#and amplifiers that don't work

[tittyinfinity]

Jfc I said something about having a guitar that looks like the one from Wayne's World and I have 2 dudebros jumping at me to say "well ACTUALLY if you REALLY had that guitar and actually played it then you would know more about it" like bro I did not say I was good at the guitar I just said I have one

[kodii-ak]

Pain

A comic about my chronic pain experience.

[minevn]

Here we go again talking about "Mine" and explaining my absence. For the past month or two I've been questioning myself if I want to put Mine on a hiatus(Which I didn't feel was surprising considering that I've vented about the game so much on this blog, I'm sorry for that). I wouldn't be getting rid of it and I would be heading back to it eventually, but I just needed to step away and really think about what I wanted to do. At this point in time I'm still questioning what I want to do. Long story short Mine won't be getting released any time soon and it needs a lot of work to be done on it, in every way.

I think my biggest issue was rushing into this project. I was so SO excited to just get my story out and talk about my characters and ideas, but I had almost nothing set in stone or planned out. Some of my favorite story aspects I created after I made this blog, granted it wasn't a obvious change since it had to do with spoilers, and story aspect kind of just fit together to make a bigger plot twist. I still love what I've created thus far, but it needs so much work, and it feels weird and off to have changes just happen with the characters and story.

I was getting bored of certain characters and the art style. I won't be getting rid of any characters because even the ones who don't seem that important to the overall plot are still important, but I'll be changing/upgrading character designs. And especially changing the art style. I was really disliking my style for Mine and even more so after the Halloween drawing. I did practice around a bit and I found a style I like, but it's still not set in stone.

This is kind of what I was thinking. The eyes have a more defined shape, the nose is different, the hair is more detailed. I've also been wanted to mess around with coloring and shading. And once again this style is not set in stone, but this is what I'm leaning towards as of now. I want the game to have an anime style for reasons, but I did also try a style that's more mine I guess? Like I drew Yani in the style I draw in the most, the style that's most consistent to me. I mainly did this because one my bestfriends has been helping me sort out my own feelings and she said to at least try a more cartoon style even if the anime style is what I'm aiming for in the end.

I obviously I do like the style, but it's just not what I'm going for, so I was going to try drawing different eyes styles and then I would build a face to match that.

I did like these, but it didn't inspire me and I didn't want these for Mine. So this is what I've been working on for now, I'm trying t build my interest in this story again. I know I've talked about it before, but Yani and Jun's designs are the ones I'm most proud about(maybe Aki as well, if I change anything it wouldn't be too extreme), but the other characters will be getting an upgrade, in design, story, and personality.

Minato in particular. I feel so bad because as much as I like Minato, he feels so plain to me. Like I don't have fun writing him or drawing him. There are things I do really enjoy about him, like his hair style, and his yellow eyes. But I'm bored with pretty much everything else about him, and that's not a good sign, he's the first route, the first character to be released. he needs something to draw in the player, but I don't feel like he has that. I don't know where to really go with him though. I think the fact that he's the least yandere is charming and important, like to lure the player into a false sense of security, almost as if they were just playing a normal visual novel/dating sim with routes, and then the creepy stuff starts mainly happening with the other routes, but obviously I need something to make his route exciting.

In the meantime asks will most likely not be answered until I've figured the characters out more. When I figure out the characters as well, I want to go back and slowly work on updating previous asks to fit the new personality and stories. I'll probably make a poll on how to go about that just in case people want the old answered asks or something. Maybe I could just do something like-

Old: bhjdhsvjagjhasgd

New: VHJDhfdjgshdf

I don't know as of now. I also want to go back and update my 100 followers event drawings, and obviously finish that. Which by the way I am so sorry to everyone who sent in requests, for that event and just in general. Me struggling with Mine's art style has been a thing, even with the refs, there were some refs that I just hated how they turned out(cough cough Hoshi). I also have been practicing with more cartoon(?) styles, so working on a game with an anime style reminds me of my past styles, which I hated because I got those feeling of hating my style or falling behind my peers who were finding their style. I'm a lot better with it now, but I felt like I was falling back into old habits/styles, and it was upsetting.

While I was planning my hiatus, I kept thinking about some of my other game ideas because if I was going to go on hiatus I would focus on another one of my games with a more simple style(Since I wondered if complexity of the style was also an issue for my lack of motivation with Mine), and I do like my other games and ideas and characters, but none of hem were appealing to me like how Mine did. I went into Mine so excited and ready to talk and share my characters, but with my other stories I was just feeling more unmotivated with them, other then "The Magi Academy" which makes sense since that is my comfort story but also I'm gonna work on this in the background since the game is huge.

Another thing I thought about doing while on hiatus was making a test game, where I get used to making games, where I practice. Cause Mine is my first game, but I'm not sure I want it to actually be my first game, but I have no interest in my other games as of now so this game would be simple, a little test to get used to everything that comes with making a game. I'll probably work on this while I'm working on the art style for Mine and the character designs. It will have multiple routes and characters. I wouldn't really call it a dating sim, there will be romance elements but I think more then anything it will be a little "get to know my oc's" type story. Maybe I'll talk about it more if anyone if interested. Although when I make games in the future I'll either make the blogs later, when the game is almost finished or if finished, or at least claim the name and work on them later.

I'd say that Mine is going on a hiatus, at least with this blog, but I will be working on it! Mine won't be getting released soon and when I made this blog I didn't expect Mine to come out this year. Another thing I want to end up doing is dev logs, maybe weekly or monthly, it won't happen soon, but eventually I want to do dev logs. As of now though, I have a lot to think about with the characters and the story/stories. I'll probably work on character personalities and stories before their actual design so I can get back to writing asks, and then I'll be redoing refs and any bigger drawings I've done so far. I also want to have a schedule for answering asks, so I'll probably spend the weekends answering asks and then the weekdays I'll be working on the game, but this is for the future. My ask box and messages will be open though if anyone has any questions :3 I hope that this will help me regain the passion and excitement that I hold for this story, have a great day/night, and thank you for you continued support🩵

[manasurge]

bleh

[cloysterbell]

So I'm an RTD girlie who gave up on doctor who somewhere in the moffat era before chibnall even took over and so I've missed all of thirteen's tenure. I don't have it in me to watch all of her seasons at this moment in time but I LOVE Jodie and your gifs look so compelling.

Would you be able to recommend your top 5 episodes with 13 or something so I can rectify the error of my ways, at least a little bit?

Hmmmmmmm I would say that for a complete Thirteen novice you should watch:

The Woman Who Fell to Earth

It Takes You Away

Spyfall pts 1 & 2

The Haunting of Villa Diodati

And probably Fugitive of the Judoon and The Timeless Children just because those are very important series lore episodes that are important to watch even if you very much disagree with most of the choices that Chibnall made

Also probably The Power of the Doctor so you can watch Thirteen's full regeneration episode (and Jacob Anderson <3)

[front-facing-pokemon]

[miabrown007]

mal in the grishaverse is to alina what jacob in twilight has been to bella. in this essay i'll...

[cooking-with-hailstones]

I know it's such a small thing, but God it means so much to me to see people in fandom spaces actually talking about Palestine

[alarrytale]

Hi Marte! I have a question. How do you differentiate between a closeted queer person doing PR and a straight person doing PR? If I was to use Harry as an example. I think he is closeted and gay but my opinion is mostly based off consistency and patterns since X Factor and 1D rather than him acting flamboyant. We saw him openly talk about his attraction to men before 1DHQ worked with the media to give him a womanizer image. We saw the womanizer image unfold. We see his pr relationships being set up and we can roughly predict what will happen, when it will end, what it is in connection to etc. If I was a new fan I don't think I'd be so sure. Him wearing female clothes and displaying some feminine traits can be put down to him being comfortable in his sexuality as a straight man and wanting to experiment with fashion. Straight men can dress and act flamboyant. Straight celebrities have pr relationships, they push their heterosexuality to sell projects, they might engage in fake relationships because they want to maintain a private life etc. So I'm wondering how would you personally differentiate? I see so many pr relationships happening and I jump to thinking that the celebrities are closeted and have to remind myself that not every person is queer lmao and some real relationships are also used for pr. All I can think is to go by how they act around both sexes. We see that Harry has chemistry with men but lacks it with women. We see that he gravitates towards men and that he's more comfortable around them. That he often looks uncomfortable and awkward around women when he is performing heterosexuality. If it's female friends it's different. It might be harder to tell with HW actors because obviously they play pretend for a living so they can probably perform heterosexuality in public more convincingly. But then I think about J*ke Gyllenh**l and he's a great versatile actor but I've never seen him publicly perform heterosexuality in a convincing way lmao, nothing will convince me that he's straight.

Hi, anon!

This is such a great question! I guess if you were to observe Harry now, without context, without knowing his fandom, what Harry's said and done in the past, or the rumours about him being gay and with Louis, you'd have a hard time differentiating between performative heterosexuality for promo only and performative heterosexuality for promo and closeting purposes.

I agree you'd have little to go on but observing his chemistry with men vs women (but that would be hard to do if he was bi/pan), but also queercoding and of course stereotypes and gaydar. Yes, straight men can dress and act feminine and flamboyant, but it's also very much used as an outlet and queercoding for closeted men. You say that you need to remind yourself that not every person is queer. You are right, but in the business were talking about here there is a much higher rate of queers than in the rest of society. There are more queer celebrities than we know of. They're also more likely to have reasons to hide it than in the rest of society in order to further their career (in the modern western world at least). So if you pick up verbal and non verbal clues, mannerisms and put it together with rejection of traditional gender roles and his occupation and the knowledge of closeting in the industry one should be able to figure it out (at least suspect) without knowing anything else about him.

[thatskindasapphic]

Ok lets see if I get dress coded at work today

[cecil-is-an-eldrich-deity]

I need objective bad characters to be in relationships that aren't exactly healthy but work for them, it's the best they'll get no one else could handle it.

I want obsession and possessiveness, i want bouquets dripping in blood as they confess over a corpse.

Writing Moodboard

[powderedwhiteviolets]

looking back it's amazing how being starved and isolated contributed to so much to my general unlikeability (being judgemental, concurrent inferiority/superiority complex, self-image obsessed to the point of being a control freak about it, unhinged m*sandry). so yeah. glad i both recovered and touched some grass and cured myself of that nasty crap!

[kerosene-saint]

sometimes I get brief moments of realization that not all of my online friends have experienced the total feeling of your body betraying you because of a chronic illness and/or disability. like you get to just live your life. that's insane to me that you never even think about things the way I literally have to. that you never experience this.

[snubbullls]

Autistic meltdowns are so embarrassingggg like 'Hi I am an adult man, watch as I turn someone being rude to me at work into a 3 hour, category 5 toddler tantrum'

[boowritess]

part 2 lol

so apparently it's really fucking hard to get into the SAS. and ontop of that I've been getting tiktoks of people going around an army base asking why they joined. most responses were to pay off student loans, bills, school, (someone said there's was 6 years of prison or school and *mental note for idea*), the recruiter lied or spoilt them, barracks bunny.

141 (poly?) x notsobaddasssoldier!reader

and now i can't stop thinking of soldier!reader. who really half-assed their way through everything - only doing the job for the money and to pay off student loans + they had nothing better to do.

who somehow ends up being adopted by Price (kinda like Gaz i guess ???) all because reader happened to be in the right place at the right time and saved Price's ass while managing to complete a mission the Task Force were doing.

and it's not that you saved his ass or completed the mission that makes Price go *this is mine* - it's the fact that afterwards all you can say is-

"this shit is so not worth paying off my student loans."

"oh fuck i forgot to cancel my subscription. fuckk- waste of fucking money"

- all the while a building is burning in front of you but yeah just not at all concerned about what had just happened. so price just *grabs you by the back of your neck and holds you up, claiming you as part of his task force now.*

(lol you probably can't do that irl but this is fiction sooo suck my ass.)

and laswell's just like no... they are very much still green john. way too green. no.

but it's too late. he's already introducing you to the task force. singing your praises and you're just like

"man he promised to pay off my student loans and give me food." basically how ur recruiter got ya ass.

enough said. you get the whole off the books speech, saving the world by doing things others wouldn't like. but u couldn't give a rats ass - you should but nah...

and like... you know you're the rookie... you're still green... but some of the shit 141 do you just...

"so you just gonna kidnap the wife AND the child...? right... kid, you wanna watch bluey? here..."

"and you do this often...? crazy."

but you don't exactly protest. how could you with how much you get paid. you kinda just side-eye and look away when it's geta a lil crazy. *bombastic side-eye*

and the other 141 guys - oh my days. become just as enormed as price and want to start really trying to amplify your skills. but every time, they start explaining how to do things - the best way to go about a situation or how to fight a certain way.

you pull this face. like your top lip pulls back, your eyebrows scrunch together, and there's a slight frown on your lips as they speak. like you look confused/disgusted. but you don't even realise cause-

"why're you pulling that face?" 141

"that's... that's just my focusing face..."

"oh..." 141 feels bad

then when they do take you in feild you're shaking your head no. like you haven't been around that long. what the fuck? now you're bout to infiltrate an enemy base!?!?!

"can i just wait in the car?"

"no." price

"i'm gonna vomit."

"aim at the enemy." ghost

people think that because you're suddenly in this badass task force that surely they're just using you for your assets.

they all think you're the 141 barracks bunny. and maybe you should be pissed or annoyed or grossed out. but all you can do is sigh and pause from the burger price got you, and let out a long exhale.

"fuck... maybe i can just do onlyfans or be a pornstar... shit maybe it's not too late..."

"military is bascially sex work - selling my body..."

"not that different from what i'm doing now. body being used, check. body sore in the strangest places, check."

your tone so empty, blank and nonchalant, but there's a serious look in your eyes that when you grab your phone out to maybe do a little research on how you could do that, your phone is snatched from your hand by one of the guys and they walk out the room without a second look back.

with an annoyed huff, you go back to eating your burger. but suddenly, you turn to the person who genuinely thought you were a barracks bunny.

"hey you think if i be a barracks bunny i get out of missions and shit?"

"...that's not how it works..." rando.

"fuck."

and maybe you try...

like you go to price's office and the guys are already in there, chatting about something that you should really pay attention too but you can't be assed. instead you unashamedly start to speak...

"if i suck ya'll dicks can i get out the mission?"

"no. you still have to join." gaz says amused

"even if you-" *que long sigh from price* "even if you suck our dicks."

"that's fucked up. i should've done porn."

and with the most hurt and broken-hearted look on your face, you leave the office, closing the door with a dramatic sigh. the guys just stare at the door in... confusion, amusement, and maybe arousal if ya'll dig that

idk man just gimmie more soldier!reader who just really ain't the fucked, there for money, lowkey hungry and doesn't know what the fuck is happening. kinda a pet or little sibling energy that the 141 love.

bonus*

"wait so they aren't sucking our dicks?" *soap says getting slapped in the back of the head by ghost

a/n: brain is rottinnggg. i should be doing so much other shit but... cod just consumes my brain 24/7