#and ALL of you are part of that joy.
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Me, at all the askers, likers and sneaky-sneak stalkers, etc of this blog:
(( /p obvs! ))
Sorry! I'm gonna get super mushy and emotional for a minute, guys.
(( ps. I get really mushy in the tags... so... yeah. cheese warning I guess for my emotions, haha? ))
Y'all give a fair amount of purpose to my life, and I would not have been as overall okay as I am right now if it weren't for this blog.
Y'all have partially SAVED ME.
This BLOG has partially SAVED ME.
Honestly, it's been helping me more than I think anyone other than ME would really know.
#REGARDS: MOD 💜 💙#not asks#mod gets mushy and emotional#thank you#really thank you#like with how my mental health has been sometimes this blog was the ONLY thing keeping me from drowning in my own head#and i would've if it wasn't for ALL OF YOU sending asks or simply just existing here to encourage me#y'all will never have a good idea of how much i appreciate you#because this blog is basically keeping me alive at the moment#it's the one consistent source of joy I have right now.#and ALL of you are part of that joy.#all of you are part of why I'm still surviving.#and seriously. thank you.
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today i love the red metal crane in her long neck arching her body over the boston skyline, which means i am okay for a moment. when i am unwell, everything is a little ugly. i always tell myself look for the beauty but when it is bad, i will look at birds and sunsets and little ducklings and feel absolutely nothing.
when my brother got his puppy, i was in a deep depression. what kind of monster isn't affected by a puppy. i was gentle and kind to her - i just didn't have an emotional reaction. she's five now and i feel like i spend all of our interactions apologizing to her - i don't know why. i just didn't feel anything. how embarrassing. i feel like if i admit that, i'll seem cruel and jaded. it comes in waves. like, two months ago when i went out into the world - it was like that. life behind a pane of stormglass. a firework could go off over your head - nothing. like dead skin, no reaction. not to ice cream or rainbows or baby chickens. life foggy and uninteresting.
i love goslings again. i love their little webbed feet splayed over grass. i love good food and live music and long walks. i like puppies. i feel like some kind of my soul has been starved - i keep staring at everything with wide eyes, trying to burrow the sensation into my stomach. it's real. beauty is real. when it's bad again, remember this. i stop and smell the flowers, feeling cliche in the moment. i like the white-to-red ombre of my neighbor's roses. i like colorcoding and yoga and cold drinks. i try to pass my hands over every moment, feeling like i'm squeezing joy out of every instant. remember this. for the love of god, it's real - just remember this.
#and yet i NEVER DO REMEMBER IT#spilled ink#writeblr#i feel like due to tiktok ppl think >#deeply depressed & not having an emotional reaction to things MUST mean#you are cruel or uncaring#like girlie that is STILL a lack of mental illness awareness. it doesn't make us mean#it just means im like. ohhhh im not well. i don't really react to puppies. that's bad#Im still gonna be super nice to the puppy. like it just doesn't bring me joy.#bc the problem i have is CLINICAL. the dopamine ISNT being made.#but PLENTY of us are still kind#considerate.#GENTLE people. even if we're like '..........' all the time.#i actually think this is why i'm harsh on people who are so mean - you don't need to be emotionally attached to someone/thing#in order to be kind.... you just choose to be kind bc it's the right thing to do#not bc it's easy....... like it's extra effort sure. but it's worth it. bc ppl deserve kindness.#it's hard to describe this bc it's the ugly side of depression. the part that's like#not in netflix - the part where it's like ''i love this person. i just don't feel anything''
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More stress than peaceful moments in my life lately, need a puppy eyes Nate ❤
#nate sewell#twc nate#the wayhaven chronicles#sorry didn't have the time for full colors#I need more free time to draw what I love (╥﹏╥)#sketch dump#my art#(actually it's a part of a comic I will probably never finish)#a big thank you to all of you still visiting my blog#even if I don't post as much as before..#it's always a great joy to share with you ❤
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he is just too dangerous | for @rjshope
{cr: namuspromised}
#bts#btsgif#dailybts#btsedit#hoseok#jung hoseok#bts hoseok#rékagif#tw flashing lights#dasha my darling!!! its your birtday today - such a wonderful day because someone as beautiful as you was born#i am so thankful for ur presence here you are so important for all of us and i truly wish i could do more for you to express what u are to#*me and what ur friendship mean - but regardless i am thankful for your never ending support and love... you are such a huge part of this s#*site - thank you for being my friend - thank you for all the lovely conversations - thank you for bringing the light back into my dark lif#i wish you nothing but happiness - joy - laughter and a birthday as wonderful as you are! may all your dreams and wishes come true#i will say the rest in private but i love you!! and happy borthday once again!!!!!!
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Living together.
The snail video if you are interested :)
#showing random videos you found abt an animal fun fact is a love language if you didn't know btw#not understanding a topic and starting with drop out ideation is part of the journey when you are a student.#it evolves later (or simultaneously) with wanting to quit your job. in WW case both apply at the same time#vash is the kind of guy to really be marveled abt every little new piece of information he gets in his hands#and the 1st person he thinks abt to share his knowledge and joy with is ofc ww#the fact that they live together only amplified this by a thousand#ww tends to hear him out and also watch more videos with him. rn he's too busy weighing studying vs quitting#I really enjoyed drawing Vash in the bg for this one he's so cute#i hope its noticeable how much fun i am having by putting them through all of this.#why didn't i do this more since earlier???#aesthetics be damned. put them THROUGH -IT-#trigun#vash the stampede#trigun stampede#nicholas d wolfwood#vashwood#trigun fanart#vash#wolfwood#nicholas trigun#lenssi draws#Trigun Uni! AU#made some very light changes that were bothering only me specifically. you might not notice IWDFJK
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Happy Birthday to Fallen London; My favourite British people beefing it with bats simulator.
#fallen london#ambition: nemesis#mr.cups#Happy belated birthday to me: I finished my Nemesis ambition. I get to make a fun comic about it. THAT WAS THE DEAL!!!#...Is what I would have said had I not spent *four* days trying to draw a cool dramatic comic. This is all I have to show for it.#I also missed posting this on the Flondon anniversary so I'm double Smad and frustippointed at myself.#This is niche content but I know there are flondoners following me who will understand.#I had to make a second account because all my friends who I played with *also* picked Nemesis and dropped the game at various gates.#I failed every possible check at Knifegate. I was on the verge of madness. And yet I still love this game.#Little known secret about me: over 70% of the blogs I follow on tumblr are flondon rp blogs.#The cool art and character lore brings me a lot of joy!#With that said; what the hell is the coincidence that right as I finish Nemesis -#The flondon community starts a Nemesis Race.#Guys. it’s not worth it. It is a revenge quest about losing everything you have to see your task through.#All to culminate in the discovering that you are beefing it with a fanfiction writing bat.#That said; I do feel like this story was very satisfying for my melancholic doctor.#I knew I would get the choice between sparing or killing my nemesis (the bat) and I had a long time to think it through.#Someone who wants to save lives and (does as much as possible to do make things better for others) choosing against mercy?#Someone who never permitted themselves to let the city truly become a home because they were not a person - they were a tool for grief.#Alright..Yeah the ending was really good.#I will be back with a part two. Clearly I'm tenacious enough to commit to what I started.#If I am not excommunicated on sight by the flondon community I will be back with comics for the other ambitions.
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coming back home.
@barrenclan
#patfw#patfw fanart#patfw spoilers#rainhaze#THE NEW ISSUE. IT SURE WAS AN ISSUE HUH. I AM NORMAL. SO NORMAL IN FACT#THAT I REDREW A PANEL OF THE COMIC IN MS PAINT#i need someone to put this horrid beast down already. he needs to DIE i am not joking. euthanise him. please.#he is soooo fascinating.#i CANT get over his expression in this panel. WHAT IS WRONG WITH HIM#hes smiling .is it a genuine smile? is he smiling bc he knows how this is going to go and all he can do is laugh now?#why. why why why the smile. at first he looks shocked or surprised or terrified but THEN it turns into this playful soft grin. as if full o#nostalgia. or maybe grief. or maybe joy. he looks like he knows something we dont.#did he accept that his family is going to get wiped out (HIS FAULT HE KILLED HER HE RIPPED HER THROAT OUT) and is just happy he got to see#them one last time?#this is so weird. before killing asphodel he was so terrified of meeting them. of facing his past and acknowledging what he became.#is him smiling a symbol of him giving up? becoming part of defiance? hes not running away anymore. he doesnt have to.#jesus.#my art#wanted to make him look as fucked up as i could. i hope he looks like a corpse or perhaps a starved dog to you
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I just watched Wicked in theater and it was mesmerizing. Thank you so much ✨
#Wicked#Elphaba Thropp#Glinda Upland#As you may notice with my blog’s name I’m a huge fan of Wicked#this blog exists BECAUSE of Wicked#huge fan of the Musical and the Book#(the book destroyed me back then)#(I utterly recommend it)#and I’m so so happy about the movie#It bought me so much joy you have no idea#all my feels for Wicked are just coming to life again#can’t wait for the part 2#(and also fear the part 2.)#everyone should watch it#the movie needs all the love
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House M.D. but it's when a character says the name of the episode
#house md#prince's talk tag#flashing#repitition#so as i was watching this show i noticed they'd say the episode title in the episode#so i wanted to see how many times they did it#the people on livejournal who made transcripts of the episodes are my saviors and without them this would of been so much harder to do#thank you all for your service and i hope wherever you all are you're having a great day#sometimes they would use a variation of the word like in the episode poison they would say 'poisoned' or 'poisoning'#i did not include those instances#there was an instance in 'merry little christmas' where they do play the song in the show#but since ella fitzgerald was not a character in the show i did not include it#where as in the episode 'joy to the world' the students are singing it in the concert so i did include that#i apologize for the tonal whiplash when you get to that part but it did make me laugh#one of the times kutner says 'locked in' is overshadowed by the POTW's voice over but i assure you he says it and thats why its in there#out of the main characters from the one who said the title the most to least are#House > Foreman > Wilson > Chase > Cuddy > Adams > Cameron and Taub > Kutner > Thirteen and Park#this took a bit to do lolol its probably been done already but i wanted my own#there is a chance im missing some on technicalities but idc. im fine with this#there are two more i wanna do but with a character saying another character's name but ill do that some other time#EDIT: When I was making this video I was unaware that the Pilot episode went by two names: 'Pilot' and 'Everybody Lies'#Basically everywhere I looked the first episode was only referred to by 'Pilot'#which I found weird bc i remember seeing somewhere that the last episode was paired with the first episode in terms of title#but i couldn't find hard proof so I decided to leave it out at the time#well i checked again last night and yea the pilot IS also called Everybody Lies so I updated the video#I also think it goes well with the fact that House does say 'Everybody Dies' in the finale so another reason to fix it#AND he says it without Wilson while he and Wilson say the title of the pilot sooooo yea hehehehehe
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for anyone who has ever seen someone claim pansexual was coined on social media by teenagers in the early 2000s, the 2010s, and even in the past few years, and believed it or wondered if it’s true, or known it’s not true and been annoyed by the misinformation, this article is for you!
after listing out all of the claims i’ve seen, i succinctly debunk them by laying out a brief overview of pansexual’s history dating back to the 1960s, both as a term generally indicating universal appeal/inclusion and a term indicating sexual freedom/attraction to all genders. i include a look at pansexual’s use specifically within queer spaces, with a focus on bisexual spaces, as well.
i also touch briefly on omnisexual and polysexual existing in similar contexts to pansexual dating back to the 1960s. and finally, i discuss a little bit about how when, where, and by whom a label is created doesn’t determine the validity or usefulness of it, because these claims come with the implication that new labels, labels created by kids, and labels originating on social media aren’t legit forms of queer expression and identification.
happy pan week! 🥰💗💛💙
#pansexual#pansexuality#pan pride#pan positivity#pan week#medium#text#mine#and as always please remember that queer people have always played with language#and tweaked it until it worked for us and utilized what we felt seen by#and filled in the gaps with our own creations where we didn’t feel understood and left the rest#queer people expressing themselves in a way that feels authentic to them is always a good thing#truly don’t understand why the when where and by whom a label was created would matter more than someone feeling seen by a label#because while we’re talking about new labels made by kids online with regard to pansexual#so much of queer language has been reclaimed or repurposed from completely different (and often bigoted) origins#and people barely even acknowledge it. but suddenly the origin is crucial when it’s a label folks have a vendetta against#and listen. learning history is fun and important but we aren’t beholden to it.#we can have new meanings and uses and completely new words!!! it’s fine!!!! it’s not that serious!!!#maybe one day pansexual will fall completely out of use and people will find a different word to express it or something similar#and that’d be fine. and maybe one day after that someone will come across an old post about pansexuality and decide it speaks to them#and it will all happen again. and that will be fine. language is like that. self-identification is like that.#y’all take all of the fun and joy and excitement out of finding or creating language that perfectly captures how we feel#and then finding a community of people who feel the same way we do#y'all focus so much on the parts that don't matter. find your language find your people that's what matters#not finding something to use against someone else who feels seen by a word you don't feel seen by#anyways. pansexual isn't new. stop spreading lies because you care too much about things that don't matter
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I have an idea that includes two person love square because identity shenanigans are always fun, but I have no idea what they should do, despite having fun dynamics between them, like:
"Of course they're dating" said Public Opinion about Miss Martian and Phantom, right after she broke his heart a bit by telling him she was in love with someone else (Megan's long distance best friend, Danny). Before this happened, Phantom was overly flirtatious to both Miss Martian and Megan, so she asked Danny what to do about "This one guy in my sports team" and his advice is to tell him to "Fuck off". She does exactly that, without quite understanding the weight of the word and Phantom is stunned into obedience (and he understands that no means no)
Anyway, I need help with actual... plot. Situations I put them through, because I'm determined to write it. They would be cute together imo.
#I know I have other wips#they all fun ideas i'd love to work more on in the future#will it stop me from starting a new one?#nope#writer curse I guess#writer problems#please give me prompts ideas joke dialog#whatever you want#yes i'm a bit desperate#i recently finished relatively big fic for a bang and my writing brain demands more writing#and for some reason#this idea that I can't write is the only one that brings me any joy xD#dpxdc#dc x dp#dp x dc#dcxdp#have a nice day dear stranger who got to this part
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LALECHINGO!! ; a birthday event
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞��❥ it’s bingo! and also a raffle.
let’s party!! one thing about me is that is love a little event and since it’s my birthday month i felt like hosting one :3c
so: raffle time! but you gotta play some bingo first before you can participate. lemme give you a rundown on how it works.
what's the prize?
✰ a total of three 1k (or longer) fics from me! i don’t take requests so this is a rare chance to see something specific written by me ✰ the 3 winners will receive a wishlist form from me in which they can go wild ✰ haikyuu x reader only! gender of reader is for the winners to decide, i’ll write for all of them. ✰ not limited to sfw only (that being said: mdni)
details & rules (it looks like a lot, but i promise it's easy)
✰ to participate in the raffle, you gotta fill out the bingo cards! there’s ten of them in total at the end of this post. some are writing prompts, some are for reading, some to spread some kindness. you can grab and combine any that catch your interest.
✰ 1 bingo equals 1 point. if you manage to fill out an entire card, you’ll get 10 points, so 10x your name in the draw pot for the raffle. this means you can get up to 100 points in total if you fill out all ten cards completely.
✰ it’s not first come, first serve! you got two weeks to have fun with your bingo cards.
✰ this event is mostly about making fandom a little better for everyone, whether you’re a writer or a reader, no matter how you participate in it. this means you don’t have to show me proofs how you got these bingos. putting my trust in you that you won’t cheat <3
✰ since the prizes are gonna be fics by me, i would feel better knowing you actually like my works enough to follow me. however, it’s not a must to be a follower to participate. again, it’s more about fandom than me.
✰ writers picking up the writing prompts: it up to you how you use them! can be drabbles or headcanons, small fics, big fics, moodboards, not limited to haikyuu only. really whatever sparks your inspiration. you don’t even have to publish it or tag me in it (though i’d love to see ofc hehe), this is for YOU and your inspiration.
✰ do NOT bring any ai into this. i'll rip you to shreds
✰ once you’re finished, either reblog this post with your bingo cards or send me an ask with them (i won’t publish them, just for me to keep track)
✰ i’ll draw & announce the three winners on Jan 27th and will contact them through dms for their wishlist :3
card 1-6 ; for the writers
card 7 & 8 ; for the readers
card 9 & 10 ; for the kindness
that's all! have fun ♡ - Lale
#hq x reader#haikyuu x reader#-`♡´- lalechingo#← filter this one if you don't wanna see any of it on your dash. no hard feelings <3#ps: your girl's an aquarius so no early bday wishes please lmao#also i'll ramble in the tags so bear with me. this is actually my dream event so there's that#i've rotated this one in the back of my mind for a long time and i'm feeling a little shy releasing it into the wild now#but i'm being very brave about it!! (me when i lie)#you see. one thing about me is that i love giving people a little homework. but also to make it a little silly bc what else is there to do#trying to make fandom the place i want it to be. by no means i believe i can do that on my own but i can try by doing my part right?#also big kiss to ellie who came up with the name for this and is a constant source of reassurance and joy ily <33#same for the peeps in the server who let me ramble about this idea and hyped me tf up for it!#this idea also saw the light because of you all. ily all thanks for being these amazing souls that you are <3#told myself i wouldn't get sappy in the tags but oh well. hi hello gang can you hold my hand while i cry pls#anyway. let's play some fucking bingo my guys!!
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MACBETH // DUNE PART ONE & DUNE PART TWO
There's more of course. Prophecies. Visions of daggers and talking babies, etc
#Dune#Dune Part 2#macbeth#shakespeare#dune part two#Timothee Chalamet#Rebecca Ferguson#Anya Taylor Joy#Paul Atreides#Muad'Dib#Usul#Alia Atreides#Jessica Atreides#Denis Villeneuve#Frank Herbert#feyd#feyd x paul#austin butler#witches & space witches#is Duncan Idaho named after the King in Macbeth? Pure character & all that good stuff plus you know Frank kinda gives him a happy ending et
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m23 was really just a whole kaishin date
#kaishin#this kaishin date movie really cockblocked avengers lol#dc prattles#also shinichi you didnt have to join the merlion pic yet you're still there!!!! your “i was forced to do this” face cant trick me!!!!#you couldve easily said no and yet!!!!!!!!!!!!#kudou “i will pout and complain the entire time but i'll still do what the people i love wants me to do” shinichi#also i think kaito would want to travel the world#i hope he gets to do lots of magic tours around the world#maybe as kid but most definitely as himself too!!!!!#(yes kid is also a part of him but also!!! i want his name kuroba kaito on the posters!!!! with magic tricks in his own repertoire!!!!!!#with no agenda or mission just performing magic purely for himself and the joy of it#and a seat reserved for shinichi always!!!!!#i feel like kaishin would love to travel the world even though a part of me thinks they would also be such homebodies lol#a good balance of both perhaps#during tours where shinichi goes with kaito#shinichi usually tries out all the seafood and any marine life related activities when kaito is busy preparing for the show
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thinking about how suguru’s ultimate ideal was to create a world where sorcerers like himself and satoru wouldn’t be needed at all, much less overworked. but in leaving to pursue that goal he left jujutsu society with only one active special grade sorcerer, effectively dooming satoru to spend the last of his teenage years and all of his short adulthood being overworked by the higherups. and if suguru had meant a little less to satoru, if satoru valued his opinion only half as much, it wouldn’t have been a problem; but satoru truly did see suguru as his moral compass, so he let himself be used for the benefit of others when he likely wouldn’t have cared enough to do so before he met suguru. satoru let himself be worked to death because suguru left to make a world where nobody would need to be worked to death. even if suguru never talked to yuki and didn’t come up with an extreme plan, even if he just left jujutsu society behind the way nanami did, even if he stayed in contact with satoru, it couldn’t have changed anything between them. they were doomed from the second suguru gave satoru something to really care about, because suguru was never going to stay and satoru was never going to follow.
#sunny yaps#word vomit fr ughhh. love these two#started thinking about this earlier because#i was listening to#shadowplay by joy division#and theres this one part#i could only stare in disbelief as the crowds all left#i did everything everything i wanted to#i let them use you for their own ends#to the center of the city in the night waiting for you#UGHHHGJHH#i have to make everything about them#jjk#satoru gojo#suguru geto#satosugu#jujutsu kaisen#does this even make sense#i feel like it comes across as me trying to blame sg for something#but i am not#jjk meta#i think?
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litany of the martyrs (click for better resolution!)
#at some point i wanted to make an illustration for each character but in retrospect maybe each is multiple song-coded..#drew the sketch for a quincy thing after a chat with a mutual reminded me this song existed dfsghjkl and then spent weeks rendering this#quincy cynthius martin#adamandi#i'm finally done with this! the saints especially were joys to paint and the halo a menace.... this has been the most ambitious one so far.#but it also took quite long because i only worked on it <engages with quincy> when mentally okay to deal with the themes. i'm not religious#but i do identify with the irrational(?ish) guilt + family legacy + academic achievement + disregard for self. also more complex thoughts#about love [but depsite quincent being a large part of quincy's character this piece deals with mostly the Rest of it. so another time..]#anyways! in the original sketch- the saints had heads bent towards quincy so the halo spikes pointed at him. but this worked better! halos#of the saints implying/creating one for quincy was a concept from the start though. in the show they don't touch him directly here but#differences in mediums i think- i don't have time in an image to craft a narrative so everything has to be happening. also artistic liberty#misc inspiration for this includes stained glass windows. i might have maybe misinterpreted the saint costume but i think i logic-ed it out#as the cloth part following a nun's habit w the hood. and then halo above. the material is also more transparent originally but i had. um.#too much fun painting fabric folds.. if you look closely you can see the basis of faces though behind the cloth; but only the vague shapes#because smth obscurity + inhumanness// cassian is the only one i gave a mouth though. that stems from melliot's post about the saints and#st cassian as spokesperson (<- did research teehee!) that's also how i found out which costume = which saint. speaking of which.#left to right: 'st lucy take my hand' // 'st lawrence give me strength' (presses quincy forward; but hand on shoulder connotates guidance)#/'st cassian help me smile' (quincy's mouth is btwn a grimace and a smile; tilts up at side. also no direct touch bc added insidiousness.)#//'st jude [...] i hope your causes burn' (jude's hand is in two places to show movement- nearing the flame and then snatching back; burnt)#other notes: at the midst of the flame the core is shaped like a human heart /the saints and their wax are all melting like the candle for#fun visual effect and also this way they are even less tangible <real>. perks of painting as a medium i guess. // also insp from icarus?#wax and burning imagery; looking at the halo and rays as parallel to sun that burns. too close to the sun; melting; hurting; hurtling //#candles at bottom are a nod to the frankly gorgeous set// also the entire composition kind of stems from the lyric <what use is a candle if#both ends aren't burning>; the two sides between the concepts of catholic guilt and academic perfection that spur quincy#the halo above (saints and guilt; litanyofthemartyrs) and the 'halo' below (academic papers; insp from choreo for perfect at school)#the papers were originally supposed to be more glowy. but i like the idea of it now being a reflection of how quincy's priorities shift#also of note is that <candle> in centre = quincy; w burning candle + aforementioned heart in flame -> most human; idea of love + passion#last thoughts: kneeling + hands close tgt = prayer //wax dripping onto the red As make an effect that looks like blood. because i like#hiding that within the adamandi pieces :OO continuity!! // i've run out of tags but yeah! had fun with this one! every so often i go a#little insane in making art and the final result astounds even me. ngl i'm quite proud of this one. pretty colours <3333
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