#and I'm fully aware it's bad but I literally don't know what to do???

[sparkles-oflight]

Tomorrow I have to do some blood analysis... I'm terrified of needles. Wish me luck

[girlscience]

the past few weeks I've been feeling basically zero dysphoria and yet the amount I was thinking about my body didn't decrease even slightly

[buttercupshands]

Thinking about what happened in the summer

Kids are... Really different when it comes to spending three weeks without their parents

Some start crying near the end of first day

Some start crying after couple of days

And some don't show anything while feeling the same

And being... I think English has a good word for that, let's go with a teacher but mix it with caretaker a little bit

I think seeing a kid cry at the end of that first day finally short circuited my brain, teens are way harder to understand that pre-teens who are literally still kids

They come around after a week, settle down and find new friends and your job stays the same mostly to be the one controlling their behavior

And then you'd have a kid crying again, because they miss home and the only thing you can really do is comfort them that they're not stuck here forever and that time flows so fast they won't notice it

And maybe they didn't. Time really did flew and they were leaving

Parents visited kids sometimes, of course, and it was so scary at first but they were mostly friendly and nice

Maybe because of that group chat that let them see that their kids are fine and are having fun

In the end for kids it was painful at first, but fun in the end. I got hugged more times than I could count when they were all leaving

And then poof

Back to your own life you go, like nothing happened

[thethingything]

I need to get ready for bed but I remembered the dentist appointment that's coming up in less than 2 weeks and ended up dissociating for over 2 hours (I'm honestly not sure how long it's been) and I do not feel good in the slightest after that

[genericpuff]

wait wait wait, regarding that Minthe post, you're telling me that Rachel literally wrote the character as having BPD.....and portrayed her as an abusive mean piece of shit??? WOW. fucking WOW. sorry for being so angry, but even if she "retconned" that - it's still so god damn disrespective. as someone who has BPD it hurts so much to see my mental illness villanised :(

ugh I'm so sorry pal. and I don't blame you for being angry about it, like I don't even have BPD and I'M fucking pissed LOL like I can understand why Rachel might have wanted to backtrack from that knowing fully well that Minthe's story wasn't gonna have a happy ending, but writing her with BPD in the first place and then BACKTRACKING from it as soon as she likely got heat for it (or just realized it wasn't a good look) isn't much better because it means now all she's done is written the stigmatized negative effects of BPD into her character without showing the more positive outlooks of healing and managing. Maybe that was doomed to happen considering Minthe is someone who doesn't get a happy ending in the myths, but it begs the question of why she'd write her with BPD to begin with because in hindsight it really does seem like she just wanted to use it as a way to make her "evil".

But like, when you read the actual episode, you can SEE the potential there for character growth, you can SEE that she's aware of her actions - but doesn't understand why she's "like that" which is a VERY common feeling among people with undiagnosed mental illnesses - but it was never meant to be.

Like jfc not only is it HEAVILY IMPLIED, but again, the episode is literally called "Splitting". And we see exactly that with Minthe, who can't seem to rationalize with herself that she messed up.

But... that leads me to another point that I failed to mention in that first ask response: she DIDN'T mess up. Like, yes, she messed up by escalating it to the point of slapping Hades, but it wasn't her fault that she didn't make it to her date with Hades. Whose fault was it?

Continuously throughout the first season we see Thetis being an awful influence who manipulates and gaslights Minthe. They're "friends", but it's clear Thetis does not have Minthe's best interests in mind. In this very scene we see Thetis manipulate Minthe and even attempt to get her so drunk that she won't be able to show up to her date. And then of course when that plan works and Minthe freaks out, Thetis spins it around on Minthe in a very passive-aggressive way.

But of course, the narrative has to find a way to turn this whole thing on Minthe being the bad guy. Hence we get the slap which shifts the focus entirely away from what led up to it back onto Hades who has, in a lot of ways, put her in a situation that she can't control. And of course, being in those kinds of situations does not help with mental health.

Like, sorry, I'm really going off here now, but... the slap happens in Episode 76.

When is it finally addressed again? Episode 103.

It took Rachel nearly THIRTY EPISODES to finally bring it back to Minthe, and in that time the reader has spent SEVERAL EPISODES reading about how sad and lonely Hades is, and about how cute and lovey he is with Persephone. The reader has not had ANY time to reflect on Minthe's circumstances, because it completely pivots away from her to focus on H x P as a sort of distraction from the fact that Minthe is a victim in her own right.

And when it DOES return to Minthe in 103, we get this harrowing reminder that her entire life is dependent on Hades-

And once again, here comes Thetis to the "rescue", reinforcing the negative feedback loop that Minthe is trapped in where she's put in unhealthy situations. She drags her to a bar and the whole time Minthe is not having fun because she's understandably still reeling from what happened.

Now we DO get some character development here, where Minthe realizes exactly what I've just finished explaining, that Thetis isn't her friend, that she'd rather not have Thetis as a friend than continue being talked down to and manipulated.

But then, as we know, because Rachel still needs Minthe to be the "bad guy", the breakup between Hades and Minthe winds up being all about Persephone from a POV that attempts to villainize Minthe for being "jealous" (rather than focusing on how shitty Hades actually is for having an emotional affair with Persephone to begin with) and then Minthe goes right back to hanging out with Thetis anyways for the sake of having the "evil other girl" who wants to "ruin" H x P's relationship.

It's not until Season 3 that we finally see Minthe tell Thetis to fuck off for good, but by then it's too little too late, and Minthe has lost an entire character arc. Rachel tries to go "see! Minthe's life is so much better now that she's taking care of children!" but that's an entirely different solution to a problem Minthe never had. She never got treatment for her BPD. She just got away from H x P which, while is a good thing, isn't actually analyzed as such. It's treated more as a "good thing" for H x P and the readers, because now they don't have to be subjected to Minthe's evil scheming anymore, something something "the evil is defeated". And don't even get me started on this comic's problem with constantly resolving female characters' story arcs through motherhood.

It bums me out so fucking much. Minthe deserved so much better. She's one of the many characters in LO who make it so painfully ironic when they're done dirty, because despite Rachel's attempts to write a "feminist retelling" that focuses on "moving on from trauma", she's inadvertently done more damage to feminism and the stigmas around mental health and trauma through her assassination of grounded and realistic and relatable characters like Minthe and Demeter who are shown ZERO empathy or understanding for their actions (unless it can be done so by making Persephone and Hades into the heroes). It happens so often throughout the comic it almost feels like how the comic markets itself as a "progressive feminist retelling" is some sick joke that I'm just not getting.

[whipped-for-kpop-fics]

There's a snake in my pants - K.MG

🤠Who; Kim Mingyu (Seventeen) x gender-neutral reader 🤠What; Crack/humour. Some fluff. Established relationship. Himbo Mingyu! [I love himbo Gyu] 🤠Word count; 2.3k 🤠Warnings; Profanity. Critter mentions (literally the word critter plus snake but uhhh not the animal). Misuse of a lasso, bad Mingyu, but it's funny dw. And no one gets hurt. Mentions of pervert/voyeur Wonwoo but it's not plot relevant. Very suggestive in general but no smut or actual sexual actions. Reader wears lingerie.

Although there isn't any smut, this is definitely an 18+ fic so Minors do NOT interact. I WILL block any account that interacts without an age indicator in the bio.

Summary; Your boyfriend wants to try a new sexy roleplay idea, it doesn't go well.

-2024 Masterlist-

A/N- This goes out to @ourdawnishotterthanourday , I hope you enjoy reading this as if you don't already know exactly what's going to happen anyway from my screaming about the himbo cowboy collective (omg series idea???) Thank you for encouraging me to live my best crack life, sweetheart 💖 And big thank you to @wonuvs for helping me so much with the header, I know it must've been hard to look at shirtless Mingyu so much 💖

Approximately twenty minutes ago, your lovable idiot of a boyfriend told you to go and wait on your bed for him, gave you a wink then skipped off with an excited giggle. Which, cute, yes, but also very very worrying.

As much as you adore Mingyu, you are very aware that he has some rather questionable ideas in general, what with him being what you would call a Class A Himbo; and unfortunately, he has brought those questionable ideas into the bedroom on more than one occasion. There is now a strict rule about no balloons in the bedroom and likely not for the reason you think.

So although you do go to your shared room and get dressed down in a lingerie set you know that he likes, you truly can't say that you exactly have high hopes for whatever your boyfriend has planned.

When the door creaks open, you're confused because all you see is Mingyu's hand appearing from one side to nudge the door open as wide as it can go. It takes a few pushes of his fingers before the door does actually swing open and then his arm darts back. A second later, Mingyu gallops into view and you don't know if you want to laugh or mentally log out more.

Because gallop isn't even an inaccurate description of the way he enters. Like a child pretending to play cowboys with one of those long wooden poles with the plush horse's heads set on one end with attached reigns. You can't tell if the fact he has one of those children's toy horses makes it worse or not. You can't even admire the way his thick thighs, showcased by just the tiny pair of boxer briefs he's wearing, are pressed tight around either side of the thick wooden pole to keep it upright with both of his hands barely fitting on the tiny little loop of faux-leather that makes up the reigns.

All Mingyu is wearing are those tiny little dark boxers that don't even fully cover his asscheeks, a cowboy hat and cowboy boots. Oh, and there's some thin dark rope looped diagonally over his bare chest. That can't be good.

"Howdy partner." Mingyu starts, entirely serious in his roleplay and doing his best to put on the 'cowboy voice' you know that he and his friends have been practising together to be 'real cowboys'.

Even though you're still trying to figure out exactly how you feel about this particular roleplay choice of your boyfriend, you can't help but at least humour him. He's far too cute and sweet in general to not try, at the very least, to play along. "Howdy, cowboy," You reply, a little dumbstruck yet Mingyu lights up brightly all the same.

He wiggles slightly in excitement, forgetting himself a little in his joy, then remembers he's supposed to be a 'sexy, serious cowboy-man' and schools his expression. He doesn't even notice the amused twitch of your lips at his slip. "I'm new to town and I hear you're the person to come to when there's trouble."

"Oh, there's trouble, is there?" You hum and shuffle to sit up against the headboard. You're internally very relieved when he removes the horse and props it against the wall. It's much easier to take him seriously when he's standing there in all his ridiculously handsome glory.

"Yes, ma'am." Oh, you could get used to him saying those words in that voice, pitched slightly lower than normal and a little rough. Maybe their 'cowboy meetings' have been more successful than you've realised. Because Mingyu, nor his friends, have improved very much in the actual horse riding aspect of being a modern-day cowboy. But at least the voice is getting good.

"Sounds serious."

"It is." He steps a little closer, hands on his hips and you can't tell if it's intentional or not but it draws your eyes to his crotch in those tiny boxers leaving nothing to the imagination. Not that you need to imagine what he's packing underneath when he's always so willing to let you see, and feel, and taste. "Do you think you can help a cowboy out, ma'am?"

"Keep calling me ma'am and it sounds pretty likely." You mutter and lift your gaze back up to his face. He's smirking at you now, well aware of how much you love his body. "Tell me, what's the issue, cowboy?"

"Well, you see, it involves a certain critter," You try not to giggle at him using the term critter, you can't help it when all you can think of is the endearing way he and his friends will call any living animal or insect critter; often in a loud screech when a bug flies too close to them.

"Ooh, I see. You have a critter problem."

"That I do, ma'am."

"And a big strong cowboy like you can't handle a single critter?"

"I'm more skilled with the bigger critters."

"So this critter is small?" You wonder how many times the two of you will use the term critter, it really does not help set the mood, just amuses you honestly. This situation has already devolved in your mind and Mingyu hasn't even noticed, he's still very serious about his big-boy cowboy role-play.

"Yes," His face drops. "Wait, no! It's not." He pouts a little, barely a little protrusion of his bottom lip.

"So it's not big enough for you to handle yourself, but it's not small?" He nods and slips back into character. "How big is it exactly?"

"Big enough." You think you understand what he's trying to do here. But you're willing to let it play out at least.

"Okay, give it to me."

"Give it to you?" His eyes round out a little with the excitement those words bring him.

"I mean, tell me what it is." You correct and try not to giggle at the disappointed little oh he lets out, understanding the miscommunication there.

Though, once again, he gets right back into character and locks his serious, sultry gaze on you as the tips of his thumbs hook into the waistband of his boxers without removing his hands from his hips. "There's a snake in my pants." Yup, that's about exactly where you thought he was going with this.

"I can't believe you've defiled my childhood like that, Mingyu." You deadpan, unimpressed. His arms drop along with his expression.

"What? What did I do wrong? It's just a line!" He whines. "Wonwoo taught it to me!"

"Wonwoo?" You sigh. "Baby, what have I told you about listening to Wonwoo where sex is involved?"

"That he's wrong that sitting in the tree outside our window with binoculars isn't a natural biology lesson no matter if he takes notes." He replies in very much the tone of a man who has had those very words drilled into him many times.

"I…well yes, that is a very good one, thank you for remembering." Mingyu perks up a little at your approving response. "But that's not what I meant."

"Uhm," He thinks hard. "That he's wrong that you have to bark during doggy style." That particular memory sends shivers down your spine, you had hoped to forget it.

"Also very correct and please don't bring that up again."

"I'm sorry, I really thought he knew what he was talking about!" Mingyu defends quickly. "He's so smart, baby!"

"Uh," You don't know how to respond. Wonwoo is not smart, he may look scholarly with his glasses and cardigans when he's lounging around, but he is, like your boyfriend, just another pretty himbo. All four of the group are and you still can't tell who's the worst of them. Still, you adore the four and would never change a thing about any of them, even if their dumbassery has caused a lot of trouble since they moved to town. So you move on. "The point is, Gyu, you shouldn't listen to Wonwoo's sex advice, ever. Remember that?"

"Oh, right, yeah, you've said that before." He nods slowly in understanding, looking kind of dejectedly down at the bedframe. He looks like a scolded puppy, it pulls your heartstrings enough to want to try and salvage the situation.

"Was this whole roleplay Wonwoo's idea?" You wonder. Mingyu looks up at you and shakes his head, lips pouted cutely at you and eyes big. "Yours?"

"Yeah. And Seungcheol's. You've never told me not to take sex advice from him!"

Okay, you have to admit, Seungcheol is probably the only one from Mingyu's three besties that you think would give pretty decent sex advice, you know he at least has active ongoing experience with a friend of your own and they've always sung his praises. Wonwoo is…well nobody knows for sure if Wonwoo has ever actually had sex. He kind of gives off horny virgin energy, honestly whenever sexual conversations come up but he's always been pretty smooth when flirting so it could go either way. And the fourth of their group is precious, naive Seokmin; you know he has experience himself but he's a very sweet guy and always seems scandalised when anything out of vanilla is mentioned.

"Okay, then I'm willing to pick this back up if you really want to try it, sweetheart."

"I do!" Mingyu beams and suddenly looks as if you've offered him the world on a silver platter, drizzled in sweet syrup ready for him to slurp up. Oh, does that remind you of another one of his slightly less questionable bedroom surprises. But that's an entirely different story. "Okay, okay," Mingyu takes a few breaths to calm his visible joy, it's so cute watching him bring his hands up as he inhales deeply then turn and push them palms downwards to the floor as he exhales.

He may have some very odd ideas, but man, did you score an adorable sweetheart of a boyfriend who you hope will never change and always remain this way. You've not even been together that long, just a handful of months really, but you're pretty sure he's it for you. Your forever. The one you want to spend the rest of your life with.

When he's collected himself, he turns back to you and decides to entirely bypass the whole snake in his pants section, wisely so you think, and starts to remove the ropes from around his torso. He only knocks his hat off twice, though you barely notice because now all you can think about is the fact that it seems like you won't be the one to have to bring up bondage.

While you're wondering if your big beefy boyfriend is about to hogtie you and have his way with you, Mingyu gathers the long rope in his right hand and then takes one end into his left. It's then that you notice the very distinct large loop in one end.

Horror spreads through your body as you realise that Kim Mingyu has brought a fucking lasso into the bedroom. "Gyu-" You start in warning yet he's already pulling his arm back and launching the rope in your general direction. You yelp automatically, expecting to get hit in the face, yet it doesn't touch you. There's a loud crash on your right so you look over only to find that the only remaining one of the pair of bedside lamps is now in pieces on the hardwood flooring, the loop of Mingyu's lasso caught around the shade. It's like the balloon incident all over again. And now you have no bedside lamps, thanks to Kim Mingyu.

There's pure silence for a tense few seconds as you both stare dumbly at the mess on the floor.

Mingyu's whisper breaks the silence "Fuck." And then you burst into howling laughter. "Babe!" He whines but you can't stop, toppling over onto your side on the bed with the power of your laughs.

The whole situation has been a mess from start to finish. It's a miracle you lasted this long without some kind of breakdown. You're just glad it's the laughing kind and not the mental kind.

It takes a minute of poutily grumbling about working him hard on the scenario, learning how to tie a lasso knot and modelling endless hats and boots for his friends so they can help him pick the right ones before the humour of it all actually hits Mingyu.

It starts with a little giggle and then he looks between you and the broken lamp a few times and has to flop across the bed as he laughs along with you, uncaring that his hat falls off.

Slowly, both of you stop laughing and calm enough to look at each other. You're still grinning like fools and there are tear tracks down your cheeks from it, but you're happy. He's happy. That's all that matters.

Mingyu shuffles over to you in a manner that makes giggles bubble out of your throat until he's on his side close enough to lean in and press a soft kiss to your lips. "I love you," He informs gently when he pulls back to look adoringly into your eyes. Your expression softens and quickly melts into the mirror of his own as you brush your fingertips over his cheek.

"I love you too." You reply, smiling as he lays his hand over the back of yours to hold it in place as he turns his head to kiss your palm, planting his love right there where you can keep it safe for as long as you want to. And then he looks back at you and holds your palm to his cheek. "Just no more lassos in the bedroom,"

Mingyu laughs and nods in agreement. "No more lassos in the bedroom."

"House in general. Indoors. No lassos indoors."

"Okay, baby," He giggles and kisses you once more sweetly before getting up and picking his hat up off the mattress to plop on your head when you sit up. You adjust it so that you can watch as he crouches down beside the broken lamp to begin cleaning up the mess you made. And as you watch him, there's only one thought on your mind.

Yeah, he really is it for you.

A/N- Believe it or not, the original idea that caused this one has a much higher crack content and I may have to write that too. This story can be considered a spin-off of that, or one in the collection of the same universe focused on the 4 himbos and their adventures.

[laughhardrunfastbekindsblog]

Came across another debate about the "inhibitor chips vs. no chips" storyline for the clones. Saw the usual complaint that the inhibitor chips are a cop out to absolve the clones of any responsibility for their actions.

Thing is...

For a long time, practically none of the clones knew their actions during Order 66 were influenced by programming via implanted brain chips. Omega was the first clone who for sure knew the chips were even a thing; Tech figured it out and Rex finally understood and fully accepted Fives' claims during Order 66; the rest of Clone Force 99 eventually accepts the truth; and I'm sure Rex got through to the clones who became part of his network.

But that's a tiny fraction of the clones who make up the GAR. (We find out over a decade later in Rebels that apparently the story of the inhibitor chips had circulated, but we don't know to what extent the story spread or if it was ever validated to the general public as more than a rumor.)

So, during Order 66 and for years thereafter, the clones thought they were acting of their own accord.

We never see the clones using the chips as an excuse for their behavior, likely because most of the clones don't even know about them.

And frankly, I find it even more tragic that these loyal, honorable men thought they had freely chosen to turn on the Jedi and others who had been their allies, genuinely thought they were stopping a Jedi coup, when they really didn't have much of a choice at all, not even the option to stop and think about what they were doing before they did it.

And even those clones who DO know what's going on are too horrified by their behavior to even entertain the notion of excusing themselves.

Just look at Rex's face when he's about to shoot Ahsoka. He's conflicted, he's terrified. Rex later talks about the chip and tells the Bad Batch it's not something they can control if it activates; but even then he's sharing that to convince them to choose to remove the chips, not to give them an excuse for their behavior.

And can any of us mistake Wrecker's shame over his actions while the inhibitor chip was activated as him justifying himself? He describes what it felt like, and we know as well as he does that he literally had no control over himself, yet he still apologizes for what he did.

AND THEN we have Crosshair, Mr. "Does it really matter when I got my chip removed?" -

Crosshair knows about the chip, knows what it was supposed to do, had it removed, and still insists that he was in full control of himself and his decisions all along. Even later, when he admits to making mistakes and having regrets, he never blames the inhibitor chip for his actions.

Basically - I have no issue whatsoever with the inhibitor chip plotline. I actually prefer it. Not even taking into account the fact that it makes a ton of sense that Palpatine wouldn't leave anything regarding something as pivotal to his plans as Order 66 up to chance, the inhibitor chips add another layer of tragedy and complexity to the clones in that while we the audience know they have more of their autonomy stripped away from them, as far as the clones are aware the chips don't even exist and they are in full control of their own actions; and the clones who DO know about the chips tend to acknowledge their effects while still not using them to justify their behavior or refuse any responsibility.

[impishjesters]

Agents of Cat-astrophe

warning(s): none unless you count Jax note(s): This gave me a good chuckle as someone who's consistently dropping more curse words than regular words, I'd imagine the system to just censor anything and everything that comes out of my mouth at that point. A/N: (In response to the requester) I wish I was taking breaks (I mean I am sorta), I'm fully aware I'm running myself ragged right now. But it's hard for me to stop myself... I'm caffeinated and chaotic and I don't wanna stew in my brain for too long. At least I get up and stretch every now and then. Request: Anyways, I’m requesting a Jax x reader (crushing stage) where the reader is sorta at the same level of meanness as Jax and likes to do pranks with him on the other characters. Also the reader’s digital form is a short cat that at first glance makes them look nice/friendly (obviously not an actual cat but yk what I mean), and they have a sailor’s mouth that is unfortunately censored but that doesn’t stop them (can also purr and does so when they’re content which is usually when there chilling in Jax’s room or with Jax in general). I think it would be fun if the reader surprisingly was sorta nicer to Kinger and has a small soft spot for him and does more playful pranks on him than mean/harmful ones.

When you first showed up, you looked so small and frail, like a literal little kitten completely out of place in this big colourful nightmare world

Ragatha thought you’d be like Pomni, and boy howdy was she wrong

You just ended up being another Jax—who you later met and found out was also an agent of chaos

Similarly to Pomni you cursed up a storm when you first arrived and the endless censorship that came with it

You have a knack for testing Caine’s patience when it comes to your sailor’s mouth, much to Jax’s entertainment. It’s not every day Caine loses his cool like that and you’re just a newbie, needless to say, you caught his interest

That sailor’s mouth also gets used towards the other’s and Jax won’t lie and say it’s not funny because shit’s hilarious.

Sure they all curse from time to time, but you just laid out an entire sentence that was completely and utterly censored. Like the system said “fuck this I’m gonna censor the whole damn sentence”

Unlike Jax who doesn’t show any remorse for who he pranks or how cruel they are, you draw the line at messing with Kinger.

Okay, that’s a lie you still mess with him but it’s not like how you mess with the others. Kinger has this sweet unstable dad/grandpa vibe and it kind of makes the place more homey in a weird way. (plus that man has been through enough trauma, give him a break, and talk about his bug collections or some shit)

The upside is that his mind is so scattered sometimes that using the same pranks on him always results in something hilarious. So you really don’t need to try for any new material. (he also really needs to consider actually using the lock on his door, he makes it too easy)

Jax considered you his little partner in crime the more time passed—not exactly a friend nah, but like a good ol pal that also likes to partake in joining him and his bullshittery

The first time he hears you purring is when the two of you are lazing about in his room, he’d gotten distracted collecting things for a prank on someone and heard the loudest rumbling coming from behind him

“Are you fucking purring?”

It’s a little embarrassing at first, you’ve uh, never done that before..

Jax has the biggest shit-eating grin, if he wasn’t using dumb cat-themed nicknames before he sure as hell is now

“Oh, like you don’t stomp your feet like a petulant child you overgrown rabbit.”

He does not stomp his fuckin feet like a temperamental rabbit, thank you very much (that’s a fuckin lie if I ever heard one)

Jax already had mixed feelings about you before, nothing particularly bad, just feelings he couldn’t place…that was until the prank…

He doesn’t know how you did it, or how he got so wrapped up in it. But you pranked him, and you pranked him good.

Oh, oh okay that feeling is new… butterflies don’t typically belong inside your gut, now whether Jax has ever experienced a crush before or not is probably beyond him. But these little butterflies are a bitch and it takes awhile of placing two and two together to realize he’s… caught feelings to some degree

You, however, probably had a crush on him for a while, perhaps really noticing it after the whole purring fiasco when you learned that it only happened around Jax

[adorablebanite]

I'm new here, but have we yet talked about why Gortash coins himself "Lightbringer?"

I know "Enver" translates to "shining one" in Turkish, or something of the sort, and "Gortash" means "stone" (not sure which language, I literally googled this for 2 seconds don't come at me!)

My assumption is he rebranded himself after rising in the underworld as someone more front-facing and politics-friendly, so of course "Flymm," being associated with poverty/bad business decisions was not an option (not to mention he'd want to separate himself from his parents for obvious reasons).

The funny thing to me, is while Bane is known as "The Lord of Darkness," "The Dark One," "The Black Lord," and Gortash, his right-hand man (metaphorically and literally) essentially brands himself as a beacon of light.

Is it because it looks and sounds good politically and socially? I'm assuming so, but it also has a cheeky practical connotation to it: infernal weapons.

The Fabricated Arbalest is no doubt an infernal weapon of his own design, and that cute little fucker decided to tune these things to do radiant damage:

So not only is he presenting himself as the antithesis of darkness while simultaneously worshipping a dark god, he's dealing "light bringing" weapons of destruction in the same stroke.

Maybe he's being annoyingly poetic, as light is required to cast a shadow-if he opted in for FULL darkness, he might as well be a Sharran. But tyranny requires balance to prevail- the subjugated masses need hope to avoid fully revolting against a tyrannical leader, and toppling regimes- the best way to enact a tyrannical edict, is to convince one's subjects they love their tyranny by pretending to shield them from some terrifying threat (when in reality the true threat is tyranny). Banites know the intricacies of this delicate balance. Gortash can be that hope- he can be the light that reminds the subjugated he's the one to guide them through the darkness.

It highlights his meglomaniacal and duplicitous nature.

He's also paradoxical in nature, because not only is he completely self aware of his own intentional deception, but he also appears to fully subscribe to his own intentions as the correct way to resolve the world's problems.

I don't even think the "Lightbringer" title is supposed to be in the spirit of trickery- he's being literal and sincere when he calls himself such.

I wouldn't even doubt that with his penchant for technology, he would quite literally seek to "bring light" to Faerún. How long has Baldur's Gate been using candles and torches? Why haven't they progressed passed that since...forever?? When you look at the Iron Throne, it has actual lights- not flame!

I don't doubt he honestly planned on progressing Faerún into a technological age that has drastically been held back by what he sees as inefficiencies in leadership, and a lack of unity. In his own fucked up way, he wanted to jumpstart the evolution of technology - not particularly for altruistic reasons, but because he knew he could.

I hate him very very affectionately.

[euphoricsleeplucidity]

So I saw some Oilrose art, and got a writing idea, but I'm not sure if I should post something based on someone's art? If I should take this down, please let me know. Idk social media etiquette, yet. ;-; Anyway, it's not a script this time but it's still kind of lazy. Enjoy!

V was overheating. She's fully aware of that, she needs oil, and she needs it bad. So why is she stumbling back to the corpse spire? Why is she not hunting, even though that 'core temps too high' warning keeps popping up on her hud and her systems are slowly beginning to fail, her internal fans forced to whir to life in a futile effort to cool her systems?

She feels so dizzy. Honestly, that shouldn't even be possible for a drone, but it certainly feels that way. The world is spinning as she walks, steam literally emitting from her heated body, it's a wonder that the snow below doesn't melt.

Yet, she perseveres and makes it to the spire.

Ah. There's the reason she returned, anyway. She tries to stand up tall in front of her leader, but it's too much of a pain to bother and she just continues to slump. Averts her yellow eyes, even as J's questioning ones pierce through her.

"V? What are you doing," it's more a demand than a question. J steps forward, close enough to feel the heat emitting from the overheated disassembler. If V was any dumber, she'd think that her leader stepped this close on purpose.

"I dunno," slurs V, looking up at her leader and smiling lazily. "Since last time, someone got handsy, fig-figured you'd. Y'know."

A dim yellow blush lights up the bottom of J's visor. V can see the conflict, the need to step back vs the want to be closer.

Yeah. V returned on purpose.

If the only way to convince J to be so close was letting herself overheat?

Well, it's a small price to pay.

And V figures she knows why. The warmth, so unlike the usual coolness of their bodies, it reminds J of... Tessa, doesn't it? So it's not even like her leader actually cares about her in the way she wants, anyway, never will. But it's something. And damnit, V was willing to take what she can get.

J never steps back. No, she comes closer, and without further hesitation, wraps her arms around her subordinate. V startles despite expecting it, but quickly relaxes, her traitorous tail wagging behind herself. She returns the hug, placing her hands on J's back, and her leader sighs in contentment, as does V.

They don't exchange words.

V is content with this.

J will never like her back, but at least she has this.

Little does she know, J smiles, but not because she's remembering Tessa's warmth this time.

If the only way to convince V to be so close was letting her overheat?

Well, it's a small price to pay.

Though, lacking in efficiency.

She doesn't know why V is doing this.

But, well. They have extra oil lying around the spire, anyway.

J's hands cling tighter to V's back.

Stop hurting yourself for me, you idiot.

But those words never come.

[3hks]

Key Components in Creating THAT Character

If you read a lot or enjoy television and interact with the fandoms, you quickly realize that there are certain characters that have fans COMPLETELY wrapped around their finger! And furthermore, they usually end up pretty iconic even though they aren't the main character! (People like Gojo Satoru, Levi Ackerman, Killua Zoldyck--I watch too much anime but hopefully you get the point) So how do they become so popular? Do YOU want to create a character along those lines?

Perfect! Because this guide will have literally everything you need! (Keep in mind that some things will get very specific and there's no need to follow absolutely everything!)

1. Confidence

It doesn't matter if the confidence is a facade or if your character is genuinely confident--readers LOVE a confident character! This is because confidence can establish reliability, easily capturing the audience.

2. Status

Following confidence, it's important that your character has status. I'm not necessarily talking about royalty and whatnot, but if you look at my first three examples (assuming that you know who they are), they all carry a title and are known.

Gojo Satoru: The Strongest Sorcerer

Levi Ackerman: Humanity's Strongest Soldier

Killua Zoldyck: He's a Zoldyck

Again, this creates a sense of reliability and that awareness that your character is someone important.

3. Reputation

Alright, so this character now has confidence and status, so therefore, they also need some kind of a reputation! Consider some of the following questions: Does the public have an opinion on them? If so, what is the general viewpoint? What about the people close your character? Are their opinions accurate to your character's actual personality?

The truth is their reputation doesn't have to reliably reflect them. What the readers see in your character versus the others in the story can be vastly different. So, with these types of characters, it's important to establish a perspective of them that's separate from the audience's!

Now, what does this even do? A reputation builds onto status because it shows that, again, this character is someone who genuinely matters not just to the story itself, but to the actual verse. It also offers a lot of indirect characterization because it demonstrates how they are seen!

I would consider the first three to be the surface level traits, which is not a bad thing at all! However, with these next few points, we're going to dig deeper!

4. Empathy/Sympathy

Yes, yes, I'm well aware that empathy and sympathy are completely separate concepts, but either one will work for what I'm about to talk about next!

Vulnerabilities and flaws are critical to any realistic and quality character.

However, it's important to keep in mind that for THIS type of character, specifically, is meant to be established as someone with status and thus, won't easily show their weaknesses.

When boiled down, treat your readers like all another character.

Don't shove your character's fragilities into your audience's face because that can ruin everything you built up in steps one through three. Instead, leave their weaknesses (not necessarily flaws, they can be revealed however you like) slightly vaguer than you might normally. Let it be up for interpretation!

A simple way to achieve this is to dive into their past and let their old selves speak for themselves!

5. Situation

Great, so now you have the flaws and rough imperfections of your character down! What do you do with them?

Put your character in a situation with something on the line that exposes their vulnerabilities and forces them to confront their issues. Allow your readers to see their flaws physically in action because that's one of the best ways to fully elaborate on their character.

Additionally, if you're looking to flesh them out or generate more emotion, this will achieve that! With these characters, they NEED their time in your story.

6. Development

Just like all characters, the fundamentals still apply, and this character is no exception to development! If you're not too sure about what changes to make, start with step 5 and continue from there! There is no need to make a drastic difference, a simple realization or small alteration will do!

CONCLUSION

Alright, let's wrap this up! Steps 1-3 are the basis to creating your character's personality! It gives the impression that they are important and have a reputation. Steps 4-6 are mainly for development and to create a more dimensional character; but the main takeaway is that any weaknesses should not be downright stated but instead hinted at!

Happy September and happy writing~

3hks <3

[judasgot-it]

Dad! Jouno headcanons...

He just looks like a stressed as hell father here. Someone help him.

Before ->

To be totally honest, I don't think Jouno would ever plan to be a father. He would never plan to be one simply because he is completely aware of how horrible of a person he is

Why would he bring someone into the world who could be exactly like him? Or worse, he would end up being a horrible parent?

He would just avoid any topic about it.

So parenthood is 100% an accident. Also, this guy would probably try to convince his gf to get an abortion at some point, cause he probably thinks he would make a child that's just that horrible

I feel like the best chance of him becoming a parent would be him not knowing about it when he got arrested and was forced into being a hunting dog. Can't tell your gf to abort when you're in jail ig. Also now he is legally obligated to pay child support. GOTTEM!

Personal theory tho.

He probably wouldn't be jumping for joy at the thought of parenthood tbh. If anything, he is freaking out. I feel like he's in between denial and freaking out. Probably gave some weird rant about the government.

During pregnancy ->

If he's miraculously there (I think the last part is more plausible. This would be his #felonera) then he would be stressed as hell

Dude knows that it's inevitable (unless he throws her down the stairs. or smothers the baby. He probably thinks some weird shit it's Jouno sorry) so now he has to prepare for a very near future of being a father

He can't have sex for what might be the next few years. He has to learn how to take care of a baby. He's made Tecchou-like food combo's now. His life is hell.

Jouno I think would only be dramatic for a month and then get over it quickly -> he has two people relying on him now. Even past his kid being born, he will inevitably have to take care of his baby mom for a while after and will have to provide. Like a dad.

He probably loves the attention and the title it gives him. Probably starts owning it and is thinking 'yeah, actually, I'm going to be an awesome dad' because he gets brownie points for doing the bare minimum as a man

Dude would be kinda ridiculous and do lots of shit just so he can get praise. He's going to be a great dad, so yea, ofc he's going to buy weird useless shit no one would actually use. It's what good dad's do (he's not even pregnant and is suffering from baby brain I think)

Is probably terrified of touching his gf because he is more than aware that his child is in there and it unnerves him. Probably is super freakish about the most random shit, like drinking coffee or going up and down stairs since he can hear whats going on.

His normal level of anxiety goes through the roof during this time. I feel like they won't ever go back down again.

During the birth he would probably be supportive although I think the sounds and smells would be so horrific for him that he would vomit and be kicked out by nursing staff

I feel like the birth was so bad for him to hear (sensitive hearing would be terrible. and smell) that he would be crying as if he pushed a baby out of his hole

Raising that Child (early years) ->

The early years are the worst for him. He still is in a stage between "I want to be a good dad" and "I'm a horrible person I literally have fucking killed people. He doesn't know I have killed people and enjoyed it"

Would have this crisis with a literal baby btw. Probably has full on very serious conversations with his kid about morality when his kid still drinks from the tit

I don't think he'd enjoy being around his kid fully until he starts actually forming full thoughts. Obviously, he loves him, but he enjoys weird kid questions much more than a baby who shits himself

Eggs him on too, tries to make him think until his brain hurts. He thinks it's funny, making a seven-year-old wrap his head around the concept of global shipping and LLCs.

He wouldn't give his kid normal child entertainment. It's all educational and weird shit. Also is very picky about their toys, he's basically a beige mom but its about noises and smells. NEVER give his kid something like slime, he'll go insane.

I think he's 100% the 'bad cop' parent because he would have a lot of rules that a little kid wouldn't get. I feel like the other Hunting Dogs would get on his ass about it

I think Jouno probably worries a lot about giving his kid a good childhood since I doubt his was good - he was alive during the great war as a kid, he turned into a criminal, and he's an ability user. not the best circumstances.

100% has been forced to bring his kid to his job, but he doesn't actually introduce him to any of his actual duties. Torturing? He can't know about that.

Jouno lets his kid hang out with his colleagues -> probably Tachihara, who I think would play the best 'uncle' role out of all of them

Later years ->

Personally, I think Jouno would have a son, but I don't think its a curse. I think it would actually be a sort of blessing, because Jouno was probably a lot nicer of a person before whatever fucked up shit happened that made him the way he is now.

Mentioning this cause I think his son would probably be a direct reflection of who he could have been -> more happy and carefree, and less on the offensive about everything

So when his kid gets older, Jouno is probably some weird guy who tries to tell his kid everything he 'wished he knew at that age'

Probably got his son to have a sex talk from one of the hunting dogs doctors. it was a traumatic bonding experience for the both of them.

He definitely fake kidnapped his kid like 3 times in case something happened. Jouno is a super soldier, but his son is not. He needs to learn how to stab people.

Gave his son a gun/knife. Insists he brings it school, no he does not care if it's against the rules - he literally is the law. His son is also a target, so it is necessary in his eyes.

God please someone stop him he thinks someone is going to murder his son every second of every day

I'm pretty sure his son is some dweeb that Jouno is almost jealous of - like he never got the opportunity to be a dork who cries about homework. he was too busy killing people in his gang at that age

Jouno definitely drops the most insane dad lore. "I killed werewolves in Kenya once" while in the middle of a PTA meeting

Worst PTA mom btw. He WILL interrogate his sons teachers and pull up their records, he is the worst parent. He really shouldn't be allowed there actually

Is a lot nicer to his kid when his son is older.

He isn't his 'best friend' but he tries to do everything he can to be a good dad -> he lives everyday thinking that it'd be his last one with his family, so he tries not to leave with a bad impression

Jouno probably lies awake at night with the thought of what his last words could be to his family

The bitchy teen years would be the worst cause Jouno would probably have the best comebacks, so any sort of argument would be shot down immediately.

i dont think he lets arguments fly at dinner. If he's even there. He would be very busy, so I think his schedule would be erratic. Although I think his son would be the same and stay up at 3 am and get a lecture from him

The hunting dogs all try to teach his son about basic things like shooting and self-defense -> Teruko definitely shot at him once or twice so he knows how to avoid an assassination attempt.

Was actually really proud that his son graduated from school and is a relatively normal member of society. He never even killed someone, that's a high achievement!

[comically-callous]

JESUS!!!! Y'all ask, I deliver I guess 😟

Rainy walks Home

Hobie brown x reader! Read part 1 here!

Warnings: Mild swearing, mentions of a breakup, reader gets robbed at gunpoint 💀

A/n: PART THREE HAS BEEN MADE. Didn't anticipate you guys wanting this so bad lol. But, I'm not complaining. Requests are open!

In hindsight, agreeing to close up alone was probably a bad idea.

You locked the doors to the Domino's that you worked at behind you, pulling at the door handle to make sure it was shut tight. Suddenly, literally out of nowhere, it began raining.

You sighed, cursing under your breath as you pulled your hood over your head.

It had been a little over 3 weeks since your ex broke up with you and things were going... Fine. You weren't super torn up over the breakup, but you definitely weren't happy either.

The rain began to pour down, only getting worse with every step that you took. Normally, you wouldn't take shortcuts. There wasn't really a reason to since the walk from work to your apartment wasn't that long. But, today was an acception. It was dark, and cold, and pouring down rain.

So, you turned down an alleyway.

You walked through the narrow space, listening to the sound of your sneakers as they hit the wet pavement. But, something made you stop.

You strained your ears listening for something. You didn't quite know what.

Nothing.

You continued walking, only taking a few steps before stopping again.

You heard it this time.

Someone else's footsteps.

You turned around to face whoever was behind you, but before you could fully face them, you were grabbed.

Instinctively, you screamed and began to thrash around in the person's grasp, but they were bigger than you.

"Empty your pockets." The deep voice of a man said into your ear. You tried kicking at the man and he didn't even react. "EMPTY YOUR FUCKING POCKETS." He screamed. You reached into your pockets and threw your belongings on to the ground. Your keys and your earbuds.

The man briefly looked at the items before throwing you to the ground. Before you could even think to get up and run, he was holding a gun, pouting it at you.

You screamed and shrunk into yourself, holding your hands over your face.

"Give me your bag."

You didn't need to be told twice. You were shrugging away your bag, ready to hand over whatever this dude asked for when you heard a sort of "thwip!" sound.

You lifted your head and all you saw was a flash of red and blue full force swinging into the man who was robbing you.

You watched in awe as THE actual fucking Spiderman beat down the man who'd tried to rob you. In a manner of seconds, Spiderman had knocked the man out and tied him up in webs.

You were in shock and couldn't do anything but stare with your jaw agape. Spiderman turned to you and crouched down to your level.

"Y'alright, mate?" He asked.

You blinked. "Fucking no!"

"Yeah, fair enough." He shrugged. "Let's get you up then." He held his hand out to you and, after a short pause, you took it. He pulled you up from the ground with what seemed to be zero effort and dusted off your shoulders.

"Cops will probably show up to take care of this one sooner or later." He crossed his arms and inspected you for a moment.

You became aware of the fact that you hadn't thanked him yet. "Thank you." You said, finally calmed down from the whole ordeal.

"Nah, don't mention it." He brushed you off. "Just doing what's right."

You silently picked your things up from the ground, trying to ignore the thief that was knocked out a few feet away from you.

"Want me to walk you home?" He asked.

You paused, letting his words sink in for a moment. Spiderman was offering to walk you home.

...

Why?

"You probably have better things to do." You said, shaking your head.

"Not really. People are less likely to go around committing crime when it's pouring down rain." He shrugged his shoulders. "Besides, I wouldn't be much of a gentleman if I didn't put the offer out there."

You thought over it for a moment. You would undoubtedly feel safer if Spiderman was walking you home.

"Okay." You agreed.

You were walking down the streets with Spiderman. You were with Spiderman. Walking to your apartment. Cool. Yup. This was fine. Totally normal situation.

"Sucks that this all happened in the rain, huh?"

You broke out of your own thoughts and managed a chuckle. "Yeah, I guess."

"I would offer you an umbrella, but," He motioned down to himself. "Spiderman doesn't carry around umbrellas."

"It's okay." You went quiet again, getting lost in your thoughts. He seemed to notice the trance-like state you were in and tilted his head.

"What's on your mind?" He asked.

You took a moment before answering. For some reason, you sort of wanted to be honest with him, really tell him what was on your mind. Maybe because you knew you'd probably never talk to him again; and you knew Spiderman wasn't gonna go swinging around, telling everyone your business. So, you spoke.

"I got broken up with a couple weeks ago."

"You're still hung up about it?!" He asked. The way he said it was strange. It was like he was expecting you to be over your break up, despite the fact that the two of you had never spoken before, so he shouldn't have any reason to expect better from you.

"I mean, I'm sort of over it. But..." You sighed. "When it first happened I was upset, obviously. He broke up with me over text while I was at work and I went on break to cry in the parking lot." He nodded along. "And then this... Guy showed up." This was the main thing that had been on your mind. "And I didn't know him, but he like... Comforted me. Just sort of made me feel better about the whole thing. He was super cool, and genuine, and like, really hot; and I regret not asking for his number or anything."

There it was. You had just spilled your guts to fucking Spiderman. God, you needed to go back to therapy.

You waited for him to say something in reply, and for a moment he was silent.

"Well, uh..." He trailed off. Oh god, you'd overstepped. He probably thinks you're weird. "That's what you were thinking about?" He asked.

"Yeah. It's weird, I know."

"Nah, nah. I'm sure he's been thinking about you too."

"Definitely not." You chuckled.

"You never know." He said. "You seem cool, so..."

You stopped walking, finally arriving to your apartment building. You decided to be a little more weird by asking for advice.

"So, what should I do? Like, should I look for him somewhere? Should I just move on like a normal person?"

He paused. "When's your next shift?" He asked.

"Wednesday." You answered.

"I'd say just... Go into work. Y'know, like any other day. He might show up."

You chuckled. "That's wishful thinking."

"Not from me, it's not. You know why?"

"Why?"

"Cause I've got Spidey senses." He said. The eyes on his mask narrowed and you could tell that underneath, he was smiling.

You shook your head, smiling as well. "Guess it'd be dumb to not take Spiderman's advice."

"Exactly. So, you'll do what I said?"

"Yeah." You shrugged. "I guess I will."

"Great." He began to walk backwards away from you, not yet breaking eye contact. "I'll see you around, yeah?"

You furrowed your brows in slight confusion. "I mean, probably not."

"Y'never know." Webs shot out from his wrist and he swung away without another word.

You walked into your apartment building, and somehow you were glad you'd taken that shortcut.

[torialefay]

Hi! I always love the way you ellaborate things in detail. Can you also describe how lee know is like when he get jealous? Will he get extremely possesive when it comes to his lover?

thank you so much for your kind words!!! ❤️ that means the world to me.

here's the thing about lee know: i think deeeep down, he has a need for his freedom. he UNDERSTANDS freedom and he values freedom. but in relationships, he just can't fucking do it (and it's probably hell for him).

i say this because:

#1 his moon in sag. it's all about freedom and being able to be adventurous and explore. it's tied to who he is emotionally. at his core, he understands this and HE needs this. he needs his freedoms, and he doesn't alwayssss want to feel like he's being tied down. but that doesn't necessarily mean that's what he wants for you... even if he does understand HOW you could be like that, it doesn't mean he's okay with it.

#2 his mars in virgo. he knows how to be direct and get shit done. he is going to be practical in the way that he does things. so it's not like he's lost in his head about all of this. he is fully aware of what he's doing. what is he doing exactly? well.....

#3 his sun, mercury, AND venus in scorpio. we first have to look at the characteristics of scorp. obviously known to be deep and emotional. they have desires that they often lock away, but can open up for the right person. and in the end, that's all they want. someone who can be there to UNDERSTAND them. but since scorpio knows what it's like to feel so deeply, it can lead them to hide things for others. it can also lead them to manipulate others. they will want to know every little thing about you. and you can bet your ass they will use that to their advantage. they know how you'll react, and that makes it 10x better.... and the fact that they "know you so well" makes them extremely possessive of you. to the point that they can definitely become jealous if they think you are getting too close to anyone else.

sun: it's gonna shine through in his personality. at least he doesn't outright hide it... well, most of it, at least. you just don't know how deep it goes. but he will very much make it known in everyday life that he wants you to only be his by his everyday actions.

mercury: he will tell you exactly what you want to hear (when he wants you to do something) OR he will tell you something that he knows will completely devastate you (to basically use it against you to do what he wants). and the thing is, he may not even be cognizant in the fact that he's doing this. it's just inherent.

venus: he's a lovesick lover boy who can get possessive and obsessive under the right corcumstances. if he knows the most intimate parts of you, he can feel like he has some sort of "claim" to you. he literally feeds into these delusions bc deep down, scorpios really want that deeeeep emotional connection, but they dont necessarily feel comfortable offerring up their own selves... that's why they need you to fulfil it.

long story short, lee know is very much possessive in relationships, but it is inherent in him. he quite literally doesn't know any other way. BUT there is conflict with his moon, so it does try to put it at a hault sometimes and keep him in check... but at the end of the day, actions beat out intentions.

"you are not going there dressed like that baby. wear it for me instead."

"i didn't think you'd be the type to want to do that... i mean, i didn't think you'd be into that scene."

"you're meant for me. only me. do you understand that?"

"see baby, that's why you need to stay with me. nothing bad will happen to you as long as i'm around, okay?"

[simplyreveries]

I've never submitted anything before so I apologize if this is incorrect, but I just really really love your writing and wanted to request somthing! Would a Riddle, Jamil and Idia with an autistic reader who likes bright lights to calm them be ok?

I dont know if I did this correctly, if I'm incorrect or you just don't want to write this one I totally get it if you ignore it/gen

Have a great day!

hope this is alright<3

riddle rosehearts

he’d get one in his room, so if you are particularly feeling overwhelmed or anything you can just go there, as dorm leader he doesn't share with anyone or anything like that so it's completely calming. if you're okay he’ll just be with you in quiet doing his own work if that's what you’d prefer. he is very understanding about it even if he doesn't experience such himself, he tries to be as calming as he can be to you.

the last thing he’d want is you feeling distressed and bad, he would go out of his way to make sure you’ll always have some sort of access to one especially within the dorm—much to his dismay, he is well aware of how chaotic it can get sometimes usually it being something ace or deuce did.

riddle loves the way the light shines on you, he thinks you look so lovely around them, even more so with a content expression on your face. the fact that he can help that to help you feel all the better is really encouraging to him.

jamil viper

if you look in his room, you’ll see various lights like on his desk or lantern-like lights hanging on his ceiling. he noticed you always seemed drawn to them whenever you're over at scarabia and in his room, he didn't fully understand why— as it took him a moment for him to realize that you like them so much, that it helps you ease yourself.

jamil wants to be able to help you feel calmed down he'll gladly share and show you various ones- even if that means walking through campus during the late hours to see them all over the place like the library for example. he'd always hum and nod telling you he finds them pretty too, but he really is just gazing at you.

he wants to take you to his hometown, scalding sands, because a night, it lights up so amazingly. (look at his silk adorned card!!!) there are plenty he can show you as you look around, he wants to see your face light up at all the different kinds of various traditional lights and such.

idia shroud

even with the lights off in his room, truthfully i don't think idia even likes complete darkness so there's usually some night light or the illumination and light coming from his technology within his room. you could easily be drawn to it whenever you're over. he’ll even have a light right by his bed just for you if you’d like.

i bet you 100% you don't even have to ask he would quite literally make you some customize able one. it'll represent something you like (like an animal, plant or something!), you can adjust the brightness, and even change the colors... he will go all out on it and be super nervous but idia turns a quick 180 to a proud and confident demeanor when you seem excited about it. he'll proceed to ramble and tell you every little thing that he designed it to do for you do. he'll slowly start ordering online and adding more to his room.. and yours in ramshackle, lord knows there's not many working lights in there. he wants you to feel comfortable.

though he was nervous and completely against performing for the "wish upon a star" event, knowing and seeing just how happy you were to see all the star decorations lit up around the tree did give him a small sense of ease when performing.

[leidensygdom]

Ok, I'm gonna start a post idea I had been pondering. If you're either mentally or physically disabled and you have opinions about representation, this is the thread for you!

So, I've been seeing more people trying to tackle the topic of autism in their stories, but I've felt some of it tries to woobify a bit what is to live with autism, or just focus on the more socially acceptable quirks of it. And as someone with autism/ADHD (was suspected of it for most of my life, got it finally diagnosed by my therapist (who specializes in autism and ADHD) last year), sometimes I'd like for people to acknowledge the more unsavoury parts of it, the weird quirks, etc.

So, this post is going to be about that- If you wanna help people understand how your disability/neurodivergency affects your life, feel free to add to it! Just mention what do you have (no need for a full list, just what you consider relevant to the post) and some experiences, quirks, anecdotes or such that you think that are not often seen in stories or media, and that you consider an important part of it. They don't need to be huge things! I encourage people to share just whatever they feel comfortable. My list is gonna be a mix of stuff, but yours can be very different. Let me start!

Clothes and how they feel was surprisingly one of the most disruptive parts of my autism. As a kid, if I was forced to wear something that caused me some bad texture/sensitivity issues, it would significantly affect my behaviour and performance. It took me many years to be allowed to use mostly sportswear. (And it turns out being a "girl" (not anymore) wearing only sportswear tends to cause a whole lot of bullying)

This happens even nowadays. I've found out that non-heeled boots are more comfortable to me than sport shoes, because feeling something against the back of my foot makes me feel overwhelmed. I tend to wear yoga pants under actual pants, because they keep the actual pants' seams from causing sensory issues. There's almost a sort of ritual on how do I need to combine clothes to be able to function "normally", mostly consisting on reducing how much they annoy me.

On that topic, hygiene is actually a huge thing too. As a kid, I wasn't allowed to shower daily. Days I didn't shower, no matter how much I tried to keep my hygiene in other days, were "bad days" to me. I would literally plan hanging out with friends or eating out around the days I was allowed to shower. I could physically feel the difference between the day I showered and the day I didn't (even if I washed my face, armpits, used the bidet, etc).

This is true even nowadays. I can thankfully now shower daily, which isn't recommended by a lot of experts (specially because it can damage your hair and skin), but it's more worth to me than having days where I feel like I shouldn't be seen in public.

Being overwhelmed sucks! Meltdowns are mostly associated with kids, mostly because adults either learn to mask them, or do everything they can to AVOID having that meltdown. I've mostly figured out routines and such. There's this one place we go eat out every other Tuesday- And in the hours we go in, there's a sort of silent corner that is always free. This week's schedule was a mess, so we went yesterday to that same place, and the silent corner was filled with a very loud group. I got extremely overwhelmed. But enough masking drilled to me means I just sat there unable to talk for maybe 30 minutes.

Autistic adults still do have autism and experience often the full spread of traits, they've just found ways to mask, or avoid being in situations where they do need to do that. I've adapted my life and routine to that. But sometimes I land on situations out of my comfort zone that will make me feel just like when I was a kid. I want to freelance online because I'm fully aware I can't perform properly in a public facing job.

Group projects sucked so much. I know they suck for most people, but most times it was easier for me to do the entirety of the project by myself and add the others' names to it than dealing with chasing people for their parts. My college had a 6-months-long massive group project in the last year, with a 7 people group, which obviously I couldn't do alone. The whole experience was so harmful in so many ways I've had several full therapy sessions talking about it :'')

One of the reasons it's because mental flexibility is HARD with autism. If i set a schedule, I expect that schedule to be followed. If people agree to do a part, I expect that part to be delivered (unless there's a proper reason) on due time. People hate this a lot usually! It will tear group projects apart!

Stimming can be harmless, or it can be very annoying to some. I tend to shake legs and play with something in my hands. I could easy this off drawing in classes- My high school found out that I was paying more attention when I was allowed to draw in classes, and my academic performance was pretty much perfect, so they gave me permission to do that.

However, I had a teacher in middle school that did forbid me from drawing. I stimmed during a class with pens- She got so mad she sent me home with a note to my parents they had to sign. Fun!

Not exactly an anecdote, but I am ace. I hate the discourse about "making an autistic person be aro or ace is infantilizing autism". Aro/ace people can have autism. That's just how it is. I've been infantilized a lot for being ace- Which only got worse because I am autistic, and people perceived some of my special interests as child-ish. The combo didn't make things easy.

On that topic, people will often be very patronizing of your opinions or takes for being autistic. I've had people debate my sexuality (or lack of thereof), my gender identity and presentation, my hobbies, my preferences for everything, down to "what do you want to eat tonight?". This isn't too different to shitty takes about how "autistic people are more prone to being affected by the trans activistsTM", because people assume autistic people can't choose on their own. Trust me: We can.

Anyhow, I'd love if this post could be a good compilation of these sort of anecdotes! I think it could help people who wanna learn more about what is it to live with specific disabilities (and how to better portray them in media)