#and he has lived a lot of his life fueled by hatred

[yujikuna]

I wonder if you’d rather fix Toji or make him worse?

i have no interest in having a toxic relationship with toji im fixing that man. toji is like a stray cat in the sense that at first he comes and goes as he pleases and is slightly a nuisance and wants to take advantage of any kindness shown to him yet lashes out and runs away if you pet him the wrong way. eventually comes slinking back ready to cause problems again and is so surprised when the door is open and dinner is almost ready that he just ends up staying.

[wangxianficfinder]

In the mood for...

July 10th

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1. thanks in advance :) i hope you don't mind a nsfw itmf req. can you/the community recommend any good fics with bimboification vibes? specifically with wwx as the one undergoing it. i've read several fics like this, but i'm hoping there are more i haven't found

Baby, You Ain’t Seen Nothing Yet by TriviasFolly (E, 177k, WangXian, Modern AU, A/B/O Dynamics, Alpha LWJ, Omega WWX, Omega LSZ, Mafia, Crime, Sects are Clans, Feral WWX, Feral Omegas, Nurse WWX, Dark LWJ, Dark WWX, Possessive LWJ, feminine WWX, wwx’s cannon desire to be a sugar baby/trophy wife, Breeding Kink, Mpreg) A/B/O dynamics, long fic, modern AU mafia setting, really great

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2. Hi for the next itmf I was wondering if anyone had some time travel gone wrong? Like, maybe wwx tries to go to the past but instead he only sends resentment and it ends up haunting the wwx of the past or sometimes. Thanks!

Grief and Blame, Interwoven by donutsweeper (T, 2k, LXC & LWJ, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Character Death, Dark, discipline whip, Time Travel) LXC uses time travel and changes something to fix things but it doesn't work remotely as he'd thought it would

🔒❤️ the thing with feathers by RoseThorne  (G, 43k,wangxian, Transmigration, Time Travel Fix-It, Illnesses, Family, Scars, Memory Loss, Angst, Fear, Recovery, Sharing a Bed, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Good Parent YZY, Referenced Sexual Slavery, Blood and Gore, Sexual Tension, Arranged Marriage, Grief, Adoption, POV Third Person, POV Alternating, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Good Parent LQR, Clairvoyance, Butterfly Effect) link in #12

❤️ A Future Family In A Broken Past by Hauntcats (T, 121k, wangxian, time travel, not Jiang friendly, Not Cultivation World Friendly, WWX Needs a Hug, Family Dynamics, What is a good family?, Fear of emotions does not excuse abuse, happy ending of sorts, Not Jiang Clan Friendly, Angst with a Happy Ending, fix-it, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon Divergence, LXC needs a hug, Everyone Needs A Hug, except JC, He can suffer, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, not YZY friendly) has time travel that was fueled by resentful energy so more monsters are encountered in the new timeline.

Lan Yuan's War by BurningTea (G, 196k, LSZ & LWJ, LWJ & LXC, WangXian, LWJ & WQ, WIP, Time Travel, Dad LWJ, Sunshot Campaign, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Happy Ending, Rumours, Lots of rumours about LWJ, several people worry about LWJ, CQL Verse, Mental Health Issues, LWJ is very much not okay, Time travel has consequences, Sick LWJ) has time travel that affects the golden cores and health of those who traveled through time.

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3. Hi, for the next itmf, can you suggest some fics where A-yuan and Lan Jingyi are twins

🔒❤️ kick at the darkness ‘til it bleeds daylight by AlfAlfAlfAlfAlf, tardigradeschool (T, 75k, WangXian, Hurt/Comfort, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Eventual Happy Ending, Getting Together, Burial Mounds Settlement Days, Inspired by The Parent Trap (1998), Kid Fic, teen shenanigans, two a-yuans, Fluff and Angst)

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4. thank you for your work !! itmf any fic where either yl!wwx gets transported to the future, or he comes back to life after his death, and his name has been cleared/he’s been missed/basically he isn’t met with hatred and killing intent. thanks again!

🧡 The Shade of Old Trees by Kryal (T, 363k, WangXian, Ridiculously Long Notes, History, Canon Divergence, Modern AU, Slow Burn, Worldbuilding, Slow Life, Action/Adventure, Magic Returns, BAMF WWX)

Until The End by abCEE (M, 365k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, war changes people, resulting to OOC, no pinning, Established Relationship, Mpreg, Good Uncle LQR, a little grey LWJ, a bit of JC bashing from LWJ, BAMF JYL, 16 years of yearning, mainly CQL verse but has scenes from the novel as well, LSZ is WangXian’s Child, WWX Has a New Golden Core, Canon Rewrite, Happy Ending, Fix-It of Sorts) might work. It isn’t time travel, rather a canon rewrite, but circumstances happen and in the years WWX is absent his name is cleared.

🔒 不忘 | Don't Forget by dragongirlG (E, 50k, WangXian, LSZ & LWJ, JL & LSZ & LJY & OYZZ, Canon Divergence, Time Travel, Reincarnation, Fix-It of Sorts, Identity Porn, Social Media, Devotion, Reunions, Feelings, Family, Angst with a Happy Ending, Light Bondage, Names, References to Canon, Modern Era, Artist WWX, Sexual Content, Pining, POV Multiple, Additional Warnings In Author's Note)

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5. Hi! This is for ITMF where WWX works as medical examiner or a coroner or he works in lab like in "i really want to know (who are you)" by Stratisphyre

Thank you! @idontknowwhattowriteforusername

Slaughter House by Duochanfan (M, 24k, future WangXian, LXC/NMJ, NHS/JC, Light Angst, Drama, Crime Scenes, Crime Drama, Psychometric WWX, Coroner WWX, detective LWJ, Detective JC, slight romance, Amnesia, Past Kidnapping, Murder Mystery, Reference to Autopsies, dead bodies, Single Parent WWX, Modern)

Post Mortem by Cataclysmic_Calamity (E, 178k, WangXian, Psychological Horror, Modern, friends with benefits, they’re both fucked up but they love each other so much, Slow Burn Mystery, Unnegotiated Kink, Dom/sub, Anal Sex, Consensual Non-Consent, Stalking, Drug Addiction, Serial Killers, in WWX’s desire to critique the ‘final girl’ trope he accidentally becomes one, Angst with a Happy Ending, meta commentary on the horror and true crime genres) medical examiner WWX, thriller/horror, stalking but not between Wangxian, extremely good writing, very worth the read

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6. sorry if this has been asked before but for im ITMF a fic where lan wangji is very overprotective of wei wuxian. preferably because wwx's death traumatized him, but id also take any other overprotective fics. thank you!!!! @stgroversfire

So Full Of Love (Wouldn’t Know Where to Start) by witchupbitch (M, 63k, WIP, WangXian, Best Friends, Friends to Lovers, Fluff, Eventual Romance, Eventual Sex, Possessive LWJ, Protective LWJ, Blood and Violence, Idiots in Love, Humor, Mafia AU, Modern AU, Flirting, shameless WWX, Confident WWX, Explicit Language, Mutual Sexual Tension, dark LWJ, Dark WWX, Exhibitionism Sex, Possessive Behavior, Unhealthy Relationships, Twisted and Fluffy Feelings) modern AU mafia, dark Wangxian, like they're both really fucked up

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7. hello hardworking mods! i can see that you're working on a backlog, so no rush, and thanks for your hard work!! i would love to see a fic where any member of the cast is trans, and learning how to deal with second puberty - preferably ftm, and not treated like a crack fic. bonus points if its wwx and he gets totally railed, bonus bonus points if there are lovely family dynamics centred around someone being lovingly accepted.

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8. Hello good! This fandom is so big that I was wondering if fanfics were written with Lan Wangji condemned to live the same fate as his mother. Mama Lan was always a compelling mystery to me, canon LWJ was more in line with making her father's mistake, but then I thought about Mama Lan and went wild thinking "What if?" It would be a delicious avalanche of mixed feelings and strange curveballs for Wangxian to end up like this, considering their dynamic and how they are as people. I don't know what tag to use to find something like this (if it exists), so I would really appreciate your help! Thanks for your time in advance @makolashida

I haven't read any fanfics of that type but maybe dark!Wei Wuxian + bottom Lan Wangji could give some results? Maybe just bottom Lan Wangji + gusu lan sect bashing

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9. I m new to this... I don't really know how this works but... Are there any fics where Wei Ying goes to therapy and just processes his trauma? @ishipwenqingwithmyself

Better By Change by NebulusCharlie (Not Rated, 8k, WangXian, Therapy, Not JC Friendly, gaslighting JYL, Happy Wangxian, Fluffy wangxian, Boundaries, healthy mindspace) it's a modern AU, involves JC + JYL bashing, doesn't deal with canon WWX trauma like losing his core/various family deaths/war trauma

redemption lies plainly in truth by kaseyskat (T, 5k, WangXian, JC & WWX, JL & WWX, WQ & WWX, WWX & JYL, Post-Canon, Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Grief/Mourning, Character Study, WWX is allowed to mourn, that's it that's the fic, Reconciliation, mentions of WWXs past) set in canon so no therapy in the modern sense but WWX gets time to process some of his grief

Come Around and Stay by trippednfell (M, 160k, WangXian, NieLan, Slow Burn, Kid Fic, Found Family, Modern AU, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, PTSD, Blood and Injury, Dissociation, Angst with a Happy Ending, Musicals, POV Alternating, Baking, Yunmeng reconciliation (eventually), Friend Zoning, Literal Sleeping Together, Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks) modern AU, WWX gets a therapist in this one, no canon trauma processing but deals with modern trauma

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10. Are there any fics, where wangxian end up talking about LXC calling WWX LWJ's one mistake? Or where LWJ finds out his brother said that. Thank you for all your amazing work. I adore this blog. @winxhelina

🔒💖 When has silence saved anyone?by Vrishchika (T, 6k, wangxian, LSZ & WWX & LWJ, post-canon, LXC  critical, family feels, angry LWJ & LSZ, LXC gets scolded) really wonderful writing, takes a critical look at LXC

Wei Ying Was Not A “MISTAKE” by Jeeny271196 (Not rated, 6k, wangxian, LXC & LWJ, BAMF LWJ, confrontation, hurt/comfort, protective LWJ, not LXC friendly) LWJ snaps back at LXC

Enough! by Jeeny271196 (Not Rated, 12k, WangXian, WIP, Gusu Lan Sect Bashing, Jiang Family Bashing, JC Bashing, LXC Bashing, BAMF WWX, Cultivation Sect Politics) WWX is the one who snaps back at LXC

break by justdoityoufucker (T, 3k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, LXC Critical, JC Critical, Canonical Character Death, Guānyīn Temple Scene, BAMF WN, Protective WN) Wen Ning is the one who snaps back at LXC

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11. ITMF fics (non modern au) that explore WWX’s time on the street and the consequences of it please and thank you @dynmo13

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12. for itmf any fics about wei wuxians childhood in yunmeng jiang sect mostly canon but they save yunmeng jiang sect/not everyone dies and madame yu is not written as an antagonist or she has redemption arc something like that

tysm @r3n-vy

🔒❤️ the thing with feathers by RoseThorne  (G, 43k,wangxian, Transmigration, Time Travel Fix-It, Illnesses, Family, Scars, Memory Loss, Angst, Fear, Recovery, Sharing a Bed, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Good Parent YZY, Referenced Sexual Slavery, Blood and Gore, Sexual Tension, Arranged Marriage, Grief, Adoption, POV Third Person, POV Alternating, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Good Parent LQR, Clairvoyance, Butterfly Effect)

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13. Itmf wwx having a daughter

Jiang Xiaolian's Guide to Motherhood and Gardening by bumbledees (T, 14k, WangXian, JC/WQ, JYL/JZX, Crack Taken Mostly Seriously, like many of WWX's best ideas it starts as a joke!, and then i write it, canon is sad bitch let's get you some fun, purposeful baby aquisition, john mulaney voice: you know those days when you're like 'this might as well happen', that's this fic, WWX when will you learn that there are consequences to your actions, have a melon baby) sort of but not really mpreg? there's no actual pregnancy, just some WWX-typical cultivation shenanigans

sweet lotus petals, unfolding in the sun by stiltonbasket (G, 33k, WangXian, LXC & LWJ, LXC & WWX, JC & WWX, Unplanned Pregnancy, Married WangXian, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Curtain Fic, wangxian are dads and it hurts so good, Medical Inaccuracies, heaps of them, Mpreg, lxc is best bro, someone save JC, wangxian dual cultivation baby, except not how you think, the radish method gets an upgrade, Reincarnation) mpreg WWX

❤️ Attempting the Impossible by Ariaste for williedustice (T, 36k, WangXian, JC & WWX, Post-Canon, Yunmeng Bros Reconciliation, Adoption, Family Fluff, Kid fic, Family drama, Fluff, 🔒[PODFIC] Attempting the Impossible by Ariaste by lunatique)

Never Again by Hauntcats (T, 67k, WWX & WN & WQ, JC & WWX, wangxian, graphic depictions of violence, major character death, Canon Divergence, Angst, Golden Core Transfer Fix-It, Time Travel Fix-It, Not JC Friendly, Dark, BAMF WWX, mentions of abuse, Not Everyone Dies au, XY doesn’t have a happy ending)

🔒 Little Stars by Aki_no_hikari (G, 4k, WangXian, Family Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Canon Divergence, Yílíng Wèi Sect)

The Trouble with Talismans: a Treatise on Time-Travel by Young Master Lan Xiaohui (Age 6) by stiltonbasket (G, 26k, WangXian, LSZ & WWX & LWJ, LXC & LWJ, LXC/NMJ, Time Travel, wangxian get smacked in the face with their future children, Parenthood, Developing Relationship, Getting Together, a-yuan is the best big brother, xiao-yu has a, Very bad day, baby just wants his a-niang, and for his parents to GET IT TOGETHER already, Happy Ending, Confused WWX, Accidental Baby Acquisition, lwj is panicking)

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14. Hi! I'm in the mood for any good recommendations for fanfics that aren't on AO3. Any favorite Tumblr posts, or anything on other sites. Smut or Fluff very welcome! But anything goes. @hikato-chan

Shattered Mirrors Master Post by @besanii

rebuttable presumption masterpost by @sarah-yyy

The requester for 14 should be sure to check out the non-AO3 fic compilations: Non-AO3 Part 1 (Twitter) | Pt.2

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15. Hey! Not sure if my prev. ask got sent so if this is a duplicate please delete. For ITMF - do you know of any fics that challenge the practice of seclusion? It's just the more I think about it the more it seems like the in-universe version of celebrities going to "rehab" at upscale resorts to avoid taking responsibility for their behavior. So I'd like to see a character (possibly lxc?) dragged back out again to clean up their own mess.

Scattered ashes and dispersed smoke series by AshayaTReldai (E, 50k, Past LXC/WWX, WangXian, SL/XXC, Past Mpreg, LXC in Seclusion, Post-LXC in Seclusion, Angst, Family systems theory and differentiation, Broken LXC, but we're going to give him the opportunity to heal, Daoism, PTSD, Abuse, Mental Coercion, Mental Abuse, JGY has a lot to answer for, Dark WWX, Dark LXC, WWX's Birthday, Angry rant, the raw truth) This is a 2 part series, canon divergence AU. Changes are big but don't actually shift the overall plot. (Changes are WWX and LXC have an arranged marriage at first, golden core goes to LXC, WWX and LXC are A-Yuan's birth parents.) That stuff isn't really important and is kind of just mentioned, the focus is on LXC facing his mistakes and actually growing as a person. Wangxian happy ending.

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16. Is there wangxian fics where the gusu classroom sees wangxian's future and shamelessness? what led to deaths framing wwx? Whodunnit and why? @tjrc18

💖 From the Future for the Past by friedchickenlord (G, 27k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Time Travel Fix-It, First Love, Love Confessions, Fluff and Humor, accidental time travel due to one husband malfunctioning array, teen wangxian meet adult wangxian, Happy Ending, adding extra chapter, in this household we hate JGS, in which WWX love library pavilion, (in a way) Yiling Laozu x Hanguang Jun, Denial, Mutual Pining)

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17. fics where wwx has wings. or a fic where wwx only has a (raven?) wing and lwj saw it and fell in love if I'm not mistaken @quwieiidkd

you'll love me at once (the way you did once upon a dream) by sweetlolixo (T, 18k, WangXian, Dark Fairytale, Inspired by Maleficent (2014), Wingfic, Sleeping Beauty with a twist, Maleficent WWX, Prince LWJ, Older WWX, Younger LWJ, young prince lwj flirts with MILF wwx that's it that's the fic, just kidding there is also, Angst with a Happy Ending, True Love's Kiss, Three Chaotic Fairies NHS NMJ and JGY, A Fairytale Iteration of "Lan Zhan you like Mian Mian?!") maleficent AU WWX

the sleeper's gift by iliacquer (T, 6k, WangXian, Implied/Referenced Torture, Disability, A curse within a curse within a curse, Wingfic, Sleeping Beauty Retelling, Maleficent WWX, Reincarnation, Sometimes love lasts multiple lifetimes I guess, True Love's Kiss) another maleficent AU but more intricate, cursed LWJ and WWX

Two is a Pair, Three is a Murder by cosmicworry14 (E, 6k, WangXian, Wingfic, winged!wwx, demonic bird wwx, Bird/Human Hybrids, Protective LWJ, Possessive LWJ, Possessive WWX, Animal Instincts, Courting Rituals, Blood and Gore, Dark) winged WWX due to burial mounds

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If you didn’t get an answer to your ask here, don’t forget to make use of @mdzs-kinkmeme and MDZS KINK MEME on Dreamwidth. Authors actually do use them for ideas. You may get what you order!***Your prompt doesn’t have to be kink! Fluff, crack, whatever - it’s all good!***

[maespri]

oh my i never really saw myself making a post like this, but i really wanna talk about morgana! more specifically… why i don’t really understand the hate he receives.

for starters, i know a lot of people dislike mona because he gets on ryuji’s case often. his squabbling with ryuji can get hurtful at times too, i know, but i feel like so many people conveniently leave out the fact that… ryuji returns fire? it’s not as though mona is constantly attacking poor ryuji who can’t defend himself; it’s a two-sided fight throughout most of the game. both of them are constantly fueling the fire. not to mention, it’s a fight that eventually ends. both individuals have great character development (i could talk about it for /ages/, but i digress) that ends with their fighting essentially ceasing entirely. they’re both dumb teenage boys, they both said dumb stuff to each other, and they both hurt each other, and all of that is recognized and left in the past.

the hatred toward mona in general is something i struggle to understand entirely. you hate this cat because he tells you to go to bed? the game would have told you to do that one way or another, because it’s a game. there have to be constraints, or you’d get terribly overpowered incredibly fast. i wholeheartedly agree that mona’s lacking in comparison to the other characters in many ways- but i’ve never hated him, and was surprised to see a lot of people did.

maybe i’m just weirdly empathetic toward fictional characters, but i really liked his storyline. mona’s been with the protagonist since day one, helping him out, staying with him, encouraging and supporting him in everything he does, navigating them through mementos and palaces and battles… and he’s never really appreciated for any of it. obviously, the other phantom thieves do the same and don’t require any extra praise, but morgana already has a complex stemming from the fact that he’s not human. inherently, he believes he’s not nearly as good as any of the others, and subsequently, that he isn’t good enough in general- and he’s so ashamed of that that he can’t even voice the concern to the protagonist pre-okumura’s palace. it made sense to me when he snapped and ran away; if you were constantly the black sheep of a group, unable to engage with anyone unless the guy you live with is always there as well, wouldn’t you yearn for autonomy too? (don’t even get me started on the haru parallels there; there’s a reason morgana snapped during the okumura arc.) if you felt expendable and there wasn’t ever an effort made to prove otherwise, purposeful or not, wouldn’t you also want to leave? to spare both yourself, and the people you’re leaving? i really liked his arc because it led to two realizations- that he was pivotal to the group, and it was fine if he ended up not being a human. (and honestly, he was pivotal to my group… who else would i use to heal everyone outside of battle…!)

anyway, his objectification of women was weird. didn’t like that. but this is a JRPG, and he’s not the only one who does strange things like that at times (why was ryuji looking at ann’s chest in the mona bus outside futaba’s palace man…). honestly, his flirting was also weird at times, but as long as it never got strangely sexual, i didn’t really mind? it’s not like it ever genuinely bothers ann either as far as i remember. it’s more just a stupid thing he does.

anyway… i dunno. i like the kitty. he’s silly, he kept me company, and he made my playthrough fun. life is so much more beautiful when you carry love in your heart rather than resentment

[h50europe]

I wish fans would stop dissecting Buck/Tommy scenes but enjoy them for what they are: flirty banter between two lovers. Oliver stated in an interview he and Tim agreed to keep this relationship on the lighter side, more like a rom-com.

But no people go and dissect it like an alien discovered by NASA in a backyard.

When Tommy throws the line, "God, I hope so," he is nothing but hinting at the age difference, which is, give or take, about 7 years. So what? Seven years is nothing. Still, Tommy refers to it but means it as a joke. And Buck even blushes a little.

I can't remember we've ever seen Buck that flirty and all smiles whenever he and one of his many GFs where together. Can't the pearl clutchers be happy for him because he is finally who he is? Without having to hide a part of his sexuality that he kept buried deep inside before he met Tommy. A side he couldn't even show to Eddie. A side he knew was there but never dared to explore? Tommy came into Buck's life and opened this cage. He understands Buck on a totally different level than Eddie ever could. We see that Eddie has no gaydar. He was also clueless about Tommy being gay. Being so close to Buck, like the tin hats want them to be, he must have realized that Buck isn't only into women but guys as well. "Buddie" lived practically out of each other's pockets. And not once did Eddie ask, "Could it be that you aren't just into girls?" In a serious manner, not as a joke.

How about dissecting Eddie's dating "issues" with the doppelganger of his deceased wife? Does this imply Eddie's into necrophilia? This is ridiculous. It would be only one of their reactions. The nicer one, I guess. But it is no different from their daddy-kink nonsense.

What's wrong with these tin hats who are constantly complaining about LIs in general. No matter if it's Buck or Eddie? Shoving your favorite ship down everybody else's throat is the opposite of being open-minded and tolerant.

If Buddie should ever become canon, they will need a lot of patience. Eddie suffers from PTSD and is mentally unstable. Now, he lost his son. He has so much on his plate already. The last thing he needs right now is Buck coming over him like a force of nature and telling him he loves him. That would be the final straw if you want to see him end up in a loony bin. Eddie has to be on his own for some time to find out what and who he really wants. Something that would have to be stretched at least over a few episodes, if not over a full season. If it should be realistic. It took them 100 episodes to address Buck's bi-sexuality. And we saw hints here and there. We never saw hints of it concerning Eddie. Why do these "fans" think you can turn him bi from one moment to the other? Like Oliver said, it's not what he wanted for his character that Buck is bi, and suddenly, everyone else around him has some sort of sexual awakening. Since when can't a bisexual or gay man can't have a heterosexual bestie?

Also, bashing and harassing an actor for a part he is playing shows how sick these tin hats are. Or do they really think they could scare him off the show with their immature behavior and their unfounded hatred? Such behavior never ended a series character, let alone made a showrunner diverge from his plans and suddenly turn his show into a fan service-only show. Get a life ASAP, you tin hats and spread your toxic behavior among your ilk. It's not our fault you're leading a sad life full of envy and h*te. I am so sorry for you all. Fueled with so much anger must turn you into embittered personalities with no fun and no friends. How many of you opened sock puppet accounts to have at least someone to talk to? Living in an echo chamber can be exhausting at times...

[iamthekaijuking]

Assorted Armored Core 6 thoughts

1: Iguazu as a character is just so fucking funny to me. Like here’s this pathetic little petty piece of shit who wants to be hot stuff but isn’t due to his own personal faults, and gets mad when he’s inevitably shown up. And then you come along and are better than him (which isn’t a high bar… I mean come on even his AC build is less than optimal) and for some reason that makes him lose his shit and now he hates you so much he’s willing to kill himself if it means killing you. Of all the people that broke him it was you, C4 621, Waltuh’s favorite little vegetable lobotomite. Michigan should have technically gotten that hatred out of him but no it’s you he hates.

2: I’ve seen some talk about what the “mealworms” the rubiconians eat are, and a lot of people think they’re tardigrades mutated by Coral, but I’d have to disagree. Coral isn’t a mutative substance, it’s just some anaerobic alien algae that explodes real good and can act like a supercomputer when in groups. It also might have a biochemistry toxic to humans since it can get us high and areas exposed to coral explosions are contaminated in some way, but it’s never been stated to directly tamper with genes. The anatomy of the mealworms also doesn’t match tardigrades that well and they only have a passing resemblance to them (their mouth anatomy is closer to that of a lamprey or hagfish, and they have too many legs). I think the mealworms might instead be alien fauna, but ones not native to rubicon that were instead brought in as livestock. Why not native to rubicon? Well the only other multicellular organisms we see in game are trees and grass that were almost certainly bought to rubicon by humans, and while rubicon 3 seems to be within the Goldilocks zone from its sun it’s definitely on the farther end of the spectrum. Every area (aside from grid, Xylem, underground, and atmospheric areas) has snow, except for where the Strider is seen, which is a desert. But desert doesn’t equal heat, it just means it’s a very dry place. Rubicon 3 might also not have a moon and we don’t know anything about its magnetosphere. Basically what I’m trying to say that rubicon 3 is a pretty tough place to live, and while multicellular life isn’t an impossibly given its conditions, it seems that the planet might only have microbial life.

3: A sort of follow up to the mealworm thing, but it seems like in the AC 6 universe humanity has discovered alien life, but never sapient ones. Any race other than humans is never mentioned, and coral is of human interest not because it’s an alien organism, but because it can act as a superfuel. Mealworms are likely also aliens. If this is all true then Coral might be the first truly sapient race encountered by humanity… and we’ve been using it as fuel and already almost rendered it extinct once… oops.

[symphonic-scream]

...new au

Fontaine Space Au

(Genshin Impact au)

Okay so there'd be three ship crews working together for the same goal, to prevent the "flooding" of the galaxy, aka an eternal cold darkness that robs all light and kills everyone. It eminates from this ancient being, corrupted over time by being forgotten and pushed aside, it's anger and resentment festering a hatred for any mortal life, this fueling it's slow consumption of all live

Three different space crews join forces when it becomes clear things have gotten *that bad*. The main crew is from the Intergalactic Federation for Unity, known as the Feds. Their ship is the biggest, and the one the three groups are all using during this journey. Their members include the likes of Neuvillette, Furina, Clorinde, Wriothesley, Sigewinne, and Chevreuse

The second crew is the Spina de Rosula, formerly a group of space pirates from the planet Poisson. However, after the change of leadership and loss of their Homeworld, they've become more like space vigilantes. Their members are Navia, Chiori, Charlotte, and Clervie (I. She's alive I can't help it)

And finally, the crew of the Hearth. A rogue unit made up of the Lost, a collection of orphans without Homeworlds to return to, led by the only mortal to ever encounter the Emanator of the Dark and live, Arlecchino. Also includes Lyney, Lynette, and Freminet

It takes a while for them all to get along and shit, but they're headed towards their goal, and all would do anything to keep the remaining lives in the galaxy safe

Under the cut will be descriptions of everyone's little backstories and races, but yeah. I have a lot of thoughts about this please send me asks about this

Neuvillette - second in command of the Fed ship the Opera Epicles, last full blood of his kind. His race is near immortal, their long lives traded off with a lack of strong emotion. He still feels, but it's different and makes it harder for them to bond with other races

Furina - Captain of the Opera, Neuvillette's cousin. Her father was a human from the Feds, and thus she's half-blooded. She developed DID during the fall of their Homeworld. Furina is more like her Father, more emotional and caring too much, while her alter Foçalors, is more like their people, and takes over when Furina's feelings and nightmares shake her too much. Foçalors sees herself as a big sister to Furina

Clorinde - last remaining member of the Wolfrend race, which served to combat the darkness for Millenia as Galaxy Hunters. She's got wolf ears and a tail, has keener senses and comes across as aloof as she's usually just trying to keep up with all that sensory input at once. Chief Combat officer for the Opera

Wriothesley - former Duke of Meropiede, joined the Feds and the Opera crew when the man-made planet inhabited by outsiders was taken by the darkness. He's human lmao

Sigewinne - from Neuvillette and Furina's neighbor planet, the population of which was able to flee to the Feds before their world was devoured thanks to the emergency signal their neighbors sent out. Has a special inclination for healing

Chevreuse - engineer and combat officer for the Opera. Her Homeworld was Poisson, like the crew of the Spina. The others didn't know she lived, since the Feds got there nearly too late, only saving ten people. She's the one that bridges the gap between the Opera and the Spina

Navia - daughter of the Lord and Lady of Poisson, and the Captain of the Spina. She was devastated when they lost their Homeworld, including her parents and personal guards. She bares the Feds for not helping them, until Chevreuse explains they got held up by the Emanator himself

Chiori: she. Got bored living in the Federation. Just hitchhiked until she got picked up by the Spina. She's. Just also there??

Charlotte - yeah she's just also there lmao

Clervie - grew up in Poisson, raised by the main community after her mother was exiled for trying to sacrifice them all to the Dark. Believes her best friend and childhood love Peruere died in the fall of Poisson. She never wanted to fight, but is doing so for her Perrie

Arlecchino - formerly Peruere. When Poisson fell, she met the Emanator herself and tried to kill them. She, of course, didn't succeed. She was saved by an Arachnid entity, taking her memories and "humanity" in exchange for the power to try again. This "curse" added the white to her hair, and changed her eyes from warm brown to black with red X's. She can't remember Poisson, and the Spina don't recognize her for a long, long while

Lyney and Lynette - their Homeworld was more jungle-like. Both have feline features, not just Lynette, and have some mysterious, nearly magical abilities that were normal on their plantet

Freminet - his Homeworld was a water planet. He's got sharp teeth and gills and a shark-like tail, and sleeps in a tank of water. He works with the engineering crew during their time with the Opera

ANYWAYS

That's everyone! I think. But yeah I love the Fontaine characters and wanted to do something with them

[twin-wings]

Vash and Knives' dynamic in the manga is extremely compelling to me. I really like how their conflict isn't a matter of innate temperaments, but the different ways in which they react to their experiences.

When they were kids, Knives was the one with the strongest desire to connect with humans. He had so much hope – and fear of rejection – that he literally started crying when he felt accepted by Conrad, the second person after Rem to learn about the twins' existence. And it's important that it was Knives, and not Vash, to say something like this:

I've always found it so interesting that between the two of them, Vash was the more cautious one. He was more reserved, quieter, and less emotional compared to Knives. And most importantly, he had fewer expectations about humans and whether or not they could become friends with them.

Vash has never been naive. He's very aware of how difficult it is for people to come to a mutual understanding – and how two beings as powerful as them will likely be seen with suspicion and fear by humans – but this doesn't mean that trying isn't worth it, not matter how many times it might fail.

What this moment conveys is not naive idealism, but an impossibly strong determination. Vash does believe that humans and plants can coexist peacefully, but he also knows it's an uphill road to get there.

Obviously Knives doesn't share the same hope. All the hope he had about humanity was crushed when he found out about Tesla. That was the day his innocence was irreparably lost.

But Knives wasn't the only one who was affected by that discovery. Vash's reaction was just as strong: we see him adamantly refusing food, trying to kill himself because he couldn't stand to be in a ship full of humans. We see him lashing out, angry and scared and unable to trust humans at all, not even Rem.

The whole flashback adds a lot of nuance to Vash's character: he knows humans are capable of terrible things, he doesn't just blindly trust them and doesn't see the world through rose-tinted glasses. But he still chooses empathy and forgiveness instead of resentment and vengeance again and again, because he knows humans are also capable of good, of changing and learning from their mistakes. Rem herself was proof of that: how she did all she could to prevent the tragedy of Tesla from happening again; how she gave her own life for everyone else, to grant everyone a ticket to the future. It was Rem who convinced Vash to have hope and gave him a reason to keep living, and it's her legacy that Vash tries to protect with his life.

Knives, on the other hand, bottled up his emotions, refusing to share his pain with Vash and Rem and using it to fuel his hatred. Knives was afraid of humans as much as Vash was, but instead of facing that fear head-on and overcoming it, he decided to eradicate the source.

The main conflict in Trigun isn't just about two brothers' ideological divergences, nor is it simply about stopping the "bad guy": it's about how good and evil coexist in human nature. Vash and Knives were bound to discover the dark side of humanity sooner or later, and they were bound to make a choice. While Knives only sees the evil that humans have done and refuses to give them a chance, Vash chooses to believe in people's potential for goodness.

They are two sides of the same coin. Both are incredibly powerful beings with the ability to exterminate humanity if they so wanted, but the way they choose to use their immense powers is completely opposite.

[deramin2]

Izzy the Leather Daddy: Queering the Father Figure Lens

In Vanity Fair’s interview with David Jenkins, he says, “We felt like Izzy’s story had reached its conclusion, where we put him through enough. And then there was the realization that he is kind of a mentor to Blackbeard and that he is kind of a father figure to Blackbeard. It felt nice to have him die and have Blackbeard be upset by it, because Blackbeard killed his father. But this is a father figure that he’s losing that it’s hard for him; it's sad and he doesn't want him to go. Izzy has such a beautiful arc in season two; he does a lot of the things, has a lot of the breakthroughs that you want that character to have. It felt like: It’s time to give him a full meal. And it’s also a pirate show, so he’s got to die.”

That’s been taken to be in a very child-like way, but that's not the only type of daddy in queer culture. Let’s examine Izzy as Ed's leather daddy figure. A kink dynamic sense of a masculine authority figure with a tough and painful love and a man who wants to be driven to greatness by submission. Not necessarily sexually, though that was always possible, but a sort of roleplay dynamic they fell into that satisfied them. Their costumes are literally leather daddy kink subculture.

Ed does have daddy issues. He rejected his own father and his abuses with violence, but we also see that left a void. He’s sought out other older masculine authority figures who promised a sort of found family, but they’ve always been just as toxic and abusive as his own father. Like Hornigold who glorified toxic masculinity and twisted Ed into needing to create the Blackbeard persona to survive. Where the abuse of Hornigolds authority begat a brotherhood beteen those who survived it like Calico Jack (and many didn’t like Felix). Even pop-pop the fisherman treated Ed with violence and reproach when he clumsily sought to reform himself into a calmer life. The men he’s looked up to have treated him as inherently worthless unless he can prove his worth. They’ve fed his self-hatred to fuel ambition.

Izzy viewed the Blackbeard persona as a revered golden child it was an honor to serve under. Even when Ed made a mess of things, Izzy saw him as worthwhile cleaning up after and protecting. He pushed and challenged Ed to further greatness and while there was still a violence to it, Ed could feel like he was finally living up to an authoritative man’s respect.

Izzy pushed Ed to keep being Blackbeard too long and it had become an unhealthy dynamic. There are also tones of Izzy being like a toxic manager who pushes a rock star too far to secure his own place. They’re both dependent on each other, using each other, and are bonded by having been to hell and back together.

Stede offered Ed a new role to play. We saw that with the clothes swapping right from the start. Stede is also assertive and dominant but in a gentler way. Ed and Stede both started reshaping each other for new roles. And then Stede paniced and abandoned him like every other man he’s sought approval from.

This pushes Ed further into Izzy’s construction where Ed plays the monster in charge that Izzy wanted him to be. But it’s goes off the rails this time. The monster that comes out is The Kraken with Izzy cast as Ed’s father. Blackbeard nearly kills Izzy and leaves him forever changed. Izzy has to rebuild himself from the ruins Ed left him in emotionally and physically. This dynamic and role for Izzy is dead.

And with the death of that role, Izzy feels like he must die. He doesn’t see any place for himself in life disabled and fallen from Ed’s favor. He begs for it. He feels like being kept alive is a cruelty and doesn’t understand why the crew won’t let him go. He only survives Ed handing him the means for suicide by chance. He stays drunk as he heals to not feel.

But the crew love who he could be (if not who he’s been), and encourage him to make a new place and take on a new role. They make him a new leg out of the damaged ship and encourage him to be a unicorn, a legendary beast of his own (one whose arrival foretells death in some stories). It’s drag mother Wee John who gives Izzy another sense of himself by giving him a Look and a new role.

He watches Ed toss his leathers overboard and the next time they speak tells Ed to listen to it and find himself. Meanwhile Izzy grapples with who he is now. He tells Stede that he’s good for Ed, but also reminds him that when Izzy said he loved Ed, Ed shot him. Izzy’s really passing on the role here. He was Ed’s partner in these scenes but it’s not healthy and it needs to be Stede and his gentler ways, now. Izzy’s figured out that’s not his place anymore. I think he’s grappling with what that place is.

Talking to Banes, Izzy evokes the same sense of community among pirate crews that have drawn queer people together for centuries through good and bad. The sort of dynamics so present in queer theater and then films like The Boys in the Band (1968, 1970, 2020) and Love! Valour! Compassion! (1995, 1997), and Fire Island (2022). Groups that are bound as much by the ways they have been hurt and hurt each other as the ways they love each other. But always push each other to be better and they will always take care of each other in meaningful ways. They’re a family and they can nurture each other. They don’t need a tough love violent daddy keeping them in line. And in a sense it’s here that Izzy makes the leap Michael from The Boys in the Band or John Jeckyll from Love! Valour! Compassion! never could: he changed before it was too late, and everyone mourned him.

In the end Izzy represents everything that drove Ed to be Blackbeard. He was Ed’s mentor for that life. He represents the old guard of piracy and their toxic ways, and even though he’s unlearning them as a character, he’s also a symbol of all that. He ends up the only casualty in a raid Ed thought was a suicide mission. Stede’s way wins the day, but at the literal and symbolic cost of Izzy’s. The death of the mentor signifies the end of what they can teach you and the hero’s call to be your own person. In a way that honors the master but puts its own path, with the student eventually returning as a new teacher.

Queer media is often very cyclical. In season 1 Ed’s wheel of fate started high and crashed down. This season it’s been dragged through the mud with the weight of the world on it. Izzy is ultimately crushed under that wheel. But he looks up seeing Ed rising again into a new cycle unlike anything he’s had before. A cycle Izzy never quite achieved, but made peace with. And so he tells Ed to go and be happy and live. The best revenge on Banes he could get is to live and die free surrounded by love and loyalty.

In queer media you often see characters who are facing death become a sort of mentor figure. Setting their affairs in order and finishing their business, they end up trying to answer what was worth living for. Buzz Hauser and James Jeckyll in Love! Valour! Compassion! or Andrew Beckett  in Philadelphia (1993) or Kit Cowan in Spoiler Alert (2022). Queer media has such a rich legacy of stories where death is not a punishment but the great reckoning with oblivion we all face. The constant companion we all walk hand in hand with not knowing when it will yank us away. For people with dangerous lives often too soon. The construct of a good death where you’ve finished your business, learned your lessons, and said everything that needed to be said. Where maybe there was so much more to live for, but at least you got closure.

He was mourned by people who often see their community through funerals burying their friends. With shock and familiarity and holding themselves together because it will not help right now to fall apart. They honor what made him him in life, and their complicated relationship like Roach getting one more middle finger in with a sad smile before passing Izzy’s grave marker along. His memory passed between all of them. Spoken of both lovingly and honestly of his faults. Because he’s all of it. His beauty was in his fullness. And he outlasted many other pirates they’ve sailed with that lived just as hard.

Izzy represents the stakes they’re facing that they’ve miraculously been lucky enough to dodge at the last moment. Like Ivan’s off-screen death and many unnamed crew members, he represents how deadly this profession is. Izzy was always afraid Stede was going to get him killed, and he was right. But it was a heroic death for a greater cause instead of for ruthless plunder. Izzy came to believe in the pirates as a revolution, not just in varying stages of fucking each other over. And in that way carries on queer media traditions of a meaningful death as revolutionary.

[https-harlow]

Mixed Emotions - Part 1 New Cities

Summary- Gabriella moves to Atlanta to go to college, and due to her apartment not being ready for 2 weeks after her classes start, she has to stay with Jack and Urban who are already living in the city. Jack and Urban take Gabriella to a house party on her first night in the city, where Jack gets jealous when he sees Gabriella talking to another guy.

18+ very brief smut

“I fucking hate you.” Gabriella told Jack, her words fueling his adrenaline as he continued to thrust his hips into hers.

“Yeah?” Jack asked. “Well, I fucking hate you too.” Jack challenged.

“It doesn’t matter how good you fuck me, my feelings for you will never change.” She told him before Jack leaned down to kiss her.

Neither Gabriella nor Jack was sure how they ended up in the situation they were in, but they did.

Jack met Gabriella when they were little, Gabriella was friends with Clay, so Jack and Clay’s mother, Maggie, would offer to watch Gabriella when both of her parents had to work. Jack hated her then, he hated how her hair was in two perfect pigtails, and the way she always wore that stupid hot pink dress, his hatred for her never went away, even once they became adults. In return Gabriella hated Jack. She hated the way he ignored her when she would ask him a question, or how they would get along for a few days, just for Jack to act like she didn’t exist.

Gabriella would be lying if she said she didn’t develop a crush on Jack when they were younger. That was before she realized how much he didn’t like her. For the first year of their “friendship”, Gabriella did everything she could to get Jack to like her, trying to talk to him about things that interested him, even if it didn’t interest her. She would even wear hair ties in his favorite color, but Jack never noticed, and if he did, he didn’t care. Gabriella eventually stopped caring, beginning to dislike Jack as much as he disliked her.

When Jack moved to Atlanta, he couldn’t wait to get away from Gabriella. He was no longer forced to be around her when all his friends would hang out, because unfortunately for Jack, every single one of his friends liked her. Along with all his family, Gabriella attended a lot of events with Jack’s family. Some when she was younger and being watched by Jack’s mom, but as she got older, they started inviting her. At a certain point in Gabriella’s life, with her Mom being a lawyer and her Dad being a doctor, she was spending more time with Jack’s family then she was her own.

Unfortunately for Jack, 2 years after he moved, Gabriella got into a private college in Atlanta where her parents were pushing her to study law, wanting her to follow in her Mother’s footsteps. Gabriella didn’t want to study law, truthfully, Gabriella wasn’t even sure if she wanted to go to college. 

Her parents rented her an apartment in Atlanta, but she wasn’t going to be able to move in until 2 weeks after her classes started. Urban had offered for Gabriella to stay at his and Jack’s apartment, at first, she denied, not wanting to stay with Jack. After Urban insisted a couple more times, and she realized she had no other option, she agreed. 

“Hi!” Gabriella greeted Urban enthusiastically, hugging Urban. Jack stood off to the side, trying his best not to roll his eyes at her. She had barely taken two steps into the apartment, and he already couldn’t wait for her to leave.

“Hey Gabriella.” Urban hugged her back before pulling away and letting her walk further inside the apartment. 

“Hey.” Jack said, leaning against the wall.

“Hey.” Gabriella smiled softly.

“Are your bags in the car?” Urban asked and she nodded. 

“Yeah, I just have two suitcases, my parents are sending everything else down once I can move into my apartment. I can go get them though.” Gabriella told Urban, and he shook his head. 

“I’ll go get them, give me your keys.” Urban said and Gabriella threw Urban her keys.

“Thank you.” Gabriella smiled at Urban before he walked out.

“You really brought two bags for two weeks, Ella?” Jack asked her and Gabriella rolled her eyes.

“Why do you have a problem with everything I do?” Gabriella asked Jack.

“I don’t.” Jack shrugged. “Two suitcases just seem like a lot for two weeks.”

“Well, for your information, it’s not for two weeks. My parents aren’t going to ship any of my stuff until I get into my apartment, so I don’t have to store it somewhere if it gets here early, so it’s really for like 3 weeks. Plus, I would rather have too much stuff then not enough.” Gabriella explained. “Plus, you know I hate when you call me Ella.” She said, crossing her arms.

“I know.” Jack smirked. “That’s why I call you Ella.” Jack said, pushing himself off the wall, reaching out to ruffle her hair before walking to the couch and sitting down. Gabriella sighed, fixing her hair as Urban walked back in with Gabriella’s suitcases. 

“So, we didn’t really think about where you’ll sleep, so you can take my room, I’ll just sleep on the couch or something.” Urban said.

“Are you sure?” Gabriella asked and Urban nodded. 

“Yeah, I fall asleep there most nights anyways.” Urban said and she nodded. 

“Thank you.” Gabriella smiled softly at Urban. “I can take my bags from here.” She told him. 

“Want me to show you where my room is?” Urban asked and Gabriella shook her head.

“I’m sure I can figure it out.” She said and Urban nodded. Gabriella took her bags, bringing them to Urban’s room. 

Once Gabriella got settled, at least somewhat, she joined the two out on the couch, all of them making small talk, but mostly Gabriella and Urban. 

“What did you decide to study?” Urban asked Gabriella.

“Uh, I decided to go to college to study law. I don’t really know if it’s what I want to do, but I figured I’ll work on a law degree until I figure it out.” Gabriella said and Jack rolled his eyes.

“Of course, you would go to fucking law school when you don’t know what you want to do instead of just taking a year off or working on an easier degree.” Jack said.

“Why does that bother you?” Gabriella asked Jack.

“It doesn’t bother me. I’m just saying it makes sense for you.” Jack said. Gabriella was a straight A student, except for the one class in freshmen year of high school where she got a B and cried. Jack thought she was being over dramatic.

“Aww, so you’re saying I’m smart.” Gabriella said, her tone almost mocking Jack.

“Aww, you think I’m complimenting you.” Jack mocked Gabriella back. She rolled her eyes.

“Anyways.” Urban cut into the conversation. “Jack and I are going to a party tonight if you want to come.” Urban told Gabriella.

“Uh, yeah, sure why not.” Gabriella accepted the invitation from Urban and Jack and Jack scoffed.

“Since when do you go out and party?”

“You know, I’ve changed since you moved 2 years ago.”

“I know, I have come home in the past 2 years.” Jack rolled his eyes. “But I still didn’t know you go out and shit.” Jack said.

“For how much you seem to hate me, you seem to know a lot about me.” Gabriella challenged.

“Well, I have known you since we were little kids.” Jack said.

“But, no, I don’t party often. I’m just in a new city and I don’t know anyone, I don’t have anything to do tomorrow, so why not.” 

“Yay, you’re going to make friends with all my friends here too.” Jack muttered underneath his breath sarcastically, loud enough for Gabriella to hear, but she chose not to comment on it.

Several hours later, Gabriella, Jack, and Urban, were all at some random house party. That night was the night that Gabriella found out that house parties weren’t her thing, but she hated how well Jack knew her, so she was determined to attend just to prove him wrong.

Jack separated from Gabriella almost immediately, Urban being the one to introduce her to all their friends. Soon after that Urban found some girl he wanted to hang out with, and Gabriella not wanting to interrupt his fun, told him to go hang out with her. 

With parties not being her thing, Gabriella ended up finding a free couch, not wanting to be in the crowded room anymore.

“Hey, you having fun?” The guy who sat down next to her asked. Gabriella laughed softly, looking over at him.

“Not really, is it that obvious?” She asked. 

“Want me to be honest?” He asked and she nodded. “Yeah, it is.” He said and Gabriella laughed again. “I’m Levi by the way.”

“I’m Gabriella, nice to meet you.” She smiled at him softly.

“So, if parties aren’t really your thing, why are you here?” Levi asked.

“Oh, I just moved here, to go to college, and I have some friends in town, well, ones not really a friend, it’s a complicated situation. Anyways, I just figured it would be nice to do something different for a change.”

“What are you going to college for?” Levi asked.

“Oh, just law.” Gabriella said.

“A law student, underage drinking, kind of ironic don’t you think?” Levi said, gesturing to her cup, both of them laughing.

“Well, I’m not a law student yet. But this is also just orange juice.” Just like parties weren’t her thing, neither was drinking, so she was glad to find something other than alcohol, even if it was meant to be a chaser for the cheap vodka it was sitting next to.

“Just orange juice?”

“Yeah, it was either orange juice or cranberry juice, and I prefer orange juice.” Gabriella said. “God, I sound lame, don’t I?” She asked, suddenly embarrassed that she was most likely the only one not drinking at the party.

“No, not at all, I find it kind of endearing actually.” Levi told her, and Gabriella blushed.

Little did Gabriella know that on the other side of the room Jack was watching their exchange. 

“Who’s that?” Jack asked Urban, pointing out Gabriella and the guy who sat down next to her. Urban glanced across the room to where Jack was pointing.

“Uh, I’m not sure.” Urban told him, giving his attention back to the girl he was with.

Jack sighed softly, continuing to watch Gabriella and Levi interact. He didn’t know it at the time, but he felt jealous watching them. Gabriella laughing at something Levi would say. Eventually, Jack forced himself to stop watching. 

Gabriella couldn’t help but yawn, leaning into the back of the couch.

“If I’m that boring, you can just say so.” Levi joked and Gabriella giggled, shaking her head. “That was, stupid I’m sorry.” Levi said, laughing with Gabriella.

“No, you’re not boring, I promise. I’m just exhausted.” Gabriella told Levi.

“Go home, don’t stay just because we’re talking.” Levi told Gabriella.

“I would, but I don’t want to make my friends leave just because I want to go home.” Gabriella said, looking over to see Urban making out with a different girl then he was with earlier. Gabriella couldn’t help but laugh to herself, shaking her head. Gabriella found Jack in the crowd, his arm around a girl’s shoulders. Something felt different from when she saw Urban with a girl, but she couldn’t quite place what it was. “They seem to be having fun, I don’t want to be the one to interrupt that.”

“I can take you home, I’m going to leave soon anyways.” Levi told her and Gabriella shook her head.

“No, you don’t have to do that.” Gabriella said.

“C’mon, you’re tired, and not having fun, I’ll drop you off on my way home.” Levi said and Gabriella thought for a second but nodded.

“Fine, but I’m not sleeping with you.” Gabriella joked.

“No sex, but I’ll take your phone number, if you want to give it to me of course.” Levi said and Gabriella pretended to think, Levi laughing.

“Yeah, I think I can do that.” Gabriella said and Levi handed Gabriella his phone so she could put her number in. “Let me go tell my friend I’m leaving.” Gabriella told Levi and he nodded. Gabriella walked across the room, finding Urban.

“You good Gabs?” Urban asked and Gabriella nodded.

“Yeah, I’m good, I think I’m going to go home though.”

“Wait how? If you want to leave, I can take you home.” Urban said and she shook her head.

“No, it’s okay, Levi’s going to drop me off on his way home.” Gabriella told Urban.

“You sure? I don’t mind.”

“Yeah, I’m sure, it’s like a five-minute drive.” 

“Okay, text me when you get home.” Urban told her, and she nodded. 

“I will.”

“I have your location on, I’ll give you seven minutes to text me, after seven minutes I’m checking your location.” Urban told Gabriella. Everyone in the friend group was extremely protective of Gabriella, with her being one of the only girls apart of the main friend group, and with her being the youngest, even if was only by two years for most of them.

“I promise I will text you the second I step into the apartment.” Gabriella promised and Urban nodded. They said goodbye before Gabriella left the party with Levi.

Levi dropped Gabriella off at the apartment, even though it was five minutes in the opposite direction of his place, he didn’t tell Gabriella that, not wanting her to feel bad. Levi gave Gabriella his number before she got out of the car, telling her to text him when she got inside. Levi waited for Gabriella’s text before he left, Gabriella also texted Urban telling him she was home.

Almost immediately, Gabriella changed from the clothes she wore to the party, which was just the first pair of jeans she could find, and random cropped oversized t-shirt with the converse she already had on. She hadn’t taken anything out of her suitcases, and she didn’t feel like dressing up anyway. She threw on a random pair of comfy shorts and a different oversized t-shirt before she washed her makeup off and got into bed, falling asleep almost instantly.

Two hours after Gabriella decided to leave, Jack and Urban decided to leave. Jack was in the driver’s seat, Urban in the passenger’s seat. Jack was getting ready to start driving when he realized Gabriella was supposed to be with them.

“Fuck, Urban, where’s Gabriella?” Jack asked, without thinking Jack reached to open his car door, ready to go back in and look for her.

“Gabriella left a little while ago.” Urban told Jack.

“Where did she go?” Jack asked, still in a panic, not knowing where she was.

“She went home, the guy she was talking to took her back to the apartment.” Urban told Jack. Jack relaxed a little bit, at least he knew where she was. Though he didn’t like that another guy was the one to take her home, but he wouldn’t admit that.

“Like dropped her off, or took her home, to have sex with her?” Jack asked and Urban shrugged. Jack started to drive home.

“I don’t know, but I really don’t think Gabriella has a lot of one-night stands. I mean, I’ve never thought about it before, and I’d prefer to keep it that way after this conversation. Why do you care anyways?” Urban asked and Jack hesitated.

“I don’t.” Jack said. “I don’t know, I just feel like it’s partly our responsibility to keep an eye on her, especially while she’s staying with us, make sure she doesn’t get involved with the wrong people.” Jack explained.

“Yeah, I guess it kind of is, but I feel like taking her to a house party on the first night she’s here isn’t the way to do that.” Urban joked, and Jack couldn’t help but laugh to himself.

“Yeah, I guess that’s true.” Jack said.

Once Jack and Urban got home, Urban went into the kitchen, and Jack went into his room. On his way to his room, Jack passed Urban’s room, seeing that the door was slightly open, he couldn’t help but look inside to check on Gabriella, seeing her asleep even though the light was on. Jack let out a breath that he didn’t know he had been holding since he didn’t know where she was at. 

Jack reached into the room to flip the light switch off, knowing that Gabriella had a hard time sleeping with the lights on, but left the door open slightly because he knew she also couldn’t sleep in complete darkness. Jack froze when he heard Gabriella stir in her sleep after he turned the lights off. 

“Jack?” Gabriella asked, looking over at the doorway. “What do you want?” She laid her head back down.

“Nothing, I was just turning the lights off for you since I noticed they were on when I was going to my room.” Jack explained and she nodded slightly.

“Okay, thank you. Is Urban home?” She asked.

“Yeah, he’s in the kitchen if you need him.”

“I don’t, I was just making sure. Goodnight Jack.” She said, pulling the blanket closer to her.

“Goodnight Ella.” Jack laughed slightly as he heard Gabriella groan.

“I hate when you call me that.” She muttered.

“I know.” Jack said before walking to his room, letting Gabriella fall back asleep.

Tag list @jackharloww @harlowcomehome @nattinatalia @hoodharlow @itsyagirljaz @heavyhitterheaux @harlowsbby @awhore4moree @harlowslefttoe @twerkforambrose @jackmans-poison @ilovenudy @taniapri @killatravtramp @easternparkway @macey234 @toocriticalharlow @lightsoutstyles @rachxc13 @iknowdatsrightbih @idktbh101

[thewritetofreespeech]

Noé x nurse reader

Established relationship

You remember when Noé got his (SEASON 2 SPOILER) hand cut off when fighting Astolfo?.... What if when he meets back up with his partner it's all cute until they notice and panic a bit like "where is your fucking hand?!!"

And he's like "right here :'("

And reader has to sew it up and reattach it.

You knew it was Noé before you even saw him. Perhaps some kind of instinct, or the fact that no one normally came into your shop with such gusto, you just knew it was him.

“Back from your mission so soon?” You asked. Finishing putting your medicines and equipment away for the day before you turned around the greet him. “I take it it went well. I was worried when you told me you were going after the Beast of Gévaudan. One here’s stories and they think the worst kind of---what happened to your arm!?!”

“Oh. It’s right here.” Noé replied, holding up his arm that was cut just below the wrist like it was some kind of coin purse or bag not to be lost.

“I can see that but what happened to it!?” You asked in alarm. Rushing to his side. “Did the Beast of Gévaudan do this?”

“Oh, Jean didn’t do this.” You were in to much shock to ask who Jean was. “A Chasseur did this to me.”

“S-Sit down…” This was all to much information for you to process. In any event, it wasn’t important. What was important was that Noé’s arm needed to be attached. “You’ve just been walking around, holding your arm, this entire time?”

“Well it happened pretty close to the end of the battle.” Noé told you. Sitting patiently in his chair like a good boy as you got things ready. “Dante offered to try and fix it while we were there, but he was afraid he’d botch it if he tried. So we all thought it best I come here.” You sigh through your nose as you come back over to him. That was probably for the best.

You fall to your knees beside him on the chair and get to work. You offer him morphine, or something to help with the pain, but he refused. Instead, you try to make this as quick and painless as possible. “I know it hurts, but just a little longer.”

“It’s not that.”

You look up from your work, though your fingers don’t stop, at Noé. Thinking his look of discomfort was from the pain. “That guy. That Chasseur. He was really strong.”

“Well they’re made that way.” You agree. “That’s why were told to stay away from them.”

“It wasn’t that though. Yes, he was strong, but it was more than that. He was fueled by rage and hatred. I’d never seen that before. I’ve never seen someone hate me, hate what I am, so much.”

Your eyes flicker up again at Noé, but then quickly back to your work. He had a pretty sheltered life from what you had been told. Living in his professor’s mansion, with Dominique and her brother. Aside from the tragedy of his death and few other unsavory parts in his life, Noé had lived a life relatively unscathed. He had probably never experienced true prejudice and hatred before.

“There is a reason that people like that join the church and the Chasseur. Vampires have a lot of mistrust in the world. And, honestly, I can’t blame them.” You told Noé as you nearly finished with his arm. “Some vampires are cruel, and vicious. But then again, some humans are too. People like that will always see the worst in others and think that as the norm. Get bitten by one dog and suddenly all dogs are bad. I wouldn’t try and take it too personally. It’s unfortunately just a normal consequence of being apart of the world.” You tie off the end of your final stitch and put your needle away.

“There. All done. Let me get you a sling and some medicine for the pain later. I know you don’t like drugs, but this will be an herbal supplement to help you sleep. Rest is important for recovery.”

“Can I stay here tonight?”

You look over at Noé, with his soft pleading eyes, and smile. “You will need to take a bath first to get the blood and travel dust off you, but yes. You can stay.”

[sufferu]

there are a lot of parallels between heinkel and subaru

realized both heinkel and subaru both have feelings of inferiority to their parents (which caused subaru to be a neet. )

heinkel is nowhere near his parents strength and felt the weight of his parents legacy

while subaru felt inferior to his father and is burdened with being called kenichis son

there is a parallel with heinkel moment in arc 9 to a moment(s) with Subaru in arc 3 ( with crusch and Priscilla ( where heinkel gets hit by the dragonkin like how Priscilla kicked Subaru and how Emilia made a comment in regards to heinkels eyes like crusch made a comment about subaru's eyes

The scene with heinkel parallels Subaru in arc 3 with crusch (where crusch pointed out that he never mentioned saving emillia while emillia thijks that heinkel isn't grieving for Priscilla (she doesn't see it in his eyes

feel like Aganua if Subaru was based of henikel

Both alcoholics

Both crippling depression

Both fueled by hatred

it feels like heinkel had his breakdown later in life to Subaru (

and tappei commented that if Subaru wasn't isekaied he kenichi would have went to Subaru and put his head back in the game and Subaru would have gotten married

In a Q&A, Tappei said that if Subaru hadn't been summoned to this world, Kenichi would have scolded Subaru and make him go to school and he later got to university and go on to live a normal life. getting married to a gi

you could say that heinkel is a native born subaru

who had his breakdown later in life after he met his wife and lost her to sleeping beauty sickness

Heinkel meet his wife before he had a crisis like Subaru did so he was able to bounce back sooner than him. But with her now gone and Rein easily being better than him it was like a rubber band and shot him even further back

Heinkel is Subaru but without an Otto. Heinkel’s downward spiral truly began when his wife Louanna fell into eternal slumber, which mirrors how Subaru became far more depressed after Rem having her name eaten. Subaru did have other friends, most notably Otto, to pull him back and realize that he is loved and give him strenght to move forward, hell even Echidna counts among the people who helped Subaru get better.

Heinkel however seemed to have suffered in sollitude and was never given the push forward that he needed. Heinkel loves children (also just like Subaru) however Heinkel could not find happiness in raising Reinhard due to Heinkels fear of how inhumanly perfect and powerfull Reinhard was.

it would be neat if they in no regrets saw agnau if Subaru and noticed the similarities between heinkel and subaru

Yeah Tappei has a type when it comes to his prospective main characters lol

[moonspirit]

As a armin arlert lover, thoughts on floch?

Ooohh Floch.

Objectively speaking, he's a good character in the respect that he truly embodies what he represents in the world of AoT. Aside from coming from the camp of people who believed Erwin should've lived, I also feel he worked as a vehicle to represent the walled-in Eldians in Paradis (ie the civilians, whose opinions we really didn't see much of). The role Floch played in AoT was basically that of the other side; the side fighting against the Alliance, the side fighting for the "lesser good" if we take the overall picture.

Floch connects with a lot of other characters. Ideologically, he's closest to Jean, imo. Both of them are selfish, driven to uphold the causes that best protect themselves, but while Jean ends up seeing the value of human life, Floch doesn't, and that fundamental difference is where they both split away from each other.

With Armin, Floch comes with a profound lack of respect and a lot of hatred, because he sees Armin as the wrong choice, unflinching in his pointing out of all of the latter's flaws. However, here, Floch has a narrow-minded view of the world and lacks empathy while Armin's is wide open and full of empathy.

With Eren, Floch sees in him what he saw in Erwin. A devil who can get rid of other devils. Reminder here that the difference between Erwin and Armin is what drives Floch to idolize Erwin so much. He's told that no matter what, the SC must keep pushing forward, whereas what he actually sees once Erwin is dead, is chaos and confusion and the unwillingness of the main SC members (our 104th) to condemn the whole world for their hatred. So Eren's determination and new power ignites a spark of hope for him. For what he believes in, Eren is a god bringing them to life. Nevermind the fact that Eren never really tells Floch the end result of his plans (that Mikasa would be the one to decide what happens, etc), Floch takes Eren's "motivation" and runs with it, fueled by vengeance turning into brute confidence and little consideration for anything else.

As for the rest, Floch is the visual representation of someone seeking power to rid themselves of fear and cowardice; and of the opinions of the masses in Paradis, a lot of whom we see agree with the Jaegerist ideology.

So Floch as a character has good character development, imo, and he presents himself as the foil to what the Alliance stand for. If not for the fact that he gathered himself an army and fought against the very same people he once fought with, he really would've lasted until the end, which is what makes his death in Odiha very sad for the Alliance who watched him die.

What Floch wanted (and by extension, Paradis) was not wrong in itself. Nobody wants to be annihilated. But Floch and the Jaegerists believed in a race of people, while the Alliance believed in humankind as a whole.

[all-things-skylanders]

Can I request Tri tip

Yes you can! I have little experience with the character myself, but he's got a cool design, and Smasher is my favorite class of Imaginator, even if I sadly haven't obtained any of the Sensei Smashers.

After looking at his moveset, I can confirm, Tri Tip looks like an absolute delight to play!

Updated Origin Story:

Tri-Tip was the chief of a faraway band of Dinosaur Hunters, renowned for their skill and strength. Among his tribe were many elites, but his closest friend and second in command was a stout, boomerang wielding beast by the name of Dino-Rang. The two of them traveled across continents beyond the world of Skylands together with their band of warriors, taking down prey that could dwarf even Arkeyans with their teamwork and gargantuan strength.

However, one thing that the band of dinosaurs had never faced in their homelands was magic. When a group of Spell Punks made their way to the home of Tri-Tip, he and his group fought them off, the same way that they would to any other invader, but they were caught in a ritual of teleportation magic, sending the group scattered across the universe.

Tri-Tip landed in Skylands, where he was nursed back to health by a village of Mabu. He learned from the Mabu that there was a legendary plant known as the Warping Walnut Tree that teleported across all of Skylands, never appearing in the same place twice. Anyone who could open one of its golden walnuts would supposedly be granted the knowledge to fix their greatest problems.

It took years, but Tri-Tip eventually made it to the tree, collecting a single walnut before it teleported away once again. When he tried to open it with his powerful horns, he had no success.

Tri-Tip was told by the Mabus that he should seek out the Skylanders, since they're the strongest warriors in all the lands, and Tri-Tip did just that, meeting with each group consecutively to try and find someone to crack the walnut. The legendary King Pen of the Senseis had no luck, nor did running the nut over with Superchargers. Wallop's hammers were to no avail, and neither was the bombs of Blast Zone. When even the mighty Tree Rex couldn't even crack the nut, Tri-Tip was about ready to give up.

Tri-Tip forged a powerful mace using a piece of each and every skylander team. Its handle was made of Imaginite, to fuel his will. Its head was an alloy of Traptanium and Supercharger steel, for maximum power, and it was forged in the Cloudbreak Volcano with the help of the Giants' strength.

Tri-Tip had spent years now, searching for the nut, trying to break it, and forging the mace, and when not even the power of one of the strongest weapons in all of Skylands, he still could not break the walnut!

With all of his options rendered null, Tri-Tip had one last lead to follow: the Eon's Elite. The longest fighting, most powerful and trained Skylanders to ever live. Tri-Tip went before them and begged for their help breaking the nut, only to come face to face with the person he had spent all this time searching for: Dino-Rang.

After over a decade apart, Tri-Tip had long come to terms with his thoughts, and upon first sight, confessed his true feelings...

Now, Tri-Tip serves as a Sensei at Skylanders Academy, since he has so much experience with each different group after working with them all for so long. He never managed to break the golden walnut, but he doesn't mind. He and his husband are plenty fine where they are now.

Other Stuff:

Tri-Tip is gay, and married to Din-Rang

Tri-Tip may be one of the least experienced Skylanders, but all the time he spent with each individual group and traveling on his own made him an easy candidate for a position as a sensei

Tri-Tip has an irrational hatred for all kinds of nuts now, an does not get along well with many life Skylanders because of it.

That's what I could come up with for Tri-Tip. Do you like it? I'm always down for feedback, as long as it's polite ^^

One of my longest origin stories yet, but he just had a lot of potential in my opinion. So much more could be done with him!

[rodricksfilipinagf]

Hate Sex (Jamie Tartt x Reader) Part 1

       I am about to unleash a lion’s share of anger. “This is your fault,” I spit as soon as I encounter Jamie in the hallway.

        “What, are you not having a good time?” He stares at me in amusement.

        I don’t have time for his shit. “What did you say to him?” I demand.

        He shrugs. “That the only reason you brought him was to make me jealous because you had feelings for me. What can I say? He had no problem believing it. Guess your little crush isn’t as hidden as you want.”

        I am beyond furious. “You are unbelievable. What, it’s not enough that you have to be the biggest pain in the ass to me at work, now you have to ruin my dating life?”

        “Oh, and what do you call banning me from bringing girls back to my place? You ruined mine first,” he fires back.

        “You are so immature. I can’t believe so many women think you’re great. It’s because none of them ever get to really know you! If they did, they’d hate you just as much as I do.” My hands clench into fists.

        “You don’t think I hate you too? This is because of you,” Jamie insists. I stalk off into a deserted hallway and he is hot on my heels. “My fucking trousers were tight enough already and you are making them worse.”

        “I’m sorry, but I don’t know how that’s my problem,” I snap, before realizing what he means too late. “Oh.” Really? This is how he admits he’s attracted to me?

        “I couldn’t get up or dance or have fun for most of the night because of you. I had to watch you laugh and dance and drive me fucking mad and I’m sick of it. I’m sick of you.”

        God, he’s so infuriating. “Well imagine how I feel,” I say in a saccharine tone.

        Before I can register what’s happening, he cages me against the wall. “Tell me. What does seeing me like this do to you?”

        Makes me want to fuck the living daylights out of him. “Barf. Who’s that obsessed with being shirtless?” The jacket only adds to the hotness, but I’m not about to tell him that.

        He smirks. “You seem to like it a lot. You couldn’t stop staring at me during dinner.”

        “Only because I think it’s absurd someone has that big of an ego. I was disgusted.”

        “Yeah, when I’m disgusted with someone I always make a point to make bedroom eyes at them while dancing with someone else.” Jamie rolls his eyes.

        “That’s not what I was doing,” I protest.

        His eyes narrow. “I want you out of my system, now.”

        “What the fuck does that mean?” My tone is laced with venom.

        “You want to show me how much you hate me?” Jamie mocks. “Fuck my brains out so I can stop feeling like this and go back to purely despising you.”

        In that moment, I’m so fueled with hatred and pent up desire that I throw caution to the wind and decide to take him up on his offer. “In that case it shouldn’t take that long,” I say. “Do your worst.”

                                                       ~

        It doesn’t take long for Jamie to book us a room at the hotel, and I use the time he spent at the front desk to get my coat and bag, and tell my co-workers I’m leaving. 

        He approaches me where I’m standing near the elevators and my pussy feels sore just looking at him. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you planned this. Get rid of my date so you can have me all to yourself.” The elevator doors open, and both of us step in.

        He scoffs. “Like I’d want you if I could help it.”

        The elevator doors close. “By the way, I hate your dress,” Jamie says. This guy is just a nonstop jerk, isn’t he? He brings his lips close to my ear. “Every time I look at you in it, I want to fuck you as hard as I can. I can’t wait until it’s off you.”

        A small hint of a smile appears on my face. “Maybe I’ll keep it on then. You really think I want to please you after what you did to me?”

        “Yeah,” Jamie chuckles. “I really do.”

        “Asshole,” I whisper as I tug him by his suit jacket closer to me. His lips crash against mine and his tongue wastes no time in tormenting mine. His right hand grabs my left ass cheek and squeezes it tight. I yearn to discard my clothes so I can feel his skin against mine.

        The elevator doors ding open, and we frantically search for our room, and he opens the door to it for us. I throw my fur coat and bag onto a chair and kick off my shoes.

        Before I know what’s happening, Jamie pins me to the bed and climbs on top of me. His lips are an inch away from mine and I can feel his hardness rubbing up against me. “So here’s what’s going to happen. I give you the best fuck of your life, you tell no one. We go back to just hating each other afterwards and never do this again.” Such a prick.

        “Fine by me,” I reply. “And of course your cocky ass would think this’ll be the best fuck of my life.”

        He smirks. “I know it will.”  He takes off his pants, and his black briefs show just how massive his dick is.

        “Holy shit,” I breathe out in spite of myself.

        He looks down proudly. “I have a pretty impressive cock, don’t I? If you want it inside you, I’d suggest taking off that dress.”

        I stare daggers at him. “Fucking arrogant bastard.” I tug down my dress, and my boobs spring free.

        Jamie’s eyes have a wicked glimmer in them. My underwear joins my dress on the floor. He slides off his briefs and kicks them to the floor.

        Before I can properly ogle his dick, his lips attach themselves to my neck as he gropes my chest.

        “What are you doing?” I ask. “Thought you wanted to keep it a secret.”

        “I do,” Jamie confirms. “You really thought I’d make it easy on you? Thought you knew me better than that.”

        “I really fucking hate you,” I seethe.

        He ensnares me in a kiss as one of his hands cups one of my breasts and squeezes it tight. My nipples harden at his touch and that bastard feels it, taking extra care to tease them with his fingers.

        He gives me an evil smile. “I know how thirsty you are for my dick, but I gotta do this first.” He flicks his tongue playfully against a puckered bud, and gives it long, languid licks, loving how tighter he’s making it, before he catches it in his teeth and bites down, making me groan.

       “You enjoying yourself, love?” His fingertips pinch my other hardened nipple as he brings my face close to his. “Admit it, you’ve wanted me to do this to you for a while now.”

       “You’re so full of yourself,” I say as my cheeks flush, betraying how much I like how he’s touching me.

        “And you’re full of shit,” Jamie counters before his mouth engulfs mine in a kiss, his hands running through and tugging at my hair. This is the best time I hate to admit I’ve had ever since coming to London, and it’s with my sworn enemy. No wonder so many girls want to have sex with him. His looks aren’t false advertising.

        I feel him easing his way inside me and I’m so wet and yearning for this that grinding against him feels so natural.        

       “Should have known you’d be nice and wet for me,” Jamie gloats. He decides to reward this by plowing his dick into me repeatedly, harder and harder, eliciting noisy groans out of me. “And you told me to be quiet,” he taunts in my ear. “You’re even louder than I was.”        

         I kiss him roughly as I feel his tip teasing around my clit. “Bet you can’t find it,” I breathily whisper against his lips. My moans of pleasure let on that he’s very, very close.        

         “I’ll do it if you tell me I’m a sex god,” Jamie declares, clearly wanting to prolong tormenting me.        

         “No, you fucking prick,” I hiss.        

          “Then I won’t get you off,” he replies. “What a shame. We were so close too.”         

          “We?” I repeat.         

         “Yep.” Jamie takes my bottom lip between his teeth and bites down hard, not above punishing me in other ways. It makes me even wetter.         

         I draw back to look at him. “Jamie,” I say. “I hate you so, so much.” His gray eyes never waver from mine. “You fucking sex god.”         

         He gives me an evil smirk. “Thanks, love.” He finally penetrates my G-spot, and I let out an ear-splitting shriek. And judging by how he finishes all over me, he got just as much out of it as I did.

       You’re a sex god, Jamie Tartt. And I despise you for it.

[drchenquill]

Character Personality Playlist Tag~

Thank you @sableglass for the tag~

So, for this, I take my beloved OC Leon Martens. I gave a little info about him, but I put it under the cut because it includes mention of death, abuse and mental ilness. So be warned. (if you don't want to read, that's totally fine, I chose "Train Wreck" by James Arthur as Leons song.)

Tagging @theink-stainedfolk , @paeliae-occasionally , @finickyfelix , @willtheweaver and open tag~

Leon is a man with many unresolved issues, starting with the guilt of being the only survivor of the car accident that killed his parents. He was left in the care of his grandparents and from that day on, his life was a living hell. His grandmother resented him and blamed him for his parents' death, saying that if he hadn't been so stubborn, they would never have driven in the rain. This guilt was drilled into him until he began to believe it. He was abused by his grandmother and neglected by his grandfather. For many years he was desperate for their acceptance, but the more he grew, the worse it got, the more he understood. He understood that he would never get the love he desperately wanted until it was ingrained in him that he didn't deserve it. At the age of 15, he developed some undiagnosed mental illnesses, more specifically schizofrenia (I'm still doing research on it). It affects his thinking, his memory and his senses. He often has trouble telling what's real and what's not. When he is under a lot of stress, he starts to hallucinate his now deceased grandmother:

"A blurred figure stands in the middle of the room. A woman, small, her back slightly bent because of her age. She's all black, all I can see are those piercing, guilt-inducing eyes. They don't blink because they must see my every mistake." He is also affected by a voice in his head that insults him, repeating words his grandmother used to tell him: "Scaredy-cat. No good. Is he shitting his pants again? Isn't he ashamed of himself? Pathetic excuse of a man." The only love he knew was that of his parents, but after that was taken from him, he was met with hatred, humiliation, and lack of care, making him believe that no one could ever love him again, and that any sign of affection would be followed by pain, fueling his paranoid thinking that everyone is out to get him. He is desperate for peace, for a sense of home he lost years ago, for someone to pull him out of the "train wreck".

Thank you for reading my rambling!!! Love you <3

[full-of-malice]

miguel o'hara & trauma

a little character analysis + my thoughts about him idk he has ptsd because i said so brief general content warnings for death, trauma, grief, suicide, and there is atsv spoilers idk if i should put warnings for that or not

miguel o'hara like all individuals with trauma, especially ptsd, has intense reactions to anything regarding his trauma. he also carries intense fear, anger, grief, and guilt, common emotions that many trauma survivors struggle with.  examples of his fear include how he fears for the destruction of the multiverse. the intense anger reactions when someone doesn't understand the weight, and the very intense anger directed at himself.  the grief that he can't seem to escape, as he's constantly shown with the heavy weight of his daughter's death on his shoulders. he is also  his guilt is what drives everything. his grief fuels him, sure, but his overwhelming guilt for his daughter's death causes him to want to make sure it will never happen ever again, at whatever cost that it takes. it's the only way to ever repay the wrong that he had done. miguel's guilt and rage are the only things that are driving him through his day to day life, since he feels he has the entire multiverse on his shoulders, and the devastating guilt of his daughter's death on his mind, leaving him in a perpetual state of exhaustion. does this excuse his actions that he made in his intense rage such as physically chasing teens? no. does it give an explanation? yes.  understanding miguel's trauma is important to understanding why and how he functions. it goes far beyond sad silly man, it leans into a moral debt and spiraling emotions that lead him to do what he does. he's constantly in an environment surrounded by what caused his trauma, which is an incredibly triggering and stressful work life. he is never given a chance to take a step back or separate himself from it. always surrounded by something that hurt him in a way that cannot be undone but his sense of moral debt and heavy guilt doesn't allow him to remove himself from the situation to give himself a break or allow himself to get the proper help that he needs while this is already an intense and struggling situation to be in mentally, miguel struggled a lot before even finding the dimension where he had a daughter, he has a very strong and intense implied prior trauma. going off of some of the world building and my slight knowledge of the comics [i'm. not a fan of the comics!miguel but simply going off of world building] there is a lot of corruption, with the top layer of the worlds being perfect areas for the wealthy, but only for the poor or lesser peoples living below the surface of the earth. this is briefly implied through the chase scene in atsv when miguel is chasing down miles.  so in this world it's already messed up. he's implied to have had a hard life. miguel had turned himself into a spider person, and often viewed himself as a monster. he couldn't come to terms with who or what he was, could never fully be okay with the fact that he wasn't human anymore. this self hatred it came to a point in the comics were he was even suicidal.  not to mention that he likely has a strange complex that comes from the borderline psychological horror of invading a person's life and not being the person that they think you are, when he replaced gabi's father in the other dimension.  all of this comes to the point where on top of already having mental health issues, he also had to death with the death of his daughter, and having that weight and guilt on his mind.  all in all he makes for a very sympathetic character who does things that are wrong and inexcusable, in a misguided attempt to do the right thing.

if you read this whole thing thanks a lot for deeming this incoherent mess of words worthy of your time i had a lot of fun writing this actually