#american healthcare is not set up for this
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mariacallous · 1 day ago
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Republicans in Congress this week staggered a step forward to passing a brutal budget that would strip healthcare from those most in need, in exchange for (another) massive tax cut for the wealthy. But it could be a Pyrrhic victory for MAGA.
One bright spot is that Democrats in the House — who have struggled to figure out how to respond to a second Trump term — remained totally united in voting against the budget framework. As Trump’s approval sinks, the opposition appears to be organized and more willing to fight.
Republicans are nervous, and Democrats may have a real chance to derail their grim priorities — especially if they can connect the unpopular Republican billionaire budget to Elon Musk, the unpopular billionaire illegally and unconstitutionally rampaging through the federal government at Trump’s behest.
2017 all over again
The budget process is complicated in large part because of the filibuster in the Senate. Republicans have a 53-47 majority in the chamber, but that is not enough to reach the 60 vote threshold needed to pass legislation through normal procedures. So the GOP is planning to pass a budget through reconciliation — an expedited process that allows certain vital bills to pass without a filibuster.
Before they can vote on reconciliation, the Senate and House first need to pass budget resolutions that set out priorities and determine which committees will be responsible for expenditures, and cuts. The Senate passed a two-track budget resolution earlier this month that separates extending Trump’s tax cuts from most other spending measures. This week, the House passed its own budget resolution with only one vote to spare. Unlike the Senate bill, the House plan would roll tax cuts and all other spending into “one big beautiful bill,” as Trump calls it.
Senate and House Republicans need to agree on the same budget resolution before they can move forward on reconciliation. But the House bill sets out some terrifying priorities. In order to pass $4.5 trillion in tax cuts, the resolution orders $2 trillion in spending cuts.
The resolution instructs the House Energy and Commerce Committee to slash $880 billion from the budget. Most of that money is going to come from Medicaid which, along with the Children’s Health Insurance Program (CHIP), covers healthcare for low-income people, people with disabilities, pregnant people, and seniors — a total of one in four Americans.
If the House budget is enacted, some 15.9 million people could lose healthcare coverage. Each congressional district would lose around $2 billion in federal funds for Medicaid coverage. It’s 2017 all over again — and it’s worth remembering how poorly that effort to take away healthcare from tens of millions of people in the first year of Trump’s first term worked out for Republicans the next year, when they were waxed in the midterms and lost control of the House.
Democrats in array
In January, Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries emphasized his willingness to seek bipartisan compromise and work with Republicans. That stance infuriated the Democratic base, which deluged House members with calls demanding stronger opposition to the new Trump administration.
Those calls, and the extreme cruelty of the Republican House budget, have stiffened Democratic spines. Before the budget resolution battle on the floor, Jeffries declared Tuesday that “they will not get a single Democratic vote.”
Jeffries was true to his word. Every Democrat voted against the bill.
Only one Republican, the deficit-obsessed Thomas Massie, voted against the resolution on the grounds that it would massively increase debt (which it would). That gave Johnson an extremely narrow 217-215 win. But there are plenty of other fault lines in the GOP which could open up as the process grinds on.
Republican House members from purple districts like Nicole Malliotakis (New York) and Jeff Van Drew (New Jersey) have expressed concerns about Medicaid cuts. Johnson has papered over those concerns in part by mendaciously suggesting that the cuts he’s proposing won’t come from Medicaid, even though everyone knows they will.
It’s unclear whether Malliotakis, Van Drew, and other members in potentially vulnerable districts will vote for Medicaid cuts when they can no longer pretend that’s not what they’re doing. As political scientist Jonathan Bernstein notes, “The long-term history of the less extreme conservatives is that they regularly fold.”
On the other hand, Republicans are already facing substantial resistance and blowback from constituents angered by chaotic spending cuts and federal worker firings instituted by Trump and his sugar daddy Musk. Musk’s unilateral austerity measures included 1,000 layoffs at Veteran’s Affairs — layoffs so indiscriminate that the VA had to stumble over itself to rehire many of those fired as it realized it could not function adequately without them.
Ruthlessly stripping healthcare from veterans is popular with basically no one, and Musk’s other measures have inspired pushback as well. Belligerent constituents in Glenn Grothman’s solidly conservative Wisconsin district caught him flatfooted at his town hall, booing and jeering as he tried to tout Trump’s achievements and demanding he oppose Social Security and Medicaid cuts. Alaska’s Nick Begich hosted a virtual town hall which was flooded with constituent comments demanding he address federal job losses and illegal executive actions.
One rattled Republican, speaking anonymously, told Axios, “It would be more helpful if some of those DOGE folks showed more sensitivity to the people who are being terminated this way ... who didn't do anything wrong."
The honeymoon is already over
The anger at the town halls is showing up in polling.
Musk, who has been boasting about the cuts made by DOGE, is extremely unpopular. A Washington Post-Ipsos poll found him with 34 percent approval to 49 percent disapproval — a net 15 point deficit. Musk did have 70 percent approval among Republicans. But even there, only 56 percent said they approved of him (illegally) shutting down government programs that he decided are unnecessary.
Musk’s unpopularity seems to be undermining the president as well. Most presidents get a honeymoon bump at the start of their term, and Trump entered office on January 24 with 49.7 percent approval and 41.5 disapproval, or 8.2 points above water. A month later, his numbers in 538’s poll aggregator are sinking fast; he’s now less than one point above water.
Put it all together, and Democrats have a prime opportunity to make Musk the face of the budget deal and of the Republican Party.
Flailing House Republicans are already doing much of the work for Democrats. In a CNN interview yesterday, for example, Montana’s Ryan Zinke tried his best to avoid admitting he was willing to cut Medicaid, and ended his bumbling display of disingenuousness by citing the authority of … Elon Musk.
“Elon Musk has said there could be a trillion dollars — a trillion with a T — a trillion dollars in waste, fraud, and abuse,” Zinke burbled. (Musk himself admitted Wednesday that he’ll “make mistakes” and “won’t be perfect.”)
Again, Musk’s approval is 15 points underwater, and even Republicans are extremely skeptical that this unelected billionaire should be the one in charge of deciding whether poor people receive healthcare. Yet Republicans like Zinke are touting Musk as a guru leading the way on spending cuts, even while others like the aforementioned Malliotakis try to publicly distance themselves from DOGE’s “rash decisions.”
Democrats should take Zinke at his word and staple Musk to his shiny forehead. A great opportunity to do that is the government funding deadline, which is March 14. Congress needs to pass legislation to fund the government by then or there will be a shutdown.
Since far-right House members love any opportunity to vote against spending, Republicans in the past have relied on Democratic votes to keep government open. But Jeffries in early February told his caucus that the illegal executive assault on government programs “must be choked off in the upcoming government funding bill.” For the sake of our democracy, hopefully that means Dems will provide no votes unless there are enforceable provisions to curtail Musk’s lawless rampage.
Democrats are in the minority in the House and the Senate. As a result, they don’t have the ability to prevent budget deals from moving forward on their own. But Musk is increasingly unpopular, Trump is increasingly unpopular, and the GOP coalition is wavering. Democrats have a chance to tie every Republican to Musk’s ugly regime — and maybe even to derail Trump’s grotesque and illegal power grab.
The unified vote in the House earlier this week was a good first step. If Democrats stay united, maybe they can make March a worse month for Musk, and a better month for the country, than this miserable month of February has been.
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cura-te-ipsum · 1 year ago
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If you're wondering why you have to wait 3+ months for a doctor's appointment, this is why.
Between active COVID patients, increase in other infectious diseases, surgical complications due to increased frequency of immunocompromization, aging population bubble, people not properly taking care of themselves mid COVID (read: we were all stressed af which has physical consequence), and the rush of folks now prioritizing their health, our healthcare system is overbooked, overworked, and unable to keep up with demand. We literally do not have the facilities, staff, and resources to keep up. This is a problem across the globe, not just in the 3rd world or underserved areas.
So please, for the love of all gods, have some patience and give healthcare workers a break. When we say we don't have any openings for months, we aren't pulling your leg. It takes several years for facilities to add rooms, parking, beds, equipment, etc.
Remember, we're just human too. We can't be in two places at once. We can't have two patients in the same room at once. We can't use the same piece of equipment on two patients at once.
And please, please, PLEASE!!! If you can, GET VACCINATED, wear a mask, and stay home if you're symptomatic!!!
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Back in the 1960s, the U.S. started vaccinating kids for measles. As expected, children stopped getting measles.
But something else happened.
Childhood deaths from all infectious diseases plummeted. Even deaths from diseases like pneumonia and diarrhea were cut by half.
“So it’s really been a mystery — why do children stop dying at such high rates from all these different infections following introduction of the measles vaccine,” says Michael Mina, a postdoc in biology at Princeton University and a medical student at Emory University.
Scientists Crack A 50-Year-Old Mystery About The Measles Vaccine Photo credit: Photofusion/UIG via Getty Images
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demonicseries · 10 months ago
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Americans will make fun of British people for calling their food a silly name, and British people will make fun of Americans for policies they can’t control that contribute to the deaths of hundreds
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gingersnapwolves · 2 months ago
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You know what since I’ve got a ton of new followers because my post on puberty blockers took off and people apparently want to see me rant, I’m gonna get up on my soapbox for a PSA for tumblr’s aging userbase.
Do not! Get! A Medicare Advantage plan!
Tell your parents not to get one. Tell your aunts and uncles not to get one. Tell your friends not to get one.
Why is that, you might say? Kouri, what is a Medicare Advantage plan, you might say?
tl;dr Medicare is the government healthcare plan for Americans of a certain age or with certain disabilities. It is owned, administered, and operated by the government. You are entitled, if you wish, to outsource your Medicare and have your policy run by a commercial group, such as United HealthCare, Cigna, Aetna, et cetera.
Here’s how it works: For everyone who signs up for, say, a plan that rhymes with Figna Medicare Advantage, Medicare gives Figna a certain amount of money and says ‘use this to take care of this patient’.
You can see where this is going, right? Figna says ‘sure boss! *wink nudge*’ and then shoves as much of that money into their own pockets as possible, and they do that by finding excuses to NOT pay for your medical care.
Medicare Advantage plans are pushed and marketed heavily. They’ll call you. They’ll set up stands in your PCP office to try to encourage you to buy in. They will say things like ‘with Medicare, you have to pay a 20% coinsurance, but with us you only have a 10% coinsurance’ and completely neglect to tell you that having a smaller coinsurance only matters if they approve the fucking care that you need, which often they won’t (while Medicare would have) and if your doctors are willing to accept it, which often they don’t (while they do accept Medicare).
Is Medicare perfect? Absolutely not! I've got my share of bones to pick with them. But simply put:
Medicare is government administered. It is a service. It costs the government money, which is why the GOP is always trying to cut funding to it. Medicare Advantage is corporately administered. It is supposed to make money. Which gives them incentives to deny your care and fuck you over that Medicare simply does not have.
Do not. Get. A Medicare Advantage Plan.
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ceilidhtransing · 6 months ago
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The discussions around whether or not to vote for Kamala keep being dominated by very loud voices shouting that anyone who advocates for her “just doesn't care about Palestine!” and “is willing to overlook genocide!” and “has no moral backbone at all!” And while some of these voices will be bots, trolls, psyops - we know that this happens; we know that trying to persuade progressives to split the vote or not vote at all is a strategy employed by hostile actors - of course many of them won't be. But what this rhetoric does is continually force the “you should vote for her” crowd onto the back foot of having to go to great lengths writing entire essays justifying their choice, while the “don't vote/vote third party” crowd is basically never asked to justify their choice. It frames voting for Kamala as a deeply morally compromised position that requires extensive justification while framing not voting or voting third party as the neutral and morally clean stance.
So here's another way of looking at it. How much are you willing to accept in order to feel like you're not compromising your morals on one issue?
Are you willing to accept the 24% rise in maternal deaths - and 39% increase for Black women - that is expected under a federal abortion ban, according to the Centre for American Progress? Those percentages represent real people who are alive now who would die if the folks behind Project 2025 get their way with reproductive healthcare.
Are you willing to accept the massive acceleration of climate change that would result from the scrapping of all climate legislation? We don't have time to fuck around with the environment. A gutting of climate policy and a prioritisation of fossil fuel profits, which is explicitly promised by Trump, would set the entire world back years - years that we don't have.
Are you willing to accept the classification of transgender visibility as inherently “pornographic” and thus the removal of trans people from public life? Are you willing to accept the total elimination of legal routes for gender-affirming care? The people behind the Trump campaign want to drive queer and trans people back underground, back into the closet, back into “criminality”. This will kill people. And it's maddening that caring about this gets called “prioritising white gays over brown people abroad” as if it's not BIPOC queer and trans Americans who will suffer the most from legislative queer- and transphobia, as they always do.
Are you willing to accept the domestic deployment of the military to crack down on protests and enforce racist immigration policy? I'm sure it's going to be very easy to convince huge numbers of normal people to turn up to protests and get involved in political organising when doing so may well involve facing down an army deployed by a hardcore authoritarian operating under the precedent that nothing he does as president can ever be illegal.
Are you willing to accept a president who openly talks about wanting to be a dictator, plans on massively expanding presidential powers, dehumanises his political enemies and wants the DOJ to “go after them”, and assures his supporters they won't have to vote again? If you can't see the danger of this staring you right in the face, I don't know what to tell you. Allowing a wannabe dictator to take control of the most powerful country on earth would be absolutely disastrous for the entire world.
Are you willing to accept an enormous uptick in fascism and far-right authoritarianism worldwide? The far right in America has huge influence over an entire international network of “anti-globalists”, hardcore anti-immigrant xenophobes, transphobic extremists, and straight-up fascists. Success in America aids and emboldens these people everywhere.
Are you willing to accept an enormous number of preventable deaths if America faces a crisis in the next four years: a public health emergency, a natural disaster, an ecological catastrophe? We all saw how Trump handled Hurricane Maria in Puerto Rico. We all saw how Trump handled Covid-19. He fanned the flames of disaster with a constant flow of medical misinformation and an unspeakably dangerous undermining of public health experts. It's estimated that 40% of US pandemic deaths could have been avoided if the death rates had corresponded to those in other high-income countries. That amounts to nearly half a million people. One study from January 2021 estimated between around 4,200 and 12,200 preventable deaths attributable purely to Trump's statements about masks. We're highly unlikely to face another global pandemic in the next few years but who knows what crises are coming down the pipeline?
Are you willing to accept the attempted deportation of millions - millions - of undocumented people? This is “rounding people up and throwing them into camps where no one ever hears from them again” territory. That's a blueprint for genocide right there and it's a core tenet of both Trump's personal policy and Project 2025. And of course they wouldn't be going after white people. They most likely wouldn't even restrict their tyranny to people who are actually undocumented. Anyone racially othered as an “immigrant” would be at risk from this.
Are you willing to accept not just the continuation of the current situation in Palestine, but the absolute annihilation of Gaza and the obliteration of any hope for imminent peace? There is no way that Trump and the people behind him would not be catastrophically worse for Gaza than Kamala or even Biden. Only recently he was telling donors behind closed doors that he wanted to “set the [Palestinian] movement back 25 or 30 years” and that “any student that protests, I throw them out of the country”. This is not a man who can be pushed in a direction more conducive to peace and justice. This is a man who listens to his wealthy donors, his Christian nationalist Republican allies, and himself.
Are you willing to accept a much heightened risk of nuclear war? Obviously this is hardly a Trump policy promise. But I can't think of a single president since the Cold War who is more likely to deploy nuclear weapons, given how casually he talks about wanting to use them and how erratic and unstable he can be in his dealings with foreign leaders. To quote Foreign Policy only this year, “Trump told a crowd in January that one of the reasons he needed immunity was so that he couldn’t be indicted for using nuclear weapons on a city.” That's reassuring. I'm not even in the US and I remember four years of constant background low-level terror that Trump would take offence at something some foreign leader said or think that he needs to personally intervene in some military situation to “sort it out” and decide to launch the entire world into nuclear war. No one sane on earth wants the most powerful person on the planet to be as trigger-happy and careless with human life as he is, especially if he's running the White House like a dictator with no one ever telling him no. But depending on what Americans do in November, he may well be inflicted again on all of us, and I guess we'll all just have to hope that he doesn't do the worst thing imaginable.
“But I don't want those things! Stop accusing me of supporting things I don't support!” Yes, of course you don't want those things. None of us does. No one's saying that you actively support them. No one's accusing you of wanting Black women to die from ectopic pregnancies or of wanting to throw Hispanic people in immigrant detention centres or of wanting trans people to be outlawed (unlike, I must point out, the extremely emotive and personal accusations that get thrown around about “wanting Palestinian children to die” if you encourage people to vote for Kamala).
But if you're advocating against voting for Kamala, you are clearly willing to accept them as possible consequences of your actions. That is the deal you're making. If a terrible thing happening is the clear and easily foreseeable outcome of your action (or in the case of not voting, inaction), in a way that could have been prevented by taking a different and just as easy action, you are partly responsible for that consequence. (And no, it's not “a fear campaign” to warn people about things he's said, things he wants to do, and plans drawn up by his close allies. This is not “oooh the Democrats are trying to bully you into voting for them by making him out to be really bad so you'll feel scared and vote for Kamala!” He is really bad, in obvious and documented and irrefutable ways.)
And if you believe that “both parties are the same on Gaza” (which, you know, they really aren't, but let's just pretend that they are) then presumably you accept that the horrors being committed there will continue, in the immediate term anyway, regardless of who wins the presidency. Because there really isn't some third option that will appear and do everything we want. It's going to be one of those two. And we can talk all day about wanting a better system or how unfair it is that every presidential election only ever has two viable candidates and how small the Overton window is and all that but hell, we are less than eighty days out from the election; none of that is going to get fixed between now and November. Electoral reform is a long-term (but important!) goal, not something that can be effected in the span of a couple of months by telling people online to vote third party. There is no “instant ceasefire and peace negotiation” button that we're callously overlooking by encouraging people to vote for Kamala. (My god, if there was, we would all be pressing it.)
If we're suggesting people vote for her, it's not that we “are willing to overlook genocide” or “don't care about sacrificing brown people abroad” or whatever. Nothing is being “overlooked” here. It's that we're simply not willing to accept everything else in this post and more on top of continued atrocities in Gaza. We're not willing to take Trump and his godawful far-right authoritarian agenda as an acceptable consequence of feeling like we have the moral high ground on Palestine. I cannot stress enough that if Kamala doesn't win, we - we all, in the whole world - get Trump. Are you willing to accept that?
And one more point to address: I've seen too many people act frighteningly flippant and naïve about terrible things Trump or his campaign want to do, with the idea that people will simply be able to prevent all these bad things by “organising” and “protesting” and “collective action”. “I'm not willing to accept these things; that's why I'll fight them tooth and nail every day of their administration” - OK but if you're not even willing to cast a vote then I have doubts about your ability to form “the Resistance”, which by the way would have to involve cooperation with people of lots of progressive political stripes in order to have the manpower to be effective, and if you're so committed to political purity that you view temporarily lending your support to Kamala at the ballot box as an untenable betrayal of everything you stand for then forgive me for also doubting your ability to productively cooperate with allies on the ground with whom you don't 100% agree. Plus, if the Trump campaign gets its way, American progressives would be kept so busy trying to put out about twenty different fires at once that you'd be able to accomplish very little. Maybe you get them to soften their stance on trans healthcare but oh shit, the climate policies are still in place. But more importantly, how many people do you think will protest for abortion rights if doing so means staring down a gun? Or organise to protect their neighbours from deportation if doing so means being thrown in prison yourself? And OK, maybe you're sure that you will, but history has shown us time and time again that most people won't. Most people aren't willing to face that kind of personal risk. And a tiny number of lefties willing to risk incarceration or death to protect undocumented people or trans people or whatever other groups are targeted is sadly not enough to prevent the horrors from happening. That is small fry compared to the full might of a determined state. Of course if the worst happens and Trump wins then you should do what you can to mitigate the harm; I'm not saying you shouldn't. But really the time to act is now. You have an opportunity right here to mitigate the harm and it's called “not letting him get elected”. Act now to prevent that kind of horrific authoritarian situation from developing in the first place; don't sit this one out under the naïve belief that “we'll be able to stop it if it happens”. You won't.
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conticentimp · 1 year ago
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Maybe I want a stalker bf cos he won’t forget basic information about me (my dad asked me what my middle name is and my older brother asked how old I am) (I am salty about it)
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liminalweirdo · 8 months ago
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"We all deserve the right to protect and keep ourselves safe. Implementing a mask ban is not only an infringement on our human rights but also extremely ableist and inconsiderate of those disabled or immunocompromised.
. . .
About 1 in 5 adult New Yorkers have a disability. If a mask ban were to be implemented, spaces such as stores and restaurants might ban masking or set up mask-removal policy. That’s 1 in 5 adults no longer able to shop in public along with others, or participate in gatherings.
Forcing immunocompromised people to remove their face masks would likely violate the federal Americans with Disabilities Act and the New York State Human Rights Law. As a member of ACT UP NY, it’s always my goal to fight for human rights such as healthcare.
Those that are HIV+ are 8% more likely to be hospitalized due to COVlD than those that aren’t and are also at an increased risk of developing Long COVlD.
Masking SAVES LIVES. Masking is community care.”
Behind the Powecom KN95 is Serita @_seritasargent_ and her friend Bri’anna @lanoirede.jpg holding the #StopMaskBans sign.
MaskTogetherAmerica encourages everyone to speak up and write to elected officials to demand they oppose the anti-mask bills S9867/A10057 and S9194! We need to defend our right to masks.
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so-i-did-this-thing · 4 months ago
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American trans pals, life is going to get hard. We know that. I could write a long post about strategies for coming years, but I feel like that will only create decision paralysis here on Day 1.
So, some little things to do today and tomorrow towards becoming a more resilient person:
Refill your meds / schedule your next bloodwork appt or other healthcare visits you need - prioritize your health. If you can only do 1 thing today, do this, because it's the end of the year and you might not get on the books for a while.
Cancel a subscription you don't need, or that free trial that is about to expire - small steps to saving money
Pick up a passport form at the post office. If you don't need it, get one for a friend who does
Get a notebook and/or folder for printouts. You will use it soon for collecting hard copies of future healthcare options outside your home state, while the information can still be found online
Get a box or bin. You will want to start collecting items around your home to sell/donate/trash in the interests of downsizing. But just get a box or two today.
Talk to a friend
Get some rest
I can't promise we'll be ok, but we can try to set ourselves up so we bend instead of breaking in this storm.
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celestie0 · 20 days ago
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gojo satoru x reader | fake marriage au [18+]
in holy matriphony ch7. if u wanna get groceries
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ᰔ pairing. fake marriage au - neighbor&realtor!gojo x nurse!reader (ft. choso x reader & suguru x reader)
ᰔ summary. gojo satoru is your extremely annoying next-door-neighbor who you're pretty sure is the most insufferable man you've ever met. given the fact that you exclusively work the night shift at a chaotic emergency dept, just got broken up with your boyfriend of seven years, and have been taking care of your sick mother ever since her multitude of diagnoses, yet somehow your neighbor is the main source of stress in your life should speak volumes. but when your mother's medical bills start to skyrocket to more than you can manage, and you learn that said neighbor of yours has the best private health insurance plan in the country, you ask him to enter a matrimonial agreement with you for the spousal benefits all in the name of saving a few hundred thousand dollars. but you'll have to see if suffering cohabitation w him is worth any amount of money.
ᰔ genre/tags. fluff, smut, angst, enemies to lovers (sort of), annoyances to lovers (that's more like it), small town romance, fake marriage, next door neighbors, lots of bickering, suburban shenanigans, slow burn, mutual pining, gojo likes to play house but you don't, hatred for the american healthcare system, gojo always forgets to mow the lawn, jealousy, an insane amount of profanity, mentions of cigarettes, depression/anxiety; btw gojo in this fic is in his mid 30s n reader is in her late 20s
ᰔ warnings. reader in this fic has a sick mother w alzheimer's & cancer so there is secondary medical angst!!
ᰔ chapter. 7/x
ᰔ words. 10.3k
a/n. hiii my ihm darlings!! i don't have much to say in this beginning author's note haha but i have some author's notes at the end if you want to read them. but anywho hope you enjoy this chapterrr :)
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Ovulation is a very scary thing.
You can imagine many great women have had their lives greatly affected by this phenomenon. 
This biological release of an egg into the fallopian tubes, simply desiring to be fertilized.
Women who have had their hearts set on their dreams, aspirations, full speed ahead towards the finish line on the other end,
Only to be dragged back by–
You shudder to even mention.
Attraction to a man. 
So horrible.
So insane.
So humiliating.
And yet so–...
So natural.
Unfortunately.
You’re pretty sure Sabrina Carpenter has a song about it.
This is what you think of as you lean over the kitchen island, perched up on your elbows as you eat a peach, staring straight ahead at a certain fake husband who is seated on the couch. 
He’s looking at the TV, watching some SNL skit he didn’t get to finish last weekend, tilting his head side to side with his grey sweatpant clad legs stretched out onto the coffee table in front of him, crossed at the ankles. He’s got a can of Celsius he’s swirling around with a loose grip, his elbow up on the cushion for a more lax resting state (which unfortunately also flexes his bicep very sexily from the positioning), and he doesn’t really seem particularly amused by what he was watching. And for some reason, it was hot.
You tilt your head to the right, watching him like a predator from across the hall, chewing down on a particularly juicy piece of peach that bursts its juice in your mouth, and you curse the fact that all you can think about right now is sex.
Sex.
When was the last time you had sex?
You postulated a little over a month ago when you and Choso were still together.
Granted, you’ve been too busy and overwhelmed and overstimulated with all the recent happenings of late to provide your own self with any sort of relief.
And God, it was showing.
Showing in the way that, no matter what, you can’t seem to shake the idea of wanting to sit in Gojo’s lap and be the second reason he never gets to finish watching that SNL skit. 
Maybe it will help.
Maybe sitting in a man’s lap right now would heal you.
You set the now naked seed of peach down on the counter before straightening yourself up and walking around the kitchen island towards the living room. Gojo’s eyes don’t flicker to you until you’re well in his periphery, and when he looks up at you, he straightens himself up on the couch with curious wide eyes and drags his feet off the coffee table to plant his feet on the rug.
You pull your grandma nightgown up to your knees so that you can sit in his lap, surprise evident on his face as he watches your every movement before you’re comfortably seated on him with your hands on his shoulders.
“Fuck me,” you tell him.
“Wh–” he stutters, “I’m sorry, I could’ve sworn you just told me to fuck you.”
“That’s exactly what I said.” The heels of your hands press into his chest further to the point where it has to hurt. 
“Is this a prank,” he asks as his hands fall to hold your hips on reflex.
You sigh, shifting around on his thighs. “Can you just do it already before I change my mind?”
“Wow. That’s the most romantic thing anyone’s ever said to me.”
You roll your eyes. “Alright. I’ve changed my mind.”
You push off of his shoulders and stand up on one leg, ready to get up and away from him to find some other way to satisfy your desperate desire for a penis, but he reaches out to grab your wrist.
“Heyyy wait wait wait,” he says, pulling you back into a seat on his lap. “Why do you want to have sex all of a sudden?”
You exhale slowly, twiddling with your thumbs as you look at him. “You said it yourself the other day,” you say, “good way to relieve stress.”
“And you’re not gonna kill me afterwards?”
“Umm no promises?”
“Look, as much as I’d like to take you up on the offer, a part of me thinks you’re making a…rash decision here.”
“Oh my fucking god who cares if I am?? Maybe I just wanna fuck for the sake of fucking?? What’s the big fucking deal??”
“The big deal is that, knowing you, you’re not going to speak to me or look me in the eye for three weeks if I let you go through with something you’re not a hundred percent on.”
Your shoulders sulk a little. You thought this would be an easy yes, where he tears your nightgown off and then ravishes you whole on this couch with every primal caveman instinct that’s encoded in his XY chromosome DNA. This was supposed to be spontaneous and sexy…not a candid conversation.
The thought flashes through your head that maybe he thinks that you’re just trying to use him.
“I want to have sex with you,” you clarify. And then a pause. “I think.” You pause for a moment again. “I’m, like, pretty sure.”
He slides you back to where you’re sitting closer to his knees than to his groin, and then fully leans back onto the couch before tucking his hands behind his head like he was physically putting himself in cuffs to prevent himself from touching you any further. “Tell you what. Let’s circle back in an hour, and if you still want to, then sure.”
“I cannot believe how diplomatic you’re being about this.”
“Well isn’t this whole thing between us a diplomatic agreement? That’s what you said to me when we got fake engaged.”
“That–” you blink at him, not expecting those words to eventually be used against you, “...whatever.”
“Also, what happened to the no sex rule?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
He grins and leans forward, both of his elbows settling onto the top of the cushion behind him, and you’re proud of yourself for only staring at his biceps for 0.000034 seconds before meeting his line of sight again. 
“Are those rules just suggestions?” he asks with a stupidly teasing look on his face. 
You purse your lips together, skin feeling warm suddenly as you try to push him away by a palm to his sternum. But then you realized something. A fundamental rule of biology. The woman never chases. 
You smile at him, cheeky in a deceptive way that’s meant to scare him, and it does seem to alarm him when you push him back onto the couch rather forcefully. His hands fall to hold your hips again as he looks at you with round eyes, and you scoot forward on his lap, to where you’re almost sitting right above his groin. 
“Hey–” he says, like a warning. 
Like some awful romantic comedy, you’re drawing the tip of your nail down the front of his chest seductively, leaning forward so he catches the faint scent of the perfume you spritzed onto your skin in the morning, and you can tell it’s working from the way he tips his chin up in interest. You innocently “shift” in his lap to get comfortable, and see his throat bob when he swallows hard from the feeling. The finger that’s been running down the soft linen of his shirt trails up until it runs through the hair at the back of his neck, and he’s pulling you closer to him now by a rough grip on your hips. His breathing picks up, eyes somehow wild yet calm as he looks at you with a set jaw, and you try your best to maintain a sultry expression as you tilt your head down at him while strongly fisting at the longer strands of his hair that fall short at the nape of his neck. He shifts underneath you, sinking further into the couch, his breathing fast enough to where you can see the rise and fall of his chest, his gaze finally dropping to your lips as he parts his own, and he briefly runs his tongue over his bottom lip before–
Before the doorbell rings. 
You both blink at each other.
You don’t even realize how close you two were to making out until you realize you can’t even see the tip of his nose anymore. 
“My, uh,” he starts, voice sounding gruff so he has to clear his throat, “my wood just came.”
“Y–” you glance down at his lap, “your wood just what?!”
He leans away from you, sinking his back into the cushion and pointing over his shoulder with a thumb towards the door. “The cedar planks I ordered to finish my woodworking project. Pretty sure they just got dropped off.”
You blink at him, releasing the grip you still had on the hair at the back of his head, your arms moving to weakly rest on his shoulders instead. “Oh.”
“I’ve gotta go sign the delivery.
“Okay.”
“Sometime today, preferably.”
“Alright.”
“Can…can I head to the door? Is that allowed?”
“...I suppose.”
His fingers that were still resting under your butt in a strong grip push up gently on the flesh to prod you off of him, and you (reluctantly) swing your legs off of his lap then slump down onto the couch indignantly beside him, twiddling with your thumbs as you watch him get up off the cushions with a small grunt from the push of his palms on his knees. And then he heads to the door.
Continuing to assess your cuticles with the tuck of your chin towards your collarbone, you hear Gojo talk to whoever was at the door. Another masculine voice. Sounds younger, probably younger than you. Delivery boy. Gojo makes easy conversation with him, some buddy-buddy diction that’s entirely lost on you, and you hear the other man laugh. And the fact that you feel equally as possessed to want to fuck the delivery man makes you realize you need to put yourself in a cage the next time you feel like this.
You hear the door close along with the metallic click of the lock, and you peak your head up over the top of the couch to look at Gojo, who is leaning a giant cardboard box that looks really heavy against the wall. He then exhales, dusting his hands off and he’s stretching his neck from side to side again.
He glances over his shoulder to find you still looking at him.
“You woodwork?” you ask him.
“Yes.”
“Wait. Is that the noisy thing you do at six in the morning while I’m trying to sleep after a night shift?!?!”
“It’s not that noisy,” he says, leaning back onto the wall and crossing his arms. Then he grins. “Want to see what I’m working on?”
“No.”
“Oh come on.” He jerks his head towards the kitchen leading out to the screen door of the backyard. And then he’s shuffling his feet off into that direction. “Humor me for once.”
You slide off the couch onto the floor, grumbling something to yourself before you stand up onto your feet and shuffle your feet across the hardwood floor to follow him, the hem of your nightgown sliding across the surface.
Gojo pulls the screen door back and you step out into the pleasant afternoon. It’s sunny, with crisp air that settles on your senses, the casted shadows of clouds that slowly pass over the grass reminding you of your childhood, or perhaps of simpler times.
You step into the flip flops you see near the shoe mat, and they are nearly twice the size of your feet. Gojo opts for the dustier pair located behind the grill and then he walks across the grass of his backyard towards the shed tucked away near the side of the house. You’ve always been able to briefly see this shed from one of the windows in your house, but you could never see what went on inside. 
He unclasps the metal lock on the wooden door of the shed and pulls it open with a creak. You peer inside, the smell of wood shavings and some other rather comforting chemicals hitting you almost instantly. You also sneeze. And then sneeze again.
“Bless you,” he says, and when you glance at him, he’s smiling at you before he takes a step inside. You cross your arms and rub your elbows, feeling feeble in your ditsy nightgown as you step into a space that looks far too industrial for you. 
“See?” Gojo says once you’re fully inside the shed with him, drawing your gaze from the dusty ceilings towards the covered structure in the center of the workspace. He pulls the blue tarp back, revealing something square-looking. “It’s a coffee table.”
Your eyes widen slightly as you tilt your head to assess it. “Oh. It’s–...it’s actually quite nice.”
“Yeah.” He knocks on the surface with his knuckles. “It’s pretty sturdy. I’ve been looking to replace what I’ve got in the house for a while now. And–” he straightens himself up again, pushing his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants. “That wood I just got delivered is black walnut. Stunning stuff. I’m going to use it to finish the corners and the cabinets.”
“Ahhh,” you say, expressing interest. I mean, you were intrigued by his many strange hobbies. How can you explain this…you suppose after many years of working, sleeping, eating, and taking care of your mom, it's somewhat pleasantly disorienting to find yourself in the middle of a normal person’s life. Someone who has time to woodwork in his free time. Endearing. It was kind of endearing. 
“I’ve gotta flip it over though,” he says with a sigh, “I fucked up and forgot to build the base first.”
You lean back on one of the cabinets behind you that was level with your hip, and you watch Gojo for a moment as he bends down to assess all angles of the table before he grips the underside of it with his hands, the strength of his grip evident in the strain of the veins running up his arms and disappearing into the short sleeve cotton of his shirt. 
But he glances up at you before moving it. “Can you stand over there?”
“Huh?” You blink at him.
“Don’t want you getting hurt.”
“Oh,” you say, and realize you were standing in quite literally the exact zone of potential danger. You make a mental note to work on your survival instincts. 
You lean off of the cabinet and step off to the side. 
You watch as he begins to lift up on the table, his biceps flexing with the movement, oh and that grunt that leaves his lips once he’s got it at the angle he wants hits you somewhere you wish it didn’t. The sight of him leaning over, letting out a slow exhale as he slowly sets the table down on its side over the cushioning mat had you in a trance. 
Once he’s satisfied with wherever it’s at, he steps away from it and dusts his hands off. “Alright.” He pulls his phone out of his pocket. “Got an hour to work on this.”
You nod at him.
He glances over at you. 
You stare at him.
He stares at you.
“Did–...did you wanna watch?”
“Nope,” you say, shuffling your slippers to the other side of the door. Because you fear that catching the sight of him all sweaty and disheveled from woodworking would get you into serious trouble today. At least you know when to call it quits.
In the hour that Gojo spends doing god knows what sort of manly sorcery in that shed, you get dressed into something that wasn’t a cozy nightgown much to your dismay, and head over to your house next door. You figure you could use this time to clean up the place a little so that you can take pictures for the house on Zillow. 
When you step inside the house, the nauseating smell of medication hits you. It’s a smell that you can only know if you’ve lived with it for years. Something artificial, something that smells–...well, sick. It’s a scent you associate with sickness. It hits you randomly sometimes with the patients that you treat at the hospital. Patients that smell just like your mom does. Something akin to a pill closet. You’ve always cursed the human tendency to assort semantics to certain senses, because then it only takes away all the healing you thought you had gotten through.
You walk down the hall towards your mother’s bedroom. You figured you’d start here first, since it would be the most difficult to clean for you. Her bed is set up neatly, exactly as you left it before she left for hospice three weeks ago. 
Her well-worn rocking chair sits near the window with the old knit blanket she made over twenty years ago draped over it. It faces the window instead of the inside of the house, which was a habit she always had throughout her life. Maybe as an art teacher, she always felt that whatever was outside was more intriguing than within. 
You run a hand by the sturdy wooden dresser covered in dust and scattered medications, along with all of your mother’s draped headscarves. She liked to change them every day, the pattern of each of them aggressively absurd and somewhat hypnotizing, but it fits for her age–that sort of clothing. Your mother used to have beautiful hair. It was something all her friends had always been jealous of. She made the decision to shave it all off rather than watch as it slowly detangled from her hair from chemo, and she claims to have stashed it away somewhere, but you know that she likely donated it instead.
When you make it to her desk, you see paint splattered over it with a rusted easel holding up a blank canvas. But there were swipes of paint across the palette, as though she were trying to find the perfect blend of colors, but failed before she could put brush to canvas. Beside her little art setup, you see a little sticky note with scribblings on it.
Morning tea
Medications- Gabapentin 600 300
Today is Thursday. Oct 16th
800 432 5555 call Dr Johnson 
Turn off the stove
At the very bottom:
- daughter. Nurse. She loves you
You suck a deep breath in, releasing it slowly.
This was an impossible task.
To stuff all of this away into boxes. 
All of this life.
You slowly peel the sticky note off the desk, folding it neatly before placing it into your pocket. Then you start with the canvas, the easel, the paint. Exactly as is, without cleaning anything at all, you stache them away into boxes. You wanted to preserve what you could, even if it was all for show.
By the time you finish cleaning out her desk, you feel winded from emotions. You decide to take a break and try to clean whatever was upstairs instead. Before you leave the room, you see another sticky note written behind the door.
remember ! wear your sweater, it’s cold today
And that’s when you start crying. 
.
.
.
•┈┈┈••✦☽✦••┈┈┈•
”Hey,” you say as you walk back into Gojo’s house in the early afternoon, holding up a digital camera that you found in the attic in your hand. “The upstairs of my house is cleaned out now, and I’m almost done with the downstairs part…just waiting on finishing one room. Can we start taking photos to put the listing up online?”
Gojo glances up at you from where he’s stood in the kitchen, tugging at his sleeves, and you just now notice he’s dressed up in a dark navy suit with a white shirt underneath. No tie. “Uhh yeah I can help you with it, I’ve just gotta go run a few errands and then we can do it when I get back?” He ruffles his hair a bit and you see that it’s slightly damp like he just took a shower.
“What errands?”
“Gas, amazon return, Costco. Maybe get a donut if I’m feeling like being a bad boy.”
“Ew. Also, why don’t you get gas at Costco?”
“It’s a little cheaper at Sam’s Club.”
You gasp. “You have a Sam’s Club membership??”
“Yes.”
“You’re a traitor.”
He rolls his eyes as he pushes his shoulders back to get better settled into his suit jacket. “I have a Costco membership too.” 
“Can I come?”
“What? For–...for the errands?”
“Yes.”
He blinks at you from the other side of the island, brow furrowing slightly. “Uh. Sure?”
You know it sounds silly to say, but not having to take care of someone twenty-four-seven has left you with little to no sense of purpose, and an even more intense feeling of loneliness. And as much as Gojo gets on your nerves from time to time, you’ve noticed that you’ve been…craving his presence lately. Or maybe a presence might be more accurate than any one specific person, but you can comfortably admit it to yourself that you’re a somewhat codependent person that enjoys being largely implemented into someone’s life. You’ve even started borderline nesting in his home. You bought two new fluffy throw blankets for his couch, set up a bowl of fruits at the center of the kitchen island, and stocked up on laundry detergent, even though he already had two backup boxes. It was driving you crazy. This feeling of having too much free time and personal space than what you knew what to do with.
And it had been a while since you went to Costco. The holy land for all adults. 
“Can I get this? Ohhhh what about this? Can we get this too? Wait. Wait. Brown sugar boba mochi?!” You hold the packet up into the air as if it were baby Simba in the Lion King, and then you turn to Gojo, clutching the bag to your chest. “Please?”
He exhales, leaning over the handle of the shopping cart and levels his gaze with you. “...no.”
You sulk your shoulders and sigh as you put it back.
He begins to push the cart down the aisle again. “You do realize that you have disposable income too, right?”
You trail after him. “No. I don’t. I’m in six figures of debt.”
He nods. “Fair.” And then he grabs a stray bag of brown sugar boba abandoned on top of the instant rice boxes then places it into the cart. 
You watch as Gojo makes his rounds around Costco, very diligently aligning all the items in his shopping cart and assessing the quality of each thing he crosses off his list before deeming it worthy of purchase. Much different than your usual Costco run, which involves a lot of chaos and sweat. And he feels very husband material like this. Breaking no sweat to put the garden fertilizer in the cart shelf meanwhile you would’ve pulled your back out trying to do the same if you were on your own.
As you two make your way through the store, you get stopped by the post-office man, and then the local judge, and then the elderly couple that runs the church's weekly Bingo nights. All greeting you politely with a quick exchange of words and usually a sweet regard for your mother’s health before passing on by. You keep having to introduce Gojo as your husband, and many of them already know who he is, despite the fact that he’s only lived here for a year, which royally pisses you off to great extents, but he’s a social whore so it makes sense. And then all of them coo sweet things like wow, what a beautiful couple and you’re so lucky to have each other and my oh my he’s very handsome and at this point you would pay someone twenty bucks to say something like well she’s a looker! good for you! to Gojo because you’re sick of him always getting the ego boosts. When asked where you guys went for your honeymoon, you both say “Greece–” “Maldives–” at the same time in typical unrehearsed fashion. One of the town locals even asks when the two of you are going to have a baby, and you almost snort your free sample of San Pellegrino out your nose.
Perhaps the only thing that keeps a little pep in your step is the fact that everyone greets you first before they catch the familiar sight of Gojo too. It’s a small thing to celebrate, but when you’ve lived in the same town your whole life, it becomes somewhat of a prideful and wholesome thing when the town librarian, local mechanic, and farmer’s market lady all stop you in your lovely little Costco stroll. It was all in a day’s work.
“Jeez, you’re hella famous, y/n,” Gojo says as he continues to push the cart down the aisle after you just got done catching up with the volunteer Fire Chief.
You toss your hair over your shoulder at him. “Yes. I am somewhat of a princess in this town.”
“Does that make me your prince?”
“No. You’re my filthy peasant.”
“Alright…I like where this is going…”
“Get your nasty degradation kink away from me, you perv. This is Costco. It’s the holy house of God.”
Once you two make it to the wine section, you stare at bottles of dessert wines and hear Gojo talking on the phone off to the side.
“Hey, Sana. I’m at Costco right now. Do you guys need anything? I already got Juno’s muffins,” he says into his phone as he places two containers of blueberry muffins into the cart. You eye the raspberry cream cheese strudels. “Huh? Cornstarch?....If I tried to look for cornstarch at Costco, I’d be here for three hours.”
“Satoru,” you say to him once he gets off the call, tugging at his sleeve, “could we get those Haagen Daz ice cream bars? They’re so good.”
“No,” he says, pushing the cart down the chip aisle before he grabs a bag of tortilla chips. “We can’t get anything that needs to be frozen or refrigerated. I’ve gotta go prep a house that’s in the area since we’re out this far. I’ve got an evening showing.”
“What?!” you exasperate, “I thought we were just going home after this!”
“I never said that.”
“I can’t believe this. I had been dreaming of grabbing those ice cream bars since you mentioned the word Costco back at home. You could’ve brought your little cooler thing that you keep in the garage.”
“Well, I didn’t know that you wanted to come with me,” he says. “My original grocery list had seven non-perishable items on it.” You both glance at the cart, which was almost entirely full of things that you put in there. Things that nobody ever needs. Like a bladeless desk fan and an electric wine opener.
“Ah,” you say.
He smiles, leaning over the cart handle again and pushing it forward again away from the chilly air of the cooler section. “Retail therapy?”
You pout a little. “I haven’t had the chance in years.” You glance at the cart as he pushes it. “I should probably take it all out now.”
“It’s fine,” he says, “I’ll get you your bladeless fan. And whatever the fuck those other things are.”
You stop walking, blinking blankly at his back as he continues to wordlessly push the cart forward. There’s about a five second delay before you finally start trailing after him.
By the time Gojo finishes loading everything into the trunk of his car as you merely stand by for emotional support, and then he comes back from the long trek of returning the cart, you’re absolutely winded. You’re not sure why, because again, you haven’t really done much all day. But God damn, you forgot how exhausting it is to be a regular functioning member of society that contributes to the economy on the weekends (you didn’t pay for anything).
Gojo wordlessly takes off from the Costco parking lot and just when you think he’s going to get back onto the freeway to get to this house of his that he needs to prep, he jumps into the parking lot of a small shopping area before he parks his car in front of a smaller grocery store. 
You give him a puzzled look.
“Hold on,” he says before clicking his seatbelt off, “gotta go get that cornstarch.”
“Wait—” you say, reaching out to grab him by the sleeve of his suit jacket as the most intense sensation of FOMO you’ve ever felt in your life overtakes all of your senses. “I’ll come with.”
He quirks a brow at you. You’re not surprised at his confusion. After all, you’ve been acting like some drug addict in withdrawal of social proximity to him all day long. But you’re at least glad he doesn’t express any further bewilderment and allows you to follow him inside the store like a duckling.
As Gojo veers off in the direction of likely corn starchiness, in a confident manner that would suggest he’s been to this store many times before, you meander about the aisles at your leisure. You get lost in the bustling colors of produce stacked neatly on top of one another, such that they could rival the great pyramids of Egypt. Not to mention, processed foods lining the wall right next to it. This was what suburban life is all about. Matter of fact, this is what dreams are made of. 
“y/n?”
Oh, fuck. That voice is definitely not what dreams are made of.
The opposite, actually.
Nightmares.
You hear that voice in your nightmares.
You turn on your heel to find none other than your ex boyfriend, he who shall not be named (Choso Kamo), standing right behind you as he holds a grapefruit in his hand, blinking at you dumbly with surprise apparent on his face. 
“Wh—” you briefly stutter before the automatic scowl settles onto your face. “What the fuck are you doing here?”
“I’m buying fruit.”
“For what?”
“What do you mean, for what? To eat, obviously.”
“I don’t know. I’m not convinced you wouldn’t try to fuck that grapefruit. Given you have low standards for what you stick your dick inside of.”
“Uh?…I’ve stuck my dick inside of you plenty of t—”
“Shut it!!!” you yell at him, then turn away with a wince on your face. “I didn’t think it through before I said it.”
“As usual?”
“You’re being a jerk. You know who I meant when I said that.”
“Okay. So, you don’t think things through before you say them. And I continue to deflect said things. Let me know when anything’s changed between us, y/n.”
You cross your arms at him menacingly and unwaveringly glare at him as a meek mother pushes her young son by the shoulders away from the two simmering adults having their savory conversation within the produce aisle. You’re about the snark out another comment but then the automatic water sprayers interrupt your flow. And also a scrawny employee drops a giant box of eggplant onto the ground before placing them onto the produce shelf.
“What are you doing on this side of town? You’re never out here,” Choso says as he sets the grapefruit back onto the stack.
“I don’t know. What are you doing here?”
“This is my new go-to grocery store.”
“Why not go to the Trader Joe’s that we always used to go to? It’s way closer to you.”
His shoulders sulk slightly at that.
Oh.
Oh.
So, he’s been driving an extra thirty minutes each weekend to go grocery shopping on the other end of town,
Just so he doesn’t have to run into you anymore.
“Look…y/n,” he starts, “it’s not that I don’t want to see you—”
“Choso—”
“It’s just that you accuse me of fucking inanimate objects everytime I do see you.”
“I literally do not care if you do or don’t want to see me.”
He narrows his eyes at you, his gaze flitting downwards to your crossed arms, something catching his eye.
You glance down at yourself, and you catch the glimmer of diamond underneath bright fluorescent light.
“Oh come on,” Choso grumbles, “don’t tell me you actually wear that thing twenty-four-seven.”
“I’m a married woman, Choso. It’s what married women do.”
He clenches his jaw at that, tense enough to cause a vein strain in his neck, his brows narrowing into contempt, but just before he can say anything else, an arm wraps around your waist and you’re being pulled back into a broad chest.
“She’s pretty, huh?” you hear Gojo say and you blink up at him with your chin tilted towards the ceiling, and you yelp as he possessively pulls you in closer to him as he establishes jarring eye contact with Choso with that same old easy grin on his face. “Thank god I’m the one married to her.”
Choso almost blows a fuse at that. “I know she’s pretty,” he says through gritted teeth, “for six years, I was the one that got to f—”
“Ahh!!! Sale on tomatoes!!!” you interrupt the crass and ridiculously toxic masculine energy in the air as you wiggle out of Gojo’s grip then run over to the pristinely stacked romano tomatoes, picking some of them up and holding them like precious commodities. “Maybe we can make some tomato soup with grilled cheese tonight, honey???” you say with a forced smile towards Gojo as you now hold fifteen tomatoes in your arms, a couple of them falling to the floor with a bounce as they roll away.
“HEY!! LADY!!” the scrawny eggplant stacking employee from earlier yells out at you. Some late teens kid with acne speckled across his face and shaggy brown hair scattered over his forehead, somewhat slick with either gel or grease. “I just set those up!!! YOU SQUASH ‘EM, YOU BUY ‘EM.”
“Sorry,” you squeak out, putting the tomatoes back onto the display somewhat haphazardly before grabbing Gojo’s arm and tugging him towards the exit. “Let’s get out of here, please.”
“Huh? I’ve still gotta pay for the cornstarch though,” Gojo says, hardly budging despite your best efforts to womanhandle him.
“No time for that, we leave now. They don’t have cameras here, anyway. I already checked.” You continue to tug on his arm, your body leaning at an almost forty-five degree angle towards the exit as you struggle to get some drag to his feet, but again, he doesn’t budge.
You don’t know exactly why you so adamantly want to restrict Gojo from interacting with Choso, but maybe a part of it was embarrassment. You didn’t want Gojo to find out what Choso did to you and what an absolute fool he had made out of you. It would hurt your pride.
“Isn’t this guy a cop?” Gojo asks as he points his thumb towards Choso. “And you’re telling me to shoplift in front of him?”
“Can you just be on my fucking side for one second?” you grit at him, yanking on his sleeve so hard you almost tear the cuffs out of the holes, and he finally sighs before relenting into a gait towards your general direction.
As you hug Gojo’s arm tightly to keep his momentum towards you, you walk backwards and send Choso a nasty glare. His eyes are wide, studying you and Gojo together as you get further and further away from him. And for a brief, brief, brief, ever-so-slight fleeting moment of love and familiarity and the sight of his dark hair curling at the nape of his neck and the memory of warmth when he used to hold you in his arms in bed on cold winter mornings, you find that you miss him a little. But only a little. You swear that it’s only a little.
Gojo still makes a pit stop at the register much to your pleading dismay, but as always he has zero regard or interest for your melodramatic outbursts, but at least he shoves the extra change from the purchase into his pocket in a somewhat timely fashion so that you two can head out the door in your artificial haste.
In the car, you quickly click your seatbelt on and then have to watch Gojo as he takes his time clicking his back into place and enter some address into his car. You see the ETA on the GPS, and how it shows that this address is roughly thirty-four minutes away.
Once he gets onto the freeway, your mind begins to wander back to seeing Choso at the grocery store and how the sight of him rattled you. You twiddle with your thumbs in your lap nervously, shift around in your seat, chew at the edge of your nail, and Gojo seems to notice this.
“You know, having lived in this town your whole life, I would think you’d be used to the discomfort of running into people you don’t want to see,” he says.
You sigh. “Yes. In theory. But with Choso, it’s–…it’s different.” You hesitate.  “It’s just that—” you try again before worrying your bottom lip between your teeth, “it’s just that, sometimes I don’t get him.”
Gojo is silent for a few seconds as he stares straight towards the road before he responds with, “What do you mean?”
“Like, he avoids me like the plague, and then begs me to go back to him, and then he pretends like I’m just a nuisance to him, and then when he sees me with you, he acts all—…I don’t know…all—”
“Jealous?”
You sink into your seat. “Something like that.”
“Hm. Yeah, to be honest, I don’t know. But you’re not wrong to find it strange.”
Feeling strangely validated in your feelings, you sit there twiddling with your thumbs and then glance out the window. There’s a silence that lasts maybe ten seconds before you say,
“Thanks for interrupting back there. Although, you don’t have to try to deliberately make him jealous anymore. Even though I know I literally asked you to do that. Which makes me a woman of severe psychiatric ailment. Of which I am slightly embarrassed about at the moment.”
“Nah,” he says as he turns the right onto the freeway entrance. When you look over at him, he has a smile on his face. “I like it. It’s never boring with you.”
Unsure if that’s a compliment or some shade of insult, you say, “and that’s a good thing?”
He shrugs, releasing one hand from the wheel and curling the other in a tight knuckled grip at the top of it as the car drives steady down the freeway. He rests his right elbow on the storage console. “Well, it’s different from what I’m used to.”
What are you used to? You so badly want to ask him.
But a flashback to his childhood bedroom at his parent’s house comes back to you.
Yearbook signatures, trophies, and photos abandoned underneath a bed.
You almost don’t even want to acknowledge that he has lived a life before you.
Was that self centered? Or perhaps childish? Or perhaps all in human nature?
You decide not to respond, instead directing your attention to the world outside the car window. The blades of grass dance across the shoulder of the road, all greenery following suit in the same swift motion. You watch as the land slowly turns from developed to more and more remote, yet still cozy and charming. Fields of green, vineyard arrangements, a wooden sign for a winery, a picturesque red barn house, a small cattle farm, an old town church with a bronze bell, hills of empty acres that are just begging to be touched by some great idea or civilization.
You’re privy to change in texture underneath the wheels as Gojo makes a turn onto gravel road about two miles after getting off the freeway. He drives up a hill, maybe a forty-five degree angle, with the crunch of rocks rubbing against the tread of the tires and you see a more distinct, purposeful arrangement of short decorative trees that line the properties of this narrow gravel road. They were large houses, sitting on slightly slanted hills that were all a part of a bumpy landscape that extends for miles. Some had formal fences, some had chain links, but all had expansive yards with no clear distinction of boundary, where the backyard could be the front yard too if only you had the imagination for it.
One house in particular catches your eye. It’s a pretty two story house with a detached garage or perhaps shed, painted in a dusky auburn with dark wooden paneling and structure. It sat near the top of this hill, the front yard being a steep upwards slope of grassy terrain that stretched for the full length of the property, about a hundred yards. The backyard dips behind the back of the hill, downwards into some territory you cannot set eyes on. But it’s stunning. It was gorgeous. Serene. With views of lush green surrounding its every corner. Intimately located, yet open enough to fresh air in which you almost feel one with the world. And in the early evening light, it looked like heaven.
You let out a slow exhale as you take in the sight that looks like a painting to you. There was something so romantic about a home. For as long as time, humans have enjoyed personifying objects, such as boats or planes or cars or  trains. But what could feel more of a living thing than a home?
You hear Gojo click his seatbelt off beside you and you glance over at him. You click off your own seat belt and open your door, stepping out onto the gravel road.
Gojo comes around the car and approaches you, holding a folder in his hand with papers you can only assume have information on the property listing. You also hear the jingle of keys in his pocket as he pushes his hand into it. 
“Got about,” he glances at his watch, “twenty minutes to prep. Oh, and if my clients ask, I’ll just introduce you as my assistant. And we’ll pretend that we have some sort of inappropriate workplace relationship. Just to intrigue them. It’ll make the house more memorable. Sound like a plan?”
You roll your eyes. “Whatever gets food on your table.”
You watch as he pushes a copper key into the rusted lock that was clipped onto the chains holding the fence together, guarding the property. He yanks it down once he’s unlocked it and then pulls the fence apart, opening the way to head up the house. It borders on a feeling of trespassing, but you trail closely behind Gojo as he makes his way up the grassy hill, reminding yourself that he has the clearance as a realtor.
You glance around the property a bit more. There’s a small pond in the dip of one of the smaller hills, fuzzy with moss and some small fish you can see snapping at the surface of the water. Off to the right of it, there are similarly moss covered stone benches, small and antique. Perfect to sit there and watch the sun set behind the house. And towards the left, a small gondola with arranged stained glass stepping stones. 
“Charming, huh?” Gojo says over his shoulder at you, and you realize he’s caught you staring at everything in awe.
Gojo makes it to the veranda after lengthy strides across the broad concrete steps that lead to the most stunning hardwood door you’ve ever seen in your life. He turns around to glance at you when he realizes you’re still stuck at the bottom of the steps, digging your heels into the ground underneath you.
“It’s–” you start, looking across the landscape while melancholy washes over you, “...I just can’t believe that someone gets to live here someday.”
He pushes his hands inside of his pant pockets, silent for a few moments. “Is everything alright?”
You look up at him, the question threatening to make the rawness in your throat burn even more. “Yes, I just–” you scoff at yourself a little before turning back to face the little pond, now further in the distance, “I just realized that I’ll probably never be able to afford a house in my life, so I’ll never really know what it’s like to have a realtor show me around a home I could potentially one day call my own. It’s something that sounds so surreal to me.”
There’s a silence that lasts for three seconds, and when you look up at him, his gaze is soft.
“Alright,” he says, jerking his head towards the direction of the door with his hands still lax in his pockets, “let’s take you on a tour of this one, then.”
You blink up at him, heart beating a little faster. “O-...Okay.” And you hop up the stairs to meet him at the top. The fragrance of wild roses and lavender brush past your senses as the leaves sway with the breeze. 
The moment you enter inside, you’re greeted by a faint trace of vanilla lingering in the air. The foyer is warm, inviting, with soft oak floors that creak ever so slightly with each step you two take forward into it, proving the life that it’s lived. To your left, there’s a spacious living room that glows with the golden light of the early evening sun that has started to gently make its descent from high up in the sky. Filtering through sheer curtains, touching your skin from afar, you glance down at your arm and the glow of heaven that’s been imprinted on it. 
Gojo walks further into the living room, pulling the curtains back a bit and then opens one of the windows by pushing up on it. A small draft reaches you as you walk towards him. Off to the right in a corner is a fireplace, the mantle adorned with wilting candles and creased old books.
“Is it wood-burning?” you ask Gojo.
He nods his head. “Can easily convert it to gas if that’s something you’d like better.”
There’s a sense of joy in your chest at the way he continues to play along, pretending as if your opinion truly matters–as if, just for now, you were a serious contender to make this place your home. 
“No,” you say, tracing a finger over the dark wood of the mantle, collecting withered dust. “I like it better like this.”
As he leads you into the kitchen, set your eyes on the marble countertops that meet soft sage cabinetry, the window behind the sink overlooking the rolling landscape of the backyard. You stand on your tiptoes to get a better view of what’s down the hill, and you see a small trickling creek that flows down the valley. Your gaze diverts towards the countertops and you see an elegant collection of mismatched china.
Spinning on your heel, you find Gojo leaning against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest as he watches you inspect every inch. “When were these appliances last updated?” you ask, running your hand across the oven handle.
“About fourteen years ago.”
“Ah, they’re a little old.”
He smiles at you. “So the tolerance for vintage charm ends with kitchen appliances?”
“Charm is cute,” you say, a little cheekily as you move on without him towards the staircase, “but not when the house burns down because of an oven gas leak.”
He hums from behind you as he follows you, and you can hear the smile on his face through the sound alone. “You’re looking out for the right things.”
The staircase, with its dark wood railing and white balusters, curves gently upwards into the second floor. Just like your own home, the third and first steps creak beneath your feet. You always loved the sound, although you know most people attempt to fix such things in a house. For you, it felt like each step had a story, and some were very vocal about never being forgotten. 
The upstairs hallway is lined with more windows, filling the space with the same golden glow that now dances across the soft, tapering wallpaper that has begun to peel around the edges slightly. Your feet wander on their own with a sense of grace that seems to have taken hold of you. 
The first bedroom you stumble across is small, but still enchanting. The bay window has a small reading nook with cushions piled up on the surface, inviting the image of lazy afternoons spent lost in books as the world beyond the glass panes flutters in the wind. The queen-sized bed in the center of the room is minimally dressed and faces an oak dresser that was leaning slightly away from the wall in a crooked fashion. 
The room across from the first bedroom appears to be a study. Floor-to-ceiling bookshelves are bolted to the walls and a vintage writing desk sits by another window where the changing light of day turns the room into a living painting. Your mother crosses your mind. And how much she would’ve loved this window. You could picture her setting up her easel and canvas here, painting away with strokes that could threaten even the beauty of the view outside the window. You think about how much joy that would’ve brought to her. 
In that same trance, you walk down the hall to the end with Gojo following behind you. You push through the set of double doors that lead into the master bedroom. It was spacious, yet intimate, with vaulted ceilings and a four-poster bed draped in airy linen curtains. Sitting across from it is another fireplace surrounded by two picturesque little chairs. One with a square backrest colored a dark burgundy, and the other with an oval backrest colored a pinkish opal. Between the two was a small table that had a stack of a few books. 
The attached en-suite bathroom appears timeless, with a clawfoot tub resting beneath a wide, arched window that offers the view of the rolling hills in their entire glory. The marble vanity has vintage brass fixtures that reflect the soft glow of the chandelier that hangs from the ceiling, one that takes the shape of the roof of the house. 
You hear tapping on the window to your right, and when you glance over there, you see a tree branch bothering the surface due to the wind. 
Your eyes also catch the faint bordering corner of wood beyond the frame of the window.
With wide eyes, you turn to Gojo and point in that general direction. “Is that…?”
“The balcony,” he says, then nods, “it’s connected to this room.”
He leads you out onto the wooden platform, the floorboards warm under your feet from the early evening sun. It stretches out about ten feet and wraps around the entire back end of the house, with easily the most breathtaking vantage point you’ve seen thus far. An entire view of the creek that disappears into the valley, the image of dancing wildflowers on distant rolling hills, the sun that continues to glow in the distance, and a gentle breeze with the faintest hint of salt, as though from a distant ocean. It felt like its own quiet little world. A place where time slows, and you can just be as you are. It was difficult to put into words, but you had never felt more at peace in your entire life.
Gojo leans over the sturdy yet worn railing as he glances down at the grass near the foundation of the house. You come up beside him, loosely curling your hands into a grip around the rusted metal.
You see him turn his face to you in your periphery, but you continue to stay staring ahead.
“So…what do you think? Can you picture yourself living here?” he asks you as a soft brush of breeze passes by. 
“Well–” you start, but then a sobering thought flashes through you, “wait, Satoru, what happened to your clients?”
“Oh, yeah,” he pulls his phone out of his pocket to glance at it, “they texted me about ten minutes ago that they weren’t going to make it.”
“You should’ve told me. We could���ve left.”
“Well, you seemed like you were in some sort of trance while you were looking around. I was scared to interrupt it.”
You breathe in deep and then let out a slow sigh, your shoulders dropping slightly. “Mhm. The house is beautiful. And, yes, I could picture myself living here.” 
More than just that. It was like a dream house. The one that a person would see in fleeting memories right before they pass, as it holds all of their most beloved ones. That ethereal, it was. 
He hums softly. You look over at him and find him blinking slowly. The wind brushes through his hair, ruffling it up gently, to where you could see the blueness in his eyes a little more clearly. That, too, was ethereal. 
“Satoru,” you say.
“Hm?”
“Can I ask you something?”
He continues to stare at the horizon. “Sure.”
“Where did you live before you moved here?”
“New york city,” he easily tells you.
But the answer surprises you. “R-Really?”
“Yeah.”
“For how long?”
“Really long.”
“Mm. You don’t seem like it.”
“Like what? An asshole from the city?”
“Mhm. Just a regular asshole.”
He laughs. You feel the rumble of it from the way your shoulder was pressed up against his arm. 
“Do you ever miss it?” you ask him. But the question was not one that you had thought to say. Rather, it felt as though it was placed on your tongue by someone else.
You feel his shoulders rise slightly with the deep breath he draws in as he leans over the railing a bit more. “I don’t know. It’s hard to say. I still own a place there in downtown Manhattan,” he says, “but I don’t really plan on moving back there ever. So I was thinking of selling it and getting something out here instead.”
“Oh?” you say, “like what? Where?”
“This,” he says, pointing to the wooden panels you two were standing on, “this house.”
You blink, caught between surprise and something deeper. “This house?” you echo, your voice quiet. 
He nods, his fingers tapping lightly against the railing. “Yeah. Although, I still show it to people if they’re interested. It’s been on the market for over three years though.”
You let your gaze drift over the balcony, the way the light softens against the weathered wood, and suddenly, the house doesn’t feel the same. Like it carries more weight somehow. Like it feels more real, more alive. And maybe that’s what makes a house a home–the intent to belong in it. 
"You see that greenery over there?" he asks, his arm stretching out as he highlights an area in the distance with his hand, "aaaaall the way down there?" Now pointing at the creak.
"Mm," you squint, "uh-huh!"
"Believe it or not, those are all avocado trees."
Your eyes widen and then you look at him. "No way."
He smiles. "Yeahhh. Three-point-four acres of 'em. And they're all a part of this lot."
Your smile matches his equally as nerdy one. "Wow I bet you loooove that.”
"I do," he grins, and then gratuitously sighs, "all I can eat guacamole 'til the day I die."
You snort.
"Yeah, anyways, that's why no one wants to buy this house," he says, "guess how much it costs to water them per month.”
"Mm, per month?" you look up to the golden sky, "a few thousand?"
"Try a hundred-and-fifty thousand."
"What–...I beg your finest fucking PARDON?!?!"
He laughs. "Yeah that's usually the reaction I get when I end a tour of this house on that note."
“That’s so insane…what’s the point of buying the house, then?”
"Avocados are hard to grow, they can be finicky, but all the land on this lot is extremely fertile," he says, "and if you can import the produce, it actually ends up being pretty lucrative." He points across to the dip in the hill behind the creak. "You could turn that place over there into some kind of ranch, too. Or a wedding venue, and rent it out. I don't know. The property has a lot of investment value. But the house itself is a bit dated. Would need some work."
"Like a fixer-upper on HGTV,” you offer for the conversation.
"Yeahhh. Something like that."
"Mm," you hum.
"Y’know, I was on HGTV once."
"What?! There's no way."
"Yup. House hunters."
"Bullshit. I would've known. I have seen every single episode since I graduated college."
"Oh, well, this was back when they still had Design Star on. I was like twenty-four or something. Fresh new realtor."
"Oh right. I was still in college then. I forgot that you're ancient."
He gives you an irritated side eye.
"So...will you be fixing up this house?" you ask him. His hobby of woodworking starts to make a little bit more sense.
"Maybe. I don't know if I'm too young to be thinking about retirement yet...but that's kind of what I was thinking of turning it into. A dream retirement home."
"You're definitely not young. Don't worry about that."
He gives you another irritated side eye.
"What happens to your other house, then?" you say. "The one next door."
“Hmm," he muses, "I'll probably stay there another year or so and then rent it out eventually."
"You don't want to settle down there? Raise your kids there?" you blurt out. You immediately wince a little at the forward question, but wasn't that something people thought about when thinking of a house? Do they not imagine filling it with their own hopes and dreams? Do they not picture their spouse sitting on the porch outside, swinging with the wind? Do they not picture their children's laughter down the hallway? 
A shiver runs down your spine. You glance over at Gojo, who continues to stare forward towards the horizon, His brow furrowed ever so slightly as he's deep in thought staring out into the landscape as the golden sun begins to turn purple in the sky, casting a dimming glow on his face.
And you wonder. You briefly wonder what a home must mean to him, after having to witness his parents perish in the flames of the one that housed his childhood. 
"It's a nice house," he finally responds to you, "but a part of me wants to live faaaaar away from everyone and everything someday." A small smile tugs at the corner of his mouth, like he can already tell how contradictory you find that sentiment to be. Mr Grew Up In New York City wants to live in a quaint little cape-cod-esque agriculture farmland property miles away from major civilization? what was it about the city that changed him so much? “Just be at peace, you know. Plant a million more avocado trees out here in the middle of nowhere, and not have to worry about their devilish spawns dropping all over my cute neighbor's herb garden.”
You flutter your eyelids, the comment catching you off guard, before your entire posture softens. "Satoru...it's ok. I'll move my herb garden."
"Oh, you thought I meant you? I was talking about seventy-four year old Barbara to my right."
You sulk your shoulders and roll your eyes, turning away from him to face forward towards the landscape again.
He laughs. "I'm just teasing."
You glance over at him again, and there's that same distant stare he casts over the greenery in the distance. 
"I can't believe your dream in life is to become a farmer," you say.
"Ehhh. It's honest work." he exhales slowly. The sun is now sitting on the hilltop. "It's just a dream, anyways. Just a dream. I'm still allowed to have those, right?" It was asked with genuine curiosity. 
"Why are you asking me for permission?"
His eyes hood ever so slightly, a dip in his expression you can't quite discern. but it's evident in the way his gaze off across the horizon dampens. "Hm. I don't know."
You shiver a little as the evening wind brushes past, and Gojo catches sight of the movement. you mentally curse yourself, because you know that you've just cut this moment short.
"It's cold," he says, "let's get inside."
You try to think of ways to stay here. Ways to lengthen this moment. Ask him for his jacket and make some teasing comment about how he's not a gentleman. Or lie and say that you're not cold at all, that you run warm when you know all your life you've always had cold hands and feet. Or just tell him that you don't want this moment to end. Tell him you want to see the sun through its sunset. Tell him how you never want to step foot off of this house ever again.
"Okay," you whisper. 
And he leads you back inside, down the stairs, and as you stand out on the veranda, at the grassy hills towards his car, you implant this memory in your head, this feeling of standing on this home and dreaming as if it were yours. Before all it becomes is exactly that, 
Only a dream. 
.
.
.
.
.
[end of ch.7, ‘if u wanna get groceries’]
songs of the chapter:  groceries by mallrat  margaret by lana del rey
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a/n. thanks so much for reading! this was a fun chapter to write, especially the house sequence. i think it’s mentioned in the chapter somewhere, but yeah…i just think there’s something so romantic and melancholic about a home :’’) i guess that’s a recurring theme in ihm, with reader’s childhood home holding the memories that her mother has lost of her, and then ihm gojo losing his parents to a destructive house fire, and also him being a realtor, and also reader planning to sell her house, and then the dream house in this chapter. it’s been fun breathing a bit of life into these different settings themselves. ah i also decided i want to include little “song(s) of the chapter” to the end of these! just as something kinda fun to do. i’d say these are songs that inspired me to write certain scenes within the chapter, or songs that i listened to a lot while writing the chapter, or songs i could picture playing during the ending credits if this were a tv show xd. but yeahhh!! also just a way to share music bc i love music lol. 
i was asked by an anon to provide some reference photos for the dream house at the end and i shared some here big thank you to my beta readers mirl, leni, and ayelin for helping me out w parts of this chapter n giving me motivation to write it <33 i appreciate you guys sososo much!! i really attribute a lot of my writing motivation towards them, as i’ve been really busy but been able to write these lengthy chapters bc of their support.  i did kinda rush parts of this chapter just because i wanted to get it out on the weekend, so i apologize if there are errors or mistakes of if anything’s a little confusing or sudden. tbh i did want to spend a tiny bit more time on it but, that’s ok. fuck it we ball also! i just wanted to say a quick thank you to all of my readers and those that have stuck around for so long with me or maybe newer readers who have interacted or become invested w my works recently… i know that i am so slow w updates and sometimes inconsistent w it as well, life just gets so crazy for me and it’s a struggle to find proper time to sit down and write, and i wish soooo badly to put out chapters faster, but yea easier said than done haha. but all of my readers who continue to engage with lil ol’ me even despite all of that really means a lot to me, more than i can say :”) i still face self doubts so often w my writing, i’m halfway convinced i’ll never be satisfied w my craft, but the little interactions i have w everyone really make my day and push me forward to write even when it’s hard and i realized i haven’t really said a proper thank u to u guys for that as of late. plus i know jjk manga has ended and also i took a hiatus n also tumblr has lowkey been fuckin me over on the algorithm too lol etc etc i definitely have noticed i’ve lost some readers n engagement along the way, which i understand is natural n just a part of being a long fic author however daunting that may be, but i just really wanted to say a thank you to those who continue to be here irrespective of all of that. i appreciate everyone who sees value in my works enough to read them, follow up w them, interact w them, share them, like them etc. especially w ihm bc sometimes i feel so bad for the slow burn and the yap haha i’m sure some of you may be privy to the fact by now that this story will be very long and also so much more than just the romance. but…i find confidence from you all to follow my vision and i’m really grateful for that.  very likely that the next chapter is in ihm gojo’s pov :0 very exciting and makes me a lil nervous. for some reason i find his pov somewhat intimidating to write for loool. but hopefully i’ll pull it off.
much love!! there will be a delay in getting this chapter up on ao3 and also adding it to the masterlist etc bc i'll be away from keyboard when this posts from my queue, but everything should be updated by the time i'm back home tonight :) see you all in the next one <3 -ellie
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ezrazone · 3 months ago
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15k has been raised on chuffed!! Have we hit the goal for the evacuation this week?
Yes!!!!! We are in the critical phase of the fundraiser now that evacuation is actually tenable, and the donations that come in now will decide whether or not people check out once they mistakenly believe the family no longer needs support. Our full target is still $40,000 to pay for Manal's life-saving hysterectomy in New Cairo and for the treatment of Mohamed's wounds and Sarah's illness. As of today, though, December 10th 2024 -- by some small miracle -- we have indeed hit our short-term goal and Mohamed is now able to register himself and his two remaining children to join their mother Manal when she is transported to Egypt. This is a tremendous relief and Mohamed shares his gratitude with everyone who has made this possible. Please check out the FAQ I have set up for more details of the Al Manasra family's situation. I am hesitant to count any of our chickens until the family is 1) actually completely registered, since these donations only reach Mohamed $3,500 at a time and 2) actually evacuated! and then 3) that Manal receives the treatment she needs once they safely make it to Egypt. Both the hospital director and the recent delegation from Jordan has agreed that Manal evacuation must happen as quickly as possible due to her deteriorating health, although we are prevented from sharing a concrete date because the occupation controls the crossings and everyone should know by now how the occupation behaves. The irony of this Palestinian family being forced to pay for private hospital services while American taxpayer money funds single-payer healthcare for Israeli citizens as well as the bombs dropped on Gaza cannot be understated. Manal would not be put at the top of the evacuation list unless there was a high likelihood agreed upon by doctors that she can make a full recovery in Egypt. This remains the family's lifeline. Please remember that the last minute holiday gifts market is still open through the 14th! Artist submissions are back open today due popular demand + original offerings selling out. Tap below for the market and the artist submission form if you'd like to offer something! Share with your networks! Tell people they can get amazing stuff from you by donating to the Al Manasra family campaign!
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I've just listed FOUR slots for high-detail traditional portrait commissions of film & television characters! Find me in the marketplace by searching my name or handle. the Al Manasra family is vetted #192 here by El-Shab Hussein and Nablusi.
read more of my posts and comics about the Al Manasra family here.
you can alternatively donate to Mohamed’s still-active GOFUNDME page if you have an issue with Chuffed.
mohamed’s Tumblr page is @save-mohamed-family
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ms-demeanor · 3 months ago
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So there's this stucky fanfic blog (leave me alone, i hate marvel movies and like it when blonde men are bleeding; see also my recent interest in dungeon meshi) that I used to follow that had some major mod drama and basically stopped posting in 2020. I still get it as a recommended blog when I'm scrolling pretty regularly.
Here's what its archive looked like very recently:
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Aaaand here's what its archive looked like starting November 3rd:
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It is a compendium of the most absolutely rancid shitlib takes available and is going to be GENUINELY useful for a research project i'm working on because I periodically see these things float across my dash but I don't follow enough people who engage with these kind of posts to know what's a good source of them.
I only noticed it in the first place because it popped up as a recommended blog with a picture of trump, whereas normally when i see it recommended it's old fic or fanart.
Anyway, I'm torn between which of these two posts I scrolled past at a glance are my favorite. This one agitating about why censorship is good, actually and the government should ban tiktok (if you don't know why it's a bad thing to set a precedent that the US government bans the use of specific app I just can't help you, i'm sorry, even if you think tiktok is bad you shouldn't want the government banning apps) or this one that uses a Bill Maher quote that is explicitly about the hypocrisy of american civic religion to represent a group calling itself "The Christian Left."
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First of all, Bill Maher is, essentially, a conservative and antivaxxer who thinks that Democrats keep losing because they're alienating their base by supporting things like universal healthcare (maher has cheerfully said on his show that he thinks we shouldn't charge taxpayers to make fat people healthy and that the best healthcare is a diet; he has also said a healthy diet is why people don't need vaccines, and you should skip the fast food to avoid getting the flu, and that vaccines cause alzheimers) and cancelling student debt.
Second of all:
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As a very reddit-type atheist myself, I wish more people would remember that Bill Maher is not interested in christian morality, he is interested in pointing out hypocrisy as a cheap gotcha (and is absolutely uninterested in responding when people point out his own hypocrisy - he is a neat demonstration of why there is essentially no utility in pointing out when people's actions don't align with their stated beliefs).
Anyway, it's clear that the mod drama on a decade-old MCU fanblog was justified, thank you, unhinged mod, for the repository of liberal memes, and everyone, please please please accept that bill maher is a huge piece of shit and you don't want him to be the face of your movement.
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themilfking · 1 year ago
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It's the end of the year and I need to make some more charitable donations. Could you suggest a few good organizations?
Hey! Its so nice that you're willing and able to do this. I'll recommend some that I have personally used/donated to: Islamic Relief: I donate to their efforts every year. They're raising for Palestine, Yemen, Philippines, Afghanistan and so much more. I like their level of transparency, especially around the operational issues in getting aid to places like Palestine and how they prepare for such scenarios.
E-sims for Gaza: Israel has cutoff all internet, cellular, and landline services in Gaza. This has made communication in/out of Gaza extremely difficult and so Mirna El-Helbawi decided to set up this amazing program to get e-sims in the hands of journalists and people so they can maintain comms with the outside world. I have personally sent numerous e-sims and suggest Simly's app. Its super easy to use and you can have insight into when the e-sim is activated and used. Note: please read the instructions in the link before purchasing/sending the qr code. SAPA: The Sudanese American Physicians Association directly operates hospitals on the ground in Sudan. They offer essential/life saving healthcare services on the ground as well as an amazing hunger relief program. They're also very transparent and have been operating on the ground since the 90s.
Save the Children, Friends of the Congo, and World Food Program are some other great/trusted charities to donate to.
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kaijutegu · 5 months ago
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How Do You Move A Crocodilian?
In light of a recent post, you may be wondering: just how CAN zoos move crocodilians without hitting them in the face with a shovel? I linked some good examples in the post above, but here's some more. Sometimes with small crocodilians if you want to move them, you can just... pick them up. Gently and carefully, but you can lift some smaller species without causing them much distress. Of course, there's a lot of trust that needs to be built first, but it can be done! Here's Cincinnati moving their Chinese alligators between habitats.
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Great handling here. Two handlers on the gator at all times, pelvic and pectoral girdles supported, easy release into the water. This is a small species so this is safe, and look how relaxed and easy their body language is!
This is another safe way to move a crocodilian- leading them with a target! Obviously you can't pick up a fully grown American alligator very easily, but here's Brevard Zoo showing you how responsive their big boys are to this kind of training.
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Zoos all over the world use different training techniques to work on their crocs. Here's a nice video from St. Augustine Alligator Farm that shows how they work their gharials to participate in their own healthcare:
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Training is really important for human and animal safety. For the animals, it helps them participate in their own healthcare and know what to expect. It also helps mitigate social tensions, lets you see that every animal is getting the right amount of food, lets you easily work with them in and out of the water (you need to see them on land for an accurate body condition assessment), and provides mental and social stimulation for them.
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But also: if your animals trust you and have some training, it protects both you and them in an emergency. When you work with large carnivores like crocodilians, you need to be able to predict the unpredictable, and be prepared for things to go wrong. Part of that preparation is setting the animals up for success. An animal that's scared of you isn't going to cooperate with medical care. It will be difficult to move in case of an emergency, and it will be harder to maintain control during a worst-case scenario.
If you have to evacuate your facility or something, and you need your croc to go into a carrier box, if it is trained to do that, it's not going to add yet another new, terrifying experience to a pile of new and terrifying experiences. Training is how zookeepers protect themselves and the animals, and when you compare this type of thing to more aversive techniques, it should be fairly easy to see why using the right training techniques is important!
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astrosouldivinity · 3 months ago
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𝐏𝐥𝐮𝐭𝐨 𝐢𝐧 𝐀𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐮𝐬: 𝐂𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐬 𝐒𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐲
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- Angela Davis
✫ As we enter the era of Pluto in Aquarius, it’s set to be a karmic time for the elites. The recent assassination of United Healthcare CEO Brian Thompson in New York highlights the escalating tension of this age. This targeted attack serves as a warning that we are approaching a tipping point, one in which solidarity among the proletariat is becoming increasingly essential for survival.
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✫ Since Pluto entered Aquarius on November 19, 2024, revolutions are already beginning worldwide. History has a way of repeating itself; consider the Haitian, American, Industrial, and French Revolutions, alongside the beginnings of the Women’s and Abolitionist movements, all occurring during the Pluto in Aquarius era. Each of these movements was fueled by collective consciousness and the desire for change.
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✫ The American healthcare system is deeply corrupt. With threats from leaders like Trump to cut essential benefits like VA Healthcare only exacerbate the situation. America operates like a business, prioritizing profit over people, and the exploitation of our healthcare system is utterly unethical. Furthermore, research indicates that life expectancy is higher in countries with publicly funded healthcare compared to those without it.
⋆⁑ ⋆ ✩ ⁑ ⋆ ✩ ⁑ ⋆ ✩ ⁑ ⋆ ✩ ⁑ ⋆ ✩ ⁑ ⋆ ✩ ⁑ ⋆ ✩ ⁑ ⋆ ✩ ⁑ ⋆
✫ This alarming reality in the U.S. reflects a broader pattern of instability and discontent around the world. Similarly, we’re witnessing turmoil globally: France's government has collapsed, South Korea has declared martial law, and protests are erupting in Georgia. These events highlight an increasing wave of rebellion, fueled by a collective desire for change and justice worldwide. Citizens everywhere are standing up against oppressive systems, demanding accountability, and striving for a future that prioritizes their needs and rights.
⋆⁑ ⋆ ✩ ⁑ ⋆ ✩ ⁑ ⋆ ✩ ⁑ ⋆ ✩ ⁑ ⋆ ✩ ⁑ ⋆ ✩ ⁑ ⋆ ✩ ⁑ ⋆ ✩ ⁑ ⋆
✫ In the aftermath of Thompson's death, Blue Cross Blue Shield reversed their policy on anesthesia coverage, clearly spooked by the assassination. This swift change demonstrates the power we hold as a collective. The elites may be a small fraction of the population, but this shows that we the people have the strength to demand change. When people have nothing to lose, they become a force to be reckoned with.
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✫ I want to clarify that I am not condoning violence. It’s unfortunate that we've reached this point in the world. Historical cycles tend to repeat, and we are witnessing its echoes. Pluto in Aquarius marks the beginning of a new age of rebellion, revolt, and transformation. Pluto symbolizes destruction and renewal, and the energy of Aquarius fosters the desire to break free from outdated traditions. People are fed up and are demanding change.
𝐒𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐜𝐞𝐬:
• https://www.npr.org/2024/12/05/nx-s1-5217617/blue-cross-blue-shield-anesthesia-anthem
• https://foreignpolicy.com/2024/12/06/georgia-scenarios-protests-russia-eu-election-democracy-tbilisi/
• https://www.newsweek.com/veterans-health-care-cut-department-government-efficiency-1985641
• https://amp.cnn.com/cnn/2024/12/04/us/brian-thompson-united-healthcare-death
• https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9653205/
• https://www.npr.org/2024/12/05/nx-s1-5215788/south-korea-martial-law
• https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cdxz934p56qo.amp
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𝙼𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝
𝚆𝚒𝚌𝚔𝚎𝚍 𝙰𝚗𝚊𝚕𝚢𝚜𝚒𝚜
𝙲𝚊𝚙𝚒𝚝𝚊𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚖
𝙲𝚊𝚙𝚒𝚝𝚊𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚖 𝙿𝚝. 2
𝚡𝚡- 𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚘𝚜𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍𝚒𝚟𝚒𝚗𝚒𝚝𝚢 (𝙺𝚒𝚔𝚒)
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sayruq · 10 months ago
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In January of 2024, Dr. Bara Zuhaili entered Gaza on a two-week medical mission with a U.S.-based organization, Rahma Worldwide. Dr. Zuhaili dedicated most of his time to Shuhada' Al-Aqsa Hospital in Deir Al-Balah, central Gaza. While this was not his first experience in a wartime or crisis setting — he had undertaken medical missions in Syria and was in southern Turkey during the earthquake — it proved to be his most horrific. As a vascular surgeon, he was tasked with assisting Gazan doctors in one of the ugliest tasks of this war: amputations. A generation of amputees has emerged, with over 10 children losing one or more limbs per day, on average, since the beginning of the war. Dr. Ghassan Abu-Sittah called it “the biggest cohort of pediatric amputees in history.” Even this statistic, reported by UNICEF in December of 2023, is now outdated. The true number of men, women, and child amputees remains unknown, with estimates ranging upwards of 10,000 people. It is a number that will continue to rise as new and unknown weapons destroy tissue and bone, crumbling medical infrastructures and scarce supplies force constant life-and-death decisions, while infections and chronic illnesses — largely ignored — silently kill or handicap thousands.
Is this the first time you've worked in a war zone or in a humanitarian crisis? Did any of them prepare you for this? It was not the first time. Unfortunately, I had experience in Syria, working in the underground hospitals in the besieged areas of Aleppo and Idlib. There, the healthcare facilities were also under constant attack by the Syrian regime. But Gaza was unlike anything I had seen before. To start, the supply chain was completely broken. Supplies were extremely limited in Deir Al Balah, where I was based for most of my stay. The hospital functioned at only 5-10% capacity compared to any similar hospital in the Middle East—I'm not even talking about an American hospital. Then, there were the number of patients. Just to give you an idea: Shuhada' Al-Aqsa Hospital in Deir Al Balah is only equipped for 150 patients. Under extreme circumstances, they could maybe stretch to accommodate up to 200 patients. When I arrived, there were 950 patients, in addition to over 20,000 refugees sleeping in the corridors of the hospital and its complex. Every time we experienced a bombardment, we had anywhere from 20 to 60 patients rushing in simultaneously, in addition to the patients already being treated. It was completely overwhelming and overcrowded. The third issue had to do with the type of injuries. I've seen a lot of trauma before — traumatic injuries are not new to me — but the level of trauma I saw was something I've never witnessed in my entire life. When I was in the operating room, I would get a call from the ER saying someone was shot in the leg and they needed me as soon as possible. In my mind, someone shot in the leg with a bullet would have an entry size of about five to six millimeters and an exit wound size of about two centimeters long. That is what I was familiar with. What I saw in Gaza — which I had never seen before — was literally as if an explosion, an RPG, had exploded into the leg. The entry wound would be about five to 10 centimeters wide and the exit wound would be almost 30 centimeters wide. One bullet would destroy a diameter of 10-15 centimeters… all of the muscle, bone, arteries, and nerves were all gone, destroyed.I'm not a military expert, I don't know much about weapons. But I don't know what kind of bullet can cause that much destruction. With a bullet wound in the U.S., I could get away with doing a bypass to salvage the leg. In Gaza, there was nothing anyone could do to salvage the leg. The amount of tissue damage forced me to do amputations almost every single time. 
Can you describe what a single day would look like? As a rule, anytime a bombardment happened, we would wait between four to eight hours before we received any injured people. In Deir Al-Balah, we would see the missile hitting two to three kilometers away and we knew that there were many casualties, but it would take these people — who were only three kilometers away from us — four to eight hours to reach our location. The IOF (Israeli Occupation Forces) prevented any ambulances from entering the scene, and anyone attempting to help or approach would be shot. I had many cases where the ambulance driver would come to me holding two or three kids. They were dead, and he would swear to me they were alive four hours ago. We lost a lot of lives just waiting to reach us in the hospital. Our days typically began around seven in the morning, and even though the night was filled with attacks and bombardments, no casualties would reach us before the morning. By then, we would go to the ER and try to start the triage process: determining who needs to go to the OR first and who could afford to wait. We would then perform surgeries throughout the day, often not finishing until one or two in the morning. Sometimes, if I had time, I would do my rounds to check on the patients, and by late afternoon, we would have more bombardments and injuries coming in until midnight. Usually, by midnight, things slowed down… not because there was no bombardment, but because they couldn't reach us anymore.
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elfven-blog · 2 years ago
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The Better Companion
Summary: You consider getting your bunny a companion, he shows you why it’s not necessary.
Bunny!Leon x F!Reader CW: MDNI, 18+ Only, breeding, p in v, using clothes to masturbate, bunny!leon, eating out, somnophilia Word count: 2.3K Credit: That anon from @lipglossanon thank you for the inspiration
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When hybrids became a popular companion for people, most went for cats and dogs. The kittens and the puppies were adorable with their floppy ears or their soft tails. As a kid you were always jealous, not only could your family not afford a hybrid at the time (especially with adoption not being an option back then) but you simply never had the room for them. It wasn’t all bad, you had a friend who grew up with her two dogs. A Rottweiler and an American Cocker Spaniel sibling pair that Jill’s parents had brought, originally they had just wanted the male Rottweiler, but he wouldn’t leave the girl.
You had spent a lot of time around Jill’s house anyway with your mothers haven being childhood friends, it was a given you would be too. Even now with the both of you fully grown, having moved out of your childhood homes and with jobs the both of you were still the best of friends. The hybrid laws had changed over the years, adoption was more widespread, hybrid children were welcomed in schools, their healthcare had been explored more, they could get jobs, but it was still stunted. While they had more rights the hybrids were still seen as companions more than their own people. More like pets.
But one thing to change for you personally was that you had adopted a hybrid. It wasn’t a dog or a cat like you wanted as a child, you had gone with a bunny. He was a fully grown rabbit that hated being called bunny by anyone other than you, he had the cutest floppy ears and a cotton tail that twitched when he was annoyed. Recently, however, your bunny had been more short-tempered than usual.
On this particular morning before you left for work he had thumped and even bitten, some of the wooden toys you had to buy to keep his teeth down, in half. Normally his tantrums were never so bad, you dreaded what your house would look like when you finished your shift. You had been ranting to Jill for nearly your entire shift, whenever she made her way near the police reception desk for more papers or whatever she needed to do her job.
“He’s a bunny right? Maybe he needs a friend? They’re not meant to be alone, and you’ve picked up extra shifts” oh and now you felt silly, of course he needed a friend. Your mouth dropped open as you thought about Jill’s words. Thanking her as she walked off to her own desk to continue whatever case she was on. You set about scrolling on your computer to look for a companion for your normally sweet bunny. An extra mouth to feed would mean you needed to possible pick up more shifts, but it would be worth it to keep Leon happy.
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You walked through the door after your long shift had finished, not seeing, or hearing the usual noises of Leon as you pulled your coat and shoes off to leave them by the door. With that done you walked further into the house, making your way to the living room and your mouth dropped open in surprise. The tv was playing one of Leon’s favourite shows, which wasn’t unusual, but the area was covered in the various blankets and pillows you had collected over the years. And in the centre on the floor was a small blanket fort, you got on your knees and lifted the blanket slightly.
And there under the fort, swaddled in another blanket and surrounded by your jumpers and hoodies was the blonde bunny. Your heart softened at the gaze as you looked at him, moving further into the small area, Leon was asleep, small snores leaving him as he nuzzled into one of your favourite hoodies. You lay down next to him, hands running through his hair and over his sensitive ears which caused him to roll over and bury his face into your chest instead, letting the hoodie fall from his grasp.
The action caused you to smile down at him, pressing a kiss to his forehead and grabbing one of the blankets from the floor to pull over you both as you settle down on the floor. Your attention is on the tv but as you grab the blanket your hand touches something sticky, and you take a breath of annoyance. You had told Leon before to eat at the table. You glanced down to see what food or drink he had spilt this time, but your eyes go wide, and a squeak leaves you as you look at the sticky white on the colourful blanket.
There was a lot of it. You looked around the small area he had made for himself, realising that quite a few items of yours were covered in dried white marks. God, you really really needed to get him a companion. But first, you peeled him off you and moved out of the den and quickly went to go take a shower. Feeling embarrassed while under the water as the image of your clothes covered in your sweet bunnies cum flashed through your mind. There was a small part of your mind, a dark part that lit up at the idea and slick gathered between your thighs at the idea of Leon sniffing your hoodies while his hips rutted his cock up into his fist.
You reached your hand up and turned the dial on the shower so that cold water ran down your body, stopping the heat in its track to cool you down and wash those thoughts away. He was your bunny; you couldn’t have those dirty thoughts.
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After the shower which took longer than you normally did and finally changing into some comfy clothes you made your way back to the living room, nerves eating away at what you might find. But much to your surprise, the entire thing had been put away. Even the soiled clothing had been put on to wash from what you could hear. And Leon was sat on the sofa like nothing had happened as he smiled up at you innocently.
With this sight your shoulders relaxed, and you moved to sit down on the sofa. Leons mouth pulled down in a frown at how far away you sat, he let out a short hissing sound his head moving under your chin to tell you he wanted attention. You bit your lip feeling a bit awkward as your hand moved up to pet at his hair and ears causing the hissing to ease into a clucking as he became more content and he slowly moved to rest his head on your lap.
As your nails carded against his scalp and he let out that low clucking from the back of his throat, you reached for your phone and pulled up the adoption website you had been browsing at work. Leons attention was pulled to you when you placed the phone in front of his face “Take a look at this for me?” he could hear the slight apprehension in your voice, and he took the phone with suspicion.
You could feel Leon starting to bristle as he looked at the site, his eyes darkening at the sight of all the doe’s he was scrolling past. When he spoke his voice was terse “What is this?” you watched his cottontail twitch in annoyance and heard the grinding of his teeth. Your hand moving to soothe through his hair as you shrugged.
“Rabbits are social…I’ve been working a lot and I just figured you needed a more constant companion. All those doe’s are ready for adoption, and we could go look over the weekend” Before you could even finish your sentence Leon had stood up, thrown your phone onto the sofa next to you and started going walking away “Leon!”
He ignored you as he walked to his room stomping up the stairs as he went, slamming the door behind him and you heard the lock click into place as well. You rubbed at your forehead with a sigh. The rest of the evening was spent with the house in silence before you made your way to bed a little later that night. Making sure to leave him out some food for when he, no doubt, ventured out after he heard your door shut.
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You wake up in a haze, your brow scrunched as you realised how hot you felt. You try to move your legs but there’s a grunt and their pinned down by something heavy. Then you finally notice the hot and wet feeling between your thighs. Your eyes drift down to see blonde hair, tongue lapping at your cunt. Your brain is slow to process what’s happening, but your body reacts immediately, hands curling into his hair as your hips roll up into his mouth.
Leon opens his eyes, almost no blue left in them as his arms move to pin your hips down as he pulls away. His mouth and jaw are dripping in slick “Finally awake little doe? Tasting this juicy pussy for so long, just lay back and let me” you whine still in a daze as he goes back to sucking on your clit, his tongue licking over your pussy lips.
“Why would I need another dumb rabbit? Got the best pussy right here, s’all I need” slick drips out of your fluttering hole at his words, and he drinks it up. His tongue fucking into your needy hole “So greedy, just need to a good doe and let me have my fill”.
Your mind starts to clear as you tug his hair, pulling him further into your pussy with a whine “Shouldn’t do this, s’dirty” Leon groans into your pussy, hands moving to your thighs to pin them down and leave you spread open as he pulls away.
“Not dirty, just what you need. A big strong buck to fill you up” He spits onto your pussy, causing you to whine as he watches it drip down until he’s fucking it into your hole with his tongue and your hips roll up.  He moves to press wet open-mouthed kisses to your sensitive clit as his tongue flicks against it over and over until your back is arching pressing you pussy into his mouth.
“Leon, gonna cum, g’nna make me cum” You’re moaning as you speak, and one of your hands moves to tug his ear. He groans into you clenching hole, lapping at your pussy lips with slow strokes before he’s tongue fucking you again. His hands press your thighs to his head, as you squeeze around him and continuously roll your hips up.
“C’mon pretty doe, cum all over my face, get me messy” His face is pressed into your folds, as he sucks on the sensitive bud. Your hands tighten in a bruising grip as your legs kick and his face is covered in your slick as you cum, coating his jaw and chin as it drips down.
Leon moves up the bed, body pressing against yours to pin you to the bed and you taste yourself on his tongue as he kisses you messily until there’s spit drooling down your chin. His hands move your legs to so he can easily rut his hips up, his cock running through the slick dripping from your folds. Your hands claw at his broad back as Leon presses the fat head of his cock slip into the clenching hole of your warmth.
He sinks slowly into you before pulling back out and then pushing back in. His pace not changing as he buries himself into your pussy. “Gonna look so pretty, all swollen with my kits” His words turn your head to syrup as he fucks into you, and you decide it’s not enough as your hands scratch at his shoulders and your legs wrap around his waist.
Luckily your bunny takes the hint quickly, his hips speeding up until he’s railing you into the bed and his weight is pressing you down. He’s thrusting into you deeper and deeper until you’re sure you can feel the tip of him kiss your cervix. His hand moves between your bodies so he can rub and pinch at your clit while he fucks his cock deep into your pussy.
You choke on a whine, eyes clouded from the sensation of burning pleasure coursing through your body. “Please, Leon. Want it so bad, breed me, please” Your voice is a whisper as you beg him to fuck you full of his seed, and his eyes almost go black from the pleasure your words bring as he rabbits his hips against yours. Wet slapping fills the room from the force of his thrusts that have the bed knocking against the wall.
“God yes, gonna fill you, keep you here on my cock to make sure it takes” His voice is low and wanting as your walls squeeze hard on him, grunts falling from him as he pushes his hips flush with yours. Your orgasm hits with an intense force as you gush around his cock and coat your thighs while it drips onto the sheet. Leon holds you to him as he slows his rhythm down all the while still continuing to push into you, your hole spasms and clenches around him as he circles your clit, your legs shake from the overstimulation.
He stills his hips close to yours, head burying in your neck as he licks at the skin, his cock kicks inside you before he’s filling you with a hot sticky mess. He lays his body against you to keep you there as he gives you a slow gently kiss and his hands move to soothe at your sides and legs. “So so pretty, my pretty doe”.
Maybe you didn’t need to get him a companion after all.
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