#and I've met so many wonderful people through my self ship with them!!!

[fitzselfships]

One more thought before I attempt to go to bed. It makes me so happy that people seem to Really like plastiscene and support me and Zooble being together <:]

[strobichie]

just sae.

♡⸝⸝ summary: poor you decided to replay ddlc, but something seems wrong... why is monika sae?

little note: bachira is sayori, rin is natsuki, and isagi is yuri!!

your perspective:

i had recently gotten a new computer, there are so many things i still need to work with and customise to my liking.

so, to cure my boredom, i'm installing ddlc again and replaying it!

my favourite character is natsuki, i absolutely loved how adorable and relatable she just is. she reminded me of one of the kids i babysat.

after installing the win files i extracted them all and started the game up, as usual, i see the 4 dokis on the main screen on startup.

i entered my name of choice and started the game ---

wait, bachira??? FROM BLUE LOCK??

why was he sayori? not gonna lie, his sprites are really cute, but how..??

i re-checked the website i downloaded the game from but it displayed the 4 dokis there and there was nothing wrong..

huh, why am i being scared?

i should be grateful, honestly.

i've been blessed by the gods above!! for once i'm fucking lucky!

no way was i gonna pass up the opportunity to interact with my favourite anime characters especially since they somehow ended up in my favourite childhood game..!

i wonder who natsuki, yuri, and monika would be, though?

this is interesting! as i progress even more reading the dialogues and clicking on the chat box, after a few minutes of suffering i finally got to the literature club with bachira!

"seriously, a girl? way to be a killjoy." rin... RIN?!?!?!?!?!

OH MY GOD RIN IS SO HOT? HIS ATTRACTIVENESS SCALE WENT TO 100 TO 1000 SO QUICK!!

wait.. could that mean ---

ISAGI IS YURI!! YES!! MY FAVOURITES ALL IN ONE ROOM!!

i hope monika is kaiser or even better, anri..!!

gosh this got me feelin' so giddy and chipper in the early fucking morning..

i skipped a few of the dialogues, and abruptly stopped when a certain person came into view.

...sae? really?

what an eyesore. i hate sae, of all people, why sae?

sure he was similar to monika, but only in appearance. kaiser or anri could have been able to fulfill this role.

i sighed in annoyance, at least i have rin and the others...

i continuously skipped many dialogues and had finally gotten to the part where sayori, or in this situation bachira, hangs himself..

right, this was a horror game after all. did i really forget about the main plot?

i stared at the screen with an obvious frown. rin and isagi are next..

and the person behind all this was saeshit. ugh, seriously... well, good thing i can just delete his files at any given time.

progressing through the story even further, i got a special poem and cringed at the 'drawing'. it was bachira hanging in a humorous manner.

this was unfortunate.

i clicked on the chat box endlessly, wanting to speedrun to the moments of all my favourite characters deaths..

seeing rin crack his neck and isagi stab himself looking like a crazed maniac broke my heart. good things don't last.. this will probably be the last time i'll ever be able to play this version of the game.

then, here sae was, fuck was he smiling for?

"let me take a quick one of rin's cupcakes, these such are really good for a brother so shitty and nasty." i scoffed and gritted my teeth in anger, sae was clearly the asshole in their brother-ship.

i was met face-to-face with sae, i pursed my lips and stared at my computer screen.

"it's nice to talk to you even if it's by a dialogue box." is this even real?

"i know that you're thinking: is this legitimate? to answer your question, yes it is. i became self aware after everything in that god damn manga and anime called blue lock, i felt sick and tired of not being able to show up in the manga after a long period of time. somehow, i found a way to break the barrier between the fictional animanga world and reality as you call it." that was a mouthful. he was pretty talkative now. my burning hatred for sae cooled down a bit as he spoke more ---

"i found this 'cutesy romance horror' game and it had all the things i needed in order to cross over to the real world. this version of the game only exists on your desktop, {user}. is {user} even your name? are you even a girl?" he shot me a confused expression.

"honestly, i don't care anymore. even i started falling in love with you. i thought i wasn't capable of love, just like the original character monika, i fell in love with you." this sent a shiver down my spine, i sweat-dropped and continued reading his dialogues.

"you read that right, i love you. even if i'm not real, i love you. i won't ever let you leave me. i'll kill you even if you think of it." he coldly stated and i opened my file explorer, ready to delete his character file --- huh.. why couldn't i delete it?

"i'm disappointed, why would you wanna try to delete me? i love you, you should be grateful i love you." but i hated sae, i hate him!

"i've been practicing for a while, i think i can finally break the laws of physics and rules of nature between our worlds." uhm, does he even know what the fuck's he saying?

"i'll see you soon, goodbye {name}. i love you." HOW DID HE GET MY NAME? DID HE HACK INTO MY COMPUTER BECAUSE WHAT THE FUCK..?!?!?!

i was scared shitless, jesus christ, just what did he mean by all that? i force shut down my computer and rolled to my bed covering myself in my blankets. time to go back to sleep after that eventful experience.

short little fic, should i make a part two?

finally made a part 2!

[uncannyalien]

Asking some AU comp competitors & supporters:

- Are there any AUs you weren't familiar with that have recently caught your attention, or that you would like to learn more about?

- What are some AUs/fanworks that you enjoy, and would encourage more people to go check out? (Doesn't have to be in the comp!)

Oh Stars, where do I begin?

The server of the competition is full of so many creators, many of whom I have never met or known of their AUs before(I'm still quite new to the fandom), and it's been great engaging with all of them!

I can't list every single AU I wanna learn more about, there's too many!

I'm very intrigued by Aberration by probablynotarutabega whom I'm going up against in the coming bracket, and I literally spent some time today reading what they have available so I could get to know it better! I hope we're at least able to team up!

There's also the Revelations Timeline AU by idk im just here now who has a really cool insight into how the Krang and the magic system works in their AU! I'd like to say we've become friends over this little time

Of course I have to talk up some of my friends AUs!

Minecraft Isekaid by songdrop (who has teamed up with Mitosis by Varian_dislikes_cheese) is a really cool AU about the rise boys getting stuck in Minecraft but as they explore things are not quite how they know. They're incredibly talented at art and storytelling and have so many ideas it's absolutely insane!

There's also the Soulmates(Evil) AU by Evan that's heavy Mikey angst and it's wonderful to see the other characters beating up MeatSweats

Oh dear this is gonna be long isn't it ehe. There's just too many to count!

The Employees is done by multiple folks and follows a collective of OCs that work for Senior Hueso

Minor Interference by bambiraptorx is on my To Read list where the turtles accept Draxum's offer of training with him

As for ones that are not in the competition I have many suggestions:

Clean up Crew also by songdrop, a small fic that's part of his like, 6 AUs in one universe the guy's an idea machine!

I discovered A Mirror's Reflection by ratsistryingtheirbest here on Tumblr as just a "what if" post and I may or may not have sort of dared them into making it. And it's really good! A rise Future AU where Leo, Mikey, and CJ are sent to another reality post-apocalypse where their brothers survived. And won the war.

The Nexus Heir by ItzCoffee is a fun AU where Leo gets manipulated into Big Mama's care

I'm not particularly one for fics that have romance/shipping or the Next Generation trope, but Little Warrior by NovelistServant is a proud exception for me. This is an AU where Future Raph gets sent back in time with a baby CJ and things sure do happen. Prepare to cry, prepare to laugh, prepare to cry again but happy this time. I've read it twice

A Tale of Spirits by unorthodoxx recently updated and I'm so excited with where the story is going. You like turtles? You like ATLA? You're gonna like this one

And last but certainly not least, I'd be remiss if I didn't shameless plug my own AU: Remember Forever. I've written plenty of stories before but this is my first fanfiction and it's the longest project I've had so far. It's a post-season 2 pre-movie rise AU where Mikey discovers an alien(that is definitely not my self-insert) and shenanigans ensue. You can of course learn more at my masterpost which is pinned on my blog and by giving it a read! I'm trying my best to write some fluff while also acknowledging that these characters have Gone Through Things.

There are so many more AUs than these that I've mentioned so seriously go check everyone out! Thanks so much for the ask and I wish everyone a great time in the competition!

[schmem14]

20 questions for fic writers!

Thanks for the tag @maesterchill! Read their answers HERE.

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

My stats tell me that I've written 50, but 5 are multi-chapter collections, so... a lot. Yeah.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

733,820. If you asked me three years ago if I could ever write that much I would've laughed in your face. Isn't growth amazing?

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Harry Potter (though I do read some Good Omens, Carry on Simon and Bagginshield stuff)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

UGH. I don't want to be honest here, since 2 of the five are Dramione fics I've now listed as ANON because of harassment reasons. I'll give you the NEXT five instead ;) 1. 93 Diagon Alley (Harry x George) They were roommates 2. HP Cocktober 2022 Collection (Multiple) Prompt fest 3. Solace (Harry x George) Unhealthy coping mechanisms (sex) 4. When Malfoy Met Granger... (Draco x Hermione) WHMS remake 5. Mistletoe, or Die F***ing (Harry x Fred x George) Self-explan.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes. I try to, because the BEST part of sharing is connecting with people who enjoy what I've done. Community, ya know?

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Mastermind (Draco x Hermione, Draco x Harry, Draco x Ron, Ron x Harry) The worst UHEA I've ever inflicted on y'all is this Dronarry fest 2023 story. Dark stalker Draco goes off the rails in the end. It's a masterpiece, I'm so proud of it.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

From Sunset to Star Rise (Harry x Ron) Cozy fall vibes, falling in love, little to no angst (Ron has a tiny bit of anxiety, that's all)

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Yes. Mainly the bigger ship ones (Dramione, looking at you) If you're wondering WHY I write rare pairs a lot, it's because rare pair fandom is a safe space with AWESOME people. We may be few in number, but WE GO HARD and LOVE HARDER.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

ALL KINDS (though I'm not great a fluffy smut). Check out my HP Kinktober Collection 2023 posting daily RIGHT NOW. It's very kinky and dark.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

The closest I've come to crossover is more like "inspired by a vibe." I wrote a Community (TV Series) inspired paintball fic here: All's Fair in Love & War & Paintball (multiple ships)

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

No, BUT I've had people post me on Goodreads. Read my thoughts on why this is bad fandom etiquette HERE

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I've had many requests, but no one has followed through yet.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No! But I'm interested in this concept, especially if the co-author is someone I vibe with.

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

STAWP. It's too hard a question! Lately, I'm obsessed with Dronarry, and any combination of those three. I also think I'm more in love with stories than ships. If it's an amazing story I end it with "OMG this is the BEST EVER" and I say it about a lot of ships.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I'm writing a multichap Drarry fic where Draco is a wandmaker, and it's falling in love fluff. I'm terrified to write them because I feel like I'll get torn to shreds because the Drarry fandom is too amazing for the likes of little old me. I'll just read Drarry and call it good, and MAYBE I'll get the courage to finish someday.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Ideas. I'm chockful of ideas. Also, I read a ton, so I think the more you read, the better you write.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Fluff. I HATE writing fluff. Why is it so hard?

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I don't typically do it because I'm monolingual and don't want to fuck it up. I don't mind when others do it

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Harry Potter!

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

How to Care for Your Monster Book: A Guide by Rubeus Hagrid  (Hagrid x Monster Book of Monsters) Y'aaaaaallll... I have no regrets about this fic. It's the only fic I've ever written that is perfect, I'll never top it, it's just so funny and weird (like me).

Tagging: @the-francakes @mugsdontlie @swoontodeath @vukovich @mintawasalreadytaken @peachpety @nv-md @lumosatnight and anyone else who wants to

[sunshinedobi]

bad buddy fandom getting-to-know-you meme

tagged by @hyeoni-comb (i'm so glad you enjoyed "worth the wait"! <3)

note: i consider “fanworks” to pretty much everything people create related to a fandom, including but not limited to meta/analysis/discussion, gifs, fanvids/edits/fancams, filk, fanart, fanfic, fan food, fan crafts, etc. please include this note with the meme unless you have a different definition!

name and whatever you want to share about yourself

hi hi! i'm sunny, an alleycat that occasionally leaves gifts on your front porch in the form of bbs fics ;~;

when did you watch bad buddy/join the fandom?

april 2022-ish! in terms of being more active in fandom, maybe summer of 2022?

favorite ship(s)

MY PATPRANNNNNN

favorite character(s)

Pat! :]

favorite episode(s)

you do not ask a mother who her favorite child is :(

favorite scene(s)

D: i--i don't know! all of them! (episode 5 kiss? staircase proposal? PAT SINGING SAME PAGE? I DON'T KNOW)

one thing you would change about the show if you could

i love the original series with all its imperfections, but LOL if you ask about our skyy 2 that's another can of worms...

what are your some of your favorite fanworks made by other people?

Rika's wlw!patpran fanart (I don't think she's on tumblr or twitter anymore?)

Ivy's (triplelovescore) "love too big for a love song"

Kayla's (@dimplesandfierceeyes) the LEGENDARY "Fine Line" universe

Miscellar's (@miscellar) "Pinocchio" that made me cry on a plane

Z's (@thechroniclesofz) healing "your love is your life"

Bea's (@pransobrave) heart melting "Beloved"

and many more!

(also not to be gooey on main, but the fact that i've met so many wonderful friends through bbs is something that makes me feel some kind of wonderful! :>)

(if you create fanworks) what are your favorite fanworks that you’ve made?

"heart in a cage" - my eldest daughter, my beloved sapphic!patpran fic ;~;

"sleepless in bangkok" - honestly written self-indulgently for myself, but glad to see that people enjoy it! although y'all really, really need to get some sleep and stop relating to patpran. they are NOT in a good headspace rn.

a song that makes you think of bbs (the ones in the show don’t count lol)

"Same Page" (womp womp, sunny is not creative)

"Ni Yao De Ai" by Penny Tai (my own fault for projecting this song onto sib!patpran lol)

"double take" by dhruv

idk anything else you want us to know?

I REALLY MISS PATPRAN

[inquisimer]

Oooh, 5, 8, 7, and 24 for the love your fandom asks! c:

thank you for the ask friend <3

spread some positivity with a "love your fandom" ask!

5. something you see in fics a lot and love

Multiple PCs!! I love when people write "all origins" fics, or double Hawke AUs, or have all the possible Inquisitors show up during DAI. Or when people bring potential PCs from previous games (that weren't actually the HoF or Hawke) and have them show up in later instances! I was just rereading a fic earlier where Cadash is a lyrium smuggler, Trevelyan is a Templar with the Inquisition, etc, an dI love that sort of thing.

7. your favorite tropes to read/write/draw

Oh man oh man oh man, I always struggle to identify "tropes" that I like to write 😂 I suppose canon divergence, is that a trope? I also like enemies/idiots to lovers and Not Actually Unrequited Love

8. you hope more people will come to appreciate ___ (a ship, a trope, an episode, etc)

Platonic ships!! Genfic my beloved 😭💖😭 romance is all well and good, but friendships and non-romantic relationships (my Sibling Bias™️, augh) are just so so so precious to me. Especially in games like DA where the world is constantly ending, what else do you have during the apocalypse besides the people around you? 🥺

24. how has fandom positively impacted your life?

In entirely immeasurable ways😭💖💖 Most of the people I count among my closest friends, I've met via the DA fandom in the past two years. They've supported me and hyped me and helped me face insecurities and self-directed negativity that I never thought I would get through. With them I've found acceptance and community and love that makes me want to crush the distance between us. Speaking of community, that's the other positive impact I've found in fandom! The DA community is alive and well and full of bright and brilliant people. I love the mutual hype, the crazy fan theories, the feeding frenzy that starts every time we get even a scrap of DA4 news. And writing exchanges! What a fun thing to participate in. At the time that I picked up DAI, we were mid-pandemic and I had just moved back home from college and socializing was either nonexistent for safety or hard to find. I'm a true introvert and often at peace with just my own company, but even for me it was a lonely and isolating time. The Tumblr and especially Discord communities I've found here have connected me to Other People more than I've felt since living in college dorms years ago. A lot of that is due to a friend I made by commenting on her fic on ao3 - without her as my guide, I probably would have been too scared to step into the communities that I love so dearly now, or even into the roles I play within those communities. I might not even be posting writing, which is insane! And our first conversation was about, like, the proper way to use hyphens when writing dialogue lol. Anyway the POINT of that is: find your guide! Comment on fics, reblog things with nice tags, reply to posts when you smile and think "wow that's cool" and say that! Accept the awkward first messages of friendship and you'll find a bridge to wonderful places within fandom. Community is what you make of it - if you never talk to anyone, they won't talk to you. But if you reach out and talk to people, in one form or another, there are so many positive, uplifting communities out there to join and enjoy <3 (sorry to proselytize, I just 😭😭 I love it here)

[erabundus]

@momijiba &&. said... i  know  i  have  been  saying  this  almost  once  a  week  but  your  reblogging  that  one  gifset  back  in  november  2022  is  what  got  me  into  the  genshin  rpc  and  i  don't  think  i  would  ever  have  gotten  to  meet  you,  runa,  spence,  gem,  saint,  ventium,  velvet  and  others.  i  am  so  incredibly  happy  with  having  such  an  amazing  friendship  with  you.  i'm  happy  that  i  get  to  write  with  you  and  talk  with  you  about  anything  and  everything.  you  are  a  place  of  comfort  and  where  i  won't  be  heavily  judged  on  silly  brain  moments. and  as  my  partner  in  kazuren  brain  rot  i  want  to  thank  you  for  helping  me  write  kazuha's  story  and  helping  me  develop  him  into  the  character  he  is  today.  i  enjoy  our  threads  very  much  and  it's  always  fun  to  see  what  ren  and  kazuha  are  up  to,  from  silliness  to  being  very  fluffy  and  domestic. i  never  have  written  a  ship  for  this  long  or  at  least  it  has  so  much  development  and  it  makes  me  smile  just  thinking  about  all  the  things  that  they  went  through. ANYWAY!!!  thank  you  avalon  for  being  my  friend,  rp  partner  and  just  being  an  amazing  human  being.  i'm  super  excited  for  us  to  meet  in  the  future  but  until  then  i'm  so  excited  to  hang  out  and  write  more  with  you~

i  still  think  it's  so  funny  how  we  ended  up  meeting  by  a  stroke  of  random  chance.  see:  me  reblogging  a  wanderer  gifset  as  a  reward  because  i  speedran  the  first  fungi  event  at  the  last  possible  second.  (  and  i  STILL  procrastinate  on  events  to  this  day!  )  roleplay  to  me  is  a  creative  outlet  as  much  as  it  is  a  social  one,  and  i've  met  so  many  of  my  closest  friends  through  this  hobby.  but  i've  never  clicked  with  anyone  as  much  as  i  clicked  with  you  —  and  i  know  i've  mentioned  that  before,  but  it  really  boggles  my  mind  how  almost  immediately  talking  to  you  felt  like  speaking  with  someone  i  had  known  for  a  long  time.  you're  such  a  kind  and  welcoming  person.  i  am  such  an  anxious,  shivering  chihuahua  with  a  social  battery  even  smaller  than  ren's  —  but  our  conversations  are  something  i  look  forward  to  very  much.  you  inspire  me  to  try  and  self-improve,  both  so  i  can  be  a  better  friend,  but  also  so  i  can  just  overall  be  the  best  self  i  possibly  can  when  we  do  finally  get  to  meet.

i  just  remember  on  my  birthday  i  couldn't  stop  talking  about  all  of  the  wonderful  things  you  did  for  me.  (  it  really  blew  me  away;  i  never  had  a  friend  go  out  of  their  way  like  that  before.  )  or  the  gifts  we  exchanged.  or  the  ask  you  sent  me  to  read  while  i  was  on  that  super  long  road  trip.  or  the  messages  while  i'm  at  work.  or  spending  new  years  together  in  genshin.  or  all  of  the  dozens  of  other  little  acts  of  kindness  you've  done  since  we  first  met.  you  go  so  so  far  out  of  your  way  for  the  people  you  care  about  and  i  think  anyone  would  be  super  fortunate  to  call  you  their  friend,  milla. 

also! i have to talk about kazuren!

i  absolutely  adore  them  so  much!  i've  been  writing  on  tumblr  for  a  very  long  time,  but  i've  never  had  the  opportunity  to  write  a  ship  with  this  much  development  and  enthusiasm  and  just  mutual  BRAINROT  behind  it!  i  love  exchanging  little  headcanons,  i  love  coming  up  with  new  plots,  i  love  that  they  have  their  own  pet  names  and  inside  jokes.  they  bring  me  so  much  serotonin,  and  i'm  looking  forward  to  what  we  get  to  write  with  them  in  2024!

[rena-mariefanfiction]

Ramble, Ramble (5/13)

So, while I was having my mini-vacation (read: brain ick), I tried to read fanfiction to unwind and I found two different Fanfiction Culture things that I wasn't aware existed! And that I'm kind of unsure how to process, like, "huh?"

This is just screaming into the void because I was told that venting is healthy. So *aggressively shrugs* you definitely don't have to read this. Lol.

1) Comment Drama

So, apparently some authors set a minimum comment count for each chapter, then refuse to release the next one until it's met. This is stuff that I heard about when I was on FF.Net, like a decade ago, but never saw in person. I thought it was an urban myth or a fanfiction Arthurian legend. But nope, it's a thing. And, concerningly, it's a thing in modern times.

I went back through my private bookmarks and wanted to read a darkfic to purge emotionally and found that it didn't exist anymore. Not because it'd been deleted, but because the author hid it in an unrevealed collection. Okay, odd, but happens all the time. At least it isn't permanently gone. So I went to the author's page and found that most of their library was gone. Okay, really odd.

All of their remaining works are marked "complete", which is alarming because they had several WIPs last I checked. I delved into the last chapter on one of the fics and found that there was some drama going on. Oh, so very much drama.

They'd apparently set a comment requirement on releasing the next chapter of one of their fics. And it was a pretty high number, from what I can gather. When one of the commenters pointed out that it felt like punishing regular readers to hold the chapter hostage, the author upped it to a MINIMUM of 100 comments. That's... wow.

Next. Level. Petty.

When even more people got upset, the author had a meltdown. They hid all of their completed works, marked all of their WIP stuff "complete", and will only email chapters to people who have commented before. The last chapter of the work in question was also stripped of all text, which was replaced with "Removed. Removed. Removed." They also implied that casual readers are essentially parasites living off of their goodwill. Like, what?

What's wild is that this author averaged about 30+ comments per chapter. That's so many! In what world is that not enough?!

I just... it rubbed me the wrong way, I guess. I felt like the author was ungrateful for what they had. The fandoms that they're in are very large and very active. Some fandoms predate the internet, are dying, or obscure; they get low traffic. There are writers on AO3 that write for tiny niches, with tens of views per chapter, and they never complain about it. Never.

This is all said with the self-awareness that I average a lot of comments for a new(ish) writer, BTW. I'm lucky enough to have quite a few vocal and outspoken people word-vomit (said lovingly) into my inbox every chapter. And it's nice. It's wonderful. It's gratifying. But I'd probably be doing the same thing even with no comments because I love writing my stories with all of my shriveled heart.

The bottom line is this: don't ever feel pressured to comment on my works. I enjoy them, and I try to respond to each and every one, but there should never be any requirement for readers to put themselves in an uncomfortable position while engaging in a hobby. That said, if you enjoy something, comments are ALWAYS appreciated even after years on seemingly abandoned projects. Every author on AO3 does a happy dance when they open their inbox.

Needless to say, my mind was blown from seeing all this. I had to stop and think about it for a hot minute.

:.:

2) Pro-Ship vs Anti-Ship

Purity culture strikes again! Not my beloved smutty fanfiction!

So, this is a thing? Apparently?! Are we seriously having this discussion in 2024? I didn't realize that this was quietly gaining traction until I saw something about it on Reddit.

From what I've gathered, there seems to be a spectrum - and please feel free to correct me if I'm wrong - between the two extremes of this debate. Pro-ship seems to be generally from a "I stan darkfics and only read them" to a "you can read/support whatever you want, no matter how problematic, because I don't have to support it personally". Don't Like, Don't Read, if you will. Anti-ship exists in a state of flux between "I don't support works that I personally consider problematic" and "I believe that we should completely censor works that I personally consider problematic".

There are certain types of fanfictions that I don't particularly care for, even as somebody with pretty wide-ranging tastes. But I make do. AO3 has these cool things called "filters" that I apply liberally.

Anyway...

There was an "Anti" in the comments section of a much-beloved fic going absolutely feral because there was an age gap between two characters of ten years. Never mind that the characters in question were 43 and 33. Lol. It was honestly trippy to read.

They straight up told the creator (it was an Orphan_Account work) to delete it because it was encouraging pedophilia. And when asked why by another commenter, they said, "because she would've been an adult when he turned 8". That's how math works. Congrats, you've discovered basic arithmetic. But they're consenting adults now, when they got together, so why should it matter? "One of them was a child once so this is pedophilia" is an interesting argument. I'm not sure I follow the logic, though.

Like, there are actual moral debates to be had about some of the stuff that exists on AO3, but this particular age gap is what sets you off? "Age gap" was clearly tagged, yet you clicked anyway. Okay, babes. Stay classy up there on your soapbox.

Are we having the morals debate over FICTION where mass censoring is brought up as a solution? That's intriguing. Cool. Not worrying at all.

For the record, I write "problematic" content sometimes. Oops. Sorry, not sorry.

[jiessicas]

07.13.23 - 07.16.23 japantown, poem & dance, & the circus, & more dance

07.16.23 (sun) afterglow; work hangout; missing sf art bookfair

 overslept and just listened to music from last night, which was very nice n leisurely

i was so worried this week but it was all good 😭😭 / grateful to live let live be alive 

marveling at the liveness of the last three days / how chronically late i am to everything

found the last piece of a lil puzzle and paced around in incredulity

went to j's to work on kernel mag, poems as machines, revisited

showed up to book fair after it closed ;-; an old coworker m recognized me from the back as he was crossing the street by my headphones, we talked about potentially moving to LA, their roommate search

met up with m who ran into c, who i met in passing at s's park hang a monthish ago; got coffee and then wine, a fun rotating seats convo about obsession, books, other things

took an uber home and the person driving said someone going to the grateful dead concert and left their phone in his car

exhausted but content; phone remains an object of obsession, swapped out twitter for instagram -- so content and so relieved to be done with some big things

himbo and baby are states of mind

grateful, feeling like i'm knitting myself together; series of miracles this week, feel like a more effective gatherer, calendarer; was late to it all, love arriving, hate leaving, saw so many friends in passing, feel turned inside out in a nice way

happy happy, feel relief coming home after being outside

body is happy humming, vibrating buzzing contently, wonder if i will look back on this and consider if i am being cruel in how much pleasure i have been having; i have felt more self-concerned than usual but also proud of what i got to do with/for others

thinking about what it is like to be the youngest child... ie what my sister who is the youngest of three feels like as the object of babying from parents... interesting to consider this a potential fantasy of an eldest child though its not one i've actively harbored

07.15.23 (sat) circus; dance & poetry; in the club before 11; machinedrum

a literal circus in the afternoon

a moment of gratitude for s & i sending me their art <3

toxic trait, being late to my own event; felt a shiver of delight in having friends (h, f, l, s, j!) come through

[so many incredible things that happened during the perforamnce]

cheeseboard; walking around berkeley at golden hour

got the sweetest clown prints from l :'')

yosemite fresh watermelons

sf symphony looks like a space ship

i love lil puzzles, turning things over idly, making peace with not having immediate answers

learning about writing groups, the little delight of realizing different artists i admire are connected with one another; of course; like the editor who told me years ago at a journalism conference in texas that people rise together in cohorts

in admiration of asian femmes who take on roles that are not easily afforded to them; noticing i have been misidentified as jasmine by so many white people,,,

dance is fascinating to me because of its wordlessness, conversely the dancers i'm working with wants to find mediums that make slightly more permanent what is otherwise an ephemeral thing

*play "in the club before 11 o'clock" - made it to the club early and got to people watch, which was very fun before moving on to catch machinedrum

got into a veryyyy nice sync with the music, which always gives the afterglow of a job well done (it felt like finding a rare gem of a show, the kind of night where it all feels so intuitive during the moment then bewildering after the fact; always fun to make my way back to that feeling, always happens in due time)

07.14.23 (fri) poem dejavu; rehearsal at the dojo; eug @ bpt

looked up a bunch of sleep poems; read a bunch of them to myself

i am calendar man; lil itinerary every weekend; every weekend a fest

now reading poetry submissions for kernel to narrow them down; did some pairings to share with jess

feeling thankful to be alive, looking back on march/april, which were so sweet. may/june/july; they were blurs; hanging out is the whole point / all i need is a place to sit in the sun, then the shade

"go be free young one"

spent a bit of time just reading poems on twitter ~

poem dejavu - lucille clifton & morgan harper hichols; marcelo hernandez castillo

practice / rehearsal w sarah bush at dojo; collecting the materials in a notes app; a poem in passing

hinges and tangents; the tangest that can only happen with unhinging; a poetics of unhinignig; a poetics of unraveling, surrendering, undoing,

morgan harper nichols - - - -

bar part time w eug; a bodega cat and watermelon juice after that

07.13.23 (th) japantown w k!

"forgive me i did not grow up with the trees"

wanna write about tumblr poetry; wanna discern between commitment and constraint; wanna scheme usb club; want to reply to texts x_x

sliced some nectarines; slurped some porridge

sat under the pagoda w k, then got lunch on the bridge; So Many Things talked about... [jk i have all these notes!]; a pigeon sat near us :)

some reflections on the talk;

pigeon clutch, dreaming about her

scrolling rabbitholes: amazon, wellfound

[fangirleaconmigo]

Hello! I saw a post that said you were rereading the witcher books. I've never read any of them, that's what I wanted to ask one thing. Is it true that after Geralt met Yen, he started to compare all the women he was with with her? I just saw how someone was talking about it, but I don't know if it's true 🤔 (sorry for my bad english)

Hi Nonny, first of all please never feel you have to apologize for “bad” English. Your English is great. And tbh people can even send me asks in their own language if they feel more comfortable. I will run that through a translator (if it’s not English or Spanish) and consult with friends, and then answer.

So. Your question is does Geralt compare all of the women he sleeps with to Yen after he meets her.

That answer is yes. Without a doubt. People can ship obviously anything they want in fanon (I do. Fanon is fun.) But in canon, Yennefer is the only woman he ever loves.

Yen and Geralt do break up and make up many times over the course of the eight book saga. In fact, most of their relationship takes place 'off the page'. Meaning, most of the time we spend with Geralt in the books, he is broken up with her. So Geralt does sleep with quite a few other people.

However, no matter who Geralt sleeps with, he is always thinking of Yen, and that is explicitly stated over and over again. You can’t miss it. I have pulled the most relevant quotes and passages from the books below to demonstrate that fact.

TW: I do refer to consent and sexual assault because it’s impossible to avoid in a conversation about Geralt of Rivia and sexual partners. But I do not go into detail or belabor the point.

The first time we see Geralt sleep with someone else after Yen is in Sword of Destiny, in the short story A Little Sacrifice.

ESSI DAVEN

Essi Daven is a beautiful 19yo bard. She is a dear friend of Dandelion's.

When Geralt approaches her, he notes that she smells like Verbena, and thinks to himself that:

…he liked the scent of verbena, although the scent of verbena was not the scent of lilac and gooseberry. Sword of Destiny p202

So, he cannot so much as smell an attractive woman without comparing her to Yen’s signature lilac and gooseberries.

Geralt thinks Essi is attractive, and he is extremely fond of her. He even impulsively kisses her when they first meet (though he regrets it).

He really regrets it when Essi falls in love with him. She is very very young (still a teenager!), so it is the first time she has ever been in love. She doesn’t have any experience with love, much less with the agony of unrequited love. She is confused, distressed, and distraught. She cries about her feelings of humiliation. Geralt is very uncomfortable.

Damnit, he thought, if Yennefer feels like I do now when she's with me, I feel sorry for her…I will never hate her again…never again.

Because perhaps Yennefer feels what I'm feeling now, feels a profound certainty that I ought to fulfill what it is impossibly to fulfill…Certainty that a little sacrifice isn't enough here; you'd have to sacrifice everything, that there'd still be no way of knowing if that would be enough.

No, I won't continue to hate Yennefer for not being able and not wanting to give me more than a little sacrifice. Now I know that a little sacrifice is a hell of a lot…

Sword of Destiny p231

He wonders whether this is how he made Yennefer feel during A Shard of Ice, which was the last time they were together when Yennefer broke up with him.

Also, Geralt feels guilty and thinks he should show Essi romantic affection (kiss/hug/sex) to make her feel less rejected. But he doesn’t want to. Perhaps, being 50 or 60 years her senior, he knows it could just make things worse for her. But the biggest issue is that plain and simple, he doesn't want to. Essi is not Yennefer.

Sword of Destiny -p233

He does eventually have sex with her, but based on the passages above, he doesn’t seem to want to. I could say a lot about consent, self worth, and Geralt of Rivia, but I couldn’t do it justice in this post. Honestly, Geralt and consent needs its own post because it is an important and sensitive topic. And since the purpose of this post is just to show that Geralt is always thinking of Yen, and I have done that, I’ll move on.

TRISS MERIGOLD

In Blood of Elves, and we learn that Geralt and Triss have had sex in the past.

So, here is Triss reminiscing on their affair in Blood of Elves p 61.

...she had seduced the witcher -- with the help of a little magic. She had hit on a propitious moment, a moment when he and Yennefer had scratched each other's eyes yet again and had abruptly parted. Geralt had needed warmth, and had wanted to forget.

According to Triss’s own internal monologue, she “hit on a propitious moment” and used the help of magic to seduce him.

So. We’re back at consent. (Sensing a theme?)

Fandom often debates whether this means she sexually assaulted him. Did she purposely wait until he was at his lowest? Or was that a coincidence? If she did wait and engineer that, it feels quite predatory.

And using magic to seduce someone sounds like rape. I’ve seen people argue that no, that is a drastic thing to jump to, that this could simply mean that she set the mood or made herself look better cosmetically. I have seen people argue that magic in that sense simply refers to the happy coincidence. I have my own very strong opinion, but again, these are sensitive issues that deserve their own post. If I get started this will become a novel.

For our purposes here, by Triss’s own reckoning, she was the aggressor. And now that she is at Kaer Morhen again, she tries again to seduce him. She fails.

He turns her down in the stables. He turns her down in the keep. And when they leave to take Ciri to Nenneke, she tries again, and he turns her down again. He says that she is important to him but that sex with her was a mistake. He makes it clear that while he cares about her, he is not in love with her and never has been.

FRINGILLA VIGO

In Lady of the Lake, Geralt has an affair with Fringilla. He and Yennefer are together romantically but separated physically and he erroneously thinks that Yennefer has betrayed him.

However, despite believing Yen has betrayed him, he repeatedly calls her name during sex with Fringilla.

Fringilla Vigo said nothing for some time. She didn't have the slightest intention of mentioning to the lodge that only in the last week the witcher had called her 'Yennefer' twice, and both at a moment when in every respect she was entitled to hear her own name."

Lady of the Lake p 106

LYTTA NEYD (CORAL)

In Season of Storms, Geralt sleeps with a sorceress for various reasons I won’t get into. He and Yen are on a break.

During their first conversation, Coral says that the sorceresses all gossip about him and Yen. She asks him why he loves Yen and no one else.

"...So, I ask you. Why Yennefer? Why her and no one else? Could you explain it? Name it?"

He refuses to talk about Yen with her. She brings up Yen again when they are in bed together. She doesn't like that he is asking her questions.

"You wouldn't dare doing anything like that if you were in bed with Yennefer."

Later, Geralt is with Dandelion, and his best friend warns him (unusually emphatically and forcefully) to steer clear of Coral, who obviously has ulterior motives. (Plot related that I won’t get into). He repeats what everyone knows. Geralt only loves Yen.

Then, after Geralt and Coral spend some time having an affair, the narrative reassures us that his time with Coral has done nothing to change his love for Yen.

Coral is helping Geralt to find his swords. So she casts a searching spell and asks him to think of his swords. The idea is, that his thoughts and the spell will cause the reflection of them to appear in a pool of water. However, when she casts the spell, he is thinking of Yen, and her face appears in the water.

"OFF THE PAGE" hook ups.

Other than those listed there are other people Geralt hooks up with, but it happens “off the page” or does not offer Geralt’s point of view or thoughts.

However, the narrative is consistent and repetitive in every situation where we do know Geralt’s thoughts. When we have his POV, no matter what woman he meets, he is only thinking of Yennefer.

So, given the relentless repetition of that fact in the story, there is really no other possible interpretation. Geralt only ever loves Yennefer. It’s canon!!

I hope that helps, anon! And I hope you enjoyed. xo

[shadowsinger11]

Inspiration

Pairing: Fred Weasley x Reader

Requested by anon: Could you do a Fred Weasley imagine where he falls in love with Harry’s younger sister. (Maybe a after the war where he lives)

Word Count: 3.3k (my hand slipped oops)

Genre: Fluff, childhood friends to lovers, mutual pining etc.

Warnings: Slight innuendo, Fred being cute and hot simultaneously

Tags: @self-ship-love @susceptible-but-siriusexual @hufflexpuff @neovannii @jenniweasley @elf-punk @heart-of-tempered-steel @itseatyourdamnapples

Message me if you'd like to be added!

Masterlist

Ottery St Catchpole, Devon, England, July 16, 2000

It was a chilly Sunday evening. The summer air buzzed with excitement and the tender aroma of magnolia as tiny white and pink petals were gracefully falling from the huge cherry trees, carried by the light breeze. Twilight painted the horizon in liquid gold and fiery red, soon followed by mellow shades of dark blue that brought countless sparkling stars.

It was getting the slightest bit colder, but it did not matter; nothing else mattered but the loud cheers and cheerful music, celebrating the official bond between a Potter and a Weasley under the wide night sky.

You couldn't have been happier for your older brother, Harry, who was currently dancing with Ginny, his now wife - now and for the rest of his, hopefully, but not really likely, peaceful life. For the longest time you've been wondering how he'd always manage to get into trouble even as a small First year with no experience in the wizarding world whatsoever. Or, perhaps, that was the exact reason as to why evil-battling and rule-breaking were such common practices when hanging out with him.

However, there was no fighting that day. There was no room for worry and fear when the entire Weasley family and their loved ones were gathered on the clearing in front of the Burrow, chatting, laughing, dancing, singing, drinking, celebrating and living for what seemed to be the first time since Lord Voldemort's fall. Danger was practically nonexistent in that blissful moment which was frozen in time, once having looked agonizingly distant and impossible to hope for. But that dream was no longer just a foolish fantasy to heal wounded hearts. It was there, and it was happening in the most beautiful way imaginable.

And suddenly, all those clichés of a married life weren't even clichés. They were simply humble wishes of people who had witnessed far too many horrors in such a short period of time, and only craved stability among the massive chaos. So when you glanced at Ginny, a twirling blur of flaming red hair and a gorgeous wedding dress, you didn't feel the need to comment on how banal the color white was. You genuinely smiled, admiring the pure, exuberant joy, visible in her eyes and scarlet cheeks. Harry looked just as, if not even happier than his wife, dancing in the ridiculous but wholehearted way that only he could, and old memories of him winning the golden egg, training Dumbledore's Army and kissing Ginny in the common room for the very first time flooded into your mind.

It had truly been a long time since you had seen Harry careless and free like that.

You yourself had spent an ungodly amount of hours preparing the yard for the ceremony all day; rearranging chairs, decorating, making sure everything was going by schedule, only to then dance your tired feet off, and though you wanted to continue having fun with Hermione, Luna and the rest of the girls waiting for you, you really needed a break. And a drink.

Excusing yourself to leave the particularly interesting conversation you were having with distant Weasley relatives, you slipped off your black flats that, despite looking absolutely stunning, hurt your feet terribly after an entire day of fussing over the color of napkins and flower bouquets. Barefoot on the grass, you walked over to a chair next to a table which seemed to have been occupied, but judging by the mostly empty glasses and plates, the guests weren't coming back anytime soon.

You tossed your shoes aside with a sigh and rushed to rub your aching toes, hissing from how sore they were.

How has Ginny been dancing like that for hours?

"Enjoying the party, I see?" a familiar deep, slightly husky voice commented, causing you to look up.

It was none other than Fred Weasley, dear friend from childhood, staring down at you, his ever-present charming smirk resting on features and hands shoved into the pockets of his dragonskin suit. But it was his flaming red hair that made your eyes widen - it was carefully smoothed back, shining under the moonlight like liquid iron.

Fred's eyes still contained their famous, loveable mischief, except now slightly tamer and calmer. His firm biceps had visibly grown in size, stretching out the fabric of his coat just a bit to give you a prominent silhouette that caught you off guard.

It had been two years; he had changed so much.

And you were afraid to admit you had too.

You blinked in surprise, processing his uncharacteristically sophisticated appearance before realizing what he had asked you.

"Would've enjoyed it far more if my legs weren't killing me," you groaned half-heartedly and leaned back on your chair. "What's with your hair?"

"What's with your feet?"

"I asked you first," you cut him off. "I bet Ginny is responsible for this."

"Actually…" Fred trailed off, and, whether on purpose or not, ran a hand through the ginger locks to keep them in place, unaware of how you suddenly wished the hand doing the graceful motion wasn't his. "Mum insisted that I looked my best. What can I say, it's not like George and I usually listen to her, but we thought we'd make an exception this time; our sister doesn't get married every day. But honestly, Ginny couldn't care less about how we looked as long we showed up."

"So like usual, you mean?" you giggled. "Showing up is an achievement for you even if you're underdressed?"

Fred beamed, pearly white smile complementing his formal outfit. You wondered if he used that exact smile to effortlessly allure costumers and business partners at work.

He rested an elbow on the table as he leaned forward.

"Come on now, darling. I know you find my messy hair irresistible either way."

His cockiness only caused you to laugh, though Fred was quick to spot the flash of nervousness in your eyes; it brought him immense pride to know he was the one to turn you from confident to adorably bashful and flustered in the matter of seconds.

He was looking at you intensely, expectantly waiting for you to deny his flirty accusation despite your shyness.

"Nah, Weasley. It only reminds me that even at twenty-two you still do not know how to use a comb."

Fred's eyebrows shot straight up to his hairline, mouth agape. For the first time, he actually needed a second to form a reply.

"Didn't see that coming, I give you that. Courageous one, you are."

Your heart fluttered with joy and you openly grinned, shrugging in half-hearted humbleness.

"Perhaps I am."

Speaking to him felt unusually energizing, as though you had jumped headfirst into a chilly lake. It was unfamiliar and it set your nerves on fire, causing your stomach to twist and turn with sensations that left you dizzy, but unbelievably thrilled. And you wanted more of it, you wanted more of him.

"Fancy a drink?" Fred offered, already pouring champagne into a glass before handing it to you, and you keenly took it.

"Thanks, I've been thirsty with all the preparations I was doing."

"Is that why your legs are killing you?"

"Exactly, I've been running around all day, making sure everything was in order… you know, a lot of organizing and the like."

"It must hurt quite a bit then," Fred commented with a pained grimace. "But I absolutely get you, Georgie and I are just like that when it comes to the shop. It's a lot of accounting if I'm being honest, though I admit he's way better at it. We need to be completely precise; we can't allow any mistakes."

"Woah," you laughed. "Control freak much?"

He wettened his lips, never breaking eye contact.

"Perhaps I am."

You tilted your head to the side, gaze piercing into his in hopes of finding out what those gorgeous brown eyes were hiding. The tiny playful flames in them were eloquent.

Shifting slightly in your seat, you smoothed out your bridesmaid dress and raised your glass, the ghost of a smirk playing on your lips.

"Cheers to us control freaks then."

Fred mirrored your smug expression and your glasses met with a clink. The bubbly liquid tingled your throat, undoubtedly refreshing you and cooling you off. You glanced at the people dancing in the centre of the clearing and giggled - Ginny had apparently thrown away her white shoes long ago, bare feet stepping elegantly on the grass.

"You see, I'd like to chat a bit more with you, but I'm afraid it's a bit too loud here. What about we go to the pond across the field?" Fred suggested, pointing at the woods behind his back. You had visited them countless times when staying with Harry at the Burrow during holidays years ago; the tall trees and the glistening waters had never ceased to bring you comfort.

The noise started to become bothersome, and you felt it even more necessary to continue your conversation somewhere private, the unknown causing butterflies to erupt in your stomach. Fred's presence could only be compared to a shot of whiskey, or the sensation of anticipating a tidal wave to crash into you in less than a second. It was wild and the tiniest bit terrifying, but oh so tempting as it pulled you in.

"I'd love that, but… you know," you grinned and playfully swang your sore feet. "Can't really walk."

But this didn't at all seem like a problem to Fred Weasley who only shrugged and stood up, "You don't have to. I'll carry you."

"Merlin, no! Please, it's not necessary."

Fred frowned, but his confused expression was soon replaced by an amused one.

"You said it yourself that your feet hurt like hell. And even if carrying you around isn't necessary, it doesn't mean I don't want to."

You attempted to tame the butterflies.

"No, no! You seriously don't have to, I promise," you frantically protested as you held up your hands in front of you to reassure him, but he only gave you a weird look. "I can walk on my own. I'll be too heavy for you."

"There's only one way to find out."

Fred walked over to you and leaned down, one hand sneaking around your waist and the other slipping under your knees. You shrieked in terror, arms flying to clutch at his shoulders, and heat rose to your cheeks from the abrupt contact. Your chests were pressed together, and you were afraid he'd be able to feel your racing heart. His skin was warmer than you had thought, and it successfully fought off the night summer chill.

"Are we going?" Fred whispered down at you, lips so close to yours that you recognized the nuance of champagne in his breath, mixing unbelievably well with the scent of cinnamon and sandalwood of his cologne.

Not only is he sinfully attractive, but he smells heavenly too?

"Yes," you breathed and let Fred effortlessly walk across the meadow with you in his arms. They brought this new, odd, yet familiar sense of security, and you allowed your head to rest against his chest, nervous gaze wandering off into the distance in hopes of not meeting his. Nevertheless, curiosity eventually took the best of you, and your eyes would occasionally flicker to his, which were now completely black under the night sky. They could swallow you whole, you swore.

Minutes later, you found yourselves in the company of old, enormous willows which surrounded the pond you so vividly remembered from your teenage years. You thanked Fred as he carefully let you down, and took a few steps forward to look around and drench in the misty moonlight that enveloped the area. The waters were crystal clear and completely still, reflecting the moon and its majestic silver glow. The bushes had grown significantly over the time you were away, and you fondly looked back at the moments when you would pick up colorful wildflowers in the summer before your fourth year.

"Shall we sit?" Fred asked quietly from right behind your shoulder, and you followed him with a nod. You found a comfortable spot on the fresh grass to sit, a few feet away from where the water met the soil and moved back and forth ever so slightly.

"It's more beautiful than I remember," you noted, lips curled up in a barely visible smile. Fred hummed in agreement.

"That's why I always make sure to come here every chance I get when I return. But, unfortunately, that's very rare in my case."

For a moment, there was only the chirping of crickets and the soft bubbling of water.

Fred turned to you.

"Remember when mum used to call for us to de-gnome the garden and we'd hide here? We could stay in the bushes for hours before we eventually came back," he recalled, seeming deep in thought. It was an extraordinary sight; for once the playful spark in his eyes was more mellow, there was no cockiness seeping into the way he was holding himself. He was just Fred, the man who was currently thinking with so much adoration and love about his childhood, the most significant memories of it being marked by you.

You wondered, given you ever had the chance to spend with Fred as much time as your older brother did, if the charismatic prankster would have fallen for you like you had done. You wondered, given the chance you had let Fred get to know you better all those summers ago, if his heart would have belonged to you by now just like yours did to him.

Had you possibly missed your chance?

"Oh, I do," you sighed, the tension in your chest vanishing as warm nostalgia crept in like an old friend. "I also remember when I got this really bad nightmare that night. I was so terrified that you took me on a ride with your broom in the middle of the night to cheer me up."

"That's true! My parents don't know about it to this day," he replied smugly. "I can still hear you screaming like a lunatic."

You jokingly smacked his arm, "I was twelve!"

Fred's grin grew wider.

"Excuses…"

This only caused you to stare at him in disbelief and cross your arms, managing your most serious expression, but Fred was aware you were on the verge of failing to keep your stern facade. He squinted his eyes as a teasing attempt to provoke you, smile threatening to split his face in two.

"Alright then, that's enough about me," you announced, and Fred nodded in mock agreement as he studied your playful pretence. "If you're so much better than me, Mr Darcy, what else do you do aside from stealing ladies away?"

"Stealing their hearts," he said confidently, flashing you a seductive smirk, reserved only for special girls back in your Hogwarts days. You giggled, finding his antic utterly ridiculous, but you hated to admit that it still turned your blood into liquid fire. Fred apparently saw right through you, because when your eyes landed on his, they appeared completely dark once again, but, you suspected, for a reason other than the lack of light.

Your throat went dry, and you found it hard to swallow down the lump that cut your breath short.

He ran a hand through his ginger hair as he began to explain, "I'm kidding, you know. But to answer your question, George and I have been working on this potion that should be able to change the color of the eyes and hair. Fun for those who enjoy experimenting with their appearance, but it can also be useful to the Ministry. They're actually going to send a team of a couple of aurors to visit us next month so we can update them on our progress and negotiate the details."

"Wow! That's certainly exciting!"

"Is it? I mean, it probably is, but I've been having second thoughts lately if I'm being honest." He scratched the back of his neck, and you realised you had only witnessed him being anxious when it came to his greatest passion. "I'm afraid we might not be done on time, there's still plenty left to improve."

You put a hand on his shoulder to get his attention, and said, "I'm sure you'll figure it all out eventually. Keep working as you normally do, try not to stress too much over the deadline, and even if things go wrong at some point, don't go too hard on yourself. It wouldn't take away any progress you've made so far."

Fred's body relaxed just a bit and he looked down at you. He couldn't deny the sense of serenity that he felt only when he was with you. Even as a careless young boy, he was able to pinpoint the way his midriff would clench every time you'd laugh at his jokes or ask him to play with you, without knowing what it all meant.

But now, as a grown man, he had a word to describe the bittersweet fire within.

"You know what?" He tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. "I could really benefit from having someone like you around to give me motivation."

"Motivation, huh?" you raised an eyebrow, fighting back a smile. Fred sneaked a hand around your waist and pulled you closer.

"Yes, motivation."

"Motivation for what?"

"Marketing strategies, work projects…" he shrugged nonchalantly, "...among other things."

You quickly caught on, suddenly becoming way too self-aware of the way you were practically cuddled into Fred's side, hand resting on his shoulder while his were wrapped around your waist. But his shining confidence seemed to rub off on you, because you asked.

"What's with you offering me a job all of a sudden?"

His bottom lip was tucked between his teeth as he took his sweet time devouring you with his darkened gaze. You didn't know whether you wanted to hide from it, or expose yourself even further to the way it burned its way straight to your core.

"Well…" Fred dragged out in his low, hoarse voice, and caressed your cheek with his thumb before slipping it under your chin to guide it towards his face. You could nearly taste the remaining flavour of champagne on his lips. "I've certainly been feeling…"

Fred went quiet as he got lost in the way you fit so perfectly in his arms; you had always meant to be there, he realised. His mouth crashed into yours, hands tightly gripping your waist, and you let out a gasp. Fred's lips were soft, although slightly chapped, and they moved gently but firmly against yours, turning you into their slave. Your palms naturally slid up his chest and he closed any remaining distance between your bodies by placing you to straddle his lap. The kiss was a dance of pushing forward and pulling back, two lovers having finally found their rhythm after years of living in fearful desire. You were positively drunk on his taste, on him, and you wished to never become sober.

When your need for air overcame the one for physical contact, you pulled away. Your chests were heaving with rapid, shallow breaths, hearts beating in synch like they had always done. You let a finger tenderly trace his cheekbone down to his jawline, then it came back up to draw different affectionate patterns on his face.

"What were you saying?" you asked, clearly out of breath. "How were you feeling?"

He fondly took your hand that was caressing his skin, and lifted it up to press feather-light kisses on your knuckles. His lips retraced their path until they reached the tips of your fingers, and he kissed those with the gentlest of touch.

You heart ached pleasurably from the way he was handling you with such care, much more than you ever believed he was capable of.

After minutes of worshipping you by the moonlit lake, Fred looked back at you as though you were his entire world. And replied with a smile.

"Inspired."

Reblogs and feedback are greatly appreciated!

Masterlist

[greenmegsnoham]

✨💕2022 Goals!!💕✨

Thank you @pennygalleon @corvuscrowned and @mystickitten42 for the tag! 😘

✨Reflection✨

Wow. What a year 2021 has been....insane.

I've appreciated being a part of this fandom more than you all could ever know.

I used to live where I could live my HP dreams in Orlando, FL, and although I don't regret moving back up north, I was in desperate need to re-connect with the stories I genuinely thank for the person I became. (but fuck jkr tho)

I started reading fic in September and writing in October of 2020, pushed out nearly 400k, birthed a podcast project with my best friend, and have worked tirelessly to build a community of love and acceptance in fandom that appeared severely lacking.

I've met so many amazing people and the love I feel here is just....ugh. I thank the Drarry community for being my gateway drug to far more content than I could even attempt to consume or create.

We all create and consume for our own reasons, and a huge part for me was to find my bliss in dark times, help myself through my depression and isolation. I've never felt so free and unapologetically me, and that wouldn't have been possible without all the beautiful members of fandom.

Thank you! 💕

✨Okay, yes. Goals.✨

💕No Fests, Except...

Being a part of various fests in this pat year has helped me grow as a writer, exposing myself to content and ships I never would have considered writing/reading and it's been an absolute joy. I'm so proud of everything I made. Especially [redacted] for HD Erised. I poured my entire soul into that work and it brought me just as much joy as exhaustion.

So! As much as I loved everything I made, I also need to acknowledge the stress that deadlines put on me and my personal wellness. Writing is something I am passionate about and my husband has always said "you're one of the few people I know that can make a hobby into a job."

He's right.

Fests = me putting my time and energy into something at the detriment of other wonderful experiences in life I've been missing because I "had to get it done".

IF I do any fests in 2022, it will be SELF-PROMPT and submitted if I have completed something appropriate within the timeframe.

Bottom line: Yes there are a million amazing fests happening all year long. It's so damn wonderful, but I have to know my limits and I need to get back and write for me at my own pace.

BUT! I have every intention of investing in the hp events/fest community regardless with events like @hpshipuary and @hpcestfest because, well. I want to! And, if I don't create anything for them, WHO CARES?! They are there for those who do!!

💕Which leads into...Fandom Advocacy...

Call me Helga Hufflepuff because I want everyone in fandom to feel seen, accepted, and loved and not judged base on what they consume or create.

I've been there for myself and I NEVER want anyone to feel like they don't 'fit' somewhere or that what they enjoy is wrong. You do not exist for someone else's approval. Find YOUR bliss and celebrate it. Don't give anyone the power to take what you love away from you, especially no-names on the internet. Like, bye.

If you want/need a space, @careofmagicalshippers has the space for you, growing into the space we all need and deserve: Join the Magical Shippers discord

💕Writing: for me, including original fiction

I had no idea I could love something as much as I love writing. I've always been a creative, with an Illustration BFA degree, but finding this however late in life has been one of the best things that has happened to me.

I have so many ideas for stories I haven't had the time to pursue (thank you fests 🤣) and WIPs that need love. I'm writing what I love on my terms and when I'm given that opportunity I know I'm at my best.

And as mentioned above, I often make hobbies into a job BUT I could see myself MAKING it a job. I want to keep writing and of course I will continue writing fanfiction. But the idea of becoming a published author for something entirely my own is so magical in itself. So, who knows!!!

💕Continue creating @careofmagicalshippers and @snapechatpodcast - with no end in sight.

What brings me more joy than writing and reading Harry Potter fanfiction and it's characters and ships? TALKING ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE IT!

Nathan and I have been having a blast with CoMS and we know you are too and that brings us so much joy. This world needs more love and laughs and we love to provide!

I also love that I can join friends like @snapecentric @danni-the-puff and @willwediejustalittle and others to share our Snapey love amongst ourselves and with others.

It's so much work but it is a labour of love that is worth it.

💕On a personal level...

I need to take better care of myself physically and mentally. There are several things over the years that I've let become lesser priority than they need to be. I need to take the time to recalibrate and find better balance in my life including relationships and health.

I need to be present with my husband and family.

I love the HP fandom and it isn't going anywhere. If I step away from my phone and discord or don't open Google Docs the world isn't going to burst into flames. In fact, by not doing so I create more fires than not. I acknowledge I've had a very selfish year - partly due to my manic depression and severe manic episode - and I need to remember my choices affect others.

Writing and interacting in fandom brings me so much joy, but it's okay for other things to bring me joy. I mean THEY SHOULD.

✨Here's to a Happier and Healthier 2022!✨

And remember...sticks and stones may break our bones, but words are just words. Don't give them more power than they deserve. 💕

Give power to the words that matter. Like how much I love you! 🥰

Pretty sure like everyone under the sun has been tagged already but oh well 🤣 @phenomenalasterisk @samunderthelights @avalonmoonshinesstuff @veelawings @oliverwilde105 @danni-the-puff @francis-sinbin @deaserkan @fuckboyregulus @screamingfae @rhiaflamesong @wheezykat @blue--dreaming @bronwenackeley @ronbinary @fw00shy @erlasart @quicksilvermaid @violetweasley19 @the-sinking-ship @mxmaneater @gnarf @swisstae

[starleska]

The sweeter than honey, King Candy for the ask game?

what a wonderful ask to receive, thank you so much anon 🥺💖 he really is sweeter than honey!! answers for this ask game about King Candy are under the cut 🔥

how i feel about this character: all of you who have been around for a while know that i am in love with King Candy 🥺💖 everything about him is so delightful!! his demeanour, his intelligence, and of course that violent sadistic streak that is so masterfully revealed throughout the course of Wreck It Ralph. he's equal parts smug and demented, a real narcissist who will stop at nothing to feed his own ego...it's just fascinating watching a character so absorbed by himself and his own power. no wonder he's Tumblr Sexyman 😳

honestly WiR is a great movie that i feel is made excellent by the layers which went into making King Candy such a badass villain. his goofiness underpinned by this latent sinister attitude becomes scarier the longer you watch, and it makes the payoff for his big reveal just perfect. let alone the fact that all three of his designs slap!!! those who worked on the movie mentioned that they designed King Candy to be kind of like a mob boss, and Alan Tudyk captured that perfectly in his Mad Hatter/Sopranos-esque voice take. i love his lisp, his manic giggles, his bouncy way of moving and especially his smile...aaaah i'm getting flustered just thinking about him 🥰🥰🥰

all the people i ship romantically with this character: this is a situation where i am a hardcore selfshipper, much like many King Candy fans 😉 power to those of you who do have canon ships with him, i think that's fabulous!! i'm just a little too invested in being romanced (or negged) by King Candy myself to give him up 😉

being a huge dork, a little while ago i developed a Sugar Rush OC for this very silly selfship concept...i've always loved the idea of a character who is a video game modder, someone who is deeply invested in old gaming lore and spends a lot of time hunting cartridges and arcade cabinets. my idea was to have a character in the human world who played on the Sugar Rush game with King Candy in it regularly, only to notice after he gets deleted. they post about King Candy online and are met only with bafflement and people who think they're lying about their experience.

eventually, they end up building their own emulator arcade cabinet, duplicating the data from the original Sugar Rush game and modding themselves into the game as a Sugar Rush Racer: this OC here, Strawberta Fizzbomb. there, they end up fixing the remnants of King Candy's data and speaking to him for the first time...you can imagine how delighted King Candy would be at the prospect of sharing himself through the Internet. even better, having a human from the real world who is at his beck and call, clearly infatuated with him and willing to do whatever he wants with the hacking talents to match? well, it would be a very beneficial situation for him 🥰 i know it's very silly but i'd love to write this out properly...i have some sketches of her and King Candy that i really need to ink;;;

my non-romantic OTP for this character: you know, the villainous characters i love often come with some kind of tragic backstory, some background trauma that led them to become the way they are...Dave the Octopus and Balthazar Bratt come to mind. with that sort of backstory, it makes it a lot easier to think of possible rehabilitation and friendships building even with those they hurt, as they seem to desperately need the affection. but this isn't the case with King Candy!! i personally don't want to see him becoming buddy-buddy with Ralph, Vanellope, the Sugar Rush Racers or any of the other video game characters that aren't villainous, as i love him as a dreadful person. it would certainly be interesting to see some kind of redemption arc for him, but when i'm looking at fan content, the stuff i like the most is when he's being his usual terrible self :3c

my unpopular opinion about this character: my definitive unpopular opinion about King Candy is that i find him far more attractive in his King Candy form than his Turbo form!! absolutely no shade to those who love Turbo and his design, i think you're all very powerful and valid 🥰💖 i'm just a big fan of fruity, queercoded, brightly-dressed characters...a kind of flamboyance is always an eye-catcher. maybe it's because Turbo's design reminds me a bit too much of the Crazy Frog 🤣

one thing i wish would happen/had happened with this character in canon: oh goodness, so so much!!! i think that the first Wreck It Ralph is perfect as it is, and wouldn't change a thing. however, my real gripes come with Wreck It Ralph 2, which i've talked about before. although most of my issues came from Knowsmore's potential as a villain and the gap that was left without attempting to fill King Candy's shoes, i would've killed for King Candy to have come back in another form. i think the worldbuilding of Wreck It Ralph is so fun that we fans can have a great time playing in its sandbox, whether that's wanting King Candy to have a total redemption arc and end up best pals with all the original WiR characters...or seeing him come back in a different, much-harder-to-kill form. i'm still holding out my hopes for King Candy to return in the third Wreck It Ralph, but if not...i'm very happy with what we have and how wonderful the fandom is ☺

this was really fun!! thanks so much for suggesting him anon - i am literally always down to gush about King Candy, he is such a delight 🥺💖 everyone, feel free to send in asks about him (or other characters for the ask game)!

[emwritesstuff]

as the world caves in | ch. 9 | bucky barnes x reader

synopsis: You are a ghost story. A former Air Force pilot who had her plane shot down by Germany in 1945, but here you were in 2023, alive and frozen in your 25-year-old body.

You haven’t seen Bucky since the 1940’s, before his fall, before you went on a suicide mission only to come back alive. You aren’t sure reliving those memories – and being a living memory of everything the man has lost – is the best for him.

But you and Bucky won’t be apart for long.

This will loosely follow the plot of TFATWS - so spoilers ahead, specially regarding episode six (finale). Thread carefully!

masterlist | AO3

notes:  thank you everyone for your patience with this chapter. I'm dropping this lil shortie so we can get the story moving. Let's go! (warnings: lil' fluff, lil' angst) (word count: 3K) nine: records

Bucky knocked on your door a few weeks later.

It was late, and you were snug in your pajamas, winding down after a long day. With your identity no longer a secret, the government was in the midst of transferring you to something more… hands-on, and definitely less diplomatic, you were assuming; so much for retirement, but you figured 30 years of it had been more time than you could’ve anticipated.

You almost didn’t hear the soft rapping on wood over Vera Lynn’s mellow singing.

When you finally opened it, you found him standing there, wearing tired eyes and a dark coat. “I’m sorry, I know it’s late, but I started walking and I—"

“When I said you’re welcome anytime, Bucky Barnes, I meant any time.”

A tiny fraction of a smile was offered your way, and you grasped it tight against your heart at the same time you do his hand, pulling him inside.

His fingers lingered on yours, but before you could start thinking about it he pulled away, taking a seat at the edge of your couch. “I finished it. The book.”

Bucky answered your question before you could ask it. “I just came from there. The last one– the last name.”

“Well. Are you alright?” You sat next to him, your knee knocking against his, and his gaze went from the floor, to the spot where your legs touched, and then to you. He knitted his eyebrows, seeming a little incredulous you were even asking.

“I will be.” His hands intertwined on the space between his knees, and you placed a hand ton his shoulder, getting him to look at you again.

“Yes, you will. Do you want to talk about it?”

One corner of Bucky’s lip raised up, and he shook his head. “Is that Vera Lynn?”

You smiled, turning to look at your record player as if Vera herself was sitting next to it. “It is. Takes me back, I guess.”

“It’s all we’d listen to at the front.”

Nodding, you wondered for a second if Bucky remembered dancing to We’ll Meet Again the night before he was shipped off. Even if you weren’t the only girl he had danced with then, you still asked yourself if that memory was burned on his mind as it was on yours.

We'll meet again, don't know where, don't know when. A short-term promise, made back then by hopeful lovers, friends, family members; you had no idea that those lyrics would prove themselves so literal when you and Bucky mouthed them at each other in the middle of a dancefloor.

You let out a breathy chuckle, standing up and beckoning him to where you kept the rest of your vinyl. “Come on. Vera’s starting to feel a little too nostalgic to me.”

Your record collection was pretty extensive, ranging from things of the good ol’ days from the special editions that were still being released nowadays. Bucky joined you on the floor, and together you started to make your way through decades eternized in discs.

“Marvin Gaye.”

You look up from The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust, finding Bucky making a face at the album he was holding. “It’s really good. Do you want to—”

“No. No more Marvin Gaye.”

You furrowed your eyebrows. “You don’t like him?”

“I like Marvin Gaye! Jesus. Marvin is good—Marvin’s jus’ fine,” Bucky rubbed his eyes with his thumb and middle finger, and you finally understood.

“Sam’s been preaching you the word of R&B to you too, huh?”

You giggled at the tired look he gave you and silently took Trouble Man out of his hands, stuffing it back with the rest of the 1970’s.

Years ago, Bucky would be delighted to dive headfirst in the new – your trips to countless science fairs and expositions were enough proof of that – but looking at him now, knowing him as you were starting to once again, you figured that just a dip of the toes was more than enough.

You pulled Frank Sinatra from the 1950’s section.

“I know Sinatra.”

“Do you now?”

You put the record on your player, and Vera Lynn’s longing gave way to Sinatra’s swagger and jazz.

“Do you?” Bucky teased, frowning at the most recent items in your collection. As soon as Frank’s voice filled the silence, he nodded. “Yeah, that’s nice.”

“I do know him! Or did. Met ‘im in 1962.” You plopped next to Bucky, who was shaking his head. “What?”

“Show off.”

“No, just been around. Met people on the way. And, you asked.” Your smirk grew into a grin as Bucky mouthed your words back at you. Then his face fell for a second, and your amusement was quickly replaced by worry. “What is it?”

“Nothing, I guess – I guess I just missed a lot.” The same way one of the corners of his lips tug on his cheek again in his attempt of a smile, melancholy tugs at your heartstrings. “I missed out on everything. And I missed out on you.”

Bucky’s head was low as he spoke and you could see the tremble of his hands, even though he clutched one of your records tightly. Nina Simone, 1960’s.

“M’not going anywhere, you know.”

“You still lived an entire lifetime—”

“I did, yes, thank you for constantly reminding me that I’m over 100 years old.” You shook your head at him, sighing softly when he chuckled.

You couldn’t blame him, for clinging to every bit of past he’d missed while he was in HYDRA’s clutches – you knew that was inevitable, but you wished that such sorrow wasn’t so related to you.

“What are you doin’?” He asked as you summoned a small stool from the side of your shelf and stepped on it.

“I want to show you somethin’.” The thing you were looking for was stored at the very top: a heavy, brown leather suitcase that almost made you lose your balance when you pulled it from the spot it had been sitting in for—honestly, years, many of them.

The contents of the suitcase rattled as you climbed down and sat next to Bucky again. Sinatra still playing, telling his lover I've got you under my skin, I've got you, deep in the heart of me;

You almost laughed from the truth and irony of it.

I'd tried so, not to give in

I said to myself this affair never will go so well

You unlocked the suitcase, revealing the gathered memories inside. Pictures, movie tickets, theater playbooks, receipts, trinkets. All souvenirs of the 80 something years of your life Bucky hadn’t been there to see.

Not organized in the slightest, the keepsakes of your life were tossed together and out of order just as in your memory: photographs of you in uniform, and sometimes in party dresses; of when you bought your house; of the few times you had pets. Posing next to famous people and other important ones whose names weren’t as well known by the world.

As you and Bucky went through each of them, you added a story or an explanation, sometimes both, to fill him in on the details of your life events. He laughed at some, frowned at a lot, stared at you intently for all of them.

“Is this Berlin?”

You hummed, nodding. “1989. That party was great.”

“Party?” Bucky knitted his eyebrows in surprise.

“The city was unified, the wall was being taken down, and everyone was celebrating. I’ve never seen that many bottles of vodka in one place.” You laughed, taking a good look at yourself in the picture.

The 80’s were definitely not your best decade, looks wise. You had tried a perm the year before, and the poodle look was only then starting to dial down. The beginnings of a bruise were starting to creep on your left eye, from the mission you had completed just a few hours before.

“I don’t think I’ve ever been that drunk.”

Bucky’s surprise intensified, his eyes wide. “We can’t get drunk.”

“Yes we can.”

“No, no we can’t.”

“We can, in fact. It’s all a matter of quantity and, well, speed.” You giggled as Bucky’s mouth gaped more.

“And the hangover?”

“Horrible. Like getting shot on the forehead. Comes quickly, too.”

He grimaced, and with one last look – certainly to register your peculiar appearance on his mind – gently put the picture back inside the suitcase. A stack of papers seemed to call out to him and he picked it up, releasing them from the band that held them together carefully.

Postcards of the places you’ve been: a small note to James Barnes and Steve Rogers on the back of each one.

Bucky’s voice faltered. He let out an anguished little sound, probably something that was supposed to be an Oh, or a What, but had no strength to crawl up his throat.

You brought your knees to your chest as you waited for him.

“You—you wrote to us?”

“I did. You can keep those, they’re addressed to you.”

After all this time, you could barely remember the words you wrote in those postcards; all you knew was that some had longer messages, others a simple Wish you were here.

“After we met in Baltimore, I thought that— that you’d have moved on from us.”

From me.

As if that was possible.

“Well, I stopped writing by 2003, give or take. But really,” You sighed. “It’s hard to forget someone when you’ve always been expecting them to come back to you.”

Bucky flipped the postcard from Rome, read the writing and smiled wistfully at it. “And, I did.”

“You did. And staying away was the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but—”

“But you’re annoyingly stubborn.” His jaw tightened, then relaxed when he smirked. “I mean, I get it – If the roles were reversed, I’d leave you rebuild your life without me like a self-sacrificing idiot too.”

Alright. That was fair.

Shaking your head, you watched as he slipped the postcards in his pocket, an amused expression on his face.

“That was… a big mistake. Something a self-sacrificing idiot would do,” You screwed your eyes shut in shame, opening them when Bucky chuckled. “but now, I’m right here. And so are you.”

His stubble scratched the soft skin of your palm when you reached for him, and you continued. “We’re a little out of place in this century, that much is true, but if I’m being honest… I’m getting tired of yearning for the past, Buck.”

Good old times – sometimes really good, sometimes bad, every one of them old – tucked away in your heart like your records were tucked in neatly in their shelf, organized by year. As you went through the decades, your enhanced body eternizing you like marble, your heart seemingly stayed at that army camp overseas. Or maybe Sergeant Bucky Barnes had taken it with him, only for them to be frozen together, leaving you with an empty hole in your chest.

You lived your life longing for that missing piece, the one with blue eyes and the dashing smile and the skilled feet.

The one that in many other stories was the one that got away, the one who now believed he was somebody else, but had brought your heart back with him all the same.

The very heart that nearly leapt out of your chest when Bucky rested his forehead against yours.

You’ve never been this close – there isn’t an ounce of past in the gesture. His eyes being tightly closed kept him from seeing the surprise on your eyes and then how they fell to his lips for a millisecond. Then, those lips brushed against yours in a featherlike touch.

I would sacrifice anything, come what might

For the sake of having you near

He pried himself off you when you exhaled, as if your very breath had electrocuted him.

“M’sorry. I—I didn’t—” He said as you stared at the back of his neck, and the shock gives way to disappointment.

I didn’t mean to. Or maybe: I didn’t want to.

“That’s—it’s okay.” You clapped your hands on your knees, still feeling the prickle of his facial hair on them, and got up to change the music.

There was no doubt Bucky was touch starved, and that he probably craved the closeness that comes with a lover. He sought that for a fleeting second in Sam’s sister, and now in you. No point in dwelling on what it might have meant.

Right?

Looking at Bucky, his expression was overcast, furrowed eyebrows as he watched you from his spot on the floor. You offered him a gentle smile, and the crease on his forehead eased up slightly.

Right.

Don't you know little fool, you never can win

The record player made a scratching sound as you replaced Frank Sinatra with your go-to jazz compilation. Instrumental.

No lyrics.

There was one thing you’ve always been good at, regarding the infatuation with Bucky Barnes that has taken over your heart for almost a century now: locking the feelings away and stepping into the shoes of the best friend.

Besides, you’ve said it yourself: no more yearning for the past. Hopefully you and Bucky would be able to do that soon enough.

At that moment, however, you needed to feel the burn of whiskey down your throat and pretend it’ll heal the calcinating rejection spreading through your chest.

The guilt you found in Bucky’s eyes as he watched you sweep around your hardwood floors made you pour a glass for him.

He took it gratefully, frowning when you bottomed the whole thing up.

“There’s a lot in here.” He tapped the edge of the suitcase, skillfully steering the conversation in the direction of the more palatable, calm territory it was in before.

The sight of your autobiographical collection made you smile.

“An entire lifetime,” You said, fishing your dog tags from the bottom. “I suppose that’s where it started. Or at least, where thisstarted.”

Bucky took them reverentially, running his thumb over the imprint of your name and numbers.

He reached for his neck, producing from under his Henley the same type of metal chain he was holding in his hands. The fact that he still wore his like that sent a sharp blow to your lungs, almost knocking the air out of you.

His face softened, a smile so beautiful spreading across his lips, so much that your chest clenched in protest because it was simply not fair, how he still had you entirely.

He deposited both of your dog tags in your hands, and that’s when you saw it, and remembered it.

“Won’t we get in trouble for this?”

“Do you care?”

“Well…No.” You sighed, already resigned. And a little excited.

Bucky knew you well: it had been too long of being a good little soldier when all you were used to was the rush of being a hellion.

“And that is why, sugar, that I’m doing this with you, and not with Steve.”

The words made your heart soar, but you were sure to recapture it before it could fly away too high, still too attached to the sensation of the take-off to clip its wings.

You liked flying.

“And because Steve hasn’t been successful in his enlisting efforts. Yet.”

Bucky looked at you from behind his eyebrows, a reprimand hiding in his eyes, but he decided to shove his uniform hat on your head instead. You grumbled, calling him a jerk under your breath.

It was the night before Bucky was drafted to England. He looked handsome in his uniform, a shining, polished star, brighter than the sun even under the dim streetlight you two stood under.

After bringing his and Steve’s dates home (yours was lost to another boxing match along the way – not that you were crying about that) Bucky had decided he was going to stay up all night, because, in his words, he could sleep when the war was over. Or, more realistically, in the ship on the way to England.

So there you two were, illuminated by street lamps and moonlight, visiting the façades and front windows of your favorite places in Brooklyn like drifters in the night.

Bucky still concentrated on his task, his shoulder hunched slightly to block your sight.

“Let me see! Bucky!”

“ ’Sposed to be a surprise! I’m almost done.”

You huffed, crossing your arms. “It’s not like I haven’t seen ‘em before.”

“You gotta be more patient. Here.”

He dropped your dog tags on your hand. You displayed the small steel plates on your palm, scanning your eyes over the two. One of them, of course, had your name, number, blood type, next of kin – an aunt you’ve never met – and address.

The other had Bucky’s.

James B Barnes. 32557038.

He slipped his own chain over his head, the plate with your name clinking against his.

You brought the tips of your fingers to your lips, feeling a smile begin to form onto them.

“I forgot we did this. I haven’t looked at these in so long.”

You had stopped wearing your dog tags the day the war had ended – Bucky was gone then, Steve too, and the weight of his dog tags slamming against your chest was too much to bear – your heart was already heavy with its own engraving of their memories.

“Steve had a lecture prepared when he gave mine back.” Bucky chuckled when you looked up at him, incredulous.

You shook your head, half exasperated and half amused. “Good grief, Steve.”

“Y’know how he is. Was,” He trailed, lips twitching as they formed a thin line.

You reached for him, your hand hovering in the space between you for a second before Bucky took it, lacing your fingers. Scooting closer, you let your cheek rest on his shoulder.

“He’d be glad we’re reunited.” You said, raising your head to peek at him and the newfound upwards curl of his lip. “And mortified we’re still bickering.”

Bucky smiled and squeezed your hand. “Old people. Old habits.”

Laughter bubbled out of your chest, and you realized a few things.

In that moment, it didn’t matter – the heartache, the unrequited side of your love. It was just a fact, a fact of life, of your life, that you a lot of the times loved him as more than your best friend. You loved him. And that was the core of it, the most important fact.

And you knew he loved you – you had each other – in this big, ever-changing, modern world, you had Bucky and Bucky had you.

You sat in comfortable, familiar silence until your eyelids grew heavy and you felt yourself drifting in and out of consciousness.

“You dozin’ on me, sugar?”

“It’s been a long day.” You said with your eyes still closed, feeling him chuckle beside you.

“Tell me about it. I can go—”

“You know damn well you should stay.” You patted his arm and hoisted yourself up from the floor. “I’ll get the pull-up ready for you.”

As you sauntered towards the office, ignoring his pleads and protests that he’s got it, he doesn’t need sheets or anything, you put your dog tags back on.

They jingled lightly against your heart.

Maybe you didn’t have to leave all of the past behind to start building something good and new, after all.

[aenngelic]

I will protect her at all costs (chapter 2)

Disclaimer: please don’t hate me for it, if you don’t ship them please just don’t read it ok 🥲

contains: slow burn, Sniper falling in love with Kuon, Snipers view/thoughts, sexual fantasies, nudity, lemon stuff overall

It is a very long chapter I’m sorry

Note: please feel free to message me if you have certain romantic moments to include in the story! (Already running out of ideas oops)

It did not take long for us to find a bag of supplies. It was on a coffee table in some sort of lobby area. It seemed as if this building probably was meant to represent some kind of hotel, which I thought was a good thing, because that meant that there would be beds and showers to be found here as well. To our surprise, the bag contained mostly candy, which I wouldn't interpret as a balanced meal. However, the girl seemed to like this finding. It was only a matter of minutes before the chocolate residue stained the corners of my companion's mouth in a brown color. However, I preferred to smoke a cigarette at first and watch the girl devour her own body weight in the form of chocolate.

" This is fantastic! It feels like forever since I last ate chocolate! I faintly remember dieting before I entered this world too, so this must have been probably weeks since I held chocolate in my hand." Kuon said with delight. It was amusing to watch her enjoy sweets. Kuon's carelessness may be a burden at times, but her innocent character makes up for it.

" you partly remember your life prior to this, don't you?"

" Yes, not much to be honest. I'm sorry you can't," Kuon replied in a concerned voice.

"Tell me about it."

She gave me a visibly puzzled look before straightening her back so that she was sitting as straight as a candle on the sofa across from me, staring at her hands somewhat lost in thought. She seemed uncomfortable that I had now brought up this topic. Unfortunately, I could not take back my question. "Well," she began, "to be honest,the life I remember has not been the greatest, I guess." Kuon abruptly shook her head. " That's not true either. I was born into a rich family and had many privileges. My father owned a large company and had very high expectations of me from the very beginning. One day I was supposed to take it over. I was probably pretty lucky compared to other people. I was probably a big disappointment for him. My character was just not strong enough in his eyes. I also remember not really having any friends either, because I was privately educated. And anyway..." I could literally hear the lump in Kuon's throat as a tear began to stream down the girl's cheek.

" i'm sorry. You know, I didn't really mean to end up crying."

I felt my heart break once again, watching the girl grieve. I was surprised now, though, to find out that this yet seemingly uncomplicated high school student was actually carrying a lot of emotional baggage. I did not hesitate as I jumped up from my seat to calm the blue-haired girl. I really hated it like the plague when she cried. Trying to preserve my Coolness, however, I grumbled, "oh girl. What's wrong?"

I placed myself to her left, and pressed her against my shoulder while running my hand over her hair a few times. There was no way I could bring myself to face her, though. It would be too embarrassing and, after all, I was far from being the Prince Charming who would dry her tears with a silken tissue. Besides, I could not withstand the sight of her teary eyes. So there I sat, a weeping teenage girl wetting my blazer with salty drops of grief on my right, awkwardly staring off into the distance.

"It's, it's..." she stammered, not being able to form a word. "You're the first person I've been able to trust, and because of that, I'm kind of..."

She took a deep breath, "It makes me so unbelievably happy."

Almost for the second time that day, a cigarette nearly got stuck in my throat, but this time I was able to suppress my urge to cough. The girl seemed to really like me. But did I like her too? I would be lying if I said I did not care about her. And if she got killed, I could never forgive myself. It was astonishing how one could form such a strong bond with another person in such a short period of time. However, pouring out my entire feelings in front of her would not come close to the cool lifestyle I was pursuing.

" i'm also happy to have met you, Kuon.", i finally decided to answer after a moment of figuring out how to respond.

Kuon's face, which was still streaked with tears, started to smile again, which made me feel much relieved. However, it took her a while to completely stop her wailing . We remained in this position for a while, until at some point I realized that the girl had fallen asleep. Her head had lowered in the meantime even further toward the ground, so that after some time she was no longer leaning against my shoulder but much rather against my belly. When I noticed this after some time and looked down to the girl, a cute sight presented itself to me. Admittedly, on the one hand it felt nice to act as this girl's pillow. On the other hand, it triggered an immeasurable amount of embarrassment in me. But cool guys do like to take care of girls' comfort, don't they?

Therefore, I decided I'd rather not wake her up and hardly moved at all. I looked out the window to my right, watching the sunset and reflected on certain issues. I was thinking about Rika as well as the two girls we were trying to find and, of course, about Kuon and so many other things until my eyes started to close.

When I regained consciousness, the night must have settled in. Before I could even perceive my surroundings properly, I swiveled my head once to the left and once to the right and let my gaze wander through the room. Because the moon was particularly bright this night, everything around me had taken on a deep blue tone. It was so quiet around me that I could have heard a pin drop. In the next second I realized that I should not have fallen asleep in the first place. Somebody would have had to keep watch, after all! Crap! If an enemy would have come along the way, it certainly would not have been good for me and Kuon. I looked down to my thigh where the blue-haired girl was supposed to lie. I felt her place her head on my thigh at some point during the night, but when I looked down at my thigh, I could not find any girl. Where the hell was Kuon? A rational thinking person, as I was one, could of course assume that my companion did not necessarily have to be in danger, but could also have simply visited the toilet, for example. Nonetheless, my alarm bells started ringing immediately. Kuon was, after all, a young girl who, apart from the "rail gun", did not posses many possibilities for self-defense. So of course I was worried.

Without thinking much, I hopped up from the sofa, on which I had been napping a few moments before. In quick stride I wandered through the poorly lit hallway without really having a clue where I was heading. My head was foggy from the idea that the girl might be in serious danger. A few days ago, I probably would have accepted the fact that she was suddenly nowhere to be found and continued my journey. And now my stomach was already twisting at the thought of her getting in trouble.

Nevertheless, a short moment later, my heart pounding madly from the ever-repeating scenario in my head, I heard a noise at the end of the corridor. A soft, high-pitched humming was heard, drowned out by the pattering of many drops. Light emerged from the crack of a door on the left. Was she taking a shower? The feeling of relief spread through my chest, followed by some degree of annoyance. Why did the girl not wake me up? I took a few steps towards the door, but before I was about to reach for the door handle, I remembered that I should not do so. A gentleman never violates a lady's privacy. So I decided to wait.

I leaned against the local wall, one leg bent. Then I let my thoughts wander, while the pattering of the raindrops in the bathroom right next to me showed no indication of stopping anytime soon. A lady of high society must spend quite a bit of her life showering, I thought to myself. And before I knew it, the image of Kuon suddenly popped up in my head. In my imagination I pictured her body, wondering what it looked like completely naked. A bar of soap running over her plump breasts, leaving traces of foam on her soft, wet skin. A body swinging under the hot rainfall like a leaf in the wind, presenting its vivid buttocks. I wonder if she was shaved? Hardly had I been able to finish this dirty thought of mine and get mad at my filthy thinking when my ears picked up the sound of footsteps in the distance. And they were coming ominously closer.

Damn, I thought to myself and was about to reach for my rifle, only to realize that I forgot it next to the sofa where I had been sleeping. I had been so upset about her disappearance that I could seriously forget the most crucial item for our survival.What was I going to do? For a brief moment I was at a loss. Escape proved almost impossible at this point, since I was at a dead end and I could not force the approaching enemy down with any surrounding objects. Besides, if I escaped, it would only be a matter of time before the enemy would track down my helpless companion. In the next moment, almost instinctively, I reached for the door handle that led to the bathroom that Kuon had still claimed. Perhaps there were objects in the room that were suitable for fighting, or perhaps we could be lucky and not be found, I speculated in the heat of the moment. So I tore open the door and rushed into the bathroom, greeted by a hot haze that took over the entire area.

"Kuon!" I called out in a hushed tone.

Without hesitation, I pushed my way through the door that separated the shower from the rest of the bathroom as if I was walking through nothing. Until that moment, I had hardly given a thought to the circumstances of this situation. But at the latest, when finally the naked body of a schoolgirl jumped into my field of vision, I quickly realized this again. I was just about to violate Kuon's privacy. An obviously shocked girl looked towards me, that from 1 second to the other tried to cover herself desperately.

"Mr.Ma-", she was about to say, but I interrupted her raised voice by pressing my hand to her lips as quickly as possible.

While I was still in the act of stepping into the shower, I flicked the light switch in the same movement so that no sign of our presence could escape from the room. Maybe they would not find us here, I hoped at this point.

"There's someone out there," I whispered to the naked girl in front of me.

" if we are quiet, maybe we won't be found. If we are, then..."

Kuon replied to me with an unintelligible "Mmm" , which resembled the sound of a frightened gasp. My body had pressed so close to hers by now that I could feel the wetness of her skin soaking through my shirt. I had directed my face facing away from her so that I could sharpen my hearing for the footsteps I could hear. Furthermore , I did not want to add unnecessary tension to the whole situation. It was uncool enough to interfere with a naked girl taking a shower even if it was an emergency. My hand was still resting on her lips and even though I was wearing gloves and looking away, I could clearly feel the warmth building up in Kuon's cheeks. She was obviously blushing in this moment. But having her pressed against the bathroom wall while forcing my hand tightly onto her lips and not even keeping a distance of not 2 inches, I could not blame her.

For quite a while, we did not move at all. We listened closely to the footsteps, which came a little closer and finally slowly moved away from us again. Temporarily it was even so quiet in this bathroom that we could hear each other breathing. Kuon's breathing was fast and almost verged on hyperventilation in this situation. Because there was hardly any distance between our bodies, I could literally feel her chest rising and falling in short intervals. With each rise, her breasts brushed my upper body a slight bit. I tried, as always, to keep my composure and block out the fact that Kuon was completely naked. Only when several minutes had passed did my posture loosen and I breathed a sigh of relief.

"Okay, we should be safe for now," I stated and let go of the girl.

I flipped the light switch and had to swallow.

Kuon had been naked before too, but it was only now that the danger was gone that I could really comprehend this fact. She had tried to cover her breasts with her hands and had simultaneously crossed her legs, looking down with a shameful expression on her face. However, the concealment attempt seemed to be unsuccessful for her. Although I only caught a glimpse of her appearance before I turned away from her as quickly as possible, I saw her entire beauty for a moment.Her breasts were in relation to her otherwise so petite body, large and plump. She had a narrow waist and perfectly shaped legs, in combination with her smooth, fair skin. And so she shaved, I could still tell. What remained most imprinted on my mind, however, was the look on her face.I of course preferred to see her friendly smile a thousand times more than this face that expressed pure shame. But I could not help but adore the sight of her big sparkling dog eyes looking at the ground helplessly.

My breath stopped for a moment, but then I quickly cleared my throat, my gaze already averted from her, scanning the room for a towel. I tried to hide the fact that I actually wanted to slap myself for the thoughts I was having. Luckily, my embarrassment was not visible through the mask. I had to change the subject immediately before the situation became even more awkward:

"Sorry, Kuon." , I mumbled. I was surprised myself by my harsh tone. It took me a while to recollect the words.

"You should let me know next time you decide to go somewhere else."

"Oh yeah right. I didn't mean to cause any trouble.", Countered the girl who also seemed to be a bit embarrassed. So it wasn't just me who was feeling uncomfortable about this situation. Without giving my companion another look, I threw a towel right over my head at her. I had a precise aim.

" I'm going to get my rifle. I forgot it in all the hurry near the sofa."

Just as I was about to open the door to step out, the girl interrupted my process by grabbing my arm with unusual intensity.

" can you come back here afterwards? Please?"

"That's what I was planning on doing anyway. I'll be waiting right outside the door," I replied, a bit puzzled by this question.

" but I have -." she interrupted herself, shaking her head slightly before continuing.

Then her facial expression regained its former composure, whereupon she gave me her typical, beaming smile. I could tell, however, that she did not mean it honestly. How I could tell that, I had no idea myself though. But did she want me to stay here with her?

" no you're right. I'll hurry up and be done in a few minutes," she said. While she was talking, she wrapped the towel around her body in a quick movement, fastening it in front with the help of a knot.

I had meanwhile turned my gaze back to her. Although Kuon was now dressed, it was difficult for me not to inspect her from top to bottom. Her entire body was still drenched in a hint of wetness, so that her skin was reflectingthe bright bathroom light. It was also slightly red from the hot shower water. I wondered if the red tint to her cheeks was also caused by that, or if I was responsible for it.I could not help but notice the way the towel just managed to hide all the places it was supposed to cover and yet was far too tight. If she bent over, a special view would present itself to me. Immediately I dashed this disgusting thought from my head. If I continued to reduce myself only to her appearance this could end in negligence on my part and I would not be able to protect her properly.After all, that was the most important thing. I also discarded this thought. Had this strange girl really become so important to me? Nevertheless, there was no place for interpersonal relationships in this world.Before I could get any further into this train of thought, I turned away again and finally walked out of the room. I was in need of a cigarette.

[jellyluchi]

It's the one year anniversary of jellyluchi!!! 🥳💜🥰

I'm so happy I made this blog... I didn't think it would function the way it does now, at all! The way I was used to participating in fandom was very different back then. I would make graphics and maybe write canon ship fics. I made this account just to read Prosciutto x reader works, that's it 💀 and maybe find old content of him. I wasn't used to reading x reader works and I thought it was extremely embarrassing because self-shipping is frowned upon and people looked down on others who enjoy x reader fanfics. No one understood my self-ship with him and how I love him.

I was afraid of exposing myself on main for some reason and was EXTREMELY shy about my love for Pros. I couldn't even talk about him without going on anon (shoutout to [insert some blogs I'm too shy to mention] who I sent anons to thirsting after Prosciutto back then and feeling sad about shipping with him, some of whom are my MUTUALS now?!??! which is crazy) and was sad all the time thinking I was no good for him. But he made me so incredibly happy I just had to have a sanctuary where I could archive all my absolute favorite content for him. And thus, this blog was born.

I used to frequent other people '#prosciutto' tag very obsessively and read and re read so many of my fav works that I was frustrated having to bookmark the links instead of just going to a tag I made myself. I did want to start writing for him because I knew in the coming months that content for La Squadra would dwindle (especially for Pros) so I thought I could make content for myself to make me happy. (Shoutout to creators who write and draw for La Squadra!!! YOU are the backbone!!!). I was too scared to share my writing at first thinking it'd be no good either but I'm so glad it is received well, at this point I'm just happy to have fun with everyone instead of worrying if my content is good / bad etc 🥺

The idea of making an OC was completely out of the question! I'd never done anything in-depth like that before despite trying to make OCs in the past which ended up in me not being passionate enough to develop them. But because of the help and inspiration I've encountered here I was able to pull through and create a character that I love very very dearly.

Then came the wonderful people I met because of this blog in the past year. I couldn't thank each person enough for what they've done for me 🥺 every single person who's interacted with me has encouraged me to show my love for Pros more and not be ashamed and it lead me to be so much more of a happier person. This blog most definitely changed my life! In so many ways !! I made wonderful friends and memories thanks to this blog, found a community of people that help me feel accepted and who have fostered a better friendship with me than I could do for many years!!! In previous fandoms I tried to connect with large groups but inevitably there would be a fallout and I wouldn't be interested anymore (or worse, getting involved in drama). In the end I would lose passion for the source material and move on. But I feel like the connections are very personal this time around 🥰.

I just hope to continue making happy memories with this blog, it's such a big part of me now, I don't even check my main blog anymore. This is one of the only places I can be honest about my feelings and have fun which is so important to me! Thank you for everyone who has stuck around so far idk how to thank you enough 🥺💜💜💜 Thank you for your love and support, for encouraging me, for liking my thoughts and feeling for Pros and my ramblings about Focaccia, and everything else in between!!!! There were many times I thought perhaps I should abandon this place but... I'm so happy I stuck around. Here's to many more years!!!