#am i loving my own characterisation?
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mochalottie · 4 days ago
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Gimme gimme more
The chapters are getting longer...
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ilovefredjones · 1 year ago
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i wish i had more collected and intellectual thoughts on jim and la’an. instead my brain just screams about them all the time
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spikyiwaizumi · 5 months ago
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realised that I never wrote canon verse iwaoi because there are so many wonderful fics out there that I don’t want to write any. literally so lucky to be able to read what I want to see?? so I’ve got no desire to write another one….
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seiwas · 10 months ago
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omg im scared my tags are gonna get cut out
were he not born to be a hero he must surely be born for this. <- I LOOOOVE THISS my GODD are u KIDDDDINGME i looooove that so much monty :(( how it ties back in to the start!!
and the way!! he uses what he learned on izuku. and izuku really DID burst into a million tears 🥺 poor guy probs needs it THE MOST WAAAH i loooove this lil interaction i am MUSH
and when he realises its different from touching you??? OHHHH. BOYYYYYY.
i love this monty thank u for writing this
STEADY BEGINNINGS ┊ TODOROKI SHOUTO
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tags: GN reader, developing relationship (eventual friends to lovers), touch starved shouto, physical affection (hand holding + long hugs), good god the yearning, obliviousness, jealousy, fluff + angst, pro hero shouto, reader works at hero agency
wc: 3.8K
series masterlist: 2/5
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Shouto was born to be a hero.
It is a sentiment shared by reporters and fans alike. Todoroki Shouto, the pride of Endeavor, the saving grace of his family name. True, his development had been entirely up to chance—no matter the intent or cruel desperation behind his father’s actions, he had to rely on the probability that the next offspring would win the genetic lottery—but low and behold, he did, and to many people that alone was a sign of destiny at work.
Ultimately, he chose to continue the path of being a hero himself, but no higher being put him there. His father did. At the time of his birth Shouto had not been a son, not even a baby. He was a project. A small, shapeless, squirmy thing. Malleable, like any young mind. It’s a miracle he retained any will and individuality.
Sometimes when alone with his thoughts, Shouto would hypothesise on the whys and the hows. The conclusion he always comes to is this: any sort of reality in which Shouto succumbs to his father’s ideals and manipulation would have to be a world in which his mother does not exist.
While his existence was planned, and wanted, he was to be a hero and as such, wasn’t cut from love—that came after. He loved his mother. So much so that when she hurt, he hurt. When she cried, he cried. She taught him what it meant to be gentle, to have hope, to aspire to be his own person. Years spent amongst the country's finest heroes and Shouto still regarded his mother as the bravest woman he knew, strong because she refused to be hardened by her circumstances; soft so that she can’t be broken again.
You are like his mother in that regard. Those same echoes of reassurance that softness isn’t weakness, and it isn’t earned. You’ve been touching him more as of late, as if determined to prove it. Static between brushed fingertips, words expressed by simply pressing your knees together, the weight of your hand on his bicep to garner his attention. The build up is subtle and cumulative and yet each instance strikes him with the magnitude of a thermodynamic explosion.
Nobody bats an eyelid to this shift in physicality, which makes it all the more difficult to determine whether he is reading into things or not. It could be that he’s noticing those small instances only because it’s you, and you are all he can think about lately.
You’ve given him permission to reciprocate. He merely has to ask for more if he wants it. What Shouto hadn’t accounted for is the unbearability of being vulnerable enough to ask. An innocent “can you hug me?” becomes so much more daunting to voice with all that longing crowded up behind it. He can’t help worrying you’ll see right through to the bottom of his desires.
A hand comes into view. Bakugo’s ash-smudged finger and thumb pinch and snap together in front of his face. “Come back to Earth, dumbass. Your thousand yard stare is scarin’ my new assistant”.
Shouto blinks out of his stupor and the blurred vignette surrounding his vision recedes. He glances at the skittish man sitting outside Bakugo’s office currently sending worried glances over his shoulder. “I think he’s more scared that you’re back,” Shouto intones dryly. “Isn’t he the fourth one this year?”
“Not my fault they’re all wimps,” Bakugo huffs. A slap reverberates around the office as he throws down a manila folder onto his desk and drops heavily into his chair. He regards Shouto with suspicion overtop his computer monitor. “Whatever you were just thinkin’ about—stop”.
“You don’t know what I’m thinking about”.
“I know you always manage to make Olympic level leaps in logic,” Bakugo rolls his eyes and tears open the folder. He slides out what Shouto assumes is a debrief and flips it between his fingers. Shouto keeps quiet. He reclines into the couch cushions and returns to reading the incident report on his lap, counting down from ten in the privacy of his mind. Anytime now.
Three, two, one.
“So what is it?” Bakugo asks, trying too hard to sound flippant but landing squarely on irritation. “Spit it out before you give yourself an aneurysm”.
Shouto opens his mouth and closes it again. A wave of hot embarrassment washes over him. He knows Bakugo will do him the kindness of being blunt and honest but it doesn’t make it any less humiliating to admit.
In their younger years Shouto saw something of a kindred spirit in Bakugo. He too did not like touch and aggressively voiced his distaste for it whenever he got the chance—which was often, because divine intervention sought fit to give him the most tactile, handsy friend group possible.
As they got older though, Shouto began to realise that the protests and threats were hollow. Despite being vehemently against affection, Bakugo would allow it anyway, and sometimes even seek it out. The aggression was bravado. Bakugo liked having his friends draped around his shoulders. He liked when Mina kissed his cheek, or Kaminari played with his hair, or Kirishima gathered him into a too-tight hug, or Sero tangled their ankles together on the couch.
Only, for him to comfortably accept it, Bakugo needed to act as though he were doing them a favour by allowing them into his space. And Bakugo’s friends played along without complaint.
From what he’s observed you are also an affectionate person. You are liberal with your warmth and adapt seamlessly to the boundaries of those around you. But you were also visibly uncomfortable whenever people took that affinity for intimacy as an open invitation, and recoiled if they encroached on your own.
Shouto has imagined reaching out only for your body to flinch away from him more times than he can count. It’s a battle staged in his head, ingrown fears. The possibility alone was enough to keep him from reciprocating, set in a state of fawn-like inertia.
“There’s somebody I want to get closer to. A friend,” he begins. Bakugo makes an inquisitive noise, props his cheek against his fist and narrows his eyes as he listens. Shouto retells the story in part, deciding to omit your name, and by the tail-end of it Bakugo’s forehead is deeply creased in dissatisfaction.
“You make all your own problems, Halfie. Y’know that?” he mutters, rubbing at the bridge of his nose and sinking back into his chair. “Fine, you don’t want to make this person uncomfortable, or whatever. If you need a hug so damn badly, why not ask Deku? Not like he’d say no”.
Knowing Bakugo would make his dilemma sound ridiculous is one thing, actually hearing it is another. “How do you know it isn’t about Midoriya,” Shouto returns petulantly.
“It ain’t Izuku or anyone else from your nerd squad,” Bakugo says, dropping his hand to drum on the desk. “I would’ve heard about it”.
“Why?”
“Because you don’t touch people. And that’s fuckin’ fine, yeah? But if you had, I know for a fact any one of them would’ve burst into tears and told everyone in a five mile radius”.
“Oh,” it leaves him a little off-kilter to hear. Shouto leans forward to rest his elbows on his knees, setting the report on the dark wood coffee table. The corner of the page is curled, and the spine is creased, and the ink annotation has smudged under his thumb. He details these things as he deliberates, the excuses cloying in his throat and thick like he might cry too.
Bakugo was right—if he craved close contact so badly, why couldn’t he go to Midoriya? He knows he would likely be met with enthusiasm.
“You don't have to tell me who. I don’t care. But you’re overthinking it,” Bakugo grunts at his lack of response, in a way that very much suggests that he cares. “Go ask. If they say ‘no’ it’s tough shit, but the world isn’t gonna end. From what you’ve told me they wouldn’t say ‘no’ anyway. Dumbass”.
Shouto nods and gives up the pretense of reading the paperwork. He feels coltish as he stands and brushes down his front, straightening the creases.
“You’re right”.
“I know”.
“Thank you, Bakugo,” he says. A small smile unfurls across his anxiety-bitten mouth. “You’re a good friend”.
“Shut up,” Bakugo grumbles. It’s a testament to his concern that he hadn’t cursed Shouto there and then. “Now get out of my office. What are you doing here in the first place? You got your own!”
“Yours gets all the sunlight. And it’s always quiet because nobody comes in here,” Shouto ignores the baleful slit of an eye Bakugo turns on him. “I’m going to take my lunch now”.
“Do what you want,” Bakugo dismisses haughtily, and Shouto smiles while thinking, not for the first time, that he’s very lucky to have friends like these.
The fidgety assistant bows as he exits and turns into the sun-drenched hallway. Warmth drapes around Shouto’s shoulders, lingering at his nape while he descends the dark stairwell where the light doesn’t reach. His boots thud against the linoleum, and he counts each footfall to keep his face neutral as his legs carry him toward your department.
Somewhere between one and one hundred and thirteen, a fraction of Shouto’s courage starts to dwindle. He grits his teeth. A hundred steps can’t be enough to dissuade him after decades of denying himself any kind of indulgence.
The further he goes into the support wing the more elaborate the layout becomes. You’re in research and development, assigned a workshop close to the quirk analysts. Heads turn as Shouto rolls through. Heroes didn’t often make personal visits to this area. If he thinks hard enough he could count a grand number of two past visits and neither of them were for you.
His stride falters when he catches sight of your nameplate. It is fixed to the wall outside your door, polished and gleaming proudly. Shouto traces the characters of your name engraved into steel before raising his hand to knock.
Your voice rings out from inside, “Come in!”
A pitched beeping sound comes from overhead. The workshop doors begin to open in a theatrical fashion, receding like curtains to reveal your space. The floor is mapped out with tape. Clear boundaries drawn between the work benches, the fume cupboards, the vault and your personal office, in an attempt at organised chaos. He might have been more interested in poking around for the first time if he had not felt on the edge of intrusion.
You’re tucked behind your curved desk surrounded by numerous monitors that dwarf your frame. Shouto furtively takes in your cute, rumpled appearance. The upper half of your coveralls have been undone to reveal an undervest, sleeves tied tight around and accentuating your waist.
“Take a seat, I’ll be with you in…” the dull tapping of practiced keystrokes comes to a stop as you notice him in the doorway. The professional veneer disappears. “Shouto?” you say, mostly to yourself. Your gaze slides beyond his shoulder, looking for whoever might be accompanying him. “Is everything okay?”
There’s a worried twist in your mouth that he wants to smudge away. A look in your eyes—a combination of warmth and weight that tugged at his being. Shouto rolls his shoulders, shaking off the tension, and moving deeper into your office. The doors close automatically behind him. “I’m okay,” he assures, taking the seat across from you.
Your expression gentles, and he likes how your gaze follows him. “I was wondering if you wanted to have lunch with me,” he continues. “But if you’re working I can head back”.
“Lunch?” you repeated. Your eyes darted to the corner of the monitor closest to you and promptly widened. “Oh, shit. When did that happen?”
An upswing of fondness catches him like a blow to the chest. His mouth quirks into a smirk. “How long have you been here?”
“Too long. I got lumped with a new project a few days ago and it’s almost done,” the monitors shut off one by one as you sheepishly press each button. Then you gave him a soft, apologetic look, “I’m sorry I’ve been so busy. Must’ve missed me if you came all the way down here”.
Dread shriked through him. The low whirring from the equipment scattered around your workspace is suddenly inordinately loud. Was he that obvious?
You, however, fail to notice Shouto’s anxiety and grab him around the wrist as you pivot the desk. “C’mon. Let’s go before the good stuff is gone,” you tell him.
Shouto had absolutely no clue what the ‘good stuff’ entailed—maybe he should’ve bothered to ask. Atleast it would take his mind off your hand. It’s wrapped around his sleeve, right where the fabric ends, loose enough for him to unshackle from if he wants. When he doesn’t protest the contact you stroke your thumb in an arc over the heel of his hand and squeeze.
Shouto falls into step, too caught up to realise you’ve taken him to the cafeteria. He expects you’ll drop his wrist in the presence of your colleagues, yet you adjust your grip and glance back at him with an encouraging tilt of your head.
“I’m starving. I think I’ll get a rice bowl. Smells pretty good today, don’t you think?”
Shouto hummed his agreement. He felt out of his depth, and he didn’t trust his voice. The spark of giddiness was doing embarrassing things to his throat. The line is mercifully short and before long he has a warm bowl of food held against his front.
“Did you want to sit in here? I can take us to one of the senior staff lounges instead if you want,” you cast a nervous look across the sparse crowd. “I mean, support engineers aren’t really gossiping types but…”
A petty part of him hoped the whispers would escalate. To have your name linked with his, to be known as a person that you cared about—he found that deeply satisfying, for reasons he couldn’t yet put his finger on.
Then again, being alone with you far eclipsed the appeal of flaunting your friendship. “The senior staff lounge sounds best,” he answers after a minute of feigned consideration. You nod, regretfully having dropped his hand, and motion for him to follow once more.
The lounge is a modest room with a kitchenette, a breakfast nook and a few bean bag chairs. It smells faintly like peeled oranges. There are post it notes and blueprints haphazardly stuck to the pinboard, covering an out of date calendar filled out in illegible scrawl. This is no shop awning. There is no rainfall to lend to the ambiance. But you are together in an enclosed space, and that is enough to make his heart beat in anticipation.
You scoot into the breakfast nook. He sits on the same side of the table and tries to subtly spread his knees enough to nudge your thigh. You side-glance in surprise but choose not to mention it. Instead you smile through your first mouthful and ask, “How've things been since I last saw you?”
Achy, like he’s used an atrophied muscle. Lonely, and frustrating beyond words. But he doesn’t say any of that. He digs crescents into his thigh through his pant leg and says, “Boring”.
“Figured that might be the case. I saw the livestream of you fighting Haywire,” you bump your shoulder against his. “The Commission probably dumped a whole load of paperwork on you, huh?”
Shouto wrinkles his nose. He hoped you hadn’t caught that fight. The pursuit of Haywire—an eco terrorist with an electrical quirk—managed to cause an unprecedented amount of damage to the city infrastructure.
“You handled it as best you could. The power grid can be fixed. What’s important is people are alive because of you,” a warm weight covers the fingers restlessly whittling at his pant leg. You pet his hand, “I’m glad you weren’t hurt”.
Guided solely by his impulses, the instant you start to draw back he envelops the top of your hand and sandwiches it between his own. He goes hot and cold all over in quick succession. Boundaries, he reminds himself. But you’re not pulling away. You’re studying him with a knowing gleam in your eye.
Shouto clears his throat. Heat pricks across his skin, concentrated in his cheekbones. “Sorry,” he says. You can ask, a memory echoes. “Is this okay?”
“You don’t have to apologise. I told you it’s fine,” you reply firmly. “I’m happy to remind you if you need to hear it”.
“No, I…” his brow furrows. “I’ve been thinking”.
“That’s not good”.
Shouto snorts and shakes his head, his amusement petering out into a shallow breath. “I want to ask. I’ve wanted to ask like you said I could,” he explains vaguely. “I’m not very good at it, I think”.
You make a soft, understanding sound that immediately sets him at ease. “I guess, after denying yourself something for so long it can be scary to let yourself have it again,” you murmur, a faraway look in your eyes. After a pensive moment the sheen fades and your laughter lines deepen, “I’ll do what I did before, then. If you look like you need a hug I’ll ask you instead”.
“In what way do I ‘look like’ I need a hug?”
“You get this—I don’t know how to explain it,” you gesture vaguely at him. “This blankness about you, but not your normal resting face, I mean you don’t seem all there. I don’t like it. I like it best when you’re happy”.
“Ah,” comes his eloquent response. Shouto drops his gaze to where your hands knot together. Every quark in his body is urging him to get closer, and remain close. “Bakugo thinks I should try to hug Midoriya, too,” he adds, oddly flustered.
“Huh. You talked to Bakugo about—? That’s a surprise. A nice surprise, I mean! Well, Midoriya does give great hugs. It would be good for you to…”
Shouto’s thoughts grow louder and he frowns down at his rice. You’re saying something about physical touch and wellness and friends. Dopamine and serotonin. It barely registers. Two truths are pinging around his skull.
You have hugged Midoriya. Of course you have. You’re friends.
You think he’s great at it.
Why is that so unsettling? Teenagers think like this. Single minded and overly emotional.
He feels the shifting of your knuckles under his palm. “Hey. You’ll need one of these back if you’re going to eat,” you say.
“Right,” he lifts his left hand and picks up his chopsticks to take a pinch of rice from his bowl. He chews until the clamouring in his mind has settled, and you patiently accept his stoic silence without explanation. Shouto hasn’t been this awkward since highschool, and even then he was too wrapped up in his familial problems to be aware of it.
“What’s the project you’ve been working on?” he eventually asks.
You take the change of topic in your stride, leaning closer and lowering your voice to an excited whisper, “I’m not supposed to tell you but—it’s for Deku’s new costume”.
“Midoriya is getting a new costume?” Shouto replies. You playfully shush him and he pouts a little.
“Don’t sulk. He doesn’t know yet either,” you poke a chopstick at the corner of his jutted mouth. “It’s my job to prepare a design portfolio and talk through everything next week. You’ll get a new one too, when you break the top five”.
“If,” he amends.
“You don’t think you’ll move up?”
“Reaching the top was never really a priority for me,” Shouto’s attention splinters, half of his focus on the conversation and the other on the sensation of your skin. He considers overturning his hand to entwine your fingers. “I just want to be the best hero I can be”.
You hum, and as if plucking the desire right from his mind, absentmindedly slip into the gaps between his fingers. Shouto steadies his breathing and takes another mouthful.
The rest of the hour passes, syrupy and slow like molasses. By the final minute Shouto’s palm is sticky and reluctant to part from yours. You usher him out from the breakfast nook first, stacking the empty bowls before directing him back toward the emptied cafeteria.
You slide the bowls along the counter for the kitchen staff to take. Then you wipe your hands down your front as you pivot to face him, thrusting out both arms as he stands frozen.
“Can I hug you?”
Shouto touches his face and you laugh.
“This is because I want one,” you clarify with a warm grin, beckoning him closer.
Shouto inhales steps into the embrace, his arms instinctively wrapping around your back. There are less layers this time—the heat of your body is overwhelming, alongside the gentle rise of goosebumps across your bare shoulders. Your breath fell gently on his collarbone, his head lowering to curl into you. He thinks, were he not born to be a hero, he must surely be born for this.
“Thank you,” you mumble, squeezing his waste a final time as you retreat. “I’ll talk to you later, yeah?”
Shouto nods. Your presence moves away like the sun being blocked out and he watches you go, departing words caught in his teeth, an incessant buzz in his fingertips. The walk back to his office is a gauzy yellow haze. Every physiological response in his body told him that he was in a free fall, despite his feet being firmly on the ground.
“Shouto!”
Shouto halts mid-step at the familiar voice. He turns to look at Izuku, at the tentative beginnings of his smile. “Izuku,” he says.
“We missed you at lunch—are you feeling alright?” Izuku asks, slightly bemused. “You look kinda… floaty,” his eyes are dark, softened in the afternoon light as they sweep over Shouto’s figure and his face.
"Izuku," Shouto said before he could convince himself otherwise, “Do you want a hug?”
The innocent question appeared to crash into Izuku with the levity of a bullet train in motion. Tears sprang to his eyes, brighter now. Shouto tenses as he is swept into a solid hug. Izuku smells like fresh air, sweat and sweet-salty broth. He holds Shouto as though trying to keep his seams from bursting; thick arms are secure around his shoulders, and a rough palm rubs broad strokes down his back, smoothing the tension until Shouto is relaxed.
You were right. Izuku does give great hugs. Shouto came away doughy, and fuller, and with the stark realisation that while touching Izuku soothed the ache, it still felt completely different to touching you.
Later, as he leaned his head against the desk surface, he sluggishly contemplated the implications of that.
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#oh monty this makes me ache for him sooo terribly#i got sooo sad at 'he was a project' bc truly :(((( like a test trial :(( oh im so sad#and this is so powerful omg: any sort of reality in which Shouto succumbs to his father’s ideals and manipulation#would have to be a world in which his mother does not exist. <- :(((( he loves his mama#and i looove the idea of you reminding him of the parts that he loves and admires about his momma#how you view softness as strength and it ISN'T EARNED!!! that's the impt bit. I AM SUUUCH A SUCKER FOR THAT#The build up is subtle and cumulative and yet each instance strikes him with the magnitude of a thermodynamic explosion.#<- SO GOOD DHBGHSF. i also love that you gradually ease him into it#anD WAAAAAHHH THE WAY it shocks no one that youre touchy w him and he's double thinking if its just him bc ure all he can think about latel#An innocent “can you hug me?” becomes so much more daunting to voice with all that longing crowded up behind it <- I WANT TO HUG HIMSDHFBSD#he is sooOOO precious :(( learning how to love and be touched and wanting it just cos he wants it :((#the oLYMPIC LEVEL LEAPS OF LOGIC HAS ME CACKLING HJSBDFJ i looove todobaku dynamics my GOD#AND HOW HE KNOWSSSS BKG IS GONNA ASK HIM TO SPILL IT ANYWAY DSHFBSJD PLS#AND SO TRUE :(( he and bkg are the same !!! in diff ways !! nd he allows the affection to touch him!!! despite all his bark WAAAH#MONTY I LOVE EVERYTHING U WRITE TRULY DHSD THE CHARACTERISATION NAD THE LIL DETAILS I AM JUST !!#AND SHOUTO BEING SCARED OF RECIPROCATING!!! BC OF U REJECTING HIM WAAAAH my precious boy#I CHOKED AT THE DEKU SUGGESTIODNFHSDB and everyone in their group bursting into tears at the thought of shouto's touch WAAAH#theres so much personality to your scenes monty i am forever in awe of it!!!!!! the todobaku dynamic SOARS and bkg's personality shines thr#and im cryING at shouto counting all the steps to you asfbsd he likes how your gaze follows him :(( OHHH IM MELTINGG HE LIKES UUU#WHEN U JOKE ABT HIM MISSING U HGSDFSJA AND HE GOES FULL ON ANXIETY BUT URE LIKE EH ! LETS GO !#IM CRYININGHBDFDS HES SOO CUTE when u grab his wrist and its ALLL he can focus on oh GOD let me HAVE HIM#AND HIM WANTING UR NAME TO BE ATTASCHED TO HIS DFJBS OH im so sick for tht BUT HE'D RATHER BE ALONE WITH U GODDDD#his lil movements tyring to get close to u like spreading his thighs?? OMGFBASFJ thATS SO CUTE#I LOOOOVE the attention to all the small points of touch AND WHEN HE TAKES UR HAND BACK TO SANDWICH IT WITH HIS OWN GOOOD DHJFBSHJ SOMEONE#everything abt this interaction is makigme GO INSANE monty omg. 'i like it best when ure happy' and then HIM OVERTHINKING THE HELLLL#OUT OF YOU HUGGING MIDORIYAF AHSDJFJ IM GOIDHFGJBSL#HIS LITTLE SULKKK SAAAAVE ME and he considers oVERTURNING UR HAND TO INTERTWINE UR FINGERS HELLOADG>>>!>!>>!!?!?!#MOnty i feel like a rabid dog going insane at small touches LIKE. they could breathe around one another and i think i woud die#bnha#sho
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vadlings · 1 year ago
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Represention of Autistic Frustration in Laios Dungeon Meshi
Like many other autistic people, I related strongly to Laios Touden while reading Dungeon Meshi. This post isn't going to spend time disputing whether he displays autistic traits or not—while I could do that, I want to focus on why specifically his portrayal struck a chord with me in a way the writing of most other autistic-coded characters has not.
Disclaimer: as the above suggests, this post is strongly informed by my own experiences as an autistic person, as well as the experiences of my neurodivergent friends with whom I have spoken about this subject. I want to clarify that in no way am I asserting my personal experience to be some Universal Autistic Experience. This post is about why Laios' character feels distinct and significant to me in regard to autistic representation, and while I'm at it, I do feel that I have interesting things to say about autistic representation in media generally. This also got a bit long, so I'm sticking it under a read more. Spoilers for up to the end of chapter 88 below.
The thing that stands out most to me in regard to Laios' characterisation is the open anger he displays when someone points out his inability to read other people. This comes up prominently in his interactions with "Shuro" (Toshiro Nakamoto):
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The frustration pictured above (Laios continuing to physically tussle with Toshiro, using crude language toward him) becomes even more notable when you remember that this is Laios, who, outside of these interactions, is not easily fazed and often exists as a lighthearted contrast to the rest of the cast. Then we get to Laios' nightmare.
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In Falin's words: "Nightmares love emotional wounds. Wounds you hold in your heart. Things that give you stress, or things that were traumatic for you. They aggravate memories like that and cause the dreamer to have terrible dreams." (chapter 42, page 10.) (damn. i'm properly citing for this post and everything.)
Thus, Laios' nightmare establishes an important fact: even if he is unable to recognise social blunders while he's making them, he's at least subconsciously aware that other people operate on a different wavelength to him, and that he's an outsider in many of his social circles (both past and present). His dream-father's disparaging words stress the impact this has had upon his ability to live up to the expectations set out for him, and we also get a panel of kids who smirk at him (presumably former bullies to some degree). Toshiro's appearance only hammers home how much Laios is still both humiliated and angered by his misunderstanding of their relationship.
I've thought a lot about anger as concomitant to the autistic experience. When autistic representation portrays ostracization, it's generally from an angle of the autistic character being upset at how conforming to neurotypical norms doesn't come easily to them; as a result, they express a desire to 'get better' at meeting neurotypical standards, a desire to become more 'normal' (whether the writing implies this is a good thing or not). In contrast, not once does Laios go, "I need to perform better in my social interactions, and try to care less about monsters, because that's what other people find weird." His frustration is directed outward rather than inward, and as a result, it's the people around him who are framed as nonsensical.
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The Winged Lion starts delineating Laios' anger, and Laios' reaction is to think to himself, "It can sense all my thoughts, huh?" (chapter 88, page 16.) This is the scene that really resonated with me. I'm not saying I have never felt the desire to conform to neurotypical norms that is borne from insecurity, but primarily, I know that I don't want to work toward becoming 'normal'—I don't want to change myself for people who follow rules I find nonsensical. It's the difference between, "Oh god, why can't I get it," and, "WHY CAN'T YOU GET IT?" (phrasing here courtesy of my friend Miles @dogwoodbite). And for me personally, Dungeon Meshi is the first time I've seen this frustration and the resultant voluntary isolation from other people portrayed in media so candidly. Laios' anger is not downplayed or written to be easily palatable, either.
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The culmination of Laios' frustrations in this scene wherein we learn that Laios has fantasised about "a pack of monsters attacking a village" drives home just how alienated he really feels. I need not go into his wish to become a monster himself, redolent of how many autistic people identify/have identified with non-humans to some degree as a result of a percieved disconnect from society (when I was younger, I wanted to be a robot. I still kind of do.)
Obviously, wishing death upon other people is a weighty thing, but the unfiltered nature of this page is what deeply resonated with me. The Winged Lion is laying Laios' deepest and most transgressive desires bare, and they are desires that are a product of lifelong ostracization by others (whether intentional or unintentional). This is the brand of anger I'm familiar with, and that my neurodivergent friends express being familiar with, but that I haven't seen portrayed in writing so explicitly before—in fact, it surprised me because most well-meaning autistic representation I've experienced veers toward infantilisation in trying make the autistic character's struggles easy for neurotypicals to sympathise with.
Let's also not neglect the symbolism inherent to Laios' daydream. "A pack of monsters attacking a village". Functionally, monsters are Laios' special interest—he percieves everything first and foremost through his passion for monsters. His daydream of monsters attacking—killing—humans, is fundamentally a daydream of the world he understands (monsters) overthrowing the world that is so illogical to him, that has repeatedly shunned him (other people). I joked to my friends that it's an autistic power fantasy, and it actually sort of is. And in it, his identity is aligned with that of the monsters, while his anger manifests in a palpable dissociation from the rest of humanity. This is one manga page. It's brief. It's also very, very raw to me. I think about it often.
To conclude, I love Laios Dungeon Meshi. This portrayal of open frustration in an autistic character meant a lot to me, and I hope I've sufficiently outlined why. Also, feel free to recommend media with autistic representation in the notes if you've read this far—I would really like to see if there is more of this nature. Thank you for reading. I'm very tired and should probably sleep now.
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garoujo · 1 year ago
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✩ ˛˚ . KAMO CHOSO — choso thinks he may be addicted to the feeling of your fingers in his hair.
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ஜ ˖ ࣪࿐ྂ warnings! f!reader, face sitting, hair pulling (choso’s), pet names, questionable characterisation! ��� ˖ ࣪࿐ྂ note! first time writing for choso so i am v sorry in advance <3
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you hear choso growl from where he’s pressed underneath you, face shoved between your thighs as you grind down into the steady lav of his tongue. his cheeks and the lower half of his face are slick, soaked with your juices as they drip and pool onto the sheets beneath him.
you feel his fingers flex into the flesh of your hips, pulling you deeper— sure to leave a mark everytime your thighs tighten around his head, like he’d gladly take his last breath from between your legs as he groans.
“shit, keep doing that, princess.” you hear your dark haired lover gasp as he breathes deep before he buries himself back into you. but the low tone of choso’s voice still manages to send vibrations straight through your clit, making your hips twitch with the sudden jolt of pleasure as you press yourself down into his mouth.
your fingers tighten in his hair as you ride him, so greedily as your hole clenches around his tongue and he loves the way you pull at the messy hair style, musing it beneath your touch as you pull at the roots. “so good~ fuck!” you throw your head back at how greedily he devours you, like he’s been starved for eternity— pouring his soul between your folds as it burns through you.
“you know what comes next.” choso moans shakily, his words almost lost between his messy movements as you give him a doe-eyed, glassy look. you whimper when he pulls away momentarily, sliding his slender fingers between your folds before he’s spreading you lewdly and diving back in— slurping and smacking at the taste of you that has his cock twitching between his thighs.
if you were to look behind you, you’d see what your taste does to him— what you do to him as pre-cum gathers around his blunt tip. he pays no mind to it, not when he’s got you straddling him face, too focused on feeling you cream around his tongue.
“you’re gonna cum for me, okay?” he feels sticky, the air in the room heavy as he laps at your clit—he’s flushed from his cheeks to his chest and there’s a thin sheen of sweat over his toned torso but he needs more, messier. his palm comes down heavy against your ass as he sends you deeper into him, squeezing roughly at the skin—but it only allows him to push his tongue even further past your folds to dip into your hole, lewd squelches filling the room as he fucks you with the muscle.
choso feels lightheaded at the arousal pooling in his stomach, his cock aching for any sort of friction but he’s just so lost in you instead. wrapping his lips around your clit before sucking it into his mouth, allowing his tongue to roll the sensitive bud so he can feel you jerk in his hold, his large palms rocking you against his mouth as he groans against you once more.
“right there, ‘m gonna—ah!” you jolt slightly but his strong grip keeps you in place, forbidding you from moving as he holds you above him — fingers squeezing into your skin.
“use me—k-keep going.” he almost growls, his words breathless and needy and you feel the coil in your stomach tighten when you look behind you to watch his own hips twitch at the idea of you cumming on his face, paired with the pressure of you grinding down on tongue.
choso’s movements are almost desperate, your skin feels on fire when the pleasure races through you while you hear his own quiet moans against your cunt— lost between smacks and suckling noises. your thighs tremble either side of him and you babble, your clit knocking against his nose with every buck of your hips as you drag yourself along his mouth, your arousal drenching the sheets below you both.
“that’s it, give it to me, princess.”
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© 2023 GAROUJO. please do not copy any of my layouts or writing and translate or repost onto any other sites.
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bitebitekxll · 30 days ago
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Sfw ask:
Genshin men with a sick reader headcanons
Diluc, Kaeya, Kazuha, Ayato, can remove or add if you’d like
What they do when you’re sick
៚ Diluc ✧ Kaeya ✧ Kazuha ✧ Ayato ✧ Childe
Notes: FIRST FIC ASK LETS GOOO!! Also happy holidays everyone <3
For a character I am the least sure about characterising, Ayato’s somehow became the longest?? Fingers crossed I did him justice. Also couldn’t resist spreading my malewife Childe agenda so he’s in this too. Hope you enjoy ~
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𝐃𝐈𝐋𝐔𝐂 ᥫ᭡
Even if Dawn Winery has a whole set staff on hand, he will insist on taking care of you himself; making sure you take your medicine on time, cooking you meals, doing anything he can to ensure your work doesn’t suffer in your absence. The only way to convince him to let Adelinde handle it, is to remind him he can’t hold you if he’s running around. He’s quiet. Not his usual comfortable silence, but one that adds a weighted air to all actions as he stays vigil at your side. Diluc doesn’t like feeling helpless and hates when you’re uncomfortable so you can bet he’ll be extra fussy over you when you’re sick.
(Not to mention vigilant to ensure you don’t get sick in the first place. Going out in the rain? Not without his umbrella you’re not. Venturing into Dragonspine? What a coincidence, he happens to have business there. Yes, really. But, oh it seems they cancelled last minute so now he will of course accompany you. His pyro vision can provide better warmth than whatever few seelies you come across, so it’s only reasonable he tag along.)
You might need to literally thwack him a couple of times to get him to stop being overbearing, but you can guarantee you’ll be taken care of with all your needs attended to.
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𝐊𝐀𝐄𝐘𝐀 ᥫ᭡
He won’t let you lift a finger the whole time you’re recovering. It doesn’t matter if you only have a bit of a cold, he will physically pick you up over his shoulder and drag you away from work/chores/any responsibility. If someone even dares to suggest you do something while unwell— even if you make it clear you can handle it —he will mercilessly cut them down with that little bastard smile of his playing on his lips.
“You can’t possibly be suggesting our dear Y/N take care of that in this condition. After everything they’ve done for us, no one would be selfish enough to deprive them of some well-earned rest, hm?”
This man will convince the whole of Mond that you need to be spoiled when sick. Good luck doing anything without people rushing to help you with that, no no sit down, you should rest, actually why don’t we just call Sir Kaeya, I’m sure I saw him around—
He does make sure not to annoy you too much with his antics, letting you be independent when it seems like you’re reaching your limit (as long as the task isn’t too taxing) and he’ll be sure to keep you company while you’re stuck at his home.
If you do get bored of being inside he’ll take you out, but don’t expect to set a foot on the ground as long as he’s there.
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𝐊𝐀𝐙𝐔𝐇𝐀 ᥫ᭡
Though he’s no physician, Kazuha is excellent at dealing with illness and injuries. He had to take care of his own by himself before joining the Crux, after all. And even now, he’s often sought out by the crew during voyages when someone needs medical attention. His calm and reassuring demeanour only further makes him the perfect candidate to be at your bedside.
After doing whatever he can to ease your symptoms, he lets you rest your head in his lap. Expect to be lulled to sleep by nimble fingers carding through your hair, and the sweet whistling tones of a leaf as Kazuha plays it for you— and you still can’t figure out how he manages to do that. He presses kisses to your forehead, your knuckles, your lips: you can remind him that your illness is contagious, but he’ll just smile and kiss you again softly.
“There is no greater honour, nor privilege I can imagine, than sharing the burdens of the one you love. Don’t fret, my dear. Let me hold the weight of all your troubles, and let me hold you, for as long as you will grant me that pleasure.”
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𝐀𝐘𝐀𝐓𝐎 ᥫ᭡
For a man who is so powerful, so composed in public, he is a complete kid with you. He would mope and whine when you tell him you’re not getting out of bed that day. He’s always so bored when you leave him on his lonesome, and even if he can’t be by your side every second he still loves knowing there’s a chance of running into you around the estate or Inazuma itself. So of course he’ll try to goad you into getting up, wanting the two of you to start the day together.
But he changes his tune the moment he realises you’re truly unwell.
Ayato doesn’t hesitate to wrap you up in his arms for the duration of your illness. It’s not like Diluc where he insists on doing the work himself, he gets the staff to bring you whatever you need according to the doctor, but only so he can dedicate all his time showering you in love and affection. You get even more attention from him while you’re sick than you usually do (a feat that should be impossible). He’s a clingy bastard and is fully prepared to let the commission suffer until you’re better, unwilling to part for even a moment while you’re in this state. (He’s lucky Ayaka and Thoma keep things running in the meantime, but you can bet he’s in for a scolding from his sister when he returns to his duties).
If you don’t like being touched while sick, he’ll just stay by your side and keep you company. But if you give him the okay? Prepare for him to take advantage of you being stuck in bed to love on you ‘til his heart’s content.
“You know… some say the best way to recover from a cold is to pass it to someone else…”
By the time you’re feeling better, the idiot’s gotten himself sick. You can lecture him about being careless all you want, he just gives you a pleased grin as he looks up at you adoringly. Naturally, he never learns his lesson.
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𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐋𝐃𝐄 ᥫ᭡
Will immediately panic when he sees you’re in bad shape. He’s equal parts alarmed and enraged, ready to seek vengeance on your behalf. Once he realises you’re just sick and not recovering from an attack, he’s more in his element. As a Snezhnayan, Childe is no stranger to illness. Young children, especially, are less tolerant to the cold, so he’s had plenty of experience looking after his younger siblings in that regard. He extends the same care to you: keeping a cooled wet towel on your forehead to settle your fever, cleaning your home with a frenzied determination, never allowing dust to settle and irritate your lungs.
Don’t even bother trying to eat yourself, he will feed you while you recline back on the mountain of pillows he fluffed up minutes prior. He makes the warm soup himself, but instead of the usual seafood concoctions he’s known for, it’s a much simpler, pleasant dish.
“My mother’s cure-all recipe; there’s nothing better for when you’re sick! The kids love it. In fact, Teucer’s even faked sick before just so she would make it for him, the little rascal. Try a bite, I promise you’ll be fighting fit in no time!”
Big malewife energy the whole time he’s taking care of you. He’s concerned about your health, of course, but because he’s done this before for his family he doesn’t feel panicked. Instead, he’s all warm smiles and attentive affection, making jokes to cheer you up while he keeps an eye on your condition. If you need anything from him, anything at all, don’t hesitate to ask.
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tongueandtailbutcher · 6 months ago
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Jenny takes a step forward to go help pick up the items now strewn across the footpath, only to just as quickly withdraw upon realising the stranger didn’t need her help. She shifts her stance, trying to play it off; it’s too early for this. Now she just has to hope she can make it through this early morning social interaction without coming across too off putting to the new face in town. After all, she seems nice enough; though of course no one ever turns out who they seem to be, the world has proven this to Jenny time and time again. Needless to say, Jenny isn’t letting her guard down any time soon.
She gazes over at the woman in front of her, subtly looking her up and down in an attempt gain any kind of understanding as to who she had just run into. Jenny hadn’t expected there to be someone else out and about at this hour yet in reality she’s just another woman on her way to work, so nothing out of the ordinary. Or at least that’s what the situation appears to be. So theoretically at least, nothing all too surprising.
Though what does surprise her is the mention of a diner on the edge of town; she has lived in Port Townsend her entire life yet has never heard of this place. But then again, Jenny isn’t exactly the most social of humans; that is to say they she’d choose a meal in at home as opposed to going out every time without fail. Thus, it’s easy enough to just chalk this up to the fact that she hadn’t heard of such a place because she had never gone looking for it. It’s not like she could name every business in Port Townsend after all.
“You do realise how crazy that sounds right? How crazy it would be for me to follow a complete stranger?” she raises her eyebrows. Though as crazy as it is Jenny has to admit that a free cup of coffee sounds pretty damn good right about now. She’s silent for a moment before sighing. Screw it. At this point she had been through crazier.
“But lucky for you, your diner seems to be the only place that’s even close to being open and I am in desperate need of that coffee,” she pauses, the corners of her mouth curving upwards in a small smile for a brief moment. “So if you’re going to kill me at least let me drink the coffee first.”
Just as quickly as the smile had appeared on Jenny’s face it’s replaced with her usual straight faced expression. She gives a small nod in Clara’s direction as if to say “lead the way”.
Upon the sudden realisation she hadn’t introduced herself yet, she quickly adds, “I’m Jenny, by the way. I own and run the butcher shop not far from here.”
Why was she here? Why had her first solo mission in the TARDIS end up being one where she ends up in some spooky, teen comic looking town, having to explain to people how a diner appeared out of nowhere? Good lord, when she gets back to Me after this to catch her up, Me is going to have an absolute field day with this. Clara Oswald, the Doctor’s past companion, not able to keep her nose out of trouble for one minute.
Yes, she was still having to keep up the facade of being a waitress/owner of a seemingly timeless diner that constantly seemed to appear from nowhere, and she was damn glad that she had enough psychic paper to pretend to have permits to run things. To be fair, she did end up hearing a lot of what was what and weird around while serving coffee, but needing a place to rest or rent to pay wasn't an issue for her seeing as the diner was a facade and somehow her TARDIS had realized that in order to seem legit during undercover it would need to make food. The old girl is clever, making food that is good enough but not so good that people will want to keep coming back regularly because she was the only staff and she would not be changing that.
Clara wasn't the Doctor. She wasn't going to be bringing on companions. She didn't even mean to land here--wherever here is--but something was keeping her grounded here. So, she played the waitress role. Went into town at early and late hours to mention a diner that was catered to the early birds and night owls, that people were convinced that it had appeared from no where when in fact it was just a gem hidden in plain sight. Really, it's too easy to convince people what is real with a fake couple fake Google reviews and a TARDIS-generated website.
Tonight, though, she'd spent most of her late hours snooping around town, trying to see if anything was amiss. Well, amiss enough that it would halt the TARDIS from moving, because in all her time as the Doctor's companion, only a few things could keep a TARDIS landed.
Having been so lost in thought, Clara hadn't noticed she was in the direct walking path of another before it was too late. The items that were in her hands (psychic paper, a burner phone, and a couple of old newspapers) were strewn to the ground. Eyes widened as she took in the physique of the individual--had she touched Clara long enough to feel her lack of pulse? Surely not, but she couldn't be too sure. Nothing seemed to have raised alarm bells as the person seemed as frazzled as Clara herself.
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"No, no -- it takes two to tumble, I wasn't watching where I was going and I'm not used to the town just yet." Falling into character, Clara began to pick up her fallen belongings before stuffing them into the messenger back that was slung over her shoulder. She needed to play the part of a small town waitress who... somehow inherited a diner? What is this, a Hallmark Movie? Clara, focus. This is your first interactions with someone interesting and who might be your in to beginning to figure out what the heck made this place so special. "I can't tell which I need more at night, a cuppa tea or coffee. I was rushing to get to my cycle to head into work, the diner just outside of town? Been here for ages, passed down by some estranged family member who married into the family. I'm lucky I got here when I did because it apparently had been forgotten by everyone. Can I -- do you want coffee on the house?" Realizing this was absolutely an outrageous thing to ask a stranger, she added in the words that every woman would want to hear after being requested to go to a second location with a stranger, "I promise, I'm not a murderer. Just a waitress and owner... and absolutely failing at this conversation. Can I blame the different social cues from the UK and here? Or do I just have to say that I have scared away a potential customer? I'm really bad at this communicating with new people thing, what with the diner hours being so whack that I barely get to get out. I'm Clarissa, but everyone just calls me Clara. I'm... very new, as you can tell."
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zeropro · 1 month ago
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since you've already shared your opinion on thundercracker, could you please tell us your thoughts about skywarp? 🙏🙏(btw absolutely love how you draw him❤❤)
haha, hm…I don’t really care much for canon skywarp! sorry! I fell in love with this character while reading starscream fan fiction, I had very little opinion on him at all prior. he wasnt in TFPrime, and Earthspark’s skywarp was completely forgettable. yeah, I think the most ive seen of him in canon is idw1, and haha, he sure is a guy who is in that comic sometimes. he sure does shoot thundercracker for not wanting to genocide a whole city. 
the fun thing with skywarp in fan fiction is his lack of any real canon characterisation means he can really be whatever you need him to be to round out your home brew seeker trine dynamic. most fics write him as the most emotionally open of the three, sorta acts like the glue that keeps starscream and thundercracker from breaking apart, sorta like their kid brother. i like a skywarp that is just a silly little guy who just wants to have a good time and actually cares about his trine and canon skywarp… decidedly is not that XD 
which i guess is fair, skywarp does spend a lot of time getting betrayed by the other seekers in most media. earthspark starscream left skywarp and nova storm behind when attempting to escape GHOST, idw skywarp calls both thundercracker and starscream traitors to their face, cyberverse starscream slorped all the seekers when he absorbed the allspark, and lets not even talk about what skybound starscream did to him while he begged for his life. there never seems to be much love between the seekers in any media, despite them referring to each other as brothers, which is a real shame in my opinion. I havent yet gotten to the part in idw where thundercracker writes a screenplay about starscream and casts skywarp to play starscream, but that does sound like somethjng hilarious to look forward to, as I’m kind of just really wanting to see my boys have a positive canon interaction for once lol. 
apparently skywarp features really prominently in dreamwave, even becoming leader of the decepticons at certain points?? but I don’t plan to read those comics. I did read the wiki tho, and like honestly? good for him uwu
the most consistent character traits for skywarp in pretty much all fanfiction is that he is 1) a prankster and 2) he’s stupid, or is at least thought to be.  turns out both these traits are canon to his character spanning way back to his toy description!
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((also thank you im glad you like how i draw skywarp ngl I think a major factor in why I like skywarp so much is because I really like my design for him, like?? am I allowed to find my own drawrings cute??? he’s so cute omg just look at him! he’s my boy!!! he’s my aaaaaahhh!!!!!!))
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reblogandlikes · 4 months ago
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I'm convinced I'm not the target audience for the acotar series because I just saw someone say that they're rereading it and somehow love Rhysand more...? The first time I can understand the lack of introspection and caught up in the hype, but the second time? Seriously? Do people honestly think as Feyre and the IC does about him and are unable to see past the false persona of "amazingness" when he's a terrible leader and throws his power around to those who rightfully challenge him as a form of intimidation?
Maybe because they know where they story ends, they're now reading everything from a 20/20 romantic lense because they "understand him", but even with this understanding, to me, makes his entire personality even more underwhelming, forced and unnecessary. Oh so powerful, yet barely does anything substantial with it. Then what's the fucking point of you other than to fill a "morally ambitious", super powerful, dark haired quota trying to convey feminism, but not actually?
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And then, when I'm critical, I have to check myself and ask if I'm being bloody pompous, but no. No, I'm not. The love for Rhysand is baffling for the genre he is in, and i think that's one of my main gripes. Dark romance, sure. But not in a series that has the audacity to hammers down "abusive" behaviour on one character but not the other in the books and by fans in online spaces. It's so weird. If you have fae's, let them be viciously so, because they are not human. Their behaviours and customs should be the differences highlighted. That should be the appeal, or am I wrong? Not for the faeness to used to be OK in one moment, but not in the next because it doesn't suit the convience of the plot or may paint your beloved in a bad light. You've then just convoluted your own world, sjm, and takes away character depth.
I'm tempted to say that I've aged out of sjm's storytelling style, but i've witnessed fully grown adults eat this shit up. But age has nothing to do with this, and I'm just honestly at a loss. I feel like an outlier. Like, I'm just not getting the appeal to these favourable characters and get frustrated when things are clearly unjust or misrepresented, yet others swear ones actions and behaviours are perfectly fine yet hate to see it in others. You can't just pick and choose when shit is ok or not, especially when the characters have very similar reasoning behind their actions. Maybe I like shit to be nuanced too much, which would explain why it irks me of being told what to believe in contrary to evidence.
It's ok to like whatever book you want, but just dont lie about the content within or delude tourselfninto believing characterisations that are false because even authors fall victim to their own character bias. *Sigh* So I'mma chill and go tackle the books on my tbr.
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salpho · 7 months ago
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TO CONTINUE
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Something I noticed is a lot of people who hated BATIM love BATDR and a lot of people fond of BATIM dislike BATDR. To me, this seems like a mechanics vs story issue. The actual game mechanics and aesthetic of BATDR disguise the lackluster characters and plot holes. However, BATIM still suffers those same issues.
This is a vague question, but what are your thoughts on BATIM vs BATDR story wise? Is either of them truly better? Or are they just flawed in different ways?
Sorry, this is long, but so are BATIM and BATDR :')
I think you hit the nail on the head in the sense that yes- BATDR has better gameplay and mechanics than BATIM, but BATIM by far has a much more compelling story that was able to capture and keep attention over the course of five chapter releases. And yes, BATIM is not without its flaws, for example it's mainly a walking simulator in terms of actual gameplay- the only thing saving it being the unique ability to suck the player in through the rich, stylistic environments.
In terms of story, here's my take for both of them-
BATIM is more solid overall, there are more connected plot points and there's a thread there to be followed from start to finish. It does suffer from some WTF plothole moments, the biggest one being Alice's 180 degree turn with suddenly using Boris as a killing machine rather than...what I can only assume was a plan to use his ink/body as some kind of reparative agent for the hole in her face (like thicc ink premium idk), or...some kind of spell...? It's honestly not very clear HOW she was going to use him, but bottom line she decided to entirely change her plan off-screen, which could have been remedied with something like a cutscene's worth of explanation, and more of a buildup to Brute Boris. The "reveal" in the haunted house didn't hold that much weight (at least to me,) just because we didn't even get a cookie crumb of a hint that Alice was going to mutilate him and use him as a drone instead of just axe him.
There are other nonsense details like Allison's ominous "I'm no Angel" line, which didn't make sense when Tom was the one to want to leave Henry. It was never explained WHY the Ink Demon walks around with a limp when he can shapeshift into a bigger and faster Beast version of himself (and apparently he was ALSO the hand in the ink river??? I guess???) And can we talk about how the cult Joey started was just never brought up again? Wally talks about how workers were encouraged (or mandated, idk) to put offerings in the break room to "appease the gods." What gods? Was Joey worshiping Bendy like a god? NONE OF THIS IS EXPLAINED EVER and honestly I think Micheal D. and Meatstick just Forgot that Joey was a cult leader in favor of Sammy's cult storyline.
But despite all of the plot holes, we still get a tale of a deteriorating studio, humans being used as literal skeletons for lifelike versions of cartoon characters, themes of life, death, cults, art, and more. Honestly, going deep into the plot of Bendy would take its own post to really do it justice.
I guess the main plot is this: Ex-co-founder of Joey Drew Studios, Henry, is trying to get the fuck home to his wife, learning along the way that through the power of a mysterious ink machine, his ex-business partner decided to coerce and persuade people to Literally Die so he could have the necessary materials to create living versions of his cartoons, thus making "his" characters (and more importantly, Bendy,) a reality. Once Henry does escape, he learns that Joey has sent him through this same hell before, still filled with hatred and spite, just in time for Joey to assumedly "reset" him and send him on a different version of the same journey, as we can guess from the storyboards on display in Joey's apartment. THAT on its own is an intriguing and layered tale, and that's not even including the other details, voices, and faces we run into in BATIM, AND the new info we learn in BATDR.
Now, BATDR...is something I've come to view as a mixed bag.
Story-wise, it weirdly wants to have its cake and eat it to. Henry's story is elaborated on, and part of Audrey's origins are also brought to light. This is helpful information concerning the plot of BATIM...but then we get assblasted with a ton of new characters and lore for a completely new Cycle under the reign of a completely new Random Old Man. I know he's Nathan's son, and he was mentioned in both Illusion and Fade to Black...but those were de-canonized, so it almost doesn't help context-wise...???? So...????
In a lot of ways, BATDR almost acts like it wants to be an AU branching from BATIM rather than a direct sequel, which it was marketed/confirmed as.
I think my biggest problem with BATDR is that some of the main characters are bafflingly like. Mishandled.
I'm gonna have the mildest take on earth and say I didn't like the new Ink Demon. Old design was better and more uncanny by far, the new design looks like Generic Satan or something straight out of Baldur's Gate. He was given a deep, guttural growling voice because....tumblr sexyman I guess. Even if they needed him to talk, it could've been something more breathy and raspy, true to the heavy breathing of the original Ink Demon. Also, his alternate form was made very childlike, and I'm just weirded out by the fact that you have this oddly "sexified" version of the Ink Demon on the flipside of Bendy the Child. I don't think any ill intent was meant by this, but it's more confusing than anything thematically. I'm also not sure why Bendy's abuse was brought up and then never touched on....? Like wasn't this guy locked up and called a monster his whole life? Are we going to...say something especially considering the moral of this story......?
Memory Joey is completely fine, but I just can't shake the feeling that the narrative is trying to paint IRL Joey as "UWU fixed now" when that's not the case. The most sympathy I can extend to IRL Joey is that he was a gay man who desired to have a family at a time when that was not only frowned upon but dangerous, not just socially speaking but in terms of his physical safety. But beyond that, this was a dude who locked people in a building to keep them working, coerced and possibly forced the deaths of many people to get what he wanted (the ink machine was a scientific advancement that could've had AMAZING implications for society but he Did Not Give a Shit about that), and was abusive towards Henry. If we trust the Bendy books, he also gaslit and killed his teenage staff. This motherfucker isn't a patron saint of anything, and even if Memory Joey can learn from IRL Joey's mistakes, IRL Joey was still a shitbag who just happened to raise a daughter.
Which leads me to Audrey. Some of Audrey's tale is explained- she was raised by Joey, forgot Joey was her father, and came to work at Archgate as an animator. Got to know Wilson, who works as a janitor at Archgate, and then he drags her into ink hell because....idk, she's his version of "A Perfect Boris" I guess. Fair enough. However, it's NEVER EXPLAINED how Audrey doesn't remember her father, or WHERE she went to live after his passing, or WHO she lived with. Remember, Joey was as old as a cave painting, so he clearly passed when she was very young. While you could argue she doesn't remember his name because she was little, SURELY she remembers his face or voice, or the fact that she HAD A FATHER??? Like, was there some huge trauma there? (Other than the fact that Joey was her dad?) It makes little sense to me that she would forget so easily. If I had to make a guess (and granted I'm no Mark Twain), I'd wager that Allison probably found Joey dead. Remember that Nathan hadn't talked to Joey in years, and Allison was the one who went out of her way in the first place to visit. At this point, Allison's gonna find a little girl running around by herself, and assumedly her and Thomas would've taken her in. If that's not the case, someone else found Joey dead, at which point Audrey would've possibly lived with Nathan and Tessa, considering how much Nathan cared about Joey. Either party has ties to Archgate. But all of that is just speculation, not confirmed, and even if any of that were true, Audrey makes no mention of it. And I'm sorry, Audrey's backstory makes me want to cry, because it's just NOT THERE and she has the personality of a depressed bucket.
Alice was alright...but she was kind of stupid? Which is like....the antithesis of everything cool about her? Instead of using traps and luring the main character from a distance, she knocks out Audrey (via unspecified drink), plays Diet Jigsaw with Audrey, and then gets pushed off a balcony. She was also a lot more...idk, suave and sultry in speech mannerisms in BATDR, which isn't bad, but her unhinged and clever nature seemed a bit watered down.
I don't really have notes on the rest of the main cast. Sammy was brought back to die immediately, which honestly was fine considering his death track record. We get some mentions of BATIM characters. Wilson and Betty were fine, and even some of the lore explaining how the timelines work made sense.
HOWEVER,
I've already said it a hundred times, but the old cast was shoved to the side for a bunch of new characters we had no time to connect with. A new butcher gang member was added when we still have Miss Twisted as a potential female-role filler (keep in mind the Projectionist is based on Camera Man and Brute Boris was based on The Brute.) The whole "Amok" thing was a REALLY roundabout way to get the Lost Ones to stop attacking Audrey.
Wilson's motivations are mostly consistent and I'd argue somewhat compelling, but I don't understand why he didn't do more to protect Audrey if he was going to need her for the endgame for Shipahoy Dudley? Like what's all this about letting her run around and get killed? Was he just aware that she'd revive?
The main message of BATDR was fine, but it didn't work super well for Audrey's character. She'd already forgotten Joey was her father, and was living in blissful ignorance of that fact until Memory Joey decided to infodump on her right away. Sure, the "just because you were born of darkness doesn't mean you have to be darkness" thing applies to her AFTER she learns Joey was her father, but...Audrey was never threatening to Become Evil, so it almost didn't need to be said and was kind of a flat message...? I would argue Memory Joey would benefit more from that message- as he's a literal copy of a Very Bad Dude. My guy was projecting this whole time.
I do think BATDR was worse story-wise, but I'm not going to sit here and pretend it didn't have certain disadvantages from the start. The Kindlybeast debacle happened, BADTR was trying to continue a story from an existing property, and there was a severe lack of Adrienne Kress. Okay, maybe the last one was a bit much, but still. That doesn't mean I hate BATDR overall, I can appreciate a lot of things about it, but strictly in the story department, it needs soooooo much work and makes me want to jump off a Minecraft cliff.
#AND DONT GET ME STARTED ON THE TOON.#the toon form feels so... strange ? like he feels forced because of fanon toon being real and made of ink often too yknow#and the fact he's practically taken over who bendy is ? is really off for me. like this is a branding thing but god#its like they replaced the actual toon with the cycle version almost. kinda like what they did with the ink demon design#but i digress#batdr's toon form being presented as childish is so off for me too because while yes bendy in the toons was childish#it... it doesnt mean he Is a kid yknow#it isnt stated per se if he is one or not. but like#even if the comics count as noncanon novels. hes very clearly an adult. he holds a martini glass owns a home drives a car#yknow#and. and yeah his traumas are Not explored enough. i guess we get the projection onto audrey of raahhh youre bad like i am but otherwise#joey's memory also. i really do believe and enjoy his story. but i wish they made more of a seperation between the two. like#memory shouldve shown remorse for his original self's past. maybe shown and said to want to be better#maybe fix joey's mistakes too a bit !! have him talk about what hes done to help undo some of his damage or whatever. wouldve been great#characterisation. he is still a seperate person after all even if he is an extension of joey in some strange way#and finally. the character issues. oh lord. i wish so badly they used old characters. it was awfully strange seeing porter be advertised and#he has like... what. 5 or so minutes of screentime ? i feel like EVERY character was underutilised#they shouldve stuck to one or two for each department or company. developed ones preferably. have actual arcs in the audio logs like in bati#m. couldve saved a Lot of the story#i love these games dont get me wrong. i just wish they did them justice !! im yet to rewrite the stories out of love and i really am excited#to see what the future holds. i want to see this franchise and company learn from past errors and become the best version of themselves#thanks for reading if anyone did pffh. i love this game series so much and i love critiques that show it. my own or other's#Nope !! !
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tmntxthings · 9 months ago
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you said your requests are open in your navigation post and i'm absolutely obsessed with your writing !! could you possibly do something with yandere mikey ? whatever you want !! i'm just starving for mikey content and i love the way you characterise him <3
一∑4ÆM。・゜・🐢🧡
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author’s notes: ahhhhh thank you my sweet anon for the kind words, i’m a simple person, you say yandere, and i start writing 😂
warnings: dark au, yandere tendencies, erratic behavior, delusion, threats, intimidation, choking, unedited, angsty
song: 4ÆM by Grimes
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It was late one night. Mikey rarely stayed up past 2 am but here he was, humming to himself as he made the two of you grilled cheeses. It wasn’t 2 but 4 in the morning. Everyone else was in their own respective rooms. You had doubts that Leo and Donnie were asleep. But you could hear Raph’s snores all the way in the kitchen. And Splinter wasn’t exactly a peaceful sleeper either.
“Should I heat up some soup to dip it in?” You offered going to where they kept the cans of microwaveable soup. “Ah sure!” Mikey agreed. As it so happened, the microwave was right above the stove where Mikey was working his magic.
But years of being in each other’s space had you easily crossing the boundary of personal space to get on your tippy toes to press the button that opened up the microwave and placed the bowl of soup inside. You set it for three minutes, clicked start, and then backed away.
The smell of burnt bread filtered through your nose and you looked over to Mikey to see that he was just staring straight ahead. Spatula in hand ready for flipping the cheese sandwiches but not doing anything at all. “…Mike? It’s burnin’” you said plainly.
He blinked, looked down and his blank expression morphed into one of horror. “Oh no no no!” In dismay he flipped to see the charred toast. His teeth clacked as he scooped it once more and went for the trash can.
“Wait wait I’ll eat it! Don’t waste it Angelo!!” You said hurriedly but he just looked at you with a bewildered expression before chunking it. “We’ve got more cheese and bread, I’m not feeding you burnt grilled cheese.” You crossed your arms. “All it needed was a good scraping on the burnt side and it would’ve been fine!”
He shook his head. “Trash!” He said with finality. He got to work whipping up two more. You let it go. And the two of you situated yourself at the kitchen table, soup in between you both as you had your own respective sandwiches. You were starved so you chowed down right away. Blowing out hot air as you burned your tongue in the process.
Mikey had pulled up a YouTube video for the two of you to watch in the meantime. Glancing over at your antics and shaking his head once more but with a smile this time. “Wha?” You said with food still in your mouth. His beak scrunched. And you gave him a wicked grin before opening your mouth fully to show him the mushy half eaten food inside.
“Gross! Why?!” He whined, tearing his eyes away to watch the video he had up. You didn’t have a response for that. Spontaneity you guessed. You hadn’t finished your meal yet but you pushed out of your seat. “Where ya going?” He chirped not looking away from the screen. “Drink!” You stated, bending down as you looked in the fridge to view the options.
“Want something?” You asked. “Nah… actually a Dr. Pepper.” You grabbed one and headed back. Cracking it open you took a sip before sliding it his way. He took a sip without looking away from the screen. You tilted over to see what it was about, some grocery store hijinks. Lame! You got back to the meal. Opening up your own phone to check the messages you had missed.
You hadn’t been on your phone all day! Spending most of it with Mikey doing mundane stuff. Video gaming or watching movies. You smiled down at a specific message.
Unbeknownst to you, Mikey had his eyes on you ever since you had opened up your phone. A blank expression taking over his face once more. “Who’s that.” He said, not a question. But you hardly noticed, your attention enraptured from the slew of messages you were receiving now. Then you halted and your eyes shot up at Mikey, one of his brow bones lifted in question at the shocked look you gave him.
“I never told you!” You said with surprise and turned fully to him. Mikey felt his muscles tighten. Something you hadn’t told him? What could it be? His thoughts spiraled to worse case scenarios. “I met this person… and it was like insta-crush! They’ve just got this way about them. Okay wait wait lemme start from the beginning—“
The muscle by his jaw ticked. A crush. An insta-crush. You were crushing on someone? It was as if by thinking of the worst thing possible it then came true. While you went on distracted by your disgusting puppy love, Mikey sat there not really listening. He watched as you were pulled away from the conversation multiple times by your phone lighting up. And his pupils started to shake.
After the fourth time of you getting all distracted and giggly Mikey rammed his fist down into the table. Smashing bits of it to splinters. “What the hell Mikey?!” You were out of your chair and raising your hands up in what was a mix of emotions. “Heh! Sorryyyyy,” those dead eyes of his crinkled into crescents as he smiled then he shook his fist as if it had hurt.
“Sorry?! What was that?? You smashed the table into dust!” Your eyes were bugging out at the show of strength. “There was a bug!” Mikey lied. You gave him a once over. Then you took a step back. Ah he was such a terrible liar.
“Maybe I should go? It’s getting late. You’re probably tired!” It’s like you were trying to give him an excuse. “But I thought we were having a sleepover?” Mikey whined. Getting up from his chair slowly. You were pedaling backwards. “We can reschedule Angie! Really!” Your voice was half placating, and half fearful.
“Okay okay, you got me!” Mikey held up his hands in a show of surrender and in your confusion you hesitated to escape further. “Huh?” You questioned. “I may have gotten a teensy bit jealous! I had no idea you were crushing on someone!” Mikey explained. Then went further.
“I actually thought.. with how much you’ve been over.. and how well we get along.. I just thought maybe words weren’t needed to describe what we were!”
You blinked slowly. “We’re friends Mikey.” You said plainly. His hands went down, while his head tilted to the side. “Really? Do friends stay up this late together?” You were instantly defensive. “Yes! Donnie, me, and Leo stay up this late all the time!” So Mikey went further.
“Do they share food or the same soda? Do they cross boundaries? Do they text 24/7? Do they say I love you? Do they cuddle? Do they share a bed?” The more he listed the more his face lost control. His eyes widening in a manic sort of way as his hands started to flail about. You flushed at the last bit. “I was perfectly fine on the couch! It was you who had insisted—“
“We. Are. Dating!” He yelled out. His plastron heaving as he struggled to breathe properly. “You like me! And I like you. We aren’t friends. We’ve been dating forever. You don’t have a crush on anyone but me!” He swallowed as his eyes brightened completely into what you could only describe as his ninja stare. You trembled in place as his hands rose from his sides, his ninpo flaring to life as that fiery orange chain snaked into view threatening to shoot towards your form if you dared to bolt.
“Say it.” You couldn’t. It was a lie. It was a delusion. Something Mikey had made up all on his own, something you had no part in. You shook your head. He huffed. “Fine.” The last thing you remember seeing was that chain faster than lightning wrapping around your body, it squeezed you, holding on to every part available. Choking you. And Mikey walking over without a care in the world as your vision swam and turned black.
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wangxianficrecs · 22 days ago
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Rewind 2024 - A few more recs...
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WangxianFicRecs - Rewind 2024
Before the year ends, here are a few more recs of stories of 2024 that found their way into our inbox! I wish you all a Happy New Year and hope, that we can discover lots of fun fanfics next year as well! - Kay
Follower Recs
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Think I've missed the 2024 Rewind follower recs but I've been absolutely loving this story!
WIP Modern Cultivators AU where WWX and LWJ have just agreed to a betrothal contract - for supposedly purely political reasons but in actuality because they fell hard and fast for each other during the prior fic in the series. POV switches between the two of them as they face up to (and increasingly embrace) the concept of being cared for and loved for being exactly who they are. Beautiful writing and brilliant characterisation, every update feels like a treat ☺️ @slothwithwifi
🔒 I'm Much Older Than I Thought I'd Be
by MajorEnglishEsquire (@chuckwinchester)
E, WIP, 81k, Wangxian
Summary: “Now. Before we break for the evening, as the topic has arisen between Lan Xichen and myself, directly, in accordance with an inquiry from the Lans,” Uncle passes him the copy of a draft agreement. “I wonder if you recall your lessons on the cross-clan arrangement of cultivation partnerships.” Picks up after The Further I Go, The Less I Know.
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Hello! I want to submit this fic for Rewind because I love cherry magic AU and lwj pov is so rare. It’s very funny to listen to wwx pining in his head and lwj panicking over it. - Anon
My Heart is Yours to Fill or Burst
by anancites (@ananc1tes)
E, 67k, Wangxian
Summary: On his 30th birthday, Lan Zhan gets struck by a mysterious curse: suddenly he's a mind reader! As much as he dislikes most people talking too much, hearing their unfiltered thoughts is even worse. To top it all off, he learns that his old friend Wei Ying might not be flirting with him just to be a nuisance. He might be flirting with Lan Zhan because he's actually really into him? (a WangXian AU very loosely inspired by Cherry Magic)
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Delightfully hilarious. I read it over a month ago and still laugh sometimes when I think about wwx in this. @alyseofwonderland
Living Art
by relenafanel (@relenafanel)
E, 8k, Wangxian
Summary: Broke artist Wei Wuxian takes a hard look at his finances and shrugs his way into becoming a content creator on OnlyFans. Jiang Cheng sighed. “These columns are negotiable. If you want to keep this subscription, you have to replace something to break even.” Wei Wuxian stared at the spreadsheet. He hummed in thought. “I need to break even.” “Yes.” “In order to keep my OnlyFans subscription I need $65 a month. On OnlyFans.” “No,” Jiang Cheng said quickly. “If I become a content creator and earn $65 a month--” “I am begging you--” “Then I can keep the subscription. Thanks A-Cheng!” The account in question? Hanguang Jun's Reading Livestreams.
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🔒 Only with Time
by adrian_kres (@Bichen-Suibian)
E, WIP, 66k, Wangxian
Summary: Thirteen years ago, Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji were arranged to be married as is tradition. Throughout their thirteen-year-long "courtship," things were not always as they seemed. Now, newly married, old secrets have ripped open wounds they thought were closed, and they must work together to rebuild a trust they never had and a love they always did but couldn't see. Told from alternating points of view between LWJ and WWX with frequent flashbacks to memories of their "courtship". Updates weekly.
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Proud Author Spotlight
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I can't believe I almost forgot to shout-out my own fic that I started this year! It's a modern AU with cultivation where Wei Wuxian loses his hand, gets taken in my Wen Qing and her family, starts a prosthetic start-up and schemes to take down Wen Ruohan from the shadows feat. Wen Yuan having a big sister, Wen Zhuliu redemption and all the Found Family vibes!
Black Sun
by thelastdboy (@thelastdboyy)
E, WIP, 51k, Wangxian
Summary: Within one afternoon, the Yunmeng Jiang Clan became a mere branch of the Wen Clan. They lost their estate, all of their assets, and Wei Wuxian – He lost an arm. All to appease Wen Ruohan. To the Jiangs, the name Wen became a curse to be hissed out between gritted teeth. To Wei Wuxian, the name Wen became something dear after Wen Ning and Wen Qing saved his life and took him in. Years later, Wen Ruohan and his sons have long since died under mysterious circumstances and Wei Wuxian has been branded a traitor to the high society of the cultivation world. Together with the remaining Wens, he turned to the civilian world and revolutionized the medical field by developing prosthetics controlled by spiritual energy. Enter: Lan Wangji. After their fight against the Tulu Xuanwu, his leg never really recovered. Years of countless surgeries and feeling as if he was living inside a gilded cage while being patronized by his family passed, until Lan Wangji finally took his chance and absconded. To Yiling.
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(Please REBLOG as a signal boost for these hard-working authors if you like – or think others might like – these stories.)
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quotidian-oblivion · 4 months ago
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ok. fine. guys. Full disclosure.
I was a superman hater. Like I hated that guy. Big blue boy scout? All noble and never does any wrong? Beefy and handsome all brawn? Gets defeated by any semblance of brains? All of his fights consist of him smashing things around and yelling and grunting?
Nah. Don't like him.
But
But.
MAWS? Yeah no, I've seen like only four episodes and I already am a Superman LOVER is what I am now. Like that is characterization to the best!
LIKE YES! ANIME MAGICAL GIRL SUPERMAN? THAT IS EXACTLY WHO SUPERMAN SHOULD BE. HE IS A MAGICAL ANIME GIRL WITH THE SAME PERSONALITY AND AWKWARDNESS EXCEPT IN WHITE BOY FLAVOR. GIMME. NOM.
Handsome body, but cutie patootie face is exactly what he should look like. And a big damn softie and Good Person is what he should be on the inside and outside. I don't want him mean or confident or ugh Noble. I want him a little bit gullible and a little bit innocent, and I want him to be Confident in a way where he's confident in himself and feels comfortable with himself. And I want him to have a noble heart, not be Noble.
You get me? That is good characterization.
And him being THE most awkward and stuttery little buff cutie guy? Yes. That is exactly who Clark Kent is. Superman is Clark Kent's disguise. Clark Kent should not be Superman's disguise. Because Ma and Pa ain't raise no Superman nah, they raised a son. And Clark Kent is a son. Superman is a sun (to the people of Metropolis and also gets his powers from the sun, didja get the pun? OH MY GOD THAT RHYMED).
AND LOIS LANE?
OH DO NOT EVEN.
THAT IS A WOMAN WRITTEN RIGHT. LIKE YES SHE HAS HUMAN FAULTS WHERE SHE LEARNS TO OVERCOME THEM! YES SHE ISNT GIRLY BUT SHE ISNT COMPLETELY TOMBOY EITHER BUT COMFORTABLE IN HER OWN SKIN! YES SHE GETS EQUALLY FLUSTERED JUST LIKE CLARK AND ISNT ARROGANT OR LOOKING DOWN AT CLARK IN FAVOR OF SUPERMAN! YES SHE IS A STUBBORN LITTLE GAL PAL WHO NEVER GIVES UP BUT ALSO KNOWS WHEN IT IS RIGHT TO DO SO!
AND FUCK YES SHE FIGURED OUT WHO SUPERMAN IS HERSELF BECAUSE SHE IS AN INDEPENDENT AMAZING WOMAN WITH BRAINS!
And don't even get me started on Jimmy. I like that he actually is there and not pushed aside like he always is 😭 Please, I love Jimmy and I love that he and Lois are like besties so far. I really hope nothing bad happens to his friendship with the other two, I can already see him third-wheeling.
Also, I will never shut up about how the best characterisation I've seen of Superman in ages is him being a magic anime girl. He's a special little flower.
ALSO CAN I JUST SAY THAT HOW MA IS THE ONE TO GIVE HIM THE UNDERWEAR ABOVE THE SUIT BECAUSE I SUDDENLY HAVE A DEEP RESPECT FRO THE SHORTS NOW BECAUSE MA MADE IT WITH HER BARE FUCKING HANDS WHICH ARE HARDENED BY THE LOVE AND WORK SHE DOES FOR HER LITTLE BOY.
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fanaticsnail · 13 days ago
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I just reread Vulnerability and it just made my heart freaking melt! Do you think Wire would ever meet someone who made him feel that way? Or what his type would be?
I am so glad you like that one!! I loved writing it so much, simply because I adore Heat. But I digress.
Lets talk about Wire.
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The way I personally characterise Wire is like a black cat on the outside, but once he warms up to you, he is the largest, sloppiest Great Dane with joint pain on the inside.
He wants someone to work a little bit to get his sweet side, but once they've got it, they've got it. All bark, also bite when provoked, but he wants to have those soft moments of comfort in the solace of his quarters with his favourite person.
He is a little bit of a diva: he likes to smell good, and he likes looking good too. He manicures, enjoys massages, facials, and pedicures to match. He likes taking care of himself, but it's exhausting most times and would prefer to be taken care of. He's just so tired, but does it all for the sake of feeling his best.
When he's coupling with an overnight lover, he's rough and dangerous. Yes, they will feel good when he's done with them, but there is no tenderness to his actions. When it's someone he loves, he melts and is an absolute enabler. He acts tough on the outside, especially considering his advanced age in comparison to the rest of his crew, but is the most secret softie.
He's one of the oldest members of the crew, over a decade older than his captain, and thinks he's past the age of indulging romance. He prefers flings simply because it's easier to get up and leave in the morning - knees clicking in protest and all.
Until you.
As a predominantly 'x reader' writer, I think you're his type. Just as you are, he loves you.
When Wire is in love, he tries to fight it. It starts off as small waves of favouritism. Where you sit, he'll be almost right beside you. He has a small amount of possessiveness in his eyes each time someone gets close enough to touch you. Heckles up, as it were. You're your own person, and so is he, but he wants you to be his person as well.
If you are someone who will:
Not mind that he's a little older.
Fight past that crunchy outer layer to get to his gooey centre.
Dote on him and enjoy working out his joint pain.
Be happy with a large size difference.
Allow him to be the bigger person and protect you in battle.
Put up with a few aspects of his 'diva' mentality.
Indulge in joining him on spa days.
Spoil him. Spoil this man. Make a wife out of him.
You're his type. Even if you don't meet this fictitious criteria, I still think you're his type.
The fic I'm writing for Wire right now is with a 'you' who only meets a few of these points, and he still loves you for it. Whatever 'you' you are, he will embrace completely.
Thank you for your ask! This was beautiful to think about, and I hope you enjoy my thoughts on it.
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steelycunt · 2 months ago
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i am quite curious on your opinion on how regulus black is characterized in fandom… completely understandable if you do not want to answer, but since i have my own opinions on the matter i was curious about yours! i love a steelycunt ramble
hi omg yeah! unfortunately for all of us i do have thoughts lol...i already know im about to ramble because ive been dying for an excuse to do this for ages so i think it would easiest to break them down into points but tl;dr or i suppose thesis statement i think the fandom characterisation of him is soooo awful lol. terrible 0/10. i do not even massively care about him as a character other than as background for his brother but since he is pretty unavoidable ive been driven to develop opinions.
he was a willing fascist stop pretending he wasnt its LAME
so many colourful ways people have conveniently sidestepped his fascism to uwufiy them, all of which i find extremely lame and pointless considering we know virtually nothing of the guy other than that he was a fascist and then had second thoughts. which actually could be really interesting if you just accepted that rather than bending over backwards to create these alternative (and so much more BORING) narratives where his being a DE isn't his fault or he was forced or whatever. we know that wasnt true he was a fascist because he chose to be a fascist and he held the views of a fascist. the moral purification and absolution of his character because people want to interact with him but are uncomfy about the fascism thing is so lameeee and stupid lol imagine being so uncomfortable with a character you claim to love that you have to get rid of everything we know about him and invent an entirely new personality for him. boooo. grow up. you can be interested in fictional characters who are bad. although it is funny how much easier people seem to be able to reconcile their fav being a fascist than like. being a cheater or something. which is a cardinal sin apparently.
2. the black cat goth sassy millennial characterisation.
theres this really common characterisation of him where hes like this sassy dangerous deadpan tiktok-esque spurter of witticisms which i just find so cringy and boring and inaccurate. the whole 'ooh he takes his coffee black he looks like a cinnamon roll but he could kill you!!!!' thing that makes me feel like ive been dragged back to tumblr 2015. he kind of sucked he was a conservative who did one good thing in his life and got killed in the process i dont know where people have got this badass thing from he just wasnt. also the idea that he was a goth girl because his name was black? we can try a little harder than that come on now. but yeah im not trying to imply theres some moral problem with characterising him this way i just find it cringy and inaccurate and i think there are much more interesting things you can do with him
3. abuse + relationship with his brother.
another thing i find really annoying is the assumption that he was treated by his parents the same way his brother was. big disclaimer because i can hear the complaints already yes i accept that being a child in a house where there is abuse in and of itself in traumatic and horrifying. but there is no canon reason to believe he was directly abused by his parents the way his parents were, especially considering his brother seemed to be punished for transgressions against his parents. regulus was the good boy he was the better son and he did as they asked. i think people have begun to just assume he was also abused the way his brother was in order to make him more sympathetic or excuse his behaviour (not how this works anyway) and again i find it very lame. the dynamics we actually get from canon are consistently infinitely more complex and interesting than what people then do with them. as for his relationship with his brother theres the whole idea of sirius 'leaving' him in the house which is ridiculous and almost too laughable to discuss but. the idea that regulus is the victim of his abused brother running away...girls get real. he was in his room getting radicalised i dont feel sorry for him. plus his whole relationship with his brother tends to irritate me anyway--i dont know if these people just dont have siblings, but the whole ultra close, sirius being incredibly protective, would die for each other, them against the world thing again seems to contrast everything we actually know about that relationship and also...not all siblings are that close? like theyre just not? idk again, personal taste but i find their super healthy close relationship very boring its kind of a dealbreaker for me!
4. he wasnt conventionally attractive and if you cant deal with ur fav being ugly he's not ur fav
needed a section all of its own because thats how bad it annoys me but the way people swear to hell and back that he was actually super handsome. or 'umm he wasnt handsome but he was PRETTY. umm ummm ummm'. booo throws tomatoes at you. we know from canon (again like. one of five things we know about him). that he was not considered handsome, like his brother was. i find it so incredibly pathetic the way people who claim to like him deny this like their life depends on it and try to argue that actually he was like omg conventional beauty is everythinggggg to you people isnt it. omg this fictional character who isnt real is nothingggg to you if hes not described as a model is he. you cant really like him that bad!!!! again what a fun thing to lean into that fandom instead has to revise. the guy was not hot why does it bother you that bad omg. if you cant accept that i immediately know all ur opinions suck sorry its the same as when people have to pretend remus was some sort of hunky alt casanova to like him at this point just write an oc pleaseeee because you dont seem to like anything about him thats actually established. anyway. tl;dr he wasnt handsome get over it my god
5. he would not be friends with remus u guys just think he would be because you borrowed remus' personality to give him one
another dealbreaker for me i cannot read something that implies remus and regulus would be friends. to get the obvious out of the way: regulus was a fascist and remus is part of a minority group he would want dead. but otherwise the idea that theyd be friends confirms to me that someone doesnt get either of them and the only reason i think this has gained traction is because regulus doesnt have a personality and in order to position him and james as r/s 2.0 where james stands in for sirius, people just superimposed remus' fanon personality (quiet, sarcastic, dry, bookish, exasperated) onto regulus. which is a characterisation i dont like anyway but then because youve turned them into the same person people then say theyd get on...i cannot think of two people would be gel worse. theyd have nothing in common. nothing to say. absolutely nothing. they would sit in awkward, unpleasant silence. literally no two characters less suited to each other i am begging you. also the substitution of peter for him as the fourth person in their group nowadays bffr...not only is peter far more interesting but also he would not get on with any of them his brother included. i hate when i am reading a fic and he turns up when hes not supposed to. put him back! he belongs ina victorian dollshouse!
6. things i like + how i picture him.
okay done a LOT of moaning. again i dont really care about him as a character im not interested in him apart from how he affects sirius' character and i dont like jegulus so i dont really read much where hes a central figure but i do think he COULD be very interesting if done right, and so things i do like: characterisations that lean into the fact that he was a willing fascist as a teen, willingly radicalised, nasty nasty politics. i like a regulus who is very uptight, who has a very strained relationship with his brother as the younger brother to someone he knows would always have made a better heir than him, was better at practically everything but just didnt want to do it. i think living in the shadow of that would make him crazy uptight and touchy lol. as for stuff which is less grounded in canon and more just how i imagine him: i think he was a nerd, i think he was a serious young boy with a huge sense of responsibility, and i can imagine him having some sort of niche hobby which is quite antisocial like stamp collecting or model railways or reading big dense history books about ww2 or the magical equivalent of one of those. i think he was a bit weird and quite weak and sensitive. his brother is a massive sore point for him. he was not cool or sassy or badass i think he probably wore matching pyjama sets to bed and carried around a handkerchief with his initials embroidered into the corner and clung to his family and his wealth and his ancestry as a marker of his superiority and good breeding for dear fucking life because he did not have much else going for him.
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