#and I was doing so well last week
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Migraine's been bad this week, but particularly bad in the last day. bette rnow at least, but was miserable most of the day.
work this week? none so far. hoping this clears up for SOME work tomorrow.
#and I was doing so well last week#personal#and my internet's been spotty this week and i was trying to troubleshoot wifi/vpn and its a local outage issue
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It's just guys night talk! Don't worry about it!
(Read Tiger Tiger and shake this man awake so he can finish that thought!)
#tiger tiger#remy bonnaire#jamis arlesi#Comics I meant to post a week ago but I have been...extraordinarily sleepy.#Remy is the ultimate yearner and he is about to explode...these last few updates have had the Tigers discord in a vice grip.#We all knew he was going to say something that would devestate Remy.#But this??? This near confession? “I wish you would look at me like that?”#If I was Remy...well yeah I probably would also just lay in bed. Awake. Pondering and internally exploding.#But ough...the agony...his heart had settled on loving this man from afar and now...now he wonders. If it doesn't have to be so.#The boys are fighting (internally and with themselves).#If you haven't red Tigers yet but are reading this: What else must I do to convince you? Draw more men's tits?#God! If I must [I shake my head at an empty audience] I can't believe I'm being forced to do this!
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the thing about art is that it was always supposed to be about us, about the human-ness of us, the impossible and beautiful reality that we (for centuries) have stood still, transfixed by music. that we can close our eyes and cry about the same book passage; the events of which aren't real and never happened. theatre in shakespeare's time was as real as it is now; we all laugh at the same cue (pursued by bear), separated hundreds of years apart.
three years ago my housemates were jamming outdoors, just messing around with their instruments, mostly just making noise. our neighbors - shy, cautious, a little sheepish - sat down and started playing. i don't really know how it happened; i was somehow in charge of dancing, barefoot and laughing - but i looked up, and our yard was full of people. kids stacked on the shoulders of parents. old couples holding hands. someone had brought sidewalk chalk; our front walk became a riot of color. someone ran in with a flute and played the most astounding solo i've ever heard in my life, upright and wiggling, skipping as she did so. she only paused because the violin player was kicking his heels up and she was laughing too hard to continue.
two weeks ago my friend and i met in the basement of her apartment complex so she could work out a piece of choreography. we have a language barrier - i'm not as good at ASL as i'd like to be (i'm still learning!) so we communicate mostly through the notes app and this strange secret language of dancers - we have the same movement vocabulary. the two of us cracking jokes at each other, giggling. there were kids in the basement too, who had been playing soccer until we took up the far corner of the room. one by one they made their slow way over like feral cats - they laid down, belly-flat against the floor, just watching. my friend and i were not in tutus - we were in slouchy shirts and leggings and socks. nothing fancy. but when i asked the kids would you like to dance too? they were immediately on their feet and spinning. i love when people dance with abandon, the wild and leggy fervor of childhood. i think it is gorgeous.
their adults showed up eventually, and a few of them said hey, let's not bother the nice ladies. but they weren't bothering us, they were just having fun - so. a few of the adults started dancing awkwardly along, and then most of the adults. someone brought down a better sound system. someone opened a watermelon and started handing out slices. it was 8 PM on a tuesday and nothing about that day was particularly special; we might as well party.
one time i hosted a free "paint along party" and about 20 adults worked quietly while i taught them how to paint nessie. one time i taught community dance classes and so many people showed up we had to move the whole thing outside. we used chairs and coatracks to balance. one time i showed up to a random band playing in a random location, and the whole thing got packed so quickly we had to open every door and window in the place.
i don't think i can tell you how much people want to be making art and engaging with art. they want to, desperately. so many people would be stunning artists, but they are lied to and told from a very young age that art only matters if it is planned, purposeful, beautiful. that if you have an idea, you need to be able to express it perfectly. this is not true. you don't get only 1 chance to communicate. you can spend a lifetime trying to display exactly 1 thing you can never quite language. you can just express the "!!??!!!"-ing-ness of being alive; that is something none of us really have a full grasp on creating. and even when we can't make what we want - god, it feels fucking good to try. and even just enjoying other artists - art inherently rewards the act of participating.
i wasn't raised wealthy. whenever i make a post about art, someone inevitably says something along the lines of well some of us aren't that lucky. i am not lucky; i am dedicated. i have a chronic condition, my hands are constantly in pain. i am not neurotypical, nor was i raised safe. i worked 5-7 jobs while some of these memories happened. i chose art because it mattered to me more than anything on this fucking planet - i would work 80 hours a week just so i could afford to write in 3 of them.
and i am still telling you - if you are called to make art, you are called to the part of you that is human. you do not have to be good at it. you do not have to have enormous amounts of privilege. you can just... give yourself permission. you can just say i'm going to make something now and then - go out and make it. raquel it won't be good though that is okay, i don't make good things every time either. besides. who decides what good even is?
you weren't called to make something because you wanted it to be good, you were called to make something because it is a basic instinct. you were taught to judge its worth and over-value perfection. you are doing something impossible. a god's ability: from nothing springs creation.
a few months ago i found a piece of sidewalk chalk and started drawing. within an hour i had somehow collected a small classroom of young children. their adults often brought their own chalk. i looked up and about fifteen families had joined me from around the block. we drew scrangly unicorns and messed up flowers and one girl asked me to draw charizard. i am not good at drawing. i basically drew an orb with wings. you would have thought i drew her the mona lisa. she dragged her mother over and pointed and said look! look what she drew for me and, in the moment, i admit i flinched (sorry, i don't -). but the mother just grinned at me. he's beautiful. and then she sat down and started drawing.
someone took a picture of it. it was in the local newspaper. the summary underneath said joyful and spontaneous artwork from local artists springs up in public gallery. in the picture, a little girl covered in chalk dust has her head thrown back, delighted. laughing.
#writeblr#warm up#this is longer than i wanted i really considered removing that part about myself and what i went thru#but i think it really fucking bothers me that EVERY time i talk about being an artist#ppl assume i just like. had the skill and ability to drop everything and pay for grad school.#like sir i grew up poor. my house wasn't a safe space. i gave up a FREE RIDE TO LAW SCHOOL. for THIS. bc i chose it.#was it fucking hard? was i choosing the hard thing?? yes.#but we need to stop seeing artists as lazy layabouts that can ''afford'' to just ''sit around and create''#when MANY - if not MOST - of us are NOT like that. we have to work our fucking ASSES off. hard work. long and hard work#part of valuing artists is recognizing the amount we sacrifice to make our art. bc it doesn't just#like HAPPEN to us. also btw it rarely has anything to do with true talent.#speaking as someone with a chronic condition i hate when ppl are like u have it easy. like actively as i'm writing this my hands r#ACTIVELY hurting me. i haven't been posting bc my left hand was curled in a claw for the last week#this isn't fucking luck. after a certain point it's not even TALENT. it's dedication & sacrifice.#''u get to flounce around and do nothing with ur life'' is a narrative that is a direct result of capitalism#imagine if we said that about literally any other profession.#''oh so u give up 10 yrs of ur life to be a doctor? u sacrifice having a social life and u get SUPER in debt?#u need to work countless hours and it will often be thankless? well i wish i was that lucky''#we should be applying that logic to landlords ONLY#''oh ur mom and dad gave u the money to buy a house? and all u did was paint it white and rent it? huh.''
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sorry i stopped posting, i got medicated and also engaged
#also i work 6 days a week and am in grad school#in case you ever wondered what happened to that person you used to follow#people on twitter thought i was dead#not dead! just happy#turns out i’m someone who needs to live a mostly offline life#highly recommend!!#not art#probably my last post ever so see ya#my fiance is a really great person they’ve been my best friend for twice as long as we’ve been together#they’re very private but i’m obsessed with them#really recommend finding someone who makes you incredibly happy#genuinely hope everyone is doing well!! or as well as you can be haha
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finally completed my comic based on the song ivy by taylor swift!✿ please zoom in to read the text and see the details~
✿.✿.✿
you can get the digital zine pdf here! it includes extras like character profiles, costume design, more art of willow and ivy, zine-exclusive sketches and an illustrated guide to the symbolism of all the flowers in this comic.
you can also get prints of individual pages here!
✿.✿.✿
#ivy comic#it's finally complete!!!♡ this was the longest project ever but i really wanted to do my best on every spread#i also worked really hard on the extra pages for the zine. i hope you like those as well if you decide to get it!#i've been wanting to make this comic since evermore came out in 2020 and i listened to ivy for the first time#i posted the first sketches from this comic on my patreon in 2022 and released the first page last year in 2023#so it's been a loooong time coming working on this in between other art#i was always disappointed that i got a hand injury back when i was making my dorothea/'tis the damn season comic#so i couldn't give my 100% on every page of that one. that's part of why i wanted to go all out for my ivy comic#and it has a happy ending this time!♡#thank you for sticking around if you've been reading since page 1#and thank you also if you just read it for the first time today!#also i didn't plan it but i coincidentally finished this comic exactly on lesbian visibility week. love that#ivy comic mimimar#oc#ivy#willow#taylor swift#taylor swift ivy#ivy taylor swift#evermore#illustration#illo#comic#lesbian#wlw#sapphic#lesbian visibility week#lesbian art#wlw art#sapphic art
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apartment shenanigans
from utilities included, ch. 9 (mind the tags and rating!)
masterpost
#one piece#sanji#zoro#zosan#utilities included#this week was… NOT a good week. i struggled to draw and i didnt feel well#and i was BUSY too. just a whole slew of things#so i didnt thumbnail/sketch this comic until tuesday. and then i like. did 2 pgs of lines?? but i hated them and deleted them???#but i hated those lines and deleted them!! so last night at 2am (as u do) i relined all four pages. slapped on the colors. threw on text.#so apologies if the quality is off. haha. i rly did this in like 7 hrs and now i need to sleep#im just incredibly stubborn and refused to miss the second to last chapter!!! ok time to sleep im rambling
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charmed, i'm sure
#homestuck#hom3stuck#jake english#dirk strider#dirkjake#jakedirk#admin draws#fanart#thats what you get for shrimping bro. i told you about the shrimping#to anyone whos been around for a while you can tell im quite obviously obsessed with that pose. that specific way of hugging urself#dirk was never escaping that#i need to draw some janeroxy too it bangs sm and i need to balance out this sausage party ive had going on in my head for the last xyz#how long has it been. how many weeks since ive seen natural light.#whatever.#id keep this to post in a batch with other drawings but it did well on its own on twt so i might as well post it here as is#feel like batchposting several basically finished drawings doesnt do me much good anyways. better serves smaller sketches on the same theme#ramble ramble
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“You’re a caveman. And I’ve invented fire.”
Close-ups under the cut :)
#I've had this idea since May and I've finally finished it#Did the sketch after watching SAD for the second time#I watched the end of One Step Ahead when the camera closes in on Curt and Joey's finger guns and Curt was kneeling#and I was struck violently and urgently with this idea#And then I proceeded to put it off for a million years up until last week when I picked it back up#I'm very proud of this one and I hope you guys like it as much as I do#I really love doing painting parodies and this one worked just too well#Anyways yeah- spent almost 12 hours on this piece so that's fun- time to go draw more!#Fun fact: Former US President Andrew Jackson was a flat earther#yikes#Spies are forever#SAF#Spies are forever fanart#SAF TCB#Tin Can Brothers#Tin Can Bros#tin can bros fanart#Curt Mega#Agent Curt Mega#Owen Carvour#Joey Richter#the creation of adam#The creation of adam parody#My art
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always by your side
#couuugh. whehezze#hold on#project sekai#emu otori#pjsk#prsk#proseka#ok thatsg enough RANK 96 COOOOOGUH WHEEEZE#literlaly cough wheez ei have fucking covid. i wanted to draw something nicer for the event but my hands rlly hrut snd my throat hirts and#i was sticking my head in the freezer in between matches.#omfg i didnt think the end sprint was gonna be so insane i didnt have enough energy. mfers made me spend 700 gems. nene please.#i never wanna open the game agaon.(guy who will open it tomorrow and sunday) 16 MIL POINTS.. pimh was only 9mil. for rank 80smth.#the hatsune miku colorful stage tiering economy is in shambles#'im never doing that again' [will do it again in august]#event was insane. started out ill -> only 1 rate up card -> charger broke -> assignments -> covid on the last day. Be fr#to my beloved sakurako and fixer i wub you. ill try to finish my nice profile but well honk mimimi.#NSIFFLKE. SNIFFLE. WAAAAAAH#this is so lazy but i havent drawn for myself literally in a week. other than doodles i did between matches#actually theyre like little bobblehead emus all over my sketchbooks i should collage them into anpost#idk how people get that subtle gaussian blur on their lines i tried it but it looks so obvious to me here.. maybe bc i used a thick brush..#ok wonderhoy i need to lay down so bad tylenol save me. I ACCIDENTALLY SWALLOWED MY LOZENGE IN THE MIDDLE OF A GAAAAAME
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Just two siblings back from the dead, hanging out, totally not using this opportunity to torment one another for the rest of time! <3
Chara Week Day 4: Flowers
[Image Description: A digital drawing of Chara and Flowey from Undertale. They're on the Surface, with grass and trees and mountains stretching out behind them. Chara has golden flowers clustered around their left eye and speckled in their hair and on their hands. They're kneeling on the ground and smiling wide, holding Flowey's flower pot in one arm. Their other hand is outstretched in front of them and holding a camera. Flowey has a red bow wrapped around his stem and stickers in the shape of hearts, stars, and smiley faces decorating his pot. He looks annoyed as Chara leans their face in close to his to take a photo. /End ID]
#chara week#chara week 2023#safeutdr#undertale#chara dreemurr#my art#flowey#undertale flowey#undertale chara#chara undertale#flowey undertale#chara#there were a lot of things I could have done with the flowers prompt but I wanted to do something more wholesome than my last post#plus this was the first thing that came to mind. flowey is a flower. and I usually draw Chara with flowers all over them post-pacifist so#it's like the golden flowers became a part of both of them after they got resurrected. ✨symbolism ✨ idk.#the stickers on Flowey's pot are courtesy of Frisk. they like decorating everything with stickers#also. sorry for giving every character I draw black nail polish. it will happen again. </3#i'm not super satisfied with the background of this one because I was pretty lazy with it and it doesn't mesh well with the foreground#buuuuut I'm fine with it because I don't want to spend more time fixing it. and it's like. fine. just not as good as it COULD be#also I'm new to writing image descriptions so if there's anything I could adjust/describe better let me know#I just thought I should try adding one when I can#🌼
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PAGE VOMIT
#homestuck#god i wanna pass out but i need to. FUCKKKKKK#so much shit to do#clutches my head#who cares though. i am healing#clearly needed to get this out after whatever last week was#deep breath guys here we go#rose lalonde#dirk strider#rosebot#ultimate dirk#(‘s ass)#well. he’s there as a dragon too#i rescind tnat last that#Tag#i meant tag#not that#im so tired#also that wasnt that many to list. idk why i thought it was abotu to be a whole wall of names
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gangs all here at least, himbo supreme, sweet "normal" lady, totally sane terminal insomniac and their police officer baby sitter. tftgs vol3
#that other image of Jack i did like last week was at the end of this book#wild i know he still had all his#O'brian you do your job way too well#you need to put up with these three idk how you do it#Jerry and Rosa being shining lights of optimism and positivity will never get old#her dress has pockets!#also i did make sure to get Jerry's shirt right with the googly eyes- hes so silly#tales from the gas station#tftgs jack#tftgs jerry#tftgs rosa#tftgs o'brian#tftgs vol3#tftgs fanart#tftgs#art#artwork#fanart#Amelia O'Brien#Jack Townsend#rosa vasquez#jerry pascal
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#hey remember when santa brought twelveclara back together? 'CAUSE I DO#doctor who#dwedit#dwgif#timelordgifs#tvedit#twelfth doctor#s8#death in heaven#well... post credits#so basically#last christmas#peter capaldi#nick frost#mine#my gifs#and damn look at that tardis lighting!#everything is dynamic making every scene in there so cool to look at#esp the light going around the room in that huge circle! love itt#...will rewatch last christmas this week and lose my mind. excited!
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2009 Abu Dhabi Grand Prix - Sebastian Vettel(ft. Mark Webber & Jenson Button)
#fantastic podium!! maybe my favorite of this season?????#sebmarkson podiums are my fav ever nothing can top them#and both mark and jense were being so cute with seb this race aaaahhhhhhh <333333#theres something about seb that makes older men want to cuddle him and pick him up and pour champagne on him#haha thank you to dru for showing me seb getting drenched on this podium a few weeks and making me hype for this race!!#this race was very very good as well. like the last laps battle btwn mark and jense was insane#its very good when i already know the results of a race but the racing still makes me sit on the edge of my seat and scream a bit#i mentioned this before but i love how this race felt like an epilogue and it was nice to see everyone having fun and enjoying themseles#thank you everybody for joining me on another season journey!!! it been so much fun. ive really really enjoyed 2009#brawn is just soooooo cool to me. their story is insane!! im glad ive gotten to watch thru this season before the docu abt them comes out#but also very fun to see the beginning of rbr getting to the top of the field. every good result just felt so rewarding and worth it#anyways dont wanna do too much commentary abt it since ive discussed it a lot. onto 2010 next!!!! i shall miss you 2009#though i will say. it was rly interesting in this race to hear their team predictions for next season bcs a lot of it doesnt pan out#mark webber#jenson button#sebastian vettel#sebson#martian#sebmark#f1#formula 1#formula one#we do a little bit of f1#2009 abu dhabi gp#season: 2009
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Day 2: Timeloop / Xiao Qi and Jiu Ge
I am cringe and I am not even free
Feel free to reuse this idea but 24 hours are not enough for me to finish an entire comic. I could have taken the simpler prompt but nOOOOOO timeloop is too tempting. Past me why are we like this
#svsss#shen jiu#yue qingyuan#qijiu#qijiuweek2024#the basic idea for this was that both yqy and sj remember each loop#the loop started after their individual deaths in PIDW and resets them to close to disciple era#aka the time Yue Qi was in the caves and SJ presumably got away from the Qiu household or was already with Wu Yanzi#I imagine the first few loops they qi deviated so hard from the shock that they didnt even make it like 1 hour in the loop before beingrese#and then had a few loops just fucking around and finding out#eventually they realise that the other has the memories of all loops and so begins the talks and figuring how tf they can get out of this#maybe they resolve their issues with the promise or not your choice tbh#they try different plans and methods#but they keep dying (read: SJ keeps dying first and YQY either dies or sewerslides not soon after) and getting reset with no end in sight#until the last pages where the svsss timeline begins#SJ got replaced with SY and the system isn't letting YQY join him in death or smth nor letting him do anything about SY being there instead#And due to their closeness from being immensily tired from all the loops#YQY notices it immediately but can't do anything about it#the bonus for SY is that this timeline was very kind to LBH & co - 79 figured by now that keeping him in the sect and happy was their best#bet at staying alive - or well at least for longer#I'll continue this storyline in one of the future prompts of this qijiu week#btw the one with the cliff is just the whoopsie daisy timeline where SJ accidentally falls into the Abyss trying to keep LBH from falling i#79 had a bit of a good laugh about that one#cw death#cw violence#cw blood#cw angst
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Bucky Barnes Captain America: The First Avenger (2011)
the way he looks at steve (part 1, part 2, part 3)
(steve vers.)
#flashing tw#my gifs#marveledit#dailymarvelgifs#chris evans#captain america#steve rogers#marvel#steverogersedit#ca:tfa#stucky#stevebucky#anotha one#sorry these look like shit i am only so good at photoshop and this movie is only color graded so well <3#it was only like last week when i started giffing stuff that i was like why the fuck are all marvel movies so fucking YELLOW#WHY do they look like that#im gonna keep making em though im gonna keep making em#next up in the set is winter soldier so. thatll be fun
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