#and I have not been treated right by a single one
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╰➤Riding Them || One Piece
featuring: doflamingo, corazon, buggy, mihawk and ace
a/n: finally a third part for this series!! thanks for the love and support guys!! <33!! // hugs and kisses to everyone!! uwu
summary: riding these beautiful one piece men because I’m whore when it comes to anime men. 😩😩 // part 1 ,, part 2
warnings: doflamingo, nsfw, riding, buggy being a bottom, mihawk being a top, face fucking.
✦•·················• 𝐍𝐒𝐅𝐖 𝐀𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃!! •·················•✦
Doflamingo
This man is ruthless whenever you’re riding him and despite him being the bottom he still has his ways to dominate you and your feelings. And this man will degenerate you in every way possible. He’s spitting either god awful dirty things at you or sweet words. Such as !! “Such a dirty whore, you love riding my cock? Can’t get enough of it?” Or “Such a good Princess. Keep making me feel good, such a good girl.”
He gets even more rough with you when he’s had a long and hard day. He’ll just make his way towards your direction and shove you slightly towards the his private room. He doesn’t care if you’re in a middle of conversation. And once in the room he’ll sit on the bed and patted his leg. “Sit. It’s been a long day and I need a good fucking.”
And once you end up on his lap his hands are all over your body, squeezing anything he can grab. And he isn’t gentle, not wasting time he’s always striping you from your clothes, and he’s already stripping himself from everything…well besides his sunglasses. Placing sloppy kisses across your neck . “Come on princess.” He whispered, as he stroke himself. “Sit on your throne and ride away.”
And he helps you aline yourself with him, and this man is so huge and thick that you wince every time you’re in this position. Whimpering softly, as he allows you to adjust to his size, and he can’t help but have a smug smirk across his face. “So tight. So good Princess…you love riding me. Right?” And to which you moan and nod, looking at his eyes and nod. “Mm so good Doffy…so big…you fill me up so good..”
Doflamingo loves watching you shake in pleasure as your riding him, the way your hips move against his, the way your chest bounces. Everything gets him so hard for you. And sadly you do tend to get tried quicker than him so when you start to slow down he’ll hold down your hips and fuck you to his liking. And you better scream his name, he wants everyone that you belong to him.
And this man doesn’t believe in aftercare…so good luck with that.
Corazon
He’s the quite opposite from his brother, than man is more shy than anything. He’s scared that he’ll hurt you due to his size. After all he’s much taller than you and he doesn’t want to harm you. But after one day of trying to convince him he decided to try it out and he ended up loving this sex position. So he loves when you offer to ride him. “Mm I need to ride you sweetheart. May I?” You cooed out softly, to which he began turning red.
He’s so gentle with you. Treating with such care and with so much love. And whenever you’re on top of him, he loves to admire your beautiful body and face. He’ll run his hands along your waist and hips. “Feel so good…you look so beautiful on top of me..” He moans out. Cora loves watching how your boobs bounce, he can’t help but squeeze them. He loves watching how prefectly you fit him.
He’s always using his devil fruit abilities when having sex with you. Especially when you’re riding him. Because let’s be honest he’s a moaner. He wants to every single noise you make. So when you try to cover your mouth he’ll move your hand. “It’s okay my dear. Feel free to moan my name out. No one is going to hear us.” Because god forbid Doflamingo
He loves thrusting his hips upwards and hitting every sweet spot of yours. He loves how your body reacts to every little thing. The way your head is thrown back moaning his name. “Mm Cora…you feel so good…” And this babey would also praise you. Let’s say you’re getting tried he’ll hold your hips and thrust upwards and take over “It’s okay my dear. I’ll take it from here.”
THIS IS 100% FOR AFTERCARE!! He’ll kiss your hickeys and praise you once again. “You did wonderful my dear.” Also!! He’ll grab your favorite snacks and run you a warm bath!! And after that he’ll cuddle you until you fall asleep. A lot of head kisses and a bunch of “I love you.”
Buggy
This man is a total bottom for you. And he loves to brag to everyone that he’s the top of your guys relationship but behind close doors he’s falling onto his knees for you. He loves it whenever you dominate him. Especially when you ride him because he gets a good fucking and a good view of your tits. He loves squeezing your tits and saying “Honk”
You’ll start off by sitting on his lap and taking his lips against yours into a heated kiss. “Mmm…I need you to ride me again..” He whispered against the kiss. And you gladly accepted his offer. Stripping him from his close, placing small kisses along his neck. And before sinking into his cock you’ll stroke nice and slowly and tease him. “Such a dirty little clown…can’t get enough of me?” Biting his neck, and sitting on his lap.
Buggy has to beg for you to do anything. “Please Y/N…stop teasing me…” And you’ll cut him off mid sentence by pinning him against his back and sinking onto his cock. And he has to bite his lip from moaning out loudly. And you’ll move your hips slowly, until he’s begging for more. “Come on clown. Beg for more.”
You love hearing him moan your name out. So whenever he tries to cover his mouth. You shake you head. “Tch..naughty clown. I want to hear your pretty little sounds.” And he’s a whimpering and moaning mess. The rest of the crew probably hears him and they tease the hell out of him. Poor Buggy.
Buggy uses his Devil Fruit abilities whenever you’re riding him. One floating hand will be teasing your nipples, while the other hand is playing with your clit. “Heh..I make you so good huh?” And speaking of his devil fruit abilities, you’ll make him remove his head and place it across the room and you’ll ride his body. You’re the star of the show and he’s enjoying it.
Pspsps Mihawk and Crocodile know he’s the bottom of your guys relationship and honestly they aren’t so surprised.
Mihawk
This man…this is definitely the top of your guys relationship. He isn’t going to submit to anyone and that also includes you. So whenever you are riding him it’s on his terms and only on his terms. “Hmm I think you deserve a treat my dear. You’ve been such a good girl, how about tonight you take the lead.” And his words are already making you weak to your knees.
Before riding him he’ll appreciate a nice lingerie, he loves to admire your beauty. And you bet your ass he’s going to praise you. “Such a beautiful dear…you’re going to look even more beautiful on top.” He say softly and grab your hand and lead you to the bed and he’ll sit down and pat on his leg. “Sit my dear.”
And once in his lap he’ll place a gentle kiss on your lips. “Just because you’re on top doesn’t mean I’m submitting to you.” He whisper against your lips. Nodding, you place small kisses along his cheeks and neck which will earn your a hum of approval. And once he’s admired your body, he’ll strip his own clothes and yours and stroke himself as he smirks at you. “Now careful, don’t break yourself dear.”
And once he’s inside of you, you take a moment because he feels so much bigger in this position. “Mm Mihawk…so big..” Moaning out, and he groans as he felt your walls clench around him. He gives you a moment to adjust before placing his hands on your hips and moves his hips upwards. And he knows what spots to make you cry out.
Whenever Mihawk notices your getting tried he’ll run a finger along your clit. “Now don’t disappoint me my dear.” He coos, which makes you whimper and move your hips against his until you guys reach each other’s climax’s. And when you do finish, he’ll quickly flip you over. Being on top once again.. “Now, my turn to fuck you my dear.”
Ace
This man is a total switch, and if you want to ride his dick he’s already dragging you to the bedroom. And he’s already kissing you with such hunger. Hands all over body. “Damn..you wanna bounce on my cock again?” He’ll tease you and strip you naked. And once you’re naked he’ll whistle. “Wow, beautiful as always.”
His favorite position is reserve cowgirl style, and to top off the position he’ll make you wear his hat. God…seeing you in his hat makes him cum alone. So this position is top three favorites. And he also loves watching the view…the way your ass is bouncing off of him. “God babe…you know how to drive a man crazy.”
Ace doesn’t bother trying to muffle his moans, if you’re making him feel good then he’s gonna let the whole ship know. And the same goes to you…both of you guys are loud. “God babe…your pussy makes me feel so good…fucking good.” He moans out, smacking your ass which earned a loud moan from your lips. “Fuck Ace…dick so good.”
You guys are so loud that the ship knows you guys are fucking and they have to bang on the door to keep you guys quiet. “You guys fuck like rabbit! Keep it down! We’re trying to sleep.” To which results in you and Ace laughing.
Speaking of dick riding. He loves when you face fuck him. Ride his face…he fucking loves it. And he doesn’t want 10% percent of your body weight he wants you to full sit. USE HIS FACE AS YOUR CHAIR UWU.
#x reader#one piece#op#anime#headcanons#smut#one piece x reader#one piece smut#doflamingo#donquixote doflamingo#doflamingo x reader#Doflamingo smut#corazon x reader#Corazon#donquixote rosinante#Corazon smut#miahwk#mihawk x reader#Mihawk smut#dracule mihawk#buggy#buggy the clown#buggy smut#portgas ace x reader#ace smut#portgas d ace#portgas ace smut
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inspired by @twijaxx take on the kaiser scene at the end of ep 14 😍😍😍
imagine kaiser booked a nice little hotel getaway for you both to get a way for a bit on his break, a really rare occurrence for him. he barely ever gets a break from football so it’s nice to escape once in a while and have some normalcy. berlin is a really nice city too, and kaiser’s pockets are deep enough to afford the best of the best. that’s why you’re both sitting on the balcony after his shower, sipping at champagne worth more money than either of you could have envisioned a few years ago. kaiser likes treating himself to the luxuries of life; expensive champagne, 5 star hotels, designer robes, exquisite jewellery. but most of all you. you are the greatest luxury of them all.
and you know how to use that nice little mouth you have on you as well - so almost every single night like this ends with you on your knees sucking his cock, taking it so well.
and tonight isn’t any different, he’s a bit drunk, you’re sober. he throws you that charming smirk that no girl can resist, not even you, and you know what he wants. the city is so beautiful at this time. it’s a shame your view is obstructed by his cock, or not, you like the sight and he knows you do. he has you on your knees beneath the opaque table, has you at his feet exactly where he likes you, almost spoon feeding you his length. and you open your mouth so meekly. so willing and so obedient for him just how he likes it.
you know you’re doing a good job the way his hand is tangled in your hair and he’s pushing your head down on his cock so hard your nose is smashed into his pubic bone. but neither of you care; you’re both as disgusting and perverted as each other. “keep going f’ me baby” he breathes out. and he feels like he’s about to cum, he really does, until his phone vibrates on the table. you expect him to not answer because of the way he growls in such an irritated manner, until you hear him breathe a sigh of relief. before he can even answer you stop sucking him and look up at him with big pouty eyes. “micha are you really gonna answer at a time like this?” god he wants to destroy you, he really fucking does. looking at you with saliva coating your pretty pink lips and teary eyes whilst you’re on your knees looking so desperate to have his dick lodged in your throat again, you’re a sight for sore eyes. but he just rolls his eyes and snaps at you “obviously, if i was going to press answer before you stopped sucking me, stupid whore” you’re used to his chastising at this point. so you just whine up at him, before he shuts you up again with one thrust of his cock back in your mouth. you’re mad, you look ridiculous with your angry pouting face and his shaft in your mouth. he does a shushing motion to you before he starts speaking on the phone.
he knows you won’t do anything against him, so he just leaves you to cockwarm him whilst he talks. you’re dumb and malleable, so he knows the call doesn’t need to be made in private. every so often he leans down and smacks your cheek affectionately, but god. the wait is so fucking agonising. it really feels like it’s been an hour. you just want to taste his cum, feel his cock, have his fingers inside you, anything. but you’re forced to sit on your knees whilst he makes some stupid call.
so you do something a little unprecedented, especially for a girl who kaiser thought was so obedient. you stand up from where you were originally kneeling and sit yourself down on his cock. and boy is he mad, he’s never shoved his hands over a phone speaker so fast. “what are you doing you fucking idiot?” his words are sharp and he hisses them at you. you just whine back at him. “you’re making me wait too long- don’t w-wanna wait- ah” he wants to fucking punch you right now, wants to grab your jaw and break it. he really fucking does. thank god he’s holding his hand over the speaker or they’d hear those precious moans that only HE deserves to hear. kaiser is really angry at you, but this call is important, so he simply brings his mouth to your ear and whispers, “fine stay like this then, but you better be a good fucking girl yeah? behave or you won’t cum tonight.” and you’re elated, you really are. you feel so full with his cock inside you. kaiser just dead eyes you and goes back to talking with whoever is on the other end. some boring football stuff, you suppose.
but god, this is even more agonising than before now; you stupid horny little thing. it’s even worse now, you wanna bounce on his cock so bad. you want him to fuck you so hard oh so desperately, but if you move you know you’re in trouble. he has one hand holding his phone to his ear as he talks and the other twirling pieces of your hair around his finger as he stares off into the serene view of the city. god you hate this, you hate it so much. you hate how sweetly he’s playing with your locks, how the city is so fucking peaceful and boring, and how he’s not doing anything. kaiser is a man who knows how to control all of his stimuli, he’s toying with you, you’re too stupid to realise it. he wants to laugh at you and your pathetic state, but he can’t; he has matters to attend to!
your pretty little head is filled with nothing except thoughts of how hard you want him to bang you on this stupid little table. how you want him to just bend you over and fuck the living shit out of you. but he’s still talking. you’re so desperate, poor stupid you, you contemplate moving despite his words. but that won’t end well. but i called you stupid for a reason, you did it anyway! you try to do it as lightly as you can; you really swear! you’d never want to anger your boyfriend on purpose. but it’s on his fucking cock you idiot. you think he can’t feel it. he growls in your ear, getting agitated now “listen you fucking whore, if you can’t even wait a few minutes for me to finish talking what does that say about you?” he’s insulting your self control. it’s true you’re so pathetic. but he keeps going to your surprise, having muted his end of the line to give you this scolding. “pull that shit on me again you little bitch and i swear to fucking god i will leave you like this and i won’t touch you ever again. understand?” he’s angry, and you gulp. kaiser’s wrath is not something anyone would ever want to face. but you’re so desperate, you beg, you plead for him to reconsider “p-please- can’t wait more- i can’t micha i can’t i can’t i ca-“ and god does your sweet begging just make him even harder. pisses him off even more. he has your throat in his tattooed hand now. “i said, do you understand, don’t make me ask again, engelchen” engelchen, what an ironic nickname for what you’re doing right now. “mmmhm- micha-“ he slaps you a bit. “use your words or i might not know what you mean, baby” he’s such a fucking tease. it’s so hard to speak without moaning, and you know if you get him in trouble he’ll be super pissed. that’s a line you don’t wanna cross for sure. “u-understand micha-“ and he glares at you. but he releases his grip, picks up his phone and praises you before he unmutes himself again. “good girl, wait a few more minutes yeah? then i’ll give you what you want.”
those few minutes were the most painful minutes of your life. even torture couldn’t compare to this. you want him so fucking bad, you’re like a bunny in heat, and he forced you to wait and sit still the entire time. if you so much as moved he shot you a look so cold and mean it could probably kill the average person. you’re used to it; and you hate the fact it turned you on even more. you’re literally foaming at the mouth, bless your poor soul. you don’t even realise when your boyfriend finally hangs up the phone until he grips your waist again and takes a swig of his champagne. ready? and you’re so ready, oh you’re so fucking ready, you nod so eagerly - when you hear the glass clink on the table and feel him picking you up off his lap you know what’s coming.
it’s like heaven when he bends your sweet little ass over the table and fucks you into oblivion. you whined so much, god your moans are music to his ears. the neighbours probably thought there was an early christmas choir with all the slapping and the noises. no; that’s just you and your boyfriend’s disgustingly crude display of love. kaiser is a rough fucker, and today is no different; well, yes it is. he’s mad at you, he’s so mad, you can tell from the way he’s holding your head down against the table and smashing his fat girth so hard into your little cunt. you might just split open. it wouldn’t surprise you. but who cares? this is like heaven.
all of his rage from your stupid, impatient, slutty antics is poured into each thrust. after he was nice enough to let you sit on his lap? “you fucking slut, you- ah- deserve this so much-“ he condescends you as he pounds your little backside. your pussy is aching and his cock is filling you up and hitting the right places so well. he pulls your face up by the hair just enough for you to be able to respond to him. he wants to hear you. “m-michaaa- hard-der- more- micha- ‘m sorry- love you- love your cock- love you lo-love you-“ your cries are so cute. he loves your teary face and your desperate whines. with a final hard thrust he finally finishes inside of you. and just the feeling of his hot cum in your womb is enough to give you an orgasm too. the feeling of him inside you is incredible. you’re kinda like a jigsaw puzzle; you want to laugh at that thought. that would be a really disgusting puzzle.
when he finally pulls out, your saliva from before and his cum drip out of your pussy. there’s slick rolling down your legs and your hair is all messed up. he doesn’t like seeing his essence leak out of you though, so he roughly pushes it back in with two fingers and leans down to peck your forehead. “today i was nice, you and me both know that. fix up your act, prinzessin” and all you can do is nod, you both know nothing will change, you’re a cockdrunk little slut. but you can pretend, you’re both good at that. all you can do is pant as you feel him lift you into his arms and lean into his chest.
tonight’s sleep is gonna hit so different.
#blue lock#blue lock x reader#bllk x reader#blue lock x y/n#michael kaiser x reader#kaiser x reader#kaiser michael x reader#lemon#smut#oneshot#michael kaiser oneshot#michael kaiser smut
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On a very serious note, the jokes or takes about Caitlyn being a fascist or a dictator definitely have to stop. She is neither one of those things. Caitlyn’s whole mission was to dismantle shimmer, get rid of the chembarons and remaining partners of Silco, and locate Jinx. Not dictate over Zaun and further the oppression against the Zaunites (she literally asks Ambessa why peace is the justification for violence), instead taking measures that would benefit them in the long run with more opportunities for growth (hence getting rid of shimmer and chembarons).
Using the definition of fascism—“a populist politicial philosophy, movement, or regime that exalts nation and often race above the individual, that is associated with a centralized autocratic government headed by a dictatorial leader, and that is characterized by severe economic and social regimentation and by forcible suppression of opposition,”—Ambessa is the one people should be looking to when using that term. She is a colonizer, a warlord that has made it known that any person or nation that is weak or shows significant fragility should be dealt with. She even exiles her own daughter for such, insulting her as well as Topsiders. She believes it to be her right to position herself in the battles between two cities, singling out the one she deems a “problem” and using her own forces to basically put them in their place before she chooses to eradicate them. Ambessa would have no qualms about invading and emptying out all of Zaun if she was able to without interference. We’re literally shown that she has been pulling the strings from the get-go in order to further the hatred and disgust Piltover has for Zaun. Orchestrating the memorial attack to force the hands of the council, and Caitlyn, to take action because of the fear that this is an impending uprising so she could get what she wants out of the blood of Zaunites being spilled.
Labeling Caitlyn as a fascist or dictator, ignoring that her issue was not with Zaun or Zaunites all together but Jinx herself as a single individual, is quite irresponsible considering the fact that it is watering down the severity and gravity of what those terms mean and the history behind them. It is also very sad and frustrating to see people act very performative or morally righteous in their portrayals of Caitlyn as such even more when we are watching literal gen-cides (don’t know if this’ll be censored) happen to many different communities of people. It overall just feels like people care more about virtue signaling than actually being good people that have the capacity to understand what’s fictional, while also acknowledging the importance of understanding politics in fiction, still treating it with the respect and attentiveness necessary.
To add: calling Caitlyn, KKKiramman is pretty disgusting considering that she is not actively trying to achieve supremacy against the Zaunites with Topsiders. I don’t understand why Black people are the butt of jokes like this when we are still facing such oppression and violence from white supremacists. And to also ruffle a couple more feather, Caitlyn is the minority being targeted time and time again here by a white person, yet I don’t see people talking about that aspect.
#arcane#caitlyn arcane#caitlyn kiramman#arcane league of legends#arcane jinx#ambessa medarda#arcane ambessa
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when hearts find their way / Aaron Hotchner
summary. if Hotch decided to break up with you to protect you, he regrets it anytime he looks at you. And he looks at you a lot.
words count. 2,443
a/n. just a short story, she said, just to start writing again. And here comes my first Hotch fic with more than 2k words. It's a first, I hope you'll like and well...I'll write something happier another day (it has a good ending I promise)
Hotch wished he could stop looking at you.
It wasn’t like he needed to focus on you right now. Not outside the office. Not at Rossi’s party to celebrate another year as a completely alive team. Not when you’re clearly out of danger.
Well, except if he counted Emily’s and JJ’s drinking with you more than usual.
But that wasn’t a real danger. Especially when there were plenty of people not drinking tonight to make sure everyone will go back home safe. Including Reid. Including himself.
However, Hotch was incapable of putting his eyes away from you.
Too scared there might be an unknown treat around here. Too scared you might disappear if he dared look away. Too scared you might find somebody else to end the night.
That was the scariest thought above all.
He clinched on his drink harder, blaming himself for being so stupidly attached to someone he shouldn’t. Someone he already told no before.
“And I thought we locked up Hotch in the office to get Aaron tonight,” Rossi said, standing next to him. Hotch let out a small and single amused sigh. He took the risk of closing his eyes for a second. When he opened them again, you were still there. Thankfully.
“I’m fully here, David.” he answered, turning to his friend who looked more than amused by the situation. There was one problem with being close with your coworker: when their work is to analyze people, you can be sure they will do it with you too. “Having fun?”
“More than you I guess.” Hotch opened his mouth to respond to it but didn’t get the time before Rossi put his hand up. “Or your level of fun is watching over her?”
Was he that obvious? Technically, he had been standing alone in the corner of the room for a few minutes now. “I’m not watching over her.” Of course, it didn’t convince Rossi. Worse, it made him laugh.
“Oh you clearly are, Aaron. I know you’re not a man of many words but you should consider that speaking is better than stalking.”
He sighed, taking another slip of his drink. “Would you stop, please?”
But Hotch had to be honest. Because he did take profit of the silence and the small break Rossi was giving him to take another look. He saw you dancing with Morgan. The first thing that came to his mind was that he was safe.
Safe from what, you idiot? It’s not like he had any right to be jealous or possessive. Or even protective. You weren’t his. And it was his fault.
Hotch could never forget how your expression went from desire, the need to kiss every single piece of face, to the sadness and the anger of being rejected. “We shouldn't do that.” He heard himself say. Four stupid words. Four stabs right into your heart.
“I’ll give you some advice.” Rossi said to interrupt his thoughts. And Hotch gave up, fully concentrating on whatever he had to say to prevent himself from reliving the night that ruined everything.
“Either you talk to her and make a move. Or you leave her alone. But stop playing with that girl's heart and mind.”
“You say that like she cares.” He knew that by saying that, he was admitting there was more than a professional conflict between you. Not that anyone in this house was even believing that it was only professional. You don’t look at a member of your team like they were the loss of your life. Not the biggest, but close.
“Oh she does.” Rossi said, looking at you. So did Hotch. And for the first time tonight, he caught your eyes on him. Just for a second before you noticed and went back to your discussion with Emily. But it was enough for him.
__
Later that night, Hotch learnt that Rossi wasn’t the only one aware that something was going between you two.
He was one of the first to sit at the table, in front of JJ. They talked for a few minutes and more members of the team started to join. Until JJ got up suddenly and called your name. “Please, take my seat.”
“What? Why?” you replied, confused at the offer when there were still some places available at the end of the table. You didn’t take the time to look at JJ’s seat, next to who she was. It was like she gave you the time too anyway.
As soon as you approached, she put both hands on your shoulder to make you sit. “It will be easier to check on Henry if at the head of the table.” she replied, putting a kiss on your hair before leaving you still very confused. For a few seconds.
Until you looked up and met those brown eyes that you started to know by heart until they became a mystery again.
“Very subtle, Jennifer.” you sighed. But you weren’t mad. Not at her for reading you and trying to help you. And neither at Hotch. You could tell from the little frowning, because everything was always little when it comes to expressing himself -but thankfully not little on other things-, that he was as confused as you are.
You saw him lean closer to you, his hands on the table to stay stable. And you did the same to hear him. “I didn’t…it’s not…”
You could restrain the smile on your face. You could blame it on the alcohol to not accept it. But it was a genuine reaction to him, opening himself to you. A little. “I know.” you replied, naturally putting your hand on top of his.
When Hotch freezed at your contact, you assumed you went too far. Again. And immediately take your hand off, lean back on your chair and start a new conversation with Reid to avoid your boss.
When Hotch freezed at your contact, he actually was just thrown back to weeks earlier when you couldn’t stop touching him. And for a brief second, he remembered how good it felt to be appreciated.
Sadly, it didn’t last long. Because he was incapable of keeping people he loved in his life.
Most of the dinner was bittersweet for Hotch.
The team was loud and most of you laughed so hard you had a stomach ache. And the food was so nice that Emily asked multiple times if Rossi was sure he couldn’t adopt her. The answer sadly stayed no.
And Hotch would lie saying he didn’t have a good time.
But he would also lie if he said your lack of interaction didn’t hurt him.
He noticed how you always make sure to not meet his eyes when he couldn’t stop looking at you. With the way the candle’s light was dancing on your face, he felt like discovering your traits again.
Or how you only responded when he talked to you directly. Which he stopped after a few tries.
Hotch wasn’t the only one noticing that. None of the team felt like stepping in a story they didn’t know. Even if they heart felt for their boss who felt disarmed for the first time -at least, for them. And for you, because you had your reasons to act like that.
But in the end, they did step in. Without meaning to.
When the party came to an end, they all started to organize the ride back home. JJ jumped into Reid’s car while Morgan brought Emily back to her place. Everybody left slowly.
Until there was you.
And Hotch.
“Of course.” you mumbled when you saw him and Rossi talking in the hallway. They didn’t notice you yet and you took the opportunity to watch the man that broke your heart. Because you had to be honest, Aaron still held a special place in your heart. He looked so good tonight and especially right now, with his shirt more unbuttoned than before and his jacket laying on his arm. You loved his hair a little less styled after many hours or how his eyes looked more glassy from the wine and the fatigue.
You loved many things about that man. Which made the heartbreak even more difficult to accept.
“Oh, you’re here.” Rossi noticed you and opened his arm to add you in the conversation. “Hope you enjoyed the evening.”
“It was perfect David, thank you.” you replied with a genuine smile that created the exact same one on Hotch. When you turned to him, he was surprised that your smile didn’t drop. “Can we go?” you asked and he simply nodded.
“I’m sorry.” Hotch said once you were both sitting in the car. “I didn’t plan this.”
If you had any doubt that it wasn’t his fault, you were now sure that he wasn’t the thinker of this situation. From the way he couldn’t look at you or how his hands were shaking before he put them on the wheel. “I know.”
Without a surprise, the ride was calm. Hotch was a silent driver, focusing on the road and the music coming from the radio for a low volume. And you appreciated that. You did back then when you saw each other because it was peaceful. You still did. How ironic that the ride to your place felt more like home than the idea of going to your own apartment.
It was a memory of a better time. Of coming home from cases with Aaron, going to your place because it was more serene to him than his silent home. The only thing missing was his hand grabbing yours now and then during the drive. Multiple times, Hotch actually started to move his hand before remembering he couldn’t do that no more.
When he finally parked, you turned to him to thank him. Even, maybe, probably, apologizing for your attitude tonight. But he spoke before you.
“I shouldn’t have done that.”
You frowned. “Driving me home? I mean, Rossi could have given a room for the night but I really appreciate you dri…”
“Breaking up with you.”
The silence came back. Because you didn’t know what to answer. Sure, he shouldn't have done that.
Aaron shouldn’t have looked at you after spending another night with you. Not after sharing a hotel room with you in San Francisco during all the cases. Not after making love every single night that week there to forget about the atrocity of the world outside. To feel loved. To give love.
Not after making you believe that this could become a routine. Something normal. Something real. Something that he thought could become real too.
No, he shouldn’t have looked at you from where you were laying: on your bed, still naked under the sheet. While he was putting on his shirt from yesterday. And said “We shouldn’t do that.” Four words. Not more. Not an explanation because of course Aaron Hotchner didn’t have to explain himself. He was the boss, after all.
And you were so mad that morning, knowing that this could come but believing it wouldn’t, that you didn’t ask for more. You only gave him an emotionless “ok”.
“After San Francisco,” Aaron started, “I got scared. Because I’m your boss. Because this felt natural. I really wanted this to continue, but at what cost? Too many scenarios came to me during the flight back. What if something happened to you during a case. What if we break up and we can’t work together properly. What if someone finds out. Who should leave, you or me? And you knew I was being selfish because if that happened, I know people above would make sure I wasn’t the one fired.”
Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe it was your heart, but when he looked at you after opening his heart to you like that, more than ever before, you felt the tears coming. Because for the first time since the break up, you were able to stop this idea of an arrogant Hotch that took what he could and threw the rest away. You saw again the Aaron that you fell in love with: the broken man that was trying his best to breathe and find happiness again.
“In any scenario, I lose you. I stupidly believe that having control over that loss would be easier. But it’s even harder to know I broke your heart and mine at the same time and couldn't do anything to fix them.”
“But why…” you said softly, moving a little closer to him. “Why imagine and accept the worst when everything was great?”
“Because life has always been difficult and I stopped believing good things could happen to a man like me.” he let out a sad laugh. “I lost my wife, I didn’t know how to be a good dad to my son, I sometimes feel overwhelmed and incapable of doing my job right. Why would things be great with you?”
It was a genuine question. Aaron felt like happiness was an unknown concept in his life. Anytime something good happened, something bad came right after. He couldn’t even appreciate the soft hand you put on his cheek now.
“Because you deserve to be happy, Aaron.” you whispered. He let you put your forehead against his. You remembered how it appeased him back then. “Please, stop rejecting the ones that want to love you. We are here for you.”
“We?”
“There still can be a us if you want to.”
Aaron closed his eyes. He needed to think about that. He wanted you. He wanted to give himself to you. But it meant fighting against his fears. Can he be strong enough for you? Like you could read his mind, you added “We can fight together.”
Slowly, he brought a hand to your neck to have you even closer and to kiss you. A soft, sweet and small kiss on your lips. A promise that he couldn’t say outloud but he wanted you to understand. Sure, Aaron needed love. But he needed someone willing to fight against the world with him and for him.
“You know, things could have been a little easier if you told me that instead of breaking up with me when I was naked.” you said against his lips which made him laugh.
“Would you accept compensation for that moment?”
“I have all night, all day and all my life for you.”
Holding hands, you brought Aaron back to the place he felt the more at peace these past years. But in all honesty, he started to think that maybe any place with you would be a peaceful one.
#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner criminal minds#thomas gibson#hotchner#hotch#criminal minds#criminal minds x reader#aaron hotchner fluff#ssa aaron hotchner#bau#aaron hotchner one shot#aaron hotchner fic#hotchner x reader#hotchner x you#aaron hotchner x y/n#aaron hotchner x you#aaron hotchner x female reader#aaron hotchner fanfic#my writing
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Professional
A/N: Written for @the-slumberparty's December Daze Challenge.
Prompt: hosting your first new years party
Warnings: Implied stalking. Please let me know if I missed any!
This was it. Time for the big leagues. Usually you were the second-in-command at events but with Lucinda down for the count with the flu, it's time for you to step up. It's not like you haven't prepared for this kind of scenario. And the party itself was pretty straight forward.
Well, except the fact that your clients were government agents. Higher ups in the NSA, CIA, and probably other acronyms. You remember Lucinda bitching up a storm about the background check requirements for every single person who'd be working at this party. Part of you had been scared they'd find something in your own past that you'd long forgotten about that would get you arrested!
As you worked you noticed one of the guests continually looking at you. He's certainly handsome; hair cut short, eyes blue like the sea, just enough stubble to encourage thoughts about how it would feel against your skin. Unfortunately, you need to focus. There are a lot of moving pieces for the party and you can't rest until it's all over. As much as you'd love to walk over and introduce yourself, you are a professional and you will behave as such. Maybe you'll get lucky and he'll stick around afterwards so you can talk to him.
After a couple of hours, with the clock ticking closer to midnight, he seems to get tired of just looking at you from afar and walks over.
"I'm Nick," he introduces himself with a smile that would normally have your legs weak.
You introduce yourself and warn him, "I'm afraid I don't have time to chat, sir. I'm working and there are lots of things that need my attention."
He smirks as he gives a gentle shake of his head, "are you always so professional at your events?"
"Of course, sir. Though usually I'm not the one in charge. Our company has an image to maintain."
"Any chance you'll be getting a break?"
"I'd be surprised," you confess. "I don't mean to be rude, sir---"
"Nick," he corrects you.
"I don't mean to be rude, Nick, sir, but I do need to focus on my work."
"Of course," his smile drops a little. "Maybe I'll see you closer to midnight."
Heat rushes to your face as you smile at the compliment. "Maybe."
It's a few minutes to midnight and your staff is starting to look around, hoping for their own New Year's kiss. You hate being such a taskmaster but there is still work to be done. At least the party is officially over at midnight. Unofficially you know you and yours will be there for at least a few more hours after. Maybe you can give them a minute or two for a kiss. It was only briefly discussed with Lucinda before she got sick.
Your thoughts get interrupted by Nick suddenly appearing in front of you, making you jump a little.
"Sorry about that," he smiles. "Consequence of training, I guess."
You smile back, "that makes sense. Can I help you?"
He looks to the TV screens watching Times Square, "it's almost midnight and I'm not one for kissing without consent."
Giggling you look around. There's no fires, no one's hurting, there's a natural lull in the party as everyone is counting down the seconds. "Okay, Nick. That sounds lovely."
His smile widens and, as you hear the party count down the seconds, he gently brings you in for a kiss. And oh what a kiss it is! You were expecting a quick peck on the lips but Nick is treating it like a first kiss after a date. You lean into him before you catch yourself and carefully push yourself away from him.
"That was...lovely," you breathe. "But I have to get back to work now, sir. Nick! Nick."
"Right," he nods. "Because you're a professional."
Nick watches you walk away, a smile on his face. Tonight's gone better than expected. When he did the background check on you he was intrigued. He wanted to get to know you better.
Seeing you running the show confirmed his decision to get your boss sick. He got to see you in top form and you were amazing. Now he's just gotta wait until your done with work before he can ask for your number, which he already has.
He's happy you seem open to his advances. For a minute he was worried he would have to go to plan C. But this will be much better for the both of you.
Tagging: @alicedopey; @delicatebarness; @icefrozendeadlyqueen; @irishhappiness; @lokislady82; @ronearoundblindly
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Fave QL Couples of 2024
Decided to participate in a few of @babyangelsky 's End of Year Prompts. I decided to start with this one first!
AlanJeff from Pit Babe the Series. I love them so much. I love that Jeff placed so much trust in Alan and cared so much about what he thought. But he also wasn't afraid to stand his ground with him and tell him what he really thought. I love how nervous Jeff made Alan and how Alan fretted so much about breaking the ice between them. I also love how easily Alan could ease Jeff's racing mind and how he made sure Jeff understood that he wanted to be the person Jeff leaned on. I love the age gap between them and how it plays a part in the way Alan treats Jeff and how Jeff wants to be treated. I felt their dynamic was well-written.
PhayaTharn from The Sign. I will always be a sucker for soulmates. But really I just love how drawn to each other they were. I love that Tharn always found himself searching for Phaya, worrying about him because he knew that Phaya never took the time to worry for himself. I love that Phaya felt like he was going crazy when it came to Tharn. I love that he trusted Tharn enough to save him everytime which gave him the freedom to act a bit recklessly. I love that they worked so hard to save each other. I love that they were willing to die for each other and with each other. I love that they waited for each other. Also I wanted them to adopt that little girl from the special ep.
NailHim from For Him. Like I said, the series was a complete dumpster fire but they were the best thing to come out of it. They were so soft and so communicative and respectful of each other. I love that they talked things through and even discussed therapy. I love that Him went at Nail's pace, they were both in vulnerable places in life so I'm glad they took things slow. Also their sex life was top tier. I feel like they should have been in a whole different series.
Myungha and Yeowoon from Love for Love's Sake. They needed each other. They were each other's happiness. Myungha wanted nothing more than to make Yeowoon happy, it was his literal mission. With Myungha, Yeowoon found his smile again. He found his life again and was offered Myungha's companionship to cope with his late granny's death and from there he blossomed. With Yeowoo, Myungha learned that he could depend on a person. For the first time he felt like he belonged somewhere and that he was loved. Myungha had given up life in the mortal world to be together with Yeowoon and be in a place where he was truly happy. They made me so emotional and I love them.
KorNamsom from City of Stars. Oh I wanted a full series with them. Their story was so good. I love how madly in love with each other they were. I love that Kor was ready to throw hands with ANYONE who had something to say about his girlfriend being trans because he surely did not give one single fuck. He adored her. I love that Namsom tried so hard to protect Kor even if it meant her own heart was broken. I love how he treated her like a queen and how he stared at her like she hung the moon. They were so fucking good together and I hope Rock and Kimmon get paired up again because the chemistry was insane. (Couldn't find a gif!)
OyeiCher from Wandee Goodday. Our designated family pillars. Def my fave depiction of an already established couple. It feels like we were thrown directly in the middle of their problems. Their main concerns were finances, such a married couple. I love that they were very much still into each other and loudly flirting about it. I love that Oyei tried so hard to carry everything on his shoulders and Cher was right there to remind him that he wasn't alone. Cher pretty much abandoned his old life to help Oyei with his family's gym and Oyei wanted to make sure Cher was taken care of so he wouldn't feel any regrets. They worried so much for each other but also were each other's strength.
Jaejun and Jihan from City Boy Log. I swear they are the messiest couple I've ever seen but their mess is so good. They are just so fucking into each other and no matter what happens they gravitate right back to each other. I love that Jaejun lets Jihan take care of him. And I love that Jihan makes Jaejun laugh. I love that Jihan decided right away that he wanted to be with Jaejun and that he was willing to fight to keep him (and he did have to fight). I love them and their chemistry and at this point IDC about anybody else in this fucking series but them. If they're not in the ep then I'm not watching it.
MethasJJ and OabPlawan from Love No Long Beans. I love both couples of this series real fucking bad. I love how horny OabPlawan were for each other and how they caught feelings somewhere in between. I love that Methas and JJ were totally opposite. I love that JJ made Methas work for hard to earn approval. I love that Methas was so taken with JJ and was willing to do anything to be with him. I love that both couples' dynamics were so different and yet worked so well.
SanVee from Century of Love. I love that the Goddess worked so hard to prove that Vee was San's soulmate but they sort of fell in love despite that. I loved that San got the chance to fall in love all over again, to the point where he didn't care Vee was the one he was waiting for or not. I love that Vee was interested in San immediately but he didn't let San try to force him to be someone he wasn't. He stood his ground and challenged San to think about what exactly he was looking for and who exactly he wanted and why. I love by the end of things San only cared about being with Vee and nothing else.
Xiaobao and Huai'en from Meet You At the Blossom. My fave toxic ship of the year. I love how crazy Xiaobao makes Huai'en. I love how Huai'en was ready to destroy the world and give up everything to be together with Xiaobao. I also loved how Huai'en always put himself between Xiaobao and danger. I love how Xiaobao wanted nothing more than to shower Huai'en with love and affection and adoration. He was willing to show Huai'en what love is supposed to look and feel like. I loved that.
TattooAran from Jack & Joker. Even though we only got mere morsels I ate up every bit. Love how Aran was such a spoiled little rich kid but cared so much about uplifting Tattoo and standing behind his inventions. He believed in Tattoo. I love that Tattoo gave Aran that culture shock he needed and was there for him when he was feeling sad even though he felt a little awkward about it. I love that Tattoo made Aran laugh. I love that they comforted each other. They're so good together and I just wish they were given the proper time to bloom.
SianBlue for Every You, Every Me. I just thought they were so fun. I think since we only had two eps for them the plot had to cut out a lot of drama-filled fat. I love that the conflict was something so simple but helped pull them together and showed that they're communicating. I was particularly a big fan of their sex life, it was so damn ideal to me. I love that they talked about things. I think they were my fave pairing from the series, but they beat out XNamping but only a sliver.
#pit babe#pit babe the series#the sign#the sign the series#for him#for him the series#love for love's sake#city of stars#wandee goodday#city boy log#cityboy log#this love doesn't have long beans#century of love#meet you at the blossom#jack and joker#jack & joker#every you every me
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I recently unblocked a few intox blogs I had blocked for various reasons because I saw my mutuals reblogging stuff from them and figured they were members of this community and probably fine after all.
Every single one of them proceeded to be completely weird about it.
Don’t come into a gal’s inbox when she’s told you she’s not interested in talking to you, especially if you’re clearly angling to sext and sexting is clearly in her boundaries right at the top of the blog. Especially don’t do this if you never talk to her when she’s sober and she’s super drunk and you’re trying to take advantage of her lowered inhibitions to use her for drunk sex chat. Gross.
Don’t come into an engaged lady’s inbox and tell her how much you wish you were her fiancé and what kind of stuff you would do to her if you were. She already has a fiancé to do that stuff and it’s not you.
Definitely don’t come into a random woman’s inbox, flood it with 40 or so AI generated images of women drinking and demand her opinion (I know I reblog some AI art and some folks disapprove, but this is about a strangers expectations of an interaction with me, not the AI part).
They’re all blocked again and honestly if you see this and think this is about you, it probably is. Fuck off.
Also, based on their bios and our interactions, these were all straight cis men. Straight cis men are the only community members that act creepy and entitled to me. Take from that what you will, but it’s not an anti-straight cis men thing. I’m engaged to one of those. They can be great people, just like any other kind of person. There is just such a perplexingly high rate of completely un-self aware entitlement among them online. It makes me sad for them.
One positive thing is that this makes me happy that this community is more queer than ever. There have always been guys like this in the tumblr space, and there was a time when I would’ve crawled to these guys for attention because there was nothing else out there. We have a healthier, more fun and vibrant community now.
Moral of the story: Treat online women like people, even the ones who post fetish content. Anyway I’ve learned my lesson. A bigger community is not always a better one.
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fragments of us - pt.3
chris sturniolo x fem!reader
⤳ you and chris get in a car accident not only testing your relationship but also your memory…
⤳ angst, sadness, memory loss, recovery
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Days pass, and the house becomes a fragile balance of forced normalcy. You still feel like a stranger in your own life. You begin observing the brothers closely, forming opinions about each of them as if meeting them for the first time.
Matt’s gentle approach and Nick’s lighthearted humor put you at ease. They don’t ask much of you, simply treating you like a new friend. Matt always offers her snacks or a blanket when you look cold. Nick makes you laugh with his dramatic impressions and ridiculous stories about their childhood. You start to feel comfortable around them, appreciating their patience.
But Chris is different. He hovers but doesn’t speak as freely as his brothers. His glances linger too long, and when he does talk to you, it feels like he’s holding back an ocean of words. His intensity unnerves you.
You notice the way his face lights up when you enter the room, followed by a flicker of sadness when you avoid his gaze. There’s an ache in your chest you don't understand whenever he looks at you like that—like you're a ghost of the person he loves.
Chris, on the other hand, feels you slipping further away. He watches you laugh with Nick, sees the way you nod at Matt when he suggests watching a movie. But with him? You keep your answers short, your body stiff when he’s near. He can’t escape the thought that you feel safer with his brothers than with him.
-
Late one night, when the house is quiet and you and Nick have gone to bed, Chris finds himself sitting at the kitchen table with Matt. A single lamp illuminates the room, casting shadows that match the heaviness in his chest.
Matt notices the tension radiating from Chris and asks softly, “What’s going on in your head?”
Chris takes a shaky breath, his hands gripping the edge of the table. “I feel like I’m losing her, Matt,” he admits, his voice cracking. “She’s right here, but it’s like… she’s not her. Not the person I love. And what if she never comes back? What if she never remembers us—me?”
Matt sighs, leaning back in his chair. “Chris, you have to give her time. She’s been through something traumatic. You can’t force her to remember.”
Chris’s frustration boils over, and he stands abruptly, pacing the small kitchen. “I know that, Matt! But I feel like I’m grieving her, like she’s… gone.” His voice breaks completely, and he presses his palms to his face. “And what if she does remember? What if she remembers and doesn’t love me anymore? What if she decides I’m not worth it?”
Matt rises from his seat, his voice calm but firm. “Stop. You can’t think like that. Y/N loved you before the accident, and that kind of love doesn’t just disappear. But you have to stop putting all this pressure on yourself—and on her.”
Chris shakes his head, tears slipping down his cheeks. “I don’t know how to do this, Matt. I don’t know how to watch her move on like I don’t exist.”
Upstairs, you stir awake. You’ve been restless for weeks, haunted by dreams of faces you don't fully recognize and feelings you can’t explain. The muffled sound of voices downstairs catches you attention, and you tiptoe to the staircase, careful not to wake Nick.
You crouch on the top step, just out of sight, and listen. Chris’s voice is raw, filled with pain.
“I’d give anything—anything—for her to look at me the way she used to. To remember all the little things, like how she used to steal my hoodies or the way she’d hum that stupid song when she was nervous. Now she doesn’t even want to be in the same room as me.”
Your breath catches. Your chest tightens painfully, and you press a hand over your heart, confused by the sudden wave of emotion.
Matt’s voice cuts through her thoughts. “You need to stop blaming yourself, Chris. The accident wasn’t your fault.”
“But it was,” Chris insists, his voice trembling. “We were arguing. I wasn’t paying attention, and now—” He chokes on his words, gripping the back of a chair as if it’s the only thing holding him up. “I hurt her. I ruined everything.”
Your mind reels. You feel an ache you can’t place, as if your body remembers something your brain can’t. Chris’s words echo in your ears, pulling at a part of you that feels familiar and foreign all at once.
Back in your room, you sit on her bed, staring at the faint glow of moonlight on the wall. Chris’s voice plays in your mind on repeat. The desperation, the love, the guilt—it all feels so… real.
You wrap your arms around yourself, trying to make sense of the strange ache in your chest. “Why do I feel like this?” you whisper to yourself.
Your eyes wander to the hoodie draped over your chair—Chris’s hoodie. You don't remember how you got it, but something about it feels safe. You hesitate before grabbing it, slipping it over your head. The scent is faint but comforting, like a memory just out of reach.
As you lie back down, the fabric bunching around you, you feel something stir deep within you. You don't understand it yet, but for the first time, you don't feel quite so alone.
And for the first time, you wonder if there’s more to Chris’s pain than you’ve allowed yourself to see.
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shorter chapter im sorryyyyy things have been crazy with the holidays!
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@mattsdillon @hesvoid3434 @admeliora94 @courta13
#sturniolo#sturniolo x reader#chris sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo fandom
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Maybe the single life is for me
#slight??? rant incoming#but like I see people in relationships and get sad and miss being in one myself#then I remember everyone I’ve dated has been men#and I have not been treated right by a single one#and I actually hate when people who are happy and in a relationship tell me ‘you’ll get there soon’ because how the fuck do you know#and I am happy for people#I am.#but I hate how lonely I feel#then again I remember how freeing it is to be single#like I literally don’t have to worry about anybody or anything#but also I can’t pretend I don’t want to be yearned for? I don’t want to be chased? even just a little bit??#anyway I’ll stop before I make myself sad#jade speaks
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today, my coworkers’ refusal to see me as a man put one of our patients in a position where they felt unsafe for the third time. i’ve been at this job for less than two months total. i don’t even care about getting misgendered anymore, i just want the people we’re supposed to be taking care of to feel comfortable around me.
i work at a hospital where we have to supervise our patients in a lot of vulnerable situations. there are safeguarding rules in place for certain things that male employees aren’t allowed to be present for when it comes to female patients. and yet, the people training me and telling me what to do have repeatedly put me in situations where i’ve been forced to do things that the female patients aren’t comfortable with me doing. and because they have repeatedly failed to teach me the rules for doing my job as a man, i have no way of knowing when i’m crossing one of those lines unless one of the patients tells me.
i’ve had to watch a victim of SA stare at me in abject terror as my coworkers asked her to strip naked with me still in the room. it took several minutes for her to even be able to speak enough to ask if i could leave the room. i found out after that she broke down crying the moment i walked out. my biggest regret is that i didn’t realize what was happening fast enough to leave before she ever had to say something, because she shouldn’t have had to say it. i never should’ve been allowed in the room in the first place, because that’s not something male employees are supposed to be present for. but i didn’t know that yet, because i was training and i thought surely, they wouldn’t train me to do something that directly violated their own safeguarding rules. that moment was the first time, and it’s haunted me ever since, but it wasn’t the last time. not only did it happen for the third time today — it almost happened for the fourth, and would have if someone hadn’t spoken up to say they should pick someone else. i care for these people so deeply, it’s why i took this job, and i’m so tired of hearing the fear in their voices when they have to ask me not to do something i never should’ve been told to do.
i’m very used to the personal discomfort of being misgendered. i willingly deal with it a lot at work as well as in other situations, not because i’m in the closet (at this point in my medical transition that would be impossible), but because it’s such a frequent occurrence with my coworkers that we would never get anything done if i took the time to correct them every time. but to see it get to the point of causing such visceral discomfort in other people? people i’m supposed to be taking care of and keeping safe? that’s something else entirely, and i’m fucking exhausted.
and after all of that, some of them still look at me like i have two heads when they tell me what to do and i say “i can’t do that, only female employees can” because i’m learning now. clearly i’m already seen as a man by our patients, but my coworkers would still rather put them in an unsafe situation than just train me as a man.
#to be clear it’s four different things they’ve asked me to do that im not supposed to#as soon as i find out about one rule they ask me to violate a different one that i didn’t know about#i will never ever forget that girl’s face and i’ll never stop being angry for her#for all three of them but especially her#i hate my coworkers for a million different reasons#the patients are the only reason i didn’t quit this job after the first day#i just want to do right by them and sometimes it feels like i’m the only one working there who does#it kills me because the patients who know im trans have been so great about it too#most of them know nothing about trans people but they’re so willing to learn and so respectful and we’ve had such great conversations#they’re getting fucked over by someone else’s transphobia when they themselves don’t have a single transphobic bone in their bodies#i hate this place because i care about the people in it too much to stand by the way it treats them and it’s killing me#transandrophobia#transandromisia#transmisandry#virilmisia#virilphobia#anti transmasculinity#transmascphobia
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*cracks knuckles* Okay lets talk about the elephant in the room: Style going to the support group for those who've suffered loss and telling what appears to be a fake story about losing his pet dog.
I'm going to point out a few things that I think provide a framework for Style's actions here. Not because I think it excuses what he did, but because I think a nuanced read is what the character deserves.
Point 1: An irresistible opportunity
The subs put the "Support Group for Loss" on the image in the notebook, but I'm not sure there's anything to suggest that Style would've known that was what this image represents until he showed up and saw the sign on top of the door.
In episode 2, Bison says, "He plans everything down from years, months, weeks to days" and then tells Kant:
So Style is literally just going to addresses/locations at given days and times, potentially not knowing what to expect. And as much as Fadel is certainly attending this meeting as a response to having that heartbreaking flashback (😭), this is also something he attends regularly and has planned to attend way in advance. So Style has no reason to think Fadel is attending this meeting because of a recent resurfacing of his pain.
What we, the audience, and what the characters know are very different things.
Now, should Style have turned his cute ass right around once he realised what this meeting was? Of course he should. But that wouldn't have been true to Style's character. We've been told by his best friend that he is "crazy" and been shown repeatedly that he lives right up to that description.
Style is impulsive. He's all base instinct and he acts on his desires without thought or contemplation. And by this point he is desperate for a deeper connection with Fadel. He's fascinated, captivated by the mystery that is Fadel and this is an excellent opportunity to finally see behind the wall Fadel so carefully maintains.
When Style sees the sign above the door, Style looks at the notebook (which, again, shows nothing but people sitting in a circle with the words RISE UP) like he's just realising what it means. He then gets this amused, almost rueful look on his face (like he's thinking "am I really going to do this?") before it shifts to determination and he walks through the door.
(My soul for the ability to once again gif something because FUCK Dunk is doing SO MUCH in this show!!)
To Style, this is just too good of an opportunity to give up.
Because let's be real, Fadel is so clearly lying and hiding something:
Fadel is shady as FUCK. He is simultaneously actually a really good cook (Style finally tries his burger so he knows, now), and also has the skills to work at a strip host club, and also can take on 3 guys in a fight, and also can break a man's arm with his thighs. Can you honestly blame Style for losing his mind just a little bit about wanting to get his hands on something, anything, to figure this man out?
Style is being absolutely consistent in his persistence to understand Fadel. This isn't about the car or about finally 'winning' the fight (thank you @airenyah for giving such a detailed framework to understand what Style's been doing until this point) anymore. This is about Style wanting to know Fadel himself.
Point 2: The potential implications of the setting
Now, what might give us a bit of insight as to why Style is this way? I have a theory (albeit one that could prove to be very wrong, but hear me out). I think this whole entire show is set in what could potentially be quite a small town/suburb.
There's a few things that make this theory plausible:
(1) Fadel and Bison are in hiding after Bison blew their previous cover. They're probably on the run from some section of the authorities and so it makes sense to settle in a quiet/out of the way place.
(2) Style seems to be really familiar with the people in the area. Like he grew up there and its the kind of small town where everyone knows everyone and everyone is in everyone else's business.
(3) Style is clearly the darling of the market aunties and uncles.
Style just lost her a sale and potentially a loyal customer, and she's still rooting for him? In episode 2, when Style asks the uncle to let him borrow his cart, it takes nothing but his word for the uncle to give Style his entire cart of produce for his ridiculous scheme.
Style is so clearly someone they all know well and have great affection for, and a very plausible explanation for this is that they all watched him grow up and the entire market (town/village) is fond of him.
And honestly?? Yeah, we see the way Style is actually quite sweet in that careless, guileless, thoughtless way. He goes the extra mile to fix his mistake with Fadel by replacing his car parts for free in episode 1. He helps out by taking orders in episode 2 without being asked and takes it seriously. In episode 3, he tries to drive more business to Fadel's store (bless him, he so clearly does NOT understand how restaurants work, but he MEANS well!!), and can we all acknowledge that it works?? He understands how to appeal to potential customers in the area because he knows the people there. It's not (entirely) his fault that Fadel wasn't remotely prepared for an actual rush crowd and Bison was off getting kinky with Kant and not doing his (fake) job. He is so clear about not judging Fadel's host job and tries his hardest to help him (to absolutely NO effect, but still) when the 3 guys gang up on Fadel.
Style is so loved and more importantly so very loveable.
Point 3: What this could mean for Style's character
So, potentially, Style is someone who grew up in a small town, who has been well loved, potentially spoiled and coddled, but also very much kept within the confines of the narrow viewpoint that a quiet, country town places on you.
It's in the way his dad scolds him as if he was still a child when he's at least in his mid to late 20s. It's in the way Style was so mad at Fadel for scolding him ("thanks for the lecture, dad"), like that hit a sore point for Style. It's in the way no one in the market takes him seriously; they're fond, but he's still a kid in their eyes. It's in the way he has an abundance of free time like he doesn't REALLY need to work at his dad's shop. It's in the way he sees Fadel beat 3 guys up with ease, starts wondering if Fadel is an assassin or a hitman, and is completely unfazed like he doesn't quite have a handle on reality.
It's in the way his best friend is a man who has no qualms about lying to him and putting his life in danger, and how Style seems to have no other friends or people (aside from his dad) in his life.
@wuxian-vs-wangji made a comment to me about Style being desperate for a meaningful connection, and I think she hit the nail on the head. Because along comes Fadel, a mysterious stranger with a suspiciously versatile set of skills who is also very hot and keeps giving Style these wonderfully complex reactions? Who sometimes wants nothing to do with Style, but at other times seems to be at war within himself about desperately wanting him? Who treats Style with anything but apathy?
This is catnip to Style; he never had any hope of resisting this.
Breaking news: Style is a complex and imperfect character...
Here's the thing, though: he was never going to try. The show has been incredibly upfront about who Style is as a person. Regardless of whether I'm correct about why he is this way (ie. that he is very much the product of the environment that didn't know how to handle a kid with Style's personality), episode 3 shouldn't have surprised anyone about Style. He's been incredibly consistent and true to himself.
He wants Fadel and he's "crazy" enough to go all in, no holds barred about it, and the Support Group was the biggest doorway to finally discovering something REAL about Fadel.
And its not just about sex or to prove his superiority anymore. Because if it was just that, then Style would have reacted very differently to their first time.
In this scene, Style is pleased and evidently enjoying himself, but he isn't exuberant. He isn't overcome with joy. If anything, he was more happy and excited when Fadel let him help out in the diner (I mentioned this in the tags in this post too) than he was when Fadel is literally fucking him. He lets Fadel set the pace; barely moves to touch Fadel except to hold him close. Almost like he doesn't want to accidentally mess this up, like he's worried he'll take too much, so he'll take what Fadel gives him and no more (please appreciate @braceletofteeth's amazing tags on this post). For a character that has been so aggressively on the offensive, this is shocking until you realise that sleeping with Fadel - while it's a step in the right direction - isn't Style's end goal anymore.
And he makes that abundantly clear in this episode:
Does Style even fully realise the weight of this desire? I doubt it. But I do believe that Style is in earnest. He doesn't fully understand his own feelings, but he also doesn't really care to either. All he knows is that he wants Fadel, wants his attention and his passion and his focus and his heart.
...but Style is also kind of, sort of, perfect.
Because he's exactly, precisely, breathtakingly exactly what Fadel needs.
Because Fadel is hurt and broken and bleeding inside. Because Fadel is barely holding it all together for Bison's sake, but has already given up hope for any true happiness for himself. Because Fadel can't trust anyone or anything in his life, when he's been used and used and used by the family who should've loved and cared and protected him.
Because it's going to take nothing short of this kind of unwavering, unshakable, uncomplicated determination to give Fadel even a chance of healing and opening his heart to love again.
#<my posts>#saw a post about style being one-dimensional and boring and I nearly had a breakdown because what are you TALKING about???#he's so perfectly messed up and terrible and unfiltered and WONDERFUL in all the wrong and right ways#and others have pointed out there's potentially even MORE to style's backstory because of the “coincidence” of Lilly meeting with#someone with the same name as the dog Style talks about in his story#listen the story telling in this show drives me inSANE in the best way and i'm baffled at some of the takes i'm seeing#can we at least... let his story play out maybe before dismissing or hating on Style?? its literally ONLY episode 3.#anyway yes its me your resident style apologist back to be unnecessarily emotional about style again#the heart killers the series#thk meta#the heart killers#style sattawat#fadelstyle#also FUCK ME dunk is just constantly serving every single episode and i've seen so many posts appreciating joong's acting (RIGHTLY SO!)#but not nearly enough love for the frankly INSANE performance dunk has been giving every single episode#i love him i love him I LOVE HIM SO MUCH OKAY T_T#dunk natachai#ALSO (not that this means i can speak for everyone in a similar circumstance)#but as someone who lost my father to cancer as a teenager i DO understand and relate to the FURY Fadel must have felt in ep 3#and i DO think style was wrong to have treated the situation so lightly#but like literally WHAT in this show sets up any expectation for style to have the emotional maturity to do that?#and also this doesn't make him an inherently bad person ACTUALLY#it makes him an idiot and needing to be taught the right way to respond to people who are grieving. but guess what; he's NOT ALONE??#because let me tell you the amount of times i wanted to punch FULL GROWN ADULTS for giving me “well meaning” platitudes at my dad's funeral#...but the thing is they DID mean well. they just didn't realise how hurtful their words were#and life is filled with imperfect people who make mistakes and part of our journey is learning from them and trying our best to be kind
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Sometimes i remember a comics moment i randomly came across somewhere, where Sam Wilson mentiones a musical and Steve Rodgers says he doesn't like musicals, to whitch Sam goes "Guess that means you really are straight" and even tho i don't care about Cap America or the Avengers, the moment stuck in me for that quote by Sam. And like....Sci, any ideas if straight men actually don't like musicals or is that bullshit?
actually i think i know more gay men who hate musicals than i know straight men who hate musicals. i've had a drag queen stop me point blank when i was about to sing a barbra streisand song, and i know so many gays who pointedly hate abba. so based on my experience i think the inverse is true. most of the straight men i know are kind of impartial about musicals, but gay men? hate.
my theory is that a lot of gay men don't want to fall into stereotypes, maybe. but thaaaaat's just a theory! a gay theory.
#sci speaks#i'm trying to understand the gays. they are a mystery to me.#i've seen a lot more toxic masculinity coming from gay men than i have from straight men.#i think it makes sense. they have less women in their lives. so they reckon with a lot more masculinity. more dick measuring.#also gay men have some of THE most unhealthy romantic relationships i've ever seen in my life.#this isn't a blanket statement on everyone but just from what i've seen. it's such a strange pattern i've observed.#lesbians? healthy. straights? usually healthy. gay men? universally a tire fire that makes me say “if you hate each other so much ??”#“why are you together??????????”#i have never met a cis gay mlm couple in real life that was healthy. every single one of them made my eyes widen in horror.#i want them to be healthy. please treat each other better.#the number of bitchy bitchy fights i've seen between mlm couples in public that make me so terrified#but i know mlm relationships in general are usually less... affectionate than wlw relationships. even and especially friendships.#just an observation.#i hate to say that there is a definite difference between amab vs afab experiences when it comes to relationship dynamics but.#of course there is. there is. as much as i want to say gender and sex do not matter. it really does.#it makes a difference. it does.#which is kind of why i'm glad i was born in the body i was. when people say “trans means you feel you were born in the wrong body”#im like.. i don't think that's true. i don't think that's true for me.#i wouldn't be me if i wasn't born the way i was. and i want to be me. but i'm a boy. i'm a boy but in the body that i have.#my body is still a boy's body. because i live in here.#sorry this went off on a tangent.#but yeah i know my brain would be different if i was amab. and i don't want all those other issues.#i think the only reason i'm so peaceful and serene is because i'm afab. and afabulous.#i see cis guys and im like.. yeah i don't want what you got.#once again! lucky to be me! i'm lucky. im lucky i have a vargooba. thank fuck for that!#couldve been so much worse off. could've been born with a dick and would be fighting for my life right now.
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finally watched happiest season and i totally understand why people hated the ending.
except for Jane. she deserves the world.
#like it’s not even about harper not being ready to come out#that’s totally her prerogative#but it doesn’t absolve her for how she treats people around her#first with riley holy fuck - and it’s implied she never even apologised to her in the years after???#with that ‘understanding’ they have towards the end#riley would have been completely within her rights to not accept that menial discussion as water under the bridge#but anyway the way harper also treats abby is downright cruel at times#the bit that got me the most was her gaslighting abby the morning after she was out all night#poor girl was just trying to make sure she wasn’t awfully hungover and gets accused of smothering her??? tf???#i really wanted harper to have something to redeem her but she just didn’t#a great moment for her would have been that chat outside the bar with her ex boyfriend#like she didn’t have to out herself entirely but she could have at least said something#she doesn’t make a single effort until it’s way too late and she got outed (like okay fair that was a horrible thing to happen to her)#but honestly i think abby should have still walked away after it#like ‘i’m happy you can be your true self now but for us it’s over’#abby definitely had far more chemistry with riley (stereotype yayaya idc)#but i don’t think they should have gotten together at the end necessarily#maybe just them deciding to keep in touch or something and THEN it happens later#like in that year forward or something - riley and abby are together and they run into harper who’s happy and moved on idk#ALSO CAN WE TALK ABOUT JANE#girlypop finally got her moment and i’m so glad they didn’t make out her book was awful just cause she was writing it for ten years#like we saw how good that painting was??#when girly puts her heart in something she’s all in#cause nobody was all in on her AND SHE DESERVES THE WORLD#honestly one of the few good characters and i’m glad she at least got a good ending#also also why you gonna cast aubrey plaza and barely give her any screen time#like pls make it make sense#haven’t gone off like that in tags for a hot minute™️#happiest season
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local silly goofer was seething with rage and dumped it all in the tags, read at your own risk :3 <- personal stuff, wrote this after the tags, pretty okay now, just got it out of my system, love yall <3<3<3
#BITE BITE BITE RAGE RAGE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#<- same old same old ITS BEEN A FREAKING WHILE#my dad is so infuriating yall :D#i dont have it in me to hate him but boi? HES TRYING!!!!!#like; do you HEAR YOURSELF??? IS A SINGLE WORD THATS COMING FROM YOUR MOUTH BEING PROCESSED BY YOUR BRAIN????#YOU PRIDE YOURSELF IN ALWAYS BEING THE SMARTEST ONE IN THE ROOM#sure; intelligence wise; probably; but emotionally? a speck of dust outnumbers you-#WINNING AN ARGUMENT FOR THE SAKE OF BEING RIGHT WITHOUT REGARD FOR ANYONE ELSE-#THINKING EVERYONE SHOULD BE AS COLD AS YOU; AND IF THEYRE NOT; IF GOD FORBID THEY SHOW TOO MUCH EMOTION#THEN PHYSICAL ABUSE IS JUSTIFIED??#THAT´S NOT A GOOD FUCKING ARGUMENT!!!!#NOT EVERY ARGUMENT HAS TO BE WON; YOU DONT ALWAYS NEED THE UPPER HAND!!!!#the shitty way you were treated and raised should not be my fucking problem and i hope you get therapy about it#and then i´ll regret not being closer to him whenever he dies; but hes making it unmeasurably hard to consider being vulnerable#AGHHH-#this man has never apologized for a single thing is his damn life btw :3!#vent#*inhale*#sorry yall i´m good; just full of rage rn :D!#i spilled a cup of juice at church today and things got waay out of hand lmaoo
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Fandom be normal about bi women challenge (impossible. apparently.)
#look. I too am tired of (white) men getting praised for the bare minimum#but you all do realize that sometimes women do genuinely fall in love with men right#that women are capable of making their own decisions about who they date right#this is one of the reasons that I hate the 'genuinely I hate every single individual man' rhetoric#because so many times it goes hand in hand with this infantilization of women who are attracted to men#it's like 'oh these poor girls trapped in their attraction to men' and then like...treating them as if they are incapable of making informe#choices? like they're just inherently doomed to gravitate toward awful men because they Don't Know Any Better and are#Brainwashed By Society??? please tell me you understand why treating women as if they are too stupid to make their own decisions#is just misogyny again. you understand that right. RIGHT.#'why would you CHOOSE to date a man instead of doing the RESPONSIBLE and PROGRESSIVE and REVOLUTIONARY thing and date a woman!'#because sometimes. women fall in love with men. you can't. you can't will love into existence. you can't control who you fall in love with.#and people-if it's feasible-tend to want to commit to someone they have actual feelings for. what's not clicking here.#(and yes obviously this is a niche-queer-spaces-specific problem people don't have discourse about this in this way irl like the#general population isn't telling me I should only ever be attracted to women and date one solely For The Cause they don't want me#to be interested in women at all. that doesn't stop me from being annoyed every time I see said niche-space-specific ''''take'''')#it's especially confusing to me when BISEXUAL PEOPLE are like this about other bisexual people. like you of all people. should know#how maligned we are from multiple conflicting angles#In the Vents#biphobia#like I know I talk SO much about women and how I want to marry one but that genuinely is just because historically I have been more#attracted to women than men. if I meet a man I click with and fall in love with then hell yeah I'm gonna date him and be happy about it.#I'm not opposed to that outcome at all. but heaven forbid I ever say that lmao
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it's nice that we're getting anything i guess, but, i'm gonna be what may come off as a little petty and whiny here; it'd be cool if either iteration of the gen 9 anime so far was actually about gen 9's characters instead of using them as cameos to promote original stories we have no investment in yet
it's like, i dunno, like the bait and switch with sonic appearing in wreck it ralph ads, except if wreck it ralph existing meant there would never be a sonic movie, and if you were invested in those characters and recognized they weren't generic platformer mascots, sucks for you, nobody cares
maybe they're just giving the DLC space to do its thing with them first (if they do anything at all...) but idk, i was cautiously optimistic about nemona in horizons, only for her to be a character of the day that the episode wasn't about, and pretty excited by "gen 9 prequel anime" only to find out it's going to be like, four short stories about OCs who have quick brushes with them. these are like the lacroix hint of what an anime about the game could've been like and you're left to imagine the rest yourself
i shouldn't be that surprised if the gen 8 anime reduced hero of galar hop to a character of the day with a level 5 wooloo in order to let the galaxy revolve around ash battling his brother because epic charizards, but man. what if it wasn't like that that now that ash is gone.
we haven't seen penny and team star at all because they're the hardest to talk about without bringing up the trauma of school bullying and the fear of being yourself at school when you're way too young to be dealing with all that drama responsibly. she's still learning to love and forgive herself and feel wanted.
arven's story is about, like, being a latchkey kid to a self-absorbed parent, being unsure how to feel about repairing the relationship or how seriously to take them saying they love him, and struggling to make friends due to misdirected resentment toward people he's jealous of for having apparently normal families and the stubborn self-reliance he was forced into. he's still trying to process things, find himself, and let people in.
nemona is supposed to have been a directionless lonely and depressed kid who hated being called gifted when everything was hard for her, until she met the player character and gained a peer who understood and appreciated she was a little different and she didn't have to mask her true self to have friends anymore. she's happy for now, but may still be under a little too much pressure to be perfect at the expense of her own personality, and probably won't deal well with being abandoned.
as much as they resonate with adults and are a little darker than usual pokemon fare, they're also smaller scale and realer. they are all stories that are explicitly about and meant to be relatable to kids going to school! y'know, your audience! you don't need to paint over them with 3-4 new characters and new stories every time like there was nothing there, or something shameful you need to sanitize and cover up! you can just use the game the way it is!
this got a little more heated than i intended, i just feel a little ridiculous waiting anxiously for loose scraps of a sign that this story isn't over and in the trash already and nemona's life-changing attachment to the player character isn't going to go totally ignored, as we are bombarded with what is supposed to be followup material that almost all seems eager to talk about literally anything else like they think the main story was a mistake they need to run away from
now, i'm not one to complain about original stories being told, but this was already a story that had room to grow. imagine a world where the gen 9 anime was actually about nemona, arven, penny, and the friend who brought them together. or what their lives were like before that friend came along. every episode. that would get me to watch the anime again and whatever movie came out for it. ask yourself why we don't have that, or even the traditional, like, 1-2 characters tagging along with the MCs per region thing that would leave us knowing them better than we know some irl friends
how was starting over with 100% original characters and new lore that might conflict hard with the upcoming DLC the safer bet? why is a 44 minute miniseries specifically for fans of the game making up OCs for them to get invested in and scrambling to tell their stories as quickly as possible before throwing them in the trash instead of being about the damn game?
sigh. i shouldn't get invested in a series that's about selling monster plushies just because it had one story that stuck with me
#paldean winds seems to mostly be making fun of the infodumping fat pokemon nerd character until he gets his own episode#y'know. the one that represents a lot of their viewers#while nemona is right there outside the window hyping up little kids about battles as usual because they don't hate her like her peers#honestly her overhearing the conversation and looking a little uncomfortable about it would've been a good touch#confirmation that the subtext i noticed is actually considered part of the canon and not a happy accident they'll never talk about again#something i have only gotten from pokemon masters so far#pokemon sv#pokemon#nemonaposting#pokemon scarvi#pokemon scarlet and violet#yada yada ten million other tags#'well at least there's the manga' the manga that inserted its own wacky main character that will probably also revolve around him#idk that one could still be good but it's also an AU and not the versions of the characters i'm invested in if that makes sense#i've been begging for pokemon to feel in touch with its audience forever and as soon as it is they treat it like a hot potato#i feel fucking obsessed because of how long this tease has been stretching on for no good reason#they could've just let us ACTUALLY hang out with the friend trio in vanilla postgame and shown them in the DLC a single time#and i could have had a normal social media presence for the past 3-6 months#instead of dreaming about a pokemon npc last night because of how little faith i have in her getting any justice outside of a fucking gacha#i am so sorry that this is who i am now except for the 2-3 of you who follow me specifically because i post these things#pennyposting#arvenposting
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