#and certain fictional men that make me question everything I know

[katyspersonal]

I don't understand how there are people still supporting your content after it's clear you are an emotionally unstable narcissist. I swear some people care about their dumb fandoms more than common human decency.

First - I refuse to let my lore posts, drawings and theories be called 'content'. I protest. It is a very soulless term that reduces creativity (the very expression of the soul, mind you!) to some sort of shallow and more importantly, replaceable good. "Why you consume the content from this PROBLEMATIC :( person" in the same vein as "Why you buy your car fuel from an unethical corporation" is absolutely absurd in any way, because creations are not physical goods but something unique.

Second, you seem to be confused on what the fandom entails.

Being a fan of something, in fact, doesn't... really entail all that much? Being a fan of something doesn't, and will NEVER mean that you subscribe to certain cultural, religious, political or humanity values or opinions, it will NEVER be only for the ones the loudest people in the crowd deemed "right" and "pure" enough, and certainly it will NEVER be only for people with clear history *cough cough* or people of "proper" mental state *COUGH cough*.

The only, and only, and only, and ONLY "requirement" for being a Bloodborne fan is - to care about Bloodborne. Ironically, this is something people I tend to become antagonists with often fail at, as there is a difference between 'Bloodborne fan' and 'Mariadeline fan that knows nothing about BB lore and holds only interests in how to shame men more and what kind of fans to declare "problematic"' *COUGH COUGH* god sorry guys, got a bad cough attack during this ask fhdhgfds

But, again, I think we the people that obsess with this or that media came to the conclusion that gatekeeping leads to another extreme - the whole thing with shaming artists that draw something not accurate, and think something not 100% correct to the canon is 'dirtying' the canon. You know, the whole 'oh you are fan of X band? name 40 songs' thing. So I think gatekeeping should be avoided unless someone appears who is both completely uneducated about lore AND tries to set their own rules.

*COOOOOUGH COOOOOUGH*

But, yeah. Your confusion is likely caused by the fact that people who like Bloodborne... love to read about Bloodborne, and not about what user should be blacklisted and what character is this or that identity and what this or that character is "problematic" etc. I object the idea that certain game/movie/book/etc is only for "right" kind of people and I think we as society at this rate are capable of separating interaction with the fictional universe and personality/personal lives.

[riveatstoes]

The Charles Xavier Dr. Pepper Timeline (CXDPT)

i can feel in my bones that this is something hardcore X-Men fans are going to lose their minds over (because it’s already happened once in real life), so a quick DISCLAIMER: this is a joke! this is not a serious post, but is actually the culmination of an inside joke between me and my friend! laugh! it’s supposed to be funny.

so, almost two weeks ago now, me and my friend were chatting with a logan chatbot, and—as two people who ship scogan—decided to ask him about scott. and it replied by accidentally using she/her pronouns for him, thus giving us the first inkling of this horrible, horrible au: transmasc scott summers.

from there it wasn’t a long road to where we’re at now, which is…interesting, to say the least. we add onto this universe whenever we’re being stupid and the X-Men come up. for example, we were at work and hating it, so we thought “what if charles decided to make the X-Men work in fast food for a day, and they all abandon kurt inside to do every station himself”

goes without saying that now whenever we’re mad at our job, we express it out loud in mildly okay kurt wagner impressions.

but anyway, the main part of this post is next: the specifics of this AU, written out in a bullet point list of everything that’s canon in it. let me reiterate that this is for shits and giggles, so i don’t want to hear anything about “but _____ isn’t canon!!!” WE KNOW.

Everything Canon In The CXDPT

Charles was not born with his abilities, but instead gained them right after WWII. His parents offered him a crisp can of Dr. Pepper, and the sheer deliciousness gave him the powers we know him for

In order to maintain his abilities he has to drink an absurd amount of Dr. Pepper daily

TRANSGENDER SCOTT!!!

Scogan is real and they’re insufferable

Laura is a Disney Channel / Hannah Montana girlie and makes Logan watch with her (he’s secretly also a fan)

Jean is transphobic. This is a repercussion of her having almost no personality in the original movie trilogy. She was also hit by the lesbianism beam

Laura got Hollywood Undead banned in the mansion

Kurt has a mysterious BF who just stands next to him most of the time and enjoys throwing rocks at Magneto (Kurt doesn’t take part in this but does encourage it)

Charles uses his telepathy to harass Scott into bringing him Dr. Pepper (the others don’t care as much so manipulation doesn’t work)

“Hey Scott, it’s me, Charles Xavier. Remember how my legs don’t work? Do you see this wheelchair? Wanna bring me a Dr. Pepper about it, Scott?”

Laura got banned from MovieStarPlanet for harassing and cussing out her “ex-boyfriend”

Mystique and Rogue defend anything questionable that Laura does by going “Oh come ON guys she’s JUST a GIRL!!!”

Storm is the only normal one here. Everyone else ages her so very badly just by being their pure, unaltered selves

Scott is actually Y/N

Cherik is canon but only in a “it’s my weekend with the kids, I don’t care if it’s your birthday, I only get to see them once every other week ASSHOLE” kind of way

we acknowledge that this is quite the departure for certain characters, but the thing is that they’re fictional characters so what harm is this actually doing? this AU was purely made to fit our senses of humor which aren’t always the best, to say the least, but it’s funny to us.

hope you enjoyed this post but you probably didn’t, if i’m honest.

[kingconia]

ROOK HUNT & MALLEUS DRACONIA WITH S/O, WHO IS YANDERE FOR THEM

Content warnings: obsessive & possessive behaviour, stalking, a very (very) strange romance.

A/N: Feel a need to warn you, that I am by no means romanticising the yandere concept. This work was written merely as a fiction, and due to me, wondering, what could happen if for once in these writing concept a ”yandere one” would be not a Twisted character, but MC.

Malleus Draconia. 💚

— Malleus is very far from the idea of romance in the mortal world, and therefore, his actions might or might not appear quite unusual or creepy. For example, how would he know that sitting by someone's bed, when they are sleeping, is not a common thing? Lilia did it all the time, to him and Silver, both...

— And, even worse, Malleus is possessive in the way all fae are. It only multiples on his natural fear of being abandoned;

— So, when he realises, with help of other students, that some of his courting methods sound problematic, he tries to change it for you. He truly doesn't want his precious child of men to be threatened by him!

— Malleus minimises his own views on the romantic relationship, and, instead, goes for usual relationship goals that he learns from people;

— In the meantime, Malleus is also begin to feel someone's eyes on himself all the time. It reminds him much of a few days, when vice from Pomefiore tried to hunt him down, but failed, since Malleus saw and heard everything;

— But a certain someone is absolutely spotless in his watching. It is worrying, but Malleus decides to find out the culprit himself, without dragging others in a mess;

— Malleus is not ready, when he finds out that it had been you all alone...

•

”I am struggling with understanding the meaning of this, the child of men,” Malleus murmurs softly, eyes tracing on the wall of your room.

This wall—the one that used to be covered with another layer of the wallpaper before—is full of his photos. Of photos of people, who he spoke with. Some others blurry shots of events in school. And messy writings filling it too, all in the same questions.

Where? When? Who? WHO?

”I am, too, my love,” you smile as you sit down on the edge of your bed. ”Perhaps, you could answer me, Malleus. Who?”

What you did, do—or will do—doesn't sound right to his ears. It is reminding him of what Cater accused him a few months ago. Stalking. And Malleus knows, it is not healthy—doesn't seem like—but he can't help but a tremble in this sheer excitement.

You care for him so much.

”Who is this person who took your attention from me, Malleus?”

He blinks, turning to you in a poor confusion.

”What are you talking about?”

Your eyes, suddenly chilly, glaring at him with so much fierceness, that Malleus feels he is suffocating. You are suffocating, and he wants to choke on you.

”You used to love me, Malleus,” you start quietly. ”You used to love me so much. I remember you coming to my bedroom in the night, watching me as I slept or tried to. I left window open for you, hadn't you noticed? I remember how you walked me down time to time—me, on the ground, leaving the classrooms, with you, hiding on the roofs—always watching. And then, it stopped.”

Suddenly, you yank him by his tie. As Malleus gasps for air, almost instinctively, you make him lean forward, hands balking in the mattress of the bed automatically.

”So, Malleus, tell me. Who caught your attention now?”

There is a madness twirling in the pit of your eyes, and Malleus desperately needs to see more of it. He can't help but ravel in your love, to smile with the corners of his lips turning upwards.

You love him, you love him, you love him!

You are just as afraid of being left as he is.

”I checked all school, Malleus,” you laugh tauntingly. ”Every single student. And teacher, too. I roamed through your room, through Lilia's room. I casted spells, I made potions and poisons. And I am this close to marge in the Briar Valley, if you are not answering me right now, because I swear—”

Malleus captures your lips in his. He feels your grip on the necktie becoming stronger, pulling him even closer, and he melts, defeated. You squeeze him between your thigs, caging, allowing him only to sink down, on his knees, and he laughs right in your wet mouth.

”You,” he whispers, fangs scratching your lips fleetingly. ”I only ever loved you. And I am so sorry for neglecting you for so long, I am so sorry for not understanding that I am just as much yours, as you are mine.”

You don't look convinced, but Malleus is not surprised. You spent a month, going through all researches. He would go insane on your place.

”Take me, my dear. Take me.”

Or maybe, you are insane. But, oh, how nice it feels... To spiral into madness together.

”I am going to consume every part of you, Malleus. Mark my words,” you hiss, licking in his open mouth. ”And then, I will mark you.”

Malleus wouldn't dream of the better lover to himself.

Rook Hunt. 💜

— Recently, Rook feels like he suddenly became the main character in one of his pretty housewarden's movies. And it all because... Someone is watching him;

— He is surprised, naturally. It is his job. He is the one that sees everything and everyone, that hunts down people. So why he feels someone's eyes on his back now?

— Oh, he is excited. Rook can't figure out who is challenging him! He can't find a scent, he doesn't hear sounds, he has nothing! Absolutely nothing! How absolutely alluring!

— The most entertaining part is that his hunter doesn't even try to hide from him that much? At least, this person always offers him some hints that he follows him around;

— Rook knows that someone had been in his room. He knows, that his things had been looked at—even though, all of them hadn't moved even for an inch, he can say—and that is because... Someone leaves him gifts;

— It is the most curious things. Things he needed the most, things he mentioned in some conversations with his classmates earlier. Rook mentions about wanting to buy a new camera in the conversation with Cater, and he already has one, when he returns. He murmurs something about needing a new arrow set on his hunt? Well. He has it now;

— Despite searching all the school for his hunter, Rook is completely surprised when you reveal yourself. How could you, a quiet first-year, pull something like this? He would never guess that you had it in yourself! What a beautiful gift you are...

•

”My, my,” Rook murmurs, lips slightly partied as he is looking at you in awe. ”I had never thought that someone's shadow can suppress its owner, mon petit chasseur!”

You offer him a crooked smirk. As you straddling him to the ground, a knife that was stolen from him a few weeks ago, pressed to his neck, you look wild.

Everything about you is wild, and Rook feels as if he finally found what he was searching all these years. Not a perfection, but a perfect storm.

”Oh no,” you rasp, your breath tickling the line of his jaw. ”No, no, dear. There is nothing and no one that could be better than you, Rook. If anyone tries to take your place, they would be dead.”

Rook was wrong, then. It is not just about the hunter becoming a pray. Oh no. It is about praiser becoming a subject of praise.

Rook's cheeks grow hot with his realisation.

He had never considered himself worth of being hunted down. Of being adored. He is nothing but a mere human with limited powers, and he could offer nothing to inspire people on creating art. What he hunts, he lacks to see in himself.

Yet...

You find him worth of all this? You see him as someone genuinely important?

”Do you really think so?” Rook finds himself asking quietly.

The way your eyes light up as he says that, the way your smile widens—Rook had never seen such a pure excitement directed at him. He can say it easily, even now: he is at your mercy.

You can do whatever you want with him—he volunteers. Because no one had ever looked at him like that. Because no one had ever seen him.

”Oh, Rook, my the most perfect Rook,” you whisper, using your free hand to smooth his hair gently. ”All my love, all adore I have—it is all for you, can't you see? I bring the best things for you, and I do the best thing to your sake. I put Kingscholar under this sleeping spell, so he wouldn't hear or feel anything that day. Just for you. And I would do so much more! Just because you... You make me feel emotions. And you make me want to create. But most importantly... You make me want to destroy. How it is not something that only someone unique as you can do?”

He can see his own reflection in your eyes. In a way Rook sees himself in you—this love, this obsession, this hunger—and in a way he realises how absolutely beautiful he is from your perspective.

He loves it, he loves it.

”You are absolutely charmingly insatiable, mon fidèle compagnon!” Rook bubbles, a high laughter escaping his lips as he raises his body slightly up, ignoring how the steel touches his skin more firmly. ”I implore you to plunge this knife in my heart, crave your initials on it—it is yours. All of it.”

Beautiful. You are beautiful. Outside and inside.

He wants to have you on the leash, just for himself, but even more, he wishes to curl in your legs as a loyal dog.

Yours, yours, yours.

”Rook,” you sigh with containment, hiding the weapon away. ”How can I do that, if my own bleeds just for you?”

You kiss him with the same passion you followed him for months. You kiss him, and his world collapses in a way he can't hold himself any longer.

He takes. And as you slide your tongue in his mouth, you take, too.

”Then let it bleed, ma folie. And let our blood bleed for each other.”

He wants yours arrows pierced all over his heart, and you know, you has his own stuck inside your heart, roo.

And what it is, if not the love?

[bellaxgiornata]

Honestly I cannot believe that I've been on tumblr for just over a year now and somehow there's already so many of you wonderful people here that are reading, enjoying, and supporting my silly little fics. When I jumped over here from AO3, I had not anticipated how much fun I was going to have getting to chat with all of y'all while also sharing my stories with those of you who aren't on AO3. I've definitely made some wonderful friends this past year because of tumblr and I just want to say thank you to everyone for the support. I always mean it when I say y'all are the reason I keep writing these stories 💖

I could certainly get sappier but instead I'll just invite y'all to join me for my first ever celebration! There's a few fun things below the cut that y'all can pop up with in my ask box starting today May 3 through Wednesday May 8! I tried to think of some interesting things that I could realistically make time to do with everything currently going on in my life, especially because I'm also still trying to stockpile rough drafts for many of my stories so that I can still have updates during my upcoming "writing hiatus" (that I'll explain more about later). My plan is to answer things as they come in and hopefully have them all finished shortly after the celebration ends. And once the celebration finally ends, I'm hoping to give y'all an update to a story or a one shot!

Hopefully this will be fun for everyone!

Let's Chat! - Feel free to send me an ask about anything at all! No, seriously. You want to tell me about your day? An upcoming vacation or exciting accomplishment of yours? Do it! Or maybe you want to ask me questions about one of my stories or my writing process? Hell, feel free to ask me about myself, chat about coffee, music, books, pets, whatever!

Discuss Headcanons with Me! - Have any headcanons about Matt Murdock, Frank Castle, or Michael Kinsella that you want to chat about or share with me? Send them in! Or are you interested in a headcanon I might have about one of them in a certain situation? Feel free to ask! We can chat about the boys!

Send Me Fake FFTD Installment Titles! - Create a title name for an installment for my Falling for the Devil series (ex. "The [insert title]") and I'll write a couple of sentences about what I could picture that installment being about! You win bonus points if you can actually stump me on coming up with a plot for your title. But also who knows, maybe some title suggestions could spark an idea for future updates...

Let's Play a Game! - We can play would you rather, have you ever, or fuck/marry/kiss (or kill). For the record, f/m/k can be with anyone from Daredevil, Punisher, Defenders, Kin, or even any of Charlie's characters that I'm familiar with (Matt, Michael, Owen, Henry, Tristan, or Adam) or those of Jon's that I'm familiar with (mainly Frank, Shane, or Julian). If you can think of another game feel free to play it with me!

Ask the Boys! - Do you enjoy my weird internal dialogues with fictional characters that probably make me sound crazy? Great! Feel free to send me an ask to either one or all of the fictional men that live in my head (Matt, Frank, and/or Mikey) and I'll relay whatever they respond with in something of a short internal dialogue!

Request a Sneak Peak! - Since I have been stockpiling quite a few WIPs and rough drafts for a couple of months now, I am open to y'all just requesting a sneak peak. If you do, I will share a snippet from a fic I choose at random from something that's either a fully finished rough draft or still a work in progress!

**You're more than welcome to participate multiple times, but all I ask is that you (1) send things in separate asks, (2) are not rude to me or anyone else, and (3) are 18+ to discuss anything spicy (this is an 18+ blog anyway so I'd hope everyone here already is).**

[0lshadyl0]

Do you think asl would work well together or would it end up as disaster? ( can it be Yandere please )

I'll assume darling is female since you didn't specify

Are you really asking this question? With Ace, Sabo, and Luffy? Let's be honest, they have the best sibling relationship without sharing blood ties in the entire series (and other series... I don't know, it's not like I can afford to watch other animes, besides the rest of my free time I spend playing Genshin Impact), so if what you are looking for is a polyamorous relationship, either platonic or romantic (in the latter rule out Luffy because he can only be yandere platonic, I don't see in my head how this guy could feel romantic desires for someone, no, just not), ASL is your best bet

Now if we go to the dynamics of how the relationship would work, it will depend a lot on how it is formed and in what sense, for example, if it is a healthy platonic relationship between siblings (and in the specific case that it was formed when they were all children being slaughtered by Garp and his fists of love), then we would be seeing that they will treat you the same as Luffy, or in case you are younger than them, (Ace and Sabo), they will be a little more overprotective of you, if you are even younger than Luffy (or if you are female), in the beginning of your adventurous years you will not be alone, at least you will be in a pirate group under the command of Ace or Luffy, (Sabo does not count because we will presume him dead at that time), girls cannot go outside unsupervised sea, not with all those perverts sailing the seas in search of beautiful young and fertile girls (I see you Shanks, Mihwak, caesar, DOFLAMINGO) and all those old bastards who didn't get married in time and feel lonely and misunderstood since their children ignore them (kaido)

Now going to the field where the beautiful stops being so beautiful and love becomes sick:

Yandere ASL Platonic Polyamorous Relationship

• In this situation, I assure you that it is 100% Luffy's fault and his ability to make other platonic yanderes

• Any chance of forming a romantic relationship with Ace or Sabo dies if the first of these three you meet is Luffy.

• Because, if he says that you are brothers, my dear, you are family

• And no, they are not the type of family where the brothers want to marry each other (disgustingly cool in fiction but fucking disgusting if it is in real life, say no to incest, there are many fish in the sea and many 2D men/women to simp (Nico Robin, my love))

• Get ready to always be accompanied by one of them, privacy? what is that? is it eaten?

• Also keep in mind that you are Ace's emotional support every time he has his attacks of “I'm Roger's son, everyone hates me, I hate myself too”, I think, out of the three, it's him that you will spend more time

• Until Luffy comes to steal you because he found a new island with very cool animals and he wants to go on an adventure with you.

• Really the one who has to manage everything in the relationship and be 'the older brother' is Sabo

• Poor him, considering all the extra work he has as a revolutionary, now he also has to deal with the fact that his brothers don't want to share (Luffy is the most possessive of the three and the one who starts the fights)

• So when you get frustrated go with Sabo, you will have time for yourself while you are watched by the piercing eyes of the revolutionary

I will not speak more about this dynamic because the post will be longer than it already is, besides that it looks like another request that they made to me, I will delve into it more calmly in that future post

Yandere AS, Romantic Polyamorous relationship Platonic with L

• The way in which this relationship occurs, is by following certain rules that, first of all, is doing the opposite of the platonic relationship, in what sense? you may be asking me

• Simple, Luffy shouldn't meet you first.

• If you meet Luffy first it's game over, from now on you have three brothers, live with it

• You can have the opportunity to be Sabo's darling, be part of the revolutionaries, or he saving you from some injustice (he has a hero complex, it increases if you are a woman)

• With Ace you can find him on Whitebeard's ship (maybe being his daughter? A nurse? Marco's apprentice? (I would be, I don't hesitate) are you stupid or ridiculously strong enough to face the yonkou?, I don't know, you tell me) or literally on any random island that he visited while looking for Teach (or you guys met in Wano, the possibilities are limitless)

• Or in an invented scenario where we are all happy, Ace did not die in marineford and was reunited with his brother who he presumed dead in a tragicomic scene with many tears, emotions, and heartbreaking flashbacks

• In any case, the second rule is that Sabo and Ace must discover you at the same time, note that this is important because although neither of them is possessive, Sabo is a jealous person and although he would never do anything to hurt Ace, if he chooses you first, he won't share you, what Sabo will do is manipulate Ace into looking the other way while he stays with you

• Let's remember, Sabo is a manipulative and protective yandere, Ace is another protective yandere, but he is also delusional and that is what puts him at a disadvantage compared to Sabo who thinks with a cooler head

• So if you stick to these rules, congratulations, you now have two very hot boyfriends and an annoying brother-to-be who is going to irritate his older siblings because he wants to hang out with his brothers's girlfriend.

• Basically this relationship is based on Sabo having control of the dynamics between the four of you (distracting Luffy, keeping Ace stable and his delusions, keeping an eye on you, you know, everything a manipulator can control)

[enihk-writes]

[at the end of a burnt wick]

pairing: tang bo x afab!she/her!reader

NOT exactly an x reader because i didn't want tang bo and reader's relationship to be romantic, tried to make them platonic / co-workers like ah-duo and the emperor from the apothecary diaries + implied tangchung because all roads lead to old men yaoi

summary: anthology of a married pair

content warning: archaic wedding practices mentioned (i.e. having to consummate a marriage against the will of both parties) // stillbirth and child loss (disconnect with traditional expectations of parenthood)

word count: 6.66k

author's note: my roman empire lately is about how i used to audition to nijisanji and only niji at least 3-4 times (didn't even pass the first stage lol) before i got really fixated with rotbb.... maybe one day i will try my hand at vtubing and streaming again... for now it's fanfiction time ragggghhh!!!!! fictional men 4ever!!!!

[PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION! I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY TRIGGERS CAUSED BEYOND THIS LINE]

═══════════════

FIRST MEETING

the first time the young tang bo met her, was when he was a little over fifteen.

she was also just as young as he — a wee lass that had yet to lose the childlike roundness of her cheeks, round eyes that seemed to sparkle in wonderment at all the grandeur around her. tang bo didn't understand what was so special about the surroundings, he'd grown up here all his life and had already seen most of anything money could buy. this girl was weird.

he didn't find out until much later that this was the first time she had ever left the four walls of her room, much less her own home.

he thinks that it was no wonder she had looked so amazed with everything she saw back then. he can't imagine a life where he had to live constrained to one place, going through the same routine everyday would have bored him to death.

he wasn't looking forward to future conversations with that girl — he was certain she would be utterly dull and boring.

═══════════════

ENGAGEMENT

tang bo was furious that the elders had went and signed off the engagement contract without even asking for his approval. he had been meeting with countless hopefuls for a few years by now, and he'd been able to fend them all off by acting in ways that had all these well-bred ladies huffing and puffing in indignation. crying to their fathers that they would rather die than marry a man like he.

so who was it that agreed to this!

tang bo mutters under his breath, teeth gritted, fists clenched. he had to see with his own two eyes the woman who was stupid or desperate enough to let herself be wed to the likes of him.

elder!

the young man throws open the doors to the main hall, not caring one bit about the guests sitting inside. the elders and the patriarch in question frowned at his behaviour, biting their tongues from chastising him in front of strangers.

his gaze lands on a familiar face, a little older and a lot less naive, but familiar nonetheless. he didn't know that a person's demeanour could change so drastically in a few years.

tang bo's hands fall to his sides, he shuffles towards the end of the table, plopping down on the empty spot across his soon-to-be betrothed. he eyes her figure, chewing on the inside of his mouth, trying to come up with something to insult her with.

tang bo—

the patriarch didn't even get the chance to finish his sentence when the young man scoffs at the girl's face, the corner of his mouth pulling up into a sneer.

really? her?

tang bo glances over at the heads of his family, finger pointing rudely in the girl's face. they all sigh, knowing what was about to come from the impudent boy. they could only hope this girl wouldn't take his jabs to heart.

hey you.

he juts his chin at her.

all my other candidates looked prettier than you. hey, did you even bother to put in any effort when coming to meet me?

she ignored him, sipping on her tea serenely. the girl's guardians shift in their seats nervously. ah, this young master has yet to face their mistress' infamous anger.

tang bo clicks his tongue.

oi, did you even — hey!

he didn't expect her to splash the remainder of her drink onto him. the warm liquid splatters across his face and drips down his now damp hair, even the front of his robes were now soiled from the tea.

he looks over to the elders of his family in surprise, hoping that they'd stand up for him but none met his eye. he felt betrayed when he catches some of them trying to hide the twitch of their mouths suppressing their laughs.

they all thought that it was about time someone put this boy in his place, talented and intelligent as he may be.

needless to say, the rest of the meeting went on smoothly. and it ended with the confirmation of the two's engagement. much to tang bo's despair and the girl's indifference.

═══════════════

FIRST 'DATE'

he really tried his best to drag his feet that day. the elders had arranged for an evening dinner in the newly established inn downtown with his bride-to-be and tang bo really did not want to go. he was kicking up a fuss with his clothes, this one was too dull, that one is too bright, it's too rough, it's too short... and so on. but when he finally ran out of excuses and the attendants tiredly managed to dress him appropriately — the sun was beginning to set.

tang bo perks up. perhaps he didn't have to go out with her after all!

he steps out of his room, surprised to see that there was no one in the courtyard. he shouldn't have felt a jolt of worry then, but he did, and he wondered if something was wrong.

where is she?

he asks to no one in particular, heading to her room three doors down from his, footfalls heavy on the lacquered wooden planks of the corridor. he hears panicked voices muffled behind the doors and throws the doors to her room open.

she sat in the middle of the room in nothing but her undergarments, surrounded by the tang estate's maids and piles of unworn clothes. she had her back facing him, and all he could see were the maids hurriedly hiding away the containers of makeup all shying away from his scrutinising gaze.

out.

the maids didn't have to be told twice. they all scurried out of her room like mice, tails between their legs and faces pursed in anxiety at being caught in the middle of something they probably shouldn't be doing. tang bo sighed heavily. to think the woman he was to marry was getting bullied, by mere maids too? he felt ashamed on her behalf. he didn't like people who were fine with others taking advantage and stepping all over them. he hated that they didn't have a backbone to stand up for themselves.

kicking off his shoes, he entered her room — nose scrunched up instinctively at the suffocating dust in the air. he looked around to see all the windows shut tightly, there were no gaps for even a sliver of light to shine inside.

how has this girl been living so far, for her to be fine with this treatment?

tang bo coughed, stumbling over to open the windows, lightheaded from the lack of breathable air. he waves his hands to chase the dust outside, coughing even harder when the little particles get all up in his face.

he hears her giggle. much to his growing annoyance, what was so funny anyway.

he sits in front of her, letting the pile of unworn clothes cushion him from the hard floor. under the orange glow of the setting sun, he sees her for the first time today, all dolled up in the most garish makeup that would have certainly humiliated her, and had he not barged in she would have had to go around in public like that.

you look uglier today.

she chuckled and hummed in response, she looks around in search of something. grabbing a rag from under the clothes, she proceeded to wipe off her painted face, only to have tang bo take it out of her hands with a soft, let me.

he holds her chin between his fingers, rubbing off the white powder that contrasted starkly against her skin, making her look sickly. he rubs off the crudely drawn-out eyebrows and the thick rouge that sat on her lips. he can't help but notice the way her lashes fluttered as she tried to keep her eyes closed. maybe his fiancee was a little cute.

with her face now bare, the girl lets out the breath she had been holding. but tang bo wasn't done yet.

where are you facing. turn back here.

he ordered pointedly, and she couldn't help but to go back into her prior position. lips and eyes squeezed shut, much like a puppy getting told off for misbehaving.

picking up a brush out of the many lying haphazardly over the vanity, tang bo dipped it's tip into the little porcelain jar left ajar. it was lipstick in a shade deep red, the type that would have looked lovely especially on her.

he holds the girl's now bare face in one hand, the brush in the other, outlining the shape of her lips with the new rouge. the feathery touch of the brush tip was ticklish, moreso with how tang bo had been holding it in an uncharacteristically gentle way as though he were a potter painting intricate patterns on a cup before he sent it off to the burning fires in a kiln.

he pinched the brush, smudging the tint against his fingers and drawing faint circles at the outer corner of her eyes.

tang bo leans back to admire his handiwork. he couldn't help but feel proud of the results. not only was he good at martial arts and medicine, he had an amazing eye for aesthetics too? where would anyone find a better husband then he?

the girl opens her eyes cautiously, her gaze meeting his. he looked pleased, boastful even.

hmph. you look more presentable now.

he hands her a mirror, and as she looks at her reflection against the shiny bronze surface, she had to agree. her fiance had done a good job with her face. maybe he wasn't all that awful.

thank you, young master tang.

the girl smiled, her eyes crinkling upwards in a smile. tang bo scoffs and looks out the window, hiding his embarrassment at her sincere words. thinking back now, this was the first he'd heard her speak, wasn't it? maybe he should pay more attention once in a while.

heh. of course you should be thanking me.

the sky and grown dark. lucky him, he didn't have to go out to that dinner with her after all.

═══════════════

THE FIRST REAL DATE

tang bo felt a little irked that she had been walking behind him even when he had slowed down to match her pace. it's almost like she had been deliberately hanging back.

you.

he grabs her wrist and pulls her towards him. she stumbled over her feet and falls over with a startled squeak.

you're my fiancee. so stand proud and walk beside me.

he declares with a hand on his hip, the grip on her wrist with his other not once loosening. he walks again, just as slow as he had been earlier, feeling a little happy that the girl no longer lagged behind.

he'd started to warm up to her, no longer seeing her as the stranger living in his house, one day to become his wife. she was more akin to a little sister he'd have to babysit.

no, actually she was more like an apprehensive kitten left on his doorstep that he'd grown to like taking care of.

buying her sweets and spoiling her with accessories she might not even have a chance to wear just because he thought she'd look cute in them has been one of his favourite hobbies these days.

why was he so anxious about getting engaged before? ever since she became his fiancee, he didn't have to go out and meet with any more annoying noble ladies clamouring over each other trying to win over his affection. the best part was that she kept to herself, and minded her own business unless it was time to visit the elders and the patriarch for afternoon tea — which he didn't mind since having her as his own personal walking event reminder has really saved him from getting scolded even more by the old farts.

ah! look! they're selling meat skewers over there! come on, let's go get some! i'm sure you'd like those too.

tang bo giggles and drags the girl over to another street vendor. ah, lucky him. he's hit the jackpot with the whole engagement game — a tolerable and cute wife-to-be, could a boy ask for anything more? guanyin-ma really was looking over him after all.

═══════════════

FORTUNE TELLER

after two seasons of living under the same roof, the heads of the tang clan decide that it was time for the two to meet with the fortune teller. set up an auspicious date through the tung shing, and be wed on the right phase of the moon and the best placement of the stars in the sky.

the young master is lucky to have found someone this compatible. it is hard for children born in his year to find a suitable partner. they say snakes rarely get along with the other zodiacs.

says the old eccentric woman who proclaimed herself to be the best fortune teller in sichuan and the one who had been checking the birthdates of all the potential brides that had been introduced to tang bo thus far. the boy felt the urge to get up and fight that hack, respecting his elders be damned, so she was the one sending him all those insufferable girls his way.

he feels a hand grab at his arm. fingers digging into his flesh enough to keep him seated. he looks over at the girl sitting next to him, expression unchanging, her body angled to lean a little closer to his.

his hand reached over discreetly to peel her fingers off him, bringing her hand down to hold his under the table, fingers intertwined. she seemed to relax a little, tense shoulders falling ever gently, her jaw growing slightly more slack.

to the untrained eye, the girl's expressions were the same. but to him, he's watched her long enough, even if it wasn't every day, to spot the subtle changes whenever she expressed herself. tang bo pats himself on the back for being such an attentive fiance.

his attention shifted from the conversation between the fortune teller and the elders to the girl's hand. they were soft and smooth, as expected of a lady of noble birth. his on the other hand were calloused from training, the tips of his fingers were starting to turn darker from the constant exposure to poisons. shit, he might have to start wearing gloves.

the girl hadn't been paying attention to the conversation going on either, spacing out until the elders called on the two. stifling their startled gasp, the two youngins stared at their elders, a confused expression painted on their faces, not one bit guilty for ignoring everything that was being said.

ah, it's good they are getting along well.

the fortune teller chuckled with a knowing glint in her eye trying to suggest something, but both tang bo and the girl didn't seem to catch her drift, the old woman's point flying over their heads.

the elders soon turn back to their discussion, talking about the best days that would suit the two.

look here, since they are both born as snakes, their auspicious numbers are two, eight and nine. i'd suggest we hold the wedding...

tang bo nudges at the girl.

hey.

she looks up at him. he leaned down next to her ear, wanting to ask her about her birthday, too embarrassed to ask about it outright in front of the elders. he didn't want to seem like an incompetent fiance to his future bride.

she hides a growing grin. it was nice of him to start paying attention to her. little steps, little steps. she wriggles her hand out of his grasp and writes down the date with her finger on the surface of his palm.

good thing their hands were under the table, or people would know about the cause of the redness dusting the back of his ears.

the meeting dragged on until late in the evening. it ended with the agreement that they were to be wed on the eighth day of the eighth month on the eighth year of the emperor's reign.

truly the most auspicious day for a union.

═══════════════

A BRIDE-TO-BE'S DRESSING ROOM

the long-awaited day came by later than expected. the previous emperor passed before he even got close to the eighth year of his reign. not wanting to change the numbers of the date, the elders decided to push the event back until the current emperor had reached his eighth year.

by then, the two had grown into a man and a woman, a lot older than the common age to be wed. but it was no matter. who would dare speak up against the tang clan's young master and his wife-to-be?

the day, hell, even the night before had been hectic. tang bo slipped past his attendants to take a peak at what was going on in her room. traditions be damned, who cares about the groom not seeing his bride until they were at the altar? that was so outdated!

what are you doing here?

she had been left alone to rest from the non-stop preparations since before dawn. tang bo walks in, careful not to make too much noise as he slides the door shut behind him.

why? can't i visit my wife?

i am not your wife.

yet~

his teasing voice moved behind her. he picked up the brush to comb out the knots that were all tangled up — the maids had put on extensions to lengthen her hair. she hadn't been able to grow them to the expected length, much to the annoyance of the maids. they hadn't been nice when attaching the accessories, she could still feel the burning sensation on her scalp.

there was no need to kick up a fuss at this point. especially in front of tang bo. this guy would have kicked out all the attendants who had been treating her poorly, but that felt like too easy of a punishment. she wanted to deal with them herself when the time comes, sorry for that, young master tang.

the leather gloves he wore were cold, and the feeling of his fingertips scratching against her scalp was soothing, enough to draw out a quiet purr from the woman. much to her shocked embarassment.

oh?

she leans away from him.

...please ignore that.

but how could he?

my wife... how can you be so cute~!

i need you to shut up right now.

═══════════════

WORLD'S MOST BORING CEREMONY

if it was any consolation, the two had agreed that this whole affair was a pain in their ass.

wife, do you know when this will end?

what makes you think i have the answer to that?

tang bo thinks his bride was lucky to have that red veil over her face. if she wanted to shut her eyes and sleep, none of the guests nor elders would be any wiser. poor old him. they should have made a veil for the goom too, which smartass decided otherwise anyway? if he ever met that person, tang bo promised he would pummel the other to the ground.

wife.

she hums in acknowledgement, bowing her head at a guest who had come up to the front to pay their blessings to the pair.

wife.

tang bo called out again, his tone getting a little impatient. wincing when he felt her pinch the skin between his thumb and index finger. he tried to smile at the strangers passing them by, feeling drained and completely spent from the day's activities. it didn't help that the noisy chatter of everyone around them was making him feel worse.

wife, you should tell the elders that you're tired and want to rest for the night... i'm sure they'd listen to you.

why me? you go!

huh? me? nuh-uh, you go!

the back and forth lasted for a bit until they both agreed to ask the elders together. after all, having a partner-in-crime to take the fall together with you was way better than facing backlash alone.

perhaps the atmosphere of a wedding had put the elders in a carefree mood, perhaps it was the result of a dozen empty wine bottles. they think it might be both, but no matter, they received permission to get out of there.

the best news either had ever heard today.

scurring away quickly, the newlyweds giggle amongst each other like kids up to no good even as they were well into their twenties. the guests and elders cooed in amusement, talking about how nice it must be to be young and in love.

though that second part was so far from the truth, when the two talk about it again in their later years, it had grown into a funny story they liked to reminisce about over a midnight drink.

═══════════════

THE FIRST NIGHT

tang bo glanced over at his wife, carrying the same grimace as she did. it was hard not to cringe at the overtly crude decorations in their now shared room.

right. that was how it was in these parts. they were now husband and wife so the elders are probably expecting the results of the two carrying out their marital duties within the next year.

i don't want to do that...

me neither...

now sitting across each other on the floor, they discuss how to trick the maids who would certainly check the bedding the next morning. if nothing happened tonight then they would be under more scrutiny. but who's to say that there won't be any surveillance after? ugh! this was all so annoying!

tang bo watched as the woman before him let out a big sigh, dropping her head into her hands. he felt sorry for his wife, it must be hard living as the new daughter-in-law of his family.

should we get this done and over with?

he suggested finally, after exhausting all their options. his wife makes a face at that, but she can't argue.

awkwardly he hands over a vial, an all-purpose antidote of sorts, in case she gets accidentally poisoned while coming into contact with him. the head had passed it to him sometime during the ceremony earlier, tang bo had been hoping he didn't have to use it, at least he held himself back from throwing the whole vial at the wall when it was given.

he didn't say it at first, but he could hear the eyes and ears surrounding them grow careless every few moments, revealing their presence by accident with an unintentional movement or sound. how uncouth of them to be watching the two newlyweds like this. it seemed she'd also noticed their presence, with how she'd glance out the windows whenever a small rustle was heard.

i'm so sorry.

he murmured an apology as he kissed her cheek — he didn't have to look to know she had a faint look of disdain, directed to no one in particular yet still stung through his heart.

it's not your fault.

so she says. but it might as well be. to him at least.

the consummation wasn't a pleasant process. neither could look at the other in the eye. the knowledge that people were standing outside the room to listen in on the completion of their marriage made this whole ordeal so much worse.

wife...i...

tang bo feels his hips stutter, his face burns in shame as his hoarse voice tries to speak.

her hands reach out to brush his hair out of his face, fingertips lightly smooth out the crease of his furrowed brows. she'd resigned herself long ago, knowing this whole process was inevitable from the time she reached adolescence. to think her own husband did not...

she felt a slight twinge of pity. the young master tang was a lot more sheltered than she had thought.

when it was all over, they scrambled to get away from the other, each sitting at the furthest end of the bed — letting what had conspired sink in. how many more times would this have to happen in the future?

she was the first to collect herself. getting up, she shuffles over to tang bo, her hand reaching out for his.

my husband, we should go and clean up.

he nodded, taking her hand in his wordlessly as she led him to the tub hidden behind the partition. after dipping the dry towels in the now warm water to wipe their bodies clean, slipping into clean nightgowns and peeling off the soiled bedspreads to throw them aside, they finally crawl under the covers, yawning tiredly.

sleep came over easily, surprisingly enough.

═══════════════

DIAGNOSIS

the questions that hung around in the air at this time of the year were all about babies, children, the next generation. everyone wanted to know which of the wedded members would be expecting soon.

most eyes were turned on tang bo and his wife.

unfortunately.

their marriage had happened over five years ago, almost ten, and all this time their other relatives who had gotten married later than they were popping out one offspring after another — yet none were to be seen for the young lord and his lady. the elders often lamented on the silence of their side of the estate.

rumour has it that their relationship was on the rocks, with how neither shared a room nor did they spend a night together like all the tang spouses — save for the occasional times they'd go to visit the other's quarters every two to three months. to scratch an itch as one might say. after all, they were still young and quite healthy, so such urges were still common occurrences. might as well do it with someone familiar rather than do that with a stranger.

the relationship between tang bo and his wife was actually far more amicable than anyone could have guessed. it was hard to describe the solace they'd found in each other's unspoken commanderie within the household. they'd been living together long enough to know virtually everything about each other, yet there was always a line drawn between them to keep the distance.

today, she wasn't here for any of their usual arrangements. tang bo had came back to find his wife nursing a cup of tea in one hand, resting it on top of a propped-up leg. she had set out a game of weiqi on the table, next to a steaming teapot and array of snacks.

looks like someone's got news.

his teasing voice called out to the woman, settling down on the seat across her. he hums in thought, contemplating his move as she places down her white bead on the board.

your uncle came over to see why we weren't having kids yesterday. he's given me the results this morning, right after you left.

the woman holds out the folded paper, a little crumpled from being kept between the layers of her robes. tang bo takes it, opening it to read what his so-called uncle had diagnosed his wife with. talk about elder butting into a youngster's business for no good reason.

this...

he says that i'm barren.

she looks down with a small smile,and it looked a little bitter. of course, how could she not be? after all that had happened those few years back?

to say that she's unable to carry a child after all she had gone through back then was such a cruel prank from the heavens. he knows his wife wanted to be a mother more than anything, to give that little baby all her love in the world or along those sentiments — as did he. so if that's not going to happen... then, what now?

they were silent as they moved their beads across the game board. contemplating their next moves and what to say to the other.

there's crab stick snacks here, you should try some.

as always, she breaks the silence first. grabbing a few sticks of the salty treat to nibble on before handing the container over to her husband. tang bo reached for the food mindlessly, thinking about how nice it'd be to have these with some sweet wine.

ah, but his wife wasn't much of a drinker so that's a bummer.

═══════════════

ONLY CHILD

he should have heard the cries of the baby.

it was quiet inside, and out where he was waiting too. the nurses and maids walked out of the room with buckets of soiled, bloody rags with their heads down and mouths drawn into a thin line — something was wrong, something had gone terribly wrong.

tang bo felt his feet move, walking towards the bedroom where the doors were still shut tightly. he weaved past the attendants trying to hold him back, all telling their young master to go back and wait.

wait? why did he have to wait when he didn't know what was happening to his wife right then? she needed him. and she needed him right now.

the midwife slides the door open just as he was about to open it himself. they both take a step back in surprise.

young master... the lady is alive and well. she is waiting inside.

the older woman bowed and scurried away from the scene to join the others in the courtyard outside.

his wife lay on her back on top of fresh bedsheets and a clean nightgown. she had a sickly pallor, lips were chapped dry with red marks of blood from where the skin ripped open. hair that was riddled with sweat stuck onto the sides of her face, the untied tresses splayed over the top of the bed. her eyes were unfocused and blank, staring straight up at the wall, mind elsewhere. her cheeks were still stained with the remnants of her tears, the evidence of what transpired within these four walls.

wife...

tang bo called out cautiously. she didn't respond, barely even moved an inch to acknowledge his presence.

next to her on the bed was a small swaddle, the stillness of what was supposed to be alive unnerved him. the child's dull skin, probably in some shade of grey, eyes that were never to open, oh.

he sits by her bedside, back facing her. he too, did not know what to say to her at that moment. he was the last person that could have possibly comforted her. well, it was his child too but they were both not lovers so this was an offspring born out of necessity rather than a genuine want. and at this point in his life, tang bo wasn't actually too thrilled about the prospect of fatherhood. not that he would resent that kid, it's just he might not have loved them like he should.

his wife, she's mentioned her anticipation of motherhood but once in a while, he'd catch glimpses of the unreadable expression she had when no one was looking — all while she rubs her growing belly. it made him think that perhaps she wasn't always telling the truth.

once there was a patient who had came to the tang estate to treat the growing tumors in his intestines and since he was a rather important guest, most of the members of the main family, the two of them included, had dropped by to greet him and wish him well for recovery. tang bo could never forget the intensity of her absent gaze at the patient's stomach, her balled fist tightening over her shawl ever so slightly.

perhaps it's good that she's dead.

tang bo feels his eyebrows rise up in shock.

you're not too keen on fathering a child either, are you?

he shakes his head.

well, that makes the two of us. the heavens must be looking out for her, keeping her away from parents like us who can't give her the love she needs.

his wife sighed deeply. her tired face falling to the side to look at him, a lopsided smile making its way onto her lips as if to ease the heavy tension of her words away. she might be right. perhaps, it was better this way. tang bo closes her eyes with his palm, patting her to sleep the way one would with a feverish child.

their daughter would later be the two's first and only child.

═══════════════

SWORDSMAN

the woman wondered how one-sided her husband's relationship with his friend was. the man was a rather expressionless fellow — his sentences were short, curt and straight to the point. her husband didn't seem to mind, with now he was almost always all over that man. ah well, she's just happy tang bo has an actual friend.

rather than worry that he was drunk off his rocker out on the streets past midnight doing who-knows-what in who-knows-where, at least now he's causing trouble with someone she could easily track. apperently, the man was a troublemaker in his own home too.

the first time she met the older sect brother of her husband's friend, they shared a look of silent understanding. ah, so you too have an oversized child to deal with.

watching tang bo come home staggering on his feet together with the man, leaning on the other for support used to riddle her with worry but now she just ushers them both into a spare room prepped with the necessary herbs to concoct a hangover remedy and hope for the best. her husband was a capable man, he would never let himself falter and die in a ditch.

in hindsight, she might have been too confident in his abilities.

the swordsman was the best thing to have happened to her husband. and it was not an exaggeration by any means. not when he looked at his happiest for the first time since she'd known him. even if they were both past their fifties and sixties.

how nice. she thinks to herself whenever she spots them together. to find your other half, your kindred spirit in this word before you died... it must be nice.

she can't find it in her to be bitter. really.

═══════════════

FIRST CHIPPING

if he were to look at what society deemed as a bastard husband, then that requisite would have had his face plastered as a prime example. the type of husband that any aspiring groom should not ever become.

though for those who were in the know, mainly his wife and himself, there was more to their marriage than what everyone saw. it didn't take long for either of them to recognise that this union had been a discreet way for them to hide away from what kids like them were supposed to act like in this rigid society.

they've stuck by each other as the only people who would have understood each other the best. so now that tang bo was finally finding the happiness he should have sought after all this time, he was always feeling the guilt of leaving her behind on her own in that house that had always been too big for just the two of them.

she has yet to utter a word of displeasure to him. that's how she was — the quiet one who kept to herself, letting things happen until the worst had passed over. it was one of the little things he detested about his wife.

he can't bring himself to really hate her. there was a time when he had opened up his heart and confided in her about some things he's been scared to come to terms with. the type of realisation one has from a very early age and has buried deep within themselves to fit into society and the expectations people had of him.

his wife had held onto his hand wordlessly, squeezing it ever so often to assure his nerves. he's never been this vulnerable before. he never thought things like this could be so frightening.

she had something to say too. but not right now. this was his moment, she's not so tactless to take it away. she can't stop thinking that if they'd been more honest earlier, then perhaps they wouldn't have hurt the other unknowingly all these years.

the walls they'd built between them were starting to come down a little — who would have thought they'd find out something new after decades of marriage.

═══════════════

COMING TO TERMS

she couldn't really understand why her husband was loudly crying into her shoulder. her good robes were getting wet from his tears and snot. how did this almost seventy-year-old man have no shred of shame — in front of the attendants no less?

she had given him her blessings earlier today, and he was now free to pursue the swordsman so why was he not going off to sweep his beloved off his feet and ride off into the sunset or whatever those romance novels say?

wife, you know you aren't obligated to be bound to me any more right? if you wish, you are also free to love someone else...

tang bo managed to say between sobs.

...thank you for your consideration.

she hesitated. what did he mean by her being free to love someone else? she can't think of a time when she'd ever felt that kind of emotion, at least not the one that every person around her was chasing after, even back when she was in her youth.

there was always a disconnect whenever the other wives she'd corresponded with ranted and raved about their husband's infidelities or little annoyances. they were always on the verge of hysteria, driven to that point out of love for their husbands they said. and she'd think about how foolish it was.

thank goodness her relationship with tang bo had not been built on a foundation that flimsy. rather, it was one based on mutual respect. which was far better—

ah but. he must have felt trapped in this marriage. not everyone in the world was like her. not everyone had been born with the inability to be like everyone else and it was unfair how they all just instinctively know what romance and lovers-love is. so to have held him back in this loveless situation for this long was a cruel thing.

the good wife, the understanding wife, the kindhearted wife. it's all that she's been the majority of her life. she doesn't know what else there was to her now that she's let-go of these titles. she's free to do what she wants. but what does a caged bird set free know?

she had packed lightly, the clothes on her back were lighter and less showy, the stark opposite of what she used to wear as the daughter-in-law of the tang family. there was not much hesitation as she donned the weimao — it's white veil falling past her knees. she looked at the darkened courtyard of their estate.

she's received enough goodwill in this lifetime. she prayed at the ancestral shrine one last time, asking them to look after everyone now that she's going off.

═══════════════

MORNING AFTER

tang bo awoke to the frantic bustle of the maids outside his room. turns out his wife had gone missing overnight without anyone noticing. he walked out of his room, wandering around the family estate until he reached the main halls where it was quieter. no one was allowed in here outside of events except for the elders and the main family.

he picks up the tattered note that had fluttered to his feet — eyes widening as he takes in the words written on it.

tch, that woman could still pull some tricks at her old age huh. he didn't think she'd still know how to surprise him. the paper was burned away on a candle flame. he wonders if he'd see his wandering wife on his travels with his taoist-hyung. would they all share a drink at the teahouse when they do? oh he hoped so. there's not much things to look forward to at this age, so at least give him some stories and a meal.

ah. he should let his taoist-hyung know about this too. before it slipped out of that old head of his.

[thegengarprincess]

“Dobro jutro,ljubi.” “Dobro jutro,sonček.”

————————————————————————————————

Gene: Pure tooth-rotting *FLUFF*

Summery: Just a glimpse of what a normal lazy morning looks like 4 the husbands ever,except it’s their half-year anniversary N after some reminiscing,Jan decides 2 ask his now boyfriend of half a year if he still remembers the morning after they became official,and boy does Nace remember~

Disclaimer: *All* of this is completely fictional and im not associating this with the real people whatsoever,I just like using these silly lil pretty Balkan men as my Barbie dolls,the moment either of them say their uncomfortable with fanfic im deleting the whole thing,k.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*🐈‍⬛🐕*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* This was it.By now it had been almost a whole year since Martin brought *him* to meet the boys,the man who would replace one of his best friends all so they could keep making music.Jan knew why he had to leave yet it still stung to say goodbye when Martin had been through basically *everything* with the band till now.But what Jan didn’t know back then,no matter how much he believed logic would *always* triumph over love,was that “the new Martin” would end up proving only *sometimes* logic can triumph over love,*especially* when it comes to his now boyfriend and bassist,*Nace Jordan.* Which is how he found himself here,snuggled up in Nace’s bed with an arm wrapped securely yet ever so gently around his slightly smaller frame,Ollie curled up near his legs and snoring just as loudly as a *certain* brunette who had a tendency of reminding him of the small creature sometimes.He slowly awoke to the sound of a familiar yawn which could only come from one person,the one who had been sleeping beside and stayed with him through every rough night for *months* now,and hopefully forever when he can finally afford to go ring shopping,only the best for *his* Nacko afterall and nothing less. Nace tossed onto his side so he could see that perpetually half asleep face he’d come to adore so *so* much,when said face asked him a question along the lines of: “Do you still remember the morning after we became..*this*?” Jan said to him,voice still raspy from sleep ,using his finger to point at himself than Nace. “You mean the morning after we fucked eachother’s brains out in some dingy club bathroom while the rest of the boys were shitfaced drunk N doing god knows what then you told me the first time we saw eachother you forget how to *breath*.” he chuckled which also elected a giggle out of Jan,a sound he would *love* to keep in a jar and listen to on repeat when he has a off day. “Forgetting how 2 breath wasn’t the first thing I did when we met,you know.” “Then what was?” “How to think after I saw ur tattoo sleeve up close for the first time during one of our first gigs together,you had *no* idea what that did to me back then.” slowly tracing along the ink that adorned his boyfriends arm,all away to his shoulder as he planted a kiss on one of the last ink covered patches on the others skin. “Buttt I do now,alot actually.” “How so?” Nace pulled him closer and whispered the answer into his ear,breath ghosting slightly over his lobe,making a small smile tug at his lips. “Cause of all the bite marks and hickeys I always find scattered on them the next morning~” it was Jan’s turn to laugh now when Nace started to place a trail of kisses down his ear.watching the tips go a dark shade of red which always looked good when he was the one wearing it. “Not like you can really blame me tho,tattoos are hot as fuck *especially* when they belong to my extremely sexy and beautiful boyfriend!” he cupped the boyfriends in questions face in his hands and just *admired* him till Nace spoke again. “And who’s that?” Nace questioned as if he didn’t know who he belonged to. “You.” were the only words that came out of Jan’s mouth before he kissed him,slow but it was one of the sweetest kisses he’d ever given,that’s only natural when ur man’s a literal *angel* with the softest lips known to man afterall. Tho it stared off as a innocent “good morning /wake up kiss” which *may* have led to a full on makeout session,both men stayed like that for awhile,only breaking the kiss so they could get some air in their lungs,gently pressing their foreheads together and staring into the others eyes for what could have been an eternity,not like either of them would mind of course. “Dubro jutro,ljubi.” “Dubro jutro,sonček.” And if Jan and Nace from half a year ago knew this is what that faithful day where Martin brought him into the studio to the boys would lead to,maybe getting a new bassist wasn’t the worst idea in the world afterall~ ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*💜❤️*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

(BIG BIG TY 2 ONE OF MY FAVE MOOTS @da-proti-toku-grem 4 ANSWERING MY ASK EARLIER N GETTING MY MOTIVATION 2 WRITE BACK INTO GEAR N HELPING WITH LAST MIN NERVES B4 POSTING!! 🥹🫶🥹🫶🥹🫶🥹🫶🥹🫶 ur truly such.a.f4n.*SWEETHEART* N I hope one day I can be just as good of a writer as U are! I fr always start kicking my feet N twirling my hair when I see U in my inbox,seeing the lil notification with ur user *ALWAYS* makes my day better + U were one of the first blogs i started following N was a huge idol of mine back when I was a lurker!! X33 luv ya Maca ,4 aslong as we have the boys and 4ever <3333333333)

[ctrl-alt-bucky]

If The Winter Soldier was in Task force 141 — Headcannons

(Aka: can somebody teach these dramatic bitches some communication skills)

Be warned, this has a lot more words than I was aiming for (around ~739). Feel free to send me an ask if you want me to expand on certain scenarios, or send a prompt with these two and I might make a oneshot/drabble!

Contains a brief mention of SoapGhost. This version of Bucky is post Endgame. SFW.

♡ Headcannons below the cut ♡

Nicky Fury, the therapist— and most importantly, the government— come to an agreement with the former Winter Soldier: with the Avengers fizzled out, the world needs heroes now more than ever. And so, finding an excuse to use Bucky's highly trained skills, they stick him in with Task 141, hoping the structure and team bonding will help aid his fractured mind, and hopefully dampen his grief in the process.

Ghost isn't keen on a new recruit. He doesn't like extra men to babysit, and he especially doesn't like being unsure of the rookie's capabilities. It doesn't take long for a silent feud to form between him and the newbie, who refers to himself as "Winter" for a call sign or just "Bucky" if he favors you.

Bucky, on the other hand, admires the leadership and protectiveness Ghost shows to his team. But despite that, he's just as cautious of his abilities— and more specifically: where his trust lies, between Bucky, who hasn't entirely yet merged himself with the team, and between the rest of 141, who share a rich history with the Sergeant.

In the first couple missions, Bucky finds himself frustrated with Ghost's orders. He's held the Sergeant title too, once— Hell, climbing the ranks practically required acting on command without any question. That is, until he was able to make his own decisions again. But Bucky had become accustomed to leading himself, or often following behind Steve (who knew more than anybody that telling him what to do didn't guarantee anything), not to mention the mess of Hydra and everything he did to detach himself from that life— So, he struggles with Ghost's authority, and begins to learn very quickly that challenging the non-red, skull-faced fucker is a bad idea.

On one particular morning, just a few days after their last big mission, Bucky wakes up with no arm. Fortunately for him, it's a familiar feeling of emptiness on one side. He later finds it on a shelf in the common room, displayed like a mantelpiece alongside various weapons, with a little skull etched into the bicep with black grease paint. The worst part? Ghost is the first person to sneak past him in decades. Dramatic motherfucker.

After that, Bucky finds a balance of respect and displeasure for Ghost, and works alongside him in unison. The rest of the team doesn't question his sudden change in attitude: some of them, too, had to get over that barrier, after all.

They bond over a share of books. Bucky spent a lot of his downtime before and after the army reading, and likewise with Ghost. Bucky owned a first edition of The Hobbit before he became a pawn for the Soviets, and Ghost is secretly jealous of it, having lost himself in fictional stories all the time growing up.

They also bond over their shared magnet for idiots. Specifically, idiot teammates with a tendency for causing trouble. Bucky ribs him for not making any moves on Soap, whereas Ghost defends himself with a quiet grunt and often changes the subject to something else.

The biggest thing they oppose on, however, is the subject of masks. Ghost is never seen without his, but Bucky almost never has it on unless they're on a mission, and even then, he occasionally opts out, mostly to blend in when necessary (and to help keep his memories at bay, not that he'd ever say it).

Typically, their favorite past time is sparring. Bucky has never found a non-human that can almost match him strength for strength, and Ghost likes knowing he can throw his all at Bucky without having to worry about the damage it could cause. It's the best training for the both of them; allowing their energy to drain, their skills to improve, and their banter to escalate until one of them is on top of the other, holding them down until a forfeit is called.

More than once, Bucky has been the one on the ground with his arms pinned. He claims he only admitted defeat to, "boost Ghost's ego so the miserable bastard can smile for once," but they both know it's not quite the truth.

They work as a good team and even better rivals. And though Bucky would never admit it out loud, after everything he's lost, he enjoys having an equal again. And Ghost, well... Ghost wouldn't mind keeping him around for a while, that's for sure.

That's all I've got for now! I have a NSFW headcannons draft for these two soldiers' x reader. Lemme know if that's something I should post ;D

[justanie]

I want to clarify, this was not done to respond to a recent post. It's a thought I've always had in the Fandom and no matter how popular the image is, there are fans who don't seem to take it into consideration...because of the HCs of a certain song that dominates the Fandom because of how Gakupo and Luka should "always" be portrayed..

.

.

.

If you have known me for a long time, I think you will notice what my thoughts is like with the GakuLuka ship. When I entered the Vocaloid Fandom and discovered this ship, I didn't think it would become one of my favorite couples in fiction, even if it's just two banks of software programmed to sing (or speak in the case of a Talkloid). I love the characteristics that combine these two, the color palette, the magnificent duo of their voices together and the designs easily suggest a love between historical figures (Gakupo a Samurai, Luka a Damsel). But something has caught my attention is which gave birth to this ship and made a certain dynamic between them seen as a couple endure for a long time to such a degree that thanks to the fact that today it is no longer executed in a large part of the recent Headcanons due to its controversial and scandalous what is it.

Go Google It (ググれカス/Ggrks) is an original Vocaloid song. Created by A-minP on February 18, 2009, this song is about how Gackpo is madly in love with Luka, the girl he met through chat, but she treats him with indifference and tries to ignore him, giving him answers to everything he asks 'Go Google It', in the end Luka admits her feelings towards Gackpo, not knowing that he was listening to her and she denies saying anything about him. How it looks in the description is the typical "love story" of how to conquer a Tsundere, which from the beginning of the description makes me think, why would Luka accept Gakupo in the chat if in real life she treated him like shit?? I know I don't have to give so much background to this part but that's what starts my talk about why this song shouldn't be taken seriously as a romantic song and interpreted as such in case of romanticizing a relationship like that.

.

Starting with the first verse, we are told how Gakupo meets Luka for the first time in person, and what is the first thing he does? He tells her that he loves her...yes...not even a day goes by and he already admits his feelings, then there is Luka, although I have heard that she is a "mature" looking Vocaloid in the Cryptonloids instead of trying to deal with the situation of the topic and be a little more understanding that it is the "first time they interact" she just rejects him and asks him to leave her alone, then we move on to the iconic phrase of "Go Google It, idiot" followed by questions that Gakupo asks her and they are about things like what her email is, where she lives, what kind of men she likes, what she thinks of him, if she eats eggplants, if we ignore the first tree you can see that it was something harmless...The second time he asks her random questions it's already something to worry about, as Gakupo asks Luka about the color of her underwear or what she's wearing (no, I didn't reject him, I'd call the police if Someone in real life asks me that). While the rest of the song is about Gakupo conquering Luka and her rejecting him either physically with blows and insults or using objects that remind her of him to continue torturing him if he is not present (making me think, is Luka really the victim? Because Although I don't condone what Gakupo does, Luka isn't saved from being a saint either) and then we have the end of the song with Luka admitting that she fell in love with him, it is not known with exact science what caused this change, but Just as she admits it and Gakupo finds out, she continues to denigrate him until she reaches the mythical fork scene (I'll just ask, you tell me that a woman, canonically, 20 years old, who the entire Fandom approves of being someone "mature", acts like a snotty and rude girl, and still approve of this "being an act of maturity"?) From here the song concludes.

.

Now, according to what I learned from my friends, this song was not made to promote a loving message but rather as a song "to make you laugh" (other examples of this type of song would be Magical Neko Len-Len and Owata!). But before I let it go, I ask again: Would you really be laughing or looking tenderly at the image of a toxic couple that is based on the perversion of men and Dom abuse by women? Before talking more about this, I would get to the point of how this song achieved its content of giving birth to the GakuLuka ship and I can only say that the vast majority of fans around the last decade (and few in recent times) approved this like "Oh but what a funny couple" "Without this song they would be nothing together" "Gakupo and Luka are so mature and cute in this relationship" (Oh yes, yes mature means being a mental pervert with a woman you know for first time and she acts like a 13-year-old girl when she gets angry, I think it's possible) and from here came countless stories (Fanfics and Doujinshis) and FanArts based on the image of Go Google It with the interpretation of the fans for being "A love song" by Gakupo and Luka, although it is not bad that in the fanfics they could develop their relationship better and that the FanArts only attribute to honor it like a large part of the Vocaloid songs. It would have been a little more tolerable if at that time the fans had recognized that no matter where you looked, Go Google It did not encourage a healthy relationship, and from this, speaking in general of Fanfics, they came out with the typical story that Luka is not like other girls and who does not believe in romance but has to succeed in school, and Gakupo was so flat and without personality that the only thing that stood out were his scenes with Luka or being rejected by her, until a miracle happens and they fall in love...but this does not mean that even if Luka accepts a courtship with him, she will continue to see herself as the same girl who denigrates him behind his back and even becomes jealous when she sees other girls flirting with Gakupo.

I know that at this point you will tell me "They are fictional characters and the story of the song does not affect real life" but indirectly from before and even today...there are still these types of things...It could easily be interpreted when a boyfriend (and worse in cases, a complete stranger) is looking only for the physique in his partner, although both are interpreted as 20-year-old characters, there are men who, without having an age difference, only look for that in the women, sex and perception. Many here also interpret Luka as a victim who is harassed, but if that were the case, I wouldn't believe this if, apart from acting immature, she spends her time abusing Gakupo both physically and psychologically, even if most of the stories put it this way like a normal boy who is interested in Luka in a healthy way and she doesn't reciprocate like that. I also cannot accept that they continue to believe that this image is beautiful because Go Google It brings them "Nostalgia", that is not an excuse to indicate that it is a song with a good message.

Something that relieves me is that today in the Fandom this case is no longer seen as relevant as before, except for a few as I mentioned before, and a large part of the GakuLuka community matured and knew that the two of them deserve a dynamics and new stories to be able to save this ship from a low reputation that it had for NoGakuLuka fans. Some are even going to adapt the concept of Go Google It but better developed without having to add both as perverts and toxic in the relationship or alone is left to give a FanArt.

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I make this opinion since I personally kept it to myself and could only share it with friends. If you are new to the community and it is your first time listening to it (or you already knew about it) give yourself a moment to think about whether what you like is something other than just the toxic relationship between the GakuLuka of this song or that Go Google It captive by memories of your childhood/adolescence, there are other very beautiful songs by them that, although much of their relationship is applied as a tragic love story (as seen in Witch), lead to something better developed as it should have to see this ship without necessarily being guided by Go Google It, which has aged badly for its message by leagues, as being the first thing that started the ship, it is not a story that would be considered to give a funny story or a romantic love.

[jakowskis]

💖💙💜 owen harper bisexuality masterpost 💖💙💜

i've had this in my drafts for a minute but i figured i'd finish it up and post it today for bisexual visibility day :D

it hasn't cropped up recently, but i've seen a lot of people who've questioned owen's bisexuality over the years and i thought i'd compile all the 'evidence' (although it completely baffles me that we got a show with five canonical bisexual characters and people want to write two of them off as straight / "heterflexible" ?? there shouldn't have to be 'proof' of owen being bi, RTD said torchwood is about five bisexuals fighting aliens in cardiff which means they're all bi, full stop. also, bisexuals should never have to 'prove' they're bi, and in regards to fictional characters, i'm sick of people nit-picking who 'deserves' to be counted as rep and refusing to 'claim' certain characters if they're morally grey or if the fandom simply doesn't Like them as much-)

but i digress.

so without further ado, here's everything i've found that supports owen's status as a bicon :-)

explicit canon instances

➤➤ obviously, we have to start with his gay kiss in the first episode of the show. there's a lot to be said about that kiss, i'm not gonna get into all that here, but i've seen a lot of people say it's not proof of owen being attracted to men, and i wholeheartedly disagree. you can literally catch him smiling very happily after the kiss (and one of owen's few genuine smiles of the series, too). i don't think a straight man (or even a "heteroflexible" man) would beam at another guy who's just informed him that he wants to fuck him. a fair amount of people have also said they interpreted owen calling the taxi as him intending to get away from the couple, but i don't understand how they're getting that impression, because that smile makes it seem very much apparent to me that running away is the last thing he wants to do.

it's also, notably, the first time we see bisexuality IN the bisexual show, which i don't think should be discounted. like, we see owen do something gay before jack does, for fuck's sake. is it a good first impression of how torchwood portrays bisexuality? no. is setting owen up as a more sex-driven, opportunistic bisexual nicely contrasted against ianto & tosh's more romance-oriented brand of demisexual bi/pansexuality? in my opinion, yes. i love that the torchwood bisexuals all practice their bisexuality in different ways. that's very special to me. 'cause it's realistic! real bisexuals all experience bisexuality differently! obviously it'd be a different story if he was the only bi rep, because lord knows we've seen enough of that already, but torchwood makes an effort to show us five different brands of bisexuality, and five different bi stories that largely only exist in the subtext, that aren't the focus of the show, and it's fantastic. it's all i could ever want out of bi rep, honestly, even if it is a bit dated now.

➤➤ the other explicit moment in the show: asking tosh and ianto for an end-of-the-world threesome in sleeper (s2ep2). i've actually never seen owen bi-deniers (fhdskjf it's a conspiracy) even mention this scene. owen literally asks ianto if they can have sex with each other to his face, and he's dead serious when he asks it. that's... i mean you can't mistake that as anything else. like fhdsjkf??

➤➤ next we jump to some of the, i suppose, extended universe content. whether the books are canon or not is debated, but the novel 'another life' features owen playing an online simulation game, and it makes a point to depict owen flirting with someone with a male avatar + wondering to himself if the guy would be down for cyber-sex. [someone posted part of that scene here. for context, owen's also got a VR headset on during that bit.]

➤➤ another instance is on the website, which some also don't regard as canon, but, i mean, i don't know who worked on the things we see on that site, but obviously they got their information from somewhere. they probably consulted with the writers on the show, or at the very least got notes on what things to touch on. anyway, there's a portion of the site where you can find a 'background check' on owen, and it's just a collection of messages from some ex-lovers of his. one of them is a man.

again, some people disregard the canon validity of the website, but the way i see it, the information on this site was released while the show was airing for fans to look at and to gain further insight on the characters. one of the things they felt a need to tell us about owen, important enough to be featured in his background (wayyy before the katie plot was developed), was that he wasn't just interested in women. personally, i regard that as canon. you can find this here. and even if you wanna say fragments jossed this background, it doesn't joss his, like... identity.

next we have things said by russell t. davies himself + by burn gorman (owen's actor)

➤➤ again, RTD (who's torchwood's creator, but i'm assuming everyone reading this knows that) explicitly described torchwood as "a bunch of bisexuals living under cardiff and fighting aliens". that's not ambiguous. [i don't have a direct source for this quote, it was apparently said on the dvd extras.]

burn's comments on owen's sexuality include...

➤➤ (when asked who owen fancies) "Owen's pretty cocky, he'll try it on with whoever comes along." [x] and yes, this is vague, but vagueness is often interpreted as proof of bisexuality. (for example, in the pacific rim dvd features, newt's bio stating he was interested in "whoever will take him" was widely interpreted by the fandom as him being bi.)

➤➤ (in regards to owen's "let's all have sex" line) "I don't think he [...] thinks about the implications, or whether it's with a man or a woman." [x]

(ok i have to admit, although i absolutely adore burn, i'm not super fond of the way his 2006-08 self would talk about how torchwood handled sexuality*. however! he kind of hit the nail on the head in saying that, even if it's in the context of owen wanting end-of-the-world sex, because my take on how owen sees his own sexuality has always essentially boiled down to thinking he'd be like, "well, why wouldn't men also be an option?" (well, with sexual attraction anyway; i think owen's relationship with romantic attraction is far more complex.) i think he resembles jack in that way; anyone's a prospective sexual partner, if they're attractive and interesting and he decides he wants them, and he's also impulsive as hell, so he doesn't think too hard about gender in the moment if he decides he's into someone. there's not really any hang-ups.)

➤➤ and ofc...

(out of context this could look like he's just jokingly calling owen an alien-fucker, although owen makes his thoughts on alien-fucking pretty clear in countrycide lol, but it was said in the context of owen/andy as a ship [x].)

*if you're wondering what i'm referring to, it's a comment here [x] about how the torchwood team's bisexuality is a result of being in a pressure cooker environment and having a 'wartime mentality', and they just kind of 'take what they can get'. the implication that bisexuality is out of desperation/accessibility rather than attraction is pretty damn icky, BUT i love him lots and he generally seems to be pretty woke these days (+ otherwise has always seemed to grasp why torchwood's rep was so unique and groundbreaking and important) so i'll go ahead and hope that was just, y'know, simple 'being a straight guy in 2008' ignorance. fifteen years is a long time and i have faith his opinions have evolved by now, esp considering he used the word 'pansexual' at a 2016 con [x]. (actually, ok, you caught me, that last bit wasn't super relevant and i didn't need to bring it up, but i just wanted to gush about him doing it because how often do you hear that word out of celebs, especially older and presumably straight ones. and in 2016, too. kinda slay of him, ngl)

aaand finally, some random, non-explicit little things that i think support him being a bisexy king (several of these are goofy and half-serious)

➤➤ in episode 2, they make a point to cut to owen smiling after jack's line about "you people and your quaint little labels". one might argue he's smiling at gwen & carys on the screen, but cutting to him immediately after jack says it very much implies he's reacting to jack's words, and i think it's particularly poignant after, again, we saw him kiss a man the episode prior. (which, another thing - owen's literal introduction features him kissing a man, like that's gotta count for something. if the literal third thing i ever see a male character do ever is kiss a guy, that means something.)

➤➤ and of course, in the same episode, we get "period military is not the dress code of a straight man" .... owen's the only one of them with working gaydar. also what a fruity thing to say

➤➤ speaking of fruity things to say, in s2e10 when they're all watching the old film, owen goes "look at the state of them 💅" and he says it SO cunty for no reason it always kills me fhsdkjfd

➤➤ combat.

➤➤ no, really.

➤➤ bonus: in the combat commentary, it's mentioned that when RTD saw the above scene between mark & owen, he said it was "the gayest thing he'd ever seen".

➤➤ in the three monkeys, a big finish audio featuring owen & andy, owen flirts with andy repeatedly. even if he just does it to be annoying, it's still pretty damn gay. also the pet names... (he calls him sweetheart, sunshine, and tiger. it's half-mocking, sure, especially because it's owen, but there's also a domesticity to it.)

➤➤ and then there's the hope's "you're alive again and you want crisps?!" "be glad that's all i'm asking for" (owen was like 'i will not use this as an excuse to try to sleep w andy i will not use this as an excuse to try to sleep w andy i will not use th') these are the only two audios i've heard with this duo, i'm sure there's more examples in the other two. i know gooseberry literally has owen sabotaging andy's relationship with his gf and that is... woohoohoo.... i'll update this once i get through those.

➤➤ …. this is my personal opinion but i lowkey think he kinda wants john hart a bit when they all first meet him in kkbb hdskjfds. gwen & tosh both seem very charmed by him and they're meant to, it's supposed to be like 'oh, look at jack's ex waltzing in and charming the pants off everyone (ha), and only ianto and jack see through him' - owen isn't given a flirty line of dialogue or even a close-up shot of him eyeing john like the girls get, but if you watch him closely he certainly looks… intrigued by him. i think owen's more of a bi disaster than he lets on.

➤➤ in episode 10, diane notes that owen has "beauty products" in his bathroom. obviously this shouldn't be indicative of sexuality, but how many Straight Men in 2006 were moisturizing lmao. hell, how many do nowadays 😭

➤➤ gwen & owen's dynamic settles into a lovely little friendship in s2 and owen lowkey gives gbf vibes <3 them making fun of the movie in s2e10 together + the cheek-kissing at the end of s2e9… bi besties!!

➤➤ the peace sign he throws up in meat when he meets rhys fdsjk i don't even believe in some of the silly internet jokes abt bi culture but c'mon

➤➤ have you seen his taste in women. diane is soo butch and gwen's a total tomboy in s1. that's bi culture babey!!!! i too like girls when they're boys

➤➤ i already talked about it but the aforementioned scene where he asks tosh and ianto for a threesome... he asks them, like, immediately after they team up and bully him for not comprehending that there's "no phones. phones all broken. anyone there? no, 'cause the phones aren't working." that was suuuch a disaster bi owen moment for me. i too would get a little revved up if tosh and ianto both bullied me at once <3

aaand finally... the biggest Evidence of all....

➤➤ he's a leather jacket bisexual. need i say more

and that's all! thanks for reading!

[credit for the dividers used in this. didn't tumblr used to have built-in dividers? i miss that.]

[killuintense]

Hi mootsss!

I just finished reading Nic's post about the new issues of prompts in fics, things about stepcest, incest directly, noncon or even pedophilia.

I wanted to do something further removed from their post because, first, I want to be able to explain myself well and be able to give the attention that talking about these topics deserves. And secondly, because I would like to be able to speak, as I am the one who has made a series directly from Leon Stepdad, which would also leave the way open for someone who writes about it to explain why the attraction to this type of content.

I'm only going to talk about stepcest because I don't read noncon or anything related to rape, or pedophilia because although I read and write about everything, issues related to minors under 18 years of age are NOT allowed on this profile.

To begin with, I am not a strictly moral person, and on top of that I have a certain morbidity and curiosity about many topics. I've always been into daddy kink since I was a teenager, but I never really liked it. Very crazy because I love stepcest, and this is precisely because I know it's not real. The dynamics that are mixed when writing nsfw and the question of secrecy, of 'they won't find out' and the fact that it is all hidden and taboo makes it more adrenaline-inducing. Then I would talk about the intensity of love and protection that, this does have to do with traumas and mechanisms of draining everything murky that we have experienced in a healthier way (so to speak). I have a bad relationship with my father, and with all the men in my life, so wanting a real man to love me and take care of me is mixed, but at the same time it is mixed with my bad concept of fatherly love.

Precisely for this reason in my stepcest series I try to mention not only the sexual but also what goes beyond it. Leon is my current hyperfixation so I simply channel everything I feel into him, plus I really like his adult version and he gives me comfort in my "trauma", the way he cares for the women around him, or the way you think of him and see him as a single father jsdjksdl. I mean, it's not for nothing that there are so many fics about Leon and baby fever or breeding, because he gives off exactly all those vibes. Now just take a traumatized girl who wants her father to love her and boom, you have my stories or many more about stepdad.

All this leads to my bad perception about what love is, mixed with what I already told you before. I love stepcest! But I wouldn't mess with my stepfather or stepbrother, and if Leon were real he probably wouldn't be with his stepdaughter either, so we understand that it's just fiction but it's okay to talk about it. It would be more worrying if he came here to say "actually I think it's okay to have relationships with family members, etc." so it's perfect to clarify the issues and stop being taboo, we all have different ways of talking about what we feel and Tumblr doesn't stop to be a place where we can talk about what we feel and make it our safe place.

Finally I want to say that even in my free will I don't like reading fics where they characterize Leon badly, you know, all that shit about making him bad and cold???? frightening. So my goal is also to be able to write it well, make it questionable but still have the essence of Leon, obviously.

ily'all, see you later!!

[muffinpink02]

Hi, sorry if this is a bit of a weird, rambly or hard question to answer. I ask you as you're one of the writers I've been reading the longest and I have the absolute uttermost respect for, but please feel free to ignore it if you don't feel like answering.

I'm Autistic and Woso is my special interest, particularly the WSL. I used to write a bit of woso fic, but I copped a bit of hate on here for it so I took it all down. I considered perhaps posting on AO3 instead, but recently I've seen a lot of chatter about woso fic could be considered abusive to players, even just silly fluffy stuff, and now I feel all kinds of morally confused. I really enjoy reading lots of fics, and now I'm starting to feel like a bad person for doing so.

I really, really enjoy watching women's football, but if I'm being completely honest, I do enjoy watching certain players more now that I'm invested in various made-up stories about them. I would never, ever parlay that into any real-life situation or scenario, and I never talk to anyone in my real life about anything fan-fic related because I know that's taboo too. I lead a pretty lonely life, and this little community brings me a bit of joy, but I would hate to think that in doing so I'm being abusive to the very players I admire and respect so much?

Do you think fan-fic is or can be abusive to players? Is this something you've ever struggled with when writing or reading fic?

Thank you in advance xo

Hey! Okay, firstly I’m sorry that faceless bullies have managed to get in your head and make you stop doing something you enjoy doing.

I’ll just say this. Fuck them. These people genuinely have nothing better to do. I don’t know if it’s where I’m a bit older but fanfic has been going on for YEARS! I wouldn’t be surprised if you had people doing it in the early 80s on ‘Star Trek’ or whatever show was big back then. We’re not the first and we won’t be the last.

I completely get it, these are real people, and I definitely have had my doubts at the start, but also I know this is fiction, everything myself and others write is completely made up. The thing is once you get in the public eye you get fans in all shapes and sizes. If that’s fanfic, fan art, tiktok edits, or people that go to games and scream in the players faces. Or fans who only lift their head up to take a picture of a footballer, then go back on their phone for the rest of the match (I’ve seen that A LOT)

It’s a corner of the internet where people like to read stories wherever it be fluff, smut, angst and so on. It’s just a break from reality. It’s not that deep!

I don’t know if it’s because the woso’s fan base are quite young, that think they have some special bond with the footballers or think they should ‘protect them’ they probably shouldn’t be reading anything that’s 18 and above.

Don’t let these people put you down, because at the end of the day who the fuck are they? Do they pay your bills? No. These people aren’t worth your time or head space. They are irrelevant.

Also to your abusive question. No. I think it’s more abusive on spaces like Twitter and L chat. Some of the things I’ve seen written about players and their friends/ family are frankly disgusting. Also stalkers? That’s abuse.

I wonder if the writers who write about the men footballers get the same energy?

I think the footballers have a lot more to worry about then me or you writing up a fictional story about them. Who knows, maybe they read it? 🤸

Put your stories back up. Fuck those anons. Do what makes you happy!

[the-writing-moon]

so i work in a well-known library, right, as a part-timer, and it's been great working with the books, they're real friendly and everything. but this is a very exclusive library, right, you have to send in an application and maybe get interviewed to get in because we're dealing with really old archival material here; i've had to dust crumbled paper off of desks and some of the spines of these hundreds-of-years-old books have been replaced with electric tape with their titles rewritten with wite-out from how much the spines have fallen out. i look up and see dead white men glaring down at me from murals and paintings and busts from the ceiling, probably aghast and wondering how a fucking little island girl is handing their precious books and poking at their dutch-painted glass windows with her grimy brown fingers. this is just set-dressing, so you really know where i'm coming from.

anyways, you know those memes that go around writing communities? doesn't matter if you write fics or manuscripts, we've all seen them, liked them, reblogged them.

"writing a slash fic instead of writing i've been googling what jewelry young german women wore in the 1700s"

"i'm pretty sure i'm on the fbi and interpol hitlists because of my search history"

"story prompt: overly helpful serial killer sweetheart x clueless crime fiction writer"

"when you don't know long division but you can talk about the taxation laws in victorian england because you needed to find out how taxes work to make your story believable"

they're memes that make you chuckle, guffaw, and nod because they're relatable! everyone hates the idea of being corrected by a random poindexter who can call you out on your bullshit on victorian tax laws, you uncultured fool, or who happens to know how blood sprays look if you shoot a person a certain way, you gormless coward, not because they were shooting the gun but they were part of the forensics team, pinky promise, i wasn't there on the 15th of november. and it's a bit absurd. like, who exactly knows - or cares - about victorian tax laws? does it really matter to write about reality in all its facets into fiction? majority of your readers probably aren't vampires or other extant immortals so does it really matter if you don't hold history up as accurately as possible in your 30k friends-to-enemies-to-lovers dark academia yuri slashfic? does historical accuracy matter when you're writing about samurais in the heian period in modern english with modern sensibilities? who would even know what stuff was really like back then? some things aren't googlable, and you can't always trust google anyways.

i don't know the answer to all these questions. but i know the answer to one.

so, back to the library.

one day, i'm shelving history books one after the other, listening to an audiobook from a public library using a library card of which i faked my address for me to use. reparations. and way more ethical than piracy in my eyes. support authors, patronize libraries, and all that. when i shelve books, i like to wonder about who reads them and why. what research they're doing. what they're doing here. whether they know how lucky they are. i envy this library where i work. i envy the people who live in this town. i envy the readers. they have all of this because someone recognized the value of hoarding, the value of taking and tabulating and preserving. one could argue it's the colonial way. but enough of that, i'm shelving books, books that i sometimes wonder at, because i never could have imagined so many books on so many topics, and sometimes they are topics that are so trivial and-

and i'm holding, in my hands, a book about the jewelry young german women wore in the 1700s.

being in a university town, you come to understand that academics have their pet projects; the drive to understand the minutiae of their field, of humanity, of nature. think of a topic and there's probably a dissertation for that. you also understand there is a lot of publishing politics, that researchers' papers are paywalled behind exorbitant fees for which they receive no royalties from. you also understand that academia can also be elitist, even when the people inside it call for open access.

to other people, i'm sure i sound incoherent and raving. but i'm sure that there are people out there who understood why i took several moments staring at this book, recalling all those fucking memes about historical accuracy, of people joking that they're looking for things even the internet has no answer for. because the answers do exist. someone's written about them. someone took the time to look at and tabulate and write about german jewelry. someone else, tax laws. some other person, blood sprays, either through study or applied experimentation. the knowledge is out there. they just aren't available to you.

[that-gay-jedi]

You know, I really want more used-sounding voices in music in general, women especially bc there's definitely an element of misogyny, but like even when you look at what mostly passes for aged/smokey voices in men it's mostly just either basses who people think don't sound "youthful" because we stereotypically associate tenors with sounding fresh and young, or vocalists in genres with either growling or a lot of chest voice etc that sound just like every other singer if/when they do a song where it's relevant.

And like, I could bore you with all the anatomical details of what makes your voice either sound for lack of better terms "new" vs "used", but that's not really the point.

And sure there's a kind of self-selecting process that goes on because people whose livelihood rests on their voice are more likely to take care of their voices and can maintain their initial sound for decades if they're both lucky and really dilligent, and because successful musicians have money to pay for ways to reduce the rigours of touring and whatnot on vocal health that less popular ones I may not have heard of don't have etc etc, BUT.

Good vocalists whose voices have been noticeably altered by previous workplace/environmental factors or by cumulative years of lifestyle choices or by the ravages of TIME to which none of us are ultimately immune can bring a sense of like vulnerability/rawness/realism/rugged endurance to their performance that a mint condition voice just absolutely cannot match, and there's such an utter lack of it available both locally and commercially we're severely missing out.

This goes across genres and way beyond any question of what's "authentic" by the way. I don't require every song about striking coal miners so come from people who sound like they've worked 20+ years in the mines themselves, and in fact there's a power and beauty in the idea of someone with a relatively pampered voice who's seen entirely different kinds of hardship putting their pipes behind the words of those who struggled before. But you reach a certain age where, metaphorically, the knight in scratched and dented armour is more romantic to you than the shiny one, and yet for all the glut of music we have about romance there are not nearly enough love songs that "get" me (or they may lyrically but only lyrically) now I've reached that age- as just one example.

AND like. Singing is an art that requires a tonne of knowledge and work. Even people with the most naturally beautiful voices don't just wake up one morning knowing exactly how to breathe for which notes nor having the impressive lung capacity many genres prize nor knowing how to read music (or parse music by ear) etc etc etc. Which means there is something so powerful and aching and HUMAN about someone who can hear that their own voice doesn't sound like it could've if their life had been different or like it did when they were younger etc etc still putting in the immense amount study and practice to learn to use the voice they DO have. It adds delicious texture and depth to everything they sing.

Likewise, if someone already has put all that time and energy in and then something alters their voice AND THEY RELEARN/ADAPT AND KEEP SINGING, think about what that puts into everything they sing thereafter.

It's why we love fictional characters who grow beyond deep trauma or have prominent physical scars or who start off their story as a jaded antihero etc etc etc. The essence of what it is to be human is to live with loss and imperfection and still work toward your human desires to be heard, to create, to do, to learn. It's surviving hardship and being changed by time and experience but still reaching out and grasping the fact that YOUR ARE ALIVE with both hands. To not be able to go back to a past that no longer exists, to never again be the same person you were before X or Y thing and yet YOU ARE STILL HERE and deciding that FOR AS LONG AS YOU'RE STILL HERE YOU WILL NOT BE SILENCED.

[ceterisparibus116]

Law question!

Is "what counts as reasonable" (as in how a reasonable person would act/reasonable doubt etc.) something that people in the legal world have different opinions how to interpreter? And could those disagreements lead to a case going to court instead of being solved without needing to go to court?

I just found it fascinating that a lot of things (right?) seem to depend on the reasonability of it. Which do makes sense that such a sentence needs to be there, but also doesn't it make the law - a very objective-presented thing - a bit open to... subjectivity?? But it's also really good because you do need to consider the circumstanses and context of things when rulings are done. Right?

I know nothing about law, but the implications of reasonabilty fascinates me and I want to know more!

(Also, I may or may not have started to ponder it because I tried to write a scene where Matt and Foggy is sleepdeprivied and studying for finals and I wanted them to talk about something law-adjacent...)

THIS IS MY FAVORITE ASK EVER BECAUSE YEAH.

Law is all "we're so smart and everything is defined and our arguments are so precise" and then "but what is a reasonable person?" absolutely smacks you in the face.

So the "reasonable person" standard (RPS) (which, fun fact, used to be the "reasonable man" standard and I'm thankful we've moved beyond that) is considered an objective standard, meaning that it doesn't matter if any specific person thinks or feels a certain way, based on their unique knowledge, feelings, experiences, etc. (that would be subjective). This mythical "reasonable person" who supposedly represents all of us is recognized to be a "legal fiction" (which is where, for legal purposes, we act like something is true even when we know it's probably not true).

This objective fact is one that must be determined by a fact-finder: aka a jury (unless a person waives their right to a jury trial, in which case the judge will be the sole fact-finder). So in reality, the "reasonable person" is whatever a jury of 6-12 think.

And yes, cases will absolutely go to court just because each side believes that the RPS will turn in their favor.

For example, the crime of stalking, in my state, has objective and subjective elements. The subjective element is that the victim feels alarm or annoyance. The objective element is that a "reasonable person" in the victim's situation would also feel alarm and annoyance.

So if a stalking case went to trial, the victim could take the stand and testify for hours about how truly alarmed or annoyed they felt, and maybe the jury would even believe: "Yep, this person was definitely alarmed/annoyed."

However, that's not enough for a conviction - the jury also has to believe, "A reasonable person who experienced what the victim experienced would also be alarmed/annoyed."

So the prosecution will argue to the jury why a reasonable person (read: the jury) would definitely feel alarmed/annoyed in those circumstances, whereas the defense will argue that...well...you can imagine how ugly those arguments can get, essentially saying that the victim is lying or crazy or overly emotional, etc.

All this raises some serious questions. What if the defendant is a male, and the victim is a female? Would a jury of women be more likely to imagine that a reasonable person would feel alarm from a male stalking them, yet perhaps men would feel that a reasonable person would not be alarmed by another man stalking them? We deliberately moved away from the "reasonable man" standard, but in cases like this, should the jury actually be instructed to ask, "What would a reasonable woman feel in this situation?"

(If you want to see a fascinating yet unofficial illustration of this, watch this youtuber's reaction to the movie Hush, and then read the older comments or watch his response video which highlights some of those comments. Admittedly, part of the youtuber's reaction is colored by him viewing the situation as purely fictional, but he also acknowledged that the movie failed to properly situate him in the protagonist's situation - in other words, the movie failed to help him see the objective reasonableness of the protagonist's subjective feelings and reactions.)

You can imagine other areas where this is discussed. Should the jury be asked in cases involving children about what a "reasonable person" would do, or what a "reasonable child" would do? Or in cases involving a Black defendant and police, should a jury ask what a "reasonable person" would feel or do in that situation, or should the jury ask what a "reasonable Black person" would feel or do in that situation? What if the jury in this case is all white?

And where do we stop? What traits are relevant or not? Even if we can all agree that gender and race should be factors in the RPS, should we also consider sexuality? Should we always consider sexuality, or only in certain cases? Should we consider religion? Should we consider mental illness? Should we consider everything a person might include in their tumblr bio?

And arguably, if you take that too far, you end up with a bunch of laws that are almost impossibly vague to interpret. Like, if I want to send a person a couple of notes, do I need to know all the possible traits of my would-be victim (their age, their race, their gender, their sexuality, their religion, their mental illnesses, etc.) to determine the likelihood that a reasonable person in their shoes would consider my behavior to be stalking?

Additionally, you risk opening the door to some scary prejudice. Like, if a hypothetical person is 18 years old, Black, trans, female, gay, and autistic...would the standard applied to her be different from a person who is 26, white, cis, male, straight, and neurotypical? Would these different standards really make things more fair? How would you safeguard against prejudice?

It gets very sticky. This is one (of many) reasons why I prefer criminal law. See, the RPS does pop up in criminal law, usually with crimes like assault and stalking; also with certain defenses, like self-defense, which requires that a defendant's actions in self-defense were objectively reasonable. However, most criminal charges don't involve the RPS.

For example: did you operate a motor vehicle? Were you intoxicated? Okay, you committed a DUI, case closed - the jury doesn't have to worry about reasonableness at all.

Anyway, the short answer is: you're absolutely right and you've hit on one of law's dirty secrets that, if scrutinized too closely, causes a lot of dominos start to fall. It's very fascinating, especially as we as society become increasingly aware of intersectionality and the ways that subjective experiences correlated with group identity (like race, gender, sexuality, religion, etc.) can influence a person's view of what is objective.

And yes, Matt and Foggy would absolutely debate this incessantly, either as part of their studies or to procrastinate from studying, and if you do in fact write this, please tag me in it so I can read it!

[b-blushes]

tag someone you want to get to know better

tagged by @woobifiedvillain thank you heehee!

Favourite color: gonna have to say green because my walls and my blankets and my t-shirts and my travel mug etc etc etc are that colour :P but i am also feeling orangey yellow atm!

Last song: Ready or Not by Cravity

Last movie: I too very rarely watch movies. It was probably another rewatch of 'a silent voice' and normally as soon as i finish rewatching that movie i immediately watch it again (but i watch everything in chunks across multiple days anyway :P)

Currently watching: Backflip (high school anime about men's rhythmic gymnastics)(PLEASE everyone recommend me sports anime i love them <3) and also Destined with you (k-drama, haven't really gotten Invested™ in this one but i just wasn't sure what drama to watch so i'm sticking with it)(also please feel free to recommend me k- or c-dramas i love love stories + cannot do anything super scary/thriller/violent) and also 'Handmade: Britain's Best Woodworker' it only just started and it's a weekly show and it's the first time i've watched it (i think there's 3 seasons on channel 4?) but they are making things out of wood (something i wish to be doing) 👍 (I watch certain things at certain designated breaks in the day (normal guy hours) hence multiple shows at one time) OH ALSO i am watching an old episode of going seventeen each week it is my mood booster <3

Currently reading: re-reading fangirl by rainbow rowell for the one millionth time - it's my comfort book and is midway through my rainbow rowell re-reads I wanna get back on my non-fiction kick but going through a 'nothing tastes good' period where i'm struggling to get into any books (fiction or non-fictions or shows also!)

Currently listening: <- question added to the template by Ev (great choice) Dungeons and Daddies podcast 👍 plus my september playlist plus Just Do It by BSS <3

Currently working on: making my christmas gifts, making a christmas card design, slowly sorting things out for a room renovation, a notebook planner design. all of these are taking literally months we are working on disability time ✌️

Current obsession: no thoughts head empty sorry i am DESPERATELY wanting to be obsessed with something but the circumstances you know. nonetheless we persevere :P

Tagging (no pressure): @vegpatch @hierophant-mean @ghost-shepherdess @goody-garlick @bogviolet @debitage @folio-sprout @emyscauldron @skimble-shanks-the-railway-cat @scooplery uhh girl help i forgot urls, please consider yourself tagged if you would like to be and tag me! <3