#and also gives them a general form that may be a bit divorced from what they look like in their own world

[upsidedowngrass]

do you think liam and stone would be friends if they ever met outside of The Plane again

HMM!!!

(put under a readmore cus i ended up talking a LOT lol :) )

i think they could be friends!!! i think stone liked the contestants. while im pretty sure stone picked liam to give the notes to 1) because he is a backpack. he can hold notes. and 2) he seems the MOST stubborn of all of the contestants, so think compared to the chance for things to end well (or at least, the best they COULD end), liam was the best bet to pick thru all possible courses of action

but even outside of that stone generally seems to like them all, helping bryce when he didnt need to, visibly looking guilty for having to sabotage amelia, etc. i think they showed liam one of the notes bc they WANTED him to understand that theyre trying to help, and i think there was a chance hed understand, but he just happened to Not. with everything we know abt stone (which unfortunately isnt much), he looks like he WANTS to help them because he cares, and i think they wouldve liked to be friends with them, and to have met all of them under better circumstances. (he obv knows about the concept of friends because he knows everything, but i think they dont really get many opportunities to meet New people given. being from a world of Just rocks) point is that i think stone would love to be friends w liam!!

whether or not LIAM would wanna b friends is a diff question tho. liam doesnt seem like the type of guy whod necessarily hold anything against stone, since he gradually seems to respect stone more and more as he follows the notes, but i think there Could be some discomfort there. if stone hadnt written the notes, he never wouldve gone to bryce, he never wouldve died a bunch more times, and he never wouldve gotten stuck in airys world. but then again, if they hadnt written them, if airy had still died, all of the contestants couldve been trapped on the plane literally forever, and julien wouldve been stuck in the waiting room forever

i think liam would still think about stone pretty fondly, and historically he hasnt really been concerned about 'people who could remind him of his time on the plane, but 'well this person reminds me of my time on the plane' given everything with bryce, but during all that he was still very much. not in the mentality of being at home. (after he got home, he seems to REALLY still feel stuck on the plane, esp if what he says to bryce is anything to go off of) it could be very different once hes home, and because? i think stone ended up kinda STILL being with him thru s2, just symbolically. so i think it could be complicated for liam

but all of this aside? i think any discomfort he may feel would maybe be set to the side. liams pretty passive by nature, and i think being able to be friends with stone would actually kinda end up giving him a sense of closure about some things!!! most of his interactions with stone WERE somewhat strained, but i think liam wouldnt rly even think abt that

i dunno!!! but i think theyd make good friends if they had the opportunity to meet again. liam makes conversation pretty easy when he wants to, even though its not smth he especially goes out of his way to do, but i think when he would like to he can be VERY annoying abt it. if he wanted some level of Knowing stone, because i think it could be Nice to have stone be less of this ominous figure whos motives werent super clear but did ultimately help (assuming in this hypothetical he and stone meet again on earth, but i think in airys world stone could be. actually pretty nice for him to meet again? dont know!) and instead this Person who helped him and his friends, he would be a bit stubborn about it, and maybe a bit awkward about it, but i think stone would be okay with it. stone seems very 'reluctantly WILL do things for the greater good but would like to do helpful things that DONT make people upset instead. wants to just get along with people but just ISNT in a situation where they can' and also generally patient (i think they have to be patient given the world theyre from) so i think itd work out!!!!

anyway this post is long and idrk how clear it is BUT its fun to think abt!!!! idk how liam would get the chance to meet stone again but i would LOVE if it did happen

[whereispearlescentmoon]

For those who need a GGG recap on why the three of them seem to be pre-divorced (Warning, this is a Pearl blog. I will try to be as balanced as possible, but I may seem biased towards Pearl):

TLDR; They can’t stop betraying each other but the sticking point is what counted as the first betrayal.

Last Life: Scott and Pearl were teamed up (Scottage Duo/Galaxy Duo), and when Cleo was betrayed by BigB, Scott brought her in to their team, forming GGG. At the very end of the series, it was down to Scott and Pearl vs Ren and Martyn. When Scott killed Ren he said he had to because Ren killed Pearl. This is the healthiest they will ever be.

Double Life: The fault here is dependent on what you see as the first betrayal. If you haven’t seen this season, the gimmick is that they had soulmates who they shared a health bar with. If one took damage, the other did, and vice versa.

On day one, Pearl and Martyn decided to go to the nether together, something Martyn does every season he can, to gather supplies. Scott and Cleo ended up figuring out that those two had to be their soulmates because literally everyone else was teamed up and because they were taking damage constantly, which is typical of a nether trip. To Scott and Cleo, this is the first betrayal. Pearl and Martyn ditched them to go to the nether without caring about how their soulmate would also be taking damage.

When they got back, Pearl and Martyn went to look for their soulmates. Martyn set up a little game show at spawn that Scott and Cleo showed up to. When it was discovered that Scott and Pearl were soulmates, Scott announced that actually Cleo was already his soulmate and they didn’t want Pearl or Martyn, Martyn decided to pin the nether trip on Pearl, which was a lie btw, and he left her alone. To Pearl, this is the first betrayal. Pearl also, notably, has gotten a wolf on the first session that Martyn actually named Tilly, who she declares is her soulmate. It is at this point that Pearl starts to lean into the “Scarlet Pearl”/5AM Pearl persona which from her POV is very much a scorned, sad, lonely woman, but from everyone else’s POV is lowkey terrifying.

Cleo and Scott set up a “relationship ranch” to essentially be a couples counselor to other soulmate pairs. At some point they decide a good way to get back at their soulmates would be to axe crit each other, which does more damage than a sword strike. Cleo and Scott are also constantly talking about how much their soulmates suck all season, and are generally, by their own admission, the “mean girls” of the season.

Pearl at around the same time is approached by Scar, who felt cast aside by his soulmate and ally Grian, and Scar gives her the idea to use powdered snow, an item that does low but constant damage, so they can both annoy their soulmates. Pearl, after the axe crit, decides that two can play at the intentional damage game, and sits in the powdered snow with Scar. On multiple instances, both Pearl and Scott will stand in powdered snow while staring at each other, basically playing chicken with their health bars. Pearl also stands in powdered snow with Cleo at some point.

However, Pearl is 100% more reckless with their health than Scott. She lives a massive tower with only a ladder to get up and down that she constantly takes little bits of damage on, and she actually intentionally brings herself down to half a heart right in front of Scott by taking fall damage while taunting him. She is also responsible for their first death, having decided to try and steal a diamond chest plate from the Boat Boys (Joel and Etho) despite them being on red and thus allowed to kill.

There is also an incident in which Pearl decides to mess with Scott and Cleo by building a small hut on the bridge outside their home. Cleo responds by burning it, including doing damage to Tilly, who again Pearl has declared her soulmate. This seems to make Pearl really angry and upset and what started as playful teasing on both sides becomes actively malicious. It is worth noting that, rewatching DL, Pearl has no alliances that last more than maybe half a session. I haven’t watched Third Life, but as far as I can tell Pearl was the first person to ever have 0 allies all season, unless you count her occasional brushes with Scar where they were friendly enough or the time Ren and Martyn groveled to her out of desperation (After Ren had called her a demon with evil in her heart, but also gave her her second Tilly when the first one died. It’s complicated but not the point of this.)

At the end of the season, the last yellows were, ironically, the Divorce Quartet. Scott actually brings Pearl another wolf so she can breed up an entire dog army. The four of them hang out for part of the session, an event filled with snide comments on all sides, until Pearl goes off on her own again. Eventually Scott gets killed by Joel, bringing them down to red.

Pearl, by my own estimate, wins when she kills Impulse and BDubs and Martyn and Cleo on her own. This also starts the tradition of Pearl killing Cleo when she feels Cleo has betrayed her, as she only starts attacking after Martyn, who Cleo is now firmly allied with, shoots a firework at some of her dogs. The reason I say she won there is because the only person left is Scott. If they were any other soulmate pair, this may have been a double win, but unlike everyone else, these two weren’t allies. Scott blows himself up, killing himself and Pearl, but since he’s the one who actually died, Pearl is declared the victor.

Limited Life: This season actually starts relatively well for Cleo and Pearl, and Cleo and Scott. Cleo and Scott immediately make a side alliance, which is their default, and so do Cleo and Pearl. Scott and Cleo all season maintain their side alliance and generally are pretty friendly and willing to help each other out. Pearl teams up with BigB, who Cleo warns her about due to the fact that BigB has betrayed them before. Pearl both does not head this warning and is never betrayed by BigB.

Pearl and Scott get off to a rocky start immediately when she goes over to the island he has set up with Martyn. She immediately brings up last season, and it’s clear there’s still animosity between them, though it’s more playful this time.

Pearl and Cleo, by virtue of being neighbors, interact a lot more. The Clockers (Cleo, Scar, and Bdubs) set up by spawn on day one, mostly to watch the Bad Boys mansion burn after Cleo sets it on fire, and the Nosey Neighbors (Pearl and BigB) set up next to them so they can have a central point to watch everyone from (always watching).

Pearl and Cleo realize that they are going to go yellow at the same time, as they have the same amount of time left (the gimmick of limited life is that the players had 24 hours to live and could gain time by killing and lose time by dying). They decide to stand still and stare at each other while they turn yellow.

At some point, and I’m genuinely forgetting why, Scar decides to burn down some of the decorations on the Nosey Neighbor’s tower. I think it may have been that they promised the Clockers some TNT mine carts that they didn’t deliver on? Either way, Pearl takes this personally. Her and BigB both build a wall and dig a trench between them and the Clockers, showing that their tentative alliance is over.

Pearl, once yellow, decides to switch to her 5AM Pearl skin to mess with people and fails. Scott actually says at some point “Oh she thinks she can just put on a red skin and act crazy,” to mock her attempts at being scary. She does, however, successfully steal him and Martyn’s enchanting table, making them enemies.

The only person who does seem legit put off by her changing her skin is Cleo, who gets startled upon seeing her and says “Oh are we Scarlet Pearling this session?”

When Scott is on yellow and Cleo is on red, Scott lets Cleo kill him to gain more time, again solidifying their alliance. Scott ends up coming over at Pearl’s request in the final session and she tries to trap him to get BigB time. It doesn’t work. Scott ends up expressing that Pearl is a great ally to have, which BigB agrees with.

Cleo is the last of her alliance alive and is defending herself against Grian when Pearl comes in and decides to take the kill, the second time in a row that she has been Cleo’s final killer. Scott ends up killing BigB, Pearl’s ally, which puts him firmly on Pearl’s kill list as well.

Eventually the last people left are Scott and Martyn, who are allies, and Pearl and Impulse. Scott ends up chasing Pearl down and killing her, making this the second time he has been Pearl’s final killer.

Secret Life: On day one, Pearl and Scott end up coming across each other in the woods. Scott makes a joke about how it’s always the two of them. Pearl and Cleo also come across each other and end up splitting some bones that Cleo has so they can both tame a wolf. They make a side alliance called the “Puppo Alliance”, which is deeply millennial and hurt me to type. Cleo and Scott, as always, set up a side alliance.

Scott ends up teaming with Gem and Impulse, Cleo with Etho and eventually Grian, and Pearl with Mumbo, Bdubs, and Joel. The Joel thing is somewhat important because at this point it is evident that Joel’s #1 priority in any Life series is that Scott end up dead, though I don’t think Pearl took that into consideration when allying with him.

The gimmick of Secret Life was that they all had a secret task to do each session, which would give them hearts, a necessity as health did not regen so if you lost health you just lost it. One of Scott’s secret tasks was to say “I love you” to three people and have them say it back. When Scott tries this on Pearl, her only reaction is “Quite different from a certain series in the past, eh?” And she does not say “I love you” back, which Scott points out in the next session.

Pearl ends up apologizing the next session and says “I love you” to him. She is also forced into close proximity with him and helps his team build a zombie farmer, as her task is to be Impulse’s butler that session, who again is Scott’s ally.

At some point, Cleo’s dogs end up dying. To Cleo, this means the Puppo Alliance is over, though they neglect to inform Pearl of this. When Pearl gets hurt and offended at Cleo proceeding to kill some of her wolves, thinking they are still allies, Cleo laughs at her, implying that it’s obvious they can’t still be the Puppo Alliance if Cleo has no wolf. Pearl ends up taking Cleo’s yellow life, citing the wolf killing as her reason. Pearl also kills both of Cleo’s allies, Grian and Etho, this session, making her a firm enemy.

Generally speaking, Scott steers his alliance away from hurting Cleo and her alliance, and she does the same. However, after Cleo and Etho are both killed by Scar, Gem is free to kill Grian, the only remaining Roomie.

In the finale, Scott kills Pearl’s last remaining allies again, BDubs and Joel. She ends up teaming up with Scar, the second/third person to have no allies all season (Lizzie also had no allies this same season, unless you count Joel, her literal husband). The last four people are Pearl and Scar, and Scott and Gem. For the third time Pearl and Scott are in a final four of two alliance pairs, but this time on opposite sides. I’ve seen people talk about this as the two winners and their champions, and it really does feel that way.

Real Life: This was a one session April Fool’s special so you would think there isn’t much to say, but it’s shockingly chock full of GGG. One thing to note is that the players are far less “in character” due to this being an April Fool’s joke. The “gimmick” here was literally just that they were playing in Minecraft VR, which none of them knew how to play.

The first notable thing is that Cleo sets up a double chest and jokes that it will be her coffin for when Pearl inevitably kills her again. Pearl ends up giving her a flower which makes Cleo very happy.

While mining, Scott, Cleo, and Pearl meet up and, to quote,

“Is this the group? Oh, G-d we’ve done it again,”- Cleo

“Wait what?”-Pearl

“It’s Gatekeep, Girlboss, and Gaslight!”-Scott

“Oh Jeez. Alright, bring it in!”- Pearl

They group hug, they do the Macarena, Scott mines some blocks out from under Pearl because falling in VR is a weird experience, it’s all good.

Pearl, somehow, ends up with a dog again that she names Milly as a reference to Tilly. Milly ends up dying because dogs in Minecraft VR are even more janky than regular Minecraft. She, jokingly, lays down on the ground to cry. Since this is VR she genuinely lays down in real life to do this. Gem tries to reassure her by saying that at least she got to name it this time and Cleo says it’s worse when she names it, likely also referring to Pearl going off the deep end when Tilly died.

Before Pearl can fully get up, Cleo kills her. Scott takes this as his cue to start killing and he kills Martyn while Cleo kills Gem, leaving them as the final two. Scott, ironically, dies to an actual zombie, meaning that Cleo wins Real Life.

[the-nosy-neighbor]

The Eye of Wally, Part 2

This is kind of a side exploration of the idea of decapitation/disassembly of a body represented both in the relevant mythology as well as the project.

Here we have stories about gods being reduced to multiple pieces or entities resurrected from a dismembered state, with echoes in the traditions of other mythologies.  We’ve talked specifically about the dismemberment of characters, in the Greek as well as Christian traditions.  Granted, a lot of traditions are adopted and adapted, but I had a comment at some point talking about how Barnaby’s head being removed had echoes of the Christian story of John the Baptist.

Examples of mythological dismemberment:

Egyptian—Osiris is destroyed by being cut into 14 pieces to win a throne, his genitals are lost and recreated, a goddess uses this as an impetus to conceive and give birth.  Interestingly, he is sometimes resurrected and sometimes not. 

Greek—Venus is born from the dismembered corpse of Uranus, which was thrown into the sea (specifically the bloody foam, usually).  I did see a suggestion about this being genitals specifically, but she’s a love goddess, which is a connection probably to both the generative properties of reproduction and its connection with love, as well as a sense of emasculation in being beholden to a woman.

Christian—John the Baptist is beheaded and his head served to a king.  There is a lot of information about where the head might be throughout history.  Of course, humans during the early years to middle ages (and probably beyond) are somewhat obsessed with keeping parts of the physical bodies of saints and villains.  Hitler’s genitals are said to exist out there somewhere, so maybe we aren’t over that.  In this story, the dismemberment is because John TB criticizes Herod for divorcing his wife.  He has the head served to him on a platter and his head and other bits become scattered through the world as people believe in the magical properties of his body.  (side note: after further research, this action is blamed squarely on the women in the situation)

Dismemberment in mythology is often used in creation myths to describe what the world is made of and how it came to be.  Other concepts often go along with it, the dichotomy between male and female, light and dark, and spring.  But a major element is this destruction and creation.  It goes violence>dismemberment>generative act>the body as magical/desired items.

There is also a modern conversation about an equivalent to a dismemberment—the objectification of othered bodies.  In feminist theory, there are discussions of the tendency of female bodies to be presented in pieces rather than the whole (which is part of a concept named the “male gaze”):  “the act of depicting women and the world in the visual arts and in literature from a masculine, heterosexual perspective.”  Often, the idea of “objectification” is discussed, which hasn’t necessarily lost its meaning, but has lost its teeth.  The original concept is that there is a tendency in media to represent women as parts rather than a whole, which is not only sexualizing but somewhat threatening as it chops women into pieces: 

Before anyone gets too upset about this idea, it is not generally considered a conscious move.  In some advertising and forms of photography, this may be the case.  In these ads, the top two are built to appeal to men, and the last one is seemingly aimed toward women, but there is always the argument that this is the female being courted into supporting their own objectification.  Not to go too far into it, the concept analyzes efforts to remove the personhood of a woman by reducing her to her parts (and those parts are considered exist to please others).

The feminist concept of objectification might be in use here, but more in a general sense, in that when you dismantle a body, then it becomes objects in your mind.  In this universe, in particular, we are all getting attached to blorbos and considering them “alive” but then we are faced with these images of very obvious puppet parts, which forces us to acknowledge that they are not alive.  That’s where the horror comes from, right? 

And considering the mythology, the taking apart of bodies is either a creative or a destructive state—sometimes both. 

[smartzelda]

Would a female Mellon hate men?

Ah, good question (I'm going to assume you're talking about Mello from Death Note, so apologies if this isn't the case)

So if I had to give a simple answer I would say no or...not necessarily

Butttt this is the house of essay, so if you wish to hear my ramblings about why I say no or not necessarily, it'll be under the cut.

Okay, so to preface, as dumb as this may sound, I actually think questions like this (and ones along the line of "how would these death note characters be or turn out if they were the opposite gender") are interesting. This is because (given how death note fairly accurately depicts what society is like at the time of writing, since it takes place in the real world) answering such questions require breaking down the kind of environment the characters grew up in/what opinions they'd be more privy too, who they already are in canon, how a change in gender could change who they become/cause a change in environment, and of course how they are/would be affected by gender roles/society in Japan at the time

Now, I'm no scholar. I don't pretend to be incredibly knowledgeable about how misogyny, queerphobia, etc affected people of other countries at the time (since I myself am American), and I do think to come to a more accurate conclusion it would take deeper knowledge on that I do not possess. So, I will simply try my best based on my minimal knowledge and knowledge of canon, because when has being a little in the dark stopped anyone from giving an opinion 😂

Okay, so. To break down why I think what I do, I first have to begin with who Mello is as a character already. The Whammy kids, by virtue of not being raised in Japan and specifically the environment they were raised in (to me) are a bit, shall I say, divorced from social standards and generally accepted codes of ethics.

This is to say that I believe L, Near, and Mello all know what the societal standards and society's general moral views *are*, they just don't necessarily subscribe to them because they were not raised to believe that these things are absolute and you should always 100% believe what your guardians tell you. More than likely they're encouraged to question the world around them and come to their own conclusions.

To me this is what might differ Mello from Light, for example, because (I will try not to get too deep into the Light character study forming in my brain) Light Yagami was born and raised within society, and his morals/beliefs were heavily affected by his personal bubble of existence and his cop father. So even if Light can twist things to tell himself that he is the moral and ethical one here and would no longer be considered a "good person" by his father's standard's when he commits attrocities, he generally is allowed to be divorced a bit from said atrocities by using the death note and manipulation to enact his plans and is partly driven by his need to be seen as a good person.

By contrast, Mello doesn't need any moral reasons to commit atrocities, and he doesn't need to keep distance for his own sanity. He also knows how societal standards work and (unlike Light, who does so out of necessity) does not really subscribe to them. It's enough to him to commit atrocities for the sake of his childhood rivalry and one-upping Kira after he bested L, and unlike Light he would absolutely kill someone with his own hands if needed and not have to feel bad about it. He knows by society's ideas (and maybe in the opinion of his previous caretakers) he's doing things that could be considered "bad" but he's pretty indifferent to that. His image, his adherance to societal standards, they're all tools he doesn't have to feel bad about using (unlike Light, who has to believe he's either a good or normal person when doing these things, or that he's above everyone else in a high fashion).

Now, I don't want to get too lost in any given essay explanation over why I think Whammy's house is any given way and why I disagree with any given person over how different gen's were treated and who Quillish Whammy is as a person. So I'm going to stick with saying that I think at the time Death Note takes place, Whammy's house would be considered more progressive. There's more proof by gen 4 supporting the idea that the children were given equal opportunity and materials should they want to work to succeed, especially as L's successors, and that they wouldn't be given less opportunity to develop their talents just because of their gender, sexuality, race, or class birth, than the opposite. However, we also have Mello, who really begins to explore his own style when he leaves, and Near, who starts growing out his hair and also starts existing how he wants to more than before when he's more removed from Whammy's house than before post the Kira case. So I personally believe that while Whammy's house at the time of canon does not discriminate by gender, race, class, or sexuality, they do keep a bit more rigidity in terms of gender presentation (as in, they won't force you to be 100% performing masculinity or feminity, but still may generally believe in the binary. For example, you can also be trans, but if you are a boy/trans boy, you should not wear dresses. Ya feel? Like not 100% accepting but still better than society at the time)

This is all to say that people from Whammy's house, such as Mello, Near, and L, I believe also don't inherently discriminate this way. They're not beholden to societal standards, so they, more than likely given their characters, are actually more likely to weigh people based upon intelligence. So if they hate someone, it's because of what they did, or if they think lowly of someone, it's because they don't fit their standards, not inherently because of their gender, race, etc

Keeping all this in mind, I think that if Mello was a woman she would turn out largely the same way. She still would most likely not inherently discriminate by gender, race, sexuality, etc. However, with her position, I can see her

1. Being at least a little more sympathetic than before to other women

2. Being personally more affected by society's treatment of women than before

So I think if any men specifically tried to do anything to her (especially if she can't do anything about it) she could hate them specifically, and she might have a harder time rising to the same position Mello did in canon. But, Mello is also pretty stubborn and resilient and manipulative. Even if she'd be personally aware of how society treats women, it wouldn’t stop her from doing everything in her power and using any tool at her disposal to enact her plans. And, because we don't know 99% of the details about how canon Mello rose to his position, depending on what he did, she very well could have used similar tactics

So, no, I don't personally think you'd see female Mello walking around spouting off "all men suck" any more than canon Mello might.

[oshaskell]

🎶 🎀 and ✅ for the writing ask game!

RAIII!! thank you for the question <3

✅ - list one or two favorite lines you've written and explain why they're your favorite

Ok you get some favorite bits from Ring fic, which I will hopefully finish soon!

This bit, post killing the clown pt. 2, Richie's thinking of how they all forgot each other the first time:

It won't happen again—something in Richie's gut burns certain of this, without knowing why or how. It simply won't. The curse is over: they get to keep each other this time.

I love this idea of people's presence in your life being something you keep, as if it were a physical memento. And the certainty, unfounded as it may be, that you've somehow beat a verifiable curse. I'm not evil, so obviously they don't forget, but in Richie's place? Literally no way for him to know what will happen. Imagine.

Bev and Eddie hangouts, a bit after:

Tom Rogan could get fucked, Eddie often said between clenched teeth, a sentiment she echoed with a bitter laugh, and which would often spring when they were both having one of their hangout-nights, which were less fashion-consultation-meetings and more of a Club for Loser Divorcées, or those in the process of becoming a Loser Divorcée. Even Big Bill had started showing an interest.

I just love the recurring idea in post itch2 fanon fic that Bev, Eddie, and Bill basically form their own little divorce club (with wine nights and everything!). I also like letting Eddie be a little resentful and hang out with his pals.

And a little moment post-them getting together:

He stops. Shakes his head.  “I’ve just been loving you for a really long time."

Eddie being honest with his feelings really really gets to me. I love writing him letting himself be open after a lifetime of being closed off in self-protection. He feels safe enough now that he can say this.

A thousand thank yous for asking this one, it actually made me start adding to this WIP again!!

🎀 - answered here <3

🎶 - do you write with music? does the music you're listening to influence your writing?

I don't write with music usually...! it's too distracting. I write in silence or with white noise (static or rain/café sounds). I can do instrumental music sometimes if it fits the vibe of the piece...

The music I'm listening to in general can sometimes give me story ideas (ultra rare ocurrence) but it mostly just inspires me to plan animatics!!! which I seldom actually work on, but they're fun to storyboard. sigh...

[fic writing game!]

[alyjojo]

The Current Karmic ☣️ Connection In Your Life - June 2023 - Virgo

Who are they: 4 Pentacles rev

Your relationship with them: Knight of Cups rev

What you’re learning from them: The Devil

What they’re learning from you: The Hierophant

Future potential: Death

Overall energy: Justice

Right off the bat, clearly an ex, this is a connection that led you both to where you’re supposed to be. It has a happy outcome, but not together. You both seem to be happy about separating from this connection, and you’ve both moved on to other successful relationships. If you agree on only one thing, it’s that you’re where you’re supposed to be now. You get a heavy bit of the blame for why it didn’t work out, but I doubt that bothers you, they’ve taught you a lot that’s helped you.

This person is someone that’s released you and jumped into something else in the past. Let go of one, jump right into another. You could see them as someone illogical, daydreamy, over-romanticizing everything in their life. That same energy also describes the relationship between you. They love you intensely, almost too much, and you just see this as a form of emotional manipulation to get what they want from you. Or that’s switched, and that’s how they feel about you, because their cards suggest they let down their guard and jumped into that energy in the past, with/for you. One of you is being seen as a liar, a manipulator, someone that’s not genuine. This may have started very quickly and ended just as fast.

What you’re learning from them is a tough pill to swallow, only take what resonates or how it does for you. I’ve seen The Devil in more of these karmic readings than any other topic I’ve done 💯 That’s what karmics do, if there’s a Devil in there, they’re going to bring it to the surface for you to face. This is toxicity in yourself, relating to control, power, greed, materialism, and using money, status, power trips etc., to define someone’s worth or to make them feel “lesser” than you in some way. With 5 Swords, this can be any level of cruel behavior, especially financial abuse, manipulation, using others for their resources or deeming the value of others by their material crap. Jobs. Houses. Whether or not they have a Tesla and an offshore account, things like that. And if not…trash 🫣 This could be something you were raised with, a sort of generational curse passed down through the family, in which case this person has shown this to you, so that it’s conscious, so it may heal…and hopefully not spread further down the line. You may also be a tireless workaholic that values money over relationships, a common theme with heavy/dominant earth placements. You didn’t see this person’s “value” to you, or they were made to feel “less than”, so they left.

This person is learning The Hierophant from you…could be counseling is needed, for the worst case scenarios. This is a person that wants “the right thing”, the moral thing, whether long term commitment, something more in line with their spiritual beliefs, an old fashioned way of existing, possibly to follow family traditions in some way. They’ve realized their goals, they know there is a specific path for them to follow, and they know that you’re not the one that they can do this with. Hermit & 10 Wands rev is completely giving up and heading off on their own, they have a dream and they’re going to get it, with or without you. Future potential is Death, they’re finding their 9th and 10th Cup, or the happy ending you felt was so “illogical”, I heard that loud and clear. If you were married, divorce is the outcome. Because you both feel happy this is over, I have no doubt that you have also found your 9th & 10th Cup. You both learned what you needed by not getting it from each other 🧡

Zodiac messages:

MARS - VIRGO - 10TH HOUSE

- The drive for methods for the healing power of your destiny.

- The confronting of the analyzing of where you’re going.

- Action resulting from the perfectionism of your career.

Possible signs:

Cancer, Pisces & Scorpio - Taurus, Virgo & Capricorn are heaviest, but every sign is here

It seems like you’re my song sign lately Virgo, I only knew the chorus but it kept going round and round in my head so here you go 🥃

[jananakookie]

Rumor Has It | pjm - Chapter 6

💬 Pairing: Jimin x OC (Reader)

💬 Genre/Tags: enemies(?) to lovers, fake-dating au; angst, fluff, smut

💬 Chapter warnings: sex-talk but nothing too spicy, foul language, mentions of divorce, mentions of incompetent father figure (not important for the story or heavy in general but just so you know)

💬 Word count: 7.5k

💬 Recap:

Rumor has it, Park Jimin is single again after his latest girlfriend cheated on him with his best friend.

Rumor has it, he's willing to get back at them.

Rumor has it, you're the perfect means to an end.

A/N please consider reblogging and commenting if you enjoyed 💚

Previous Chapter - Index - Next Chapter

Chapter 6: Not that different.

It's been several weeks since you met Jimin's parents, and neither you nor he talked about what happened at the bonfire after the two of you were left alone. You prefer it that way, and you don't see any benefit to it anyway, since it will never happen again - that much is clear. 

It was a drunken mistake from both of your ends. A mishap resulting from the fact that both of you were under pressure all day and let loose in the evening. A bit too loose, yes - and yet, it doesn't have to mean anything. 

Talking about it would only give it more meaning than it has. Nothing has changed. You still have a goal to achieve and you haven’t changed your opinion on Jimin either. He’s still the annoying prick that gives you a headache on a daily and nothing will change that.

Yes, casual sex wouldn’t necessarily mean that would have to change - you’re perfectly aware of that yourself. Many people have a non-strings-attached relationship with a person they don’t necessarily like outside the bedroom, and there is nothing wrong with that, of course. However, you cannot help but think about the talk you had with Jungkook a while ago. The one where he specifically told you to be aware and not get in too deep, and you feel like sleeping with Jimin would definitely count as getting in too deep - no pun intended. 

And why the hell does it feel like you're trying to convince yourself? All of this should go without question. You seriously feel like the biggest idiot for even considering this could ever be a possibility. Ew. 

Sure, it’s been such a long time since you had the company of other people, especially guys, but that's no excuse to have these thoughts about Jimin.

He’s handsome, and he kisses well. You’re too damn sexually frustrated to resist this temptation when you’re not master of your senses which means, you will have to stay sober from now on. 

No more alcohol in the presence of Park Jimin. That sounds doable. You can surely manage. You just hope it is also in his interest not to complicate your agreement and keep it as non-physical as possible.

“You’re unusually quiet today, is something wrong?” 

Your silent stare into space is interrupted by Jimin's voice, and you have to blink a few times until your eyes manage to focus on him. 

“Do you sometimes miss having sex?” you blurt out, immediately taking him off guard with it. It surprises you as well, but you blame it on the fact that he interrupted your intense flow of thoughts so abruptly.

You watch as his eyes widen for just a split second before they’re back to normal, weirdly mustering you while a grin slowly forms on his lips. 

“If there is one thing I'll never get used to, it's your loose mouth and your ability to say the most random shit at the most unfitting times,” he chuckles scratching the nape of his neck. If you didn't know any better, you'd almost say your question made him shy. “Uhm, may I know why you are suddenly asking me this?”

Pretty unbothered, you shrug your shoulders while picking a grape out of his fruit salad, gradually ignoring the glare he sends you right after since you now know he doesn’t actually mind you stealing them. 

“I’m just wondering. Hookups aren’t an option for you these days without revealing our secret, so… I figured you must be sexually frustrated at times, no?”

He devolves into a burst of throaty laughter, pushing the bowl with the fruit salad a little closer to you so you don't have to reach so far while keeping his eyes locked with yours. “I’m aright. I am not a caveman, nor am I a teenager, so I do have some self-control, you know?” He explains, leaning his face a bit closer before whispering, “and I still have a well-functioning hand.”

You automatically lean back into your seat with your face showing nothing but pure revulsion. “Disgusting, Park.”

“Hey, you were the one interested in my sex life,” he chuckles, holding his hands up in feigned surrender. 

“I just wanted to know if you sometimes feel frustrated. Not how you take care of it,” you declare, rolling your eyes while you try to hide a grin of your own.

“Same difference,” he shrugs, offering you a wink. “But going back to my original question - Why?” Resting his arms on his elbows, he rests his head on his clenched fist and smiles at you as if waiting for a bedtime story. 

The reason why you have avoided this question until now should be obvious, but you should have expected it. And it's not uncomfortable for you either - quite the opposite actually, since you’re only human, and stuff like that is nothing out of the ordinary. You just don't know exactly how to explain your curiosity to Jimin without giving him the wrong idea.

Munching on a couple more grapes, you muster him while pursing your lips. “I just had a guess,” you shrug, seeing Jimin furrow his eyebrows at you immediately as if offended, and you laugh. “I know what sexual frustration looks like, Park. I built this city. And I’ve been living here for a while now.” 

A deep laugh escapes Jimin’s lips while he shakes his head, but he halts for a quick moment as if to think about his next words before he clears his throat, making it clear that he’s gonna say it anyway.

“Wanna know what I like about you?” he asks in a serious tone, looking like he’s not only surprising you, but him as well with his bold words. 

You take a moment before you nod your head in an unsure manner. “Depends. Am I going to regret it?” 

“No, I’m being genuine, I promise,” he says, sending a small but honest smile your way as you nod again, silently telling him to continue. 

“You’re not afraid or embarrassed to be honest with me. That’s pretty cool,” he admits, becoming sheepish right after while he clears his throat. 

To be completely honest, you didn’t expect that but smile, shrugging your shoulders a little to shake the awkwardness off. “I mean, yea. I don’t know why it never feels awkward with you,” you agree, chuckling quietly. 

“Must be because I’m so amazing,” he winks, biting his lip. A couple weeks ago you would have gagged at this scene, but you know he doesn't really mean it.

“Or maybe I just don’t care what you think of me,” you return the wink, and grin brightly, feeling that you got the upper hand again.

He scoffs, shaking his head with a grin of his own. “So predictable.”

“Mhm… and does that tell you more about you or me?” You fire back, biting your lip to suppress your own smile. 

Jimin smiles at you for a while and you do the same. And it's just about to get awkward again when he shakes his head as if to try and remember what this conversation was actually about before you drifted off to… whatever this was. 

“So what exactly is the point of this conversation, ___? Would you like to offer me something?” He gradually bites his lip while grinning and wiggles his eyebrows, thinking exactly about what you did not want him to think, but it’s not a surprise. He's still Jimin.

“Not at all. As I said, I was just wondering,” you say, breaking eye contact with him and shaking your head slightly.

“Are you sure? I like to help where I can,” he smirks, seeing you scoff at his lame attempt at flirting.

“I’m not that desperate yet,” you chuckle, shaking your head immediately. 

“Funny you say that now because I have a feeling that’s not always true,” he mutters, while he lowers his gaze and concentrates on eating again. It seems like you shouldn't have heard that, and you almost wouldn't have if you weren't still waiting for an answer anyway. 

Whether there is a hidden meaning behind his words or not, you don’t find out because he soon after changes the topic when he starts asking you about an assignment he didn’t understand. 

Jimin left just a few minutes ago because he had to go to the bathroom but your concentration, which you actually wanted to direct to your paper, is already interrupted when you suddenly feel the presence of a person next to you.

“Back so soon? Don’t tell me you missed me already,” you grin as you finish the sentence you were already typing out. 

Your words get stuck in your throat, however, as you look up, and it's not Jimin who is looking down at you. Instead, it's Yeji, as in Jimin’s ex-girlfriend, who never even acknowledged your existence before this whole fiasco. 

But now she’s here, and she obviously wants something from you, considering there isn’t really anyone else close enough to be her person of interest right now. 

“Uhm, can I help you?” you look at her, unsure of what’s about to come. Seeing how you never exchanged a word with Lee Yeji before you have no idea what she could want from you. Well, you actually do have an idea because if there is anything connecting the two of you it has to be Jimin, no?

“Don’t worry. I’m not here to cause any trouble,” she quickly says probably sensing you’re in defense mode just from seeing her about to talk to you. “I just have one question for you.”

Furrowing your brows, you make a motion for her to continue, not expecting much in the first place but still interested enough to not just walk off. You don't offer her a seat, though. We do not wanna rush into anything now, do we?

“I know the opinions of the people here are very different, but I just can’t form one for myself. Are you really dating Jimin?”

You raise your brows, closing your laptop while you try to understand what's going on. She did not actually take it upon herself to come to you and ask you that question after everything that happened, did she?

 “You know what’s funny?” you ask her, looking her straight in the eyes. “You guys have no problem spreading and believing the most absurd lies about me. But the moment I actually am involved with someone, you refuse to believe it? Make it make sense, please,” you scoff, already grabbing your laptop and standing up from your seating position. 

“It wasn’t me who said you were the one in the picture,” she says, eyes firmly kept on yours. “Taehyung said that, not me.” She rushes the words as if to try and keep you longer. For what reason? You have no idea. Probably to get some well-needed information.

“Oh? So what did you do to try and tell everyone the truth?” You ask, raising a brow even though you already know the answer. 

It's almost comical how quickly she throws her lover under the bus just to appease you and get some information. But what can you expect from people like them?

Yeji doesn’t say anything to that, and for the first time, her gaze leaves yours, even if it’s just for a split second until her eyes are back on yours. 

“Well, if it really is true, then just look out for yourself. I’m not saying he has an ulterior motive, but… he moved on pretty fast.” She has the guts to almost look offended when she says that. As if him moving on is what went wrong between them. 

“Thank you for trying to look out for me, but I’ll be fine,” you sarcastically say although you feel as if it didn’t quite reach her as such. 

“I don’t know what you want me to say. I’m not trying to be a bitch, ___. I’m here because I felt sorry about what happened and wanted to make sure there’s no bad blood between us. I’m not a bad person. I’m really not. I’m sure there are lots of people who wouldn’t agree with me and you’re probably one of them, but just know that I do feel bad about what went down. I would have liked things to happen differently, but… honestly, I can’t change the past. I just hope we can move on from this someday.” 

You glance up at Yeji with your mouth agape, trying to suppress a genuine laugh. That must have been the most half-hearted apology you've ever received, and the bored look on her face almost does the rest.

Fortunately for her, you learned a long time ago to see the humor in almost everything, so you don't even hold it against her. Rolling your lips inwardly, you nod your head, making her sigh out in what you interpret as relief. 

It's not like you're going to forgive her for what she did, nor will you forget about it. But you don’t see the sense in starting an argument either, and if you’re honest, all you want is for this awkward encounter to end as soon as possible. 

To your luck, Yeji leaves soon after, obviously not very keen on talking to you either. And to your amusement, she’s quickly replaced by Jimin, who suddenly pops up next to you, panting heavily as he looks in the direction Yeji just left in. 

“Wow, did you run here?”

“What did she want?” He asks, deciding to ignore your question while still glaring at the table where his ex-girlfriend went to. 

“Who, Yeji? I’m not too sure. It was an experience I could have gladly missed out on,” you shrug, not really wanting to go into detail since you have no idea what that was either. “But you can relax, she was asking about us, so maybe your plan is finally bearing fruit, and she’s starting to get jealous.” 

Jimin groans quietly, rolling his eyes before looking at you. “How many more times, ___. I’m not trying to win her back.” 

You’re just about to argue, when your phone starts beeping, signaling you got a new message. Briefly distracted from the actual topic, you take a look at who messaged you and curse under your breath as you hurriedly pack your things together. 

Jimin, who was originally just waiting for you to give him attention again, quickly starts to help you put your things in your bag, sensing that whoever just texted you must be more important to you now. 

“What’s up?”

“Ugh, it’s my mom. I completely forgot she was coming over today,” you hurriedly answer with a deep scowl while not even looking at him as you walk away with fast steps, knowing he’ll follow you anyway. 

“Are you not happy to see her?” 

“I am. It’s just that every time she comes over, she’s asking to meet ‘my friends’ and it usually ends with me making up some big ass lie that makes me feel awful as soon as she’s on her way back home.”

“So she doesn’t know about… you know?”

“My situation?” you ask, briefly looking at him before you turn your gaze forward again in fear you might run into something or someone. “Of course not. And I’m not planning on ever letting her know. She has enough on her plate. I don’t need her to worry about me. I’m an adult, after all. I’ll be alright.”

Jimin only nods, completely understanding your decision not to confide in her, even if it makes him uneasy to know that you probably never had anyone to confide in and talk to about your problems. He remembers too well how uncomfortable it was to tell his family about Yeji and Taehyung, especially when he saw how much it upset them out of concern for him, but it still helped him a lot to talk about it. Knowing that you didn't and couldn't do that for years really makes his insides churn for some reason. 

You should not have to go through something like this. Especially not alone.

“So, what are your plans for today then?” He would like to disagree and tell you that your mother would understand, but Jimin knows you well enough to know when to keep his mouth shut. Not to forget that it is none of his business anyway.

“I’ll just take her to the café near my apartment. We usually go there when she comes to visit me,” you explain, finally letting a small smile appear on your lips. “And then, I’ll just hope she doesn’t try to dig too deep today and accepts my lame excuse about my friends being busy one more time.”

An idea of how he can help you suddenly comes to Jimin's mind, but he decides to not let you in on it for now. Instead, he only accompanies you to your apartment door as usual and immediately disappears on your demand. 

And while you try to fix up your apartment as best you can until your mother finally arrives, Jimin is on his way to save your day.

You must look like an idiot. 

You really must look like an idiot right now with your mouth hanging wide open, your mother happily chattering about whatever the hell you were talking about before you caught sight of a familiar blond mop of hair, neatly gelled back.

Not that you did it on purpose, but the moment you thought you saw Jimin outside the window of the café where you're currently sitting with your mother, you completely blanked her out.

But despite the rain, there are so many people out and about today that the blond mop, which seemed to be familiar, has disappeared somewhere in the mass of people and can no longer be located by you.

With a frown, you shake your head in an attempt to direct your thoughts back to what is actually important. Jimin would tease you for weeks if he knew he had taken over your thoughts enough that you would confuse him with some rando on the streets. Without a doubt, making it sound like you cannot stop thinking about him or some shit like that.

As if. 

“—Lately we have hardly been in touch. I've almost forgotten what you look like, honey.” The condemning, yet partly joking tone in your mother's voice draws your attention back to her for a brief moment as you sigh. 

“I told you, mom. There’s just a lot going on these days. I hardly find the time to do anything.” 

“It’s fine,” she says, sending you a warm smile. “I just worry about you. Please don’t overwork yourself too much. You are too old now for me to remind you to eat regularly and healthily.”

Apathetic, you poke around in your cheesecake while you hum a response. “Been doing stuff with friends for the most part. We’re going out to eat a lot, don’t worry.” 

Technically that’s not a lie. Since you've been spending time with Jimin, you have been eating healthier and more balanced meals than ever before. And you would say that's probably one of the reasons you've kept up this charade for so long. 

The instant noodle days are not yet missed by you. 

And even if you don't like to admit it, lunch with Jimin and Hyunjin often involves a lot of laughter and fun. Sometimes there are a few other friends of Jimin's, often it's just the three of you, and lately, Jimin and you have managed to persuade even Nayeon to join your little group. 

In those moments it sometimes even feels like you really belong, and it almost makes you dread the doom day when your fake relationship with Jimin is over, and you're going to be back to being alone. 

Being alone never was that big of a deal for you. Yeah, it did get lonely at times, but with time you got used to it. Getting used to the company of others again, however, went a lot faster. It certainly won't be easy to master the art of being on your own again after all this time.

She literally beams all over her face at your words and it makes the guilt almost unbearable. “I’m glad to hear that! It’s such a shame your friends couldn’t make it.”

You swallow thickly, lowering your gaze back onto your half-eaten cheesecake. Your appetite is completely gone now. Literally, all this woman wants is for you to be happy and live a normal life, and you can’t even do that? A woman in her twenties, making up friends to tell her mother about. How fucking pathetic. 

“Nevertheless, I would be very happy if you would call or send a message at least once in a while. Let's say once a week, so I know that you are still alive,” your mom grins, making a smile crack on your lips as well. 

“Mom, please. It’s not like I never—”

“I’m afraid that might be my fault.” A voice suddenly cuts through yours, making your words stuck in your throat. Turning your head, you see Jimin standing in front of your table, kindly smiling down at your mother. “I just take up all of her time these days,” he chuckles, smiling brightly as his gaze drifts from your mother to you. “I tried to come as soon as possible. I’m really sorry I couldn’t make it sooner.”

You feel yourself shrink in your seat as you sense your mother’s eyes burn through your skull, but you’re unable to take your eyes off of him. You’re too stunned to say or do anything at the moment. What is he doing?!

He cleans up nicely, looking as smug and expensive as always, even if he undoubtedly walked through the rain to get here. In his left hand, he’s holding a big, bright-colored bouquet while his right hand is already shaking your mother’s. 

You see how their mouths move, and they talk to each other. Your mother laughs, Jimin grins, he hands her the flowers, she gestures with her arm while saying something to him, and the next moment you see him sit down next to you. You see all of this happening but don't really hear a word they're saying. 

You are much too busy to realize that this is really happening. Jimin is really here. 

His gaze travels over you in a way that makes you gulp and causes you to shiver involuntarily so you take a deep breath, finally getting out of your trance as you sense they’re both waiting for you to say something. 

No doubt you immediately recognize this excited glimmer in your mom's eyes and watch as she expectingly raises her eyebrows, wordlessly telling you to introduce him too. 

You clear your throat and slide a few centimeters further to the window to try and put some distance between you and Jimin because as usual he doesn't understand the concept of personal space.

Honestly, he might as well have sat on your lap…

“Uhm Mom, this is Jimin. My friend—”

“Boyfriend.” 

In a fraction of a second, you turn your head to him, not believing what he just said. He doesn’t react, doesn’t even look at you. Instead, he puts his arm around your shoulders and pushes you closer against him while rubbing your arm.

You clench your fists under the table, hoping that your mother doesn’t notice, and suck your bottom lip into your mouth before you turn your gaze to at her again to see her reaction.

It is no surprise that she almost bursts with joy from the unexpected news seeing how she inconspicuously has been trying to find out something about your love life for ages — without any success, of course. So it was probably to be expected that she would react like this.

“A boyfriend, ___? Why didn't I know about this?” 

She doesn’t sound disappointed in the slightest. If anything, she uses more of a teasing tone with you, making it even more awkward. 

“This has not been going on for long, mom. I just didn't get to tell you about it yet,” you lie, once again poking around in your cheesecake. “It’s not like it’s that important.”

Your mom gasps, frowning at you with a displeased, judgmental look in her eyes, and you know if you were alone with her right now, you would meet the slipper. “You little— How can you say that. Of course your boyfriend is important!”

You can hear Jimin snicker beside you, and you would love to shut him up, but you don't want to make it even worse with your mother.

The two of them happily engage in a conversation, completely ignoring your presence while your mother asks him question after question, wanting to know everything about him and seemingly being more than smitten with him already.

It’s understandable, really. You can’t blame her. Jimin really is charismatic. He answers every question with ease, not once stuttering or stumbling over his words like you found yourself doing while conversing with his family. 

He is friendly, polite, extremely handsome, and well-spoken, and it worries you how comfortable and familiar your mother already seems with him. The little shit even brought her flowers! 

This is exactly what you feared and what was the reason that you didn’t want her to find out about this. You know your mother and you know that she will not let this go which only means you have to lie to her again and again.

As if your conscience was not already burdened enough.

The moment your mother excuses herself and leaves to use the restroom, you finally crumble, ready to yell at him but before you can muster a word, he beats you to it.  

“This is going pretty well, don’t you think?” With a bright, content grin on his face, he leans back in his seat. 

The moment he lifts his arm and wraps it around your shoulders again, you snap. Grabbing his arm, you immediately push him off with force before you bark at him. 

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?!”

Jimin is visibly surprised by your sudden outburst, and he takes a couple of moments before he clears his throat and runs his fingers through his hair, a slight frown now visible between his eyes. 

“I’m… having a nice little chat with your mother,” he states in a calm voice, obviously not seeing anything wrong with what he’s doing. “She’s nice. I think she likes me too,” he adds, raising his brows in question when your only response is a loud, annoyed groan before you lean your elbows on the table and slap your hands over your face.

“No no no no no…” you silently chant to yourself, your voice coming out muffled. “This is bad. This is so bad.”

“What is?“ Jimin asks, sounding unbothered as if to silently tell you that you're overreacting. 

You face him again, and for a split moment, you seriously consider smacking the back of his head. “My mom likes you, Jimin! She really likes you,” you sigh. 

“So?” He scoffs. “Of course she does. I’m amazing. I thought you’d be happy about that. I mean… isn’t that what normal people want? For their parents to like their boyfriend?”

“But that’s the thing, Jimin!” you groan, gaping at him with your eyes opened wide. “You are not my boyfriend. And when we ‘break up‘, she’ll be sad about that now,” you explain, annoyed that you even have to do that. “Even worse, she'll want me to pour my heart out to her or something!”

Jimin stays silent, pressing his lips together while he draws his eyebrows together in a slight frown. “Why do you always have to do that?”

“Do what?” 

“Worry about things, that haven’t even happened yet. You always do that. Why can’t you just enjoy things as they are from time to time?”

“What do you even mean? There isn’t anything to enjoy. This is an act, you remember? And it will end soon, and then—”

“See? You’re doing it again. You’re so uptight. Just let loose for once and live a little.”

“Excuse me?” you scoff, feeling offended.

“What? It’s true. I can offer you a jacket when you forgot yours and you’d be like ‘don’t do that Jimin, we aren’t actually dating’, or I could pay for food when we’re alone and you’d say ‘stop it Jimin, you’re not actually my boyfriend’, and now I can’t even be liked by your mom without you complaining about her being sad when we eventually break up. It’s annoying. Your mantra is making a mountain out of a molehill.”

“Well, what else do you want me to say? I’m just trying to do the job and stay focused. Stay rational. As we both agreed from the start. I didn’t want my mom to find out about us. That was not part of the deal. Not to forget that it was not necessary for her to ever find out about this in the first place!” Even though you are already boiling with rage, you try to be as discreet as possible and not raise your voice. But it’s hard. It’s so hard right now. 

“I even told you that I did not want my mother to know about it. Several times,” you hiss, shaking your head in disbelief. 

“I know,” he sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “But I just wanted to help. You were complaining about her asking about your friends and stuff earlier, and I thought—”

“You thought just showing up here and pretending to be my boyfriend would magically make it better?” You scoff. “All you have achieved is that you have only made things worse. For you it seems to be the easiest thing in the world to lie to your family, you don't even bat an eye when you do it, but I'm not like that. This fucking sucks, Jimin.”

You cross your arms in front of your chest and stubbornly look out the window without exchanging another word with him. 

It may be childish behavior, but you don't feel like talking to him anymore. Fortunately, he seems to feel the same way, because he also doesn't say a word to you. And so it comes that you both keep silent until your mother comes back from the restroom and directly joyfully continues her previous conversation with Jimin in which he immediately engages without letting on anything.  

And even if your mother doesn’t seem to notice anything, you sure do. Because it is obvious that your words have not left him untouched. 

Hours passed, your Mom has left, and you’re seriously happy you somehow survived the day without any major problems occurring. She bought your little lie and was more than happy to spend the day with not just you, but Jimin as well and it’s eating at you.

It makes you shoot daggers from your eyes into the bathroom door behind which Jimin is just now, a shallow beam of light shooting out from under the door, the only recognizable sign that there is anyone else in the apartment besides you.

To be honest, you’re quite surprised he’s still here. Your mother left fairly late, seeing how she was too engrossed in getting to know your boyfriend and swooning over him. You internally cringe just thinking about it. 

It’s going to be so embarrassing having to explain to her why she won’t ever meet him again. Even if you were able to push it to the back of your mind for the past couple of hours for your Mom's sake, you’re still mad at Jimin for pulling that stunt out of the blue earlier. 

This boy just never stops complicating things for you, and you don’t get why he does the things that he does. 

“So, it’s just you and your mom?” Jimin asks, which is the first thing he does as soon as he comes out of the bathroom and joins you in the kitchen.

You nod, not turning your attention from washing the dishes. Jimin wordlessly grabs a towel to dry up and help you finish sooner. 

“My parents divorced when I was still very young. Haven’t really seen my Dad ever since, but we were never that close anyway, so it’s whatever. I always had a much stronger bond with my mother.”

Jimin hums, thinking for a moment before he speaks again. “Do you miss him sometimes?”

You shrug, taking a brief moment to answer, and Jimin studies the way your brows draw together while you seem deep in thought. He’s afraid he asked too much, scared of being too nosey, but to his relief, you shake your head soon after with your lips forming a small pout. 

“Can’t say that I do,” you say, once again looking at him for just a blink of an eye before turning back to work. “As I said, we were never that close. I barely have any memories of him doing... well, anything with me really. It was always my mom who did the most work which is also why they ended up getting a divorce. He was never much of a father figure anyway.”

“Sounds like you aren’t upset about it,” he wonders, a little surprised by your nonchalant tone. 

You laugh shortly, but to Jimin, it seems genuine, which confuses him even more. Shouldn’t you be hurt or angry? Last time he checked, most people didn’t like their fathers leaving them without a trace. 

“What do you want me to do? Cry about it? Should I curse and insult him?” You joke.

“No, but… don’t you care?”

“I was nine when they split, Jimin,” you explain in a calm, very collected voice with a face showing no trace of any foul emotion. “I had plenty of time to be angry about it when I was younger, but now? I think I can understand him. He wasn’t happy with his life, so he left. Stuff like that happens all the time, and there’s nothing we can do about it. My mom and I managed just fine on our own. Trust me, It’s easier to live your life without someone who doesn’t really want to be in it in the first place. I barely ever saw him after he left, but he made sure to support us financially and he still sends me a card every year on my birthday. Was he a good dad? Hell no, but he did what he could, I guess. Not everyone’s cut out to be a parent.”

Jimin doesn’t say anything after that for a long time. It makes you wonder if you said something wrong.

You didn’t. Jimin just doesn’t really know what to say. You clearly have made your peace with the situation so there isn’t really anything for him to say against it. 

“I guess it probably drew you and your mom even closer,” he suddenly speaks up again. “It’s obvious you guys share a tight bond.”

“We do, and I’m very happy it’s like that,” you smile, not really looking at him as you put away the cups and plates, Jimin has already dried. 

“I’m sorry I made you lie to her,” his voice suddenly appears behind you, sounding a lot smaller and quieter than it usually does. 

You turn around to face him, mustering the look on his face. “Yea, I’m not gonna lie, that really bugs me. Although I’ve kinda been lying to her for the past couple of years now when it comes to me and any social contacts so… I guess it’s not that big of a deal.”

Jimin knows you’re not happy with him right now. Not that you ever are, but this time he really feels bad about it, knowing how uncomfortable you must have felt the whole day. He knows how bad it feels to lie to your family about this kind of thing, but at least he made the decision himself. You didn’t have that luxury, and it’s his fault. It’s not that he meant for you to feel this way, he just didn’t think things through - again. 

“That wasn’t my intention. I honestly just wanted to help but ended up making it worse for you. I’m sorry. Didn’t really think about the consequences,” he apologizes, looking a little embarrassed.

You loudly exhale through your nose, jokingly rolling your eyes at him. “How about you stop trying to help or do things for me?” You suggest, grinning at him slightly. “’Cause honestly, you’re pretty shit at it.”

Jimin purses his lips while slightly nodding his head in agreement. “I might consider it. Can’t really disagree with you here.”

You snort out a laugh and smack him with the towel which makes him laugh as well while he tries to avoid getting hit a second time - without much success. 

“Why did you lie to me that time at my parents’?” Jimin asks, making your head shoot up as soon as he finishes, making it clear you immediately know what he’s talking about even without him having to go into detail. 

You gulp, lowering your head again because looking at him would add another layer of awkwardness right now, and you don’t need that. 

“Yes, I noticed. No, it was not hard to tell you were lying. Not at all,” he adds after a while of you not giving him an answer. 

“It’s not like it would have changed anything,” you scoff. “I was just drunk. Saying and doing things I didn’t mean. And so were you. It didn’t mean anything, so why talk about it?”

Jimin doesn’t instantly say anything to that but he’s watching you intently before shaking his head as he sends an arrogant smirk your way. “You sure about that? Because it didn’t really seem that way when you were—”

“Alright, we get it!“ You interrupt him, knowing exactly what he’s going to say. Turning your back on him, you ignore his mocking laughter. 

“No, but seriously, why are you always so keen on not crossing any boundaries? I understand that our situation is a bit… unusual, and it’s not like I’m asking you to have sex with me, but we can be friends. There is nothing to say against getting along well with each other.” 

Jimin halts for a moment to see if you’re going to contradict, but when he sees no reaction whatsoever on your face, he continues with a sigh. 

“I like teasing you because it’s fun, and you look like a puffer fish when you’re about to snap at me which is a bit cute— however, that doesn’t mean that I don’t like you or that you constantly have to be on edge with me. I’m really trying here. Why can’t I be friendly without you immediately going for my neck?”

Having your arms crossed over your chest, you roll your eyes when he finishes his little speech. “Want to send a little prayer, or are you done?” 

Jimin scoffs at your incapability of being serious, but you think you can see him trying to hide a little smile as he leans against your kitchen counter and sends a defeated look your way. 

“You’re a bit much sometimes, Jimin.” You tell him, being as honest as you can. “Ever since we got into this fake relationship thing, you've been around me constantly. And that can be pretty overwhelming at times.”

“Why? Are you scared you could catch feelings for me?” He smirks, wiggling his brows, obviously back in joking mode, whereas you gulp and shrug your shoulders as your eyes drift from him to the floor.

“Maybe.” It comes out in a small voice, but Jimin still hears you clearly, and it wipes the grin off his face almost instantly.

“Oh.”

“It’s not what you think, Park,” you quickly add, not wanting him to get the wrong idea. “Please don’t get ahead of yourself,” you then scoff, rolling your eyes when his expression tells you he already did have the wrong idea. “At this point, even if I tried to deny it, I just have to accept that I obviously am very desperate, okay?” 

Jimin is frowning now, eyebrows knitted together as he inspects your face.

“Yesterday while shopping, a stranger held the door open for me, and I got flustered and giggled while thanking him. I giggled, Park! I got flustered because a stranger did not slam the door in my face! What is happening to me?”

Jimin doesn’t answer as he bursts into laughter, very visibly amused by your distress, whereas you start to pout, seeing how he doesn’t take you seriously at all. 

“I’m not joking,” you mutter, feeling your ears getting hot. Granted, it does sound pathetic and a little dramatic, you can admit that. But it doesn't change the fact that it is a true story after all. 

“In any case, it's important to me that we maintain a certain distance. When all this is over, we’ll just go back to being strangers anyway,” you shrug, getting back to work and putting some of the dishes back into the cupboards.

Jimin’s laughter has died down. Your words were pretty harsh and Jimin knows you didn't mean it sarcastically either. Even though your way of being straightforward and always honest with him is something he really admires and likes about you since it’s refreshing, it can be just as hurtful sometimes. 

He knows that you don't do it on purpose because you want to hurt him but because it's your way. It honestly took some getting used to on his part, but he thinks he can manage by now. 

And still, when you say stuff like that and then act as if nothing happened, it pisses him off. 

“You were wrong by the way,” his voice suddenly interrupts the silence you were about to enjoy, and you turn back around to face him again, not quite knowing what he means.

“I don’t enjoy lying to my family. And it’s not easy for me either.”

His voice is calm and collected, and his eyes do not stray from you which allows you to see the disenchantment in them again, just like you did earlier. You’re struck with a pang of guilt when you notice it, feeling bad about never being able to shut your damn mouth, especially in the heat of a moment.

You didn’t mean it like that when you accused him of that. It was just the frustration and anger getting the best of you, and you regretted your words as soon as they left your lips. There is no doubt that he loves and respects his family very much, and you should not have said something like that. Especially since you aren't any better. You have been lying to your mother for years, inventing friends and stories that don't exist only because you’re ashamed to tell her who you actually are.

“I know. I didn’t have the right to say that to you. Not in my position,” you scoff at your own stupidity and shake your head as you feel a headache coming up. 

“Well, you have every right to be mad at me. We did talk about our families before, and you told me more than once that you wouldn’t want her to find out, so yea… that’s completely on me again. I can see how that would make you mad.”

You purse your lips and muster him slightly. “See? This is literal proof that you are in fact, able to have clear thoughts so why don’t you ever decide to think before you act?” You then ask, smirking a little. 

After that, the atmosphere between you starts to be a little lighter again, and it is very much appreciated by both of you. 

Without any more words, he quickly helps you put away the rest of the washed dishes and then announces that he is slowly making his way home.

“Your mom is very nice by the way, and she cares about you a lot,” he says while putting his jacket on while on his way to your door. “She would understand. I’m about 99% sure she wouldn’t judge or blame you.”

You of course know what he’s digging at, but there is one thing you don’t quite understand. 

“Who said anything about her judging me?”

Jimin offers you a kind smile while his hand already goes for the knob on your front door to open it. 

“We’re not that different, you know, babygirl?” 

And with a last obnoxious wink, he walks out, wishing you a good night without actually turning around to look at you again. 

You keep standing there a little dumbfounded for a while, looking after him until he’s gone around a corner and you can’t see him anymore before you frown and scoff, closing your door. 

“We are very much different, Park Jimin.”

tagged: @ggukkieland | @ttaeby | @rkvi | @cuteipat | @pjiminslove | @mawwnsterr | @aamalaaa | @spideyxxboi | @lil-sracha | @katsbqbe | @bex-92br | @natalie-rdr | @canarystwin | @wespers-jaan | @bangtanxcoffee | @bri-mal | @so-kou | @lonleycoffee | @rjsmochii | @kiwiaroha | @chimchimmarie | @scoupshawt | @xmochiloverx | @kristinkristinuk | @thejiminshieffect | @yes-fangirl-things

[idontblushsrry]

Hikaru Hitachiin||SFW Alphabet

A/N: Will this include Hikaru slander? Yes. Hikaru stans come get ur food, enjoy!

Word Count: 2219

A: Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Hikaru shows affection physically. He’s much too prideful to admit (bar the rare and private confessions of adoration and love) his love for you through words or actions and he prefers to receive instead of give gifts. But a little arm around your shoulder, holding your hand in his pocket, small pecks on the cheek and you more than know how much Hikaru loves you.

B: Best Friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Hikaru likely becomes best friends with you via pranks. He takes note of you when you catch him trying to mess with Tamaki and give him a few pointers on how to better scare the poor blonde. From there, it’s history.

C: Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Hikaru loves to cuddle. He becomes especially clingy at night at which point all he wants to do is hold you. When he’s away from you, he still prefers to cuddle with something so he’ll substitute you for a pillow. Not the same but it gets the job done until he can return home to you and get wrapped up in your arms again.

D: Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Hikaru likes the idea of settling down. He’d definitely want to head to the countryside or somewhere mountainous that’s surrounded by beaches. He likes the thought of you and him being together in your own little pocket of the world. As for cooking and cleaning, he can’t do either and has no interest in doing so, so he’d probably pay a few servants to do the work for him.

E: Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

If Hikaru had to break up with you, it’d likely be the result of both of you needing to part ways so that you can work on yourselves before trying to give the relationship another shot. Hikaru generally acts unaffected (and depending on the length of your relationship, he is) but deep down he resolves to become better for you.

F: Fiance(e) (How would they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

He doesn’t really like the idea of marriage because he views it as an expensive mess that ends in an even more expensive divorce. He does like the idea of spending his life with you but if yall ever got married he might just get a pre-nup. Overall though, he’s not really the sort for marriage, the legal part of it especially gives him anxiety, and to be honest, when he knows that he’s committed to you, it just is. Loving and being with you becomes as natural as breathing for him.

G: Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Hikaru isn’t really gentle at all. Like he definitely tries to be soft and tender with you but also he likes to pinch your butt when you walk past, and really is he so terrible for that? (Kind of, that shit be hurtin mf)

H: Hugs( Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Please hug Hikaru, he won’t ask for it or initiate aside from throwing his arm around your waist/shoulder. He craves your hugs and whenever you hug him it’s like the clouds part and a rainbow shines down onto your relationship. Hikaru’s hugs, as a result of his refusal to just ask for a hug, are always a little clingy, desperate to hold you tight to him for as long as possible.

I: I love you (How fast do they say the L-word)

One of Hikaru’s biggest regrets is how fast he said ‘I love you’. It was spur of the moment and he didn’t mean it, he just thought he had to say it because you’d both been dating for 3 months and he just straight up didn’t mean it. The look on your face was filled with so much joy that he feels disgusted with himself whenever he thinks back to it. Now every time he says he loves you, he tries his hardest to make sure that you understand just how much he means it. He never wants you to doubt the depth of his devotion for you.

J: Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous)

He and Kaoru are already getting that gleam in their eye. In all seriousness though, he gets really pouty and everything becomes a competition between him and the person he’s jealous of. It’s like, “Oh, you’re on track to become an olympic class track runner? That’s cool I guess, what’s really impressive is the fact that I’m 5′9″. It’s embarrassing for both of you, and you just apologize for him before walking away, dragging him along with you.

K: Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Hikaru’s kisses are a lot like him in the sense that they’re exciting with a hint of trouble. Hikaru enjoys flustering you by kissing you in as many public places as passionately as possible before walking off and acting like everything’s all normal. He likes to smirk into kisses and his kisses are so intense that most times they turn into makeout sessions despite neither of you really planning it.

L: Little ones (How are they around children)

Hikaru is kid of awkward around kids. He doesn’t really care too much for them and so whenever they’re around, he tends to just hand them off to the nearest person who cares for children. He genuinely doesn’t know what to do so if he’s left alone with a kid he’ll just kinda stare and ask if they need food or something.

M: Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Mornings with Hikaru are sweet but stressful. Hikaru has an alarm that plays music and sends confetti instead of a more traditional one, and while Hikaru’s used to the sound of his alarm clock, you aren’t, and sleep right through it. Does Hikaru think ‘oh maybe I should wake Y/N up?’ Nope. He just sits there and stares at you until you naturally wake up on your own. You wake up so peacefully and stare at him until you get a glimpse at the time and start panicking and yelling at him for not waking you up sooner. 

N: Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Nights with Hikaru are the calmest you’ll ever see him. He’s very sleepy and gets 1000% clingier. Whether it’s wrapping his arms and legs around you as he sleeps or you letting him sit on your lap while he applies both your and his face mask, nighttime Hikaru is just a clingy sweetheart trying to make up for a day of him acting like he’s not fully in love with you.

O: Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Hikaru is a very layered person. Just when you think you’ve discovered something about him, you actually just barely scratched the surface. He tries to be more and more open with you, hiding less from you. But it’s not exactly easy to break his habit of not/fear of being open.

P: Patience (How easily angered are they?)

Hikaru is a little brat, which means if he doesn’t get his way he will resort to mischief and then angry pouting. He gets angry kind of easily but he’s just gotten good at hiding it. Over the course of his relationship with you, he does start to chill out a bit, not getting his way doesn’t bother him as much anymore.

Q: Quizzes (How much would they remember about you?  Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Hikaru remembers weird bits of information about you at the strangest and most inopportune moments. Like you’ll be talking to Kyoya while Hikaru is talking with his clients and he’ll just suddenly remember mid-act that you were like school council president at your elementary school or something and completely freeze and break character. 

R: Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

His favorite moment in your relationship (although this was technically before the two of you were together) was after the host club’s ball, you walked up to him like “I know the party’s over but may I have this dance.” He accepted of course and you both danced the night away. Just thinking about that day sends butterflies running through his stomach and he swoons for you all over again.

S: Security (How protective are they? How would they like to be protected?)

Hikaru is super protective over you. If he’s out and about with you somewhere and he feels like you’re in danger (not too common but always a risk with him being rich), he’s activating emergency defense protocol procedures. He’s also kinda dramatic about it like if you bump into the edge of the coffee table he’ll laugh at you but then while you aren’t looking, he’s calling to have the whole table removed. Have mercy on whoever decides to bother you though because he and Kaoru are not above jumping.

T: Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Hikaru puts a lot of effort into your dates, he enjoys the challenge of trying to one up his last attempt as well as trying to surprise you each time. He’s not really the type to give gifts unless they’re in the form of clothes, but he’d much rather get gifts than give them. He does get a little upset if he starts feeling like he’s the only one trying so shake things up by surprising him instead (wipe that all-knowing grin off his face). Despite the fact that he’ll try to act like he doesn’t try that hard, he really does want to impress you and he tries his hardest to do so.

U: Ugly (What are some bad habits of theirs? (I’m gonna add arguments here because they aren’t on the prompt list I found))

A bad habit of Hikaru’s is that he has a tendency to try and pick fights. No matter where this stems from, he tends to try and bait you into fights or disagreements. He doesn’t even realize that he does this until you point it out to him. (Well honestly you pointed it out, then in disbelief he went and asked the host club at which point, they agreed, and he was left in shock at their lack of hesitation).

V: Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Hikaru, like Tamaki, is obsessed with his looks. He often lies and says that it’s Kaoru who’s obsessed with looks, but Hikaru goes absolutely feral if someone so much as touches any of his beauty products. He honestly doesn’t even want you to touch them unless you’re coming back from buying his stuff at the store.

W: Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

At first, Hikaru kinda treats your relationship with him like an exchange. He’s terrified you’re only interested in him for his looks or his money and so he does everything possible to make you stay because he was scared of what it would be like to be a person without you. He does break out of that dependent mindset eventually though. To be completely honest, you both probably break up because of Hikaru’s dependent tendencies and only get back together once both of you grew without the other for a while.

X: (E)xes (Any previous relationship experience. How does that factor into your current relationship?)

 Hikaru has absolutely no relationship experience as he’s spent the last however may years of his life fending off all potential interaction with people who weren’t Kaoru with a stick.

Y: Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner)

Hikaru’s only real turn-offs are people with no sense of style. Of course, it’s not a huge deal breaker but you pretty much have to be ok with being Hikaru’s personal doll. He also really dislikes boring people, like if your life can be summed up in a resume, he’s skipping past you. Another thing that he looks for in his partner is, obviously, the ability to tell the difference between him and his twin. If you can’t do that, he’s already written you off completely.

Z: Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?)

Hikaru sleeps fully and completely in the nude, like no boxers or anything. Initially, it was kind of a joke/ look at me thing but now he can’t help himself. Now, it’s fine between the two of you now, but the first time you spent the night at Hikaru’s house, only to find he’d somehow stripped all the way down in his sleep come morning, was...surprising to say the least. (You couldn’t look him in the eye for almost a month afterwards)

[downtonabbeyrevisited]

Season Two Episode Three

Conversion of the Abbey into a convalescent home for Officers is underway, ushering in a territorial battle that at times makes what is going on on the other side of the channel look like a mere scuffle. With the chain of command yet to be set, the floor is open for some of the best Isobel v. Cora v. Violet action that Downton has to offer. However, Isobel’s hostile takeover is slowed by a combination of O’Brien’s Machiavellian urges and Robert’s love of hierarchy. O’Brien tees up Thomas to take charge of Downton and coaxes him into the fray as he leans on an archway smoking his way into a wide variety of lung problems in later life. In an almost implausible about face (the key word for King Julian here is almost), Robert, Major Clarkson and Carson agree that Corpral Barrow is now trustworthy(ish), should be bumped up to the rank of Acting Sargent and be allowed to use the front door (although Carson remains unsure about the last bit). With Thomas in place and Major Clarkson at the hospital, Robert is on the hunt for another “tier” having looked at this microcosm of society and decided that there was not enough division. Evelyn Napier’s request to stay at Downton prompts Major Clarkson to enact border controls that would make Priti Patel look on in envy and neatly demonstrates the bind in which the Crawleys now find themselves. It is perhaps fitting, if predicable, that by the end of the episode Isobel and Cora are to share responsibility for Downton in what will remain the worst coalition of all time until 2015 when Cadbury will get together with Vegemite. Look it up. Trust me, it was rank. 

Having an equally tense episode is Lavina who, fresh from behind manhandled behind the laurels, is now under Rosamund’s microscope with Violet declaring her to be an object to be removed which is a bit harsh even for her. It is rumoured that Lavinia stole secrets from her Uncle for Richard Carlisle to publish as part of his uncovering of the Marconi Scandal, a historical event whose name is said loudly and clearly at least three times so that we can all Google it in the ad-break. Sensing a potential weakness, the Crawley women (who I am resisting the urge to call Robert’s Angels) dig deeper as Mary hunts out Lavinia to give her the third degree. Lavinia admits that she did start the uncovering of the scandal but not in the pursuit of a transparent and accountable government. Instead it was to save her father from financial ruin. And all of her sudden, in exposing corruption and hypocrisy just to save her own skin she has gone from being a Department of Health and Social Care security guard to Dominic Cummings. 

Violet’s concerns about the potential carnage that mixing ranks could let loose are not unfounded as Major Bryant confuses the Abbey with the Villa and Ethel takes one look at him and thinks “He’s a little bit of me”. Sadly/fortunately Ethel’s tucking in of Major Bryant’s blankets is halted by Mrs Hughes before Laura Whitmore can ask everyone to gather around the fire pit. 

Apparently more romantically reticent than Bryant is Bates, who has taken to hiding behind a tree in the Village on Wednesdays just to catch a glimpse of Anna, demonstrating a behaviour pattern that does not throw up any red flags at all. Richard Carlises’ network of spies find him in a pub in Kirkbymoorside which Anna describes as “odd” despite the fact that of all the things he has done (or is about to do) in this episode, let alone the Downton Abbey canon as a whole, this is definitely the most sensible decision he has made. It means he does not have to navigate the staircases that formed a fair amount of his plot in the previous season for a start. Rather than leave him be, Anna takes an alarmingly shiny bus to an almost forensically clean pub where she orders what turns out to be a very horrific looking glass of cider from an eternally conflicted Bates. Bates tells Anna his plan to divorce Vera and declares that he does not care about gender discrimination in the law. In return Anna shows off her attempt at using this week’s bit of new technology, the curling iron. Asked for his opinion, Bates replies that he would love Anna “however, whatever, wherever”, cleverly avoiding the question in a way that simultaneously shows the depth of his amour but also indicates that he thinks it’s hideous. 

Edith finds herself lacking purpose and direction like most people in their mid-twenties. Sybil, the annoying over-achieving younger sibling, tells her to work out what she is good at which turns out to be being a scribe, and getting books and carcinogenic substances for Officers. Edith’s quiet industry enables her to gain a good working knowledge of all the key protagonists on General Strutt’s tour which earns her a toast at Lunch. For Edith, this is the equivalent of getting an M.B.E. 

Another character looking to take advantage of General Strutt’s sojourn is Branson whose plans to be a conscientious objector are scuppered by a heart murmur. His flair for the dramatic takes him to the courtyard of deceit (a location looking to form an alliance with the tree of emotional conflict and the platform of romantic uncertainty) where he polishes headlamps and gathers intel about the impending visit. The lack of footmen leaves an opening for Branson to cause if not the downfall, certainly the minor humiliation, of the British Army. A cryptic “forgive me” note prompts some some Blair Witch style camera work to underline the sense of urgency as Anna pelts it downstairs. The costume department breathe a sigh of relief as Branson manhandled out of the dining room before he can upend a rather creative concoction which invites the question, how did he get so much ink? 

As William shows off his uniform, Daisy, coached by Mrs Patmore, continues to lead him up the garden path. William admits he is nervous about the prospect of facing the brutal reality of World War One and Mrs Patmore gently weeps across the table bringing her episode:crying ratio up pretty high even for something on a Sunday evening on ITV. Luckily, there is an opening for William to become Matthew’s solider servant which is good news for William and the budget as the exact same section of trench can continue to be used for both characters. Before he leaves, William proposes to Daisy and, naturally, Mrs Patmore accepts. Daisy’s “go on then” is hardly the most ringing of endorsements and her face resembling that of a rabbit who has taken a wrong turn and finds themselves on the fringes of the M4 cannot be reasonably described as elated. Daisy does manage to gather herself to delay the now inevitable wedding and so becomes possibly the only person in Britain who was not hoping for it to be all over by Christmas. 

Lang and his ever present mournful violin accompaniment continue to have a rough time of it. He repays Mrs Patmore’s kindness by outing Archie to the rest of the servants, causing her to leave the room in abject misery. But this reaction could also have been caused by the prospect of a mistimed crumble. It’s difficult to tell. Lang’s nightmare enables the women to bust through the hitherto impenetrable divide between the male and female staff quarters and it is clear that his days at Downton are numbered. Lang collapses as the General and his entourage retreat and his use as a plot device in this very much smoothed over view of the past is at its end. He is dismissed with a decent wage package and a good reference and is never to be spoken of again. 

Romantic declaration of the moment 

William and Daisy do not get this one as this is a coercion free zone. Instead Mary and Matthew get it. Matthew being back at Downton gives Mary the chance to stare at him longingly across a room but it is her decision not to rat out Lavinia as a reluctant whistleblower that earns their spot here. Only an almost unfathomable amount of love would make Mary place Matthew’s happiness above her own. 

Expressive eyebrow of the week 

Regular winner Carson claims the prize again this week. His blind fury at Branson’s then presumed to be assassination attempt is glorious. 

Wait, what? 

“Marmaduke was not a rough diamond” No-one called Marmaduke can be called rough anything. Sort of reminds me of a picture my brother showed me of his then partner’s friends when they were younger spelling out the name of their public school boarding house in gangster sign language. Zero self-awareness. 

“Acting Sargent I believe” Aloe standing by. 

“The bastard had it coming” I think I need to revise my previous curse word estimate. 

No particular quote for this bit but Branson delivering news from Russia made him seem like a man who had read the headline and maybe the first paragraph (at a push) of an article and is now holding forth on the topic, ready to take on anyone with a P.h.D in the matter. I do like Branson but increasingly it’s when he shuts up. 

The least believable bit of this whole episode was Isis being completely unbothered by an incoming pingpong ball. I once stayed in a friend’s house where an absolute catastrophe was disguising itself as a dog. She would eye up the limes on the sideboard expecting them to vault across the room. When any even vaguely spherical object did achieve airspeed velocity, she would lose it. And I mean lose it. 

General Strutt’s tour of Downton has an air of a politician doing a ward round. Should you yourself fear an encounter with our current premiere, you can pick up one of these cards from the News From Nowhere bookshop in Liverpool (other retailers may be available but this is the only place I have seen them). 

[hawkland]

My (mostly) Destiel Recs, Round-up #6

Well, between working like crazy on my DCBB fic and GISH and injuring my neck last month I haven’t kept up with my rec posts, so this one is going to be LONG and have a LOT and I’m going to try to break it up into sections, from oldies but goodies (some things I found on very old rec lists) to smutty delights to just tasty little bits of fluff, hopefully there’s something or everyone here. Most of these are not super-long, largely in the 10-25k range, though there are a few beyond that. With all the stuff I’ve had going on I haven’t wanted to lose sleep diving into 100k epics (especially when I’m writing my own right now, lol.)

“Oldies” but Goodies:  Here are two great fics written some time way back when but that still definitely slap.

Theodicy by manic_intent (11k) - Probably the most brilliant Godstiel fic I’ve read to date. One of Cas’s first acts as the new god is to make a new archangel. Dean isn’t exactly on board with having his soul re-sculpted into wings he hates on sight (especially as they seem magnetically drawn to Cas), but he isn’t exactly given a choice. He, Sam and Bobby struggle with how to handle their former friend suddenly becoming a vindictive deity - trying to make plans to kill him if they must, which is pretty hard when it seems like Cas is always one step ahead of him. Can Dean hold on to enough of his humanity to provide a conscience to Cas and try to steer him toward good acts instead of destruction? This is one that I can’t say has a perfectly happy ending, but it’s a hopeful and imperfect one that’s just right for how the story plays out. 

My Eyes Are An Ocean by entanglednow (10k) - Season 5 AU where Dean averts the apocalypse through a spell that “powers up” all the angels and he sees Cas’s true form - before being rendered blind. Dean tries to adjust to his blindness, Cas tries to deal with his guilt, and it’s just a lovely little read with an ending that’s... *chef’s kiss*

Lots more recs below the cut:

More great reads from some of my favorite authors I’ve recced before:

The Cabin on the Lake by DeanRH (21k) - This may be my new favorite DeanRH fic...at least for the moment. The year is 2152, Sam and Dean are long gone to Heaven, while Cas - stuck somewhere between mortal and angel - remains on Earth keeping vigil, keeping up the hunt, assuming he’ll never see either Winchester ever again. But when he starts hearing things, and imagining Dean visiting him as an angel himself, he starts losing grip on what is and isn’t real, and whether he can trust anything he sees or believes to be the truth. This is one hell of a psychological rollercoaster that kept me guessing right along with Cas until the very end. It also has some super-creepy horror elements, a novel “monster of the week”, and the hot-as-sin smut scenes I always expect from this author.

X Marks the Scot by DeanRH (15.9k) A fun little romp through history in one of this author’s great not-quite-au fics. Crowley sends Dean and Sam back in history to the Scottish Highlands to stop a monster, and while there they meet a blue-eyed clan chief who makes Dean weak in the knees. There’s something familiar about him, too. a very clever au that ties back to canon for an unexpected fix-it. Also, Cas in a kilt. Enough said.

The Hanging Gardens of Babylon by DeanRH (12k) - Sweet and slightly angsty AU. What if Dean was a gardener in ancient Babylon when a strange dignitary came to warn that the tower under construction was to be destroyed by angels? Lush, romantic and sexy with some wonderful tie-ins to canon characterizations (of Dean, Sam, John and of course Cas).

sufficient for thee by angelfishofthelord (21k) - This is a beautiful Cas angst-fest and character study that reimagines how angel grace works, particularly in regards to healing others. It covers the whole of Cas’s arc from Season 4 through a post-series fix-it, is absolutely stunning and features some great world-building in regards to the angels. (One important TW: those with cutting/self-harm issues may wish to skip or at least proceed with caution). I love that I can always count on angelfishofthelord when I need a good dose of Cas!whump and pain.

And laugh at gilded butterflies by ireallydidthistomyself (13k) - another great Dadstiel fic from this author featuring one of my favorite angsty subjects! I don’t know how I missed reading this one before. An AU where Cas is raising (baby)Jack on his own until the angels find the two of them and prepare to seal Jack away in the Ma’lak box. Cas begs them to let him go with Jack, so at least Jack won’t be alone for eternity. Meanwhile Dean is frantically trying to find what happened to Cas, and he gets some unexpected help from Crowley.  It’s sad and sweet and all the characterizations are great. A+ Crowley use here, too.

what stays (and what fades away) by dothraki_shieldmaiden (64k) - a fabulous read with some great art, too, that started me reading a bunch of fic from this author. Cas goes missing, and when he’s found he seems deep under a spell. When they finally manage to awaken him, he doesn’t remember anything of this life with Dean, Sam and Cas in the bunker. The last thing he knew he was a nurse living with his wonderful husband, Dean, and their two adopted children, Jack and Claire. What I loved about this one was the clever twist as to who was behind Cas’s curse and also how well-developed his AU world/existence was. I’m not generally keen on mundane aus or the one-dimensional way a lot of djinn dream fics tend to go for them, but this one managed to capture a believable version of Dean and Cas living a “normal” life without monsters without making it sugary/too-sweet. 

before knowing remembers by dothraki_shieldmaiden (14k) Post 15x04, a wonderful fic that plays with some meta topics in a clever way. Dean and Sam are happy - they have free will and they’ve won against Chuck, even if they suffered some big losses along the way (including Jack). But Dean can’t help but think he’s forgetting something...or rather, someone. Yet every time he thinks he remembers, the name and face of that someone slips from his mind. 

weights on my ankles by dothraki_shieldmaiden (9k) Post-15x03 where Cas ends up going back to the Gas ‘n Sip and working with Nora after leaving the bunker. A bitter sweet divorce-arc AU and what I love the most is how it ends - not perfect, not tragic, just very real and believable. 

15x18 and Post-canon fix-it fics:

Orbital Velocity Around a Celestial Body by LeverDrift (26k) - An angsty but lovely fix-it fic, one where it gets worse for a while before it gets better. Dean pulls Cas from the Empty, where he’d been living in a fantasy world with a dream!Dean who was giving him everything real!Dean is certain he can’t. Dean has to struggle with wondering if Cas would have been better off with dream!Dean instead of him. This is one that will break your heart before putting it back together again as Dean struggles with his self-worth issues.

so good at crashing in by Wintertree (36k) - Another post-finale fix-it where Cas is back, the world is saved, and things are still...not as easy as it should be for either Dean nor Cas. Monsters are gone, there’s no more hunting to be done, and Cas wants to move out of the bunker somewhere closer to Claire, to move on with a proper human life. Dean thinks he can move there with Cas and stay as “best friends”, even to the extent that Cas encourages him to go out and have sex with others/women. (And wants to hear about it after the fact!) But can Dean figure out what he really wants, and what Cas wants as well? A refreshingly unique take on what a post-series life could have looked like for them.

Delicious smut:

Empty by squirrelofcelestialintent (43k) - Every day this fandom makes me rethink my previous squicks and DNWs in fanfic. Here I find myself enjoying quite a bit more dom/sub elements than I normally ever would! I think because I was absolutely drawn in by the breathtaking first chapter, capturing beautifully the emotions of Cas returning from the Empty in Season 13 if he and Dean had confessed their feelings right then and there. But Dean’s self-worth is all fucked up, he feels there’s no way he can be good enough for Cas, especially when his sexual desires run a little bit...let’s just say outside the vanilla and he’s struggling with shame over doing sex work when he was younger. This was HOT and POOR SAM really gets stuck in the middle of, well, hearing more about his brother’s sex life than he ever needed to.

He's My Mate by Hatsonhamburgers (22k) - This fic manages the delightful combination of humor and extreme hotness perfectly. Dean and Cas catch each other in some questionable masturbation situations. This leads Cas to decide he needs to buy Dean some proper sex toys. He’s just helping his best friend out, right? Sure. As I said, hysterical AND hot as hell. 

Generals by nanoochka (9k) - Cas/Dean, Cas/Balthazar/Dean, implied past-Cas/Balthazar. An old LJ fic I found on an ancient rec list that is just scorching hot and a brilliant character study of Cas and Dean. Balthazar decides to invite himself in when he catches Dean and Cas engaging in some frisky business, and it turns into a bit of a power-play between the two soldiers of Heaven. Cas gets DP’ed and it’s all...well. It’s fucking good, read it.

The One With The Preening by HolyFuckingHell (5.5k) Can I do a rec post without including some wing!kink/wing!grooming in it? No, I can’t. (I also really enjoyed some of the other fics in this author’s series including The One With Dean's Horny Movies).

A Single Point of Light by Destina (2.4k) - This is a gorgeous Cas/Dean/Benny Purgatory short! A delicious balance of the two each caring for and caring about Dean in their own, protective ways, definitely a delight for any fans of this threesome.

Short and sweet, fluff to angst:

Snugglebird by almaasi (5.3k) - So, so soft and sweet and snuggly, just like the title. Dean’s things are disappearing from the bunker...and so, suddenly, has Cas. What’s going on? I do love my nesting!Cas fics, so...yeah. If you need a smile this is a good one to read :)

And Cleanse Me From My Sin by thisisapaige (1.6k) - another one for my beloveds who also enjoy wing grooming and sweet Dean-taking-care-of-Cas fluff.

Needle and Thread by Misachan (4k) - Season 5 wing!fic hurt/comfort. Cas’s wings are badly injured, Dean doesn’t quite know what he’s doing, but he’s stitched up Sam and himself enough times. He can do this. If you love caretaker!Dean and vulnerable!Cas don’t overlook this little gem.

Deceptive Preludes by sp8ce (2.7k) - One of those stories that delves into some of the difficulties Cas might have after coming back from the Empty a second time, especially in regards to accepting what’s real or not, understanding Dean, and how both of their communication issues can add to their struggles. Painful but hopeful for the future, felt very believable as I read it.

[klugpuuo]

almost every puyo~tet single-character headcanon wie have

every character we've put more than three minutes of thought into are gonna be in this post. this *does* leave out a lot of characters, but still includes so many that hopefully that'll make up for it. ^also i forgot about this entirely while writing and tried to add a few characters i literally never think about everat all so you get extra funny commentary i guess

welp! enjoy the ride. and dont forget to like, comment, and subscribe (/lh)

warnings: mentions food, implied self-harm, delusions (not inherently triggering but still), general violence, some madou-era content, death. (more to be added + ask to tag) none of the things mentioned are in much detail.

Madou Monogatari / OG Puyo~Puyo characters:

Arle – 16 (chronologically 20 due to the Madou time stop but doesn’t realize it), has PTSD and ADHD + nonbinary transfem + sex-repulsed and questioning (she/he/they)

Assorted headcanons:

-Her armor was made into a sort of magical puberty blocker by her grandmother, who knew Arle was trans and wanted her to live her life to the fullest. -Although she has never been in an (official) romantic relationship, she’s usually the first person her friends go to for relationship advice. -She stims a lot, usually by twirling her hair around or jumping.

Relationship headcanons:

Partners: She’s in a vaguely romantic relationship with Serilly. “Vaguely” as in they go on dates frequently, kiss a lot, and would live together if they could, but neither is sure if they are actually dating. Friends: She adores Ringo and Amitie and wants to protect both of them – not in the super creepy and sorta patronizing way, but in the “she really cares about them and their well-being” way. Despite thinking that Schezo is an absolute fool at times, she still cares about him quite a bit. She’s come to regret what she did all those years ago, and is determined to make sure that Schezo never remembers it.

-

Schezo – ~200, has ADHD and PTSD + transmasc + homosexual (he/it/gore)

Assorted headcanons:

-Although he can be away from his sword, it’s bonded to his body so strongly that if he is too far away from it for too long he becomes incredibly weak. -He borrowed a thesaurus from Aya and Klug and is not planning on ever giving it back. -He doesn’t remember a single thing that happened before Puyo~7, and can hardly remember anything from then until Puyo~Tetris 2. -After learning about tone indicators, he begins to put “/nx” at the end of *all* of his messages online. Although a few people make fun of him for it, many people find it either endearing or some form of cool, and he’s affectionately known as “the /nx anon” in a few social circles. -His main special interests are forging and dark magic (good for him <3)

Relationship headcanons:

Crushes: He has a slight crush on Lemres, and thinks that Incubus is.. interesting. He also thinks Witch is cute but can’t tell if that’s a crush or what. (Good) friends: He considers Arle to be his best friend, and she’s usually the first person he’d go to for anything. The two actually lived together for a while. Although he thinks Rulue is a fool at times, he still cares about her and thinks she’s pretty impressive. Enemies...?: He once was always looking to pick a fight with Satan, but after (rather awkwardly) remembering that he once saw the prince as a father, he mostly stopped doing that.

-

Rulue – ~40-ish?, experiences delusions + cis lass + questioning (she/her and a few neopronouns)

Assorted headcanons:

-She’s not sure why there are so many people who are like her and at this point she’s wondering if it really is just a coincidence. -She secretly wishes that she could join Arle, Schezo and Witch’s arm-wrestling sessions, but as they’ve been going on for so long without her she feels almost awkward asking. -Although she still experiences delusions sometimes, she’s gotten a lot better at telling what’s true and what’s false.

Relationship headcanons:

Partner… sorta?: She’s sort of in a QPR with Raffina, and they go on platonic dates a lot. (Good) friends: She’s quite good friends with Arle, especially since she’s no longer chasing after Satan. Speaking of Satan, as she’s no longer absolutely obsessed with him she’s actually beginning to get along well with him, and the two regularly have friendly battles.

-

Witch – >16, might be NT + cis lass + omni (she/it)

Assorted headcanons:

-The only thing she can transform people or things into without help of a potion is mushrooms. -She’s surprisingly strong and quite good at arm wrestling. -She’s not sure if she had any sort of neurodiversities, but she doesn’t really care either way.

Relationship headcanons:

Crushes…?: She might have feelings for Arle, but even she doesn’t have any clue. She’s also.. interested in Feli, as she sees Feli as quite the interesting person. Family: She’s an orphan, although she doesn’t mind it. (Good) friends: She’s okay-ish friends with Schezo, and the two usually do arm wrestling matches with Arle in their free time.

-

Satan – ~3000<, only god knows + cis trans man (somehow less than a joke) + pansexual (he/it)

Assorted headcanons:

-As he’s so old and has changed his physical appearance so many times, he’s completely forgotten his original sex, if he even had one. -After getting very literally schooled by Raffina, he realized that his plans to acquire Arle were just never going to work, and after a while of self-reflection he decided that he’d rather spend the rest of eternity doing other things he liked than chasing around an underage lass. -Due to having completely remade the world himself, he feels almost completely disconnected from it. All the people he used to know.. aren’t the same, and it’s destroying him.

Relationship headcanons:

Partners: Misses his dead wife a lot, but is now happily dating (nd half-joke married to) Ex (Chosen) family: After Satan had a good long think about everything, he realized that he did actually care about Lidelle a lot, and now properly sees her as a little sister. Friends: He’s on good terms with Rulue and actually properly hangs out with her sometimes. -

Serilly – >16, has anxiety and experiences delusions + trans lass + questioning (she/her)

Assorted headcanons:

-hgnggng operea

Relationship headcanons:

Partners: She may or may not be dating Arle. (Chosen) family: Although she’s presumably an orphan, she has Suketoudara, who she sees as an older brother figure. Best friend: She platonically loves Harpy a lot, and the two of them spend a lot of time together. - Suketoudara – ~30, NT + about as cis guy as a fish can get + polysexual (he/him)

Assorted headcanons:

-I literally do not think about this guy

Relationship headcanons:

Sibling serilly

Puyo Fever (2) characters:

Amitie – 14 and a half, autistic + binary transfem + fem-leaning panromantic (she/fae/flare)

Assorted headcanons:

-She found out that she was trans when she was 7 years old, and managed to convince her parents to let her transition when she was 12. -She taught herself how to bake, and Arle taught her how to cook more salty things. She regularly makes lunches for her friends, even if they already have their own. -She cares a lot about Sig’s ladybug friend and usually “babysits” them when Sig has to leave to wherever. -Raffina and her are the only two with two parents who haven’t divorced and/or died, but as Amitie's parents are almost always at work she doesn't get to talk to them very much. -She stims by twirling her hair when it’s long, or squishing a puyo-shaped stress ball when it’s short.

Relationship headcanons:

Partners: She’s in a QPR with Sig and Klug, and says she wouldn’t give it up for the world. Crushes: She has a huge crush on Ringo, and a squish on Ess, but she doesn’t think either of them feel the same way. (Chosen) family: She feels rather lucky having contact with both her mother and father, as most of her friends don’t have contact with their own parents. Also, she looks up to Arle a lot, and sees them as an older sibling. Friends(?): Nobody can tell what exactly her relationship with Raffina is, but the most common theory is that they’ve kissed at least twice. Even during Lidelle’s fight with Sig, Amitie supported her, knowing she truly did regret her actions and it was mostly just a big misunderstanding.

-

Klug – 14 and three quarts, autistic and has ADHD + transmasc nonbinary + ace/aroflux (he/they/wir)

Assorted headcanons:

-Although he had initially asked to be called by neopronouns just as a joke, he found he actually liked the wir/worm set a lot, and now tends to go by that exclusively on some days. -On one night he doesn’t remember, all of his cosmetic glasses were mysteriously destroyed, along with all his contact lenses. After that, he stuck to just one pair of functional glasses -He was gifted an “EiPod” by Ringo and Amitie, although only the latter took credit for it. -He stims by humming, writing, and aggressively cleaning his glasses.

Relationship headcanons:

Partners: He’s in a QPR with Sig and Amitie, and secretly wants to leave Primp and travel the world with them both. Chosen family: He sees Feli as both a rival and a sister, and now has come to see Lemres as an older-sibling figure of sorts. Friend: He’s on good terms with Lidelle, and she’s one of the only people who’s younger than he is that he still treats with respect. Rivals(?): He thinks Raffina is pretty rude, and he never lets her go without remembering that he’s better friends with Amitie than she is for more than a month.

-

Sig – 15, autistic and has ADHD + transmasc demilad + biromantic (he/bug/they/it)

Assorted headcanons:

-Doesn’t consider any sort of bug to be his “favorite”, but has a soft spot for ladybeetles, stag beetles and fireflies. -After a failed attempt at acquiring Sig’s power, Aya accidentally gave Sig half of its own power, causing Sig to become slightly more than just a half-demon. -After he scratched himself one too many times, Amitie and Lidelle worked together to make a glove for Sig’s claw hand. -His main special interests are both bugs and history, and he usually stims by repeating words he likes.

Relationship headcanons:

Partners: He’s mostly queerplatonic, partially romantic partners with both Amitie and Klug. During the first half week of their relationship, he was the only one the two felt comfortable cuddling with, which he was completely fine with. Family: Although initially Sig and Aya were almost enemies, they managed to reach an agreement after being left alone together and now see each other as both family and friends. Friends: He’s pretty good friends with Lidelle, and he helps her with bug-related problems whenever she has any. He’s also pretty good friends with Raffina even if they don’t hang out much and he still has trouble with her name. Enemies: Schezo.

-

Raffina – 16, has (canonical) imposter syndrome + transfem + pansexual demiromantic (she/her)

Assorted headcanons:

-As her family is very upper middle class, she was able to medically transition almost immediately after coming out. -She once tried to start a Primp Town Fight Club. It did not go well. -She’s the only person aside from Amitie that has two parents that did not abandon her and are not divorced. Unlike Amitie, however, only her mother works, so she gets to talk to her father frequently.

Relationship headcanons:

Crush: She secretly wants to kiss Lidelle really badly. (Good) friends: Although she was slightly distanced from them during the whole fight ordeal, she’s quite good friends with all the ASK trio. She’s pretty friendly with Ess.

-

Lidelle – 14, has social anxiety + cis lass + questioning (she/her)

Assorted headcanons:

-She feels genuinely sorry for what she did and said to Sig and those bugs, and she’s proud of herself for apologizing. -She likes playing with marbles and has made pretty big marble “race” courses in the past. -She doubts her self-worth a lot, and is worried that others don’t take her very seriously.

Relationship headcanons:

Chosen family: Despite not having any surviving biological family, she’s found a family in the form of Draco and Satan, who have been taking care of her for some time now. Best friend: Lidelle hangs out with Raffina almost constantly, and she considers Raf to be her very best friend. Good friends.. again: After a very large fight with Sig over the fact that her flesh-eating plants killed some of his bugs, she and Sig stopped being friends for a bit. After a lot of talking with Amitie and Raffina, she realized her mistake, and she apologized to Sig – and to her surprise, Sig apologized back. Even during the fight, she and Amitie stayed friends, and Ami gave her a lot of emotional support. She looks up to Klug, although Klug sees her as an equal and even spares a warm smile for her during some of his most jerk-y moments.

-

Lemres – 35, autistic, has SAD and PTSD + transmasc and nonbinary + aroflux/aceflux (they/them, he/him and any candy-related neopronouns)

Assorted headcanons:

-They are actually entirely blind due to personal reasons, and sewed their eyes shut as to not freak others out too much. They “see” by feeling the magic of their environment, and cannot “see” in low-magic areas (they also cannot read faces. At all.) -They have a sort of “vacation house” near Primp which they visit during the summer or any free time they have. The fact that it was built so close to Primp was a coincidence, but something they like very much. -Schezo occasionally “visits” the vacation house for a few months before running off on some random adventure for whatever reason. -Their broom was broken, presumably by Witch as they had fought with her not too long before that. -Su has a certain type of magic that allows sucre to read minds (or at least meaning). -His type of magic does not work on demons for a plethora of reasons. -They usually stim by twirling their staff around and messing with what remains of their broom.

Relationship headcanons:

Partners: They’re in a weird sort-of relationship with Schezo. The relationship informally started after Schezo assisted Lemres during a restless period and it doesn’t seem to be stopping any time soon. (Chosen) family: Although they want to keep their distance from their biological family, they’ve found a new family in Primp in the form of the ASK trio (Good) friends: They’re very close to Accord, having know her since Highschool (and even before she made Poipoi).

-

Feli – 16 and a half, experiences delusions and has disorders + transfem + bisexual (she/her evi/evil go/goth)

Assorted headcanons:

-Rather compulsory heterosexuality with her. She doesn’t actually have that much love for Lemres, mainly just lust and a feeling that she has to date or marry him. -She personally believes sharing one’s birthday with someone else is a sign of extreme trust due to Zodiac reasons. -She feels like her gender is influenced by gothic aesthetics, but can’t really describe it further.

Relationship headcanons:

Crushes: She still very obviously has a crush on Lemres, although it’s starting to lessen now that Lemres is in a closed relationship. (Chosen) family: She sees Klug as an annoying little brother, although he’s marginally more mature than she is. (Good) friends: She’s pretty good friends with Lidelle and Raffina.

-

Accord/Poipoi – ???? + cis lass and agender respectively + god knows (she/her for accord, he/it for poipoi)

Assorted headcanons:

-Accord secretly really likes hitting things with her hammer to the point where she’d go quite far in order to get a chance to do so. However, she would never readily admit this as she finds it to be incredibly childish. -Only Accord knows what happened to Lemres’s eyes. -During Highschool, Accord enchanted a puppet and gave it its own thoughts, personality, dreams, etc. That puppet was quite obviously Poipoi.

Relationship headcanons:

(Good) friends: Accord is close friends with Lemres, having known him since Highschool (she was his upperclassman by a few years) and never passes up a chance to talk to him. Poipoi managed to make friends with Aya in a particularly independent moment where it ran away.

-

Ayashii – >800, has a lot of trauma + whats a gender + (it/any neos/they/he/she)

Assorted headcanons:

-It genuinely forgot what a gender was because gender is so unimportant to it. -It somehow found a way to continue being friends with the puppy it rescued, even going so far as to teaching them the difference between it and Klug. -As it has extreme claustrophobia, it tends to take very long walks whenever it’s using Klug’s body.

Relationship headcanons:

Crushes???: Aya has some interest in Lemres and Schezo, but isn’t entirely sure what kind of interest. (Chosen) family: It’s beginning to see Klug as a son of sorts, and recognizes Sig as its descendent. huh what: It doesn’t trust Accord at all, especially knowing (and being friends with) Poipoi as an individual.

-

Yu and Rei - ??? + phasmaeic + (both use she/he/they gho/ghost spec/spectre and dar/dark)

- - -

Relationship headcanons:

Puyo~7 characters:

Ringo – 16, ??? + questioning (demigirl?) + bisexual (she/they)

Assorted headcanons:

-She’s questioning pretty much every single thing about her identity and beliefs to the point where she’s actually been having frequent migraines because of it. -She’s not at all proud to admit it, but she’s not-so-secretly envious of Maguro’s “beauty beam”. -She eats a LOT of things that you’re not meant to eat, to the point where everyone except for Sig (who does the same) is worried for her.

Relationship headcanons:

Crushes: She has small crushes on both Amitie and Tee, although she likes Amitie a *bit* more. Epic friends: She’s best friends with Maguro, and he’s one of the few people she properly trusts (not for edgy reasons, just because). A lot of people assume she’s dating him, which makes her feel pretty uncomfortable, but she doesn’t feel like she can really blame them.

-

Maguro – 16, has ADHD and PTSD (latter from AU) + questioning + bisexual (he/they)

Assorted headcanons:

-He’s questioning the same stuff as Ringo, although he’s a lot more chill about it. -He was pretty scarred, emotionally and physically, after an unfortunate incident concerning a badly thought-out prank, a fishing net, and a timer set to one month -He remembers all of his trauma in perfect clarity, and has good memory overall.

Relationship headcanons:

Partner:He’s been in a romantic relationship with Tee for a few months, and so far it’s been really nice. Best friend: He’s best friends with Ringo, and he feels really comfortable around her. They share almost everything, and are planning on moving in together once they get the chance to have a proper house. Good friends: Although Ris moved away to study abroad a while back, they still send a lot of gifts and letters to him on a regular basis. Also, they’ve been staying in contact with Ess ever since the whole beauty pageant thing and the two go shopping when they’re both free.

-

Risukuma – 19, NT + trans man + male-leaning pansexual (he/him)

Assorted headcanons:

-He’s incredibly interested in all types of love -After graduating school, he decided to study abroad to learn more about other cultures (and of course, love). -He really likes music, even having written some of his own songs in the past. One of his favorite bands is IDKHOW.

Relationship headcanons:

Partner: Despite only having interacted a few times, he’s quite good “friends” with Ai. Good friends: After moving away from Suzuran, he’s not been able to hang out with Ringo or Maguro as much, but he still sends them letters and gifts on a regular basis. What: He does not want to know about Ecolo. Do not tell him about Ecolo.

-

Ecolo – ageless and has so many disorders (affectionate??) + gender + probably so (it/they/he/she/other in that order)

Assorted headcanons:

-If asked, it would describe its gender as “Once In A Lifetime” by Talking Heads. -It’s trying really really hard to respect Ringo’s boundaries nowadays, and not just because she refused to acknowledge its existence for a whole week after it accidentally hurt her. -It can change into its human form at will; however, if it wants to stay in that form for more than a few hours at a time, it has to actually sleep for several days straight. -In its humanoid form, it sports several scars. -It genuinely loves fidget spinners and has this really creepy one it carries everywhere.

Relationship headcanons:

Crush: You know it wants to kiss Ringo so bad. Friends: Ex-friends with Satan because Ringo hates him. Pretty alright friends with Ex and Marle, not entirely sure what to think about Squares. Uh…: After.. an accident it caused, Maguro started to be able to remember it.

Puyo~Tetris characters:

Tee – 16, + trans man + questioning (he/him)

Assorted headcanons:

-He can’t pronounce any name longer than four letters long. Somehow, the worst case of this is with Ringo and Maguro’s names. -Having transitioned at a very young age and only interacting with one lass for most of his life, he has a lot of internalized sexism. After Ringo points this out, he starts trying to work on it, but he hasn’t been doing very well so far. -He’s also trying really hard to find a balance between being too basic and too over-the-top, but..

Relationship headcanons:

Partner: He’s been in a romantic relationship with Maguro for a few months. It’s been really nice, but as this is his first relationship he tends to go all-out with everything, causing Maguro to get rather flustered. Crush: Although he’s very hesitant to admit it, he has a pretty big crush on Ringo and wants to kiss her. Chosen family: O is his parent, Ess and Ai are his siblings, and the twins are his messed up if true gay cousins. Friend: He’s pretty good friends with Sig because of their shared inability to correctly pronounce Raffina’s name.

-

O – infinite, ??? + ???? + probably gay? ????? (any and all pronouns)

Assorted headcanons:

-I cannot reasonably take myself seriously trying to make headcanons for this godforsaken cloud cube -Squares themself made this thing (on accident?) -Anger management issues incarnate

Relationship headcanons:

Parnter: Kissed Carbuncle once eChidle: Tee is its son

-

Ex – ~40, has autism, minor intrusive thoughts and (canon) depression + some form of Guy + yes (he/they)

Assorted headcanons:

-He’s not sure how he identifies gender- and sexuality-wise and feels as if he’s too old to try to figure that out (which isn’t true, but still) -He genuinely misses Ess and Ai a lot and is unendingly grateful for the chance to see them both again. -His intrusive thoughts are usually fairly easy to deal with, but can sometimes get pretty bad if he’s left alone for too long.

Relationship headcanons:

Partners: I’m pretty sure he has an ex-wife somewhere and that scares me. Also he kisses Satan every day of his life (Chosen) family: He misses his children, Ess and Ai, so much. (Good) friends: He’s become reluctant friends with Ecolo, and very good friends with Marle and Squares.

-

Jay & Elle – 13, autistic and have separation anxiety + nonbinary + ??? (they/them)

Assorted headcanons:

-Individually they’re okay with all pronouns, but nobody can reasonably refer to them as separate entities. -After a few people asked them, they stopped bullying Ai as much, but they still “prank” him a lot. -They were separated exactly once. It was not a very good time for them.

Relationship headcanons:

Partners:They’re queerplatonic partners with Yu and Rei, since that’s just kind of what happens when you’re two sets of evil twins who like bothering others. Friends: They don’t really have many friends as their creepiness scares people off a lot, but they like hanging out with Ecolo (even if they forget about it a lot)

-

Ai – 20, has pretty severe anxiety + transmasc + bisexual (he/him)

Assorted headcanons:

-He found out that he was trans after he managed to get a sort of wi-fi thing going during a five-month-long stay in a densely-packed asteroid belt. He had actually medically transitioned before that, but nobody on the SS Tetra had the word for it. -He has exactly one large scar from a prank gone horribly wrong. Otherwise, he’s not been seriously injured by anything the twins have done. - Recently he’s started to become slightly braver in general thanks to a lot of therapy and emotional support from his boyfriend, this has allowed him to stand up to the twins a lot more. He is also more physically strong, and plans to drop kick them both someday.

Relationship headcanons:

Partner: He kisses Risukuma on the daily Chosen family: As he canonically sees Ex as a father, he headcanonically sees Ess as a sister. Pure hatred(/j): He’s no longer as afraid of the tetra twins, and sometimes even manages to prank them back on good days.

-

Ess – ~15, only ex knows. Has serious abandonment issues, apparently canon(?!?!) PTSD, and so many things + cis demilass + lesbiab (she/they/ze)

Assorted headcanons:

-She actually has a job, and on the last weekend of every month she goes shopping with Maguro (or Amitie if he’s busy) on Saturday and Raffina on Sunday with the money she gets. -She kinda wishes that she were more physically strong for a multitude of minor reasons. -Ess doesn’t actually know how to say Ringo’s name and tries really hard to hide that fact.

Relationship headcanons:

Crushes:She’s absolutely in love with Amitie, although she’s in very deep denial about it. Chosen family: She sees Ai as a brother, and the two bond over the fact that Ex totally ditched them to go patch up dimensions or whatever. Speaking of Ex, she’s very recently found it in her heart to maybe forgive him for leaving her when she was young, although she still is a long ways away from seeing him as a father again. Friends: She and Raffina hang out and talk about their insecurities a lot.

-

Zed – uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (he/him)

Assorted headcanons:

-uhhhhhhhhhh -I genuinely don’t think of this guy He reminds me too much of my ex-chosen-father -…to be added.

Relationship headcanons:

Ess is his belovt daughter that’s all you need to know.

Additional headcanons:

-Most of the Madou Monogatari gang feel entirely disconnected from what’s left of their humanity, so they identify with it/its along with whichever other pronouns they use. -Sig, Dark Sig, and the evil Sig from Sig’s Secret are all different entities. -Speaking of Dark Sig, they can actually purr, although Sig himself cannot. Klug thinks this is incredibly interesting and actually conducted several half-serious experiments to try to figure out why. -All of the SS Tetra crew see each other as family, although some have more clearly defined views of that. None of them have any romantic or sexual interest in any other member.

[tomyo]

A Vague Soul Eater Timeline Estimate:

TyI feel confused a lot when I see the characters listed as being 13 since a lot of elements don’t line up. Things like Soul riding a Harley (which are notoriously large and likely hard for a boy at the start of puberty to ride), Tsumugi (canonically 14) calling Maka senpai, and of course, the likelihood that the soul eater characters aren’t the same age. I saw a half finished draft pointing out some of these things but it began to become just a lengthy timeline. So as someone who’s obsessively documented this series for over 10 years, I thought I’d just explain the general time frames in Soul Eater. 

Warning: Long and full of spoilers.

First off, I always pictured the characters to start the series around 15 for various reasons I’ll get into later but in doing some extra fact checking, the wiki even cited Ohkubo saying Soul is 13-15. My viewing of their age is proto Maka and Soul in the pilot chapter look significantly younger than their standard design. While I doubt years passed between the Blair incident and Meeting Tsumugi on the stairs, I view their proto designs as 13 and their standard look as them at 15. Although admittedly there is a lot of information that can be contradictory as we will see.

Black Star is often headcanoned as the youngest but he is actually roughly a year older than Maka. He was brought to DWMA on the day she was born. The wiki says he was one year old but seeing as he was still unable to walk or talk, I’d guess it was closer between 6-10 months. 

Liz supposedly said in chapter 74 that she is two or three years older than BS making her around 17-19 at the beginning. I’m going to estimate low and put her at 17 for reasons. At some point I hope to find the original japanese text to see for myself just to verify if that’s what she said or if it was an embellished translation. Since Tsubaki has a similar figure to her, I would put her at the same age.

Patty is a little confusing. She’s called a Twin gun along with her sister and Japan still uses Onee/imouto even for twins based on who was born first, however Twin seems to more mean matching that literal twins in this use. Patty is probably anywhere between 14-16 but I’m going to stick with 16 because her doppleganger from B.ichi, Mana is 16 (Patty is also a bit taller than Maka which could suggest she is older.)

Death the Kidd has also been confirmed by Ohkubo to be 13-15 (which again I’m gonna place as 15).

So final thoughts before timeline listing, Soul Eater not is one of the most reliable pieces of info on the early Soul Eater timeline. Death City is in a monoseasonal climate which made it hard to identify how much time was passing but Tsumugi’s arrival fills in a LOT of details. She is 14 (a japanese middle schooler), arrives in Spring (Most likely April), Soul is still wearing a Gakuran(Boy’s middle school uniform) ONLY in the first episode (suggesting he was at the end of being middle school aged), Sid is still alive and Medusa is still around at the start but Stein shows up midway through the series, and her series ends on Halloween. I will push back the main kids’ ages back slightly for SEN. To also note, DWMA seems to most commonly take in students middle school aged an above unless there is a unique circumstance in cases like Black Star, PoT, PoF, and Angela. And finally, becoming a Death Weapon is rare and the info of Soul and Maka’s second time collecting 100 souls will suggest the minimum time progression from their first meeting to the Blair incident. 

So without further ado:

At 12/13 years old, Maka and Soul meet and pair up as a Meister Weapon pair. Both regularly wore a gakuran and the same sailor suit as tsumugi. Maka introduces Soul to Black Star who is a childhood friend and both meet his new partner Tsubaki.

Roughly one year before Tsumugi arrives, Spirit and Maka’s Mother (Who we will call Kami; her fan name from a misinterpretation) decide to get divorced. US divorces take about a year to go through and theirs finalized at the start of the first SE arc.

It was likely at this point Maka moved into an apartment with Soul since her mum left and the two seemed to have lived together for a while by SE not.

During the winter, Death offers Liz and Patty to become his weapons. Liz accepts wanting to provide Patty a better life.

Soul and Maka begin to to transition out of their middle school style uniforms as by a japanese standard, they would be considered high school aged now.

Soul Eater Not Starts

Age Estimates(Young-Oldest): SEN trio 14, Maka: 14 3/4, Soul 15, Dtk 15, BS 15.5, Patty 15.5, Liz 17, Tsubaki 17

Tsumugi discovers she is a weapon and moves to Death City in April. She meets her senpai Maka who is in the advanced class and who later gives a demonstration with Soul who is still wearing a Gakuran. Neither seem upset as they would have if they had recently encountered Blair. 

Between April and May, they loose the 100 souls they collected and Blair moves into their apartment. (SEN 4 references SE 4) A few days later, Black Star fights Mifune for the first time (Based on the Anime’s Prologues which better connect the stories).

Late April: Kim and Jackie become a Meister Weapon pair after Jackie learns Kim is a witch; they are possibly younger than the other main cast as they still wear sailor suits in the main series.

Mid-May: Eternal Feather is possessed by Shaula and is nearly killed but Stein stiches her back up. The main SE cast are likely not aware of Stein as Sid is still alive.

October: Shaula kills Sid.

October 31: Shaula attack Death City but SEN Trio kills her. 

Timeline Inconsistency: There is a timeskip at the end of SEN showing DtK, Liz and Patty becoming partners in Spring however they should already be a working team before the other’s remedial lesson. Specifically in the 2008 anime, Black Star and Soul notice someone (DTK) took a high level mission and ask a still alive Sid for information.

Kim and Jackie are moved up to EAT class.

Soul Eater Starts (Post prologues)

Age changes: Maka: 15; BS, Patty: 16. 6 months have elapsed since SEN.

November: Stein reanimates Stein. Soul, Maka, BS, and Tsubaki meet Stein during their remedial test who thereafter becomes their class teacher. BS and Soul attempt to fight DTK who is starting classes at DWMA. 

Maka and Soul fight Crona. Soul gets badly wounded and infected with Black Blood. Medusa who is unknowingly the witch creating black blood watches his progress in secret. While Soul is recovering Dtk and BS find Excalibur.

Winter: Tsubaki defeats her brother giving her a new power that BS needs to train to use leading to Maka wanting to also become stronger for Soul. Medusa briefly battles Eruka who becomes her unwilling servant. She sends Eruka to Free....Free. Maka, Soul, BS, and Tsubaki battle Free and defeat him after Maka and Soul overcome their issues and slightly awaken the black blood. Maka now is also infected with BB.

March: Year end exams more or less. Given the importance of the exam, it matches up with Japan’s placement exams.

Kid fights Crona while suspicion grows on Medusa.

March 31st: Shibusen founders party. Medusa ambushes them with only our 4 meister weapon pairs escaping. Crona is willingly captured after Maka befriends them and Medusa is ‘killed’, but the Kishin is ultimately revived and Stein is infected with Medusa??. Due to some confusing wording, a lot of people including myself mistake Shibusen’s foundation being around xmas. Realizing the actual date is the end of March, the timeline since Nov is a became a little more vague.

Age Changes: Soul, Dtk: 16; Liz Tsubaki; 18; 12mo since SEN; 6mo since SE

April: The death weapons convene in Death City. Crona starts school at DWMA.

Crona joins Maka and Soul on a mission to the Czech Republic where Arachne is reformed after 800 years. Giriko is also there and apparently just kept body stealing his kids for all that time.

Maka comes back temporarily paralyzed and BS fights Mifune a second time while seeking revenge. (We will diverge from the Anime now)

Joe comes to Death City for internal investigation.

A girl is possessed by Medusa. Crona becomes used to DWMA and Dtk puts on a part for them. Midway through the party, they are called on a mission. Kid is conflicted at finding Death’s name alongside the wizard Brew’s and Crona gets a visit from Medusa after leaving the party. Medusa tells Crona to spy and further worsen Stein’s condition. The Wiki points out that it’s May 21st based on a comment by Azusa. 

May 22nd: DtK fails to find the Book of Eibon.

May 23rd: Crona poisins Marie.

June: The 3 meister renaissance is formed.

The battle for Brew Occurs.

Maka finds out Crona is working with Medusa but doesn’t know what to do, Black Star fights Kid, and Justin Law, the shibusen traitor, kills Joe.

Stein and Marie leave to track Joe’s Killer, BS and Tsubaki take a break from shibusen to go to Tsubaki’s home, and Crona leave Death City for good.

Maka, Soul, DtK, Liz, Patty, and Blair fight some of the Kishin’s clown agents in Russia.

Medusa returns and bargains with Shibusen with her child host as hostage and giving the names of witches in Death City, including Kim who runs away to join Arachnaphobia. Arachnaphobia uses a brew tool to manipulate them.

An alliance between Medusa and Shibusen is formed to fight Arachnaphobia.

I want to make the guess that summer has passed and it is August/September by the Baba Yaga fight. 1. Because it seems like enough events have happened that 3months would have passed and 2. this would make the time skip start in spring which fits thematically (new arc, new team, etc).

The battle against Arachne occurs. Kim and Jackie are saved. BS kills Mifune in their final battle. Arachne is killed by Soul and Maka becoming their witch soul to make Soul a death scythe. Medusa transfers herself to her sister’s corpse and flees leaving behind a free Rachel. Death is captured by Noah.

Angela is taken in by Shibusen who plan to try and guide her away from the sway of destruction natural in witches.

 6 month timeskip, the main cast heals, Spartoi is formed, Justin is formally know as the traitor acquitting Stein of the murder, and Soul and Maka recollect 100 kishin souls thus officially turning Soul into a death scythe. 

Spartoi Arc Starts

Time Passed since SEN: 2 years; Since SE: 1year 5 months

Ages: Maka 16 3/4, Soul/DtK 17, BS/Patty 17 1/2, Liz/Tsubaki:19

Maka and Soul train with Kim and Jackie to utilize Maka’s grigori soul properties for flying. At the same time, Gopher, Noah’s devot peon, attacks intending to assassinate Maka. Maka ofc wins. 

Killik is sent to do reconnaissance on Medusa with Liz and Patty in addition to his Shamanic weapons. There he faces off against Medusa’s madness experimentations.

At the same time, BS and Tsubaki’s recon leads them to a memory erased Crona who they battle with. Eruka and Mizune come to retrieve Crona but Eruka is caught by BS in the end.

Also at the same time, Medusa who was overseeing both events through a crystal ball ends up in a three way battle with Justin and Tezca, the South American death scythe.

Maka and Soul who are still at school discuss how Soul has been getting even more partner requests lately. Only Maka seems aware that an underclassmen has been following them as well.

Soul and Maka witness Blair and the Chupa witches make their way to meet with Shinigami-sama about rescuing Kid followed by BS breaking in behind them to show off the captured Eruka.

Spartoi and Blair enter the book intending to save Kid. While I won’t go over it in its entirety, it’s worthwhile to point out that Giriko describes Maka as looking 15 or so (Something the fandom used often as Maka’s age). However, when he also believed she was new henchman, he said she was 7/10 years too young to be working there suggesting he perceives her as younger than she is. 

DtK gets consumed by madness and has a duel with BS. 

Crona starts spreading madness zones in Russia. Maka and Soul journey with Stein, Kim and Jackie but Soul is briefly taken over by madness.

Kid starts pursuing for answers on Eibon.

Crona kills Medusa.

Spartoi is given the order to kill Crona if found. Maka does a soul perception search but instead comes across the kishin on the moon.

Shibusen prepares for the battle on the moon while Maka and Soul continue to look for Crona. Very little time passes during the kid salvage arc and it seems to be summer when preparations are finished. I would presume since an airship was needed to be built, the final battle takes place around August. 

As Kid and the Death Scythes begin the battle on the moon, Spartoi joins Maka in finding Crona in Italy. Maka fails to talk Crona down who then heads to the moon with the intent to consume the Kishin.

Having no interest in killing Crona, the kids somewhat defect from Spartoi and head to the moon to aid in the fight. However, some of the fighters from the moon, including kid, return after struggling in their mission. Kid decides to gather allies with the witches in order to defeat Asura. 

Crona consumes the kishin and battles Maka while stripping her friends and partner. Maka uses Spirit instead and Crona becomes frustrated at being unable to disharmonize the two. Spirit explains their parent/child connection is too strong to be unsynced causes them to freak out and be overtaken by the kishin.

The meister weapon pair trio battles Asura, Kid reaches godhood, Maka and Soul go inside the Kishin to find Crona, work with them, and kill the Kishin as they rip through him. The witches protect the humans from the flood of madness that spills out and a new era of Shibusen/Witch alliance forms.

Chrona deadass infects the world with boob madness.

A funeral for Shinigami-sama is held the following week.

Kid’s coronation occurs where he announces the end to the war between Shibusen and Witches. We know enough time has passed that people became used to the black moon and BS has decently healed despite literally breaking every bone in his body but Marie hasn’t gotten her baby bump yet which comes in during the third month of pregnancy meaning probably only 2 months at most have passed. October makes sense for where the story ends.

Final main 7 ages (vague ideas): 

Maka: 17

Soul: 17.5

Black Star: 18

Tsubaki: 19-20

Death the Kid: 17.5

Liz:19-20

Patty:18

Total time since SEN started: 2.5 years

Total time since post prologue SE: ~2 years

Final thoughts:

Well, that took two long nights to write down. I tried not to give a tedious play by play and only put down the most essential of story details to help give an idea on time passage. It got progressively harder to detail time as sources started to dwindle from the manga timeline. I love the Spartoi arc so at some point I might go through that part again to reexamine some details. Japanese high school is only three years long so the idea of their story starting at Japan’s freshman age and ending around HS graduation seems fitting. One of the things that also occurred to me with the timeline write up was that Justin in concretely 17 when Crona briefly joins Shibusen, giving us someone to contrast against our cast. In this lovely breakdown we can see the growth spurt the main 3 guys go through but if you also look at their artwork in the later chapters, they also share similar slimmed features to Justin’s design. I will say, early on I was surprised how many time frame details I was able to pull out from the material. Soul Eater was always vague with the fine details but clearly some of us managed to pull out a lot from it. 

In terms of the soul collection, the second 100 souls required 2 years to get(1 soul/mission a week). Soul collection would theoretically get easier over time and experience but its hard to figure out with all the variables we saw like a major injury, an attack on the city, and the kishin revival. Then there’s also questioning how long it took Maka and Soul to sync up. While Tsumugi’s case is unusual, it took her 6 months to even partner up (though then they also flawlessly killed a witch sooo). Going by the middle + high school model for Shibusen, Maka’s efficiency and a less big world issues could possibly validate the idea they could get that far in 3 years. Applying that much time for the idea Maka/Soul are 13 would mean they started their partnership at around 9-10 years old which seems unlikely to me. Then again, Justin became a death scythe AT 13 so who knows. 

My last little thought is completely inconsequential but I see Maka as having an end of August birthday. The 23rd game to mind but I didn’t realize that was the switchover date from Leo to Virgo. Based on what google searches say about those signs, it feels fitting imo.

Well, congrats for making it all the way and thanks for hearing out my ramblings!

[phoenixyfriend]

The MILFnevka AU

Once again something that was brainstormed en masse on the GG fanworks server.

I was... very much spearheading this one, but I dragged in @professorsparklepants for a lot, because Anevka, as well as input from @fenerismoon, @purronronner, @gelpenss​, and @whirlibird. The original conversation took place mid-September of 2019.

AU where Tarvek's side of the family squeezed in an extra generation or so.

Aaronev was still Lu's generation, but he had Anevka young, and she was an only child who was already an adult by the time Lu disappeared. As a result, Aaronev let her married before she ended up in the machine (because he wasn’t desperate yet), and he couldn't risk drawing the attention by the time Agatha’s gen is being born.

So instead of being Tarvek's SISTER, she's his MOM.

Anevka formed her own faction, separate from the Aaronev and vaguely aligned with Terabithia’s.

She insisted Martellus and his branch hang out with Tarvek because being an only child is lonely, and also it keeps Tarvek out of his grandfather's sights and vague plans of body-hopping.

She is a Protective Momma who is a little TOO down with murdering anyone who threatens her child.

Agatha: you're just going to listen to your evil mom? Because no offense but that's worked out really bad for me so far. Tarvek: She's not EVIL, just... Valois... anyway the Baron knows what she's like and mostly he just rolls his eyes and tries to keep her away from Queen DuPree.

Anevka is definitely the mom that uses her position as mother of the king/heir to stockpile as much power as possible and control everything behind the scenes. Tarvek is currently trying to undermine this and wrestle back control as secretly as possible.

Wine mom with eighty hidden stabbing implements.

When Agatha is discovered, Anevka still kills her dad, but it's not like she can steal Agatha's voice in this AU, so she just settles for aggressively matchmaking her with Tarvek.

Anevka's managed to rein her dad in, mostly, because she's a powerful spark with an Undefined Husband who nonetheless has enough good connections to cause a ruckus if he finds out about the Summoning Throne, and he's too sparky to wasp.

This did lead to his early death and no siblings for Tarvek, but not before Anevka managed to fight her dad down to ONLY trying to throne the girls who were legitimately likely to be Agatha.

And then Agatha's in Sturmhalten and Anevka's just like. Well. Time for plan A. And kills her dad.

Regarding Gil...  She kinda wants to pat him on the head and tell him to try harder.

I'm not wholly convinced Tarvek got kicked off of Castle Wulfenbach, depending on how Anevka married and decided to approach things. She might have warned Tarvek to AVOID stealing information, even, if she was worried about Aaronev trying to do something.

Less "do whatever you can to help us gain power" and more "do whatever you can to stay out of Sturmhalten."

Tarvek: My mom is a bitch and I love her so much

Klaus hates it when Anevka comes to CW because she acts like some unholy cross between Lucrezia, Terabithia, and Zantabraxus and she keeps hitting on his top enforcers but with knives and pretty dresses.

Unstoppable Divorce energies

Anevka: Do you like my new dress? Klaus: Your bodice is far too low cut, please stop visiting me dressed like my ex. I'm the same age as your father. Anevka: I know, it's really fun to watch you suffer as you fail to resist the urge to tell me to put on a sweater.

Tarvek: MOTHER YOU'RE EMBARRASSING ME IN FRONT OF ALL MY FRIENDS PLEASE STOP HITTING ON THE BARON AURGH. Anevka: I'm not HITTING on him, I'm trying to make his face turn puce. Anevka: I am, however, hitting on Von Pinn. She looks like she knows how to have fun. Tarvek: MOTHER.

Tarvek, to Gil: the baron can't be your dad, he's old enough to be your grandfather. Gil: He’s at a solid age for both.

Anevka and Klaus have zero actual attraction to each other but there's definitely A Dynamic that's eerily reminiscent of his relationship with Bang, with slightly less "I did a violence, be proud of me" and slightly more "I did a sexy and/or politics, be proud of me."

Tarvek: I have a problem. Gil: What's up? Tarvek: All of our friends want to fuck my mom. Zulenna: I don't. Tarvek: That's because she used to put you in time-out when we were five.

Anevka is prime Dangerous Widow material. She didn't actually kill her husband but a hell of a lot of people think she did.

Seffie thinks her Auntie 'Nevka is the COOLEST

Anevka having an intermittent fling with that "darlingly stupid young hero, Tryggvassen" makes me laugh way too hard and also dips into my nonsense love of Otharnevka.

At one point we did sidle over into “what if Single Father KB tho”

Like they met at some point on vacation while the kids were still kids, which does lose us the “Anevka aggressively ships her kid with Agatha” thing, so I’m not sticking with this but there’s some hella fun tidbits.

Anevka: Guess what. Klaus, very tired: What. Anevka: I'm getting married. Klaus: Again? Good for you. I hope this one lives longer. Anevka: He has the same name as you. Klaus: Get out of my house.

KB isn't a widower, things are just complicated and everyone blames Lu. There's time travel involved, of course.

"So your daughter--" "Sister." "...how--" "Just... just blame my mother."

He's LEGALLY Agatha's dad, maybe? Their dynamic is parent-child. Just, you know, as far as blood goes...

Anevka wants KB to help her bag Othar again. KB thinks she means finally killing him. Anevka: I might. Haven't decided yet.

Overall, though, including KB is too complicated without undermining the entire premise I want. Which is mostly canon but Anevka is Tarvek's embarrassing, mysterious, prone-to-assassination mother.

Seriously though, the entire attraction here is Anevka having the Dangerous Widow Whom No Man Can Tie Down vibe

She's a solo act. Some flings, sure, but overall? Chaos. Refined, elegant chaos.

Anevka as Bang’s sugar mom was suggested. We were obviously all on board.

Bang doesn’t need a sugar mom, but it makes the vein in Klaus's forehead throb, and that's very important.

Bang absolutely tries to get Tarvek to call her “mom” while she’s ‘dating’ Anevka. One time he does call her that and it throws her for SUCH A LOOP because no wrong.

Anevka occasionally daydreams of a world where she could have both Othar and Bang at the same time without them IMMEDIATELY trying to kill each other. Only occasionally, though, she has evidence to plant and blood to spill.

BACK TO ANEVKA SHIPPING HER KID WITH HIS POLITICALLY-APPROPRIATE CRUSH.

Anevka: Oh look, my future daughter-in-law. Tarvek, tired: Mother, she doesn't like me. Anevka: Whyever not? You're clever, handsome, politically apt, charming, sensitive, heir to a throne, you are EVERYTHING a maiden could wish for. Tarvek: You just think that because you're my mom. Agatha: No, no, she's not wrong. You're just not someone I trust. At all. Especially since you say you've been a honeypot before. Anevka: See? A simple hurdle, dear, I'm sure you could whip him into shape in no time. I could even loan you the whip. And the harness, perh-- Tarvek: MOTHER.

Anevka sends Tarvek out with Othar for “field trips.”

It’s great!! Multi-purpose! Absolutely helps boost Tarvek’s image if he’s associated with Known Hero, gets Othar out of her hair for a little bit, sometimes he can be pointed in a direction that’s useful to her.

Othar refers to this outings as “stepfather-stepson bonding times.” Tarvek absolutely hates it. Detests it, really.

Somehow something goes wrong and like 50% of the time and he ends up getting accused of murder, probably.

It’s so unfair. Especially since of the two of them, Othar is more likely to murder than him. (It’s because everyone knows what those Valois types are like, and Othar is a hero.)

Gil: What's so embarrassing about your mom? Your mom's nice. (To me.)

She gives him head pats and lollipops. His own dad certainly never gives him head pats OR lollipops.

Anevka: Well I WAS going to push him towards dear little Seffie, but he seems to be quite enamored with YOU, darling. Tarvek: Mother, PLEASE stop getting invested in my love life.

Anevka’s job is to meddle, he’s lucky she isn’t drawing up contracts and going Full Arrangement.

I also love the idea of Anevka having one of those "sunshine embodied anime mom" smiles as she says "Oh Tarvek, dear, look at all your little friends!"

She's genuinely enthused but Klaus is heavily disturbed by Anevka smiling like that.

"Is she going to sacrifice them?" "Uh, no, it isn't Sunday."

Human sacrifice is actually garish and passe these days, haven’t you heard?

Just imagining one of those Stately Child and Parent portraits with Anevka and Tarvek here.

When Tarvek was born, Anevka has an "I've only had my son for an hour and a half" moment... and then just shrugged and rolled with it.

Anevka "Hot Mom" Sturmvoraus is one of the MANY banes of Klaus's existence, but she's definitely one of the friendliest on the list... as much as he may resent that, at times.

Anevka: Is the Baron in? Boris: Actually... [Crashing noise] Boris: He just left. Anevka, pulling on the rocket boots she stole from Othar and heading towards the broken window leading to the outside of the ship: That's alright, I'll catch up.

(I love how Anevka's name just lends itself so well to AU portmanteaus.)

Anevka definitely susses out Gil's identity but she doesn't actually DO anything about it other than angling for Useful Connections.

She's always telling Tarvek to bring his friend along, and Klaus doesn't want Gil anywhere near that family but he doesn't want it to look like he has any particular interest in Gil.

Imagine Klaus actually encouraging Gil to persue Agatha with the idea that it will put some distance between Gil and "that damn woman and her spawn." Anevka for her part is pushing Agatha towards Tarvek. Meanwhile the three of them are working it out between themselves.

She just has This Energy, folks:

Tarvek: Oh no. Theo: Whats the matter? That's your mom, right? Tarvek: Oh NO, she's wearing her 'NEWLY WIDOWED BUT OUT ON THE PROWL' OUTFIT Theo: ????? She hasn’t been widowed- Tarvek: SHES AFTER THE BARON AND I'M GOING TO DIE OF EMBARRASSMENT, THEO

The one thing here is that Anevka's not into Klaus and he's not into her but by GOD is she going to fuck with his head about it.

She’s just doing this for the Big Dick Energy of trying to Get Baron Wulfenbach.

Embarrassing mom of the deadliest degree.

Tarvek: YOU’RE GOING TO RUIN MY LIFE. Anevka: Don't be so dramatic, let your mother have a bit of fun. Besides, he's not expelling you anymore, is he? Tarvek: I almost wish he was-

Also Gil and Tarvek reconciling early on due to the immense power of being Embarrassed By Your Parents.

Anevka and Klaus getting increasingly bitchy at each other at dinner, and Tarvek and Gil are just. Bright red and glowering at them.

They’re DESTROYING their COOL TEEN CRED.

Tarvek doesn't ever wants to marry a woman who has been married before, not because of some weird distaste of so-called "sloppy seconds," but rather that he's just scared that they're going to be like his mom, and planning to kill him for his money.

Tarvek, waking up in the middle of the night: What if they really do get married and I have to have Gil as a stepbrother. Tarvek: (screams internally for a few hours)

Anevka is also that Sailor J contouring video

While Otharnevka is... this thing

Some more relevant Vibes: Divorce Court Half-Mourning Upper East Side Widow

Everyone always assumed she had murdered her husband. It was a natural assumption, but ultimately wrong. She had had plans in place to kill him if the need arose, but in the end she hadn’t needed them.

Most people grossly underestimated how complicated it was to arrange for someone to be t-boned by a semi carrying flammable chemicals.

Othar as Anevka's second trophy husband and Tarvek's annoying stepdad has a very specific energy.

That energy is at least 20% "the lovebirds take anniversary honeymoons every year" and 60% "Tarvek hates being in the room with them because they're gross and embarrassing."

This is partly fun because Othar being Tarvek’s stepdad is... a lot.

But honestly, I'm also just enjoying cougar Anevka with Trophy Husband Othar. They're actually in love!!! BUT. Cougar with a trophy husband.

Anevka makes sly comments about Othar and Klaus having sexual tension.

Also I have headcanons about NB Tarvek and like

I think she'd be supportive up until the point of "you want to be Storm King, don't you?"

Less "this isn't natural and you shouldn't be this way" and more "this is going to cause you trouble due to social norms."

"Keep it under wraps until your throne is secure, then you can come out in a blaze of glory." No dresses in public until you're king, then do whatever you want. After all, “Your Majesty” is gender neutral.

Anevka caught Tarvek playing dressup in her closet one time and just criticized the color relationships.

And you must try to avoid wearing that particular shade at all, my dear, it really doesn't look imperial.

[carewyncromwell]

Hi guys! I thought I’d start this HPHM AU Ships Challenge, just for funsies! Feel free to steal and pass it along, if thou dost wish!

Tagging @dat-silvers-girl, @annabelle-tanaka-official, @angellazull, @lifeofkaze, @samshogwarts, @drinkyoursoupbitch, @kc-needs-coffee, @cursed-ice-spirits​, @thatravenpuffwitch​, @cursebreaker-lilith​, @cursebreakerfarrier​, and @cursebreakerelmswood​! 💖💛💙💚

What HPHM characters (or MCs) could you see your MC dating, in an AU? What would their relationship be like? Why did you ultimately decide not to go with that ship, or do you still hold a torch for it?

My answers for my girl Carewyn are under the cut!!

(Sorry, I couldn’t resist starting with a recycled doodle of my canon ship, the HMS Carion. 🥰)

Andre Egwu

Alright, right off the bat, we should discuss Carewyn’s canon ex, Andre. Carewyn and Andre attended the Celestial Ball and dated until their fifth year, breaking up right after the All-Wizard tournament. Fortunately despite their break-up, they’ve stayed on good terms and still greatly respect each other -- but truthfully, I never intended for them to be a long-term match in any universe. If you’d like to read more about why Carewyn/Andre didn’t work out, you can consult this analysis, but to put it very simply, Andre was someone Carewyn admired deeply, but couldn’t ever be completely herself around. And from a personal perspective, my parents are one of those rare couples who remained friends even after divorcing, and I’ve always found their relationship really fascinating, as no one can deny they do still sincerely love and admire each other, even if it’s no longer romantically. Carewyn and Andre know each other in a way no one else does, so it gives their friendship a depth that it didn’t have before -- so unlike with a lot of relationships, their bond actually strengthened after they broke up, rather than falling apart. 

Bill Weasley 

In Carewyn’s canon, Bill ends up becoming Carewyn’s best friend. Although at the start, their relationship had much more of a surrogate big brother/little sister dynamic, over time the two ended up on much more equal terms, both as Cursebreaker partners and as unofficial “parents” for the rest of their friend group. Bill is Carewyn’s right-hand man both while dealing with the Cursed Vaults and while leading the Circle of Khanna, and even though Carewyn wants nothing to do with Cursebreaking after dealing with the Vaults, she’ll still drop everything to help Bill with his work, should he need her. Bill is the one who came up with the nickname “Carey” for Carewyn, and he’s also arguably the friend who understands Carewyn best after the death of Rowan, given the similarities in their personalities and how long they’ve known each other. I actually did write out a post guessing what a romantic relationship between these two might’ve been like if they’d become a thing, but honestly, I’ve never really shipped these two. Carewyn may not be entirely based on me (she’s got elements of my mum too), but one aspect of the wish fulfilment for me early on was that my girl could have a ride-or-die best friend like Ron was for Harry in the original Potter books. In the end, that friend ended up being Bill, Ron’s eldest brother and a character I loved when I first read the books and only became fonder of through the game. And honestly, we could really use more sincerely loving, but completely platonic male-female friendships that never bump up against romance!!

Talbott Winger

Talbott and Carewyn are truly “birds of a feather,” though one would never know it based on their respective masks. Talbott is the sort to put a gruff facade on to hide his more sensitive feelings, while Carewyn is the sort to put on a pretty face to hide her angrier and sadder feelings. Underneath, though, they both are stubborn, intelligent, and distrustful people with a strong desire to fight evil and a creative spirit. After becoming an Animagus, Carewyn would frequently fly around the school grounds with Talbott in robin form, singing songs for both herself and Talbott, and even though Talbott teased her about it, he did sincerely enjoy it. Carewyn loves reading Talbott’s poetry, and Talbott is also one of the few people who can get Carewyn to laugh a lot, since their senses of humor line up really well. Last but not least, they become a lawyer and an Auror post-Hogwarts, so they end up working together A LOT, especially post-War. I did write a prompt once about what a Talbott/Carewyn romance would be like, and I admit, I could see them being a relatively good couple, particularly since I headcanon both of them as being on the ace spectrum. That being said, though, I ultimately didn’t go with Talbott for Carewyn for two reasons. One, I thought they’d be too similar in a lot of ways (most notably, they’re way too friggin’ serious -- give each of these two some sunshine, will you??) -- and two, on a much more superficial note, Talbott was so popular that I kind of hesitated before having Carewyn ask him out. (Plus come on, for that date, how much of a b*tch would you have to be to break Andre’s heart and then snatch up an outfit he made for you to wear on a date with his dormmate?! Just -- COME ON.)

Chiara Lobosca

When I first started playing HPHM, I strongly considered shipping my girl with Chiara, once she broke up with Andre. From the moment Chiara and Carewyn met, Carewyn just knew she had to know Chiara better, and that ended up being because -- thanks to her latent Legilimency potential -- she could subconsciously sense that Chiara and she were similar in a lot of ways. Most importantly, Chiara was very lonely and desperately longed for a friend, which reminded Carewyn of how lonely her pre-Hogwarts life was, especially after Jacob disappeared. Once Carewyn earned Chiara’s trust, Carewyn proved herself to be a very loyal friend, even learning how to become a robin Animagus so she could keep Chiara company and cheer her up with twittered songs during full moons. Both Carewyn and Chiara are sensitive “Healer” type personalities (though Chiara is a bit more literal of one) who fight against their own crippling self-loathing to try to nurture others. This, in the end, though, is why I hesitated on making them official and why I’m ultimately glad I didn’t. Like Talbott, Chiara in some ways is too similar to Carewyn, and I think in a romantic relationship, they wouldn’t grow as much as people through their interactions. I did come up with quite a few ideas about what their relationship might be like -- but ultimately I couldn’t help but feel that Carewyn’s happy ending couldn’t just be about peace, but about finding someone who could challenge and contrast her.

Diego Caplan

This  started off as a crack ship for me before actually gaining some legs and becoming Chiara/Carewyn’s main opponent, when it came to my debate with myself regarding Carewyn’s romantic future. In contrast to Chiara, Diego is pretty much Carewyn’s complete opposite. Carewyn is a planner. Diego is spontaneous. Carewyn is meticulous. Diego is flirtatious. Carewyn is serious. Diego is anything but. Carewyn is ace. Diego I headcanon as pan. And yet they both have their romantic and creative sides and are both seasoned fighters and loyal friends. Diego would definitely be able to bring some levity to Carewyn’s life, while Carewyn could bring some grounding to Diego’s. Diego even has a cute little nickname for Carewyn from their time in the Circle of Khanna: “general!” In short, these two would be perfect leads in a rom-com chick flick. But this, ultimately, ended up being why I hesitated on making them official and why I’m ultimately glad I didn’t. Diego/Carewyn is a ship that could really only bloom and blossom under fair conditions, and I had trouble seeing Diego being equipped to deal with Carewyn’s darker emotions or even her more intellectual bent. Just like with Chiara, I came up with plenty of ideas about how these two could be as a couple -- but I really felt as though Carewyn needed more than just “fun” as a happy ending. And ultimately, this conflict between peace VS fun ended up coming to an end when I discovered Carewyn/Orion, as Orion could provide Carewyn with both.

Jae Kim

Okay, honestly? When I first encountered Jae as a character, I didn’t think he and Carewyn would have anything in common, but in a weird way, they sort of subvert their respective house’s stereotype by exhibiting values from the other’s house! Gryffindors are seen as these rash, reckless, show-off hero types, but Jae showcases a lot of Slytherin-worthy cleverness, resourcefulness, and disregard for rules and what others think of him. Slytherins are seen as these cold, cruel, ambitious villain types, but Carewyn showcases a lot of Gryffindor-worthy courage, nobility, and selflessness. And so even though Jae is generally a rulebreaker and Carewyn is generally a rule-follower, when circumstances made it ideal for them to be on good business terms (namely, working in detention together and Carewyn needing an ally who knows Knockturn Alley and Jae needed an ally who was a Prefect), they soon found a lot of common ground. Add to that how much Carewyn encourages Jae’s cooking talent while respecting his privacy, and it’s little wonder that post-Hogwarts, when Jae opens up his own pub on the border of Diagon Alley and Knockturn Alley, the two still meet up very frequently to swap news from their respective corners of the world. I admittedly don’t know how well Carewyn’s job as a magical lawyer would be conducive to her being anything other than friends with Jae, and I don’t think they’d ultimately have many interests in common, so I do much prefer them as friends, but their dynamic is full of fun contrasts! 

Ben Copper

Hahaha, oh god. So. Obviously Ben in-game is still very polarizing, but in my canon, Ben and Carewyn’s relationship is really complex and honestly one of my absolute favorite friendships for my girl. Ben was one of Carewyn’s very first friends, so he -- like Rowan, Bill, and Penny -- knows Carewyn in a way few others do. He befriended her before she became known as the poised, perfect Slytherin “Mama Bear,” but unlike her other friends, he was a bit disappointed by her abrupt transformation between her third and fourth years. While those like Bill, Penny, and Andre saw it as Carewyn coming into her own, Ben noticed how much Carewyn put herself “over” the rest of her friends, becoming their protector more than their equal, and Ben lamented it, disliking how he felt like a responsibility to Carewyn more than her friend. But Ben kept those feelings inside, not knowing how to properly express them when he did still cherish Carewyn’s friendship. After the events in the Portrait Vault, Ben went through his own dramatic change, and Carewyn sure enough didn’t end up liking it any better than Ben had liked hers. But ultimately the two had a heart-to-heart and realized that they both had become very different people than the kids who’d befriended each other in first year. After Rowan’s death and the formation of the Circle of Khanna, the two reforged their friendship on more equal terms. I did actually write out an AU roleplay where Ben and Carewyn’s confrontation in Jacob’s room ended up hinting Ben/Carewyn, but I ultimately think that the people they ultimately become are way too different to be a great romantic match. It makes their friendship fascinating, as it makes you wonder how such a tall, suspicious, reckless Gryffindor ever befriended such a poised, methodical, lady-like Slytherin...but even if they do feel a lot of deep platonic love for each other and I personally headcanon Ben being on the ace spectrum like Carewyn, I ultimately think they’d have very different dreams in mind for their future and would each need something different in a romantic partner. 

Barnaby Lee

Barnababy!! 💚 Yeah, Barnaby Lee is my personal favorite HPHM character, and yet I have never really shipped him seriously with Carewyn, even though I love their relationship and could see potential chemistry. Barnaby and Carewyn are both amazingly sensitive, loyal, and modest Slytherins with a love of magical creatures and a strong sense of honor, but they also contrast each other in some fun ways too. Carewyn may put on a happy face a lot, but she’s actually rather pessimistic. Barnaby’s unblinkingly optimistic and he wouldn’t even dream of putting on a mask to hide his feelings. Then of course there’s the fact that Carey-Bear is this tiny and rather physically weak thing, while Barnaby is a perfectly dashing tank. 😂 Barnaby and Carewyn are both protective of each other, as seen by Barnaby throwing himself in front of Carewyn to shield her from an Imperiused Rowan’s spell and Carewyn verbally tearing into Ismelda when she learned she planned to use a Love Potion on him. Barnaby was the one who really taught Carewyn about how deceiving appearances can be, and Carewyn was the one who really taught Barnaby about how generous and selfless friendship could be, so they both respect each other a lot. For all that respect, though, there’s a significant slant to their relationship. Carewyn supports Barnaby emotionally infinitely more than she would ever let him support her, so their dynamic comes across as very “mother/son”-like rather than complete equals. Plus, honestly, I think Barnaby and Carewyn’s dreams for their respective futures -- namely, to be a magizoologist traveling the world and to be a magical lawyer for the Ministry of Magic -- don’t match up in the least bit. I could also see Barnaby wanting a large family, and Carewyn has no interest in bearing children herself and would prefer a quieter home life. 

[im-totally-not-an-alien]

Final Fantasy prompts no 53

1. Cloud is immortal and has lived for tens of thousands of years. He has watched his friends and enemies get reincarnated over and over again. He would always interfere and save the day when things got bad, prompting legends and myths of a golden haired hero with glowing blue eyes who swore to return whenever the world was in peril.

But thats not the end.

He took great care to find his friends and keep an eye on them, watching over them as a guardian angel of sorts. When he came across Sephiroth again, he expected a battle, but seeing the dull eyes of a broken teenager staring up at him as he layed battered and bruised by his own parents? It made him realize that Sephiroth wasn't born evil.

The blond added Sephiroth to his list of people to protect.

Cloud often removed Sephiroth from the abusive households he was born into by exposing the parents for their crimes and harassing them as an anonymous individual.

Once the silverette was out of the home he would manipulate circumstances so that he would come to live with Zack or one of his other former friends.

Once he hit a certain age, he would find people Sephiroth was romantically compatible with and play puppeteer until one of them married the silverette. Cloud had done this so many times that he practically became an expert. Strangely, in the recent past lives the marriages ended in amicable divorce. He didn't know what he did wrong, so the blond began expiramenting with Sephiroths "types" again, trying to find a perfect match.

This life however, Sephiroth refused to so much as hold hands with someone romantically and Cloud is about ready to rip his hair out in frustration.

The man walked down a busy street, thinking about what to do next when Sephiroth himselfed grabbed his arm.

Startled, Cloud stared up at him.

"It's you." Sephiroth muttered reverently, as though he couldn't believe his eyes.

Cloud never made contact with these people, he had learned his lesson after the fifth time he lost Zack. He let them live out their lives, only interfering to stop something negative from happening. The blond never showed Sephiroth his face since his ninth life.

So how did Sephiroth know who he was?

2. Cloud nearly giving Denzel "The Talk"

3. Denzel accidentally calling Cloud "Dad", calling Tifa "Mom", and Marlene "my sister" until he was eventually like, screw it, and called them that without hesitation

4. Denzel got in trouble at school for beating up a group of boys that were bullying another kid.

He gets suspended and Cloud takes him out for an awesome ride on Fenrir as a reward, followed by fighting lessons from both him and Tifa, then ice cream.

5. Au where Hollander was murdered by Hojo long ago. Degradation is running rampant through Shinras SOLDIER program, killing several and weakening many more.

Genesis is determined to find a cure, after all, his life is on the line. He's eventually cornered by Angeal and Sephiroth, who pull the truth out of him, and begin aiding him in his search.

They discover AC Cloud, who is from a different dimension/timeline whose very body contains the cure.

Cloud was no longer human, and had developed new organs of unknown purpose, his body having disposed of the unnecessary organs such as lungs, gallbladder, and pancreas, and modifying the ones it kept, such as the digestive track. The catch? Now he needed to feed on large amounts of natural Mako every month to survive.

Genesis sees no problem with this and asks for the blond to save them. Cloud, however, refused, not knowing what was happening to him and knew spreading it would be the bad idea of the century.

Genesis doesn't take "No" for an answer.

Hojo finds out the blond was essentially a second Jenova and had a mini lifestream inside him and becomes desperate to get his claws on him.

6. Jenova haunts Clouds dreams, filling him with dread. Not because she was tormenting him, no. It was the opposite.

In the dreams, she held him like a loving mother. Her gentle embrace warmed him, her soft words brought him comfort, made him confide in her. That's why he was afraid.

Cloud was beginning to love her, and it terrified him.

7. Zack Fair is hereby prohibited from using any form of glitter or glue.

Why? It's Classified.

8. Au where Lazard freed Zack from under the nebilheim mansion, but also dragged him outside, leaving Cloud behind.

He lied to Zack when he woke up, telling him the infantryman was dead. He believed that Zacks chances of survival would be infinitely higher if he left the boy behind, which he would never do if given a choice. So Lazard made that choice for him.

So Zack made it to Midgar on his own.

Cloud was found by Sephiroth months later. The blond had no fight left in him and tried to merge with the other Sephiroth clone, unfortunately since his cells were mutated, Cloud could not merge with Sephiroth.

The silverette had planned to abandon this failed clone until Cloud nuzzle his face against Sephiroths gloved palm. From then on out, Cloud followed Sephiroth everywhere, doing the cooking and the laundry or whatever he could to make himself useful. He would beg the former General not to abandon him, as everyone else had done in the past.

That, admittedly pulled on his heartstings a bit. Sephiroth had also been abandoned and betrayed by his two closest friends. By the company and people he foolishly devoted his entire life to.

So Cloud stayed. His master taught him how to fight, how to care for his gear, and they bonded over shared experiences and silent companionship.

It was during that final battle, where Zack and AVALANCHE slew Sephiroth, that Cloud, hidden somewhere out of sight, swore vengeance against the man who pretended to be his friend, who he believed abandoned him and left him to rot in that hellhole after he had sworn for years that they'd get them both out, that he would save Cloud, (Cause that's what heros do!) only for him to murder the first person other than his mom to ever care about him.

Clouds body held both S and J-cells, and though they may be mutated, he could still call for Reunion. Something Zack couldn't sense due to him being an A-type SOLDIER instead of an S-type like himself.

The blond could cultivate the summoned J-cells and make them multiply under his care. He knew the best revenge was patience, after all, so long as Cloud lived, Sephiroth would never truly die.

All he had to do was stay hidden. Know one could know of him, not that they were looking for a supposedly dead man, even if they were, they would never find him in his hidden underground bunker since no one with more then three brain cells would go near the Northern Crater.

9. Sephiroth drops blatant innuendos and pickup lines all throughout his fight with Cloud, but the blond thinks he's just imagining it.

Seph actually manages to escape that time, but after the fight, his friends point out all the questionable things the silverette said.

Cloud wasn't sure if he should be relieved that he wasn't hallucinating it.

10. Tifa caught Denzel and Marlene "interrogating" a doll that was tied to a tree.

They were hitting it with sticks and yelling, "Who's your source?!" At it.

Needless to say, Reno is no longer allowed to around the children without adult supervision.

11. Kunsel began fiddling with a laser pointer, absent-mindedly tracing large slow circles on an opposing wall. He kept thinking back to all the laser pointer related incidents from the past few weeks until he noticed, much to his horror, that a few of his fellow SOLDIERS in the mess hall were tracking the little red dot with laser focus.

Pun intended.

12. Aerith had long since faded into the lifestream where she belonged, but that's not what this story is about.

Thousands of years have passed since the events of MeteorFall, and Gaia is nearly overflowing with mako energy.

Cloud felt as Gaia began remaking her WEAPONS, and couldn't help but wonder as to why. After about a year of searching he found Vincent again and asked him.

The truth was disturbing. Gaia's lifestream had outgrown the planet, and was preparing a new Omega WEAPON to suck the life out of this one and travel back to the "Mother planet"

Cloud eventually found out about Gaias plans for him by eavesdropping on conversation between Gaia herself and the Cetra from the "Mother planet". You see, Cloud has a unique relationship with the planet. He was modified using Jenovas Eldrich powers, and over time, developed his own. The blond allowed Gaia to use his body/very being as a sort of ward against all things Eldrich, and has worked spectacularly well.

Gaia planned to keep him alive as she traveled through the cosmos. That wouldn't be a problem, no the problem was that she planned to encase him in crystal and keep him there for the rest of eternity. When the Cetra mentioned breeding him so that other planets would have a ward, he nearly gagged.

He told Vincent about everything and admitted he was afraid. The only reason he remained sane all these years was because he could travel and have new experiences. He couldn't do that if he was trapped.

Vincent suggested a rocket, to which the blond revealed that Gaia herself always sabotaged the rockets and space programs. For obvious reasons. They were stuck and didn't know what to do now that it was literally them against the world. So when Vincent suggested reviving Mako energy and the SOLDIER program until they could find a way off of Gaia, Cloud didn't dismiss it.

13. Another summoning gone wrong Au where Sephiroth, Zack, and Cloud who are in the normal modern universe and are lovers in a poly relationship, decide to mess around with a spellbook Zack picked up in a shop. They were saying spells out loud and making fun of them, they also did the wierd little ceremonies and made "potions" and had a good time.

Nothing happened, until they woke up the next morning to the chocobo frantically patting them awake with his hands, stunned silent.

There, in their king sized bed, were their trans-dimensional alter-egos, done up with swords and pauldrons and...is Sephiroth wearing a fetish outfit? Said silverette poked his alter-ego with a ruler a few times to confirm he was out cold.

What were they supposed to do now?

14. Final Fantasy 7 and LoZ: Breath of the Wild crossover

Cloud lands in a new reality, but he's too focused on trying to fight the new breeds of monsters and surviving the desert heat to ponder the situation for long

And then there's all those things that keep trying to electrocute him...Clouds not having a good day.

On the other hand he has plenty of things to take his anger out on.

Also, Cloud meeting a horse! Which are critically endangered on Gaia!

15. Genesis finds Cloud post DoC and begins taunting him, but gasps dramatically when he learns the blond has never tasted Banoran apples/apple products. He drags Cloud along to get a taste. Weirdly, they get along.

[obsidivns]

✧･ﾟ: * ( cis man / he/his / henry cavill ) — welcome, [ GAWAIN “GWYN” OZERIN ] of [ WALECH ]. when the doom hit, you were [ DOOMED ] to be a [ IGNIS ]. now that the doom is over, you are [ THIRTY-SIX ] and working as [ A SELLSWORD ]. rumors have been whispered around court that you are [ HARD-WORKING ] and [ AWKWARD ].

TWs: none

✦ Full Character File

SUMMARY

Gwyn comes from a relatively recent Walechian offshoot of the Ozerin family. Most of them come from Arella, including his father Grigor originally. But Grigor wasn’t made for the artistic scene that their family had built their wealth in for generations. He left at a young age and moved to Walech, a land of warfare, and took his merchant sensibilities into the business of selling arms and weaponry. He married a beautiful young woman named Yeva, and not long after, Gwyn was born.

Though properly named Gawain, it was a name he struggled with in his earliest years. It was far easier for the toddler to just say “Gwyn”, and after a while, it was easier for everyone else, too. (He’s not opposed to his given name, but he does pull weird faces when someone he doesn’t know well uses it.)

It was also a struggle for him to spell as he was learning to read and write, though it became apparent quickly that it wasn’t just his name he had trouble with. Gwyn is dyslexic, and has always struggled with more academic subjects for this reason. While he can read and write, it’s a distinct challenge for him, and the frustration he felt over trying to learn it as a child lead to a life-long aversion to both. He’s a little self-conscious about this, but in general mitigates it by just... avoiding reading and writing things down. Oddly enough, Gwyn is decent at math, especially making mental calculations and judging distances or amounts of things. Just don’t give him a problem in word form—he’ll crumple it up and throw it at you.  

Gwyn was too young to really understand why his parents divorced, or just how messy it was. All he knew for a long time was that sometimes his parents shouted a lot, and then some people came around to talk to them both, and then his mother hugged him once and left without looking back. After that, it was just Gwyn and Grigor. He relied on his father heavily, watching him and doing his best to pick up everything he could from the man. It helped that Grigor was a very attentive father. He may not have been a good husband, but Gwyn never felt unloved for a second.

Even when Gwyn made the decision not to immediately join his father’s trade, that love didn’t diminish. No matter how hard he tried, Gwyn just didn’t quite have the head for a merchant’s life. But Grigor sent him out into the world with more than enough skills to survive. Besides the basics of running a business, Gwyn was well-trained in combat, and he found that much more fulfilling. People don’t tend to make fun of you for misspelling something when you can cut them in half. He took that talent and turned it into a successful career as a sellsword, hiring himself out to anyone who needed some extra muscle.

Over time, he built up a reputation for being hard-working and honest, if a bit gruff, and his clientele grew to include other merchants and even some nobles. As long as the price was good, what he was asked to do didn’t much matter to him. This line of work has brought him into contact with a number of people over the years, including bounty hunters like Willow Goldenridge. (The number of times they’ve crossed paths and ended up getting in each others’ ways is a little ridiculous, and Gwyn now sighs heavily whenever he sees her. It’s a reflex.) Of course, he would always pop home whenever possible, and even lend his dad a hand free of charge when he could.

Ezia has been through a lot in recent years. The Doom, for one thing—Gwyn now has golden eyes and can turn into a fire-breathing dragon. So that’s different. The Divines getting slaughtered, that changed things, too. People have needed a lot more hired protection now that the don’t believe there’s any gods watching over them. And now, Hilak is apparently invading other places since their king died. It’s getting dicey out there, so when Gwyn heard his father was heading back to Arella and their remaining family, he decided to go with him. He doesn’t know much about the Ozerin family, but Arella seems like a safer place to be right now. Plus, who knows? Maybe he’ll land a good gig or two while he’s there.

WANTED CONNECTIONS

Fellow sellswords and mercenaries — Gwyn’s been around, traveled a bit, seen some interesting places, met some interesting people. He’s got connections throughout the world of swords-for-hire, friends and rivals alike, and it’d be fun to see him reconnect with some of them.

Anyone who needs his services — if you need someone to swing a sword for you and you’ve got money, Gwyn’s your man. He’s up for a lot of things, even if it’s just clearing your cellar of rats. He doesn’t fuck with assassinations unless the price is very good, and he’s not a thief himself. But he has run interference and lookout for break-ins as many times as he’s run protection against burglary, so a little bit of crime isn’t out of the question.