#and be free of her pain

[scientologisabethmoss]

i think about brooke eby, a 30-something woman on tiktok who makes videos about her ALS diagnosis, and how she’s just one of countless young people worldwide who is dealing with the most shit hand you can possibly get. i think about my aunt, who died in her early 50s from frontotemporal dementia and left behind my uncle and my two young cousins. how can you see others around you who, through cruel twists of fate or from awful systemic issues, don’t reach 50, 60, 70 years of age, and somehow deduce that the phrase “aging is a gift” is insensitive or not truthful?

i so desperately want my 95-year-old grandmother to die with dignity. i think that her life has been artificially extended longer than what it should have been in terms of being able to sustain a decent baseline quality of life. but my grandmother, who has always been afraid of death, has chosen to live the way she’s living - as is her right - and she will likely die in a difficult, traumatic way. i know her and i know my family, as much as i would like to be pleasantly surprised to the contrary. but in no way does the sad state of my grandmother’s life take away from the fact that she lived at least 75 full years, a gift given to very few people.

[irenespring]

Really I think nothing shouts "my first Presidential election as a politically active person was 2016" more than the fact that when I feel hope and excitement for the future (possible President Harris) for more than five minutes I immediately get a crushing, all-consuming anxiety of "feeling this positive emotion now is going to make it so much worse when the worst thing possible happens" to the extent that I'll probably need my break-glass-in-case-of-emergency anxiety medication.

[m4rs-ex3]

callum feeling small and insignificant just being in the throneroom

vs callum practically kicking down the doors and waltzing in guns blazing

[chirpsythismorning]

El being *12 hours earlier* than the Cali timeline when she arrives at Nina. Will saying ‘it’s been 9 hrs’ in the scene following his monologue in the van.

We know that at some point their timelines merged when they arrived to save her…

But we don’t know when exactly those alignments took place when they were still apart… which just makes you wonder…

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Halloween prompts year 2 day 17

A supervillian had captured a supernatural creature in some kind of device, the entity in question looked like a white haired teen from what they could see of him in the glass sphere he was enclosed in.

The villian was monologing about how they would use the creatures sacred powers to resurrect some evil gods or whatever when the heros intervened knocking him away and accidentally started the machine.

The teen screamed as electricity flowed through his body. Tim ran to him searching for a way to turn off the machine when his hand touched the outside of the sphere.

Unbeknownst to the heros, the machine required a piece of whoever was dead to revive them, it could be hair, blood, bone or even...a memory

That was how Tim, as Robin (or Red Robin whoever you prefer) found himself holding not his mom or dad or anyone you might have expected.

No.

He was holding someone he never thought he'd see again. Someone who didn't even think she was real. Someone who was marveling at her new body made of flesh and blood

Annie.

[heartorbit]

SPARKLE ON ✨✨✨

[5-turtleducks-in-a-trenchcoat]

Sasha (who's askin) Racket, my beloved.

I didn't even mean to finish this originally, but I have motivation for once so why not.

[fatedroses]

Reaper's Bounty.

[nikoisme]

Naptime

[firebrnd]

              Lovely-eyed. Death-touched. Witch.

I have never understood where the line is drawn, between sacrifice and self-slaughter. All the years I've been sacrificing for my friends sake, but at what cost? I love them, dearly. But what if I am sick of being the slaughtered lamb? The thought of being the protagonist of the story for once is uncomfortable, yet exciting. ( . . . )

# F̲I̲R̲E̲B̲R̲N̲D̲ ･ﾟ― headcanon based, private and selective portrayal of Bonnie McCullough ; influenced by book and show ( the vampire diaries ) but not following either of the storylines ( mun is heavily anti j.plec ! ) ; currently re-reading the books but consider this version of our beloved Bonnie as canon-divergent and heavily worked on by the mun. 21 + only, m&pdni ! ger/eng, but I'll stick to german for longer novels/threads for now. ― ･ﾟ

MAINS: @geisterwelt @ashbalfour @dopplgaenger @verflcht

NAVIGATION: 𝓅𝒾𝓃𝓉𝑒𝓇𝑒𝓈𝓉 l 𝒸𝒶𝓇���𝒹 l 𝓇𝓊𝓁𝑒𝓈

( fyi: the muse and blog are still a wip and a lot will be changed within the next days/weeks, as I am still re-reading the books (hooked on book three) ! but i am absolutely thrilled to interact and plot with you ! )

[queer-ragnelle]

Next person who writes Isolde as a waif child bride with no agency or claws I’m coming to your house and stealing all your lightbulbs.

[likethexan]

Helen wanting death for herself with a self hate stronger than any other character in the Iliad would never not be tragic to me

[lilithnights02]

I got flagged on my other acc @lilithnights01 so I’m going to post here more often

INTRODUCTION:

This is a kink blog!!!

I block ageless accounts. If there isn't an age somewhere on your profile DNI or I'm blocking you. "18+" does not count as an age. I do not consent to any interaction with minors on here, so if you're under 18 you should not be here. This space is not for you. I don't want you here, and I will block you.

Dms and asks are open. I do not share personal information or send pictures of myself.

I do love asks and tasks.

Stop sliding into my DMs thinking that just because I openly talk about sex and my desires, I’m going to help you jerk off. And if I do, it’s because I want to. I’m not obligated to answer if I don’t feel like it. At least say hi first. I’m a person, not your plastic doll for masturbation.

Kinks:

-dom/sub bdsm dynamics (I'm switch)

-CNC

-somno

-praise

-bondage/shibari/ropeplay

-tease and denial, orgasm denial/control/forced, edging, overstimulation / squirt

-breeding/creampie kink but no babies

-nipple pinching/clamps/suckers/vacuum suction cup pump

-spank paddling, slapping, choking, biting/marks ,hot wax candle, knife play, ice play, chastity, plugs, vibrators, blindfolds, dildo/inflatable dildos

-Sex machine, sex furniture/bdsm bench

-kidnapping, stalking (in theory) / masked man

-punishment, torture, pain, electrosex

-corruption

-slut training, brainwashing/hypnosis/mind control/ dumbification/ daddy's good girl/ brainwashing files/ gooning/ word trigger/erotic hypnosis

-voice kink/male audiogasm/ man whimpering,groaning,moaning/ man deep voice/ man guiding files

-anal, oral, dp, dvp

-Induced lactation/hucow training/lactation kink (no pregnancy) / sore, hard, sensitive nipples/bigger, heavier, swollen tiddies/ daddy's milk cow / pump machine

-cockwarming

Limits: pet play/treatment, full service sub/slave, cumming on food, race play, mutilation, being on a cage/cell, being sold,sexual trafficking,pregnancy kink,feederism, scat,vomit, piss, spit, incest, humiliation/degradation(boring), latex/leather/rubber catsuit, mouth gag, gas mask, feet, tickling

[thebestusernamepossible]

I’m mostly staying off the Mouthwashing fandom bc I personally don’t want to put myself through whatever discourse is ever going on there. But know I love Anya and Mouthwashing is one of the best games I’ve played that had an SA survivor AND was respectful about it!! The abuse Anya suffered is never portrayed as a spectical for the audience to leer at. They use the art of implication VERY well, and in the end Anya gets to go out dignified. She’s not just Jimmy’s tradgic victim, she’s her own character who makes her own decisions. Jimmy doesn’t get to kill her, she expresses her own agency to do so. She’s also the one who kept the gun away from him for so long. Also she’s SO fucking strong, she’s so cool. Anya I love you.

Also the game’s overarching (but subtle) commentary on rape culture, enabling, and how capitalism almost makes a set dressing for it is peak.

[pain-is-too-tired]

*Baps you. Baps you. Baps you. Baps y-*

Remember y'all. Caffeine is a stimulant. Stimulants typically have opposing affects on those with adhd. If a demigod drinks black coffee they ain't getting a burst of energy. At most they're going be able to focus their adhd more. Or just get tired and have heart palpitations.

Will is not staying up because of 100+ coffees. My man is awake out of determination and pure spite. The fact he hasn't snapped is a miracle.

Also. They're probably low on iron. Get those kids some supplements.

[soo-won]

Nobody is asking Yona to sacrifice herself or stay with the dragons forever. That's not why ppl are upset with her imo. What's disappointing was that when the gods say Kouka would turn into hell, we didn't saw any hesitation in her. She could've argued w them or showed some determination like: "hey, I won't let you play with me or my country no matter how hard you try" something she did while zeno was trying to kill himself. But no she's like oh hell sounds fun as long as I'm with my family. She even hesitated when Hak's life seems at stake. So what does it mean? And there's is a difference between her running away from the gods vs Suwon not depending on the gods. She's ok to enjoy the blessings but when it comes to pay back, she's running away. Yona acted like a selfish brat like she used to be in the castle, which is disappointing if we consider her development in the past

I'm not gonna lie in this case I feel like people are just looking for something to be mad at her. Like, in chapter 257, I was more bothered by Yona not hesitating because the consequences of that decision were 100% assured and known : all the dragons of the past waiting and suffering in vain until the current generation. And the whole time paradox twist was a lot to process and swallow in a few pages, that Yona's reaction felt sudden too. I wanted to see her hesitate then because I was affected as a reader by the twist that it was technically Yona that made the cycle happen? Even if from her POV it was about not erasing the past like damn that's a lot.

But the circumstances are not the same at all here imo. Yona has been in this chalice for like an entire volume. She tried already to negociate with the gods. It didn't work. They went against their words. They hurt the dragons. She tried everything she could here. They're basically bullying her, they keep tormenting her, she's not getting through them at all. Yona is affected and upset when they tell her about the dragons' limbs. She came here to begin with to save them, she made a deal with the gods that made her stuck inside the chalice against her will but supposedly in exchange of the dragons being freed, and now she realizes that even that failed and that they lost body parts. It's devastating. And Yona looks sick of it. From this point, it's clear to me she realized it's useless trying to get anything from them, because she won't. They're only toying with her and her feelings. All she can do is leave with them and defuse. There's NOTHING she can do more from the heavens, she can't ask the gods to save the dragons and even less protect Kouka.

Yona has been having nightmares about natural disasters and wars breaking out since chapter 257, she's already past hesitating about this too. So I don't mind she doesn't hesitate for it here. Yona in chapter 257 was scared of even falling asleep because she was scared of this future where she's all alone and it's hell everywhere. But she can only stop it by facing it and standing against it. It didn't happen yet, she has to keep her eyes open... She already learned this lesson. As we've seen with Yona protecting Hak from Zeno, her nightmares can be prevented, but this won't be if she stays still in heavens. Staying in a peaceful garden and shivering because intervening outside could cause more problems is much more like Yona of the beginning before her development, than Yona leaving to live in Kouka and fight against problems arising there. Yona was told her existence and actions were a pain that could create more problems at different occasions, and her conviction has always been to make her own place in the world anyways. Before she asks for the gods' divine protection, she should face her own fears and try to do something herself...that's how she always worked. She has always refused to rely on the gods alone.

The motif of living outside and in not the most comfortable place but finding purpose in getting through struggles together has been a thing forever that Yona's reaction about life outside being preferable only seems natural to me. I don't know... Her hesitating here would have felt redundant and would have surprised me. Yona has long ago developed the conviction that she finds more purpose in life in the struggles and difficulties because of all the people reaching out their hand to help, than her peaceful and confined, lonely days in the palace. She always found more purpose in helping people on the ground than to take decisions from above. Even in the castle and south kai arcs it was visible how she wanted to go help prisoners herself, and the way she went to rescue Meinyan shows it well too. I don't want her to hesitate for this. She already said she'd rather live in the mud in chapter 263 too. That's the most Yona thing ever imo, it makes me happy personally. It doesn't need to be said she's concerned for others, and she will keep running to their help to do something with her own hands. I don't need her to hesitate because personally I have no conflicted feeling about the situation and I think Yona is 100% right, here. I have no doubt she is intelligent enough at this point to say this too.

You could argue it would have been better if she had a speech like the one she had in chapter 43, and I can't argue about that (it's true it's very good!). I can understand, I just personally don't need it, because the fact chapter 43 exists is enough in itself to me and the present automatically resonates with it and everything before. I can't be mad at Yona not saying word for word "I'm going to save people struggling outside" because I already know that. I personally don't need that reassurance at this point.

The chapter shows her being concerned for Kouka and everyone on Earth when she flies on Ouryuu's back. Yona always planned to return from the chalice for everyone and everything she left behind on Earth. Of course she's concerned. She wants to bring her friends back from the chalice AND help everyone in Kouka. She promised Yun she would come back with everyone, she planned to return to Suwon too and not abandon her duties as Princess. All these things exist inside of her. Anyways, Yona doesn't need to tell the gods to stop toying with her country like she did with Zeno before too, because the ways things are presented, it seems like it's not like the gods cause this on purpose either? It's a consequence of everything going to shit, and it's also Ouryuu who is on her side talking to her before she says she prefers hell than here. So she doesn't reply angrily, she replies with hope. That's why that page is beautiful too, imo. The gods might not see and understand the value in such a world that Hiryuu and Yona are so fond of. But they can't help but love this messy, "hellish" world. Talking angrily to the gods didn't work in ch263/264 either, so I feel like it was also her trying a different approach when she told them she would live in Kouka maybe? Like she doesn't want to let herself be affected and be upset by them and she simply, intransigently voices her intentions to them?

You say you don't want her to sacrifice herself and stay with the gods forever, but also accuse her of "running away" from the gods and call her a selfish brat for her reactions in this chapter, so I really don't understand your point here. How on earth is Yona supposed to not depend on the gods in this situation but by not making a deal with them? Staying in Heavens, contract done to protect Kouka from doom and ending it at that (because she would be stuck there) would be truly the coward move imo. Yeah she's turning back and trying to get out of Heavens but... it's...good to stop moving forward and further if doing so brings you to extreme loneliness and/or death I think...? I think that's the point...Getting desperate, leaving everything behind and sacrificing more and more of your true wants and isolating yourself has been a pattern that never brought anything good to the characters that tried before. She struggles and things didn't happen as expected, many things are still unresolved, but she can only do so much in this situation. She tried. She tried discussing with the gods, asking them to free the dragons, to let her out. It didn't work, it was a blow on her when they forced her under a sea of flowers, when they tried torturing Zeno, and when she learned the dragons got injured. From that, she adapted and tried to leave. That's it.

I think Yona wavering when they threaten to kill Hak and what it means is pretty simple and is no secret. Yona loves and cares about Hak. Hak is someone important, personal and intimate to her, so obviously she's not unaffected. Yona from the very beginning has been trying to get stronger and do all she could to protect Hak again and again. Losing people dear to her is what scares her more than anything, it always has been so, even if it coexists with her caring about the world around her too. And you know, even if Hak is special to her, I honestly think that if the gods had threatened the lives of the dragons and not only their limbs, Yona would have been affected too. She would have also faltered had they threatened the life of people she doesn't know in the same terms. It's just extra cruel to use Hak in particular against her. It shows again the gods atp are only interested in destroying everything that might be connecting Yona to Earth. It's the exact same form of abuse that Chagol used against Meinyan. It's about isolating her. It's also not really the same as claiming people will die without the gods' divine protection that is more like a potential consequence than a term of a contract like it is at the end of the chapter. She can stand against conflicts outside and protect people there, but what can she do against Hak just, being killed by divine intervention if she doesn't return to heavens (supposedly)? They fucking coerce her here. Maybe it's just bluff, and she should not give a fuck about Hak and still leave. After all, what is one person against the world and her freedom! But well, she cares. She never discarded her loved ones and never compromised Hak and her friends' life. She never compromised the life of anyone really (which is different from sparing and refusing to kill anyone). That's who Yona is. Yona doesn't sacrifice and compromise people's lives, That's why she wants to save everyone AND wants to go home. And that's why she's stuck now. Yona wants to live. But she can't sacrifice someone innocent either, especially not someone she loves. It's the perfect dilemma for her. And that she's forced into it is what is heartbreaking. She shouldn't have to choose. That's why she needs help now.

Bringing up payback like this rubs me a bit in the wrong way...This damn idea of paying back is what has been haunting the narrative for so many years i can't conceive repeating it for Yona too. To me it comes from the same mindset that asks for retribution, punishment and karma for every character that upset Yona in some way or should be grateful and kneel to her and Hak that has been so sickening for so long. I don't want anyone to be forced to pay anything back ever. Every character should get all the help and support they need for free at all times imo. I don't think Yona nor the dragons should have to pay such a harsh price either. Because that's what a blessing is. That's what love and kindness are. That's what wishes are. If the gods really cared for Hiryuu, they wouldn't ask her anything in return, they wouldn't torment her, they wouldn't punish the dragons either. It can just...stop. (Because yes this favor shouldn't be at all to begin with) Which is what Yona wants.

Aren't we so tired of all this "contracts" and "punishment" and "paying back" bullshit by now? I so am. It's exactly what has been ruining the lives of the characters forever and now (and my mental health as a reader lol). She's paying back right now by being in this situation already. And that's not a good thing at all. It's very good narratively though because yeah, they want her to pay back! They make this about contract when she was asking a favor! She's paying the price for her decision in ch257, for ever using the dragons, for entering the chalice as Hiryuu's reincarnation...But it's nothing but sad. There doesn't need to be this payback. That's what the story is exploring. Looking for the dragons to survive (whom she never forced, even if yes they were bound by their contract thing) and protect Hak is not a crime, not erasing the past to save her friends isn't so evil that she deserves to sacrifice herself. Making it end is enough. It may be selfish that yeah she enjoyed the good parts of it until it bothered her but honestly I think it's okay lol. As long as it ends. As long as no one has to pay back anything for doing their best to survive and struggling to protect something. Like Meinyan doesn't need to apologize or to pay back anyone for all she did and was done for her, just like Suwon doesn't need to be even and be punished, like Shinah doesn't need to executed for attacking Suwon, like Zeno doesn't need to be punished for betraying Yona and the ddhhb, etc... Because it's better to look at the bigger picture and at people's circumstances you know...That's how I interpret this arc, at least.

Yona doesn't pay back by sacrificing things, she "pays back" by giving back out of gratitude. That's precisely what she does by doing all she can to save the dragons right now. The dragon warriors gave her so much without ever asking anything back, they saved her from danger and they saved her from despair, she's so grateful and loves them so deeply she wants to bring them happiness too. But Yona can't give the Gods what they want without sacrificing important things to her, and not when they're the way they are now. So she can only leave.

Of course Yona/Hiryuu alone getting this treatment from the gods was always unfair and it shouldn't be at all, especially not at the cost of so many dragons suffering for so long. But well, she did. And when learning how this "favor" was hurting the people around her, she was affected, grieved it in ch253/254, and then she opposed it and tried to stop it in the present. (Also she's been concerned by the dragons' use of their powers for a very long time even if she doesn't go deeper) But the gods don't care. You can blame her for not questioning things more before, I'm critical of this too, I still conflicted about chapter 257 as well, plus everything irt the crimson illness etc but like, she says it, she doesn't want their powers if that's the price. She only wants the human them. She doesn't need the dragons' powers and she doesn't need the gods' protection. When she throws away Hiryuu's sword they give her, it's her rejecting that again. She doesn't want that special power and favor, that's not what she's asking. She wants agency and power, but not at the price of the agency and free will of others. She wants everyone to have normal lives where they can decide things for themselves, to live with their whole free will. That's her development in this arc. I like that she finally faces these things.

Maybe it's just a question of preference, and you might be affected by Yona's reactions in a way I can't relate. But personally I like the chapter this way and I like Yona in it. I don't think she's a selfish brat (god. it's...such a thing to call her honestly it irks me sorry, despite all criticisms I have of her character.) I don't think she doesn't care about Kouka and its people at all. Ive seen people say that too but...Even if yes Yona is still a 16 years old girl with struggles and feelings and still some immaturity which is important to take into account, I don't think she's as childish and inconsiderate as people make her either. People often seem to say her reactions and decisions are emotional and with no reason but I think they're emotional AND with reason, at least here. Yona doesn't say this about Kouka struck by disasters being preferable than Heavens from emotions alone (because yes, she just wants to go home and she genuinely loves the people in Kouka), but also from experience and conviction. They don't cancel each other out. It doesn't make her a hypocrite to have personal interests in it too.