#and he wasn't and he seemed like he didn't really care

[dyingswanpavlova]

"Your girl" - Part 7 | The Salesman x Reader

Summary: If he's so bad, then why do you crave him so much? You crave him enough to let him be your first.

Warnings: dead dove do not eat, kidnapping, mentions of sexual abuse and other traumatic events in the past, numbness, helplessness, violence, threatening, mentions of blood, mentions of murder and rape, body issues, trauma talk, scars, stockholm syndrome, forced relationship, unhealthy relationship, depression, manipulation, mentions of sexual activities and desires, smut, oral sex, (rough) sex, penetration, unprotected sex, degradation kink, not beta-read, if I've missed any please tell me! mdni 18+!

"Your girl" - The Salesman x Reader Masterlist

You didn't know what real desire feels like, until you felt it.

Until you felt him.

And you wanted him, as much as you hated him.

The moment his lips crashed against yours, it felt like nothing you had ever felt before.

Sure, you had been kissed before. Once.

The loser has to seduce the shy girl.

But that didn't count. Or even if it did, it didn't matter to you. Because nothing that happened before that kiss seemed to matter.

A part of you expected his kiss to be gentle - he had made a promise to you after all - but there was hardly any gentleness in his touch.

The first second after your lips met had been a soft, tentative caress. Gentle and careful, as if to test the waters. You lay stiffly underneath him, unsure what to really do. You almost felt awkward, but that didn't mean you wanted it to stop. Quite the opposite.

The gentleness felt...almost forced on his part. You already knew he wasn't the soft type, but for you, he tried.

Until he didn't. And eventually his mouth took control of yours.

You didn't mind.

His lips moved against yours more urgently, the tip of his tongue caressing your lower lip and trying to part your lips, demanding entry.

When you finally gave in to his silent demand, slowly and carefully, he took full advantage of that and slid his tongue in your mouth, participating in a sinful dance with your own.

You were still stiff, still shy, still...unsure. And he felt it.

He pulled back, just enough to murmur against your lips. "Open your mouth wider for me, princess."

Princess. That was new. At least you weren't Hana anymore. Or at least not in that moment.

You reluctantly obeyed and with a low groan you felt his tongue push deeper against yours, harder, more demanding.

You almost gasped in surprise, but again, you didn't mind.

It felt so...

So...

And you were still stiff. A part of you almost felt like burying yourself under a pile of non-existence for being so complicated.

But again, he didn't seem to get angry or even frustrated. Instead he slowly pulled his hand back and tipped your chin up with his fingertips.

"Stop thinking so much. Just do whatever feels right. I promise you, I'm not going to laugh or hurt you. I promised you something and I meant it." His voice was softer than you had ever heard it before and it made something inside of you break.

You wanted him. You wanted him so terribly and the thought scared you like nothing else.

God, when he was being gentle like this, you wanted him even more. It made you go near insane with desire and heartbreak, because you could never have him. Could never have this version of him.

He was the man who kidnapped you, not your lover.

The man who slapped you, not the man who kissed you.

But, shit, he kissed you. And you wanted nothing more than exactly that. Maybe even for the rest of your life.

You were always a romantic at heart.

Hopeful and yet hopeless.

"Okay." You whispered softly and nervously nibbled on your lower lip. "I...I just..."

"I know." He whispered and gently ran his thumb over your cheek. "But that's what I'm here for. I'll guide you."

The next thing you realized was how he pressed you against his wardrobe. You had no idea how you even made it across the hallway and to his bedroom, but somehow you did.

He grabbed your wrists and pinned them above your head, leaving you helpless and at his mercy. But you didn't care.

In fact it made you want him all the more.

The sounds he made while his tongue delved deeper into your mouth made the dampness between your legs increase tenfold.

His hands slowly slid down your arms and over your shoulders, until he reached your waist and then he stopped. His touch was so gentle, almost careful, like he was touching a delicate bird and was afraid it might fly away.

"Turn around." He whispered against your lips. You hesitated for a second, but eventually obeyed, with a slowness that almost made him growl in frustration.

His fingers found the zipper of your dress, impatiently tugging at it, when-

He exhaled in even more frustration when he felt your hand reach for his wrist, stopping him in his attempt to skillfully and swiftly undress you.

"What?" He bit out.

You opened your mouth and closed it several times. How would you tell him? Should you? Or should you just show him?

You were almost sure he was going to be so repulsed that he'd go and find himself a second girl in no time.

The thought made something inside of you die.

"Can I just...lie on my back?" You whispered.

He frowned, but he was a clever man and he immediately caught on the fact that something wasn't like it was supposed to be. But since he was something akin a gentleman who'd only beat you, not force your clothes off you or rape you, he had never seen you naked before. And suddenly you felt incredibly insecure.

"What is this about?" He asked in a softer tone. "Are you nervous?"

"Yes." You said quietly. "But that's not the reason."

Instead of answering, he tilted his chin down and his lips met the back of your neck. The shiver that punched through your body and the sound that left your lips were both feral.

"I know." He whispered. "But I'll make you forget about it soon."

"You...You don't understand." You finally gasped out. "It's...You won't want me any longer."

That made him pause and he slowly pulled his head back. His frown got deeper and there was something else in his expression now, something like confusion and a hint of anger.

"What are you talking about?"

You fought with yourself, trying to come up with something to say, something to do, something to explain, but no.

Instead you simply released his wrist.

His frown stayed in place, but eventually he began to move again and you felt his fingertips tickle the skin of your back when he moved to pull the zipper down. Another hard shiver ran through your body and you closed your eyes. Your forehead tightly pressed against the wardrobe, you waited. Waited for him to recoil in disgust. To push you away and call out God, it was all for nothing.

But the call never came.

Instead he was silent for a long moment and you felt his gaze burn holes through your body.

"Who did this?"

He sounded calm - no, like he was desperately trying to stay calm, maybe for your sake. You couldn't yet tell if he was repulsed or if maybe he was trying to act like he wasn't.

The faint trace of the scar was subtle, but still evident, even after all these years. A cruel reminder that you would never be free of your past. Of the pain. Sometimes you felt like you were made of pain far more than of flesh and blood.

"My mother." You said very quietly, unable to open your eyes yet.

His fingertips followed the contour of the scar in a touch so soft that you barely even felt it. But you did feel it. It immediately made you shiver and gasp.

That was nothing.

The moment you felt his lips brush over the skin of your back, slowly following the same line, you inhaled sharply. Breathlessly.

There was not enough air to breathe.

Your hands were pressed against the wardrobe tightly and you felt your legs shake.

This was enough to make your mind go hazy and your head dizzy. If this already drove you insane like that, you couldn't tell if you'd even be able to have sex with him. Or if you'd slowly float off into non-existence.

This was better than life.

A soft whimper came over your lips the second his tongue flicked out to taste your skin.

"Oh God." You moaned breathlessly.

Good, you thought with the little mind you had left to think. Good. He isn't repulsed.

"Your mother." He whispered, without ever stopping his ministrations. It made you tense, but you listened in silence. "Your mother. Is she still alive?"

You kept your eyes closed and nodded.

A low hum came over his lips.

"Good."

A slow frown formed on your face, but you didn't dare to speak now. You wouldn't have done anything if it risked to stop him from what he was doing.

"And that man? Your neighbor? Is he still alive?"

You slowly shook your head.

"Too bad." He whispered against your skin. "I would have loved to take care of him.”

That made your head perk up and you looked over your shoulder, looking at him with something that was equally horrified as it was…admiring.

“What are you talking about?” You whispered softly.

He nodded. “What do you think? You’re my girl. I take care of my girl. And no one gets to hurt you. No one besides me.”

His words sent a warm shiver down your spine. You knew it wasn’t exactly healthy or…good. But it felt good. And you couldn’t help but feel that certain warmth in your body increase.

The way he spoke of you, with such possessiveness, it awakened something in you of which you never before knew you had that in you.

“But they hurt me in the past.” You whispered, as though this was a normal conversation.

“Doesn’t matter”, he whispered back, “they still hurt you. And anyone who did, will pay.”

You wanted to respond, wanted to express anything, but you didn’t have the time. He spun you around so swiftly and effortlessly that you immediately forgot what you had even been talking about. You stumbled backwards until your legs hit the bed and then he slowly pushed you back. Gently, like everything he did that night.

Gently.

Your heart skipped several beats as you stared up at him like that. Your hair was messy and your face flushed, your lips still swollen from the greedy, demanding kiss and your dress hung loosely around your shoulders. But your eyes, your eyes, they held a special kind of expression that night.

Hunger.

It was hunger.

A hunger you hadn’t ever felt before. So powerful, it was all-consuming. Your mind was occupied with him, unable to focus on anything else than his delicious smirk. The one you had grown to…

Oh God, don’t even think that.

“You look so beautiful.” He whispered in a husky voice. His hands wandered up to slowly undo his tie. The sight was enough to stir even more desire in you, forcing you to shift on the bed, your impatience growing. Your heart was aching with how handsome he was.

If only you could have him like that every night.

He slowly pulled the tie off and it fell to the ground, before he slowly moved to undo the buttons of his shirt. That was when you realized that you would either sleep with him that night or die.

Because that was how it felt.

Like you would die without him. Crumble and suffocate.

Your eyes followed the movement of his hands as he slowly shrugged his shirt off, revealing his chiseled, marble chest. The sight made your brows furrow and you did something oh-so cheeky. You bit your lip. You had to, otherwise you would have probably moaned.

“What is it, sweet girl?” He purred as he slowly moved onto the bed, hovering right above you. “Do you like what you see?”

You closed your eyes when his hot breath kissed your ear. Then you nodded and bit your lip again.

“Good.” He breathed. “Then show me something I’ll like as well.”

He hooked his fingertips under the material of your dress and attempted to pull it down, when…

He hesitated. For a moment you were almost sure you had done something terribly wrong again and you were about to get punished. You held your breath and expected him to swing his fist at you.

“Can I?”

Your eyes widened almost comically in surprise. Your mouth fell open and you nodded.

The sight of you so surprised and speechless made him laugh.

God, what a beautiful sound.

If only you could hear it every day.

If only, if only, if only.

Your heart ached again. But you quickly pushed these thoughts aside. Now wasn’t the time. You could mourn your non-existent, fantasy relationship by the time the next morning came.

That moment was for you and him.

And right then, he was there. And he was real.

And he was gentle.

He pulled the dress down torturously slow, his gaze eagerly following every inch of skin that was revealed.

You felt so naked, so exposed, so…so warm under his gaze.

You swallowed thickly and kept your focus on his eyes the whole time. It was like he suddenly was a different person.

A husband type of guy.

You closed your eyes, forcefully trying to suppress these kind of dangerous thoughts. But it was impossible. You were immediately certain.

You were in love with him.

And it didn’t matter how many water bowls he’d make you lick on the floor, how many degrading names he called you and how many marks he gave you.

You were in love with him.

Your eyes shot open and you looked at him with something akin to pain, but your confusion grew when, for probably the first time, he didn’t immediately met your gaze. His gaze was fixed on your body, firm and yet soft, like glue. He didn’t move it away, just kept it roaming up and down your body. It was enough to make you shiver.

“God.” He whispered huskily. “God, you’re perfect.”

He slowly looked up to meet your eyes again and when he did, the tiniest frown grew on his face.

“What is it? You look like you’ve seen a ghost. Am I going too fast?”

You just stared at him, unable to say anything. The way his eyes were soft, the way his voice was, the way he seemed so concerned.

And there we go again.

You felt tears well up in your eyes and you tried desperately to swallow the lump in your throat.

His expression immediately darkened, mixed with surprise and something else. He immediately sat up, moving his hips away from yours.

“You’re not ready.” He said stiffly. “You don’t want to. Fuck, I should have known.”

He attempted to get up and, judging by his reaction, probably flee, but he stopped when he felt your hand on his wrist, holding him back.

“No”, you gasped out quickly. “No, don’t leave. Please.”

He stared at you, his expression troubled. “But you…”

“I want it.” You whispered. “I really do.”

He shook his head. “No.” He said firmly. “Listen, I won’t punish you when you say no now. I don’t want it to be like this. The thought of doing this, when you don’t really want me, it…”

“I do!” You propped yourself up onto your elbows and nodded quickly. “I do.” You whispered. “That’s not why I’m crying. I was just…”

You briefly closed your eyes, before you continued.

“I’m just complicated.”

He didn’t seem all too convinced, but the frown on his face signaled that he wouldn’t try to run off again.

“Yes.” You whispered softly. “I was just overwhelmed. But I want it. Please, don’t…Don’t go now.”

His frown deepened, but he slowly leaned back down.

“You don’t have to do this.” He said quietly. “You don’t have to endure this, to please me. Not this.”

You slowly shook your head. You couldn’t tell him the real reason.

That you were grieving the relationship you could have had with him, in another time, another universe. That you felt like you were falling in love with him…or that you already were.

You opened your mouth to come up with another excuse, but when words failed you yet again, you did something else. You tilted your head up and your lips met his. Soft and tentative, careful and gentle, but it was you who kissed him.

Bold girl.

He hesitated for a moment as if to make sure you really meant it.

It truly surprised you how much he seemed to care about your consent. So far, a small part of you had always believed he’d snap once he got impatient enough and he’d just take what he wanted, not caring if you cried or begged or pleaded.

But that couldn’t have been further from the truth.

And still you couldn’t help but ask yourself if this was solely about the promise that he made you. Because somehow, under all his insanity, there was something like an honorable man. A man who kept his promises.

But you tried your hardest to lock these thoughts out.

To lock any thoughts out.

Tonight was about you and him.

The moment you felt his tongue part your lips again, that was exactly what you thought about.

You and him.

Him.

And suddenly the whole world seemed to fade into nothingness, because all that mattered was the way his tongue felt against yours and the sound that left his lips when you wrapped your arms around him. Your hands slowly wandered up the skin of his back, up to his shoulders. You tried to touch every inch of him and memorize it in your mind, just in case you never got to feel him like that again.

You were pretty sure you were doing something wrong, because you had no idea what you were doing, but you tried to listen to his words and just do what felt right.

He finally pulled your dress off of you, leaving you almost bare, in nothing but a pair of panties. The cold air hit your skin and you felt another shiver run down your spine.

And another one when his hand ran up your stomach.

And another, even harder, one when he gently cupped your breast in his hand.

You were a shivering, stuttering mess underneath him and all you could focus on was the way his hands felt against your skin – warm and gentle, soft and yet demanding.

He moaned against your lips as he gently squeezed your breast in his hand, before he slowly moved it further up to your shoulder, then down your arm. And eventually, oh God, eventually he took your hand in his. He intertwined your fingers and pressed your hand down against the mattress with a gentleness that equaled a breath of air.

He ground his hips down against yours, a movement that made a flash of electricity shoot through your veins. He was so hard. Hard and ready to ruin you.

And God, you wanted him to.

“Are you nervous?” He breathed without even stopping to kiss you. You tried to pull your head back to speak, but he didn’t let you and that was enough to make you moan as well.

“Yes.” You whispered.

“Just relax.” He murmured softly. “Let me take care of you, my sweet, darling girl.”

He slowly withdrew from the kiss, which immediately left you craving more, but you had no time to think about it, because the next moment you felt him press gentle kisses all over your neck. Your head lolled to the side and you exhaled a soft sigh. You didn’t even stop shivering any more.

You wanted to pull him closer, you wanted to beg Please don’t stop, but your lips didn’t obey. Your nervousness was far more powerful than you initially thought.

As if on cue, he pulled his head back, looked down at you and whispered: “If I do something you don’t want, tell me, alright?”

You managed a weak nod, silently begging him to continue.

He put on a cocky smirk and went back to kissing your neck, ever so slowly making his way further down. Just when you thought he couldn’t do anything to make you feel better than that, you felt his lips brush along your bare breast and his tongue darted out and left a slow, lazy path over your hard nipple.

You had no idea you could make such sinful sounds.

“P-please.” You whimpered.

He grinned victoriously. “Please what, sweet girl? Please stop?”

“No!”

He laughed and shook his head. “Don’t worry, sweetness. Just lean back and let me do the rest. I’ll make you feel good, I promise.”

He resumed his actions and you fell back against the pillow, your eyes shut. Only then you realized how tightly you had your arms wrapped around him. One of your hands slowly wandered up and down his back again, while the other one tangled in his soft hair. You let out a soft sigh when he moved over to your other breast, doing the most wicked things with his mouth.

You were so breathless and constantly gasping for air, it left your mouth dry.

And then it got even harder to breathe.

He slowly kissed his path down your stomach, making you shiver and writhe in anticipation and agony.

“Oh God, what are you doing?” You whispered breathlessly. You wanted to call out his godforsaken name, but he didn’t have one. So instead you ran your hand through his hair again.

He hummed against your skin as he teasingly licked a slow path down your stomach.

“You’ll see, princess.” He whispered softly.

By the time he reached the edge of your panties, you were no more than a puddle. A helpless mess, desperate over everything he did.

Over him.

He took the material of your panties between his teeth and slowly tugged them down.

“Oh, God!”

You had a feeling like something inside of you was throbbing.

You had been wet before. Felt that nervous twitch, whenever the bad, wicked thoughts entered your mind.

But nothing ever came close to this.

When he slowly freed you of your underwear, you were sure you were about to faint, until-

Fucking hell.

He used his teeth the entire way and when he finally managed to pull them off, he bit down on them and you were sure you saw his tongue dart out. You lay there like a statue, your eyes wide and your cheeks flushed as you witnessed how he tasted the piece of lace that had just covered your soaking wet, most private part.

All you could do was stare, your mouth wide open, as you felt the dampness slowly turn into a pool of arousal.

He slowly pulled them out of his mouth and tossed them aside, his eyes fixed on your own eyes.

He hummed out a soft: “I knew you were delicious.”

You opened and closed your mouth several times, but all that came out was nothing.

He smirked again, but it wasn’t even close to mocking. It was more something like…

Satisfaction.

“Are you ready for me, princess?”

Another weak nod later, you felt him lean closer. The second his hot breath hit your core, you let out a needy, breathless whimper.

You had no idea what that felt like, but judging from the way simply his breath on you felt…

“Keep looking at me.” He whispered. “I want to see your eyes, when I taste you.”

And then you finally felt it. His mouth enveloped you in a way you had only ever seen in videos and you reaction came the same instant.

You tried to keep your eyes open, but they fell shut as if on cue.

And the moment you felt his tongue against you, you were done for.

He began to slowly move it, circle your clit and gently suck on the sensitive skin.

Any semblance of composure left your body and you moaned. And moaned. And moaned.

“Oh…Oh God.” You breathed out, instinctively tightening your hand in his hair.

He let out a soft moan when you did and the sound made you moan in response. The soft vibrations of his humming against your skin nearly made your eyes roll back. You wanted to look at him. But God, it was hard to even breathe.

You didn’t know how he did it. But he did things to you, things that made you feel a tightness in you, like it was all too much and also not even close to enough.

He kept running his tongue over your wet folds, again and again, going from gentle and slow to hard and quick. But the way he sucked on your skin was what made you tremble and ache from the inside.

You were close, you could tell. And you didn’t even need to imagine the most heinous things for it.

“Oh God, please, please, oh God, please!”

He didn’t make any attempts to tease you or stop. He grasped your thighs tightly and propped your legs over his shoulders, pulling you even closer. He hummed again and moved and moved and moved and-

“Oh God!”

You inhaled sharply, tensing up so painfully hard. And then you became still. The pleasure rolled over you in hot waves, as a warm, white light overshadowed everything else in your mind.

You never before came so hard in your entire life.

When you finally, slowly came back down from your high, you carefully lifted your head from the pillow, only to find him already staring up at you. He ever so slowly pulled his head back and looked up at you in awe.

And you stared down at him in fascination.

The devil took over your body, because you suddenly felt unable to wait any longer. You needed to feel him. You impatiently reached for him and pulled him back up, until you felt him pressed against you again.

His hardness achingly straining against his pants, pressed against your warm wetness.

“That was so…God, that was so…”

His lips curved up into a slow smile, but he seemed just as breathless.

Did he get even harder?

You let out a shuddery breath and crashed your lips against his again. He felt so warm on top of you, so safe, that you momentarily forgot that you were so scared of him at times.

You forgot that he kidnapped you and you forgot that he slowly broke your soul.

He also made you Hotteok and he made you cum, didn’t he?

Effortlessly.

You needed him. And you were going to die if you didn’t feel him soon.

“Are you still sure?” He breathed and leaned down to nip at your earlobe.

You nodded breathlessly and bit back another moan.

“I am.” You whispered softly.

And the next moment, you felt his hand slowly reach down. Heard his belt unbuckle and fall to the ground. The sound made something inside of you ache with even more impatience.

You used the small moment to look up at his face. His hair was a mess and his eyes were focused on your body, while he reached down and slowly pushed his pants down. When he felt you staring at him, he met your gaze and raised his brows.

“What?” He murmured.

You suddenly realized you had never seen him so…vulnerable before.

He was still confident, still in control. But something about the way he looked and spoke had softened to an extreme degree. It was like sex was something important to him.

Maybe he wouldn’t just fuck you once and then instantly get rid of your body.

Maybe he would actually keep you around.

And you couldn’t tell if that was good or bad.

You stared at him for a long moment, then you shook your head.

“Nothing.” You whispered. “I’m just…”

“Nervous?”

You nodded.

He hummed softly. Before you could look down to catch a glimpse of him in his bare form, he gently tipped up your chin and narrowed his eyes thoughtfully.

“We can still stop.”

“I don’t want to stop.” Your voice sounded more confident now. More like someone you didn’t know, but slowly grew to like.

He looked at you for a long moment, before he eventually released your chin. You slowly tilted your face down, your gaze following the sharp contour of his hard body.

He didn’t seem bothered at all by your staring. If anything, he seemed curious. Like he hadn’t been admired like that in long.

Your gaze stopped on his hardened length, thick and long enough to ravage you and throbbing. He was obviously more than eager, but he held himself back without flinching. You were almost disbelieving of such calmness.

You licked your lips as your gaze slowly glided back up to meet his eyes. The look in them hadn’t changed. Determined and ready. But still soft.

You knew at some point he would snap back into that other persona, into the cruel and scary man that he so often was.

But all you saw now was this softness.

And that was all you cared about.

It looked like he was about to ask again, to make sure again, but the look in your eyes stopped him.

You were nervous. And trembling. And even a tad bit scared.

But you were no less determined than he was.

He slowly pressed himself closer, slowly rubbing himself against you. A soft whimper came over your lips and he seemed to have to hold himself back from making any sounds.

He reached up his free hand and gently cupped your cheek. And then he slowly pressed forward.

Carefully. Gently. Inch by inch.

His eyes stayed focused on yours the entire time, checking your reaction.

The moment you felt him press against you, press inside you, you exhaled a small breath.

It was…

Painful. Mostly painful.

You bit your lip to suppress the hiss of pain which still found its way past your mouth. He hesitated to move forward, but eventually continued.

“Does it hurt a lot?” He whispered.

It was more of a pressure, feeling as tight as a coiled spring, ready to snap.

“Yes.” You whispered. “But I don’t want you to stop.”

He clenched his jaw and slowly pushed forward. It was like he was two people at once. One wanted to be careful and gentle and not hurt you, while the other one seemed all too eager to thrust forward and ravage you like a beast in heat.

But he held himself back.

You were sure it was just for tonight.

But he did it. For you.

And you needed him even more, because of that.

A sharp pain shot through your body and you released a soft sound, a mixture of a moan and a sob. But a few seconds later the pain finally dissolved. And then you felt something else.

“God, you’re so tight.”

He slowly began to move again, going slow and careful at first. You felt more and more of him, until you finally felt all of him.

Your nails dug into the skin of his back and you inhaled sharply when he thrust into you harder than before.

Something was off, you could tell. He clenched his jaw tightly and stared down at you with furrowed brows.

And suddenly it hit you.

He was holding himself back for your sake, you knew that.

But you had no idea how hard it was for him to hold himself back.

He had promised you a sweet, gentle, loving first time and that was what he wanted to give you. But what you saw behind his eyes was something akin to pain. He wanted to go harder. He was desperate to.

He was obviously desperate to do many things.

“You can go harder.” You whispered, almost reassuringly.

He shook his head.

“It’s alright.” You whispered again. “The pain passed.”

“That’s not the problem.” He whispered as he rolled his hips against you deliciously, forcing a moan over your lips.

“Then what is?” You breathed out.

“If I go harder now, then I can’t stop. I won’t.” He whispered and gently cupped your cheek in his hand again.

Almost involuntarily, you closed your eyes and leaned into his touch, before you met his gaze again. Now you were filled with even more determination.

“Yes, you can.” You whispered, sounding almost firm. “Go harder. Just a little.”

He seemed unsure, but eventually he did. He moved harder against you, more urgently, but not quite rough yet. Still, his eyes fell shut and a moan fell from his lips.

A particular hard thrust as well as his reaction caused you to moan in return and close your eyes as well.

His head fell forward and he buried his face in his your neck. His harsh breaths made you shiver and sigh.

“I made a promise to you. And I’ll keep it.”

That made you gently tangle your hand in his hair again and pull back, just enough to look at him.

There was something in your eyes that made him pause.

“What?” He murmured breathlessly.

You looked up at him with wide eyes and whispered: “I want you to fuck me.”

His brows furrowed. “I am-“

“No.” You breathed out. “I want you to fuck me the way you want.”

He stared down at you for a long moment.

“But I might hurt you.”

You bit your lip and shook your head, gently cupping his face in your palms.

“I said, fuck me.”

And immediately something in his expression changed. A part of the lunatic who had murdered a man came back. It was scary, really.

But you weren’t scared.

You were fascinated.

And oh, you were aroused.

He started moving harder against you, thrusting deeper into you and then he released a low growl.

“Are you giving me orders”, he breathed, “or are you begging me?”

You gasped for air when he thrust into you even harder. The ache between your legs got worse, the need deeper. And his pace more and more punishing.

“Begging.” You gasped out. “I’m begging you.”

“Then beg me.” He hissed. As if to emphasize his point, he began to move even faster against you.

“Please.” You moaned out.

“Please what?”

“Please fuck me.” You whispered breathlessly. You felt your face flush so hard, it was almost painful, but for the first time in your life you didn’t care. You said the word, because you wanted to say it. And you let him fuck you, because you damn well wanted to.

And suddenly the spell was broken.

“Fuck. Oh God. Please. Fuck me.”

The harder he moved, the more intense that feeling inside of you became.

You never came before from the feeling inside of you, only ever by stimulating your clit.

This was new, it was intense, it was insane, it was-

“Who are you?” He hissed out in a voice that was near furious.

“Your girl.” You gasped out without hesitation. “I’m your girl.”

“Good girl.” He leaned his head down and gave you a long kiss, his tongue pressing into your mouth aggressively while he began to pound even harder into you.

Before you could protest (as if you would have) he pinned your wrists down against the mattress. You were completely at his mercy, you belonged to him and you were in love with him.

You were fucked.

“Who are you?” He bit down on your lip hard enough to draw blood.

You let out a pained moan and pressed your hips up against his.

He moaned into your mouth. “Good girl.”

Then he grabbed your thigh and yanked your leg over his waist, pressing himself even deeper into you. His movements were bordering on aggressive and your moans became louder and more and more breathless. Just like his own.

That was what had been missing back when he pressed into you so gently and carefully.

And you realized you never wanted to miss it again.

“Who are you?” He breathed out again.

“Your girl.” You gasped out.

He hummed and leaned down to bite down on your neck, only to soothe the bite with his tongue a moment later. “That’s right. My cumslut. My good girl. My whore. My princess.”

Each and every word that left his lips made you feel more and more wicked, more desperate to feel him deeper and harder, which you did.

He moved against you with a fervor that bordered on painful and you loved every second of it.

It was painful. But you suddenly realized what you never knew before.

There was a good kind of pain. It existed.

“Are you close, princess?” He breathed before he bit down on your earlobe, causing you to release a soft whine.

You tried to speak, but all that came out was moan, after moan, after moan. So you simply nodded.

He growled in response and pressed your wrists down even harder.

“I’m going to make a mess of you, princess.” He hissed. With a few quick, rough thrusts more, you felt your eyes roll back and your back arch off of the bed and against him.

If what you felt earlier had been an orgasm, you needed a new word for this.

The feeling was so hard and intense, it was almost unpleasant by how fucking good it was.

You wanted to cry and scream out his name, but all you could do instead was dig your nails into his skin, hard enough to scratch down to his blood.

He growled again and started moving so furiously that you felt like you were being torn apart, until you finally felt him twitch and throb inside you. The sounds he made were good enough to almost make you cum again and you watched with half-lidded eyes as he rode out his release, giving a few deep thrusts into you and releasing deep inside you.

Your body was still twitching and writhing underneath him. He kept his eyes closed and rested his forehead against yours. When he tried to pull back, you wrapped your legs around his waist.

“Wait.” You whispered breathlessly. “Not yet. Just…Can we just stay like that? Just for a moment?”

He slowly opened his eyes and met your gaze and to your great surprise…They were still soft. Even more so than before.

“Of course.” He whispered and buried his face in your neck. He slowly lowered himself back down on you, just enough so he wouldn’t crush you.

You were both breathing heavily and your hands were warm and damp with sweat.

“Was that alright for a first time?” He suddenly whispered.

And you did something that you hadn’t done in a while and you had been sure you wouldn’t ever again.

You smiled.

“Yes.” You whispered. “It was perfect.”

He pulled his head back and raised a brow. “Not too rough?”

You shook your head.

He hummed as he observed your smile for a moment.

“I held myself back.” He murmured. “I can’t be gentle next time.”

You looked at him with a soft expression and nodded.

“I know. I remember your words.”

He reached out a hand and gently touched your cheek.

“You should know one thing, darling.” He suddenly whispered.

Your eyes widened and you listened intently. Still, a part of you expected a low, painful blow.

But you couldn’t tell if it ever came.

His words left you torn.

“I’ll never let you go."

___________________________________________

Tag list: @mitsuki-dreamfree @kpopsmutty69 @heroine-chique @vkeyy @mizuwki @blu-brrys @z0mbi345 @yourpointbreak @ayieayee @freddyzeppsworld @lola11111111 @indifitel6661 @salesmanlover08 @laurenbenoit70 @lalalaa2210 @lila-marshal @auspicious-lilana @0-aubrie0 @lovelyaegyo @theredvelvetbitch @violentbluess @muriels-lover @dorayakissu @eviebuggg @muchwita @ririgy @strxlemon @obsessedwthdilfs @kiwilov3 @misty-q @whitefeathers @ennvfv @heartzxx @yourpointbreak @hell0kittt @salesmanlover08 @pascalislove @nina357 @ing9449myu @vamplivivi @tvbais @ilovenana00 @misswannadiesworld @glads-stuff @chunkzdeluluwife @estreiiuh @lokis-lovely-muse @zaimeskuna @lalalaa2210 @i-might-be-vanny @cupidzslvt @k1rapark3r @vyladsgirl @jayyourbabe @yeaiamme2 @babyscilence @abcde-12345dorito @madzpm @o9sessions @dilfismz @idenack @sunburngal @prettysatoru @newtscreatures347269 @4j4ax @yru3xme @rafecamsgirlll @recordofragnarokfan2

If I forgot anyone, please let me know and I'll fix it!

[malereadermaniac]

Virgins ~ Haikyuu & BNHA men x Male Reader

How Daichi, Kuroo, and Lev are during their first time with you - as well as: Bakugo, Kirishima, Denki Top!Characters x Bottom!Reader Characters are aged up!! Word count: 2.3k Nsfw / MDNI ~ amab m!reader / FDNI

Virgin!Daichi who never wanted to impose on you or seem like a perv, so you had to make the first move. The Karasuno captain would get overwhelmed with just kissing, so when you suggested that you take things further, the man almost short circuited. Sure, he could handle making out with you, with your legs around his waist or his knee just below your crotch, but that didn't mean that his mind wasn't RACING whilst your tongue was toying with his. So when your (overly-)kind boyfriend heard you offer him a blowjob, he couldn't even look you in the eyes or he knew he would fold, subsequently bombarding you with "you don't have to" 's.

Virgin!Daichi who couldn't control the plethora of moans and whines and chants of your name as you skillfully went to town on his dick. You didn't mean to overwhelm your cute boyfriend, but you did want to make him never forget his first bj; so you may have pulled out all of your best moves. You were complimenting him non-stop, on his looks, his voice, and most of all his thick, veiny, uncut dick which you "loved shoo much". Anytime Daichi would tug on your hair just a little tighter, you quickly yet effortlessly pulled off of his dick and just looked up into your boyfriend's eyes, while his pretty impressive dick rested on your face; covered in your spit and showing off just how big it was compared to your face. And in the same way that Daichi could barely take his eyes off of you, you couldn't take your eyes off of Daichi. He just looked so fucking hot; fighting the urge to shut his eyes and drown in the pleasure just so that he could keep looking at you, Daichi's mouth would fall agape more and more the longer you worked his cock and his tongue show it's pretty pink surface once in a while, oh and the way Daichi's muscles would flex! His pecks and abs would tense as his muscular arms showed off his veins, all because of your magical mouth; Daichi's fingers gripping your hair tighter and his blissful look turning into one of raw pleasure as he came down your throat, his eyes shutting tight and then opening once more, only to be rolled to the back of his head as his hips give tiny jolts of pleasure.

Virgin!Daichi who had never felt the way he felt then. Not even just sexually! Although it was true that he'd never felt such pleasure before, he'd never been so fucking hard, and so fucking horny, and SO FUCKING ATTRACTED TO YOU. But also, in that moment he felt so much love! He just really fucking loves you. You took such great care with him and were so patient, Daichi felt guilty that he couldn't verbalise his love and thankfulness in the moment; but that was mainly your fault after all...

Virgin!Kuroo who gets visibly excited when you suggest having sex. Although the volleyball player seems to have tons of charisma and charm, he's always been too busy with college and volleyball to focus on relationships. That was until you came along, and along with you came Kuroo's buried sexual desires; and they took over. The handsome man didn't wanna scare you off though, so he stuck to thinking about you as he jerked off and being the perfect, non-creepy boyfriend instead. But holy shit did things change when you asked him if he wanted to fuck. The smile on his face didn't fade until a new, even happier expression took over, and then a smug expression...

Virgin!Kuroo who can't contain his excitement, running his smooth hands over every inch of your exposed body; of course, finishing his exploration and setting up camp on your plump ass, squeezing your cheeks and kneading them like dough. Kissing Kuroo in this moment was different, the love was still there like always but he felt more dominant; his tongue guiding yours instead of you guiding him like before. As the two of you made out, Kuroo manuvered your body to be below his, and quickly the man broke the kiss and trailed his way down your body with little pecks and bites; SINCE WHEN DID YOUR VIRGIN BOYFRIEND HAVE SO MUCH SKILL??!!?!

Virgin!Kuroo who gets too impatient and shoves himself inside of you a little too quickly after promising to go slow... You expected it though, you could see it on his face; when Kuroo slowly slid his tip inside, his eyes widened and his smile dropped into a pleasured sigh. The room was filled with Kuroo's horny, sexy moans. His groans echoing inside the bedroom along with the soft sound of his thighs smacking against yours at a slow pace. Kuroo was above you, brokenly moaning your name and whining at your tightness, his face flushed pink and his eyes hazy with love and lust; your boyfriend was cock-drunk off of you, unable to think straight because of how good he felt being inside of you, being near you, kissing you.

Virgin!Kuroo who has never been the same since fucking you. This man is the horniest piece of shit known to man, you two fuck like every other hour!! He's such a bad influence on you, 'cause he knows you can never say no to him; which has indeed led to you two fucking in storage closets, changing rooms, clubrooms, classrooms, bathrooms, and even his parents bedroom!!! You can't complain though, the sex is fucking killer everytime. And even in a non-sexual sense, your relationship has never been better! Kuroo is fucking in-love with you, and you're just as head-over-heels for him!

Virgin!Lev who has never been in a relationship due to looking kinda intimidating to most people, but you saw him for the sweet dork he really was! Your relationship with the taller man was always quite wholesome; dates like any other couple and hanging out. Being a virgin actually made Lev a little insecure about his relationship with you - what if he wasn't any good in bed and you broke up with him! So it was understandable that it took until the 6 month mark for you two to actually sleep together, and of course it was you who proposed the idea. Even though Lev was very nervous, he couldn't deny the fact that he did really wanna have sex with you, his body showing that fact by popping a boner the SECOND you mentioned fucking.

Virgin!Lev who was high on pleasure very quickly, all worries and nerves evaporating from his body once he was inside of you. Your warm smile and patience really helped to ease Lev into it (in more ways than one lol). Oh and when your boyfriend started to thrust? It was over for him. This man was drunk on pleasure, your warmth, your tightness, it was all too much for him. Lev went from trying to give you backshots in doggy like he'd seen in porn, to resting his chest on your back and hugging your waist as he pathetically humps you! You didn't mind though, hearing your boyfriend's rugged breaths and moans in your ear was hot, as well as feeling his strong, long arms around your waist, his fit chest against your back; both you and Lev also couldn't deny that the size difference between you both was a HUUUUGE turn on! Oh and not to mention the sexy "chert voz'mi da..." and "tak khorosho, khorosho, khorosho...." that Lev would mumble to himself as he began to loose his pace and fuck into you like a desperate animal. Hearing your boyfriend swear in Russian was something you didn't know you needed so damn bad.

translation: chert voz'mi da ~ Fuck yes tak khorosho, khorosho, khorosho ~ so good, good, good

Virgin!Bakugo who's too smug and too prideful to ever let onto the fact that he is a MEGA virgin!! Like never even held hands romantically! The only person he'd even really had those feelings for was you, so it made sense that the temperamental man hadn't had much sexual experience; however that doesn't mean that Katsuki doesn't understand the social stigma around that, and his ego would never allow his reputation to take such a hit. So to say you were shocked when your boyfriend finally let his stupidly high walls down and confessed to you that all his big talk was bullshit, well that would be an understatement.

Virgin!Bakugo who doesn't let the fact that he's never even kissed someone get in the way of finally getting it on with you; effortlessly pulling out tricks that would make you think he was kind of a playboy! Katsuki knew to loosen you, knew about your prostate and exactly how to stroke it in a way that made you spiral, and the man was even talking that talk AND walking that walk; his actions and words were on point! You were pleasently surprised by how easy your boyfriend had made your job, you'd prepared yourself to talk the blonde through everything! What you didn't know however, was that Katsuki had been studying up on gay sex since your one week anniversary... Bless his heart.

Virgin!Bakugo who kind of rocks your world! His pace rough but not fast; it felt good, he was hitting all the right spots with that big dick of his, and his attitude was (for lack of better words) just straight-up hot. However, that's not to say that Katsuki wasn't almost immediately overwhelmed by pleasure, and his brain was slowly but surely starting to turn to mush just from the warmth and tightness of your ass. The blonde was stuttering on most words, moans ripping from Bakugo's throat and interrupting whatever he was saying; but it just made it all the more enjoyable - your boyfriend feeling so damn good 'cause of you, it was a huge turn on for you. And ever since the first time, Katsuki has moved his strict nighttime routine back a bit, making time to have some fun with you every night.

Virgin!Kirishima who's quite unaffected by being a virgin. He's been in relationships but has never taken that step, but he didn't really care; sure he'd like it, but the red-head had never felt a need for it - that was until he started dating you. Holy shit did you turn Kiri on so, so much; it was like you couldn't even speak without making the man want to fuck you out of your mind! So even though he never told you, Kirishima was desperately waiting for the right moment to finally be inside of you, to get as intimate as possible with you. The grin on his face when you asked him to go further was something you'd never forget, mainly cause it just turned you on even more; your dick already hard from making out with your boyfriend, now painfully harder!

Virgin!Kirishima who is a moaning and grunting mess, thrusting into you like no tomorrow, desperate to feel you faster, deeper. Your boyfriend slurred his words as he would chant your name like an ancient prayer, moaning softly into your ear and his body jerking slightly at any clench of your hole onto his dick. It didn't take long for Kirishima to lose himself, mumbling incoherent variations of calling you beautiful and tight, his face flushed a bright pink and his entire body drenched in sweat; you got your boyfriend cock-drunk on your hole within literal minuets. It did surprise you how long Kiri lasted though! For a virgin who was absolutely drilling his dick into you at a life-threatening pace and force, the red-head didn't seem close to cumming; his uneven pace not faltering. But trust, when that man did reach his climax, the most raw, blissful moan erupted from Eijiro's throat; his body collapsing on top of yours, his sweaty muscles smushed against yours and his sweaty face buried into your neck as the man gently bit you, holding himself back from marking you more than he already had. Other than feeling your boyfriend's huge, rock hard body crush you, you felt incredible too; the feeling, and sight, and sound of your boyfriend reaching his peak inside of you and basking in the sweet, strong afterglow, holy fuck did it turn you on. So much so that the soft whimpers and voice-crack-riddled moan Eijiro was letting out resulted in you shooting your load too, painting your stomach and your boyfriend's shiny, sweaty abs.

Virgin!Denki who starts physically shaking with excitement when you ask him to fuck. Your rattlebrained boyfriend short-circuiting just from the idea of finally getting laid; best of all, his first time being with you! You kinda knew straight away that Kaminari was a mega-virgin, the man having his perverted side and all, and getting flustered at the smallest amounts of attention from you; but if anything, it was a turn on for you.

Virgin!Denki who gets cock-drunk out of his mind! Within only a couple of minutes of thrusting his dick in and out of your warm, tight entrance, the blonde was a moaning mess above of you. Denki was slurring his words, weakly moaning out nonsensical words, and chanting your name all whist holding tightly onto you; the amount of pleasure he was feeling for the first time in his life was a little overwhelming.

Virgin!Denki who just looks so fucking hot as he's cumming inside of you! His body sheening with sweat, his muscles bulging and his face contorting in pleasure; Denki's entire tan body dusted ever so slightly with a pink hue. And even though you'd expect your unexperienced boyfriend to shut down after orgasming, he made sure even in his post-euphoric state, that you came too; even using his quirk just a tad to shock the pleasure out of you.

[kingedbishop]

The android seemed to always be on his best behavior around Vincent, even when he wouldn't have minded bothering Dan. Sure, the other's systems always seemed on the verge of overloading and he didn't enjoy some casual brawling. But he was harmless, thus he could afford to lower his guard.

The only real threat in the house was Bishop anyway, the other humans simply looked odd. They could be ignored and he could spend some time knitting.

"Mh." He looked down as Vincent leaned in and started apologizing profusely. That was a lot of words just for daring to get a little closer. He supposed he appreciated the concern, but he didn't really care.

"You may rest." It wasn't as if it'd compromise his mobility.

Bishop smirked. The temptation to say he already knew Strohmeier's name was strong, but he managed to hold back for the sake of the game.

"The name's Bishop." he said, looking at his cards. He picked a three and placed it down, then looked at the androids.

Willow kept an eye on Sixty, if anything, to be ready in case something got knocked down.

"Even twins have different personalities. These androids have been individuals for a short time and have been molded by their most recent experiences, but they still qualify as such." the cyborg replied, taking her gloves off, "But they're hardly at the end of their path. Perhaps Daniel will improve over time and so might Vincent. Artificial beings can heal too."

That went for Strasky too, as far as she was concerned. Willow reached for the nearest toy, taking a moment to focus on the feeling of the fabric provided by the sensors in her hands.

"The children need more items to decorate their rooms with. Their preferences, according to the last survey, seem to be dogs, felines, birds and have showed less interest in toys with bright colors." she listed, "Erica will likely claim whatever they will turn down. I suppose we should pick whatever catches our attention."

Then again, she could have used a few new plushies as well.

"Well, the hope is that they'll sort each other out…and maybe be nicer to him. Strasky basically felt responsible for everybody else, which worked out as well as it sounds." Rook said, giving a shrug, "And I feel like he doesn't want the help. I can try to cheer him up, but I'm not Strohmeier or one of the others."

She paused for a moment, then carefully reached out to pet Prince.

Seeing Vincent more at ease convinced the android Bishop to relax, or what passed for that while he gave mean glares to all the present before shifting his attention to the tools and yarn that were being laid out for him.

He briefly glanced in Dan's direction, before picking them up and getting to work.

Bishop contemplated the rules of the game for a moment, before nodding. "Noted."

He moved to sit down, taking a moment to study the other androids. He supposed he could do this for the sake of scientific curiosity. It would be interesting to see how well machines could lie.

"I doubt that device could affect me, but I'm confident it won't be necessary." he commented dryly with a smirk.

It wouldn't be like him to join anything without talking smack first.

Meanwhile, Willow was still quietly scanning the room, taking in all the toys while studying Sixty's behavior. The lack of coordination didn't seem to hinder him, prompting her to refrain from offering her help with it.

She kept her hands folded behind her back as she listened to Strasky. "I assume they share an uncanny resemblance while the other may be more calm and collected the way Nines prefers to carry himself. He might give the impression of a well trained puppy instead of an overstimulated one."

None of that was said as a critique. She appreciated more than anyone the way the androids were allowed to thrive while embracing their personalities.

"Bulb and Prince are good enough, I guess." Rook shrugged. A Pokémon and a scrunkly looking glass creature didn't need crazy names to stand out. "Yep. That's how siblings work. At least you know he's being obnoxious because he wants your attention and not for other reasons."

It was nice to see for a change. Every time she jumped over to this dimension, it felt like dysfunctional families were the norm.

"He's not, you're right, at least in the biological sense." Rook confirmed. "His mind isn't running on his brain anymore so I guess that cuts out all the chemicals that would normally make him all bouncy. I think it's still in there somewhere, but he's also older and very traumatized. The hope is that helping out his friends will give him some peace too."

[cassianaries]

Under the Gilded Lens - Luigi Mangione x reader

Synopsis: Luigi and Y/N had very different upbringings. Luigi went to a prep school, comes from a wealthy family. Y/N's life is the opposite of that. They never had a problem before navigating how different their upbringings, but when Luigi takes Y/N as a plus one to a Gilman alumni event, she starts to feel out of place and like she doesn't belong.

Warnings: Swearing, classism, fluff.

Word Count: 1,594

Y/N was getting over stimulated in the changing room at the department store, she had to have tried on at least a dozen of them, none of them were right. Luigi had informed her that his prep school, Gilman, was having an alumni night and he wanted her to accompany him. Luigi, being the planner that he was, told her enough time in advance about the event.

But Y/N being who she is, procrastinated till the last second about buying a dress for the event. Every time she tried to think about what she should fear to a fancy prep school alumni night, she would get overwhelmed and push it to the back of her mind. She regrets doing that now, as she stood in front of the full length mirror, twisting her body back and forth, in the last dress.

It was a black velvet floor length fitted gown, that was off the shoulder and long sleeved. She felt confident in it, but she wasn't sure. She had never been to an alumni event, let alone for a prestigious school. She wasn't sure if she was doing too much or not enough.

She was sure some would be sporting the most expensive and luxurious, not that she cared about gaining their approval or fitting in necessarily, she just didn't want to embarrass Luigi. This was his old prep school, where he graduated as valedictorian and gave a speech.

Maybe there was a little part of her deep deep down that wanted their approval. Luigi wasn't like them he didn't care about having the fanciest clothes, shoes, or displaying wealth in anyway. But this was Luigi's life, this is where he came from, how he grew up. When she met his family and his extended family a year into their relationship, she was excited.

It went well, his mom and dad were very kind and welcoming, they made her feel like she was a part of the family. His sisters were kind, asked questions, and seemed genuinely interested in getting to know her. Some of Luigi's aunts and uncles were a bit passive aggressive when talking to her. When they asked about her profession and she responded they gave her a patronizing smile and replied with a pat to her shoulder, "Luigi has always had such high standards, you must be very special".

She could see it in their face when she talked about her upbringing her attending public school her whole life, working two jobs to pay for her public university degree, and her humble profession that wasn't traditionally seen as "important" like being a doctor or engineer. That night did change something in her, it ripped at her self-esteem, it made her feel like she wasn't good enough for Luigi. She never really told him about the conversations because she didn't want to cause issues between them and his family.

When she was away from his family, she forgot about the feeling, but when she was near them, the feelings resurfaced. Luigi never made her feel like she wasn't good enough, if anything, he motivated her. He is always the first to celebrate her successes at work like when she got a promotion, he brought home flowers and dessert. He is her biggest cheerleader.

As she continued to examine the dress in the mirror, she facetimed Luigi to get a second opinion. When he responded he was laying on the couch in their apartment, a huge smile on his face.

"Hey baby, how's the shopping going? Did you find a dress?" he asked.

Y/n flipped the camera so that it was now showing her body. "What do you think of this one?" she asked.

Luigi sat up at full attention to examine the dress and give an opinion, "W-wow, I love it you look beautiful Y/N".

Y/N blushed and sighed in relief because she did not want to spend any longer in the department store. "Are you sure? Is it appropriate for a Gilman alumni event?"

"I think so, I don't think there's a dress code," he said.

"I just don't want to stick out like a sore thumb," Y/N said.

"You're definitely going stand out," he replied flirtatiously wiggling his eyebrows.

Y/N rolled her eyes, "Okay, I'm getting the dress. See you in a bit Lu." He laughed at her reaction and said, "Bye beautiful!"

*************

Y/N and Luigi were in the car on their way to the alumni event, Luigi had his hand on Y'N's thigh as he drove. She had been silent the entire drive. He squeezed her thigh gently to get her attention, "Are you alright? You've been quiet." he said. She looked over at him, he looked so handsome dressed in his suit. He had a concerned look on his face as he turned his head to pay attention to the road. "I'm fine, just a bit nervous, you know how I get at gatherings." she replied softly reaching to grab his hand and intertwine their fingers.

He brought her hand to his mouth kissing it, "I know, if you need to step out at any point, you give me the signal and we're out of there" he replied.

"What's the signal?" she asked.

"How about itching your nose?" he responded.

"Yeah let me just pick nose in front of all your former classmates and teachers, that'll be a great first impression," Y/N replied sardonically "Maybe the signal could be me telling you I want to leave."

"Perfect," he said a smirking.

********

They had been at the event for about 45 minutes now, Luigi had introduced you to his former classmates, who were quick to share embarrassing stories about Luigi during his time at Gilman. Y/N was having a great time, everyone was nice and very welcoming. She didn't feel like she was out of place, they weren't snobs or turning up their nose at her. That was until she met a former classmate of Luigi's named Bradley, who began asking questions about where you went to school. A small group had formed, Bradley and his date, a beautiful blonde who when Y/N smiled at her, looked her up and down, and looked away as if she weren't standing in front of her.

A few other former classmates who were on the robotics team with Luigi. "I actually went to a very different school than Gilman's, we didn't have all these fancy clubs and facilities that you all have," she replied. Bradley asked, "Well, what school did you go to?" he asked. Y/N stumbled a bit on her words now feeling the weight of everyone's stares, "I-I went to a public school, we didn't have very many clubs or opportunities that you guys had, you guys are lucky. It must be nice to have had that experience." Y/N replied. Bradley snorted, "I guess, it's not that big of a deal. But wait till you see the toilets their self-flushing, I bet your public school didn't have that."

Luigi saw Y/N's face fall as she turned to leave, not before she heard him call Bradley a "fucking dick". Y/N made her way to the car and could hear Luigi right behind her. She went to open the door, but he stopped her. "Baby, I'm sorry he said that. He's always been an asshole even when we were at school together." She just shrugged her shoulders, "It's fine, I'm used to it at this point." she replied. Luigi pushed her chin gently upwards so that he could look at her, "What do you mean you're used to it?" he asked. Y/N told him about how she felt and what was said by his extended family to her, Luigi was patiently listening to her as she told him everything.

"Lu, sometimes I feel like I don't deserve to be with you. That you deserve to date another person who did the prep school thing, who has an important and well-respected career, and who went to an ivy. That's not me, I'm not that. I'm not a part of your world, I don't fit in." she let out the breath she'd been holding, it felt good airing this out and expressing how she felt.

"I don't want to date someone who grew up like me. Even growing up around this, I never felt like I fit in with them even back then. Baby, I love you so much. Don't let these assholes make you feel like you're not important or that you don't deserve to be here, you do. I am so lucky that I get to call you mine, I want you and only you. You are important, what you do is important, and I don't care if you grew up rich or not. That shit doesn't matter to me." Luigi rubbed his thumb back and forth across her cheek and leaned down to kiss her lips, softly and slowly.

He pulled away, smiling down at her. "You are so intelligent-" kiss "You are so kind" - kiss "You are important" -kiss "You are beautiful" -kiss "I am so lucky" -kiss "That I" -kiss "Am in your life" -kiss "And I am so lucky that I get to call you mine" -kiss.

"I love you Y/N" whispered.

"I love you Luigi" you whispered back.

He kissed you one last time, rubbing his thumb on your bottom lip, the biggest smile plastered on his face and he admired you. "Let's get the hell out of here."

[kaivenom]

Hey same person who asked for OP DILF x MILF reader

How about them reacting to MILF reader having a kid? (Even funnier if it was like luffy or zoro lol)

OP DILFS dating a MILF who has a kid

Characters: Mihawk, Doflamingo, Crocodile, Smoker,Shanks.

A/N: Two things. First one: i love this, i really had a good time writing it, you have great ideas my dear anon. Second one: exams are finally oveeeer, so i would be trying to update more than usual to get all the requests out of the hoven for everyone.

Masterlist

Dracule Mihawk

After taking care of Zoro and Perona, he thinks that he is ready for everything.

One day you were both on the kitchen and he like ussual is reading paperwork.

"It looks like the new generation it's going strong, this kid seems a good swordsman." he shows you the picture.

"Drac, i think it's time for us to talk." he almsot felt fear for a moment, "that kid it's mine, not like you and Zoro, literally that is my son." his mind exploded, you never saw him that concerned.

"And when will you have said this to me?"

"I am telling you now... you know how difficult it's to date at our age, especcially being a woman who already has a kid?" he nodded and pushed you closer, "i planned on telling you soon, i just, didn't know how, i was expecting something like this to happen to have the oportunity to tell you.

"You are lucky i already have practice with that green haired boy... call him, we can set a dinner and i can meet him formally, maybe even bond?" you coudln't help but smile and kiss him.

Donquixote Doflamingo

He already has experience with children since he literally adopted a lot of them.

One day someone robbed on the royal treasure chamber of Dressrosa and he was furious, he was looking for you to help him relax.

"My dove, i need some of your assistance on my d..."

"And when i tell you i date someone your best idea it's to rob him? you are lucky i found you and your stupid friends before he did? and.... " you finally became aware of his presence, but his eyes were already glued to the teenager.

You grabbed your child by the collar of the shirt and went to the door, your previous angry look bacame softer seen how Doflamingo's eyebrows were frowning.

"This is my son... i called him to Dressrosa so you could finally meet him but he decided to 'prove you'... i dont know what was on his mind. I have the treasure located and coming back to the chamber."

"You have a child." Doflamingo looked at the verge of an aneurysm, gritting his teeth.

"I do, please, don't punish him... i thake the responsability." his lips curled in a strange smile, like he was trying to fake it.

"I am honored to meet your son, it's impressive to know how skilled he is, maybe he can join court..." clearly Doffy was having a hard time trying not to kill you son.

Sr. Crocodile

Experience 0, oblivious 100%

He was on his office, doing work and you appeared with your son.

"Croc..." he turned the chair and looked at you both, "dear, i told you i don't need more agents... i don't know how you contacted someone with such a high bounty but i don't need it." and he turned the chair again.

"This is my son..." Crocodile was thankfull for being backwards to you cause he choked on the cigar.

"Your what?"

"SIr Crocodile, i am (Y/N)'s son, i was hoping to meet you and bond a little, i wasn't expecting a job... but if you give it to me i am not going to complain."

"You already have a job as bounty hunter, don't try to take advantage of this." you poked your son's cheek under Crocodile's surprised look.

"I..." he cleared his throat, trying to sound serious and prepared, "pleasure to meet you child, i would have appreaciate it a warning."

"I warned you, i left a note on the fridge that said 'special meeting today, i have a surprise'" your son started to laugh.

"That sounded like a booty call, jajaja, maybe he was expecting you to come here in lingerie." you punched your son on the head to make him shut up.

"I can make a reserve on the restaurant we both like and i can know you better." he tried to sound profesional but your son was right, he tought you would give him a sexy surprise, not this.

Smoker

He was really tired of dealing with teenage pirates.

He spent the last week chasing and fighting agaisnt a new supernova, he was tired and just wants to get home to you.

"Hello love." he said while hanging his uniform, then he got to the living room and saw that same supernova playing cards with you, "i don't know what you are doing here bastard but you are not going to hurt my..."

"Relax old men, i was just paying a visit to my mother." Smoker got his mind reset.

"Smoker sweetie, this is my son."

"How couldn it be your son? you are a marine."

"Same happens with Garp, but he is a grandfather.... i think maybe this is a nice time for you two to meet." you were really nervous but tried to sound chill and smooth.

"Oh mother, we already know each other, thi sis the man that has been chasing me all week." the moment got worse every second and you wanted to hide, but you felt Smoker sat next to you and put his arm on your should, "noooo, cut the romantic things, i am going to throw up."

"Don't talk to us like that, yesterday i was furious that you were so childish but right now, i wont tolerate you talking to your mother or me with such a disrespectful tone." you had to hide a laugh, he clearly was getting his frustations out but at the same time trying to be nice. "so tell me, how can a son of a marine officer become a pirate?"

"Well..." and you knew that this would be a long night.

Akagami Shanks

Since Luffy and Uta, he was out of the parenting thing, for now.

You were sleeping and suddently canons started to burst on the ship, you got dressed and prepared to a new day at board.

"I am xxxxx, and i will defeat you, Red Head SHanks."

"On your dreams, child." canons were still bursting when you got on the ship and saw the attacker of the ship.

"Mom?" "Son?" you both said at the same time, Shanks mouth touched the ground.

"Come here you little prick, how could you blow the ship of your mother's fiancee."

"You are engaged? i didn't got the letter nor invitation, you don't love me or what? i know we don't live together anymore but..."

"I sent it yesterday, it should get to you in a couple of hours but... we took the covers of various newspapers, how could you not saw it?"

"You know i don't read that bullshit..." you both were yelling at each other from the ships, until Shanks decided to finally talk.

"And when i was going to know this?"

"Today!" he coudln't even talk, his mind was going to fast, another problematic child.

"Boy, stop blasting canons and get on the ship... i love your mother and i want to marry her, i can kill you."

"You are not going to kill me, i am going to defeat you."

"You can try, after the wedding and only if i am looking." you yelled at him and went to Shanks, "leave him, he is excited in reality to meet you."

"I must recompose myself, i must make him see i am a good stepfather."

[makeyoumine69]

Disease

𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: Patrick Bateman x Fem!Reader

𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘: After his failed attempt to charm you, Patrick can't stop thinking about you because you've completely occupied his mind and now the poor man can't get any rest and has to masturbate to thoughts of you almost every night.

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: Smut, masturbation, desperate Patrick, swearing, spanking, delusions, obsessive behavior, cum shot.

𝐖𝐎��𝐃𝐒: <1k

𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐆 𝐑𝐄𝐂: Lady Gaga—Disease💕

𝐀/𝐍: This is very random, I wrote it during my break at work because I had a very stressful day. Hope you enjoy it!

𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐊𝐒: [MASTERLIST]🪓

It was more than a feeling that tormented him all night long, not giving him a chance to sleep properly. This searing sensation like an itching wound, it drove him crazy and eventually Patrick gave in, throwing the soft blanket aside and the next second he groaned as he looked down at his groin.

"Fucking bitch," Bateman hissed through his clenched teeth as he finally allowed himself to pull down the briefs that seemed to be too tight. "I'll watch you bleed one day, I swear," his panting mixed with barely audible curses. "Oh-fuck…"

Eyes shut tight, the man gripped himself and the mere contact with his hot flesh made him arch his back, his legs shaking from the tension as if he were about to combust. These obsessive thoughts of you were like a fucking plague he couldn't get rid of. But maybe he wasn't really trying, maybe wanking off to the thought of you was something special, something different from all the other times he jerked off watching porn or… Maybe he just couldn't stand that you didn't fall in love with him right away?

"Mmhm, you will beg me for this," Bateman's voice was getting raspier and raspier with every stroke, his movements bordering on desperation. Chewing on his lip, he ignored the way his pre-cum was literally gushing around the expensive sheets, a few drops running down his flat abdomen. But he didn't care. "You're gonna beg me like a whore…and I'm gonna spit in your face…in your so-fucking-beautiful face," his cock twitched in his grasp as he imagined that it was your hand jacking him off now, that it was you lying here next to him in his king-sized bed. "I-I need you…so fucking much," he almost whimpered, rolling onto his side to hide his face in the pillow. "Why can't I just stop thinking about you?! Why? WHY?"

Huffing, Patrick picked up the pace, his hand sliding up and down his shaft in an almost feverish desperation; the wet, obscene sounds were a clear indication of how much he needed this—needed you. At one point, the man was about to gnaw on the pillow as he imagined fucking you in missionary…or maybe doggy or maybe prone? How about you on top, bouncing on his thick dick, your eyebrows furrowed as his girth was mercilessly splaying you open? No way. This fantasy was too delightful, but Patrick couldn't concentrate on anything in particular—he wanted it all at once. Fucking you on his bed, on the floor, against the wall, then lifting you up and making you wrap your legs around his waist.

When the loud moan fell from his lips, he knew it wouldn't take long for him to cum. Crumpling the covers, Bateman thrust relentlessly into his hand as if his life depended on it. Missionary…he would fuck you like this because he wanted to see your face when he would sheath himself so deep inside you that you would have to shush yourself with your hand. But then you would become as needy as he was, your hand kneading his biceps, his broad back, gradually moving down to his firm ass to give it a squeeze and then a sharp slap.

"Arghh-fuck," he groaned into the pillow before slapping himself, only feeding his delusional fantasy, but holy shit, why did it feel so real? "Mmhg-you're going to be so full of my c-cum-fuck!"

Trembling like a leaf in the wind, Patrick exploded into his hand, but he didn't stop pumping himself, even though his hand was starting to hurt from the intensity of his movements. Flustered, covered in sweat and tears, he spilled himself on the sheets, but even when he was completely spent, the image of you was still so fresh and real inside his head. Your bratty voice teased him all over again and he could swear that one day he would really make you submit to his will, but now all he could do was lie alone in his perfect apartment and dream of that very moment he would share with you.

P.S. Thank you for reading until the end! I don’t have a taglist. You can follow my writing community to know when I update!💞

[rafeysdeer]

imperfect for you (aka insecure reader x comforting rafe)

kook!reader x rafe cameron

prompt: a party that was supposed to be relaxing and to clear the head goes terribly wrong, leaving a very anxious and insecure reader, good thing she has her very caring boyfriend who knows exactly how to take care of her.

a/n: okay, that's the first time i write for rafe, i really like obx and rafe, so i tried my best in here, but i didn't really like it, i think it's bcs it's my first time writing about him. english is not my first language, i hope you guys like it 💗

You weren't exactly excited about going to this party, but you knew your boyfriend was, and you didn't want to be a party pooper, and at least you'd be with him, nothing bad would happen if you gave up and went to a party, right?

Well, you were wrong, terribly wrong, even though you were a kook, you never exactly fit in, you never got the right friends, and even though you were pretty, guys just didn't seem to be interested in you.

That was until, Rafe Cameron laid eyes on you, in your little sundress, having a drink at the club, just looking for some peace, you looked almost ethereal in his eyes, and he just knew you were meant to be together, it took a while to convince you of that. You spent most of the talk thinking it was some bad joke, because there was no way, Rafe Cameron, the king of kooks, was there, talking to you, interested in you and not on your hot friend, or literally anyone else.

You two get along almost instantly, his charm had you wrapped around his finger, and you loved it.

It had been months since you two started dating, but you still didn't feel like you fit into his social circle. So when, the first moment he separated from you at the party, a girl purposely bumped into you, spilling her drink on your short dress and whispering 'Whore' in your ear, you were sure.

Rafe didn't get it why you suddenly looked so upset, but he wanted everything, but to see his girl upset, so when he suggested for you, that you two go home, you happily headed towards the truck.

"Sweetheart, you need to talk to me. What the hell happened that you suddenly look like a kicked puppy?" and it only took his playful words for you to burst into tears in the passenger seat, it wasn't just the girl or the stained dress, everything looked too much, and you looked so small, a girl being an bitch was all you needed to lose it.

Rafe immediately looked at you with his blue eyes filled with concern. "Hey, love, I was just kidding, you don't look like a kicked puppy, I swear." he says trying to understand what happened to make you break down.

You looked up at him, your pretty eyes shining with tears. "I just-, I don't feel like I fit in, Rafey, like i fit right in with you, but i'm just unwanted by everyone else," she says, her voice cracking with tears. "I tried to fit in, but I've been around these people my whole life, and they've never liked me, and now I feel like I'm holding you back, or making them look down at you"

Now, he looks like a kicked puppy as he looks at you with a worried expression. "Honey, you don't have to fit in, those people at the party, they don't like me either, they look at me like shit too and that's not your fault, not at all, you don't need to fit in with them because you think you have to because of me, the only person I need by my side, is you."

She blinks her bright eyes at him, as if the words had run away from her mind. The car stops in front of the house, and he gets out, opening the door for her, greeting her with a kiss before the words even come back to her. "I love you, no matter what any of those assholes think, because you're the one who's here for me, not them."

She looks at him, looking almost wonderstruck, a smile breaking across her face, wrapping her arms around his neck. "The only person I need is you, Rafe," she says, knowing that the feeling was mutual. "What do you say we go inside, put you in some comfy clothes, and watch Sex and the City?" She laughs at how well he knows her as they walk into the house, his hand around her waist.

"Sounds perfect."

[cockettechris]

𝑭𝑬𝑬𝑫𝑩𝑨𝑪𝑲 － 𝑪.𝑺.

divider by: @bernardsbendystraws

Summary: Chris was well known, in the porn world that is. He didn't really care what anyone else thought he had a good job and that's all that mattered to him. It never really got brought up that often but tonight when everyone is around their friends and intoxicated, you decide to change that.

Pairing: pornstar!Chris x reader

Warnings: smut, p in v, choking, recording the boombyah, chris being hot, idk what else

A/N: this is based off of the conversation I had with @cvnntagious ps!Chris bot, please go check her stuff out🙏

The cold leather couch felt cold on your legs, goosebumps trickling your skin. The sexual topics being brought up made you uncomfortable to say the least. But why should it? You're an adult. You shouldn't feel uncomfortable with this type of stuff.

You being you, you didn't talk. Your "closed off" body language wasn't noticeable, or so you thought. You thought no one noticed until Chris himself spoke up "C'mon ma, don't tell me this is disturbin' you or somethin'." Oh god. That nickname, you fucking hated it when he called you that. Despite the wetness growing between your legs.

"No I'm alright." you said softly, though Chris didn't believe it. "I think you're full of shit, but you're sure?" he said in a soft tone that almost, almost, made you wanna go down on him. "Yeah, why? Did you ask something I didn't hear or?" he chuckled in response, "Nah, just noticed ya look tensed up or something. You're not used to these kinds of conversations?" you smiled softly, "Not really, it's not everyday I hang out with a pornstar or onlyfans star."

He smirked, "Oh so you know what I do then?" he's clearly amused by this. His gaze lowers to your lips for a split second before meeting back up to your eyes "What did ya look me up or somethin'?" you chucked, "Don't boost your ego you just popped up on Twitter." A smirk landed on his pink lips at your sassy remark, realizing you're probably not as shy as you seem. "Shoulda clicked on my profile ma, trust me you'd like it."

Your smile only grew, "No I saw, need to work on your moans though. They sound fake." he let out a scoff with a small laugh, "Yeah? How could I improve?" "I'm not showing you it's your job not mine." You both laughed, clearly enjoying the playful banter between you both. "C'mon doll you know I like getting feedback." You shook your head before speaking, "Okay well, don't be so quiet. No one likes that. Moan more, whimper more, dirty talk, I don't care just don't make it quiet." You quickly shut your mouth after that, realizing your hormones took over for a second, the wetness only growing between your legs.

He smirked at your statement, his tongue poking the inside of his cheek, "Wasn't expecting that from ya. But how do you expect me to do all of this perfectly without any practice ma? Hm?" "Yeah do it yourself pretty boy." You said as you got up to go get yourself a drink. He chuckled at how quickly you got up. "Hey can you get me 'nother Pepsi while you're out there?" You looked at him with a confused face before grabbing him another can of Pepsi anyway. He smiled as you handed him the can, eyes trailing down your body as he spoke, "Hey c'mere for a second. Needa tell ya somethin'." Hesitantly, you sat beside him. The cold leather making you shiver slightly.

"You know.." he started, "I wouldn't mind your help with practice, from what ya said earlier. 'Bout how I need to be more loud. "If I say yes will you leave me alone with this?" you said annoyed. His smirk came back at your question. "All ya gotta do is say yes ma.." "Fine." you said with a huff. Not because you didn't want it, no you wanted it. Bad. But because you knew you'd get attached after this and he'd see it as nothing more than a one night stand. He started kissing your neck softly, a soft breath leaves your lips before saying "Right here? Can we at least go to an empty bedroom or something?" He chuckled against your neck, before pulling away and taking your hand as he led you to what you hoped was his bedroom.

The first thing he did when you guys walked into the bedroom was lock the door. He didn't want anyone to see what was his, or what he wanted to be his. He turned around and faced you, slowly walking towards you. "Fucking hate how attractive you are and how much I like you." You said as you kissed him roughly. His eyes widened at the sudden kiss, but is quick to reciprocate it as his hands move to each side of your jaw. He steps forward which causes you to push back into the wall. You moaned into the kiss, which gave Chris the perfect opportunity to add his tongue to the mix.

Before you know it your clothes are scattered all over the floor along with Chris' clothes. You're pretty sure you saw Chris put your underwear in his nightstand drawer but fuck you didn't care. Not when he was pounding into you from behind at an ungodly fast pace. "Fuck ma- taking me so well." You only moaned in response, not like you could form a sentence anyway. "Chris please-" you managed to get out, "Please what? Use your words." "Need your hand-" you couldn't finish your sentence so you just took his hand and guided it to your throat. He squeezes, but not enough to hurt you but enough to make you feel good. "F–Fuck baby, just needed my hand wrapped around ya throat huh?"

"Such a good lil slut f'me." He groaned out. His free hand that was on your hip grabbed his phone, his metal bracelet making you shiver. "Wan' record ya mama. Is that okay?" You whined and nodded. He was quick to start recording, making sure he gets the perfect view of you taking him, all of him. "Chris 'm close." "Yeah? Cum all over my cock. Fuck.." All it took was Chris to hit your g-spot one more time for you to break. A white ring forming around the base of his cock. He lets go of your throat and switches his phone into his other hand, his free hand coming to rest on your hip. "I'm close, gonna cum all over your pretty ass mama." And with that he pulled out quick enough to have his hot cum spurt all over your ass.

He's quick to stop recording and upload the video to his OnlyFans and Twitter. When he's done with that he starts a bath for the both of you. Once your both done with your bath he hands you a pair of boxers and one of his shirts. He puts his boxers back on and some pajama pants. You cuddle up to his chest once you both lay down and he runs his fingers through your tangled hair. He grabs his phone and checks the video. "Wow." He says softly, you hum in confusion as he explains that the video has done better than any other one he's uploaded. "Yeah the people in the comments fucking love you ma, saying they've had a better orgasm than ever. Think that means I'm gonna have to keep you." And with that he kisses your forehead as you fall into a deep sleep.

Tags:

@cvnntagious @sturnobsessedwh0re @sturniolos-manslut19 @sturniolosluttt @mattsfavbitchhh @livy4swift @pip4444chris @christophersturnn @ariastur9z @sturniolosarethebest @sturnioq @chrislilcumslvt @conspiracy-ash @courta13 @emely9274

A/N: can you tell I got lazy towards the end LMAO. Two posts in one day who is this?? lmk if you wanna be added to the taglist!!

[dunmeshistash]

ive always wondered if milsiril's overprotectiveness of kabru was less because of infantilisation (although she def like all elves has that problem) and more so out of guilt. she was a captain of the canaries during the Utaya incident I believe and she witnessed what happened and she couldn't stop it. and she left the canaries because of it and took in the kid who was the Only survivor, raised him in extreme comfort so he'd never see the horrors again and didn't want him anywhere near the dungeons! like i think learning self defense for defenses sake would have made her hesitant but she would have obliged but because it was specifically for the dungeons she was so against it. also like he must have had a rough few years dealing with that trauma as well which doubled her protectiveness

I believe it's a mixture of both, I don't think you can really take away the guilt (actually unsure if that's the best word to describe it) nor the race relations from how Milsiril sees Kabru.

I am the Milsiril apologist ™ but the fact she see's Kabru as a child even now is a big part of their relationship, she's a mother that can't grow up (both for being an elf and for her own issues) and that has to cope with her children outgrowing her fast

Putting a read more cause as usual when it's about Milsiril I talk too much

We can see in every way Milsiril acts that she sees Kabru at most as a toddler during his time with her, she's hand feeding him, has him in a room full of toys and talks about him like he's a cute baby.

I think people are too mean about this side of Milsiril tbh. I think it makes her interesting and it's clear (to me at least) that she does her best to provide for her children even if she doesn't truly understands them. Even in that first interaction with Kabru where she's trying to hand feed him they were *already* training with swords beforehand.

Milsiril also talks to Kabru in a way that kinda seems to expect him to understand more than what a small child would like we can see in the AB extra

So her infantilization doesn't extend to underestimating him at least, rather I think that's how she shows affection (which is still bad 😭)

Anyway, about her trauma with the dungeon and guilt (or maybe shame? Fear?), I do think that was one of the motivations for her to take Kabru in as I said in this post (beware I am a Milsiril apologist and I am VERY biased in seeing her in a more positive light, doesn't mean it's true) but I think that side of her manifests in her sudden switches from crybaby mom to ruthless master

Milsiril is very emotionally unstable from what we can see, she's really trying to convince Kabru not to go into dungeons and when tears don't work she switches into training him so hard he'll give up on his own. I've seen people call this her "true colors" or say she was using "crocodile tears" but in my opnion both the tears and the threat are genuine, I don't think it's a planned switch but rather the fact she's unstable to begin with, both the crybaby mom and the scary swords master are her true self.

Anyway! I think both guilt and infantilization are intertwined in her love towards Kabru, I've said this before but she's a flawed caretaker in a world where she does not have the resources to become a better one. She's traumatized she's depressed and she's an elf, but she's the only one (that we know) willing to at least *try* to treat the people she cares for the correct way. If it wasn't for Milsiril Kabru would have been raised by elves like Rin was (and we know that went very bad, they traumatized her), and Mithrun might not have received the proper rehab he needed to go back into the canaries (He might have managed but we see Milsiril put in the effort to help him cope besides being the one to tell him about Utaya)

That is all to say: Milsiril is still flawed!! It's part of what I love about her, and it's the reason so many people dislike her too. I'm saying this cause sometimes when I go on my Milsiril rants I get asks putting down Kabru to raise her up and that's like, very uncomfortable lmao. Even if she did her best he still was the one that to deal with all of her shortfallings while being raised and he's still the one responsible for getting to where he is, she just made is easier than it could have been.

Disclaimer as is usual for my Milsiril posts: I'm a Milsiril fan, my interpretations of her are very charitable because I often see people being way too uncharitable about her. Please read the original material and make up your own interpretation, this posts only contain what I think it's relevant for my point not an objective view of the whole. I've also already made several posts about her and I don't want to keep repeating myself so if you think I glossed over something important that's probably why.

Edit: thinking more about it, maybe rather than feeling guilty herself she might blame "elves" as a whole for the failure in Utaya, it does say she left it "in disgust". It's not that clear how she feels about it.

I still think it's shared trauma though, I don't think it's possible for Milsiril to not have been affected by what happened there and I think it's part of why she doesn't want Kabru to go to dungeons again. But her way to cope is to turn away from it (and blaming "elves" might be part of how she copes) while Kabru's is to face it so it doesn't happen again

[concretejunglefm]

I'm not ready to let you forget me (part 1).

*edit credit goes to the lovely @defuckingthrone-dot-com

You told your friends you want me dead And said that I did everythin' wrong And you're not wrong

An anon request for lovers to enemies 

Summary: It’s been two years since Noah cheated on you, abruptly ending your relationship. However, the universe seems to have a peculiar sense of humor in its plan to reunite you.

Pairing: Noah Sebastian x reader.

CW: none really. Mentions of cheating, Noah can be an overall asshole and a tad bit of angst.

WC: 3.2k.

Dividers: Silent-stories.

Had Noah cheated, you believe that you could've handled everything a lot better, but somehow what he did had been worse.

It wasn't cheating, even if you couldn't ignore the pit in your stomach when you thought about him and her together.

Noah's ex had joined the last leg of his tour as an opening act, and while under any other circumstances it wouldn't have bothered you, his nonchalant attitude about it did. 

This had been a man who spent time after time cursing her out to you, pushing aside any doubts or worries you had felt when it came to her, and now he didn't care if she was joining him in the most important aspect of his life.

Even worse was how he’d knocked back your own suggestion of joining him.

"It's only for a few days. I'll get to watch you play, and we can see it as a vacation." "You can see it as that. For me, it's work, babe. You know that, and you know how important it is to me." "I know I just thought." "Well, don't. Not this time. Maybe next time."

You did your best to brush off the hurt at the time, and now again as the memory resurfaces.

Noah didn't cheat, but what he did was close enough to make you feel heartbroken and forgotten about.

Messages and calls came less and less during this leg, and now you were sitting up early Saturday morning going through the posts on your Twitter feed like a fool, allowing yourself to be more hurt with each one that you came across.

@badoxmens: Did you see Noah and his ex on stage last night?

@ieatconcreeete: I hope this means they're finally getting back together !!

@artitficalsuicide: If I were his girlfriend, I would hate myself right now.

@deduckingthrone: Noah has a girlfriend? Are you sure? Him and his ex looked pretty cozy if he does.

The videos and pictures which accompanied the tweets did nothing to ease the rising bile in your throat, and every attempt to reach Noah was left unanswered.

Noah ignored every single text and call you made to him, not bothering to even make it obvious that he was ignoring you, the delivered and read notifications driving you mad until you had to stop yourself altogether.

Instead of breaking up with you, he ghosted you, your only proof of this coming a week later when another set of videos and photos showed up on your feed of him attending the album launch party of his ex.

There was no ignoring the closeness between them, the way he lingered by her in the one video, the way they were caught slipping off together and hovering a little too closely in another.

You almost went to write out a long-winded text, one full of all your feelings for everything that had transpired over the past week, but instead settled for a simple 'fuck you'. Even going as far as to block and delete his number to not allow for any temptation in reaching out to him.

You deserved better than this, that whatever had transpired for Noah to play with your feelings in this manner and you decided then that you'd do whatever it took to move on.

"What you need is a girls’ trip." The suggestion from your best friend came as no surprise, Sloan would always choose a spa day or a girls’ trip whenever she felt a need to unwind, which was practically every week according to her.

"Huh?" You snap back from your own thoughts, mindlessly stirring a spoon in your latte.

"Babe, please tell me that you are not still hung up on that guy." You hear both the pity and disdain in her tone.

To Sloan boys were nothing more than toys to be played with, to be thrown down and picked back up whenever she wanted. That was her trick to not being hurt.

"It's been two years."

"I know." You don't even need to give her a real answer for her to know, but it still doesn't stop your mind from wandering and from the pang in your chest each time you think about him.

“Girls’ trip, this weekend and I'm not taking no for an answer."

You wish that she had taken no for an answer.

A girl’s trip sounded delightful until she suggested Vegas and you were squeezing yourself onto a last-minute flight there. You wouldn't have minded had it not been for the fact that your seats were apart from one another and you had been given a middle seat, which meant you were now stuck in between two strangers.

Moving along the aisle towards your seat, you slide your weekend bag from your shoulder and toss it into the overhead bin. Looking down at your ticket, you confirm the seat number and tuck a piece of hair behind your ear as you tap on the shoulder of the man sitting on the end seat, covered up with a black hoodie.

"Excuse me. I'm 33B." You gesture to the empty space beside him, and the minute you catch a familiar pair of brown eyes gaze back at you, you feel your heart plummet into your stomach and bile rising up your throat.

Noah.

You're ready to make a dash towards the back of the plane, either to throw up in the bathroom or attempt to throw yourself out of the emergency exit.

"Sor—."

He cuts himself off on the sight of you, and you huff as he moves himself and allows for you to squeeze past.

When you fall into the middle seat, you find Jolly sitting on the other side of you and realize that they must be on their way to a show. 

In Vegas? 

You almost turn and ask him but decide not to. You spent the last two years ignoring his and his band's existence; you can do that for another hour on this flight.

When you dare a glance in Jolly's direction, he's already sliding his headphones on and looking out of the window, completely disengaging himself. You're almost jealous. You'd do anything to disappear from this moment's event, even exchange seats with the Swede so as not to be sat next to Noah.

As the flight pulls out to taxi, you feel Noah's leg bouncing against your own. You know it's his nerves. He's always been a nervous flyer, and it makes you wonder why he's choosing to fly instead of driving to Vegas.

You mentally smack yourself because it's not your place to wonder these things or even care about them anymore.

"Will you stop that?" You finally voice your annoyance as the plane begins its descent down the runway.

"You know I'm a nervous flyer!" He retorts, and yes, you do know, but he's not supposed to highlight that fact.

“Yeah, but it's annoying." You snipe beneath your breath.

"I can't help it!"

You sound like a couple of squabbling kids, and you hit your knee against his as if to prove a point for him to stop, but he only bounces his leg harder.

It's as if he's purposely trying to piss you off, and unfortunately for you, it's working.

"Just—" You reach over and press your hand down on his thigh, forcing his leg still. "There. Stop."

He does stop, but then you feel his larger tattooed hand atop yours, and his fingers slip beneath and around your own as if choosing to accept this as you giving him some form of comfort.

You're not, but you can hardly pull your hand away as the plane begins to take off and you feel his fingers tightening around yours, signifying his general fear and discomfort over flying.

That is until you're hit with the reminder that this guy ghosted you, and you owe him nothing.

You snatch your hand back, glaring at him as he looks down at you.

"What was that for?"

“Oh, please, you're a big boy. Hold your own damn hand if you're that scared." You don't hold back on the mockery in your tone, crossing your arms over your chest.

"I was always there for you, and this is how you repay me?"

“Oh, please, you were there for your own ego."

You feel Noah lean in closer to you and you edge yourself away as best as you can without causing too much disruption to Jolly tucked in the window seat.

"You could at least try to make this work."

You hear him whisper, and your mouth drops open due to the utter audacity this man has to even suggest such a thing.

"Why would I do that when you did such a great job proving you're not worth the effort?" You snipe back, keeping your voice low.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You're really choosing now to play dumb? God, you really are all muscle and no brains now, aren't you?"

You couldn't ignore the fact that over the past two years he had buffed out even more than you can remember.

Noah had always been physically fit during the time you were together, with muscles coming in, but there was something more toned and larger about him now. 

It was a noticeable enough sight that could have any girl drooling over him.

But not you. 

You refused to engage with the thought.

"So what you're saying is you think I look hot?"

You don't need to look at him to see it; you can hear the smirk in his voice, and it makes you shake with anger at how unfazed he appears by all of this. 

You can't resist jabbing your elbow into his side, resulting in him letting out a whine which draws the attention of passengers around you to look over.

"What was that for?" Noah grumbles, bringing a hand to his side as he rubs the spot you’d caught. 

"Because you're a dumbass." You spit out between gritted teeth.

"Excuse me, is there a problem here?" You haven't even noticed the seatbelt signs turn off, and when you look up, you spot a young air hostess peering in at you both. The moment her eyes catch sight of Noah, you spot that sudden flash of recognition in her own.

"Here we go," You mumble under your breath, rolling your own eyes as you direct your head forward and press back against the headrest. 

You wait to hear it, his charm that he always uses whenever there's a fan who recognizes him in a place he doesn't want to be noticed.

He's suave with it, and it always made you swoon in the beginning because you believed that he was merely trying to seek out his privacy for you both, but now you realize it was just one of his many tactics for keeping up some reputation he felt the need to uphold.

"Well, well... It looks like someone has good taste in music. You just made my day… but if you don't mind keeping it between us?"

You scoff and press your lips together when feeling the heat of a stare on you, but the air hostesses' quiet giggling is enough to prove that his little charm worked.

Shaking your head, you roll your eyes. "Real smooth." You remark once she leaves down the plane aisle to attend to another passenger.

"It worked on you, didn't it?"

"Don't flatter yourself. That was after five drinks, and I'd been eyeing up Folio all night."

"Oh—"

"Will you both quit it before I bang your heads together!" Jolly cuts Noah off, interrupting your squabbling.

"She started it." Noah argues, and your head turns back to him as you shoot him a glare. 

If looks could kill, you'd have done it multiple times by now.

The rest of the flight wasn't any easier, between playing elbow hockey with Noah over the armrest and more snide remarks, you were thankful the moment the plane came into land, unbuckling your belt and attempting to move the moment the seatbelt sign turned off.

"The plane hasn't even come to a stop." Noah points out as you attempt to stand, ushering him to move out of your way.

"I don't care, just move." You huff and glare down at him as he remains still, his tattooed hands sitting and tapping on his thighs, barely giving you a brief glance.

"Not even a please? You're so rude."

You know that you shouldn’t, but you begin to attempt climbing over him, holding onto the seat in front as you try to drag yourself past him and over his lap, muttering as you go. "And you are absolutely incorrigible."

"Wow, that's a new one. Is it your word of the day?"

You glance behind him and see him attempting to push back into his seat more, as if that's helping you in any way, and when you see his hand raise, you instinctively swat at it with the assumption he's going to touch you. 

"Ow?! There was no need for that."

Finally free from your row, you huff and pull yourself together, reaching for the overhead bin and pulling out your bag. 

“Well, this was fun. I really hope we never have to do it again." You glare at him and begin making your way down the aisle with the rest of the passengers towards the exit door.

You've never been happier to see the back of a plane in your life, moving as fast as your legs will let you through the crowd of people, almost missing the sound of Sloan's voice as she calls after you.

"Wait up, speedy!" She laughs as she finally catches up, and you come to a slow down, shaking your head free of all the thoughts which had been swirling around in there due to the unexpected reunion you just briefly had with your ex.

"Sorry. I just had to get out of there."

"That wasn't who I think it was, was it?" You spare a glance over at Sloan, and your irritated expression gives that answer away. "It was? What was he doing on a plane to Vegas?"

"I can't say I really cared to ask him, Sloan." Your tone has a bite still left over from the sniping that you and Noah had done. "Sorry, he just really gets under my skin."

"I can see that."

"The sooner we're at the hotel, the better. Then I can wash this whole thing off me, and we can finally start enjoying our girls' weekend."

"Yes! Girls’ weekend. No talk about stupid boys." Sloan slips her arm around yours, linking you together as she lets out an excited 'woohoo'. It makes you laugh, and you finally feel the tension that being sat next to Noah for the last hour had caused, slipping away.

It's a feeling which is short-lived, however.

After making your way through the airport and standard checks, you reach the taxi rank outside, and as you open the door, you turn back to call for Sloan, only to be met with the 6'3 asshole who's covered in tattoos.

“Oh, thanks, you shouldn't have." He flashes you a grin as he slides into your taxi, followed by Jolly, who offers you a brief apologetic look. Maybe you should've been giving him a harder time if he was enabling this stupid behavior.

You stand speechless as they pull the door close, tossing daggers at the cab as it drives away and a scream rumbles in your throat. 

"Where's the taxi?" Sloan asks as she chooses now to join you. You grumble something incoherent under your breath as you turn to wave down the next incoming taxi.

She's now joining Noah and Jolly on your shit list.

"It's going to be perfect! There's a spa, three pool areas. One of them is an infinity pool off the balcony upstairs." Sloan continues to drone on about the hotel and everything it includes. You only have a weekend here, but she's already planning multiple ways for you to take advantage of everything.

Currently, your mind is back on Noah and his stupid, smug ass face as he stole your taxi. You try to distract yourself from it, shaking him from your thoughts and coming back into the present, to this weekend.

Seeing him was a blip, but you refused to allow him to derail your plans or excitement.

Counting the room numbers down the hallway, you look up as you come closer to yours, room number: 308. 

Sloan has the room opposite you, disappearing inside after making plans to knock on after shower and changing. A shower sounds perfect right about now, not only to wash off the plane smell but also with being in such proximity to Noah in general.

As you fiddle with the room key, you hear a familiar voice, which causes your back to raise. Turning your head, you peer down the hallway, watching a group of familiar faces grow nearer to you. Noah is the one trailing behind, while Folio and Matt's voices are the ones you hear echoing down the hall.

You hastily attempt to open your hotel room door, being met with the red light before trying again.

You huff and close your eyes to calm yourself from growing irrationally angry.

Hearing the voices past you, you open your eyes and look back to find Noah standing at the door next to yours, room number: 310.

"Hey, neighbor." Noah flashes you a grin, and you shake your head in protest.

"No."

"No?" He repeats back at you in a question, his brows knitting together. "What do you mean no?"

"I mean no, we are not neighbors, and you cannot be here. Not in this room, not in this hotel. Hell, not even in this state." You're being irrational, but you never did quite have much rationality when it came to him. You always found yourself diving in headfirst to whatever thought crossed your mind.

"And who said this? You?" Noah raises a brow at you, taking a step closer as he leans a hand against the wall.

He easily towers over you, and under any other circumstance before now, that would have you weak at the knees and buckling for him, but right now it has you infuriated that he's somehow here, ruining your weekend and attempting to charm you.

"Yes."

"Still as bossy as ever, I see."

"And you're still an asshole." You snipe back, your eyes narrowing, still attempting to get your keycard in your door and slip away from this conversation.

"Ouch, that hurt." Noah raises his free hand, bringing it to his chest, feigning a tone of disbelief and hurt while you roll your eyes in response.

“Oh, please, that would insinuate you had any feelings to begin with."

"I have a lot of feelings, actually. Such as feeling sorry for you while watching you struggle with something so easy. Here, let me."

Before you have a chance to protest, he's reaching out to take your hotel room key and slips it into the swipe, drawing it out to a flashing green light.

You huff as you open the door, pushing forward, and the last thing you hear before the door slams is another final snarky remark from him; "Not even a thank you?"

Once in the safety of your room, you let out a loud scream of frustration, only to hear Noah's chuckle from the other side of the door, and you gently bang the back of your head against the door as you lean back on it.

Great, now you really can't escape him this weekend.

[bunybunn]

I fee like it really showcase how Dream does things to look good more than anything.

Speaking of Wilbur situation Dream responded after Wilbur posted his "apology" and if you see how he formulated it he proved that he is capable of understanding how an proper apology should look like. Hell he even talked about how important it is to believe the victim. Looking back at it with the perspective of his reaction to Caiti taking about her experience it seems that either just hypocritical or simply dishonest.

What makes even worse he didn't just show George support after the guy make his video. Like correct me if I'm wrong but he started defending George first before George even addressed it. He very much inserted himself there without hesitation ready to invalidate not only Caiti's story but also her feelings. That's what made the reaction feel so fucking sexist.

Similarly with how women that were part of Dream smp was treated make his "I respect all the members of the smp" feel ironic... Which also makes me notice how he only calls out his audience when other people started to making a big deal out of it and he never got proper called out for how the woman were treated there since technically speak he wasn't the only one responsible. As long as it doesn't make him look bad he doesn't care.

Also I need to add to this again, sorry for the 3 people that follow me and are done seeing this

But the fact that Dream’s first reaction when he learned about Caiti accusing George of SA her was to directly think that it was Aimsey master plan feels slightly sexist/hypocrite to me.

Dream made a long ass post telling Wilbur to fuck off for what he’s done to Shubble etc.

But when a girl accuses your best friend of grooming her, ur first reaction is directly « it’s fake, it’s a plan to make us seen bad ». Are u fucking kidding me? Your first reaction was to think she was lying, A RECURRENT THING ASSHOLES SAY TO WOMEN. How can u say that u care for women after this? Being a true ally to women is to detach yourself from known/alleged abuser INCLUDING YOUR BEST FRIEND.

And detaching yourself from abuser is something Tommy did without hesitation (you know the guy that Dream called without a backbone)

Dream you are such a fucking hypocrite and everyday u prove it more and more.

Edit (just me ranting more) : This also connects with the fact that he never supported the women on the DSMP, never said anything about them getting so much hate bc of their gender/bc they were close friends etc, he didn’t care then and he for sure doesn’t care now.

[nick-writes-stuff]

You and Me 'til the End, Right?

Kang Dae-ho x gn!reader

!warnings: canon-typical violence, descriptions of panic attacks and PTSD, manhandling/forced pat down (idk how to phrase that one), swearing, very hurt with eventual comfort

a/n: DAE-HO FIC TIME! HELL YEAH! I'm so down bad for this man. this is the iconic "helping dae-ho with his panic attack" fix-it fic bc holy shit he needs a hug. hope you enjoy <3

-

You had been fighting off an anxiety attack since Gi-hun and the others began their plan to usurp control of the games. You almost wanted to tell them not to do it. It likely wouldn't end well for all of you, and the idea that any of them could get hurt or worse scared you shitless.

You felt even more worried when Dae-ho volunteered to help. You could see from his face that he really didn't want to do it, but refusing was hardly what would be expected from an ex-marine. He didn't want to let anyone else down. Especially Jung-bae. If he was going, then how could he say no? Even though the idea of holding a gun again made him sick to his stomach.

You were observant, but you were especially observant of Dae-ho as you found it hard not to be entranced by his charm. This made you seem the little things he thought he masked well. During the six-legged race, you saw him flinch after every single shot fired. His gaze went distant, and his jaw clenched. One night while on watch, you heard him murmuring and tossing around in his sleep, clearly having a nightmare. He had never said it specifically, but you knew his time in the Marines had not been a happy one. Not at all. Which is what scared you about him volunteering for the ensuing gunfight.

As he started to walk toward Hyun-ju and Gi-hun, you grabbed his wrist to get his attention. He turned back to look at you.

"Be careful, okay?" You said softly.

He gave you a boyish smile. "Of course." He said. You could see how tense he was, however. He definitely wasn't 100% on board with this plan. You could tell from the way his hand trembled when he reached out for the gun.

Watching your strongest allies and closest friends walk out that door was one of the hardest things you have ever done. You couldn't even say proper goodbyes, and you didn't know if any of them were ever going to come back.

You started pacing back and forth after only a moment after they left. You couldn't just stand there. You needed to expel your nervous energy somehow. You also started absent-mindedly picking at your cuticles, a nervous habit you've had no success in breaking.

You didn't know how this was going to go. Sure, the players had the element of surprise, but they had a lot less resources than the guards. You could hear the echoes of gunshots from down the hall. They were far away, but they still made you feel uneasy. The guards could easily storm this room in retaliation.

After a few minutes, the other players had mostly returned back to normal, except most of them were now sitting behind some form of cover. You envied their ability to calm their emotions, but you also knew that, for the Os certainly, it was likely due to indifference. The more people who died in the rebellion meant the less competition and higher prize pool. The thought of it made you sick to your stomach. You couldn't imagine anyone being so callous about a human life, but the people in the games weren't the most morally upstanding.

You continued to pace, despite Jun-hee's half-hearted pleas for you to join them behind cover. You couldn't sit still right now. You were never able to handle anxiety well.

This continued on for a while. Eventually, Geum-ja said, "They are gonna wear holes in the floor at this rate." You didn't respond to her.

You glanced at the door, finally stopping when you saw Dae-ho walk back in. You let out a breath you didn't know you were holding. You rushed over to him as he dropped down in front of the guard nearest the door.

He seemed frantic. He was trembling as he walked, hardly able to make it to his destination. You could hear him mumbling something, but you couldn't make it out. You felt your heart wrench watching him in this state.

You approached him cautiously. You didn't want to scare him more than he already was. "Dae-ho? What's going on?" You asked. He whipped his head up, fumbling around in the guard's pocket. "Why are you here by yourself?" You heard Player 7 chime in from behind you. Seems like you weren't the only one concerned.

"There's ammo in their pockets." He stammered, stuttering through the words. The man's eyes were both distant and wild at the same time. Like he was experiencing the worst thing imaginable, but his mind wasn't fully present either. "They ran out of ammo. I need to get it. Quickly." He said, his voice growing louder and more frantic. You turned back to look at Yong-sik and he nodded. The two of you sprang to action, alongside his mother and Jun-hee (as much as she could help.)

You laid out your jacket, and you all set the magazines on top of it. It would let him carry it out without the risk of dropping them. Yong-sik folded up the fabric and handed it to Dae-ho. "I think this is all of it." He said. Dae-ho stuttered out a thank you before grabbing the stockpile and walking out toward the hall.

You resumed pacing without even thinking about it. Eventually, you winced and looked down to realize you had pulled a hangnail and made your finger bleed. You looked to see Dae-ho running back into the room with his hands clamped over his ears. His eyes looked far away.

"Dae-ho, what happened?" Yong-sik asked. He didn't even acknowledge the man spoke. He just went to go sit on a bed. You met Yong-sik's eyes before taking a deep breath. You were terrified. You couldn't deny that. But if it meant sparing Dae-ho from that traumatic experience, you would do it for him. You started walking toward the door saying, "I'll go. I'll go run it out to th-"

"No! Please don't! You can't, please!" Dae-ho called out, panicking at the thought of you putting yourself in danger. His breathing quickened, gripping his hair tightly with his fingers.

You turned on your heel, taking in a sharp inhale. You couldn't do that to him. You would never forgive yourself if you didn't make it back. He didn't deserve that. He didn't deserve to lose another important person in his life. You walked to him without hesitation.

He sat against the wall, knees pressed against his chest. His hands were clamped over his ears, rocking back and forth slightly.

You stood at the foot of the bed. "Dae-ho?" You called out, not wanting to scare him. His frightened eyes looked up at you. "Can I sit?" You asked. He didn't respond for a few seconds, but he eventually gave a small nod.

You sat on the foot of the bed near him. His breathing was still fast and shallow. You tested the waters by lightly brushing your arm against his shin. He didn't react to that. You decided to try the techniques that worked to calm you during a panic attack. You had been so used to Dae-ho being your rock during your times of anxiety that this was unfamiliar territory for you.

You started by lightly tapping on the top of his shoe at an even pace. You knew that having some rhythmic stimuli could be grounding during your panic attacks. You soon transitioned it to gently running your hand up and down his shin. You synced that motion to your own breathing, trying to model deep breaths for him to follow.

The only time you said anything was when the echoes of the gunfire carried into the room. Anytime it happened, he would start breathing faster and tensing up. He pushed his hands over his ears hard enough that you thought it was probably hurting him. When this would happen, you would move your hand to his shoulder. "Hey. It's okay. You're safe, okay? I'm right here with you," You murmured, soft eyes meeting his wide ones.

After a few moments, he would relax slightly, and you would resume the motion you were doing before. You found that in the longer stretches of silence in between the gunfire, he would start to shakily match your breathing, but any progress made would be erased once he heard it again.

This happened a few times before you saw Hyun-ju run back into the room. "Dae-ho?" She called out, not sure if he was in the room. Yong-sik and his mother pointed in the direction of the two of you. She looked in disbelief at him before marching over there.

You gave her a pleading look, shaking your head. You understood she was probably angry for him abandoning the mission without a word, but this wasn't the right time to do this. She came over, reaching her hand to grab onto the bedframe above the bed you were on.

Dae-ho flinched back violently at her movement. You felt your heart drop at the sight. Did he... did he assume she was gonna hit him? You tried not to start crying at the ramifications of that action. He had to have had something like that happen to him in the past. How could anyone do that to him? You couldn't fathom it. Life can be so cruel sometimes. No one deserves that.

"Dae-ho. What happened?" She demanded, her voice stern. You wanted to ask her to leave, tell her to lay off for a second. But you knew she wouldn't leave because her anger was justified in the moment. How many people died because of the ammo running out? But how could she blame him for this? He was clearly going through hell right now both in reality and in his mind.

He started hyperventilating, muttering out repeated apologies without looking her in the eye. She looked taken aback by his reaction. You looked up at her and shook your head. "Not now. Please." You said softly. Her gaze softened before she turned and walked away.

You weren't expecting all hell to break loose in a matter of moments. The large rolling door in the front of the room slammed open. Pink soldiers rushing into the room, one shooting into the air. Dae-ho cried out, starting to tremble violently. "Dae, it's okay. It's okay, I promise." You said, but your voice betrayed you as it shook from your own nerves.

"Everyone! On your stomachs, now!" A guard with a square mask ordered. You looked back at him. "Hey, can you do that for me? Lay down on your stomach, okay?" You asked, trying to keep your voice calm. He didn't react. You grimaced. "Dae, I need you to get on your stomach right now, okay? Please, it's really important. Just for a minute, okay?" you begged, willing your tears to not drop from your eyes.

The triangle guards quickly approached the players. All were on the floor except the two of you. You watched as they searched the others, confiscating the guns from behind Hyun-ju's cover.

One guard walked up to the two of you. "On your stomach. Now." He demanded. You looked up at the triangle. "Please, sir. He's not in his right mind. He doesn't have anything, just let h-" You pleaded, being interrupted by him pointing the gun at you, finger ready on the trigger. You instinctively raised your hands, sliding off the bed and onto the floor.

You finally broke and started crying when you didn't hear Dae-ho move. "Dae, please." You cried out. The guard motioned for another to join him. Luckily, you didn't have to see it, but the two of them forced him to get on his stomach to pat him down. Hearing it was probably worse. He was crying, as well as wailing apologies and begging for his and your safety. It was too hard for you to listen to.

Just as quickly as they stormed the room to take control of it, they took all of the guns and ammo and left the room. No one knew what was going to happen, but you knew what you were going to do. You got up and started to lay on the bed next to him. He instantly understood what you were trying to do. He moved to bury his face into the side of your neck, arm draped across your waist.

In any other situation, you would be a blushing mess in this position, but you didn't have the time to overthink this. You two were close, but you didn't think you had been this close before to justify this intimate gesture. But you both just went through a lot together. The last 20 minutes had felt like you had just spent years with each other.

One of your hands found its way into his hair, gently running your fingers through it. Your other hand rubbed up and down his arm, once again matching the rhythm to your deep breathing. You continued to whisper to him softly, hoping it did something to calm him down. "Dae, it's okay. You're safe. Try to match my breathing if you can."

The doors rolled open again, but this time, he didn't jump to look at the noise. You took that as a sign that he was starting to relax. You looked over to see what was going on, just to see the forklifts carrying the black wooden coffins. You hated them. Putting the red bows on it felt like one final slap in the face. The soldiers began going to the bodies and scanning the chips in their ear. Player elimination announcements started over the PA system. You also noticed they were scanning the guards' masks, but there was no announcement. Maybe the guards weren't treated so differently than the players.

You rested your chin on the top of his head. You hoped it would stop him from turning to look. He didn't need to see that right now.

While listening to the announcements intently, you realized that the players who left to fight were also being scanned. You heard an announcement for Player 246, who you knew went out with the others. That put you on edge, but you tried not to physically react so as not to alert Dae-ho.

However, he was also listening closely to the announcements. He may not have seemed like it, but he was hanging on the robotic voice's every word.

You both were dreading hearing a specific number. You mentally pleaded with whatever higher power out there to not hear the three words that would break him even more than he was.

But life can be so cruel.

"Player 390, eliminated."

Dae-ho let out a strangled sob, starting to cry and tremble in your arms. You started crying as well, but you tried not to let him know that. You were crying for two reasons. Jung-bae was a close friend here, but you were mostly crying because of Dae-ho. Your empathy was overwhelming you. This isn't fair. Why does he have to go through this? He doesn't deserve it. Your best friend was going through hell right now, and you were so mad at the universe for subjecting him to this.

Soon after, you heard an announcement for Young-il, but you think Dae-ho was too absorbed with his grief to hear it.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. It's all my fault. It's my fault, I'm sorry." He started repeating. He was having trouble getting the words out through his tears.

"Hey, hey. It's not your fault, okay? None of this is your fault." You said back. You wished you could make him believe that, but you knew that would be a fruitless endeavor. This situation wasn't one you could just get over easily. This was likely something that would haunt him for the rest of his life. And you vowed that you would be there to help him through it whenever he needed you.

You didn't know how long you stayed like this. It had to have been hours. Eventually, he calmed down enough that he wasn't constantly trembling, but he didn't move from that position. At some point, you heard him start to snore softly. You almost cried upon hearing it. You were just so happy that he felt safe enough with you that he trusted to watch over him.

And that you did. You tried to stay awake as long as you could. There was one time in the night when he started to tense up, mumbling something in his sleep. His breathing was quicker and more shallow. He was clearly having a nightmare. You started running your hand up and down his back, your other hand carding through his hair. You hushed him quietly. "It's okay, Dae. You're safe. Go back to sleep, okay?" You murmured. Eventually, he relaxed once again. You gave a slight smile at this. Against your will, you too drifted off to sleep soon after.

You woke up to the lights turning on with a bright intensity. Apparently, after the excitement of the evening before, no one felt like repeating the brawls that had become commonplace. You all knew that the gamemakers weren't messing around anymore. They were getting ready to start handing out breakfast.

You gently shook Dae-ho's shoulder. "Dae? It's time to get up, okay?" You said softly.

He slowly started to wake up. He pulled away rather abruptly when he noticed the position the two of you were in. His face was beet red, but he didn't say anything. He got out of the bed and stood up shakily. You followed him after, letting yourself take a large stretch and a yawn.

His gaze still seemed intense, but he was definitely calmer than he was the night before. You tried to gauge how he was feeling with small talk. "It looks like they are passing out breakfast." You said before looking up at him, asking, "What do you think it'll be?" He looked over at you, but he didn't say anything.

You didn't show any disappointment at his lack of response. You knew he probably wasn't feeling up to it, and that was totally fine. You didn't want to shame him for that. "Personally, I think they should give us that soboro bread. That was surprisingly good." You said. He gave a weak smile and nodded, something that brought a smile to your face.

"We should probably go get in line." You suggested. He looked at the group of players before back at you. "We could always wait and get in line once everyone gets their food." You offered. He didn't acknowledge your statement, so you assumed you would just wait.

Once a majority of the players went through the line, he held out his hand to you. You couldn't stop the blush rising to your face, but you smiled and grabbed his hand. You walked over with him, hand in hand.

When you walked back, you took a moment to scan the room for your allies left. Geum-ja and Yong-sik were talking with Jun-hee and Myung-gi like normal. Hyun-ju's gaze was intense and her body was tense. She noticed you staring at her and turned her gaze to give you a slight glare. You frowned and looked back to Dae-ho, glad he wasn't looking toward her. You sat down against the wall, tapping the spot next to you to beckon him to sit. He hesitantly slid down the wall.

You tried not to be distracted by how close you were, but every time your shoulders brushed against each other, you felt electricity flood your body. You opened the bag, mildly disappointed when you saw it was just a hard-boiled egg and a carton of milk. "Damn." You muttered under your breath.

Dae-ho hesitantly opened the bag, taking the food out and just staring at it for a moment. You wouldn't be surprised that he didn't have an appetite, but it was important for him to eat regardless. Before you could urge him to eat, he started to unwrap the egg. This brought a smile to your face. You ate your own food.

Dae-ho passed you his carton of milk. "For last night." He said, turning to look at you.

You shook your head. "How many times did you help calm me down? I was a wreck after Mingle. Call it even." You said before taking a sip of your own milk.

He pushed the carton toward you again. "Last night was different. It looks like you hardly slept." He said quietly.

You looked up at him, gently grabbing his wrist and pushing it away from you. "No. It's fine." You insisted, a light smirk on your face.

He relented. He gave a slight smile at your persistence before opening it and taking a drink of the milk.

After a few moments of silence, he looked over at you. "Thank you. For everything."

You looked up at him, eyebrows furrowed in a look of confusion. "That's what friends are for, right?" You said softly.

He took a tense breath. "I've never really had someone who would do that for me." He said, looking away with a light pink dusting on his cheeks.

Your breath hitched in your throat. You knew that he didn't have the best upbringing, so while you felt bad that he didn't have that support growing up, you felt some sense of honor that you were able to earn his trust. You smiled softly. "I'd do anything for you." You said.

He looked back at you with wide eyes. He nodded his head. He nudged your shoulder lightly. "You and me 'til the end, right?" He said quietly.

You grinned and nodded back. "I wouldn't have it any other way." You replied.

You both knew what you were agreeing to. You two were the last ones from the alliance formed before the six-legged race. You had his back, and he had yours. No matter what, you were both getting out of here together. You didn't say the words, but the love you two had for each other was evident.

You finished off your milk carton before yawning. You leaned your head on his shoulder. It gave him instant butterflies in his stomach.

"I think I know how we can settle our scores." He said.

You looked up at him. He had a mischievous glint in his eye, something that brought you some needed relief. "They are already settled, but continue." You said.

"Take a nap while we have the time. I'll watch out for you." He said.

You nodded. "You don't need to tell me twice." You said with a laugh.

You leaned against his shoulder with another yawn. You grabbed his hand and intertwined your fingers. You let your eyes close, and it wasn't long until he felt your breathing deepen.

He looked down at you with a smile. He pressed a kiss to the top of your head before leaning his head against yours. He absent-mindedly rubbed the back of your thumb with his own.

He still wasn't feeling one hundred percent yet, and there was a lot more he needed to work through for himself. But he would try to be his best for you. And he was sure he would fight tooth and nail to get you both out of here.

[resident-idiot-simp]

Distance is pain

(x)

Logan had always been used to being distant the X-Men never seemed to care maybe even appreciate the distance he kept from them. Sure there were a few exceptions but for the most part, people preferred to have him at a distance.

However, for the first time in his life, this was not the case anymore. Wade always wanted him near and within reach. It freaked Logan out, to be honest, and he wasn't sure how to deal with this. He kept trying to keep a distance between them because surely this was what Wade actually wanted.

He kept doing this and kept doing this every time Wade expressed a desire for him to be and stay close be that physically or emotionally. This didn't work if course because if Logan did this Wade would run off and push him away. Wade thought he wanted this but he didn't no one really did.

Or at least he thought that until Wade started backing off and reseeding into himself. He seemed...smaller... So unlike what Logan had gotten used to. It felt wrong oh so wrong. Wade stopped speaking to him as much and it was affecting Logan more than he thought it would. The whispers in the back of his head telling him how much of a monster he was were back.

It was horrible and he didn't know why. Or he didn't until one day when he had come back from walking Mary to the sight of Wade on the couch. He was picking at his skin and muttering to himself and if it wasn't for Logan's enhanced hearing he wouldn't have heard any of it.

"You fucking idiot of course he doesn't want to be around you why would anyone? You never shut up or leave people alone." A shaky inhale, "You have been shown again and again when you be yourself you run people off. You're too much you know you're too much and yet you don't stop." He took another shaky inhale and scrubbed his hands over his eyes.

"Fucking pathetic you get the most perfect man in the damn multiverse and you can't reign yourself in enough to not run him off. He keeps pulling away and you can't accept it even though this is the same damn thing that happens every fucking time you try and get close to anyone." A wet inhale this time and Logan's heart fucking sinks.

He hadn't meant for this to happen he hadn't wanted to hurt Wade, hell he was pulling away so he wouldn't run Wade off. Fuck both of them apparently because they both wanted the exact same thing and were going about it opposite ways.

"Wade." Logan said softly and Wade fucking jumped eyes going wide as he desperately tried to downplay what Logan had just seen. "h-hey peanut I didn't realize you would be back so soon." Wade said as he jumped up off the couch and started backing away. Logan hated himself fervently for causing this for causing any pain to this man.

"Wade fuck I'm sorry I had no idea." Logan tried to apologize but Wade was shaking his head, "No no apologies peanut it's me it's...always me. I run everyone off every time." The last part is choked out and Logan can't allow that. Wade doesn't have a chance to run off before Logan grabs him and crushes the bigger man to his chest.

Wade freezes and starts to try to scramble away before stopping as he begins to shake lightly. "Wade I didn't mean to make you feel like I didn't care or was trying to get you to leave me alone." Logan spoke seriously. Wade sagged into him and buried his face in the older man's neck.

"Wade my whole life people have preferred me at a distance I thought I was doing you a favor by staying away." Logan continued as he held the other man tighter. "I didn't want to run you off by getting too close. Wade we have had opposite experiences and and were acting according to prevent the same outcome we always end up with."

Wade was hugging him back and holding him just as tightly now. "Why would anyone want to push you away? You're perfect." Wade asked and Logan shook his head lightly, "Why would anyone not want you close? You're amazing." Logan shot back.

Wade blinked tears out of his eyes as he pulled back to make eye contact with Logan. "Promise you won't push me away again?" Wade asked voice shakey and unsure. "As long as you promise not to leave me alone." Logan agreed.

It was the easiest compromise either man had ever made.

[cator99]

top 10 long-term psychiatric lockdown facility patients:

#1. "DJ B-Rad": severely hyperactive autistic 11 year old. Looked and acted like some sort of elf. Would only respond to DJ B-Rad. Spoke and conversed pretty much exclusively in outbursts of classic youtube poop quotes. The other kids thought he was schizophrenic but I understood him and appreciated the humor he brought to what was often a quite dour situation. The place held I think 30 kids at a time– 10 per wing, divided by the risk-level associated with their interactions/how much care they needed. I was in the "low risk" section... in a room beside DJ B-Rad. He would frequently beatbox while partaking in the enjoyment of punching or hitting himself. Not in a depressive or self-haming way, nor in a "the voices made me do it" way. He just seemed to genuinely enjoy it. #1 because I have never met someone with such jouissance before or since. (and also because I wanted to start this off on a high note.)

#2. really charismatic stylish fat girl, maybe 15 or 16, who told everyone she was autistic. all professionals dissuaded her from mentioning it since that didn't seem to be her problem and really she didn't seem to have any beyond claiming to be autistic for no appparent reason. It became clear very quickly that she was self diagnosed and had her autism refuted by every professional she had come across. Regardless– she didn't seem to know why she was there either. She genuinely came across as normal, confident, well-adjusted, healthy family life, so why was she there? I had a bit of a crush on her and she had lesbian moms so i kept my fingers crossed that she would self diagnose herself as some flavor of kweer. I didn't think too hard about it back then because in all honesty I hadnt the faintest idea of what autistic even meant and no one seemed able to give me a straight answer. In hindsight... my conspiracy theory is that her moms initially took her to a psychologist because she kept telling people she was super autistic and back then that sort of claim carried massive weight (non zero chance tumblr played a part in her autism proclamation, but she was way ahead of the curve seeing as this was like... early 2012. in canada. I wasnt really online back then so idk when this sort of thing started to pick up steam but judging by how 2013 unfolded im gonna guess that it was right about then...) so maybe they thought she was like having some sort of very pressing identity issues or psychosis maybe muchausen and decided to ship her off without delay... A genuinely normal girl adamant on having a disability that was considered (especially back then. especially after DJ B-Rad.) debilitating must have seemed so insane..... until suddenly it wasn't lol (even normies I know nowadays say things like "everyone is a little autistic") . She arrived a few weeks before my graduation and at that point almost all of the people I spent my time with were gone and the place was full of randos who I otherwise didn't gaf about which meant I was able to spend more time getting to get to know her, trying to understand why she was there and what autism meant. Unfortunately, her timing could not have been worse. No one had time to entertain her autism claims. She had arrived almost immediately after the grand spergfest that was DJ B-Rad's graduation dinner. the bar was high. If you were gonna be calling yourself autistic, you were gonna have to prove it. She didn't seem at all bothered, nor deterred, nor invalidated by the professionals refusing to entertain the idea of her being even slightly on the spectrum... she was certain they were just ableist. During group therapy, when trying to get to the bottom of things, the "why" of her stay here, what issues she may have been dealing with, anything really... There didn't seem to be an answer. She most often took on a supportive role for others that came across as slightly tone deaf because she was trying to tell trauma patients to just keep their chin up and stay positive... which on paper could be possibly bad faith interpreted as "socially autistic" but no it more so came across as out of touch, as one of the rare patients who didnt have a background involving trauma, poverty, neglect, mental illness, etc. But to be honest, most people seemed to appreciate just having a truly unbothered, kind, and optimistic peer around– her intentions were, at the very least, pure. And for someone with low-level munchhausen, it didn't seem as though she was doing it for attention, nor did she fake any symptoms, or do anything really beyond say "i am autistic" and continue on with her day which I'm sure was extra confusing for the professionals dealing with her to wrap their heads around at the time.

#3. The Escape Artist: 14, caring and emotionally intelligent when she let her guard down, but typically quite guarded. Screwed up from her life on the rez. Always kept it real– I had some of my best discussions about life in general with her. By the time I got there, she had taken on a sort of mythical status as the unapproachable girl who had almost escaped the facility, and as a result had her stay extended "indefinitely". The minimum (and typical) stay was 4 months... by the time I arrived, she had been there for over 6 months, and she was still there when I "graduated" 4 months later. The story was that not long into her stay, she was being led back inside with the rest of the herd following a highly-supervised game of soccer in the fenced-off field attached to the back of the facility. To get outside at any time, you have to go through two (or 3) sets of locked doors. Beyond that... I mean, this place is in the middle of nowhere. This isn't some city psych ward shit. But security wasn't as tight as the staff let on. She had been plotting and waiting for a chance to escape for weeks– it was almost all she thought about. As the crowd was ushered along, distractions and misbehaving children were plentiful. While the staff were suddenly very wrapped up in dealing with whatever pressing issue had begun occurring, she realized that the door behind them had not closed properly. She somehow slipped out unseen, and managed to get a 10 minute head start before they realized she had vanished. She had run out the back, climbed the fence, hurt herself in doing so, but booked it down the highway regardless. She was in the middle of attempting to board a bus at one of its very few stops between this nowhere-place and the nearby city, when suddenly she was tackled down by staff who had been frantically driving around looking for her. Every kid there joked about plotting their escape– so of course she was a legend for having gotten that far. However, her response was always to roll her eyes at anyone who even joked about it: "Dont be stupid. Just do your 4 months. It passes like nothing." While she tended to be withdrawn from other patients, she had close relationships with all the staff there- including the ones who caught her- and often admitted that she wasn't sure anymore what she would do if they told her that it was her turn to graduate. Her entire support system was there. She didn't want to leave. At some point the program director decided she was making good progress and tried to push her on the path of the family reintigration stage. First time she went out for a brief day-pass type visit with her family, she stabbed herself in the stomach. Spent some time in an actual hospital. Upon her return, she played it cool and acted like it was no big deal, even tried to warp it into a badass thing while she showed us her stitches. But we all knew it was fucked up and that the next group therapy everyone was gonna have to sit back and give her the front and center even though she wanted to brush it off. She otherwise did seem happy to be back, even as she was placed back on "indefinitely stay" status. She was one of few I kept in touch with... which became very difficult very fast as she proceeded to dissappear for months and then years at a time, with the only indications of what's going on being people posting to her fb page asking if she's out of jail yet.

#4. Future Millenial Cringe Tiktok Star: 17, Baddie of the low-risk wing. She always had the most useful insight to offer during group-therapy (split by sex– sorry4tangent but of course as a fresh ftm I asked to get put into the "boys" group– was talked out of it by a staff member who assured me that it was an absolute shitshow in there and that yeah I could go down that road and maybe succeed but I would 100% regret it. I talked to some of the guys who told me it was just 2 hours of total retardation and anger outbursts often leading to physical fights and restraint-room utilization, all to the soundtrack of DJ B-Rad yelling "Pizza Time!" "PINGAS" "You Must Die" "Sos" etc. lol)... I always admired her maturity, level-headedness, and ability to tell off the dipshit dudes there in such a way that the staff had her back, and I often asked her how tf to handle this shit while maintaining my sanity. She was certain that you don't, but that's alright– comes with the territory– and if your sanity is reliant on being kept in here then you're not going to know how to cope on the ouside– she frequently said that hating it there and wanting to leave was a good thing (as you could imagine, her and Escapee had a strained relationship, and while Escapee would directly bring these things up with her, she saw the topic as dead on arrival since she was there solely for herself and knew it, and kept form boundaries between herself and other patients, which isnt to say she didnt engage with others but I could tell she was... I guess just way more self aware than the rest of us, likely due to her being the oldest one there), but sometimes people challenged this idea by positing that she was just saying that to justify her negativity, since it "wasn't that bad" there. She assured them that it wasn't normal to be locked up in a psychiatric facility, and that not treating it like a vacation wasn't a failure on her part– she was there putting in hard work to sort her shit out, and thought that it was a waste to just sit around waiting for it to be over. Oh also staff low-key knew she had snuck a phone onto the wing but didn't care really, because she was a model patient (phone was snuck in during her "family reintigration" period nearing the end of her stay, where the program gives patient families the opportunity to visit and go out for the day– and more rarely but sometimes even overnight, depending on the patient. All of this was pretty rare tho because kids often came from idgaf-families)... not much else to say except she was dope and it's weird seeing her getting dunked on online for calling herself clumsy in a tiktok. She once ran for some political position while also being open about the fact that she was a stripper. She almost got voted in too (small town politics moment)I honestly wish she had because she has always seemed very intelligent and driven...

[atangledfate]

It was no surprise to dawn that Twist struggled to understand a gift of gaia. It wasn't really something most mobians thought about at least not the why. most just accepted that some of them were born special, and gifted. To some it was being touched by light gaia and to others it was thought to be a curse of Dark Gaia. Still many more informed thought was simple mutation but, the truth was no body really knew. Mobians were just born gifted, or curse and had to live with there abilities. Dawn never believed for a second it was worth thinking to deeply on.

" hah! no problem, honestly i wish i knew the real reason but ya know my ma' use to say--- some mysteries in life are meant to stay a mystery. Now go clean your room! "

Her duplicate smiled as she lead twist down the hall to the triage wing where many of the worse injuries were being kept. Lots of duplicates rushed around with carts and first aid kits trying to care for many patients.

" Yea, Capitalism is always a drag... But i bet there is some program to help out. Well anyway it was just a thought..."

Her ear twitched at the mention of watching someone lose an arm and being fine. She had to endure such wounds during the war, and while her duplicates tended to disappear when suffered major injury. She still had vivid memories of getting sliced up, crushed, or maimed during the war. It didn't leave a mark on the real dawn but the mental trauma of enduring was everlasting mark on her psyche.

" Here we are... come on let's get these folks patched up... and ready for transfer to GUN's facility. Least the ones we can move! "

=============================================

In truth Jewel didn't know much about Yara's family but they did have a well known reputation concerning thieves. Made her wonder if that's how he lost his tail, or if he was born that way. She just hoped the prince would treat them well and not be to hard on them. She made a mental note to check up on them later. though Surge's report did seem to worry her to no end. Why was GUN being so cruel? she'd always had goo report with Mr. Tower, and now this?

" I See... that's still concerning. Thank you Surge for the update. Also thank you again Highness... your talents are still most welcome. But i did mean what i said. I expect you to treat the boys well... i'll be checking on them to insure they aren't mistreated in the days ahead...everyone deserves a chance at redemption after all."

She turned to Surge and buzzed up to eye level as she felt it helped her seem more commanding.

" Surge i need you to get me back to command as soon as possible. I can't help but feel my place is in the command center with the others. With things feeling a bit dire... i need to try and contact General Tower and see what is actually going on... i can't believe he'd authorize a move like this..."

"Can't say I even understand Gaia Gifts even having it explained to me, though that's the best way anyone's explained it to me." Twist supposed all the doctors explain it in a lot of detail instead of just giving a simple and easy answer. The lemur supposed the gifts were just so complex most figured a more detail explanation was helpful, though it just made him have more questions.

"Thought bout it, though I don't got that kind of cash and insurance won't cover something like that." Twist and his family lived rather comfortable, though cybernetics were expense. Though now it made him wonder what his G.U.N contacts could do. Maybe he could even return to service as he wasn't that old. Something he'd worry about later as there were more pressing matters.

"I've see a solider lose their arm right in front of me and didn't so much as flinch. I'm sure I can handle whatever injures are here." Twist had seen some major injuries during his service so not much could shake him. The lemur would simply start to follow one of the copies of the nurse. He might have to shake of some of the rust to remember everything, though it shouldn't take long.

===========================================================

"I know my parents don't have the best reputation, though I can assure you I am nothing like them." Yara's parents weren't cruel, though they have always been seen as rather ruthless with their rule as punishments for crimes were often swift and at times harsh. Makes for a secure kingdom, though also a tense one when it comes to the people that live in it. "My talent isn't in healing, though I can revert the damage enough to where you basically got a small bump on your head." His main skills were in his Illusion Mist.

"We'll still be careful not to get on your bad side. Last thing we need is to be on your families bad side again." Rough was surprised they managed to make it out of Midesta the first time and doubt they'd get lucky again. Though Yara was always has a softer approach then his parents. The skunk was glad to hear they let him take charge of running things.

"It ain't that bad, just G.U.N being a bunch of dicks and wanting you lot to close up shop so they can poke their nose around. Guess they knew about Clutch and Mimic here, yet didn't want to share that information with you guys." Surge supposed she should be glad as she was sure they'd throw her and Kit under the bus as well.

"I suppose I should contact my representative in G.U.N to inform them about my punishment for Rough and Tumble. They may not be completely pleased, though my family has always held a good relation with them so I doubt they'll put up much of a fuss about it." Yara supposed it helped the two skunk brothers were rather small time criminals.

[luanna801]

Despite me joking about Lan Xichen not reading the room re: NMJ and JGY, I actually disagree with the idea that the Sworn Brotherhood was inherently a terrible idea and he should have known it would make things worse. I think it's a classic case where because we as the audience know how it turns out, that outcome seems like an inevitability and the characters end up being called dumb for not predicting it. But I think with the information Lan Xichen had at the time, it wasn't unreasonable for him to think this might work and was at least worth trying.

And I think in a different story, this is the kind of idea that could easily have worked and led to a heartwarming story about redemption and healed relationships. MDZS is just sadly not that story, at least for these characters, but as always fictional characters don't know what story they're living in and can't be expected to predict the future. All they can do is act based on the information available to them, and I would argue Lan Xichen didn't really have enough information to predict how this would turn out:

(1) At this point, the only time Nie Mingjue has tried to kill Jin Guangyao is when he mistakenly thought JGY had actually betrayed them and defected to the Wen side. Once the truth was cleared up, NMJ is still furious but backs down from trying to kill him. (JGY, meanwhile, has made no attempts to kill or even harm NMJ yet, and in fact actually saved his life.)

From Lan Xichen's perspective, he has every reason to think this incident was just an anomaly based on a very extreme situation where NMJ was acting on faulty information. He has no reason to think Nie Mingjue would try to kill Jin Guangyao again, or vice versa, so as far as he knows the worst case scenario for the sworn brotherhood is just... that it won't go great. That maybe they'll never really get along again, but they'll still collaborate politically for the sake of the Sworn Brotherhood, and there will be no real harm done that they tried. There isn't really a way he could have predicted things would escalate to them trying to kill each other.

(2) Nie Mingjue and Jin Guangyao used to not just tolerate each other but get along/work together EXCEPTIONALLY well, and Lan Xichen saw them during that time. He also knows they're both pretty closed-off people who canonically don't have a lot of friends and are hurt by the way things fell apart. It makes total sense for him to think they might be able to get back to how things used to be if they just got a chance to clear up misunderstandings and be reminded of the things they used to like about each other. And it makes sense that as someone who cares about them both he would want that for them.

(3) Lan Xichen sees both Nie Mingjue and Jin Guangyao as fundamentally good people. We can argue that he's mistaken in one or both of those evaluations, but based on what he knows, and indeed what they're respectively actually guilty of at that time, I don't think it's unreasonable for him to think so.

Most of JGY's worst actions are still in the future at this point. His only real crime (other than the things he did undercover, which LXC doesn't condemn) is killing the captain, which is an ambiguous enough situation that it makes sense for Lan Xichen to not consider it conclusive. Especially when weighed against what for LXC is far more substantial proof of JGY's goodness, like JGY having saved his own life when he was on the run, his time loyally and effectively serving NMJ, his incredibly brave and critical contributions to the war effort, etc.

Likewise, Nie Mingjue has yet to start acting as violent and unhinged as he later will on account of the saber spirit. While he's gotten angry, it was typically in rational ways that are largely proportional to the situation. He isn't doing anything comparable to the way he later flies off the handle at both Jin Guangyao and Nie Huaisang in largely irrational ways.

(We could argue that LXC should have known that he'd eventually end up there because of how saber cultivation works, but considering even Nie Huaisang apparently didn't know about it, I don't know that a member of another clan would have that kind of in-depth knowledge of the effects of Nie saber-wielding. LXC presumably knows the basic idea, but that doesn't necessarily mean he knows the specifics or how bad it can get.)

Therefore, from LXC's perspective these are two fundamentally kind, good people who all other things being equal should be able to work things out. And on the whole, he has far more evidence backing that up than contradicting it at this point in time.