#an action we can all take
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The 24 hour Economic Blackout
As our first initial act, we turn it off.
For one day we show them who really holds the power.
WHEN:
Friday February 28th from
12:00 AM to 11:59 PM
WHAT NOT TO DO:
Do not make any purchases
Do not shop online, or in-store
No Amazon, No Walmart, No Best Buy
Nowhere!
Do not spend money on:
Fast Food
Gas
Major Retailers
Do not use Credit or Debit Cards for non essential spending
WHAT YOU CAN DO:
Only buy essentials of absolutely necessary
(Food, Medicine, Emergency Supplies)
If you must spend, ONLY support small, local businesses.
SPREAD THE MESSAGE
Talk about it, post about it, and document your actions that day!
WHY THIS MATTERS!
~ Corporations and banks only care about their bottom line.
~ If we disrupt the economy for just ONE day, it sends a powerful message.
~ If they don't listen (they wont) we make the next blackout longer (We will)
This is our first action.
This is how we make history.
SPREAD THE WORD!
#PSA#economic blackout#February 28#power of the purse#an action we can all take#stand up to them#don't spend money on that day
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Out of sight, out of - wait.
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#granny wen#a-yuan#It's always fascinating how colours translate from the page to the screen.#It would probably surprise a lot of people to see what some of these comics actually look like in physical form.#My lighter colours takes about 3-4 washes before it shows up on scan which means it tends to ripple the page.#And my yellows and oranges are drastically different colours when scanned compared to the ink colour.#There's about 20 or so comics where everyone's hair is purple - because it scanned in the exact same colour as my light grey.#Wait my book is right here in front of me so I can...yeah...Comics 57-77 were indeed purple.#This is all to say - is it not fascinating how what we see is often not the full truth of what the subject truly is?#Is it not fascinating to open another episode that reminds us that despite everyone's claims they could totally spot the evil YLLZ-#-The man walks around among them for months as no more than a man haggling for deals like the rest.#It's almost as if he's just a person. It's almost as if none of us - no matter what we do are really anything more than just a person.#Your good acts will be overtaken by how other's interpret you in negative light.#Just as easily are people willing to forgive crueler actions if they hold you in high esteem.#But what's real? Is the page I hold the real version of this comic? Is it the one you look at?#Is the man known as Wuxian the most himself when he is alone or on the battlefield?#Perhaps he is and has always been a scared orphan boy lost in the market.#I think there is no good answer to any of these questions.#But I do know that panic rising in WWX as he frantically looks for A-yuan was for more than one boy.#To be human is to have layers around a delicate center. We only really grow around our wounds from childhood.#In other words; Donkey from Shrek would also probably call Wei Wuxian an onion. I'll see myself out now.
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I think depictions of Anya being cruel to Curly or drawing out his suffering are artful and chilling but completely miss the point of the story and her character.
I'm not saying she doesn't deserve to have that "I told you so" moment with him but not in something callous or cold. Even if that is how it happened, she'd immediately feel guilty cause at that point she's not tormenting her tormenter or even the person truly at fault. She's doing something cathartic, similar to how Jimmy likely hits Curly to release rage he can't against the rest of the crew. She'd see herself as no different when she'd come back from the moment and see Curly cowering at her. She wants someone to take responsibility but how does being cruel to the defenseless help? Why would she want the power Jimmy has over her over Curly?
The idea of her extending someone else's pain is just so against the struggles she already faces and how she can't even bring herself to cause someone pain even to help them. Her very desire is to release herself from her own suffering and I doubt she'd even fine some sort of guilty release in being cruel to another.
#anya is not a character i see taking agency or indulging in cathartic behaviors#not knowingly like i see her as a character trapped in her head and maybe in the scenario she's cruel to Curly she is envisioning Jimmy#in his place but its not a story about justice or those deserving of punishment and those not like its the opposite of people projecting#their issues on the wrong people and saying things to the wrong people and doing things they shouldn't but anya uniquely falls out of it as#she is subjected to a lot of it but it is also not something she wants to subject another person to like you are doing what Jimmy does and#placing ur rage into another persons and viewing their actions through your eyes like she'd more likely yell at him than do harm or#cause him more pain like at least make it in character#but also she clearly doesn't want to see jimmy or curly in the same light and doesnt because she still repeatedly goes to Curly for comfort#and protection and god there's like concepts that need to be applied to characters individually and then the story as a whole#we can not view the game through only one themed lens less we forget to inspect the compounding factor of Anya is so much more than girl#that needs to be allowed to go off but a woman that simply wants right to be done by her and no more harm like she doesn't want to be aroun#the suffering like idk but some of yall would just benefit from like understanding that people are inherently grey with the capabilities of#black n white thinking or actions#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#anya mouthwashing#i like her the most but then again i am defensive of all women in media and hate when people change the way the character would take agency#for themselves like yes I want her to tweak out but she just wouldn't and I like seeing realistic depictions of a woman suffering the way#she is like shes not the type at the end of the movie to have a one liner but feel a shallow freedom cause she needs to realistically heal#idk but its just like there is an obbsession forming with making her character her pain and not how she handles and navigates the issue
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Something something every time Charlie isn’t fighting to be the center of attention, he is always looking around to others to gauge their reactions and silently observing them all something something he is searching for connection, to fit in and be loved but he doesn’t know how to ask for love so instead he gains their attention by acting out in ways he knows they’ll notice and tries to pretend their attention and love are the same thing
#Charlie knows how to push people’s buttons just right to make them pay attention to him because he’s always observing them first; like he’s#not as reckless as we all think he is; he’s fairly smart and also#like Charlie seems so emotionally intelligent in the way he can gauge most peoples reactions from observing them and I think that’s why he#liked keating because keating didn’t act the way he expected and so it was amusing and enthralling to see someone he couldn’t clock#keating would do weird things and Charlie would watch in amusement and he would try to push Keatings buttons in the ways that would make#other teachers upset but they all just slid off Keatings back without him getting upset so Charlie had to try harder but keating seemed to#praise him so Charlie actually started getting what he was craving and so he tried to do something big for keating only to be confused when#keating didn’t like what he did; but then Keating still gave that unconditional support even tho Charlie didn’t get the right action and I#think that’s at the root of their relationship like you can’t have the keating and Charlie dynamic without Charlie being smart#charlie dalton#dps#dead poets society#dps fandom#dead poets fandom#like it’s so interesting to watch him in scenes not about him cause it feels like he is such a more dynamic and complex character when you#do cause we all say he doesn’t know how to be quiet but so often he is silently in the background watch and observing like the walking#scene is a good example and idk I just feel like Charlie is silent and observing more than we think he is we just don’t realize cause he is#so loud in his other moments we take those as him#and ignore him otherwise which feels like exactly what he wants because he wants to connect with people but he wants it to be on his terms#because he spent so long manipulating people’s perception of him that to be vulnerable or not in control makes him scared and he can have#this front he puts on criticized and made fun of because it’s not the real him but if the real him was ever rejected I don’t know if he#could handle it and I think he knows that; idk I just think we need to give Charlie more credit than we are giving him cause hes so complex
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realizing that people who equate cynicism with intellectual rigor are often just being lazy and pathetic has been so helpful tbh
#like the endless amount of cynicism i see on here particularly amongst american leftists just very much reads to me#as a combination of moral ocd and identity politics / optics#where if you’re sad/angry enough it excuses you from participating in the real world#instead of like. funneling a real desire to see positive change into channels of action#anyways. aoc and rashida talib the only bitches out here i respect#i am never going to be a person who responds to like. paragraphs about how electoral politics are evil or america is evil like yeah. true.#but i live here. people i love live here. strangers i love live here. so now what do i do that is Real outside of the whining chamber#optimism = stupid / fatalism = intellect is like. LOLOLOL#we all have to chose to believe that we can create a world that is livable#which is not to say i am#at all aligned with the dem#establishment or the liberal agenda but like. i’m not taking myself out of the game bc i believe i can Do Something and it’s my duty to do
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Ok so this is going to be my attempt to put all of my thoughts about Silco and Vander and their relationship and how they might achieve reconciliation into one coherent post because I cannot! stop! thinking about them!
As we see in s2e7, reconciliation between them is definitely possible. However, I think it definitely wasn't easy, and it wasn't motivated by a single event like Silco finding Vander's letter or Vi dying. I think a million little things needed to perfectly align for them to find back to one another. As others have already said, and I agree with this, I think the "happy" timeline is a statistical anomaly for them.
So what was needed for them to find back to each other? And like, disclaimer that this is obviously only my own interpretation of events.
First of all, I think one of the prerequisites for reconciliation is that Silco doesn't start working with Singed and doesn't get into Shimmer, which is supported by his eye having healed normally in the alternate timeline.
I also think that Vander's letter could only ever be a starting point for their reconciliation, something that would get them in the same room to talk again. After that, I think they'd still need a long, long time to get back to how things were.
Vi's death imo has absolutely nothing to do with whether they reconcile or not, because in the alternate timeline she dies during what would be Act 1. Silco is already past the point of no retunr here, he doesn't give a shit about Vi or the other kids, he's deep into his Shimmer business. He's literally planning to kill all the kids in episode 3. He would not give a fuck if Vi died in that explosion. If Silco and Vander are to reconcile, it needs to happen pretty soon after the betrayal.
But I think the most important aspects for their reconciliation are violence and ideology.
Obviously the actual betrayal is horrifically violent and traumatizing. Vander actively chose to drown Silco which is just like, such a brutal way to die. He does this because he puts the blame for the bridge fight escalating on Silco. This is unjustified, and the show wants us to know that Vander was in the wrong here. Vander himself admits in s1e3 that he has regretted what he did to Silco since it happened. In general episode 3 in my opinion very clearly communicates that Vander overreacted and that what Siclo did (throwing the first molotov) does not justify Vander's reaction (violent murder).
However! Vander also clearly still thinks Silco is dangerous and despite regretting how he reacted still puts some form of blame on Silco.
In the apology letter, he says the blood is on both their hands. The letter in general is shit considering the weight of what Vander did, and what it shows is that even though Vander feels bad about what he did, he does still put the blame for the bridge fight on Silco.
In act 1, Vander also says there are worse things than enforcers in the Undercity while looking at his brace that covers the scar Silco gave him while escaping. This is, presumably, before he knows Siloc has been funding Shimmer development and getting into human experimentation. He thinks Silco is worse than enforcers based on whatever happened between them in past. With s2, this is explicitly Silco's escalation on the bridge.
So obviously despite the time that has passed and the fact that Vander can admit what he did was unjustified, he does still believe Silco is dangerous based on their differing ideology. Benzo, too, obviously still holds a grudge against Silco for what happened.
So really the crux is that even though Vander feels sorry, he does not change his stance on non-violence being the right way forward for the people of Zaun, and thus he can never truly forgive Silco for what he did on the bridge - he still believes that Silco is responsible and that his own way is the right way.
I think as long as Vander keeps his ideological stance, reconciliation between them isn't possible. From both sides, because Vander thinks Silco's ideals are dangerous, and from Silco's side because he thinks Vander is a coward and a sellout.
Then let's look at Silco's side of things a little bit.
I think there's two aspects to his forgiveness/reconciliation with Vander: the violence and the ideology.
Canon pretty much tells us that Silco is willing and able to forgive the violence Vander inflicted on him. We see this not only in the alternate timeline, where they're obviously close again, but I think s1e3 tells us the same. Silco kidnaps Vander, but still offers him the chance to join him in the fight against Piltover again. I don't want to talk here about Silco's methods at this point in time, but he's obviously willing to put the murder attempt behind them IF Vander is willing to switch to his side again. He even says that his hatred for Vander passed with time. I think this implies that, somehow, eventually, with time, in a nicer timeline Silco could really forgive Vander for trying to kill him.
However, and I think this is the much bigger issue for them, there's still the matter of ideology. Vander betraying their shared goals, turning towards a pacifist, more passive approach to revolution and ultimately striking a deal with Grayson is what really drives the wedge between them.
This is what Silco despises Vander for: For turning his back on violence. Silco encourages Vander's violent tendencies, he wants him to become the person he used to be again, wants him to embrace that part of himself again. I think this supports the assumption that Silco would forgive the violence inflicted against him much easier than Vander abandoning their shared dream. Until the end, he wants Vander to embrace that violence again.
And a Vander who is committed to non-violence is a Vander who stands in the way of Silco's goal of a free Zaun. So as long as Vander stays firm on his ideological stance, Silco is always eventually going to get rid of him. There is no way for them to find back to one another if they remain on opposite sides of the struggle they used to fight together.
This is, I think, the crux of my interpretation of them:
Reconciliation doesn't only depend on Silco coming back to Vander and forgiving him for the violence Vander inflicted upon him. It also depends on Vander coming back to Silco, internalizing that the bridge figth was not Silco's fault, and being willing to compromise his non-violent ideology and take action again for their shared dream.
It's about the two of them coming back to each other.
#arcane#silco#vander#zaundads#(tagging this as ship because i ship them in all their violent fucked up glory and i wrote this post with a somewhat romantic angle in mind#vanco#i hope this is at least somewhat coherent and i managed to convey my thoughts on this#long story short i think the question is not whether silco could forgive vander (he could)#but whether the two of them could realign their ideological standpoints#really whether vander could admit he was wrong about not only trying to drown silco but also about changing his political stance#before silco goes off the deep end for good and reconciliation becomes impossible#also with the alternate timeline episode showing us a peaceful zaun and canon showing us how ultimately useless vanders inaction was#i think we can infer that a big part of that au is vander and silco learning to work together and taking political action#which imo can never be entirely non-ciolent if it's supposed to be successful#anyway! that's all thanks for reading please don't come for me if you disagree
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I went to an Ilan Pappé talk yesterdays - I really recommend his books if you've not checked them out already. He's arguably one of the worlds leading experts on Zionism and the "Israel"-Palestine conflict, so obviously everything he said was great, but what I want to highlight:
Someone asked him if he thought the protests and petitions and calling you reps and shit would work, and he said no, it never will. It's still important to do that but the powerful will never surrender their power to the powerless just because they ask for it. Asking the UK and the US to cut ties with their imperial outpost in the Middle East is like asking an animal to gnaw off it's own limb - it won't do it unless its only other choice is dying completely.
So who does have the power to put a stop to this, we asked. The working class of the imperial core. That's us, and we are the most powerful people in the world right now, because this war machine can't function without us. Movements like this can only be built from the ground up, so stop looking to the government and start looking to your community. We need to make it more unprofitable to support Israel than it is to cut ties with it.
This is a call to action. The people HAVE the power, and we have to use it. Yes, that's you. Contact your trade union, your workplace, your school, your church, your university. Your friends, family, any connections you have. As many people on board as possible, with one goal: shut it down. Take direct action now.
#were seeing this all over the world so i know we know all this but it bears repeating#stop lamenting on how you wish you could do more. you can#the power is with you#we have to stop begging the government and take it into our own hands#idk we could do so much more#your voice matters it really reallt does#also don't let yourself get distracted#i keep seeing that thing w the watermelon filter on tiktok that apparently raises money#and like sure do that if u have a second#but it isn't really helping palestine because none of that money is getting through#its just another thing keeping you distracted#idk man#ill make a post more abt direct action and shit and what you can do in your community#and what to push for in your school uni ect#anyway yeah#palestine#gaza#israel#free palestine#ilan pappe#mine
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The musical episode.
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#jin guangyao#nie mingjue#Remember jin guangyao: If you do any treachery you will face the wrath of five horses.#When are the horses going to come into play? You'll see.#s2.ep8 had beautiful music... I listened to it on loop while drawing!#Good music to chill out to before you fly into a rage.#This episode really cements how JGY's mind works - It is a matter of long-term outcomes at the sake of nearly everything else.#Morals do not matter to him if the outcome is more favourable.#and at the center of it all - he has learned that the only person he can truly trust is himself.#In turn - the only person his actions benefit are himself.#He will do anything and everything it takes to reach a position of power - not just for the power. But because it means safety.#Because it was something he was denied and the idea of not having control in his life again is unforgivable.#'Happiness' isn't a goal. We are looking at someone still stuck at the bottom of Maslow's hierarchy of needs.#Everything and everyone is a piece in a game. Bonds and friendships are assets. People are dispensable.#He wants to climb for the sake of climbing. He wants praise and recognition because he feels it is deserved. It's all so hollow.#We could go deeper into his psyche on this.#But these are also tags under a comic in which 'evil penis music' is the punchline.
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the fact is, if varric lives (and that's an if bc maybe solas does kill him lmao idk how much to trust that minimap reveal) it IS weird that you can't customise a hawke or account for the decision because it would be a little weird if a man who has lived through a wannabe god + blight dragon attacking warden fortress has nothing to say about ghilan'nain and her blight dragon attacking a warden fortress, especially if he potentially lost his best friend (Hawke). It's not outlandish for people to be a little disappointed to not get some customisation there because the choices are not equal to varric. the loss of hawke is obviously a bigger impact on him than whichever warden is there. given varric's personality, it's not outlandish to expect him to talk about it with Rook either especially considering weisshaupt is a thing that happens in the game. if he dies beforehand it doesn't matter, but if he's going to be around? yeah you'd think he'd be talking about it here.
speaking of weisshaupt, A PLACE YOU GET TO GO, a hero of ferelden who made the ultimate sacrifice IS FUCKING INTERRED THERE. But it's just "whining" to expect a nod (esp one that you can customise so it's your hero of ferelden) i guess.
regardless of whether morrigan has mythal or not, who she is as a person does change based on whether she was romanced and whether she had a child. it is natural that this matters and people aren't stupid to be tentatively concerned that nothing of her history is "required" but she's apparently this important vip character who will have more involvement in the game than you expect. like you are allowed to ask: okay what does this mean, what will she be like, will she be the same character i've loved across multiple games?
people are allowed to be upset or concerned that a game series that historically took your choices and your decisions into account has watered that down to 3 choices when certain choices that WOULD impact characters that appear in THIS game aren't. (and to be clear being upset does not mean harassing the devs, don't do that).
#tbd#bioware critical#listen i am happy to take the L if i am wrong but like i find it very exhausting that you're not even allowed to be a little negative lmao#it's okay that the impact you as a player made on this world matters fuck all when characters who#who felt that impact and would be shaped by the outcome of your decisions are returning lmao#i don't think anyone expects every fucking decision to matter but like people are rightfully bothered some decisions lmao#and these one liners that john epler is so dismissive of do actually matter to people bc they still add flavour to their experience#as players who have been playing these games for decades lmao#it's not hard to see why people aren't the biggest fans of this lmao#you can make a mage divine and no one in northern thedas would care? really?#andrastianism is still the main religion in these places lmaooo#the divine is still the head of that religion in the countries we go to in datv except for tevinter that has the black divine.#like the divine being a mage would probably warrant a fucking note about it at least#the actions of the divine would reflect in how the chantries function like ok cass is the only option closest to the status quo#leliana or vivienne? yeah you'd think decades later they'd have had an impact in how the chantries function?#and you'd at least get to read a note about it lol#like come on#datv spoilers#da4 spoilers#veilguard spoilers#da spoilers
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while we’re at it, if you don’t change your behavior and take the necessary steps to prevent the spread of covid-19, you will lose your disabled friends and family one way or the other. if they don’t die, they’ll become too disabled to go out or see loved ones anymore, including you. and if they manage to stay safe, they’ll see you, not doing anything to help them maintain that safety. they’ll see you unwilling to protect them because it’s inconvenient. they’ll see you treating other people like them as disposable, as unimportant, as unworthy of safety, community, joy, and life; as though they are cannon fodder for your “new normal”. and they will realize you see them as disposable too. they will realize you aren’t a safe person for them, that you can’t be trusted, that they are not as important to you as your personal convenience. they will realize that their life matters less to you than going to that concert or eating out in a restaurant or going to a party. they will look at you, ignoring the suffering around you, unwilling to put a piece of cloth over your face for the sake of normalcy, and they will know that they don’t matter to you, regardless of how much you claim to care, because your actions speak louder than your words. and it will ruin your relationship with them. they will grieve who they once thought you to be, and even if they stay, they will never look at you the same. your relationship will forever be tarnished or you will lose them altogether all because you couldn’t be bothered to be uncomfortable for even a second. because you would rather stick your head in the sand and pretend everything is back to normal while they drown in front of you because it is easier for you.
your disabled loved ones see your lack of action and care, and it tells them they don’t matter. please show them they do. if you want the chronically ill and disabled people in your life to stick around, to see you as someone they can rely on, someone who sees them as valuable, wear that fucking mask.
#if you claim to value community or class solidarity or social justice you need to put that mask on. right now.#anti-capitalist? anti-racist? queer? pro-worker? pro-palestine? put. the. mask. on.#we cannot organize or protect marginalized people if we are all too sick to take action#and don’t forget that the disabled community is the only marginalized group that ANYone can become part of at ANY point in their life#and when you become one of us and everyone leaves you behind too will you expect us to be there for you now that it affects you too?#disability#disability justice#chronic illness#covid 19#covid conscious#ked rambles
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My unpopular ruikasa take is that tsukasa (if given encouragement and a good enough pep talk) would say something. His confidence in himself and the strength of his bond with rui would hard carry in this situation even if he would prefer to not say anything. “I shouldn’t run from my feelings and if I’m rejected it’ll be fine.” but rui would saw off his own leg if it let him escape a situation where he had to even come close to confessing to tsukasa. Rui “deep seated fears about being too much & losing his friends over it” “zero desire to risk shaking up the group dynamic and having it turn negative” “it’s selfish for me to want to keep my loved ones by my side” kamishiro would absolutely go “he will hate me forever im not saying shit I will never speak of this to anyone ever” unless he was 100% confident the feelings were reciprocated. & even then it’s a 50-50.
#also. yk. if rui was under the impression tsukasa didn’t like men i think he would resolve to take his feelings to his grave.#there’s plausible deniability in flirting with your boy bestie (‘it’s for the bit’). not so much in stating it plainly.#& he hates to state things plainly.#mine#tsukasa#rui#I don’t even think rui would mention it to emu or nene or anyone else. maybe the virtual singers. but he has a Thing abt talking abt#his feelings where saying it makes it real. if he just keeps it all in his head he can ignore it.#& I also think there would be a lot of ‘what if we break up and it ruins the group’ fears whereas#tsukasa ‘the future can only be positive’ would not be thinking about that.#Rui likes to plan for every possible contingency & the possible fallout. tsukasa is very step 1. action. step 2. ??? step 3. succeed.
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Maybe it's a bad idea to give a lich access to multiattack.
#we speak#plotting out the bg3/taz:b crossover#realizing that we may have accidentally manifested a build with four actions per turn including both Counterspell and Riposte in reactions#unfortunately for literally everyone else in this setting we like lae'zel and think she should be allowed to kill#she can cast three fireballs and power word kill on the same turn and then gut someone with a riposte. as a treat#if we pulled this encounter in an actual game of dnd our players would not appreciate it#because it would sound like “so her saving throw is... (rolls) a 7. but shes rerolled it to (rolls) a 13. but that doesn't pass either”#“so she's going to choose to succeed on the roll. half damage. she resists that also. anyways its her turn now. she casts fireball"#“(dice clattering) 22 damage each. and now she- no im not finished yet. she follows that up with another fireball”#“and two more fireballs. okay roll the damage from that- so you're holy smiting her on her turn? yeah she takes... 15 damage”#“and shes retalitating with a legendary action. actually. yeah all of you take 6d6 necrotic damage. on the spot yeah.”#and the action surge of course. who could forget action surge.#a lich should not have fighter levels in general probably but making this build is really putting some emphasis on that
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I could go on and on and spiral about a LOT of things relating to NSBU:
The NATURE of the nsbu movie and what THAT could entail and what THAT could mean for the characters in this movie
The way at how everyone in the main cast AND barsimmion follow the themes of the lack of change and stalemate in life
#nsbu spoilers#d20 nsbu#never stop blowing up#im so glad they finally ran into barsimmion bc it essentially means we can see what id like to call. the metaplot#which is essentially. okay so you have nsbu the movie plot. the shadow falcons the santo patron the kingskins group etc.#the metaplot is very simply: everything relating to the lake elsinore gang#anyway cal and i devolved into a half an hour talk about what IS nsbu the movie.#and the idea that potential of. almost self awareness to this fact. bc to these guys all of THIS? is resl to them and theyre living it#it changes in a dime#and they keep going. actions and consequences bay bee#so to have this ever flowing ebb and flow of a lifestyle juxtaposed with these 6 normies who REFUSE to do anything more with their life.#or rather might be too scared to consider what could happen if they take the first step or cant emotionally do it. whatever the reason.#putting these guys in situations where THEY DO have to act. where they do have to change bc if they dont they WILL LITERALLY DIE#its fun its really fun to think about
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What a difference in the two interviews - Duchovny's in 1997 and Anderson's in 1998.
Duchovny was super arrogant and pretentious, thinking he was the King of Cocada Preta, trying to pass himself off as an intellectual, bored with fame. Winona Ryder never came out to David because she was much more famous at the time.. Thankfully, in the years that followed, he had to tone it down. Less Duchovny, much less…
Anderson, on the other hand, looked like a working mother, working non-stop to support her daughter, zero glamor, a bit depressed, like a middle-aged woman broken by life.
And in none of the interviews did the geniuses who interviewed them talk about Mulder and Scully, who were the soul of the show.
I'm slowly working on a progress-through-Season-8-based-on-the-burnt-out-interviews post, so this was timely. :DD
To be fair, David was suffering. Both of them were. The X-Files was simply a job to DD and GA; and they coped with its insane hours and insane stresses differently. For Gillian, she internally imploded: eating disorders, panic attacks, anxiety so bad she wouldn't wish it on her worst enemy. She was afraid to put a foot wrong because she'd gotten pregnant so early on and could have threatened the longevity of the show; but she kept putting a foot wrong due to a shoot-from-the-hip personality. Then she was a divorced co-parent trying to do everything herself. David, meanwhile, didn't have that stress; but instead of marrying quick to escape the unbearable loneliness (like Gillian did), he tried to escape by getting outward attention... or through porn, joking in Playboy that his favorite pornstar had gotten him through some very, very lonely days. He also outsourced constantly, making connections with other entertainers and etc. to try to establish himself in Hollywood away from the show. Part of that persona-- that he had everything together and was living the dream-- was part and parcel of selling himself to the business for, in turn, more work.
Secondly, DD WAS arrogant. It wasn't until AA that he learned gratitude, per his own words. Until that time, he'd overachieved into such heights of success that he, naturally, developed an ego. But that wasn't enough-- it never is-- and he kept devising other ways to get attention. Per his old interviews, he described being 'shocking' or 'funny' or etc. as a way to keep others' eyes (and attention) on himself. He always feared they'd lose interest in him and walk away, otherwise (still does.)
That mindset, he's stated here and there, was a result of habits he'd formed in his childhood-- the middle child caught in a turbulent divorce: father suddenly gone, mother heartbroken, and older brother and younger sister taking sides. He had to become intermediary for his siblings and shoulder-to-lean-on for his mother. He became his mother's pride and joy: a shy kid who thought he wasn't a looker when he was younger, who transferred to a better school on a scholarship, who was "captain of the basketball team and the baseball team and a straight-A student, and I was in my last year of high school, and I'd applied to four schools–Harvard, Yale, Princeton and Brown–and I got into all of them." Who was, in short, an over-achiever; and became arrogant because he achieved everything through his own efforts. But he was also a kid who fainted in senior year, breaking his front teeth, because the stress was too much.
And he was also a man who spent long hours overworked on a show he wasn't particularly passionate about. One who spent long, isolated hours alone (in the bathtub) in Vancouver when not working. And one who always had to be "on" when he was out with his friends or spotted by people on the street. Further, no one wanted (wants) to hear the rich and successful complain about the hardships of their success. So, he turned on the charm for attention, instead; and resented having to "sell himself" for people to care about his work. And his performance, on and off screen, earned him fifteen years of public backpatting and"Fox Mulder"ing everywhere he went.
He didn't deal with the stress perfectly, and created his own problems that had to be worked through later on. But Gillian did, as well (per her own words); and they've both owned up to their mistakes and have, seemingly, moved on from the past.
Lastly, there are other interviews where his truer self comes through: those are sadder, pre-marriage; or more stable and happy, post-marriage. Gillian had happy interviews, too; but her life was much more accelerated than his (marriage, pregnancy, divorce on close heels), and thus sounded more burnt out than he was.
I don't like to pit or compare faults because I'm sure they both handled global fame and nonstop work better than a lot of people would have (David was rock-bottom depressed and Gillian was afraid she'd quite literally go insane; but they made it.) And there are always interviews where he looks like a cherub and she a hag, or he an arrogant scumbag and she a hard-done-by saint. Neither were either.
About the Winona Ryder speculation:
Even in interviews from the early days, DD kept personal details close to the chest, not referring to romantic partners as "my girlfriend" unless his significant other had an established public persona (or an upcoming project.) The person he spoke the most about was Tea-- and that was after their marriage, and only during interviews to promote their next tv series or movie. Tea was a talker, and she didn't mind when he talked about her; so, she rubbed off on David for a good chunk of their relationship-- even after the rehab stint-- until their divorce. (Now, she's taken a vow of silence and enforces it strictly with Tim Daly, as stated by both.)
I'm not up-to-date on Winona, but I'm sure the relationship wasn't serious enough for either to really acknowledge it. She looked happy in their picture together; and I don't think she's the type to deny a relationship because it might not be advantageous to her "brand." But what do I know? XDD
Those are my thoughts, anyway~ :DDD
#asks#anon#thanks for droppin in¬#he DOES sound arrogant at times-- because he was arrogant#however: I've dived down so many rabbit holes; and found you will always find an ugly side to any person#I'm more interested in a person's growth or change#and we can see he has grown because of his actions towards GA#championing her rights to equal pay in the Revival#(though I wouldn't have judged him if he sat that out; just as I wouldn't judge her if the shoe were on the other foot)#and stating he won't do the files without her (though he IS interested in the series now that he's gotten distance-- again-- from it)#he gave her her due on the show; he gave her her credit; he praised her work-- in short: he showed gratitude for their friendship#Gillian has moments of carelessness that border on thoughtlessness#and family struggles and conflicts that she took accountability for#both were fallible and acted out in different ways (privately v. publicly)#we're all fallible. we're human#but are we all responsible? do we take accountability? do we change? do we even want to?
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i think its really obvious with my chosen & dark obsession at this point but i NEED to see them being friendly & domestic and more gentle with each other in canon at least as a flashback
#animator vs animation#all we got were hold on ill count#fighting together obviously#cho offering alliance. them both having a moment of expressing anger on noogai after it#cho sharing power with dark. high five number one when they were destroying the pc#cho taking dark by hand when escaping the pc#highfive number two in the portal tunnel#dark being happy seeing chosen in his computer lab and when he was showing his virus' properties#continuing to hold chosens hand when the latter tried to stop him and placing it closer between them both to question him#(mental about this a bit)#dark not immediately attacking chosen in the showdowns shack just observing his actions#and dark being ONLY defensive when chosen attacked him and not attacking him until he falls of the cliff and sees chosens lack of care#sorry im being insane#this is my blog as you can see i knocked over many chairs because i get so tilted at chosen & dark duo#alan becker#ava tdl#ava tco
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Oh they're trying so hard to paint him as crazy
#only cRAzY 🤪 people have problems with the system in place#like the way they're trying to frame his outburst at the courthouse as something only a mentally unwell person would do#it's so gross#i have no idea if Luigi Mangione has a history of mental illness and frankly it's none of my business#but like the media doesn't know either but they're acting like “oh these are clearly the actions of a madman”#first of all we don't even know if he's the shooter the cops get it wrong all the time#but assuming he is i feel like this retoric is also super ableist and takes away mentally ill people's agency#like we saw the same thing with aaron bushnell where people I'm#were focusing on his mental health and not on the fact that he felt so guilty in his involvement in the Palestinian genocide#due to being a soldier that he felt like that was an appropriate response#but no the focus was on how clearly mentally ill he was#as a mentally ill person if I ever kill an oil executive I don't want people blaming my mental illness and not my political values#(a joke for any fbi agents reading I'm not going to kill an oil executive)#but like mentally ill people can have agency in their choices to#not that we have any evidence that Luigi Mangione was mentally ill#not that it's our business one way or another#luigi mangione#~uhc shooting
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