over his, her cries of pleasure filling the SUV. Watching her fucking herself on his cock had Joel’s blood boiling inside of his body with absolute euphoria. It was quite the sight and he was so glad that she actually agreed to this.

“That’s it,” Joel coached with a growl, his brow line creasing when she took all of him with ease at this point. “That’s so good. Ride that cock honey.”

Leaning in over him, she dropped his hands and they instantly went to her hips. Her right arm hooked around his shoulders, her left sinking her fingers into his thick hair while she worked herself faster over him. Burying his nose against the side of her neck, Joel gifted her flesh with wet kisses. Each forceful thrust back over his cock felt amazing. There was still a chill in the car that was around them, so that contrast of her tight canal taking him repeatedly felt phenomenal.

“Don’t…” Joel whined when she pulled her hips up and away from him. Trying to stop her from leaving, she motioned him to sit up on the seat having him huff out. Turning away from him, he helped her lower her hips back in over him in the reverse cowgirl position. Her fingers curled tightly into the flesh of his thighs. “Goddamn…”

Joel’s hands slid up her abdomen toward her breasts to cup them firmly while he kissed at the side of her neck. There was that involuntary want to bounce his hips up toward her, but she was so focused in what she was doing and how she felt that Joel just let her have her way. Dropping his fingers down, Joel’s palm pressed between her thighs. Circling her clitoris with his rough fingertips had her mewling out, her fingers digging even further into his thighs.

“You missed this, didn’t you?” Joel questioned, reaching up with his other hand to curl his fingers around her throat pulling her back against him. Quickening the motion of his fingers had her crying out with the sensation. “Brace yourself…”

Joel’s hips started bouncing up matching her movements. His testicles smacked up against her while he pounded into her matching the tempo of his fingers. Noticing her shaking, Joel knew she was on the verge of another orgasm. So he kept up at it until he heard her moaning out his name. Fuck, having her body tense up like that felt amazing. The contracting of her tight warmth that surrounded his cock was addicting.

“I missed this,” Joel alerted her, forcing her to get on her knees in the backseat. Grabbing her hips, he moved her how he needed her. Swiftly, his hips smacked up against her when he sank his length back into her tight body. Each thrust was hard having her bounce forward with a cry. “I’ve missed this ass so much.”

Joel smacked firmly over it appreciating the way her whimper followed. Watching his cock sinking into her and pulling out was a beautiful sight for him. One he hadn’t watched in quite some time. Soon his thrusts were strong leading her to crawl forward on the seat, but he reached out to press down into her shoulders to lower her face down against the leather. Sinking his fingers into her hair, he pushed at the back of her head getting her cheek to press firmly against the seat. A bright light flooded the sky making him smirk when he realized the fireworks started.

“We’ve still got a few,” Joel alerted her with a grunt, pounding into her at this point with her cries filling the air. Every hard forward thrust filled the car with a loud smacking sound. “Your sweet little pussy always took my fat cock so well, didn’t it?”

“Joel,” she muttered, her breathing growing uneven when he reached for her wrists to pull them behind her back. Collecting them in one hand, Joel’s other hand went back to keeping a pressure between her shoulders. Even though Tommy said that Joel liked to be dominated, she could tell by the way he was having sex with her that he still like having that control. “Please…”

“We’ll get you to come, don’t whine,” Joel hushed her using the strength that he had built up to continue to fuck her hard. Each smack of his hips against her ass was loud. Plunge after plunge of his cock had the wet sounds of their bodies flooding the car. It was a little uncomfortable with her face buried into the seat, her ass up and her arms behind her back. But Joel moving inside of her felt good and by his breathing she could tell he liked it. “You’re shaking. Don’t fight it.”

Breathless moans followed when he forcefully bottomed out inside of her when he felt her orgasm start. Staying still had her trying to pull her hips forward, but he didn’t allow her. Groaning out, he looked down with the light from the fireworks flooding into the car so he saw things differently. He was overstimulating her body. And he loved the way it looked and sounded.

“No one knows your body like I do,” Joel pulled out of her, leaving her a shaking mess after he brought her to another orgasm. “Lay back so you can see the fireworks. I want you to see fireworks when I come inside of you.”

Breathless, she tried to move, but everything ached. Everything was spinning, her heart was hammering in her chest. It was the best kind of hurting, but her body was shaking. A liquid warmth was still rushing through her veins, her core tremoring.

Of course Joel helped get her where he wanted her, lowering carefully down in over her. Resting himself between her thighs, Joel curled one arm around her waist to bring her up so he could sink his length back into her while the other braced against the seat. Tipping his head back, Joel bit down on his bottom lip and hummed.

“I don’t think you knew what you were capable of making me do with this pussy,” Joel admitted, lowering down in over her with her sinking her fingers into his hair. Meeting her lips in a sloppy kiss, Joel’s thrusts started again and he groaned out against her flesh. “You were always so capable of making me do whatever you wanted when we were younger.”

Hearing her moaning out his name had chills flooding his body. Bracing both of his hands on the seat, Joel’s hips eagerly bounced forward craving to reach his release knowing that the fireworks weren’t extremely long. Wincing, Joel felt his balls tightening up and he knew that he was close to coming. Having Y/N kissing at the side of his neck felt amazing when the first twitch of his cock inside of her had her whimpering against his flesh.

Continuing to kiss her through his orgasm, Joel’s hips kept up with the pace of his thrusts until he let out a final grunt against the side of her neck. Soft strokes of her fingers through his wet hair was felt. The cold inside of the car suddenly felt hot around them and smelled of sex.

“Fuck,” Joel’s breathing was loud with him pressing a final kiss against the side of her neck. It felt nice to have her touching him and holding onto him the way she was. It had been a while since someone had admired him like this. The windows were steamed over from their moment when he lifted his head and smiled. Grunting out, he pulled his hips away from her and got to his knees. She seemed to whine as his body left hers and it made him chuckle. Once his manhood hit the cold air, it twitched and he huffed loudly. Pulling her closer to him, he pushed her thighs apart and watched the way that his cum started to spill from her body. “We need to clean you up.”

Leaning over the front seat, Joel reached for the tissues and he gave a smirk when he started cleaning his release from her flesh. With a wink, Joel fell back against the opposite end of the seat. Tugging his jeans and his boxer briefs up over his hips had him sighing. “I reckon that’s the biggest orgasm I’ve had in a very long time.”

“So you liked it?” she inquired, having a harder time with working her clothes back over her body. Once she was done, she laid in over Joel and his fingers reached up to sweep at the hair that was clinging to her damp flesh. Leading her to him, Joel peppered her lips with small kisses and it had the both of them smiling.

“It was so much better than the last few times we were together,” Joel announced with a loud swallow nipping at her bottom lip. “If our sex was more like that toward the end of our marriage, we probably would still be together with a few more kids.”

Fuck. After saying that it had her tensing up over him. Cussing under his breath, he watched her head pulling back to look him over. What was once a euphoric expression now seemed to be replaced with a hurt one.

Hesitantly letting out an uncomfortable laugh, he lifted his hands in a defensive motion and shook his head, “I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Yes, you did,” she visibly caught onto the comment that while may have been innocent insinuated that sex with her was not good while they were married which is why they were no longer together. Noticing the color changing in her face, Joel swiftly started to button up his shirt realizing that this was headed in a bad direction. Some of his buttons were fucked up and he was attempting to fix them when she started heading for the door. Extending his fingers out, he firmly curled them around her wrist to stop her from leaving the SUV. “Forget it Joel. You got your fuck in, now it’s over. Obviously, you were just horny and wanted to fuck.”

“Come on,” Joel almost begged of her. He was at a loss of words. “You have to admit that when we were having sex during certain parts of our marriage it was really boring.”

Shit. That didn’t work either with her face twisting with upset, “I just mean we used to be this spontaneous couple that would get to have hot, amazing sex and then we became two parents sneaking sex in on a schedule of when we could get it. Either when the children were gone or sleeping.”

“That’s what parents do Joel,” she reminded him hearing him scoff when she pulled her wrist back from him. Reaching up, he slicked his hair back and let out an uneasy sound. “I’m sorry sex from me wasn’t good enough for you.”

“I didn’t say it wasn’t good, I just said it was boring,” Joel repeated his earlier words, throwing his hands up in the air when he started to buckle together his belt. If he would have known he would upset her this much he would have kept his mouth shut. Which really? He knew he should have done. That wasn’t the kind of thing someone would want to hear right after sex like that.

“We had sex after we got divorced too,” she pointed out having Joel shrug his shoulders and shake his head. There were times when Joel would come over to the house. Sometimes they would fight and end up having sex. Other times he would show up drunk acting sad and they would sleep together. But every time? It never brought him back. “Was that boring too?”

“I don’t know,” Joel grumbled under his breath being flustered with the way she was asking the questions. Right now her feelings were hurt and he understood that. “Maybe I just don’t remember because you weren’t the last person I had sex with. Maybe I’m confusing you with Tess. I don’t know.”

“That’s great. You’re confusing me with your ex-girlfriend. That’s just great,” her eyes were damp and Joel regretted saying what he did because he clearly upset her more than she cared to admit. It felt like he was trying to throw a jab in there reminding her that he had an ex-girlfriend that he was sleeping with. “You know you’re the last person that I slept with Joel. Before tonight. It was still you.”

“As you like to remind me. I know I’m the only man you’ve had sex with,” Joel almost mocked her hearing the offended breath falling from her throat. Whenever Joel got angry his southern drawl would grow deeper. “It’s not my fault that you couldn’t find someone else after we got divorced. Maybe you wouldn’t be so uptight if you actually got laid sometimes.”

“And there he is,” she reached up to wipe at her tears that were burning at her face. “You make me believe that there is something between us still, you lead me on, you get me to sleep with you and then the old you just comes back out. I’m so fucking stupid for thinking that you still loved me.”

“You’re taking this too personal,” Joel tried to stress reaching for her again, but she was quick to leave the SUV. Groaning out, Joel followed quickly after her, snatching his jacket and pulling it on while he stumbled on the wet snow. “Can we just talk, please?”

“The fireworks are going to be over soon and the children will be looking for us,” she sniffled, looking toward the entrance of the village knowing that their children were at the opposite end of it. Keeping a good distance between the two of them, she knew that she didn’t want to talk to him right now. “We can’t do this right now.”

“Just fucking wait,” Joel demanded, grabbing a tight hold of her wrist, forcing her back toward him as the firework show still continued in the sky. “Ellie is seventeen years old. She’s not a baby anymore. And Peter is thirteen. She can handle him. They are gonna be fine.”

“Joel,” she placed her hand in over the center of his chest trying to put some distance between them.

“I was seventeen when we got together Y/N. We were still kids,” Joel started, drawing her to listen to him when he pulled her back. This whole situation had him frustrated. “And then we got pregnant young. We married young. The two of us were all we ever really knew.”

“What are you trying to get at Joel?” she pushed struggling to get him to release her, but he wouldn’t. Right now it felt like the world was crumbling down all around her. What had started off as a hopeful moment had turned into something with a very shitty ending. “I was happy. I loved my life. You’re the one that was miserable and let me know it in every way possible.”

“I was depressed. I gave up my life,” Joel stressed, his voice growing raspier when his southern drawl grew just like it did every time he was upset. “I was the star quarterback Y/N. I was about to go off to college. I worked hard for it and then my life fell apart. I always assumed that maybe we’d break up when I went to college. We’d both go out, be young for a while and enjoy life. But my life fell to shit. I deserved that life. I know you meant well and you never gave up on me, so I never gave up on you. But not being able to do what I was destined for sucked. I could have been a sports star like Negan Smith. I could have become a singer like I wanted. Instead I got fucking stuck here in the town that I never liked to begin with.”

“You’re not the only one that didn’t get the life that they wanted Joel,” she recalled feeling an ache at the center of her chest hearing him just drop that bomb on her. “I’m just the only one that adjusted and dealt with it.”

“Yeah, but I was a sure shot,” Joel scoffed realizing that she had dreams too, but those were things she had to eventually work to try to get. He was offered a full ride to college for his skills. All he had to do was go and he couldn’t.

Tipping her head to the side, she angrily smiled and let out a tense laugh. That was his way of saying her dreams weren’t as important as his were.

Rolling his eyes, Joel let go of her arm firmly and rest his hands on his hips, “You know, I’m trying here. I’ve been a good dad. I never stopped being a good dad.”

“You’re right. You’re an amazing dad,” she stressed reaching up to rub at her arm where he had grabbed her feeling a sense of pain there. “Good for you Joel. I’m proud of you. Now please let me go get our children.”

“How are we ever going to be okay again if we can’t talk?” Joel called out when she went to leave again finding himself infuriated with the situation. “I’ve tried talking to you. I meant the things that I said to you. I miss the way things used to be. At the beginning of our relationship, it was so much fun.”

“Yeah, and then I got pregnant because we had too much fun,” she pointed out hearing him sigh again. “And then we had to have responsibilities. We had to be adults because we were raising a little girl. We couldn’t be that fun couple anymore.”

“I don’t regret being a father,” Joel claimed, reaching up to place his hand in over the center of his chest. “It’s the best thing in my life that I’ve done. Peter and Ellie mean everything to me. I don’t blame them at all for the things…the things that I lost in life.”

“No, you just blamed me,” she let out a whimpering breath causing Joel to drop his head down. “I’m not the person that made you have sex with me without a condom. You said that it felt better without a condom and I took the birth control like I was supposed to. It’s not my fault that it didn’t work. You did a good job hiding being miserable from the kids, but you never let me forget just how awful you thought your life was. You know what? No. I won’t say that. I’ll give you credit for the first part of our marriage. You hid it really well. It was toward the end that you let it show.”

“You know what I lost out on,” Joel reminded her, his dark eyes lifting when he shrugged.

“How could I forget? You reminded me so often,” she scoffed trying to wipe at her eyes again. Having hope for something that was never going to happen was one of the worst pains she had experienced. Hoping that something would come out of this was her problem. Hope got her a lot of heartache in the last few years and there was nothing that would change it now. “My mistake is thinking that you could ever love me again. Or that you never stopped loving me. There was a reason we got divorced. I just live in this fantasy world where I still believe that we can fix everything.”

“We can,” Joel suggested hearing her laugh and it frustrated him. “Our children hate us being divorced. If you weren’t so stubborn…”

“Dad!” a voice called out and Joel grunted when a weight jumped into his arms. Groaning out, he wrapped his arms around his son and pulled him up. Peter’s arms wrapped around Joel’s shoulders and he squeezed his arms tightly around him. In their fighting, neither of them noticed that the fireworks had stopped and people were starting to flood into the parking lot. “We were looking for you guys.”

“Sorry champ,” Joel pressed a loving kiss against Peter’s temple, his dark eyes locked on Y/N still when he braced his son in his arms. Elizabeth was approaching and Carl was with Lydia talking to her about fifty feet behind. “Your mother and I just started talking. We must have lost track of time.”

“Hey dad,” Elizabeth moved in beside Y/N who was doing her best to hide her hurt feelings from her children. It was something that she got really good at. “How about we take Carl and Lydia home and we all go out to dinner tonight? The four of us. Like we used to do after this event. We can go to that place that goes all out with the hot chocolates that we used to get. It’s been forever since we went there together. I know it stays open late. We used to have so much fun doing it.”

“That’s up to your mother,” Joel answered pointing in the direction of Y/N. He knew that she would never want to go anywhere with him right now, but it wasn’t going to be thrown on him if they didn’t go. “I’d love to go with all of you.”

“I’m sure you have better things to do Joel,” she suggested and he immediately shook his head, stroking his fingers over the back of Peter’s neck. “Things where you aren’t bored.”

“My night is free since the children were going to be with me anyways,” Joel repeated with a smirk, motioning Elizabeth closer to him. Balancing Peter in one arm, he managed to hook his other arm around their daughter to squeeze her close. “Ellie and Peter want to go, so come on…what do you say? Unless you have something better to do.”

“Liz, dad,” she corrected her father on what she wanted to be called and it had Joel huffing out. “Ellie just makes me sound like a little girl.”

“You are my little girl,” Joel grunted, nuzzling his nose against her temple. “You’re always going to be my Ellie. Your dad is old and locked in his ways.”

“I guess I’ll make an exception for you,” their daughter decided with a big smile and it hurt to see how much the children genuinely loved Joel. It wasn’t like he was abusive toward her. Just brutally honest. And they really had no idea how much he had broken her heart in the past. “Are we good to go mom?”

“Of course,” she agreed following them all into the car trying to hide her feelings by locking them deep down.

On the car ride to drop Lydia and Carl off at home, Joel outstretched his hand to place it over hers and she pulled it away from him. Trying to shut down, she stayed quiet until they were at the restaurant. Somehow she got lucky enough for them to end up in a booth and Joel hooked his arm around her shoulders while they sat at the booth. Having the children seeing them together like this was going to be bad. Especially since she could see it in their eyes when Joel kissed at her temple that they thought something was going on between them.

In the past, she would have swooned over this kind of opportunity. All she wanted over the last four years was to have Joel back. For them to be a family again. But after what he said? It just felt fake.

Even though this was his way of trying, it felt forced on her when she was upset and it made her unhappy. Pushing through dinner, she didn’t want to act miserable so she knew that she needed to talk, interact. After they had their dessert, they went home and the children wanted a movie night. Which meant they wanted to go back to her home and involve Joel. It was hard telling them no so she allowed it.

On the drive home they were quiet except for the children talking about what happened at the event. When they got home, it made her regret it because it reminded her of when they were younger coming home together as a family.

“Hey,” Joel stopped her when the children went in, grabbing a hold of the door. “Ellie, find something for us to watch, I want to talk to your mom for a second.”

“Got it!” Ellie called out while she bickered back and forth with Peter as Joel closed the door to give them some space.

“Y/N, I know I said the wrong thing,” Joel stammered from where they were standing on the porch of the home that they used to share together. With a frown, his hands went to his hips and he shifted his weight. “I have trouble saying the right thing. I know I do. Maybe tonight is a sign with me being here.”

Hearing his comment had a rush of heat flooding into her cheeks and Joel frowned, “I miss our home. I miss sleeping in my bed and I miss having you in my arms,” Joel reasoned with her and a hurt breath fell from her throat. “Maybe tonight we can try it again? When the movie is over. We can go to our bedroom. We can get ready for bed and we can sleep together. Like how things used to be.”

“Joel,” she began, folding her arms in front of her chest and lifting her head to meet the stare of the beautiful, brown eyes that she had fell in love with from the start. “It isn’t your bed anymore. This isn’t your house anymore. Your bed and your home are a block or two over with Tommy.”

Disappointment flooded his veins when she back stepped toward the door and grabbed a hold of the doorknob, turning it slightly to open it. It was then he realized how much he genuinely fucked up with what he said to her earlier.

“We can be civil with each other, but I know where this is headed. It’s headed in the same place that it is every time this happens. You are lonely. We have sex a few times. You realize it’s just the loneliness and you break my heart again. I don’t know how much of my heart is left,” she realized she sounded dramatic with the way that his eyes looked miserable while she spoke. “You can sleep on the couch after the movie is over. But in the morning, just go back home where you want to be.”

Going to open his mouth, Joel grumbled under his breath when she pushed open the door and stepped inside the home. Sure, what he said was honest, but he didn’t think it would ruin what they had been developing over the night. But once again, there was no time for them to talk because they had to be with the children instead of getting to talk things out. And that made things hard.

----

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