#and also................ the next chapter is the bedding.................. idk guys that might be fun (:

[jaimeslanisters]

the pawn in every lover’s game (part thirteen)

Aemond Targaryen x Lannister!Reader

When you’re ten, your father sends you to King’s Landing to befriend a princess and woo a prince. A lioness growing up amongst dragons is a dangerous thing indeed.

crossposted on ao3 masterlist word count: 8.1k notes: no one kill me i’m sorry 😭 i hope all the aemondwives are still around to read this <3 pls enjoy!

King’s Landing is as ugly as a city can be. Famously, it stinks of shit and sweat and, though the city was only built two centuries prior by the Conqueror, it always looks grimy and unkempt. As fond as you are of the Red Keep and the family that lived within its walls, you can’t say the same for the city that housed them.

But in the dazzling sun, with golden and green streamers strung high above your head and Targaryen and Hightower flags streaming in the wind, you can almost be fooled into thinking that King’s Landing is as beautiful as your beloved Rock.

Smallfolk have come out to watch the spectacle and, held at bay by rows and rows of City’s Watch, they crowd the side roads and lean out of buildings’ windows, all of them clambering to catch what little they can of the royal family. A vast majority of them clutch little pennants in their hand, waving them high in the air. While some look homemade with a wayward stitch here and there, the vast majority look professional and sharp, as if done with a practiced hand rather than by a commoner in their spare time.

You wonder if Queen Alicent had them distributed, if she knew that the smallfolk would look at that small, pretty square of fabric days and months and years after this and remember the time that the royal family had thought them worthy and important enough to warrant a role in the first royal wedding in decades.

You wonder what else she has planned, what else she kept hidden behind her pretty smile and her placid nature.

The charger moves forward steadily, slowly and purposefully, its bulk an asset rather than a constraint on its journey. Next to you, Aemond commands his own horse with far more confidence than you feel, keeping it carefully in step with your own.

The cheers start before you ever even step out.

For a moment, you can’t make out any individual sounds in peoples’ screams. It’s all just an indistinguishable wave of sound that crashes down all around you, drowning out any chance of recognition. Someone could be whispering in your ear and you doubt you could make out what they’re saying.

But then it calms, barely, but it calms.

And then you can hear your name. Yours and Aemond’s.

They cheer your name and, when you look over in confusion, they scream louder, waving the pennants in their hands even faster as if to call your attention to them. The screams blur together again but this time you can pick out another phrase.

The dragon and his treasure.

Your cheeks explode in heat and Helaena’s voice echoes in your mind, loud even with all the screams surrounding you.

The dragon’s treasure.

You don’t dare look over at Aemond, suddenly and uncharacteristically shy. You can only imagine the look on his face, his smug pride, and the thought of meeting his heated gaze in front of a crowd of thousands threatens to light your every nerve on fire.

Taking a deep breath, you smile out at the hoards of people, nodding your head in thanks when they wave at you and call your name. If anything, it only encourages them even more and they cheer, their waving hands moving like a rippling ocean. Never before have people driven themselves into this much of a frenzy over you. Even in Lannisport, where Lannisters reigned like kings even now during the rule of the dragons, people hardly paid your presence any mind. The more polite, or should you say more overtly eager, smallfolk would bow or do a quick facsimile of a curtsey but the vast majority would simply nod their head at you if that. Jason would warrant a bigger response, being the Warden of the West and Lord of Casterly Rock, but nothing like this.

You’re not sure if you’ve seen such a friendly response from the smallfolk - ever. Perhaps when Rhaenyra was younger and she was still known as the Realm’s Delight or when Prince Daemon had still frequented the capitol and was a mainstay at the tourneys, this was how they were received but that had ended before even your birth and, somehow, you can’t imagine even they were cheered like this on their rides out into the city.

This wasn’t something to do with either your’s and Aemond’s noble lineage or with being a prince and a lady. This was something else entirely.

No, this was the tourney. This was the singers getting what they wanted with their songs and their stories.

As you move forward through the streets, towards the areas that aren’t as densely packed as by the Red Keep, the calls die down and people clap or whistle, still waving their pennants in the air.

It’s as quiet as it will be for right now and, pulling on a well of confidence, you look over at Aemond.

For once, the gods do not embarrass you by having you be caught off guard with him already looking at you. Aemond is sitting tall on his horse, looking more warriorlike than ever, as he rides in silence, staring straight ahead almost stoically. For a moment, you think that he’s unaffected by the almost impossibly warm response from King’s Landing, that, perhaps, as stern as he is, he’s not caught quite as off guard by the welcome as you are.

Then one particularly heavy step from his charger shifts his hair, disrupting the silky sheet, and, underneath his silver tresses, you can make out just one of his ears poking out.

The top of it is tinged pink.

Aemond is blushing.

You can’t hold back your delighted laugh and, when Aemond’s eye darts to meet yours, he looks almost sheepish to your well-trained eye.

With a gentle tug on the reins, your charger breaks free of the steady path it had been on, moving to walk closer to Aemond. You’re not so close that it is inappropriate but you’re close enough to finally talk to him and you beam, feeling something dangerously like joy on such a terrible day.

“My, oh, my,” you tease, fighting back another laugh when Aemond pointedly looks away, keeping his body angled towards you as to make it clear that he’s still listening to you. “Does the love and admiration of the people of this city embarrass my prince?”

“Enough,” he hisses, no real heat behind his words, and you shake your head, still plainly delighted. “They’re all still amused by the scandal. It’ll pass.”

You tilt your head in thought. “Perhaps I should send a thank you present to poor Erren Florent. He and his son have done more for our image than I could have ever dreamed possible.”

Finally, Aemond jerks his head to look at you, his sole eye narrowed. “The continued survival of his House is present enough.”

You throw your head back and laugh. There’s no bite in his tone, no real anger or heat, and when you look back at him, the corner of his mouth is quirked up in a small smile. “I told you that tourneys were good for some things.”

“People would love you given the opportunity. You did not need Victor Florent for that,” he says, shaking his head, and you smile despite yourself, feeling your cheeks heat up.

“You’re giving me far too much credit,” you reply after a moment, laughing again. “And perhaps the smallfolk too little. They love a good story, a good song. They’d be just as happy with another lady in my position.”

Aemond hums. “They’d be happy with another Targaryen prince in place of me. Happier even if the prince was Daeron.”

“Perhaps but the Gods have seen to make it fit that we are the lady and the prince that the smallfolk love - at least, for now.” You look back over at them, at the endless crowd with countless people. They all cheer for you, they all smile for you, but you know how quickly they could turn.

Princess Rhaenyra was once the Realm’s Delight, loved and adored. Now, the smallfolk are more liable to call her the Whore of Dragonstone and spit and sneer at her name than they are to ever remember they once had worshiped her.

They love you and Aemond - for now. Gaining their affection had been the easiest part. The struggle would be keeping it.

You look over at Aemond and, this time, you’re not surprised to see he’s already looking at you.

He doesn’t say anything but he doesn’t have to.

He knows.

——————————–

As you near the Dragonpit, for once, you don’t hear the growls of dragons muffled by tons of stone or the sound of the earth shifting and moaning under the tremendous weight of the beasts that call the hill home. It is instead drowned out by the drone of the crowds, some cheering, some speaking, all of them focused on you. Unlike the procession with its narrow roads and alleys, with the buildings stuffed with people leaning out of the window, the Dragonpit sits on Rhaenys’s hill, surrounded by trees with the structure itself serving as a rocky, jagged scar onto the greenery. Smallfolk line the base of the stairs leading up into the building, a massive crowd not unlike the tourney, and you know only from hearing from the Queen that a lucky few have been ushered into the Dragonpit itself to witness the exchange of vows personally. On the stairs, it seems that every septa and septon in the Seven Kingdoms has come to honor Helaena and Aegon’s nuptials. They line the sides, one septa for each septon, and they all bow their heads as you ride past, averting their eyes from you as if you really were the Maiden incarnate and not just a lady playing dress up.

As you near the top, you glance behind yourself, your grip tightening on the reins of the charger to steady yourself and stay rooted to the saddle. The look down the stairs is almost dizzyingly tall and your grip tightens that much more but your eyes focus and, far in the distance, you can see the crowd moving, pressing close all around two small figures. From here, you can just make out Helaena, the shockingly white ivory of her dress and cloak a beacon amongst the dark tones of everyone around her. You can’t make out any details - you can’t see the emeralds that have been woven into the mass of braids in her hair, the shiny rubies in her tiara that glitter and catch the light. You certainly can’t see the blood red of the thread you had used to help her embroider the three-headed dragon of the Targaryens onto her cloak, the swirling black thread Helaena had carefully woven into her sigil to make the dragon more living, more dimensional.

While embroidering, Helaena had pricked her finger and some blood had splattered onto the white cloak. You had hidden it with a carefully placed claw but it was there, staining the heavy fabric. There hadn’t been time to attempt to wash it out. You had just covered it up.

There hadn’t been time.

You feel dizzy, faint with nerves and something you can’t identify, and you turn back to face the front, taking a deep breath, wrapping the reins around your hands and squeezing tight. There’s been an attempt to dress up the Dragonpit to look warm and welcoming with impossibly tall columns of flowers and delicate streamers of silk creating a canopy to lead the guests in. It does little to soften the harsh architecture, as much as placing a bouquet on the Iron Throne would lighten the throne room, and your stomach twists up into impossible knots when servants move to meet you and Aemond, their hands reaching up to grab at the reins and pull the chargers to a stop.

Closer to the massive doors of the Dragonpit, you can see Rhaenys, Daeron, and Alicent, the three of them talking amongst themselves as attendants flutter all around you. In Daeron’s arms, he holds a folded mass of fabric close to his chest, squeezing it tight as if someone was going to rip it from him.

The wedding cloak.

It had been the same one that Viserys had pinned around Alicent Hightower’s neck. The same one that had been pinned around Aemma Arryn and Good Queen Alysanne and Queen Rhaenys. It was old and most of it was patches rather than the original fabric but it had been hung on the shoulders of all the old queens before. It would be hung from the necks of all future queens.

You wonder how many of them had wanted it to be.

You sense Aemond next to you more than you see him or hear him and, just like in the courtyard, he grabs you at the waist and you lean down to grab a hold of his shoulders. Carefully, he picks you up and sets you on the ground. Your legs sway slightly from the ride and you grip his shoulders tighter to steady yourself, his own grip tightening in response.

Breath caught in your throat, you look up at him through your eyelashes, wishing you could say something or do something. You wish he could reach down and press his forehead to yours as he had in the training yards, as you had in his room in Driftmark. You wish he could cup your cheeks, trap you in the heat of his body again.

But he can’t. Not here. Not in front of the whole of Kings’ Landing.

Not now. Not now.

“Thank you,” you murmur as you pull away, letting go of his shoulders, moving your hands down to needlessly pull at your dress in an attempt to distract yourself, to ground yourself.

Aemond doesn’t say anything but he squeezes your waist one last time before he pulls away, offering you his arm. You reach for it, pulling it closer to your body than is technically allowable but not too much for anyone to notice. The chainmail is cool against the thin fabric of the linen, a welcome relief, and his arm is firm, years of training evident. He’s strong and unyielding, relentless and resolute.

He can be my strength today. You tell yourself, holding on tight. If Aemond can be strong today, so can I.

His hand comes up to cover yours, squeezing it, and you glance up at him, biting the inside of your cheek.

“It’s what is honorable,” he murmurs. “They’re doing their duty to our family - just as we do.”

Why are some duties so horrific? Why are some so easy? Why her? Why us?

You nod your head back to him after a moment, feeling off-kilter and dazed. If Aemond wasn’t standing with you, if he wasn’t walking and holding you, you think you would have already run down the steps to Helaena, to beg and plead with her to run, her honor and duty be damned,

After all, what was honor and duty in the face of the death of her girlhood?

It’s loud enough that the Queen and her two companions don’t notice your approach until you’re right up next to them. Rhaenys offers a polite smile while Daeron grins but Alicent looks dazed, eyes staring off towards the stairs, looking endlessly past it.

“When are we set to begin?” You ask in lieu of a greeting, forcing a smile on your face for good measure. You don’t dare to look up towards Aemond, don’t want to see the look of sympathy in his eyes.

Be as unyielding as the Rock.

Daeron nudges his mother slightly, just a brush on the arm, but the Queen startles nonetheless. Her brown eyes stare up at her son, wide and guileless like a little girl, and for a moment, it’s clear to all that she’s completely and utterly lost, that whoever she sees when she looks up at her youngest is certainly not her son.

But then her face clears, there’s light back in her eyes and she shakes her head firmly. “Soon,” she says, voice firm, hardened. “Aegon is already inside and, once Helaena reaches the stairs, he will walk down to the altar by himself. Then it goes Crone, Smith, Mother, Warrior, Maiden, before Father walks in with Helaena herself. Then the ceremony.”

Alicent goes on to explain the ceremony but you tune her out - your part was done. The Maiden was a largely ritualistic role with your role being done before the wedding itself, through your fasting and prayer and song and your continued purity. All you would have to do during the wedding itself would be to stand in the front row, alongside the other attendants, and bow your head and pray when it was proper. Daeron was the only one who would actually have to do something - he would have to approach the alter to hand off the cloak when it was time to exchange vows - and, from the looks of it, he was approaching it as seriously as he had approached the tourney with the same steely-eyed determination.

You suppose it was like the tourney in a way, only that the warriors wore the finest of silks and had capes of velvet as their armor.

You just wish there was a way to win this particular tourney.

“It’s a lovely ceremony,” Rhaenys muses after a moment, and, almost in relief at the distraction, you look over at her. She’s staring up at the Dragonpit, her dark eyes roaming over the banners and flags and streamers. “Lovely day as well. Bodes well for a union.”

Aemond makes a sound of agreement and the princess looks over at her kin, eyes flashing as she takes him in.

Contrary to what Aemond had said in the library days ago, Rhaenys does not look at the rider of Vhagar with hate or malice in her eyes. That is not to say, however, that she looks at him with warmth or kindness. No, she looks at him and she is searching, digging in deep and deep and trying to find something.

Trying to find whatever it was that the Queen of All Dragons had found in Aemond Targaryen that she had also found in Laena Velaryon.

Princess Rhaenys, the Queen Who Never Was, could see what her granddaughter could not - a dragon could not be stolen. It could only be won. That did not mean that she was happy with it or angry or sad. It simply was and all she wanted to know was the truth of it.

“Is that a Valyrian belief, my princess?” You ask, standing steady when she pulls her piercing gaze away from Aemond to peer at you.

Rhaenys smiles, her face softening ever so slightly, a joke dancing in her stormy blue eyes. “I do not believe so. It is simply my belief. It was sunny when I was married - good weather for sailing.”

“It is different for the Andals,” you reply, absentmindedly tapping your fingers on Aemond’s arm. “If it rains, that means that the bride will not weep during her marriage for the Gods have already cried for her.”

“It’s not raining,” Daeron says, the smallest hint of anxiety creeping into his tone.

Against your will, a smile creeps on your face as you watch him tighten his grip even more on the cloak, his mouth tightening. “It certainly is not but they’re not Andals, are they?” You tease, raising your eyebrow, and leaning forwards slightly. “Perhaps the sun is what they need.”

“Fire and blood,” Aemond murmurs, glancing upward toward the blazing sun. “Dragons were born from the flame of the earth. Perhaps the fire in the sky will keep their union warm.”

Alicent nods, more forceful than need be, as if she’s forcing herself to agree. “It is a blessing. The Gods have declared it so.”

You eye her with her stiff lip and her tense shoulders and, for the first time today, you realize you don’t feel anger or contempt when you look at her. Not towards her, not towards yourself.

You feel endless pity. You feel your heart breaking.

She’s trussing her children up as sacrifices, wrapping the nooses around their necks so no one else would do it, leading them to the slaughter so it would have been a gentle hand that coaxed them to their death.

How can you do it? How do you find the strength? How do you wake in the morning?

Please tell me how. Please teach me. Tell me that I haven’t done the same to Cerelle. Light the way forward so I know there is one.

You almost ask it. You almost beg.

But then the bells begin and it sounds like death.

Alicent jerks, as if yanked by strings on her back, and her brown eyes flit around until they land on you, and, for a moment, it’s only the two of you standing here, at the gateway to a fathomless pit.

How do you do it? You ask.

There is no answer in her eyes. There’s only the awful knowing.

——————————–

You used to practice walking down the aisle with Helaena. You’d take these deep, dramatic steps, dipping nearly impossibly low to the ground as you moved. More often than not, you’d tumble to the side and break down into giggles, laughing as if it was all a silly game that the two of you were playing.

Even as a little girl, you had known that that was what it could only be. Lords and ladies did not marry for love. They married for honor, for duty, and for family.

It had been nice to pretend.

There’s no way to pretend now.

Tucked away in the back, a row of goldcloaks shielding you from the massive crowd of nobles and peasants alike, you watch as Aegon makes the long, lonely march.

He’s always been the smallest of his brothers but you wonder if he’s ever looked as small as he does now.

You watch him go, staring at his diminishing back, at the crown-not-crown tucked away in his curls.

Eventually, you’ll return here, you realize, only it won’t be a wedding. That time, no one else will follow him. He will walk by himself, a lonely ruler of man, and his hair will be free and clean. That is, until the High Septon anoints him with the seven blessings and the seven oils and when the crown is placed on his head, until you all have to bow to him and declare fealty. Then his crown would be heavy.

But he would be lonely nonetheless.

Before long, he reaches the altar and for a moment, he stands cluelessly, plainly staring helplessly at the High Septon until that old man with the strange pale eyes subtly directs him to his spot, on the right of the seven-pointed star glass window.

There’s a beat where everyone stares at Aegon, at his slim and narrow back that stands, shockingly, without a tremor.

Then voices begin to sing.

It’s a long, old hymn, the first one any child born in the Light of the Seven ever learns. Even if you went deaf, if you lost all sense of hearing or even sight to see someone’s lips moving to the words, you know, deep in your soul, that you could recognize the tremor of the ground when the bards begin to play their instruments, the vibrato from the singers shaking the very air.

It’s never shaken like this, never as strong in your soul. It feels like defeat. It feels like a victory.

You watch as Rhaenys moves with nary a falter. Her arm must sting from the entire ride from the Red Keep holding up the lamp but you could never tell now. She’s as steady as the statues you had prayed to in the Sept, as unyielding as the columns of rock that hold the dome high above your heads. This is nothing to her. She cares little for the children of Alicent Hightower and, even if she did, she’s a Targaryen. A brother marrying a sister was what she was accustomed to. That if she had been born with a brother, she might have married him instead of Lord Corlys.

Your stomach twists. You can’t even imagine. The thought feels sickening and unbearable and the mere idea of looking at little Loren, your tiny baby brother that you love to rock in your arms and kiss on his chubby cheeks, and having to see a potential husband rather than merely your brother makes you want to throw up here and now.

But they’re Targaryens and they will do as they need to keep their blood pure. It’s a burden that Helaena has grown with. A duty that Aegon and Aemond and Daeron have had to live with.

You can’t even imagine how they bear it. How the mere sight of their own family doesn’t make them want to scream and scream and beg for anything else.

The hymn continues and you feel rather than see or hear the Smith slip away. Even though you know deep in your rattling bones that it is Daeron, you still turn to stare. He’s gone pale, with nerves or sickness you’re not sure, but he’s moving forward steadily. Rather than hugging the cloak to his chest, he holds it out like he’s carrying something precious and, with the way that’s folded, you can see the crimson dragon curling, the roar of its head.

An offering.

You tighten your hold on Aemond.

Who could ever want to be a Targaryen?

You feel possessive of your two, of Helaena and Aemond both. You wish you could keep them chained to you. They’re mine you want to scream. But they’ve never belonged to just you. They’ve always been each other’s, been Aegon’s and Alicent’s and Daeron’s, been the Realm’s.

The smallfolk had cheered for you as the dragon’s treasure but Aemond gets to possess you in a way you can’t possess him, in a way you can’t possess Helaena.

The blessing and the curse of the Targaryens.

Alicent moves next and you know that Aemond will go after and something in you roars.

You are a lioness of the Rock. You are the blood of kings. Not even two hundred years ago, princes would be fighting for your hand. We may have bent the knee to the dragon but you will never cower before them.

Your mother’s voice reverberates, stronger than the hymn, stronger than the singing and shaking. It doesn’t rattle your bones - it is your bones. It is everything about you, from the curve of your eye down to the blood that runs in your veins.

They’re Targaryens but you’re a Lannister.

That means something. Maybe not to the smallfolk. Maybe not to the Targaryens themselves but it means something to you.

Aemond’s arm twists in your grasp and, for only a moment, you tighten your grip - not to draw strength but to claim him.

He had pressed a bloody kiss onto your forehead and crowned you in golden and crimson. Only he could have done that. Only a Targaryen could have such audacity, could survive the scrutiny and the attention that would follow such an act. You can’t do the same - you can’t wield a sword or slay your enemies yourself, your name wouldn’t survive such a show of your power.

But you can claim him.

Not like you want. Not like you need.

But you can claim him as he had claimed you.

Aemond stills, looking down at you, and your eyes flicker to the golden flower tucked in his chainmail. It’s not enough. You want more and more and more.

“My lady?” He asks and, finally, you glance up at him. His purple eyes are dark, swallowing all the light, and, when he looks at you, you know that he only sees you, is only concerned with you.

The Dragonpit was blessed by the High Septon - it’s as good as a sept now. Promises mean more now. They have more weight if it’s in front of the gods.

Instead of saying it all, of promising him that you’ll be as good as any sword in defense of him and his, instead of bleeding your enemies dry if only to trace the marble cut of his cheekbones with the blood, you pluck another poppy from the braided mass of your hair. It’s red, the deep crimson a striking stain between the two of you.

Golden and red - the Lannister colors. He crowned me with it too.

You can’t do the same. Not here and not how you like but you want him to be yours like you are his.

With a steady hand, you tuck the poppy in with its golden companion, twisting the stem around the delicate chain, securing it so tightly so it was interwoven with the armor as the other links themselves were. His hand comes up to cover yours, pressing your hand to his chest, close enough so you can feel the thump of his heartbeat underneath your palm. It’s steady, strong. You feel it in the own echo of your own.

The hymn turns to the verse of the Warrior and you feel Aemond’s hand flex as if he means to pull it towards his mouth again. You beat him to the punch though.

Quickly, you push yourself onto your tiptoes, rising up so you can press a kiss on the sharp angle of his cheekbone, right underneath his eyepatch. You overshoot slightly, your lips brushing the seam of the leather and his skin. He’s almost impossibly warm underneath you like the heat of a fireplace when you curl up in front of it during a cold winter night.

Somewhere in the back of your mind, you can hear your father’s warning, can almost feel the accusing stares of King’s Landing if they could see you being so intimately close to a prince of the realm. For once, you tell him to leave.

You’re safe here, behind the goldcloaks’ backs, tucked away towards the entrance of the Dragonpit. As relatively safe as you can be away from your table in the library.

You settle back down onto the ground and, after a beat, pull away. You drop your hand from his chest, pull your arm out of his grasp.

Then you smile at him, nodding your head.

He looks you over, carefully. Behind him, a servant steps forward, the panic in their eyes evident the longer that Aemond delays his procession down to the altar. Aemond doesn’t move for them, however, not until he’s satisfied that you’re fine.

Honor and duty. This will protect their family.

You’re a lion of the Rock. They’re the blood of dragons. If none of you can bear it, there is none who can.

Aemond looks at you for a moment longer and again, you nod, feeling something in you crack and harden.

It must. You have to.

Finally, after a second that feels like it stretches into eternity, he gives you one firm nod of his head before he pulls away and is ushered down into the aisle. There’s a soft murmur in the crowd when they spot him, nowhere near the screams of the streets but somehow that much more holy against the background of the constant hymn.

You’re alone.

You look over your shoulder, towards the massive doors of the Dragonpit. Helaena is there, still making her way up the stairs, her grandfather at her side.

Soon. Soon there would be no going back, no return.

It doesn’t frighten you as bad as it once had even if it does not lessen the nausea.

You wonder if that anxiety will ever go away, if there will ever be a moment when you look at Helaena and not wish things could be different. She was made for this but that didn’t mean she had to be, didn’t mean you couldn’t pray that her husband could have been someone who loved her for her rather than her older brother that drank and whored his way through life.

The hymn continues, wrapping its way around your throat and squeezing tight. Your turn is coming. Soon you will walk down the aisle as the very image of the Maiden, representing all of her virtues and purity in the eyes of the capitol. When they speak of this wedding, they’ll speak of you as well.

You wonder what they’ll say - if they’ll swoon over your beauty or whisper about whether or not a lion could truly be as kind and gentle as the songs promise the Maidens always are.

You don’t think you can. You know you don’t want to. Maiden that you are, there’s nothing more you want in the world than to sink your teeth in King Viserys and tear and tear and tear until there’s nothing left of him and wear his blood and gore as a mark of honor, carry the title of Kingslayer as a prize rather than an insult. You had prayed for Victor Florent’s death, had mocked and taunted him, had smiled as he had laid dying. You had sent spies into his grieving family’s home. You had sent your sister into the frigid and frozen North, away from her family and into danger.

And the worst part was that you would do it all again.

You couldn’t change a thing and, most damning of all, you wouldn’t change a single thing.

You had already done awful things for your family. You would do even worse sins in the future.

The hymn changes and it is high and piercing in your ears. It’s almost an insult, shrieking and shrill. You want to grimace and pull back and away.

You smile instead. When the servants turn to guide you down to the aisle, you broaden your smile into a grin, making sure to make your cheeks burn with coquettish joy and, when you float past the servants to the starting point, you bow your head towards them in respect. When you glance up at them, they look almost impossibly pleased, unable to keep their glee to themselves.

Let the singers write about that.

Soon enough, they gesture you down the aisle and, when you step out, there’s a notable whisper in the crowd, eyes turning to stare at you. Someone close to the exit, a peasant girl clinging to her father’s hand, exclaims excitedly about the poppies in your hair, about the matching ones in Prince Aemond’s chainmail. The whispers spread from there and you make sure to keep your head bowed in solemn devotion, hands clasped to your chest in a soundless prayer, seemingly above it all. It doesn’t stop their enthusiasm, however. It’s nearly the exact opposite - they’re charmed by your faith, thankful to see a fellow devotee of the Seven in the lady they already loved.

The journey down to the front row before the altar drags. People are interested in you, invested in you even, but you’re not the main attraction, not even close. As much as they stare at you, their eyes keep sliding over to the entrance, the anticipation growing and growing until it's a palpable swell looming over everyone’s heads, ready to crash down at any moment.

As you near the destination, you raise your head up to look up towards the altar, moving your lips in a whispered prayer that is more instinct than any actual thought. Aegon still faces away from you and, slightly below him with the bridal cloak still cradled in his arms, Daeron stares at you with a small smile, trying his best to look encouraging even if it's tempered by his clear discomfort at being so close to the center of attention.

But you don’t focus on either of them. You stare at the High Septon. In front of the stained window of the Seven-Pointed Star, he stares at you, as implacable as any stone made of stone. His crystal crown breaks up the light, scattering small rays of shining colors, a rainbow that undulates with every small movement of the sun. He’s a king of a different type of kingdom, ultimate power of another kind.

His eyes don’t frighten you anymore. Instead, you feel a tight ball of envy as you stare up at him. He was no more royal than you were. Maybe even less so. For all you know, this High Septon was plucked from obscurity, from a noble family far lesser than yours, or, even possibly, from a common one. You wouldn’t know - they give up their names when they rise to their position. For all extents and purposes, the High Septon’s life only began when he became the High Septon. He’s less than nobody.

But he’s powerful. Far more than you. Far more than Aemond. Perhaps, traitorously so, more than the King himself.

You want it.

You smile at the High Septon, bowing your head so he doesn’t see the jealousy on your face and decide you’re the unholiest Maiden to ever exist. When you look up, he raises one arm to welcome you magnanimously and you curtsey deep, your knees feeling as if they’ll brush against the cool stone beneath you if you drop even a smidge shorter. You move to join the other attendants, settling in your spot next to Aemond, keeping your head low as you do so.

The room holds its breath.

Then the air leaves the Dragonpit entirely.

The rattle of the hymn feels minuscule compared to this. Everything feels entirely too small to describe this moment. The only time you’ve ever felt everything shift beneath you like this was when you first saw Dreamfyre all those years ago, when her roar had shaken the very foundations of the earth and her fire had lit the air itself on fire.

You can’t turn around to stare like you want - it would be entirely too uncouth coming from a royal attendant - but you tilt your head slightly, staring at the aisle. Across the way, you can see Baela standing with the Velaryons and the Hightowers. She has no qualms about turning to stare and, judging from her slightly agape mouth, Helaena is a sight to be seen.

For the first time since the ride with Aemond, you feel a genuine smile rise up on your face.

It’s what she deserves, what she’s earned.

Finally, they’ll see her like you always have.

Like a wave rushing towards the shore, you feel Helaena move closer and closer, the song faltering as they see her, as if a hymn for the gods themselves can’t even compare to the sight of her.

Anticipation mounts in your chest and you close your eyes.

In your mind, you can still see her as the little girl she was when you first met her when she had said one of her strange ramblings rather than her name. You can still see her smiling at you over a mantis carefully cupped in her hands. You can still see her in the gardens, turning her face out to the Blackwater Bay.

When you open your eyes, you see her as she is now.

Lord Hand Otto walks with her, arm in arm, but you don’t even register him, not when you’re looking at her.

She glows. She’s unreal. She is who they whisper about when they talk about the perfect, unattainable beauty of the Targaryens.

You want to cry.

Her hair is braided out of her face, a crown that is not quite a crown, gleaming emeralds nestled within it. The rest of her curls fall around her face and down her back, perfectly twisted to fall in identical ringlets. The bodice of her white gown clings to her like a second skin before flaring out at her shoulders, her sleeves dragging on the ground next to her, and at the waist.

The cloak is pinned around her neck.

Your eyes catch on it, on the embroidery you had worked with her with. Your gaze fixes on one of the dragon’s delicate claws, at the curve of it, and you wonder if the blood is still there, if it’s as bright red as it had been, or if it’s faded to an ugly and dull brown.

You wonder if it makes a difference. You wonder why you care.

Helaena doesn’t turn to look at you, doesn’t even falter as she moves towards the altar. She walks with such a confidence, with such a grace, that it’s difficult to reconcile her with the pale waif of a girl that had trembled with nerves in the throne room and had torn at her napkins. This is a Queen.

You wish it was a real crown on her head. You wish this was a coronation instead of a wedding.

In the end, you suppose it is.

When Helaena and Otto reach the altar, the hymn finally, finally ends and, with a deep breath, Aegon turns to face his sister.

This close to the altar, you can see how Aegon’s face is a careful mask, a delicate shield that protects him. He stares at his sister, at his bride, and you wonder if he sees even a piece of what you see, if it’s possible. You wish you could even fault him for it.

Lord Otto holds out Helaena’s hand and Aegon stares at it for an impossibly long second and, just as the first whisper of fear begins to rise up in you, he takes it. As he does, he manages a smile at his sister. A shaky, timid smile as if he’s unsure of what he’s doing, completely lost and clueless like a child, and that familiar sympathy rises up in you. Viciously and without remorse, you push it down as far as you can.

There’s no more time for that.

Helaena moves up to her spot on the altar and, together, the two siblings kneel together in front of the High Septon, hand in hand.

The seven vows begin.

The High Septon speaks in a booming voice, near deafening this close to him. Even still, you wonder if, in the back, the common folk can even hear a single word he is saying. You wonder if that little girl with her father is mouthing along to the seven vows or if she’s still whispering about the poppies, maybe even squealing about the beautiful princess in her wedding gown.

The seven blessings are invoked.

Your heart thuds loud and relentless in your chest. It’s dragging by. It’s speeding past. Suddenly desperate to be moored in this moment, you reach out for Aemond’s hand, his own immediately wrapping around yours in response. It's scalding, the heat surrounding you, and you want to pull it into you. You want it to light you up from the inside. You want it to be the only thing you can feel.

The seven promises begin.

Helaena and Aegon turn towards each other, hands still clasped tightly together. With hardly a falter in their voice, they go through the seven promises with each other. Like this, it almost looks right. It almost looks like this is how it is meant to be.

Now, it is time for the exchange of the cloaks.

Otto Hightower steps forward, tall and proud, and, with zero hesitation or reluctance, unclasps the bridal cloak from Helaena’s neck. You squeeze Aemond’s hand, your heart pounding even harder, and dimly, you recognize that he’s pulling your hand closer to him, pressing it into his stomach as if knowing that you need more than he can give right now.

The Lord Hand steps down, leaving the altar, and Daeron surges forward, almost skittish in his nerves, but for a moment, Helaena stands bare. It’s just her. No cloak.

You hope years into the future, this is what you’ll remember. Not the fear. Not the nausea. Not the anger and the rage. You’ll just remember Helaena, free of any familial obligations, beautiful in the golden light of the sun.

Daeron passes the cloak to Aegon, retreating back down to join his grandfather and the rest of the attendants at the bottom. After only a moment, Aegon unfurls the cloak with a flourish, shaking it out.

It’s beautiful because it must be but up close, you can see where seamstresses have tried to match the patches to the existing fabric. No one will see it, certainly not the smallfolk in the very back of the Dragonpit, but you can see it. Surely, when Aegon the Conqueror first pinned it to the neck of his sister-wife Rhaenys, it must have been a thing of beauty. Now it just seems sad, a fading remnant of glorious days.

Aegon steps closer to his sister, his amethyst eyes glowing with frantic energy, and, with barely trembling hands, he drapes it on Helaena’s shoulders, clasping it in front of her. Helaena doesn’t sway under the heavy weight and doesn’t react other than bowing her head in respect.

A part of you wishes you could laugh about her switching out one dragon cloak for another but you can’t. Not when there’s still a scream building in your throat no matter how hard you try to press it down. Your nails dig into Aemond’s hand and you know it must be painful but, try as you may, you can’t force your hands to loosen.

He bears it though. He doesn’t yank his hand away or shake you off. He remains steady, flexing into your sharp nails, teetering on the line of drawing blood and bleeding for you.

You want to tell him thank you. You want to echo the vows that Helaena and Aegon are saying to each other.

I am yours and you are mine you want to whisper, want to protect between the two of you.

But you can’t. Because you know the moment you open your mouth, you will cry or scream and neither can happen.

“With this kiss,” Aegon says in a tremulous voice. Helaena looks up at him and you can’t see her face but she’s steady, strong.

She’s a dragon like the rest of them.

Aegon looks at her face, openly pleading, but whatever he sees in his sister’s face drives him forward. “With this kiss,” he repeats again, this time firmer. “I pledge my love.”

He doesn’t hesitate. He leans down and presses his lips against his sister’s - against his wife’s - and the Dragonpit explodes with cheers around you. For a moment, you feel dazed and this doesn’t feel real. It feels like you’ve been pushed underwater and you’re watching this all play out on the surface.

But then it is real. You can’t pinpoint when. You can’t pinpoint how. But as you look up at them, suddenly you can force yourself to see this new reality - Helaena is married to Aegon in the eyes of the gods and the realm.

Your grip loosens before you let go of Aemond entirely. Your arms feel heavy but you bring your hands together to clap, clapping hard enough to feel your palms sting. Next to you, Aemond only waits a moment for you before he joins in, less enthusiastic than you but then again, you already know you’re overcompensating.

Helaena and Aegon pull away from each other and the High Septon says something but even this close, you can’t make out his words over the cheering. The future King and Queen of Westeros turn towards the whole of King’s Landing and they look beautiful.

This is what it was meant to be.

They stare out into the crowd, their matching amethyst eyes shining with emotion as they take in all the excitement and the adoration of a people meeting their future rulers for the first time.

“The people will love them,” You say after a moment, tearing your eyes away from them to look over at Aemond.

He hums, turning to look at you, tilting down slightly so he can hear you over the roar. “They’ll love Helaena by any means.”

You smile. “She’s easy to love. It’ll be impossible for them not to.”

“That will be the easy part,” he replies. “We can help them with the rest.”

“Of course, they have a student of history and philosophy as their brother,” you tease, fighting with all you have to not look over to Helaena and Aegon still standing on the altar.

“And they’ll have a lion as their good-sister,” Aemond murmurs, leaning down far enough so you can feel the ghost of his lips brushing against your forehead.

You can feel your face explode with warmth but you still manage a nod and a small smile. “Aye. They’ll have that as well.”

[lightwing-s]

𝐁𝐀𝐁𝐘 𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐏𝐒

𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐯𝐢 ; 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐦

pairing: jason todd x fem! reader

summary: It was a normal night, till he had to look for you. And then, the storm began.

rating: 18+ (MDNI)

word count: 8k warnings: pregnancy, talks of abusive parents, mentions of abortion.

a/n: as Jesus is reborn, so am I! Happy Easter to everybody that waited so long for this chapter to come out. I'm sorry it took me so long, but I got so busy this past month that if I hear anyone say 'illicit trade' or 'online trafficking' I might kill somebody lol. I hope this chapter compensates for the time, though. It is mostly Jason's pov, with references to the reader as she/her rather than you because I thought it might sound better. Idk, lmk if it's weird lol.

a/n 2: also, I can't begin to thank everyone for the incredible support in this series. I've got so many messages that had me on the verge of tears with happiness and how sweet they were. I trully hope I'm capable of continuing to bring you guys joy through this series and other stories. I love you all, and thank you so much for allowing me to finally let my ideas become words, and my words to have meaning

reblogs and interactions are always appreciated ! ♡

links: previous ; next ; series masterlist ; general masterlist

A cold shiver ran up Jason’s spine. The soft breeze coming off the opened fridge climbed up his shirtless torso, drying the sweat on his skin and leaving it cold and sticky. The nearly freezing water slid down his throat, giving him the refreshment he craved for after a long session of training, and an even longer day of work.

It was finally over. His session, his day, his week. Saturday couldn't have come sooner. Sighing in relief, he refilled the water bottle, shoved it back into it’s previous place and turned on his heel heading for a much needed shower. He was tired. Drained. And all he wanted to do was drop down in his bed and sleep for a whole entire night.

Picking out his phone from his joggers’ pocket, he took one last peek at the screen. Almost 10:00pm, and a weather report of an incoming rainstorm soon. Perfect, he thought. He loved to sleep to the sound of rain. So, he locked his phone, threw it on the sofa, and rushed to the bathroom, hoping to get a shower before it got too cold, leaving fast enough to get to bed before the raindrops started to fall.

He stripped down his pants in front of his mirror, a quick stop to admire his progress. Chest, arms, and back. All proof of his hardwork and commitment. And yet, a reddish mark by his neck was what really caught his attention. Roy had poked fun at it earlier, but his joke couldn’t be farther from the truth. A bug bite, as simple as that. An allergic reaction to a stupid bug. But that stupid reaction, that stupid mark, brought him back to the last time something like that was left on his skin.

Yn had left with countless marks after that brief session in a stranger’s office. Enough to last him a while. But not more than the first time he had you, right under the same roof he was at now. Marks on his neck, on his chest, arms, and back. If he thought too long of it, he could feel her lips warming his skin, making his mind go crazy, and his blood to boil.

Shaking his head, he tried to keep those thoughts away. It wasn’t time. It wasn’t appropriate. Yn was now the mother of his child. Nothing more than that. He couldn’t keep the thought lingering. So, sliding the glass door open, he entered the shower, hoping to wash away all the thoughts off his mind.

As the cold water hit his shoulders, relief spread to his entire body, even if the chilling weather of the start of fall was not the most adequate for such water temperature. Sinking his head under the cascade, he closed his eyes, mind emptying, and peace reaching him after a long and rough week.

It was silent in his head. But it wasn’t enough.

He couldn’t wash his mind off of Yn. It was first the night he had you over, and under him, moaning his name repeatedly in his ear.  He remembered how soft her skin felt, how light was her touch, and yet he couldn’t forget the burning pain her nails had left on his back. 

He drowned in the memory of her intoxicating smell, and how the skin under her ear tasted sweet. For a moment, even through the freezing water, he swore he could feel her blood catching fire running through her body, warming him along the way through their skins, glued to one another, tangled in each other, in a night he would never forget.

And then came the memories of the second time. How annoyed she was, and how easily she gave in to him. It was like her body responded to his, knowing it was only him that could give him the pleasure she craved. He missed the feral, animalistic, feelings of that afternoon, and how she fit perfectly around him.

Stop, he thought to himself, opening his eyes to the bright room. This isn’t okay. But again, it was already too late. His throbbing cock rested against his lower abdomen, hard and leaking. He smelled his arousal mixed between the smell of his soap, and his hand reached for his tip, light touches already driving him insane. Resting his hand on the cold porcelain tile, he allowed his eyes to close again.

And then, he remembered the picture. Sent to him just a few hours earlier. It wasn't dirty. On the contrary, it was as innocent as one could be. It was her, playing along with a baby toy, those usually overpriced, but that could distract even a grown adult. And thus she was, distractedly playing with the toy as a picture was snapped without her acknowledgment, and probably sent to him without her knowing either. Her barely visible smile caught his eyes immediately. 

For the almost six months he had known her, it wasn’t a sight he got to see often, but that had been gracing his presence much more frequently now. It was beautiful. To him, it was art. Pure and soft. Bright and warm. He could watch it all day. He remembered the first time she smiled at him, in his kitchen, over snacks and laughter. Just before he had her pinned under him in the most intense lovemaking session he’d ever had.

He cursed himself. How could he turn an innocent picture into fire for his wet dreams? But how could he stop thinking of the soft skin of her neck, almost the focus of that picture, when it was exposed right there just for him to see? How could he stop his mind from wandering when it had been so long he had been with anyone? When he had been with her.

Only a few touches brought him his high, spilling all over his wall like a firetruck. Gosh, he hasn’t fucked anyone in so long it was almost pittyful. Feeling himself grow soft, he sunk himself in the water again, washing his face ferociously to wash the shame away. He wasn’t religious, but he prayed he could keep you out of his mind. He couldn’t keep doing it. Things had changed. It wasn’t appropriate. Fuck.

He walked to his bedroom with only a towel wrapped around his waist. Straight to his closet where, after a few minutes of searching, he found the new pair of sweatpants he had gotten. Gray like all others he owned. Putting it on, he returned to the kitchen, threw himself on the sofa, and prayed, while watching the darkened ceiling, that he could keep her out of his mind.

Soon closing his eyes, the darkness and the tiredness sank him into sleep. Letting go of lights and noises coming from the outside, he allowed the quietness to embrace him. However, his peace didn’t last long.

Underneath him, he felt the incessant vibrations of his phone, even if he couldn’t seem to find the device anywhere. It was just as the phone had stopped that he found it hidden between the pillows, and he unlocked the screen to a scary surprise. 

Yn 6 Missed Calls

“What the fuck!” he screamed out loud, worry slowly creeping up his chest, weighing it down and making it hard to breathe. 

She didn’t call him. Never. Not one single time. He was the one to always call and message to check if she was okay, or to start any conversation. Something must have happened, and going by the sheer number of times she had tried to contact him, it wasn’t good. Quickly unlocking his phone, he typed on the notification, calling Yn back straight away. She didn’t take long to pick up.

“Yn, what happened?” he questioned as soon as she picked up.

“Oh, thank god!” He heard from the other line, but the voice wasn’t hers. “Jason, It’s Vanessa here. Nessie. Yn’s friend.”

“H-hi, Vanessa,” he greeted through his wavering voice. “What happened? Where’s Yn?” he inquired. He wasn’t only met with silence from the other line, although Vanessa’s tense breathing indicated she was still on the call. With a demanding voice, he asked one more time, “Vanessa?”

“Jason…” She took a deep breath. “Yn is gone.”

It felt as if a heavy weight pulled his heart down, as it dropped lower than it ever had. Yet, his mind was empty, none of Vanessa’s words making sense to him. Yn was gone. Gone where? Why? Where was gone? He had so many questions, yet only once made it out of his lips.

“What?!” his voice faltered.

“She’s gone. I don’t know where to.” Vanessa’s voice too was shaky, and seemed to be holding back tears from falling down. “I heard everything through the walls but I was too afraid to go out and find him, because he scares the shit out of me. He’s really huge, you know, he could easily knock me down if I tried to help her,” Vanessa was rambling, and he could hear her incessant steps, as if she couldn’t keep herself still. “And they were fast too, by the time I got the courage to come out they were already gone, and…”

“Vanessa, calm down,” he requested, already fishing for a t-shirt and shoes from his bedroom. Whatever it was she was trying to tell him, it was worrying. Had someone taken her? Why?

“ ’m sorry. I-I just… I got her phone by accident. She accidentally left me with it when she handed me her shopping bags. So I’ve tried calling you ever since.” 

“Are you at home?” he asked and got a hum in responde. “I’m coming over, okay? I’ll be there in a second. But who took her, Nessie, please. Who was it?”

“No one took her,” she started to explain, pausing for what sounded to be a glass of water. Jason too prepared a glass before he left. “Her dad kicked her out. He found out she was pregnant.”

“He did what?!” he nearly screamed on the line, blood beginning to boil. He hadn’t heard much about her parents, but taking by how shaken about the pregnancy at first, he had no doubts they were partially responsible for her nervousness.

“He found out she was pregnant and kicked her out of her apartment,” she repeated. “Well, technically it’s his apartment, he pays for ever- But it doesn’t matter now. She’s gone and we have to find her! She was crying, a lot, and she left with only a backpack and a small suitcase. She can’t have taken much…”

“And it’s going to rain,” Jason added, already sitting in his car after flying down his building’s stairs. It wasn’t just rain, but a storm. She can’t be out in a weather like that, I have to find her. “Wait for me downstairs. I’ll be in front of your apartment in just a minute. I promise we’ll find her.”

“Vanessa!” he screamed at the girl standing on the sidewalk, looking left and right before turning to face the voice that had just called her. Jason had parked by the entrance of the building, fancy enough to have its own doorman and a beautifully decorated lobby behind its glass front doors. “How are you? Have you got any news?”

“I’m fine. At least trying to. And no news of her yet. I tried looking up and down the street, but she’s not around here anymore.” She looked at him apologetic, eyes now evidently holding back a pool of tears.

“She can’t have gone far. She was walking, right?” he asked, looking around at the still fast moving traffic on that grim Saturday night. The sky was starless, and heavy clouds filled it instead.

 “I’m so sorry, Jason,” Vanessa apologized, making him turn. Her chin trembled as her tears fell from her brown eyes. “I heard it all and couldn’t do anything. I’m so, so sorry.”

“Hey, Nessie,” he tried to soothe her, calling her by the familiar nickname he so often heard coming off Yn’s lips, and wrapping her in a friendly hug. “It’s not your fault. There wasn’t much you could do. But, please, tell me everything that happened. I’m still trying to understand it.”

Breaking off from his hug, Nessie ran her hands up and down her arms in search of warmth before looking up to meet Jason’s eyes. “Her dad is an asshole.” Oh really?, he thought. “We were coming back from the mall, you know. I sent you the picture while we were there.” He nodded. “When we arrived back her door was open, and it usually means that her parents are around. So she shoved me all of her bags before her mother could snoop in and claimed they were for my cousin’s baby shower. Before I knew it, there was screaming outside and when I went to look, her mother was weirdly pacing around and Yn and her dad were nowhere to be found.

“I thought of running down the stairs, but the elevator was already on the ground floor and I knew I couldn’t make it on time. So I just looked down the window and saw him pushing her into the streets. Her bags as well. I couldn’t understand what he said, but he was still screaming at her. Jason,” she called him, but his attention hadn’t gone anywhere. “She looked so scared, even from that far. I could see her crying, on the floor, and walking down the street. I heard movement, so I hid back in my apartment. I even heard a knock on my door, but I was too scared to open and just started calling you.”

Jason’s rage slowly grew as Vanessa continued her story. How could anyone treat family like that? He couldn’t picture treating his mother, father, or any of his siblings like that. And he specially could never imagine doing something similar to his own daughter. Whoever that man was, he wasn’t a father. He was a fucking monster he wanted to beat up so bad…

“Since she moved here for college he keeps trying to take her back to their hometown, because he says Gotham is a corrupt city and that it will “corrupt” his “baby” daughter,” Vanessa continued her story. “From what she told me, they frequent this church, and he’s seen as this “model citizen”. A joke, let me tell you. He was always controlling of her and her sisters, and they couldn’t ever walk out of line or it would ruin it for him, whatever he meant.

“I’m not sure if it’s up to me to tell you this, but it's not the first time he kicked a daughter out of home. He found out her sister kissed another girl at a party and threw her out. I guess having an unmarried pregnant daughter does the same to him and he kicked Yn too.

“I swear,” Jason ran a hand on his face. “I can kill this man.”

“Get in line. Although I do think you have more chances than me,” she tried to joke and Jason let out a dry laugh. He really could kill that man. With every single word from Vanessa, he only got worse.

A few drops of water hit his head, announcing the rain he eagerly waited for earlier was about to start. “We have to go before the rain gets heavier. She can’t be on the streets in a fucking storm.”

“I called a friend to help us look for her. He’s just by the corner. We can split up and find her quicker,” Nessie informed, waving her hand at a car that parked just before the two of them. She fixed her belt in the passenger seat while Jason rested his forearms on the window.

“You go down the street and look for her south. I’ll go north and look for her there. Nessie, please call me if you…”  he instructed the guy when exalted voices caught his attention. Coming out of the glass doors of the modern apartment complex, a large man and his wife walked out of the building in a loud exchange, aiming for the taxi that had parked just behind Nessie’s friend black SUV. “Is that him?”

The sudden change in his tone frightened Vanessa, and she stood quiet for a while until she responded with quite uncertainty, “Y-yeah.”

In that moment, Jason’s knuckles turned white from how hard he gripped on the car’s window, and his face turned a bright shade of red. Letting go of the car, Vanessa’s scream wasn’t enough to stop him from stomping in the pair’s direction, not even her repeated attempts to hold at his wrist. He shook her hold easily, legs moving fast as he eyes were set on the man responsible for all of this.

Jason exhaled a trembling breath through his nose, and he could hear his own heart thumping in his chest. His arms hung as hard as stone to his sides, and his nails dug deep into the skin of his palms. There were a few blurry sports in his sight, and his eyes burned with anger. He was seeing red, both figuratively and literally, as the neon lights of a store close by shone brightly in shades of scarlet, painting the man’s frame in its bright colors.

The large frame of the man was closer. The bald spot in his head, now much more visible. He didn’t know the man’s name, nor how looked. They never shared a word, or even a glimpse at each other. But Jason knew, oh he knew, that he would never, ever again, let him step a foot close to his girl. He would never treat you like he did, and he would pay for it even if it came little by little. 

That man would never get close to his child and its mother, and he would make sure he remembered his name. Or the feel of his punch.

“Hey!” Jason called him with a loud growl. The old man turned in his direction immediately, unaware of the fist flying into his face.

The man all but fell to the ground with a loud thud, as his wife screamed in despair. His rage not vanishing after he knocked the man down, Jason climbed on top of him, throwing punches left and right to the man’s face and stomach, until he felt his hands aching and he was pulled away from him by two pairs of strong arms.

“Stop! Jason, let go!” Vanessa screamed as he squirmed in the two men’s arms, wanting to go back to the man who failed to sit up while his wife cleared his bloody lips.

“Get over it, mate. Let’s find her,” said Vanessa’s friend, and just then he let it go.

His hand shook as he held the steering wheel. Knuckles bloodied and in throbbing pain. He still drowned in adrenaline from the well beat up he gave Yn’s excuse of a father. Vanessa’s friend, Dale, had followed him to the car to make sure he was alright to drive, but Jason assured him he was fine. The man got what he deserved, and Jason was glad he was the one to deliver it.

Alone in his car, however, he could finally allow his emotions to come out. As he drove up the opposite direction of Dale’s car, a loud scream left his lungs. Pure rage evaded his body, as his eyes burned with tears he hardly fought against. 

Why is it that when it comes to us it is always so messy? Why can’t we catch a break?, he thought. From day one, everything with you was confusing, borderline stressful most of the time. He wanted better, quieter and more peaceful days. If he was having a hard time with all that is happening, he couldn't fathom how she’d be doing right now. And the baby. It certainly wasn’t healthy for the baby.

The lights became blurry as he tried to wipe the tears away, and he had to slow down his car to not cause any unwanted accidents. With the lower speed, he could more carefully watch the sidewalks, the remaining open stores, and street corners, all looking for any sign of her. At a traffic light, red made him stop, and his eyes roamed his surroundings.

However, the blinking lights of a ‘C’ were what trapped his attention. It was a clinic. An abortion clinic. He had to swallow dry as he tried to watch its inside through the glass door. The mere idea of Yn going by it making his heart drop. If that idea ever crossed her mind, he didn’t know, but he prayed it never did. He grew attached to it too quickly. To the baby, and to her. He’d been planning, purchasing, painting and drawing a future in his head, where the two of them would be a part of. He wasn’t sure he could let it go.

When the lights turned green, his foot pressed hard on the throttle, speeding out of there before he got even more nauseous. One street turned into another, and another, and another. Still not a sign that you were around. He was growing more and more desperate as the rain got heavier and heavier. If his hands weren’t hard glued to the steering wheel, they’d be trembling tremendously. It had been long since he’d felt like this. Alone, lost and desperate. A sense there wasn’t much else he could do, and that all he did didn’t seem to work. And as every single second passed without you there by his side, his anxiety  multiplied by millions.

The rain now poured, as if the sky was about to fall down. People rushed around, their umbrellas doing nothing to shield them from the water, and coats and jackets getting drenched as they looked for shelter. He was driving desperately, looking for anything, any sign, any indication that you were safe. He checked his phone for messages from Vanessa, or a call from his brothers he had begged for help.

Dick had called his colleagues, giving them Yn’s description, asking them to keep an eye out. Tim and Stephanie were looking for you in every camera they would hack in the city, and Damian was probably begging rats and insects to lead him Yn’s way.

A lighting strike hit the ground and illuminated the sky. And then he saw it.

Hidden in the darkened entrance of a now closed store, sat on the floor, curled down in a corner, was a girl. A bright orange suitcase laying beside her, a blue backpack resting on her side, as she had her face shoved between her knees. Shaking, from cold and tears. A girl that couldn’t be anyone but you. 

He stopped the car without thinking. Without caring if there was anyone behind him on the road. He just wanted to get to you. Stepping out, he felt the rain soak his head and his shirt, but he didn’t care. All he cared about was that he’d found you. Shouting into Gotham’s dark and gloomy night, he called her name and rushed to your side.

Her head bobbed up as quickly as he ran, and it searched around for the voice was coming from. When she realized it was him, she pulled herself up from the floor swiftly and into Jason’s arms, tangling her own around his waist and letting her face fall into his chest. Her tears soaked his shirt quicker than rain had done, and she shook in his hold and her loud sobs filled Jason’s ears.

His heart broke in one million pieces. The sight of her crying once again, too much for him to handle. He couldn’t even care for the harsh way in which she had slammed against his body, he was just glad you were there. Safe and in his arms. Thus, he held closer and tight, one hand caressing her nape and he left soft kisses at her temples. 

“Hey, hey,” he cooed. “I’m here, okay? I’m here. You don’t need to cry anymore.”

Vanessa and Dale didn’t take long to arrive, but Yn didn’t stop crying even after they arrived there. The two girls, tangled in a tight embrace, cried on each other’s shoulders and the rain dropped as heavy as their tears did. Jason, on the other hand, tried to dry his eyes without anyone noticing, wiping the sleeve of his shirt on his face and turning away.

“You gave that man a good punch out there,” Dale’s raspy voice began by his side, bringing his attention away from the walls. “I would’ve done just about the same if it was my girl who was kicked out like that. Your girl should be happy she has you.” He tapped Jason’s shoulder, that way boys always do, and Jason let out a chuckle.

His girl. Yn was as much his girl as he owned the moon, and yet, he couldn’t make himself correct him.

“I just hope she will be fine.”

“I’ve heard she’s a strong one,” she chimed.

“Yeah!” he agreed with a smile. “My girl really is.”

Watching the two girls, he noticed Vanessa wipe Yn’s tears away, pushing her away then bringing her back into another hug that made Yn give out a teary laugh. She seemed to have calmed down, as no more tears ran down frenetically down her cheeks and her breathing seemed to have eased. Jason, then, decided to walk closer, with the other man trailing just behind. Yn soon took notice, as she gave him a smile as he approached.

“Are you gonna be fine?” Vanessa asked, rubbing a hand over her arm.

“I don’t know,” Yn answered. Her voice was weak, hoarse and fragile. “I don’t have anywhere to go.”

Jason noticed her chin restart to tremble, and he was about to hug her again if Vanessa wasn’t closer and quicker. Over her friend’s shoulder, Yn’s teary eyes caught his, staring at him sadly. Pulling away from the hug, Vanessa made an offer.

“I can make some space in my apartment for you. It isn’t big but I guess I make it fit, right?”

Giving her friend a soft smile, Yn appeared to agree.

“No!” Jason protested, louder than he had hoped. “I have a spare room. I was planning on fixing it for our baby, but you can stay there. It’s yours. Besides, it would be more practical,” he explained. “I can easily take you to appointments, or even for work. I wouldn’t mind. And when the baby arrives, I can help you with taking care of it.”

He eyed Yn hopefully. “C’mon. I’m the baby’s dad. I wouldn’t be right if I didn’t help you out.”

“I just don’t wanna be a bother,” Yn said.

“Yn, you could never bother me,” he stated.

Staring at her, Jason waited expectantly. He knew she was weighing every option and considering every mild detail. But he just wanted her to say yes. He wanted to have her near. It wasn’t just convenient, it was necessary. To him it was. To have her close meant to always know if her and the baby were alright, safe and taken care of. He wouldn’t worry if she had arrived home, or if she had gotten sick at work. He would know. Because he would be there.

Yn took her time thinking, while Jason agonized in his spot. He had built too much hope in such a short amount of time, he was scared of how he would be if she didn’t accept his proposal. After all, he was just the stranger she was having a baby with, not her best friend. But a response came out, eventually. Nodding shortly, Yn offered him a smile and a watery stare. A stare that said everything she didn’t need to voice, but that he caught anyway. Thank you.

“I’ll miss my neighbor,” Vanessa cried out, and hugged Yn tightly by her side.

“I’ll miss you too, nugget,” Yn returned. “But I’m sure Jason won’t forbid you from visiting me.”

“Would I even have the chance to?” Jason asked playfully.

“No!” they replied in unison, bringing out laughter out of the four of them. Even though the rain progressively got worse, finally, the mood had lightened.

Vanessa offered her jacket so Yn could get in the car without getting wet, and Jason was about to take her bags when Dale stopped him before he moved. “Take care of your girl, I’ll take the bags.”

Nodding in gratitude, Jason instead moved to your side. “Did you manage to get a lot? I mean, out of your apartment. Into your bags?”

Yn only shook her head.

“I can ask Mr. Emmons for the spare key and pick up some of your stuff,” Vanessa said, walking beside her. “He loved you, I’m sure he’d make that exception for you.”

“Are you sure?” Yn asked. “I really don’t wanna bother anyo…”

“Yn!” Jason and Vanessa scolded in unison.

“I’m sorry,” Yn let out a soft laugh. “If you want to, I won’t complain.”

It was past midnight when both Vanessa and Dale left Jason’s apartment. With them, four trash bags full of Yn’s stuff were brought in, and thus started Yn’s moving process. The girls worked on taking notes of everything that had come in the bags, and of everything there was missing. Vanessa was going to play dealer for a few days, and weirdly, she was very excited for it.

While they worked on the bags, Jason and Dale took a look at the spare bedroom. It was nearly empty, except from a few gym items and boxes laying around. With the other’s help, Jason cleared out the room, sweeping the floors and the spider webs off the walls. Also, he made a promise to find her a bed, somewhere. No one cared enough for dinner that night, and the pair left as nonchalantly as they had arrived.

“You can stay in my bedroom tonight. I’ll take the sofa,” Jason explained, once the two of them were alone. “At least until I can get you a bed.”

“It’s okay,” Yn reassured, and left him alone to take a shower.

While she readied to go to bed, Jason made sure he picked up everything he would need to sleep in the living room out of his bedroom. He didn’t want to bother her by coming in and out of it while she was there. He knew she was going to be uncomfortable enough for today, this new arrangement requiring time to get used to. So, he changed into comfortable clothes, prepped his makeshift bed with pillows and blankets, and waited for her to come out of her shower.

The faint water noises coming from the bathroom mixed with the storm sound coming from outside, creating a relaxing atmosphere he was grateful for after all the stress he’d gone through. He could only hope Yn felt as calm as he did now, that she wasn’t hiding any tears from him in her shower. But he knew it was asking for too much, she was not going to get over it this easily. She had cried a lot in the car ride to his apartment, and when he passed by the bathroom door he could hear her sniffles.

It killed him to see her like that. He’d do just about anything to make her stop hurting. Sat on the sofa, he thought about everything in his reach he could possibly attempt to do to ease her pain, but none of them were possible this late at night. However, as soon as the door opened and Yn came out, her hair wet and fresh smell spreading through the whole apartment, his thoughts emptied out to just her.

“I guess I’m going to bed now,” she shyly stated. Jason simply nodded, too stunned with how she looked in just a plain t-shirt and pajama shorts to form any coherent sentence. “Goodnight, Jay.”

“Good night, Ynie,” was all he said as he watched her close his bedroom door behind her.

“And Jay,” she suddenly reopened the door calling out for him. “Thank you for letting me stay here.”

Her soft smile was genuine, adorable, and made his stomach spin. In normal circumstances, he’d have told her she didn’t need to thank him for anything. Tonight, though, he didn’t want to argue.

“You’re welcome,” he offered her a gentle grin. But I’d make this your home even if you had yours.

Upon his return to solitude, he hoped the sounds of the night would lull him to sleep. He was tired, and on any other night he’d have dozed off easily. However, tonight wasn’t the case. Even if he closed his eyes, even if he was curled up comfortably, he couldn’t seem to fall asleep. He continuously rolled and rolled until he got tired of trying. So he fished for the remote in the total darkness of the room, and turned on the TV, the volume on the lowest, to see if anything in there could make him sleepy.

He had found a cartoon. One of those late night, highly inappropriate ones, and actually found it to be mildly entertaining. But the creaking sound of the door was more interesting. Lifting his head slowly to look over the back of the sofa, he found Yn peeking out of his bedroom.

“Can’t fall asleep?” he asked, and she just nodded. “Come here.”

Sitting up, he made some space for her to sit  beside him, making sure he left her with the softest pillows. Adorably, she sat down and immediately pulled her legs up to her chest, hugging it protectively, and resting her chin on her own knees.

“What are you watching?” she asked.

“I don’t know,” he answered honestly. However, his attention was now far gone from the TV. “I just put it on to distract me. See if I could fall asleep to it.”

Moments of silence followed. Yn’s focus on the cartoon, while Jason was fixed watching her. She looked so serene, it didn’t even look like she had just been kicked out by her own father. He wanted to ask her if she was alright, but he feared she would get mad with how much he had asked it since they’d arrived home. He also wanted to hug her, feel the comfort of her warmth and maybe fall asleep to it, but he knew it would be too much for one single day. So, he was content with the light brushes he’d get on her skin.

“Nessie told me what you did to my dad,” she said suddenly, and Jason got nervous about what she thought of it. It was still her dad, even with all the pain he had caused. He was afraid she’d be mad at him for it. So, he had to explain himself.

“He deserved it,” he quickly added. His throat was dry, but he still insisted. “He deserved it for what he did to you. I could not…”

“I get it,” she broke him off. “It just… feels weird. I’m glad you did, but also not.”

He understood.

“I was mad at him at some point, and thought of doing it myself. But he is my dad. I don’t think I could do it if it ever came to it. Even if I collected all the anger I harvested throughout my entire life, I couldn’t lift a finger against him.”

Her head moved, now facing him with her cheek laid on her legs. Her eyes were intense, but sad. Glowing, but it wasn’t happiness.

“I get it,” he told her. “I really do.” And he continued to look at her till it gave him courage to finally ask. “Was he this bad your whole life?”

She shook her head. “He had his good moments. Few, but they were there. We just had to be doing something he’d actually be happy about.”

“He’d always make us take the classes he wanted. Go to places where he liked to go, and where his ‘friend’ could see him, you know, boast about how great his family was. Even our friends he got to pick. They had to be from church, and from rich families. People we could fawn over, grow attached to like vines. I guess he thought if we were friends with them, he would become friends with the parents, and what better than rich friends for you to parasite, right?

“I don’t even know how he let me come to Gotham in the first place. He made my sister marry young so she wouldn’t go away for college, so I don’t know how he didn’t try that on me too. I mean, he did try, but none of the guys were actually interested in pursuing me for him to insist on it… What?” he questioned when she heard him scoff.

“Why wouldn’t they be interested in you?” he let out before he knew it. Yn shyly hid her face from him before continuing.

“I kinda looked mad all the time.”

“Oh, really,” Jason mused, earning a slap on his bicep.

“I was just… an angry teenager,” he gave her a look. “And young adult too, okay?” she let out a brief laugh. “I don’t know why, I just was. Am. I don’t know. They were just always up my ass, and I guess it got me riled up. I could talk back to them, he might have killed me if I did. So I just… I just…”

“Stocked up with anger?” he finished for her.

“Yeah, I stocked up with anger. And didn’t know where to let it out,” she said, and went quiet for a while. “Was your family as insane as mine?”

“Sorta,” he scoffed. “They are wild, but not bad.”

He didn’t want to talk much, but she looked at him curiously. Almost begging him to talk.

“I was adopted when I was nine. My father had already adopted my older brother, and after me he got Tim, Steph and Cass, and then he found out he had a biological son that is just like him and annoying as shit. I’ll tell you, Damian is a lot. He adopted a cow and just told Bruce to deal with it. Kid is insane. ”

The girl looked at him baffled. A cow? Where would a middle class kid raise a cow in Gotham?

“That sounds… fun,” she gave him a big smile.

“Really?” he wondered.

“My family never did anything out of the ordinary,” she stated.

“My family doesn’t know what ordinary means,” he joked. The two of them laughed, TV show long ignored. Jason never forgot how, when she wanted it, her company could be so pleasant. He felt like she really listened to him, that she didn’t think his takes or stories were just a joke or meaningless. He actually enjoyed having her around, and hoped moments like this would become more frequent with her habiting the same place as him.

“You know,” he found the confidence to start speaking again. “I lied to you… That day at the doctor.”

Yn eyebrows frowned in a questioning look, and so, Jason continued. “I… My birth parents. I know who they are.” 

He felt guilty that day. For lying so blatantly. But it was something too personal for him, something he hadn’t shared with many. It was a part of his life that still hurt him, even if years had passed, and he had finally gotten a new family. He wasn’t ready to share it then, not in front of a doctor, a total stranger. And he knew the risks of his lie. He was omitting important information for his baby’s health and future, but he wasn’t ready.  In fact, he didn’t even know he was ready now. But Yn had been so honest, so open about that part of her life, one he knew now caused her much pain, that he felt the need to offer something back.

It was Yn’s soft hum that broke him from his thoughts and made him continue. “They were addicts. Very poor. I know they did the best the could to raise me, but their addiction was unstoppable. My dad started working with bad people to put food on the table. Last time I checked on him he was in jail. Might as well be dead by now, I haven’t cared to look him up.” His voice came out low, timid. A lump tightened his throat, making it hard for him to speak, but he still insisted. “My mom… She passed away. I’m not sure if it was the drugs, or if she got sick. I just remember her looking really bad.

“I was on the streets for a while, stealing tires and other things, when my father found me. He took me home, gave me food, and I haven’t left there ever since. I mean, I have my own home now, and life wasn’t easy there either, but they still are everything I have. I guess that’s why I grew attached to you so fast… I-I mean, the baby. The idea of the baby. I think I just wanted to have something that is really mine, that I can say I was the one to build and care for. My own family. I just got excited, you know. Let me show you something.”

Avoiding the tears by a millisecond, Jason stood up from his place and went to his closet. There, in the same place he had left it ever since he had bought it, he took the deep brown romper, with cute little ears and an even cuter fluffy tail. He saw it just a few days after Yn came to his apartment with the news he was going to be a dad, just as the idea started to settle in. He hadn’t told his brother, nor his father. The idea just lingering in his head, and once he found it on-line, he had to get it. He proudly got his baby’s first outfit on a whim. But it was too perfect to let it pass, and it was on sale too. It must have been a sign.

Walking fast back to the living room, he dropped at her side on the bouncy cushion. “I got this on-line I think two weeks ago. I thought it was adorable and I just needed to have it. I saw so many babies wearing those on the internet that I couldn’t stop picturing my own baby in one of them. Strolling around, you know. Stumbling on his, or hers, steps, or crawling around in it. Like an actual bear,” he let out a laugh, admiring the garment in his hand.

When he turned to look at Yn, though, he found her eyes watery. Her chin trembled as she bit her bottom lip, an attempt at making it stop. Jason wondered if he had said something wrong. If he had hurt her unknowingly. His own heart started to beat like crazy, bleeding pain upon her painful expression. “Yn? Did I say something wrong?”

“No!”, she cut him before he could finish. She dried her eyes with her hand and continued, “I’m just tired. It’s been a long day, Jay. I’m gonna head to bed.”

Placing a quick peck on his cheek, she might as well have run back to the bedroom.  Her sniffles, barely audible. She left him alone, to his own torturing thoughts of what he might’ve just done to make her react like this. Or was it just the hormones? Did pregnant women just act like this? 

No matter the answer, he stood in the darkness of the night and in the coldness of the rain. But the lingering burn of her kiss on his skin kept him warm, and could finally sleep soundly.

Sunday was quiet, and Nessie had spent the whole day by your side. Not much talking happened between you, her, or Jason. You just hung around, in silent company.

Jason, somehow, had gotten you a bed, and he and Dale, who had stopped by per Nessie’s request, built it in an instant. The room that was now to be yours wasn’t large, but it was enough. You had to learn to leave with enough now. Jason told you he would help you decorate as you wished, even though he had just painted the walls white in expectation of the baby’s gender. He sounded like he was full of ideas for a nursery, excitedly talking about items he had seen on-line or at stores. Nessie joked he might be the one nesting, and not you.

She left early this time, and your dinner with Jason was shared in silence. The two of them had tried to convince you to call in sick at work on Monday, to try to relax a bit more. Let your new reality sink in. But you knew you couldn’t. Sandra needed you, and you needed the distraction.

When morning came, the sun rays hit you straight in the face, the lack of curtains allowing the room to be bright and warm even if it was still early. You came out still in your pajamas, and immediately the smell of food filled your nose. The past few weeks of your pregnancy made you slightly wary of the smell’s potential to make you sick, but it was impossible to deny it smelled good and tasty.

“Good morning,” Jason greeted with a beaming smile. He seemed to be ready to head out to work. “I made you some breakfast. I’ve already eaten.”

“You got me feeling like a baby with all this food and stuff,” you commented. But it was true, he had been doing just about everything to make you feel comfortable and at home in his apartment.

“Hey! You are a baby,” he stated, and you scoffed. “At least while you don’t deliver my baby, you’re baby.”

You rolled your eyes at him, unable to hold back a smile. “Anyway, I have to go now. Are you really going to work today?” he asked. You just nodded. “Okay…” he breathed out. “If you need anything. And I mean, anything, don’t hesitate to call me. I’ll be ready to answer you whenever.”

“You don’t have to worry, Jay,” you started, but one notification from your phone stole your attention briefly. “I’ll be alright. I promise.”

Jason looked at you as if he didn’t believe your words. His deep blue eyes boring into yours as if he tried to catch your lie in them. With a deep and long exhale, he accepted, or at least he pretended, that you would be fine without him. “Still, call me, okay?”

“I will,” you promised. “But I don’t think I’ll need to.”

Sitting on the island stool, you took a look at the meal he had prepared you. It really did look as delicious as it smelled. But you suddenly weren’t hungry.

You watched him pick up his bags, put on his shoes and leave. The guilt eating at your chest the entire time. He waved you goodbye with a large grin, happy to be starting his week it seemed. Yet, this morning, you struggled. You couldn’t bring yourself to eat with the notification staring right at you. A memory of your darkest hour.

Picking up your phone, you read it one more time.

Clinic girl Are you still going to schedule your abortion appointment?

It still stung as strong as it did minutes ago, when you first saw it on your screen. Your mind battled with the idea, even though you knew your answer very well. The smell of the food suddenly was making you sick, and your appetite, by this point, had completely vanished. Rubbing at your temples, you decided on putting an end to it.

You It won’t be necessary.

Putting your phone away, you got up to change. And you changed quickly, just like your life had done. Quick and sharp like an arrow, or an assassin’s blade. Changing everything in its course. Soon, you were closing the apartment’s door behind you, taking one last glimpse of what your life had become. Of what your future was going to be. You and him. Your baby soon to come in.

.

.

tag list: @igotanidea ; @acornacreacure ; @amberpanda99 ; @capswife ; @erochuu ; @fairyeoll ; @gone-batty-fics ; @ichi-matsu-san ; @jasontoddslover ; @jaysgirlx ; @jkvolgs ; @just-lost-inbetween-worlds ; @killxz ; @kysrion ; @lacunaanonymoused ; @loonymoonystuff ; @lothiriel9 ; @marsbars09 ; @munimunni ; @novs9011 ; @spideytingley ; @starcrossedtrek ; @strawberryforks ; @sttrawberries ; @vanillaattack ; @veryfabday ; @vissavin ; @xxsweetnlowxx ; @willieoo ; @wordsfromshona ;

[bingwriterxo]

I have so many thoughts on this new chapter!! But I’ll try to get them all down. I freakin adored getting a preview of nervous Tara 😂😂 I think Sam noticed how nervous she was and how serious Tara is about reader. The “hey pretty girl” reader lets out when Tara opened the door….my gay heart literally started beating so hard…get any pretty girl saying that to me and I’d pretty much just die on the spot. Not reader bringing a wine from FRANCE….as a person who adores fine art and Shakespeare READER is the dream girl!

I don’t know why but when readers talks about her family history and all the passion they hold for literature it just makes my heart warm. Chad almost dying when reader said she could get him to meet the football couch killed me. I wasn’t sure how you were going to I corporate Tara and her trauma with gf into it, but I have to say I am far from disappointed. The way I gasped and nearly dropped my phone when reader was like “tell me what?”

the way reader just plopped on Tara’s bed has my heart, girly is already completely comfortable with bed Tara bear😂 ok…now for the serious part of the chapter. The nitty gritty.

I too also have to piggyback on the anon that talked about the emotional maturity of reader. It’s not easy hearing about your girlfriend who her own girlfriend tried to kill her. I thought the way you wrote Tara describing amber was actually really well done. I love how you started with my best friend. And then my amber. It really gets across how hurt and correct me if I’m wrong…the grief that Tara still holds. The trauma is evident, and if I could I would award reader for her comforting Tara. And I love that Tara feels safe with reader enough to be vulnerable. This series brings me to much joy! I write as well so I just love reading works from my favorite authors (which is you).

now onward to reader’s family!! (If the poll allows us too) honestly I don’t mind which chapter comes next. I think there all lovely. Although I would love to see readers family Interacting with Tara (just because we already know so much about there future relationships. Golfing with readers dad, Eddie and Nathaniel just adoring Tara) all in due time!

I also want to convey my appreciation for you! Two chapters in two days! Remarkable! Can’t wait for the next. Whatever it may be. ❤️

the way I read

i love this whole analysis. makes me feel like im back in english class. now let me try to respond to all ur thoughts lol

i figured since we are reading tara’s pov, i might as well use that to my advantage, and tara being nervous is so real, i think.

R’s parents sent her the good stuff to help her impress sam 🫶 its funny i didnt realize it when i first wrote it but 1961 is my moms birth year. im just a family man what can i say

i thought it’d be fun to have R’s dad have hella connections around the world, and it was a good way to get her closer to chad! i was at first gonna write him as a jealous, whiny kinda guy, but idk…i just love chad i want them to be besties

tara is definitely still grieving over what happened in woodsboro. losing amber and the betrayal was hard for her, and R obviously realizes it, so of course she’ll be there for her, yk

there may be part 6 coming tomorrow…we’ll see. i deadass have so much free time it’s insane 🤭

[koolkat9]

But the Meeting!: Final Chapter

So...Don't know if you guys remember, but I got a couple asks awhile back requesting a FACE Fam AU where Alfred gets sick and because of his fever, he's a bit delirious and thinks he and his family are the personifications of nations. I wanted to do one final chapter (the first two can be read here) (they're also on tumblr, but I figured one link with all chapters was better than trying to fin both of the posts)

Anyway, although no one asked for a 3rd chapter, I felt I needed a proper finish for it.

Original Prompt:  I wish you would write a fic where in a human face fam au Alfred is sick with a high fever. He keeps trying to get out of bed because “Germany will kill me if I miss another meeting” and generally refers to everyone and himself as if they were countries. Idk I think it might be cute

Rating: T

Relationship: FACE Family

Word Count: 452

Arthur knocked on the door, thermometer and cool cloth in hand. “Al–I mean–America, can I come in?” He cringed slightly at the name, but he didn’t need to have another disagreement with his delirious son. 

“Yes,” came the raspy reply. 

Arthur opened the door and was relieved to see Alfred was still in bed, cuddled with a pillow. The poor dear’s cheeks were flushed and his eyes glassy. “Hey love. I’ve got something to get your fever down. But I need to take your temperature.”

Luckily, Alfred was compliant and opened his mouth. Bordering 40 degrees celsius, they’d have to keep an eye on him to make sure it didn’t get any higher. 

“Is it bad…?”

“With some medication, fluids and a cold cloth, I’m sure you’ll be just fine. Oh and rest! That’s the most important.”

“Okay…”

There was another soft knock at the door. 

“Come in,” Arthur called. 

Francis pushed the door open, a glass of water and a plate of toast. “I’ve made you a light breakfast mon chouchou.” He handed Alfred the glass and placed the toast on the bedside table. “How are you feeling?”

“Crappy,” Alfred whined, burying his face into his pillow. 

“Drink,” Arthur ordered, though his voice remained soft and gentle.

Alfred pouted but complied, sitting up and taking small sips from the glass. He laid back down when he had enough.  

Francis ruffled his son’s hair. “Well I’ll go bring Matt–”

Alfred quirked a brow.  

“I mean…Canada. We have to head out…uh…Just rest darling.” He kissed Alfred’s brow and his husband’s lips before rushing out of the room. 

“Aren’t you going too?” Alfred asked.

“No, someone needs to keep an eye on you.”

“I’m independent though! I can take care of my–” Alfred broke out into a hacking fit.

Acting quickly, Arthur grabbed the glass of water and handed it to Alfred. He patted the boy’s back as Alfred took careful sips. Eventually, the coughing calmed down. 

“Fine,” Alfred groaned, “I guess you could stay.” 

Arthur gave him a smile, squeezing his knee. “I’ll be downstairs if you need me. I want you to rest okay?”

Alfred nodded and laid down. Arthur tucked him in and placed a kiss on his warm forehead. 

The next day Alfred’s fever broke and Matthew was sure to rub in his face all the silly stories Alfred had spewed in his delirium. Of course, Francis and Arthur intervened before things became too heated and gave Matthew a word about making fun of his ill brother (though both Francis and Arthur had to admit, the whole situation was a little funny). After a few more days of rest and fluids, Alfred was good as new, though a bit humiliated.

[nappingwithyuuji]

i ain’t got no time if you ain’t beside me.

CORPSE HUSBAND X FEM!READER

Chapter two of ???

Previous - Next

Summary: You are a faceless youtuber who does Sims4 and ranty vlogs, but somehow you end up playing a game with your friend Rae and then things get 💕💕💕.

Warnings: so far none!

As soon as you turned off your camera you instantly brought your knees up to your chest and hugged your legs tightly, trying to breath and process this last round. When you encountered Corpse kill your friend you couldn't help the shriek that left your mouth, even though as soon as it came out, you covered your mouth with your hand, biting at your palm.

Corpse didn’t even tell you to do anything, you just knew you had to keep quiet and almost instantly you two had made a silent pact. You followed him around as he successfully killed the rest of the players and you even made a few congratulatory comments like “good job!” or “omg savage!”  when he did. Meanwhile you could see your chat going crazy asking you when you had switched teams or basically poking fun at you for running around like Corpse’s puppy.

Not to mention that after you were voted out everyone in your chat started freaking out about what Corpse proceeded to do. To avenge you. As you watched him win the game while also mumbling about you, you felt your jaw slack open but you pushed through, deciding to chat about random things with your followers. You weren’t surprised when you saw that Corpse and Toast won as impostors, you even let a soft “yay” escape your mouth and then laughed incredulously about it with your chat.

Afterward you mention to the guys that this had been your last round which made them all start to boo and joke around.

“Booo Y/n! It's only 11pm!” Rae whined through your headphones. Everyone else agreed but you sighed and tried to explain yourself.

“I know! But I'm not made for gaming like you guys! I usually fall asleep by 11:30pm so I would already be in bed by now!! I'm the grandma friend!” You let out a yawn by the end of your sentence and you saw your chat start spamming you with a few of “awwww y/n is such a cutie” and “she is such a grandma.” You chuckled a bit at that but then you heard something that made your breath cut out.

“Aww, such a baby y/n.”

All in all, it was pretty fun and it was a hell of a first time playing this game. Everyone hanged out a bit and congratulated you for your first game. Rae even started to joke about how you had become a Corpse simp but that's when you decided to proceed to call it a night. Probably the best choice given your present state. You love your friend but, too soon, man, too soon. Twitter didn’t seem to agree with you on that.

Author’s note: Hi! thanks for all the love on the chapter! It really means a huge lot to me! This part might be a bit short but I feel like I gave you what you were craving for ;) Also, cute title, eh? White Tee is my favorite song from Corpse. I don't want to set myself a rigid schedule (let’s strive for weekly updates tho) for this so this is where the tag list becomes useful!  Remember that reblogs are extremely useful to me and even more so if you tag the reblogs under the same tags I use. Thx byee

Tag list is open!

Tag list: @sophiasrant, @rexit-mo, @sometimesicanwright, @socially-blue, @scorpios-echos, @gaysludge, @fairysums, @4444444-z, @bakugonua, @mishisamess, @lukewearingbeanies, @butterfly-skinnylegend​

(gonna use the tag “if you aint beside me” as this fic’s tag so maybe follow it too idk)

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 317: My Boy Was Just Like Me

Previously on BnHA: AFO randomly blew up Lady Nagant as a good reminder of why you should never make a deal with this fucking guy, smdh. Hawks was all “well if it isn’t my two best friends, Deku and Lady Nagant, both of whom I respect and love tremendously.” Everyone was all “??” and Horikoshi was all “shh... just pretend” because it was too embarrassing for him to admit that he forgot to write a couple of set-up flashbacks I guess. Anyway so Hawks got Lady to tell them where AFO was hiding out, and everyone said goodbye to her and Overhaul, who never did get to see his boss (sorry buddy, I’ll send you a vial of my tears in the mail), and headed out to a house in the woods. AFO was all “hello Deku :) :) it sure is fun making you suffer :) :) :) anyways this is a trap”, and blew up the house. Yeah, we all here are getting reaaaaaaaal tired of your shit, AFO.

Today on BnHA: The Hawksquad and Edgeplatoon meet in a warehouse and are all “what should we do about the fact that everything sucks?” Mt. Lady is all “here’s a thought, what if we tried battling AFO with more than six people.” Hawks and Endeavor are all “great initiative, but just a friendly reminder that our friends also suck and would probably betray Deku which would suck further still.” Shouto is all “ANSWER THE PHONE DAD” and Endeavor is all “[IRONICALLY DOESN’T ANSWER THE PHONE].” Meanwhile over in Sadtown, capital of Sadland Prefecture, Japan, Deku is all “All Might, as you can clearly see I am completely fine and good, never been better in fact, definitely not caught up in the throes of an epic mental breakdown which is shutting me down emotionally, anyway so on that note I would like to leave you now goodbye!!” All Might is all “[can’t actually form any words because he’s too distraught].” Fandom is all “o(╥﹏╥)o.” Horikoshi is all “(*＾-’) 乃 [pew pew finger guns and barrel rolls into the darkness].”

sweet jesus lord

this literally doesn’t even look like Deku anymore?? this looks like Dark!Deku who shows up to fight you in that one room in the Water Temple. he looks like he’s about to crawl out of my television set and murder me with his psychic powers good lord

holy shit lmao Horikoshi is really just shrugging his shoulders and resolving last week’s cliffhanger with a single line of dialogue

fire is no one’s weakness. idk what other options you’ve got, AFO, but you’re gonna have to go back to the drawing board. maybe try bees or something. I’m just saying. we’re all expecting fire at this point but nobody is expecting bees

anyway so now they’re all sitting in some warehouse somewhere chatting about it I guess. shoutout to Horikoshi for finally giving my man Edgeshot some more dialogue at long last

well, Edgeshot, to answer your question, she exploded. so naturally she’s fine

nah just kidding, Hawks says she won’t be able to help them out much because she’s recovering from being exploded. this is the part where we all ignore the fact that Hawks got set on fire for like a full ten minutes back during the War arc and was only in the hospital for a day. anyways enjoy your temporary plot hiatus Nagant

man there’s a lot of dialogue here and I’m trying to figure out where to insert commentary but it’s kinda difficult lol. basically, Edge and the others are saying that they should gather up the other remaining heroes and get them all caught up on the whole OFA situation. which, hmmmm

like on the one hand, these guys definitely aren’t going to cut it on their own, so it’s a reasonable suggestion on the face of it. but on the other hand, do we really want to entrust the OFA secret to a bunch of other people, most of whom shat the bed during the War arc to be quite frank? is it really worth the additional risk? especially given that any one of them might go spilling the beans to the public -- or worse, betray them to AFO??

also just a quick side note here, Mt. Lady’s character development never ceases to delight me. she’s become so committed to her responsibility as a hero these days, and it fucking suits her. I genuinely consider to be one of the elites now. I mean it doesn’t hurt that all the other elites are fucking dead lol but still

wait what? Death Arms retired??

Death Arms as in the guy who was too afraid of a little fire to try and save a terrified 14-year-old kid who was slowly suffocating right before his eyes?? that Death Arms???? color me surprised. shocked, I tell you

...okay but holy fuck

Death Arms. bro. my expectations for you were low but holy shit. like I’m sorry, but I don’t even have it in me to try and pretend like I feel the slightest bit of sympathy for him or Old Man Samurai or any of those other guys today. thanks for a whole lot of nothing my dude. good riddance

(ETA: so I’m rereading this the next day and realize this comes off as kind of harsh, so let me just try to clarify. it’s not the fact that he’s quitting that bothers me, to be honest. it’s the fact that he’s quitting specifically because he feels like the public is being mean to him. that’s it.

seriously. it would be one thing if he was quitting because he was scared, because now that is human. nobody wants to die, and I doubt any amount of training can ever fully prepare someone to go up against that fear. but the thing is, he never once mentions that, or talks about the danger aspect. instead, I got the distinct vibe from this speech that Death Arms is one of those people who only became a hero because of the limelight. and I just don’t have any patience for that. if all you care about are likes and subscribes then go become a fucking youtuber or some shit. nothing wrong with that! but you didn’t; you signed up to be a hero and protect these people. they gave you their respect and admiration because they trusted you to protect them. and now that they’re no longer in the mood to worship and applaud your every move on account of them being scared shitless because they’re living in the literal end times, you decide to dip. so like okay, fine then. don’t let the door hit you on the way out. anyways lol sorry for the rant.)

anyway so yeah. perfect example of why I don’t exactly have a ton of faith in most of the remaining heroes out there lol. also let me just once again give a shoutout to my best girl Mt. Lady whom I suddenly find myself appreciating all the more

“please calm down makeste. drink some water and enjoy this fresh new jeans pun” listen Horikoshi don’t tell me what to do dammit

fine. it is a nice pun, I guess

-- damn so now Endeavor’s saying that the media is already being fed info by the retired heroes. so for some of these guys it wasn’t enough for them to abandon all the people they swore to protect and to leave their fellow heroes out in the cold; they decided they might as well actively make things worse for them while they were at it, huh. like I get wanting to spill all the dirty secrets from your old job that you just quit, but this isn’t Jeff Bezos you’re screwing over, this is a sixteen-year-old kid

-- like, yes!! this, right here!!

exactly!! let’s not forget that there are already two prior instances of this happening. Endeavor arguably deserved it, but Katsuki not so much

huh. Endeavor seems to have a more optimistic outlook regarding this than I do lol

I mean, this is the same public that didn’t hesitant to blame a kidnapped child for his own kidnapping, and then later on for being the downfall of the Symbol of Peace. but okay then

anyway so blah blah blah, more talk about how they need to use Deku as bait, which basically puts them back at square one, and then they’re all just trailing off into silence and sitting around in the dark lmao this is getting very depressing

SKDJFLSDKJ:LFKJ

SHOUTO?????

NOOOOOOOO ARE YOU KIDDING ME

OH HOW THE TURNTABLES OMG. THE GHOSTER HAS BECOME THE GHOSTEE. Endeavor you petty son of a bitch. and what a brutal cut to that flashback too. “let’s stop Touya together” nah Shouto I’ve got a better idea why don’t I abandon you in U.A. and sally off with Hawks and Jeanist to found the “let’s pretend like we’re doing something to help Deku” club, which basically consists of us sitting around making terrible decisions all day long

Shouto, honey. you deserve better my little Coca Cola can. .........but if you really do have something important you need to tell your dad you could just text it to him. all the love and support, hugs and kisses, you’re doing amazing sweetie. but if you need to pass on any vital information you can just write it down and hit send honey that’s all I’m saying love

now he’s getting another call?? -- or, no, Hawks is getting a call from All Might

ARE YOU FOR REAL HAWKS OMFG

so while you all were sitting around talking about how useless you are, the kid you’re supposed to be protecting was battling another hired gun. I see. please pardon me for one second, I have a phone call to make. the phone call is to RockLockRock and Manual. the reason for the call is to apologize for calling them the worst bodyguards ever back during the War arc. the reason for the apology is because it turns out I WAS SEVERELY MISTAKEN OMFG

JESUS CHRIST DEKU DID YOU JUST KILL THIS MAN LMAO

shoutout to Horikoshi for offscreening this fight. we get it, lol. Deku strong and scary, villains ineffectual and feeble, and AFO... [checks notes] yep, still a dick. the angst arc continues

-- the angst arc continues, SIR

jesus christ I may have to rethink all of my opinions about Deku being framed for murder in movie 3 lmao. never mind. he did it, your honor

holy fucking shit Deku. “he might blow up, so please be careful” fdlskjflk jlskdjflk lwkejflk anyway so I’ve decided the explosion running gag can stay, actually

DEKU WAIT YOU FORGOT YOUR LUNCH!!

lol why do I get the feeling some serious shit is about to go down. ALL MIGHT NEVER MIND BACK OFF I THINK HE NEEDS HIS SPACE

OH MY FUCK I GASPED OUT LOUD

NO NO NO. I KNEW THIS WAS COMING GODDAMMIT BUT NO. NEVER MIND, I CHANGED MY MIND ABOUT IT, I’M NOT READY TO CRY TODAY

shit. shit shit shit shit and OF COURSE all I can fucking think about is that stupid fucking prophecy and gahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Deku please. please please please if you really are going to leave All Might here, please be so very careful in choosing your farewell words to him now because have this sudden horrible fear that this might be the last time you ever see him alive and oh god. oh god oh god

DEKU NO, YOU’RE REALLY NOT!?!?

I HAVE NEVER SEEN ANYONE LESS FINE IN MY LIFE, ACTUALLY????

holy shit. and the fucking callback to the prophecy now. just in case we forgot. WHICH FYI, WE DIDN’T. but that’s basically confirming that this is all still very much on the table and HORIKOSHI NEVER FORGETS oh my god someone please hold me

and the fact that Deku’s flashing back to it now too, though?? because he never forgot either, because of course he didn’t, and now all this stuff is happening, and AFO’s words are getting to him, and this is literally his worst fear come to life and so of course he’s distancing himself from everyone, and now it’s finally come to even this. even the person he admires most

-- OKAY NO, FUCKING COME ON ALREADY I CAN’T TAKE THIS

I GET IT OH MY GOD, I ALREADY UNDERSTAND THE EMOTIONAL IMPACT OF THIS MOMENT WITHOUT ALL OF THE DEVASTATING FLASHBACKS THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH!! YOU ACTUALLY DO WANT ME TO CRY, HUH, IS THAT IT. THIS MAN THAT HE THINKS OF AS A FATHER, THIS MAN WHO HAS BEEN EVERYTHING TO HIM SINCE HE WAS A VERY YOUNG CHILD. EVERYTHING THEY’VE BEEN THROUGH, JUXTAPOSED AGAINST EVERYTHING DEKU IS UP AGAINST, EVERYTHING THAT’S AT RISK. LET’S JUST PUT IT ALL SIDE BY SIDE. LET’S JUST PILE ON ALL OF THE FEELS

(ETA: just a quick note that even though some of the posts I’ve read have described these as All Might’s flashbacks, I’m pretty sure they are Deku’s. most of these are scenes that only he was there for, so yeah. even though All Might is the one thinking the thoughts on the next page, the flashbacks are what’s running through Deku’s mind right now, and so we’re getting that emotion from both of them, which makes it extra devastating lol.)

wait, what???

WHAT??? do you really think that’s why he’s been so determined to protect you this entire time?? simply because you’re his successor?

-- oh no wait lol I think I got that mixed up, this is All Might saying that Deku feels the need to protect him. well that makes more sense lol

oh my god I cannot

his last words. his last words to him. and we can’t even see if he is smiling, like All Might always encouraged him to do. but what are the odds he can’t actually bring himself to do it. what are the odds he’s actually crying. oh god this scene is going to rip my heart out and STOMP on it in the anime isn’t it. Deku’s VA is going to full on murder me with emotion. not that there’ll be much of me left to murder after the thorough job that Horikoshi has already done here

YOU’RE CRYING. DEKU IS LEAVING ALL MIGHT AND IGNORING HIS OUTSTRETCHED HAND AND YOU’RE CRYING. AND BY “YOU” I MEAN “ME”, FUCK

nope nope nope nope nope nope nope nope nope no words just feels just a big ol’ pile of feels. I do not have the strength. future me... [broadly gestures] good luck with all that

(ETA: LOL, WELL THEN.

what breaks my heart here is All Might. All Might, and everything he’s been through, and history repeating itself, and forcing him to live this moment from both sides because he wasn’t strong enough to fix things.

Toshinori had only just turned eighteen when Nana died. like, I feel like we don’t mention this enough. the All Might we know is a sixty-something-year-old man, and so everyone always talks about him like he’s basically been an adult forever. but he was a child when he met Nana. and he was still just a child when she died. barely a year older than Deku is now. younger than Mirio was when we first met him.

and we don’t talk about that. we don’t talk about how devastating that was for him. and we don’t talk about how the reason he grew up to become so reserved and withdrawn -- for all that he always tried so hard to outwardly project the image of a bold, confident, smiling hero -- was specifically because of what AFO did to him. because AFO targeted him in the exact way that he is now targeting Deku. because that’s what he does. he goes after every new user of OFA, and he finds out what’s most important to them, and then he destroys it. and for Toshinori, that was Nana. if you’ve read All Might Rising, you know that AFO basically killed her in front of him (and only killed her, while letting Toshinori and Gran get away). Toshinori (while crying) later says she was like a mother to him. and interestingly enough, during this same conversation, Gran tells Toshinori that he can see “that madness in [his] eyes” when Toshi talks about becoming strong enough to defeat AFO. madness in his eyes. sound familiar??

what’s happening to Deku now is the exact same thing that happened to Toshinori when he was a boy. AFO tried every bit as hard to break him as he’s trying with Deku now. “the path you’ve chosen is a thorny one. every battle grinds away at your soul with no end in sight.” we don’t talk about how Toshinori experienced this same thing for forty fucking years. and all the while isolating himself, exactly like Deku is doing now. pushing people away, exactly like Deku. because he never had anyone who was able to reach out and pull him back. and those words that he now finds himself frozen and unable to speak -- “don’t push yourself”; “you can rest” -- are the same words that no one ever said to him until decades later, when it was already far too late to make any difference.

everything that Deku is experiencing now is what Toshinori also went through. and it’s only now, as he watches it happen to his student, the boy he loves like a son, that he’s finally starting to realize the full extent of how wrong it was. you shouldn’t have to fight alone. you shouldn’t have to bear that kind of enormous burden alone. you shouldn’t have to push yourself, and you can rest. you can rest.

but it’s too late. just as he’s finally coming to understand it all, it’s all too fucking late. and he can’t say the words, he doesn’t know how to say the words, and then just like that, Deku is gone.

and he’s alone. again.)

I can’t. this can’t be their goodbye. I’m not ready. for this to be how they finally part, and then they never see each other again except in OFA. how is that fair. how is that fair. how is that fair

fuck me. lol. how many pages are left in this thing. let’s just wrap this up lol. so now of all the times for this fucking guy to finally show up

I can’t believe Stain has been here literally this entire time hiding behind this random wall and cutting onions. that was you who was cutting the onions, right. no need to answer that we’ll just say it was

HORIKOSHI JUST END THE CHAPTER PLEASE I’M OUT OF SPOONS. YOU HURT ME SO GOOD AND I LOVE YOU FOR IT BUT YOU NEED TO LET ME GO NOW SO I CAN BEGIN THE PROCESS OF TRYING TO PUT MY LIFE BACK IN ORDER HERE. SO WHERE ARE WE CUTTING TO NOW WHAT IS HAPPENING

Stain did you also let AFO give you a new quirk. what’s with you guys. do you like blowing up

oh nvm lol because they were talking about THIS GUY ohhhhhh my fucking god

THAT’S BECAUSE HE’S SAD, LINDA!! jesus

omfg. and so yes, good, the chapter is ending here now on page 15. for once I am FULLY on board with that lmao

anyway so tune in next week for more adventures of Werewolf Deku!! that is, assuming we don’t finally cut back to U.A. at long last, which is actually a strong possibility considering that this chapter will likely mark the end of volume 31. it sure wouldn’t kill Horikoshi to start giving us some hope after everything he’s just put us through lol. KACCHAN COME GET YA BOY

[angelicyoongie]

lmfao. i knew that lovesick mc was gonna wake up to a nightmare in ch. 8 but 😀

right off the bat, the idea of waking up in a place you don’t recognize is horrifying. but waking up in a REPLICA of your room???? as in, someone has secretly been there enough to know the exact layout of everything too?? 🫠

also not at how i’d be like, dead on day 1 bc one little “are u fr? do u even hear urself” from me when joon and tae are fondly justifying their stalker behavior would probably make them snap 💀 ALSO VMIN IS SO SCARY??? like they’re so sus. what are they up to? why are they whispering to each other? 👀👀

also jimin just casually hanging out in utter darkness 💀 idk why that’s SO funny to me when i KNOW it wasn’t intended to come across that way 😂 i’m guessing he expected her to try to escape? or do they kind of take turns keeping an eye out? was he also there the first couple of nights she was knocked out?

i do really like the two theories about their soul bound a lot tho! i think the neuron one is a great comparison to how they’re all connected, but not gonna lie, i was also very “wait that’s actually really cute” about how they all wanted to write letters to her bc tae did 🤧

also, listen mc, just ask the guys if we have 1 butt or 2 butts and slip out of there while they debate 💀💀 no but seriously, i’m curious how the next chapter will play out with her pretending✨ to at least like them. i’m guessing she might “warm up” to JK first to show she’s trying.

i think this was a good chapter as well! like i really feel for the mc bc i don’t know what i’d even do with myself with 7 insane people in a cabin 💀 they’d probably drive me insane too

it's so scary!! i would just go back to bed and pretend nothing was wrong 💀 and i don't think i would last very long either, i would slip up and run my mouth immediately, lmao. we gotta keep a close eye on vmin, that's for sure 👀 oh you know ... how they know the mc is lying, how they would like to punish her, fun stuff like that <3

tbh it is kinda funny if you think about it, him just sitting there in the darkness, waiting for her just in case she tries to escape 💀 i'll touch more on it in the next chapter, but they take turns watching over it! i feel like he knew y/n would be knocked out for a while, so he probably made some of the others watch out the first few nights so that he could be ready for when she woke up 😬

thank you!! isn't it?? i know taehyung is one of the worst but he does have some cute moments, lol 🤧

yup, just ask about butts or perilla leaves and you're good to slip away lmao! you'll find out very soon how that plays out, hehe!

oh absolutely, i would've lost my marbles by day three, rip. thank you so much!! 💖💖

[widows-writings]

Happy Ending

Chapter 2

Chpt 1.

Summary: Summary: An old friend of Bruce's comes back after being gone for over 20 years. She was kidnapped, created into a weapon. When Talia loses her home and almost her life, she moves in with Alfred and Bruce. Talia decides to take sides with Batman to figure out more about who was trying to kill her, which blurs the lines between the secret life that both Bruce and Talia share. After finding out his secret of who he was and what he knew, Talia finds herself, living the life that she wanted, away from all these secrets. A life with Bruce Wayne. A life where they are happy and Gotham is what it should have been. The thing is, it's not a fantasy and it's not real life, it's somewhere in between. Bruce has to try and get to her as both himself and as Batman before the people that are trying to kill Talia complete their goal.

a/n: No, this wasn't by popular demand, I just fucked up enough and I wanted to be nice, I might just post another chapter tomorrow, but I haven't really been working on this since I worked yesterday. This chapter is kind of angsty, kind of not, idk how to describe it,. It either way, it exists. So here you go. Again I'm also very sorry for the confusion that I caused with my last post because I don't know how to work Tumblr.

Warnings: Cursing, alluding to torture, trauma, kidnapping, if there is anything else, please let me know.

Words: 2,634

The next morning, she woke up. She was in her room, in her old bed. Nothing had changed, it was all the same it was, the way she left it. Even her parents didn’t change anything. They never had another kid after her. She was the only one. Talia had to rack her brain, trying to figure out what all Christopher had told her last night. The only thing she could remember was that he was happy that she was back, anything past that, she didn’t know. Talia rubbed her forehead and sat up in bed. Christopher had taken her coat, but she was still in her uniform from earlier. She made fun of Batman for how stupid he looked, she was never going to let him see this.

A uniform given to her by the people who kidnapped her, that raised her to be a fighting machine. That’s what it was. She took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. What was she going to do? Who was she going to see? What was she going to ask? Talia was new to Gotham again, she needed to rediscover what had been lost to her, she needed to figure out where she stood. It was time for a history lesson. It was time to relearn everything about her home. If there was some guy dressed as a bat running around, what else changed?

She got out of bed and her legs dangled over the edge, her toes barely touching the ground. Talia pushed herself up and onto the floor and let her body readjust. She stretched, then let her arms fall at her sides. Talia opened the door to her bedroom and found a note on the floor, next to some clothing. They were her mother’s clothing, she would have recognized the shirt at any given moment. These were your mother’s, hopefully they fit well. Talia grabbed the clothing and closed the door and got changed.

It was nice to not be in the uniform, but part of her missed it. The uniform had been a part of her life, it had been her for years. Talia knew she had to let it go, but as she looked at herself in the mirror, she knew that she needed to be something, someone else. She draped the uniform over the back of the chair and headed downstairs, following the sweet smell of chai tea. In the kitchen was Christopher, there was another man next to him, he was using a cane to prop himself up. He had a large smile on his face. Talia figured that she should know him, but nothing came to mind.

Talia looked below on her right side and saw the sitting room. There was another man sitting there. She would have sworn he was just picked up off the street. He wore clothing way too big for his frame and sunglasses. He looked hungover, but to an extreme level. Talia shook her head and walked down the stairs, sliding her way into the kitchen. She was greeted with a hug from Christopher, who kissed the side of her head and handed her a cup of chai tea. She nodded in thanks and took a sip. If she could stay there and soak in the sweet taste of what was dancing on her tongue, she would. She would stay there forever. It was the other man in the kitchen that startled her.

“Oh my dear girl, it’s good to see you.” Alfred. He sounded older. Of course he was older. “I’m happy your back, there was just something missing the entire time you were gone.”

She gave him a smile and a nod. “I’m happy to be back as well. My absence hopefully didn’t cause too many problems.”

“No matter how long you are gone, there is always going to be something missing.”

Talia gave a weak smile and took another sip of her tea. Alfred turned towards the sitting room, at the man that she swore was asleep and shook his head. He walked over and shook the man awake. He snorted awake and looked around, terrified of where he was. Alfred bent down and whispered something in his ear and Talia felt his eyes on her, even through the sunglasses. They were burning into her skin, picking her apart, trying to figure out who she was. His lips pursed and he leaned forward, his elbows on his knees. Unspoken familiarity between the two of them.

“It’s Mr. Bruce Wayne, Mistress.” Christopher whispered to her.

“I care why?”

“An old friend can make adjusting easier.”

It made her sick to think that she needed to readjust to the place that she called home. What was she after all these years? A stranger? Someone that Bruce barely knew? She could be…nothing at this point. She took another sip of her tea and nodded her head. She walked over to the sitting room and sat down across the way from Bruce, trying to understand him. Figure out who he was now. He was so different from the boy that she used to know. He is hurt, unconsolable. Someone that she barely knew. She set the cup on a coaster and leaned back into the seat she was in. Alfred left almost like it was written in a script.

“You’d think they’d written it.” She muttered.

“Planned it more likely.” His voice had dropped an octave and a half since the last time she had heard him speak.

“Are you serious?”

“If I was joking I wouldn’t be here right now.”

“And where do you want to be Mr. Wayne?”

“Asleep.”

“Me too, to be completely honest. I feel like I’ve had at least 3 bottles of vodka right down the hatch.” She whispered, laughing to herself, she saw his lips twitch up.

She couldn't describe what she was feeling, it was an old, familiar feeling. She ran her fingers through her hair, smiling while looking at the ground. Bruce looked like he was on the verge of falling asleep again and Talia shook her head. She knew that Bruce needed the sleep and she would be able to catch up later, so she walked over to Alfred and Christopher and gave them both a small smile. She knew that they were going to be defeated when she told them that the conversation was being cut short, but she would make it a note to visit Bruce and Alfred in Wayne Tower.

"Alright, well you best come and visit us. It gets quite lonely in the tower." Alfred said. "Having someone to share tea with is more than a pleasure."

Talia smiled and nodded her head, looking at Christopher, who was wearing a smile, but he wasn't actually happy. She knew that he wanted her to catch up with them, hoping that it would make the news that was awaiting her easier to swallow, but he should have known that it wasn't going to go that way, she was going to fight every step of the way, she was going to do this her way or it wasn't going to get done. She was going to catch up on her own, and that was that. She didn’t need help from Bruce or Alfred, what she needed to know, she was going to learn on her own. That’s how it had to be.

Alfred gave Talia a hug goodbye and whispered that she was always welcome at their place if she needed a place to relax. Somewhere that she might be able to call a second home. She only smiled and thanked him in response. Bruce only shook her hand, but Talia could tell that there was something very different about him. Whether or not he was the playboy that everyone made him out to be, there was something there that Talia could only describe as…unmitigated pain. He was hurting and it was beyond whatever personal traumas he had faced, it was bigger. Almost as if he was shouldering the whole weight of the world on his shoulders, like he had to fix everything that was being tossed his way. She told him to get rest and to feel better, to which he only nodded.

She watched as Bruce and Alfred left, Bruce barely being able to stand from how tired he was. He really was using the money to do whatever he wanted. Whatever hangover she had, he must have had it so much worse. Talia went back into the sitting room and sat back down, grabbing her tea and taking small sips. Christopher followed her and sat down next to her, newspapers in hand. He looked nervous and Talia didn't like that, it meant that there was news that was going to be hard for her to process in that pile of papers. She had been trained to work through this, to not have grief, to not really have emotions, but there was no stopping it, she was human. She had been the worst at suppressing her emotions, but everything that had been prepped, it's almost like Christopher knew that she was going to be coming back.

The world that she knew, it really had changed to the point where it was almost unrecognizable. It was nothing like what she remembered. She knew that, she should have known that the second that she saw what happened to the Wayne Estate. How could she think, this was her home, these people had been like her family. She just wanted it all to be the same, to be the way that she left it, just like her bedroom. She knew that it wasn’t going to happen, it was an empty wish, a dream. Something she will never have, so when it came time to know what had been happening in Gotham for the last 20 years, Talia knew that she was in for some really big surprises. What she wasn’t expecting were the two that she was hit with right out of the gate.

"I'm sorry. There are things in here I wish you didn't have to know about, but I promised your mom and dad that I would tell you about everything important, starting with their death." He grabbed Talia's hand while telling her this. She squeezed it, hearing about her parents death. "The other important thing you need to know is that Bruce's parents died." That was another punch to the gut.

When her parents weren't around, Bruce's parents were there. They were here non-biological aunt and uncle. Hearing about their death was one of the harder pills to swallow, she already knew about the Batman due to their meeting the night before, but everything else, crime and all of that. It was a hard pill to swallow. She thought that things would get better, that Gotham would have been okay, but she should have known that the second she saw a man dressed as a bat, that shit had hit the fan when it came to crime. She shook her head when Christopher finished and gave him a look, her eyes filled with tears.

There was so much that she didn’t know about, so much that she missed out on. She hadn’t grown up here, she wasn’t from Gotham anymore, she was from somewhere else. The city had grown and changed so much over the years, that it was hard to call it home anymore. Talia shook her head, processing everything that had just been tossed her way. Her mind wandered, taking her back to her kidnapping, back to why she was taken. She didn’t know why. She wanted to know why, so it was the first that she asked Christopher to explain to her.

"Why did my parents give me up? Was it so I could miss all of this? Was it so I couldn't help?" She whispered.

"Your parents believed that if they sent you away, you would come back and could defend Gotham, much to what Batman is doing." Christopher told her.

"You're wrong. My parents turned me into a monster and you knew that. They didn’t send me away to protect Gotham, they sent me away to become a killing machine. Do you know what they did to me there?”

“I don’t need to be reminded.”

That was possibly the part that hurt the most. He knew what they were doing to her and he didn’t do anything. He didn’t stop them, he didn’t protect her. That was his job, he was supposed to help her, to keep her safe and he just let them take her and torture her, beat her, give her powers that she didn’t want. He let them turn her into the killing machine that she is now. She knew that he couldn’t do anything, if he even spoke out against her parents, who knows what would have happened, but still. All she could feel was pain in her heart and she wanted to get rid of it. She didn’t want to feel the emotions that she was feeling, she knew that if she let herself feel them, something bad was going to happen. She took a couple of deep breaths, letting them out as slowly as she could, hoping that it would keep her emotions at bay.

“I can’t believe you knew,” She whispered, her voice breaking. Her second time crying in the last 24 hours and it was about two very different things.

“I swore to do nothing, I swore to not interfere.”

“Yeah. Well that turned me into a monster. I’m not who I used to be.”

Talia stuck out her hand and blue mist surrounded her hand and the cup that was beside

her. She closed her fist and the glass shattered, the tea suspended in the air. This was one of the few times that she was using her powers outside of when they asked her to. When they asked her to throw the people that she was with, when she was trained in combat with the powers. To keep her at bay, they put her in a sock collar, a straight jacket and a muzzle. They treated her like an animal and he knew. He knew all along what they were doing to her and didn’t dare do a thing.

The look in Christopher’s eyes was terror. Not even he knew the extent of what they had done to her. He knew about the combat training and all of the other things, but her possessing magic abilities like this was kept from him. The woman that was sitting next to him was hurting and now he could see why. She was a lost child, she just wanted a normal life and she didn’t get one, she was tossed into training and she wasn’t given the chance to grow up, to become the adult that she was meant to be.

Christopher hung his head and pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to hide the fact that he was crying. “I’m so sorry. You didn’t deserve this. You didn’t deserve any of this.” He struggled to say through sobs.

Talia watched as he cried in front of her. She couldn’t bear to look at him. She didn’t know who he was anymore. He was a stranger. There was hopefully one person in the world that she could talk to about this and it was Alfred, but knowing how her family and the Wayne’s talked, he more than likely knew, which meant that Bruce knew too. She was going to assume that everyone that was in her inner circle knew about what had happened to her, and it made her sick to her core.

“I don’t know you anymore.” She whispered and headed up to her room.

******

Taglist: @hollandorks

[chrizbang]

Pairing: Bang Chan x female reader

Genre: Romance, eventual smut, slow burn

Warnings: Idol!Chan, awkward date, mentions of food, suggestive (just a mention of penis, lol)

Word count: 1.702

Chapters: 1, 2

"Are you an idol?"

"What are you going to wear?" Mia asked. She was sitting on your bed, next to a pile of clothes. You were trying to choose the perfect outfit but nothing looked good enough. Yeah, you were panicking. "I don't know," you whined, defeated. "Why don't you wear a cute dress? Like this one?" Mia raised a white tight dress in the air.

"Mia, it's a date at his house. I need to wear something casual but it still needs to make me look hot. I need new clothes." "Nope." Mia got up, gathering some clothes from the mess on your bed. "You need to get your shit together. Here." She handed you a white long sleeve shirt and a leather skirt that made your ass look amazing. "Use it with some vans and boom! Hot and cozy." "I think that will do." "And for your make-up?" "I want something soft since I'm only going to his house." "Makes sense. Get ready already so I can take you there." "Are you really going to do this for me, bestie?" You made a silly face. Mia rolled her eyes. "Just get dressed."

Mia stopped her car at the address that Chan sent you. She asked you if you wanted her to get you when you left, but you assured her that you would take an uber. On the way, you messaged Chan telling him that you were close. When you arrived, he was waiting for you at the door. "Hi," you waved at him. For a moment you realized that you looked like an excited teenager and you had to fight the urge to laugh at yourself. "Hey," Chan smiled and hugged you. It was a quick hug but it was enough to make you feel your legs shaking. "Come in," he said. You noticed how that the place looked big, it was well decorated but simple, nothing fancy. "So, remember the guys you saw at the restaurant with me?" Chan asked, standing next to the door with you. He helped you to take your coat off so he could hang it on the coat rack. "Yes, I do." "We live together. I asked them to leave, so it's just the two of us." "Oh," you widened your eyes. "Okay." "I-It's not what you're thinking though. It's just so we could have privacy." He raised his hands, trying to defend himself. "It's okay," you laughed. "I think it's for the best. I would probably feel really embarrassed around a bunch of boys I don't know." Both of you stayed there for a moment, avoiding each other's eyes, not knowing what to say. Chan was wearing a white t-shirt that looked really good on him and some jeans. His hair was way too styled up for someone who was staying at home. "It's there something burning?" you asked. "Oh, shit!" Chan ran to the kitchen, trying to save something that was inside of the oven. "Oh, fuck," he complained while he put it on the balcony. Whatever that was, it was not edible anymore. "What was that?" you asked him. "I wanted to do something different for our date so I tried to cook a pie. But it clearly didn't work." You laughed out loud, throwing your head back. "I'm sorry, Chan," you said, crying because of how much you were laughing. Chan smiled, feeling satisfied by hearing you laugh. "It's okay," he giggled. "I guess we'll have to order takeout." "Sounds good to me," you chuckled, cleaning your tears. Chan ordered fast food. You were eating it in the kitchen with him but you couldn't help but notice the poorly placed curtain at the end of the kitchen. You laughed. "What?" Chan asked, his mouth full of food. "Nothing," you said. "Hey, I wanted to ask you something. It's okay if you don't want to talk about it." Chan raised his eyebrow. "What is it?" "Are you an idol?" Chan widened his eyes, choking on his food. He grabbed a cup of juice to help him out.  After taking two big sips and clearing his throat, he started to talk. "Uhm, yes, I'm an idol,” his voice was low almost like he was telling you a secret. "That's very nice, Chan." "Sorry for not telling you." He looked worried. "It's just that things are way more complicated when it comes to relationships when you are an idol, and-" "Look," you interrupted him. "You don't have to explain yourself. It's not like you were hiding that you were married with kids." Chan laughed, feeling relieved. "Your friends, they are also part of the group, right?" "Yes. I'm the leader," Chan said with a soft smile and pride in his expression. Chan talked about the group, their hardships, and the members. You could see the love in his eyes when he talked about them. He clearly was passionate about it. He assured you that he would introduce you to them the next time. "So there will be a next time?" you purred. "If you want to." He smiled and you felt your heart skip a beat. "I would love to."

"There something..." Chan said, pointing to your mouth. "What?" "There something on your mouth." "Here?" you asked, touching the right corner of your mouth. "Here," Chan reached to your mouth, cleaning it with his thumb. You knew that your cheeks were bright red. You chuckled, lowering your head and looking at your food. "Thank you," you whispered. "You look really cute when you're shy," Chan teased. "Stop," you laughed, hiding your face with your hands. "Don't act like you're not shy too." "I am," Chan agreed, shaking his head and licking his lips. "It's been a while since the last time I had a date. I don't really have much free time." He looked thoughtful. You noticed that he was trying to be careful with his words. Maybe he didn't want to scare you away. "I can imagine." "To be honest, I wasn't even looking for a date. But when I saw you..." Chan stopped and looked at you, his eyes were shining bright, his cheeks red and the cute dimples were prominent on his face while he smiled. "I don't know. You are something else." "Chan, stop." You closed your eyes, not knowing how to deal with his compliments. "You barely know me." "That's why we are on a date, right? I want to know everything about you." You smiled. Maybe he was just being a philanderer. But the way he looked at you made you feel like he was being honest. You and Chan talked a lot. He wasn't joking when he said that he wanted to know everything about you. He asked about your work, your family, your friends, your dreams, the things you liked to do. He listened to you with so much attention and care that you didn't even notice that it was late.

"I think I should get going," you said, the disappointment of leaving was very clear in your voice.

"Really?" Chan pouted. "Yeah, I have to work tomorrow." "Okay," Chan got up to get your coat. "Thank you for coming, I had a lot of fun today." "Thank you for having me," you said, following him. "I'm sorry for not being able to take you home." "Chan, don't worry about it." Chan locked eyes with you. You saw his eyes wandering for a moment to your lips while he licked his. You felt like you were going to faint if he didn't do something. Should you kiss him? Was he going to kiss you? You weren't able to know the answer because somebody opened the door, startling both of you. "Oh, hey. Sorry, I forgot about your date," a tall man said. "Y/N, this is Hyunjin, Hyunjin, this is Y/N," Chan said, his lips distorting in a way that showed that he was upset for being interrupted. "Nice to meet you," you giggled. "Nice to meet you too." "I have to go," you said, walking through them to the door. "Text me when you get home, okay?" Chan asked. "Sure! Bye." You waved at him and left. While you were walking away, you were pretty sure you heard Chan saying something like "I could have kissed her if it wasn't for you" to Hyunjin. You laughed.

"How was it?" you heard Mia asking through your phone. You threw yourself on the bed, sighing. "It was amazing." "Don't fall in love, girl. It was just one date." "I'm not in love." You rolled your eyes. "But it's impossible not to be amazed by him." "Did he kissed you?" "No. I think he was about to but somebody else came home and I left." "I can't believe you ran away," Mia mocked you. "I didn't run away, Mia. I just... I don't know, I'm too shy about this. I'm not bold like you" you scoffed. "t's okay, baby. I still love you even though you are a little chicken." You rolled your eyes again. Suddenly, you heard the ringtone of your phone indicating that you had a message. It was from Chan. "Wait, hold on. I'll call you later, I just got a message from Chan." "I hope it is a picture of his big cock." "Mia!" you laughed. "Bye." "Bye, girl." You opened the text to see what Chan sent to you. Chan, 10:32 pm: Hey Chan, 10:32 pm: I was wondering if you wanna come over to watch a movie Chan, 10:32 pm: When you are free Y/N, 10:32 pm: yeah, sure Y/N, 10:33 pm: I would love to Chan, 10:33 pm: Okay then Chan, 10:33 pm: I'll introduce you to my friends Chan, 10:34 pm: But I need to warn you that they are very loud Y/N, 10:35 pm: that sounds fun Y/N, 10:37 pm: I need to warn you that I might stay a little shy for a while Chan, 10:38 pm: It's okay Chan, 10:38 pm: You can hold my hand if you want Chan, 10:38 pm: You know, just to help you overcome your shyness Y/N, 10:38: I would love to You smiled and went to sleep, excited for your next date with Chan.

A/N: Thank you so much for reading, I hope you enjoyed. Sorry for kissblocking the caracthers (idk if this is a term, lol).

[moonyblackwerewolf]

Betrothed Ch. 4 - Sirius Black

Betrothed Ch. 4

Sirius Black x fem!Reader

Word count: 4.7k

Summary: Sirius and Y/N meet at a family dinner and have some fun, later she finds out she is betrothed to some pureblood boy so Sirius comes up with a mental idea to save them both.

Warnings: Kissing, hints of sex, aggressive parents, underage drinking, idk my writing and English? lol

a/n: Oh my god this is so long! I hope you guys like it, i think there is only 2 chapters left, idk yet. Anyway Feedback is always welcome, thank you guys :)

Xxxx

Ch.1 Ch.2 Ch. 2.5 Ch.3 Ch.4 Ch. 5 

When Y/n got home, she had time before going to the Malfoys, so she was planning on how to gently tell her parents she didn’t want to go and that she wasn’t going to accept their marriage proposal too. She spend days thinking and decided it was time, because her mom was already telling her to get prepared to go, so she sent a letter to Sirius as promised telling him she would talk to her parents on that day. 

Later the family sat down in a living room and waited for Y/n to say what she wanted to.

“So? What do you want to tell us, your father and I are busy” her mother said impatiently, not knowing the bomb her daughter would throw at her.

Y/n took a deep breath and said “I don’t want to marry Malfoy, I’m not accepting his proposal.” As simple as that single phrase sounded like, it cost her so much more. Her parents were outraged to say the very least, how could she misbehave after all those year of being so obedient.

“What do you mean you won’t? Yes you will, the Malfoys are getting their answers next week” Her mother screamed.

To say her parent were furious was an understatement. She was disrespecting not only their choice of husband, but also their ancient family traditions. But in reality that’s exactly what she felt like, those traditions were ancient and full of nonsense, it is completely wrong to promise a girl to some narcissist, conservative, arrogant, aggressive prick and make her spend the rest of her life with him, loosing all of her liberty.

“Are you calling Lucius a prick? He is a member of one respectable family Y/n!” Her father grunted, grabbing his wand.

“Why? Because they’re pureblood?” Y/n yelled, since she was already fighting their principles she might as well do it right. “That’s nonsense why would a blood status change a person? It doesn't change anything, I know many muggle borns who are ten times better people than you are, you think you can judge everyone, just because you’re pure? Or rich? Or call yourself royal? Which is absurd by the way, you and I know there isn’t royalty in our world, you only say that because you want to be better than everyone else, so you lie and you’re powerful enough for people to believe you” she roared, it felt incredible to take some of her frustrations out of her chest for once in her life, she didn’t have to pretend to be a well behaved purist, like she was before.

Mr. Watson wouldn’t believe his daughter, he didn’t want to, so he kept blinding himself from the ugly truth that he was indeed wrong. “I won’t tolerate you disrespecting our tradition Y/n” with a wave from his hands Charles hit Y/n with the Cruciatus curse, taking her to the ground almost immediately. 

“Dad! Stop- you’re hurting me, please! You’re hurting me” She cried and begged and squirmed, it felt agonising the pain touched each and every part of her body, the tears ran freely down her face, after being hit a certain amount of times she just felt numb to the pain, she stayed still wrapping her knees with all the strength she had left.

“You are going to marry Lucius Malfoy and you are going to accept his proposal in person when you go to his house, because you’re still going and I don’t want to hear a single complain or any of these ideas you cultivated in your mind, you are going to bring us respect” With no remorse her father left her there small, hugging her legs and crying alone, earning only a polite nod from her mother followed by a ‘I warned you’ look.

The rest of her time at home went by so slow she thought a whole month had passed, she was now feeling so bad being in her own house that she almost wanted to go to the Malfoys. Her parents weren’t even letting her see the mail, which meant she wasn’t receiving Sirius’ letters. Her sister wouldn’t talk with her anymore, scared of having the same fate as Y/n and her brother didn’t even know what was happening with his little sister.

The day she was going to the Malfoy manor had arrived. Her parents dropped her there in that shark tank like it meant nothing, they didn’t even bother saying good bye, she had come a long way from being the perfect daughter, who was always respectful with her parents and their ideals. Being at the Malfoys felt like being in Azkaban, but it was still better than being at home at least, there she was treated with extreme respect by Abraxas Malfoy and his wife, they were doing it out of interest of course but it was better than nothing, her only problem was Lucius, she hated him and hated even more that she’d need to sleep in his bed with him and even more that she’d have to accept his proposal by the end of the week. She felt stuck.

After having dinner Mrs. Malfoy showed you to Lucius’ room, while the house elf carried Y/n’s trunk next to the bed. The room was nice and big but it was cold and dark, she felt bad in there, fear creeping into her chest as her whole body felt numb, she just wished she could be in Sirius’ bed in the dormitories, she didn’t know why but there, by Sirius’ side was the most perfect place to be, she felt warm and safe.

“That’s it sweetheart, goodnight” after showing the room, with a final goodbye Mrs. Malfoy let her there alone, with Lucius. He was handsome, sharp jaw, strong upper body, beautiful face, she couldn’t deny it but it felt so wrong, it was sickening, she didn’t love him, she couldn’t, he was a terrible person.

“Look Y/n/n, I have to say, back in Hogwarts I was a bit jealous from you and Sirius, but now, being here with you, feels so right” he said as he was inching closer to her “Come on, let’s go to bed” his fingers were brushing her waist, the single phrase and action made her feel sick, his touch was ice cold, but what choice did she have. Y/n knew the punishment she’d have to face if she didn’t behave

“Ok” she replied, mouth dry “I’ll go change, in the bathroom”. She opened her trunk and looked for comfortable pyjamas, but to her surprise there were only vulgar sleeping clothes and lingeries, she felt a cold in her spine that made her sicker, her mother had it all planned out, crazy she thought, her mother is crazy. The last straw was when she saw a note from her mom.

Bought you some new clothes for you to share with Lucius.

Love,

Mom

She wondered what would It feel like to have a real caring mother, not one that just clearly wants her to have sex so she can have grandchildren. But she was born on a deranged family. She had no choice, so she just chose the pieces that were most discreet and even those weren't even a bit discreet, it was a black lace bra that at least covered her breasts perfectly and went a bit down and matching panties, if there was something she was sure of, it was that she didn’t want to see Lucius’ face when he saw her.

But again, she had no choice, when she entered the room again Lucius gaze fell directly on her chest. “My eyes are up here you know right?” She asked with a bored voice, while lying down in bed, much to her dismay.

“Feisty” he chuckled lying in bed besides her “I’ve always liked you Watson” Lucius was being a tease but she could see it in his eyes that he was drooling over her. She hated it. So she turned over and closed her eyes, wanting desperately to sleep for the whole time she’d be stuck there “Good night for you too, love” the nickname Sirius used to call her seemed so cold now, sounded fake coming form Lucius’ mouth. That night her thoughts kept going back to Sirius, she wondered if he was trying to talk to her, trying to reach her somehow but being unsuccessful thanks to her cruel parents. She missed him, his touch, his affections and she missed Lily, if she was here they’d talk the whole night and then maybe it wouldn’t fell so lonely, she missed reading with Remus, joking and pranking people with James and how protective he was and Peter’s cute but sarcastic comments, she missed her true family.

The next few days sucked, Y/n was running out of the less vulgar clothes, Lucius was always trying to kiss her and get close to her and the Malfoys’ forced kindness was beginning to annoy her, on top of that she didn’t feel like home in this house, she didn’t feel comfortable to do anything, basically she was counting the days until she could go back to Hogwarts.

——————————

Sirius knew something was wrong when Y/n didn’t answer any of his letters, assuming that she’d now probably be at the Malfoys, he needed to talked to her. The thought of Malfoy touching her and the things he could do made his blood boil, she was his friend after all. But things at his home weren’t good, his parents were breathing down his neck so he need to find a way to escape, so, of course he asked James for help.

James and Sirius had come up with a plan, but it was certainly dangerous and potentially problematic, just like everything they did. The plan was: Sirius would sneak away from his house, once he managed to do so he would meet with James in his house and the both boys would go pay the Malfoys a visit, once inside Sirius would need to distract the Malfoys since their families are friends while James helped Y/n run away to his house. It wasn’t quite a brilliant plan, they didn’t have much time to think, but Sirius needed to be sure she was safe.

Now Sirius thought he would have great difficulty running away, he waited for everyone to fall asleep to leave his bedroom, managed to avoid the elves, went to the broom closet, grabbed a broomstick, everything was doing great, except for one thing. Sirius’ brother Regulus thought he had herd something and went downstairs, only to find he’s rebellious younger brother trying to run away.

“What do you think you’re doing this time of night Sirius?” Regulus asked not even a bit surprised by his brother’s actions.

Shit, Sirius thought, he had two options lie or tell the truth. He chose the boldest one “Reg, don’t tell our parents” he looked helpless for the first time in his life, Regulus was quite startled “I need to save my friend, she’s in danger. I know we’re not in the best terms but, do this one favour for me-” he paused “I really care about this girl, she’s the Watson’s daughter, you know her”

“What? The Watson’s… you mean Y/n? What happed Sirius? She’s my friend too, is she okay?” He was going to tell his parents before but now he was curious and worried, he liked Y/n, she was nice to him on eventual encounters in their common room or classes.

“She’s- she’s being held captive at the Malfoys” it wasn’t a lie.

“Held captive? And what about her parents? her dad is the Minister of Magic Law Enforcement, what is it you can do that he can’t and on top of that why are the Malfoys supposedly holding her captive?” Regulus was being particularly annoying, he was suspicious of Sirius’ intentions.

“Her parents gave her away, they want her to marry Lucius, but she doesn’t. And i’m willing to ask for her hand if she accepts me, but she wanted to confront her parents, which clearly went terribly wrong” Sirius tried to defend his theses but he didn’t know if Regulus would be willing to let him go or he’d say that she has to marry who her parents want.

“You’re being absurd Sirius, it can’t possibly be that bad, it’s a marriage, considering our families, it’d happen sooner or later. You can’t stop it, if the Malfoys tell our parents they’ll kill you” Regulus was irritated at first, she was only doing what she was supposed to.

“I’m going either way” Sirius wasn’t letting his brother get in the way.

“Ok.” Sirius would be lying if he said he’s jaw hadn’t dropped to the floor. Actually Regulus was quite shocked too, hearing he’s brother say he was willing to marry a girl and a girl that their parents would approve was indeed shocking and he liked Y/n, the thought of her suffering made him less strict with his brother for once.

“W-well- hum ok then” Sirius left as quickly as he could, afraid this was only an hallucination.

James was waiting for Sirius with his bedroom’s window open. When he entered they both went to bed and talked until they fell asleep, the next day would be eventful. Assuming they woke up right before lunch, the boys hurriedly set everything necessary for the plan, muttered apologies to James’ parents and went to pay a visit to Lucius Malfoy. The weather outside was cold, but the sun was shining, making the travel rather beautiful, but the boys didn’t even notice, they were too worried, James couldn’t stop thinking about how Malfoy was treating his best friend, he hated him so much, Sirius had another motives, he hadn’t realised yet and it may take a little push, but he was jealous.

Arriving at that creepy mansion James and Sirius separated, James sneaked in quietly looking for Y/n’s belongings, while Sirius knocked on the door. The house elf asked him to come in and called his master. Mrs. Malfoy was quite surprised but tolerant.

“Good Morning, may i ask your name?” She asked politely 

“Oh i’m Sirius Black, Walburga’s son” 

“Oh! Sirius what a pleasant surprise, is Walburga going to visit us today?” 

“No madam” he paused, grabbing a gift he stole from his parents earlier “my mom asked me to give you this present, I don’t really know why, she didn’t want to tell me what it was” He never lied so badly in his entire life, but knowing Y/n was probably miserable was distracting him.

She found it suspect but didn’t do anything, it was better ti ignore it “How lovely, come in and have lunch with us, Y/n and Lucius will be thrilled to see you” Mrs. Malfoy suggested, probably trying to maintain friendly due to her relationship with the Black family.

Y/n really will, he thought. 

When Y/n saw Sirius she felt hope rise in her chest for the first time since beginning of the break, she ran and hugged him tightly, the hug felt warn and safe, she didn’t want to ever let go. But she had to, the action was inappropriate. “Sirius!!! What are you doing here, what a lovely visit” she said winking at him, trying to hold composure but failing.

“Sirius” Lucius greeted him too cordially “Came to visit my fiancé?” He asked with a smug look on his face.

“Not yet, darling” Y/n retorted with a fake smile

Sirius sat next to her at the big table, the room was dark and big, the table was made of hardwood the only light sources were the sun and a weak candelabra, the room had a giant fireplace that was probably the only warm place in the house and heavy curtains. When Lucius and Mrs. Malfoy were distracted, Sirius whispered to Y/n “Say you have to go to the bathroom, James’ waiting for you outside, he probably already has your Trunk”.

His word startled Y/n, that was a dream come true, but she couldn’t “Sirius, I can’t leave, my parents would kill me” she paused to check if no one was listening “If I run it would create a conflict between my parents and the Malfoys and I don’t want to be caught in the middle of it.” She said pretending to pay attention on Lucius’ commentaries “I’m going to stay here” she continued, shocking Sirius completely.

“But your parents want you to get married Y/n, are you just going to- marry Malfoy and the rest of your life with him?” she looked tense, knowing she’d have no choice, he hated seeing her like that. 

Suddenly she heard Sirius clear his throat loudly, scaring her “I’m sorry to interrupt, but I need to talk with Y/n” he paused, the Malfoys were now looking at him “In private, if you allow us- it’s urgent” Mrs Malfoy looked a little confused but nodded. Sirius took Elena out of the room almost immediately.

“Y/n why in the name of Merlin are you staying here?” 

“I can’t go Sirius, I told you, the Malfoys wouldn’t be happy, it could cause a conflict my parents want to avoid” Sirius didn’t look convinced, he knew she was just making excuses but he didn’t know why.

“Really? Isn’t you’re family the most powerful in the sacred-twenty-eight?” He commented mockingly “Why would they be scared of the Malfoys?” Sirius could see the fear in her eyes, she wanted to go but was scared, so he sat her down on a coach near and asked her with those protective grey eyes that made her feel so protected “Y/n, it’s alright you can tell me anything” he said covering her hands in his protectively.

“No, i-i i can’t tell you” He squeezed her hands reassuringly saying that no one would know if she told him. She took a deep breath, e/c eyes staring at his grey ones “If i run, my parents, will kill me” she said eyes now full of fear, it made them look darker.

“Theoretically, right?” He asked concerned, knowing deep down what kind of family the Watsons were, he was surprised with his shock, cursing himself for the stupid question.

“No Sirius!” She whispered shouted “They’ll actually kill me, you want to know how I ended up here at the Malfoys after I told them I didn’t want to come? Do you?” She looked at him waiting for an answer, he nodded “They used two of the three unforgivable curses on me, every day until I agreed to come and marry Lucius” her voice was cracking “They used Imperio, made me not move and then used Cruciatus, I was feeling so much pain that I thought I was going to die and worse, I couldn't move a toe, I couldn’t even try to ease my pain by screaming and moving because i was under their control.” His eyes were now burning with anger “To get me to come here they used Imperio again and I don’t them to use it ever again, I lost all my free will, so what choice do I have?” Her voice was cracking, fighting the urge to cry, only the mere thought of what had happed scared her. “They’d rather see me dead than seeing me go rogue and ruin the family name” she paused, taking a breath and continued, desperation written all over her face “Why do you think i’ve always been pureblood propaganda for my parents? The gracious perfect daughter, perfect sister, the perfect student? because if I did what you do” she gestured at him “They’d kill me” She finished, looking at him, eyes begging for help, face trying miserably to hide her emotions. Sirius was scared, not even his parents had ever done something of the sort and they creative punishers. So he wrapped her in his arms not wanting to ever let her go, wanting to protect every strand of hair in her head. She melted into his embrace, all of the fear and agony being soothed.

“Oh Merlin Y/n, i’m so sorry” Sirius almost cried when she hugged him back tightly, looking for safety in his arms, the arms she knew so well. After a few moments Sirius said abruptly “Marry me Y/n” he felt her body stiffen “Please, I know you can handle this on your own, but I don’t want you to” he paused, caressing her hair “Please marry me, the Black name should be enough for your parents to accept the union, just let me take care of you, please” 

For the first time, Y/n didn’t protest, she just nodded and buried her head on his chest, she knew this plan was reckless and would make her parents angry, but she couldn’t control herself, it was like her body couldn’t take the pain anymore. “Y/n, go find James, he’s outside. I’ll talk with Malfoy, please just go, ok?” He kissed her forehead, as she stood up and went to find James.

Sirius went back to the dining room and explained that Y/n had to go home, because she would refuse Lucius’ proposal. The Malfoys were startled and outraged, she didn’t even have the guts to tell them herself? She had to bring another boy? It was all a waste of time and i’d be a disgrace for the Malfoy name if someone found out their son were rejected by a Watson, but surprisingly Sirius managed to convince them, no one created excuses as good as him. Surprisingly the Malfoys didn’t try to stop him, it was a miracle, even though they couldn’t do anything since Y/n wasn’t their daughter and it’d make a scene that could ruin their reputation, that wouldn’t last long though, they needed to run, because they would certainly contact Y/n’s parents to give a piece of their minds, it was a deal after all, they didn’t understand what happened.

“Well then Mr. Black, we hope everything’s turns out to be fine” Mrs. Malfoy politely sneered with a wave of goodbye.

“Eh-hm Thank you Mrs. Malfoy, we’re sorry for the inconvenience” Sirius said a bit nervous, leaving the room as quickly as he could.

While Sirius was talking with the Malfoys, Y/n was running to the front gate where James was waiting for her. “Y/n/n!” He shouted as he saw her running his way, when she arrived he wrapped her in a bear hug lifting her off the ground. “I’m so glad you’re okay” he said warmly, form this day on, feeling her fear as she hugged him back James considered her his sister and she considered him her brother, since he protected her, risked a rescue when she needed the most, that meant the world. 

“I’m glad to see you too Prongs” she chuckled lightly at his protective brother hug.

“Here” he said pointing to his broomstick “We’re going together, to my house, when Sirius arrive” she nodded climbing up the broom behind him.

James and Y/n were already waiting, ready to leave, when Sirius showed up getting on his broom saying “Let’s go, let’s go before they warn your parents” and taking off, James following right after. Riding their brooms fast against the cold winter air, happy that their mental plan had worked. When the trio arrived at the Potters, James’ mom was in the garden, certainly not expecting her son and his friend to arrive with a h/c girl with e/c eyes stained with tears.

“James, care to explain?” His mother asked unable to hide her surprise, but going to help the girl and try to calm her down “Let’s go inside, i’ll make you some tea sweetie and you two will explain me what happened” she said looking at the boys.

So, once inside, the boys explained what Y/n was going through and how she was being tortured and forced to marry Malfoy. Euphemia, was disgusted with Y/n’s parents, she had heard of their reputations before but this was cruel. During the whole explanation Y/n was quiet, riding out of her shock, they guessed, until she spoke and everyone went silent “I need to to my house” she said so low it was almost inaudible, they were sure they had heard it wrong but then she said it louder this time “I need to go home before things get worse” the room went silent.

“You’re not going back there Y/n” Sirius was the first to talk, desperation in his voice.

“They’ll kill me if I don’t go back” 

“There, One more reason, it’s not safe” James added, but she insisted.

Sirius stopped, looking at her “Ok then, I’m going with you, after I pay mommy dear a visit. Can you wait only until that? i’ll be as quick as possible” 

“Yeah Y/n wait a little and calm down, you can stay here until he comes back” James said patting her shoulder gently.

“No, I don’t want to bother your parents, I’m fine” she said shyly, earning a shrug from Mrs. Potter “-and I-i don’t know how long it’ll take until my parents find out i left the Malfoys, it’s too risky” 

“Dear, calm down, there’s no problem in you staying here, I promise, wait for Sirius, he’ll be there for you, your parents are not going to hurt you. If your plan doesn’t work then you can stay here with us, just rest for a bit” Euphemia said with a motherly smile on her face.

“But Sirius don’t you think your parents will be warned too?” Y/n tried to protest but James’ mom was already showing her to her room.

Y/n was so tired from the restless nights at the Malfoys, from the fear she constantly felt that Lucius would do something to her and from her parents, that when Euphemia offered the guest room and put her there, she drifted to sleep as soon as her head hit the pillow. Sirius caressed her hair and laid beside for a minute to make sure she was alright after the turbulent events from the break.

While she slept he told James about his plan to marry her, He was a Black, her parents would certainly be pleased with the union if the anger from the Malfoy incident passed and his parents would never refuse to wed him with a Watson, it’d be like refusing royalty, maybe it’d be difficult to explain the latest incident but anyway it was the offer of a lifetime. “Wow, Sirius are you sure? I mean, I want to save Y/n too, but- this, are you sure? This whole marriage thing is mental” James gasped.

“Her parents won’t let her stay here, they’ll try to get her back and make her marry someone else, since we humiliated Lucius, they won’t stop, I know how these people get” Sirius stated “But if I go to my parents and convince them to ask her hand to the Watsons, since she’s not officially betrothed to anyone yet, not only they’ll be thrilled but they’ll also do anything to convince her parents. And my parents would Betroth me one day too so this is just the best option for both of us” James couldn’t argue, it was a good plan in the rough.

“So you’re getting married, that’s serious” James teased “Our dear friend Y/n/n will be future Mrs. Black” he laughed hard at Sirius’ blushed face. “Oh Merlin!” He pointed a finger to Sirius “You like her! You- fancy Y/n, Merlin” James was so excited “It all makes sense, this friends with benefits thing would never work and that’s why you’re so relaxed about marrying her, because you fancy Y/N/N, Merlin!” 

“No I don’t, shove off Prongs, you’re hallucinating, we’re friends” The blush on his face wasn’t ignored by James, who laughed harder “Now, i need to go home and convince mommy Black to talk to the Watsons” Sirius cut James off, leaving the room heading to the hell he called home.

“Whatever you say Pads” James yelled from the kitchen.

---------------------------

taglist: @msmb​ ❤️

[thinkingimmensely]

Like An Open Book XI

Part 1 | Part 10

A/N: Hi! How’s everyone been doing? I think this chapter’s kind of long, not sure if it’s longer than the last one though. Also, I’ve been working on a James Potter x Reader oneshot that’s already over 4k words HAHAHA, I’m nearly done with it (I think), so that’s one thing to look forward to~! uwu

IDK if it’s just me or is tumblr messing up the tags thingy? Because I can’t seem to tag some people. But anyway, if I’m missing anyone or if you want to be added to the taglist, please dm me or comment down below or even send me an ask so I can include you! <3

MASTERLIST

Disclaimer: I don’t own anything from the Potterverse!

___________________

He couldn’t meet your eyes. James Potter had been avoiding you and you were devastated. You were proud of yourself at how well you hid your inner turmoil since no one said anything, until Remus and you were sitting alone outside in the lawn that is.  

You sat beneath a tree, shielding yourself from the afternoon sun. The others were busy in a competition on who could throw the gnomes the farthest. Though however tempting it was to join in, you settled for relaxing since you didn’t want to soil James’ good mood. Remus, wanting to get some reading done, opted to join you.  

“I’m going home tomorrow.” You told him.  

Remus looked at you in surprise, as if you just dropped a bomb. “What?” He closed his book and set it aside, “Why? We’re supposed to spend two weeks here. We have a week left.”

You pulled your legs up to your chest and hugged yourself, “I just... I think I’ve overstayed my welcome.” You shrugged; you tried to act nonchalant about it but you knew he could very well see your anxiety behind your orbs.  

Remus furrowed his brows, “Why would you ever think that? Y/N, everyone wants you to be here.”

You shook your head, “I don’t think James does.” You mumbled, you didn’t want to but tears still prickled at the edges of your orbs. Remus heard you all the same. “He knows, Rem. He knows and now he can’t even look at me.” Going home to the family who all but ignored you was better than being rejected by the person who used to welcome you with open arms. “It’s been two days and he all but flees whenever I enter the same room as him. He can’t stand it, and I won’t force him to.”

“I’ll go talk to him.” Remus was about to stand up but you grabbed his arm and held him down.  

“It’s okay.” You told him, giving off a sad smile.  Remus looked conflicted but settled down nonetheless. He held your hand fondly and gave it a squeeze in reassurance, which you were grateful for. He let out a deep sigh and opened his book again.

-

You set down your quill as you folded the piece of parchment and packed it inside an envelope. You sealed it with melted wax and a stamp and handed it to the white barn-owl that perched itself on your windowsill. It was a reply to the Dumbledore’s letter to you; you had written to him immediately after returning to the Potter’s residence two days ago, your hands clammy with nerves, and your ears ringing from everything. You opened his reply once again.

Dear Miss Y/L/N,  

It is a surprise to hear of your connection to the recent incident, and I must commend how you and the others fought off the Death Eaters and helped the Aurors, though extremely reckless it was. I believe Voldemort already knows of your identity and would be ever pursuant of his current interest in you. He will try to get you to join him again, and you must stay vigilant. He will not do anything as long as you remain a student of Hogwarts, but I believe it best to relocate your family soon, in case he catches winds about your residence. If you decide to do so, I will, of course, send help.  

Take care,

Albus Dumbledore

You rubbed your forehead as you read the letter again, chastising yourself for being so stupid. Dumbledore was right, Voldemort had enough connections to easily know who you were, and you not only put yourself in danger, but now so is your family. They had to move, and you had to leave them to keep them safe. He won’t be able to do anything as long as you still went to Hogwarts, the notion was comforting yet ominous, because what would happen the moment you graduated?

The ministry was abuzz since ten muggles were murdered that night, and more people severely injured. The Muggle Prime Minister struggled to make believable alibis and he couldn’t give out an adequate one was it not for the help of the Minister of Magic. You tapped your fingers on the mahogany desk. You wondered if Severus was able to escape unscathed, but you shook your head at the thought; of course, he would go unscathed, he knew about the attack beforehand after all. You bit your lower lip; he had tried to protect you- you know that now. You may still be able to sway him away from the dark path he seemed all too eager to walk on.  

You packed what little you had and zipped your bag close. Now all that was left was to tell the others during dinner. You decided that saying that your mum wanted you home immediately because she heard what had happened at the concert and was concerned for your safety was a good enough excuse.  

A knock came from your door and before you could even walk towards it, it creaked open and James came in. He glanced at your packed bag on the bed and turned to look at you, his eyes wide in shock. He took two long strides towards you and pulled you into a hug. “I’m sorry.” His voice shook as he buried his face on the crook of your neck. His breath tickled but you were utterly confused to be focused on that right now.  

“I’m sorry.” He repeated. “I’ve been so stupid, and you didn’t deserve the way I avoided you. I don’t want you to leave, if I had my way, I’d want you to never leave.” He pulled away but still held you by the shoulders. His hazel eyes searched yours for something you didn’t know. “You see- what I’m trying to say is... is that I don’t care if you’re a Legilimens. I don’t care if you know every little thing about me, if you can read my mind this very instant, I don’t care. I will never turn my back on you again, never. I hold you too dearly.” You just noticed how his hands were shaking, you took them from your shoulders and held them.

“James, I-” You were about to say but someone cleared their throat by the doorway which made you all but drop his hands and your gaze immediately.  

“Uh- s-sorry to bother, b-but your mum wants to know what you want to have for di-dinner, Prongs.” Peter stammered. Sirius snickered from behind him while Remus tried to hold in his laughter as well.  

You flushed a deep shade of red as you turned away from them, hands on your warming cheeks. “Out! All of you!” James had snapped, and the boys went running away in snickers. You turned back to him and found him pretty much in the same state as you were in, flushed cheeks and all that.  

He cleared his throat, “So um, please don’t go home... yet...” He added the last word like an afterthought, as if realizing that, yes, you still have a family who might be wondering where you were if you wouldn’t return. You nodded and he grinned at you. “I’ll, um... see you at dinner then?”

“Uh-huh.” You sheepishly replied and he bit his lower lip then turned to go out, leaving the door open.  

-

“So Y/N, will you tell me what every girl at Hogwarts thinks about me next time?” Sirius grinned as all of you laid on top of the roof, watching the stars. It was a clear night, perfect for star gazing, and you took the opportunity to do so.  

You let out a dry laugh, “Of course not, Siri. What fun would that be for your conquests?” Sirius and Peter had learned of your ‘gift’ when they were busy eavesdropping earlier, and like Remus had done so long ago, the rest of the Marauders had sworn themselves to secrecy regarding your ability.  

Sirius chuckled, twirling his wand between his fingers, “Point taken.”

You stared at the twinkling stars that shone millions of miles away and listened to the voices of your friends. You wished time would stop in this moment. You wished all of you would stay like this forever... young and free; unbothered by the looming war that plagued your lives.  

You sat up as reality started sinking in. The screams of people dying too haunting to be forgotten, and the pale face of the Auror who only tried to protect you. You never even knew his name. You felt a warm jacket wrap around you, and you turned to see James beside you, a soft smile on his face.  

“Thank you.” You murmured. The others continued on their conversation while James adjusted the glasses on the bridge of his nose.  

“I remember it too.” He told you as he ruffled his hair. You cast him a questioning gaze, prompting him to elaborate; “The concert, I mean. Sometimes I still hear the screams and see the flashes of green when I close my eyes.”

You held his hand and gave it a small squeeze which made him smile. “I reckon the five of us will carry this memory for the rest of our lives.” You pointed out sadly.  

He nodded, “True. But I feel a little better knowing that you guys will be with me through it.” He told you and you could feel your heart move by the sincerity of his words that tears prickled at the corner of your eyes.

You wouldn’t be dealing with all these emotions alone, not anymore, and that very notion comforted you greatly. You scooted closer to James and leaned your head on his shoulder, and he instantly wrapped an arm around you.  You sighed in content, because at this very moment, all was well.   “That reminds me,” You started, “You never told me why you were avoiding me so adamantly.” You turned to look up at him, backtracking when he was already looking at you, your faces inches away from each other. You recoiled and he dropped his hand from your shoulder, a deep red penetrating his features.  

He cleared his throat, “I’ll tell you someday. Promise you won’t search for the answer yourself?” Tapping his head with his index finger.

You laughed, “I’ll try.”

The rest of the summer had passed by rather uneventfully as you returned home a couple days later. You had set up some enchantments on your home the moment you arrived with the help of Professor Flitwick, who arrived a few moments after you. He thought you the charms and reinforced them for better durability.  

Your mother had invited him for tea, but he politely refused, saying that he must visit other households and left in a hurry. Your family, except your youngest sister, looked at him rather curiously and you were glad they didn’t voice out their apparent discomfort. They had also watched you and your professor in awe from the living room window as you casted the spells.

Now you sat on a chair by the dinner table as your mother rubbed her temples and your step-father tried to take in everything you just said; you had explained to them why there was a need to enchant your home.

“So... you’re saying that... that a lunatic is out there causing havoc?” You step-father asked hesitantly.

“Well he’s not just any lunatic, he’s public enemy number one in our world.” You pointed out. “And he’s not just causing any havoc, he’s killing people. Muggles, non-wizard people.” You elaborated once more, “You guys are the very kind of people he’ll be after, and I’m only telling you all these because I want you guys to be safe.” The tea had long gone cold and a tense silence hung in the air. Your two siblings were sent to bed early for you guys to have this conversation, but you weren’t surprised to hear your stepsister eavesdropping at the top of the stairs.  

"Y/N, are you sure we’re safe here?” Your mother questioned, gathering her thoughts together. She, at least, understood the gravity of the situation. You knew she liked to read the Daily Prophet when you were done with it, and you were aware she didn’t skip the latest news about the Dark Wizard.

You frowned, letting out a deep sigh, “He wants me to join his cause.” You admitted, and the color of your mother’s face drained. You took her outstretched hand and gave it a squeeze, a gesture that brought tears to her eyes, it had been years since you initiated any sort of physical contact with her. “I won’t join him; I assure you that.” You swore. “Dumbledore is certain he won’t come looking for me until I graduate. By then I’ll be out of this house and the lot of you will be moving somewhere far from here.”

Realization dawned on their faces, “You’re leaving? Why? Wouldn’t it be safer if you went with us?”

You shook your head, choosing not to answer.

 I have gathered a group of people who are willing to oppose the Dark Lord himself and thwart his plans, Miss Y/L/N, and I am formally extending an invitation for you to be part of that said group. It will be dangerous and it will require courage, you will not only be part of the heart of the war, your life will be on the line and your skills will no doubt be put to the test time and time again. But this will all be for the greater good, so I prompt you to at least consider it.

“Y/N?”

Your thoughts broken, you looked at the both of them who shared a look of concern at your lack of reply. “It’ll be better this way. This will all be for the greater good.”  

You left the dinner table at that, and sought solace in your bedroom, glad that your step-sister had retreated to her own room just as you finished your conversation. You locked your door and got your potions textbook and cauldron out of your trunk. You searched the table of contents and smirked bitterly as you found the page you were looking for:

Chapter 16: Memory Potion . . . . . . . . . . . . 394

-

“Y/N!” Lily yelled as she run to you and wrapped her arms around you, “I missed you!” The two of you reunited at King’s Cross Station, the Hogwarts Express right in front of you, smoke bellowing, getting ready for the journey to Hogwarts. Chatter rang out the entire station as friends reunited after without seeing each other for the entire summer.  

You chortled and returned the hug, “It’s so good to see you again Lily.”  

“What, no hug for me?”  

The two of you broke the hug to look at the messy-haired boy smirk at the both of you. Lily rolled her emerald orbs heavenward, “Sod off, Potter.”

James chuckled at her, “Feisty as ever I see.” He then turned to you and smiled, “Y/N.”

You nodded at him, “James.” It has been three weeks since you last saw him and it feels like it’s been forever.

Lily eyed the both of you, her eyes wide as if formulating something. She instantly grabbed you and pulled you away as Sirius called out to the three of you, much to the confusion of the boys. “Did something happen between the both of you?” She interrogated.  

You furrowed your brows, “What?”

She giggled excitedly, “You and James I mean!” She whispered-yelled. “Is there something going on that I should know about?!”  

“Um, I don’t think so?” You denied, because really, there wasn’t, wasn’t there?  

She pulled you further away, “I saw the way you two looked at each other! If there’s something going on between the both of you, I’m all in for it!”

“Lily didn’t you call him an arrogant toerag before?” You raised a brow at her.

“Oh please, that was before we all got to become friends!” She turned to look at the boys, Remus and Peter had already arrived and the four of them were talking animatedly with each other as if they haven’t seen each other for years. “I’m just saying, I think the both of you make a fine pair now that I see you guys again. It’s like a spell had been cast during summer break that changed everyone’s demeanor.”

Ah that was right, Lily didn’t know what happened yet. You had avoided writing to her about what happened since you didn’t want to worry her, and also you didn’t want to relive the memories. Your expression may have changed since Lily went from excited to concerned in an instant, “What is it? What’s wrong?” She questioned.  

“I need to tell you something...” You trailed off but before you could go into your story-telling, the train chimed out. It was time to go.  

The boys headed your way, “Ladies,” James uttered and grabbed your trunk from your hands. You tried to get it back from him but it was futile, which only made Lily cast you another knowing smirk. You frowned at her in reply.

“We have to go to the Prefects compartment.” Lily informed you as she and Remus stopped midway.

“Oh, right. Sure.” You nodded, “I’ll talk to you later then?”  

The redhead smiled at you, “Of course.” They then walked off towards the other end of the train while you, Peter, Sirius, and James easily found an empty compartment and went inside. You stood by the doorway while the boys placed the trunks up, and entered when they were done.  

James took his seat beside you while Sirius and Peter sat on the opposite side. The train took off a few minutes later, and you leaned your head on the window glass, looking at the vast terrain. The boys chatted on, paying no heed to your lack of input to their conversation.  

The cart lady soon did her rounds around the train, and James and Peter got up to buy some sweets. Sirius nudged you with his foot and you shot him a look, “What?”

He chuckled, “Nothing. It’s just- you're real quiet today. Is everything all right?”

“Of course. I... I just have a lot on my mind right now.” You confessed.

Sirius gave you a sad smile. “Well, don’t get consumed by those thoughts. We’re here for you aright?” He pulled the sleeves of his sweater.  

“Sirius?”

“Hm?”

You folded your hands together in your laps, glancing outside where the others were still busy picking the sweets they want. “We both know you’re more troubled than I am. Do you want to talk about it?”

Sirius stopped pulling his sleeves instantly, “I almost forgot you’re a Legilimens.” He chortled lowly, but it held no actual mirth. “I was disowned, kicked out of the house- with all that burning of my picture in the family tree.” He shook his head as if he found it absolutely ridiculous, “I think Bella told them about our little encounter during the concert incident and that flipped them how I could stand against the Dark Lord himself and their cause. So now I live with James apparently. It’s fine though, if anything, I’m glad to be rid of all that pureblood supremacy nonsense.”

You frowned deeply; his pureblood fanatic family was not foreign to you. You knew, since before, that Sirius suffered immensely in his household, and it made your family life all the much better. “You’re worried about your brother?” You surmised.

He nodded slowly, “They’re poisoning his mind, they are. He’s my little brother and I couldn’t even protect him. I can’t stop him from walking down that path...”

Your heart ached from the familiarity, you leaned back on your seat, “Well... all we can do is not give up now.” You told him, and he understood. He understood that the both of you were in a similar boat, and that made him smile genuinely and nod. You were thankful about the fact that he didn’t even comment about how he knew you were talking about Severus. You knew they weren’t on the best terms but you were worried he might convince you to forget about that snake. That he wasn’t worth it.

James and Peter came back with their hands full with sweet treats and they set it down on the cushions. “Take anything you want.” James told you and you looked through the candies and chocolates. You took a cauldron cake, thanking him.  

Halfway before arriving to Hogwarts, you all started to change into your robes. You had to leave the compartment to change at the comfort room all the way down the train hallway while the boys had no trouble pulling their sweaters over their heads.  

“Wouldn’t mind if you changed here, Y/N.” Sirius wiggled his brows at you but yelped when James threw his robes at him.  

“Hi, Y/N.” A girl with ginger hair and warm brown eyes greeted you as you waited in line for your turn to change in the bathroom. “I’m Marlene McKinnon; we share the same dorm?” She introduced herself when you just stared at her.  

You shook your head, “Oh sorry, I know who you are, I’m just a little surprised is all. We’ve never really talked before.” She was nervous, she didn’t think she would ever get to talk to you as well.

She chuckled lightly, “We haven’t, haven’t we? I’m sorry about that; but I hope to rectify that, Lily’s friend is our friend of course.” She gestured to the person inside the room who just came out.  

“Oh, hi Y/N.” Mary Macdonald greeted, already in her robes, a kind smile on her face.  

“You can change first Y/N.” Marlene told you; you thanked her, not wanting to make it awkward.  

You closed the door behind you and discarded your sweater. You could faintly hear Marlene and Mary chatting in the other side of the door, it was a good thing they weren’t talking about you. Was it going to be like this from now on? You wondered. Were your housemates going to make pleasant conversation with you just because you were friends with Lily and the Marauders? Somehow the thought of not being ostracized by your own house anymore wasn’t so bad.  

You came out after changing and Marlene went in afterwards. You smiled at Mary, in which she returned the gesture and you made your way back to your compartment. You passed by a group of snickering students, and when you turned to glance, you frowned deeply as you took note of their green robes. It was Mulciber and his little gang; their compartment door was slightly open and they passed around the daily prophet. You squinted in disgust and continued on, missing the way Severus looked as you walked away from inside the compartment.

You dragged the door open and found your three friends tossing Fizzing Whizbees at each other and catching it with their mouths. “Does anyone have a copy of today’s Daily Prophet?” You questioned, interrupting their game as you took your seat beside James.  

“I might have one.” Peter replied, swallowing the candy, and got up the seats to reach for his trunk.  

“Did something happen?” James looked at you in question.

“I don’t know yet.” You answered. Peter fished out the newspaper from his trunk and threw it to you, which you expertly caught. You immediately skimmed through the headlines while the blonde boy closed his trunk and flopped down on his seat.  

Sirius and James huddled closer towards you to check the newspaper, and you arrived at the latest news about the Dark Lord. It said that there were three more attacks, all in different locations throughout the country. Your face paled at the list of casualties, the war wasn’t just starting, it was at its height already, you realized.  

The atmosphere in the compartment turned grim. Sirius took the newspaper from your hands and crumpled it up and threw it outside the window. “It’s nothing new. People die every day.” He shrugged then took a packet of Bertie Bott’s Every Flavour Beans and ripped it open. “Here, Peter, I dare you to eat this.” He handed the boy an earth-colored bean.  

You sighed, all of you coped in a different way, you concluded. Though not particularly healthy, denial was one way to go about it. But you weren’t one to talk since the way you stressed about it all the time couldn’t be considered healthy as well.  

You felt eyes on you and you turned to see James looking at you. You cocked your head to your side in question and there was a waver in his gaze. He felt hurt; he wanted to know what you were thinking about and it pained him to see you build walls around yourself once more. You turned away from him, guilt creeping onto your conscience.  

___________________

LAOB Taglist:

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Permanent Taglist: @oreofrappiewithblueberry​ , @coffeeismylife28​ , @yllwtaxi​ , @tb-cbn , @aunicornmademedoit

[paleangels13]

✏️🌈🌾 🎨

Thank you ☺️💖

✏️ The first fanfiction you ever wrote? (doesn’t have to be a posted fic)

A Borussia Dortmund/BVB (German soccer team) fic, pairing Own Female Character(s) x Player(s). Had 197 chapters i think and was posted on Instagram (because that's apparently what you did in 2014...post on ig and wattpad :')). But they were short chapters, I still wrote around 1 1/2 years or 2 years on it 🤔 (I think in 'normal'/average chapter length (like... Up to 2000 words?) it would probably have 80+ chapters?).

I'm very much cringing about it now but the feedback back then was really good soo... Idk different times 😂😭

🌈 Your favorite tropes to write about?

Already answered here

🌾 A fic you really want to write but you haven’t (yet)?

Ohh, I kinda answered that here when I answered the question about ideas I haven't done anything with but let me just put a few from my "really wanna write" list here:

Pole dancer AU (characters, etc are fully planned out just gotta start writing...which I've been telling myself for 3 months now...)

Escort AU (which I already started quite a while ago but had to put it on hold because I struggled to continue from where I left it and have to overthink it again)

Joonas the tourist guide

Third part of the toxic series

Quite a few angsty/dark fics from my chat with @bc-sideblog :DD

A Joel/Johnny/Aleksi/Robin one because I'm a mess but I won't spoiler anything (might be part of the same universe as my "baby if I let you in (...)" fic)

One involving a blindfold 👀

Someone wearing a corset and platform boots 🥰

Someone else (not Joel this time) wearing a dress ✨😌

... Way too many more :))

🎨 Show us a sneak peek from a WIP!

Ohh... I didn't know which one to choose from... ☹️

I think I'll give you two snippets because I don't even know if I'll ever finish the first one even tho I really, really want to 🥺

Sooo (not beta read or anything) under the cut because it got quite long (and well spoilers)...

Escort AU:

He had uploaded a morning picture to his, well, adult website and was curious to see if there had been any comments so far. It was the usual stuff: "pretty boy", "mind turning a bit more next time? ;)", "oh, I sure would like to join you in the shower. We could have some fun while we're at it". Aleksi huffed and shook his head. One comment caught his attention though. To be fair, it wasn't an actual comment, just a bunch of random letters and numbers. He raised an eyebrow and clicked on the notification to reply something: "I take it my pic got you a little excited, sweetheart? Hope you had fun 💋". The young man chuckled a little and put his phone back on the sink before focusing on getting ready. It didn't really matter if his suspicion was correct or not, he knew most people subscribed to his account to get pics and possibly videos they could use to get off, what about it? That was kind of the point, right? So he didn't actually mind or think about it too much. It is what it is, and he enjoyed knowing what effect he had on some guys. 

Mhh...Tommi taking care of Joel 👀🥰:

Not even an hour had passed, yet the table was now filled with more than two empty drinks, mainly beer, and Joel was a tint drunker than he had originally planned.

“We should go to bed.”

“Mhh…”

His gaze flickered over to the drummer, rising from the sofa and his head unwantedly reminded him – very vividly – of how long he had not had sex. Well, technically that wasn't entirely correct. Joonas had given him a blowjob in the bathroom backstage not so long ago. Very blurred he also remembered that something had happened between himself and Niko, but that was already weeks ago. But this wasn't what he had in mind. If he had wanted a quick fuck while being the top, he only needed to ask their guitarist, who'd undoubtedly be happy to help with that. No, he wanted to be driven mad by someone, wanted that person to help him relax a bit and forget about the troubles of the past few days. Oh, and how perfectly the drummer seemed to fit into this role right now. Joel took the hand that Tommi held out for him, and stood up. He shook his head over his own thoughts. This was bullshit. His thoughts were blurred by the alcohol he had consumed and the fact that he hadn't had sex in a while probably didn't help either. He wouldn't sleep with the taller one. Definitely not!

[human-person234]

LOL ok here's a chapter, oops, my bad, sorry guys. Glad to be back.

I'm actually feeling quite motivated to write, so I'm optimistic about finishing this fic before I hit my next major wall, but no promises--I've learned my lesson about setting expectations too high for myself. I do, at least, have the next chapter partly written, and the rest of the fic planned out.

I'm not here to give a whole sob story or make excuses--I know I don't need to. Y'all are great. But if you're curious, read on, and I'll tell you the gist of what's going on and give you some more detailed thoughts on this new chapter and where the fic is headed.

I never stopped wanting to write this fic! Like, I think about it nearly every day. I certainly didn't stop reading fanfiction, although I delved into quite a few different fandoms over the last few months. But for whatever reason, I just couldn't write.

There was writer's block, definitely--I got frustrated with how the plot got away from me in places, how my lack of planning meant I had to dig for inconsistencies, how I got bogged down in the details.

But I was also mad depressed, and writing about suicide was not a good way to deal with it, at the time. Like, last year, when I wrote Wish I Hadn't Got So Much Better, that was cathartic, because I was feeling that way. Like, I was counting my pills. Read the fic. Idk. But then, I started to get a little better. I moved, and stopped breathing mold 24/7, and things were looking up.

But reading and writing about suicide were like picking at the wound, keeping it open. I thought I'd take a little time, recover, and then go back to it. I started looking for a therapist.

Then, someone who is very very close to me very nearly committed suicide. I dropped everything and hopped on a train (dedicated readers might remember Izuku's thoughts about Shouto in Wish I Hadn't Got So Much Better) and for a while, I was so focused on my best friend, I tried not to think about me.

But, like Shouta said at some point in this fic, there's something intoxicating about despair. It's dangerous, for people like us, who spend our lives fighting in its hold.

Anyway, I'm in therapy now. I'm not going to kill myself. But I got kind of close there a few times, you know?

But I've talked to my therapist (I really like her!) about how I use reading ansty fics as both catharsis and self harm, and she's helped me. I'm eating better. I'm starting a new job soon. We're past the darkest night of the year (literally--I hate winter).

And I started reading my own fics, and the comments. I remembered how much fun it was. I got caught up in the story again, remembered how many things I'd written that I didn't get to post yet. I thought of things I could have done better.

So I started a note on my phone, which was how this whole thing started in the first place, and today before bed I just...opened the document. It felt like such a hurdle every day of these past five months, and it was so easy??? But like my therapist said, I don't need to stress about what I "need" to do, I'll do it when I'm ready and capable of doing it. And I did!

I do think I'm going to make a few edits to the older chapters, but nothing major. I probably will do a comprehensive edit at some point, but eventually I want to get to some of the other fics rattling around in my brain. I want to milk as much pain out of this au as I can, first.

I thought starting this chapter would be hard, because of the gap. But I opened the document, and I'd already written a page at some point in the past few months. And it just started flowing? I only stopped because I have to go to sleep.

I really need to go to sleep. Just a few more things. Damn this post is too long. No edits, sorry.

I previously had a basic outline for the rest of the story, but I've fleshed it out a bit, and done myself some favors in terms of planning for consistency and saving myself work later on.

I also started a section in the outline labeled "painful nuggets to include" and it's just little snippets of ideas or phrases or details that are especially agonizing. I'm going to build the rest of the fic around those nuggets. I'm so excited.

Thank you for having me back! Happy to be here.

[that-sarcastic-writer]

Once upon a time in NYU- MGG AU

Fandom: MGG, Criminal Minds

Pairing: College!Matthew X College!Reader

Summary: you couldn't stand Matthew, and he couldn't stand you. But you couldn't say the same when you were in his bed

Warnings: alternative universe, enemies to lovers relationship, cursing duh, hair pulling, fingering, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, bad writing basically

WC: 6.1k 

A/N: so I saw I think it was @eideticmemory​ write an enemies to lovers college fic and like a light just went on in my head, and I really wanted to that because I've always wanted to, but also give it my own twist and touch of course, so I guess this my attempt at writing a multi-chapter Matthew fic. Will I succeed? Probably not. But it's a good excuse to write smut after a year so we'll see. ALSO HUGE TW I understand posting this now might be a bit of a bad timing. So if you think that reading this will trigger you in any way, just go ahead and skip this one. I dont want to trigger anyone in any way, I just want to entertain you guys and myself in the process so yeah, read at your own risk and please please stay safe. And this is going to be a bit long so strap in yall and enjoy the poorly written sin. 

Andddd huge huge thanks to my friend Kara (idk if shes reading this but yeah) for helping me edit this, she helped me make this so much better for you guys and she literally so amazing for actually spending the time to help me. So yeah, 

You know when something bad happens, you’re always told to see the bright side of things? That maybe that unfortunate event isn’t as bad as you feel it is? Yeah, well, that doesn’t always apply, and it certainly didn’t when I found out I was partnered with the one person I was hoping I wouldn’t get paired with for my end of the semester film project. 

Seriously, out of the nearly hundred students that were enrolled in my film class, I had to get paired up with him, him out of all people, literally the one person I was praying wouldn't get paired up with. Not only because I was forced to work with someone, because honestly all I wanted was to work alone, I had to get paired with Matthew fucking Gubler.

You know when people say God has his favourites? Yeah, well I certainly wasn't one of them.

Now, I didn’t necessarily hate Matthew Gubler. I didn't hate him for no reason, I didn't just wake up one day and decided I was just going to hate Matthew. There was a time where I actually liked him, I liked him more than I'd like to admit, deep down I still did. And I knew he liked me too, he did then at least. And we were good together, it was fun, we had a fun first couple of dates. To this day, they were the nicest dates I ever had, because he knew just how to make them special. I mean, when a guy takes you to the Neue Galerie here in New York and have nice long walk through Central Park, a walk filled with laughter and bliss, it has to be special, and in a weird way, he was special too. 

And as much as I wanted more than just two or three dates, I would've been perfectly fine if he had told me what he wanted from the start. If he had suddenly changed his mind about me, I would've accepted it, and I would've been able to live a happy life as his friend if that's what he wanted.

But he didn't, and instead I found out he had other interests. And I didn't hear it from him, I heard it from my friend. She didn't even need to tell me who it was, because the minute she told me where he took her, I knew. He took her to the same place he took me not even two weeks later and then acted like I was nothing the next time he saw me. And my god did that fucking hurt. It hurt me in a way I had never been hurt before, because I thought he was different, I was hoping he was. And convincing myself that I hated him was much easier than facing the fact that it hurt. And I never addressed it ever again, not that Matthew cared enough to actually talk about us, or, whatever we were. So instead we just made each other's existence miserable.

No, what I felt for Matthew wasn't hate, it was just the strong need to stay ten feet away from him so I wouldn't shove a five foot pole up his ass. That's how I felt about Matthew Gubler.

And now, here I was, aggressively shoving my laptop and notebook into my bag so I could leave the auditorium as quickly as possible, or at least quick enough to avoid Matthew, because knowing how he was, he would come straight to me to rub our partnership in my face. And I was right, because the minute we were dismissed, I spotted his lanky frame starting to come down from the top rows where he usually sat, and he was headed my way.

Screaming a big nope in my head, I strapped my bag over my shoulder and headed straight for the exit. I knew I couldn't avoid him forever, especially now but, I just needed a minute to mentally prepare myself to deal with him, a minute and probably a bottle of booze. But I didn't get either because the minute I was out those doors, I heard the unmistakable sound of his voice calling my name. 

Great.

"Y/N! Y/N wait!" I heard Matthew call out, followed my rushed footsteps coming from behind me.

"Hey, partner, I'm glad I caught you before you left. You weren't trying to run away from me were you?" He teased, throwing one of his particularly long arms over my shoulder.

If I had rolled my eyes any harder they probably would've gotten stuck there. I groaned, grabbing a hold of his arm and unwrapping it not so subtly before dropping it beside him, "first of all, I'd really appreciate it if you didn't touch me,  and second of all, just please go away, Matthew. I have a class I have to get to." I muttered, walking slightly faster and keeping my gaze forward, refusing to even look at him.

If there was something I've learned about Matthew in the two long years I've known him is that he usually goes away on his own if I don't give him the attention he wanted. I was hoping this was one of those times, because I was not in the mood to deal with him right now.

But alas, he didn't, he walked faster, staying beside me the whole time. "But I wasn't even doing anything. I was just saying hi." He defended, and I could just hear the smile on his face even when I wasn't even looking at him. 

I rolled my eyes harder, letting out a small breath through my lips, "what do you want Matthew?"

"When can we meet up? I already have an idea for our project and I think you're going to love it."

I chuckled sarcastically, finding his words actually hilarious, "If you came up with it I seriously doubt it." I sighed heavily, digging my teeth into my bottom lip before speaking, "tonight after I finish my shift, I guess. The quicker we can start, the quicker we can get it over with, soo..."

"Great. It's a date then, see you tonight, sweetheart." He hummed, ghosting his lips over my ear, his lips smacking loudly as he pretended to kiss it before he quickly took off in the other direction before I could even say anything.

This fucking guy.

~~~~~~~~~~

"I seriously do not understand how you fucking dated this guy, he's so obnoxious and annoying, how could anyone want to date someone like that." I complained to my friend and roommate Liz. I met her for a quick lunch break before my afternoon class and I just had to let her know how unhappy I was about my partnership with Matthew. She was amused to say the least.

"You make it sound like we dated for years, we dated for a few months, but he's not even that bad." she argued.

I rolled my eyes, crossing my arms over my chest and leaned back into my seat with an unamused expression, just waiting for Liz to bury herself further up Matthew's ass. I always had the feeling she still had feelings for him, as much as she insisted it was just a meaningless relationship. And as much as they were just friends now, I just knew she wanted more with him. But it wasn't really my place to question that, not that it mattered to me anyway.

"He's a pretty cool and fun guy to be around, you just never gave him a chance. You've hated him ever since you met him for absolutely no reason, you never gave yourself the chance to get to know him better." Liz insisted, she always did. She always insisted Matthew was such a great guy I never gave the change to get to know. 

I had let out a heavy sigh in annoyance of her defense of Matthew before responding, "yeah well, it doesn't really matter since I'm being forced to anyway. And he's coming over tonight to start our project. Can't fucking wait."

I could've sworn I saw Liz's expression change into a mixture of surprise and something I could've easily confused with jealousy. She pursed her lips together and her eyes darted everywhere, like she was avoiding making any kind of eye contact with me.

But, it couldn't be jealousy? What even is there to be jealous of? Her and the whole world knew how I felt about Matthew, her out of all people knew it better than anyone.

"Oh, he is? Well, I'm not really going to be home tonight, I would've given you company so it wouldn't be so awkward with him." She frowned, she sounded disappointed, angry even. She looked uncomfortable, like she was deeply bothered by something, by something I said.

It was weird, I wasn't exactly sure what to say, I wasn't really sure why my news seemed to bother her as much as it did. It's not like I was going to sleep with Matthew while she was away or something. It didn't really matter though, I didn't have time to answer. Thank God.

"I'm sorry Liz but I have to go, I have class in like ten minutes." I excused myself, eating whatever was left on my plate in a matter of seconds before I stood up from my seat and gathered my belongings, "I'll see you later and wish me luck." I said quickly before taking off, not giving her the chance to respond.

~~~~~~~~~~

Usually, I pray for shifts to be over as soon as possible, for it to be slow so I can go home early. Today though, today I prayed for just the opposite. I was hoping the end of my shift wouldn't come, and when it did, that it would be too late and I would be able to cancel my meet up with Matthew.

But like I said, I wasn't one of God's favourites. And today out of all days, it was the slowest it has ever been and my shift ended rather quickly, quicker than I had hoped.

Groaning loudly at the evening that awaited me, I walked down the long halls of my floor, standing outside of my dorm room, dreading my evening already.

Figuring I should just get it over with, I went to get the key on the lock of my door, but noticed it was already unlocked. Liz probably forgot to lock the door, again. I rolled my eyes, shaking my head at my stupid roommate before turning the knob, opening the door. And my jaw dropped the minute I stepped into the room, not believing what my eyes saw.

You've got to be fucking kidding me.

"Matthew, what the fuck are you doing in my dorm and in my bed!? How did you even get in here?" I nearly screamed at the tall brunette that was carelessly laying on my bed with what I figured was one of my books in his hand.

Matthew turned his head towards me, a carefree and calm look plastered all over his face before his eyes went back to the pages in front of him., "oh, well, Liz let me in before she went to work. I hope you don't mind." He responded nonchalantly, continuing to flick through the pages of the book he had in his hand.

I stared at him with absolute disbelief and a loud scoff left my lips as I slightly pitched the bridge of my nose, trying not to throw the nearest object at his face, "yes, I do mind, in fact. You can't just come into somebody's dorm, lie on their bed and go through their stuff. Seriously dude, what is wrong with you?"

I just couldn't believe this guy. He just knew how to get on my nerves without even doing anything. 

Matthew, of course, couldn't have cared any less about whatever I was saying. And it wasn't that he wasn't listening, because he was, he had that stupid smile on his face that proved he was in fact listening to every word I was saying. He just didn't care, or he did, but he just liked getting on my nerves. He loved pushing every single one of my buttons until I snapped. And I had no idea why. I had no idea why he liked annoying me so much.

I exhaled heavily through my nose, closing my eyes slightly as I ran a hand through my hair exasperatedly, "I just can't fucking deal with you. I can't." I huffed, dropping my bag from my shoulder and walked to the opposite side of my room, facing away from him, not even wanting to look at his face.

"Tell me something, sweetheart," Matthew spoke, curiosity and a slight bit of amusement lingering on his words.

"What."

"Why do you hate me so much? You've hated me ever since I dated Liz back in our first year of college and I never truly understood why," he questioned with genuine curiosity, but there was also a certain playfulness in his voice. I opened my mouth to answer, still not facing him, and I was so ready to tell him off, god knows I've been wanting to but he cut me off. "Is it because I never slept with you?"

My eyes instantly widened at his words, a clearly offended scoff leaving my lips as I turned around to face him, "what? No, of course not, I—" my words got caught in my throat when I saw his tall frame towering over me, my eyes getting stuck on his chest before they traveled up to his face, and he was close. Extremely close. I swallowed thickly, feeling slightly cornered by his significantly taller frame so I stepped back, trying to create some kind of distance between us, but he simply followed me. "I, uhm, that's not why I don't like you, Matthew. I don't like you because you're an insensitive asshole and—"

"Oh, I know why you hate me," he cut me off again, slowly running his tongue to wet his perfectly pink lips. "You hate me because I dated Liz and not you."

His proclamation made my eyes grow even wider and my mouth hung open as I stammered for words. I wanted to disagree, I truly wanted to tell him that he was wrong. But honestly, he wasn't altogether wrong. I couldn't say some of my resentment didn't come from a deep rooted feeling of rejection. Because while most of that resentment came from that place of genuine hurt, my resentment was fueled by frustration and a shameless sense of envy.

But it was just easier to convince myself that I hated him than to admit that I still liked him and that it hurt me that he chose my friend over me.

But of course, I would never admit to that, especially not to him.

Avoiding eye contact, I looked down and shook my head, running my tongue to wet my suddenly dry lips, "of-of course not. Why—why would I care about your dating life? You can fuck whoever you want, I don't care." I wish I sounded more confident when I said that. But my stuttering words and my unsteady legs gave him exactly what he wanted.

And the bastard actually chuckled. He fucking chuckled.

"But you do, you do care. You care because you haven't stopped thinking about us and me since our first year." He grinned, digging his teeth into his perfect lips as he brought a hand to cup my face, lifting it so I had no other choice but to look at him.

And I was fucking gone.

It was like, all of that anger, frustration and hatred just vanished and instead turned into longing want. Want for him to just take me and do whatever he pleases with me. I was practically nothing in his hands, and I was nothing waiting for him to make me something. Waiting for him to make me his.

And that absolutely delighted the bastard. He found amusement in having the power I never allowed him to have. But right now, I just couldn't fight it.

I always knew that if I ever found myself alone and in this situation with Matthew Gubler, I would lose, no matter how much I tried to convince myself otherwise.

And he knew that too.

"That's it, isn't? You want me to fuck you like I fucked your friend." He smirked, almost like he was proud to say it. And he stared, his usually soft amber eyes now brown and darkened with want.

Who the fuck was this guy and where did Matthew go? Matthew Gubler was the most awkward and disgraceful guy when it came to women. The poor guy couldn't even flirt his way out of a wet paper bag. And yet, somehow, here he was, with this new found confidence and the ability to turn me into a shaking and stuttering mess. Who fucking knew.

Once again, I stammered for words, I truly wanted to tell him otherwise. I wanted to scream in his face and push him away, but I couldn't. Not that I wanted to.

He took my lack of response as the answer he was looking for and brought his other hand to my waist, backing me up against the nearest wall, caging me between the hard surface behind me and his body, which right now, seemed so much bigger than mine.

My breathing instantly skyrocketed as I felt the same hand that was on my waist sneak its way past the ends of my dress and up my bare thighs, ones that shook like an earthquake as the pads of his fingers slowly rubbed the tense skin. Like he was testing the waters. Testing how well my body reacted to his touch.

And it wasn't subtle. At all.

"W-what—what are you doing?" I almost squealed, my voice practically betraying me.

"Oh? Well, I'm just giving you what you wanted. I'm giving you what you've been wanting for years." He stated so casually, like he had no idea what he was doing to me. And just as casually, he slowly ran a finger over the thin cotton fabric of my underwear, touching me, but definitely not in the way I needed to be touched.

I wished my body didn't betray me like it did though. I couldn't even hold back the breathy moan that escaped my lips when his fingers made contact with the thin material. But Matthew certainly loved the response I gave him.

"Because this is what you've been wanting, isn't it? You've been thinking about how my fingers would feel buried inside your little cunt. Or how good you would feel around my cock." He taunted, it was almost cynical just how easily those filthy words rolled off his usually reserved tongue. "I'm not gonna lie, I've thought about it too, you have no idea how many times I've thought about having your filthy mouth wrapped around me. Or how pretty you would look begging me for more." 

I opened my mouth to speak but my words instantly got caught in my throat when the sneaky bastard pulled the fabric to the side and dipped his fingers into the soaking mess that was my core.

And if there were any rational thoughts still hanging in my head, all of those just went straight out the window when another moan erupted from my throat and my head fell back into the wall behind me.

"See just how much easier things are when you just shut the fuck up and stop fighting so much?" He almost whispered, his lips ghosting over the skin on my neck as a lithe finger gathered my wetness and spread it over my clit.

Despite being a complete whimpering mess at that point, I managed to spit out a surprisingly harsh, "fuck you." 

It was a pretty convincing retort. One that didn't exactly have the effect I hoped for though.

I could feel him smirk into my neck as his lips left wet and sloppy kisses into the skin before he pulled back, just so he could see the look of utter want and frustration on my face.

"Hm, sorry sweetheart, I can't do that. I'm too busy trying to fuck you instead."

I swear to god, he was the biggest asshole I have ever met in my entire fucking life. But he was an asshole who immediately slipped two of his sinfully long fingers into my dripping core. I instantly choked on my own breath as he began working his fingers around the muscles, stroking the digits inside me at an agonizingly slow pace.

"Because that's what you want don't you sweetheart? You want to me to fuck you into that mattress until you can't keep your eyes open?" He continued, his filthy words making me pant like I ran for fucking miles. "I do too, trust me I do. And I will, I promise. But I want to make up for all of the lost time. Don't you?"

I wasn't even paying attention to whatever filthy proclamations were coming out of Matthew's mouth, with my eyes nearly closed, my mouth slightly open and my mind only focusing on his fingers working diligently inside me, how could I?

But Matthew was expecting an answer this time. Because I could feel his darkened eyes glare into my face and his fingers immediately stilled inside me. Earning a loud whine from me.

"I asked you a question, answer me."

It took me a minute to remember his question before I quickly nodded, "yes! Yes! Is that what you wanted to hear?" I nearly screamed at his face, my hands coming to clutch his shirt, needing something to relieve some tension.

"I want to hear you say it. Say it, tell me you want me." He demanded, his eyes locking with mine as he waited for what he wanted to hear.

He wanted me to beg, he wanted me to give up that control I never allowed him to have. And was I going to?

Absolutely.

I needed to.

"I want you, Matthew, I want you to take me and fuck me into that mattress until I can't walk straight. Please."

I guess that was the answer Matthew had been looking for because his fingers immediately began to work diligently inside me again, stroking the digits until he had me whimpering and begging for release.

It wasn't long before my head started to spin and stars began to blur my vision. Words were no longer an option at that point, nothing would come out, not even Matthew's name. All I could manage to let out were pathetic, strangled moans. But he could tell I was close, or I figured that much because his fingers only worked faster around my tightening walls, determined to finish me.

"C'mon sweetheart, come for me." he encouraged through gritted teeth as his fingers were anything but still inside me and his palm applied a crushing pressure into my front. And even when my eyes were half closed and my mind had turned into dust, I could see the look of utter determination on his face, his eyebrows were furrowed as his teeth dug into his perfectly plump lips. It was like his only focus was on driving me over the edge. And he succeeded.

The second his fingers curled, I was fucking gone. My orgasm hit me like a tidal wave. My eyes rolled into the back of my head as I cried out his name like a praise, my body nearly spasming against the wall. But his fingers didn't stop until my whole body shook to the point where my legs no longer supported my weight and I practically slid into the wall as I tried to catch my breath.

It was almost dizzying just how quickly Matthew withdrew his fingers from me and hoisted me up on his slim torso. He wasted absolutely no time in striding over to my bed across the room. My whole body collided with my bed so quickly and forcefully it knocked the air out of my chest.

Matthew was practically ripping away his clothes before I could even sit up or catch my breath. Like he had this urgency to do what I've been avoiding for the past two years. Like he needed to do it, right now, like something would happen before he got the chance to.

"Matthew—"

"Shut up, I've heard enough shit from you for the past two years, and I'm fucking tired of it." He almost growled, his usually soft voice coming out so low and dark it actually stroked fear in my heart. It was scary just how quickly his demeanor changed.

Matthew didn't really waste much time in discarding his clothes, he was down to only his boxers and was on top of me before I could even blink. He brought a hand to my chest and he pushed me down until my back was flat on the bed, but his hand stayed there, pinning me there as he hovered over me, trapping my significantly smaller body under his own.

He wasted no time in grabbing a hold of my dress and pulling it over my head. And I could've sworn I saw pure awe and infatuation flash through his eyes as they shamelessly eyed over my newly exposed skin. Come to think of it though, this was the first time I was this naked in front of him, and even then, I wasn't fully naked. Not yet anyway.

After a good minute, his eyes flickered back up to meet with mine, his previous look of awe quickly replaced by this feral look of want and pure desire. And I couldn't say it didn't excite me to see it.

He brought a hand to my face, running his smooth fingers over my face with a surprising amount of delicacy before he deep rooted them into my hair and slightly tilted my head back before he brought his face into mine, our lips crashing into a deep fervent kiss. I didn't realize we have never actually kissed. No wonder there was so much desperation and hunger within that kiss. We've been wanting this ever since we met, and ironically, I wanted it more.

His mouth was harsh and fervent against mine, his tongue wasting no time before it quickly slipped between my lips without much of a warning. His tongue explored every inch of my mouth and took as much control as he wanted to as he brought one of his hands to discard my brassiere, he struggled a bit at first but he managed to unhook it and discarded the flimsy material along with the rest of forgotten clothes. He pulled back to capture the image of my newly exposed skin. And he wasn't subtle, at all.

I almost felt intimidated under his deep and penetrating gaze as he shamelessly ogled my exposed body. I was completely exposed to him, completely vulnerable and right now, he could do whatever the fuck he wanted with me. And that scared me, it scared me just how quickly he took control over me after years of fighting against it.

With a hard swallow and a bob of his Adam's apple, Matthew slowly licked his lips, scraping his teeth against his slightly swollen bottom lip in a way that almost made me roll my eyes back into my head. But I didn't, instead I just locked eyes with him as he brought his face down and wrapped his lips around one of my breasts and his tongue swirled around the sensitive bud almost expertly, using one of his hands to toy with the other.

"O-oh fuck." I couldn't help but helplessly moan into the air as my hands found their way into his mop of brown curls. This reaction certainly delighted the bastard above me because I could feel his eyes burning into my face and his lips curving into a smirk around me before he slowly pulled back, latching on to my nipple as he pulled off it.

"You have a very filthy mouth, jeez." He tisked, slightly shaking his head disaprovingly but still had that fucking smirk of his.

Clearly, I wasn't amused, in the slightest, so his stupid comment earned him a nice and concise, "fuck you." 

But then again, it didn't have the effect I hoped for.

"Mhm, yeah, you're about to." He retorted one last time before bringing his face back up to mine, capturing me in a heated and messy kiss that only worked as distraction from the journey Matthew's hands took down south. I was only brought back to reality when I felt my underwear being ripped away and the cool air hitting me. And he was quick to pull down his own boxers and allowed his length to spring free. And I couldn't even play off the fact that I had to stare, my mouth slightly hanging open at the sight of him.

"You're so cute when you stare." He taunted, his words being fairly tame in contrast to his very dark and not innocent tone. The sound of his voice made me flicker my eyes to meet his face. Big mistake, because the borderline devious smirk on his face didn't help, at all. And it certainly didn't help when he positioned himself between my legs, rubbing himself on my already dripping heat.

"You do have condoms here, right?" He asked, but I wasn't paying attention, with him rubbing himself on my slick, I couldn't really pay much attention to anything. "I could just fuck you bareback, I'm clean, so I don't care. But it's up to you." He spoke again, slightly teasing my entrance with the tip of his length, hoping to actually get my attention, and I actually listened this time.

Biting my lip, I mentally cursed at my lack of sexual activity because it just so happened that I had no condoms. Matthew gave me an expectant look, not to pressure me, but just waiting impatiently. I knew if I told him to stop he would without a second thought, but he would just leave. I wasn't going to make that mistake twice.

"I'm clean too, just," I chewed on my bottom lip, already shuddering with anticipation as I hooked my legs around his slim torso, pulling him closer, "just take me, please just fucking take me already."

I didn't have to say it twice.

Without a second thought, he propped himself up on his arms and pressed his face against mine as he slammed into me in one swift motion. A strangled moan erupted from my throat as he buried himself to the hilt, stretching me open at once. And fuck, the feeling of him inside me was intoxicating, addicting even, I don't think I've ever felt like this before.

This was so fucking wrong. So wrong, so wrong to be fucking the guy my friend dated, so wrong to be fucking the guy I swore to everyone I hated. It was just wrong. So why the hell did it feel so right? It was so perfectly right the way our bodies felt together, like they simply belonged there, buried deeply within one another. I never wanted to stop feeling like this.

It was almost dizzying just how good he felt. And with the quick and fervent pace he set for himself right from the start, I knew I probably wouldn't last long. With my eyes rolled into my head, my open mouth and my body sprawled out on the bed as I tried to find something to hold on to, he probably had one hell of a view. And he enjoyed it too, because his thrusts only became harsher.

"Fuck, sweetheart, you're so fucking beautiful," he cursed through gritted teeth, his hands holding my hips down with a vice like grip, making sure I couldn't move. And it wasn't for lack of trying. My body shook and shuddered like a fucking earthquake around him but he simply held me down as he continued.

"You feel so good too. I can't believe you made me wait two fucking years for this. Fuck." He nearly shouted, slamming into me with an insane amount of force and clenched his eyes shut, almost as if the thought made him angry, "two fucking years to take what was mine."

His. He called me his.

Fuck, I wish those filthy words didn't have such a strong effect on me, but boy did they make a number on me. I couldn't even hold back the guttural cry that erupted from my chest as I nodded feverishly, not really realizing what I was nodding to. 

"Yes! Fuck yes, Matthew, I'm yours!" I almost screamed, saying whatever incoherent thoughts flashed through my mind, letting the whole floor know just how much fun I was having and with whom. And with my mind and thoughts being too clouded by the feeling of him, I didn't even think about what those words entailed.

But it didn't matter because they served their purpose regardless. I wasn't expecting just how much the words actually affected him, because his hips began to falter, his thrusts becoming longer but impossibly deeper. And I could see how concentrated he was, with sweat forming on his forehead, his teeth digging into his bottom lip and his breath was hard and short, like this was a task he was determined to finish. He was determined to ruin me.

Letting out a guttural and nearly animalistic groan, Matthew grabbed a hold of my hips and raised them so that each thrust would make him bottom out inside of me, knowing just how close we both were to our release. "Yeah, that's right, sweetheart, let the whole floor know who's making you feel this good," he growled as he gave one last final but brutal thrust, digging his fingers into my hips so tight I just knew I would have bruises tomorrow as he held me down on him, "let the whole floor know you're mine."

And just like that, my orgasm crashed into me, Matthew's harsh words of ownership sending me into a euphoric state of pleasure, my lips chanting his name like a mantra and my walls tightening around him as he came deeply into me, my own name rolling off his tongue in a quiet praise. And the utter and absolute look of ecstasy on his face made up for the bruises I would have to hide for the next few days and for the two years we've made each other's life a living hell. Because right now, seeing that look of being completely fucked, I just wanted nothing more than to just stay like this.

The second we were no longer blinded by our highs, he fell forward, nearly crushing me under his weight as he struggled to get himself up. Yeah he looked fucked alright. Despite knowing damn well he could've easily rolled off me, he didn't, he simply rested his head on my chest and closed his eyes like he was just going to sleep there. A small smile made its way to my lips at the sight of his tousled brown curls on my chest, ignoring all logic, I ran my fingers through the messy locks, and they were in fact as soft as they always looked. 

Realizing just how bad this was for me, and just how vulnerable I actually looked, I smacked his forehead, successfully earning a glare from him once he lifted his head, looking dead at me with his now soft amber eyes.

"You're crushing me, you ass, get off." I breathed out and rolled my eyes, being too exhausted to try and get him off myself. And knowing just how easily he corrupted me, I didn't need another thing to make this harder.

"Okay, okay, jeez." Matthew rolled his eyes, letting his head back into my chest exhaustively and groaned tiredly into my chest before he gathered just enough strength to roll off me and collapsed beside me, his reddened and sweaty chest still rising and falling unevenly as he was still trying to steady his breathing. And I was trying, too. And we just stared, we stared at each other, saying nothing. There was nothing to be said. It was better that way.

After a long long while of silently staring at each other, he brought a hand to my face and rested it there, his thumb mindlessly rubbing over the warm skin of my cheek and he smiled, he simply smiled. And it felt good, it felt comforting, sweet even, it was a funny contrast after what he just did to me.

"So.. About our project.."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tag list:

Matthew Gray Gubler

All- @aberrant-annie @marauder-exe @vquezada84 @boiled-onionrings @writeronkeyboard @l0ve-0f-my-life @mariaramz @soederberg

OUaT in NYU-

So I'm starting a tag list for this fic because it will be a mini series so let me know if you'd like to be added to the once upon in NYU tag list

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 309: Gotta Go My Own Way

Previously on BnHA: Muscular was all “well if it isn’t the protagonist on his solo journey of self-discovery, for some reason I’m unironically glad I get to fight you!” Deku was all “hey Muscular before I finish kicking your ass would you please take a moment to answer these two survey questions? Question one, do you regret being a total piece of shit? And question two, if you could do anything at all in the world other than being a total piece of shit, would you?” Muscular was all, “pfft, no and no.” Deku was all, “thanks buddy, your feedback helps make me a better hero, here’s a coupon for fifteen percent off your next ass-whooping.” Then he whooped his ass.

Today on BnHA: Deku is all “what up All Might can you believe you’ve been here this entire time?” All Might is all “I sure can since that’s literally my catch phrase, anyway how are your magic movie 1 gauntlets holding up?” Deku is all “they’re holding up fine, how are Hawks, Endeavor, and Best Jeanist doing?” Hawks, Endeavor, and Best Jeanist are all “we, your fellow co-conspirators, are also doing fine, thanks for asking!” Flashback!Deku is all “anyway so I secretly have All Might’s quirk and the most dangerous people in the world are after me, so sorry mom but that’s why I’m dropping out of school.” Inko is all “I CAN’T ACCEPT THAT” while totally accepting it. All Might is all “I GUESS WE’LL JUST HAVE TO GO ALONG WITH IT SINCE I DON’T FEEL LIKE TRYING TO STOP HIM.” Hawks, Jeanist, and Endeavor, as previously mentioned, are all “yeah that sounds like a good plan”, and Gran is all “see ya kid, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.” So basically everyone in the entire world has suddenly teamed up with Deku to defeat AFO, except for the one person whose entire foreshadowed endgame is “teaming up with Deku to defeat AFO.” O Kacchan where art thou.

dear tumblr image limit: okay look. you don’t like me, and I don’t like you. but just as an experiment, I’m gonna try writing this recap with as few images as possible and we’ll see how it goes

(ETA: spoilers for how it went: it didn’t, lol.)

oh my god WHY ARE WE OPENING WITH MORE KETSUBUTSU ACADEMY KIDS.ffs we’d better at least finally get some Ms. Joke content out of this

(ETA: seriously who do I have to bribe.)

so these two KB kids who no one cares about are watching Deku leap away from the scene after dispatching Muscular. but more importantly wtf is this chapter title omg. “I can’t stay being a child” so that’s how it is huh. we’re gonna have feels and we’re going to like them. well then

oh my god he’s hauling Muscular away dhfksklfkh okay this is gonna have to be our first image because I can’t fucking help myself. look at this

just. Deku is so tiny and he’s carting away this massive unconscious lump of a man like it’s nothing why is this so funny to me. it’s like when people buy furniture, and they don’t want to pay extra for delivery and so they’re like, “I can definitely fit this king-sized mattress in the back of my compact sedan if I fold the fucking seat down, idk.” and they refuse to be talked out of it, and the next thing you know you’re watching them drive home with their open trunk door haphazardly tied down with bungee cords, and somehow it fucking works. because it turns out the compact sedan has super strength

anyway for SOME REASON now Horikoshi is all “have fun with that Deku, meanwhile we now return you to your regularly scheduled SHINDOU CONTENT” whyyyyyy

look at this. we’re really using up a whole fucking entire page on everyone arguing over who gets the honor of carrying Shindou

love how the civilians are all, “shit lol is this actually our fault?? quick, how do we play this off all casual like we were the reasonable parties here all along”

turns out all it took to finally get them to listen was making them watch while a kid got his insides ground into a pulp because of their stupidity!! what a heartwarming conclusion to this little standoff

anyways THANK GOD we’re cutting back to Deku now!! well actually we’re cutting back to Muscular who is being dropped off at the police precinct, good bye and good riddance lol

so Deku’s leaving him there and bounding away and okjdlSKFJLKJDSL OH MY GOD

no fucking way. no fucking way this little jaunt is All Might-sanctioned and approved. are you serious?? then who else is in on this?? what the hell is going on

so All Might is just WAITING FOR HIM IN AN ALLEY FFF WHO ARE YOU, JIM GORDON. or would Alfred be a better analogy here?? but like, Alfred if he ditched the suit for a moto jacket and shades

this new ensemble of All Might’s may or may not severely impact my ability to take this forthcoming conversation seriously; please stand by

also, quite the spectacular landing there, Deku. seriously lol what was that

“HOW ARE YOUR LIMBS” “THANKS TO YOU THEY’RE COMPLETELY FINE” I’M SORRY WHAT

LOL WHAT. “THANKS TO THE POWER OF THESE MAGIC GLOVES” OH I SEE THAT EXPLAINS IT

are these the same gauntlets from the first movie, then? well that’s all well and good, except that now there’s going to be more Deku Discourse than fucking ever lol. so if it’s all the same to you guys, I’m gonna once again go ahead and declare this week’s post a discourse-free zone, at least when it comes to the specific discourse of Deku’s merits as a MC, and the impact that him kicking ass and having working arms has on said merits. this has been something of a low mental energy week for me, so I’d rather reserve the energy I do have for more fun topics, such as All Might’s bitchin’ leather jacket

anyway so All Might’s saying that the gauntlets will help reinforce Deku’s arms, but they can’t withstand OFA at 100%. so basically it’s a support item designed to maintain the status quo lol. we’re basically in the same situation we were before, arm-capability-wise

homg All Might’s getting a call. time to see who else is in on Operation: Deku Alone?? or not so alone for that matter

omg

HI HAWKS, WHERE ARE YOUR WINGS

(ETA: seriously are they really gone for good?? why would he even be back on active duty then?? does he have his own American ex-boyfriend who can hook him up with exclusive support items?? dammit Horikoshi we want answers.)

looks like Jeanist and Endeavor are teaming up as well, just like they said they would. I would gladly follow this trio around all day long tbh

is this the same giant villain from the very first chapter??

looks like it to me, and it would tie in with that callback from the end of chapter 306. we all thought that was Muscular, but maybe it was this guy, and Deku left these three to deal with him while he ran off to take Muscular down

oh my god now Deku is running off again just like that

kids these days

ffffff I have not had nearly enough sleep to follow along with whatever tf Hawks is talking about here sob

like, is he trying to say that All Might is keeping Deku’s whereabouts unknown to anyone except for him?? in order to keep him safe?? but Hawks is pointing out that that’s a bad strategy and probably won’t do shit against AFO and it’s better if he lets Deku work with the rest of them?

(ETA: so @hanashimas​’ translation makes a lot more sense -- it’s not All Might who’s being overprotective, but Deku. in other words he’s trying not to drag All Might into his battles. and in addition Hawks is saying that their strategy is to take the offensive and go after AFO themselves rather than wait for him to come to them. which I’m not too sure about myself, but that’s another topic for another day.)

btw I can’t help thinking how much better this entire conversation would be if All Might was still wearing his sunglasses. put them back on my dude. it’s not too late. embrace your inner badass

DKLJSLDKFJL FLASHBACK ALERT, FUCKING FINALLY

“turns out, we were just trying to scare you straight. fuck lot of good that did though lol”

also what is this. one true love: the hospital bed. is that a scanlator joke or is Horikoshi actually that funny omg

SKLJDFLJLK

ITSA ME!! omg I love this hospital so much. though it’s sure not helping me in my quest to try and keep this post below ten images. I’m already up to eleven haha r.i.p. to me if tumblr doesn’t get its shit together

whaaaaaat, so he’s saying that Deku’s injuries were external (i.e. Tomura beating the shit out of him) rather than internal this time?? whaaaaat. excuse me but that’s some bullshit lmao. believe me, I was there

okay now he’s going on to explain that Deku’s “internal structure” seems to have been protected from the inside and out, and the corresponding panel seems to be implying that using Blackwhip as a brace paid off. huh

and also that his body is just stronger now?? so I guess he’s better able to withstand the quirk after an additional year of training?? I’M NOT SURE IF I BUY ANY OF THIS LOL but I’m willing to suspend my disbelief

OH MY GOD RED ALERT, INKO IS ASKING ALL MIGHT TO EXPLAIN WTAF DEKU’S QUIRK IS, IS IT FINALLY THAT TIME OMGGGG

SO HE’S EXPLAINING IT TO HER OFF-SCREEN, AND INKO IS JUST LIKE

I GUESS THAT’S FAIR LOL. IT’S TRUE INKO I’M SO SORRY, YOUR SON IS A PROGATONIST R.I.P.

AHHKKJH DEKU ANGST IS IT FINALLY THAT TIME OMGGGGGG

what is this soft pop beat that’s suddenly being pumped in over the speakers. I’VE GOT TO MOVE ON~ AND BE WHO~ I~ AM~~~, I JUST DON’T BELONG HERE, I HOPE YOU UNDERSTAAAAAAAND. also, follow-up question, when is Kacchan finally going to come back so he can jump in with the “WHAT ABOUT US~~~” bridge, huh. come the fuck on, Horikoshi

lmao All Might jesus christ

but given that it’s a stupid-ass decision...

anyway, yes!! finally that sweet, sweet “I don’t want to put anyone else in danger” angst!!

mmm that’s good angst Brent. Kacchan with center panel honors as usual, you love to see it. anyways though who do I have to yell at to get Deku a goddamn HUG around here seriously

so Inko is of course reacting with panic, and sensibly saying that she doesn’t approve of Deku’s “RUN AWAY AND FIGHT THE BAD GUYS ALL ON MY OWN, DON’T WORRY MOM I’LL JUST GET STRONGER, EASY AS PIE, IT’S A FOOLPROOF STRATEGY” plan

son of a bitch this manipulative green asshole is really gonna sit here and smile fondly at his mom and try to convince her that he’s Not A Little Kid Anymore. the hell you’re not mister

y'all are really just gonna sit there and let him talk you into this?? surely it can’t be that easy??

OH MY GOD

THE FEELS oh my god oh my god. BUT ALSO YOU’RE SERIOUSLY JUST GOING TO COLLAPSE INTO HIS ARMS SOBBING AND LET HIM DO WHATEVER THE FUCK HE WANTS LKJLJLFK. WHERE ARE ALL THE STRICT PARENTS AT?? AIZAWA, GANG ORCA, MITSUKI, SOMEONE PLEASE COME AND TELL DEKU TO SIT HIS ASS THE FUCK DOWN. NOW LISTEN HERE YOUNG MAN!!

“EVEN IF I TRY TO STOP YOU YOU’LL STILL LEAVE” WELL SURE, IF BY “TRY TO STOP HIM” YOU MEAN POLITELY TRY TO TALK HIM OUT OF IT FOR THREE SECONDS. HE’S SIXTEEN WTF WHEN DID HE BECOME THE BOSS OF YOU ALL. SOMEONE NEEDS TO COME AND TELL HIM HE’S GROUNDED

anyway sob so that’s the story of how Deku talked his parents into letting him drop out of school, and even convinced All Might to be his own personal Guy In The Chair. holy shit. this kid really went and rolled a nat 20 and the rest of them had no choice but to fold without argument

meanwhile here’s a panel of Best Jeanist trying to braid his phone into his hair just cuz

I’m dying to know which part of his language he considers to be crude here. you literally didn’t even use a contraction my guy

so now flashback!Deku is talking to Gran in the dark, and Gran is all “can you believe I’m not fucking dead yet lol that’s too funny. anyway, you sure I can’t interest you in killing Tomura after all?? no?? okay then here’s my cape.” truly a heartwarming scene

I’m kind of torn here tbh. on the one hand, my adhd ass wasn’t all that interested in sitting down and having an extended scene between these two when there’s so much else that I want to get to. but on the other hand, even I can admit that cramming this entire reunion into a single page seems just a BIT rushed. idk. like maybe someone can let Horikoshi know it’s a marathon and not a race. Deku didn’t even get any dialogue here, some of us want to know his thoughts!! but anyway

AND JUST LIKE THAT?!

how did all four of them let him con them into this. I literally just watched it happen and I still can’t figure out how. “I GUESS THIS SIXTEEN-YEAR-OLD HIGH SCHOOL DROPOUT IS OUR LEADER NOW” ffflfjf. when Aizawa finds out he’s gonna go apeshit. AND DON’T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON BAKUGOU KATSUKI, WHO I HAVE BEEN ASSURED DOES IN FACT STILL EXIST. WHAT ABOUT USSSSS, WHAT ABOUT EVERYTHING WE’VE BEEN THROUGH. WHAT ABOUT TRUST???! YOU KNOW I NEVER WANTED TO HURT YOUUUUU

btw lol don’t get me wrong, I am enjoying this, and I’m honestly glad Deku’s not alone because that would suck for him! but that said, Hawks and Jeanist have lost any credibility they might have once had as far as being The Responsible Ones, and as for All Might and Endeavor, fucking hell lol. everyone just deposited all of their fucks in a bank somewhere for safekeeping and decided to never look back. godspeed you mad lads

[crystalstar8]

Knights of the Night (Epilogue 2)

Epilogue 2

Ch 1, ch 2, ch 3, ch 4, ch 5, ch 6, ch 7, ch 8, ch 9, ch 10, ch 11, ch 12, ch 13, ch 14, ch 15, ch 16, ch 17, ch 18, ch 19, ch 20, ch 21, ch 22, ch 23, epilogue, epilogue 2

https://archiveofourown.org/works/29139240/chapters/71536491

pairing: Jungkook x oc

genre: vampire au, college au, twilight, romance

word count: 1,053

warnings: blood (obviously), kidnapping, child kidnapping, needles, France, human trafficking

notes: vampires, vampire au, college, college au, so many twilight references, blood, needles, kidnapping, children, homelessness, dance, ballet, flashbacks, romance, slow burn, probably no smut, idk yet tho, France, French things, attempted genocide, inaccurate French history, bisexual main character, @strawberriewithchocolate-blog @mozy-j  @daechwitad-2​ @zobadak​ @fallenstar-7​​​

summary: Catalina starts college in a small town all the way across the country. She doesn’t know anyone and isn’t exactly looking for friends. She just wants to focus on dance. But when she meets fellow dance major, Jimin, and adventurous, fellow freshman, Jungkook, Catalina ends up discovering a whole new side to the small college town; one that is dangerous but oh so enticing...

Jungkook was waiting for her outside the building, a rose in his hand. Catalina’s nose scrunched into a smile as she skipped down the stone steps.

France was overwhelming; the architecture everywhere was ancient and beautiful, and the history was fascinating and rich. The people were a bit rude, especially once they realized they were Americans. They were only a bit more forgiving when Namjoon, Taehyung, and Yoongi showed off their fluent French.

The theater Catalina had her audition in was stunning. The outside was all white columns and friezes, the inside was mosaic tiled floors and painted ceilings.

               When she reached the bottom of the stairs, she dropped her dance bag and threw herself into Jungkook’s arms.

               “You got me a rose?” she asked, leaning back just enough to look at the rose in his hand.

               “Of course I got you a rose,” he said. “You think I’d let you step out of an audition without a rose?”  

               Catalina giggled and took the flower from him.

               “How did it go? Did you get in?” he asked.

               “I don’t know yet,” said Catalina. “They’re going to do callbacks in a few days.”

               “Good thing we’re staying for a while,” said Jungkook.

               “But honestly, it doesn’t matter if I get in or not,” said Catalina. “There’s always next year. And There’s always plenty of shows.”

               “Yeah, you have all the time in the world,” said Jungkook. He stared at her for a moment, then whispered, “I want you to turn me.”

               “Oh yeah?” Catalina asked. She had been waiting for this. She knew that he was worried about aging without her, she could see it his eyes sometimes when they went to bed together, knowing she wouldn’t fall asleep. She especially saw it on his birthday. “You’re still young.”

               “I know, but I’m already the same age as you now,” he said.

               “Oh no! You’re the same age as me! You basically have one foot in the grave already!” Catalina giggled.  “You should take your time. You get hotter every year. Let yourself ripen a bit before doing this.”

               He laughed loudly and tugged her closer.

               “That’s true,” he said.

               “Wait until we both graduate,” said Catalina. “We can talk then.”

               “You’re pulling an Edward on me?” he said. “Next thing I know, it’ll be, ‘wait until we’re married’.”

               Catalina giggled and swatted his arm. “You’re being a baby.”

               “I know. I’m kidding,” he said. “I can wait.”

               “Besides, we need time to explore the wonders of blood drinking during sex,” she said. “Did you know there’s aphrodisiacs in the venom when you drink from someone? It’s supposed to make them pliant, but it doesn’t turn them into a vampire.”

               “That sounds hot,” said Jungkook. “Also, I am a fan of being manhandled. I’m not ready for that to end just yet.”

               “I know. We might need a chaperone though,” she said, tapping her chin. “I don’t know if I’d be able to stop once I got started. You smell way too good.”

               “We have plenty of time to work out the specifics,” said Jungkook. “I need time to get hotter each year, so we’ll figure it out.”

               They both laughed as they went to the car waiting for them.

~~~~~~~~~~~

               Taehyung loved the Louvre. It was like a dream come true, wandering the unending corridors, seeing all the classics he’s idolized for hundreds of years.

               “Taehyungie, what’s this one called?” Jimin asked. His hand was covering the informational plaque under a series of paintings depicting a man looking at a celestial globe. Jimin had been doing this for hours, but Taehyung didn’t mind. He loved sharing what he knew about all his favorite pieces.

               “That’s ‘The Astronomer’, by Vermeer,” said Taehyung. Jimin smiled and strolled ahead down the corridor, in search of his next quiz. It was a weekday, so the museum wasn’t very busy. There was a tour group of young students, which Taehyung and Jimin ran into a few times, but otherwise there were only a few stray artists wandering around doing sketches of the statues.

               In the back of his mind, Taehyung knew that the rest of their group was supposed to meet them here at some point, but Taehyung and Jimin were so far into the maze of art that he wouldn’t even know how to direct them once they arrived. He wasn’t worried about it either. He was having too much fun with Jimin to care about the others right now.

               Every moment spent with Jimin was special to him. He still couldn’t believe sometimes how quickly Jimin had reassured and forgiven Taehyung; he was so sure Jimin would hate him for making that decision for him. And while Jimin was struggling getting used to his new life, he made it clear that he was thankful to be alive, that he was excited to spend forever with Taehyung.

               “What about this one?” Jimin asked. Taehyung strolled over to look at what painting Jimin was at.

               “‘St. Michael Vanquishing Satan’,” said Taehyung. “Raphael.”

               Jimin continued down the hall, eyes flitting across each painting. Taehyung was most excited to see David; he heard that the statue was way bigger in person than one would expect.

               Taehyung stopped. The painting he was looking at made his eyes widen and his mouth fall open. The plaque said that the artist was unknown. Jimin must have noticed that Taehyung had stopped moving, because he wandered over, letting out a gasp when he saw the painting.

               They didn’t say anything for a while. The school group wandered past behind them, the children’s voices bouncing off the stone walls.

               “Hey, that guy looks just like you!” a voice shouted from behind them. Jimin turned around to talk with the girl, who was pointing at Taehyung. Taehyung didn’t take his eyes off the picture though. He felt a tear roll down his face.

               “Can I take a picture of you with that painting?” the little girl asked. Taehyung wiped the tear from his cheek and nodded, turning around to face the girl. She lifted her phone and snapped a picture. She gave them a toothy smile before running to catch up with her classmates.

               “Is this Adrianna’s work?” Jimin asked. Taehyung nodded. He turned back around to stare at the painting of himself with his dog.

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A/N:

And that’s a wrap! Thank you to everyone reading this and sticking with me during this story. Reading the comments was my favorite part of this journey. 

This story is officially novel length! I’ve never accomplished that before with a complete work! I’ll be posting this story on Wattpad, and I’m also thinking of changing names and adding scenes to make this a publishable work, so keep your eyes out for updates on that!