#and Ludwig's stupid rambling

[guillottiine]

i was bored and found this stupid ship chart and i knew what i had to do

[amyjustcos]

[the-laughing-lunatic]

uhhhchhdhfhdhd can you maybe do something with the mercs (all 9 if thats cool, but if not then just sniper and medic!!) with a reader that cant sleep so they just. go to their room and ask if they can cuddle with them

(ofc! This was rlly fun to write, I’ll prolly write for all of them later if yall are interested enough :> thx for requesting!)

Medic and Sniper with a reader asking for cuddles (PLATONIC OR ROMANTIC)

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ─── 

☆Sniper☆

He’s a tad confused when you show up to his camper van

I mean, he’d never turn down cuddling you, that’d be bloody stupid of him

“Why you wanna cuddle with me though, mate? I don’t exactly got the most comfortable sleepin’ conditions.”

“Because it’s you, Mick. If you don’t want to, that's fine.”

“Woah, woah, mate you’re twisting my words. I mean, I’d love that. Uh, come in I guess.”

Bro is so awkward omg- 

Does not know how to initiate physical contact at all so he just kind of stands until you lay down on the bed

The bed in his van is already really small so it forces you two to be even closer

He doesn’t really like being super close, but he likes to have an arm around you to have that connection

Kind of guy that needs noise to sleep, he’d be perfectly content to listen to you ramble about anything as he holds you.

Very light sleeper, def gets up in the middle of the night a few times but he’d be very careful not to disturb your sleep

He really does enjoy holding you and would like to do it more, but will absolutely not unless you ask first

In the morning he’ll fix you coffee and fairy bread to be polite

Really wants to do that again but will absolutely not ask you, way too awkward for that

☆Medic☆

You had gone to Medic’s bedroom to ask him if you two could cuddle…but he wasn’t there

You went to his lab next, where he sat hunched over his desk, frantically scribbling away on some papers. “Ohoho! Hello mein fruend, I didn’t notice you. What do you need?”

“I can’t sleep, can we cuddle?”

“If you wish, you may sit here while I work.”

You’d sit in his lap as he continued to write something or other, with one of his arms wrapped around your waist

It was nice for a bit, he’s big and warm, but it was too uncomfortable to actually try to sleep and you were tired

“Mm, Ludwig, when do you actually go to bed?”

“Ahehe, I think around one or two,” he said sheepishly.

“You think?”

“I normally just pass out at my desk.”

“...okay, we’re going to bed now,” you said, getting off his lap and dragging him to his bed

He’d (begrudgingly) come along after a lot of complaining about how he needed to get the work done

He likes having you lay on top of him, it calms him down to feel the weight of you (he def has a weighted blanket on the rare nights he sleeps in his bed)

Traces your skin and absentmindedly talks about where each of your organs are underneath 

He falls asleep very quickly, you have to take his glasses off and place them on the nightstand (mf wears glasses while he sleeps, they’re crooked as hell)

His grip is so tight even as he sleeps though, you wanna move? Ain’t gonna happen anytime soon.

In the morning bro is always awake before you, no matter how early you get up 

If he’s feeling quirky maybe you’ll get breakfast in bed

(He may put caffeine in your food at dinner so you wont be able to sleep and you’ll cuddle him, until you catch him–)

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

[scoutsbabygirl]

Okay, absolutely obsessed with your writing, I am holding your work so gently rn, I love it so much plz.

That being said, I am so fucking feral for the idea of yandere reader and Sniper. Like when I read that??? Went crazy. Took her to my pent house and quite frankly, I freaked it.

What if reader kept persisting, collecting things he leaves behind, throws away, fucking watches him all the time. The works, y'know?

ok, so i didn't do bullet points i kinda ended up rambling. hope i filled ur request anyways!

i just know the mundy knows that you have a keen interest in him and LOVES playing hard to get. he loves knowing that he pisses you off because he acts dumb- he's a very smart and clever man. a force not to be reckoned with. not a man you want to start a war with. he knows his facade of acting stupid gives you hope for the future but he's already 15 and a half steps ahead of you.

he's crazy too. if you're showing interest in him, he's reciprocating the same thing back. he would never be as upfront and forward but he offers to watch the stars with you after everyone on base has fallen asleep, he shows you all of his special weapons, once he lets you in the van everything changes in your head. the cogs turn and you take this as a sign, a step. mundy was so secretive and closed off, so therefore, why you were you allowed in here out of all of the mercs?

he's very impressed with your skills once you manage to shoot raccoon, a squirrel and other pests on base with his scope. seeing you rush out to his rabbit traps, holding the little bunny by the legs like....a sack of potatoes. it was interesting to him that you're weren't disturbed by preying on innocent animals. once time, pyro had a complete freakout and almost burned mundy alive (thank god for supportive stepfather dell). a change was much needed from his teammates.

one night, after mundy had given you a scope of his to practice with on ceasefire days you decided to use it to spy on him. you were horrified to see a similar gold plated scope pointed right back at you. from a distance, mundy was spying on you as well! lets just say, the next few following days were very awkward and uncomfortable between the two of you.

he has a smoking habit that he picks up on and off- he's lucky that he can kick it so easily but he's cursed that he can pick it right back up again. cigarette butts litter the ground of the upward base (please don't let pyro try to eat them) which inspires you to start collecting them. the idea is to trace his DNA with medic to replicate a clone of mundy. ludwig is a scientist, baboon uteruses' and ubercharges? surely this psycho can duplicate another living human being.

with a plastic bag, a pair of tweezers and blue gloves covering your hands you're caught by spy right in the act.

"why would you ever do such a thing?" the familar french accent purred from behind you. you could tell just by his voice that his eyebrow was cocked in curiosity. you snapped your head around, placing the cigarette into the bag.

"mind your buisness, frog." you snapped, zipping the bag up and walking away. spy took offense to this, not only because of the slur but you and him were on good terms. everyone pissed him off but you had managed to not make him as annoyed. and you gave him son the time of day, unlike most of his other love interests.

mundy has a close eye on you at all time but he likes playing stupid. he likes overhearing you talk fondly about him, watching your eyes from a distance knowing your brain is running miles of thoughts about him, especially when your eyes gaze down to his lips when he's talking.

[emotionally-inept-medics]

A knock was heard on the office door of Dr. Ludwig’s office. It was late in the evening, Dell had wanted to avoid the bustling activity of the base during the day. That, and plagued with his night terrors, he couldn’t sleep, and hoped that the doc was a night owl like him.

Besides, Dell needed to branch out more, talk to some folks he hadn’t seen in the past.

( @emotionally-enervated-conagher )

Ludwig flinched unconsciously, swiveling his chair to turn the door, crossing one leg over the other and hurriedly finishing up a sheet of paperwork with a deflated sigh.

"Ah, ja? It is open!" He said a little loudly, adjusting his glasses, expecting either Soldier, Anne, Tavish or all of the above, preparing himself for drunken ramblings or stupid injuries.

[sugarwithsarcasm]

Ludwig never really considered himself socially inept, sure, but this, this was just embarrassing. He knows he should be more focused on when did Feliciano consider themselves a married couple, but right now, he's arguing with Feliciano about cars.    And he kind of doesn't hate that.

---

“Ludwig, can I ask you something?” Feliciano sipped his espresso, smiling at Ludwig who hummed as he reviewed hastily typed work documents Alfred had sent him at 2 am. 

“I’m not lending you any more money.” Ludwig deadpanned, his eyes never leaving the astonishing amount of grammatical errors written in comic sans on his computer.  

Feliciano laughed, shaking his head. Ludwig shifted to look over at the bubbly Italian briefly, smiling to himself as Feliciano calmed down.

“Let’s do something stupid.” Ludwig sighed, powering off his computer. “Something dumb and mortal and fun and not work related-“ 

“Feliciano get to the point! We don’t have all day, we both have better things to do then listen to you ramble.” Ludwig side-eyed Feliciano, who giggled and took a bite out of his pastry.   

“Let’s go on a date!” Ludwig’s face turned a bright red as Feliciano rambled on. “We can both get all dressed up and I can pick you up and we can go to a fancy dinner and get gelato and then maybe walk around a garden or something with some coffee and then we can go to this lovely little bakery-“ 

“A date? Like a romantic kind?” Ludwig’s mouth went dry as he struggled to make up a coherent sentence. “ALSO WHY DO ALL YOUR DATES INVOLVE FOOD?”

“Yes, like a romantic kind! Luddy, I didn’t think I’d have to explain this all to you, really,” Feliciano paused, “I really should start listening to your brother but it’s just so much fun to disassociate whenever I see him!” 

Ludwig tried to ignore the butterflies that were violently attacking his stomach as he looked at Feliciano’s smile. “What makes you think we should go on a date romantically? Are our nations requiring an alliance? Did I miss an email-“ 

“LUDDY NO!” Feliciano reached over the table and smacked Ludwig who had been reaching for his phone. “I mean it in a romantic way! Not! Because! Of! Work!” Feliciano took one last bite out of his pastry and a swig of his espresso as Ludwig stared at him in confusion. “Plus, come on! We’re practically a married couple at this point!” 

Ludwig clutched his chest as he felt himself have his third heart attack of the day. “WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?” 

“Oh come on!” Feliciano threw his hands up dramatically. “We are having breakfast together for the third time this week! I made you coffee! I’m literally petting your dog in your pajamas! We slept in the same bed last night!”  

“You broke into my house! If I could, I would have you banned from the entire nation of Germany centuries ago!” Ludwig swatted Feliciano with a nearby notepad, causing the bubbly man to squeak, muttering apologies in rapid (incomprehensible) Italian. Ludwig’s German shepard Aster, let out a soft yelp as Feliciano took his hands off his silky, shedding fur. 

Felicino vigorously shook his head, his auburn bedhead hair flopping around his head like his arms had when Ludwig had first tried to introduce him to weights years ago, a childish pout gracing his soft, tan face. Just as Ludwig began to apologize for being rude (Just as Ivan’s therapist had told Ivan to do, and Ivan had eagerly told just about every other nation in the Northern Hemisphere.), Feliciano began to shake his head and laugh.   

“Oh Ludwig,” he started, his laugh dying down into a soft smile, “you don’t mean that. You know you,” Ludwig watched Feliciano bite his bottom lip and fiddle with his hands that were now both placed in his lap,“you know you like me!”  

“No I do not.” 

“Yes you do.” Feliciano hummed as he got out of his chair, taking his dishes to the sink. Aster lay down at Feliciano’s feet as water began to flow from the faucet as Feliciano washed his dishes singing, “Luddy’s got it bad for me, Luddy’s got a crush on me”, to himself. 

Ludwig paused for a moment and smiled as he watched Feliciano dance and sing to himself as he washed the dishes, the sunlight streaming through the sheer, gaudy floral curtains Feliciano forced Ludwig to put up. He found himself standing up and taking a few steps over to Feliciano who stopped singing and dancing, looking over at Ludwig with a kind of teasing confusion, a daring look in his eye unique to Feliciano. 

Well, Ludwig reasoned to himself, maybe he did feel a little less lonely, a little less hopeless when he was with Feliciano. Maybe he slept a little better near him and wouldn’t push Feliciano off of him immediately when he would find the smaller man clinging to Ludwig and nuzzling into his chest. “Maybe if I have a few hours of undisturbed work ,” he swatted Feliciano’s mischievous smirk with the back of his hand, hiding a playful smile, “then we can have dinner at home and, um-” 

“kiss!” Feliciano dramatically cradled his cheeks in his hands making a kissy face while closing his eyes. 

“NO!” Ludwig yelled, his face burning and his voice cracking. He muttered indignantly to himself and attempted to regain control over Feliciano’s hysterical laughter, “I WILL NOT HESITATE TO STOP EXPORTING YOU YOUR STUPID LITTLE ITALIAN GERMAN CARS.”  

Feli gasped before grabbing a clean, metal spoon and shaking it in Ludwig’s face, “NO PLEASE NO, LUDWIG THAT'S OUR CHILDREN YOU CAN’T-” 

“IT'S A BUNCH OF CARS FELICIANO, ALL IT IS IS A METAL AND ENGINE AND-” 

“YEAH WELL HOW DO AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT YOUR NOT A TOTAL HUNK OF METAL AND I’M ACTUALLY AN ENGINE-” 

Against his better judgment, Ludwig let out a warm laugh, Feliciano quickly joining him in laughter. They stood for a few quiet moments, stupidly laughing together, smiling together, happy together. 

“Feliciano?” 

“Yeah Luddy?” 

His heart skipped a beat, “Make dinner tonight, we’ll clean the kitchen together and walk the dogs in the evening.” 

Feliciano’s eyes lit up, “Can we watch a movie together afterwards?” 

Ludwig smiled, “Deal.”

[thebrightestlodge]

@nishihii Saw your tags (thank you SO much for the commentary!)

I have ....MANY DISJOINTED THOUGHTS on them ...considering there is absolutely nothing beyond Amelia's cutscene and suggestions based on Henriett's locations. I am going to be nice and put it under a read more so apologies for rambling. I'm the person who made that one flayed BSB in Old Yharnam my own OC at this point.

Thots on "Violently Ill and Tragically Catholic" and "Emotionally Distant Through Distrust of Anyone That's Not Her Person" (this jsut rambles into a chunk and I apologize as I realize this right after sdfgfgdg)

I mean, Amelia has three details, she's a Vicar left behind, she's clutching a pendant in the Grand Cathedral, and she's bowed and praying in front of Laurence's Skull. That's ...about it. So a lot of this is jsut my brain going "This is my interpretation to the point of 'my city now' "

Unknown what sort of special thing Amelia has to her, maybe it's a secret that never spreads to anyone beyond the upper echelons of the church, but she is chosen and groomed to serve as a high ranking member of the church. Sickly and paranoid and seemingly on the edge of a breakdown constantly, thinking gods are judging every move. Her illness came before the church, and people jsut deal with it coldly, but she's used ot it at this point. Not to say she is inept or withheld, she definitely has earned a place, her faith and her intelligence holding her up to the title of Vicar. She comes into the title in her early 20s, I like to imagine after the Halmet, so she knew Laurence before and after the descent to madness. Not any relation but she's being set up to take over whenever Laurence steps down/is indisposed/goes crazy goes stupid, so there's a decent connection. A soft intelligent man who wants to help slowly getting more frenzied and wild discovering what lays beyond blood and fluid, and the part unattached to the church wants her to leave, but her faith shackles her. As Vicars begin to disappear and beasts fill their halls, Amelia is slowly becoming more panicked and paranoid of her eventual hour of beasthood. Constantly check her mirrors and asking others to see if her pupils have started blistering, if her blood is now different, if the smoke is driving her away more than usual. She's never left the Ward so knows nothing of the world beyond who comes to prayers and what Henriett tells her as Amelia settles into another dreamless sleep ...

Henriett has even LESS lore, but a couple things I find interesting. She's the main and ONLY summon for Amelia, but she is an optional boss for Ludwig (and I've heard Laurence but can't get info for this bit). She also wields a Kirkhammer, a known church weapon, a repeating pistol, and torch

With the Ludwig and Kirkhammer, I always imagine Henriett as a former Tomb Prospecter, (the only other prospector we meet is Olek, who also uses the Kirkhammer, repeating pistol, and torch). She for some reason decides to cease descending into the dungeons, even if the great Church Hunter Ludwig insists on invites, seeing her as skilled at what she does. With her being a Church Beast summon, perhaps she's like Djura and discovers the true secrets of the church, and decides not to be involved in their schemes. The Hunters have no secrets, they're jsut former gilded heretics who wander in the honesty of their brutality. Somehow she's formed this very very close connection to the Vicar Amelia. For some reason, she sees it as her task to tend to Amelia, making sure she's comfortable and cared for, and able to handle herself when Henriett is not around. Perhaps her secret knowledge of the blood means she knows why Amelia fears beasthood. She and her friend have their contingency plan. It is spoken of as intimately as one shares a secret to a lover, but no one quite knows their association with one another, no one can tell if this is an inappropriate church connection.

-----------

Amelia is alone when we fight her Henriett only a few blocks away. Perhaps she wants her last human memory to be when she and Henriett were close, and not her seeing claws grow from her finger beds and her friend swinging stone to break her apart. She asks Henriett to leave and only come back when the blood breaks. Henriett thinks much the same. The new Hunter invites her to duel with a beast in the Cathedral, the floors are cold and cruel and Henriett remembers when she used to warn Amelia about walking across them barefoot and catching an illness.

Ludwig is an afterthought. A man she respected, she's here to give him the dignity he deserves. She wants him to see what a church hunter has become, someone who can carry a task for others. She performs it well and even if he sees the Hunter isn't part of them, she is the one to tell him (be it truth or lie) that his dear spartans have always fought for their honour. She doesn't know The Harrowed but she respects him enough to leave him with the beast's head

(if the Laurence summon is true (I've never found her summon)), She's there for her own fury. Her closest confidante, the closest she's ever been to a person. She had to kill her with the kindest mercy one can bestow on a Hunt. Laurence birthed monsters, Laurence made her friend a slave to a cult born from amniotic anguish of an underworld. Henriett's kindness is going to make this murder as cruel as she feels it needs to be. She finds a bed in the Hunter Gaol afterwards and takes the first rest she has in years. When Henriett wakes up, she'll decide to bury Amelia's amulet in the Upper Ward.

[wrestlezaynia]

"Oui."

Ludwig makes a hasty retreat, nearly bumping into Sami in the process. "Control your husband." He sneers derisively.

"My husband?" Sami thought to himself. He had to admit, it has a nice ring to it as he approaches the locker room with caution. "Kev?" He calls out to him, peeking his head inside. The next thing he knew, he's being dragged unceremoniously into the room by his shirt collar.

A seething Kevin stands before him huffing and puffing. "Where've you been?" He asks, pacing back and forth like a caged animal. "First Baldy shows up, then Slenderman, I can't take it!" He exclaims, his shrill voice echoing off of the paper thin walls.

"Kev, calm down." Sami soothes, inching closer. "Remember what Dr. Shelby taught you, breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth." He gently reminds him, giving a demonstration.

Kevin scoffs incredulously. "Dr. Shelby's a quack, that crap doesn't work!" His voice rising in volume. "Breathing exercises are stupid anyway! Like taking a deep breath is really going to help the situation, why don't I just-" His sentence abruptly cut short by a pair of soft lips.

Growing weary of Kevin's rambling, Sami decides to take a different approach and brushes his lips against Kevin's to silence him. A hush falls over the room, the only sound that could be heard is the gentle thumping of their hearts beating in unison.

Once the initial shock wears off, Kevin returns the kiss with fervor. His woes a distant memory and Sami's lips are the cure.

The kiss breaks, leaving both men gasping for air. Sami leans down to rest his forehead against Kevin's, their eyes meeting in a steady gaze. "Feel better?" Sami asks softly, smirking at his dazed expression.

Kevin nods in response, struggling to find the words. "Oui." He replies breathlessly.

[colon-tf-colon]

hey little gay people in my phone.

happy fucking pride.

ive never really explored my sexuality or anything. mostly, because i dont need to. i have the most fantastic girlfriend (yippee thats u @loz-21 sorry to all you parasocialites who yearned for me to be single /j) but as some of u guys might remember i said i was a little questioning last year, when i got "exposed" by a burner on twitter, bc of my "partner" being like... idk stupid twitter shit

oh and fyi they thought my partner was @shmalex lol bc i kissed him on a train in a pic💀

i still dont know what the situation is with that and thats ok. if ur feeling the same way regarding your sexuality or "mcsr status" (sorry genuinely someone called pronouns "mcsr status" let me find the pic omg it was to rila my beloved)

if you feel that way, you're valid and ily. (but ludwig style "ily" yk)

ok ramble over happy pride mfs :)))

[sweetlikehoneystingslikeabee]

Howdy!! How about some platonic headcanons for TF2 Medic? I just really wanna hug him and infodump to him fr fr JENDJDHDHDHB :3

Platonic HCS w/ TF2 Medic

You're so valid! SO valid. If I wouldn't be afraid of their stupid bullshit resulting in an early death for me, I'd totally want them as a big family.

TW: Death, medical gore

Klaus (red)

Klaus plays around way too much for a man in charge of medical care. Making jokes as he handles organs, using his temporarily dead teammates like a sock puppet during surgery, replicating things like their teeth and then displaying them... it's all very morbid.

He'd probably let you do surgery under his guidance if you wanted! Think of it like bonding! He's sure Scout won't mind. And even if he did... eh.

Hopefully, you don't mind super unsanitary hugs with a lot of blood! If you encourage hugging, he will forget to change his clothing and greet you with a squish! Between him and Heavy, you'll be filthy and your back feels like a cracked glow stick. It's affection.

He doesn't always understand the info you're dumping on him, but he definitely listens with rapt attention... As long as you're prepared for his practically unhinged ramblings on medical procedures that absolutely should not be performed on people. Why he doesn't have a license, silly things like that. You'd give him a license, right? Right.

Sometimes as his friend, you might have to help find Archimedes. For whatever reason, Klaus's dove has this penchant for burying himself into patient's body cavities. It is what it is. Like his owner, the bird loves giving affection while he's still covered in viscera. You might as well start wearing scrubs whenever you're coming to visit your friend.

His other doves surround you on your shoulders when you come by. Not as tall as Heavy, but still a nice perch!

One way you notice his care for you is how he fusses about your health. You aren't like the team, you know. You won't just respawn if something bad were to happen. Better let him check you out if you're ever feeling poorly! That being said, wouldn't recommend it given his... alternative methods for fixing things, sometimes.

Ludwig (blu)

He doesn't take his work much more seriously than his red team counterpart. However, he seems to have this odd fascination with death and "true death." He's not suicidal or anything like that, just. Sometimes he'll wax poetic a little too often about how exciting it'll be when he finally reaches his end. He looks at you with affection that one day you might die and he can hold a ceremony.

He wouldn't let you do surgery per say, but he'd be down to let you assist and hand him tools as you tell him all about your hyperfixations. Spy might be on this table for hours, it's fine!

He's a little more mindful of the bloodstained hugs than Klaus. While he doesn't mind aseptic technique the way he should, he does recognize you could get sick if he doesn't change and he doesn't want that to happen to his little friend! If you got REALLY sick, he'd have to install that little respawn chip all of them have and it's not... pleasant.

Do you like reading? Does he have a collection of books for you! Old ones, some quite rare. If you ask where he found them, he just smiles. He's traveled the world, you know! He totally stole them.

Once the two of you are really close, he'll even let you help him give Archimedes his "bath" aka a little water spritzer hose that the dove likes to dance in. He still likes being pristine and clean outside of his owner's work, being a former wedding dove and all.

Archimedes bugs you for treats because he thinks you can convince Ludwig to hand over the goods. The other doves have started doing it, too. They all coo in unison when you enter the room.

[amyjustcos]

“Ooh Acab”

wrong!

[doueverwonder]

Stuff About Nyo!Ame Bc Yeah

This is super random and also Ella is not to be confused with Abigail (who is in The Bookseller & The Florist and belongs to @rosethreeart) but is my own interpretation. Some of this is mushy, some of this is serious, some of it is just random preference rambles.

Her name is Charlotte-Ann Elizabeth, when she was little she commonly went by Lottie-Ann; but now usually goes but Ella, a shortening of her middle name.

England still calls her Lottie-Ann and when they're in stupid arguments Lottie-Ann Beth.

(stupid as in like,,, best way to make a pb&j)

Ngl I love the idea of her getting so sick and tired of condescending nicknames/dirty jokes made towards her she just started doing it back.

Speaking of; though I do like thinking about many nations being women instead of men, if I write America as a woman, England, France, Spain, Portugal, Russia, Germany, Denmark, and Sweden all have to stay men. It's required.

At some point during WW2 got up on a table and just straight up walked across it to get everyone to pay attention to her.

She's generally a Lot More Done(TM) than Alfred

Didn't fight in either of the world wars BUT did somehow shoot Ludwig twice, I will not elaborate.

pulled the disguising herself as a man getup for the first few years of the revolution until Gilbert accidentally outed her and all of Congress went "There you are!!!" and made her stop fighting.

François once made a "are you on your period?" joke and promptly almost got himself kicked out of NATO

Matthieu accepts that he won't be able to stop Alfred and hangs back until he gets a call from Al asking for help.

Matthieu accepts that he won't be able to stop Ella and goes running after her anyways bc he knows she won't call him for help.

Is slightly more Work Smarter Not Harder than Al

But will also throw all her brute strength at something without a second thought bc fuck it

Generally more involved with government over military, though again don't think she can't fight. She can and will fight you and win.

[koopalings4life]

What kind of activities would the game koopalings do if they each meet their cartoon counterparts?

Ludwig would be amazed that the him from another world is EXACTLY like Iggy, and would then proceed to forcefully give Kooky a bath and brush his hair, all the while Kooky is screeching like a pterodactyl. Once Kooky calmed down, they’d both start working on their next plan to defeat Mario, combining Ludwig’s practical ideas with Kooky’s outlandish plans before whatever they built is destroyed by the others.

Lemmy and Iggy plus Hip and Hop? The only thing that could happen is the greatest prank war in history! Nobody would be safe, not even King Koop and Bowser! Of course, they’re more than willing to team up to pull a prank on Ludwig, Kooky, Wendy or Kootie Pie…It would just be unbridled chaos with a lot of practical jokes and vandalism, and they’d all probably end up in the infirmary one way or another.

Bully and Roy would obviously team up to bully their siblings (mostly Iggy and Lemmy-Hip and Hop) and attempt to bully Ludwig/Kooky but almost immediately feel the sting of their revenge. Later on, their tempers would run over and they’d end up fighting each other, and both of them end up in the infirmary with several bruises and a broken bone each.

For Kootie Pie and Wendy…shopping spree! Whatever chaos their brothers are causing, they want no part of it. They’ll both just steal their Dad’s credit card and tell one of the escorts to take them to the biggest mall in a 50-mile radius. They’ll spend the entire day trying on clothes and accessories, and will leave the mall with 1000s of coins worth of useless tat and a hundred new dresses.

Larry and Cheatsy would love each other (platonically). Those cunning little imps would immediately team up to steal stuff off their siblings, and they probably won’t even get caught very often! Then, Cheatsy would try something outlandish such as robbing a bank and they’d both get arrested and locked in their rooms. They’d have a blast, though!

Morton probably wouldn’t get along with Big Mouth too much in the talking department. Big Mouth’s tendency to ramble will almost certainly confuse and bore Morton. However, they’d both have a great time exploring their largely nonexistent culinary talents in the kitchen (without the chef’s permission, of course) and watching their sibling do stupid stuff. They’d probably set something on fire whilst ‘cooking’, though.

Basically, they’d cause absolute carnage and probably destroy half the castle, and somehow end up fighting Mario after Ludwig and Kooky’s plan sorta works, but everyone is in too much disarray to really help.

[exrocist]

tag game: 3 books, 3 movies, and 3 songs

that changed your life or you just love.

Tagged by @zhabk4, thank youuu U__U <333 I don't usually do these (though it always makes me happy to get tagged!) but I was like. nnrrghhh must talk about Earthsea. soo.

(lots of rambling below the cut little bit embarrassed!!!!)

Books:

The Farthest Shore by Ursula K. Le Guin ; Nothing I say about this book (this series!) can do it justice honestly everyone on the Earth should read Earthsea. like really really read it patiently and intensely and with a savor because you will never encounter reality so closely and clearly ever again. everything about it is real to me but this book particularly struck me just because. well. lebannen. a force undeniable. I didn't know I was capable of loving so deeply and profoundly until I knew him. he is the best. I love you Lebannen 💥💥💥 I love everything about these books honestly. immense grace aside that shit also inspired perhaps the most intense and creatively demanding period of my life & broke down a lot of the mental partitions that I had constructed around what my hands are capable of. And I am still really bobbing through the wake of even now. Hopefully more marvelous things to come. There is much more strength to be drawn from this place yet if I can stomach it. sighs.

Death with Interruptions by José Saramago ; My words are failing me here but like. Saramago's voice and style have become real fixtures for me. I need to read a Saramago at least once every few months or my life loses its musicality. This is where I started with him so it gets to be on the list but Cain is also a great one for many many many more reasons that would be toooo much talking. for me to post.

I feel like by law I have to put Plato's Republic here which like. honestly not the most philosophically valuable work or even my drug of choice these days but was a thirteen year old's first inquest into the field that would become his only scholastic passion. so ! (He didn't even know he would have to read it seven times during his undergrad 😭) but if we want another novel to put here maybe We Need to Talk about Kevin by Lionel Shriver (mostly because of one sequence but also Shriver's great at writing in the voice of wry & cerebral women whose sentimentality is kind of shielded by their overt insight it gives them real internal lushness).

Honorable mention also to Isaac Asimov's I, Robot and subsequent novels of Asimov's future chronology which are currently fucking me up beyond measure. My recommendation here is read I, Robot (Or The Complete Robot!) and maaaybe Caves of Steel (tightly written marvel with only forgivable weaknesses of unprobed psychologies) and then stop. Just don't keep going okay. I've also had um Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal by Christopher Moore still swimming around in my mind despite having finished it a good while ago.

Movies:

Uhhh I don't w.atch. errr. Movies I can think of that I've watched just at all of my own volition: Raw (2016). good experience but didn't move me hugely taboo-pushing which is awesome conceptually but not in the right ways for me idk. not a bad movie at all though definitely some kind of stupid elements at play as well.

Uhhhhhhhhh.

?????????

Songs

Spent Gladiator 2 - The Mountain Goats ; I know I know I'm sorry I'm so trite and pedestrian but like. song with a non-negligible influence on me NOT killing myself <3

Wait List - All Get Out ; song with a non-negligible influence on me actively killisdukydhkuhldfhuik

I/m Not Here [missing face] - The Twilight Sad ; idk is this even a song I could live without. could I have the strength to do anything if not for this five minute dronefest. they need to start creating standardized ritual/ecstatic behaviors for the tracks off this album.

Honorable mentions: San Fermin's The Woods (if you were to ask me about artists they would most definitely be very much up there... Mr. Ludwig-Leone's artistry has been cradling me for a very long time), Say Yes to Everything by We Cut Corners (best band ever ever ever!!!), Topography by Civilian, Dump Your Dreams by A.S. Fanning (i love music).

I did badly at this but I think I made up for not having any movies by talking so much elsewhere. ermmm.

Only tagging @twilitfossil (Jesse Pinkman voice) do it bitchhhhhh also @ataliaf but only if you want to n__n <3333

[greenamber197]

Can I punch him in the face instead?

[breitzbachbea]

Nobody is stopping me from making dumb as fuck AUs for my favourite silly franchise, sadly, no one cares either because it's the usual mix of OCs and Hetalia characters

Anyways, I should get my Van Helsing DVD and think about that again. It had Lovi as the Cardinal and Feli as Carl, with my bestest boy Franci as a much less brooding and much more open to bullshit Van Helsing.