#and he was hanging out with avery and mulciber before that. as well as getting into fights with the marauders

[seriousbrat]

personally I find it unlikely that sev was a prefect. first of all if he'd had a badge I think it would've been brought up somehow in SWM (unlike Lily whom Harry barely paid attention to) and I also just don't think he would have been chosen. I doubt Slughorn would have chosen him if he had any say in the matter and I don't think Dumbledore would have either

[dearestdo3]

Hcs for slytherin!james?

He was devastated at first since he's a proud descendant of the great Godric Gryffindor, and now he's their family's only Slytherin

^ but he'd settle in nicely in the snake's den after he busied himself with Quidditch and gained lots of friends and fame

He saw with his own eyes how not all Slytherins are evil like he thought of before. There's actually non-purebloods, as well as decent, nice purebloods in this house!

^ And he experienced first hand how unfairly judged Slytherins are by the rest of Hogwarts, especially Gryffindors

^ Opened up his eyes to a more nuanced perspective, and he became much less judgmental and one-sided than canon Gryff!James

On one hand, I want Sirius to also be in Slytherin, but on the other hand, Sirius Black becoming a Gryffindor and James Potter a Slytherin is absolutely hilarious

^ The duo of all time. Ended house rivalry. They hang out with each other more than they do with their own housemates.

^ Marauders never gets established, therefore no animagi. It's only Sirius and James.

He's one of the most popular Slytherins; he's from a respectable pureblood family, he's good looking, rich, smart, and their Quidditch team's star Chaser

Slughorn adores him. He believes he's ol' Sluggy's favorite snake eventhough he's not that invested in potions

James made sure to stay away from the people he suspected as DE supporters/recruits, and try to convince his fellow Slytherins to do the same

^ This earned him quite a mixed reputation among the Slytherins (and Gryffindors)

Still does his 'pranks' alongside Sirius, but a bit smarter about it and they managed to avoid detention most of the time

Goes into fights a lot with Mulciber and Avery since he still insists on refusing to have anything to do with Dark Arts

^ The two call him a hypocrite for his 'pranks' and mock him for being a blood traitor

Speaking of the duo, he shares a dorm room with Mulciber, Avery, Rosier, and Snape! (RIP)

He would either be besties with Regulus, or they'd absolutely despise each other (it has everything to do with Sirius) (and Quidditch) (and Pureblood politics)

And the rest of these are more jeverus-adjacent, but could be read as platonic too :3c

THE classmate who laughed the loudest and teased the longest when Sev was struggling to mount a broom during their first flying lesson

He'd have a secret admiration (and jealousy) of Sev since he sees firsthand how Sev is so dedicated (and weirdly enthusiastic) to his potions research, his studies, and even cheering on the Slytherin Quidditch team

^ (Sev literally just sometimes watches their practices and games but James counts it as a huge, insanely ooc gesture lmao)

^ He also saw firsthand the bullying and shaming of Sev's blood status from their housemates

^ He might be hostile towards Sev, but his heroism and 'I can fix him' mentality wins

Despite their early tension, both James and Sev managed to warm up to each other and settle their differences after one too many confrontations with the other three dormmates

James would drop comments on how Sev needs to stop burying his nose in books and enjoy the sun (like watching their team's practices and games, wink wink)

Made sure that Sev isn't going to be swayed by the DE lot since he knows how crafty and smart Sev is, and how dangerous the other side could be if they have him; so he made extra effort to befriend Sev and pull him towards the 'light' side

After hearing about Sev's family situation (through Sev himself or via Lily), he stopped mocking his looks and started to gift him stuff every Xmas

^ He'd also softly tell Sirius to leave Sev alone (making up excuses of course so that Sirius wouldn't feel like James is warming up to the dungeon bat)

He still struggles a lot to not be overly sarcastic or mean when he talks to Sev (it's just so hard to when he's Snape) but he makes a conscious effort to be nice and patient towards him

Sev would tutor him in Potions, while he tutors Sev in Transfiguration

^ They would make bets and challenge each other to see which one of them would get more house points

^ This, in turn, made the Slytherins more friendly and accepting towards Sev (because he racks up those pts like his life depended on them, like hell he'd lose to James Potter)

He'd actually open his mind to Dark Arts after years of knowing and befriending Sev, and see that having knowledge in it would bring benefits that people often overlook

^ He would ask tons of questions to Sev (which Sev would begrudgingly and happily oblige)

He feels kinda proud that he gains Sev's friendship, like he'd just befriended a Bearded Dragon; it's something special and not a lot of people get this close to the prickly git

Lily would get jealous that her best friend is being pulled away by the arrogant toerag LOL

[knight-already]

Why do we think Severus had no friends other than Lily?

Please tell me... before anyone says he was friends with Mulciber and Avery. That was a recent affair which we learn because lily tells Severus, "I don't like the people you've been hanging out with."

It's recent.

We know, also that the werewolf attack also happens before SWM -- and we learn this particularly in the same conversation.

Did Severus join their friend group out of fear?

I know this has nothing to do with my og point, that being : is any Slytherin a good enough friend, for Severus and is Severus a Slytherin good enough to be friends with any other house?

But wait a second;

Severus has always been an out cast, he's at the bottom of school's social ladder; he's poor, not mainstream attractive, he has poor socialization.

He hardly managed to make friends with Lily only succeeding because he had something she wanted; Knowledge about the wizarding world.

Therefore when he joined Mulciber's group; he would have had to been at the bottom of the friend group, as a : go for/ yes man/ nerd that does their homework ect....in exchange for being in the group and possibly getting protection; IF they bothered too, which I doubt they did seeing as no one in that group came guns a blazing to help him in SWM.

That friend group's power wasn't balanced, and if you've never been in a friend group that wasn't balanced then bless you.

When we talk about balance for the peoples that may not understand:

We have our leader: who may or may not be the glue of the group ei, the one who gathered the friends, or they could also just be the loudest, pushiest or just idk has more swag.

Example: James.

Then we have the second in command, the best friends of the leader, these people are the closest -- best friends, possibly has the ability to kind of influence the leader:

Example: Sirius

Then we have the third, close to the outside eye, best friends with the first two but everyone inside knows they aren't as close, if they were walking and one had to fall behind it would be this friend, if they ever stopped talking for a little, this friend would be first to go.

Example: Remus

And lastly we have the bottom of their social ladder, this friend is a follower, not a lot of say in the group, is lucky to be there and to be considered a friend, usually a yes man, a go for, or someone they exploit for their own personal gain, ie studying or help with assignments, or they could have poor social skills but have a rich background and is easy to manipulate. They are in this group for more protection or power of numbers. They need the group more than the group needs them.

Example: Peter & Severus

Originally I made this post to ponder any friends Severus might have had -- but in a environment that already is hostile to Slytherins, would any Slytherin on the same social standing had been his friend?

I mean he already pissed off the biggest bullies in their year so anyone on a similar social standing might not want to be friends with him out of fear of being more on James and co. raider than they already are, plus this is especially true for maybe another Slytherin -- (Slytherins stick together because of their bad rep. Professor's are no help usually.)

Any other Slytherin would be above him, and most likely not spare him the time of day.

Why would other houses help the weird kid with a huge target on his back?

And if magically he made friends, perfectly find friends who don't let Potter's bullying fly or any house's bulling fly and fight back. If they did manage to be Severus' friends, would Lily approve?

I mean, how do we know someone is a threat?

Don't we either learn through the grape vine or our own eyes?

Well, other houses are side eyeing Slytherin, for being death eaters -- so the muggleborns are sticking close together. Maybe even the houses are protecting their muggleborn friends in whatever way:

"Hey this one's family is a death eater..."

"That one's relative is a supporter..."

"Stay away from them."

I mean we know James and co are on the lights side, so obviously, their actions and pranks are cool because they would never stoop to such a disgusting level.

Does that translate to :

If James and co. Don't approve of this person and are acting out against them ----

They are fight the good fight?

I mean, we do know Mulciber and Avery do become deatheaters.

But -- we don't hear anything about James and co fighting them. We hear Lily being weary of them.

is any Slytherin a good enough friend, for Severus and is Severus a Slytherin good enough to be friends with any other house?

Unimportant to the post:

Looking at Harry 's own friend group with Ron and Hermione. I meant to talk about a balance in friend groups, but I just realized you might think Harry is the leader, which is was at a point since Ron and Hermione didn't get along at the start.

But in truth Ron is the glue, while Harry has the leader status.

That's all, this post is long enough.

[3473-warrior]

Escaping the Dark Lord

Wolfstar and Sunseeker | words: 1,818

"How are you?"

"Oh, you know, as best as can be, I guess." Sirius pauses. "Fuck! James, I have to go. Someone's coming."

"Wait, Padfoot-"

"I'll see you soon, yeah?" Sirius hangs up the mirror and shoves it into his pocket before Walburga enters the room.

"Downstairs."

"I don't-"

"Now, Sirius! We have guests." Sirius gets out of bed and follows his mother downstairs. He abruptly stops when they enter the dining room. Bellatrix, Rodolphus, Rabastan, Mulciber, and Avery gather around the long table full of food. Along with Sirius' parents and brother and someone he doesn't know.

"Ah, Sirius. I'm so glad you could join us," the unknown person speaks, but his voice has a hiss-like undertone. He's tall with thick, chestnut hair and a sharp jawline, but that's where his similarities to any human end. His eyes are deep red with snake-like pupils. "I believe we have a lot to talk about."

"Who are you?" Sirius blurts before he can bite his tongue.

"You dare-" Bellatrix starts to spit, standing, but the unknown person settles her with a simple raised hand.

"It's alright, Bellatrix. I look a bit different than before, don't I, Sirius?" Sirius watches in awe as a glamor shimmers over the man, covering his eyes and making him look more human. "This is what I looked like when we first met if I'm not mistaken? Yes, I have changed my appearance some. Have a seat, please." The unknown man waves his hand, and the chair beside Regulus slides away from the table, putting Sirius between him and Orion. Sirius takes the seat with more apprehension than he wishes he displayed. The man lets the glamor drop, "You're an intriguing young man, Sirius. Weren't you born with an inclination for Dark magic?"

"I was." The man hums low in his throat and gazes at him.

"It seems you don't ally yourself with other people born like that."

"I don't see any need to. James Potter and Peter Pettigrew are brilliant wizards without the proclivity for darkness."

"But not Remus Lupin?"

"He leans more towards Grey."

"And why do you think that is?"

"Well, it would be the magic he's leant toward since birth."

"It isn't. You see, most werewolves are lucky if they lean towards Grey magic." Sirius choked on his bite of food.

"I don't have any idea-"

"I think you do. Remus Lupin is one of Greyback's, isn't he, Rodolphus?"

"Yes, my lord. He turned when he was four because the boy's father couldn't hold his tongue."

"Hmm, Sirius, I don't appreciate liars. Do you?"

"No, sir."

"But you lied to me."

"I-I did."

"Why?"

"Because I want to keep Remus safe." Sirius holds still under the sharp, red gaze.

"I have a favor to ask of you."

"What kind of favor?"

"The kind of favor that will put you in my good graces and keep all the people you care about safe, including those mudbloods."

"If you harm them-"

"I won't... if you do this one little thing."

"It's not that little if you're willing to let muggle-borns live. You're Voldemort."

"I prefer the Dark Lord, but yes, I am."

"What do you want from me?" Voldemort lifts his hand again and points to the people across from Sirius.

"This." They roll the sleeves on their left arms up.

Sirius pushes away from the table and speaks before he can think better, "I won't."

"Sirius!"

"I knew you would ask a lot of me being the heir, Mother, but this is low, even for you. I refuse."

"Oh, well. I suppose... I can always make Regulus do so." Regulus pales but tightens his grip on his silverware and doesn't let his resolve waver.

"No! That isn't happening."

"You can't make that decision for me, Sirius. You aren't my father."

"Oh, because our father did a great job of raising us?" Sirius spits. "Touch Reggie, and I'll blow your head off. Can't exactly run an army of Death Eaters if you don't have one, can you?" Voldemort sighs deeply.

"I was hoping I wouldn't have to do this. Mulciber, Avery, if you would?" He waves his arm at Sirius, and they stand with nasty grins.

"Oh, it would be our pleasure, my lord." Rodolphus and Rabastan circled the table quickly and pulled a confused Regulus out of his seat before forcing him to his knees and uncovering his forearm. Sirius doesn't have time to react before being forced to his knees by Mulciber and Avery.

"Don't touch him," Sirius snarls, struggling against their hold. Bellatrix cackles and shoots a spell at him.

"Crucio! Maybe that will shut you up, you little blood traitor." Sirius screams himself raw and tries to curl away from the pain, but Mulciber and Avery hold him tightly. The spell ends and leaves Sirius gasping in deep breaths.

"Now, Sirius, you can either take my mark, or Regulus will." Sirius glances at Regulus and steals his resolve. Regulus looks terrified by everything happening around him but doesn't seem to be doing anything. Barely able to look around the room, Sirius sees his parents standing in the corner. Of course, they wouldn't be doing anything in this situation but leaving it up to Sirius to get himself and Regulus out of this.

"Go to hell." He spits a mouthful of blood from biting his tongue at Voldemort's feet. "You can't have either of us."

"Is that right?" Voldemort turns and walks toward Regulus. He grasps his chin and looks into his eyes. "What do you think, Regulus? Will you take the mark?" Sirius can see Regulus starting to crumble under the pressure of that stare. He's about to speak up when another glamor covers Voldemort. Sirius sputters when a replica of James takes shape. "What about now, Regulus? Will you now?"

"I- James?" Sirius scrunches his face at the way Regulus says his best friend's name.

"Regulus, look at me." Regulus' attention wavers. "Regulus!" Sirius isn't afraid to be harsh with his brother right now, and Regulus' eyes snap over to him. "That isn't James. Would he let us get hurt if it was?"

"No," Regulus mumbles. Some of the fog starts to clear from his face.

"Love, I'm doing what's best for you and Sirius. Can't you see that?" Sirius makes a hurt noise when Regulus immediately looks back at Voldemort, and the fog reappears. How could Voldemort figure out their one weakness? And how does he sound and look exactly like James? "You'll join him eventually. Don't you think it'd be easier to just give up and give in?"

"I don't- James, I don't want to do this. I don't like this feeling." Shit! Sirius forgot that Regulus was a sub. Of course, he'd fold for someone looking like James when he's so confused and lost.

"I know, love, but it'll be better once you accept the mark. I promise."

"Regulus Arcturus!" Regulus wrenches to look at Sirius with a whimper. He can't not when Sirius sounds like that.

"I'm scared, Siri. What's going on?"

"James isn't here, baby. Do you think he'd make you do something you don't want to if he was?"

"No," Regulus whines and struggles against the hold on his face. "James wouldn't make me do that."

"You're right. I wouldn't." Sirius snaps his head to the door so quickly it sharps. He heaves a relieved sigh when he sees James standing in the doorway with a group of aurors behind him.

"James?"

"You always were horrible at hanging up that mirror, Pads." He smirks, "You can drop the glamor, Voldemort. It doesn't suit you." Voldemort wrenches away so quickly Regulus falls to the floor with a hurt whine. "Do you need any more proof than that, Auror Moody, or is this enough to arrest the lot of them?"

"This is more than enough, Mr. Potter. Men." Voldemort disapparates when the Aurors start flooding into the room. The others try to do the same, but Sirius wrenches out of their grips and causes them to lose focus. He crawls to Regulus and pulls him into his arms.

"Shh, you're okay. I've got you, Regulus. They can't hurt you. They're gone, baby. I promise." James drops heavily to the floor beside them and yanks them into his arms.

"Are you hurt?"

"I was crucioed, but I think Regulus is okay." James pulls back slightly and gazes at Regulus.

"Love, look at me. It's me. I'm right here." Regulus pulls out of Sirius' neck and looks warily at James. "Oh, angel." James reaches toward the bruises starting to rise on Regulus' face. He whimpers when Regulus shies away. "I'm not going to hurt you, love. It's me." Regulus nuzzles into James' palm. "I promise." Regulus throws himself into James' chest and inhales deeply.

"It's you. It really is." James' arm wraps around Regulus, and he holds Sirius' hand with the other.

"It's me, love. It's me." Regulus whimpers and breaks down in James' arms.

"Sirius?" Sirius turns away from James and finds Remus standing in the doorway.

"Go on. I've got Reg. Your sub needs you, Pads." Sirius drops a kiss on Regulus' head before going over to Remus.

"I'm okay, love. I'm alright." Remus whimpers and crumbles into Sirius. "Alright, alright. Shhhh, you're alright."

"They were hurting you. I could feel it." Sirius pulls back and grasps Remus' face between his hands.

"I'm okay. Moony, I'm fine." Sirius kisses him softly. "I promise. I'm alright."

"I was so scared when James called me."

"I know, love. I'm sorry I scared you."

"Don't do it again."

"I'll try." Remus accepts that with a nod and folds back into Sirius.

"You better." Sirius chuckles softly and bundles Remus into his arms.

"Lord and Lady Black, you're adding to the mess by resisting. It would go more quickly if you accept your arrest easily."

"Sirius, we did nothing wrong. What were we supposed to do? He said he would kill you and Regulus if we didn't agree." Sirius looks over at his mother.

"You knew what you were doing when you let them into your house. I won't play the stupid little heir anymore, and there is no way in hell that I'm letting you get Regulus instead." Sirius looks softly at Regulus, curled up in James' arms. He's not letting his little brother get hurt. "Auror Moody, take them away. I'm filing charges of abuse for myself and Regulus."

"Of course, Mr. Black." Sirius looks back at Remus as the free Aurors step toward his parents.

"Do you want to go to yours?"

"Can we go to James'?"

"'Course, love. James, is it okay if we go to yours?"

"My parents are expecting all of us. Pete's already there."

"Hang on, okay?" Remus nods against Sirius' chest, and they disappear with a pop. Sirius relaxed, knowing he wouldn't let anything hurt his sub or his brother.

[hollowed-theory-hall]

That theory in Riddle being sexually abused by a Doctor figure and the behaviours he depicted + the talk on unsympathetic victims... Kind of violently reminded me of Severus, and especially his Worst memory where the Marauders did what they did to him. Even his bond with Lily was this unhealthy dependency I think? Well not the right word. But Lily was the only thing keeping him sane and going I feel.

Anonymus: Adding on to the previous ask about Sev and Lily and unsympathetic victims. Do you think the Evans ever acted for Severus the way the weasleys did for Harry? A safe retreat? Do you think they ever tried to report Tobias? How do you interpret Sev and Lil's bond? I know a lot of the fandom thinks Sev was infatuated with her/ romantically loved her...but I often felt that Severus raised Lily to a holy Mary status, and that while he did in fact love her, it was platonic (in which case there is a comment to be made about the way platonic love between opp sex PPL is perceived and ridiculed)

I'm not the op of the post you mentioned, but yeah, Severus is a great example of an unsympathetic victim. Personally, he isn't a character I like all that much, but he is undeniably an interesting one. This turned out a little rambly, but that's what I got.

We don't know how SWM ended, but, yeah... not pleasant regardless of how far it went.

Severus was definitely a victim of abuse, both at his home and school and what he went through was awful. That victimhood doesn't excuse his treatment of students in his care. Like, I had a temporary position as an instructor for teenagers, and Severus' treatment of his students makes me want to throttle him a bit.

But as a child, as a teen — he definitely didn't deserve the life he got. Dumbledore has a tendency to turn a blind eye to abuse for various reasons, which ended up fucking a lot of people over, Snape included. (Tom and Hary too)

As for Severus' dependence on Lily, yeah, I think he was incredibly fixated on her. I agree with you that that fixation isn't necessarily romantic. Lily, was essentially Severus' first friend — his best friend. Lily was to Snape what Ron was to Harry in a way. The first person he felt he could trust.

I went through The Prince's Tale to refresh my memory on all of this, and I wanna talk about his friendship with Lily first, actually.

“. . . thought we were supposed to be friends?” Snape was saying, “Best friends?” “We are, Sev, but I don’t like some of the people you’re hanging round with! I’m sorry, but I detest Avery and Mulciber! Mulciber! What do you see in him, Sev, he’s creepy! D’you know what he tried to do to Mary MacDonald the other day?” Lily had reached a pillar and leaned against it, looking up into the thin, sallow face. “That was nothing,” said Snape. “It was a laugh, that’s all—” “It was Dark Magic, and if you think that’s funny—” “What about the stuff Potter and his mates get up to?” demanded Snape. His color rose again as he said it, unable, it seemed, to hold in his resentment.

(DH, 569)

Severus sees himself and Lily as best friends. He's happy when she dislikes James, but, he never makes any attempt to become romantic with her. It can be read either way, but personally, I like to read it as a close friendship.

(A little unrelated note about the above quote I saw someone mention once somewhere: Severus knows James fancies Lily, and warns her about it in that same conversation above, and It's interesting he raises Lily's potential romantic interest in James as a retort when she says she doesn't know what he sees in Mulciber. Is anyone shipping Mulciber/Severus? 👀)

I mentioned in this post how I believe Severus' Patronus is a doe because he sees Lily as his defender. Even after all these years. And I think, that too, can be about friendship. Because Liy was his first friend, his first defender. The fact that in SWM we see her step in to defend him suggests to me it happened before. That Lily stepped in to defend Severus, so when he calls for a guardian, in the form of a Patronus, it's still Lily.

And after SWM, Severus is less concerned about what happened to him, he's more concerned about losing Lily. That was the worst thing about that memory. Not his humiliation or assualt, but the loss of his first, and probably only best friend. I don't think he ever trusted someone else like he trusted Lily:

“I’m sorry.” “I’m not interested.” “I’m sorry!” “Save your breath.” It was nighttime. Lily, who was wearing a dressing gown, stood with her arms folded in front of the portrait of the Fat Lady, at the entrance to Gryffindor Tower. “I only came out because Mary told me you were threatening to sleep here.” “I was. I would have done. I never meant to call you Mudblood, it just—” “Slipped out?” There was no pity in Lily’s voice.

(DH, 571)

Is he a blood-purist who thinks Lily is a perfect muggleborn and therefore an exception to everything? Yes. Severus is in the wrong here about calling Lily a mudblood and thinking it's fine because she's a good mudblood, she's not like the other muggleborns. Lily has every right to cease her friendship with him over it.

But it's telling about his priorities the first thing he does is try to fix their friendship, to apologize to her.

Did he deserve to be hanged upside down and likely stripped in the middle of a large audience at school? Hell no. James probably didn't see it as a big deal, but it's so messed up I don't really know what to say, really. Like, I think Severus definitely fought back and wasn't always the victim of the Marauders, though. In the scene I mentioned above with Mulciber it's implied Severus and his Death Eater buddies are just as bad as James and the Marauders are. Their targets are just different. I think what James did is awful and inexcusable, but at the same time, I think, in the same way Tom Riddle hung Billy's rabbit to scare his bullies away, Severus tried to do the same, if less successfully. It's why he invented spells like Langlock (used in SWM on him) and Sectumsempra.

A lot of his demeanor is the result of abuse. He bullies and scares his students because he's mimicking his father, his abuser. he learned from him to control by force, with fear threats, and degradation. Because that's what Severus experienced as a child. Also, the fact he became a professor as young as he did, meant he felt had to force his students to take him seriously. Some of his first students probably saw him in his lowest moments as a student himself. So, he resorted to the fear and insults that his father likely used when he wanted to be taken seriously.

I truly think the loss of Lily's friendship is what stung the most about the whole ordeal of SWM. I mean, Severus has a lot of bad memories. I'm sure this wasn't the only time he was humiliated and assaulted. He was abused by his father. He was almost killed by Lupin as a werewolf during the prank. And then he joined a terrorist organization where he was likely tortured, where he likely watched people die. And in all of this, his worst memory is this one case of assault that I doubt was the only one? This doesn't make much sense to me, I think it's his worst memory not because of what happened to him, but because he lost his friendship with Lily over what he considers a "stupid slip".

And yeah, after Lily's death, in his mind, Snape raised her to a saintly status. He never has a mean thought about her, because he feels guilty over her death. He feels like he killed his only defender. So, of course, his memories of her are colored like she was perfect. That's how he wants to remember her so he can keep feeling guilty and hating himself over it. He feels like he deserves to feel that way. This is something you see with victims of abuse, they rationalize their abuse by convincing themselves they deserve it.

And Snape is a very bitter character who doesn't want to get better.

As for whether I think he found solace in the Evans household the same way Harry did with the Weasleys? The answer is yes actually. And there's some evidence for it.

Lily knew things weren't good at home for Severus:

“How are things at your house?” Lily asked. A little crease appeared between his eyes. “Fine,” he said. “They’re not arguing anymore?” “Oh yes, they’re arguing,” said Snape. He picked up a fistful of leaves and began tearing them apart, apparently unaware of what he was doing. “But it won’t be that long and I’ll be gone.”

(DH, 563-564)

And Severus mentioned later in that conversation how his father doesn't just not like magic — he doesn't like anything. Severus and his mother are very clearly implied to be abused by his father when his mother is mentioned. He doesn't describe much of what goes on at home, he tries to act fine, but I'm calling it abuse because of what it most likely is. Severus can't wait to leave home as an eleven-year-old. This isn't something that usually happens in healthy households.

Additionally, Severus spent enough time in their house it was conceivable he and Lily snuck into Petunia's room to find her letter to Hogwarts:

“You shouldn’t have read—” whispered Petunia, “that was my private—how could you—?” Lily gave herself away by half-glancing toward where Snape stood nearby. Petunia gasped. “That boy found it! You and that boy have been sneaking in my room!”

(DH, 566)

So, he probably stayed over with the Evans parents most of the day and only returned home to sleep. That's what I think happened. And, Lily's parents seem very kind and accepting of magic from what little we hear of them:

Lily glanced toward her parents, who were looking around the platform with an air of wholehearted enjoyment, drinking in the scene. Then she looked back at her sister, and her voice was low and fierce

(DH, 566)

“You knew?” said Harry. “You knew I’m a — a wizard?” “Knew!” shrieked Aunt Petunia suddenly. “Knew! Of course we knew! How could you not be, my dratted sister being what she was? Oh, she got a letter just like that and disappeared off to that — that school — and came home every vacation with her pockets full of frog spawn, turning teacups into rats. I was the only one who saw her for what she was — a freak! But for my mother and father, oh no, it was Lily this and Lily that, they were proud of having a witch in the family!”

(PS, 41)

I think Severus preferred the Evans house over his own. His own where his parents argued and his father abused him and his mother. Where his parents both worked and left him wandering the streets as a young child.

As for whether the Evans parents ever tried to report Tobias, we just don't really know. I'd say no. Domestic abuse in the 1970s was still largely unrecognized and not treated legally and medically like it is today. So, I don't think they'd have anyone to report to even if they wanted to. Especially with where the Snapes lived, which was essentially slums that the police didn't bother with anyway.

[sofoulandfairaday]

Also got any sev ones?

If I have any Severus Snape headcanons? I think I might have to put this one under the cut bby, it's going to be loooong. Edit: it got severely out of hand, be warned this is insanely long.

BUT FIRST: this is a very long but extremely well-written meta about the Snapes' peculiar type of poverty that you should all read when you have time. Like, save it for later somewhere or whatever, but seriously. Do yourself a favour.

Some people like to headcanon Remus Lupin (!) as the Hogwarts drug dealer. Nu-uh. That's Snape. Severus, for the right price, can and will provide you with any kind of potion (assuming he can steal the ingredients from the supply closet/his fancy pureblood housemates can get him whatever he needs). See this post.

But it's not just potions. He'll write your essays for money (his prices go up as the years go by, but so does his credibility). Snape is the only reason Avery ever passed 4th year Transfiguration.

Until his 6th/7th year, when he was no longer friends with Lily and started expressing a vocal desire to join the Death Eaters, he wasn't accepted or popular in Slytherin House.

Avery and Mulciber, the only people who could be considered his friends, were still pretty classist and racist towards him and even then he only got to be part of their little circle because he knew more curses when he arrived at Hogwarts than half the kids in seventh year.

You see, he wasn't just a Halfblood (they have those in Slytherin), he was also dirt poor, and pretty rough around the edges. He wasn't refined, he swore like a sailor, he was classless, and “dirty” and had worn-out clothes and second-hand books, he was canonically ugly and twitchy as a child, and Sirius (who is still from the very elegant, very posh Black Family) describes him as a little oddball.

Never mind the suave adult Snape (who is very different in the books and in the movies, anyway). My man Eliza Doolittle-ed himself. He did a Tom Riddle.

But he was powerful enough that the hazing and bullying inside his own House stopped almost immediately when he got there. You despised Snape? Fine. You attacked Snape? Suddenly your pet cat has been poisoned and your kneecaps were jinxed backwards.

Also, Lucius Malfoy promptly singled him out, and while he was still in school (Sev's first and second year) he did what he could to shield him, and to make him just a little more credible and refined in Slytherin. Severus followed him around like a little puppy and definitely acted a bit like an errand boy for him and his friends, which is also part of the reason why Sirius calls him Lucius Malfoy's lapdog in OotP. I wouldn't say they were really friends though. He knew them, and maybe they liked him, but he wasn't their equal.

Unfortunately, the Marauders' bullying only got worse as the years went by, and Lucius had graduated by the time SWM happened (I think that and the Prank were the worst, but I also like the headcanon that they were not. That Snape put that particular memory in the Pensieve because it was the time he lost Lily, not because it was the worst time he was bullied by them. From the way he reacted to their attack, this level of viciousness was probably common. By the way, even if you dislike him as a character, if you deny that what he suffered at the hands of the Marauders was vile, I don't know what to tell you.)

I wouldn't say a good rapport with Narcissa Black - because why would a girl from the upper years hang out with a boy from the first three? - but she would be kind to him, and chat politely sometimes. She was impressed with him - the first Halfblood she had ever given the time of day to.

Do you know who wasn't (lol)? Bellatrix. Who had graduated years before and just could not understand why Narcissa and Lucius would be so fond of this little scrawny upjumped Halfblood.

With the exception of Andromeda (who doesn't know who he is) and Narcissa (who really likes him), all of the Blacks hate Snape. Regulus doesn't hate him per se but thinks him unrefined and overreaching and they also have a bit of a not-so-friendly competition going on even though they come from different years. Sirius and Bella... well, you know. (credit: @hxuse-xf-black, I think this hc is theirs)

One of my favourite headcanons is that the last Black family event Sirius ever attended was Narcissa's wedding (1976) [the last one Andy ever attended was Bellatrix's (1972)]. He was there as the bride's cousin, obviously. But but but. Snivellus Snape was also there, as the groom's best man (alongside Evan Rosier and Rodolphus Lestrange). The two almost get into a Muggle brawl, and an enraged Bellatrix is the one who has to separate them (how dare you try to ruin Cissy's big day?!). She would have happily let them kill each other on any other occasion, but that was her little (only) sister's wedding and she very violently cursed them both.

Started smoking cigarettes when he was young and never really stopped.

What tea does Snape drink?

Bad personal hygiene since he was a boy, especially in his periods of worst depression. Paradoxically, he was at his most groomed during his Death Eater years (1978-1981) because he had to deal daily with the likes of Lucius Malfoy and Rodolphus Lestrange, who might have been domestic terrorists but had standards.

Speaking of which. Bella hates him. I still have to decide how Rodolphus feels about him (Rod definitely defends him when the two of them are having a row, just to piss her off, but I don't know how he actually feels). I think they had slightly different social circles. As Sirius says, they were all - at different points in time - part of a gang of baby Death Eaters in school. But I see Bella & Rod as very close with Rabastan, and Rabastan as very close to Barty (the four of them even tortured the Longbottoms together, which means they definitely talked to each other in the very hectic days after Voldemort's downfall). In my headcanons Barty and Regulus are glued at the hip, so basically that's the five of them already.

It was a period of brilliant students for Hogwarts, nothing like Harry's time. James and Sirius were prodigies, Regulus gives me mad scientist vibes (also, he must have been knowledgeable in the Dark Arts seeing as he figured out about Voldemort's Horcruxes in no time), Barty brought home twelve O.W.L.S. (how?), and Snape was inventing curses.

The latter three were tentative allies in school, but Barty&Reg (who definitely had something going on if you know what I mean), pureblood and proper, with all of the entitlement that must have come from their bloodlines and talent, definitely were not his fans.

No one could understand his fixation with “that Mudblood” (Lily); Lucius was particularly overjoyed when he heard of their falling out. (This came back to bite him in the ass when he was the one who had to physically drag him out of his house, at Spinner's End, after she died and he was determined to rot and kill himself with alcohol.)

Cat person. But never owned any pets because he could not keep one alive. Except of course when he owned a rat... err... I mean, when Peter lived with him.

I am convinced the man took stimulants. Whatever the equivalent of wizard cocaine was (probably a potion he made himself, with minimal comedown and as little side effects on the body as he can), he took. He seems to spend his nights patrolling the corridors and his days teaching, so when does he sleep?

Extremely light sleeper anyway.

Can go without eating for a long time.

He is the personification of self-loathing.

I can see him self-harming in different ways. He denies himself the small pleasures of life, he smokes until his throat burns and his lungs hurt, and insists that he works best without protective gloves (more sensitivity or whatever) which means that his hands are covered in small cuts and stains from corrosive (possibly painful) potions.

Does whatever he can to look as little like his father as possible, whether that be growing a beard, or gaining weight, or cutting his hair.

He maintains that learning Occlumency saved his life. Legilimency is about control, and even that not-so-hidden sadistic part of him, and also the self-protection that comes from knowing your opponent's moves before they can strike. But Occlumency and the sort of meditative bliss that comes from Occluding heavily was an integral part of his transformation, and very definitely helped with the very obvious anxiety that plagued him as a boy. It's yoga + good weed at the same time. That's the feeling.

The Lily thing. Part of it was romantic but in the light I-am-thirteen-and-have-a-crush-on-my-best-friend type of way. He definitely thought he was in love with her when he was sixteen/seventeen, after they had cut ties, and that's how he explained it to Voldemort, too (and that's how Voldemort explains it to Harry - he desired her). But. Truthfully? No. After a while, and especially after her death, it wasn't about the love he felt for her, it was about the debt he owed her. She was the first person to be kind to him, and he betrayed her. Directly caused her death, and sold her to the most evil wizard in history. Whether you love someone romantically or platonically, being responsible for their death, or leaving a child as an orphan takes a toll on your psyche that's almost impossible for me to comprehend or explain. Imagine the level of guilt that he felt. She was his first friend, his first crush, his first everything. And his love for her was the love Dante felt for Beatrice, the love that moves the sun and the other stars. I hate it when they reduce it to “he just wanted to bang Harry's mom haha”.

With that being said, Snily is probably the most boring Severus ship of all.

Never planned for the future. He honestly didn't think he would survive the war; his character is pretty much doomed by the narrative, and I am convinced that the only thing that kept him going was fulfilling his promise to Dumbledore, taking down the Dark Lord. He always thought Voldemort would eventually discover he was a spy and kill him for it. And as sad as it is (and that's why I love those kinds of fanfics!) I cannot see him ever adapting to a post-Voldemort world. It would take a lot of work on himself for him to find peace and I don't think he loved himself enough for that. I don't think he wanted to live.

Also, while I love the fanfics where he eventually makes up with Harry, and they have a civil relationship, I cannot see it happening in canon.

The narrative draws very explicit parallels between Snape and Voldemort, there are so many (but not limited to): the social class they come from, their blood status, the abuse they face as children, this iconic line which is one of my favourites in the whole series: But he was home. Hogwarts was the first and best home he had known. He and Voldemort and Snape, the abandoned boys, had all found home here, the details we can infer of their relationship with Dumbledore when they were still students, the transformation they operated on themselves to become more polished, their interests (both of them invent curses and the like), the way they identify with their mothers' heritages, their dynamic is extremely interesting to me.

My headcanon is that Snape was one of the few people Voldemort actually liked (and perhaps he saw himself in), which would explain why he doesn't heed Bella's advice about him. Of course, it was a very tepid intellectual appreciation (just a tad warmer than his - very cold - expression of regret at having to kill him in the Shrieking Shack), but it was there. I think they had a teacher-student dynamic which doesn't get explored enough but was clearly there: Voldemort teaches Snape how to fly without a broom; he is reportedly the only Death Eater to whom he teaches this. I think Snape was absolutely fascinated with LV in the beginning and climbed through the ranks impressively quickly. Just as rapidly (maybe more) as purebloods Regulus Black (whose cousin was LV's right-hand woman and possible mistress) and Barty Crouch (who would have been an asset seeing his father's position). Keep in mind these guys weren't even 20 years old and had all met Voldemort personally, probably more than once. They would have been part of his inner circle.

I can see Voldemort appreciating Snape's interest in magic, especially his academic interest. I think it's especially fascinating if compared to Voldemort's relationship with Bellatrix (who was the opposite of Snape in every sense): I think someone like Voldemort would be attracted to someone like Bellatrix (rich, pure of blood, self-assured, inhabiting a world built for her, etc.) but on the other hand he would also resent her for these very things that were her prerogative, and not his. On the other hand, Snape would understand him on a personal level, he would simply get some of Voldemort's lived experiences (and personality, let's be real) in a way his other Death Eaters wouldn't. But, because he still represents his past in a way (and hasn't remade himself quite yet), Voldemort would also view him with contempt. (And a great deal of superiority, but he's like that with everyone).

Snape doesn't join the Death Eaters because of the Cause. I can see him hating Muggles and perhaps looking down on Muggle-borns, but I don't think of him as a convinced pureblood elitist in the way the Lestranges and Malfoys were. He joined for power. He wanted revenge, and he wanted to feel powerful and important in a world that would make him feel small (part of the reasoning behind Bellatrix's joining in my headcanons), which makes him much hungrier than his peers, which would make him stand out to Voldemort.

His invention of the Sectumsempra spell and its counter-curse is extremely impressive, even Bella had to recognize this when she found out, and she demanded it be taught to the younger recruits, (but really to herself).

Hates summer like no one else has ever hated summer.

Helped with Draco's conception. I headcanon that Narcissa had fertility problems (this extends, for me, to most women of the Black family) and Severus helped her and Lucius with it. (This hc isn't mine, but I love it to death.)

Any and all silly headcanons about Snape teaching sex ed, dealing with periods, etc give me life. You've all read them though, so I won't repeat them.

Worked as a potioneer for Voldemort too, perhaps alongside someone who was even better than him (older, more knowledgeable). The things he learned turned out to be super useful to him in the future.

His favourite food is fish and chips, or something equally proletarian, like beans on toast... that sort of thing.

Detested living with Pettigrew (and I hc that Voldemort did it as a form of cruel punishment: he's forced to live with - offer shelter to - the man who caused Lily's death).

Because I like angst, I really like the idea that the person he was closest with, in the entirety of the Hogwarts staff (except maybe for Dumbledore) wasn't McGonagall, it was Charity Burbage. I need more fics with an in-depth exploration of their relationship (whether it be romantic or platonic) because it has amazing potential, both for angst and fluff.

Idk how anyone can ship Snily when these two are right there

Also, she would be the second woman Severus loves that Voldemort has killed. This time it's even worse.

I doubt he could ever have had a functioning relationship with her (or any other woman, or person), because what flesh-and-blood woman could ever beat the lamented and idolised spirit of Lily Evans? She would stand no chance. Again, this makes it worse.

I'm going to stop here because this is getting embarrassing. Kudos to you if you got to the end of this.

Headcanons: James | Sirius | Remus | Lily

[dinoplantsghost]

pairing: Tom Riddle x fem! original character

warning(s): tom is a warning in itself, 1940s: time accurate misogyny (???) and r@c!sm, canon-compliant prejudice & name-calling, teenage behavior (boys smh), language (swearing), mentions of murder & death

word count: ~4303

Disclaimer: I have a huge google doc that holds all of my drafts and I'm quite literally just copypasting everything, so if there are any typos/errors, no there isn't!! :)

-- I hope yall can see that I don't know how to name chapters lol

Chapter List

Planning Ahead [2]

“Who is that, when did we get a new student?” 

“Her hair is an absolute disaster! Do you think she’s a metamorphmagus?” 

“What an awful time to transfer; does she even know any English?“

The whispers and stares grew stronger as the 5’6" girl walked through the large doors to the Great Hall, making her way to the long table in navy blue and bronze. Saoirse continued to ignore the comments and side-eyes and sat down at the very edge of the table, pulled out a thick book from her satchel and began reading in typical Ravenclaw fashion. 

At the next few tables over, a group of boys huddled amongst themselves. Out of the eight of them, they always surrounded one boy, without fail. He was the automatic leader of the group, the one they would turn to when in need, the one they were loyal to. He had them wrapped around his finger so effortlessly, and it disappointed him to see young men of such high status to be so dumb. 

“When are you going to make your move, Eloise,” Asked Cassius Mulciber, the sixth year of the group. “If you’re not going to do anything, I might just take her for myself.”

Eloise Avery scoffed. “If you think you have a chance against me,” he laughed, gesturing to himself. “You must have gone mental.” 

To the right of Eloise, Louis Rosier chimed in, mindlessly twirling his hair of honey into a braid. “I think you should totally try, ‘Cass,” he finished the braid with a tap of his wand, the ends of his hairs sticking together. “It wouldn’t hurt to.” 

Cassius reached across the table to give Louis a high-five, his wide build blocking the light from Patrick Nott, a fifth year of Austrian descent and the thinnest of the bunch. Irritated, Patrick placed his bookmark in the book he was reading, closed it, and slammed it repeatedly against Cassius’ left upper arm. “You. Bloody. Git!” He huffed, pushing his frames further up his nose bridge. “For the love of Merlin, sit down!” 

Cassius whipped his head around to the boy, his black and unkempt hair hitting the side of his face. Before he could get a word out, though, Headmaster Dippet stood up, projecting his voice with Sonorus. “Good morning, students. Today is the start of a new week, and with that being said, I would like to remind you all that playing Exploding Snap in the lavatories will result in a month’s worth of detention.” Laughter echoed throughout the Great Hall. “And before I finish this morning’s announcements, I would like to welcome our new student, Saoirse!” 

Dippet pointed his hand to the girl, who still had her head hanging low as she scanned the contents of Hogwarts: A History, unaware of the eyes staring at her. “Well,” the Headmaster coughed. “It seems like she is working very diligently to catch up to her peers. This is the perfect example of what your work ethic should look like, everyone. Now, pip pip!” Clapping his hands, he sat back down, quick to use Quietus to avoid any mishaps. 

Saoirse was finally pulled from her reading daze when she felt a tap on her shoulder. Looking up, she found a small man with elfish ears and crazed, white hair standing up in every direction. His eyes were kind and his smile was light. She could tell that he was a very genuine person. “Good morning, sir,” She smiled. 

“Good morning, my dear girl! My name is Linnaeus Flitwick and I am your Head of House. I’m here to give you your schedule.” He handed her a slip of paper before continuing, “Classes start soon, so be sure to leave the Great Hall soon so you’re in class on time, alright?” 

Saoirse nodded, skimming through the piece of paper that was given to her. “Thank you, sir.”

With her eyes falling on the schedule for Monday, she quickly found that she had Care of Magical Creatures first thing in the morning. She sighed, knowing that Riddle never gave her a tour of the outside campus, and threw her large book into her satchel, eating a couple pieces of fruit before leaving the Great Hall. As she left, the group of boys eyed each other. 

“I think we should have a bet,” said Cassius, shoving a piece of his fried egg into his mouth. “Whoever beds the new girl first gets five Galleons.” 

A boy with tan skin chuckled as he buttered the last of his bread. “You lot are ridiculous; there’s no way she’s going to fall for it.” 

“You’re just scared that you’ll lose, Lestrange.” Said Rosier.

“No, I could totally win against you idiots, but I have better things to do.” 

“Excuses, excuses.” Cassius laughed, waving a hand in the air. “What about the rest of you,” he asked, turning to the right to look at the other young men sitting at the table. “Do you want in on this glorious bet or are you too chicken to do so?” 

Abraxas Malfoy ran a hand over his pale face. “Absolutely not,” he sighed. “Father expects me to court and wed Torsia Adlard, remember? If I get caught with another girl, that blows any chances of me getting with Adlard.” 

Orion Black, who was sitting next to the platinum blond boy, hummed in agreement. “She doesn’t seem pure-blooded either,” he mumbled. “It would be devastating if one of you were to shag a Mudblood.” 

A chorus of acknowledgement rang throughout the table. “When you put it that way, I’ll pull out of the bet then.” Cassius hissed, running a hand through his ink hair. 

Miles Lestrange raised his eyebrows, putting down his goblet of pumpkin juice. “Oh? But you were the one who considered the bet in the first place.”

“Well that was before I thought about her blood status, Miles. If you think I'm still going through with it then you’re bloody crazy.” 

“I don’t care what she is, I’m going to get those five Galleons whether you like it or not.” Avery chimed in, earning a side eye from anyone who heard. 

“That’s just gross, Eloise,” Rosier whispered, sounding so disappointed and dejected, placing a hand on the strawberry blond’s shoulder. “Don’t do that to yourself, mate, five Galleons isn’t worth it.” 

“That insolent girl is not even worth a Knut.” Muttered the boy with ebony hair, situated in the middle of the posse. He closed his book looking upon the boys that stared back at him in anticipation, drinking up his words like it was their Ambrosia. “That idiot of a Headmaster asked me to give her a small tour of the school after Astronomy,” he explained. “She’s nothing but an obnoxious broad and she is not worth anything, especially to the likes of us.”

Tom stood up and walked off to his first class, leaving the rest of the boys to themselves.

┌────── ⋆☆⋆ ──────┐

From a distance, a tall boy trotted down the courtyard, making his way to the first class of the day. Running a hand through locs of wavy, blond hair, his eyes fell on the apparent color of cerulean that stuck out from the green of dying leaves. He sighed, sucking the side of his cheek in contemplation before rolling his eyes and making his way to the lost foreigner. 

He could not understand why Avery, Rosier, and Mulciber had such an interest in her—before Orion had pointed out her unknown blood status. It seemed to him that she was nothing but an airhead, especially after what Riddle had said back in the Great Hall. So much for being in Ravenclaw considering her race, he thought. 

“Did you not see the map of the courtyard in that book of yours?” He asked, his velvety voice of dark chocolate enveloping the girl’s entire being as it seeped into her ears and flowed down her spine. 

Abraxas Malfoy watched through the permanent scowl on his face as Saoirse turned around to see his aristocratic figure tower over her as his eyes of muted eucalyptus stared into her. “No, I didn’t get the time to,” she muttered. A scoff bubbled in his throat at her timidness. “Do you happen to have Care of Magical Creatures as your first class as well?” 

Sighing once again, now knowing he had his first class with this girl, the fifteen year old boy nodded. Abraxas reluctantly pulled his right hand off from its place on top of his satchel—while using his left hand to grasp the strap—to point off in the distance to the right. Saoirse’s gaze followed his deathly pale finger and there sat a rickety fence made of dark wood. “Class is held near the outskirts of the Dark Forest, taught by Professor Thelma. You’re welcome.” 

Deciding to not entertain the girl any further, Abraxas walked off, shifting his hands to the way they were prior; his right hand fell back to its snug position on top of his satchel as his left went back to his cloak pocket. The blond continued to walk the way, ignoring how the girl he left behind painfully tried to catch up with his long strides. When he made it to the fence, Abraxas opened the wooden barrier and did not care enough to leave it open, letting it close on its own before the Asian girl could catch up and slide through as the latch accidentally jumped up and locked the fence. 

“Good morning class! Today we will be continuing our lesson on the Unicorn,” a nasally and feminine voice rang in the ears of the students standing around near the fence. “Luckily, I was able to talk to an old friend of mine who’s a Magizoologist and convinced her to let us see Unicorns up close.” 

Elsie Thelma, professor of the Care of Magical Creatures class, was a small woman. So small, in fact, one could mistake her for a half-goblin. The round woman had fiery red hair flaring out of her tall witch’s hat with crooked frames barely balancing on her nose bridge. Her eyes held the curiosity of a thousand children, sparkling with the blue of the ocean crashing against the rocks. 

With the wave of her hand, Professor Thelma guided the crowd of children away from the rickety picket fence and deeper into the lush green forest, magic intertwined within the roots, leaves and meer fibers of every plant and fungi and budding fruit. 

Abraxas was never one for the outdoors, despite having the Quidditch position of chaser on the Slytherin team. Though, he thought, one was rarely on the ground when it came to Quidditch. He huffed, discreetly dragging the top of his tailored Oxford shoe against some rough bark to scrape off the discolored mud and wincing as he thought about the multitude of scratch marks damaging the leather. 

“Alright class, I advise you all to be very quiet and still,” Thelma instructed. “As any sort of fast movement or abrupt sounds can set them off. For this portion of the lesson we will be pairing up into groups of four, all while having two subunits within each. One unit will write down observations, preferably the boys, while the girls interact with the unicorn to identify its unique behaviors .” 

Professor Thelma’s voice rang in the blond boy’s ears, making him lift his head, walking away from the tree as he came up close to the rest of his peers. 

The short professor stood in front of the students, looking at each and every one of them carefully. After a few moments of silence, the lady hand-picked the students to group up and start their observations on their assigned Unicorns that stood proudly in the clearing ahead. 

“And with this group,” Thelma said softly. “You will have the new student—Saoirse. Malfoy, I trust that you inform the girl of our prior knowledge as she wasn’t present for the first portion of this lesson.” 

“Oh, there’s no need to, professor. I’ve read about Unicorns before,” a soft voice chimed in, alarming Abraxas as he whipped around to stare dubiously at the girl with jade eyes. “I wouldn’t want the group to fall behind from the rest.” 

“Brilliant then! Go on then, get to work, children.” Thelma smiled, shooing the group of 5 away to the last horse that fed on the grass by its lonesome. 

The group stood around awkwardly, unable to shake off a creeped out feeling as the new girl stared at them expectantly. One of them, a Griffyndor boy, coughed into his fist. “Erm, are you sure you know enough about Unicorns? I’m sure you’ve never seen a Unicorn before in your life.” 

Saoirse shrugged, smiling weirdly at the boy. “We’ll see.” 

┌────── ⋆☆⋆ ──────┐

Turns out, Saoirse was well informed. However, things turned south when the girl tried to walk up to the horned horse. The Unicorn turned tense, its ears flicking in her direction as it stared into her soul. With some encouragement from the others in the group, Saoirse tried to show an open palm, but that only aggravated the Unicorn more. Eventually, they settled to switch roles between Saoirse and Abraxas. 

“Why did you transfer to Hogwarts, especially when we’re in the middle of our first term?” A girl asked, the yellow in her robes catching in Saoirse’s eyes. 

“I was expelled,” she said, shaking off a salamander from her shoe. “The High Priestess was more than welcome to kick me out; she always disliked me.” 

“Expelled,” echoed the other Ravenclaw in the group. Saoirse never bothered asking for their names. “What did you do?” 

She held her tongue; she obviously couldn’t say she accidentally killed someone. She was starting to really like Hogwarts, so it would be sad to leave so soon. “I was experimenting,” Saoirse evaded. “An accident happened and it ruined my dorm. By ruining school property, along with other instances prior, the High Priestess was more than ready to expel me sooner or later.” 

Abraxas, who was standing brushing the hairs from the Unicorn’s eye, frowned. It didn’t really make sense for her to transfer all the way to Scotland, especially since Mahoutokoro was in the far east of Japan. If anything, the closest school she could have gone to was in Uganda, Uagadou. Of course, there were other minor institutions, but it wasn’t likely for the girl to have transferred to any of those as they were very selective and couldn’t afford to have a student with a bad transcript in their student body. 

Perhaps she had connections, he thought. Scotland is far from Japan or east Asia in general, and the only sensible reason for her to be here is that she knows someone in the area. 

“What is that over there?” Saoirse asked, pointing off to the distant trees. There was an open area, the grass and other vegetation stomped flat by whatever creatures lived in the forest. Looking over with disinterest, Abraxas saw a horse-like figure, its large leathery wings flexing as its odd snout sniffed the ground. 

“There’s nothing there.” Said the Hufflepuff girl, the other students in the group voicing their agreement. 

“No, really, there’s a horse there—or, well, it’s not really a horse; it’s—” 

“It’s a Thestral,” Abraxas said, gaining the attention of the group. “They carry the carriages for the upper years. Only people who have witnessed death can see them.” 

“A Thestral,” frowned the other Ravenclaw student. “We learned about those in Divination class; they’re really bad omens.” 

Now worried, the Hufflepuff girl and the Gryffindor student backed away. They suggested walking back to the fence, as class was almost over anyways. “Of course you would be able to see Thestrals, Malfoy,” muttered the Gryffindor. “I bet you and your family bond quite well over killing those who aren’t like you, huh?” 

“You have no idea what you’re talking about.” Abraxas protested, getting hot in the face as he strided up to the student in red. “You stupid, bloody Gryffindors love causing trouble; you must be a Mudblood if you’re that passionate about less people dying.” 

“That’s incredibly insensitive of you,” the Ravenclaw student huffed. “It shouldn’t matter if they weren’t pureblooded, they were still people.” Abraxas furrowed his brows, his upper lip lifting at the corner as he looked at the boy in disgust. To Saoirse, it was the most emotion she had seen from the boy with platinum blond hair. “You’re not even a good Ravenclaw, you know that? For being the house of intelligence, you’re bloody daft; Thestrals are anything but bad omens—quite curious creatures, actually.” 

“We shouldn’t be fighting, guys,” fretted the Hufflepuff. “Let’s get back to the rest of the class. We’re bothering the Unicorn.”

Abraxas bit his tongue, his nose flaring as he glared at the girl, who flinched in return. Running a hand through his hair, he kicked up the dirt, offending both boys as he walked off without another word. 

┌────── ⋆☆⋆ ──────┐

“And they were just complaining—it was so bloody annoying; I wish I could have hexed them.” 

“I would have as well. That Kowalski kid always wants to start something with you. Maybe he fancies you,” Joked Lestrange, earning a rough push on his shoulder by Abraxas. 

“Don’t joke about that, I would end my life if that were the case.” He shuddered. He couldn’t imagine a half-blood like Kowalski pining over him—though many people did. 

The two boys, along with the rest of the Slytherin posse, were waiting for their bi-weekly meeting to start. They sat around in a spacious room, chandelier dangling above them as they sat around at a round table. 

When they first started these meetings, they were skeptical. Their leader, Tom, was odd. Despite being a Slytherin, his surname wasn’t well known in the Wizarding community. Everyone knew everyone in Slytherin, mainly consisting of high-class pureblood families and being a generally tight-knit House. They didn’t really tolerate any other House, they were often outcasted or rejected—from Gryffindor, mainly; Hufflepuffs had some good ones who were willing to look past the snake house’s collective problems, and Ravenclaw had students with similar world views. 

They had every reason to dislike Muggleborns; Muggles had been killing and burning their ancestors for years, and it felt like a dishonor to those who died at the hands of evil. Unfortunately, over the years Muggleborns had been accepted, along with those with mixed blood, which was also a disgrace. The culture was slowly fading away—the holidays, beliefs, it was all being replaced by things that had no place in a magical institution. What even was Christmas? Who the Hell was Jesus Christ? 

The group was given a promise, though. The promise to bring back their culture, to avenge their ancestors as they rid the world of Muggleborns and Halfbloods alike. Tom was sure to get them there. Time and time again he had proved to them he was worthy of being in Slytherin, despite their initial doubts. Their loyalty was set in stone once his lineage was discovered—their first assignment as the Knights of Walpurgis. He was a wonderful leader, always uplifting them and reminding them of their goals, of the right they had to take back what was once theirs. He stirred their ambitions, bringing out what made them Slytherins. Salazar was sure to be proud of his only heir. 

“Apologies for the wait,” Tom said, closing the large door that phased away into the wall. “Black’s cousin stopped me in the middle of the common room.” 

“Please don’t remind me of her, my Lord,” Orion blushed, gritting his teeth as the other boys’ guffaws reverberated in the large room. “I really don’t know why she’s like that.” 

“No matter, let us start the meeting; we have much to discuss.”

Ever since the group learned of Tom’s well respected ancestor, their main objective was to find the Chamber of Secrets. Unfortunately for them, the only person who would be able to find the room at all was Tom; only Salazer Slytherin’s descendants could open the Chamber. 

“I wasn’t able to find anything in the Library, my Lord,” Patrick said, his leg bouncing against the tile. “It’s like the staff erased all traces of Salazar Slytherin from the castle.” 

Miles nodded in agreement. “I had the same trouble as well. My mother owled me back and she said she’s never heard of any writings or stories of the Chamber of Secrets from anyone she knows—and she knows many people.” 

Tom bit the inside of his cheek. It was to be expected that they would end up in a dead end, but it was still frustrating. He was so close to finding out who he was, what he was meant for. His ancestor had helped build this school from the ground up and the impudent staff they were to respect could not even hold any amount of that towards one of Hogwarts’ founders. He knew he was meant to get to the Chamber; Salazar wouldn’t have created a beast just for it to rot down there with no way of unearthing it. 

“This may be a stretch, but,” Abraxas chimed in, the hairs on the back of his head standing up on its ends as Tom snapped his eyes towards him. “That new girl, Saoirse, she might know something.” 

Cassius huffed in amusement. “I knew you were interested in her.” 

Eloise slammed a hand on the table, much to Tom’s irritation, gawking at his blond friend. “You talked to her,” he asked, leaning over the table. “Did you throw me into the conversation? Please, mate, it’s been so long since I’ve had—” 

“No one here cares about your stupid sexual escapades,” Abraxas glared. “And no, you didn’t cross my mind once. During first period, Saoirse said she transferred to Hogwarts because she was expelled. She didn’t go into detail, but considering the fact she also revealed she can see thestrals, I doubt she was expelled for anything stupid like a prank gone wrong. I reckon she killed someone.” 

Murmurs rang throughout the room. “And why would you suggest that,” mused Tom, the frown on his face more apparent than ever. “If anything, something probably happened when she was younger; you cannot just assume she killed someone because she can see thestrals.” 

“That’s what I thought at first, but the more I think about it, she had no clue what a Thestral was until today—like she’s never seen one before.” 

“So what, Hogwarts has stooped so low that they just allow anyone into the school—including murderers? You can’t be serious, ‘Brax. They would have known that looking at her transcript.” Louis stressed. 

Mulciber shrugged, swirling a finger around the rim of his goblet, presumably filled with some kind of alcohol. “‘Dunno, Rose, peacock guy might have a point,” he said, ignoring the offended look Abraxas gave him.

“I told you to stop calling me that.” 

“And I said I would stop when your white chickens finally die, Malfoy.”

Tom supposed the theory Abraxas had was sensible, but he doubted the girl knew anything about the four founders. She was reading Hogwarts: A History this morning, for Merlin’s sake. ‘However,’ he thought back to the night before, the moment when he showed Saoirse the door to Merrythought’s classroom. 

Perhaps Abraxas had a point. If no one could get into the Chamber, then it may have something to do with Dark Magic; anything was plausible at this point and quite frankly, no matter how much it irked him to admit, Tom was desperate. “How do you suggest we get the girl to reveal this information to us? While she did mention Dark Magic during our conversation last night, she was too ditzy to keep a consistent word with.” He clicked his tongue at the mere thought of her insistent ramblings. 

Eloise snapped his fingers. “Then we get her to join the Knights of Walpurgis, or at the very least into our friend group. It hits all of our problems quite well, doesn’t it? It’s all the more reason for me to get close and bed her,” he smirked. 

“You need to stop thinking with your crotch, Avery, but I agree.” Cassius smiled, stretching his legs on his chair. “I would love to have a pretty girl with us.” 

Louis frowned, the grip on his goblet tightening unconsciously. “You’d really want to have her in the group just because she’s a girl?” 

“No, I’d like to have her here because she’s a pretty girl, Rose. We all know there aren’t many pretty purebloods here by our standards, and if this Saoirse girl isn’t a pureblood then at least we’ll have a simple pretty face in our midst.” 

Louis sighed. “Oh, okay.” 

“What do we do with her after, once we get whatever information we need?” Miles asked, seeming to be the only person besides their Leader to have a functioning brain. 

“What if we kill her after?” Patrick suggested coolly, halting the side conversations. He turned to Tom, who was more than eager to hear something he was comfortable with. “My Lord, you mentioned a few meetings before that you were looking into those things; what were they called—Horcruxes? I found whatever I could in the Restricted Section, as I’m sure you have as well, and in order to make a Horcrux, you must provide a sacrifice; you must consciously and willingly take a life without remorse in order to blight your soul and split it.” 

“I am still not convinced she has the knowledge we need to get into the Chamber of Secrets,” Tom sighed. “But this might have to do for now. However, the moment I see anyone slacking off, or that this girl is not providing us useful information, I kill her. Is that understood?”

“Yes, my Lord.”

Credit(s): Dividing banner (^^^) by Chen Lu (1436-1449) - "Plum Blossoms in Moonlight" scroll painting; sourced through Pinterest

[ilovefandoms102]

We were Written in the Stars-Part 2

Pairing: Sirius Black x Plus Size Reader

Summary: A brawl with some Slytherins leads to confessions…

Note: I’m so excited to be doing this for my HP lovers please let me know what you guys think!

Warnings🛑: wand battles, use of unforgivable curse

Part 1 Part 3

“I can’t believe you,” I sneered once Sirius and I made it out to the hallway.

“What?” Sirius asked, obviously getting agitated with me.

“You’re a hypocrite that’s what you are Sirius!” I shouted at him, walking faster to get away from him.

“What the fuck do you mean?” Sirius shouted back at me.

“You and James pick and pick at Severus, and that’s exactly what your family does to you! And do you like it? No, you came to live with us!” I yelled, spinning around to face him once we got to a quieter space.

“That’s different Jags, and you know it.” Sirius whispered, looking at the ground.

“No it isn’t Sirius, it’s still bullying. You need to stop the childish nonsense. There is no reason you should be so cruel to Severus, he’s done nothing to you.” I said, crossing my arms over my chest.

“He hangs out with bloody Mulciber and Avery, you know what they’re apart of,” he whispered, looking around to make sure no one was listening.

“Even if they are death eaters Sirius, it’s none of our business unless they actively hurt someone because of their influence.” I reminded him.

Someone cleared their throat, we turned to see who it was. Well, speaking of the devil himself. Mulicer and Avery, along with several other Slytherins stood in front of us.

“Relationship troubles Black?” Mulciber chuckled tauntingly, walking past with a few fellow Slytherins.

“Wouldn’t be any of your business if I was Mulciber.” Sirius scoffed, pulling me with him to get away from them.

The group stepped in front of us, some of them going behind us. We were surrounded. I grabbed Sirius’ arm, clutching my wand that was in my robe pocket. These Slytherins were ruthless, it was rumored that they were death eaters. People who were following a dark wizard to wipe out muggle borns and half bloods.

Sirius’ family was in the sacred circle, or his parents were anyway. This dark wizard only inviting blood supremacists to join him. I stood on the other side of Sirius so my back was to him, ready if the people behind us tried to attack.

“Going somewhere Black? Potter?” Avery asked, whipping his wand out.

“Are you that threatened by us Mulciber that you had to bring all your little friends?” Sirius taunted, no doubt making the situation worse.

“Sirius shut the hell up!” I griped, watching as the boy in front of me pulled out his wand. I acted before he did, not letting him get the upper hand.

“Expelliarmus!” I yelled, flicking my wand.

The boy in front of me, Lucius Malfoy, snarled at me. He retrieved his wand before firing a nonverbal spell at me. I blocked it with ease, both of us firing spells back and forth. I could feel Sirius’ movements at my back, him and Avery in a duel while Mulciber sat and watched.

“Can’t even fight your own battles can you Mulciber!” Sirius laughed, making me want to punch him.

“Sirius are you trying to make things worse?!” I yelled at him, but that split second I turned was the worst mistake I could have made.

“Crucio!” Lucius yelled, grinning from ear to ear.

“NO!” Sirius roared, but couldn’t turn to watch.

In that moment, I was terrified, completely immobilized by the severe pain the spell had caused me. It felt like every bone in my body was breaking, I could feel each string of pain flowing down my body. I fell to the ground, twitching and convulsing. Lucius stood above me, his wand pointed at me. He had a sinister grin on his face, and that look would come to haunt me for years to come.

I now knew why that spell was apart of the Unforgivable Curses. I wanted to curl into a ball and die right then and there, tears were pouring down my face. My head fell to the side, my eyes trying to make sense of my surroundings. I could hear shouting, but it sounded as if I were in a tunnel. The sound echoing in my ears, a ringing sound drowning every word. Then Sirius appeared in front of me, his form was blurry as I was on the verge of passing out.

“Jags! Can you hear me? Sweetheart can you hear me?” he asked, pushing some hair out of my face.

“P-Pads I-I…it hurts” I croaked, barely managing to get the words out.

“I know darling, I’m going to take you to your room ok? I’m going to carry you.” Sirius said, hoisting me up before I could protest. I grunted as he adjusted me in his arms.

“I-I-m s-sorry Siri,” I whispered, burying my face in his neck.

“What for love?” he asked quietly.

“What I said e-earlier, I like that you live with us..I didn’t mean that in a bad way.” I mumbled.

“I know my darling, I know.” he assured me as he kept walking.

We got to the common room, the rest of our group already there. My brother jumping up from his spot beside Lily as soon as we walked in. Remus looking at me with concerned eyes while Peter’s eyes widened from his chair across from Remus.

“What the fuck happened?!” James demanded, standing up immediately.

“What in the world?” Remus gasped, rushing over to Sirius and I.

“We were in a duel with Mulciber and Malfoy” Sirius grunted, setting me on the couch.

Lily wrapped me in a blanket, grabbing some tea for Sirius and I. My hands wouldn’t stop shaking, I could still feel the pain flowing down my body.

“Sis, are you ok?” James asked, bending down to be in front of me.

“He used the Cruciatus curse on me James, Merlin’s beard I never want to go through that ever again.” I sobbed, Sirius setting on the arm of the couch by my head to stroke my hair.

“That son of a bitch!” James yelled, standing up and pacing to the door.

“And just where do you think you’re going?” Lily asked, standing to her feet.

“I’m going to find him, and kill him.” James gritted through his teeth.

“James no please, I don’t want you to get hurt!” I cried, attempting to get up to stop him but Sirius laid a kiss on the crown of my head before going towards my brother.

“Come on mate, I already took care of it. Don’t upset her even more.” Sirius spoke softly to James who was still breathing heavily.

“Prongs, you can’t just go out willy nilly, you have to think this through. If someone catches you-” Remus piped up from the table he was sitting at.

“That bastard hurt my sister, I don’t give a damn about the rules!” he shouted, his face turning red from anger.

“Yes James, but you can’t just go by yourself!” Lily exclaimed.

“Watch me Evans,” he sneered, walking through the portrait.

“James Potter don’t you dare!” Lily yelled, charging after him.

We could hear their bickering as they walked down the hall, all of us frozen in our spots. I rubbed at my temples, a headache starting to form from how exhausted I felt. I started to get up from the couch before Sirius stopped me.

“Woah now, take it easy darling.” he said, taking hold of my arms when I almost toppled over.

“I’m fine, I think I’ll head off to bed now. I’m exhausted.” I mumbled.

“Goodnight Jagsy, glad to see you’re alright love.” Remus said, smiling at me.

“Night Moony,” I said, smiling back at him.

“Goodnight guys,” Peter waved.

“I’ll see you all later,” Sirius said, starting to follow me.

“I’m ok Sirius, stop hovering over me.” I sighed, starting up the stairs to my room.

I heard footsteps behind me, turning to see Sirius behind me. I gave him a quizzical look, his beautiful eyes meeting mine.

“I want to make sure you get in alright,” he insisted, catching up to where I was on the stairs.

“Pads,” I huffed, hating that he was treating me like a baby.

“I’m not taking no for an answer Potter.” he said firmly, taking my hand as we walked to my room.

We made it to the room I shared with Lily, Sirius taking a seat on my bed. I gathered my pajamas, and other stuff I needed to get ready for bed. Sirius laid back on my bed, putting his hands behind his head.

“Making yourself comfortable huh Pads?” I laughed, he looked adorable.

“Your bed is much comfier than mine love, I’m staying with you from now on.” he sighed, closing his eyes.

“I don’t know how Lil would feel about that.” I said hesitantly, but couldn’t deny I loved the sound of that.

“So you wouldn’t mind me staying here if Evans didn’t room with you?” he asked, cracking a smile.

“Ok. I’m going to get ready for bed.” I said, embarrassed that I walked into that.

He laughed as I walked to the bathroom down the hall. I sat my stuff on the counter, taking a moment to process what happened today. I had never been in a duel that made me fear for my life. I could have died if Sirius hadn’t of been there with me. I thought about that war that’s upcoming, it disturbed me that people here at Hogwarts were joining the wrong side.

I shook my head, ridding myself of the thought as I got ready for bed. I walked back into my room, Sirius still laying on my bed. He had moved himself under the covers, his shirt laying on the floor.

“Are you spending the night Siri?” I chuckled, moving towards the bed.

“I’m so comfy I don’t want to get up.” he mumbled, reaching his arms out to me.

I joined him and snuggled close to him, burying my face in his neck. I inhaled his scent which calmed me more than my shower did. I was so in love with this man, I wished more than anything that he could be mine. I wish I could read his mind, see what goes on in that curly head of his.

“Sirius,” I whispered, pulling back to look at his handsome face.

“Yes darling?” he asked, opening his eyes to look at me.

“I was really scared today…I-If you hadn’t been with me-” I whimpered, tears resurfacing.

“Shhh now darling, it’s all over now. I won’t ever let anything like that happen to you again. I don’t like you being hurt.” Sirius whispered, wiping away my tears with his thumbs.

“You won’t always be with me Siri,” I pointed out, sniffling as I wiped at my face.

“I could if you wanted me to baby,” he smirked, a playful gleam in his eyes.

“I would kill you if you were attached to me 24/7 Pads.” I chuckled, loving how he always finds humor in everything.

“We’re in most of our classes together this year darling, better start getting used to it.” he smiled, kissing my nose.

We talked for a little while longer, most of it was Sirius cracking corny jokes to make me laugh. My spirit feeling much lighter than it did before. All because of this man beside me. My best friend, partner in crime, and the love of my life. The last part something he will never know. I got sleepy to the point I could barely hold my eyes open, struggling to stay awake.

“Go to sleep love,” Sirius whispered.

“Night Siri,” I yawned.

“Goodnight sweetheart,” he whispered.

I was warm, too warm.

I opened my eyes, the bright sun shining in through the stained glass window. I didn’t see Lily in her bed, wondering if she stayed in the common room or with my brother. I felt a shift in the bed next to me, causing me to tense up slightly. I looked over to see Sirius, his face buried in my pillow. His face was right next to mine, if I leaned over ever so slightly, my lips would brush against his. His hair was over his face slightly, soft snores leaving his lips. I shifted a bit, causing a groan from Sirius.

“Noooooo, you can’t leave.” he whined, moving his head to bury it in my chest.

“Pads, you’re too hot.” I groaned, pushing his shoulders.

“Well you’re not too bad lookin’ yourself darling.” he smiled, cracking his eyes open.

My cheeks warmed under his stare, I turned my head to look away from him.

“You’re so full of yourself Siri,” I mumbled, completely embarrassed with myself.

Lily then crashed in the room, her eyes wide at our current state. She quickly composed herself, leaning on the door frame. James trailed behind her, a not happy look on his face.

“What’s going on here?” James asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Nothing Prongs, we just woke up.” I said, rolling to get out of bed.

“You’re going to miss breakfast if you lot don’t hurry up.” Lily smiled, giving me a knowing look.

“Alright we’ll be down in a minute.” I grumbled, grabbing my stuff to get ready.

“What’s with you and Padfoot?” James asked me on our way to Herbology.

“Nothing James, we’re just friends.” I shrugged, hoping he couldn’t tell I was lying.

“Friends my ass, you looked awful cozy this morning.” he huffed, well I tried.

“James, he was worried about me. Friends are allowed to be worried about each other.” I exasperated, rolling my eyes at his protectiveness.

“He’s been a lot more friendly lately Jags, I think he’s got feelings for you. A lot more than friendly feelings.” he said, pushing his glasses up.

“Jamie,” I sighed, using my childhood nickname for him.

“It’s just…given his reputation, I just don’t want you to get hurt. It’s not that I would particularly mind you all being together. You know how he is.” James explained, both of us sitting at our table.

Remus and Sirius trailed in a little bit later, Sirius immediately smiling at the sight of me. He threw an arm around my chair, leaning back in his seat. James was staring at his long time best friend, a neutral expression that was hard for me to read. All our thoughts were interrupted when a certain group of Slytherins walked up to our table.

“Feeling ok Potter?” Lucius asked, a sly smirk on his face.

I looked at my friends, Sirius’ hands balling up on the table, James had a look of pure anger radiating off of him, and Remus narrowed his eyes at them.

“You have some nerve Malfoy,” James sneered, going to get up from his seat.

“Prongs, that’s enough” Remus whispered, holding down James in his seat.

“Walk away before I rip you to shreds asshole.” Sirius spat, sitting his fists hard on the table.

“Sirius,” I mumbled as I grabbed on to one of his arms.

“I’d thank you kindly to take your seats gentlemen.” Professor Beery griped.

They all took their seats, looking at us to only laugh among themselves.

“Siri, calm down love please.” I whispered to him, taking one of his hands in mine.

He calmed slightly, turning his hand to intertwine his fingers with mine.

“That tosser, wait until we’re alone and I’ll show him.” James gritted through his teeth.

“You don’t need another detention James, we need to focus on Quidditch. Tryouts are coming up and you can’t be getting in fights-” I whisper yelled at my twin.

“Stop acting like this isn’t a big deal! That fucker used an Unforgivable Curse on you!” he exclaimed quietly, at that moment I’m sure steam would have been coming out of his ears if that were possible.

“I know, I was there James, I don’t need you to fight my battles for me.” I said calmly.

James huffed, pushing his chair back loudly. He stormed out of class, Professor Beery looking irritated his class was disrupted. I wanted to follow after him, but I knew he needed some time to cool off. He has always been overprotective of me, as all the boys were.

Sirius had been quiet the rest of day, staying insanely close to me. He didn’t let me out of his sight, even once when I had to go to the bathroom he waited for me right by the door.

“You are a nutter Sirius Black,” I smiled, hoping to lighten his sour mood.

“I’m a nutter for you love,” he smirked slightly, causing butterflies to erupt in my stomach.

Although I know he didn’t mean it literally, I couldn’t help the emotions that were building deep in my soul. He grabbed my hand the mere second I exited the bathrooms, holding it tight. McGonagall even gave me a questioning look since Sirius had not once spoke up in her class. I shook my head, indicating that she didn’t want to know. After class during our free period I was able to talk to him alone in the common room.

“Siri are you alright? You haven’t been yourself today love.” I said softly, sitting cross legged beside him on the couch.

“I just keep thinking back to when I heard Malfoy say that curse, and the pure terror I felt when I heard you scream. I knew if I hadn’t of stayed with you I would have had nightmares.” he mumbled, staring straight ahead.

“There’s a war coming Sirius, and I think this was a major wake up call.” I said, leaning back into the couch.

“It was actually Snape that stopped the fight, his face looked horrified when he saw the aftermath the curse had on you.” he raised his brow, finally turning to look at me. His beautiful grey eyes meeting mine.

“He probably felt indebted to me since I stopped you from picking on the poor fellow.” I chuckled, looking down at my hands.

“Yeah, maybe.” he smirked, tossing his arm over the back of the couch.

“Are you ok now Pads? I have to get going soon.” I whispered, scooting a bit closer as I moved my eyes back to his.

“I’ll be alright darling, let me walk you to ole Slugies.” he smiled, offering a hand to help me up.

Sirius walked me to class, now acting more himself. He joked and carried on the whole way to Professor Slughorns while I got some evil glares from Sirius’ past flings. Marlene even gave me a dirty look, and to think she used to be my friend. Sirius stopped right outside the door, letting the other students fill the class before turning to look at me.

“I’ll see you in a bit darling, try not to have too much fun without me.” he grinned, pulling me closer to him.

I held my breath when he lifted his hand to place it on my cheek, his eyes stared deep into mine. He rubbed my cheek with his thumb, his eyes flicking from my eyes to my lips. He leaned closer, his lips just inches from mine. At the last second he turned. planting a gentle kiss on the corner of my mouth. My cheeks flamed, a gush of air leaving my lungs as I let out the breath I was holding.

“Bye Padfoot,” I mumbled, turning quickly to rush to my seat.

I felt so embarrassed, I couldn’t believe Sirius was about to kiss me. Then he changed his mind at the last minute, which made me feel even worse.

Maybe he was just caught up in the moment…more than likely he felt bad about what I had went through and feels a sort of responsibility for what happened. I’d known this man since I was eleven and I still could not figure him out.

I couldn’t hardly pay attention in Potions, my mind constantly wandering to my best friend who has my heart captive. No doubt if my brother suspected something the others did too. Well, maybe not Peter since he’s a bit slow. I felt nervous going to DATDA, I didn’t know how to react since we almost kissed.

Was I supposed to act normal?

Mad? Sad?

Just act like nothing happened?

I didn’t even wait for my friends to enter the classroom, I went straight to my seat. I got all my stuff out, ready to get this class over with. The Marauder’s piled in all at once, of course my brother on Lily’s tail. Sirius sat down heavy next to me, still laughing at something Moony had said.

I didn’t know what to say, so I opted for looking down at my notes. Sirius didn’t speak to me the whole class, the both of us I guess feeling awkward and not sure where to go from there.

I looked around the Quidditch pitch, taking in all the new comers. I was talking to Lily about our first game against Ravenclaw when I saw a black headed boy walking along with James.

It was Sirius.

“Well look at you Pads, decided to join the rest of us?” I quipped, excited that he was actually going to try out.

“Figured I try beating you at your own game Potter.” he smirked, going back to our normal selves.

“Bring it Snuffles,” I challenged, stepping up closer to him.

He narrowed his eyes, James chuckling off to the side. We went a few rounds, since James and I were captains, we decided to participate in the tryouts to see what the new people were about. Sirius of course did outstanding, even beating me a few times.

“Not so cocky now are we?” he smiled, sitting back on his broom.

“I’m still co-captain Pads, so I could not let you in.” I smiled slyly at him.

He flew closer to me until we were almost nose to nose.

“Hmmmmm, but I know you will darling.” he grinned, bumping my nose with his.

“Hey can you two stop snogging in the middle of a Quidditch game?!” James yelled, his hand over his eyes as he looked up at us.

After tryouts, I was sat in the common room, doing the ridiculous amount of homework McGonagall assigned for Transfigurations.

Three papers in three days? I was trying to be a good student and start early, but my mind was completely blank, rushing a million miles a minute, not letting me have one cohesive thought. I sighed, leaning forward to rub my fingers on my temples.

“Ahh, I see McGonagall has unleashed her essays already.” Remus said, coming to sit down next to me.

“Yeah, and it’s not like they’re hard…I just…” I sighed, irritated with myself.

“What’s on your mind love?” Remus asked, his brows furrowing in concern.

“If I tell you Rem, you have to swear that it stays between us.” I said, holding my pinky out for emphasis.

“Your secrets are always safe with me.” he smiled, linking his pinky to mine.

“Sirius almost kissed me today,” I blurted, holding my breath as I waited for his reaction.

“Wait you two haven’t kissed already?” he asked.

“Moony!” I exclaimed, hitting his arm playfully.

“Well I’m just saying, given with how you two have been lately. I just made the conclusion that you all were together.” he said, shrugging his shoulders.

“Sirius doesn’t even feel that way about me Remmy.” I mumbled, looking back at my papers.

“You’d have to be blind and stupid to not see how much that boy loves you Jagsy. He hasn’t came out and said it, but it’s not hard to conclude that he is head over heels for you.” Remus scoffed, smiling at my sour expression.

“Gee thanks,” I grmubled.

“I just mean that he has feelings for you that’s all.” he chuckled.

“What if it’s just a phase like one of his many other girls Rem?” I asked quietly.

“I think it’s different this time. I haven’t heard him once talk about another girl since we have been back. Maybe you should talk to him about it, that’s the only way you’re going to know.” he smiled softly.

“You’re right as always Moony,” I sighed, packing up my papers.

“I know, I have a habit of it.” he smirked.

I laughed, playfully shoving him.

“What are you two going on about?” Sirius asked, walking from the portrait.

“Nothing, just talking about McGonagall’s papers.” I said, Sirius narrowed his eyes at us.

“Well, I’m just heading to bed. See you guys tomorrow.” Remus said, dramatically yawning on his way upstairs.

“Do you like him?” Sirius asked when Remus was out of earshot.

“What? No!” I said, baffled by his question.

“Are you sure, you can tell me.” Sirius said, walking closer to me.

“Even if I did like him, it wouldn’t be your business.” I huffed, crossing my arms over my chest.

“You are my business sweetheart.” he whispered, his grey eyes hard as they stared into mine.

“I am not!” I gasped, turning to pick my books up.

“Stop pretending like you don’t feel anything y/n, like none of this is real!” he shouted suddenly, causing me to jump.

“Don’t you have someone to snog in the broom closet Padfoot?” I asked angrily, swishing my wand to take my books to my room.

“I’ve had plenty of offers, but here I am.” he said, throwing his arms up.

“I’m not just going to be one of your next conquests Sirius! I am a person with feelings, and I can’t just-” I croaked, looking away from his harsh gaze.

“You can’t what?” he asked, teeth gritting together.

“I can’t just be a one time thing and you drop me for someone else in the long run.” I admitted, tears threatening to spill.

“You know it’s not like that with you,” he mumbled, reaching out to touch me.

I stepped back, not wanting to hurt myself any further.

“You say that now, but what about in a week? Or I think a month is the longest you’ve lasted with someone.” I sniffled, feeling my heart break into a million pieces.

“They weren’t you darling. That’s why they didn’t last.” he confessed.

“What?” I said, flabbergasted by his confession.

“The reason all those girls didn’t work out…I came to the conclusion after Marlene that I was just using them as a distraction. I didn’t want to face the facts that I was falling in love with my best mates sister. Who was also one of my best friends in the entire world.” he professed, coming close to me again, He rested his hand on my cheek, this time I allowed him.

“Sirius, I know you feel like because of what happened with Malfoy that you feel a sense of responsibility for what happened. You don’t need to blame yourself for what happened.” I said, shaking my head.

“You think I’m confessing my feelings for you because of what happened?” he asked, he looked insulted.

“Sirius, I-….I can’t do this. I’m going to bed.” I mumbled, running past him to my room.

Sirius yelled after me, but I put up a blocking charm to prevent him from coming in my room. I laid on my bed and cried hard, my body wracking with sobs. I wanted so badly to believe him, this is all I had ever wanted. James is right though, his past with all those other girls has really put a strain on things.

I would be crushed to bits, to give myself to this man that I had loved for so long, and only for him to leave me for the next girl. My heart wouldn’t be able to take it, so I did what I had to do.

“Darling are you alright?” Lily asked, coming to the other side of my bed.

“I-I-” I sobbed. Lily climbed into my bed with me, holding my head in her lap as I cried. I told her everything, from what I was feeling to what had happened only moments ago.

“Oh Jagsy, I’m so so sorry.” she whispered.

“What idiot turns down the man of her dreams?” I cried out, feeling so stupid.

“An idiot who wants to protect her heart and not lose her friend.” she whispered.

“I think it’s a bit too late for that.” I croaked out.

“Let’s get some rest, we can talk more in the morning ok?” she said, smoothing my hair out of my face.

Lily stayed in my bed that night, letting me cry myself to sleep against her. I don’t know what I would do without her, she was such a kind soul. She saw the best in others, even when they couldn’t see it in themselves. She was always encouraging me to chase my dreams, to not care what other people would think of me.

I couldn’t imagine my life without her in it. And I hoped I would never have to.

[slyther-bi]

Since there's a lot of headcanons of Remus being the mom friend, I'm gonna go with it for this.

I got this au in mind.

Basically since Severus was friends with Avery, Mulciber, & Rosier- I like to think that Avery was the mom friend. Or just basically a buzzkill, I don't know why. Now since many people consider Remus to be the mom friend of the Marauders, imagine Remus & Avery swapping friends.

Ya know like the show 'Wife Swap' so Remus has to hang out & deal with Mulciber, Snape, & Rosier and Avery has to hangout & deal with Potter, Black, & Pettigrew.

They both write eachother a set of instructions to help them.

For Avery the instructions are simple.....it's basically just a schedule for quidditch that James and Sirius follow- obviously, a list of threats that'll help when they don't want to do homework, how to wake them up, places to hide all of Peter's snack, how to snap James out of his trance when he see Lily, and how to distract them from planning pranks depending on the prank.

The instructions for Remus- are a bit odd in his case. He's seen Avery with his friends before and they seem calm well sorta. He's seen them cause trouble but it's not as much as his friends. Plus he thinks the only issues he'll have is with Snape, considering James and Sirius like to mess with him.

He had re-read the instructions Avery left because he thought he read wrong when he first read them.

Don't leave Mulciber and Rosier alone together

Keep an eye on Severus at all times

Just don't blink

Stay away from butterflies

No strawberries

If you own anything blue don't let Rosier see it

If you own anything soft or shiny don't let Severus see it

Don't not wake any of them up, Severus wakes early so he'll wake Mulciber and Rosier

Quidditch schedule for Rosier

Bring up MacDonald and Mulciber will shut up if he starts getting angry

The list just gets more odd. He's confused but also curious about them. So when it comes to certian rules he does the opposite of what they say or he simply forgets only to find out why they were written in the first place.

Rule 6: If you own anything blue don't let Rosier see it

Remus: *accidentally wears a blue sweater*

Rosier: *hexes him and steals it, then searches his things for anything else blue*

Remus: What the hell!!!

Mulciber: He likes blue

Rule 2: Keep an eye on Severus at all times

Remus: *putting away his homework* Alright time to go to- *looks around* Where the hell is Snape

Mulciber & Rosier: *shrugs*

Remus: He was here just a minute ago, I literally just gave him back his notes- I didn't even hear the door open!

Rosier: He does that alot

Remus: Seriously?!

Mulciber: That's why Avery is always looking at him or why he gets one of us to look at him. He disappears when you look away and then reappears at random.

Rosier: He's probably dead

Remus: WHAT!?

Rosier: He likes fire

Remus: .....

Severus: *enters the room covered in dirt, leaves, and twigs* Hi

Remus: *panicked* Where the hell have you been?!

Severus: Don't worry about it

Remus: Snape tell-

Severus: *throws a rock at his face*

Mulciber: Let's go eat

Severus & Rosier: Okay

Rule 1: Don't leave Mulciber and Rosier alone together

Remus, holding a grumpy Snape's hand: C'mon we're going to the library

Mulciber & Rosier: We don't wanna go

Remus, sighs: We're only gonna be there for a few minutes, Snape needs to return a book

Mulciber & Rosier: *crosses their arms like stubborn children* No!

Remus: Ugh....fine then stay here....just don't leave this room understood?

Mulciber & Rosier: *nods*

Remus: *leaves*

*A few minutes later*

Remus: *comes back and sees the room a complete mess* What the-

Remus: *notices both Mulciber & Rosier unconscious on the ground* Oh merlin! *rushes over to them*

Remus: Snape go get- *turns around and notices that Snape is gone*

Remus: FUCK!

*after two days with them*

Remus: *dragging them to the Gryffindor commons* Avery!

Avery: *looks up to see a disgruntle Remus forcefully dragging Mulciber, Rosier, & Snape* What-

Remus: Please take them back.....please

Avery: It's been two days

Remus: They're too much

Avery: *chuckles* I know

Remus: How do you deal with them everyday?

Avery: *smiles* Don't worry about it

So after two days Remus goes back to his group of friends and Avery goes back to his. Remus then prays to merlin that he never has to see them again. Plus he forces his friends to keep away from Snape cause he knows that guy carries rocks in his pockets.

[syndromealice-blog]

Why Lily was a bad friend

I always read something like: Lily was a good girl, the best friend, but Snape was a Death Eater and he was obsessed.

I didn’t notice her like a character at all, she was more a neutral to me, because everyone said, that she was so good and so beautiful and so awesome. She was Harry’s mother and I understood that she is an important for Harry and to some people. But then I read The prince’s tale. Oh, well. How can I start? The first thing, that I didn’t like: she used Severus even they were a children. He told everything about Hogwarts and Wizarding World. I think that was a reason why she wanted to be his “friend”. Lily lived with her sister, who hated her and when Lily realized that she is a witch, she was happy, because now Lily has some privileges.

When Lily came to Hogwarts Express, there was a scene:

"You didn't think it was such a freak's school when you wrote to the headmaster and begged him to take you."

Petunia turned scarlet.

"Beg? I didn't beg!"

"I saw his reply. It was very kind."

"You shouldn't have read " whispered Petunia, "that was my private ¨how could you ?"

Lily gave herself away by half-glancing toward where Snape stood nearby. Petunia gasped.

"That boy found it! You and that boy have been sneaking in my room!"

"No" Now Lily was on the defensive. "Severus saw the envelope, and he couldn't believe a Muggle could have contacted Hogwarts, that's all!

Okay, now it seems, like she actually defense Severus, but no. She said, that Severus did that. Severus saw, Severus found... why? She defense herself, not Severus. I had the same situation in childhood and I defended my friend and said it was my fault. Lily literally enjoyed this moment, when she can show to her sister who is a muggle and who is a witch.

Then in Hogwarts:

"...thought we were supposed to be friends?" Snape was saying, "Best friends?"

"We are, Sev, but I don't like some of the people you're hanging round with! I'm sorry, but I detest Avery and Mulciber! Mulciber! What do you see in him, Sev, he's creepy! D'you know what he tried to do to Mary Macdonald the other day?"

Lily had reached a pillar and leaned against it, looking up into the thin, sallow face.

"That was nothing," said Snape. "It was a laugh, that's all"

"It was Dark Magic, and if you think that's funny "

Yeah, Lily, it was a dark magic, but why you wasn’t terrifying, what James and Sirius did to your “best friend”? Or you are so good and so kind only to rich boys? Or maybe you just didn’t care.

Severus asked a logical question:

"What about the stuff Potter and his mates get up to?" demanded Snape. His color rose again as he said it, unable, it seemed, to hold in his resentment.

"What's Potter got to do with anything?" said Lily.

Oh, my God. Of course, you don’t know.

"They sneak out at night. There's something weird about that Lupin. Where does he keep going?"

"He's ill," said Lily. "They say he's ill "

"Every month at the full moon?" said Snape.

"I know your theory," said Lily, and she sounded cold. "Why are you so obsessed with them anyway? Why do you care what they're doing at night?"

He is obsessed? No, Lily, you are obsessed with defense. They bullied him all years in Hogwarts. Of course Severus hate them, it’s a normal reaction. I know, people can say, that Lily was a child, but when I was a fifteen years old, I wasn’t so stupid.

"I'm just trying to show you they're not as wonderful as everyone seems to think they are."

The intensity of his gaze made her blush.

"They don't use Dark Magic, though." She dropped her voice. "And you're being really ungrateful. I heard what happened the other night. You went sneaking down that tunnel by the Whomping Willow, and James Potter saved you from whatever's down there.

“LILY, THEY TRIED TO KILL ME DOWN THERE”

They don’t use Dark Magic though

“LILY THIS MAN ON THE STREET TRYING TO RAPE A BABY”

He don’t use Dark Magic though

"I know James Potter's an arrogant toerag," she said, cutting across Snape. "I don't need you to tell me that. But Mulciber's and Avery's idea of humor is just evil. Evil, Sev. I don't understand how you can be friends with them."

A boy, who bully others not a bad, he is just a toerag. Mmmmmnmmmm

Then was a mudblood scene. She literally smiled, she didn’t help, she said: LeAvE hIm aLoNe. What? If my friend was hung upside down, I certainly wouldn't say leave him alone. I would curse the bully properly and go straight to the headmaster or at least to the teacher. Why Lily didn’t go to the headmaster or to the teachers earlier? She just didn’t care about Severus at all. Because I can’t explain, why fifteen years old girl, who sees every day, that James Potter bully her “best friend” and she does nothing. Then Severus called her a mudblood. I have one theory and I believe that’s a canon. Levicorpus was Severus’s spell. He created it. And why Lily had a successes in potions? I am sure, that Severus gave own book to her and she saw all spells. Levicorpus is non-verbal spell and no one can learn it just by hearing. So, Lily gave book to James. He read this spell and used it. If this is true (at least it seems logical), so Lily is a fucking piece of shit. She gave best friend’s book where were a hints to his bully.

Then Lily was angry and said:

Fine,' she said coolly. 'I won't bother in future. And I'd wash your pants if I were you, Snivellus.'

Later, when Severus try to apologize, she said:

To call me Mudblood? But you call everyone of my birth Mudblood, Severus. Why should I be any different?"

Yeah, girl. Like YOU, rich and beautiful human, said to poor, ugly friend wash your pants. It was a classism.

"It's too late. I've made excuses for you for years. None of my friends can understand why I even talk to you. You and your precious little Death Eater friends ¨ you see, you don't even deny it! You don't even deny that's what you're all aiming to be! You can't wait to join You-Know-Who, can you?"

Okay, if you already saw that he is so bad and awful, why you continued this “friendship” Why? Nobody actually forced you. Why? If he wasn’t good enough, just say: Sorry, but I think, I don’t want to be your friend anymore. That’s it. You literally can do this.

Three years later Lily was married with James, who was “ an arrogant toerag”. Hmmm, okay. Sirius and Remus said, that James didn’t bully anyone but Severus. Lily didn’t know about it. Sorry, I don’t believe.

Results:

Lily didn’t care about Severus and their “friendship”. She gaslighted him all the time. She saw how difficult was his childhood, she saw his abusive father and their life before school. She didn’t help when James bullied him. And no, saying LEAVE HIM ALONE is not a help. If she wanted to help, she did it. Lily used Severus in Potions, before school, when he told everything about Wizarding World and then she gave his book to his bully. She is not a friend. She is just a girl, who wanted something from Severus. And yes, everyone say: IT’S NOT HER JOB, HE BECAME TO A DEATH EATER AND USED DARK MAGIC. She knew that all the time. If this was a problem, she could leave. If she was terrified about death eaters shit, she could talk with him. She knew how difficult life he has. It’s not her job, that’s right. Or maybe she is just a shitty friend?

[spxllcxstxr]

Being Regulus’ S/O and Watching Him be Corrupted by His Family • Headcanon

(GIF not mine)

Warnings: angst! The Dark Mark, Voldemort, the Noble house of black deserves their own warning, death mention, poor regulus

Request: hi beautiful! could i request headcanons for regulus black's s/o? a female one if it's not too much trouble:) could i get some angst with reader saying "All I ever wanted was your approval, because I didn't know I was allowed to want anything else." if that might be too triggering, please feel free to ignore that part. maybe regulus is being "corrupted" by his mother and starting to turn into what she wants him to be? and the reader disapproves and tries to get him to realize that what he's doing is wrong? take care of yourself, luv <3 — @lucellence

A.N: oops I like this, I think. There’s more dialogue than I thought but that’s ok. I hope you guys enjoy! And love you all ❤️

Your boyfriend, Regulus Black, started acting odd after winter break in your fifth year

Sure, he was always soft spoken and a little distant before, but this was different

He wanted to be alone more often and always looked like he never actually slept at night

Avery, Mulciber, and Rosier started hanging around you, Regulus, and Barty in the Great Hall

You could deal with Barty, he and Regulus were friends since they were 11

But the other three?

They were known bullies and blood supremacists

They made you uncomfortable

“Reg can we please go somewhere else?”

“(Y/n)—“

“Please Reg?”

He looks so torn. Glancing between his new friends and the love of his life

“Yeah, ok”

So you go and sit at the top of the Astronomy tower or in the far corner of the library

But he doesn’t look all there

He’s listening to you and smiling at you

But he still looks like he’d rather be with them

And it hurts

He also stops complaining about his mother and his other family members

In fact, you try to talk to him about the many letters he gets from his mother and sometimes even Bellatrix, but he refuses to acknowledge them

He doesn’t open them at the table, he stuffs them in his robes and opens them in private in his own dorm

“They aren’t important, ma colombe (my dove in French according to Google). So don’t worry about it.”

“If they aren’t important, then why are you getting one from Narcissa’s boyfriend as well?”

“He just...wants to get to know the family better, (Y/n). You know he’s planning on proposing to her soon.”

“Yeah...I guess that makes sense.”

But if it was such an innocent letter, why was he hiding it from you?

You notice that Regulus’ eyes never settle

His light grey eyes constantly flick around like he’s suspicious of every little movement

This continues until you have to part ways at the end of the year

He’s not allowed to visit you

You’re not allowed to visit him

“You’ll stay safe, right Reg?”

“You worry about me too much, ma colombe.”

“Well when you live with that Merlin awful mother of yours—“

“Honestly, she’s not that bad, (Y/n).”

“Not that bad? Regulus are you serious?”

“No, I’m Regulus—“

“Ugh, you’re lucky I love you.”

“Indeed I am...” He mumbles under his breath

But the train finally stops, meaning Regulus has to rush off to meet his father in the platform

He presses a quick kiss to your lips before rushing out, barely promising to write over the summer

Regulus writes to you here and there

Not as often as usual

Then, in July, he stops writing altogether

This could be for a number of reasons, honestly, and none of them good

You hope he’s alright

You get one letter late in August

The script is shaky and barely legible

Smudged in certain places like he didn’t wait for the ink to dry before sending it

Dearest (Y/n),

Sorry for the late reply, mother wanted visit our cousins in Germany Bulgaria their estate in France.

I truly wanted to write back, but you know my family. I never had time alone. Always watching, they are.

It sounds like you’ve had an amazing summer, and I can’t wait to see you on the train.

Be careful out there,

RAB

The uneasiness doesn’t go away

Because you know he’s lying

You don’t send a reply, knowing full well that you won’t get another letter from him

You meet him on the Hogwarts Express

The hug is quick and is only with one arm—his left one staying at his side at all times

Much to your dismay

You have to share your compartment

You’re squished next to the window, Regulus next to you, Barty next to him

Avery, Mulciber, and Rosier across from you

You hate every minute of it

They sneer at you the entire time

You study your boyfriend the entire way to school

How he has darker bags under his eyes

And his hair isn’t as neat and proper as usual

His clothes are stiffer and heavier on his smaller frame

Skin paler, eyes duller

He tries to act casual, his left arm just out of the way of the action

But you notice as he sometimes winces during a turn or cradles it closer to his body

You grow suspicious

Let’s flashfowards a bit to....November

It’s the middle of the night and you’re following Regulus down to the library

He’s alone, looking like he doesn’t want to be caught

He quickly starts rummaging through the Restricted Section

Which isn’t bad, everyone sneaks into the Restricted Section at least once in their Hogwarts careers

But then he starts flipping through books about Dark Magic

And the sleeve of his grey jumper starts to roll up

And you see it

The Dark Mark

Black and wriggling against his pale flesh

“What have they done to you, Regulus?”

He whips his head to your frame so fast, his books clatter to the ground

His eyes widen in fear

“(Y/n), I can explain.”

“You can explain?” You’re starting to shout

“(Y/n), let’s take this somewhere else. Please—“

“What? You don’t want me to expose you? Expose you for being a Death—“

“Silencio!”

And suddenly your screams are cut off, you look at him, tears in your eyes

“Oh Salazar, I’m sorry.” He looks like he’s about to cry, pacing in front of you, fingers tightly grasping his hair in panic. “I’m so so sorry, (Y/n)...”

He reaches out to you

“I’m going to take you somewhere, ok? We need to go before we get caught. Please. Please just trust me.”

Reluctantly you follow him to the Room of Requirement

Which has taken the form of a similar library

Shelves lined with books and other magical artifacts

He quickly reverses the spell once the door is closed

“What the hell, Regulus?”

“I—“

“Let me see it.”

You push his sleeve up to once again reveal the inky snake and skull tattoo across his forearm

“Oh Regulus...”

“I couldn’t stop it.” His voice wavers and he’s trying to push back tears. “They brought me and a few others to his manor, and I was forced—“

“We’ll go to Dumbledore—“

“You don’t understand, (Y/n)! I felt him! I felt his cold hands wrapped around my arm! His veins fueled with raw power! Dumbledore won’t be able to stop him. No one will!”

“Please, Reg! You were forced, I’m sure it can be reversed if you just tell the Headmaster now—“

“They’ll kill me, (Y/n)! Don’t you understand? They already suspect my doubt! That’s why I’m being watched. Monitored even at school. One wrong word, one slip of the tongue and I’m dead!”

You wrap your arms around him, careful to avoid his searing arm

He returns the hug, tears dripping into you as he chokes back sobs

“I’m sorry...I’m sorry...I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to do this, Reg. I swear.”

“Of course I have to. I have no other choice.”

“You can be like Sirius! And live with the Potters. Or with me.”

“And when the Death Eaters come hunting you down? When they burn down your house with you inside? Tortured? Screaming in agony? That’ll be my fault.”

He looks absolutely terrified

Eyes wide, lips wobbling

He can barely catch his breath

“No, (Y/n). I can’t do that.”

“You’re not your mother, Regulus. Or Bellatrix, or Narcissa. You can be like Andromeda and Sirius. You can get out. There’s still time.”

“They’re manipulating you, Reg! Corrupting you! You aren’t a bad person or a dark wizard!”

You bring your hands to cup either side of his jaw

Your own tearful eyes lock onto his

“You’re my boyfriend. You’re sweet and caring...and—and...Merlin Reg! I can’t even describe you, you just mean so much to me. I can’t lose you, Reg. No, I refuse to lose you.”

“I—I don’t want to die...” He sobs, so openly and freely

You’ve had enough of this

You take him by the hand and lead him out the door, which is easy in his weakened and fatigued state

The two of you march through the corridors to Dumbledore’s office

He’ll know what to do

•

All Character Taglist: @aspiringsloth20 @amourtentiaa @cherie-draco @mullthingsoverinthehotwater @catching-the-train-to-hogwarts

Regulus Taglist: @lunalovecroft

[chudleycanonficfest]

Stars in the Night Sky

Day 3, Story #2 is by @adenei

Title: Stars in the Night Sky

Author: adenei

Pairing: Jily (James Potter x Lily Evans)

Prompt: Stargazing

Rating: PG

TW: None :)

****************

The castle is peaceful as it nears midnight, a calm surrender to the usual bustling halls during the day. Rounds ended over an hour ago, but the quick pair of footsteps was not rushing through a late shift, they were on their way to the Astronomy Tower to meet their partner and begin Professor Sinistra’s constellation project. 

Allocation of the work was all in the luck of the draw. Where one half of the class drew a name, and the other pulled the astronomical phenomenon they were to study. Lily Evans had pulled the piece of parchment on stars and constellations, and according to the project’s outline, she and her partner would be tracking Orion, Cassiopeia, Gemini, and Canis Major for the next two weeks.

The project left Lily questioning why she chose to pursue the subject after passing her O.W.L.s. Maybe it was because she has always been fascinated by the subject, or maybe it’s for the sole fact that Astronomy is one of the subjects she can discuss with her family since it relates closely to muggle sciences. Regardless, she’s not sure it’s worth the lack of sleep she’s about to endure over the next few weeks.

As Lily climbs the steps of the Astronomy Tower, her heart thunders in her chest with anticipation about who her partner will be. The class is small, with only ten students, but she didn’t bother to hang around and discuss ‘who had who’ at the end of class. She had a meeting with Professor McGonagall about her Head Girl duties and couldn’t be bothered to worry about who her partner was. 

But now, after finding out through Mary that she’s been paired with Remus and Sirius pulled Benjy Fenwick’s name, Lily is nervous. Rumblings at dinner also confirmed that Calliope Forsythe of Hufflepuff was disappointed that she chose Bridgette Marls’s name instead of James’s, leaving Lily sweating the remaining possible outcomes. She doesn’t want to jinx it by getting her hopes up that James may have pulled her name out of the cauldron, and she’s mad at herself for wanting it so desperately.

We already spend enough time together with our Head duties. Plus, we’re friends now, so we can hang out whenever we like...just not alone.

Her last thought is only a partial lie, considering they’re ‘alone’ when creating schedules for rounds, but it never fails that some fifth or sixth-year students are always barging in to use the Prefect’s lounge to study, ruining any potential chance for either to make a move. Even when they’re on rounds, their conversation is constantly interrupted by catching a couple in a broom closet or empty classroom. 

Lily lets out a huff of frustration as she recalls the last time, when she was sure he was about to ask her to Hogsmeade, but then there was a loud clatter from a room up ahead, breaking the moment. So really, it’d be ideal if James were her partner for this project. She’s sick of the song and dance they’ve been playing since the start of term and wants nothing more than to find out whether he still fancies her or not. After all, it’s only a matter of time that some other girl will swoop in, causing his devilishly handsome smile to be trained on them instead.

As Lily approaches the foot of the stairs leading up to the observation room, she checks her watch. 11:59. Right on time. She holds her breath during the entire stair climb, and only when she rounds the corner to the dimly lit area with one singular candle on the table to take notes, does she see him. He’s leaning over the table, the light illuminating his messy black hair as his glasses slip down his nose. The sleeves on the white shirt of his uniform are rolled up to his elbows, exposing the sinewy muscles of his forearm as Lily stands there, getting lost in a daydream that finds those arms wrapped around her body.

The hoot of an owl in the distance snaps her out of her thoughts as she takes a few steps closer.

“I hope you haven’t started without me.” 

Lily’s light chiding gets James’s attention as a wide smirk dons his face. Her insides tremble as her heart pounds faster in her chest.

“How can I get started if I don’t know what we’re supposed to be looking at,” he remarks, eliciting a nervous laugh from her chest.

“Yeah, sorry for not sticking around after class. I had another appointment.”

“Well, I hope my reveal isn’t too much of a shock.”

“Better you than Mulciber or Avery,” she teases. “Why didn’t you ask Professor Sinistra what topic I pulled after you gave your information and got our timetable?”

James walks around the table to join her as she pulls out the project guidelines. She assumes he would have known what they were studying, considering everyone had to check-in and get their schedules from Professor Sinistra. Depending on what the group has chosen, their research times varied.

“Because I thought we were going for the surprise factor,” his cheeky grin matches the lightness in his voice. “Besides, I figured it’d be another excuse to pore over the parchment in close proximity.”

Lily searches the space next to her to see just how close James is before meeting his gaze. She becomes dizzy from the scent of his cologne, with hints of cinnamon and sandalwood invading her sense of smell. If she gives in to temptation now, they won’t accomplish anything on their first night.

Work first, play later.

Strengthening her resolve, Lily makes a swift turn and heads for the telescope. “We’re responsible for tracking the four constellations that are listed on the first page. I’ll see which one I can find first and we’ll go from there. We can take turns tracing, and observing if that’s alright with you.”

“Sure, I’ll get the parchment set up,” James agrees.

Lily’s not sure, but she thinks she may have heard a hint of disappointment in his tone. She pushes the thoughts aside and peers into the massive telescope that’s bolted down in the center of the room. It doesn’t take long to find Jupiter, and from there, she’s able to see a handful of the stars that make up Orion. The belt is the most prevalent as she takes mental notes to transfer on the paper.

Settling into a steady hum of working together, the pair take turns between the telescope and table, making light work of the night’s observations. When Lily checks her watch again, she realizes they’ve finished with time to spare. She wanders over to the railing, and even though she’s spent the better part of the last ninety minutes studying the stars, she finds herself looking up to the sky once more. Only this time, she’s stargazing with only the naked eye. 

She feels James approaching before he arrives at her side, gazing up at the twinkling stars among the backdrop of black and midnight blue.

“We make a pretty good team.” Her voice is soft as it carries through the air between them.

Lily’s exhaustion is prevalent as her eyelids become heavier, but she can’t be bothered to move away from James’s side. Not yet, anyways.

“You haven’t gathered that from our flawless round schedules and seamless Prefect meetings we’ve run so far as Heads?”

Lily can’t help the smile that creeps across her lips. He’s playing into her words in the exact way she was hoping for. “Of course, I’ve noticed. I was just thinking out loud…” she trails off, hoping she’s got him hooked and wanting to know what else she’s about to say.

“About what?” Barely a second passes before the question leaves his mouth.

She drags her teeth over her bottom lip as she looks up at him. Here goes nothing.

“Just about how our teamwork might work in other respects, too.”

His lips part as she hears a sharp intake of breath. “Evans,” he warns as he inches ever closer to her face.

“Potter,” she challenges right back.

They are mere centimeters away from each other now, and it’d be so easy to close the gap between them. James seems to have frozen in front of her as she finds herself leaning up on her tiptoes to press a feather-light kiss to his lips. She pulls away, not wanting to push her luck.

When he doesn’t move after she pulls away, her heart sinks. Lily grabs her bag and turns to head back to the common room. Clearly, I was mistaken.

“Sorry, I just thought—” but she never finished her apology.

Her foot grazes the top step of the staircase before a warm, strong hand wraps around her wrist and pulls her back, where she hits a wall of muscle. Her lips are on his again, and this time he’s kissing her back as her arms snake around his shoulders and her foot lifts off the ground of its own accord. 

James Potter is kissing me!

The moment only lasts a few moments before they pull apart, their breathing heavy under the starry night.

James breaks the silence after a minute. “So, er, Hogsmeade this weekend?”

Lily grins as she backs away slightly, leaving him standing there as she heads toward the stairs for the second time. She flashes a ‘come and get me’ look. 

“I thought you’d never ask.”

[maraudersftw]

Sparks

Did you just kiss me?

And /or

There was never an us.

@constancezin​ thank you for these lovely prompts. Love you! I’m gonna go with the happier one because, have you met me? 

Read on: Ao3, FFnet

It’s the damned Slytherins that finally crack her.

Lily supposes it had to happen at some point—the bastards getting to her, that is—in all her seven years at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, quickly morphing into Hogwarts School of Prejudice and Bigotry now.

She’s on her final round of patrol for the night, strolling through the dungeons beside James Potter, ex-toerag, present Head Boy, constant subject of her musings. He’s trying and failing to recount some prank he’s played on Sirius over the summer break; tears gathering at the corners of hazel eyes, wheezes of laughter breaking through every other phrase.

“And then—fuck, and then the Firewhiskey pours out—his nose, Evans, and I’m howling, of course, but—he’s just going on about how it’s—a waste of good alcohol!”

It’s a ridiculous story. It’s more ridiculous still that she’s doubling over in laughter right alongside him, finding hilarity in something she would’ve undoubtedly labeled obnoxious in her ‘James Potter The Arrogant Prat’ series just over a year ago.

Now, though—well, now Lily’s rather pathetic about how much she fancies the bloke.

When an accidental snort breaks through her laughter a second later, James loses himself in delight, eyes crinkling, body halting in the middle of the corridor to rest his hands against his knees, shoulders shaking with mirth.

Lily thinks she should be embarrassed. Instead, something sickeningly sweet is blossoming near her chest. Pathetic.

“What’s got you in such a good mood?” A disgusted voice floats down from behind them. “The Mudblood finally spread her legs for you, Potter?”

The comment shouldn’t surprise her; hurled insults have long since traveled beyond just the muggle-borns in the castle, targeting anyone who so much as dares raise their voice against all this pure-blood mania. And James—well, he’s never been very low-key about anything in his entire life, strong views on inclusion and support for both magic and non-magic people included.

But even as she knows this, when her eyes travel to find the small group of Slytherins—Mulciber, Avery, Rosier, and Snape—the words still sting. Lily generally manages to brush it away, but with James beside her, with the insinuation somehow debasing her feelings for him and her character in one fell swoop, nonchalance does not come as easily as it usually does.

“Why don’t you lot fuck off? It’s past curfew, and you’ll be losing more than just the forty house points I’m deducting right now.”

“Is she saying something?” Mulciber tilts his head, “I don’t speak Mudblood.”

The other boys titter around him like trolls, and she feels anger pricking her skin. Snape resolutely looks anywhere but at her.

That’s fine, too. She doesn’t speak Death Eater either.

When James finally turns around, his face is a mask of frozen fury. “Leave.”

Lily watches as momentary hesitation flashes over their faces and feels, for some idiotic reason, really proud. It’s not like James is hers, but satisfaction and pride hum happily through every nerve, seemingly unaware of the fact.

“Or what, Potter? Gonna write to Mummy and Daddy to complain? A load of help that’ll do you since they’re dead.”

Surprisingly, she’s the one who fires the first spell, which inevitably leads to a colorful volley of shooting sparks from both sides. Lily’s certain most of what comes from the Slytherins is dark magic, knows that Snape’s definitely are, and it angers her even more that his wand is unfalteringly directed at James and James only.

She shoots a Stupefy right into Mulciber’s gut, but doesn’t take the second to bask in satisfaction as he drops to the floor before she’s shoving James aside, taking over the duel with Snape.

Across from her, the sallow-faced boy—Death Eater, now—freezes.

“What’s the matter?” she can’t help but seethe, firing spell after spell as he pulls up a shield charm, “I know you’ve got a litany of dark magic to use on Mudbloods like me, Severus. Surely, I’m a better target than James—he’s just a measly old blood traitor. I’m the real problem, the real pollutant.”

But he’s nothing if not a hypocrite, so he simply lets out a rage-filled cry that doesn’t even compare to all the anger Lily harbors. “He’s a fucking bastard! You need to fucking open your eyes—”

“Petrificus Totalus!” She yells, finding the right window in between the mad spouting to knock Snape to the floor.

“Fucking brilliant, Evans,” James gapes, moving to stand in front of her. Her heart flutters something horrid when he touches the side of her face gently. “You alright?”

“Yeah,” Lily nods, doing her own assessment of his health, “you?”

“Better than alright!” James grins, “you took down three of them!”

But she didn’t. She only took down two—Mulciber and Snape.

Ice claws over her insides, and she peeks her head around James to find only three prone bodies on the floor. Avery’s missing.

The very next second, she spots him stepping out of an alcove, wand raised. There’s no time to think; Lily slams her body against James’s side, clearing the path so that Avery’s spell misses its target—James’s back—by a wide berth.

It’s a green fucking flash of light.

He was about to fucking kill James.

Lily doesn’t even recognize the feeling that pulses and overflows at the recognition. Anger like she’s never known mixes with an astonishing amount of fear until she’s hurling every ounce of magic inside her at Avery. From hexes to jinxes to advanced curses, she rains hell down on him until he’s just a mangle of green robes on the dungeon floor, skin discolored and dotted with boils and pus and Merlin knows what else.

A cold draft sends shivers running through her in the aftermath.

“Well, now his looks match his personality, at least.”

And that’s when it happens—the cracking of her. James standing there, making light of what happened, making light of the fact that he was almost killed, trying to bring her back into herself, is what does it.

Lily doesn’t even register the slap of her shoes against the stone floors as she strides forward, grabs both sides of his head, and promptly drags James’s face down to hers to kiss him. Her lips slant over his forcefully, desperately, feeling the warm softness of his skin, the way his hands scramble forward to plant themselves on her waist, pull her closer, right against his person. Her mind is abuzz with fear still—a second later, and she would have lost him. She would have lost him.

She kisses him harder, tries to push back the wetness in her eyes.

James is the first one to pull back, breathing harshly. His eyes are wide, bright, lips swollen and hair mussed deliciously. The sight makes her ache.

“Hang on. Wait,” he huffs, hands squeezing her waist. “Is this really happening?”

“What?” she smiles, palm brushing over his cheek.

“Did you just kiss me?” He asks. She laughs. “Lily. Am I dreaming?”

“I’d hope your dreams do not feature a bunch of immobile Slytherins lying on the floor while we make out, James.”

He pulls a face. “I’d forgotten about them.”

Honestly, she had as well. Her lips tingle, and she steps on her tiptoes to leave another lingering kiss on his lips. “Let’s get out of here.”

“And just leave them like this?”

There’s no hesitation. “Yes.”

“Fuck, you’re perfect.”

[masterthespianduchovny]

The Poor Development of the Marauder's Era

I've recently been listening to Binge Mode and, even now, I honestly believe the Marauder's era is some of Rowling’s worst writing of the series. When I say Marauder's Era, I'm simply referring to characters and events pre Harry.

The Marauder's era isn't poorly developed because I didn't like what happened. It's poorly developed because of how Rowling handled the characters, the events she put them in, and the reaction to said events.

As a kid, I respected Lily and thought she could do no wrong. As an adult, I find her decisions questionable. For transparency purposes, I read these books in real time and was a similar age as the characters. So, I don't want to hear anything about me being "unfair." Of all of the Mauraders era kids back then, I was the most generous to Lily. It's only when I reflected more about her role in the series that I realized how lackluster she is as a character and as a friend.

Rowling relies on Lily being seen as the moral compass to signify who and what is right or wrong during this era. The problem with this is that Rowling undermines Lily in the process. Minus being flat out called Mudblood by Snape, she has no proof that Snape has done anything her friends accused him of doing, but she unequivocally views it as the truth. Despite Lily listening to Snape, it's not really in good faith because she already has her mind made up about Snape's guilt.

Now, this is important to note because since Lily hasn't seen any of Snape's alleged bad behavior for herself, why would she definitively accuse him of these things? Lily claims she was in denial about this when she ended their friendship, but it's quite obvious she does believe Snape is guilty.

What makes Lily's beliefs and choosing to side with others over Snape is that none of the Marauders have ever mentioned ONE instant of Snape doing or saying some fucked up shit. As a reminder: THEY HATED HIM. They never mentioned anything about him bullying others, calling muggles mud blood, or any other troubling behavior. It was merely because he existed. They couldn't even tie him to being a Death Eater.

Also, let's consider the fact that kids like Snape have rumors made up about them all of the time. ALL OF THE TIME. Not even Snape's own bullies could attest to Snape doing the things Lily's friends claimed Snape did, yet Lily believed their words?

And, maybe I'm being nitpicky, but the fact that Lily says "my friends" in reference to defending Snape has always rubbed me the wrong way. Snape IS her friend too. Her best friend, in fact. Why wouldn't she have said, "my OTHER friends." My Gryffindor mates or whatever? IMO, that implies that Snape is just some weirdo she talks to and not the person she's known the longest.

HOW ROWLING COULD'VE FIXED THIS:

Have Lily overhear Snape calling one of his peers Mudblood. Have the Marauders be incensed that Snape called someone a mud blood. Have them call out Lily when she tries to intervene on them confronting (confronting NOT bullying) Snape. Hell, even have Snape fucking bully someone.

Because as far as canon goes, Snape was a bystander as death eater wannabes bullied people and presumably did nothing about it. We don't see any of his alleged wrongdoings and the people who hate him can't even recall that this happened.

There shouldn't be an ambiguity or readers relying on the word and opinion of Lily to guide their opinion.

Some may say, "she's only a kid." To this I say, "You're right." Lily was a teen and teens don't always know how to handle complex situations, I will give her the benefit of the doubt. However, this means we shouldn't hold her as the moral standard.

Lily essentially says that the difference between the Marauder's bullying people and the death eater wannabes doing it is dark magic. I'm sorry, but that's weak sauce. Dark magic is such a vague and broad thing depending on what you're talking about, so nah...Also, is there something not dark about James choking Snape with soap? I mean, that could've traumatized Snape to the extent of him being triggered by soap. Isn't that dark?

HOW ROWLING COULD'VE FIXED THAT.

Jut have Lily acknowledge that behaviors by the Marauders and death eater wannabes are both bad, but for different reasons. Problem solved. She can even emphasize that she takes so much issue with Dark Magic due to why it's being used and what it ties into.

We hear how great Lily is and that everyone loves her, yet Harry meets literally NOT ONE FRIEND of Lily's. He meets James' friends and a former teacher of hers. We don't see Lily hanging out with anyone else. We hear examples of Lily feeling sad for people, but no references to her actually helping people or supporting others somehow.

HOW ROWLING COULD'VE FIXED THAT.

Maybe instead of Lily talking about the bad thing Avery and Mulciber did, she could've intervened, even if it was too late, and "saved" Mary. Hell, we could've had Lily hex James rather than just threatening it. I'm sorry, after literally reading the many ways the Golden Trio are there for each other even before big shit started to happen, Lily threatening to hex someone who is actively bullying her friend doesn't cut it.

And give her her own friends for Harry to meet.

Lily is said to be smart and empathic, but how she deals with Snape and his issues don't exactly support this.

HOW ROWLING COULD'VE FIXED IT.

Have Lily genuinely listen to Snape's grievances about the night he was saved. Don't have her be so dismissive about the Lupin thing. Maybe have Snape set up by the Marauders and the big reveal is a flop.

I know Rowling wanted to tackle people having shady pasts and how they can change, but 1. Either she needed to commit to it being a rivalry or 2. She needed to appropriately deal with the bullshit the Marauder's did. Snape is justifiably angry and distrusting of the Marauders due to one almost killing him as a joke and the other publicly humiliating him. This doesn't even account for YEARS of bullying, which remus admitted happened.

We cannot say that bullying is wrong, and then excuse the bullies because they were on the right side of a war.

HOW ROWLING COULD'VE FIXED THIS.

She should've had Remus flat out acknowledge they were wrong for what they did and that there was no excusing it. Then, have Sirius and Remus privately talk about this where Sirius admits it too. OR, despite loving them and his dad, Harry realizes how flawed they were and that their reasoning is simply to protect their dad not necessarily because James grew up. OR Rowling could've not written James and Sirius behaving as psychopaths AS WELL AS show instances of Snape starting shit with them.

SHOW US Snape deliberately starting shit with the Marauders and James trying to apologize. Show us James' growth outside of that. Don't tell us that James is secretly hexing Snape behind Lily's back because it has her looking like a dumb ass.

Also, all of this James stuff is important because Lily ending up with James is such a bad fucking look. IMO, it makes her disgust at his behavior seem performative. It says that she didn't really care about him bullying others, but rather, the perception of her being with someone who bullied others. And, no, having Lily smile as Snape was actively being bullied, and then poverty shaming him isn't a good look.

"BUT, BUT SNAPE CALLED HER A RACIST SLUR!!!"

It doesn't matter how much you want to give your friend the benefit of the doubt, if you believe he's calling others racist slurs, you need to confront it. And, if you believe it to be true, you need to end it. You don't wait until he calls you the slur to say, "hey, maybe he really is this racist person people claim he is."

HOW ROWLING COULD'VE FIXED THIS.

After James saved Snape's life, this is where he could've matured and his big head lessened. He still hexes others, but leaves Snape alone because he realized that they went to far with him even before Sirius' "prank." Instead of James being the antagonizer, it should've been Sirius. Once again, James breaks this up and he and Sirius gets into a small argument. Snape is let down as Lily runs up and Snape says his mud blood remark.

Snape then tries to hex Sirius and James steps in once Snape refuses to stop. It gets out of hand and Snape accidentally harms Lily.

I won't lie, I'm a HUGE Snape fan. However, because of how Rowling handled this era, there are many ambiguous things, situations that don't make any sense, not enough development of characters, etc which undermines the story she tried to tell.

Yes, I do love the series, except I don't like any of the Marauders or Lily. I don't hate Lily, but she grates. Remus really was a coward and irresponsible as hell. Sirius was childish as fuck and, no, him being in prison doesn't excuse or justify all of his behavior. James saved his peer's life, and then publicly humiliated and sexually assaulted him. He didn't stop bullying, he just stopped how he did it.

This doesn't mean I believe that Snape was faultless, but I believe this era was so poorly told that by default, I believe and sympathize with Snape.

Although I believe Rowling wanted readers to do this, I don't think she planned for some readers such as myself to hold the positions we do. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy Snape as is, but I do believe Rowling didn't intend for me to hold the views I do about Lily and the Marauders.

I don't understand her laziness during this era, especially since it's so key in Snape, Lily, and James' stories.

Lastly, she could've developed James and Lily better.

I know she only has so much time, space, pages blah blah blah. However, the best writers find a way to make it work with what they have.

[5thmarauderwrites]

Blurted Confession — Remus Lupin x Slytherin Reader Request.

Requests are: OPEN.

Requested by Anonymous: “could you do a remus x slytherin reader where the marauders are all in class and see her with a hufflepuff friend and he's like... wait she's so NICE actually? just a lot of fluff in general 👉🏻👈🏻“.

Pairing: Remus Lupin x Slytherin!Reader.

Word Count: 1,7K

Warnings: None, it’s fluff all the way.

A/N: This was my first time ever writing for Remus and I loved every second of it because: Remus is baby. [insert here a cute emoji]. Hope you like it, Anon! <3

Remus had the vague notion that Professor McGonagall’s voice was tolling in the background as she explained the fundamentals of the Inanimatus Conjurus Spell to her very attentive students, but he couldn’t bring himself to pay attention to a word she was saying. Instead of being focused on the extremely difficult subject being taught by one of the most strict Professors Hogwarts has ever had, his chocolate eyes were glued to a very interesting and unexpected scene: a y/h/c Slytherin girl he had seen – and not so discreetly stared at – quite some times, mostly in the library, chatting happily with a Hufflepuff girl. And they seemed really close?

The girl had intrigued the boy ever since he first saw her; she was reading one of his favourite muggle stories in the Wooden Bridge, which happened to be one of his favourite places in the castle to get lost inside his books. However, he never really got the chance to talk to her. If he was being honest, talking to her was something he was never entirely sure he wanted to do, since she seemed extremely intimidating; mostly, he knew, because of the house she was sorted into.

Remus was never one to judge a book by its cover; he definitely did not hold any sort of prejudice against all Slytherins. Sure, the house had a few individuals of doubtful character, like Severus Snape, Mulciber and that Avery boy, but then again, they could’ve ended up in any other house. So why was he so intimidated by the fact that Y/N was a Slytherin? Remus knew many of the Slytherins held a profound dislike for the Gryffindors, and maybe, just maybe, that’s what had really refrained him from ever talking to her. Deep down, he was afraid of being rejected by one of the few girls that were actually able to catch his eyes over these five years he had been attending Hogwarts.

“Mr Lupin?” Professor McGonagall called, snapping Remus out of his thoughts. Once he focused on her, he felt a lump starting to form inside his throat as he noticed the clearly displeased glare she was sending him.

“Yes, Professor?” He answered weakly, feeling all the eyes of the room on him.

“Am I boring you with my class?” She asked blatantly, winging her brows.

“No- no,” he muttered, desperately wanting to crawl into a hole, as he hated to be on the spotlight.

“Perhaps you’d rather having Miss L/N explaining today’s lesson to you?” The Professor pursed her lips in annoyance, bending her head to her right. “Since you clearly seem more interested in her than in whatever I have to say.”

Remus felt his cheeks burning as a crimson tone painted his face. “I told you he was looking at her!” He heard James whispering, probably to Sirius.

“Sorry,” Remus was able to mutter after a few seconds.

Minerva McGonagall sent him a last death glare before turning to the blackboard and, waving her wand at it, writing down what she had been explaining since the beginning of the class. Remus quickly grabbed his pieces of parchment and the quill he had packed in his bag this morning and started to furiously take notes, avoiding to glance in Y/N’s direction at all costs.

“Smitten with the little snake, are we Moony?” James Potter wiggled his eyebrows suggestively at his brown-haired friend.

“Oi! Don’t talk about her like that!” Sirius Black scolded him.

Remus and James both snapped his heads towards Sirius and said in unison, “excuse me?”

“Since when do you advocate on behalf of a Slytherin? James asked with an utterly shocked frown.

“She’s friends with Regulus,” the raven-haired boy shrugged. “She always looks out for him, besides she’s the reason why we’re on speaking terms again.”

“Did she help you mend your relationship with your brother?” Remus asked, gobsmacked.

“That and she also helped me when I ran away from home after Walburga had burned my face out of the family tree,” he smiled weakly, his mind clearly traveling back to the dreadful day.

“How so?” James seemed even more shocked than before, if this was even possible.

“Y/N and Regulus were hanging out in his room when my charming mother started to scream at me and command me to leave the house and never come back,” Sirius answered with a grimace. “Y/N came to my room to help me pack my stuff and gave me all the money she had with her, in case I had nowhere to go and needed it.”

“Wow, she’s…” James started, looking for the right words.

“Actually nice,” Remus completed his sentence, completely awestruck.

“She is, Moony,” Sirius smiled at his friend, wrapping his arm around his shoulders. “You and she have a lot in common, actually.”

Remus stared at the table with a lopsided grin after Sirius’ words. Y/N was an honourable young woman who had an incredible amount of kindness inside of her. Stealing a glance in her direction, his chocolate eyes locked with her y/e/c ones and Remus could feel his stomach churning inside of his belly as she sent him a sweet smile.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A week had passed since the Transfiguration class and Remus hadn’t still talked to Y/N, despite Sirius offering again and again to be his wingman and introduce the both of them formally. Even James and Peter tried to boost his confidence by saying she would be crazy not to be interested in him, but the boy still couldn’t help but being afraid of a possible rejection.

Remus kept on studying Y/N and her behaviour for the days to come, noticing how sweet she was to her Hufflepuff friend and how she would stick up for her when some nasty seventh year boys tried to bully the girl. He noticed how she always smiled at herself when reading a book, which he found extremely adorable. He noticed how her eyes would light up when talking about something she was passionate about. He noticed every single little thing about her. What he also noticed is how his heart started to flutter inside his chest at the mere sight of the girl.

“Merlin’s beard! Go talk to her already,” Remus heard the annoyed whisper of Sirius Black in his ear. He had been lost inside his own head for quite a while whilst his eyes involuntarily stared at Y/N from behind a bookshelf.

“What are you doing?” The brown-haired boy hissed with a frown as he turned back to face his friend.

“Helping you with your love life, of course,” Sirius shrugged as if it was obvious.

“I meant here. In the library. You never once stepped a foot in here,” Remus narrowed his eyes.

“Like I said, helping you. You’re looking like a creep hiding in here and staring at her in despair, just go up there and say hi!” Sirius whispered with a poignant urgency, bouncing his arms to reiterate his point.

“I’m not hiding to look at her!” Remus answered exasperatedly. “I was searching for a book!”

“Mate, you weren’t eyeing those books, that’s for sure,” Sirius chuckled as he crossed his arms and leaned against the old bookshelf, his brows defiantly winged.

Remus heaved a sigh as he steadied himself in the bookshelf opposite to Sirius, facing the books disposed ahead of himself and avoiding the gaze of the raven-haired boy, “she seems like a bloody magnet, mate. I… I don’t know, my mind is completely focused on whatever I am doing and next thing I know, my eyes land on her and I just… sort of lose track of time?” He huffed disheartened.

“You really are whipped, aren’t ya?” Sirius shook his head with a smile.

“I guess I am,” Remus nodded, turning his body in Sirius’ direction.

A mischievous smile flickered quickly through Sirius’ lips as he looked behind Remus’ shoulder for a second before turning his attention back to his friend, “tell her that.”

“Tell her what? That I find her extremely kind and sweet? That she is one of the most beautiful girls I’ve ever seen? That I can’t stop thinking about her? That she makes my heart flutter inside my chest? That I’d like to take her out not only in one but in as many dates as she pleased? We don’t even talk to each other. How can I possibly tell her that? Where do I begin from?” Remus blurted out.

“How about by saying hi?” A female voice said from behind him.

Remus widened his eyes in shock as he turned on his heels abruptly and was met by Y/N’s piercing y/e/c eyes. The Slytherin girl had a smile on her face and her lower lip was pressed between her teeth.

“Y/N!” Remus exclaimed, clearly nervous, as his cheeks turned crimson. “Hi!”

“I’ll leave you two to it,” Sirius winked before wiggling his brows and walking away.

“So… Does Remus John Lupin fancy me?” Y/N asked as her own cheeks acquired a pink tone.

“Well, I guess there’s no point in denying when you’ve heard my entire confession…” he started nervously, awkwardly scratching the back of his neck.

“Why would you want to deny it?” Y/N asked and Remus could notice her face falling a little, his heart twinging with hope.

“Because I wouldn’t want you to feel uncomfortable in case you don’t feel the same way,” he shrugged, a sweet smile on his lips.

Y/N’s grin widened as she stared into Remus’ chocolate eyes, “well, I could never feel uncomfortable for being fancied by you, not when I’ve been fancying you myself for the past two years.”

“You fancy me?” Remus asked incredulously. “Me? For the past two years?”

“I thought it was obvious, since I can’t seem to stop staring at you,” she shrugged with a giggle.

“Actually, I’ve had my eyes on you for about the same amount of time,” he chuckled, biting his lower lip as he gazed at the ceiling.

“And instead of talking to each other we just stood there hoping the other would notice our crush…” Y/N stated slowly. “Merlin, we’re such idiots!”

“We really are,” Remus agreed, both staring at each other with lopsided grins. “So… would you, maybe… like to go to Hogsmeade with me next month?” He asked after a moment of a comfortable silence.

“There’s nothing I’d like more,” Y/N answered with a wide smile.

[blitheringmcgonagall]

My Gallant Lad - Part IV

So I got a wonderful anon telling me that this is their favourite Lily Rescues James fic, it’s part of my finished canon marauders fic We Can Be Heroes. But, because it works as a stand alone story, I posted it here in four parts. I hope you enjoy it! Set during the first wizarding war, Lily is very BAMF (but tbh so is James)

TW: angsty and violence

Part I here: After their worst row ever, Lily and James get captured by Voldemort...

Part II here: James tries to save Lily

Part III here: Lily tries to save James

PART IV

(PS this is not pro- Snape at all, quite the opposite, for this to make sense you’ll have to read the other parts, lol!)

Mulciber swallowed.

“Now help me lift Potter, and for fuck’s sake be careful, he’s perilously close to death as it is!” Snape said.

He was so angry his body was shaking in agitation.

Mulciber lifted James’ body as though it were made of glass.

                                       ***

“I’ll take it from here,” Snape ordered.

They were standing underneath the main door of the castle, which led into the courtyard.

“I thought we were bringing Potter and his vile mudblood to the Dark Lord?” Mulciber said, frowning suspiciously.

“Change of plan, Mulciber,” Snape said matter-of-factly. “I want to try and get Evans to talk, that way if Potter snuffs it, we won’t risk being beheaded by him.”

“What do you mean?” Mulciber looked at him in bewilderment. “If you attack Evans and manage to injure her also, we’re doubly fucked!”

“I won’t fuck it up, unlike you dithering idiots I actually know what I’m doing!” Snape says angrily.

Mulciber stared hard at him.

“Are you sure you’re Snape?” he said, narrowing his eyes and reaching for his wand. “You’re acting strangely and I-“

“He’s Snape all right, but under the Imperius Curse,” Lily interjected. “Expelliarmus!”

Mulciber’s wand flew into Lily’s outstretched hand.

“You?” Mulciber seethed. “How in Morgana’s hell did you manage to Imperio him? Last I heard you were wailing painfully awful songs from your cell, giving us all a headache! I thought you’d given up!”

“The great Gaels of Ireland are the men that God made mad, for all their wars are merry, and all their songs are sad,” Lily shrugged. “You just hadn’t experienced the merry part yet!”

“You’re not a man,” Mulciber sneered.

“Ha!” Lily’s face broke into a harsh smile. “What Chesterton didn’t say about Irish women is that when they’re angry, all their wars are won!”

Mulciber stared at her sullenly.

“Not my fault that you consistently underestimate me, Mulciber!” Lily shot back. “You think you’d have learnt by now!”

Mulciber’s face looked like curdled milk.

“Too late,” Lily said. “Obliviate!”

Mulciber’s expression changed slowly to one of utter confusion as he looked between Lily, James and Snape. He hadn’t even seen the spell hit him.

“What happened to him?” he said, scratching behind his ear and staring at James’ body. “Where’s your Head Girl badge? Your uniform?”

“Quidditch injury,” Lily said flatly. “Vicious Slytherin tactics. One hundred points from your House, now back to your common room before I have you expelled!”

“Whaat?” Mulciber said, looking utterly bewildered.

“I’m counting till ten. Ten… nine… eight…” Lily said.

Mulciber stumbled and turned immediately, muttering incoherent protests.

“Not bad, Lily Evans,” Snape whispered with a vicious grin. “Not bad at all.”

                                                  ***

“Outside! Now!” Snape ordered.

Lily Evans remained silent as she walked outside at a steady pace, Snape following her and dragging James Potter’s body along the ancient flagstones.

“Now, it seems that nothing will persuade Dumbledore’s man to reveal what has happened to the Dark Lord’s precious treasure, a book Dumbledore’s men stole! Potter nearly died refusing to tell us. I’m ordering you to tell me, or I’ll make you kill your own husband!” he called out.

“No, I won’t tell you anything,” Lily said with effort.

“Wow! That’s dope!” Villiers whispered loudly to Wilkes.

The two men were sitting on the battlements having a smoke and peering down with interest at the scene unfolding below them.

“Look what Snape is up to! I never thought he was into that shit!” Wilkes replied. “He usually lets us handle that kind of stuff, says it’s boring!”

They looked at each other and grinned.

“Massive!” Villiers giggled, bumping fists with Wilkes.

Snape picked up his wand.

“Last chance, Miss. Evans,” he said, dragging James closer to the middle of the courtyard.

He was holding two other wands in his hand.

“What is going on here?”

Snape whirled around.

Voldemort was standing at the castle gate, and with him Evan Rosier. Voldemort’s wand was pointed at him.

“I am quite simply trying to establish the whereabouts of your missing book, my Lord,” Snape said. “I thought this might work.”

“Rosier here tells me you have been acting exceedingly strange,” Voldemort’s voice was icy. “He thinks you may be under the Imperius Curse.”

“Rosier is neither observant nor intelligent, my Lord,” Snape said stiffly.

“Be that as it may, Severus, you are not yourself, you would not usually dare speak to me with this much courage,” Voldemort replied, stepping forwards.

“My Lord?” Severus replied.

“Let us see what happens, shall we?” Voldemort said, whirling around at the last minute and pointing his wand at Lily.

“Stupefy!” Voldemort said with a lazy swish of his wand.

Lily Evans crumpled to the ground. Snape stood motionless, as though unsure what to do.

“Ah, the spell fades, I see. I had hoped you would not be so easily overcome by it. You disappoint me, Severus, I thought you were stronger than that. I thought you knew the mudblood well enough to watch out for any tricks she might play? Or were you too enticed by her beauty to focus on doing your job properly?” Voldemort spat out. “You shall pay for this mistake! And the object of your affections will most definitely pay.”

“I’m afraid I underestimated the mudblood,” Snape said, with a condescending smirk at the Dark Lord. “I don’t know her as well as I thought I did. She should perhaps have been sorted into Slytherin. It appears that Lily Evans is a devious little bitch!”

Startling emerald eyes glared at Voldemort from Snape’s face. As the wheels in Voldemort’s mind whirled, Snape removed a leather bracelet from his wrist and tapped it, revealing a large glittering brass key.

“Póg mo thóin, Riddle!” he said, flicking the V at Voldemort (who looked momentarily stunned) as he grabbed hold of James’ arm and apparated into thin air.

“I don’t get it,” Rosier said, looking at Voldemort and rubbing his forehead as though in pain. “Was that Snape? No, hang on.. what was..?”

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” roared Voldemort, raising his head as his blood-curdling screams carried over the courtyard and into the surrounding forest.

He kicked out viciously at Rosier’s leg sending him hopping around in circles howling with pain. A family of carrion crows, disturbed by the commotion, flapped and squawked upwards from the turrets and battlements.

“Which one of you is the imbecile who allowed Lily Evans to escape?” he screamed at Rosier. “Why did none of you stop her?”

Villiers and Wilkes ducked down behind the walls of the battlements, grimacing.

A splash of white bird dropping landed on Voldemort’s nose. Rosier stared at him.

“You have some…” he said, pointing to Voldemort’s face. “Just there?”

Voldemort looked ready to kill him.

“If you don’t permanently dispose of this group of crows by Salazar’s soul, I will feed you to them myself!” he shouted wildly, waving his wand at Rosier, and rubbing his face furiously with the back of his sleeve.

“A murder of crows, not a group, but whatever,” Rosier muttered to himself, looking peeved, as he aimed Avada Kedavras at the screeching birds.

Voldemort walked over to the body of Lily Evans and stared at the darkening hair and sallower skin, Snape’s eyes looking up at him.

“Legilimens!” he intoned.

The memory was tampered with, powerfully, so that he was unable to see some of the earlier incidents, but he could see the conversation between “Snape” and Avery, Fuck Voldemort, I hate that bastard! Avery running off to hide from him. Seething with rage, he grabbed Rosier’s arm and touched his dark mark.

He watched as all his followers apparated around him, all except Snape who lay half-stunned on the ground, and Hugo Avery.

“Find Avery, bring him to me, now, or you all die!” he hissed, the red veins in his sclera protruding menacingly. “Nooooowwwww!!!!”

                                                  ***

 “I don’t know what happened,” Frank said, his croaky voice difficult to understand in between coughing fits.

“He needs to come with me to the Infirmatory,” Poppy interrupted, looking at Dumbledore and pointing towards the door.

Frank continued coughing and shook his head forcefully.

“We were ambushed… they were waiting for us… they wanted to get Black and Lupin,” he wheezed. “They got Lily and James… I wanted to create a diversion but before I could move, one of them released noxious fumes, no doubt to catch any other Order members, I was knocked out cold… I fell backwards and the thicket hid me from sight… woke up freezing cold a short while ago… I couldn’t find any trace of them whatsoever. I only got back just as Lily apparated here with James, he looks bad.”

The ancient double door burst open as he spoke, and Sirius Black stormed inside, his black jeans soaking wet, his leather jacket still in his hands, closely followed by a haggard-looking Remus Lupin.

“We came as soon as we got your owl. Where are they?” he roared, going straight up to Frank and grabbing hold of his collar urgently. “Where the fuck are they? Tell me!”

Remus found himself unable to utter a single word.

                                                     ***

The door of the Infirmary flew open, Sirius breathless as though he had just sprinted up five flights of stairs (which he had). He looked at Lily and seeing the pain and fear in her eyes, he forced himself to look at James lying unconscious in the bed behind her - it didn’t look like his brother, the bruised and battered body covered in what he immediately recognised as myriad curses, his usually tanned skin a deathly pale colour. He looked already dead. He looked back at Lily, the darkness under her eyes, her quivering lips.

“Lily,” he tried to say her name but no words came out, caught in his throat.

“I know, sweetie,” Lily’s voice a hoarse whisper.

Then they flung their arms around each other, gripping on for dear life. Sirius felt her chest heave and held her even closer as her quiet sobs filled the silent room, shattering his heart.

“I’m so sorry,” he whispered back, his breath still caught inside his chest, trapped.

What could he say, hearing her heartbroken sounds?

“We won’t... we shan’t let him die,” he managed to say eventually, shutting his eyes tightly to stop himself breaking down. He moved to take both her hands in his own, looking down at her with tears in his eyes.

He didn’t even know was he trying to comfort her or was he trying to comfort himself.

“I… I used an Unforgivable, Sirius,” Lily said eventually, keeping her head down.

“I would have sprained my wrist throwing Unforgivables at the bastards!” Sirius said. “I wish I could have done it for you.”

He had badness in him already, let him hold it for all of them.

It should have been him. He should have been there instead of James, instead of Lily.

“I’m glad you didn’t,” Lily’s voice shook. “I did it to save James… it felt wrong, Sirius, it is wrong and disgusting, but I know I’d do it again to save him. Am I a bad person, Sirius? I.. I saw what they did to him, I wanted them all dead… I thought about it... I wanted to. I don’t want to become like them, Sirius, but I wanted to kill them, so badly!”

“Lily, you didn’t kill them. You could have tried to, but you didn’t. You saved James. Merlin, you saved my brother, the only brother I have left, I can never thank you enough,” Sirius’ voice broke.

He wondered what he would have done in her place.

“It was Snape, he wanted to save me, but I had to find James, I couldn’t… he hurt James, I hate him for it,” Lily said desperately, squeezing Sirius’ arms.

“Fuck that creepy bastard!” Sirius said.

“What if Voldemort kills him? What if he dies? It will be my fault!” Lily whispered. “I hate him so much, but I don’t want to get him killed. I wouldn’t care if he died in battle, not now, not after everything he’s done to James! But being tortured and killed for trying to save me? I don’t want that, am I mad?”

“You had to,“ Sirius said, gripping her tightly. “You had to try to save James. You couldn’t leave with Snape, you know that would have been wrong! You are not to blame for anything Voldemort does!”

“I need James too, Sirius, he doesn’t see that, he thought I could manage without him, he’s so stupid, such a stupid, darling, beautiful man,” Lily stopped, her hand over her mouth.

“He can’t die, Poppy won’t let him die,” Sirius whispered back.

Lily nodded, still crying. He saw her sway and grabbed hold of her shoulders.

“Merlin Lily,” he said anxiously. “Sit down immediately! Are you alright? Are you hurt? Do you need Poppy? Will I get-“

“ No, please, Sirius, I didn’t get hurt, James-“ she stopped, unable to continue, and bringing her hand up to her mouth again.

He didn’t think he could handle hearing what had happened.

“Hush, Lily, you’re both safe now,” he heard himself say.

“He... I couldn’t... I tried...” she said. She closed her eyes and swayed again, sitting down suddenly and placing her head between her knees.

“I need some water, and something to eat,” she said, sounding suddenly anxious as her almond shaped clear eyes searched Sirius’ for reassurance.

“I... Merlin, yes of course, Darling, let me get that for you!” Sirius said, relief blossoming at some small task he could do to help. “Do you want a firewhisky instead?”

“No! I can’t drink now I’m ... I’m a bit dehydrated Sirius, I better stick to the water,” Lily said, placing her hand over her lower abdomen in a protective gesture.

“Yes of course,” Sirius said feverishly, throwing his leather jacket on.

“I’ll get it,” Dearborn was standing in the doorway looking at Lily uncomfortably.

“Lily, I know you already had a debriefing with Professor Dumbledore, but he was wondering if you wouldn’t mind answering a few more-“ he continued.

“No!”

Both Lily and Sirius spoke at once.

“Not now, my husband needs me here, Dumbledore can wait,” Lily said, staring at Dearborn with a hostile expression as she swiped at her red eyes furiously.

“Tell him to go fuck himself,” Sirius growled.

Dearborn nodded, recognising defeat.

“You get some food and water for Lily, Caradoc, I’ll tell Dumbledore,” Remus said. Remus stood quietly behind Dearborn, a grim look, no obvious emotions displayed on his tired face.

“Righto,” Dearborn nodded reluctantly.

“Hurry up,” Remus ordered. “We don’t want Poppy to end up with another patient.”

“Righto,” Dearborn said, looking relieved to have an excuse to leave.

                                                      *** “You wanted to speak with me, Mr. Lupin?” Dumbledore said, gesturing vaguely towards the chair in front of him.

Remus sat down. The silence made him nervous.

“You feel guilty for swapping your week on call with the Potters. You want to make sure that your friends are protected from danger as much as possible from now on?”

Remus felt his cheeks flush. He nodded, feeling even worse.

“Good,” Dumbledore said. “I can see why you’d think that way.”

Remus swallowed. Dumbledore blamed him too? He wanted to crawl under the floorboards never to re-emerge.

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly, looking down, unable to meet the Professor’s gaze. “I should have stayed…”

“That’s quite alright, Remus, these things happen, and we have to learn from them,” Dumbledore said.

Remus felt himself slide further down the chair. He wanted to cry. It reminded him of The Prank at the end of Fifth Year. It should have been him. He should have insisted Sirius go with someone else. He felt personally responsible for what had happened, and if James died because of him… if James died…

“What can I do, Sir?” Remus whispered hoarsely. “Tell me there is something I can do to help!”

He looked up and caught Dumbledore looking at him keenly, with an astute gaze.

“Of course there is something you can do to help, Remus,” Dumbledore said, steepling his hands together. “It will be dangerous though, the most dangerous mission I have ever given any member of the Order.”

Remus nodded dumbly.

“It is also top secret. You must not discuss this information with a single soul,” Dumbledore said, his blue eyes assessing Remus coolly. “Not the Marauders, not Lily Potter, especially not Sirius Black. Understood?”

“Yes, Sir,” Remus said, sitting up straighter. “You can trust me.”

“I hope so, Remus,” Dumbledore said. “Most people wouldn’t.”

Remus froze, taken aback.

“I…” he stuttered.

“Luckily for you, I am not most people, Mr. Lupin,” Dumbledore smiled pleasantly. “Lemon sherbet?”

Somewhere in the back of Remus’ mind the words you bastard and what the fuck presented themselves as appropriate responses.

He declined politely.

“I have a singularly important and quite unusual mission, and it seems to me that you are the perfect candidate to volunteer for it,” Dumbledore said, sucking loudly on the muggle sweet and leaning back into his chair.

Somehow the wizard’s eyes seemed beadier in this light. Remus waited.

“I will of course understand if you turn down this opportunity, Remus, that you may be too frightened to go,” Dumbledore said. “Other Order members may be more-“

Remus’ jaw tightened. The words you bastard and what the fuck once more presented themselves as appropriate responses.

“Other Order members have no idea how little I fear most things,” Remus said, his eyes narrowing.

“Yes, of course, Remus, I am well aware that compared to most-“ Dumbledore said, with a placating raise of his palms.

“What mission?” Remus asked.

“A mission to infiltrate Fenrir Greyback’s werewolf pack. I am aware you have already made his acquaintance,” Dumbledore said. “To see if they can be persuaded to abandon their leader and join our side in the war. And to spy on them, at any rate.”

Remus felt a cold shiver of dread run down his spine. His old Headmaster couldn’t be serious, surely. That was a hopeless mission, a pointless waste of life, a …

Greyback…

An ear-splitting scream of terror, his own. Rabid eyes. Massive yellow canines lunging towards him, saliva dripping off them. Laughter and howling.

“Tell your Daddy I said hello!”

A tearing sensation as huge teeth sank into his hip. Another ear-splitting scream, this time of pain…

He felt his hands tremble and gripped the edges of the armchair in agitation.

“If you’d rather not, I am sure I can persuade another member of the Order to pretend to be a werewolf. With some clever Transfiguration spells, which many of our members are particularly gifted at, especially your own friends-“ Dumbledore said.

“No!” Remus said, standing up suddenly and staring hard at the other man, his breathing erratic. “Merlin no! You have no idea…”

His voice trailed off again, his heart hammering wildly against his ribcage.

“So, Mr. Lupin, you don’t feel you can bring yourself to-“ Dumbledore said.

“No!” Remus practically shouted. “I’ll do it! Don’t even think about asking anyone else… I’ll do it, alright?”

“I see,” Dumbledore smiled kindly again. “My deepest apologies Remus, how very brave of you. I should never have doubted you.”

Remus bit the side of his lip. This was akin to agreeing to a suicide mission. Any sane individual would have refused to accept the offer. But surely Dumbledore had guessed he would never allow any of his friends or colleagues to go instead of him, to risk being turned? The bastard must have known all along. Yet he owed so much to this old man, this powerful wizard, the one they were all relying on to beat Voldemort and to win this war. The one who had given him a chance. Who had risked his reputation by allowing him into Hogwarts. Who had not expelled him after the disastrous Prank in Fifth Year. Maybe he was being unkind and unfair to the man. Perhaps this mission was genuinely important?

“No need to apologise, Sir,” Remus said with a small smile, extending his hand out.

“Thank you, Remus,” Dumbledore said, shaking his hand warmly. “I do appreciate your help in this war. I shall contact you shortly with more information about this entire affair. Please remember to keep this top secret.”

“Yes, Sir,” said Remus.

                                           ***

He opened the door quietly. The room was dimly lit by the fire and the large candles on either side of the infirmary bed. James looked the same, somewhere between life and death. Lily was sitting on a chair, her head lying on the bed beside him, still fully clothed, the dark shadows under her eyes more pronounced in this light. She was holding James’ hand. Sirius was nowhere to be seen, but at the foot of the bed, on top of the carefully folded blankets lay Padfoot. He was whimpering in his sleep. The shaggy dog opened his eyes briefly, fixing Remus with his mournful grey eyes.

“Sleep, Padfoot,” Remus said quietly. “I’ll stay up. I’ll call Poppy if there’s any change. There’s nothing more we can do.”

Padfoot yelped quietly, turning to look at Lily and James and then looked back at Remus and whined. He was looking at Remus accusingly. Where had he disappeared off to, why hadn’t he comforted Lily? Did he not care?

“I’m sorry,” Remus said.

It sounded curt. Inadequate.

What more could he say?

Padfoot whined once again, dropping his head into his paws, looking dejected. Remus sat on the ground, his head in his hands. He could go over, talk to Sirius, but his boyfriend always knew if he was hiding anything from him, and he was too tired to make up an excuse for what had just happened. Too tired, too traumatised, too selfish…

He stayed where he was.

Padfoot slept fitfully, beset by nightmares. Remus did not sleep a wink. He did not allow himself to sleep. The fear of nightmares kept him awake, as though he were four years old again. Besides, he did not deserve to sleep.

                                          ***

PS Póg mo thóin - kiss my ass in Irish

PS To find out if James is okay, and if Lily is in fact pregnant and if yes, what happens next etc, I’m afraid you’ll have to keep reading  We Can Be Heroes. If you just want to read on, it’s from Chapter 45.

 If you want, I can post more stand alones (Harry’s birth? the Jily engagement? Jily Wedding? Wolfstar first kiss etc??or the next part but it just leads into more stuff!)