#and he went from being very popular (im SURE he was; hes called a track STAR)
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samarecharm · 8 months ago
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Ryuji is so anxious in the beginning of the game :( hes so caught up in his head during the kamoshida arc; makes me think hes been like that for awhile, at least until u get a bit further in the game. The rumors, the self loathing, the whole stint w kamoshida; hes got too much on his brain and its kinda nice (and a little sad) that he starts sharing those anxieties and doubts the second hes in a safe space to do so.
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desire-mona · 4 months ago
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good. so basically what's been happening is hes now hosting this game show on amazon prime called "beast games" where people compete for money.
contestants were told that this game would be like the show squid games, and that all of the challenges are going to be fair game between everybody (people of multiple age groups were competing.) what the challenges ACTUALLY were were very physical activity based, and usually relied on speed and strength from what I remember rosanna pansino saying. 
oh yeah rosanna pansino (the girl who did nerdy nummies if u dont know) has been keeping track of this stuff on her tiktok, its worth looking at if you're invested. im paraphrasing a lot of this so definitely go look at her videos for something more eloquently said.
so most of the people that were succeeding in these challenges and had the highest chance of winning a big sum of money were able-bodied people. a lot of those ppl took advantage of that, as well as the fact that a lot of these challenges were unregulated in terms of moderation? like they could get away with a lot and go unscathed, i think it's because after the first challenge thing, the footage of whatever was going on wasn't going to be checked for any foul play or what have you. anyway, they took advantage of their advantage and started knocking down their fellow competitors and using force to win whatever the fuck. a lot of the people who got knocked down were injured, im not sure to what extent, but medically it gets a lot worse than that.
medications were being withheld from competitors, one of which allegedly caused a seizure on the playing field? and it took several minutes for any medical personnel to get to the scene. if i remember correctly, somebody was not allowed a benadryl while they were having an allergic reaction.
food and water was being withheld too, people were being fed at inconsistent times, sometimes more than 12 hours apart if i remember correctly. a lot of what people got fed was not enough nutritionally, i think a lot of it was mr beasts feastable chocolate bars? people had to hoard food because they didn't know the next time they were being fed. the conditions were really fucking bad, and the people that didn't win the games were essentially given hush money before they went home so that they wouldn't talk publicly about that unsafe conditions that they were in. mind you, we aren't talking about a lot of money, we're talking about an initial amount of $1000, and after a large enough amount of people refused to take that money, they raised it to a whopping $2000.
and to top it all off, people weren't properly given the flight home that they were promised on time due to the amount of people that were being flown home. i guess. the flights were delayed by a few days, but a lot of these people had work so that wasnt a viable option. one person that sent their experience to rosanna said that they had to pay for their entire flight home since they had work, they were apparently promised reimbursement money but they have no idea when that will be in their hands.
i feel the need to say that a lot (if not all) of this is alleged to my knowledge, a lot is still being figured out and confirmed so i won't take any chances. 
i think it's cheesy to say something like "i always had a feeling about (youtuber)" but this is one of those cases where i did sort of know ahead of time. tho i may be biased, cuz ive known of him since he used to make cringe compilations of kids' youtube intros back in 2015, drinking bleach jokes, cancer jokes, the like, and i hold a grudge so automatically i didnt like him. around 2019 to 2020-ish is when he started to rise in popularity due to the giving nature of his videos, it started out with him giving big donations to small streamers i think, and it turned into random challenges to win big sums of money. once it turned into a situation of him having people "work" for money (using those quotes very lightly for the era where he did most of this stuff with his friends), i got really uneasy about all of it. i never really said anything because most people would think "whos this asshole calling out the guy curing blindness and putting wells in africa" which i understand, but also (vague pained noise). 
as a rule of thumb, i tend to steer clear of people who make a show of generosity, especially when they make the people work for it.
(In a really quiet voice) does anybody else on here really, really dislike mr beast because hes been getting some shit on tiktok and id like to talk about it 
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black-bhabie-2000 · 3 years ago
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Hii! I would like to request accidental stimulation in public by fem reader (may be she doesn't pay much attention that time about this? Or u choose ) & and then may be the Guys get flustered about this and they try to get close & get some stimulation with their S/O till they get home and then we can go all NSFW 😛 with KENNY, CHIFUYU, BAJI, MITSUYA please ♡♡ thank you for your time. Have a greattt day☆ xo
I hope I had the right idea with this.. thank you for being my first ask and sorry if it isn't right I did the ones I know and I hope you request again..
Mitsuya
You and Mitsuya have been dating for a while and you've gotten to see every side of him. Including what he's like outside of his Toman persona but you guys were about to hit an even bigger milestone. He invited you to his house. You were brimming with excitement. You stopped at his club after school to walk with him. He spotted you " Just a sec babe, alright make sure to not hurt yourselves and anything you mews up let me know so I can help you tomorrow. " with that He grabbed his stuff and grabbed your hand pulling you alongside him. The walk to his house wasn't long. You guys walked in and changed to his slippers and he led you to his room. "Feel free to look around." He said with a smirk. You laughed " How did you know !" He smiled and closed the door. You waited to see if he was going to com back in and he didn't. So you started snooping. The first thing was dirty magazines but sadly he hide them to well but you came across something better. In his closet was a bag with your name on it. What else could you do but open it and inside was the prettiest dress you've ever seen. You immediately stripped not paying attention to the door that was slowly opening and started putting on the dress. Once on you realized it really emphasized you curves and was a little too tight in certain areas. The whole time your tugging and trying to make it fit right. Your boyfriend is on the floor watching the show your putting on. " Wow you look hot babe" you turned around flushed and embarrassed. You forgot he would eventually come in. " You look very sexy in the clothes I made for you but it looks like it needs some adjustments " he smirked and stood up slowly walking to you. Your body moving backwards till your against the wall . Mitsuya leans in his hair tickling the side of your face. He grabs your side his right hand slowly sliding down your back and he whispers in your ear. " We're going to have to rip this off and start from scratch ." Let's just say you reached more than one milestone that day and Mitsuya makes you wear the clothes he designs on dates.
Baji
You and Baji have been in the same class for 2 years and yes yall both dumber than a bag of rocks. Only thing is you were more popular because of how cute your actions were. While baji was just weird. You asked Baji out and much to your surprise he said yes. You didn't know about Toman or that he looked like out of school until he asked you on a date to an amusement park. He told you his gang was going to be there and you excited about going on your first date pulled all the stops. Im talking about cute thigh highs, brand new skirt with a baby doll top that showed off your rack quite nicely 😏. Your makeup was beat in and you snuck into your older sisters makeup for the spray that would make sure your face wouldn't melt. Your accessories showed off you curvy and cute form. You hadn't seen Baji after-school and neither had he seen you. So you arrive at your meeting spot and couldn't see him. So you waited. You hadn't noticed the group of boys next to the fountain you walked past or kept circling. Draken called attention to you first with a nod in your direction "she's cute '
Takemitchy gasped "don't say that what about Emily " Draken laughed "like Mikey would let me date his sister " Mikey silently smiled to himself ready to go into the amusement park cause he was hungry. "Baji how long is your girlfriend gonna take, we've been out here for 20 minutes " Mikey whined. I don't know man she said she was here maybe I should call her ?" Baji responded. "You should've called her in the first place" chifuyu replied. Baji typed in your number and flipped chifuyu off with lead int the guys chuckling. You had hit the roundabout and stopped in your tracks a few feet in front of the boys. You picked up your phone in a hurry and answered it . You were kinda irritated " if you weren't going to be here , you shouldn't have wasted my time dumbass and hung up on him. Baji ofc looking at you and also stunned that you cussed at didn't say a word. Better yet all the boys were looking at you because one there was no way Baji pulled a baddy like you and two did you just cuss him out. You were Bout to storm off . When Baji caught your arm and spun you around, pulling you into him. You were shocked cause one wo to was this hot ass stranger and why was he so close. You went to yell at him and " hey babe if I knew you were going to get all filled up. I wouldn't have invited the gang and 'he leans I a little too close ' we could've went to my place for a study Date. He said gazing deep in your eyes and you knew exactly what he meant and it was for sure not studying. You pulled back half in shock cause you recognized his voice anywhere and damn you got lucky. You slapped Bajis chest ' hmph show me your friends dummy and walked away. Baji chuckling behind you , slyly gripping your hand. " Hey Draken the hot babes mine "
DRAKEN (kenny)
It was a comfy afternoon , the sky was gray and it was raining true peace. Well as peaceful as it gets in the red light district. You followed Draken all the way to his house and then hid when he got out. You walked around till you met the front desk clerksman and he recognized you. Though you didn't know how . He offered you some tea and led you to Drakens room. " I don't know when he'll be back and I'm not calling him so stay comfortable " he shut the door and left . You were in Drakens room your excitement trumping your guilt because you followed your boyfriend outta jealously. " It's so neat in here" you announce to yourself in a slight mischievous tone. Looking around cautiously you start to what any girl in her boyfriend would do . Look for evidence, not bad evidence but evidence. You had been strategically Looking and putting everything back in its place just in case he might get upset with you for Looking through his stuff. You did find a porn Magazine that showed you why he was dating you. You fit the body type of the page with white residue on it to a T . I mean her ass was a bit bigger but hey what's a girl to do. You had now moved on to store i.e. his closet . You opened and marveled at how many of those damn black and white jackets he has like damn Boi buy another color shit. You now completely forgotten you are trespassing cause your boyfriend doesn't know you are there. You start to strip and try on his clothes. Draken was making his way home it was still light outside and plus he needed to Chang into his toman uniform because Mikey wanted to meet up tonight. He was in the building heading up the elevators. Wondering why he hasn't heard from you all day. TF were you doing 😒, were you mad at him. He doesn't really know or care . He's just pissed you hadn't texted him all day. "I'm going to punish that brat next time I see her 😏" the elevator door opened and he stepped off with a pep in his step to change a little faster and head to your house and mess with you before the meeting. He walked up to the desk .
You had lost track of all time and now was getting ballsy. You half naked was about to put on his toman uniform. All your sanity is apparently out the Window cause you are giggle Loud as fuck. Your couldn't fit the pants but his jacket and boots fit nice and the way your ass looked hanging out the bottom of the jacket oof girl, you left it open revealing your bust just enough and you had your hair in a pony tail trying to mimick your boyfriends hair. ' I'm Draken and Mikey is my leader and son and if you wanna hurt him you gotta fight mee grrr"... you had your fist up and a very sad attempt of a bad ass face. You currently fake fighting and giggling like an idiot had no idea Draken had been watching you since you put your hair in the pony tail. (Stealthy bitch) you turn around doing a bad ass kick and scream and dive to his bed and cover yourself up. " WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE. YOU DIDN'T CALL OR TELL ME YOU WERE COMING " Draken laughed " Sweetcheeks this is my room' he approached the bed and ripped the covers off of you. You squirmed away from him till your head hit the wall. Giving Draken enough Time to place himself over you." Well hey there babe , you look pretty sexy in my uniform " his hand trailing up the side of your thigh. " I have 1 and 45 before the Toman meeting that's enough time to show you my bad ass skills huh sweetcheeks" you gasped .......... Draken was very late to the meeting that day and your brother was pissed when you went home the next day but shit that was the best sleep you ever had 😏😏😏😉🤷🏿‍♀️
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yoshkeii · 4 years ago
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"𝙰 𝚜𝚑𝚢 𝚌𝚛𝚞𝚜𝚑"
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࿐ character(s): Ushijima Wakatoshi, Daichi Sawamura, Kuroo Tetsurou
࿐ genre: sfw, soft/fluff, comfort, tiny angst if you squint
࿐ type: headcanons (hcs)? / imagine
࿐ requested by: @dumpsterfireinc 
⌦  shymale!reader (he/him)
⌦ ‘if I can request comfort hcs for Ushijima, Daichi, Kuroo, and Oikawa who have a crush on as shy male!reader who thinks the boys should be with a girl and not him.’
A/N: i had to drop oikawa on this one since i cant seem to get his personality out?? i- uh-. i apologize- also my way of writing hcs is weird? idk why i like writing like that, but eventually they’ll shift- somehow- (i’ll probably make a proper hcs post if you want-)
1-16-2021: sorry in advanced if this took waaay to long. im doubting my writings. kinda shit but im just burnt out.
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𝚄𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚓𝚒𝚖𝚊:
❀ Ushijima had a crush on you. of course he would, someone so soft, gentle, and shy. he actually found it cute you having those aspects. even though not a lot of people would enjoy such an introverted person at times.
❀ being shy would fit well together with his own personality generally. like being stoic and quiet himself. at some points he genuinely thought you and him were perfect. just two puzzle pieces that could fit together.
❀ he doesn’t know when he had a crush on you till Tendou or someone would bring it up. cause he always somehow had his eyes on you in the halls, classes, etc. 
❀ adding on to his personality, he is very blunt and straightforward with his words. and when you heard those three words from the intimidating captain. made your heart skip a beat, muscles tense, and mind race.
❀ “..y-you.. like me??” the softened tone in your voice echoed within the empty afterschool halls.
❀ “Yes. I just stated that.”
❀ “..I heard you.. you dummy..” you muttered the last words softly. fiddling with your fingers nervously, he always found you fidgeting with something whenever you were nervous or put on the spot. your gaze kept low.
❀ the silence only just settled. making Ushijima await another word from your smaller figure.
❀ but he didn’t expect those words to slip out of your mouth. he never did.
❀ “Why.. Why would you want to be with me.. instead.” your voice still kept your softened tone, but it had a faint hint of sadness. the slight wavering of your voice gave way.
❀ “..isn’t it better to be.. with a girl instead? t-they’re better options. pretty. talented. i-i don’t.. have any of those.”
❀ Ushijima just stared, unsure on what to do. no one told him this would be a scenario or a possibility. thought it was simply just a yes or no to a confession, something quick.
❀ “You also won’t l-look.. weird.. o-odd.. with-” your voice cracked, tears gathered in your eyes. quickly wiping them away with a sniff.
❀ “F-fuck I’m sorry.. for c-crying..” softly cursing as you nervously laughed.
❀ “y/n,” Ushijima lifted your head gently with his hand making sure your eyes looked up at him, “..I don’t care, if people will look at us weirdly. I don’t care if they all knew or not.”
❀ he wiped the tears dripping from your eyes as you stared at him with disbelief.
❀ “I like you. No- I love you. That’s that. I love y/n, and nothing will stop that.”
❀ shortly, tears poured from your eyes from his words. softly murmuring apologizes for crying over this accompanied w/ a smile on your face. Ushijima just wiping your tears away for you, seeing how your face just melts in his hand in comfort. regaining composure after a couple of reassurances from him.
❀ “I-I.. I love you.. t-too.. Wakatoshi..” 
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𝙳𝚊𝚒𝚌𝚑𝚒:
❀ mans had a big crush on you ever since you both had multiple shared classes. especially same homeroom.
❀ Daichi and you had an decent relationship, it wasn’t as close like he has with Sugawara or Asahi. having the same homeroom, he always found you alone and minding your own business a desk or two behind him in the back.
❀ sometimes exchanging the simple hellos and small talk whenever Suga and/or Asahi dared him to. knowing how his eyes occasionally drifts towards your direction of the room.
❀ for someone so quiet.. he didn’t know it could be a cute feature. an adorable one if he would say so himself. just seems too s o f t .
❀ your gentle voice always made his heart skip a beat, it was so calming. a remedy to his ears. after a few small talks and interactions, you both managed to hang out a little more often. being invited on study dates sessions since you were also pretty smart in the academics (brownie points!) 
❀ as of right now, his eyes were simply glued on you. just watching you talk about whatever subject. he really wasn’t paying attention... or at all. admiring your features from across the small table on the floor that was littered with notebooks, textbooks, papers and pens.
❀ he knew you were shy so he often kept things low and safe for you whenever you both hung out once in awhile. sometimes exchanging little sticky notes with each other to limit talking.
❀ once he confessed to you, through the last sticky note of his. not a manly way to really confess but he couldn’t figure anything else out for you. didnt want to scare you away.
❀ you stared up at the captain in slight doubt, going back to the note to reread the words written. ‘would you like to go out with me?’ tiny hearts here and there on the note.
❀ looking back up at him, you noticed the slight blush across his face. you realized he was serious.
❀ “..why would you want to go out with me?” your grip on the note slightly tightened, as thoughts began to flood your mind. “wouldn’t it be better- be better with a girl?? a-and.. not me.” you began to slip on your words, gaze slipping down to avoid his eyes as you noticed him looking up at you now.
❀ “..with.. a girl?” Daichi mustered out.
❀ “or.. anyone but... me. I’m not.. popular. I’m not.. p-pretty, c-cute.. handsome.. s-smart either...”  you began to ramble, negative thoughts after another.
❀ “H-hey y/n. y/n..!” Daichi was closer to you now, his hands on your shoulders hoping to get you out of your negative trance.
❀ it successfully worked, making you stop but your gaze still remain low. hearing a sigh from Daichi made you tensed, you liked him too. you loved him. but you don’t know if it was best for him to date you. or be in a relationship in that matter.
❀ Daichi wrapped his arms around you, “Don’t be so harsh to yourself. I denied most of the confessions... j-just.. to ask you out one day you know. I’m confident I want you more than any girl.” he muttered.
❀ noticing you relaxing in his arms made him slightly smile, feeling you hug back. your hands grasping the back of his gakuran, mustering the urge to cry you hid your face on his shoulders. eventually muffling out your soft sobs and various ‘i love you too’
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𝙺𝚞𝚛𝚘��:
𝚊/𝚗: 𝚐𝚘𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚐𝚒𝚏 𝚑𝚊𝚜 𝚖𝚎 𝚚𝚞𝚊𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐.
❀ it was obvious Kuroo was crushing on someone. and that someone was you. being one of the assistances, or at this point the team would’ve eventually called you their manager. often there to aid and help whenever needed so you stumbled by the gym many times to either drop something off for one of the members or coaches.
❀ always teasing and flirting with you, which wasn’t such an out-of-character of him. knowing him to be the master of provocation. but often when you weren’t there, he would start talking about you. unconsciously sometimes.
❀ which gave a big sign of his feelings, especially through Kenma. it wasn’t so hard to see, but you were dense and oblivious over it.
❀ he knew you liked him back eventually, seeing how you haven’t turned him down with any of his teases accompanied with the slight blush on your face each time. you were just too shy to say anything about it.
❀ he was aware that you were very shy and introverted. always seeing you staying back or infront of crowds in the hallway and avoided them at all costs. being observant he took note of it.
❀ always managing to catch you away from people or just a little people in the area, he used that time to talk to you more privately.
❀ you both began to get to know each other pretty well each time.
❀ exchanging interests and moments you’ve had in your life. often making you giggle at his silly retorts and remarks, funny moments of his teams and others. he was genuinely seeing a new side of you.
❀ never really seeing you smile brightly and laugh without holding back. it felt surreal and a literal dream.
❀ “Hey, y/n, have you dated anyone yet?” Kuroo looked over at you, eyes staring in curiosity with his common sly smirk.
❀ “I-.. uhh.. n-not yet?” you nervously laughed, messing with the sleeve of your nekoma track jacket.
❀ “Well then.. do you have a crush?” he continued on. 
❀ “O-oh.. Ye-yeah! He probably won’t like me b-back though..” you murmured.
❀ “Wait- He!?”
❀ “H-hey,, Kuroo! Keep y-your voice down please..!!” you playfully punched his shoulder in return he faked an ‘ow’ “..b-but.. yes.. i like a guy.. h-he’s popular so i doubt he would like me b-back.” you looked up at him with a weak smile, hoping to not seemed phased by it.
❀ “Ahhh.. why’s that then.” his curious tone turned stern, tilting his head into his palm so it rested comfortably. “hmmm~?”
❀ “Oh.. w-well.. he’s popular with the girls.. a lot of them a-actually. I bet he l-likes them more than me.. girls are b-better for him anyways...”
❀ “What if they weren’t? He could be gay.. or bisexual... or pan and all that jazz y’know y/n?”
❀ “Thats true.. what about you kuroo-san?” you took a sip of water from your bottle aside of your thigh. 
❀ “I have a crush too of course. And its actually you.”
❀ you choked on the water, coughing out a reply, “w-wait you.. you like me.. me- back?!” you only looked at him with disbelief, coughing slightly still.
❀ Kuroo only laughed at your off-guard reaction, “K-kuroo!! I-it’s not funnyyy..!” you whined, covering your face with your jacket. “hhhh.. g-god damnit..”
❀ after a few moments it went silently, peeking your eyes out from your hidden position Kuroo pecked your forehead. Suddenly aside of you, entwining his hand with yours.
❀ “Of course I like you back~ I want you to be my boyfriend you softie.” 
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up-sideand-down · 3 years ago
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please.. do you have any headcanons for cross dressing cloud? im so weak for him especially with the new mods of his skirt being undressed😭
Here is the 4 times Miss Cloud came to save the day and the one time Miss Cloud caused problems on purpose
1. Cloud never voluntarily brings out Miss Cloud. Usually only Aerith can get her to emerge. Cloud only brought her out for work once. It was a straight forward recon mission. Reno and Rude had to get into the Honey Bee. Cloud knows a guy. He called Andrea Rhodea asking nicely if two friends could get in for just one night, in and out.
"You know my price Cloud," Rhodea said.
"Fine," Cloud said, "what table?" Cloud had to come with them. Actually Miss Cloud had to. Reno and Rude rolled with it, the professionals they were (Rude blushed the whole time and Reno kept teasing until Cloud threatened his manhood) They got in with Ms. Cloud. Cloud was an incredible distraction as well. Reno and Rude sat in the back watching their target. Miss Cloud sat in the best spot for the whole show. There were a lot of whispers about her. She even got a peck on the cheek from Andrea Rhodea himself when they left. It went very well. Reno and Rude agreed to let the lady have her secrets
2. Ms. Cloud appeared again when the Leaf House needed some extra cash for renovations. The kids needed it. Cloud dragged Aerith to get a makeover too...then it was just stand around Wall Market and look pretty.
Aerith got a little jealous that Miss Cloud was more popular than her. Probably because Cloud was more aloof and untouchable. She was the one who made the competition. Cloud just floated up and down the main square. Ms. Cloud earned double the money that Aerith did and she never said one word.
"What's your secret," Aerith said as they smuggled the gil back to sector 5. Cloud gave Aerith his best Miss Cloud Stare.
"I just don't give a shit," Cloud said. It was a valuable lesson for Aerith.
3. Miss Cloud reappeared when Elmyra's house was robbed. She didn't lose much, but she did lose her grandmother's teapot. It was a sentimental item. Cloud was furious, used a variety of Turk resources to track it down. Miss Cloud appeared to take the teapot back from the low-level gang that was stealing in Sector 5. The leader was enchanted by the lady who just floated by. He got her alone...and then she hit him over the head with a bat. She disappeared with a lot of his loot. He searched for her all over. He just got a staff to the face from the Church girl and then a lot of the Leaf House kids.
Elmyra never asked, but she was happy to have her teapot back.
4. The last time he really saved Aerith's butt. Aerith caused chaos in her wake on a good day. This day the chaos came back for her. A guy she had pretty much swindled by overcharging her flowers for came back for revenge. He told her to get him the refund or she would regret it.
Miss Cloud appeared at the pick up point. She was beautiful as ever. And deadly.
"I know people," Cloud said, "people who will make sure no one finds your body. And after I finish gutting you," Cloud paused to pull out a knife from...somewhere, "I'll leave you to die slow and painful. Am I understood." He just paled as Cloud pressed the knife blade against his cheek and pressed him firmly against the wall.
"Aerith gets forgiven," Cloud said, "take the loss...or you lose something else."
"I understand," the man said.
"And I have eyes everywhere," Cloud said, "you never ever look at her again." He left alive and perhaps with a few more cuts and bruises than he'd like to admit and an aversion to pigtails.
5. Cloud just snapped at something stupid that happened in the tower. Probably something Heidegger or Scarlet did because it mostly affected them. Quite a few of the Turks were in on it too, but their only job was to deny, deny, deny.
A beautiful woman appeared teary eyed in the tower begging to find her husband. He had worked for ShinRa faithfully for years until he just disappeared. The search went through several departments, but there was no sign of him.
Then the woman disappeared, just the smell of her perfume remained. By the time the Turks were brought in, the story had formed. The woman had died years ago. Her ghost had come in looking for her husband...or her killer. Maybe both.
A lot of rumors said that killer was Heidegger too. Cloud was very smug about that for days after.
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goldentsum · 4 years ago
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━ jealousy
REQUESTS: (seperately) bokuto, hinata, and akaashi x jealous s/o. say that she isn’t a very jealous person to begin with but there’s another girl who seemed to have taken a liking to the boys and she doesn’t like it. add some angst if you will :) hopefully ends with some fluff. 
🎕 asked by: nonnie 🎕
CHARACTERS: bokuto koutarou, hinata shouyou, and akaashi keiji
GENRE: angst, fluff
AUTHOR’S NOTE: i don’t know if i did it right but D: i’m rlly active rn cus im excited idk why-- also hinata has a lot of dialogue in this one
━ bokuto ♡
bokuto is a jealous baby owl and you know it,, know it too well... he gets pouty if your attention is elsewhere even for a minute!
you, on the other hand, is as cool as a cucumber. well, that what it looks like anyway. 
you get jealous quite a lot, to be honest, but your pride won’t live if you show it so you just try to shrug it off every time
but when kou gets a little too much attention it pisses you the fuck off 
you get snappy and your mood is down for the day but kou is always on his way to make it better~ 
the baby owl may be oblivious but when the topic is about you, he pays attention to your every movement and to what makes you tick
so when someone!! a person you hate because of their flirty attitude and rude remarks gets a little too close to your baby--
oh, it's about to go down!
you’re in the cafeteria sitting on one of the free tables, waiting for your hyperactive baby owl, when you see a certain someone clinging to Bokuto and pressing their chest against his arm
aND WHAT PISSES YOU OFF MORE IS THE OBLIVIOUS SMILE ON BOKUTO’S FACE
you turned around and looked at the juice box you bought for bokuto and grabbed it roughly, stabbing the straw to drink it yourself
you knew how popular bokuto was and how ‘plain’ you were but it still hurt when people never respecting bo’s personal space and your relationship as you two were publicly open with your relationship
akaashi, who was lagging behind bokuto, saw this and quickly rescued the dense captain making a certain someone whines about it but akaashi paid no mind and dragged bo away and towards your table
“hey, babe!” 
you looked at him and rolled your eyes, scoffing a little with the straw still on your mouth as you proceed to ignore him
bokuto’s eyes widen at that and sat closer to you, leaning closer and putting his head on your shoulder, nuzzling at you. 
this usually makes you break but nope, your pride said nope and you ate lunch with bo pouting and whining to you. akaashi who watched the whole scene sighed.
the next time you saw bokuto was at dismissal with him racing to your classroom the moment the bell rang. he went inside when your teacher dismissed you and waited on the side for you even though you were ignoring him. but what slightly shocked you was the serious face he has on. 
when everyone else was gone and you were about to go to, bokuto grabbed your hand and made you stay
“what’s wrong? please talk to me...” He whispered, hugging you close to his body. 
you pouted at that, the gesture cracking your cold demeanor quickly. you sighed and hugged back the sweet boy.
“i’m sorry for ignoring you, kou...” 
you felt his smile on your skin making you smile too
“It’s okay but please explain...” 
his innocent words and eyes made you shy. maybe you overreacted a little bit but your ego is too big sometimes
you averted your eyes and looked at your shoes, bokuto’s arms still around you. 
“cus... you let (h/n) touch you and you were smiling too!” 
you whined a bit, looking up at him. his surprised expression then turned into relief and he started laughing
“who knew you were the jealous type too, (Y/n)!” 
you pouted and hid your face on his chest, 
“shut up... i’m human too, ya know... and you’re not one to talk, you’re the one who always gets jealous..”
“That’s cus my girlfriend is too pretty and too many guys have their eyes on you!”
you scoffed playfully at that, not having the energy to remind bokuto that those guys were just asking for some notes or something to you, knowing well that it would brew into bokuto pulling up his ‘facts’ and arguments on you again that those guys were unto something...
“shut up, you owl”  
“your owl~” 
━ hinata ♡
this small bean is also one of the easily jealous type and he creates a safe and danger distance around you in his mind
there’s only a certain distance a guy can come close to you and if that line gets crossed, he goes pROTECTIVE MODE
tanaka and noya are proud of their pupil as they watch him circle around you like a rabid dog or crow?
he is always with you! ALWAYS! And he always buys you some cold drink or if you don’t bring lunch, he lets you share his bento with the courtesy of his mother as he asks her to make a bigger lunch for him when he knew that you don’t really bring your own lunch.
so when it was lunchtime and hinata was nowhere in sight, that worries you a LOT
you run to the courtyard where you two usually hangs out with kageyama but was surprised to only see Kageyama and his milk box
jogging up to the tall male and you asked him about shoyou and you heard an answer you were not expecting to hear
“some fancy pink letter asked him to go to the rooftop, it said that they wanted to say something to that tangerine” 
(y/n).exe has stopped working
kageyama looked at you with a quirked brow, still sipping on the milk box, he poked you with a curious look
“why did you let him go, you idiot!” you said, surprising kageyama who pouted and glared at you
“why the hell are you yelling? he’s just meeting someone!” 
“you dense blueberry!” you shouted and hit kageyama on the shoulder with a light scowl
kageyama was about to retort when a familiar childish growling caught his attention as you both looked at the side and saw a glaring hinata racing towards you two at a fast rate
“why you kageyama--! don’t get too close to my girlfriends!”
hinata slotted himself between you two and started bickering with the tol blueberry
you sighed at the scene in front of you and a light pink object caught your attention. there it was, a pink chocolate bar in hinata’s hand as he waved it around, trying to punch kageyama. 
you frowned at it and started walking away, leaving kageyama and hinata at the courtyard. hiding from hinata, you ate lunch in the bathroom stall as icky feelings start to grow.
after lunch, you quickly run to your classroom wanting to avoid seeing hinata at the moment 
but luck wasn’t at your side when Hinata dragged you off and got inside the janitor’s closet with you. 
“hinata, what are you doing! lunch is already finished, i’m gonna be late for class!” 
you tried to leave the small room but hinata closed the door when you tried to open it
“no! you left me with kageyama all lunch break!”
“i-i had a stomach ache and went to the nurse’s office--”
“i went there too, you weren’t in there” 
an awkward silence filled the small room while you looked at hinata with surprise
“i-it doesn’t matter--”
“It does matter! If you feel the need to lie to me then it’s a big matter!” hinata said, frowning at you 
you sighed and let hinata hold your hand
“please tell me what’s wrong” 
“i heard you got confessed to”
hinata blew a fuse at that and started waving his hands furiously, “h-how’d you know?! i didn’t accept it, i promise--!” 
“you didn’t?” 
hinata stopped for a moment and looked at you, eyebrows furrowing
“yeah, i got myself the best girlfriend... why would i wanna change that?” 
you went closer to Hinata, letting your body hit his and hugged him
“i-i’m sorry... it’s just that, i thought you would find someone better and leave me...” 
“I WOULD NEVER! You’re the best girlfriend in the whole wide world, (Y/n)!”
“You’re the best boyfriend too, little tangerine” 
━━ akaashi ♡
let’s be real here, you’re definitely the jealous one in the relationship. I mean having a boyfriend who’s too pretty to comprehend and easily attracts a lot of attention can make you like that. but you hide it pretty well, well most of the time anyway...
akaashi always ALWAYS pays attention to you and knows everything that can trigger you to become sad, angry, jealous, and happy
he always makes sure that you’re always fine and happy, that you’re comfortable and content
we stan the perfect boyfie 🥺
bUT he can be quite dense sometimes when it’s not about you or volleyball.. fUKURODANI PPL ARE DENSE 
girls would always flock his classroom before you can get there, snacks and treats in their hands to give it to akaashi and being the petty little gremlin that you are, you were pouty
akaashi sighed because it’s always either you were pouty or bokuto is and sometimes the worst-case scenario happened where both of you are pouty at the sAME TIME! 
akaashi= Mom Daddy
you reached our final form of pouty when you saw a certain someone a bitch dragged akaashi to talk to him or whatever and being the curious thing you are, you followed them and hid behind the vending machine, listening to their convo
“you know, your girlfriend is cheating on you, right?” 
wHY THAT BITCH! She just lied like it’s her common language wtf! 
you prayed that your baby boo won’t believe her cus YOU ARE NOT CHEATING ON HIM! why tf would you cheat on him when you hit the jackpot? tf
“and you must know that spreading rumors and lies about a person can take you off the first string in the track team right?” 
oOF--! YOUR BOYFIE REALLY POPPED OFF HUH
you snickered behind your hands, listening to the lying snake stutter a complain but akaashi cut her off 
“if this is all then I’m going now but if i hear any rumor circling around (y/n), i won’t hesitate to take action myself.” 
the snake scoffed at that and walked away, stomping 
there was silence for a moment but then keiji called out, surprising you
“i know you’re here, (y/n)” 
you stiffened at that and moved away from your hiding spot while coming up with excuses
“i-i wasn’t doing anything! she just dragged you off so i followed--!” 
akaashi smiled softly at you, walking closer and patted your head gently making you feel flustered.
“i know, let’s go? you must be hungry” 
“you won’t leave me for her, right, keiji?” 
akaashi shook his head at your question, a small smile on his face and looked at you, letting his hand fall and held your smaller hand in his
“it’s not like you’ll let me leave”
“HEY! you make it seem like i’m holding you as a hostage or something!”
“hmm”
2K notes · View notes
five-rivers · 3 years ago
Text
Danger First
Chapter 10
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@pocketramblr :)
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One day - and not even a whole day, because of travel time and Inko wanted Izuku home for dinner- simply wasn't enough time to master a quirk. Although he could turn Float on and off, now. So, they made plans to come back next week, and the next, up until the sports festival. Which. Wow. Really was only two weeks away.
Izuku had never realized how close to the beginning of the school year it was.
He was going to die.
"You're not going to die," said Mr. Yagi. "I'm not going to say the sports festival isn't important, because it is, it's one of the best ways to make professional connections for students, but not doing well isn't the end of the world, especially not in your first year. No one expects you to be perfectly polished."
"But," said Izuku, "I'm supposed to be the next you! I've got to stand out, right?"
Mr. Yagi looked very guilty. "I... may have given you that impression when we were first training, yes. But, since then, with all my research into the past holders... few of them were popular, flashy heroes. If you want to walk the same path as me, that's great. But you don't have to. Even I didn't really start that chapter of my life until after college."
Izuku looked down at his hands, letting silence fill the space between them as he contemplated Mr. Yagi's words. "This isn't about me manifesting One for All differently, is it?"
"What? No, no of course not, my boy. I mean, it certainly helped me come to this conclusion, I wouldn't have done so much research without it! But I certainly hope I would have come to the same conclusion eventually, even so."
"Okay..." said Izuku, still dubious.
"I mean it," protested Mr. Yagi. "Most of my work is essentially underground, you know. There's a reason the battle trial was what it was."
"H-huh? You? Underground? But you're so recognizable!"
"Am I? I firmly believe in bringing all my resources to bear in the fight against evil! Ha ha!"
His laugh devolved into a cough, and he fumbled for a handkerchief. But he recovered quickly enough.
"I guess that makes sense," said Izuku, cautiously, once he thought Mr. Yagi wasn't going to start coughing again.
"You didn't think I stayed number one by popularity alone, did you?"
"I- the formulas the Hero Commission uses to determine rankings are secret, and it only includes spotlight heroes, so when I extrapolated the hero billboard rankings, yes, I assigned a high weight to popularity. There were always some discrepancies between my predictions and the end results, but I figured I missed some events, or the commission assigned them different values…"
"That's quite impressive, my boy. But, though popularity is a factor, the HPSC does take unpublicized fights and rescues into account. Assuming you report them…"
That was the second time Mr. Yagi had mentioned not telling the commission something.
"Do you, um, do you do that a lot? Not tell the commission things, I mean."
"Eh? No, no, I try to stay up on my paperwork. I get a lot of help from Naomasa, though. Some heroes, especially independent ones, without an agency, do have trouble keeping up, sometimes."
"It's just… the other day you said something about not telling the commission about All for One."
"Ah," said Mr. Yagi. He drummed his fingers on the steering wheel. "You're quite right. How should I put this… The HPSC knows All for One exists, and I have made them generally aware of his modern exploits. I haven't told them about his ability to give quirks, though they may know through other avenues, there are certain battles I've had with him that I haven't told them about, and they do not know about One for All."
“Why not?”
“Villains aren’t the only ones who seek power,” said Mr. Yagi. “The HPSC provides a vital service, and I think what one does matters more than why one does it, but… it is my observation that many of the people there are more concerned with personal power than doing the right thing. And positions of power and authority tend to draw in those who would abuse those things."
"Even heroics?"
"Especially heroics. The HPSC Ethics Review Board is supposed to stop that, but no system is perfect." He shook himself. "But look at me! I was trying to give you a pep talk, not saddle you with doubts about the government!"
Izuku laughed, nervously. "I mean, you've definitely distracted me from the sports festival…"
“Yes. The sports festival. Don’t worry about making a big spotlight combat debut. If you want to focus on rescue, or investigation, or the underground, I’ll support you all the way.” He paused. “You do need combat, though, because, because of-”
“All for One?”
“Yes, exactly. All for One.”
.
“Way to kill the mood, guys,” said Banjo.
“I think the mood was thoroughly dead already,” said Yoichi.
“Unlike your brother,” said En. “Ninth’s father.”
“Come on, it was just a little omission of information. It wasn’t even a lie!”
“It was definitely a lie. You’re so lucky that my relief about you not being a pedophile eclipsed my righteous fury regarding your mendacity.”
“You know, the fact that you’re delivering that completely deadpan gives me doubts about the fury part.”
“I’m mad at you.”
“You love me.”
“Doesn’t mean I can’t be mad at you.”
“Hey, hey, wait a minute,” said Nana, making a ‘T’ shape with her hands. “Time out. Ninth’s father is All for One.”
“Yes,” said Yoichi, hanging his head, “I thought that had been established.”
“So, are we… What Toshinori is saying is completely valid, by the way… but, are we expecting this kid to fight his father? Is that a thing we’re doing?”
“Uh,” said Yoichi, “in our defense, we did think he was dead.”
“Maybe Eighth will get ‘im before Ninth has to deal with it,” suggested Banjo. “He’s got to have a better chance of that, now what with Fa Jin and all.” He paused. “But, you know what would give Ninth an even better chance, if he does have to fight his deadbeat dad-”
“He’s not a deadbeat,” interrupted Hikage.
“What?”
“Calling him a deadbeat would imply that he is neither supporting the Midoriyas financially nor regularly in contact with them. He is on both counts.”
“What?” squealed Bango.
“Did you miss his phone call with his father immediately following his return home after the USJ attack?”
“Oh,” said Yoichi, “no, I was very aware of my brother’s evil, evil voice. It’s just that these guys were too focused on scolding me to listen to anything I had to say. I still can’t believe he sent someone like that to attack his own son’s class.”
“Didn’t he, like, kill you?” asked En.
“No, my death was largely unrelated. You’ve got to remember, I was a chronically ill fugitive from the law with no money. Who told you that he killed me?”
Everyone looked at their immediate predecessor. Yoichi tracked the path back to Third, who had gone very stiff.
“What the heck, Third? You were there when I died. Why would you tell Hikage that?”
Third did not answer.
“Actually, what did he tell you, Hikage?
“Oh, it was very moving and heroic. It happened while you were saving a busload of metahuman orphans. You sacrificed yourself to let them get away from All for One. I even cried a little.”
“Is it weird that I’m now disappointed in myself for not dying like that?”
“Very,” said Nana.
“What were we talking about before this?” asked En.
“I have no idea,” said Banjo.
.
Izuku delayed going to class, nervous about everyone's reactions to his quirk. It wasn't that he thought they'd reject him, but more that he had no answers for the inevitable questions.
But he also didn't want to be late.
"Todoroki was so cool!" Hagakure exclaimed as he opened the classroom door. "He was all like, blam, bam, swish! And- and he checked whether or not I was there first, before attacking, which was super cool of him."
Todoroki's expression was halfway between 'statue' and 'help, I've been hit by a truck.' "Cool?"
"Very cool."
"You've grown since the first day, kero."
"Ah! Midoriya!"
All heads turned towards him. In the next second, he was hugged by several people, which was more friendly skin contact than he'd had since… ever, probably.
"Eep," he said.
"We were so worried about you," said Uraraka. "We made a group chat, after, but since you were unconscious…"
"Hm," said Monoma, "your quirk still is definitely a stockpile…"
"Monoma!" shouted Iida. "Did you join this hug just to copy quirks?"
"And what of it?"
"But speaking of quirks," said Jiro, "you can fly now? We kind of went along with it at the time, but that's kind of different from a sensory quirk."
"I know," said Izuku, "and I have no explanation."
"Maybe your quirk stockpiles danger," said Monoma, contemplatively. He rubbed his chin with one finger. "That could be why you can sense danger- you're stockpiling it. Then, when the danger gets over a certain threshold, you can release it as flight… why are you all looking at me like that?"
"Oh, nothing," drawled Kaminari. "Just that you're more thoughtful than you look, pretty boy."
"I don't want to hear that from you."
"Th-thank you, Monoma! I'll have to mention it when I go to quirk counseling next."
Which may or may not be this afternoon, depending on how Mr. Aizawa felt and- His head snapped to the door. "Mr. Aizawa's coming!"
They all rushed to their seats. The door creaked open.
"Oh my gosh, he's a mummy."
.
"Iida?"
"What is it, Midoriya?"
They were having a bit of a break during English while Present Mic cycled them through for short sessions with Hound Dog.
"I didn't have a chance to ask you earlier, but how's your brother?"
“He’s alright! It’s the first really major injury of his career, so he’s going to take it easy for the rest of the month, to make sure his engines heal properly. He’d prefer not to of course, but, ah, there is a silver lining.”
“That’s good,” said Izuku, encouragingly.
“I really shouldn’t be happy about it,” said Iida, rubbing the back of his neck, “but he’ll be able to come see me during the sports festival, and he probably would have been too busy if he were active.”
“I think it’s okay to be happy about good things, even if they happen because of bad things,” said Izuku. “It isn’t like we can go back and make the bad things not happen, after all…”
“That’s very true, Midoriya! What a mature way of thinking about things.”
Izuku didn’t know about that, but he was willing to take the compliment.
.
“Midoriya,” said Shouta, who was absolutely and unquestionably recovered enough to teach. Even if he had zoned out in the corner of the room in his sleeping bag all morning rather than trekking back to the teacher’s lounge… or teaching any of his other classes… shut up. “What are you doing at the window?”
“O-oh. Mr. Aizawa. I didn’t know you were awake?”
It was, maybe, a little unfair to single Midoriya out like that, since the entire class was standing by the window, and the way Uraraka, Sero, and Midoriya were closest to it, with Monoma a close fourth, was concerning, but Midoriya was the first one Shouta saw, and the one most likely to to cave and tell him what was going on.
“Midoriya.”
“R-right. Well, going out the door seems a little unpleasant today, so we thought we’d switch it up?”
What did that even mean?
“We were going to bring you with us, of course,” continued Midoriya.
What did that even mean?
“Out the window.”
“Um. Yes.”
“What kind of unpleasant are we talking about?”
“Battle trial unpleasant?”
Shouta groaned and hauled himself up, walking over to the door. He looked out the window and made note of all the students from other classes standing out there, circling like sharks. Great. Maybe they needed to have an assembly about respecting boundaries or whatever, especially if the people whose boundaries were being crossed were potentially traumatized.
Something to bring up at the next staff meeting he attended. Which… would probably not be soon.
Anyway.
He opened the door.
(“A mummy,” whispered someone.)
(First his kids, then these kids… he wasn’t that wrapped up.)
(Was he?)
“What are you all doing here?” he asked, voice rasping rather more than he wanted it to.
The students didn’t seem inclined to answer. Someone did mutter something about the sports festival, but it was far from the complete answer that Aizawa wanted.
“Right. Whatever. Scoping out the competition is one thing, but you are aware that class 1-A is recovering from a traumatic experience. And you’re blocking traffic. Clear off.”
The crowd slowly dispersed. Shouta sighed. He knew this would only be the first of many such incidents. He made a note to talk to Nemuri about whether or not she’d be willing to donate some of her class time to talk about public relations.
.
“You know,” said Nemuri, “if you actually rested, Recovery Girl would be able to heal you.”
“I know nothing of the sort,” said Shouta, glaring at his desk in the staff room. “I’m forgetting something.”
All Might walked in. “Er, young Aizawa,” he said. He paused for a painfully long, awkward moment. “Are you still meeting with young Midoriya today?”
“Crap.”
.
Did Izuku expect Mr. Aizawa to come to their meeting? No. The man had casts on all of his limbs. But, he hadn’t cancelled it either. So, better safe than sorry, right?
But it had been a while, now. Izuku could probably safely assume he wasn't coming after a half hour. He got up, packed his bags, and reached out for the door handle-
Only to freeze as Mr. Aizawa yanked it open and pulled Mr. Yagi into the classroom after him.
Izuku scurried back to his seat.
"Nothing physical today," croaked Mr. Aizawa. "We're going to figure out your quirk."
“O-okay,” said Izuku.
Aizawa collapsed into the seat behind the teacher's desk. “To be short, this quirk, One for All or whatever, is complete nonsense.”
“Uh,” said Mr. Yagi. “Sorry?”
“Sorry,” whispered Izuku.
“You should be. Not you, Midoriya. You’re fine.”
“Okay?”
“Right. So. You’ve got two quirks right now. Danger Sense and Float. Unless something else showed up over the weekend?”
“No, it’s, um, it is just those two right now.”
“And you’ll most likely get Smokescreen, Blackwhip, and that strength enhancement eventually. Plus two mystery quirks.”
“That is what I’ve been able to find out,” said Mr. Yagi.
“So, we have to figure out some way to get all those under a coherent umbrella that can account for the mystery quirks, and before the sports festival, so the evil immortal supervillain doesn’t notice that you have quirks just like a bunch of people he had personal beef with.”
Mr. Yagi cursed in English. “I hadn’t thought about that.”
“Yeah, I wonder what else you haven’t thought about. Maybe this year I can get Nezu to take my suggestion about doing hero names before the sports festival seriously. You know we’ve had people stalk students before because for some godforsaken reason we use their real names? I need a drink.”
“Ah, water?”
“No.”
“Young Aizawa, you’re a teacher…”
“A career choice I question daily. Midoriya, do you have any thoughts about how to make your quirk make sense in a way that won’t get you killed or abducted by the HPSC?”
“I- Does that happen?” despite his conversation with Mr. Yagi over the weekend, he still had generally positive thoughts about the hero commission.
“I have no idea. Wouldn’t put it past them.”
“Well, um, I was talking to Monoma earlier, and he said something about stockpiling danger, and how it might let out the stockpile as the energy necessary to levitate- which, really, would be a fascinating quirk if it did work that way- but I thought it might also work for Smokescreen and the strength enhancement? I mean, general responses to danger are fight, flight, or hide, so the strength enhancement is fight, Float is flight, and Smokescreen would be hide…”
“That might work. What about Blackwhip.”
“Yeah, that one has kind of stumped me.”
“Blackwhip sure is a problem,” agreed Mr. Aizawa.
.
The ghosts started laughing. “You’re a problem, Banjo,” chortled Nana.
“Come on, guys, that isn’t funny!”
"It is! It's hilarious!"
"They were just talking about All for One tracking the kid down and killing him!"
The mood sobered quickly.
"Considering that he is Ninth's father," said Hikage, "I suspect it's far too late for that."
"Yeah," said Yoichi. "But, just to be safe, and in case there are other weirdos out there, new rule: no giving him new quirks in public. Not that we can do anything about when he eventually manifests the stockpile…"
"What if he's going to die?" asked Hikage, raising his hand.
"He already got your quirk, why do you care?"
"We'd like to hear it," said Banjo, somewhat forcefully.
"Well, if he looks like he's going to die, do whatever you can to stop that from happening, I guess. But chucking a quirk he doesn't know how to use isn't always going to be the beat answer."
"Wait," said Nana. "Hold up a second. A few days ago we were talking about the potential for multiple quirk brain damage, weren't we?"
"Oh, good catch," said Yoichi. "I guess I forgot to mention it, which means Nana is the only one I'd trust babysitting my nephew in the event a quirk rewound him to elementary school age-"
"That is a suspiciously specific scenario," said En.
"-and all the rest of you are fired. You didn't even question giving him more quirks? Really?"
Hikage raised his hand. "I assumed you had discovered that Ninth had a constitution capable of handling multiple quirks, similar to yourself and your brother."
"That is true. Okay, Hikage would be another exception, but he's disqualified from babysitting for other reasons."
"That's fair."
.
"So we need something that can do all that, and has tentacles," said Izuku, squeezing his bottom lip in thought.
"Yeah," said Mr. Aizawa. "Honestly, even really dumb ideas would be welcome right now."
"Why are you looking at me?" asked Mr. Yagi.
"You know why."
There was only one creature Izuku could think of that could do all the things Izuku one day might be able to while maintaining room for the two mystery quirks. "Cthulhu."
Mr. Yagi looked mildly scandalized at the suggestion.
"Nah, it'd have to be something like eldritch. Cthulhu's trademarked in Japan, and that can give you aboveground types trouble."
"What is it a trademark for?" asked Mr. Yagi.
"Ask Midnight. I don't want to talk about it."
"Ah," said Mr. Yagi.
"The problem with that is that you currently have no justification to call it that. Now if you already had Smokescreen…"
The adults looked at him.
"... I don't think it's going to just show up like that," said Izuku.
.
"Why not?" asked Banjo, staring at En. "They practically asked you for it."
"Well, first off, I live for drama, so jot that down."
"Huh? What about me?" asked Yoichi.
"Nothing, it was just an idiom. Second…"
.
"...Right," said Aizawa. “For now, then, we’ll have to give it a temporary name, because it’s starting to get to the point in time where it’ll actually be illegal for you to not register it.” He shuffled his casts. “Yagi, start filling out those forms with what he can do currently. Midoriya, make sure you check him when he’s done. For now, we’ve got to come up with a name.”
“Um,” said Izuku. “Float’s the only one that’s really visible, so I could just call it Float?”
“Vetoed. You aren’t picking a name that the immortal supervillain knows.”
“He did seem to only refer to people by quirks unless he really hated them,” said Mr. Yagi. “Except his brother, who he always called ‘my foolish brother.’”
“Focus on the paperwork.”
“And he called himself by his quirk name as well,” mused Izuku. “Do you think it was a side effect? Quirks have document impact on people’s personalities-”
“Focus.”
“R-right. Um. Feather Fall? No, that’s part of a game. Flight Reflex?”
“Good enough for now,” said Aizawa. “Flight Reflex it is.”
81 notes · View notes
lovee-infected · 4 years ago
Note
When will it come out where Epel cut off MC I am still waiting until this day (I'm waiting) I'm not rushing you at all but I hope you are doing well 😢 (im sad)
“Apple of my eye”
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(A/N): Sorry that it took so long! Hope you enjoy this anyway dears! ~ ♡
Ever since Epel decided to cut ties with you after learning the truth of you being a girl, his life has been nothing but an absolute nightmare. He's got his days filled with fear and his nights filled with regret, wishing there to be a way for both of you to forget. Forget all the times you made him laugh, and all the times he made you cry. He wanted there to be a way for the of you to move on with your lives as if you'd never hurt one another like now. But as it is for now, he is just one step far from being trapped inside this hell forever alone, because you're finally about to leave the twisted wonderland, forever.
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Living in Night Raven college has brought you nothing but pain since the day Epel, your trusted best friend and the guy you once loved rejected you after learning the fact that you are a girl. Each and every second spent around all your friends and people you used to admire felt like a torture. How long? For how long are you going to wait until them too throw you away like Epel did? For how much longer can you pretend to be fine until everyone left around you turn their backs on you as well? Days? Weeks? Months? Or have they already given up on you?
You can't take it, it just hurts so much. Even when there's a friend around, it feels like you're ready to break down in tears and run away again and again; just like it happened with Epel. Why does it hurt you so much though? You were supposed to be strong. You were all on your own when you first came into twisted wonderland, you thought you'd be able to handle it again on your own from now on. But uh, how wrong you were. To think that you'd be as strong as you used to now that your dearest one has left you behind...
No wonder why you immediately agreed to Headmaster Crowley's offer when he argued that he might've found a way to send you back home by passing through the black mirror under 2 conclusions : 1) You'll never be able to make a return to twisted wonderland and 2)You won't remember anyone, or anything from this world. As if it has never existed.
At this point, forgetting Epel and everything about him forever seemed to be the only way of letting go of the pain... Now that you can't have him, best would be to never remember how much you once loved.
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"(y/n)... is leaving?" Epel murmurs. Rook shakes his head as a yes, all he could do was to at least let Epel know after how things had gone between you and him lately.
Perhaps Rook was the only one who exactly knows happened that morning, the day Epel tainted each and every memory you once had beside him which you used to recall as your sweetest days of life.
Even as Rook was just sneak peaking behind the wall and all he could do was to listen to Epel shouting and you trying to calm him a bit, he's pretty certain that he heard the sound of your heart breaking the moment Epel mercilessly told you that he's cutting ties with you.
Young Epel really did have a hidden dark side all this time, didn't he...?
Lucky of him that Rook was the only one who saw that. Rook may not be that respective toward people's privacy, but he does know how to keep a friend's secret. As for now, he had to agree that your case was concerning. Not just for you but for Epel himself as well. It's pretty rare of him to feel so but he you can tell that he does care.
"In a few days or so, just enough of time for her to patch stuff up and, well, say goodbye to her friends,"
Friends, huh? To think that not so long ago Epel deserved to be reminded as your friend... How fast did it all change,right? Time is an absolutely terrifying thing, he thinks.
A moment of silence passes until Rook speaks up: "Aren't you going to say goodbye?"
'Say good bye',...This sentence keeps on being repeated inside Epel's head. Why would you even want to hear these words coming from him while Epel himself was the only reason that you have to leave? He hurt you and there was no way to undo what he did to you, even if he could one day be able to face that you, his best friend and at some point, the only friend ever since he stepped into night raven college are a girl, it was impossible to look into your eyes again like he hadn't done all the terrible works he did.
That is a fact, he can't fix a broken heart, neither his or yours. Yes, he was mad at you and is still mad. He felt so used to see that you of all people couldn't even trust him with such a simple thing like your gender. The fearful thought of you getting that close to him because he was nothing but a naïve boy who couldn't tell the difference between male and female. If so, were all the times you told Epel that you cared for him a lie? Did you just want to play him around because he was a lonely boy who didn't have any other friends to talk to? Did you too find him stupid...? Why (y/n)? Why..??
Epel bites his lower lip trying his best not to cry in front of Rook. He already cries enough every night in bed and doesn't need another audience watching him suffer.
"Epel?" Rook calls, making Epel realize that he hasn't yet answered his question.
No, he isn't going to walk up to you just to say goodbye. But if he refuses to do so, wouldn't it make that heartless "I'd rather cut ties with you" his very last sentence to you...?
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Epel rolls over and his bed again again, another sleepless night. Though something made this night worse than the previous ones, tommorow would be the day that you'll quit his world forever, and he didn't even come to say his last goodbye...
When was the last time he Epel got a proper night sleep anyway? He can't remember. He's sure been a while that he wanted to take a second in peace, either through sleeping or through reality. When he was awake, he wanted to shut his eyes on life. When he tried to sleep, it either ended with him squirming in his surprisingly 'uncomfortable' bed all the time or waking up wet in sweat from another nightmare.
The only time he actually got to sleep for a minute at least was during classes. 'Hopelessly romantic boy', his classmates teasingly called him. Telling how those who're slowly falling in love would lose the track of their lives and become a total mess like Epel was. Epel never said a word in opposition as he didn't want to end up telling them the story of him recklessly breaking your heart after all you'd done for him, yet it was already obvious that he didn't like this term being used for him at all.
Hopelessly romantic boy...huh?
His insomnia issues were no joke, he couldn't concentrate during classes at all. His vision was all blurry and his eyes felt heavily sleepy. Teachers kept on talking and talking while Epel just stared at the mess of words forming enormous sentences in the books until his eyes went shut. There were a few times that even teachers ended up having to shake him after the class to wake him up before sending him to the headmaster's office right away.
"Young Felmier, are you okay? You've been looking very, uh,you know, different lately"
Is he okay? He's been asking himself the same question for a while.
"Yes, Headmaster"
'I, am not okay.'
He hasn't been okay for a long while, at least he's well aware of it. But there's no point in letting anyone else know, right? Perhaps the only one who might've understood how horrible he is feeling right now... was you. Epel drowns in thoughts and memories are brought back to him:
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It's been months since then, but it feels like it was just a minute ago, that he had his head on your shoulder as his warm tears soaked your clothes and his warm breath brushed against your neck. It was probably one of his worse days ever. He ran off having tears in his eyes in front of enormous people, yet not a single soul cared to come after him but you. He was a total mess when you found him under the apple tree, his face was flushed and his diamond blue eyes were filled with pain and tears. You didn't even know him much but seeing him like that, in pain and tears, Epel was no more than a stranger but for some reason...it still hurt. You couldn't take it. Accepting hugs from strangers isn't really his thing, but to be comforted right as you need nothing more than an embrace to cry on, it felt...nice.
You've been always beside him from then on, he couldn't really tell why. He was neither too strong nor too smart, he wasn't any famous or rich either. He was nothing but a random country boy who got noticed by you, the mysterious student who got widely popular throughout the school because of their bravery and strength to fight against several overblots without having any magic after a rather short time.
He often felt proud of how lucky he was to have you. It wasn't just because of how famous and adored you later became, he could tell that there was something special about you from the very beginning. You probably didn't notice but when he first met you at the enterence ceremony, he didn't realize that he'd been keeping his eyes on you all the time. He didn't know why, what could the reason be? Curiosity? A childish interest? Or... something else than these?
From the day after, he couldn't take his eyes off you. It was strange, he doesn't usually get to see someone this much around, but you...you were always there. Right in front of him.
He couldn't help but to watch silently until you walked up to him and started to chat, he can't ever forget how silly his first conversation with you went. He was stressed out whether you'd realized the way he was staring at you all this time, could be that you were offended? He was honestly expecting this to be another trouble coming his way but to his surprise, it wasn't.
Though it took a rather long time for him to finally gain full trust on you, after a while spending time with you wasn't simply something he enjoyed doing. It became a part of his daily routine. No matter what, he wanted to see you, no, he needed to see you. Make sure that you're right, that everything between you is still the same, that he'd have you by his side for another the day he won't be left all alone if anything goes wrong.
You were his reason to keep his self-esteem built-up no matter how rough life could be, you were the only one who could give him a safe shoulder to cry on and and an embrace to close his eyes through and the thought of still having you was what gave him the purpose to keep on smiling through another rough day.
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Epel nails the white bedsheets as he digs his wet face harder into the pillow, trying not to scream at the pain. What has he done? Why? Why??
How could he do this to you, the person he adored and cared for the most? Yes, you lied, but so did he. He never wanted to cut ties with you. He was furious and insecure, afraid that you might've never considered him any more than an emotional fool. It scared him, he didn't want to be the idiot you'd one say leave behind without caring to let him know that you never needed him back.
He couldn't let go of you as you'd became a part of Epel himself after all this time you've been together.
He was scared of what bigger things you might've hidden from him, including your true feelings for him. What if deep inside, all you saw through him was a helpless toy to use?
Thoughts, thoughts, thoughts,...they were driving him insane.
It hurt way too much to the point of thinking that he hated you. He never did, how could he? Even if he ever ends up hating everything and everyone including himself like he does now, there's no way that he'd you. You were his everything, his happiness, his hope, his wish, his angel.
'Hopelessly romantic boy'... What if his classmates were right about him though?
Oh lord, what is wrong with him? He can no longer deny the fact that he did fall in love with you while he thought it was nothing more than a simple friendship.
Only if he'd realized this sooner, only if he could've said that he loves you instead of asking you to get out of his life, only if he could've had a second chance to hug you one more time and tell you how he truly feels...
And now, it's too late to regret what he's done. You probably hate him now, and he knows that he deserves to be hated. He was the reason of your teary eyes and sleepless nights. And he and only him, was the reason of you wanting to leave all your of your friends and your memories with them behind by making a return to your own world.
As it's clear than he doesn't deserve you and your love, he decides to let his heart burn inside the flames Epel started on his own.
Let him suffer in the name of you, his one and only love, for eternity.
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It's past noon yet Epel doesn't want to get out of bed. He doesn't want to look at the clock, though he's pretty sure that you've already left his world.
He wonders...where are you right now? Back to your own world? Next to the friends and family whom you love? You sure don't remember him anymore but...are you happy? Will you now live as the happy (y/n) he'll always love without him there to hurt you again?
"Sorry (y/n), sorry..." He whispers underneath his breath. Hot tears stream down Epel's face, and he squeezes his eyelids shut in the hope his tears would stop. He sat on his bed unmoving, with his choppy breathing and watery eyes remaining for quite a while. He was so lost through his pain and sorrow that didn't hear the knock on his door at first.
"Who there?-" Epel murmurs through his tear. It's probably Rook, wanting to see why he didn't make it to school today. His door continues to be knocked on, yet Epel doesn't care to answer thr sound. Doesn't matter who the hell is at the door, he doesn't want to talk right now.
He hides his face under the blanket, can't he just cry in peace? He hears the sound of his door sliding open, but doesn't bother getting the blanket off his head. He annoyedly wraps himself tighter in bed. 'Whoever you are, just leave me alone. Please, I don't want to-'
Takes a few seconds until he feels the blanket being pulled off him, he vaguely turns his head, ready to shout: "GET LOST" at whoever his interrupter is. He opens his mouth to yell but the sight of the person standing in front of him leaves him speechless.
Your bodies remain still as your eyes are locked, neither of you move a finger until you break the silence:
"Epel..." you whisper. He looks pretty different from the last time you saw him. His face looks much paler and thinner now, and from the swelling bags under his eyes you could tell that he hasn't really been sleeping well lately. The the rage and hatred you saw last time in his eyes is now replaced with emptiness and sorrow, a severe pain that makes your heart ache for him one more time. He looks so, so broken. So lost, so sad. It hurts a lot seeing him like this, though you'd sworn never to think of him the way you used to again.
"I, I came to say goodbye-" you say nervously. What is Epel having in mind now? How is he going to respond? From the way your last conversation went you could certainly tell that he held nothing else than for you now, but you, could you be the same?
Epel didn't show up to say goodbye which was another evidence of him not wanting to see your face ever again, but something deep inside your heart, something you couldn't let go of ever after he let you down told you to come to say your very last goodbye.
Epel's eyes widen in fascination. This time, he can't hold back his tears from falling. You won't stop surprising him until the very last second, will you?
Right at the moment you are expecting him to be mad and push you back again, he throws himself into your embrace. You are about to say a word, but all you can do is to let Epel feel your warm embrace and the torrent of his tears soak through your shirt. It is too painful to see him like this.
"Wh-why...Why-are you like this-? Why did you come? Why are you still being this kind?? Why can't you just hate me!?" he painfully screams through his tears. You can feel him clench his fists, as he pushes himself closer to you. You have your emotions mixed up, you can't tell wether you should be sad or happy. But here he is, crying into your embrace like he used to do before. For a second it feels like your paths had never been torn apart, that you never got separated and he never said those words which hurt you the most.
You let him rest his head on your shoulder and run your fingers through his hair, time and time again, in an attempt you calm the silent war within his mind.
For the hundredth time, you are reminded of how much he meant to you, from the very moment you were interested in getting to know about the pale lavender-haired guy who's been secretly watching you all the time.
You remember all the times he made you laugh and that sweet smile he always put on when he greeted you in the morning, you remember each and every time that he needed your embrace to either cry or feel a bit better after the hard they he might've gone through.
You remember all the times you silently cried in bed knowing that you were slowly falling for the young boy who you genuinely held dear, that he was slowly becoming the apple of your eye.
And there he was, walking in front of you, unaware of the feelings you, young (y/n) had for him and how he was truly, the one and only for you, the apple of your eye.
Before you know it, Epel is no longer the only one crying. You hold him tighter, pushing your head to his shoulder and letting your hot tears fall off your eyes, realizing how much you've missed him after all this time. Epel doesn't pull back, instead he follows and allows your bodies to come closer and closer, until there's no space left. At the moment your bodies are close enough to become one, he's got the rhythm of your chest raising and on his body and you've got his on yours. Warm breaths brushing against each other's face that it makes it almost hard to breathe.
For a second, it feels as if you and him are the only beings on the whole world and your world is skipped inside the warmth you're drowning through right now. There's no past, no future, no pain, no feelings at all. All you know is the present you're having with him, wishing that this moment would last forever.
"I...I love you," Epel whispers, only loud enough for you to hear him under your fascinated gaze. You let out silent gasp as your head's still on the back of his shoulder.
'What did he just say..?'
Those words...those 3 forbidden words you thought you'd never him Epel them back if you ever did. Yet you kept on loving him, totally aware that he might never develop such feelings for you back.
You were supposed to make a return to your own world by now, all you'd came for was a simple goodbye to someone you were supposed to consider your ex-best friend, but you know that it would be a lie. He wasn't just your best friend, he was once your everything: Your love, your smile, your tears, your hope. Even after he bitterly told you to cut ties with him, you couldn't let go of the feeling. You felt empty without him, a life without him was clueless and dark, you felt so lost, so empty, so brokenhearted. You'd lost Epel, and never thought that you'll ever get to have him close again, let alone hearing him say that he loves you back.
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And now, it's all up to you. What are you going to do now? For the first time in a while, your future now relies on nothing but your very own choice. You're caught in the middle of the path, stuck between leaving the twisted wonderland for your very own sake or staying here with Epel, in a stranger world which you don't belong to, next to the guy you once appreciated the most.
With everything you've been going through all this time, what will you choose to do? How will this story come to an end? Choosing to go and leave all the pain together with all the happiness you've been experiencing next Epel all this time behind, or letting go of the past and giving him a second to maybe lead you through a life you once dreamed to have with him?
Epel has probably got a lot more to say other than that three words, knowing that you're probably running out of time if you're going to return to your own world, next to the family and beloved ones you haven't met in forever, are you still going to stay here with Epel and allow him to talk? With all the things that he did to you and made you have a severe mental breakdown afterwards, are you still to give him your attention and love, and let him have a chance to be the apple of your eye again...?
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peachcitt · 3 years ago
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peach's top songs to project adrien agreste onto: waterparks edition
(disclaimer: the title is not to say that there will ever be other editions, but i did want to specify that this list is entirely comprised of songs made by the band waterparks. thank you)
ive been experiencing adrien agreste brain worms in relation specifically to waterparks, which is one of my favorite bands, and since ive been going insane over the adrien-specific feelings these songs have been giving me, i decided to make a master list of exactly how i project adrien onto these songs. this is going to be a long one
structure:
Intro
Airplane Conversations
Black Light
Cluster
Double Dare
Entertainment
Fandom
Greatest Hits
Conclusion
1. intro
it should be mentioned that i originally started hardcore projecting adrien onto waterparks songs after i started making my mlb radio rebel au in which adrien is a pop singer for his dad/in a band for fun with his best friends. i was trying to figure out what adrien's music might sound like, or what vibe his music would give off, and my mind immediately went to waterparks because they're one of my favorite bands and also because im insane.
in my head, for the au specifically, waterparks' earlier garage-band sounds from their EPs (airplane conversations, black light, cluster) would've matched up to adrien's band for fun in the au, and their later more pop-leaning songs from later albums (mostly fandom but also double dare and entertainment) would've matched up to the pop songs he released under his father's label. so that's how it started, which is, like, the most absurd origin story ever, but such is how it goes.
it should also be mentioned that i don't project adrien onto EVERY song, and the songs i do project him on aren't like. the most perfect fit, but there are always certain lines that scream adrien, and if it's like that, then i will include the song on the list.
with that explained, let's actually talk about the songs i project adrien onto and why:
2. airplane conversations
like i mentioned earlier, waterparks has a couple of garage-band sounding EPs, and this is for sure one of them. airplane conversations is the first EP they released, and the main themes are: feeling stuck, recognizing the fact that you are Growing Up, and being in love
5/5 songs on this EP can be considered adrien songs
silver
the song starts with:
"i’ll be the silver lining around your fence used to protect yourself from all the world and its sharp teeth 'cause my open hand and heart think you belong with me"
which is very ladynoir-esque. the beginning line of wanting to be "the silver lining" around the other person's protective fence against the rest of the world reminds me so strongly of chat's place as ladybug's partner; she wanted so badly to guard herself against the rest of the world after she became the guardian, and chat saw that and wanted to be her bright side to all the stress of being the guardian/a superhero. he stayed beside her and joked around because he loved her but also because he recognized that he needed something bright - a silver lining - to balance out all her stress. and "my open hand and heart think you belong with me" is pretty self explanatory, but chat's heart is always open for ladybug - as a partner, as a friend, as a potential lover. he supports her, in any and every way she might need.
in the second verse, we get:
"I was the one who kept myself standing tall You were the light at the end of the hall"
which relates to adrien enduring his dismal home life. his father and the work his father imposes on him isn't easy, but adrien was and still is able to stand tall beneath it all - partly because of what he wants for himself (he ran away to public school entirely on his own, after all), but also because ladybug is there to mark and signify the freedom and love he feels with her as chat noir.
bones of '92
so bones of '92 isn't. like a super adrien song, mostly because it's very much about the struggles waterparks was having as a new band, however the outro is. well. it's:
"i won’t let you down just promise that you won’t forget about me can’t stop the future from settling but i can change the way it feels just promise that you won’t forget about me"
this feels like adrien is speaking to his father in the first couple of lines ("i won't let you down / just promise you won't forget about me") because of how much of a strict and absent father gabriel is. i think adrien, at least in part, believes that the only way he is able to gain affection from his father is by doing exactly as he says and going along with what his father wants.
the next couple of lines ("can't stop the future from settling / but i can change the way it feels") is adrien's hopeful call to the future. he's stuck right now with his father, and he maybe even thinks that he'll always be stuck doing what his father wants, but he can change how he feels by being chat noir. by being chat noir, adrien is taking hold of his own future and his own feelings, shining a positive light on the future that he may not have had before.
the last line, a repetition of "just promise that you won't forget about me" could again be talking to his father, another plea after expressing his own desire, like he thinks that his father won't approve of him wanting his own things. or it could be adrien talking to ladybug or even the city itself; adrien loves being chat noir, but he's not really as popular as ladybug, and he also fears his relationship with ladybug. he needs frequent reminders from her that he's valuable and important to her, and so this fear of being forgotten - by her or Paris - tracks well with his character.
i was hiding under your porch because i love you
also not a huge adrien song BUT the line "it's just you and me / through all these inconsistencies" screams ladynoir
they all float
again, not a huge adrien song but my powers of projecting are unmatched and the line "this time i'll do things the way you wanted / it's not right, but it's just the way you wanted / lay it all on me, 'cause i'm all ears" is another adrien to gabriel line.
fantastic
i did not really consider this an adrien song until i looked up the lyrics and realized it was. im right. we have the chorus:
"i can't imagine fast enough to settle on a dream but i've spent this winter wondering when they're gonna settle on me and there's some things i've just gotta know but one thing's for sure"
which is another inscription of adrien's hopelessness in regards to his position with his father; he's never been given the opportunity to truly figure out what he wants for himself, and so he doesn't even really know where to start. the "one thing" that's for sure can be interpreted as the controlling hand gabriel has on his life, or it can take a more hopeful tone, considering that we have seen adrien take those first steps to move out of gabriel's control - by going to public school and by becoming chat noir. the "one thing" for sure could be gabriel, but it can also be that, for sure, adrien will always find ways to escape gabriel.
in the post chorus, we get:
"and i can't wait to go outside and spend my summers contemplating what I'm gonna do with my life"
which lends hope to adrien's "one thing" being him able to escape because of the excited tone of the lines. he "can't wait to go outside" as chat noir, outside of the mansion, and take time to contemplate what he wants from his own life, for himself.
3. black light
black light is the second EP waterparks released, and it's another garage-band sounding EP. the main themes of this EP are: being frustrated with your situation and the people in it, and wanting to carve out a better future for yourself
4/6 songs on this EP can be considered adrien songs
christmas
this is!!!!such an adrien song!!!!!! this is one of the songs that i picture adrien's band playing in my au i mentioned earlier. we start the song with:
"i fell asleep last winter woke up and it was august not much has changed, yeah, i still feel the same but i’m slowly making progress"
which fits into the themes of adrien's character i talked about during airplane conversations of adrien going through the motions of what his father tells him to, but slowly trying to break out of that control and make progress for his own goals.
in the chorus we get:
"i’m just waiting and i’m just saying maybe the end is near but all that means is a new beginning"
this isn't like. super adrien related but i still think it deserves mentioning because of how it progresses through the song (which i will mention in a second), but i think it relates well to the "growing up/fearing the future" stuff we've talked about.
we get a featured singer sing this part (which in my au nino sings, it doesn't matter):
"i’m just waiting for my chance to put a picture of me, put a picture of me in the dream scenes of dream scenes of dream scenes of dream scenes of my ideal future"
which, again, relates to adrien wanting to be able to call his future his own, outside of his father.
and in the outro, we get the lyrics from the chorus changed up a little, so that we get:
"i was waiting and i was saying the end wasn’t ours to fear and all it meant was a new beginning"
in my head, because of the way the tenses change from present to past, this would be adrien's perspective after the events of his childhood and teenage years. but because his youth is also so tied up with being chat noir and defeating hawkmoth (who is his father) i think this is such. this is such an emotional and hopeful line, looking at this from adrien's point of view. after defeating hawkmoth, despite how truly grueling that might be for him, he becomes free from gabriel's control. growing up, defeating hawkmoth, facing the end of childhood means adrien can have a new beginning. he can have his ideal future.
american history
american history isn't fully adriencore but the line "the action's a fraction of how much this hurts" is very much "we're teenage superheroes fighting supervillains every day and somehow the action of the fights is not the worst thing that's happening in my life"
new wave
i actually named my au after this song because it's such a bright, upbeat song against adults who try to tell you the way the things you do isn't right. it fits right in with the theme of the au, and it can also be applied to ladybug and chat noir's fight against hawkmoth.
in the first verse we get:
"call it new wave say it like you should because a call to arms is a calling card and i’m calling soon hoping i can get through to you"
which is like. hawkmoth is "calling to arms" his akumas, which in turn acts as a calling card for ladybug and chat noir. the "i'm calling soon / hoping i can get through to you" is chat noir specific because of the fact that hawkmoth is his father; instead of just defeating him, adrien will probably feel some empathy towards his father and want to get through to him.
in the pre-chorus, we get:
"every single time you throw your white flag down and surrender like every single second's just another second spent to lose but this is something i can’t lose"
which translates to hawkmoth akumatizing a new person nearly every day but still pulling back and "surrendering" after the akuma is defeated. he's playing the long game; he's confident that, eventually, he'll defeat ladybug and chat, and so he doesn't really care if he loses another day. but for ladybug and chat noir, this is life or death. they can't afford to lose to an akuma even once or else they lose the miraculous, maybe their lives, and definitely paris. they can't lose.
the outro is a variation on the intro and it's:
"call it new wave until it's all washed up because we'll be crashing soon but before we do i hope i get through through to you"
which refers to ladybug, chat noir, and hawkmoth "crashing" together in their final battle, but, before they do, adrien hopes to get through to his father, connect with him. and maybe that might make the "crashing into each other" less severe.
night maps
night maps is another song that fit into my au; it starts with:
"i couldn’t keep up with watering myself down and so all that grew was the high tide until i drowned the oxygen had all run out and now i’m left dried up and standing here"
which translates to adrien being drained and watered down to be the image his father wants him to be. the rest of the song, however, is about finding a place for yourself and beginning the process of being yourself again, which, for adrien means being chat noir.
4. cluster
cluster rounds out the early garage-band EPs as the third and final EP. the main themes of this EP are: being separated from someone you love and feeling frustrated about your situation.
4/5 songs on this EP can be considered adrien songs
crave
this is a very bittersweet song about being in love, which makes it, for my intents and purposes, a very bittersweet song about being in love with ladybug. at the beginning of the song, we get:
"i wish i could forget you but it's out of hand i wish i was aggressive and had a plan"
in canon, adrien dated kagami, but still obviously had feelings for ladybug. he did, however, like kagami a lot, and so he might've wished that he could forget his feelings for ladybug, especially knowing she can't reciprocate and he had an amazing girl right in front of him. he wants a plan to get out of feeling for her and for feeling for kagami.
in the chorus, we get:
"i'm cravin', a getaway from the smooth talk, that's keeping me grounded to the, carpet in my room my quiet blue tomb of you"
as chat, adrien can't resist flirting with ladybug because that's the friendship they've established with themselves, and ladybug is always smoothly replying back to him with jokes of her own. her banter, as much as he loves it and values it, keeps him thinking about her when he's alone in his room instead of thinking about kagami. his love for ladybug shouldn't be - she can't love him back and he is in a relationship with someone else - and so his bedroom where his innermost desires come to light becomes a guilty sort of place.
territory
territory is so ladynoir it hurts. in the intro we get the lines:
"i wear my game face in your headspace where it's storming at least most days we are both like that we are both the same"
which translates to ladybug and chat meeting, at most points in time, in order to fight akumas - hence, they always have to have their "game faces" on. ladybug's headspace is "storming" most days because of her stress with being the guardian and fighting akumas - and they find solace in each other's company because they're both teenagers burdened with way more than they should be.
the bridge gives us:
"i'm gonna hunt you down cause i'm a handful i'm gonna freak you out but it's all substantial so bring me bad news anything you have to just to keep me on my toes"
which is how chat views the way he tells his feelings to ladybug; he knows she'll probably "bring him bad news" by rejecting him, but he wants to continue being around her in her territory - he wants to be her friend, and he also wants to keep loving her.
pink
pink can also be a song about adrien loving ladybug, especially with the chorus lyric of "you're one of my favorite few" which is just. SO sweet and romantic but anyway. in the pre-chorus we get the lines:
"i'll watch you from my telescope; my eyes stuck to my favorite show i barely get more than a glimpse but it's better than nothing, yeah, i know"
which is like. adrien doesn't really get to see ladybug often, at least not in a relaxed setting like he really wants to. he feels far away from her, but when he does get the chance to be near her, he tries to absorb as much from the interaction as he can, throwing out dumb puns, flirting, and generally trying to get to know her in between akuma fights. it's not the ideal way he'd choose to spend time with her, but it's better than nothing.
no capes
no capes is another song about adrien wanting to be different that what he should be (with lines like "the anything slash everything that i should be / but i don't want to be like that") but this one takes a more somber and scared tone, which could relate to the fears he feels as chat noir.
the pre-chorus is literally just the line "no one will ever love us the way that i do." for adrien, being chat noir is so important to him, considering his home life, and he knows ladybug likes him, but she doesn't love him. he loves their partnership, he loves her - he fears he'll be in a position where he's wanting this (being a superhero, being friends) more than she does.
in the bridge, we get the lines:
"i hope you watch me through the letdown 'cause no one will be here, be here forever"
which could translate to any anxieties he feels about what happens after they achieve their goal of defeating hawkmoth. adrien has a lot of issues - issues about adults in his life disappearing/dying or emotionally leaving him behind - and he doesn't want ladybug to be another person to leave him behind after everything is over. he wants to still be able to be friends with her, maybe even learn her true name. but he fears that won't happen.
5. double dare
with double dare, we've breached album territory: double dare was waterparks' first official album, and it started branching into more polished, pop-leaning songs. the main themes of this album are: being tired and frustrated with something that you should like and loving someone who may not love you back
5/13 songs on this album can be considered adrien songs
stupid for you
stupid for you is ladynoir. it's ladynoir so hard. i mean, we have lines like:
"you're yellow, i'm natural blue let's get together and be green like my insides"
which. okay i know adrien is generally seen as the yellow golden boy and he is! but like, looking at him in comparison to marinette/ladybug and actual color theory, he's more of a natural blue. he's more likely to fall victim to negative thoughts than marinette is; she's generally more positive, more 'yellow.' (also, when you consider that their character design colors are each other's colors when inversed, this also makes sense - adrien is 'blue' beneath his appearance and marinette is 'yellow') and the "let's get together and be green like my insides" relates because green is a chat noir color. he wants them, in their 'yellow' and 'blue' contrasting moods to get together and be green, like chat noir, who is generally silly and joking around. he wants them to be able to be silly together.
in the chorus, we get:
"hey, tell me what you want me to say you know i'm stupid for you hey, can you come and come out and play? you know i'm stupid for you"
which is like how he is after he's been rejected; he doesn't know what to say after she tries to get him to stop flirting. he wants her to give him blueprints of how to act so that she'll like him (i.e. what color rose he gives her), but he still wants to be around her and and joke around with her.
in the bridge, we get:
"Just double dare me And I promise now that I'll stay It's not like you're married but I still got carried away"
which further develops his insecurities in regards on how to interact with her - he knows she didn't like when he confessed to her, that it made her feel guilty and a little upset because she couldn't return her feelings, and he got carried away with his over-the-top methods. but if she were to ask him to stay with her, in any sense of the word, he would do it in a heartbeat.
in the second chorus, we get:
"you're playing ring around my head i wear you like a halo you're a symphony, i'm just a sour note i'll take what i can get the best is hard to grip when everybody wants you and everybody wants you"
which conveys how ladybug is always on his mind ("you're playing ring around my head") but he likes this fact - or at the very least he doesn't mind it ("i wear you like a halo"). he sees her as someone who is so good and so out of reach for him ("you're a symphony, i'm just a sour note") but he still wants to be around her as much as he can. he'll take what he can get in terms of her time and attention, because he knows how the entire city is vying for her attention - she's the face of paris and she's the guardian and she has her own life to attend to - he thinks that maybe to her, he's just another person in her life who wants her.
royal
royal is only kind of an adrien song with lines like "i'm two faced from your double exposure" about his conflicting personas between what his father wants from him and what he himself wants to be, and this is especially poignant because of the "double exposure" metaphor, like the cameras adrien is behind for his modelling jobs are what make him "two faced"
royal is also about working so hard but not knowing if the pay off is worth it, which also relates to adrien's job with his father.
take her to the moon
take her to the moon is a "adrien loving ladybug song" with lines such as:
"i wanna make my way into your kiss i wanna live inside your mind next to your favorite songs i won't slow my pace until your walkway i wanna lose my mood inside a late night phone call with you"
which such a sweet lovesick yearning idea that adrien has 100% thought about ladybug before. i rest my case
powerless
powerless is a ladynoir song. in the first verse we get:
"you know i'd make the time i'm just waiting on your green light yeah, i'll be at your porch by this time tomorrow 'cause i'm almost not fine, but i'd never let you know"
which is like. adrien is SO down to be anything ladybug needs - he has almost no time at all what with his father's schedule, but he will always make time for ladybug. he's literally just waiting for her to call, and he'll be there. but in terms of actually letting her know how important she is to him in his life, as both a friend and as someone he loves romantically, he can never tell her because he doesn't really want to worry her.
in the chorus we get:
"you're the only one that makes me powerless tonight all i am is losing track of time tell me why oh, oh you never really missed me back"
which leads us into the bridge:
"i want you to need me like i need you i need you to see me when I'm see-through it's sad but it's true: no one's waiting for you but i was thinking we could get away sometime yeah, let's call it a date and you can devastate my personal space i never liked it anyway"
and that tells us how strong his feelings are for her; they're so powerful that he's effectively powerless against her. but he feels as though he's the only one that feels that way - she never seems to miss him back. but he wants her to want him in the same way he wants her - he wants her to be able to see him, in all his details, and still like him. and he wants her to go on a date with him and actually get close to him - get up his personal space because with her, he doesn't actually want personal space.
i'll always be around
i'll always be around is guess what!!! another ladynoir song!!! the chorus gives us:
"you know i'll always be around i'd never never never leave you hanging out to dry because the world's gonna pass me by but if you wanted, i'd never never never leave your leave your side i'd never never never leave you out to dry i'd never never never get you off my mind"
which is so!!! relates to the previously mentioned ideas of adrien being willing to drop everything to do what ladybug asked. he's devoted and loyal to her - he always wants to be someone that she can rely on as both a friend and a partner, and, potentially, as a lover.
we also get the line:
"you stopped me in my tracks you caught me in a gaze"
which relates to the moment he fell in love with her when she stood up to hawkmoth in front of all of paris: in that single moment she'd caught him up into having feelings for her, even if she didn't know it.
and in the bridge we get:
"if there ever came a dark day (if there ever came a dark day) that crushed us out and took you away i'd chase you to the end i'd chase you to the end of the world"
which is so. so ladynoir. their relationship and friendship is constantly haunted by the threat of hawkmoth, and so this consideration of the terrible "what ifs" and the insistence that no matter what, he'd find a way to get back to her is like. yeah that's ladynoir.
6. entertainment
entertainment is the second album, and it continues leaning into the pop-alternative sound while still somehow sticking to the punk sound. the main themes of this album are: loving someone, loving someone who hurts you and isn't good for you, and feeling trapped in your circumstances
4/10 songs on this album can be considered adrien songs
11:11
this song is so!!!! adrien loving marinette core!!!!!! i actually wrote a fic that had one of the lyrics of this song as a title (my favorite set of stairs is the one up to your room)
the pre-chorus actually gives us this line here:
"my favorite set of stairs is the one up to your room and my heavy set of cares evaporates all around you evil comes in pairs and we like what we do you've got me feeling like a walking love song"
which just makes me think of the way adrien will be after the identity reveal happens. he already wants marinette to be ladybug (based off the sheer amount of times he's referred to her as 'the everyday ladybug' + every time he's gotten so close to discovering ladybug's identity and his brain has always gone, without fail, to marinette), and so when he realizes that she is ladybug, she'll quickly become the person he most wants to be around and the person he feels most comfortable around. because of how dismal his home life is, he'll probably spend a lot of time at her house, and he'll come to associate the stairs of her room with walking into love and comfort. he'll be absolutely smitten with her.
in the chorus, we get:
"i must've caught you from 11:11 the lucky number seven i try to hide with my words but you just find me clever i found a million places you'd be worth the chases to go-oh-oh"
which again just inscribes how strongly he would feel for marinette - and it's also kind of a pun because of how "lucky" he would be to have her. like. get it. lucky charm. anyway, his "hiding with his words" would refer to the way he disguises his feelings with humor, but she would be able to see past that - they would know each other so well. and, just like how i've said adrien is with ladybug, he would totally be willing to go anywhere and everywhere for marinette. this song is post-reveal adrinettecore.
lucky people
guess what fellas we have another song about adrien loving ladybug/marinette. after looking closely, it seems like we might have a post-reveal relationship sort of vibe here, but it doesn't really matter because bare bones? this song is about adrien loving ladybug who is also marinette.
we start with the verse:
"light us up until we pop i wanna burn bright 'til we're not let's keep each other safe from the world i'll be your optimistic black hole full of love i can't control let's keep each other safe from the world from the world"
which falls into the previously-discussed themes of adrien wanting to be around ladybug as much as he possibly can before they defeat hawkmoth and inevitable Something Different happens, and he also wants the both of them to stick together. the "i'll be your optimistic black hole / full of love i can't control" also relates to previously-discussed adrien themes where we know adrien is actually someone who is prone to negative thoughts, but he comes off as someone who is really optimistic, and also that he loves ladybug something fierce - it's a love that he knows has already scared her, but it's also a love that he feel like he can't help but feel.
in the chorus, we get:
"i know you said to mind my business but cupid sent me on a mission that's got me sitting, wishing, waiting for your call"
which plays into adrien's romantic nature conflicting with ladybug wanting to keep their feelings out of superhero work. regardless, because of his romantic nature, he will always be sitting and waiting for her to call him so that they can be together, even if it's just to fight akumas.
we also have the line:
"you've got me more than clumsy but you're my yellow, lovely"
which (SEASON 4 SPOILERS) after mr. pigeon 72 is like. adrien literally was so busy looking at marinette that he bumped his head against a car door. but he won't even mind!! because marinette/ladybug is a spot of brightness in his world that he absolutely adores.
rare
i am once again telling you that this song is about adrien loving ladybug. hear me out. i'm right. in the chorus we get:
"i just hope it's nicer where you are 'cause i only want to lift you up i guess i never really said enough for you to hear me where you are 'cause i only want to lift you up i guess i never really said enough so let me tell you now"
this is adrien hoping that, wherever and whoever ladybug is, she's living happily - at least more happily than him. he only wants to lift her up and support her, not only because he loves her, but also because he values her as a friend. but he feels like she doesn't know how much she truly cares about him - he feels like she brushes off when he tells her he loves her, so he wants to say it loud enough for her to truly understand.
and in the other half of the chorus, we get:
"my tired thoughts don't take vacations, oh no you float up in conversations, oh no you're my final destination, i know you're probably fine there just know i think you're rare"
which is where he tells her how he truly feels; he's always thinking about her, and when she comes up in conversation (which she does, she's ladybug after all), he feels some stress because he has all these feelings for her that his civilian self isn't supposed to have. and yet he feels like she's it for him - he loves her so much and can't imagine loving anyone else. she's his "final destination." and he thinks that she is so good and powerful and beautiful that she's rare in comparison to the rest of the world - which tells her how happy he is to have found her. (and, thinking about this line as if he's speaking to ladybug, it's funny for him to say that he thinks she's rare but refer to marinette as "the everyday ladybug." which really just tells you how highly he thinks of marinette)
sleep alone
we're rounding out this album with, you guessed it, another song about adrien loving ladybug. like. "i feel dead and a half but you're making me laugh" ?? which relates to adrien being overworked by his father but meeting ladybug in his spare time and managing to feel truly light hearted around her??
in the chorus we get:
"my face feels hot and blue my hands still count on you to let me down articulate and lonely enough for the two of us but if you want, if you want, if you want to you can call me on my phone, i'll run to you you won't ever have to sleep alone you can call me on my phone, i'll come to you you won't ever have to sleep, sleep, sleep alone"
which hints at how adrien knows that ladybug will continue to turn him down, but he can't deny his feelings for her ("my hands still count on you to let me down"). and he's lonely - isolated by his father - which he feels like he has enough to loneliness to cover the both of them, which is why he proposes that they stay together; he'll take on her loneliness, too. and, just like in all the adrien-loves-ladybug songs, we see that he is only a single call away from doing anything ladybug asks him too.
we also get the line "but if you want it you can have it, you can have me in full" which tells us that he respects her wishes to keep their identities a secret, and he understands that she doesn't have romantic feelings for him, but if she ever changed her mind - about either thing - all she would have to do is ask, and she would have him, entirely.
7. fandom
fandom is the third album, and it leans into not only pop-alternative sounds, but also rap and almost r&b alternative sounds. the main themes of this album are: wanting to be able to express yourself in the way you want, feeling separated from someone you love, and getting out of a bad relationship
7/15 songs on this album can be considered adrien songs
cherry red
starting off strong with the album's opener (which also starts with the ending music of the last song on the album which is- okay. this album's art. continuing on) which is - i'm thinking you're sensing the pattern - at least partly about adrien loving ladybug. cherry red is super short, and the only line that really applies is:
"cherry red you know i'd die for you"
which. cherry red refers to ladybug because of, you know, cherry red suit, etc. and the "you know i'd die for you" is. well. adrien has made it very clear that he will go out of his way during akuma fights to protect ladybug. it's not exactly dying, but it's close enough.
dream boy
dream boy is!!!!!!!! dream boy is THE adrien song!!!!! dream boy was the song that made me mold au adrien's band after waterparks, dream boy is the song that semi-inspired this post, dream boy is the reason i project adrien onto so much of waterparks' discography.
dream boy sounds a lot like a love song. but dream boy is, at it's core, a commentary on the way that media and fanbases treat conventionally attractive boys in the spotlight, and it's a commentary in the form of a bright, bubbly pop song. it's brilliant. it's adrien
the chorus, which is also the intro gives us:
"am i the boy you dreamed of? oh living in your subconscious, oh do you believe in love? oh and is it because of me?"
which is like. from the very start of this song, we get the idea that adrien (since we're supplementing the speaker as adrien, you get it) exists only as a the dream of a boy his fans have of the perfect boy. they believe in love because they love him, but they don't love the real him, they love the 'adrien' that they've constructed in their minds
in the verse, we get:
"build your expectations saturated and inflated 'cause i was born to be your favorite make me complicated i'm modern and i'm dated because i was born to be your favorite"
which builds on the manufactured feeling of adrien agreste. his public persona as a model was built by gabriel to make money - he was literally constructed as a teenage heartthrob "born to be your favorite" so that his father could profit.
and in the pre-chorus, we get:
"build-a-boy, pick my pieces overjoyed‚ never leave your heart destroyed, i'm your boy custom-made your beloved getaway i'm your favorite holiday you'll never be alone with me"
which is like. adrien is constantly rebuilding himself to fit the ideals other people want from him, and other people are constantly rebuilding him in their minds to fit the ideals they have for him. he isn't his own person - he's always belonged to other people, custom-made, depending on their preferences, to be the most likable he could possibly be.
high definition
high definition falls into the category of "songs about adrien loving ladybug while trying to be in a relationship with kagami." in my mind, i hear adrien in this song talking to two separate 'you's - both kagami and ladybug.
when the song starts, giving us the chorus we get:
"i'd love to be in love with you enough to write a love song, mmh i need to feel needed and i need it more than i let on"
which is adrien speaking to kagami. he wants to love her because he knows she deserves it and she's an amazing girl, but he can't. but he still needs that affection she gives him because he's lacking it in other parts of his life.
in the second half of the chorus, we get:
"i'll be home just thinking about it, maybe call like i used to but i'll just stay alone because alone is safer than with you"
which, in my head, is where he transitions to talking to ladybug. he still thinks about her and he wants to be with her, but he recognizes that those wants aren't responsible while in a relationship with someone else.
in a verse, we get:
"i know i'm not around enough to make me worth the wait it's like who wants to be close with someone who always goes away? and even when they're here it's like where's your fucking head at? why's it take so long to text back? you're so bad at loving people back"
which is where we see his relationship with kagami devolve. (SEASON 4 SPOILERS) i mean, this is almost literally why kagami breaks up with him; he's always running off for seemingly no reason, and even when he was around, he was emotionally distant because of his feelings for ladybug.
telephone
telephone is a HUGE ladynoir song. this is a song about how much chat wants to be able to get to know ladybug, which gives us lines like:
"i'd like to know your middle name let's talk about your parents and your future dreams i'm interested but distant to a fault and i'd never want to complicate your heart"
which is just like!! he wants to know all the little information about her like her middle name and her parents, but he also wants to talk about her and her dreams. he wants to know her, outside of the mask, but he knows that's not something she wants, so he tries to keep these wants tamped down.
the second verse gives us:
"i talk a lot, but we could fill your frames with pictures of our faces 'til we share a name i'm living on a target and you shot it with an arrow now i lost my self-control, i can't stop thinking and i'm thinking that i lost it all these aisles feel like miles where you go, i'll follow"
which, again, expresses his desire to be with her in her civilian life, even fantasies about marrying her. he is so stupidly in love with her - and, as i've talked about before, he is absolutely devoted to her. wherever she goes, he'll follow.
never bloom again
never bloom again is a little too sad for my to comfortably label it a ladynoir song but this line:
"now all the girls in los angeles look like you from a distance i tried to give you space until i stepped away from your brain and now i just miss it"
is very adrien-loving-ladybug-esque. replace 'los angeles' with 'paris' and you get adrien trying to find ladybug's features in every girl he meets while still trying to give ladybug space on their secret identities.
[reboot]
[reboot] isn't a really an adrien song, but it does reference dream boy, which is worth mentioning. in the chorus, we get the line:
"i never promised you your dream boy i'm better as your chew toy"
which could be like adrien's actual thoughts on his placement as paris' and his father's manufactured dream boy persona. he's not actually everyone's dream boy, he's just a toy for them to use a destroy.
zone out
zone out is a huge adrien song because it is literally just dream boy. zone out acts as a break before the last song in the album, and it is the lyrics to dream boy set to a softer, more lullaby-esque tempo and instrumental sound. it's a lot sadder than the normal dream boy, and you can really feel the fact here that dream boy is not a love song.
with zone out, we have adrien's actual quiet, sad feelings about dream boy. he wants to fill the dream boy role for his father, but he can't, really, because he can never live up to that level of perfection. he will always fall short.
8. greatest hits
and with that we have reached the most recent waterparks album. this album plays with experimental genre sounds even more so than the previous two, but is still unmistakably the "waterparks" sound. the themes of this album are: strange dreams and nightmares, struggling with being in the spotlight, and wanting to feel loved
7/17 songs on this album can be considered adrien songs
lowkey as hell
lowkey as hell isn't overtly an adrien song but the chorus plays on the common themes we've seen before:
"if you need me now i'll be there somehow i'll pick you up, we can ride i'll fly away like i bought my own airline i'll take you with me, we can ride"
which is basically that adrien will always be around to do anything ladybug needs - if she ever has the need to call to him, he'll always find a way to be there for her.
violet!
i won't go too in depth about it, but violet! is about a stalker and their victim, who is the speaker, and you cannot tell me adrien does not have any stalkers at all with the way the show portrays his fame. he's probably had to deal with his fair share of crazy fans, so i thought i'd mention violet! here.
snow globe
also not an overtly adrien song, but we get these lines in one of the verses:
"’cause all i hear is 'i love you so much' but it starts to mean nothing when my heart is shut from you my heart is shut from you my little tiny world is in your hands so shake it like a snow globe fuck my plans"
which talks about how the love adrien experiences as a famous model isn't the kind of love he wants - he wants feel loved by his father. but gabriel just uses him for the company - he holds adrien's tiny world in his hands, and uses that grasp to shake up adrien's world and disrupt the relationships adrien has with the outside world.
the secret life of me
this song is about fantasizing about running away to a new life, or to a secret life away from responsibilities, so like. adrien about how he's chat noir.
in the chorus, we get:
"sunbathe looking like a sunday wishing for a someday i could run away like that now i think i need a life or maybe 9 'cause i feel like i’m running out of time, yea
which plays on the ideas of running away. it's really fitting, i think, because of the reference to wanting 9 lives, which is definitely a pun adrien would make as chat noir
american graffiti
this is another song about struggling with being in the spotlight, which relates to adrien. in the chorus, we get:
"yeah, you've been reading all about me and you're loving what you found i'm like american graffiti you want some glitter, drink it down yeah, you've been seeing all about me taking notes, yeah, write it down i'm like american graffiti if you need me, i'm here now if you need me, i'm here now"
which relates to the themes brought up during dream boy: we have this circumstance of people finding adrien, learning all there is to possibly know about him, and deciding that they love this version of him they see in the media. the "if you need me, i'm here now" also refers to the dream boy theme because of how this version of adrien that exists in most people's heads will always be there to comfort them and "love" them in a parasocial relationship.
fruit roll ups
fruit roll ups is yet another adrien-loving-ladybug song in which he talks about wanting to invite her over so they can watch movies together and also how much he feels for her.
in the first verse, we get the lines:
"when you talk it's in cursive to me and it's nicer than anything i'd believe about me it's like that shit was written in gel pen and i love those"
which is not. super important but it's cute! also the line "and it's nicer than anything i'd believe about me" also might refer to the way ladybug reassures him of his placement as a hero and a friend in her life, which are things he continually finds hard to believe. so it's also sad!
crying over it all
speaking of sad this last song is another adrien-loving-ladybug song and it is. sad.
the pre-chorus is:
"so practice your passion on me give me your 100 degrees i'll die off whenever you need an afternoon just to breathe soon everyone will be gone they'll forget my albums, i hope you'll be here when it's done and i'm crying over it all, yeah"
first of all. i go insane every time i hear the line "so practice your passion on me." now that we've gotten that out of the way let's continue on. we have the line "I'll die off whenever you need" which refers to chat's tendency to sacrifice himself for ladybug during akuma fights, and these lines also express that familiar desire he has of wanting ladybug to stay beside him after the events of whatever will happen next actually happen.
and in the chorus, we have:
"and all i think about is where you might be and when i'm swallowed down i'd say it's for you, yeah, yeah, yeah, oh, oh i'd say it's for you, yeah, yeah, yeah"
which refers to how adrien wonders about ladybug when they're apart - he wants to know about her and how she spends her free time, but he can't know these things, not yet. and the line "and when i'm swallowed down / i'd say it's for you" would refer metaphorically (maybe sometimes literally) to the things he does during akuma fights for her to make sure they succeed.
and in another verse, we get:
"cherry red's your touch a touch i'm failing to feel, or feel enough to love you safely “who?”, “what?”, “when?”, and “why?” all drive me crazy please make me sane for you"
again using the phrase "cherry red" to refer to ladybug, her touch something that adrien can't feel enough of because their relationship is strictly platonic, but he wants more. he wants to know the 'who, what, when, where, and why's of her life, but he can't, and it drives him a little crazy. in contrast to being "stupid for her" back in double dare, he wants to be "made sane for her" so that he can have some feeling of peace in their relationship after getting rejected.
9. conclusion
the biggest conclusion we have here is that im insane. the second biggest conclusion we have here is that i have the amazing ability to project adrien onto a very large portion of waterparks' discography, and i'm right in doing so. an equally important takeaway is that adrien needs a hug and also that he loves ladybug. thank you for your time
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reymiart · 5 years ago
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Hawk’s true self
This is just me rambling about Hawk’s character because there’s just so much to theorize and talk about. it’s probably way too long and congested so I apologize in advance
In the first arc he’s introduced in, he keeps saying how he has no self control. He says this twice and even shows it at the billboard charts where he starts speaking his thoughts. But later on as the story progresses we see that Hawks has exceptional control of himself, more specifically his emotions and his behavior. He’s so good at hiding his true feelings that it’s the reason the commission chooses him to be a double agent with the league of villains. 
It’s likely that Hawks was trained as a child for this sort of espionage activity since he himself says that he was taught negotiation skills at an early age. This is why Endeavor can’t tell when he’s being serious because Hawks always acts jokingly around him. Hawks knows this, which is why he acted so serious when giving Endeavor the coded book to let him know something was off. Some say Hawks is a chaotic neutral, and that definitely fits with how he acted during the billboard awards. However you could say he is actually lawful neutral, and is someone who always gets done what needs to be done. He wanted to support Endeavor as the number one hero and he did whatever was needed to do so. In the same way, whatever the commission wants him to do, he gets done. I think it’s clear that there are two sides to Hawks, or Keigo Takami. The chaotic and easy going hero persona, and the lawful and controlled commission pawn. I personally think that the easy going persona is how hawks really feels or how he wants to be, but after being drilled into what is essentially a child soldier, he can’t shake off what he has been trained into becoming. 
One aspect that I find interesting is how baby Keigo says he wants to be like Endeavor, but as an adult he insists that he wants the freedom of the lower ranks and that his “back isn’t wide enough”. I think this is a combination of realizing that the hero world isn’t all what he thought it was (”there are no true heros”) and knowing that as a commission pawn, his role is to work in espionage which isn’t suited to the number 1 hero. His desire that he wants all heroes to “take it easy” and how he wants to be lower in the ranks could be hinting at how he’s actually secretly tired of working for the commission or even being a hero since it’s not what he signed up for (he got roped in when he was like 4 there’s no way he knew what he was signing up for). I think Keigo definitely enjoys being a hero and wanted to be a hero, but baby keigo specifically said “shine brightly”. He wanted to shine brightly like Endeavor but instead he’s being forced to hide in the shadows and constantly lie to be people, which he stated he dislikes doing. He’s not doing the double agent job because he wants to, he’s doing it because he “has no choice” which are is own words. Heroes normally have a choice when it comes to jobs, don’t they? They are free to choose what kind of hero they want to be. But Keigo never had a choice. He owes his life and success to the commission and has been groomed to stay loyal to them. He’s a bird locked in a cage, and he even tells this to twice when asked why he sympathizes with the villains. I don’t think he was lying because the easiest way to lie is when there’s truth mixed in. And Hawks genuinely liked twice.
Now to the recent events in the manga, where things get interesting. Hawks has been getting some heat with what he did to twice but I think this moment is what solidifies all my speculations and everything I said up until this point. Hawks is good at controlling himself. However in these chapters you can see him slowly breaking down. He desperately tries to hide this fact by outright stating things like “I don’t get attached” when dabi calls him out for getting attached right after, and being very forceful and distant when facing twice. I won’t get too much into this scene cause I’ve seen other people do a better job at analyzing it and this is my first time writing about a show, ever, but basically Hawks is having difficulty separating his emotions from his duty. This is the first conflict we see between true easy going hawks and loyal commission hawks. However in the past we haven’t seen much evidence as to how connected or manipulated Hawks is with the commission. For all we know he could have been working for them willingly or quit whenever he wanted to. That all changes with all the bombshells this chapter, including baby hawks, which I talked about in the previous paragraph. With this scene, we have come to realize what the commission really means to hawks. He’s so desperate to keep his loyalty to them that I think he’s behaving rather strangely with twice and not as any other hero would. I think a normal hero would have thought that if they can’t capture him now, they would retreat and ambush them later (considering dabi in close quarters is a horrible match up for hawks and he knows it) but hawks is thinking, “If he doesn’t give up I need to *kill* him.” I don’t think any hero in bnha so far has “killed” a villain or even thought to “kill” a villain (nomus are basically dead already so that doesn't count). It’s always been defeat and capture. I’m sure Hawks could knock him unconscious but he’s desperate and tries to make up for his wavering loyalty by killing twice, the exact opposite of what he truly wants to do. He finally breaks when dabi calls his real name “Keigo Tamaki”, the name the commission forced him to abandon. The reminder of his true self is what caused Hawks to waver so much in loyalty that he went straight for the kill, almost to kill any last remaining chances of letting his emotions take over. This is what I mean when I said this moment is what solidifies my theories on his character. The commission means so much to him, or has manipulated him so much that in order to keep his loyalty to him, he kills someone he thought was a good person. This just shows how deep the brainwashing has gone to Hawks. Why is he so desperate to keep his alignment with the commission? Because he has no identity outside of them. They have guided and controlled him his entire life and as much as he wants to be free, he’s been trained to never betray them. He’s a man that does whatever it takes to get things done and in that moment he thought he had to stop twice, stop his wavering loyalty, stop his questioning of heros.
tldr; Hawks wanted to be a hero that shines brightly but the commission forced him to become the opposite, making him see hero society for what it really is, a corporate industry for money and fame. He seemingly accepts this, seeing how he talked about the importance of popularity at the billboard awards, but Endeavor still holds a sentimental place in his heart as a great hero that shines brightly. This explains why he doesn’t like all might, he sees him as a “too perfect” hero, almost too good to be true, while endeavor breaks down barriers, even when it’s impossible. Also Hawks has a bias against Endeavor because he saved him as a kid. 
Well this got off track real fast, *real tldr;*: Hawks has two sides to him which worked together, as easy going hawks just accepted his own situation, and the fact that he’s a pawn for the commission. The commission are the good guys so he doesn’t really care that they control him. He’s just that selfless of a guy. However after having to betray people he likes, his morality and sense of loyalty wavers and in the end his commission self overwrites what he truly wanted to do.
This is important because the commission self needs to be established as the one controlling Hawks before his character can get broken down and get development, and in the end his true self can prevail and he can be free.
I have always got the feeling that Hawks is a selfless person. He got roped into being the kind of hero he didn't want to be but accepts it because he knows the heros are the good guys and in the end he's helping people. It doesn't matter that he's not where he truly wants to be. He's been so brainwashed by the commission that he believes his own feelings don't matter either.
I’m looking forward to how the story goes but I almost don’t want to get my expectations too high in case things go nothing the way I expect. It’s going to be torture waiting for season 5 to come out. Even the weekly chapters are starting to be torture lol 
also im so sorry this is so messy and unedited and I don’t even like writing I’m an art student not an english major so there’s probably grammatical errors but I just had to get all my thoughts down. If you actually read till the end you’re a madman and I love you.
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lordseochangbin · 5 years ago
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seo changbin x reader— enemies to lovers, diss track au! fluff & angst
a/n: ok there were some points where i felt iffy but i LOVE this idea and omg i love this sm im 🥺
in your seventeen years of living, you never enjoyed the number of comparisons your parents made between you and the boy next door.
he was just a few years older than you were, always mocking you for still being underaged and leaving you to spit out bullshit such as “im 18!! if you count the time i spent in my mother’s womb!”
it’s like he purposely did it to rile you up, but of course you got him back everytime. changbin being the most “popular music major” at school made him very much secretive and since you two knew each other from a young age, you were his weakness. you held his secrets, his past. that’s what made you powerful in this relationship stirred up from hate and jealously.
that, and your ability to compose amazing music.
it was another day at the school’s music studio. the professor understood you and changbin had some sort of misunderstanding so it was a priority that you two never shared a room, but mistakes happen i suppose.
you sat on the black leather chair, rocking it back and forth as you found yourself lost in your thoughts. “what should i write this song about...” you thought to yourself, chewing a pen cap between your lips.
you replayed the music over and over again. it was beautifully composed and you were quite impressed with yourself, however it didn’t hit the voices nor the raps of any music majors so you decided to call it a draft.
your cursor lingered towards the “draft” button before the door could burst open, revealing a boy in his usual black tee, sweats and shoes.
“get out” you said with a stern voice, eyes focused on the screen as you could already tell who it was
“geez... okay okay. what are you working on dumbass?” he said, resting his hands on the headrest of your seat as you stared at the screen
“it’s none of your business changbin” you remarked, clicking the draft button before the track could auto-play
you quickly rushed to pause the song before changbin could grab your wrists, staring at the blank page who’s title matched the title of the track
“some shitty music this is” he smirked, slamming the pause button so hard it made you jump in your seat
“try listening to your own music” you said, shoving him to the side and hiding your lyric book
changbin grabbed the desk behind him to regain balance, hurrying over to you as he grabbed the book in your hand
“what’s this? hmm? your love songs about me?” he smirked
your pretend-gagged in your mouth, grabbing the book from his hand and slapping his arm with it.
“stop bothering me you prick!”
“stop bothering me you prick!! mehhh” he mocked, his voice in a high pitched tone as winced his eyes at you.
everyday went like this. was he destined to annoy you? destined to be the only fault in your life with no mercy. he just enjoyed the way you scrunched your nose, the way you punched his stomach, the way you kicked his shin. god, he loved making you angry and he loved seeing you struggle.
changbin dodged your book this time before you could wack him, and assuming he was done with his daily business you went back to your seat. forgetting everything that happened seconds ago before a sudden reminder could be heard tingling down your ear
“you know y/n, why can’t you just like me?” he asked, his finger teasingly caressing the side of your cheek
“every girl wants me, yet you... i just don’t get you” he continued, pointing at you to show how much “you stood out”
you rolled your eyes, not having any of it at the moment. but you had to admit it, your heart was beating out of your chest and something in you was telling you to go for it. he’s right there, just one inch away from his lips and you could-
“exactly, take a hint seo changbin. i can’t, and i won’t ever like you” you spat in his face, forcing him to seperate his hands from your heated cheeks.
“alright, alright chill” he said in a somewhat teasing voice, “but you know you want to be mine. ill make sure of it”
“me? with your cocky ass? bet”
“it’s not like i want to be with you either y/n” he said, leaning against the desk as you looked at you for any reaction. you were as still as a statue however, and this didn’t go unnoticed by changbin. in fact, he was a bit worried when he didn’t hear a response from you.
you simply blinked, your eyes drawn to the floor as his words transcript itself into your head. he never wanted to be with you, he never wanted to be with you.
“hey, y/n you good?” he said, nudging your shoulder a bit
you woke up from your sudden day dream before turning back to your computer and ignoring his presence as you always did. but changbin wasn’t finished, he pressed the play button to your recent track.
“stop it, i can’t figure out the lyrics to this yet” you said. changbin raised an eyebrow at your plain stated response before he could smirk
“ill help you out with that”
changbin waits for the beat to replay, his eyes looking directly into yours as he twirls your chair so you’re looking at nothing more than the “rap god of music school spearb”. your breath increases as you are forced to look at him in his place, where he paced back and forth thinking of lyrics before he could spit something out.
your eyes watched as changbin took over each beat, his hands moving around to fit syllables with notes and his eyes deadlocked on you to make sure you took down every word. yes, it was offensive. yes, it was beyond talented. yes, did he so fucking hot as he brushed his fingers through his hair, his eyes now on the roof as he tried to think of lyrics to continue. but what hit you the hardest was when he pointed out how cold-hearted you were in the middle of your rap.
to be clear, he said “hey y/n youre cold hearted, like elsa farted. ‘let it go’ when you’re around me,your period hasn’t started” (A/N: I AM SO SORRY SKSK I WANTED TO HAVE FUN WITH THIS LMFAOO)
these lyrics made you laugh at first, but when you realized what he meant it remained drilled in your head. as the song went on his lyrics become more and more serious, more and more meaningful. you sat back in your seat, not even paying attention to what he was saying. you just watched him. his every moment. you eyed him from top to bottom as your heart beat started to pace a little faster. 
changbin poured his heart out in this moment. he wanted to let you know of these mixed feelings he was having. i mean, geez y/n, why were you always such a bitch to him? for no fucking reason? that’s why he decided to ignore his own feelings and bully you for now on. you hated him anyways. but as the song went on, he was tired of rapping about your imperfections (that he tried so hard to make up). he wanted to confess his love in words you could understand, and now that he had your attention he focused on doing just that. only until the music could stop.
“y/n... y/n? you pressed the pause button”
you turned around to find your elbow on the space bar. “oh.. oh! my bad i’m... oh what am i saying” you muttered to yourself before turning to him.
“get out!!” you said, standing up to push him out the door.
“okay, okay” changbin put both hands up in surrender
you shut the door in a hurry, your back slamming against it as you clutched onto your shirt. there was a burning pain there, it felt like your chest was collapsing upon itself. you never felt like this before. was it the fact that he was rapping about you? was it the insults? did it offend you THAT much? you rolled your eyes, your back slowly sliding down until your body met the floor as you finally met a steady heartbeat.
“it’s cause i like you, fucking idiot. and you call me cold-hearted?” you said, thinking back on his lyrics.
“we’ll see about that”
————-
a smug expression fit your mood as you walked down the halls, each step pulling you closer to lordseochangbin music school’s courtyard. changbin and his “rap” friends typically hung out around there and girls crowded them in awe of their looks. 
your dark eye circles drooped down low, you spent all night in distress. did he not like you? he liked you? his words hurt your petty heart, to say the least. you wanted to come up with excuses to answer this burning feeling. what was this feeling? 
it came down to feeling confused, amazed, happy, heartbroken. they all seemed jumbled up and all you could think about was throwing it into words. all night you focused on your new diss track dedicated to the one and only seo changbin. you wanted to show him you weren’t just bitching around when you said you hated him. you meant it. in all honesty you loved him, and all he did was bully you around for it. 
god, to call you a bitch like that? that hit different. you pushed through the mob of girls, standing confidently before changbin as he looked up from his laptop to see you.
“y/n...” he said, unconsciously handing his laptop to jisung to give you his attention. his hands rested on his knees before he could stand up, the crowd tensing around you
“god, here goes the typical y/n and changbin stand-off. power of the two rap lyrical writers” someone said behind you.
yes it was a typical scene, you and changbin causing scenes everywhere around campus. but this one felt different. this scene felt like it would leave a rough patch.
“changbin, just wanted to return what you gave me last night” the vagueness in your words threw everyone off, including changbin’s friends
“what? a good night lyrics to complete your song?” he smirked, taking a daring step towards you.
the close proximity made you stutter a bit before you could take out your laptop from your backpack and expose a rough draft, something you found on changbin’s drive
“wait.. isn’t that my draft music?” he asked, his eyes glaring at the screen before turning back to you
“exactly, now im gonna give you a piece of your own medicine”
--------------
you slinged your backpack over your shoulder and you walked away from the crowd. god, that was embarrassing. it was different to say the least, the crowd cheered you on but their support didn’t matter. what mattered the most was the way changbin’s eyes glared at you the whole time. he didn’t bother to make out the words you were saying but he knew exactly what you were doing.
one thing changbin couldn’t get himself to realize was your motive? why were you literally spitting bars at his face? 
he stared blankly as you left thinking not only did you attack his height, his rap style, and his skills-- you attacked his heart.
---------------
the next day he never came around to your studio. to ensure you weren’t sharing this time you checked the schedule for the booked room everyday but you never found his name. you knew he was around because of the gossip about him and his new single with his mates, but you never saw him on campus. 
when summertime came around you were excited to come home as well, hoping to see the same boy next door but you were more than heartbroken to find out the seo family had moved out. his absence was a daily reminder of the mistake you made. you should’ve confessed way sooner.
---------------
a year passed before changbin could find himself backstage, his palms sweaty from the nervousness that had been piling over him these past few days. it was a small debut, but he knew every one of his fans were anticipating this. 
you, on the other hand, had no idea what was going down until a group of girls jumped ahead of you in the lunch line.
“hey y/n! you didn’t hear about 3racha’s debut? i guess changbin was debuting first after all” the girl giggled. your mouth dropped at the sudden statement.
“changbin.. he’s..he’s debuting?!”
“yeah! his stage is tonight!” the other girl replied, “do you wanna join? i have an extra ticket”
you grabbed the palm of the girl’s hands, giving it a squeeze in gratitude. “wow, thank you. thank you dude” 
“you welcome” the two girls smiled before you could exchange numbers. 
today was the special day, huh? you thought to yourself. it was the day he always teased you about, the typical “just wait till i’m famous, then you’ll like me!” he always bragged
you laughed like an idiot just thinking about it.
------------
later that day you decided to pass some time on twitter, searching changbin in the small text box in order to get any information on his debut. luckily, the tag was filled with posts and articles about 3racha. you learned a couple things from this which explained so much about the past year. his disappearance: he was transdered into a popular company called jyp, which was the same company he was debuting in. the company building was also 200 miles away, which may have explained why the seo family had moved. it seemed all too coincidental however, but only left one spot blank in your unfilled answer sheet. why did he never say goodbye? (a/n: bruh “never say goodbye” is the lyrics to the stray kids ost that changbin helped write... anyways continue)
you jumped into a taxi with the two girls, all bubbly and giggly as you chit-chatted inside the car. the girls ensured you wore an outfit that was a bit out of your comfort zone, a red-shimmery bodycon dress that hugged your waist tight. your figure shined the most in this outfit, and earned the top topic in your conversation with the girls as you talked about the usual “where and how” you got your outfit. 
200 miles, it took about two hours you supposed at the steady speed the taxi-driver went in. once two hours passed you couldn’t help but to ditch the conversation, a pit in your stomach slowly building as you anticipated changbin’s presence. what if he forgot about you? you thought about the question for a bit before concluding it would be best if he did forget about you. 
you entered the club, finding a table nearby the stage. as the three of you got seated you noticed a face peek out behind the curtains. if it wasn’t the look on his face, god that look on his face. you could see his shocked expression as he looked at you eye-to-eye. he never expected to see you here, in fact it was the last thing that crossed his mind but instead of making him more nervous your presence made him feel more at ease, more at home. 
three performances went by in a breeze, the crowd cheering on at certain parts that impressed even you. the lyrics were fun, having you jumping in your seat as swaying back and forth to the songs. but before you knew it the solo stages came on, changbin’s was up first.
the second he got on the stage his eyes scanned the crowd before they landed on you once again. a smug smirk fitted his face as the song started, chan and jisung looking over at changbin for the message that inspired the song lyrics.
“this one’s dedicated to the girl that broke my heart. there’s more to the story of course, and now that i think about it.. i think i should probably change my words up a bit” he laughed, taking chan and jisung by surprise before they could find you in the crowd as well.
“this song... it’s to the girl i loved.. and i hated the most. thank you for being there for me, whether you wanted to or not. thank you for.. dealing with my bullshit. for being my motivation and inspiration. you mean so much more than you’ll ever know, this one’s to you”
------
three minutes later you found yourself crying in the bathroom corner. you couldn’t tell if it was tears of joy or sadness. small sniffles was all changbin heard in the tiny room before he could knock on the door
“y/n, can i come in?”
“you would still come in even if i said no” you replied in the midst of tears, trying to wipe some off with your hand
“you’re right” changbin replied as he allowed the door to open by itself. he ran to you in a heartbeat, getting you on your feet and wiping the small droplets on your cheeks
“now why is my babygirl crying right now?” he laughed, leaning down to lock eyes with you 
“did you really have to address me as babygirl?! seriously, you pervert!” you slapped his chest as you continued crying “i’m only three years younger, THREE” you pointed three fingers out as he softly grabbed your wrists, pulling you closer
“ it was all i could think of in the moment, i’m sorry love”
“i mean if i was there to help you-”
“are we seriously going to argue right now” changbin interrupted, resting his forehead against yours. there it was. your heart doing that funky thing again. god your brain cells were just squirming in disgust.. this feeling of excitement, love, yuck! it was disgusting! you thought. but deep down, you really loved seo changbin. with every breath you could never take back the fact that you loved seo changbin.
“no...i just missed you so much” you mumbled, a stutter in the midst as you could feel changbin’s hot breath with the close proximity
“then will you shut up and let me kiss you now? please?” he whispered, his hands cupping your cheeks before you could nod in approval
“did you brush your te-”
“i said shut up” changbin said with a smile before your lips could meet with his. you immediately fell into his hands, yours wrapping around his broad shoulders as he picked you up by your waist. your thighs met the cold stone counter-top of the bathroom, changbin fitting in between your legs as you pulled him in for another kiss. changbin leaned back to meet your eyes again, “you know how long i’ve been waiting to do that?” he gasped, trying to catch his breath
“im sure you can write a song about it” you chuckled
changbin looked at the mirror behind you before turning around to find his bags on the floor. “actually....”
he leaned down to find his laptop inside. “i kinda already did?”
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diddlesanddoodles · 4 years ago
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DUMPLING ch 40
The dagger was nearly ten inches long from hilt to tip and it was heavier than she would have thought it should be. The leather of the sheath was smooth under her fingers and well made. She held it in her lap as the conversation of the others drifted overhead.
“I would have liked the chance to speak with her,” her mother was saying. She hadn’t touched her wine, though Keral was on his third glass and even the King was starting on his second. “If only to let her meet Haiyer.”
The news of Nonna and the others’ visit to the kitchen camp had made it to the King and to her mother and Warren had called for Nenani to discuss the matter. The presents that had been brought for her were in a small pile near her mother. But Nenani kept a hold of her dagger.
Keral had dropped by to give a report and ended up joining their conversation. Though he did not contributed much to it, rather he occupied himself with wine and playing with Haiyer; letting the little boy crawl over his arm or let him attempt to pull the glove off of the ranger’s hand. For her part, Nenani sat next to her mother, inspecting the dagger and lost in her own thoughts. She thought of Riley and how she regretted how their first meeting had gone and wished she could speak to him again. If only to know more about her father and his side of the family. Her family...
“I’ve always known Lady Nonna to be...quite free spirited,” said Warren, smiling into his goblet of wine. “She does what she pleases and asks for forgiveness afterwards with such sincerity you forget what angered you in the first place. Should she have been in possession of a more devious mind, she would be a real problem. But as it stands, she’s easily my favorite of the tribe elders to deal with. Her nephew, however...” He shifted, straightening his shoulders and tilted his head to the side. “Best to leave him to his Aunt and to Warrick.”
“Riley?” Keral asked, his brow furrowed and he smirked sardonically. “The boy’s a walking powder keg. Anything sets him off and he’ll be throwing around challenges like leaves in autumn. Warrick probably thought he was doin’ Nonna a favor by takin’ ‘im as a squire. Not sure how well that’s going fer him, but if half of what I heard about this mornin’s true...” he shrugged dismissively. “...not very well.”
“A pity he doesn’t take more after his Aunt,” Warren remarked. “They could do well with a few more elders such as Nonna.”
Keral barked a laugh, gently drawing his hand slowly across the desk as Haiyer clung to one of his fingers and giggling all the while. “That’s only because she’s still got a sense of humor. The rest of ‘em all seem to have some sort ‘a bet goin’ on as to who can scowl the longest. Warrick’s somewhere in the middle until ye get a bit a whiskey in ‘im and he’s the friendliest fella ye could ever meet. Pretty sure that’s why Gregis liked ‘im so much. Still, I say Warrick’s a far better choice to have replaced him than that Melahd fellow. I don’t think he know how to smile. Not sure why he’s so popular.”
“I’m sure he isn’t the only one who struggles with it. Riley, I mean,” Oira said. “Hayron did, certainly. He would get angry at the drop of a stone if something set him off. I remember once he dropped a jar and shattered all into pieces and he just...went off. I had to send him out to go cool off and he spent hours out in the dunes. Just swinging his sword and going through old drills and just...yelling.”
Nenani looked up from her dagger. “He did? Papa got angry...like Riley did?”
Oira nodded. “Yes. Especially after Halden found us and...told us all that happened. Even though he had been released from duty, Hayron was still deeply loyal to my father and family. Halden barely spoke for nearly a month. They both felt as though they had failed their oaths.”
“I don’t remember them being angry,” Nenani said.
Oira smiled. “That’s because they made you their new oath.”
The dagger in her hands felt heavy and meaningful and she wished not for the first or last time that is had been her father to have given it to her.
“I can’t help but feel as though Nonna was avoiding me,” Oira said then, turning the conversation. “I understand why she might feel...awkward about it, but still.”
“That had been my first inclination,” Warren admitted, sipping at his wine and setting it down. His eyes flickered over to Nenani, the edges of his mouth curling into an amused smile. “But I also have an idea that it may also have something to do with the nature of one of their gifts.”
Nenani looked up as though sensing the conversation had drifted her way and she gripped the dagger possessively. “What?”
Oira looked over at her daughter and the dagger in her lap and frowned pensively. “Yes, about that...”
Nenani looked at her mother, seeming to sense where she was going. “I’m keeping it.”
With narrowed eyes, Oira sighed, and pinned Nenani with a look. “It’s not a toy, Nenani. It’s a weapon.”
“I know. Nonna said it was my first rite,” she replied with a frown. “She said Papa would gave given me one when I turned ten.”
Oira looked conflicted, eyes turning sad at the mentioning of her late husband. “I know, sweetie,” she said gently. “And yes, he did speak of it once. I didn’t like the idea then and I still don’t like it now.”
“I’m still keeping it,” Nenani replied firmly and regarding her mother with a frown. Her eyes were unwavering, as though daring her mother to try and take the dagger from her. Oira watched her daughter, noting her expression and she did not seem too surprised by her daughter’s vehemence.
“Just...promise me you will be responsible,” her mother asked softly. “I don’t want to hear that you’ve cut your fingers off...”
“I’ll be careful. I won’t even take it out of the sheath,” Nenani promised, smiling at her. Nenani had expected more of a fight, but it made her happy to see her mother understood so readily why she wanted to keep it.
“You’ll be needin’ a proper belt to hang it on then, lass,” Keral said and then gestured to the roll of leather. “Ye should go see Connar and see if he won’t make ye somethin’ nice with that there.”
Nenani looked at the roll of leather and then turned to Keral. “Do you think he would?”
“Connar doesn’t get the chance to do much work fer humans these days,” Keral said. “I’m sure he’d love the chance to work on something that isn’t fixin’ or mendin’ guard armor.”
“He is very good at what he does,” Warren added. “A true craftsman. A pity his skills are so underutilized.”
“And ‘a course Rheil could show ye a few tricks with yer dagger there,” Keral offered with a sly grin, plucking Haiyer up and passing the boy idly back and forth between his hands as though demonstrating with him acing as living baton. “The Captain’s real handy with a short blade.”
“I don’t think so,” Oira was quick to say, looking at Nenani with a meaningful eye. “You need to concentrate on learning to control your fire. You may keep the dagger, but I draw the line at you learning combat,” Oira then turned to look at Keral with a scowl. “And I swear to the Gods, Keral, if you drop my son I will have boots made out of your hide.”
“Ah, the pup’s fine,” Keral replied, lifting the breathlessly giggling human boy and setting him on top of his large head. “See? Perfectly safe.”
Oira glared at the ranger.
“Mama, look!” Haiyer said, getting to his feet and using strands of Keral’s long hair to keep himself upright. Oira huffed nervously through her nose. But Keral had enough good sense to put the boy back down onto the solid ground of the desk before his mother began to spark at him. Much to said boy’s disappointment. “Aw...”
Warren regarded the little boy with a warm smile.
“Can’t ye just imagine it though? The lass masterin’ both mage fire and a blade?” Keral asked Oira with a smug grin. His green eyes moved to Nenani as he lifted his cup. “Seven hells by the time yer grown lass, ye’d be a real force to reckon with. Feelin’ sorry for whatever poor love struck sob tries to woo ye.”
Oira suddenly grinned. “Speaking of love,” she said, turning to regard the King with an amused glint in her eye. “I had a very interesting conversation with Queen Rosanna this morning.”
Warren raised an eyebrow, looking the faintest bit concerned. “...oh?”
“Yes,” her mother said with a slight nod. “Her majesty asked me if I had put any thought towards the arranging of possible marriage suitors...” she paused deliberately, eyeing the Vhasshalan King. “...for Nenani.”
Keral snorted into his cup, splashing wine onto his face and shirt and Haiyer gave a startled cry when several fat drops landed on his head. Warren tried to suppress a grin and hide it by lifting his goblet and taking a drink. Nenani looked at her mother with a look of incredulity. “Huh?”
Keral was trying to cough and laugh at the same time.
“Yes. She does seem to have a once track mind lately. I’m afraid she’s already broached the topic with me as well. Concerning Jae,” Warren said with a chuckle. Nenani’s head whipped around to the King, eyes wide and incredulous and he laughed at her horrified stare. “Not in regards to you, Nenani. Only that she feels it’s time we start to consider his future and begin the search. He is sixteen now.”
“And what did the brat have to say about that?” Keral asked, pulling a handkerchief from inside his coat pocket and wiping his face and then used a clean corner to wipe off Haiyer’s wine dampened hair.
Warren sighed with a wry smile. “I’ll let you know once I’ve spoken to him.”
Nenani felt warm around her ears and then her mother ran a hand down her head, pulling her fingers through her hair. “Don’t worry. I would never force a marriage on you, Nenani. Besides,” she added with a glare. “You’re far too young for such things to even be on your mind or anyone else’s. Though I do not believe her majesty meant any offense in asking. If there is one thing I will fight to the death over it’s the forcing of my child into a political marriage. I won’t let her become someone’s pawn.”
“I’m afraid that is just how life at court is,” Warren said with a resigned sigh. “I was only six when they began looking for a wife for me. But I wasn’t just the spare son. I was the spare’s spare’s spare. So though I was a Prince, I wasn’t considered all that great a match. Until I was the only son left that is.”
“It just seems so...terrible to do that to your child,” Oira said. “Spending them like currency...”
“It is,” Warren agreed grimly. “And it’s why if Jae objects to any of it, I have no intention of forcing him. Much for the same reasons as you, Annie. I don’t want him become someone’s pawn in a power play.”
“The last thing that boy would ever find himself caught up in would be a power play,” Keral laughed. “They could try till their gums bleed, but if Jae ain’t in the mind to do it, he’ll just bugger off.” He took a long drink from his cup, draining it. “Not that a King’s ward could give them all that much influence anyway.”
“That is true. For now at least,” Warren said, looking serious and Keral eyed his King curiously. Meeting the ranger’s eyes, Warren said, “I have discussed it with Rosanna extensively these last few weeks and...I intend to formally adopt Jae and give him my name.”
If Keral had not finished his wine, he would have spurted it all over himself again. “What? When?”
“I had thought to do it on the solstice.”
Keral leaned forward, resting his arm on the desk and regarding the monarch with a stern eye. Even Oira was seemed apprehensive.
“Ye sure ‘bout this, Warren? Folks seemed alright enough with ye keepin’ him as yer ward. They could just fool themselves in ‘ta thinkin’ ye’d gone mad and made a pet of the boy. But makin’ him a prince is a whole other matter.”
“Jae is my son, Keral,” Warren said firmly. “And I want my people and our history to acknowledge him as such. Rosanna stands behind me in this. When our baby is born, they will be the crowned heir. But I want Jae acknowledged as my son and a Prince of Vhasshal.”
Keral watched Warren for a moment with a steady stare and then after a time, he leaned back into his seat and smiled with a nod. “That boy’s got a head the size of a cannonball and ye wanna go and put a crown on it,” Keral chuckled. “But aye. I’m with ye, Warren. He’s more Vhassal than Silvaara now anyway.”
The King was visibly relieved. “Thank you, my friend.”
“You must love that boy very much,” Oira said with a warm smile.
“I owe Jae everything,” replied the King. “He doesn’t believe me when I tell him, but...I don’t think I would have been nearly as successful in bringing Vhasshal back from the brink if I didn’t have him and Keral by my side. They’re worth more to me than every gold ingot in the treasury and more.”
“Don’t see ye goin’ outta yer way to make me a prince,” Keral quipped, pouring himself another glass.
Warren smirked at the ranger. “Would you like to?”
“Fuck no!” said the ranger with scoff, setting back in his seat and bringing the cup to his lips. He paused and gestured with his cup towards the King. “I’d be content with a raise, though.”
Warren laughed. “We shall see.”
Keral then turned to smirk at Nenani and Oira. “And just think: with Jae bein’ a prince, when the lass comes of age,” he said with smug grin. “Ye can marry the both of ‘em and reform the alliance between Silvaara and Vhasshal.”
Her mother was laughing, but Nenani was not.
“What?” Now Nenani felt distinctly warm and Keral’s grin widened.
“Ah. Yer blushing there, lass,” he said. “Ye really are sweet on that boy, after all. Ain’t ye?”
“No!” She shot back with a little more volume and force than she meant and her blush deepened. Both her mother and Warren were looking at her with surprise and Keral could not have looked more smug if he had been a cat who caught the king of rats.
“Can we talk about something else?” She demanded of the room, not looking at anyone. Her stomach roiled with mortification as they all laughed. But thankfully after a moment, Warren turned the discussion onto another topic.
“Annie, would you consider joining Rosanna and Jae and myself for dinner one night in the great hall? I will be addressing the Lords and I would very much like to have you there.”
Her mother looked started. The moment she and Haiyer had come to Vhasshal, they had taken all their meals in their private room and barely spoke to anyone beyond Lolly and the few other servants that sought to their daily needs. To dine in the great hall meant being in the presence of fifty plus giants all in the same room. Many of those attending would be the Lords and Vassels of court. People of great importance and influence.
It was a disquieting prospect.
“I...if you wish me there,” she said finally, but she appeared very reluctant. “I will be happy to.”
Warren nodded. “I do. There are things being said around court and I want to address them and make myself perfectly clear where the Crown stands in regards to them.”
…………………………………
There was not a single soul to be seen as Maevis carried her through the hallways and Nenani yawned greatly, leaning back against him and trying to slip back into sleep. Something tapped her head and she opened her eyes to see his finger hovering over her.
“Sorry, my dear, but I can’t have you falling to sleep on me,” he told her with a bright smile and she groaned. How could he possibly be as jovial as he looked at such an early hour? “You’ll need to be awake for your lesson.”
“But why so early?” she whined, rubbing her eyes. “Even Farris doesn’t get up this early...”
“True enough. We still have a little over an hour before that,” Maevis replied with a laugh. “But, Quinn will be waiting for us and I don’t think we should disappoint him.”
She stared up at him through tired squinting eyes. “Huh?”
“The repairs to the kitchen has been completed and Quinn will be lighting the new ovens for the first time this morning,” he explained and then pinned her with one amused honey colored eye. “Or rather, you will.”
Looking around, the halls as he moved, she was able to recognize where they were and sure enough, after a time, Maevis took a flight of stone stairs downward and he stepped down into the kitchen. An odd sense of longing pulled at her as she looked around.
The floor was different than she remembered, but most of it had to be replaced, so that was to be expected. The damage to the hearth was repaired and all the shelves were back, though they were empty. The tables had been brought in and many of the cooking pots and knives had been piled there. Near the archway, many of the chests and crates that had been in the tent were stacked up and ready to be put back in their proper places. And to her left she saw the ovens. Where there had once been three were now five and a new set of shelves had been built into the wall. Quinn was kneeling beneath one of the ovens and the square set chamber beneath them, shoving firewood into the space. Upon hearing Maevis’s footsteps, he rose to his feet and grinned at them. “’bout time ye showed up. Was just about t’start without ye.”
“Believe me, I would have been here sooner,” Maevis replied. “But you try to coax this one out of a warm bed at this hour and see how well you manage it.”
“Food, my dear fellow. Food. S’how we always did it,” Quinn said as he walked up to meet them, reaching into the pocket at the front of his apron and pulling something out. He held it out to Nenani and she looked down to see a small round piece of flat bread with something sprinkled on it. She took it and she could smell the cinnamon and clove.
“Sweet roll!” She cried out with glee and took a large bite, her mouth watering as the honey sweetened bread hit her tongue. It wasn’t a proper sweet roll, but she didn’t have enough in her to care.
Quinn laughed. “Not quite the same, but close enough, eh?”
She just nodded and took another bite.
“I will have to remember this,” Maevis said with an amused grin and sat her down onto the floor near the first oven’s burn chamber where Quin had been stacking wood.
The sweet bread was gone in minutes and did a decent job of perking Neanani up from the pulling grip of sleep.
“Where’s Kol?” she asked.
“Lettin’ ‘im sleep a little more,” Quinn replied as he squatted next to her. “Not that he’s said as much, but he ain’t been sleepin’ all that well last few days.”
“Because of what the serpents did?” she asked, concerned and guilt ridden. “Does he need to go see Yaesha?”
Quinn grinned down at her. “Lass, I’ve been tryin’ to get him to since it happened, but he swears he’s fine. He ain’t, but he swears it all the same. Kol’s more stubborn a mule when it comes to having to go see Yaesha few anythin’. Few yeas back he broke his arm after a pile ‘a wood collapsed on ‘im and Farris had to literally carry the bastard to go get it set. Yelled the whole way, swearin’ he was fine, but Farris wasn’t havin’ any of it. His arm was bent wrong and was purple.”
Nenani made a face. “Ow...”
Maevis frowned and shook his head. “That won’t do. Perhaps I should mention it to Yaesha that Kol would do well with a quick check up?”
Quinn grinned wickedly at the magician. “Well, Maevis. That would be awfully kind of ye.”
…………………….
“Now, for this lesson, we’re going to work on your endurance,” Maevis explained. Quinn stood to the side, leaning against the table and was content to watch the lesson unfold.
“You’re not going to charm the wood are you?” she asked pensively.
“No, I will not be charming the fire wood,” Maevis replied and then smiled. “At least not for today’s lesson. Now, do you know how these ovens work, Nenani?”
She opened her mouth to affirm that she did know how ovens worked, but paused when she realized...she really didn’t. Not entirely. In principal, yes. In actuality…
Quinn saw her puzzled look and chuckled. “No worries, Dumplin’. It’s a fairly simple design. These ovens are all built around a brick core where the actual bakin’ is done. The brick chamber is heated two different ways; by shoveling some burning wood inside and closing ‘em up for an hour or so and by heatin’ ‘em from below.  I do both as it heats the oven faster and more evenly. Especially when it gets t’be real cold and a sudden change of temperature could shatter the bricks. But once it’s up to temp, we sweep the ashes from the brick chamber while the fire below keeps everythin’ at temperatures all day and all I gotta do is make sure t’keep feedin’ it more wood.”
Nenani nodded her understanding. “So...I just need to light the wood on fire? That doesn’t sound too hard.”
Maevis peered at her over the top of his rimmed spectacles. “Surely you don’t think it would be so simple?”
“No,” Nenani admitted with a small smile and a shrug. “But I hoped it would...”
“No such luck, my dear,” he said. “No, your task will be to light the wood in the bottom chambers here, but there is a reason I am having you do this lesson now.”
“Normally, I’d just use a bit ‘a kindlin’ and a bellows to get the fire going,” Quinn said with an easy shrug. “But it rained last night and got a good bit of my kindlin’ and wood got all wet and it’s right useless. So yer just gonna have t’blast the buggers with yer flames till it dries out the wood enough for it to light. And we got five ovens needin’ to be lit.” He gave her a devilish grin and clapped his hands. “So get to it, lass. Chop chop.”
Maevis cupped his hand around her back and tapped a finger against her chest, his expression serious and warning. “Now, Nenani. If at any point during this lesson you feel the need for a rest, tell me and we shall stop. This will be much more draining than your first lesson and I won’t have you fainting on me. Understand?”
She nodded. “I will.”
Maevis nodded. “Good.”
“Aye. Wouldn’t do at all fer Farris to walk in right as ye dropped to the floor now would it, Dumplin’?” Quinn remarked. “He’d have poor ol’ Maevis here ripped t’pieces and then we’d have to tell the King he’ll be needin’ a new magician.”
“Yes, let us avoid all that unpleasantness, if you please.”
It started off quite simple, much to Nenani’s surprise. The fire pulled smoothly and easily and as soon as the flames hit the wood, steam began to rise up as the moisture from within began to boil and hiss away into fragrant clouds of mist. It was becoming easier for her summon real fire rather then the harmless mage fire that was much more natural. But almost a minute in, the first pile of wood was still steaming away and she was beginning to feel the drain. The second minute passed and she had to stop. With her hands planted on her knees, she panted and struggled to regain her breath. Maevis rubbed a finger along her spine and murmured encouragements to her. “Remember, this is about endurance, not speed.”
And so it went on. After ten minutes and two more breaks, the first oven was lit and beginning to burn nicely. But Nenani looked at the other ovens with a sense of dread. With Maevis and Quinn encouraging her onward however, she summoned enough fortitude to turn to the next one. And the next. And the next. But after the fourth oven was finally burning as it should, Nenani was left sitting on the floor, drenched in sweat and panting.
“Hm,” Quinn said, staring down at her and flicking a worried look to the other giant. “I dunno, Maevis. Four might be all she’s got in her.”
“I believe you’re right,” Maevis replied, reaching down and carefully scooping her up. “You did very well, Nenani. Your control is much improved. But I think we’re done for today.”
She nodded absently, her head already drooping as the pull of sleep tugged at her mind.
…………………………….
The skeletal form of the mage stood in front of her, blank sockets for eyes seeming to study her and she could do nothing but stare back. The amulet – his amulet, felt heavy against her middle.  
“A flower withers in its vase when pulled from the earth,” he said. “The thorns protect and hold the flower up. Without one, the other dies.”
“I’m sorry,” she said, holding up the amulet. “Maevis took this from you. But he said I needed it help me control my magic. I’m still learning, but I promise I’ll give it back. I only need it for a little longer. I’m getting better at it. The magic, I mean.”
Though he no longer had lips to do so with, it seemed to Nenani as though the skeleton mage was...smiling.
“The flower is still wild,” he said, sounding amused. “The thorns are strong. Trust in what the earth has blessed you with, child...”
He reached out and touched her cheek with a bony hand.
“...and his machinations will never uproot you.”
………………………………….
She awoke to the smell of yeast and fire and flour, the sound of the wooden peels pulling in and out of the ovens and the pleasant chatter of familiar voices as they worked. Laying atop a flat surface, cushioned by the folded fabric of an apron, she began to stir. Somewhere far off to the right of her, she heard Herit laugh. Avery was singing again and Saen was begging him to stop.
She opened her eyes slowly to find her field of vision blocked by a grayish green tunic and clean white apron. Turning her head up, she met Farris’s expectant gaze with a bleary eyed stare. The edges of his mouth curled into a grin.
“And just what in the seven hells am I meant t’be doin’ with ye, eh?” he asked her, pinching her arm lightly. “Come in here findin’ ye passed out like a drunkard after the solstice.”
She yawned and stretched. “Maevis had me light the ovens,” she said as she rubbed her eyes. “I only could do four though...the wood was wet.”
“Aye,” he said, looking over his shoulder to peer at the new ovens. All five were roaring away and bread, proper bread, was being unloaded into the baskets. “Was fully expectin’ to come in here and find Quinn still tryin’ to get it all goin’. But ye seemed to have done just fine. Seems t’ave done ye in though, eh?”
“It takes a lot more concentration to burn stuff than to just makes mage fire,” Nenani said, sitting up. “I have to...like...be angry. Kind of. It’s hard to explain. I just think about Aidus and it’s a lot easier.”
Farris’s huffed a laugh. “That so?”
She nodded. “Yeah.”
“Well, can’t say the thought of that fucker don’t light a fire in my belly either,” he said, reaching out to scoop her up, apron and all. “But since yer down here takin’ up my valuable table space, we’re gonna put them little hands to work.”
She yawned again and laid her head against his chest. “Okay...”
“...and it ain’t more sleep,” he said, tapping her head with a meaty finger. “Sun’s up, Dumplin’ and so should ye be.”
“The sun may be up,” she quipped. “...yet I am still sleepy.”
For a small moment, Farris looked as though he were going to be cross, but he paused as a thought struck him and he shrugged. “All right then.”
Nenani blinked. “Huh? Really?”
Farris nodded as he walked over to the large table in front of the hearth. Several of the chests were stacked beside it with their contents unloaded onto the table. Avery and Herit were working the new spit roasting mechanism with a few mutton carcasses. Or rather Avery was and Herit was feeding the smallish fire below to make sure it was an appropriate size for the meat they were roasting. Farris sat her down on the table between several pottery crocs and bundles. “Aye. If yer that tired go on and take a rest,” he told her. His eyes narrowed as his mouth curled into a smirk. “Got a nice cocotte fer ye to sleep in an everythin’.”
Nenani sat up straight. “I’m awake.”
Behind her, Avery and Herit were laughing.
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nessaiscute · 4 years ago
Text
A high school confession
AN: This is an experiment might make a bigger thing bout of this also its time for some fluff
“Try not to embarrass yourself.” Stated Mab as I left the Castle.
Same old bs, never a ‘good luck’, or, ‘do your best.’ Always about the kingdom and my eventual inheritance, I will rule the Ice court, I will make descions that will affect millions of people. Knights will depend on me, servants will want guidance. Other courts will want to challenge me. Seems…. A lot for someone like me. A teenage fairy, but it is the life I have to lead once i graduate. But thats not till a long time down the road at least a year. 
I got on the carriage and we went to the human world, to the high school I attend.
 The carriage pulled up to Fallbrook high school, not too bad of a school. I mean we have our bully issues and teachers don’t really care but we don’t have to worry about Gangs. The leaders of the nevenever make sure of that. It's a red brick building with a flagpole in the middle.When I got out of the carriage, I was greeted by a red haired boy. A summer fairy but a treasured one.
“Hey ice boy. Have you seen the princess?”
My nerves were instantly shot, “Do you not know where she is?”
“I… I saw her at breakfast but then i heard a welp and she vanished.”
Son of a bitch!!
I bolted straight into the building, people moving out of my way as I bulldoze into hall, Puck going after me.
“Ice boy! Slow down! You don’t know if shes in trouble!”
But I did, i knew exactly what happened. I knew that she was hurting her. I swer this time I’ll kill that freak!
My heart was beating faster then I thought it ever could, why am I reacting this way? Its not like this is the first time its happened. But I could barely keep track of her glamour, It was getting weaker and weaker. Gods no, please if there is any beings of higher power out there protect her. Please protect her…
Sure enough As i turned to the gym, a Black teeanger had blonde teenager in a choke hold. The blonde teeanger had tears forming in her eyes, my rage erupting like a volcano. My ice glamour exploded freezing everything around The black teeanger, she stepped on ice and fell on her butt letting the blonde go.
“Meghan!” I shouted and rushed towards her.
Meghan fell to the ground and I caught her, i scooped up her fragile body in my arms.
“Meghan! Talk to me!”
I heard a growl from behind me and Puck sheriked as I felt a fist lunge at me.
I tanked the blow,  everyone told me stories bout Tyras monster strength. Gangers won’t mess with her cause of how scary she is. But she didn’t impress me, her punch hurt but it was nothing I haven’t handled before. I shot an ice spike to get her to jump in the air. Tyra landed gracecfully on the ground.
“I’ve had enough of you getting in my way of beating retard!” Tyra snarled.
I told Puck to come over he did, I handed him Meghan and told the two to get out of here. They left. But by this point a crowd had gathered.
“Tyras gonna fight the ice prince!” Said a student.
“No, Tyras gona destory the ice prince. No one can handle Tyra.” Said a teacher.
Tyra cracked her knuckles grinning, “I’ve been looking forward to this, youre hot but youre too nice. Im going to fix that.”
“Is that right?” I smirked.
I slowly walked around, in a slow mocking matter. Bending my knee, her brown eyes glaring at me. People asked what I was doing, I walked around her slowly. Finally she shouted and lunged
I blocked her punch and pushed her off me, I did not strike her. She got ready for another punch, and she went through with her attack, this time she missed. I leaned out of the way, Tyra tried to bear hug me but I slide under her. 
“FIGHT ME!!” Tyra roared.
Suddenly an ice blast froze Tyra solid, I looked around and there was the principle. He glared at me.
“Mr. Johnson?” I asked surprised.
“What happened young man!” Mr. Johnson snapped.
“Tyra attacked Meghan Chase sir,”I replied, “I was defending my friend.”
Mr Johnson was trained by my mom to use Ice glamour, he takes no crap from any of the students and hes very strict. He puffed and singled for a cop.
“Take Miss Tyra away she will be expelled if Ash is…”
Suddenly Mr. Johnson’s phone rang, it was the nurse.
“What is it miss bells?”
“What? Miss Chase is unconscious?”
Everyone gulped.
“Everyone get to class! NOW!”
We all scattered.
I went straight to home room, I was sure I was going to get jumped Tyra was very popular. I know people were going to be pissed. In fact I got sneers and glares as I walked through the halls. I expected someone to try and deck me.
But I was greeted by Puck, who looked sad.
“Hey, how is she?”
“She won’t wake up ice boy. They called in an ambulance.”
Darn it!
I patted Pucks shoulder, “She’s been through hell before, she’ll get out again.”
Puck touched my hand and smiled at me, “Youre right.”
We both sat down, and class started. It seemed like nothing changed, Meghan was gone but no one seemed to care. Meghan was a huge part of all of our classes too. The teacher didn’t seem to notice that no one was answering questions besides me. Its normally me and Meghan.
“The left index.” I answered.
“Very good Ash.” The teacher replied.
A student laughed, “Man, I can’t believe that rere was holding Ash back.”
Bile rose in my throat, Meghan has had mental illnesses for as long as I remember. Its been the number one reason for her being bullied.
“Meghan wasn’t holding back anything I-”
“Rere!” The student snapped, “Gods how long have you been here? Learn the terminology fairy!”
“Meghan is not a ‘rere’ or whatever you call her. She's just as important to this class as I am.”
“Ugh, what is she? your girlfriend or something??” The student yelled
Everyone gasped like he just dropped an F bomb.
The teacher jumped in, “Anthony leave Ash alone. Theres no way he would date Miss chase. Now lets get back to the lesson.”
The class went on without a hitch though that accusation never left my mind.
What is she? Your girlfriend or something?
Did I see Meghan like that? She's been my friend for as long as I remember. She's my best friend. I feel content when shes around, when we’re cuddling and I can feel her heartbeat. When we’re watching a movie, when I’m fighting off bullies for her. I even defied my mom to be her friend, it was the one argument I ever won against my mom. Even as a king I will never abandon Meghan, I’ll run away from the throne if I have to I-
Oh. I am in love with her.
The class ended and I was called to the nurse’s office. I power walked there, my heart racing as I opened the door…
“You’re late.” Greeted Meghan.
The smile ran across my face before I realized it, “It took forever to get out of class.”
She opened her arms and I took her in mine.
“When Tyra grabbed me that time….I thought it was over.” She sobbed.
“I took care of it. Shes expelled.”
“Isn’t that only going to make things worse?” Meghan asked.
“Nope.” The nurse shook her head, “The students have gotten a clear warning. Anything happens to you over her jail will be next. Now, I have lunch to grab, you two stay here.”
The nurse left and it was just me and Meghan, my heart going into over drive. I wanted to tell Meghan how I felt. That I’m in love with her, I sat down next to her.
“Did you sleep well last night?” Meghan asked.
I nodded.
“Are you okay?”
“I… I need to tell you something.”
Now or Never.
“What is it?”
I took a deep breathe gathering my thoughts, It was time to face this.
“I love you.”
The words didn’t register right away, she just said, “huh?”
“I really love you.” I repeated.
Meghan gasped, her eyes smacked with shock. Did I make a mistake?
She looked down, my heart was bout to fall into the depths of hell when she said, “Um…. Can you give me some time to think Ash? After school, meet me at the front gate. I’ll see you then.”
Meghan then ran away and I just went to class.
“Man youre lame.” Puck stated.
“Shut up Summer shit.” I snarled.
“Seriously that was the best you could come up with? Although I’m honestly shocked this didn’t happen sooner.”
“Whats that suppose to mean?” I asked.
“Ive known you both for bout 5 years and from the moment I met you… Ive had to deal with the soft stares and cuddling and couple fights. I remember when Tyra first started bullying her, and she cried that no one was going to care if she died. And You got really mad at her and you both started yelling until you screamed ‘if you died I’d rip out her heart myself’ and you both stared at each other mouths agape till I had to bring up the newest book coming out.”
Puck was right, although it was embarrassing to hear him bring up the past.
“So, were you joking?”
I swatted at him, “Of course I wasn’t!”
Puck Patted my head, “Good luck lover boy!” 
He ran away before I could kill him.
I went to the front gate and Meghan was waiting for me.
“Hello Ash.” Meghan Greeted.
“Hey, Um, can I have your answer?”
My whole life hangs on this.
Meghan smiled softly, “I… was so happy when you told me. Thank you. But here is the thing…. I can’t believe you actually said it. and...I’m wondering if you made a bet with Michael. To see if it would be funny…. So i have to ask… were you joking?”
Tears were forming in her eyes when she asked if I was joking, what exactly do people take me for.
“No i meant it.”
“You… do know im not normal right??” Meghan asked shocked, “I’m not pretty like the other girls. I like dumb things and I can barely do anything right. And then there is the fact I'm on adhd medication. People will always judge me for that, I just doze off and I get mad quite easily; I annoy people very easily…. One of my favorite thing bout you is how patient you are with me. If…. we start dating that patience will be tested to its limit. You’ll have to deal with that stuff all the time. I… don’t want to be a pest to you.”
This foolish…
“You aren’t a pest Meghan!”
Meghan gasped and i kept going.
“Hell I love you doing those things, do them all the time. I don’t get those anime cartoons you watch nor do I understand shipping and all of that but I want to be with you every step of the way. As for your mental illness I love you, all of you, especially those parts. There's nothing you could do to make me lose my patience in you. Hell, I don't even consider it a test of patience. Being with you is a choice I make. I make it every day, and I’ll keep making it till the end of time.”
“Ash….” Meghan gasped, “Has anyone ever told you… that you're dangerous to a woman's heart.” her face was flushed.
“Do love me Meghan? Cause I can’t stand the thought of not being with you. I can do anything but losing you would destroy me.”
“Yes. I love you, Ash Please be my boyfriend.”
I walked towards her, took her face in my hands and kissed her. She coiled her arms around me and I crushed her to me. She was mine, Nothing will ever change that.
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gemstoneconstellations · 4 years ago
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I love your fanfics! And I was wondering do you have any tips for original fanfic writing or just writing fics in general?
wow this actually ended up a lot longer than i thought it would, but here we go!
Original fanfics, hmmmmmm....
What I generally do is base things off of my own personal experience. Like all my iida fics are stuff that happened between me and my husband before we got married. Can’t help falling in love fic with bakugo, that was a previous relationship i had (which there is more to that story). Caught with todoroki..... thats how i got out of a ticket with a cop and how i learned that when i half check someone out and half start thinking about what i would do to that fine man in uniform (curse my uniform kink) that i glare/make a suspicious face. and when he confronted me about what i was doing, ready to write some kind of ticket for whatever i was doing wrong, i was so embarrassed that i blurted out that i found him very attractive and what exactly was on my mind and how i wanted to take that uniform off him.... that has happened with a emt too, i missed the green light looking at his bulging biceps after he rolled up his sleeves to write on a clip board.... he waved and i proceeded to squat in my seat and slam my face against the stirring wheel. escape artist cat was actually a dream i had, someone was taking off my cat’s pretty ribbon collars and putting ugly ones on her and i woke up sooooo mad, but i turned that dream into a romance story (reality kuiper was taking her collars off herself cause she was a brat) Stories about yourself, no matter how small you think it is actually has great potential to become a fic.
its also okay to borrow ideas from other forms of media. I do. example, Silk Maiden, based off of  an old batman episode from the early 2000s. its completely okay to do that. I’m not saying copy and paste the exact scenes. Just take the premises and then change it. some examples, like the movie Brave is the Scottish version of Aladdin. the princess who wants to be free and live her life beyond her princess duties needs to get married and she is not having it and wants to change the rules and runs away to find something new. premise is the same but how the story is told is different, one denies every prince and find her own prince in the streets of her kingdom and the other finds a cake that turns her mom into a bear that helps them understand each other and appreciate each other more. a weeb example is isekais. There are sooooo many isekais. japan, Korea, and china are all mass producing isekais right now. the premises are all the same, someone from one world now in another world primarily thanks to magical truck-kun who is probably could be branded as a mass serial killer at this point. I read a lot and i love korean isekai romance novels. I have read an isekai where the character was a villain who then was reincarnated with the memories of her villainous previous life who decided to live her new life by repenting by helping others but guess what? truck-kun came in the form of a airplane crash and she wakes up again in her first life’s preteen body before she became a villain. I’m reading an isekai isekai, author of an isekai met truck-kun and woke up inside the body of one of her characters in her isekai novel. all the same premise but told in a different way. i want to write an isekai for bnha! take a premise and write what you wanted to see happen between those characters if they were in that situation.
same for some fanfics, like you read a fanfic and you like the story that you read but you wished for something more. You like the idea but you wished that it went in this direction or you wanted different  types of interaction, its okay to write your own fic with the same premises. i’ve done that. (side note: but if you are gonna base off of it where a lot of the stuff is the same the give the proper credit where it deserves. no stealing peoples hard work) thats what fanfic was originally made for, fans wanted something more from their favorite works or wants something different (Thank you star trek fandom who started all this). I’ve read a lot of villain deku fics and i was craving a specific type of villain fic where “he really isnt a villain but is one but there is a reason why hes being evil cause it is for the greater good cause of deku’s savior complex and border line martyr complex he’s had since he was a child” with a side of “hero/villain romance”, “surprise quirk” and “badass” and a healthy scoop of “bakugo becomes a better person on his own without deku at UA through the power of friendship cause he has that potential without deku’s constant interference”. no one had what i wanted, so i started writing it myself.
also dont worry about being original. you can write a common idea that everyone sees a thousand times a day, like isekai, and people will love it. focus on how you are telling your story, dont put so much effort in being different. actually, common or typical tropes/ideas help make the story more relatable. two books can be equally as good but one person can like book A over book B because they felt more connected to the characters in it. they could relate to the emotions that were being conveyed. 
now writing tips....hmmmmm well not everything works for everyone but this is what i do
I write notes down, lots of them. I have notebooks full of notes for my fics. some people can just sit there and start writing, but i like notes to keep me on track and remind me of stuff i wanted to add. Writing it down makes it easier not to forget, cause you are just lying to yourself if you think you’ll remember the idea for later. i got dialogue, scenes, plots, random quirk ideas, diagrams, (12) oc profiles, outlines, lists, and a event idea that i have that i want to do some day, all in my notebook. If you are going to write a long fic i strongly encourage that you do this. Outlines are your friend, they are bones of the story Ex:
Hero By Another Name original outline:
meet at a fire, firefighter impresses kiri who will later seek her out
kiri is becoming popular and wants to share the fame
they bond some how(?)
firefighter kiri, kirishima needs to wear a firefighter uniform
firefighter turns out to be a mega fan of red riot
photoshoot
kirishima finds out shes a nerd and is cool with it
firefighter is now popular
camping with baku or bakusquad?
miscommunication
kirishima does a big confession
I always start off with the key things i want for sure to happen. then i start adding to it. I write out the scene i definitely want to see or i can see clearly in my head. i just keep adding to it till its at least three pages long of just outline that has some images, random dialogue i want someone to say or little summaries of the scene i want.
its okay to jump around when you write. there are some parts that you know you need in a story to help it move a long but it can be boring. so i write one scene that i want to happen next and then i think of what needs to happen to get to that point. like how in hero another name where kirishima shows up unannounced to her apartment  and finds out she hoards all his hero merch while not wearing pants.  how do you make that not sound creepy and have kirishima be okay with it? by adding bits of how much of a fan she is through out the story! when they first have dinner together i threw in that red riot shirt to help break the ice and that he would then know that she was a big enough fan to buy his merch and that she admires him and that he is an inspiration for her. then later adding that interview where she talks about how she became his fan shows that she has years of dedication to him as a hero. so when he sees all the merch she has, it would make sense to him that she had all of that and not go “huh, will i be able to leave this place if i enter?”
if you dont know it, look it up. research. i wrote a fic before where the reader was pregnant the entire time, i started at two months to birth. I knew nothing about pregnancy on how it can affect your daily life and what it feels like beyond what health class and child development class taught me. So i looked it up. there is seriously so much that doctors look for during those many ultrasounds cause there are so many things that can affect your health and the baby’s and did you know there is pregnancy diabetes? you can become diabetic only during pregnancy, like after you give birth it can go away or stay, the human body is just tripy. but thanks to that research, people who have had children before left comments going “yessss, i remember feeling that” or “god, this was my sister in this scene, it sucks”. Its that relatability i mentioned before that really helps and it makes the story more believable.
(this is just my personal opinion mainly here feel free to ignore) when it comes to smut, write what you know and not what you fantasize about. im not calling anyone out but i can tell from how someone writes sex that they never had it and they are most likely younger than me. i’ve experimented a lot in my 25 years of life and i find myself going “oh sweetie, thats not how the vagina/anus works” when i read fics sometimes. there are guides online that are very informative and tell you what the feelings are like that you would expect. dont rely on porn too much on how sex works physically, maybe for dialogue. (i think of porn as just live action fanfics for the human mating ritual fandom). its okay to use other smuts as reference tools as well, especially if you dont know anything of the bdsm lifestyle.
beta readers help a lot. if you are unsure of ideas that you have, talk it out with a friend. I sometimes do this for myself or help others with their fics. its actually a lot of fun with a group of people where you just keep shooting off ideas together about stuff and just go all out fangirlling to the point you are rolling on the ground smiling. this can help with writers block or motivate you to keep writing. also having another pair of eyes to look at your fics, not just for corrections but for input on the story can help make it better. someone can see things from a different angle and point stuff out to you, plot holes or things that you can add.
im not sure what else to say other than stuff like format and spacing. sometimes i see people who write too long of paragraphs or there is no clear separation between them. thats killer on the eyes and makes me not want to read at all cause all i see is this wall of text thats just overwhelming. i want to call who ever formatted textbooks cause thats how they do it and it makes it so hard to concentrate on reading and absorbing the info. if i see fics with no clear breaks or long running paragraphs, i usually give up half way cause i just cant do it. its hard to keep track where you are reading and you start trying to focus on it too much that the story is just lost on me. it is hard on people like me who have dyslexia (who ever called it that is just cruel to people who have it cause you can never spell it without spell check and pronouncing it is just ugggh) 
i hope this helps
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dialovers-translations · 5 years ago
Text
Diabolik Lovers VERSUS III Vol. 2 Laito VS Shin [Track 3]
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Original title: 無い物ねだり
Source: Diabolik Lovers Lost Eden VERSUS III Vol. 2 [CD not owned by me]
Audio: Here
Seiyuu: Hirakawa Daisuke & Shoutaro Morikubo
Translator’s note: So far all tracks have been relatively short, which I’m grateful for because it can be quite draining to translate a 20+ minute track in one sitting. I prefer having various shorter tracks because I can take small breaks in between, without having to wait for a good moment to pause. I hadn’t heard any blood-sucking scenes from Shin before and B O Y. Why is he so aggressive??? He kind of sounds like he’s choking at times. I thought maybe this CD would change my opinion on Shin but eeeeeh. I think I understand now why he always ranks last in the popularity polls. 
This track was requested by an anonymous user! If you would like to request a translation, please contact me through IMs or drop an ask!
Track 1 ll Track 2 ll Track 3 ll Track 4 ll Track 5 ll Track 6
Track 3: Asking for the Impossible
Shin: “...Oi! Che...At this rate, we’ll crash against the ground. ...Fuck!”
Shin zooms through the air.
Shin: “Oi...! Reach out your hand! ...Che...She lost consciousness? ...Argh!!”
He uses his magic to pull you his way.
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Shin: “Ugh...That was a close call.” 
Shin lands on the ground.
Shin: “For fuck’s sake...He went and used his magic even though I was holding you. That’s an obvious foul play, isn’t it?”
He lays you down and slaps your cheek.
Shin: “Oi...Open your eyes...Oi, I said! ...Oi!! Wake up already!”
You finally regain consciousness.
Shin: “Oh? You’re awake? Ahー What happened earlier was his fault. That pervert snapped and lost control over his powers, sending both of us flying.”
You slowly sit up.
Shin: “Basically, I was so generous to save you. Get it?”
You nod.
Shin: “Haah...I went out of my way to save you and that’s all I get in return?”
You thank him.
Shin: “Exactly. You have to at least say ‘thank you’ first. Haah...That being said, his powers are a little unexpected. I guess they’re still Karlheinz’ powers no matter what. (1) Right now it’s still manageable since he can’t fully control them, but one day he’ll become a force to be reckoned with. ...Haah. I suppose I’ll have to make my move now. 
...Hey! Admit you also had no other choice but to come hide here.”
You look a little pale.
Shin: “...So, what’s the matter?”
You seem startled.
Shin: “You’re shivering? ...God, don’t give me extra work. Come on, scoot over.”
Shin pulls you close.
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Shin: “Oh well, you fell all the way down from that height, guess it’s to be expected. ...Come on, it’ll be okay. I’m here with you, so calm down. Next time I won’t let him treat you like that. I just let my guard down a little too much earlier. How could I have known he would lose control at that very moment?”
He hugs you tighter.
Shin: “How are you feeling? Calmed down? ...I see. Then now, it’s my turn. This whole time, the scent of Vampire has been so intense, I can’t stand it. He had his way with you, didn’t he? This calls for a severe punishment, hehehe. ...Ugh!”
Shin roughly pulls down your collar.
Shin: “Ah-aah...There’s dirty bite marks all over. He sure has guts. To lay his hands on what belongs to a Founder...That’s an unforgivable sin for a lowly Vampire. Say? Don’t you think so too?”
He bites you.
Shin: “Nn...Ugh!! ...Hmー Tastes horrible. I need to purify you thoroughly. Nn...Haah!!”
You try and slip away but Shin grabs hold of you.
Shin: “Woah there, get a grip! We’ve only just started, you see? Don’t you want to feed me some delicious blood?”
You shake your head, but he bites down again regardless.
Shin: “...Haah? You want me to stop? Seems like you’re not getting it. This is a punishment. In other words, you don’t have the right to refuse. Haahn...”
*Gulp gulp*
Shin: “Haah...!! Ugh...Besides, despite everything, aren’t you kind of enjoying it as well? ー The feeling of my fangs, that is. It’s crystal clear to me. Everything is!”
*Sluuurp*
Shin: “...Run away? Me? Why?”
You explain.
Shin: “Well, he does seem to possess some pretty impressive might. As to be expected of Karlheinz’ powers. However, don’t forget, okay? I’m a descendant of the First Bloods as well. I know that you are frightened of that guy’s powers after getting hitting by them first hand, but don’t underestimate me either.”
Shin grabs hold of your wrist.
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Shin: “I too, have the power to show you hell by lifting just one finger. Want to test your luck?”
You shake him off and start running.
Shin: “...Ah, hold up! There’s no need to that scared!”
You continue running.
Shin: “Hey! Try using that useless brain of yours to think about this question ー Who would you rather be owned by? There’s no way you’d stick with that guy, right? His powers are beyond his own control. Yet he denies this, and doesn’t even try to use them when necessary. You know that he won’t be capable of protecting you, right?”
You slowly come to a halt.
Shin: “Just be a good girl...And become mine, ‘kay? Haahn...”
He bites you once more.
Shin: “Your blood has become more delicious...Nn...”
*Slurp*
Shin: “Nn...”
ーー TO BE CONTINUED ーー
Translation notes
(1) He uses the expression 腐っても or ‘kusattemo’ which literally means ‘even when rotten...’ and is usually followed by something positive. In this case, it refers to even if Laito is still incompetent to fullly use his newly earned powers at the moment, he still inherited them from Karlheinz, so they will be a force to be reckoned with regardless. 
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dabistits · 5 years ago
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im super conflicted abt hawks atm but i was thinking abt his parallels with shigaraki and i was wondering kinda why there's a difference between wanting 'redemption' (i dont think this is the right word but i cant think of a better one 'want better' maybe?) for shigaraki but not for hawks? is it bc he made a permanent decision to kill twice as essentially an agent of the state?
Just to preface, I don’t think I’m objectively right for just wanting Hawks to eat shit immediately in the next chapter. I’m just complaining because a lot of people who “love both Hawks and Twice” and “think Hawks was wrong, but…” are hard to get away from without going in the other direction toward a group of people who have shitty fandom behavior, whose opinions about the Hawks/Twice situation are (unfortunately) much closer to my own. I don’t think there’s necessarily a “correct” way to feel about Hawks, but I feel differently than a lot of people I see around (who, ironically, are the ones insisting that there’s a “correct” way to feel about Hawks), and that’s frustrating. I want to be done with Hawks. I don’t want him to get any more focus in canon, I don’t want to see more posts about how Hawks committing murder is an indication of inner turmoil instead of him choosing a side, I don’t want to keep running into posts that tack on “but Hawks is also sad/a victim” in discussing what’s pretty clearly a tragedy for Jin and the LOV that Hawks was completely and 100% solely responsible for.
But, yeah, sure. I’ll also explain what I think is the difference between Tomura and Hawks:
1. Part of it is emotional and not logical for sure. I love Jin a lot. He embodies the person who has faced incredible adversity, and still comes out on the other side ready to love and open his heart to others, moreover to protect others. I’m not like that at all, but I think it’s very admirable. So in that sense, it hurts on a personal level to lose him over anyone else, and I can’t not associate that with Hawks, since he’s the killer.
2. Jin is a significant death. The nameless minions that Tomura has killed (many of whom were active “Quirk supremacists”) don’t mean anything to me compared to Jin, and?? Through the lens of narrative, I think that makes Tomura more forgivable, because I genuinely have no interest in there being any plot “resolution” with, like, the dead anti-mutant cultists, because I just do not care about them.
3. Tomura, especially early Tomura, has threatened to go places that are unforgivable, like leaving All Might’s students dead and forcibly bringing Bakugou over to their side (whatever terrible procedure that may have entailed). The difference is that the narrative never actually allowed him to cross that line by actually killing the kids, who we do care about as characters, so while the intent in itself is pretty awful, he was never allowed to complete the action that would take him over to the point of no return. Hawks, however, did cross the line by killing someone who we care about and who is narratively established as a “good person,” who even Hawks concedes is a good person.
3. a. I don’t like the MLA ideologically and I don’t like the decision to have the LOV team up with them. But, again, their takeover plan has been stopped in its tracks, which I’m actually fine with to prevent the LOV from crossing the moral event horizon, but that’s, like… completely irrelevant to me thinking Hawks shouldn’t have killed Jin.
3. b. Though there’s still a chance for Tomura to cross the moral event horizon, and I’m not going to convince myself that it won’t happen. If it’s going to happen, I think it’s highly possible that it might happen in this arc, because now Jin is dead and we know how Tomura and the LOV have historically responded to their friends getting hurt. I, and many others, have called Jin the “heart” of the LOV (his name is also literally written with the kanji for “benevolence”), and now without him, there is no remaining heart nor goodwill.
4. Although both Tomura and Hawks are, on one level, fighting on behalf of the ideals that they were “raised into,” their fights happen in very different ways. The MLA arc in particular made clear that the villains are, in part, fighting for their very survival in ways heroes just aren’t. The threat that the LOV were living under was constant—when it wasn’t heroes or other villain groups, it was trying to find money and shelter and essential upkeep. Hawks may not be ��free” from the HPSC or the occasional villain attack, but he’s free from those constant material struggles. He’s not an “underdog.” 
4. a. Tomura is also, in part, fighting to protect his marginalized friends. It’s for sure not on behalf of every marginalized person, but it’s certainly more than we’ve seen any pro hero fight for. The people Tomura is surrounded with are people who have never been protected nor cared for before, because they were not deemed “innocent” enough to deserve that care and protection, and Tomura continued to care for them even when it was troublesome for him to do so, when they disagreed with him, when they threatened him, and when they fucked up very, very badly. 
4. a. i. Eri is an example of a victim who the heroes fought for, but she’s an easy case to want to love and protect: Overhaul was inarguably an abuser who wanted to elevate the yakuza, she was being used in extended torture-experiment sessions, she killed her father on accident, she’s a child, she’s innocent, she’s selfless, she’s well-behaved. It’s basically not even a question whether or not she “deserves” help.
4. b. It’s people who are difficult who get overlooked. Hawks and hero society are completely unprepared to protect and care for people who don’t behave as they’re supposed to. Hawks did not care for the LOV who didn’t personally befriend him. For the one he did, when Jin didn’t cooperate the way Hawks wanted, he went for the kill. It’s either being easy and “manageable,” or die.
4. b. i. Tomura has specifically spared two people who tried to kill him or actually succeeded in killing his ally, people who he explicitly hated or did not care for. So make of that what you will, I guess.
5. From a leftist perspective, it’s just impossible not to account for the fact that Hawks helps maintain a social structure that creates so much suffering. The question isn’t really whether AFO’s teachings to Tomura are better (they’re not, and I want Tomura to break away from them), but it can’t really be ignored that Hawks is enforcing an ideal that’s wildly popular. Why this matters is that Tomura doing the wrong things will be roundly condemned, and he’ll probably be “punished” for them; but heroes are very unlikely to be punished or held accountable for committing murder, especially if it’s “justified.” 
5. a. This is problematic because it allows heroes, and the state, to define what a justified “emergency situation” is, and who can die in those emergencies. The people who are deemed killable “in an emergency” are usually those who are already marginalized; hence heroes can wait until those marginalized people get desperate enough to commit villainous acts, and then they can swoop in to arrest or kill them to widespread public acclaim.
5. b. Heroes (and law enforcement IRL) don’t address the roots of crime that lie in overarching oppressive structures like misogyny and capitalism. They don’t prevent theft by bringing people financial stability; they arrest people who were desperate enough to steal, and use those people to send a message to poor people everywhere. They make these conditions of desperation more permanent by punishing the most vulnerable people when they slip up, while doing absolutely nothing until the slip-up happens.
5. c. Heroes are punching down, and villains are punching up. That may not be the case with AFO, but I believe it with the LOV specifically, and I believe this matters because it’s exemplified between Hawks and Twice. Hawks targets someone who reached out to him, despite being hurt over and over again by types like him, who has dealt with poverty and fantasy mentally illness completely on his own, and kills him in defense of the very society that allowed all those things to happen to Jin. Hawks was given a choice: sympathize and relate to Jin, and acknowledge his well-founded grievances toward a dysfunctional society, or prioritize the safety and security of that dysfunctional society by permanently removing Jin from the equation. The choice he believes in is the choice he made.
5. d. In order for Tomura to make the same choice with the same implications, they’d have to be living in an alternate universe, in the Kingdom of AFO, where Tomura is a respected noble who infiltrates a rebel group who were going to “commit atrocities,” kills the one person who offered him a way out of AFO’s control, and possibly screws the rebels altogether, but everyone is happy that the rebels are gone. Even if you think Tomura is capable of that, it’s irrelevant because canon!BNHA has completely different power dynamics. Because Tomura’s violence will always be unpopular and persecuted, rather than justified and glorified by the state, he physically cannot replicate a choice like Hawks’. Tomura can approximate it, but even if he does, he’ll be hunted down by heroes for doing so. The circumstances and consequences for making such a choice are totally different.
So. That’s why I don’t think Tomura and Hawks can be equated. Suggesting that this is a level playing field is essentially believing that criminals and law enforcement exist on level playing fields, and they absolutely do not at all. Hawks is particularly abhorrent because he’s already followed through with his choice. He holds power by being part of the policing class, and regardless of how he came into it, he behaves exactly the same as everyone else who “freely” joined, and in his position of power he made the choice to eliminate someone who was socially powerless.
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