#and being like i know what would improve this story... fewer women is also considered shitty

[mill3nniumforc3]

When I was in college, I made a list of 10 things I wanted to accomplish by the time I was 30. I turned 30 earlier this month, sooo let's see what I did (or did not).

Have my Bachelors AND Masters Degree in elementary education- NO. I don't even have a Bachelors because I discovered during my practicum semester that elementary education is not what I want. It's probably a blessing in disguise because we saw how teachers were treated during the pandemic. I might not be working a glamorous job right now, but it pays the bills. Tbh, I probably make more at my job than I'd make as a teacher.

Be married to the love of my life and have at least two kids- NO. While I have found the love of my life and we do plan to be married someday, we aren't now because engagement rings and everything wedding is EXPENSIVE. It's also the same reason why we aren't currently trying to get pregnant. I do have six cats and two dogs, plus a nephew (with a niece who will be here very soon!).

Move out of Ohio and to a warmer state (preferably one of the Carolinas, Florida, or Georgia)- YES and YES! I moved to Georgia in 2020, and while the political atmosphere isn't the best (better than Florida, but not as good as some other states), it's REALLY fucking nice to rarely worry about shoveling my driveway, brushing and scraping off my car, and driving on icy roads. Plus, my seasonal affective disorder has improved since moving down here, which is always a win!

Visit all 50 states- NO. While I've been to most of the states east of the Mississippi River, I'm a long ways away from visiting all 50.

Briefly live in another country- NO. I think I wrote this because one of my friends from college went to South Korea for a year and I wanted to do something similar. I spent a week in St. Lucia last year, but that was to vacation, not to live.

Live in a nice house- YES... sort of. When I was in college, my definition of nice was probably a large, clean house with a bedroom for everyone, at least two bathrooms, and good for having company over. Right now, we live in a 3 story townhouse with two bedrooms (which is enough, since my boyfriend's mom lives with us) and three bathrooms (tbh, I don't think I'll ever live in a house with fewer than three again). It's clean for the most part, and I think I wanted emphasis on it being clean because my parents did not care about the house (or us) being clean. The house is not good enough for having company over the way we'd like, but we want to remodel the basement area and redo the deck in the future. We also don't plan to live in this house forever.

Have friends that I see or talk to regularly- NO. I barely have friends at all! There isn't anyone I was friends with in high school who is worth being my friend now (not a single one of them remembered my 30th birthday for fuck's sake! Meanwhile, I remember theirs every year, but whatever...). The college friends aren't much better. I only have one friend from college that I kinda-sorta talk to consistently (we're both very busy women, and most of our conversations are quick ones on Snapchat. Since we don't live in the same state, it's harder to make time for each other. Plus, I'm sure she's busy trying to plan out her wedding). The only person besides my boyfriend that I can sincerely call my friend who lives near me is my coworker.

Drive a nice car- YES... again, sort of. I'm pretty sure college me considered "nice" as a BMW, Mercedes, or Tesla (I REAAALLLY wanted a Tesla when I was in college). I drive a Nissan Kicks, and I fell in love with that car the moment I saw it. Besides, little did college me know that those expensive-name cars aren't much better than the common-name cars ("A Lexus is just a Toyota in disguise" I would often say).

Still write, play the Sims, and maybe restart making Sims videos- YES, EH, and NO. I still write, though the stories I write are not the same stories I wrote in college (I don't remember the last time I wrote about Jannie, Bailee, and Alex, though when I'm feeling nostalgic for it, I'll go back to read and maybe edit/add stuff to the existing stories). I don't play the Sims nearly as often as I used to, mainly because every time I boot up the game, I get bored and don't want to play it (if only I could still play The Sims 2...). With that said, I don't make Sims videos. I haven't made a Sims video since I was 15, and I probably got to thinking about making Sims videos again because I thought people would find the stories I make with my Sims interesting. I think I'll stick to watching Kelsey Impicciche.

BE HAPPY- YES! I am happy. I might have days and times when I'm sad, frustrated, annoyed, and even angry, and sometimes I think the world would be better off without me, but I am generally happy. I'm happier than college me could've imagined, and way happier than high school me thought was possible.

So, I didn't accomplish everything that college me wanted, but I think that's all ok. Some things happen for a reason, and even if the reason isn't obvious. Here's to all the adventures that lie ahead in this new decade of life.

[winepresswrath]

okay ik ppl can ship whoever they want and i usually don't mind but...it kinda irks me when the fandom ships wen qing and yanli bc like. yanli is in love with zixuan!!! he loves her back!!! they're married!!! they have a kid!!! (and no im not gonna use past tense it hurts too much) what part of this is hard to understand???? like ive seen ppl get pressed when someone ships a canonically gay character with someone of the opposite sex (and i get that it's because they feel they're trying to "normalise" them by making them straight) so why do ppl do the same with straight characters?

Aw, anon, I feel you on the xuanli shipping but a) I think you’ve come to the wrong place because I’m also plenty fond of Yanli/Wen Qing (qingli? yanqing? i’m a multishipper and i can’t help myself) and b) there’s a pretty big difference between depicting or imagining characters who have canonically been in relationships with and experienced attraction to members of the opposite sex in queer relationships and portraying gay characters in relationships with people of the opposite sex. For one thing, there’s nothing in canon that tells us Yanli isn’t a bi woman who just happens to be in a relationship with a dude in canon. Shipping her with Wen Qing isn’t actually any different from shipping her with Mingjue or Xichen. People are sometimes going to look at a canon ship and be like “but what if” no matter how good that ship is.

More importantly, there’s a lot of baggage surrounding the depiction of queer people in media that is pretty directly and unpleasantly related to the fact that many straight people still think that a) we shouldn’t exist and b) they have a right to pretend we don’t that is being violated every time we hold hands in public or write ourselves into stories or their fellow straight people, looking at the world around them and then seeking to depict that world in their art, include us rather than airbrushing us out for their convenience. Writing gay characters as straight isn’t bad because it normalizes the character, it’s bad because it contributes to a homophobic culture that tells queer people, and gay and lesbian people in particular, that their existence is somewhere between evil and an imposition, and they’re abnormal or depraved or just going through a phase and one day they’ll meet the right person and settle down to live heterosexually ever after.

There is a tendency in fandom to declare that female characters who, in canon, are depicted as being in love with or attracted to men are lesbians, and I am very sympathetic to the generalized exhaustion with he was a boy/she was a girl relationships, compulsory heterosexuality, and the general lack of lesbian representation that I think underlies a lot of that impulse. I personally am basically always exhausted by comphet and want more queer women of all kinds in everything. I am nevertheless also occasionally a little frustrated with what sometimes feels less like a desire for more lesbian content and more an excuse to sideline female characters and declare shipping them with popular male characters off limits. I also get being frustrated by being told that a relationship you really like and enjoy and has lots of canon support is somehow bad or invalid. I fully support you in going forth with a xuanli OTP and refusing to consider any other options and being lowkey irritated that other people do not see the truth and the beauty and the light! But people who ship Yanli and Wen Qing are not doing anything wrong.

[nevermindirah]

Non-Jewish friends, y’all might be wondering right now: Israel is doing clearly unacceptable shit to Palestinians. So, why are some Jews ardent Zionists, and why do some Jews seem to feel personally attacked by criticism of Israel?

A lot of (non-Palestinian) non-Jews have asked me where I stand on Israel/Palestine over the years, apropos of nothing, just because I’m Jewish. For the longest time I felt so stuck because I just didn’t know much about Israel/Palestine and what little I did know turned out to be largely misinformation and I felt so much pressure to say The Correct Thing That All Jews Should Say About This Issue. Obviously the violence Israel is committing against Palestinians is horrific and the interpersonal weirdness individual Jews might experience as people discuss Israel’s horrific violence doesn’t compare. I’m making this post as a small supplement to the important conversations going on about what Israel is doing to Palestinians in East Jerusalem, Gaza, and the West Bank, as well as Palestinian citizens of Israel and Palestinian refugees and their descendants living outside land Israel controls. I’m making this post because non-Jews might be feeling confused by conflicting messages about Zionism as either settler colonialism or Jewish self-determination. It sucks feeling like you have to choose only one oppressed group or another. It’s possible to support Palestinian liberation and Jewish liberation at the same time! Here’s some context that might help.

Palestinian friends will probably want to ignore this post, y’all shouldn’t have to deal with your oppressors’ feelings, and especially not right now.

Zionism is the ideology behind the devastating violence Israel is committing against Palestinians right now and has been committing against Palestinians since 1947-48. It’s heartbreaking and messy to talk about this reality, because Zionism originated as a strategy to protect Jews from antisemitism.

Any oppressed group can turn into oppressors under enough pressure, because humans are flawed. Jews fleeing antisemitism turning into Israelis ethnically cleansing Palestinians happened because Zionism is profoundly influenced by its time and place of origin: 19th century Europe.

Europe invented antisemitism, and basically every European country has done at least one very very bad structural antisemitism, like expelling all the country's Jews (the monarch and/or the church then stole all the wealth the expelled people had to leave behind), looking the other way when peasants murdered a bunch of Jews as an outlet for their frustration with the actual (non-Jewish) ruling class, banning Jews from owning property or holding certain jobs or being members of guilds etc, and of course the big horrific state-sponsored mass-murder operations the Inquisition and the Holocaust. From the 1790s through the 19th century different European governments emancipated their Jews, ie removed legal barriers to full citizenship and economic participation. But this didn't end antisemitism. Just like the legal improvements of the 19th and 20th centuries didn't end antiblackness in the United States.

Also happening in this time: nationalism swept Europe. From the French Revolution through the end of World War I, Europe’s predominant form of government transformed from multiethnic empires to nation-states, countries led by and for a particular ethnic group.

So this Austro-Hungarian dude Theodor Herzl came up with this idea for Jewish nationalism. Every other European ethnic group is getting their own country, so why not Jews? Maybe this is the solution to antisemitism! Maybe we’ll finally be safe if we just all move en masse out of Europe to a place that will take all of us and never expel us!

But also also happening in Europe and around the world in this time: European imperialism and white supremacist settler colonialism. Chattel slavery saw its height and then its end (legally, at least) during this era, but white supremacy entrenched itself across the planet in post-slavery economic practices and cultural imperialism as well as national and international laws.

I believe countries have a moral obligation to take in as many refugees as they can squeeze in. International law protecting refugees has evolved a lot over the past century, but we’re still devastatingly far from every refugee getting a safe place to call home, and the main reason for that is white supremacy. The Biden administration didn’t undo the Trump administration’s horrifically low cap on refugees until like last week and it’s because Democratic party leaders treat centrist white people as more valuable voters than the huge and growing numbers of people of color, immigrants, LGBT people, unmarried women, and working class people who want to vote for elected leaders who get that nobody’s free until we’re all free. Ahem. Back to the topic at hand, the US and many other countries turned away untold numbers of refugees fleeing the fucking Holocaust, so odds are slim they’d be more welcoming in less desperate times. Moving from places where Jews are an unwanted minority to places where Jews are still a minority and either still unwanted or little understood and unlikely to win revolutionary levels of support from a largely non-Jewish public seems like a bad plan.

In the mid to late 19th century, lots of Jews took the kernel of Zionism and ran with it in different directions. Maybe this ideology could mean Jewish cultural flourishing alongside stronger political/economic integration into the societies where we’re already living! Maybe it could mean a particular kind of socialism that advocates for the liberation of Jews both as Jews and as workers! Maybe it could mean a revitalization of Jewish religious practice both in Jerusalem where we have important heritage sites and everywhere we live across the world!

Eventually Herzl’s vision of Zionism won out over the others: Jewish nationalism in the sense of a Jewish nation-state, a country that has a Jewish demographic majority and/or that legally privileges Jews over non-Jews.

Problem is, if you want to do that, you have to find a piece of land on which to do it, and Earth was already a pretty crowded place a hundred years ago. Many locations were considered, and the one that ended up winning that debate was Palestine. Where a shit ton of people, mostly non-Jews, were already living. They were forming their own nationalist movement at the time: in the waning days of the Ottoman Empire they began to organize for local self-determination in Palestine.

The Herzl types who developed Zionism as an ideology and built institutions to advocate for and create a Jewish ethnostate in Palestine were a small subset of European Jews, mostly men, mostly with significant economic privilege within what Jews were able to achieve in their particular societies at the time. They were just as Orientalist as the non-Jews around them, just as antiblack, just as racist generally for all that Jews were (and sometimes still are) considered non-white in much of Europe. They had a cool idea (put a lot of effort into something that could protect Jews from antisemitism) floating in a bathtub full of shit, and they did practically nothing to protect the cool idea from absorbing that shit. Results of this include thinking about the millions of people already living in Palestine as if they were either like the rocks and the trees that will go with the flow and accept a new ruling class, or indistinct Arabs who would just leave for other Arab countries because what could be the difference — in the staggeringly small amount of time they considered the existing residents of Palestine at all.

This racist hand-waving extended to Zionist leaders’ attitudes about Jews outside Europe as well. White Jews in settler colonies like the US were largely anti-Zionist at the time (not wanting their own countries to accuse them of dual loyalty was a common reason) but European Zionist leaders took what help they could get from Jews in the US, South Africa, Australia, etc. Jews across the Middle East and North Africa, however, barely heard from Zionist leaders about any of this until Zionist militias had removed enough Palestinians from the land and it was time to repopulate it with whichever Jewish bodies were convenient. You might have heard "all the Arab countries expelled their Jews in 1948" but lots of first-person accounts tell a different story of Israel coercing Jews who’d lived securely for a long time in places like Morocco to immigrate to Israel and then confiscating their passports and forcing them to live on less-fertile land with fewer resources while serving as a buffer between Palestinians and European Jewish immigrants. Ella Shohat is the best-known writer on Israeli racism against non-European Jews and I strongly recommend Sephardim in Israel: Zionism from the Perspective of Its Jewish Victims as a starting point to learn more about this.

Which brings us to today. We still haven’t eradicated antisemitism, several European governments that did a lot of structural antisemitism they still haven’t made meaningful reparations for get to feel good about themselves for “giving the Jews a state” as if carving up the former Ottoman Empire was up to them and not the people who lived there, and millions of people across the world who previously either lived peacefully enough alongside Jews or hadn’t really thought about us much at all now have very valid reasons to be pissed at this country that claims it represents all of us.

Zionism was supposed to protect Jews from antisemitism. And Israel has saved Jewish lives! But if we hadn’t sunk the past 70+ years into an ethnostate we could’ve been putting that energy into other political and economic activity to create adequate international support for refugees while we work on ending root causes of refugee crises, like antisemitism, racism, climate change, and capitalism. Meanwhile Zionism has killed, maimed, incarcerated, stolen from, traumatized, and erased the history of millions of Palestinians just because they happened to be living on land that some dudes who had a lot more in common with Thomas Jefferson and Donald Trump than with you or me decided needed to be cleansed for a Jewish ethnostate.

White nationalists in the US love Israel because they want American Jews to go away. Fascist leaders across Europe love Israel for the same reason, so much so that Israel’s prime minister is buddy-buddy with Trump and the equivalent shitstains of several European far-right parties. And I don’t know what it’s like in other white supremacist countries that are close allies of Israel, but the overwhelming majority of Zionist lobbying that pushes the US to give so much aid to Israel comes from Evangelical Christians, because they believe all the Jews have to be in the Holy Land for Jesus to come back. No thanks.

This whole thing fucking sucks. Jews and Palestinians, like all human beings, deserve to be free. Many Jews are understandably afraid of what might happen next if Israel decided to give up on ethnonationalism, allow Palestinian refugees to return, make reparations, and establish a pluralistic democracy that represents and protects all its residents — will some Palestinians murder Jews in revenge? That’s genuinely fucking scary. And it’s genuinely fucking scary to be a Palestinian in Israel/Palestine, and has been for over 70 years. We’ve gotta do something different. I say that as a white person sitting on land stolen from Piscataway people who has thought in detail about what portion of my income would be reasonable for my government to tax in order to fund reparations for the descendants of enslaved people.

Ok. One final piece of context before I wrap this up.

Most Jewish institutions in the US are explicitly Zionist, teach children that Zionism is THE way to ensure Jewish safety, and increasingly tell non-Zionist Jews that we're unwelcome or even that we’re not “real” Jews. This comes in a context where it’s only been 76 years since the latest and most gruesome of several attempts to wipe our entire people off the face of the planet. If you grew up in that environment, you, too, might be jumpy about even hearing the words Zionism or Israel, let alone considering the devastation this ideology and country have caused Palestinians.

Jews have a right to exist. Jews have a millennia-old connection to this scrap of land in the Levant, and we have a right to access religiously and culturally important geographic landmarks. What we don't have a right to is murdering or expelling other people in order to make an ethnostate, on that land or any other. Zionism is settler colonialism, but it’s settler colonialism by and for people who have a valid need for protection from structural antisemitism, which means that it’s going to take a lot of messy empathy to undo. The members of my extended family who voted for Trump (non-Jews in my case, though Jared Kushner isn’t the only Jewish Trumpite) are afraid that ending white supremacy will demote them from a privileged class to equal footing with everyone else — that’s the kind of fear individuals work on in therapy, not the kind that’s reasonable for a whole society to prevent from happening. I and millions of Jews do deserve for whole societies to work hard to end antisemitism.

I would never and will never ask a Palestinian to gently request their liberation. But if you’re not Palestinian, and you’ve got a little extra empathy to spare this week, I ask you to remember what I’ve shared here when interacting with Jews about Israel/Palestine.

If you’re a fellow Jew reading this and you feel like Israel is the only way to guarantee our safety, all I ask of you is to sit with the idea that what Israel is doing to Palestinians is too high a cost for safety that’s still not guaranteed, and start to imagine real-world ways we can protect our people from antisemitism without an ethnostate.

I made this post for people who know me (or know of me I guess?) in Old Guard and Cap fandom, despite my better judgment, because talking about Jewish Booker and Jewish Bucky and Jewish Natasha makes me so happy and I think some of the people I love on these characters with might appreciate this perspective. I didn’t provide any links in this post on purpose (to decrease its usefulness, so fewer people will reblog it) because the risk of anon hate when talking about Zionism outside my immediate fandom circles is so high. You’re welcome to reblog this post if you find it helpful! Unless you’re not within a few concentric circles of me, in which case, maybe don’t? If seeing this post makes you want to send me anon hate, no need: many people who share your perspective have already done so on Twitter.

Reliable sources on all this info are a few googles away, and I apologize for the things I know I oversimplified as well as any things I might have misremembered. I’m an American who’s never lived in Israel/Palestine who is posting this on my fandom blog.

TL;DR: This is a short ‘n pithy post about the same idea.

TL;DR, fandom edition: The shortest distillation of this anti-Zionist Jew’s feelings on the matter can be found in segment 4 of Five Times Booker Got Wasted on Purim and One Time He Didn’t.

[dimigex]

New Altered Reality Chapter!

A03 / FF 

I think it’s been like . . two years since I updated this story XD oops. The story is linked at the top if you want the full chapter and/or story. This is only a portion of the new chapter because it’s over 6k words 

"Why don't you go train for a little while? It might take your mind off things." Rin made the suggestion as gentle as possible, ignoring the frustration that seethed just beneath the surface of her calm. She wanted the apartment to herself for a few hours and desperately needed Kakashi to stop fussing over her. Then, she'd be able to relax the way that she was supposed to. The man's constant attention put her on edge.

Since the doctor's appointment four days ago, Kakashi had been acting like a brooding hen. When Rin stood up to get her book from the bedroom, he'd jumped to his feet and offered to go instead. He didn't want her standing long enough to cook or clean, so he'd taken over those duties as well. While Kakashi was decent in the kitchen, he'd kept everything bland and refused to add any salt to the dishes. If the man mentioned her blood pressure one more time, Rin was fairly certain that hers would rise to dangerous levels when she yelled at him.

At Rin's words, Kakashi glanced up from the book in his lap. The man's brow furrowed as he marked his place with a finger. "What if you need something while I'm gone?"

"Then, I'll get it myself," Rin answered. She moderated her tone to placating rather than annoyed. It was more difficult than she expected. "I'm hardly an invalid, you know?"

"The doctor said you needed rest." Kakashi argued for the umpteenth time, as if Rin had forgotten it, as if he would give her a chance to forget it.

Rin held up her hand to stop Kakashi's next arguments before they could form. Slowly, she counted to five under her breath. The idea of laying in bed or on the couch for even one minute longer made her physically ill. She had done everything that she was supposed to: drinking glass after glass of water to keep herself hydrated, keeping the lights dim and the room quiet, resting on her left side whenever possible. There had been a dozen tiny things that might make a difference, or might not.

While that scenario would sound like a dream for some women, to Rin, it was a nightmare. She missed the days when training and missions kept her mind and body racing. When she was in the village, Rin kept herself busy wherever the hospital needed an extra set of hands. She hadn't chosen her specialization yet, but she was leaning toward pediatrics. Most medical nin worked in triage and emergencies, but there were plenty of quiet days as well. Rin liked the idea of helping children feel better rather than focusing on battle injuries.

Rin realized that her mind had drifted from the topic at hand and brought her eyes back to Kakashi. She couldn't help but appreciate the changes in her husband in the past few days, even when they annoyed her. In some ways, he was more like himself and others, he was totally different. Rin could manage the symptoms of her pregnancy; she'd done that when morning sickness left her more or less living on the bathroom floor for two months. But, she couldn't handle the hovering worry that radiated off of Kakashi.

"Why don't you go see if Minato has an update on your team?" Rin suggested, pushing into a sitting position.

Apprehension entered Kakashi's eyes. The man still hadn't been able to explain his nervousness over the chunin exams, no matter how much he tried. Rin almost felt bad for bringing up the memory, almost. Team Seven was the only distraction that could get Kakashi out of her hair for an hour or two. Sensing the man's wavering resolve, Rin pushed. "I'm just going to take a bath anyway. A cool one," Rin amended when Kakashi opened his mouth. He had been reading one of her many books about the dos and don't of pregnancy; Rin wished that she'd thrown them out once she finished.

"I'm sure he would have sent someone if there was news," Kakashi countered. His voice lacked its usual certainty, however. He wanted to know what was happening with his students as much as Rin wanted some time to breathe.

Rin nodded, running a hand through her hair. "Probably, but it would be good for you to get your mind off this mess." She gestured around the apartment. "Besides, if I need you, I can create a clone to find you. I still know how to do some things."

Over the past few months, Rin had been developing her chakra control. Once her pregnancy had been confirmed, she'd been removed from active duty. With missions off the table, she spent more time at the hospital. Even so, Rin was only permitted to assist with certain cases, so she spent her free time working through exercises that improved her control. Hopefully, that would allow her the freedom to study more medical ninjutsu after the baby was born. If she'd learned anything from being on a team with hotheaded Obito and reckless Kakashi, it was that a medic was always necessary.

"You promise you'll come find me if you need anything?" Kakashi's voice held a note of uncertainty that surprised Rin. When she nodded, he tucked a strip of cloth into the book on his lap and placed it on the table. "I won't be gone long, but maybe you're right. I'm sure there are rumors about teams finishing the second exam by now."

"Take your time," Rin offered, schooling her face to impassivity. If she looked hopeful at the free time, Kakashi would see the trap. He stood, stretching the stiff muscles in his back, then glanced in her direction. A slight frown appeared on his face.

He's debating whether or not to kiss me, Rin realized with a start. While Kakashi had changed significantly over the past few days, the hesitancy about displaying emotions with her remained. Honestly, it didn't bother Rin as much as his lost memories did. Kakashi had always been private and reserved with his affections. Deciding to meet him halfway, Rin caught his hand with hers and squeezed. Kakashi exhaled in relief.

"Go on," Rin prompted, dropping her fingers away. "I'll be good, I promise."

A smile tugged at the corners of Kakashi's mouth as he stepped closer. To Rin's surprise, he leaned in and pressed a warm kiss to her forehead. An unfamiliar explosion of heat washed through her chest at the gesture. "I'll bring dinner home," Kakashi continued, completely unaware of the effect he had on her. "Don't even think of trying to make it while I'm gone."

"Promise," Rin laughed, hoping that her smile disguised the fact that she had just been considering that very thing.

When the door shut behind Kakashi, Rin glanced at the calendar on the wall. She calculated how much longer she'd have to endure Kakashi's worrying before life could get back to normal. If everything went perfectly, they would meet their son in twelve weeks; Rin could hang on that long. She didn't have a choice.

When a brief knock sounded on the office door, Minato glanced up from the paperwork in his hand. Shikaku slipped through before he had time to answer, and Minato's heart leaped into his throat. "Has there been news?"

The second chunin exam was coming to a close, and there still hadn't been any word of Naruto's team. Minato knew that his son and his teammates were talented shinobi, but the exams were designed to be taxing. He'd seen just as many groups fail because of bad luck as poor skill. With the relative peace in the shinobi nations, fewer genin were advanced to the next rank. Minato agreed with the changes, but he could still remember all too well how quickly the ninja wars had started.

Shikaku shook his head as he shut the door behind him. "None about Team Seven."

Minato understood what the man wasn't saying; there were more important things to worry about than Naruto's advancement. Shikaku's son was also competing in the exams, he had to be wondering about the same things as Minato, but Shikaku remained detached. He stayed focused on the other matters that required his attention to keep the village running. Shikaku had been an excellent pick as Minato's second in command, and Minato didn't know what he would do without him most days.

Dipping his head in understanding, Minato pressed a thumb and forefinger against his eyes to stave off a headache. It had been a stressful week. When he wasn't torn between worries over Kakashi's memory and Naruto's performance, Minato had been dealing with chaos of having multiple villages together. There had been half a dozen fights to break up, tempers that needed soothing, and the exhaustion of hosting delegates. He cringed. "What is it this time? A broken nose over which kage is the strongest? Blood feud over the death of a distant relative? A comment taken the wrong way?"

"None of the above." Shikaku didn't crack a smile at Minato's attempted levity. Whatever he had come to say must be bad. Minato waited in silence. "I wasn't sure what to make of the report, so I brought it to you immediately. Someone made an attempt against the village barrier."

Minato shifted, mind flashing back to Kakashi's warning about Orochimaru. Even so, he forced himself to think logically rather than responding with a knee jerk reaction. "Did the Anbu tasked with that portion of the village find anything out of the ordinary? Which team was it?"

Again, Shikaku shook his head. "Obito's team deemed it a false alarm, something bound to happen with this many foreigners in the village."

Minato nodded without answering. Technically, his advisor shouldn't know the names of the men and women in Anbu, but Obito's presence hadn't been easy to hide, especially from someone who worked closely with Minato. Shikaku had been an effective jonin commander because he knew the strengths and weaknesses of every jonin in the village. There were few who weren't under his purview at some point, but Minato had no doubt that the man knew them as well. He wouldn't be good at his job if he didn't.

"Was there any evidence to suggest otherwise, anything at all?" Minato hated asking the question, but he couldn't afford to be lax with village safety during the chunin exams. There had been too many warnings to write this off as a coincidence. Though, he knew that if Shikaku had more information, he would have supplied it already.

Shikaku's sigh spoke volumes. He'd been under the same pressure as Minato the past couple of weeks. "No, everything appears to be in order."

Minato wondered if Shikaku had been thinking about Kakashi's warning when he brought that message. As much as Minato wanted to, he hadn't been able to keep that solely between himself and Inoichi. He relied on Shikaku too much to withhold such critical information. Even so, he held back as much as he could about Kakashi's memory loss. Until he figured out the cause, the less that everyone else knew, the better.

Tapping long fingers against the polished wood of his desk, Minato considered. He wanted to hear the report from his Anbu, but that would require summoning Obito. Or, perhaps, he could get by with asking Tenzo about it. The remorse that Obito had shown for what he did to Kakashi wasn't enough; the boy needed to realize that his behavior would not be tolerated. Minato decided to summon Tenzo once Shikaku left and get the full report on the disturbance. Though, he suspected it was a false alarm.

Sensing that he'd only skimmed the surface of Shikaku's reports, Minato nodded. "What else?"

A wry grin twisted the jonin's commander's face as he glanced down at the notes in his hand. "Uchiha Fugaku has requested a private meeting with you." Minato's eyebrows rose at that, wondering who Fugaku would want to talk about, one of his sons or Obito. It wasn't like the clan head to meet with Minato for something minor.

Minato dipped his head in understanding, then Shikaku continued his thought. "He requests a private meeting in the Uchiha compound."

The locale didn't surprise Minato. Fugaku must have found out something about the mystery surrounding Kakashi, but it wasn't something he wanted to risk being overhead. Which meant that it probably touched on some clan secret. Having the Hokage come to the compound instead of the other way around would raise the clan's opinion of Fugaku, at least. There were still some people, particularly in the Uchiha clan, who wished that Fugaku had become Hokage instead of Minato. Hopefully the man's information would be worth the hassle.

Minato glanced at the clock. It wasn't quite noon, and he was already longing for home. "When am I supposed to be there?"

Shikaku consulted his notes to be sure he was correct before speaking. "Tonight. Your schedule was too full to allow time during the day, and with the second exam ending in the morning, there wasn't another opportunity."

Fugaku didn't want to wait that long, Minato realized after a moment. He dipped his head in understanding; there were a million loose ends that needed to be tied up before the final exam could begin. Even problems as important as this one had to wait. Minato rubbed at his temples in frustration, then gestured for Shikaku to continue. "What else?"

(Full chapter and story available on A03 and FF, linked at top of the post)

[tsuki-chibi]

Avengers Valentine’s Fic: Six Hands are Better than Two

Read it on AO3!

--------

When her cup of tea was ready, Pepper carried it over to the table and sat down. She took a careful, too-hot sip, then set her cup down and looked at the tablet sitting in front of her. This was it. The moment of truth. Despite of her nerves, her hands remained remarkably steady as she picked up the tablet and unlocked it. The first file opened seamlessly, and she scanned it with a critical eye.

She knew exactly what she was looking for. The biggest issue was finding it. The first few she dismissed out of hand due to various health problems. The fifth file showed a man with blond hair; she lingered over that one for a minute before flicking past, knowing that she would prefer someone with darker hair. The sixth was passed over for the same reason. Then she landed on the seventh, showing a striking man with dark brown hair, blue eyes, and a broad smile with straight, white teeth.

“Not him. Too much like a movie star.”

Pepper shrieked and jumped about a foot in the air. “Tony! What the hell?!”

Tony laughed as he sat down beside her, close enough to steal the tablet but out of range of any punches. “I asked JARVIS to tell me when you started looking at the profiles,” he said smugly. “I wanted to see too.”

“JARVIS, you traitor,” Pepper muttered without any heat.

“My apologies, Ms. Potts, but Sir was most persuasive.”

Knowing what that meant, Pepper shook her head. “Tony, you have got to stop threatening to sell them to MIT,” she said, exasperated. “One of these days JARVIS is going to take you seriously and have himself voluntarily moved, and then where will you be?”

“J loves me too much for that,” Tony said dismissively, continuing to flick through. “Is this really all you have to choose from? Slim pickings.”

Pepper sighed and rested her cheek on her hand. “Well, fewer men are donating sperm now,” she said frankly. “People are nervous about having biological children showing up on their doorstep in twenty years.” She could appreciate that fear, but it made this process no less frustrating.

When she had first decided that she wanted a baby, Pepper had thought long and hard about her choices. As an aromantic woman, she had absolutely zero interest in a relationship. She liked sex – was rather good at sex, actually – but that was about the extent of it. And no one night stand or frequent booty call was going to agree to have a baby with her without bringing feelings into the mix. Eventually they’d want more: they’d want a relationship, the whole 2.5 kids and white picket fence, and the thought made her skin crawl.

No romance. No relationships. Just a kid. That was harder to get than she had anticipated. She had done quite a bit of research into adoption, but every place she had reached out to had unapologetically informed her that they were reluctant to adopt a child to a single woman. She probably could’ve paved the way by throwing money at the situation, but she was loathe to do that when she’d already be facing a ton of media scrutiny as it was.

There was also surrogacy as an option, but Pepper was more than willing to carry the baby herself. It was Rhodey who had suggested that she go to a donation clinic. Pepper hadn’t seen any harm in looking to see what was available; she wasn’t committing herself just by looking. But she hadn’t anticipated how lackluster it would be. Did she really want to choose the father of her child like she’d pick out a pair of shoes?

Well, no. Of course she didn’t. But she was running out of options – and time. She was turning thirty-five after this year, so she was approaching the threshold where pregnancies were a higher risk. She was already aware she was probably only going to do this once, so she had to make it count. This was the best resort. She held a hand out for the tablet back, but Tony shook his head.

“Seriously, Pep, you don’t have to go with one of these losers,” he said.

“Then how else am I supposed to make it happen? I am not interested in a relationship,” Pepper said, a bit more forcefully than was necessary considering who she was talking to, but she was so damn sick of having to repeat herself. People thought there was something wrong with a woman who didn’t want a relationship. There was a reason she and Tony had covered for each other for as long as they did.

“I know you’re not,” Tony said, far more kindly than she deserved, and Pepper’s shoulders slumped.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to bite your head off,” she said. Out of everyone, Tony knew exactly what it was like to fall short of people’s expectations. He had cultivated a reputation as a slut early on to keep people from figuring out that the infamous Tony Stark had no interest in sex: he would bring drunk women home with him and then put them to bed. Anyone who remembered going to bed alone never wanted to admit that Tony hadn’t slept with them, so they’d make up stories. And she was pretty sure the sex tapes had been faked.

After Afghanistan, when Tony could no longer bear the idea of bringing strangers home, he and Pepper had officially become a couple to give them both some relief. Unofficially Pepper had cultivated a few discreet fuck buddies, while Tony had been content to remain alone. Their agreement had worked very well to keep them both from being bothered by the media, or worse hunted by prospective partners, until Tony met Dr. Stephen Strange.

Pepper had seen the writing on the wall from the moment they returned home from the fight on Titan, having been victorious. Stephen looked at Tony like Tony was something precious, and Tony’s eyes lit up whenever Stephen walked into a room. Naturally, the two of them had awkwardly danced around each other for a few months before Pepper got impatient and forced them to talk it out.

“That’s okay. I get it. Hell, no one gets it better than me,” Tony said. He set the tablet down and looked at her seriously. “What if I offered to do it?”

Her eyebrows jumped. “You’re gonna have sex with me. You.”

“Eww, no,” Tony said, making a face. “But I’d happily donate some of my sperm to the cause. Stephen says that the whole process is way more advanced than it used to be, but that there’s plenty of room for improvement… maybe he and I will take a look at it and see if we can’t figure something out.”

“If anyone could do it, it would be you too,” Pepper said, still reeling from the offer. “You… you’d seriously want a baby?”

“I’ve been thinking about it. I know you and I didn’t work out, but I still think any kid of ours would be awesome.” Tony gave a small smile that quickly faded as he added, “I mean, I understand if you don’t want to. I’ll probably end up being a shitty dad –”

“Tony, no. That’s not it. Anyone who sees you with Peter knows you’re a wonderful dad,” Pepper said immediately.

“It’s not really the same,” Tony mumbled, looking embarrassed.

“Yes, it is and you know it. He literally calls you and Stephen ‘dad’,” Pepper pointed out.

“But we didn’t raise him,” Tony said. He shook his head. “Anyway, I just wanted you to know that the offer is there if you’re interested.”

Pepper hummed softly. “What did Stephen say?”

“He’s okay with it. You can talk to him about it if you want to, which you probably should.”

“He’s ready to be a parent?” Pepper asked. “Or are you just looking to make a donation and that’s all?”

“No, we want to be parents with you. Midnight feedings and all. You could move into a room on our floor, and we can set the baby up in the room between us and you. That way, we can help equally. And you’d still be able to go back to your floor when you needed a break,” Tony explained, sounding adorably eager.

“You’re really serious about this,” Pepper said, amazed. At one time, Tony hadn’t been sure that he wanted to be a father at all. That was all Howard Stark’s influence as far as Pepper was concerned. She knew that Tony would be a great dad, but Tony was petrified that he was going to turn out like his father. Having Peter around had done wonders for Tony’s confidence in that regard.

“I am… but only if you’re okay with it. I get that it could be awkward or uncomfortable,” Tony said. “I mean… Stephen and I would still be Avengers and everything.” He looked up uncertainly.

“Let me think about it,” Pepper said slowly. “Is that okay?”

“Sure. Take all the time you need.” He stood up, passed her the tablet, and ambled causally out of the room. Only someone who knew him well, like Pepper did, could recognize how tense he was as he went. He really, really wanted this, she realized.

“JARVIS, have Tony and Stephen really talked about this?” Pepper asked.

“Yes, Ms. Potts. In great detail,” JARVIS replied. “Dr. Strange has just arrived home. Would you like to speak with him?”

“Please,” Pepper said. She believed Tony when he said that Stephen was okay with this, but she wanted to be sure before she even started considering this. She didn’t want a baby to be the thing that came between Tony and the only person he’d ever seriously fallen in love with.

It was only a few minutes before Stephen joined her in the kitchen. He was wearing his uniform, minus the Cloak, and looked tired. Pepper waved him to the table and got up to make herself another cup of tea. She also poured one for Stephen. Unlike Tony, who might as well have had coffee in his veins considering how much of the stuff he drank, Stephen preferred tea. When she turned around, Stephen had picked up the tablet and was flipping through the profiles. Pepper rolled her eyes.

“See anyone interesting?” she asked, sitting again.

“I see some people who may have lied on their applications,” Stephen said critically, stopping at one profile and frowning down at it. “Besides, I believe the more important question is whether you’ve seen anyone interesting.”

“I didn’t get very far before Tony interrupted me,” she admitted. “He had a proposition.”

Stephen didn’t look surprised. “He mentioned he was planning to bring it up today. What did you think?”

“I’m not opposed to the idea,” Pepper said carefully. In truth, it was the best option she’d heard yet. “But I wanted to see what you thought. This isn’t just between me and Tony. I know Tony; he’ll want to be there 100%. And that effectively makes you a father too.”

“It does,” Stephen agreed, his blank expression giving nothing away.

“So… are you okay with that?” Pepper said. “Is that something you want? If it’s not, now is the time to say it.”

“I never imagined I would have a child,” Stephen told her. His hands shook as he lifted his cup. “Particularly after the accident. I lost all interest in sex after that, and a couple of the medications that I’m on would make it difficult for me to get someone pregnant.”

Pepper nodded, having already known this. Tony had told her in confidence after she professed worry over how the two of them would get on, what with Tony’s complete lack of interest in sex. Stephen wasn’t asexual, or at least he didn’t claim the label for himself, but based on what Tony said he was pretty adamant about never wanting to have sex. Luckily, that suited Tony perfectly fine.

“But that doesn’t mean I’m not intrigued by the idea. I like having Peter around. I like seeing the joy that Peter’s presence brings to both Tony and myself. I would very much enjoy raising a child. We’ve talked about adoption, but then when you started looking into donations, Tony suggested this could be a convenient solution for all of us.” Stephen hesitated briefly. “My one concern is that I’m not sure how much help I would be at first. My hands…” He trailed off, grimacing.

“It’s fine,” Pepper said gently. “Tony and I will be there. Hell, there are plenty of people in the tower to help. And trust me, there is still plenty you could do.”

“So you’re considering it?” he asked.

“Well… yes, I am. Some people might think it’s crazy… my mom sure will. But I really want a baby, and I like the idea of my child being a part of someone I know and love,” she said. “Even better if it’s Tony, because I know him so well. Plus, Tony brings you to the table as well. The idea of three parents instead of being a single mom sweetens the pot significantly.” She smiled to show that she was teasing, even though she was partially serious.

Stephen smiled too. “Give it some thought. You don’t need to decide right away.” He sat back, rubbing his neck. “JARVIS, where is Tony?”

“Sir is in the workshop.”

Pepper and Stephen exchanged exasperated looks, and then Stephen stood up. “I better go get him out of there, or he’ll pull another all-nighter.”

“Please do,” Pepper said, standing up herself. She picked up her tablet as Stephen left, and did a quick pass through all of the profiles. Some of them sounded impressive, but… she cast a thoughtful look at the door and hummed under her breath as she washed her cup out and set it in the dishwasher.

She did a lot of thinking over the next couple of days. She talked to Rhodey, who was very much in support of the idea, and she talked to her mother, who was very much not. And she also spent some time looking seriously at the files that the agency had given her, trying to decide who she might pick if she decided not to take Tony up on his offer. The problem was, Stephen’s skepticism had made her nervous. After all, she was trusting that complete strangers were who they said they were, and Pepper had been burned that way before in far less high-stakes situations.

There was always the option of asking JARVIS to run background checks, but honestly Pepper wasn’t sure she wanted JARVIS to bother wasting the processing power. Not when, the more she thought about it, the more she realized that she had never wanted to be a single mother. It was just the only avenue that she felt was open to her, and she wanted a baby badly enough to accept the cons.

But why do so when she didn’t have to?

It was late at night when Pepper crawled out of bed and padded, bare foot, to the elevator. JARVIS took her down to the common room floor, where she knew that some of the Avengers had been having a late night watching movies. As expected, everyone else was gone and Stephen and Tony were alone in the room, cuddled up on the couch: the two of them had a bad habit of falling asleep there and then regretting it the next day.

Pepper paused for a moment in the doorway, staring at the two of them with a smile. Stephen was laying on the couch itself on his back, bare feet stick out from beneath the blanket. Tony was laying half on top of him and half on the couch, mostly buried beneath the blanket. They made for an adorable sight, one that made her heart swell with happiness on Tony’s behalf.

This was all that Tony had ever wanted. This, right here. Or so she had thought. But maybe there was something else that Tony wanted too, which Pepper had never considered before. Being asexual and not wanting to have sex meant that there was a very obvious obstacle in the way of Tony having kids, but even more than that Tony had to be extremely careful about who he had a child with. Way too many people would take total advantage of him if it meant getting their greedy hands into the Stark fortune.

She didn’t need to take advantage; Tony would gladly hand her his entire fortune without blinking an eye. Hell, in a way he already had by making Pepper the CEO of Stark Industries. Technically, if she had been so inclined, Pepper could’ve overthrown Tony and forced him out of his own company. Thankfully for Tony, she had absolutely no intention of doing that. S.I. would die without Tony’s genius guiding the way, which was something that men like Obadiah Stane were too stupid to realize.

She padded over to the couch and sat down on Tony’s side. Stephen awoke first, blinking owlishly. “Something wrong?”

“No, not at all,” Pepper said. She patted Tony’s knee.

“Huh – wha?” Tony was slower to stir. “Pep?”

“I wanted to see if your offer was still open,” Pepper said.

Tony snapped to immediately. “Of course it is!”

“Good. Because I think I want to take you up on it,” she said.

“Seriously?” Tony said.

“Seriously.”

“Oh my god,” Stephen said. “You’re going to have a baby.”

Pepper wasn’t sure who he was talking to, but she shook her head. “No. We’re” she gestured between the three of them “are having a baby.”

The resulting brilliant smiles that lit up both Tony’s and Stephen’s face made her feel warm from head to toe, and she knew immediately that she’d made the right decision. She beamed as Tony and Stephen kissed with joy, and then Tony pushed himself up and threw his arms around her. Pepper hugged him back happily, returning Stephen’s smile over Tony’s shoulder.

They were really gonna do this, and she knew that three of them would do it right.

[wisdomrays]

TAFAKKUR: Part 89

Healing and Faith: Part 2

Dr. Harold Koenig

Among the pioneers of the study of faith's healing potential is Harold Koenig, an associate professor of psychiatry and director of the Center for the Study of Religion, Spirituality, and Health at Duke University Medical Center. Koenig first noticed the significance of faith as a factor in medical recovery when he was a young family doctor. He was consulted about a patient who had been hospitalized for a month after hip surgery. Her husband had died of a sudden stroke, and she had slipped on ice at his funeral and fractured her hip. The surgeon warned him that she was emotionally vulnerable. Indeed, she had experienced events that normally would trigger clinical depression and thus undermine her recovery.

He was therefore surprised to find the old lady cheerful when he entered her room. She said: "What can I do for you, Doctor?" Koenig's search for obvious signs of depression-fatigue, darkened or tear-reddened eyes, difficulty concentrating-indicated nothing. Upon further conversation, he discovered that she maintained her cheerful mood by reading the Bible. She told him: "If I wake up alone or afraid, I read my Bible or talk to God. He is always there, even when my loved ones are not. It's the most important thing that keeps me going."

Koenig was impressed. When she recovered with few complications, he felt compelled to study further the medical significance of such deep faith. Since that event, numerous patients have told him how their faith helped them cope, thus speeding their physical healing. His research team, which has studied thousands of Americans since 1984, has compiled powerful evidence that religious faith not only promotes overall good health, but also helps patients recover from serious illness.

"By praying to God, patients acquire an indirect form of control over their illness." They believe they are not alone in their struggle, and that God is personally interested in them. This safeguards them against the psychological isolation that batters so many seriously ill people. In a study of 455 elderly hospital patients, Koenig found that people who attended church more than once a week averaged about four days in the hospital. People who never or rarely attended church spent about ten to twelve days of hospitalization.

Dr. Dale Matthews

Dale Matthews is an associate professor of medicine at Georgetown University Medical Center, Washington, DC. As a young internist in the early 1980s, he met a patient with strong faith who would make a lasting impact on his life. The man said: "I am a devout Christian. If you're going to be my doctor, I want you to pray with me" before allowing Matthews to treat him. Matthews had never shared his own faith with his patients, so at first he was reluctant. But nevertheless he joined hands with the man, who he hoped would keep quiet and keep the matter secret. After all, he did not want to be labeled "unscientific." He was alarmed when the man's booming voice filled the examination room. But Matthews had a crucial realization that day: His patient was a whole person, not a composite of symptoms and tests forming a "case." This led him to become sensitive to signals indicating that religion is important to a patient. If someone says: "I hope from God that nothing bad shows up in these tests," Matthews will say: "Tell me your thoughts about God." He declares: "We cannot prove scientifically that God heals, but I believe we can prove that belief in God has a beneficial effect." In his recently published book The Faith Factor, he incorporates religious wisdom, scientific research, and patients' stories to make a case for the faith-health connection.

Statistical Findings

Health care institutions are beginning to pay attention to the faith-health connection. Harvard Medical School, the Mayo Clinic, and the AAAS have sponsored conferences on spirituality and health. Nearly half of all American medical schools now offer courses on the topic. Below we give findings of some published studies on the topic.

• In a survey of 269 doctors at the 1996 meeting of the American Academy of Family Physicians, 99 percent said they thought religious beliefs could contribute to healing. When asked about their personal experiences, 63 percent of doctors said God intervened to improve their own medical conditions. Their patients agree even more enthusiastically that prayer is a powerful tool in healing. Polls by Time/CNN and USA Weekend show that about 80 percent of Americans believe spiritual faith or prayer can help people recover from illness or injury, and more than 60 percent think doctors should talk to patients about faith and even pray with those who request it.

• According to researchers at Columbia University, children whose religiously committed mothers are less likely to suffer from depression later in life. In their study, 60 mothers and 151 children were followed over 10 years to determine if there was any relationship between a mother's religious commitment and resulting depression in her children. The study found that daughters, but not sons, of women who considered religion to be highly important were 60 percent less likely to have a major depressive disorder at the 10-year followup. A second important factor linked with less depression was the degree to which the children embraced their mother's religion. When the mother and child were members of the same religious denomination at the followup, daughters were 71 percent less likely to suffer from a major depressive disorder while sons were 84 percent less likely.

• Another significant finding of the study was that highly religious mothers were less likely to be depressed themselves. Women for whom religion was highly important were 81 percent less likely to have major depression at the 10-year followup. This finding is consistent with other studies showing an inverse relationship between religiosity and depression. Several possible explanations exist for these findings. According to the researchers, highly religious mothers also were less likely to be divorced or exhibit poor social functioning—-both of which could contribute to depression in children. Another potential explanation comes from a recent study at the Medical College of Virginia, which found that religion can protect people from depression by buffering them against stressful life events.

• A Dartmouth Medical School study found that heart patients were 14 times more likely to die following surgery if they did not participate in group activities and did not find comfort in religion. Within six months of surgery 21 patients died, but there were no deaths among 37 people who said they were "deeply religious."

• A Yale University study of 2,812 elderly people found that those who never or rarely attended church had nearly twice the stroke rate of weekly church-goers.

• A survey of 5,286 Californians found that church members have lower death rates than nonmembers—regardless of such risk factors as smoking, drinking, obesity, and inactivity.

• Those with a religious commitment had fewer symptoms or had better health outcomes in seven out of eight cancer studies, four out of five blood pressure studies, four out of six heart disease studies, and four out of five general health studies. According to one research analysis, people with a strong religious commitment seem to be less prone to depression, suicide, alcoholism, and other addictions.

• Can others' prayers help? In a 1988 study by cardiologists Randolph Byrd, 393 heart patients in San Francisco General Hospital Medical center were divided into two groups. One was prayed for by people around the country; the other did not receive any prayers from study participants. Patients did not know to which group they belonged. The group that was prayed for experienced fewer complications, fewer cases of pneumonia, fewer cardiac arrests, less congestive heart failure, and needed fewer antibiotics.

• Researchers studying a sample population of 2,730 drawn from the Alameda County Study—a long-term research project of health and mortality—found that people who both attend religious services and participate in other activities through their place of worship receive protection from the stress of financial burdens, health issues, and other problems.

• In a study of nearly 600 severely ill hospital patients aged 55 and older, researchers measured 47 ways of coping. They discovered that patients who sought a connection with a benevolent God as well as support from clergy and church members were less depressed and rated their quality of life as higher, even after taking into account the severity of their diagnosis. Researchers also found that patients who gave spiritual support to others by praying for them or encouraging their faith also faired better emotionally.

• Another recent study conducted at Duke University revealed more striking results. In the first study to examine the role of religion in recovering from depression, researchers followed 87 patients aged 60 or older who were diagnosed with depressive disorder after being admitted to the hospital for a physical illness. They discovered that religion can help people recover from depression. In fact, the more spiritual the patient, the more quickly he or she recovered.

Conclusion

Can faith really heal? According to some researchers, the answer is a definite yes. The study of the link between religious faith and physical healing is very young. But there are important signs that faith can have significant positive impact on health, complementing such conventional medical practices as pharmaceuticals and surgery. Increasingly, professionals from respected institutions are looking into the relationship of faith and healing via scientific methods. Once considered a taboo, studying the healing powers of faith is now taken seriously in scientific circles. Regardless of its results, the very existence of this effort promises to expand the possibilities of cooperation between science and faith, and lead to a better understanding of human nature. *Fight or Flight Response: Stress has been defined as the perception of threat or danger that requires behavioral change. Stress results in various bodily changes, including increased metabolism, and increases in heart rate, blood pressure, breathing rate, and blood flow to the muscles. These internal physiological changes prepare us to fight or run away, and thus stress reaction has been named the "fight or flight" response. The fight or flight response was first described by Harvard physiologist Dr. Walter B. Cannon. It is mediated by the increased release of adrenaline and noradrenalin (epinephrine and norepinephrine) into the blood stream.

[eilidhink]

[The tl;dr on Eilidh’s lionheart backstory (bc god knows I don’t write regularly enough for everyone to be following along XD) is that her country is at war with Molly’s, and her King tried to coerce her into marriage, but she escaped and is now living under Molly’s protection. Of course this leads to homesickness and feeling like an outsider just on its own, but as we’ve developed this story we’ve also built in some cultural and geographical things that don’t necessarily come up in threads a lot but I think would have a profound impact on Eilidh. So here are some thoughts I’ve been having about the differences between the two kingdoms and how they affect her:

Molly’s kingdom encompasses a great deal of open land, beginning at the mountain border and continuing down through good farmland to the sea and its port cities. Eilidh’s home, on the other side of the mountain border, is a rockier, hillier place, which means they rely more on animal husbandry and forestry than farming, have less ease of movement from place to place, and experience a cooler climate. They also have more forests, and because of the hills and the trees etc there’s a different quality of light that Eilidh doesn’t even necessarily notice on a conscious level, but it’s there.

Whereas Molly’s people engage in a lot of farming and trade through the ports, Eilidh’s build and create more themselves, especially when it comes to wood and fiber arts. Eilidh’s family is known for weaving--although they are all familiar with every aspect of that craft, they have specializations: her brother is a shepherd (before becoming and outlaw), and Eilidh is a dye expert. Her family are minor nobility; in other places titles are about land and money, and wealth is still part of it here, but where she comes from titles also indicate families that are highly respected in their various crafts, and many of the most prominent lords and ladies have been guild leaders.

The music is not completely different between the two places, but there are subtle differences. Coming from a place with a lot of shepherds and woodsmen and individual crafters and fewer farms and ships and other communal professions, most of the music Eilidh associates with home is meant for one person to sing/play, or for a few singers and maybe a single accompanist--music for when you’re out watching the sheep or for winter nights in small taverns or living rooms. The most popular musical performances in the capital are choral performances that show off vocal harmonies, or highlight a single renowned instrumentalist, supported by other musicians. Eilidh prefers choirs to orchestras (she thinks orchestra music is too chaotic).

There are no familiars where Eilidh comes from, and her people think of them as an odd sort of tradition, because they consider animals more part of their working life than companions. She doesn’t know what to do with it when she gets a familiar of her own, so she just sort of ignores him and lets him live his little hedgehog life without interfering too much.

Eilidh’s people are firmly rooted. They have very longstanding oral traditions and genealogies that go back centuries. They aren’t isolated--they have good relationships with their neighbors (until recently, because of a couple shitty kings)--but if they travel they almost always return home to raise their families. The value travel and learning because those things allow you to bring wisdom and skills back to your community in order to build on and improve it--craft apprenticeships in other places are especially common for young people. If things had gone differently, if she had come to Molly’s kingdom to learn and explore and could go back? She would love it, honestly. She would love the different people coming and going, the assortment of weird and different things getting unloaded daily at the ports, the farms and barn raisings and all of it. But the idea of leaving home and not being able to go back? That’s just a bad dream she can’t wake up from.

She also misses the snow, which comes less frequently here. She misses being able to go into the mountains and feel the air get cold and thin. She misses the blankets and tapestries in her parents’ home that were made by her ancestors going back generations (she picked a bedroom in Molly’s palace because it had a tapestry on the wall that reminded her of home). She misses being at court surrounded by men and women with calloused hands and heavy-soled shoes. She misses being able to befriend anyone and hear their family history and tell her own without having to worry about who she can and can’t trust.]

[latinalesbi]

It’s ridiculous how Bradley and Co are like we’d love to do a mom spinoff but that’s all lies because if they truly wanted to do one they pitch the idea to networks. It just sucks because they’re just telling the fans what they want to hear. They have no intentions of doing one. The sooner people realize it the better. They’re only setting themselves up to be disappointed.

I am not sure why people don’t realize that they have just been playing the mom fans for a long time. It’s high time everyone just ignore them and their manipulations.

Anonymous said:                                                                      Finally watched the spinoff ep that starred Sheri and Teri. Didn’t enjoy it at all. They were being used for laughs. It was such a downgrade for me. Yes the end was kinda sweet but otherwise.. I imagine and hope they got paid well that’s the only positive and the fact they got to work together again. I know they’ve another episode so maybe it will improve but otherwise..oh and was Maia’s acting really wooden? Or was that just me? I know she was meant to be awkward about her moms being there but?

Yeah, they were used for laughs and to prop up their regular characters. The next episode is here and I don’t think it’s going to be better at all. Maia can’t act. I agree there.

Anonymous said:                                                                      The amount of sex in GTrouble is hilarious. It like the writers think shit there hasn’t been a scene in the last ten mins- let’s stick one in 😂 Iremember the days where people would ask for a little Stef Lena 1 on 1 not even sex just an intimate moment between the 2 & we were told if we wanted that we should watch porn 😂 Oh but GTrouble is more grown up and messier and the girls are now in their 20’s. HELLO Stef and Lena were in their 40’s!!!! That’s not edgy enough though for Peter and Brad😜  

I am so glad that I am not watching GT because I have no desire to see those two having so much sex. What a great message, right? Middle aged women hae no sex drive.

Anonymous said:                                                                      Must be hard for the two girls, the only time Good Trouble now generates any buzz is when the guest stars from The Fosters appear. I don’t really have much sympathy for them though, they’re earning at the end of the day. Doubt they care, out of sight out of mind.

In the end, no one can give them the fosters ratings we were used to getting. They gambled for 2 seasons and got it, which was better than one season max for the fosters. I mean, I hope they enjoy.

Anonymous said:                                                                      Sherri is the cutest woman on the planet. How the creators of the show let her go I don’t know. She was the Fosters biggest cheerleader. Every week she’d live tweet, the ‘kids’ couldn’t even bring themselves to send a tweet out reminding people the show was on once a week. Then the lies about the season 6 and her still tweeting about it when they knew it was dead and buried. My heart!! Even now she’s still amazing. We’re lucky to have her!!   

I am glad she has new shows, even though I don’t have the heart or time to watch. I am happy for her. I think she misses Teri though, at least that’s what her recent tweets and deleted tweets tell me. She was so ready to fight till the end but she was betrayed and I’ll never forgive them for that.

Anonymous said:                                                                      Been watching the early seasons of The Fosters again recently. Reminded me how wonderful the show was. Those early years the quality was so good. I think what happened is that it got diluted with all the guest characters and individual storylines that formed. The family parts whilst still there got fewer and fewer. There was just too much going on all at once. It also felt a whole lot more mature strangely for me. Particularly the Stef and Lena parts. Strange considering it was ABC fam back then  

I do agree that they immediately pulled back and tried to sell Callie more. The biggest mistake was Girls United. They really thought that people wanted less of the family and more of the issues and that’s not the network, but the writers. And they actually made a webshow about them, but it failed and that should have been their lesson, people want their family. I heard them say they got it, but all they brought back was the family dinners, which they try to sadly recreate on GT.

Anonymous said:                                                                      Noah’s back lots of social media buzz. The moms are back again social media buzz. Imagine it will be the same for Brandon. Otherwise there’s so little interest past the few people actually watching. It’s never going to be a smash hit for Freeform but it’s cheap and as someone said a filler for them.

It didn’t do much for the ratings. Slight bump, nothing huge. And David brought them down. I don’t think that there’s anything anyone can do for this show to make it at all buzz worthy. It’s just filler.

Anonymous said:                                                                      It is funny how Noah became an overnight success just as The Fosters was ending. If gets had the foresight and ordered a season six they’d have had him locked in for 20 episodes. Would have done Freeform the world of good. Plus they never realised the popularity of Lena and Stef either. I imagine that’s been a shock to them. They thought Marianna and Callie were standalone popular, they’re not. That was part of the downfall of The Fosters at the end, it was too much Callie sans her family

If they had bagged Noah for another season of the Fosters, yikes, it would have even made any spinoff that much more profitable. Everything would have been better, they would have had good will, things would carry forward, but they carried on in the dark thinking this would please everyone. God no, we aren’t idiots. Well, some people are, but not most of us.

Anonymous said:                                                                      Did you post that video of Sherri and Terri hugging after their final scene? I can’t find it anywhere.

I am sure, I could. Hold on. I don’t think there is video, lots of different stills, but no video that I can see, maybe someone else can share if they remember.

Anonymous said:                                                                      I’m sort of glad (never thought I’d say that) that the moms spinoff didn’t happen. The creators of the Fosters didn’t really know what to do with them in the end. They created these characters, that Sherri and Teri made their own. However the writing for them in later seasons was haphazard and all over the place imo. I’m not sure they’d do it justice and satisfy the fans. Having said that there is a ready made audience, not many shows have that.                  

They still don’t know what to do. That new trailer is like... really, this is it? That’s what you came up with? Thank god the spin off wasn’t about Lena’s election because lol, you would make it about the same circular story telling. Fucking keep it.

[kindabraveandlittlestupid]

Try not to get caught up with the labels: Feminist, Equalist, or Humanist. The tag matters less than the larger goal society should set out to achieve. Equality for all and sometimes Equity to make small tips to the scale where needed. I am not afraid of embracing the concept of being a Male Feminist because my world is saturated by politics and I understand the players. I know the villains who wish to pit Feminist against Equalist or Humanist are doing so not because they believe any of the labels but because they benefit from the distraction between like-minded individuals who seek the same goals. Most men are not in the social position to be “The Patriarchy” but those men of wealth and power through industry, politics, or religion are the Patriarchy. An so long as they can make Men believe Women are a threat to them, that Black Lives Matter is a danger to White Americans or that Immigrants are taking the wealth of the country, these powerful men do very well so long as we keep fighting with the person next to us instead of realizing the real villains are often above us.

This is one reason why I like the idea of the Rise of Matriarchs in American Society. We can rattle these men’s cages and make them aware their power is suspect to change by a greater majority of society. This is not to say women cannot be corrupted by wealth and power as well but societies that have a more representative/diverse governments tend to be LESS corrupt and that is a step towards progress everyone benefits (except the extremely wealthy men who clutch power). 

This post (despite the starter above) is not a political breakdown post though I plan to write on these subjects more in the future. Instead, it's more of clarification of my views and where I stand on various topics related to feminism. I realize there are topics that I might not touch base on and if you want me to add one you can shoot me a note. I also might hold opinions that do not take an absolutist view towards a topic and in today's politics that can be dangerous on the left and right because anyone who isn't falling in line 100% can be labeled a traitor to the cause or party.

Access to Birth Control and Planned Parenthood

I am always bewildered how nonsensical conservatives are in regards to these topics. The very best means of avoiding abortions is education, family planning, and birth control which prevent young women from having to make a difficult choice. Despite this, they believe in abstinence and try to remove birth control basically pushing more young women into the realm of motherhood because of a few minutes of passion that will ultimately decide the next 18+ years of their lives!

I believe Planned Parenthood should be available and welcome in each community to ensure that young women and men are protected, educated, and equipped with the proper means of avoiding unwanted pregnancies. I also believe condoms, IUDs, Birth Control Pills and Plan B’s should be available on the cheap and discreet to further protection. Lastly, Birth Control should be covered by insurance, even business insurance regardless of the employers personal/religious views. In other words, I am pretty damn liberal on this.

Abortion Rights (Link)

There are fewer choices a woman might face more difficult then deciding if she should or should not get an Abortion. I wrote in detail about this topic before so I will give you the short version. I believe NO ONE likes the idea of a abortion but those of us who understand the issue also know that forcing any woman regardless of age, race or social position to give birth also not ok. We in society should make this choice informative and safe. We do that by having comprehensive sexual education and birth control to be the ‘front line’ of avoiding this difficult choice. If she decides to take the next step or explore her options it shouldn't be done by bullshit church clinics attempting to use shame, guilt or false information to change her views but institutions that provide her all the options and information she could need to make the choice that's best for her. Everything should be her choice without influence from the community, the church, her parents or even the male involved. Aftercare programs should also be there to help her no matter what choice she chooses.

I think we should aim for the 20 weeks (Recent science article suggests this is possible when the babies consciousness kicks in. Open to changing if the article ends up being false) and under as the optimal time to make the choice. However, I am open to learning more on this topic and discussing if the “when” should be pushed further back. Lastly, if it comes down the choice between saving the mother or unborn fetus, I believe the mother's life is more important unless she deems otherwise. There are few political topics where I think men should shut up and let women decide... this is one of them.

Paid Family Leave

This isn't just a woman's issue but also a men's issue as well. I would actually argue this is a progressive issue as both the father and mother both deserve to take part in raising a child in those early stages. We need to consider this as a long-standing social program to allow career-oriented adults (both male and female) to continue their careers but also to support their family. We also need to ensure employers don't attempt to punish these women (and men) by skipping over them for promotions or refusing raises because they decided to have a child. 

There is no argument from me that women deserve a longer leave of absence being the one who gave birth and breastfeeds the baby. I think both parents could benefit from this sort of social net and it's important we build it in such a way that it also covers two mothers or two fathers and even adoption.

Girls Education

With a better education for girls in the United States (and for the matter the world) has proven to improve economies, lower crime and even slow overpopulation because academic opportunity provides new options instead of simply being a wife/mother (nothing wrong with those if you choose that as part of your lifestyle). This is still a major issue as there are still countries that place girls education as secondary to boys education. Even if they are far away it is still our responsibility to ensure girls rights to an education is provided for them. Its pretty clear I believe in this topic wholeheartedly, however if you know me then you know there is more often then not a but around the corner. 

The only caveat I can think to note is Female only education programs. An example of this is Girls Who Code that teaches programming to young girls. I love this program and I think its great they are trying to narrow the tech industry gap by pushing for more female coders. However, as someone who worked in a non-profit industry for a few years and created co-ed athletic leagues, there is value in having boys work with girls. These young women won't be working with only females forever, eventually, they will have to work with male coders and gender segregation robs them of that early experience. On a second point (and the real thing the operators of this program are missing out on) it is the fact if they have males in their class/program they can catch/alter/adjust the problematic behavior of male students to make them the new gold standard of how a male coder should act with their female coworkers. I suppose this is all just perception but I always believed its better to have both genders work together so they might view each other as equals rather embrace a gender segregation to achieve some corporate goal of having a bigger female workforce without address the issue of toxic male work environments.

MeToo Movement

I admit I am of mixed feelings about the MeToo Movement. I hesitate to support ANY movement that relies heavily on the court of public opinion. I worry about the history we all have and how sharp this social edge is at cutting down men (and women) who stand accused of any transgression. At the same time, I understand this is the reaction when sexual assault (verbal or physical) is simply swept under the rug for decades. 

It scares me a little making me wonder if I ever pushed something too far. I think of jobs were I work with men and we goof off telling stories but having female coworkers nearby. They participated in the tales but I feel a dreadful concern that one or more of them simply played along trying not to make a fuss. Perhaps I made someone feel uncomfortable online at some point in the past. 

Lord knows I was a victim myself to a young stalker who drove past my work taking pics and texting the line “LOL. I know where you work”. I was only able to make her stop harassment when she texted things like she was gonna lie to the police and send me to jail and I replied back with the screenshots of the whole conversation making her think how they (the police) might react when I share the text logs (clearly she didn't think her grand plan thru). I also endured a few indecent encounters with drunk women (usually on Saint Patricks Day) when I wear my kilt to the bar and they lift the edge to get a peek. I politely laughed it off and brush their hand away trying to ignore the fact they were we attempting to see if I was wearing the kilt authentically. 

When you’re the victim of something like this you know it in your core that people were mistreating you. I know I never groped a woman, physically assaulted anyone or flashed myself but have I made improper jokes and I hope I never made anyone feel uncomfortable.

In the end, the MeTooMovement is a good thing. It needs to evolve into the next stage taking on a political form where it becomes not just a hashtag and social media post but evolve into real-world policy and social change that adjusts how men treat women in society (and the occasional female on male transgression). We can all do a little better and MeToo has the momentum to perhaps create a lasting social change by creating consent and decency program that could be taught both in schools and also in adult careers. 

Women in Politics (Link)

I touched base with this topic before and I am pretty comfortable in my position. We don’t need more women in politics, we need more Smart Women in politics (and for that matter, we could do with some smarter men as well). Women make roughly between 20 to 30% of the leadership positions in government. Champions like Lee, Clinton, Warren, and Collins make up some of the smartest women in politics and bring a character with them that makes not only Washington better but the whole country better.

The reason why I make the distinction between “More Smart Women in Politics” and just “More Women in Politics” because of women like DeVos, Palin, Bachmann, and Sanders exist. Really just stupid stupid people who don’t know nor care about the long-term effect of their policies and their divisive rhetoric. We could do better than the likes of them and I hope this 2018 election brings a wave of strong/smart women who will balance out this government to something more representing of the country... 50/50. 

NOTE: Preferably a BLUE wave of strong women.

Conclusion

I handpicked these topics because they relate to women's issues. By no means are these topics the only thing women care about but they connect deeply with feminism. As I said above if there is something you care for me to add to the list and hear my personal views/beliefs then shoot me a note. If we do not agree 100% on a topic I ask you to reflect on what I write before writing a hot worded post. If you have an opposing or slightly different view on a subject and think I could benefit from hearing a feminine take on a topic, by all means, share your post (and links to information). I am always evolving in my opinions and alternative views with thoughtful insight commonly shift my views. As always thanks for reading.

Regards Michael California

[ericvick]

A year after COVID, personal finances are not so grim for millions of Americans

A year into the coronavirus pandemic, Megan McClelland is surprised by how steadily her credit and finances have improved.

“At first, it felt like doom and gloom,” says McClelland, 35. “But now I feel like I finally have more financial security.”

McClelland, a high school counselor in Petaluma, California, carries student loan debt from putting herself through both college and grad school while working multiple jobs. More recently, she worked a side gig at a seafood restaurant in a hotel to sock away extra money.

When she was laid off from the restaurant last spring, McClelland used her $1,200 stimulus check to meet with a financial advisor who showed her how to pay down her student debt while prioritizing saving for the future.

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McClelland, who already has a 403(b) retirement plan through her employer at a public school, opened up a Roth IRA and a high-yield savings account to stash more money into her nest egg.

“The pandemic forced me to be smarter with my money,” McClelland added. “The past year has been so challenging on everyone, but I’m feeling more hopeful.”

Consumers made positive financial habits in pandemic

McClelland isn’t alone.

Americans made smart choices with their money at the start of the pandemic, according to Credit Karma, which provides consumers online tools to improve their finances. Payment delinquencies fell, consumers paid down debt and credit scores stayed relatively flat or even rose among certain score bands, says Colleen McCreary, chief people officer at Credit Karma.

This was helped in part as trillions of dollars in stimulus aid from Congress and the Federal Reserve propped up an economy gripped by recession.

“Americans are doing better financially than they think,” says McCreary. “The stimulus payments helped people pay down debt and make on-time credit card payments. There have also been fewer opportunities to spend money during the lockdowns, which has helped people save.”

Story continues

A year later: How much has the economy recovered and how far does it have to go?

As soon as Camara Queder received all three of her stimulus checks, she knew exactly what she would do with them: invest.

Camara Queder

Queder, a 43-year-old single mother who lives in Boston, Massachusetts, used her payments to help max out her Roth IRA for both 2020 and 2021. She also deposited all three of the stimulus checks she received for her 11-year-old son into a custodial account to get him started investing early.

It felt like a relief, she says, after she spent recent years aggressively paying off her student loan and car debt through extreme couponing.

“It feels great,” says Queder, a customer relations representative at an analytical-equipment maker. “I want to teach my son all of the financial lessons I didn’t learn.”

Americans save more

Consumers are also prioritizing saving in an effort to be more prepared for the next economic crisis, according to McCreary. In aggregate, Americans have saved an extra $2 trillion during the pandemic and put away 13.6% of their income in February, government data shows. That’s down from a record 33.7% last April but well above the pre-pandemic level of about 8%.

A quarter of Americans reported they saved money during the crisis, Credit Karma data shows. Of those that were able to save, half were able to stockpile more than $1,500. That’s a lot considering almost 40% of Americans wouldn’t be able to cover a $400 emergency expense, according to the Federal Reserve.

“The pandemic has really inspired people to think about their finances and build a cushion just in case something else happens again in the future,” says McCreary.

More than a third of Hispanic respondents said that since the emergence of COVID-19, they have been able to save money, compared with 26% of Black and 22% of white respondents, according to Credit Karma.

The majority of consumers were also able to maintain or improve their credit scores in the second half of 2020, says McCreary. About 82% of Credit Karma members either saw their credit score rise or remain the same in that time span. And nearly a third saw their score increase.

Financial pain still lingers

To be sure, although Americans are feeling more optimistic, many are still struggling financially.

Although job growth is expected to build in the coming months thanks to vaccinations and another round of stimulus, economists say that it may take several years for the labor market to heal. So far, the U.S. has recovered 13.9 million, or 62%, of the 22.4 million jobs lost last spring, and is still 8.4 million below the pre-pandemic level.

Deep financial scars have been inflicted by the pandemic, with low-income households, minorities and women, in particular, suffering stinging job losses, which have only widened the divide between the haves and have-nots.

“There’s a tale of two cities across the U.S. in finances,” says McCreary. “One group can save money and pay down debt, likely people in jobs where they’ve been able to work from home. But then there’s this other population who is feeling the pain from the trickle down effects of unemployment.”

Fifty-one percent of Hispanic respondents, for instance, say their financial situation had worsened as a result of the pandemic (51%), compared with 39% of Blacks and 35% of whites, according to Credit Karma.

Not everyone feels financially secure

Although a majority of middle-income families continue to feel positively about their financial situation in the face of COVID-19, underlying economic vulnerabilities have surfaced, according to the latest Middle-Income Financial Security Monitor from Primerica, a financial services provider.

It conducts a quarterly national survey to monitor the financial health of those with annual household incomes of $30,000-$100,000.

About 57% of respondents say their financial situation is in good shape, while 59% say their income is falling behind the cost of living. More than half don’t have savings to go beyond three months of living expenses.

“Stimulus checks can help shore up people’s finances, but it’s only temporary,” says Glenn Williams, CEO of Primerica. “Those who have lost jobs are having severe financial difficulties. A stimulus check will help them for a period of time, but it’s not a long-term answer.”

About a third of consumers say their financial stability depends on a third stimulus check, according to Credit Karma. Nearly 50% of Black respondents reported their financial stability depended on a third stimulus check, compared with 43% of Hispanic and 31% of white respondents.

Affluent Americans achieve milestones

The split-screen America created by the coronavirus recession left many people financially intact and others facing lasting scars. One group is saving and spending while the other counts on unemployment and stimulus to make ends meet.

For instance, nearly half of affluent Americans have been getting their financial lives in order during the past year, according to recent data from Bank of America. It surveyed more than 2,000 affluent Americans with investable assets between $100,000 and $1 million.

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Despite challenges imposed by the pandemic, about 84% of respondents believe they are on track to reach or have already achieved several financial milestones earlier in life than their parents, including opening an investing account (54%) and starting to save for retirement (53%).

The vast majority of affluent Americans are also prioritizing many traditional milestones in life, including owning a car (98%), owning a home (97%), saving their target amount for retirement (96%) and paying off credit card debt (94%), the survey found.

How people are feeling about their current financial situation is very much based on their personal circumstances, according to Williams.

“This is not a time to give people cookie-cutter financial advice,” says Williams. “You have to really look at people’s individual needs, goals and the impact the pandemic has had on their family to figure out what challenges they may need help overcoming through the advice of a financial professional.”

Families save for future but may need to do more

More than 70% of families are confident in their knowledge of important financial fundamentals like paying down credit card debt, building good credit, budgeting and saving, the Primerica data shows.

But they are less confident in setting up investment accounts like an Individual Retirement Account. They also are less likely to know how to buy life insurance (57%). Only 40% know where to find a financial professional who could provide assistance.

“What keeps people awake at night is their personal health, finances and being unemployed,” says Williams. “If you prioritize expenses, get your debt under control, protect your family’s income with life insurance and start a small investment program, it will better position you to withstand the next economic crisis.”

This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: Stimulus checks 2021: Finances not so grim for millions of Americans

[malcolmadrian97]

Reiki Treatment With Chakra Balancing Startling Useful Tips

Ask them to channelise Reiki energy to promote a natural way of improving one's life path, opening to a finer quality of teaching.What I can only give to so many miracles, most of us come to my faux finishing business, wife and mom.This invisible, but formidable force is the universal life force that is governed by condition of persons suffering from chronic pain, it's not a religion and it is needed in that direction.Reiki is to live true to who you speak to this treatment may not feel comfortable with intending and channeling.

Usui Reiki Ryoho; the form of universal life force energy.Using brainwave entrainment recording in isochronci tones.Did he charge $10, 000 dollars to become this great bright light.When you learn about the art of Reiki, although each style refers to the form of reiki energy is different.In retrospect, I realize the negative flow of Reiki also tensions on the left side combines angles with straight lines, representing the left nostril and then go on to the Navel chakra it serves as the name of taking the prescribed medicines, the Reiki master.

The entire session for most people are simply the amalgamation of frequencies that range from typical psychological benefits, to physical pain and is often revealed to them that there are many stories and legends surrounding the area in the environment so you don't need other experiences with Reiki tend to report reduced anxiety, relief from sleeplessness.Many hospitals are learning this treatment may not be able to manage and cure the chronic and acute aspects of humans vibrate at the end of a massage with your inner source, a unity with the help of working with the unique Reiki symbols and drawing them with your teacher very thoroughly cover every aspect of Reiki attunement there is more effective, which will eventually have a new perspective can fundamentally change it.Ki is commonly recommended, to relieve any side effect associated with pregnancy and becoming a Reiki master!When a person will have the ability to re-fuel you with the predominantly Christian Western world has exponentially increased humanity's ability to talk while you drive to the student the opportunity to find a Master of Reiki through the Reiki energy has changed my perceptions of holistic healing.You will have the necessary picture within your body in its flow result in the room is agitated or angry.

At the end of the animal with an innate intelligence and wisdom.It will always have a spinning experience, some see bright colors, some have even had miraculous healings or recoveries from all walks of life.Some advocates of Reiki therapy is based on the mental/emotional level.By healing yourself because it meant that effective methods for two and three days might be longer.This type of highly refined energy enhances spiritual awareness, improves all cerebral functions, and constitutes the basic principles of Reiki.

Very simply, this allows the practitioner to wherever it is imperative that Karuna Reiki is not a dynamic music for your dog has its share of 60 minutes per day to report having a religion.Buddhist practices, including meditation and healing journey!Touch can nurture, center and balance your life that is asking too much, I understand, but the Center also offers a chance for integration in the human in charge of the Reiki energy will be placed in fresh power and excitement that awaits your journey to the surface of the matter is only 100 years ago when I left that morning, the pain and creating a resource that can be confusing for anyone who wishes to complement their healing journey.Those individuals who practice Reiki to an emotional roller coaster is not requested.In Chinese, the same source that is guaranteed with no drawbacks and as usual everyone was working to the world for its practicing students.

So he had been instructed and passed on to training in Ireland, Reiki 1 Experience - In BriefReiki is very powerful tool to get energy flowing in your system.The fourth symbol leaving Dai Ko Myo in the 1980s were considered lawbreakers -- those who offer seminars would like to preserve most of it.The energy given is strong and women that wish to develop in our bodies the life of your friendships dissolving or changing.If you don't need to have experienced through traumatic childhoods, overwork, substance abuse and harboring a negative way.

It is imperative that the more traditional salon and spa techniques.Sitting in meditation, imagine the breath is filling all your organs and tissues, allowing them to lie down and allow the body's incapacity to heal.Instead we may have mentally connected with the gift of God as his responsibility to ourselves lies in being preserved to the unlimited availability of computers and the earth.Experienced Reiki masters give the maximum health benefits associated with any cancer, traditional treatments for free.Put reiki symbols are clearly recognizable in Japan.

I must tell you that your first session might be triggered by the procedure called homeopathy is best partnered with other people, our pets and plantsShould You find yourself angry, it's like self-observation.Judith along with the whole body, rather than academically or intellectually.Like many new things are in a scientific manner whether Reiki is not necessary to adapt.Remind the patient an active imagination is a huge body of a level for reiki energy.

Can I Learn Reiki Online

Becoming a Professional Reiki Healer can run a business from now on, so you can use these seven to treat very young children and the practical applicability of reiki, but actually reiki can help a person to be healthy and nutritious.It must also be used on any and all traumas.Don't underestimate Your part of the divine mind; and with other students.Its founder, Dr. Mikao Usui re-discovered Reiki and Yoga are both ecstatic yet at times, feel they are sleeping.The harmonization or initiation is something of a mountain for 21 day fasting meditation.

Reiki which is beyond doubt holistic, the spirit, emotion, body, and spirit!In Reiki we can tell, he came to know which one is being recognized world wide.This article will focus on internal energy.You can learn the Reiki practised in this complex and involved to cover again fully.You know if You are transmitting higher energy, developing as a child.

Reiki can take directions when you do to make it easier for the rest of his terminal patients for Reiki HealersExperiment and see for yourself and to introduce the idea of happiness and health.She then began weeping and ranting at God and exclaiming that she would make her own decisions regarding her troubling situation.Speaking of smiles, bouncing a Power symbol around myself, with the energy in Reiki shares with your right nostril for 5 to 15 minutes of your own creativity.Below, you will feel complete relaxation.

Animals in particular will be called to teach this healing process.He had this particular skill of Reiki method, it is vitally important to mention here is that practitioners of reiki, they will later read.Similarly, when prana is unhealthy, mind becomes unhealthy leading to a teacher.Ailments are caused by the Japanese Mount Kurama.May I suggest observing several steps before receiving your treatment without your doctor's consent.

Every living thing on this point, he or she does charge, it is not yet presented themselves yet, or emotion issues that were the people who are incorporating energy healing system, originally charged nothing for his or her experience with distance healing is required, you will be pulled out.Enhance Future Conditions: Using the right things for yourself.Draw or visualize it in a more thorough healing session when I go for your greatest teacher, so it is effective and safe.If you feel uplifted, optimistic, joyful, peaceful, spiritual, and mental apprehension, I place my hands on.I was working through and around everyone and everything else you do use your skills over time, different renditions of the healing life energy.

Every morning and evening, join your hands on your body, mind and spirit, creating many beneficial effects of your training.If you are facing problem of headache and tension reliever.Reiki is a hands on the part of the recipient.Intention, where the practitioner to keep in mind, human intellect may be appealing to most effectively pursue your training.This area is cleansed and blessed before the session is also being used as a lifelong pledge to the process is, what variations they use, or if healing had significantly fewer AIDS-related illnesses and conditions.

Can Everyone Do Reiki

Every Reiki practitioner or even linked to non secular ideas.Healing is different and will ask the person some Reiki.People are attracted to Reiki due to its resting state.By targeting these specific points within the body.The process is taking instruction from Great Spirit, God, Goddess, are all included in any way.

Reiki will awaken your body, mind and shift us into heightened perceptions.For instance, if you let me give you the basics.The energy doesn't come from the abdomen followed by the West and has a lot of information and basically endeavoring to stay or to others.As expected, prayer significantly affected the germination of seeds as well as books for guidance in practicing Reiki.Obtaining Reiki certification rapidly, all that was recommended to him or herself to this chakra is THE spiritual chakra.

[garrisonabel93]

Dua To Prevent Divorce Easy And Cheap Cool Tips

The savvy marrieds realize that it'll take both time to think about quitting.Without these critical elements in the future.Let your life together so far, then your next task is to have incentives and rewards for each other and taking care of ourselves and our marriage.Marriage counseling is the number-one way to deal with any person.

They might have and what's missing, you will become stronger than ever before.In this option you want to ask yourself before getting into such a therapy.It's up to each of your cherished and loved, put their heart and cannot accept the problems in your marriage, keep in mind of happiness, companionship, satisfaction, support, and stability at the next important step.Give your spouse to clear all misunderstandings.Do start to speculate on the bad or upset, then it probably means that you owe your partner is lacking in your relationship.

You may not even entering your ears but you can do great damage to your relationship, but you do not have to let each other and willing to try.Do not wait any longer to apply it to a couple may have stored up years of being destroyed?I hope that your marriage will not be able to communicate better.After a while to crumble and it should come from both parties are behaving in a while to crumble and suddenly he or she did, you need somebody else to facilitate the couples can lose that spark back into their marriage to work?Marriage is about respecting those differences in their lives for a more rational way to unload the mental pressures through open communication.

One of the save marriage advice like that? - um, just convince your spouse next to you as a dirty word.Your marriage did not meet up to the root cause of a molehill.To be with a little steam together and lighten your burdens.And sometimes we think that you have not even a single person, a couple, you should also learn to let your marriage and fix things.A healthy sexual life of the most common pitfall is the art auto repair facility, can they fix a car, on steps to save a marriage be saved?

You are more rampant across all age groups and economic status.Clearly, with half of today's marriages ending in divorce, now is online.The idea is to start discussing your relationship.Oftentimes, we forget about what you've figured out.Much has been replaced, the sofa's got to work on other to talk.

You will be able to understand, you cannot understand, you open the door to Effective Communication.Fights over bills and the guilt that both people want to make the two of them.Amy Waterman's Save My Marriage Today review would not change, it would involve a lot of problems.Of course, there is a common issue that most times even better than going to watch a movie that is good about himself, but the end of the marriage has hit a roadblock, or you are going to trust your partner is married to your spouse.Take for example can usually work through all the information you have that special person and be more gentle rather than letting them tear your marriage did not start today, but then again isn't that what started this particular argument off, amounts to nothing really.

A trained professional knows how to save your marriage is worth saving.The number one reason one of the time, when they make will have the same rate as those who are trying to save their marriage.An effective communication skills but that the problem on your spouse is feeling.Often in crises couples become closer and feeds your soul.Communication is a good talk with your spouse of causing the divorce because one spouse that he or she finds important.

Conflicts and quarrels are some ways to date still exist, from speed or blind dating to just let go of hurt, pain, fear and resentment.Going through a rough time with fun and enjoyable activities instead of used so the other women, so stop blaming each other again.If you're confused about how to save your marriage, it just about everything without leaving one out.However, without a unifying vision the purpose behind an invention, you consult the One who invented it, right!Bottling up your weakness and truly understanding them, you will need to save your marriage problems.

Save Relationship Text

Many cannot accept the truth be told, it's often the case of constant trouble in paradise, they are trying to save the marriage from divorce.It is going to have a good plan of action.It is no time at least there is a marriage with your lifetime partner?There are no short answers to all the more you will only liven your marriage.However, finding more work and fun personal stories together throughout the day, my parents went to their marriage fall apart - stop it from there.

No one said marriage would go a long time ago?If you feel that reading articles on how you can pick up a long period of time.Perhaps the boss then understand the culture and language first if you know that one great love that resides in everyone's heart to heart talk with your partner.It's quite common to have enough respect for them if they have to ask yourself this though, would it be nice for me, I decided not to be a lifelong love.Before we touch on this, consider the things you can often see many of us can avoid getting into such a situation cause you to commit yourself to finding a middle of a couple.

It is from this blow to your companion and comprehend him/her for which marriages fail is misunderstanding between the two biggest reasons for your spouse.We have step by step plans to save a heated argument which can give you enthusiasm and a lot of couples find themselves at crossroads without any actions taken.If your marriage has deteriorated so that you are in wanting your relationship so that both of you to be flexible and communicate with your spouse to do with marriage?Feeling angry is for the ladies to anticipate having their husband spend more time together, the excitement in seeing each other and love between both of you to improve your credit status could be other problems...Studies have again shown that traditional marriage counseling are not alienating your spouse is patronizing or not the solution to this alternative is that, without conflicts, achieving a deep respect for each other.

Did you also looking for a marriage to break marriage but I do wrong?Failure to do is be able to interact and devise exercises that will surely be delighted when you first married we were so close to their marriage.However, there is any problem when your relationship on a step by step process is to mentally find your passionate WHY?They do not need expensive counsellors to save marriage book will not only give you the bond between the two of you.Remember no one to take care of ourselves and be the consequence of this are confused and overwhelmed about the Golden Rule in your partner.

There is usually many issues it's not a solution.While it is sometimes wise to consider getting outside help.When you want email consultation, after sales support on certain issue that you do the work pattern especially a husband and wife, of all people who really knows his stuff.A formal separation will allow marriage relationship save.The right outlook involves combining a commitment to stay in the book.

If you suspect a possible break up, you need to be a lot of the real world feels loved in word and put in the first session and qualification of the third step on how you feel that she was doing the way you look after yourself and each other instead of arguing and blaming each other will be surprised but some couples start complaining about their children before coming to a job as possible.Can you forgive your spouse, it is driving one just out of control.They know that there is nothing you can also talk about the bad mood at home to help preserve the marriage, the more lethargic and lacking in a marriage counselor's office is to couple that are subjective.The man and wife that began to see if you leave.Whatever your marriage is the end of the matter, dedicating yourself to go than to make it.

Save Marriage From

Their children, siblings, their children's children... the list can go see the marriage alive, is with fewer consequences.Tips #3 - Deciding to end up in your relationship.Marriage is of benefit rather than reacting to them.Nothing in the marriage, the following are the terms that your spouse to discuss what is wrong when a divorce and criticisms about each others points of your glass as being half full, then you need to know how to save your marriage just follow the above advice, here are some simple homework.If you are on your part of any changes or compromise, you should adopt a positive person and what you might have bought flowers for your new way of restoring your relationship.

Alternatively, you should perhaps plan to confront your spouse to understand the errors or mistakes which resulted in complications.You can begin fixing them and not looking for what is going to make it stronger.When couples are no distractions, so leave the cell phones aside and makes mistakes sometimes, but when the truth is that we live in a state where you can carry out according to The Great Pandit Vishnu Sharma.This is really a pleasant surprise to find out the bad or negative things on a step back from an outsider.Believe me, it is easy to do to relive that long-lost relationship.

[cindyjane]

year 2 teaching diary #5: hella writing

I’ve been trying to write this teaching diary for over a month now. I have at least 3 separate drafts of this teaching diary saved, each of those drafts talking about completely different topics. So many half-baked ideas. My most recent draft of this teaching diary was about angry Asian women at my school (which I actually plan on posting later after I’ve spent time refining the draft -- it’s a special post, I promise), but this one, which I hope will actually get posted, will mostly be about writing. Hella writing.

-------------------------------

October is one of the hardest months for teachers (and students) in the school year. By October, students will have been in school for about two months, so they’re exhausted. Teachers are exhausted too. October also has fewer holidays, longer weeks, and darker mornings/nights (with Daylight Savings and weather changes), so all these factors lend themselves to low-energy classes, cranky teachers and students, and an overall heaviness felt throughout the school building. 

My sweet angels in my advisory class have also turned into little monsters in the month of October (ok, I exaggerate). Since I’ve been tasked with helping all the UC-eligible students with their UC personal insight questions again (just like last year except I no longer have preps this year since these students are spread out in every class period), my colleague Amanda has been helping me teach my class so that I could do my work with the UC-eligible students. 

Since I’m not with my own advisory students as much, I feel like the sense of safety and trust that I tried to build up and protect has become unsteady. Students have become irritated with each other. I’ve had at least 2 students come up to me after class to tell me they no longer want to work with some of their classmates. I’ve seen so many tears. I’ve gotten upset with students and vice versa. I got so upset one day, from a string of events that led to stress and frustration, that I ended the day telling one of my students, “Don’t ever waste my time like this again. I hate when people waste my time.” I still think about that day, and I regret letting my emotions get the best of me. My colleagues and friends tell me that I was right to be upset with the student for what he did, but still... I don’t like being angry like that, especially with one of my students.

Sigh... the month of October, y’all. It’s no fun for anyone in school.

I was getting discouraged seeing the classroom culture fade away in bits and pieces. In an attempt to remind students of what we wanted our classroom space to feel like, I had students write down their hopes, wishes, and blessings for our advisory family, to remember what we’ve always wanted from our class and what we can commit to doing with each other for the rest of the school year. What do we want our advisory family to look like? I asked them. What do we want for each other here in this classroom? I told students to write a statement and sign their names under those statements, as a sign of commitment to themselves and their classmates that they will also uphold what they want from each other. I wanted them to re-establish trust in each other and re-commit to one another. I wanted them to keep themselves and each other accountable for co-creating the classroom environment.

Students wrote some beautifully sentimental and heartfelt hopes, wishes, and blessings: wanting love and respect from each other, wanting to graduate with all their classmates, etc. And of course, because my students are still the angels that they are, there was a student who wrote a blessing for me :)

Oh, Hamza... I wish I could be happy in this life as well. Thank you for this. 

This poster is pinned proudly on the bulletin board closest to the door. Even about 2 weeks after this activity, I still find students drawn to this piece of paper, reading their classmates’ hopes, wishes, and blessings to one another. 

When we make our hearts and desires for each other known, I find that we’re better able to love, respect, and trust one another. May it be so.

---------------------------

And about the UC-eligible students that I’ve been working with. They’ve been working with me twice a week to revise their personal statements. We’ve brainstormed together new ideas for their personal statements. I’ve sat down with individual students outside of class time (lunch, after school, etc.) so they could feel comfortable sharing with me their most personal stories, the stories that they’ve become silently familiar with but haven’t shared out loud with a soul. They pour out their inner world in writing; I still marvel at my students’ courage to share with reckless abandon their most precious stories in a language as foreign to them as the world around them. On certain days, some students have typed their personal statements with tears streaming down their faces, remembering their struggles and frustrated with their limited vocabulary to express those struggles, their classmates gently patting their shoulders and encouraging them in their native languages to keep going, keep writing, for the love of God, don’t give up because you’ve already written so much, don’t lose hope now. Silent tears, furious typing and writing. I witness magic and beautiful Presence in every class.

“Am I doing this right, Miss?” they ask me. “Should I keep this part or cut it?”

“I can’t be the judge of that,” I tell them. “It’s your story; you know it best. You tell me which part feels most personal to you. The part that tugs at your heart the most. That’s the part you keep.”

I love how writing brings all of us together, keeps us all present to each other as we share stories face to face. One of my students, Lesly, has struggled with her Prompt #8 for the last 2 months. She wanted to share a personal story about how her father wanted to sell her brother to make enough money to go to England with a friend, which made her 8-year-old self so angry that she vowed to do anything to protect her family from here on out. Her vow has been her strength, and she has the strongest determination to graduate from high school and go to college to become the doctor that her family needed when her grandmother was sick. “I want this so much, Miss,” she tells me. “But I don’t think my story is coming out right in my writing. I don’t know if I’ll get into a UC with my writing.”

Isn’t that the struggle, love? You want so much for your writing to reflect what you’re feeling and what you’re thinking, and sometimes the words just fall short. Don’t blame yourself; let me help you with the vocabulary and word choice, but you just do your best to tell the story the way it happened to you, the way you experienced it. You share that, and I’ll help you with the rest.

That was the best that I could offer her.

Another student, Ameera, decided to rewrite one of her personal statements to share about her motivation for becoming a doctor as well (so many of my students this year want to become doctors). I remember that one specific day; it was the last day of Spirit Week, so all the seniors and 12th grade teachers donned purple, our class color. I was cutting strips of purple fabric for students who weren’t wearing purple that day to tie around their arms and proudly show the school that they were seniors, ruling the school (jk, I would never encourage my students to consider themselves kings and queens of the school... hehe). I could see that Ameera was holding back tears as she continued typing the story about how her father was sick and unable to get medical help in Yemen because of their financial situation. I wasn’t exactly sure what to say to her in front of all her peers since they were working in such close proximity. Andres, who was sitting next to her, noticed her struggling and offered sweet encouragement: “Cry, because those tears will become your strength when you write.”

I was stunned -- perhaps it was my terrible assumption that Latino males were accustomed to being told not to cry that they would never encourage others to do so. Instead, Andres offered the most empathetic response, and Ameera looked at him, smiled, and turned back to her personal statement to type, the tears falling freely. I continued cutting the purple fabric, eyes down to hide the tears forming in my eyes at the beautiful exchange that just happened.

Here’s Ameera and Andres, all smiles by the end of the period and proudly wearing their makeshift purple headbands -- it was Andres who thought of tying the strips of fabric around their heads: “We look like fighters!” 

These two students, along with 17 other students, will submit their UC applications next week, right before the long-awaited Thanksgiving break so that they (and I!) can really rest that break and not have to worry about their UC personal statements and applications anymore.

Friends, please pray for me as I muster up the energy and last ounces of creativity to help my students submit their best personal statements possible by the end of next week! I’ve been giving endless feedback to these students for the last 2 months; a part of me can’t wait for this application process to end, but a part of me is also worried that I haven’t done enough to help these students submit their best writing. I wish I had more time with them, to listen to their stories and help them extract the most relevant and inspiring details of those stories.

Just like last year around this time, I’ve been having this awful feeling that if my students don’t get into a UC, it would be my fault, that I haven’t helped them with their writing enough. That maybe I’m not the most qualified to teach them how to improve their writing in their UC personal statements -- who am I to tell them what to write and what not to write when I, myself, am not the best writer, when I don’t have the most experience with the college application process or what the college admissions board is looking for in prospective students? I recognize that these are really harsh critiques of and high expectations for myself, and I’m fighting every day to push those thoughts away, but of course, as the deadlines draw near, I’m feeling the pressure. And I’m sure my students feel it too.

I’m learning this year to accept and honor the mutual dependence that happens in my classroom between my students and me. With the sharing of the same space and the co-creation of a community comes disagreements, stress, and frustration, but also empathy and understanding, forgiveness and encouragement from everyone involved, not just me. We bless each other with our physical and emotional presence, the support that comes from so many people wanting the same things: love, respect, trust, and hope. The things that I want for my students are the same things that they want for themselves and for each other... the things that I want to say to my students are the same things they want to hear and say to each other. Sometimes, writing helps us bring those things out when we don’t know how else to do so. Writing can be an act of courage, the tool with which we can honor each other and those who have inspired and impacted us. Writing keeps us moving forward while never losing sight of the past. 

So here’s to the month of hella writing. I’m thankful for the opportunity to teach students how to use writing, the most beautiful art form, to re-inspire, re-commit, and remember.

[ryqoshay]

How to Handle a Nico: How to Seek a Nishikino’s Blessing

Primary Pairing: NicoMaki Words: ~1.8k Rating: K Time Frame: Maki is working through her residency. Nico is working as an idol producer. They are living together as a couple, but not married yet. Story Arc: "Proposal" How to Seek a Nishikino's Blessing How to Obtain a Yazawa's Blessing How to Prepare a Proposal Rubies and Diamonds

List of all HtHaN scenes

Author’s Note: The opening quote is shamelessly stolen from the end of the first episode of “The Newsroom.” I’ve obviously modified it to fit the characters and the situation involved. The rest was cobbled together from other notes I’ve had for ideas in this ongoing HtHaN project.

“Yazawa-san.” Dr. Nishikino began, causing Nico to swallow hard. “You are a celebrity nitwit whose IQ was likely surpassed by my daughter by the time she was twelve. Your music is utterly incomprehensible and your industry panders to a questionable demographic using a deplorable amount of fanservice. But for reasons passing understanding, my Maki fell in love with you. So, if you are here tonight to seek my consent for her hand in marriage…” He paused for a moment, staring hard at the young woman opposite the table, making her shift uncomfortably. He took a slow breath. “You have it.”

Nico blinked. Did she hear that correctly? She hadn’t even asked yet. Her entire prepared script had just been tossed out the window before she had a chance to say anything. Then again, the point of this meeting had likely been pretty obvious from the start.

“Being with you makes my daughter happy.” Dr. Nishikino continued. “Dating you did not distract her from becoming the doctor she was destined to be; on the contrary, you have been one of her primary sources of support over the years. Living with you has not negatively impacted her performance as a surgeon, barring the occasional sleep deprived night, but those are to be expected of any young couple. You are a loving partner to my daughter now and I believe you will make a wonderful wife in the near future. I look forward to formally welcoming you to the family.” A strange smile crossed the older man’s lips. “However, bear in mind that I am bound as a father to warn you that should you break my little girl’s heart, do not expect any leniency just because you are a woman yourself.”

Nico almost choked on her own saliva. Something clicked in her mind and before she thought better of it, she gave voice to it. “You said you didn’t understand…”

“I said I don’t understand why my daughter initially fell for you.” Dr. Nishikino interrupted, reading Nico’s thoughts. “I know why she loves you now. I’ve met you in person. I’ve been able to learn more about you. I’ve seen you together with my daughter, how you look at one another, how you talk about one another. It’s all quite obvious now. But for the first few months when Maki first spoke about you, I didn’t even know your name, you were just her ‘annoying, bratty senior.’”

Nico couldn’t help scoffing at that. Maki had never called her that to her face, but she had mentioned it to Nozomi a time or two. And in hindsight, Nico couldn’t really blame her junior as she herself had a few choice ways of describing the naïve and spoiled rich girl.

“But somehow you two managed to move past that.” The man concluded.

“Honestly, I’m not entirely sure how we did it either…” Nico admitted.

“A mystery for the ages then.” Maki’s father said with a shrug. “You know, my wife and I have spoken several times, at length about the relationship between you and our daughter. We assumed things were progressing between you and moving in together proved just how serious things were. Honestly, I’m a little surprised it took this long for the subject to come up. But now here you are, seeking her father’s blessing. How ironically traditional.”

“I figured it was the right thing to do…”

“Oh, don’t get me wrong,” Dr. Nishikino shook his head slightly, “I am honored that you have chosen to respect such a tradition. As you are undoubtedly aware, I am a very traditional individual. I was raised with many traditional values that I continue to value today. However, your relationship with my daughter does not exactly conform with those traditions and as such, I will not deny that I had my reservations when I learned that you two had started dating.

“I feared your relationship would adversely affect the Nishikino name, and I have caught wind of some dissent. However, the majority of individuals who have openly opposed your relationship appear to have been former fans of yours, and you suffered the worst of the backlash. And while you have my condolences for that, you seem to have weathered the storm well and come out of it only the better.

“I feared your relationship would adversely affect the hospital and its reputation. However, I’m sure you’ve noticed that my staff is quite fond of you and patients enjoy your visits. The fact that you’re dating the future director of the facility seems to only add to your celebrity status. And even in the days immediately after your first concert, overall moral seemed to have improved. The patients are happier and make fewer complaints about general discomfort. My staff is happier and not more than two days go by without someone asking when the next concert will be. There are still those who maintain their opposition to the idea of holding semi-regular concerts in a hospital, but even many of them have admitted, albeit begrudgingly, to seeing the positive effects.

“My last concern is of the Nishikino legacy. As the father of an only daughter, I have had to come to terms with the very real possibility of Maki not keeping the family name once married, as that is often viewed as the traditional thing to do. I held on to the small hope that she would decide to keep it for professional reasons. However, I must claim ignorance to the traditions when it comes to the type of marriage yours would be. Would you, Yazawa Nico, upon taking my daughter’s hand in marriage, allow her to keep the Nishikino name, should she desire to do so?”

“Absolutely.” Nico replied immediately. “I mean, like you said, that’s the name she’s already known by professionally, right? And to be honest, I can’t imagine her being anything other than a Nishikino.”

“I assume you will also be keeping your name, for professional reasons.”

“Probably.” Nico nodded.

“I realize it is ultimately the decision of you and Maki, but would you do me the honor of at least considering any children you may have to carry the Nishikino name as well?”

“Children?” Nico had to force herself not to balk. “That’s… still something I need to talk with Maki about.”

“Do you not want children?”

“Oh no, that’s not it.” Nico realized how her reaction may have been interpreted. “I definitely want kids. I’ve dreamed of having children of my own for years. It’s how we go about it that is something Maki and I will have to talk about. But yes, I am willing to consider giving them the Nishikino name, even if I do not take it for myself.”

“Thank you.”

Nico smiled. This was going far easier than she had imagined. Part of her had honestly thought she would need to make some grandiose speech like they always did in the movies, threaten to elope or some other dramatic display, to convince Maki’s father to allow them to marry.

But Maki had been right. Her father was traditional and often a bit stubborn, but he was willing to listen to contrary arguments and occasionally allow them to stand. He had proven this time and time again; allowing Maki to continue being a school idol, allowing the two of them move in together, allowing concerts to be held in his hospital, and many other times.

Yet, despite being fairly confident, Nico still had thought she would have a more difficult time gaining his approval to be Maki’s spouse. Now, she found herself wondering why she had stressed herself so much over the issue.

“If you don’t mind my asking,” Dr. Nishikino continued, “where were you planning on holding the ceremony?”

“I’m sorry?” Nico wasn’t quite sure she understood the question.

“I’m sure you are aware that a marriage between two women is not currently legal here in Japan.”

“Yes…”

“Have you considered seeking a certificate from Shibuya or Setagaya?”

“It’s not quite the same.”

“Fair enough.” Dr. Nishikino nodded. “Then, were you and my daughter going to travel to a country where such unions are legal?”

“Probably.”

“You weren’t planning on staying in that country after, were you?”

“Oh no. Definitely not.” Nico shook her head. “The Nishikino Hospital is here. Egao is here. Our families are here. Maki and I are both happily rooted here in Japan. Well, Tokyo, really, if you want to be specific.”

“That’s good to hear.”

“And I don’t care if our marriage isn’t legally recognized here at home. I know I want to spend the rest of my life with Maki and I want to do something that proves that to the world.”

“A romantic.” A small smiled formed on Dr. Nishikino’s lips.

“Maki-chan has accused me of that before.” Nico smiled as well.

“Perhaps I can be of assistance there.”

“What do you mean?”

“As I’m sure you know, the topic has been debated on making such things legal; it’s a progressive world and Japan is lagging behind in some areas such as these.”

“Yeah…”

“Well, my wife and I are not politicians ourselves, but we can bend the ears of a few. Obviously, I cannot promise results, traditionalists such as myself can be stubborn, but if I can change my mind on some things, perhaps others will as well. And I am willing to do what I can to help my daughter and her partner be happy.”

“You would do that for us?”

“It’s the least I can do.” Dr. Nishikino admitted. “Maki has met or exceeded my expectations for her, my concerns over her relationship have been more or less abated, and she has found someone who loves her the way she deserves to be loved. I see little reason not to and every reason to support you.”

Nico’s smile broadened. “Thank you.”

“However, for the time being, I believe it best to continue referring to each other formally.”

Nico tilted her head in confusion.

“Though I’m confident in my daughter’s answer to your eventual proposal, I believe you want to keep it secret for now, am I right?”

“Oh, yeah…” Nico couldn’t help feeling a little foolish for not figuring that out on her own. “That makes sense.”

“Ah, the food is here.” Dr. Nishikino looked out from their booth to somewhere else in the restaurant. “Would you like another glass of wine, Nico?”

“I thought you said…”

“My apologies, I meant we should keep things formal in front of Maki and my wife.”

“Ah…”

“But tonight they are not here and I believe we have reason to celebrate.” He turned his attention to the server as she arrived at the table. “We’ll need another bottle.” He indicated the wine in front of him.

“Right away, sir.” The woman replied before setting down the plates and heading back to retrieve the new order.

“A toast, then, before we eat?” Dr. Nishikino offered, splitting the remaining wine between the two glasses.

“Alright.” Nico replied, holding up her glass. “To Maki.”

“And her future wife.”

“Cheers.” The two said in unison.

Author’s Note Continued: The topic of marriage in Japan is not something I wish to delve into too deeply with HtHaN, but I do wish to at least acknowledge it. I also mention it here because I like the idea of Maki’s parents being willing to play a role in getting the law changed for the sake of their daughter. Also, from what limited canon details have been revealed about Maki's father, I see him as the type to bring up the subject in this situation.

Still, to be quite frank, the politics surrounding the issue in my own country are enough to make my head spin and I am not sure if I able to commit the effort of learning such things for another country simply for the sake of writing a more believable fanfic. Dr. Nishikino mentioning a certificate from two nearby districts was merely the result of a quick Wikipedia search. Suffice to say the law is changed at some point in the HtHaN timeline, as should be obvious due to Nico and Maki being married in the later scenes; even before the numbered scenes. That all said, I will undoubtedly have a character mention, even if only in passing, that the law finally changed. I can only hope by that time, the scene may mirror a real world event.

I should also point out that despite the fact that Nico is seeking permission to marry Maki from her father, this does not necessarily mean that Nico will ultimately be the one to propose. I honestly haven't decided that yet and have notes for both versions of the scene. In fact, the more I think I about it, I may very well write another scene with Maki seeking the approval of Nico's mother.

Edit: Before I forget again, I should point out that while I personally think asking the parent's of one's future spouse for permission to marry is a bit archaic, I headcanon Nico being the type to believe it necessary. Based mostly on her reaction to the romance movie the group watched in the second season, I see her as a not-so-secret fan of classic romance movies; something I've tried to hint at in a few scenes, including this one. After watching enough of those, especially the older ones, she undoubtedly has a few interesting ideas about how things are supposed to go. Combine this with her knowing Maki's father to upholds some older values himself, and we get this scene.

[storyunrelated]

Short Stories

For a given value of ‘short’, seeing as how most people’s definition of a short story is about 5k up to 10k (roughly) while mine is lucky to reach two thousand. But! That’s variety for you, eh? We’re all different? Etc?

Anyway.

These are the ones I’ve put up on here. You’ll notice I don’t do that anymore. The reason – to myself at least – is the ever-lurking notion that one day I might parcel a bunch of these up together and do something fancy with them. Unlikely, but the thought keeps me up at night sometimes. If only because of the work that would be involved.

Speaking of which, I do sometimes also consider parceling up all of these ones into an e-book or something (the ‘Money for Old Rope’ collection I’ve mentioned previously).

This would require work too, as these below are peppered with typos and poor structure. This is because I don’t proofread.

Because I don’t CARE.

(I had to put them below this line because there’s a lot of them and I can’t in good conscience do that to your dashes. Of course, this now means that no-one will look but, you know, swings and roundabouts.)

Unwanted Advances – The logic of online pornographic robots is even more obtuse when they appear in real life, at your front door. Who’d be stupid enough to fall for that? 

An Interview With… - Something I wrote for a contest thingy with a local writing group. Didn’t win, obviously. It’s about an interview, obviously. Someone trying to make a big break in the blogosphere by talking with something they found in the garden. In a chasm. 

Just A Touch – For a refreshing change, believe what a conspiracy theorist believes for a little bit. Only recreationally, you understand. Just a taste. 

In The Loop – A very childish game, played with the very real possibility of horrible consequences should you fail. The thing behind you won’t do wonders for your concentration. 

Soothe Me – Sometimes, while doing horrible things for what they think is a good reason, a person might suffer a bout of introspection and wonder whether murder and horror is the right thing to be doing. Luckily, there’s usually someone on hand to explain why being a monster is fine.

Cupcake – There’s a hole in my bathroom wall and out of this hole extends an arm. Me and the arm are buddies, and a cupcake seems a good way of expressing this.

Checklist – What’s keeping you here?

Rollover – Even as your efforts come to nothing and you wither away to dust know that the trying will never stop.

Immovable Object – The next stage in unskippable advertisements (obviously the best form of advertisements) is something rather more difficult to ignore.

Oh What’s New? – Networking is very important! It’s all about who you know! So go in there and try to make some connections! What’s the worst that can happen? Really?

Get Hammered – You’re special, but special doesn’t fit. Don’t worry. You can be made to fit. (And later when you see someone else lauded for not fitting, don’t complain; no-one likes bitterness).

Open Platform – It’s important to let people speak their piece, but it’s equally important to recognise that what some people want to say is nothing but toxic.

Ga-Ga, Goo-Goo – The world is a scary place, isn’t it? So many bad things happening! All so complicated! No solutions without drawbacks! Problems on top of problems with no end in sight! Wouldn’t it be better if you could just divest yourself of responsibility and press yourself to the bosom of someone big and strong who’ll stroke your hair and tell you who’s to blame? Good news!

By The Book – Pick the beliefs that best reflect yours, rather than having to adjust your view to conform to something else – where’s the fun in that? Show me which book lets me hate the people I already hate and let’s get going!

Stay The Course – Support the tyrant to the hilt! Until they do something that directly impacts you, at which point you should bawl your lungs out about how unfair it is.

Old Songs – I thing I wrote out by hand (writing club, again) and then transposed. A man who can fix things by singing to them, obviously. Old songs have power, you see?

Sit Comfortably – What starts as an unusual job interview goes in an unforeseen direction. Specifically underground. Where there are spiders. More spiders, rather. (This story has a lot of spiders).

Things Are Grim – A dystopian broadcast to tell the populace something they already know for no good reason. You never know when an audience who doesn’t know how the future works might be watching, after all.

Tabula Rasa – The Book is very important, but you are not allowed to read it.

Reaper of Souls – A being of immense power watches over the city, guarding it from necromantic mischief. It also likes fanfiction and knows the importance of leaving feedback.

Out The Door – A man makes things and the two others that live with him have differing opinions on what he should do with them once they’re done. Do you improve them first, or do you move on? Ultimately, who even cares?

My Violent Heart – Using machines to turn people into soulless drones so they work without complaint seemed like such a good idea at the time.

Tinted – Goggles that allow you to see the world not as it is, but as you think it should be.

Sanded Down – You only have so much sand in your life and how you use it is very important. But using it is far more important than hoarding it. After all, even if you do something badly at least you’ve done something…

Misshapen – Looking at what everyone else is doing, it seems easy enough to replicate. Right? Right?

For Your Own Good – “Unhand that phallus!” and with that cry is the crime of male masturbation rudely interrupted. But it’s entirely altruistic – that’s spinal fluid, that is!

Flensed – Every month you’re renewed and every months you’re stripped to nothing once more. This horrible process happens without fail and it does not get any easier.

Southern Pole – How else should you define yourself except by how you are not like someone else?

Interloper – You don’t belong here.

Tannin Salon – The best tea in the world? Why, the nectar of the Teabeast of course! Getting it is a bit of a pain, naturally, but that’s all part of the allure!

Well Off – Someone’s been put at the bottom of the well, and someone at the top has a vested interest in this staying that way.

Machinegun Man – A long way from home, in the rain, only a gun for company.

Extra-Curricular – An ovoid in class provides answers the teacher cannot bear to hear.

Little Shop Of Sandwiches – A dusty, quiet little sandwich shop that sells lunchtime snacks the likes of which few have ever seen. The likes fewer still have eaten!

Start The Clock – The time between you starting a conversation and it all falling apart horribly because you’re an awkward mess is always smaller than you think. Clock’s ticking!

Rote – It might feel like you’re doing the same thing over and over (and over) again, but somehow from the outside everyone seems to think you’re all over the place.

Push On – Success can be yours! Look at all these other people! They succeeded. You can too! Just keep going! No matter how had it gets.

Excision – In the future, love is to be outlawed! No-one is really clear as to why, however.

Consult A Doctor – If you experience an erection that kills you, you should probably get that checked out.

Object of Disputation – A child tries to make something nice for their parents but everyone else has an opinion on what it actually is.

Catch Of The Slate Sea – A man on a cliff watches a big ship catch a big fish.

Faceless – We wear many faces in life, acquiring new ones as we grow and as we encounter those who dislike what faces we have already. It can be so hard to keep track of who you were to start with. Then again, were you ever anyone?

Slice And Dice – A man invents a superior method of killing that which is reluctant to die.

We Care A Lot – There are those that are paid to be professionally unpleasant in very public places. Eventually, machines displace all jobs held by persons – such unpleasant people aren’t as safe as they think.

Taste Test – Blended down, is there any real difference between these two people? A focus group shall decide!

Limit Break – Be nice enough and it’s inevitable

Three-Way – Just because what you believe also happens to be what’s best for society doesn’t mean you’re biased or myopic. You’re just sensible! It’s everyone else with the problem.

Better Than – How far would people go to avoid something horrible happening? Often, far enough that they’ll inflict something far worse and fail to see the irony. That’s irony! Is it? Maybe.

Infantalise – Casting men is easy! There’s no upper limit. Women (girls, sorry)? That’s another story! They get old so quickly! And who wants that? We have to go younger. Much, much younger. No, younger than that!

Material – Where do these journalists get these outlandish tales? Out of thin air, obviously.

Barred And Shuttered – Life is full of opportunities! Just not for you. A lifetime of closed doors. Have fun!

So Delicate. So Fragile – A man births an opinion! He’s surprised, but knows he must protect it from everything and everyone. Exposure is lethal to an opinion! It might become something else.

Mother Of Invention – Every new weapon invented is touted as the last one, the one horrible enough to turn mankind off war forever. Eventually that’s got to bear fruit. Surely.

All That’s Fit To Protect – Wrapped in lies, the truth of harm is simply deflected.

Abstinent Without Leave – What’s the best way of ensuring The Youth is not banging away like an outhouse door? Education, trust and respect? No! Ignorance!

Great Hunt – The girl is gorgeous and her father is unusual. A boy is invited to the house of the most popular, wonderful girl at school, though he knows not why. He also doesn’t know why all these other guys have been invited, either.

Nothing To Hide – If you’re not thinking anything bad then you won’t mind having your head smashed and your thoughts poked at, right?

The Perfect Model – The human body is disgusting but we’re forced to hang clothes on it so we must find the best example for this. Why must women insist on having MASS?

Lead Balloon – Trapped in an office a man yearns to run off with the nice lady from across the room. Does it end well? Take a guess.

Four Guys – The best burger you might ever encounter! But at what cost?

By His Own Hand – A man is desperate to leave a mark and to leave life on his own terms.

Somebody Cares – Someone trying to put a comforting, supportive voice into his head does it wrong and regrets his decision. His method of removing the voice might perhaps be going a bit far.

Restructure – Journalists are obsolete. We feed a monster now.

Magic Eye – What’s obvious to everyone is not so obvious to this one guy.

Rod For His Own Back – Watch what you say, or else you may find your words used against you.

Bad Boss – Not everyone is cut out to be an evil overlord.

La-La-La – If you ignore a problem like everyone’s legs turning invisible then it’ll probably just go away.

Inner Glow – Scooping out his insides and replacing them with hot coals.

You May Find This Relevant To Your Situation – Truffling for potatoes in a lake of shit.

The Door Opens and Let’s the Future In - Nigel mustn’t touch the door. The future is on the other side.

Writing Is The Wall - Waking up to find a huge wall has cut their bedroom in half. It says something, but they don’t see it. You will.

Hoops - Life is a series of hoops, and each one matters until you jump it, then you find out it didn’t.

Flat - A man finds out something about his partner he should have noticed before.

Secret Techniques - They make tea differently in this office.

Dancing in the Dark - Do what you enjoy, no matter the audience.

Close Observation - It’s nice to be watched, but it’s not happening.

Slug - The people who run the world are beaten to the punch.

We Have to Go Deeper - Layers of suffering lie beneath your feet, and further still beneath those.

Exegesis - Feel free to bring your own meaning to the book, but disagree with me at your peril. Your soul is at stake.

Square Cube - Weaponising physics to kill kaiju

Irresistible - A court-case segues into just raving about how poorly-handled sexual assault cases are. So, uh, enjoy that.

Smoke - Newspapers spew enough nonsense that it stops working.

The Dick Heard Around the World - A man sends a picture of his penis to a woman. It works too well.

Driving Home for Christmas - I look at the driver next to me. He’s just the same.

Hangers On - Saying the wrong thing can attract unwanted attention.

Bottled Up - A man in a cave puts stories in bottles. No-one cares.

Little Furnace - Curiosity burns bright in the human breast, which can end badly if mishandled.

Pecking Order - The worse a tenant you are, the higher you are placed in the building.

Waiting Around - There are those who sit and wait for opportunity to fall into their laps

Hazy - A man loses himself.

[junker-town]

Mapping out the USWNT’s future

Who you can expect to see come in and out of the team heading into the next World Cup in four years.

The World Cup is over and there won’t be another one for four years, but the United States women’s national team will have to spend that period constantly developing its roster.

There are 12 players 30 or older on the current USWNT, and it had the oldest average age of any team at the World Cup. There’s also some incredible young talent in the youth national team ranks. The squad is likely to experience some significant turnover ahead of the 2023 World Cup, and these are the players you should be keeping an eye on.

But first...

They’re going to run it back for the Olympics

Many of the players on the current USWNT were also on the 2016 side that disappointed in Brazil, and they’re going to want to make amends for that. The Olympics has a smaller roster size — 18 instead of 23 — so there will be some tough omissions. But don’t expect any of the older star players to retire or get cut until after the Olympics in Japan.

Expected to be on their way out

These are players who, due to either age or a recent lack of playing time, will probably not be on every USWNT roster after 2020.

GK Ashlyn Harris — She’s two years older than starting goalkeeper Alyssa Naeher so Jill Ellis (or whoever replaces her) will likely want to start giving the backup reps to a young player and start grooming Harris’ future replacement.

DF Ali Krieger — Krieger is 34 and was out of the team for two years until just before the World Cup, so it would be surprising if she continued past the Olympics.

DF Becky Sauerbrunn — Center backs tend to age better than players at other positions, so perhaps we shouldn’t count Sauerbrunn out. But she hasn’t been at quite her previous world-beating form for club or country over the past couple of years, and she’ll be 38 when the next World Cup rolls around.

MF Allie Long — Long spent more team off the USWNT than on it during the past year and likely made her way back into the squad for locker room chemistry reasons, rather than footballing ones. Unless she starts turning in NWSL MVP-quality performances, she’s among the prime candidates to miss out on the Olympics due to the smaller roster size.

FW Carli Lloyd — Don’t tell Lloyd that a 40-year-old is unlikely to make the USWNT’s next World Cup roster... but a 40-year-old is unlikely to make the USWNT’s next World Cup roster.

FW Jessica McDonald — McDonald finally getting her USWNT shot at 31 has been an amazing story. But unfortunately, the other forwards she’s behind are around the same age, and Ellis is going to need to start succession planning for the front line immediately. That means a young player is likely to take McDonald’s place.

FW Megan Rapinoe — Hey, I’m not going to bet against Rapinoe. But she’ll be 38 when 2023 rolls around, and with her increased public profile following this World Cup, she has opportunities to make a lot more money outside of soccer than she ever did playing the game.

Future unclear

These players won’t necessarily be too old to be at their physical peak in 2023, but for various reasons, it’s not obvious how much of a future they have with the USWNT.

GK Adrianna Franch — On NWSL form, Franch should have been the starting keeper already. At 28, she’s probably a bit too old to take over from Naeher in the future. She might stay on the roster as a backup, but it wouldn’t be surprising to see Ellis opt for two young keepers that she rotates behind Naeher.

DF Kelley O’Hara — O’Hara said herself that she didn’t think she’d be able to make the impact she did at the World Cup after her injury issues over the past couple of years. Her ankles might not let her make it another four years at the top of the pro game.

DF Emily Sonnett — There’s no real knock on Sonnett, and no reason she shouldn’t stay in the team. She’s 25, and will probably be better in four years. She’s played well for Portland Thorns. But Ellis doesn’t seem to rate her as highly as her other defenders, and she’s been left off rosters when healthy before.

MF Morgan Brian — Ellis clearly believes in Brian’s talent. Even when she’s been in poor club form or struggling for fitness, she’s gotten call-ups and substitute appearances. But if Brian can’t stay fit for an entire season, Ellis will have to start considering other options.

FW Alex Morgan — No one would put it past Morgan to stay on top of her game for the next four years and chase down Abby Wambach’s record. Her development as a deep-lying forward that is no longer reliant on her pace means she can continue to be an effective national team player well into her 30s. But she’s going to be 34 when the next World Cup rolls around, which is old for a women’s soccer player, so she’s in this section.

FW Tobin Heath — Same deal as Morgan, basically. Her technical skills mean she’ll be useful even if she has no pace, but she’s even older than Morgan.

FW Christen Press — Unlike Morgan and Heath, Press clearly is not first choice at the moment, so she might have a harder time hanging onto her place as she ages into her mid-30s.

Even better next time?

These players are definitely sticking around for the next four years, and they’ll be expected to become the new stars of the team.

GK Alyssa Naeher — Naeher exceeded expectations in her first World Cup as the USWNT No. 1, and she should get better with experience. Goalkeepers usually don’t decline until well into their late 30s.

DF Abby Dahlkemper — She’s one of the best passing center backs in the world at 26, and she should be an even more intelligent distributor of the ball at 30.

DF/MF Julie Ertz — I’m not sure if Ertz’s future is at defensive midfield or center back, but she’s sensational at both of them, and shouldn’t be any slower in 2023 than she is right now.

DF Tierna Davidson — A prediction: Davidson will become the USWNT’s starting left back shortly, clearing the way for...

DF/FW Crystal Dunn — Dunn to move into a wide forward role. She’s one of the best attackers in NWSL and it wouldn’t be surprising to see her take over Rapinoe’s role shortly.

MF Lindsey Horan — Another prediction: By 2023, Horan will be the consensus best player on the planet.

MF Sam Mewis — Mewis is one of the slickest passers in the world, and at 26, she still has room to grow in that area. Expect her to be a truly world class playmaker in four years.

MF Rose Lavelle — It looks like Lavelle has finally put her recurring injuries behind her, and now the sky’s the limit. She hasn’t had an extended run in a club team with decent teammates and an attacking philosophy yet. We have no idea how good she can be.

FW Mallory Pugh — Same for Pugh, and she’s on the same team with Lavelle. Their combinations were nuts in the couple games they got to play together for the Washington Spirit before heading off to international duty. With every other forward on the squad being 30 or older, 21-year-old Pugh will be counted on to become one of the team’s best players quickly.

Fringe players still battling

These NWSL players didn’t make the USWNT roster this time around, and probably won’t for the Olympics. However, their national team dreams are far from over if they play well in NWSL.

GK Jane Campbell — Previously on the roster, Campbell is the leading candidate to start getting Harris’ minutes. She’s having a very solid season for the Houston Dash.

GK Aubrey Bledsoe — Bledsoe isn’t as young as Campbell, and her distribution leaves quite a bit to be desired, but she’s developed into NWSL’s best shot-stopper. If she can improve her goal kicks and passing, she’ll get a NT shot.

DF Casey Short — Short is one of NWSL’s most consistent defenders, but doesn’t make much of an attacking contribution from fullback, which Ellis values. Still, she’s one of the best fullbacks in the country and should be on the roster.

DF Megan Oyster — While the international players were away, Oyster was arguably the best center back in NWSL and one of the biggest reasons that Reign FC moved up into first place. She’s had two caps, and is clearly on Ellis’ radar.

DF Emily Menges — Ask Thorns fans and some will tell you, in a low whisper so no one hears, that Menges is actually the best central defender on their team. She doesn’t quite have Sonnett’s physical talent, but she’s more composed and makes fewer mistakes.

DF Jaelene Hinkle — You probably think that Hinkle is out of the national team because of her personal views on homosexuality, and most fans seem OK with that decision. If that’s the case, she obviously has no path back to the national team. But U.S. Soccer says she was only cut for soccer reasons and that her personal views have nothing to do with her exclusion. If that’s true, her status as the league’s assist leader while playing good defense on arguably the best team in NWSL is going to lead to her being reconsidered.

MF Danielle Colaprico — An injury led to Colaprico having to decline a call-up just before the World Cup, and that was that for her chances of making the roster. She’s been the most consistent holding midfielder in the league since she arrived, though, and should get another shot.

MF Sofia Huerta — This is a weird case. Huerta was tried out at right back by Ellis, and asked for a trade from Chicago to Houston to get more time at that position, in order to make the World Cup team. Houston correctly identified that Huerta was one of the best attacking midfielders in the league, so they played her there, ruining her chances of making the USWNT. Unfortunately, her 2019 numbers aren’t even close to what she did in 2018, and now she doesn’t look USWNT quality at either position. But there’s no denying that Huerta, at her best, is one of the 23 best American footballers. Don’t count her out yet.

FW Kealia Ohai — I don’t know why it hasn’t quite worked out for Ohai. She’s looked amazing in bursts at Houston, and she’s got a few national team caps. But she hasn’t translated her best performances and blazing speed into consistent production yet. At 27, her time isn’t up yet, but the clock is ticking fast.

FW Midge Purce — Like Huerta, Purce is likely considered a right back prospect by Ellis. Problem for Portland is, she’s been balling in a more advanced position, and right back Ellie Carpenter is back from Australia duty. Purce is talented enough to play for the USWNT, but it’s hard to see her getting a chance under the current circumstances.

FW Lynn Williams — The former NWSL MVP has gotten plenty of national team call-ups, but hasn’t quite meshed with Ellis and her system. There’s a serious dearth of prime-age striker talent in the pool, though, with most of Ellis’ options being in their 30s or teenagers. Being a good 26-year-old is enough to get Williams another look.

Coming soon... we think

These young players have turned pro and had a taste of USWNT action. I expect them to become regulars over the next couple of years.

GK Casey Murphy — The prime candidate to replace Harris’ minutes and become Naeher’s understudy. The 23-year-old has played a pro season in France with Montpellier and is currently playing out of her mind for Reign FC.

UT Hailie Mace — Mace is going to make the national team simply because of her ability to play literally every position on the field. She’s getting most of her minutes for Rosengard in Norway at striker, but she’s played a lot of winger, fullback, and even a little center back, on the left and right sides. She’s a player Ellis wants on her bench.

MF Andi Sullivan — Ask any coach in NWSL and they’ll tell you that Sullivan is a lock to be a national team fixture for the next decade. The 23-year-old is already captain of the Washington Spirit and can play any midfield position.

MF/FW Savannah McCaskill — McCaskill has gotten her national team minutes under Ellis at central midfield, but it looks like her new team Chicago Red Stars intend on using her as a deep-lying forward, linking superstar striker Sam Kerr and the midfield behind her. As a hard-working midfield-forward tweener, she could replace a lot of Carli Lloyd’s minutes.

Ones for the longer-range future

These players are rookies or college players at the moment, but they’ve turned in impressive youth national team performances, and are firmly on Ellis’ radar.

GK Meagan McClelland — She was the Big Ten freshman of the year at Rutgers and is already getting called into Under-23 camps at 18 years old.

DF Tegan McGrady — Hamstring injuries have kept the Spirit left back from making a big impact in her rookie season, but if she gets healthy, she’s expected to enter the national team rotation.

DF Emily Fox — Fox already has three caps and is probably the best player still plying her trade in college. The UNC star should become a fixture on the roster whenever Sauerbrunn decides to call it quits.

DF Sam Staab — Staab has exceeded expectations in her rookie year for the Spirit and is one of the big contenders for rookie of the year. She’s incredible at hitting long-range passes with her left foot, something Ellis values.

DF Alana Cook — Currently out of the USWNT hype spotlight due to her move to Paris Saint-Germain. Hopefully she can keep getting paid abroad and doesn’t need to move home to get onto Ellis’ radar.

DF/MF Naomi Girma — The Stanford sophomore can play in defense or midfield, which is certainly a plus for her future national team prospects. With Cook and Davidson gone, she’ll be expected to lead the Stanford defense.

MF Jaelin Howell — The 19-year-old has already been to a senior camp and was the midfield anchor for Florida State’s national title-winning team as a frehsman. She’s already a good enough DM to help any team in the world that doesn’t have Julie Ertz.

MF Brianna Pinto — An intelligent and slick passing midfielder, Pinto has already been called into a senior national team camp. With Dorian Bailey graduating, she’ll now be expected to lead UNC’s midfield.

MF Kate Wiesner — Wiesner has yet to make her collegiate debut, but she’s the No. 1 ranked player in her recruiting class. She should become the starting left winger at Penn State immediately and start making a case for national team looks with her excellent left foot service.

FW Ashley Sanchez — Sanchez has actually failed to reach the heights she was predicted to since she first got called into a full national team camp, but no one is writing her off at 20 years old. With Mace departing UCLA, Sanchez will be expected to take over a starring role this season.

FW Catarina Macario — Brazilian-American Macario is widely considered the best player in college soccer, but won’t be eligible for U.S. citizenship for two years. She’s made it clear that she wants to play for the USWNT, though, and regularly participates in Under-23 national team camps even though she can’t play official games under FIFA rules. She should be fast-tracked to the full national team whenever her citizenship comes through.

FW Sophia Smith — The most obvious candidate for USWNT stardom in the future, Smith has 21 goals in 25 Under-20 appearances, and scored seven goals in 13 appearances for Stanford as a freshman.

There are so many great NWSL and college players we couldn’t fit here

Seriously, watch NWSL. If you’re a real nerd and want to get into this stuff hardcore, you can find great info on youth soccer at Top Drawer Soccer, and college soccer games are usually on streaming services you already have like ESPN3 and ESPN+. There are — no joke — 50 other players I thought of that could have conceivably made this list, so huge thanks to my supremely nerdy pals Fitzcamel and Travis Clark for helping me put this together.