#and bead i used for his eyes bc it have a lot of colours in it and really similar to whatever reference i could find???i love it so much

[imerian]

Vr46 academy keychains

Set of five charms that all match in different ways

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　 . ✦　　˚　

Open for detailed pictures of each one

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ *ੈ✩‧₊˚

ִֶָ 𓂃˖˳·˖ ִֶָ ⋆★⋆ ִֶָ˖·˳˖𓂃 ִֶָ

:･ﾟ✧:･.☽˚｡･ﾟ✧:･.:

˖⁺‧₊˚⭒✮⭒˚₊‧⁺˖

. ݁₊ ✶. ݁ ˖ˎˊ˗

I ran out of tags so I'll say it here but i would greatly appreciate a reblog, especially if you share your thoughts on these pieces in tags (⁠｡⁠•̀⁠ᴗ⁠-⁠)⁠✧

(Also i forgot that bez have matching part with luca so I didn’t add that to tags sorry

[nikolai-alexi]

For @jegulus-microfic Prompt: Coffee WC: 638

“Kaleidoscope”

Tags: black brothers angst™️, very small mention of Walburga Black’s A+ Parenting, this is a very one sided conversation bc Reg is terrified of communication, there’s lots of metaphors in here bc Reg is dramatic as hell

“I made a kaleidoscope when I was six,” he says out of the blue; there’s no warning to his words, no context, no clues as to why he’s chosen this to talk about or where he’s going with it.

James doesn’t mind though. He’d listen to Regulus speak for hours, even if he didn’t understand a word. It’s a rare treat to hear Regulus speak with words that are entirely his own, and not ones sharpened and crafted to slip between the metaphorical rib cage of his, often unknowing, conversational opponent.

“I made a kaleidoscope out of a kitchen paper roll, crystal beads I stole from Bellatrix and Narcissa’s Yuletide dresses, pieces of a shattered mirror, and parchment that I shaved down with a penknife I shouldn’t have had, but did anyways.”

James just hums. Regulus feels it reverberate through James’ chest and through his own, and it’s a comforting thing, but he’s endlessly grateful that he doesn’t have to look James in the eye for this conversation.

“It took me days to get the parchment thin enough for the light to refract, but I left it on the study desk accidentally, and Kreacher threw it into the rubbish,”

James’ hand stutters for just a moment where he runs his fingers through Regulus’ tangled curls, gently — oh so gently — picking apart each gnarled knot.

“I was six, and couldn’t bare the thought of letting all that hard work go to waste, so I pulled it out of the rubbish bin. Someone had dumped coffee grounds into the bin, and it stained the parchment,”

James can see the disappointed pout on a chubbier, softer, six year old version of Regulus in his mind’s eye, and he has to try very hard not to laugh at the image.

“I was devastated, of course, but refused to accept that my hard work was destroyed, so I used it anyways. And it was magical. I’d lay on the floor of my bedroom staring into this haphazard disaster of a thing for hours, turning it this way and that way, changing the patterns and colours depending on where I pointed it,” Regulus sighs wistfully, “The stains that I’d been so devastated by had served to alter that light refraction even more, casting shadows and changing the way the light touched the shards. There was nothing more I loved that lying there and just existing amongst the world of light and colour and shadow that I’d created.”

And ah, there it is. James has an idea of where Regulus is going with this.

“The coffee grounds being thrown in the bin over my piece of parchment was an accident, but it was exactly what I needed to alter this perfect reality of peace and brightness for myself.“

It’s silent for a long time. Neither of them say a word. All that moves is their chests in tandem as they breathe the night’s air.

“Those stains never moved on the parchment. The light changed the way they appeared, but the coffee stained it exactly where it fell. Sometimes I wonder if that moment wasn’t a foreshadowing for my life, where Sirius is the light bouncing off the mirror and beads, and I’m simply the coffee covered parchment that stays stagnant unless manipulated into moving.”

James’ heart cries at that image, but he understands Regulus’ words. He doesn’t know the answer to Regulus’ unasked question; Merlin how he wished he could give him that answer though.

“I wonder how my six year old self would feel,” Regulus muses, sadness dripping off his words, “if he knew somewhere along the lines of growing up too quickly that I can no longer see that rainbow of light anymore. I wonder what he would say if he found out I could only see the shadows from the coffee stains.”

[siodium]

afa (mostly) + the marketplace collective haul =͟͟͞͞(꒪ᗜ꒪‧̣̥̇)

orv hairclip set, sticker sheets, photocards, 3d keychains, and prints (@miu_akatsuki) - these are the stuffs that i wanted the most at afa, especially the shattered pc set!!! i was so afraid they'd be oos by the time i went on sunday, so i asked my colleague to help me grab most of the items when he went on friday. he missed out on the keychains, but luckily, they were still available on sunday~ i also got a lot of freebies!! love them!!

narutomaki charm, soy sauce fish charm, tabemono print + freebie snowglobe sticker (@mintymentaiko)

food prints and pouches (@eggbuttertoast) - um so i was supposed to pick either the bakery or the coffee shop design but i ended up with both.

omw to f*ck shit up print, mystery rollerblades print, mystery sticker pack (@sadshrimps) - absolutely had to get the shrimp driving print bc same. i am a learning-to-drive shrimp. sadshrimps also complimented my fit and horns?? made my day. 🥺🫶

a6 hualian and orv prints (@mors_gn) - wanted the hualian print when i saw their catalogue!! so pretty.

a5 ivan&till prints, dokja prints (@daedawdaw) - the coloursss omg absolutely gorgeous!!

a6 orv foil prints, circus show dokja sticker pack (@yiyuehua) - the foil effects are so nicee.

ivantill sticker sheet and keychain, red and white warning belt (@rollround) - thought about the belt for the longest time and finally pulled the trigger.

makima sticker (@shibaruirui)

hotpot magnet set (@heyvegemates) - sponsored by koko hehe~ new magnets for my print board~ gonna update it soon since i bought so many new prints.

"you're my ebi-thing", "biggest crybaby", and takoyaki lover stickers (@shabubaraa)

tummy ache survivor sticker (@poroful) - koko got this for me cuz it is me.

melon soda, cafe date, and night market sticker sheets, bread packaging washi tape, squishy charm blind pack (@mochigardens) - i accidentally bought a dupe of the washi tape..... (•᷄ࡇ•᷅ ;) good to know that my aesthetic is consistent LMAO.

kasa obake strawberry milk and bakeneko milk socks (@shermstan) - i love all the sock designs!!! i might get the other two designs next time...

assorted pokemon stamp set, espurr keychain, wooloo and chandelure omamori pouch (@pokebox) - i'm neither an aries nor a libra but i like the pokemons so!! currently using the wooloo one to store the omamori i got at the fushimi inari shrine. i haven't tried the stamp set but i had to get it bc there was an espurr design.

mushroom and bok choy beaded keychains (@??)

dunmeshi reusable bag, izutsumi wooden keychain (@cheebpaku) - i've been eyeing both of these for a while!! the bag was sold out last time iirc, and i just didn't wanna pick favourites for the charm bc i actually don't have a fav dunmeshi chara. sO i made my colleague pick one out for me when he was helping me shop. i thought he'd pick his fav senshi but he got me izu!! very cute choice.

not pictured but i got some duck poop oolong tea (鸭屎香) from convivial feast, and some room/linen sprays from the wicker club at the marketplace collective. the tea is really nice!! very light, not astringent at all, and has a hint of honey?? despite the name, there's actually no poop in the tea.

since there was barely any crowd over there (compared to afa, it was quite sad to see how empty the venue was), we managed to try almost all the scents from the wicker club. i settled on morning wood (clean, cucumber-y) and horny virgin (sweet, candy-like). also got a sampler size of juicy p*ssy (tropical, mango) as a freebie!! stinky room no more!!!

yeah don't ask me about the names. those aren't even the sussiest ones HAHA.

i also just wanted to tAKE A LOOK at the caseharden holidate bags bc they were having a pop up............. but i ended up ordering one. ( ꩜ ᯅ ꩜;) i'm now second guessing my choice of colour bc that colour was completely oos at the event so i never got to see the shade in person. the quality seemed pretty good though, and i like that the straps are adjustable. maybe i'll make a post when it arrives?? it's a preorder so it'll take a while to come.

bonus: miuA's orv merch has AR effects if you look at them through their respective instagram filters!!! insanely pretty animations!! unfortunately, they'll be removed in january next year, so i'm making this video to preserve them in my memories. (˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥)♡♡♡

(why are my hands so shaky aaaa)

[spaceagebachelorstan]

rtc headcannons because ive fallen deep into this musical

noel drinks from wine glasses and exclusively wine glasses

ocean has a fringe/bangs but doesnt know how to grow them out so she just pins them up with headbands

ricky has so many badges its a problem at this point. just buckets upon buckets of badges.

i am making them all autistic bcs im autistic and i need more autistic characters damnit

ocean has a special interest in politics and literary analysis

noel has a special interest in france, poetry media analysis

sometimes they discuss different films and books together and yes they get very heated over their wildly differing interpretations

ricky (obviously) has a special interest in space and cats, but also video games.

constance has a special interest in autism itself, flower language and art history

penny (be aware i have not seen legoland yet so take this with a pinch of salt) has a special interest in animals and mythology

mischa has a special interest in horror and rap, as well as linguistics

noel speaks pretty good french. he uses duolingo but he hates the notifications because they annoy him at the most random times

ricky uses all pronouns, no preference. and by all, i mean ALL. you could bring out the boink/boinkself pronouns and shed be chill with it

constance really likes hot chocolate with cinnamon and two shots of caramel in it

penny has mild heterochromia. one eye is green and the other is a darker green with a brown rim

ricky has an aac, but they all know at least basic sign language. theyre still learning

ocean stims by bouncing on her tiptoes. one time she fell over in the middle of a big speech because she tipped forward. she was fine but very embarrassed. noel was no help

noel's mother is from a french-speaking provenance/precinct (i think thats what theyre called)

mischa owns two hats, but flips them inside out so it looks like he owns more

noel has tried white wine. he doesnt want to admit it but he absolutely despises it

penny has textural issues with anything slimy. she tried a facemask once and almost broke the wall from slamming so far backwards into it.

mischa has talia's number memorised, but still keeps a litle slip of paper in his phone case with her number on it

ocean colour codes EVERYTHING. if even a single colour is out of place on anything she will spend ages trying to fix it

everything noel owns is very low contrast, and most of it is some variation of dark, desaturated reds and blues or monochrome

ricky owns a pair of purple cat ears

ocean isn't one for sweet things but adores chocolate oranges.

most of the time they all eat lunch together in the choir room

penny is a vegetarian bcs she doesnt like the texture of meat, ricky is a vegetarian because hes allergic to red meat

when ocean found out noel works at taco bell she spent a week going up to him at work just because. she still goes occasionally. noel dies inside a little bit more each time

noel actually managed to convince some other kid to day the second line in the nativity play. hes still proud of that one

mischa really likes rasberries

ricky loves to sleep in hammocks, but its a pain getting in and out of them so they dont do it often

noel's mother owns a lot of old french dvds which is how noel got into them

constance is very good at playing instruments, like harmonicas and flutes.

noel used to buy those fake sweet cigarettes all the time and pretend he actually smoked. he didnt like the flavour though. too chalky

mischa really likes palma violets.

penny doesn't watch movies often, but when she does she asks a lot of questions

noel really likes dramas, but he doesn't say so that often

for a bonding activity they all made bracelets for eachother, but none of them knew how. they picked who theyd make the bracelet for out of a hat. ocean researched before hand and made a nice flower chain for penny. penny made a green singlet with star beads for ricky. ricky made a red bracelet with "bad egg yt" on it for mischa. mischa made a purple and white bracelet for constance. constance made a black and red bracelet with a rose charm on it for noel. noel made an orange and blue bracelet with a shell charm and the word "lake" on it for ocean

penny wears hers and constantly fiddles with it. ocean keeps hers despite being annoyed by the word. mischa wears his often, but its slightly small so hes very careful to make sure it doesnt snap. noel keeps his on his bedside. ricky wrapped his around one of his crutches. constance wears hers often as well, and keeps it in a small box specifically for the bracelet.

noel stims by rubbing his fingers and fixing his collar

ricky has made an entire map of the solar system zolar is on. zey made it on a giant piece of a1 paper and hung it by his bed

ocean is scared of boats. the irony is not lost on anyone. however noel is also scared of boats, so he doenst make jokes

penny eats paper sometimes. not often, but often enough to concern the choir. she prefers plain and hates tissue paper

noel owns a large notebook for his favourite pieces of poetry/writing to be written in. it has a large design of roses and skulls on the front and is on a fancy textured cover. he keeps it in pristine condition and has shown exactly two people that it even exists. his mother and mischa

mischa sends noel song clips to review and noel sends him poetry snippets

constance and penny spend evenings at the cafe together, they do their homework there and they talk for hours once shes finished

penny and ocean are actually pretty close, those two and constance sit together in most lessons and convince the teacher to put them in a three for pair activities.

noel knows talia is real and they're actually friends. mischa is glad they get along and someone else believes shes real.

this led noel to learning some ukranian and talia learning some english to avoid the hells of google translate

ocean began learning french to spite noel but actually quite likes the language

constance really likes the count of monte cristo

mischa canmot finish books for the life of him. he begins reading, gets bored and remembers twelve weeks later he even knew of the book

there is a singular shitty library in uranium in st. cassians. its old and decrepit but the librarian is nice.

ocean volunteers after hours in the library on thursdays and fridays

ricky and penny watch animal documentaries together. they also spend a lot of timw with rickys cats. penny loves them

noel has tried that french whipped cream hot chocolate and loves it

ricky doesbt like throwing away her clothes so they sew the holes up with penny and ass little patches on them.

constance and penny read together and penny likes to help constance in the cafe with things like sweeping and clearing tables

mischa and ricky are bros. they watch sci fi together, and tend to watch a lot of scifi horror

noel and ocean hate eachother in the "you are genuinely so insufferable. i never want to talk to you, no, i dont even want to see you again. of course we're still on for saturday i'll meet you at ten, see you there" kind of way

penny dyed her hair blonde and noel dyes his hair black. his natural hair is a pretty dark brown but he likes his dark dark.

the choir hang out every saturday. they do things like hang at the cafe or go to the mall.

in an everyone survives au, none of them like cars that much after the rollercoaster

post canon penny hosts memorials and told talia about what happened. she was devastated, but penny felt she needed to know. she also managed to stop taco bell from making the hungry hombre meal

noel cannot stand fast food after working at taco bell because hes seen how its made.

noel is friends with a coworker, a woman in her late thirties who knew his mother briefly in highschool.

ocean cannot handle spice at all. she can barely hold her own against the lowest spice rating on a nandos menue

ricky talks to noel about zolar and all xeir ideas for it. noel is fascinated by just how detailed and extravagent it all it, so he ignores the sexy cat people

ricky convinced the rest of the choir to watch cats. there is now a mandatory background check before each movie on movie nights

ocean wears a lot of yellow and blue

because of oceans oarents, she has very limited internet access, so she normally uses a laptop her parents dont know about, courtesy of constance, at the cafe

constance writes fics on ao3. not often, but she does. shes pretty good at it ngl

noel's mother actually gave him the monique wig

when asked for a self portrait noel gives two- one of monique and one of him, often side by side

will probbaly do more later, maybe focused more on shipping and identity bcs i wanna make one on that

[afoxysunny]

So here's my Kuro Shinigamis x Miraculous Ladybug Au

I actually have a lot to say about this but imma just keep it short and snappy

The shinigami corp is now a superhero corp, training and dispatching miravulous holders instead of reapers. Depending on how good you did in training you'll get a stronger miraculous. Undertaker, the once in a generation prodigy, got the black cat but eventually grew bored of the monotonous work and deserted, taking the Miraculous with him. Only with Grell, next generation prodigy, they finally got another on his level and she earned the Ladybug. Dispatched to find and catch the stray cat her loyalty to the institute is challenged by Undertaker not only understanding her struggled but also being hot.

Yes, i ship it and you just gotta deal

I unfortunately don't have names for their gero personas. I think Undertaker can stay Undertaker bc graveyard cat? But idk

References and more info dumping under the cut

Just mishmashed these iconic poses together for the cat boy

I just had to shorten his coat and hair and boom, perfect outfit for him. The locket chain turns into little bells bc who needs to be stealthy. Bc he doesn't wear glasses his mask covers his mouth and i made it follow his scar bc i thought that'd be cool. Yes he has actual cat ears. With his super long nails included under his suit his hands don't look human and i love that for him

Kept Grell's silhouette for her outfit bc she's too iconic not to. Also her hair is shorter to see any of the design. Butler Grell is here bc i took the wispy hair from that design to stand in for bug like antenna. Yes she still has shark teeth i will rather die than take those away from her. Her mask is kinda in the shaoe of her glasses with two spots overstepping the shape to stand in for her cool skull beaded chain to hold said glasses. She has black eyes now, i swear i can explain . Instead of the chain she has at her hips that's where she parks her jojo weapon now

A pic of the show miraculous ladybug for all who need it

Translating my two fav reapers into ladybug and cat noir was so much easier than i thought bc it basically writes itself! Picture Undertaker swinging his baton real fast and with green action lines it looks like a scythe now, and the jojo in the show mostly spins for attacks anyways so that makes instant chainsaw vibe. And the summary up top you already read but can't you just imagine in their first confrontation like in black butler in book of the atlantic where Grell was confused about not cutting throigh Undertaker's weapon and he not so subtly tells her there's one thing a death scythe can't cut through? It can literally be the same conversation with the Miraculous Weapons!

Shinigamis in BB all have green eyes bc they're shinigamis but now they're superheroes so their eyes change colour to suit their miraculous if they're good enough. I also want the miraculous symbol to show up in their eye when they use their super power that's why both have an extra eye sketvhed next to them

I could go on forever, thanks for reading, if you wanna hear more I'm begging you to ask

[thecrimsondandelion]

I can't remember where I saw this or if it was from a fic, but Eddie not knowing how to do laundry due to Sonia flat out refusing to teach him– claiming something along the lines of "it's a woman's job, let mommy do it" just to keep him dependent on her. 

So, for a reddie hc, I couldn't stop thinking of them having a laundry date. It would probably be one of their first dates after heading to college. I can see them spending a good 45 minutes at the store beforehand going over soaps; Eddie smelling every single one, Richie helping him weigh his options of liquid, powder, beads, or pods & explaining the point of softener to his best ability. He'd step away to grab snacks and come back to find Eddie going back and forth between dryer sheets. 

Overall, Richie just patiently walking him through the day, and even calling Went & Maggie up at points to prove that he's not bullshiting him. 

(And mayyybe he does have a habit of overstuffing, and taking the shortcut of adding the softener & detergent in together after having forgotten to come back so many times– but Richie's got the gist of it / it's nothing Maggie can't talk Eddie out of) 

He'd ominously send "baby's first load ;)" to the losers group chat with no context only to send a video 2 minutes later of Eddie, pouting on his tiptoes, failing to pour softener into the correct compartment. 

Eddie would show up the following week with a step-stool to avoid the embarrassment of having Richie hoist him up while belting out the lion king opening again.

i love this hc, just Richie teaching Eddie to do household tasks (almost) completely joke free. like it’s Richie, he’s gonna tease a little, but he really wants to help Eddie have his sense of freedom, and wants to make it as comfortable and not embarrassing as possible

bc it isn’t Eddie’s fault

it’s why i always hc Richie being a great cook, Maggie and Went taught him lots growing up bc they wanted him to be independent and functional. Richie can bake bread, home made pasta sauces, can change a fuse too

Eddie tries to make him breakfast in bed on his birthday, and Richie wakes up to the smell of burning, and when he gets to the kitchen Eddie has frustrated tears in his eyes, and he’s apologising for ruining one of the frying pans. Eddie takes him out for breakfast instead, if it’s post-it Richie jokes about being Eddie’s trophy husband, bc Eddie is a little more boujee than Richie

Eddie probably gets easily frustrated when he can’t do something quickly. and Richie will take a pause to give him a kiss, or get a little handsy to distract him from the pissy mood

Richie had would be horrified by Eddie’s cutting skills, “Eddie, dude, my love. what the fuck are you doing, you’re gonna cut yourself, the claw grip technique!!! so you don’t lose your damn fingers!!!”

he’s incredibly patient, knows when to take a step back and let Eddie do something alone, let’s him make mistakes. bc there are things Richie sucks at, he’s not organised, leaves his underwear on the floor, let’s messes build up. And Eddie is super organised, he always remembers where Richie put things down, he’s meticulous when he cleans/washes dishes. He also knows everything to do with cars, Richie never has to go to a mechanic again, he can only identify a car by colour and shape. They both have strong qualities, and they balance each other. Richie just has to help with the stuff he never got taught

(this is a story stolen from my dad) Eddie once had an emotional breakdown bc he couldn’t get the sheets on his duvet (comforter? what’s it called in the US?) and he just could get it on, spent an hour trying to get the sheet on there, and ended up crying on the floor for 10 minutes, when he realises he bought sheets for a single instead of a double

Richie absolutely does laugh at him when he finds out, since Eddie already got over it by time Richie got home

Maggie has Eddie help bake cookies at Christmas time while Went and Richie put up the Christmas tree. and she recruits Richie and Eddie to both help prepare dinner, chopping veg, making homemade cranberry sauce. Eddie will always check the Toziers cars while he’s there too, and they tell him what a great son he is 🥺🥺🥺

thank you for the ask!!!!!!! please if you think of other stuff send as much as you like!!

[whenyouknowyouknow]

GOLDEN music video analysis

First of all, DISCLAIMER: These are merely the things that I noticed and what I think they could mean. I do not claim that these are H’s brain childs.

Second of all I might have written some stuff double, but I really wanted to publish this before TPWK drops. So YAY to that.

Third of all. Sorry this is really long ^^* Now lets start.

The two main parts that I noticed about the MV:

there is a shit ton of cuts

there are 7 different characters

Let’s have a look at the later first

THE CHARACTERS

In order of appearance

1. The Runner

1.1. clothes

white oversized shirt

half unbuttoned

shorts in soft sand and red colours, one of a kind feedsack shorts (hybrid seeds)

white (but dirty) canvas shoes with soft pink and white laces

gold cross necklace

1.2. symbolism

lots of skin visible through shorts, half-open shirt and shirt being half see-through = openness

canvas shoes are well worn and dirty = steadiness/consistency and loyalty/devotion

shorts: genuine hybrid seeds (Hybrid seeds are bred for higher yield and better resistance against pests and disease. Their seeds will not produce the same plant as the parent)

colours:

white - associated with light, goodness, innocence, purity, virginity, perfection

beige - neutral, calm, relaxing

pale pink - soothing

1.3. behaviour

main protagonist

runs after the camera

looks at the camera nearly all the time

Smiles/sings along/runs hard

chases camera, sometimes under strain but most often running with it

He is the thread that leads through the MV (appears a lot in the beginning, gets strewn in until the end, is the first and the last)

only one not wearing pearls

1.4. special moments

“I know you were way too (camera changes from full-frontal to frog perspective to show the bright sky) bright for me”

“loving you’s the antidote, golden” (greets away from camera)

2:35 not running (during the 28 goldens) ruffling hair and looking around as if uncertain how to proceed, “Because I’m so golden” turns and runs away from the camera, “You’re so golden” camera switches back to frontal

Gonna put the rest under the break because this thing got massive and long

2. Suited Up

2.1. clothes

light blue/turquoise blazer

shirt striped white and soft blue

tartan flares

white lace gloves (not always)

white (but dirty) canvas shoes with soft pink and white laces

gold cross necklace, light blue&white bead necklace (Millefiori+Freshwater pearls)

2.2. symbolism

patterned trousers - giving balance to the monochrome jacket, the pattern is very small, you have to look close to see it properly

striped shirt - two contrasting colours, stripes were historically used for outcasts and people that needed to be contained (servants, jesters, prostitutes, ...) in this case the contrast is low (white and light blue) and not always right away visible

non-formal suit, no tie, top buttons are open to reveal jewelry, sometimes with lace gloves - hides most of himself but not in an uptied way. There is a playfulness about it with the top buttons undone and the lace gloves that do cover his hands but also not. He plays peek-a-boo with how much he reveals

canvas shoes are well worn and dirty = steadiness/consistency and loyalty/devotion

Colours:

light blue - serenity, stability, inspiration, wisdom, calming, reliability but also sadness

white - associated with light, goodness, innocence, purity, virginity, perfection

brown - reliability, elegance, security, healing, home, grounding, foundations, stability, warmth, honesty

2.3. behaviour

goofy and expressive

lots of dad dancing and acting out musical parts

very flirty

   2.4. special moments

gloves: in the beginning and the gesturing along with the chimes

no gloves: dorky dancing and car hood flirting

“Of who I am and all I’ve ever known” dorky dancing

hides his hands when he flirts with the camera while singing “I don’t want to be alone” 

grinning dancing, camera twirls around him, he twirls and lands on a car hood, flirting with both people inside (they are not distinguishable), his foot is raised up coquettishly, pan around to his face, he smiles broadly

3. Car Driver

3.1. clothes

shirt striped white and light blue

lace gloves

light blue&white bead necklace (Millefiori+Freshwater pearls)

3.2. symbolism

the jacket is gone, leaving the striped shirt in full view

shirt not buttoned up

lace gloves - protection vs being open, purity vs debauchery

separated from camera through windshield - distancing himself from the onlooker

Colours:

light blue - serenity, stability, inspiration, wisdom, calming, reliability but also sadness

white - associated with light, goodness, innocence, purity, virginity, perfection

3.3. behaviour

does not smile

sings and seems mostly neutral and concentrated on driving

3.4. special moments

“take me back to the light” in tunnel, hard cut to outside tunnel, hard cut to inside tunnel emerging from tunnel

last line: “I don’t want to be alone”

4. Waterboy

4.1. clothes

swim shorts striped blue/off-white

gold cross necklace, blue beads necklace (Millefiori necklace+Freshwater pearls)

4.2. symbolism

lots of skin, open hands stretched out towards camera - very open

barefoot - innocence/childhood, freedom from real-life requirements

switch from light blue to a stronger blue (necklace and shorts) - emphasize on that colour

Colours:

blue - serenity, stability, inspiration, wisdom, calming, reliability but also sadness

white - associated with light, goodness, innocence, purity, virginity, perfection

4.3. behaviour

only one depicted in 3 different ways (1. outside of water filmed from inside water, 2. inside water filmed from inside the water, 3. inside water filmed from outside the water)

outside of water: squatting, facing the camera, strong gestures and mimic, slightly crazy

inside the water: diving, sinking, floating, often with eyes shut

Water is used as something to either hide in (camera) or be surrounded with (H)

4.4. special moments

first appearance: “I don’t want to be alone” reaches for and sings to the camera (which is under water and peaking out) “I don’t want to be alone” dives into the water

“I can feel it take a hold” under water, only eyes above waterline and out of view from the camera

“out of my head” starts shaking his head crazily “and I know that you’re scared because hearts get broken” camera sinks deeper under water, when it’s under, H hits the water

“I know that you’re scared because I’m so OPEN” hits the water

5. Fishermans Hat

5.1. clothes

yellow fisherman’s hat

Cross necklace, white bead necklace (Millefiori+Freshwater pearls)

long flared trousers beige with blue flower print

brown belt

white (but dirty) canvas shoes with soft pink and white laces

5.2. symbolism

first appearance of yellow, only hints of blue in the fine flower print

upper body naked, lower body completely covered - ambivalence between showing and not showing but very clearly divided. Covered parts are not guessable bc even the form is hidden

Colours:

yellow - most luminous colour, stands for happiness, optimism, enlightenment, creativity, sunshine but also betrayal and cowardice

blue - serenity, stability, inspiration, wisdom, calming, reliability but also sadness

5.3. behaviour

either pressing his lips together or mouthing along to the instrumentals

swaying to the music

stands on various places on the shore rocks in different distances

lots of cuts

5.4. special moments

only appears during the 28 goldens and the following “Because I’m so open”

only once turned away from the camera 2:38 (extremely short cut, only visible if slowed down to the max)

6. Crystal ball

6.1. clothes

nail polish gold/silver

white beret with black bow/trim

Cross necklace, white bead necklace (Millefiori+Freshwater pearls)

6.2. symbolism

only clothing is the hat, crystal ball is center - technically very open but what you see is upside down and distorted

he holds the crystal ball himself - the distortion and turning upside down of what we see is in his hands

Colours:

white - associated with light, goodness, innocence, purity, virginity, perfection

6.3. behaviour

being upside down

sings along

only fast cuts to him

6.4. special moments

first appearance after “Because hearts get broken”

last appearance “I know that you’re scared because I’m so open” (analysis of that part in the extras)

7. Reflection

7.1. clothes

swim shorts

7.2. symbolism

the person itself is only seen in contour and upside down - no real information and lots of distortion and distraction (upside down, reflection on the water, tinted red and yellow, clouds and stones mix into the picture)

Colours:

yellow - most luminous colour, stands for happiness, optimism, enlightenment, creativity, sunshine but also betrayal and cowardice

blue - serenity, stability, inspiration, wisdom, calming, reliability but also sadness

red - love, lust, sexuality, sensitivity, romance, joy, strength, leadership, courage, anger, danger, malice, wrath, determination

7.3. behaviour

this could be the 4th version of the Water Boy but as there are so many differences I put him extra

we only ever see the dark reflection of him

always upside down

dances in swaying motions

7.4. special moments

the whole composition looks a bit like an eye

appears 3 times during the 28 goldens

Constants in all roles are:

silver and golden nail polish

Both stand for wealth

silver additionally stands for kindness, psychic abilities and is believed to be the mirror to the soul, helping us to see ourselves as others see us

gold associated with illumination, love, compassion, courage, magic and wisdom but also sparkle and glamour

golden cross necklace

pearls (and Millefiori beads in light blue or blue)

only the Runner doesn’t wear them (it’s not clear for the Reflection but based on the shorts I’d say the styling is the same as for the Waterboy)we all know how H is wearing pearls now basically everywhere so him wearing them in the MV is no surprise

Pearls are said to attract wealth and luck, offer protection, balance karma, strengthen relationships, symbolize purity, generosity, integrity, loyalty, used for purifying wate

The millefioriare glas beads that depict flowers. Flowers symbolize fertility, health, flourishing

these necklaces are pretty and colour coordinated to the outfits but they also seem to be a blessing

when there are shoes it’s white (but dirty) canvas shoes with soft pink and white laces

which can stand for steadiness/consistency and loyalty/devotion

Main themes

a journey that starts in a tunnel and ends on a open road, both (beginning and ending) are unprovoked

conflict between openness and secrecy, how much is shown and how much of that is the reality?

Now to the cuts

The editing of the video is brilliant and hides so many little tidbits that I fear that I have seen only half of them (I meantioned the most noticable ones in the Roles), so here goes nothing

There are 156 cuts

The highest concentration of cuts is during the 28 goldens until “Because I’m so open.”

The biggest cluster of cuts is at 2:43 (7 cuts) and 2:44 (6 cuts) “Because I’m so open”

All cuts visualized

Runner - skin tone

Suited Up - royal blue

Car Driver: Tunnel - dark red, Outside - sky blue

Waterboy: Outside - pale green, Under Water - dark green, In Water - bluish green

Crystal Ball - brown

Fishermans Hat - yellow

Reflection - purple

The last dark red cut should be morphing into a sky blue (just couldn’t figure out how to do that)

The lead up to the climax starts shortly after the first appearence of the crystal ball (5th row from the bottom)

the 28 Goldens start with the Suited Up blue in the same row

All appearences of the Fichermans Hat are only during the 28 Goldens and in the climax

Now let’s talk about the climax

the 28 Goldens end with the last appearence of the Reflection (purple)

The following 5 seconds are the climax

Cristal ball “I know” Suited up (full body, looking to the right, lips pressed together, steps forward)

“That you’re scared” Runner (stands,looks at camera, hands on hips)

“Be” Suited Up (portrait, looks at camera, slightly upwards)

“cause” Suited Up (portrait, looks at camera, slightly downward)

“I” Crystal ball

“‘m”

Suited Up (portrait, looks at camera slightly downwards)

Waterboy (in water, head above, hands strechted out to a V)

Fishermans Hat (half body, raising arms, head tilted to the right)

“so” Crystal ball (lowering the Crystal ball)

“o”

Waterboy (in water, head above, hands slowly sinking, moving head backwards as if cheering)

Crystal ball (without Crystal ball, comes into focus)

Waterboy (in water, head above, moving head backwards as if cheering, wave rolls into the focus, Waterboy not visible)

Crystal ball (without Crystal ball)

Crystal ball (super short flicker, with Crystal ball again)

“pen” Waterboy (outside water, hits the water)

Runner (turnes away from camera and runs away)

So what is the story? At first it might look as if all the different characters are random and the MV only being about a nice summer day, singing about a love and not having an underlying story but when we look deeper there is a lot to unpack.

When we look at the distribution of how much time each character got and when which character was the focus it becomes clear that the Runner is the main protagonist. He is the one that starts us off, carries us through and brings it to the end. He quite literally runs us through the MV. He is the red thread tying it all together. He is also the only one not wearing pearls, which sets him apart from all the characters but also from H himself.

Looking at the other characters he is one of only two that actually smile. But while the Suited up character is, well... suited up, literally hiding most parts of himself from the viewer, even going as far as wearing gloves, the Runner is wearing loose clothes, short or see through and not buttoned up. He is showing quite a lot of himself and he is not self conscious about it or coquettish or anything really because he is focusing on running. Pulling us through the music video by running towards us(?), the camera, really. He is also not chasing. There are parts where he pushes himself to run faster but it’s never a chase. Always running with the camera.

The only time he breaks the pattern is during the instrumental part, the 28 Goldens, where he stops running, looking around as if questioning where to go. He picks back up running directly after the climax “I know that you’re scared because I’m so open” but this time he runs away from the camera as if choosing a different path. Because maybe he doesn’t want the other to be scared and choses to go back or maybe he wasn’t actually open and wants to change that by retracing his steps. But with the next cut to him he is again running towards the camera. It’s not clear if anything changed and then he just stops running. The camera getting further away from him. He looks on, there are no sad feelings.

Of all the other characters only one shows no signs of hiding anything.

Suited up is dorky, expressive and flirty while also playing with the contrasts of a full suit but a not fully buttoned shirt, with lace gloves that hide him but also give peeks of him, with hiding his hands behind his back while flashing his dimpled smile. He looks genuine, he probably is ... to some extent. There are parts of himself that he doesn’t show but he is charming about it. Playing with it.

The Driver hides behind his windshield, also wearing the lace gloves but he is not charming or even smiling. He drives. Somewhere. He definitely drives from the dark tunnel into the light while singing “take me back to the light” and he ends his appearances with the words “I don’t want to be alone”. He shows us his vulnerable side by telling us his hopes but there is no deep connection, he keeps a distance.

The Fishermans hat seems open and for a certain part he is, a bare chest with all his history etched into his skin is quite clearly open. But his lower body is so effectively covered, we can’t even see the exact shape of his legs due to the trousers cut, or if he is even wearing any shoes. that it feels like a statement of “yes you can see part of me but the other part I keep absolutely hidden.” He keeps his lips well pressed together. Jumping closer and further back again with each cut. Making it hard to place him or foresee what to expect next.

The Crystal ball is a study in hiding. Yes the part of the body we see is naked and seems very open, but it’s also upside down and distorted by the ball that he holds himself. And even the part of the climax where he lowers the ball to reveal himself ends in a short flicker of the ball being back, distortion in place. That is the last appearance of this character.

The Reflection is by far the most mysterious. We don’t see anything of him except for his outline. He is a reflection in a pond, distorted and tinted by the other reflections and the stones under water as well as the whole scene being tinted by red and orange. There is no way to get any real information from that one.

And then there is the Waterboy. The one in just swim shorts. The one pulling faces at something, someone, in the water. The one talking directly to the camera “and I know that you’re scared because hearts get broken” while the camera sinks lower. The one jumping into the water “I don’t want to be alone” and “I can feel it take a hold” while being under water. There is no clarification who he is talking too/about but it is clear that he wants to be close and closer. Wants to surround himself with it. This openness is especially stark as every other side character is a version of hiding in some way or the other.

The clash of all those characters hiding, distorting, playing peek-a-boo with how much they reveal and how much of their personality is reality and that one honest open character that wants someone so much that he is diving for them. Disregarding all the other characters because he is the one that scares the other by being open.

And still the last side character making an appearance is the one suited up, he smiles and is charming, flirting with people that can’t be seen, we can see them waving and really they could be anyone that wants his attention. He twirls, drapes himself over the hood of their car, letting his dimples pop, delicately placing his chin in his hand and raising his foot. It’s the longest continuous scene in the music video and is followed only by the Runner stopping to run, ending his part of escorting us through the story.

[toneelspeelster]

david’s room

i saw a small request by @feingeister for a talk on david’s room and like, i couldn’t resist. i’ve talked about food before so a room isn’t that weird. right?

in any case, the first thing i’d like to mention is that david’s room? it is humongous. 

matteo is in the front but look at how far away david’s study/art corner is. what i like about this particular shot is that it already indicates a few things; david likes earthy tones in his room and david likes Big Things (like big windows and big lamps) and industrial objects are a thing (see that big lamp on the left). i also see a big painting (?) on his wall and i wonder if it’s something david made himself - the other drawings in his room seem to be, but they’ve always been small. so maybe he’s been experimenting in his art too!

next up is the next shot, and honestly - a pretty vague, but what i do appreciate is the beaded detail and the plants. plants pop up in both matteo and david’s rooms (imagine them discussing growing plants together) but david appreciates the flair of a Big Plant. 

now this shot though: it assembles everything together in what david’s room is, for me. he hasn’t touched his walls at all, there’s no real paint and there’s cracks in it, but i do think david made the conscience decision not to tinker with it. he probably can’t afford to in any case but also - he’s nifty. he takes stuff from outside and brings it in; as is the case with what seems to be the iron fence in this shot; he must’ve cleaned it and decided to use it as a decoration for a wall. he once again uses his love of plants and his arts, something that is clearly very personal to him. he makes the room feel lived in - the room itself is breaking apart but the stuff in it is very significant to him as a person and i think he’s got a story for every thing he brought in. 

no artist’s room is complete with an Artist Table with Artsy Stuff. once again, his love for industrial and earthy colours shine through. perhaps the only things he actually spent money on although i suppose a lot of things in here can also be seen as something he took from the outside! his table is in front of the window too (whereas matteo’s table is kind of randomly in the middle of his room); it gives him natural lighting to use when drawing i suppose; and maybe immediate inspiration too. as we might see in the next shot. 

another shot of his art. this is david probably being one of those artists who go outside to walk around, pick a spot, and start drawing. he’s only got three drawings on it as of yet, but it seems like this is gonna be his Drawings Wall. these don’t necessarily seem to be sketches either; he even used more colour than he did before matteo came into his life. 

neither of david’s bedding covers seem to be very Ikea-esque (like what Most People would have); so he’s got an eye for special bedding. especially the left one is something i can see being gifted to david by someone in his family, or maybe his godmother. once again, the earthy colours, but then there’s blue too! interestingly enough, you’d maybe see this as something that clashes but it’s the industrial colours (blue/greyish) mixing with the earthy colours, with patterns. and it turns out: matches quite well! (like a metaphor for david and matteo i suppose lol). 

okay so finally my true thoughts come out: how fucking enormous is david’s bed? it looks like it can fit five people in there. i don’t know why he’d hang out in matteo’s room all the time when he has this Bed for Giants with Four Pillows to use. how Lavishly Big. the ok.cool squad would want a sleepover party. but i digress. apparently both matteo and david got hot bc the white sheet they use the night before is No More. i want to call your attention to david’s side though; it seems like he’s got a picture there - it’s pretty impossible to see what’s on it but maybe a picture of himself? also, once again; david does something nifty! his bedside table is actually a sound box. can you imagine him finding this outside, cleaning it up, and repurposing it like this? 

that’s what makes david’s room what it is. his room actually indicates something about him that he himself might have never thought about himself: even though he feels like running and he never might be able to find a place that he can call home - he’s actually pretty adept into making a room, a space, a home from a room that on the surface looks like it needs a lot of patchwork into a space that is intrinsically him. it’s not what the room is, it’s what he brings into it that makes it a home. it’s not without reason that we finally saw his room when he really allowed matteo in. matteo is part of that too. 

[saint-patrice]

Tbh I would like to have the 34 *other* Bergy pics on your shortlist, complete with commentary lolol. And then (if you’re still waiting that is) any other Marchy pics with commentary? xD xD

oh my godddd you are my favourite person anon - ask and ye shall receive 😎 i should maybe warn that while this doesn’t have actual nsfw content you probably wouldn’t want to read this to your kids as a bedtime story. anyway, here we go: 

this was very close to making the original list. i like the soft lighting and the kind of floofy hair, yet he still looks like he could absolutely fuck me up (both like in a fight and various other ways). this photo gets me thinking some thoughts ™ if i am being honest

a literal saint and god amongst men right here. his brown eyes are so soft and his little smile puts me at ease. this is a man who would treat me right (fact). this photo is also from quite deep into the playoffs so the beard is going a little wild, and whilst i’m glad it isn’t like this all of the time, i very much appreciate it when it’s around.

O CAP’N MY CAP’N (sorry zee). nah for real this exudes some real sexy alternate energy. if i were on the opposing team and i saw this formidable man just skating around looking like that i think i’d just go back down the tunnel and hide in the locker room. this man will fucking kneecap you for the sake of a goal if that’s what it takes. and then i remember that it’s patrice and he’s the nicest man alive and he would literally never, but that’s still the energy this image has. and i ain’t saying i don’t like it.

okay this is just cute. they look like 2 dads who aren’t entirely sure how to take a selfie but are willing to try. the outfits lend this a slightly chaotic energy - i can’t commend zee’s colour combo if i’m honest, and when juxtaposed with the plaid shirt it kind of hurts my head. but it adds to the dad energy so i still love it. also this is from chara’s ig and the caption is super sweet.

DADS WITH THEIR KIDS ALWAYS GETS ME. i don’t even want kids, nor do i particularly like them, but seeing a man with his child is the cutest thing in the world and this, predictably, is no exception. patrice’s son 100% has his eyes which is really cute. speaking of patrice’s eyes, he may be smiling here but if you look into his eyes all you will see is fear - that child does not appear too bothered about remaining upright on the ice, and i suspect thay bergy is concerned about this. it would be criminal for me to not comment on the jeans. bergy has some exceptional thighs as these jeans do an excellent job of highlighting that.

this is Hot, and i’m not accepting criticism on that opinion. the crisp white shirt w no jacket or tie, and the top buttons undone???? i need a lie down. the hands are also making a nice appearance which i can always appreciate. basically what i’m saying is that i’m jealous of that snake this is an excellent photo and i owe the bruins instagram person a drink for posting it.

do you remember when i said bergy had marvellous thighs? well take a fucking sip babes - they’re like tree trunks carved out of carrara marble. if i have to die i want it to be because they crushed my skull. this is also one of the clearest photos i’ve seen of his tattoo, so it has that going for it too ( sidenote if anyone has an image with literally a pixel of his tattoo pls send it my way, i’m getting desperate at this point). i also think men in jewellery is a good look so i’m digging his beaded bracelets and silver chain. fantastic picture all round.

yeah okay there’s no escaping that the main reason this one made the list is 🍑. it’s exquisite. those pants also do a great job on the thighs too. the hair, socked feet (no i dont have a fetish i just think ppl in their socks with no shoes is kind of funny), and hands get an honourable mention

is this the only picture that has ever mattered? i’d believe it. patrice just lovingly gazing down at his son giving his hockey husband a handshake? you just can’t beat it. i have also been emotionally ruined by that tiny #37 jersey oh my

in the interest of being polite, i will describe this look as rugged. he has probably objectively looked better but i just like this photo and awful lot.

i don’t think i can give any commentary on this without saying something genuinely not suitable for public eyes. the 2 things i will say are: the only thing keeping me going completely feral horny looking at this is those pants,, if they were black or navy i’d be dead; and patrice i am begging you to do up a few more buttons on your shirt or remove it completely or i’m not going to live much longer.

oh man i just love this??? i can’t even explain why. the lack of much beard and the expression in his eyes just makes him look massively soft - i would give him a kiss on the nose and a cuddle in this photo

(gif via @gaudreau) i am slightly loathe to admit this bc it sounds weird but cuts and bruises can sometimes be a real look so this checks that box for me. his smile when he talks truly is one of the finer things in life too. also the lil shrug. i love you mr pikachu

a** fantastic **angle. this is just prime beautiful bergy.  excellent level of beard imo, the lighting shows off his v nice bone structure, and the nose is looking fab as always. weird observation of the day is that his neck looks nice in this

i mean obviously this had to go in - lord knows it’s fucking iconic. i have so many questions about how this situation came to be (aside from the fact that alcohol was involved. did brad initiate it? or patrice? why are they spinning? what the fuck? how the fuck? why was i not invited?) but anyway, this photo increased my thirst for a shirtless bergy photo at least two-hundredfold. at this point it’s a need not a want. i don’t think i can continue to comment on this without straying into nsfw territory so we’ll leave it at that. oh the things i would do

classic humble patrice making an appearance here, reminding us that he is not only the most handsome bastard to ever walk planet earth, but he’s a great guy too. just can’t hate him. and boy is he handsome in this gif. excellent stubble (im really invested in his facial hair if you hadn’t noticed), and the smile that could melt even my cold heart on display here. also bonus points for the previously mentioned thing about cuts/bruises. (sorry). i love this one 

in contrast to some of the prior ones, this picture is so cute that i can make nothing but pg comments about it. this is exactly the same face we all make when someone points a camera at us and says “cheese!” and i love that. the man looks good in white. good, wholesome content right here.

(gif via @weekendatbergysblog) okay the baby is cute but the fucking headband is what gets me in this. i’m able to make no further comment because this short circuits my brain.

(gif via @davidpastrnut)when i first saw this gif i had to go find the source video because i didn’t believe he actually said that but i’m here to tell you: he did. i love these hockey husbands so much. also i saw this tagged as “# hot waiter” one time and i still haven’t got over how accurate that is. someone more talented than me, i’m begging you for that fucking au 

(gif via @gaudreau) can patrice please stop looking up ??? it’s unfair that someone can look so good just looking in a direction what the fucK. he’s so stunning.

i love this one. brad pulling his hoodie down like that looks like he’s... soliciting and honestly who could blame him. bergy looks very cute, if a bit edgy in the all black. the hand is a treat in this one hooooooooooooooooo yes

this one show’s off patrice’s dark features very well. it’s amazing how he has such dark hair, dark eyes, big dark eyebrows, and dark facial hair, yet it doesn’t overcrowd or shadow his face ( except occasionally in awful lighting) ??? does anyone actually know how that works?? he’s looking very pensive here, and that hoodie looks oh-so-cosy. absolutely would cuddle.

**how cute is this y’all. **in case you thought you were just missing something, no, patrice is not sitting on a chair. he’s just maintaining that deep squat like a champ. maybe that’s the secret to his sublime thighs... the navy/deep red is an excellent look on him, and we get a rare glimpse of bergy with his wedding ring, which i find to be oddly cute. bonus points for him being beside a very cute kid too :)

(gif via @jakedebrask) this, i, ummmmm. i- uhh. just. um. yeah. so like. uhhhh... swiftly moving on

(gif via @davidpastrnut) this motherfucker and his handsome fucking face even looks good in that god-awful wooly patriots hat. honestly it looks like he’s about to go out and have a snowball fight (presumably with brad). decidedly rather domestic and i love it

(gif via @davidpastrnut) intense media patrice is intense. this is such a classic bergy face though, i love it. every time some media person asks him some big long question he puts on this exact very-invested-and-slightly-concerned face, its iconic. looking cosy in a hoodie once again. stop it. 

nice polo, dude

(gif via @davidpastrnut) that tshirt looks like its fighting for its life to contain those biceps. a dark, brooding patrice that has some sort of slow burn au stirring deep in my mind. from other angles in this interview the tattoo is fairly visible also.

this has such a strong energy it almost knocked me off my feet. again, i can see this being some sort of business or maybe criminal masterminds au. but fuck me, does that man looking something beautiful in a suit. the one hand in the pocket is quite frankly BDE too. i’m glad i’m not into dadkes or esle i think this whole picture would be too much for me.

he is literally the kind of man you’d want to bring home to your parents. i’m glad he seems to have cashed in on the navy/deep red combo because it really does suit him. he looks so fucking dapper here i may be very much in love

another excellent on-ice shot of him, albeit his slightly concerned expression. the beard is looking fucking crisp here hello sir. not much else to say on this, just a handsome, handsome boy.

(gif via @jeffsamardzija) another one that gives me Thoughts. he’s literally so beautiful. hair is cut a little shorter than usual on the sides and on anyone else it would scream fuckboy but i’m kind of digging it on bergy, at least on this one occasion. if i say anything else we’ll go down the rabbit hole

oof this is_ intense. _bergy aside, this is just an incredible shot tbh. rare that we get to see mr perfect not completely level-headed and playing it cool so it feels like a treat when we do. lowkey hot ngl

last but very certainly not least, mr patrice bergeron, four-time bergeron award winner, holding the award itself. this photo honestly just makes my heart swell a little with pride - it’s what he deserves!!!! just absolutely dapper in a beautiful suit as always, and a smile that could topple a nation to round it all off.

thank you so much for this anon!!! it was rather self-indulgent but i hope you like it :) also i will absolutely do another one with marchy, although my nails have been dry for about 2 hours now so i’ll probably do it tomorrow or friday, but it’s on its way :)

[thisisnotawonderland-blog1]

Christmas Confessions

@itsbuckysworld secret Santa for @imbrium-barnes: Bucky Barnes x hijabi!reader

Pure Christmas fluff. No warnings.

A/n: okay so @imbrium-barnes I looked at ur blog and there seemed to be someone else asking abt the stuff in ur wish list?? ( I asked abt celebrating holidays) Idk if your doing two separate ones or there was a mistake, but I wrote this for u! It’s quite short, but I hope u enjoy!

Feedback is appreciated! Especially abt any inaccuracies bc I’m not a part of this religion, so I obviously don’t know lots of things abt it.

Y/N knocked on the door, carefully evading the wreath that Bucky had put up, and smoothed down her dress. After a second or two, she was greeted by Bucky, a Captain America apron had been thrown on over his shirt, and hair in a man-bun; she couldn’t help but think he looked adorable. He welcomed her in, explaining that the nut-roast would be ready in a couple of minutes.

Y/N helped to lay the table, and poured the drinks, thanking Bucky for getting a vegetarian meal.

As they ate, she found herself wondered why Bucky didn’t go to the compound today —- everyone else was there. After a few minutes of thought, she decided it was probably because he’s still adjusting, and didn’t want to spend Christmas with everyone else.

“What’s troubling you?” He asked, concern etched on his face.

“You could be doing anything right now, why are you spending your first Christmas of this century with me?” Y/N asked, and he chuckled.

“Because I want to. I’d rather spend it with you than with Stark and Sam and Nat and Steve and all the rest of ‘em.”

“Even Steve?”

“Of course. I lo... I value you as a friend, and a good one at that.”

His slight stutter did not go unnoticed, “thanks Buck.”

“I know you don’t celebrate Christmas, but I got you something.” He said, and she looked up from her food.

“You didn’t have to.” She blushed, turning to face him as he grabbed a package.

“I know.” He smiles and hands her the package.

She undoes the ribbon carefully, and the wrapping paper falls away. Inside there are three beautiful scarves. One is a deep emerald colour, with patterned details in swirls and loops; there’s a dark red one, with golden details; the last scarf is a rich navy, patterned with silver beads. “I, uh, thought you could use them for your hijabs.” He stuttered.

“Bucky, these are beautiful! I love them, they are so pretty! I’m going to wear them all the time!” She gushed excitedly. “Oh! I got you something too!” She rummaged around in her bag for a couple of seconds, then pulled out a parcel too.

He took the parcel carefully, and peeled away all the sellotape, careful not to rip the paper.

When he looked inside he saw ser of books —- classics that he’d been recommended to by people. She’d known he felt upset and frustrated that he didn’t get lots of references. “I was thinking we could also do a couple of movie marathons to catch you up too. I know you hate... not knowing what everyone else does.”

-

Twenty minutes into ‘Muppets Christmas Carol’ (a film that she’d seen many times, despite not celebrating the holiday) Y/N was beginning to drift off into a light sleep, the comfort of a warm blanket and Bucky’s body lulling her towards unconsciousness. She felt her eyes closing when Bucky chuckled.

“Tired doll?” he smirked, and she glanced up at him.

“Mmm...” she nodded, and he laughed. “Buck, earlier, when I asked why you wanted to spend time with me today, you started to say something but stopped yourself. You’re not doing this because you don’t want be to be left out in the celebrations, are you?”

“God no! I’m so, so sorry if you thought that! That was not the case at all!” He tried to assure her.

“What were you going to say?” She asked.

“I, I... I love you.” He said finally, “not in a friend way.”

He felt as if a tonne of bricks had been lifted off his shoulders, but a fear of rejection filled him too; on the other hand, she wanted to dance and sing with joy (as cringey as it sounded).

“Well that’s just great for me then,” she smiled shyly.

“R-really?” He could feel himself shaking.

“Yeah. I love you too; I love you so much, James Buchanan Barnes.”

[priincesspacificaarchive]

💍 + Elipper *

WEDDING MEME||ACCEPTING 

[under the cut bc it’s looonngg.]

where they get married 

gf probs??? outside. there’s a a chuppah, and elise+her side of the wedding party are wearing yellow and flower crowns (except elise is wearing white i guess?) the chuppah has daisies and the crowns are made of daisies. 

when they get married ( ie what time of day, what month and season etc. )

it’s summer, daytime, maybe early june. like when they first met or something else rly sappy.  

what traditions they include ( do they get married under a chuppah and crush a glass, garter toss, ‘something borrowed, something blue,’ etc. ) 

they definitely try very hard to combine their two traditions. i’ve always loved the idea of the pines family being jewish and with pacifica and elise being puerto rican and wanting to reconnect with their own heritage i think it’d make perfect sense for them to try and combine their two traditions. like there’s a chuppah, but the flowers on it are daisies and ampola flowers. elise carries a fan, but she and dipper also circle each other. they sign a ketubah, with their twin sister’s signing as witnesses. dipper’s parents walk him to the chuppah, but paz walks elise since their parents are in jail. they break a glass and cheer “mazel tov”. there’s the bedeken. the Seven Blessings are read, and soft music is played as in puerto rican tradition. not only do i love cultures in general, but i love blending them, and i think elise and dipper would try very hard to incorporate their heritage into their wedding. obviously i’m neither of these things, but i’ve done some minor research and i’m hoping these are accurate. (google don’t fail me now.) 

what their wedding cake looks likes 

it’s pineapple flavored, as puerto rican custom decides. and white with blue and yellow seashells. i was originally gonna ind a cake thing and try to make it but honestly i’m too tired of these things i just want them out of my drafts!

….who smashes cake into whose face 

elise in dipper’s first, then he goes to feed her a piece all nice like and smashes it into her nose to keep from ruining her hair or makeup too much. boy knows that shit takes WORK.

who proposed to who firsts

lowkey wanna say elise at least brought it up first. dipper def got the ring and officially proposed first.

who walks down the aisle and who waits at the altar ( or neither )

dipper is walked to the chuppah ahead of elise by his parents, then elise follows being guided by pacifica.

what their wedding dresses / suits / other look like

elise’s is white with yellow accents and it’s just long and flowy and soft looking with minimal beading/embroidery.

what their wedding colour scheme is and what sort of decor they have

light yellow and probably light blue? like sky blue and sunflower yellow. idk about decor okay i’m cLUELESS ABOUT WEDDING DECOR.

what flowers are in the bouquet ( if applicable. bonus: what do the flowers mean?)

daffodils (meaning new beginnings) and forget-me-nots (meaning, well, forget me not), wrapped in baby’s breath (meaning everlasting love) (sunflowers mean false riches and yellow roses mean infidelity so those were NOS) there’s also ampola, as tradition states, and elise also carries an ampola fan.

what their vows are ( eg poetry, traditional, improvised etc. )

they def had they’re own vows but dipper’s ended with “i promise to be your earth and your sky forever.” and elise’s was like “i promise to be your sun and your flame, forever and ever

if anyone’s late to the wedding

it’s gideon bc he didn’t wanna come xD no fr it’s probably no one. everyone they invite is very excited to see them get married so they wouldn’t try to be disrespectful like that.

who’s in the bridal parties / groomsmen / other

elise has paz and robbie, dipper has wendy and mabel. robbie and wendy get paired up but they havent been together in half of forever so they dont care. tbh robbie’s probs married to tambry w a baby on the way by now lets face it. and elise only picked him bc she knew he’d be easier to pair w wendy. also sorry dip u have no friends outside the galaxy square. (psst, actually none of them do bc fuck it i’m no good w npcs.)

what their bridal party / groomsmen / other are wearing

paz’s bridesmaid dress is soft and flowy and bright yellow with a daisy flower crown. robbie/mabel/wendy are wearing black tuxes with ties that match the bridesmaid dress. everyone is wearing a daisy flower crown. except dipper.

who gives speeches at the reception ( bonus: what do they say? recount a sweet memory or two between them? tell an embarrassing story? )

pacifica talks about how she’s watched their love blossom since they were twelve, mabel tells embarrassing stories about some of the adventures they went on together. the mic is then opened to the floor and gideon and stan rush it to tell embarrassing stories next. stan’s turns tearful when he talks about dipper finally becoming a man. it’s a very emotional day.

who catches the bouquet( s )

candy. who promptly looks at her date with “oh shit” eyes.

what their wedding photos are like ( are they sweet, with the couple holding hands or kissing or ~gazing into each others eyes~? are they silly, with a snapshot of the ‘cake-smash’ moment? or are they artistic, with one of them facing the sunset or holding their bouquets? )

most of them are sweet, pictures of them smiling and laughing together. there’s photos of the cake smashing, dipper gives her a piggyback ride in her dress and heels in one. some of them are silly. capturing goofy faces they make at each other to get them to laugh. it’s like taking pictures of the essence of their relationship. they put them in an actual album that mabel helps with.

what sort of food they have at the reception

they probably try to continue to combine their traditions by using some of purto rico’s local dishes and some traditional jewish dishes. (look i’m doing some minor research here okay. if i keep googling this stuff my family’s gonna think i’m secretly engaged or something.)

who cries first during the ceremony

it’s definitely a close tie but it’s dipper, cause he sees her first. then elise. then mabel. then paz. then stan is bawling in his seat but like. in a manly way. also soos is crying.

how wild their reception gets ( who dances the best, who gets drunk first, etc. )

mabel and elise set off ffirecrackers and almost get arrested. thank god for sheriff blubbs and deputy durland. toby determined crashed and got shitfaced and tore up the dancefloor. paz and elise danced together instead of a father/daughter dance, which they’d done for pacifica’s wedding the day before. they had a joint celebration dinner the night before that. robbie and tambry like, barely left each other’s sides but it’s fine bc dipper barely left elise’s. they had one of those photobooths and the main four spent like hours getting amazing pictures. those ALSO go in the album.

what their rings are like

simple gold bands. elise’s wedding ring is probably the ring dipper gifted her during the ceremony. her engagement ring is a gold band with a white diamond center surrounded by yellow accent diamonds.

what sort of favours they have ( heart shaped sparklers, mini champagne bottles, personalised candy etc. )

they definitely had something sun and sky-themed. idk what tho. also they passed out capias for puerto rican tradition.

where they go for their honeymoon

they go camping out in some really nice woods and like, mountain-y area. elise fucking loves it.

something memorable that happens during the party / ceremony ( do they run out of ice and someone goes to get it in full formal wear on foot, does anyone fall asleep in the middle of the party, etc. )

its gf so lots of things happen but tbh the most memorable is people drunkenly asking the twins (even w their VERY different hair) why they’re not dancing w so-and-so and still getting them confused. also if anyone is running out for ice in full formal wear its robbie bc ngl that shits hILARIOUS to my currently sleep-addled brain.

who officiates the ceremony

i want it to be mayor tyler for some reason

what song their first dance is to

‘close to you’ by the carpenters bC IM A SUCKER FOR IT. also the soft sound is too perfect for elipper im cry. if not that it’d be a soft live rendition of “i can’t help (falling in love with you)” bc that’s literally on the elipper playlist.

who gives who away as they walk down the aisle

as it’s a chuppah it’s dipper and then elise. (ngl i love all this tradition stuff i feel like my wedding is gonna be some boring christian traditional thing and that makes me wanna cry bruh.)

[imerian]

My (very old) loscar brooch (?) that i just now made doodles for

More pictures under cut

[attina-the-responsible]

JEFF Triton -- Character Sheet

Archetype — The Ruler Birthday — April 25, 1967 Zodiac Sign — Taurus MBTI — ISTJ Enneagram — 6; the Loyalist Temperament — Melancholy Hogwarts House — Huffleclaw (with a Slyth model) Moral Alignment — Lawful Good Primary Vice — Pride Primary Virtue — Diligence Element — Earth

Overview:

Mother — JODY Triton (nee Poole) Father — Cyrus Triton Mother’s Occupation — homemaker? Father’s Occupation — mer-government? Family Finances — uh all mermaids are rich are mermaids a communist dictatorshiP? Birth Order — Oldest Brothers —  None Sisters — JEAN, JUNE, JULY, JANE, JILL, JADE Other Close Family — Octopian, Trent -- brothers in law; Jewel, Jasmine, Jetta, Jem, Jennite, Jasperine, Julia -- nieces; Jordan -- nephew; Athena’s family. Best Friend — Sebastian and Scuttle Other Friends — Mufasa, The Prince ??, Benjamin Enemies — uh humans? lmao Pets — nah fam. Home Life During Childhood — More introverted but still friendly, didn’t get in much trouble (Athena was the #rebel). Kind of a nerd, his sisters’ deaths made him stoic. He loved them a lot and was kind of the peacemaker of them. Liked to explore, spent time collecting things/cleaning. Loved the environment.   Town or City Name(s) — Boscombe Reef off the coast of Bournemouth; Swynlake, England What Did His or Her Bedroom Look Like — it was under the ocean?? do they live in caves?? do they have infrastructure? do mermaids sleep in dens do they have "blankets" (makes no sense) and mirrors and toys??? BUT UH pretty clean and neat?? like if he did have toys and, sure, he had toys, they were always put away. Any Sports or Clubs — mer-debate, mer-student council, stuff like that Favorite Toy or Game — mer-chess, mer-monopoly (and the regular versions) Schooling — fish school? HAHA get it? puns. Favorite Subject — history but also really liked science and finds it v applicable to his job Popular or Loner — was very friendly and had friends, but they were mostly “school” friends. liked to be rather solitary, but lots of people liked him. Important Experiences or Events — his sisters’ deaths, moving to land, marrying/meeting athena, athena’s death, his daughters’ births Nationality — er English? I guess? Culture — Merculture Religion and beliefs — Merreligion  

Physical Appearance:

Face Claim —  Sean Bean Complexion — had acne and has scars, but otherwise dark, tan, leathery skin and kinda red sometimes Hair Colour — Copper-y brown/red but going grey Eye Colour — Blue Height — 5’10 Build — Stocky and powerful Tattoos — a whale across his chest, multiple smaller ones--probably all the girls’ birthdays somewhere listed under a fancy letter “A” Piercings — had a nip piercing, ear piercings -- still wears ear piercings when dressing up Common Hairstyle — on the longer side but nicely groomed--def going grey but still pretty brown/red, beard is super nicely groomed it is his best feature ofc (alana makes him special beard cream) Clothing Style — DAD™ wears cargo pants, sandals and socks, CROCS, hawaiian shirts, etc Mannerisms — strokes beard when thinking, talks with hands, frowns when deep in thought Usual Expression — resting bitch face, but he’s actually so soft

Health:

Overall (do they get sick easily)? — decent, probably gets colds every now and then but overall pretty robust health-wise Physical Ailments — n/a Neurological Conditions — depression, PTSD, anxiety Allergies —  seasonal allergies Grooming Habits — rather good, sometimes falls to the wayside bc depression, but mermaids pride themselves on their appearance, esp concerning their hair Sleeping Habits — insomnia which gets worse the more worried he is. Goes and sits in his office a lot at night. Doesn’t sleep very well at all. It makes him tired. Probably falls asleep watching TV in the evenings Eating Habits — eh, he can forget to eat if he’s busy and is a snack addict. But he always has dinner with the girls when he is home.   Exercise Habits —  not suppppppper active, but he swims which is really good for you, isn’t unhealthy but isnt like JACKED Emotional Stability — about a 7. He’s pretty stable unless the girls are giving him hell or something happens in Swynlake that throws off the sense of safety. Body Temperature — Normalish Sociability — 4-5, pretty average. He has been masquerading as a human for al ong time but sometimes he makes little mistakes and says weird things. Doesn’t really seek out conversation but can hold one very well. Not shy, just quiet. Addictions — uhh coffee probably Drug Use — nah Alcohol Use —  occasionally, likes a good craft beer; RARELY gets drunk

Your Character’s Character:

Bad Habits — indulges with food, dwelling on the past Good Habits — good grooming, good listener, organized, quick learner Best Characteristic — the biggest heart, he cares deeply about his fam and community Worst Characteristic — stubborn, suspicious, anxious Worst Memory — his sisters and athena’s death Best Memory — marrying athena! His daughters’ births! Proud of — his daughters, his company Embarrassed by — his daughters -- benjamin probably lol Driving Style —  too damn cautious, grandma, soccer moms you if the car stops too fast, Safe Driver ™ Strong Points — resilient, strong, detail-oriented, smart, studious, hard worker, meticulous, community-oriented/family-oriented Temperament — stoic, laidback til u piss him off Attitude — cautious, realistic, lil sassy but like subtle Weakness — his fears and anxieties Fears — losing his daughters Phobias — ?? Secrets — he’s a MERMAID Regrets — not being with athena/being able to save his sisters/wife, def relationships w lana and ariel Feels Vulnerable When — when he doesn’t know what is going on, lack of control, when his girls are upset with him Pet Peeves — littering, not being listened to, putting their feet on the dashboard Conflicts — wants his daughters to be independent v wants them to be safe; family versus community: mermaids are community oriented and it is hard for him to not fully be himseLF and not be useful -- would choose fam over community. Motivation — be a good community leader, keep his daughters safe, give back, keep the lake/ocean/community safe and clean, be a good dad Short Term Goals and Hopes — daughters succeed academically, board stuff, community safe Long Term Goals and Hopes — safe and happy for his fam, WANTS GRANDBABIES Sexuality — heteroflexible/demisexual Exercise Routine  — swims p regularly Day or Night Person — wants to be a day person, but his depression/insomnia force him to be a night person Introvert or Extrovert — extroverted introvert Optimist or Pessimist — pessimist with realist leanings

Likes and Styles:

Music — Jimmy Buffet and dad rock, also Jazz Books — biographies! Magazines — nat geo, home improvement magazines, men’s health, takes teen vogue quizzes w the girls Foods — p much likes everything, lots of fish, also likes sweets and junk food Drinks — craft beer, water, coffee Animals — his marine counterpart is a turtle!! But he likes most animals--just not in the house w a bunch of daughters,, Sports — eh not particularly Social Issues — left-leaning on most social issues, but more fiscally conservative. Big running points are always SAFETY SAFETY. Big on environmental stuff Favorite Saying — “if life gives you limes, make margaritas” - Jimmy Buffett Color — Green, like Athena’s eyes /tear Jewelry — wears bracelets, rings, necklaces, mostly hemp and beaded stuff, occasionally metal if Dressing Up Websites — watches TED talks, loves youtube (for animal vids), is that dad that comments on everything on facebooks, decent w the internet bc y’know he runs a company, TV Shows — home improvement, cooking shows, bad reality telly, historical dramas (mad men, house of cards), sitcoms Movies — tbh likes romcoms on the lowkey, hates horror, will watch anything hte girls want (but horror) Greatest Want — keep his family safe, happiness for his girls Greatest Need — learn to let go, safety/security/peace

Where and How Does Your Character Live Now:

Home — lives in the Woods, five bedroom, three floors, mansion Household furnishings — relatively modern but also homey Favorite Possession — his photo albums and his wedding ring Most Cherished Possession — HIS DAUGHTERS!!! Married Before — to the LOVE OF HIS LIFE Athena Significant Other Before — probably one girlfriend Children — Attina, Andrina, Adella, Arista, Aquata, Alana, Ariel Relationship with Family — has a good relationship with his sister who is still alive and that fam, they live on land these days tho closer to the shore tbh?? They probably work together. Really close with Attina, Andrina, Aquata. Has a good relationship with Arista too. Strained relationships with Ariel and Adella and Alana (in that order of most to least strained lol) Car — 2012 Honda Odyssey in grey -- “The Humpback” Career — CEO of Triton Industries, a nonprofit that works towards ocean clean up. Dream Career — Uh, probably exactly what he is doing tbh Dream Life — being able to move between the land and the ocean freely without fear of repercussion, athena alive, all his daughters happy, retired with grandbabies Love Life — non-existent /tear; tho tbh probably gets hit on all the time. This makes him uncomfortable. Talents or Skills — good at chess, good cook, handy around the house, knows sign language/french/spanish, can sew a bit, play an instrument ?? (something brassy maybe the trumpet or drums) Intelligence Level — 8, he’s v intelligent. Finances — they rich af holla @ sunken treasure

Your Character’s Life Before Your Story:

Past Careers — uhhh worked in mer-government tbh probabyl like environment conservation   Past Lovers — like one girlfriend, he was not very smooth w the ladies Biggest Mistakes — being too controlling, letting athena out of his sight Biggest Achievements — watching attina and adella graduate, all his daughters being safe and (mostly) happy!!, his company, his solid place on the board

[maryam0revna]

@pringlesaremydivision just fucking...did this whole list...for no reason. and I thought it was revolutionary, so here’s a bunch of shit you didn’t ask for!! 

1. if you got married, what colour would you wear to your wedding?

White but with some kind of gold thread/beading/other subtle accents. Bc I’m committed to getting married just after sunset with a bunch of candles and shit, so I’m gonna need my dress to have a golden glow to it.

2. do you prefer cereal & milk or hot chocolate?

Those are not opposites, but I guess cereal? You can have cereal anytime, but hot chocolate is pretty weather-dependent.

3. what name would you give to a cactus?

Spike

4. what would you name your kids if you had them?

Charles for a boy, Cora for a girl, or Caroline. I’ll probably change my mind by the time I actually have them. And no, I don’t know why they all start with C. Maybe I’ll be one of those parents...

5. what are your favourite shoes like?

They’re flat sandals; the part that cups your heel is black, and then there’s a wide band over the toes that’s a warm brown. They’re very Minimalist and match absolutely EVERYTHING, and I paid like..$8 for them at Dirt Cheap.

6. would you like to change your name?

Not really. It’s not my favorite, but it’s me. 

(Mood.)

7. are you a star person or a flower person?

Again, not opposites, and I am absolutely both. 

8. would you be ok with ending up single?

Oh yeah. I mean, I’d like to have many torrid affairs, but if I don’t find somebody I love and want to make it work with, I’m not gonna force myself to be in a subpar relationship. I’ll just have some sperm donor babies and live my best life.

9. are you a museum person or a park person?

Hmm, those are closer to being opposites, and yet I am still both.

10. how do you know it when you’re in love?

I’ve been in love exactly one time, and there was no one Moment or Lightning Strike or anything. I think the biggest thing was that I was willing to change my behavior to be more considerate of their needs. If you know me, you know I’m like...Very Me. Forcefully Me. So when I’m willing to modify or mitigate that, shit’s for real.

11. how was your favourite toy as a child like?

Do books count as toys? I was a book kid.

12. what name would you give to your car?

My current car is named Ahab. (It’s a big white whale, so obviously it needed a Moby Dick name.) Car before that was Belle. (Something about a Belle and Sebastian song. I don’t know. I was in 10th grade.)

13. do you decorate your bedroom a lot?

Yes. Candles, fairy lights, art, stacks of books, records, artfully draped scarves, giant cork board, etc. All have been in my room at one point or another, almost all at the same time.

14. does it make you sad to sleep alone?

GOD no. No one touching me? No one stealing the blankets? No one raising my body temperature to its boiling point? I love it.

15. do you have a favourite memory with your grandparents?

I have this very hazy memory that feels almost like a dream. We were in the car, late at night, driving to, I think, (great-)Grandpa Campbell’s house in Yazoo. My grandpa was driving, and my gran and I were in the back seat. The lights in the car were on, we had a blanket over our heads, and we were acting out a part of a movie. I can’t remember anything else except being very sleepy and watching the headlights from the oncoming traffic in the dark. The warm, hazy light under the sheet and then the headlights coming out of the dark...it’s comforting.

16. if you had a date, would you rather go to the amusement park or to the theatre?

Amusement park. Having been on a theatre-like date (we went to see Cirque du Soleil), I can authoritatively say that, even with someone I broadly enjoy, it’s a little uncomfortable, if you’re not like, A Couple already. And amusement parks are fun as hell! There’s lots to do, a lot of variety, and plenty of opportunity to be silly, which is ideal. 

Also ROLLERCOASTERS. I’ve had a blast riding a rollercoaster with an ex with whom I, at the time, had a pretty contentious quasi-friendship, because rollercoasters are the great unifiers. Once I’ve seen fear in your eyes (and you’ve seen my open-mouthed, eyes-clenched, screaming in absolute euphoria face) we’re a thing now, baby.

17. if you could have a professional makeup artist to do your makeup for a day, what would you like for her to do?

I would want her to do my makeup super slowly and teach me how to do it myself. Bc I’m pretty confident in my day-to-day abilities, but a makeup artist would definitely know shit that I do not.

18. does going to the doctor frighten you or comfort you?

Neither. I mean, if I know I need stitches, there’s some trepidation, obviously. But usually it’s just a thing.

19. if studying anything was free and you had endless time & energy, what stuff would you study?

Everything. I mean it. Everything. I would learn every language, every skill that could ever potentially be useful, everything.

20. who would appear in the acknowledgements if you wrote a book?

My parents, my extended family, my friends, and an old professor.

21. do you have a favourite bird? which one is it?

I do not. But hawks are very cool, and so are rosiate spoonbills. 

22. what colour do you wear the most?

Either navy, gray, or black. My hair is fairly bright, and I don’t want my clothes to compete too much. 

23. if you could launch a magazine, what would it be about?

Real Shit. Like, “here’s what you’re told about [insert subject of the month], but here’s the Real Shit that insiders know.” 

24. what name would you give to a cat?

My cat’s name is Hadrian. He was almost Sarkan, but he’s a Hadrian.

25. if you were a historian, what time in History would you like to study?

Either classic antiquity or Sun King-era France. I just wanna do The Most, please.

26. do you have a favourite lesbian story that happened to you?

Probably when MadTV outed my lesbian aunt to me. I was probably 7 or 8, and there was a joke about how two girls that were “roommates” must obviously be lesbians; my brain instantly went to my aunt and her very butch “roommate” of many years, and I was like, “Oh, okay. Noted.”  

27. what was your biggest childhood dream?

Literally to be a witch with magic powers. After that, to write books.

28. have you ever kept a dream journal?

Twice, briefly. My dreams are WEIRD and flow in ways that make them hard to describe.

29. if you had a camera & could start a photography project, what kind of stuff would you take pictures of?

My hometown. It’s such a place.

30. do you have a favourite kissing memory?

Almost all of my kissing memories are good kissing memories, so picking a favorite is tough... I think my favorite memory is my first kiss with the guy I dated my senior year of high school. The relationship ended badly, but that’s one of those Really Good Memories that just wasn’t tarnished by that. 

Basically we were on a picnic blanket in the middle of a field of tall grass, middle of the day, summer afternoon. Just had lunch, joking around. The day before, I had made some joke about “bite me” and he’d said some corny shit like, “I will”. So out of nowhere, he was like, “Remember how I said that?” and proceeded to plant a gentle but firm bite right onto my shoulder. Three things happened in about .25 seconds: I gasped, my eyes got approximately as big as dinner plates if I had to guess, and my mouth was on his mouth. It’s like I blinked and it happened, zero decision-making on my part. Pure response. Was it silly and completely High School? Oh yeah. But it was a funny, spontaneous moment that surprised the hell out of me, and I was the one doing the kissing! Good, good times.

[crowned-ladybug]

Monster

Didn’t have my WIPs with me bc I’m an idiot so I wrote this during my break between seminars today. Can hardly be called a fic, it’s more of me exploring a bit of my Anti’s character and maybe a bit of explanation as to why I love him and project onto him so much.

Characters: Anti, Seán (mentioned are Signe, Chase and Dark)

Word count: 1.2k

Warnings: nothing, as far as I can remember. Well, aside from no plot, of course

"Do you think I'm a monster?"

The question comes unexpected to say the least. Seán slowly puts down the drumstick he's been spinning in his hand and turns to look at Anti. The friendly demon is sitting on the ground with a box, his box of personal belongings, between his legs. He stares blankly at the box's contents – some clothes, a few lists full of places he still wants to visit, and a few knick-knacks of personal value. He's been gathering them for a while now, ever since Signe gave him the box and with it a segment at the bottom of the wardrobe to be Anti's to fill.

Anti slowly turns his head, raising his eyes to look at Seán with a lost expression.

"Do you think I'm a monster?" he asks again, and Seán averts his gaze for a moment, thinking.

Anti remains silent. He reaches into the box, takes out a bracelet of colourful plastic beads and fumbles with it absent-mindedly. Seán doesn't know for sure but he guesses it was made by one of Chase's kids. As he watches, Anti gently places the bracelet back into the box on top of a big black hoodie, one Seán recognises as Darkiplier merch. There's something almost painfully human in Anti's movements – fondness and melancholy. His black and green eyes remain clouded as he keeps digging around in his box with no real objective. Seán isn't sure if he's already forgotten his question or if he just doesn't want to rush.

Seán's immediate answer would have been a “no”. No, you're not a monster, you're my friend – but since when did those two things have to be exclusive?

He thinks through all he knows about Anti. He wants to analyse, think his answer over a couple times because he can tell this is important.

Anti has a heart, a big one at that. He might not look it at first glance, but Seán knows him well enough. He would kill or die for his friends without a second thought, because he's both impulsive and loyal, and his sense of right and wrong only depends on what is good for himself and the ones he loves. He'd take himself apart a thousand times over just to make a select few people happy and to get just a bit of love in return – Seán has, sadly, seen him do both in the past. It's not healthy, they both know, but Anti has little regard towards himself most of the time.

The fact that he will cease to exist if no one remembers him any longer leaves a permanent mark on his person. His biggest fear by far is to be alone, utterly and forever, and it's a fear no one really knows how to cure. They try with little things.

The box Anti holds so dear to his heart was Signe's idea so Anti could have somewhere to keep his things without fear of losing them to his ever changing dimension of a home, and they decorated it together. It was a promise made without words when they found a place for the box together that Anti is part of their life and will always have somewhere to come home to for as long as they are here.

Seán knows Chase introduced Anti to his kids as their uncle right off the bat and that it still makes Anti emotional from time to time. It was the very first time someone officially and proudly claimed him to be part of their family. The kids, Sammy and Grayson, absolutely adore their strange, pointy uncle. The last time Seán has visited Chase he took his time to properly look at the photos lining one of the walls in the living room. One of them was a polaroid, because those don't seem to have any problems with Anti's glitching. It was a picture of Anti and Grayson playing on a swing set, visibly neither of them realising the photo was being taken. Seán hopes Anti knows that picture exits and that it does so on Chase's wall amongst all the other family photos. He knows it would make Anti very happy.

And while Seán doesn't exactly know Dark well, he does know that he cares deeply for Anti. There's no way Dark doesn't know of his deepest fear either and Seán has a sneaking suspicion that Dark has some sort of memorabilia to remind him of Anti at all times and ensure that, no matter what, Anti will never fade.

In a way, Anti is very, very human for a demon. He can laugh as loud as Seán and make the same dumb jokes. He talks nonsense when he gets sleepy and his urge to cuddle with whoever he can get his hands on (preferably Dark) increases significantly. He gets downright offended if you pull out his earbuds when he's listening to music. He sits on the counter and tries to steal anything sweet when Seán and Signe are baking. He keeps lists of places he wants to visit with Dark, decorated with the colourful markers Signe got him to signal what those places are like and when they should visit them. He bundles up into big hoodies and scarves and blankets when the weather in the human world gets cold and he grumbles when the scarf starts getting scratchy against his throat. He does a lot of little things that make Seán forget that he isn't actually a regular human.

Which is a huge achievement, of course. Because Anti has big, pointy ears, and fangs to match, his eyes are black on the outside and green in the middle most of the time, and he glitches violently when he's upset. He can just up and disappear into electronic devices and fill Seán's notepad with glitched swearwords if he so pleases. He has a bleeding gash across his throat that opens up wider the more upset he is and his tattoos never appear in the same place twice.

Anti is very much capable of killing someone with a single swipe and Seán hopes no one just foolishly forgets that. Despite being a big softie sometimes, Anti is still a very dangerous being. He doesn't only almost always carry around a knife but he also knows perfectly well how to use it. He could permanently ruin a computer like it's child's play, and he could do scary things with all the data he could gain by hacking and stealing. The fact that he chooses not to doesn't change the fact that he could.

In many ways, Anti is downright terrifying. In many others he's unexpectedly lovable.

But is he a monster? Watching as he thumbs at the handle of the pocket knife Dark got him from Switzerland with clawed hands, unnaturally coloured eyes squinting as he smiles with his fangs showing, Seán thinks he knows the answer.

"Yes."

Anti's head shoots up and he stares, wide-eyed. He's not sure what to make of that answer.

Seán leisurely pushes himself out of his chair and walks over to his friend. He crouches in front of him so he can look into his eyes properly.

"Yes, Anti. I do think you're a monster," he squints his eyes not unlike how Anti usually does as he offers him a small smile. "But not all monsters are bad guys."

[the-cryptographer]

1, 3 (this part specifically: "copy paste a line from the first smutty fanfic you wrote"), and 7 if you'd like.

For the Fandom Humiliation Meme~

1. the worst fanfic I’ve ever written/have thought about writing

Ugh!

I think I already talked about writing most of an extremely angsty Fred & George fanfic about them switching identities and then ‘Fred’ dies. And you already know about me writing about the Kaoru siblings raising their child. What more is there to know?

Here’s some more extreme angst I’ve thought about writing, but am unlikely to. There’s this free-to-play rpg-maker horror-lite game called Ib. It’s about a girl - the eponymous Ib, going to an art exhibit, and getting trapped in the world of the paintings, along with a young man called Garry. Then there’s a girl called Mary within the world of the paintings that wants out. Anyhow, Garry becomes immediately protective of Ib and there’s a lot of cute moments that kind of maybe translate easily into a future ship. Except Garry’s also lavender linguistics coded as gay. Anyhow, I thought about writing a post-canon story where both are a little older, and Ib was crushing hardcore and a little terrifyingly on Garry. And he’s kind of, lol, no. You are a child and I don’t like women. But then they’re both kind of bound together by having gone through this horror game experience with one another, and Garry’s relationships with the men in his life are always falling apart because he’s had this really trippy mind-fucky experience he can’t explain to anyone. And eventually he kind of gives in and sleeps with Ib in a moment of weakness because she’s the only one who ‘gets’ what he’s been through. And Ib’s happy about it but he’s kind of miserable and both are in PTSD hell.

It strikes me as kind of problematic, which was maybe kind of the point. But it also sounds maybe a little bit too heavy even for me rn, so~

3. copy paste a line from the first smutty fanfic you wrote

oh god why?

the only smutty thing i’ve posted is this religious guilt, ethereal, one-of-these-people-is-dead, dubcon femslash that’s part of some angsty narrative for this really obscure video game. i actually love this fic but i think i might be the only one

“You’re not going to stop, are you?” Alouette asks.

Prier hikes Alouette’s dress up further.

Alouette sighs again.

“Very well,” Alouette agrees.

She arches her body up against Prier’s. She stretches one long arm around behind Prier, between her legs. Alouette’s finger nails are long, and scratch lightly against Prier’s skin and flesh, as Alouette peels her lips apart and palms the wetness of her sex.

the first smutty thing i actually wrote might be this Draco/Harry thing though. I actually wrote about writing it on this blog before.

So, one of the Drarry tropes I like is in those old fics where Draco somehow ends up in Grimmauld Place, right in the centre of the Order of the Phoenix. And I hate how it’s handled alot, but I love the idea. Because Draco is a racist piece of shit and there’s nothing more tragifunny than him getting stuck with a bunch of people who hate him, or at least hate every single thing he values, whereupon stress-induced craziness can happen [… in] this incredibly hostile environment of hostility, where Draco is super far from any position of power, and Harry and co are acting like self-righteous assholes, and Draco’s acting like his usual racist ‘giving-no-shits’ self but he’s not so secretly terrified… In this environment, Draco takes the opportunity to one-up Harry by dominating him… sexually…

And then that kind of reestablishes some sense of normality for Draco, because Harry’s kind of ashamed that he allowed it and wants more, and it gives Draco something to lord over Harry’s head - a foothold to pretend he’s not everyone else’s bitch in this situation (he is). Of course it all comes crashing down at some point, and also love rears its ugly head, and then Hermione defeats Voldie or something, and Draco walks away with a mansion and lots of Galleons and the classist system is depressingly reestablished.

full post

anyhow. I can’t pick out a line from it because that would involve me reading it and having to choose what to share while my face was on fire. so I’ll just copy-paste the whole thing and, if on the odd chance i decide to write the rest of this fic, i’ll remove the majority of it from this post.also it’s not completely written.also don’t judge me.also if you have any concrit it would be super welcome bc i know nothing about writing smut.

Draco wasn’t sure how he hadn’t realised it before,but Potter was a hair shorter than him, when they stood this close. It was onlya fraction of an inch, but Potter was looking down, averting his eyes, andcombined with his height, and measuring the distance Draco had to stare downwas an entrancing activity.

“If you’re not going to say anything worthwhile, youmay as well put that mouth to use otherwise,” Draco snarls. It’s muggle methodshe uses, kicking at Potter’s knees and pushing down on his shoulders, and anangry look flashes on Potter’s face and he makes a half-hearted attempt atresistance. Potter drops unevenly to one of his knees, his glasses knockedaskew, and grapples wildly with the front of Draco’s robes. It’s as if he weretrying to climb vertically up Draco’s front in the attempt to strangle him,pulling himself up by the lapels of Draco’s robes, twisting them in hisknuckles.

But then, by Potter’s own designs, if Draco has readthe situation correctly, he comes face to face with Draco’s cock, alreadyerect, with pre-come beading at the slit, and then dripping, rolling down theunderside of the shaft.

Potter freezes, and that moment feels like forever.It’s Potter staring through the crooked lenses of his glasses, his mouthclosed, refusing to make eye contact with Draco or turn his face away fromDraco’s crotch, and Draco suddenly has a moment of terrible insecurity.

What if Potter thought he looked funny? What ifPotter thought it was strange how pale it was, with blood colouring it red insplotchy patches? What if he thought it was too curved, or too long, or tooskinny? What if Weasley, or one of the other infernal Gryffindors were largeror more aesthetically pleasing?

And, if the thought of being inadequate compared toa Weasley isn’t the world’s biggest boner killer… Draco almost has to pullaway.

But then Potter, without a word, leans forward everso slightly, his cheek brushing ever so softly against the side of Draco’sprick. His glasses slip off his face the rest of the way and clatter on thefloor, and Draco hisses at the attention.

Potter shifts so both his knees are on the carpet,and then, tentatively, runs his tongue along the underside of his shaft,starting from the very edge of his testicles and moving up all the way to presshis tongue flat against the slit.

And well, that’s more permission than Draco hoped toreceive, so he shoves Potter back the rest of the way against the wall, andlines up his cock to shove back and forth roughly into the waiting mouth.

[…]

They don’t talk about it and Draco doesn’t expectthem to.

7. I already answered this one. But if you missed it my guilty pleasures are OT3s and doujinshi. …I think.