#his feelings where saying it makes it real. if he just keeps it all in his head he can ignore it.

[karanseraph]

Allegedly, when my dad was young, my paternal grandmother told him "all men have a dark side." I think she meant well. She was born in the early 20th century, she came over frome Ireland on boat as a child. She had a stepfather who was from another immigrant community. Families were large. There was a lot of poverty and alcohol. They were Catholic, so they also took "original sin" as a concept seriously.

I think this did my dad harm. He actually is a person who struggles with empathy. Now, it's apparent he's neurodivergent from multiple traits he has and that this probably runs in the family, but no one we knew was diagnosed back then. He views criticism as personal attacks. It's difficult for him to see difference between people (like his difference) as positive of a challenge to accept and accommodate and instead thinks (in his darkest moments) that he's broken. Or that I also am someone who needs to be fixed.

But, somehow, I'm sure from conversations most of my siblings including my brothers voted blue and genuinely are able to care about others and will try to help.

And, to clarify, my dad has done volunteer work a d actually helped some people a lot. He is in no way evil. He's human. He is a product of his time. He was indoctrinated, arguably, by nuns, and Jesuits, and the Knights of Columbus, by bullies, and every bit of 1950's US government propaganda about scary different people and the importance of conforming and being "American". He says he didn't know that he was poor as a child because everyone was like that around him. He had a moment in the late 80s where he was arguably upper middle class. But he's also one of those older people now who don't really have wealth in the oldest sense but have pension/retirement tied up in stocks market scrap and keep mortgaging their house when they need cash.

Anyway, this is long.

But what I'm trying to say is people are flawed and human and make mistakes, but they aren't born or made evil or good. I think it's more harmful to say to kids that they have darkness or sin inside them from the start than to focus on choices going forward and the possibility that when one does make a mistake they can also make amends.

So, we should try to tell kids that.

Model good behavior and choices for kids as much as we can. Communicate that humans of all ages can make mistakes. Get rid of the concept of authoritarianism and infallibility in any individual or organization. Embrace differences. Talk about our feelings when we feel hurt by another's choices or actions so we can understand or compromise.

Just do our best and be excellent to each other.

And, specifically, for those boys some are worried about - I know lack of funds can impede this - but give them lots of room to play, give them books about all different people and experiences, take them on trips to see how real people do their work, let them engage with all the dramatic play props and costumes and clothes and dolls. Let them have building toys and action figures they choose. Let them use telescopes and microscopes to shift their perspective. Let them draw and paint and write. Let them compete and measure, without focusing on the win itself.

And let all kids do those things (but above posts were about boys).

And if there's a financial struggle to provide all this, try libraries or a device that can stream old episodes of Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood, or Reading Rainbow, or Sesame Street, etc.

Because, going back to my dad, he wasn't really able to model the most typical social-emotional behaviours or interactions for me, but I could see Optimus Prime or Fred Rogers interact with others.

And my brothers turned out pretty OK possibly because our dad was able to provide many books but also because he decided with my mom early on that girls could play with cars and boys could play with dolls.

And how/why he decided that when he was such a product of past generations and watches a certain news channel three or four times a day now I can't explain. But he did.

So, we know, I think, how to help kids. I worked in early childcare education for a time myself. People know how to help kids. But...there's also a struggle for any service to be profitable which means the teacher-student ratios can get stretched and that teachers can get stuck with so many assessments and standardized testing requirements that they aren't just spending time with the kids.

But we know.

And, unfortunately, there are some in the world who have differing goals. Right? Like do you want healthy men who can work together with diverse groups of people in cooperating to better the world? Or do you want obedient workers? Soldiers? Slaves?

Men themselves are not the problem. Boys aren't a problem.

It's young people growing up with divisivness and poverty and war and demand of conformity and obedience, etc.

So, probably the best we can do foe young men is to try to understand that they aren't evil by nature. Probably Patriarchy hurt them. But because of that, they don't want to admit it to themselves, because that would be weakness.

We need to keep showing them that there are places for men (again, all people need attention, but above posts were about boys and men) in the society we want.

We can say it to men we know. We can say that we really liked when they did math homework with us, or played Lego with us, or played us music we liked, or organized a tabletop game, or built us a bookcase, or cooked chicken the way we like, or taught us how to draw our eyeliner, or even expressed a desire to defend us against another man. (These are just some examples from my life, yours are likely different.)

It would be nice if we didn't also have those negative influences in the world, but we do and we can't stop them overnight or by ourselves.

So, we do our best to model and encourage the behaviours we want and to protect institutions that help like our public libraries, and to ask for policies that will (actually) improve schools.

I couldn't have said it better myself.

[bitterkarella]

Midnight Pals: Dark Days Coming

King: hey guys sorry i'm late King: i just could not get up this morning King: feels like I've been sleeping for days King: what did i miss? King: how did the election go? Lovecraft: not too bad King: King: oh no King: oh no oh no oh no

Lovecraft: don't worry steve it won't be so bad Lovecraft: I've heard assurances from the new regime that they only want the trade unionists King: King: King:

Lovecraft: i mean really steve Lovecraft: how bad could it be? [meanwhile] Donald Trump: we're gonna have the biggliest boot stamping on a human face forever Trump: we love the boot stamping on the human face forever, don't we folks? Trump: more and more people are saying they love the boot

Lovecraft: you're overreacting steve Lovecraft: what's trump even going to do? King: well i'm glad you asked King: [unrolls comically long scroll] Lovecraft: oh is this going to be a song

King: well for starters King: decimate reproductive rights King: LGBTQ rights King: labor rights King: civil rights King: accelerate climate change Lovecraft: [sweats] this is making me feel bad steve Lovecraft: i can't wait for trump to outlaw you telling me this stuff!

King: use the military to brutalize americans King: abandon Ukraine King: and as for gaza George Romero: in all honesty steve Romero: that probably won't change much King: oh look! an optimist!

Lovecraft: ok but Lovecraft: has he actually SAID he's going to do any of that? King: yes Lovecraft: oh he was probably just lying Lovecraft: he lies a lot Poe: he does lie a lot

Lovecraft: i think you're overreacting, he's probably not gonna do all the stuff he says he's gonna do King: so you don't believe him? Lovecraft: nope! King: king: then what's his appeal? Lovecraft: well he's just so honest

Lovecraft: a real straight shooter Lovecraft: tells it like it is Lovecraft: says what he means King: King:

King: howard please tell me you didn't vote for trump did you? Lovecraft: [sweats] steve! please! Lovecraft: i'm only a loveable archie bunker style racist Lovecraft: i'm still 100% yang gang King: King: King: i picked a bad day to quit cocaine

King: i really need some cocaine King: edgar you know where i can get some cocaine don't you Poe: steve stay strong Poe: you don't need cocaine King: just one bump King: to get me through the next four years King: i mean few days King: no i mean four years

King: how about a beer? i was an alcoholic too you know King: maybe i'll take that up again King: this is good drinking weather Poe: steve no Poe: dean help me hold him back King: don't try to stop me! Poe: no steve! you've got so much to live for! King: yeah? like what? Poe: well Poe: you've got a loving family King: Joe is pretty great Koontz: and owen! King: King: yeah and owen is alright too i guess

King: yeah he's pretty good King: what the heck, i can say it King: i love owen too! Koontz: and there's naomi too King: whoa wait a second, i have THREE kids?? King: this just keeps getting better!

King: thanks guys i do feel a little better Poe: good, hold onto that Poe: cuz it's going to be a long four years Lovecraft: only four years? i thought we weren't gonna have to vote anymore! Poe: Poe: good drinking weather, huh?

Joyce Carol Oates: huh, i really don't see why the electorate would hate trans people unless they were persuaded by hate speech and fearmongering JK Rowling: well well well look at the fancccy pantsss rich author Rowling: with her out of touch fancccy ideasss about a pluralissstic sssociety! Rowling: with her fancccy german automobile! Oates: this car was made in Guatemala

Rowling: you're clearly too rich to underssstand the feelingsss of the common man Rowling: unlike me, a true daughter of the proletariat Rowling: i know all about the material needsss of the underclassss Rowling: anyway i'm going to insulate my Scottish castle with big bags of money

[kisakis-boyfriend]

Scaramouche and Kinich (separately) refusing to wear a sexy Halloween costume so you don’t let them cum until they put it on 🤫🎃

Pairings: Scaramouche, Kinich x male reader (separately)

Warnings: Male!reader, switch/top!reader, sub/bottom!characters, teasing, denial, edging, implied crossdressing, maid outfit + blowjob (Kinich), daddy kink + power struggle (Scara), small dick Scara

“No. Not happening.” he spat. His expression remained stern and his conviction steadfast.

This was not going to dissuade you, however. You were determined to see your sweet boyfriend in the sexy costume you (oh so lovingly) picked out (just for him).

“Why not? Where's your Halloween spirit?!” if looks could kill, then you would be shot dead where you stand as your partner glares through your very being. Guess you'll have to play dirty if you want this to happen…

Placing your hands on the bed—caging Scaramouche in—you lean in for another kiss. He's reluctant to accept, afraid you may have some trick up your sleeve. Still, he allows you to slip your tongue past his tender lips, and he's so quick to melt into the kiss it's almost pitiful.

Your knee presses between his legs, putting pressure on his little cock, and Scaramouche instantly humps your thigh. His body reacts in the cutest ways; arching his back off of the bed, twitching his hips as he grinds his clothed dick on your leg, fidgeting with the hem of your shirt the longer this goes on.

In need of air, you pull away. “Why do you always taste so damn good? You're addicting, you know that?” Scara lets out a single proud laugh, soaking up your praise like a sponge.

“I wanna make you feel good, babe. Want to–” Scara hums as your lips brush against his throat, leaving wet kisses in their wake. “–make you see stars.”

Scaramouche chuckles, hanging onto every word that falls from your deceptive lips. He bucks into your touch when you cup a hand over his cock, rubbing the rough fabric of his pants against the sensitive gland. “Won't you let me? My one and only?”

All the anemo user can think about is your touch and honeyed words—completely ignoring the warning signals from his brain as you drown them in sweet poison. Whatever, what's important is having his hands on me and his dick where I want it.

With a sly smile, your darling spreads his legs, inviting you to pamper him like you promised.

You slide your hand into his shorts eagerly, pleasuring him exactly how he likes it — doing all of the moves that drive him wild. Within minutes, Scara's cock is engorged and weeping with precum. His thighs tense and tremble, all while you keep him on the cusp of an orgasm without actually giving it to him.

His sharp voice cuts through the air as he demands; “That's enough! I know you're just–” the moan that escapes as you focus in on his tip catches Scaramouche off guard. “shit… you're j-just teasing me! I thought you said you wanted to make me feel good?”

“And this doesn't feel good?” you retort, sending a smartass look right back at him.

A groan rumbles through his small chest. “It does, but you know what you're doing, y/n. Get to the real stuff — either put that mouth to good use, or stick it in already.”

Ouch. If you didn't have a master plan in motion, you might've done just that, just to shut him up. But you're not giving him what he needs until you get what you want.

“Hmm… no~” his eye twitches at that. You've stopped moving your hand completely, simply holding his little cock while you smirk down at him. When he attempts to move his hips himself, and thrust into your hand, you hold his hips down, darkening your expression as a warning.

“I could allow you to cum… but you have to do something for me. Are you feeling agreeable tonight, my love?”

Scaramouche scoffs when you say that affectionate term with such disrespect. A part of him knows what you're going to say next — and he ushers you to go on.

“I picked out a little somethin' somethin' for you yesterday. If you wear it for me, I'll give you everything you want for the rest of the night~”

He fucking hates how easily you tempt him into going along with your ridiculous schemes… but he can't ignore his raging hard-on and your relentless edging either. He knows damn well that, if he doesn't agree, you will edge his brain out through his cock. You will prevent him from cumming—and the only thing on his mind will become you, and only you.

The tension remains for a moment — Scaramouche swallows thickly, then growls. “Fine. Lemme see what you bought for me.”

With an excited squeal you dash over to the closet, rummaging around until you find the item in question. You grasp the clothing tightly and return to Scaramouche's side, holding it out for him to take. He examines it for a minute, unfolding the cloth until he can tell what it is–

His lavender eyes blow wide open, and he scoffs “Are you insane? Do you actually expect me to put this on?”

“No. But if you want to cum…” There is no string of curses strong enough to convey your lover's frustration with you right now. Putting this outfit on would be humiliating, embarrassing, and destroy whatever integrity the puppet has left.

Scaramouche stares at the costume, fidgeting with it between his fingers. His head is hung low as a thousand thoughts swim through his brain. It's just for a little bit. You'll put it on, try to ignore it, and let him fuck you. He said he would do whatever you say, so as long as there are no tricks to this, you're the real winner here, right?

Fuck… it's so– so lewd. Do humans really find this kind of thing attractive? Besides, it looks like it's meant for a girl… Agh, but I'm already hard and if I refuse, he's just going to torture me all night. Just… just put it on. Once it's on I hold all of the power and he'll have to obey me. He promised.

“Don't stare while I undress… pervert.”

Trying to contain the absolutely diabolical grin on your face is useless. And you can't tear your gaze away as Scaramouche removes his remaining clothing. You do at least try to keep your eyes moving, but it's so hard when he slips his shorts down and his perfectly round butt is right there, facing you! His entire body is just a few feet away—with no barriers to get in your way. His skin is smooth—practically flawless—except for his back; which is littered with circular scars from a past he technically never experienced. Yet, when he regained the memories of that past, the markings etched themselves back into his being. Thinking back to the cause of those scars, you find your thoughts drifting some place (and some time) far, far away…

“You just couldn't help yourself, huh? Hellooo? Teyvat to y/n—wake up.”

You blink rapidly, shaking your head to get those lingering thoughts out. “Uh y-yeah. Mm, you look even better than I thought you would, love. The panties were a nice addition, don't you think?” your confident attitude returns as you take in the sight of Scaramouche in the skimpy get up.

“Shut it… I can't believe I'm doing this…” the puppet whines, though his dick still stands at full attention while he complains.

His slim waist tempts you, and you can't stop yourself from grabbing it and pulling him closer. Scaramouche glares up at you, but he finds himself leaning in as your body heat seeps into his person. The tender moment is ruined when you lift his body and toss him onto the bed in one quick motion.

“Oof! Tch, in a hurry now, are we?”

“Maybe a little bit~” Perhaps it's the lack of clothing that's causing him to feel extra vulnerable, but Scaramouche finds himself squirming under your piercing gaze quickly. Your eyes burn right through him — eyeing him as if he's nothing but a piece of meat for you to tear into and devour. He doesn't entirely notice how his thighs press together to hide his most vulnerable area, not until you slide a hand between them and spread his legs wide open, that is.

“MmmMMmM… o-ok, I did my part, now you have to– aah~ Stop it–” the puppet whines as you rub your hand over his tiny cock, jumbling his thoughts. Precum has already left a stain where the tip is, and it flows through more of the thin fabric as you stroke the underside of his dick with your fingers. “you have to hold up your end of the bargain, right? mmMPH–!”

“I suppose I do. Then, tell me what you want me to do next~” your reply in a silky smooth tone. Within seconds Scaramouche is guiding your hands underneath those cheap panties, letting out an adorable gasp when your fingernails graze his sensitive cock.

“Stroke it, and don't stop unless I tell you to.” With a sultry yet mocking 'yes sir', you continue your earlier motions. Using your extensive knowledge of your partner's sexual preferences, it's only a matter of minutes before you get him wet and needy. Scaramouche has wrapped his arms around your neck, keeping the two of you tethered while his dick leaks all over his tummy. The skimpy costume is long since tainted with the scent of sex and sweat — and he hasn't even cum yet!

The puppet lets out a desperate whine, panting your next order with urgency; “Here! In here!” he guides your hand down to his wet hole, coated in his own juices that have been dribbling down his ass the whole time. You sink in up to the first knuckle and Scaramouche chokes on his moan — your other hand has remained wrapped around his little cock, just as he demanded, bringing an endless flow of pleasure to his hazy brain.

“AhHN– deeper! F-finger me more! aaAHH–!!” his body jerks as you insert your entire index finger into his ass. Scaramouche grits his teeth, humping his cock against your palm while you work his hole open.

When he feels ready enough, he tells you to stop, pulling off the soiled panties himself and demanding for you to take out your dick and fuck him with him.

“yyeEESS-! mmph~” Scaramouche groans as you slide your thick shaft inside. “Bury it deeper—deeper! mHM-MM like that~” His walls clamp down on your dick, preventing you from leaving his hot insides even if you wanted to (and you don't~ 💖). Watching your lover unravel beneath you in that slutty get-up keeps your cock rock solid as it rams his cute little hole—splitting him in two with every thrust.

Grabbing his waist a little too tightly, you control Scara's movement, preventing your dick from going more than halfway in—which earns a growl from the puppet. “–the hell are you doing? I didn't say slow down.”

“Do you want to cum?” What kind of a question is that? Of course he does! Scaramouche can feel his balls tighten as you fuck him, preparing a load bigger than you would expect someone of his size to be able to produce. His hole aches to be filled again — ready to receive your own load all in his guts.

“Yes! K-keep— hnmgh don't stop pleeease!”

Frustrated, Scaramouche claws into your forearms, while you simply hold him still and smirk down at his bratty form. “Well, you did ask nicely.” you laugh, thrusting back inside so far that you can feel your cock hit the off switch on his brain. “Gonna give me a nice big cumshot, right? All over that pretty tummy of yours?” The only response the puppet can muster is a vigorous nod and a whimper.

“Yeah? Good, good. Fuck… cum for daddy, Scara. Give daddy that fuckin' load, huh?”

Like a magic word, that was all it took to push Scaramouche over the edge — bringing him to a shuddering climax as he shouts “Yes yes yes! Please, daddy, gonna c-cumMM—!! 💙” His voice falters as he cums — shooting the warm substance onto his own pelvis while his eyes cross. That pornographic expression Scaramouche wears causes you to cum soon after, filling his tiny body with your warmth.

Though he doesn't physically have a heart, you still swear that you can hear the rapid beating in his chest as Scaramouche settles down, regaining his senses while you gently stroke his cheek.

Your body gives out, collapsing on his chest as you both pass out for an indiscernible amount of time. “Hey, pretty boy, how ya feeling?” you ask with a groggy voice, brushing a bit of hair away from his eyes.

Stretching his arms out, Scara replies “Sore, tired… but it felt nice too, I guess.” he turns his face away from you as he adds that last part, finding it embarrassing to admit such a thing. You chuckle at his sudden shyness and lean your head down to place a kiss on his cheek, then his nose when he turns his head back to glare at you weakly.

Before you get up to clean yourselves off, you keep Scaramouche pinned, not yet ready to let go as you assault his face, neck, chest, and hands with kisses.

“Oh, but… but, my love, you would look so pretty in the clothing I chose for you.” you feign disappointment, frowning as you fake a sniffle. Kinich crosses his arms and stares at you, clearly not falling for the act.

With a huff, you drop the false sadness and straighten your stance. “Alright, Mr. No Fun, can we still have sex though?”

Only someone who understands the saurian hunter intimately would notice the spark of emotion in those gorgeous eyes—and the slight twitch of his lip before he answers you — “Yes, just stop pouting.”

You sigh in relief, closing the distance between you and your lover and cupping his cheeks as you breath “Thank you…” Kinich uncrosses his arms, placing a gloved hand on your cheek and leaning closer. The kisses start off chaste and gentle, but as you taste more and more of your lover on your lips, you feel the addiction creeping in. Gradually, the kisses become longer—deeper. Kinich allows your tongue to slip past his lips with zero resistance, and he lets a single moan out as you pull him closer.

“I jus'… needed you today.” you slur between hot kisses. “Haah… gods, I really fuckin' need you, Kinich. Lemme know if this is too much, please–” With a soft thud, Kinich falls onto your mattress. His hands snake around your body as it presses against his—pinning him down while you desperately trail kisses down his neck.

The saurian hunter makes no effort to resist, even tugging at the waist of your pants; just as impatient as you are. “No, it's… it's fine. Mm, this is nice.”

Suddenly, his clothes are too tight, and everything feels way too hot as his loving partner assaults him with affection. Groping at Kinich's chest proves to be the secret at making him melt even faster; his nipples harden under the tight fabric, making it that much easier to play with them and make your sweetheart arch his back.

Something catches his attention — pointing his gaze down a little, Kinich notices how hard you've become just from a bit of making out. Your pants struggle to contain your excitement, and your lover finds it hard to contain his own now. You notice Kinich staring, and his cheeks heat up at the humiliation of getting caught. “See something you like?” you tease.

His reply is snarky, but the look in his eyes betrays that tone. “You wish.” After that sass, you decide to tease your darling a bit.

Taking your index finger and dragging it down his chest, flicking over one of his nipples in the process, until you reach that big jacket tied around his waist. Your hand dips underneath, reaching further down until… “Ooh, so wet already? Your body can't lie, you know.”

At this, Kinich rolls his eyes, which devolves into his eyes rolling back as you rub your thumb around his slit. His cock twitches in your hand, dribbling precum down his skin. Your tone drops to something more sultry and intimidating as you question Kinich; “You do like what you see. You want to feel relief—to cum and relieve all of that pent up tension—am I right?”

He can only nod his head reluctantly, succumbing to your devious scheme without entirely realizing it. You stroke his cock once and the sickening slick noise that it makes causes Kinich to squirm under your know-it-all gaze. You pretend to think for a second, then offer, “You know, I have a solution that I think we'll both love~”

“I'm not wearing that stupid—”

“JUST hear me out;” you interject, “if you wear that pretty costume for me, I will do whatever you want, you need only give me the order. Sounds like a fair price, doesn't it?”

The gears turn in Kinich's head for a moment, before he lets out a sigh of defeat. “You'll do anything I want?”

“Anything. Your wish is my command.” you reassure.

“This must be some costume if you're willing to give me control just like that.” a faint smirk makes itself onto the saurian hunter's features.

You laugh as the image of the costume comes to mind. “See for yourself — I left it in the drawer over there, in case you changed your mind~”

—

Five minutes later, your beloved emerges from the corner of the room where he went to change into this silly thing. “This is what you're into? Really?”

You take that as your cue to turn around. Immediately, your eyes light up at the glorious view before you: Kinich—in all of his perfection—wearing a blasphemous version of a maid uniform. It's mostly white frills that leave nothing to the imagination, white sheer thigh highs, and a frilly headband. The costume does a wonderful job showing off all of your darling's best assets; like his arm muscles, thighs, and his ass that isn't covered at all at the back of the dress.

Kinich rolls his eyes again as he takes a seat at the end of the bed. Now that he's sitting, his cock pokes up under the tiny skirt, attracting your lustful eye with ease. This does not go unnoticed. “See something you like?” he mocks.

You can only bite your lip as you nod, still staring directly at his boner as it creates a glaring shape, and a darkening spot where his cock is leaking through the frills. Kinich motions for you to come closer, leaving you to stand there in front of him while his confidence rises through the roof at your display of compliance. “Kneel.” you drop to your knees instantly, nearly drooling at the thought of what's to come next.

“Say 'aaah'.” you open your mouth obediently, and watch as Kinich flips the skirt up, revealing his twitching dick. He guides it into your wet mouth, petting your hair while you wrap your lips around his tip and begin to suck. You hum happily around his cock, adjusting to his size as the minutes pass.

Kinich notices you fidgeting restlessly, and offers “You wanna put your hands on me?” you nod and whine around his cock. “Go ahead.” he allows, placing your hands on his thighs so that you can mindlessly rub and squeeze them while you suck him off. Kinich holds the back of your head, and you let your mouth hang open so he can fuck your throat freely. You can't help gagging as he pleasures himself with your mouth, but it's not a bad feeling. You're just happy that you can have someone so amazing in this way.

Even with something filling your mouth, you're still hungry for more. You've let Kinich control the pace until now—until you wrap your arms around the backs of his thighs and hold him still while you suck him silly.

The saurian hunter can't hold in the shameless moan that comes out as he tips his head back, filling up your mouth with his load. “mmMhM! Y-yes-!” Kinich reaches behind him, grabbing the sheets in his fist as he rides out his orgasm by humping your face—all while you leave handprints on his thighs from how hard you've been holding them.

His cock pops out of your mouth, still connected by a string of cum, and you pant as air fills your lungs again. Kinich's vision is blurry, but he can faintly make out your half-lidded eyes as you look up at him, sticking out your tongue to show that you swallowed it all.

“Damn, that was pretty intense. I guess I should wear this more often if it means being rewarded like that.” he smiles, leaning back on one hand and using the other to pet your hair.

“Yeah, you should.” you reply, pushing his chest so that he falls backwards as you stand up. Now you tower over your shaky lover, scanning over his body and savoring every curve and muscle as you do.

Kinich winces when you pull him flush against you by his thighs. “What…?”

“Did you really think I would be satisfied with just that? Please, Kinich, that was only the beginning.” you tease, “There's so much more I want to do to you while you're still wearing this~”

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Death Wish 9

Warnings: non/dubcon, mentions of crime, violence/abuse and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

Character: mob!Bucky Barnes

Part of the mob drabbles au

Summary: you’re desperate for a way out of your life and you ask a powerful man for help (plus!reader)

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging ❤️

Photo Inspo

The doorbell buzzes. You loathe that noise. You stay as you are, unbothered by the visitor. You already hear Kitty asking Adrienne who it could be. 

You continue to shuffle through the contents of the cigar box. You’re neither surprised or disgusted by the love letters. You know your mother’s writing and you know it isn’t here. You always assumed your father was rotten to the core. No, you were certain of it. The proof only makes you feel worse for your mother. 

The door opens. There’s voices. Soft tones. Kitty’s, Adrienne’s and... his. 

Then, footfalls that ascend the stairs. Too heavy to be your sisters’. You close the box and toss it in the black bag. There is not box to keep. All your father’s stuff needs to go. You have no use for it. 

“You know I’m here,” Barnes says as he appears in the doorway. 

“I do,” you take the old baseball your father made you catch as a girl. He was always disappointed he never had a son. It makes you want to smile knowing he never got the thing he wanted the most. 

“You’ve had your time to mourn,” he says, and nothing else. His meaning is clear. 

You drop the ball and get off the floor. You cross to him with your head down. He’s stoic and still. You reach for his hand. That makes him flinch. As if he’s surprised. He lets you lift it and you kiss the ring on his pinky. 

You let him go and look him in the face, “he’s gone. It’s over. Let’s move on.” 

His brow arches and his eyes narrow. “You understand what happens now?” 

“You take care of my sisters. That’s all that matters to me.” 

“All about family,” he remarks. “Well, real family.” 

You’re silent. You don’t know what he wants you to say. Your heart is in your throat, can’t he see it beating there, choking you. 

“I showed you my loyalty. I did that and I will never tell a soul.” 

“Oh, I know, doll,” he smirks and shifts his weight. It’s your turn to wince as he brushes his knuckles along your cheek. “I don’t just want that loyalty for one night.” 

You blink and fight not to let your fear show. It’s all so uncertain yet deep down you know exactly what he means. It just seems all too much. 

“Sit down,” he drops his hand and turns. He shuts the door. 

You avoid your father’s bed and instead, sit at the vanity where your mother would perch and apply her night cream. He paces and puts his hands in his pockets. He exhales and measures the air. 

“It’s sorted. Everyone knows what happened. Vengeance is taken, the tables are balanced,” he says. “So we move forward. Your sisters are protected. They will have roofs over their head. You will too.” 

You stare at him, waiting for the other shoe. 

“Doll,” he tilts his head, “why are you looking at me like that?” 

“Just say it,” you sniff. 

“Say what?” 

“Tell me what it costs,” you sneer. 

He snickers, “that’s what I admire about you. You don’t beat around the bush. You come to my office, tell me to off daddy. You won’t even let me charm ya, dammit. You just wanna get down to business.” 

“Please,” you beg. “I... I can’t take any more.” 

His expression softens and he approaches you delicately, like an animal he doesn’t want to scare off, “we’re gonna have a big wedding, doll. You’re gonna wear the most expensive thing you can find, and we’re gonna drive off into the sunset together.” 

You gulp and search his face. It sounds ridiculous. You don’t know this man, he doesn’t know you. Yet, he’s the only man who knows what you did. Who know that you could do something like that. 

“Ah, come on, I’m a real man,” he unbuttons his jacket and reaches inside. “I’m more than words.” He takes out a hexagonal velvet box. “So, let me know if it fits.” 

You hesitate but accept the box. You open it with some effort, the hinges are tight. You snap the lid up and stare at the ring within. It has a large teardrop diamond at the center and four decent sized ovals to each side, with little round diamonds worked in between. The gold gleams with the elaborate style of the thick band. 

You slide it out and turn it in your fingers. It has to be worth more than all the stuff your daddy pawned off. More than even this house. You roll it over again and line up your finger with the band. You push into it and it fits snugly below your knuckle, covering half your finger. 

“Too big,” you say. 

“Loose?” He wonders as he leans a hand on the vanity table. 

“No, it’s... clunky,” you wiggle your hand. 

“Never thought I’d hear a woman complain a rock was too big,” he says. “Doll, I expect you to show off. You’re mine, I’m yours. That’s something to brag about.” 

“Flashy. Distracting,” you comment. 

“Any man stupid enough to try to steal that off ya, he won’t be thinking much longer,” he insists and grabs your hand. “Come here.” 

He tugs you until your standing. He admires the ring on your finger and his cheeks dimple as he grins. He puts your hand on his shoulder and wraps his other arm around you. Sweat beads across your scalp and down your back. He’s so close you can smell his mellow cologne. 

“Always good to have more to love, isn’t it?” his fingers curl into the cushion of your hip as he crushes you against him. He brings his palm up to cradle your face as his eyes drift down to your lips. He purrs and rocks you.  

You shudder as your breath catches in your chest. The idea never fully bloomed in your head. You never dared to imagine this. Yet here it and it’s more startling than anything you could ever fathom. 

He turns his hand to frame your chin and pulls you even closer. He leans in and presses his mouth to yours. His beard tickles you as his lips caress yours and his tongue pokes out coyly. You close your eyes as you open up to let him in. 

Your heart thrums behind your ears as you seal your deal with that kiss. You didn’t barter for your freedom, just another master. 

[ceaselesswatchersspecialboy]

Do the twins ever get attached to stanfraud? Does bill get attached to them too? what is their relationship like? and what is their immediate reaction to finding out everything was a lie -- first impressions? GAAHH I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS i'm ur biggest fan bro

Thank you so much!! It really means a lot that people are enjoying my madness this much!

It’s funny because earlier I was actually doodling him and the twins!

He absolutely gets attached and they get attached in return. While their initial introduction to him is very rocky, they come to enjoy his quirks and unusual interests, especially once Dipper puts together he was the author, and he regularly supervises them on adventures, mainly because Stan asked him too, but also because it’s strangely fun. He will repeatedly claim he hasn’t gone soft to Stan, but then Stan will find him fast asleep with the twins curled up against him, or he’ll catch him helping the twins in their respective Dipper and Mabel’s guide videos. He also likes Mabel Juice! Mabel won’t take his suggestion of adding eyeballs though. Alas.

His feelings towards them are made complicated by his own denial. He doesn’t like the idea that he’s changed much at all, and these new doubts he’s experiencing about his original plans are not thoughts he’s willing to entertain for long. He gets snappy when Stan tries to reassure him it’s okay that he cares, because he doesn’t care, he’s just… playing a role. That’s all. It’s all one big lie. He can do lies. But that doesn’t really explain the genuine panic he experiences when Dipper and Mabel are in danger, and how quickly he jumps in to protect them nor does it explain the fuzzy feeling in his chest when Mabel knits him a sweater.

He’s not the same as he was thirty years ago. That’s a fact. And thirty years was once just a blip for him, but this has felt like he’s lived a whole new life.

And on the flip side, Dipper and Mabel care a lot too. He’s off-putting and he’s strange and he says some things that imply he may have committed murder and gotten away with it, but they like being around him. It isn’t always perfect, same as it is with Stan, but the rougher patches don’t tend to last, and they reconcile by the end of the day (although, Bill is usually incapable of saying sorry verbally and shows his apology through actions instead).

Dipper for one hasn’t really had anyone he can just ramble about nerd stuff with. Bill can actually keep up with Dipper, and they both find themselves enjoying the debate they have about inter dimensional travel, or what sort of haunting would be the most annoying to deal with. Dipper does sometimes catch his uncle looking at him strangely though, almost as though he’s seeing right through Dipper and looking at someone else, but he blinks and the odd look is gone, so he must have imagined it.

Bill does sometimes push Dipper’s buttons, of course, and never gives him direct answers, usually making him look for the answer himself, or read between the lines, which Dipper comes to appreciate as it, so he claims, trains his mind for mysteries. They have a very fun back and forth, honestly. Dipper thinks Stanfraud is the coolest despite all the annoyances, and he really does try his best to impress him.

Mabel meanwhile is just her usual bundle of energy, and charms her great uncle by involving him in her unhinged hijinks, and showing him the art of glitter bombing. She meets him where he’s at! Even though he can sometimes be a little extreme, even for her, she pushes herself out of her comfort zone, mainly because of what Stan told her, about how Ford lost his mind while alone. Well, she can’t have that! She makes a real effort trying to understand him, and why he thinks the way he does.

He also weirdly gives her some good advice whenever Pacifica tries to bring her down, and Mabel is both comforted and inspired by how weird he is, even in his old age. He never lets anyone shame him out of it, and he encourages Mabel to just “Be weird! Your fleshbag life is short! Why waste it caring what lesser skin puppets think?”

Bill unknowingly allows both Dipper and Mabel to feel more comfortable in themselves because of how unapologetically ‘him’ he is.

Sorry if this is messy, by the way, I’m just writing my thoughts as I go along.

Anywho, I think all of this makes finding out everything was a lie very hard hitting for them. Mabel tries to rationalise it, that sure, maybe he wasn’t really their Grunkle, but he still loved them like he was, and they loved him like a Grunkle, meanwhile Dipper reacts very negatively, because he really thought he had found someone like him, someone he confided a lot in, and now he thinks he made the wrong choice, that he was an idiot.

And Stan lied too. He admits the biggest mistake he made was not telling them, but it’s too late for that now.

The one bright side, if you can call it that, is Stan and Bill do tell them before they get Ford back. They think they’ve finally found the way to do it, and Stan wants the kids to know before they try it, give them time to process.

Okay I’ll end there for now! Thank you so much again!

[seulw0nz]

MORE THAN MY FAKE DATE : 이희승

heeseung x f!reader warnings not fully proofread && 1090wc 𓈃 ♡ fluff, oneshot, fake dating, inspired by all the boys i've loved before ─── ୨୧

THE CAFETERIA IS BUZZING, a blend of laughter, conversations, and the clatter of trays. you and heeseung are seated across from each other, a half-eaten plate of fries between you, but neither of you is really paying attention to the food.

“okay, let’s get this straight,” heeseung says, leaning forward, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. “no telling my mom about our ‘relationship.’ she’s already on my case about finding a nice girl.”

you raise an eyebrow, crossing your arms. “deal, but only if you promise not to make it too believable around my friends. yunjin has a tendency to make everything dramatic, and i’m not in the mood for her wedding-themed pinterest board to start filling up.”

heeseung’s laugh is warm, effortless, and for a moment, you forget the whole reason you’re sitting here, planning out a fake relationship. “pinterest boards aside, you really think i’d take it that far?” he teases. “i’m not that committed.”

you pick up a fry and wave it in the air before popping it into your mouth. “you? committed? please. the day you take something seriously is the day pigs fly.”

heeseung’s eyes narrow playfully. “i take some things seriously.”

“like what?” you challenge, tilting your head.

“like making this fake relationship believable enough so we don’t look stupid,” he retorts, leaning back in his chair, his grin broadening. “besides, aren’t you the one who came up with this whole plan?”

you roll your eyes, reaching for another fry. “oh, right. blame me. as if you weren’t desperate to keep your ex from thinking you’re miserable.”

heeseung gasps, clutching his chest in mock horror. “wow, that’s low. even for you.”

you shrug, a smile tugging at your lips. “just telling it like it is.”

heeseung leans forward, his tone softening just a little. “okay, fine. back to the rules.” he pauses, eyes twinkling with mischief. “number one: no real feelings.”

your heart skips, but you hide it with a laugh. “duh. that’s the whole point.”

“good,” he says, tapping the table for emphasis. “number two: no kissing unless it’s absolutely necessary.”

“define ‘absolutely necessary,’” you retort, leaning in to mimic his serious expression. “because your definition might be skewed.”

heeseung’s ears turn pink, but he clears his throat. “you know, like if we’re in public and everyone’s watching. or if my ex just happens to be nearby.”

“you mean like she is right now?” you ask, nodding subtly toward the far end of the cafeteria, where she’s sitting with her friends.

heeseung’s jaw clenches, but he quickly recovers. “right. like now.” he shifts, and for a split second, there’s hesitation in his eyes. “so… should we? you know. to sell it.”

your heart flutters, but you bite your lip, trying to seem unaffected. “maybe just… hold my hand instead.”

he doesn’t hesitate, his fingers slipping between yours, and suddenly, the entire cafeteria feels smaller. “better?” he asks, his voice quieter.

you nod, ignoring the warmth spreading through you. “yeah. way more convincing.”

heeseung’s grin returns, and it’s like the moment of seriousness never happened. “good. because you know, i wouldn’t want to make anything awkward.”

you groan, yanking your hand away. “ugh, you’re the worst.”

he laughs, eyes crinkling. “admit it. you’d be bored without me.”

“please,” you scoff, but your smile gives you away. “i’d be thriving.”

heeseung nudges the plate of fries toward you. “sure, sure. keep telling yourself that.”

[robo-writing]

we’re being horny on main ?? BEAUTIFUL. LETS GO GIRLS (gender neutral)

imagine period sex with Logan, y’all start making out and reader stops him before it goes too far to let him know that it’s shark week. He asks:

“You sayin’ that because you think I’ll find it gross, or because you feel gross and don’t want to fuck right now.”

because sadly men tend to find period sex disgusting and maybe it makes reader feel gross in return. Logan assures them that he’s seen plenty of blood in his lifetime and had plenty on his hands as well, he literally doesnt give a fuck about period blood. he just wants to make his pretty baby feel good, and orgasms help ease cramps too.

….this totally didn’t spawn from Logan laughing and grinning when Wade’s blood splashed in his mouth or anything 👉👈

Between his wandering hands and worshipping touch, there's a growing worry eating at you alive, one that he's able to sense far too well. Almost as soon as it begins, you stop, and it takes one worried look at you before Logan's grilling you for answers.

Something's different this time—you're hiding something. And he's not going to continue until you tell him. "What's on your mind doll?" He says. "Nothing," you lie. "Just don't feel up for it is all." "Okay, there's nothing wrong with that," his hands smooth over your ruffled shirt, his attempt at making you feel a bit more comfortable. "But that's not what I asked." It's times like this where you hate how perceptive he is, how he's so quick to know your tells. He stares you down until you finally relent with a sigh, looking away from him. "I'm on my period." "So?" A pause. "Logan, I'm on my period." "Yeah, you said that already." He answers annoyed. "Your point being?" "Logan, I get that you're a gentleman and I love you for it, but it's okay if you don't want to continue—" "Okay, wait, lemme get this straight," He interrupts you with a shake of his head. "You don't wanna keep going because you're on your period and you think I care?" There's a palpable silence between the both of you, laced with confusion. "Well, don't you?" You don't know how you expected him to react, but laughing wasn't on your list. A real, chest-bursting laugh reaching your ears, immediately followed by his arms around your torso. "Doll, I couldn't give two shits about what time of the month it is, the last thing I'm afraid of is a little blood." His voice is like honey in your ear, a reassurance that sets your mind at ease and causes your body to relax in his hold. You can tell he meant every word, and if you needed any further evidence, you can feel exhibit B currently prodding against your thigh. "Now, since we've cleared that up—lie back and lemme handle the rest."

[bougiebutchbinch]

I’m back to talk about transfemme Wade (who I think would refuse to go by Wanda bc “we already have one of them, don’t wanna confuse the fans!”) but in an embarrassing amount of thought so anon-

I feel like she has so many wigs that sit along the wall of their room, one for every occasion (Logan talked her out of getting a massive Miku length one bc she would never take care of it Well enough-), her favorite is the Barbie of just a cute blonde ponytail that sometimes she’d clip colorful strips into. Sometimes she showers wearing a wig for the Euphoria of her bf being pissed there’s a bunch of plastic in the drain- she goes through so many phases of what style she likes, their living room was full of amazon boxes at some point and Logan was ‘forced’ to sit through a fashion show and give his opinions, and while he doesn’t know the difference between Lolita (THE STYLE THE STYLE!!!!) and Harijuku, all he knows is his girl is beaming and rambling a mile a minute and he can’t make himself veto any outfit she shows off. Unfortunately his real favorite look of hers involves the same t shirts and boxers she wore before coming out, no makeup, no wig, face mushed into his chest and just Content as can be. He doesn’t care about her putting on a big effort to look femme (though will always lovingly praise looks so the RSD doesn’t trigger), as long as she’s happy and safe, he’s so lucky to have her 🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷 anyways I go ESPLODE NOW thinking of my self ship with her-

WAILS AND RUBS MY FACE ALL OVER THIS LIKE A HAPPY CAT

AWHHHHHHH

she is everything to me. EVERYTHINGGGGG

[UNDER A CUT for discussions of bottom dysphoria - as well as related self-inflicted violence, but in a Poolverine way where violence is consensual and sexy and fun for everyone involved!]

I need her to be happy and to find joy and to have a million wigs and for Logan to love her just as much with them as without them, while bitching something rotten while he pulls the gross wads of plastic faux-hair out the drain

I need her to drape herself over Logan's lap like a happy housecat only Logan's the one who starts (embarrassedly) purring as he strokes her because he's so delighted and comfortable in his life right now~ And Wade is just being VIBRATED by the very loud proof of her boyfriend's love of her.... And she is smiling the GOOFIEST grin while Logan turns bright red!

I need her to turn to Logan after a long day of murder and they start pulling voraciously at each other's clothes - only Logan freezes STARSTRUCK because. Damn. And Wade's kinda confused and a bit self conscious, but tries to hide it under jokes until Logan says in this gruff, choked voice - "You look so fucking good in red" and she looks down to see where she's pulling off her costume and she's just fucking covered in this glossy red satin dress of her own blood ❤️

(And Logan maybe buys her a long red evening dress that she's probably never gonna have occasion to wear, but he's flushing so much when he presents it that he almost matches the colour, and he wants to see her in it so bad, and whenever Wade wears it around the house just casually, she gets picked up and fucked against the nearest wall lmao)

I need Logan dipping her effortlessly in a kiss, and she feels so fucking weightless in his arms ❤️

I need them baking together before Laura comes around and they both keep burning shit but they're laughing and having a good time and there's a smudge of flour on Wade's nose and Logan is imploding internally over how cute she is

I also need her to casually say to Logan one day when the Bottom Dysphoria is particularly bad, 'hey can you chop off my dick while fucking me and then just keep chopping it off whenever it tries to grow back??' and Logan is like 'what the fuck babe' and 'I have a vague sense that I shouldn't enable this' and 'babe are you fucking sure' and Wade is like 'yeah I get off on pain and that would make me very very happy, plus it will do no lasting damage <3' and Logan is like 'OOKAY I GUESS' and then they have fun horrific bloody mutilation sex that would look absolutely awful to anyone else but is actually very tender and affirming and cute

[yandere-daydreams]

Let's say the reader actually did leave the country. Somehow managed to get money to do so as well (I feel like Geto would be the type to stash money under the bed. Doesn't trust nonsorcerers handling his money kinda deal) Would he track reader down?

I can definitely see him going the manipulative route where he's like. "I've changed" and all the other bullshit excuses. Also, I can imagine Reader freaking out on their own, he's probably had them locked away so badly that they're not even used to society anymore. So much that maybe crawling back to Geto would be a better option? Though he would for sure make sure they could never escape again.

this is in reference to my divorce hcs, as seen here.

honestly i do not think there is any fate worse than being with suguru,,, even if you are hungry, cold, struggling, and terrified of anyone and everyone you cross paths with, you've just got to remind yourself that all of those things would still be true if you were with suguru and you'd have to do it all in a pair of cat ears and a muzzle. at least, like this, you get to suffer with your humanity in-tact.

but, if you do get away, then he will come after you, and if he comes after you, then he's not going home without you safely tucked away in his arms. if you're doing poorly enough, there's a good chance he might try to be civil about it, that he'll show up on your shoebox apartment with those big, sad eyes and a 'i can't live without you' kind of tone, telling you all about how sorry he is, how much the girls miss you, how if you'd only told him you were unhappy, he would've done anything in his power to change. and, if you go home without a fight (less because you believe him and more because you realize there's no better way out of this), he might even try to change, to be a good husband, to give you the illusion of freedom where he denies you the real thing. you'll still be in a cage, of course, but the bars will much better hidden then before.

if you're doing well for yourself or just out-right refuse to talk to him in the prior scenario, he won't play as nice. anyone else might have trouble smuggling an unconscious captive across national borders, but suguru's got a way of talking to people, and it won't be long until you're being ferried back to your rightful home by the loyalist members of his cult. you'll have some immediate restrictions to deal with (a broken ankle, the leash keeping you tied to his bedpost, etc.), but your worst punishments will be much more long-term. he may have been kind enough to leave you some privacy in your previous arrangement, but now, he's not going to be able to breathe unless you're sitting pretty in his lap, hands bound behind your back and mouth stuffed with something thick enough to muffle your complaints into senseless, pretty noises. no more afternoons spent in his temple courtyard, no more books or games or creature comforts - just suguru and whatever whims he deems fit to bend you to, that day. he might like to pass himself off as a loving owner, but let no one say he doesn't keep his most precious pet on a short leash.

[dalishious]

Veilguard Companion First Impressions

So, I’ve finally recruited all the companions for the Veilguard! And as such, I thought I’d share my initial thoughts on them each.

Please keep in mind that as the title says, these are just my first impressions. I am nowhere near finishing the game yet. My thoughts very well may change after getting to know the characters more as the story progresses. Also, please do not take any opinions you do not share as a personal attack against you.

Bellara

Bellara might be my #1 favourite.

I’ve seen some people just say Bellara is “a Merrill rip-off” but I don’t think that’s fair at all. If all it took was a few similarities to say a character is a rip-off of another character, than I can think of so many boring white cishet male characters who would be guilty of that. But heaven forbid we get more than one elven woman who is passionate about her people’s culture and history!

Frankly, I think Bellara is a breath of fresh air in terms of Dalish characters specifically. Finally, a Dalish elf who isn’t punished for being proudly Dalish by the narrative.

I also really appreciate that so much of her can be easily understood by her backstory, too. Like, her feelings of never being good enough is reflective of the very realistic grief she is experiencing.

Lucanis

If Bellara isn’t my #1 favourite, then Lucanis is. They really both dominate that spot neck in neck. I can’t decide if I want to put him in a jar and shake it to see what happens, or wrap him up tight in a quilt and give him some good coffee.

I’m just a sucker for Lucanis’s character archetype, is the thing. I love taking him out simply because he’s so much fun to have around. And in terms of companion arcs, his is the one I am most intrigued to see where it goes.

Taash

(While I haven’t personally gotten to Taash’s non-binary plot yet, I am aware Taash switches to they/them pronouns, so that’s what I’ll be using.)

The moment I met Taash felt my heart skip a beat. The only thing hotter than their appearance is their voice. I know BioWare probably left Taash out of a lot of the advertising because they wanted to keep Taash’s gender stuff a surprise, but oh my god, because of this I was taken by quite the surprise. And so far Taash seems to be the type to keep a hard outer shell to protect a much softer side, and that is yet another character archetype I really love.

Davrin

My initial gripe about Davrin’s writing being so exclusively about Assan rather than Davrin himself is slowly peeling away, I hope. While I still think its bullshit that you can welcome Assan into the Veilgaurd but not Davrin, at least I’ve finally gotten a few bits of dialogue to get to know more about him finally. I just want to keep this momentum! Because Davrin as a concept has so much potential, in my opinion, and what little bits I have gotten from him have captivated me. But I can’t tell yet if it’s intentionally part of his character that maybe he’s just a closed off person who takes a while to trust others, (a little like Taash?) Or if the writer just cared more about griffons than the actual guy. I’m really, really holding out hope for the former.

Emmrich

Emmrich is so much more charming than I expected, and I found him instantly endearing the moment we met him. I also really like that we’re finally hearing some different stances and insight on death and necromancy than we ever had before from a companion! It makes him feel so fresh and completely new!

Harding

I’ll be real with you: I was not anticipating caring about Harding so much. She was who I was originally least interested in, when the companion line-up was announced. But the direction they’re taking her in has me questioning so much about bigger lore questions.

Unfortunately, I still don’t see much in her except being a vessel for those bigger lore questions, though. Like, Harding as a person has me mildly curious at best.

Neve

I’m really sorry Neve fans, but I just find her really boring so far, in comparison to everyone else. She doesn’t have a lot going on, and what she does have going on, doesn’t really captivate me much. Maybe I was just hoping she’d have stronger stances on things than she does? I don’t know.

It could be that I just really fucked up with Neve, and it won’t be until another playthrough that I’ll get to experience more that will change my mind. Because I will admit I am very good at picking choices she disapproves of, with my first Rook.

[2danesand1cat]

The themes of regret, grief, and guilt have been in my mind lately, particularly regarding my sweet angel child-Damian.

It’s a pretty consistent theme in the comics that Damian believes he is not good enough, he’s a monster, that he’s not like his father or siblings, and that he’s full of uncontrollable anger, malice, and spite.

And while of course each batkid (and especially Bruce) have their own unique experiences with guilt and regret, I can’t help but imagine what all of that must feel like to a kid so young, who is incredibly skilled and highly intelligent, yet also very naive in a way that a child is about the world and their place in it.

Damian is frustrated when people don’t understand his harshness and his intense motivations, as it creates a barrier in the way he relates to his family. Additionally, he is barely able to step out of his own perspective as a child, preteen, and even young teenager to understand other people’s ways and motivations. This would certainly be incredibly isolating, having this drive and intensity you were tortured to develop and that you are now being told is wrong even though that’s all you know. But more than anything, he just wants to please someone, and it feels like they just keep misunderstanding him. This, of course, is not to say they didn’t try. Dick, Alfred and Bruce are his heroes for a damn good reason, but it took a great deal of time and constant redirection.

Even now, as an early teen, he’s still struggling with maintaining all the work he’s done on himself to reframe his self image and control his emotions. YOU KNOW HOW DIFFICULT IT IS FOR A 14/15 YEAR OLD TO CONTROL THEIR EMOTIONS?!?!

Do you know how much guilt and regret that must take, to keep him on track?

His desire to please is so strong because each small bit of praise that he earns reinforces this very feeble idea that, maybe, just maybe, he is good, and is doing something right. Each time he hears these things, it slowly erodes that constant weight on his tiny little shoulders of the guilt he carries everyday.

I can’t help but think of all the times he pleaded with himself and some high figure or something to “please, make me good like Richard. Help me be better. Help me be like Father. Please, please please” as silent sobs gripped his tiny frame and tears poured down onto his pillow.

Or all the times where he is sketching or training or just trying to exist and is hit with a wave of guilt as he has a flashback about his time in the league or even his early days in Gotham. Those are the days when his sketches get crumped because “it’s not worth it to even try to create something beautiful” in those moments. And how he refuses to wrap his hands as he hits the punching bag over and over again, feeling a small bit of relief at every spilt knuckle because “I deserve this pain” is all he can think.

Still til this day, as nightmares come and go, he lies there in bed and repeats to himself that “yes, that was me, i did kill, i did slaughter”, and even though what he just experienced in his dream wasn’t real, it was all at one time very, very real.

There were times when he wouldn’t eat breakfast after he lay up all night, coming to terms with his past self, reasoning that breakfast is for people that deserve it. He must instead punish his body for the its sins. Seeking comfort to placate his conscious was weakness as well. He did his best to hide his guilt and suffering from Dick and Alfred and Bruce, as it was not their cross to bear.

What he forgets, and still often forgets, is that he is and was just a child. And what he is trying to learn is that everyone has regrets, but we are not our past, we are our efforts to create a better future self. It gets a little better each day. He is trying.

At least now, he has given himself the permission to seek out the love and comfort he so desperately craves. When he silently pads into Bruce’s room at night, Bruce understands. They don’t speak, not then at least, but Damian no longer constantly denies himself the goodness that he is learning he deserves.

[persisting]

oh, absolutely. and i think we have a ton of agency as fans to create the exact version of these characters that we want based on the huge amount of writing that’s been done about them! i’m all for people picking and choosing what they want for their own personal versions of things. i think mainly for me, where the issue of “is this the puppet or the puppet master talking/acting” can come up negatively is in the posts people make wherein the poster wants to convey that they feel their chosen ideas about the characters are the “real ones.”

a lot of people really enjoy explaining dick or jason or whoever’s “real” characterization (myself included!) to an audience. the problem is that these explanations are always going to be personal to the writer of the post based on what parts of canon they personally want to vibe with and which parts they don’t. is jason secretly a natural redhead with an acrobat background? that’s been canon. does dick have a living aunt who stays at the manor with everyone? that’s also been canon. would dick angrily deny that bruce is his “father?” he’s done that on the page. would he instead directly call him “dad?” he’s done that too. does tim still have a spleen in some universe? who knows!

so mostly i think a lot of fans need reminding that sometimes your fav did the thing because the writer wanted them to, and it’s valid for other fans to see that behavior as “out of character” (because often, based on the character’s previous behavior, it kind of is.) it’s also valid to like what the writer had them say and to feel like it IS in character (hey, sometimes the writer is course correcting back to a previous characterization, or something similar.) but we all have to live with the fact that, for example, while fan 1 thinks it’s very in character for dick to angrily want to “get out from under bruce’s shadow,” fan 2 can think it’s OUT of character because of the fact that it was an editorial mandate for him to go and lead his own team and be in other books aside from batman. it’s frustrating for all of us, i think, to talk about some aspect we love or hate in a character here, and to then have someone else come along with a bunch of comic frames from various continuities to explain how you’re wrong.

i just think it’s good for the fandom overall to try to keep in mind that this is a tremendously fragmented space, and that there’s a difference between “he would/would not say that” and “he did/didn’t say it, but it seems like he did/didn’t say it for reasons outside of his usual feelings or perspectives.” this isn’t to say that i totally frown on, like, gentle fanon correction where it’s doable, or that i think talking about all the wild canons that have existed is bad or anything. i just think people get VERY assertive about things that are personal preferences in these characters, and i’ve had people insist that i “must” accept character takes that are still just personal interpretations, and it gets old. it’s definitely a fine line between fanon and “canon” sometimes, but i think people focus down too hard on what’s the “correct” canon sometimes. there are absolutely core qualities of these characters i think most of us agree on as “real,” but a lot of the window dressing is more complicated than that, and it doesn’t always exist because it was a natural path for the character at the time.

something i keep wanting to articulate about comics fandom, and characterization of comics characters, but i never quite feel like i have the right wording: sometimes a comic book character does something because the author wanted them to.

like, it’s things like two male characters being physically violent with each other when they’re emotional, or a character leaving their previous status quo for a new one, and similar stuff. batman and nightwing get physically violent with each other several times because frankly cis male writers often consider violence to be the ultimate form of male emotional outlet, whether it really would or would not be those particular characters’ actual reactions. nightwing wanted to “get out from under batman’s shadow” because editorial wanted him to so they could run him as a main hero instead of a sidekick. it’s things like that.

i think a lot of the endless essays and arguments about “correct characterizations” that circle back to “here on the page you can see the character saying/doing that very thing” are often hollow and kind of inept with this awareness that some character actions are directly invented by writer and editorial desire. of course nightwing “canonically” said this kind of dopey and contradictory thing about himself - his current writer specifically has an agenda to write him that way. of course suddenly batman will talk about how jason todd was “always violent” (he wasn’t) and “angry” (also factually untrue) because editorial wants the character to have a specific foundation for his current all over the place behavior.

like, sometimes these essays come off like you forget there are big white cis male hands up these guys asses at almost all times. sometimes they do things because it’s what they’d do. but sometimes they do things because a nerdy comic guy with intense daddy issues is making them say and do it. you’ve got to learn to separate that a bit before you publish your big screed about how dick/jason/bruce/tim is stupid/evil/abusive/annoying on their own terms, because so often the behaviors you’re mad at them for aren’t really natural character arcs and movements, they’re clumsy behind the scenes puppet fumbling. you have to learn the difference on your own.

[ilyrafe]

𝒉𝒊𝒕𝒎𝒂𝒏 ✧ 𝒓. 𝒄. | 𝒑𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝒕𝒘𝒐

pairing: hitman!rafe cameron x f!reader

warnings: none :)

word count: 1k

part one

taglist: @starkeyvhs @toterry @httpsdrewstarkey @gillybear17 @baby19sthings @zya8tracks

a/n: this is such a shitty chapter but please bear with me i had such a terrible creative block!!! god i hate it here

a stroke of luck.

when joshua was found, both rafe and y/n were far. well, rafe wasn’t that far, but she had really disappeared. the next day, rafe still wanted to send a message to her and let her know that everything was done, but that number didn’t exist anymore.

as a precaution, rafe was always around, wanting to know if there was any suspicion about joshua’s death, but apparently, everyone there knew that he was “a time bomb about to explode”. the neighbors saw y/n leaving with all of her belongings, so they assumed that he couldn’t take it and took his own life.

“i knew one of them would end up dead,” an older woman told a friend, and rafe paid attention. “and i prayed it wouldn’t be her, because she was a good person. he would get drunk and when she would say she’d leave, he’d threaten to kill her and then himself. i’ve heard their arguments!”

in the end, y/n received a good amount of life insurance for still being legally married to him. good for her.

and life went on, as it would. as it should.

rafe continued his infamous business of killing for money, and whenever someone contacted him, he was disappointed that it wasn’t her. as much as he didn’t want to admit, he always caught himself thinking about her and wondering how she was doing, if she was okay.

rafe has seen grotesque scenes that no longer bother him, but imagining joshua putting his dirty hands around her neck, or scaring her makes his blood boil, because he’s done it before with his own sister, and that’s his biggest regret. if there’s a heaven and a hell, rafe knows very well where he’s going, and he’s already come to terms with it, but one thing he’ll never do again in his life is to be violent towards another woman - any woman.

even a hitman needs to have some morals.

the fear in sarah’s eyes still disturbs him. when he goes to sleep, that’s all he dreams of. he relives the moment all night long, and then he drinks to forget it, but it doesn’t help - the image of him nearly killing his own blood is too much.

when he remembers that day at the diner, he can’t get the image of her out of his head - she looked so small, so defeated. deep down, rafe knows all of the answers to the questions he asks himself. he’s smarter than he gives himself credit for.

(...)

the life of a hitman can actually be very lonely, something rafe still struggles to deal with. every once in a while he goes for a walk in the park when his mind is going places he doesn’t want to go.

an autumn afternoon in chicago is like a scene from a painting, where nature’s colors are in their full, fiery splendor. as he steps outside, the air is crisp but not too cold, just enough to warrant a light jacket, with the occasional breeze that carries the earthy scent of fallen leaves. the city’s famous skyline stretches against a sky that shifts between deep blue and soft gray, as the sun begins its descent, casting golden light over everything.

he’s trying so hard to see beauty in things, to keep himself afloat. rafe is numb. not even the hardest drug can make him feel anything. sometimes he does admire the nature around him, and to see the blue of the sky, in its immensity, makes him realize that, in a good way, none of this is real. none of this means anything.

we are all just cells, wandering around.

the sounds of the city seem a little softer in the fall, as people slow down to take in the beauty around them. a gentle hum of traffic can be heard in the distance, while the occasional laughter of children playing outside or the sound of a distant train passing through the city adds to the ambiance.

rafe has always had a soft spot for children. well, not exactly children, but what they represent. a kind of purity that seems untouched by the complexities and burdens of the adult world. it’s in the way they see the world with wide-eyed wonder, where everything is new and full of possibility. their joy is spontaneous, like a burst of laughter that rings out without reason, simply because they are in the moment. their innocence is also in their ability to feel deeply, yet let go just as easily. they live in the present, their hearts and minds unburdened by the weight of regret or worry. oh, and their unwavering belief in the goodness of the world. that sense of trust in the world, in people, in their own ability to be loved and to love in return, is a beautiful, fragile thing, one that people often lose or forget as they grow older (rafe knows it better than anyone else), but can still glimpse in the eyes of a child.

he would give anything to feel that way again.

whenever he remembers his childhood, rafe feels a sense of regret, an overwhelming desire to find a way to go back in time. oh, if only he could. be a child with no real worries. run through the freshly mowed grass, stumble and fall, and be comforted by his mother.

perhaps his luck has run out. he’s managed to leave a life of crime behind and come out of it mostly unscathed, he can’t just think that he can expect to find love - any type of love - in the same lifetime.

while walking through the park, rafe notices a young woman sitting on the grass, enjoying an ice cream. she seems carefree, just in the moment, observing everything around her. as he walks, he manages to get closer to her and... oh my god.

it’s her.

it’s her.

with each step taken towards her, rafe feels his heart beat faster. a mix of anxiety and excitement for finally having found her, after a year.

he stops right next to her, with his hands on the front pockets of his jacket, and waits until she notices his presence. when she does, she looks up, shielding her eyes from the sun.

“hi.”

“oh, my god. cameron?!”

i'd love to know your thoughts!!!

[mamaclownhunter]

Genuinely tho- if there was a third Transmigrator: Liu Mingyan- would be the funniest.

Like she pulls a Jason Mendoza from the good place and just stays quiet. She isn’t expected to win her first fight and is over all left alone.

HECK her story has already changed because her brother- who is a pretty boy omg- is over all left alone from the plot and the story doesn’t actually require her to be openly affectionate.

So here you have whatever orientation Liu Mingyan- just living her best life in SVSSS. She is trying to figure out where the plot is going- and Luo Binghe and the Scum Villian are having a cute 180 on their relationship.

Liu Mingyan is a shameless Danmei lover. THE SCUM VILLAIN TOOK DEADLY POISON FOR THE IMMUNE HALF DEMON WHO CAN CURE HIM WITH PAPAPA she is *viberating* with ideas of this wasn’t actually kinda scary in real life.

She kinda can sit back, quietly learn the ropes be the bad ass this character is with the added bonus of getting the war god as a brother. Who again- is alive. So her whole romance plot either needs to be changed or is void now. Either way she is more invested in the Shen Quingqui and Luo Binghe situation- and then SAID BROTHER is now a RIVAL. (Be still her Danmei heart).

Luo Binghe and her are assigned to do a night hunt (organized by Shen Quingqui- this is his otp)- she is kinda not wanting to be a creep and feeling out the waters bc she doesn’t want to ship someone like a platonic found family thing. But when she is like baiting and asking what he finds ideal in a partner he one hundred percent is like “someone who is peerlessly beautiful and a master in their craft, someone who is kind and will give wisdom to everyone around them, someone who is self sacrificing even to lowly ones who don’t deserve it-.” “Like Shen-Shishu?” Cue the biggest blush and she is just nodding. “I see…. Well since you are still young you probably can’t do too much in romance.” “…. No?” (She doesn’t want to say he was accused of grooming a child in the original but she is also reading inbetween the lines and has snuck around and sees how he treats both her and Yingying- he has doting older brother vibes hard core and openly is pushing Binghe to girls his age. So she doubts that is an actual claim)

“No…. BUT if you make a foundation showing him you will grow up to be a dutiful partner in the future! You can always make him rely on you so when you are old enough to court him he really CAN’T consider anyone else because who else can do all the things he needs but you?” And Binghe is labeling her as his new best friend in his head and she internally is like (‘though if he throws you into the abyss and you come back angry and yearning that is also a fun Danmei’ which goes into her note book for future ideas)

She never interacts with Peerless Cucumber or Master Airplane. She doesn’t have to. She is making friends, playing her own brand new story- writing so much fanfiction with people who are kinda characters to her. She kinda is hella vibing though.

Binghe is chill to her even post blackening- scolding Sha Hualing for kidnapping her. Liu Mingyan only sticks around long enough to ask him how he has been. The ‘hey man, yeah I am got caught again but only so I can get these people home, how are you holding up?, still trying to revive Shen Shishu?’ She knows her Brother’s side of the story and knows he will only get worst if she also hangs around to comfort her friend so she does the return people home side for him. (She still shamelessly writes her fanfiction. Even if she knows that isn’t what is going on she is trying to keep sane here)

Listen how funny if post Mushroom Shizun getting snatched and after Shang Quinghua’s advice Binghe ALSO kinda goes to her when his spies tell him she leaves CQM, he comes out of a portal walks up to her tells her the advice he was given and she is like “shockingly- I am not against Shang Quinghua’s advice- I do need to know more about him and Mobei-Jun’s relationship now thank you- and honestly? You should for now Pin Shen-Shishu down to show him you are serious about what you want.” (Internally she is chanting freak4freak Shen Quingqui DIED came back and willingly left with Binghe swept in his arms like a damsel with her YA angry love interest)

(If she is also gay and kinda was super gay after fighting Sha Hualing- that is for whoever me ships that)

It is like really post plot and she is part of the Human partners of the general club does she connect that Shen Quingqui and Shang Quinghua are transmigrators too and she just breaks character. Shen Quingqui was low key doting on her as usual- Shang Quinghua was complaining. It got dropped she was always the favorite out of all of them- and she was like “of wives?? Sure but like I am so gay and this is better then proud immortal demon way not going to lie my guy”

Cue freak out.

Cue her learning who they are and who she is.

She has been here the whole time it is so funny.

Cue demon partners wondering if this “meme” thing is contagious bc now Liu Mingyan is laughing with them about it.

[iris-qt]

𝚙𝚞𝚖𝚙𝚔𝚒𝚗 𝚜𝚙𝚒𝚌𝚎

"You look so pretty and I love this view"

ᴛʜᴇᴏᴅᴏʀᴇ ɴᴏᴛᴛ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

✧ ʙɢ ᴍᴜꜱɪᴄ: ᴄʟɪᴄᴋ!

✧ ᴀ/ɴ: ᴍʏ ʙʀɪᴇꜰ ᴄᴏᴍᴇʙᴀᴄᴋ…ᴋɪɴᴅᴀ ʟᴀᴛᴇ ꜰᴏʀ ᴀ ᴘᴜᴍᴘᴋɪɴ ᴄᴀʀᴠɪɴɢ ꜱᴛᴏʀʏ ʙᴜᴛ ʏᴏʟᴏ!!

✧ ꜱʏɴᴏᴘꜱɪꜱ: ᴛʜᴇᴏᴅᴏʀᴇ ɴᴏᴛᴛ ɪꜱ ᴀ ᴘʀᴏ ᴀᴛ ᴍᴀɴʏ ᴛʜɪɴɢꜱ ;)…ᴘᴜᴍᴘᴋɪɴ ᴄᴀʀᴠɪɴɢ ɪꜱ ɴᴏᴛ ᴏɴᴇ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇᴍ.

If there was one thing everyone knew about Theodore Nott, it was that his competitive streak ran deep.

He approached academics like a battlefield, where every grade was a victory and every mistake a personal challenge to overcome. He didn’t just strive to pass; he needed to be the best, to outscore everyone in the class. Even if it meant late nights and meticulous notes scrawled in his precise handwriting. 

On the Quidditch field, Theodore Nott’s competitiveness sharpened to a ruthless edge. He trained with the same intensity he brought to academics, believing that every extra drill, every late practice, could be the difference between victory and defeat. For Theodore, losing was never an option.

And that is how we find him at the verge of pulling his soft brown hair out of his scalp, four strawberry-themed bandages on his fingers. 

You’d told him multiple times that you two could just stop. There was no need to go on and potentially lose a finger in the process.

But he refused because, truth be told, perhaps his competitive streak was partially… ok mostly just to impress you. His sweet girl.

Theodore clenched his jaw, staring down at the pumpkin, now bearing more accidental gashes and lopsided cuts than any real design. Yet, he shot you a determined, almost defiant look.

“You know, we don’t have to keep going,” you said gently, trying not to laugh at the orange massacre before him. “We could stop before the pumpkin looks more like it got mauled than carved.”

But he shook his head, that stubborn half-smile crossing his face. “I’m not stopping until I get it right.”

You stifled a laugh, trying to keep your expression supportive as he took another determined, if slightly shaky, stab at the pumpkin. You could see the frustration mixed with pride in his eyes, the way he bit his lip as he carved. 

“It doesn’t have to be perfect,” you said, brushing some pumpkin guts and seeds from his cheek. “You’re still amazing, pumpkin disaster and all.”

He glanced at you, cheeks coloring slightly, then quickly returned his focus to the pumpkin. “Maybe. But I’d like to be amazing and get this pumpkin to look like an actual face,” he muttered.

With a sigh, you watched him struggle on, a little amused, a little exasperated, but mostly feeling that familiar warmth at his focused eyes, his brown locks falling in front of them.

With a final, triumphant jab, Theodore stepped back, squinting at the pumpkin as if daring it to mock his efforts. He studied it with a critical eye, then turned to you, a glint of mischief flashing in his gaze.

"There," he announced, attempting a proud, nonchalant tone despite the wreckage of his masterpiece. “I carved your face. My muse.”

You raised an eyebrow, glancing between him and the pumpkin, which sported a crooked smile, one eye bigger than the other, and an overall lopsided charm. You couldn’t hold back your laugh this time. “My face? Are you saying I look like… that?”

“Precisely,” he replied with a smirk, crossing his arms as if he’d achieved some great artistic feat. “But only the best features. See? The soulful eyes. The charmingly crooked smile. It’s all there.”

You shook your head, grinning. “So I’m your muse for… horrifying pumpkin carving?”

“Exactly,” he said, trying to suppress a laugh of his own. “A true masterpiece, thanks to you.”

He reached out, fingers brushing yours, his expression softening. “You know, maybe I should make a full-body pumpkin carving of you next time...”

You raise an eyebrow at his mischievous expression.

"You'd have to get naked for that one though."

You push him away teasingly as he laughs enveloping you in a bear hug as you playfully try to fight it.

He presses kisses into your hair, and for once, his competitive streak seemed to fade, leaving just the two of you, laughing over his terrible pumpkin and the sweetness behind it.

[mmikmmik]

One underrated aspect of Mouthwashing is that it's really good as a video game.

I thought the player feedback was super strong. There's so many little gimmicky nightmare worlds and "minigames" and the game really helps you understand them very quickly and keep up the momentum. There were only a couple times I got stuck for long enough that I felt like it was breaking me out of the narrative, and I was able to resolve them pretty quickly. And one of them was my own fault - I was trying to use an item somewhere the devs had already indicated it was impossible, because I forgot about the little framing that pops up to indicate you can go into "interaction mode". That's a great little UI mechanism for making it super obvious what is and isn't interactive while still being unobtrusive and letting you feel immersed in the ship environment. Oh, and using the birthday cake scene to introduce the sawing mechanic? So when the player saws at Curly's leg, it's an incredibly powerful callback and the player already knows what they're supposed to do, defending the emotional punch from a "wait... which buttons am I supposed to press for this...?" moment? Brilliant.

Mouthwashing also has beautiful interplay between its gameplay elements and its storytelling. I think of Mouthwashing as "movie-like", because I feel like the pacing + tone + themes remind me very much of horror movies, but this story is meant to be a game. Think of the scene where Jimmy is basically telling Curly that he intends to destroy the ship. It starts with the player controlling Curly in first person POV. But right as Jimmy is talking about how Curly doesn't have agency in his own life ("You're standing at the top. Feet in cement. I get it now.") the camera escapes Curly's perspective and moves into a third person perspective, giving us our first look at pre-crash Captain Curly.

That was the last moment Curly had to avert the tragedy. He knew Jimmy had attacked Anya. Anya told Curly that Jimmy must be physically prevented from accessing the means to hurt the rest of the crew. Jimmy said it would be best if they all just died and then walked away saying "I'll take care of it" and Curly stood there watching him and did nothing. In chronological order, the next scene is the first time the player controls Jimmy. The agency and control, the status of "player character", has left Curly. He let himself become a character in Jimmy's story. And by the time he gets control again, it's already too late.

(Not that I think the game is actually presenting "player character" status as something that's true or real. Look how much Anya's internal life and deliberate choices shape the story, before and after the crash, even as Jimmy casts her as an annoying quest-giver NPC.)

I also really like how much playing through the little nightmare vignettes have the player recreate Curly and Jimmy's decisions. Like when Jimmy is forced to stare directly at the post-it note that's telling him to take responsibility (or whatever the exact words are), but he simply backs away from it. It's all about the way he finds mental and emotional loopholes to get away from what he's done, no matter how directly he's forced to confront it. What other medium could so intimately guide you through that metaphor, to express its internal logic so clearly without words? God, I love video games.