#and dazai being a mentor to atsushi and kyouka :(

[rintoorou]

omg bsd enjoyer?? i actually did not expect that. who r ur faves/any ships? ive been rly enjoying ur work so i js wanted to ask, do u have any plans on releasing bsd content? !!

I LOVE MY MAN DAZAI OSAMU SO MUCHHH 😭 like i just love his complexity as a character ?? i can't explain it but he's just so intriguing to me..... never talk to me abt beast!dazai bc i will sob

honestly i could not pick a fav ship bc they all hit hard differently ?? LOL but i have sm saved edits of soukoku (OFC)

HMM BSD CONTENT . like an smau or smth written? tbh i have sm made up scenarios in my head i just can't find the heart to write them bc i'm scared i won't do them justice 😭 but some day, dear anon... some day

[mystwrites]

Tickletober Day 3: Prank

Fandom: BSD

Lee: Dazai

Ler: Atsushi

A/N: I only did 2 fics for Tickletober cuz I’m placing my studies first. Everything is queued for the respective day. I hope you enjoy my 2 short fics!

“Dazai san! I have a magic trick to show you!!” Atsushi exclaimed, gathering all of the Agency members into the main office. “Come and stand in front of me!”

“Come on, Dazai san!” Kenji urged, jumping up and down.

“Yeah! It’s a good one!” Junichiro added, sending Kyouka a wink as she stifled a laugh.

Curious, Dazai obeyed and stood by Atsushi, allowing the younger to position him how he wanted to. He then saw a broom in Atsushi’s hand, even more curious as to what exactly the magic trick entailed.

Kunikida was mildly interested only because Atsushi said he was going to torment Dazai for a bit. If Atsushi was going to torment Dazai, there was no way Kunikida could not watch. He sort of enjoyed watching Dazai get humbled by Atsushi whenever the kid decided that he had enough shenanigans for one day.

Junichiro, Kenji, Ranpo, Kyouka and Naomi all had their phones out and laughed softly amongst each other while Yosano just stood by her office, possibly hoping Dazai being the idiot he was somehow injures himself in the process of the magic trick.

“What do you want me to do, Atsushi kun?” Dazai asked, letting Atsushi raise his arms slightly.

“Put your arms out to the side. I’m going to slide this broom into your sleeves!” Atsushi said, swiftly sliding the broom into the sleeves of Dazai’s coat. “Wait…shoot! It’s stuck! Someone help!”

Seeing that the broom was stuck, Kyouka and Kenji rushed over to assist. Kenji pushed the broom stick up and Kyouka assisted Atsushi by pulling on the end that finally poked out from Dazai’s left side.

When the broom poked out of the opposite end, Atsushi had to silently laugh and turned away from Dazai to face Kenji and Kyouka, the two also laughing silently. Dazai had no idea what was about to hit him.

“All set.” Kyouka said, winking at Atsushi who winked right back.

“Okay, the broom is in my sleeves. Now what?” Dazai asked. “Do I flap like a bird?”

“No! You’re gonna break the broom, you idiot!” Kunikida scolded, giving Dazai a glare as the man smirked. “Listen to Atsushi.”

“A-And now you gotta say the magic words.” Atsushi stammered, trying to hide his laugh.

“What are the words?” Dazai wondered. “It must be silly if you’re trying not to giggle. Hey! Tanizaki kun! Kyouka chan! Don’t record this!”

Kyouka and Junichiro laughed and ignored Dazai. If he filmed them getting pranked or bothered, why should they stop?

Atsushi giggled and shook his head. “Th-the words are broom, broom abracadabra. Say that and watch as magic appears before your eyes, Dazai san!”

Chuckling as he watched Atsushi act extravagant by doing some jazz hands, Dazai shook his head and ultimately decided to indulge in this silliness. It was rare for the weretiger to engage in such silly antics. Might as well take the opportunity to be silly with him, right?

“Broom, broom abracadabra.” Dazai said, knowing no actual magic would happen.

Upon hearing the words, Atsushi shoved his hands under Dazai’s now exposed armpits, gently scribbling his fingers lightly against the clothed skin, laughing just as hard and loud as Dazai who instantly screeched and collapsed onto the floor. With the brunette down, the office erupted into fits of hard laughter much to Atsushi’s happiness. He made their dull, boring office day lively and exciting!

“Way to go, Atsushi kun!” Yosano exclaimed, giving him a thumbs up.

“You caught Dazai off guard again!” Ranpo added, laughing as Dazai hiccuped. “I thought you couldn’t pull another feat like that but I guess I was wrong! Haha!”

“Way to go, kid!” Kunikida praised, more than amused at the sight. “Don’t let up until he agrees to do all of his work for the day. He’s been slacking off too much as of lately.”

“Yes sir!” Atsushi said, giving the blonde a salute before continuing to tickle his mentor. “Tickle, tickle, tickle!~”

“A-Ahahaha!! Atsu-Atsushi ku-UUHUHUHUHUN!!!” Dazai cried, laughing as Atsushi continued tickling him. “ATSUSHI KUN AHAHHAHAA!! NO!! THIHIS ISN’T A MAHAHAGIC TRICK!!”

“You’re right.” Atsushi laughed, sitting behind Dazai and tickling his armpits relentlessly. “This was a prank I saw on social media. Ahhahaa!! You fell for it too!”

“BUHUHULLYING!! YOHOHOU’RE BUHUHULLYING MEHEHEHEE!” Dazai wailed, laughing as Atsushi dug in a little harder.

“Maybe, but you’re the one who “bullies” me, Dazai san.” Atsushi argued, now really tickling Dazai. “I’m getting my revenge for all the times you tickled me…and this is also for Kunikida san who wants you to finish all your work without asking me to do it.”

Dazai whined and continued to laugh, now leaning on Atsushi’s legs. His feet began to kick out and the others all laughed at his expense, neither joining in nor helping him. Atsushi then started to jump around between tickling around Dazai’s ribs before shoving his hands back into the man’s armpits, Dazai a whole mess of wheezes, snorts and loud, hysterical belly laughter.

“Well, it certainly looks like Dazai will be doing all of his papers soon.” Yosano whispered, giggling as Dazai admitted defeat, using his foot to stomp the floor three times.

“Yep. And he better do a damn good job too.” Ranpo added, sucking on his lollipop. “The president says he’s behind by nearly half a year’s worth of reports not including the ones he forced Atsushi kun to do.”

“I…aaahaha! I’ll g-get to wohohork!” Dazai wheezed, sighing with relief as Atsushi removed the broom stick from his sleeves.

“Oh? And when are you going to start?” Kunikida asked.

“L-later toni-AAAHA!! NONONO!” Dazai cried, Atsushi’s fingers gently scribbling along his ribs. “NOW! IHIHI’LL DO THEHEHE PAPERWORK NOHOHOW!!!”

“Good! And don’t ask me for help.” Atsushi added, giggling and running away before Dazai could get his revenge.

Just then, Fukuzawa walked into the room, looking at Dazai who curled up on the floor. He looked at Kyouka who handed him her phone and watched the video of their antics from earlier. Looking up, Atsushi was at his desk, being a good employee while Dazai remained on the floor.

“I can finally die now!” the brunette cried with glee.

A simultaneous groan escaped from everyone in the office and Fukuzawa handed Kyouka her phone back, silently walking out like he didn’t just witness chaos in his own workplace along with hearing Dazai’s suicidal antics.

[valverii]

Hey I love your switch AU mainly bc Chuuya being a better mentor for Atsushi than Dazai was gives me life, can you give me more insight on them? How did Chuya figure out Atsushi was the tiger? When Atsushi went feral did Chuuya just, float him in the air until he calmed down or smth? Would Chuuya kick Akutagawa’s ass if he saw him trying to pick a fight with Atsushi bc ‘HEY LEAVE MY KID ALONE FUCKER’? How does he react to Atsushi adopting Kyouka as his sister after he gets on a train with Yosano that also has a terrorist on it? How does he feel that Atsushi keeps getting into trouble while he tries to ease him in with simple missions?

ofc!! this is gonna b a longer one so we’re gonna do this mini style

(how did chuuya figure out atsushi was the weretiger/how did he calm him down?)—he sniffed cat on atsushi on their first meeting. so when he went berserk in weretiger mode, he just set down a Very Large Cardboard box and trapped him by floating him with his ability until the morning.

(how would chuuya react to akutagawa picking a fight with atsushi?)—obnoxiously. atsushi has to hold him back from making promises he can’t fulfill.

(how does chuuya react to atsushi adopting kyouka after the train mission with yosano?)—he doesn’t have it in him to be surprised anymore

(how does chuuya feel about atsushi getting into so much trouble despite trying to ease him in with easy missions)—he’s pulling out his hair. he doesn’t know how atsushi is a magnet for trouble but he has a sneaking suspicion that a scheming brunet is to blame for it.

[starlightshadowsworld]

The Fallen King

The easiest and simplest way to explain why Beast Dazai treated Beast Atsushi the way he did.

Despite caring about him.

Is that Beast Dazai has never seen Beast Atsushi as human.

From the beginning Beast Atsushi was a means to an end and a pawn in a much larger plan.

Beast Dazai would never have considered that Beast Atsushi would stay in the Port Mafia after his death.

He would never have considered that Beast Atsushi would ever become the next Port Mafia Boss.

And that’s because Beast Dazai broke him down. He made Beast Atsushi rely on and think he was nothing without Beast Dazai.

He was sought out for his power and his loyalty.

Beast Atsushi is not smart, he can’t strategise or think for himself. He only will if it concerns Beast Kyouka and if she’s told to leave with him there’s no reason for him to stay in the Port Mafia.

That’s what Beast Dazai believed and he was wrong.

We see from the start of this fic that Beast Atsushi can strategise, that he can plan ahead on the spot.

He decided minutes after his mentors death to be the next boss. And came up with the cover story during the meeting that was enough of the truth it didn’t feel like a lie.

It’s kinda like how in Fifteen Dazai is tricked by Chuuya because Chuuya knows Dazai sees him as nothing but a loud angry kid.

He uses that to hide that he’s Arahabaki despite Dazai actively searching for Arahabaki.

It’s like how Dazai knows Fyodor will be tricked by Chuuya because of how similar he is to how Dazai used to be.

Both of them so smart that they can’t imagine being wrong, they can’t imagine a situation where they aren’t the ones in control.

And that is what is happening here.

Beast Dazai never considered Beast Atsushi would ever defy him after that one time. He believed he broke this boy down to be his loyal pawn.

Despite the fact Beast Dazai had memories showing him Bsd Atsushi’s heart and strength.

That he’s very loyal and would never choose to abandon his friends to save himself.

He never considered that would happen here because he believed he succeeded in breaking those parts of Beast Atsushi.

And turning them entirely to him and no one else.

Beast Atsushi said it himself that Beast Dazai gave him a name and a purpose.

That was all Beast Atsushi was supposed to exist for so why ever consider that he could ever become something more.

That he was simply a dog following commands rather than a free thinking human.

Beast Dazai cares for Beast Atsushi but he knows nothing about him other than what can be used to serve his purpose and his goals.

He cares about him enough to give him a place in the light but never considers that Beast Atsushi can thrive in the darkness, because he never let him.

Beast Chuuya is unquestionably human to Beast Dazai. But Beast Atsushi has been nothing but a beast from the start.

[kaurwreck]

How do you see Kyōka relationships in port mafia was?

Because she apparently was trained by Verlaine, was mentee(?) to Akutagawa and had a specific relationship with Kōyō.

Why were so many involved with her..

Kouyou saw herself in Kyouka and possesses a similar skill, and so attempted to nurture/shelter her to the extent that she could and she likely also provided Kyouka with insight into her skill.

Verlaine trains the assassins with an aptitude for infiltration. This is an inference, but a reliable one thus far based on: (1) he explicitly trained Gin and Kyouka, both of whom explicitly kill by infiltration and escaping without being caught (see: Tachihara describing Gin's modus operandi when Gin had a knife to Higuchi's throat, Kouyou describing Kyouka's talents in that regard when speaking to Atsushi at the Agency, and Kyouka's talent for memorizing layouts and routes); (2) Verlaine similarly relied on infiltration when he was King of Assassins (see: how he killed the Flags, how he intercepted Chuuya, how he made it as far as the Queen of England's body double); and (3) he didn't train Akutagawa, who is also an assassin, but one whom operates bombastically/with the intent to make a spectacle (which is why he's sent after traitors (see: 55 Minutes) and threats to the Port Mafia's operations (see: his first appearance).

Kyouka explicitly approached Akutagawa and asked him to kill Demon Snow and then her. Akutagawa saw himself in her, and promised to give her a sense of purpose in an attempt to do for her what Dazai did for him. It also seems like Akutagawa might have been the one to accompany her in the actual field, which would make sense considering he is the subexecutive in charge of the assassin field operatives like Black Lizard as opposed to Kouyou, who leads the torturers, and Verlaine, who doesn't do fieldwork.

There were so many people involved with her because they each had their own relationship with her, and that's how it works for literally everyone. At the risk of overgeneralizing experiences, I will assume you went to primary school. Did you have only one teacher, for the entirety of your primary school career? Did you have only one older child that you knew? In any workplace you may have been in, did you have only one co-worker? Has more than one person taught you the myriad things that you know, or given you advice, or provided some form of mentorship?

Akutagawa was Dazai's kouhai, and answers to Mori, but Chuuya canonically bathes him and is affectionate towards him. Chuuya was placed beneath Kouyou's direct command, but mentored beneath Mori and was paired with Dazai, as well as a member of the Flags, usually Albatross. Dazai was Chuuya's partner, but he spent much of his time with Ango and Oda. Hirotsu is Gin and Tachihara's immediate superior, but he drinks with Chuuya and Kajii, and accompanies Mori as a friend and confidante. Verlaine is Chuuya's European older brother, but Gin and Kyouka's teacher. Kouyou adores Kyouka, but she was Chuuya's superior and mentor, and then his peer.

They all have a myriad of relationships within the Port Mafia, it would be odder if Kyouka didn't.

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

I wanted to give my own quick interpretation of the scene where Atsushi... imagines? hallucinates? all those people while conflicted over what to do in the most recent chapter, because idk I haven't seen people talk about it that much?

See, the whole conflict with Atsushi in this arc is that he's replaced the constant demeaning of the orphanage director in his head with encouragement from his mentor, and he can control the tiger, and he supports the people around him... but Kunikida makes a point of saying (before everything went to shit) that while Atsushi's tiger is strong, he himself is still weak.

I don't think this has to do with Atsushi's character per se. I think it more so has to do with his still very simplistic views on people or the world - things are very black and white, good or bad. And when faced with a problem without a simple solution, Atsushi's unfortunate tendency is still to freeze up. This is not surprising - he may be 18, but he's a very... how do I put this... a very young 18. He hasn't had anyone teach him these things or guide him. He very much craves support and encouragement from others. He likely also didn't see much of the world outside the orphanage before he was kicked out either. And let's not forget how absolutely shot his self-esteem is. The fact that Atsushi functions and believes in the best in people as well as he does is testament to how kind-hearted and resilient of a person he is.

But here's the problem: Atsushi's self-confidence hasn't done much developing.

What Atsushi has learned throughout the story is how incredible the Agency as a whole is, and as he grows to learn and care about them and realize that he has been given a place to belong, he grows to support them in turn; pulls his weight in a number of increasingly badass ways (he caught a bullet with his teeth. GODDAMN). But all that confidence goes away the moment he is left alone. Atsushi has confidence in his own strength in a group - and only in a group.

Unfortunately, the Agency, though I believe well-intentioned, kind of enables this mentality in him. We see Ranpo, Kunikida and Kyouka in turn, who echo things they have said and would say to this situation.

"Don't you even know that?" Ranpo would ask this, rhetorically, and then solve it himself. Atsushi would not have time to come up with an answer of his own.

"Failure is unacceptable." Kunikida would say this and then act, no matter what. Atsushi would be left to follow what he does.

"You don't have to do anything." Kyouka would protect him. Atsushi wouldn't have to do anything because she would grab his arm and take over from there.

See what's happening here? These are no longer demeaning words from the headmaster (in fact, I want to reiterate that I believe they are all well-intentioned), but they still insinuate that Atsushi is incapable on his own. And indeed it's interesting that Atsushi sees these "visions" of Dazai guiding him all throughout the hunting dogs, sky casino and decay of angels arcs. I, for one, think this is just Atsushi's imagination and not a real vision (unless we get some evidence to the contrary in the future) but for now, it implies that Atsushi's self-confidence is still so abysmal that he has to imagine someone giving him advice and advising him on what to do - instead of being able to consciously admit these ideas are his own.

And then Fitzgerald shows up - "No one expects anything from you." Looming over him, a symbol of power and status over the panicked, conflicted form of a boy who feels eternally powerless without support.

And then it gets interesting.

Akutagawa shows up in Atsushi's mind, for the first time in a guiding role, not a demeaning one. And there's a definite reason for this - when Atsushi was all alone, when he admitted to himself he had no idea what to do and was terrified to be left to fight with no one else with him - who showed up?

Akutagawa. Akutagawa, who in spite of everything, fought by his side and was reliable. And the thing is, Akutagawa cannot take over, not in their kind of plans, or they just won't work. They have to work together. They have to be equals. And on some level, I think this part shows Atsushi's realization of the rather surprising amount of trust Akutagawa had to have placed in him - and him alone. I find it rather heartbreaking that Atsushi appears to have just now started to realize this after their plan failed due to a lack of trust (mostly on his side I'd say) and Akutagawa died.

So, Atsushi receives guidance from Akutagawa, and of course, from Dazai, the person he is extremely grateful for as a mentor. They don't tell him what to do. But still, Atsushi is guided into looking - "get out of your head" and moving - "the door is right there - do something about it". These "visions" still spur Atsushi into action, but the action itself? It's Atsushi's alone.

Atsushi still needs to justify his actions by imagining others giving him support, but this is definite progress for him restoring a sense of personal... agency (see what I did there?) within himself.

And yes, his eventual course of action is to find Fukuzawa and have him make the final decision on the matter - but really now, he's just been told something that apparently has Teruko (who I am certain is older than much of the cast and likely a former soldier from the war) drained and tired and seemingly conflicted herself - this isn't really the kind of issue you want to be deciding on all by yourself. Also, admitting you don't know what to do but moving forwards anyways to actively ask for advice or help is very much still making a decision and moving forward. Actively asking someone what they think about a complex situation is very different from being passive while others take control around you.

Atsushi made the decision to walk out that door into uncertainty. And I am convinced he's going to have to pick a course of action anyways - as of right now, Fukuzawa is out of commission, as are Dazai, Akutagawa, Ranpo and Kunikida (we don't know where Kyouka is yet).

It's been a long time coming, but this is serious progress for his character.

[youroriginalsublimecupcakestuff]

Kunikida, annoyed and blushing : " dazai when you told us that you have been made aware of a nefarious plot of the port mafia who threaten Yokohama safety, i expected something else."

*dazai with his binoculars busily observing a shirtless chuuya crushing a watermelon with his thight then turn to kunikida*

Dazai, primly : " It's very important for Yokohama safety Kunikida-kun we're in the side of good if poor unassuming citizen have to be cursed with such sight it will be a threat to their sanity, we have to protect them obviously seriously Kunikida-kun "

Dazai turn to atsushi and kyouka :" Be like atsushi-kun and kyouka-chan who understand the importance of this mission, look how seriously atsushi-kun is doing his task you should be like him ".

Atsushi who's intently watching akutagawa and notice that they're talking about him : " dazai-san is right kunikuda-san it's important to know more about the enemy."

Kunikida, sigh : " nothing can be done with atsushi brain cell with him unfortunately being contaminated by having this waste of space as a mentor but i expected more of you kyouka."

Kyouka, unrepentant : " Dazai-san promised me to buy to buy me crepe if i took good photos."

[hannigramislife]

hello again :DDDD my friend found this image in the wild today and we had a fun time discussing the many ways in which he was not the many things this image claims him to be. considering your recent media literacy posts i think you’ll have fun taking a look at this lol

have a great day as always! :))

Yes, hi, I'm actually gonna kill myself 🙂 thanks for ruining my day, I guess?? 🤣

Let's go one by one, okay?

"Incredibly smart and kind of terribly pathetic," this one is accurate as fuck, moving on.

"Men who are good with kids," I just physically can't see what people mean when they say this about Dazai. I've seen it often. I do not understand it in the slightest. He never asked Oda about the orphans who were so important to him. He never interacted with Kyouka as an adult and a child, he spoke to her as a mafia member reformed, and that was it. He never really interacted with Kenji either?? We didn't see him have any close relationship with Gin, the child he brought into the mafia, and it's known that he hurt Q. "You haven't read his entrance exam," quite frankly, I don't give a fuck. I have met Akutagawa.

"Men who get bullied by kids," he doesn't get nearly as bullied as he ought to. Please, please, please God, let Kyouka and Atsushi drain his bank account.

"Men who eat glass," Dazai biting the curb in 4k when?

"Men who are so kind and pure-hearted," lmaooo, this one I can't even take seriously. You can't be for real. This man wouldn't know kindness if he hung out at a bar with it every single day. Be so fucking for real. People confuse what being kind even really means. Being kind means being considerate of other people by nature. Every morally good decision Dazai makes is of conscious effort, because this man has never been kind just because he felt it. He doesn't feel it, that's the whole point. He has learnt to care for people, true, but by God, the man is not kind. Learn the meaning of words before you throw them out anywhere.

Yes, he's a bitch, next part–

"Bisexual men," yes, absolutely.

"Men who are dilfs," how dare you disrespect the actual dilfs all across the multiverse. Dazai is not a dilf. He has never known what raising and caring for a youngster means. Oda is a dilf. Kunikida is a dilf. Fukuzawa is also a dilf. Dazai barely qualifies as an adult. I wouldn't trust him with a sack of flour. He's a walmart Kisuke Urahara. He's what you give kids when they're like "We want a Gojo-like mentor!" and you say "We have Gojo-like mentors at home."

People assume I don't understand the guy– that's not true, believe me when I say there is nothing someone can tell me about Dazai that I haven't already thought and considered. I am even sympathetic to aspects of his personality that I dislike, but I understand them.

Doesn't change the fact that he's a bitch 😒

[jinko-hellhound]

a pinch — bungou stray dogs — atsushi & dazai (platonic!)

atsushi is having an awful night, and his mentor comes to bother him. a short, definitely non-comprehensive exploration of atsushi and dazai’s dynamic, platonic touch, and emotional vulnerability. originally written for @dazaibirthdayweek2024 (and being archived here on my new fic blog)!

words: 2,170

first published: 6/16/24

relationships: dazai osamu & nakajima atsushi

tags: fluff and angst, platonic relationships, implied/referenced child abuse, dazai osamu is a mess, nakajima atsushi needs a hug, post-traumatic stress disorder, childhood trauma, no romance, beast beneath the moonlight, no longer human

crossposted on ao3

The Agency dorm’s walls are paper-thin, so when Dazai comes lumbering up the steps, Atsushi hears it. Hears Yosano, too, yelling out her window for Dazai to Shut the fuck up, I’m trying to sleep!, and Dazai’s cheerfully slurring response. Somewhere further down, Kunikida’s door slams open. Dazai’s voice erupts into pure glee.

Atsushi groans into his couch cushion. This is not the night for this. It’s — not been a good day. Nothing bad happened. It’s just that he woke up wrong. He woke up scared, with the Headmaster’s breath chilling the back of his neck. He was… off, at work. No cases today, but there was always busywork to slog through, piles of it. And even on a good day paperwork was awful, but today he’d felt there was an irremovable film over his eyes, hazing his vision. It took him far too long to process anything said to him, enough that Kunikida had started speaking slowly and carefully in a way that made Atsushi want to crawl into a hole.

And then Atsushi had trudged home. Kyouka went off to spend the night with Naomi, which was — nice. Good. Atsushi wanted Kyouka to make more friends, to hang out like a normal teenage girl… but now Atsushi was alone in this cold dorm. The dorm was always quiet, but never this silent, absent of the soft patter of Kyouka’s feet, or the way she hums just to make her presence known and avoid scaring Atsushi out of his skin. And any other day, that would have been fine. Atsushi is eighteen. He can spend a night in his own home alone. But tonight… Tonight, he curls around a throw pillow on his couch, face shoved into the cushion, and shakes.

Why is he crying? He isn’t sure. It could be any number of things. It could be phantom static electricity ghosting up his spine; it could that awkward spot on his foot, which he always avoids as though it still has a nail hammered through it; it could be the phantom pains of his own limbs that had been lost-regrown-lost-regrown again in the last year; or maybe any number of deaths, be they cold corpses he’d stumbled across or bullets he’d watched land. And those last two are the worst, maybe, because those things are his job. And if he couldn’t even handle doing his own job—

Dazai’s giggling floats towards his door. Atsushi tenses. Not tonight, please God. He can’t deal with the drunken antics tonight.

The giggling floats on past and Atsushi relaxes. But he should have known better. It’s only a few seconds before Dazai backtracks — so quick, it sounds like, that he trips and catches Atsushi’s doorknob to stay up.

Rattling the doorknob, Dazai calls, “Atsushiiii!”

“I’m asleep!” Atsushi calls back, not even bothering to pretend. Chances were Dazai had done something insane, like perfectly memorizing Atsushi’s sleep habits or catching how one particular particle of light fell under the door, and figured out that Atsushi was wide awake. “Go away, Dazai!”

“Noooooo,” Dazai whines. There is the distinctive clicking sound of a lock being picked. Dazai doesn’t even need to pick it — he’s the only other member of the Agency who has his own key to Atsushi’s dorm. Dazai hums a jaunty tune while he works. Atsushi considers hiding, but Dazai is quick, and by the time Atsushi’s foggy brain thinks of a hiding spot, the door is already creaking open. Atsushi decides to just keep his red, snotty face firm in the cushions and ignore Dazai until he gets bored.

“Hellooooooo,” Dazai croons, flicking Atsushi’s lights on. Without looking at him, Atsushi can imagine the way he twirls around the dorm, all those dramatic movements he likes to distract with. Dazai must be stumbling, though. There’s a thud somewhere near the kitchen counter, and a pained grunt. “Why’re you sleeping on the couch?”

“It’s my couch.” The sharp clinking of glass, something pouring. Atsushi groans again. “I can sleep on my couch.”

Dazai’s footsteps, clumsy in a way Atsushi can’t place (is it an act? accidental? something Dazai simply isn’t trying to hide?), round the couch. He taps at Atsushi’s leg and Atsushi, begrudging and reluctant as he is, has a child in his soul. So he pulls his legs up, knees nearing his chest. The couch protests the way Dazai falls into it. “Don’t break my couch,” Atsushi grumbles, with no heat. Dazai hums.

Even with his knees drawn up, Atsushi’s feet push against Dazai’s thigh, and suddenly Atsushi feels too big. Like he’s become twice as heavy as he is. The couch creaks underneath him, the floor creaks under the couch. He imagines his body expanding, ripping through his clothes. He imagines his veins bulging, his arms taking on that awful, sinuous look they always do in between human and not, a phase which is usually too short for anyone to see but him. But instead of transforming into Byakko, his imaginary limbs stay stuck there in that in-between – unnatural, painful. Awkward and lumbering.

This, of course, doesn’t happen. He is 5’7, 59 kilograms. His knees are knobbly and his wrist bones pop out too much, although he’s gotten a bit stockier than he used to be. He’s not abnormally heavy, hardly monstrous. And he’s firmly Atsushi, now. (Firmly Atsushi, except for that bit of Byakko that’s always in the back of his head, her worries and wants. Right now, she’s thinking: Dazai. She’s never very specific with her thoughts – it could be a cheer. It could be a warning.) And anyway, Byakko couldn’t come out, because Dazai’s cold hand is resting on Atsushi’s ankle.

…Dazai’s cold hand is resting on Atsushi’s ankle, Atsushi processes belatedly. Which is – fine. Dazai is touchy. Maybe not so much with Atsushi, because – well. Atsushi doesn’t always like it. Sometimes it scares him. But Atsushi is used to Dazai ruffling his hair, throwing an arm around his shoulder, knocking his knuckles against his forehead. Fleeting touches, that is. Contact that leaves as soon as it arrives. And Atsushi is fine with it. He doesn’t feel any particular sort of way about it.

(Liar. Cut back to the very first month Atsushi knew Dazai. The way Dazai, at some point a couple weeks in, jokingly reached over to ruffle Atsushi’s hair, coo-ed about him like he was a child. Atsushi, much more nervous back then, had blustered and stammered and flushed and – critically – pushed his head up into Dazai’s hand like the idiot he was. Dazai, for once sparing Atsushi’s feelings, said nothing aloud. But the repeats of that particular gesture came often. And Atsushi found himself, stupidly, awaiting them. Craving them.)

The point is that this is uncommon. Dazai’s touch never lasts, not unless he’s joking with someone – draping himself over Kunikida to annoy him, pushing into Ranpo’s space to banter. This isn’t a joke. This is Dazai, sat quietly on Atsushi’s couch, listening to nothing but breathing, his hand settled on Atsushi’s ankle.

They are silent for so long that Atsushi almost thinks he is hallucinating again. What other reason would there be for Dazai to be here, sitting in gentle silence? It’s unusual for him not to talk. Babbling or nagging or deadly serious, but always something. Dazai talked so much, so incessantly, that he’d practically become Atsushi’s inner monologue. Yes, Dazai was acting so out of character now that Atsushi really did, for a moment, think he was hallucinating. It would be a nice change of pace, for his imagination to give him something like this.

But his hallucinations would never be so kind as to linger. To comfort so softly. To let him sit here with that calming touch and peaceful silence and nothing else. This is real. And it’s this understanding that has Atsushi lulling into – not sleep. Some kind of reverie. The sobbing-induced migraine fades from behind his eyes and nose, ever so slightly. He drifts, between Byakko’s corner of his mind (Dazai, she is rumbling, echoing about his brain) and that ice-cold touch on his ankle. Back and forth, temple to ankle, like a hammock on a warm day. Dazai’s touch always grounds Atsushi. It doesn’t make Byakko go away – no, that would be terrifying, even more terrifying than losing control of her, running a rampage. But Dazai…quiets her, in a way. Soothes her.

Dazai’s glass clinking against the table snaps Atsushi back into reality. He suddenly becomes aware again of the slightly dusty smell of the cushion he’s crammed his face against, and the way his arms are shoved awkwardly up, half-underneath himself.

“Atsushi,” Dazai says in a sharp, breathy way. His freezing fingers pinch at Atsushi’s ankle, pulling the skin in a way that makes Atsushi yelp, his foot jackrabbiting into Dazai’s thigh. “Why so sad, Atsushi?” He pinches again, but this time Atsushi is expecting it and does nothing.

“I’m just trying to sleep, Dazai.” Atsushi says it as blandly as possible. “What do you want?”

Dazai’s knuckles rap against Atsushi’s ankle, but not with any force. “So mean to your mentor.” Atsushi can imagine the pout. He rolls his eyes. Then he stays quiet, and lets the question sit, because if he says anything else Dazai will just find a rabbit hole to take them down so Atsushi forgets he ever asked anything.

“I got you a drink, too,” Dazai says. “It’s up here.”

Atsushi shakes his head into the couch cushion. Absolutely not. His face is probably all red and puffy and tear-streaked, snot running from his nose, and he doesn’t need Dazai to see that lest he wither up in shame.

Dazai humphs. “Well,” he says, like he’s going to say more. Atsushi’s (Byakko’s) ears perk. Then he says nothing for a long while. In the renewed silence, Atsushi can imagine his face, the face he makes when he’s thinking hard about something, or trying to figure out how to hide something — blank, a little slack-jawed, glassy eyes trained on the wall, or a cobweb, or the sky. Then: “Well, maybe I just wanted to say goodnight. Is that so bad, Atsushi?”

It should be a teasing question. From Dazai, it should be completely rhetorical, accompanied with a lilting tone and a silly, sly smile. Instead, he says it softly, genuinely. As genuine as Dazai can be anyway. His hand is still on Atsushi’s ankle. It should be warm, by now, with this prolonged contact. Inexplicably, it’s still an ice cube against skin.

Atsushi wants to say: No, and please will you stay here? No, and thank you for this home and this company and for not putting a nail through my foot. No, and I know my standards are horrifically low, but you’re really the best guidance I’ve ever had. No, and please can we just stay right here on this couch forever? It’s okay if it’s only my ankle that ever gets physical touch again — just never let go, please?

Instead, he says: “Dazai, you’re drunk.”

“Hmph,” Dazai says, and then it’s like a static shock, the way the serenity of the night seems to blink out of the air. A startled laugh chokes out of Atsushi as Dazai ragdolls down, dropping his whole upper weight onto Atsushi’s, the top of his head knocking into Atsushi’s jaw. “Such a mean student!” Dazai reiterates, the hand that was on Atsushi’s ankle poking into Atsushi’s side repeatedly. The weight of him has Atsushi working a little harder to pull in breaths, but he finds he doesn’t mind.

Dazai is too heavy for Atsushi to get his arm out from under both of them and swat him away, but Atsushi certainly tries. “Stop it!” Atsushi shouts, but there’s still laughter bubbling up his throat. Byakko is as quiet as she can be, with Dazai so in contact, but he gets the sense she is not on board with Atsushi saying: “Get off me!” Rather, Byakko urges Atsushi to turn and tuck his head into Dazai’s shoulder. This would be mortifying, so Atsushi absolutely does not do that.

“Fine,” Dazai sighs overdramatically, then rolls, ragdolling once more onto the floor. Despite being unable to see him, Atsushi imagines the way he instantly pops back up and brushes off the front of his vest. “Well, Atsushi, I guess I’ll leave you to it! I’m taking my drink, though.”

Dazai hums as he gathers up his glass, a bottle, his shoes. Atsushi blinks into the couch cushion, considers the pleasant flush of joy that’s already receding, the coldness that’s spreading up from his ankles, down from his temples. Byakko is loud again.

“Good night,” Atsushi says. The door clicks. Sudden entrance, sudden exit. Typical Dazai, he grumbles internally.

The dorm is quiet again, except for Dazai’s voice back outside, slurring once more (part act, then). He’s singing a lullaby, loud and offkey. And then there’s Kunikida and Yosano, yelling. Very slowly, Atsushi peels himself off the couch, and goes to brush his teeth.

[erosauriarts]

Avatar x BSD

Warning: It’s canon related violence similar to in show BSD.

Atsushi - The Avatar

I thought it would be fitting since Byakko is implied to be reincarnating????? Also the Netflix preview got me excited.

AU Premise

**None of the canon characters from ATLA or LOK are gonna be referenced UNLESS it’s to justify bending rules.**

Republic City exists, but it’s less western base, bc I didn’t like that lmfaooo (Basically Yokohama but as it was in the 1930-50s). White people???? Huh?? Ig they exist now??? 😨

Lore Plot:

Red Lotus killed the last avatar because they wanted to find the new one, for some enlightenment reasons (IDK radicals man). The hunt for the new one wanted to take and raise the new avatar to push their own agenda. The man that did it, passed down his legacy to Fyodor (water), and he was the one to find Atsushi. Atsushi was around 5-8 and was from the northern water tribe. Atsushi’s parent was the moon’s spirits guardians (funny ha ha bc his’s design in literally Yin and Yang to Aku). Fyodor takes Atsushi, and isolates him with the other spiritual believers. They raise him, misinforming him greatly over what being the avatar actually means. Though he has a pretty good connection to his bending, Fyodor being his water bending master. They located somewhere in the north-pole.

In this time, everyone is looking for the avatar, but in like that way where you are like “here kitty kitty pspspsp.” And they even have a bounty for him. Bring him back alive ofc! In this, Dazai (Air) and Yosano (Water) are adopted siblings from a young age from Mori (Fire). Dazai at 18 splits off and becomes a traveling nomad, bc he fucking felt like it. Yosano was 14 when Fukuzawa (Air) saved her. Mori would make Yosano blood-bend, and so when she got free, she swore to never blood-bend again. She now uses her bending, and became one of the best healers.

The Armed Detective Agency works similar to canon in this, but has a specialized duty to find the avatar and turn them over to the white lotus. It’s extremely hard to get into the ADA, and forces benders to really push themselves. (In a way higher than the police force) Dazai joins, and is basically the ADA’s lost cat that goes away and comes back with something either helpful or cursed.

Dazai got leads on Fyodor bc Atsushi accidently used the avatar state when he found some new (and/or) prob figured out what happened to his family. Dazai basically yoinks Atsushi from the isolated village, running back on all fours with the weretiger dangling from his mouth /j. Dazai shows up, drops the avatar off, then bounces. Even though Fyodor’s spiritual training and water-bending was severely indepth, Atsushi lacked alot of common sense. Atsushi’s abuse in this is more intense psychological punishment more then the physical one in canon. He’s.. alittle messed up, but besides the point. Regardless how much bad stuff he went through, he was genuinely sweet. The stress of the truth tho, threw him off balance, so he is hesitant to go into the avatar state.

Atsushi’s bending teachers / relationship

Water: Fyodor. Strictly mentor and caregiver. He sucked at caring for Atsushi’s needs, and only was interested in talking when Atsushi asked about spirtual connection and Philosophical debates. Spent most of his childhood till Dazai yoinks him at 18

Earth: Kunikida. He sucked at it originally, but Atsushi was so determine, he ends up asking for help to connect. Atsushi warms up to him, looking up to him for strength.

Air: Dazai. The third one, and he’s stressed. Dazai runs circles around Atsushi, causing so much mental strain. Atsushi gets frustrated, and nearly gave up, but Dazai manages to get a mutual understanding.

Fire: Kyouka. Though younger, Kyouka was the fastest firebender. She constantly beat Atsushi when the Port Mafia sent her out. (He gets saved by the ADA a lot lol)

Character Mentions

Ranpo: A none bender. Works with the Republic City police force, but spends most of his time with the ADA. He actively helps them get around the police.

Akutugawa: Earth Bender. He can bend metal, and is actually really scary (..er?)

Chuuya: I go back and forth between earth and fire. And I think earth bc of his boom boom, smash kapow moments in canon. I thought fire cause hehe red.

Nikolai: Air. He’s that one guy that does flips and is nearly impossible to get a hold off. Boys a slinky. He’s Fyodor’s right hand man… they even… KISS?

[pixlezz]

HEAR ME OUT PLEASE

CHAPTER 113 BSD SPOILERS

disclaimer, i am not a theorist nor am i claiming this is right or shit. i’m just feeling silly 🫶

i’ve seen so many people be like because dazai isn’t in this image that he’s going back to the pm and tbh it makes sense that he’s the outsider as it seems like he is going to be built up as the one who mori chooses but we know that asagiri lovez plot twistz (he uses like the same 3 but it’s okay) so what if hear me out. atsushi will be the one chosen.

am i reaching?

yes. but i think it would be cool 😭

personally i’ve always wondered why mori would willing choose dazai. he is afraid of dazai, or at least was. he didn’t understand his mind. yes he offered for dazai to come back in the pm in season 2 but he also offered that to yosano. Inviting Dazai back to the pm would be a death sentence for mori since history would repeat itself and dazai would most likely kill mori like mori did to the previous pm boss.

now why do i think atsushi would be picked? directly, i don’t think he would. let’s say mori actively chooses dazai to join the pm again, don’t you think that atsushi would step in to save his mentor? to save dazai just as he saved him. this could also go for kyouka since atsushi saved her and pulled her into the light, he would do anything to fight for the family that he has gained in the detective agency. he cares for them and their well-being so much so that before he was even a member for long enough, he was willing to sacrifice himself and leave the detective agency just to protect the others so they wouldn’t be targeted by the port mafia. he would do anything to save them and would not want to see any of them in harms way.

so when push came to shove, i think that atsushi would be the one to volunteer in place of most likely dazai or kyouka if they were chosen and if atsushi wasn’t chosen first himself.

would it also be interesting for dazai to volunteer in his place? yes.

i just think it would be cool for the protagonist of the series to fall from the light that he was rescued by into the darkness that he’s been fighting. it’s something that has been explored in beast and considering atsushi’s morals at the start of the series were loose enough to be hesitant for stealing but not enough to completely dismiss it out leaves a question of how far would he go if they were tested. his moral compass is strong, but what if he became someone like oda. someone who didn’t need to kill in the port mafia, and who was still good at heart despite the side he was standing on. dazai would be able to see his former dead friend in the orphan he saved.

idk im just saying shit, i just think it would be cool 😭

[deluluzai]

Oh shit I completely forgot about the PM exchange thing.. anyway so here are my thoughts???!

Ok so first of all, we can be delulu yknow?? Everything will be resolved somehow and no one is going to the PM! Everyone is happy. I mean doesn't Asagiri always pull the least expected thing??

Second of all: no one is happy let's break it down member by member

Yosano: she ain't going.

Kenji: ok yknow what? I think the PM could benefit from his powers, and innocent personality! But aside from that, Kenji isn't really focused on, so the chance of this might be low, but still, reasonable.

Tanizaki: OKAY I saw someone else say this and I AGREE! Ofc it's the same thing with Kenji, it would be random asf for him to be the big sacrifice but! Tanizaki managed to trick the PM a few times with his ability! So this would make a lot of sense! I think the chance of this is higher honestly.

Kyouka: Ufff, guys idk... I mean she was in the PM not too long ago and she's focused on a good amount... This would make sense, knowing that Atsushi can't just steal her away anymore but... for a loooot of time, in the beginning of BSD, it was a whole back and forth thing with Kyouka getting to the PM, then escaping, then getting back, then escaping. So not only would the series fall back to that again, the PM might've just given up. Still, I feel like this has a 50/50 chance of happening, depending which way Asagiri wants to go.

Kunikida: As much as I don't want it happening, it might just happen.. I can't really say much about this one. Kunikida is smart, organised and loyal to the ADA and would die for them. But then again, he wouldn't stray away from his ideals and go off killing people and torturing them. I don't think this has a high chance of happening, I mean there's still a reasonable chance, but, it would be hard to work with him yk?

Atsushi: honestly, aint no way. I mean yes, the first major thing in the series was about the PM trying to catch Atsushi for money! But then again the relationship with the PM (mainly Aku) changed drastically for him! The guild isn't offering money to the PM for atsushi anymore, and Aku and Atsushi work together anyway! And mainly since he's the main character, I don't think he's going to have his POVs in the PM, since I think the ADA is going to get more focused on, and his relationship with Aku. NOT TO MENTION the fact that Dazai would DEFINITELY get him out of there bc??? His mentor?? Going down on the same path as him? Also as Aku? Killing people and basically becoming the person he promised Oda not to be anymore?? Aint no way.

Ranpo: Yeah... i could see it. But then again I don't. Because yeah it's reasonable for the PM to choose him, and since Ranpo is being focused on a lot currently, and it would really impact his story - Ranpo is then again a smart-ass brat who wouldn't even use his "ability" in the PM, especially since it's more helpful for detective work and not mafia work. So I have no clue about this one honestly, It would be interesting character arc but how would that like... work?

And lastly..

Dazai: Ah god, I wrote him last bc I don't know what to say! I mean most people I've seen guessed it was him going. And honestly? Fucking reasonable! Like why WOULDNT Mori pick Dazai? Like yeaaah he's scared of him, but throughout the series he asked Dazai a lot of times if he would come back! It would make a lot of sense! Especially since Dazai became older and wiser. Honestly the only big thing that's holding be back from actually betting on Dazai is that... would asagiri really put him back there? Right now? I mean, look, guy was in jail this entire time, barely goes back to the agency and boom, back to the PM. I think Dazai is going to be again crucial for this new arc, especially in Atsushi's character! I think, writing wise, Dazai shouldn't go back. But then again it's the most logical thing! I have so many thoughts about this.

Or then again Asagiri could just pull the most craziest shit that none of us were expecting so-

[starlightshadowsworld]

Tw attempted self harm and child abuse.

No one really grasped how bad Atsushi's childhood was for a long time.

They could make deductions based on how he acted and recalling how they met.

Atsushi seemed rather tightlipped about the whole thing. Dropping an occasional clue but no one pried.

They all had pasts they'd rather not talk about.

It wasn't until one day when Atsushi had messed up on an important mission.

Kunikida was scolding him for it and fixing the bookcase that had been damaged.

Dazai was supposed to be fixing it but well it's Dazai so Kunikida was just multitasking.

Atsushi looking down in shame and embarrassment. And than Kunikida, finishing his lecture hands Atsushi the hammer to finish the shelf off.

And Atsushi freezes.

His mind goes blank. All Atsushi knows is that he's in trouble, has been waiting for the other shoe to drop. Waiting for the Agency to realise how worthless he is.

And now there's a hammer in his hand.

"Well, go on we don't have all day." Says Kunikida, impatiently.

Atsushi really doesn't want to do this. He couldn't do it when he was 11 and he knows he can't do it now. Tears are in his eyes but he won't dare let them fall.

He won't run from this.

Kunikida and the rest of the Agency have been so kind to him. They've done so much, put up with all the messes that have happened because of him.

If this is what they want, than it's what Atsushi deserves.

So he sinks to the floor, takes off his shoe and holds the nail in shaking hands.

He brings the hammer down only for someone to grab his arm. Atsushi looks up and sees Kunikida looking at him in horror.

And it's not just him.

Dazai, who was on the other end of the office is now before Atsushi.

He takes the hammer and nail out of his hands, staring them down like they've personally offended him. And dumping them in the tool box in the corner.

"Atsushi, are you alright?" Asks Kunikida, concerned. Atsushi's confused. This wasn't how he expected this to go at all.

Why was no one yelling at him?

Why was there no burning pain in his foot?

Maybe Kunikida wanted to punish him himself, but than why let Dazai take the tools away?

"Why did you stop me?" Is what Atsushi says instead. The concern only growing on both his mentors faces. "You were going to hurt yourself." Says Kunikida and Atsushi laughs, it's panicked and startled.

"Yeah? So? I messed up."

Kunikida frowns "have you done this before, when you've 'messed up'?" Atsushi doesn't really get the air quotes but nods.

"I found some sweets, I mean I stole the sweets. And the Headmaster told me to nail my foot to the floor. But I couldn't do it so he did it."

Horror and understanding fills Kunikida's eyes. Dazai is standing nearby, an unreadable expression on his face.

"So when I told you off and gave you the hammer, you thought...." He trails off, shaking his head.

"Atsushi, while you did make a mistake it was just that a mistake. We all make them, some more than others. And no matter how bad or how little, you will never be hurt for it."

Atsushi frowns, confused "you won't?" Dazai nods, sitting beside them. "Never, you will never be hurt by us." He looks at Atsushi directly. "If Kyouka messed up on a mission, would you want us to hurt her?"

He shakes his head, horrified and Dazai smiles. "Exactly, and that applies to you." Kunikida nods "I will tell you off and than we will dicuss where to go next. That is all, I will never raise a hand against you."

Tears fill Atsushi's eyes, he'd expected cruelty and was met with nothing but kindness. "Come here" Says Kunikida, opening his arms and Atsushi practically dives into them.

Dazai chuckles, running a hand through his hair. "I don't deserve this" whispers Atsushi but they both hesr him. "I'm afraid, that's not for you to decide." Says Dazai, gently. "You've been outvoted" agrees Kunikida.

And for once Atsushi decides to listen to them and just enjoys the feeling of being held.

He doesn't notice Dazai and Kunikida exchange looks. That they are going to find whoever did this to Atsushi, and make them pay.

Atsushi didn't realise it, but he was family. And no one hurt their family and got away with it.

[mytragedyperson]

ok don't think he'll die, stay dead, whatever, but the angst that comes from Dazai dying or them believing Dazai is dead? so there's a big battle, somehow they stop the vampirism, maybe they all team up to get the sword out of Bram, whatever. Either way the vampirism is cured and, somehow, the Decay of Angels have been defeated. And then, just when they think it's over, just when they think they've won, Fyodor manages to send them a message that Dazai is dead. By this point Chuuya has been cured but Fyodor doesn't really unddrstand their bond and assumes he'll be fine you know, they hate each other anyway, right? Chuuya would probably be happy the person using him is dead. Instead, a part of Chuuya breaks. First of all, he can never use Corruption again. Second of all, one of the first people to actually see him as a human is dead, he killed him. Honestly, i imagine Chuuya would spiral a little after this, start to wonder if Dazai was wrong, if he truly was just a monster. He did kill his own partner, how could he not be a monster after that? Eventually, someone manages to drive home the whole this isn't your fault you were under someone's control thing, but by this point Chuuuya is so sick of losing and giving up control of his body. Also, i do think Arahabaki would be pissed as well, because someone who was, in his own way, caring for his vessel is now gone and now he can't come out because it's simply not safe for his vessel.

Sigma starts to feel like a failure, like he let him down. He already doesn't have much self-esteem or self-worth but this just makes it worse.

The ADA loses one of their members, possibly for the first time? like i don't think they've dealt with a member dying but i could be wrong and probably am. Kunikida loses his partner, Atsushi loses his mentor and father/older brother figure, Ranpo loses someone who understood him and his intelligence, and Kyouka loses the person who helped her join the ADA. He doesn't take as much of a mentorship role with her as he did Atsushi and Akutagawa, but he did encourage her to destroy the Moby Dick which got her in the ADA and made her believe her past didn't have to define whether she could be good and live in the light. Honestly i need more of that shit, them bonding over being in both worlds and Dazai basically being like hey if they accept me with all the crimes i committed they'll accept you too. On a similar note, Autagawa finding out Dazai is dead, his mentor, the person he looks up to the most, the one who took him in, gave him a home in the port mafia. I'm not saying he was necessarily a good mentor to Akutagawa, I also don't think he's the worst, did he really do anything that any other Mafia leader wouldn't do if you went against his orders? I wouldn't say so. but i do think he'd be heartbroken, just as much as Atsushi if not more so. Ango being the first to know he's dead even before Fyodor tells anyone. Also this isn't related, but i wonder if Dazai managed to send some sort of message to Ango before he was shot or whatever? maybe whatever crazy contingency plan he has? i feel like that would make sense

[hopefull-mindset]

I’m incredibly exhausted from writing 8k+ words about abuse in BSD and still not done with it. I just would like BSD tumblr to know the absolute monster this is going to look like, which I’m probably going to post tomorrow. I’m going to finish today but tomorrow I can go over and re-edit some stuff without falling on my ass writing Kyouka’s section

The structure so far, in order is:

What is Abuse

Portrait of a father

The Port Mafia’s Environment

The Heartless Cur

RE: Portrait of a father (<- this is Beast Atsushi’s section)

The Man Who Raised Dazai

A Mother’s Love

I started writing this because I was getting frustrated with the restrictive discussion about the topic of abuse in this community, and the way the “Abuse Cycle” is discussed is quite shallow. The concept in general is very flawed to me, even if I understand the idea behind it.

The progression between Mori -> Dazai -> Akutagawa -> Kyouka has so little similarity besides two things in common.

First one is their talent for cruelty lurking inside them, and second seeing themselves in each other and having them join the mafia because of it. On this stance the abuse cycle is not the wrong term, you guys just have no idea what you’re taking about when it is discussed.

The “abuse cycle” is what keeps you in that negative state and not feeling like you have anywhere else to go except this awful environment that doesn’t keep you safe. That’s what makes it the abuse cycle and we should feel proud Kyouka left, but you guys talk about it as if it’s the actions towards the next victim that makes it the abuse cycle when I’ve just said none of their actions has barely (if any) similarities. Higuchi is part of the abuse cycle, Q and Kouyou is too. The mafia is the embodiment of this cycle.

You guys are also grossly overestimating how much Mori actually did to Dazai. As I said, action is not what makes it the abuse cycle. It’s not the same thing as Yosano in this area at all. Dazai’s mental state was definitely harmed by continuing to be in the Mafia, he was still just a child, and what Mori did was not right in the slightest, but none of what Dazai is like is actually Mori’s fault. It’s a tough answer and I will go over it in my post. if you think Dazai was abused under the qualifications that he was a child who was in an abusive, violent environment, the you also have to think about Chuuya and Beast Atsushi.

My answer to that is no, they were not abused by the Port Mafia and their childhood’s were already stripped away and we don’t have enough information to say they were abused there, but they were already abuse victims that were already conditioned enough for the mafia not having to do anything. The mentoring situations in the mafia don’t see abuse as abuse, just another way of teaching their subordinates.

Akutagawa would be the same… if I wasn’t for the fact Dazai’s actions were targeted to forcefully beat an intention into him that wasn’t already a product of the slums. It needs to be targeted at something in you to be abuse. Not to say you guys aren’t also overestimating how much of Dazai’s abuse made him who he was, a lot of it was just the slums, but I digress. I don’t need to explain everything I’ve already wrote down.

The only people I can confidently say were abuse victims of the port mafia are Kouyou, Kyouka, and Q. That’s quite literally it. We don’t know what happened to Dazai, Chuuya had N and his time as a sheep member, Atsushi had the Director, and Akutagawa had Dazai (does not count as the port mafia itself). Those three are the only ones I can trace back to the Port Mafia as their tormentor.

Why am I not saying Akutagawa is her abuser? Well we have nothing to confirm that, she was not trained by Akutagawa (that was Verlaine), and we have no specifics on their relationship besides him being the own to bring her into the port mafia because he was sent to. Sure he was the one behind the phone in that one mission, but he’s not the only who has access to it, Kouyou did too. If you really want to put into context her abuse at the hands of the port mafia, think of her as nothing more than a tool for them to pass around. There was nothing more to their relationship than what I’ve already said, I’ve checked numerous times in the manga.

As shown in Beast, she doesn’t need Akutagawa there for her to run away and she doesn’t need him there to be broken by the mafia. Anyway, that’s all I have to say rn. I’ll hold off other thoughts until that ultimate post, just know I’m not happy with most of you. Especially those who criticize the way Asagiri writes abuse, I think you guys are just unnerved by how actually realistic it is.

Thank you for the attention my Mori post got, I thought I’d get yelled at for it considering most of you can’t fathom he’s a character with thought behind him. Gods you act the same way with the director as well. I wouldn’t have normally done this, but I needed a break from the main post. I’m fearing it’s going to become a 10k word essay. I do say more there, don’t worry if I glossed over anything here.

[popopretty]

Hi, how is your day? I want to ask you about Dazai's character and its developments in the series, and what do you think of him? Do you think he's smarter than fyodor? Thank you for the answer in advance... And in the end, I would like to thank you for your hard work and your wonderful style of writing. it is relly special ..

Hi, thanks for the message. I am glad u like what I do (I don’t really “write”, just “translate”, though).

I’m quite bad at expressing my opinions. I normally do not give much thought to things until I am asked about it. So u may find it my answer all over the place because I haven’t had it arranged in my head, it’s more like pulling out old notes from a rusty drawer. So I’m sorry about it in advanced. And this is all my personal opinion, so you don’t have to agree with me.

Dazai is a complicated and interesting character for me. He is smart, too smart that it brings him misery. People say ignorance is bliss, right? Then Dazai must be the most unfortunate guy on earth. Even Asagiri once described him as someone who has lived for 2000 years. I, with the brain of a normal person, can’t bring myself to imagine how boring life would be for him, knowing things too well. Some might say that he was being overdramatic when he was young, and that he’d regret having all those thoughts when he gets older. But I personally don’t think so. I think the pain and agony he felt was real, then or now. Just that in the past, he hadn’t met people who would surprise him, or go beyond his calculations, he lived on thinking humans were ugly, sinful and stupid and didn’t understand why they should be saved. His head must have been overwhelmed with thoughts that no one would ever be able to understand, and no one would even try to understand. That is why he was always lonely, and suicidal. I don’t think he really wanted to die, he just couldn’t find what to live for.

The thing I like about Dazai’s character is that he fundamentally didn’t change, even with all the so-called character developments. He was still the smart, and sad and lonely guy that he used to be. But he have met people who made him want to try living, peope who gave him a purpose and people who genuinely cared about him. And those are things that even his genius brain couldn’t have predicted. From a fifteen year old who believed nothing was worth living for, he has become able to tell Kyouka that everyone deserves a second chance in life, to Fyodor that it is okay even if we are all sinfully stupid, and admit that no matter how well him and Fyodor can foresee things, the fate of the world is not decided by them, but the imperfect human beings that are fighting for what they deem precious out there. I doubt Dazai will ever get rid of his suicidal thoughts, or loneliness, but at least he has things he wants to protect, and it gives him the motivation to live on. We haven’t seen him talking about dying for no reasons for so long. Now he only lets himself get hurt, or take risky action for the greater sake (BEAST is not counted cuz that is a totally different universe), and I think it is a good sign in his character development.

I forgot to write about his relationship with Akutagawa and Atsushi. Basically, I don’t think Dazai was a good mentor. Someone who hardly experienced failure is not likely to become a good mentor. He treated Akutagawa badly in the past because all he could see was that the weak could not survive in the harsh world and there was no saving for them. But the meeting with Oda has changed his way of thinking. He now sees orphans and the weak as those he has to protect, that’s why the way he treated Atsushi is very different from that of Akutagawa. He is still not the best mentor, but he is better now.

About Fyodor, I don’t think he is smarter than Fyodor. They must be on the same level of wits. Dazai actually can act more human when he is around people like him, so having Fyodor as an opponent can actually be very entertaining to him. Even if Dazai is going to win the final battle, I don’t think it is because Dazai is smarter. He is just backed up by more people in the “somewhat beautiful” side.