#an au which i actually liked wtf

[superbellsubways]

havent drawn this guy in forever oops

[valhallavalgrace]

How are you adjusting to the whole Norse mythology situation?

LEO: I’ve mostly been bugging some of the older einherjar, and Hunding, a little bit, to figure this place out. Do you know how cool it is that some people have been here since the industrial revolution?? There's no way that I'm the first of my dad's kids to make it here. I just don't know who to talk to about it.

((Leo's coping mechanism re: Norse mythology is just hating himself more bc of course he doesn't belong in his own afterlife. but he won't admit that to anyone bc he doesn't know who can be vulnerable with.))

prev ask

[riacte]

so hey guys i finished dungeon meshi yesterday and i'm still thinking about it

[nostalgia-tblr]

What do English people call a close? You know, the stairwell bit where all the flats are in a tenement? If you go to visit someone at their flat, what do you call the bit where you wait for them to answer their door? That communal stairs… area?

("Modern AUs don't require research" MAYBE IF YOU'RE ENGLISH THEY DON'T 😭)

[snickerdoodlles]

Big is older than Kim so now he accidentally has a little brother. Someone send this child to bed and make him eat his vegetables. He’s not concerned, he just needs Kim in top shape for bitching and murder!!

prev

I don't see that personally? Kim does have ultimate little brother energy. he is THE baby of the family. Porsche sees him and goes "oooh new brother" in 2 seconds flat while Kim sputters confusedly in the back. I have a group of college seniors and peers who adopted the shy lonely angry kid in mind for Kim always, and Tortoise and I once came up with a whole roster of old/older neighbors on Kim's floor who dote on him. he just has that vibe 🤏

but Big doesn't have a caretaker bone in his whole body. not even caretaker cartilage. he's one of the best protectors! but he doesn't read as a caretaker to me.

I do think that of all the bodyguards, Big's the only one who doesn't mind Kim duty (he sat through like two sittings of Kim grilling him on Kinn's security before he realized Kim just wants Kinn safe and hey, he wants that too!). I think he does also want Kim safe, but that's mostly rationalized as wanting Kinn's-little-brother-whom-Kinn-deeply-cares-for safe vs any specific feelings he himself holds for Kim, and it doesn't really come out in the form of Big looking out for Kim's personal or day-to-day well-being, but rather Big helping Kim scheme and snoop. and I think of all the guards, Big is the only one Kim can stand (except for maybe, maybe Arm too, only on account that Khun really likes him and he's a decent enough informant) (Porsche doesn't count as a guard, obvs, which is something Big agrees with him on though their reasonings are different). I think that shoving them together has lots of fun opportunities for them to realize they actually respect and even kinda like the other, I just like even more when they don't have the faintest clue what to do with it. talk to each other? increased interaction? admit it? fuck no.

also it's just really funny to me if these two (emotionally repressed idiots) are in their weird limbo of not being able to label their feelings on That-Guy-I-Definitely-Don't-Care-About-But-Kinda-Respect-And-At-Least-Don't-Want-Dead (a high compliment considering their lifestyle tbh, not that they mean it that way either), then someone (read: Khun) drops the bomb "awww you made a friend!" on Kim.

Kim: what the fuck?! no I didn't! hold on, I'm texting Big this bullshit right now

(Big: what the fuck you are not my friend???

Kim shoving his phone in Khun's face: SEE!!!)

[aeb-art]

i was trying to make up side characters for @8um8le's space friends and thought "every show needs a grump"

i'm not gonna finish this though, so y'all can have it now o7

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[krynutsreal]

guys hi guys I just wanted to let u know that I finally got around to organizing (quotation marks) my sky au doc (technically i just added headers and moved around information ive brainstormed) .......very exciting for me who has been wanting to do stuff w the au and literally just kept putting it off !!!!!! many thoughts.

[no1ryomafan]

We’re gonna ignore the fact it’s nearly 3 am while I type this but I’m gonna for once embrace my true cringe-I say as cringe is dead-and admit at least here since I said it on twit but not everyone follows me there that I’ve been cooking up a getter crossover fic with mega man ZX of all things. Why? Well next to mega man being what truly sparked my obsession for robots and ZX is my favorite series of the franchise there is a scary amount of similarities between the two that a crossover unironically fucking works well. Like I don’t think it was anything intentional, ZX definitely has some mecha influence like every other mega man series but it was more so (obviously) inspired off of toku if we focus on an genre in Japan. However both in a way can be boiled down to “humanity’s future is tied directly to machines” and “destiny is my path to choose” in terms of narrative themes so they legit stick together sososso well.

(also I noticed like- Arma!Kei and Go and Ashe and Grey are almost scarily fucking similar minus Ashe&Grey actually getting to know each other since that sadly doesn’t happen-in the manga they do meet but they aren’t related rip-in game but I might need to save that for a different post even though it’s not at all in the au since there’s no place for it I just I rotate it constantly)

Me and my beta reader were so insane enough that for nearly a YEAR we figured out this au because it was just “what if ryoma but in ZX” for the longest fucking time I’m not fucking exaggerating because it’s a semi trend of mine to want to throw ryoma into other series even if I’ve mostly restrained myself with this 💀 But when the fic is up I will likely be tagging it under ZXG so it’s easy to organize so yeah.

[banannabethchase]

10 and G, MoxEddie or MoxMatt

Romantics

Dialogue 10: “We could get pizza afterwards.”, Scenario prompt: Haven’t-met-in-person-but-we’re-planning-to AU

~

Matt kicks his legs as he rolls around on the bed. He overshoots it and flops onto the floor.

"Do you mind?" his roommate groans. "I'm trying to sleep over here."

"It's four in the afternoon, Adam. And I'm fine, thanks for asking." Matt pushes himself up to see Adam sitting up, hair flying around his head like a mane. "Where even were you last night?"

"Why are you on the floor?"

"I asked you first," Matt says. He looks at his phone again and giggles.

"Seriously, what's with you?" Adam says. "You look all glowy."

Matt spins around. "He texted back."

"Oh, god," Adam groans. "Not this again."

"Coming from the guy who probably got railed into oblivion last night, shush." Matt looks back at his phone.

[4:06pm]

sooooooooooooo is this you asking me if I'll ask you to go see Spiderman with you? because yes. we could get pizza afterwards if u want

"I was out with...someone." Adam immediately flares bright pink. "Don't say anything."

"Well, I'm going on a date with that guy I've been talking to," Matt says, grinning. "See?" He stands on his toes and shoves his phone in Adam's face up in his loft.

"Okay, cool," Adam says, sitting up carefully so he doesn't hit his head. "I notice it's been, like, five minutes and you still haven't responded. He probably thinks you're saying no."

"Oh, my god!" Matt sits down on the floor and texts this Mox guy back with thumbs of great speed.

[4:11pm]

i would love to!!!!!! want to go tomorrow night? i have my 8pm class tonight :(

Matt literally holds his breath as he waits for the response. Adam's staring down at him. "Distract me," Matt demands. "Who'd you sleep with last night?"

"We didn't - okay, there was, like, almost a couple handjobs involved, but -"

"Oh!" Matt says. He grins up at Adam. "Was it that cute freshman from your math class?"

Adam turns neon pink. "Maybe."

"I knew it," Matt says. "I could tell he -" He pauses, his phone buzzing. "Mox texted back!"

"What kind of name is Mox?"

"It's Mox's name, jerk," Matt says. "Now shut up. I have to read this text."

"You could read the text with me talking."

Matt sticks his tongue out at Adam.

[4:13pm]

cool :) see u then can't wait to meet u

[4:14pm]

me either!!

Adam stares at Matt. "You're still on the floor."

"I am in love," Matt retorts. He slides into his desk chair, spinning around.

"Matty, you haven't even met this guy," Adam says, sliding down the side of his loft. Matt's still surprised he's never slipped with how messy his desk is, but Adam gracefully plants his foot two inches away from his laptop then lowers himself to the floor. "How can you be in love with him?"

"I just know," Matt says. "He's gonna be the man of my dreams and we're going to get married and be adorable forever."

"You are nineteen," Adam groans. "You can't be sure of that."

"Well, maybe I'm just more of a romantic than you are, Adam," Matt says. He flops back on his bed, letting the butterflies do their thing. "Maybe you need to loosen up a little."

[thawthebeez]

i've been sooooo not in the writing mood it took me 3 attempts to get ONE paragraph down god i gotta get with it again

[astonmartinii]

the king of monza can do what he wants | charles leclerc social media au

pairing: charles leclerc x fem alonso!reader

the king of monza can win the race, have his relationship exposed and challenge his soon-to-be father-in-law to a duel, he can do what he wants.

MASTERLIST | TIP JAR

oscarpiastri

liked by olliebearman, danielricciardo and 432,095 others

tagged: lilyzneimer, yourusername, charles_leclerc

oscarpiastri: double header means we crashed on my adoptive parents' couch and forced them to cook for me (only y/n, obviously)

view all comments

user1: does he know this isn't his private account?

user2: SHUSH DON'T TELL HIM

user3: we need to enjoy this while it lasts

jackdoohan: oscar, there's still time to delete this

oscarpiastri: why would i delete this?

oscarpiastri: oh

oscarpiastri: oh no

jackdoohan: you might want to warn your kinda dad you've exposed the identity of your kinda mum as your kinda grandad is probably putting out a hit on him as we speak

fernandoalo_oficial: don't call me a grandad 👿🤬😡😠💢😤

jackdoohan: OSCAR QUICK HE'S DISCOVERED EMOJIS HE MUST BE REALLY MAD

user4: fernando, are you okay?

fernandoalo_oficial: i want that frenchies head on a stick

charles_leclerc: i am monegasque!

fernandoalo_oficial: so you do actually want to die?

yourusername: okay let's calm down old man

fernandoalo_oficial: SILENCE I WILL NOT CALM DOWN! THAT'S THE MAN?

yourusername: yes!

fernandoalo_oficial: no.

charles_leclerc: i object!

lancestroll: his eye hasn't stopped twitching since

charles_leclerc: i don't care! he might be crazy but I'M IN LOVE SO BRING IT OLD MAN

user5: wtf have i woken up to this morning

user6: the public execution of the prince of monaco

yourusername: just because he has a samurai tattoo doesn't mean he knows how to use a sword

fernandoalo_oficial: i will tear him apart with my bare hands

user7: i fear this comment section alone has undone all of his funky grandad tiktok PR

user8: he's going to make charles cry in the press conference

yourusername: oh well, charlie is hot when he cries

user9: and how do you know that...

yourusername: that's none of your business 😈

yourusername

liked by oscarpiastri, maxverstappen1 and 2,312,088 others

tagged: charles_leclerc

yourusername: italy has my heart and so do you <3

view all comments

user11: queen got exposed and immediately started flexing her unbelievably sexy bf

yourusername: why wouldn't i? he's so damn FINE

charles_leclerc: teehee (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)

user12: you might as well have told me to kill myself

fernandoalo_oficial: enjoy your weekend charles, it will be your last

charles_leclerc: and if i win? i think suspended sentence?

fernandoalo_oficial: @carlossainz55 i have a proposition for you

yourusername: why are we acting like he wouldn't do that for free

carlossainz55: excuse me?

yourusername: i'm calling you a jealous bitch xx

carlossainz55: what is your price nando?

fernandoalo_oficial: i'm not fucking paying you, i was assuming you'd do it in a jealous rage anyway

carlossainz55: ???

user13: the way carlos is being jumped from both sides unprovoked

user14: which ever alonso it is, they choose violence

oscarpiastri: so ... am i off the hook yet?

yourusername: you know we can't say no to you

fernandoalo_oficial: oscar you might actually be my favourite now, thank you for bringing this to my attention

oscarpiastri: sure i'll take it!

charles_leclerc: you can have my heart and everything else for as long as you want

yourusername: looks like you'll never get it back ;)

charles_leclerc: that's fine by me if i get to spend it with you

yourusername: i love you :P

charles_leclerc: i love you more ( > 〰 < )♡

fernandoalo_oficial

liked by jensonbutton, aussiegrit and 1,209,566 others

fernandoalo_oficial: cash prize for anyone who can actually track down this little rat - i just want to talk i swear

view all comments

user15: it's official everyone, he's gone crazy

user16: as crazy as he is at least he's bringing the DRAMA 🤩

yourusername: this isn't very peace and love of you

fernandoalo_oficial: that has never been the way in this family

fernandoalo_oficial: but let me make this clear, i mean in a destroy all of your enemies way rather than a jos verstappen way

maxverstappen1: ???

yourusername: destroying our enemies does not mean you can do your best jos verstappen impression and drive your aston martin into charles

fernandoalo_oficial: don't be stupid y/n, the aston martin is too slow, i'm going to steal his brakes

yourusername: and how will you do that boomer

fernandoalo_oficial: ferrari are stupid they probably still haven't changed the passwords or locks since i left

yourusername: @scuderiaferrari excuse me???

scuderiaferrari: ....

user17: so like this is a genuine hit?

user18: mob boss!fernando alonso you are so special to me

user19: sorry charles but it's so sexy

charles_leclerc: drop the address senor i'm not scared of you

lancestroll: he brought the samurai sword btw

yourusername: @f1 DO YOU PEOPLE HAVE ANY SECURITY MEASURES ???

f1: it made a good tiktok 👍

yourusername: you people are useless

charles_leclerc: no worries my love it's all under control

fernandoalo_oficial: i will carve you like a christmas turkey

yourusername: you go anywhere near charles with that sword we're both going romeo and juliet style

user20: what on earth is going on

user21: just smile and wave i think we're watching collective hysteria

f1

liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri and 3,562,778 others

tagged: charles_leclerc

f1: CHARLES LECLERC WINS FOR FERRARI AT MONZA

view all comments

user23: bro heard fernando was gonna steal his brakes and simply just drove so fast he didn't need them

user24: he was like 'oh you want my head on a stick? TRY AND CATCH ME'

yourusername: pretty boy is so so talented it's not fair

yourusername: who am i kidding

yourusername: STUNT ON THOSE HOES I LOVE YOU BABY

charles_leclerc: thank you baby, i simply had to drive so fast so i could give you a kiss

charles_leclerc: and also so i could tell your dad to SUCK ON THAT OLD MAN

user25: he's had too much champagne and might actually get himself killed

user26: i will throw myself in front of that sword for him

yourusername: you and me too buddy - i'll cover your drinks for this evening

fernandoalo_oficial: i still want him dead

charles_leclerc: what the fuck do you want from me? i just won? did you see that freak of an orange car? i look after your daughter like i looked after those tyres

yourusername: so romantic 🤭

fernandoalo_oficial: he just compared you to tyres? have some standards i raised you better?

yourusername: believe me, i do have standards - he's special xx

fernandoalo_oficial: i also won monza with ferrari he's not that special

user27: at least he's stopped with the samurai sword talk?

user28: he did say he still wants him dead though

maxverstappen1: @yourusername why couldn't you have dated lando? would've made this championship a lot easier

landonorris: HUH?

yourusername: please refer to my previous comment about standards

charles_leclerc: hehehehehe

landonorris: HUH???

charles_leclerc

liked by oscarpiastri, maxverstappen1 and 4,523,099 others

tagged: yourusername

charles_leclerc: grazie mille tifosi !! this is for you and all of your support. i'm glad my family and my love were here to see this win as well. fernando, bring your sword, i'll fight for your daughter's hand.

view all comments

user29: i love this family and i've known them a week

user30: fernando might have to go through me as well at this point

yourusername: i love you so much and you have deserved this and more for so so long xx

charles_leclerc: i couldn't do it without you (and our weird little grid family)

yourusername: you're my favourite person in the world and i just love to see you happy

charles_leclerc: you make me the happiest man in the world

yourusername: i love you

charles_leclerc: i love you too

user31: as cute as all this is ^^ where is this duel

user32: can someone PLEASE STREAM IT !!!!! I WILL PAY

user33: I NEED IT I NEED IT

fernandoalo_oficial: come outside

lancestroll: he spent all of the debrief sharpening the sword btw

charles_leclerc: i'm ready girlypop

fernandoalo_oficial: GIRLYPOP ???

yourusername: PEACE AND LOVE BOZO

maxverstappen1: can we get this show on the road please?

lewishamilton: charles please hurry up i've got some serious cash on this tussle

yourusername: how much we talking?

charles_leclerc: i might die and you're checking the wager?

yourusername: because i have faith in you !!!!

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, fernandoalo_oficial and 2,136,344 others

tagged: charles_leclerc

yourusername: he's alive and he's a winner! the king of monza can do what he wants

view all comments

user35: prince of monaco? king of monza? bro is collecting titles

yourusername: my husband next 🤞🏻

charles_leclerc: bet

user36: is ANYONE GOING TO TELL US WHAT HAPPENED IN THE DUEL

georgerussell63: it was extremely unprofessional and there will be an extensive powerpoint covering how this won't happen again

fernandoalo_oficial: i'll fight you next time george

user37: don't go off TOPIC

charles_leclerc: i out strategised him lol

oscarpiastri: what he means is that he surprised fernando from behind and wouldn't stop hugging him until he agreed that he wouldn't skewer him like a kebab

charles_leclerc: and it worked! now look he's on my boat giving me his blessing

user38: you're telling me charles hugged his way out of the conflict?

user39: perhaps the most babygirl he's ever been

user40: we need the pictures SHOW IT TO ME RACHEL

fernandoalo_oficial: fine, i guess he's okay. i'm not calling him the king of monza though

yourusername: i knew you'd come around

fernandoalo_oficial: i love my daughter SORRY

yourusername: don't lie to me you only calmed down and accepted it because i called in the reinforcements

user41: i'm crying she called babysitters for her dad

yourusername: jenson and mark, idk how you deal with him

jensonbutton: the stress of him and his antics keep me skinny

aussiegrit: i think we're all trauma bonded

charles_leclerc: i'll be the king of monza, if you'll be my queen

charles_leclerc: and i will continue to do what i want

yourusername: i'll be your queen anywhere you want

yourusername: and if doing what you want includes fighting my dad... let's turn it down a lil

charles_leclerc: for you, i'll do anything

fin.

note: here yall go - this was in my drafts half done from monza weekend but life got crazy

[maplesyrupsainz]

˖⁺｡˚⋆˙peas in a pod | CL16˖⁺｡˚⋆˙

pairing: charles leclerc x student!reader y/n (she/her) x alexandra saint mleux

genre: social media au, polyamory

warnings: polyamory

summary: in which alexandra brings you home with her for summer break and the next thing you know…

a/n: back on my poly bs

request!!!: i would love if you could do an alexandra x charles x reader smau where reader is also an art/art history student who attends the same school as alexandra - maybe alex brings her back to monaco for summer or winter break?

my masterlist

fc: taylor hill

instagram ->

alexandrasaintmleux posted a story

liked by charles_leclerc, iamrebeccad, and others

user1 soo cute

user2 i love that ur a student

user3 she's so pretty!!

charles_leclerc we all miss you at home

alexandrasaintmleux miss you sm more!

user4 who is sheeee

alexandrasaintmleux 📍 paris

liked by charles_leclerc, francisca.cgomes, and others

alexandrasaintmleux in between classes ❤️

view all comments

user5 omg so much y/n

user6 fan behaviour

user7 LOL

francisca.cgomes cuties!!

alexandrasaintmleux 😘

user8 omg i love their friendship actually

user9 the jumper

user10 the third slide!!!!

charles_leclerc mon amour 💋

alexandrasaintmleux je t'aime <33

user11 ugh goals

user12 i want those shoes

user13 oh to be a chic art student in paris & be bffs with alexandra

user14 literally ugh thts the dream life

yourusername posted a story

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, yoursister, and others

yoursister where the hell you going?

yourusername i told mom 😂 im going to monaco with alex <3

yoursister gosh you guys are whipped for eachother lol

yourusername 😜

user15 is that alex

user16 aww inseparable

friend1 you two are joined at the hip!

liked by yourusername

alexandrasaintmleux posted a story

liked but charles_leclerc, yourusername, and others

charles_leclerc je t'aime 💕

alexandrasaintmleux ahhh mon bébé 🥰

user17 SOOO cute

user18 aww u & charles r my favs

user19 obsessed with u two

yourusername he's too sweet!

liked by alexandrasaintmleux

yourusername 📍 monaco

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, charles_leclerc, and others

yourusername break so far! 🐰

view all comments

yoursister so gorg

yourusername 😘

user20 omg is the last pic alex & charles?

user21 it has to be!!

user22 is y/n third wheeling them 😂

user23 ooh flowers 👀

user24 the bunnies😭😭😭😭

user25 are the bunnies urs & alex's y/n

yourusername me alex & charles picked one each 🥰

user26 omg

user27 so throuple vibes!!

user28 oh be fr

alexandrasaintmleux world's fav third wheel 😝😝

charles_leclerc nah, just ours

yourusername oh stop it you two!

user29 what

user30 🐟

user31 LOL sommat fishy going on ere...

messages ->

txts between alex & charles !!!

twitter ->

messages ->

instagram ->

yourusername

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, francisca.cgomes, and others

yourusername bliss ❤️

view all comments

user36 omg so gorgeous

user37 alex 🥹🥹

user38 this is so.......

user39 🏳️‍🌈

charles_leclerc 🥰🥰

liked by yourusername

user40 🤨

alexandrasaintmleux having you in monaco is bliss!!!

yourusername 🤭 oh stop it you!!

user41 guys why do i feel like alex & charles have an ""arrangement"" with y/n......

user42 what omg

user43 no same coz wtf is all this

user44 fr & y/n third wheeling their date like hmmmm

user45 u guys are nuts 😂

yoursister get back here

yourusername 😘 not so fast

charles_leclerc we're gonna keep her for a bit longer if that's okay!

alexandrasaintmleux don't reply coz we're keeping her anyway!

yoursister i suppose i have no choice but to give my blessing

user46 LIKE???

alexandrasaintmleux

liked by yoursister, charles_leclerc, and others

alexandrasaintmleux lil update! 💋

view all comments

yoursister cuties!!

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, yourusername

user47 the second pic omg

user48 girl the FOURTH?

user49 fr y/n has like no clothes on…

user50 it's called a throuple guys😩

user51 everyone stop saying throuple so loud 🫦

charles_leclerc beauties ❤️

alexandrasaintmleux 🥹💗💗

user52 plural........

user53 throuple truthers all rise

francisca.cgomes miss you babe!

alexandrasaintmleux miss you 😽

iamrebeccad gorgeous as ever 🫶

alexandrasaintmleux mwah love youu

user54 guys do we actually think they're in a throuple or is it a joke

user55 it started off as a joke

user56 we are no longer sure

user57 could go either way

twitter ->

instagram ->

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername, alexandrasaintmleux, and others

charles_leclerc three peas in a pod 🫛

view all comments

user61 oh it's real

user62 this is a hard launch bro

user63 THE LAST PICCC

francisca.cgomes my absolute faves! simba loves y/n 💗

charles_leclerc who doesnt!

yourusername 🥹❤️

user64 bro

user65 y/n meeting the other wags now too🥹🥹🥹🥹

iamrebeccad two gorgeous gorgeous girls!!

liked by yourusername, alexandrasaintmleux

charles_leclerc …and me?

iamrebeccad yea, i guess you're there too!

user66 HAHAHAHA

user67 she's like us

carlossainz55 the ferrari garage is flooded with beautiful women 💋

liked by yourusername, alexandrasaintmleux, iamrebeccad

user68 too cute omg

yourusername omg i love you guys

alexandrasaintmleux I LOVE YOU!

charles_leclerc my beauties!!

yourusername art school changed my life 🥹🥹

charles_leclerc ours too, baby <3

THE END ❤️

[nostalgia-tblr]

in writing news i am likely to miss the sifki week deadline as the week has already started, and i am also behind on updating the adultery AU so i have managed to create for myself a paralysis of "i should write this thing... no i should write this other thing... but i need to write this thing first... or do i?" where I am writing nothing because I don't know which i should be doing.

[leclercsainzz]

Can I request a reader x wolff one please? where reader and non f1 male were the ultimate couple, so it came as a shock when they broke up. With many people being sad about their split, since they seemed perfect for each other. However recent rumors have surfaced that maybe she might be seeing toto, which causes quite a stir among fans, who are now speculating about the potential new relationship?

NEW ROMANTICS

PARINGS: toto wolff x fem!reader

TYPE: social media au

yourusername

liked by jaredpadalecki, lewishamilton and 567,738 others

yourusername: @vanityfair oscar date night

view 4,748 comments

genpadalecki: 😍 stunning as always!

↳ yourusername: i love youuu 😘

user: can jensen fight?!??

user: MOTHER OMG

user: where’s jen?

user: stunning 😍

user: she does NOT age, i swear 😩

misha: 😃

↳ user: castiel energy frr

user: did jensen go with her??!?

user: mom where’s dad?!???

user: she’s soooo mother, omgg 😍

user: @jensenackles can you fight, bro?

user: lewis, what are you doing here?!?? 👀

user: the definition of MOTHER

user: has anyone noticed jensen hasn’t liked/comment?

↳ user: what are you insinuating??!? 🙄

↳ user: haven’t seen them together for quite a while, actually

↳ user: obviously they won’t be out in public 24/7

user: kindly step on me 😩

user: did her and jensen break up or something?!? 😭😭

user: anyone else noticed the mercedes boys in the likes?

user: 😍😍 gorgeous!

user: jensen’s one lucky ass mf 😩

user: waiting for jensen’s comment and like

user: ATE and left NO CRUMBS

sofiavergara: 😍 wow

user: mother is mothering 😍

user: why are ppl saying her and dad are broken up?!!?

user: 😍😍😍😍 goddess

jensenackles

liked by jaredpadalecki, misha and 788,825 others

jensenackles: a little bts of yesterday’s photo shoot

view 5,736 comments

user: the man that you are, oml 😮‍💨

user: the fact that yn’s getting this everyday 😭😭

user: they’re still together right?!!??

jaredpadecki: 😘

user: so fine

user: apparently he might be single again sooooo 😏

user: he’s fine and he knows it

user: WHAT A MAN 😍😍

↳ user: indeed 😩

user: are yn and jensen still together?!??!??

↳ user: of course, why wouldn’t they be?!?

↳ user: there’s been rumors going on about them breaking up

↳ user: they better not be true 😭 wtf

user: why are people saying jensen and yn broke up??!?

user: father of my kids (im kidding) (im not)

user: aged like fine wineeeee 😮‍💨

↳ user: he gets sexier each year 😍

user: SEXIEST MAN ALIVE

user: @yourusername is so luckyyy

↳ user: supposedly, they broke up 🤷🏻‍♀️

↳ user: sAy SIKE RN

user: how can i get his attention? 😩

user: another day another slay

user: finest man ever 🥵

user: that’s my dean winchester

user: i need to know if mom and dad are still together or not

↳ user: girl, frrr 😭😭 it’s been weeks

user: where’s yn??!?? she hasn’t liked nor commented 🤨

user: sirrrrrr 😍

user: so sexyyyy of him

yourusername

liked by lewishamilton, evalongoria and 600,839 others

yourusername: life lately

view 5,746 comments

user: YN A MERCEDES FAN?!!??!???

| liked by yourusername

user: is thAt toto wolff?!??

user: gorgeous 😍

user: missing dad hours 😓

↳ user: we’re ALL going through it right now:’(

user: mercedes?! lewis liking all her post?!? tell me u all see it?

↳ user: we all see it, i assure you 👀

genpadalecki: gorgg 😍

↳ yourusername: ❤️

mercedesamgf1: thanks for coming, pretty lady 😘

↳ user: ADMIN?!!??? WHAT IS THIS?!!?

↳ user: lewis is definitely behind all this, i just know it

user: WHERE’S JENSEN???? 😭😭😭

user: lewis is great and all but jensen?!!?!?

user: can we talk about toto’s back? 😩

↳ user: she really got the best angle

user: who got you smiling like that? 🤨

user: the most beautiful woman ever, i swear

ruthie_connell: 😍😍😍 beautiful!

user: get back with jensen, please 🙏🏼

user: please tell me you’re dining with dad in the 5th slide

user: your beauty is unreal 😩

user: wait— who’s lewis?!!?

↳ user: formula one driver

↳ user: 8x world champion

↳ user: 7* but okay 🙄

user: mother 😍

user: yn being a mercedes fan is everything to me

user: mad i didn’t see her at the race 😭😭

yourusername

liked by realmarksheppard, pierregasly and 679,738 others

yourusername: 💗

tagged: @genpadalecki

view 4,846 comments

user: tHAT DOES NOT LOOK LIKE LEWIS?

user: who is that?!??

jaredpadalecki: @genpadalecki 😍

↳ yourusername: our wife’s gorgeous, isn’t she, moose?

↳ user: nOt moose 😭

user: that ain’t lewis?!??

user: i’m just going to pretend that’s jensen for my sake

user: missing jensen:((((

user: her friendship with gen is everything

user: gen and yn are the female version of sam and dean

feliciadays: beautiful ladies 😍

user: and everyone thought it was that hamilton guy LMAO

user: still not over her and jensen 😭😭 they were perfect

user: MOM, WE WANT DAD BACK 🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲

user: anyone else think that looks like toto wolff??

↳ user: tHat’s what i Said!

misha: thanks for the invite btw 🙂

lewishamilton: 👀

↳ user: sIR, wHAT DO YOU KNOW?!??!?

↳ user: mind sharing with us??

carmenmmundt: 😍😍😍 gorggg

user: IS SHE DATING TOTO?!!?!????

user: lewis AND george liked? 👀

↳ user: even gasly’s nosy ass liked

↳ user: that’s why his forehead so big 😭 he knows it allllll

user: her side profile, omg 😍😍

user: he definitely screams toto wolff

user: idk who this wolff guy is but i want jensen back

user: her and jensen were supposed to be endgame 😭😭

user: ngl but her and toto would definitely make a cute couple

user: i love how everyone just assumes she’s with toto now

yourusername

liked by georgerussell63, sofiavergara and 687,863 others

yourusername: ft a small photo dump

view 6,527 comments

user: THAT BACK LOOKS SO FAMILIAR

user: tHat’s TOTO OMG

user: toto?!?!?? 😮

genpadalecki: my loveeee 😍

↳ yourusername: 😘 love yaaa, girlfriend

user: oooh to be yn

user: ynjensen is really over 😞😞

user: toto, that’s a nice back you’ve got;)

user: toto’s one lucky mf

user: I MISS JENSEN 😭😭😭

user: yn, babe, this ain’t you, get back with dad

user: that’s a hot back

user: lordddddddd 😍

user: TOTO?!!??

user: mother 😍

user: IS THAT TOTO, OMG?!??

↳ user: yessss

lewishamilton: 👀

user: ariana (lewis) what are you doing here?

georgerussell63: nice back there, mate

comment has been deleted

user: we saw thAt comment george

user: toto is so fine omg 😩

user: my man is so fine

user: her side profile is everything

user: oNE CHANCE, YN, PLEASE 🙏🏼

user: toto’s soo lucky huh? 😭😭

user: did anyone else see george’s comment?!?!?

↳ user: what comment???

user: MOM MOM MOM MOM

user: you cannot tell me that isn’t toto

user: his back bro 🥵

user: what about jensen???? 😭😭😭

yourusername

liked by lewishamilton, pierregasly and 678,629 others

yourusername: life lately <33

view 6,510 comments

user: “life lately” and post THE TOTO WOLFF?!! 😮

user: bitcH OMG

user: yn pulls the hottest men ever 😩

↳ user: nah frr — first jensen now toto??

user: idk if i want to be yn or be with her

user: can i be your sugar baby?

mercedesamgf1: finest couple ever! 😮‍💨

↳ user: admin— you’re so real for this omg

↳ user: admin knows what’s up

user: can toto fight?

↳ user: can’t fight for a championship that’s for sure

mercedesamgf1: the boss says you’re gorgeous

↳ user: GIVE THIS PERSON A RAISE FOR THEIR HARD WORK

genpadalecki: wifeee 😍

↳ yourusername: love yaaaaa 🫦

user: nooo, i miss jensen 😭😭

user: i KNEW IT I KNEW IT I KNEW IT

user: okay but how did toto bag her??? like come on

user: gorgeous ladyyy 😍

ruthie_connell: 😍😍😍

user: nOt pierre being in the likes

↳ user: loves the gossip lmao

jensenackles: @misha @jaredpadalecki told you

↳ user: DAD?!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!!

↳ user: told them what?!!?

↳ yourusername: 😭 leave me alone, i love my chocolate

↳ jaredpadalecki: it’s always the chocolate

↳ genpadecki: chocolate is addicting okay

user: JENSEN COMMENTED?!???

↳ user: glad to know they ended on good terms 😩

user: yn, you’re sooo gorgeous

user: the woman that you are, omggg 😍

user: mother frrr

user: they make such a hot couple

user: yntoto 😮‍💨

user: i just need to know you and jensen are still friends

↳ yourusername: always <3

lewishamilton: gorgeous - toto wolff

lewishamilton: i don’t have instagram - toto wolff

↳ yourusername: text me, love 😘

↳ user: please this is so cute

user: nOt the sign off by toto himself 😭😭

christianhorner: 🫡

[feyburner]

This is part of a longer thing I may post on ao3 at some point but here’s some silly little Jaytim texting AU. I use this format as a writing warmup.

EDIT: This has been posted on AO3.

[Unknown] »

Hey. This is Jason. 

I have a favor to ask. You can say no.

« tim

uh

1. i’m aware of how favors work  

2. what is it?

« tim

?

« tim

hey are you like. good

J »

Yeah fine 

Sry. Rethinking this maybe

« tim

what, do you need a kidney or something?

i can’t give you a kidney.

i don’t have any organs to spare.

J »

What ? 

« tim

what’s the favor?

J »

I wouldn’t ask if it wasnt important

I’d ask Roy but hes in star city 

or Kori but shes off world

I tried dickhead but hes in haven. Cant get away tonight

« tim

yeah jason i get it lol

J »

So Im currently in the cargo hold of a private yacht

« tim

what >?

J »

We’re caught in the storm thats hitting the city its a whole thing. 

« tim

are you in the cargo hold of your own volition or did someone put you there

J »

So I dont think I can get back t

No its on purpose

« tim

hang on. you’re in gotham bay right now? in a boat?  

jason this storm is really bad.

it’s already sunk a houseboat and a fishing boat at the marina

J »

I dont think I can get back totown toni

Christ you type fast 

Shut up for a sec. Clam down

Clam*

*Calm fuck me

Thought I was gnna be back tonight but bc of storm its not looking great.

Can you feed my sourdough starter 

« tim

what

J »

4511 overhill apt 6D 

Key under the neighbors mat. 6H

« tim

hey to clarify. “its not looking great” ← what does that mean

J »

Starter is on counter. in glass jar 

Should just need one feeindg. Maybe 2. depending 

« tim

on???

J »

On wwhen I get back?

« tim

so you do plan on coming back

J »

Yeah timothy I’m in a boat not the heart of Mount Doom

« tim

yeah? vaders not there? so that means everything’s fine? 

J »

Did you

jst say Vader

As in Darth

« tim

??? 

J »

Oh my god

« tim

jason are you in peril or what.

J »

No im not in “peril” lol.

Did you see the thing I said about my sourddough starter

It needs to be fed

« tim

wtf is a sourdough starter

nvm i googled it

J »

Its a live bacteria colony you use to m 

Oh ok

Yeah so it just needs 50g lukewarm water + 50g flour

Theres a scale next to the jar

Stir until it looks like hummus

Put lid back on

The end

« tim

the internet says if you put it in the fridge it doesn’t need daily feedings

J »

Sure. But that would mess up my bread schedule

« tim

your bread schedule 

J »

Man are gyou gonna fuckin feed Breadie Mercury or should I find someone else

« tim

im already en route. 

J »

Oh

Ok

Thank you.

Wtf dont text and motorbike  

« tim

how about you dont text and Sinking Boat

J »

Hey its not like I’m gonna cause a boat crash

« tim

i was stopped at a red light 😐

anwyay i’m at your place.

1. why do you not have a security system. when you said key under the neighbor’s mat i thought you were joking. 

2. how warm is lukewarm

J »

1. I’m the security system

« tim

just rolled my eyes so hard it actually physically hurt

J »

God youre annoying

2. ? Its lukewarm

« tim

ohhhhh thanks! that’s so helpful :) here i am trying not to murder your incredibly important bacteria colony that i just drove across town for but no thats great jason very descriptive thanks :) 

J »

Like warm but not too wram, nothing you’d want to take a bath in

Can you fucking

I TYPE SLOW.

« tim

ok.

[Image Attached]

he is fed

J »

Thanks man.

Sincerely.

« tim

so hows the cargo hold going

still intact i assume? 

J »

Mostly ya

« tim

pardon? 

J »

Slight leakage. Nothing major

« tim

oh? are you a boatologist now? 

i dont think you’re qualified to judge that?

J »

Moving right past “boatologist” out of the goodness of my heart.

Chill lol. If it was rly bad thered probably be some sort of alar

Hm.

« tim

did an alarm just start going off

J »

Dont worry about it

« tim

im not. 

did it though

also which yacht? im in the marinas scheduling dtabase

blue miracle, serendipity, carp-e diem? which one

« tim

jason?

« tim

if this is a joke it’s not funny

oh cool you’re not on comms either. great.

hey if youre dead again and i just fed your stupid starter for nothing im gonna be soooo mad just fyi

« tim

ugh.

*

J »

Hey

Thanks again for the

I’m not gonna say “save” bc I was doinf just fine on my own.

But thanks for the backup.

Lmk when youre home

Nope sorry lol you dont have to do that.

Night.

« tim

home

J »

Also I just saw your messaages from

Ah. 👍

From earlier. 

« tim

you mean from when you said “huh, this boat seems to be filling with water” and then disappeared? those messages? 

J »

Those were not my exact words.

« tim

right. your exact words contained somehow even less information 

J »

Shut up

I just wanted to 

You know. Youre the only one who jokes about it

The only one in the family I mean

your family, I mean

The bats.

« tim

? 

the only one who jokes about what

J »

Me being dead

« tim

oh. 

ok. well

its not like. actually funny to me. i was just annoyed. sorry i guess

J »

No thats not 

Tim. Shut up.

I dont mind. I like that one of you does. 

Its better than people talking around it. Like its this big shameful thing I did.

One of many

If I mention it in front of dickhead he does the face

the :~{ face

« tim

wow its uncanny

uh. for the record. 

i don’t think that’s the reason people talk around it

if im correct in thinking that by “people” you mean “one specific person whose name rhymes with Rat Can” 

 

J »

Yeah well

I just

Christ never mind. Im sorry. You are not the person to be sayign this to.

Im gonna shut the fuck up I think. 

Goodnight.

« tim

oh what, you can’t talk to me about being dead bc of that one time you tried to kill me? 

and failed btw :/ 

J »

Tim

Not to be so unchill

But you know how me being dead isnt actaully funny to you

« tim

…got it. sorry

J »

No. don’t apologize to me

Ever

I’m serious 

« tim

like for anything? 

what if i killed breadie mercury 

J »

You didnt. He is thriving

« tim

he is?

wait. really?

you can tell?

J »

[Image Attached]

Hes doubled in size since you fed him.

« tim

whoa

J »

Yup. Thanks again for thattoo.

*that too

Its stupid but hes kinda my son.

« tim

wouldn’t he technically be like, 10 billion sons

J »

He is my 10 billion sons.

« tim

lolol

wow. why am i so pleased hes thriving lol 

J »

Right

« tim

jeez

i was so worried about the water temp

google said lukewarm is 98-105 so i did 98 to be safe

J »

You used a thermometer? 

« tim

your instructions were vague!

i didnt want to kill your bacteria colony!

J »

Thanks Tim.

« tim

? you already said that lol

i gotta pass out btw

glad you didnt die: the sequel in a yacht

that would have been so cringe

night jason

J »

Night

*

J »

You up?

« tim

obviously

why

J »

Could use your eyes on something.

[Image Attached]

« tim

morse code but the dots and dashes are reversed and its spelling backwards in russian, ASTITP AYALEB AVD RTSIRP → PRISTR DVA BELAYA PTITSA → PIER TWO WHITE BIRD

J »

Bc it looks like morse but its not, its kind of scrambl 

Ok jesus christ . 

30 seconds? Seriously? Fuck me

Can I hire you? Jesus lol

« tim

that depends. do you pay more than batman?

J »

The fuck? Does he pay you guys now?

« tim

no.

J »

Then yes. I do pay more than batman.

« tim

how much more

J »

One coffee per codebreak? 

« tim

:\

J »

Two coffees per codebreak

Two and a loaf of sourdough

« tim

sourdough from breadie mercury?

J »

Ya

« tim

done

J »

Damn. I feel like you should have higher standards

« tim

i mean i was already gonna do it for free

now i have successfully negotiated coffee & sustenance 

im on a roll. nothing but Ws 

J »

Ws?

« tim

its young people slang you wouldn’t get it ❤️

J »

I am barely 3 years older htan you.

It could be argued, considering certain events, that we’re basically the same age.

« tim

and yet you text like an old, old man

J »

I do not

Would you rather I texted like “idk brb lmao roflcopter”

« tim

ROFLCOPTER?

oh my god. ohhhhhh jason. oh my god

that is absolutely not what the kids are saying these days. oh my god

J »

Ok you know what. At least I know Mount Doom isnt a Star Wars thing

« tim

? 

oh, is it star trek? 

J »

I’m 99% sure youre antagonizing me on purpose

But have you seriously not read or watched Lord of the Rings

« tim

no i have not.

J »

Hm.

« tim

what

J »

Nothing.

« tim

……….what

*

« tim

did you NARC on me

to BRUCE

about LORD OF THE RINGS?????

J »

I don’t know what you’re talking about.

« tim

WHY DO I NOW HAVE 3 SEPARATE SUNDAY AFTERNOON “HOUSE MEETINGS” BLOCKED OFF IN MY CALENDAR, JASON? 

WHY ARE THEY EACH 4 HOURS LONG?

WHY ARE THEY LABELED “CULTURAL EDUCATION (MANDATORY)”? 

J »

I can’t pretend to know what goes on in B’s mind.

That said, I have reason to believe he and Alfred take lotr pretty seriously.

« tim

its a TWELVE HOUR MOVIE

about GOBLINS

J »

I’m not gonna respond to that bc I know youre just lashing out.

« tim

if youve sentenced me to 12 hours of a movie i hate i’m gonna hack everything you own. 

im gonna mass text the entire cape wearers community the footage of that time condiment king kicked your ass so bad he felt guilty and offered to personally help you out of the mustard pool 

J »

What the fuck

How do you fuckig know about ?????? that???????? 

Not that ithahpened 

What hefuckk ??

« tim

ooooooooo you better hope i love these goblins!

J »

Why are you?? evil??

« tim

you should have killed me when you had the chance!!

sorry.

J »

Its ok. That one was pretty funny tbh.

Oh hm shouldnt have laughed just then. Bad timing on my part

Brb

« tim

uh

« tim

ok…….. getting reports of a “disturbance” at pier two…….. 

« tim

sorry were you texting me *mid-standoff* with the russian mafia

« tim

ugh.

*

« tim

you know tracking your location would be so much easier if i didn’t have to hack into your comm sys every time

luckily your encryption is garbage but still. its 2 minutes of my life i wont get back.

J »

Not sure I recall giving you permission to track my location?

« tim

oh i’m sorry. next time i will simply leave you to go down with a texas oil magnate’s incredibly tacky yacht, or get swiss cheesified by mobsters 

J »

Hey I wrapped up the russians myself 

« tim

yeah? 

J »

…

Yeah….

« tim

so you thought the 12-minute universal signal jam was the act of a benevolent god? 

J »

:-|

« tim

im just saying it would be significantly more efficient if you agreed to a tracker

just one little tracker. you wouldn’t even notice it’s there.

think of all the time and energy you’d save me

J »

I feel the need to point out that you don’t have to repeatedly hack my comms system.

« tim

i mean it’s that or monitor sightings on the gocitizen app

i have an algo that texts relevant pings to me, which is super helpful for when i want an inbox full of random people talking about how hot you are. less helpful for literally every other circumstance 

J »

Uh

What

« tim

how hot *red hood is. to clarify

in their opinion

the people’s opinion

J »

?

« tim

the people of gotham city

J »

The people of Gotham city do not think Red Hood is hot lol

« tim

wait 

i cant tell if you’re being serious

J »

Uh? Yeah Im being serious? Lol tf

Why would they think hes hot 

They dont think Batman is hot 

« tim

o…kay…

huh.

how to… hmm

J »

Like nightwing sure

And the girls. Bc of objectification of women

« tim

oh wow

J »

Red Robin. If i had to guess

But when people see Hood its definitely not… that kind of response lol

« tim

what kind of response, exactly

J »

You know like saying “Hey Hood youre hot” 

« tim

oh, wow. 

okay. ummm

hmm. one sec.

J »

?

« tim

check your email 

J »

Ok…? 

J »

Oh my fucking god.

« tim

yeah

J »

Oh my god?

« tim

yeah

J »

This document is fucking 45 pages long?

« tim

its everything from the past 30 days yeah

J »

The past

Whaht the fuck

Ok some of these people definitely got hit by Poison Ivy.

This is . Tim wtf. I havent even heard of some of this stuff. 

« tim

oof are you on page 14

J »

Im on page 3???

« tim

oh my god

J »

What the fuck

Please please tell me its not like this for Batman too

Tim

« tim

its not like this for batman :)

J »

Ok. Jesus. I would genuinely have to move cities.

« tim

its worse :)

J »

Oh what the fuck

Oh my fucking god page 14.

You get this shit TEXTED to you?????

Ohm ygod. You read this?????

« tim

i mean

no

i glance at it

for security purposes.

i dont like, read it read it

anyway did you seriously not know? haha

J »

No??? Again its not like people tell me

« tim

yeah but

like

theres a certain level of objectivity involved, here

yknow

sorry im trying to find a non awkward way to be like “have you looked in a mirror lately” 

« tim

sorry

that was in fact awkward!

nvm

just let me know if you’d be ok with the tracker. its fine if not

i was mostly joking about the hacking

J (From Work) »

No you weren’t.

« tim

no i wasnt

i dont mind though. its like a brain teaser

anyway im going dark for patrol, later

*

J (From Work) »

[Screenshot Attached]

[Screenshot Attached]

[Screenshot Attached]

[Screenshot Attached]

[Screenshot Attached]

Question. why is the average Gotham citizen a raging horndog 

« tim

oh my god

you know i can tell you searched “red robin hot” right

J (From Work) »

Figured it was only fair

[Screenshot Attached]

This persons got some mad zoom lens skills

I’d think it was you, if it wasnt, yknow, you

« tim

wow. that is certainly a photo of my ass

…a stellar photo of my ass. wow. 

do you have a direct link? i gotta send this to steph

J (From Work) »

goctz.app/user/3824973/post/29348230df3

Haha

I kinda thought you and blondie broke up

back on again?

« tim

no lol we are very much just friends

she has a thing going with someone who shall remain nameless but suffice to say it’s Going

anyway we just send each other gocitizen vigilante ass shots 

its a whole genre

they’re like trading cards

J (From Work) »

Guess everyone’s got a hobby?

« tim

the only rule is no nightwing

J (From Work) »

Do I want to know why

« tim

he accounts for a frankly overwhelming percentage of vigilante ass shots

so its too easy

you’d THINK we’d have a no-batman rule, because ew, but due to the cape and his sixth sense for cameras pointed at him, a qualifying shot is actually extremely rare. 

← only guy who ever managed to take quality photos of batman 

anyway, we put it to a vote. i lost.

J (From Work) »

A vote between you and Steph? 

You lost a 50/50 vote?

« tim

i dont wanna talk about it.

J (From Work) »

Right. 

So what I’m getting from this is you have Red Hood ass shots in your phone.

« tim

no

J (From Work) »

No?

« tim

well

J (From Work) »

Yeah?

« tim

we don’t like, save them

that would be weird

we just notify each other. professionally, as colleagues 

and keep an ongoing points tally

thats all

so i do not currently have photos of your ass in my phone. thank you

J (From Work) »

How many points is my ass worth

« tim

i hate everything about this conversation

J (From Work) »

Its 100% your own fault, answer the question

« tim

if you must know. 

points are awarded based on a series of objective scoring criteria.

J (From Work) »

Uh huh. Like what

« tim

technical excellence

composition. lighting and color balance. 

dynamism 

J (From Work) »

Dynamism…

« tim

creativity

umm

emotional impact

and 

subject matter

J (From Work) »

I see.

« tim

ok i know it sounds bad

J (From Work) »

It sounds fucking hysterical Im near tears 

« tim

but if you think abou

oh

okay, well, great

J (From Work) »

I’ll let you know if I stumble on any more. 

Or is that cheating

« tim

its totally cheating

please do

J (From Work) »

You got it red. 👍

« tim

:)