#and good omens doesn’t ??

[ato-dato]

Go on, burst every one of his bubbles why don’t you

[bone-yarddz]

Audio books but it’s Michael Sheen reading books as Aziraphale and sometimes you hear David Tennant shouting something obnoxious as Crowley.

[galaxyspeaking]

Oh my darling, we’ve been dancing since the start

[dingledraw]

South Downs cottage fluff based on the Dolly Parton song “Berrypie” 🩷

[camilleflyingrotten]

Headcanon

Crowley was a pirate once bc it was fun 🏴‍☠️

[dainesanddaffodils]

Today’s Good Omens posting is about *spins wheel*

how Crowley’s self-loathing colors the way he sees Aziraphale’s interactions with him and how we should take that negative bias into account

I’m not even gonna talk about the whole final scene/misunderstanding because we’ve all talked about that one by now. Instead I want to talk about Crowley’s description of the 3 reasons Aziraphale calls him:

(Paraphrasing) “you’re bored; you need to tell someone about something clever you did; something’s wrong”

this is a succinct breakdown and it lowkey paints Aziraphale in a bad light; Aziraphale only calls Crowley when it’s beneficial to him; this is a transactional relationship

but like, I think, to some degree, those 3 reasons are simply the only reasons Crowley can actually imagine Aziraphale being interested in talking to him. The last one is a common song and dance between them, sure, but what about the first 2?

Aziraphale calling out of the blue, rambling about how things have been slow and quiet in the neighborhood of late and wanting to take that time to catch up - Crowley can’t fathom ‘Aziraphale missed my voice and wanted to make sure I was doing okay’ and turns it into ‘Aziraphale is just bored obviously’

Aziraphale calling, absolutely giddy, talking a mile a minute about something clever he’s done can’t possibly be ‘I’m the first person he wants to share his victories with, the person whose opinion matters the most to him now and always’ so instead it’s ‘Aziraphale just needed someone to tell this to before he popped’

(There’s an interesting thing implied here as well, which is that it’s Aziraphale calling Crowley regularly and yet we talk about how Aziraphale isn’t taking initiative in the relationship but I digress)

Point is, I think Crowley knows that Aziraphale likes him, it’s part of what makes everything so heartbreaking - the way he ends up being rejected in spite of that - but just like I think he misunderstands Aziraphale’s heaven proposal because he can’t see that Aziraphale thinks he is better than heaven already, he misunderstands any reason Aziraphale would possibly reach out to him as some level of wanting something rather than… just wanting to talk to him. He doesn’t recognize that he is Enough for Aziraphale, no strings or acts of service attached.

We just need one amazing kiss conversation to set this straight

[lilpatison]

“…𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘴𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯, 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰.”

“𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝙢𝙚, 𝘈𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘭.”

[feathered-serpents]

Me when season 2 explicitly confirmed Aziraphale and Crowley are in gay love with each other with no room for ambiguity at all

[armageddidnt]

Good Omens dropping hints that Crowley has apparently Forgotten at least some of his former high-and-mighty angelic status in heaven.

[dogsstew]

Look at you, You’re Gorgeous

🪐☄️⭐️💫

[demonir]

I bring you more snail aziracrow, ineffable snails if you will… and yes I’m making this an AU and it’s gonna be named Snail Omens, if you even care

The aftermath of him storming off is quite anticlimactic when he’s a snail and can only crawl away at a… well… snail’s pace

[biceratops7]

I’m gonna SCREAM-

We’ve already established as a fandom that Metatron could teach a masterclass on gas lighting, but I wanna talk about how he specifically validates the things Aziraphale cares for while simultaneously devaluing them under the surface.

First off, this moment?

Tells us everything we need to know. It sets the scene for exactly the games Metatron is playing. He makes Muriel feel important while openly insulting them (flat out calling them stupid), aka seamlessly reinforcing the idea that they’re less than to both them and anyone else in the room. He knows he can get away with this easily, he knows that Muriel, lonely, overlooked little Muriel, will be completely distracted by the fact that someone so important is taking an interest in them.

This is already horribly clever, but then later on you realize it’s doing even MORE heavy lifting when he appoints Muriel to run the bookshop. “See? What’s important to you is what’s important to me! I’ve graciously taken the time to ensure your beloved shop is looked after by Muriel. You know, the dim one!” …let’s suffice it to say he’s ensnared too birds with one net for this one, and that a pattern is already starting to arise.

So when Metatron says Gabriel came to Aziraphale because he’s a “natural leader” and “doesn’t just tell people what they wanna hear”? Yah he’s full of shit. Aziraphale struggles with his sense of purpose when he doesn’t have someone or something guiding him, and for thousands of years he’s been terrified of sharing his true feelings and opinions to 90% of people he’s known. Completely just trying to butter him up. Wanna know the real reason Gabriel seeks asylum with Aziraphale?

Exactly this. Gabriel just says so point blank. It’s not because Aziraphale is this person for him, it’s because despite knowing nothing, he has this instinct that Aziraphale is the only one who can possibly understand why Gabriel did what he did. He is, I mean as far as we know, the only other angel who has fallen in love. (In general, let alone with a demon.)

But nope, can’t have that. We can throw the promise of restoring Crowley in the mix to sweeten the pot, but we can’t acknowledge why he’d want that so badly in the first place. So now it’s cause they work so well together. We can praise the angel for the fallen archangel Gabriel himself coming to him protection and guidance, give him a gold star. But we couldn’t DARE imply that it was by virtue of Aziraphale’s courage to choose earthly love over heavenly. How Gabriel didn’t need a leader, but a friend who’s truly known the joys of adoring that “particular person” and the pain of needing to hide it.

Cause then Aziraphale would start getting crazy ideas, like that his silly little human feelings have a great deal of worth. That they have the power to inspire, form cracks in the institution, fundamentally weaken what has controlled and harmed him. We wouldn’t want him to know the true value of the cards he holds when he has the ace in a match against you, now would we? After all…

Metatron uses this ingeniously sinister tactic of taking away Aziraphale’s choice while giving the illusion that he’s actually opening up doors. Notice how he tells Aziraphale he would have the authority to do something as extraordinary as turn a demon into an angel, yet he never once puts the much simpler alternative of just working with a demon on the table? The sleight of hand here is that he’s being offered the opportunity to freely be with Crowley… but he’s already freely with him as is, no bargain to be made. In fact he fought to be. Metatron disappears this accomplishment right before our eyes, while seamlessly maintaining the illusion to Aziraphale that he (Zira) is in control.

He sets Aziraphale up for failure by only providing the option he knows Crowley will not only decline but be deeply hurt by. It’s all so cleverly planned. Once this plays out exactly how he wants, he delivers the finishing blow by diminishing Crowley and his “damned fool questions”. Suddenly doing a complete 180 and emphasizing how foolish and troublesome he is. Metatron was offering Crowley by Aziraphale’s side as The Carrot. Now he’s telling Aziraphale it was stupid of him to want The Carrot, un-heavenly.

Aziraphale’s life, love, happiness, it’s all not only a massive inconvenience for Metatron but a liability. He has successfully taken a weapon from Aziraphale’s hands he didn’t even know he had. Metatron sees the writing on the wall, and he wants it contained.

[entelodontidae]

I always go into queer media thinking “oh this is just a silly show about pirates” or “oh this is just a silly fanfiction of the bible” or “oh it’s a goofy horror podcast” and then it turns out to be the most emotionally devastating piece of media I’ve ever seen

[dingledraw]

They’ll reheat them later 🍜🩷

[ineffablelunatics]

So when Aziraphale and Crowley switch and they get ice creams, Crowley ends up with a vanilla cone with a flake and Aziraphale gets a red popsicle(I don’t know what it’s called in other places sorry). Why?

I would like to propose that it doesn’t matter who gets what, because Aziraphale orders both. Crowley gets whatever Aziraphale wants, because he’s going to give it to him anyway. In the book, there’s a similar situation with Angels food cake. Crowley orders it then eats a bite and gives it to Aziraphale. If both of the ice creams are for Aziraphale, then he mostly gave Crowley the vanilla cone w/ a flake for aesthetics

[sentientsky]

a hastily thrown-together good omens shitpost made with my actual real life text message conversations

(here’s part 2)