#and for those who are questioning why i didn’t do the walker tails uses in sa2

[frederickkatz]

My feelings are fatal

TIME: November 22nd, 2024 PLACE: Evergreen Graveyard BETWEEN: Adam ( @adamnvamp ) & Fredrick NOTES: Written on Discord. 

Freddie wasn't sure why he had done this. It was always easier to talk to Adam through texts, but he lately realized that his words might be misunderstood through this via of communication and he didn't want any confusion about this. He sighed as he appeared himself at the cemetery, near a big tree where he could sense Adam's energy. He was carrying two thermoses, one with coffee and one with Adam's usual order at the blood bar. He smiled when he spotted the vampire. Outside. In daylight. He arched a brow as he got closer, "Daywalker uh? another perk of dating a fae?" he asked amused and curious as he handed the thermoses to Adam with a polite smile.

The sudden energy around the graveyard surprised him and Adam turned with a smile "Hello there" he waved, putting the rake he used to gather leaves to the side. "Day walker?" He questioned with a tilted head "Ah, because I'm out in the day? Yeah, it's- it's a nice perk. Takes the humans off your tail in no time if they ever get suspicious" he accepted the thermos. He wasn't really hungry, tasting Devon always left him energized anyway, but he knew sharing a drink was an important part of important conversations. "Please, have a seat" the vampire gestured to the bench, taking a seat himself "What has brought you in today?"

Freddie nodded, “it’s a term that has been use for centuries to name vampires who can walk in the daylight. Either by blood or demonic deals,” he explained wondering how much Adam actually knew of his own kind, “angelic and fae blood are the only ones who allow vampires not to be affected by the sun and holy water,” he added just as a fun fact, “oh that too, I always forget about humans and their suspicious,” he shrugged. He accepted the invitation as he sipped his coffee, “I realized that sometimes talking through texts doesn’t give the right vibe and things can be taken out of contexts,” he started, “I would also like to ask for your discretion about this. I know you and Devon probably trust each other with everything, but this is something I don’t want anyone else to know,” he continued.

Adam listened with interest, humming along "Oh I had no idea" he said, the angelic blood was a surprise "I'm not really into Vampiric history or politics, to be honest. I try to be on the verge of it, especially to keep Devon safe" the vampire said, excusing his ignorance. "Of course. I trust Devon with my life, but your secrets are yours to tell, Frederick. He doesn't know of the things we talk about" he shrugged "I'm assuming this is about Cameron?"

“Makes sense, the less you know the safer it is for him, but I think it’s important you know more about your kind. Especially about the things you can and can’t do,” he suggested in a calmed tone, so Adam didn’t feel judged. He nodded when Adam said he assumed it was about Cameron, “yes, and no, in the end is about me,” he sighed, “Do you remember we talked about how it is when we come back to life? The lack of feelings and their development? I mean, for you it was easier because you knew about feelings when you were human so you could relate and compare and understand when you were feeling that again, right?” he said looking at the thermos in his hands, “I don’t have that advantage. I don’t have anything to compare with, and in my head I separate physical feelings, like needs, from emotional ones,” he explained, “the physical ones are easier to understand. Cold, warmth, tiredness, arouse, hunger, attraction, pain…” he listed some, “emotional ones are harder to decipher, especially cause me being what I am, I’m more used and related to the negative ones. Anger, violence, hate, dislike… so it’s odd for me to feel things I don’t quite understand, and I don’t know what to do with that or how to act on those,” he sighed hoping he was making any sense.

"Oh, I'd love to learn, I just don't keep close contact with any other vampire for Dev's safety. But if you'd be willing, we could have a drink sometime and you can enlighten me with what you know" he smiled, showing he wasn't feeling judged, and at the same time, that it wouldn't be today. Today it was about Freddie. Adam listened carefully, sipping from his thermos. It tasted like warm stale coke after having Devon that morning, but what can you do? "Okay, I'm following" he said, nodding "You think there's some new, emotional feelings coming up?"

Freddie smiled, “I don’t that much but I’ll be glad to share what I do know. I’m pretty sure there are some books at the library I could point out for you to learn more about yourself,” he offered. “Yes,” he said simply, “I know my siblings, Warren specially would know exactly what I’m going through but the thing is that Warren has a way to get in people’s heads and business and I don’t want him to do that with Cameron,” he said seriously with a small frown and then he sighed, “How did you realize that you had feelings for Devon?”

"I'd like that" he said simply, nodding along to Freddie's words. "You're worried he'd make Cameron think he felt something he wasn't feeling?" Adam asked honestly, then paused, trying to put his memories into words. "Well, I knew I had feelings for him when I noticed that our sexual encounters weren't just sex anymore" he shrugged, a small smile on his lips "We started dating backwards, so at first we hooked up a few times. Then we spent more time together and... and at some point I realized I couldn't imagine my life without him anymore. Or I could, but it wouldn't be a life worth living" Adam paused again, trying to bring it to a more practical answer "There was this tightness in my chest, a very specific one. When I made him sad, it felt like a hand was squeezing my innards, but when I made him happy my organs seemed to grow so much they barely fit in my ribcage."

Freddie smile a little, keeping in mind some books he should bring to Adam next time they meet up. He shook his head at the question, “No, I’m worried he might make Cameron think I’m feelings things I’m not feeling yet,” he sighed, “Warren means well,” he added, “he wants me to do well in this human thing but I’m not a fast learner as he is. He moves quite faster through the motions. I haven’t been in human form for thousands of years while it’s been the opposite for him so that’s why it’s harder for me. He pushes a little too much as I imagine all older siblings do,” he huffed, “it’s unnerving, honestly,” he shrugged. He listened carefully at Adam’s description and in a way it was all very similar to how his relationship with Cameron had started, “It sounds quite similar because what I have with Cameron started strictly as sex. It was supposed to be a power role agreement. It works for us, but these kinds of agreements are not supposed to involve feelings. It’s supposed to be only physical gratification…” he let out a deep sigh, “the things is that Cameron is just…” he huffed, “since the beginning it’s been different with him. He just falls in the role so naturally that only made me want him more and lately it’s more than just for physical gratification,” he admitted feeling a stupid and unusual blush in his face.

Adam hummed, nodding along and not commenting on how Freddie worded it. Yet, huh. "I've been an only child myself, but from the stories Devon has told me... I'm pretty sure meaning well but being an absolute nuisance is the job description of an older sibling" he shrugged with a playful smile. It was gratifying to see Freddie opening up, for real, for the first time and Adam busied himself drinking his awful drink to give him time to elaborate as much as he wanted "It starts as physical gratification, but you come back" he said simply "Have you ever wondered what makes you keep coming back to him? When it happened with Devon, I had just started regaining feeling, it was almost intoxicating. Like I kept craving this high, this rush, until... I realized it wasn't just that." The vampire offered his own answer, trying to help the horseman not be embarrassed. "What else do you think it is, between you and Cameron, that's not physical gratification?"

Freddie chuckled at the description Adam provided about older siblings, “I envy you for not having to deal with older siblings. I have two and one of them is fed up with me to the point they sent me away, and the other is a true pain in the ass,” he huffed. He nodded, “I have but it’s not all that simple. You see, this is my first time in a male body. All my other times playing human were as a woman, and as a women sex with male and females was way too different as what it is in a male body,” he looked away cause sharing this made him feel exposed and slightly uncomfortable to tell it to someone else, “I’ve been in this body for over two hundred years, and I mostly focused on women. Cameron wasn’t the first male who hit on me, but it was the first who made me want to try more. He has also been the only male I’ve been involved in the kind of agreement we have, so I’m not sure if that’s the reason, or if it is because he’s fae, or because he just falls into what I need so naturally and easily that is intoxicating and addictive,” he blushed again cause it did sound similar to what Adam had described.

“He wanted to hang out,” he rolled his eyes but kept on smiling, “he said we were friends apart from the sex thing and he said friends hang out and just share things and I’ve never had friends before, I do now, but it’s still different with him and I found myself enjoying those little hangouts. Most times they end up in sex and the sex is still what we agreed on and everything our deal entails, but…” he swallowed hard, “we kept apart for a few days because I was dealing with some family issues,” he said bitterly, “and dealing with work and moving to a new place and I found myself craving his presence, his voice, his texts, his smile, his silly jokes and when we finally saw each other it was not how sex usually was between us and I wasn’t bothered about it, but I don’t want to say things I don’t understand and confuse him or give him hope of something I’m not sure I’m capable of feelings…. Besides, he is dating someone, and I don’t want to mess up with that,” he shrugged taking a sip of his coffee.

"Ah yes, I've heard that many times, but I myself would've loved having a sibling, so I guess we're never happy with what we have, right?" He smiled, listening as he turned the thermos around his hands. "Ah, now it makes sense why it's such a complicated topic" the vampire nodded with a small frown. "I'm not going to pretend like I understand what your deal entails, and to be honest that's between you two and I wouldn't even want to intrude" he started gently "But let me ask you this: If you went out tonight, and you found another man, who was similar in bed, who fell into this role just as well as Cameron did and gave you everything you crave from sex with him... Would you stop seeing Cameron?" The vampire prompted, sincerely. "Because the other times we talked about him, sex was always the primal point, and now... It comes out like an afterthought, almost." He shrugged, with a heavy sigh "Ah yes, Trevor right? That complicates things further." Adam let a silence stretch between them "I know it's not your nature, but please entertain me for a moment. If you could imagine your life as perfect as it could be, the most ideal and utopic or sceneries, be it now or in ten years or a hundred. Would you want to be feeling... something you're not sure you're capable of feeling right now... for Cameron?"

Freddie hummed and nodded, "And here I thought that was merely a human flaw," he said playfully. Freddie took a moment before answering, "the thing is that after that first time with Cameron, I did look out for others. I did sleep with others and even tried the same agreement, but it just didn't feel the same. Some where too eager and others not eager enough. Cameron just fit in perfectly on what I didn't know I was looking for," he admitted, "even while I was sleeping with others, I kept coming back for Cameron," he added. "It's not quite like that. How familiar are you with the Dominant and submissive dynamics?" He asked because that played a huge role on his relationship with Cameron, and he didn't want Adam to compare it to a more romantic kind of situation. "The think all of you fail to understand is that there are feelings I don't know how they feel because I've never felt them. I don't know what love feels like. I don't know what compassion feels like. I don't know what nostalgia feels like. I don't know what they are, that is why I keep saying I don't know if I'm capable of feeling them," he deflated a little at that, "I'm not trying to be evasive and I say I don't want to feel those things, I just don't know what they are," he added with a frown.

Adam listened carefully, nodding along. He was surprised when the subject of Dominance and submissiveness came up, though. "I'm familiar" he said simply, prompting the other.

It was visible how frustrated Freddie seemed to be with the situation and the vampire took a long moment to work out what to say. "The way I see it, love isn't just one feeling." He said, placing his drink to the side to get Freddie's attention "Love is a bundle of emotions. That's why it's so complex and different for everyone, because it's build of different blocks for everyone. Some people's love is built on sex, others have nothing to do with sex at all - that's why it's hard to explain" He smiled "My love for my old fiancée, it burned. Not like a fire, but like liquor. It had lust mixed with happiness and anger and discovery. When I came back, I looked for it, and I couldn't find it. Then, my love for him became a mix of nostalgia, of melancholy, and care. Because I still care deeply about him, but there was no spark left" Adam paused, closing his eyes to access it, a stupid smile on his lips "My love for Devon is built on fun. It's bubbly and soft and sexy and comfortable. It's happiness and change and care and devotion. It's like... the feeling of being fresh out of the shower or the sensation of jumping into a pool on a hot day. It's the silly temporary satisfaction of filling a cup to the brim and not spilling over or finding your favorite shirt in the back of the wardrobe when you've forgotten it exists. It's completely ordinary happenings that make me feel lucky. Because I wasn't looking for it, but this love for Devon found me anyway."

Freddie nodded when Adam said he was familiar with the dynamics, "I've moved into that lifestyle most of the time I've been corporeal and it's the first time I found someone who just fulfills that need and it's someone who's fairly new to it all. I've tried it with new people and experimented people and still Cameron just works for me," he explained without giving details on their roles.

Adam was being more than helpful with the way he explained it, sadly, most of the examples he gave were completely foreign for Freddie but in the end he got what the vampire was trying to explain, "I imagined there was not one definition of what love is or feels like, I just wish there was a way for me to understand it. You, like Cameron and Devon, we're humans once and for most of your lives, which is the thing that differentiate me and my siblings from you and why it's hard. You all grew up and learned through experiences what the feeling are. I was created an adult. My learning process is biased. Technically I'm not supposed to feel positive things and I haven't experienced them until recently, that is why this brain cannot connect the dots to understand the things in feeling," he sighed, "I'm not saying I feel love for Cameron or that I don't. I just don't know what are those things he makes me feel," he shrugged, "I do know I care about him. I want him to be happy, I want him to be safe. I don't like it when he's sad or hurt. I like it when he smiles and when he starts talking nonstop about something he's passionate about, but I don't know what to do with it," he leaned back and looked at the sky setting in the horizon, "I don't want to tell him much about this because I don't want to give him hope and then hurt him if I can't feel what he might expect me to feel. Especially now he has someone who's feelings are reciprocated."

Adam nodded along, careful not to prod "Okay, and what's the issue with it? If he works for you, isn't it good? Isn't it... what you'd hope to find?" He asked with a soft voice, grabbing his thermos again.

He took a long sip of it, sighing when Freddie finished "I understand. And I actually think it's very emotionally mature of you, to care so deeply about his feelings like this" The vampire paused "I'm afraid I'm not some emotion-doctor, who could diagnose you with love or passion or whatever it is you're feeling. But still I'd like to offer you something to think about" he waited until Freddie looked at him. "Words are just definitions. They're made up, and we assign meaning to them. I could write poetry about love, but in the end it is just a four-lettered word" Adam smiled "What I mean, is: you mentioned you're learning about these feelings with Cameron, and he's learning about this lifestyle with you. You can both learn this kind of love - or whatever name you'd like to give it - together. You can even ask him, what he expects from someone who loves him, what they're expected to feel. You can tell him what you feel, however you understand it, and as long as it's an honest and open conversation, there won't be any hopes built to fall. Cameron is many things, but he's not stupid. If you explain it to him, he'll understand. Just as I did."

Freddie hesitated for a moment about the subject, but he found a way to explain it, "Since day one all the times I've had sex with Cameron was in a scene. All of them but the last time. I don't know what that was, but it wasn't a scene, and it wasn't casual sex either and I don't know how I feel about it," he finally said.

He was thankful for Adam's opinion on the way he cared about Cameron's feelings and he smiled a bit sadly when the vampire said he couldn't help him giving him an answer because there wasn't one. "I appreciate that very much," he said with a nod even though he didn't really like the idea of talking to Cameron about this, "I know he's not stupid but he's also not very patient. The only time we had some sort of disagreement was because he pushed me to put a name on the things I was feeling in that moment. I know he was trying to help but if I tell him now about this chaos inside of me, he'll want to help me categorized then and I think it's something I need to do on my own and at my pace," he sighed sadly, "he really doesn't like waiting and I know he will want to try to be patient but I know the wait will still hurt him so maybe it is something I need to figure out on my own before telling him anything."

"And was it something you'd like to have again?" Adam asked simply.

"I'd say to give him a chance, we change, and we learn, so does he. I say that because I saw him leaving Devon's apartment the other day, I'm assuming it was while you were away, and he looked absolutely miserable. When we care about people, we put in extra effort to make sure they're understood." He nodded along "I understand. Either way, it's your decision. But if you think talking it out with anyone could help, you know where to find me."

Freddie frowned and considered it for a moment, "remember when we talked about I've fight and fly instinct? I felt that but I didn't let it win because I knew that if I left in that very moment, Cameron would have been hurt and I promise not to hurt him again if I could help it. So I'm not sure I would want it to happen again," he admitted.

He nodded but didn't vocally agree, "see that's exactly why I'm being careful. He's supposed to be happy with Trevor and not feeling bad because I had to stay away to handle some things," he sighed tiredly, "Thank you, Adam. I really appreciate it, it has helped a lot, it really has, and I don't know how to repay you for this," he smiled.

Adam nodded "It makes sense." He said "If that fight or flight instinct calmed down, thinking about the rest of the encounter, would you want it to happen again?" Adam asked "I say that because that instinct is normal when something is new, but as you get used to it, it goes away. But if the whole thing is something you didn't like, there's no reason to overthink it when you can just go back to your normal sessions, don't you think?"

The comment made Adam chuckle softly and he hid behind his hand "I'm sorry, it's just that.... Frederick, being in a relationship doesn't mean someone is happy all of the time. To go through emotions is... if not human, inherit of the living experience. If he was sad about something, it's because that something mattered to him, and no amount of love in the world can keep you from feeling bad emotions from time to time" He shrugged when Freddie thanked him, asking how to repay him "You're doing your best to keep Cameron safe, his safety matters a lot to Devon, and he matters to me, so... don't mention it, ok? We're good, mate."

Freddie shook his head, "it didn't calm down. I pushed it down but I still feel it when I think about it," he admitted, "I would rather to go back to our usual scenes," he said even if it didn't feel entirely right.

The laugh made him arch a brow, "I know that, not by experience obviously, I just don't want to affect his life that much. It's not fair and it feels wrong," he said not really wanting to get into more detail. Who would've know that talking feelings was so exhausting? He smiled a bit and nodded, "Thank you, Adam, really. You are a really good friend," he said offering his hand for a shake.

The answer he got made him sigh. Baby steps. "Then that's what you do. Try that out and let me know how you feel about it, ok?"

"I'm afraid you can't control how much he lets you affect his life, buddy. That's his choice" the vampire said, then smiled at the thanks, shaking Freddie's hand back "Thanks, man."

Freddie nodded even if he had no intention to give Adam feedback about his next encounter with Cameron, "alright, I'll try it out, thanks."

He huffed at the answer, "I wish I could," he admitted. He nodded and picked his thermos back, "I probably should let you go back to work," he said standing up, "see you around?"

"I know, buddy" he said with a tight smile, then nodded with an actual smile, getting up as well "See you around, Freddie. Take care!"

[masterofmunson]

look after you (1)

TFATWS Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader

Summary: Sam asks you to join him and Bucky on a mission in Madripoor. When you get injured, Bucky feels the need to remind you more than once that he’s supposed to look after you now that Steve’s gone.

Warnings: tfatws spoilers, language, violence, blood, grief, angst, major pining

Word Count: 6k+ 

Author’s Note: Here she is!! I’m really excited to see what you guys think! This is my first Bucky fic in AGES! I decided to make this into a mini series since this fic is so long haha. Please let me know what you think. Comments, reblogs, and asks are highly encouraged and appreciated! Enjoy!

You hadn’t seen Sam or Bucky in several weeks. You were still adjusting to life post-blip. It had been a long five years for you and just seconds for them. You were no longer the bright-eyed and bushy tailed recruit. You’d grown into your position amongst the established and experienced Avengers. Now, it meant nothing. 

Tony’s gone. Steve’s dead, Natasha too. The Avengers had officially disbanded. You felt lost and confused, still blinded by your grief over losing them. You had nowhere to go, so you just floated from place to place as needed. 

You were laying low and a shell of the person you once were. You had no one to look towards anymore. Bucky went his separate ways and got some sort of footing in New York City with the pardon he was given by the government since his return to the states. You checked in every now and then with him, but you didn’t want to slow down his progress so you distanced yourself from him. 

You know he feels some sort of responsibility towards you. Steve did too, and you suppose now that he’s gone, Bucky feels the need to take his place. It doesn’t matter that you’re no longer the naive 23 year old he met in Berlin all those years ago. It doesn’t matter that there was something lingering between the two of you before he turned to ash. You’re a grown woman now and war and politics has hardened your soul. 

He needs to move on from you. The version he has of you in his head is gone, dead. He wants a fresh start, and you can’t give it to him. 

Sam checks in with you once in a while. He asks you how you’re doing and you respond the same each time. “Same shit, different day,” you laughed lightly. 

He knows better than to ask you to join him on his missions with the military. You’re not in the right headspace to return to the field, least of all if it meant that you were representing the US government wherever the fight was. 

Now that John Walker has the shield and has been branded the new Captain America, it gives you all the more reason to stay away. If he had so much as just breathed in your direction, you’d kill him and rip the shield from his grasp and return it to Sam. 

You ignored all emails and phone calls that had to do with John Walker. He wanted your blessing on live television, as if that meant anything. Yes, you were close with Steve, but you’re not an original Avenger. You just caught his eye during training one day and he took you under his wing. John Walker just wanted to create a bridge between the two of you since Sam and Bucky were obviously out of the question. 

You were the first person Sam called when he told you he was giving up the shield. You didn’t ask why. You knew he had his reasons and you respected him to accept that whatever the reasons were, they were good enough. 

So, when Sam called in the middle of the night, you picked up the phone without a second thought. Rubbing the sleep from your eyes, you sit up and fumble for the light on the nightstand beside you. 

“Sam? You do realize it’s three in the morning, right?” you asked, yawning into your phone. 

Sam curses in your ear and apologizes quietly. “Sorry. You would think with all this traveling, I’d remember time zones are a thing,” he laughed softly. 

“What is it, Sam?” 

“We’re in a bit of a tight spot. We could use your help.”

Your brows pinch together. “Who’s we, Sam?”

“Me and Barnes.”

Your heart jumps inside your throat. How the hell did Sam manage to rope Bucky into whatever he’s doing? The last you heard, Bucky wasn’t allowed to go on government missions until his therapist thought he made enough progress to do so. You know he’s nowhere near the progress he wants to be, so how is he with Sam? 

“Jesus, Sam. You know he’s not in the right headspace to go on missions!” There’s a heavy pause between the two of you before you relent. “Where am I meeting you?”

“Latvia. I’ll fill you in when you get here.”

You hang up quickly and hurry out of bed. After so many years of getting up at odd hours for emergency missions and the like, you’re not surprised that Sam asked you to meet him in the middle of the night. You grab your duffle bag and stuff all your belongings back inside. You travel lightly, and now it definitely seemed to work out in your favor. 

You’ve spent the last couple of weeks in a small town just outside of Helena, Montana. It’s nice and quiet and you’ve really taken the time to reflect on your life since things started going back to normal post-blip. The locals are nice and hospitable, and no one asks you about Steve, Tony, or what you thought of John Walker. You hope it had something to do with the fact that they didn’t know who you were. You certainly hoped that was the case. You’ve kept your head down and tried your best to blend in. 

You go hiking quite frequently and take drives through the mountains. It’s nice and relaxing, a far cry from what you’re used to. You’ll definitely miss it, and you have second thoughts about meeting up with Sam, but you push them away. Steve abandoned you both, and you wouldn’t do that to him. 

It takes you several hours to get to the closest international airport and by the time you arrive, the sun begins to rise in the distance. You hurry through the airport security and send Sam a quick update that you’re about to board your flight before you settle in your seat and fall back asleep.

....

You sleep through the entire flight. You blame it on your ability to sleep anywhere due to the number of missions you have under your belt. You’re wide awake when the plane lands and you’re quick to pull out your phone and send a message to Sam that you’ve made it safe and sound to Latvia. 

Your legs are stiff and sore when you stand up for the first time when it’s time to leave. You pull your duffle bag from the overhead compartment and slowly make your way to the front. It takes you nearly an hour to get through customs and now you’re just anxiously waiting to see Sam. 

When you see him waiting for you at the baggage claim area, you grin as your eyes meet. You hurry over to him and drop your duffle bag to the floor as he pulls you in for a hug. It’s warm and tight and it’s exactly what you need. Sam pulls away first and reaches for your bag, throwing an arm over your shoulder as you walk out of the airport to his car. 

You stop walking when you notice two figures near a very fancy yellow car as you and Sam near them. Sam keeps walking and you take slow, tentative steps. You know one of the figures has to be Bucky, but Sam never mentioned a third person. 

“Sam, I thought you said that it was just you and Bucky,” you said cautiously. 

Sam stops in his tracks and lets out a nervous chuckle and scratches the back of his head. It makes your heart race and you swallow the lump in your throat as they begin to come into focus as they near the two of you. “Y/n, before you get angry, I just need you to know that this wasn’t my idea. Believe me when I tell you that he is the last person we would ask for help,” Sam replied as his eyes went from you to the two people approaching.

“Who is he?” you asked through gritted teeth. 

“Ah! Y/n, good to know that your flight went rather smoothly. It is good to see you again.”

No. There’s no way. You must be dreaming. Hemlut Zemo is not standing right in front of you. He is in prison. He is behind bars for the crimes he committed. The two men that you're closest to wouldn’t jailbreak someone as atrocious as Zemo. There has to be an explanation. It doesn’t make sense. 

“What the fuck is Zemo doing out of prison?!” you hissed, looking between Bucky and Sam, demanding an explanation. 

“Y/n, honey, I can explain, just please get in the car,” Bucky pleaded, reaching out to touch your hand. 

You glare at him and take a step back. “Are you out of your mind, Bucky? You break him out of jail because you need him, is that it? Do you remember what he did to you, because I certainly do!”

Bucky frowns and lets out a deep and heavy sigh. He looks over at Sam. “Did you fill her in at all?”

“No!” you shouted. “I can speak for myself, James! Someone better start talking and tell me what the hell is going on!”

“We don’t really have time for this right now,” Zemo interrupts, “we really must be going. I’m sure Sam and James can fill you in in the car.”

You glare at the Sokovian terrorist and snap at him. “Shut your mouth, Zemo.”

He raises his hands up in surrender and takes a step back. Bucky towers over you and this time you let him take your hand. He squeezes it gently and pulls you into his chest, hugging you tightly. You’re tense and fuming as he holds you. 

His mouth finds the shell of your ear and despite the wave of anger flowing through your body, it sends a shiver down your spine. Bucky whispers, “I hate to say it, but Zemo’s right. We have to go. I’ll explain on the way, I promise.”

You huff childishly and turn your head away from him as he kisses your temple. “Fine. If he steps out of line, I’ll kill him.”

Bucky laughs and takes your hand and walks you to the car. “Get in line, honey. Sam and I have first dibs.”

You resist the urge to smile and Bucky opens the door for you as Sam tosses your bag in the trunk and climbs into the front seat. Bucky slides in beside you and he tells you everything.

He tells you about their first encounter with the Flag Smashers. He tells you about how the leader and a few of her followers have taken a newer version of the serum that runs through his veins. He tells you that she plans on giving the serum to more people to build an army and that you have to stop her. 

It makes your heart stop. You hadn’t really been keeping tabs on the Flag Smashers. Now, looking back, you probably should have. There’s still a lot of unknown variables to account for and it looks like the boys are taking it one step at a time, and apparently it starts with a trip to Madripoor. Zemo chimes in every now and then as he drives and it makes your blood boil that you’re forced to listen to what he has to say. You hate that he has the upper hand and is keeping valuable information hostage. You want to strangle him. 

After a while, Zemo pulls into a private airport. Bucky helps you out of the car and grabs your bag from the trunk as the four of you walk towards the jet just off the runway. You had no idea just how rich Zemo was. Now that he’s out of prison, for now at least, his arrogance returned back in full force in addition to his pompous attitude. 

You board the plane in silence, ignoring every word coming out of the Baron’s mouth. You settle in the back of the plane and ignore Bucky’s stares as you look out the window. You’re too angry to engage in conversation. You don’t care that Zemo insults Steve’s legacy. He’s gone, dead, what do you care? Yes, you wanted Steve to be happy, but he abandoned you. He abandoned Sam and Bucky. 

Zemo rambles on and on. “People like Steve become symbols, icons. Then we start to forget about their flaws. From there, cities fly, innocent people die. Movements are formed, wars are fought,” he turns to address Bucky directly. “You remember that, right? As a young soldier sent to Germany to stop a mad icon. Do we want to live in a world full of people like the Red Skull?”

Silence fills the space and for a moment, you feel a reprieve. That was until Zemo mentioned the Winter Soldier. 

 “We can’t go into Madripoor as ourselves. James, you will have to become someone you claim is gone.”

You immediately stand up and protest, storming to the front of the plane. “No. Absolutely not. I won’t let you use Bucky, not again. There has to be another way.”

Zemo clicks his tongue at you and shakes his head. A smug graces his features and you lung at him, wrapping your hands around his throat. “I’ll fucking kill you!”

Bucky leaps to his feet and tears you off of Zemo, dragging you to the back of the plane behind the curtains to give the two of you an illusion of privacy. Your shoulders shake with rage and Bucky’s hands caress your face. 

“You can’t be him. He’s not you anymore. You don’t have to do this, Bucky. Please,” you begged, clinging to his hands. “I can’t let Zemo control you again.”

Bucky’s touched with how protective you are over him. He pulls you closer and hugs you tightly against him. Your fingers grip the back of his shirt and he presses a gentle kiss to the top of your head. 

“Honey,” he whispered. “I have to. I have to do this so we can stop the Flag Smashers from getting the serum. It’s for the mission.”

You huffed against his chest. Now you’re really regretting your decision to help Sam. You would’ve said no if you had known that it meant watching Bucky turn into the Winter Soldier again, even if it wasn’t real. 

You don’t know what to say. He won’t change his mind. Bucky’s just as stubborn as you are and he’ll do anything for the success of the mission, just like Steve did. 

You pull away and return back to your seat, crossing your arms over your chest as you stare into the back of Zemo’s plush leather seat. Bucky trails behind you and squeezes your shoulder. You shrug off his touch as he takes the empty seat next to yours. 

“And, I’m afraid that where we’re going doesn’t take too kindly to women who are…. how do I put this…. strong willed,” Zemo said. 

“What is that supposed to mean?” Bucky barked, jumping to your defense just moments after you did the same for him.

“Selby will see Y/n as competition. We can’t have that happen. She’ll have to stay behind.”

“You’re out of your mind if you think I’m just going to just sit here and do nothing,” you snapped. “I’m coming with. I don’t care if I have to pretend to be meek.”

Zemo turns to look at you. He’s challenging you. You both know it. He’s pushing your buttons and it’s working. He smirks and leans against the armchair. His eyebrows raise and he asks, “Even if it means pretending to be a prostitute?”

Your gaze doesn’t falter and you ignore both Sam’s and Bucky’s protests. It falls on deaf ears. You don’t care, as long as you’re with Sam and Bucky and they’re safe. “Yes,” you answered without a second thought. You’ve done worse things than pretend to be a sex worker. It would be a piece of cake. 

Zemo grins, letting out a soft laugh. “It looks like you’ll be joining us after all then, Y/n.”

You scoff at him and look out the window. Bucky drags you from your seat once more and pulls you behind the curtain. You look away from him and he reaches to squeeze your hand. 

“You don’t have to do this. You have nothing to prove,” he whispered, brushing the top of your palm with his warm and calloused fingers. 

“You don’t either,” you mumbled back. 

He smiles softly at your retort and pulls you into his arms. He holds you gently and cards his fingers through your hair. You hum quietly as he holds you. 

“Touché, honey.”

There’s a beat of silence between the two of you before you lean back to meet his gaze. His blue eyes pierce through yours and it makes your heart race. You pull away and rub your palms against your thighs. 

You disappear behind the curtain once more, leaving Bucky behind. 

…

When you arrive in Madripoor, you’re dressed in an outfit that leaves little to the imagination. The dress has a plunging neckline that settles just below your naval. Your chest is barely covered and your boobs threaten to slip over the fabric. You’re dressed for the part, that’s for sure. 

Zemo is the first one to look at you when you return from behind the curtain. He whistles at you and it makes your skin crawl. 

Bucky shoves Zemo harshly and grips his chest tightly, snarling in his face. “Watch your mouth,” Bucky hissed, shoving him into one of the chairs. 

He turns to look at you and you reach to squeeze his hand. You pull him away from Zemo and whisper softly, “It’s alright, Buck. Take a deep breath.”

He grits his teeth and shakes his head, and does what you ask. “I’ll kill him. If he does that again, I’ll kill him.”

You laugh softly and press a gentle kiss to his cheek. “I don’t doubt you will, Buck.”

The two of you trail behind Sam and Zemo as you leave the plane. A sleek black car is waiting just off the runway and you follow behind to the vehicle. When you settle into your spot in between Buck and Sam in the back, Zemo turns to look at the three of you. 

“It’s imperative that we don’t break character, no matter what. If you do, we’re good as dead, understand?” 

You scoff and roll your eyes as he looks towards you. “Crystal,” you snapped, crossing your arms over your chest. 

He turns to face the front of the vehicle and silence fills the car. 

Suddenly, a number of motorcycles surround the car as you drive into Low Town. you make sure to keep your eyes forward and Bucky reaches for the hand on your knee. He squeezes it tightly and you do the same. 

Reality is now just setting in for you. This is the first mission that you’ve been on since Steve went back to the 40s, and since Tony died. It had been three long months since Tony saved the world and brought everyone back that was taken five years earlier. You know that three months isn’t long, but it still makes you nervous. You haven’t been training to keep things from going rusty. You had no desire to. 

Bucky leans into you, his mouth near the shell of your ear. “You okay?” 

You nodded, swallowing the lump in your throat. “Yeah, just a bit nervous. I’m a little out of practice. This is my first mission since Steve left,” you mumbled back, squeezing his hand again to keep you grounded. He does the same in return. 

“It’s alright. I have your back. I’ll protect you, promise.”

A small smile finds its way onto your face and you shake your head at him. “You know better than anyone else than to promise something like that before a mission, Buck. It’s bad luck,” you teased. 

He laughs too and the car stops in what you guess is the downtown area of Low Town. You take a deep breath and Bucky does the same. You squeeze his hand one last time before his hand falls from your grasp. He opens the door and climbs out. You follow close behind and find your spot next to Sam. He gingerly wraps his arm around your waist as you walk into the Princess Bar. 

Electronic music blasts through the speakers and the bass vibrates through your chest. You press against Sam as you push through people to get to the bar. The smell of drugs and alcohol is suffocating as you walk and ignore the stares sent your way. They’re not staring at you, but Bucky, who walks just a step behind you like a looming shadow. 

“Ready to comply, Winter Soldier?” Zemo asked Bucky in Russian. 

It makes your blood boil and Sam squeezes your waist tightly, a reminder that you must not break character. You hate it. You hate that Bucky has to pretend to be the person he’s worked so hard to distance himself from. Bucky is not him. The Winter Soldier doesn’t exist anymore. That part of him is gone, dead. You only hope that Bucky reminds himself that the Winter Soldier isn’t him anymore as he pretends just feet behind you.

You stand in front of the bar counter as the bartender approaches. You keep your mouth shut as Zemo exchanges words with the man, briefly bringing Sam, the Smiling Tiger, into the conversation. Your eyes find Bucky’s and your heart jumps inside your throat. His eyes are cold and void of any emotion. He’s stoic and brooding. He’s fallen into character perfectly and it scares you to think that all the progress he’s made over the years has been destroyed in this moment. For his sake, you hope not.

You tear your eyes away from Bucky at the feeling of Sam’s hand on the curve of your ass. You watch him carefully as he takes a shot. The bartender moves on and you let out a careful breath. 

A man grasps at Zemo’s shoulder and sneers at him. He looks over at Bucky as Zemo asks to see Selby before he walks away. Another man approaches Zemo from behind and he speaks in Russian once more. “Winter Soldier, attack.” 

You hold your breath in anticipation as the unsuspecting man rests his hand on Zemo’s shoulder. You want to reach out and touch Bucky, tell him that he doesn’t have to, that the two of you still have time to make a run for it, but you don’t. You can’t. Zemo would probably try and kill you if you interfere and it’s the last thing you need. 

Bucky stalks over to him with two long strides, and rips the man’s hand from Zemo’s shoulder. He twists his wrist back and throws him to the ground. Another man swings at Bucky and he stops it with ease. He punches his back and kicks him against another crowny. As another man attempts to punch and kick at Bucky. He uses his metal arm and momentum to take each of them out.

“It doesn’t take much for him to fall back into form,” Zemo smirked, leaning over to look at you and Sam. 

“Shut your mouth,” you hissed between your teeth as you watched Bucky. 

Bucky grabs one of the men by the throat and slams him into the counter. Guns cock all around you as you look around the room. Your heart is inside your throat and there’s ringing in your ears. You reach to grab Bucky’s arm, but Sam beats you to it.

“Stay in character or the whole bar turns on us,” Zemo whispered. “Well done, soldier.”

Sam lets go of his arm and takes a step back, pulling you with him. He squeezes your hip tightly as you watch Bucky’s grip fall from the man’s throat.

“Selby will see you now,” the bartender said.

Zemo moves to follow him and you resist the urge to reach out and touch Bucky. Sam pulls you along and you walk in silence down a number of hallways. The music fades into the background and you’re squeezing Sam’s hand like your life depends on it. 

A number of men on Selby’s security detail whistle as you walk by. You bite your tongue and resist the urge to snap their necks. The four of you wait at the door at the end of the hall for several seconds before it opens. You walk inside and Zemo takes you from Sam’s side. Your jaw ticks as he guides you to the empty sofa. His hand settles on your thigh and you tense under his touch.

Zemo and Selby negotiate for information. All you need to know is who created the serum and where they are. That’s it. Zemo needs to stick to the plan. 

Zemo stands up from his spot next to you. “Tell us what you know about the super soldier serum, and I give you him…. along with the code words to control him,” Zemo stands behind Bucky, his hand resting on his shoulder. He’s silent and obedient, the perfect encapsulation of who he had been for the last 80 years. 

There wasn’t a discussion over what the offer would be when you were on the plane from Latvia. You just assumed Zemo would figure a way out of it, he was clever enough to do it before. You hadn’t thought that he would actually use the Winter Soldier to his benefit outside of protection. How naive of you. 

Bucky’s eyes are dark and he stares straight ahead as Zemo caresses his chin. He doesn’t flinch or react. He’s playing the Winter Soldier perfectly and you hate every second. You bite the inside of your cheek so hard that you start to taste blood. 

“He will do anything you want.”

Selby grins, leaning back in her spot on the couch opposite of you. She tells him what you need to know. She nears Sam and then the worst happens, his phone begins to ring. 

She tells him to answer it and your fingers squeeze into the leather couch. Your heart races and for the first time since you walked into the bar, Bucky’s eyes find yours. You know he can see your panic. 

Things are fine momentarily. Sam’s trying his best to stay in character and you know it’s not working as well as he’d like. You hold your breath and your panic settles in at the mention of Sam’s name coming from Sarah. 

“Kill them—” 

Your eyes widen in horror as a bullet pierces through the glass window in front of you and lodges into Selby’s throat, killing her instantly. The act is over. 

You leap to your feet and pull the tactical knife that you hid in your dress out from underneath you. You slice the knife across your attacker’s arm. Bucky kicks him into the wall and grabs you by the arm. 

You run as fast as you can out the bar and through the streets of Madripoor. You dodge bullets and fight off others that attack you with knives. 

You do well, all things considered with what you’re dressed in. You dig your heel into the boot of your attacker, throwing them off balance. You kick their leg out from underneath them and Sam knocks them unconscious. 

Bucky, of course, is doing just fine on his own. You run over to help. You disarm the man closer to you and use the butt of the gun to knock him out. 

You barely have time to register the man creeping up behind Bucky. His arm is outstretched with a gun in his hand. Bucky has no clue. 

“Bucky!” you screamed at the top of your lungs, running as fast as you can towards him. 

He turns to look at you as you use your whole body to shove him aside as the gun goes off. 

Time stands still. 

You fall to the ground in a daze as the bullet rips through your shoulder. Your eyes stare up into the night sky as it takes you a moment to realize that you’d just been shot. 

You try to sit up and get back on your feet. You don’t have time to worry about your wound. You need to get the hell out of Low Town. 

Bucky nearly drags you off the ground and you run. You run as fast as you can despite the bullet in your shoulder. 

“We need to get out of here!” Bucky shouted, inspecting your wound. 

A shadowy figure approaches and Bucky blocks you from view. The hood drops and you peer over Bucky’s shoulder. You don’t have time to be surprised that Sharon is the one standing in front of you. 

“Sharon? What are you doing here?” Sam asked. 

“We don’t have time for that!” Bucky snapped. “Sharon, please. You gotta help us. Y/n’s been shot.”

She nods and motions for you to follow her. She stops in front of a beautiful blue car and Bucky guides you into the car, pressing his metal hand against your shoulder to stop the bleeding. You ignore Sam and Bucky’s bickering as they yell at you for getting shot. You don’t have the energy to respond. 

Sharon races across town and pulls up to a very fancy building. Sharon jumps out and opens the door for Bucky. His arm holds your torso and your uninjured arm is thrown over his shoulder as you walk inside. You gather into the elevator as it takes you to the top floor. 

Your entire body goes numb and Bucky guides you to the kitchen counter. Sharon briefly disappears before returning with a heavy duty first aid kit. 

“Do you have tequila?” you asked her as Bucky rummaged through the bag for the correct supplies. Sharon laughs softly before grabbing a bottle of tequila from her liquor cabinet. You take a generous sip and the liquid burns your throat. 

Bucky inspects the bullet wound carefully. Thankfully it was a through and through. He doesn’t have to fish the bullet out. He works quickly and you grit your teeth as he stitches the wound close on both sides of your shoulder. 

The pain lessened to a dull throb now that he’s finished. He cleans the excess blood off your skin before gently placing your arm in a sling. 

“Why did you do that, Y/n?” Bucky chastised you, shaking his head in disappointment. “I could’ve taken care of him.”

You scoff and roll your eyes at him. “I don’t even get a thank you for saving your ass? You were vulnerable, I did the right thing.”

He sighs and you look away. Your eyes find Sharon’s. “Can I borrow some clothes?”

She nods and disappears down the hall to her bedroom. Silence fills the room and Sam takes his turn to reprimand you. You ignore him entirely and take another large swig of tequila. 

Sharon returns moments later with a pair of clean clothes. You thank her quietly and she points you in the direction of one of the guest bedrooms. You hop off the counter and ignore Bucky’s protests and calls of your name. 

You huffed in frustration as you limped towards one of Sharon’s guest bedrooms. You had enough of Sam and Bucky yelling at you for your recklessness, especially Bucky. You’re exhausted and all you want to do is sleep. 

You did what you thought was right. You did what Steve would’ve done. You had Bucky’s back. Isn’t that what mattered? Sure, you got shot in the shoulder, but it isn’t something you haven’t done before. You have the scars to prove it. 

“Stop running away from me! We’re not done talking about this!” Bucky yelled after you, hot on your heels into the bedroom. “What were you thinking?”

You’re sick of Bucky questioning you. You’re not a child and you’re not the bright eyed recruit he thinks you still are. You did what was right in the heat of the moment. You don’t regret it. You’d do it all over again if it meant that he was safe. 

“Stop treating me like a child, James! I’m not Steve’s recruit anymore! I’m a grown woman,” you shouted back at him. Your shoulders shake and you glare at him. “I know you still think I’m that naive 25 year old, but that’s not me anymore. The last five years may have been five seconds to you, but they weren’t to me. Accept the fact that I did what I thought was right.”

“It was reckless!”

“Steve would’ve done it!” you bit back. 

“This isn’t about Steve!” he argued. 

You laugh bitterly and shake your head. He doesn’t see it. He doesn’t see what you see. You know he sees you as his responsibility now that Steve’s gone. He feels an obligation to look after you because Steve did. You have a part of Steve with you. Bucky’s clinging to any last remains of Steve, and that includes you. 

“Isn’t it though? You feel like you have a responsibility to protect me, to look after me. Why? It’s because Steve did and now that he’s gone, you feel like you have to replace him!”

The silence that fills the room suffocates you. Your heart races with anger. You want Bucky to leave you alone. You didn’t ask for this. Sam needed your help, and when you provided it, you got yelled at for it. Now you just want to go home. 

You turn your back to Bucky and pull the pants that Sharon gave you up your legs before discarding the dress in the corner of the room. You don’t care if Bucky sees all the scars that litter your backside. Maybe then he would understand that you’ve always done what’s best for the mission, even if that meant getting hurt. You throw the sweatshirt over your head and turn to look at Bucky again. 

“Do you have anything else to say to me? Are you going to try and deny it?”

Bucky sighs, running a hand through his hair. “You’re one of the only people I have left that have a connection to Steve.”

Another bitter laugh escapes your mouth. He doesn’t understand. “He abandoned me, James! He abandoned us. Steve’s gone. You can’t hold on to him anymore. You don’t have to do anything Steve did. You have nothing to prove to me, I promise. I don’t need you to replace Steve. I need you, Buck. You’re the one that’s here with me, not Steve.”

Tears threaten to spill over your cheeks and you look away from him. The silence is deafening and Bucky moves to take you in his arms. He holds you against his chest and cards his fingers through your hair. You cry against his chest and cling to his henley. He gently guides you to the bed and sits down with you in his lap.

“I’m sorry, honey,” he whispered, rubbing your back. “You’re right. It just scared me. I don’t think I can handle losing you too. I’m sorry.”

You pull away to look at him with your tear stained cheeks and he carefully wipes away your tears with the pad of his thumb. You blink away the remaining tears and lean into his touch. “It’s okay, Buck. You can’t get rid of me that easily.” 

You rest your forehead against his and breathe him in. His metal hand rubs circles against your back and it sends shivers down your spine. He holds you carefully and no words are exchanged. Your eyes flicker to his lips and your heart thunders against your chest. 

There’s a soft knock at the door and you pull your body off of Bucky’s. You sit beside him as Sam pokes his head inside the room. “Is everything okay?” he asked, looking between the two of you. 

You look over at Bucky and then back to Sam. You smile and nod slowly. “Everything’s perfect, Sam.”

[itsallyscorner]

Bring Me Back

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Summary: Filming “Cherry” had its ups and downs for Tom. When filming finally takes its toll on him, you’re there to instantly bring him back from the world of Cherry.

Warnings: Mentions of drug abuse, PTSD, murder. A smidge of smut.

A/n: In honor of the Cherry🍒 trailer dropping, I decided to write this!

(GIF creds: @atealiers )

Any kind of project was a blessing to Tom. He loved being an actor. He was fond of telling stories through the big screen and got a kick from portraying many different characters. Acting was something he felt passionate about, it was his craft and he was very dedicated when it came to becoming his roles. Cherry was quite different from the other movies he’s been in. It was dark and contained many subjects like drug addiction, PTSD, and crime. The world of Cherry was something Tom was not used to; it was twisted. He hasn’t been exposed to things like drugs or the events that Nico Walker had been through. Which was why he was hesitant to take on the role of Cherry.

When the Russo Brothers approached him with the idea, he was excited. He was getting the opportunity to tell another story and would explore the world of a new character. Though the more he looked into it, he realized that maybe he wasn’t up for the role. Was he really ready to dive into the dark and traumatizing life of Nico Walker? As an actor, he was willing to take the job, it would give him an opportunity to expand his career and would possibly be one of his best work. As Tom, he wasn’t sure if he could handle learning or re-enacting the events that occurred in Cherry. But Tom did like a challenge, which was why he ended up agreeing to become Cherry.

He prepared himself mentally and physically pre- production. For research, he interviewed army veterans and former drug addicts to get an idea of what it was like to be in those positions. To get the look of Cherry, he did a variety of things. For example, going on a diet and losing weight, then gaining said weight again once they had to shoot the army scenes. Another thing he did was shave off the gorgeous brown curls that adorned his head. At first you weren’t too happy with his change in hairstyle, but later on you found yourself running your hands along the short strands of hair, loving the fuzzy feeling it gave your palms.

After the interviews and hearing others’ experience, Tom felt a level of responsibility to tell the story of millions of people around the world. Not only was it telling the story of Nico, but of other army veterans who suffered from PTSD and people who’ve had drug addictions. He was fully on board now and there was no looking back. He was going to push himself to the limit and to places he’s never been before.

Filming was tough. There were scenes he had to do that were so unlike him, that felt wrong, and sometimes he just had to take a step back. They didn’t feel right, but it was nothing he couldn’t handle. This was his job, if he wanted this movie to be the best that it can, he was going to commit. Thankfully, he was working with the Russos, who he’s known for a while now. He was familiar with the two and they were patient with him, giving him the time to regain himself before shooting an intense scene. The cast and crew were very understanding as well, creating a safe space for him on set. Having Harry along with him helped as well, the familiarity of his brother kept him grounded and avoided him from falling into the void of Cherry. Though he had all these supportive people around him, there was only one person who could calm him down when things got suffocating on set. The only person he wanted to be in Cleveland with him but wasn’t. You. Since you had your own life and job, you were unable to fly out to Cleveland with him. Instead you stayed at your shared home with Tessa as company. All he needed was you when he felt the affects of Cherry caging in on him. Just the sound of your comforting voice over the phone could clear his head and make him breath again.

He had his bad days on set, where he would have to take a moment and hide in his trailer for a few minutes. During those few minutes he liked to be alone as he waited for you to answer your phone. The line would ring, it’d stop, then the sound of your sweet voice would be the only thing he’d hear. Sometimes you didn’t answer the first time, but nonetheless you answered eventually. It wasn’t the same as having you with him in person, you had your responsibilities, and he understood that. He just wished that one day you’d come to Cleveland. He wanted to be in your arms, stuff his face into your neck, breath in your familiar scent, he just wanted to feel you. You were his home. His safe haven. And it was all he wanted right now.

•

Glancing at your phone, you wondered why Tom hasn’t texted you yet. Not that you were itching for him to text you, but because around this time he would be blowing up your phone telling you things that happened during filming or how his day was going. You decided that filming probably went into overtime making him busy during his break. You shrug to yourself and continue working on your laptop.

You hear the sound of Tessa’s nails clicking against the floors as she enters the office of your home. You greet her with a smile as she settles herself beside your legs.

“Is it dinner time already, Tess?” You scratch her head as you glance at the time on your screen. It was currently nine at night, a bit late for dinner, but you haven’t noticed.

“Just give me five more minutes and I’ll get us dinner. How does that sound, love?” A somewhat sound of approval emits from Tessa. You get back to work, fingers typing away as you finish off the last of your work.

You finish in four minutes, finally satisfied with your work. You let out a content sigh and turn your laptop off. When you get up you stretch and let your bones crack after being in the same position for hours. Tessa joins you, stretching out her front paws then shaking her body out. You chuckle as you lead the way to the kitchen. Taking the scoop for Tessa’s kibble, you fill her bowl up, causing the dog to look up in curiosity. Once you placed the bowl down, her tail wagged wildly as she stuffed her face into her food.

You decided on going for something simple, ramen noodles. You were too tired too cook anything and ramen noodles were the quickest thing to cook in your pantry. While you waited for the noodles to heat up you checked your phone. You went through your notifications, but there were still no texts from Tom. Though you were concerned, you assumed that they had a long shooting day, making him too busy to text. 

Hi love! I hope you’re doing well in Cleveland. I know you’re probably busy, but hopefully filming isn’t tiring you out too much. Have an amazing day! Don’t forget to drink some water from time to time and eat :) Tess and I miss you and love you so much! Talk soon xxx

You send the text with a smile. He won’t read it till he was free or done with filming, but you knew he’d see the message while you were asleep.

The microwave beeps, letting you know that your food was done. You end your night catching up on episodes of New Girl and eating soup. When you were done you did your nightly routine and settled in bed. You turn the lights off and snuggled under the warm sheets.

“Night Tessa.” You whisper to her. A huff comes out of her as she makes herself comfortable on the foot of your bed. When the both of you were settled, you slowly drifted off to sleep.

Buzz

Buzz

The harsh vibrations of your phone shook you awake. Desperate for sleep, you blindly grab your phone and turn it off. Silence fills the room again as you turn around to stuff your face into Tom’s pillow. You were slowly drifting back to sleep when your phone began to vibrate again. With a groan you stretch back and snatch for phone off the night stand. You don’t bother looking at the caller id.

“Hello?” Your voice rasps out.

“Thank God you answered.” The person on the other line said. “I know you’re busy, but how soon can you visit Cleveland?” The deep voice was belonged to Harry.

“Uh—I’m not too sure, I’ll need to check in with my boss.” You reply. When you start feeling more awake you become curious as to why Harry can be calling you. “Why? Is everything ok? How’s Tom? I haven’t heard from him all day.”

The younger Holland sighs. He takes a moment to answer your questions making you suffer in silence, wondering what could have happened to your boyfriend. “Um, they’ve been shooting some intense scenes lately. Tom’s been trying his best but everyone’s noticed that he’s been a bit different.”

You sit up in bed feeling more awake. “What do you mean by different, Haz?”

“Well he’s snapped at the Russos quite a few times. There was this one scene, that they shot multiple times, and Tom would just break down after every one. (Y/n), I’m concerned for my brother, I don’t know what else to do. He’s locked himself in his room after every shoot. A—and I don’t know. I’ve tried to tell him that he can talk to me but he wouldn’t.” Harry explained, his voice croaked. You heart felt heavy for him. Harry was always there for his older brother, so to see him feel so helpless made you feel sorry.

“Haz, calm down, you know how your brother can get. How long has this been happening?”

Harry sniffed over the phone, “About a few weeks now. It’s only started becoming worse last week and now.”

The concern you felt for Tom grew. From what he’s been texting you, filming had been going great. He appeared happy on your FaceTime calls and sounded like his usual self. But maybe he actually wasn’t.

“Harry everything’s gonna be fine, alright?” You assure him. “I’ll call my boss first thing in the morning and when I get the ‘ok’ to leave I’ll get the first flight out to Cleveland. How’s that sound?”

“It sounds good. Can you tell me if you can make it? I’ll have someone come with me to pick you up at the airport.” His voice is quiet, almost muffled.

“Yeah I will, don’t worry.”

“Ok, thank you (y/n).” A small smile forms on your lips. You rub the sleep out your eyes as you glance at your closet. “Alright Haz, I’m gonna go now. But if there’s anything else, just text me or call.”

“I know, stay safe (y/n).” You bid him goodbye and place your phone on the empty space beside your side of the bed. Tom’s side of the bed. You bite your lip in thought as you worry about your boyfriend. You knew he was doing almost everything he can to make sure the movie came out perfect. If that meant shredding himself emotionally and physically, he was going to do it. Tom was dedicated to his work, but he’s never done anything close to Cherry, making you worried about the thoughts that could possibly be going through your lover’s head.

Tessa, who’s now woken up, waddles closer to you, sensing your uneasiness. You appreciate the dog’s gesture and pull her into your side, resting your chin on her head. You were basically sleepless the whole night. Although you haven’t emailed your boss yet, you already had a suitcase packed of your clothes. Your passport and other important belongings were already in a bag, ready to leave London.

The morning had been hectic. You’ve managed to get two hours of sleep, waking up at six in the morning. Still in bed, you sent your boss an email about a family emergency and how you needed to be out of the country for at least a week. As if the gods above knew of your situation, your boss willingly let you go, no questions asked and gave you well wishes. With that out the way, you scowered the Internet for flights to Cleveland. Luck was on your side that morning because you’ve booked a flight that took off in the afternoon. With your bags packed, you drove to Nikki and Dom’s to drop off Tessa.

Now all checked in, you were at Heathrow Airport waiting to be called for your flight. You were sat at your gate, with an iced coffee and a croissant from Starbucks, texting Harry. The two of you were discussing the time you’d arrive and how he’d pick you up. When you were both in agreement, you two decided to catch up. He had been in Tom’s trailer eating his breakfast. An hour passes and you were being called to board the plane.

You settle in your seat, but your leg bounced in anticipation. After the things Harry told you, you just wanted to have your boyfriend in your arms. You knew everything was probably getting to his head, all you wanted to do was hold him and tell him that he was going to be ok. As the plane began to take off, your lack of sleep caught up on you. Throughout the whole flight, you slept soundly, the worries of Tom subsiding for the time being.

~🛬~

The plane lands in Cleveland safely. It was night when you arrived. With your bags, you looked around the airport for a familiar curly haired boy. Harry waves wildly at you before running and pulling you into a tight hug. You laugh wrapping your arms around the slender boy.

“How’s your day been, Haz?” You ruffle his hair as he rolls your suitcase to the parking lot. He shrugs, “The usual. Was on set with Tom, ran around and got things for him, nothing much happened honestly. But you’re here now, so this is the highlight of my night.”

The two of you approach a black car with a driver inside, Harry motions for him to unlock the trunk. He lifts your case in before the two of you get into the backseat.

“How was your flight?” Harry asks you. The car began to move, exiting the airport and entering the highway.

“I slept through all of it, I don’t remember a thing about the flight besides getting on and off it.” You chuckle, leaning your head back against the headrest.

Harry nudges your shoulder, “Thanks for coming out with such short notice.” You wave him off. “It’s no worries, anything for my boys.”

The car is quiet, the only sounds that could be heard is the car’s wheels against the pavement. You turn to Harry, “How was he today?”

“He was pretty good in the morning.” Harry started. “Then filming started and he would grow frustrated after a few scenes. His temper’s been short. He snapped at me during lunch, which is normal, but I just asked him if he wanted some water. He broke down after a certain scene today, I tried talking to him but he still wouldn’t open up about it.” Tom wasn’t too open about his feelings sometimes. He struggled to voice them at times making all his frustrations and feelings bottled up in his head.

Half an hour later and you guys arrive at Tom’s rented home in Atlanta. As soon as you opened the door, you felt the heavy atmosphere. It was somber and tense, the chilliness of the weather also felt inside the house. Harry gestures up the stairs, “Don’t worry, go see him. His room is the first door on the left.”

You quietly thank him and climb up the stairs. You find his door, taking a deep breath before knocking. You hear some shuffling behind the door, “Harry I’m fine! Leave me alone!” His voice was deep, a bit scratchy. You frown at the door.

“Tom?” The room falls quiet. Suddenly you hear fumbling and the sound of heavy footsteps behind the door. The door opens and you finally see him. He was dressed in a large shirt with sweatpants. He looked tired, dark circles under his eyes, eyes glassy, and chapped lips.

“(Y/n)? You’re here?” He asks you in disbelief. A tight lipped grin forms on your lips.

“Yeah, Har—“ You were going to explain how you got there but he immediately threw himself at you. His arms wrap tightly around your figure, his head dipped into your neck, pulling your closer into him. One of your arms go around his neck while the other rubs his back soothingly. A whimper bubbles out of him, his shoulders beginning to shake. You managed to shuffle the both of you back into his room, closing the door behind you.

“You’re ok.” You whisper into his ear, pressing a kiss to the side of his neck. His grip around you never falters. Though he was much taller than you, he seemed so small at the moment. His body drowned in the shirt he wore, making him look thinner. You feel tears soaking into your shirt, making your heart clench in pain. You rest your forehead against his shoulder, holding and whispering sweet nothings into his ear until he was ready to speak.

A few minutes pass until his removes his head from your neck. You frown at his tear stained face, his eyes and cheeks red from quietly sobbing into your shoulder. Your hands cup his face, wiping the trails of tears on his cheeks. Tom leans closer to your touch, his eyes shut while his lips kiss your palm.

“I’m sorry, you’re probably tired from the flight.” He apologizes but you shake your head. You lead him to his bed and sit against the headboard. Tom follows in suit, desperately trying to get closer to you. His arms wrap around your torso, his head rests on your chest, while your legs tangle themselves together.

“I’ve had plenty of sleep on the flight, how are you?” Your lips are against his short hair from holding him so close. You nails scratch softly at his hair, calming him down.

“I don’t know if I could finish it.” He quietly admits. He shakes his head at himself.

“Why’s that, Tom?” Your boyfriend takes a deep breath as he sits up, removing himself from your touch. He sits across from you with legs crossed as he holds his head in his hands.

“I—I, it’s too much. There’s so much fucked up things he’s done. And all the things he’s seen. I just—sometimes I feel like it’s me who’s committed all of those things. When we shoot the scenes in the war and when I had to do drugs and rob banks, I felt like I lost myself—“ He cries interrupting himself to take a breath in. Compared to your fingers that ran gently through his hair, his clawed at his head. His palms rub harshly at his face, turning his skin a bright tint of red. To see Tom in such pain made you sad. You hated seeing him like this.

You gently remove his hands from scratching at his face and hold them in his lap. He stares down at your hands, clinging onto them as if his life depended on it. “I get lost in the character sometimes and I have to pull myself out of it to bring me back. But it keeps on happening over and over again. Then the Russos kept telling me to reshoot the scene more like Cherry, and I lost it and yelled at them.” You feel his tears fall to your your hands, making tears well up in your own eyes. You shuffle closer to him and kiss his forehead before pulling him into you. You stay quiet, letting him get whatever he wanted to get out.

Tom’s face is against your shoulder again. He sniffs before continuing, “It’s like everyday I find something he and I have in common. Then I think that maybe I’m turning into him. I don’t want him to be part of me. (Y/n), I don’t want to be him, I don’t want to do the things he’s done.” He sobs into your shoulder. Your heart breaks at how broken he sounded. His shoulders shook again, his back burning up with tension. A few tears made it’s way down your cheeks as you pulled his face away from you.

“Look at me.” You urged him. His jaw clenched, still looking down at his lap. He shook his head in response. “Tom, please. Look at me.” Your voice cracks. He slowly tilts his head up, your eyes connecting. He didn’t have that twinkle in his eyes, it’s like they’ve lost the light in them. Instead they were dark, like there was no life behind them. There was a mix of sadness, confusion, and even fear in his eyes.

You sadly smiled at him, cupping his face with your hands. “You’re not going to be him. You never will. You’re Tom. You are nothing close to Nico or Cherry. You are the sweetest man I have known in the world, you wouldn’t even hurt a damn fly. You’re not him. I know you aren’t. You wouldn’t do the things he’s ever done even if you were forced to. I know you Tom, I assure you, you’re nothing like him.” Tom hiccups, gripping onto your wrists.

“When this is all over and you’re done filming, we can forget about him. We won’t even mention him.” You assure him, stroking his cheeks.

“What if—,” You cut him off.

“No, there’s no what if’s. You’re going to be fine Tom. You’re surrounded by people who love you and will make you realize that you’re nothing even near him. You are the kindest man ever, you love your family, you care about your fans, and your brothers. You’re busy always taking care of everyone else, I think it’s time you take care of yourself, love.” You tell him. A small smile is on your face but it falters, “You don’t have to go through this alone, Tom.”

Tom takes a shaky breath in. “You’ll be there right?” He asks like a child making sure his mother will be there when he wakes up. “You’ll be there with me to bring me back?”

Your thumb smooths the crinkle between his brows, “I always will. I promise.” He nods and pulls you into him. You climb onto his lap and settle on his legs. He stares up at you, one of his his hands supporting your back, the other pressed against your cheek. “Thank you. I missed you so much. I’m sorry for not texting, everything’s just been so taxing mentally and physically.”

“No, don’t worry I get it.” You turn your face to press a light kiss on his palm. For the first time since you’ve seen him, Tom managed to crack a smile on his lips. He moves some strands of hair away from your face before resting his large hand on the back of your head. “I love you. I love you so much, (y/n).”

“I love you too, Tom.” You whisper against his lips. He takes that as a sign to finally crash your lips together. After months being apart, the feeling of his lips against yours felt like coming home. The kiss was desperate, like it was the air you both breathed. Tom had been longing for your touch, he craved you every second of the day, whether it be sexually or just missing you. The kiss grew rough, your teeth clashing, tongues poking and gliding against each other.

Tom lays you down on the bed, hovering over you. His hands grab and stroke at your body, trying to pull off your clothes to get close to your skin. He suddenly pulls away from your lips. “I need you. Please, I need you.” He almost begs you. Panting, you nod and push him to lay on his back. “Ok, let me take care of you, Tommy.”

He yanks his shirt off, throwing it to the side. You do the same, leaning down to meet his lips again. You kiss your way along his jaw and down to his neck. When you find that certain spot, he lets out a throaty groan, head falling back against the pillows. You run your nails along his chiseled abs and slightly roll your hips against his growing length. Tom grunts, hands instantly connecting to your ass and gripping onto your cheeks. He helps you roll your hips more, deeper with more friction against you two.

“Mm, Tom. I missed you.” You moan against his neck. You bite down and soothe the spot with your tongue after.

Tom looks down at you, lifting his hips to meet your clothes pussy. “Fucking miss you so much. You have no idea how much I’ve been dreaming of being buried in you again.” You kiss your way down his chest, but Tom stops you. His hands grab onto your leggings and slide them off.

“N-no foreplay. I need to feel you.” He stutters out, mouth agape. You nod in agreement and take his sweatpants off along with his boxers. You spit in your hand, running your hand along his dick to give it some wetness. Tom helps you lift yourself over him and guides your hips down his erected cock. You let out a combination of a sigh and moan as your walls envelop and stretch around him. Tom slightly sits up against the headboard, your tightness wrapping around him. He lets out a cry of relief, your walls around him feeding his cravings. You use his shoulders as leverage to pull yourself up but Tom stops you.

“What’s wrong?” You eye him cautiously. Tom shakes his head, “Nothing’s wrong. I just—can we stay like this for a while? I just want to feel you, please?”

“Yeah, we can do that.” You send him a reassuring smile as you settle back down on him. His hands make themselves comfortable around your waist. You maneuver your arms under his and wrap them around his back. Tom smiles at you, rubbing your back and guiding you into his chest. Before you can nuzzle your face into his neck, he presses a kiss to your temple and lets his fingers get tangled in your hair.

With his eyes closed in bliss, he whispers, “Thank you for bringing me back. I love you.”

You kiss his collarbone basking in the feeling him being so close to you. “I’ll always be here. I love you too.”

[starlessea]

𝐅𝐨𝐱𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐑𝐚𝐛𝐛𝐢𝐭 𝐓𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐥𝐬 - Part 1

A/N This is part 1/2 of a collab with the amazing @whitexwingedxdoves​​! The first part is in Daryl’s POV, and the second will be in the reader’s. Part 2 is here.

Summary: Daryl Dixon was a good hunter, but there were still some things that he struggled to find. Such as the patience to deal with you.

You wore a rabbit’s foot keyring, but Daryl thought you were the furthest thing from lucky. After all, you ended up stuck with him, too.

Words: 3974

Daryl never really expected Judith to take an interest in hunting; she was far too sweet.

But then again, so were you - and Daryl had never met anyone who could make a better twitch-up snare. Though, he preferred using bow traps, himself, when he had the arrows to spare for them.

Takes more skill, he’d argue, and watch you shake your head vehemently at him - as though you couldn’t disagree more.

You hadn’t changed since then; you were just as stubborn, if not worse. But Daryl definitely had, even if he didn’t want to admit it. You had changed him. He wasn’t the same man who’d first stumbled through the gates of Alexandria all those years back, scowling at your traps which got in his way and stole his game; nor was he the same person who insisted on butting heads with you until he got a migraine.

Daryl Dixon had grown since then.

And that was probably the reason why he was stuck crawling through the forest on all fours, teaching Judith Grimes how to set a twitch-up snare (and not a bow trap).

“Now what?” she asked him, adjusting that sheriff’s hat which was still a little too big for her.

Daryl could remember the first time he’d placed it on her head, and tipped it up to get a glimpse of her gummy smile. She’d been so small back then; she still was.

He held out his rope in front of him, weaving it slowly so that she could follow the steps. It felt natural to Daryl’s hands, like he’d done it a thousand times over. He probably had, but he could remember a time where he’d been the student - and you were his teacher.

“Make the ears an’ weave the end through ‘em,” he instructed.

Just like a rabbit, you’d told him, and laughed.

He felt his lips twitch a little, but Daryl bit back his smile. Instead, he watched as Judith made a mistake - and he let her. That was the best way to learn, after all.

The young girl pulled a face at the tangled rope in her fists, wondering where she’d gone wrong. Then, she looked up at her uncle Daryl for the answers.

“It doesn’t look right,” she noted, showing it to him.

It didn’t. It definitely looked more like a dog with stubby ears than a rabbit.

Daryl shook his head gently, confirming her suspicions. “Give it here,” he mumbled, and carefully took the half-formed knot into his lap.

Judith shuffled over to get a closer look, and Daryl took his time in showing her how to correct it. He remembered when his father and brother would try and ‘teach’ him something new - which usually involved berating him until he was too anxious to ever mess it up again.

He hoped he was a better teacher than that.

“Ya folded it wrong,” he explained, pointing to that part of the fraying rope. He unwove it, and tucked it back into the right place. “See, ya fold the loop over itself to make the ears.”

Judith watched intently, holding her breath as she tried to memorise the steps. Then, Daryl undid the rope, and she let out a yell in protest. But Daryl just shrugged, and smiled a little to himself. She’d need to figure it out on her own if she was going to learn - as much as he wished he’d always be there to help her.

Daryl handed the rope back, and watched as she fumbled with it again; but this time, she didn’t make the same mistake.

“Who taught you how to do this?” she asked, eyes still trained in her lap as she spoke.

Daryl was silent for a few seconds, as if debating whether to tell her. He could already picture the triumphant look on your face.

He sighed. “This knot? Your aunt did.”

His words came out muffled, but Judith was still able to decipher them. In response, she smiled a smile that looked much too familiar - reminding him of another Grimes kid when he was up to no good.

“I thought you knew how to hunt before that,” she chirped, purposefully not meeting Daryl’s eyes as he narrowed them at her.

Damn girl’s gettin’ cheeky, he thought.

And this time, he didn’t pull her up on her mistake. Maybe she deserved to do the knot over once more.

“Mhm. I did,” Daryl answered naturally, as though her teasing tone didn’t bother him in the slightest. “Jus’ hunted in a different way is all.”

Judith looked up at him, and cocked her head to the side.

Yeah, he thought, she’s growin’ up jus’ like Carl.

“Which way’s better?” she asked curiously, as though forgetting the messy knot in her lap.

Daryl sat back on his hands, feeling his palms meet the damp leaves of the thick, forest overgrowth. That question had been the one that started it all. The sky was beginning to darken, and he knew that he should be getting back home soon. You always did give him one hell of an ear-full whenever he was late.

He smiled at the girl, before nodding in the direction of the abandoned knot - prompting her to try again.

“Depends on who ya ask.”

Daryl let loose his arrow and listened to it whirr through the air, and strike that possum straight down from its tree. Carol grimaced as he collected it, picking the animal up by its tail and slinging it over his shoulder as they walked. He would have made some remark back at her - but he just didn’t have the energy.

None of them did, really.

That’s why he’d shot the possum. He still wasn’t convinced by the promised land that Aaron had tried to sell to them - a place called Alexandria - so at least they’d have something to eat if it fell through.

It usually always did.

Every time Daryl felt like he had a solid footing on the ground beneath him, it somehow always managed to find a way to cave. First there was the farm, then the prison, and finally Terminas. These days, he just couldn’t catch a break.

But he could catch possum, he thought, and trudged on along the road.

The gates to Alexandria reminded him of the prison - those wire lattice fences and the metal bars that stretched up to the sky. It was like a damn cage, but Daryl had somehow gotten used to living in those.

What he could never get used to was the sight of those faces, looking down on him as though he was something they’d stepped in whilst navigating the side-walk. He was familiar with those looks by now - he’d gotten plenty of them back in Georgia even before the world had ended - but they never failed to make him feel a certain shame he didn’t like to admit to.

This time, though, he may have deserved them.

It took him a while to realise that their eyes weren’t actually on him, but rather lingering on that dead possum - still hanging by its tail. Then a woman stepped forward, with an air about her that made Daryl think that she was the leader. Although, it definitely wasn’t the same air he felt when he was around Rick.

“We’ll need to interview you, so that we can assign you all jobs,” she said warmly.

And Daryl laughed a bitter laugh he didn’t realise he’d been holding back - but once he let it out, he felt much better. From the moment he’d stepped foot into Alexandria, Daryl Dixon already had a job.

It was to try and keep the rest of these idiots alive.

Deanna’s office was stuffy; with too many dusty books and not enough fresh air, it nearly made Daryl forget how to breathe. He’d almost knocked that camera straight from its tripod, too - until Rick shot him a warning look against it.

“He’s a hunter and a damn good one,” the man quickly interjected, his hands falling into place on his hips.

Daryl lifted his chin with pride at the sheriff’s words. Hunting was the one thing he could confidently offer to the group; it was second nature to him. He could also tell that Deanna held Rick in high regard, so to hear him praise Daryl like that only proved his worth.

But she remained skeptical. “I can see that, but we already have one of those.”

The woman was assertive, that’s for sure.

She crossed her arms at her chest and examined the limp possum that swung proudly from Daryl’s shoulder. Though, she didn’t seem to share that same enthusiasm for his skill. Daryl shuffled on his feet, and repositioned the possum on his shoulder as if trying to shake off her judgemental looks.

“Just the one?” Carol piped up, from the doorway.

She had a good point; only one hunter for the whole of Alexandria?

It didn’t seem to add up quite right in Daryl’s head - and from the look on his face, it didn’t convince Rick, either.

“We’ve never needed more than that.” Deanna replied curtly, her lips pursing into a tight line. Daryl couldn’t help but scowl at the pride in her voice.

Bullshit, he thought.

“Well if you ask me, you’d be making a mistake not giving him that title,” Rick cautioned, but again his words seemed to be lost on the woman standing before them.

Deanna shook her head. “No, that’s not all he has to offer,” she said quietly.

Daryl felt a chill wrack up his spine as she stared right through him - as if trying to figure him out.

“I’ll find a job for you, but in the meantime feel free to join our hunter,” she continued, decisively.

Daryl tried his best not to scowl. Perhaps he would do just that, and show Alexandria what they were missing without having him hunt for them.

Maybe he’d even bring back a feast.

The interviews took up a hefty while, but Daryl promised Rick he would accompany him on a perimeter check whilst it was still light out - before the rest of the group settled down for the night. Even with those tall fences, he wanted to make sure there were no cracks - inside or out - for walkers to slip through.

The interior of Alexandria seemed secure, but beyond those sturdy gates was a world they hadn’t accounted for. Daryl toed each steel beam with his boot, as Rick started to dispatch the undead stragglers that lingered a little too close.

A regular culling, he called it.

They’d tried to implement that at the prison, too, but their defences had been only a tenth as sturdy as Alexandria’s. So, Daryl helped the officer, aiming his crossbow at the walkers nearby - even the ones that were caught on car doors, trapped.

He even went out of his way to follow the footsteps he came across, left so blatantly that they disturbed the mud and leaves - allowing him to track them clear as day. Rick accompanied him, knife in hand and pistol still holstered on his belt.

Then, a twig snapped.

“Son of a-” the officer cursed, and Daryl whipped his head back.

There was rope caught around his boot, and it only tightened the more he tried to twitch his foot free.

“The hell is that?” Rick cursed, looking over at him for an answer.

Tha’s a damn snare, Daryl realised, and pulled out his pocket knife to cut the other man loose.

He narrowed his eyes; it was constructed well. The knots were tight and the trigger reacted as it should have. But it still wasn’t as efficient as the types of traps Daryl used.

“Damn twitch-up, nothin’ but trouble,” he replied, crouching down to free Rick’s boot, “don’t catch nothin’.”

But a voice retorted just as quick.

“Caught your friend just fine!”

Daryl flinched, and dropped the knife in favour of the crossbow slung over his back. He hadn’t even heard her. He trained his weapon on the woman, but soon lowered it at the sight of her - unarmed.

“Would appreciate if you removed your dumb foot from my trap,” she yelled, pointing to Rick’s combat boot - still floundering in the rope like a fish on a line.

Daryl sighed. So this was Alexandria’s hunter.

She carried a big leather satchel, and had a string of woven rope circled over her shoulder. Daryl also noticed the charm hanging from her bag - a tattered rabbit’s foot. It was appropriate, that’s for sure. But he wondered how she’d even been able to catch one with such temperamental traps.

Daryl bent down near the twitch-up again. He knew how to disable it, but Rick had already damaged some parts with his heavy steps as he struggled to get it loose. So, he just glanced back at the woman over his shoulder, and made a show of cutting through the rope with his pocket blade.

“Ain’t worth the hassle,” he muttered, once he was done.

He could tell from her face that she wasn’t impressed. She stalked over to him and shot them both a look so fierce that Daryl thought her eyes might roll back into her head.

“And who the hell are you?” she asked - but it was more of a demand.

Daryl had heard enough of that tone today. He was already sick of the false authority Alexandria had exuded over them. So, he ignored her question.

He pointed at the ruined trap, instead. “If officer clumsy over ‘ere broke yer trap in two seconds, then walkers could spring it in one,” Daryl remarked.

The woman scoffed, crouching down to retrieve the rope.

“Maybe that’s the point,” she snapped back, “keeps them away from the fences.”

You’re lying, Daryl thought. It seemed like everyone around here had too much damn pride.

“Nah it aint,” he argued, shaking his head. “Tha’s what them car doors were for.”

He’d noticed it earlier - the way the vehicles were all parked along the perimeter of Alexandria, doors wide open and windows down to bait the walkers and snag them there. They weren’t perfect, though, since a few had still slipped through.

The woman went silent, and Daryl felt a small smile tug at his lips as he watched for her reaction.

“Yer tryna catch rabbits with these,” he concluded.

He’d expected her to admit defeat - maybe even ask for his help since it was clear he knew what he was talking about.

But, she didn’t.

The hunter shook her head straight back at him, and flipped open that worn leather satchel - pulling out a rabbit by its foot.

“Not just trying,” she corrected, with a smirk much more full than the one Daryl had dared to wear.

Rick let out a sound under his breath, but he still heard it. Daryl scowled in return. There were still plenty of traps better than that old-fashion twitch-up.

“Ya coulda caught more with-” he started, but she cut him off.

“Just who’d you think you are, again?”

This took Daryl aback, and he was stunned into silence. Already, he couldn’t stand the arrogance of these people. His jaw clenched, and Rick seemed to pick up on the unsettling quietness. So, the man cleared his throat and stepped forward.

“This is Daryl,” he announced, clapping his hand down onto his shoulder. “Best hunter I know.”

The woman wordlessly stuffed the rabbit back into her bag, leaving its ears to flop out over the side. Then, she looked between him and the officer, with an expression that got completely under Daryl’s skin.

“Well then I guess you only know one,” she laughed.

Daryl couldn’t quite remember how the rest of the story went. Over time, the details became as hazed in his mind as the sight of freshly fallen snow - obscuring any tracks he might try to follow. The only thing he could briefly recall was the different animals they had hunted during their time at Alexandria.

Yes, he could remember it now.

After that first rabbit, there had been a fox - caught right in the dead of winter.

“Should have guessed you were a bowman!”

Daryl sighed and stopped in his tracks. For someone so bothersome, that woman was remarkably quiet.

He picked up the red fox, which looked more of a gingerish colour against the snow, and twisted his arrow until it became dislodged from its side. A few blood spatters trickled out onto the ground, landing in perfect circles - like red wax seals against white paper.

“Gets the job done quick and easy,” Daryl grumbled, slinging the fox over his shoulder by its bushy tail.

The woman watched him, leant up against a tree with her arms crossed over her chest.

“Oh now you’re starting to sound like my dad!” she laughed, and padded along after Daryl as he turned to leave.

Recently, the two hunters would sometimes run into each other like this - and Daryl had started to expect the company.

“Ya ol’ man teach you those god awful traps?” he rasped, his voice coming out as puffs of smoke in the cool air.

The woman jabbed him in his side, and Daryl scowled.

“No, actually that was my uncle,” she corrected, looking down at her feet as they made imprints in the snow.

Daryl glanced over at the woman, and narrowed his eyes. He just couldn’t figure her out yet.

“Ya whole damn family hunters?” he questioned, and she laughed again.

For someone so stuck up, her laugh was shy. - as though she were scared of it.

She nodded. “Some girls got Barbies for Christmas. I got a boning knife.”

And some kids got nothin’, Daryl thought.

They walked together back to Alexandria, mostly in silence - save from the crunching of their boots as they stepped heavily through the snow. Daryl kept catching that rabbit foot charm in his peripheral, swinging from the woman’s satchel as she stepped. He also noticed just how red her nose had gotten, and how it occasionally twitched from the cold.

“What ya doin’ out ‘ere?” Daryl eventually asked. “Too cold for rabbits,” he remarked.

They reached the gates, and the woman stopped as she waited for the guard to open them.

“Was tracking a fox,” she replied, eyes settling on the reddish fur bunched up between Daryl’s fingers. “But it looks like you beat me to it.”

After that, once the snow thawed and spring had come around, the next hunt had been for a deer - and Daryl was called upon to help her carry it back.

Thought they only needed one hunter, Daryl cursed, as he readjusted the deer’s hooves in his grip.

He could have easily carried the animal himself, but she was stubborn and insisted she share the weight. He watched as she struggled to hold the back end of the deer, propping it up every so often to relieve the strain on her arms - that damn rabbit’s foot flailing about from her satchel.

“Why the rabbit’s foot?” Daryl finally spoke, breaking the silence between her exaggerated grunts.

“It’s lucky” she managed to huff, before admitting defeat and letting her end drop to the floor.

Daryl took that as his cue to pick the deer up himself, and sling it around the back of his neck. He couldn’t help but let the corners of his mouth twitch into a smirk at her disappointed stance - but he knew better than to say anything.

“Didn’t you keep the brush?”

Daryl cocked his brow at her question, taking slow steps back towards Alexandria.

“You know the fox’s tail?” she finally cleared up, matching his speed.

“Why? They lucky too?” he quipped back.

He didn’t intend for it to sound so sarcastic.

“I don’t think so,” she sighed, “but they’re pretty!” A small giggle passed her lips, which only made Daryl roll his eyes

This was Alexandria’s big scary hunter.

“Could swap it out for that damn rag you take everywhere,” she teased, nodding her head towards his back pocket.

Daryl watched the way her lips pressed together in a thin line, as if holding back the urge to let out yet another laugh. He scoffed.

Rags were practical; rabbit’s feet and fox’s tails were not.

During the rest of the trip back home, she would go on to tell him the story of how she’d caught that particular rabbit’s foot; it was a story he had since misplaced - but he still remembered the way her eyes lit up as she told it.

Looking back, that deer had been the last thing they’d caught - in Alexandria, at least. Though, Daryl could remember what they had been hunting for when it happened.

Damn rabbits.

The grass was thick and overgrown. Neither of them had explored the area yet - a little ways out from Alexandria. She’d told Daryl about it the night before, claiming to have stumbled upon it in the daytime. The woman swore that she could barely take a step without tripping over one of the dozens of burrows she’d found there.

Daryl wasn’t quite convinced, but he followed her nonetheless.

“You can’t be serious!” she exclaimed, looking over at Daryl much too expressively. “Fox meat? Over rabbit?”

It’s too early for this, Daryl thought, catching sight of her lopsided grin.

“Tastes better,” he mumbled back, navigating through the long foxtail grass and thickets that were up to his waist.

The woman looked over her shoulder and shook her head at him. Daryl reminded her to keep on walking, or let him lead if all she was going to do was trip him up.

She ignored him. “No! Foxes taste like pennies,” she argued, waving her hands around like she had a point to prove. “You know, that weird metallic-”

The woman stopped, and cocked her head at him.

“Don’t look at me like that,” she remarked, and Daryl felt as though he couldn’t even keep up with the conversation.

“I ain’t even lookin’ at ya,” he bit back - frustrated.

Daryl could barely recall how the hunter had gone from being so reserved back when they had first met, to whatever the hell was standing before him now.

Bark worse than ‘er bite, tha’s for damn sure.

She ran on ahead, and Daryl followed her tracks in the long grass until they reached that deserted area - so quiet that it almost unsettled him. There wasn’t even a breeze; it was as though the world was completely still.

Unnaturally so.

“See!” the hunter exclaimed, triumphantly. “I told you, it’s completely untouched.”

She had that same, smug look on her face as she did when he first met her - entirely proud of herself. But for once, it didn’t bother Daryl in the slightest.

He shook his head, but it was more out of habit than anything else. “Won’t be for long,” he chided, “best keep quiet or yer gonna scare ‘way the game.”

The woman laughed at him, less timidly than how she used to.

“I know how-” she started, but Daryl never did find out what she was going to say.

A loud metallic sound rang through the open air, and the hunter disappeared from his sight, as though sucked into the ground beneath her. In a matter of seconds, she’d gone from laughing so carefree to becoming lost in the tall grass - leaving Daryl behind to only listen to her scream.

Daryl knew that sound; he couldn’t mistake the clang of those metal jaws as they clamped shut.

Feedback is always welcomed; I love hearing what you all think - so feel free to comment, send in an ask, or just message me if you want to chat!

Bear trap, he realised, and ran through the foxtails to find her.

Also, if you enjoy my writing, you might want to buy me a coffee or commission me - tips are always appreciated. Thank you for reading!

A/N I really hope you enjoyed reading this. It is one of my favourites so far. And it has truly been a joy working with @whitexwingedxdoves​. Make sure you stay tuned for part 2!

Let me know if you want to be added/removed from the tags!

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[petertingle-yipyip]

SIN MIEDO - BUCKY BARNES (THREE)

EPISODE THREE : POWER BROKER

series tags: @calums-betch​​ // SM masterlist // another madripoor gif bc i loved those scenes

Pairing: Stark!Reader x Bucky Barnes (platonic/flirty)

Word Count: 9,209

Summary: Leaving John Walker in the dust, Y/N had to follow Barnes to a shifty contact. That leads them to Madripoor and an unexpected, and suspicious, ally. Juggling her grief, her control, her own doubts, the pressure of Walker on their tail, and a school girl crush, can she handle the fight?

The next day, the three of you found yourselves in Berlin. You weren’t surprised how easy it was to get through security. Flashing a smile and an ID with Stark on it opened pretty much any door. Surely it had nothing to do with Sam working with the Air Force again.

“Last time I was in Germany, we weren’t on the same side.” You commented nostalgically as you three followed the security guard. “How the tables have turned.”

“I’m gonna go in alone.” Barnes said as you all approached the last corridor.

“Not a chance.” You laughed as Sam said “Why?”

“You’re Avengers..” Barnes reasoned. “You know how he feels about that.”

“It’s not like you two were known for frolicking in the sun together.” Sam mocked.

“He was obsessed with HYDRA. We have a history. Trust me, I got it.” Barnes assured before turning to leave. When Sam didn’t stop him, you did.

Quickly you reached out and grabbed his wrist. You made no effort to pull him back and he didn’t exactly pull away from you. He looked back at you with a stern expression, that he wasn’t going to cave.

“You’re not going alone, Barnes.” You said seriously, tightening your grip on his wrist slightly.

“Y/N-“ He tried.

“No.” You cut in. “I don’t care. I can do this all day.” You offered with a slight smirk.

He chewed the inside of his cheek for a moment before caving. He nodded slightly, his expression betraying that he was slightly impressed. “Fine. Hurry up.” He said, nodding for you to follow.

“Yessir, Sergeant Barnes.” You chuckled as you followed behind Barnes. The comment earned you an eye roll and a scoff, but nothing was said.

“You sure you want to do this?” You checked as you two waited for security to let you in. “I can handle it on my own..”

“I can do it.” He nodded as you approached the cell.

“I’m sure you can.” You shrugged casually. “It was more about if you wanted to.”

You stayed a couple steps behind Barnes, using the shadows to stay mostly out of sight. You didn’t want to talk to Zemo, let alone be in the room. But part of you wanted to make sure that nothing happened. You didn’t know if you could stop Barnes if Zemo triggered the Winter Soldier, but you probably had the best shot.

You watched Barnes’ body language carefully. From your angle, you could see the look on his face. The tension of his shoulders. The hand you could see was in a tight fist. There was a certain fear in his eyes, in the way his jaw clenched. You could tell that a part of him, even if it was a small part, was scared that Zemo would send him back to the Winter Soldier.

Zemo tried the trigger words but earned no reaction from Barnes. You let out a breath of relief and saw Barnes’ shoulders relax as that tension left him. You didn’t doubt that Barnes had control, that his time in Wakanda was enough to rid his mind of HYDRA’s influence, but you also knew Zemo was crafty. You didn’t trust that he didn’t have a couple tricks up his sleeve. But then again… So did you.

“For what it’s worth, I’m sorry.” Zemo said, catching your attention. “It was never personal.”

“Seemed kinda personal.” You muttered to yourself. You were anxious, shifting your weight between your feet. You wondered what Sam was feeling back in the hallway but you couldn’t go back. The tension in your body was begging for a release, seemingly burning it’s way through your skin. There was a crackle of electricity between your fingers, a skill you hardly had a grip on. You only figured out how to use it in quick bursts or it would build itself up in moments of high tension.

“You brought a friend?” Zemo questioned, his eyes turning to you. You sunk deeper into the shadows.

“Someone recreated the super soldier serum.” Barnes said to redirect his attention. There was more control in his tone and it settled something anxious in the pit of your stomach. “I need to find out who.”

“You’re assuming HYDRA has something to do with this.” Zemo said simply, studying Barnes as he spoke. The expression Zemo held, the way he was looking at Barnes like an experiment, tempted you to reveal yourself. Something about it made your skin crawl, but you knew you had to refrain. You needed the info. “Which is why you came to me, which means you’re desperate…” A smug tone laced his voice and made you want to gag. “Lucky for you, and your friend in the shadows, I know where to begin.”

“And in exchange?” You finally spoke, stepping into the small sliver of light and taking your place beside Barnes. “What’s it going to take?”

His sly smile made you instantly regret the question.

Without explaining anything to Sam, you and Barnes led him to a series of tunnels underground. You opted to remain silent through the endeavor, knowing you wouldn’t be able to explain it right. While Sam pestered Barnes about the plan, you were busy finding the best route.

You kept one hand against the concrete wall, tapping your fingers to feel the vibrations. The tunnels were empty save for you three. They lead to a basement where you stopped for Barnes to walk Sam through a “hypothetical”.

“Please tell me this is an actual hypothetical.” Sam looked to you. In the meantime, you were toying with balls of air in your palm. You were balancing on them in a handstand.

“Yeah.” You lied. “It’s a hypothetical.”

Barnes continued to explain everything while you purposefully distracted yourself. You weren’t a huge fan of this plan, but Barnes had a point. Zemo offered a starting point. Walker had nothing. You guys had nothing. Though you’d never admit it, you needed Zemo.

“Speak of the devil.” You commented when you felt his footsteps approaching. You landed back on your feet as Zemo entered the room.

“You’re going back to prison.” Sam insisted.

“If I may-“ Zemo tried.

“No!” Sam and Barnes yelled simultaneously.

“Sorry.” You said with a shrug, bringing your forearms up and slamming them together. The movement called walls of earth to rise and trap Zemo in a thick rock casing. “It’s nothing personal.”

“When Steve refused to sign the Accords, you backed him.” Barnes countered.

“You broke the law and stuck your neck out for him.” You added.

“I distinctly remember you-“ Sam pointed to you. “-were on the other side.”

“My name’s not anywhere on that document.” You corrected. “I was a minor. Wouldn’t have been legally binding.”

“I’m asking you to do it again.” Barnes tried.

“I really think I’m invaluable-“ Zemo began again.

“Shut up!” You groaned, lifting the rock to meet his chin. “I will go all the way up.” You threatened before turning your attention back to the boys. “I’m with Barnes. I know it’s crazy but it’s the best shot we got. And we gotta move fast cause Walker is working on this too.”

“Okay.” Sam agreed finally. You dropped the rock prison and looked to the boys. “You don’t make a move without our permission.”

“Fair.” Zemo nodded.

“Otherwise, you deal with me.” You said simply. His eyebrows raised in interest, a slight challenge glinting in his eyes. You lifted your hand in front of your face, palm to the side. As you lowered your hand, you angled it so your fingertips pointed at Zemo. You saw his muscles tighten as he struggled but gave in to your control and went down to his knees.

“Dad once said the best weapon was the weapon you only had to fire once.” You said as if you were contemplating the words. “Let’s hope he was right.” You released Zemo before Sam spoke up.

“So where do we start?” He asked.

While Zemo was collecting his things from one of the cars, he explained where to start. He mentioned a woman named Selby as a starting point.

“This whole time you were rich?” Sam asked wildly as you approached a private jet.

“I’m a Baron, Sam.” Zemo answered in a matter of fact tone. “My family was royalty until you destroyed my country.”

“Eh.” You shrugged. “The Stark jet is nicer.”

You sat across from Barnes while Sam sat across from Zemo. You weren’t too interested in conversation. You didn’t know where you were going, nor did you really care. The sudden movement of Barnes made you snap to attention.

“If you touch that again, I’ll kill you.” Barnes threatened lowly with a hand at Zemo’s throat.

“At ease, soldier.” You reached over to tug on Barnes’ jacket. After a moment’s hesitation, he came and sat back down.

“I understand that list of names. People you’ve wronged as the Winter Soldier.” Zemo said with a solemn nod. He gestured between you and Barnes. “What I don’t understand is the relationship here. Are you two… involved?”

“Don’t push it.” Barnes muttered angrily as you simply rolled your eyes.

Sam talked about the book, that it used to be Steve’s. He bragged about how he suggested something for Steve to write in it. You remembered you had suggested some things for him to look into too, your favorite had been all the horror movies you got him to add.

Sam and Barnes then bickered about the Troubleman soundtrack, to which Zemo chimed in. You groaned slightly, throwing your head back and staring at the ceiling. The conversation quickly shifted to Steve and super soldiers, mildly peaking your interest.

“Cities fly. Innocent people die.” Zemo carried on.

“You forget who you’re talking to.” You laughed in disbelief.

“Pardon?”

“You’re talking about Sokovia… I was there. And my dad nearly died - yet again - trying to save the world… Trying to fix his mistake but no one cared about that part, right?.”

“Only nearly..” He agreed. “I think it’s fair to say the Avengers, none of you were really innocent.”

“And he actually did die to bring back half the universe so excuse me if I don’t share your bitterness.”

“It seems that you do, Y/N.” He analyzed, watching the response your eyes gave away.

“Shut it.” You rolled your eyes.

Conversation quickly shifted to Madripoor. Zemo and Barnes explained what it’s like, what it was. It sounded like a place out of a book, but given that your career was fighting A.I. powered robots and a giant genocidal purple lunatic, nothing was surprising anymore.

“James, you will have to become someone you claim is gone.” Zemo told Barnes.

A solemn expression came over Barnes. You couldn’t tell if it was regret, remorse, or something else. You leaned forward, resting elbows on your knees. You nodded to motion Barnes to come closer. He leaned forward in the same way.

“You sure you’re okay with this?” You asked quietly. “We can find another way, or we can do this witho-“

“I’m not sitting out.” He cut in. “I’ll be fine. Why do you keep trying to sideline me?”

“You won’t be alone.” You offered genuinely. “Sam and I got your back.”

Later that night, you walked the bridge that led to Madripoor. 

“So who am I supposed to be, exactly?” You asked after Zemo had explained Sam’s character for the night.

“Rosalinda Calvillo Del Santos.” He said, showing you a picture of the girl. “Heiress to a huge cartel ring out of Mexico City.”

“Woah, she’s hot.” You nodded, slightly impressed. “And this dress… Seems like it perfectly matches her style.”

You motioned to the dress you wore. It was a tight, short black silk dress with a 4 inch slit up the right side that showed off your body beautifully. The chest of the dress hung perfectly to keep you covered but still catch attention. The straps were silver jewels in a halter style while additional pieces of thin black silk stretched across your back in a criss cross pattern. 

“She's also a bit sadistic.” Zemo added nonchalantly. “But I’m sure you’ll play that just fine.”

“Fun.” You nodded.

“She kinda does look like you.” Sam commented as he leaned over to see the picture while he adjusted the cuffs of his jacket.

“She can’t be that hot then.” Bucky said sarcastically.

“Oh shut up.” You laughed as you pushed Barnes slightly. “You’re just used to girls in the 40’s and the whole modest look, huh?”

“Yeah yeah.” He rolled his eyes. “You ever gonna retire the old man jokes?”

“Maybe, but you have to admit how good I look.” You countered.

“Not a chance, little lady.” He smiled and shot a wink your way as he opened the car door for you.

“Well, Sergeant Barnes, what a gentleman.” You said sarcastically, holding a hand to your chest. “I’m so flattered.” You patted his chest as you sat down, scooting to sit in the middle.

The car ride was quick, although the motorcycles that surrounded your vehicle put you on edge a bit. The cold feeling of Barnes’ vibranium arm pressing against your own arm was the only thing that managed to keep you from burning through the car.

“The bracelet needs to come off.” Zemo pointed out on your walk to the bar.

“Excuse me?” You answered quickly, your opposite hand moving quickly to defend the metal cuff.

“Rosalinda only wears gold. She’s never been seen with anything else.”

“But this bracelet is-“

“Hideous” Zemo cut in.

“No! It’s from my dad, jackass!” You argued and stopped your steps.

“Here, let me have it.” Barnes held his hand out, to which you simply took a step away from him. “Y/N, come on.”

“No, I- I can’t take it off.”

Barnes sighed slightly before sliding two fingers under the collar of his shirt to pull a small chain out. He reached behind his neck to unclasp it before offering it to you. “Put your bracelet on here. Nothing’s going to happen to it.” Barnes explained.

“What are…” You asked softly as you reached for the chain. Your fingers grazed the small metal shapes dangling at the end, turning them so you could read the inscriptions. “James Buchanan Barnes..” You read silently. “These are your tags.. Barnes, I can’t ask you to-“

“You’re not asking. I’m offering.”

“Y/N..” Sam tried gently. “It won’t be that long, I promise.”

“Okay, fine.” You agreed reluctantly. You handed Barnes back his chain before reaching for your cuff. You put two fingers together above the metal cuff, focusing on separating it enough to slide your wrist out. Your eyes lingered on the band of lighter skin that was hidden by the cuff, proving to everyone around you that you never took it off. Once you freed your wrist, the cuff circled the fingers you used to open it. You glided it to hook over Barnes’ chain, connecting your fingers again to reconnect the metal. “Please don’t lose it.. It means everything to me.”

“Trust me.” He nodded as he reclasped his chain around his neck. He tucked the tags and your bracelet under his shirt and patted it lightly. You smiled gently in thanks before turning back to the door.

“Good. Now, escort her in.” Zemo instructed Bucky. Barnes held out an arm for you to take so you looped yours through his, making Zemo click his tongue at you. “Other side.”

“What difference does it make?” You asked in annoyance.

“The Del Santos family -especially Rosalinda- loves to show power.” He explained. “Having the Winter Soldier makes you powerful, but being on that side-“ He pointed to Barnes’ metal arm. “-shows it off… They also know how to barter for that power, if you know what I mean.” He gave you a pointed look and nodded towards Barnes, assuming you would understand what he meant. You hoped it wouldn’t come to that, but you understood.

“So treat him like a trophy?” You replied with a raised brow as you stepped around to switch sides. “Easy enough.”

“Oh god.” Barnes mumbled under his breath. “Don’t abuse this.”

“I think you’ll like being shown off a little.” You smirked slightly, keeping your head high as you followed Barnes’ lead into the building. “I’ll try not to go too far.”

Like flipping a switch, you fell into character once you stepped into the crowd and instantly made a statement.

“Listo para cumplir, Soldado de Invierno?” You said simply, keeping your head high and shoulders back as you followed Barnes through the crowd.

You heard the whispers, asking if that was really the Winter Soldier. You had to admit, it gave you a feeling of pride in your chest to see everyone look at you in awe. The respect in their eyes when they met yours was interesting. It was different from the respect you got as Y/N Stark. There was an underlying tone of fear in the looks as well.

Your small group stayed at the bar, Barnes kept his head on a swivel while you leaned your elbows on the bar top behind you. You lazily turned your head to check on Sam but saw the bartender slicing open a snake.

“Al menos no tengo que hacer nada que… asqueroso.” You said to Barnes before chuckling. He made a small sound of agreement, the tiniest hint of a smile toying with his features. “Vamos. Diviértete, soldado.”

“Mi misión es protegerte.” He replied in a flat, monotonous voice.

“Ay, díos.” You groaned, turning to face the bartender. “Señor? Bourbon, neat. Please.”

“Since when do you drink, Santos?” He nodded in amusement as he poured your drink.

“Well, it’s been a rough week.” You sighed, lifting the glass in thanks. “Put it on my friend’s tab.” You winked at Zemo before turning back to look at the busy crowd.

“You lot aren’t welcome here.” A bald man came up to Zemo.

“We have no business with the Power Broker.” Zemo started. “But if he insists…”

“He can come and talk to me.” You cut in, resting a hand on Barnes’ shoulder and sipping your drink. “Or bring Selby for a chat.” You shrugged.

“What do you know about the Power Broker?” Sam asked when the man was out of earshot.

“Here he is judge, jury, and executioner.” Zemo said quickly.

“We’ve got company.” You said into your drink. You set the cup down and cleared your throat. “Soldado de Invierno, hora de ir a trabajar.”

The man reached a hand for your shoulder but was instantly snatched by Barnes. You had to give it to him. He was a very convincing actor. It seemed easy for him to slip back into that person, to become the Winter Soldier. You knew it wasn’t really him, but the violent scene in front of you was hard to deny.

Sam saw it too. He looked to you in concern, hearing the same click of the guns that you did. You easily took the few steps to stand between him and Zemo.

“Don’t worry.” You said simply, maintaining the cocky smirk you wore as Barnes did his work. “He’s got this.. But that’s not what that look is about, is it?” You glanced at Sam and saw the expression on his face. It held concern for Barnes but also the flash of a memory when the Winter Soldier attacked you all after the UN bombing.

“You break character and this whole bar is against us.” You used your glass to cover your lips while you spoke. “I don't like this either but-

Before you finished your sentence, Barnes slammed a man on the bar top by his throat. You instantly slipped back into character to respond.

“Buen trabajo, querido soldado.” You giggled with a pat on his chest. He let the man go as the bartender told you Selby was ready. You swallowed the rest of your drink before putting the cup back on the bar.

“Vamos.” You nodded. Barnes held an arm out for you to take, which you quickly did. 

“You okay?” Sam asked Barnes quietly as you followed Zemo to Selby. A sharp nod was the only response Sam got.

You let Zemo talk to Selby since you had no idea who the woman was. You stayed towards the back of the room with Sam and Barnes, your arms still linked. The cold metal against your arm was the only thing that kept you from bursting into flames.

It was easy enough to be Rosalinda. Confident, powerful, demanding respect, beautiful and a little flirty. It mildly shocked you that you could play into her sadism. You didn’t know where you pulled that from. Maybe Nat taught you better than you thought. Outside of that, Rosalinda was close enough to a Stark that you didn’t feel like you were pretending too much. And lucky for you, you learned Spanish as a child. It was the people that knew her that worried you. One wrong mannerism, one wrong saying, and the whole thing was blown.

“What’s the offer?” Selby asked after an attempted flirt with Sam. You caught Zemo’s signal, a silent attempt to tell you it was your turn. 

“I suppose it’s more my offer.” You spoke up.

“I didn’t know Calvillos travelled this far.” Selby smiled mischievously. 

“Well I heard you like to play hard ball.” You said with a sly smile. “Del Santos can play too. My offer is him. The Winter Soldier, el soldado de invierno.” You offered confidently, walking a small circle around Barnes. “And the words to control him, of course.”

You traced your fingers along his shoulders, across his back and down his metal arm. You felt him tense under your touch, but his demeanor never faltered. “He will do anything you want.” You added, facing Barnes and gently running your hands down his arms. “I’m sorry.” You whispered honestly. Your expression reset to a playful pride as you spun to take your original place beside Barnes and watched for Selby’s reaction.

“This is a fun surprise. I’m glad I didn’t kill you all immediately.” She said happily.

“You have information I want.” You stepped in front of Barnes, blocking him from her line of sight. “You give me everything I need and I give you him.”

She bit her lower lip as she smiled. Her eyes looked Barnes up and down, and it made you want to gag.

“Hello? Are we going to do business or are you going to ogle him all night?” You asked in annoyance as you crossed your arms.

“A bit testy tonight.” She said with an entertained smirk and your pulse jumped. “You were right to come to me.” She said with a nod. “The serum is here, in Madripoor. You’re gonna want to talk to Dr. Wilfred Nagel. Power Broker had him work on it but it didn’t go as planned.”

“Is Nagel still here?”

“Crumbs for free but the bakery will cost you.” She wagged a finger at you. “And before you get cute, you can’t find Nagel with me.”

Before either you or Zemo could offer a rebuttal, Sam’s phone went off. You felt in your bones that it wasn’t going to work out well if he answered that call.

As Sam was on the phone, which Selby made him answer on speaker, she circled you and Barnes. You nodded towards Sam, allowing Barnes to take a few steps away from you.

Before you knew it, your cover was blown and the shot rang out. Selby was dead and the boys easily took down the other two guys in the room.

“This is going to come back to us.” You said as you stood on the other side of the room, as far from her body as you could be.

“Just drop the weapons and follow my lead.” Zemo said, trying to gain control of the situation.

Without other options, you all followed Zemo out and through the streets of Madripoor. Every turn you took, you felt more and more eyes upon you. Phones buzzed every second and you could only assume it was word spreading of Selby’s death.

“I don’t like this.” You muttered.

As soon as the words left your mouth, gun shots sounded. Barnes grabbed your hand and began running with you following close behind. You ducked the shots and grabbed Barnes’ hand a little tighter. You turned to see Sam struggling to keep up.

“I can’t run in these heels!” Sam yelled.

“Try running in stilettos and a mini skirt.” You replied in annoyance.

“You want to stop them?” Barnes tried.

“I can’t really focus right now.” You answered with an eye roll. You were going to stop and try lifting a rock wall behind you or creating a gust to push them back or even try to summon a quick lightning burst.

Shots came from a high window and took out the two men behind you before you tried to fight back. Zemo came out from behind a dumpster and made a stupid comment about a guardian angel.

“What a coward.” You sneered, Barnes holding you back when you made a move to slap the Baron.

“This is too perfect.” A familiar voice came from the shadows. You pulled away from Barnes and called a small flame to your palm. “Drop it, Zemo.”

“Sharon?” Barnes asked. 

“You cost me everything.” She ignored you guys. You didn’t let the fire go out. 

“Wait, Sharon.” Sam tried. “Someone recreated the super soldier serum. Zemo had a lead.”

“That explains why you guys are here and why Selby’s dead.”

“Why are you here?” You asked carefully.

“I stole Steve’s shield, remember?” She scoffed. “And I took the wings for your ass-“ She pointed her gun at Sam. “-so you could save his ass-“ Her gun pointed to Barnes. “-from his ass.” Her gun landed on Zemo. “I didn’t have the Avengers to back me up so I’m in Madripoor.”

Sam tried reasoning with Sharon but got nowhere.

“We need your help.” You tried and let the flame in your palm die out. “Please. We- We didn’t have any other options…”

With a heavy sigh, Sharon told you all to follow her. You were the first to follow her footsteps. After a second, the other three came behind you. You were questioning the timing of Sharon’s reveal, but overall you were grateful she showed up. Things weren’t looking great up until then.

“Seems like being on the run treated you better than it treated Sam.” You commented as you looked around at Sharon’s place. 

“If I was going to be a hustler, I was gonna live like one.” She said, a hint of pride in her tone.

The three boys then talked about the art, and whether it was real or fake. Sam didn’t believe them until a quick google search told him the truth. Sharon made you all change your clothes, pulling out a whole rack of clothes for the boys to look through and letting you sift through her closet.

You decided on a fitted maroon wrap-style dress. It was a soft material, fitting the curves of your body perfectly. The spaghetti straps criss-crossed behind your neck. You kept your same black heels and made your way back to the group and took a seat with Barnes on the couch.

Sam and Sharon talked a bit, ridiculing the idea of heroes. She called it hypocrisy, claiming that’s why Sam gave up the shield.

“Wow.” You teased as you sat. “You clean up nice, Barnes.”

He smiled slightly at you. “Hey, I didn’t know you spoke Spanish.” He said simply.

“Huh?” His statement took you by surprise. It wasn’t the response you expected. “Right. Yeah, I learned it when I was a kid. Dad tried to teach me French but Spanish was more natural cause my mom's side of the family.”

“You look good too, by the way.” He added and gave you a slight nudge. “Cause I know that’s what you wanted to hear.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Your face.” He said simply. “You give away a lot of emotions in your face.”

“I do not!” You insisted quietly with a chuckle, smacking his arm.

“Yes, you do.” He laughed with a nod.

“Wait a second…” You paused, crossing your legs and leaning towards him. “Were you just nice to me?” You teased with a wide smile.

“Don’t push it.” He chuckled.

“Hey... I’m sorry about using you as bait with Selby. I figured that’s what Zemo was hinting at… It didn’t seem like there was any room for me to say no.” You said honesty. The look in his eyes when you dangled him in front of Selby, you could tell it brought back so much of his trauma. That inability to say ‘no’. You truly had felt wrong for doing it. “I shouldn’t have-“

“Y/N.” Barnes said and put a hand on your leg. Your words were cut off instantly. “It’s alright.. It was for the mission.”

“That doesn’t make it right.” You said softly. “You’re not just an asset or a trophy. You’re my friend.”

“How is the new Cap, by the way?” Sharon asked, drawing your attention.

“Don’t even get me started.” Barnes shook his head.

You dropped your head back to look at her over the back of the couch. “He thought he could bail me out of jail and we’d be best friends.”

“He really thought you needed bail money? ” She laughed as she came around to sit with you two. “And you. You were Mr. America before you were his pet psychopath.” She told Barnes. “Cap’s best friend.”

“She’s kind of awful now.” Barnes said to you.

“She was always kinda awful.” You mumbled while Sam refocused everyone.

“You guys shouldn’t be involved in this.” She said, as if she was warning you. “For your own safety.”

“We got a name.” You added, not leaving any room for discussion. Something about the way Sharon talked to you led you to hold suspicions. “Wilfred Nagel.”

“Nagel works for the Power Broker.” She explained.

“I can get your name cleared, Sharon. But we need your help.” Sam tried.

“I don’t buy that.”

“They cleared the bionic staring machine and he killed almost everyone he met.”

“I heard that.” Barnes said, which drew a small laugh from you.

“I don’t trust charity.” Sharon countered.

“Let’s call it a deal then.” Sam offered.

“Fine.” She shook Sam’s hand. “Lay low. Enjoy the party. And stay out of trouble.”

“I do like a good party.” You smiled as you stood. You held a hand out to Barnes, who groaned before pushing himself up.

He held an arm out to you but before you took it, you turned to face him straight on. You casually adjusted his suit jacket before your hands moved across his chest. Your hands went to his neck while he watched your hands carefully. You slid both pointer fingers under the collar of his shirt and he tensed slightly. You pulled his chain out and held it with one hand and used the other to release your bracelet. You fit the metal cuff back to its rightful place on your wrist with a proud smile. 

“Didn’t give anything away that time, did I, James?” You said quietly, shooting him a quick wink.

“Shall we?” You asked happily, turning to face Zemo and Sam.

Even though you had a point in being in Madripoor and it definitely wasn’t a party, you were excited for the party. It would be nice to relax, not feel any guilt over your father. Any grief over Nat. Any anger at John Walker. And stress about being an Avenger. You could just be a twenty one year old kid and have fun for the first time in what felt like ever.

You lost the boys in the crowd rather quickly. But it wasn’t a heavy thought in your mind to stay with them. What seemed to bounce around in your brain were your interactions with Barnes through the day. You couldn’t quite figure out if you were flirting with him intentionally or just habitually.

You brushed it off temporarily as your personality. You were a Stark after all. And Starks tend to flirt with anyone… Right?

Regardless, you weaved through the crowd and let yourself enjoy the party for a moment. You enjoyed the music, letting your body sway and spin with the vibrations. It was hard for you to tell where anyone was through the vibrations of the floor with the vibrations from the speakers, but you told yourself that wasn’t your problem. Barnes and Sam would be fine for a little while. You weren’t sure how long you had been dancing when you heard the boy beside you.

“I don’t think I’ve seen you around before.” A boy said from your side.

Turning, you were met by a very beautiful boy. He was a bit taller than you, dark brown curly hair that fell messily across his forehead. You couldn’t tell the color of his eyes, only that they were looking at you with admiration. You couldn’t help but smile at him.

“I’m just passing through.” You answered vaguely. Given your previous escapades through Madripoor, you wanted to be as discreet as you could until you were able to leave.

“You come with anyone?”

“Just a few friends..”

“No boyfriend?”

“A boyfriend?” You repeated with a laugh. “I wouldn’t say that.”

“Girlfriend?” He tried.

“No.” You laughed slightly. “I’ve been out of the dating game for a few years, actually.” You snapped your fingers to show what you meant.

“You’re too pretty to be at a party alone.” He shamelessly flirted.

“Well I’m not alone.” You corrected. “This is actually a friend’s party.”

“Your friends with the Power Broker?”

Before you could voice a response, a hand found your arm. You quickly looked over and saw Barnes at your side, only his eyes weren’t on you. They were on the new guy.

“I thought you didn’t have a boyfriend?” The boy said nervously.

“Come on, Sarge.” You chuckled, noticing the staring and tense shoulders resembled jealousy. But for Barnes, distrust and suspicion was a more likely reaction. “It was nice to meet you.” You told the kid before pushing Barnes to move.

You couldn’t help but wonder… If the party was the Power Broker’s, but Sharon was hosting like it was her party.. Could Sharon be the Power Broker? Or closer involved than she led you to believe at least?

The next morning, you were all walking through an old shipping yard. Sharon was smart enough to grab you a more practical outfit, a skinny fit pair of black pants and a fitted light blue long sleeve and better shoes. You followed Sharon’s lead to crate. While she stayed for lookout, your group of four went in.

You knocked with one hand and felt the vibrations change at the end. You nodded towards the back of the container so Zemo went to take a look and exposed a secret door.

Sam and Barnes went in first, you behind them, and Zemo behind you. The guys tried to get you to take a gun but you adamantly refused, telling them you were a terrible shot and you had weapons of your own. Sam tried talking to Nagel, but he tried to run instead. Instantly, Nagel froze when he saw Barnes.

“You know who he is, right?” You chuckled, something intimidating dancing in your words. It was something you normally didn’t hear in your voice. You usually weren’t the intimidating type but things were different…You were different. “There’s Baron Zemo and me… Well, you’ll see.”

“How about a counter proposal?” Nagel tried. You ignored Sharon’s warnings in your ear. “Make me a better offer and I’ll talk.”

“Your life isn’t enough?” Your brows raised as you challenged him. You nodded slightly before raising your hand. Your fingers lazily pointed straight up as you grabbed hold of Nagel’s blood. “You don’t know what I’m capable of, do you?”

“Maybe she’s the intimidating one.” Zemo said, an odd respect in his voice.

You forced Nagel to his knees while Sam kept his gun pointed at him. “I can manipulate air too… I wonder if I could pull it from your lungs since you refuse to talk.”

“Okay, okay!” Nagel broke and told you the whole story after you released him. You were getting good at your new blood trick, and that mildly worried you but you had to push it to the back of your mind. Parts of his story included Siberia, an American who you could only assume was Isaiah Bradley, the Snap, and the Power Broker.

You caught the name Donya Madani, committing it to memory. If she was someone Karli wanted to help, she was someone that could lead you to her.

“Is there any serum in this lab?” Barnes asked. When Nagel didn’t answer, he pressed the gun to the man’s temple.

“No!” He said quickly. “But would she-“ He gestured to you. “-be incredible with it.”

“Thanks, but that’s a question I don’t need answered.” You crossed your arms and leaned against the wall behind you.

“The pure power you hold..” He continued and let out a devious chuckle. “You’re not at all curious?”

“I’m not the kind of person who deserves it.. Trust me. There’s probably as much blood on my hands as his.” You nodded to Barnes. “Just different motives.”

“Aren’t you tired of depending on them to help you? To save you?”

“I know my value. Anyone else’s opinion doesn’t really matter.”

The rest happened too fast to process in that moment. Sharon burst in. Zemo shot Nagel and that drew an interesting reaction from Sharon. And an explosion went off. Barnes had pulled you out of the way before you could get caught up in the blast. 

Your head spun mildly from the quick movement and your ears rang violently. You tried to shake it off but that seemed to only make it worse. You felt a warm stream down the side of your head and realized a loose piece of shrapnel had sliced your forehead.

“You alright?” Barnes asked, helping you to your feet. “Y/N? Are you alright?”

“Yeah.. Yeah, I’m fine.” You nodded, mildly disoriented. Looking around, you saw the smoke gathering in the room. You put a hand above your head, using it to keep the smoke at the top of the room.

“Ah shit.” He muttered, pushing the loose hair out of your face. “You’re bleeding.”

“I’m fine.” You pushed his hand away. “We gotta go. These chemicals are going to go off any second and I doubt I can save us from that.”

You got Sharon to her feet while Barnes got Sam. Sam asked about Zemo, but that was the least of your concerns. You four had to get out of there before you were trapped.

You tried using your powers to move the shipping containers or pull a piece of the wall apart but it was too heavy to do in such a hectic environment. There was too much going on for you to really focus. Once you were out, the boys started arguing about whose fault it was. 

“Not the time!” You shouted at them, your back against one of the fallen containers. “We’re blocked in and you three are out of bullets. So either I can try to handle this or we stay here and get caught. Either way, you need to zip it so one of us can come up with something.”

“Just use your pow-“ Barnes tried.

“I can’t do anything when you’re this loud!” You snapped. “Besides, the containers are too heavy. I’m not strong enough.”

You thought out loud to yourself. “I could try a concrete wall but I don’t know how long I can hold it if I’m worried about getting shot.” You chewed your lower lip in contemplation. “I’m too far to try the blood thing… They’re firing too many bullets for me to redirect back… What if I…”

It was so much easier when you had your dad to talk things out with. When you had someone smarter than you and could see a different angle, who could run the numbers and tell you your best chance, everything was so much easier.

“How are you going to handle it then?” Sharon challenged with an eye roll.

“You really don’t know a thing about me, do you?” You laughed in disbelief.

Before she could offer a rebuttal, there was another explosion. A smirk found its way to your face as you got an idea. You quickly hopped the barricade your group was stuck behind, despite the protests from Barnes and Sam. You slid under a hanging metal beam and popped up by the explosion. You shaped the flames away from you four and pushed it towards the people shooting at you. You used what was left as a wall to give you cover for you to get away.

“That’s how I’m going to handle it.” You said with your trademark Stark pride as you met back up with the group.

“You could've got yourself killed.” Sam reprimanded as you four had to duck into a separate container after a gunshot nicked your shoulder. Barnes launched a metal pole through one of the shooters’ shoulders like a javelin before shutting the door behind him.

“Okay.” You groaned, lighting a flame on two fingers. “That could've got me killed.” You ran the flame gingerly along the graze in an attempt to cauterize the wound and stop the bleeding.

“You’re an idiot.” Barnes grumbled.

“Who just saved your ass, huh?” You challenged as he opened the door when the shooting stopped.

“When are you gonna realize you’re not indestructible?”

“When are you gonna realize who you’re talking to?”

The heavy roar of an engine drew your attention and interrupted the sudden tension. The tension and attitude dissipated as soon as it came but you could tell it wasn’t going to be the last time that grievance was brought up.

“Supercharged.” Zemo said proudly as he pulled up in a sleek black car.

You let out a low whistle and nodded in approval. “She is a beaut.” You commented with an amused laugh. “Would it be wrong if I kept her after this?”

“You’re going back to jail.” Sam told him. “And you-“ He told you. “-aren’t keeping the car.”

“You’re no fun... Shut up and get in then.” You rolled your eyes. As Barnes climbed into the front seat, you went to the driver’s side - as if proving a point that you didn’t want to sit behind Barnes - and hopped over and into the backseat. “We still need him.”

Sam got in on the other side and after a quick conversation with Sharon, you were ready to go.

“You’re not gonna move your seat up, are you?” Sam asked.

“No.” Barnes said simply. You rolled your eyes at his childish antics. You leaned forward and tugged his sleeve to get his attention.

“Move your seat up.” You insisted.

“I’m not gonna move my seat.”

“Why not?”

“He didn’t move his seat for me so I’m not-“

“Solo tienes que mover el maldito asiento, Barnes.”

“No me voy a mover“

“Venga, muévete.”

“Por qué debería?“

“Cállate y mueve el maldito asiento. Hmm?” You patted his chest before leaning back. Barnes scoffed, but slid forward slightly.

“Okay…” Sam started, leaning closer to you to speak quietly. “What the hell was that?”

“I’m fluent in Spanish.” You shrugged as you leaned to the middle and spoke in the same hushed tone. “Dad taught me when I was eight-ish. I use it for fun or when I’m trying to prove a point, hence the conversation you just saw. Why?”

“Not that… That.” He gestured to you with one hand and to Barnes with the other. “You guys have been flirting since-“

“Nope.” You shook your head and sat back again. “I’m not talking about that.”

“But you were! Why else would he listen to you?”

“What are you guys talking about back there?” Barnes tried.

“It’s above your pay grade, Barnes.” You answered without thought. “Anyways, Sam.” You turned back to Sam. “I’m a Stark. If there was any flirting, it’s harmless. Starks flirt with everyone.” You shrugged innocently.

“Mhmm.” Sam said unconvinced. “If you guys end up together and-“

“If we end up together I’ll be just as shocked as you.” You laughed. “But it’s not gonna happen. I’m pretty sure he hates me, deep down. You saw how he snapped at me a few minutes ago.”

“So just right now and the other day before Walker showed up, right? That’s what you’re basing this on?” Sam asked, gesturing a small circle in reference to the current scenario. You pressed your lips together in a line while you nodded. “But didn’t he make sure you didn’t make it worse after you got arrested?”

“Sure but-“

“Before we ran into Sharon, he reached for you, right?”

“Okay but wait-“

“And he pulled you out of the way of that blast?”

“I see what you’re saying but-“

“And he only seems to get mad at you when you get yourself hurt!”

“It’s coincidental!” You reasoned quickly with your hands up in surrender. “If he’s gonna like anyone, I highly doubt it’s gonna be me. Wanna know why?”

“Enlighten me.” Sam laughed.

“Cause I push every button I can with him.” You explained. “I annoy him and I talk shit to him and I don’t listen to him. I purposefully see what I can get away with. I’m his annoying roommate/best friend.”

“Right… Because that gimmick never leads to anything…” He rolled his eyes in amusement. “Whatever you say, Mini Stark.” He chuckled.

On the flight back, Sam and Barnes sat opposite each other while they talked. You opted to lay on the ground between them after healing your shoulder and other small scrapes, wanting something flat to let your back relax. As soon as you laid down, you felt your spine pop and practically reposition itself.

Your mind wandered back to the same thoughts it kept coming back to, with the newest additions to your messy brain. Your dad, and if you were doing right by him. Steve, and if you lived up to his expectations. Nat, and how she’d be proud to see you utilizing the skills she taught you. The boy at the party, his unintentional implications of Sharon and the Power Broker. And Barnes… Sam’s suggestion that you were purposefully flirting with Barnes had made you rethink your last interactions with him.

There were comments slipped in here or there, sure. You had played a bit when you took your bracelet back, sure. But were you flirting? Did you.. Did you have a crush on Barnes? No, no it was all in good fun. You didn’t really know him. Why would you flirt with someone you didn’t know? Right?

“Maybe I should’ve destroyed it.” Sam said, which instantly caught your attention.

“That shield represents a lot of things to a lot of people, including me.” Barnes said quickly.

“Yeah, me too.” You agreed from the floor. “My grandfather made that shield… It holds a special place in my heart, kinda the only physical thing from Howard...”

“The world is upside down and needs a new Cap.” Barnes started.

“And it’s not gonna be Walker.” You added.

“Before you destroy it, I’m going to take it from him myself.” He finished.

“Count me in, Barnes.” You said, sitting up when Zemo came down the aisle. You moved to sit by the side of Barnes’ chair and looked up at him. “In it together?” You asked, holding up a fist.

“Together.” He smiled slightly as he gave you the fist bump you waited for.

“Thanks, by the way.” You added softly as Zemo muttered something. “For keeping this safe-“ You shook your wrist. “-and for getting me out the way of that blast. I could’ve died but you didn’t let me.”

“I told you I wouldn’t let you die, Y/N.” He nodded. “You trust me yet?”

“Hmm, getting there.” You pondered playfully. “You’re making good progress, but it depends on if you’re still mad at me.”

“Why would I be mad at you?” His eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“You yelled at me..” You realized how silly it was once you said it.

“You could've gotten hurt or even killed and I- I can’t have your blood on my hands too..”

“I know I’m not invincible…” You admitted heavily as you looked between Sam and Barnes. You knew Sam worried about you too, but he and Barnes had different ways of showing it. “I know I’m not Iron Man, but… But that’s the way I’ve always fought. It’s how I learned to fight. One time Steve told us ‘If you get hurt, hurt them back. And if you die, walk it off’.”

“Of course he did.” Barnes chuckled as Sam smiled fondly. 

“It’s what I've always followed. So yeah, I’m a little reckless but I can heal myself so I never worried… But I guess I can try to be more strategic if it would make you guys feel better.” You offered with a small smile.

It was nice to know you had people watching your back, two people by your side that would seemingly burn down the world if it took you. You felt safer than you had with anyone since your dad.

“Why do you call him Barnes?” Zemo asked suddenly. “I thought you were all friends.”

“Wait. Does it bother you?” You wondered honestly, looking to Barnes.

“No, just a little different.” He answered with a small shrug.

“Dad always called him Barnes. Not James, or even Bucky. Guess I picked it up from him. I never really thought about it, in all honesty.” You shrugged. 

“Yes, but that’s very business.” Zemo continued. “It’s so impersonal. If you two have a good relationship like you claim, or the type of relationship you two display… Shouldn’t you call him something more intimate?”

Using your powers, you plucked one of the ice cubes out of Zemo’s drink and flicked it towards his forehead. It smacked the center and left a wet square on his skin before plopping back in the cup. You smiled in amusement and looked to Barnes, who also enjoyed your little trick.

“Mind your business.” You chuckled, leaning your back against Barnes’ seat. You tilted your head back against the seat too, closing your eyes and letting out a sigh.

“Hey.” Barnes tapped a finger against your forehead. “Don’t sleep on the floor.”

“Stark?” Sam laughed from the other side of the aisle. “Get up, kid. There’s an open seat right here.”

“With the amount of times I’ve fallen asleep on the floor of my dad’s lab or in a desk chair leaning on a lab table or even on the lab table.” You laughed while you stayed in your spot. “This doesn’t bother me.”

“Get your ass up.” Barnes tried again.

“Too late!” You announced, dropping to the ground. “Good night.”

You woke up when you all landed. Even though you had napped on the floor, you didn’t wake feeling stiff or uncomfortable. You followed the boys out of the jet and through the Latvian streets.

It was a beautiful country, as many European countries were. Cobblestone streets that carried vibrations perfectly. Intricate stone buildings that were tall but not towering. Simple painted doors to break monotony.

“I don’t suppose any of you bothered visiting the memorial?” Zemo asked, referencing the memorial for Sokovia.

“I did..” You said softly, almost too quiet for anyone to hear.

“Did you?” Zemo was honestly surprised.

“After my dad’s funeral, when I moved out… There was a gap between leaving and moving in with Barnes. I didn’t know where else to go or who I was without Tony Stark. So I went to the memorial… It didn’t make anything clearer but it reminded me of a lot.”

“I’m sorry about your father.” Zemo said. You swore you heard sympathy playing in his voice. “He had his flaws but he was a good man.”

“Yeah, thanks, you and the rest of the world are sorry.” You said, somewhat bitterly. “He was the only permanent family I had. No one cared about me like he did.” You felt Sam and Barnes shoot you a look of confusion but you didn’t acknowledge it.

“What about the Avengers?”

“Yeah, they were great.” You shrugged slightly. “It just wasn’t quite the same. I was the most important thing to him, you know? Whenever I was feeling off, he was always there with something fun to distract me. Granted, that something fun was usually a new piece of tech he wanted to test, but it always worked to cheer me up. The world misses and mourns Iron Man, the CEO of Stark Industries and Earth’s best defender. No one other than me mourns my dad.” You explained as you noticed a change in Barnes’ demeanor.

“I’m gonna go for a walk.” He announced.

“You good?” Sam tried.

“Yeah. See you in a bit.” He nodded before taking off.

You lingered outside while Zemo went in. Sam turned in the doorway when he realized you hadn’t moved.

“Little Stark?” Sam asked. “You coming?”

“That was weird, wasn’t it?” You commented, pointing in the direction Barnes went. 

“Yeah but he’s weird.” Sam chuckled. “You know that…. Oh! I see what this is.”

“It’s not that.” You shook your head with an annoyed sigh.

“That’s exactly what it is.”

“Seriously? He’s our friend.”

“You don’t see me chasing after him.” Sam shrugged. “He’s a grown man, Y/N. If he wants to brood and take a walk, let him.”

“You didn’t see it.. Something caught his attention and made him leave.”

“Well I don’t just stare at him so no, I didn’t see anything.”

“Nat taught me to constantly watch my surroundings. To keep my head on a swivel… He saw something I didn’t, but I saw him see it. I just don’t know what exactly he saw.”

“Just come inside.” He sighed. “You can interrogate him when he comes back.”

“ Or I just go check on him… Cause I’m grown too and don’t have to listen to you.” You said carefully, hurrying after Barnes. You heard protests from Sam but none made you turn.

You made it to the alley where Barnes turned. You knelt at the corner, feeling the ground and knocking your knuckles against the stone. You closed your eyes to focus, picturing Barnes and an incoming familiar figure. With an amused smile, you turned the corner.

“Ayo.” You said happily. “I didn’t think I’d see you here.”

“You followed me.” Barnes said, moderately annoyed.

“You made it easy enough.” You muttered before turning to the Dora.

“What brings you to Latvia?” You asked, already knowing the answer.

“Y/N.” She greeted respectfully. “I’m here for Zemo.” 

[postmodernmulticoloredcloak]

I decided to watch the Walker pilot so you don’t have to. #2

Because I don’t love myself enough, I guess. Let’s continue.

Recap in case you missed the first part: it’s boring, Jared acts like he stumbled on the set and never heard about it before, Texan law enforcement must wear very pristine shirts and cowboy hats or they will die, I guess, the cinematography wants to be good but I’m not sure it knows how to do it.

The last thing I mentioned in the first post was Jared doing a thing with his mouth but I think you need to see it. It’s basically the extent of Jared’s acting in this show. I had nothing against you, man, I swear. I even got your autograph once. I’m not a hater. I’m just looking at him...

THE TITLE CARD! I had paused the episode riiight before the title card. You have to witness it in all its embarrassing glory

Whose idea was it??

Some shots of the city of Austin. Walker and Martinez (Mexican Lady Cop) are having lunch. She says she’s heard about him, he asks what she’s learnt, she says, I textuallty quote, “I hear you are the edge of the coin”. Again, we are not allowed to have any kind of slight metaphor without the dialogue slapping us in the face with it.

“Not head or tail, just... your way” Jared didn’t even come up with the metaphor in that interview, it was in the script. Unless he came up with that line, which isn’t even a good line.

She basically tells him not to get in the way of her career. Being a Mexican-American cop is hard! Such deep commentary.

They start discussing the case, which I had already forgotten about. The cop who was slightly assaulted and won’t talk about it. “Maybe whatever was in that truck spooked him enough to abandon his oath” maybe it was a monster. god I wish it was a monster so that’d mean I’m watching Supernatural and Jensen is in it. The “oath” thing is kinda icky, like they want to remind us that being a cop is a noble path. It is in some places under some conditions. But we’re talking about Generic American conditions.

He’s like “let’s use the traffic cams to see if we can see something” and he slips right into his Sam tone. Admittedly that’s a Sam kind of thing to say.

It was day, and now it’s night. Walker house. He arrives when his family have already started dinner. Except the daughter isn’t there, she’s out with a friend. “Isabel, some Mexican girl” Walker’s father calls the friend. “Mexican American, dad” the gay brother corrects him, a deep and interesting commentary on ethnicity in the United States, we’re weeping with emotion.

Walker apparently isn’t happy that his mother has enrolled his daughter in a Catholic school, his father snaps back at him. We don’t care. We’re not emotionally invested in any of this.

There’s some awkward dialogue because he mentions the daughter playing basketball, but she’s switched to soccer. Wow, it’s like she’s become an entirely different person in those eleven months he was undercover! Can you believe? Apparently she used to play soccer before, she’s come back to it. Whoa. She’s an utterly unrecognizable person now, it’s going to be so hard for Walker to get to know her again from scratch. Can you believe?

Then he gets a call. He needs to pick up the daughter from the police station. He does some Jared awkward faces and leaves.

The daughter (Stella) was at a party and was arrested for possession. I miss when possession meant demonic possession. Dramatic music plays. She’s there with the Mexican American friend, whose parents arrive and he starts a speech on how they should get to know each other better. It is so not the right context to start making friends. “Epic first meeting” Isabel says. “I’m so sorry, this is so embarrassing” Stella says. “For who?” Walker quips, like a normal person does.

He’s like, let’s go, and the girls hug, which is the only believable expression of affection I’ve seen so far in the episode. Can’t the story be about Stella and Isabel?

Father-daughter conversation in the truck. Apparently we have emotional moments in cars, which we have never seen on television before.

He asks what she was thinking, she’s like, duh what do people use drugs for. She calls him out for disappearing completely. She mentions how it was bad enough that they didn’t have mom. He says “we both got to stop acting like she’s gonna come back and put us right” which makes absolutely zero sense. It’s like someone wrote it on a note for how to develop the characters and they just decided to slap it into the script of the pilot. Remember these people haven’t seen each other for eleven months, he left shortly after his wife died. They didn’t have the time to process the grief together, why is he even saying that line here?

Meanwhile Martinez get home and we meet her boyfriend, a very cute Black man. They’re cute. Why can’t the story be about them?

He asks her about Walker, she says he’s a mess. Oh god. She says he was a Marine, “signed after 9/11”. Holy shit. He’s a Marine who signed up after asdfghjkl can’t you feel the Manly Trauma here????

He’s a Marine who signed up to fight Muslims after 9/11 and now has a dead wife, he’s exactly the kind of male lead character we need right now.

She says she’s trying to figure him out. Her boyfriend is like “dude stop thinking about that guy, he’s not at home trying to figure you out” and she replies “oh I’m pretty sure he thinks he knows everything about me already”.

This is the first scene that hasn’t felt bad so far.

Meanwhile Jared and his brother go to a bar. It’s very ~Texas Aesthetic~, and they’re wearing cowboy hats, of course. You are not allowed to go to a bar without a cowboy hat in Texas. “The brothers Walker” the flannel-shirt-clad bartender says, coming with drinks. Jensen Ackles makes a face somewhere in the mountains.

The brother goes to call his partner and the bartender starts chatting with Walker. She has a conversation with Jared’s awkward faces and she’s like, I guess you left because I couldn’t answer your questions about what happened yo your wife. This is how people converse in real life.

She asks him if he’s alright and he doesn’t answer, instead is like “let’s have a dance”. He doesn’t say he’s fine, but I think it still counts as a I’m Fine Lie Moment #2 because that’s what it is in spirit.

I know you’re bored, I’m bored.

They dance in the Texan bar, I’m distracted by the pool tables and wish this was Supernatural so we’d see Jensen Ackles play pool.

Obviously the dance is interrupted by work - a text from Ramirez who says she’s got something, “office 8am?” so he leaves because he has to wake up early. I’m not kidding.

I was kind of warmed over by Ramirez and her cute boyfriend and by the bar who was kind of nice as a location, when the next scene at the office immediately starts with Ramirez saying “My mom wouldn’t let me play with dolls when I was a kid, so Iearned about cars instead”. I die a little inside. It’s the second time she’s referred to her mother wanting a son...? So she’s badass because she wasn’t raised to be feminine...? Ew.

So they have this lead thanks to her knowledge of cars. They go investigate. I’m bored.

I shouldn’t have said I was bored, because Walker destroys my boredom by having Jared pick up a cross and start talking to “JC” sarcastically asking him for guidance about his kids going to the Catholic school. “Can you stop” Ramirez says, along with all of us.

By the way they’re in a workshop run by an ex-convict who employs former criminals to make figurines (like that cross). I got a bad feeling about this. Former criminal in cop shows is always code for current criminal.

The investigation leads to two guys who work in the store - “oh I know you,” one immediately says when he spots Walker, “you’re the ranger with the dead wife”. Walker is like, what did you say. And the guy is like oh I heard the story of a ranger’s wife biting a bullet near the border, guess you couldn’t protect her uh~~~

They exchange more provocations - Walker calls him some lowlife something and the guy goes to punch him and Walker beats him up. Violently. I’m uncomfortable. We’re supposed to think he’s exaggerating here but... he does get very violent and should not be a cop. Period.

They go to Ramirez’ house because he cut his hand. Her boyfriend is like “baby there’s a dude bleeding on your couch” I want a season of him, exclusively him.

She scolds Walker. Not because he beat up a guy with more force than needed, but because he acted stupid and that’s bad for her career. I’m uncomfortable.

Also, what’s bad is that they’re supposed to work *together*. He says he has his own way of doing things. Yikes yikes yikes.

She says that her theory is that they put them together because he always break the rules. Apparently she read up his cases and he always break the rules. The main character of the show is a cop who break the rules in half the cases he works. Yikes yikes yikes but also did I mention yikes?

No, wait, he acknowledges that he “bends” the rules, like that’s better! Yikes!

More bad dialogue, then Stella’s school calls him. She hasn’t been at school.

He goes to ask Isabel’s mother, who reveals they haven’t their papers yet, so any criminal activity would mean deportation. He talks about it with Ramirez and mentions that his brother who’s a DA could get in contact with the Feds to speed up the papers. Are we supposed to be like “oh what a good guy”? The thing is just creepy to me.

Well, at least Ramirez says something about it, or actually quotes her mother who used to say that the law doesn’t protect us. That’s why she ~burned bridges~ with her family! Apparently because she became a cop.

Ow. Her mother is not speaking to her because for her, her daughter being a cop is like a betrayal. But for her it’s a way to set things right! We’re supposed to think her mother is exaggerated. #notallcops #individualgoodcopscanchangethesystemfromtheinsideforsuredefinitely

Meanwhile their investigation continues. Remember the cross Walker randomly picked up to mock the concept of Jesus? Ramirez stole it. And now they find out there’s heroin in it. Alright... obviously the business that was supposed to rehabilitate former criminals is a cover for cartel drug dealing. What were we expecting. I’m tired.

Ramirez decides to work the case alone and sends Walker to look for his daughter. “I was that kid once, I always wanted to be found”. The impression you get from the scene is that Walker had forgotten about his daughter missing lol. Ramirez insists he goes. I’m uncomfortable with how many times people put on cowboy hats. Someone should count. We’re only 30 minutes in and it feels like it’s happened 80 times.

Alright, a break now! My laptop’s ventilation is running like crazy, VLC and long tumblr drafts are a bad combination. Or maybe it’s just my laptop being allergic to this show.

[falconfriend]

AU where some different things are possible. Don't read too much into Jay's techno babble, quite honestly, I might edit some of it out, it's not the point.

Don't be surprised if you see this edited before the final ff.net post, but it's here, and I'm happy with it. The original concept has a chapter in which our two main characters talk together and process, and that is still very, very important to me, I'll probably bring it back.

See tags for warnings.

--

The amount of power Zane is channeling right now shouldn't be possible. Jay made darn sure to learn everything he could about Zane's possible repairs while Dr. Julien was still alive—the other guys didn't like to think about it back then, but come on, he was old, Jay knew, everyone else knew too even if they weren't saying it— so anyway, he'd spin wild hypotheticals, ask what happens if one tiny piece of machinery goes wrong.

Lloyd would hit the point where he wanders off, self-consciously chuckling that this isn't really his area but he feels like he's kinda learning things, and Jay would watch the clock tick until Nya got bored... and then, that was his opening, to fire off whatever question would come off as too rude while the others were around.

The doctor would smile in a sort of understanding, if slightly flummoxed, way, and he'd start answering. Jay got a lot of answers! He figured out how to put all of Dr. Julien's numbers into his numbers, you know, the kind we learn in the modern century, and made a copy of Zane's schematics with his notes. He had a harder time finding the focus to figure out the Falcon, but Nya and Lloyd are on that anyway. Logical division of labor.

What is he talking about. What was he thinking about. Zane's dying.

Distractedly, he answers- "I said critical mass. If he doesn't contain that, he could go nuclear."

"He's containing it, right?"

"It doesn't- matter." Containing it also means dying.

"Why wouldn't it matter, Jay-"

Jay asked a lot of questions, but he never did even think to ask about Zane's power source. Shouldn't that be the first thing? Why weren't we asking questions about the power source?

He knows approximately how much power Zane runs on. He knows it isn't this much. He knows how a storm feels, right before lightning is about to strike, what builds up in the air and how much damage it can do, right before he—

Jay takes a step forward.

Wu puts an arm across his shoulders, pulling him back. Jay just about slaps him off before realizing that's a quick way to get himself thrown to the ground and shut up before he can start,

So he waits, a frustrating two, three seconds, until he finds words.

"I can help." His throat is dry and he wouldn't mind except that he needs to be louder. "Get me to him, I can help!"

The rest of the ninja are turning to look at Jay… so… slow. Cole looks like he could be swimming through molasses. Jay seethes, and flexes and unfurls his fists by his sides to let it out, and takes a small step back instead of forward.

It works. Sensei releases him, almost.

Kai looks like he might be committing a crime if he lets himself look away from Zane, which isn't helping. Finally, though, he opens his mouth before Jay can. "Your powers? …Do you think?"

"'Do I think-' yes, I think, that's electricity. Or, electromagnetic- whatever. It's energy. I can feel it, Kai- this is taking too long! Where's Pixal- Pixal! Pixal, yoo-hoo, tell them I can help!"

"That won't be necessary," says Wu. Everyone is moving like an old man right now, taking their time; Jay's sure of it. Remember that comment about Cole? It feels like Jay's the only thing who isn't wading through molasses. Jay and the Digital Overlord, that is, and Zane, who cries out so bad Jay spends that moment sure that everything's over and Zane is gone now-

Everyone is moving like the slow old man Sensei talks like, but then Jay sort of- must have blinked, or something, because suddenly, they're all shifted. Cole sets a hand sturdily against his shoulder. It takes him a moment to realize that they're all on his side.

Jay finds a hardened, gold feeling deep in his chest, and latches onto it, and uses it to find his voice. "Okay." Okay. Look. Think. "Cole, I'm going to run at you and I need you to launch me, onto that web. Lloyd, use your energy to boost me."

"But-"

"We don't have time! It's just a scratch."

"Keep him on the edge of the blast. Try to center it about two meters from him." Jay looks back at Nya, Nya looks back at him. It's like they're both realizing how small everything has been. They're nineteen- Jay's nineteen, Nya's eighteen. It's like- like, we didn't need to know the shape of the care right now, I care about you.

Nya waves him away to the task at hand with a smile that means What? Anyway, you're coming back.

Jay looks at Cole and Lloyd. They look back at him. "Well, let's go." With a serious expression, not a word in response and not wasting a second, Cole stoops, palms up and fingers intertwined, a foot-sized platform.

"I'm ready for you, Walker."

He gulps. Time freezes for a second and then skips forward again, like half a second that definitely shouldn't be allowed to be that long. "Okay."

Kai steps forward, like he's going to- hug him, maybe? Rub his back? Push him forward?

"Okay ninja-go—" he kicks off and twists. Off the ground, off Cole's intertwined hands, launching him into the air- about to panic and yell Now, Lloyd when Lloyd finds the right moment anyway, blast re-aiming him just as he's about to fall-

He's sailing through the air, back sore and ears still ringing as the wind whistles past them. Ninjago city sails beneath him. He's two feet short of Zane's hand. He's going to miss.

He's going to miss, he's sorry, and they don't have a second shot, and not that it would be okay if he didn't but now he's going to get all caught in the explosion too,

And Zane reaches back, and grabs his hand.

The jolt that immediately moves through Jay is an absolutely massive electrical discharge. It tries to run from him straight to ground; at first, he was not connected to the circuit, so the electricity is looking for him as its way out. Here's the thing about electricity—it doesn't ask questions. It's already moving by the time your question is halfway out of your mouth, and that's why you need to either be five steps ahead or be ready to start improvising right now or else you're dead.

Something about that isn't how electricity should work, though. It doesn't rush into... a wire that isn't connected to a throughline. Batteries have two ends, positive and negative, and a wire that isn't connected to both of them might as well not be a wire at all— electricity isn't trying to get out, it's trying to get to somewhere, electrons hungry to get to that battery's positive side. Every single electrical invention in the world is formed by humans forcing those electrons to take the long way.

This electricity doesn't have a destination.

The Digital Overlord is always destroying. That means energy in him is leeching outward; this isn't just entropy, this is entropy gone rogue. Jay doesn't know where he's getting the electricity from, but- if he can destroy, maybe he can create. Who knows. Whatever. What becomes apparent right then is that it seems like the Overlord needs to always leech outward, and what Zane is doing is containing him. Sooner or later the snake eats its own tail.

Zane nods, with a firm little hum, as if he can tell from Jay's face what's going on in his head. It's businesslike, and it jolts Jay back to work. Jay can stand this for a few minutes longer, but Zane- Zane's dying.

So: parallel paths. Create two paths, two options, and the electricity will keep looking for how it can be the least crowded. It's like the reason air leaves a popped balloon, kinda like pressure but with a thousand electrons that all hate each other and feel indifferent about you. Or picture... getting into a crowded convention center, and someone coming running to announce they've just opened a second doorway, and that you can get in through either line. Create two paths, and only half of it goes through Zane.

Zane releases his hand.

They really, really need to have a talk later, but Jay is relieved it's not a talk about being willing to be saved. He's helping himself be saved.

Jay holds one of the golden contact points in one hand, and one in the other. The energy rolling around his ligaments and bones deflates, taking the easiest path.

"I had hoped you would do that behind me," says Zane, whose eyes are now closed.

Jay doesn't really try for a little laugh, so much as his body tries for a little laugh, like his brain is fine-tuned into making his excuses with or without him. "You could've said that earlier."

"No, it's alright. Just… here, scoot a little to the side-"

"This is pathetic," hisses a condensed-evil murmur over their shoulder, like it's obligated to, "YOU THINK YOU CAN DEFEAT ME?"

"Yes," says Zane.

And the bluewhite what-is-that-stuff that he'd once used to take down a plain old treehorn beams closer past Jay's cheek than he can really say he's comfortable with. It's almost like being near a fire- a live wire, static. He's not too cold, but he's sure if he touched it, it would move straight through rapid-action frostbite into part of his face falling off.

"Jay, now." Jay isn't sure what he means by now, that uh, isn't very clear, but he spends a half-second in panic before realizing Zane's ice is running a cable to ground. It'll keep a direct hit from coming back for them. It means, since this is the only window before it connects, they need to hit him now.

Jay pulls the electricity out of himself, out of the air- he takes whatever excess Zane will give him, when he touches his hand- and he breaks the circuit. He shoves it, with force, the opposite of the ways electrons want to work, not the way lightning wants to work—but that's the first step of making lightning. You build up a gap. The buildup snaps from him into the Digital Overlord's metal body. Something is wrung out of him like a sponge.

There's a thunderclap that shakes the city and an explosion that's- like a video game character died. Like it's not a real explosion, it's just something- dissipating. The city just turns white.

Jay becomes aware that he's flying again for the first time in two years, and Zane is holding onto him but losing strength. And then it turns out that he's got his arms around Zane, too. He only figures that out when he starts to panic that Zane's going to fall, and the tug of Zane's weight on his arms doubles, and alerts him that they're there, secure. His body was thinking ahead, even if he wasn't.

Zane's out. He's… fine. He's fine. He's got to be fine.

And while we're at it, Jay's hoping he's fine. His heart feels- wrong.

The first thing he needs to do is get back to land, the second thing he needs to do is look at… is get Nya to look at Zane, he's not even sure he can trust his senses. Huh, hang on, there's a sound other than the ringing in his ears.

"Jay!"

That's Pixal.

"Jay!"

She's standing on the roof of Borg Tower, waving her arms, and just as Jay starts to settle enough to realize he's not frozen, adrenaline's not gonna stop him from moving and he should fly somewhere. ...Huh. He has to pick where.

It would be a really good move to let their friends see they're alive. Nya's good at robotics.

Pixal and Borg… can probably fix him faster.

Zane sparks, hard.

Like Superman, made of light, Jay descends toward Borg Tower in a graceful arc. His feet connect with the roof with a very soft patter. He locks eyes with Pixal to hand off their boy to her.

"Whoa, okay, Sparky, geez. Just thought I'd keep the sweat out of your eyes."

Well. That's not correct.

There are the tiles of a hospital ceiling in front of his eyes, which feels more correct. Apparently, Kai is also in the room, because—

"Yeah. He's okay."

—well, because that's Kai.

Cole, of all the things that could happen here, squeezes Jay's hand. It occurs to Jay that he could have died on- on really, really weird terms with him.

Whoof. Jay takes stock of his body. He starts by feeling the sheets, just to figure out where his body is, then investigates the muscles and aches beneath them. He's in one of those medical gowns that closes in the back.

Everything feels... pretty okay? No, everything feels like he's just been stretched in every direction like a piece of toffee.

No, everything feels like he's just been stretched in every direction like a piece of toffee, but also maybe like he is toffee, so he's fine.

He, uh, definitely can't move. And that feels wrong, but at least he's identified the reason he's in a hospital bed, rather than wondering. He'd find this a lot harder to process if he had walked away from it without a scratch at all, even though it would have been cooler. He sort of wonders if anyone would bring his chart over where he can read it.

"Uh, yeah, that's all great, but what about Zane?"

Kai lets out a small, slightly-amused very-concerned snort. "Jay, you asked that already. He's okay."

"Go easy on him."

That's Lloyd. There are, wow, a lot of people in this room. It's gotta be a pretty small room? Hospital rooms aren't that large. Are his parents here?

"They're on their way."

"My mouth keeps saying whatever's in my brain."

Cole laughs. "Hey, don't worry everyone, he's back to normal."

Jay's breath does a weird thing in his lungs. It's like his body is focusing on every sensory detail except where it hurts. "Yeah, you're just jealous of how I looked up there."

Cole could nearly double over laughing at another time, but right now everything about him is subdued, gentle. Jay could see him ruffling his hair if he wasn't, you know. In a hospital bed. "Sure am, sparkplug."

And there's quiet for a beat.

Jay continues, still staring at the ceiling, "Hey, Nya, how bad are you gonna kill me."

"Oh, uh—" That's Lloyd again, kicking one heel awkwardly back against the wall. Kai speaks quickly—

"She wanted to be here. It's killing her not to, I mean— everyone did. Sensei, too. We told them we've got you."

"That's nice."

"I-I said I'd run and call her once you're awake, just to let her know. I should probably go do that now. She's—"

"With Zane," Jay finishes, no bones about it. Kai nods. "That's nice." The way energy thrums from Jay's palms feels different now, like he's not just pulling it from the air, like there's a battery under his skin, but that's. That's a question for training time. It's sleep time, now.

A/N: Why did the writers say "it's reaching critical mass." I still don't know what that means. Zane's power source is presumably based on some kind of nuclear fission then, but I'm not sure what "critical mass" has to do with the Digital Overlord encounter? If anyone knows how that's relevant to how Zane died, please lend me your knowledge, I'd be very grateful and schooled.

Anyway, critically, this is an AU where it is possible for Jay to help, not an AU where Jay notices he can help. It's built on the assertion that there was nothing Jay could do in the original, but in this universe, different things were possible.

[thebrotherssalvatore321]

Keeping Secrets Ch. 41

Keeping Secrets Masterlist

A giggle sounded through the room as Klaus teased Katie’s sides making her squirm under him. “You’re so ticklish.” He laughed.

“And you…are not ticklish at all.” She complained. "It's annoyingly unfair."

“Perhaps you just haven’t found the right spot yet.” He told her, making her narrow her eyes at him in thought. “You’re welcome to continue your search.” He rolled onto his back taking her with him and she sat up, straddling him.

“Hmm,” she pursed her lips and pulled them to the side, “nah.” She fell down bracing herself on her hands on the bed. “I think I’ll let it be a mystery for a little while longer.” She started kissing his bicep, where his feather tattoo began then kissed her way up it following the birds that branched off of the feather to the last one that sat just under his collarbone then up to his shoulder where she gently bit him, pulling a pleasured sound from him. “I have other ways of making you smile.”

“Oh really, like what?” he asked curiously as he slid his hands up her thighs to hold her hips.

“Flattery for one.” She answered and she could tell he wanted to smile, but was resisting. “Or there’s always doing something random. Like…” she quickly licked the tip of his nose making him wrinkle it and laugh quietly. “See, there are those cute dimples I like so much.” She sat up and looked down at him.

“Cute huh?” He asked.

“Yep.” She told him with a flirty smile. “I also find your accent cute along with your butt, but you already knew that one. Let’s see what else do I find cute about you?” She asked herself as she looked up in thought. “How your hair gets a little curly when you let it grow out.” She told him as she looked at his messy dirty blond hair. “Oh, the way you hold me super close with my face pressed into your neck at night. Even when you’re completely asleep you don’t let go.”

“Why is that cute?” he asked.

“Because it lets me know that you want to keep me close. It shows a certain amount of neediness and it feels good to feel needed.” she told him with a shrug then kissed him and rolled over pulling him with her then wrapped her legs around him.

“You know…” he started but was cut off when she started nibbling on his neck pulling a sigh from him, “If we do this every morning and night you will soon tire of me.” he warned her.

“Not possible.” She replied then bit his neck a little harder, wishing they could blood share. “Unless…you’re getting tired of me.” she stopped and looked up at him.

He pressed his hips into hers letting her feel how much she affected him. “Does that feel like I’m getting tired of you?” he whispered then started kissing her neck making her eyes slip shut and tilt her head to the side.

“No, but I’m sure guys can fake it just as easily as girls.” She argued.

“Have you ever-”

“Not with you.” she answered before he could finish the question.

“Now my interest is peaked.” He said as he sat up on his knees and she slid up to sit in his lap with her legs wrapped around him and he held her close with his hand on her upper back. “Who, prey tell, have you faked it with?”

“Ronan. He was built like a wrestler and most girls might go for that, but in case you haven’t noticed beefy guys with muscles bigger than my head don’t really do it for me. I would have rather faced the cat-o-nine tails than the consummation of our marriage.” She told him as she let her eyes travel his body, thinking about how perfect Klaus was.

He’d suffered through some horrible things in his life, but he’d never been forced to have sex with someone. He’d also done some horrible things and rape was never one of them. “No one should ever have to go through that.” he told her quietly with a pained look in his eyes.

“Yeah, well even in my first life, circumstances shaped me into the perfect actress.” She sighed not looking up. “I had to act like Father was the upstanding guy the town believed him to be, act like he didn’t slice my back open on a daily basis. Had to convince Father I had no idea how my back had healed so fast when really my nanny and her daughter were cailleach.” She used the Irish word for witch reminding him that she still spoke Irish. “I knew how to act like everything was okay, but my wedding night was my biggest acting gig to date. Either I was convincing or Ronan just didn’t care.”

“Did he know you didn’t want him?” he asked and she shook her head no. “How long were you with him?” he asked, not being able to remember if she said in her journal.

“Eight years.” she answered.

“And in all those years you never once-”

“Nope.” She answered his question before he could finish it.

“Do me a favor, never fake it with me.” he told her as he laid her back on the bed and looked into her eyes. “If you’re not in the mood or you’re not into it, just tell me. It won’t be the first time you got me all hot and bothered then left me hanging.” Remembering the first time they kissed she wrinkled her nose and covered her face with a laugh. She moved her hand and looked at him with slightly apologetic eyes. “Just so you know…pleasuring myself to the thought of you that night did little to ebb my desire to have you.”

His words and the visions they brought to mind made a wave of pleasure shoot through her and she smiled, biting her lip before she let it slip out of her teeth. “Do you know why I was awake the night after the twenties dance?” she asked as she tightened her legs around him and he shook his head no. “It wasn’t because I was upset about Alaric. It was because I couldn’t stop thinking about you.” she grabbed his hand and kissed his fingertips, “The first time we kissed, every time you kissed my cheek or just touched me in general, the look in your eyes when you told me you intended on setting me ablaze…every memory like that kept playing in my head getting me all worked up. There was a reason I walked away from you when we were dancing that night.”

He slid his hand from her grasp to rest between her breasts as he fell forward to hover over her with his free hand on the bed beside her shoulder. “I thought I’d made you uncomfortable.”

She shook her head no. “It was because Caroline gave me a questioning look when she realized who I was dancing with and I realized that you, the brother of the man I was still bound to, the big, bad, original hybrid that had brought my friends so much terror, were my darkest desire.” She slid her hands down his chest to hold his sides. “And giving in to that desire was the best decision I’ve ever made.”

Klaus slipped his thumb over her bottom lip as he looked into her eyes then moved his thumb and caught her lip between his in a kiss that quickly turned heated and passionate.

TVDTVDTVD

Later that day Katie stood at the end of the desk in the study where Klaus sat looking through Esther’s spell book. “So since I was wrong about the morning sickness being over and I missed the meeting with Sophie, what’s the plan for tonight?”

“Sophie is going to do a locator spell to find Elijah. To keep her from getting caught another witch is going to do a bigger spell to mask Sophie’s.” he told her.

“How did you convince another witch to do magic?” she asked with an interested look.

“I haven’t.” he answered looking confident. “That is what this is for.” He held up a page from the book and Katie looked at it to see a daylight ring spell. “Marcel’s right hand man Thierry is in love with a witch that owns a shop in The Caldron. Since said witch gave Thierry a tip about a werewolf in the quarter that led to dead night walkers, I gave him a little nudge and he ordered a rousting of The Caldron. When they do said rousting tonight while Rebekah and I are at Marcel’s party, a compelled nightwalker of mine is going to bite Thierry’s little girlfriend. If he loves her as much as he says he does, he will kill my night walker.”

“And Marcel has rules about vampires killing vampires.” Katie nodded. “To save Thierry his witch girlfriend will do a spell, masking Sophie’s. Too bad there’s probably not going to be time for you to make Sophie to unlink herself from me while the smoke screen is still up.” She sighed.

“One of the many things I’m working on, Love.” He told her as he wrapped his arm around her waist.

“I know and I don’t mean to complain. I just wish there was more I could do than sit on my butt and do nothing.” She told him then pointed to the spell on the desk. “So what is this for?”

“Insurance.” He answered. “Another compelled vampire of mine is going to say they found this, a spell Marcel keeps under lock and key, in the shop of Thierry’s girlfriend.”

“Then Marcel will accuse Thierry of treason along with the fact that he killed another vampire and he will lose his right hand man status leaving room for you to slip into his place.” Katie finished and he looked up at her with a smirk. “And there’s no way I can go to the party?” she asked.

“You know I would grant you anything you wish, but no. It’s too dangerous.” He told her as he stood up and wrapped his arms around her waist.

“I know…” she sighed. “Go, do your thing.” She told him then pecked him on the lips.

TVDTVDTVD

Katie was outside, sitting on the edge of the pool with her legs in the cool water. “I thought you were supposed to be staying inside.” Katie jumped and looked to her left to see an almond skinned woman. She recognized her as one of the witches, but couldn’t remember her name. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. I’m one of Sophie’s friends. She asked me to keep you company while everyone’s out.”

“Yeah I remember seeing you around.” Katie told her as she stood up. “What’s your name again?”

“Sabine.” She answered. “So, now that you’ve had time to wrap your head around it, how are you feeling about becoming a mother?”

“I…am…excited, for the most part.” Katie answered. “I just wish I could go get an ultrasound done so I can see it and maybe find out what it is so I can’t stop calling it, it.” she said then remembered Fiona doing a trick where she put her wedding band on a string and dangled it over her stomach. “I have a weird question, can you determine the gender?”

Sabine smiled and nodded. “Come on, let’s go into the house where there are fewer mosquitoes.”

“I…don’t have a wedding band…” Katie said realizing it was, according to Fiona, a crucial part of the trick.

“The wedding band is unnecessary. It was just our way of making things make a little more sense to the humans since a wedding band is tied to both the mother and the father.” Sabine laughed as they walked into the kitchen and she motioned to the island. “Hop up.” Katie hopped up and lay back on the counter with her hands at her sides. Sabine took off her necklace and dangled it over Katie’s stomach. After a few seconds she smiled and said, “I think it’s a girl.” Katie smiled. “No. Wait.”

“Don’t tell me I’m having twins.” Katie said thinking Sabine had found a second baby that maybe she hadn’t heard.

But Sabine dropped the necklace, threw her head back and started chanting. Knowing from the many times she saw Fiona have a vision that Sabine was having one now, Katie grabbed Sabine’s wrist hoping to see it, but Sabine was on vervain. After a minute or so Sabine stopped and looked at Katie with wide eyes.

“You just had a vision and from the looks of it, it wasn’t good.” Katie pointed out. “Tell me what it was about.”

“You’re delivery…it won’t be an easy one.” Sabine warned.

“Is that all you can tell me?” Katie asked sensing something was off.

“Unfortunately, yes.” Sabine answered. “My visions are sometimes hard to read.”

“I’m not feeling well. I’m going to go to bed, you can see yourself out.” Katie told her as she placed her hand on her stomach and started for the stairs. Sabine nodded and left.

Katie however was feeling perfectly fine and instead of going to bed grabbed her laptop and started attempting to translate what she’d heard Sabine say.

TVDTVDTVD

Katie was sitting on their bed with earbuds in her ears still trying to decode what seemed to be very poor Latin when Klaus walked in and pulled one of the ear buds out of her ear. “I thought you should know Elijah will be returning to us.” Klaus told her.

She didn’t look away from her computer. “Yeah, cool.” She told him with a wave.

Klaus blinked down at her a little confused by her lack of reaction. “What on earth are you doing?”

“You speak different languages right?” she asked, finally looking away from the computer to see the look he was giving her. “I had a visitor tonight. A witch named Sabine. Sophie sent her to keep me company and I asked her to do a gender test, after which she had a vision. She said it was about my delivery, that it wasn’t going to be easy, but I think she was lying. And I can’t translate what she was chanting during her vision.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this focused on something before.” He told her as he shifted his weight on his feet.

“I don’t think you’ve ever seen me this worried before.” Katie pointed out as she stood from the bed. “It sounded bad.”

“Alright, what was she chanting?” he asked.

“Hoc est infantima malom. Nos omnia perdetu el eam.” She told him and after a few minutes his eyes grew big and his posture fell. “What does it mean, Klaus?”

“This baby is evil. It will destroy us all.” He answered.

Katie sank down on the bed. “If Sabine opens her mouth…they are going to think our child is the equivalent of Lucifer himself.” She told him with a hard voice.

He sighed, sat down beside her and grabbed the back of her neck, pulling her to him to rest her forehead on his with their eyes closed. “I will protect you and our child with my life.”

“Nothing hurts her.” Katie agreed and they opened their eyes meeting each other’s gazes. “No matter what.”

“No matter what.” He agreed then wrapped his arms around her waist and moved them so that they were lying on the bed with his hand resting on her stomach. After a few minutes what she’d said sank in. “Her?”

“Crap, I was going to ask if you wanted to know before I told you that part.” She told him and he pushed himself up on his arm to look down at her. “According to Sabine’s gender test we’re having a girl and it’s the same test Fiona did when I was pregnant with Jonah.” his eyes were wide and he almost looked scared. “You’re getting your princess.” She told him with a small smile.

A quiet, quick laugh left his lips before he pressed them to hers.

They had been making out for a few minutes when she pulled back. “Mmm, how did the party scheme go?”

“I deviated from the plan.” He answered as he pulled back to look at her face.

“How did you deviate?” she asked as she slid her hands down his chest and around his waist.

“There was no way our little suicide witch wasn’t gonna try and take out Marcel with her.” He told her. “So I killed Thierry’s girl, but unfortunately that cut Sophie’s locator spell short.”

“But you said Elijah was returning to us.” Katie pointed out a little confused.

“By protecting Marcel I’ve cemented his trust. So much so that he’s agreed to return Elijah to us. And…when he’s told me everything I need to know about Davina we will have her for ourselves.” He told her in his I’m diabolical and I know it voice. He expected her to say something along the lines of, yay Elijah’s coming back or, you’re not going to use a sixteen year old girl as a weapon. But she said nothing. “Care to voice your thoughts?”

“I just…” she sighed and shook her head, “Under any other circumstances I would totally be against using a child as a weapon, but if we can get her to willingly join our side…If she can help protect our baby…I’m all for it.” she shrugged. “As for Elijah…It’s sucked knowing he’s been daggered in a coffin with a teenage witch probably poking and prodding at him trying to figure out how to kill him.”

“I feel like there was an unspoken “but” at the end of that sentence.” He prompted.

“But…” she caressed his back with a sigh, “there’s a reason I haven’t been riding you harder about getting him back. It felt like he still has feelings for me, I know you get jealous easily and I don’t want to be the cause of a Mikealson brother smackdown.” she immediately remembered them fighting while her humanity was off after she told Elijah she had been with Klaus. “Watching two men fight over me was kind of fun the first time when I didn’t care who got hurt, but now…not so much.”

“I trust that you are loyal to me, but if he tries something I cannot promise that we won’t come to blows again.” He told her with a warning look.

“I know, and I’m not asking you to make any promises. I’m just asking you to let me handle it and if I can’t get it through his thick skull that I’m yours and I’m not going to change my mind, then you can throw fists and break stuff.” She told him with a serious face. “Deal?”

“Deal.” He agreed.

TVDTVDTVD

After eating breakfast Katie showered and started getting dressed and after trying on a third pair of jean shorts she slammed the dresser drawer shut. Klaus smirked, looking at the small pooch in her lower abdomen. “It’s not funny.” She told him as she pulled a pair of athletic shorts out of the dresser.

“You’re right it’s not funny, it’s beautiful…You’re beautiful.” He told her as he watched her pull on the shorts then a hot pink racer back tank top.

“I don’t feel beautiful.” She complained as she walked over to where he stood at the foot of the bed with his hands tucked behind his back. “I feel bloated and heartburn is a pain in the ass.”

He grabbed her hips, turned her around then pulled her back into him, sweeping her hair to the side so he could kiss her neck. “You could grow to the size of a whale and I’d still think you were the most beautiful woman on the planet.” He rested his chin on her shoulder and slipped his hand over his stomach.

“Let’s not test that theory.” She told him as she turned her head and pecked him on his stubbly cheek. “If you’re trying to feel her moving you most likely won’t.”

“I’m aware.” He told her defensively.

“Really?” she asked, not believing him. “How?” He walked over to his bedside table, pulled the top drawer open and took out a book. He tossed it to her and she caught it.

“What to expect when you’re expecting.” She read the cover out loud then smiled a bright smile at him. “You’re reading a pregnancy book.”

“Yes it’s actually quite informative.” He told her as he walked around the bed and placed his hands on her sides.

He smiled when she threw her arms around his neck and captured his lips with hers for a happy kiss. “You’re awesome.”

“It’s just a book, Love.” He laughed at her reaction.

“I begged Ronan to buy a book on pregnancy and read it with me. We were miles from town or any kind of midwife. I had no idea what to expect having never even been around a pregnant woman before. He told me that I didn’t need it because my body and nature would take care of everything and he didn’t need to know about pregnancy because the man’s job was to wait outside and have a cigar when it was all over.” She explained. “It’s not just a book.”

“I fully intend on being at your side, holding your hand or whatever you need me to do when the time comes.” He told her then pecked her on the lips. “I’ve read it, cover to cover. The book is yours and I’ll get you more if you want.”

She smiled, pecked him on the lips, “You’re awesome.” Then sat down on the bed. “I have my plans for the day. What are yours?”

“The annual Dauphine Street music festival is tonight.” He told her.

“Seems like this place is no different than Mystic Falls.” She pointed out. “Parties and festivals are hot spots for supernatural shenanigans. If it wasn’t for that I would be begging you to let me come with you. So instead I’ll say maybe next year.”

“Next year?” he asked, noticing the implication.

“I have a feeling if I had the chance I’d really like this city.” She told him with a shrug. “And it’s your favorite place and your home. Am I thinking too far ahead when I say I want it to be our home?”

“What about Mystic Falls?” he asked with an interested tilt of his head.

“Graduation was the last thing that place had to offer me. Now my friends are going to college without me and it just doesn’t feel like I belong with them anymore. So I guess you could say that I’m in the market for a new home.”

He walked over to her with admiration in his eyes. “I can’t wait to officially show you your new home. But for now I have to go.”

“Okay, if you gotta.” She sighed pretending to pout he just smirked and pecked her on the lips before he left.

TVDTVDTVD

Katie was sitting on the couch reading the book when someone rang the doorbell and Rebekah answered it. “You have a visitor.” Rebekah announced as she walked into the room.

Katie looked up to see Agnes, a witch elder, walk in and sit down in the armchair across from her. “What can I do for you?” Katie asked not pleased that a witch was in the house. She was really growing to hate the French Quarter witches as a whole.

“I was just coming to check up on you.” she told her with a pleasant smile.

“I’m fine.” Katie answered. “The baby’s fine.”

“You know you’re overdue for a check up, right?” Agnes asked.

“I’m aware, but going to the doctor isn’t exactly an option right now is it?” Katie asked.

“A lot of women would kill to have a child. It strikes me as odd that you’re not taking better care of yours.” Rebekah spoke up from where she sat at a table in the room looking for the attic she saw Elijah in on satellite images.

“I know a doctor out in the bayou off the beaten path. Now, I took the liberty of making an appointment for you…tonight after hours, just us. Marcel’s men will never get word of it.” Agnes told her and Katie snapped the book shut.

“Well, thanks, but you shouldn’t have.” Katie told her as she stood up and tossed the book onto the couch then headed to the front door with Agnes. “Sorry you wasted your time.” Katie pulled the door open and motioned Agnes outside. “Goodbye.” Agnes walked out and Katie shut the door.

“Well that was rude of you.” Rebekah commented.

“I don’t trust French Quarter witches.” Katie told her as she walked back over to the couch and picked up the book. “And honestly I’m surprised you’d think I’d go anywhere alone with one of them.”

“I see my brother’s paranoia has rubbed off on you.” she sighed not looking away from the computer screen.

“It’s not paranoia if I have legitimate reasons to not trust someone.” Katie pointed out. “If I go to that doctor I’ll go with Klaus, not some witch I don’t even know.”

A few seconds later Klaus walked in and saw Rebekah on the computer just as she’d been when he left this morning. “Please sister, tell me you’re not still at it with the internet search.” He said as he walked into the room to the table that sat between the two armchairs across from the couch that Katie was sitting on and poured himself a drink from the decanter that was always on the table and always full. “How does one begin anyway, just type in ‘anonymous attic’?” he smirked at Katie who glanced up from her reading at him.

“Someone has to find Elijah. Even if I have to search every bloody attic in New Orleans.” Rebekah replied not looking away from the computer.

“Like looking for a needle in a rather large pile of needles.” Klaus commented as he turned to look at Rebekah.

“I remember details about the attic Marcel took me to. There were shutters on the windows behind Elijah’s coffin.” Rebekah replied.

“Well that should narrow it down immensely.” Klaus walked over to Katie and sat down next to her. “Myself, I prefer actual strategy as opposed to mind-numbing labor.” He grabbed Katie’s legs and pulled them to drape over his lap and she leaned to the side and the back of the couch, not taking her eyes off the book in her lap as he wrapped his arm around her shoulders. “Marcel’s delay in returning our brother makes me suspect he’s no longer in charge of the situation. If Davina’s loyalty to Marcel is strained perhaps the young witch will be open to discussing a new alliance.”

Katie took her eyes off the book now interested in the conversation. “As usual, your power grabs are more important than rescuing your brother.” Rebekah said.

Katie frowned and looked between the brother and sister. “You know, it’s not impossible to do both. Davina has Elijah. If we get her we get him. They are kind of a packaged deal at this point.” She told Rebekah then looked at Klaus. “Am I wrong?”

“As per the usual you are spot on.” Klaus told her with an appreciative look in his eyes. Neither of them had told Rebekah about Sabine’s vision. So she didn’t know why it was so important to both of them that they get Davina on their side. “The little witch is going to be at the festival tonight and I’m going to make a move.” He told Katie more than Rebekah. Katie pecked him on the cheek then returned her eyes to her book.

TVDTVDTVD

Katie was alone in the house, cooking supper when she thought she heard something outside. Since Sabine’s visit she’d caught herself going on high alert whenever she was in the house by herself. So she pressed pause on her phone that was filling the kitchen with music. When she heard a twig snap outside she whooshed through the front door and around the house to the sound. A guy was sneaking toward the back door and she recognized him as the same witch that had tried to stop her from leaving the tomb. She got still and quiet and listened. She counted seven distinctly different sets of footsteps including the guy she had eyes on that was about to open the back door.

They created a semi circle around the back of the house. The witches further back were most likely keeping an eye on the one breaking into the house as they slowly closed in on the house. So she decided to leave him be for now. Instead she whooshed to the witch furthest away from the house, disarmed him as quietly as she could then slammed him face first into the ground and placed her foot on his back. She held his arms straight out behind his back, her hands holding tight around his wrists. “Call for help and die.” She practically growled at him. “What do you people want?” he didn’t answer. So Katie pulled back on his arms making him groan in pain. “Answer the question or I will rip your arms from your scrawny little torso.”

“We were sent to kill you.” he answered with a pant.

“By who?” she asked.

“Agnes.” He grunted. “She said that the child you’re carrying will be the death of all witches.”

“Damn it Sabine.” Katie sighed. “Looks like it’s time to send the witches a message.” With a whoosh she broke the guy’s neck. Over the course of the next minute five more witches necks were broken. The last warlock standing was the one in the house. So she whooshed to the back door and listened. She heard him in the parlor and whooshed inside, completely catching him off guard when she grabbed him from behind, sank her teeth into his neck and drank until his heart stopped then let him fall to the floor. He wasn’t even on vervain.

With all of the witches dead Katie went to the kitchen, took her phone off the speaker dock and called Klaus. “I hate to sound rude, but I’m in the middle of something, Sweetheart.” Klaus said when he answered the phone.

“Okay, I just have one quick question.” She told him as she walked into the parlor and looked down at the bloody circle on the carpet. “What should I do with the lifeless bodies of seven warlocks?”

“Are you okay?” he asked, not answering her question, but it was obvious that she now had his full attention.

“Perfectly.” She answered in a chipper voice.

“What happened?” he asked his voice now low and hard.

“Agnes sent some witches to their deaths thinking they could kill me.” she answered looking at the blood puddle that kept getting bigger. “Also, how do I get blood out of a rug? The dead guy in our living room is bleeding everywhere.”

“Where is Rebekah?” he asked once again, not answering her question.

“What the bloody hell happened here?” Rebekah asked as she walked into the parlor.

“She just got back from wherever it is she’s been.” Katie answered.

“I will be there as soon as I can.” He told her then hung up.

Katie put the phone down and looked at Rebekah. “He tried to kill me.” Katie said with a shrug as she leaned down and picked up the stake that had fallen out of the guy’s hand. “Did Agnes seriously think simple witches who aren’t allowed to do the brain pain spell could ambush me?”

“You kind of make it easy to forget that you’re a vampire.” Rebekah answered then stepped over the guy and grabbed his ankles. “Are you going to help me get him out of here or what?”

“Oh, yeah, sorry.” Katie said with a shake of her head and grabbed the guy’s shoulders then helped Rebekah move the guy outside.

TVDTVDTVD

“You took on seven witches…alone?” Klaus asked as he stalked into the house.

“Yep.” Katie answered simply from where she sat on the floor, scrubbing at the blood on the rug.

“You should have called me and let me handle it.” he told her with a hard face.

“I should have called you and let them close in on me while I waited for you?” she asked as she tossed the scrub brush into the bucket of soapy water and stood up.

“There are several places in this house you could have hidden.” he told her with a point to the room he had the coffins stored in.

“You of all people know I do not hide and I do not back down.” she told him with her head held high as she glared at him. It struck her that she’d had a fight like this before, with Damon, and she sighed and wiped the glare from her face. “I know I have a habit of putting myself in harm's way and I know I’m slowly getting weaker. That’s why I bite myself every once in a while to see if I still heal and I whoosh just to see if I still have speed.” She cupped his face in her hands. “You know that if I thought for even a second that taking them on would put the baby in danger I wouldn’t have done it, right?”

“Your fight is one of the many things I like about you.” he told her as he took one of her hands off his face and kissed the underside of her wrist. “I know you’d never put our baby in harm's way.” He put his hand on her shoulder then kissed her. “Now that I know you are, in fact, perfectly okay there is one more thing I need to tend to in the quarter before the night is over. I will not be long.”

“You’re not going to go on a witch hunt are you?” she asked with a smirk.

“No, but when I do get my hands on Sophie Deveraux she is-“

“It wasn’t Sophie. It was Agnes.” Katie interrupted him.

“Agnes, Sophie, it’s all the same to me. I’ll slaughter the lot of them.” He told her with a sneer.

“Not if Elijah gets there first.” Rebekah said as she walked into the room and sat down on the couch.

“Come again?” Katie asked with a look at Rebekah.

“Have you found him?” Klaus asked, tucking his hands behind his back.

“He’s been in touch, and he has a plan.” Rebekah answered then looked at Katie. “All he asks is that we take care of you.”

Klaus stalked over to glare down at Rebekah. “I asked you to stay with her, not go on a wild goose chase to find Elijah.”

“I believe she has proven that she doesn’t need a babysitter.” Rebekah argued.

Klaus opened her mouth to say something, but Katie touched his arm keeping a fight from happening. “I’ll be back.” Klaus told Katie then pecked her on the lips and walked away.

With him gone Katie returned to the kitchen and started cleaning up the meal that was no longer worth finishing. Rebekah walked in and leaned on the island. “You are aware that Elijah is still in love with you, right?” she asked.

Katie grabbed a bowl out of the cabinet. “I’m aware.” she grabbed a bag of granola cereal out of another cabinet.

“And you don’t care?” Rebekah asked.

Katie grabbed a gallon of milk out of the icebox and set it on the counter. “Of course I care, Rebekah, but my feelings for him are not what they used to be.”

“Because you’re in love with Klaus?” she asked as she watched Katie pour cereal into the bowl.

“Are you always this nosey or are you just trying to find a way to get Elijah and I back together?” she asked, avoiding the question.

“Just making an attempt at girl talk.” Rebekah answered innocently.

“If you want girl talk then we can talk about hair products, fashion or the incredibly hot Hemsworth brothers.” Katie pointed out as she added milk to the bowl.

“You have a thing for guys with accents, don’t you?” Rebekah asked.

“Yep.” Katie answered then took a bite of cereal.

“So you’re not in love with Klaus?” Rebekah asked.

Katie sighed and let her head fall forward. “I’m not talking about this with you.” she answered then grabbed her bowl and went to her and Klaus’s room.

She was sitting at a table in their room, eating her cereal and writing in her journal when her phone started ringing and she pulled it out of her pocket to see Klaus’s name on the screen. She pressed talk and before she could say hello a woman’s voice hit her ears. “Wait. That’s right I told you what happened. I never tell anybody, but I told you.” Katie frowned and hit the speaker phone button. “And you said something about Sean standing alone against his demons. When he killed those men I thought he must be mentally ill, but… What if it was demons? What if a vampire compelled him?”

“And if so, would you devote yourself to finding the guilty party? Would you sacrifice everything to find out the truth? To what end?” She heard Klaus ask, both of their voices sounded far away from the phone. She could only guess that he pocket dialed her.

“To what end? This is the entire reason I am in New Orleans!” the woman said with a raised voice.

Katie was about to hang up, knowing she shouldn’t be listening in on Klaus’s conversations, but the name that came out of his mouth stopped her. “Cami, whatever lies on the other end of this mystery will only offer you pain. Nothing will bring your brother back. Your only hope for peace is to forget this and move on.” He’d left her to go to Cami?

“No, don’t compel me to forget this.” Cami argued.

“And if I allow you to remember…your knowledge will eat away at you. Your quest for truth will only put you in danger.” Klaus told her.

“You don’t care about me! You just want me to forget this so I can be focused on Marcel. So I’ll be a good little spy for you!” Cami yelled at him. Katie placed her fingertips on her lips, debating on hanging up. She shouldn’t be listening to this, but she couldn’t help herself.

“I need your loyalty, yes, and though that may appear selfish to you the scope of my plan goes far beyond myself. Power aside I am trying to honor my brother and the woman I love.” Klaus told her with an emotional voice. Katie’s heart stopped at Klaus’s confession.

“But what about my brother? My twin brother. We were bonded our whole lives and I know…I know he didn’t just snap. And I need to know who did this and I need to make this right.” Cami pleaded with him. “No, don’t take this away from me!”

“You will do nothing. Your brother was ill. He killed those people and himself and it was a tragedy. All you can do is move on.” Katie assumed he was compelling Cami. “Know that your brother is at peace and that you needn’t worry. I will find out what happened and when I do, I will make sure whoever harmed your brother will suffer. And as for you, tonight, you will sleep and you will dream of a world far better than this one. A world where there is no evil, no demons, and all people desire only to be good.” When she heard the sound of wind against the microphone of the phone she pressed the end button.

She was putting her empty bowl in the dishwasher when she heard Klaus whoosh up behind her then grab her hips, spin her around and kiss her. She kissed him back for a few seconds then turned away and closed the dishwasher. “You…are the perfect ending to a long day.” He whispered into her ear as his hands slipped down her sides and kissed her neck.

“I’m far from perfect.” She told him as she turned in his arms. “I’m nosey.” He gave her a curious look. “You were with Cami earlier and I know that because you pocket dialed me…and I listened.”

He sighed and tilted his head to the side. “How much did you hear?”

“I came in on Cami wondering if her brother was compelled.” She answered. “I shouldn’t have listened and I’m sorry.”

“No worries, love.” He told her knowing that if she heard the whole conversation she heard him say that he loves her. She had no reason to be jealous and it didn’t look like she was mad, just guilty.

“You’re not mad at me?” she asked quietly.

“Of course not.” He told her as he placed his hands on her hips. “Something else I like about you…” he picked her up and sat her on the kitchen counter, “your curiosity.”

“Yeah, well, curiosity killed the cat.” She sighed.

“Thankfully cats have nine lives.” He replied, making her roll her eyes. “Do you have any questions regarding what you heard?”

“What’s the whole story? All I could gather from what I heard is that Cami’s twin brother, Sean, killed people and it may or may not have been because a vampire compelled him to do so.” She told him as she wrapped her legs around him.

“Her brother was a seminary student at Saint Ann’s church in the quarter.” He started. “He went insane and killed nine of his fellow seminary students then himself. According to Cami, he had no reason to do so. He showed no signs or symptoms that one usually does before a psychotic break. She feared that his demons would become her own and was suffering from insomnia and nightmares.”

“So you compelled her to rest easy and stop worrying about her brother because if she didn’t it would lead her right into the mess that is the supernatural community.” She thought out loud putting the pieces together. “You helped her because you care about her.”

“So are you jealous?” he asked with a smirk.

“That you told Cami that you are trying to honor your brother and the woman that you love?” she asked with a small smile. “Nope, I’m good.” She wrapped her arms around his neck and tightened her legs around him.

“So you’re acknowledging that I love you.” he observed.

“You’re doing everything in your power to protect me and your unborn child.” She pointed out as she looked him in the eyes. “And you called me your everything. I’d have to be blind to not see it. I just…” she bit her lips closed and dropped her eyes from his with a shake of her head.

“You’re not ready to say it back.” he finished for her as he slid his hands up from her hips to hold her sides.

“I should be, all things considered, but…no, I’m not.” She admitted with a shake of her head and a shrug. She felt like something was standing in the way of her fully giving in to Klaus, like something was blocking those words from leaving her lips.

“I move at a faster pace than you when it comes to us and that is perfectly fine.” He assured her seeing how much she was struggling with the idea of love even after everything they had been through. It was going to take time for her to let herself love again. “I don’t want you to say it unless you mean it.”

“And that…Big Bad Wolf, is one of the many, many things I like about you.” she moved her arms from around his neck to rest her hands on the sides of it. “You’re patient with me even though patience isn’t your strong suit.” He placed his hand on her cheek and opened his mouth to say something, but changed his mind and closed it. She knew he wanted to say it, but if he did she would feel pressured to say it back and neither of them wanted that. So instead, he pressed his lips to hers, both of them pouring themselves into it resulting in him whooshing then upstairs to their room.

[biggest-stupidhead]

Path Walker (Levi x OC)

Summary: Emory comes to terms with the events of Trost and what this means for her future. (I did a slight time skip and skipped over the Trost arc) 

Warnings: Death, trauma 

Word Count: 2K 

My eyes watered as I watched the bodies burn. The scent of burning flesh filled my nose as I knelt down onto one knee. I couldn't tell if they were emotional tears or just watering because of the smell. It was strange but my nose was really sensitive lately, my eyes flickered over to see Annie, Bertoldt and Riener standing not too far away. I turned to see Jean to my right, he kissed his closed fist as tears ran down his cheeks. Connie sniffled loudly and Sasha hiccuped. I cleared my throat as a few rogue tears slipped down my own cheeks. The last 24 hours were arguably the worst in my life. I had watched countless comrades fall to the titans, and now Eren was apparently some freak of nature. Well I mean I knew he was a bit unhinged but I definitely didn't think the dude was a titan.

I stood, not bothering to brush the ashes off of my white trousers. I turned and stalked down the empty street, which had served as a battle ground earlier. My hair swayed as I made my way back to HQ where we would be bunking for the night. I paused at the sight of a tavern, the warm light that seeped out of the saloon style doors and the sound of hearty laughter reminded me of my upbringing. I was used to adults being drunk, and I knew how to avoid them as well. I lingered outside the door a moment longer before continuing. As I walked I stuffed my hands into my pockets of the leather trainee jacket. The night was cold despite it being summer, or maybe it was in my mind. Regardless I shivered and picked up the pace. I was exhausted and ready to put all of this behind me, fulfill my promise and all that bull shit.

"Hey Emory! Where are you going?" A sweet voice called from behind me. I turned around and felt my eyes widen at the sight of the golden girl, Krista Lenz jogging to catch up with me.

"Hey." I murmured when she caught up, turning to continue.

"What's wrong?" she asked as she matched my pace.

"Nothing, just tired." I lied as she laid a gentle hand on my forearm.

"Did you hear? We're shipping out in the morning for the Scouting Regiment's head quarters!" she said, those baby blue eyes shining in the moonlight.

"Yeah I heard." I said, licking my lips as I turned to face forwards again.

"I'm a bit nervous but I hope that they let Eren join still after... you know" she trailed off as I pursed my lips in thought.

"They have to let him, he's sure to be a useful tool. " I said grimly. Her grip tightened on my arm and her eyes widened.

"Right, I just hope that he can persuade the jury tomorrow at the hearing. " she said, a bit of an edge on her usually light tone. I wasn't sure what to say, so I stayed quiet, the two of us walking down the dark streets. We reached the large castle, and entered the main room was empty, but a warm light spilled from the mess hall. Our eyes met and I knew that she wanted to peek in the room as well, so we both veered off course to poke our heads into the cavernous room.

"-I think that should count as an assist! I clearly had the situation handled." a loud voice boomed, breaking the relative silence of the building. Krista flinched against my side, causing me to let out a small huff. She looked up and smiled bashfully.

"No, I  had the situation under control, besides Levi had the most kills." a feminine voice cut in, and the sound of glasses clinking and grunts of agreement. Krista peered around the thick stone corner and gripped my wrist as she eavesdropped. Levi huh? Couldn't be my Levi, could it? Only one way to find out. I poked my head around the corner and immediately cursed my curiosity. Sure enough a group of soldiers, scouts to be exact sat in the mess hall drinking mugs of golden ale. All except for one person, Levi opted for a dainty cup of what I assumed was tea. My heart hammered in my chest and I felt like I was going to ralph at the sight of the steely eyed man. I swallowed and ducked back behind the wall, Krista's grip tightened on my wrist.

"What's wrong? Are you going to faint? Please don't faint!" she begged shaking me as she spoke, my vision swam as I remembered my past in the underground. Krista raised her voice as her concern for me grew, her blue eyes were wide as she continued to drill me with questions.

"Answer me Emory please, I know we're about the same size but I won't be able to carry you if you pass out!" she cupped my cheek as I slumped forward and buried my burning face in the crook of her neck. A shaky breath escaped my lips as I hugged Krista and fought off the tears. I know I know it's dramatic but usually I didn't experience these emotions. I usually turned tail and ran in the opposite direction when I thought of Levi and the note that our relationship ended on. But I like to believe that the fresh trauma and the old trauma was a bit overwhelming in the moment.

"Woah Emory! Please tell me what's wrong so I can help you!" I shook my head and swallowed thickly.

"I don't know what came over me, I think I just need to get to bed." I said pulling away from the smaller girl. She gripped my biceps as she watched me straighten up and inhale deeply.

"Oi, who's out there? Cadets are supposed to be in bed." the callous voice echoed off the stone walls and I felt the feeling of dread wash over me again. Krista looked at me with wide blue eyes before answering shakily.

"S-Sorry, we were just on our way there actually! Pardon the intrusion!" she called around the corner without looking, praying that they would leave it at that. Silence. I grabbed her wrist and pulled her past the door with a sudden rush of confidence. She stumbled after me and I felt like Ymir, who was known for hauling the poor girl around. I felt like I was wading through molasses as I walked past the huge doors, my eyes wide and a bead of sweat rolling down the back of my neck. Krista yelped as I gripped her wrist and we stole up the carpeted staircase and up towards our rooms. I released her at the top of the stairs and continued to walk briskly towards my quarters.

"Emory, oh my god are you okay? Please I'm really concerned about you!" Krista called after me as I pulled the door open to my room that I shared with Annie open. She ducked in behind me and quietly closed the door.

"Please you can talk to me, I'm your friend." Krista begged, as she moved to sit next to me on the bed.

"I'm sorry Krista, I think that everything just hit me and..." I trailed off, wow I just realized that I am in fact a terrible liar. I heaved a sigh of defeat.

"Do you really want the truth Krista?" I asked, turning to face her with a grim expression, her face was open and accepting as she nodded slowly.

"Please that's all I am asking for." she said, turning to face me full on, I mirrored her so that our knees knocked, licking my lips I prepared myself. Krista would be the only other person besides Erwin to know that I am from the Underground.

"I...I am not from around here, I had to....make sacrifices to get into the trainee corps." I paused gauging her reaction, she nodded understandingly, her eyes urging me to continue.

"I lived in the Underground before I managed to score a deal, citizenship if I agreed to join the Survey Corps." I said, clenching my jaw as I gauged her reaction.

"The Underground?" she said with wide eyes, there it was the pity. It was clear across her face and I hated it.

"I don't want your pity." I said, my eyes drifting to the window to look at the starry sky. She let out a shaky breath but nodded in understanding.

"So did you know Levi?" she asked, desperate to hear more.

"I guess you could say that." I chuckled, my eyes falling to my lap where my hands were laced together.

"We um...we knew each other. " I admitted, now she would know. I was weak, the sound of his voice was enough to throw me off balance. How pathetic. I clicked my tongue and swiveled my head to face her again. She was silent, her eyes wide and shining with...admiration? She opened her mouth to speak but before she could say anything she was interrupted by the door creaking open. Annie stood awkwardly in the threshold, her own blue eyes scoping out the situation. Krista stood up and sighed.

"Well I had better be off, I'm sure Ymir is wondering where I am!" She sent me one last look, I couldn't quite decipher what she was feeling as she brushed past Annie and out into the dark hall. Annie shut the door after her and stalked into the room, bringing her over powering scent with her. I couldn't help but wrinkle my nose as she peeled her soiled jacket off of her shoulders. She raised a delicate brow at the expression on my face.

"What?" she asked, her voice hinting at her annoyance and exhaustion.

"I-" In yet another moment of confidence I decided to ask her about her smell.

"I was wondering why you smell the way you smell." it came off ruder than expected but how are you supposed to ask someone that question without being rude? I certainly don't know.

"What smell?" She asked, obviously self conscious, she lifted her arms and smelled her pits.

"I can't explain it but I just noticed it a few weeks ago." I shrugged as I watched her pick up her jacket and inhale deeply.

"I don't smell anything, is it a bad smell? Do other people talk about how I smell?" she asked with her eyes every so slightly wider than normal as she pulled at her usual hoodie. I held my hands up and waved them in an attempt to calm her down.

"No I mean I haven't mentioned it to anyone, and nobody has asked me about it so I assume that it's just me." I said, watching as her posture became more rigid.

"Well what does it smell like? I would expect at least Sasha to be able to smell whatever it is as well. She's got a great nose." Annie asked skeptically as I chewed on my lower lip.

"I guess if I had to describe it...I would say you smell like this crazy mix of herbs and...dead leaves?" I said, unsure of how to describe her musk. Annie's usual stoney expression fell right off her face as she blinked at me with surprise.

"Am I really the only one that smells like that?" she asked as a shadow fell over her face.

"No, Ymir smells weird and so does Bertholdt and Reiner. And Eren come to think of it." I said, my head tilting to the side as I took in her thoughtful expression.

"Odd." she spoke tautly as she slid off her white pants and into some sweats before falling into bed. I stood and tensely undressed, I was fatigued both mentally and physically. A sudden wave of embarrassment washed over me when I remembered the way I had dragged Krista in front of the superior officers. I fell into bed, staring up at the wooden rafters until I reluctantly slipped into unconsciousness.

[blackmissfrizzle]

Part of Your World

Characters: Dean Winchester x black!reader

Summary: Its basically a Little Mermaid AU (still in the SPN realm) with a dash of African mythology.

Warnings: A couple of puns, because I couldn’t help myself lol

A/N: My love of Disney caused me to write another fic based on one of my fave princesses. Also it was inspired by this post I saw and then I had to do my own research, because I was so interested. I need more African mythology in fantasy! Anyways, as usual this is for the black girls that done feel seen in the show or the fandom! I hope you enjoy!

Humans were bad. They were selfish, careless, and evil. Or that’s what you were supposed to believe, according to your mother. But to you they were interesting and not as bad as your mother made them out to be. Just like merpeople some were as your mother described, but most were good or at least trying to be better. That’s why you had to save them.

One day when you were swimming up to the surface and saw a bunch of protectors of the land. Those things they called cars were flashing red and blue lights. There was a dead body on the shore and the person’s wounds were unnatural for another human to cause. So, naturally you investigated.

Since the time you were a teen, you would sneak on land to watch the humans up close and personal. Your Aunt Iliana was the sea witch. She gifted you with a necklace that allowed you walk on land. According to her, your destiny was on land, which is why your mother banned you from swimming too close to land and keeping you away from your aunt.

This time you were making your trek to land every night. Scuttle, your skin-walker friend allowed you to work at his bar and you hoped to catch some gossip on the murders. Tonight, was busier than usual. You were running from one end of the bar to the other and not catching a word about the killings. That was until you heard an alluring voice. It was deep, slightly gravelly, but smooth and could easily lull you to sleep.

“Dude, I’m putting money it’s a witch. That’s the only reasonable explanation.” Dean argued with his brother. They had been in town for 2 days and no leads whatsoever. All they had was a bunch of guys who suddenly had a turn of bad luck, lost all their money and died of on land drowning.

Not only were you attracted to this man’s voice, but he was looking into the murders too! You had to make yourself known. Turning around just in time you saw him finish his drink. He was the most perfect man you’ve seen. His green eyes rivaled the coral reefs vibrant color. His lips were unexpectedly plump for a man of his shade. His jaw was set hard, but you could tell he had a soft nature.

“Stop staring and talk to the man!” Scuttle encouraged you while tending to other patrons.

“Stop being a guppy, Y/N!” You told yourself before making your way to the man. Pointing at his empty glass, you asked the stranger if he wanted another drink.

Dean had to do a double take. The beautiful bartender was talking to him. He noticed her all night. When she was walking up and down the bar, she was singing to herself and he thought she had a beautiful voice. Some of the time Dean would tune Sam out just to listen to her.

“Yes, please. Can you make it a double?”

Shaking your head yes, you brought out the good liquor. Scuttle would most likely kill you, but you needed information and the best way to get it was making this beautiful stranger’s lips loose. “On the house,” you mentioned when you saw he was about to object for the pricey whiskey.

“Thank you.” He gave you a loop-sided smile and you walked away, not wanting to push too quickly. “Wait,” he called out, pulling something out of his pocket. It was a picture of him in some fancy suit saying FBI Agent Dean Plant. “I’m Agent Plant and this is Agent Page,” he pointed to the taller man next to him, “have you seen any of these gentlemen here?”

Dean stared at the red-haired beauty as she stared at the photos of the male victims. It wasn’t like him to be so mesmerized by a woman that he didn’t even notice her pointing out the latest victim.

“Yeah, he was here. I remembered because he seemed so sad, so I decided to check on him.”

Agent Plant perked up and leaned forward on the bar, “Do you know what had him so upset?”

You wanted to look at Dean, but his green eyes made your stomach flutter like a school of fish, so you paid attention to his partner. “Um, something about how he made a bad deal and lost all his money and his girlfriend.”

The two brothers turned towards each other and silently communicated that they both thought it was a demon deal. Quickly, they both stood up and paid for the drinks. “Thank you! We’ll be back tomorrow.” Dean smiled at you before following his brother out the bar.

For a while you stood there in a trance. He was coming back tomorrow! You would have to tell Scuttle to take you shopping for some more clothes.

“Don’t do it.”

“Huh?” Scuttle’s voice startled you to the present.

“He’s a hunter and human. Both things your mother hates the most. Secretly help them and go on about your life.” Scuttle warned, then attended to another bar patron.

--

Too bad you didn’t listen to Scuttle, because now you were in trouble.

The following night, Dean and Sam came back they seemed discouraged. Turned out their lead was a bust. No demon deals occurred in this town according to Crowley.

Throughout the night, you would eavesdrop on their conversation about the case and it was becoming clearer to you what exactly were killing these men. Because of a festival that happened earlier that day, the bar was slammed, and you didn’t get to tip off Dean and Sam about what they were hunting before they left.

Time to time your best friends, Sebastian and Floyd would escort you on land to ensure your safety. No one wanted to feel the wrath of your mother if something bad were ever to happen to you.

“Fellas, I need one of you to cover for me.” You leaned across the bar already batting your eyes. It was always a struggle to get these two to do something without a little coercion.

“Why?” Sebastian ran his hands through his dreads, he was already suspecting you were up to no good.

“So, I can tell the hunters what’s killing the humans.” You rushed out, then tried to leave but Sebastian stopped you.

“Uh huh. No way, missy. We all agreed that you would do it without outing yourself.” Sebastian was the harder of the two to convince. Being your mother’s court advisor made him be more overprotective of you.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Y/N. Humans are already scary, but hunters are terrifying.” Floyd shivered at the idea of talking to one. He could already imagine his tail as a trophy on some hunter’s wall.

You ruffled your friend’s kinky blue curls. “Don’t be guppy, Floyd.” Finished messing up his hair, you ran out the bar. Better to ask for forgiveness than permission. It was always that way with those two. You wanted to do something, they would say it was a bad idea, and then you would do it anyway. Those two should’ve learned by now.

You didn’t have to go far since Scuttle’s bar was on the beach and Dean and Sam were already there. It looked like they were inspecting something, when you saw hands made of water grab onto the two and drug them into the sea.

It was her; you knew it. Shedding your clothes, you dived into the water. You couldn’t bask in the water like you usually would after a day on land. Cutting through the current you found the men drowning and the mysterious water hands gone. She didn’t need to kill them instantly. The depths she brought them to would do the job for her. She just didn’t count on you to come in and save the day.

You were a lot stronger in water than on land, so it was easy to drag both men up to the surface. Hopefully, she didn’t have eyes on you. She had eyes everywhere in the water.

You took them to your hidden grotto you used to come onto land or just to think alone. Using your powers to manipulate water, you expelled the water from their lungs.

Dean was the first one coming into consciousness. It was the same voice from last night. The bartender, he thought. He sat up to thank her, but she wasn’t there. The only thing he thought he saw was a fin.

“Sammy!?” Dean rolled over to his brother. He slapped him to jolt him awake.

Sam sat up, out of sorts for a moment. “Dude, what the hell was that?” He dragged a hand over his face.

Dean shook his head. “Man, I don’t know.”

The brothers sat there confused not knowing what the hell they were gonna do.

--

You watched the brothers leave the grotto from behind a rock formation. Once they were gone, you emerged from your hiding spot.

“Helping hunters?” She clicked her tongue. “I’m disappointed in you. I thought a daughter of Cora’s would know better.” Mami Wata stood above you in all white, draped in the most expensive jewels, stoking the head of her snake. This was the first time she appeared to you and you were in awe despite the circumstances.

“You’re killing innocent men. What else am I supposed to do?” Normally, you would speak to her with respect, but this situation did not call for it. People were dying.

“They’re not innocent. I promised them riches in exchange for fidelity. They broke the agreement.”

She was right. Those men did make the deals of their own free will, but what she was doing didn’t sit right with you. “But you didn’t have to kill them. Other Mami Watas leave them broke.”

“Who are you to question me?!” Her voice echoed, causing some of the rocks to shake. “Sorry,” Mami Wata regained her composure when she saw you tremble in fear. “I like you, Princess Y/N. You’re strong-spirited, but I can’t have you in my way, but I also promised your mother I would protect her offspring.”

“Then what now?” You crossed your arms with an attitude. Mami Wata released the python that was wrapped around her into the water.

The green creature slithered up to your neck and squeezed tightly. “It’ll be hard for you to help the hunters without that beautiful voice of yours.” In a panic, you clutched your neck trying to speak, but it was already too late. Mami Wata already took your voice.

The snake went back to its satisfied owner. “A little piece advice,” Mami Wata looked at you with pity. “The one with the green eyes, don’t fall for him. The pale ones are always the worst.” She chuckled as she made her exit.

Even though, you didn’t have your voice, you had to find a way to warn the hunters.

--

Sam and Dean were going crazy. All they could come up with is that they were possibly dealing with the god, Poseidon and even that sounded far-fetched for them.

They were knee-deep in research when there was a knock on their door. Both brothers grabbed their guns and Sam looked out the peephole. “It’s the bartender from the other night.”

Dean shoved his little brother out the way. “Smooth, dude.” Sam mumbled at a flustered Dean. Opening the door, Dean greeted you. In return you waved back. “Hey, Y/N, right?”

You shook your head vigorously, excited that he remembered your name.

“What can I help you with?” He asked, looking at you expectantly. Oh shit! How were you gonna let him now you were there to help?

An idea popped in your head. You held up a finger and brought out the cellphone Scuttle bought for you. Unlocking the phone, all the words were gibberish to you when they shouldn’t be. You were fluent in all languages. Mami Wata must’ve cursed all your modes of communications. Son of a bitch!

“Woah!” Dean lifted his arms as you pushed pass him when you saw a photo of one of the victims. Grabbing it you motioned to the boys you could help. They were confused to why you weren’t speaking and even more confused on how you knew another victim.

“Dean, I think she’s connected somehow.” You eagerly waved the photo in agreeance. Sam crouched down to assure you he wasn’t a threat. “Did you lose your voice because you know who did this?” Sam clapped his hands in victory when you confirmed his suspicion.

Dean wanted to believe you were there to help, but he could never be too careful. He’s been burned too many times before. “How do we know you’re not the one doing the killings?”

Pinching your nose and pointing to the boys, you reenacted their drowning and you pulling them out. “You’re the one who saved us? How?” Dean scanned you up and down, there was no way you had the strength to pull him AND his brother. Well, no way if you were only human.

Of course, they wouldn’t believe you. To them you were a human woman. You puckered your face like you seen humans do to imitate fish, then you pointed to your closed legs and made swimming motions with your hands.

“No way.” Sam thought out loud.

“What,” Dean asked, still in the dark.

Sam rolled his eyes. “Man, you were always bad at charades.”

“I’m not!” Dean sputtered like a child.

“I think she’s a mermaid.”

“Sam, don’t you think we would’ve heard of them being real?” Dean couldn’t wrap his head around the idea.

Dean’s disbelief caused an argument between the boys. They were too busy with trying to be right that they didn’t notice you taking off your clothes. There was only one way to end this argument. Just in your bra you tapped your seashell necklace and prepared for the fall.

At the sound of something falling, Sam and Dean stopped arguing. “Oh shit!” They simultaneously said, realizing Sam was right.

It was uncomfortable to have your tail and not be near water, so you transformed back to legs in forth of them. When Sam and Dean noticed you were naked down below, they quickly turned their backs to you.

After you were dressed properly, you tapped both on their broad shoulders. Questions were flying at you. Was it another mermaid behind the killings? How many mermaids are there? Are you a good or bad mermaid? How do you have sex?

You pointed to the photos to direct the hunters’ attention (more Dean than Sam) back to the case. “Oh yeah, the case.” Dean sheepishly rubbed the back of his head. “You said you knew who’s behind the murders, right?”

Nodding yes, you began thinking of how to act out Mami Wata. Jumping up and down you got the boys’ attention when you figured it out.

You mimicked the motion parents do when they rock their babies. “Cradle? Rocking?” Dean guessed.

“Baby?!” Sam called out. You smiled at his correct guess, but that wasn’t the word they needed, it was only a connection.

Pointing between you and your imaginary baby, you hoped they would get it.

“Mom?”

“Mother?”

“Mama?”

“Mommy?” Dean threw out. You squeezed his cheeks and gave him a kiss.

Dean gave Sam a superior look. “And you said I was bad at charades.” Sam ignored his brother’s smug smirk and paid attention to you searching for something. Your eyes lit up when you found it. This should be easy.

“Water?” Dean asked and it earned him another kiss from you.  He smiled victoriously at Sam. Now he wanted to play charades with you all the time.

Combining the two words, Sam asked you, “Mommy water?” Close enough. You knew they weren’t familiar with the dialect. You nodded your head yes and Sam began searching it. “Okay, I think I got it.” Sam announced after a few minutes. “Mami Wata?” He looked to you for approval. You jumped over to him and placed a big kiss on Sam’s cheek.

“Shut up,” Dean told Sam before he could say something smart. “What are we dealing with?”

“Okay, lore says Mami Wata is an African water goddess. She can take an appearance of a mermaid or human. Either way she’s extremely beautiful, like Aphrodite beautiful.”

Dean hovered above his brother. “Enough with the backstory. Why is she killing dudes?”

Sam scrolled down further until he found what he wanted. “I think I got it. Mami Wata appears to some men and promise them riches and good fortune as long as they remain faithful to her. Cheat and you’ll lose everything. Sometimes even your life.”

“Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. How do we kill her?”

Sam leaned back and sighed at what he read. “Wooden stake dipped in the blood of one of their living victims.”

Dean started browsing the local newspaper. He remembered something sticking out. He shook the paper when he found the article about a man winning the two million dollars lottery. “Boom! I think we got our next victim.” He started grabbing his belongings. “Sammy, Y/N, let’s roll.”

--

It was always a set-up. The men Mami Wata made deals with were notorious cheaters. She knew they would break the deal and cheat. With some teamwork, preparation, and some luck the three of you were able to kill her before she got to her next victim.

“You know it would be nice to have a mermaid on Team Free Will.” Dean desperately wanted to spend more time with you.

You intertwined your fingers with Dean’s. “I wish, but I belong in the ocean. Princess duties.”

Dean nodded his head to himself. “Well, let me leave you with a parting gift.”

Dean’s lips were less than an inch away from yours when you heard your mom’s voice. “Y/N!” She was flanked by a sulking Sebastian and Floyd.

You wasted no time going to her. For her to be on land meant you were deep in trouble. You gave Dean one more glance, taking in his features for the last time.

--

Tears feel from your eyes as Sebastian and Floyd tried to comfort you. Your mother really banned you from the kingdom. Sneaking to land? Forgivable. Almost kissing a human? Forgivable. But killing her goddess? Unforgivable, apparently.

Your friends assured you the queen would change her mind. Despite your different beliefs, you were her favorite because you were so similar. But how long would it take for her to change her mind? Your mother could hold a grudge.

“Y/N?” Dean called into the grotto. Behind him was Sam and Scuttle. “What’s wrong?” He sat by you and pulled you into a hug.

Sebastian splashed some water on him.

“What the fuck, dude?!”

“Don’t you think you’ve helped enough? Both of you?” Sebastian glared at both brothers.

“What did we do?” Sam asked, a little scared of the abnormally buff merman.

Splashing some water with your tail, you admonished your friend. “Don’t mind Seb, he’s always crabby.”

“I get crabby when my princess and friend gets banished because she helped hunters.”

Sticking up a finger, you corrected him. “For your information I got in trouble for killing Mami Wata.”

Sam knelt by you, feeling horrible that him and Dean were the cause of your current predicament “Is it true?”

“That I got banned? Yeah, but it’s not your fault. I knew this could happen. I’m just bummed I have to find a new home.”

Scuttle laid a hand on your shoulder. “Y/N/N, you always have a home with me.”

Sam and Dean traded looks with each other, this was their fault and they needed to fix it. “Or…” Dean drew out. “You can live with us, hunt with us.” Dean saw the debate in your eyes. “That’s only if you want to. No pressure.” He added nervously.

When your eyes lit up, Floyd began shaking his head no. “Y/N, nuh uh! There’s vampires, werewolves, ghosts, and demons!”

“Stop being a guppy, Floyd!” Your Aunt Iliana chuckled as she swam up with her dolphin, Pica. “This is where she’s meant to be.” She gave you a knowing smirk.

Her prophecy! You remembered. Sliding back in the water you gave your aunt and friends hugs and kisses goodbye. You promised them to visit as much as you could.

With a press to your necklace, your tail turned into legs and with some magic from Aunt Iliana you had clothes on this time.

“Ready?” Dean offered his hand.

You put your hand in his. “Yeah.” It sucked to be kicked out of your world, but now you could be a part of Dean’s.

Tagging: @titty-teetee @chonisberonica @awshitdaviddonedonethisshitagain @cocooned-butterfly @babypink224221 @deanscroissant @deansbbysblog​ @nervouspetsonanime​ @nerd-lovely​

[midas-or-khaos]

Wrong place, Wrong time. Part 1

God of war x borrower oc story

“-And remember, DON’T touch anything! Reavers aren’t exactly a clean bunch,” a gurgling followed. “Ugh, really bad at keeping anything clean in fact.” The poor man really could be a worry wart at times (and a clean freak as always).

“Sindri, I’ll be fine. I promise! Cross my heart and everything. The whetstone will probably be kept somewhere safe if it’s precious enough to be stolen, so it’ll hopefully be clean when I find it.”

“Oh. Well, I hadn’t thought of that. Just...stay safe ok? And don’t get caught!”

“I won’t, I never do. See you soon!”

Reluctantly the dwarf answered,“See you soon jojo.” But the poor dwarf’s knee couldn’t stop shaking, thinking about worst case scenarios. Jojo knew he’d just have to prove poor Sindri wrong once again. Maybe one of these days he’d actually learn there was no use worrying himself into a frenzy. Taking off, the 5 inch figure wasn’t stopped as he scurried along natural ledges in walls, and began his descent into the heart of the earth.

Jojo didn’t see what all the worry was for. One of the few perks of being a borrower was often big folk like Reavers or monsters were always too busy looking ahead for bean sized people, that they never looked far enough down to see him. He knew the dwarf didn’t like asking him for help, even though the boy often came to Sindri’s shop outside ‘Fafnir’s storeroom’ (or whatever he called it) asking for challenges and new borrowing spots.

Most borrowers would call it suicide to be talking to beans and other big folk, ESPECIALLY with all the new monsters that have started popping up recently. Hel walkers they’re called apparently. But Jojo wasn’t most. He’d sought out his favourite Dwarf and brother when his parents died drowning in the lake of nine when the waters suddenly flooded, leaving their 8 year old son to fend for himself. Not immediately, obviously. No, at that point he was still a weedy little scaredy cat himself, not able to be even in the same area when footstep started to shake the earth. It could only last so long though. He hadn’t been old enough to be taken out borrowing before being left alone, and supplies ran low quickly. So, spurt of the desperate, when he saw the two set up shop outside his home in the foothills, the child decided to stride right out into the open and ask for food.

4 years later and he still never regretted that decision. Still scrawny, “the side effect of being young” said Brok, but definitely more confident. Brok taught him a lot of that confidence (and a whole lot of swear words too, despite Sindri’s attempts to undo his brother’s work) and Sindri taught him kindness and generosity. The generosity was only spent on the brothers, because who else was he going to see? No borrower would trust another that hung around beans, and Sindri wouldn’t let him be found by anyone if he had anything to say about it, but kindness he tried to show all IF he could without getting sliced in half.

Gathering focus for the change in environment, the world became darker. White, natural light was flittering out, slowly being replaced by the ethereal glow of blue crystals bouncing off liquid smooth stone corridors leading into a fatal drop. An underground ravine. Nothing had shown its face yet, though the odd grunt of some undead beastie would make itself known now and then. Being so small meant there was no need to cross the water below, or find ways to get the chain ropes down so as to climb across. All he had to do was stick close to the roof where stalactites could be leapt between till he reached some valley in the wall to rest. Nothing too hard. Looking for the fist place to jump, a low hanging spine was just a couple of feet away (to Jojo); taking a leap of faith, the boy managed to snag the tail end. Right, next one. Leaping like a lemur the drop was easily avoided, and soon something came into view. Sunlight yellow was beginning to mix with the unnatural blue, and Jojo knew there was an opening into the outside world around the corner. Good, finally he would be able to see, though he would be easier to spot in the illumination of day.

Sindri

How had Brok convinced him to let Jojo go treasure hunting alone? So many traps, monsters, ancients even! “He’ll be fine” said Brok when the two had discussed it together during one of their rare ‘chats for important matters’. So nonchalantly Brok threw out, “Kid’s never been seen before, he ain’t gonna be now!” We’ll that was just testing fate wasn’t it! The rhythmic thumping of hammer to metal was doing nothing to take his mind off the matter, and a few too many near misses to his thumb told Sindri he wasn’t going to get any real work done at this rate. Perhaps he should have a break and go visit Ivaldi’s workshop?

“Hey Sindri!”

“Agh!!!!” Both hammer and work went flying overhead, just missing the flat of his skull. The lithe boy in question at least had the gall to go red, abashed as he walked over to the Dwarf’s workbench, scratching at the buzzed fuzz across the side his head.

“Sorry.”

“Well you should be! That could’ve hurt you OR me, and all the infections that could get in-”

“Boy, be careful.”

The source of the voice sat further back up the slate corridor, hidden in shadow, hawkish gold glowed beneath a heavy brow.

“Sorry father.” Atreus called back to the hidden figure.

With meaningful strides, the figure came into the light of day, bleach white skin, jet black beard and a crimson tattoo striped across an eye setting the figure apart as none other than his worst fear. Kratos. Why? Why were these two here?

“What brings you two to my place of work to scare me?”

Leaning on the edge of his (freshly cleaned) work bench, the spritely youth explained with excitement, “We’re gonna get that whetstone you wanted!”

Shit! He’d mentioned that to them, hadn’t he? Why had they come to fulfill that promise now, when they seemed so disinterest in before?

“O-o-ooooohhhhh yeahhhhhhh, THAT whetstone. Well...”

Atreus leaned in with a head tilt and a brow lifted, “...well? What’s wrong, did you find it already?”

“No-“

“-No? Then what’s the problem?”

“Speak clearly, we have come for the promise of improvements.” Straight to the point, both father and son were on edge now.

Damn it, he was digging a hole for himself again. Stupid mouth. Obviously, if the two of them went in those mines, there was a chance his kid would get spotted and wearing that rat skin outfit, either of the pair could mistake Jojo for an actual rat and hit him with something. Oooooo, that’s horrifying, don’t think about that! Ughhhh don’t vomit! Don’t-...But On the other hand, there was a chance that the father/son duo could clear the way and make it safer for his boy to get back. And more searching eyes makes for less work. Sindri would just have to encourage them not to be too... liberal with their killing.

“Yes the offer is still there, but you must heed this warning.”

“You mentioned no warning before, why?” The irritation lacing the bestial man’s tone didn’t keep itself hidden, growls billowing out that barrel chest. The dwarf didn’t shirk away like a turtle. Not at all.

“O-oh-well-I didn’t know before. Bbbbut I got new information...from Brok. He said not tooooooo... kill the ratssssss?”

The growls took a higher pitch.

“Errrrr, ok? Are the rats protected are something?” Quizzed Atreus, bringing the blacksmith off the subject of the terrifying god before him. A perfect excuse.

“YES! Yes, sorry, the rats are the protected subjects of Freya. Wouldn’t want to upset her right?!”

“Oh! Well, she never mentioned that when we met her.” These two met FREYA! Of course they had, who was he kidding, they’d met everyone and probably started a fight with them too.

“Must’ve slipped her mind, now hurry up! Don’t want any drauger or wolves to get their disgusting hands all over it! Otherwise it’ll be so dirty even I won’t be able to clean it!”

The excuse was enough. The two turned (but not before the kid’s enthusiastic good bye) and disappeared below the cramped passage into the inky black mines, their footsteps echoing out.

“Please let this be the right idea.” Huffed out Sindri with stale, held breath, shaking his head at his own recklessness.

Jojo

Making the last of his descent down the sheer cliff walls, vibrant green broke the dead stone and made life at the edge of the darkness. The sweet ache from overworked tendons and muscles began the slow process of slipping away, fresh air and bird song rejuvenating the boy’s ambition to find his prize, a grin pulling at bubbly cheeks. He was halfway now! Strolling through the ivy, form barely making a rustle, sunlight illuminated the boy’s way through the thickets. Brok mentioned that before he reached the main chamber where the actual traps and treasure was kept, there was a ‘small’ field for him to cross with bits of precious metals along the way. Jojo knew he’d need to make height soon in order to know where he was going, but this time it’d have to be calculated; all black stood out in all this greenery. Now where to go? Rocks. He could use the rocks as an outpost to look out: dark coloured, easy to climb and easy to blend into. Just a matter of reaching it. Strolling through the ivy, the speckled light beaming on the crumbled earth was just enough to guide the way forward, boots barely making a sound.

Squawk

Stopping dead, a cold trail prickled along his back. The boy made the slowest tilt back possible to peak throught the canopy, trying to avoid detection. Too late, looking with a ghostly green eye, a monsterous raven was stalking with keen interest, perched almost serenely upon it’s watch point. Ravens weren’t notorious borrower hunters, seeing people like him often as a chore to catch and consume. But rats...rats were their favourite.

And he was dressed as one.

Atreus

“Father, what do you think had Sindri so shook?”

“Anything, boy. The dwarf has a talent for fear.” No denying that, agreed the doe eyed boy. Sindri did fear just about everything.

Crouching did nothing for the chalk giant, disgruntled grunts sounding out amongst the overhead drips of droplets every time his bald head scraped the sandpaper rough ceiling. It’s one of the few examples in life that made Atreus happy to be short. Yowls were coming from further into the mineshaft, but drauger were a minor setback, easily dispatched.

“Be on your guard boy, we are nearing danger.”

Jojo

“Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck-“ How could one bird be more persistent then all the drauger in the world?

SSSSSQQQQUUUUUAAAAAARRRRRRRKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!

Too close! Every attack was only wearing the borrower down more; the saving grace from this endless stream of dive bombs was that in the bird’s haste, it made enough flapping to give its location away at all times, making it easier to dodge. But now Jojo was lost, lost and close to just falling down if his quaking limbs were anything to go by.

Atreus

“Well that was easy.”

A sagely look was drawn toward Atreus, not angry, but not impressed, “Easy because there are two of us, boy, but don’t let your guard down because you perceive an enemy as ‘easy’.”

Always one to lecture. “Yes sir.”

The cave entrance as coming into sight, stoic father and brash son walking side by side. With electrical arrows at the ready and frosty axe drawn the odd pair walked into daylight, sun illuminating the thick blood staining their skin and wares. Both were ready for any kind of battle ahead, be it fierce or simple.

Well, except for the kind of battle that they stumbled onto.

“Father? What’s wrong with that bird?” Quizzed Atreus, looking up, but Kratos was busy scanning the wooded field

“It hunts for prey boy, pay it no mind.” No beating around the bush.

“But it looks like one of Odin’s crows.”

The barely there expression of strained, chalk temples and widening, heavy set eyes might as well have been a scream.“Shoot it down.”

This rarity was not lost on the boy, heart pounding in response. If his ever-stoic dad was frightened, this was more of a danger than he had anticipated. Wasting no time, Atreus locked on as the bird went for another dive, and let loose a wizzing arrow. It fired true puncturing the breast and punching through to the other side with a resounding crack of the rib cage. The creature never hit its mark, breaking apart in a surprising burst of green flame, but never actually setting anything on fire. The witchcraft of Odin was strange indeed.

The boy couldn’t feel pleasure out of his elegant kill, still too shaken by what he’d seen. Atreus knew better than to ask his father what was wrong, the man would switch on him like a rabid dog driven mad by rabies if any fear was ever acknowledged.

“We go on, boy.”

Kratos took the lead, heading further uphill into the tree trunk horizon, sun spilling over the crest and illuminating some of the lower valley where the boy stood. Atreus made no move to follow. If he was to get answers, it would have to be now whilst his father charged on unaware. Tip toeing over to where the bird would have fallen, eyes trained on his father, the archer found his arrow wedged fast into the soft earth with wandering hands. Turning his gaze for just a moment to inspect his find, there were signs of burns, suggesting that the animal must’ve been made of pure magic; probably a spy of some kind if Odin had anything to do with it, the man was notoriously suspicious and crafty (even all seeing as his mother had mentioned) so would want to know at all times what was going on in midguard. Hold on... pulling the tip of the spear out, a rat skin sat pierced at the end. Weird thing was though, it was clean, even looking tanned on the inside like some kind of weird miniature hooded tunic! This wasn’t an animal the crow had caught and killed, but clearly was worn by the thing that the bird was after on the ground. Wait... Sindri mentioned not killing any rats, but this one was allowed to die and be made into clothes, meaning Freya wasn’t protecting the rats at all. Sindri was lying, he was protecting whoever wore this tunic-

“BOY! COME!”

Oops. He’d zoned out too long.

“Father, I think Sindri was lying!”

Footstep were coming down behind him in a charge. Curiosity wouldn’t let him leave, but flight was making his feet flitter and shake, ready to take off from the raging bull behind him.

“Did I just not tell you to follow?! The dwarf is of no concern-“ Fighting curiosity won over.

“DAD! Just. Look.”

Turning back and presenting the tunic to the man who’d finally reached him, the golden hue burned brightly with hatful embers down at the find. Just as quickly the gaze focused back on the child. He neither cared nor understood.

“It’s a tunic, made from the skin of a rat. Sindri said the rats here were under the protection of Freya, but if that were true, this one wouldn’t be dead and Odin’s ravens wouldn’t dare go after it. Sindri’s hiding something.”

[argylemnwrites]

Fight or Flight - Chapter 11: Weighing

Pairing: Drake Walker x MC (Riley Liu)

Book: The Royal Heir (canon divergent from the end of book 2)

Word Count: ~3300

Rating: PG-13 (language only)

Summary: Six days since The Walker Absconding

Author’s Note: This series follows the Walkers, their friends, and Cordonia as a whole after they flee the country with their daughter during Barthelemy Beaumont’s attempted coup. To catch up on this series, check out it’s masterlist. (link can be found via my bio - sorry, Tumblr is once again not putting my posts with links in tag searches)

Rashad sighed heavily as he sat in a chair that was much too big behind a desk that was much too formal in an office that was much too stuffy. He’d agreed to be king-regent because he knew Liam was backed into a corner, and that his previous turns as legal counsel to both the palace and the Beaumonts made him the only obviously neutral party in the nobility. But not even one week in, and he found himself wishing he’d refused the appointment. He missed his job, his duties, his office, and that didn’t even touch on the mess he’d been handed.

It’s not like he wasn’t used to complicated and stressful work. But at Sloan Enterprises, it was work he was passionate about, work that he found stimulating and enthralling. Now, he was engulfed in so many decisions ranging from the banal to the insane. It was work he honestly wanted no part of, but that hadn’t exactly been an option.

His goal had simply been to get through the social season and reach the Conclave without rocking the boat, so to speak. Keep Cordonia on a steady course until someone who wanted the title of monarch could assume it, then return to his life as quickly as possible. But that had rapidly proved to be an impossibility. He’d already had to initiate a treason and kidnapping investigation, strip a duke and duchess of their titles, and postpone the social season. He’d done more in a few days than he’d hoped to do during his entire “reign.”

Now, he was facing numerous protests across the country that he had no idea how to handle. He wasn’t some verbose, eloquent speaker. Any speech from him was unlikely to quell citizen unrest. But in the past 36 hours, he’d watched news coverage of five different protests from five different groups. There was the group that called themselves the True Cordonians, a collection of traditionalists who had always opposed Drake and Riley and their connections to the United States, who were upset that the “traitorous” Walkers hadn’t been found yet. Counter-protesters to them had popped up in front of the Valtoria estate, denouncing the kidnapping and treason charges. That group hadn’t named themselves, but “She’s their kid” had become their rallying cry. Then there were the protests in Lythikos that called for Olivia’s installation as the “rightful regent” as well as a pro-Beaumont group that had come out in support of Barthelemy in Ramsford following his exclusive interview with Ana de Luca. And of course, the Liberation Core was using all the turmoil to spread their anti-monarchy message. Even if Rashad had been confident in his abilities to give a national address, he was completely unsure how to find a message that would even partially unify all those opposing groups.

All he wanted to do was to leave as little of a mark as possible as a ruler and to hand off the crown with Cordonia in a stable position. But it was rapidly seeming like those goals were mutually exclusive. And as loathe as he was to make big decisions, hiding away in the palace and letting the country fall to pieces was not something he could do. He needed to steady the ship, so to speak. And that’s why he was meeting with Lady Hana today.

Almost on cue, he heard a sharp tap on the main office door. After a second, Stefan entered, bowing his head slightly. Liam had offered to let his personal assistant stay on and help him with day to day tasks and the basics and essentials of the role. Rashad wasn’t naive enough to think that Stafan wasn’t essentially spying on him and reporting back to Liam, but he’d needed all the help he could get, and Stefan had proved invaluable, preparing daily briefings and news summaries, so he’d kept the man on his staff.

“Your Regency, Lady Hana is here for her appointment.”

“Thank you, Stefan. Send her in, please.”

A few moments later, Lady Hana entered, bowing her head slightly.

“Good afternoon, Your Regency.”

“Same to you, Lady Hana. Please, have a seat.” He gestured to the chairs in front of the desk. He was well aware this was probably awkward for her as well. She had probably been in this same office not that long ago with Liam behind the desk. 

“Thank you,” she said with a little nod, smoothing her skirt before she sat down.

“So, I figure we better get right down to business.”

“I’ve told Bastien and the investigators everything I know, but I can-”

“No! Not that; I know you’ve already given your statement. I wanted to talk to you about Valtoria.”

Hana was still and silent for just a moment before nodding crisply. “Very well. I would appreciate if I could have a day or two to move my belongings out of the estate.”

Rashad grimaced. This was so uncomfortable. “No, you misunderstand me, Lady Hana. I wanted to discuss whether you were open to accepting the title of Duchess of Valtoria.”

Her eyes widened at that. “Me? As a duchess?”

“Yes. You’ve been living there for about a year and a half at this point, and I am guessing you have served as an advisor to Lady Ri- er, the previous duchess at various points.”

“Well, yes. But it was really nothing.”

“I seriously doubt that.”

She gave him a little smile at that. “Why are you looking to appoint me?”

Rashad figured he had better level with her. She wasn’t going to respond well to flattery she found insincere. “There is too much instability across the kingdom at the moment. Too much is unfolding, and the citizens are rightly unsettled. You are a known presence at that duchy, and you are more than qualified to hold the title. You stepping into that role would help reduce the sense that everything is changing. I might not be able to keep Lythikos and Ramsford calm and peaceful, but if I can give Valtoria some sense of stability, that would be a start at least.”

“I don’t know. This seems like a gigantic call for you to make while you’re…”

“A placeholder?”

“I didn’t know how to phrase it politely,” she said with a little smile.

“That’s quite alright. To answer your question, I’m not sure if this is the right call, but it seems like a natural place to start. You know the people of Valtoria. You’ve lived there and you’ve served them and the country as a whole well. You have the skills and talents required for the position, and professional recruitment is one area I actually do have some experience, so I am confident you would do well in that role. But the choice is yours, of course.”

He watched her swallow, trying to read her expression, but her face wasn’t giving much away. He had no idea what she was thinking, but after a few seconds of tense silence, she nodded. “Alright then. If it’s what the citizens of Valtoria need, I’d be honored to accept. 

With that, she stretched her left hand across the desk, so Rashad grasped it firmly. As he pulled out some of the paperwork he’d prepared in hopes that she agreed and started going over some of the logistics, he hoped that his first major decision as regent would be one of his only major decisions. The fear of public scrutiny already loomed large in his mind, and this was a decision he was actually fairly confident in. Sadly, he was a realist, and he knew things were likely to get worse before they got better. All he could do, though, was keep trotting along, trying to get the country through the next couple of months relatively unscathed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Riley let out a groan, dropping her head into her hands. “Drake, this fucking sucks.”

“Yeah, it does.”

She glanced out the window, almost feeling like she would see a drone with a little camera courtesy of Amalas just peering into their room. Was she using drones? Did she have spies tailing them? Was she just scanning publicly accessible photos tagged in Greek cities with facial ID software? Did it even matter? The end result was the same. Someone she wasn’t sure she could trust knew where her family was, and that was mad nerve-wracking.

Riley glanced back down at Drake, who was sitting on the floor with Bridget, keeping her from using the dresser to pull up to standing. She’d discovered how to do so this morning, and she kept wanting to repeat it, but the last thing they needed was for her to pull the dresser down on top of herself. It made Riley think about all the furniture around their private quarters that Drake had bolted to the wall in preparation for this milestone. None of that would matter anymore.

For the moment, Bridget was distracted with a pile of blocks she was putting into a pillowcase over and over. Riley knew she would return to trying to escape Drake’s reach to try out her new skill soon enough, but for now, at least, she was safely and happily playing. 

Riley and Drake had been discussing what to do next for hours and hours at this point. They had called Olivia earlier, and after some back and forth, Drake and Olivia had both seemed confident that Amalas wasn’t actively following them and didn’t know their location beyond the city. After all, she had been eager to contact Olivia with her intel, and it seemed like too much of a coincidence for that call to come just a few hours after they had spent any real time out in public since their fleeing was common knowledge.

The best guess Drake had was that they had been in the background of someone’s Pictagram post or some shit like that, and that Amalas was just constantly running some sort of facial recognition program constantly on posts tagged with various cities in Greece. After all, she had to know they were trapped in Greece at this point. If they attempted to cross the borders, they would have to show their ID cards and they would likely be arrested on the spot.

Even if Amalas was just aware of their general location, it still was concerning that she was devoting that much effort to keeping tabs on them. But what actions they needed to take next were unclear to both of them. Hence them talking around in circles for hours and hours, just waiting for some idea that felt better than all the crappy ones they’d both thrown out there. 

“I just don’t like sitting around with her knowing where we are, Drake. Even if she doesn’t know the exact details.”

Drake glanced up at her and gave a little shrug. This wasn’t the first time she’d expressed that sentiment. “I don’t like it either. But there’s no guarantee things will be better if we move on to a new city.”

“Olivia said that she’s trying to use us as leverage. How does that sit right with you?”

He shot her a clearly annoyed glare before looking back at Bridget, emptying the pillowcase for her to start filling with blocks again before he said, “It doesn’t fucking sit right with me. But we need to think long term here. We will need to find places to stay for at least a couple of months. That’s the earliest the Conclave can happen, and the charges won’t be dropped before then. We’re also going to need food and warmer clothing when it’s not the middle of summer, and that beater of a car is not going to hold up forever. We need to be frugal and cautious now.”

Riley knew he was right. Her instinct was always to scramble and react, often impulsively. If they kept following her lead every step of the way, they were probably going to make things harder than they needed to be. And she did appreciate that Drake was trying to put more thought into concrete plans. Both of them drifting along without a clear plan, complacent beyond belief was how Bridget was named heir and they found themselves in this situation in the first place.

“Are we even going to have enough money to get us through the next couple of months?”

Drake let out a sigh and shook his head.

“How long?” Riley asked, scrunching her eyes closed as she braced for the answer.

“Three weeks, more or less, if we keep our expenses like they have been.” She opened her eyes and locked them on his. His shoulders sagged and his eyes were sad and heavy, like he was somehow letting her down by telling her the honest facts.

“Drake… How are we going…” she trailed off, unable to finish her thought.

“I’m gonna need to pick up some odd jobs or something, find a way to make some money.”

“How are we going to do that without any ID we can show or anything. I mean, Amalas is out as a source of forgeries at this point, so unless-”

“Olivia told us she was going to poke around, see what she could do. Hana has our passports, so that’s a start at least.”

“I don’t know. I just… I hate this. Everything we have to do feels like it’s gonna get us caught.”

Drake ran his hand over the stubble on his jaw. He hadn’t shaved this morning, and in all the time she had known him, Riley could count the number of times he hadn’t shaved on one hand. She wondered if he was trying to grow a beard to make himself less recognizable or if he had just been too stressed and sleep deprived to bother today. She knew he wasn’t sleeping well.

“I don’t know how to fix this perfectly, Riley. I just don’t.” He looked so dejected, placing his chin on his bent knee, so Riley slid off the end of the bed and joined him and Bridget on the floor, threading her legs under his raised leg in hopes of conveying some degree of comfort.

“Well, we’re just going to have to make a decision and not look back here. And it looks like the two least bad options are to either stay hiding out here for as long as possible and hope that Amalas doesn’t go blabbing, or move on to a new city and hope she doesn’t find us there and that it isn’t too much of an expense to do so.”

He nodded, reaching for her hand. She grabbed on tightly, threading their fingers together. Maybe it was for the best they were both mad conflicted here. It allowed them to really decide on their next move as a team.

“I know I’ve been kind of reluctant to head to a new city, but one thing that is worth considering is that if we went to a bigger city, I might be able to find some under the table work. Day labor, that sort of thing. Plus…” he trailed off and shook his head a little at that, so Riley pushed on.

“What?”

“Well, we have a better chance of finding someone to do a forgery for us in a bigger city, too.”

“You think we should just find a random stranger to forge us passports with new identities?”

“We might have to. I hope Olivia can come through for us, but I’m not counting on that. She’s not going to risk her reputation and good standing to really put her neck out there for us. It’s one thing to keep our location a secret, it’s another to draw attention to herself by asking a lot of questions about how to fake a convincing Greek passport. So if she isn’t able to help us, we’re probably going to have to find someone to do it for us at some point.”

“I thought you said the bigger cities would be the first place they would try to track us.”

“Yeah, but it’s been a few days. They are probably broadening their search at this point. I feel like that risk isn’t as bad as it used to be.”

“So are you saying you think we should head out?”

He paused for a moment and swallowed roughly, running his free hand through his hair. “I don’t know. I think we could stay here for a little while longer and wait to see what Olivia can do for us about fabricated identification, or we could cut our losses and start trying to plan for that on our own. I don’t exactly like either option, Walker, but I think those two I could live with. Where are you at?”

She bit her lip, trying to figure out what was best. She wished there was a clear sign that one option was better than another, but there just wasn’t. They were going to be gambling here no matter what, and while she normally loved a good game of poker, the fact that the stakes here included the safety of her daughter and her family left her feeling sick to her stomach.

“I guess I don’t trust Amalas knowing even our general location.”

“Even though…,” Drake started, taking a deep breath and giving her hand a squeeze before he continued, “even though you thought she might be a good resource for us yesterday?”

Riley opened her mouth to snap back at him, frustrated that he seemed to be trying to trap her or accuse her or something, but she stopped when she saw the look in his eyes. He was afraid of her. She’d never seen that look directed at her before, not quite like that. Sure, she’d seen him upset and terrified, but she had never been the source of it before. So she swallowed down her instinct to lash out and defend herself and let out a little sigh. She’d put him through enough with this whole fugitive status already, and she didn’t want him to feel like he couldn’t be honest with her, couldn’t challenge her. They had always pushed each other, even before they were together. She couldn’t risk losing that now.

“The situation has changed,” she said, trying to keep any defensiveness out of her voice. “If she’s putting the effort into keeping tabs on our whereabouts, she has something up her sleeve, and I don’t trust her. It was one thing when I hoped we might be able to leverage some juicy info and future political favors, but now… I just don’t think we’re going to be willing to pay the price she wants.”

Drake nodded a couple of times before he said, “Okay, so we’re moving on then?”

“If you’re okay with that.”

“As long as we go to a bigger city, I’m okay with it.”

She gave him a little smile and reached up to cup his cheek with her free hand. “Got a place in mind?”

“If we’re gonna do this, we might as well commit. I say Athens, unless you-”

But she cut him off, shaking her head before leaning over to kiss his cheek. “Thank you, Drake.”

“You don’t need to thank me. I’m-” he started, but threw himself to the side and grabbed Bridget who was crawling over to the dresser, tugging her into his lap. “Oh no you don’t, Peanut.”

Riley felt her lips widening into a genuine smile, a feeling that almost felt foreign after the past several days. But her family was here, and they were all just doing the best they could. Even if it all fell apart, at least she could take comfort in that fact. So for now, she just took in her husband and her daughter sharing a normal moment, happy simply to be together.

Permatag:  @walkerswhiskeygirl​   @riley--walker​  @bebepac​ @ravenpuff02​ @oofchoices​ @octobereighth​ @drakewalker04​ @kimmiedoo5​  @mfackenthal​  @thequeenofcronuts​  

The Royal Romance/The Royal Heir: @iaminlovewithtrr​ @ao719​ @mskaneko​ @katedrakeohd​ @jovialyouthmusic​ @marshmallowsandfire​ @axwalker​ @kingliam2019​ @sirbeepsalot​ @texaskitten30​ @princessleac1​ @ladyangel70​ @dcbbw​ @yaushie​

Drake x MC: @no-one-u-know​ @drakeandcamilleofvaltoria​  @iplaydrake​ @gibbles82​ @drakewalkerisreal​ @notoriouscs​  @drakesensworld​ @drake-colt-lover-99​

Fight or Flight: @masterofbluff​ @burnsoslow​ @bobasheebaby​ @shz256​​

[coppicefics]

Masked Omens: Week Seven, Part One

[Image Description: Image 1 - A simple rendition of the Masked Singer UK logo, a golden mask with colourful fragments flying off of it. The mask has a golden halo and a golden devil tail protruding from either side. Below, gold text reads ‘Masked Omens’.

Image 2 - A page from the Entertainment section of the Capital Herald, dated 6th February 2021. Full image description and transcript below the cut. End ID.]

Read the fic here! All news stories and events are entirely fictional; real names of people (with the exception of image attributions) and places are used only for context. No affiliation is implied, and no disrespect is intended by the use of their names in this work of fiction.

[EDIT: With thanks to HolRose/@hasturswig for spotting that I had overlooked the sad passing of John Noakes, who originally appeared on this page!]

The Capital Herald - Saturday, 6th February 2021 Entertainment, page 15

Top left: Grasswater redo rumoured Will anybody tackle the ‘cursed’ adaptation? [Image Description: The ‘w’ in ‘Grasswater, ‘h’ in ‘the’, and ‘o’ in ‘adaptation’ in the above headline have been circled in pencil. End ID.] It's been nearly a decade and a half since the critically-acclaimed adaptation of Sir Thomas Parsett's The Grasswater Affair flopped into cinemas, and rumours are once again circulating about a possible reboot. The first attempt at transferring Parsett's magnum opus to the big screen was released in 2009 after a series of setbacks to the production process. Among the calamities that befell the set were a fire in the wardrobe department, an overdose requiring producers to recast the lead role of Fabian, and a bout of food poisoning that halted filming for over a week. There were whispers, among the more superstitious, that the film was cursed. By the time The Grasswater Affair was finally released, the delay had whipped the original book's fans into a frenzy of anticipation, and excitement over the forthcoming film actually pushed the 19th-century novel into the bestseller lists for the first time in the weeks before the release. Early reviews were promising, and the good press only fed the hype machine. But the crowds that packed into cinemas to watch it emerged disappointed; while the reasons they gave for their disappointment varied wildly, everybody from casual viewers to die-hard book lovers seemed to find it lacking in some aspect or another. It deviated too far from the source text, while adhering precisely to the minor details that didn't matter; it featured a young actor fresh out of drama school, rather than the promised household name; it lingered too long on shots of the actresses' bosoms, and the key object that proved key to the plot was left entirely out of focus in the background of a crucial early scene. While, naturally, some audience members enjoyed it in its own right, it never became either a blockbuster hit or a cult classic, and it still boasts a lowly 2.9 stars on the Internet Movie Database (IMDb) and 24% approval rating on Rotten Tomatoes. This being the case, it might be hard to understand why rumours continue to circulate about a revival of The Grasswater Affair, or what might make this time different from the many, many other occasions when such a story has surfaced on the internet. The first question is easily answered by a look at the thriving community of Parsett fans who adore the original novel – and, indeed, the rest of the series The Grasswater Affair is part of. Following first Fabian, and then various other heroes, through a sort of alternative 19th century underpinned by magic and other fantasy tropes, it's been hailed as a masterpiece – and it's aged surprisingly well despite the shift in society's views and tolerances since its publication. The first novel sees Fabian locked in a battle of wits with his somewhat older rival, Rafferty, as they seek to make their fortunes in a society rife with danger and – worse – scandal. As for the second question, the recent rumours have an extra ring of truth to them thanks to the attachment of an actual name – writer-turned-showrunner Noel Garmin is said to be in talks about the project. Having adapted several of his own books for the small screen, could he now be turning his famed respect for written source material to a film or series based on Parsett's masterpiece? If he does, book fans can expect to be very pleased with the result. Garmin was asked about his upcoming projects at a recent convention panel, and his answer, while enigmatic, seemed promising.“Well, I've got to write some books, at some point! But I do also want to work on some more TV, it's a fascinating way of telling a story and it's still quite new and exciting for me. Perhaps I could tell one of my favourite stories, one that I didn't originally write. I'm actually talking to some people... We'll have to see. Hopefully I'll have news for you soon.” Hopefully you will, Noel. Hopefully you will. CITRON DEUX-CHEVAL Top right: Summer’s operatic offerings Last of Glyndebourne festival announcements [Image Description: The apostrophe and ‘s’ of ‘summer’s’ and the ‘t’ of ‘operatic’ in the above headline are circled in pencil. Below the headline is a short, wide picture of a theatre auditorium with red curtains. Small text over the bottom of the picture reads ‘Photo: Gabriel Varaljay | Unsplash’. End ID.] Opera fans are in for a treat this summer, as Puccini's Turandot returns to Glyndebourne Opera House. The venue in Lewes is renowned as the home of great opera, and Turandot is a favourite no matter where it's performed, so this combination of the two is a perfect match. Throw in popular young tenor Jeremy Wensleydale – most recently seen on ITV's The Masked Singer - performing the role of Calaf, and it's a performance guaranteed to impress. The play follows Calaf as he sets out to win the hand of the titular princess. Each suitor is asked three riddles, and failure means instant death. But answering three riddles is not enough to win the heart of Princess Turandot, and Calaf strikes a desperate bargain; if she can guess his true name by daybreak, she may put him to death regardless. If she fails, the marriage goes ahead. It's an interesting method of courting, to be sure, but the opera has enchanted and delighted audiences for many years now. And, if nothing else, who can resist an opportunity to hear 'Nessun Dorma' live? Glyndebourne members can book tickets now for dates between 25th May and 22nd June; remaining tickets will be available from the 18th of April. Turandot is the latest title to be announced by the opera house and completes their summer season's line-up. There will also be performances of Cosi Fan Tutte, Tristan and Isolde, Il Turco in Italia, and an array of concerts and other events. The Glyndebourne Summer Festival is always a highlight of the arts scene in the middle of the year, but there are events all year round. Currently, the opera house is a stopping-point for a touring production of Romeo & Juliet, which has already passed through the Chichester Festival Theatre and will then go on to Colchester, Ipswich, Cambridge, Sheffield, Manchester and Leeds. The show is a daring new interpretation of the age-old Shakespearean tragedy, fusing music and dance with the familiar story, and a full review will appear in the Capital Herald on Thursday. From the middle of February, Romeo & Juliet will be replaced at Glyndebourne with a more traditional #approach to La Traviata by Giuseppe Verdi. The music of La Traviata may be familiar, even to audiences unfamiliar with the story, as it was rather liberally plundered for inspiration by Donato Lovreglio in 1865. Of course, that does assume a familiarity with Lovreglio - but if you find yourself humming along during your first attendance, that might very well be why. Incidentally, for more opera and classical music trivia, you might find my recent book, Inside Opera, worth a read - especially if you need to brush up on your cultured conversation points before you visit the opera house this summer. EDWARD BIGGS Inside Opera, by Edward Biggs, is published by Byker Press and is available now in all good bookshops. #Hardback RRP ￡9.99/€11.99.

Centre left: Capital Herald scoops NMA Star-studded ceremony honours news greats [Image Description: The ‘H’ of ‘Herald’, ‘A’ of ‘NMA’, and ‘t’ of ‘star’ in the above headline are circled in pencil.] The 2021 News Media Award ceremony took place on Thursday evening at a glamorous event held in the Mayfair Room at the Connaught Hotel, Mayfair. While many of the attendees are more used to operating the cameras than parading in front of them, they rose to the occasion with great aplomb, rubbing shoulders on the red carpet with some of the most famous entertainers in the UK who'd come to add their own special touches to the ceremony. It will come as no surprise to learn that Trevor McDonald, Natasha Kaplinsky, and Naga Munchetty were in attendance, as were Tom Bradby and Dan Walker. But the attendee who really got heads turning was Carmine Zugiber, notorious for attending very few events on UK soil. Although she's normally out in the field, she's been based in London for the last couple of months, covering the political beat for News World Weekly in Uriel Scrolle's absence, and it seems she couldn't resist the opportunity to collect her awards for Best Combat Coverage and Outstanding Field Reporting in person. Wearing a glamorous Ligur gown in striking red to match her hair, she paused on the red carpet to exchange words with some of those less fortunate reporters covering the event. “I don't know what to do with myself, with nobody shooting at me!” Zugiber joked. “Where's my bulletproof jacket?” The ceremony featured a performance of 'Messy (If I Want To Be)' by rapper P-White, who also presented an award for Entertainment Columnist of the Year to the Capital Herald's very own Citron Deux-Cheval. Another of the Capital Herald's staff writers, Edward Biggs, was nominated in the category of News-Adjacent Achievement for his 2020 trivia book, That Guy From That Thing. While the award, presented by Dame Angela Crowley, eventually went to News World Weekly's Donald Eath for High Score: A Study in Arcade Machines, Edward did get a chance to meet Dame Angela and exchange a few words. “She said I shouldn't feel discouraged, as she didn't win anything at her first awards ceremony either – and she wished me every success with my new book, which has just come out,” said Biggs of the star. “Hopefully, next year, I'll be bringing home a trophy too.” At the end of the night, as the winners and losers drifted home, the presses were already roaring into action to print the morning's papers. The news never stops; there was precious little time for the winners to enjoy the warm glow of appreciation, and no time at all for the less successful nominees to lament their losses. But at the end of the day, the whole industry could sleep safe in the knowledge that the work we do is valuable, and valued. MARY HODGES

Bottom left: Blue Peter garden party ‘22 Celebrating 10 years in show’s new location [Image description: The ‘B’ and ‘e’ of ‘Blue’ and the ‘h’ of ‘show’ in the above headline are circled in pencil. End ID.] The BBC has announced that it will be holding a party for former Blue Peter presenters, guests, and viewers in 2022. Held in the Blue Peter garden in Salford to celebrate ten years since it was relocated from London, the party is expected to provide an opportunity for Blue Peter presenters, past and present, to mingle and let their hair down, as well as catching up with some of the guests who've appeared on the show over the years. Former presenters such as Adam Young, Katy Hill, Radzi Chinyanganya, Anthea Turner, Gethin Jones, Pat Maputi, Yvette Fielding and Konnie Huq can expect an invite, of course, as can the current team of Lindsey Russell, Richie Driss, Mwaka Mudenda, and Adam Beales. But the former guests are an even more varied bunch; everyone from Idina Menzel and Sir Chris Hoy to McFly and Tim Peake could be invited, to say nothing of the hundreds of farmers, bakers, teachers, parents, and kids who've taken part in the show. While the party is quite a long way off yet, the BBC are already hard at work figuring out a lottery system that will allow them to give every viewer an equal chance to be invited to the party. Register your interest now on the Blue Peter website to make sure you don't miss out. SARAH JEUNE Ad, bottom right: [Image Description: A black background with a dark-grey crown resting on it. There are smudges of a lighter colour on the background. Above the crown, graffiti-style text reads ‘P-White’. Below it, written as if in chalk, are the words ‘Chalkdust tour’, underlined as if in chalk. Beneath it, a red bar reading ‘New dates added’ covers the words ‘Sold out’. Below that is the web address ‘www.chalkdust-tour.com’. Tiny writing in the bottom right hand corner reads ‘Photo: Zach Angelo for ProChurchMedia | Unsplash’. End ID.]

[End of transcript]

[lizzybeth1986]

Quick Thoughts on The White People Waambulance, Chapters 18 and 19

• Sorry this QT is coming out so late, guys. I regret to say my heart wasn't really in this one...and it hasn't been with regards to my QTs for a while. This one might be my last, unless we count me finishing them off for the (not rewritten) Book 1. It's been two years since I began, and the last two books made the process honestly really exhausting.

• I clubbed the two finale chapters together because I really couldn't be bothered to do separate ones for both.

• In fact...I won't be doing any of what I have been doing for my QTs so far. I'll be honest to you: I usually do multiple replays, the last few in tandem with the other routes on YouTube. I go through the scenes one by one. I keep note of differences and variations and carefully choose screenshots that will reflect the gist of the scenes.

But I couldn't be bothered to do any of that this time. I pressed the "continue" and then the "end book" buttons as soon as I finished my first run of those chapters. I'm drained, guys. And I don't think I'll be coming back to the TRH series at least, not even for Liam or Hana or Kiara. Maybe my mind will change by the time the second book comes out (update from present-day Lizzy: no it didn't) but I'm not counting on it. And you'll probably know why by the time this QT ends.

• TW: Discussions on racism, both fandom racism and from within the narrative. The last section of this QT is going to be...pretty heavy, guys.

There's also going to be a lot of anti-Drake, anti-Olivia, anti-Madeleine and anti-Penelope content here, so if you like any of those characters...well, you've been warned.

The ensuing post is going to be LONG, and I know a lot of you have good reasons not to deal with long posts, so here's a tldr:

1. The TRR writing team stick to their weird obsession for jobless whiny white men.

2. Read this book once and you'll feel like you're drowning in an ocean of white tears.

3. WOC continue to get scraps from the writing team, even as they boast of being diverse and inclusive. In fact, they're regularly treated as mere tokens, exotic eye-candy or non-entities, while their behaviour is measured on standards that are very different from their white counterparts (this happens in other books as well).

...okay I wasn't expecting for the tldr to be long too 😅

• Me @ my QTs then:

Me @ my QTs now:

• I'll probably be finishing off my TRR Book 1 QT series when I'm a little less burnt out, but for now this is where it ends, I guess.

• So...here is to summarize the last two chapters: Accident happens. LIs mad. Paparazzi sad (but largely get away scot-free). MC and baby safe. At the Council meeting Kiara slam dunks the murderer of Liam's mother with the style and elegance this fandom still refuses to acknowledge her for. The MC is nice to her for like half a second. Last Apple Ball. New clothes for everyone as if they had a Diwali bumper sale the week before or something. Godfrey is somehow responsible for the security (who thought this was a good idea) and seeing the Auvernese Royal Guard outside our doors is SO not-creepy.

We get to see if we impressed our Auvernese and Monterriso allies enough. Bradshaw compliments Kiara for like half a second. Olivia sees the dude from the Q&A session (Jin) at the Ball and (if you pay) you get to see her catch, interrogate and lowkey flirt with him.

Leona and Bianca make it to the ball (where is Bartie Sr. Where are Xinghai and Lorelei. Where is Regina) and this time the narrative makes sure to shoehorn a plot element into their presence here: Leona is there so we can do something about the reveal that she constantly ratted us out to the press for money. ("oh look! Walker Ranch was plot related after all! We have a reason (albeit a flimsy, paper-thin one) to set 9 whole chapters in Texas. Even though we had to literally come up with this bit in the last minute, because really - all we wanted to do as a writing team was nut collectively over Drake Walker")

(I also can't believe that between the time I wrote this line and the time this QT finally came out - they literally found a way to re-fucking-write Book 1 so they could nut collectively over Drake Walker earlier)

• Why were we required to dress down in Texas for these assholes when they couldn't even bother to dig up their Sunday best for this ball??? Oh right, they're Walkers. Hypocrisy runs in the family.

• Good thing is you can choose to banish Leona if you want. She's angry about it for a second then accepts it and leaves. But like what is the point of banishing her when she hardly even bothers to come there in the first place? She's not going to be bawling her eyeballs out saying "boohoo, they threw me out of this country that I spent like five minutes in and never even wanted to visit in the first place".

• Bianca is present at the end of Chapter 18 mainly to deliver to us a plot point at the very last minute: a clue about where we could find proof about Queen Eleanor's murder. Bianca mentions conversations Jackson had with her, and a secret room somewhere. Her leaving the palace and abandoning her children is addressed, and the MC gets to berate her. It's...short.

• Why this important piece of information was given to Bianca when idk LEO could have pitched in and spoken about it, no one knows. Oh wait. I keep forgetting. Bianca is Drake's mother. That's why.

• Okay so Amalas valiantly found out about Leona's involvement in this and gave us tangible proof via photographs. But we're kiiiinda forgetting that the scrutiny and privacy invasions were happening even before we hauled ass to Walker Ranch? Who was responsible for those? Who was the "source" that the Chapter 17 paparazzo was referring to, the one that mentioned they would triple the price for more photos of the Queen/Mother of the Heir (Coz like why would she do that. She's already broke)? How did Amalas come by this information so easily and why was she really that invested? Why is no one asking these questions? Why isn't the group asking these questions? Why are they stupid. Jesus, they're all so stupid. HOW ARE YOU SO STUPID, SQUAD.

• Shortly after they get rid of Leona and Bianca, the rest of the group give the happy couple a choice of toys for the nursery - and that's our final nursery purchase. You can either go for the corgi - which is on brand for the series by now I think - or the lion, which is seen as very Cordonian.

• More party shenanigans. We're nice to Kiara for another half-second. Kiara arranges a photoshoot for us. The team can't pretend to give a fuck anymore about its fans so they will ask us to pay for an edit that I've seen millions of edit-creators in the fandom do wayyyy better. Like let's be honest - compare the engagement shoot pics (messy as they were) to the shoots we eventually got this book. You can see the difference. You can tell which one required more work.

• Anyway, if you choose this scene you wind up going back to the ballroom, dance with your spouse, aaaaand it's time for another diamond option. This time your spouse gives you something you've been craving (mousse parfait for the Liam MC, chocolate chip cookies for the Hana MC, handmade chocolates for the Maxwell MC and a choice between bacon and a veg version of it for the Drake MC. Damn, team TRR. Your favouritism is showing). The couple also writes a letter to the baby that the child can read growing up, in a bit of a parallel to Eleanor's letter to Liam that we see at the end of the chapter.

• After this, Liam reveals he has been pondering over what Bianca said, and wants to find out where they could find that secret room. Cue Liam's own flashback scene for free. Godfrey bringing to Queen the same goblet that the RoE MC found in a flea market in Book 2 for Regina (or perhaps just a similarish one). Liam and Eleanor reciting a rhyme that turns out to have clues for the secret room.

• To give the team credit, they seem to have (finally) put some thought into this. Like this actually feels like Liam's scene. Not one that delivers information about his family but is really about another character. They seem to incorporate all the things Eleanor seemed to be known for - things that were hardly addressed in the books when it came to talk of her. She is shown with a love for books given that books and poetry form an important part of the clues she leaves for Liam. One of the books is about foraging, which is unsurprising considering her love for gardens that was established in Book 1 of TRR.

• So...like...nice job but why was practically everything about Eleanor (including the way she'd stand up to Constantine, her displeasure at the sound of Godfrey and Bartie's names, her nature that Liam not only inherited but also learned) left only for your finale? Why no buildup? Why was I seeing you lot constantly pandering to Drake's family the entire time? Why do I know way, way more about Jackson than I do about Eleanor whose story this WAS? Why is she and her son suddenly getting this burst of attention at the tail end??

• They still manage to push young!Drake into a scene focusing on Liam and Eleanor, so we can see how Eleanor's teaching of how to be a responsible royal began to make inroads into Liam's way of thinking. It's the ultimate irony, that Liam took his mother's advice so much to heart that he lets Drake stay in his home, eat his food, and complain about those dastardly nobles to his heart's content for free.

Poor Eleanor in her grave is like

• Very fitting, how Constantine's proposal to Eleanor happens in the hedge maze, very much like Liam's first declaration of love in Book 1.

• If you're married to Liam, you get an extra letter that's addressed to Liam's future wife. She clearly knew her days were to be numbered by the time she gave birth to that second child at least.

• Lmao @ how the team somehow managed to remember that Eleanor would have been Leo's stepmother too. He's mentioned a couple of times. They didn't have enough time to develop a sprite for young!Leo but somehow had all the time and resources to make one for young!Savannah who had literally no purpose in Drake's flashback scene? Hmm. Hmm.

• They somehow manage to find the twin to the RoE MC's gifted goblet that Godfrey gave Eleanor the night she died, and Liam reveals that he's been obsessed with poisons enough to know that it wasn't the drink that was poisoned, it was the cup itself. Everyone is shook.

• Love that extra little detail about Liam's obsession with learning about poisons and how it's a sign of how deeply Eleanor's death affected him. But tell me honestly if you remember this plot point coming up even once before in any significant way. Even during the one time a person is poisoned in the previous book (by the laws of karma, the victim in this instance is Godfrey's only daughter) Liam shows very few signs of this "obsession". At a time when he has also lost a father. Convenient how something that could have added more depth to Liam is kept aside until there's a scene where his knowledge is required. Convenient indeed.

• I kind of understand why Liam acts on impulse, okay. The man just discovered who murdered his mum, at least some amount of irrationality is allowed (esp considering he hardly got to express ANYTHING when his goddamn father died). But you'd think Liam's friends would hold him back and help him think this through? Convince him that there are more effective ways to confront and get a confession out of Godfrey who after is in charge of security at the moment? You seriously think charging into the ballroom and suddenly stripping this man of his titles is going to actually work??? You couldn't figure out how to make him vulnerable instead so that he wouldn't be able to escape???

• I mean like, sure, one could always rationalize it all as "well see Lizzy, they needed a dramatic end to this story and they needed to wrap this mystery up quick". But there were other ways they could have spread it out than make it all sound so...so random. And you bet we all know why the narrative had to scramble around last minute to solve this. It's because we spend half the damn book in a dilapidated ranch with a shit family!

• Anyway, Godfrey escapes...and the MC tells her spouse that she's going into labour after...two contractions? Um. Okay.

• So. That ends Book 1 of this new series. And with it my QTs, for this series at least. My QTs for Book 1 (the OG, not the rewrite) might continue, but I'd need to repeat my failplay again because I lost most of those screenshots 😭

General Thoughts on the Book:

• So far, this is what I can see as happening in the next book:

- The birth, obviously

- Any extra perks from our purchases (ie. the nursery and the garden)

- Subplots involving the LIs' conflicts regarding parenthood and their own childhoods

- The mystery behind Eleanor's death isn't quite over yet, nor is the truth behind the constant paparazzi presence in TRH. Leona was the scapegoat this time around, but how did Amalas get all this information so quickly?

- Where is Eleanor's other child? Olivia's investigations may or may not lead to that answer. I'm pretty sure Jin might be involved as well.

- Another possibility is that Madeleine may give us important information since she was potentially aware that Eleanor was pregnant at the time.

- The mystery behind Jackson's death and what he knew regarding Eleanor's condition.

- What part did Bartie Sr have to play in all this? How involved was Constantine in the murder (if in fact he was)? What more dark secrets will we learn about Constantine, Godfrey and Bartie Sr during this time? What ultimately caused the breakdown in Constantine and Jackson's relationship, since Drake mentions Jackson being around when Regina was Queen as well?

- Speaking of Regina, how involved was she in any of this? We know she was Godfrey's cousin-in-law and Bartie Sr made a comment on her during the announcement about the heir, and that she married Constantine a couple years after Eleanor's death, but was she aware of any of this or was she largely out of the major plot and brought in later to cement Godfrey's position and power?

- I'd mention the possibility that Lorelai could know something, but they didn't really give anyone connected to Hana any time at all, so I have my doubts.

- Operation Swan, and possibly a visit to Monterisso. Liam's younger sibling must be in one of these places but my guess is on Monterisso.

- I'm guessing the team will write a nice wedding for Penelope and Ezekiel next book, while Kiara continues to get scraps from the same team.

- Drake and Olivia will continue to eat into the plot. Madeleine will join this unholy trinity as well because they've set the stage for her to have plenty of angst.

With that over, these were my thoughts once this book was finished:

WHERE ARE THE DUCHESSES?

Remember how, back in Book 3, we all marvelled at the number of women in this country who were in positions of power? Adeleide and Emmeline were powerful duchesses while their husbands were secondary figures, and Joelle though married into a noble family is an influential artist and - according to Liam - the embodiment of King Fabian's values. It seemed like, despite the underlying sexism and racism in the story, women were at least at the forefront of Cordonian politics.

This is virtually gone in TRH1. Godfrey (who wasn't even interested in Krona in the first place, much less Cordonia) and Landon (whose only concern seemed to be Penelope, leaving Emmeline to manage the duchy) have a seat in the Council. In fact we never even see either of these woman in the book. I can maybe understand the logic behind not appointing Adeleide, but the fact that Emmeline is passed over for her far-less -qualified husband is a mystery to me!

Also, has anyone noticed how white-male-centered the whole Eleanor story is? Notice how we never see Eleanor's friends, besides Jackson? We never see any of the courtly ladies of that era? She's the Queen. She'd have her own court. I find it impossible that Eleanor would have no interactions of importance among her own goddamned court, that Joelle, Emmeline or Adeleide wouldn't even be mentioned in her story thus far. It's fascinating that forget being part of her story - these women are largely forgotten in the book itself.

(Note: It's also important to add that none of Kiara's family - besides Zeke - makes an appearance this book. At all. One member of Penelope's family and one member of Madeleine's family is in the council, but we never really see or hear anything from Kiara's, even though Hakim was Constantine's old friend and Joelle could have easily been connected to Eleanor, given that Eleanor was exactly the kind of ruler Joelle would have loved and respected.

While we're on that subject, Lorelai could have been connected to Eleanor as well - considering that we know next to nothing about her years in Shanghai. There were ways Hana's story could have been tied into the overall plot as well that were largely ignored. The fact that both the main and secondary WOCs presented opportunities for better plot and story, and despite that they were largely ignored in the books...I think that says a lot. But I will get into more of that in detail in a different section).

LI SPACE AND STORY

• Now...as we all know, The TRR/TRH series is primarily a romance-focused book first, with an underlying plot about royalty and politics. So it makes sense to evaluate the book based on what it gives its love interests. That includes the number of scenes they get, and the kind of focus their story is given. So...here's the rundown of how that goes in TRH Book 1:

Liam: Overall, not too bad. He gets one individual scene, a free and paywalled childhood scene (though the free one is essential for the group's realization of who killed Eleanor). The letter his mother writes to Liam includes an extra section towards the end, meant for the MC who marries him. However, we must note that a lot of this "attention" was thrust into the very final chapter of this book, and 99% of the same book didn't exactly make an attempt to explore his inner thoughts on anything - his mother's death, the dealings with the foreign countries, his political activities. Eleanor being pregnant came from a scene that made Olivia the center of attention, the MC had the opportunity to ask him how he was feeling only once or twice, and most of the time the narrative relegated it all to "the matter is still being investigated". It's a slight improvement from the absolute lack of concern the MC and the narrative showed about Liam's emotional state post his father's death in Book 3, but not much.

Variations wise, the team did step up on the basic ones for most of the LIs, so clearly we've moved past the days of seeing cut-paste scenes and the likes of Liam and Hana saying "I'm so dumb in love with you". However, in playthroughs where the MC is Liam's wife and Queen of Cordonia, her lack of genuine concern for her country and lack of curiosity about the place she's ruling, sticks out like a sore thumb. The fandom loves to highlight how the plot is "written for Liam" or is "easier in Liam's playthrough", but besides his own child being the heir, nothing else from Book 3 onwards seems like it was particularly written with him in mind.

Drake: Hoo boy. So 2019 was clearly the year that many people didn't believe me about Drake eating up space, and the year they had to eat their words because in TRH it was too obvious to be ignored. On an overall scale you cannot avoid the extra perks even his LI scenes got - his Valtoria scene in Chapter 4 was longer, set in a different place and he was allowed to expand on his decision to say yes to Liam's request in a way Hana and Maxwell never were. We learned way more about his familial relationships and dynamics than all the LIs combined. His childhood scene was the first to be given variants depending on whether the MC was his wife or not. His sister's wedding takes up almost half the book, leaving little to no space for either the intrigue, or even the pregnancy that was supposed to be THE most important part of the book.

An insane amount of retconning was done to emphasize strongly on the "marshmallow" part of his personality, having him state time and again that for the MC he can even "sport a tutu if you said you had a thing for the Sugar Fairy". Part of these changes could be attributed to the backlash the team got for having him call a pink cake "girly".

There is a strong possibility that Jackson might be explored further in the second book, and it's no surprise considering that he's the one parent that is most talked about in the series. The book looks like it was truly written with Drake in mind, with a heavy dose of Olivia, and everyone else was added as a bit of an afterthought.

Maxwell: Pretty awful treatment for a character that the head writer of the team claims to like. He has no individual character scenes, and one childhood scene where his older brother Bertrand is given more focus. Ironically, Maxwell was more wary of Bartie Sr in TRR Book 2 than Bertrand was, but somehow they changed this little detail so that Maxwell could be written out of his own story.

His LI scenes were also not given much effort - some were badly written, and some scenes (like the free ones) showed little to no variations between the friendly and romantic playthroughs. One that comes to mind is the baby announcement photoshoot, which was so poorly done it added nothing of value to the character or the relationship.

Like the last book, Maxwell isn't allowed much development in TRH1, and he's still forced into a largely "court jester" role in the story. This reflects very poorly on him in certain situations, such as the chapter where we finally get glimpses of his book. The aim was to be humourous and light about the events of the series, but he comes out of it sounding thoroughly insensitive towards his friends, none of whose consent he took to write this self-centered pile of garbage.

However, there is hope that they might do things a bit better for him next book, if the rewrite of him in TRR 2.0 was anything to go by. However, it would be awful if they tried to do a better job of him and then left out Hana. Speaking of which...

Hana: I'm going to begin this section with a comparison to another character, someone who should have been treated as a secondary character - Olivia.

Olivia in this book has 2 character scenes (they're very plot driven, but they also explore her outside of her friendship with the MC and dynamic with the group). The spy scene with Auvernese royalty, and the scene with Jin, the Auvernese spy. An entire chapter is spent in her duchy (by now we've seen Lythikos four times and I'm now sick of the place), and she winds up taking over Maxwell's Q&A scene as well.

So that's technically 2.5 scenes AND a childhood scene that revolves around her even though it's about Liam's mother. In addition to this, Olivia also gets her own mini-book, The Royal Holiday, that revolves (again) around her duchy and has the group clamouring to give her attention when no one else wants to.

Here are the stats for Hana, who by virtue of being an LI, is also a potential co-protagonist in the series:

Nothing.

Zilch. Zip. Zero. Nada. Nothing.

She has one childhood scene that is part of the group's scenes - a beautiful, heartbreaking one that serves as a slap in the face to anyone who'd dared to be dismissive of what she went through earlier - but none after that, and no individual scenes either. The team - in one of their most offensive choices this book - force a storyline where she has fertility issues just so the MC can be the one carrying the child, and the same MC can opt(!!) to ask about her well-being after two days. The same MC has the chance to whine about not getting pregnant soon enough in front of Hana.

There have been a few efforts made to make the MC appear more caring towards Hana: she can angrily defend Hana against Isabella's jibes, and she can make Hana relax for once during the baby shower (unlike the wedding reception where the same MC treated her like a bridesmaid). The MC even gets to tell her wife that she should never consider herself secondary or unimportant.

All of these are nice, but at the end of the day they're all scraps. I'd equate it to how we're allowed to give Kiara compliments on the final two chapters, but the white women around her still get a far bigger chunk of space, story and attention dedicated to them. The team have a pattern of adding these tiny tidbits that will temporarily satisfy stans while still maintaining the status quo, and that's precisely what's happening here. Its important for us to understand this. Underneath all this surface concern and all these scraps, Hana is still getting dust in place of actual story and characterization. And given that they made ZERO major changes to Hana's scenes in TRR 2.0, I'm not expecting that to change.

As for the book in general...I don't have to go into why this book is a mess, do I? We all know. We've all witnessed how disproportionate the writing has been and while I'm glad more and more people recognize what I've been seeing since Book 3, it's sad that it took 9 whole chapters in Walker Ranch for so many to understand exactly how much space Drake has been eating up for no good reason.

BLACK HOLES AND WHITE TEARS

I'll begin this section by talking about Drake Walker. He's the most prominent sign of the larger problem.

Drake Walker is what I call a Black Hole LI. And yes I mean black hole as in the one that exists in space (Beckett from TE also fits into this category). He is the kind of LI that sucks up everything. Love. Light. Joy. Common sense. Other characters' spaces.

He is the kind of love interest that will have Liam's traumatic experience centered around him. The kind of love interest for whose problems - largely created by his mammoth ego - we have to resolve in Shanghai, the home of the lone female LI. While that same female LI gets nothing, and then disappears in a subsequent chapter. The kind of love interest whose love confession can take precedence even over the MC's own issues (remember the Beaumont House chapter in Book 1? The one that took place the day after Tariq nonconsensually kissed the MC? 98% of the dialogue revolved around Drake's feelings. Not about the faulty lock, not the possibility that the MC's security had been tampered with - Drake's feelings). The kind of love interest that was given an entire extra wedding and artwork for his mother in Book 3 itself - none of which were given to any other LI.

A Black Hole LI is totally the kind of LI that would get 9 whole chapters in their home while we have never even visited the homes of the others since the early books of the previous series.

This wasn't something that began just this book. It's been a constant since Book 2, and you can even see signs of his story gaining way more importance in Book 1. It's also not something we can - in all honesty - blame simply on finances and fan popularity: the writers confirmed Drake to be one of their favourites, and attempts to give his scenes additional perks (eg plot elements pushed into both the Whiskey scene and the Beaumont Office scene) happened long before they could make any conclusions about his popularity. I bought the Beaumont Office scene to find out more about that family. I bought the Marshmallow scene so I could find out more about Liam and Hana's conversation post Coronation (remember - Hana was never even allowed to speak about her return to Cordonia because that scene was given to Drake). I bought the Italian Restaurant scene to learn more about Liam's assassination. The funny thing about all these three is that these were their stories to tell, yet Drake is the focus. Quite a few of Drake's initial scenes sold because the team consistently made the effort, consistently ensured that the information from his scenes would benefit us in the long run. The narrative allowed for Drake to have his own story, and additionally let aspects of his story overshadow that of the other LIs' (see the examples I've given above). Even though he has very little of value to contribute to the larger story (no job, his friendships are shallower than a wash-basin, and no genuine communication with any commoner in the story - only endless whining).

The treatment Drake gets that no other LI does, is a problem in itself, but it also is a small part of an even bigger issue. He isn't the only white character who gets this sort of attention and detail to his story.

Take Olivia, for example. Started out as a rival to the MC, before her sad sad childhood and her genuine love for Liam was revealed in the Book 1 finale. Over the course of the story, her role changed from petty rival to Warrior Duchess to reluctant bff. Over the course of the original series, Olivia became one of the most prominent characters in the story, on par with the male LIs. I'm not sure how many people realize that Lythikos is the ONLY duchy in the kingdom we've seen thrice (four times if you count Holiday). To give you an idea of how big a deal that is, here's how many times we've visited other duchies besides the capital and Applewood:

Fydelia - 2

Portavira - 1

Castelserraillian - 1

Ramsford (the home of our sponsors!) - 1

Hana's mother's home - Never.

Lythikos has a detailed familial and cultural history, and I wouldn't be lying if I said we know more about this one region than we know about the entire country of Cordonia. And honestly for me, the obsession with this one duchy has reached saturation point. Lythikos is not Cordonia. Lythikos is not all there is to Cordonia or even the only place that should matter. Yet it seems the team is more than eager to flog that horse until there's nothing of interest left.

Olivia is the only character who gets an entire mini book that revolves around comforting her and making her feel better about her background and origins. I don't think we've ever given Hana this much attention when she left her home for us. Or when she was being bullied by Madeleine. Or when she was the other bride in that grand wedding. Or when we received the news that carrying a child to term would be dangerous for her body. Or --

We were given an entire mini-book to comfort Olivia - the woman who continued to call Hana "damaged goods" and " a failure" for not marrying a man, while Hana's friend/wife stood by and watched. The woman who didn't have to think twice before making snide remarks about an equally skilled courtier who never did her any harm, only because she could get away with it. Istg when I heard that most of the court snubbed her during that first event in Holiday, this was my reaction:

Like girl I feel bad for you but at least now you know how it feels to be held responsible for shit beyond your control!

Hana, in the meantime, is forced time and again into situations that would break most people - but with very little payoff. Her arc with her parents was given a resolution that confirmed that Hana could only be considered worthy if she was useful. She was made to interact time and again with the woman who harmed her with such glee in Book 2. The MC - as a friend or as a wife - is at best neglectful of her issues and at worst someone who uses and discards Hana as she sees fit. And now...in her romantic playthrough she's given a storyline that doesn't allow her to bear children easily, and the MC spends less than two minutes to actually check on her. Hana is one of the co-protagonists, yet a side character given the treatment she should be getting. One could technically blame finances for the way she's being treated too, but keep in mind that the bad treatment goes as far back as the Applewood chapters in Book 1. Technically a time when she was bringing in money.

I get it. Olivia is a fan favourite. Many in the fandom wanted her to be an LI, the writers didn't, so they carved out this middle path where she'd have a major portion of the story anyway. But keep in mind that a lot of this attention came - and is still coming - at the cost of Hana. The team pretty much gave Olivia what they'd been refusing to give Hana all along.

On a smaller scale, you see similar patterns with the secondary characters - especially the women of the court. Madeleine and Penelope had elaborate backstories designed to make people forgive and sympathize with them, and Kiara - even though her backstory in Book 1 was inherently tragic and deserved to be handled sensitively - was given validation with great reluctance from the team, and with no consequences if we treated her cruelly. Even now, the team has only tossed Kiara a couple of scraps in the final chapter, while already setting the stage for Madeleine to get her own tragic "patriotism" arc for TRH Book 2, and a possible wedding for Penelope in the near future.

The difference here doesn't just lie in who gets attention and who doesn't. It lies in how the MC is supposed to view these women as well. A lot more sympathy and understanding is automatically extended to the white women, and the MC faces consequences if she fails to acknowledge their pain. Far less sympathy is offered by default to the black and the Asian woman - the MC may be friends with Hana but a huge chunk of their relationship is mostly about the MC benefiting from Hana's skills without giving much in return.

Even though their misdeeds are acknowledged and spoken about, both Madeleine and Penelope are written in such a way that the problems they're currently facing matter more than anything they've ever done in the past. Hana is made to sweet-talk Madeleine despite being bullied by her in a previous book. The MC herself never gets ANY opportunity to directly address what Penelope put her through in Portavira, because what the MC went through matters less than Penelope's condition.

Compare this to the relatively small scale of Kiara's "misdeed" (being honest about not continuing with an alliance - I'm surprised people think this is an actual thing to be offended about!), and the way the MC is allowed to mistreat her sans consequences afterwards. We're even allowed to call Kiara a snob in the books - which isn't at all true if you look at any of her scenes in canon - and constantly make fun of her desire to learn (in fact, if anyone in the series could be called a snob, it would be Olivia). If I were to sum up how a woman of colour is spoken about in the books, vs a white woman - this screenshot would do the trick:

(Notice how none of the options to speak about Penelope allow us to speak rudely of her, yet in Kiara's case we're allowed to make judgements on her as a person. In Hana's case, while we don't exactly drag her the way we can drag Kiara - we get precious few opportunities to actually defend or support her when others talk rubbish about her).

When you explore the series overall, it's impossible to ignore the casual racism that makes disrespecting people of a certain race/colour easier than on another. It's impossible not to see where the narrative chooses to give consequences to an MC who treats a white woman badly, and where it allows the very same MC to suspect, and then (optionally) gaslight, a woman of colour a couple chapters later. It's impossible not to see which people are meant to be respected despite their bad behaviour, and which people can still be treated badly despite their better behaviour. It's impossible not to see a pattern emerging.

This is not even a problem that plagues only the TRR series. From TCaTF to ACOR to Platinum to even MoTY, there is an ongoing pattern of discrepancies between the way white people and people of colour - particularly women - are treated. Many POC characters are placed in situations where it's easier for them to suffer/die/be shown disrespect, than it is to show them kindness or mercy. MOC are regularly either exoticized (Prince Hamid is the most glaring example of this) or placed in very traumatic situations for which the payoff isn't always going to be that great (I know this happens to Dallas, but I don't know about the payoff for Syphax).

WOC particularly suffer quite a bit in a lot of PB novels, in comparison to their white counterparts. Rowan Thorne of TCaTF, as a character, didn't deserve for her death to be made easier than her survival (in contrast to Diavolos, who was given far more opportunities AND will live simply by virtue of allying with Kenna), any more than Kiara deserved to be interrogated by the people who should have been concerned for her safety or Xanthe deserved to be shipped to slavery. All this, while a Vanessa (who is in a position of power and who plays an active role in rendering the MOTY MC financially helpless) gets a diamond scene where she "explains" her situation and a Madeleine doesn't even have to hear about her bullying from her victims.

The fandom, too, has contributed to this on a number of occasions. Speaking specifically of TRR, how many times have we seen Hana being dragged on Olivia posts? (also, if we were really measuring Olivia by the impossible standards that we held for Hana's characterization, Olivia would appear pretty damn one-note too: after all, 80% of her characterization consists of knife jokes). How many times was Hana being looked at with disdain for either her niceness or the poor writing for her, while the same fandom would regularly coo over a nice-presenting Penelope (whose characterization is one of the most inconsistent in the series)? How many times have we seen Kiara being called a creep/obsessed for merely looking at a man, while almost no one judges Olivia for kissing a man without his consent? How many times have people forgiven a traitorous Penelope and hated on a far more innocent Kiara in the same breath? How often did the fandom hate on Liam for accepting the MC's advances after she rejected him, yet not say a word when Drake did the same thing? How many times has Maxwell been loved for his humour and childlike nature while people of colour with a similar personality (Lily from Bloodbound, for example) were hated on instantly? Clearly, there have been more instances of people in the fandom sympathizing automatically with the white character, than with characters of colour. Time and again, brown and black characters - particularly women - have been required to match up to impossible standards (if they're nice they're boring. If they don't like the MC they're <insert every gendered sexist insult you can think of here>). The standards are far more relaxed for white characters, and they're often given more breathing room and to most of what they want without the constant judgement that black and brown women get. The standards set up for both are grossly different.

Racism is a beast that assumes many forms - and not all forms of racism will appear obvious to some, especially when such stereotypes are so normalized in media and popular fiction that we almost accept it at first. Almost. To get to the root of why there's such an imbalance in this series - among others - we need to first acknowledge the sexism and racism that are such a vital part of its narrative, and that its fandom regularly buys into and (sometimes unwittingly) promotes.

At this point, it's important to understand that having queer characters or characters of colour simply exist in the books isn't enough. Token rep can be found in PB's books by the dozens, but at the end of the day it means nothing if there is a constant reluctance, over and over and over, to treat those characters with the same care and sensitivity that they treat their white ones (or their "exoticized brown" ones).

• Like I mentioned earlier, I won't be playing TRH from this point forward, but I do hope to finish my TRR QTs soon. I have a LOT of thoughts! If you'd like to be tagged on those, do tell me!

[jovialyouthmusic]

Silver Service

Has Bastien finally run Anton to ground? Drake returns to Applewood to find his mentor absent.

Word Count 3289

A/N  warnings - a little implied smut. Not suitable for under 18s

11 Making Plans

Anton scowled as he looked out over the ground far below the airplane.

‘Why the hell are we travelling by this beat up old piece of shit? Why aren’t we in a jet – what happened to the helicopter?’ Claudius cleared his throat

‘Funds are low, Sir’ he said ‘We had counted on everything coming together after the coronation, but the gunman put paid to it all’

‘I’d like to know who hired that amateur – he should have hit his mark instead of botching the job’ he snarled

‘We’re still trying to find out, Sir’ he answered ‘and that’s not easy considering the King’s guard have him under lock and key’

‘Why the fuck don’t we have surveillance?’ he raged ‘What do I pay you for?’

‘I’m sorry Sir, since the botched assassination the Guard are on high alert. They’ve had staff at all the significant houses re vetted. We’ve still got one or two operatives but they daren’t make a move until they need to’

‘How about that bitch Lucretia?’ he asked

‘She’s at Applewood, where the King and Olivia retreated when the Palace was evacuated. That seems to be the base of operations right now, the head of the guard and his woman are there – and Walker and the American woman too. Apparently the whole court are touring Cordonia, attending charity events at any Duchy that cares to host one’ Anton rose an eyebrow

‘That could be turned to our advantage. We need to pay close attention to the itinerary’

-------

Damien hit the tarmac running. They had decided landing at the same airfield as Claudius would be too risky, so an SUV waited to take himself and James there as fast as possible. The fact that they had travelled by jet and the others had been in an ordinary prop plane meant that they had some time in hand. A second vehicle tailed them, and they set off at breakneck speed, calling Bastien to keep him up to date.

The roads they had to travel were narrow and little used. They needed to get close to the airfield and wait for them to leave. Their luggage had tracking devices, so unless they got wind of that, all they had to do was to follow at a distance and maintain surveillance of their destination. Simply arresting them straight away would mean that they would miss out on discovering his power base. From the location of the airfield there were a number of possibilities – they may be based in Valtoria, Portaviera or the Commery Isles, presuming that they didn’t travel any further afield.

They had the advantage of the Charity tour under their belt. They had locations set but the itinerary was still fluid. Bastien planned for the tour to go as close and as soon as possible to Anton’s location so that they could either force him to act and make himself vulnerable, or make their own move to take him out.

Damien had little idea of the terrain and geography of Cordonia, so was relying on James to keep him informed. They parked the SUV in a field entrance half a mile from the airfield, out of sight of the only road that serviced the tiny runway. That road lead to a wider main road, where the other SUV waited to cover the least likely direction that Anton was likely to take. They expected him to make for the road to Valtoria, where another road junction would determine whether he was aiming to go further to the coast at Portaviera, or further still to the Commery Isles.

James told him that the duchy of Valtoria currently had no Duke or Duchess, as the childless Duchess had passed away a few weeks ago. She was reclusive and little was known of her affiliation for or against Constantine, so there was a possibility that Anton might be making for that location. The nobility at Portaviera was known to be sympathetic to Liam, so the last prospect of someone sympathetic to the Sons of the Earth was Lord Neville Delacouer in the Commery Isles. He had been a staunch supporter of Constantine, and appeared to pay allegiance to the new King, but he was an unpleasant character. He often said one thing to the new King’s face and another to other members of the council of nobles when discussing Liam’s ideas of admitting commoners to the Council.

He breathed a sigh of relief when his phone pinged at the presence of the tracking devices planted at the Monaco border. Half an hour later, a car passed the road end, and James eased out to follow at a discrete distance - out of sight but within signal range.

Half an hour later, the car bearing Anton Severus made the turn toward Valtoria.

-------

‘Valtoria, you say?’ Liam said thoughtfully. ‘I was considering who to award the Duchy to now that Duchess Van Hausen has passed away without an heir. The manor is still occupied by her staff and they’re maintaining it until it has a new owner. I suppose if she sympathised with Anton, he might make use of the estate.’ He turned to Bastien ‘Has the staff been vetted recently?’

‘We’ve made our best efforts, but with the recent funeral arrangements it’s been difficult, and she was so reclusive that we didn’t even have a list available. I’m uncertain as to whether to back off or go ahead with the checks. If we don’t do the same as we are with the other duchies, it might make him suspicious.’

‘At your discretion, Bastien’ Liam replied ‘I trust your judgement. Just let me know what you’re doing and I’ll give you whatever funding you need’

‘Thankyou Sir. I had planned to send the charity tour where Anton was going, but it’s a bit tricky as there’s nobody available to arrange an event for Valtoria’

‘Don’t they have the annual lantern event coming up?’ Liam said ‘We could contact the majordomo at the Manor and suggest we use that to raise money for their chosen cause’

‘Excellent Idea, your Grace’ Bastien said ‘I’m sure I can involve Nazario. I’ll contact him and we can start making plans’

------

‘So our first stop is Valtoria?’ Sophia asked Bastien as she stacked the plates from their dinner to go back to the kitchens. ‘It all seems rather last minute’

‘It is, the date of the festival is fixed and it’s fortuitous that it’s only two days away’ answered Bastien ‘That gives us time to reconnoitre the manor before the Court arrives.’ Sophia stopped and looked at him intently.

‘Us?’ she questioned ‘You said you’d step back from active duty’ He sighed.

‘I have to be nearby’ he said ‘I can’t do everything remotely from here, if communications break down it could be catastrophic, no matter how much I trust my men’ Sophia crossed her arms and glared at him. He shrugged ‘I’ll be in a surveillance van away from the action, but close enough to follow in when the coast is clear’

‘And when do you judge that the coast is clear?’ she asked tartly. He got up and stood in front of her, taking her hands in his and looking intently into her eyes.

‘Sophia, you have to trust me. I’ve been doing this for a long time. You’ll be safe here, I’ll assign you your own guard – James is with Damien right now’ She looked down in defeat.

‘I’m sorry Bas, it just makes me feel nervous. I can’t lose you now’ He let go of her hands and rubbed her upper arms before drawing her to him.

‘I promise I’ll come back to you’ he said as she nestled into his broad chest and her scent rose to him. ‘This is my job, and when Anton has been neutralised I can rest easy – and so can you, and Liam and Olivia as well.’ He squeezed her tight ‘Believe me, I don’t want to lose you either, and this is the best I can do to protect you as well as my King and my country.’ She drew back and looked up at him

‘That’s what you said before’ she said in a small voice.

‘I have Damien to help me this time, as well as all my men.’ Bastien went on reassuringly ‘He’s got a good reputation – he’s the best man for the job. We have the advantage this time too. We know where Anton is and if we move fast enough he won’t be ready for us’ She smiled wanly

‘When are you going?’ she asked

‘Soon, Lewis will call when we’re ready to go’ he said, and took her over to the couch, sitting and drawing her down next to him, wrapping her in his embrace. She rested her head on his chest again, and this time he inclined his head so that his chin rested on hers and her hair tickled his nose. He took a deep calming breath which she subconsciously copied. He felt her warmth and closed his eyes to commit every sense of her to memory so he could recall it when he needed the strength to remember his purpose. He felt the vibration of the phone in his pocket. Lewis was calling him away.

------

Riley held on to the door handle of the SUV grimly as Drake barrelled down the track toward the tarmacked road. She knew rebuking him for rattling her around like an egg in a carton would do no good – in fact he might show off his driving skills more, so she gritted her teeth and endured. He chatted amiably as if his driving was the most natural normal thing in the world.

‘You really showed some skill catching fish for dinner’ he said ‘Next time I’ll leave you by the lake and I’ll go off after bigger game’ A vision of him coming back down the track with a deer across his shoulders briefly flashed through her imagination, and she shook her head to get rid of the image. She wondered whether it would be better not to tell him outright that roughing it had been a little harder than she had imagined.

It wasn’t that she liked her creature comforts – a decent bathroom for one – but a little more concession to modern life would have been nice. At least the bed had been comfortable, she told herself.

Ah, the bed. A smile flickered across her face and fixed itself as she remembered the times between the fishing and cooking and hiking. Their limbs entangled, lips grazing over bare skin, fingertips caressing, stroking and pressing. Waves of pleasure that seemed to go on forever before ebbing away leaving the glow of satiation, only to begin again just as she thought they were done. Those times were incredible – she could forgive him anything in return for what he gave to her without holding back anything. She gave her all in return, and the memory of former lovers faded into insignificance.

At last they turned onto the main road, and she breathed a sigh of relief. He turned up the music and started to sing at the top of his lungs. She laughed at his choice and couldn’t help but sing along with him.

‘Country roads, take me hooooome to the plaaaace I belooooooong’ but even as she sang, laughter bubbling up under the words, she couldn’t help but wonder where ‘home’ was – for her, for Drake…did they belong together? It hadn’t been long since they had admitted their feelings for each other but she felt as if she’d met her soulmate. Could she make her home here in this odd little country? Would he follow her back to New York if she asked? Would he want to go back to where he was born, in Texas? What would they do to make a living? She looked over at him and he grinned back at her before paying attention to the road again. She resolved to put her thoughts aside for now and go with the flow.

They drew into the courtyard at Applewood, and Drake frowned.

‘There’s not many vehicles here’ he mused, looking at the row of parked cars, noting that the limos were still there, but all but one of the SUVs were missing. That meant Liam was still there, but a good portion of Bastien’s men were elsewhere. He couldn’t make sense of it, and went straight to the security suite. He found Phillipo there, widely recognised as Lewis’s right hand man, just as Lewis was to Bastien.

‘What the hell’s going on – where’s Bastien?’ he questioned him as he looked up from his desk.

‘Walker’ he acknowledged ‘Mr Lykel is out in the field’

‘I thought he wasn’t on active duty anymore’ he quizzed him ‘Didn’t he send James and Damien out to do that?’

‘Captain Lykel said to give you this’ he said, handing him an envelope. He tapped the side of his nose in a gesture he knew the Guard used in situations where it was possible that others could overhear them. He frowned and opened his mouth, but the other man shook his head to caution him to silence. He nodded and took the envelope, going back out into the courtyard to Riley. She raised her eyebrows in query and he took her hand.

‘Let’s go for a walk’ he said ‘I need to think’ he showed her the envelope, pressing his finger to his lips, and they set off toward the orchard. Once there, he leaned against the trunk of a tree and opened it, Riley watching but saying nothing, aware that he needed to concentrate. The note was handwritten, and he recognised Bastien’s neat square letters.

Walker

I still cannot be certain that I have discovered all of Constantine’s covert surveillance devices so send this to you in the strictest confidence. Look to see if the seal has been tampered with. There is a small possibility that others may know of any remaining devices and have use of them. Use the utmost discretion as to who to discuss the contents of this letter with and destroy it as soon as you can. I have faith that you know who you can trust, but be cautious.

Nazario and James have tracked Severus and two other men to Valtoria. You know the state of affairs there. In two days’ time the Lantern festival will be held, and Liam and Olivia will attend with the rest of the court. Before then, I go with the Guard to flush Anton out and neutralise him. I plan not to take an active part, but you know these things sometimes change.

If I know you as well as I might, I know your first thought will be to follow me. I urge you to stay where you are and protect Riley and Sophia, and help if you can to observe and protect Liam and Olivia. Take note of anything and anyone that appear suspicious. I trust you to do the right thing to protect those you and I hold dear. If by any chance you do not see me again, do what you can for Sophia. If all goes well, by the time the lantern ceremony takes place, Anton will no longer be a threat.

Take care son

Bastien

He sat and stared at the letter before handing it to Riley to read. He stood and paced while she read it and when she had finished, he took it back and tucked it inside his shirt.

‘We need to find Sophia and talk to her’ he said.

------

There was a note of panic in the voice of the person on the other end of the phone.

‘The lantern festival, your Majesty? We haven’t held that for years. The Duchess didn’t like strangers in the grounds after the Duke passed on’

‘I thought it would be appropriate to revive it in celebration of the change of monarch. You know, letting go of the old and making a wish for the future.’ Liam explained levelly. ‘I know it’s asking a lot, but all the other Duchies are arranging charity events. Surely as a loyal Valtorian you’d wish to raise money for a worthy cause in your area? I’d heard the orphanage needs some renovation’

‘Of course your Majesty, it’s just that it’s such short notice’ The woman, Gladys, claimed to be head of staff at Valtoria Manor. She had submitted a list of all those on staff, and Bastien had put one of his men on to vetting them properly. So far nothing suspicious had come up. All were from families who had been born in the Duchy. There were no examples of criminal records and none of the names cropped up as sympathisers of anti Monarchy groups.

‘Are you able to offer accommodation?’ he asked ‘I know the Duchess was rather – reclusive in her latter years, but I remember visiting it as a child and staying in the state rooms’

‘I – of course all the rooms were maintained properly even after we closed the gates to guests, but I’m not sure if we have the linen or bedclothes…’

‘Send a list of what you need to my head of household. Now the Palace is closed for renovations we have plenty to spare, or we can provide funds to buy new. If staffing is a problem, I can send a team to help with the organisation of the festival. Some of the other venues are taking advantage of their expertise.’ He drew himself up into his regal posture, even though she could not see him. It changed the timbre of his voice as he continued – deeper and more commanding but with an air of sympathy. ‘Gladys, I’m sure you understand that after the attack at the coronation, Cordonia needs some positive news and goals. I sincerely hope I can count on you to help your duchy make a contribution’ There was a short silence at the other end of the line.

‘Of course your Majesty, I’ll do my best’

‘Excellent, I’ll send someone over to help you’ He ended the call, smiling in triumph.

--------

Damien took control of his breath, steady and even as he approached the driveway of Valtoria Manor. It was well that he was a good mimic, and ever since he had landed in Cordonia he had listened carefully to the people around him. It helped that he had Bastien as an example of the accent in the preceding years. He didn’t expect to pass as native to the country, but explain that his Cordonian parents had moved to America when he was young, hence the faint accent and sketchy knowledge of their culture and customs. He hope it would be enough to make anyone he encountered comfortable with his manner of speaking. The gates were closed and he drew the car level with the intercom, getting out and pressing the call button.

After a short while it crackled into life, and a woman answered curtly

‘Hello – state your business please’

‘Hi, you’re expecting me I hope. King Liam asked me to come and help you organise the lantern festival. He’s recently taken me on staff to assist with all the forthcoming events.’ There was a short silence before the gates swung open and he got back into the car to drive in. Bastien had suggested he wear a wire, but he refused, saying it was too risky. He did however have a listening device in the car, and he spoke quietly as he swung the vehicle into the courtyard to see a woman stepping forward to meet him.

‘Nazario to Lykel. I’m in’

Next Chapter 12 Just Desserts?

[i-write-sometimes-blog]

Animals - Negan Werewolf AU

Note: This is a little thing I wrote for the  “ Negan’s Fall Writing Challenge” created by the lovely @thewalkingdead-imagines​ ! This is my second time joining a Negan’s challenge, and I gotta say I really enjoy every word, also was my first time writing an AU, oh boy it gave me so much ideas but had to do this short, college was kind of a bitch, but anyways, here it is! Let me know what you think.

So basically it’s kind of the same space and time from the show but instead of walkers humans started to become werewolf, so I guess it’s not big difference.

The leaves cracked under your feet as you ran through the dark forest, your heart pumping real fast, heavily breathing you kept running as fast as your tired legs allow you, a dense fog covering the woods made the night even darker, you could hardly see, but clearly heard them. Wolves, at least three of them, big, strong, furious and hungry, ready to attack.

They were dangerous close, getting closer and closer to you somewhere in the fog, waiting for the right moment. You focused on the road, trying not to fall down but still careful and ready to shoot. Soon enough you heard fast and heavy footsteps not far for you, watching for the corner of your eyes you caught a grey wolf running close so you raised your gun and quickly fired at them, they cried out as the bullet hit their side and fell to the ground.

You kept running through the dark woods leaving the wolf behind. There were still two of them left. You still hoped for a place to hide, you knew you wouldn't make it back to Alexandria, it was way far and with the wolves hunting it’d be almost impossible for you to even find the way home. So your only chance was to hide and wait for the day to come.

Suddenly a figure appeared in front of you growling, a big brown beast with a killing face looking at you, showing their big pointy teeth. Slowly they came closer never stopped looking at you they started tracing a circle around you, as another one joined. Breathing uneasy you looked at them, your finger stuck to the trigger and your heart racing as your mind was trying to find a way out.

One of the wolves moved a little closer licking their lips, you were ready to kill them and so they were when suddenly they stopped and raised their ears, they started to sniff something in the air you couldn’t, and then a clear whistle rumble through the woods, after a small silence it sound again. The wolves got scared, lowered their ears and hid their tail between their legs when a male throaty laugh spread for the forest. 

“Well, damn” the deep voice said sending a cold shiver down your spine. “Looks like some doggies are hunting in my territory” he said. The wolves nervously cried, you could see them clearly shaking out of fear, it gave you chills and slowly you felt a lump forming in your throat.

“And I do not allow it” he raised his voice again firm and clear,  but no signal of him to see, just that powerful voice. He laught one more time and then you saw him. His tall figure standing in the middle of the road, wearing some grey pants, a leather jacket and a blood red scarf that made his handsome features stand out: his gray beard adorned with a pair of dimples, his fine yet rough nose, his black hair smoothed back and those hazel eyes. 

You stood there unknown of what to do, afraid to move or even blink, your whole body beginning to fill with adrenaline. 

“Now” he stepped forward. “Run” 

And that's exactly what you did. Your body moved without a second thought trying to put as much distance as possible between  you and that man. The wolves stayed, behind you the sound of growls made stronger but you didn’t dare to know what was going on. Then a wolf cried, the sound turned into a scream, a human scream full of pain. You felt goosebumps and an urge to run away. 

With your heart racing you continued running, looking back from time to time hoping nothing was following you but the moonless night wouldn’t let you. After a while you stopped to catch your breath, your legs way too tired out to keep running but you knew if you stop whoever was that man could find you. You wondered what happened after you ran, on wolf was dead no question, but did that man kill them? if so how? and why they feared so much?, somehow your head was unable to forget him.

The wolves often showed no emotions but hunger and fury, it was quite weird to see them as scared as that, and that meant danger not only for you but for your entire community, Alexandria. You have joined with your group a time ago. It was a nice place, with people living almost as the world had not went to shit but most important it had walls. Your group had already faced many threats and bad people and of course, the wolves, and the most recent enemies a group called The Saviors, but this guy was a real danger you could tell.

Finally after walking much you found an old cabin, finally a place you could hide and rest until the morning, now the daylight didn't guarantee your security but it meant at least you could find the right way home. 

The fatigue on your body made you fell asleep before you noticed, but almost immediately a knock in the door woke you up and made you flinch. You stepped close to the door quietly gun in hand. A knock again, before you heard him.

“Hey, open the door, babe” your stomach turned as you hear the voice of that man wearing a leather jacket you met in the woods. You stayed quiet, while you hear his playful laugh. “C’mon darling, I know you’re in there… can smell you” with that your whole body filled with tension.

“I won't hurt you” He said not receiving an answer. You doubted but decided to open without lowering the gun. And there he was, his tall body leaning against the doorframe, blood splashed over his features. “Easy, baby” he calmly said looking from you to the gun. “I’m Negan” 

You kept silence watching him, fearing him. His name was repeating in the back of your head, you were sure you have heard it before but couldn't remember where. The only thing you knew for sure was that you shouldn't make him mad, just in case.

“I’m, (y/n)” you said. He smirked.

“Well, (y/n) it seems to me, you are very far from home, aren’t you?” he raised his hand and slowly made you lower your gun “You won’t need this, I won’t hurt you, I told you before” he took the gun away from you hands. 

“What do you want?” You told him, looking at his eyes with fury. He hold your gaze and smiled softly and then raised his voice again “Take a sit in that comfy ass couch behind you, I need to talk to you for a bit” He ordered. Afraid, you did as he said, keeping you hand close to the knife on your belt.

He kept silence for a second and then he spoke.

“Listen, I know you’re from Alexandria, your friend Ricky has already killed a bunch of my men and I do not like that” You flinch as you heard he knew about your community. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about” you told him.

“Of course you know, sweetheart. I saw them and I saw you killing my men, and I am saying men ‘cuz they were still in their human form but even when they take their wolf shit form you still managed to kill them” he said death serious looking you deep in the eyes. Then he grined and let his back fell against the couch. “Now, I want to make a deal with your friends”

“What kind of deal? we barely have enough food for us and also we don’t want anything  from you” you were angry, your voice let that clear and your clenched fists too. Negan sigh.

“Protection. You work for me, you do what I say and I can protect you from other packs.” So he was one of them, he was a wolf. The man approached to you, his finger traveled to your chin and he forced you to look at him, centimeters distant to him you feel his warm breath “I just gave you a sample, sweetheart. Those wolves would have eat you if I wasn’t there, so maybe a thank you would be better than you complaining at me”

You look at him with hate on your eyes, moving your head to get out of his grab. Yes, he was indeed a real trouble for your safety, so you decided to play easy.

“Thanks” 

“Good girl” he smirked at you. He stood up before grabbing you by the arm and made his way to the door. “Now, to show you what a gentleman I am, I'm going to take you home.” as you stepped out of the old cabin he let go of your arm, then he transformed. He raised his head jaw clenched, his gaze darken while hair covered his body and all his human parts begun to change, the legs and arms got to the floor becoming like claws. All his handsome face features became larger, his teeth grew bigger and sharp. They he stood, a massive black wolf with hazel eyes, Negan.

He made his way to you, delicate movements he traced in his wolf form, until he was right in front of you, his face almost reached your chin, he was a really big wolf. His warm breath hitting in your face, you had never seen a wolf this close, it was both beautiful and scary at the same time.

Negan gave you a look and you knew he wanted you to crawl over his body, carefully you did, placing your arms around his neck. Once he felt you over him, he started running through the woods at high speed, the cold air hitting you face made you hold tight, feeling his soft hair and his warm body pressed against yours. And just for a moment you felt like you were safe, but the feeling didn’t last, quickly you were at Alexandria’s gates, standing beside the big bad wolf who howled and pretty soon you were surrounded by a whole pack of growling wolves. Up in the watchtowers you saw your friends having no idea of what was about to come. You turned your head to the side only finding out Negan was back in his human form, he winked at you before starting walking near the gates, whistling as he did in the woods but this time, his pack, now fully human whistled with him. 

“Hello” Negan called out, you saw Rick opening the gate’s curtain.

“Who are you?” your friend said cold, making the taller man laugh.

“Well, I see where this baby girl learned his manners” he joked looking at you, “I’m Negan, and those dirty men overthere are my Saviors.” he said moving almost theatrical, dangerous, “Here’s the thing, Rick, isn’t it? You and your gang killed a damn bunch of my goddamn Saviors” Negan bust off lowering the tone of his voice, making you flinch. You hopped your group were prepared, hoped for them to just start shooting and end with this already, but at the same time you knew it could only make it worse, those were werewolves, bigger, faster and more powerful than regular humans like you, there were people inside the gates who never had even seen one like this, so if Rick wanted Alexandria to survive he must think wisely.

“But you know what, Rick?” the sound of his voice got you out of your thoughts. “I am not mad at you. I’m happy that we could finally meet. Also brought you a little but damn hot gift to prove you I’m a real man” you felt his gaze lying on you while he spoke. “Come here, babe”. furios you stepped next to him.

“(y/n) are you alright?” You saw Carl behind his father looking at you with worried eyes, this kid was strong but also had a big heart and you knew it.

“I’m fine, nothing to worry about kid”  you started to say.

“Hell yeah, she’s totally right kiddo” Negan interrupted you. “Her sweet ass is safe and alive thanks to me, young man” he said slinging an arm over your shoulders. Oh this man was enjoying himself, being in charge, he liked it.

“Get your finger outta her!” you heard Daryl growling angry, he was a close friend and after all you’ve been through he and the rest of the group became your family.

“Everybody shut the shit down!” the leader of the Savior screamed. “I was in a good mood but now I’m starting to think which one of you I should take for dinner. Let's make this quick” he spoke walking along the gates, “There’s one and only one option out of this, you work for me you provide for me, you do shit I say, you’ll be alright. I will give you my service and we are all nice. As I said, It is your only option, so whatcha say?” 

“What’s your price?” Shaking his head Rick spoke. “We don’t have much”

“And we don’t need you” you raised your voice. You couldn't have this deal, it gave u goosebumps. Negan turned in his heels, and walked directly to you.

“I like her” he said a few inches from you. “She got spirit, maybe I’ll keep her” he smirked at you. “Now, Rick. I want half of your food, and anything I like.”

“No” you answered. “We are starving here, if you take that away many people will die, we can’t…”

“(y/n)” you heard Rick trying to calm you but Negan raised his hand in signal for him to stop. 

“I really like you, sweetheart. But maybe you should learn that sometimes you gotta shut that pretty mouth of yours”

“We’re not doing it.” You told him serious. “I already thank you for saving me, but we are not going to give you our food, there children in there, families, you can’t ask us for that kind of things, give us time, we’ll find something else but not food” you stared at him with cold eyes, you were trying to protect your family.

“Well I can, and I am asking you to. Sorry to disappoint you baby but I take what I want when I want it” he hissed. “So, I want half of your shit! Now this land belongs to me, everything Rick, you work for me now so I want my shit ready when I come back” he yelled out pissed. “And you, (y/n)” he held your chin up, his eyes darkened, his fangs growing as he spoke. “You belong to me” 

For the corner of your eyes you saw his men turning into wolves again, suddenly you weren’t looking at a man anymore but a black beast with sharp teeth that somehow managed to get you once more on his back, dragging you quickly away from your family, from your home. He was a monster and now he was taking you to his place.