#and even on the days where i don't bleed much
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daisymbin · 17 hours ago
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"you used to love me " with mingyu x fem! Reader💗
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second chance prompt #44: "you used to love me."
mingyu had gotten used to the coldness in your voice. it wasn't always like this—there was a time when the sound of your laughter had been his favorite thing, when your touch had felt like home. but ever since the breakup, you had a way of cutting him down with sharp words and pointed looks, leaving him wondering where everything had gone wrong.
he didn't know why you hated him now. or at least, why you acted like you did.
“don’t you have anything better to do than linger around here?” you snapped one evening, your tone biting as mingyu hovered near your desk at the shared workspace for a project.
his brows furrowed. “i was just asking if you needed help. no need to bite my head off.”
“well, i don’t,” you replied curtly, your eyes fixed on the papers in front of you.
he clenched his jaw, forcing a polite nod. “got it.”
it wasn’t the first time you’d brushed him off like this. at a mutual friend's party, you'd made a snide comment about how “clingy” he used to be, loud enough for him to hear. when you’d run into him at the grocery store, you muttered something about how “some people just don’t know when to let go” before walking away without so much as a glance back.
but this time, it was different.
the final blow came on a late afternoon, after yet another tense encounter. mingyu had tried to make small talk, asking about your day, and you snapped, “why do you even care? you didn’t care enough when it actually mattered.”
his chest tightened, the words hitting him harder than he expected. for a moment, he just stared at you, his lips parting as if to say something but no sound coming out. finally, his voice broke through, soft and pained.
“you used to love me, you know,” he said, his eyes locking onto yours. “you don’t have to be like that... you don't have to be so mean.”
your breath caught, and for a moment, you faltered, but you quickly masked it with a scoff. “that’s in the past.”
he didn’t reply, just nodded slowly, shoulders heavy as he turned and walked away.
a few days later, you found yourself at the park for an outdoor charity event, mingyu nearby as usual, volunteering for the setup. you tried to avoid him, keeping your distance as much as possible.
but then you heard the commotion.
a crash, followed by a string of startled voices. you whipped around to see mingyu sprawled on the ground near a pile of fallen equipment, holding his arm awkwardly.
“gyu-ah!” you shouted as panic coarses through you, rushing over before you even realized what you were doing. he groaned, trying to sit up, but you dropped to your knees beside him, your hands trembling as they hovered over his arm.
“what were you thinking?” you snapped, but your voice cracked with worry. “you could’ve gotten seriously hurt!”
“im fine,” he said weakly, offering you a small, strained smile. “just a scratch.”
“a scratch?” you repeated, your voice rising. “mingyu, you’re bleeding!”
tears pricked your eyes as you fussed over him, checking his arm for more injuries. mingyu's eyebrows burrowed as he watched you in silence, his heart twisting at the sight of your panic.
“you’re always so reckless,” you muttered, your voice breaking as you pressed a clean cloth to his arm to stop the bleeding. “why do you always have to act like nothing matters? why can't you take better care of yourself? you scared me.”
he blinked, taken aback. “you were scared?”
“of course i was scared!” you snapped, tears spilling over now. “do you think i’d just stand there and do nothing if something happened to you? i—”
you stopped, realizing what you were about to say. your hands froze, still pressed against his arm, and you refused to meet his gaze.
“you still care about me,” mingyu said softly, his voice filled with quiet wonder.
you swallowed hard, shaking your head. “i... i don’t...”
“you do,” he pressed, leaning closer despite the pain in his arm. “you wouldn’t be like this if you didn’t.”
you bit your lip, fresh tears welling up. “what do you want me to say?” you asked in exasperation and frustration, your shoulders shaking. “what do you want me to do? why can't you just.. why do you keep making me worry? why can't you just stay away? why do you have to make moving on from you so hard? why cant you just let me be mean and hate you? its so much easier to just hate you than—”
mingyu could only watch helplessly as you choked over your sobs. his heart broke at your words, guilt washing over him. “i’m sorry,” he said, his voice thick with emotion. “for everything. for making you feel like you had to do that just to protect yourself. i... i didn't mean to," mingyu says defeatedly, "i know i probably don’t deserve it, but.. i miss us.”
your breath hitched, and he reached out hesitantly, his fingers brushing against yours. “i don’t want to hurt you again,” he continued, his voice soft and vulnerable. “but if there’s even the smallest part of you that’s willing to try again... i’d do anything to show you how much i still love you.”
you looked up at him, his sincerity clear in his eyes, and for the first time in a long while, the wall you’d built around your heart began to crack.
“i hate you,” you muttered as your fist balled and hits his chest, "i hate you so much," your voice trembling as the tears now fall freely.
still, mingyu smiled through his pain, knowing what this means. “i love you,” he confesses, "I love you so much,"
"I hate you," you repeat, your fist going up to hit his chest again.
this time, mingyu catches you by your wrist, "you hate me as much as you love me, sweetheart." at this, your eyes only waters more because you know he's right; you dont actually hate him.
mingyu's grip on your wrist loosened, his hand sliding down to intertwine with yours. his gaze softened, but he didn't let go, holding onto you like you were his lifeline.
"you hate me, but you're still here," he murmured, his voice trembling as he let out a bitter laugh. "you’re crying because of me, you’re still holding on, too."
your lips parted to argue, but nothing came out. the truth sat heavy in the air between you.
"stop it," you whispered instead, your voice wavering.
he shook his head, his free hand brushing against your cheek, wiping away a tear that had slipped down. "i love you," he says again softly, his thumb lingering on your skin. "i’m not asking you to forgive me right away. i’m not even asking you to love me again—"
"gyu-," you interrupted, your chest tightening at the vulnerability in his voice.
he smiled faintly, shaking his head. "no, just let me say this," he said, his voice quiet but firm. "all I'm asking for is a chance. a chance to show you that i can do better. that i can be the man you deserve to have by your side."
your heart pounded in your chest, his words hitting you with a force you weren’t prepared for. your walls wavered, the cracks growing wider with each syllable he spoke.
"and if you can’t," mingyu continued, his voice breaking slightly, "if you can’t give me that chance, i’ll walk away. i’ll leave you alone for good if that’s what you want."
you stared at him, your throat tight as tears threatened to spill again. his honesty was overwhelming, and for a moment, you hated how much you wanted to believe him.
"you used to love me," he voice soft & hoarse, it almost broke you. "and i know i messed it up. but if there’s even the smallest part of you that still does, just... let me fix it."
the silence between you felt deafening. your heart screamed at you to take the risk, but your head begged you to protect yourself.
you searched his face, looking for any hint of insincerity, but all you saw was him—raw, open, and so clearly in love with you that it hurt.
"you’re an idiot," you muttered, your voice breaking, but your grip on his hand didn’t falter.
mingyu let out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding, his lips curving into a relieved, almost disbelieving smile. "i missed hearing you say that," he said softly, pulling you closer.
you rolled your eyes, a weak laugh escaping you despite the tears still clinging to your lashes. "don’t push your luck."
"never," he said, his voice full of quiet determination as he pulled you into a gentle embrace. "i promise."
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4only1 · 2 days ago
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Hiiii there!
So I don't know about your rules so if you uncomfortable it's okay!!! 😊
Can you write a story where shingen and reader are married but reader doesn't want to be married and just wants a life of her own. So she runs away not knowing she was pregnant and when she finds out, she decideds to keep the baby and gives birth to twins a boy and a girl. Awhile reader is happy, shingen has gone completely insane looking for her.
Every day some dies do to the fact they couldn't find reader. But shingen learns where reader is hiding and goes himself to get only to find out she has given birth to gun and his twin sister.
They rest can be up to you! 😊
Thank you! 😊
Fear and Loathing
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Yamazaki Shingen x Reader Warning: Angst (I can't help myself) Masterlist ------------------------
It was all you felt for this lifestyle you had been forced into. Fear and loathing. Fear for the man you married, for the members of the clan who despised you enough to try and get rid of you. Loathing of the man you married, for the lifestyle forced upon you. 
Marriage was a silly thing to you. If it were actually your decision, you never would have married, let alone a man like Shingen Yamazaki. The man he once was had now become lethargic, empty, depressed. You didn’t like your married life before, and you certainly didn’t like it after his defeat. 
Once you were informed of the Yubitsume to take place, you couldn’t stay here any longer. It didn’t matter that you had supposedly sinned, you needed to leave. In the dead of night, you vanished. Nobody knew exactly how you left without so much as a trace, but it didn’t matter. What did, was the fact that Shingen was furious, with the other woman, with everyone who didn’t notice, but especially with you.
The bloodshed that followed was only contained once his brother, Shintaro, claimed they would find you. How he needed to put the clan first, and let them take care of finding you. Soon, one month passed, then two, then three, and as they did, Shingen became more restless. Where did you go, and what were you doing?
It was a taste of freedom unlike any other, one you had never known. You travelled far away, hidden within the depths of a small prefecture, no one knowing of who you truly were. You made a life for yourself, working at a small shop, supporting yourself, no longer constricted by the rules of the Yamazaki clan. Until you found out you were pregnant.
It wasn’t expected but not exactly surprising. You had been expected to give birth to the heir at some point, and it just had to be when you decided to run away. You decided to keep it, more trouble would come if you didn’t, and maybe if you delivered the heir, you could bargain for freedom for yourself. It was selfish, but you never asked for this life, and certainly not this child. 
As your pregnancy progressed, you became depressed at the fact of giving birth to the Yamazaki clan's heir. You couldn’t do this, this child would tie you to the clan forever, regret sank in. It hit even harder when you discovered it was twins.
Meanwhile, the Yamazaki clan was in shambles. Their leader had gone mad trying to find you, often taking his frustrations out on those around him. A trail of blood followed him, and it bleed for you. He was desperate as the months passed. He needed you, you didn’t have a choice, once he found you, you were never leaving his side again.
It was a week after you had given birth, over nine months since you ran away, that he appeared. Like you escaping through the night, his figure was a shadow, watching you, waiting. He was shocked to be greeted not only by you, but two infants as well. Exhaustion was obvious on your face, but it also held another emotion he couldn’t quite place.
“You’ve been hiding all this time, even after you discovered you were carrying my children. This game is over, it is time to return.”
He was blunt with his words, as always. He expected immediate action from you, instead, you remained seated, looking at him, that same indescribable emotion on your face. 
“I don’t think that will happen. I have served my duties as the wife by giving birth to the heir of the clan. You don’t need me anymore, and I don’t need you.”
“You don’t get a choice, you are to return and continue to be my wife”
A long pause followed. He wouldn't take no for an answer. Until...
“I’m so tired”
Your broken voice spoke. Broken things can be fixed, Shingen thought. But something stopped him, you stopped him. The two infants laying in their cots caused him to pause, if he had you, you would break further, maybe even die.
If you love something, you’ll let it go, and he might just have to do that. You were broken, and he couldn’t fix you, even if he lived in ignorance to your condition, forcing you back into the clan, by his side, it would forever plague him. 
The thought of knowing you were alive was better than keeping you by his side, forever spiraling until you faded away. He couldn’t leave without something though. 
“I will take my son with me, the daughter shows no promise for anything special, she will remain with you.”
You offered no argument as he took the child, as he was leaving you offered on final remark.
“His name is Jonggun, but please, give him a proper name. And let us forget we ever met.”
He would never know what happened to you or the daughter, and although he had your son, it was too painful to look at him. He avoided the son, again falling into a deep depression. It wasn’t until he was dying protecting the child he had taken from you, that he finally understood.
It finally clicked what that look on your face was. He hadn’t seen it since you first left, nobody having the nerve to show it in front of him. It was normally mixed with another emotion as well, but this time, it stood alone, by itself.
It was loathing.
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I can't help myself, I love writing unhappy stories. I like to try and make the prompts possible in the storyline, it's just more enjoyable for me. Careful when you say, the rest is up to you, because I will turn it into an angsty story. TBH I originally was gonna make reader die, but couldn't make it work.
All my Shingen stories have the common theme of reader dying or running away, just how I like it.
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greencreeker · 7 months ago
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byanyan · 7 months ago
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tonight's one of those nights where i'm thinking about fledgling verse again....... but this time i'm just laughing at the concept of byan being trapped with eternal babyface
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bloodyarson · 2 years ago
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not to derail but i think the reason why american english is so easy to learn and to speak for a lot of people is exactly because correct enunciation doesn't matter one bit really. as long as you make a noise that has the right vowels and kinda similar consonants people will understand what you're saying 90% of the time. and so i think, other than imperialism of course, this is one of the reasons why english is everyone in the world's "common tongue" now. even with a really thick accent english is still understandable, way more than most other majorly spoken languages. i mean, just fucking take a listen to french! or don't actually unless you want your ears to start bleeding.
so yeah in conclusion i think the reason why english is the language everyone learns and communicates in is because of this specific lack of a need to properly pronounce things, making it so much easier than most other languages for non native speakers. :)
americans be like i’m looking at myself in the meer
#this is absolutely accurate#sometimes we make fun of ourselves for this kind of terrible enunciation with my wife#i think the last one is the best really the way could you becomes coodjyu and what you becomes wotchu#it's so funny#where do the dj and tch sounds come from!! it's a d and a t!!#anyway yeah to speak english you can literally just mumble something that kinda sounds like a word and ppl will get it most of the time#also on a totally different subject i FUCKING HATE french#especially french spoken with an actual french accent#quebecois french is kinda bearable but I wouldn't say i like it#but french french makes me want to commit murder as soon as i hear someone speaking it#it sounds so fucking pretentious and dumb oh my gooood i hate it so much#i don't really know why to be honest it's a purely instinctual reaction of rage that happens when i hear it#also not only does a french french accent sound terrible the expressions they use in france are SO fucking cringe#at one of my previous jobs i had a coworker who had recently immigrated from france and listening to her was TORTURE#she would use the dumbest fucking expressions to say things everytime she did that i wanted to be struck by lightning#like she called work ''le boulot'' instead of ''le travail'' or ''la job''#NO ONE in quebec uses the word boulot!!!!#NO ONE I CAN GUARANTEE YOU THAT NO ONE CALLS IT THAT#it just sounds so fucking bad when you hear that man i dont know why i hate it so much but i do i just can't stand it#working with her was just non stop stuff like this and my ears were bleeding the entire time#and the cherry on top is that i suspect that it was that coworker specifically who went to snitch and lie about me sending rude texts#about our boss#which is why i got fired despite being good at my job and getting along with all the rest of my coworkers except that manager#who's had it out for me since the first day i stepped into the store#she spent a week deadnaming me for example when everyone else called me by my chosen name from the moment i asked them to#and she seemed to always have a problem with everything i did even when what i was doing was something i had been asked to do#by someone in a position higher than hers lmao#her favorite thing was yelling at me that i wasn't at my register whenever i dared to step further than 3 feet from it#literally she admonished me multiple times for not being at my post when i was at a distance where#i could touch the counter by simply lifting my arm and reaching for it
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a-shade-of-blue · 3 months ago
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Hi everyone. Mohammed Khalil (@ahmed0khalil) has asked me to share his story, and I’m writing on his behalf. Mohammed created the donation campaign for his little brother 6-year-old Ahmed, and he aims to raise funds to evacuate his family of 8. You can see in his blog how much he loves and worries for 6-year-old Ahmed. Mohammed is only 19 years old. This is not normal. He should have been in school, not begging for our attention to try and raise enough funds so that they can buy food, water, medicine, and a chance to evacuate to safety.
In Gaza, where the sounds of bombing blend with the cries of children, Mohammed and Ahmed's family experienced days they never imagined they would endure. Mohammed (19) and Ahmed (6) have four other siblings: Fathi, Aya, Anas and Abdullah. Aya (21) is a uni nursing student and Anas (15) is also a school student. Neither of them can study anymore with the current genocide. This war is especially hard on Fathi (23), who is blind and suffering from coronary artery disease, Abdullah (11) who is autistic and does not understand what is happening, and Ahmed (6), a small child who had barely started kindergarten before his education came to a halt.
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The destruction that struck the area left them with no place to live. The sounds of explosions fill the horizon, and the homes that once sheltered them have become piles of rubble. They suddenly found themselves outside their home, homeless.
The bombing not only destroyed their home, but also severely injured Mohammed. Mohammed was sitting at the entrance of the school his family was sheltering in when three bombs were dropped in front of him. The bombs destroyed a residential tower in front of Mohammed. Dust filled the air and the resulting rubble and shrapnel fell on Mohammed, injuring him in the leg. Mohammed was so severely wounded that he could not walk, and he had to lie there, hurt and bleeding, for 2 hours before the Palestinian Red Crescent came and carried him to the hospital.
The bombing shattered the glass in the school Mohammed and his family was staying at, but thankfully the children sustained no serious injuries. Soon after, they were asked to evacuate the school immediately as there were news that the IOF were going to bomb the Abbas prison near it. And so even though Mohammed was wounded, he could not rest and wait for his leg to heal, but had to leave again with his family.
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Now they are living in a small tent in a refugee camp. Mohammed told me that they had to bathe in polluted water and the place smelled of sewage and corpses. Camp life was difficult not only because of the scarcity of food, the infectious disease, and the polluted water, but also because of the psychological torture they endure. Looking at all the devastation, and how the world seems indifferent to their suffering, Mohammed told me that they, including young innocent 6-year-old Ahmed, had begun to lose hope for a better future.
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Internet is unstable and often lacking in the refugee camp. Mohammed is using the precious time when Internet is available to tell me his story. I hope you will not turn away their calls for help. They urgently need donations to provide for shelter, food, and medicine, as well as to evacuate out of Gaza. Donations are coming in really slowly for Mohammed’s campaign, and I beg all of you, please, don't turn a blind eye to his story. 
Mohammed’s campaign has been shared by 90-ghost and I’ve also been talking extensively with him. He is a very nice person and he just really wants to help his family survive. Please, please, help Mohammed evacuate himself, his 5 siblings and his parents! Little 6-year-old Ahmed does not deserve to live in fear of falling bombs every day, and neither does Mohammed and the rest of his family. 
Really low funds! Only €1,185 raised of €50,000 target!!
Please share/reblog and donate to help a family of 8! These are children we are talking about, and my heart breaks for what they have to endure.
Please follow Mohammed and Ahmed on @ahmed0khalil to get updates on their situation!
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shotmrmiller · 21 days ago
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getting shot down by ghost without even asking him out or anything because he'd heard from one scottish bird that your type of guy was exactly like him and thinking back on it now, all the qualities you'd listed for your dream man do sound like as if you were describing him. yikes.
you don't take his rejection to heart, even though it does lightly sting but before you get a chance to explain that said scottish bird is an idiot and very mistaken in his assumption, ghost is telling you that it'd never work, you'd only get hurt and that you do take to heart because what does that mean, exactly? does he think you some dewy eyed farm girl looking for love? that you can't have casual sex with someone without eventually wanting for more?
"tha' ain't wha' i said. you'd get hurt, i mean look at ya." what about you? it's not like you'd let any of what happens behind closed doors affect your performance or anything, you and kyle always keep things professional while in the field.
also, is he aware that he doesn't have to have a reason to not want to sleep with you, or anyone else for that matter?
"you're small," he states, as if fact.
small? small where? your irritation dissipates, shoulders bleeding tension as genuine worry begins to set in. his vision might actually be going bad. could it be the black paint he wears under his mask? is it even safe to use on the face let alone near the eyes? did he read the instructions?
but then you realize he's looking at your legs, or specifically, what's between them and things click, and now you're wondering how someone so bloody brilliant could be this fucking stupid.
"while i appreciate your concern, lieutenant," you pointedly snap, "that's not even- i'd be just fine." he's a big guy, for sure. massive, if being honest. his neck alone is easily bigger than both your hands and you've caught him once or twice having to duck his head to enter the debriefing room but him being so endowed that it poses a threat to you is idiotic at best.
he hums, long and low in his throat, as he peers down at you through heavy lidded eyes, and raises his right shoulder in a shrug. "as you like," and that's the one and only warning you got.
simon had given you as much foreplay as needed, had lapped at your pussy until you forgot what day of the week it was, curled and scissored his fingers until his bedsheets were sodden and it still hadn't been enough. he'd only fit about a fourth of it in before he took pity on you and fucked your thighs instead until he got close, pushing his ruddy tip back into your aching cunt because "spillin' outside is a waste," and sent you on your merry way.
you're no quitter though and after some shopping online, your saving grace (dilators) will be here in a week.
(now to find soap and rip the rest of his hair right out his scalp for wagging his tongue.)
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starlingskulls · 11 months ago
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also one of the cats i work with really fucked my shit up last shift and i feel very upset about it One because uhmm. rude. but also because ohhh that's deeper than i've ever gone and it didn't hurt that bad .. very interesting information
#🐦‍⬛posting#mostly just stung yk. didn't bleed too bad either#and like .. yk when the cvts look pretty or whatever LMAOO it looks Nice. like I'm so fucking pissed but good work little dude#downside is I keep looking at it like hmm...... could make more!#if anyone is reading this rn could u tell me if it's dangerous to cvt on the upper thigh. like High up the thigh#bc that's where I've been doing it but I think I remember someone being like hey. Don't Do That. like don't cvt at all but#Especially Not There#but also like goddd that's the only place I can hide it#I can't do arms I wear jackets a lot but also I wear this one shirt a lot and its like. those tiny tiny straps I forgor what they r called#and I'd simply rather die than tell anyone in my life abt this#even though their guilt Would be fun <- hate that I want it though#like I hate it BAD. makes me feel fucking evil. but god I want ppl to feel bad for making Me feel bad#but then also I'm terrified of ppl feeling responsible for my stupid actions like that yk ?#fun me lore I was on Tumblr at the ripe age of 11#in a tiny fandom#and managed to befriend this woman who I Knew would cvt and was suicidal or wtv#and ofc she didn't Know how young I was till I finally confessed at like 15 but. well that is a Lot of pressure for an 11 year old#Especially bc she'd vent like. every fucking day. I felt bad of course but that much? for like 4 years?#draining!!!!!! and if I'd so much as hint to it she'd make me feel guilty. not on purpose. but it still happened !#nowadays I feel so fucking guilty for every little thing I do lol. which is why I can't tell anyone abt this#if I ever made Anyone I love feel that same way? that's it I'm done I'm dead#so now silly and curious strangers get to read my yapping !#hiiiiiiii !
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heeliopheelia · 8 months ago
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𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐓𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐄𝐍𝐆𝐀𝐆𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐎𝐅𝐅 𝐃𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐀𝐍 𝐀𝐑𝐆𝐔𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓
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genre: hurt/comfort, angst, fluff
word count: 4.3k
warnings: cursing, crying, neglect, tiny mention of bleeding
a/n: i think i win the contest of overusing commas with this one 🤍 tbh this fic is just yapping so pls deal with me... it's good to write some proper angst again tho, i missed it :(( hope you guys like it and don't find them too repetetive!!
masterlist
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LEE HEESEUNG
It's been two weeks since you got the opportunity to take a proper look at Heeseung. And now as you do, you find it hard to recognize your fiancé who looks like he's about to collapse from exhaustion, to say the least. 
“I never asked you to mother me or worry about me so much. Stop getting into my business so much. I’m not a child, YN.”
It’s like he was blind to how hurt his words and actions were making you feel. It’s so unusual for him, so out of character and unfamiliar to you, that you can’t help but think that maybe it really is your fault for riling him up this much.
“I worry about you because I’m your fiancé and I love you, you jerk!” You scoff at his careless words and take a step back, the aching in your heart only increasing. “I only want to look after you because you clearly don't know how to do it yourself. I mean, look at yourself! You look as if you haven’t slept in a week and I know you haven’t been eating either. How can I not worry about you when all you do is neglect yourself?”
“Dunno, maybe find yourself something to keep you busy enough. You stay at home all day, do as much as nothing, no wonder you’re so damn nosy. I would be too with this much time on my hands.”
He’s so indifferent to everything you say, you try to recall where it all started going so wrong. All you did was ask whether he’s eaten at work or not, and now the two of you are snapping at each other as if you weren’t lovers, and trying not to hurt each other was a long forgotten thought by now. 
“If you’re so unhappy with our relationship – with me, maybe it’s best we take a break,” you say as you feel your throat tighten painfully. 
“Agreed. I never even wanted this marriage in the first place,” he scowls, silencing you, words rolling out of his mouth way quicker than his brain is able to process it. 
He bites his words back quickly when he watches your face dropping along with your shoulders, and fuck, you look as if you’ve given up on him right then and there. 
You walk away then, tears streaming down your face, muttering something about how ungrateful he was being, and all Heeseung could do was stand still as if plastered to the floor, in utter disbelief of his own, untrue, words.
After his cruel statement echoes through his head for the fourth time, he finally snaps out of the self pity and rushes after you to the kitchen where you’re leaned over the counter, head buried in your hands as you cry.
“Baby, I’m sorry,” he apologizes quickly. He walks up from behind you and wraps his arms around your waist, resting his forehead on your shoulder blade. “I didn’t mean it. I’m sorry for everything I said, sweetheart.”
He turns you around gently and feels his chest tighten at how fucking sad you look. He never wants to see you like this. He never wants to be the cause of this ever again.
And when he looks to the side, his throat closes and dries completely at the sight of your engagement ring laying on the counter right behind you. 
“Are you sure you didn’t mean it?” You ask, wiping the tears away with your hand pointlessly as another stream follows right after. “Things like that don’t come out of nowhere.”
“I didn’t, love, I swear I didn’t. I’m so fucking sorry,” he breathes out, pulling you closer to him by your neck again. 
Never again. Never fucking again. He keeps telling himself in his head as he lifts your hand to his lips and presses a kiss to your knuckles, just where your ring was supposed to be sitting snugly. Then he lowers it and places your palm against his chest, right above his heart, and covers your smaller hand with his.
That was too close to losing you, and himself, for that matter. Because he would never recover if you were gone from his life and all because of him. 
“Then why did you even say it?” You sob pitifully as you feel the warm tears dripping down the tip of your nose.
“I don’t know,” he shushes you gently, trying his best to not break you any further. 
You pull away once you feel calm enough, hands clutching his t-shirt. “It's not too late to call off the wedding, Seung,” you manage out breathily, raising your palm to cup his cheek. “I'd rather not take the step further than have you unhappy.”
“Darling, no.” Heeseung bends down to minimize the distance between the two of you and peppers your face with loving, warm kisses. He just wants to erase those atrocious thoughts out of your mind as quickly as possible. “Please, there's nothing I'd ever want more than to make you my wife. That was stupid of me to say. I'll never be happy if I'm not with you, my love.”
“I just don’t want to force this marriage on you. You need to want it as much as I do, otherwise it’s pointless.”
Heeseung almost chokes on air when he rushes out his answer even before you can properly finish your sentence. “I do want it. Please, you have to believe me.” 
“Really?”
Heeseung smiles at you softly as he wipes your wet cheeks with his thumbs. “Really. Scout’s honour.”
You breathe out, feeling relief, and look up at him with squinted, puffy eyes. “Sometimes I just wanna strangle you to death, Lee Heeseung.”
He chuckles lightly before pressing one last kiss to your cheek. “Aren't you just so adorable? You should add this to your wedding vows.”
“Maybe I’ll add this to your eulogy instead if you pull shit like that again.”
Heeseung clicks his tongue with a grin pulling on his lips. “Touché.”
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PARK JAY
The atmosphere in the living room is so heavy that your chest starts to hurt. You’re standing barely two steps away from the man you love the most, yet you’ve never felt more far away from him than in this moment. 
His eyes – cold but still undoubtedly full of love, drill holes in the side of your head as you turn your face away from him to try and gather your thoughts.
Arguments with Jay were rare. You always tried to work things out immediately, keeping your heads cool. But something has broken over the last month and you can’t see each other eye to eye anymore. At the very beginning of your relationship you made a promise to never go to bed angry. To never leave things unresolved. Yet now Jay’s been sleeping on the couch for the past week, and you fail to understand what the fuck has happened to the two of you. 
And you can’t help but think that, maybe, sometimes love is just not enough. 
“You’re not even trying to find the middle ground anymore. All you do is snap at me the second I come home. I’m fucking tired of it! Would it hurt to give it a rest for a day?” 
The tension is almost palpable. You hate how you can’t seem to back away from any argument but only keep hurting him instead. 
“Put effort into our relationship first, then we’ll talk,” you spit out instead, against your better judgment.
“It’s funny coming from you who’s done nothing but put a fucking distance between us!”
“This doesn’t make any sense anymore, Jay. We need some time apart,” you finally speak into the dull silence, eyes casted downwards at the floor as your hand keeps twitching, only to finally grab for your ring finger and slip the silver band off of it. You didn’t think much of your action, hell, you didn’t even process it properly. 
Well, not until you hear the shaky exhale leave Jay’s lips. 
Silently, he presses his lips together and nods his head before turning on his heel and leaving the room. You listen intently to the shuffling, then ringing of the keys and eventually the door being shut. 
A moment of silence turns into minutes of you staring at the ring on your palm with tears burning your eyes mercilessly. 
With your heart falling low to your stomach, you drop down on the couch and tug on your hair slightly, cursing yourself for acting so mindlessly. 
You wallow in self pity in the dead quiet room. The shiny ring feels so heavy and burning in your clenched fist. You take in a deep breath, then quickly slide the band back onto your finger, feeling instantly shielded with it being on its righteous place again.
And just like that, you spend the next three hours on the verge of losing your sanity. With no word from Jay. He’s left your messages unread. He’s left your calls unanswered. 
You don’t know whether he’s okay or hurt or simply gone. All that combined is enough to leave you panicked and terrified, unable to have a second of peace. 
You never meant to take it this far. This – your words and rapid actions, that will forever remain as one of your biggest regrets. You don’t like the idea that you made your other half feel like you’ve taken him for granted. Or for what’s worse, like a person that you can use for unloading your frustration on. 
There’s this throbbing pain in your chest as you realize that maybe he’s not coming back because why would he if you can’t even love him properly?
Your fingers are bleeding from how hard you’ve been picking on your cuticles. 
And then you hear the jingle of keys and soon the front door opens quietly. You know that even after all of this he’s still being careful to not wake you up. It’s killing you how he thinks you’d ever be able to get a wink of sleep without knowing he’s safe. 
You’re quick to drop your phone on the couch and shoot up on your legs, rushing over to the door and throwing yourself on Jay’s neck. 
“I was so worried about you!” You gasp out, clinging onto your fiancé desperately as tears unknowingly make their way down your cheeks. “Please, don’t ever do that again!”
“Sorry, my phone died,” he replies after a second or two, bringing his arm up to wrap around your waist and keep you close to him. 
He’s still upset but he understands where you’re coming from, knowing well that if it was you instead of him he’d probably go insane from worry. 
He can feel your heart hammering against his chest, so he lifts his hand and strokes your hair to help you calm down. But then you start crying, feeling his gentle touch even after everything you said, that was enough to push you over the edge. You clench your trembling hands on his sweater as you burst out with choked sobs, slouching against his warm and comforting body. 
“I’m sorry, ‘m sorry, ‘m sorry,” you weep into his chest like a mantra and Jay can quite literally feel his heart cracking at your miserable state. 
“It’s okay,” he whispers, hot air hitting your ear before he presses a soft kiss to its tip. “Don’t cry anymore, honey. We’re okay.”
“I don’t deserve that. I don’t deserve you,” you whimper quietly. “Please, don’t leave me.”
“Don’t say that,” he scolds you with a frown. Your whimpers twist his guts even more than your harsh words from before. “It’s not the first nor the last time we’ll have an argument. It’s not worth losing your pretty head over it, okay?” 
“I’m sorry,” you repeat one last time. “I promise I'll never take it off again. I’ll never lash out on you like that ever again too.”
Jay grabs your hand and runs his thumb over the thin silver band, the same one he was picking so carefully for weeks, and a small smile tugs on the corners of his mouth. He hates how shameful you sound. 
He’ll never tell you how the sight of you pulling your ring off your finger made him physically sick to his stomach. He can't have you feeling even worse than you already do. So instead he brings you close to him and rests his forehead on yours. 
“I’m so stupid,” you whisper quietly as you close your eyes, your heavy eyelashes letting go of another few droplets of crystal tears which Jay’s lips soak up instantly. “I don’t know what I’d do if you actually left.”
“You know me better than to think I’d let us break it off over such a petty fight.” And, yes, you do. But your lip wobbles with silent agony at the sole thought of that. “Hey,” he tries again as he presses a loving kiss to your red nose. “I’m not leaving, okay? How could I ever?” 
“I love you.”
With his thumb caressing your burning cheek so tenderly, you feel at peace again.
“I love you too,” he replies without skipping a beat. “No one can handle you as well as I do. And no one sees me for me like you do. We complete each other. We belong together.”
He kisses you silly then, until there’s no more tears left in your body and you’re barely able to breathe anymore. He kisses you until your legs give in and he swoops you up to carry you into your shared bed for the first time in what seems like forever.
He kisses you until it engraves in your mind that there’s no other person for him in this world but you.
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SIM JAKE
“Baby, I already apologized.” A groan lingers at the back of his throat but for his own sake he stifles it inside. “I don’t know what else you want me to do.”
You sit on the edge of your shared bed and clench your fingers on the silky duvet. “How about you start showing up to things we both agreed on attending to?”
He runs his hand down his face. “I know. It just slipped my mind, that’s all. You know how busy I’ve been this week.”
“This shouldn’t be my business only, though. I mean, for christ’s sake, it’s our wedding! I would really appreciate it if you participated in something for once!”
Flowers and cake. That’s literally all you’ve asked of him to go and pick with you for the wedding reception. Knowing his tight schedule, you picked the date carefully so that it wouldn’t meddle with his work and you could even go grab some dinner afterwards. But your plans all went out the window when he didn’t even bother showing up or giving you a heads up text, standing you up yet another time when it comes to your wedding preparations.
You’re honestly getting tired of it.
“I’ll be there next time,” he assures you quickly as he nervously taps his fingers on the doorway of your bedroom. 
“You said you wouldn’t do that,” your voice wavers as your shoulders drop with resignation. With the back of your hand, you wipe off the tears that made their way down your cheeks. “You promised to help, Jake. But you left me alone with everything, as usual.”
“It’s not even that big of a deal. This can be rescheduled any time. Baby, stop stressin’ so much.”
“But it is a big deal to me!” You cry out, palm reaching up to pinch the bridge of your nose. You breathe out heavily. “I don’t want to do everything by myself! We’re supposed to be in this together! If getting married means that I’m gonna be alone with all the responsibilities that you don’t consider important enough, I’m not even sure I still want it.”
To back up your words, your hand moves half-consciously to your ring finger and you twist the cool piece of jewelry in between your fingers. 
“No, no, no, no.” Jake moves quickly, nearly tripping over himself as he rushes towards you to desperately clasp your hand in his two and stop you from whatever the hell you were about to do. He drops to his knees in front of the bed, right at your feet. “Baby, you promised you’d never take it off.”
You’re at a loss of words as you look into his wide eyes, the seriousness of your actions only catching up to you now. You gasp quietly, eyes watering just like his, quickly relaxing your tensed hand in his and letting him slide the ring back down your finger, just where it belongs.
Silence envelopes the two of you, besides the sound of your sniffles. 
You feel awful. 
Jake feels even worse. 
Leaning forward, you press your face to his shoulder and melt instantly when he brings a hand to caress your hair. 
“I'm sorry,” you whisper, clenching your hand to feel the cool ring against your skin. “I don't know why I did that. I didn't mean to.”
“I know,” he soothes you just as softly. He stands up from the floor and carefully maneuvers the two of you so that you’re placed on his lap as he sits with his back against the headboard. “It's my fault. I'm sorry. I never meant to disregard your feelings like that.”
At the end of the day, both of you would rather set themselves ablaze than watch the other one hurting. 
You nod silently, heart pounding in your chest before you bring your arms up and throw them over his neck.
“I’m sorry I was so impulsive.”
“No. You did nothing wrong.” His soothing voice carries over the room, enveloping you with warmth. “I promise I'll be here whenever you want me to from now on. I don’t want you to feel neglected by me, especially now when you’re this stressed over the wedding. I won’t let you down, again.” 
“I just need a little help, that’s all,” you mumble tiredly into his skin.
“I know.” His warm lips press to your forehead lovingly. “I’m sorry for being an insensitive douche. It won’t happen again. I’ll take some days off next week, hm?”
The tears on your face dry slowly as your hold on him tightens. “I’d like that a lot.”
“Then it’s done. I'll be all yours and you’ll be all mine then,” he hums and noses at your cheek, finally bringing out a small giggle out of you. After all these years, he still melts at the sound. “I won’t let things get this out of hand again, YN. I promise.”
“Okay,” you whisper. Tilting your head up and bringing his down towards you, you join your lips in a kiss that you’ve been longing for for days. His movements are slow and careful as he tries to soak up as much of the moment as possible. 
His kisses slowly put your broken pieces back together. He never knew how much seeing you cry like this would hurt him. And he’ll make damn sure he won’t ever have to experience that again for as long as you're with him.
“If I have a life to spend, it'll only be with you, sweetheart,” he lowers his voice to match yours, cradling your cheek in the palm of his hand. “You're it for me. I'll never give you a chance to doubt that ever again.”
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PARK SUNGHOON
“You’re never home! There’s always a hundred things more important to you than spending an hour of your time with me. Your fucking fiance! Are we really about to get married when you’re clearly so tired of me already?”
Your heart pounds in your chest as you finally voice out everything that’s been sitting on your chest for the past month. Things have not been working out well with the two of you, much to your despair. He’s been neglectful, always too busy to help you with anything – even the wedding related things that you should’ve gotten done weeks ago. 
And you know that he��s swamped with work and it's not his fault. You understand everything. But to ask him to spare you an hour or two of his day shouldn’t be too much. It shouldn’t make him snap at you unlike what he just did the second he came back home. You slowly begin to lose your hope.
“God, have you always been this needy? Why can’t you accept that I can’t always put you first? No matter how much I’d want to, sometimes I just can’t! Deal with this!”
“Fucking- Fine.”
Your hand moves quicker than your brain, and the next thing you know, your shiny ring is being pulled off your finger and resting in the palm of your other hand. 
You can see the disbelief flashing through his face briefly before it completely morphs into a scowl. 
“You really think that this will solve the problem?” He asks, eyebrows narrowed as he glowers at you from across the room. “Really? Does that ring mean so little to you that you go and throw it away with any minor inconvenience?” 
You try to blink away the frustrated tears, hand raking up to brush your hair away from your face. “No, fuck, I just- I don’t know what to do anymore, Sunghoon. I feel like I’m the only one in this relationship. I need you to give me something more because whatever you’re doing now is not enough for me.”
“Well, I’m putting out everything I have, YN! I love you! If that’s still not good enough for you, then maybe it’s not meant to be.”
The silence that falls in the room doesn’t last long as your sudden sob pierces Sunghoon’s ears quickly, making his stomach drop to the soles of his feet. His heart wrenches and twists as the anger simmers down and evaporates from his body within a second, and he’s quickly coming back to his senses at the sight of you breaking down right in front of him. 
“Can’t you just try?” You cry into your hands, shielding your face away from your fiance. “That’s all I’m asking of you. Is it really so hard to try?”
No, it’s not. Sunghoon knows it without a second of thinking. It’s not too hard to try, never if it’s for you. And his throat dries so quickly when he basks in the weight of his words that finally made you break as well. 
“You don’t know how much it hurts to feel like you’re too much for your partner,” you wail with a small voice, shoulders trembling and hands quickly getting damp with tears. “You’ll never know how it is to feel unwanted, because you’ll never have to when you're with me. Because I love you, asshole, but now I’m doubting if you’re saying it back just for the sake of it.”
With air getting stuck in his throat, Sunghoon looks at you wide-eyed before quickly crossing the living room and enveloping you in his arms. His warmth wraps around you in what you've always considered to be safety, but now it just makes you cry more. 
He finds it hard to breathe. The hesitation in your eyes feels like a stab to his chest.
“Of course I still love you,” he says, voice muffled by your hair. 
He hates how he made you feel the opposite. He hates how you’re right and he never had to worry about any reassurement of such kind from your side because you’re just that good to him. And his heart breaks with the realization of how much of a lousy partner he’s been to you when all you ever were was nothing less than perfect.
So he places his hand on the back of your head and presses you even closer to his shoulder as you cry, his own eyes burning with tears at the sound of your sobs and sniffles. 
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, my darling,” he apologizes with a heavy heart, fearful of what’s about to come next. “I didn’t mean to neglect you this much. I could say that I’m tired and the work has been a lot lately, but I know these excuses are not enough to make up for my actions.”
You’re mad and hurt, but you love him and would never want to give up on him, so you wrap your arms around his middle and hold him almost as tight as he holds you, burying your wet face in his chest. 
“I love you more than anything, YN.” He pulls away from you only to cup your face and make you look at him. His long fingers wipe away the tears with gentle touch, soothing your stinging skin instantly. “You could never be too much for me. I want all of you. I promise I’ll do better. I’ll love you better.”
And when you’re looking up at him with these shiny eyes of yours, he closes the distance and presses a loving kiss to your swollen lips, hoping to take at least some of the pain away. He doesn’t think he can hold you any tighter. He can’t love you any stronger than right now, and it messes with his head how easily he could’ve had it all ruined only minutes ago. 
He’ll never take your love for granted ever again. Because if he did, he’d never be able to pick up the parts of whatever was left of him, and put himself back together ever again. 
You can feel his warm hand opening your closed palm before he takes the ring you've been clutching so tightly and holds it in between his fingers. 
“Can I put it back on, baby? Please.”
You nod wordlessly while you try to tame your tears. You hold your slightly trembling hand up to him. He takes it, gently, and watches as your bottom lip wobbles while he slides the ring on your finger just like he did months ago. 
“I'll never screw up like that again. You have my word for it.”
You sniffle quietly when he kisses you right on the cool band adorning your skin. “You better not, Park Sunghoon.”
His long fingers caress your cheek, wiping the remains of the tears away. “Can you forgive me, darling?”
You don't need to think long of an answer. “You know I can never stay mad at you. Even if you're a idiot, I'll never stop loving you. You have my whole heart, Hoon. Please, don't ever make me regret trusting you with it.”
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amazinglyashy · 26 days ago
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Hi hi I just found your blog like an hour ago and I’ve been scrolling and am obsessed with the way you write for the l&ds!! ❤️❤️ if you don’t mind I love a little angst and was wondering if you could write the boys reacting to MC showing up at their doorstep heavily injured from like a fight with a wanderer.
Oh my gosh thank you!!! And I don't mind at all, my friends make fun of me for how much I enjoy hurt/comfort and angst :'D Thank you for the request!
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LaDS men react to you appearing on their doorstep, injured and bleeding
Xavier -
If you end up at his door, it's more than likely because your unconscious decided to hit the button for his floor rather than your own. You just wanted to get home, not bother anyone, but he's stood right there. Having just come home from grabbing a late night snack from a nearby convenience store, you stumbled out of the elevator right as he's unlocking his front door.
He drops his keys and his bag.
It's a good thing too, because your legs gave out right then, so it's much better for him to catch you if his arms are free.
He's calling your name, and while you're still conscious, you're not really processing anything anymore. You're in too much shock, and you've lost too much blood by now.
He'll get the door unlocked and rush you inside his apartment, setting you down on his couch as he runs for a first aid kit, calling the association for emergency services while he does so.
"You're going to be okay. I promise. Just continue to breathe, alright?"
Xavier doesn't know if he's saying that to comfort you or himself, but he also isn't stopping to think about it, as he rapidly administers first aid to your wounds to at least slow the bleeding until help can arrive.
It's three in the morning but he's wide awake sitting next to your bed at the hospital, something unnatural for someone so sleep deprived usually.
He can't bring himself to shut his eyes though.
It's not work the risk.
Not until you wake up first.
Zayne -
It's like his brain splits into two the moment that he sees you standing there.
One side is his medical knowledge rushing forward as he moves to catch you as your feet stumble beneath you, trying to impossibly assess the extent of the damage before even getting to see it all. It's the half that's taking you to his kitchen table, because it's the easiest workspace for him right now. The one that's pulling out his doctor's bag from the closet in the hall, and the first aid kit from the cupboard in the kitchen as he cuts your shirt open.
The other side?
Oh honey, his heart is breaking.
If you think there's a day at work where he doesn't pray to any existent or nonexistent god that he doesn't see you today, spread out on a gurney or operating table without warning due to your unconscious state, then you'd be painfully wrong.
It's amazing how well he works while panicking on the inside, his skilled hands patching your wounds after meticulous sterilization, any sutures needed placed perfectly even through your pained groans tugging at his heart.
He knows he needs to get you to the hospital, even though he's taken good care of you in his own home. But he needs to sink to the floor for a minute, his back dragging against the wall as he heaves a deep sigh. It's a heavy toll feeling the stick of the dried blood on his hands- your blood on his hands.
With all his knowledge, he knows you'll be okay. He knows he himself will be okay. But right now-
He's not.
Sylus -
The N109 zone is beyond dangerous, mostly due to the criminals and leeches lurking in the dark shadows, but there's also no shortage of Wanderers, including ones that have been genetically altered to be even worse than they normally were.
So when Sylus sees you stumbling at his doorstep, bloodied hand reaching for the knob as he glances at the camera feed, he's not sure he could say he's ever moved so fast in his life otherwise. "Sweetie-" He breathes, as he catches you, scooping you up and rushing you inside as quickly as he possibly can without aggravating your already extensive injuries.
Luke is already running for first aid, and Kieran is already contacting the doctor. Mephisto is shrieking in the hall as he follows Sylus to his bedroom, protesting the fact that Sylus had needed him for surveillance of a target today instead of watching you.
Sylus knows.
He knows this is his fault.
If he had had someone keeping an eye on you, this wouldn't have happened.
His eyes are glued to your barely conscious form in his arms, the guilt in the recesses of his heart digging deeper with every slather of red that painted your skin.
Sorry to say, you're going to have your work cut out for you when you wake up. It's going to take a lot of heavy lifting on your part to convince him that he's not at fault for what happened to you.
And you will be waking up.
Sylus will make sure of that.
Rafayel -
Don't make his nightmares a reality.
Not again.
He's catching you before you can even begin to sway, and he'll be lucky if he remembers to shut the door behind him, his body melding against yours as he picks you up and runs down to his car.
"No, no no no. You stay awake, cutie."
He's definitely breaking at least a dozen laws just trying to get you to Akso hospital as quickly as he can. His mind is racing as fast as his car is moving down the streets, wondering what could have happened to you, what he should be doing right now, if he should have administered first aid to you before taking off-
But he's there so fast, it would have been nearly identical on the clock regardless of him still choosing to rush you to the hospital, or run to get and administer first aid for you from within his home.
He's there until you wake up- wide awake no matter how long it takes. It could be minutes, hours, days- he can't sleep. The image of you dying before him- the image of you standing on his doorstep as well- etched on the back of his eyelids every time he tried to close his eyes.
He talks to you even when you're not awake, stroking your hand, your cheek, the side of your neck- trying to make sure you're as comfortable as he can make you.
When you wake up again, he has to hold himself back with everything in him from squeezing you too tightly. He doesn't want to burst your stitches or harm you, but his body and arms are all-encompassing on you as he hugs you firmly, his face buried in the crook of your neck.
He really doesn't need you to see him cry.
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nutelloona · 1 year ago
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some nights I really wish my front door wasn't so fucking loud to open/close bc as much as I feel trapped and suffocated in my room on night like these, - and in my house in general, tiny apartments and all that crap that capitalism keeps blessing us with - dealing with questions or concern from my siblings is one of the most unbearable consequences I can picture
#I just know I won't be able to sleep tonight#as I also know that driving around the city wouldn't actually make anything better#there's the gas prices and the general street violence that also make those night drivings not as relaxing as they should be#but even if ignore all of that for a moment#I know damn well where would I end up driving to#bc my fanfic writer driven brain can't have normal coping mechanisms or develop reasonable ways to deal with conflict#every fucking problem I have has a dramatic ass speech ready for it with entire scenes and contexts that fuel the drama even more#no one deals with shit like that this ain't the final 20 minutes of a coming of age movie#my shit won't go away after a long emotional confession of mistakes and full on vulnerability#bc the person I'd make listen to it wasn't written by me and their reaction wouldn't be anything close from what I'd expect to hear#what I'd want to hear#tbh at this point I'm not even sure what I wanna hear from her#maybe I just want to hear ANYTHING from her that isn't this deafening silence that she decided it was enough to show how she felt#maybe I just don't wanna feel like I'm a huge joke for going through all of this by myself while she has no idea of any of this#there's just too much that I don't know where to put bc it should all go to her#I feel like I already did everything I could to make her acknowledge my feelings my hopes my needs my mistakes my whole fucking existence#but she chose to walk as far away as possible at the sight of all of that#I could type until my fingers bleed and shout until my throat exploded in flames but she still wouldn't listen#I wasn't even worth a reaction to her and it kills me every single day#there's no point in any of this rant and I know that#but it's all I have left#this is it
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wrioluvr · 10 months ago
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『shhh, not so loud! make me. huh?』 slutty sub yandere x gentle himbo darling, male yandere x male reader
note: thank u all the support on pt 1 ♡♡ was thinking about a scenario where slutty yandere somehow manages to convince his darling to actually fuck him after a lot of begging... even tho reader is scared his large cock will break him apart <3 pt 1
cw: he/him pronouns for reader, mentions of reader's ex-boyfriends, loss of yandere's virginity, implied violence
nervous was the way you were feeling as you made your way to your boyfriend's house. the two of you had started dating a few weeks ago, when after you'd let him suck your dick, he broke down crying, admitted to how desperately he was in love with you, and pleaded on his knees for you to own him and treat him as your personal fucktoy. frantically, you quickly assured him you would treat him as an equal in the relationship, to his slight disappointment. of course, he was ecstatic that you'd agreed to be his boyfriend, but you were his god, how could he not worship such a kind being? in your eyes, despite his rather.... overly submissive behaviour, he was kinda cute, so why not give it a go? if only you knew how deep his obsession truly ran...
and with an progression in your relationship, came a progression in intimacy level as well. the previous day, he had gathered up the courage to ask you to top him, which is why you were making your way to his apartment now. the current fear you were feeling was not for yourself, but for him, you worried that he would hurt himself trying to bottom. you were aware you were bigger than most guys... you wondered how to tell him you weren't too sure about the whole anal thing after all.
but what you did not expect to see the moment you opened the door to his room, was him on his bed on all fours, ass up, using his index and middle finger to spread his tight pink hole towards you. he turned his head around at the sound of your arrival and looked back at you with lust-filled, half-lidded eyes, breathing heavily. "baby! thank god you're finally here... please fuck me already, i've been waiting for hourssss......." his words came out in a pitiful whine.
your eyes widen at his plea. "woah, okay, let's slow down." quickly, you make him sit up, much to his confusion. he was already ready, so why were you hesitant?
taking his hand and squeezing it gently, you tell him what's on your mind. "okay, uh... i'm not too sure if i want to fuck you right now..."
"wha- but- but why? you promised!"
"i know i did, but i'm worried for you. i know i'm kinda... big, so i don't want to make you bleed or anything..."
at your reasoning, he can't help but whine in frustration. don't you understand? he doesn't care about how much it hurts! he wants it to hurt! his one wish is for you to completely destroy him! usually he'd back down, since he doesn't want to make you uncomfortable with his desperation, but he decided to be a little selfish.
reaching over and fondling your crotch, he looked at you with a silent, horny plea in his eyes, then proceeded to sit in your lap and grind on your bulge sensually. he whimpered as your clothed dick got harder and prodded at his hole.
taken back by his sudden boldness, you let him straddle you. "hey... did you even listen to anything i said?"
"forgive me, darling. but i want this so bad. give it to me, pretty please?" he continues to roll his hips on your crotch, not sounding terribly sorry at all.
you sigh, realising you can't change his mind. "okay, just let me know if it hurts, and i'll stop immediately. alright?"
"mhm." but secretly, he'd moan in pleasure no matter how painful it was, relishing in it.
"at least let me prepare you first...?"
"i've been fingering myself for the past hour, you don't need to." he giggled, as he got back down on all fours on his bed, hoping you were proud of his forward thinking. "i want our first time to be special, so i'm fully prepared."
"wait... you're a virgin?" upon hearing your question, he turned his head back to look at you with an incredulous expression on his pretty face, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
"but of course, i've been saving myself for you. i don't want anyone else using me." he bit his lip, making sure you knew how much he valued you taking his virginity. he suddenly realised how he'd completely forgotten to ask (or stalk to find out) about your past relationships. "what about you, darling? are you a virgin?" secretly, he was hoping the answer would be yes, but deep down he knew you were far too desirable for that to be true.
"nah. i dated a few guys before, but they broke up with me because they said i was too dumb." you'd never really thought about it deeply, but saying it out loud made you realise that it was rather embarrassing...
"how the fuck could they say that? you're so perfect and kind... forget about them, darling... just focus on me. you won't need to think about those ungrateful whores ever again." his change in tone caught you off guard, grip tightening around your arm. this was the first time he'd ever sounded genuinely pissed off. but this was quickly masked by his usual lovesick smile as he resolved to make you feel so good, your attention would forever be on him and him only.
eagerly, he helped you undress and tried not to blush at the sight of your naked body, even as he relished in the sight of the cock he had gotten on his knees for so many times before. you were confused at his reaction. "we're both guys, why are you embarrassed?" you were so silly sometimes. he was finally going to be made your bitch, of course he would be flustered!
with your cock teasing his entrance, he made his final invitation. "i want you to mess me up inside." he begged as he spread his virgin hole open, groaning in pain and pleasure as you pushed halfway into him. immediately, you looked up to his face in concern. "you okay? it's only halfway in..." "fuck, i said i can take it!" with that, he pushed himself onto your cock with a lewd determination, letting out an overly passionate moan as you fully entered him. instinctively, you shushed him, not wanting the neighbours to hear. "shhh! you're being too loud....." "make me." he retorts defiantly, trying to rile you up so you would be rougher. "huh?" fuck, he was really pushing it today. you really didn't want to, but he was making far too much noise. resorting to muting him forcefully, you reach for his mouth and clamp your hands over it, effectively gagging him. his eyes widen, not expecting you to take the bait, but he's in heaven. you can practically see the hearts in his eyes as he sluttily sucks on your fingers, all that's left is a series of muffled whimpers.
even though your mind was currently preoccupied with the way your boyfriend's squeezing your cock, you can't help but think about your exes after he brought the topic up. you knew you were a little dumber than most, but did all those guys really break up with you just because you were stupid? he seemed to sense your feelings and clenched harder, making you lose focus and grip his hips tightly. the thought of you thinking about your exes while you were inside him was horrible, he couldn't have that at all! "s-see, darling, my ass is much better than those sluts, isn't it- uuummfff." he could barely form words as he continued to ride you up and down, savouring the way your large length stretched his inner walls to their limit. it was quite the stark contrast - you were thrusting in and out of him at a tender pace, making sure you were never too rough (feeling a little guilty for muffling him so forcefully just now), but yet he was whimpering and writhing all over the bed, gripping the sheets whenever you hit his prostrate at regular intervals. he desperately tried to fuck himself on your cock when you slowed down, noticing his tears, begging you to start again. after a bit, you felt like you were about to reach your climax. "hey, i'm about to co-" "do it inside me." you didn't have time to argue as he pulled you closer into a hug, making you cum inside him, much to his delight. he adored the way you filled him up, feeling you pump load after load into his hole. he rubbed his stomach, wishing he could get pregnant with your child. but alas, he can't have everything. today was already a huge victory. exhausted, he collapsed into your arms as you stroked his hair, apologising for being a little rough and hoping his ass didn't hurt too much. he couldn't really focus on what you were saying as he just lay there and stared up at you affectionately. god, you were just perfect, weren't you?
˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗
in the middle of night, as you slept peacefully, the boy you fucked a few hours ago had just finished going through your phone, his one objective being obtaining the names of your exes. "don't worry, darling.... i'll take care of those unappreciative bastards myself. no one gets to make you feel stupid." he whispers to your ear lovingly before getting out of bed. he hoped you wouldn't be too mad when you found out he killed them when you woke up. or maybe he did, just so you could punish him. ♡
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nightprompts · 1 year ago
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&. 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.
(  happy sunday! here's another assortment of smut / nsfw dialogue prompts but with more explicit language. a dirtier sequel to my other, more subtle, smut prompt list. please do not interact if you are under eighteen. )
❛ you can't expect me to do all the work. i want to see what that pretty mouth of yours can do. ❜
❛ you're mine, and i take care of what belongs to me. ❜
❛ i want to fuck you so badly. ❜
❛ i want you to fuck me so badly. ❜
❛ do you really think you’re in a position to give orders? ❜
❛ please. make me feel good. no one else can like you. ❜
❛ you can call me whatever you want, baby. ❜
❛ be good, and i'll fuck you / let you fuck me. ❜
❛ we're going to fuck right here? what if someone sees us? ❜
❛ that really does make you hard. i can feel you pulsing inside me. ❜
❛ do whatever you want with me, i'm yours. ❜
❛ your body was made for mine. ❜
❛ you keep your hands where they are or i'll tie them up. ❜
❛ you want gentle? wrong fucking address. ❜
❛ have a little trust in yourself, i know you can take it. ❜
❛ it's my thigh or nothing. i'm not helping you get off. ❜
❛ i'm waiting for your permission to let me have my way with you. ❜
❛ i don't care if someone sees us. i need you, now. ❜
❛ i can see you enjoy having the upper hand for once. ❜
❛ you're such a fucking tease, you know that? ❜
❛ let me come in you, please. i want to fill you up. ❜
❛ come in me. i need you to fill me up. ❜
❛ now, i'll ask again, are you going to be good for me? ❜
❛ we both know how much you're going to enjoy this. ❜
❛ i'm sorry, what was that? i can’t hear you over all that noise you’re making. ❜
❛ you can take my clothes off for me. ❜
❛ begging is a good look for you. ❜
❛ i'll take good care of you, i promise. ❜
❛ i'd say you need someone to put you in your place. ❜
❛ so good for me. look how much you came. ❜
❛ i can take care of you. you won't need anyone but me. ❜
❛ it made them hard to see me bleed. just like it's making you hard. ❜
❛ you're mine. you've always been mine. ❜
❛ i want to see how pretty you look with your lips around my dick / strap. ❜
❛ i'm simply enjoying the view. it's not every day i get to fuck someone so pretty. ❜
❛ you're so good for me, so fucking good around me, fucking made for me. ❜
❛ you came so fast, i barely even touched you. ❜
❛ do what you want, but you'd better make it good or i'll kill you. ❜
❛ as much as i'd love to have you choking on me, i'm impatient and there's something else i want more. ❜
❛ missed my touch that much, did you? ❜
❛ someone's needy. ❜
❛ you taste like heaven. ❜
❛ i need to come. please, i'll do anything. ❜
❛ i'm going to put that mouth of yours to good use. ❜
❛ you're fucking gorgeous like that, spread out like a good boy / girl who just wants to be eaten. ❜
❛ you'll be begging for me by the time i'm through with you. ❜
❛ let me stay like this in you for a little bit. ❜
❛ look at that pretty expression. i always knew you could make one. ❜
❛ was it good for you too? it's never been like that before. you've never been like this before. ❜
❛ is that how you usually get out of these situations? by fucking your way out of them? ❜
❛ i love that no one else has seen you like this, that no one else has felt you before, been inside you. they don't get to have you, but i do. ❜
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rose-bookblood · 1 year ago
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Between the 11th and 12th of this month, Giulia Cecchettin, a 22-year-old Italian girl, disappeared alongside her ex boyfriend, Filippo Turetta. Today, 18th November, her body was found in a lake 140km from where I live.
For six days, we were told that they ran away together, despite the fact Giulia was supposed to graduate from university on the 16th. That we shouldn't jump to conclusions, that there wasn't any proof he had killed her, that we were crazy for even thinking it. When a video of him beating Giulia up until she was bleeding came out, newspapers were filled with declarations from his family saying he loved her, he would never do anything to hurt her, he was just a little possessive and jealous.
We all knew. We all fucking knew since we read the words "ex boyfriend".
Giulia is the 103rd woman victim of feminicide in Italy in 2023. 103.
Meanwhile, Giulia's sister Elena, who has had to spend the last week making as much noise as possible because that was her only hope of finding her sister, was asked if the family was ready to forgive him. Newspapers talk about how good of a guy he was, they carefully avoid saying he murdered her, they refer to them as a couple. I've lost track of how many men have taken time to comment "not all men" under posts about Giulia.
Not all men, but all women.
If you live outside of Italy, you probably won't hear of this news. You probably don't know how pervasive victim blaming is in Italian news stations, how bad the statistics of feminicide are. So, please, reblog this post. Demand justice. Say Giulia Cecchettin's name.
Se domani non torno, distruggi tutto.
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signedkoko · 10 months ago
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Could I get a Mammon, Vox and Husk with a S/O who gets harassed on the street and their reaction? You can have full creative control over what type of harassment!
I love your fics- if this isn’t getting the creative juices flowing just let me know and I’ll request something different <3
🦷 anon
Husk | Mammon | Vox [Romantic]
In which some loathsome idiot thinks they'll get away with harassing their beloved s/o.
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One of your favourite date nights is spent bar hopping
Pop a drink or two in each one, sometimes sharing one cocktail, his wing draped around you, your head leant on his shoulder, humming to the music surrounding you
Both of you had a preference for the less popular spots, the kinds of places you got the weirdest combinations, where he could be inspired and you could give him thoughts
The plus side of the smaller joints was that the music was never too loud, drinks were cheaper, and there was always a few spots free at the bar
Downside was that most places had their regulars, the kind of people who couldn't get in anywhere else
The kind of desperation that builds and spreads like mold in the corner of a dark room next to a leaky pipe
On a few occasions, someone would harmlessly ask to buy you a drink and would turn tail when Husk gave them his usually 'fuck off' look
But this time, the guy would just not get the hint
" What? Already claimed dibs on the bitch? "
Yeah- no, that attitude towards you is not going to fly
Not even three seconds and there's a bottle smashed on the drunk demons head, and three cards flying back into Husk's hand
That's when the bleeding starts
You slap a 20 down for your bill and jump straight up, already being dragged by Husk out the door
Insists if he stayed there you would have both gotten banned anyways, and he likes that spot
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You guys don't really go out so casually without a good reason, or just for old times sake
A sin and his spouse on a city street in greed was just asking for bad things to happen
But still, if you asked and he had nothing that day, Mammon would always rather get quality time with you and people watch
Thats most of your conversation, pointing out demons and joking about what you think they are like, what the do, how they speak
It's always a fun game, until some newcomer saw you laughing at him and marched right up, clearly on something and clearly ready to have a go at someone
The moment he reaches for your wrist, his thumb falls to the floor, a messy and jagged cut the only sign of attack besides one of Mammons spider legs now revealed
Before he can even realize the pain or what's happened, Mammon lets out a menacing laugh
" Every extra inch towards my broad is another finger. "
That demon was already screaming and running away, most the crowd on the street that was watching now hurrying in any direction opposite of you and Mammon
" I'm only worth one finger? "
" Nah. Just being generous for once. "
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Not really a street guy, but unfortunately some press conferences and events require mingling and interacting with others, which he never liked
Thankfully, with you he has an excuse to stay away from others, or show you off
He usually goes for the latter
He's all 'Have you met my wife?' 'My wife loves x and y!' 'Isn't my wife absolutely gorgeous?'
You are the first topic he speaks of after his company; you'd be the first if he didn't have to waste so much time being a salesman, but that is how the cookie crumbles
Sometimes when there's specific press releases, he has to send you off for a moment, where you usually go and mingle with some of the others in his industry you befriended
During one such interview, he couldn't help but spot out the corner of his eye, some lousy business woman drape her arm around your waist and grab at your hip
" Sorry yeah, this interview is over. "
Literally shoves his way over, sparks and electricity flying, to rip you out of her arms
" Baaabe, is this a friend? Whatever the case, we really gotta get going! "
Jealousy 3000
He's glad he stepped in after he overhears that lady had a habit of harassing other attendees
New clause in every interview; they have to include you or provide security over you while he is busy
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Author's Note - Tooth anon comes in for another PIPIN HOT request!! I actually feel so bad because every time I take a break form writing is on yoru request and that really makes it look bad I am so sorry 😩
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synqiri · 4 months ago
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"SAY CHEESE ! "
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or, his favourite photo of you.
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PAIRING: aventurine, dan heng x gn!reader
WARNINGS: none
WORDCOUNT: 0.6K || CONTENT: fluff, slice of life, kisses!!!
NOTES: something silly for the sillies
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AVENTURINE awakens to tangled sheets, and your limbs sprawled over his.
your embrace is warmer than the sunlight that filters in through the curtains, your soft breaths ghosting over his neck from where your head is cosily tucked in. he smiles, a touch fondly. a muffled grumble leaves your lips as he twists out of your hold. 
he grabs his phone from his nightstand, snapping a photo of the scene easily. he’d use it to tease you later, when you are awake.
you were so incredibly worried during the entirety of the last night, after he had initially offered to let you sleep over. yet here you are now, spread across his bed as if it were your very own.
“are you sure?” you had asked, with drawn brows and pursed lips. “it's really okay, i can get home just fine.”
he only laughed, head cocked to the side, a smirk tugging at his lips. “careful now, love, or i might just get the impression you don't want to stay at all.”
“i do,” you protest. your expression softens, and you raise a hand, reaching for him, only to drop it midway. “really, i do. i'm just scared that sleeping over is too… we promised to take things slow.”
“well then, we must have different definitions of ‘slow’, darling. how could ever i let my little lucky charm travel home by themselves this late into the night?”
you sigh, your body sagging into the couch, and he knows he's won. it’s thrilling. he leans in, dipping his head, pressing a kiss to your temple which you do not refuse. instead, you giggle, meeting him halfway. 
“fine,” you say. “i’ll stay the night. just this once.”
in the end, you begin to stay over for many, many nights more, and the photo he had taken that first morning is never brought up to you at all.
… until the day you notice his phone's wallpaper.
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“DAN HENG!” you call, barrelling into the archives and straight into him.
he barely has the time to look at you before you sling an arm around his shoulder, pulling him close. you hold march's camera up high.
“say cheese!”
you turn to him, pressing a big, fat kiss to his cheek, and the shutter goes off with a snap.
when you release him from your hold, he huffs. “what was that all about?”
“march let me borrow her camera,” you tell him, grinning, bright and delighted and childishly gleeful. he can guess as much. he nods anyway, so you continue. “let's take another one!”
he sighs, and you cackle.
“did you even try to smile?” you complain, shuffling through the polaroid photos. there are at least ten different pieces in your hand, and many more takes you didn't print out. “awh, this one's cute.”
“i did,” he defends himself. smiling came as naturally to you as did breathing, but that simply wasn't the case for him. he gestures at one of the photos discarded on the bed, near your feet. “i smiled in that one.”
you pick it up to inspect. “awh.”
when you are done sifting through the photos, you leave him all the ones you do not want.
“you can do whatever with the rest,” you tell him cheerily. “i have to go and return march her camera now.”
then, you're bounding out of the room as quickly as you had come.
he picks up the photo closest to him, and realises it is the first one you had taken. his eyes are slightly wide with surprised, his head partially turned to you. your joy is wide and infectious, bleeding through the film so easily it makes him smile. though your face is half hidden behind his cheek, he can see the crinkles in your eye and your endearingly silly grin.
the lighting is off, and the picture itself is blurry, but he finds he loves it all the same.
he slips it into his drawer for safekeeping.
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