#and her FUCKING WOAD

[tiny-huts]

Thinking again how much I love Dahlia Legend of Drizzt. Yeah bitch murder people with a massive stick. Get their asses. Happy pride to her and her only

[littlest-w01f]

Monster

Tamlin x Reader

TAMLIN MASTERLIST

MAIN MASTERLIST

Summary: Reader sees her mate Tamlin lose himself to magic for the first time during her first Calanmai

Cw: Dark!Tamlin, vines as tentacles, corruption kink, breeding kink, erotic asphyxiation, impact play, monster fucking if you squint (don't read if you don't like it), Smut 18+MDNI

You stood outside the cave Tamlin was in, you'd been fashionably late, wearing a soft green dress that reached your upper thighs, parts of it translucent like a silk slip, and a sweetheart neckline that accentuated your breasts, it might have been the most skimpy thing you'd ever worn, a little gift for your mate, the High Lord, who was in a cave this very moment, the festivities of Calanmai about to begin.

You were surrounded by a bunch of Fae women, all looking expectantly at the cave your mate had gone in, your mate won't be who came out, The Hunter, Tamlin had called himself, would. Dark and strong magic in control of his mind and body.

The constant pull he had on your mating bond made you feel better about everything he had said, he won't be your Tamlin, he'd asked if there was anything you were uncomfortable with for him to do, it didn't feel like he would remember.

Your heart started to beat faster when you heard a growl from the cave he'd gone in, come out, he winnowed right in front of you, pure lust in his eyes, laurel leaves keeping his hair out of his painfully handsome face, he was bare-chested, painted in dark blue woads.

Things were quiet except for the beating of the drums that beat loudly, Tamlin gently caressed your cheeks with his knuckles, his claws threatening to break free before he gripped your neck, making you gasp for air and winnow you back to the cave he was in.

You groaned as your ass hit the hard ground, wincing slightly, Tamlin stalked close to you from where he was standing, nothing in him except pure lust and the need for his mate. A Hunter indeed, trapping a lovely maiden inside a cave, he was at the side of the entrance, and there was nowhere for you to run, except for deeper in the cave, not that you wanted to.

"Oh, I'm going to ruin you fully now," Tamlin groaned, walking to you like a predator stalking it's prey.

"Rough or gentle?" Tamlin growled mindlessly, a voice that didn't even seem his as he looked down your body, smirking at your dress, or rather barely a dress, "Aww, is this thin piece of fabric all for me?"

You nodded softly, "Y-yes." You bit your lips as he knelt between your legs, waiting for your answer to his former question, you were sure you could hear the sounds of leaves and vines from deeper in the cave, "Anything you want, my Lord."

You felt him shudder at the title from your lips as he pried your legs open, giving you a smile that showed his blunt canines elongating into fangs, "Rough then, for my good girl."

His words were filled with an unmistakable tone of dominance, as if he was taking control of every aspect of the situation. His hands gripped your thighs firmly. He leaned down, his breath hot on your skin. You could feel the weight of his body against yours as he whispered in your ear, "I'll fuck you so hard that you won't be able to walk straight afterward."

Before you could even reply, he bent forward, slamming his lips against yours in an aggressive kiss, his hands gripping your clothes to rip them off your body, turning your silk and lace to shreds off your body, you gasped as the cold air of the cave hit your bare body, feeling Tamlin press against you fully, leaving the paint his body had been marked him to rub against yours, your own eyes hazy from the spell of the Rite, moulding into his, submitting to him, ready for anything he had to give you.

"You look so beautiful like this," He whispered, his teeth grazing your neck, "All submissive and willing."

You whimper lightly, leaning into his lips, "Tam-" He gave you a look and you corrected, "My Lord... Please."

"Please what, princess?" He taunted her, his lips trailing down your neck to your shoulders, the Hunter breathing you in, crazed by your scent, you could feel your arousal between your legs, spread apart for Tamlin to settle in between, your cunt pulsing for even an ounce of friction.

"Give me something," You panted, sensing his hard cock, still in his pants, pressing against your inner thigh, "Please, anything."

"Oh, like this?" He asked curiously, his fingers ghosting over your clit making your hip buckle into his hand, he smiled watching you grip his hands to bring his hand closer.

He tutted, taking both your hands in his to pin them over your head with one, "Behave now, you said anything I want. And I want to make you cry." A wave of relief washed over you as he had a little mercy on you and rubbed your clit harder.

Your relief was short-lived as he pulled his hand away making you kick your feet in frustration, which earned a chuckle out of him. As you felt his warm breath against your neck, you couldn't help but tremble in anticipation. With a gentle tug, he pulled your head back by your hair, exposing your neck to his sharp teeth. A chill ran through your veins as you heard him growl, "You belong to me now, little mate. So, I can do whatever I want with you."

"Keep your hands up," He growls, bringing his hands down to spread your thighs, his teeth still on your sensitive neck as you whimper. Tamlin grunted in pleasure, his teeth sinking into your soft flesh. He bit down hard, causing a small trickle of blood to seep out from the wound. As he did so, he used his free hands to grab your breasts, twisting and pinching roughly, groping you fully. You let out a muffled cry, biting your lips, feeling the pain and the heat from his bite.

He shushed you gently, giving soothing licks to the bite mark, licking away the blood, "That's it... See, now I've claimed you fully, my precious mate." He quickly moved to bite the other side of your neck to give a symmetrical bit mark

"My Lord..." You breath, "My Tam..."

He moved to your face, a couple tears threatening to fall from your eyes as you looked up at him, his kissed over your eye lids, making your tears fall as he moved to his pants, ripping them off his body, finally releasing his painfully hard cock, it stood tall and proud, the tip glistening with precum. He grabbed your leg, pulling it upwards, exposing your wet cunt to him even more.

"Look at you liking this," He mused as you tried thrust your core anywhere, for any sort of friction, you make the mistake of bringing your hand down from where he had told you to hold them, in a blink of an eye there are vines surrounding you, growing from his magic, under his control, he face is expressionless, "I told you to keep your hand up, Princess."

You gasp, struggling as the vines he grew gripped painfully tight around your arms, pulling them up, some sneaked past your hips, holding your legs open for him.

"You don't deserve to be stretch for me," He decides with a sadistic grin, with a wave of his hands the vines flip you on your stomach and tuck your knees under, a slight pain in your knees from being slammed down, spiking your every growing arousal. "I'll take you tight." He smirked, leaning over you.

You wait in anticipation for him, to feel the nudge of him against your dripping slit but what you felt was a hand, the hand of a beast, Tamlin's beast, claws sharp and long, soft golden fur growing on his Fae arms, somewhere between completely Fae and beast, he held you by your neck in a tight grip, making it difficult for you to breath.

You jerk with a cry of pain from a resounding slap, his hand on your ass, with a force that would cause a mark, another followed on the opposite side. You were breathless and aroused, waiting for his next move when you, at last, left his tip nudge at your wet slit, grinding against him, or trying to, after being bound, vines that stalked to between your legs, a few thinner ones wrapping around your clit to tug at the neglected nub causing you to shake.

Tamlin's claws dug into your thigh, holding you tightly in place. He leaned forward, his face inches away from yours. The cave seemed to spin around you, as if they were both caught in a whirlwind of passion and lust. His voice was low and rough, like the rumble of the beast he hadn't fully let out. "Now, I'm going to fuck you until you beg me to stop."

You barely muffled the scream that erupted from your throat as he plunged into your cunt fully, a vine wrapping itself around your neck and squeezing tight to quiet you down, not giving you any time to adjust as he began a rough pace. "That's it..." He growled, purely animalistic, "Scream my name."

And you did, you screamed his name with every thrust, every whine and moan that left your lips, his name followed, your High Lord, your mate, legs shaking with the urge to cum at the pleasure of his cock's punishing pace and at the vines tugging at your clit.

"I'm gonna make you a mother," Tamlin groaned, thrusting in as far as he could, "Give you all my heirs. That's what you want, don't you?" He felt you through the bond as you nodded fast, a gentle kiss on the back of your shoulder blades seemed foreign compared to everything else as he whispered, "Cum for me, Princess."

You came hard, clenching hard around Tamlin's cock, milking his cock when he hit his high right after you, fucking his thick knot in, making yours eyes bulge out at the stretch that was pure beast. He emptied his seed in you, dropping lightly as your legs twitched, his knot keeping him in and not letting him pull out.

You both whimpered, the spell of the Rite washing away as Tamlin wrapped a gentle arm around your waist, stroking your now filled abdomen.

The vines and claws retracted as he turned you on your side, still buried inside you, "The knot is good, hm?" He kissed your hair softly. "Keeps my cum in you."

"Let go for me, dear," He gently rubbed the welts and red marks the vines and his hands had given you, lulling you to relax with a soft kiss to the crown of your head. "Rest up, there is more for tonight."

{General Taglist: @nox-ceur @lilah-asteria @paleidiot}

[zombie-bait]

We're being self-indulgent again, folks! Here's a Shadowheart 'fit inspired by Slovak Kroj. This is actually completely unrelated to the Miku art challenge going around rn lol I drew Karlach in traditional Slavic clothes months ago (also posted on here) and I'm hoping to get through all the companions at some point 'cuz I think it'd be a fun challenge for myself. I'll put some detail shots/info under the keep reading for anyone interested.

Her flower crown has night orchids in it hehe. Also I only just realized she doesn't have a lot of freckles in the real game but I added them to the last Shart fanart I did so fuck it, we're committing. (also I had to learn how to actually render a braid for this rip)

The center of her sash is designed after her headband in the game. I went for a star + plant motif for the designs to connect back to Selune/Shar. Also, in my first playthrough I got kinda annoyed with her so I only dressed her in swampy colours, gave her the wood woad shield and called her 'Swampheart' so she's a green plant girlie to me forever and always.

Here are a few of my references. I tried to play around with the visuals a bit. White, red and blue tend to be the classic colours for Kroj but I've seen some very beautiful black and green ones out there. I also think the darker colours just fit her vibe better. When working on designs like this I tend to take some elements directly from references and others I use as inspiration to come up with my own designs so I'm not just copying outfits 100%. At some point I might try drawing her in a more traditional looking Kroj but for now I had fun being a bit silly and artsy with the designs :))

[trappedinafantasy37]

Let me tell you about my first time meeting Minthara and locking myself into the grove raid

I was having a chat with someone in the comments of my fanfic where I had told them I locked myself into the grove raid on my first run. They got really curious as to how I managed that. But, my response got a bit too long, so I figured I’d kinda do a bit of a writeup and reminisce about my first time playing Baldurs Gate 3 all the way back on Christmas Day and how I raided the grove with Minthara.

And oooo boi, where do I begin! Just a massive string of first time player who doesn’t know how to look, how to listen, or how to read. To start, never found Wyll in the grove (and when I eventually did he was big mad). I have no idea how I missed him. For some reason, my dumb ass also didn’t explore north of Blighted Village. So, I never found Karlach (and when I eventually did she was big mad). I went down to the swamp and Ethel just humiliated me, so I decided to go back until I was level 5 cause she was level 5. I never found Wood Woad so I never learned of the Shadow Druid stuff. I also never found the Underdark or Grymforge until exploring the goblin camp AFTER the raid so the only thing left for me to do was the grove.

Kagha wouldn’t talk to me cause she wanted me to go to Zevlor. I don’t know how I did it, but Zevlor wanted me to kill Kagha and just refused to talk to me when I said I wasn’t gonna kill Kagha. I also never found Mol so never got the quest to steal the idol.

So, all that was left was the goblin camp. Went downstairs to find the bear in the cage, I kinda figured it was Halsin. But, I think I picked the wrong dialogue options with the goblin kids and pissed off the bear. Long story short, bear got dead. All that was left was talking with Minthara and man she scared the absolute fucking shit outta me! When she told me to tell her where the grove was, I was literally too scared to tell her no and gave her the location. Don’t know bout you, but powerful and scary women can convince me to do just about anything! I felt awful, but it felt like it was the only way to progress the grove conflict.

Then I started the raid and saw that I still had the option to turn against her. I was so excited and thought “Yay! I can still save them AND I’ll have an army of tiefling and druids.” WRONG! I had 3 tieflings and only 1 was actually worth a damn and the druids slept through their big day. Minthara swept the floor with my ass, again, and again, and again. I tried that fight for 3 hours and Minthara won the fight every time. Mind you, I was severely under leveled and was doing the raid at level 3.

I may have found Withers, but didn’t know about respecing so Shadowheart was still in her default class of Trickery Domain (WHICH IS GARBAGE), Astarion who was an Arcane Trickster (WHICH IS GARBAGE), and Bae’zel who carried our asses as best as she could. And then there was me, a Rogue Assassin who loses her biggest advantage after round 1.

In typical drow fashion, she quite literally beat me into submission and I just said, “fuck it, I’mma join her.” Easiest fight in the game, didn’t break a sweat. When I talked to her in the inner sanctum, I genuinely felt nauseous to my stomach, but I decided I wasn’t gonna reload and was live with my choices, even if they’re stupid. I told Minthara that what we did was murder and we deserve to hang for it. Then she said “Look at me” and I was hooked. She has had me in her clutches ever since.

I did the goblin party and her and I went to the chapel. I figured I was gonna get a fade to black kinda sex scene. WRONG! It has got to be the most graphic and explicit sex scene I’ve seen in a game second to Cyberpunk. I was literally in shock the whole time. And then, afterwards, I cuddled with her and she wanted to talk about my feelings and I'm all "O.o, you're supposed to be evil?" The game may have been painting her as an evil character, but that moment showed that there was so much depth to her than just being an evil character. A moment most players will never see cause most don't raid the grove. I truly wasn’t expecting to see her again in Moonrise. And when I did, I knew I had to get her outta there no matter what.

Looking back on it now, it’s interesting for me to see how many things had to go wrong in order for me to end up raiding the grove. If I had found Karlach first, it wouldn’t have happened. If I found the Underdark/Grymforge first and leveled up a bit, wouldn’t have happened. If I freed Halsin, I probably would have killed the goblin leaders (including Minthara cause I did not know about the knock out method on my first play through) and the raid wouldn’t have happened. Hell, if I had thought to lower the difficulty to Explorer it wouldn’t have happened! But I didn’t get that big brain idea until the fight with Nere, well after the grove raid.

Minthara left such a massive impression on me because I did raid the grove. It really does make me think of her line “I would have just been another casualty in your crusade against the Absolute and no one would remember me.” If I did things right, that’s exactly who she would have been and probably would have been dead in most of my playthroughs. But, instead, I fucked everything up and she most certainly wasn’t a casualty and I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forget her. When meeting her in the goblin camp, never could I have imagined relating so much to a character. Out of all the companions, I relate to Minthara the most and Karlach comes a close second.

I don’t always raid the grove, but I will never kill her under any circumstance. Her and Shadowheart are the only two companions who have survived every playthough I’ve done and will survive every future runs cause I just cannot play this game without them. And it’s all because I was a chronic dumbass and raided the grove.

[blackjackkent]

House of Grief Boss Battle Report!

Initial state of play: THERE ARE SO MANY OF THEM OH MY GOD

Yikes on bikes.

As pictured, Viconia immediately starts out by turning several of her followers into wolves, which is really pretty mean because Shadowheart has a crippling fear of them due to the memory that was implanted in her head.

Intriguingly, the source of this is a series of connected abilities she has:

Wild. I'm assuming that if we came down here without Shadowheart and Hector had gone through the Mapping of the Heart himself, this attack would be keyed to him and to something he said during the conversation.

Shadowheart is NOT HAVING ANY OF THIS BULLSHIT:

Atta girl.

>:(

Looking at Viconia's other features:

That's going to make Shadowheart's abilities as a damage dealer pretty much moot unfortunately.

Holy tankiness batman.

I'm not entirely sure if she's meant to be a paladin or a cleric here.

She has 124 hit points, which compared to some of the bosses we've fought is really not much; this is very much a mob battle rather than a single target battle. The various other Sharrans around the room range from 30 at the low end to 150 at the max. Including her, we're looking at 20 enemies.

Hector and Karlach are such battering rams that I'm not overly worried about this, but let's see how it goes.

Round 1:

Given the debuff Shadowheart has against Viconia, getting the two of them apart as soon as possible seems like it should be a top priority. With this in mind, Hector comes in with Flurry of Blows for two pushes in a row.

Given the massive number of enemies on the field, I think Jaheira's conjuring abilities are (tragically) more relevant for this fight than her owlbear form is. Conjure Woodland Being puts a dryad on the field who can themselves summon a wood woad which puts two new ally combatants on our side for the price of one. I don't expect them to last very long but they are not intended to. XD

Of course, once again, despite the two extra fighters we just brought on the field and all the other more threatening members of our party, everyone goes STRAIGHT FOR JAHEIRA and starts beating up on her.

STOP BEATING UP ON THAT OLD WOMAN, DAMN IT.

Shadowheart lands a clutch Hold Person to take one of the Justiciars out of the fight temporarily and gets her spiritual weapon on the field for another ally.

It's really disheartening watching the like ten enemies in a row go in the middle of the initiative order.

And of course Jaheira goes down again before I can do literally anything about it. Maybe I should have owlbeared her after all. (Legitimately I don't know why this keeps happening. Normally I would blame my bad combat skills but I hadn't even done anything yet.)

Speaking of bad combat skills, I decide to send the wood woad over to try and draw enemies away from her, and forget it's next to a bunch of enemies already, which all AOO and obliterate it immediately.

This is not off to a good start. None of these enemies are strong in and of themselves but they're making a lot of progress through sheer numbers. Top priority instantly becomes getting the squishy enemies out of the fight immediately.

Round 2:

Hector puts this new plan into action immediately by one-shotting two of the squishies because he is a fucking wrecking ball of a man now.

Jaheira has biffed two death saving throws in a row.

Karlach wrecks one of the wolves; turns out it's a polymorph variant and reveals the person underneath when the wolf form runs out of health. Karlach wrecks that too. XD

Shadowheart is also in VERY rough shape due to Viconia focus firing her and auto-critting everything. I have her disengage and back away from combat and then cast Mass Healing Word. Tragically, everyone is bone chilled and apparently that persists through downstate, so literally nothing happens. Fuck.

This is actually going quite badly. The Sharrans spend their turns casting Darkness on a large portion of the battlefield (which they are immune to) and surrounding Hector in a big deathball. Between Bone Chill, Darkness, and the fact that our party is almost completely optimized for single target damage (except for Jaheira, who is unconscious), things are really not looking good.

Round 3:

Jaheira dies. Shadowheart gets downed on another crit from Viconia. I reload and reconsider the situation.

Attempt 2. I have Jaheira drop all her healing spells for now since we have Shadowheart. Instead, I have her load up everything she can do that does AOE damage or CC, and cast Stoneskin on herself before the fight.

It's called fashion, look it up.

This time we're going to do our best to keep her and Shadowheart to the BACK line and just topping up Hector and Karlach as much as possible and casting AOEs. I've also loaded her up with Daylight again in the hope that it might counteract the Darkness spells.

Let's see if this goes better.

Round 1:

We kick off with Jaheira dropping an ice storm on half the field and then running back towards the door. Only one of the bad guys eats shit on the ice, but it does considerable opening damage to a number of the squishies at once.

I also have her drop a grasping vine in the very center of the arena where hopefully it can mess up Viconia's day. It's a real Dr. Seuss ass lookin' thing.

Hector one-shots one of the squishies on the opposite side of the map and makes a good start on a second.

Viconia spends her whole action obliterating the grasping vine in one go, which is much better than her obliterating Jaheira so I'll take it.

Shadowheart flamestrikes two more enemies almost off the field entirely.

While Hector runs around the arena, this time we keep Karlach on squishy defense duty for now, beating up the Justiciar who is trying to get at Jaheira and Shadowheart.

The long string of enemy turns is still disheartening but not quite as disheartening as it was last time, so that's promising. Darkness on the field again. Two of the enemies eat shit in the ice field at last. Several of them get distracted by how shiny Shadowheart's spiritual weapon is.

Round 2:

Bone chill is really quite a problem but we made it through the first round without anyone taking a dreadful amount of damage.

Jaheira casts Daylight and it does indeed remove the darkness effect!

Hector kills THREE separate people on his turn.

Viconia goes after Shadowheart again at once but this unfortunately moves her into Karlaching range.

At this point I realize two critical things: Shadowheart's Spirit Guardians can do necrotic as well as radiant damage, and (to my surprise) the Sharrans aren't resistant to necrotic damage.

Let's fucking go.

During the enemy turns Jaheira's health starts getting dire again. We also discover that Daylight only removes EXISTING darkness and doens't prevent new ones from being cast, which is annoying.

Round 3:

Hector kills Viconia and one of the Justiciars. The quest completes, but the additional bad guys definitely did not get the memo.

I had a brilliant idea about sending Shadowheart to grab Jaheira and teleport them both out of danger with Dimension Door. This fails for several reasons - Jaheira is in the midst of darkness and thus Shadowheart can't target her for the spell, and Jaheira raised a wall of Entangling Vines which do damage to Shadowheart on the way in. So they're both kind of just standing in the midst of a lot of enemies while very injured and Jaheira is bonechilled. Rawr. Shadowheart just sighs and casts Cure Wounds on herself instead. Her spirit guardians still do mega work though.

We're starting to gain the upper hand, though. Karlach manages to knock several more enemies out on her turn. This has not been a clean or professional fight but we're getting it done. XD

In a moment of unusual generosity, the enemies decide not to go after Shadowheart and Karlach, both of whom they could easily kill, and instead take potshots at Hector and Karlach who are almost full health.

LOL jk [sigh]

Shadowheart mysteriously obtains a second bonus action from somewhere and I'm legitimately not sure where.

????

Oh, it's from her helmet - she gets an extra bonus action when below 50% health. Nice!

Down to three enemies remaining, which is feeling rather more manageable, even if Jaheira dies. (*spongebob arms outstretched meme* TEMPORARILY)

VICTORY! And we didn't quite lose Jaheira. XD

I'm so good at this.

[findingtarshish]

Malkavian and Toreador for Andrasta? 💖

@scribesofcalamity

Sorry for taking so long to get to these, but thanks for the asks :D

Malkavian - Think of your OC as a mortal, pre-embrace. If someone showed them what's going to happen to them, from the night they were turned to now, would they let the embrace happen or would they try to avoid it?

FUCK NO. Andrasta was embraced by force while a phalanx of Roman soldiers slaughtered her village. She would never have asked for this, especially not the hell she went through as Michael's pet project. In additionally, as a Garou, she suffers extreme pain and depression as a result of her abomination nature. She would have much preferred to have died with her father that day.

Toreador - Describe your OCs aesthetic in the worst way possible, then tell us what it actually is.

Andrasta is in fact a toreador, so this is appropriate! Her aesthetic is basically celtic cottagecore blade. She's a big fan of body armor, duster coats, woad warpaint, and weapons. In civilian clothes, she tends to dress like a librarian, with turtlenecks, flannel ponchos, and loose pants or long skirts. She is the most unfashionable toreador, partially because she doesn't care, and partially because she doesn't want to appear radiantly beautiful (difficult considering her Stunning merit) because of her hatred of her clan.

[ladyhatty]

Episode 1 Pt. 3

-my back also requires 20 husbands worth of spousal backrubs -for a second thought they'd got a chest of woad -reconciliation was just going to be 2 dudes completely fucked off their gord on different drugs -That yellow dress and her hair half up, Jackie rolls out of bed the hottest one on the island -SOMEONE HUG FANG -"we're really in it now tiny Stede" (genuinely thought he was going to bite it's head off) -that was a very busy first episode. hope things can chill out now -Still no Lucius I'm going to go cry

[whispering-depths]

my sibling came to visit me this weekend and we continued our bg3 honor mode multiplayer playthrough (^ this is my honor mode oathbreaker paladin/warlock, minerva. she broke her oath because we let auntie ethel live)

we are now 20 hours in, done with most things in act 1 including the underdark, but we did *severely* fuck up the goblin/grove situation, and we don't know if we can now salvage it. but here's what happened:

first we killed everyone in the goblin camp courtyard by poisoning the alcohol and picking off everyone who was left. relatively easy

I was going to drink priestess gut's sleeping potion and then let korilla take care of her for us, but... I forgot that as a half-elf my tav can't be magically put to sleep, lol. so gut attacked us, and this fight ended up being WAY more difficult than it needed to be because we were underleveled and half the goblins outside the room got involved as well as the zhent traders, and now they're all dead too. oops. but at least we are alive

then, later on, here comes mistake #1. we tried to keep minthara alive by stealing something, making her temporarily hostile, and knocking her out. that all seemed to work. since were were out of spell slots entirely and quite low on healing potions, we long rested before taking out dror ragzlin and freeing halsin. DO NOT LONG REST, we have learned

both of those fights go off relatively easily, we took out dror ragzlin in like 2-3 rounds and then halsin's fight goes off without a hitch.

then, we ask halsin to join us in our party. I think this was when we realized we had made a mistake. all of the goblin leaders are "dead" (or knocked out, in minthara's case) but halsin won't let us leave the camp because he says we have unfinished business.

we try to see if minthara got back up since we long rested, but it turns out she just completely despawned, probably set off on her way to moonrise in the nude. sazza is still there, alive, because we had knocked her out too, but when we go to talk to her it triggers a cutscene conversation *with minthara* despite her being nowhere to be seen outside of the cutscene. we try to kill sazza permanently and see if halsin will let us leave now, but he still angrily tells us we have unfinished business. so we ask him to stay while we go do other things. he's mad but stays put while we say peace out and leave

we go to the grove to see if, maybe, we can resolve the conflict on that end. we talk to zevlor, investigate kagha in the swamp, fight some mephits and wood woads, lose an eye, fight auntie ethel, expose the shadow druids, kill kagha anyways, steal the idol... but still, nothing. we cannot progress to the tiefling party unless we "kill" minthara, who no longer exists, as far as the game is concerned.

so we are at an impasse. we can't choose to turn on the grove now because minthara disappeared and everyone in goblin camp is dead, and we can't get halsin to leave the camp and come to the grove because he doesn't believe us that everyone is dead.

we can't trigger the tiefling party to advance either of our romances (not the biggest deal in honor mode but lol I'm still trying to hold out hope on romancing astarion and despite having high approval he still hasn't propositioned me. we did manage to miss the bite scene early on and he confessed his vampirism voluntarily when we got to the underdark, so maybe it's not possible to romance him now? idk, I'm not really sure how that works. I still have gale as my backup stay-at-camp wife though)

so now, our only option seems to be to proceed into the mountain pass/act 2. this is just speculation, but I am guessing that we will lose halsin which will make us unable to cure the shadow-cursed lands, and I am guessing we will probably lose the tieflings too since we didn't technically *resolve* the goblin conflict and the road to baldur's gate isn't "safe" for them?

ugh. pain

I do not want to restart this

an additional funny element -- my sibling's light cleric has a seemingly permanent enemy of justice condition for having killed a goblin camp guard. it's stuck around for at least two long rests now, and we don't know if it will ever go away. they might just have to use disguise self anytime we are around goblins from now on, lol.

all of this because we wanted to save the hot drow lady. godsdammit.

moral of the story, as best I can tell: if you are going to attempt a minthara rescue/redemption mission, don't do it on honor mode. don't long rest, and don't let halsin join your party on the way out of camp

[revcleo]

imho might be easier unless people are copying from relevant corpses like the Ukok Princess (meaning if you're intending to represent her culture) if people just go a bit more wild, like don't try and make historic tattoos realistic unless you're going to go 100% accurate because it just ends up misrepresenting something from somewhere.

put like circuit boards on people, give people a selection of modern logos, put cool dog on someone, use unowns from pokemon to spell out "fuck".

like even if you don't want it to be easily recognisable as something modern there's some sort of symbol you can borrow from somewhere where it doesn't matter at all, like kingdom hearts

though honestly I think that there's a bit of an issue with people representing peoples of the past wearing tattoos as more primitive or wild or something, like while there is debate over woad painting (it is entirely possible to do) it's probably a good idea to think like, "do I need to use tattoos or body paint to depict people of the past or in my fantasy world" like if you are just putting hunters in body paint but not mages what are you coding your body paint as?

People, and especially white people, need to be very careful with the kinds of tattoos they depict on their characters’ bodies and faces. So many things attributed to the ‘fantasy’ genre are directly lifted from Indigenous peoples. Vikings (a job title, not even a culture) did not have a tattooed line running down their chins. Fantasy characters do not need to have improvised, mix and match ‘tribals’ stretching across their biceps for sex appeal or really any reason if you do not come from the cultures those markings stem from. Even people working with their *own* ancestral tattooing ‘designs’ need to be mindful and careful of how they depict their culture. Exhausting.

[lavellander]

🚫 dont rb pls 🚫 but shaming myself into starting things n peer pressure r good things actually 

[xxgoblin-dumplingxx]

Hiii, I don't know if your requests are open or not. I tried to see if they are but I couldnt find it. In case they are could we get some Neighbor!Jason or badman!Jason? Whatever you feel like writing! If your requests aren't open, just ignore me... and sorry 🙂

"How are things with your neighbor?" Dick asked, taking a pull from his beer.

Jason felt his cheeks heat and he shrugged, "Fine I-"

"Ohhh things got heated on movie night didn't they?"

"No," Jason mumbled. "It's not like tha-"

"Did you hear her masturbating and saying your name?" Dick grinned, sensing the potential to embarrass his little brother like sharks sense blood on the water. "Jason, yes. Right there," he moaned with an affected breathy whine.

"She sent me a nude on accident," he snapped, frustrated.

"No one sends-"

"Well considering she won't even look at me right now without getting tongue-tied and running away. Yeah. She sent it on accident."

"Ouch," Dick said wincing. "Was it at least good?"

Jason can only groan, thudding his head on the table gently. Dick had a way of making him cop to things no one else could get out of him, even under torture. "It was the hottest fucking thing I've ever seen."

"Better than Kiera Knightly in King Arthur?" he asked,only half teasing. Why that had been Jason's sexual awakening was anyone's guess. He wasn't sure if it was the leather or Kiera herself but- he knew the crush persisted. And his little brother's answering groan made him snort. If you supplanted Guinevere covered in woad tattoos and blood, either his tastes had evolved or you were his own walking goddess of love. "What's she doing tonight?"

"She's going to a sentencing hearing- she should be in the air by now."

Dick frowned a little, "Sentencing?"

"For her brother," Jason said nodding. "Murder rap in a death penalty state."

"Jesus-"

Jason sighed, "When she gets back tomorrow I'll be lucky if she'll even answer the door- but. If worse comes to worse maybe I can loosen a bolt under the sink. Or go put her sugar where she can't reach it."

"Solid plan," Dick chuckled. "Think she'd wear the armor if you asked her-"

"Fuck you."

[strangerobsession]

Had fun with an incorrect quotes generator with the ST crew and my OC. Enjoy the madness.

Try it yourself!

Eddie and April

April: Is something burning? Eddie, leaning seductively on the counter: Just my desire for you. April: Eddie, the toaster is literally on fire.

. . .

Eddie, sweating: April, there's something I need to ask you- April: Finally, you're proposing! Eddie: How'd you know? April: Eddie, you've dropped the ring five times during dinner. April: I even picked it up once.

. . .

April: When you said 'Magic in Bed', I wasn't expecting this.... Eddie: *pulls out card from deck* Now, was this your card? April: Holy moly-

. . .

April: Since we're in a relationship now, your clothes are my clothes too. Don't ask me why I have your shirt on, this is our shirt. Eddie: Fine, but when I come strutting in with your fuzzy socks I don't want to hear shit.

. . .

Eddie: You are the love of my life and I would do anything within reason to make you happy. April: I would be happy if you ate, stayed hydrated and got a reasonable amount of sleep. Eddie: I said within reason, April. How about I murder that guy? April: So murder is in reason but proper self care isn't? Eddie: Well, duh. What kind of question is that?

. . .

Eddie, April, Gareth and Jeff

Jeff: I'm cold Gareth: Here, take my hoodie. *meanwhile* Eddie: I'm cold. April: I can't control the weather, Eddie.

. . .

Gareth: Do you love April? Eddie: Yeah, I do. Gareth: Jeff! I told you I knew it! You owe me 100 bucks! Jeff: We all love April. You should've asked if he was IN love with her. Eddie: I thought that was implied. Jeff: ... Gareth: ... Eddie, looking straight at Jeff: Congrats Gareth, you just won 100 bucks.

. . .

Eddie: ARE YOU- Jeff: Fucking. Eddie: KIDDING ME?! YOU- Jeff: Fucking. Eddie: IDIOT! Gareth: ...What was that? Jeff: April banned Eddie from swearing, so I'm helping him out.

. . .

April: I love you. Eddie: I love you too. I've waited so long to hear you say that. *April and Eddie kiss passionately* Jeff, to Gareth: You owe me 20 dollars.

. . .

*Everyone is playing a board game together* Eddie: I will put 'A' down to make 'A'. Gareth: I will add onto your 'A' to make 'AT'. Jeff: I will add onto your 'AT' to make 'RAT'. April: I will add onto your 'RAT' to make 'BIOSTRATAGRAPHIC'. Jeff: *flips the board*

. . .

Eddie, April, Steve, Nancy and Robin

Steve: You're a lying piece of shit! Eddie: Oh yeah! You're the idiot that thinks you can get away with everything you do, WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD! Nancy: I'm leaving and I'm taking Robin with me! April, gathering cards: Aaaaand that's enough Monopoly for today.

. . .

Nancy: Guys... the principal just called- Robin: It was April! April: It was Steve! Steve: It was Eddie! Eddie: It was me!

. . .

April: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast? Steve: Several traffic violations. Robin: Three counts of resisting arrest. Nancy: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks. Eddie: Also, that's not our car.

. . .

Eddie: April's first detention, I'm so proud. Steve: Woad, back up. Why did she get detention? Nancy: Because she's an idiot. Robin, terrified: She can do that??

. . .

Robin: Poison is a magic transmutation potion that turns people into corpses. April: This knife is actually a magic wand. Eddie: Meet me in the Denny's parking lot for a wizard duel. Nancy: *cocks gun* Magic missile. Steve: What the fuck is wrong with you people.

. . .

April, Eddie, Dustin, Mike, Lucas and Erica

Dustin: Just be yourself! Eddie: Really? Dustin, I have one day to win over April's parents. Eddie: How long did it take for you guys to like me? Mike: Couple of weeks. Lucas: Six months. Erica: Jury's still out. Eddie: See Dustin! 'Just be yourself' what kind of garbage advice is that?!

. . .

April: Eddie is too tall for me to kiss him on the lips. What should I do? Dustin: Punch him in the stomach. Then, when he doubles over in pain, kiss him. Lucas: Tackle him! Erica: Dump him. Mike: Kick him in the shin! Eddie: No to all of those! Just ask me to lean down!!

. . .

*after the Squad has been separated for a few years* Dustin: So, what have you been up to lately? Eddie: Leading a revolution with April. Dustin: Good for you! Me, I've joined the mob. Eddie: *nods* Oh, how cool! That's awesome! Dustin: I know! Anyway, have you heard from the others? Lucas? Eddie: Happily living as a hermit in the woods. Mike? Dustin: Wrongfully locked up in an asylum, which reminds me, we need to break them out later. Erica? Eddie: Cult leader. Dustin: Yeah, that sounds about right.

. . .

Erica: Dumbest scar stories, go! Dustin: I burned my tongue once drinking tea. April: I dropped a hair dryer on my leg once and it burned. Lucas: I have a piece of graphite in my leg for accidentally stabbing myself with a pencil in the first grade. Mike: I was taking a cup of noodles out of the microwave and spilled it in my hand and I got a really bad burn. Eddie: I have emotional scars.

. . .

April: Bye Eddie! Bye Erica! Bye Mike! Buy Dustin! Bye Eddie! Lucas: You said 'bye Eddie' twice. April: I like Eddie.

[raedear]

Same airport question. Death is not an option.

Merrick, Kozak, or Booker?

Booooo

MERRICK: English cunt, would definitely spend the entire time watching him from under my hair silently judging him and making faces at him/about him. If he spoke to me the Scottish in me would explode like Bruce Banner turning into the Hulk; I'd manifest blue woad and fury

KOZAK: Kozak I feel wouldn't be immediately obvious as a monster, so it would be my own knowledge of her amorality that would work against us there. If I didn't know that we'd just exist quietly near each other while waiting, she seems like the kind of person who would actually think they're very kind, so she would probably watch my bag for me if I had to pee, but wouldn't hesitate to experiment on me

BOOKER: right. Here's the thing with booker. Booker and I would get along like a house on fire IF he hadn't betrayed his friends. I can deal with a lot, but what I cannot forgive is a traitor or a grass. You can annoy me any number of terrible ways and eventually we will be pals again, but if you grass me in for something or if you fuck me over like that, or I know you've done it to someone else, we're fucking done. He lies in their fucking faces and I cannot forgive that. However. If I did not know that about him, or if we met prior to it occurring? He's just a French guy who likes forging shit and books. I vibe with that

weirdly here I'd probably choose Kozak

[inky-duchess]

Fantasy Guide to Hair

Hair is one of the facets of the characters' look as well as worldbuilding. Hair has always been important to many cultures such as the Vikings and Native Americans. So here is the Fantasy Guide to hair @cat-inthe-corner

Hairstyles

I am always asked what styles historical women wore. The truth is we can't exactly know for sure. Besides, if you spend your time describing a character's hairdo you will put your audience to sleep. Really you can paint a vague picture for your audience and that'll do.

Down and unadorned: Girls of every class wore their hair down to show they were unwed. Married women always wore their hair up and covered it. Only prostitutes wore their hair down and uncovered.

Braid/Plait: Braids were an easy tidy away hair. Braids were pinned to the head and set under headdresses. Braids lasted longer that any other hairstyle.

Wigs: Some historical women and men wore wigs. Wigs were seen as cleaner and easier to maintain. The Egyptians shaved their heads and wore wigs. The Renaissance revived wigs. Wigs were rather gross and most wearers carried long pins to scratch their heads.

Bob: The humble bob was a popular haircut throughout the Mediaeval period for men. Bobs came back into fashion in the 20s for women seen as a daring rebellion against the patriarchy.

Historical Hair Care

Women have been obsessed with having perfect hair for centuries. Women have always sought to find anything to help make their hair smoother, curlier, bigger and shinier.

The Egyptians often used castor oil and almond oil on their hair. It smoothed their hair as well as protected it. The Egyptians were rather into wigs and to keep them smelling fresh, they melted soft perfumed wax comes onto the wigs.

Tudor and Elizabethan women would use animal fat or lard in their hair. It would keep the hair in the shape it was teased into (historical hairspray) as well as smooth it. However, it drew lice and flies and must have smelt ghastly after a few days.

Assyrian women and men curled their hair by using hot iron bars and oil. Sound familiar? This was the predecessor of the curling iron (or as I call it-that-very-hot-stick-my-sister-leaves-on-the-table).

The Ancient Indians oiled their hair to prevent baldness which is still used today in parts of India.

As hair was not often washed in the 17th & 18th centuries, people turned to powders and pomades. The powder were made of flour and starch to soak up grease from the hair. Pomades were to make the hair smell nicer.

A popular conditioner of the times was made from bacon fat. Since women didn't want to go about smelling like breakfast, the fat was often cut with rosewater or lavender or another scent.

Women would have combed their hair with brushes and lice combs. Most women pre-19th century would keep their hair styled for days or weeks on end. After the 19th century, women began to brush and comb their hair regularly.

Mediaeval women washed their hair with soap made from animal fat mixed with ashes and vinegar.

Victorian/Edwardian women often washed their hair with eggwhites to get shinier hair. The Empress Sisi famously had a head of gorgeous hair which she was obsessed with. “Every three weeks it was washed with raw eggs and brandy, a procedure which took an entire day, including drying. After washing her hair, the Empress would don a long, waterproof silk dressing gown and walk up and down until her hair dried.”- Ludwig Merkle.

Dye

Hair was dyed throughout history just like it is today. Some colours were easily found, some not.

Blonde hair was the most desirable colour for Mediaeval/Renaissance women. Blonde hair was often obtained by using a concoction of olive oil, white wine, alum. Other ways of obtaining blonde locks involved using saffron, tumeric and skins of onions. It could also be washed with limes and dried in the sun.

Red hair was not a popular hair colour in mediaeval times but it became popular after Elizabeth I. The Romans often scalped Celts to make wigs from their hair. Red hair could be made from using Henna which is orange in colour.

Brown hair can be obtained by mixing indigo and henna. It is not permanent but can be after a few rinses. This is likely what Sansa Stark is currently using in ASOIAF. (Green hair like Wylla Manderly's would be obtained by either fucking up a dye job or mixing the blonde with blue.)

Blue hair if you want to go wild could likely be made from woad leaves and blackcurrants skins.

Accessories & Headresses

Pins: Most hair pins looked rather like pens. Hair would be wrapped about it and then pinned up on the head of the wearer, really not so different to bobby pins today. Pins were a favourite gift to give women of most time often made of wood, ivory, metal and were worn by ladies of all classes.

Ribbon: Ribbons were used by both classes. Thin strips of material would be woven through the hair in order to keep it neat as well as look great. Upper classes had the ribbons made of silk and other fine fabrics.

Feathers: Feathers were worn in all time periods. Elaborate towering do's were often graced with plumes to add extra height.

Headbands: Headbands have been about for years throughout most of civilization. From slim ribbons across brows to jewelled headbands of the 20s, headbands were a simple yet classic look.

[avelera]

Fun facts I’ve learned from LARPing* a character who wears Celtic woad war paint:

^^ it me! Basically, considers this one part costume/LARP makeup tutorial and one part archaeological study via performance art. (Photo Credit)

(*LARP stands for “Live Action Role Playing” aka, Dungeons and Dragons but you run around in the woods in full costume as your character and yes that means you stay in-character for hours and have to perform all the combat yourself.)

- If you ever see a character with complex war paint on their body, back, or dominant arm that is at all graceful and not just slapped on pigment, then they must have had a friend do it for them. So any surly loner type figure that ALSO has elaborate warpaint is a fucking joke. You literally can’t have warpaint be symmetrical or pretty in places you can’t reach without having an available group of companions and, better yet, artistically inclined friends to put it on for you. War paint would have, by necessity, been a communal activity with group members putting on war paint for one another before going into battle, especially before the invention of easily accessible, high quality mirrors.

Addendum: war paint takes quite a lot of time to apply if you want it to be pretty or symmetrical. I regularly have to clean it all off and start over if I want symmetry and that’s with a mirror and a high-quality paint brush. A warrior that wears elaborate war paint but “doesn’t care about his/her appearance” is a goddamn liar. Unless you are with a group of warriors who are putting your makeup on for you, you do care about your appearance and you are very delicately applying makeup for just as long as a YouTube makeup star, at minimum. It’s a very ego-driven look with a lot of artistic skill required either by you or someone else. Even just making the appearance of a simple straight line on your face can be quite hard since your face has curves and bumps all over it. To do delicate lines takes forever. I chose bold strokes to make it easier and even those take a long time to apply if you’re in a hurry. A warrior who is wearing detailed war paint must have had at least an hour putting their face on to look pretty for the big fight, and don’t let them tell you otherwise.

(Sorry, Kassandra, your warpaint doesn’t make any f-ing sense unless a member of your crew put it on for you.)

- Brightly colored paint on your face will make your eyes look beady and small unless you cake dark eyeliner or pigment around your eyes to make them look bigger. It’s the main difference between good looking war woad pictures (usually on women) and bad looking woad pictures (usually on men) because they don’t remember to put eyeliner on so the colored paint doesn’t drown out their eyes. Even in video games, the best looking and most iconic war paint (like Senua or Kassandra) makes sure to cover the area around the eyes with paint, otherwise the eyes look beady and small. Case in point:

Not to call out real people, but this pic was on the internet. Notice how his blue eyes are drowned out by the pigment, making them look smaller, compared to when there’s pigment around the eyes so that doesn’t happen. By contrast:

^^^ Here, the black pigment around the eyes keeps her eye color from being drowned out by the bold blue. As a final example:

- Fun fact about war paint: that shit transfers everywhere and I mean everywhere without a binding agent of some kind. You’re not wearing war paint with your best silks. Wearing it naked into battle actually makes a lot of sense, as does permanent tattooing instead of temporary paint.

- War paint is actually intimidating as fuck. I’m quite a petite woman (5′4″, 130 lb) but I’m also a fight junky. I knew I was going toe-to-toe with guys twice my size and I wanted to be taken seriously as a warrior, not brushed off as small or cute. And boy howdy, did the warpaint work. And this is why:

- War paint disguises you. It basically works like extreme contouring in that it literally transforms your face. I’ve LARPed across from people for actual years who didn’t know who I was after when I took the paint off. It’s because the brain just registers the paint as my features to them, because most people don’t look at bone structure when recognizing others. It allowed me to build a myth around my character as an intimidating fighter that I could never have built around my normal features. It made my character a truly different person from me, one people only associated with who they see on the battlefield. 

Anyway, thank you for coming to my rambling TED talk, I hope you enjoyed!

[chaoticintellectual]

i fucking love our gardeners today i chatted with one of them who saw me spinning and offered to get me some woad or indigo she grows in her garden for dyeing