#and guess what. zero progress!!
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sideblogformentalhealtshit · 4 months ago
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They day ppl finally stop telling me "you'll like it after a 1,000 tastes", "just keep trying and you'll get used to the food", "you need to try new foods", etc. etc. will be the happiest day of my life. I'm so sorry I'm not willing to subject myself to years of constant torture and misery for the faint hope I might someday be able to eat one or two more things. I simply don't think stress and throwing up are going to fix my severe lifelong sensory processing issues. I mean all power to those who decide for themselves that's the thing they wanna do, but baby I ain't gonna 'recover' bc there's no 'before' or version of me without these issues so fuck off <3
#personal#arfid#avoidant restrictive food intake disorder#ed#eating disorder#ed tw#it's not like i didn't try :)#when i was younger and my food issues were less severe- GUESS WHAT?!#i did the fucking food therapy! non-stressful well done and executed exposure therapy to an easy food#i did that for YEARS!#and guess what. zero progress!!#it did nothing for me i did not grow used to the food at all and it did absolutely nothing to improve my eating#ages 3-13 i consistently was always doing something and going to doctors and trying new things to help me#and there was never any progress#my arfid has only gotten worse since then and everyone who actually knows me#(doctor therapist friends family and such)#all agree that i'm never gonna 'recover'#if i put in the effort i could expand the foods i regularly eat to reach a balanced diet#there are just enough different foods i can eat that it is possible for me to remain healthy#but due to other problems (such as depression) that's not currently something i'm doing#my goal is to someday be able to eat justtt enough foods of varying types to maintain a healthy diet#that's it. i'm not interested in expanding my diet. i'm not interested in trying new things. none of that is a realistic goal for me#so if ppl could stfu when they don't know me and don't know what they're talking abt that'd be great 😊😊😊#mm i also think ppl rly understimate the amount of food-related trauma you gather simply by having arfid...#again. i wanna reiterate that if expanding your diet n being adventureus is your goal that's completely fine#just do NOT fucking project that onto me and spew shit abt how if YOU can do it I can do it#we are separate people with separate brains and lives and circumstances#rant#vent
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solcarow · 1 year ago
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sillays
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wolfsong-the-bloody-beast · 7 months ago
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I've romanced plenty of characters at this point, but Ifan is the only one who's ever shared his snacks with my character. Also, gave her a flower (okay, drugs, it was flower-shaped drugs). And a rare mushroom as a means to poison her enemies. All that completely casually, in a single conversation, without ulterior motives. I'm just saying.
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year ago
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#love that my body decided to incapacitate me the weekend before i have to read 5 different papers for classes#and it would b one thing to just read them but no for 3 of them i have to give detailed interpretation and 1 i have to present on#ive already failed to read one bc i forgot we had to do 2 papers for monday. oops. not that i could have done it anyway. i barely got 1 done#and im on track to fucking up the one due Tomorrow as well#im just fucking tired of reading fucking chemistry driven papers that i dont understand no matter how many times i read them#and everyones like oh itll get easier but no it fucking wont bc i cant fucking read right#its so fucking frustrating. why do i even bother? im so tried#i don't even have the paper im supposed to present on so ill have to do it all tomorrow. cool. great. not that i could do it today anyway#im just. this is gonna b a difficult week#and i misused my whole day by doing extractions bc i scheduled my training a week ago when i thought i would b fine over the weekend#nope. its fucking bullshit. this is y im like. y do i even want to b in academia?#how could i b a prof if i cant read well? its fine to b dyslexic as a math person but im like i have to read so much and so little gets thru#but then what the fuck else am i supposed to do? idk. im just gonna write down something for all these questions and go tf to sleep#ill get up at some horrible time in the morning to finish this. damn the consequences. ill see my therapist tomorrow anyway#and meet with my advisor like 🤪 yo guess what i made zero progress this week#sorry u got stuck with me while im going thru a year of fucking health problems#but whatever cant get rid of me now im already here. here and tired and i wanna go to bed#unrelated
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dog-girl-zezora · 2 months ago
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#if i go back home id have excuses to fuck myself up in ways i havent in a really long time#i feel like im going backwards in progress despite reaching a few goals#i still have to try and to do better and to be better.#... man i just want to drink myself into a pit and cry about it all.#i cant even say theres no hope. that lifes not worth living.#because u have hope. i am living a life worth living. and im terrified to let it go.#ive never really felt this before. i cry but its not out of defeat. its out of fear.#... theres so much fear now. but it fuels me. im not defeated yet.#i have to try.#... and then we can worry about the suicidal ideational side of it all later. its not worth mentioning right now.#the only thing i really wanna cry about is how little i am. how clumsy. how faulty. how useless.#... hope im still good to keep around. im just ignoring the voices telling me everyones better off without me#cause i dont care about that. i want to be kept around regardless of being this.#i want to keep this.#i want to be desired as a useless failgirl.#im trying every day of my life and yet i make zero progress on those fronts.#i still mess up something .. and i still lack validation#... i do eish i was born someone else now. someone better than me atleast. this is a mirror to 16 yr old me.#how things loop around constantly. its annoying.#and i guess i dont learn. or i leep relearning for some goddamn reason.#... this is the curse of my life perhaps.#... i dont know what im on about.
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kiss2012 · 9 months ago
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ummmmm ok.
#911 lb#the henren and maddie storylines were great#i really loved the henren one genuinely#and i love that buck showed up for 5 minutes did that tackle burned lasagna and noticed eddie’s cologne like truly buck girls stand up!!#bobby’s storyline also promises to be rlly good i like amir i hope they don’t villainize him or anything#im thinking back to like end of s2 and when they had that boy bobby indirectly hurt and mostly he was just shown as the bad guy and he#kind of was obviously but im hoping for some more nuance with amir#because thinking about 2x18 with buck (basically bobby’s son) getting hurt by the son of someone who bobby and athena indirectly harmed#that was a rlly good storyline and one of the best season finales they had imo#so i wanna see where they go with this now#and eddie. well like. i’ll reserve my opinions until next week i guess#i do love shannon. genuinely shannon was one of my faves she’s one of the most complex and interesting characters the show has ever done#and i love her and eddie’s relationship i always will#but a doppleganger is soooo soap opera-y 😭 im trying hard to take it serious on one hand it’s like wow this is kind of horrifying and#fascinatingly messy and interesting#and on the other it’s a bit ridiculous#also it’s difficult to see eddie’s progress from his (good) s5 arc….just put aside??#he might not have dealt with shannon but was he rlly at This Point u know…#i really can’t excuse the marisol of it all tho it makes zero sense to have her around for this just to be cheated on like…why the nun#thing and now no mention of that so what was it all for…#there’s sm going on rn….#anyways im returning to my s2 (beloved) rewatch
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kindacreepy-kindaugly · 10 months ago
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I mean I'm not goin back to him I'm not(!!!) but at this point I got no idea why
Literally just screaming into the fucking void
He already broke me to the point where all the shit he's said are my only core beliefs n even if I try to shut down the voice in my head repeatin it all I still believe every damn word
So no matter how long I cut him off for it's always there just the same. But no one else can always be there to make it go away. W/ him I at least go from a total waste of oxygen to the one thing I'll ever be any good for. It's an upgrade I can almost live with.
So what's the point? What do I or anyone gain from me stayin away?
I've been tryin so fucking hard n it's just not getting any easier. I don't know where to put all this fucking self loathing, I can't keep pouring it onto other people. I always need to keep so damn much inside n some of it still spills out n that's already bordering on too much. I don't wanna be a burden. I know everyone is, to some extent, but not like this. Not all the time. Plus they have something to give in return, I only have things no one else wants, just Val's happy to take em if offered.
I still feel the pull all the fucking time. It's like the chain he used to have around my neck but I know he's not doin the pulling, he doesn't care if he has me or not anymore. It's all me now. I'm the one who keeps wanting to go back. The rational part of me is screaming no cause I know he'll just hurt me n find new ways to cut even deeper but. What's left that he hasn't already done?
Maybe this time he'll make the feelings n the noise go away. Maybe this time he'll make it all quiet.
#i know i can't expect anyone else to save me that's something i'm supposed to do myself but#what if i can't? i don't know how to#best i've managed is a somewhat stable daily life but that relies on practically zero triggers n i don't actually get anything done ever#there's no progress. none. it's just me drowning out the noise w/ distractions n booze#everyone i see struggling w/ this shit that's made actual progress has made it w/ the type of healing experiences i can't seem to find#n cause it's all just pseudomemories n shit we can't really even unpack it in therapy cause it doesn't rly get to the real causes#it's always just 'have you had experiences in real life where someone made you feel like this?'#i don't know!! we don't have our actual trauma memories!!!#i just. i wish i didn't need so goddamn much more than what's reasonable to ask of anyone.#i wish i wasn't wired so completely fucking wrong i can't have those needs met#i wish i wasn't so fucking worthless. only ever barely keepin my head above water.#i tried to list any skills/positive traits/things i like about myself n the only thing i could come up w/ is i give great head#n i guess the way i'll let you act out any fucked up fantasy on me if you don't mind that i cry or dissociate#but i don't have anythin else to give. my body's all i have to offer n it's not even a very good one anymore#i still wish someone would use it. make me feel like i still have a use. give me some way to make up for even fucking existing#i guess i was doin some good back when i still let val take all his aggressions out on me so he had an outlet aside from doll#i'd be ok w/ him just usin me but he's always so fucking cruel about it.#i really really really wanna cut but he'd be so fucking angry i'm scared of what he'd do#i just. can't someone just fucking use me. do whatever you want to my body n tell me i'm not a waste of space cause i make you feel good#tell me i'm a good boy#spdrvent
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tan1shere · 10 days ago
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Freak
Billie Eilish x female reader !
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A/n: Oh hey ! It's tan. You know, the one who can't stick to one fucking story and never ends up finishing them anyways (I have 32 fucking drafts.) N E WAYS. I thought of this, yes another doja song. What can I say, she serves, ENJOY
Summary: you're both just as freaky.
Warnings: smut, car sex, use of daddy, riding, lowkey highkey fb billie - if there's anything else I haven't mentioned pls lmk !
Tags: @trulyy-yourzz @eilishslut @chrissv4mp @n0vabug @dollyvuu @dollarbils @sweetcherriexs @xxangelfarrlzxx
^comment if you want to be added^
Masterlist
Parties like these were the best, dressing up as someone unrecognizable. This theme was roaring 20s for your friends 20th. Music was fitting to the time of this era. People dressed in specific outfits. Women in the iconic dresses, men in the vest, suit. Some wearing the iconic hat. But there was one female who dressed axactly like that. "Well well. Y/n." She says with a smirk. "Billie, always one to stand out huh?" She chuckles. "Why not, kinda pisses guys off and turns women on. Win win." You look at her full outfit. It honestly was turning you on. "What women?" Her brows raise. "Plenty. Heaps." You had zero clue why but that rubbed you up the wrong way. You knew she's been out with heaps of girls.
But it just got to you. Maybe cause you haven't had a piece yet. That'll change tonight, you plan to do so. You and billie always had chemistry. Having near incidents of kissing, sometimes more. But something always happens to get in the way. You were honestly drawn to her and little did you know she was drawn to you too. "Come here alone?" You shrug at her question. "Might have. You?" She thinks for a moment. "Possibly." The tension was thick, and God you just wanted to kiss her. But you keep your cool. Thinking of some form of a plan. You notice girls looking at her. "Damn, maybe you weren't kidding." She laughs again. "Do I kid, darling?" Even her mannerisms were fitting for the theme. Was it on purpose?
"Well, maybe you should go mingle." You go to turn around but she grabs your wrist. "Hey now, what if I want to talk to you." Progress. You smile. "You do? Really?" You ask so innocently. Then she comes out with something that shocks you. "Yeah. Maybe tonight there won't be interruptions like usual." Now you were stumped. So she was known to the coincidence too. She cared... "Maybe you're right." You subtly bite your lip. "Why don't we get a head start and get out of here." Your smile returns. "Sounds like a plan."
The car ride was antagonizing. But once she'd gotten to your place it was go time. So much feeling was brewing inside the both of you. And as you reach the door, followed by your room you waste no time. Your hands reach for the hat, chucking it somewhere. Her hands move to your body, letting out a content sigh like she's finally reached her life long goal. She definitely had. Her lips go straight to your own and you practically do the same sound as she did moments ago, except it came out as a moan. She had zero idea what she was getting into with you, but you had always wanted to try this with someone. But you had zero idea how she'd react. Good thing you'd enjoy it. You had moved her on the bed, watching as she sat on her elbows.
You knew Billie was dominant with the stories she told. But she had no. Idea. Just how freaky you could be. If anything she'd have more fun with this. You go to your closet pulling out some rope casually. Her left brow raises. "What you plan on doing with that?" You say nothing, moving over her. Her hand reaches for your jaw as you sutuate the restraint. "Huh?" Your shoulders shrug. "You'll see." She was about to protest but in a blink of an eye you were already doing it. Pushing her back and tying her to the bed. "Really?" She says as you giggle. "You're a fucking menace." You shrug. "Guess you didn't know how I'd be. Did you?" She looks in your eyes. "Untie me." You contemplate. She looked a little mad. Bingo. Just what you wanted. "Mmm no, Im just getting started Bils." Your hands move to somehow get some of her clothes off.
But with the way she acted before you got a brilliant idea that popped into your head. You go for your own clothing, taking of the head piece. The gloves, your dress. Slowly you did so. Very slowly, you didn't have a bra on so she was unexpectedly blessed by the sight. "Oh God." She lets out. Seeing as all she could do was use her mouth. Use her mouth... Now she, had a brilliant idea. Seeing as you weren't going to budge anytime soon. "Come closer for me." You look at her. "Why should I." "These aren't tight enough. I'd hate to just slip out." Your slow brain doesn't process right away as you lean over. Tits right in her face. Boom. "But you didn't want to escape earlier-" You say, as you tie them tighter. Stopping with realization.
You go to move but suddenly feeling a wet pair of lips on your bud. It hardening on her tongue. You mentally stop, soon after, you move again. "You tricked me." She smirks. "Like it was hard." Oops. "No, come on. Just Untie me. Cone on baby I know you want to." The name had you considering it. But you weren't done. "Nope." This only made her rage heighten. "You're a fucking brat you know that?" She didn't even say that sexually, she was just annoyed. But you loved it. You shift slightly as the words pass her lips. Then she spots it, spots why you were doing this. So she tries again. "Want to get me all riled up huh? You like being a slut." You tried to ignore it. "Go on then, keep going and you'll find out how it ends." You still had some form of confidence. Your lips move to her neck, letting your breasts rest on her chest.
This was driving her nuts. You were so caught up in giving her a hickey, you had no clue she'd escaped. "We could flip the coin." Your brows furrow when she says that. But you knew things were fucked as soon as you felt soft hands on your naked waist. "Uh oh." She smirks maliciously. Flipping you guys so you were underneath. "Yeah, uh oh's right babe. Big fat, fucking. Uh oh." You've never seen her like this. You thought the girls she's been with were exaggerating. Definitely not the case. Your eyes go wide. "How'd you-" She tuts. "So silly. Im surprised you'd try me." A split of confidence shines through. "Yeah it was fun." She laughs. And it immediately compels you. "Cute. Very cute. You won't be saying that soon babygirl. I can promise you that." You just give into her, you're desire won over. "I'll be your slave."
Her head tilts. "That's much better. More so than earlier right?" Your breath increases as her hand slowly slides down to your underwear. "Now shut the fuck up, and let me do my thing yeah?"
Your eyes shut. "Yes daddy."
"Good girl."
I ain't afraid of a little pain.
Weeks pass from that unforgettable night. And let's just say, you and Billie had been seeing eachother on the down low, constantly. Her past flings or whatever they even were would call her. Text her. And she couldn't give a rats ass anymore. Ignoring every single one of them. You infiltrated her brain entirely. Once she had a taste she never wanted to go back. But aside from the sexual, she had asked you to go out tonight. Which you had no idea wasn't the norm for her. She was definitely swoon. She honked her horn letting you know she was here. You scurry out seeing her standing by your side. Already open for you to get in. "Wow." Was all she said. "Could say the exact thing about you." You say hopping in. She was bewildered. I mean sure she's seen you dressed up. But not like this.
The night went on, it was beautiful and peaceful. She was the sweetest, conversation was filled with laughter and meaning. When you two go to leave, heading to the car. Something shifts. All of a sudden conversation was dead. Maybe it was her hand on your thigh as she drove. Her rings clod on your skin. The chunky metal clunking together as she moves her fingers around subconsciously. Her eyes were on the road but her mind was most definitely on you. Her fingers move upwards, under your tight skirt. The pad of her index touches your lacy underwear. Her teeth grabs her bottom lip, hearing you suck in a breath. She dips her finger past the fabric, touching you. Already soaked just from the tiny action. "Fuck." She says under her breath.
Her other hand still on the wheel. She swerves into an empty parking lot swiftly. The act, oddly attractive. She moves her hand out, grabbing your waist, getting you to sit on her lap. "Couldn't wait till we got back?" You pout mockingly at her. "Oh shut up, you have no clue." You grab her face. "Then tell me." You look into her eyes so sweetly. "Fucking hell." She groans, ignoring you and immediately kissing your lips. You sink into the feeling. Molding perfectly. "Need this. Now." She breathes against your lips. You just nod in reply, getting needier. She fiddles with her belt, getting the strap out. It was red, it matched your skirt. How on earth? How'd she even know- But as you were wondering you didn't even realize your skirt was bunched and underwear to the side.
You realize when the tip prods you. "Bils." You gasp, feeling it suddenly go in. Your body rising off of her, slowly sinking down. And the moan you let out almost makes her finish on the spot. "Jesus." She moans. You ride her, but painfully slow. Hearing a sound of annoyance coming from her. You smirk, slowing down more. "God you're a little bitch." Her hands grip your waist forcefully pushing you down all the way. You whimper. You moan, so caught off guard. "That fixed you huh." Your eyes shut at the feeling, feeling full of her. "Billie-" You gasp yet again, shocked at how good this specific one felt. "Chose bigger. Just, for. You." She truly was down bad. She continues her movements, hitting spots you've never felt such pleasure from before. "Daddy I want it faster." You moan into her neck as you had just moved it there. Breathing heavily.
Her hands speed up with ease, loving how your own hips would move on her. "Fuck you're so good. Might make me cum before you do." You chuckle into her skin, moving so you're facing her again. "Them bitches you fuckin with, I know they gon need some practice." She hums. "Nobody does it like you baby." Both of your lips connect again in a heated kiss, more heated than all the other ones you shared. There was something firey about tonight. Her hand moves to grab your shirt, lifting it. "Actually get to suck these without you being a pain." You giggle. "Oh come on, I know you love it." She doesn't say a word, moving her lips to the bud. Your moans high pitched. Her other hand moves to push the seat back. Having her lay down, your own hips take control as your hands move to her shoulders.
Got me like, "Yeehaw," ride it like a horsey.
Kinda like see-saw, up and down on the D.
Her lips still sucking with intense need. Your head starts to spin as your argasm encroached. Moaning incessantly. She felt like she was in heaven, she could definitely die happy. Especially with your tits in her mouth. "Im so close Billie." You sigh out, feeling your movements getting sloppier. Her mouth retracts, moving her hands to your hips once again. Speeding you up. "Mmm, so am I." She bites her lip at the way you felt on her. She could feel your walls tighten as it get harder for her to move your body. "F-fuck!" You squeak, hadn't expected it to come out as fast as it did. The way she moved you, sends your legs to shake. Her finishing soon after, watching your face intently. Your eyes roll back.
After awhile you eventually catch your breaths. Calming down. "I had no idea you were this freaky. Pegged you to be more of the shy type." You smile as you lay on her. "Ain't ever been vanilla, honey, just wait until you get a taste." - "Think I already have." You sit up straight going close to her face. "You haven't tasted me yet though." She smirks at you. "Maybe I should do that. Right. Now."
;)
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quarterlifekitty · 2 months ago
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pookie, guess who’s back in your inbox🎀✨
do you have any weakness post thoughts on a reader with a sore chest? like, as a period symptom or just in general sometimes (woe, the back pain too)? hugs and kisses, hope you have a tasty treat or snack, mwah
Anything for you boo boo
So, the original thesis of the weaknesses series was that it would be about what they’re weak to! This doesn’t exactly fit, so I’m just gonna have it as a separate thing!!
Gaz- we’ve spoken of this man’s affinity for massages. You know what this sounds like? A problem that could be solved with a massage. Brother is pulling out his oils as we speak. Lay down, babe, your man can handle this. And my god does he handle it.
Soap is also going to offer the massage route. Do not believe him. He, himself, thinks that his offer is a genuine one, but the most dangerous lies are the ones the speaker themself believes. What I mean is that he’s going to get distracted and hard after having his hands are on your tits and the progress will be basically net zero.
Ghost is a chronic pain man in my heart. And he’s tried everything. So if you have any pain whatsoever he’s revealing to you that the entire cabinet beneath the bathroom sink is entirely pain treatment shit. Lotions, ointments, painkillers, compression gear, hot and cold packs, herbal medicine, fucking crystals— he’s got it. And now this empire is yours as well!
Price is doing what you expect. Offering massages, offering to go to the store and pick out your favorite treats for you, he’ll hang out with you while you lay down. But don’t be fooled. He is 100% thinking about what it’s gonna be like when you’re pregnant. This is his practice run.
König is thinking of what to say to you and how to say it for like ten minutes of complete silence. “I could, you know— hold them. For you.” Not this man with his big fucking hands offering to be your bra!! And yes. He is going to treat your tits like stress toys— inadvertently giving you a massage and helping.
Nikolai is also gonna be your bra, but with about 1000 times more restraint. He’s just going to hold you. Give you support. Let you feel his chest compress and relax as you lay against him. He’s also gonna be giving you types of ibuprofen that aren’t even legal in some countries.
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tarysande · 4 months ago
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The best part about coming back to the source material after a looooong time is you sorta get a fresh look at canon in comparison to whatever the dominant strains of fanon have become. Or, in fact, whatever your own dominant strains of headcanon have become.
I mean, yes, Garrus “I’m not a good turian” Vakarian gets infinitely cooler (and more competent!) by pretty much every metric as the storyline progresses. He does. But fresh out of ME1 and into ME2 through his recruitment, I find myself genuinely amused by how thin the veneer of badass is over a pretty dominant core of straight-up nerd sprinkled with idealism mixed with self-doubt.
When you have Garrus in the squad all the time (and thus get all his ambient dialogue and remarks), you really pick up on the number of times he calls out bad behavior, unethical actions, cruelty, and rule-breaking, especially in ME1.
He’s not actually a hothead who can’t abide rules of any kind. In fact, most of the time he’s pretty pro-law-and-order, and he gets amusingly hall-monitorish when people are breaking rules he considers important and worth following.
Fundamentally, Garrus chafes when his sense of what is just is at odds with what the authorities do about that injustice (or what they stop him from doing). And I would hazard a guess that the reason his actions seem so intense or harsh or "of course we should have shot down that ship in the middle of the Citadel" is indicative not of his impatience but of the degree to which he thinks the authorities have failed to uphold that justice. We know he can be patient. He's a sniper. His whole modus operandi on Omega is precision kills without civilian casualty. But when that long fuse finally burns down, he goes from zero to shooting down ships in the middle of the Citadel in what looks (from the outside) like a heartbeat.
And yes, injured pride hastens the burning of that fuse; he doesn’t like losing. Or admitting defeat. Or failing.
Having just replayed his recruitment mission, a few things really stood out to me this time.
The merc bands really hate him--and they also reluctantly admire him (he's described as smart, resourceful, dangerous, idealistic, brave, slippery; they all agree they only way they managed to get this far is by isolating him and employing dirty tactics). I mean, there's literally a station-wide announcement that Omega can return to "business as usual" once Archangel is out of the picture because he was disrupting things so completely.
The way Garrus blames himself for the deaths of his squad is so freaking turian. Failure reflects on the leader who places his people in danger they can't handle, not the individual who fails. Heavy is the head that wears the crown. Yes, Sidonis betrayed him, but the person Garrus blames the most? Is himself. For trusting Sidonis in the first place. For raising Sidonis to a position where he had the means and opportunity to harm others--and the weakness of character to turn coat, to save his own hide, instead of dying to protect the others.
Garrus mentions more than once that he was trying to emulate Shepard. And his tone always implies that he knows he failed because Shepard would never have let a Sidonis into the fold. Again, he's blaming himself. Like a good turian. Yes, he wanted to avoid the red tape and bureaucracy of C-Sec, but his code--Archangel's code--certainly aligns with Paragon Shepard's morality (with a Garrus Vakarian twist).
And since it wouldn't be meta without adding a Tara's Headcanon Twist ... I've always wondered why "Archangel" when it's such a ... human concept. But this time, when I noticed how he spoke about Shepard's influence, and how quickly he brushes aside the name when she asks him about it, I wondered if it wasn't actually his way of honoring the mythology of the dead woman whose example he was trying to follow. Not that Shepard is a God he's worshiping, but ... there is something about the way he talks about her. Garrus doesn't make himself over in the image of a God, though; he's the soldier, the right hand, the avenging angel responsible for carrying out divine punishments suited and proportional to the crimes committed, the rules broken, the selfishness or cruelty of the perpetrator.
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qqueenofhades · 8 months ago
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There is no law that prevents a convicted felon from running for and becoming president, nor a law that bans someone from being president in prison. Also, if Trump gets incapacitated in someway, many ultra right republicans who equally despise trans people and immigrants and Muslims would happily take his place
And I ask, with all due respect, what is your point?
Do you think I don't know that?
Do you think I am somehow convinced that everything is hunky dory now and we don't have any work left to do?
Are you just determined to be the first of the gloom-and-doomers who show up like clockwork in my inbox, every time some consequence happens to Trump, to morosely insist that no consequences will happen to him? First it was "he'll win re-election." Then it was "the coup will succeed." Then it was "he will never be indicted." Then it was "2022 will be a red wave!" Then it was "he will never be tried." Then it was "he will never be convicted." Now we've moved on, within less than 2 hours of the first US President ever to be convicted of ONE felony, let alone THIRTY-FOUR, "he'll never be sentenced or face a real consequence or lose the election." The goalposts keep moving RIGHT along without even a single pause to acknowledge the difficulty and the value of the progress we have made thus far, and it makes me CRAZY.
Do you people realize how fucking rare it is, both in the world today and historically, for a former (and would-be future) head of state to be held to criminal account by a jury of 12 anonymous ordinary citizens? When that one person, Trump, is the center of the malignant fascist cancer that has spread through this country ever since 2016, and plenty of his cultists are still insisting that it's Trump or nobody for them? When we've actually reached the stage of holding him legally accountable for (some of) his crimes for the first time in his miserable misbegotten life? I suspect that most of you are so deep in the "America is totally broken and the system is useless and we can only Revolute!!!1" rabbit hole that you're bound and determined to argue away every step we take, however slow, as Meaning Nothing TM. Voting? Fake. Fighting to make real progress? Also fake. Everything is fake except our belief that everything is broken and we need the Keyboard Warrior Glorious Revolution!!! As long as you can keep inventing ever more contorted twists of logic to ignore everything else that's happened so far, this makes sense... or something. I guess?
Now we're onto "removing Trump won't matter :(" when a whole lot of people have been fighting day and fucking night to get all the privileged-princess Online Leftists to get off their Che Guevara cosplaying asses and cast a single fucking vote to keep us from full-on-sliding into fascism. A slide into fascism that, again, has been spearheaded and centered around Trump's toxic cult of personality and which is still tied to him in almost every way. Apparently holding him to account (again, which has never happened to him in his life) already doesn't matter because wah wah he won't suffer any consequences. If he loses this election he's probably going to jail for the rest of his life! We would have electorally defeated the greatest threat to the American democratic experiment in 250 years, and frankly a huge part of the fascist far-right hydra that is currently attempting a comeback around the world! This is, yet again:
THE FIRST TIME ANY AMERICAN PRESIDENT, EVER, HAS BEEN CONVICTED OF MULTIPLE FELONY CHARGES IN A COURT OF LAW BY A JURY OF HIS PEERS
and yet we're still hearing that nothing matters and no work has been done and removing him will have no effect???
Come on. Come on. I know it's tiring and it's slow and it doesn't go as fast as we want. But every single damn time the process goes another step, here you people are in my inbox insisting that we're still at zero progress and it means nothing, and lemme tell you, I am Tired of it. Come on. You don't have to jump up and down (my own feeling is glee and vindication but still not relaxation, I will not relax until he loses the fucking election and goes to jail), but you also don't need to keep myopically pretending that all the effort thus far by so many people means nothing. Come on.
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notaplaceofhonour · 6 months ago
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the people in the replies to oop, being weird about it
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The replies:
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Remember everyone: everyone on earth can be neatly sorted into the two stances of "agrees with everyone I say exactly in the way I'd say it" and "horrible person who MUST support BAD THINGS" even if what they're talking about has nothing to with what I'm accusing them of!
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People speedrunning hating the West with clickbait bullshit like this. Meanwhile I wonder how many died in the Uhigur Camps and during the Zero Covid Policy that China LIED about how many people died. And even if this is clickbait, it pushes that same narrative. Because most people ONLY read headlines.
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China is not "Objectively" better than the US. Better at killing their own people sure, but I guess from their perspective they are better because they have less, what was it that guy said to me? Oh yeah, "China is better country because we have less whores and gays. No naked people in streets dancing around. US is disgusting and we don't have the problem you have".
Yeah no see. His english was not the best but the sentiment is funny considering how many progressives would be pissed at the message while literally DICK RIDING the country. Ya know, that uses actual slave labor, has women in camps and rapes them because they were born wrong, and kills its own citizens on a whim. Truely a bastion of freedom and acceptance.
And more to the point. Even with the content of this video, I disagree with this thumbnail. It paints the wrong image. And many people will see it, nod along with the message and keep scrolling. Most of the only people that will click it is those that disagree with the message. Not those that agree.
But for the sake of brevity here's the video
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thyfleshc0nsumed · 5 months ago
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hey crazy question, since you said there is no evil what would you call hitler evil? trump? mussolini? genghis khan? jeffrey dahmer? jeffrey epstein? KKK members? IDF? and if they're evil then i guess you're telling me child rapists are the only ones that shouldn't be called evil? why is that?
I'm gonna ignore your bad faith misreading of my ideas and your attempt to insinuate I am a child abuser and answer your first question for other ppls sake, cuz I think it is a reasonable thing ppl might be grappling with.
In a word, no.
In a few more words, I think the question fails to properly interrogate what I mean when I refer to evil. 'Evil' is a component of a moral framework, and I feel that moral frameworks are by and large shallow and not very useful in furthering for understandings of the world around us, or very conducive to creating material change, from an individual scale to a societal scale.
The central idea I put forward in that post is that it is not some grand moral badness that enables violence and abuse, but rather systems of power. All of your examples speak to this. You mention the wealthy, political leaders, a state backed by a global superpower, and a group that was comprised of people with systemic power over their victims.
Viewing them merely as "evil" is frankly uncurious and in some ways, cyclical and thought terminating. It begs the question: "they're bad because they're bad because they're bad."
We have NO disagreement in the fact that what those people do or did have produced violence and harm, many on a scale which is difficult to fully comprehend the magnitude of. It is equally difficult to understand even how one could act with such cruelty towards fellow human beings. But just because it is difficult to understand does not mean it is impossible. They didn't do those things because they were born with some kind of evil gene or soul.
They, like you and I, were created by the context of the world around them. If Adolf Hitler died as a child, would Germany have been rid of its antisemitism or have lost its imperial ambitions? Would war have been averted? Certainly not. There were specific, relatively measurable conditions which allowed fascism to flower. If not him, someone else would have helmed that movement.
If Adolf Hitler were born in another place and time, he would not be Adolf Hitler in any meaningful sense. A person is more or less a sum of their environment. People cannot exist outside the context that they do in fact exist in.
And so to then declare someone as 'evil' amounts to saying just about nothing. It's zero sum. If people do harm simply because they are evil, then what can be done? Create a list of them and then systematically exterminate them?
Many people have twisted my words and claimed that what I am saying is that we should expose our bellies and allow bigots to gut us, or that I equivocate violence against oppressors and violence against the oppressed. This is categorically untrue. When violence is brought against you, violent response can be prudent.
But what happens after the relations of power have been altered? When the abuser or oppressor no longer has the power to harm you? Is there reason to harm them besides to punish or sate a desire for revenge? If they no longer have the means to do 'evil,' then what purpose does violence against them serve besides for the sake of our own bloodlust?
You will not see me shed a tear for Israeli settlers killed by opposition forces, or for abusers killed by a victim defending themself because those relations of power are still in place. Settlers can leave, soldiers can dodge the draft, and abusers can stop abusing.
But if they settle, kill, and abuse because they are 'evil,' then what choice did they have to begin with? And what can be done to stop colonialism, state violence, and abuse in the future? Are evil people just going to stop being born?
The framework of evil adds nothing, gives no solutions, and hinders progress by giving us amnesty for not looking at our own relationship to power structures. But a materialist, analytical framework provides us tools to deconstruct those structures and hopefully move beyond them.
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goreandbunnies · 2 months ago
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⛧☾༒︎ 𝔇𝔢𝔳𝔬𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫 ༒︎☽⛧
Sukuna x Reader, Toji x Reader
Summary ๋࣭ ⭑⚝"Almost six months after meeting him, I had finally managed to escape. At least that's what I thought, hidden in that alley, holding my breath and waiting for the search party to get further away from my spot. But this city was his, he had eyes everywhere. I needed to leave as far away as I could."
Warnings ๋࣭ ⭑⚝ Explicit language, sexual explicit scenes, sexual assault, drugs and alcohol, explicit violent scenes, gun violence, emotional and physical manipulation, dub-con, mentions of cults, blood and blood play, knife play.
Word count ๋࣭ ⭑⚝ 10.5k (in progress)
Dividers by @animatedglittergraphics-n-more & @cafekitsune
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𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 1
Six months earlier 1.
The music was blasting through the club’s speakers as our group got inside, my friend Amy leading us all to the VIP booth she had reserved for us.
She had booked half of the fanciest, high end club in town to throw the most indecent bachelorette party humanity had ever witnessed. I didn’t know where to watch - the entire place was either shining or sparkling. Chrome, black and white all over the walls and floors, where the lights reflected on the mass of sweaty bodies dancing around us. The very long and exclusive waiting list to get in made the few people allowed in there feel privileged. Blessed.
“I can’t believe you managed to book that club, Amy,” another friend of ours gasped as she looked around as well.
“Ben is friends with the owner, when we said we wanted to plan both parties here, he offered to book it for us,” Amy replied, filled with pride. I smiled at her.
Amy had been my best friend since high school - she and I were polar opposites but somehow ended up inseparable. She was tiny, blonde, a social bee, always chatting with new people and making friends whereas I liked the quiet and the comfort of my inner circle.
I readjusted the pink “maid of honor” sash on my tight red dress and watched as Ben - the future groom - and his party arrived. They had decided to do a joint party to enjoy the lush club and I knew Amy wanted to keep an eye on Ben to make sure his cavemen friends wouldn’t hire a stripper for him.
“Hey there,” a voice said behind me, hands grazing my arms. I shivered and took a step away.
“Hey,” I gave Brad - Ben’s best friend and best man - a polite smile but took another step away from him just to be sure.
Brad and the rest of the party were in high school with us. We all grew up together. He used to bully me for being too tall, standing out in any girl group, only to hit on me constantly now that we were both adults. Except I had zero interest in the preppy looking guy in the slightest. Whenever he was around me, all I wanted was to run away.
“Looking good tonight, want me to get you something to drink?” He stepped forward to basically scream in my ear over the music. I placed a couple of fingers on his chest and kept him away.
“I’m not drinking anything you bring me,” I smiled again, this time struggling to stay polite.
“After all these years, really?” He laughed, as if it had been a fucking joke to him. “It was one time and you had so much fun,” he said as he sat heavily on the black cushioned seats.
“You fucking roofied me and I almost drowned in the pool at that frat party,” I spat at him angrily.
“Water under the bridge, baby. It’s in the past, you should move on,” he laid his arms out on the back of the seat as Ben and the rest of the guys sat next to him.
Sick of him ruining the night for me, I gave him the middle finger before heading for the VIP section of the bar where Amy was ordering shots for us girls. I dropped on a stool and sighed.
“Lemme guess, Brad?” Amy asked as she collected the shots and placed them on a tray. I nodded.
“I don’t know why Ben is still friends with that asshole,” she shook her blonde head, her curls bouncing around. “I mean everyone knows what he did and no one bats an eye cause his father is loaded,” she rolled her eyes before placing a shot in front of me and taking one for her.
Amy was the one who had driven me to the police station to press charges against Brad. She yelled at each and every officer until one sat down to take my statement. But one flick of Brad’s father's checkbook and the file disappeared into oblivion.
“As long as he doesn’t come near me, I can tolerate his presence,” I said before clinking my glass with hers and downing the shot in one gulp. Amy hummed in pleasure as she looked around before turning back to me.
“Don’t look but there’s a guy who’s totally checking you out over there,” she discreetly nodded over her shoulder. I chuckled.
“How can you tell, maybe he’s checking you out,” I made sure not to look as ordered but curiosity was getting the best of me.
“Cause of this,” she pointed at her plastic tiara with a veil, her short black dress and her “future bride” sash. She turned around again to peek and I followed her gaze to a gigantic, scary looking guy.
That man looked like every single red flag packed into a pile of muscles, bodyguard type, with a burning stare and a vertical scar on the side of his mouth. He seemed to be a couple of years older than us, early thirties, but he had nothing in common with the guys sitting a few feet away. He was violence incarnate and even from afar, standing still, arms crossed over his large chest, I could feel the anger coming off him in waves.
Amy was right, it wasn’t her he was staring at, but me. Quite openly. His stare lingered on me for a while, taking in the length of my bare legs up to the red dress I was wearing, the tattoos on my arms - my damn boobs and eventually, his eyes locked with mine. I raised an eyebrow before returning the favor and eyeing him down.
The black t-shirt he was wearing didn’t leave much room to imagination - his arms were the size of both my legs together and his chest seemed to have been molded in pure iron. When I looked at his lower body, I wasn’t surprised to find that his legs matched his arms - the thickest thighs known to man wrapped in tight black suit pants.
My eyes ran up to his broad shoulders, thick neck then up to his face, eyes dark partially hidden by slick dark hair falling in front of them. He sure did look scary, yet I couldn’t help but think he looked beautiful. The rage that vibrated off him was intoxicating.
Somehow, I got the feeling that he felt out of place, like a fish out of the water down here with the mass of bodies and loud music. The permanent frown on his face was pretty clear - he wasn’t happy to be here and he was not to be fucked with.
“Damn he looks scary,” Amy raised her eyebrows at me before a new song played, causing her to shriek like a banshee. “That’s my song! Let’s get on the dancefloor, where are the girls?”
She took my hand and dragged me away, not before I managed to give the stranger a small smile and for a second, I swore I saw the scarred corner of his lip rise.
Copyright © goreandbunnies, bitchcraft18 2024, all rights reserved, do not repost, use or plagiarize. Do not translate.
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Taglist ♥ @sweetlandspos @tojislittleprincesss @paradisestarfishh @unheavenlypacked
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thehanalia · 11 months ago
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The Subtle Art of Becoming "That Girl" in 2024 🌸✨
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Hello beautiful souls! It's me, Hana. If you are new reader then
Hi! I’m Hanalia and I want to empower women to prioritize their well-being while pursuing their dreams🌟
Today, I woke up feeling extra inspired by the #thatgirl aesthetic. You know her – she's the girl who embodies self-love, radiates positivity, and just seems to have her life beautifully organized. Personally, I believe, she's not just a trend; she's a movement towards becoming the best version of ourselves. And guess what? Becoming "that girl" isn't about perfection; it's about progress. It's about embracing the journey of self-improvement, self-care, and love. So, let's dive into a few ways you can bring a little bit of "that girl" magic into your everyday life:
1. Morning Rituals ✨
Start your day with purpose. Whether it's a morning skincare routine, meditation, or writing down your thoughts in a daily planner, find what centers you. If you have been following me for a while then you know how important this is. Remember, it's these small rituals that set the tone for a productive, positive day.
2. Self-Care Sundays 🛁
Dedicate time each week to pamper yourself. This could be a long bath, a skincare routine, or even a cozy evening with a book. It's all about showing yourself some love and appreciation.
I remember back in my childhood my older sister used to always have pamper sundays and I would always try and follow her footsteps however, back then your girl was as lazy as one can be...so zero exceptions. Be better than me girls and make the future you be proud.
3. Clean Girl Aesthetic 🌿
Embrace the clean girl aesthetic with a minimalist wardrobe, clean makeup looks, and a tidy space. A clutter-free environment not only looks good but also brings a sense of calm and order to your mind. Clean home = clean mind + remember clean body
4. Find Your Fitness Love 💕
Whether it's pink pilates, yoga, or a brisk walk in the park, find a physical activity that you love. It's not just about the physical benefits but the mental clarity and energy boost it brings.
5. Nourish to Flourish 🍓
Eating well is a form of self-respect. Fill your plate with colors, textures, and nutrients. It's not just about looking good, but feeling good from the inside out.
6. Learn and Grow 🌱
Embrace new hobbies, read more books, and challenge yourself to learn something new often. Growth is a huge part of becoming "that girl".
7. Stay Organized 📒
Invest in a good daily planner to keep track of your goals, appointments, and to-dos. There's something incredibly satisfying about ticking off tasks and staying on top of your game.
And here's a little secret for you: part of my "that girl" journey includes creating pieces that speak to my soul. I stumbled upon this adorable shop aka my Shop [GlowInGrow] that just screams self-care and love. My THAT GIRL planner is something that I did with love and my own hands. For me, it's not just a planner, it's my way of helping others because that's what being her is. Being her means she shares her secrets to help the rest of the girlies. MESSAGE ME FOR THE PROMO CODE *hint*
Also this planner has got you covered from setting your intentions and tracking your habits to planning your meals and self-care routines perfect for anyone looking to add that extra touch of mindfulness and beauty to their daily routine. It's subtle, but oh, so beautiful. 🌟
AND REMEMBER;
Becoming "that girl" isn't an overnight transformation. It's about making small, meaningful changes that align with who you are and who you aspire to be. Let's embrace this journey together, one step at a time. 💕
Last but not least, at the end of your journey of becoming that girl awaits the future who is The Girl!
Stay safe and stay hot...
With Love, Hanalia
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