#and he tells you stories so fantastic and strange and he is way too serious sometimes but when he laughs you wonder what it would be like

[dogearedheart]

guys is it weird to call a guy you never even met after your girlfriend broke up with you?

[flurrys-creativity]

Panacea

Panacea - a solution for all problems

Pairing: Bang Chan (Skz) x Fem!Reader x Han Jisung (Skz) x Kim Seungmin (Skz); Genre: Fae AU, Romance, Smut, Angst; Rating: nsfw, MDNI, 18+; Warnings: Fae!Chan, Fae!Seungmin, Fae!Jisung, Human!Reader, being hunted/chased, usage of magic, supernatural powers, kissing, SMUT -> penetrative sex, unprotected sex, biting/marking, predator/prey dynamics, blood play, knife play, magic manipulation, magic play, masturbation, foursome, anal (f receiving), double penetration, manhandling, slight free use, creampie, multiple orgasms, oral (m and f receiving), slight overstimulation, suggestive flirting; Wordcount: 6.901

Collab: Thrill of the Hunt by @cultofdionysusnet (if you have time check out the others stories by all these fantastic writers)

Summary: As Chan teaches younger Fae the rules of The Hunt he had asked you to assist him. You willingly agreed but soon enough you questioned your choice as you got chased through the night by not one but two Fae.

A/N: This is the second entry for the collab! Due to some health issues (a.k.a my wrists were not functioning) it came out later than intended. Thanks to @sanjoongie for being so patient with me AND hyping me up as well as brainstorming when I got stuck! Also @potatomountain for some very intriguing ideas that got incorporated here as well! Also a slight warning: This might be intense for some.. so proceed with caution.

Gentle shaking pulled you out of your slumber. You blinked several times before your eyes finally focused on someone crouching right before your bed.

“Aren’t you adorable, babygirl”, Chan chuckled softly as he tilted his head and looked at you expectantly. He waited a moment longer for you to wake up completely.

“Is it time?” You asked and rubbed over your eyes with the palm of your hand. You sat up on your bed and swung your legs over the edge, stretching your stiff limbs.

Chan nodded, his expression turning serious all of a sudden. “Almost. Do you want me to run you through everything once more?”

You hummed quietly and leaned forward, wrapping your arms around his neck - careful of his dark wings - and pressing yourself against his body for some comfort.

It was strange to think a Fae, who found you wandering through their realm after you got pulled through a portal, was the source of your comfort. Yet, you depended on Chan wholeheartedly - not even considering returning to your own world.

Chan chuckled again and wrapped his own, strong arms around your middle. He kissed your temple. “You’re way too good for me, babygirl.”

You shook your head and mumbled into his shoulder: “Am not.”

He pulled you closer against his body. “Oh, you are. You’re such a blessing. Especially for agreeing to help me teach these young Fae! I know I can trust you, so not having to resort to a human I don’t know is extremely helpful.” His hands wandered down your sides, caressing you ever so gently. “There’s just one downside to this.”

“There is?” You questioned him, a tinge of nervousness washing over your being.

“You won’t be with me all the time!”

You snorted and rubbed your face further into Chan’s body, trying to hide from his cheesy-ness. “But you’ll be with me all the time, won’t you?”

“Right. Okay, babygirl, let us go through this one last time. For my own sanity, yeah?” Chan gently pushed you away from his body, ignoring your soft whining. “Tell me what you’re supposed to do.”

You inhaled deeply and closed your eyes, searching for your memories of what Chan had told you. “I’m supposed to leave the town the second I step out of the door.”

“And then what?”

“Hide and sneak around to make it as hard for your students as possible.”

Chan snickered and patted your head. “Yeah, we wouldn’t want them to have it easy. Jisung and Seungmin are both from different courts though. Do you remember what that means?”

You sighed and pursed your lips, looking at Chan with an expression that told him he didn’t need to act like you were a dumb little child. You knew that each of the three courts had different approaches when it came to humans and The Hunt.

While the court - Latha - where Chan came from saw humans somewhat as equals and treated them with respect, the other two courts didn’t have the same standards. 

A shiver ran down your back when your memories travelled to the rare occasions where you met full fledged Fae from other courts. If you added the horror stories that got murmured around in the dark, you truly got nervous about the whole ordeal again.

“Could you mark me again?” You asked and looked hopeful towards Chan, batting your eyelashes and jutting your lower lip out to make your request especially appealing to him.

Chan tilted his head and brushed some hair away from your face. “I just marked you a while ago. You can still see it.” He glanced down at your throat - a thumb brushing over the healing bite mark. “Even if it was healed, the other Fae would know you belong to me.”

“Please”, you begged him and pressed yourself closer against his body. “It gives me a sense of safety even when I can’t see you.”

He chuckled softly and nosed along your jawline, whispering sweet nothings against your skin while his hands travelled along your body. 

You shivered again - this time from the anticipation of pleasure. You tilted your head to the side, giving Chan better access to your throat. Your chest moved up and down from your trembling breaths and you barely kept your eyes open to watch him.

“Aren’t you the sweetest little human for me”, Chan mumbled and pushed you down on the mattress again, crawling right over you until his strong body captured you beneath him. His black, feathery wings added to the feeling of being caged in, some of the feathers brushing along your bare legs.

One of Chan’s hands wandered between your legs, grabbing the flesh there and pushing your thighs apart so he could slot himself between them. He rolled his hips into yours, grinning mischievously upon hearing your needy whimpers.

You didn’t need to beg much for him, sensing he was just as eager to be inside you as you. 

Chan pushed his own clothes away and ripped at the sheets that covered half of your form. With a hard thrust he pushed inside of you, keeping a relentless pace while he fucked you.

You weren’t even able to breathe properly, gasping for air like a fish out of water. All your senses got consumed by Chan’s dominating presence and you easily submitted to him, willingly doing anything he wished for. 

“You’re so fucking gorgeous”, he grunted out while kissing along your neck. Chan littered your sensitive skin with licks and kisses, wanting to soothe it from the oncoming pain. 

“Please.”

Chan kissed your skin one last time before he opened his mouth, revealing his teeth. They were sharper than a normal human’s teeth. Though that didn’t make the bite less painful - just easier for him to bite through your skin.

You groaned through clenched jaws, trying to focus on the pleasure surging inside of your body that formed a knot in your lower stomach. The tingles spread further through every nerve until it consumed you completely. With an outcry you came. You barely registered how Chan helped you through your high and came soon after as well.

“As much as I’d love to stay in bed with you and cuddle you until you can’t stand my presence, we have to move.” He sighed deeply and pushed himself up. His wings ruffled nervously behind him while he helped you up too and walked you over to a small washing basin. 

Once you were cleaned up and ready to leave, you opened the door to Chan’s home. You stood on the threshold and looked outside, your heart clenching painfully at the thought of leaving your only source of comfort for who knows how long. 

Chan stepped behind you and wrapped his strong arms around your form, pulling you against his chest and resting his chin on your shoulder. “There won’t be a second where you’re alone out there. I’m with you for every step of this adventure.”

You relaxed slightly, new determination settling inside your mind. You turned around in his hold and brushed your fingertips over his face with the softest smile. “I trust you nothing bad will happen to me. I know you’ll step in.”

Chan nodded along. His eyes implored yours yet again, trying to find a hint of discomfort in them but as you were set on helping him, he found none. With yet another sigh Chan kissed you one last time before he let you go.

You straightened your shoulders and followed the path, which led you out of town. At the first cross section you decided to head towards the forests, hoping underneath its canopy you’d find more than enough hidden spots when you had to rest.

You jumped in surprise when a large raven cawed above your head. Its shadow rushed over your figure as it circled you several times. 

You bit on your lower lip, trying to suppress the grin spreading on your face. “So he’s already shadowing me”, you mumbled before you picked up your pace again. 

Soon enough you vanished between the trees, following the path deeper into the thick forest until the sunshine nearly vanished completely. You turned around your own axis, making sure you’ve gone far enough, before you left the road and carefully moved through the bushes.

You dug underneath low hanging branches and climbed over protruding roots. Every now and then you saw Chan’s raven flying from one tree to another, its dark gleaming eyes intently following your every move.

The first night came and went by with nothing happening. Just like several more nights. 

And it made you nervous.

You knew you were being hunted but so far you hadn’t noticed any sign of your pursuers. Except for Chan’s raven, who followed you everywhere.

On your fifth day of running and hiding you finally approached a clearing in the middle of the forest. Before you tried to stay away from them, fearing you’d be easily spotted from the air but you needed something that only grew there.

With careful steps you walked closer to the sunlit area. Your eyes darted around nervously and your ears were strained beyond comparison, just to make sure you’d hear even the smallest sound. You looked around over and over again, halting every three steps until you finally reached a patch full of clover.

You leaned down in slow motion, eyes still darting around the area. Only when your hands touched the soft ground did your focus shift on the clover beneath you. Hurriedly you brushed your fingers through them, searching for a four-leaved one. 

Unbeknownst to you, you already got watched - not just from Chan’s raven.

Seungmin sat on top of a large branch of an nearing tree, using his glamour to merge with his surroundings. He actually had no interest in The Hunt nor in humans in general. It annoyed him being forced to learn the ways of The Hunt and participate in a mock one. Yet when he observed you, his interest peaked.

You cheered quietly and held a four-leaved clover up in the air, squinting your eyes against the bright sky. You hoped one would be enough for the trick Chan told you about. Ever so quietly you mumbled your thanks, knowing how peculiar Fae were about nature and how you interacted with it. You lowered your arm again and stared at the clover in your hand for a second longer before you squashed it between your fingers.

Seungmin stiffened, his eyes narrowing as he watched you rub the green paste across your eyelids now.

You blinked several times, getting used to the feeling of the smashed clover on your eyelids. Slowly you turned your head and took your surroundings in once more. Your eyes widened in surprise when you saw the dryads - half tree, half Fae watching you with great interest. 

While they meant no harm for you, it still felt unsettling knowing you’ve been running around the forest for days without having seen them before just now.

A movement at the corner of your vision caught your attention and your head snapped into the direction, seeing a Fae standing atop a tree and staring at you with narrowed eyes.

You jumped up without looking away, fearing the second you’d lose eye contact you’d be captured in an instant. Only when you reached the edge of the forest again, you turned on your heels and rushed away. While it was wishful thinking the thick canopy would keep the Fae away, you still hoped it helped your case.

Seungmin silently watched you disappear between the trees. He pursed his lips in amusement, thinking The Hunt - even a mock one - might be more interesting than he thought.

You ran until you couldn’t anymore, crashing down on the forest ground. Your body heaved for oxygen, trembling like a leaf in the wind. Your ears rang loudly and your mind felt fuzzy from the sudden exercise. 

With your last strength you pulled your body to a protruding root, half crawling underneath it in hopes of staying hidden until you regained some of your strength again. You breathed deeply and closed your eyes, trying to ignore the feeling of being watched. You wanted to tell yourself it was only Chan’s raven that watched you but the second you used the paste you just knew you felt more than one pair of eyes on your form.

Once you opened your eyes again a lot of time must have passed. The sun wasn’t up anymore - the limited light within the forest was gone now that it seemed to be the middle of the night. Even though there should be moonlight, it wasn’t strong enough to shine through the thick canopy.

To your surprise though you noticed a bluish glow to your side. You pushed yourself up into a crouching position, slowly looking over the large root you hid behind.

Your mouth formed a natural o upon seeing the blue glowing orb floating in the middle of the forest. You looked around, trying to see anything in the dark despite the orb.

At the back of your mind you remembered Chan calling them Devas. At least you thought them to be that since Will O’Wisps usually appear around water and not in the middle of forests. Either way these ethereal beings guided humans through dangerous areas, aiding them in need.

You finally stood up completely. While you still looked around warily, something inside of you begged you to follow the orb, hoping they would guide you to Chan who you missed dearly.

Whenever you came closer to the Devas they disappeared into thin air, only to reappear a little further down - naturally guiding you through the dark forest.

Soon enough you heard the soft splashing of water ahead of you. Getting closer to what seemed to be another clearing with a small creek running through it, you slowed down again. The Devas danced around the clearing, beckoning you to step out as well.

Yet, you stayed behind a tree. You scanned the area slowly. If it had been Chan guiding you there, he wouldn’t have hidden from your sight. A shiver ran down your spine as the fear of having run straight into a trap crawled over your skin.

“You don’t seem as dumb as I thought a human to be.”

You nearly yelped from the sudden voice behind you, if you hadn’t slapped your hand over your mouth. Your heart raced inside your ribcage and you turned around almost mechanically until your gaze met the shadowy figure of the same Fae from earlier.

“Still dumb”, he said - eyeing you from head to toe and back again - “but not as dumb as what I heard humans to be.” He gracefully walked around you, his gaze never leaving your form.

Somehow you felt naked under his watchful eyes despite wearing several layers of clothes. You pressed yourself against the bark of the tree. So far you couldn’t tell from which court this Fae was, making it difficult for you to calculate your next move.

“Why don’t we have a chat over something to drink?”

“I neither drink nor eat what a Fae offers me.”

His eyes widened in surprise, before he composed himself again with a chuckle. “Chan taught you well, I see.” He shook his head and stepped away from you, walking onto the clearing and into the moonlight. “Of course he wouldn’t make it easy for us.”

You watched him silently. His translucent wings were folded on his back, slightly shimmering in the blue light of the moon. He didn’t appear threatening and you wondered what exactly his goal was with him talking so casually.

“I assume you haven’t met Ji yet.” He turned back to you, his eyes taking in your reaction closely. “Otherwise you wouldn’t be that calm around me.”

“So you’re from Ciaradh.”

His eyes twinkled in delight before he bowed exaggeratingly. “You can call me Min. At your service.”

You narrowed your eyes and scoffed playfully. “If you’d truly be at my service you would have told me your whole name.”

He laughed out and placed his hands behind his back, tilting his head as he stared at you. “You know quite a lot about our species for a human.”

Feeling bold, you stepped out from behind the tree and followed the Fae onto the clearing. “I should be upset about you mocking my species but I do get why you’d think all humans would be horrendously stupid.” Your eyes widened momentarily as you thought back to your time amongst humans - the stupidity unfathomable.

Seungmin walked around you, his movements almost resembling steps of an intricate dance. He kept you talking, listening intently to every word you said. While you lacked the grace of a Fae you didn’t trample around the area like a newborn troll - much like lots of other humans had done before.

Even though he didn’t have much experience with humans, not until he had reached a specific age to get one on his own, Seungmin had observed them and the Fae responsible - mostly the Fae responsible, which made him question why they’d go through such a hassle of dealing with almost primitive beings.

You followed him further onto the clearing, unconsciously mindful where you stepped. Somehow you imitated his movements, joining him in the silent dance. Entranced by his hidden curiosity you forgot about The Hunt, your movements pulling you closer and closer towards him.

The Devas floated around the clearing themselves, making the situation even more dreamlike than it already felt. Your eyes searched his own, trying to figure out his intentions but to no avail.

“How did you end up in Chan’s care?” Seungmin asked, getting closer to you. If he’d outstretched his arms he’d be able to grab you and pull you in but the fact you willingly got closer yourself made his heart soar from excitement. He didn’t use a lot of magic, guessing you’d pick that up easily from having lived with Chan for quite some time, but he used enough to pull you further into his enchantment.

You laughed in embarrassment and turned your head away, trying to hide it from the Fae. “I wanted to be beautiful”, you sighed and shook your head from your own naivete. “There was a rumour about a stream in Scotland. If you’d keep your face under water for seven seconds you’d be graced with ethereal beauty from the Fae.”

Seungmin stopped in his movements, watching you silently as you turned back to him. A hidden sadness danced in your eyes. “I slipped when I wanted to try it and fell into the stream, getting pulled through a portal into your realm.”

“Why would you try it? You are beautiful.” You were close enough now for him to brush the back of his fingers over your heated skin. Seungmin noticed how your breath hitched but you didn’t make any attempts to bolt otherwise. Quite the opposite in fact - you leaned into his touch, even closing your eyes.

“Thank you”, you whispered almost inaudibly. “It’s nice to hear that.”

Seungmin cupped your cheek and moved your head until you properly faced him. “It sounds like you’re not believing me.”

You giggled softly and shook your head. “No, I do believe you. After all, a Fae can’t lie.”

Seungmin scoffed but failed to hide his own amusement, the corners of his mouth twitching upwards. He leaned down to your face, his breath fanning over your skin. His eyes darted from yours down to your lips and back up again. 

Another few heartbeats passed until he finally pressed his soft lips against your own. Your eyes fluttered close as you melted into his touch. You felt one of his arms snake around your middle, keeping you stable while his hand still cupped your face and held you in place for him to explore the kiss.

You couldn’t indulge in the kiss as an earth shattering scream filled the clearing and a supernatural force pushed you away from Seungmin.

While Seungmin caught himself with the help of his wings, you stumbled backwards until you landed on your behind. Your eyes searched the area until they landed on a figure engulfed in shadows hovering above the clearing.

His wings - that resembled wings of a moth - slowly brought him down to the surface of the earth. With one last dramatic movement of his wings, he tugged them behind his back and glared at Seungmin. “I want a duel with you!”

Seungmin sighed deeply and crossed his arms in front of his chest, letting his head hang so his eyes got covered by strands of hair. “Ji, you know full well I never agree to duel you.”

As the two Fae argued with each other, the earlier enchantment on you slowly faded again and you realised the situation you found yourself in. You were still in the middle of The Hunt and right now you betrayed Chan by making it way too easy for both his students.

You scrambled back to your feet and dashed away from the Fae, ignoring the sense of deja vu overcoming you. 

The second Jisung noticed how you bolted, he dropped his argument with Seungmin and rushed past him, following you as quickly as possible. He had to fold his wings the second he reached the edge of the forest as well, not wanting to tear them apart on some of the low hanging branches.

You heard the maniac snickering close behind you and the sense of deja vu you had just a second ago vanished. With trepidation you realised what it meant to be hunted by a Fae of the Oidhche court. They hunted for pleasure, hunted for fun. Humans were nothing but playthings in their eyes.

The blood in your veins froze when you heard him sing-song behind you, calling out for you in a sickly sweet voice.

A scream tore its way through your lips as you lost your footing and rolled down a hill, dry leaves and twigs churning underneath your weight. You barely got on your knees when a cold hand grabbed your ankle and pulled you down again, pinning you under a body.

“Got you”, he breathed down your neck, making the small hairs stand on edge. 

You tried fighting his weight, writhing underneath him. All you needed to do was reach the iron ring you kept in your pouch, all you needed was a second of distraction for you to flee again, all you needed was to get away from him so you wouldn’t disappoint Chan.

At that moment you heard the caw of a raven nearby. Your desperation grew even more but when the weight of you shifted, it only did so to spin you around and on your back.

Jisung straddled you again, staring down at you with wide, crazy eyes. “You’re quite pretty for a human”, he whistled through his teeth. His eyes slowly raked over your body, he nodded appreciatively along what he saw. “I can get what Chan sees in you.”

You writhed underneath him again, trying to push him off but roots that seemingly appeared out of nowhere wrapped around your wrists and pinned them down above your head.

“Ah, ah, ah, little human. Don’t make me mad now.” Jisung laughed as he grabbed behind his back and pulled a blade into your view.

Your eyes widened and panic scorched through your whole body. “You can’t do that”, you whispered, feeling your heart pounding violently inside your chest. Your mind screamed for Chan, begged for him to appear and push this Fae off of you. Your mind begged for Chan to save you but nothing happened.

Jisung leaned down, whispering some unintelligible nonsense as his blade cut through your clothes and revealed more of your bare skin. 

“You can’t hurt me”, you tried again, fighting against your restraints and his weight. You stilled just as quickly as you tried to escape when he pressed the sharp edge of the blade against your chest.

“Who said I’d hurt you?” He tilted his head and looked at you, appearing almost innocent with his wide, dark eyes and puffy cheeks.

You ignored his question and glared at him. The thought of Chan coming to your rescue, fueling your spite. “I am marked. For I belong to Chan. So you can’t harm me unless you want to face his wrath.”

Jisung blinked several times, simply staring down at you. “I wonder which will get you killed faster - your loyalty or your stubbornness.”

You swallowed harshly, about to retort something when he pressed the blade into your skin. The sting of the cut made you hiss and your eyes widened from the shock he actually cut you. “You hurt me!”

“Did I?” He laughed crazily as he leaned down and licked over the thin cut on your skin, collecting the droplet of blood. 

A gasp escaped your lips. With horror you realised something else mixed with your shock, something more primal and needy.

Jisung noticed the shift in your eyes. His grin widened and he immediately ripped your clothes apart, leaving you completely bare beneath him.

Your breath hitched as the cool night air brushed over your exposed skin. You involuntarily trembled and your nipples hardened while your eyes followed his moves intently.

He traced invisible patterns along your skin, cutting you every now and then with a soft giggle. Jisung grew bolder upon hearing your needy whimpers, making deeper cuts that drew actual lines of blood.

You gasped from the pain but your back arched nonetheless, wanting to receive more. At the edge of your consciousness you heard the caw of the raven again. As you tilted your head to the side you noticed Chan standing there with wide eyes. You moaned from another cut on your skin and your eyes fluttered from the pleasure coursing inside of you.

Chan stopped in his movements. He saw his student cut you up and appeared to stop him from hurting you further. So it came with quite the surprise to hear you moan so lustfully in the middle of the woods. Chan swallowed loudly, feeling how his own length hardened inside his pants.

You opened your eyes again, seeing how Chan had pulled out his dick. He slowly pumped himself as he watched you from the sidelines. You bit on your lower lip, another wave of pleasure burning through your body. You wanted more, you wanted him to touch you too. “Please”, you begged breathlessly.

A chuckle from the other side caught your attention and you turned your head around, seeing Seungmin leaning against a tree just a few feet away from you. He watched you with a tilted head, smirking when your eyes met. “Guess I joined the party just in time.”

You couldn’t help yourself but moan at the thought of having three Fae pleasuring you at the same time.

“Is that the reason why you keep that human around?” Jisung trailed his knife down to your core, pressing the cool blade against your clit and watching you twitch helplessly from the stimulation. He glanced at Chan, who only looked at you, completely forgetting about his two students as he zoned in on your expression and exposed body. 

“It seems like there aren’t as many downsides to owning a human as I thought”, Seungmin hummed as he pushed himself from the tree and walked closer as well. “Could a mere human be the solution to all problems between the courts?”

You looked up at him, not entirely able to understand his words. Instead your focus moved to his extremely tight pants, letting you imagine the hard cock trapped in its confinements. 

Jisung’s eyes switched from Seungmin to Chan and then down to you. While he caught you and wanted to take you himself, a curiosity - sparked by Seungmin’s question - coursed through his mind. 

Would a human even be able to handle all of them at once?

He turned his attention to Seungmin, his eyes narrowed to a glare. “The one who cums first loses the duel.”

Seungmin raised one eyebrow, amusement playing all over his features. He curled his lips knowingly. “Deal.”

You watched him move his hands and murmur something under his breath. Magic circles appeared around your body, glowing mysteriously and lifting you up into the air - resulting in Jisung falling down on his behind and cursing at Seungmin.

Jisung quickly got back on his feet and stepped closer to you, just like Seungmin did. They didn’t entirely focus on your naked form, half glaring at each other and trying to figure out ways to best one another.

The tension thickened and you were sure you’d easily cut it with a knife. It heightened your senses and spiked your arousal. 

Ever so slowly you turned your head again, looking at Chan through half lidded eyes. He still stood on the same spot as before, silently jerking himself off. His movements appeared calculated, as if he tried to drag on his high. 

Your eyes were trained on his thick cock, noting how hard it looked, how the tip already leaked glistening pre cum and how Chan squeezed himself at the base before moving up again. A whine ripped out of your throat, feeling needy and impatient.

A sudden slap to your tit made you jolt in the air. Reluctantly you brought your attention back to the other two Fae. You struggled to see past the glowing circle around your middle but you felt their intense stares on your skin. 

Jisung pushed your legs apart, his eyes immediately drawn to your heat. He licked over his lips and raised the hand with the knife to your thigh. A groan escaped his throat when he saw you clench around nothing the second he drew the blade along your skin. “Fuck”, he breathed out, forcing himself to look at your face, “you’re really down bad for this.” He moved the blade to your clit and slapped it with small motions.

You barely heard his delighted laughter as your body involuntarily jerked from the sensation, making you all fuzzy inside your head. Air got stuck in your throat when you felt the cool tip of the knife protruding into your hole.

“If you hurt her, Chan will rip your head off”, Seungmin murmured towards Jisung. Despite his warning, he couldn’t help his own sensation of arousal coursing through his body. He palmed himself through his pants, watching for a moment longer.

“I covered the blade with a spell”, Jisung told him snarkily, pushing the knife further into you. “Unless I pull the magic away, this weapon won’t cut her.”

You clamped down around the blade, the coolness of the metal making your body react on its own. You arched your back and threw your head back, the desire consuming you whole.

Seungmin grunted something under his breath before he moved to your head. His hands gently caressed your skin, tweaking your nipple on their way down to your throat. He grabbed your neck with one hand, holding you in place.

Unable to move your head, you were forced to watch him undo his pants, pulling them away until his dick sprung free. He grabbed the base and shuffled in front of you until his cock perfectly aligned with your lips. Seungmin tapped against your mouth, smearing his precum all over your lips. He used some pressure on the base of your skull, forcing you to open your mouth.

You garbled around his shaft, involuntarily swallowing and choking on it in the process. Tears sprung to your eyes and you helplessly raised your hands to his thighs, searching for some sort of leverage. 

Despite your struggles, Seungmin continued to push his dick into your wet mouth, thrusting into you without a second thought. 

You tried to relax your jaw, tried to breathe shallowly through your nose. Still, you gagged every time he hit the back of your throat. Saliva and tears dripped down your face. Yet, you still wanted more - needed more. You clawed at his thighs, pulling him closer.

At the same time Jisung used the slick of your pussy to cover his fingers and length. He was about to pull his knife out, when Chan interrupted his movements.

You hadn’t even noticed how he had come closer to you. You barely even saw how he had grabbed onto Jisung’s wrist. “You can fuck any opening but her pussy”, Chan growled from deep within his chest, “that one belongs to only me.”

The lust and desire coming from him hit you like a tidal wave, making you whine for him even more.

Jisung huffed, trying to hide his pout but nodded nonetheless. While he knew Chan was from a court he himself considered as soft and weak, Jisung knew better than to fight Chan.

Therefore Jisung kept the knife inside your head and started to play around the rim of your ass.

You exhaled with a shiver upon feeling his fingers protrude, stretching you until he deemed it enough. You cried out around Seungmin’s dick when Jisung pushed his cock into your ass. The foreign feeling had you writhing before the pleasure hit you.

Chan grabbed one of your hands and moved it away from Seungmin’s thighs. He cupped your hand and wrapped it around his shaft, guiding your movements to jerk him off.

Both Jisung and Seungmin fucked into you with a relentless pace. They followed their needs up until they remembered the duel.

All of a sudden they pulled away from you at the same time, panting heavily and staring at your body with wide eyes. Their magic started to waver as they concentrated on keeping themselves from releasing.

Chan caught you before the magic circles holding you in the air vanished and with a flick of his wrist he threw the knife away into the dark before the protecting spell would disappear. “You’re doing so good, babygirl”, he whispered into your ear, cradling you to his body. Chan kissed your temple and wiped over your face with his thumbs. 

You whined softly and hid your face in the crook of his neck. You felt the knot inside your body - the tightness keeping you on edge. Your hands already found their way to Chan’s cock, wrapping the fingers around the shaft and pumping it eagerly.

“Always so needy”, Chan snickered and pressed you against his chest so you were unable to move at all. He turned his gaze to Jisung and Seungmin, silently noting they were still hard. “Your duel isn’t over yet. Not until there is a clear winner or the both of you agree on a truce.”

“I’ll never agree to that!” Jisung spat immediately, shooting daggers with his eyes towards the other Fae.

Seungmin sighed exasperatedly. “I do refuse to lose to such a hot headed fool.”

Chan nodded shortly, accepting their stances on the matter. He looked down at you, trying to hide his grin from your desperate wiggles in his hold. “Babygirl, we’re trying something new today.” 

With that he lowered himself on the ground, sitting cross legged with you on his lap. You tilted your head in curiosity, receiving one more kiss on the tip of your nose, before Chan grabbed your sides and turned you upside down.

You yelped out in surprise, followed by a short laugh. This position - with your legs over his shoulders, your pussy right in front of his face and your face aligned with his dick - was foreign and you felt how the blood slowly but surely moved to your head. 

“Tap my side twice if it becomes too much”, Chan instructed you.

His breath fanned over your wet folds, making you shiver in delight already. You couldn’t hold your desires back any longer, needing it to take over your body again. 

Chan cursed when your lips latched onto his dick, sucking him into your mouth. For a moment he relished in the feeling. He held you tightly, groaning from the sensation you gave him.

After a while Chan beckoned the other two Fae to step closer. “You can share her ass”, he told them matter of factly, “the pussy is still mine.” With that he latched his lips onto your clit, nibbling and sucking on the sensitive nub while pressing his big nose into your folds.

You moaned around his dick, your body jolting from the pleasure. For a second you stiffened as you felt fingers playing around the rim of your ass again, stretching your hole and pushing in and out off beat to each other. You could only imagine both Fae having their fingers inside of you, refusing to fuck you the same way like the other. 

“She’s loving this”, Chan grunted against your folds, “her body is crying out for more.”

You whined and desperately tried wiggling your ass, agreeing with Chan’s words. You were so close to your release but you needed an extra push now.

You gasped upon feeling both Fae pushing their dicks into your ass at the same time. They held onto your legs now, grunting as they descended down on you.

Jisung immediately started scratching your leg, marking it in dozens of red lines before starting his own rhythm to fuck your behind.

Seungmin’s pace contrasted with him. It was slower and with more intention. His hands caressed your skin, appearing almost like soft little tickles.

You gagged around Chan’s dick, the sensation of being so full - so filled with pleasure and brought to the edge so quickly - made you cum instantly. Your whole body spasmed while your vision blacked out. Your head spun, fuzzy and light, as if you were on the verge of passing out. 

The boys continued to fuck into you, getting you through your orgasm and continuing even afterwards. They ignored your garbled sounds and your whining, knowing if you truly wanted them to stop you’d tap Chan’s side - but you didn’t. 

You felt another high approaching from the way they used you for their own pleasure. You cried out again. The force of the second orgasm ripped through you like a tsunami.

This time the Faes came as well. The way your muscles squeezed them so tightly, neither of them could hold back.

Chan shot his load down your throat, cursing against your clit as he still held you tightly.

At the same time Jisung and Seungmin came inside your ass, shooting ropes and ropes of cum into you and painting your inside white.

Once they stepped back from you, Chan carefully turned you in his arms, holding you now in bridal style. He brushed strands of hair out of your face, admiring your fucked out form.

You hummed softly, focusing on simply breathing after such an intense orgasm. You felt how Jisung and Seungmin’s cum trickled out of your ass. You had your eyes closed, yet you felt the stares of all three Fae on your body. 

“You’re so beautiful”, Seungmin whispered and Han agreed with a hum.

“I can’t wait for a real Hunt with my own human now.”

Chan chuckled softly as he gently nosed along your throat and jaw. “You learned how to hunt and how to claim a human - in theory - since I won’t let anyone claim my baby girl.” He kissed your temple and then looked up at the two Fae. “What about your duel though?”

Seungmin and Jisung eyed each other - one even shrugging his shoulders. “Technically your human came first”, Seungmin mumbled, avoiding eye contact with Chan.

Jisung quickly agreed. “So your human lost the duel and that’s it.”

You scoffed and turned in Chan’s hold, moving away from his two students and hiding your face in his chest. “I didn’t even agree to join any duel”, you grumbled.

Chan caressed your hair and whispered a few praises into your ear. After a moment he dismissed Jisung and Seungmin, accepting their decision on the result. 

Technically he couldn’t care less about their little feud. The only thought on Chan’s mind was having you all to himself again after six painstakingly long days of not being near you at all. 

“You’re too good to be true.”

“Am not.”

“Yes, you are”, Chan chuckled and kissed your temple again. “Let me get you home and show you how good - no, how perfect - you actually are.”

You giggled softly and hit his chest. “You just want to fuck me again without your students present.” You turned in his hold and cupped his face. “I never thought you’d be the sharing type anyway.”

Chan’s eyes darkened. Without a warning he pushed three fingers into your cunt and cupped your clit, pressing down on it with his palm until you squirmed in his hold. “That needy pussy belongs to me”, he growled again, “I’ll never share that with another being.”

You cursed under your breath, the arousal crashing into you with full force again, as if it never left to begin with. You pictured Chan fucking you on the forest floor from behind like the needy bitch you felt like at the moment. But that image quickly changed when Chan spoke up again.

“Hold on tight, love.” He smirked down at you. “Flying might not be the only high you get on our way home.”

© all rights reserved

Taglist: @xavi-in-kpopland​

[himmelsstern]

“Wait, you like me?”

There are definitely not enough stories about these two and I don't think this will be my last. But I feel like I never quite did Chishiya's character justice and there are fantastic authors here who can do that much better.

Still, I hope someone likes this one. Enjoy!

Note: English is not my native language and any errors in grammar and spelling will be forwarded to my online translator.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Archive of our own link: rhttps://archiveofourown.org/works/44064697

Chishiya wasn't someone who let his guard down, and even after all the time they'd spent together, Arisu still couldn't manage to see behind the arrogant mask. So it was even more surprising when, out of nowhere, Chishiya put a hand on the back of his neck and pulled him into a hard kiss after a game they had just barely made within the time limit. Chishiya left no doubt who was in control, but Arisu managed to pull away from him, if only a few inches.

"What was that?" Chishiya snorted, looking at Arisu with a cocky smile on his lips. "Don't tell me no one has ever kissed you before." Arisu blushed, and for a tiny moment Chishiya's eyes widened in surprise. "So I'm right. Interesting."

Arisu pressed his lips together and he looked hurt as he tore himself free from Chishiya's grip.

"Play your games with someone else." "Who said I was playing games?" "You always do, you play games with people to get what you want."

Chishiya tilted his head slightly, still with a smirk on his lips, and Arisu could feel this expression slowly making him angry. Not only had Chishiya been his first kiss, no, he obviously had to make fun of it. Arisu had actually naively thought that by now they were something like allies and there was peace between them but Chishiya proved to him once again that Arisu was too trusting. Niragi had said to Chishiya after the Hatter's death that he had a way of looking down on others, and at that moment Arisu realized once again how right he had been.

Arisu was about to turn to leave when Chishiya's fingers wrapped around his wrist and held him back. "You're right, I often play with people, especially when I can take advantage of it. In this world, it's eat or be eaten, and I don't like being the prey, It suits me more to be a hunter." Chishiya circled Arisu and stood in front of him and he actually seemed serious.

"I'm honestly sorry that I, of all people, was your first kiss, but I'm not playing with you." "You're not? Then why did you kiss me?" Chishiya's hand settled on Arisu's neck again, but the grip was loose and Arisu could have easily pulled away at any time, but he was frozen in place. Chishiya's fingers gently stroked the skin and goosebumps covered Arisu's body. "The game today was closer than usual. Closer than I would have liked. And I'm no one to regret anything. Dying without kissing you would definitely be something I'd regret." "I don't think I quite understand what you mean." "Don't make me say it." Slowly, Arisu began to catch on, but his final demand still seemed too grotesque. "You are one of the few people I care about." "Wait, does that mean you like me?" "I thought that would have been obvious." Arisu shook his head in disbelief. "You have a strange way of showing it." "I'm asking your opinion, incorporating your suggestions into my plans. I actually just count on myself and stay to myself, and yet I'm still with you. Why do you think I'm doing all this?" "I never thought about it." "You're smart, Arisu. You know why." Arisu felt as if thoughts were racing around in his head, so he did the first thing that came to mind. His lips rested just feather lightly on Chishiya's, almost as if he was waiting for him to take control again. Arisu was aware that Chishiya needed and enjoyed this control, and he had no problem giving it to him. In fact, it was pleasant not to have to think, that he was being led by someone else.

Apart from that, there was this fear of doing something wrong or embarrassing himself, because this was his second kiss and he preferred not to think about with how many people Chishiya might have had something in the old world. He seemed to have noticed his insecurity, because he loosened the kiss and lightly nudged his nose against Arisus, a tender gesture that hardly seemed to suit Chishiya. Arisus knew only his hard side, the arrogance and cockiness he let other people see. Chishiya was not gentle, he was ruthless. But just now he presented Arisu a side that made his worldview shake.

"Don't think." "But-" "Don't. Think." Chishiya pushed Arisu against the nearest wall, making him gasp in surprise. "I don't know if I'm ready for that." "Ready to kiss me?" Arisu felt the blood rush to his cheeks and he looked anywhere except at Chishiya's face. "No, for-" Arisu seemed to be searching for words, visibly embarrassed, and Chishiya knew immediately what he was talking about. "Don't worry, that wasn't my goal. At least not since I've known." "But that's what it comes down to. Is that what this is all about?" "Have you been listening to me at all?" "I have, but I just don't get it." "You're much more likely not believe me. Actually I should be proud, obviously I have a good influence on your survival instinct." It seemed they had reversed roles, because this time it was Arisu who stopped Chishiya from leaving. "Maybe you're right. Maybe I should stop thinking." Arisu whispered against Chishiya's lips before kissing him again. "I'm always right, you should know that by now." Before Arisu could say anything, another kiss silenced him.

Chishiya was calculating, arrogant, and far too often self-absorbed. But that night, Arisu had learned that he was more than what he let others see.

They were by now lying in the kingsize bed that took up most of the room that Chishiya had claimed for himself. "How does this go on? You and me I mean." "In this world, it's absolutely stupid and dangerous to develop feelings. It makes you vulnerable and distracted." "Oh." "I wasn't finished." Chishiya's fingers gently ran through Arisu's hair and he promptly relaxed again. "You are the perfect example that my thesis can be disproved. You personify what I thought was a sure death sentence. You let yourself go with your gut and act irrationally even in the most dangerous and dicey situations, but it always worked out in the end. Cause you're here, and you're alive."

Chishiya engaged Arisu in a tender kiss before continuing. "What I meant to say was, I'm damn good alone but almost invincible with you by my side." Arisu laughed softly and closed his eyes in satisfaction. "I like you too, Chishiya."

[ciaossu-imagines]

The angst potential of Gokudera's partner sacrificing themself to save someone else in the famiglia, tho. The Vongola comes first, after all, and his partner knows that

Okay, but I have definitely written things along this line before…it still remains one of my favourite possibilities though because there is so much potential for angst there and, my fuck, do I love breaking some character’s hearts for the drama and fantastic character stories and just…it makes me strangely happy, haha!

So, I could definitely see this being a thing that could happen. Mafia life, even while it’s downplayed some in the manga and it’s made to look charming, is dirty and dangerous and the very real possibility of dying early is something every Mafioso has to learn to deal with.

And Gokudera is okay with that. He’s accepted the dangers he puts himself in and he thought he had internally accepted the real and present danger to his loved ones.

But he really hasn’t because, somewhere in the back of his mind, he had always assumed that his family and his lover would be fine, that he could always somehow keep them safe in this seedy life they all live.

He trusts in his partner’s strength enough to not demand anymore that he be sent on missions with them. They can handle themselves and they do for a good long time. Life seems stable, happy even for Gokudera and his little found family he’s created with the Vongola.

But they go lead a mission when he’s desperately needed somewhere else, Tsuna’s orders, and he assumes it will be like every other time and they will come home victorious.

Except they don’t come home. The Vongola headquarters hear it through the radio-coms first and tell Tsuna, who calls Gokudera right away…or, if you really want to get angsty, they’re all on comms in different areas and Gokudera gets to hear his lover’s last minutes playing in his ear while he’s powerless to protect them or help them or save them in any way.

He’d definitely not react well. Whatever danger the family was facing…all the grief that threatens to choke him and makes his head swim and his chest feel like it’s second away from exploding…it manifests itself as anger because that’s always how Gokudera feels most comfortable with expressing himself. The danger doesn’t just get handled; it gets burned to ashes.

But that doesn’t really help. It doesn’t take away that grief and I feel like Gokudera would really have an issue with properly handling his grief, getting stuck in the denial and anger stages for years.

If it’s just some other no-name Vongola member his partner died protecting, I feel like Gokudera would direct a lot of his anger there and would never forgive them…hell, I think that Vongola member wouldn’t be a member too much longer.

But if it was another Guardian? Or even better, Tsuna??? That makes everything in Gokudera’s world and in his mind so much harder because he’s always been so devoted to them but at the same time, he blames them and there’s this bitterness that does grow in his heart towards them and he hates himself for it so there’s even more guilt and shame and it all just weighs him down.

I don’t feel like, even if Tsuna offered to pay for a grief counselor for Gokudera (which I doubt would happen because KHR likes to pretend like therapists don’t exist, even though honestly, the Vongola should be handing out individual therapists to everyone for the rest of their lives the way Oprah hands out goodies to her viewers), he wouldn’t take it because in a lot of ways, he will blame himself. In his mind, it wouldn’t have happened if he’d only have been there. Or if he’d been stronger, strong enough to prevent that danger from ever being a real threat. So, in a really sick way, he’ll want to hold onto that guilt and shame and grief because he’ll feel like it’s only right that he feels it, that it’s what he deserves for not being good enough.

I also don’t think he’d take another serious lover for years, maybe even decades, if that happened, going back to flings, and keeping people really far away from him. Unless the others tried really hard, he’d even start to grow the distance between him and the other family members because he just can’t mentally or emotionally handle everything and becomes obsessively scared, even though he won’t understand that that is what he feels, of losing another precious person to him. So, if he hardens his heart or creates distance or actively pushes people away, he’s safe from that.

[theindependenttrentcrimm]

The One With the Shifter

Eric tilted his head back, mouth open in a loud laugh. He dropped his bottle onto the table. 

“He didn’t!” 

“Swear to god he did. Stupid son of a bitch ran straight at me, capped him in two,” Dean grinned back. “Silver bullets,” he mimed blowing smoke over his two fingers, formed in the shape of a gun, “Nothin’ like em.” 

“Damn straight.” Eric leaned across the table and clicked their bottles together. Even John was relaxed, his eyes that were usually guarded and cut into a cruel shape flitted across the room in an almost calm manner, people watching rather than assessing threats. He was pressed against the wall of the booth next to Dean, leather jacket like a foreboding presence, real in its own nature.

“So,” Eric said, one lazy long grin of a person, bouncing from place to place without direction or a serious bone in his body. His partner was different, flinty eyes, dark hair, and a grin that opened under the press of a bottle. He was older, hairs graying, around John’s age, the one who had hooked them up in the first place. “I’m sure you’ve got war stories, John.”

“Eric,” his partner warned, mouth dipping into a frown.

“Kaleb,” Eric mouthed back, eyelashes framing hazel eyes in a faux placating gesture. His lips parted in a long draw, Dean’s eyes following them as he swallowed, all the way down. 

“Sorry ‘bout him,” Kaleb said, directing his gaze to John. Dean watched as Eric’s fingers played with the condensation trickling down the side of the bottle. They were long and slender, nails chipped and dirty on calloused fingertips. They stilled, directing his gaze upwards to the owner’s face, eyes teasing his own.

“‘S fine, no problem with being curious.” Dean could feel John’s stare on him, hot and claustrophobic, holding him in place. “Just be careful it doesn’t bite him in the ass.”

Dean cleared his throat, “More beer?” Kaleb tilted his beer amicably, almost empty.

“I’ll join you,” Eric said, gathering his own in his hand.

“Right,” Dean swallowed and it was a testament to how strange the whole situation was that he didn’t even register his father’s, “Thank you, Dean” until after he’d already picked it up and his feet took him away from the table. 

“So,” Eric said, after ordering and sliding his arm until his weight shifted from his responsibility to that of the bar’s. Loose limbed. “Your dad’s kind of intense.” 

“Yeah, no shit,” Dean felt a laugh bubble up out of him. Eric grinned back at him and something inside Dean’s chest curled. He looked away, mouth pulling into a frown. “He needs to be. Intense. Anything else gets you killed.”

“He tell you that?” Dean didn’t deign to respond. 

“Two beers.” Eric turned to the bartender and grabbed the offered drinks. 

“Thanks.”

“Two?” Dean asked. Eric shrugged. 

“They can entertain themselves.” Dean’s nose wrinkled.

“Dude.” Eric shrugged again and the light from the blinking sign above the bar hit his shoulders and framed his head in pale light. The breath caught in his chest. 

“Relax,” Eric said, handing him one of the two beers. “You can survive without him for ten minutes.” 

“Smartass.”

“Comes with the package, sweetheart.” Dean nearly choked.

“Hey, man. Flattered but I don’t,” his protest died on his lips as Eric tilted his bottle and pressed it against his lower lip.

“You don’t?” He pressed. Dean shook his head. Eric’s laugh bubbled out of him, light, flirty. “Figured. It’s always the ones who are too damn pretty for their own good.” Dean meant to disagree, say something about the shifter bits in his hair or the smear of dirt across his nose but all that came out was,

“You’re not too bad yourself.” 

“Careful, someone might think you do.”

“You someone?”

“Maybe,” Eric said with a wink. They had migrated away from the bar and were crowded in the back corner, drowned out by crappy music and the click of pool cues. 

“Maybe that wouldn’t be so terrible.” 

“Fuck you!” Eric said, punctuated with an explosive laugh and a soft punch to Dean’s shoulder. “I’m a fantastic kisser.”  

“Is that so? No customer complaints?”

“You’re crass,” Eric said and took a second to contemplate, “and beautiful.”

“Heard that one before.” Eric turned to face him more fully, his eyes alight with something that buried itself deep in Dean’s chest and began burning. He curled away, shoving his hands into his pockets.

“I mean it,” Eric said, not shying away in the least despite Dean’s posture. He raised his eyebrow instead.

“I’m fucking relaxed,” Dean muttered in response, his fingers tapping against theglass.

“I believe you.” Eric reached over and took his bottle. “Can I?” He asked, catching Dean’s eye. That small burning was producing too much smoke, choking his throat and catching in his mouth, the taste of ash on his tongue. 

“What?” Too used to ‘take,’ and ‘more,’ and ‘anything you want’s to process a simple ‘can.’ 

“Let it be said I am a gentleman,” then, quieter: “Now, can I?” Dean wiped a hand over his mouth and looked away until Eric’s fingers, light on his chin, maneuvered him back. 

“Dean.”

“Just-“ Dean said and before he knew it, he was nodding, just rocking gently into this practically stranger’s- a fucking handsome stranger- hands. Eric spread his palm against his right cheek and leaned in, lips torn and rough against his own. They scraped together but somehow, someway, it was gentle, turning the rest of the world into background noise. Eric pressed firm and lovely, mouth softening on Dean’s own and shit- he was a good kisser. Dean pulled back after a minute and slumped against the wall. Eric watched him silently as though waiting for something, to get punched or bolt, Dean wasn’t really sure.

“Okay,” Dean said eventually, fingers touching his lips lightly.

“Okay?” Eric mimicked and there was that damn eyebrow.

“Yeah, okay, asshole,” Dean muttered, but there wasn’t a trace of malice to his voice. “Maybe I do.” Eric laughed again. 

“Maybe?” Dean just grabbed the edge of his shirt and pulled him over. 

[azurevalley]

Poor Things film thoughts (spoilers, duh)

The first 15 mins with monochrome colouring really scared me, I was expecting something pretty pretentious from that but my god did it pick up. This has to be one of my favourites in a long time, the semi-fantastical setting was shockingly well done, and I was not expecting such a hard hitting feminist story.

I went to see this with my dad (at some point I should really start checking for sexual content warnings when I go to the flicks with him '_'), and even he enjoyed it, although I doubt I could have a serious deep conversation with him about the themes and iconography. From the opening I was sort of expecting more of a horror-adjacent story, but thankfully it gave way to the more coming-of-age stuff I generally prefer.

Bella was such a compelling protagonist, I get the whole "women are expected to be adults long before they are ready, and this is represented by having a toddler in a grown woman's body" but the whole immature brain thing was done amazingly. As someone with the 'tism I can very much appreciate the whole thing of blunt observation, although I fear my ability to simply state random things and use people's words against them has been whittled down somewhat. I'm not sure how I feel about Bella's stint as a prostitute, it's shockingly... clean? looking, and as I have never had any conversations with sex workers about sex work but have heard a bunch of conflicting shit off the internet I'll simply withhold judgement for now.

What did really interest me was the lawyer guy Bella went to travel with, I have 0 romantic experience so idk how lifelike the character is, but from what I hear there are too many men who think and act like him, with the lack of basic comprehension of Bella's condition. I aren't expecting him to guess that she's got an infant's brain in her, but I am expecting him to become much more explicit and careful around her.

Then again, the surprise husband at the end was pretty explicit, "a man has to conquer territory, you are my property" (something like that) so idk. That was at a point where Bella didn't need such explicit statements anyway, irony I guess.

Godfrey was an interesting character too, the whole intro set him up to be Frankenstein-like, and then he tells the betrothed guy to recognize her free will and self-determination. I was sort of expecting his brain to be transplanted to the evil husband at the end, but the story as a whole has a surprising respect for the end of life and one's right to oblivion. Theoretically, transplanting his brain would be a horrible idea as unlike an infants' he would have problems communicating with the body.

Everything was so surreal though, the strange chimeras in the beginning and the off-kilter CG backgrounds really gave it a visual identity. The extra-saturated colours of the sky really drew me in, and the weird mix of technologies and locations. What really stuck out to me was the cable cars in Alexandria, especially with the zoom out when they left showing how tiny the island resort thing was.

Overall, very surreal but poignant and beautiful.

[foxglove03]

I am on a flight across the North Atlantic back home. The border guard asked me what I had bought while in Ireland and I felt strangely compelled to tell him a lie. Instead, I said I had only spent money on clothes and it was not a lot. Three hours into the flight and I sit completely afraid every bodily ache is a sign of impending doom. All the things I am, to add being half a hypochondriac to the list makes a varied mix. Since I learned how the author of “Goodnight Moon” died kicking her leg up as a sign of good health to her nurse, you can’t be too careful. I said all my tacky goodbyes to the people in my apartment, promised to talk, said the time I spent with them was nice. None of them believed me probably. I have a compulsive need to convey my true feelings and they’re all not idiots. Everything got so spoiled in record time. I was going back to look at pictures from when I arrived. In just a few months, an opinion can be formed so solidly. And I think we all had such unmoving thoughts two to three weeks in. My roommate made me promise her several times that hang out with her in the future. It’s an absolute miracle who you’d hug if that’s what the social convention calls for. I hugged my least favorite roommate goodbye though he never cleaned and only produced miraculous mess after mess, and of all things slept with the one girl I liked. Also fought with me frequently after the first month of arriving to our apartment. Everyone looked at me to hug him so I relented.

The sick feeling in my stomach during the last few days of getting my things together has finally stopped for the most part. It was no definitive transition. It was there and the next second I thought about it, gone. Probably went somewhere with the Dublin train. On the train I finished reading “Stoner” by John Williams and cried very quietly making my face all sticky the way tears do. Particularly it was the last twenty or so pages that got me in William Stoner’s story. He was a character that longed for a passion he didn’t possess himself and never got quite a hold of in his life. This made his death rattle in the final pages a painful one. Although he seemed to extract joy from teaching, it was never with a memorable fire to me. The book is exactly what my parents always accuse me of indulging in too much. Bubbling misery in every movie, book and song. I did like the book, but I think it’s funny it ever reared its head out of its fifty-something year old obscurity.

Now I won’t be confusing this alleviation of semester stress for a tranquility in my personal life. Most of those details mustn’t be thought of for pure continuity’s sake. Plus I have a nightmarish paper to be completed in the next 12 hours on whether or not Greek figured pottery can offer any information on the Athenian economy. It can’t, I’ve beat the horse in 150 ways and have about 1/4 of the paper to go. I downloaded the 2011 version of Twin Fantasy which I think I’ve only listened to briefly before. I was watching the version of “Sober To Death” Will Toledo does on Tiny Desk and it’s fantastic, completely love it. Looking through the comments someone says a bit about how they preferred before his changes made in the re-record. Since I’m an all-out media purist I had to listen. I think I should do some drawings just on the parts he cut out in all the songs. I’m such a sucker for long drawling speaking parts. It’s completely different but it reminds me of the song “Waking of The Witch” by Kate Bush. Absolutely nothing alike other than a song with no singing involved, incantations, monologues and exclamations instead of singing.

I can’t wait to get coffee in a vat. A comically large, pissing your pants type of size they have in the states. Being handed that will have me singing God Bless America backwards or break into cartwheels of patriotism. I’m hoping to avoid any serious thought over the course of the next few weeks and using my time to just draw like a maniac and read twelve books and absorb the contents of this lovely, terrible app. I have to complete a commission of many different dogs which I’ve been putting off. The woman who’s paying me will totally give me a lot more money the work’s worth so I’m nervous about delivering something a good quality. I’ll need to draw more dogs.

I’ve also got some zine ideas in my head which’ll be great for a punk art event thing I’ve been invited to in February. One zine’s already done, it’s just a matter of printing.

I’m so paranoid about getting a blood clot that I have this image in my head of touching the ground and bursting like a ballon. If you’re reading this, that did not happen 🫡

(An aside, glanced at the woman reading right next to me and a line from her book said “I can live with her being happy, even if it’s a fucking dickhead causing it.” A beautiful example of 21st century prose lol)

[theharpermovieblog]

#HARPERSMOVIECOLLECTION

2023

I re-watched Tommy (1975)

I fucking love the band The Who. I have since highschool. I also love director Ken Russel. I love pretty much every actor and musician in this movie, so I should love this movie. I haven't seen it in forever and it's time for a rewatch.

A Rock Opera about a young boy who goes blind deaf and dumb after he witnesses a murder, and then grows up to become a famous pinball champion and eventually a Messiah.

Rock Operas are no doubt difficult to create. An album that tells a story. And then to somehow make that into a film is a tall order. You have to entertain an audience and you're already ostracizing the people who don't like the musical part of musicals. And, you have to hope that the rest of the audience enjoys every song after song because it's important that they are following along with the story.

For me personally, Tommy isn't my favorite Who album by far. It's good and there are some amazing songs its just not my favorite. And maybe the same could be said of this movie and Ken Russell. I like it, but it's certainly not my favorite Ken Russell film, although it still has some great moments.

Russell's use of "weirdness" throughout a long with This version of the Who's songs can be overwhelming and muddy at times, but during the times it all comes together it's fucking fantastic. The song Christmas is a great moment in the film. Eric Clapton doing eyesight to the blind with the Who backing him up is great, despite Clapton having zero energy. Tina Turner turns shit out, being anything but low energy in her turn at Acid Queen, followed by Paul Nichols bringing life to Cousin Kevin. Elton John does a damn good version of Pinball Wizard. And, of course when Roger Daltrey starts singing, his voice is perfect. Best song for me is when Daltrey and Pete Townshend do Sally Simpson.

Ann Margret is crazy good in this movie and Oliver Reed is always his sweaty fantastic self. Knowing of his party hard friendship with Who drummer Keith Moon adds a little fun to think about what they got up to behind the scenes.

Is this a drug movie? By that I mean, is it a movie you should do drugs before watching. I mean, I'm not advocating drug use, but let's just say this would be better on drugs. I didn't do drugs and I wish I had chewed up a few mushrooms before diving on in. Not only is it a 1970's rock opera, which lends itself to drug use, it is so excessive in every way. Russell seems to have wanted to just go for it without any restrictions. It certainly ends up with some serious cheesiness, but that's part of the fun. From a sober point of view it can be a little tedious at times and you can certainly end up worn out by it all.

What I've always loved about The Who is their ability to give such a huge amount of energy to everything. Even the slow songs feel big and important and franticly grand. Ken Russell isn't a strange choice to bring The Who to the big screen with his visually stimulating images and insane style, but in bringing these things together, it might all be too much.

But, despite it's many failings this is certainly a classic of both music and film. It's a moment in time that bathes in it's era.

Overall, Tommy lands on the side of a decent movie, which is a spectacle that fans of film and Rock and Roll should see. But, may I recommend the album Quadrophenia if you know nothing about The Who. (That album also technically got a movie which is pretty great)

[spencers-renaissance]

Emergency Contact

Summary: When Spencer ends up in the hospital again, his emergency contact �� who happens to be his boyfriend, Luke Alvez — is called. Too bad he hasn't told the team about him yet...

Tags: whump, h/c, hurt spencer, broken ribs, coming out, relationship reveal, protective derek, team as family, fluff, au: different first meeting

Pairing: Luke Alvez x Spencer Reid // (heavy on the Derek & Spencer friendship, too)

Word Count: 2.6k

Masterlist // Read on AO3 // Bad Things Happen Bingo

Okay, so Emily was not in S11, but for this fic she is, because I wanted supportive Penemily and that's what I gave myself. Other than that, this fills the square "broken ribs" for my Bad Things Happen bingo card. Enjoy the whump mixed with fluff!

Spencer doesn’t mean to get hurt again, but he also isn’t exactly surprised when it happens. If anything, Hotch really needs to stop sending him out to scope places and suspects out by himself. Surely Tobias Hankel proved he’s a trouble magnet in that regard years ago.

The summerhouse the suspect rents is a nice enough place to lay incapacitated while he waits for back-up, he supposes, but he’s not exactly able to lie and enjoy the sunshine when his ribs have been smashed in with a metal baseball bat and he knows the suspect is currently hightailing it down the beach. Not to mention the fact that it’s worryingly difficult to breathe.

Still, it’s better than a dilapidated cabin in the middle of butt-fuck nowhere Georgia, pumped full of heroin while his feet are whipped. Small mercies.

“Goddamnit, Spencer, again?” Derek asks amusedly when he finally arrives and crouches down by his side, but the undercurrent of worry in his voice doesn’t elude him.

“Sorry,” he wheezes, still winded and in immense pain from the ambush. “I didn’t see him coming.”

Derek raises a brow, chuckling slightly. “Yeah, pretty boy, I figured that.” His hand goes to Spencer’s hair as his expression furrows in concern again. “Did you see where he went? I’ll send the others after him while I go with you to the hospital.”

Spencer smiles a little, relieved that he won’t be alone. It’s become a strange sort of tradition to sit in one another’s hospital rooms after the job kicks their ass, and he’s glad Derek isn’t about to break it now.

“I saw him turn right out of the backdoor, but that’s all,” he says breathlessly, before cringing at the effort and folding in on himself even more.

“Okay, Spencer,” Derek says soothingly. “Just relax. The ambulance will be here any second.”

He obeys and closes his eyes as he listens to Derek call Hotch on the radio and send the team in the right direction before coming back to sit next to him on the floor.

“This might be one of the nicer places one of our unsubs has owned, huh?”

Spencer nods, mirroring Derek’s morbid amusement. “Crime pays better than investigating it,” he manages, smiling up at his friend.

He snorts. “You can say that again. With the way the market’s turned in the last couple years it’s more like this is my hobby and my properties are my day job, rather than the other way round.”

Spencer tries to reply, but he moves involuntarily in amusement, and a fresh wave of pain has him wincing again, trying to will the tears away.

“You’re alright, Spence,” Derek says gently, his hand returning to his hair. “Help will be here soon, okay?”

Thankfully, the medics do show up in a semi-timely fashion, and both of them are loaded into the back of the ambulance as the EMTs check him over, Derek’s hand not leaving his person unless it absolutely has to.

“How many times were you hit, Dr Reid?”

He cringes. “Four.” It’s almost embarrassing that the unsub got four hits in, and the only reason there weren’t more is because he was fleeing the scene, not because Spencer was able to fight back. He tries to remind himself that there isn’t much you can do when caught-off guard by a furious arsonist armed with a steel baseball bat, but his ego is still bruised. Albeit not as badly as his poor ribs.

“I’m gonna fucking kill him,” Derek mutters under his breath, his grip tightening on Spencer’s shoulder minutely enough for him to know he isn’t doing it consciously.

Spencer smiles appreciatively, closing his eyes against the pain. The non-narcotic painkillers they’re feeding him through the IV really aren’t doing anything.

“I think you’ve managed to avoid internal bleeding,” the EMT says, all though he tacks on a pointed, “just. But I’m concerned about the possibility of a punctured lung. There’s a chance your trouble breathing is solely pain-induced, but I don’t like the way your chest sounds. The doctors will check everything out when we get to the hospital, and get you all patched up.”

“Hold in there,” Derek says urgently. “I really can’t have you dying on me, pretty boy.”

Spencer smiles as comfortingly as he can through the immense pain in his chest and his mangled breathing. “Trust me, I don’t intend on it.”

The x-ray reveals two broken ribs and confirms the paramedic’s suspicions of a punctured lung, although thankfully, minor enough to not require surgery. He’s set up with oxygen and regular nurse check-ups in a quiet room after the doctor is able to remove the excess air in his chest cavity.

“How are you doing, Spence?” Derek asks worriedly as he pulls up a chair next to Spencer’s bed as soon as he’s allowed to see him.

He pulls away his oxygen facemask to answer. “A bit better,” he says, but his voice is dry and raspy from the oxygen so he certainly doesn’t sound it. “The pain meds are actually working now.”

Derek’s tight, anxious expression relaxes slightly. “That’s at least something.”

Spencer nods tiredly, but before he can respond, a nurse is popping her head round the door. “Dr. Reid,” she says genially, “sorry to interrupt. I just wanted to let you know that we’ve managed to get a hold of your emergency contact, and they’re on their way.”

Spencer’s eyes widen. How could he have forgotten? Granted, he was a little preoccupied with the whole punctured lung, broken ribs thing, but how could he have let it slip his mind that this little accident would lead to the secret he’s been keeping under wraps getting out?

When he’d first met Luke at an FBI gala last year, he never could have foreseen the most intimate and special relationship of his life coming to fruition, but it had. They’d connected on so many different levels, and the chemistry between them felt like something out of one of the fantastical romance novels Penelope reads, and when he’d asked if it was okay for Spencer to put Luke down as his updated emergency contact, he’d been rewarded with a wide, beautiful grin and a firm, heartfelt kiss.

It was serious enough, sure, and they were coming up on having been together for a year, but besides Emily and Penelope — who’d met Luke and developed an amusing, playful rivalry with him — he hadn’t introduced him to anyone on the team.

“On their way?” Derek asks, raising an eyebrow in mild confusion. “Isn’t your contact Hotch? He already knows you’re in the hospital.”

Spencer just stares at him like a rabbit caught in the headlights, completely blanking on something to say. They’re working a local case, so it won’t be long before Luke is bursting into his hospital room armed with cuddles and comfort, and as much as he craves that, he’s too busy panicking about his team finding out to really look forward to it.

Eventually, after watching Derek’s face morph into even stronger, more suspicious confusion, he gives up. They’re going to find out anyway. “I’m dating someone.”

Derek’s face lights up. “Pretty boy!” he exclaims happily, playfully pushing his shoulder as gently as he can. “That’s amazing! Why didn’t you say something? What’s her name?”

Ah. That’s the primary reason he hadn’t told his team about Luke. He’s nowhere close to being ashamed about his sexuality, he accepted himself decades ago, but he’s still not worked up the courage to share that part of himself with his team. Excluding Penelope and Emily who have been together for years (he’s still baffled as to how the others haven’t caught on yet), everyone’s in the dark.

It had started as a basic survival tactic. He’d joined the FBI two years younger than the standard entry age in the early 2000s, and he was far too concerned with just getting by than living outwardly as a gay man. And then, as time went by and he knew his team was accepting and welcoming, he found it too awkward to try and correct people when they assumed he was straight. There just wasn’t ever the right time.

“I’m gay.”

Derek’s happy expression falls and for a split second, Spencer feels a flash of panic. Maybe Derek’s okay with gay people as long as they’re not his immediate friends, as long as he doesn’t playfully call them ‘pretty boy’ and play with their hair when they’re injured, maybe—

“Well, what’s his name, then?”

Spencer looks up from his panic, seeing Derek smiling again, eyes maybe even brighter than they were just seconds ago.

“Wait—”

“Spencer, if you think I’m gonna care that you’re gay — if you think any of us will care that you’re gay, then you have another thing coming,” Derek reassures him. “Wait, that isn’t why you didn’t tell us right?”

He suddenly looks distraught at the idea that Spencer might not have felt comfortable coming out to him, and Spencer rushes to correct him. “No! No, I know everyone would be fine with it, I just didn’t really know how to say it. Penelope and Emily know, but only by accident.”

Derek relaxes, chuckling a little. “I’m sure there’s quite a story there.”

Spencer blushes. “Maybe.”

“I’ll find out later,” he says confidently, winking at him, and something in Spencer loosens at the fact that Derek hasn’t changed his behaviour at all. “But I’m more interested in Mr. Sexy Emergency Contact Mystery Boyfriend Man right now.”

Spencer outright laughs at that, before wincing painfully as his ribs twinge, and he has to fit the oxygen mask around his face again and breathe deeply for a couple of breaths before the nasal cannula can suffice again.

“I met him around this time last year at an FBI gala actually,” Spencer manages. “Everyone on our team bailed except Penelope, Emily, and me. He’s called Luke and he works in the Fugitive Task Force. We just clicked as soon as we met, you know? We have this chemistry that I’ve never felt with anyone before, and we started dating pretty quickly. We actually moved in together last month when his lease was up, but we’re thinking of moving to a bigger, nicer place in Mount Pleasant. Luke’s actually had his eye on this one house that went up…”

He trails off when he notices Derek looking at him strangely, suddenly feeling self-conscious. “What?”

“Nothing,” Derek says gently. “You just look happy, pretty boy. When you started talking about Luke you got this happy, dopey smile on your face, and I’ve just never seen you like that. It’s nice.”

“Oh.” He blushes fiercely at the acknowledgement of just how soft he is for his boyfriend, but it’s not embarrassing, he’s just ridiculously happy and head over heels in love.

Still, feeling a little awkward at the attention, he raises the oxygen mask to his face just for something to do.

“Does he treat you well?” Derek asks seriously, suddenly looking like the FBI tough guy he really is.

Spencer grins and nods, pulling the mask away again. “So good. He’s one of those people that looks out for everyone before himself, you know? He listens to my rambles and tangents like he actually knows and cares about what I’m saying, and he insists on making me every meal we’re both home for. Every day off, he brings me breakfast in bed, and he’ll even suffer through my documentaries even though his favourite thing to watch is action movies. He’s the best boyfriend I could hope for.”

“Good,” Derek says fiercely, even though he’s smiling just a little at the thought of Spencer being taken care of. “But if anything ever changes, I won’t hesitate to—”

“Spencer?” Derek’s interrupted by the door flying over, and a very harried looking Luke Alvez rushing towards the bed, seemingly not noticing the man literally threatening his death right next to him. “Oh my God, Spencer, I was so worried, I thought—”

“Hey, it’s okay,” Spencer says, voice still a little weak. Can’t he at least sound convincing when he’s trying to tell these people that he’s fine? “I’m okay, I’ll be out of here before you know it.”

“Are you sure, baby? Do I need to get the doctor? Have they been looking after you, because I swear—”

“Luke,” he laughs, interrupting his worried tangent. “I’m fine, I promise.”

He watches amusedly as Luke sags with relief. “Oh thank God,” he breathes, and it’s then that he appears to notice Derek. “Oh, shit.”

He looks to Spencer with an alarmed look in his eyes, knowing full well that he isn’t out to his team yet, but before apologies can start dripping off his lips, he rushes to fill him in.

“It’s okay. I told him.”

Luke’s face brightens in an illuminating smile, his eyes wide and happy. “You did? I’m so proud of you, cariño.”

“It’s nice to meet you,” Derek says, rising from his chair to shake Luke’s hand. “I’ve heard a lot about you in the last ten minutes.”

Luke grins. “All good things, I hope.”

Derek winks teasingly at Spencer. “Oh, better than good. Spencer here seems quite gone for you.”

He blushes again, but Luke just sits on the edge of his hospital bed and takes his face in his hand. “Well, I’m just as gone for him as he is for me. Probably even more so.”

“No way,” Spencer protests as vehemently as he can with an oxygen mask glued to his face again. “I definitely love you more.”

His words are half swallowed by the mask, and half muffled by the gaggle of FBI agents pouring into his room, all talking over one another loudly.

Luke jumps off the bed and stands to attention as they all quieten down, three of them in complete shock, one of them — Emily, recognising Luke — in anticipation of what’s about to happen.

“Uh,” Spencer starts unsurely, eyes flicking between his boyfriend and his team. “Meet my boyfriend?”

There’s a brief pause before everyone jumps into action again: Emily greeting him warmly, JJ introducing herself, and Hotch and Rossi giving him firm, threatening handshakes as a warning that no harm is to come to their pseudo-son.

Spencer knows they don’t have to worry about that, though, not with Luke, and they’re quickly shown that when he takes his rightful place sat on the edge of his hospital bed again, hands smoothing his hair gently.

“Thank you,” he says to Derek, voice soft and sincere as everyone’s sat leisurely around the room, doing their own thing now they’re calmed down after the initial meet and greet, “for taking care of him. I worry about him, you know, and it’s good to see that he has so many good people looking after him.”

“We all do,” Derek replies, looking over at Spencer fondly. “We’re all incredibly overprotective. Residual effects from him joining the team so young, probably.”

“I can see that,” Luke smiles, looking over at Hotch and Rossi, who still have their eyes trained on him, despite having warmed up to him quickly.

“Well between us all,” Emily interjects diplomatically, “I think we have Spencer covered. He has a lot of good people looking out for him.”

Spencer knows they all think he’s asleep, but he can’t help but say something. “I definitely do,” he slurs tiredly, causing Luke to quickly turn his attention to him, pressing a tender kiss to his forehead as he runs his fingers through his hair with the hand not intertwined with Spencer’s. “Love you.”

“I love you too, baby,” Luke murmurs. “And so does everybody in this room.”

Smiling softly and feeling safe as anything, Spencer finally gives into the heavy pull of tiredness, and lets himself drift off to sleep.

I'm such a sucker for coming out fics omg, I hope you didn't mind that element! But God, I've missed writing Ralvez fics. If anyone has any Ralvez prompts then please send them my way because I want to write them so badly but I really find it hard to find plot for them! <3

taglist: @criminalmindsvibez @suburban--gothic @strippersenseii @takeyourleap-of-faith @makaylajadewrites @iamrenstark @hotchseyebrows @reidology @spencerspecifics @tobias-hankel @goobzoop @marsjareau @garcias-bitch @oliverbrnch @im-autistic @anxious-enby @kuolonsyoja @ropoto

[noteguk]

for science | jhs | m

— summary; in which Hoseok hears through the grapevine that you give one of the best blowjobs ever, and he needs to test it to be sure. 

— contents and warnings; blowjob (duh), dirty talk, praising and stupid pet names, cum eating, deepthroating (the oc has no gag reflex), Hoseok finds heaven, kind of crack? Idk don’t take this seriously, college!au, hoseok x reader (with a mention of past Jimin x reader), studying sessions being interrupted in the name of science 

— words; 5,1k

Requested by anon! 

Hoseok could be kind of clueless when it came to some science-related things (and his high school biology teacher could attest to that), but one thing he knew very well was the scientific method. All that hypothesis-testing-stuff, or whatever the hell that was (okay, maybe he didn’t know it that well) had taken him out of some trouble in the past. It helped him see some of his decisions in a more experimental light, avoiding the terrible Olympic-somersault-into-conclusions that had gotten so many of his friends into awkward situations. And it shouldn’t even be said that he took quite a bit of pride in that — it made him feel very intelligent and he would take any stroke to the ego that he could get. 

So, when Jimin got a bit too tipsy and started babbling on about how you gave him the best blowjob of his life, Hoseok was, at the very least, cautiously skeptical. 

“You’re such a drama queen.” Hoseok rolled his eyes before chugging down a bit more of his beer. He was nowhere near as intoxicated as Jimin was, and he wasn’t planning on changing that. It was a Wednesday night, for fuck’s sake. He had to leave some thrill to the end of the week. “It probably was like… alright. Good, even. But the best one ever? Please.” 

“It was so much more than alright, dude.” Jimin threw his head over the couch’s back, looking like he just got washed up on the shore. His hair was a mess of clear strands, exploding on his head like a failed science fair experiment. “It was the best suck of my liiiiife. I wish she didn’t hate me so I could have that again.” 

He scoffed. Hoseok had enough filter left in him to avoid telling Jimin that the reason why you hated him was entirely his fault — what did he expect from three weeks of ghosting? Besides, if the head was that good, he would surely stick around for just a bit longer than two months. “Sure. Like the time that you almost died riding a roller coaster.” 

“Hey. I almost did.” Jimin’s eyes opened, presenting his friend with a dazed-out, unfocused brand of frustration. He was getting tired of not being taken seriously — didn’t Hosoek know that alcohol makes you more honest? He wasn’t making things up. Not when they were as serious as the well-being of his dick, or actual death. “It was some Final Destination bullshit, I’m telling you. Pieces of metal flying and everything.”

“Yeah, yeah.” He waved it off, leaning closer to Jimin so he could take the almost-empty can of beer from his clumsy hands, and placed it on the center table. “I think you’ve had enough alcohol for tonight, man. You have a class at ten tomorrow.” 

“I’m serious, dude,” Jimin pressed on. It was past eleven and Hoseok only wanted to sleep, but the other boy was clearly clueless about the lack of mutual interest in that conversation. “Aren’t you two friends or something?”

“Kind of. It’s weird,” Hoseok answered. You two had lingered in a hazy friendship space for a long time now, and he didn’t know exactly how to explain your relationship. He didn’t really consider you two close by any means, but you weren’t strangers or casual friends either. To be honest, he hadn’t thought too much about it until that very moment. “Why? What does that have to do with anything?” 

Jimin sighed, fumbling against the sofa. Much to Hoseok’s delight, he was starting to get sleepy as well. “You could ask her to suck you off,” he mumbled, “then you can feel it for yourself.” 

He laughed at that, unable to believe what he was hearing. “Jimin, you’re out of your mind if you think that’s not gonna backfire.” 

He blinked heavily. “Hm? Why?” 

Hoseok blurted out the first thing that came to mind. “We aren’t that close, and we haven’t done anything remotely sexual before this. It would be super creepy.”

“That’s not true,” Jimin spoke lazily, as if the words were starting to get hard to find. There was a pause so long after his sentence that Hoseok thought his roommate had fallen asleep. “I know you guys made out like at the beginning of the semester. Taehyung told me so.”

He was going to murder Taehyung. “It wasn’t like that. We were both drunk and it was super awkward afterwards.” Hoseok got up from the couch, leaving Jimin to groan and spread out his legs over the cushions. “Listen, I’m glad you two had fun, and I’m sorry you ruined it. But I’m not gonna ask ____ to suck me off just so I can know if you’re being dramatic or not.” 

Jimin smirked wickedly — or at least tried to, because his lack of facial control wasn’t doing him any favors. “Whatever you say,” he teased, “but I think you’re curious.” 

Truth was: Hoseok was beyond curious. The cogs in his head had started to move, and his brain was evoking lewd images of you so fast that he could barely follow. He would be pretending if he said that he never saw you under that light before, but, after the mess that was your makeout session, he had forced himself to jump into the friendzone before he managed to make things worse. 

Hoseok liked you very much, even if you two weren’t particularly close. He enjoyed spending time with you, he found you funny, smart, and way out of his league. But he wasn’t delusional enough to believe that you would actually say yes to sucking him off, especially so out of the blue. 

“I’m not curious,” Hoseok lied through his teeth, and he wanted to change the subject so much that his head was starting to hurt. “You’re gonna sleep here?” 

“Hm… yes… the couch is very comfortable.” Jimin closed his eyes and adjusted his body on the furniture. His baggy shirt was already halfway through his stomach and his pants had ran up to his waist, but the man didn’t seem to notice. “You don’t know what you’re missing out on.”

Hoseok rolled his eyes, moving towards the door. He needed to get Jimin some blankets, because the other was surely not getting up for the rest of the night. It was bad enough to babysit him for those few hours of intoxication, but infinitely worse to make him chicken soup if he got sick. Been there, done that. “I’m sure the couch is great.”

Jimin’s voice was soft and sleepy when he spoke up again. Hoseok was already in the corridor, and he almost didn’t hear him when he said, “I’m not talking about the couch.” 

Hoseok went to Jimin’s bedroom and grabbed his pillow and the blanket from his undone bed. Meanwhile, scenarios ran wild inside his head, having you as the main star. He didn’t know what was taking over him, but he wasn’t so quick to ignore Jimin’s story. Hoseok was faced with a fantastic scenario of a perfect blowjob, and the idea that it was so close to him was making his pulse quicken. Again: it would be absurd to ask you to do that, regardless of the motive behind it, and he knew that it would be awful for your already-strange friendship. 

No, he could never do that. He would not. 

But like… what if it worked, and you magically accepted his request? And what if, by some wonderful moment, some millennial alignment of planets, Jimin wasn’t actually being hyperbolic and you actually had the ability to give incredible blowjobs? Could he really let it pass without giving it a shot? 

He could see it as a scientific experiment, Hoseok thought, as a way to prove a hypothesis. It couldn’t hurt if he just— 

Oh my god, dude, shut the fuck up and forget about this. 

Coming back to his senses, Hoseok strutted out of his roommate's bedroom and walked toward the living room. By the time he came back with the blanket and the pillow, Jimin was already deep asleep.

~ 

Against his best efforts, that conversation remained stuck to the back of his mind for the next two weeks. Hoseok would find himself going back and forth on the idea of you having some strange, Marvel-worthy superpower when it came to sucking dick and, worst of all, the idea that his skepticism was making him miss out on it. Jimin was exaggerated when it came to, well, pretty much everything, but that didn’t mean that he would be wrong about that specific subject. That would be a logical fallacy, and that was also something that Hoseok knew very well. Bless his late nights on Reddit for that. 

Yet as the days moved along, and his curiosity was slowly turning into desire, he was forced to revisit the infamous night between the two of you, the one that Jimin had so mercilessly mentioned. Thinking back on it, it wasn’t surprising that your overconsumption of alcohol, added to the way that you two had grown close (both physically and mentally) had ended up with Hoseok laying on top of you, kissing the soul out of you and fondling your breasts in the middle of a party. It wasn’t the most dignified moment of either of your lives, but, well, it happened. 

One way or another, the night didn’t move forward. Even if Hoseok already had a tent in his pants, you two were far too intoxicated to consent, and were quick to fall asleep before the situation could escalate. Bottom line: Hoseok woke up with your tit in his hand, a nightmarish hangover, and the decision that the You-Subject would have to stay on hold for some time. 

And on hold it stayed. For an entire semester. And it would’ve remained that way if Jimin’s stupid mouth hadn’t started talking. 

So after two weeks of self-inflicted psychological torture, Hoseok slipped a hangout invitation amidst your texts. If you saw any second intentions behind his “haven’t seen you in awhile, wanna hangout? ;)” you didn’t let it show. The problem was that you weren’t really in the mood to go out, especially since you had a big exam coming up, so Hoseok ended up convincing you that he would stay quiet if you let him go over to your place. 

It was a bit harder not to notice the desperation in his proposal that time, but you ended up agreeing. Your thought process was that the boy would eventually realize that his hangout attempt was ridiculous and that he would leave you to study by yourself, and the two of you would reschedule that odd friendship session to when you weren’t drowning in textbooks. 

The problem was that you had been stupid enough to believe that your friend would actually keep his mouth shut. 

Hoseok was seated on the edge of your bed for so long that he was sure that his asscheeks were permanently imprinted on your sheets. Because he hated himself, he kept eyeing the digital clock to your right, and he was certain that he had spent the last fifty two minutes and thirty three seconds staring at the back of your head and trying to come up with a casual way to ask for a blowjob. 

He had tried a few times already, and each one constituted of him being unable to finish his sentence, instead looking at you like BooBoo The Fool until you turned back around to face your disorganized desk, sighing and trying to concentrate on your work. 

All things considered, he couldn’t actually believe he had escalated Jimin’s sailor tale to that point. He was out of his mind, that was a fact, and he had absolutely no clue how you would react once he (if he) found the words to ask you to sacrifice your mouth for science. 

God, he was an idiot. 

He cleared his throat and got ready to try one more time. “So… I…” 

You sighed heavily and turned around on the chair. “Hobi, this is the fifth time you’re starting a sentence and not finishing it,” you said, annoyed. “Can you tell me what the problem is? I have a test in two days and you promised you wouldn’t interrupt me if you came over.” 

“I’m sorry,” he didn’t like feeling like a kid being scolded, even if he kind of deserved that. Hoseok guessed it would be better to just take off the band-aid before he made an even bigger fool out of himself. “Let me just, like, explain the context of this. Otherwise it’s going to be even more strange.” 

Dropping your pen, you fully swirled the chair around, crossing your hands over your legs. He wasn’t expecting your complete attention anytime soon, and the seriousness in your stare made his courage falter for a second. It was such a stupid idea, you’d just end up hating him like you did Jimin. “As long as you make it quick,” you told him.  

Hoseok hesitated, running one hand through his hair. “Yeah, okay, so… like, a few weeks ago I was talking to Jimin,” he started, watching your face for any signal of an expression — confusion, disgust, anything. But he found nothing. “We were drunk, and he started talking about the time that you two were together. Like, sexually.” 

You blinked, unfazed. “And?”

“And… he told me that you give, like, the best blowjobs in history,” the words left his mouth before he could fully digest them. This time, he got a reaction out of you — a light raise of your eyebrows. “And, no offense, but I didn’t believe him. You know how extra he is about some stuff. Most stuff.” 

There was a moment of silence as you waited for him to go on, but Hoseok was too busy swallowing his thoughts down and feeling like he would collapse at any given moment. You sighed. “So what? You wanted to tell me that you don’t believe in my blowjob abilities? That’s all? Can I go back to studying now?” 

“No, that’s…” Now, things were starting to get complicated. Just take off the band-aid, Hoseok, don’t chicken out now. “I wanted to know if you could show me. Like, if you could suck me off. So I could... confirm that hypothesis.”

Every part of his brain was suddently hyperaware of how fucking stupid he just sounded. He had expected that another thick silence would follow, but his heart almost leaped out of your chest when you started laughing at him — like, full-chest, eyes closing, head rolling back laughing. “Are you serious?” You asked, taking one hand to cover your mouth before, at last, bursting out again. He felt like his ego was being stabbed with a rusty nail. “I can’t believe you, Hoseok. Took you all this time just to ask me if I could suck you off? For science?”

His mouth felt like it was full of cotton and he had to clear his throat before he found the force to answer you. “Yeah, I mean, only if you’re comfortable with it, of course,” he struggled to say, each word morphing into the next. His stomach had frozen up and the flight or fight response was starting to kick in. Had he really been that much of an idiot? When did his cock start dictating his words? “I… I know this is like, super creepy. I’m sorry. We can forget this ever happened and I’ll never talk to you again. I shouldn’t have said anything.” 

Suddenly sad, he waited as you settled back on the chair, wiping a small tear from the corner of your eye before you stared at him. There was still a smirk crawling up your lips, and he felt like the world was collapsing all around him  as the silence expanded around the two of you. He looked at the digital clock: it had taken him precisely three minutes to ruin everything. 

He sighed, shoulders falling. “Do you hate me? Why are you so quiet?” 

You bit down on your lip, your eyes narrowing as you took his form in. Hoseok was hot: point blank. He was also nice, and respectful enough to realize that he might have overstepped a few lines with his request — and, even if you couldn’t really understand it, you also weren’t bothered by it. And you certainly didn’t hate him. In a way, you were almost flattered. You would’ve been more if the comment had come from anyone else but your Danny Phantom ex. But that was a different story. 

The entire situation was just too funny to let it go. And, besides, you really wouldn’t mind sucking Hoseok off. It wasn’t as if you had never thought about that before. 

“I’m... considering it,” you told him, watching as his face lit up in a mixture of confusion and joy. He looked like a kid seeing Santa for the first time. “If you promise to shut up and let me study, I’ll do it. And if you agree to never talk about it again.” 

Hoseok blinked profusely, his mind short circuiting. “For real?” 

“Yeah.” You raised from your chair, walking closer to your bed. Hoseok swallowed hard and leaned back, placing his hands on the mattress for support. “But do me a favor: if it’s not that good, don’t tell me. It’ll hurt me.” 

“Yeah, alright.” He swallowed dry, every neuron in his brain trying to grasp what the fuck had just happened. His mind was the Spongebob office being set on fire, and he suddenly didn’t know how to deal with the anticipation booming in his chest. “I’m... not hard yet, though.” 

“It’s okay.” You kneeled in front of him, placing your hands on his inner thighs and slightly pushing them apart. Hoseok quickly got the cue, and opened a bit more so you could comfortably place yourself between them. “Just... relax,” your voice was almost a whisper then, and he felt his soul trying to leave him. That was insane. “Let me take care of you.”  

Your words managed to make him relax a bit, then he tensed all the way back at the feeling of your hands fumbling with his button. His breath hitched as you pulled the zipper down, fingers hooking on the edge of his pants before tugging them down his thighs. 

He felt exposed as his pants fell like a puddle around his ankles, his tongue coming out to wet his lips as you leaned in. Hosoek felt like he was dreaming when you started nibbling at his skin, kissing and licking his inner thighs as you slowly made your way closer to his aching member. 

“I can’t believe this is happening,” he barely got out before sighing, the tingles of your caresses on his skin shooting directly towards his cock, already semi-hard. 

You flicked your eyes up at him, humming against his thigh muscles. You were now so dangerously close to his underwear that he thought he would lose consciousness. “Were you daydreaming about it or something?” You teased. 

Maybe in a different position, he would’ve lied about it. But the truth came out before he could hold it back. “Ever since Jimin told me that, yeah,” he said. 

“Hmm… hope I live up to the expectation, then,” you purred, looking up at him with those doll-like eyes. Hoseok suddenly felt like he was losing his balance, his entire body burning in desire and expectancy. You looked like another one of his horny daydreams, but you were kneeling right there, in arms reach, and he didn’t know how he would deal with what was about to ensue. 

Your mouth was hovering above his clothed cock before he could notice and, delicately, you leaned down to place a kiss on it. The touch was tender, almost numb with the fabric standing between you two, and yet Hoseok shivered, biting down on his lip as one of your hands enveloped his erection. He watched, mesmerized, as you started lazily stroking him through his underwear, leaning your head to the side so you could place heavy kisses on him, at times giving his tip a few kitten licks until it was covered by a thin layer of your saliva. 

The sensation left him on edge, silently begging for more. By the time you moved back so you could undress him, Hoseok was a mess of shallow breaths and heavy swallows; his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down as pleasure started to build up at the corners of his perception. Biting back a moan of relief, Hoseok raised his hips as you slowly pulled his underwear downward, allowing for his cock to spring free from its confinement. You had done a good job teasing him, because it was already fully hard when it bounced against his abdomen, red-tipped and leaking. 

His gaze oscillated between your face and his cock, watching for any reaction as you took one hand to his length, squeezing him firmly. “Fuck,” he let out a grunt, his overwhelmed body responding to the smallest of touches. 

You smirked at his reaction, taking a quick glimpse at his devastated features before moving back to what you were doing. Hoseok was so cute, you thought, liking the way he was so responsive. 

A shudder ran up Hoseok’s body when your tongue came out between your lips, placing delicate licks on his base. He loved the feeling of your warm muscle against his hardened member, his mind growing eager as you began tracing a path upwards, flattening your tongue against him. His breathing was ragged by the time that you reached his crown, a hum escaping your throat as you lazily swirled your tongue around his tip, covering him with your saliva. 

You took your time caressing his slit with your mouth, waiting until he was cursing and panting before you finally wrapped your lips around him. At first, you only took his tip in your mouth, sucking so slowly that Hoseok whined and buckled his hips from the bed, trying to make you move faster. 

Wordlessly, you simply placed your palm against his thigh and pressed him back down. Even if that was the last thing he wanted to do, Hoseok accepted your order and settled back against the mattress, grunting as you continued to tease him. 

“Please, put it all in,” he begged, starting to lose his trail of thought. “This is torture.” 

And maybe another day you would have taken a bit more time torturing him, but, that afternoon, you were kind of in a rush to finish studying. So you complied. 

“Oh, fuck, fuck.” His eyes shut and his head was thrown back as you fully sank down on his cock, your tongue flat against him. Before he could stop himself, his hand flew to your hair, yanking at the strands as you moved back up, your hand pumping the parts of him that you couldn’t reach. 

“God, your mouth feels so great…” He moaned, back arching as you reached his tip once again, licking it before sinking back down — you took him just a bit deeper that time, and the motion didn’t pass by unnoticed. He was really starting to believe Jimin, and he wondered if maybe he should’ve been more worried about the entire rollercoaster situation. “Ah, that’s it. Just like that.” 

You moaned around him, the vibrations making him cry out, desperate. Hoseok couldn’t hold himself back from moving closer to the edge of the bed, his other hand clenching your bedsheets between his fingers as you continued to swallow his cock like it belonged in the hot confinement of your mouth. 

“Oh— oh my god, baby,” he grunted, pulling at the strands of your hair. His mind was starting to get hazy, his chest fluttering in a mess of sighs and heavy breaths every time that you sank down on his member; every time you flicked your tongue against his sentitive slit or pumped his base. “That’s really good, you take my cock so well.”

You looked up just to see the mess that Hoseok had turned into. With his mouth parted and eyes glazed over, he looked like he was about to fall apart at any second. He was watching you in complete awe, his eyebrows falling to form a beautiful frown of concentration; tongue coming out to lick his lips. He was so fucked out that you felt yourself getting riled up by his image, a pool of wetness accumulating between your thighs. 

“You look so pretty like this.” He exhaled, unaware of his own words. Hoseok was too busy following your swollen, redden lips as they wrapped around his member, your cheeks hollowing after you sucked him with all that you had. Even the small amount of droll around your mouth was enough to make him throb in your hold, a grunt escaping him. “With these — fuck — those pretty lips around my cock, shit. I could watch you forever.” 

You hummed around his member again at his words, the vibrations shooting directly at his core, where a rising heat had dangerously grown stronger, signaling his upcoming orgasm. Hoseok loved the way you actually looked like you were enjoying yourself, moaning and whimpering around his cock as you took all of him in your mouth, eyes closing every time he throbbed inside you. The eagerness in which you took him in, like you were starving for his cock, was one of the filthiest images that Hoseok had ever seen, and it was one that he knew would haunt his dreams for the years to come. 

When you removed his cock from your mouth with a dirty wet sound, Hoseok was about to complain before he saw you licking down his length, one of your hands holding his cock away from your face as your tongue started to play with his balls. It was an odd feeling, but not an unwelcomed one, and it kept him on edge for a little while longer while you played with him. 

With a timid whimper, you looked up at him as you licked your way back up to his tip. The image was so hot that he almost fainted, a deep moan escaping his throat when you took him back inside your delicious mouth. 

And the truth was clearer than Hoseok had ever expected: Jimin was right. 

“Fuck, babe, how did you get this good?” Hoseok grunted, trying his best to focus on the picture-perfect image of your lips wrapped tightly around his throbbing cock. He could tell that his release was starting to build up at an alarming rate, his thighs growing weaker every time you took him inside you. “Oh my- Ngh! Fuck! Oh my god!” 

Hoseok’s mind was wiped clean when he felt his tip hitting the back of your throat, his hips buckling up as your throat clenched around him. He was pretty sure he was in heaven then — if he focused, he could hear angels singing all around him — , his pleasure overtaking every cell of his body as you continued sucking the soul out of him. 

“Holy fuck, do that again,” he begged, his voice much higher than before. You didn’t need to be asked twice, because, within a second, he was crying out at the feeling of your throat wrapping around his cock one more time; his hands holding tightly to the roots of your hair. The only reason why Hoseok hadn’t started fucking your mouth yet was because he wanted to have you in control, giving him the best head of his life without any interruption. “Fuck, fuck— Baby, you’re so fucking good at this, fuck.”

There was a vague raising of his hips to meet your movements, making him hit the back of your throat again and again, the lewd sounds you were making filling the room. Nothing in his life had ever compared to that instant, he had ever felt a pleasure as great as he did at that point, and he knew it was about to snap. 

“God, I’m gonna cum,” he sobbed, finally closing his eyes and letting the pleasure take over. “Fuck, you’re so good, I’m gonna—“ 

Hoseok filled your mouth with his cum, dripping down your throat when you swallowed around him. His head was spinning and his muscles were trembling, and that time he was unable to hold himself back from thrusting up against your mouth, trying to prolong that divine sensation for as long as he could before, at last, collapsing against the mattress with a final, shaky moan. 

He barely heard you when you got up to your feet, his mind floating above his body as he tried to get himself back together. With the little force that he still had inside him, Hoseok leaned on his elbows and stared at you like you were made of gold. “Fuck, ____.” He breathed out, and the only thing he could say was, “What the fuck?” 

You giggled at his reaction, thumb cleaning a bit of cum that had painted the corner of your mouth. “I appreciate your feedback,” you teased, pointing over your shoulder, to where your desk stood, forgotten. “Now that you have your answer, can I study in peace?” 

“Y-Yeah, sure,” he struggled to say. “I’ll... stay quiet.” 

You smiled brightly. “Thanks!” 

He thought about thanking you right back for giving him the best orgasm of his life, but he thought that would make everything much more pathetic. So he didn’t. 

Hoseok eventually found the motivation within him to put his cock back inside his underwear, clumsily pulling his pants back up. He found himself in the same position he was before everything went down: dumbfounded, staring at the back of your head as you worked on your textbook. The red numbers on the clock told him that just ten minutes had passed, and yet his life had completely changed. 

All that he wanted was to return the favor — it was the fair exchange, after all. Hoseok sat up at the edge of the bed and spoke up, filled by a newfound courage. “Wait. Don’t you want me to take ca—”

“Shut the fuck up, Hoseok.” 

His mouth fell shut and his courage deflated just as quickly. Maybe another time.

[indeliblepromise]

‧₊˚ ⋅ ꒰১ ᯓ ☆ㅤ˗ˏˋㅤ𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝒎𝒂𝒏 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒓𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕. Though it was in a truly complicated way that involved a mess of dreams and memoria, he technically WAS the one that drew all of those people, including the very Nameless he had originated from for to Penacony to save it. Just as his predecessor did, he would have done ANYTHING for the Planet of Festivities. Even if it meant coming back from the dead in a weird and convoluted way.

˚ʚ ☾ ɞ˚ㅤ˗ˏˋㅤㅤMaybe he DID need a vacation. But just like the other Nameless, he would chip in and do his part in cleaning up their brand new airship.

˚ʚ ☾ ɞ˚ㅤ˗ˏˋㅤㅤAfter all that time mopping up the vast halls of The Reverie until he could see his reflection, the former bellboy was a natural when it came to the polished wooden floors of Radiant Feldspar. His duties only come to a pause when the other approaches him with a QUESTION.

˚ʚ ☾ ɞ˚ㅤ˗ˏˋㅤㅤWhat was THE WATCHMAKER like ?

˚ʚ ☾ ɞ˚ㅤ˗ˏˋㅤㅤIt was a question that came with a great weight; a story of tragedy and sorrow and yet filled with just as much love and happiness. Though little Misha had already come to terms with the TRUTH of it all, it was still a strange thing to think ofㅤ—ㅤthat aside from the spirit of the Trailblaze that they all carried, he was the last remaining piece of the Watchmaker's life left in the galaxy. He was serious about HONORING that legacy; easy to tell as he holds his mop still and thinks carefully, gathering up the memories of a life that was once his own.

˚ʚ ☾ ɞ˚ㅤ˗ˏˋㅤㅤ❛ㅤWellㅤ—ㅤThe Watchmaker was a KIND man. He cared deeply for his fellow Trailblazers and he adored the Conductor, even if he did love teasing them just as much ! He was a fantastic mechanic too and I know even now, some of his work is what's helping make the Astral Express run so well after all these years ! ㅤ❜

˚ʚ ☾ ɞ˚ㅤ˗ˏˋㅤㅤ❛ㅤI'm certain you all know this by nowㅤ—ㅤbut he was INCREDIBLY selfless too. I'm sure he didn't really want to leave the Express nor the Conductor. He knew the people of Penacony needed him thoughㅤ—ㅤand he also knew that the Trailblaze would persist even if he departed. A lot of people in Penacony really LOVED him too ! Soㅤ—ㅤhe was a truly wonderful and respectable Nameless until the very end. ㅤ❜

"Considering we Nameless own the Feldspar, it means we all have to chip in. It wouldn't be fair to leave you to it alone."

If anything, Dan Heng liked cleaning. There was something meditative about mindless, menial tasks against such a stunning backdrop. More than that, much of him had been wanting to connect with Misha, the true legacy of the Watchmaker and a member of the Nameless who deserved a connection to the Express that his predecessor had left behind.

Cool fog from the clouds caressed his face as he decided instead to join Misha in taking a side, the mop lapping wetly as he lifted it from the bucket and began mopping in long, slow sweeps.

Just what did one speak about with the legacy of the Watchmaker? The state of Penacony? Anticipation of the journeys they were due to embark upon?

"For what it's worth, you technically had a hand in that, too. Maybe you're the one who needs a vacation most of all."

A small smile flitted to Dan Heng's features, hovering close but not crowding the youth. Still, curiosity weighed heavily.

"If... you don't mind my asking, what was he like? The Watchmaker, I mean."

[datawyrms]

Half a Decade Late

Valerie was finally promoted to the main headquarters of the Guys in White. There she finally comes face to face with Phantom, who disappeared five years ago, locked in a cell. For Phic Phight 2021, @lexosaurus' prompt!

Nothing proved ’harder workers get ahead’ was only a capitalist lie than the absolute hassle getting promotions within the GIW. Of course she’d gone right to them for employment, it was the only organization large enough to actually pay people that took her resume of ghost hunting seriously. She had experience, actual knowledge and even her own gear but had still spent years getting jerked around to various small operations, basically just using her to train all their useless recruits while still just considering her a ‘fellow’ field agent. It wasn’t like she had the option to quit in protest, no one else was in the market for ghost hunters. As far as most people knew ‘ghost intelligence’ was just a joke cover story that the agents were very attached to. They didn’t want any more Amity Parks, so if she wanted to live somewhere new and still do her job...these guys were it. She’d been very clear, she wanted to be in the main office, where everything happened. That didn’t stop them from constantly assigning her literally anywhere but the actual headquarters. Maybe they finally ran out of other places, she still half expected to get stopped at the door and be told about a new field mission they absolutely needed her on immediately. It didn’t happen. Valerie Grey finally got to clock in as an Ecto Containment Officer at the main branch. Where they kept the strongest creatures, developed the new anti-ghost equipment and did more than just splattering a ghost down to nothing. Sure, she liked a good ghost obliterating, but it got boring after a while. There were only so many ways a ghost could beg for it’s useless afterlife before it became white noise. It didn’t stop any new ones from showing up, or tell her anything new. Just got rid of one pest, permanently. That wouldn’t help explain some ghosts, the powerful ones that showed up again and again. It wouldn’t explain the one that stopped showing up either. There was no way that life ruining ghost just got ‘bored’ and vanished without notice. It was still out there, plotting something. She just knew it in her bones. She had to be ready for it. There were traces of that ghost, hints of his ectosignature that she came across in the field, he was still out there. The GIW was just a means to an end, she didn’t trust them to be ready alone.

Sterile corridors and simplistic signs were expected, but even the break area was doing its best impression of a frozen tundra. Fantastic for morale? Probably not. Made the coffee pot easy to spot, at least. Even if she preferred to avoid the stuff in uniform. It stained too easily, and just made her wish for her red battle suit. She took a cup to at least have an excuse for her scoping out the place, she could pass it off to someone once she got to the containment area. A quick double check that everything was in place at the mirror before heading right back out to the winding halls. She wasn’t going to be late, she didn’t have time for that. Maybe a red tie was against protocol, but no one had been stupid enough to bother her about it yet. Judging from the deferential nods from her latest coworkers, that wouldn’t be changing. No one who worked here couldn’t know who she was. The only Ghost Hunter who got out of Amity Park without getting corrupted by the ectoplasmic monsters. It was a shame, Jack and Maddie Fenton used to be a serious force for humanity. Five years ago they suddenly flipped the script, denouncing their work and calling for peace with unreasonable fiends. Their daughter Jazz likely had something to do with it, but Valerie had her own theories. Danny, her friend and once boyfriend had gone missing around that time. Leverage to ensure the Fenton��s ‘good behaviour?’ The whole thing reeked of ghosts. To think she might have gone the same way. Back then she was actually listening to the pest, starting to really consider them a ‘good’ ghost. Like that was actually possible, when he’d just been playing to emotion and her own desire to give up in fighting a dangerous foe over and over. So much for that. That monster showed it’s true colours, sure enough. Something the GIW never bothered to look into, even as she wrote report after report about the incident, how unlikely it was for the Fentons of all people to change that drastically without constant possession. Not worth the resources, even when it was easy to see what tech was built on the foundations the couple had laid. They were throwing away so much to focus on little outbreaks of ghosts instead of making more of a lasting change. Stupid. That was what the funding was ‘meant’ to go towards, as if helping the Fentons would be less productive than making a slightly different ectogun.

She almost hoped there would be a problem, just to prove this is where she should have always been.Even if it seemed distinctly unlikely. She had to swipe to get into the lab, then yet again to actually get to the cells. Or the ‘vault’, as if the higher ups wanted to pretend the creatures in there were inert materials instead of cunning and dangerous beings. Even though they had someone posted at each door, and someone on guard inside as well, herself today. To get acquainted with the place mostly, she had more than enough training on ‘proper handling’ procedures.

“Hey, you can swap with me today, if you want.”

Valerie blinked, eyebrow already raised at the posted guard’s suggestion. “I can handle watching caged ghosts.”

They had the sense to look embarrassed, taking their hand away from the oversized ectogun to loosen their tie- which was tied rather poorly now that she got a better look at it. “I’m sure you can, it’s just, well.” They wouldn’t stop fidgeting with their tie now, eyes checking that no one was really paying attention to the guards. “H0G02 is awake today. No one likes those days.”

“Then all the more reason to get used to it early.” She didn’t give them time to sputter another excuse, swiping her card and striding past without another look. As if people should be worried about a captive ghost being awake. Maybe some of the people here never got a spine before joining up.

It wasn’t as cold as she expected it to be. Or as dark. It was actually brighter, thanks to the extra row of fluorescent lights. On some level she expected the room to reflect the monsters kept here, a shadowy icebox of a space. Of course it wasn’t. These were defeated creatures under human control, of course their cages would be bright and clean, the air warmed for human comfort. The ghosts might not like it, but why care what they wanted? It wasn’t like there were many to begin with, mostly green oversized vermin with blank red eyes. Most had the sense to cower back as she walked past, but a fair few didn’t even twitch. Calling a ghost of all things lifeless was foolish, but it was the only word coming to mind...she had to focus. She didn’t pity these things. Why so many creatures though? The real dangerous ones, the most monstrous ones were the ones that could play human, the ones that had conniving minds that only worked to cause destruction and terror. These were just feral things, annoying but hardly more impressive than a coyote when you knew what to do. Half of them she’d barely rate above ‘feral cat’. A light near the back flickered. Strange. When it flickered a second time she was already releasing her helmet to pull it on. Not nearly as easy as just willing it on, but at least she could carry it in a pocket without needing to rely on some ghost’s power. Three steps and her gun was ready, not that she expected to need it. Really, she worked on autopilot, legs still moving as she stared at the largest glass cage at the back of the room. Or more accurately, at what was in it.

“Oh, newbie. ‘Sup.” The ghost rasped out, blank green eyes watching the ghost hunter. A teenaged boy with a shock of white hair, a black jumpsuit, but the voice of a seventy year old chain smoker. Just sitting in a painfully bright cell, watching. Not exactly as she remembered him, but close enough.

“You.” The disgust was easy to voice, even as her brain struggled to catch up. He was here? Looking practically exactly as he had when she was still a soft hearted freelancer?

He only gave a sputtering laugh at the aggression. “Me? You’re not that mad about the light, are you? I’m bored, Tie.”

“What are you doing here?” That wasn’t the important question really, she should be more concerned that he apparently was able to manipulate light fixtures from his cell...but she’d been hunting after this ghost for five years. Protocol could go shove itself up the director’s ass.

“Same thing I do every day Tie, being some government property!” His laugh was wrong, not from amusement like she remembered. A desperate cackle that didn’t fool anyone. “You new enough to still have your soul in there?”

“Answer the question, Phantom.”

The smirk slid off the ghost’s face. “Wh’ad you call me? Like I’m only calling you Tie cus the red sticks out, I can call you Shooty if you don’t like it, newbie.”

The response made her insides run cold. It had to be Phantom, and the terrible sense of humour was just like him- but the ghost wasn’t quite right. What was this? It couldn’t be some copy of the ghost kid, could it? “I called you by your name, ghost.”

“Never heard of em.” The ghost crossed his legs and looked away, apparently bored of the person holding a weapon. “What day is it?”

Surely he was playing around. “What do you think your name is, then?”

He didn’t take his attention off the ceiling, looking more bored than anything.“Day first, Tie. Gotta know how much of a head start I’ve got.”

“Like you’re in any position to bargain.”

“Hm? Whatcha gonna do Tie? Let me be unconscious for a few hours? Scary. Day first.”

There was the Phantom she knew, snide and sarcastic when he really had no business being so. “I could do worse than that.”

“Doubt it. You gun grunts gotta listen to the freaks out there, remember?” His shoulders shook with a silent laughter, but it looked more like spasms. “No more mishandling the goods, yeah? Day Tie, comeonnnnnn”

Since when was he so interested in the calendar? Not to mention how weird it was how he kept referring to himself...and pretending he didn’t know his name. “It’s Monday.”

That got his attention, the casual rocking halting as he looked at her again, disturbingly still. “Monday, really?”

“Lying is your thing, not mine.”

He grinned. “I like you Tie, so you’ll probably be fired in like a week. Maybe it’s the red.” The tension left the ghost completely, she hadn’t even noticed how stiffly he’d been sitting until his spine relaxed as his elbows rested on his legs. “Pretty sure I’m H0G02. Least that’s what all your creeps call me.”

There was no way Phantom of all ghosts would call himself ‘H0G02’. He had to be a mimic of some sort, a ghost that modelled himself on the once well known Amity Park menace. “You like me because I told you it was Monday? Seriously?”

“I like the Mondays more than you, if that helps.”

“Not particularly.”

“Sounds like a you problem.” He was watching her again, more curious than anything. She shouldn’t be glad to see a spark of something in those eyes, but he was far less creepy this way.

“What’s so great about Monday? You’re a ghost.” She didn’t really care. She should be asking important questions. She was just...playing along to see if it really was Phantom. That didn’t stop her for being grateful for the helmet.

“Monday is the farthest day away from Friday.”

“Wouldn’t that be Saturday?”

“It hasn’t been Saturday or Sunday for...like four years? Those days don’t exist, I think you humans made ‘em up to prank me.” Phantom shrugged, sounding completely serious. Not even a hint of amusement or a grin. “Pretty good one, all you new guys keep it up.”

He was going to be completely useless if he kept saying nonsense. How could he be useful in finding out what happened to the Fenton’s son if he couldn’t even talk about the days of the week sensibly? “Fine, what’s so bad about Friday then.”

“Ohhhhh, you’re really new, Tie.” the ghost flopped onto his side, bored of sitting up apparently. “You know, the day they keep me around for? That day.” He wasn’t quite still, his right shoulder moving very, very carefully. Hiding something.

She didn’t have the patience for this.“What are you hiding there.”

“Tie has good eyes. Gotta remember that.” Phantom muttered, getting onto his back, a blue shard of ice melting off his arm.

“You don’t really think that some ice would help you out of there?”

“Out?” He looked mystified by the suggestion, but that could more be seeing his face upside down. “That glass doesn’t break for anything, I should know.”

Which didn’t explain why he’d been trying to hide the fact he’d made ice at all. He knew it too, but apparently playing stupid was still one of his favourite tactics. “Knock it off and just answer me.”

Phantom’s frown didn’t change, green eyes staring intently at her helmet as if hoping to see through it. “I could show you why?”

It didn’t sound like a threat. “Sure, why not. It’s gonna be a long day.” If it was? Then she’d show him that she wasn’t someone he could mess with.

Ice wrapped itself around the ghost’s lower arm alarmingly quick, a wickedly sharp blade of ice with serrated teeth jutting from the scrawny arm at an awkward angle. It was practised, something this ghost must have done often in all the time he’d been gone from her life. Yet it was so different from how Phantom usually chose to fight. That was a weapon to tear and maim, not to shock, stun or bruise. It looked wrong on him. The idea that this ghost wasn’t Phantom at all only grew more credible with that thing on his arm, even if ice powers were to be expected. His eyes flicked back to green, still fixated on her as he lifted the arm and stabbed down hard. Right into his other arm. Didn’t even blink.

“What are you doing!” She couldn’t remember the last time Phantom had ever been frightening on some primal level. This- with the disturbing snap of bone as the edges of the blade caught and tore made her hair stand on end. “Stop that, Phantom. What’s wrong with you!?”

“Cancelling Friday.” Phantom was laughing as the blade melted away into the pool of green rapidly spreading from his self inflicted wound. “I said you’d probably get fired Tie.”

“Forget Friday you idiot, cover the wound so you stop splattering everywhere!” He was just a ghost-a ghost messing with her. A ghost she’d fought with and had heard scream in pain. This...thing wasn’t him. Her heart didn’t care what her mind thought, insisting he needed help.

The ghost sat up, his left arm holding on by a shred of his suit before splattering into the puddle, but the left behind stump stopped dripping almost as quickly as he’d lost the limb. “Aw. Maybe Tie does have some soul left. You actually sound worried.”

“Of course I am! You slashed your arm off!”

“So?”

He didn’t seem to be in pain. If it wasn’t for the mess of green and the lack of a limb, she’d almost say she imagined it. Why did she care? “You wouldn’t do this sort of thing.”

“Uh. Yes I would? You just saw me do it. I’m down for an encore.”

The idea just made her feel ill. “Don’t.” Did she want this to be Phantom or not? “What the hell is wrong with you?”

“Well I’m down an arm. So the coats are going to be very whiny about how much ectoplasm they can get out of me.”

“You must have felt that.”

“Sure. Isn’t nearly as bad as when they start ripping as much ectoplasm as they can out of you. Every single Friday.” He actually rolled his eyes, like she should just know this.

Why did they bother keeping Phantom around if they just wanted ectoplasm? He might be strong, but no ghost had limitless amounts. They’d just fall apart and stop existing. That’s why the weakest ones never even left the Ghost Zone, they couldn’t survive without constantly being around the stuff! “What makes you so special then? Not your attitude.”

“I’m just lucky enough to make my own ectoplasm. Who knew food was easier to get then high grade ectoplasm? Not me.” His remaining arm pointed to her weapon, his smile stretching. “Bet ya your weapon’s fully powered from Fridays. Yours and every other thing they use in this hellhole.”

“Ghosts can’t do that.” The lie was absurd. It went against everything they knew about ghosts, even before food entered the equation.

“Y’know, Tie. I think I knew a ghost hunter that wore red once.” the ghost’s eyes went unfocused, unmoving as he looked listlessly into space. “It’s a good colour.”

“You knew me. Quit fooling around with this not remembering crap.” Valerie threw her helmet aside, no longer caring. She had to know who this ghost really was. She had to know if everything he was blathering about was a lie. So what if it wasn’t ‘safe’.

His eyes didn’t change. “Y’know how hard it is to remake a brain? Cut me some slack Tie…”

“I mean it. Look at me Phantom. If you’re the ghost I know, you can stop pretending to be something else.”

“You lose the details. Arms and legs are easy. The brain though? Way too hard.” He kept rambling to himself, not reacting even as she put a hand to the glass to get his attention. “Y’know how many times they’ve cut it open? I don’t. I lose track after like. Eleven. Maybe. Pointy Shoe said my best was fifteen but I sure don’t remember that.”

She wanted him to just stop talking. She wanted this ghost to be some strange creature she didn’t know. To not have the only possible link to someone long lost a shattered husk. “Phantom. Do you remember the hunter in red’s name?”

He finally blinked. “I’m not this Phantom guy, Tie.”

“Okay, whatever, forget that part. The ghost hunter in red, what do you remember?” She insisted, knocking again in hopes it would keep the ghost’s focus.

“Wish I’d told em something.” he held up his gloved hand as she opened her mouth to speak. “Don’t remember what that something was, don’t ask.”

So he was Phantom? He couldn’t be. That was so non-specific it could be anything. “You never explained how you’re the only ghost that can make their own ectoplasm.”

“It’s in my name Tie! Come on. Thought you guys were smart or whatever.” He did a very awkward one armed attempt at crossing it, eyebrow raised. “The H? The feeding a ghost food thing?”

She didn’t really get the whole naming scheme they used here. The fact it mattered wasn’t making her gut unclench either. “What about the H?

“Hybrid? Might have been Human. That might have been a joke.”

Valarie’s mouth was drier than any desert when he said it that easily, that casualty while kicking his own arm aside. “You’re saying you aren’t all ghost.”

“Yup. Not yet! Trust me, I’ve tried,” the bubbly high pitched laugher clawed out of the ghost at that. “I tried so much. Guess it’s another thing I’m a failure at, eh Tie?”

Something told her not to ask. She had to know. Five years she waited, five years apparently knocked Phantom clear from reality.“Does Danny Fenton mean anything to you?”

He just laughed harder at the question. “Really Tie?”

“Yes, really.”

“That’s the name I scream at em. Don’t know why. Feels good though.”

“Is it your name?” Had he had contact with Danny? Been part of whatever made him go missing from everyone’s lives? He couldn’t be, there was no way.

“They get reallllll angry when I say it is.”

There was no way the GIW had a human captive for five years. There was no way Phantom could be the Danny she knew. The ghost was just lying. He had to be, she desperately needed him to be. “Were you fused with a human or something? Got stuck when possessing someone?”

“Nah. Been like this before I got here, pretty sure. You can check your fancy gear though. There’s some non-ghost DNA in it. Lucky lucky me,” he lay back down in the mess of ectoplasm, ignoring how it clung to his hair. “Thanks for the Friday off! I hate those.”

There was no reason to need air. Talking to a ghost she didn’t even like shouldn’t make her feel like she was being crushed under a boulder. Panting for air, outside the room would make her look pathetic and weak, but she needed the space, needed to be away from that...mockery of a ghost.

“He does that to everyone. He’ll repeat the whole thing in a week or so, but he’s a really good copy the first time you see it.” The guard gave a comforting word, apparently unsurprised by her sudden unscheduled departure.

Oh, there would be no ‘next time.’ Not if he was right about her weapon. But she nodded instead, letting her ‘coworker’ think she was just overwhelmed. Even if all she could think of was how many ways this place would burn if that ghost- that thing had been a human once. She was good at telling when ghosts lied. Phantom didn’t sound like he had. No matter how much she tried to convince herself he did.

[boldlyvoid]

Amoreena | Chapter fourteen

Chapter fourteen

main summary: Heaven is a real place and it's located exactly 14.6 miles away from the FBI, Quantico Headquarters. Off behind a small park, under a fantastical willow tree surrounded by wildflowers, in every colour young minds can imagine.

Don't forget, heaven also comes with angels.

Chapter Warnings: talks of spencers major anxiety, parental death tw (not Diana or bob and Linda), trauma talks, computer hacking and new members joining the family...

word count: 4k

from the beginning <3

Taylors biggest surprise that weekend was what she had planned for Amoreena that night.

She set up a fort in the theatre room, they had every snack imaginable and any movie of her choice to watch. Karaoke in the corner, popcorn being popped in a theatre-style machine, and 3 different, matching child and adult, princess dresses for them to choose from.

It was all an elaborate plan to keep her preoccupied until bedtime, which Taylor offered to handle so that her parents could have a little wedding night date alone.

They’re all ready for a wonderful night when Spencer’s phone started ringing.

“Hello?” Spencer answers, sneaking away from the girls so he could hear better.

“Spencer, I am so sorry to interrupt you this late, but we have a situation… it’s not something that should be discussed over the phone. Do you have someone to watch Amoreena while you and Y/N come into the bureau? As soon as you can?”

His stomach drops, he feels instantly sick. “Not until you tell me who’s dead, who’s dying or who’s trying to kill us.”

“No one is, Spencer, it’s not a case or criminal related, it’s… personal, someone is here to see you,” she sounds serious and Spencer is still just as worried.

“I’ll tell the girls,” he responds before hanging up.

Y/N is standing right behind him, listening with wide eyes as she waits to soothe his panic. They worked like a well-oiled machine, she could physically feel his anxiety and in return, something about her just being there made him physically feel better.

“What’s wrong?” Taylor asks as she appears behind Y/N, Amoreena now off changing into one of the dresses she picked.

“They won't tell me on the phone but they need me and Y/N back at Quantico as soon as possible,” Spencer explained with a pale face, “we can go in the morning.”

“I’m fine watching Amoreena for the night, there’s a hanger down the road with a few of my dad’s planes, I can have someone take you to Virginia within the next hour? It's only 7 pm, I’m sure you can be back before bedtime?” Taylor offered her services for the 100th time that day, “It’s not a problem, really, and they wouldn’t call if it wasn’t serious, they’re the FBI after all.”

With that, they said goodbye to Amoreena and told her they’d be back before she woke up in the morning. If not, she had Y/N’s cellphone for the night to call them before she goes to sleep and when she wakes up, so she won't bother Taylor that early. (Even though Taylor said she wouldn’t mind early morning Amoreena cuddles.)

He was anxious on the drive to the small airport, the old man named Norman, chartering them that night was incredibly kind, they were granted lading access in Quantico and before he could prepare, they were up in the air. He chatted up a storm with Y/N on the headset radio as Spencer overthought the upcoming chat with JJ and stared out at the world below them.

On queue, he jumped from anxious to scared when they land, before getting in the shuttle from the airstrip to the front entrance, but he’s so incredibly terrified when it comes time to actually start the walk to the bullpen.

“Will you come in with me?” His small voice asks as she is pinning a visitors tag on her shirt.

“Of course,” she smiled, taking his hand as they walked into the elevator together.

He grips her hand tighter as the elevator stops, dipping and returning to the right height and making his stomach drop the same way a rollercoaster would. He hated that feeling more than anything, having it alongside the anxiety wasn’t helpful.

He can see JJ and another girl sitting together at his old desk. She’s smiling at whatever JJ says, she looks exactly like Amoreena just with box-dyed black hair that shines purple under the lighting. She’s in all black, she pushes her glasses up her nose with her sweater hiding her hands, Spencer knows she’s a foster kid from just her posture.

“JJ,” Spencer makes their presence clear and the little girl turns to him with a huge smile, running to him and wrapping her arms around his waist. “Hi?”

She’s sobbing ten and he doesn’t know why or even who she is, he lightly holds her with complete shock on his face. He stares at JJ with wide eyes and a gaping mouth as he communicates the confusion and terror with his eyes.

“This is Josephine Elliot, or Jo as she likes to be called, her parents passed away a few months ago and she recently found out her biological father was actually a sperm donor and not her moms husband,” JJ explains a little before sighing and sitting on the edge of the desk.

“She hacked into the sperm bank and found your name, and google led her to the FBI and they stopped her at the second gate, the first only let her in thinking she was your other daughter, Amoreena.”

“I’m so sorry,” the poor girl wipes her tears with her sweater sleeves, “I don’t know why I hugged you when you don’t even know me, ew sorry.”

Spencer pulls her back into a hug, “it’s okay, you don’t have to worry about wanting a hug ever again. You can have whatever you need from me.”

She cries more, holding on to his shirt as he holds her, shushing her softly and rubbing his hand over her back. It’s weird how safe she seems this early in their acquaintance with one another, but he understands it. She’s so desperate for someone related to her to love her again, to replace what she was missing from her parents, that she’s already accepted him as a father without thinking it through. Without even know what he would be like to her.

When she finally calmed down enough, Spencer led her towards the briefing room so they could have a moment alone to talk. He wanted to know her, and she needed to know him before she made another big decision. He let her know who he was, what he used to do and the rundown on his relationship with Y/N and Amoreena.

“So you met her at the park and got married a week later because you both have dead exes and somehow through fate, you made a kid together?” She summed it up in a way that made it sound ridiculous.

“Mutual trauma is a great bonding tool, I’m sure you probably listen to rock music or anything sad and angry because you know someone feels the exact same way you do? I was like that when I was a teenager. We've both lost someone we loved and then made Amoreena out of pure luck,” he combated her snarky summary with his own profile of her.

“I actually like Taylor Swift, Paramore, Evanescence and Olivia Rodrigo when I need to scream about being sad, thank you very much,” she teased him, finding a very easy rhythm as they got to know one another.

“You’re going to lose your mind when you find out who’s with Amoreena right now,” Spencer smiles, somehow everything just fits together.

“What?” She looks so confused, scrunching her face the same way he did to push her glasses up without her hands.

“It’s a long story, but essentially we were at Taylor Swift’s house when JJ called, she’s watching Amoreena still,” Spencer explained, watching her jaw drop.

“Who the fuck are you, dude?” She whispered, and it took Spencer by surprise. “Sorry, I’m so used to swearing in front of adults lately to get my point across. But seriously, you’re so interesting…”

“Understandable,” Spencer laughs lightly at her strange compliment. “I have a lot of connections, and I’ll do anything to see the people I love, smile, that includes you now.”

“You barely know me and you’re just ready to accept that I’m your kid? Didn’t this just happen to you last week?” She laughs at the insanity of it all, “you’re going to have a million kids at this rate, dude.”

Again, she calls him dude and he knows she’s just trying to distance her emotions as they grow fonder and fonder. A coping mechanism so that she doesn’t get hurt anymore, she’s lost too much and she’s not going to love him just to lose him too.

“My dad ran out on me when I was a kid, I basically raised myself when my mom’s schizophrenia got bad, I know what it’s like to feel alone even when you’re with people who are supposed to love you,” he makes sure she knows who he is inside.

“I’m sorry,” she reaches a hand out for him, holding it softly. “I never really liked my dad growing up, he always felt off… I can’t explain it, but he was never the same guy twice he was either angry, miserable or scarily happy," she explains him and all Spencer can think is how he sounds like an unsub.

"I do miss my mom a lot, I didn’t know what else to do when I found out they couldn’t have babies together and she went to a Sperm bank without telling him. I know the names of your other kids too, besides Amoreena, I’m really surprised you found her mom without hacking the system too but, yeah, Dylan is 6 and Alice is 10, they’re both in DC with the same 2 mom’s, so if you didn’t want me, I was going to see if they would cause I’m technically their stepdaughter in a weird way and if I spent one more day in that foster home I would have ended it all,” it's a Reid rant, she's his for sure.

It takes him a minute to absorb it all, “wait, Amoreena is mine for sure?”

She nods like it’s a stupid question, “could you not tell my just looking at her? The 3 of us have the same face.”

“No, they wouldn’t tell us at the clinic,” Spencer is still in shock but more so that she got into the database so easily, “how did you do it?”

“It was easy, I had all the information about the sample my mom used so I just encrypted an email to the secretary of the sperm bank so as soon as she clicked the link to read more I’d have access to her computer, they didn’t even know I was in the system, they probably still don’t know I was there,” she explains it exactly how Penelope would.

“I don’t want you to think I’d ever not want you,” Spencer holds her hand a little tighter, “I’m not sure what the process will be like trying to get the foster agency to agree to me taking you home with us, but I’ll see what I can do. We have a big house and enough room for you in our hearts if this is where you’d like to be. I’m not saying it’ll be easy, you might hate the farm life and the isolation and all the cousins you now have, but you’re a piece of me and I’m not letting you go.”

She uses her free hand to wipe her tears on her sleeve again, “please, I know it’s not going to be the same but I miss having a family so much.”

He wraps her up in his arms, he knows the feeling all too well. One day his mom was there, the next day she was gone and no one prepared him for that. She never had to do this alone, Spencer wasn’t going to let that happen to her.

“Y/N is wonderful, you’ll love her and Amoreena. We live on a huge farm and there’s a lot to do during the day and people to spend time with, believe me, you’re going to feel so surrounded by the love you won’t know what to do with it all,” he shares from personal experience.

“Okay,” she hugged him tighter, pressing her face into his neck as he talked more, feeling the vibrations of his voice on her forehead to know that he was real. That his words were true and she was going to be taken care of.

“Is there anything about yourself that you’d like me to know? Or any questions you have? I’m sure this is going to be an interesting adjustment,” Spencer asked as he pulled away, looking down into her sweet eyes and seeing the hope she was still hanging on to.

“Is Y/N even okay with all of this? It’s her house isn’t it?”

“I’m sure she’ll be fine with it, she knew I had you and the other 2 out there somewhere, we just never expected to meet you so soon,” he’s as honest as possible, talking to her the same way he would with Henry, she seemed even more mature than him.

“Can she come in here too? I’d like to get to know her as well, see if she’s really as lovely as you say she is,” she smiled, coping with her trauma the same way he and Y/N did, with humour.

Almost like Y/N could feel him thinking about her, she knocked on the door before opening it a crack, “sorry, I have some updates,” she smiled.

Josephine smiled at her, “come in.”

Y/N sat down close to her and placed her hand on her shoulder, “my sister is a foster parent, she called her caseworker and they were able to rush the emergency next of kin paperwork, you can stay with us for as long as you would like to.”

“You’re serious? You barely know me?” She kept repeating that as if she convinced herself earlier in the day that they wouldn’t want to know her.

Y/N wrapped her up in a soft hug and Spencer saw all the tension leave Josephines body as she settled against her. It had been a long time since a mother held her, she didn’t realize how much she needed it until she was in her arms.

“You’re half Spencer, so by default you have a portion of my heart now too. I’m not going to love you as an obligation or because I feel like I have to, I love you because you’re part of him and our family,” she whispers into her hair, “I know what it’s like to be alone, you never have to be... unless we’re smothering you then I get it, but you know what I mean.”

She laughed in Y/N’s arms before pulling back. Y/N held her face in her hands and looked at her gently. She ran her fingers through her dyed hair, “you’re going to fit right in with the 4 of us.”

“Four?” She repeats, wondering who else they lived with.

“I’m pregnant,” Y/N smiles as Josephine lights up.

“I’ve always wanted to be a big sister,” she cried a little, “my mom named me after Jo from Little Women, she said she always planned to give me lots of sisters.”

“If this one is a girl she’ll be Eleonora like—“

“Like the poem, Edgar Allan Poe is one of my favourites,” Jo smiled again.

Somehow, without even being there, Amoreena’s mess of glitter glue was able to patch her older sister's broken heart right then and there too.

“I read really fast, my mom said she was going to go bankrupt buying books for me,” she opened up more and more, the hurt of the memories fading as she remembered them with happiness instead of mourning.

Her mom was gone, but the love of a mother filled her space once more. Y/N took her under her wing, keeping her warm and making sure he grew to be as happy healthy and wonderful as all her other babies.

—

They arrive at Taylor's door once again at 11:30. Amoreena is sound asleep in the spare room, not even able to change out of her princess costume or phone them to say goodnight. Taylor said she had a sugar crash and just asked to go to sleep, reminding Taylor that she had the best day ever before closing her tired little eyes.

Jo was very anxious to meet Taylor too, telling her a similar story to Y/N’s from just a few hours prior. Taylor made sure she was comfortable for the night in another spare room, making her a hot chocolate and some snacks from earlier that day at lunch. She was the best host, a wonderful friend and an even better honorary godparent to these girls of Spencer’s.

“Can I have a hug?” She sheepishly asks before she has to turn down the hall to her bedroom for the night.

Spencer answers by wrapping his arms around her and holding her close to his chest once more, he wasn’t sure how his heart could hold so much love for these girls, and still have room left to make more one day. It was a dream come true to have a family this big, no one was going to believe that he gained 3 kids and a wife in under a month.

He kissed her on the forehead gently, seeing her smile at the contact let him know it was fine. “Goodnight dad,” she whispers, pressing her lips together awkwardly the same way he did before turning down the hall and disappearing into her room.

She had only a backpack of things currently, not expecting everything to go as smoothly as it did. She had enough clothes to sleep in, and Taylor happily provided some old tour perch to her just in case she needed something new to wear. Something to help her ease to sleep that didn’t feel like she was going back to her old life in the morning.

Amoreena was going to have a field day tomorrow when she met her big sister, the beautiful girl who was busy covering her scars with bandaids provided by Spencer, but it would take a lot of time, effort and care to make her feel truly healed again. It was going to be interesting seeing Amoreena adjust to sharing him so early, especially since he knew Jo would need so much more attention to ease her anxiety moving forward.

Spencer sat on the guest bed beside Y/N, noticing all the rose petals and candles on the dresser and night tables, “oh she really had a lot planned for us.”

“She’s the fairy godmother of our dreams,” Y/N agreed with a laugh. “I don’t mind staying up late tonight if you don’t mind leaving on Monday instead?”

“I was going on suggest the same thing,” he smiled at her, leaning in to press their lips together gently for the first time since the wedding that afternoon.

“let's get into our comfy’s and go for a walk on the beach, Taylor left me the keys to lock up when we come back,” she whispered the words against his lips before smiling.

“Can I call Derek before we go? I really need to talk to him,” he’s honest with her as he pulls away, feeling really anxious and shook up at the events of the day. He needed his best friend.

“Yeah, I’ll go check out the rest of the guest house, come find me when you’re done?” She says softly, getting off the bed with a smile and stepping out of the room with a small wave.

He takes his phone out and dials the number, waiting with the phone pressed against his ear as it rings. Again and again, every new hum in his ear making his heart beat faster, “hello?” He’s finally rescued.

“Have you talked to anyone on the team lately?”

“Who died?” It was everyone’s go-to question when they got a phone call like this one.

“No one, quite the opposite actually—“

“She’s pregnant!” Derek shouts, cutting him off and Spencer can hear Savannah asking who from the background.

“Well, yeah, but that’s not why I'm calling,” Spencer replies only to be met with Derek's laughter.

“Penny and I had a bet on how long it would take.”

“She cheated because she knew we were trying,” Spencer takes the fun from him, Penelope always won. “I have another kid.”

“I know man, birth is so cool— well I’m telling him anyway,” Derek is clearly talking to Savannah and him at the same time, “we’re pregnant again too.”

“No, Derek, I’m pregnant and sick as hell while you’re perfectly fine,” she snaps back at him as she takes the phone. “You better be so kind to her Doctor Spencer Reid; rub her feet, make her breakfast, thank every god on earth and the ground she walks on for being willing to make another version of you, do you hear me?”

“Yes ma’am,” Spencer hold back a laugh, wondering when Y/N would have a hormonal switch like that, “but I didn’t mean the one in her stomach, another fully formed human of my creation walked into the BAU looking for me today.”

There’s a rustling through the phone as Derek takes it back from her, “what the fuck did you just say?”

“Her name is Jo, she’s exactly a month younger than Henry and her parents died 7 months ago,” he continues without even repeating the last part, “Derek I have 3 kids now and I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“Where are you right now?”

“In Taylor Swift's guest house.”

“Spencer, be serious with me, are you doing drugs again?"

“Ask Penelope, she contacted Portia, Rossi’s stepdaughter, who contacted Taylor so I could help Y/N and Amoreena meet her, then JJ called and made us fly all the way to Quantico and now I have 2 children living with me and one on the way. Not to mention, child 1 is extremely jealous about sharing me with people and hasn’t even gotten accustomed to being a big sister, and child 2 is so traumatized she hacked the fucking sperm bank and explained it to me like it was as easy as making a sandwich. I am in over my head here, Derek.”

“Okay, that sounded more like Spencer Reid,” Derek’s calm and happy voice calms him slightly and prompts him to take a deep breath. “If she’s able to hack she’s most likely like Penelope, we can introduce them. She’ll need someone who understands the loss of a parent. Amoreena, on the other hand, you need to spend a day with just her. Take her to the movies, or to see a play or something. Let her know she’s always going to be your little girl no matter how many siblings she gets.”

“Thank you, I needed someone who wasn’t my overly optimistic wife to tell me if I could do it,” he’s overly honest, Derek is his person and will always be his person.

“I get it, thanks for calling me, I’m really glad you’re okay,” he can hear Derek's smile and all he wants is a hug from him. “How was the wedding?”

“Good, we all cried a lot,” he laughs then, “we were supposed to have a big dinner on the beach before we got called into Quantico, so I’m going to go spend time with her now, I love you, Derek,” he rushes the words out so he doesn’t get overly emotional.

“I love you too, Spencer, have a good night,” Derek hands up before they both get too emotional. They always had a knack for making the other cry in times like this.

He lets out a deep sigh before tossing his phone on the bedside table. 3 of his 5 kids were here with him and Y/N now, safe and sound. If anyone else needed him, they could wait.

tag list: @shemarmooresfedora @spencers-dria @spookyspence @reidsfish @manuosorioh @mochionly @samuel-de-champagne-problems @jswessie187

@k-k0129

[jokerscrazybrilliant]

Survive - Chapter 2 - (Captain Rex)

Chapter 1 · Chapter 2 · Chapter 3 · Chapter 4

Story on other platforms:

Quotev · AO3

________

“Master Kenobi,” I bowed my head to him as I entered the briefing room, reciprocating the smile he gave me.

“Hello Nimra, I hope you’re doing well today?” Master Kenobi was, as always, kind and warm, I had only heard about him before being assigned to Master Skywalker but now that I had met him, I wished I could’ve gotten the opportunity to learn from him sooner.

“Well, I’m glad the two of you are getting along.” Anakin commented, seeming to feel ignored. I smirked as I turned to face him, bowing deeply and exaggeratedly.

“Master Skywalker, you’re important too!” I grinned as Obi Wan laughed behind his hands at my teasing.

“Very funny Nim, we’re actually in the middle of a debriefing if you hadn’t noticed.” He gestured to the conference table where Captain Rex and Commander Cody of Obi Wan’s 212th battalion stood.

“Gentlemen,” I greeted as we joined them at the table, earning a polite nod from each in return. “My first mission?” I turned to ask Anakin, unable to hide my excitement. It had only been a few days onboard Master Skywalker’s ship, but that paired with my time on Coruscant, I had been out of the action for far too long.

Anakin shook his head at me with a small smile, “Not for you, not a mission. Just routine inspections of the outer rim outposts.”

“However, I think it would be good for Nimra to join the captain and Commander Cody. I believe it will be good for her to familiarize herself with the standard procedures and how these bases operate.” Master Kenobi said, stroking his beard in thought.

Anakin shrugged at me. “It won’t be too long, and as long as the commanders don’t mind, I don’t see anything wrong with it,” he looked to the clones in question.

“We don’t mind at all, General.” Commander Cody said, giving me a small nod.

“Alright then, that’s settled. You three can get underway then. And don’t forget to check in.” Master Obi-Wan said, then turning to analyze some information on screen.

Anakin pulled me aside before letting me follow them out. “I know you’re here to learn from me, Nim, but these clones have more experience than you and I combined. Make sure you show them the respect they deserve, and use this opportunity to learn from them, as well.”

I bowed my head respectfully, showing him I understood. “Of course, Master.” With that he gave me a pat on the shoulder and a small smile and headed to Master Obi-Wan.

“Have fun!” He gave a wave over his shoulder, and I smiled and walked out to catch up with the commanders.

I might’ve been offended that Master Skywalker felt the need to tell me to be respectful to the clone commanders, but I had heard enough comments from my peers to show that not all Jedi, and not all people, were as respectful as they should be towards our soldiers. While they fought valiantly and gave their lives to protect us, we had people insulting them, and viewing them as less-than. I couldn’t stand that, I had ended friendships with such disrespectful people, and I just couldn’t understand where they were coming from.

Shaking these thoughts out of my head, I quickly made my way to the hangar, not wanting to be left behind.

***

Inspecting the bases was very, very far from interesting, and I huffed as we finally settled in the ship, setting the route for the final base we had to check, the Rishi Outpost. It was definitely a learning opportunity, but I felt like I was back in the classroom, learning all sorts of codes and procedures I needed to have memorized. However, thankfully I didn’t have to do very much, rather I just observed, Commander Cody taking the lead on all the inspections thus far.

I could see how the commander and Master Obi-Wan got along, both of them having a high regard for protocol and rules, whereas Captain Rex was a little more flexible to adjust more to Anakin’s… unique way of doing things.

“You doing alright, commander?” Rex turned to look at me in the small open cockpit, smirking slightly at my slouched posture in the chair.

Giving him an expression that should’ve fried him where he was, I sat up straight, cursing him in my mind. “Fantastic, captain.” I forced the most polite smile I could muster.

“Good.” I didn’t miss the amusement that shone in his eyes, making me thankful I had been assigned to this particular battalion. I wasn’t sure I would’ve made it with Cody’s more serious personality.

“I’m going to contact the Generals, let ‘em know where we’re at.” The commander in question spoke up, gaining both Rex and I’s attention.

I nodded. “Good idea, commander.”

Me and Rex watched silently as Cody opened the frequency to contact Master Obi-Wan. “General Kenobi, General Skywalker,” Commander Cody greeted as they appeared in the transmission.

“Cody. How goes the inspections?” Obi-Wan asked.

“The tracking station at Pastel is fully operational. Captain Rex, Commander Nimra and I are proceeding to the outpost in the Rishi system.”

“Good. Report back once you’ve arrived.”

“Copy that. Cody out.” He ended the transmission as Rex set the ship into hyperspace.

“How long to the Rishi outpost?” I asked

“Feeling tired sir?” Rex turned his head to eye me in question.

“No of course not, I just want to know so that I can prepare myself.” I glowered at him.

“It won’t be a long ride, commander, Rishi isn’t far from here.” Commander Cody piped in.

“Thank you, Cody.” I gave him a sweet smile, wanting to be on his good side since he and Master Kenobi were friends.

“Not a problem sir.”

***

The trip to the outpost really wasn’t far and I was excited for the boring protocol checks to come to an end. Commander Cody signaled the base as we made our approach. “Rishi Outpost, this is Commander Cody, do you copy? Rishi Outpost, please respond.” My brows furrowed as it took them a while to respond to our hails.

“Sorry, commander, we’re experiencing technical difficulties.” A voice responded from over the comms.

“This is the inspection team,” Cody responded.

“Inspection? Negative, we do not require an inspection. Everything is fine here, thank you.” I shared a look with Rex at this strange response. They knew to expect us, and they were speaking with a superior officer, so what was with the unwillingness to comply?

“We’ll be the judge of that. Prepare for our arrival.”

“Roger, roger.” At this Cody shut off the comm, looking uneasy.

“Something’s not right here.” Rex commented, frowning as we approached the landing pad.

“Well, good luck. I’m putting you in charge of this one. I know Commander Sayla has been taking notes, let’s see how well you’ve been paying attention.” Cody said to Rex, me smirking at him behind Cody’s back teasingly.

“Well, you two go ahead, I’ll join you in a moment, I’ll just contact Master Skywalker and update him on our whereabouts.” The two men nodded at me before exiting the ship, leaving me to turn on the comm, tuning in to the correct frequency to reach Master Anakin. A small frown formed on my face as I was met with nothing but static.

Confused, I turned to follow after Rex and Cody. They were talking to an officer out on the deck. A flare showed in the sky, briefly catching my attention before I turned back to see Rex pulling out his pistol, shooting the officer in the head. “Rex are you mad?!” I shouted, running up to the two quickly.

“Relax, commander,” Rex responded, unconcernedly. He reached down and pulled off the dead officer’s helmet to reveal the faceplate of a droid, but not an ordinary battle droid. “Just as I thought. Looks like one of those new commando droids.”

“That flare must have come from the survivors.” Commander Cody noted.

Shots rung out around us as more of those droids revealed themselves, and they had us surrounded. Well, this is going well, I thought to myself sarcastically. “Ambush!” Rex shouted, moving back to find cover.

“Really? And here I thought it was just the welcome party.” I responded over the noise of fire, deflecting bullets to cover the two soldiers behind me.

“Those clankers have tough armour!” Cody commented frustratedly.

“Yeah, I never thought I’d miss those lousy B-One battle droids!” I responded, wanting to laugh but finding it difficult with all the shots I was taking. The droids had caught us unawares and had us completely surrounded, boxing us in between several storage crates and coming at us from all directions.

“We’re cut off!” Rex shouted between shots. Suddenly more commandos came out from inside the base, tossing handfuls of detonators in our direction. While I found it slightly flattering that they felt it necessary to devote so many explosives to destroying us, it also left us a very small chance of surviving the explosion. “Off the platform!”

“You don’t have to tell me twice!” The men jumped before me and I quickly followed, unsure of what I was diving into, but I had no time to think if I wanted to make it out of the small area before being blown to bits. Before I could fall too far, I felt the wind knocked out of me as someone grabbed me around the waist, stopping my descent.

“I gotcha, commander.” Rex spoke into my ear, causing a warmth to rise to the back of my neck.

“I appreciate the sentiment captain, but you forget, I’m a Jedi.” I turned to look at him with a crooked grin. “I have these cool magical powers that allow me to catch myself before I go splat.”

“Of course, commander.” I didn’t miss the amusement in his voice as he let go of me, and I landed gracefully on the ground, watching as the two soldiers lowered themselves using their cables.

“This certainly complicates things, commander.” Rex addressed Cody as we took in our surroundings.

“No worse than that time on Tibrin.” Cody responded lightly.

“We had the Generals with us on Tibrin. They helped.” My brow raised at how quickly he dismissed my presence. That paired with how he caught me when he certainly wouldn’t have caught Skywalker made me think they didn’t realize what I was capable of.

Well since you don’t think I can help, have fun on your own, I thought to myself, slightly annoyed. Master Kenobi and Anakin had sent me to observe and learn, after all. So that’s what I would do.

The approach of three unknown clones drew our attention and pulled me from my thoughts. I could feel their force signatures, and they were indeed clones, but I didn’t cut in to say that as Rex demanded them take off their helmets. They took them off, albeit confusedly, and introduced themselves as Fives, Hevy, and Echo. Rex and Cody introduced themselves, and me, and I gave a little wave from my spot in the back, but remained silent.

It was interesting to see the way they dealt with these younger clones. It was a new side of Rex I hadn’t yet seen. I stayed with my arms folded across my chest, leaning against a wall of the cave even as a giant eel like creature attacked, watching with only mild interest as the captain took it out with one shot. I was more interested in the young ‘shinies’, as Rex called them.

They were young and inexperienced but they had a firm determination that was refreshing to see. I walked in the back alongside Echo as we found better ground. “So, you’re a Jedi, sir?”

“Almost,” I responded with a warm smile. “Have you met a Jedi before?”

He nodded. “General Shaak Ti helped train us on Kamino. Without her belief in us, me and my batchers would never have succeeded.” He clearly had a lot of respect for her, and it made me smile to see.

“Of course. I have only met Master Ti a few times but she seems very wise.” Our conversation came to an end as we quickly climbed up closer to the outpost.

“Look sharp, rookies. As long as those tweezers occupy this post, our home planet of Kamino is at risk.”

“But there’s so many of them.” Echo’s nervous comment made me smile. They really were shinies.

“Doesn’t matter, kid. We have to retake this base, so we will retake this base!”

“And how do you propose we get through those blast doors, Rex, old boy?” Cody turned to look at Rex.

“I have a few ideas.”

He didn’t share his idea until we took out all the droids on the platform, me taking care of the stragglers before they could call for backup or notify anyone to our presence. But his brilliant idea was… well I could see how him and Skywalker got along, or perhaps they had spent too much time together because his idea was a very poor plan I could see Skywalker coming up with.

“This is never gonna work.” Cody sighed from beside me, making me chuckle and nod in agreement.

“I mean I could’ve just sliced it open with my lightsaber but I figured I’d let him have his fun.” I commented as we watched the captain faking taking off his helmet and holding up a decapitated droid head up in its place.

To our collective surprise, the blast doors opened, his plan succeeding. These droids might’ve had tougher armour than the standard B-One but they certainly weren’t much smarter. “Clones!” One called out in surprise, far too late, unfortunately for them.

“Roger, roger.” The captain responded coolly, shooting at it before we all jumped out and dismantled the rest of the droids. “Right, let’s move.”

“Permission to take point, sir?” Hevy asked, no doubt excited to be seeing some action.

“I’malways first, kid.” Rex responded, making me grin.

We were able to overtake the base quickly, Fives and Echo making me laugh as they argued over who got the kill on a droid. “Sorry Echo, that one really was Fives.” I gave him an apologetic smile.

“Get to the window. It looks like we have more visitors.” Commander Cody pointed out at the sky.

“It looks like a Separatist fleet.” I frowned at the sight above us. This was not good.

“That’s why they commandeered this outpost. They’re mounting a full-scale invasion,” Rex stated.

“Can we get a message out?” I asked.

“No good, they’re jamming all other communication and they’ve hardwired the all-clear signal. It’ll take too long to fix. And we’ve got company.” Rex pointed to the shuttle full of droid reinforcements that was making its way to us.

“Well buddy, you always said you wanted to be on the front lines.” Fives nudged Hevy lightly.

“We can’t protect the outpost long against that army of clankers.” Hevy said, turning to look at Rex.

“Then we’ll destroy the outpost instead.” My brows raised at this idea. It certainly wasn’t orthodox but it would cut off the all clear signal, which would capture our fleet’s attention.

Rex quickly got everyone on board with the idea and Echo came up with a solution on how we would manage to destroy the base itself, a plan quickly coming together. He really is a great leader, I thought to myself as I watched Rex divide the men into teams.

“Are you alright to go with Hevy and the boys to hold off the clankers, give us more time?” The captain asked me, fully aware that while he was in charge, I was above him in rank.

I nodded. “Of course, captain. Don’t worry about me.” I gave him a little smile as I followed after Hevy to the building’s entrance.

“Reinforcements reporting. Open up.”

Hevy opened the blast doors, blaster canon at the ready. “Didn’t say please.” He quipped, opening fire on the droids.

I laughed as I dove in front of him, deflecting bullets to cover him and taking out as many droids as I could reach. Many more took their place and I cursed at General Grievous in my mind, there was no doubt that he was behind this. “Just some routine inspections, they said, just to pick up some standard procedure. Yeah right.” I muttered, swatting away battle droids with my lightsaber as I grumbled to myself.

“Time to go commander!” Hevy called to me. I nodded at him and quickly jogged inside, still deflecting laser bolts back at the enemy. Quickly the blast doors sealed behind me and we made our way back to the command centre.

“Rex, time’s wasting.” Cody called out as we entered.

“Almost ready. The handset isn’t linked up with the detonator. Hevy.”

“Yes, sir?”

“This detonator isn’t working.” Rex said, handing it over to him.

“I’ll take care of it. It’ll be fixed in no time. You guys get out of here.”

“Just make it fast. Those droids are getting close.” Rex opened the ventilation shaft, gesturing for me to enter it first.

“I’ll wait, I’ll go last,” I opposed.

“Please commander, we’ll be right behind you. Besides, if you get hurt on my watch, the General won’t let me hear the end of it.” He made me laugh lightly.

“Fine then. Hurry up, all of you.” I quickly made my way through the tunnels, exiting and trying to find a good vantage point to watch the sky from.

The rest of the team was right behind me, and Rex looked up at the base. “Hevy, hit the – where’s Hevy?” I quickly turned at his words, noting that Hevy was indeed missing.

“He must still be trying to fix the detonator!” I quickly turned back and tried to make my way up the slope we had just come from, the rest of the team trying to get a hold of Hevy. He just needed to wait, I would be right there. Before I could clamber back into the ventilation shaft someone yanked me back by the arm, holding me back.

I watched in horror as the base exploded before me, debris flying everywhere, flames erupting from the pipes in front of me, nearly reaching my face.

I stared into the flames for several moments, face blank, before turning and walking away, the arm that had held me back finally letting go. How many lives now? How many lives had been given to save my own?

I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply through my nose, the smell of smoke and scorched metal filling my nostrils. Trust in the will of the force, I repeated the line to myself. Quieting my mind, I turned back to the group, putting a reassuring hand on Echo’s shoulder as he looked up at the flaming base. “Hevy always did hate that place.”

Our own fleet appeared in the sky momentarily, clearly getting the message that something was wrong, and gunships quickly appeared to pick us up. Suffice it to say I was more than eager to get off that rock.

“So, what have you learned from your trip, Nim?” Master Skywalker asked as I joined him in the hangar bay.

“That you and your captain deserve each other.” I joked with a grin, earning a laugh from Anakin and a look from the helmeted captain himself.

“I’ll take that as a complement.” Anakin responded.

“You should.”

***

After a small ceremony indicting Fives and Echo into the Five Hundred and First and awarding them on their bravery and success, there was a small informal celebration in the mess hall. We had staved off an invasion on Kamino, and we had two new recruits, so there was some celebration to be had. However, I knew Fives and Echo had the recent events still in their minds, and someone else who was nowhere to be found.

Making my way back to the hangar bay I found the captain sitting in a corner on a workbench, helmet on the floor in front of him. I came to a stop before him, unsure if my company was welcome or unwanted. Several moments passed before he spoke.

"I should've stayed behind and made sure they all got out. I should've known he'd try something stupidly heroic." His head was in his hands, elbows resting on his knees as he stared at the floor hollowly.

I sighed, sitting down on the bench beside him, staring ahead as I fell into my own thoughts. "It's not easy, when I think about all the people who have given their lives to save me. So many soldiers on the battlefield, like Hevy, like my Master," My voice broke at the mention of my old Master. Talking about him still brought up so much pain, and so many memories I tried to forget. "Some days I feel like I wasn't worth it."

"And other days?" He looked to me questioningly.

"I realize that it was never about me." I said, giving him a small smile. He nodded at me, considering my words. "When those people give their lives, it is because they are selfless. It is because they want to save lives so desperately they are willing to sacrifice anything. In that moment they are not thinking about me, and whether or not I am worth it. They are only thinking about saving anyone they can." I let myself speak my thoughts aloud, needing this conversation as much as he did.

"We should do our best to live well. To honour their sacrifice."

I looked at him thoughtfully, drawn to his dark golden orbs that held such meaning. What had those eyes seen? What emotion did they harbour? What knowledge did they hold?

I resisted the urge to sigh wistfully as I looked into his eyes, wishing I could know what they hid. "And so we shall." I gave a small smile and stood up, gesturing towards where the others were. "Now let's go celebrate the newest additions to the five hundred and first."

[elphiej]

Be My Light - Chapter 4:   The Mad Leader

*Genre: Mafia, angst, eventual smut, slow burn

*Warnings: References to violence, minor assault, 

Author’s note: First off, I’d like to send a special Thank You to someone who was a huge inspiration to me and to this story. This is the chapter that really started it all and I was inspired by @bangtan-sonyeonddaeng  ‘s mafia reaction series. She is a fantastic person and was one of the first people I showed this Be My Light to when I was too scared to post it. She is a beautiful soul and wonderful writer. Thank you for the push. 

Another Big thanks to my editor for sticking with me all this time and into the future. And, of course, to all the people who are reading, commenting, and reblogging this. I can’t tell you all how much is means to me. Thank you all and I hope you enjoy this next installment of Be My Light. (P.S. I have a thing for RM in a long trench coat.)

Tag list:  @lolalalooo @bangtan-sonyeonddaeng, @barbikatherine , @mrsfortune1306 , @lovesick-heart0 , @iamnamjoonsbxtch , @deathkat657 , @deeepvibes , @sugamonster22 , @weiinihao, @hemmofluke , @rainbow-zebra-unicorns , @joyfullyobsessed , @elvencantation , 

                                   Chapter 4: The Mad Leader

              You stared at the cell phone clutched in your hand, your mind spinning with so many questions. Who were those people? Why did talking to this ‘RM’ make you feel like something bad was coming? With that deep, serious tone, were they just as dangerous as the man with the cane? And what kind of normal person calls themselves ‘RM’? Agust was already on the edge of interesting and odd as it was. Scanning over the still lit screen, you wondered what other names were in the contact list. Other than ‘God of Destruction’, the last few calls you could see without going through the device belonged to ‘Mochi’, ‘My Favorite’, and ‘Worldwide Pain in my Ass’. Based on those names, you couldn’t begin to imagine who was gonna match those names.

               It was safe to assume that this RM guy was concerned about the man in the suit trying to finish the job. The hospital had a good security team but you thought it best to talk to Doctor- Henry- to see if more could be done. Your hand paused as it went to put the cell phone back with Agust’s things; if RM or any of the odd named voices tried to contact you for an update, they would most likely call that, instead of trying to navigate the hospital switch board. Figuring it was the best option, you placed the phone safely in your scrub’s pocket as you moved to the bedside for one last check on the patient. Agust hadn’t moved again since right before the phone call and was still as could be. The monitors were all reading normally. There was a blood transfusion line in his arm to help replace what he had lost, along with another IV pushing fluids and medication. You adjusted his arm to make it more comfortable for him once he woke up.

               “I’ll be back to check on you as soon as I can,” you said as you fixed his blankets. “Please, try not to do anything until I get back.”

               You slipped out of the room and pulled the door shut behind you. There was an anxious feeling that crept back into your gut, the same one you felt when you had first heard the gun shots ring out from the silence of the construction site. Your mind had so many thoughts and scenarios running through it that you felt overwhelmed. Things like, ‘what if the man with the cane and rough voice came here? Would he shoot his way through the floors until he found Agust? Were you really as safe as you hoped?’ The hospital had been under a few threats but nothing had ever come from those except words. It would be best to stay as cautious as possible. You had too many friends and patients to not take your feelings seriously.

               As you made your way towards your station, you were surprised to see that Henry was already there leaning over the desk with the phone pressed up against his ear. He pulled a pad of paper from the other side of the desk and started scribbling something down as he nodded and spoke in a low tone to whomever was on the other end. That saves me from having to page him, you mused. Henry did a double take towards you when he noticed you out of the corner of his eye. He beaconed you over with an urgent wave of his hand. The calm yet awkward demeanor from earlier had been replaced with a more serious one. Once you were within an arm’s reach of him, he reassured whomever he was talking to that ‘everything will be taken care of’ and hung up.

               “Good,” he said, placing a hand on your shoulder, “I need you to help me.”

               “Henry, about that John Doe patient. I was able to talk to someone close to him. I think we may need to alert the security team about- “

               “I’ve already talked to them. The hospital is going on alert for any suspicious activity entering the hospital. And we are actually moving the patient to one of the private units upstairs. I just got off the phone with the director and we’ve got everything worked out for you so you’ll be safe,” he said over his shoulder as he started walking down the hall.

               “Wait, what does that mean? What do you mean by worked everything out?” You took extra long steps to keep up with his brisk pace.

               “The same person who demanded higher security for that patient requested that you be kept with him as his private staff until otherwise. Which means you’ll be in the secure ward with him in case anything happens. It’s gonna be for the best. You were the first one with him and it’s gonna be more comfortable if he doesn’t have to get acclimated to someone else after all this. Don’t worry, we’ve got it worked out with Jax already.”

               Henry led you back into Agust’s room and made fast work of disconnecting him from the machines that surrounded him. He pulled the IV bags down and placed them on the bed by the still form. Meanwhile, you were frozen at the end of the bed, feeling dizzy from how fast he seemed to expect you to understand what was happening. This wasn’t the first gang related case you had been assigned to since starting at Mercy, nor was it the first gunshot case; why did this sudden change to the routine make you feel ever more nervous? Never had you moved a patient into a secure wing designed from more severe or quarantined patients before just because someone had requested it. Henry called your name to shake you from your thoughts and motioned you to move to the side of the bed as he unlocked the wheels of the gurney and pushed the bed from the wall. As you helped guide it from the room, you couldn’t help but feel the tension grow.

               “So, I am just supposed to stay locked up in some room like a prisoner? And be someone’s private nurse? What about the rest of my patients here? I can’t just leave Amber to tend to them all alone. We are short staffed as it is,” you mentioned as you navigated everyone into the elevator at the end of the hall.

               Henry hit a button and the elevator started to move. He leaned close to look you in the face, his eyes filled with seriousness. “Listen, Y/N, I know this is strange but you just have to trust me. I don’t know all the details but someone particularly important has to be involved to make the director so quick to comply with whatever they asked. But no matter what, your safety is my priority, maybe a bit more than my patients. I’m sure the director thinks that too. Whoever it is must just want to make sure this guy has the best care possible. And when he gets here, he’ll probably want to hear from you what happened. And if whatever gang did this does try anything, I don’t want you to worry because no one is going to get to him or you. Only the director, you, and I will have access to this room or know where he is. Apparently, the man the director talked to said he would have a way to get a hold of you and prove his identity to gain access. I know how you are, Y/N, you are a great person. That’s why you’re so good at what you do. But don’t think that you are inconveniencing anyone; Jax has already rearranged everything and made some calls. I really need you to think about yourself now. And what is best is for you is to do what I am asking and not over think this right now.”

               Henry was being so sincere that you couldn’t find the voice to make any arguments. You gave him a weak nod and tried to take what he said to heart. As Amber had pointed out before, one of your qualities was that you put others well before yourself. Hence, why you were in this predicament. As the doors opened onto the new floor, you promised him that you would try.

               The door opened onto a floor where the more severe, long term patients were kept. This floor could, also, be used for quarantining or the more delicate of patients. At the moment, you knew it had only a few occupants: a coma patient, a patient suffering from extreme burns, and someone from the psych ward that needed more focused attention. To enter this ward, you needed a key card, making this more isolated than your full and frantic floor. Henry commented there was no record that Agust had been moved in any of the files. And if anyone tried to look him up, it would be like he never existed. The person who had called to make all this happen had said he’d contact you and that he and his colleagues were to say they were here to perform community service if asked by anyone else. Apparently, they deemed it as security protection. Henry had you swipe your ID to gain access to the floor and you made your way down the silent hall to the vacant room Henry had staked out for you to stay in. The room was bigger than the one you were used to on your floor. There was a small couch across from where the bed was to go, a private bath off near the entrance, and even a TV in the corner. There was, also, a small recliner near where the head of the gurney was to rest. You imagined you’d be there most of the time. Henry helped you set everything back up in the room and did a quick check on the patient after he was secured in his new residence.

               “Hopefully, he’s gonna wake up a bit soon. He’s reacting well to what I’m doing,” Henry commented as he checked Agust’s pupils constrict as he shined his pen light in them. He gave some instructions about his IV and transfusion processes. He gave you a quick run down of the floor in case you needed anything. “Until he wakes up, I guess feel free to do whatever in here. It can be like a mini vacation. You know, if you ignore all the weird stuff happening. You can watch some TV or order some food. The mysterious man said to spare no expense when it came to our patient or you. I promise by Friday this will be all over and we can go out and talk about nicer things. Okay?”

               Before you could stop yourself, you felt your cheeks get hot and you turned your eyes to the floor. This was not the best place for this, but you knew Henry did it to only ease the anxiety you were feeling. He was almost too perfect. Henry promised to check in once he had finished his rounds as he left from the room and pulled the door shut behind him. You heard the security lock click into place, knowing it would only open from the inside or if you had an ID card. You allowed yourself to drop into the recliner, allowing everything to wash over you. Paranoia was thick in the air as you tried to make sense of everything. Henry was right; whoever these people were they must just want to talk to you and this was easier than scouting the halls. But the thought did very little to chase the nervousness away. Your hands started to rub together out of tension, squeezing your fingers, cracking your knuckles one by one with your thumbs. You took a few deep breaths as you tried to force yourself out of the impending panic. Your eyes looked over at the bed. You tried to remind yourself that you needed to keep it together and be strong for him. Then your eyes landed on his hand. You remembered when you were hiding behind the counter when the man with the cane was getting closer and closer. And when Agust had reached over and squeezed your hand. In that moment, he gave you reassurance with such a small gesture, not thinking of himself. You remembered how genuine it felt. It’d be nice if you could do that now, you thought with a weak smile.

               Instead, you settled for forcing yourself to think of something else. You read through his charts, tapped through some news on your phone, and tried to people watch out the window behind the couch. The afternoon sun had started making its way towards the horizon; how quickly the day had ended up flying by. You had decided against turning on the television for now, thinking how awkward it would be for him to wake up to you watching some trash TV show. You tried walking around the room to get a sense of where you’d be staying for the foreseeable future. But all of that only killed twenty minutes and you were still stir-crazy. There wasn’t much you could do for Agust at the moment, except allow him to rest without you trying to hold his hand or anything else.

               Suddenly, there was a buzzing in your pocket; it was Agust’s phone. You were a bit ashamed at how quickly you reached for it. There was a new text message. It was from a new named contact: Sunshine. The preview of the message said, ‘To Miss Nurse’, making your assumption that the people on the other end would have expected you to keep the phone on you correct. And since it was addressed to you, you didn’t feel too bad about opening the phone again. You swiped open the text and tried not to scroll anywhere higher into their previous chats.

-          Sunshine: To Miss Nurse. if you see this, please take good care of our Hyung. And if he gives you any trouble, tell him I said to behave. RM should be almost there. He tends to speed.  

               There were a couple silly emojis next to it that made you smile. Surely, they can’t be bad people if this is how they communicate. They must be close friends. Though, you still wondered how they had gotten the director to do all this. Maybe there was someone else doing all of this? You shook your head and typed a quick message back, so not to have them worry.

-          I’ll take good care of him. That’s my job.

You really hoped Agust didn’t mind you messing with his phone. Though, you figured it was better to ask for forgiveness than permission in this scenario. There was no response which made you think that it was all he needed at the time. Gazing at the clock on the phone, you had wasted thirty minutes in the room so far. You thought of your backpack in the locker room a few floors down and some of your things at your stations that you could pass the time with. Since Agust was secure here, you thought it may be a good idea to gather some things to help you waste time until this RM shows up. It was unlikely that Agust was going to wake up yet, and you could be fast so he wouldn’t be alone for long. You slipped the phone back into your pocket and rose from the chair, heading for the door. You cast one more look at the still figure in the bed before dimming the lights and pulled the door shut behind you.

               You set off at a brisk pace for the elevator and took it down a few levels to where the staff locker room was kept. You raced in, pulled your bag from your locker, and left before anyone noticed you. You were sure since the director had put the whole hospital on alert that everyone was making rounds to keep eyes everywhere. You hoped grabbing your stuff from your station was just as easy; you weren��t sure about how to explain why you had suddenly deserted your station. Amber wasn’t there but you could hear her and Jax talking loudly from a back room. You wanted to talk to your best friend, to help ease some nerves and have her tell you exactly what you needed to hear. But you didn’t want to wait around or take her away from her new workload. You pulled open the drawer where you kept some personal items, incase of slower work days, and shoved them into your bag. You froze when your fingers hit against something that you knew, instantly, should not be in your bag. Peering into the opening, your eyes locked onto a metallic, black, studded object that you had seen earlier that morning.  

              The gun Agust had placed in your hand.

             How did that get in there? You didn’t remember grabbing it unless it had happened in the chaos of the EMTs and police rushing to assess the situation. Well, if you weren’t already anxious, this just made it worse. Let’s just add this to the ever-growing list of stupid things I’ve done today, you berated yourself. You brought a potentially loaded gun into a hospital. You needed to get back up to the room and get this out of your possession. Maybe when this RM got there, he could take it from you. You pulled the bag shut and slugged it over your shoulder, trying hard not to think about it.

            You moved away from the desk and down the hall towards the elevator. But as you stepped into the silent hall with all the doors closed, one was not closed as it had been when you left; the room where Agust had been. And there was someone looking inside. There was a man, tall and stocky, and dressed in a simple navy uniform. He wasn’t a part of the hospital staff and you didn’t think he was there to clean the room with the lights still off. Trying to stay as unnoticed as you could, you took longer strides towards the end. As you passed behind him, you peered beyond him into the pitch blackness of the room to just make out another figure lurking there. He wasn’t dressed in the same way as the man in the door. He was in darker colors that you couldn’t make out and wore what looked like a fedora on his head. What caught your attention as you passed, was the small peek of icy, blue hairs that were just visible on the side. A deep grumble that sounded from the room made your breath catch in your throat, and made you stop in your tracks. It sounded so familiar to the sadistic voice from this morning. The man with the cane had gotten into the hospital?! How, they upped security measures, hadn’t they? Maybe it was your imagination playing with you with all the stress. Not wanting to stick around to figure out if you were right, you tried to get away before they had noticed you.

            But, sadly, you weren’t that lucky.

           “Excuse me, nurse. Perhaps you can help me.”

           You felt your whole body stiffen as the voice was all to clearly the one that had stalked you from beyond the counter. The voice that dripped with crazed malice and venom as he called out for Agust, that had taunted and tried to lure him out. The voice that you were sure would haunt your dreams. It was the man with the cane, though he didn’t have it now. As you turned, he looked nothing like the half-crazed man yelling and destroying things around him. He looked almost normal, save for the fake smile he had plastered across his lips. He was no longer dressed in the light blue suit and fur coat you had caught a glimpse behind the counter, but in a simple dark blazer and trousers. The man who lingered in the doorway had come to stand next to him as they walked up to you, dressed in a police uniform. His uniform cap was pulled low to obscure his face, though you could see bruising and swelling through the shadows. Both of them gave a slight bow to you.

           “Allow me to introduce myself. I’m Inspector Taop, this is officer Chen. We are here following up on a patient that was supposed to be brought here. I’ve been looking everywhere, but no one has an answer for me whether he is here or not. And I haven’t seen a single worker on this floor.”

           He had never seen you at the scene so you knew he didn’t recognize you, or could see that you didn’t believe anything that was coming out of his mouth. That would help you, you decided. You took a deep breath and tried to hide the fear and nervousness. Just act normal. Try to stall until someone comes around.

           “Sorry, officer, we’re a bit understaffed as it is. What can I help you with?”

           “I’m looking for a patient that was brought here. Gunshot victim, a young man, brought in this morning?”

           “Can you be a bit more specific? We are a hospital. Do you know how many young men we have come in here with some kind of bullet wound? I had six this month.”

           You saw the smile slip and irritation rise in those cold eyes. He cleared his throat, trying to hold on to his polite composure. “This one would have come in this morning. There was a shooting downtown. He would have had multiple gunshot wounds. One nurse said he was brought in by ambulance this morning, but then another said that they found no record of him. And the last person I talked to sent me here. Please, this is very important.”

           “Can I see your badge, sir?” He looked completely off guard by the question. You, also, seemed confused. It had just jumped out of your mouth before you realized it. But it seemed like the right thing to ask. You continued, “There’s been a threat made to the hospital, you see, and I need to make sure that everything is in order. I would get in trouble if I gave such information about any patient to an imposter.”

           You could see the wheels in his head turning. But you didn’t expect him to nod his head, understandingly, and reach into his pocket to hand you a leather, bifold wallet. Was this psycho really a police officer? How could someone so vile be in law enforcement? You thought back to what little memories of your father that you had lingering in the back of your mind and couldn’t begin to imagine him doing anything like what this man had done, no matter how bad of a criminal they were. Before you could think, your body seemed to act on it’s own again and opened the wallet and your eyes started to dance across the metal shield. You weren’t entirely sure what you were looking for at first. Until your eyes caught it and something clicked in your mind. It was a fake, but an exceptionally good fake. Anyone else would have just taken it at face value but something in your mind flashed and screamed that this was a fake like the smile still on the ‘inspector’s’ face. In the reaches of your memory, you remembered running your fingers over your father’s badge, memorizing every detail. And you still did that when you were stressed out; you still had his badge and it was currently in the front pocket of your bag. And you seemed to recall your father teaching you how to identify a real badge from others.

           A sudden anger took hold of you that seemed to spur on some brave part of you. You closed the wallet and handed it back to him, keeping your face neutral to hide that you were even more sure of his act. Maybe it was the dishonor to officers like your father, or that he was trying to get to the boy you had risked a lot to save. And your hard work was not going to waste. “I’m sorry officer. But like I said, we have a few patients that could fit your description. None on this floor at all. And if the other nurses said they have no record of him, I’m not sure what I can do for you. Besides that, if we did have a patient come in with multiple gunshot wounds, I imagine that they’d need extensive surgery and wouldn’t be conscious to answer any questions you could have. And with no guardian to act in their place until they are awake to consent to a line of questioning about a traumatic experience, I can’t let you go any further. You should know that, Officer.”

           The smile was wiped from the man’s face. The uniformed man’s eyes got wide at your declaration and they shifted towards his leader in panic. Taop, or whatever his real name was, straightened up and took a step towards you. He towered over you and the energy radiating from him would have intimidated you into submission. Just like with your ex. But you needed to protect Agust. In any case, all you needed to do was scream and someone would be alerted. There wasn’t much this asshole could accomplish without being found out. But he continued to advance until he backed you up against the wall. Even still, you never broke eye contact with him.

           “I don’t think you understand the situation of this, little girl,” he said, rage tittering on the edge of his voice. “There are some really dangerous people and it would be a shame if you got caught in the crossfires. It’s in your best interest to answer my questions and tell me what I need to know.”

           “Then bring a warrant,” you challenged.

           His hand collided with the wall next to your head, making you jump. His face was so close to yours now, and there was the crazed man you remembered from this morning. Your heart was in your ears. He, suddenly, took a deep inhale then another before tilting his head to the side. “What a brave little girl. Tell me, where were you this morning? Something tells me you may be exactly who I need to talk to.”

           “Hey, back off her!”

           Both you and the man turned to look down the hall towards the elevator towards the source of the deep voice that had interrupted the line of questioning. The doors of the elevator were opened and from them stepped a young man with platinum white hair. His eyes were haunting and strong, like a dragon woken from his peace. He was exceptionally tall, taking long strides towards the scene. You couldn’t help but let your eyes take in the man who was coming to your rescue. Dressed in a dark trouser and a white buttoned up shirt gave him a classic handsomeness, and a long black coat with a hood drawn up that accentuated his height. As he approached, he slid the hood down and swiped his hand up to push the stray white hairs from his face. If you weren’t terrified, you would have appreciated how handsome he was. You glanced back at the man caging you; his body tensed as the newcomer walked up but his face never showed.

           He let out a sigh and a small smile reappeared, but it was not the same he had tried to charm you with. It was one of arrogance.  “Ah, Mr. Kim,” the inspector said, not moving from his position, “how nice of you to drop in.”

          “You’ve got some nerve,” the handsome newcomer said, his tone low and smooth. 

          “What for? Being too formal? Do you not like me using your surname? I’m not sure which name you prefer now; you change names so often, it’s hard to keep up after all this time.”

          “You’re one to talk. What name are you going by now, officer? Here to investigate a fraud? Or are you here to put yourself into more trouble?”

          “Such a negative attitude. Officer Chen and I are here on official business,” the detective flashed his badge at the so named Mr. Kim. “And this nice young lady was willing to help me out with some information. Isn’t that right, Little Girl?”

          “It sure doesn’t look that way coming from the elevator. I think you need to take a step back,” Mr. Kim ordered with a strong but suggestive tone that made you question what kind of power someone as young looking as him could possess.

          The fake detective made no sign that he was planning on heeding the newcomer’s words to move from your personal space. His eyes shifted from Mr. Kim back to you. His stare bore into you sharper than claws and made your breath catch. You weren’t sure if he was trying to scare you into agreeing with him or just threaten you. But Mr. Kim was having none of that; he gave the older man’s shoulder a hard shove and wedged himself in the space between you to keep you away from the other man. Mr. Kim reached a hand behind him and placed it on your arm, to keep you secure behind him and to give you some reassurance that he was not going to hurt you. You couldn’t help yourself, as you fisted your hands into the back of his coat and peered around his massive frame.

          “You always have to play savior, don’t you Rapmon?” The way he had said the name made it seem like he was trying to strike a nerve in Mr. Kim. But the other man gave no sign that he was bothered. “You make it seem like I was doing something unseemly to her. You and your broken boy scouts always turn things difficult. Speaking of, where are the others? Maybe they could answer some questions for me. There’s one in particular I’m interested in seeing. I’m checking up on a victim from a shooting downtown. Just making sure he’s doing alright.”

          “You’re really committed to this bit, aren’t you Choi? Oh, sorry- what name are you going by today? It’s so hard to keep track, isn’t that what you said?” Mr. Kim tilted his head to the side, eyes twinkling with a mischievous shine.

          “What a nuisance you are. I’m just trying to get information to make sure things go well. Though come to think of it, your boys may not know much. Word was that the victim was all alone. Left all by themselves, bleeding and hurt in such a dangerous situation. What kind of friends would let someone knowingly go into that situation alone? Now, I’d really like to finish my conversation with the little lady, Rapmon.” When Choi, as you figured his name actually was, took a step towards you, Mr. Kim moved the both of you to keep you behind him and further away from the other. “Well, since you seem hellbent on keeping me from doing something so simple, I could always ask you. Though to be honest, your being here may have answered my questions.”

          “My being here answers nothing,” Mr. Kim challenged. “Unlike you, I am here to do good for the community. And it’s a good thing I came by when I did. You’re already on thin ice after all the trouble you’ve caused. Imagine what would happen if you caused any problems while on Hallowed Ground. If you were to hurt anyone staying or working here, you would have more than my family looking for you. The rest of the Families would be looking to teach you a lesson. Imagine what most of them will think when they hear about the deceit you pulled this morning. After what I witnessed, you can be sure I’ll have eyes monitoring this place. You will not go against the Accords.”

          “Don’t you lecture me about the Accords, you psycho. I’ve been around just as long as they have and lived them. I taught them to you.”

      ��   “And yet, you only follow them when they suit you. Just like your leader and his before him. But things are different now. They are gone, and your hold is slipping. I have enough pull now to ensure Accords are followed. And if you want to make a further spectacle of yourself, I’ll gladly show you I’m not that kid anymore that you ordered around. You saw what my boys can do when pushed. Try me.”

          Choi started to laugh, eyes shining in disbelief at the younger bossing him around. As you peered around Mr. Kim’s frame, you saw him go to say something to officer Chen, but couldn’t form the word. He raised his hand towards the white-haired man, but let it drop with a growl. Whatever look was set upon the elder made him rethink his next move. He settled for raising his hands in a surrender and jerking his head towards his companion to tell him they were leaving. It surprised you that he was giving up so easily after how he had acted towards you. You weren’t sure what Mr. Kim meant by accords and families, but it was more than obvious that it meant something to them. Glancing up at your protector, his face remained locked in the same stern and serious mask he had when he had appeared. His eyes, perfectly lined and accentuated with makeup that only made him more intriguing, followed the pair as they turned down the hall.

          But before they could get too far, Choi stopped. He turned enough to gaze at the two of you over his shoulder, the dark and manic gleam from that morning flashing like a warning sign. He chuckled before his teasing and taunting voice that had called out to Agust filled the hall like glass shattering. “Look at how far our little maniac has come. Really living up to the title of Mad Leader, aren’t you? He thinks he’s so big and strong that he can just order me around and act like a knight in shining armor to the weak. The Mad Leader’s trying so hard to put up a front, to hide who he is, to hide the other side of the looking glass. But lest he forget, I know things he wouldn’t want others to know. And I seem to recall,” Choi turned fully around and took a full stride back towards Mr. Kim, “you had an issue with places like this. You don’t enjoy being here. Are you falling down the rabbit hole? You even have an Alice this time it would seem. So tell me, Mad Leader, are the walls closing in on you yet? Are you feeling anxious?”

          You could feel Mr. Kim tense up at the name ‘Mad Leader’ each time Choi said it. He took a deep breath, trying to ground himself. He gave you a polite push away from him before fixing Choi with a glare that made officer Chen startle. You could almost feel the air change as he stepped up to be nose to nose with the thug.

          “Since you can’t seem to remember my name, asshole, let me spell it out for you. It’s RM, R to the M. And I’m a motherfucking monster. Keep pushing me. I dare you. You hurt one of my boys. You better pray that he makes it out of all this ok. Or you’ll see just how ‘mad’ I can get.”

          Chen seemed to realize that something bad was building as he took hold of his superior and pulled him away from RM, newly identified. Choi kept the taunting smile spread across his lips as he allowed Chen to lead him away. Before he got too far, he looked over at you and gave a nod, “We’ll be in touch, Little Girl.” And then he disappeared from the floor, leaving you in the presence of RM. You can’t say you had expected this person to belong to the voice on the other end of the phone, but it would seem like that was the theme of the day. The tall man took a few deep breaths and ran his hand through his white hair before turning back to you. The serious mask he had worn had slipped away and was more approachable. He straightened his clothes before returning to your side.

          “I’m sorry you had to see that,” he said, “But he shouldn’t be back. He talks a good game but he knows when he’s out done. Did he hurt you?”

          You shook your head. “I can’t believe he got in. The hospital is on lock down.”

          “Well, he’s been around a while. He has his ways. Now that he’s gone, I was hoping you could help me. I’m looking for a nurse called Y/N.” You locked eyes with him and gave him a nod of affirmation. He gave you a smile, showing off a pair of dimples in his cheeks that made him much more innocent and sweeter than the man who had gone nose to nose with the monstrous thug. “That’s a coincidence. Nice to meet you. Can you show me where to go?”

          “Prove that you’re who you say you are,” you said, taking a step away from him. Despite that you were sure he was the one you had talked to, it seemed like nothing was safe. He looked at you for a moment, before coming to a conclusion. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a cell phone before letting his finger glide across the screen. A moment later, Agust phone sounded off in your pocket. He glanced over at you with a bemused look as you pulled the phone out and saw the screen lit up with a notification.

-          God of Destruction: It’s me.

          “Sorry,” you said, feeling embarrassed by your sudden suspicion, “but after that guy flashed a fake police badge at me, I just wanted to be sure. Thank you for coming and for helping me. Are you Agust’s brother or a friend?”

          RM’s eyes narrowed when he heard you say Agust and gave you a strange look. His eyes seemed to dance about you, as if he was trying to figure something out. But as quickly as it appeared, the look disappeared and he smiled again. “We usually call him Suga. Only people who don’t like him call him Agust. I don’t think he’d want you calling him that. Can we go see him now? We’ve been worried about him.” You nodded and motioned him to follow you back to the elevator. As you waited for the doors to reopen, he leaned over and whispered, “Don’t worry, I won’t tell Hyung you had his phone.”

          “What? Does he have some embarrassing things on here,” you joked.

          “Maybe,” came the reply and heard RM chuckle as he allowed you to step into the elevator.

          You hit the button for the floor that they moved Agu- Suga to, the doors slid shut, and the lift jolted to a start. As the sound of the mechanisms filled the space, you caught a glimpse of the tall man flinch. It seemed odd, seeing as he had just faced off against the most frightening person you had ever seen. The taunting words he had said to RM before leaving came to mind, about not liking it in a hospital. It wasn’t uncommon for people to have bad experiences related to hospitals, so you tried to brush it off. Once you had made it to the secure floor, you led him down the hall. You explained that the floor was only accessible to a few people and how they had followed the directions as specified to the director. The entire time, RM listened very intently, eyes never leaving you. He was the picture of professionalism and sincerity. You swiped the two of you into the ward, and he held the door open for you as you led him down the hall to the room. As you neared the room, you wondered if you were going to survive the present of two very handsome men. Hopefully, the rest of his friends that you heard over the phone were somewhat average.

          As you both entered the room, RM came to a stop in the threshold of the door, his eyes staring at the bed. You could see the worry and panic that you had heard over the phone slip across his face. You reached out and touched his arm. He looked at you with an almost innocent gaze, like he was questioning if it was alright to get closer. You gave him a nod and he was beside his friend in a flash. He looked as if he was debating to reach out to Suga, as if he were made of glass, but settled for taking hold of his hand. RM let out a breath and looked relieved to have finally seen his friend. From your place at the edge of the room, you could see how much one meant to the other and all worries about them being as bad as Choi disappeared.

          “Is he going to be ok? What did they do to him,” RM asked, never taking his eyes off his companion.

          “Dr. Na took good care of him,” you said, reaching for the file at the end of the bed. “He was shot twice, once in the shoulder and on his left side. The gunshot wound on his side appeared to be at close range and the bullet went through. Thankfully, there wasn’t much damage done. The bullet was lodged in his shoulder, but Dr. Na was able to remove it and mend up some of the damage. We’ll know more when he wakes up, but he should have full range of motion after some rest. He, also, has some bruised ribs and a slight concussion. Along with bruising and defensive wounds pretty much everywhere. He, also, lost a lot of blood. He’s in the middle of a transfusion now. But he is responding well to everything and we believe he should be waking up soon. With enough care, patience, and support, he should make a full recovery in no time. Which is amazing; when I found him, I was worried with how much blood he had lost that he may have had a harder road to recovery.”

          RM flicked his eyes over to you. “You found him?”

          “They must not have told you. I was on my way to work when I heard the gunshots. I was the first to find him and get him to safety.”

          RM looked like he wanted to ask more questions, when a soft groan came from the bed and drew the attention. Suga took in a deep breath and his body shifted as if fighting to wake and identify the voices. After a tense moment, his body relaxed and his eyes opened slightly. From the edge of the bed, you could see the glazed and shiny effects of the medication still trying to hold him in the state of unconsciousness, and realized he may not fully be aware of what is happening. But you were sure the presence of RM had drawn him out enough to give them a sign that he was okay. RM called out to his hyung softly, drawing Suga’s attention as he gazed about the room.

          “Hyung, hey, can you hear me?”

          Suga’s eyes fully landed on RM. It seemed as if he was fighting his way to recognition before he gave a small, drugged smile back. “Joon,” his voice sounded exhausted and stained.

          RM laughed. “Yeah, Hyung, it’s me. You’re gonna be okay. You’re safe.”

          “Joonie, I think I’m dead. I saw an angel.”

          The whitehaired man reached out and ran his fingers, gently, through his friend’s hair. “No, Hyung, you’re only tired. That bastard messed you up but you’re gonna be alright now. Why don’t you go back to sleep? The boys and I will be here when you wake up.”

          “Oh,” Suga said, almost sounding disappointed as the drugs started to drag him back to oblivion, “too bad. It was a pretty angel. Prettier than Jiminie and Hyungie combined. But don’t tell them I said that.” And just as fast as he woke, Suga went silent and still again.

[chaseatinydream]

pirate king (4) || atz

You’re sitting at a tiny cove.

Your legs swing along the rocky ledge of the cliff you are on, dangling into the water. Beneath you, the water sparkles like liquid emeralds. Bright, colorful fish dart here and there around your feet and you laugh.

You leap down and there’s a splash, you’re waist deep in water. You move forward and forward until you’ve reached the mouth of the cove and the water comes up to your chin.

You close your eyes, take a deep breath, and submerge yourself.

Something soft and gentle brushes its way along your arms and you giggle underwater, bubbles escaping your mouth, but it’s of no concern to you. The soft arms caress you gently, as if you’re a precious treasure to them. You open your eyes.

Something stares back at you, glowing the colour of blood. It’s massive, almost twice your size, radiating some sort of curious light in the middle of the dark mass it’s in. Then it hits you.

It’s a single, unblinking eye.

You jerk awake with cold sweat running down your back and immediately regret it as you feel your head split in half from a sharp throbbing in your head. You groan, keeping your eyes tightly shut as you cradle your head in your hands, waiting for the pain to subside.

Something tugs lightly at your shoulder. No, not rope. Cloth? You start to panic when you realize that you are no longer tied to the mast.

Are they intending to kill you now?

“Ah, you’re awake.”

Your eyes fly open and you immediately shy away from the voice, pressing against the wall next to you. Your legs instinctively curl up to your body and you let out a cry of pain as your ankle knocks into wood.

“Don’t move, idiot.”

You look up to see the man talking to you. He’s tall and lightly built, dressed in a simple, oversized tunic and knee length shorts. Around his neck are a few silver chains, with strange symbols you don’t recognise, and his hair is a soft grey-green. Everything about him throws you off, he feels soft and reserved, nothing like a pirate.

Then you see the short dagger strapped to his left thigh.

You press against the wall more tightly, turning your face away from him. If he’s going to kill you, it might be more bearable if you can’t see it coming. You feel the tiny rocking of ocean waves.

“My name is Choi San, but you can just call me San.” The man begins to introduce himself, seating himself in a chair opposite you. You’re in a bed, you realize, as he continues to speak. “I’m the healer on board the Treasure, so I was responsible for treating your wounds. It’s admirable how you managed to keep quiet about a badly twisted ankle, an infected musket wound and a raging fever all at once.” There's something unsaid left in his voice.

You swallow.

“Especially for a woman.”

You freeze, all movement ceasing in a single second. Your hands unconsciously move up to your chest, only to find it unbound underneath a couple of layers of fabric.

Oh shit.

You’re definitely going to be shark food now.

“I haven’t told Hongjoong yet, if that’s what you were wondering.”

Your head whips around to stare at him in shock. His expression hasn’t changed the least, he still wears the same unreadable, blank face and you can’t tell whether he’s joking or he’s being serious. He has no reason not to report to the captain his findings, so why?

“It’s not my business that Hongjoong-ie is so blind he can’t tell the difference.” The healer leans back in a sturdy wooden chair, steepling his fingers with a calm gaze. You can’t tell whether that is comforting or terrifying. “Besides, I have a cat’s nature and I find my curiosity difficult to satisfy. So, if your story entertains me enough, I may keep your little secret from the captain. But I can see that you’re bursting to ask questions, so ask away.”

“Who undressed me?” Are the first words that tumble from your mouth. San chuckles at your question.

“Me.”

You groan in embarrassment and hide your face in your hands, unable to face him anymore. He snickers in amusement, and even though you can’t see it, his smile dimples his cheeks.

“No need to feel shy.” The man remarks, even though you can hear the mirth lingering in his voice. “I didn’t look. I just changed your bandages daily for the last two days.”

“I’ve been asleep for two days? That doesn’t make it any better.” Your words are muffled behind your fingers and you know your cheeks are tinged pink. “It’s still embarrassing.”

“I had to check you over for injuries.” San explains logically as you peer at him between the cracks in your fingers. “Who knows what else you might be hiding? I cleaned your wounds with salt water solution and bandaged you. As for your ankle, I splinted it with driftwood but don’t expect to walk normally for the next five to ten days or so.”

You gulp. Five days is more than you can afford.

“Is the captain going to throw me overboard?”

“As if I’d let him.” San’s complete indifference to Hongjoong’s authority surprises you, but you suppose even the captain needs to be on a healer’s good side in case he ever gets injured. This explains the sizable room and bed for the healer. Still, the informal way he addresses his captain is a little shocking. “He’s not going to waste all that effort I put into treating you. I used the last of my marigold petal antiseptic on your arm and he’d better get me more at Tortuga.”

You manage to stifle the tiny giggle that leaves your mouth, but San hears it anyways. He smiles slightly. “So, what’s your name?”

You pause, then answer as truthfully as possible.

“I don’t remember.”

To your surprise, San doesn’t try to call you a liar or force you to tell him some other answer. Instead he ponders your words carefully.

“That’s a common symptom among those who have head injuries. I was just telling Yeosang about them a few days ago.” You don’t know who Yeosang is, but you nod in understanding. You’re a little relieved that he seems to believe you, but is this a ploy to make you lower your guard? “They’re short term, but the memories usually come back after a few days or weeks. I don’t think I’ve met many who’ve forgotten their own identities though. Those usually die a few days after.”

“What?” You choke and suddenly you start coughing, your throat dry and scratchy. San reaches for a mug you hadn’t noticed before on his desk and passes it to you, filled with a fragrant green tinted liquid you don’t recognize. You can’t hide your suspicious look.

“It’s jasmine green tea.” San explains as he sits down again. “It’s helps calm the nerves and is also a fantastic cleaning solution for wounds as it prevents infection, but I prefer drinking it. My shipmates would rather ingest grog.” He sniffs in distaste and shakes his head. “Hongjoong knows what’s good for him, though. We’ve stayed in the cove for a couple days more because some of the scouting parties found tea leaves growing on one of the hills nearby. The rest are hunting deer with Shiber so we can have fresh venison tonight. It makes a nice change from eating preserved food all the time.”

As he continues to ramble about how some of the crew have started setting out nets to catch some fresh fish, you take a sip of the tea. It’s a little bitter with a warm, grassy flavor. You don’t enjoy it very much, but the next available option, grog, sounds even more unpalatable, so you choose to down the whole mug.

San pauses in his talking to nod his approval. “You’re a smart one. Anyway, as I was saying, the men usually die soon, but that’s because of internal bleeding in the skull. I found blood clots when I cut their heads open.”

You almost spit out the tea. “You cut their what open?”

The healer shrugs. “They’re already dead, so they don’t feel a thing.” When you continue to give him dubious, horrified looks, he starts to explain. “It’s for medical research! What I’m trying to say is, they don’t die because they lose their memories, they die because of the wound that caused them to lose their memories. From what I can see, you don’t have any such wound.”

“That’s reassuring.” You manage to say, thumping your chest. San nods.

“Captain said you claimed to have woken up in a prison cell in Raguza, am I correct?” He asks and you nod. San seems like a kind person and is the only one who is willing to help you. Then you pause.

“Raguza?” You repeat, unfamiliar with the name. San dismisses it with a wave.

“The town we raided a few days ago.” He explains, before carrying on. “He also said that you claimed to have no memory of how you came to be wearing the coat of a Royal Navy officer.”

You nod hesitantly. Even you’re aware of how unbelievable your story sounds. But San seems to be taking all of this in stride, better than you are, at least.

“Well, you could either be a skilled liar, insane, or telling the truth.”

You open your mouth to protest that nothing that has come out of your mouth has been a lie so far, but he holds up a hand to stop you. Your mouth closes with an audible clop.

“If you are a liar and are simply a spy of the Royal Navy here to steal the navigational maps, you must be a terrible one to present such a ridiculous story.” You try to protest again, but he continues. “From what I gather of my conversation with you, you are too sound of mind to be mad. So that only leaves me with one option. You are telling the truth.”

Just like that?

Something in you breaks down in relief and your shoulders sag. You’ve known that the whole time, that you’ve been telling the truth, that you have no memories. But suddenly, you’re not alone. Now, somebody believes you.

Someone understands.

You don’t even realize you’re crying until San reaches forward to brush the tears from your eyes. His fingers are gentle and warm, like Seonghwa’s hands. Then you start.

“Did Seonghwa bring me here? Where are we?” You look around the room you are in. You’re sitting on one of the two small beds in the cramped cabin, the shelves along the walls overflowing with written text, books and boxes with messily scribbled labels. There’s a small wooden table in the middle, a stack of paper in danger of falling off the side, and several stalks of dried plants on its surface. Opposite you is a wooden door.

“We’re in my cabin. You’re currently in Seonghwa’s bed. He offered to bed down with the rest of the crew until you recover.” San hesitates. “As for who brought you here… he asked not to be mentioned. It wasn’t Seonghwa.”

A frown tugs at your lips. Besides the kindly cook, who else would take any sympathy on you to come drag you here in the middle of a rainstorm? San shakes his head and gets to his feet.

“Don’t think too much about it.” Before you can protest, he moves over to the table and retrieves a small wooden box, opening its clasp. “Anyway, I was intending on returning this to you once you woke up.”

A thin, silver chain dangles from his fingers, at the end of which is a tiny, clear cut crystal. Small, delicately wrought silver leaves hold the crystal in place, and your mouth falls open in awe as San presses it into your hand. A kaleidoscope of reflected colors fall on your palm.

“It’s beautiful.” You breathe, lifting your hand to inspect the gem. San’s head cocks to the side in confusion.

“That is not the response I was hoping for, considering that I took it from your neck when I was undressing you.” He frowns, and your eyes widen in surprise.

“From me? As in, it was around my neck the whole time and I didn’t notice it?” You babble and San nods. He taps the largest silver leaf with a finger.

“Look at this carefully.”

There’s an inscription in the lid, beneath a carving of an elaborate swirl. You squint to make out the minuscule words.

I will be with you every step of the way.

You pause in shock at the revelation.

From before you lost your memories, from before you came to be in that tiny prison cell, you were not alone. If you just find the person who gave you this, you’ll know who you were before.

“You should keep it with you.” Gently, San takes the necklace from your hands and clasps it behind your neck. You’re silent in wonder, fingering the tiny crystal that nestles in the center of your chest. “Now, I should really go check on Wooyoung’s arm before he starts whining again.” He rises to his feet. “Do you have any last questions?”

“Is the captain really not going to throw me overboard?” You manage, gripping the tiny crystal in hand. At this, San really laughs.

“No. Although he did burn the Royal Navy coat you were wearing and tossed the ashes into the sea.” The healer replies as he plucks a small jar of ointment from a shelf. “If you give him no reason to kill you, he won’t.”

“Being alive seems to be reason enough to him.” You mutter unhappily under your breath, tucking yourself under the covers once more. Your eyelids are getting heavy once again. “The captain really hates the Royal Navy, doesn’t he? Why?”

Out of the corner of your eye, you see San shrug as he pulls a leather sling bag over his shoulder. “He has good reason to, but it’s not my story to tell.”

Then he crosses over to you and tucks the blankets a little more securely around you. His grey eyes are soft.

“Go to sleep. I’ll come back and tend to you later.” San’s voice is gentle and melodic, like a lullaby.

You close your eyes, still clasping the small crystal in your hand. “Okay.” You murmur in reply, pulling the blanket closer around you. “Just for a while more, then.”

You don’t wake up till a day later.