#and I'm not even joking at all
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cannibal-pentecost · 5 days ago
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Lili I have seen you reblogging this hot black haired vampire girl in the with suit with the hat from Hellsing and been so curious about her :3 Please tell me about who Girlycard and Ladycard are and their relationship to Alucard :o?
Okay, so, Alucard in the anime Hellsing and Hellsing: Ultimate is an effeminate twunk who either wears bondage gear or a suit with a red trenchcoat.
His whole thing is that he's Dracula but during the Novel Dracula by Bram Stoker, Doctor Hellsing bound him with some kind of occult magic into being a servant to his family line until the end of time.
So, Alucard fights in WW2 against the Nazis as a loli with a tommy gun and then gets locked into the Hellsing Manor Basement for 40 to 50 years until young Integra Hellsing finds him and releases him so he can help her kill her uncle who is trying to kill her because the Hellsing family is rich a part of the British Round Table, a cabal of the wealthiest old nobility working directly under the royal family to kill monsters.
Thing with Alucard is that they divide themself into different forms with their own personalities that are still "Alucard/Dracula".
There's modern Alucard who hides his sadness and suicidal urges behind being a scary dog with snark who loves to verbally fence with Sir Integra.
There's Vlad Tepes, his original form from when he died his first death and rose as a vampire, who is somber and way more genuine and sincere in his sentiments he shares to his allies and enemies alike.
There's his actual literal demon dog form he can turn into.
And then there's Girlycard, not an official name, but the most popular fan name, she is that loli from WW2, she's more impish and willing to play with her food and pretty childish.
The context for some of this can be inferred from how young child Vlad was sexually abused until he became a man and gained the title of Vlad the Impaler.
So, we have a plural therian genderfluid transfem with tons of issues she suppresses through violence and wearing a masculine face while one of the main core identities that comes out is a little girl who is powerful and strong and confident in all the ways she wasn't in her mortal childhood.
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lazylittledragon · 1 year ago
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can't believe we're all adults being forced into the club penguin level of censorship in 2024
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egophiliac · 4 months ago
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So I was doing some math, and I THINK Skully is almost as tall as Malleus without his horns
I think the main reference to his height is Epel being surprised they're the same age because he's taller than Sebek, yes? which I find interesting, considering Jade and Malleus -- two of the tallest guys in the main cast -- are also there. and, since I've never been one to not think waaaay too much about the absolute stupidest minutiae about fictional characters, I see two possibilities:
one is that Epel is extremely good at eyeballing heights (I actually do feel like he could be? like. I'd believe he can estimate someone's height fairly accurately by calculating based on the life stages of an apple tree, or how many apples tall they are, or something else apple-related like that.) and Scully does, perhaps, fall into that narrow margin between Sebek and Jade in height.
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OR two, out of the three certified Tall Guys there, Sebek is Epel's main frame of reference because he's the only one he's had any real interaction with for, let's be fair, pretty obvious reasons.
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SO in conclusion, we still have no concrete answers and will probably have to wait until next year when we get his card profile, alas alas. 😔
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aethersea · 5 months ago
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I do think Blazing Saddles handled its one depiction of native americans very poorly, and the full extent of its representation of chinese workers on the railroad is they were literally just there. not even one single speaking line. unclear if this is worse or better than the redface.
it's fucking phenomenal at lampooning antiblack racism though. extremely blatant, extremely funny satire, which is constantly and loudly saying "racism is the philosophy of the terminally stupid at best and morally depraved at worst, and we should all be pointing and laughing at them 24/7"
plus the main character is a heroic black man who has to navigate a whole lot of bullshit but is constantly smirking at the extraordinarily stupid racists and inviting the audience into the joke. the one heroic white character is a guy who was suicidally depressed until he met the protagonist and they just instantly became buds, and he's firmly in a supporting role the whole time and happy to be there. the protagonist saves the day with the help of his black friends from the railroad, and uses the position of power he was given to uplift not only those friends, but all the railroad workers of other minorities too, in an explicit show of solidarity.
anyone saying "Blazing Saddles is racist" had better be talking about its treatment of non-black minorities. it had better not be such superficial takes as "oh but they say the n-word all the time" or "they have nazis and the kkk in there!" because goddamn if that's the full extent of your critique I very seriously suggest you read up on media analysis. there is too much going over your head, you need to learn to recognize satire.
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adamsrcnan · 7 months ago
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do you guys think that when neil got back home from cali he took andrew up to the roof where he sat watching him smoke and told him he put a hit out on a raven. and then andrew sat there in silence watching the sunset before asking "why?" and neil looked down fiddling with his own lit cigarette and said very quietly that this particular raven was jean's drake. do you think that andrew went very still and did not speak or smoke for such a long time that neil eventually looked up at him and was taken aback by how andrew was watching him very carefully. do you think that as andrew looked at neil he was so paralysed by the thought of jean going through that same abuse and neil putting an end to it without even thinking twice. do you think he realised his meter had officially broken and neil was so far past 100% and that he was really truly it for him
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emolionsrawr · 8 months ago
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gerrard: buckley, what in the devils name are you doing?
buck, with a clipboard in hand: well, gerrard, i was going over everything in the firehouse and i noticed some things
gerrard: what is it buckley?
buck: well, you sir are in violation of the sexual orientation, gender identity or gender expression discrimination act, over the past week i've noticed you refer to henretta wilson with slurs, very offensive slurs, as well as myself, due to this myself and mrs wilson have made note of each time you've done this, and reported it to our head HR representative, this here *hands gerrard a piece of paper* is a letter from the chief, requesting your presence for a meeting about your retirement
gerrard: you fucking fa-
bobby: i'd be careful if i was you gerrard, and get out of MY firehouse
gerrard: *screws up the paper and leaves*
chimney: see i told you all we needed to do was set clipboard buck on his ass
hen: look i know i'm a lesbian, but buck has never looked so good before
buck: i am the defender of lesbians!!
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benevolenterrancy · 4 months ago
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Scholarly peak is catching up on recent literature
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lilybug-02 · 10 months ago
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Eimmet High...temmiE high. OMG!
Part 28 || First || Previous || Next
--Full Series--
Next update may take...much longer! I have finals and an internship and not to mention I have to draw- A LOT :')
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wolfram-but-art · 10 months ago
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i can't stop thinking about them..............
reblogs > likes
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xxplastic-cubexx · 1 month ago
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Marvel's Squirrel Girl: The Unbeatable Radio Show! | All of Erik Lehnsherr's Call-In's
Episodes featured: The Fate of My Universe The Sinister Six Are No More Who Would Win In A Fight? Unbeatable
Full Podcast Playlist (Spotify)
Credits below:
Written by: Ryan North
Directed by: Giovanna Sardelli
Voice Cast: Milana Vayntrub - Squirrel Girl/Doreen Green Crystal Lucas Perry - Nancy Whitehead Leo Sheng - Koi Boi/Ken Shiga Davied Morales - Chipmunk Hunk/Tomas Lara-Perez Erica Schroeder - Tippy T. Squirrel Rob Nagle - Erik Lehnsherr
Key Art: "Squirrel Girl Infinity Comic (2022)" by Derek Charm - Doreen, Nancy, Ken, Tomas, Tippy "Magneto (2023)" by Todd Nauck - Erik
#marvel#x-men#squirrel girl#magneto#cherik#i'm not tagging everyone im too drunkf rothat#i dont have a tag for vids DAMIt> this gon be my only oen#snap chats#HERE IT ISS !!!!! FINALLY !!! LIKE FOUR MONTHS IN THE MAKING <- was just too lazy to do it#i thought id focus on work all day but OOPSIEE !!!!!!!!! i was too inspired#legally had to use nauck's art that's another goat of mine ... i love his style sm its so cute and expressive and bold...#theres small things in this that bother me but whatever ive literally done this all day#im posting it and moving on#im forcing you to reblog this. DO IT#i kept giggling while makign this cause mags is so funny ....#im still crying at him being like 'yeah i said i was never going back AND I MEANT IT'#also doreen a cherik shipper ...... queen behavior i always knew it#PLEASE ENJOY !!! IM BEGGING YOU !!!! im pinning this to my blog idc this took forever#also his call ins are genuinely so funny i love him so much. my silly peepaw.....#take a shot every time he says 'charles' tho i swear to god#i was actually going to do that tongiht but Legit the amount of whiskey i had was not enough HE SAYS CHARLES SO MUCH#im ending the tags here so i dont go on a rant about how in love mags is with charles. enoug..#NOT EVEN A PODCAST SERRIES IS SAFE FROM CHERIK IM CRYINGGGGGG#they will makethemselves a probelm to EVERYONE#'please dont be evil' he'll be worse. he'll be needy jLVKAJ ERIK IS SO NEEDY IM CRYING#ok i think thats all i have to sya . im a lil tipsy so i cant think right#WAIR I REMEMBER I WANTED TO CRY ABOUT ERIKS STPID 'SWEETOOTH' JOKE I HATE HIM !!!! <- deeply in love with him#'snap you said you were drinking like ten minutes ago are you fr' dont look at me. GOOD NIGHT !!!
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i-dreamed-i-had-a-son · 3 months ago
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So I'm fully in a Transformers Prime binge rewatch and holy SMOKES I did not remember how gay this show was. Like obviously Starscream is twinktown central and Knockout is very flamboyant, yes--but Megatron is so obsessed with Optimus (and vice versa) it's not even funny! Here's a compilation of the best moments from *just the first half of S1*:
Megatron returns after who knows how long and one of the first things out of his mouth is "No one rids me of Optimus Prime except me!!"
Megatron "dies" and Optimus is immediately depressed to the point where Ratchet asks about it and unlocks Sad Reminiscing
The Autobots are trying to figure out what the Decepticons are up to and Optimus starts with "Starscream is no Megatron, but--" just say you miss him
Megatron is literally comatose and his coma dream is him and Optimus fighting over and over again. Optimus just keeps respawning. Bro is LITERALLY living in his head rent free
In fact when Bumblebee gets inside Megatron's head Optimus is literally the First Thing he sees
Why is Bee in there? Because Optimus is deathly sick! And one of the only things that rouses Optimus from his nearly catatonic state? Learning Megatron is alive!
Megatron is also the only one who has the knowledge to save him so now they're both on their deathbeds together and their fates are linked etc. etc.
Bumblebee gets the info he needs by telling Megatron that if he doesn't give them the cure, Optimus will die (and Megatron will therefore not get to kill him)
Megatron (who had figured out this was all about Optimus before Bee even told him): "After our deep history together, to NOT watch the spark ebb from his eyes with my very own...well played, Scout." And then he gives him the cure
Starscream is about to kill Optimus and Megatron--as the FIRST thing he does after getting out of his coma--literally knocks him out of the sky, saves Optimus's life (priorities), and completely lets Optimus go. Which brings the Deliberately Saving Optimus's Life count up to 2!
Will add on as the show continues, but this is just like. 14 episodes in. At this point, forget allegations, they've been fully tried and convicted lol
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adamoose-art · 1 month ago
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Isat Doodle Dump #2!
I've been excited to share this page for so long!
Minor Act 3 and 4 spoilers, (accidental) Act 6 spoiler (below the cut)
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Click through for close ups of some of my favorites on this page! Doodles with text on them have alt text in case it's hard to read.
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(accidental) two hats spoiler under cut
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By the time I got to act 4 I had my theories, and this seemed so funny.
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dustykneed · 5 months ago
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so jim got bit by a space mushroom that takes away his impulse control... welcome to daycare on the bridge with his xo and cmo
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obviously the salad cat meme is still going strong in the 23rd century because these guys reenact it on a daily basis lmaoo
prompt fill for @mcspirkevents' mcspirk bingo prompt "mask off" 🩵💙💛
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lloydfrontera · 1 year ago
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the webcomic can have one (1) funny "earnest moment interrupted by comedy" joke. as a treat. but also because it is so in character for them ajkshdjkas
yes they will say the most earnest shit to each other and then immediately try to cringe out of their own bodies. they are best friends but they would rather jump out of a window before admitting it. they are incredibly devoted and grateful to one another but you could not water board that out of either of them.
the only thing that can get either of them to admit how much they care for each other is if the other is in life threatening danger and not a second before aakjshdks
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obscureenthusiast · 2 years ago
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-Brutus and as many as 60 co-conspirators, circa March 14th, 44 BC
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lazylittledragon · 30 days ago
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not to be Anxious on main but i've got my performance review for my apprenticeship in a few weeks to see if they're going to keep me on permanently and i am gently shitting myself hnhhhhh
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