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sparkie96 · 4 years

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“Not Going Anywhere”

(A Happy Birhday Cleon Present to @midnightsapphiremoon (because Tumblr is acting wonky af on my end so sorry for the spam!) HAPPY BIRTHDAY!)

It was mornings like this that were either hit or miss for her, but right now? It was peaceful...bliss even. Claire just watched the storm, sipping her still hot and steaming coffee as she cradled it between her hands.

It had been months after the Sushestvovanie Island incident, months after Alex Wesker, the bitch sister of the infamous Albert Wesker, had come in with her little mole and tore TerraSave apart from the inside out. She had lost a lot of good people that day...people she had worked with and had been friends with for years. She nearly lost Moira and Barry too. The whole thing had just been one hauntingly familiar shitshow...one that she would very much like to forget.

So, here she was; sitting on the comfortable outdoor couch on the porch of the Burton Mountain House, protected by the overhang as she watched the rain soak the trees and drench the Earth while thunder rumbled all around. Lightning would occasionally light up the sky, brightening the darkened atmosphere. It was still early morning, and she didn’t make breakfast for herself yet. Mainly because her “roommate” for the weekend was still sleeping inside and she wouldn’t eat without him.

“Jesus…” A voice by the screen door said as Leon finally wandered outside, wearing nothing but a pair of black sweatpants and a white t-shirt, “It’s raining cats and dogs out here.”

A smile crept onto her lips as Claire turned from the serene scene to the beautiful man standing before her, “The weather channel said it was going to be nothing but thunderstorms all weekend.”

“True.” Leon said as Claire scooted over, allowing him to sit next to her on the couch, “So...how are you holding up?”

She gently nudged her shoulder against his before leaning against him, his arm wrapping around her shoulders, “I should be asking you that. You went through that hell with my brother in China and Tall Oaks.”

“We all went through some shit,” Leon admitted as his eyes met hers, his thumb gently rubbing her arm through the thick material of his sweatshirt, which he had just noticed she was wearing, “...You stole my hoodie.”

Claire chuckled, “It was left unattended at the foot of our bed.” She pulled her knees up so they were up against her chest, “And it looked too comfortable to leave unattended.”

Leon smiled and hummed as he settled his head against hers, both of them watching the rain, “Touché. Alright, you get a pass for now...but that’s only because you’re here to get over some shit.”

“Isn’t that why you came here too?” Claire asked, “To get over everything?”

Leon nodded as another bout of thunder rumbled above, “Yeah...and to get away from it all. It’s funny...how we all come here to get away from our problems.”

“Yeah,” Claire agreed, breathing in the thick earthy smell of soaked dirt, “that’s because the view is nice and the mountains are nothing but peace and quiet. And the cabin feels...homey.”

Once again, Leon nodded as the two of them grew quiet, listening to the whooshing sound of the rain as it pelted the roof above them. She had just noticed that the wind was picking up slightly, making the trees, bushes and windchimes sway. Claire could feel Leon’s warmth radiating through the material of their clothes, warming her body after the cool early morning Summer air chilled her skin. She could also hear the calming sound of his rhythmic breathing, and she couldn’t help but look up with a smile, wondering if he was about to fall back to sleep.

He caught her gaze, looking down into her eyes with another smile of his own, “What?”

“Nothing.” She said with a shake of her head, “Just wondering if the rain was making you sleepy again.”

“It is peaceful,” He admitted, “But...I could really go for some breakfast. How about some pancakes from that Waffle House we passed on the way up here?”

“Shouldn’t we be getting Waffles from the Waffle House?”

“We could do that too.”

“Okay...after a couple more minutes.” Claire said, “You’re too warm and I’m too comfortable to move.”

“Fine.” He sighed with mock annoyance, but she had known him long enough to know that he was teasing, probably too comfortable to move himself.

So, they sat there some more in their peaceful bliss, both too comfortable to budge. She did move to offer him a sip of her coffee, to which Leon accepted. He had made a bit of a face at the taste, but that’s because it wasn’t sweet enough for his liking. She poked her tongue out at him as he handed the cup back to her.

“I like my coffee a little bitter with a touch of sweet,” She explained, “unlike you, Mr. Sweet-Tooth.”

“You didn’t seem to mind the sweetness last night.” He teased, poking his tongue out back at her.

She shrugged, “Marshmallows and chocolate are a lot different than coffee, Mr. Kennedy.”

“Well, yeah,” Leon laughed, “No shit, Ms. Redfield, but a bit more cream and sugar in coffee wouldn’t kill you.”

“Well, a little less wouldn’t kill you either.” She teased right back.

“Hey, don’t knock Vanilla creamer.”

“I won’t if you stop busting on my bitter dark roast.”

“Deal.”

There was silence once more between them that morning, and Claire knew that they had been dancing around topics that both had been purposely avoiding. Words unspoken hung in the air, questions unasked. They hadn’t talked about all that they had been through these last few months last night over pizza, Claire purposely putting on a movie and Leon eagerly watching to avoid talking about their experiences.

Though, clearly she hadn’t avoided Leon coming in to sleep in the same bed as her, nor did he reject her when she rolled over and cuddled into his arms. They hadn’t directly said anything to one another, or even hinted, but Claire kind of had an idea of what Leon had gone through via Chris and Sherry, and most likely, Sherry told Leon about what had happened to Claire. But neither Leon or Claire directly spoke to one another about what had happened...and if she was being completely honest with herself, she would rather like to keep it that way.

At least until she was one-hundred percent sure that Leon was ready to talk about it and vice versa. She didn’t want to drive a wedge in between their already distant relationship and times like these were so rare that she didn’t want to drive him away and have to wait God only knew how long for another weekend like this.

She wanted to spend as much time with him as possible before they were tossed into the next hell fate threw their way. Because next time...what if one or neither of them made it out? And wouldn’t a thought like that make them want to talk and get shit off their chests?

Claire thought about it, but then mentally shook her head. No, it was better off this way, there was plenty of time to talk and she shouldn’t think like that. They were both very strong people who could handle their own in a situation like Raccoon City, Harvardville, etc. They were survivors and would continue to survive until their time came. They had plenty of time still and no BOW or terrorist was going to change that. They wouldn’t let them.

She had been so deep in thought, she hadn’t even noticed Leon gently shaking her arm, “Earth to Redfield? Are you alive in there?”

“Huh?” Claire said, finally rousing to focus on him, “What?”

“I asked how you’ve been.” Leon repeated, “But you seemed to space out on me there. Everything alright?”

She gave a small but reassuring smile and a nod, “Yeah...just...thinking about some things, y’know?”

He wore a concerned look, raising a brow, “Does it have anything to do with…?”

She gave a sigh of defeat. Well, there goes that plan. With another nod, the metaphorical dam burst as she admitted that she had been thinking about the island incident and everything that had happened. She admitted that she was going to talk about it at the same time Leon was ready to talk about what had happened to him, but avoided it due to not wanting to drive him away. Both topics were nightmarish to them both and she figured it was better not to talk than to...well, talk.

“I just…” She began but quieted herself once more, “I miss you, you know? And...it’s very rare that we get to hang-out or see each other due to working very different jobs and traveling and all that fun stuff. So, when we do hang-out or see each other…”

“You’re afraid talking about our problems is gonna make things awkward between us.” Leon deduced.

“Yeah, and...I don’t want that.” Claire admitted, “I just...want to pretend that things are normal and that we’re just a couple of old friends hanging out.”

“But we’re not.” Leon pointed out, catching her off-guard, “We’re old friends, yes...but...a disaster like that brought us together...a couple of times actually.”

At her questioning look, Leon continued on that they weren’t normal and things would never be normal for them because of the paths that they had taken. If it wasn’t for Claire, Leon probably wouldn’t have made it out of Raccoon City. Claire pointed out that it had been him who shot the first zombie that night and saved her ass, but Leon pointed out that she had helped him and Sherry out that night too.

“You’re the one who got the train working.” Leon pointed out, “If it hadn’t been for you, we wouldn’t have made it out.”

He then said that their lives had changed that night, and even though it had caused some future issues for them to face...it also brought them all together. Leon didn’t have much of a family before he met Claire and her brother and Sherry. It was because of them that he kept fighting, because they gave him something to live for. He had lost people along the way...but in the end, he still had them.

Claire felt a tightness in her chest, touched by his words as she swallowed the lump now in her throat, “I...I felt the same…” She admitted, “I just...I didn’t know you felt that way too…”

Leon smiled as he leaned in and kissed her forehead, “If there’s anything bothering you...you can tell me. And I know you’ll listen if there’s something up with me. So don’t you dare think I’m going anywhere, okay?”

Claire took a deep breath and smiled up at him, “I know...and I won’t.”

“Good.” Leon said with a nod, “Now...how about that Waffle House? I’m buying.”

#Cleon #Claire Redfield #Leon S. Kennedy #clairexleon #post Resident Evil Revelations 2 #Post Resident Evil 6

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barry-j-blupjeans · 4 years

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@taznovembercelebration - Day 5: Rockstar

Okay, so Taako didn’t really like working at the pet shelter. Don’t get him wrong, it was a lot better than like... working as a cashier or a waiter or something where he had to be interacting with people for ninety percent of his day. But he wasn’t a fan of ninety percent of his day interacting with dogs, either. They were yappy and snappy and frankly, too much for Taako. He was much more of a cat person, but they only had so many cats and they got adopted fast enough.

But the job had its perks. Working with Lup was one, obviously. Having a decent pay, hell yeah. Having people respect what he did, sure that was great. Maybe having Magnus as his boss wasn’t the best (gods know that Magnus didn’t need another thing to hang over his head), but overall, the work was fine. Taako could manage.

He was closing today. There was only about an hour left before closing. Lup and Barry were in the back, checking up on all the animals when the bell above the door jingled and a group of two stepped in. The adult was tall, with his hair done up in locs. He wore all black and an baggy, but fashionable, overcoat. Nearly attractive enough to make Taako stop and stare. With him was a small kid, bouncing excitedly. His glasses were almost slipping off his nose, his hair was wild and unruly and he was so eager that the man had to hold him back

Taako didn’t know who brought their kid into pick a pet out at 6:30 PM, but what the hell, work was work.

“Hey folks,” Taako said in his best costumer service voice, standing behind the front desk. “Welcome to Raven’s Roost pet shelter, what can I do for you today?”

“Kitty!” the boy said. He couldn’t be more than four years old. He broke free from the man’s hold and came up to the counter. His didn’t even peak over the top. “Do you have any, sir?”

Well, at least he was polite.

“Sure do,” Taako said. “What kind of cat are ya looking for, kiddo? And guardian, of course.”

“I’m his dad,” the man. “Um, we can come back tomorrow if it’s too late-”

“Kitty,” the kid whined, tugging on his dad’s sleeve.

“We probably won’t be able to take one home today, Angus,” he said. “We’ll come back tomorrow and-”

“It’s fine,” Taako cut in. “Don’t worry about it, there’s still a bit til we close. I can even send you guys home with the paper work if you find a cat you like.”

“Kitty!” Angus said triumphantly.

“Yes, Angus,” the dad said wearily. He was smiling though.

“Right this way, then,” Taako said.

The pet shelter wasn’t too big, but it was noisy. The past the door that lead to the dogs and Taako could hear Barry talking- probably trying to calm them down.

“What’s your name again?” Taako asked as they neared the cat door.

“Oh, uh,” the man said, looking a bit nervous. “It’s, um. It’s Kravitz McAllister. And of course, my son, Angus.”

“I’m Taako,” Taako said, like they hadn’t already read his nametag. “Have any type of cat in mind?”

“Good with children?” Kravitz said. “Angus knows not to- he knows they’re not play things, obviously, but he gets excited around cats, he really loves them. Probably not any cat that loves outdoors and uh, age doesn’t matter. Kitten, been here for ages. Doesn’t matter.”

“Got it,” Taako said, holding open the door for them. “All the cats we got are in here.”

Taako spied Lup look over from where she was giving some food to one of the older cats. And then he saw Lup drop the food all over the ground and swear to herself.

“Sorry!” Lup called over and Taako rolled his eyes.

“Lemme go help her,” Taako said to Kravitz. “Feel free to look at any of the cats.”

Angus was already staring down a middle aged tabby. Kravitz smiled and went to join him as Taako went to help Lup.

“Doofus,” Taako whispered as soon as he got close enough, kneeling down to help help.

“Shut up,” Lup hissed intensely. She peaked over Taako’s shoulder at the customers and then ducked back down. “Taako, do you have any idea who that is?”

“Uhhhhh, a handsome fella here to get his kid a cat?”

“It’s Kravitz McAllister,” Lup said, like that meant something to him. “Like? Literally the most famous singer in the country at this very moment Kravitz McAllister, Taako, what the fuck.”

“Why haven’t I heard of him, then?” Taako said back, shoving the cat food in a pile. “If Taako don’t know him, he’s not famous.”

“Well now you fuckin’ know him, dumbass,” Lup said. “Fuck, should I tell Barry? Holy shit. Get a better music taste, Ko, how do you not know him?”

“I’m sorry your music is shit,” Taako said. “Help me clean this up.”

Lup was already up, scurrying out of the room to get Barry. Taako would have flipped her off but there’s a child and a celebrity in the room. He finished cleaning up the cat food and returned to feeding the cat that Lup had left behind. Taco.

Man, Taako loved Taco. Taco was the best cat here. A shitty, grumpy, silly old man.

“Who’s that?” Angus said, suddenly right next to Taako. Taako jumped, nearly dropping the food again.

“Oh, uh, this is Taco. T-A-C-O, verses my superior T-A-A-K-O.”

“It’s nice to meet you Taco!” Angus said and it took a moment to realize that he was talking to the cat. “I’m Angus. Do you like reading?”

Taco looked at Angus with the driest expression Taako had ever seen in a cat and meowed brokenly. His voice sounded like a broken harmonica.

“Daddy, did you hear that?” Angus said and Kravitz came to look at the cat, too. Taco glared at Kravitz and Kravitz had the sense to look intimated. Taco meowed again, but swayed his way towards Angus, who petted him gently.

“He’s so soft!” Angus said. “Can we get him?”

“We’ll come back to see him tomorrow and decide,” Kravitz said. “It’s very late for you.”

“Aw,” Angus said. “But he’s such a good kitty!”

Good kitty was not anything that Taco had been called before. But he preened under the praise and meowed a B flat at Angus.

“He sure is,” Kravitz said nervously and Taco gave him a sneaky stink eye as Angus petted his back. “We’ll be back as early as we can tomorrow morning.”

“Okay,” Angus said, retracting his hand sadly. “Bye Taco! And- and Mr. Taako!”

“See ya tomorrow morning, kiddo,” Taako said, leading them back out. “You want the paperwork to work on now, Krav.”

Kravitz looked startled at being addressed like that and Taako took even more stratification than normal, because he was a celebrity. Ha. Point one for Taako. Taako opened the door back up and paused upon seeing Lup and Barry giddily whispering down the hall. He shut the door and said,

“Actually, my... cohorts seem to be fans of yours and we could go out the back to piss them off,” Taako said offhandedly. Angus didn’t seem to mind, simply turning on his heel and waving to cat Taco again. Kravitz’s eyes widened comically and hurried to follow Taako with a quick pace.

“You know?” Kravitz said, astonished. “I didn’t think you knew.”

“Oh, I totally knew,” Taako said, lying his ass off. “I just don’t give a fu- I don’t care,” he corrected as he remembered Angus. “I mean, you can’t be as famous as me.”

“As you?” Kravitz said, amused. They reached the backdoor.

“Uh, yeah,” Taako said. “I’m Taako? You know, from TV?”

#taz #taakitz #taako #kravitz #might continue !!#mine #taz november celebration #no editing we die like men #ise cube writing

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darlingpetao3 · 4 years

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Miss Independent (Nash Wells x Reader)

Rating: T

Summary: You’re a tough and independent and oftentimes stubborn member of Team Flash, almost to the point of self-sabotage. But when Nash Wells pops onto the scene and beats you in a fight, you refuse to accept any form of help from him in the latest Team Flash mission.

Tag List: @fandomdancer @bluesclues-1234 @blogforhoes

You’ve always been a do-it-herself kind of girl.

In school, when you carried your books to class, sometimes boys would ask to carry them for you.

“No thanks, I’m good.”

And there’s always that one item at the store that’s on the top shelf, just out of reach. A fellow customer or a stock-boy will check to see if you need assistance in reaching the pesky missing piece of your grocery list.

“Oh, that’s fine, I got it,” you’d say, and proceed to scale the shelves and channel the essence of your stretchy teammate and friend to reach it.

You may even reach a new level of stubbornness when you decline to accept help to carry said groceries up and into your downtown Central City apartment.

“I’m nearly there, thanks though!”

And you by no means need a man to save you.

Since the infamous Particle Accelerator explosion of 2015, and subsequently gaining your new-found abilities, you can do it all yourself. You can take care of yourself. Team Flash has lovingly dubbed you Miss “Indy” Independent.

Of course, one night of working your second-job as a vigilante for smaller crimes (muggings, corner store thefts, that kind of thing), you come face to face with a man who will turn your life upside down.

As if it hadn’t been turned upside down already.

***

You’re patrolling a different section of the city than usual tonight, near the Ivo Labs building, when you spot a figure in the alleyway at the side door to the premises. You press your fingers to your domino mask to make sure your identity is secure for this upcoming bust.

“Hey, you!” you shout. “Get away from there!”

Fully expecting the tall shadowy figure to flee, you are surprised to find the opposite. In fact, they step out into the dim light of the street lamps. It’s a man. It’s…

Oh hell, it’s another one.

You catch him stash something into one of his pockets. So this Wells is a thief. Huh… that’s different.

You’re still not going to take it easy on him.

“Whatever that is,” you call out, making careful advancements toward him, “you better hand it over.”

“Let me guess, ‘or else?’” This new, apparently cocky Wells replies. You laugh.

“You better believe it.”

“I’m afraid I can’t do that.”

“Then you’re in for a world of hurt.”

You break into a run, effectively charging Wells the Thief. Only, what you didn’t expect was for the man to shoot a grappling hook at a fire escape up above. He uses the propelling motions to fly over your body and land on the other side of you.

“Neat trick,” you say with a growing annoyance. But why don’t you fight me for what you took like a real man?” To emphasize the figurative throwing down of your gauntlet, you get into fighting stance and put up your dukes.

Wells walks back towards you, not even attempting to leave the situation. You can already tell this one loves a good fight. Hell, maybe they all do. This ought to be good.

You throw the first punch - pulling back tightly like a master archer - and letting it fly. What should have been his face, your knuckles meet his palm as he catches it.

How-?

“Gotta do better than that,” he says. You continue to throw a flurry of punches, all of which this Wells manages to block. And then, on your last one, disarms you and renders both your hands incapable of moving.

“You have beautiful eyes,” Wells remarks. “Are you married to that mask, or…?”

“Shut up.”

By hooking a leg around his you get him to stumble down to his knees, but he lunges at your middle and knocks you both down to the ground. Luckily, your head didn’t hit the pavement, but the crash is still not at all pleasant on the ol’ tush.

You take your chance and attempt to rifle a hand into the pocket you saw Wells stash the mysterious stolen object. Only…

“Call me old fashioned,” Wells says with a sideways smile, “but I’d rather you buy me dinner first, my dear.”

After being momentarily confused, you realize what you are rooting around for in his pocket is not, in fact, the thing he stole.

“Give it to me, now!” you demand before you’re forced to use resort to using your special abilities on this crook. This Wells’ eyes twinkle with mischief.

“Sorry Beautiful, I’m not that kind of guy.” The pair of you scramble to get up and just as you lift your hands to power up your energy blasts, Wells flashes the item he stole at you. He shoots you a wink. “Rain check?”

Suddenly, there’s a loud noise, followed by a dense fog of smoke. You run into the haze, hoping that didn’t just happen - that a thief didn’t get away from you. You’ve fought big bad metas! How could you lose against a cocky, ability-less, cat-burglar with second rate magician’s tricks?

Still stunned at your failure, you head home for the night while replaying everything about the fight in your head until it nearly drives you mad. You can’t believe you lost. You never lose! Consider yourself clocking out of this night shift. You hope you see that bastard again because when you do, you’ll be ready.

And he’ll regret the day he messed with you.

***

“(Y/N), meet Nash.”

You can’t believe it.

You cannot believe Barry is introducing you to him.

“You.” Your voice seethes with disdain. Of course this Nash, the Wells from that night that shall not be referenced, lights up like the sun at seeing you. He points in your direction.

“I’d know those eyes anywhere,” he says smoothly. “How’ve you been?”

“You two already know each other?” Cisco asks, scanning you both on opposite sides of the main monitor desk. You give a flat “no” the very second Nash says “we sure do.”

“‘Know’ is such a strong word,” you explain vaguely. “You know he’s a thief, right?”

“Yeah, he kind of helped us with our own heist…” Cisco says.

Great, so now we’re thieves?

“Anyway,” Barry continues hastily, “we’ve come up with a plan to catch Pinstripe at last. But there is a catch…”

“Let me guess. I serve as a distraction?” It would only seem fitting. You happened to have had a brief relationship with Pinstripe, one of Central City’s biggest gangsters. To be fair, though, this was before he ‘made it big,’ so to speak. You had no idea so long ago that your boyfriend at the time would become a heinous villain.

“Actually…” Barry scratches the back of his neck. Oh, great. “You’d be the bait.”

Welp, this might as well happen.

“Okay,” the word comes out as a sigh. “He’s been trying to track me down for years anyway. Just let me know the when and where and I’ll get it done. I’ll bring him down.”

“We’re going to send Nash in with you,” Barry tells you, “to keep you safe. Meanwhile, Frost and I will-”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” you interrupt your friend. “I don’t need anyone, let alone him to keep me safe.”

“I can help,” Nash steps in, “I have experience in-”

“-No, thanks. I got this all on my own. I don’t need your help.”

The Wells doppelganger holds his hands up in surrender. Barry and Cisco’s cringing expressions don’t go unnoticed as they exit, leaving you with Nash. As if to dissolve the extremely palpable tension, Nash leans against the wall.

“So, how about that dinner?”

***

You should have figured your ex-boyfriend would have shot you.

Really, the blast from his top of the line energy rifle nicked your shoulder, but it still hurt like hell. Part of the sleeve of your jacket has a singed hole. You could probably see the smoke coming off of it if you weren’t booking it up the stairwell of this office building. Pinstripe must have seen you dart inside…

“You won’t get away from me this time, (Y/N)!” the gangster calls up to you.

You press a finger to the comms in your ear. “You guys, I’m leading him to the rooftop.” There’s no reply. “Guys?” Well, shit.

Pushing through the exit door on the uppermost level, you keep running until you reach the ledge. You need to think fast. Maybe you have enough energy stored up for a good blast at Pinstripe? You have to try.

Pinstripe, with his suit that matches his Cisco-given villain name and slicked-back hair, he finally swaggers through the door. He’s no longer in a rush to capture you. There’s nowhere to run for you and still no sign of Barry or Frost.

“So, it’s come to this?” Pinstripe asks with a gross smirk. “Running away from our love again?”

“You’re a bastard. And I don’t love you.”

“Tell you what? You get away from that ledge, come home with me, and I won’t shoot you?”

“As if.”

You thrust your hands forward to let loose one of your energy blasts from your hands, but nothing happens. You have no stored energy left…

Pinstripe raises his rifle and aims. “I gave you a chance.”

Just then, your comms short-circuits in your ear, taking you by surprise and causing you to stumble back and hurtle over the edge. But an exhilarated shout grows louder, and before you know what’s happening, something catches you mid-fall. And now you’re… swinging through the air?

“Aw, (Y/N), are you falling for me?”

Looking up, you find yourself in the firm grasp of Nash Wells. The man smiles at you, but you are still in shock. You’re finding it hard to breathe.

When the pair of you finally touch ground again, Nash makes sure to set you down gently.

“Are you alright?” he asks you.

You do a quick self-check. “Yeah, yeah I think so.”

“Indy, are you safe?” Barry’s voice chimes in your ear. The comms are back online, it would seem. “We’ve captured Pinstripe. I’m taking him to Iron Heights.”

“I’m safe,” you confirm. “...Thanks to Nash.” The Wells beside you smiles at the recognition. “Seriously, thank you. I’d be pancake if you hadn’t…”

“Don’t worry about it.”

A wave of guilt and realization washes over you. “Listen, I’m sorry for biting your head off before. I was just bitter at having lost to you that night. See, I never lose. Apparently I’m on a downward streak.”

Nash simply nods, letting you get everything out.

“I was blind before, but now I know it’s okay to have help from others. Especially when you’re about to die!” You laugh awkwardly. “I don’t know why it took me so long to see it. I’m on a team, and I haven’t been acting like it.” Now you’re talking more to yourself. You proffer a hand to your saviour. “Welcome to Team Flash, Nash.”

“Thank you.”

You know, now that I think about it, this guy’s not half-bad looking...

“So,” you start, “how about that dinner?”

Requested by @emilyfandoms: So the readers personality is more of a do it herself type of girl. She doesn't need a man outlook on life because she can do it herself. She is a strong meta and knows how to handle herself even without her powers. So on first meeting Nash maybe they get into an actual fight and she ends up loosing which she gets super salty about it and can't stand Nash after that with his cocky personality and all. So once he finally( flirty with her) joined the team they have to use her as bait to catch a villain who is specifically after her. She ends up getting hurt and Nash saved her literally sweeping her off her feet afterward. So she falls for him then because she never had a man actually save her and yeah she wanting some Nash booty after if ya get what I mean. 🍑 👀 😏

#reader insert #requested #emilyfandoms #harrison wells x reader #harrison wells imagine #harrison wells fanfiction #nash wells x reader #nash wells imagine #harrison nash wells x reader #the flash imagine #the flash fanfiction

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wizard-loving-wizard · 4 years

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TAZ November Celebration - Day 5 “Rockstar”

@taznovembercelebration

I have a few TAZ fics in progress, so I reeeally wanted to write something for the TAZ November Celebration! Enjoy some Taakitz, some Blupjeans, and some rock ‘n’ roll shenangians. (Rating: M)

Taako was bummed. He hadn't heard from the mysterious Kravitz all day. It wasn't unheard of for Taako to allow one of his fans to enjoy his fleeting company for one night only while he was on tour, but he really liked this Kravitz. He definitely thought he'd get a call back—that's why he’d left his number on the motel nightstand.

It was a shame. Kravitz was cute, in the excessively sexy goth-punk kinda way. He was also a dorky kind of funny, and annoyingly smart. He wrote for a local music magazine (!!!) and seemed to actually love Taako’s band. (“I didn’t come here for work, by the way. Not yet. I just love your music,” He’d said so casually, as if that wasn’t the sexiest thing a goth music writer could ever say.)

Taako had preened across the tall, sticky table, and when he pointed to the motel down the street, Kravitz was surprised but enthusiastic. They spent the night together, and it was very fun.

As his band set up for their next show at the same bar, Taako was losing hope. He hadn’t heard anything from Kravitz all day. This was their last night in Neverwinter, so it was mere hours before he would have to leave Kravitz behind for good. Plus, Taako kept catching the drummer being all romantic with his long-term girlfriend who was on tour with them, and normally that didn’t bother him, but today it made him lonely.

So Taako was already in a shitty mood when Merle marched onto the stage right before soundcheck, clacking his cellphone closed and announcing, “Bad news.”

Taako threw a nervous look over to his sister, who was messing with around with her bass on the other side of the stage. She looked up, equally confused.

“Johann isn’t coming,” Merle said.

Taako’s jaw dropped open.

“What?” Magnus asked, standing up behind his drum kit at the back of the stage.

“Dammit,” Lup muttered.

Taako glanced around at his band mates and his dejected manager. “Are you sure there’s no way he can stay?”

Merle shook his head, saying, “His mom is sick. He’s already in a taxi heading to the airport.”

“Damn.”

Magnus pouted, dropping his drumsticks against the snare sadly. “So, what? We can’t play?”

“No, not without a keyboardist.” Lup delivered the diagnosis with a grim look.

Before Taako could come up with any other ideas, they were resolved to take a break and pack everything back up in an hour. Once the rest of his band had cleared out the stage, Taako dejectedly settled his guitar into its stand. The bar was calling to him, so he hopped off the front of the stage to go get a drink.

In a surprisingly wonderful turn of events, he only made it halfway there before he stopped in his tracks, watching a familiar tall-dark-and-handsome step inside the front door. Could it be?

Taako weaved around to the front, until he made it into the purview of Kravitz’s scanning gaze. Kravitz brightened and said, “Taako!”

“Kravitz!” Taako greeted back, waving, and then remembered that this was the bitch who didn’t call him back.

Kravitz rushed up to him flustered and said, “I’m so sorry I didn’t call.”

Taako blinked in surprise.

He looked embarrassed. “My cat shredded your note before I could put your number in my phone.”

Taking the blushing as a sign of honesty, Taako threw back his head laughing. “No way!” His stomach warmed as he stared into Kravitz’s sweet eyes and realized why he was here.

“Yes, she’s still just a kitten.”

“Awww.” Taako remembered seeing pictures of the little black kitten last night, he thought, somewhere between his second margarita and third tequila shot. He leaned in a bit closer and resisted the urge to pull on all the things hanging off Kravitz’s stupid chic black clothes. He said, “Well, thanks for coming by. But there’s no show tonight, our keyboardist bailed.”

Kravitz looked around and then pouted. “Oh no! You guys can’t play?”

“Not unless someone in this bar can read sheet music,” Taako said.

But Kravitz had an electric look in his eyes. “Actually, I might know someone who can help.”

Lup had drank three beers alone in the closet being passed off as a green room, and she wanted the fourth to be different. She stumbled around backstage with two glass bottles in her hands, humming the Fantasy Costco theme under her breath and searching for her brother.

She found someone else before she found Taako: a human man coming in through the back door, looking like the last person that would ever patron this dive bar. Lup waltzed down the hallway towards him, screaming, “Hey!”

He jumped, staring back at Lup with exactly the amount of fear she wanted everyone to have when they first met her.

She smirked and walked closer. “You lost, thug?”

“Um,” The guy said, giving a cautious eye to the bottles in her hands. “No, actually, my friend told me—are you in the band?”

Lup snorted. “In it? Please, I practically am the band. I’m Lup,” She said, and juggled the beers into one hand so she could extend the other.

He shook it hesitantly. “Barry. I heard you needed a keyboardist?”

“Yes!” Lup jumped in excitement, almost losing both bottles, but managing to cradle them close. “You play piano? Can you read sheet music?” Barry was cute, and he was looking cuter every second.

“Yes, but—”

“Sick! Come with me,” Lup instructed, and grabbed Barry’s arm to pull him towards the green room.

“Have you—”

“Go in here.” Lup pushed him into the closet, following close behind him. She set the beers down and starting rifling through a bag for the folder she needed. When she found it, she slammed it onto the table in front of Barry. “Here’s your music.”

“I…” Barry trailed off, glancing through the folder experimentally. Then he looked at Lup. “Do you know where Kravitz is?”

“I have no idea who that is, buddy,” Lup announced happily. But Barry looked sad, so she revised, “How about you stay here and learn your chords, and I’ll go find him.”

Barry sat in the creaky folding chair and muttered, “Fine.”

Lup started to head out, ready to totally forget who she was looking for, but Barry stopped her.

“Wait, what’s the name of your band?”

Lup furrowed her brow. “It’s in there,” She said, pointing to the music he was looking at. “The Astral Complainers.”

“Huh,” Barry said quietly, and then smiled at Lup. “That’s pretty good.”

Lup smirked. “Thanks.” She almost darted out of the room, but hung off the doorframe to tell him, “If I find everyone, soundcheck starts in 10.”

As she skipped down the hall towards the stage, she heard Barry call after her: “If?”

“Fuck…shit,” Taako swore as Kravitz kissed his neck. The tour van was a pretty terrible spot to make out, but as annoying as the limited space was, there was something about being stuck in Kravitz’s lap that Taako definitely liked. As Kravitz ran his hands under Taako’s t-shirt, Taako squeezed his arms tighter around Kravitz’s neck.

Kravitz looked up and licked his lips. Taako couldn’t even take in a breath before he had to kiss him.

And that was when the door swung open.

“Ahh!” Taako shrieked at the sound. He jumped and turned and leaned all at once, sending himself tumbling to the floor, seeing his sister’s angry face on the way down. Shit shit shit shit shit, Taako swore inside his head, enjoying his new view of the dirty van carpet.

He heard Kravitz say, “Taako! Are you okay?”

Taako struggled to untangle his legs from the seat. “Ow. Yes! I’m fine!” He lied.

“You must be Kravitz,” Lup’s voice said, and Taako had no idea how she knew that, but it couldn’t be good that she did. He twisted and turned on the ground, trying to free himself.

“Yes, I’m—yes. Did Taako tell you…?”

“No. Barry’s here.”

“Great!” Taako announced, thought it was mostly muffled by the floor. He finally pulled himself up onto the seat next to Kravitz. “I saved the show!”

But Lup was not impressed. “Nu-uh. No boys in the van, no exceptions. You know that.”

“I mean, Kravitz saved the show!” Taako reached over to grab Kravitz’s arm, smiling sweetly. “I had to thank him.”

The way Kravitz smiled back, Taako couldn’t stop himself from leaning across the aisle, caressing his arm softly, and—

“Hey! Cut it out!” Lup said, and he felt a smack on his shoulder.

Taako’s face warmed as he looked back at his sister. “Sorry.”

“Whatever. Let’s go, we have soundcheck, now.”

Taako was already reaching for Kravitz’s hand when he said, “I should come and thank Barry.”

Taako smiled. “Perfect.”

Soundcheck went well. Really well. Afterwards, as Taako ran off to canoodle with the Hot Topic model some more, Lup was thinking that Barry’s skills far surpassed just reading sheet music. She went to corner him at the back of the stage, and got Magnus’s blessing of a wink and a swift exit.

Lup hadn’t realized she was so obvious. She knew she shouldn’t have kept turning around so much while they were playing. Taako probably had no idea anyways; with the handsome silken vampire hanging around, he had the biggest hearts in his eyes she’d ever seen.

“Hey. Barry. Good job.”

He smiled. “Thanks. I hope it sounds okay, let me know if—”

“It sounds great,” Lup promised, leaning gently on the keyboard and giving him a little smile. Water, she remembered, for her tipsy-ness and her voice. She took a drink from her water bottle and then said, “You’re good, do you work in music?”

Barry laughed nervously. “Yes, but, not this kind of music.”

“Aw,” Lup teased, batting her eyelashes at him. “Do you work in pop music, Barry?”

“No,” Barry said. “I write for the classical music section of the Neverwinter Music Magazine.”

Lup just stared at him for a second, a bit transfixed at his little attitude. She stood up straight, bit back her smirk, and said, “Okay. Classical. That’s fancy.” Then she had a thought. “Is that how you know Kravitz? Through—”

Lup got distracted when she noticed Barry staring at something behind her. She turned to look out to the bar area, where Taako was posing against a wall wearing Kravitz’s black cape, and Kravitz was standing two feet back taking pictures of him on a phone.

Lup looked back at Barry, who was smiling and shaking his head again, and she finished her question, asking, “Work?”

“Look at me,” Barry said, gesturing to his plain t-shirt and jeans. “If he didn’t have to sit next to me for eight hours straight every day, there’s no way he would be friends with me.”

Lup giggled. “He writes about, what, steampunk remixes?”

“Wrong again. Try good ol’ rock ‘n’ roll.”

Lup clicked her tongue. “You boys are something else here in Neverwinter.” She watched Barry give her an awkward look.

He said, “How long are you in town, by the way?”

“Tonight’s our last night,” Lup said. She shrugged, stepping even closer to the keyboard and leaning over it to tell Barry, “Gotta make the most of it while it lasts.” She smirked and backed away.

Turning around to look out at the crowd, Lup set down her water bottle next to her bass. She readjusted her mic stand, watching a group of six more people flood into the bar.

She walked back over to Barry and caught him just before he made it offstage. “Hey,” She said, stopping him. “Have a drink before the show. Just a beer. It’ll help with the nerves.”

Barry stared at her blankly for a moment, and then claimed, “I’m not nervous.”

“Barry, I have eyes. I can see that you’re about to shit your pants.” Lup pulled a coin out of her pocket and tried to hand it to him. “On me. I can’t have one, I’ve already had three.”

“Oh, no, it’s—”

“Barry,” Lup stopped him. “I’m a famous rockstar. I can afford it.” She pushed the gold into his hand and pushed him offstage.

Barry was standing at the back of the stage, hitting chords on someone else’s keyboard, and watching Lup rock out on her bass as she sang for the crowd. Her voice pure and strong, her hands playing deftly, her hair whipping around, she was the most beautiful person Barry had ever seen. He watched her, useless and trapped behind the keyboard, heart jumping around every time she turned around to come play next to him or just to wink at him. Barry liked this band. He liked this crowd more than he thought he would. And he liked Lup.

Maybe not as much as Kravitz liked Taako, Barry considered, watching his coworker jump and scream in front of Taako. Kravitz had been frantic that morning at work, rambling about a bar, an elf, and Coconut Milk (his completely black cat). When Barry had calmed him down enough to explain what happened, Kravitz acted like Taako was his soulmate. Maybe he was right, Barry thought, watching Taako shake and shimmy with his guitar, obviously staring only at Kravitz. Whatever was happening there, he was happy his friend seemed so happy.

Weird that he was then crushing on Taako’s twin sister, but maybe Barry didn’t really care. All he felt like caring about was watching Lup jump around in her fishnets, shorts, and ripped black shirt. He felt the bass deep in his stomach as he played, and tried not to think about how much fun he was having.

They played loud and rocked hard. The audience loved it, and Lup ended the show sweaty and high on adrenaline. This was when she felt on top of the world. The crowd roared in her face, still cheering, and she stood to watch it happen, swinging her bass back and forth. She smirked down at the fans right in front of her, and then over at Taako, who was glowing.

Lup remembered herself and turned around, immediately walking to the back of the stage. She stepped around the keyboard and pulled Barry into a one-armed hug. “Good show. You killed it,” She said, giving him a small smile, and she liked the nervous little smile she got from Barry in return.

“Great show, you guys,” Merle told them backstage. The five of them were a bit cramped for space in the tiny area, and Lup accidentally jabbed her elbow into Barry’s side.

“Ow!” He said.

“Lup, stop that,” Merle said, and flipped through his pages until he found the right one. “Right. Here’s the schedule for tonight.”

Lup stood up straighter and looked over at Barry to teasingly glare at him.

“We pack up in an hour, I need you back here, in an hour,” Merle repeated, for their benefit. “Then I’ll let you know what time we’re leaving.”

“Yes, sir,” Magnus said.

Merle looked up at them expectantly and said, “Don’t die, don’t kill anyone else, and don’t get married.” And then he was gone.

“What an inspirational man,” Taako remarked.

Magnus said, “Great show, Barry. Thanks. Gotta go!” and ran towards the bar, presumably to tackle his girlfriend at the merch table.

The door hadn’t even swung shut when someone else grabbed it and walked through to backstage—Kravitz. “Taako!” He said.

“Kravitz!” Taako shouted.

Kravitz ran down the hall, crying to Taako, “You were so good, it was such a good show,” and then they were kissing, a shiny black cape flying around and jewelry clacking together.

Lup took a step back to give them a bit more space, and she gave Barry a silly look over her shoulder as she squished closer to him.

Once Kravitz could pull his face away, he rushed over to Barry, saying, “Barry, you were so good, you did amazing.” He wrapped his arms around Barry’s head in an interesting-looking hug, and Lup just stepped back to glance at Taako.

He was also leaning back, and giving her a concerned looking and mouthing, BARRY?

Lup just shrugged, and nodded.

“—you are a rockstar, Barry, I always knew it—”

Then, Lup held up a hand at Taako. Then two fingers. And then mouthed, GOTH. CLOWN.

Taako held up his middle finger, and Lup flipped him off right back, and that was the exact second Kravitz and Barry turned around.

“What—”

“Nothing,” Taako said, and starting pulling Kravitz towards the bar. “Remember, we’re—”

“To, going to the—”

“The place.”

“Yeah. Bye!” Kravitz yelled, and they disappeared through the door.

When the door slammed back shut, Lup looked over at Barry.

He gave her a nervous smile and said, “Thanks for letting me play with you, and thanks for helping me.” He motioned to the back door. “I should get—”

“You can’t leave,” Lup interrupted. “Have a drink with me.”

Barry looked surprised. “It’s pretty late, I—”

“Please?” Lup asked nicely.

Forty-five minutes later, Lup and Barry were each on their third cocktails. They were at a low table by the bar, and the music and crowd were defeneningly loud. Lup threw back her drink and stared intently at Barry. “I don’t want to shout!” She shouted.

He blinked. “What?”

“You look like a girl scout!”

“...I can’t hear you!”

Lup rolled her eyes. “Do you want to make out?”

“Yes,” Barry said.

Lup stared at him, wondering if her half-joking question had worked or if he was fucking with her. She stared at his discerning, hesitant face, and couldn’t tell a thing. So she shifted closer to him, leaning in until her face was inches away from his.

He stared into her eyes.

“Sure about that, Mozart?”

Barry didn’t say anything, and he didn’t move.

So Lup kissed him, squishing their noses together and holding him still in the bouncing bar. Barry pushed forwards and reached for her shoulder, so she held his face and kissed him deeper.

“Barry,” She whispered contentedly when they readjusted and broke apart for half a second. She kissed him, pulling him as close as possible. Barry kissed her back steady and gentle, seeming fairly sure of himself for a man who tried to escape out the back door an hour ago.

Lup arrived backstage exactly when Merle expected her, towing Barry behind her, holding her hand. They joined Magnus and Julia, who were closely intertwined, and Kravitz and Taako, looking a bit too pleased with themselves.

Merle looked at Lup’s hand hanging tightly onto Barry and said, “Oh, jeez.”

Kravitz held up a little thumbs-up to Barry.

“Okay, look,” Merle explained, “The owner had some cancellations and now she has a few more open spots this week. She wants us to stay ‘til Thursday.”

Taako gasped in delight, but Magnus said, “But we don’t have Johann!”

Everyone looked over at Barry, so Lup turned to him, and smiled. “Whaddya say, will you play with us?” She asked.

“Um, yeah—yes,” Barry said.

Lup laughed and hugged him. She heard Taako and Magnus cheering. She gave Barry one last squeeze around the shoulders and let him go, turning back to face Merle. “Yeah, I think we should stay here a bit longer.”

“Let’s do it!” Magnus yelled.

“The ayes have it,” Merle declared. “Forget tear-down, you are officially free to par-tay.”

They all whooped and cheered, and it felt like New Year’s Eve when Lup pulled Barry in to kiss his cheek under a karaoke night poster.

Thank you so much for reading! If you’d like to see more of my writing, all my info is here.

#taznc #taz november celebration #taz #taakitz #blupjeans #taz balance #mine*

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mollymauk-teafleak · 4 years

Text

A Gentleman’s Guide to Dancing (chapter three)

I am so very sorry this has been such a long time coming. It’s a Taakitz Austen/Little Women style AU in case anyone’s forgot, I wouldn’t blame you!

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Please comment on Ao3!

Chapters: 1, 2, 3

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“You know he actually invited you, right?”

Taako looked up from fussing with his lapels. Caught between dressing overly formally and overly casually, he’d ended up with an outfit that was a bastardisation of both, trousers with a hole in the knee on the bottom and a poet’s shirt with an absurd amount of ruffles on top. He was trying not to think about how ridiculous he looked, trying to convince himself that if he could get the lapels of his jacket to lie flat, that would fix it.

“What?” his amber eyes were sharp as they faced his sister, sat on the stairs and watching him pace by the door. Too sharp but she’d hit right at the heart of him and it stung. Easier to pretend he didn’t know that and act affronted.

“Kravitz invited you over to the manor,” Lup said patiently, like she was explaining one of the spells she’d mastered and he hadn’t gotten yet, “You don’t have to be so nervous about it. He wants you there.”

“Who says I’m nervous?” Taako sniffed though he knew fne well it was his shaking hands and his restless feet and the twenty minutes he’d spent pacing in front of the door that all said it, loud and clear.

Lup only sat forward, her chin resting on her knuckles and her elbows resting on her knees. Her smile was lopsided, the one they shared.

“What is it you’re going over to do?”

“He...he said we’d have tea,” Taako mumbled, back to fussing with his jacket, “He’d teach me chess. And...and he mentioned something about composing his own music when he was hear the other day. He said he’d play me some.”

Lup’s face lit up with a knowing delight Taako didn’t like at all. He was starting to regret telling her about how the Countess’ ward had come to visit him, how they’d baked together. He’d known she’d read things on it that weren’t really there.

You want her to, a sly, truthful part of his mind he’d never gotten along with chimed in, you want to know she sees it too, so you can tell yourself you’re not going crazy.

“Don’t,” Taako said, to Lup and to the voice, turning away to the leaded glass in the door, the blocky, poor painting it made of the country beyond it.

“I didn’t say anything, Koko,” Lup hummed, the smile still in her voice, “I just think it’s nice how you’ve made friends with this guy. You haven’t really clicked with anyone since you first met Merle and Magnus. Poor Barry thought you hated him for a full year.”

Taako grunted, “I never hated him…” If the blacksmith courting his sister had read any animosity in his face whenever he’d return her hime far past dark or would kiss her hand when he thought no one was looking, that was his prerogative.

But, he had to admit, he’d softened on the guy lately. It was hard to stay so cold with someone who made your other half smile in a way you’d thought you’d never see again.

“I know that,” Lup said, “It’s just good to see you letting someone else in. And Kravitz seems really nice. Not like you at all but...nice.”

Taako bristled a little, like a cat being petted against the grain of his fur, “Since when is he Kravitz to you?”

“Since we spoke,” Lup shrugged airily, “Just yesterday actually.”

“What?” he whirled, sending his enormous hat slipping over one eye and leaving him to find some dignified way to fix it.

Lup ignored his tone, examining a small hole in her skirt, “I was going to take Barry some lunch at the shop and he was coming back from the post office. I was worried he’d thought I was you but he knew immediately. Thought that was strange, no one’s been able to do that on sight since Auntie. He was jumping at every cart and carriage going past like an owl in daylight, bless his heart, but he stopped and talked to me for a while. Managed to mention you a few more times than was strictly necessary.”

The corner of her mouth quirked up at that, like a rising inflection, turning it into a trailing thread. Taako scrunched up his nose in response.

“I mean...yeah, he’s nice. He just seems lonely and he was nice enough to visit so I’m returning the favour. Probably be so bored stiff I won’t ever go back but I have to take him up on the invitation at least once. It’s courtesy. That’s all.”

“No one ever said it wasn’t,” Lup replied with maddening patience. Have fun. When you eventually get past the threshold. Which looks like it will be sometime around...never?”

Taako made a strangled noise of exasperation and indignance, sticking his nose in the air and whirling out of the door, just to show that he could. It was only when he was halfway down the path, their Auntie’s lavender plants grown so tall they were tickling his fingertips, that he realised what his sister had done to goad him out of his spiral.

Lup only grinned at him and fluttered her fingers when he made a very rude gesture at her through the window before stomping off in the direction of the big manor. Her smile didn’t fade when the tip of his ridiculous hat had disappeared below the rise of the valley. It just shifted, changed slightly, softened into something that was no less of a smile but felt deeper and sadder.

She remembered how it had felt for her, right at the start. The defensiveness and the doubting and the uncertainty. Dodging and diverting when thoughts strayed too close to where you didn’t want them to go. And then, finally, when you were cornered and had nowhere to go, the crushing realisation that you were falling for someone you weren’t supposed to.

She could only hope it wouldn’t hurt her brother too badly.

It had been so long since Taako had lived somewhere with servants that he jumped a little when someone who wasn’t Kravitz answered the door to the manor. Already on the back foot, he stammered out that he’d been invited, sounding more unconvincing with every word. There was a chilly silence, while the elven butler looked him up and down, taking in his mismatched outfit and the blush rising on his skin, before eventually admitting in a slow, sonorous voice that Master Raven was expecting him. Everything about his expression told Taako loudly and clearly that, if this weren’t the case, he would have been gladly tossed off the premises as soon as he stepped on their porch.

He was shown to the same library from the night of the party, tucked cunningly away so it could never be found unless the flat oaken door was pointed out to you. Or unless you staggered in on pure, desperate happenstance.

“Taako!” Kravitz got to his feet as soon as he walked in, his face lit up so brightly it was hard for the elf to tell himself he wasn’t genuinely delighted to see him.

“Hey there,” he grinned back, it was hard not to, and grasped his forearm in greeting, “Sorry, I know we said midday, I got caught up with, ah…”

“Oh it’s absolutely fine,” Kravitz tilted his head, saving Taako from having to come up with something that delayed him that wasn’t his own anxiety, “You’re here now and I don’t have to crawl the walls with boredom any more. At least, not by myself.”

As before, his easy humour and earnestness had Taako relaxing despite himself. Enough that, after tea had been sent for and Kravitz had turned the blinds to gentle the afternoon sun into a pleasing ambery gold glow in the library, he was actually glad he’d come.

“You spend a lot of time here, huh?” Taako sank into the same chair he’d occupied at the party, “That’s the second time you’ve talked about being bored.”

Kravitz shrugged, sitting back down, lounging in a very unlordly way. It gave Taako the confidence to tuck his own legs underneath him and sprawl in the way he liked to do, very different from the stiff backed position he had to hold himself in around the other gentry.

“I sound like I’m complaining, don’t I?” he sighed, “I don’t mean to, it’s only that Mistress never leaves the manor and I’d walked the length of the village in less than a morning. The fault is mine, most likely, I’m struggling to adjust to a...well, a quieter pace of life than the cities.”

Taako blinked curiously, plucking a horse from the chess set between them and fidgeting with it, “So...you’ve been to Goldcliff? And Rockport? All those places?”

Kravitz nodded, “All of them. It’s wonderful being in amongst so many people, this messy tangle of so many different lives. You could meet a hundred different stories just by walking through the squares. And they’re unique too, each one has its own rhythm. When you’re there, you know there’s nowhere else like it in the world. Nowhere has ale like you find in Rockport, only in Goldcliff can you find that kind of architecture, it’s amazing. But it isn’t just the cities! There’s wonders all between them, like the elven forests and the red canyons and the deserts and thousands of little villages and towns between, unlike anywhere else. And even though you’re sad to leave each one, you get the excitement of knowing you’ll experience it all again, finding somewhere new. And…” his ears darkened and his smile slipped, “And I’ve been talking for too long, haven’t I?”

Taako blinked, shaking himself out of the visions Kravitz’s words had been painting around him, “No, no, it’s fine. I...I was enjoying listening to you. I’ve never been anywhere like that myself, after all. I’ve never been beyond the valley.” It made him feel foolish to say so, in front of someone so travelled.

Kravitz smiled softly, “You’d love it Taako. And they’d love you.”

That was so absurd, he snorted aloud, before blushing and covering his mouth behind a hand, as if that would erase the embarrassment.

But Kravitz didn’t seem concerned by the social faux pas, though something was creasing his brow and deepening his dark eyes, “You don’t believe me.”

Taako’s ears came down to bracket his face, “It’s just...people can maybe take a few hours with me at the most and then the shine kind of comes off the old penny. You know, words like ‘acerbic’ and ‘vexing’ start coming out, the polite, high society ways of saying I’m annoying. And then I normally do something ridiculous to make them out and out hate me before everything can just fall apart in that slow, agonising kind of way. Don’t want to even think about how I’d embarrass myself in somewhere like Goldcliff.”

Kravitz was still and silent, long enough that Taako was worried he’d just gone and done that ‘something ridiculous’ without even realising it. They both jumped out of their skins when the knock at the door sounded, the servant with their tea. As it was all laid out before them, piece by black enamelled piece, agonisingly slow, Taako sank further and further into the chair, feeling his skin take flame and wondering if he could bolt out of the door left open by the butler. But the whole time, those dark eyes were fixed on him, curious and impossible to read beyond that.

When the door closed again after Kravitz’s quiet thank you, he spoke in his same soft tones and Taako realised he’d only been choosing his words with a careful exactness.

“But what about me, Taako? I enjoy your company more and more each time I see you. And I can’t imagine my opinion ever changing, when I know you better.”

Taako felt for a moment as if he couldn’t breathe. His hands fluttered anxiously, reaching for a teacup then thinking better of it, going to the sugar, the milk, even with nothing to put them in. After a moment, they found Kravitz’s own, bumping into each other like it was a simple coincidence. But then Kravitz squeezed his gently, allowing them to shake in his sure grip. It could be a gesture of comfort from one friend to another.

Or it could not.

What about you indeed?

Taako swallowed, risking a glance up at Kravitz who still had that gentle smile on his face, like all he wanted to do was help. Like he meant it all with a pure earnestness Taako had never encountered with anyone else. It was what relaxed him when he’d first stepped into the library, this time and the last, but now he felt like what was going to break him apart.

He could have said so many things when his mouth fell open but good sense finally prevailed and in a slightly hysteric voice he barked out, “So chess, huh?”

Kravitz blinked, looking dismayed for a fraction of a second when the elf snatched his hands back.

“Gonna teach me how to play?” he grinned, practised at throwing up smiles to mask panic and distress, “You promised.”

“I...I did, didn’t I?” Kravitz followed his lead, though his smile wasn’t as practised, some of the confusion and maybe even a little bit of hurt showing around the edges, “Though you must promise not to get better than me, let me keep my dignity for a few days at least?”

Taako tilted his head, smirking, “Well, we’ll just have to see. I’m making no promises…”

He didn’t have to, not at the start. For a few games, he was beaten fairly resoundingly while the rules sank in. Taako was grateful for it, as much as he didn’t like losing. The strategy and remembering all the rules through a sugary fog of strong tea helped keep his mind off how soft Kravitz’s skin had felt against his own, how cool and pleasant it had been, how just an inch would have slid their fingers through each other in such a perfectly fitting pattern than nothing could have made them let go, not if they didn’t want to.

But thoughts like that were unacceptable. So he thought of knights and rooks and little black and white squares and how to mage hand Kravitz’s pieces off the board and to his side so he might believe he’d taken more than he had. The last never worked, Kravitz would only laugh and steal his pieces back with quick and clever hands when Taako was distracted.

And before too long, only one and a half games in, it was as if it had never happened. Almost. A traitorous part of Taako’s mind was still thinking how the cool ebony of his pieces didn’t feel all that different from Kravitz’s hand. But almost was good enough.

Eventually, when the tea was just black speckled dregs in the bottom of their cups, Taako got to his feet.

“I should head back,” he noted the colour of the sky, far darker than he’d meant to let it get, “My sister will be wondering where I am. She’s a terrible grump when she gets hungry.”

“Of course,” Kravitz nodded politely, rising to show him to the door like a good gentleman, “Will I...I mean, you know you’re welcome any time?”

There was a nervousness in his voice that he wasn’t even trying to hide, a careful hopefulness like he was telling himself not to get too excited. And Taako knew he was thinking about that moment where their hands had touched and he’d spoken so tenderly, worrying and wondering if it had been too much. Wondering if he’d ruined something good.

Taako knew that feeling. He straightened the front of his jacket and smiled, fully, so the gap in his teeth would show.

“Of course I’ve got to come back. I almost had you at the end there, I’m not giving up until I have victory.”

The relief that flooded over Kravitz’s face was so genuine and real it was hard for Taako to look for a moment, “Then I shall have to practise…”

Taako very deliberately didn’t think about what that meant as they made their polite, formal goodbyes and he was turned back out into the air, grown cold and thick now evening had fallen and stolen the thin warmth of the winter sun. The walk back to their house felt longer now than it had in the opposite direction.

And as he walked Taako thought of what he would make for their supper with what little was left in the pantry, he thought of checks and pawns and how white always moved first, he thought of stalemates.

But that annoying little part still whispered what about him?

Taako did go back, every day for the next week and every time it got easier. Worryingly, maddeningly easier.

The next time, Kravitz presented him with a small, elegantly decorated package with the stamp of a Goldcliff bakery on the top. Inside were perfectly baked, exquisitely formed macarons, shining with sugar and even coloured coal black. Taako laughed aloud at that and quickly comforted Kravitz when his expression turned stricken, he’d only been appreciating his commitment to a theme.

Taako had read about the high class bakeries and lauded restaurants you could find across the continent, mostly from his cookery books. But he’d never thought to actually taste anything from one of them before, their wares were expensive. Taako didn’t even want to think about what it would have cost to have even these few cookies sent to their little valley. There was a lot of it he didn’t want to think about.

He didn’t want to bite into it and break the magic of that perfect almond scented shell but he was so glad when he eventually did, blackberries thick and rich on his tongue. High on joy and sugar, he’d gone on for nearly an hour about flavour balance and texture and how recipes travelled from place to place and shifted from being only for the rich to being everyday staples. A hundred times he told himself to shut up, that he’d gone on for far too long and Kravitz was bored stiff. But somehow he didn’t think so, seeing how he still leaned forward with his eyes wide and open, his mouth turned up in an admiring smile.

And when he brought one of the macarons home for Lup, she’d given him a smirk that had made him blush and make an excuse to leave the room.

The next time Taako turned up at the door holding a folder that looked like moths had been at it for decades. It wouldn’t be far wrong, give or take a few years. As soon as Kravitz saw it, the apologies came tumbling from Taako’s lips, it was stupid, it was just some old trash, he’d happily throw it in the fire right now if he wanted. But slowly, surely, Kravitz got out of him that it was a collection of sheet music he’d found in the attic, it had belonged to his Auntie. She’d loved to play piano, he said, eyes firmly fixed on his feet, drenched in snowmelt. And now she was gone, Taako had just thought he might like them. Most of the songs were in Elvish, it was old and probably boring and, gods, he’d never even asked what instrument you play…

He’d been well and truly worked up when Kravitz had gasped, the folder open in his lap. His eyes had been wide as a child presented with a jar full of sweets, his jaw dropped, fingers gentle as he stroked the yellowed pages with their carefully printed notes. He’d thanked Taako so sincerely and softly, like those brittle sheafs of songs waiting to be wrought in pulls and snaps of those clever fingers were a gift worth every bit as much as those macarons, maybe even more.

And Taako had suddenly been so glad he’d spent the entire morning digging the music out and had turned up to tea late and with dust clumps in his braid, just for the look on his face.

Kravitz had given him something of the world beyond their valley so Taako gave him something wholly from it, from a part that meant a lot to him. Kravitz’s gift said there is a place for you out there, Taako’s said there is a place for you here. And both learned something more about themselves.

The next day, Kravtiz brought it together so beautifully by finally playing for Taako.

The answer to what instrument he played was apparently all of them, there was a room of the manor entirely given over to them all. A sleek black grand piano ruled as king but it had a flock of attendants, a flute, a violin, a chello, even instruments Taako couldn’t name. It was practically a museum to every form and shape of music all over the world, as much a testament to where Kravitz had travelled as his stories.

Kravitz watched his face carefully, his grin spreading as he saw his awe. And then he’d guided Taako to sit on the piano bench, lovingly taken the violin down from it’s stand and stood before him, not like someone would if they were performing for an audience but something softer and more vulnerable, more intimate. That word, even spoken in Taako’s own mind, made him tense a little but there was just no other word for it. He was being let in to something that used to be a secret, doors opening to him that hadn’t opened before. Just like when Kravitz had stumbled into his kitchen and he’d allowed him to stay, this was Kravitz showing a part of himself that had grown so comfortable in hiding.

This was what let Kravitz be himself in a world that told him he couldn’t.

And he did it so well. Taako knew his Auntie had loved music, she’d played the guitar out on the porch on soft summer nights while Taako and Lup would chase each other through the meadows out the back of the house. Listening to Kravitz made him feel a way that was the same and different, all at once. The notes and instrument and hands were different but it was the same feeling of his chest opening wide enough to hold anything it wanted. The same feeling that this moment would go on forever and there would never need to be anything else.

But Taako didn’t want this moment to go on forever. As he sat and listened to the high, swooping notes shivering on their strings and melting together into something beautiful as Kravitz flexed his fingers and drew his bow back and forth, he wanted it to grow. He wanted more.

The song ended before Taako was ready and there were a few reasons his eyes were wet, some he’d be willing to say and some he’d rather die than speak out loud. Kravitz looked at him shyly, a man with his heart on display as recklessly as a child, and asked what he thought. Taako smiled, wiped his eyes on his sleeve and asked why Kravitz bothered studying magic when he could do something more magical than he’d ever seen in a book. He blushed the way he did everything, handsomely, and grinned in delight. They didn’t move from the music room for the rest of the day, Kravitz explaining how each instrument works and showing more of his compositions, excitedly taking Taako through nearly every note and why he’d placed it that way, showing him the thought and care in every song. Taako didn’t leave the manor until the sun had gone down, far later than was strictly socially acceptable for two young men to be alone together.

Taako had fallen asleep that night with soft, beautiful music wandering around his mind rather than worries and uncertain deadlines and murky futures.

Through it all, every day, there were chess games, around their moments of growing closeness. Taako got better quickly, picking up the rules and seeing strategies and plays he wouldn’t have noticed before. He learned Kravitz’s style, clever and strategic but predictable, and started to answer with his own, slightly manic, high risk high reward approach. With this he began to see ways to win, though few and far between, openings and paths and attacks he could nudge into motion and steal his first victory.

But he never did. Not once. And every game would end with the same joke, that he’d just have to come back tomorrow, that he wouldn’t give up until he’d won a game.

Their days together were full of ways out that neither of them took.

Taako wondered how the old black manor house had ever made him nervous. When it decided to remind him, it came as a nasty shock.

He no longer felt the need to be ferried from place to place by the sour elven butler, when he needed the bathroom, he just got up, announced the fact and flounced out of the door. Kravitz hadn’t minded, sat in the window seat to get the best of the pale afternoon sunlight and wiping rosin off his violin strings, only made him promise not to get in trouble on the way there and back.

“Who do you think you’re talking to?” Taako snorted, golden hair bouncing as he shook his head.

He managed to be half right, nothing happened on the way there, despite him happily wandering through a mansion that wasn’t his own in just his socks, his shirt opened two buttons from the top because he liked to sit close to the fire like a cat but despised sweating, humming one of Kravitz’s songs. It was on the way back that he ran into the trouble.

One moment Taako was wandering the halls, eager to get back to Kravitz and hear him tune. He loved that part, even though it wasn’t music, he loved listening to Kravitz find the notes in the discord and steer it towards something perfect and clear and pure. He loved listening to the journey.

One moment he was walking. And the next moment, there was a ghost at the end of the corridor he’d just walked into. He only just managed not to scream and was proud of himself for that but he did jump noticeably.

“Master Taco,” the ghost took a slow step forward and became an almost impossibly tall woman in what seemed to be a flowing mourning dress and a gossamer thin veil covering her face. Except it wasn’t her face. It was a perfectly circular, bright white china mask, painted with a delicately beautiful but otherworldly face. There was no ornament to her except a silver bird skull worn around her cloth wrapped throat, “How wonderful to finally meet you.”

“Countess Raven…” Taako stammered. Now that a few seconds had passed, he was honestly less disturbed by her appearance than her seeing the hole in his sock that one toe was poking through. It was hard to find someone who dressed like this intimidating when you spent all of your free time with your new best friend who wore black silks and rings with silvered skulls set into them.

“I have heard much about you from my ward,” Actually no, it was a little spooky to hear a voice and see no lips moving as she walked towards him, seeming to hover across the carpet because her skirt covered her shoes and there was barely a whisper in it, “I only regret how long it has taken us to meet in person. Please, join me in my parlour if you would.”

She moved to a door just between them, a gloved hand appearing from the folds of her dress to turn the handle. Taako shivered, what were the chances they just happened to meet right outside the room she wanted him to enter? Had she been watching him? All of a sudden the rumours that surrounded this sorceress and the possibility of eyes in the walls prickled the wrong way up his spine.

But then he told himself he was being foolish. He reminded himself of what this woman was to Kravitz and everything she’d done for him. And he followed her through the door.

It was a surprisingly cosy room, for it’s darkness. There was a fire, like there was in every one of these high ceilinged rooms, filling the space with it’s merrily crackling voice. There were books lining the walls in towering shelves, the spines showing a multitude of languages. There were candles, their scents of clove and citrus peel buoying the smell of burning wood into something very pleasant. All the furniture was in dark wood, expensive and ornate. And of course there was a chess set, old and dented, set on a side table. Taako imagined the countess teaching a younger Kravitz to play and smiled.

“I promise I won’t keep you from my ward for very long,” her voice was smooth and not marred at all by age, “I simply felt it improper that we hadn’t been formally introduced yet, with you spending so much time with him.”

Taako flushed and didn’t take a seat when she did, standing and holding one arm like a schoolboy dragged before the headmaster. The word ‘improper’ was what stopped him in his tracks, pinned him awkwardly like a butterfly under glass, one of a host of words that pricked him in his nightmares. There was a lot about how he thought of Kravitz that fit the description, only in his own head of course though he was wondering just how much those hidden eyes could know.

“I mean...he has become a good friend to me, my lady,” Taako cleared his throat, one hand going to his throat to hold his shirt together but there was nothing he could do about his lack of shoes, “I am simply...we share some interests and…”

“I think you have misunderstood me, Master Tacco,” she saved him from his miserably stumbling, politely interjecting, “I brought you here to thank you.”

Taako blinked, uncertain he’d heard her, “Thank me?”

She seemed to choose her words carefully, just as Kravitz always did. The longer he was in her presence, the more similarities Taako could see between them.

“My ward is a very accomplished gentleman,” the countess said, the tone in her voice barely shifting, “Witty and talented and kind natured. Powerful too, gifted in his magic. And yet he struggles to connect with people, to make friends as it were. I fear this is something he inherited from myself, or else something I neglected to teach him. There is a natural loneliness to him that easily turns to sadness on his darker days.”

Taako could see that. It was the same sadness inside him, though Kravitz clearly preferred to turn inwards to it, whereas Taako grew louder and louder to drown it out. He suspected neither of them were very successful.

“I will not tell you how he came to be my ward, that is his own tale to tell. I haven’t told you anything you didn’t already know, I think,” something behind the arctic cold mask sparkled that might have been her eyes, it was hard to say, “But I worry about him. I worry there are things I cannot save him from. Though, Master Tacco, you seem to have that power.”

Taako felt his face redden more, clearing his throat, “I...I wouldn’t call it a power, my lady, I just...I just care about him. There is no effort in it.”

“Even one such as me can see that. And this is why I wanted to thank you, Taako. I wanted to thank you for seeing him, as he is, and letting him in.”

“Ah, well…” Taako felt like those painted eyes were staring into him, past his skin, seeing things that he hadn’t wanted anyone to see. And yet she didn’t seem angry or disgusted or even surprised.

“And if I may be so bold, as I often am...I encourage you to let him do the same. I have seen the way he looks at you, I have heard how he speaks of you. Forgive an old lady dispensing wisdom where it hasn’t been asked for but I do wonder if you both couldn’t find a deal of happiness in each other. Or at least...a fulfilment. An understanding. Something to fill a need you share.”

Taako didn’t know how much more he could take, his pulse racing and palms sweating. Was he reading too much into it? Making ridiculous leaps and bounds between her words? Gods, what did she want him to say?

“But I am rambling. I’ve kept you from him for too long, you may return to the library, Master Tacco. Thank you for indulging me and...think on what I’ve said or dismiss it as you see fit,” with a movement of her hand, the door swung open again.

Most of Taako wanted to flee through it as soon as it revealed itself, some wanting to keep running right out the door and back to his safe, familiar house and his safe, familiar hiding places, to check the king and win the game. But there was still that one little bit...and wasn’t it always that which got him into trouble?

Instead of running, he bowed poliety and summoned up every scrap of bravery he had, which really wasn’t very much at all but proved just enough to say, “I will think about it, my lady. I promise.” And to mean it.

The smooth, bone mask inclined in a satisfied nod, “Then return to your chess, Master Tacco. I hope you and Kravitz can find what you seek.”

With a nod, Taako ducked out of the Countess’ parlour and continued down the halls, taking a few wrong turns in his distraction and ending up somewhere he didn’t mean to be. It was only because the sound of his footfalls changed so much when he stumbled out onto the polished wood that he noticed he was standing in the ballroom from the night of the rout not that long ago.

It was jarring to see it empty, at first, when last time it had been so full and rich with music, fine silk and candlelight. It was like a chest with no heart and lungs, bare and empty and devoid of its purpose. For a moment, Taako was frozen by the horror of being somewhere he wasn’t meant to be.

But he was also alone, no one to scorn him or cast him out. So he gave himself a moment, stepping across the parquet flooring, looking up at the grand chandelier with it’s drips of wax frozen in time and the black, sleek arches of the ceiling. He’d run from it before so it was nice to be able to appreciate it, away from the eyes and cold, cruel, polite smiles that had driven him away.

Some of the bravery still lingering, Taako made slow, spiraling circles and imagined a very different party in the same hall. He imagined Lup there, in her best dress but brand new and with no subtle mending, Barry on her arm, the two of them dancing happily. He imagined his friends, Magnus and Merle and Lucretia and Davenport, laughing and making their jokes, louder and far more fun than would ever normally be allowed somewhere like that. The Countess Raven perhaps, if she wanted, sitting in a chair and watching it all from behind her mask.

And Kravitz. Kravitz smiling and holding himself proudly, his eyes bright as Taako took his arm and adoration clear on his handsome face. The two of them dancing, the way a man would with a woman, openly and freely with no need to hide, to music Kravitz had written, everyone able to see how beautiful it was. And how beautiful they were.

Taako stopped, suddenly finding his lower lip trembling and needing to focus so he could hold it at bay. The music faded in his ears and the faces of his friends dissipated, like snow on a breeze. He was alone again, in his socks and threadbare clothes playing at being luxury, with his two large ears and the gap in his front teeth.

He could think about it all he wanted, that much he’d promised. But it wouldn’t change the fact that he could want and want until his heart broke and it would never mean he would have it. Wanting couldn’t change the world, not in his experience. Wouldn’t it have happened by now, if it could? He’d been wanting for a long damn time, after all.

Taako gave a shuddery sigh and turned himself around, following the same route he’d taken that night to get back to the library, back to Kravitz and chess.

Because that much he was allowed.

A week. That was as long as they were allowed even that small happiness.

Because the end of the seventh day was when Taako shut the front door of Auntie’s house against the winter wind and gathering night, whistling as he unwound his scarf and hung it with his coat on the peg. He smiled, content and happy and full of warm tea and sugar, stepping out of his shoes and thinking of supper and how he would read by the fire, Lup’s feet in his lap and her fingers weaving a braid into his hair. And how another day just like it would be waiting for him tomorrow.

He knew something was wrong as he stepped into the kitchen. There was no fire in the hearth, it was cold and ashy. There was no light, no heat, no life in the house that hadn’t even lost its heart after Auntie died. Everything was quiet, the silence the ringing sort that filled the space, like the few seconds after being struck with a blow so hard it made everything rock and tip.

Lup was sat at the table, her eyes red and raw, her hands shaking as she folded and unfolded the letter with its stiff official paper and stark black type.

“Lulu?” Taako murmured, voice hollow already, even not knowing. But he could guess.

His sister slid the letter across to him, her chin setting in misery as that small action brought fresh tears. He picked it up and read, an action he struggled with at the best of times but even more so when his heart was hammering sickeningly and the words were ones he didn’t want to read.

The bank had run out of patience. They had a week to come up with the full amount to purchase the house before it became the property of the bank and they were trespassing on the floorboards they’d walked every day for the best years of their lives. The figure still left to pay was so far out of what they currently had, it may as well have been the number of stars in the sky.

“Taako,” Lup’s voice trembled, “What are we going to do?”

He couldn’t answer. He looked for those ways out now, the move he’d need to make to win this game but he couldn’t see it, it was impossible. He’d been doomed to fail from the start, doomed by his hesitance, his recklessness, his selfishness. He and his sister would be right back where they’d started their lives, homeless and without safety, scared and alone and exactly where he’d promised her they would never be again.

And what was he going to do?

Taako let the letter fall, looking at Lup helplessly, seeing the five minutes that made him the oldest stretch to an impossible distance between them, littered with all his broken promises. But not so far he couldn’t see the terror in her eyes.

What he did was what he’d always done when things had become difficult.

Taako turned on his heel and he ran.

#taakitz #taako #kravitz #lup #lup/barry #regency au #aggtd #please comment!#angst #its getting sad guys #taz balance #the adventure zone

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admutual · 4 years

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any hayley or steve childhood headcanons hell add stan if thats ok!!

oo !!

hayley ones:

hayley was always bringing weird animals inside and trying to convince stan and francine to let her keep them. multiple instances of her running inside, covered in dirt, and holding a garter snake begging ‘please please can we keep her??’ while steve screams in terror.

that hc i mentioned of francine always standing up for the other kids ,, hayley inherited that trait. my god she was The Most protective kid during her school years, she absolutely refused to let anyone get walked over when she knew they didn’t deserve it.

hayley was a wolf girl growing up,, change my mind. and black wolves were always her fave.

hayley definitely read animorphs growing up. those books shaped her and her fave character was cassie,,, also once she got more comfortable with living with roger she bullied him for not looking as cool as an andalite or a hork-bajir.

hayley went through an emo phase during her middle and high school years. she tried really hard to get an emo fringe, she was always blasting mcr and the used and three days grace, and her first job was at a hot topic.

hayley and stan were obviously tight-knit buds back in the day. like ,, she’d set up tea parties for them in the backyard, going out to movies was almost a weekly activity for the two of them, they were always planning picnics together,, they were really close. also every time they went to familyland together, hayley was always trying to drag him along with her to the more Extreme rides. francine kept telling her she’d go since she knew stan wasn’t the biggest fan of those rides like she was, but hayley kept insisting and it’d always end with stan near traumatized. big cia man goes on scary missions daily but he can’t handle a little roller coaster.

hayley’s hair was . pretty often a Mess when she was young. it was staticky, always sticking up at some angle, she often got too excited that she never took the time to comb out her hair in the mornings. plus it’s always been a habit of hers to play with her hair whenever she gets too excited or nervous, so even if she got it all straightened out it’d still turn into a mess by the end of the day.

hayley was always covered in scrapes and bruises. there was never a day where she didn’t have a bandaid somewhere.

she was a really tall kid during elementary school. she was almost always the tallest kid in her class. around high school everyone outgrew her though and now she’s . really short compared to most people her age, but yeah when she was little . Tall Girl (2019).

hayley skateboarded in middle school, and she was really damn good at it. she got in loads of trouble for skateboarding on school property and she thought she was the coolest kid for doing it.

stan and francine tried really hard not to curse around hayley when she was little (once steve came around they gave up trying), but occasionally something would slip out and hayley would always parrot it. stan looking at a bill and muttering ‘shit’ and then in the living room hearing what is obviously a toddler screaming ‘SHIT’

hayley, like steve, was always kinda lonely during her school years. steve eventually found friends in snot, barry, toshi, and roger too once he moved in, but hayley never really learned proper social skills as she was often pushed away for being the loud rowdy ‘annoying’ kid, and they always viewed her attempts to try to get close to others as too ‘desperate’. she has found friends in her adulthood, but yeah during her childhood she mostly just stuck around her family.

hayley was That Kid who would always use those fake clip-on earrings you’d get from claires, as well as cutting up the spiral from her notebook to use as a fake lip piercing, and she’d spend all day trying to convince her classmates ‘yeah no it’s real’

hayley liked stealing her dad’s camera and using it to film fake vlogs. they have multiple reels that go from cute family videos, to hayley making lps vids and fake cooking tutorials.

hayley drew a lot growing up and francine still has dozens of her drawings magneted to the fridge. hayley’s always cringing and asking her to take them down, but tbh francine’s never going to.

hayley’s always loved being outside at night. occasionally she’d sneak steve out with her to play in the backyard and it’d always lead to them in the treehouse, and stan catching them because they kept shining their flashlight against their bedroom window.

steve ones:

steve’s definitely adhd, autistic, and dyslexic. (the latter’s literally canon, and the two former ones are hcs that to me feel so obvious that i’m always a little hesitant calling it a hc). i really like imagining his parents being really patient with him in this area, even stan learned to be more composed and gentle with him when it came to this, and the two of them helping him find ways to cope. francine especially enjoyed nights helping him read.

steve’s interest in birds has been with him for pretty much his entire life, i like to imagine it’s always been his biggest special interest. also i’ve noticed there’s random scenes where stan’s displayed a bit of an interest or at least an appreciation of birds, so i kinda like to imagine stan used to take steve to the park for birdwatching trips when he was young before steve started going with roger. sometimes francine and hayley would tag along, but mostly it was just stan taking steve out and listening to him ramble about all the birds he’s spotting,, every time steve had a bad day stan’s immediate solution was to take him to the park.

when roger first moved in, he and steve were inseparable. steve was obsessed with learning everything about him and his species and his home planet, while roger saw steve as the one safe person to be around (francine, hayley, and klaus were still anxious towards him while stan was too strict and controlling for him). for a good few months until he started bonding with the rest of the fam roger would get really mopey whenever steve would go to school or leave to hang with his other friends, and the second steve walked through that door roger would excitedly hug him and try to lead him off to go do something together.

@a-d-lesbian got me into the hc that steve’s a theater kid and like ,, i’m always thinking about steve getting a tiny little background role in a 6th grade christmas show that they were required to do as a class, and he just loses his mind. he convinces stan and francine to let him invite the grandparents, he has francine film every scene he’s in where he just . Stands There. and then after the show when they get home he makes them all rewatch them all because he’s really damn proud of himself.

steve’s fave books growing up were always xenofiction. stuff like warrior cats and guardians of ga’hoole and redwall. he loved that shit. like i’m just imagining him trying to get his friends to larp warrior cats but none of them read it so they don’t know what he wants them to do, and he keeps assigning them warrior cat sonas and calling them by warrior cat names at school,, and he keeps calling god ‘starclan’ (which makes stan. Mad). am i projecting? that’s a secret, i’ll never tell.

steve was absolutely the Anime Kid in middle school. the amount of times he got yelled at for naruto running in the hallways was far too much. and his faves were fruits basket, nichijou, and k-on.

i’m so obviously projecting with my steve hcs here but i’m not gonna stop and i’m gonna say steve’s a trans guy. i know it makes no sense in canon, but canon’s dead it’s mine now. anyways he’s known since around the time he started middle school, and stan and francine love him and support him and i don’t have much else to say without getting Too Projecting, but yeah steve’s trans.

steve was pretty socially anxious growing up. he did get better as he grew older obv, but when he was little he was A Mess in school.

steve loved making flower crowns when he was little. he learned how to in his 2nd grade art class and just obsessed over it for a good few years and he was always making them for the fam. francine, stan, and hayley didn’t mind, they thought it was cute. i can see hayley learning to make them too and the two of them exchanging crowns,, and francine probably learned how to make some too during her college years and steve would always get really excited whenever she tried making some with him. poor roger though, once he moved in, steve took him as his new model and roger was forced to suffer through sitting in the hot sun while steve covered him in flowers.

steve never stopped singing. oh my god, stan loves him but he eventually reached a point where he started hiding their disney movies because steve would always loudly sing along and he just wanted some peace and quiet to work.

i like to imagine klaus has a sibling-esque relationship with pretty much the entire fam, but especially with steve. he was always pretty protective of him despite not really being able to do anything if he got hurt, and klaus was always there to talk to whenever steve needed it.

steve’s always liked to help francine bake. originally it was just so he could claim the mixer of batter before hayley could, but he quickly got really invested and he still loves helping out.

and in general for the both of them:

steve was the type of kid who bonked his head against the table a little and would spend the rest of the night crying while francine comforted him,, while hayley was the type of kid who could fly down the stairs and leave an actual dent in the wall and she’d still jump up assuring everyone ‘i’m okay!!’

hayley and steve used to play pokemon together growing up. hayley was more casually into it while steve was more obsessed (i like to imagine it was a special interest of his growing up). nowadays hayley doesn’t play it too often, but every now and then some big news will happen like new starters getting revealed, and steve will show her and hayley still can’t help but get at least a bit excited each time.

francine tried to do cute little family halloween costumes a few years. the idea of them doing an addams family group costume is precious.

francine always took them out for christmas photos every year. just dozens of photos of the four of them in the tackiest sweaters. they don’t do it as often anymore (or at least they don’t take as many photos outside of a few while they’re setting up the tree) but they still have framed photos of them that they set on the fireplace mantle every year.

listen …….. there were definitely multiple instances when they were really little of stan coming home from work ,, and steve and hayley excitedly tackling him,,,, and stan dramatically acting like he’s being attacked and losing ,,,

despite roger being a Dick, he was super protective of the two of them back in the day. either of them come home from school with a bruise, and roger’s already planning out an elaborate revenge scheme.

as for stan ,,

i’m adopting @stancine’s hc to say he was definitely a country boy. i kinda like to imagine his uncle on his mother’s side lived on a farm, and stan was really close to him growing up and it just sorta became monthly to take weekend trips to see him.

stan loved horses. he was definitely a Horse Kid, and his fave breeds are clydesdales and friesians.

sheep too!! one of his favorite yearly activities is during the springtime when his uncle helps him out with shearing the sheep.

also stan loved camping. he loved going out on walks through the woods and he especially loved fishing, but the second the sun went down he cowered in the back of the tent next to his mom because he was terrified of the noises coming from outside.

stan was a really quiet kid growing up. he sucked at properly standing up for himself, that’s kinda the reason he’s so harsh on steve for accepting mistreatment because he knows how hard it is and he doesn’t want his son to go through the same shit he did.

mother’s day was always one of his favorite holidays. he’d be obsessed with planning the whole day around trying to make it perfect for betty. making her breakfast in bed and saving up his allowance to buy her a gift, and he’d always make elaborate art projects for her every year.

stan . tried to learn how to ride a motorcycle in high school. it was this random obsession he got for no reason where he just really wanted one, but he always panicked whenever he got the chance to try one out. never even got his permit because he was so scared.

stan had a lot of pent-up anger as a kid that he never even recognized as anger until he got older. because of that he often broke his toys on accident because something wasn’t working correctly, and sometimes he’d snap at teachers on accident. obv he still had a problem with it but at least now he knows what’s going on and can at least try to work on dealing with it.

betty used to read to stan at night when he was really young. they didn’t have many books around so it was just stan listening to her read the same four dr. seuss books over and over. he didn’t mind though.

stan’s always loved writing and a good chunk of his free time was writing little short stories. he took a creative writing class in high school and he almost immediately became the teacher’s pet.

stan was a pretty lonely socially inept kid and i like to think growing up he tried getting a lot of his ‘advice’ on how to interact with others through television. one time he tried to get a girl’s attention by doing the ‘throwing pebbles at their window’ trope, but he fucked up and got too big a stone and threw it too hard, and just shattered this poor girl’s window. and stan spent the rest of the night crying in his room before caving and turning himself in.

i can see him being really into superheroes when he was younger. just him bounding around the house with a blanket for a cape, acting out random scenes he read out of the latest issue he bought.

stan was obv a dog kid. he’d often find himself going to the adoption shelter near his house just to see the dogs there whenever he was feeling down. and his fave breeds were golden retrievers, pit bulls, and shelties.

god i have tons more for all of them but i’m gonna stop because this is already long enough as it is.

#i’m so sorry i didn’t mean for it to get this long djbfdjdkdkd #i'm tired too so i'm pretty sure a lot of this is Worded Weird and Awkwardly and i won't find out until tomorrow #anon #asks #long #american dad

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stenbrozier · 5 years

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SFW Alphabet (Barry Berkman x Reader)

Warnings: swearing, mentions of anxiety and PTSD

A is for Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

- Barry wasn’t very big on showing affection until he realized how much you loved it. You loved when his arms were wrapped around you or when his hand was resting idle on your thigh. You used to simply ask him, not wanting to push his boundaries, but he eventually realized how much you asked and how much you craved to have him touching you in some way. When he started doing it himself, it caught you off guard, but you also appreciated how he paid attention to when you asked and kept that knowledge in the back of his head. Other than simple little touches, Barry is very hesitant on affection because he doesn’t like to push boundaries, but he soon notices that you grow increasingly more happy when he shows you affection. He makes it a point to be near you or touching you at all times.

B is for Best Friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

- Your relationship started out as a friendship. He was new in the acting class, so you and Ryan brought it upon yourselves to be nice to him and to show him that you were all really close. But when Ryan was shot, it was up to you and only you to keep that reputation up with Barry. You talked to him every class and made him feel like he mattered and that he was supposed to be there. As a friend, he would always bring your favorite snacks to class so that you’d have them and make sure that you had everything you needed. He just wanted to take care of you because he never felt like he could take care of someone before you guys became friends. Barry was also just an amazing person to rant to because he listened and knew how to comfort you and make you feel as if what you said mattered.

C is for Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

- Cuddling was very foreign to Barry, so there wasn’t any cuddling until a few months into the relationship. He liked touching you and assured you it was okay that you would touch him a little as well, but you still didn’t feel like he would be totally okay with you holding him. It wasn’t until he slept over one time and he curled up behind you and wrapped his arms around you that you knew that he was okay with it. Tbh, cuddling is probably Barry’s favorite thing because he just loves being so close to you and knowing that he’s keeping you safe. It also makes him feel safe because he can escape from the world a little and just remind himself that you are going to be there no matter what, even after he kills someone.

D is for Domestic (Do you they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

- The thought of settling down is so appealing yet so horrifying for Barry. He knows he wants to live his life with you, but he doesn’t know if he wants to buy and house and start a family and make any bigger commitments than just loving you and only you. Marriage is scary to him and so is pretty much everything outside of living in a small apartment with you and your cat. However, if you guys do end up getting that big house you’ve always wanted, you know that he’ll do an amazing job cleaning it. He fucking cleans up blood and stuff for a living so cleaning the apartment comes so naturally to him. You could literally be gone for an hour and the entire living room and kitchen would be vacuumed and dusted. More often than not, you’d find him in the bathroom singing off-key to some random album from the 90s and cleaning the bathtub.

E is for Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

- Barry would most likely have to break up with you because the Chechens threatened using you against him the next time he did a job wrong. He’d tell you the truth, well somewhat, and explain that he just needed to leave to “keep you safe.” You didn’t know what that meant so you’d argue and fight and cry until all of his stuff was packed and he’d be out. He call you maybe a week after and really tell you the truth, the hitman gigs, the Chechens, everything. It gave you closure and it made the breakup a bit more bearable, but you still missed him and loved him and couldn’t be with him. You understood but hated that you couldn’t have him.

F is for Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

- Marriage was very stupid to Barry. He honestly didn’t believe in it and you didn’t care much about a big wedding because in the end it didn’t matter. You both just wanted each other, and you got that. Barry just kinda referred to you as his wife after a few years, not really having much care if someone called him out on it or not. You also referred to him as your husband, so you didn’t feel the need to go all out and get rings to signify that you guys loved each other because you already knew that.

G is for Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

- Barry is a B I G softie when it comes to you. Once you and him are alone in your apartment, he gives you the most gentle touches and softest kisses and just becomes the biggest teddy bear. Everything he does is gentle, whether he’s dragging his hand up and down your arm or tapping lightly on your knee. Emotionally, however, he’s very harsh and closed off. He doesn’t like telling you how he feels, nor does he like you prying him on how he feels. So, you just cuddle and melt into each other and you know that he’ll just start spewing his emotions at some point. You don’t push, but you do remind him that he is loved and anything he says will not be judged. You know what he does, and he doesn’t have to be afraid of going too far when talking about his job.

H is for Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

- Barry had never been given a proper hug until he met you. Hugs weren’t that important to him either, but once you truly hugged him for the first time, he was hooked. Your small frame against his large one brought him so much comfort it was ridiculous. Hugs were the only thing that he would really execute anywhere, even in public and that’s a big step for him. Barry loves hugs because they make him feel safe and he likes how you nuzzle into his chest or neck and just take in all of his warmth. More often than not, you smile against him and he feels it, making his heart beat clear out of his chest. His big arms would wrap around your waist and yours would go around his neck. He was also known to pick you up and snuggle into your neck at times, causing you to blush and laugh as he spun you.

I is for I Love You (How fast do they say the L-word?)

- We all know Barry wouldn’t say it unless you said it first, not wanting to push boundaries, but he shows it right from the start. He pays attention to little things you say like what your favorite snack is or what your favorite color is and just brings it up every now and then. Having a movie night? Barry doesn’t even need to ask you what snacks you want because you’ve already told you all of his favorites. Christmas shopping? He got you some things that reminded him of you in your favorite color. You said it a few months in, and since then, he’s been saying it every five minutes because that’s how in love with you he is. Though he’s now officially saying ‘I love you,’ Barry still pays attention and makes it a point to get you everything you love all of the time.

J is for Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

- Jealous!Barry is very rare. You guys don’t really go to bars too often or out to dinner too much, but when you do, either the waiter or a random guy comes up and tries to get you to go home with him. Barry gets SO heated. He instantly is at your side, grabbing onto your waist with one hand and gripping your thigh in the other. He starts casually kissing your cheek and trying to get all of your attention. If none of that gets the guy away from you, he threatens to “rip him limb from limb,” but Barry doesn’t say it to the guy’s face. He says it in your ear so you know that you need to shut this guy down or else it’ll be the end of him. Barry isn’t joking when he says that either; he will actually fucking kill someone for you.

K is for Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they liked to be kissed?)

- Barry is a very gentle kisser. It’s mostly because he’s very tentative of kissing and doesn’t really do it much outside of the apartment, but he’s starting to warm up to the idea that he can kiss you anywhere. His lips are usually soft and he usually tells you before he kisses you that he is kissing you, giving you the chance to decline (as if you would.) He loves to kiss your hands because it’s so innocent and doesn’t really give away that you guys are together. It also just feels so much more intimate to him and he craves that feeling of intimacy with you. Barry loves to be kissed on his shoulders. You’re just tall enough to where you can reach his shoulders for kisses without him leaning down and he loves it. You’ve done it so many times that he’s used to the familiarity and it never fails to make him feel like the only man in the world.

L is for Little Ones (How are they around children?)

- Barry is a nervous wreck around kids. He likes older kids, older being 7 and up, but he’s still not confident with babies or toddler aged kids. You’ve brought him to holiday dinners with your family and even though he can do so well with the older kids and hold good conversations with them, he’s so tentative to hold your cousin’s new baby. Barry doesn’t wanna make a mistake, and you understand that. You guys have talked about kids before but aren’t really sure because of his crippling anxieties about it, and you completely respect that. You always remind him that even if you don’t have kids of your own, adopting older kids is an option and he just smiles because of how understanding you are. He knows how much you want your own kids, but you are willing to give up on that dream just so that you and him can raise a family together.

M is for Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

- Mornings with Barry are literally filled with cuddling and dozing in and out of sleep. His arms wrapped around you, your hair all of his face and tickling his neck, and let’s not forget the soft little snores that fill your ears. You always wake up first but aren’t given the option to escape so you just lay on him and trace little circles into his arms or his chest until his eyes flutter open and he starts giving you kisses all of your head. He holds you against him tigther, wanting you to stay longer. You love that you get this time with him every morning. Your job doesn’t require you to come in until about noon, and Barry’s job is always almost a night shift type thing, so mornings are the only time you and him can really cling to one another and relish in the face that you have each other.

N is for Night (How are nights spent with them?)

- More often than not, you work until about 8pm and Barry doesn’t get home until 2-3am, but that doesn’t stop him from coming to snuggle you the moment he’s cleaned up and in comfy pjs. However, on the rare occasion you both have a night off, you’ll snuggle in bed and watch movies on Netflix, probably stupid throw away movies that you can tal or make out during. He loves just being with you and having the opportunity to kiss you and not being in fear of someone seeing and coming after you or being able to be lovey, clingy Barry. Barry doesn’t get a lot of opportunities to be needy and he likes just having all of your attention, especially at night. It makes him feel special. Getting off of work and getting attention from the one he loves most? Sign him up.

O is for Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait awhile to reveal things slowly?)

- Barry doesn’t keep secrets from you. The only secret he’s ever kept from you was the fact that he was a hitman, and that was for your own safety. Barry has been completely transparent about everything. From his PTSD and anxiety, to him being a big softie he exposed everything to you as soon as you guys became official. He warned you about his outbursts and how he can close off immediately and you appreciated that. You were the exact same way, letting him build up his trust for you as soon as you could, knowing it would be easy on his anxiety to know everything. You were a bit angry at the fact that he didn’t tell you that he was a hitman, but once he explained why with fully transparency, you weren’t as mad. You understood his need and want to protect from the men he worked for and you appreciated that he wanted to keep you safe, even if it meant lying to you about a pretty big thing.

P is for Patience (How easily angered are they?)

- Truly, it depends on the kind of day Barry’s been having. You can usually tell when he’s angry and try your best to stay out of his way because he does have a tendency to throw things or punch pillows and you don’t want to get hurt. If you do get in his way when he’s angry, he doesn’t yell at you. He just starts ranting and screaming and pounding his fists on the granite counter in your kitchen. Barry doesn’t get mad at you, he just directs his anger into rants to you and just yells in your face about some guy who pissed him off at the grocery store. The only time he was ever mad at you was when you blew him off to hang out with Sally, and even then, he was more angry at himself for feeling the slightest bit of rage at you wanting to be there for you friend who was hurting.

Q is for Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

- Barry remembers everything. He knows your favorite drink, your favorite snacks, your favorite color, what your first pet’s name was and more. Barry just loves hearing about you and wants to absorb up as much of that information as he can to use at a later date. You mention you wanna try that new Italian restaurant that’s opening in a year? He’ll look up when it opens and will be the first to make a reservation. You once said that you liked a very specific type of perfume and couldn’t find it anywhere so Barry went to about 15 stores looking for it just so you’d smile, and this was about two months after you mentioned it because he thought of it for a split second. He’s so attentive that it’s crazy, but it makes you smile when he does cute little things that you mentioned you liked or when he gets you your favorite takeout.

R is for Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

- His favorite moment was the first time you and him did a scene in your acting class. Sally was home sick, so you filled in for her, and Barry thought you guys had such great chemistry onstage. It was a love confession scene from some random movie, and Barry basically just spoke to you, not embellishing the words and could also tell that you were doing the same. It was also the day that you asked him out to dinner for the first time, so that’s probably why he loves that moment the most. He loved that he was able to share his emotions with you the only way he really knew how and you were grateful that he was so easy to work with.

S is for Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

- Barry is very protective of you, especially when you guys go out after acting class with everyone else. He’s seen so many people in his life get hurt and he doesn’t want it to happen to you. Also, he doesn’t want the Chechens using you against him and holding you hostage until he got a job done. Barry has to keep an eye on you at all times, and it really shows when you go to bars. If you need to go to the bathroom, Barry is right behind you following you and making sure you stay safe and aren’t taken. It’s the same when you go to get a drink. He knows he doesn’t need to do it, but it’s his way of knowing that you’re safe and it doesn’t worry him. Barry is a big worrier. You’re protective of him as well, but only to an extent. You know he can take care of himself so that’s not an issue, but he’s oblivious to when people flirt with him. You make sure he’s by your side the whole time and try to make it obvious he’s yours.

T is for Try (How much effort would they put into anniversaries, gifts, dates, everyday tasks?)

- Barry does the absolute most for the anniversaries. He’ll take you to the fanciest restaurants and get you the nicest gifts, even if it just something that has sentimental value. For you one year, he got you a small stuffed elephant, simply to remind you of the most hilarious inside joke that you guys had ever made. To him, whenever he’s with you, he has to put in a shit ton of effort. When he makes dinner, he makes sure that you get the best experience. Like he’ll make such an extravagant meal on a normal fucking Tuesday. He just wants you to be reminded everyday that he loves you and will do the absolute most for you.

U is for Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?

- He doesn’t tell your where he’s at unless you call him, and he sometimes doesn’t even pick up his phone. Barry has gone MIA for days and it makes you nervous every time. You call Fuches, you call Gene, and you even call Sally. He usually responds to you after like four days, but he knows in for a hell of a time when he comes home. Usually, he’s out doing job after job and not paying much mind because he’s so used to doing everything by himself without someone caring too much. Barry knows that he has to realize that you’re there and care so he has gotten better at keeping you updated even it’s just a simple ‘I love you and I’m safe’ at 2am. It pisses you off, but your heart flutters whenever he texts you and you like being able to make sure he’s safe.

V is for Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

- The only time Barry gives a shit about how he looks is when he takes you out. He usually only wears jeans and a tee shirt, but if he’s taking you somewhere fancy he’ll step it up and put on a nice collared shirt and some dress pants. He also tends to want to dress up a little for acting class, just to make a good impression. He’s more concerned with your wellbeing and that you have all of the stuff you need than he is with his own clothes or face and hair products, not that he has much anyway.

W is for Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

- Oh hell yeah. Barry didn’t feel as if he had a purpose until he met you and he knows that he’s go right back to that depressed feeling of you guys were to ever break up. Everything he does is for you and if he were to have that taken from him, he’s have no reason to live. Barry and you have gotten into fights and that has to lead to him crashing with Fuches for the night, and even in that short amount of time, he feels so empty and just unwanted. He needs you to survive at this point.

X is for Xtra (A random head canon for them)

~ Trigger warning for mention of dead animals!! ~

- When you guys were deciding if you wanted an animal or not, you said you really wanted a dog and he got so nervous. When you ultimately decided on a cat, you cautiously brought up the fact that he didn’t want a dog and he explained to you why. During his time in the marines, he saw a lot of the war dogs that they had brought over get shot or blown up. Barry would never be able to get their yelps of pain out of his head or even how they looked, so he just swore off dogs for the rest of his life.

Y is for Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

- In general, Barry doesn’t really like people who are too conceited. He feels like you need to be a little bit humble in order to be a respectable person. Every conceited person he’s met has treated him horrible because they thought they were at a higher rank in life than he was. In a relationship, Barry doesn’t want to be with someone who doesn’t understand his PTSD, or just simply disregards it. He needs to feel comfortable. That’s why he loves you. When ever you do something new, you always ask if he’s okay with it. You even do that when you guys are simply just going out to eat. Who knows if his anxiety was high that day or not; you know he wouldn’t want to go to dinner if he’s already close to a panic attack.

Z is for Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?)

- Barry has this entire nightly routine, which ultimately takes him about 20 minutes to complete. It aggravates you to no end because you just want to get in bed and cuddle, but you also know that if it’s interrupted or he doesn’t follow through with it fully, he’ll be anxious about it and want to go and start it all over again; he also does this routine whenever he comes home from a hit, too, making sleeping a little difficult with him slamming shit around in the bathroom. But once he’s done it all, he snuggles up next to you. Barry also has to sleep on the right side of the bed; he has no idea why, he just feels safest when you’re against the wall and he’s protecting you from anything that could hurt you.

#barry berkman x reader #barry block x reader #barry berkman #barry block #bill hader #barry hbo #masterlist

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nightingale-sang · 4 years

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20 Questions

I was tagged by @excusemebutiquit ! I don’t know if I have ever done one of these on tumblr, so I am v excited about this! Rules: Answer 20 questions, then tag 20 bloggers you want to get to know better.

Name: Larkin

Nicknames: Lark, Bird, Songbird, and to one weird, but lovely friend, Demon

Height: 5′7″ish? Sometimes 5′6″, sometimes 5′8″. 6 feet tall in my favorite heels.

Languages: Just English. I took some French in high school, and then took it in college and failed the same class three times.

Nationality: American. Oof.

Favorite season: Spring! I wanna be warm after all the gross winter time!

Favorite flower: Sunflowers, but I also have an affinity for bluebells and violets

Favorite scent: Probably vanilla, or maybe cinnamon

Favorite color: I like yellow, purple, and pink!

Favorite animal: Cats <3

Favorite fictional characters: Wow okay, let’s just go with characters from my two current hyperfixations, otherwise we would be here all day. Jon, Martin, Melanie, Basira, Georgie, Jane Prentiss, and Nikola Orsinov from The Magnus Archives. Taako, Lup, Barry, Angus, and Kravitz from The Adventure Zone.

Coffee, tea, or hot chocolate: All of the above?

Average sleep hours: Yikes, I’ve been trying to get 8 hours, but I usually get closer to 6 or 7.

Dog or cat person: Cats!

Number of blankets you sleep with: One very big and warm one

Dream trip: I would love to go back to Disney with my friends tbh, I miss it there a lot. I also really want to bring all my close friends from around the country all to one place for like a week <3

Blog established: I don’t remember, maybe 2016?

Number of followers: 173. Which is honestly wild idk what anyone follows me for lol

Random fact: I’m a cosplayer? I guess that’s a good fact.

I’m tagging @creative--crisis and anyone else who wants to do it!

#tagged #thanks Mary!#Also Marilyn is a nickname even though it is longer than your name

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zombiesbecrazy · 5 years

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like a stone comes down

Summary: Wally didn’t know what he had been expecting Sanctuary to be like, but as soon as he saw it, he immediately knew that this wasn’t it.

(loosely connected to THIS, but can definitely be read alone)

AO3

Note: This takes place at Sanctuary, before the events of Heroes in Crisis. I was attempting to bridge the gap between what we saw when Wally left in Flash 51 and what happens in HiC. I may not have succeeded, but I gave it a shot. I'm not sure if this needs a trigger warning or not, but Wally mentions that he thinks he's both crazy and broken in this several times. Mental illness or needing help doesn't mean you are either of those things - please take care of yourself and don't be afraid to ask for help if you are struggling.

Wally didn’t know what he had been expecting Sanctuary to be like, but as soon as he saw it, he immediately knew that this wasn’t it. A farmhouse in the middle of a field in the middle of nowhere made sense from a logistical standpoint, he guessed, but it just looked so innocuous and domestic that this had to be some sort of elaborate joke. Something that Wonder Woman and Superman were playing at, a weird play on the phrase about putting Wally out to pasture or taking him to farm like an old dog because he had finally snapped.

Clark was talking as they walked through the tall grass on the approach to the house and Wally was sure that it was important but he couldn’t focus on the words, instead just looking around and tried to process everything that was happening. Yes, he had agreed to come here and he had admitted that he needed help to deal with everything that had happened to him ever since getting trapped in the Speed Force, but now that he was here he wasn’t so sure that this was the right way to go about it. Maybe he should have stayed home where he could see Iris and Barry regularly and gone to some sort of more traditional therapy because separating himself for the little family that he had left didn’t sit right in his gut. With each step closer, the more he doubted the decision. He didn’t say anything though; they would just tell him that he was nervous and everything would be fine. He was nervous, he couldn’t deny that, but something about this entire place seemed off.

It just didn’t make any sense. If this had been here all this time, why hadn’t he ever heard of it before? Why hadn’t they brought him here when he had first come out of the Speed Force for a psych evaluation or something? Surely they would have talked to him about it sooner if this had been an option? Why wasn’t this the place that Donna had been brought after the whole Troia fiasco when the League had shut down the Titans instead of under lock and key in the Watchtower? It didn’t add up.

There was a pit in Wally’s stomach that was digging deeper with every second that passed, but it vanished when he saw a familiar figure outside the house, setting his mind at ease. Roy was sitting on the porch in a comfortable looking chair with his feet kicked up on the railing and a book in his lap, he looked up and broke into a wide smile as Wally climbed up the stairs, dropping his duffel bag at his feet as Clark and Diana entered the house. “Well look what the cat dragged in.” Roy drawled out lazily in a terribly fake southern accent, tipping his cap at him. The last time he had seen Roy he had looked terrible, so being able to see him here like this, relaxed and what looked like at least a solid week of sleep until his belt, was encouraging at the least. “What are you doing here, West?” “Same as you, I guess.” Roy hummed and stretched his arms up behind his head and nodded at the chair beside him, inviting Wally to join him. “Didn’t know that you were on a wagon that you could fall off of.” “Well, not that specifically.” Wally was pretty sure that he was supposed to be following Clark and Diana into the house and get settled or join in on a sharing circle or do some arts and crafts or something else like that, but it felt better out here with Roy. The porch was a good halfway between the outside world that he couldn’t handle right now and the unknown that he was trying to avoid inside. “I’m broken, Roy. I kept running but it just finally caught up with me, I guess.” “Broken is something I understand. Welcome to the party. It’s pretty lame.” Wally chuckled and kicked his feet up on the rail to mirror Roy’s. “So, what’s this place like?” “It’s alright.” Roy closed his book, running his hands over the back cover. “There’s a lot of alien VR simulation tech focused on working through your issues. It lets you confront things or people that you wouldn’t have a chance to do in the real world, so there’s that.” “And how’s that working out for you so far?” “Undecided. I’ll keep you posted.” Roy shrugged, before he tilted his head in the direction of the door, where Clark and Diana were certainly waiting for him. “Ready to get started?” Wally looked out towards the fields, in the general direction of Keystone, where he knew Linda was, where his kids would have been in another timeline. The sun was setting, casting pink and purple streaks across the sky. “Five more minutes.” Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad here.

***

Wally hated Sanctuary.

He hated the chambers, he hated the mask, and he hated the so-called therapy. Despite all the other people there, it just made him feel more ashamed and alone than he had been before, and as strange as it sounded, he was starting to doubt if any of it was real at all. In a world with aliens, metas and interdimensional travel, it wasn’t so far out there, was it? To think that this place was all made up just for him? Why wouldn’t it be? If this was a real place, he had been in the hero game since he was a kid so he would have heard about it by now, probably would have even been he before. People would talk about Sanctuary, about the help that they had gotten, the resources available to them when they needed them. Hell, if it were real they would have mandatory sessions with all the League associated members. Teen Titans would have a therapist assigned full time. If this place were real, things like that would be implemented across the board and not as a last ditch attempt to fix the crazy before it went over to the dark side or broke the universe.

If everyone was as broken as he was, they should be screaming it from the rooftops, not hiding away behind closed doors. Everyone should know so they could all get help for it. No, the more he thought about it, the more he was starting to convince himself that he was the only one like this, he was the only one from a fractured piece of a forgotten timeline and they had clearly put him here because they couldn’t think of anywhere better to put him until they figured out a way to fix him. The thing that he kept tripping over about his theory was that there were other people, people he had known for years, being treated for their own inner demons, but there could be explanations around that. They could be here just pretending to need help so Wally felt like he wasn’t the only crazy person. They were all people who led double lives professionally, they could act in a charade meant to make Wally feel at ease. Or maybe they weren’t really here at all. Maybe Wally was just in a virtual reality the whole time, not just when he went into the chamber and put the mask on, with his own mind directing the fantasy. That was the more likely scenario. The thing that confused him about either of those theories was Roy, because despite their occasional water and oil dynamic, he knew Roy wasn’t cruel; he wouldn’t fake that sort of thing. That would mean that Roy had to be a VR construct that his own brain had made up to keep him company in his misery here. It made more sense that it was Roy instead of Dick or Barry to be here; Roy had been to rehab before, it wasn’t a far reach for Wally to make up that he could be here again. He was one of his oldest friends, and Wally had gotten to the point where he had no idea what if he was even here or not and that was terrifying to think of. If the Roy who was sitting on the other side of the table right now, ranting about spoiled milk at this weird superhero therapy vacation house, even existed or if he was really home in Star City or running around elsewhere doing what he did and this was something of Wally’s own creation. If Wally wasn’t crazy before, he was quickly driving himself here. “So, I know what I’m doing here.” Roy’s voice caught Wally’s attention, pulling him away from his own spiraling thoughts. Roy was sipping his coffee, tapping his fork against the table, without seeming to have a care in the world. “What I don’t know is what you are doing here. It’s been a week and I’ve barely seen you. You keep hiding in your room. I know we’re in rehab but you look terrible, man.” He put his cup on the table and rested his elbows against it, looking at Wally critically, examining the pallor of his skin and the bags under his eyes. Wally knew that he looked exhausted but he wasn’t able to sleep here, all alone in the silence. “You might even look worse than you did when you first rolled up.” It sounded like the type of thing Roy would say. It also sounded like the type of thing that a VR trying to give him therapy while pretending to be Roy would also say, especially if it was pulling from Wally’s own thoughts. “I…” Wally frowned, crossed his arms in front of him and tried to sort out his thoughts. Roy was right; he had been avoiding him, but even that had started before he had started down the path of thinking this entire place was made up. “It has to do with the other timeline. I remembered something and I’m not handling it well.” “You can talk to me, Wally. Sharing is caring or so the robot people tell me.” As much as he wanted to talk to someone beyond himself that could possibly understand, who knew about Linda and the other timeline, he couldn’t bring himself tell Roy about Jai and Irey. It would start with them but Wally knew that it would spiral fast and deep into so much more than that. He tells Roy about his kids and then Roy would hug him fiercely, because despite his tough guy image Roy was marshmallow and a hugger at the core, and that would make it just that much worse. Hugging would mean that Roy would touch him and then he could remember Lian, and as much as he wanted to give Roy those memories, those amazing happy memories of what a good father he was to such a precious little girl, Wally couldn’t do it because then Roy would remember what had happened to her. He couldn’t give him the good without giving him the terrible memory that she was not only lost like his kids were, but gone. He couldn’t pick and choose. Roy would get all or nothing and Wally didn’t want to be the one to both give and take her away. Sharing was all well and good but it would just make Roy worse and not make Wally’s suffering any less so if he had to choose between them, he was just going to keep his turmoil to himself. In the off chance that this was all real and this was actually Roy, the Roy who Wally had watched suffer so much in the other timeline, and then again in this one, he couldn’t tell him. He couldn’t be the person who doubled that pain if he didn’t have to. “I can’t, Roy. Not-” Wally looked away from Roy and bit his lip before shaking his head slowly. He could shoulder this burden on his own. He didn’t need to add more onto Roy. He couldn’t drag him into this specific hell with him. “Not with you.” He could feel Roy staring at him, clearly wanting to push the matter but in the end just stood up, chair scraping against the tile, and stormed out the kitchen door into the fields outside, leaving Wally alone at the table with his head in his hands. *** Six days later Wally was lying on his bed in the dark, staring up at the ceiling and trying his best to think about nothing and failing miserably at it. He hadn’t left his room in days, barely left his bed even though he didn’t sleep. He had nightmares when he was both asleep and awake and he had gotten to the point where he wasn’t even sure which was which anymore. It didn’t help that he kept insisting of replaying them in his therapy sessions either, just as a way to punish himself. Over and over again he saw his family melt away into the nothing that the Speed Force had left behind, not being able to reach them no matter how fast he went, only able to hear their cries as they slipped away, lost in the abyss. Other times he’d use the sessions to return to his home from before, not to say goodbye which he knew he should be doing, but to stay just a little while longer instead. To tickle Jai until he squealed. To push Irey on the swings. To watch the sunset with Linda. It was a different kind of torture, but at least that one he could enjoy while it lasted and then just crumble again in his room after it ended. He still didn’t know for sure if this place was real, whether he was alone or not, but he was beginning to be more certain that it was all made up. He couldn’t help but think that the solution to someone feeling isolated in the world was to put them in an even more isolating place alone with his own thoughts was a terrible idea. The only way it made sense was if this was all something that was made up for him because if he were truly at a therapy home for superheroes someone would have intervened by now, would have seen him spinning further and stepped in with a different treatment method. The absolute worst part was that if it wasn’t real it meant he was trapped in a simulation, unable to get out, and it was frighteningly similar to being stuck in the Speed Force, running and running and unable to escape. When he thought about it that way, he could feel the pressure and the energy building up inside him and it was getting harder and harder to push it back down and keep it in check. It was making him claustrophobic in his own skin and there wasn’t a cure for that because he couldn’t run away from himself. Whatever all this was, real or not, it wasn’t working. Sanctuary wasn’t working. Wally wasn’t working. Maybe he was never going to work right again and this is just what broken beyond repair felt like. There was a soft knock at the door and Wally called for them to come in without thinking. He didn’t turn his head to see who it was. There was only one person in the house that would be coming to see him, either if this was a reality or just a simulation. “Shove over.” Wally moved closer to the wall and felt Roy lay down on the bed beside him, mattress sinking down beneath their combined weight. It was comforting, having Roy beside him like this. They had done it as kids sometimes, late at night in the Tower when neither of them wanted to go home and had made up reasons to stay instead. They would go to bed in their separate rooms, but inevitably would decide that they didn’t want to be alone, early in the beginning deciding that unlocked doors were an open invitation between the five of them. They were friends, but more than that, they were each others first chosen family; the ones they went to when their homes had fallen apart. This certainly applied under that category. God, he was lonely. He was going to pretend that Roy was real right now with everything he had just to have a moment of sanity, just something, anything, to hold on to. Minutes passed without either of them saying anything before Roy reached down and grabbed Wally’s hand, squeezing it tight and at the touch, Wally’s silent tears started to fall in the dark; he felt them streaming back into his hair and onto his pillow. Just having someone here with him in his room, touching him, real or not, was enough to make him fall apart. “It’s your kids,” Roy whispered into the darkness. “What?” Wally tried to pull his hand away, to break the connection before Roy could see anything that he shouldn’t. Wally had no idea how he could possibly know about his kids. Unless Roy was fake. Roy’s hand tightened, not giving Wally the option of getting away without phasing through him. “The thing you aren’t dealing with well. Why you’re here.” He sighed, deep in his chest, steadying his thoughts. “Before. In the other timeline. I think I remember you having kids. I was waiting for you to say something but you clearly aren’t going to on your own.” Wally nodded. It was small, but enough for Roy to feel it on the shared pillow because he did the same. “I think I had one too?” He phrased it as a question, but Wally could hear the crack in his words, and knew that Roy knew. The pain that Wally had been trying to avoid Roy having to know, it was all there in the fumbled phrase. “Roy, I shouldn’t…” “She died. I couldn’t save her.” Wally could see the shadow of Roy’s free arm in the dark coming up to his face, heard the sound of his shirt sleeve rubbing against his face. “Yeah.” There was nothing else that Wally could say about that. “How long have you remembered?” “Not long,” said Roy. “I slept with Cheshire after the Titans broke up.” “Yeah, that’s how it happened.” “No, I mean... one night I came across you upset in the Tower and you zapped me and-” Shit. Wally was beginning to remember the night he had broken into the locked down Tower with a bottle of jet fuel and tried to drink away his memories of the other timeline. He vaguely recalled Roy being there now but he hadn’t known he transferred any timeline knowledge that night. “I was already struggling with it, but then I slept with Jade and more started coming back.” There was a sniff and he squeezed Roy’s hand tight. “I remember more when I’m using. I remember Lian when I’m high.” Roy trailed off until he was whispering the last part. “I can get clean on my own. I’ve done it before. I’m here so that I can become a person that one day will be deserving of having someone like her again.” He had seen Roy slipping, but hadn’t known the reason why. He had been doing so well and then Wally had made it all crash down around him and he hadn’t even known he had caused it. “Fuck. I’m so sorry.” “Not your fault.” Roy mumbled. “It’s nice, mostly. She was so sweet and good. I can feel… I loved her so much, Wally.” “I know. You were a great dad.” “So were you.” They lay there side by side in a bed that wasn’t quite big enough for the two of them, until Roy started to laugh, slow at first, but it quickly escalated into something more hysterical. “We’re not okay, are we?” The laughter was inappropriate, but contagious and both of them ended up giggling uncontrollably like little kids in the dark until Wally was hiccuping. “Not even a little bit.” And they weren’t because Wally’s brain had made up a Roy that as just as broken as he was. Wally felt alone and his delusion had created a solution and gave him an ally. Laughter petered out on both sides and fell into a careful calm, the type that reminded Wally of right before a tornado hit, when everything is still but you know that something could strike at any moment, right when you let your guard down. “This place sucks,” said Roy eventually. “Yeah. I think it’s making me worse. It’s messing with my head.” Wally hesitated, but then said the thing out loud that he had been thinking the entire time, the thing that was pushing back at him at every turn. “Are you real?” “What do you mean?” Roy rolled onto his side, trying to look at Wally better despite the darkness of the room. “Of course I’m real.”

Wally turned his head and he could see the outline of Roy’s features, familiar and trusted and probably all made up in his head. “That’s just what something someone who isn’t real would say.” When he said it outloud he knew it sounded crazy, but he couldn’t shake the thought that he was the only one who was fractured and unfixable.

“I can’t argue that kind of logic. What could I say to convince you I’m real?”

“I’m not sure that you can.” There wasn’t anything that Wally could think of to fix the problem because anything that he could potentially say would to prove it would be something that Wally already knew and therefore be able to infuse into his delusion. He wanted Roy to be real so badly, but if he was that meant he was just as broken as Wally was, and he didn’t want that either. He just ended up shrugging because he didn’t have an answer.

“Maybe it doesn’t matter if I’m real or not. We’re all alone, Wally. All the time.” Roy rolled back onto his back and rested his free arm under his head, like he was staring up at the stars instead of just the vague darkness of Wally’s ceiling, before nudging him with he foot. “At least right now we’re alone together. I don’t think that’s so bad.” It was a nice thought, but didn’t mean anything if everything was made up and Roy wasn’t real; if he wasn’t real then they weren’t alone together. Roy said it didn’t matter. Maybe that was his subconscious trying to finally break through and tell him that he was right, that this was all fabricated just for him. That he really was all alone. It wasn’t real. It just couldn’t be. It was then that Wally knew for sure that he was just in this by himself, wasting away to nothing.

#whumptober2019 #no.30 #wally west #roy harper #heroes in crisis #tw: mental health #maybe?

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