#and he can't understand why
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This is just my own interpretation, and I very much do not say that other reads are wrong or that people shouldn't write romantic/sexual qijiu fic, which I've read plenty of and is great, but
I think it's also valid to read Yue Qingyuan and Shen Jiu's relationship as being neither romantic nor sexual
they are still 100% each other's most precious person but in an entirely platonic way. This read to me mostly comes from the fact that their bond -- which was so strong that the splintering of it kicked off a sequence of events that led to the downfall of their sect and arguably to the end of the world -- formed in their childhood on the streets, before either of them had gone through puberty. And, critically, although they met again when they became teenagers and then adults, their relationship never advanced in any kind of positive direction after that.
I don't think Shen Qingqiu was Yue Qingyuan's white moonlight, or the one he got away. I think he was the one he couldn't save, and the inability to save him hollowed Yue Qingyuan out. It was a wound that was inflicted early enough that it took up half his world, and only grew as he did. I think you don't have to be romantically or sexually interested in someone to love them enough to be willing to die for them.
I think you can get a valid read of the situation that Yue Qi and Shen Jiu's relationship was never romantic, let alone sexual.
#svsss#platonic soulmates send tweet#mind you I think you also could play in all sorts of fun directions starting from this basis#what if Shen Qingqiu's distrust of Yue Qingyuan was based in part that *he* thought Yue Qingyuan desired him sexually#and that tripped off all his traumas#what if romantic interest was something that could have grown if they'd ever reconciled (but they never did)#what if after Shen Jiu's death and Shen Yuan's arrival on the scene#Yue Qingyuan's feelings began to change to something less platonic#and he can't understand why#or what if it doesn't. what if yue qingyuan is never a romantic rival at all.#what if literally all he wants is to be shen qingqiu's big brother.#and he doesn't get that until his beloved little brother is dead
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the easy grip on the knife. the leg over the seat. the hand over the other seat. the sassy "come get it" move. you know the bitch is smiling behind that mask even as he said the line.
#i can't believe i'm saying this#DEADPOOL CAN GET IT#Logan I'm sobbing I understand why you lunged at him#I would too bestie#it's the sass for me folks#paint that car white as much as they painted it red my god#a deadpool thirst post? from me? more likely than you'd think#this is a branch in realities i know it#i've never had Feelings for this motherfucker until this movie#all i'm left with is anger now because WHAT DOES HE WANT FROM ME#camera crew could have just made it landscape but noooooo they had to do a medium shot of this son of a bitch#i'm sending an especially affectionate fuck you in ryan reynolds' direction#i love how you love deadpool#deadpool#wolverine#deadpool and wolverine#wade wilson#logan howlett#poolverine#deadclaws#don't get me wrong i've always adored deadpool's personality. nobody's that hilarious and not have humongous balls i mean trauma.#but i've never went 'why he kinda' until this specific shot right here#@ camera crew why the fuck did you zoom in? WHY?#for me? well it's infuriating#do it again#gif is credit to the owner#30 tags aren't enough for me to dismantle how this shot made me feel. tumblr you gotta update#damn tumblr i'm tryna feed a village here#guys just find my other post
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Now he is in a safe place
This dummy has only 4 bucks but in love there are no small things!!¡
#my art#speeding bullet#sniperscout#tf2#tf2 scout#tf2 sniper#sniper x scout#tf2 speeding bullet#tf2 fanart#team fortress scout#tf2 speedbullet#speedbullet#You got me#my favorite trope is Sniper doing romantic things without fully understanding that they are romantic#he just doesn't know why he can't get scout out of his head!!!#Now please go to kiss that man
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FORGETTABLE-AU (Page 61-64)
* I-I don't think we were talking about the same thing...
[BEGINNING] [PREVIOUS] [CONTINUE]
#FINALLY FINISHED THIS WOHOO#Okay so#I have been keeping this small part of info secret for SOOOO long and it was so funny that JUST this week I got a ton of asks about#Wingdings' voice and I was SO tempted to talk about this little detail#BTW I DIDN'T FULLY MAKE THIS UP#i mean#Yeah I did#BUT IT IS BASED ON SOMETHING I NOTICED!!!!!!#When redacted talks in Wingdings the sound is clean#but when we listen to entry 17 (which is most likely a recording)#There's a VERY loud overlay of garbage noise#And so I was like#I could use this.........#like yeah a sound based on symbols?? we can't understand it! but our brains might do the work for us and maybe try to understand it?#but recording it goes very bad.....#I thought it was fun so I made it a hc for Gaster#and then I applied it here :D#lol#I think the pacing of this one is also a bit too fast but ehh#I hope it's clear#I am so proud of how I drew Alphys in these pages I feel like I am finally understanding her shape and how I want to stylize her#Sans is very good at reading people#He can tell when people are lying#that's why Wingdings didn't lie! he just conveniently forgot to tell him some details about what they found#okay yeah that's enough#TIME FOR THE TAGS#undertale#forgettable-au#forgettable-au-comic#sans
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The Justice League summons the ghost king for help with a ghost who escaped and is causing chaos. He agrees, captures them and all is good. As he is leaving they ask where the ghost went. Danny says, "I souped them as punishment."
Naturally, the Justice League comes to the conclusion that being cooked into food is a normal punishment in the infinite realms. Which, like, kind of fucked up, but also it's not their place to do anything about it. They can't control another realm's laws, so they just let it go.
Anyway, Danny keep working with the Justice League now and again, but he does get weird looks. Oh well, maybe him being dead makes them uncomfortable? Or maybe just because he is a king that he makes them nervous? He decides that he should try giving them a gift, something to make them realize he really is a nice friendly guy.
And what is a better offering of friendship than food? And what is the most comforting food? Soup.
#danny can't understand why no one wants to eat the soup he so lovingly made#danny phantom#danny fenton#justice league#ghost king danny#dc comics#dc x dp#dc x dp crossover#dc x dp prompt#dpxdc#dp x dc crossover#dp x dc prompt#dp x dc au#dp#dc#my post#implied cannibalism
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"your bias is your personality" my bias:
❝I hope people can take a break, self-reflect, and look back on their goals. I wish that everyone, including myself, would not neglect themselves because they are too focused on their work, when working or doing something. Rather, I hope they can think about their health and happiness, and other aspects of their mental well-being. Sometimes it's okay to take a break.❞
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, KIM TAEHYUNG! (dec. 30, 1995)
#taehyung#kim taehyung#v#taehyungedit#bts#btsedit#btsgif#gif#gifs#maknaelinegifs#userkelli#usersky#annietrack#userdimple#raplineuser#rjshope#tuserandi#useremmeline#creatyoon#usermaggie#bladesrunner#dailybts#one day annie (kimtaegis) said “i understand why tae is one of your bias” and that ... that will be forever with me...#happy tae day#i wish nothing but all the love of this world for this lil bread here#i could never put in words how much he saved me and how many times i felt really loved by him#since the day i met him i never felt alone again#i love him with EVERY cell of my body and more!#can't wait to see him back... 🤍
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Ellie(Dani) didn't realize how dangerous Danny's home was for him until he was more worried about her when she got her own home. - Prompt I think(?)
Ellie wasn't sure how to feel when Danny excitedly animated her to accept Arthur's invitation to live in Atlantis.
"Just if you want of course, but you'll get a stable home, and Frostbite said living underwater might be good for your water cores stability."
She had already been planning to accept the offer. Once she gave the guy an opportunity to have some sort of conversation, the guy was pretty chill, and the castle was pretty cool. So yeah, she was going to accept the offer.
But for some reason Danny's eagerness for her to go with Arthur hurt. It felt like he was trying to get rid of her.
She knew that was ridiculous, she didn't even live with Danny. He looked out for her, and was always a call away but, as much as Danny parents her, he was just a child like her. It made sense he was happy to give away the responsibility of taking care of her.
So when Ellie moved into Atlantis, she was expecting to hear less from Danny. After all, she had settle down, and he didn't need to worry about her adventures anymore. That was Arthur's and Mera's job now.
Weirdly enough, it was the complete opposite.
Now that Ellie was living with adults, Danny seemed MORE worried for her. They went from a call once a week or so, to almost daily calls in the afternoons. He would be more insistent about her telling him if anything was wrong.
He would ask specifics about the food she was eating, and her activities of the day, and her room, and the castles security...
Sam had told her that it was because he used to be able to monitor if she was eating well through the transactions of the debit card they had given her. Tuck had told her that he used to evaluate how safe she was through the phones location, and the hotels receipts.
And well, maybe she underestimated how much attention Danny put on her before, but the way the calls went made it seem like he thought she might be in more danger now that she had a stable home.
Which made no sense, because unlike him, she didn't even need to hide her ghostlines. Anything that was out of normal for Atlanteans was excused with meta-abilities, she didn't need to worry about being classified as a non-sentient species.
That was when it caught up to her. Danny was worried now that she was in a stable home because his stable home had always been dangerous for him. It isn't even a think of it being dangerous now that his a ghost, it has been dangerous ever since he was a child. She remembers all of Jazz's rants about how unreliable their parents have always been.
The food has always been contaminated. The security now attacked him directly, but there had always been a possibility of it malfunctioning and hurting the residents. Him and Jazz had always had the responsibilities of not only keeping the house clean, but the lab as well. If she tops it with the house security system attacking him, and his parents been ghost hunters...
Ellie hadn't found it too dangerous back then, Danny mocked Jazz rants with her, and Jack and Maddie were kind when they interacted with her in her human form. The Fentons neglect seemed liberating in comparison to Vlad overly controlling nature. But thinking about it now, after two months living in Atlantis, she doesn't like the picture.
She doesn't like the idea of Danny being somewhere so unsafe, but where would he go? He doesn't have a water core like her, and even if he had gotten sorta used to shapeshifting, he isn't good enough to live in a second form, which isn't recommendable either way. So he wouldn't be able to move underwater with her.
More so, she doubts that Danny would like to leave his Amity, he had taken the sole responsibilities of dealing with the whole humans - ghost conflicts. With the anti-ecto acts, there's no way he would leave the portal unsupervised.
What should she do now? Should she talk with Arthur about it? He said he was part of the heros friend group, what if they already know about the anti-ecto acts and are okay with it? What if they change hoe they act with her when she tells them she isn't actually an atlatean meta?
#Danny knows that a stable home should be better that Ellie jumping from side to side#But he can't help but be more worried about her now#He himself doesn't really understand why#Home has never been safe for him even if he likes to pretend it is#And his scared Ellies new home is the same#Ellie never revealed that she was a halfa#Arthur met her while under water and somehow got to the conclusion of meta with Atlantean ascendance#Anti-ecto acts are still up#Ellie doesn't trust Arthur enough to talk about that yet#She isn't sure how to approach the subject either#But maybe she can push forward to get her template in a safer environment.#dc x dp#dcxdp#dp x dc#all i know about both dc and dp is from the fandom#ellie phantom#danny phantom#aquaman#arthur curry
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so why is Luka obsessed with Hyuna anyway?
(mostly just trying to get my thoughts on Luka down before blink gone rewires my brain)
every pet human is extremely limited in freedom, but Luka's case is definitely the worst literally even his birth was by Heperu's design... he can't control any aspect of his own life, from his participation of ALNST (twice!) to what he eats on a daily basis
*translations all by whatafruit
humans have no power over segyein, and Luka doesn't even have any power over own his own body so what can he have power over, then?
other humans, of course
most obvious in round 5: Luka would've had an easy win even if he barely tried, but he goes out of his way to provoke Mizi anyway until she finally snaps... and he smiles as he's beaten
because this is his "power." he successfully manipulated Mizi into reacting, proving he has some control over the situation no matter how pointless it is in the grand scheme of things, this is all he can influence, so he makes the absolute most of it and this control is so important to him he doesn't care about his own physical injuries
it's Hyuna talking in this comic, but clearly reflecting Luka's own mentality
while for Hyuna it's likely just her love for singing and performing (whatever happens, they can't take this away from her) for Luka I imagine it's the ability to influence others from the stage (crushing his opponents, but also shaping his fanbase?)
...so back to Luka -> Hyuna
it’s mentioned more than a few times that Hyuna’s a really talented performer, but seeing their respective stat pages really drives it in


(think the “superiority test” Hyuna was put through relates to this also)
Hyuna doesn't seem to have been created in any special way like Luka was… she just has a natural affinity to performing. and that's enough that she’s considered a real rival to Luka—Luka, who was literally made for this, and put through constant hellish training on top (the pain of having your heart stopped...) to mold him into the perfect idol
to Luka… if he can’t dominate Hyuna, he can't even take pride in his own ability (that everything he's forced to go through amounts to something?). and power over other humans is all he has, so he needs to overpower Hyuna (also he likely admires Hyuna’s talents at the same time, which just adds to his twisted feelings)
so since his ability isn't enough... by making someone think of you, only you… that’s another way of having power over someone, isn’t it
“your life is mine” “I told you I only wanted one thing”
whatever exactly happened with Hyunwoo… well that certainly worked. both removing Hyuna's most important person and making Luka someone she can't not think of (oh and he doesn't seem particularly interested in Hyunwoo despite how similar the siblings are in personality? Hyunwoo was even the first to approach Luka, not Hyuna so it's likely because he doesn't have his sister's talents)
but you know how his intimacy(?) value for her is only 70% I figure that's because she escaped, so they could never actually face off onstage... maybe he's disappointed in her "wasting" her ability
what all this amounts to is that she did end up escaping his control, and he never even got to compete against her. so until he can somehow completely overpower her, he'll be obsessed with her
I wonder if this represents his final effort to that... ultimately, he values control over his own well-being, so if he can goad Hyuna into killing him, then doesn't that cement his power over her?
and maybe "saves" him from this hellish life too
kind of a tangent, but I really like how their designs contrast this dynamic Luka looks really angelic and androgynous, so from appearance he seems fragile and like someone to be protected (which even Hyuna seemed to be tricked by when they were younger) and Hyuna obviously looks the stronger one in comparison (very #girlboss (lol...))
but their relationship is one where Luka's trying to control her and Hyuna's trying to escape it... that "beautiful lady" line of ruler of my heart always felt somewhat uncomfortable, and then learning it's actually pitiful (가련한) instead of beautiful is... ...it's a very gendered dynamic, if you get what I mean. despite their surface-level appearances going against what's considered typical
#feel free to send me asks to argue btw#im being completely serious here i wanna discuss alnst oTL#alien stage#alnst#alnst luka#alnst hyuna#hyuluka#well it's... about their relationship...#im not going to try to make sense of his relationship chart comment bc my only reaction is 'is he stupid'#ndfgkd#but the artbook rly has a lot#i can't think of round 5 without thinking of rgu so that probably influences my view of luka too...#btw you're lucky im stopping myself here and not going into some excessively pointless tangent#about how he compares and contrasts with ivan#i can make posts without talking about ivan i prommy#'but you're talking about him now' tags don't count#if you somehow got all the way down here can u listen to 'do you want to fight me' by venus hum#why mention that on this post specifically? if u listen you'll understand trust me
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Jason: No, I don't care if no one can look after Replacemet except me. Just drop him near some dumpster, he'll be alright.
Jason 3 seconds later: Welp, I guess this is my kid now. Batman can find himself another, he's quite talented in this.
#Jason made a terrible mistake looking in Tim's puppy eyes#and everyone else made a terrible mistake leaving Tim with Jason#because now he is threatening everyone with a gun if they come closer than 15 meters#and Damian can't understand why everyone is fighting over Drake#art#dc fanart#dc#tim drake#batfam#batbros#jason todd#tim drake fanart#jason and tim#jason todd fanart#tim and jason#tiny tim#tinytim™#timmy#украрт#укртумбочка#укртамблер#український tumblr#ukrart
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"JC should have defended WWX and the Wen remnants-" babe he has no political capital right now. He's rebuilding his sect from the ground up after a war. He's been locked out of the Venerated Triad. He's the youngest sect leader. How could he have defended them and not doomed himself and his sect all over again.
#this isn't about defending his decisions or not this is about actually understanding why he can't do whatever he wants#if he wants to keep himself and his sect alive. it's not that hard to understand!!!#already resolving to ignore the comments on this#jiang cheng#jiang wanyin#mdzs#mo dao zu shi#the untamed#the grandmaster of demonic cultivation#i'm saying stuff#also on a personal level why should he defend the wens. did y'all miss the message that family is very very important in this time#isn't defending the wens a betrayal to his dead family and sect??? why tf would he want to defend them??#not gonna get into the siege of the burial mounds that's a Lot to talk about
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[Hi, Hello, like 8 people wanted more of what I wrote about Strange Omega Qinghua so I guess I'm delivering on that]
[The Prequel]
To Shang Qinghua, scenting is a useless phenomena.
He understands it theoretically. It's the process in which an item is marked with the pheromones of an individual to indicate an underlying social context.
The problem is, he has no idea what it's actually like.
Despite his omega status for his secondary gender, he has never actually participated in the process. Being scent blind, the smell of pheromones is something he is unaffected by, and as something that's so key in the use of social interactions, it forces Shang Qinghua to really be able to understand other cues to give a tell on how things work.
For the major characters, he doesn't need a tell. He has wrote them down with painstaking detail, dedicating chapters and paragraphs and enough words that it would make a novel feel like a drabble in comparison. He can see the twitch in Liu Qingge's hand whenever he wants to hunt, the movement Shen Jiu's fan does when he's pissed, and the way Yue Qingyuan's smile becomes a little more lifeless whenever the Qing Jing Peak Lord passes him silently.
For the characters he didn't write, he sometimes fumble. He can't smell them sometimes when they hide their anger but after years of practice, he can tell when they're mad.
It was what made him advantageous when it came to deals. Though he could never tell when a merchant was happy with the deal or not, he would be unable to be intimidated by scent. The scent of particularly aggressive suppliers who uses their scent to pressure their business partners into agreeing to a more lucrative agreement find trouble with Shang Qinghua, he simply sits casually, as if the room that is heavily intoxicated with the scent of danger was only a figment of your imagination.
But scenting itself is an instinct, an instinct that Qinghua does not have. Sure, he can emit pheromones, but it's a rocky attempt at best, and uncontrollable at worst, with the scent of these pheromones coming out at random with no clear way to start or stop. Scenting is an intentional process that relies on a person's innate ability to imbue an object with the smell of them.
It's not like he can smell it anyway.
It's why, despite his Omega status, he has never shared his scent with other omegas. it would be impossible to properly practice normal omegaverse customs without the capabilities to do so.
In my idea of the Omegaverse, people give and mark their scents to each other regularly to indicate their belonging to a pack, whether it be something such as a family, or an organization like Cang Qiong. Many have tried to gift Shang Qinghua these in the form of pillowcases, robes, or accessories.
But ignorant to his own place in the world and the way people feel about him, he takes this as his role on An Ding to be inadvertently assigned as an outer disciple in charge of the laundry; and being charged with the task of becoming the Peak Lord of An Ding by the system, he swallow his pride to take it in stride, washing vigorously and returning them back to the person in pristine and sterile condition.
This has caused strain and even a punch to the face for Qinghua, with him wrongly assuming it was simply his destiny to be mistreated. Of course he's treated like dirt, ut's probably why he became a traitor in the first place. Time passes, and he slowly gets less and less of these gifts and continues his unprecedented distance to the people of his peak.
Maybe it was why it was so easy for the people in the caravan to throw him to the man who would one day be his demise, a sacrifice for a world that values the people of their pack so highly, that seems to place such a significant weight over protecting their own.
(He hears the whispers that pity him, that suspect him, that makes guesses on why he survived, all of which center around his distance. That the demon had came for Cang Qiong specifically and his detachment gave him an out to lie about his allegiance and pass himself off as a bystander who was just unfortunate enough to be there. He seems pitiful enough, why not let him live.)
Maybe it's also why Mobei-jun has such a hard time trusting him for so long. You would assume from a man that said he would dedicate his entire life to you, that he would give everything to be your servant, he would be unashamed in being part of your pack. That he would show a visible attempt at indicating that. Pride for your pack is important in such a territorial world.
He's grated that his subordinate seemingly refuses to show his loyalty by keeping his scent, that whatever he has marked will be scrubbed into sterility.
(Shang Qinghua was once asked by his fellow disciple what that scent was, and it clicked pretty fast that Mobei-jun was marking his things. He stays up late and scrubs and replaces everything regularly, praying that the system gives him a hand if it wants the plot to stay on course.)
#svsss#mxtx svsss#mxtx#shang qinghua#mobei jun#moshang#cqms#an ding peak#The theme today is the olfactory system#Shang Qinghua can't smell his pheremones but they bring you thoughts of scratch paper and melon seeds#The misunderstandings are so interesting cause SQH and the other An Ding disciples see each other as the bully#Shang Qinghua doesn’t understand why people are so mean to him when he brings them their clothes back after doing the laundry#The other An Ding Disciples are pissed cause they're trying to include him into the pack but he keeps refusing#It's the same thing with Mobei#omegaverse#abo
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winchester family "therapy" part I
part I - part II - part III
#sam trying to focus on dean's grief & force him to talk about it in a fake therapy session for a hunt#i still can't believe people are using this as a reason for why dean would be bad at therapy.#i think anyone would react badly being forced to go to therapy and talk about how they're feeling like this#if anything i think it's an example of sam not understanding how therapy is supposed to work and thinking he knows best what dean needs#spn 13x04#spnedit#dean winchester#spn#supernatural#altarofrowena#jenna.gif#winchester family therapy
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I think it would be very hilarious to write Idia with a girlfriend for years and no one found out about it, not because he doesn't share, they just thought she was not real. Probably another 2D, anime girl he likes, and yapping about as always.
And it turns out to be the Prefect. The prefect that was admired by everybody, adored, and loved. They choose Idia out of all the bachelors they can have out there. And the most shocking thing about it is Idia not being negative about their relationship.
He seems confident, sure, and very soft towards you. He just raises his eyebrow when asked, how did it happen? And just shrugs it off and replies, "Obviously, because it's me."
#I wanted to see Idia's complete 360 attitude when they're around#imagine he is now very comfortable around you have been together for a while#the shock to everyone because they just found out about it and can't process why Idia is not saying anything negative#like how he doesn't deserve you#or how he self pities#they just don't understand that you have been together for so long that Idia knew and trusts your love for him#he knew that you love him and it is sincere#Slow burn is not my forte so I am still thinking writing this#idia shroud#twst idia#idia x reader#twisted wonderland idia#twst idia shroud#idia shroud x yuu#idia shroud x reader#idia shroud x you#twisted wonderland x reader
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new chapter 7 installment dropped how we feelin????
YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
THAT'S HIS DAD
#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 6 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 6 spoilers#BABY DRAGON BABY DRAGON BABY DRAGON#i will take three thank you#god. lilia really has no idea how incredibly loved he is huh.#meleanor: (dies to protect him and her son)#malleus: (is literally born having a huge destructive tantrum because he wants lilia back)#silver: (bases his entire life and personality around how much he loves his dad)#lilia: wow i just can't understand why everyone is so upset about me dying#(somehow sebek ended up being the most normal about him and there's the most unexpected part)#man i really gotta redo lilia's um poster. i wasn't super happy with it to begin with but now there's like. fun shapes and context!#me: ha ha why is his magic called that. that's so weird.#me later: o-oh. oh i see.#SPEAKING OF SEBEK THOUGH there he is! THERE HE IS!#i was so afraid the armor was going to be a bad thing but NO he earned it!#he shook out his hair and turned out to have been beautiful all along!#episode 7 is about two things and two things only: dads and significant hair moments#and also speaking of dads!#i am taking lilia mistaking malleus for revaan based on his voice#as one more tick in the 'if crowley is revaan then there's going to have to be a really good explanation' column#the dulcet tones of dire crowley...#on the other hand if crowley tears off his mask and immediately starts sounding like malleus that would be THE funniest way to do it#auuuggghhhhh it's only been out for hours and already i'm like next part when#we've been cliffhanger'd again lads#idia finally came back to us and they were like 'please wait for the next release :)'#ortho did...did you somehow hack your way into silver's dream palace
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"akane is straight, she never liked girl ranma" "nah akane is a lesbian, she doesn't actually like boy ranma"
#ranmasexual akane rights#i don't know why on earth she can't be seen as liking ranma regardless of form#then again i often see ppl understanding ranma as either just just a boy or just a girl as if he's not a literal genderfluid character#or treating girl ranma as a SEPARATE character#you would think its called ranma 1/2 cuz so many can only envision half of that mf#as always i blame the old show#rankane#ranma ½#ranma x akane#akane tendo#tendo akane#ranma saotome
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So I've said multipe times now (here and here) that thinking nmj is just so blinded by privilege he doesn't undertand that acting out of line gets people killed is, in my opinion, a misunderstanding of his character that ignores the part where he's, you know, actively dying the whole time and thinks that's a good thing. But that doesn't mean I don't think privilege plays no role at all in how he views the world.
Specifically, his view that death (at least premature or violent death) means something.
Death isn't always a tragedy to NMJ, but it is always meaningful. If you kill an evil dangerous person for your righteous cause, that death had meaning. There was evil in the world and now there is less of it. Similarly, if you die in the pursuit of your righteous cause, that death has meaning, because the sheer dedication you gave to it that you were willing to die for it will further that cause, and your bretheren will be invigorated by your sacrifice to fight even harder.
If a death isn't meaningful, that's an injustice and it is up to the living to give it meaning. That's what cuts so deep about his father's murder. There were no consequences, no changes, no meaning. Wen Ruohan was just going to get away with it! He fights and wins an entire war to make it mean something, to make it so that the unjust murder of Nie Mingjue's father is part of Wen Ruohan's downfall.
But this is a view he can only hold because he's the kind of person who's death will be meaningful. Most ordinary people's deaths are meaningless. Not ontologically, not inherently, but they are made meaningless because no one cares. For death to be meaningful you either have to be so powerful that anything you risk your life for will be impacted in some way. (Like, say, if you sacrifice a long life for immense martial power in a faustian bargain with a blade) Or if people with that kind of power care enough about you to do so for you. For most people, this isn't true. A starving street kid has no power to change the unfair world that put them there, even if they risk their life trying, and no one will do it for them once they die.
Nie Mingjue knows this in abstract, and of course rightfully believes it's wrong. But all that does is make it yet another righteous cause people should be willing to die for. Everyone's deaths should mean something, we'll make it so or die trying!
This is what the conflict between nieyao is about at its core. Because Jin Guangyao, fundamentally, cannot conceive of his own death as meaningful. Nie Mingjue grew up around powerful men who could change the world but refuse to do so because god forbid they risk a single hair on their perfect heads. Meng Yao, on the other hand, grew up in an environment where no one of importance would blink twice if you died. He was surrounded by meaningless death. Indeed his entire early life is defined by that lack of care.
Meng Shi dies and no one cares. Meng Yao gets thrown off a flight off stairs and no one cares. He has to be the one to do the caring, and once he's gone no one else will do it for him.
So he has to live.
Jin Guangyao eventually gets far enough that he actually does aquire the power to change some things... as long as he's alive. If he changes too much, holds on too tightly to his ideals, he'll die and it'll all be for nothing. He can't sacrifice himself for his goals because doing so would immediately render those goals unobtainable. No one will care about what he tried to do. He won't be a heroic sacrifice, he'll just be trash that finally cleaned itself up.
And well... Nie Mingjue dies, and someone makes it mean something. Makes it mean so much that the entire story of mdzs would not exist without it. Jin Guangyao dies and it doesn't mean anything. Most people are glad to be rid of him, and the few that are not don't do anything to change that.
#mdzs#mdzs meta#nie mingjue#jin guangyao#meng yao#nieyao#of course the inherent tragedy is that nmj is totally THE guy to ask if you want your death to mean something#nmj's reaction the the fact that most ppl's deaths are meaningless is to go: yes and I should change this.#If everyone thought like me this wouldn't happen anymore I simply need to get EVEN MORE HARDCORE about justice to MAKE them care#and this quality- which makes him the one person perhaps capable of making jgy's death mean something- also makes him a threat to his life#so jgy kills him because he needs to live. And then his beliefs about the meaninglessness of his own death are doomed to be true#what else was he supposed to do? just die and TRUST that someone would make it mean something?#like his mother trusted that his father would come back for them?#of course he can't do that.#just like how nmj's upbringing means that by the stairs he can't see how jgy- son of a sect leader and extremely capable-#is any different from the men who wrung their hands and told him that wen ruohan is just *too powerful* they can't do anything about him.#(*guy who killed wrh and wil go on to kill jgs voice* i just can't do anything about my dad being evil)#if jgy had agreed to risk his life and asked nmj to make it mean something if he died nmj would have said yes.#which is why he can't understand jgy wouldn't just ASK that.#jgy meanwhile has not been informed that was a fucking option and if he was wouldnt be able to trust that it'd actually happen.#for reasons outlined above#ahhh tragedy and inability of characters to understand each other i love you
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