#and countless other places
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#there is no such thing as an ending#just a place where you leave the story#death is but the next great adventure#thanks for all those stories dame Maggie Smith#from the halls of Hogwarts#to the grand rooms of Downton#with a stop at the great exotic marigold hotel#and countless other places#you were grand
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I truly think that one of the biggest tragedies in BEAST in regards to the Akutagawa siblings is that, at the core of it, Ryuunosuke viewed himself as a beast, and showed his love in a way a beast would, while Gin was the only person who ever saw him as human and judged him accordingly. She did not see a beast acting like a beast, the way everybody else did, she saw a human acting like a beast and it’s part of what drove her away.
The ADA saw their rookie detective at his worst, and watched—and continues to watch—him grow from a beast to a human over time. Consumed by hatred and only knowing how to be cruel, and slowly learning how to become human.
Gin saw her brother at his best—the best he could be in their situation—and then watched him grow from a boy to a beast within moments. The scraps of humanity that he had, all disappearing into rage so primal it no longer made him seem human.
#I was unhappy when Gin called her brother a monster in that scene after all his efforts to find her again#because I was treating her like Canon! Gin and not by the different experiences they’ve lived#i always thought that saying that to him was cruel when she’s known him since they were in the slums#but the thing is. He did act like a monster. by human standards he was a monster to others#he mutilated and butchered people even as a child. even if it was done out of love#he had no regards to holding back his brutality and maimed people. even if we understand its cause of how he grew up#he slaughtered countless of mafiosos—perhaps even subordinates under Gin. people who were simply there at the wrong place at the wrong time#I think the dislike of BEAST Gin has greatly to do about perspective#she is not like Dazai or the reader who knows the circumstances or his mind#she is not like the ADA who saw Akutagawa at his worst#and lastly she is not like Atsushi who can understand her brother like he’s her other half. he’s not#akutagawa is effectively a stranger she used to know. someone she is familiar with and has tender feelings for#but not someone that she /knows/. he is not someone that she /understands/.#bungou stray dogs#bsd#bsd akutagawa#ryuunosuke akutagawa#akutagawa ryunosuke#bsd gin#akutagawa gin#gin akutagawa#bungo stray dogs beast#beast#beast akutagawa#beast gin#bsd beast
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aptx!kaito au in which Shinichi doesn't know aptx exists and feels insane that his leading theory is "a six year old is the mastermind behind Kaitou Kid"
#no I don't know how this would logically work I just thought it'd be funny#and yes this would fuck up countless meetings and character arcs but consider: the CHAOS#this au is a gift to me from me bc ch1120 is making me pop a vein and I needed a pick-me-up <3#Shinichi humbling arc but it's because he keeps getting outsmarted by (what he thinks is) a literal 6 yo#(given that he never ran into the org and doesn't know shrinking is possible plus Kaito is much better at acting like a normal child)#and KID gets to bully Shinichi. as a treat#pls don't look at the drawing too closely ajdhhdhd tis just a dood in this cheap little notebook I got as a handout#somehow I find it easier to draw in places other than my sketchbook... less pressure to do it well and fill up all the blank space I guess#kuroba kaito#kaitou kid#kid the phantom thief#kudou shinichi#jimmy kudo#does anyone even call him that anymore it's so cursed. JIMMY#dcmk#detective conan#magic kaito#detco#idk what to call this au...#kinda want it to have something to do w the 'the truly impossible' sherlock quote hmmm#redefining the improbable AU#maybe?#shrunken!kaito#aptx!kaito
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I've said it before, I'll say it again, and I'm sure it won't be the last time. I AM SICK AND BLOODY TIRED OF THESE MFS, HALF OF WHO DONT EVEN CARE ABOUT CURSED CHILD, BITCHING AND MOANING ABOUT AN ANGSTY TEEN DARING TO BE AN ANGSTY TEEN, I WILL FIGHT THE LOT OF YOU
(this is gonna be a bit long and probably incoherent so sit down and fucking listen to me 🔫 stick with me because I'm not just complaining about albus haters)
eVERYBODY wants cOoMmpllEeXx relatable HUMAN characters - and then SHIT themselves when the flaws a CHILD has isn't just 🥺 uwu im socially awkward and traumatised 🥺. that's why scorpius doesn't get this fuckass treatment, because his terrible human flaw is that he's a bit shit at conversation and gets sad about his dead mum (generalised understatement, but this post isnt about him. dont come for me i love him 🫶🏻)
god forbid albus, who feels unloved and unwanted (with valid evidence for a teenager), albus who feels completely out of place and outcast from his entire famously-close-knit family, ablus who is well known by the world by default via Harry and hates the attention and high expectations, albus who then gets targeted and bullied by his peers because he's not as perfect and brilliant as his father, albus who is then isolated from his one friend because Harry is making irrational ptsd fueled decisions, albus who tells Harry completely sincerely that he knows he's unlikeable but he'll try and change himself and be more like his siblings because he genuinely believes that's what Harry and everyone else whos had the misfortune of meeting him wants, albus who spends the entire play trying to prove himself and fix things via idiotic childish decisions BECAUSE HES A WHOLE UNSTABLE CHILD
god forbid that CHILD doesn't react like a patient, supported, well adjusted, level headed adult. god forbid he reacts outwardly. god forbid he reacts at all, my bad. clearly he should just sniffle a bit as if he doesn't feel suffocated and helpless by everything in his life, because obviously hes just a spoiled brat who doesn't know what real suffering is. god forbid he complains or feels anything negatively, or doesn't quite grasp that other people are struggling too because he is too busy trying so hard to deal with himself and his declining mental health the best he can with basically no support or understanding. god forbid he isn't completely perfect.
you all sound like some fucking boomer telling teenagers they don't know what real struggling is, they aren't mentally ill, they dont have any problems because they have a roof over their head, they should all go to war kids are too soft these days 😫😖😱 fUCKING‼️SHUT UP‼️
he does things wrong but he knows he does and he does everything he can to fix it! and he is fourteen!!! do none of you remember what being fourteen is like 😭😭 I swear half of you have got to be basically fourteen yourselves cmon man
cause I'm seeing this fucking pattern a lot recently. not just for albus, not just in this fandom, everywhere. ‼️ no one can fucking handle flawed characters anymore ‼️ the only thing any character is allowed to have wrong with them is trauma apparently, otherwise they have to be perfect, and I'm getting sick of it. characters and stories are meant to reflect real life, they're meant to help shape our world view, why are you expecting everyone to be fucking perfect??? what happened to nuance? what happened to understanding character development? you are all acting like characters and people are so black and white. either they're perfect or they're insufferable and evil. I won't lie, the most common victims i've noticed of this are women. but the flawed women are typically demonised, whereas the men are typically turned into uwu baby boys who actually aren't capable of doing anything wrong and then fanon goes nuts making them into ittle wittle victims. and I'm so fucking sick of all of it, I hate this. (obviously this is not a strict rule. Albus Potter, and also Albus Dumbledore now I mention it, are demonised beyond belief)
BRING BACK FLAWS AND BRING BACK NOT COMPLETELY WRITING OFF A CHARACTER BECAUSE THEY DARE TO BE HUMAN
I AM FED UP, ALBUS POTTER GET BEHIND ME
#he did many things wrong BUT I PROMISE YOU HE IS MORE AWARE THAN YOU ARE#HE HATES HIMSELF MORE THAN YOU EVER COULD#this post has been building a lot because i just kEEP SEEING ALBUS HATERS AND ITS DRIVING ME INSANE#i am albus potters defence lawyer actually#also eloise bridgertons i am seeing far too many people jumping on that hate train#i know shes going through her im not like other girls i hate pink phase but OF COURSE SHE IS#SHE LIVES IN THE 1800S WOMEN ARENT ALLOWED TO DO SHIT SHE FEELS TRAPPED IN A BOX AND ALL SHE SEES IS OTHER PEOPLE PLAYING THEIR PARTS#i could talk about her a lot more but this isnt the time or place 😔✋🏻 eloise bridgerton they could never make me hate you#also sansa stark i havent even watched game of thrones but i would fight to the death to defend her#her only crime was being a naive child and yet people hate her mercilessly#these are the people coming to me off the top of my head but there are countless fucking others#we are witnessing the death of media literacy and the death of nuance and its killing me i cannot fucking do this#i sincerely hope anyone complaining about al dont ever have teenage children because they will be shit at supporting or understanding them#hpcc#harry potter#albus potter#scorpius malfoy#years spent on tumblr and i still dont know how to tag#albus severus potter#harry potter and the cursed child#scorbus#is it cheeky if i tag bridgerton or game of thrones?#it feels cheeky 😔#the marauders#tagging that too because that fandom are fucking perpetrators of this#(said as someone in it dont come for me)
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In the back of my mind I will always imagine Siffrin sometimes just tilting their head back, groaning about how far a tear is, and then just slicing their neck open. LIKE THE PARTY IS RIGHT THERE, WHAT THE FUCK DO THEY THINK IS GOING IN WITH THAT??
#Isat#Isat Siffrin#cw sui mention#Listen I like to think sometimes Siffrin acts like how Players act and that gets REAL FUNNY REAL FAST#Just the put upon attitude of how much time something's taking or taking a wrong turn or something#Tapping your foot like. Cooommmeeee ooooonnn hurry up!! We got places to be!!!#Except he tries real hard to not let the others see that but. Siffrin isn't a great liar 😭#Fellas made them countless times flabbergasted by his choices in the house#This is more au than real btw I just think it's funny personally
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i can’t explain why but this makes me ill
#like i feel a legit knot in my stomach#tbh i’m not like the biggest beatles fan anymore but#it’s crazy to me how the band that did so much to open the cultural and musical worlds to people#and who used their status at the top of the world to genuinely push music forward and inspired countless acts#will be dethroned by someone who [while i won’t say is untalented but i personally struggle to find the good lyricist singer dancer or#performer or musican in] by all accounts is just a business tbh#like there’s nothing for music its all for charts accolades and money and that’s horrifying to think that someone can get this far with that#being the biggest goal.#that’s like sending 2010 mick jagger into the 60s and getting him to make the rolling stones popular#like businessman ≠ artist#you have to have an actual talent or reason for popularity to become popular and i see none of that#there’s no progression for anyone but her: the beatles pushed music stones pushed culture michael jackson pushed desegregation of popular#music#and she has…. ?#just looking for something she’s truly accomplished other than beating records because that’s all it seems to be#and she has no humanitarian reason for fame either#elton john was a huge star and remained a huge star not due to his musical output or breaking records but because he’s dedicated so much#time and money to causes greater than himself#he didn’t need to beat the beatles to carve his own place out in history#no one should have to beat them to that#their impact should be felt in ways that make it hard to think of a culture without them#because as it stands she’ll be seen as the chick that beat the beatles#never once used as a marker herself#it will still be them because they will remain important to culture and music#just as they would be without setting records#hell look at bob dylan#he has like 0 chart records and was given a nobel prize and will continue to be the marker for lyrical excellence#it just makes me so mad that the person who will beat all these records is doing it just to beat records tbh#it’s not deserved or even slightly important#it’s just a record to beat which SUCKS anyways i talked too long but im mad so :/
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I know this is a porn blog and all but it's so hard to like. explain to people what Dave Mirra meant to the BMX community
#unimportant thoughts#like...I can't even begin to explain it#like I'm not even a big fan of Mirra's riding#but what he meant to the sport is such large footsteps#the stardom the ads the videogames the contests the videos#the things he did FOR the community - the way he gave BACK#in tangible ways we saw and understood and reference today#no can fill his place#and it honestly really sickening to me the way a lot of modern olympic park riders act compared to him#they whine and whine and whine about not getting enough respect and support while hiding in private training facilities#only ever posting clips of them training in foam pits and on resi and talk about things to come and how well they did in the last olympic#qualifier event#mirra did so much#Mirraco...his own bicycle company he used to sponsor his fellow riders AND up an coming riders he thought deserved a chance#Drop The Hammer...a entire video dedicated to giving the spotlight to other riders he thought deserved the props and hype#on top of the Nike ads....on top of the X Games gold medals...on top of the videogames...#Animalhouse Jam.....and countless other things that I don't even know because it was before my time#and now the riders twenty years after him complain that the community doesnt do enough to support THEM??#it's...a community#it's all about community.#sigh.#delete later#anyways. RIP Dave Mirra.#whatever demons he fought and lost are demons I never want to meet.#okay short nerd rant over
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Tag drop: Seele (Honkai: Star Rail). Listen, I used to write her and I miss her a bit, and also: there's Belobog people around. And also, well, she's much more interesting than people give her credit for. Also, prepare for some 'rewriting', because Belobog's pacing in specific ways kind of blew a little bit much.
#seele. [ we tell them “things will be better tomorrow.” everyone knows it's a lie; but it gets them to sleep with some hope. ]#seele: ic. [ he always says “humanity's endless conflicts”; but you don't get peace by offering everything up on a silver platter. ]#seele: inquiries. [ that's not the only thing you won't have heard of down here; princess. ]#seele: countenance. [ to all those thugs and gangsters in the underworld; i'm like a spectre always haunting them. ]#seele: introspection. [ the chief's right. sometimes a sharp blade is the only way to get people to come to their senses. ]#seele: meta. [ she got used to people losing their homes. and she got used to people losing their lives. but crying alone was useless. ]#seele: little notes. [ they only eat half their meal; throw the rest away. do they know people below haven't got enough food to eat? ]#seele: wishes. [ where there's hope: there's the will to fight. ]#seele: etc. [ a young girl smiles subtly. “how? right here; right now; i am alone… but it feels... very lively.” ]#seele: underworld. [ what's more important than miracles; seele. is to protect people's hopes for miracles. ]#seele: overworld. [ oleg saw how a look of gloom passed over her tender face. “let's go back. i don't want to come back here again.” ]#seele: sampo. [ wildfire has countless issues on its place right now. we don't need a side order of koski. ]#seele: sampo. [ so we're there; now it's real. now that you have me; do you want me still? ] inominati.#seele: bronya. [ they go their separate ways: one stepping into the light; and the other into the shadows. until one day; they meet again.#seele: natasha. [ i learned quickly that tantrums won't get you anywhere. she knows how to give you a taste of your own medicine. ]#seele: oleg. [ i probably owe my life to the chief. ]#seele: hook. [ don't let her appetite for chaos fool you; i think that kid's going places. ]#seele: v. youth. [ everyone in the dark side of town knew that fearless homeless girl. everyone wanted to avoid that wild; stubborn rascal.#seele: v. underworld. [ just what we all need: more lies about a world that never was and never will be. ]#seele: v. present. [ can you imagine the consequences if we told the people what happened here? they'd be devastated. ]#seele: v. future. [ ... priorities? what do you mean? are you saying rebuilding the underworld isn't one of your “priorities”? ]
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No but I genuinely can't stop thinking about how white fans Only think about Aisha when they see posts about racism and whitewashing. Like they literally never think about her any other time.
She's literally one of the main winx, is always part of major plot lines, and has major character development throughout all of the seasons but especially the early ones. It's just so fucking ironic how white fans will make One Post A Year calling out rainbow for whitewashing and then literally never think about Aisha till their next Yearly Performative Post.
It's just,, like how do they not see the irony in that? How do they not see the racist irony in associating the One Black Character with Just Racism. There is So Much to talk about how with Aisha that isn't Just Racism. Y'all will go on and on about Bloom's escapism and survivor's guilt but won't ever think about Aisha's self-sacrificial idealogy or loneliness. Or Stella's neglect issues but not Aisha having the same problem? Tecna's Big Sacrifice but never Aisha's multiple sacrifices? OR if it's not straight up ignoring her, it's only ever talking about the Bad Shit she goes through instead of the many moments where she's happy. White fans literally only associate her with black misery and anti-black racism. Do you not see how fucked up that is?
#there's a time and place for discussions of racism#there's a time and place for discussing how racist rainbow has been to aisha and the other characters of color#but if you ONLY think about aisha when those discussions come up?#if you literally never appreciate her or talk about her any other time of the day?#if you out right ignore her in favor of the white characters?#like...#the call is coming from inside the house#fandom racism#im positive there's a post out there that explains this issue in better detail#but this literally Always happens to characters of color and especially black characters#make one post about whitewashing and then rb countless whitewashed posts#make one post saying the fandom should appreciate aisha more and then never post about her or rb her posts#like? dude??#Again. You Are The Problem.#its not even being part of the problem you just Are the problem
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I have Winter's most recent playlist for Zhongli playing in the background. And it just got to 11:45 and there is the most beautiful rendition of 'Fairytale' I've ever heard in my life, and while it comes from a vastly different piece of media, it somehow simply fits perfectly. It just reiterates how I think I'm incapable of loving anything as much as I love Liyue. I can't stop trying to grasp at words that describe how my chest warms whenever I hear these lines of his, even if most of them break my heart at the exact same time.
#[ honestly; especially when havria is mentioned-- perhaps it's because we know almost all of the details (zl-- i just?) ]#[ ... surrounding her death. but it just puts the archon war in such a specific perspective that hits harder than anything. ]#[ it tells me just how gruesome it was. he says it himself; /he does/. he says that it was cruel. it was ever so cruel. ]#[ and i think about how he says that and i get lost in it for 4+ hours. ]#[ because i think about how all havria wanted was a peaceful haven for her people. all she wanted was for them to /live/. ]#[ and be safe. and that reminds me of /my/ muse. and how that's what she wanted as well. for her people to be safe. ]#[ it was one of the reasons she ruled with morax; because she knew he could offer that. and then all these other reasons came along too. ]#[ and then i look at liyue and i hear ping in my head 'it seems she was right after all'. she was right to put her faith in morax. ]#[ because he did everything that she knew he could do. protect /them/ and offer them a place to live. ]#[ and he gave them that. along with the adepti. he lived up to everything. ]#[ ooc. ] wherever her spirit may be among the countless grains of sand and specks of dust between the harbor and the mountains…
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and when i realize all my original stories are just about the same thing over and over and over again as though i’m sitting in front of a white board of crazy
#caroline talks#when i move into my new place#i think i’m gonna get a white board and a cork board#not for school but for writing#and then i’ll get another cork board/white board for school#but. sitting here feeling normal#when actually this is all a love story#oldest story in the universe and it’s just.#when you love someone but the timing isn’t right or when it’s been dead from the start#what do you do when you know something is dead in the water when it begins#but you decide to pursue it anyways bc isn’t love all about#giving something a chance even though you don’t know if it’ll survive#I mean. American weddings have all the oaths about until death do us part or whatever#right when you’re saying the vows you’re reminded that if anything death will eventually get in the way#and it’s like!!! ‘hello. one day you will lose each other. but do you want to proceed anyways?’#and so many people say ‘yes’ to that and maybe i am sometimes skeptical of marriage but that part makes me scream#or like. even taking marriage out of it#you look at countless people who fell in love despite the circumstances like war or famine or just simply the pains of growing up#and it’s like!! it was inevitable!!!#and I don’t even mean romantic love necessarily either!#platonic love!!! what does it mean to create. companion even though#we will all die or maybe just separate#we have countless friend breakups#and yet we keep entering into friendships going ‘you might one day be a stranger to me. but for now i’m going to pursue this’#AND!!! YOU KNOW!!! YOU KNOW!!!#‘this relationship already is a ghost but we will love it and nurture it anyways’ AND!!
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oh my god when i played through sonic adventure for the first time, i was ready for big's story to be sooo difficult because of how much hate and anger ive seen towards it. when i actually played it though it was literally so easy, i could not believe how easy it was. people really just need to get good oh my god im so tired of ppl blaming the game (and big, by extension) for their difficulties with a fishing minigame of all things
people act like bigs story in sonic adventure is the worst thing to ever happen in a sonic game and it's so hard and the gameplay is so bad but when i played it i thought it was fine and i beat it in like. an hour. one of the easiest parts of the whole game. i am convinced that a lot of people who hate games like sonic adventure sonic unleashed etc are just bad at video games and blame that on the game itself and the characters in it
#asks#not liking the gameplay is fine but i dont understand why people take it out on big himself hes just sitting there#i honestly cant help but wonder if the hatred for big comes from a place of fatphobia#and im not saying that if you dont like big then you must hate fat people#but isnt it kinda strange how theres also a lot of people who dislike the treasure hunting stages in the sonic adventure games#but ive never seen a single person hate knuckles or rouge over it and theyre actually pretty widely liked characters#but theres So many people who hate big over his gameplay in ONE game even though hes had countless other appearances that arent like that#and ive also seen a lot of mean spirited jokes about bigs weight#hmm pretty suspicious
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<3
#half life#half life gman#doodle#this is a redraw of that one HLA trailer screenshot#where he looks directly at you with both eyes rather than his typical lazy right eye#G only needs one eye to perceive what is directly around him in my interpretation#the reason his other eye wanders so much is because he is in fact in countless places at once#and this other eye gazing out into the universe is this body’s connection to what every other aspect perceives#if both of his eyes lock with yours he is temporarily diverting his attention to you completely#where you see two eyes looking at you there are in fact millions#from across the multiverse#if he looks at you this way#he is willing to reveal you are significant to him somehow
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also in regards to the m9 series i am begging for caleb to get a better ending than he did in the og campaign
#for the record i am NOT TALKING ABOUT SHADOWGAST#i am talking about him joining the system that abused him and countless other children#because he thinks he can fix the system by turning it into wizard cops#im all for caleb becoming a professor at the academy but for the love of god destroy the volstrucker and kill ikithon#i think they should actually let astrid kill ikithon this time instead of doing the bullshit ‘if we kill him we’re no better than he is 😔’#cr#<- starting to remember why i left cr in the first place
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I go through these short periods of time feeling very okay and good even only bc i distract myself from what pains me until it catches up again and the cycle repeats itself
#i think it's verrrrrrrrry close to catching up again after i've had normal 2 weeks lol#so many ifs and buts and would things be better had i made a different decision lived in a different place or time etc#but i'll never now i'll always only have the here and now and the unchangeable past#and the very incertain scary future i'm trying so so so hard to be hopeful about but seeing things as they are right now. i really dont kno#i can only fake it to some point. i cant fake it till i make it. i'll fall apart countless times and then wont make it anyway#i feel like. i feel like all the circumstances i've been in have all always been against me#like i'm the only unlucky one among the people i know#i try so so so hard to remind myself that people who seem to have it so much better have their own problems too#but then also i remember something i wrote down once as a teen. the phrase you typically hear#''i have been battling (?) with this problem but am lucky enough to have a support system / loving friends etc''#and idk how right i am with thinking this way but no matter what problems you have.#it's the toughest thing to lack deep connections with at least 1 person ideally like 3 i guess bc it's such a fundamental thing#you know having someone you can ALWAYS turn to without feeling bad and you know that they can and do turn to you too#and i do have a few wonderful friends i love so so much but i feel and know that no one needs me like i need them#every friendships feels so fragile to me. no one depends on me turns to me for advice or to vent etc#and when i feel like i need to do any of those things i cant turn to any of them#there's still inevitably a sort of disconnect i feel#and it terrifies me that i'll never find someone i connect with on a deeper level and it's mutual and we both can depend on each other#and there are no boundaries no shame no unspoken words#i dont know how true any of my feelings are but. but yeah#nesi rants
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skills include: walking quietly and scaring people by suddenly appearing in a room that had previously been empty
#whimsy whispers#this mostly applies to kitchens and hallways#anyways guess who went in the kitchen to put something away and scared someone#I went to the sink to put a spoon in there then to the pantry to put away the cookie butter so like#a few different places and they didn’t even notice til I was like deeper in the pantry#it’s because of how I walk#I use to use this to my advantage#on the opposite spectrum when I worked at walmart I use to walk intentionally loud in a way that made my footsteps clack so ppl would hear m#coming (I had a coworker ask what shoes I was wearing one day because of it like just normal shoes but I’m purposefully being loud)#the only way I manage to scare people is on accident#my attempts to scare people on purpose is laughable but me walking into a room has scared so many people#I again remind y’all that I have almost gotten things thrown at me countless times because of this#like please I just wanna go to other rooms can I please do this I’m not trying to scare you I just want a snack
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