#and either stop reading

[techmomma]

There is a degree to which we are responsible for our emotions. And certainly, we are responsible for our reactions and behavior.

In situations that we have control, situations where a friend is hurting us, like yes, maybe they shouldn't be hurting you. But there are also actions you have to take on your part.

Think of it like an ocean wave. If you go to the beach and a wave surprises you and gets you wet, and you're upset by this, that is perfectly reasonable.

If you keep standing there, letting yourself get wet and get more upset, when you can move away, then that's on you. I mean, it's your choice to do so. If you don't like getting wet and you just stand there getting wet when you can take a few steps back, you can do so. But it's also unnecessary stress, and you give up your own agency. Saying "I can't control this" when there are very much parts you can control denies your own responsibility in this situation. You can't control the waves from crashing, but you can step away from them.

If you know that a friend is going to keep disappointing you, there are two different actions we can take here: a proactive, and a reactive action.

A reactive action looks like knowing they're going to disappoint you or upset you, they do so, and you react to this. Nothing changes, and it keeps happening, and you continue to be upset. Your anxieties remain unaddressed and continue to hurt you.

A proactive action looks like knowing they're going to disappoint you or upset you and taking the steps to mitigate stress in anticipation of this. And THAT can look like setting down a boundary, removing yourself from the situation (no longer participating in the thing that your friend disappoints you about or no longer asking them to do X when they won't), or accepting that they will disappoint you--meaning you are at peace with the idea of them disappointing you, not "I am going to continue letting them disappoint me but it's going to upset me every time."

It means addressing the source of your stress and what upsets you before it actually does. And like. That's hard! It fucking sucks!

Especially for those of us who've grown up in situations where we didn't have any choice but to be reactive, because oh I don't know, we were children and didn't have any other options. And now we've grown up into adults who feel like there's no other option but to sit there and take it. Like there's no other choice but to be stressed and upset.

Part of healing from this kind of abuse, managing our stress in proactive, responsible ways means we no longer settle anymore, for being hurt. "Just taking it" when people hurt us and won't change. And as adults, that is kind of our responsibility and no one else can really do that for you. That's kind of part of being emotionally mature, is understanding yourself, and being responsible with your own emotions.

We sometimes can't change what other people will do. But we can change what we do, in response. And we can take care of our stressors before they stress us out.

[watchingwisteria]

listen there really was just something about how in the book, snow’s 3-page descent from hesitant lover boy to deluded mfer happens entirely in his mind. lucy gray gives him no indication whatsoever that she suspects him, that she’s going to leave or betray him. he’s just sitting quietly in the cabin waiting for her to return when that seed of calculated suspicion, which he has needed to survive the capitol, takes a hold of him and chokes the life out of any goodness left inside him. it really drives home your terror as a reader that “oh my god did he kill her? did she escape? what happened to her? why would he even think that?” in a way that when the movie had to adjust for visualization it lost some of that holy shit this guy has lost it emphasis.

[julijbee]

girlbossing too close to the sun.

[egophiliac]

Waittt, what did you mean with your last post?? I don't want to spoil myself so I'm waiting for the nightmare before christmas event to arrive on the eng server before diving deep into the wiki. But I HAVE to know; were there hints of Lilia joining in for a rerun or a sequel ??? Your big "OR IS IT???" filled me with way too much hope !! please tell me it wasn't a bit : (

there was a little teaser at the end that implied there'll be a sequel event, though we don't really know anything beyond that! I do think it's likely we'll get the other half of the cast in it, even if it's just wishful thinking on my part. 🤞🤞 NIGHTMARE SUITS FOR EVERYONE!!!!

as far as I know there's been no confirmation on whether it's going to be next year's Halloween event or a separate thing (the snow makes me think it'll be more Christmas-themed, or otherwise more related to the plot of the original movie) so. we're probably going to have to wait quite a while before we find out anything solid. :') they really do love just dropping these things on us and then watching us go absolutely wild with speculation while they watch like

[sualne]

cora and law sketches

[makiswirl]

can i just say. and this is probably a niche hill to die on. that i am so gobsmacked every time someone vaguely hints at the idea that jotaro doesn't care meaningfully for the other crusaders, usually particularly kakyoin and joseph, when those two actually tend to be the ones he reacts to being hurt the hardest

like he cares for his loved ones!!!! that literally plays into his character motives in every single part he shows up in!!! stop lying to me!!!!!!!

[luka-is-slightly-odd]

Currently obsessed with the concept of mutual and acknowledged hanahaki. Like two people who both have hanahaki for each other, and who both know about it, who both know that the other loves them and still aren’t cured.

The flowers stay, not because their love isn’t reciprocated, but because they don’t belive in it, or because its temporary, because the other deserves better, because they have complicated history, because they both already have significant others, perhaps the love isn’t enough because they both can’t put that love first, maybe their ideals and lotalties come first for both. Its not unrequited love, but its not quite enough.

just kinda love the image of two lovers-but-not-yet-maybe-never-lovers sitting together, picking flowers out of each other’s throats.

[kbsd]

reading ww2 rpf is so funny because in addition to “he would not fucking say that” you get things like “that car would not be fucking automatic” or “that item would not be fucking plastic”

[kirby-the-gorb]

[momentomori24]

This may just be me, but I think if you ship a canonically very abusive, manipulative and toxic relationship, you don't get to judge or call anyone degenerates for their own fucked up ships, actually.

[sillyfudgemonkeys]

I need a series where Yangchen/Kuruk/Kyoshi/Roku/Aang/Korra (from their respected novels/shows, guess Kuruk is an outlier tho) and their companions all gather in Korra's timeline and just....react to things. TT0TT Like kfljask;dfla I mostly want it because I think Kyoshi's reactions would just be 90% "WhAT?!/*absolutely flabbergasted*"

Yangchen: Let's go to my island! Kuruk: I'm sorry Yangchen, I sank it Yangchen: How do you sink an island? Kuruk: ...........you forget to cherish- Yangchen: Why couldn't you have destroyed some of my statues instead? >_> Aang: How about we go to Kyoshi's Island? Kyoshi: ????? I have an island??? Why do I have an island??? Korra: Kyoshi, you made it. Kyoshi: ????!!!! What???! Aang: Well more like moved it Kyoshi: ???!! WHaT?! Roku: Though you did make the Kyoshi Warriors! Kyoshi: ???? I did??? Why??? Why that name??? Am I a narcissist???? Aang: *sigh* she also made the Dai Li.... Kyoshi: THE FUCK IS A DAI LI???? Aang: Secret security police for the Earth King. Kyoshi, a known criminal: I DID WHAT?! Roku: Should we tell her she lived to around 230? Kyoshi: HUH??????! Wait. no. That tracks. Kyoshi's companions: WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT TRACKS???? Aang: On second, let's just go to the Northern Air Temple. Yangchen: Oops, can't, I'm banned from going. Aang: ????! WHAT?! You're an Air Nomad, how do you get banned from an Air Temple???? How did YOU get banned, but NOT Kyoshi???? Kuruk: She got a tad bit silly. Roku: Oh let's go to Ma'inka island then! It's suppose to be amazing. Kyoshi, war flashbacks: FUCK NO! You can't make me go back there! Yangchen: Yeah, I'm pretty sure I'm not welcome there either. They hate my guts. I kinda fucked them over. Aang: What is the matter with you two? Korra: Can we just find a place to chill out where Yangchen isn't banned, and Kyoshi isn't having a meltdown?

[yandere-daydreams]

haitham is NOT a stem student his ass doesn't have what it takes to survive the trenches (a four hour organic chem lab just to end up with an impure product). like he's literally a member of haravatat which according to the genshin wiki " is specialized in semiotics, the study of sign processes and meaning-making, and includes disciplines such as linguistics and ancient runes studies." he IS the english major

i see your point anon but i must defend my people. alhaitham is a PHILOSOPHY major with a minor in communications and i won't let him get any closer to a liberal arts degree than that.

[starry-bi-sky]

Part SEVEN of "Clone Danny"

Red Robin, Danny recognizes, steps away from him as he sits up. "My name is Phantom," he signs, blinking the exhaustion out of his eyes. (From Red Robin's perspective, it looks like he has no eyes. There lacks his signature green glow.) "I'm not a gang member, just an out-of-town vigilante."

Red Robin frowns at him, an uncertain grip on the bō in his other hand. "Phantom?" He repeats, no lacking amount of suspicion in his voice. "How can I believe that?"

Right. Yeah, okay, that's fair. Danny shrugs at him, and slumps against the wall. "Google search?" He gestures, he's been out in the daytime before and he's seen the news articles about him.

Red's eyes narrow at him and Danny simply draws his knees up and faceplants into them, half-listening to Red's murmurs into his comm while also trying to get some extra-shut eye.

("Oracle, can you pull up anything on a vigilante named Phantom? The guy here is claiming to be one." Tim says.

"On it."

"Is this Phantom wearing a white mask?" Bruce asks, his voice gruff like an aftershock. "There's a vigilante who shares the same name, but he resides in Illinois."

"Is this guy from that Amity city you visited ages ago?" Says Tim, before shaking his head. "Don't answer that. Yes, he's wearing some freaky mask. I said it reminded me of Hood's helmet for a reason."

"I've got something," Oracle interrupts, "Bats' right. as usual. The Phantom of Amity Park, not much stuff of this guy but he's only been out for over a year. Apparently, his rogues' gallery consists of ghosts."

"Oh great.")

"Look tell the Batman that I'm sorry for trespassing on his turf," He signs irritably when Red Robin eventually starts talking to (re: interrogating) him again. "It's not like I want to be here."

"How did you get in Gotham anyways?" Red Robin questions, batman was on his way to help deal with the situation but Tim doubted he wouldn't get caught up on the way with dealing with petty crime. "Your turf is nearly a thousand miles away from here."

"Two words." Danny deadpans, "Teleport ghost." (Red Robin winces sympathetically.) "I'm keeping this bastard in the thermos for a month for this alone."

(Danny was ignoring the slow-choking anxiety growing in his lungs over how he was gonna get home. He never takes his phone when he goes out, the risk of breaking it was too high. He had no way of contacting anyone to get him home.)

(He swallows the growing lump in his throat, and buries the feeling in the back of his mind.)

"Thermos?"

Danny unclips his Fenton Phantom Thermos off from his belt loop and shows it to Red Robin. "My ghost-catching device," He says with one hand, tilting it carefully for Red to inspect. "I wish I could say I made it, but its a FentonWorks invention."

(He wasn't sure if it was a smart idea to say who it belonged to, but saying it wasn't his probably loosened up any tracks on him, right?)

"Do you work with these Fentons, then?" Red asks, and something dark and shadowy flickers from the corner of Danny's eye. He glances over, and sees nothing, and his hackles raise.

(Either that was Batman, or a ghost, or Danny's mind playing tricks on him. He couldn't feel his ghost sense building in his throat, so he decided it was either the latter of the former.)

Danny snorts, quiet and gruff. "No." He clips his thermos to his belt again, stifling a smile on his face. "The Fentons hate me actually, I prevent them from catching ghosts themselves. Their son gives me their tech."

He had a cover story, so he might as well stick with it, right?

Batman shows up at that moment, appearing atop the little roof where the door is, and giving Danny a heart attack when he speaks in his low, rumbly voice like thunder rolling in, "Why would they hate you for that?"

Danny shoots up to his feet with a startled yell in his throat, clutching his chest as he whirls around and looks up. He nearly runs into Red Robin, and signs a few choice swears at the Bat.

"wow you're scarier in person, asshole."

"you didn't answer my question."

"Of course I didn't, you scared me." and Danny takes a trembling step back when the Batman jumps down and lands on the roof in front of him. He's faced ghosts before, but somehow the living is always scarier.

"But, um, the reason is a bit.. complicated, I guess." He says, fingers beginning to shake as his adrenaline wears off. God is he tired. He wants to go home. "The Fentons are the local ghost hunters and local crazies. I don't know if I can call them mad scientists because they're harmless to the living."

"But they're extremely anti-ghost. I've heard from their son multiple times the very unethical things they would do to ghosts if they got their hands on one."

Danny 'talks' a little more before calling it quits, even telling Batman that he can't tell him more without putting his identity at risk.

Plus, its getting harder and harder to hide his bone-deep exhaustion and his growing fear of being stranded in the most dangerous city in America with no way home.

"I would love to tell you more, believe me I'm dying to." Danny signs, shaky sarcasm dripping from his fingers. His hands are visibly trembling and he's withholding a slowly growing panic attack. "But I would like nothing more than to figure out a way to get home."

"Do you have no one to contact?"

"Sort of. But only one of them could probably come get me and get me back to Amity by sunrise. And I have no phone."

That one person being Ellie.

=====

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 4.5 (Dani interlude) Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 7.5 (Dan Interlude) Part 8

Taglist: @the-navistar-carol @thought-u-said-dragon-queen @gin2212 @youracearocroatneighbour @luckybyrdrobyn @deeplyconfusedbear @epilepticnerd @beautifulmomenttodrawblank @sara0055 @blusunkhild @letmesayfuxk (?) @latheevening226 @tkiesai @rosedasy @meira-3919

[necrotic-nephilim]

jealousy really is the driving force of DamiTim as a ship. love that for them. love how Tim has the Robin mantle ripped away from him and he has to suffer the jealousy of watching Dick and Damian bond. how possessive over Dick Tim can be, to have him stolen by Dick.

even more so though, is the jealousy from Damian. how on earth do you cope when you finally get to be Robin, a role you've convinced is your birthright, and no one really likes you? every prefers the Robin who came before you? Dick regularly reminds you that he can always go and call Tim back when you act out? like the complex Damian has over Tim is unreal. Tim, who was born with a silver spoon in his mouth and had everything handed to him his whole life. he never had to struggle or fight for his place like Damian did. Damian has spent his whole life fighting and proving himself, and yet he can't ever seem to truly claw the mantle of Robin away from Tim. even when Tim lets it go, becomes Red Robin, they seem to share it. Tim can slip back into the role of Robin whenever someone like Dick or Bruce need him to, because *he's* the Robin who they need. he's the Robin who was able to find Bruce. he's the Robin that Ra's wants an heir out of. he's the Robin who even Jason respects. in Damian's eyes, everything Damian has fought tooth and nail for, was handed to Tim.

so of course he's going to react to Tim with violence and aggression, especially after finding out Tim has contingency plans for him. no matter how much Damian proves himself, he's never going to be enough, especially not to Tim. and so his deep refusal to see Tim as family, to acknowledge Tim's legacy is all driven by such an angry jealousy. Tim understands aspects of Bruce's legacy that Damian doesn't, like the need to sweet talk and play nice with the elites of Gotham, even if they're corrupt. they exemplify different aspects of Robin, and the aspects that Tim exemplifies are the aspects that Damian knows he'll never fully understand and therefore holds such a deep contempt for. he wants to fight criminals, not play nice with politicians. Tim understands the side of Gotham that's utterly foreign to Damian. if anything, he represents that side of Gotham, to Damian. a pretty little rich boy who's nothing but a know-it-all and not a real son of Bruce. he can't be a Wayne. he can't be Damian's family.

and all of that angry jealousy leading to unhealthy obsession turned a weird, angry crush from Damian is just my bread and butter. that is how DamiTim should be. to me. Damian obsessed over hating Tim Drake so much he accidentally ends up sort of in love with him and that only makes Damian angrier. because he can't prove everyone right by *also* liking Tim. he can't let Ra's win like that, because frankly why wouldn't Ra's be delighted by Damian and Tim getting together. and it builds and builds with angry passive aggression towards Tim that culminates in angry hate-fucking-that's-not-just-driven-by-hate. love and hate are always viewed as opposites in shipping and i think they're the same intense passion just in different directions. and for the best ships, they're very intertwined. what is DamiTim is not the peak of that. "i put so much of myself into hating you i had no choice but to fall in love with you somewhere along the way" core. love that bleeds into hate and hate that bleeds into love. "you make me so angry i regularly passively try to kill you but not with any real effort because who would i obsess over if you were actually gone" core. murder attempts as a form of courting. contingency plans to take each other out as a love language. they're unwell.

[definitelynotshouting]

alright fellas im giving into my demons, cast your votes on what you want me to do for the upcoming hunger au chapter

[atopvisenyashill]

Thoughts on the Alysanne is Maegor's daughter AU? I feel like it has some interesting potential, and it vastly recontextualizes different parts of Jaehaehae (I do not like him sjsjsjs) and Alysanne's relationship (such as Jaehaehae's treatment of their daughters) but I wanna hear what you think about it!

I’ve touched on this a bit before but since you actually want to hear my thoughts, allow me to present to you my Jaehaerys Is The Goddamn Worst, And Alysanne Annoys Me Too: An Essay lmao but my answer is basically “yeah all of what you just said.”

I think it makes Alysanne much more palatable (to me) as a character because as she stands, she just fixates on forcing her daughters through these fucked up marriages at too young an age bc it traumatized her to be married and pregnant at 15 too but she’d never admit that being a willing participant in her own kidnapping by her brother-husband was the single worst thing that ever happened to her, and because Alysanne doesn’t want to admit it (and Jaehaerys would never see it as wrong or a mistake) F&B really shies away from delving into the fact that Alysanne is as deranged of a mother as Cersei is. So as she stands, she’s very flat to me because she’s presented very flatly and inconsistently. She’s so in love with Jaehaerys, she’s maritally raped by Jaehaerys, she’s a loving and doting mother, she forces her daughters into marriages when they’re the same too young age she was, she accuses her teenage girls of being scheming whores then gets angry when her husband accuses their teenage girls of being scheming whores, and worst of all we are just told “Maegelle tells them to make up so they do” so we don’t know why Alysanne gets over all of this. What is the point of riding a dragon when you never use that dragon to protect your daughters from unwanted teen marriages? We’re just not given a good enough justification for why her behavior is so weird and frustrating towards her daughters.

Make her Maegor’s daughter though…most of her behavior as an adult makes more sense. Like a worse version of Rhaenyra’s childhood almost - a father desperate for a son, but lowkey obsessed with his daughter, who makes all his hang ups about his parents the problems of every woman around him, except Maegor is out here blood sacrificing and torturing and starting wars and forcing babies on wives he discards quickly and brutally. Then here comes Jaehaerys on a white horse green dragon to save her from the horror her life has become, and he loves her so much he runs away with her even though Alyssa says they shouldn’t marry because people won’t like it. And they have beautiful children, and a beautiful marriage, and build a beautiful kingdom.

Then her pregnancies start getting dangerous. Gaemon, then Valerion, die. Alysanne thinks of the shriveled up mutants she called brothers, if Maegor’s taint has passed to her. Her perfect husband ignores her no, and forces Gael on her. Alysanne remembers that he said nothing to Rogar when Alyssa died, merely wept. Then her daughters start to die. Daella, Alyssa, Viserra, all within a few years. Then Jaehaerys makes Saera watch as he murders her boyfriend, calls her a whore, and says Alysanne cannot follow Saera to Lys. Alysanne thinks of Maegor torturing the Harroways over Alys’ presumed infidelity. Jaehaerys says he’s sorry, and her daughter badgers her into forgiving him, and she remembers how she helped Jaehaerys badger Alyssa into forgiving Rogar. Not two years later, Jaehaerys passes over Rhaenys. Alysanne thinks of how she was never enough for her father, how she felt so superior to Rhaena banished to Dragonstone and resented by Aerea, yet there she is dragging Gael away from court because she can’t stand to be with Jaehaerys. How her father was surrounded by dead women and dead babies and how Jaehaerys is surrounded by his own dead daughters, but surely she did the right thing, surely Maegor was worse, surely the realm is better off? Is he right to pass over Rhaenys? Is she enabling a man just as monstrous as her father? She will never decide, because Maegelle will guilt her about keeping Gael isolated at Dragonstone, and Alysanne will do as she’s told, just like Rhaena, and Alyssa, and Jeyne, Elinor, Ceryse, Alys, and Tyanna, just like every one of her daughters.

I do get why Alysanne is Alyssa & Aenys’ and not Maegor’s. The weird Targ babies, the line not descending from Visenya, Jaehaerys and Alysanne being held up as the perfect Targaryen couple specifically because they are brother and sister and dragon riders. I do even think canon Alysanne is likely traumatized by her time as a hostage on Dragonstone, and the ensuing war, and the trauma bond that caused with Jaehaerys, and it makes her idolize Jaehaerys, and then he isolates her at Dragonstone so he can swiftly and safely marry, groom, and knock her up. It’s not like,,,, a fun time, and it’s enough to make anyone crazy and weird about their daughters, but I think having her father be Maegor makes Alysanne herself much deeper because it gives her, as the most beloved Targaryen queen, a blood tie to the most hated Targaryen king, and a marriage to the most beloved Targaryen king. It fits better with a lot of the themes of the main series (again, imo) - forcing the spotlight on the outsiders to see how the affect the story from behind the scenes. The fall of Aegon’s sons, and The Long Reign, not told from the PoV or to serve the PoV of any of the kings or princes, but of the queen that tied them all together.