#and didnt say anything back then n regretted it? so the moment she realized its me again she was like

[cimicherrychanga]

you look like the person at any social event/supermarket who i am captivated by for their confidence and style but would never go up to and bother about it

my dream is to be that mesmerising attractive person u cross paths with but dont rly talk to and then you spend the next few weeks thinking abt them and the things you couldve said

[ddarker-dreams]

for some reason nexus, by far, is the story where i felt most 'trapped'. honestly, i loved the way you wrote nexus, it feels a lot like a movie wtfff....

i often get a sense that most of your works are a lot reminiscent to classic novels to me, but this one felt like a movie! its actually amazing how flexible u are lol

mommy issues aside, that will be in another ask- lear. that hurt me.

i have to admit, i didnt really care for lear so much until ch 3 or 4, because i finally realized wow this guy is actually.............. genuinely nice. hes cute. in irl id maybe have heart eyes for a guy like him.

the sequence where reader has flashbacks of lear and lear probably being the first and only person to know her intimately (IN AN EMOTIONAL SENSE NOT THAT WAY) absolutely hit me harder because i eventually thought "WHY didnt i pay attention to lear in the first place?!" i initially didnt care for him because my mind was all BLADEE BLADEEEE, but now... fuck, lear, i shouldve been with you since day 1.

another interesting thing id like to think about is how reader's regrets, are definitely feelings that nona and lear are experiencing as well. all three are most likely, simutaneously although perhaps now lightyears away instead of mere walls parting them, thinking about their regrets over a loss thats almost like death. where will lear ever put his love now that n darling isnt around anymore? he can only look back to his memories and pray that it's enough to soothe him. would nona regret ever being mean to n darling, skipping her studies, and perhaps later on she would viewed herself as a burden to n darling in the past?

so much to think about, and so little emotional capacity i have to hold the overflowing emotions...

i love nexus and especially YOU LOCK !!!!!

omg i think it's cool that you found nexus' style similar to a movie... the scenes i imagined in my head felt cinematic-ish, especially n darling recalls previous dialogue at certain moments for emotional amplification™. i didn't think about it reflecting in the writing much, but i see what you mean now 😌 there's a lot of emphasis on visuals for prose and metaphors.

A LEAR TRUTHER !!! i wanted him to serve as a foil to blade, so i think once blade started pulling more shenanigans, lear's care for n darling stands out more. lear could've fallen in that possessive pitfall but he's simply built different.

aaa regrets and "i should've x" feel like some of the most effective forms of horror, since it's a universal experience. maybe not the exact scenarios themselves, but everyone's had that moment when they realized how they should've done things differently. when the news comes to light, lear will undoubtedly be emotionally devastated. nona will be as well, though her pain would manifest in anger more than depression. she'd be mad at n darling first, then mad at herself for not being able to do anything to help.

i can't leave them in suffering limbo though 😭 the astral express crew will be who take care of the stellaron crisis on eris. inevitably, they'll meet with lear and nona. the grief won't go away entirely, but the express crew will do/say things that help.

THANK YOU SO MUCH !!! i loved reading your thoughts 🥺 thank you thank you!!!!

[symphorine]

end of game thoughts! basically all if act 3 i think. i put it in a notes app as i was playing so this is my thoughts as i went :') bed time now good night all

point of no return... end of game here i come

oh yes. i suppose we didnt account for them MAKING an eclipse. altho with elgarnan being lord of the day and night maybe we should have rip.

weird long pause when making the little speech... also god. some rly cheesy lines. it was cute a few times but its just kinda grating now. also "we might not all make it back" haha. lol. lmao even.

im making the rounds before checking on my li and actually not everyone rly has smth to say thats like... relevant to the situation??? why not??? Harding gave me a line that was clearly from around the treviso/minrathous decision! neve talked to me about bellara's serials 😭 what

lucanis "they moved the /moon/" idk what to tell u babe. ur right. we are fucked. onwards!

"if i have to kill every blighted creature in thedas to keep you safe, i will." no zevran but i like it anyway. also frustrated that rooks tone is always very similar no matter what mood u choose. the inq had little personality but rook Has One Personality which... i dont think is better. and even then ive had moments of They Would Not Fucking Say That. sigh.

also like... its sweet. but weve had so little romance content before that its... a little out of nowhere? just like. idk. i guess it never feels like enough. ill table this for now. later edit: yeah the i love you moment of later on doesnt feel super earned. i feel like some romance specific lines/banter, maybe a scene or two, would have helped flesh it out more.

oh we're gonna talk to varric? FAscinating 🙃🙂🙃🙂🙃🙂🙃🙂 oh my god this is excruciating give me the reveal now i cant go through more varric stock phrases.

man are u telling me we really never get to suspect anything????? this sucks. i know somethings wrong!!! before i got spoiled halfway through i was already suspicious!!! why can't rook be also!!!!

i know whoever i choose is gonna die and im :((((((((

ok very funny that its the endgame but we can still get loot. bro what am i gonna do with a flawless crystal now, chuck it at the archdemon? (dont get me wrong im collecting all that)

neve asked what the antaam was chanting and my rook answered... how would they even know. theyre an elf and a warden

got a codex entry that says "andruil is gone. lost." and during their confrontation solas and elgarnan also said the other evanuris were dead... but solas imprisoned all of them right? so what happened? did solas kill them during that ritual? or manage to transfer them first? did they get consumed by the blight in their prison? were they already dead and he imprisoned their corpses?

SOLAS YOU MOTHERFUCKER

mortals cannot win this LET US TRY. HELP US. WHAT IS THIS. IM GOING TO TEAR YOU APART WITH TWEEZERS AND BANISH EVERY FRAGMENT OF YOU ACROSS THE FADE AND THE MORTAL WORLD.

ok i will say having allllmost romanced bellara and hcing rook and her are very close, seeing all those regret statues of her is hitting a little bit.

OH SHE TALKED... BELLARA ;n;

ooooh... "you taught me it was okay to be angry. that sometimes you /have/ to be. but that it shouldn't destroy you." actually so very fitting here when daea is feeling absolute rage and despair. they should be angry but they cant let it destroy and control them. they have to be a person and not an emotion. aughoughoughhhh

SHOT OF THE DOOR LEADING TO VARRICS ROOM... DAEA'S BEEN FEELING LIKE SOMETHING WRONG BUT UNABLE TO PUT THEIR FINGER ON IT... THEYVE DREAMED ABOUT THE DOOR BUT DIDNT REALIZE WHAT IT WAS... OOOOOOH

THE WHOLE TIME. THE WHOLE TIME!!! AND HE TOLD ME TO SAY SORRY TO VARRIC!!!!! AND NO ONE TALKED ABOUT HIM. SOLAS IM COMING FOR YOU.

pretty sure he didnt mean to OKAY AND THE REST??? THAT WASNT AN ACCIDENT.

wait so. was it solas impersonating varric or was it rook just... making him up in the fade???? what??? also wow why did no one ever try to talk to me about varric at all.

"only the venatori survived" sooo did they kill dorian?

man. and after all that the devs still hope i might feel sorry for solas? lol.

mannnn we were in there for days????

awww the little romance scene with lucanis was very sweet. his romance overall is very like. some sweetness amidst the desolation kind of feeling. i like it.

honestly daea has always gotten along ok with spite but right now? best buds.

i liked the little cinematics... we fightin. also i ended up with lucanis and davrin as a team which is a nice echo of weisshaupt - they fought about it, both feeling guilty, both wanting second chances. we're here now.

the venatori said "this is for zara!" and lucanis replied "she's dead. get over it!" beautiful

WE'RE GOING TO TALK TO SOLAS ALONE?? ON AN ELEVATED PLATFORM??? WHILE HE'S DOING MAGIC???? HE BETTER NOT STAB ME

"you are as surprising as ever. even i could not escape that prison. for you to manage it..." you absolute narrow minded imbecile. im going to stab YOU.

ok i cant liveblog the test of this conversation but im not happy. solas im going to bury you in manure. also confirmation solas did the varric thing. little fucker. oooh hes feeling bad now YEAH I DONT CARE AND NEITHER DOES DAEA

"by love for friends ive failed and hurt" maybe. if you stopped killing your friends. youd have more of them. and less hurt. ever thought about that.

BELLARAAAAA

ok fine the wolf transformation was cool. whatever.

aw dorians alive. also the inquisitor showing up with no armor... listen. was it really that hard to ask us for their class so u could give them some armor for this. like truly.

bellara... my blighted darling...

ok we get a little bit of factions helping each other at the end in a codex entry. why couldnt we get more? :( also i wish ambient dialogue that you accidentally cut off triggered again, like for companion banter

oh solas lied again. shocking. when did all the other gods die tho??? did i miss something????

when i ask if drawing solas' blood is the only solution i didnt mean that i didnt wanna do blood magic just that i wondered if there was an easier way... man the way the game treats blood magic... unsurprising but frustrating.

jdhdksks bc of the stupid high crits i get combat against small fry rly backs up the "i dont have time for this" feeling for daea. warrior fighting has been soooo fun and satisfying... i started dao for the very first time with a sword and shield warrior too and it was <3 atrocious <3 but im glad i picked this for davg

kinda wanna do another warden run with either bel or neve romance and being blighted wt the end... blight girlfriends <3 yay <3

so funny to me that when u can open a door the handle is highlighted. but rook has never learned to use a doorknob. not a single time through this while game.

couldnt they have made wolf solas... nicer... hairier- hold on is this because hes bald.

oooh bellara 😭😭😭 putting herself back into the blight 😭😭😭😭

"you... are mortal, elgarnan. enjoy it while it lasts!" YEAH OK COOL TOO

i like that even though i (and daea) am angry at solas for the, yknow, everything, its still satisfying to see him get his justice/revenge on elgarnan. it feels right.

U CAN SWITCH ARMOR BEFORE FIGHTING HIM AGAIN FLSGSLDHDLS ive been switching between 2 armors bc 1 is a good all rounder but another gives me v good protection against fire. so since elgarnan is clearly gonna be using fire now i went to see if i could switch to the fireproof one. and i can. amazing. also he was vulnerable to necrotic damage first and is vulnerable to ice now... i brought lucanis and neve... good pairing :>

man... i got all options. i think... daea is so angry at solas. for their friends, for all his victims, for themselves as a dalish elf and a warden. but theyre tired of fighting. and if they can ask him to stop before having to kill another god today... and thinking abt harding's words in the fade prison... hmmm... interesting in the sense that theyve been angry, lighthearted and nice but with a lot of that anger and desire for justice underneath, but now at the end theyre choosing to get past it. theyre tired of it. mmmm

ballaraaaaaaAAA UNBLIGHTED????? CAN WE CURE THE GODDAMN BLIGHT NOW????? BIOWARE

archon dorian... jdhsks hes the last magister left basically. he gets the seat by default. also every time we talk abt the griffons i have... questions abt how theyre gonna breed them out of extinction. idk maybe genetics work differently for griffons. better hope thats how it works cause otherwise uuuh extinction is just delayed

anyway i am a little baffled by that one chest i found after being able to interact with the last merchant but otherwise act 3 was v well done i think. not rly much more to say, it satisfied me, i liked that i got to actually fight (verbally) with solas lol and i do think the "good" ending of convincing him to bind the veil to himself was actually rewarding for me as a player, even when i spent the game exasperated at him. good voice acting but also good body language there!!! which was a pleasant surprise since body animations are a little lacking imo for the rest of the game. bellara worked rly well for the role of the blighted companion so im glad i picked her! curious if neve has different dialogue, bc if not then bellara is def best. a little sad that hardings gone but also baffled at like. the wasted potential for a further storyline??? this isnt dao they knew to plan for a possible future game, but harding can be permanently dead, so...? altho. i guess we didnt actually get the body after. no body no death? dead but not entirely, part of the stone now? hmmmm

ill replay it for sure, the ending/act 3 actually sold me more on the game. i stilllll think as a dragon age continuation its... err. not what i wanted. not what id have liked. all the retcon and smoothing over of potential... meanness or people/faction being bad stings and spells a future direction im just not that interested in for the dragon age universe. but as a game? yeah i enjoyed it, i liked the gameplay, the npcs, found the romance a little lacking but rly liked the amount of inter companion interaction and reactivity, i thought all companion quests had a good emotional end, the game itself is very pretty, im annoyed at the sort of One General Personality With Small Variations that rook seems to have (mostly bc itll be hard to like... feel like playthroughs are very different/rooks are different ppl), but tbh im about as annoyed with it as i was with the inquisitor, just differently. think they should def have done smth different for the inquisitor in davg bc that showed theyd learned nothing of the reaction to hawke in dai, but i expected it lol. i liked the music eventually! the main theme even grew on me. i have more particular gripes with lore/character treatment but ill let that simmer for a bit. im gonna go to bed nowwww

ps not suuuper happy about the solas toesucking tone that keeps popping up tho. it was hard to say i was angry at him for most of the game! to express it! and ur clearly presented with, at least, a lot of reasons to feel bad for him. and when u talk to the inquisitor... hmmm. yeah. altho i suppose ill try with my (never-finished-the-playthrough) solasmancing inquisitor next run and see what thats like

can't sleep so gonna jot down some thoughts abt davg under a readmore. itll have spoilers!

[honeypirate]

bestie bestie bakugou

Bakugou and fem!reader, best friends, roommates, loveeee

Warning - swears, mentions of sex

You were walking around the city for hours now, you left the apartment just before sundown and now it’s raining and you think you see the light from the sun turning the clouds lighter on the horizon. You came home after a long day of work, of fighting a villain, of almost not making it back this time, to find your boyfriend, who you didnt even live with mind you, fucking someone else on your bed. You didn’t say anything, you just walked out, quietly, he didn’t even notice. 

The buzzing in your hand caught your attention, making you aware of the heaviness of something in your palm, you raise it to see and then remember it’s your phone. The action causes it to wake up, showing your notifications, 50 missed calls from him and almost as many texts and double the amount of calls and texts from your two best friends

The screen catches the water from the rain as it flows down the surface, you try to unlock your phone, a sudden urge to not be alone hitting you, but your thumb was too cold and wet to unlock with the fingerprint. You go to press in the buttons but the screen doesnt recognize your fingers either, you’re starting to panic, to hyperventilate when the screen lights up, you relax seeing the name pop up and try to answer but you were shaking so much, you brought the phone to your lips, sticking your tongue out to click the green button. 

“Fucking bastard is going to die” he says as he wraps you in a towel, pulling you to his chest, “y/n im so sorry. You’re staying here with me for now on, i’ll go to your place tomorrow and get some of your things and get your key back from that fucker.” he was pissed, fuming, you haven't seen him this mad since high school “Katsuki i couldn't possibly put you out” he holds his finger to your lips “shut up, im insisting, plus this place is too big for just me” you chuckle through the shivers that are now finding your body, your skin and bones finally reacting to the cold as your body shakes uncontrollably. “T-t-thank you K-Kacchan” he sighs and takes your hand, pulling you with him down the hall to the bathroom. 

After a really nice shower, you exit his big ass fancy shower that was really more like a spaceship, you had to use a step stool to get inside it. It had multiple different heads, a steam option, and could even convert into a jacuzzi, if only you didn’t feel like a bath was too close to being a ‘you’ flavored soup. 

You find a change of clothes for you waiting on his bed, a pair of his sweats and one of his shirts, you brought them to your nose, taking a deep breath. They smelled like downey, the yellow kind your parents used to use, it smelt comforting. You slip on his clothes and feel like you’re getting a hug from him. 

When you make it back to the kitchen you have the shivers again, your wet hair making your back wet. He takes one look at you, arms hugged around your body, and he throws you over his shoulder and takes you right back to his room. He sets you down on the bed and then takes a hold of his hood and pulls his hoodie off, shoving it down over your head. “I’m making you some tea and then you are going to talk to me more if you feel like it okay?” you nod with a small smile as you pop your arms through the sleeves. 

Its been six months, Bakugou has helped you heal through your pain, he got you some things from your apartment and got your key back. He also officially, and with pleasure, told your ex to fuck off, that it was over and to never contact you again, with too many threats to count. He really enjoyed it and wanted to do it for a long time but he’d never tell you that. You cut your ex out of your life, easily letting him go because if you caught him cheating once who knows how long he did it, you were 100% okay with never seeing him again, the hard part was waiting for the feelings to go away, to rid yourself of the habit that was your ex. 

You tried to go back to your apartment after a few weeks, it was fine for the most part, you found a completely new bed in your room courtesy of Bakugou and although he denies it wholeheartedly you know no one else would have done that,... but after a few days you called Bakugou, telling him that it just felt empty and that it didn’t feel like your home anymore, he invited you to move in immediately and you never looked back. 

Your new bed and all the furniture you didn't sell sit proudly in the spacious spare bedroom at Bakugous apartment. He was right, this apartment was way too big for one person.

Bakugou had girls over periodically and you didn’t mind them at first, you even made them breakfast sometimes, on the off chance Bakugou slept late and didn’t kick them out immediately. He’s never liked the morning after, the girls he has dated were just to fill the hole in his soul made by the feelings he has developed for you. He’s trying to find one that makes him feel as electric as you make him feel. 

After a month of random girls you start to notice yourself resenting the girls you hear him with, the way they fake moan in the bedroom, loudly just so you will hear and then they will give you evil stares as they walk out in the morning. You asked Yao-Momo for some advice once, calling her after you hear another loud girl as you went to the kitchen for some ice cream, losing your appetite you left the ice cream on the counter and just left the kitchen (just eyerolling when he tried to give you shit about it) . “just ask him to stop” you sigh “I cant do that. I dont want to cause him any trouble. I just dont know why he has to go for girls like that” you fake throw up and she laughs “y/n do you think you like bakugou?” she asks and you gasp “of course not! He’s my best friend! And hes bakugou! I couldnt possibly…” you pause for a while as you think, were you really discovering feelings for the blasty explosion boy? This was such a rub. She just laughs at you from over the phone “unclench your jaw y/n. Dont be so tense” you realize shes right as you release your teeth, relaxing your face and jaw “you know me so well” you say with a laugh “of course i do. I’m your real best friend. Not some ill tempered boy. If you like him great, tell him and he’ll stop fucking randoms or if you dont like him tell him to stop fucking randoms so loud” you laugh “so wise Yao-momo, me lovely sensei Yao-Momo” she laughs at you before you guys have to hang up, both having work in the morning. 

After the next few days you realized just how in love you were with him, getting more and more annoyed with the girls he brought home, not even noticing that they were showing up less and less, pretty soon the random girls have stopped coming over all together, not that you knew that, you still heard what seemed to be sex noises from his room every once in a while, you just assumed he kicked them out right after, not that he was thinking about you and … you know wink wink  

Another six months later  you’re with him on a mission, the villains just keep coming wave after wave, a quirk controlling their (dead before you even came around) bodies, it was never ending, if you stopped fighting they would kill you and you didn’t know who the villain was or where they were. You had your agencies looking for them and until then you had to fight, to keep these bodies occupied so they didn't bring chaos anywhere else. You didn’t talk during the fighting but you both were paying more attention to making sure that the other was fine that you ended up just fighting the villains going after each other. When you get home, battered, bruised, and covered in sweat and blood and many tears, you each take turns showering in his amazing shower, you couldn't use a normal shower for your sore muscles. 

You made a meal for you both quietly as he showered, too tired to speak or do more than was required, when he came to find you he almost cried with relief at your home cooked meal, he was starving. You ate together in silence, both reflecting on the battle, both reliving every moment where you almost lost the other, where you almost lost the fight, feeling more and more anxious the more you thought about it. What would you have done without him? You didnt want to lose him and regret never telling him, but you know you are way to exhausted to speak. 

You stare at each other in the hallway, both wanting to say something, to not leave each other yet. You turn to go and he grabs your hand, pulling you with him into his room before climbing in bed and pulling you along with him down into his soft comfortable bed, he pulls you to his chest and you feel all your stress and anxiety leave your body. He kisses the back of your head “I love you” he whispers into your hair, the only energy he has left. You turn in his arms to look at him and see his eyes blink slowly, he can hardly hold them open anymore. You smile softly “I love you” you whisper back and he sighs, a happy smile on his lips as he lets his eyes close “good” he says and you chuckle, your eyes closing as you lean forward, pressing a soft kiss to his lips before allowing yourself to fall asleep, the feeling of his arm around you and the sound of his soft breaths comforting you.

[oscar-lettjohanssonloveme]

Little Sunshine (Miss Venable x reader x Alice Macray)

okay..hi :) this is reallyyyy long xD And its the story of this 3 cuties and how they fell in love with each other.. Well, its a little bit like the 3. part of “purple roses” (purple roses u can find here: https://littlejeaniehugsbumblebees.tumblr.com/post/640902350735818752/purple-roses-ms-venable-x-reader ) 

I know, that there is no second part online today, but there will be! If u didnt read the first part, u dont need to, coz i wrote this fanfiction that way, that u dont have to read the first part, i guess its angst idk

anygays my english is a mess, thats why i use google translate:’)

can we just talk about the fact, how perfect alice and mina would match? Mina the hot top with all that bdsm vibes and on the other hand we got the cute and innocent Alice sksksks

I guess Mina is the protagonist of this fanfic 

A good description of your relationship would have been complicated. Because it was all incredibly complicated. Don't get me wrong, you loved your girlfriends and they loved you, but sometimes when you woke up between the two of them, when Mina had her arms wrapped around you from behind and when Alice was cuddled with her head against your chest, you might just be confused how all of that could be possible.

And sometimes you couldn't help but wonder what your life would be like without one of your girlfriends. But you knew that you could never live without one of them, that was a fact.

You needed both to be happy, there was no other way.

Mina brought firmness and structure into your life. Thanks to her, you had developed routines for your daily routine and were no longer so distracted. And you loved the fact about her that she was more rational than emotional about things.

And every time she went on a business trip and left Alice and you at home alone, a huge mess broke out and all structures were thrown away.

You would oversleep in the morning, be late for work and your house would turn into a huge disaster and mess.

It just wouldn't work without Mina.

Alice, on the other hand, was the most innocent, gentle, and naive person you had ever met. Mina helped you solve your problems, but Alice helped you understand and accept them. In addition, Alice was incredibly cute and she was fantastic at cooking.

And whenever you needed it, she was there to hug you and tell you how much she loved you.

And the proof that it wouldn't work without Alice was the relationship you had with Mina before Alice came into your life. At the moment when everything you had with Mina broke, it seemed like God would have sent a gentle angel to save you.

----------------------

"This is going to be a new record .." you said as you leaned into the door frame to watch your girlfriend who was still working at her desk.

"What do you mean?", She lifted her gaze from her laptop in confusion to stare at you with a frown.

"You have been home for 4 hours and are still working .."

Mina sighed and rubbed her temples.

"I just have to make one phone call and then I'm done .." she muttered with her eyes closed.

"You always say that ..." you started, shaking your head. "One last phone call, one last document, one last email ... and then it's 10 p.m."

Mina was startled at your words and took a quick look at the clock on her laptop. You were right, it was 10 p.m.

"I doesn't matter ..." you sighed and turned to go back into the hallway.

"I'm going to bed, good night Wilhemina ..."

"Good night .." she replied quietly and stared after you.

Wilhemina.

That's what you called her only when you were angry.

Mina swore quietly and grabbed her phone before dialing the directory assistance number and letting it ring.

"Uhm..Hello, you're connected to the directory assistance, I'm Alice ..", came a soft female voice, which sounded a bit too happy for Mina's taste.

"I want you to find Lennox Fischer's private email address for me ..", Mina said in a commanding tone.

There was silence on the other end of the phone for a moment before the woman, Alice, continued.

"We have actually been closed since 6 p.m. .."

"Then you shouldn't have answered the call, could you still find this address for me?" Mina sighed and propped her chin on her palm.

"Give me a minute ... I've only been working here for a few weeks ...", Alice laughed nervously and Mina closed her eyes in annoyance.

"That's when I realize I shouldn't have told you my name .." Alice remarked after a few seconds.

"How tragic .." Mina replied ironically and pinched the bridge of her nose.

"Do you have the email address?"

"I'm sorry..but what was the name again?"

"Damn it, it's not that difficult. Then why do you have this job if you can't get anything done anyway? I've rarely met someone who is as damn unqualified as you," barked Mina and slapped the table with the flat of her hand.

"You have no idea .." the other woman yelled back.

"Can you all stop being so impatient with me? I'm only human too ... And all because you're too lazy to look for it yourself and now take out your frustration on me ... I'm getting this right now not paid either, so it takes as long as it takes. And if you have a problem with it, fuck off.."

Miss Venable stared in confusion at the phone in her hand.

"Uhm, I'm sorry ..", she stammered overwhelmed.

"It's just that my girlfriend is impatiently waiting for me to finally get to bed .."

On the other end of the phone, Alice snorted.

"Yours too, yes? Get a divorce from her, even if she's just your girlfriend, it makes everything easier..You know- "

"Lennox Fischer ..", Mina interrupted the woman to bring her back to the subject.

"Oh yeah .. m'sorry .." Alice muttered and laughed nervously again. "You have to know that I got divorced from my husband two months ago and it's all a little bit complicated .."

"Aha."

"Well, I now have his email address, can you write it down? Then I'll dictate it to you .." Alice said and Mina sat down straight again to type in the email address down that Alice dictated to her on the phone.

"Good .." Alice said and sounded polite again.

"Then I thank you for your call and hope I could help you .."

Mina let out a small snort and had to grin at the strange woman.

"I have to thank you .." she muttered before hanging up and finally shutting down her laptop.

When she finally opened the door to your bedroom, you were lying with your back to her in bed and she couldn't tell whether you were still awake or already asleep. She undressed quietly and then climbed into bed behind you.

"Honey?" She whispered softly as she leaned over to gently press kisses against your exposed shoulder. "Are you still awake?"

"Nope .." you made with your eyes closed and Mina laughed quietly.

You blinked against the darkness of the room as you turned your head to face her. Your girlfriend was hunched over you naked, looking guiltily at you. After staring at her for a moment, you reached out your hand to reach behind her head and carefully pulled the hair tie out of her hair. Long red hair fell down her face and the ends of her hair tickled your cheeks.

"I'm done with everything now .." she whispered, smiling gently.

"Now is half past ten ..", your hand slid from the back of her head to her cheek to linger there.

"Now is a little bit late.."

"I know and I'm sorry .." she muttered and you could hear the regret in her voice. But a simple "sorry" wasn't enough for you anymore.

You sighed before you sat up and leaned against the headboard of the bed.

"Look, I know you have to work a lot, but sometimes it's just too much you know?"

Mina, who had also leaned against the headboard, nodded shortly before you continued.

"It's not about that the whole thing can't be healthy for you. I mean more us ... Although that might be a bit selfish, I know you love your work, but I uhm .. I don't know- you know, you work all the time and even on weekends and I know it's not your fault, but I just can't do this anymore..I'm sorry that I claim your affection so much, but I just need you and you have no time .. "

Carefully you looked over at Mina, who sadly returned your gaze.

"I'm sorry .." she whispered and grabbed your hand to pull you close to her so you could rest your head on her chest.

"I'll do better, I promise .."

"I know I'm no better myself .." you muttered as she began to comb through your hair gently.

"As a professor at this college, I have to work a lot too, but not until 10 p.m."

"I'll do better .." she repeated and you smiled before leaning over to press your lips against her cheek for a moment.

"That's all I want .." you pulled back and lay back on your side of the bed. Your girlfriend was not long in coming and lay behind you before she put an arm around you and pulled you back to her.

"What do you think if we go out after work tomorrow ..?" She whispered in your ear.

You hummed in agreement. "That's a great idea..".

"Yes?"

"Yeah .." you muttered with your eyes closed.

"Good night Mina ..".

"Good night baby .."

---------------

You slammed the car door angrily before turning around to stomp up the steps to your front door. You were angry. Very angry. After you hurried to get off work as quickly as possible, you drove to the restaurant where you had an appointment, only to wait an hour for someone who didn't come and now you drove back home and then to see Mina's car parked in the garage.

"Wilhemina fucking Venable .." you shouted as you opened the front door.

"How dare you humiliate me so much ..".

You ran to her workspace and as you expected she was sitting at her desk in front of her laptop and seemed to be working. Her brown eyes widened when she saw you angrily standing in the doorway.

"I'm so sorry ..", she stammered and got up.

"Oh of course you are .." you hissed with narrowed eyes.

"I called you 4 times while I sat in this stupid restaurant for an hour .. You can't imagine how embarrassing it was, the waiter felt so sorry for me that I didn't have to pay for my tea .. "

Your girlfriend stared helplessly at you.

"Like I said, I'm sorry, Y / N .. i was just so busy and then I forgot .."

"So do you admit you've forgotten? You know, at one point I thought you might be doing this on purpose because you think it's funny."

"I never could, I-", she began, but you raised your hand to silence her.

"The only problem is that you always do that .." you bit your lip.

"You promise me so often that you will spend time with me only to then skip it for your work .. Then just leave it straight away and I don't always have to make myself hopes, only to be disappointed ..".

"Y / N please .. I'm as good as finished .. We can still go somewhere and have dinner ..", she looked at you desperately, but you just shook your head.

"Just forget it, Mina .." you muttered before turning around to leave her workspace . She looked after you sadly before let out a frustrated moan and slumped back into her desk chair.

How could she have forgotten?

Reluctantly, she picked up her phone and dialed the directory assistance number like the night before.

"Hello, you are connected to Directory Assistance .." said the same soft voice as last night.

"Alice ..", Mina remarked and didn't really want to notice.

"Ohh you're the rude woman from last night .." Alice laughed on the other end of the phone.

"The one with the impatient girlfriend .."

"Now more likely the one with the hating girlfriend ..".

"What did you do wrong?", Mina could hear real concern in the woman's voice and that confused her. She didn't even know this woman.

"She's upset because I always move her for work .." she mumbled.

"It's not your fault if you have to work."

"Exactly! ..", Mina shouted loudly and was surprised by her own volume.

At the other end it was quiet and Mina noticed that the whole thing was more than just private right now. She cleared her throat just before continuing.

"Can you find out Leigh Chaplin's phone number for me?"

"Of course..give me a minute .." Alice muttered and Mina heard Alice tapping on the keyboard through the receiver. For a brief moment Mina thought about just hanging up. That call was quite weird and had taken on a very personal direction. But just when she really wanted to hang up, Alice began to dictate the phone number to her and she had to take notes.

--------------------

Mina had decided to make amends for what had happened a few days ago. The only problem was, whenever you had time, she couldn't. And once she was done with everything, you had to work. It was a never-ending cycle that dragged you both further and further down. And the worst part was that you both knew that and still couldn't do anything about it. She loved her work as much as you loved yours and neither of you would ever be willing to sacrifice your work for the other.

And yet Mina had decided to make it up to you and that meant for her to help you with saving time. That's why she was now at the city library to bring back the books for you that you had borrowed a few weeks ago. Actually you had your own little library in your house, because you valued books very much, but at some point all these books were read and you were both not people who read books again.

And as a college professor, you had a habit of researching books rather than the internet anyway.

Here she was now, hobbling her stick through the library building. Which turned out to be quite difficult as she was holding your books in one arm and then had to go through the big building with her stick. If she were to trip and fall, she would have no way of catching herself. Mina knew that this would probably never happen, but still she didn't like the feeling.

But of course it happened as it had to, as always in such situations. It wasn't Mina who fell, but it was one of the books that slipped out of the crook of her arm and landed with a thud on the wooden floor of the library. How much she hated that ... such situations were almost unbearable for her. Simply because it was embarrassing to know that because of her scoliosis she was unable to bend down to pick up the book herself.

She wanted to swear loudly, but she knew that a library might not be the best place for this. She poked her senselesslyn stick around on the book and tried to put it upright somehow, only to grab it. But it was useless. Of course it had to be the thickest of your books that she had dropped. Her stick seemed to be against it like a thin branch.

"Let me help you .." suddenly came a soft voice from behind her and made her flinch. Mina turned around and looked into the friendly face of a petite woman with light brown hair.

"Your book ..", the woman said when Mina didn't answer and pointed to it with an outstretched finger. Again Miss Venable didn't answer and just stared at the woman in front of her. She was 100% sure she had never seen her before, but her voice ... She knew that soft voice, she just didn't know where from.

Without hesitating for another second, the strange woman bent down and picked up the book.

"You are welcome ..", she smiled and put the book back in the crook of Mina.

"Thank you ..", Mina mumbled, still staring at the woman in front of her, confused.

"I'm sorry, but do we know each other?"

"I think I would know that..", the woman laughed and suddenly Mina knew who she was looking at.

"You're Alice .." she uttered. "Alice from directory assistance ..".

Alice's eyes widened.

"Then you must be the one with the impatient, hating girlfriend .."

Mina's pale skin turned red at the other woman's words and she began tapping the floor with her stick in an irregular rhythm, as she always did when she was nervous.

"I may have exaggerated a bit .." she muttered. "She doesn't hate me ..".

"Well, I'm glad .." Alice honestly smiled before she nodded at the books in Mina's arms with her chin. "By the way, you have a very good taste in books .."

Mina's gaze followed that of the woman in front of her and landed on the book that she had dropped.

"Oh..these aren't my books, my girlfriend read them .."

"So she has a very good taste in books ...".

Mina nodded briefly while she was still staring at Alice. The fact that she had actually met this woman was so weird that it couldn't be a coincidence.

"Uhm .. I should bring the books back .." she muttered and Alice nodded quickly.

"I can wait .." said Alice.

"So .. if you want .." she added quickly when she noticed Mina frown.

Mina narrowed her eyes while she could only stare again. Alice exuded such confidence and she was so kind, it was like she couldn't help but agree.

"Okay .." Mina muttered. "Just give me a minute ..".

Alice's eyes began to glow.

"Perfect .." she said, beaming. "I'll wait outside."

Mina nodded shortly before leaving Alice to return the books.

"Where is your car?" Mina asked Alice as she stepped out of the library.

"Oh uhm I came here on foot .." Alice muttered and Mina frowned.

"It's getting dark .." she said curtly and Alice, who obviously didn't know what to do with that remark, nodded shortly.

"I can drive you home."

Mina studied Alice's face for any dislikes, but the woman just smiled again.

"That would be nice..".

Mina nodded again before going to her car with Alice.

"Well ..", Mina began after getting into the car with Alice.

"Where do you live?" She looked at Alice from the side, who was desperately trying to put the strap over her blouse so that it wouldn't crease.

"Uhm..Woodhill Avenue ..", the woman mumbled when she was finally satisfied.

"You can't be serious ..", Mina stared at Alice, not sure whether to laugh or be upset. "We live on the same street .."

"Oh really?" Alice's eyes lit up again.

Mina just hummed in agreement before starting the car.

For a few minutes they drove through the crowded streets and neither said a word. And although something like that was usually uncomfortable, at that moment it was actually quite pleasant, at least that's what Mina thought.

"Actually we know the whole neighborhood, but I've never heard of an Alice, nor have I seen you ...", she said finally as she turned into the long street of Woodhill Avenue.

"Well .. actually I don't live there .. I think I told you that I separated from my husband and since then I've been living with my daughter ..", Alice explained and Mina didn't even need to look at her to see how the woman was uncomfortable with the topic.

"I'm sorry .." she said curtly.

"Oh no .. you know, I'm happy the way it is now, at least I'm happier than I was with Buck a few months ago ..".

Mina didn't know what to answer, so she decided not to say anything again.

"Do you know the people who live in this house?" Alice suddenly asked and pointed to the building that Mina referred to as her home. "Venable and Y / L / N are their names .. My daughter told me that everyone is afraid of them .."

Mina stared at Alice and when she realized that the woman was serious, she started to laugh.

"Is it really that bad that everyone is afraid of us?", Mina said and couldn't help but grin as she watched the eyes of the woman next to her widen.

"Wait..I- you live in the house with your girlfriend?" Alice stammered and Mina nodded.

"I'm so sorry ... God ..this embarrassing .."

Alice buried her face in her hands and stared between her fingers at the house where you lived with Mina.

"Well, it's a nice house ..", she muttered, trying to get out of this situation somehow. Mina just snorted in amusement before continuing down the street with the car.

"Which house does your daughter live in?"

"In the green one over there .." Alice muttered and Mina's eyes landed on a green low-rise building.

"Ohh your daughter is Evangeline ..", Mina remarked as she parked the car in front of the house.

"You know her?" Alice sounded confused.

Mina nodded.

"I've never really spoken to her before, but I know her .."

"Okay .." Alice frowned before reaching for the seat belt to unbuckle her.

"That's when I notice, I don't even know what your name is ..".

"Miss Venable .." Mina said curtly and bit the inside of her cheek.

"uhm..or Wilhemina .."

Alice smiled.

"Well, then thank you, Wilhemina, for taking me home .."

"Good Night, Alice ..", Mina muttered and had to smile again.

"Good Night .." Alice repeated before getting out of the car and disappearing into the green house. And Mina couldn't help but stare after her.

In her mind, for whatever reason, she was back on the day the two of you had met in the flower shop where you had been working at the time. Even then, she had wanted to smile all the time.

When Mina finally stood in front of the house for a few minutes and finally decided to go home, she felt nothing but guilty feelings and she did not know who these feelings were for: Alice, because Mina had let her go or you, because she felt exactly the same  things right now as she did when you and Mina first met.

----------------------

It was Saturday evening and Alice was on her way to the house of the interesting woman she had met in person a few days ago. Somewhere she had a guilty conscience, as it was already 10 p.m. and it was probably impolite to disturb Mina so late, but she really wanted to see Wilhemina again and at the same time she really wanted to get to know you.

She stepped onto the site of your house and hesitantly raised her hand to the bell before finally pressing her finger against the little button.

When two minutes later still nothing had moved, Alice actually wanted to turn around and go home, but then she remembered that Mina probably needed longer due to her stick and that's why she stayed. And actually a few seconds later an angry looking Mina opened the door for her.

When Alice saw Mina's angry look, she was afraid for a moment that she had more than just disturbed, but when Mina recognized her, her look softened.

"Alice .." Mina uttered happily and Alice could see the woman in front of her trying to suppress a smile, which she failed.

"Uhm..I hope I'm not bothering .." Alice gave Mina, who quickly shook her head, a bright smile.

"No .." said the woman, her face serious again. "How can I help you?"

"Uhm well, I've got something for your girlfriend .." Alice muttered as she reached into her pocket to get the book out before she passed it to Mina.

"I saw on Thursday that your friend had checked out the first part .. I thought she might want to read the second part too .. It doesn't exist in the library .."

"Oh that's nice ..", Mina picked up the book.

"But unfortunately she's not at home all weekend because of a seminar .."

Alice frowned

"Are you sure you're the one who transfers his girlfriend because of work?" She asked and watched Mina just shake her head.

"I think you have a completely wrong picture of her ..", Mina muttered and chewed her lower lip.

"Isn't that important either, do you want to come in?"

"Sure .." Alice nodded quickly and started smiling again.

When Mina led Alice into the living room, Alice couldn't help but be impressed. The walls of the great room were lined up with full bookshelves sorted in alphabetical order. A large chandelier hung from the ceiling and was not switched on because a fire was burning in a large marble fireplace. In the middle of the room was a large dark red carpet on which a dark wing chair, a couch made of the same dark fabric and a square wooden table with short table legs stood.

Alice's gaze caught on the wing chair Mina had obviously been sitting in, before Alice rang the bell. A blanket lay untidy on the seat, covered with an open book and on the table was a half-empty glass with red wine. On the edge of the glass Alice could see traces of Mina's dark lipstick.

"Excuse the chaos, please ..", she heard Mina say behind her. Alice let out a low snort.

"Chaos .." she repeated mumbling and turned to Mina. Except for the few things on the wing chair, the house seemed to have been furnished down to the last detail.

"Do you drink wine?" Asked Mina, clutching her stick with both hands.

"Sure." Alice replied curtly.

"Red or white?"

"White, please ..".

"Well, then wait here for a moment ..", Mina said before turning around to leave the room.

Alice looked after the woman briefly before going to the dark sofa to sit on it. She sat there for a moment, but then the pictures on the mantelpiece caught her eye and she got up again to walk to the fireplace to take a closer look at the pictures.

All of the pictures showed Mina and a woman Alice was unfamiliar with, but Alice was smart enough to say that it was you, Mina's girlfriend.

And she noticed that Mina was right when she said Alice had the wrong picture of you. You didn't see at all like someone that could be impatient or strict. All these pictures showed you laughing honestly, with a cocky twinkle in your eyes. And of course Mina, who, as always, tried to suppress her smile. Alice grinned at the thought.

Each picture showed a different moment, presumably dates or vacations and all in one, Alice thought that you and Mina looked cute together, at least in the photos.

"So you've already discovered Y / N's altar .." mumbled Mina, who suddenly appeared next to Alice.

"Oh yes .. It's cute ..", Alice said and took the glass of white wine, which Mina held out to her before she mumbled a little "thank you".

"I think it's rather cheesy, but it was her idea ..", Mina stared critically at the pictures and for a few seconds neither said anything.

"She's pretty .." Alice finally remarked and Mina just nodded.

"She is.."

Alice's gaze wandered carefully from the pictures to Mina, who was staring sadly down at the pictures.

"You know, I think this is what I like the most .." she suddenly mumbled and tapped an actually inconspicuous picture with her finger. It showed you both in your winter coats squinting your eyes against the flash of the selfie camera. It was also pretty blurry.

"I know it's nothing special .." Mina explained. "But the moment behind it was special ... It was New Year's Eve last year and shortly before midnight we climbed onto the roof of the skyscraper in which she lived at the time, to watch the fireworks from there. I remember exactly how she was angry when I forced her to come on the roof with me .. it was pretty cold ..

But I wanted it to be special when I propose to her .. "

Alice's eyes widened.

"Are you engaged?"

Mina shook her head and smiled sadly.

"We were engaged .. but she broke off the engagement three months ago until .. until things were settled .. You already know how complicated everything is at the moment .."

Alice looked worriedly into Mina's sad eyes before slowly nodding.

"I understand .." she said softly.

"You know, I really love her, but it's just so weird .." Mina pinched the bridge of her nose. "I met her a couple of years ago in the flower shop she worked and earned next to nothing and actually had a shitty life, and now she's been working as a professor for a college for a few months and is finally happy with that... and that is great, don't get me wrong, but we hardly have no time for each other, because now she also has to work long hours ... and it's like she pretends that it's all my fault .. "

"I'm sorry .." Alice muttered before stretching out her arms and pulling the woman into a hug. Alice felt that Mina was uncomfortable when she lay tense in her arms, but when she wanted to withdraw, Mina quickly put her arms around Alice and hugged her back. Alice put her head on Mina's shoulder and inhaled the woman's lavender perfume. They stayed that way for a few minutes, until Mina finally cleared her throat and withdrew.

"M'sorry .." she muttered without looking at Alice and Alice could see the tear marks on her face.

"We shouldn't talk about this anymore .."

Alice nodded quickly. "If I got too close to you, I'm sorry .. "

She followed Mina, who sat down on the couch and sat with enough space next to her.

"Now that you've heard my shit, I'd love to hear yours .." Mina said, giving Alice a subtle sideways look. Alice blinked a few times and thought about it for a moment. Actually, she didn't really know the woman and a divorce is not really a pleasant topic for an evening like this, but a few seconds ago Mina had stood in her arms and cried, so what was wrong with it?

"Uhm .. so I've been divorced for 2 months ..", she began and for the next two hours she told Mina the whole story with Phyllis Schlafly, the E.R.A. and that Houston had somehow opened her eyes and she'd been working on directory assistance ever since. She told Mina about her children and that she couldn't believe she was a grandma. And then she told her about Buck and that for a few years she had wondered if what she had with him was really what she wanted the rest of her life to be.

To be honest, Alice wouldn't normally have been so talkative if it wasn't because of the alcohol. She usually didn't drink, so a glass of Mina's expensive white wine was enough to get her drunk.

"You know, I only noticed now how bad that asshole was in bed ..." she laughed out loud and held onto Mina's thigh. "Well in any case our house belongs to him and I have to live with my daughter .."

Mina, who was just as sober as she was a few hours earlier, might have been a little overwhelmed by Alice's drunkenness, but somehow she found it incredibly cute.

"I'm sorry .." she muttered and Alice missed the worried look the woman was giving her.

"Yikes .." Alice suddenly made as she stared intently at the clock on the wall.

"Am I wrong or is it 14 minutes past midnight?"

Mina was shocked at her words and had to find out that it was actually that late.

"I should call your daughter, then she can pick you up ..".

"Oh let Evangeline sleep .." Alice waved her off.

"I can just sleep with you .. you know I like you, you're nice to me and don't treat me like the failure that I am. Even if you were pretty mean to me on the phone ..".

Alice grinned crookedly before leaning forward and dropping her head into Mina's lap. Mina winced and immediately got up to let Alice rudely fall back on the sofa. The drunk woman let out a low wail and looked reproachfully up at Mina.

"We should put you to bed .." she mumbled and pulled Alice into an upright position before she gently grabbed her arm and pulled her up the stairs with her.

"Uhm .. this is the guest room ...", Mina muttered as they stood in the door frame of the room. Alice stared into the beautifully decorated guest room, which was so much better than the sofa she'd slept on for months. But it wasn't what she wanted.

"You know, I can sleep with you..", she remarked and looked carefully at Mina, who seemed frozen.

"Okay .." Mina finally said before stepping out of the doorway and leading Alice into your bedroom.

A large king-size bed stood with its head against the wall and filled most of the room. One side of the bed faced the door. Alice' gaze ran to the bedside cabinet on this side of the bed and could see reading glasses, a pill box and a tube of some kind of cream next to a small lamp. She suspected that Mina slept here. The other nightstand was a lot messier. Unused kleenex were piled on top of each other while a pair of gold earrings lay on the lamp stand. On one corner of the cupboard was an empty glass, but it was definitely used. And then there was a big black hairbrush and either it was Mina's red hair that was caught in it or you had the same hair color as your girlfriend, which Alice found unlikely. On the wall next to this side of the bed was a large painting with some flowers on it. Alice's eyes wandered to a large ground plant that stood in the corner of the room. She noticed that she had seen beautiful flowers all over the house and she remembered Mina saying that you had once worked in a flower shop.

All in all it was a nice bedroom, but Alice only saw the best part when she had stepped completely into the room:

On the wall opposite the foot of the bed was a huge picture window, which allowed a view of the neighborhood and the beautiful night sky. That was the advantage if you didn't live in the city. Alice couldn't help but grin than her eyesremained hanging on the black grand piano, which crowned the bedroom on top of everything else.

"A piano in the bedroom?", She turned to Mina, grinning, who turned red for whatever reason.

"Y / N can play the piano and when I gave this one to her, she wanted it to be here ..", Mina explained and nervously began tapping the floor with her stick to a random rhythm.

"It's pretty cheesy, but you should hear her play ...".

Alice nodded quickly and put on a neutral expression again when she realized that Mina didn't like her grin.

"I imagine it would be nice to wake up in the morning and then hear the piano .." she muttered and looked back at the piano.

"Anyway ..", Mina said and held her stick tighter again.

"We're about the same size, you can have my nightgown if you want ..".

Alice turned back to her and gave the woman a grateful smile.

"That would be nice..".

Mina only nodded shortly before she left the room, only to come back a minute later in a lavender nightgown.

"I'm going to change in the bathroom while you can do this here ..", she explained as Alice took the nightgown and mumbled a little "thank you".

And less than 5 minutes later Alice, who was actually still drunk, was lying in bed next to a completely stranger and, like Mina, stared at the ceiling in silence. And yet she would have preferred nowhere and it was the first evening in weeks that she could fall asleep without any worries.

---------------------

Contrary to Mina's guess, the next morning hadn't been weird at all. Actually nothing special had happened, but Mina had been worried about Alice's drunkenness, but the woman had been kind as always.

And while everything was fine between Alice and her, she worried about what was between her and you. She felt incredibly guilty and could never have told you that a strange woman had slept in your bed. Mina knew that Alice was way too innocent to think anything about it when she and Mina shared the bed, but you didn't know Alice and you would never understand.

Miss Venable couldn't deny that the brunette had turned her head. Alice was so gentle, it was almost impossible to feel uncomfortable in her presence and Mina finally had someone who understood her and who showed her compassion.

And when you came home on Sunday night and she pushed you right against your front door to kiss you passionately, she did that not only to show you how much she had missed you, but also to prove to herself that she still loved you . Because she did, but what she felt when she saw Alice confused her feelings and it scared her.

It was Thursday afternoon and Mina was on her way home. She had tried again and again over the past few days to show you how much she loved you, but for whatever reason, that only made it worse. At least you just seemed to get a little bit more bitter every day, and she couldn't explain why.

Mina let out an aggressive growl when she sounded the horn because the light turned green and the idiot in front of her stopped driving.

She had got out of work late and now had to hurry to get home, even if she didn't really want to go there. You'd only be disappointed again because she was late again.

Nervously, she drummed her fingers on the steering wheel as she drove home as fast as she could. She was almost in your street when she spotted none other than Alice on the pedestrian path and automatically her bad mood had flown away. Mina stopped next to Alice on the side of the road before pulling down the passenger door window to see Alice's surprised face.

"Jesus Mina .." Alice exclaimed, clutching her chest.

Mina raised an eyebrow and grinned.

"I thought church mice dont swear ..".

"Actually, I don't swear either .." Alice stammered. "But do you have any idea how scary it is when someone pulls up their car next to you?"

"So am I someone then?"

"No .. but .. you know what I mean ..".

Mina nodded curtly before leaning forward to open the passenger door.

"I guess, you want to go home?"

"Oh yes ..", Alice smiled gratefully at Mina before climbing into the car.

"So how are you Mina?" Alice asked after they had driven for a few minutes.

"M'fine ..", Mina mumbled and was well aware that she was lying.

"Good to hear .." Alice said, sounding in as good a mood as ever.

"How did Y / N find the book?"

Fuck.

Mina bit her lip.

"So uhm..I didn't give it to her..Y / N doesnt know you were with me .. "

"Oh ..", uttered the woman next to her and didn't sound that happy anymore.

"I may not be allowed to interfere, but I think you should talk to her .."

"About what?" Mina frowned.

"About how you feel .. Tell Y / N that you feel misunderstood and make it clear to her that it is not your fault ..".

Mina didn't answer and concentrated on driving again.

"You know, communication is the most important thing in a relationship, so talk to her, I think that might help .."

Great, thought Mina and bit the inside of her cheek. Talking about feelings, that was exactly her thing.

She stopped in silence next to Alice's daughter's green house.

"Thanks, Mina ..", Alice mumbled and wanted to open the car door to get out, but Mina stopped her by locking the whole car.

Alice turned to her in confusion before Mina grabbed her by the collar of her blouse, pulled her close and pressed her lips against Alice's.

Alice let out a shocked whimper and Mina immediately withdrew.

For a few seconds both women stared at each other. Alice looked totally overwhelmed and horrified, while Mina slowly realized what she had just done.

Without a word she opened the car doors and not a second later Alice jumped out of the car before running into the house.

A few minutes passed and Mina didn't move an inch. She stared at the street in front of her, trying to understand what had just happened.

All she wanted was to solve the problems between you and her and now she had kissed another woman. Damn it.

She let out a loud scream and hit the steering wheel before leaning forward to lean her forehead against it. A few more minutes passed while she cried against the leather. She hated being so emotional, right now when so many feelings were boiling in her at the same time and she couldn't define all of these things.

After she had calmed down a bit, she took a few deep breaths before starting the car and driving home.

"I'm home, baby .." she called in a thin voice after entering your house.

"Oh, finally ..", she heard you sigh before you appeared in the hallway. Your usual smile faded when you saw her and you frowned.

"What?" Mina asked nervously and chewed her lower lip.

"You have lipstick on your face ..", your voice sounded dark and made Mina nervous.

"Oh .. it must be smeared .." she said and smiled shakily.

"This is not your lipstick .."

Mina's smile froze and she stared at you.

"So you're really having an affair .." you growled and she could see tears glistening in your eyes.

"What the- Y / N..No ..", Mina's voice faltered as she watched you turn around and pointed with your finger to follow you before you led her into your study.

"If you're not having an affair, what is that ..", you opened one of your desk drawers and put a white lace bra on it.

"I found it under our bed and it can't be yours .. you're not wearing white underwear .."

Mina stared at Alice's bra hanging on your finger.

"Okay, how long?", You looked at her piercingly.

"I uhm- We dont-" Mina struggled for words and clung to her cane.

"You just can't be serious .." you yelled. "All I want is your affection and while I give everything to hang out with you, you fuck someone else?"

"I'm not having an affair, Y / N ..", Mina tried to calm you down and held up a hand.

"Oh, then explain to me why I find strange underwear under our bed and why your face is such a mess .. You know, you could have at least tried to hide the whole thing ..".

"Please let me explain ..", Mina chewed her lower lip and briefly considered what to say.

"Well I know you from the directory assistance ..-"

"Ohh, phone sex..",  you interrupted her and raised an eyebrow.

"What the hell, no y / n ..", Mina hissed.

"It turned out that she lives in the neighborhood and then she was here on Saturday and slept here, more not .."

"More not? Are you kidding me?", You spat and ran your hair through. "You let this stranger sleep in my bed and you don't tell me about it? .."

Mina didn't know how to answer it, so she just kept silent.

"Did you have sex?" You asked as you crossed your arms and chewed your lower lip.

"She never could, she-"

"Okay, I'll ask differently ..", you pinched the bridge of your nose.

"Did you want to have sex with her?"

Mina stared at you with wide eyes. In her mind she traveled back to Saturday night when she had been lying in bed next to Alice and staring at the ceiling. She remembered it well, how disgustedt she was of herself, but all she wanted to do at the moment was bend over the innocent woman to do the dirtiest things to her. Things Alice didn't even dare to dream of. All she wanted was to hear the desperate whimpering of the women and how she shouted her name.

But Mina could never have done that, partly because her loyalty was yours and partly because Alice was far too innocent for something like that.

"Wow .." you mumbled when she didn't answer.

"And then that bitch kissed you today ...?"

"Don't call her that ..", Mina defended Alice. "And besides, I kissed her ..".

"Oh..That's even better ..." you screamed as tears ran from your eyes.

"Congratulations Wilhemina, something like that is called an affair ..".

Angrily you threw the bra at Mina before you ran past her back into the hallway. Mina followed you and watched sadly as you packed your handbag with simple things.

"I'm going to see my mother .." you explained without looking at her while you put on your jacket. "I have to think about a few things ... I have no idea how long I'll be gone ... I also have no idea if I'll ever come back ...".

That was the last thing you said before you ran out of your house and left her with all the guilt.

-----------------------

You spent three weeks with your mother. Three long weeks of thinking about everything that had happened. You loved Mina so much, and the fact that there was probably someone else almost killed you. And actually you hadn't meant to come back to her, no matter that all your things were still in her house, but you were too scared that you would then have to see how she got over you and went on with her life.

After all, it was your mother who persuaded you to go to Mina to talk to her.

And now you stood in front of the door of your house and at least from the outside it looked exactly as you had left it. You bravely raised your hand to the door to knock gently on it.

And when Mina opened the door a minute later, you couldn't help but stare at her. You thought you looked like shit, but Mina topped it all. The actually proud woman was just a pile of misery when she opened the door for you that day. The red hair curled untidily over the fabric of her pajamas as she trembled on her stick. She was obviously in pain and probably hadn't taken her pills, something you usually reminded her of. You looked carefully into her face, which seemed even paler than usual, and noticed how she squinted her eyes against the sunlight, she didn't seem to have left the house for a long time.

For a moment you both stared at each other and you felt guilt creep up inside you.

"Can I come in?" You finally asked and looked carefully into her cloudy eyes that were staring down at you. Mina nodded slowly.

"It's your home ..." she muttered before stepping out of the doorway and hobbling into the living room. Without hesitation you ran after her after the door had closed behind you. You sat down next to Mina, who was staring into the empty fireplace, on the couch and also stared at the fireplace, but your attention was focused on the photos on the mantelpiece.

"You didn't take your pills .." you mumbled and she just hummed in agreement.

"..uhm, how are you?" you tried again before carefully looking at her from the side.

"M'great .." she muttered.

"Okay.."

"And how are you?" She asked while she was still staring into the fireplace.

"I'm great too."

Mina snorted.

"So we're both liars."

You ignored her comment and got to the real reason you came.

"Okay Mina, uhm i dont know- So about this woman .. I don't know what you had or just didn't have with her ..-"

"I had nothing with her ..", she interrupted you with a growl.

"You understand that I can understand that pretty badly?", You bit your lower lip and watched as Mina shook her head.

"I think you should get to know her .." she muttered and you frowned.

"So are you still in contact with her?"

Mina shrugged her shoulders.

"You should get to know her," she repeated.

"Okay .." you raised both hands in surrender. "Tell me when and where and I'll be there ..".

"Are you coming home then?" She whispered as she finally turned away from the fireplace and her injured eyes met yours.

"I .. I don't know ..", you stammered. "Please let me get to know this woman first .."

Mina nodded just before she got up and left the living room.

"What are you doing?" You called after her, confused.

"I'll call her .. "she muttered.

Your eyes widened.

"She's not coming here now, is she?"

"No ..", Mina called from the hallway. You didn't answer and after a few seconds you heard her talking softly to someone before she came back into the living room and stood in the doorway.

"You will meet her tomorrow in the café next to the library ..", she explained.

"Tomorrow I have to work late .."

"I know .." she said. "That's why you don't meet until 6 pm .."

"Okay .." you nodded briefly and stared at her for a few seconds.

"Uhm, I actually wanted to take some clothes with me .. For three weeks I've had to wear the shit my mother still had from me .."

"It's your home..", Mina replied shortly as she again clutched her stick with both hands.

You jumped up from the sofa to run past her up the stairs. In your dressing room you quickly packed a few clothes in an old sports bag before you turned around and actually wanted to go again, but then the white bra of this woman caught your eye, which was lost in the window sill. You knew stuffing that stupid thing in your gym bag might not be a good idea, but you would do anything to break the owner of this bra, for something to do with your girlfriend.

You ran back down the stairs where Mina was waiting for you in the hallway.

"I should go now .." you muttered as she stared at you expectantly. She nodded sadly.

"Uhm..Can I hug you?" She asked quietly and looked at you carefully.

"uh..of course ..", you nodded slowly before suddenly finding yourself in her arms again. She hugged you so tight that you were afraid you would suffocate. Her red hair tickled your face and for the first time in three weeks you could inhale her lavender perfume while she clung to you like her life depended on it.

"I am so sorry ..", she whispered and you swallowed when you felt guilty again.

"I should go now .." you repeated and withdrew from her arms.

She just nodded before you stumbled to the front door.

"Uhm..Y / N ..", she called after you when you were already out the door. You turned back to her and looked at her questioningly.

"Yes?"

"Alice didn't do anything wrong, so please don't kill her tomorrow ..".

You nodded just before turning to go to your car.

Alice.

--------------

"Damn .." you cursed as you nervously stared at your watch.

18:23

You parked your car in the library parking lot and walked briskly to the café.

Your gaze wandered through the almost empty room. Two men were sitting at a table and playing chess, an old woman was sitting in a corner and drinking coffee, and then your gaze was fixed on the graceful figure of a woman who was sitting with her back turned to you. It has to be her, you thought as you stared at her hazel hair curled up on a pastel colored blouse.

You got a little nervous when you approached her from behind.

"Uhm..Alice ..?" You asked and the woman winced slightly before turning to you and staring into her friendly eyes.

"You must be Y / N .." she said with a bright smile and got up.

"Uhm..ja .." you mumbled with a frown before you sat down across from her.

"I'm sorry ..I'm late .."

"Oh its okay .." Alice waved her hand before she sat down again. "Mina told me about your work .."

"Did she?", You looked at her confused and she just hummed in agreement.

You used the next few seconds to take in the woman in front of you and understood what Mina had meant. Alice looked so harmless and didn't fall into the category of the horny neighbor slut at all.

You cleared your throat and pointed with your index finger at the cup in front of you.

"What's this?"

"Tea," Alice said curtly. "She told me that you drink tea .."

The furrow on your forehead only got a little deeper as you pulled your eyebrows together a little further.

"She seems to have told you a lot about me .."

"I also know that you play the piano .." Alice replied, sounding kind of proud.

"She had to explain the piano in our bedroom .." you growled darkly as you remembered that this woman had slept in your bed.

"Y / N, she loves you .." she said and looked at you piercingly.

"I'm not sure about this.."

"Okay .." Alice sighed before starting to tell you the whole story from her point of view. How Mina had called her directory assistance late at night, how they met by chance in the library and how she ended up at your home on Saturday evening.

You listened to her attentively without interrupting her and with everyoneSentence made you feel a little worse because everything she said made sense.

"You must know, I never kissed a woman before and- you know ..." Alice muttered, staring at the table.

"And I thought it was a sin all my life and when Mina kissed me I wasn't really happy at first. You know, I was with her on a Tuesday two weeks ago to talk to her about it and she was really sad..- "

"Did she tell you she loves you?" You interrupt her.

"She-" Alice's voice faltered. "She apologized and said she was confused .."

You stared at her in silence.

"I don't want to offend you, Y / N, but Mina feels totally misunderstood by you .. She tries to do everything right and you reject her .. As if it was her fault that she has to work so hard .. And even if she doesn't seem like anyone that gets involved with something like that, she feels totally terrible about it all .. You didn't see how she cried when I was with her that Tuesday .. "

You looked at Alice sadly when you understood what she meant.

"Damn I'm such an idiot .." you muttered, rubbing your hair.

"There's something else, Y / N .." Alice sat up straight before continuing.

"When I was with her on Tuesday, I kissed her again ..".

Her words made you freeze.

"You did what?"

"You already understand me .." Alice said, looking at each other nervously.

"Did she kiss you or did you kiss her?"

"I kissed her."

"Okay .." you frowned.

"She loves you .." Alice repeated, putting her hand on yours.

Tears stung your eyes.

"But she loves you too ..", you croaked as you felt warm tears running down your face. Alice reached out her hand to wipe the tears from your face.

"Maybe .." she said softly. "But you mustn't be mad at her for that, it's not her fault .. Mina and I don't have an affair or anything, she loves you too much for that .."

"And do you love her?"

Alice thought for a few seconds before answering.

"I don't know to be honest .. This is all new to me, if you get what I mean .."

You nodded slowly and thought for a moment about everything she had just told you.

"I uhm .. thanks for trying to explain everything to me .." you finally said.

The woman in front of you smiled gently before taking her hand back.

"I hope you don't hate me now or anything.."

"Oh no!" You shouted loudly. "You are really kind .."

"Thank you," Alice muttered, her eyes shining a little more.

You stared at her for another moment and you could totally understand that Mina found this little sunshine attractive.

"Uhm by the way .." you started and reached into your handbag.

"I uhm .. I brought your bra .."

You put the bra on the table and pushed it over to the woman.

"Thank you .." Alice mumbled embarrassed and blushed, which made you grin.

She was really cute.

And that was your first "date" with Alice. Although one would call this educational talk less than a date. That same evening you drove back home and by home you meant Mina and not your mother's house.

The following months were more than overwhelming for you, Mina and Alice. Mina and you both applied for less working time at your work, which you also received and you had more time for each other.

That wasn't what overwhelmed you so much, the problem was, that it was pretty difficult for all 3 of you to come to terms with how you felt about each other.

After all, Mina got along best with it because she was the one of you who had been confronted with it the longest.

For her sake you accepted her love for Alice and began to meet the brunette more often and at some point you had to find out that you too were hopelessly in love with Alice.

Alice struggled with it though. The mere fact that she was in love with one woman scared her and then there were two. It was pretty hard for her to put aside all of her lesbian advantages and what her church said about you. Fortunately, Alice's children had different opinions and were glad that their mother was happy again after the divorce.

You and Mina were a little afraid of Alice's extended family, but they had all been nice to you and there was almost nothing better for you than to take care of Alice's grandchildren.

It took a while, but finally Alice also managed to get rid of her inhibitions and give herself completely to you.

And sometimes when you wake up between the two of them, when Mina had her arms wrapped around you from behind and when Alice was cuddled with her head to your chest and you were wondering how all this was even possible, you were probably the happiest person on earth at the same time.

And all you needed for that was the little sunshine in your arms while the red hair of your beautiful protector tickled your face.

[heyitsyn]

Keeping Up With Seijoh Ep. 4

a/n: uwuwuwuwu @animesportboys​ and i were just talking about this and my heart was just bursting at this thought 😭

for more seijoh content, check this masterlist out!

also requests are currently closed right now since i have like nearly 30 to finish so please be patient with me and wait for me to finish it all and until then i can open them up again. however, dont stop sending me cute stuff okay?  🥺

summary: its the time of the month for seijoh’s manager 🥺

@ yn when shes extra moody and mean during that time and does this every time she hears anything even come out of the boys’ mouth

oh dear

so basically

it’s,,,,,, a natural thing that most girls go through every month for more than half of their lives and its absolutely D R E A D F U L

the boys ofc knew what the hell a period was bc hello health class so they knew you would become this,,, other version of yourself

youd be moodier, childish, and easy to annoy and snap to everyone

but you would quickly realize how you’re acting then be all regretful and teary and cry easily and then youd forget about it then start the cycle again

you’d stick your tongue out at them and tease them mercilessly, making them run even more laps and pushing them harder

‘I SEE THOSE ARMS SHAKING, IWAIZUMI HAJIME. ADD 15 MORE TO THAT ROUTINE’

‘WHAT?!’

‘IF I SEE YOU EVEN A STEP BEHIND KINDAICHI, YOU WILL BE RUNNING 8 MORE LAPS KUNIMI’

‘NOO!!!!’

‘CHECK YOURSELF OUT ONE MORE TIME, YAHABA, I WILL GOUGE OUT YOUR EYES’

‘HAVE MERCY!!!!’

dear god they hated it

when it was time, they would protect themselves and work even harder and be more perfect to make sure you couldnt see their faults and point them out and try and kill them

it was like war for everyone

but they didnt know the exact date it started so they didnt really know when to start preparing for war until it came

this time, you didnt either

you didnt even know you were starting as you were extra busy booking the buses for away comps and collecting and emailing teachers for any missed homeworks for the team

so when it did start,,,

oh dear part 2

it wasnt really something you found out when you woke up that morning but you noticed you must be getting close since you were feeling extra cranky and you havent even been awake for more than an hour

nothing really happened throughout the day so you were just thinking that you didnt get enough sleep last night so you were just tired and wanted to sleep

but then it happened

you were standing next to iwa, reviewing his spike percentages when you shifted your weight to the other leg and then your eyes widened

your water broke

i saw this tiktok of this one girl and she was about to start filming with her friend when her eyes widened and her friend knew immediately and her caption was ‘my water broke’

iwa was worried as heck on to what was going on with you and even followed your gaze to see it on the wall and nothing out of the ordinary

‘y/n?’

‘oh god’

you mumbled and you wanted to run but you were too scared that you leaked and probably have an obvious redness on your white track pants

yep it def was your time bc you felt tears welling up in your eyes and you sniffled, embarrassed and upset for this to happen now, of all times

then oikawa tooru bursted through the doors

iwa, taking his eyes off of you and to the captain, started to yell at him until he noticed the brunette’s flushed face and panting form, hunched over as he gripped on the door handle with the plastic bag

you, too busy trying to think of a way to get out of there like deciding to waddle or to just crawl, didnt see oikawa as he approached you

the team paused and watched as he took a black hoodie from the plastic bag and wrapped it around your waist

‘hmm, y/n-chan, better get dressed so we can go now’

he hummed and you snapped out of your panic and looked up at him with watery eyes

‘oikawa-san’

you whispered and he nodded, eyes knowing what was going on

‘coach, theres a planetarium special tonight’

oikawa shouted without tearing his gaze away from you and coach irihata instantly knew, knowing the code that oikawa came up with when you became a part of the family team

the elder coach made a noise of agreement and oikawa didnt wait to up and carry you in his arms and waved to the team while pushing your head in his chest so you can hide

‘work hard everyone!’

‘oi, shittykawa! what the hell-!’

but an intense side-eye from his best friend shut him up and he knew something happened so he didnt say anything since he trusts oikawa to fix it

‘i trust you will take care of them, iwa-chan’

iwaizumi nodded firmly before shouting to resume back to practice and he himself went back to the line for spikes

you were carried to the bathroom so you could change into your emergency undies and pad and after you did your business, oikawa noticed you uncomfortably waddling towards him so he took you back into his arms

oikawa continued to carry you like his bride down the street towards an unknown destination, humming a children’s show tune that takeru loved to watch, while you maintained curled around yourself, partly due to the shame but also from the pain in your abdomen

you wiped the few stray tears that spilled past your eyes and oikawa chuckled when he noticed you aggressively wipe them off

‘hmm, y/n-chan, you shouldnt do that to yourself. it irritates your eyes and the skin around it so gently dab it next time, kay?’

you nodded, burrowing back to his chest and breathing in his scent

french toast

he smelled like french toast as the smell of caramel and vanilla wafted into your nose

‘howd you know’

you mumbled against the fabric of his jacket

oikawa stopped his humming and replaced it with a chuckle

‘oh, y/n-chan. oikawa-san is a reliable senpai, dont you know? i got a tracker! just for you!’

he answered and your eyes moved from his arm to his smile and you gripped his jacket tighter, fingers curled around it as if it was your lifeline

‘thank you, oikawa-san’

your words of appreciation made oikawa’s heart thump and he faltered a little, blush creeping up his neck, but he fought it down, covering it up with a smirk

‘you should be, y/n-chan! girls would kill to be you right now!’

you rolled your eyes at the return of his cocky attitude but you knew better

the real oikawa tooru was under that mask

turns out, he carried you to his home as his house was the closest while yours had to be taken by a bus

thankfully his parents were out and his sister and nephew were in a trip in tokyo that you had the house to yourselves without anyone asking questions that might make you uncomfortable and them misunderstand

he shut the door with his foot and made his way up the stairs with ease, his strength truly impressing you at that moment, before settling you down on his bed

it wasnt even on purpose but you curled yourself on his blanket, head buried in his pillow

his heart combusted and tooru had to look away or else he wouldve jumped on you and coddled you forever

instead, he quickly ran over and knelt down under his desk to reach for the box that he has prepared for you

‘y/n-chan, i never knew your pattern until last month so i was able to prepare for you now’

you looked up from your position on the bed and sat up enough to see him standing there, grinning with a mint green box

‘wh-what is that?’

you asked and he shuffled over, sitting next to you

‘this, is the y/n care love box! this special box was created by yours truly with everything you want and need during this dreadful week. theres your favorite food, warm socks, coupons you can spend like watching movies and eating ten tubs of ice cream while we talk shit about the boys’

he listed, gripping the box nervously 

‘so? do you like it?’

he looked away from the box and to you but his smile slipped into a panicked one when he saw you silently crying and biting your lip to keep the sobs in

‘y-y/n-chan! i-its okay if y-you dont like it! o-oikawa-san can-’

‘no!’

you cut him off and lunged to hug him with all your might

hehe all might

E A T   T H I S

‘i love you so much, oikawa-san! so much! thank you!’

you sobbed into his neck and he tightly hugged you back, lifting you so you could comfortably sit on his lap straddle him if you want me to be straight forward

oikawa gently moved so he was leaning against the wall that his bed was pressed against while you were pressed against his warmth

his fingers were drawing small circles on your back and whispering corny jokes or puns that made you giggle and laugh and occassionally, he would kiss your nose and you would whine at the ticklish feeling

eyes fleeting around the room, your eyes settled back on the box and you reached out, wanting to grab it until oikawa beat you to it and snatched it for you then placed it on your hold

‘whats inside, oikawa-san?’

you cutely mumbled, sitting comfortably back on his thighs so you could open the box in front of you

oikawa laughed

‘just open it and figure it out yourself, y/n-chan’

you pouted at his tease but smiled widely when you revealed the contents inside

‘oikawa-san!’

his eyes followed your surprised expression and his hands gripped your waist

‘you like it?’

he whispered and you nodded, looking back up at him and kissing his cheek, his 

‘youre so sweet, oikawa-san! like-like this candy bar! howd you know i like this?’

you held up the treat and he shrugged

‘i keep seeing you get it whenever we go to the store’

you continued to sift through the things, seeing a dvd of your favorite movie, a f/c heating pad, a note that said your favorite ice cream was in the fridge, a bag of your favorite chips, fluffy socks, the goodies

you didnt even notice yourself crying again, only realizing it when there were wet spots beneath you

oikawa saw this and he quickly but gently put the box to the side and cradled your face with both of his hands, softly wiping the tears away with his thumbs

‘aw, dont cry, my little baby. princesses should never cry’

you sniffled and choked a laugh

‘hah, n-not a baby. j-just hor-monal’

you complained and oikawa snickered but shook his head then kissed your nose again

‘youre my baby’

you didnt have it in you to complain so you went back to snuggling into him

oikawa squeezed you and went back to drawing the circles on your back and he felt you relax into his touch and slump against his form, slowly starting to snore

your head rested on his shoulder and he turned slightly to watch your eyes flutter and nose scrunch when a strand of your hair fell on it

his heart continued to beat faster and faster and it showed by the way his fingers shook as he carefully lifted the hair away from you

he slowly bent down to give you a kiss on the forehead before laying you down to sleep more comfortably

‘good night, princess’

he sweetly placed a last kiss on your cheek before getting up to go prepare your heating pad for when you wake up

the next few days were possibly the best period days youve ever had

maybe because it was oikawa telling the team that you were in,,,,, satan’s domain currently and they should be careful with you so they tried their best to lift the weight and burden off of your shoulders

however,,

the next day after the incident,,,

they still didnt know what was wrong with you and oikawa forgot to text the gc about your condition so they were still unknowing

like today

during your classes, you were feeling off, almost nauseous but eating little bits of your chocolate treats were helping you get through until lunch

ofc kunimi noticed bc hellow he sits next to you and he doesnt pay attention during class so hes been watching you sneak little bites so the teacher doesnt see and ducking under your book

he was just amused with the way your eyes would widen if you thought the teacher caught you

kindaichi and kunimi and you usually ate lunch together at your classroom since you three only got to hang out as first years during lunch

so they know you usually have a bento with you and have a general idea of how much you eat

and kunimi thought since you ate all those chocolates earlier, you wouldnt eat as much food but then he saw you scarf down your bento, eat 2 more bags of chips and was finishing last chocolate bar

kindaichi,,,, wasnt even finished with his own bento and was watching you, amazed, at how easily you ate all of it

they didnt say anything since they thought you just didnt eat dinner last night but even during the walk towards the gym for after school practice, you were complaining that you were hungry and was eating another chocolate bar

they thought something was truly wrong bc you were eating so much more than usual

kunimi watched you chew on it as you opened the gym door and still ate even when you were talking to mattsun about his jump height

‘man, you sure are hungry, aren’t you, y/n? thats like your fifth chocolate bar today’

kunimi teased, grabbing a ball to spike but he froze, seeing you with the coldest and angriest look hes ever seen

you blinked at him, grip tightening on the treat, and mattsun slowly backing away from you

you advanced towards the blep boy, treat already forgotten and shoved to be held by mattsun 

despite your shorter height than kunimi, he trembled slightly as you looked up at him

‘are you calling me fat, kunimi? are you? am i fat? do you think im ugly? im a piggie?’

you ranted and slowly started crying, making kunimi frantically scramble to stop you before the other upperclassmen see or worse, oikawa-san

‘y/n-wait-no!-um’

‘y/n-chan?’

kunimi shut his eyes tightly in fear at the deadly sweet voice of his captain and kindaichi and mattsun sent a quick prayer to their fellow teammate before he was going to get killed

‘uh oh, i think we’d have to start looking for a replacement for kunimi’

makki, who just arrived, teased making kindaichi fearfully look at him

‘eh?!’

‘oh, you first years have never seen oikawa mad, have ya? well, you’ll get front seat of it!’

mattsun clapped him in the back making him gulp

you werent sobbing but you were definitely crying, tear tracks quickly being wetted by the numerous amount of tears that fell

kunimi scrambled to his knees and folded himself, forehead resting on the floor by his hands

‘I APOLOGIZE! PLEASE DONT KILL ME! I APOLOGIZE! PLEASE FIND MERCY IN YOURSELF AND FORGIVE ME, Y/N-SAMA!’

it was certainly a sight to see

normally calm and collected and chill and relaxed hippie kunimi begging to be forgiven

oikawa stepped forward but you quickly felt the change of your mood, feeling bad for your boy and scrambling to pull him back up

‘oh kunimi-kun! dont kneel like that! the floor is too hard and might give you knee pain!’

it was like whiplash

iwa stepped in the gym and saw the team’s confused and bewildered expressions and saw you, kunimi, and oikawa and he shook his head

this aint even half of bad as he has seen

oikawa gently took you away from kunimi and held you to him instead, giving you a smile, to which you returned, and looked at kunimi, a deadly glint in his eye

‘what happened, y/n-chan?’

the tone of his voice sent a chill to run down everyone’s spines and even iwa, the boy who’s seen this a handful of times, shivered and nervously watched oikawa, ready to jump in

but you just blinked, completely unaware of the change of atmosphere

‘oh, um, i overreacted. i was eating too much food today and mustve annoyed him or something’

you sheepishly mumbled but oikawa was having none of it

‘no, its fine. youre literally bleeding out as we speak! dont feel the need to validate yourself!’

he lightly scolded while you hung your head low and continued to apologize but he gently bonked your head before scolding you again

the team definitely knew now that you were in that,,,, time and they definitely knew now, especially kunimi, that even if youve seen oikawa mad, youd think that the devil was more merciful than him when it relates to the topic of you

a/n: i swear to GGGOOOOODDDDDD im an oikawa whore who cant seem to stop writing for him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[shhh-no-ones-home]

through the green glass door (*) loki laufeyson x reader

+++++++++ Guess who watched the first Thor movie 😁😁

(*) - leads to smut but it doesnt go all the way. but like, its super suggestive lol

Song: lying is the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off by panic at the disco

@cynic-spirit +++++++++

"do you have any idea what the consequences will be if i get caught?!"

i exclaimed as quietly as possible,  my three friends giggling as they huddled around me.

"y/n, youre the most agile person we know. and we've all been dreaming of the fruit off that tree for ages. please."

Lenore said and i rolled my eyes.

"if i get caught im taking you three down with me."

i said, gripping the tree bark on the outside portion of the wall.

"we believe in you."

she said as i began climbing. i couldnt believe id let them talk me into this. but they were right, we had all been wanting the fruit off this tree for a very long time. it was forbidden to any outside the palace walls. something none of us had ever or would ever have the pleasure of enjoying. until now i suppose.

"im at the top."

i called back down to them still on the ground. they all cheered and clapped, jumping up and down as they giggled. but i wasnt triumphant just yet. i could see the tree, barely touching the branches of the one i was in. just over the garden wall.

"youve got this."

i whispered to myself, stepping as lightly as i possibly could towards the wall. there was a creaking and i paused, taking a deep breath. it was fine. this was fine. so i kept going, jumping onto the top of the garden wall as the edge of the branch snapped. i took a staggered breath, still hidden within lots of leaves. but there, like a light in the distance i could see the golden fruit. i plucked one off the branch, its smell as it got closer becoming sweeter and sweeter.

then i saw another, plucking it too and tossing both to the ground below. there i saw the three of them, rushing over and picking them up. i grabbed another that was close enough to reach and dropped it down, so each of them could have one of their own. they all celebrated with happy noises of content as they devoured them. as i looked back up to grab another fruit i noticed there were none left nearer to me.

"drat."

i complained, seeing one of the golden fruits just past the wall, barely out of reach. i knew i shouldn't be greedy but i went through all this trouble, it would be a shame to not have one for myself. so i stepped further, to the edge of the wall. i found a branch sturdy enough and planted my foot on it. i took one step, then another, and so on until i was nearing the trunk of the tree and the fruit i had seen from the wall.

"finally."

i whispered, plucking it off the branch and sinking my teeth into it. it was just as sweet as it smelled and i was glad i had continued on my journey over the wall. that was at least until i took one wrong step, another branch breaking under me. then it was one branch after another, falling straight on my face in the grass below the tree. i groaned, lifting my head and my eyes going wide. there in front of me was a pair of black leather boots.

"um, i can explain."

i started, looking up and pausing again. there in front of me was the young prince, holding a book in one hand and a pear in the other, looking just as surprised to see me as i was to see him.

"im sure thats one hel of an explanation having dropped from the sky."

he stated and i moved to my knees quickly, bowing in front of him.

"yes, my prince. i am truly sorry."

he laughed and i looked at him confused.

"please, stand."

he said and i did as told, bowing my head.

"i have not seen you before."

"my prince?"

i raised a brow, watching him as he leaned against the tree.

"where do you come from?"

i cleared my throat.

"outside the palace my prince."

he laughed again.

"do you think me an idiot?"

he asked and i stopped breathing.

"of course not, how could you? you are but a peasant."

then i drew my brows.

"now you wait just a minute! i may not be of noble birth but that does not mean you will disrespect me. arrest me, for all i care, but i will not be spoken to like a-"

"relax."

he said and i stopped.

"relax?!"

he shook his head.

"what is your name?"

i opened and closed my mouth a couple times. then i inhaled sharply.

"y/n."

he stood off the tree, tucked the book under his arm, and offered me his hand.

"well y/n, i am of the impression that you are in need of a new dress."

i looked at him funny before looking down at my outfit. i was dirty and my skirt had torn when i fell out of the tree.

"you arent going to arrest me?"

i asked hesitantly and he smiled.

"i am not."

he said and i slowly took his hand.

"my prince i, i dont believe-"

"you dont need to believe, just trust me."

he said and i nodded. i followed him blindly inside, walking openly past the guards up the stairs and down a long glimmering hallway. it didnt necessarily feel right, but something about him made me want to keep walking. to keep following him.

"my prince-"

"call me loki."

he interrupted.

"um, loki, right. uh where are we going?"

he squeezed my hand before pulling me into a room.

"my chambers."

he said and i froze, the door closing behind us. then out of nowhere a woman appeared, bowing her head.

"bring us one of my mothers old dresses. my guest is in need of some new clothes."

he said in a suave tone, the woman walking past me and out the door.

"i dare say, my prince, i am not worthy of wearing the queens garb."

he looked at me and smiled, pulling a chair out from under a small golden table and sitting at it.

"i think she would disagree."

i smiled back in amusement and joined him at the table.

"why are you being so nice to me?"

i asked and watched as he took a drink.

"it has been a long time since someone has been able to get over garden wall and not get caught. i admire that."

i raised a brow.

"so you like that im mischievous?"

i questioned and he smirked.

"exactly."

i made a small noise of disbelief.

"i should have guessed. the midgaurdians call you, what, the god of mischief? it only makes sense you would like someone sneaking into the palace garden."

"my lord."

i heard from the door and both our gaze turned to the girl, holding a blue dress.

"ah yes, a perfect choice."

i watched as he took it from her, shooing her away afterwards. and then he started towards me, making me more curious.

"for the lady."

he said, offering it to me and i smirked at him.

"care to help me put it on?"

i made a face, realizing what i had just asked and almost couldnt believe myself for being so bold. but part of me also didnt regret it. and i couldnt help notice the knowing smile across his face as he led me to his bed. there he laid the dress out and moved to help me.

"a bit intrepid for someone who believed me to want to arrest them."

i looked over his face for a moment.

"theres something about you i cant get off of my mind."

"and that is?"

he asked, stepping behind me and undoing the top op my dress slowly. i just stood and stared ahead as he did so.

"though i know we could both be in large amounts of trouble with the king if he were to find out i am here, i still feel like i can trust you."

i said, looking at him over my shoulder and we both examined each other. his face was soft. softer than before. and the golden light peaking in over the terrace railing made him look more ethereal.

"i can trust you, cant i?"

i asked and his gaze shifted down my face.

"you can trust this."

he said calmly before capturing my lips in his. it was gentle and i could feel my heart knocking a my rib cage to be let out. i was kissing the boy prince. the heir apparent. and gods did it feel great.

"loki."

i whispered when he pulled away, looking between his eyes for any reason not to trust him and coming up with nothing.

"do you still wish for my help?"

he bargained and i nodded.

"i wouldnt want anything else."

it was said in such a hushed tone im sure no one else would have been able to hear it had they been in the room. i stood there as he stripped me slowly. He began with finishing the top of my dress, letting the lacing down and pushing the fabric down off my shoulders. as the dress pooled at my ankles i was left there in my sark, a small shiver traveling up my spine as his fingers traced up my arm.

"may i?"

he asked, placing his other hand firmly at my waist, tugging at the fabric. i swallowed hard, almost feeling like i shouldnt be doing this.

"yes."

i said quiet and bold.

"you are quite the woman."

he noted, pulling the sark up over my head and dropping it to the floor with my dress. i should have felt more exposed standing there naked but my back was still to him.

"Thank you my prince."

I said with some form of sincerity. He kissed my shoulder.

"I told you, call me Loki."

He whispered into my ear, sending goosebumps over my skin.

"Loki."

I half moaned, leaning back into him as his hands found their way to my hips again.

"May I touch you further?"

He questioned and I nodded against him, feeling his hand trail up my torso painfully slow. He kissed across my shoulder, up my neck, and onto my jaw before spinning me around swiftly. I gasped at the sudden movement, looking over his face as he stepped closer to kiss me properly. When he pulled away I noticed his clothes had also vanished, gone in a flash of green.

"May I make love to you?"

He asked, barely gracing my lips with his own.

"Please do."

I whispered against him before kissing him, again and again, until my back hit the soft silk of his bedding.

[peanut-butter-parkerxx]

plane pillow

where peter planned to play video games with ned through the whole flight but fate decided to take another turn....

*A/N: this isnt related to far from home nor the ending of endgame, just pretend infinity and all the movies after didnt exist since i imagine pete 16 in here. i dont know why 16 i just like that age on him lmao, enjoy reading!*

pairing: peter x reader

status: strangerz (well sort of since they haven't talked to eachother but they're in the same school)

NOT PROOF READ BTW SO SORRY IF THERE ARE ANY MISTAKES

peter's POV

"the flight will be amazing! i heard they'd installed the new game we were talking about" i gushed to ned, excited for the whole flight to be filled with video games.

"im excited" ned stated practically jumping from excitement and i shook my head laughing

"OK CLASS!" Mr Harrington clapped his hands getting our attention "we're boarding the plane in a few minutes so pack your stuff and lets goooo" he pointed at our gate dramatically.

we walked to the gate, scanned our ticket and sat on our assigned seats, ned and i sat on the three seater, he took the window seat by winning a 3 round match of rock, paper, scissors *sighs angrily* and i obvious got the middle, kinda scared of who'll sit beside me though.

we had to wait for a few minutes, since we boarded the flight early. ned and i obviously started playing video games, too entranced by the small glowing screen infront of me i haven't realized a girl.

she hadn't really acknowledged me either because she looked tired, i cursed at the screen for losing the game too quickly and my dumb ass still didnt realize a GIRL, MY AGE, looking PRETTY FUCKING ADORABLE was sitting next to me. oh dear god.

after a couple more games and me being the most idiotic teenager known today for not looking at my right to see her  the flight attendant alerted us that the plane will take off so we the screen will freeze any moment. ned and i decided to sleep, it was very early in the morning and we need to rest if we plan on gaming most of the flight.

i closed my eyes and shifted a bit in my seat, and slept. the plain was moving at the time trying to find the best place to take off. i guess i was really tired that i havent felt someone sleeping on my shoulder.

i was peacefully sleeping still agitated from the uncomfortable seat but i heard a loud noise that frightened the life out of me and due to my spidey senses i sensed a hand on my right, so what did i do? i fucking held the hand. hard, may i add, from the fright.

i opened my eyes quickly and jumped a bit, turning around to see who's the stranger that i held hands with, startled as well. i sighed in relief knowing our plane was safe and it was just about to take off. but then i took a good look on the perso- her, took a good look on her, on her? OH MY GOD ITS A GIRL calm down peter and please dont scare her off. i couldnt stop looking at her and to my luck she was looking at me as well, but none of us spoke

i couldnt help but notice the small part of her y/h/c hair that was shown from her hood looked so shiny and smooth, her eyes were the most perfect shade of y/e/c. the extremely large hoodie looked so comfortable on her which made me think of her wearing one of mine, how big and long it'll look on her body sent butterflies to my stomach. she looked small, and precious so fragile yet she held her body confidently.

the voice of the flight attendant echoed through the speakers which made us both stop our trance of one another. even though the lady's voice wasnt scary it still frightened us. i mean no hate towards miss attendant she called me a cutie and gave me extra blankets

but coz we got startled again we held hands....again looking for the sources of the noise. we visibly relaxed once we realized what it was, looked at eachother and laughed, her laugh was angelic and soft, hands down the best sound ive ever head. she looked rather embarrassed from the encounter but i bet you a thousand dollars i look worse, i could practically feel the blood rush through my cheeks once she realized how long ive stared at her

"i- uhm i-im so sorry for sleeping on your shoulder, and- and holding your hand and stuff" she apologized, it only made me even more baffled by her. how could a voice match with a face so perfectly.

"no no its fine uhh i dont mind *nervous laugh* and for the hand thing i was the one who grabbed yours so i-i should be the one apologizing...im sorry" i rubbed the back of my neck. this is why i dont talk to girls, ever. well mj is an exception since shes like the closest thing i have to a friend other than my best friend obviously.

"i-im y/n, by the way" she lifted her hand properly introducing herself

"peter, peter parker" i shook her hand, it was nice feeling the warmth of her hand again. we probably held hands (for the third time today by the way) longer the we should have but who am i to say i was bothered. i definitely wasnt.

"nice to meet you peter" she smiled shaking our hands one last time then sitting it on her lap. scratch what i said about her gorgeous laugh, hearing her say my name was the best thing ive heard in my 16 year of existence. (her laugh is obviously the second best)

before i could ask anything else, the plane decided to finally take off. i adjusted myself to the seat, not turning to my right side anymore and closed my eyes trying to think of smiling puppies. ive been on a plane before, in fact a private one last year but that was it. this is my second time flying away from new york and i was a bit nervous.

y/n somehow noticed my sudden tense form, who am i kidding i looked like i was about to die coz of my nerves. and held my hand. and i immediately opened my eyes again, the feeling of her skin coming in contact with mine brought chills down my spine, good ones obviously

"you looked rather tense, is this ok?" she leaned into my ear so i could hear her. i looked at her confused on why she would want to help me but nodded as a reply. a smile crept on my face and i couldnt seem to take it off.  the take off went smoothly thank god. and ive occasionally squeezed her hand, usually when the plane made very loud sounds. but i made it! woohoo

i didnt know if i should stop holding her hand or not, even though i didnt want to. will she think im a creep? and if i did, will she think im rude? but i guess it didnt seem to bother her if she went back to sleeping. so i figured i should do the same

i shifted in my seat a couple of times trying to get the perfect comfy spot....nothing. this seat will be the death of m-

"you can sleep on my shoulder if you want" she whispered. "i figured since you let me sleep on yours which im very sorry about, you could sleep on mine" she smiled

"thanks, but i dont wanna bother you or make you uncomfortable"

"oh nonsense! my body is screaming right now cheering for me, well partially scolding at me for saying something risky like that to a good looking guy, its ok" she laughed, her eyes widened in shock from what she confessed. i smiled at her and rested my head on her shoulder

"you think im good looking?" i whispered playing with our fingers, i dont know when i got the sudden confidence but hearing someone like her think a loser like me is cute did something to me.

"shut up" she playfully shoved me and i laughed.

"are you from midtown?" i asked her

"no im from queens" she joked

"oh you're definitely from midtown" i chuckled, next thing i know i was having a normal conversation with me laying my head on a girl i just met like we knew eachother for years, it was nice to talk to a girl i potentially thought was cute instead of talking gibberish

she was very understanding and looked like interested into what i was saying, i was gonna skip my geeky side when she asked about what i like but to my surprise, she mentioned it when i asked her the same, she said she loves comics and likes watching sci fi movies. i asked her if she watched star wars and she said she didnt...yet.

"wanna uhm watch it together?" i played with her fingers absentmindedly nervous if she'd reject me.

"yeah sure" her eyes lit up like she was waiting for me to ask her that. we watched the movie in bliss, thankfully she liked it! and immediately said to put the second one. and surprise surprise, we finished it.

when the credits rolled in, i saw her yawning, shifting in her seat again, i decided to be bold so i lifted her head off my shoulder pulled the arm rest away from us, took a pillow and patted my lap. immediately after doing it i regretted it, she barely knows me, what the fuck peter.

"you sure?" she asked smiling a bit, she looked like she felt something giddy inside which made me feel at peace again and i nodded.

"good night" she whispered snuggling her head on my lap, i hesitantly put my arm over

"good night, y/n" and we fell asleep like how ned slept the whooole time i was talking to her, wow we have a lot to catch up on

bonus:

peters pov

i didnt know the whole plane (our class) practically gushed over my interaction with y/n, i know its been a while since i liked a girl but betty and the rest (including Mr Harrington) practically begged mj to take photos of us since she was the closest, not that she wouldnt have done it without them asking her....

*A/N: idk what this bonus was lmao but i had to add the school feeling happy for our boy pete*

have a wonderful morning/afternoon/evening/night!

-quacksonlover

[ourloveisforthelovely]

Angel (one shot)

Harry Potter Marauders Era 

Request  helloooo can i ask for like a quick regulus x reader oneshot where the reader sings and regulus hears her voice and basically falls in love with it but he didnt see her face so he just comes back everyday to the same place in the hope of listening to her singing and seeing her face this time? this sounds specific i know but i feel like some soft reggie is all i need now 😭

Pairings: Regulus Black x Reader 

Rating: M- mention of self harm 

________

Suffocating… that was the best word that Regulus could use to describe his life. After joining up with the death eaters at the lovely age of 16, Regulus had quickly grown to regret his decision. Anytime that the dark mark began to burn in the slightest, Regulus found himself dying for an excuse not to go. There was, however, not one...at least nothing in Lord Voldemort’s eyes that would be “good enough.” 

On the outside, Regulus had to keep his smooth and reserved demeanor. It didn’t matter on the inside how much he was screaming. No one cared. The people that did know what he was doing continued to go on and on about how he was doing “the right thing, the noble thing.” 

It was 7:00pm and Regulus found himself running down a quiet hallway. He had to get out of the Slytherin common room. He had to get away from Evan Rosier and Barty Crouch Jr. They had been so gleeful over a muggle that had been murdered the night before. Neither seemed to care about this person nor the family that they left behind. Regulus, when the deed was taking place, didn’t care. He stood stony faced as the man begged for his life. The moment Voldemort uttered his “favorite” spell, Regulus had to swallow back the feeling of nausea as he watched the light leave the man’s eyes. 

Regulus had done well not thinking about the “deed” all day. It wasn’t until he returned to the common room and overheard Evan’s conversation did Regulus find himself regretting the day that he was born. 

No one asked a question when Regulus walked out of the common room. Why would they? People would be dumb to question Regulus on something. People knew not to question Regulus on his doing unless they wanted to be jumped. 

Regulus stopped the moment that his hands hit the balcony. Breathing heavily, he closed his eyes mentally begging for the memory to leave his mind. 

Just stop...I fucking hate this! 

Regulus thought miserably. He was half tempted to throw himself off of the balcony. It looked like a good distance and if he was lucky wouldn’t survive the fall. Death would be better than living the way that he was at the moment! 

The brooding stopped the moment that a soft voice caught Regulus’ attention. He knew a lot of the “choir kids” would come up to this particular area of the castle to practice at points. Before today, however, Regulus had never paid any of them any attention. Today, it was different. This voice was soft, gentle...everything that Regulus needed. 

Right away he recognized the French folk song that he had heard numerous times as a child. Leaning his head back against the stone wall, all of the anxiety and tension slowly left. Regulus took a deep breath and looked down at his hands. They were no longer shaking. 

I should leave...but I don’t want to. She, whomever she is, has to have the most beautiful voice. She sounds like an angel.

Regulus thought with a tiny smile. Although he had no belief in heaven, hell, angels, or demons hearing this voice had to be what an angel would sound like if there were one. This soft voice was everything that Regulus needed to hear when he needed to be told “that everything would be alright.”  

Over the following days, Regulus found himself in the same place at the same time. It didn’t matter what kind of hell that he had going on. The moment that soft voice would sing all of the bad would vanish. Even if it was just one song, Regulus was feeling a million times better when he had to return to the Slytherin common room. 

The question plaguing Regulus’ mind now was who did the voice belong to? He had been trying to put an angelic voice with a face nonstop and was coming up with nothing. None of the girls in Slytherin house fit the idea that Regulus had in his mind. 

I have to find out.

He muttered as the signing stopped. Standing up, he quickly walked into the room not having any idea what he was about to say. Regulus knew that whatever girl this was would probably think that he was a creep for spying on her night after night. What kind of girl would want that? 

“I know you’re there.” 

The singing had stopped and was replaced with a soft comment on Regulus’ appearance. Regulus turned around to see Y/n Lupin sitting by the window. You were the girl...the voice...it all fit! Regulus blinked a few times as he took everything in. Of course, it was you. It all made sense. 

“Um...hi.”

Regulus muttered. He wasn’t for sure if he had ever spoken to you before. The two of you were in the same year but your paths didn’t cross much. You were in Hufflepuff and often kept to your little group of friends or with your older brother. 

You, meanwhile, smiled noticing Regulus’ awkward silence. 

“You’ve been up here the past few nights.” 

You commented. Regulus’ face blushed as you patted the seat beside you. Regulus slowly sat down and kept his eyes straight ahead.

He had to be a blithering idiot. There would be no way in hell that anything between the two of you would ever work. You were Remus Lupin’s sister. Regulus didn’t foresee Remus being too onboard with his sister dating a Slytherin (even if Slytherins and Hufflepuffs made great matches). 

“You were upset that first night. Are you better now?”

You asked. You knew the question was probably intrusive but it came out before you really thought better of it. That night, a few nights ago, you had been up doing what relaxed you the most...singing. When you heard the angry footsteps you considered stopping but thought about how your singing seemed to comfort your own brother when he was upset. Maybe this person needed a little comforting too (even if you didn’t know them). 

When you realized that it was Regulus Black the feeling of overwhelming sympathy washed over you. You didn’t know much about Regulus other than the fact that he was Sirius’ younger brother. Over the years that you were in school, you couldn’t help but notice how sad Regulus looked most of the time. You could see those sad dark eyes from your seat at the Hufflepuff table and wanted nothing more than to give him something to smile about. He reminded you of a puppy that had been kicked one too many times. If he was anything like Sirius then you knew that was exactly how Regulus was.

 It was no secret that Walburga Black was cruel to her children. You knew first hand of the abuse. You had heard about it from Sirius himself. If that was what was plaguing Regulus’ mind every night that he came to the balcony, maybe you could give him something to feel better about?

“There really isn’t getting any better.” 

Regulus commented as you scooted closer. You had a feelin what that vague comment was leading toward.

“About being a death eater?”

Regulus’ face went pale as he turned to look at you with wide eyes. 

“How do you know? Did my brother tell you?”

You shook your head at the raised tone of his voice. 

“Ssh now. We don’t need god and everyone to hear. I saw your arm doing potions one day.”

Regulus sneered in your direction. He didn’t know how to react. Maybe just be cold like normal? What the hell was he supposed to say?

“Let me guess, you are going to tell me that I am a horrible person and that I shouldn’t be doing what I’m doing...no matter if it's what my family expected of me.”

Your momentary silence was driving Regulus nutty. After a few moments, you finally spoke. 

“No. I was actually going to say I can’t imagine what you are going through. Sometimes our families are our own worst enemies.” 

Regulus sighed.

“You’ve got that right. Look, I wasn’t spying on you. I want to just throw that out there.” 

You smiled. 

“It's alright. Your aura doesn’t seem as tense after you’re here for a bit.” 

It was Regulus’ turn to be silent. He was trying to decide if he wanted to give you a compliment. If he messed things up, there was a good chance that he would never hear your angelic voice again...and that wasn’t something that he wanted to risk losing. 

“Your voice is nice….its soothing.” 

“Thank you.”

You replied as Regulus turned back to face you. His face this time was different. He had gone from death eater to the sad puppy that needed love. 

“That first night...I was actually considering pitching myself off of that balcony. Hearing you...that was the first time I heard the most beautiful voice. It was like gravity.” 

You reached out and gently took your hand in his. Were you overstepping your boundaries with a boy that you knew nothing about and who in turn knew nothing about you? Possibly. Did you care? Not really. 

“I’m glad that you didn’t do that. You know, believe it or not, I realize how hard things can be with family. My family isn't normal…”

“Your brother is a werewolf.”

Regulus commented and instantly regretted his choice of words when your face went pale. 

“Not that it matters though. It's just who Remus is.” 

Regulus quickly added, hoping to save what hope of a friendship that he had with you. You, to his relief, smiled. 

“Yes, it is who he is. I feel no guilt in telling you this now. With his condition, I tend to be second in the family. My parents don’t mean to put me on the back burner but it happens. It's hard...so I know now you must feel. How did you figure it out, if you don’t mind me asking. He literally tells no one.” 

Regulus shrugged. 

“Just put the puzzle pieces together.” 

You continued to rub slow circles over Regulus’ palm hoping to relax him further. This was the first time (other than James and Sirius) someone had figured out Remus “furry little problem.” 

“You’re really intelligent and perceptive then. If you want...you know...we could do this every evening when you're free. We don’t have to tell anyone that we are meeting up. Sometimes it's nice just to have someone outside of your friend circles.” 

Regulus looked up and was clearly surprised. 

“You would want to see me again?”

You nodded. 

“If you want to see me that is...no pressure.” 

Regulus quickly nodded, cutting you off. 

“I would love to see you again...maybe around 7 tomorrow?”

You gave his hand a squeeze. 

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” 

_________

@amelie-black @realgaytrash @truly-insatiable @fandomsxxregulus @lucasfilms77 @exhsle @spiderxalmighty @jessyballet @knreidy1 @bennyberry @quuenofblacks @hazncalsgal @criminalyetminimal @whymyparentscheckmyphone @acciosiriusblack @brokencasbutt67-writer @authoressskr @fandom-trash-worth-it @summer-novak @hankypranky @stuckinsaudi1 @emiwrites3reads @shaylybaby2032 @li0nh34rt @tas898 @shadows-and-padlocked-hearts @knight-of-gleefulness @shitfaceddaniel @untoldshortsofthefandoms @deanwherescas @sprnaturallover @wontlookaway @mycuddlycorner

[fallingfor-fics]

Teachers Pet-chapter 17: wanting

All chapters

chapter 16

Potions seemed to drag on forever, Snape was just teaching a lesson, his velvety monotone voice going on and on about a potion we were gonna brew soon. I was trying my best to stay awake, I was still very exhausted and his voice was slowly lulling me to sleep. My eyelids felt heavy and I let them close for one second, or so I thought. I began drifting off and it was too difficult to open them again. I could hear his voice get quieter as I slipped into unconsciousness. I should have known better, I saw a kid fall asleep in his class once and he practically hexed them, he took away house points and yelled at the boy, which ensured he never made that mistake again. 

I jumped awake to a tap on my shoulders. My head was now on the table on my arms and I opened my eyes to see Draco staring at me. "Y/n, come on class is over." he said, collecting his books. "What?" I looked around and saw most of the kids had already left and Snape wasn't anywhere to be seen. "Where's Professor Snape? Why didn't he wake me up? Why didn't you wake me up!" I said lightly shoving his shoulder as we headed out of the classroom. "He left as soon as the bell rang, and I didnt think I needed to, I mean I tried and you didn't move so I figured you needed the sleep." He said smiling. "How odd that he did not get angry with me, did he even say anything?" I asked as we went to the Slytherin common room. "No, when he looked and saw you asleep he just rolled his eyes and kept teaching, I guess he figured if you have the time to sleep, then you don't need to learn haha" I thought over what he was saying, that's not like Snape at all why would he do that? And he knows I'm bad at potions so you would think he'd want me to pay attention.

We went to our rooms for our free period and I said I'd see him at dinner. I was alone in my room and decided to get the book out I had stolen from Snape's room earlier. I began from the start and read the first few chapters, I noticed it began getting dark out and looked at the clock, "Great I missed dinner." I realized I had gotten through almost half of the book, it was very informational, and sadly to say, was giving me some ideas. I mean there's no way I could earn Severus' affections but a girl can dream right? I got my bag and quickly headed out to make it to Snapes lessons. "Draco! So sorry I missed Dinner I got caught up reading!" I said seeing him in the common room, "Oh that's ok I actually saved you this dinner" he said handing me a dinner roll. I smiled taking it from him, "thanks so much I'll catch you later!" I took a bite of the roll not realizing how hungry I was and headed to the potions classroom. The door was closed so I stood there and knocked on it. Recalling when Severus rescued me from the weird encounter with Lockhart that one day, I smiled to myself thinking about how he's always been there in my times of need, so conveniently.

"Come in" I heard him say from the other side and I walked in smiling, taking another bite of my roll. "Evening Professor," I said, sitting down in Dracos seat. It was closer to Snape's desk, easier to hear him from here of course, no other reason. "Today I figured we would look over the Amortentia potion" he said looking up at me, I dropped my smile, that was the potion he was teaching earlier that I so happened to have fallen asleep during the lesson. "About that," I said, getting up and walking over to his desk, "I wanted to know why you didn't wake me up during class." I said fiddling with my fingers. He looked down at his papers thinking for a moment. "I figured you deserved it after last night, although you should have indeed been awoken, I didn't want to disturb the lesson either." He said not looking up at me. "About last night.." I began "No need to discuss the matter Ms.L/n, It was wrong of me to have not sent you back to your dormitory immediately." He interrupted. "What? No..I wanted to thank you once more, It was almost a miracle you showed up when you did, and not punishing me, it helped a lot, I've been having a rough time and i'm glad you were there." I said within a small smile, I hoped this wasnt to far a reach and he didn't find it weird, I mean he was just comforting a student, nothing more. He didn't say anything he just stared down at his papers, I had said too much. I turned and sat back down. "We should get started." he said, stacking his papers. "Right." I said not looking up at him. It fell silent and I needed to break the silence, "Professor how well do you know Professor Lockhart?" I said looking up at him. "As well as any teacher I suppose why?" he asked furrowing his brows. "If I tell you something will you promise not to get angry and get me in trouble?" I said looking around and then pulling my chair up to his desk. He straightened up and looked at me with worried eyes.

"I might regret it, but sure." he said with a sarcastic tone. "Um, well... During Defense Against the Dark Arts today, we were practicing the protection spell, and I didnt have a partner again, and so Lockhart made me practice with him. He said to do easy spells to practice against. And at the end of class I was arguing with him because he used a dueling spell and he proceeded to say it was because he knew I could 'handle' it," he continued listening to me closely growing more and more confused and concerned as I went on. "And he was like 'watch' and raising his wand, and I wasn't prepared and I didnt know what he was going to do.." I looked down at my hands scared to let out the last part, "And so out of defense I hit him with Expelliarmus and he flew across his desk." I said breathing out the last part. Snape's eyes went wide for a moment and then his mouth grew into a small smile. I let my shoulders relax at his response and let out a light chuckle. "Wow Y/n you really like to test this mans limits." he said back in his normal tone. "He just makes me so furious, and I was so shocked he pulled his wand on me without a heads up so I got afraid." I added. "Are you gonna tell Dumbledore?" I asked with furrowed brows. "Well what did Lockhart do about it?" he asked looking in my eyes, I shifted in my seat, he had such an intense stare and his dark eyes looked so strong. "You see, that's the weird part, he didn't do anything," at this he returned his face to its normal stern look and looked a tad shocked, "All he said was 'be careful, you never know the consequences of your actions' and then let me leave." I said using air quotes and mocking his voice.

But Snape did not seem amused, he just looked away and dropped his gaze on my eyes and looked at the wall in thought I presumed. He didn't say anything or the next minute and I grew worried, "What?" he didn't respond. "Severus what is it?!" I said raising my voice a tad looking in his eyes. He snapped his gaze to me and opened his mouth to speak, "Dont scold me for using your name, what are you thinking about." "Nothing Ms. L/n, it's fine I just wonder why he did not assign you a detention. And I told you not to call me Severus'' Wow. The way he said his own name was beautiful, but now's not the time for this. "Well we are friends now, and friends don't use formalities such as Ms. L/n and Mr. Snape" I said jokingly but he didn't seem amused, "Definitely do not call me Mr. Snape" he said in a cold tone, I guess I hit a soft spot, I mean it makes sense, he didn't like his father and I'm guessing that was what he would hear a lot. "We are friends though, I mean at least here in our lessons, I won't do it during school.." I said reassuring him. "If it will make you focus then fine, now let's get started we have wasted enough time."

Hours had passed and I suggested he teach me how to brew the potion now for practice, and to prevent me from any mishaps in class. But he refused and said to just wait until we did it as a class since it was already so late. I was sitting next to him at his desk since we were going over stuff in the textbook. I went to close it and my arm brushed against his, I paused for a moment and let the feeling linger on my arm, I looked over at him and made eye contact with him, I got up and walked over to my table putting my book down. "I uh was organizing the books today but didn't get to finish, I can do that quickly if you'd like?" I asked, looking at the last bookshelf. "No that's alright" he said, not looking at me. "I-I should probably go now anyways heh '' I said awkwardly collecting my things, "Yes that is probably best" he said shuffling random papers around. "Ok um I will see you in class tomorrow, Goodnight Severus." I said walking to leave, "Goodnight Y/n" I smiled and walked out down the hall. I got to my room and one of my roommates was still awake, I smiled at her as I sat my bags down and sighed, "Y/n you like to read right?" my roommate asked, her name was Ruth and she was pretty popular, she had long dark brown hair and beautiful green eyes. Lots of the boys liked her, but we never became friends, but she was nice. "Yeah I do" I said looking up at her. "Good here, my muggle friend had this sent to me, but I'm not gonna touch it so you can have it." she said, extending the book to me. "Oh t-thank you! Are you sure?" I asked looking up at her hesitantly taking it from her hand, "Yeah at least i'll get some use if you have it." she said smiling, "Well ok thanks" She just nodded and said goodnight turning out her lamp and going to bed. I laid it on my bed and went to get ready to go to sleep.

When I finished I sat on my bed picking up the book, "Lolita" hmm I said reading the title to myself. I put it in my bag and told myself i'd read it once I was done with the one I stole from Severus, I grabbed the small book and continued to read through it, it was actually very helpful, except for the fact I wasn't going to get to try any of these things with him. "If the one your heart desires, does not at first glance your way, find someone to make them envy and draw attention to thine self." Merlin this translation was kind of hard to interpret, unless it was really suggesting to make them jealous, my only issue was no matter who I dated, Severus still wouldn't look at me the way I want him to. I needed to get this idea of him eventually falling for me out of my head. I looked in the margin at at a note that was scribbled in, 'she has found someone' I frowned reading it. This poor person, they must have really wanted things to work with this other girl. I flipped to the beginning to where I left the flower. It was a little white one flattened from the pages. I grabbed my wand and murmured a small "Appare Vestigium" A swirl of gold went over the pages and the flower and a few small fingerprints appeared on the flower. This would show me any magic that was lingering but it was not helpful in finding out where the flower came from and who wrote in this book. I guess I was just gonna have to tell Severus I took it and ask him whose it was, that was going to be fun.

[svft-cas]

we need to talk || jj maybank x reader

summary: you and jj have a pregnancy scare and it puts everything in perspective

warnings: cursing, underage usage, implied sex?

words: 1.1k

masterlist

a/n: this is my first so idk how to feel about it lmao, but if you read this feel free to request :) also the gif is not mine, all creds to the creator

it had been already two weeks. two weeks since you were suppose to get your period, but it hasn’t happened and all you could think of was: baby. not that it was wrong to think of a baby growing inside of you at this moment in your life, but you were 17 and your boyfriend had barely turned 18 last month.

you rushed to the pharmacy to grab a quick pregnancy test. you couldn’t take any chances. after you paid for the test, you quickly drove to Sarah’s house. she was the only one you could think of at the moment so you drove to her home, running to her door and knocking like crazy. to your luck, rafe was the one who answer and of course it wasn't very pleasant that brief moment you had to share with him. after your little encounter with your friend’s brother, you ran to her room storming into it and just with a heavy breath managed to blurt out “im pregnant”. sarah’s face dropped, it changed like 15 shades before actually managing to say something. “what? you? what?”. you entered the room straight into the bathroom, “i don't know yet, but its been 2 weeks since my period was supposed to start, and im here NO PERIOD!”

you took the test and left it inside the bathroom, as you walked out you could basically listen to sarah’s brain working out a speech “does jj know about this?” “of course he doesn't! i don't even thought of the idea until this morning. god.”

you saw her typing something into her phone “what are you doing?” asked her with fear. “texting jj, he need to know about this, unless he is not...?” you cut her off before she could even finish her question “oh my go sarah! no of course he is”

a couple minutes after your little chat with the blondie, jj was at the door of the Cameron’s residence. what was going through jj’s mind wasn't exactly positive. to be honest, receiving a text message from your girlfriend’s best friend saying that she needs to talk to you and “it’s important” isn’t exactly something good. the maybank boy walked straight to sarah’s room, where he supposed you two were, and he knocked. he felt so stupid for doing that, but he genuinely thought you were about to breakup with him, and with right. the past few days you had been avoiding him and the rest of the pogues, you weren't showing up to any parties or even texting them back. he was preoccupied about your relationship and had thought of every single thing that he had done ever since you started to act distant and weird. but he couldn't come up with anything, which just made everything 10 times worst.

“come in, jj” he heard you say, the sound of your voice calming his nerves a little bit. “hey” he said with a quiet voice. “i’ll leave you two guys so you can talk” sarah stood up from her bed and walked out her room, not without before giving jj a gentle squeeze “what the hell was that about?” jj tried to lift the mood and chuckled. “jj, we need to talk” you said with a serious tone, jj’s heart sank, everybody with a third of a brain cell knew what that phrase meant.

you invited him to sit down next to you, “what i'm about to say it's not easy, and i completely understand if you don't want to talk to me afterwards of i don't know, get mad at me?”

“cut the crap y/n, what’s been going on?, you’ve been acting weird for a couple days know and ugh this feeling of suspense is killing me: are you gonna break up with me?” jj blurted out, he genuinely couldn’t handled the tension and mysterious situation that you were setting. “oh god, no im not, but i understand if after this, well, maybe you wanna leave-” “tell you didnt cheat, im begging you” his voice sounded like it was about to crack, he was so scared, the thought of losing you was the worst thing, and it was becoming true. you were the most important thing in his life (you and the pogues) and he did not wanted to lose you.

“no. jj, i've been acting weird because,” you stood up from the bed and went inside the bathroom to grab the test. you hadn’t look at the results since you took it, you wanted to do it with jj. you picked up the test and saw two lines in it. your eyes started to fill up with tears and as you turned to face jj managed to say “im pregnant”

jj’s world just took an 180. “what?” his emotions were too much to let him speak, he felt happy and relieved about the fact that he didn’t actually had to lose you. “omg this is amazing, i genuinely thought you were breaking up with, i was ready to cry and beg on my knees for you to stay, but thank god it wasn't”

you couldn’t believe your boyfriend in front of you, was he really more affected by the fact of a possible breakup than a baby? “well, jj what so you think?” you asked lowkey mad but also curious, it was your future on the line what you were talking about.

“about the baby?” you nodded “oh honey, it's really not up to me, if you want to keep it, i swear i'm gonna be here for you and support both of you. im not saying its gonna be easy but ill try. and don't even worry about my dad, ill take some cash i have stash and we’ll start somewhere else.” the thought of having a family, to jj was always on his mind. he loved to think about you two leaving the outer banks and starting a new life, and well now a family. “but also if you dont wanna keep it, i’m okay with that decision, it's up to you. i don't want you thinking that i’m not gonna be here okay? i love you and i’ll be here by your side no matter what, you know why? because i love you, y/n”

what just happened was something else, and it made you realize that you really found the love of your life and that he was an amazing guy, all you could ask for. you were in love with him and the thought of starting a life and family with him, didn't sound so crazy after this talk. you were really settling and not regretting it.

[hongism]

hi caly boo its ur 🌊 anon! i finally finished the most brilliant darkness and oh my lawd i’m in spain without the s. to put it shortly: U DID NOT DISAPPOINT BESTIE, and it seems unreal that u and ur mind and this fic even exists bc every moment is just polished to perfection, while simultaneously every character is polished to a sort of imperfect perfection(?). i have so many questions and things to say idek where to start, and tho im not good with words and even worse at deciphering hidden meanings, here are just some of my thoughts that i remember from the story.

hello my dear!!! eee im gonna answer separately since i think i’ll be very long-winded as usual but first of all thank you so much :(( this fic is actually very full of subliminal messages and hidden nuances that are weaved throughout which i think could be quite confusing so i apologize for that! if i had managed my time better, i would have adjusted when i started the fic to account for managing those aspects of the fic but alas i’m terrible at time management and i suck so. anyways.

first of all, ngl halfway into the story i lowkey forgot this was a wooyoung fic bc SANNN and also bc wooyoung appeared like 3 times lol. even after it finishing all that, i still had my doubts as to why this is a wooyoung fic, or more like why is san this significant in a wooyoung fic. im still a bit slow on these pls forgive me and im just curious why u made it like that.

i think yeah the most interesting thing about this fic is the emphasis on san over wooyoung. and when looking over it yeah i could have switched san and wooyoung’s characters and called it a day, but wooyoung really in my mind acts as the integral turning point for decisions made in the story. 

the goal with the fic wasn’t really to be hyperfocused on the pairing itself, but rather the emotions and thought processes of each character (aside from wooyoung). wooyoung was kept intentionally mysterious and a bit set apart from the rest of the fic because his role in story was moreso an abstract of hestia, the goddess of the hearth and home. wooyoung’s character appeared in times where y/n was struggling with the thought of home or adjusting to the new changes in her life! wooyoung’s pairing itself was actually intended to be solely platonic at first, but as the story went on i thought having mc develop feelings for him added another turning point in the fic!

moving on, the second biggest question i had is the whole hestia!wooyoung and cafe aurora situation. i did a bit of reading on hestia and only found out that she was the goddess of hearth, which might explain the fireplace and the kind of homey feeling to the cafe. and ‘cafe aurora not really existing to most’ part, which was already hinted at wooyoung randomly disappearing, mc never seeing the cafe before or wooyoung only bringing people he wants into it. i get that him inviting mc must suggest her significance to him, but why was he so adamant about his friends not mentioning him or the cafe to mc before that? wooyoung is quite a mysterious character i think, and given that this fic is supposed to be about him, it’s a bit odd that there’s still so many things left unknown, but its kinda cool that way nonetheless and im guessing u would also like to explain that further outside of the story too.

i think my biggest regret about this fic is the fucking summary.... i wrote that summary well before i even started writing the fic thinking it would go in that direction but it didn’t. and since this fic was for a collab, i left the summary as is because i genuinely cannot for the life of me figure out a better one. but i’m trying to figure out a better one. but i really fucking hate the current summary because it’s not at all what the fic is truly about and i hate it.

however, i don’t hate the fic itself, and the reason why i don’t is because i got to play with both my writing style and how i displayed the story. for this collab we were asked to pick a greek god and one of the seven deadly sins, and i selected hestia and sloth. and initially i had intended to have sloth be represented by the reader’s depression, and wooyoung be a more ‘real’ depiction of hestia. i shifted gears very early on in the fic but what it became is moreso abstract realizations in the characters.

san’s character is meant to be this idea of sloth, and it’s mentioned several times that he doesn’t want to move forward, he wants to go slow, he wants to stop moving so fast through life, and those things point to him being a depiction of sloth

wooyoung’s was harder to encapsulate in a more abstract way but you hit the nail on the head really with the homey feeling of the cafe. beyond that, mc talks about just naturally feeling at ease and comfortable with how things are with wooyoung and being around him, and he takes up this role of being the likeable, warm, cozy, comforting character. it all comes to a head in the last scene where he brings both y/n and san into the cafe.

and again wooyoung’s character is meant to be most mysterious and abstract, but if i had had more time to fully flesh out the fic, i think i would have liked to touch more on him. at the same time however i left it more open-ended and open to interpretation. the significance in him inviting mc in and not being mentioned by the others sooner is twofold. one; the others never really had any reason whatsoever to mention wooyoung. he was a friend outside the circle who never joined in with them when mc was around. i personally in my own friendships don’t mention friends outside the circle by name or anything, just kinda vaguely talking about them unless im certain the people know who this person is. the concept of wooyoung having to invite mc in was more nuanced and vague as well, intentionally so, but that was moreso meant to represent this idea of ‘you can’t make a home somewhere where you aren’t invited’ so y/n couldn’t fully make a home of the place she was in without being invited in and welcomed in, but again that’s something i wish i had more time to fully flesh out.

the hongjoong speech about love (and also the interaction with seonghwa after that) deserves a standing ovation of its own 👏 unfortunately, or not, im not actually going through the emotional turmoil regarding love the same way as hj or mc to be able to fully relate to his words, but the whole ‘if you dont love what u see in the mirror then u dont love it’ mentality really hit me hard, and i’d like to hang onto that when i make decisions in the future haha thank you wise caly! seonghwa and hongjoong’s story is also beautiful, and just like mc said, the more i look at it the more it hurts :’)

the hongjoong speech about love was meant to be something very jaded and specific to his worldview. it actually isn’t wholly how i view love personally, but it was a perfect description to how both he and y/n perceived the love in their own lives. mostly thanks to their own emotional turmoils. the mentality of the mirror quote is something that i think i also struggle with, which is why i included it. it’s hard to do, but even in friendships, i think it’s necessarily to stop and look at the person you were before this relationship and then the person during this relationship. if you don’t love the one you are now, then maybe it’s a sign to reflect and see the bigger picture, so that was a lil reminder to myself and i’m glad it touched you as well!!!

“do you love him, or do you love the idea of being in love with him?” - haha i see what u did there (or maybe i didnt please dont laugh at me if i didnt). its still so good everytime i see it bc i keep finding myself loving just the idea of things time and time again even when this makes total sense to me oof :/

heh yeah again with the more abstract concepts this one was more direct and ‘cliche’ but i fully wanted that cliche in the fic because i thought it suited the situation where mc was constantly struggling with a version of san that she thought she loved vs the version of san she got every time they were together

despite how enlightened she seems to be, mc still made the same choices, and i wanna smack her for it and pat her back at the same time. and maybe also bc of the fact that she feels so differently for the two men that i feel like no ending could really justify her decision, so ending in the vague is probably the best. your ending might kind of allude to someone more than the other already, and tho i still don’t think he’s the best one for her based on just my pov on love, i kinda agree with you. but again, this raises the question of, why a wooyoung fic and not a san fic?

and yeah the whole knife in the chest at the end of it all is that she was still too scared to face the music so to speak. but really i would say she made the same choices up until the conversation on the balcony with san. and you’re absolutely right, the reason i chose the ending the way i did was because either way, there’s no justification. and actually although it might seems like i was alluding to someone specific, san being in the cafe at the very end was moreso to represent that as much as they fought, he still very much loved her and wanted to be loved by her. it was kinda an open casket ending there were no nails in the coffin, the choice between wooyoung and san still stands and an argument could be made for either of them! i think this is a fic that i could see myself revisiting one day with two endings - one for san, and one for wooyoung.

something i didn’t mention earlier about wooyoung’s character being left intentionally mysterious was that he was representing a new and budding love. the honeymoon phase where you’re falling for someone you don’t even really know. you are the reader aren’t meant to really know who wooyoung is because of that beyond what you read about him, so his past and such was left out intentionally to represent that idea of ‘hey wow im in love with a stranger!’ whereas san was this gritty love that’s bad for you. and there are pros and cons to each just as with anything!!

so,,,, why a wooyoung fic and not a san fic? well i picked wooyoung for my collab so he was one of the main focuses of the fic regardless of which direction i took with it. as for why wooyoung wasn’t more forward, i already answered that but !!! i view it as both a wooyoung fic and a san fic. both are highlighted characters with main pairing roles!

i literally just woke up to write this and am going back to sleep ahaha so i apologize if this makes no sense. i somehow felt like i’ve read so much yet so little at the same time, maybe bc there are still so many things i havent fully made sense of, and that’s where i hope you come in and enlighten me. i still stand by my word that this fic deserves so much more recognition despite the lack of explicit smut bc of how much more you’ve explored through character building. love you caly and thank u for working so hard <3 — 🌊

no worries my beloved i hope you go back to sleep and get lots and lots of rest!! and i hope my response helps enlighten the not so clear things as well dgjdklfg but really thank you so much. it was a long fic and hard to get through at times, but as a whole, i’m proud of it and what i created, so thank you for recognizing my efforts and appreciating them 🥺

[tanakax123]

*Not Just friends* part 1???

~Manger Fem reader x Oikawa 

~summary: You are the manager of the Aobajohsai High volleyball team. really close friends with Oikawa, so you know he has a lot of girls going after him. He rarely dates them however when he gets a new girlfriend she does not sit well with you. Will oikawa pick her or you?? 

~ warnings: uhhh idk but hes kind of mean at some point, bad words, bullying?

~ A/N: i suck at writing and im trying to get better so yes. Hahaha so enjoy this trashy story lol. 

     Being friends with Oikawa Toru is one of the most difficult things that anyone could ever imagine. However you manage just fine, well not really because he was cute but not the point. All these girls keep trying to fight you since you are one of his closest friends. However it has never bothered you and even if it did Oikawa made sure that they knew where they stand, which just made your heart race really fast. Which is why the amount of bullying from the girls settled down. 

     One day you were on your way to volleyball practice when you bumped into Iwaizumi. “Hello Y/N, im so sorry are you okay”. You looked up at him with a smile and just shook your head. “Its okay Iwa, are you on your way to practice? lets walk together”. he just smiled at you and then started walking towards the gym. 

On your way there you guys were just talking about a new movie that had just come out. When you guys started to get closer to the gym you heard two people talking and one of the voices sounded really familiar. You grab your friend and pull him to the wall. “whats wrong Y/N?” you look at him and put a finger over his mouth. You then point outside where he notices Oikawa talking to a female student. Both of you look at eachother, nod, and start to listen to the conversation. 

“Oikawa...I... I really like you. P-Please accept my feelings” said the girl. 

Your turn to look at Iwazumi suprised. You looked at him and you realize he notices the same thing as you. 

...Oikawa was blushing. 

At this moment you kind of felt a bit jealous. You have never seen Oikawa blush this much. And for a girl? never. Only for volleyball but I think everyone has seen that.

Then Oikawa gave his answer. “I accept them” and he smiles “I like you too.” He then tilts his head to give her a kiss. you rapidly turn around and hug Iwaizumi trying to hide the tears in your face. You have had a crush on your bestfriend for so long but he never noticed you so you just kept being his friend. Iwaizumi being the amazing friend he is already knew that you had a crush on Oikawa so he just hugged you back rubbing circles on your back. “It is going to be okay Y/N” he assured you. However, you were not so sure. 

Once you calmed down you and Iwa walked to the gym together. You felt bad since you caused iwa to be late to practice. “Dont worry about it, your emotional state is important to me too” he smiles at you and leaves to go get changed. You then enter the gym and notice Oikawa is running towards you

“Y/N, I have newsssssss!!!”. You take a deep breath and put on a smile. You can not let your feelings get in the way of being happy for your best friend. “Yes Toru?” (since you guys became best friends he insisted on you calling him by his first name, and since then you have never called him by his last name) he had one of the biggest smiles. you tried so hard not let tears fall. 

“I have a....girlfriend!!!!” 

You stopped smiling but he didnt notice. You smiled once again “Thats awesome Toru”. He grabbed your arm and tried to pull you in for a hug, however you stopped him. “If you have a girlfriend you probably should not be hugging other girls” you teased. He gave you a confused look “but you are my best friend, you dont like me like that so its okay, besides she knows we are close friends” you look up at him and laugh nervously “haha right” you give him a hug and tell him to go back to practice. What you both didnt know is that his girlfriend was standing outside looking through a window. 

she really did not like you. 

but we dont like her either so bleh

After about a month of them dating Oikawa has been hanging out with you less and less. It was only natural right? he got a girlfriend and he is spending most of his time with her. However it was NOT natural. He basically only talked to you like once every two days. Not even at volleyball practice. 

pathetic.

After a volleyball practice, you notice Oikawa starting to walk up to you. You look at him but then turn away to start cleaning up since it was time to go home. “hey Y/N...” you just nodded your head but did not say anything. he frowned “...im really sorry”. you knew why he was apologizing so thats when you looked up. There he was looking really upset. how could you not accept that apology. “ohh~ is the great Toru really apologizing... to me?!~” you tease. He then looked at you with wide eyes, immediately replaced with teasing ones. “you know what i take my apology back~” you start to laugh. he then tries to reach for your hand to pull you into a hug but once you see this you pull your hand away. “we should finish cleaning” you smile awkwardly then start walking away towards Iwaizumi. the entire team saw you guys, they knew something was not right but they decided not to say anything. “Are you okay Y/N?” Iwaizumi asked. you smile at him “of course”. Oikawa saw this interaction, he was not jealous of course he was hehe but he didnt know why he felt so uneasy.

Once you were done cleaning you were the last one there because the coach had to talk to you about the next practice game that was going to be in a week. When you started to lock the gym you heard footsteps behind you. you turn around and there she was. that bitch... i mean Oikawas girlfriend. 

“hey y/n we have to talk”. you just looked at her ‘why the hell is she here at this time of night’ however you just nodded your head signaling for her to start talking. “look y/n, im going to get straight to the point, i dont like you..” ‘ wow i am sooo suprised’ you thought “...you are annoying and always getting in the way. I love Oikawa so im going to do what is best for him” she stayed silent for a while. but what she said next you were not ready for. 

“You need to stop being friends with Oikawa” 

Your eyes widen and you swear you stopped breathing. what the actual fuck does this bitch think she is saying. stop being friends with Oikawa? why? why does she hate you so much to do this? of course you were not just going to let her push you around. 

“What the fuck did you just say to me” 

“you heard me”

“im sorry but i am not going to be doing that. Not unless he asks me himself, but since you swear you know him so well then you know that he wont be doing that so please stop this before you regret it”

and then before you knew it you were on the ground. she fucking punched you. ‘shit she is strong’ “You better do as i say before you lose Oikawa in the way that he wont even look at you” she then started walking away “watch yourself” and all you hear is her footsteps as you are staring at the ground. 

You dont know how long you were staring at the floor, until you heard a voice “Y/N!! are you okay??” then they started shaking your shoulders. You looked up and you see Iwa. “I thought you went home” you say. He then gave you a little side smile “and leave you to walk alone? what kind of friend would i be?” He then helped you get up and started to walk you home. 

On your way home Iwa asked you if you wanted to talk about it. He explained to you that he had seen the entire thing unfold. How she told you she didnt like you, how she told you to stop talking to Oikawa and how she punched you. You then turn to look at him with tears in your eyes. He looks at you with so much worry, so all he can think to do is hug you. The second his arms wrap around you all the tears you have been holding in just came out. You just kept crying and crying till you physically couldnt anymore. 

“it will be okay y/n. trust me”

the next day you went to school like nothing happened. 

and the next day as well.

and the next.

It was all forgotten about really, until oikawa asked you the one thing you didnt want to hear.

“Hey y/n! i think its time to introduce you to my girlfriend!” he shouted across the entire court during practice. everyone kind of just froze, especially Iwaizumi. Your glared at Oikawa “no thanks” you were mad. he hasnt talked to you in a while and thats the one thing he says to you? really? he started to jog towards you “come on y/n...you dont even know her. she is a nice person!” he tried reaching out for your arm but you swatted his hand away. 

“i said no Oikawa” 

His eyes looked hurt. You just called him by his last name. You never did that. Then it was his turn to be angry. “Why not y/n. You are being unfair” and just as you were about to say something Oikawa’s girlfriend opened the gym doors. ‘speak of the devil’ you thought. you turn to look at Oikawa who looked really angry “we will talk about this later y/n” he said as he started to walk towards his girlfriend. You rolled your eyes and scoffed. 

“yeah right more like in the next 10 years” the volleyball team snickered except Iwaizumi. He knew what was about to go down so he was ready to interfere if necessary. This was when Oikawa snapped. 

“what the fuck if your problem”

you scoffed again. “whats my problem?” you started to laugh. “You really want to know?? Fine. I will tell you. YOU OIKAWA! you are my problem.” then you rolled you eyes “of course your little princess as well” you then turn to his girlfriend and bow down as if she was an actual princess. 

“I am your problem?!  the fuck did i do?! and dont be rude to my girlfriend. she hasnt done anything to you” 

“Thats the problem oikawa! you didnt do anything!! you stopped talking to me and dont even give me five minutes of your time! its like my fucking feelings dont matter to you! oh and by the way your little “princess” has done something to me” you then turn to her and say “you want to tell him sweetheart or should I” all while glaring at her. 

She then started to cry telling Oikawa that she would never do anything to you and that you were lying. “y/n stop telling lies. she wouldn't do anything to you” oikawa said. 

You looked at him. tears in your eyes. Hoping that he could see that you felt hurt and betrayed. “are you seriously going to believe her over me?! your best friend!?” Oikawa then looks between you and his girlfriend. 

“Yes. I am. shes my girlfriend.” 

You stood there. You couldn't even cry. so instead you laughed. you couldnt stop. Your laughter just made the rest of the team cringe. they could hear you were hurt. “y/n...?” you hear Iwaizumi say. Then you stopped laughing. looked straight at Oikawa. Then let the tears roll down your face. 

“Fine.” you started to gather up your things then put your bag over your shoulder. You started to walk towards the exit. Once you were standing next to oikawa you stopped. 

“Goodbye Oikawa”

and with that you left. 

years of friendship and memories gone.

continue??????

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If you got to here hiiiiiii. Thank you for reading this!! i know it wasnt all that great but should i do a part 2??? there is more to the story in my head but im not sure if i should continue or let the reader suffer hehehe. please let me know!! 

[backtobackbakubabe]

I’m Gonna Make This Place Your Home (Part 5)

Bakugo X Reader 

Words: 3060 

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You watched as your boss... former boss scurried away in fear. Doing exactly what Bakugo said. He packed his shit up and left. You were tapping your foot in frustration as you spun around to face the source of your anger. “Why did you do that?”

Bakugo’s eyes widened. Not expecting you to be angry with him for protecting you, “What the fuck? What do you mean why did I do that? He grabbed your ass! RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME! He said he was going to make your life difficult!”

You crossed your arms over your chest, “So what? You threaten to blow up his face? That doesn't make you any better than him. You're better than that Bakugo.”

Bakugo began to pace running his hands through his hair like a madman, “Look I’m sorry if you have this idealistic nice guy hero version of me stuck in your head, but I have news for you. I’m only that guy... when it concerns you! To everyone else in the world I’m an asshole with a bad temper. I’m not going to apologize for making a scumbag who violated you, piss his pants. He deserved much worse than what he got.”

You could see he was beginning to work himself up and knew it wouldn't do any good to push him so instead you took a deep breath and sat down on the couch pulling him with you. You held his hand in yours, playing with his fingers. “Listen I know who you are. I would never in a million years try to change you. But I do think sometimes its important to pick your battles. Remember there’s a difference between villains and just plain, every day bad people. Yes Riku was an asshat and a sleezeball. But there’s plenty of ways to deal with a guy like him that dosen’t involve threats and violence.” You scooted closer and leaned your head on his stiff shoulder, “I appreciate that you care about me. But at some point you’re going to have to let me fight my own battles...” 

You felt him sigh and moments later his arm was slug around you, pulling you closer. “Do I have to?” He put his chin on top of your head, “You’ve already had to fight most of your life Y/n... I don't stick up for you because I don’t think you’re capable. I’ve seen your dreams... I know exactly how capable you are.” You flinched. You had no idea you had been sucking him into your dreams. “I stick up for you because you shouldn't have to fight anymore. You deserve to be happy and anyone who thinks otherwise deserves a foot up their ass.” 

A single tear slid down your cheek. The only time you had ever felt like this before was... your dad. This sense of protection, devotion... was it love? Is this what love felt like? You knew there were many different forms of love. Books had taught you that much. But this didn't feel like a friendly platonic love. This burned so much deeper in your heart than that. 

Bakugo lifted your chin so he could see your face, “Shit are you crying? I didn’t mean to make you cry. I’m sorry. I’m an asshole. I shouldn’t have brought up your dreams. I’m an idio-” 

You reached up and gave him a soft peck on the lips. It felt so right. It felt so normal, like it was something you had been doing your whole life. “I’m not crying because I’m sad Bakugo... I’m crying because... well... I actually don't know why.. relief maybe? I’ve never had someone care about me the way that you do.. For a while I never thought I would. I never thought someone could ever....”

You cut yourself off. You almost said ‘love me’ but you couldn't put those words in his mouth. They needed to be his own.

You cast your eyes to your lap but Bakugo’s warm hand cupped your cheek and brought your eyes back to him. “Love you... is that what you were going to say?” 

Your eyes watered in embarrassment. You had never wanted Bakugo to see this fragile part of you. “So what if it was?”

Bakugo pressed his forehead to yours, “So what if I do?” 

Your heart started to pound as you rapidly tried to blink your tears away. “I would say theres plenty of girls out there who are easier to love than me.” 

He had your face cupped between both of hands now “I don’t want easy... I want you.” 

Your lips crashed against his in a much hungrier kiss than before. Your fingers ran through his soft blonde hair and one of his hands trailed down to find your hip. Things were heating up when you heard someone shout. 

“FINALLY” You both jerked apart to see Tasha giving you a goofy smile, “It’s about fucking time! I’ve literally watched you guys tip toe around each other for weeks now!” She continued to wipe down the counter, “Oh sorry for eavesdropping but it honestly was hard not to. I called the owner by the way. Everything’s good here. Looks like I got a promotion and you got a raise. Happy day.” She looked up from the machine she was currently cleaning, “I’ll teach you how to do this some other night. I think you too should get home and continue your uh... conversation.” 

Your jaw dropped, “Tasha I-”

Before you could protest Bakugo was up and hauled you over his shoulder, “Don’t have to fucking tell me twice. Good night Tasha! I’m sure I’ll see you soon!”

You waved at a laughing Tasha as you dangled over Bakugo’s shoulder. She just shook her head, “Be safe! Drink plenty of water! Remember to pee when you’re done!.. Oh and take snack breaks!”

You blushed so hard you were sure you were a darker shade of red than Bakugo’s eyes. 

He stepped outside and put you down on the sidewalk and reached for your hand. You walked in silence for what seemed like forever. His hand gave yours a gentle squeeze, “So are we going to talk about it oooooor?” 

You leaned into him a bit, “I guess I’m still trying to process everything.”

He tensed up a bit but tried to not let it show, “You’re not having second thoughts are you?”

You shook your head and snuggled further into his side, “Of course not I ju-”

He interrupted you, “Because I wouldn't blame you if you were. I know I’m an asshole. I know you deserve a lot more than me...”

You stopped walking dragging him to a complete halt along with you. You could see the apprehension in his eyes. He was nervous. THE Ground Zero was standing in front of you actually looking a bit scared. “Bakugo, how could you say that. You’ve done nothing but take care of me since I got here. You may not think so but you are patient, and kind, and caring. You just show it in weird ways. If anything I don't deserve you.”

He groaned and pulled you to his chest, “How many fucking times do I have to tell you that you deserve to be happy. You deserve the fucking world. You deserve to be loved, and protected, and cherished. So god damnit just LET ME...you stubborn woman”

You giggled as you gave his chest a kiss, “Enough of this heavy shit. Take me home.”

You see the tips of his ears turn the slightest shade of pink as he leaned down and connected your lips. “Already so bossy.”

You took his hand as you continue towards the apartment, “Already so whipped?” You playfully bumped his hip with yours. 

He scoffed, “I’ve been whipped since day one. Catch up.” 

You immediately changed into one of his hoodies as soon as you got home and he went strait to the kitchen to start cooking dinner. You strolled past him and opened the fridge to get something to drink. You leaned over a bit to reach a bottled water near the back of the fridge, when you heard him drop the spoon he had just been using onto the counter. “Pants Y/n... I know you own some because I was the one who bought them... yet. you dont seem to wear any... ever. Are you trying to kill me?”

You wiggled your butt as you leaned further to finally grab the water, “Well I didnt wear any before and I dont see the point in starting now...”

When you straightened up you realized he was now standing right behind you. “You also seem to only want to wear my clothes. Not that I’m complaining.” He pressed his chest against your back, his breath hot on your neck. 

You leaned into him, “The only thing more comfortable than your clothes.. is when you hold me at night when you think I’m asleep. Nothing beats your strong arms wrapped around me. That’s the only time I can really sleep. Other than that.. your clothes are a close second.” 

His hands dipped beneath the hem of his hoodie that you were wearing, “Well I don’t know if I like the competition...” His hands drifted upwards over your naked stomach, barely grazing the underside of your breasts before he yanked them back down and spun you around to face him. Pressing you into the fridge behind you and gave your forehead a sweet kiss. “I also think I need to feed you considering you didnt eat lunch earlier.” He gave you another kiss on your lips this time, “So stop teasing me before I burn the food.” 

You reached to your tippy toes and gave him a kiss on his nose. “I have no idea what you’re talking about. I just wanted a bottle of water. You're the one who can't seem to control himself.” 

You had no idea where this new found confidence was coming from. You hadn't had any experience in any of this before. Flirting? nope.. relationships? nope.... Sex? BIG NOPE. Yet here you are. Figuring it out as you go. Total trust that he’s not going to hurt you. You turned away from him and headed towards the kitchen table. His hand came out of nowhere and gave your ass a playful swat. Which he immediately regretted. “Hey, I’m sorry. Was that too much? I’m trying to go at your pace but sometimes my instincts take over and-”

“You’re fine. I’ll let you know if it’s ever too much. I’m not fragile.”

He returned to his cooking, “Believe me I know you’re tough. But I don’t want to accidentally take advantage of you.” 

You sipped on your water bottle while you thought about it. “Well I guess I’ll have to trust that your intentions are in the right place and you’ll have to trust that I’ll let you know when I’m feeling overwhelmed.” 

He nodded, “Well my intentions may not be as pure as you’re thinking...” He gave you a devilish smirk, “But I would never intentionally hurt you.” 

You bit your lip, “Well that’s all I ask.”

That night was the first night you slept in Bakugo’s bed. Sure there had been a few times you had woken up to him in your bed but never had you slept in his. You curled up to his chest and intertwined your legs. His lips found the top of your head and mumbled a good night before sleep found both of you. 

It didn’t take you long to realize you were in his dreams. He didn’t know you were there though and it felt like an invasion of privacy. But it was just too cute to not watch. He was dreaming of you... on a lazy day around the apartment. But before you knew it, it was shifting into more of a steamy dream... So you backed out and let him have his little fantasy. He deserved a good night sleep for once.

The next morning he was up bright and early. Off to work another day as Ground Zero. He showered you with kisses before he finally dragged himself out of bed and headed out. 

You slept for a few more hours before getting up yourself. Wrapped in a blanket you made your way to the living room with a cup of coffee and the newspaper. You really enjoyed doing crossword puzzles in the morning. Bakugo teased you about it and called you a nerd, but he secretly thought it was adorable. 

And so this became your routine. Every night he would make you dinner. You’d go to bed. Sometimes you’d make out for a bit but never more than that. Then in the morning you either got up and got ready for work together or you'd sleep in and do a crossword puzzle. A week had passed by like this and honestly you were pretty content. 

Today was no different. You were almost finished with your puzzle when the phone rang. You assumed it was just Bakugo checking in on you so you shuffled over to pick it up. 

“Hello?”

“Hi Y/n! It’s Tash.”

“Oh hey Tasha.. was I supposed to work today?”

“Oh no! You don’t work again until tomorrow night. There was just... uh. This guy who came in looking for you. It as kind of weird. He said he was friends with your mom? Were you expecting anyone?”

Your blood ran cold, “No... he said he knew my mom?”

“Yeah, said they used to do business together or something. I didnt tell him you work here or wear you live or anything. But I thought you should know. I kind of heard more of your conversation with Bakugo the other night than I should have. Y/n if your in some kind of trouble...” 

You sighed, “Thanks Tasha but its something I’m going to have to figure out on my own. Sorry I need to call Bakugo. I may not be able to make it in tomorrow...”

“I understand... Take care of yourself.” 

“I will. Let me know if he comes back.”

You hung up the phone and paced for a bit. You needed to call Bakugo but he was going to go into strait panic mode. You worked up the nerve and dialed his number. 

The phone rang a few times before you heard it connect but it wasn’t Bakugo’s voice on the other end...

“Hello there y/n, funny you’d call. Bakugo and I were just talking about you.”

You sighed in relief, “Hey Kiri.. Usually I’d love to help you embarrass our favorite hot head, but right now I really need to talk to him.” 

You heard a muffled ‘dumbass’ followed by a scuffle before Bakugo got to the phone. “Sorry about that. Shitty hair doesn't really have boundaries... What’s going on? Are you okay?”

When you didnt answer right away he grew nervous. “Y/n what's wrong?”

You were chewing on your lip so hard it began to bleed. A bad habit you thought you had gotten rid of. “I dont know how... but. I think they found me..”

“WHAT?! How? Why? Whats going on? Are they there? I’m coming home.”

You could feel your breathing start to tighten as you tried to hold your panic back, “No they’re not here. But someone came looking for me at the coffee house. Tasha called me. They said they did business with my mom...” 

Bakugo cleared his throat, “So you know then? About what your mom did?”

You sniffled, “Of course I know. I still remember her handing me over. Telling me they were friends and I was going to have so much fun at ‘camp’”

You wiped a tear from your cheek as a loud knock on the door pulled you away from your thoughts.

“What was that?” Bakugo barked through the phone. 

“Someones at the door..”

“Y/n.. for the love of god dont answer it. You hear me. I’m on my way.”

You approached the door and looked through the peephole. “Relax it’s just the food I ordered.” 

“I dont fucking care! There’s food in the kitchen! Dont answer the fucking door!” 

The person knocked again. He looked innocent enough. “It’s just food Bakugo.” You opened the door. You couldn’t hear what he was saying but he was definitely yelling on his end of he phone. 

You paid the man and shut the door. You brought the phone up to your ear and wished you hadn't because he was going on a tangent. “Your life is in danger and what do you do? YOU OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR FOR ANYBODY THAT HAS FOOD!” 

You rolled your eyes, “I ordered a pizza. Meat lovers just the way you like it. You can finish yelling at me when you get here.” You hung up. Which you regretted as soon as you did it. He was just trying to keep you safe. 

You tossed the pizza on to the kitchen table and took a seat. You were too anxious to even think about eating right now. What felt like only seconds later Bakugo was bursting through the front door. “Well it’s good to know that you opened the door and risked your life for a pizza you aren't even going to eat...” 

He took the seat next to you and pulled his chair over so he was right in front of you. He reached out and took your hands, “I know this is scary. I know you'd rather pretend it wasnt happening. But it is. And we need to figure our shit out okay? I’m not going to let anything happen to you. But you need to listen to me. I cant do what I need to do to keep you safe if you don’t listen.”

You wordlessly nodded your head.

He sighed and reached for the lid to the pizza box. “No reason to let this go to waste.”

He opened it up and paused, “Pack your shit we’re leaving...”

Your head snapped up, “What?”

He stood up and sprinted towards his room, “I said we’re leaving!”

You looked at the open pizza box and gasped. 

The underside of the lid had a message, “Not even Ground Zero can keep you safe.”

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Tags : @opentheskeletonkey​ @carolinawindsay​ @targaryens-blog​ @fukyouthink​ @malibusurfer56​ @theoneforallkiddeku​ @ilikeanimeandbands​ @dexterous-deku @joonishantics​ @-hiddlesdweeb-​ @crimson846​ @emotions-and-potions 

[sweater-daddiesdumbdork]

Fall Back to the Jet

Summary- Bucky x Y/N (Steve, Natasha, and Sam features) Cap tells you to fall back to the Quinnjet, but you decide on another option. Lucky Buckys close by. Warning- Violence, swearing. Written for @hopingforbarnes​ 250 Writing Challenge. Congrats!!!! Prompt is in bold italiacs. 

Word Count- 1.9k

It was all going smooth till Steve spoke directly to you in his com “Y/N, we have it from here, fall back to the quinnjet” 

You were still the rookie although its been a year, and Steve was the Captain, No one defies the captain, except for you. You eyed the open doorway the hydra agent just went into, taking a deep breath as your resolve settled, you werent going to sit on the quinjet any longer while the rest cleaned up. Ducking into the dark doorway, you stalked down the stairs while hearing your name being yelled at in the com “Y/N, I TOLD YOU TO FALL BACK” Sorry Cap, not this time. 

There are times in your life you maybe regret a decision, this was one of them. You thought the room was clear, sweeping your sights back and forth from the other end of a rifle, when there was a clip to the back of your head, knocking you forward and stupidly dropping your gun. “You Mother Fucker!” you yelp, and turn to face your opponent, twisting your head slightly to knock out the kink he put in your neck. He was well over twice your size, his meaty hands flexing to get around that slim column of your neck, you could see it in his eyes when he lunged at you, side stepping around him with a kick. It was like bouncing your foot off cement and didnt phase him much, smirking at you as he came at you again. “SHIT!” you state as you start blocking and trying to attack back. 

“Bucky you got her?” Steve hissed as they barged into a lab and Steve threw up the shield, blocking the barrage of bullets aimed at the two men. 

“Yea I got her” Bucky ducking behind the shield and once in a while lifting behind from it and aiming his own specially trained on targets rounds, he twisted away and went back out the way he came, using his vibranium arm to slam open doors to see them empty. “Come on Y/N, where the hell are you?” He snarled, until he heard you cussing out someone and the shallow sound of flesh getting pounded on. He hoped that it would be you doing the pounding, but when he opened the door, that certainly wasnt the case. 

Bucky came into you looking twisted around the mans arm, and him slamming you down into the floor, doing your best to keep your head from being bashed in, attempting a kick into his face, his throat, just about anywhere to get him to release his hold. Blood ran down the side of your face from your scalp and your words were flying just as much as anytime youve ever been pissed off, regardless of the situation. “If you dont let me the fuck go you dick wilted asswipe, Im gonna rip your balls off and stuff them down your throat.” If Bucky wasnt scared as hell for you at the moment, he would have rolled his eyes at you, once he realized the way you were being flung back and forth wasnt gonna allow him to take a shot, he shouldered the weapon.Close attack it would be 

Without another pause, Bucky strode forward, his strides wide and his metal arm slammed into the hyrdra agents side of the head, jarring his hand to open wrapped around your neck and you fell to the floor from a considerable height,snapping the back of your skull against the cement with a sharp cry. Rolling away from the two men clashing like titans above you. Bucky was shorter in stature then the hydra agent was, but much more quick on his feet, as well as being a super soldier, it wasnt exactly a fair hand on hand fight. Within minutes the agent was merely blocking the bone rattling blows Bucky was issuing, you were crawling across the floor to where you dropped your weapon, sitting back and putting it to your shoulder, waiting to get a clear shot.

Buckys silver hand wrapped around the back of the mans neck, the plates clinking as he tightened pressure and swung him around right in the aim of your shot, you lining hydra right up in your cross hairs, and pulling the trigger. Barnes turned his face away to keep from getting splattered from brain matter and blood. Loosening his hold, the hydras body, minus the top of his skull, collapsed with a dull thud. You lower the rifle and wince, placing your hand against your head. “Bucky... he got me pretty good.” Your vision going in and out at the moment. 

“Jesus Christ Doll” He hisses as he sidesteps around the body and goes to you, his hands cupping your face to look in your eyes. “Can you focus on me?” You blink a few times and wide eyed stare right at him best you can. 

“Hows that?” You question, grinning stupidly since your just glad Bucky got there in time. He frowned a bit and sighed, wrapping you in his arm to get you to stand. 

“Steve, I got her, Im taking her back to the Jet.” He spoke, not to you though and you didnt bother trying to get an answer. With his assistance, you two hobbled, less with sleuth, but with plenty of pauses for Bucky to check to make sure the coast was clear, the two of you headed outside. Sam was already in the jet, waiting on the two of you. 

“Steve and Nat are finishing up downloading the computer files, then they will join us. Come on Kid, I got a spot waiting for you.” 

“She had her head hit pretty badly” Bucky stated as you two followed Sam inside, going to sit you down, a wave of nausea threatened to upchuck whatever breakfast was, which what was that again? Oh yea, bowl of Wheaties, you remarking to Steve and Bucky this morning across the table. 

“Breakfast of Champs!” You werent exactly feeling like a champ right now. 

Sam looked you over to, prying one eyelid open, then the other. “I think shes going to be okay, but once we reach the compound we will be able to take a closer look.” Bucky settled in beside you and you pried them open once more. 

“Thanks for coming for me.” 

It was this moment Steve and Natasha returned, Steve snapping past you without acknowledging you at the moment. “Get us home Sam” his voice clipped, and Natasha plopped down next to you, her eyes brimming with worry. “Hey, we win some, we loose some right? You also got a hard head, I know.” She teased, having sparred and tumbled with you plenty of times. Steve stayed up at the front with Sam for the moment, but once he was sure you were okay, back home, you were most likely gonna get one of the famous Cap speeches youve seen him dish out to other agents. For now you were content to lay your head on Buckys shoulder, his hand resting against his knee, palm up. Without hesitating, you weave your fingers with his and he gives them a gentle squeeze. It might amaze others just how gentle he could be with that vibranium limb of his. Not you though. 

When the jet lands, you walk off, much more in control then before, but Bucky still hovers nearby and follows you into the medic bay. Quickly your head is checked over, a flashlight shining in your eyes, follow the finger, clean up the scrapes and blood. “Your gonna be dizzy for a few days, so nothing strenuous.” 

In this moment, you were okay with that. 

Steve came in, his demeanor still snapping in anger, but a touch calmer then before. He glanced at the medic and asked “Please, give us a few moments Ma’am, then you can have your patient back.” Bucky moved to take over bandaging the rest of you up as the medic left the room to the three of you. 

He looked at you, hands moving to rest against his hips as he seemed to asses you. “I heard your okay, Y/N. Good, you gave your team quite a scare.” You did have the audacity to look a bit sheepish, but felt the need to defend your actions. “I know, I honestly thought I had him.” 

“Thought, not good enough. Your still fairly new to the team...” This caused a look from you while Bucky patched up the back of your head as best he could. “So I think a bit more team building practices are in order Y/N. Until then, field work is off the table.” 

“What? Steve, come on.” You go to push Bucky back so you can stand up, but hes firm, firmer then you can give him credit for. “It was one mistake, I made a bad call.” 

“Yea, could have gotten you killed. Your always trying to think solo and you just cant. Were a team Y/N. We work together. Ive already made the decision.” 

You kinda gape as Steve turns to leave, fuming. You swear your heads going to blow like in those old bugs bunny cartoons where it goes off like a train whistle. “That son of a bitch just benched me. BENCHED ME!” This time you manage to move to a stand, about to storm off after Steve, but Bucky caught your arm and sat your ass back down. 

“Youve got to calm down before I can fix you up, Okay?” Bucky said calmly as he works diligently. His hands just as gentle as ever, you can barely even tell hes doing anything. You stay as still as you can, fighting back frustrated tears at the Captain benching you like this. Your tired and sore, your reaction just adding to your already bad day. “It was one mistake, one. I just hate always being told to go back to the jet when I could be helping you guys out. It was a bad call on my part, but fuck... I just wanted to be useful. I cant believe how bad this has turned into.” 

Bucky is silent for a moment before he pulls back and studies your face momentarily, and sighs. “Listen, I will talk to Steve, okay? Right now hes just being a dick. He will give everyone else crap about not following orders, but damned if he does.” You wipe at your face to get rid of the frustrated tears build up and arched your brows, hopeful. 

“You would really do that Bucky? If he says yes, I promise I wont mess up again.” 

“Course I would, and let me tell you, Steve wouldnt have listened either.” He went to pick up the tools and waste sitting on the table nearby, and scrubbed his hands clean. “Let him just cool off, hes probably speaking in worry as well Y/N. He doesnt always show it, but your just as much family as the rest of us.” 

Tentatively you go to stand, touching the bandages he finished securing gently and wincing. Without even asking he held out some aspirin that you popped immediately. “How about we go crash on the couch? You still owe me live commentary on that second little people going to drop some jewelry in a fiery hole movie. What was it again?”

This caused you to laugh. “The Twin Towers? Sounds good Bucky” 

@what-is-your-plan-today​ @official-and-unstable-satan​ @p8tn0lish​ 

[kilibaggins]

In This Together

Request: "I would like to request a Murphy/Emori with Spacekru while on the ring. Murphy has PTSD from Ontari's rape and he's depressed and cutting. Maybe do something where he tries to kill himself but Emori finds him and with support from his kru he gets better." - @warrier-queann

I’M REALLY NERVOUS I HOPE THIS IS GOOD lol

A/N- Thank you for being my first Request! I hope I write this properly! I hope it's not too OOC.

P.s- This is Canon-Divergent. He still splits from the team, but ge ends up going back with them in this, while that didnt happen in the show (at least on the Ring.)

Warning: Past Rape, PTSD, Self Harm which is pretty describd, Depression, Suicide Attempt, mentions Hanging, drinking, mentions of Floating(aka dying in space but you know that since you've watched the show lol).

Word Count: 2,298.. wow I got a little carried away lol.

Murphy isn't happy. That's no surprise to Anyone who understands the situation. He hasn't been happy for a long time. Heck, anyone who thinks that he's actually happy needs to get their people skills checked. He has so many trauma's under his belt that he could make almost anyone cringe at them. Which, some people in the past have. Emori used to be very open to listening to him, now she barley wants to look at him.

Murphy is laying on the cold, hard ground on his side of the ship, if he turns his head to the right he can see the Words "MURPHY'S SIDE, GO FLOAT YOURSELF" in big red letters, made in red paint that he made look like blood on purpose. He's not crazy. He knows hes not, no matter what the other think about him, and no matter what they whisper to each other when they pass his side. He's protecting himself. Protecting himself from the pain that they could cause him. He doesn't trust anyone, and the last person he trusted left him the moment he gave up on life.

He looks to his left and sees Earth. He scoffs as he thinks of how much he would rather be there than here. The place so many bad things happened to him on, is the same place he wishes he could be. He shakes his head and swallows the lump in his throat that always appears when he's thinking of the past.

He sits up and pushes his hair out of his face. He has let it grow since they've been here. It gets in his face all the time, but honestly he stopped caring a while ago. He grabs the bottle of alcohol he has by his little sleeping area and takes a big swig. It burns going down and he's honestly thankful for it. Otherwise he would actually believe he feels nothing other than emotional turmoil. He chuckles and grabs his knife staring at it with pain in his eyes.

He flicks it across the top of his hand lightly, watching as blood slowly makes its way out of the wound. He doesn't remember exactly when he started doing this, or when it became an actual problem, but he does know that it's been going on for a while. He can remember doing it while he was Stuck with Ontari. He remembers her touching the scars and fresh marks as if she cared, trying to coax him to do what she wanted without forcing it. It always felt wrong. He never wanted her touch, let alone having her touch the scars that show his pain.

Murphy knows he shouldn't think about her. He knows this is what happens every single time he does and nos he's spiraling again. Remembering her touch on his skin as he tried to play along with what she wanted. He remembers the fear that was forced into him as he laid there having to take what she gave him. He tried to think of Emori, but it never worked. He always knew it was Ontari.

Murphy tips his head back and gulps down a few drinks of Alcohol, throwing the bottle afterward in some direction he doesn't know exactly where honestly. He takes the knife, pulls up his Pant leg and cuts his Leg. The blood runs down it but he honestly doesn't care. He just lets it run onto his shoes, onto the floor. He chuckles darkly watching it flow. He closes his eyes just to feel a tear trail down his cheek. He makes a few more cuts on his leg watching as the blood falls together down on the ground.

He gets up, not Caring about the pulling of the wounds on his leg. He knows the others are down the hall. He could go to them, get the help he needs. But he won't. He won't risk being worthless to them again. He's just a waste of oxygen in his eyes. He doesn't help, that was the main reason Emori left him in the first place. He finds himself down the hallway closer to them than he has been in Months. But he knows hes not here for them. He turns to the side finally comprehending where he is. The Airlock. He pushes the red button opening it up and he hears the alarm start blaring, he forces his leg to work enough to walk through the door. He closes the door behind him. He hears yells outside because the comms are on.

"Where's Murphy?" He hears Raven yell. He scoffs and kicks the door. Its great that they care now where he is, it's honestly a little late for that. He's always wondered what being floated felt like. What his father went through for him. His personal theory is that it burns. The cold is so much that it just burns. But he never could find out. Now he can.

"John?" He hears Emori yell from outside. They'll be at the door soon. He can do it before they get there, before she gets there. He can't see them be happy over his death, it'll hurt him even more than ever. He turns to the red button and stares at it. His hand inches towards it and right before he pushes it he hears Emori screaming his name.

"John! Stop! What the hell are you doing?" She screams coming up to the door Banging on it harshly. He looks up at her, seeing she's as beautiful as she always was before. He looks down at the button then at her again.

"Doing what I have to." He says, his voice breaking as he does so. She shakes her head and he runs his hands through his hair turning away from the button.

"You don't NEED me! I'm a waste of space and you know it. I'm worthless! Let me go! You dont love me anymore anyways and I'm tired of this! I'm tired of the pain! I'm tired of feeling her hands on my skin every time i try to think of good things. Every time I think if you I think about her. I think about how I got hung, the torture. All of it. Because my brain with let me be happy! The thoughts won't just go away!" He screams, the tears he's been trying to hold back stream down his face. Emori looks at him in sadness and fear. He hears Heavy footsteps running down the hall towards them and he shakes his head. He grabs his hair and pulls, he realizes it grounds him slightly.

"John. Listen to me," She says lifting her Badass hand to the window in the door to the airlock. Murphy shakes his head looking down, his breath coming in quick bursts, "John! I'm NOT asking, and I'm definitely not joking around. Listen to me right now."

Murphy looks up to her and walks a bit closer to the glass between them. He lifts his hand and places it in the same spot Emori's is.

"Are you listening?" She waits for him to nod before she continues, "You aren't worthless, John. You never will be. You're just going through a rough spot right now, believe me it'll get better okay? Yes, I know you don't believe in all that fairy-tale bullshit, but I don't care. You're strong. You can fight this." She says Looking into his eyes.

"The memories won't go away." He says Looking at her with hope in his eyes. He reaches up to his throat and softly runs his fingers over it. He can Basically feel the rope around his neck. "I don't know what else to do."

"You fight, John. That's what you do. The memories might never go away but they'll get easier to deal with as time goes on. I'm not saying it'll be easy, because hell, I still have bad memories that plague my mind from a long time ago. But just because it's hard, that doesn't mean we should stop being strong.

"You are the strongest man I have ever met, John. You have been through so much, and you're still living with it, but this isn't the way to get through it. You need to fight it." She says breathing deeply, a determination set on her beautiful face.

"Will she ever go away...?" He asks softly deflating against the door. Emori's heart breaks seeing him like this. Seeing him completely broken. She regrets leaving him during this.

"Honestly? I'm not sure. Probably not. At least not right away. But it'll get EASIER. It'll never be perfect but it can get better. Let us help you. When you feel like she's here come to us and we can show you she's not. When you feel her touch and you need us to not touch you, tell us. Let us help you." She says staring at the red button. She hears Raven and Bellamy talking right out of sight, hoping that she could call for them in time if anything happens.

Murphy looks at her deeply and takes a few steps away from the door. The button is right next to him, right under his now outstretched fingertips. He hears Emori gasp and looks at her.

"John, please. We can work through this. All of us. I'm sorry I left you during this. I thought it was just you not Caring about anyone else, but I won't leave again." Emori says starting to tear up.

"Murphy? Hey, man." Bellamy says walking into the hallway where this is happening. "I'm here alright? You're not worthless. And I'm here, and so is everyone else, and we'll make sure you see that."

"Am... Am I broken?" Murphy asks his eyes tearing up again, he walks forward and leans his forehead against the glass. Emori shakes her head immediately and so does Bellamy who's trying to stay farther away than her.

"No, John. John, you're not Broken. You've just been through so much. You'll be alright." Emori says trying to smile in a way she hopes is assuring. She doesn't really know how to feel. She knew about Murphy's self harm issues but she never thought it would spiral all the way to him breaking like this.

"This-" Murphy sighs heavily and his eyes tear up. "This is going to change everything." Murphy finished his sentence and hits his hand against the glass. He pushes the "Open" button of the door separating him from Emori. He takes a few steps and Basically falls into her. Emori holds him close, not wanting to let go of the Man she almost lost. He falls to the ground and so does she, holding him the whole way there.

"It'll be alright, My Cute Thief." Emori says sweetly into his hair as he cries into her neck. She holds him close and Bellamy leans into the wall behind him relieved that Emori could stop him in time. Emori gets up dragging Murphy up with her.

"Let's get you some water alright?" She whispers to him. Murphy nods and clings onto Emori's shirt, following as she walks forward into the main area, where they can grab Murphy some water. Monty And Harper are sitting at a table close by looking on with concern in their eyes. Emori just nods slightly at them and grabs a cup. Murphy doesn't move from where Emori left him when she went to get water. He looks down to his feet and He hears Monty get up from his spot at the table.

"Hey, Man. How you doing?" Monty asks slowly Rising his hand up. Murphy sees it coming and nods slightly at it. Monty puts his hand on hsi shoulder and squeezes. "We're here for you man. You're not alone. I lost Jasper this way and... I'm not letting something like that happen again."

Murphy swallows the lump that formed in his throat and a sob comes out of his mouth, tears still falling. He leans into Monty then, causing Monty to gasp and hug him back. Emori comes back up to them and smiles sadly at the two men. Harper walks up and puts his hand on Murphy's shoulder, to show her support.

"We're here." Harper says softly.

"We're all in this together, man. We just have to stay strong and survive this. It's what Clarke would have wanted." Bellamy says from a few feet away, not Wanting to interrupt too much. He remembers the night he hung Murphy. In explicit detail. Every movement Murphy made, everything. It's hurts to think he made that mistake, which causes Murphy so much pain. Murphy just nods and steps away from Monty.

"Heh, sorry there man. Shirts a little wet." Murphy chuckles out wiping at Monty's shoulder. Monty just shakes his head and pats The other Man's Hand. Echo is sitting at the far end of the table and her and Murphy make eye contact. They nod st each other, in some sort of Unspoken conversation.

"Come on, let's get you cleaned up and to sleep, we'll get your stuff from the side in the morning." Emori says leaning up and kissing Murphy softly on the Cheek. Murphy smiles and buries hid face in the beautiful women in front of him.

While Emori drags him to their old room, from when before she ended things before, Murphy thinks. He thinks about what the future may hold and the pain he will have to experience. He knows it won't go away, but he also knows he has Emori to help. He has Bellamy, Monty and Harper... And even Echo. He has them. He can get help, and even though the pain worn go away completely, they'll help him live with it.