#am i doing this whimsical tumblr thing right?

[furo-contra-machina]

🎶✨when you get this, list 5 songs you like to listen to, publish. then, send this ask to tag 10 whatever amount of your favorite followers (positivity is cool)🎶✨

Thanks for the tag, @come-chaos...you have excellent taste. I, too, will tag rather than ask.

If I was a dragon I would hoard favorite songs. Here are but 5 I've been looping this year :

Little World - Haujobb (New World March, 2011) Delicious Ape - HEALTH, Xiu Xiu (DISCO4 :: PART 1, 2020) Thanatos (A Calmer Collision Remix) - IAMX, A Calmer Collision (2023) Keeper of the Ledger - Woods of Ypres (Woods 5 : Grey Skies and Electric Light, 2012) No Yes More Less - Pig (The Merciless Light, 2022)

No pressure tags:

@sentryskyhawk @silurisanguine @chaosrising451 @battlekilt @xxfrozentrinityxx @systmiki @raynerberg @seascribbling @wildlyegregious @code1r15

[sgiandubh]

A tale of two brands

Sophie Mancini's Departures paper on S in NY started a flurry of comments even before the whole content was made available on blogs. That people - mostly in Mordor - jumped in to add their two booing cents on the matter, based on two or three Instagram Story screencaps only, is a testimony to Tumblr's community deep interest in S's slightest PR/sales move and the easiness with which people like *urv managed to push their own agenda, in the process, to her unsuspecting, bicep-loving crowd.

Many of these comments asked just one question, more or less kindly and more or less openly: who are you, Sam Roland Heughan? Some of them, more along my alley, took a different angle: who are you talking to, Sam Roland Heughan?

Let me count the US crowds: the Wall Street yuppie crowd? the old money, WASP Knickerbocker / Colony Club crowd? Tribeca's sophisticated, culture-ish snob crowd? the UN international crowd? the laid-back (-ish) brownstone Brooklyn crowd? the DC politico types? the Boston Brahmin crowd? the Silicon Valley Bitcoin crowd? the Florida Latino crowd? the Bible Belt crowd? the Deep South charmingly old-fashioned crowd? the yee-haw, witty and ambitious Texans? the gourmet, nature-loving Seattle crowd? I am sure I am missing some (it's been a while I haven't traveled to the States and I have to say I miss all 50 of them, plus and perhaps above all my beloved DC :), but you get the idea. And the problem, or rather its first layer.

The second question this very poorly written article prompted is: what are you talking about, Sam Roland Heughan? I mean, what destination are you trying to promote? Scotland, through your Scottish gin, which I truly believe is exceptional? The Big Apple, like a counterpart to Sting, you know - a Scotsman in New York? That's not very clear, since that superficial girl just whirled you to a couple Chinatown speakeasies, rat pitter-patter included (bye-bye, Knickerbocker crowd right there) and that's pretty much it. New Zealand, that you mention at length, Maori tattoo story re-hashed, just because the book comes out next Tuesday? Ha-wa-wee, perhaps in a belated attempt to mitigate Tunagate? California, even, because it takes you back to humble beginnings? Granted, the Frisco one, not LA: that would be a horrible faux-pas, in a NY centered paper, much like me whimsically and idiotically mentioning Istanbul (instead of Constantinople), in a conversation with my Greek friends.

My head spins. And then let's add to that a ladle of recycled talking points, yours and C's altogether, like this gem:

Aspirational. Mmmhm. She said that. You said that. Multiple times, in multiple contexts that probably didn't even call for it. This is *** PR right there. I am not JAMMF. I am not Claire. But we aspire to that. Stop thinking we are these characters. No sane fan ever did: the insistence is unnecessary and has a real backfire potential. Stop thinking, period. But let it be my shipper sin, then, not to believe an iota of it and stubbornly think you people are, by now, way past the aspirational stage.

So, I took a long walk down memory lane today, while driving, trying to understand what the hell your personal brand is. Once upon a time, things were clear: you and C were a single brand. S&C - the fresh-faced, candid, witty and funny and oh, so in love new kids on the block. The spark was real and it was strong (it still is, only dampened and muted by PR-prompted shenanigans) and OL's audience was under its spell. People loved you, both of you, and some of us still do. You showed us as much as you could and for a while, it seemed to be convenient for just about everybody. That created expectations, but at the same time, you could have sold us land concessions on the Moon and we would have bought them, no questions asked.

And then, things happened. We know what: IFH, EFH, Remarkable Week-end. The spell was broken for many, who left in droves. Fans turned into bashing other fans. The S&C brand was progressively compromised and along with it, your Barbour Ambassadorship (for different reasons). Let's stop a bit at this point, in fond remembrance: that was the perfect pitch, for the perfect kind of corporate brand, for the perfect niche, for the perfect guy. A guy who had a credible, authentic story to tell, with a really strong potential to attract people outside of OL's crowd. Image and message perfectly aligned. Best case scenario.

So, with ***'s and your own PR benediction, what once was your solid gold starting point was ridiculed, trampled, shot to shambles, in a (failed) attempt to be sent to complete oblivion. You then had to think of something and try to branch out of both the blessing and curse of it.

MPC suddenly became more important than just any other charity project, of which there were a few (Cahonas Scotland comes to mind, the blood cancer one, as well). Cue in Sam the Athlete, Sam the Healthy Living Evangelist. The project was turned into a lucrative business, with a strong charity side. People bought subscriptions, people changed their eating and lifestyle habits, people lost weight - but really, I shouldn't write 'people', but 'women'. This was a women-oriented endeavor. A problem, again, on the long term.

Ha-wa-wee 1 happened, to more scandal and shrieks (that, I believe, was the reason you lost the Barbour project, another gold opportunity squandered because ten Internet bitches knew better). Then we were told another avatar was born: Sam the Entrepreneur. With a genuine, carefully curated, labor of love first alcohol product that clearly used the discarded S&C brand: The Sassenach and believe what you want, but just buy it. Mommies obliged. Antis obliged. Shippers obliged. All wallets are created equal, as I (often) use to say. And then COVID-19 came, putting a very real, very dangerous logistic strain on it.

Yet, you still had to somehow mitigate delays and losses. The Sassenach went exotic, with that limited edition tequila that probably won't be remembered by many outside OL's fandom, and that is a pity and a shame. The reason it won't be remembered is that you almost did not promote it, spare one or two Tick-Tock and Instagram clips. Does that justify the investment, the trips to Mexico, the very expensive retainers and commissions your tequila friends took for their trouble? I very much doubt it. That was, until being proved completely wrong, a flop. It brought absolutely nothing in terms of personal branding, spare perhaps a new faction in this paranoid cesspool of a fandom: the Gay Crowd, fueled by the image of a Lonely Bandana Cowboy, instead of the intended Sophisticated Traveler and Connoisseur. Yes, people are stupid, like that. Your PR and Sales team, too - and this comes from a place of deep understanding and appreciation.

We are now talking gin and boy, am I glad we do! This is perhaps an opportunity. Finally, a more democratically price-tagged, carefully tailored (again) drawing card product. But who is selling it to me? The California Boat Party Host? In that case, I won't buy it, but never mind me: maybe the fun-loving California Millennials would (we know the Smuggling Mommies would do it, anyways). The Sophisticated Traveler and Connoisseur you tried to show us again in Mancini's abysmal Departures paper and who is invited to important events, in recognition of his efforts?

You can't have the two of them, Sam, whatever those incompetents told you. You're either a 43-years old midlife crisis-stricken and shirtless clown or an Old World Industrious Thespian, with a stature and a status to match. A real Entrepreneur, not a cartoon scuba diver/beach boy Influencer. Eye Candy vs. Brain Power: after all, you are a '3x NYT best selling author', aren't you? Your pick, not mine. Stop the Sri Mataji-style Hugging and Booze tours: it's nonsense and that geriatric crowd is nowhere near what you need to make your dream come true. Do some real soul searching and stop listening to clueless 28-year old journalists, who tell you tacky rings are fun: they aren't. They make you look like an ageing Atlantic City Sinatra wannabe:

Sam Roland Heughan: currently at crossroads, trying to not choose between two opposite personal brands. Tricky position and an even trickier context, with the strike still lingering on and the pressing need to find an after OL strategy.

I promised you a tale of two brands and I think you wonder, by now, what happened to C, the other half of the primary SC brand?

The answer is, I honestly believe, not much. She has no personal brand, so to speak. Until now, she is just an Enthusiastic Dilettante. Book Club - started, unfinished and with that, farewell to any fan engagement. Cinema production rights - bought and then silence. Botanical Gin - first batch released (?) with no promo, no interviews (mentioning it in a podcast does not count), no reviews. Then teasing, then crickets again: a bit late, now, for the end of year celebrations. And I have to say I miss her or the part of her I never witnessed in real time (is such a thing possible?). I miss that starry-eyed, funny and witty girl. That girl was somehow completely swallowed by an Acrid Matron, who thought it was intelligent to yell at an Internet nobody, on Christmas Day, 'I am not married to Sam!' (ok, you aren't, but you're still lying). And I honestly don't know which one is best (or worst, for that matter): try to build something and make mistakes and try again until you hopefully find your way, or say nothing, do nothing and of course, never be controversial.

Now I am really interested to see how is she going to promote her gin. But you know what, I am not holding my breath, for some reason.

[hongluboobs]

tumblr user hong lu boobs have you played any of the new canto yet im very interested in your thoughts

Yes I do!!! I don't want to make a big post on Some Of The Stuff til the whole canto is up (if you are aware of this account and some of my recent postings it may become aware of what i am talking about) but ohhghghgh. This shit Re Awakened the naive cyanism in me!! I thought it was gone. I thought I was over Hong Lu! I haven't even been doing my dailies and weeklies as of late that's how out of it i've been. but NOPE!! We are sooooo limback babey!!

(i apologize for yapping about hong lu right off the bat. its not that guy's turn yet. it's don's world and we are all just living it, but with the way don's character is structured my brain goes more towards a "wait and see" approach for her. I know it'll be awesome and i Am invested but like. this is hong lu boobs dot tumblr dot com. I'm sorry women)

I'll put some basic stuff above the cut and then some more spoiler-y stuff below.

HUGE fan of the presentation this canto. PJM continues to get crazier with this stuff every canto and this is no exception.

In the light of that previous bullet, I am fully expecting some meta fuckery here. They've pulled some cool stuff at the ends of cantos 5 and 6 but. this is the sinner about delusion/unreality! I Live In Fear of whatever pm is cooking.

The setting is also REALLY fun. whenever I saw a new battle bg i was cheering and clapping. they're all so fun and whimsical and there's so much potential for interesting things

I really like seeing how people dress in the north of the city! We've had so many new factions/branches of factions thrown at us so far and I love a lot of the outfits! Will this still hold true when I try to draw them and get upset at the level of detail after drawing standard formalwear on pm characters for so long? Maybe!

The CGs have been really clean so far? As an artist I get worried about this stuff sometimes because it's a lot of work to get done but all the ones I've seen so far are really nice :)

If you aren't reading passives and status effects this canto. do that. my brain might be a little too small atm to comprehend some of the gimmicks w the main enemy type but some of the wording in the enemies passives may be hinting at things. Also some of them are really funny

this Might be my favorite direction they've taken the OST? Honestly it's so hard to pick because this ost NEVER misses but I've been typing this whole thing to that one boss's theme (you know the one)

If you've played through the first part of the canto, feel free to click through the read more for some of my thoughts that delve more into spoiler territory

I am so intimidated anytime the screen goes black and I have to deal with various colored text and Scary Voiceover. I cannot say much on it aside from just how scared i get whenever it happens. I'm pretty bad at identifying voices (especially if i don't understand the language) but these lines just get. so interesting

Here they are all together for my convenience (and potentially yours :) )

I don't have a ton to say on it especially because anything I say can be proven wrong Very Quickly and I am not a don quixote scholar but I think the "Please, please! I don't want an adventure, stop! Please!" line from (who i assume to me) second kindred don is VERY interesting. much to think about regardless!

UPDATE: while I was writing this my buddy lu-is-not-ok (follow him. if you like what I do you'll like what he does.) sent me this image.

Yep, we've got identity stuff going on. Yellow seems to be Our Don Quixote (It's her text color, at least, but back then she'd be the bloodfiend second kindred, hence being able to obliterate that bear immediately, and acting less in line with the DQ we know and love) while red is... maybe the original don quixote? The original owner of rocinate at least,("Your running shoes look like they could fetch a nice price...") who seems obsessed with justice and fixers like ours. I haven't read the book so I don't feel like I can add a ton more to this aside from flat speculation but I am very interested in how this develops.

Ok now I want to talk about Hong Lu stuff. Let's ignore the elephant in the room for just a second :)

I'm a big fan of the exchange between Dante, Verg, and Hong Lu. THERE IS SO MUCH CONCERNING FORESHADOWING IN HERE!!!!! OH MY GOG. I can't handle it.

the specific wording of "the most lucid one" is SO interesting to me. fully expecting these cantos to be a True Combo. I was already anticipating it because they both have so much to do with rules and the boundary of reality and delusion but with the familial hierarchy theme present in bloodfiends its Definitely happening. And the light in Hong Lu's left eye going dimmer??? with the water theming being used??? Gloom/sinking themed distortion Please Please Please. you're nothing. Theres some water connections from the book irt the land of illusion (near the end bao-yu's enlightenment is seen as realizing that everything is akin to moonlight mirrored in the water- it ultimately doesn't matter and everything predestined to happen will occur regardless) and this water theming is present in Hong Lu as well (base ego) but it's really interesting to see it Like This.\

And now. there's probably some other stuff I can talk about but I wanna say things about The Elephant In The Room. If you follow my stuff and are caught up on this canto you know what I'm talking about.

I have been compiling a diagram with every mention of Hong Lu's family across all his dialogue. (which you can see here if interested, though it's now outdated for obvious reasons) We only really get vague mentions, the only direct family appearance is Jia Huan, who shows up to say one line and then fucks off.

I was not expecting to get stuff on Hong Lu This Early. They've been giving us mostly crumbs and I was NOT expecting to get hit by All This. I have been surviving on scraps and I just had the Hong Lu lore equivalent of a rotisserie chicken thrown to me. I'm kind of rusty on DOTRC because I haven't touched up on it in a while and as such I cannot give too many details but it's very interesting to see Xichun.

I'm going to check up on Xichun's characterization in the source later because there's so many characters in that book and she wasn't really one I had that close an eye on during my read. From what I remember, she's one of Bao-yu's cousins who lives in the garden with him, and eventually runs away to become a nun when the family starts falling into decline. (mirroring Bao-yu running away to become a monk for the same reasons.) I'm probably missing stuff I'll catch when I go out to reread the book, but based on how she's depicted here it gives me more of an idea about what themes of dotrc they're pushing for canto 8.

They're for sure emphasizing the familial abuse and how fucked up the jia family is. It almost reads like all of the siblings are in competition with each other (building "factions"). and Hong Lu has said his siblings have attempted to kill him before.

Hong Lu has been like this, which lines up with his book equivalent of Bao-yu, who is notorious for being childish/naive and not necessarily working within the pre established rules and conventions set up by his family. I'm curious how he's managed to survive this long with the jias a lot more willing to Kill Eachother.

"My most amicable sibling" fucks me up so much. what the hell is this family's deal man. I'm really curious about this line, because xichun is not a sibling but a cousin in the book. I'm curious what's gonna happen with Bao-chai and Dai-yu in Limbus because it's very challenging to adapt this story without those two. Dai-yu in Dotrc is one of the characters Bao-yu feels most comfortable being himself around. Generally, the female characters in DOTRC are better people than the male ones, and Bao-yu spends most of his time with the girls as a result. I'm curious how/if they'll adapt this because it's a pretty big thing in the book and they serve as an escape for Bao-yu from dealing with the nightmare that is people like his father. I feel if it was happening, they'd probably write Xichun a little kinder, but I don't know nearly enough to make any sort of call yet. Absolutely TERRIFIED (positive. this is a good thing) for what PM is cooking.

I'm gonna have to cut this off here because i have A Lot of thoughts but i also have many assignments to finish and have been typing this for way too long! Thank you for asking the question anon I hope you enjoyed reading some of my thoughts :) !!

[t00thpasteface]

hey! i was just curious if i could use your art in an artist study? i looked over your faq and i didn't see any mention of it so i just wanted to ask. it's okay if the answer is now, no pressure :)

(⁠ ⁠ꈍ⁠���⁠ꈍ⁠) sure, if you credit me! i would be incredibly flattered!!

now that being said, i would also like to share with you some artists whose work i've enjoyed doing studies of! i find it's very useful to "follow the money" with artists you like, and go along the chain of inspiration to see how ideas and styles can change from person to person.

vincent van gogh is my BIGGEST inspiration in terms of color and composition! his unique style of brush work is what he's best known for, but i recommend looking at his works holistically too, and seeing where the eye is led and how he plays with light, color, and mood. if you want to go further, he was very inspired not only by prior impressionists, but also by japanese ukiyo-e artwork— try comparing "starry night" to "great wave off kanagawa" and seeing the similarities in the grand, sweeping movements they convey.

i'm sure i've said this a million times, but genndy tartakovsky has probably my favorite cartoonist style. it's at its peak in samurai jack— opinions are mixed about the narrative quality of season 5, but if nothing else, the art direction is absolutely jawdropping. one of my favorite scenes is the bit in the tomb, where jack is hiding in a sarcophagus, because the music and visuals are paying homage to a scene at the climax of "the good the bad and the ugly"!

in a totally different direction from those two... i'm a huge fan of gil elvgren's pinup girls! i've had a few different pinup calendars over the years, and at the end of the year, i like to cut up the pages individually for mini posters— i've covered pretty much all my available wall space in his illustrations. i love it when artists don't feel the need to sacrifice expressiveness for realism; his girls are SO DARN CUTE and they all look like they're having so much whimsical, cartoonish, flirty fun!

here's a post where i talk about more inspirations!

here's a post listing some other tumblr artists i like!

i'm also just very heavily inspired by 50s-60s print illustration... things like advertisements, "clip art" (which you had to physically clip out of a book and paste onto the page), and of course, tv cartoons. one big trend i love with that "googie" art style is how incredibly limited the palettes were, and how efficient the economy of line was. as much as i love the bold, blocky, dynamic shapes of styles like tartakovsky, who takes insp

also, please remember i'm entirely self taught and am NOT an expert, so just be aware of that if you see any weird stylistic choices in my work... i admire the work of a lot of professionally trained artists, but that doesn't mean i have any training or real right to go around teaching people stuff. i'm just some guy from a big crazy family full of artists, only some of whom went to school for it.

okay, that got way longer than i meant it to, SORRY! here's a pic of my cat Carmen as a thanks for reading this far ^_^

[skzstoryvault]

Into the Earth (Hyunjin, spicy?)

Hyunjin x f!reader

multi-chapter fic

AU

happens a few years in the future

Hyunjin is in his post-idol era. Working as an artist and fashion icon.

Warnings: mentions of scamming, dishonesty, abusive people and various kinds of abuse, parasites (and not the Bong Joon Ho clever kind), misogyny (but not Hyunjin!), ageism. Nudity (Hyunjin). More to be added with later chapters.

This is in no way meant as a commentary on the real persons depicted here. They all deserve the world.

Please be kind.

Please do not report this post. If it's not your thing, just scroll away.

If you're underage, please scroll on, there is nothing for you here.

If you enjoy this story and are reading along, I would love to hear your comments in the replies, reblogs or DMs - however you feel most comfortable.

Like I mentioned, this story is finished, but I will slightly change its course based on the way the chapters are received.

Story title is inspired by a Lorna Shore song

Part 3

Part 4 - Men's Gossip You’re the owner of the farm and Hyunjin immediately became fond of you. He learned from his first evening there that everyone working for you loves you and follows you unconditionally. You are also a strong leader in the same way Chan was, back home. What you say goes and the people around you accept your word as law. Which is why, when he was new at the farm, Hyunjin was glad you accepted him right away, deemed him safe to stay past the two trial weeks, and asked him his preferred name. Fitting in was easy - thanks to you.

Later, you let him know that Agustin informed you of his file’s particularities. You also told him you know he is a super rich famous guy who could very well ruin your entire operation if he decided to hold a grudge, but Hyunjin swore up and down he would never do that because he did not come looking for drama and a fight and he knew nothing about running a farm, so it would be pure evil of him to try and take your farm just to destroy so many years of work only to, what? Flex on you? “I would have rather it not come out that I have a life elsewhere,” Hyunjin told you. “This way it could get weird.”

“I’m not allowed to share your secrets with the world. We take personal data protection seriously here. I guess I can admire your work ethic even more, knowing that you have the freedom to not do any of this if you so wish. But you choose to come here and get your hands dirty and put in the work every day. I respect the fuck out of that. However, I cannot control the others and they might sniff you out or casually run into content featuring your celebrity persona.” “I’m alright with that, and I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it, if at all. I noticed people are… different here. Much different. Maybe because I am the youngest here and… everyone else is older in a good way, having moved on from consuming celebrity content.” “That might be it. We do have internet and everything else here too, but most people here are too busy to keep track of what’s topping the charts and who sings which song. I try to keep up to date, so I don’t come across as a total fossil in our instagram reels, but I don’t always manage. There’s so much to remember and keep track of. Either way. You’re our Hyunjin now.” “Communist Bugs Bunny meme!” Hyunjin exclaimed. “You know that one?” “Who doesn’t? I said it on purpose to amuse myself. I was not sure you’d know it.” “Oh please. Korea is not on another planet. I also have a tumblr blog like everyone with a pulse.That’s how I keep up to date with memes.” He confessed. 

He thought of his days as an idol, and how much he struggled to give himself the feeling of it being normal by building routines, by participating in whimsical, childish things, by taking off to spontaneously picked destinations and trying to do normal young person things, alone or with the members. He knew it would drive him insane if he didn’t try to keep the grip of the idol aura on him at bay.

*** You’re also odd, in a good way, and Hyunjin learns about you from his co-workers. You are a software engineer, Eazi, one of the drivers, tells him one day over a shared lunch. A really good one, you used to own a plane with a hangar for it and you’re a licensed pilot. But you had your fill of flying everywhere and claimed that it was not just expensive but also unsustainable, so you sold everything and moved on to eco-friendlier pursuits - like the farm. “If it was me, I never would have sold a plane. A plane, can you imagine??? Once you are that cool, you can’t go on to being less cool, like imagine you had a Lamborghini and traded it for a bicycle and rode to work in the rain with only a beret on your head to protect you? Wild. But- she knows things. Does things in ways that keep us all on our toes and earn our respect. She got us all into EFTs and trading. So that when we are old, we are not at the State’s mercy. Not every boss does that.” Eazi comments. Hyunjin thinks a bit. He has money, but no one taught him how to invest it. He has a firm that manages his income, but he’s kept in the dark about most of it. And if they were to, somehow, sneak all of his wealth into an unknown account from an off-shore country one day, he’d be left to struggle. He would love to change that, as a part of taking some of his life back. Being a celebrity also means being required to trust a lot of people who don’t necessarily have your best interest at heart. “Oh Agustin told me that when I got hired. I wasn’t sure how it would work, but I am glad I was offered that too.” He muses. “We do not know what the deal is but she doesn’t date. Usually rich and eccentric people are always meeting up to drink champagne, snort drugs and fuck on yachts, but she never goes on that kind of trips and always, always takes the dogs. She trained them herself. You’d expect the Dobermen to be excellent at it but the Poodle is super smart and so well trained too. She told us he was a runt who was offered to her for free, as his breeder thought he was only pet quality. So even if a man wanted to get close, he would be taken down and eaten in no-time. Kree thinks maybe she got her heart broken or got betrayed otherwise and that is why she keeps the world at a distance.” “That’s not an irrational response. I’d be cautious too if people tried to scam me.” “Ye, you know, some dem White Men these days. They want a woman who submits to them and stays home pregnant, but somehow she still has to bring in the money so that they can be lazy and feel good.” Eazi says. “I would not know, my interactions with them are very limited. But I did notice no one seems to like women.” Hyunjin offers. “Except, maybe, for lesbians. And now it’s cool to say it out loud, too.” He thinks of his days as an idol, where he didn’t get to spend much time around women except at occasions - when doing collabs and dance challenges with girl groups. He and the rest of his members were also taught not to interact with the noonas from the admin, PR and styling teams, to prevent lawsuits, and thus not even casual friendships developed in that work environment. 

They were all over each other, back in the day, and he and Changbin used to joke that they were married and that they were wives - but underneath that they were just boys who were encouraged to put off growing up as much as possible. 

“Ha. you know? I would not be against you and our jefa being a thing. Maybe she likes guys who are more your type.” Eazi slips into the conversation. “Surely not. That would be unprofessional. I’m just a guy who fondles mangoes and puts them into little paper beds.” “This is not Korea, my guy. Besides, if you’re not going to find love when you are in this all-expenses paid paradise? Where are you going to find love? Tinder? Grindr? Where everyone is just meat on a hook and they all have the illusion that there’s always a next guy or girl around the corner who’s better.” “Got burnt, didn’t you?” Hyunjin calls him out. “Eh, yeah. It’s very… capitalistic. Very efficient. Which is why no one invests themselves into relationships they start like that. But I already got married. To a girl from here. She works in town at the post office, we’re saving for a house.” 

“Good for you, I mean, how old are you? You’re getting things done.” Hyunjin praises the man. 

“Yeah well it’s about time, in my culture I am past my expiry date. No woman from back home would even consider me because I’m old and would make ugly kids. And they don’t want to be poor. So I moved to here - where I am not poor, and where I began to question if I want kids. They are painful to make, for the wife, and then hard to raise. First we are going to be in love for a while. And get our house and enjoy our little corner together. Then we will see. Maybe a child will need a home.” 

“That’s… so kind of you, Eazi.” Hyunjin says, thinking of the man’s words. “You know, part of the reason why I fled to Europe was because my parents want me to have kids too… and I didn’t set out to not have kids, I just didn’t find anyone within the usual timeline for Korean men. And then, after seeing a bit more of the world? It occurred to me that finding love is so rare and precious, and if I find someone who doesn’t want kids or can’t have them, it won’t be a dealbreaker. Since, uh, I too am considered… past expiry date, like you put it.” “You look like a teenage girl. Even with the moustache!” Eazi says. “No homo, but you have those looks that women love. Even the cougar ones. Especially the cougars. Ayyyyy! Pretty man ting.” “Don’t say no homo, it sours up the compliment. You’re allowed to find people good looking and that only says you have eyes, not who you want to fuck. And besides… come for my moustache again and it’s hands!”

“Ooop, you have a set of massive balls on you Hyunjin. I respect that. Notes taken.” Eazi says. He’s not mean or evil, he just spoke without thinking and he wants to stay on good terms with Hyunjin.

Part 5

[seventeenlovesthree]

You know, one thing about getting older, at least for me, is the realization that keeping up that whimsical spirit is hard. Very hard.

I have spent the past four years trying to maintain routines in regards to self-care and, while it worked out well for a period of time, the "noise" out there is very persistent to break your habits. By "noise", I don't just mean the world out there, the constant stream of social media providing you with news and tragedies, a ruthless algorithm that is very hard to avoid if you're seeking that little serotonin streak out there. Yes, I agree that our attention spans have been pretty much messed up and that it's VERY difficult to get back to some... Quiet.

That's why the noise basically refers to everything - your social life, family, friends, partners, acquaintances, colleagues, all the people out there, but also the things you surround yourself with. Habits, food choices and sleeping rhythms, once again, the media you consume while trying not get consumed by it...

I keep going on about how I had re-started drawing back in 2021 after a rough 10-year-break in which I simply didn't feel like drawing at all. I was occupied with other things during time - and if you're familiar with my tumblr, you know that that's been heavily related to football. I loved my clubs, I loved by NT and for the longest time, I could get by despite the set-backs and bad developments surrounding it. Right now I am staring at my PC and am slowly but steadily realizing that basically all the players that led me towards football have retired. Either just from the NT or completely. There are players, relatable figures, people I (used to) look up to, that inspired me, that brought be through the day, week, month, year. It was a fun time. But then the "noise" took over. The people I rambled with ended up just as frustrated and left. Only a few of them are left, but the majority - me included - has moved on to other things. Why? Because it had become too draining, too negative. The bubble had popped, several figures in the business had turned out to be unbelievably "bad people" (I'll keep this PG), things were so commercialized, unfamiliar and just... Opportunistic. The "whimsical spirit" was so hard to maintain and even if this Summer provided a little spark, it still feels alienating. There is still a glimpse of hope, but, again, you REALLY have to hold onto that.

The same goes for my other "fandoms" to be honest. Don't get me wrong, I still have fun sitting in my little corner and draw, write and create little things - even if it's mostly for myself, sometimes I do wonder why interactions have become so scarce. The atmosphere on social media is incredibly... Empty sometimes. I'm not just saying that because a lot of people have not grasped the reblogging system on this site. You may have heard the concept of people being overexposed by the neverending stream of art, "content" being thrown at them from all sides... It's become more of a product to consume than a thing to look at and enjoy and savour. And I feel that myself. I used to save fanart to my phone and computer and find myself looking at it countless times. I still do that with several art pieces, but... I assume it's because the brain has become somewhat tired that we cannot appreciate it like we used to.

Everything is just... Happening too fast and I feel like I need to have a detox every now and then. My brain still craves the serotonin of seeing new, beautiful art. But to get there, I have to get through a sea of things that get me anxious. Even with filters, even with blocking things I don't wanna see... It's not the same.

The same also applies to media in general - I'm currently in a fandom of a series that's kinda "walking on air". There is the possibility of a new animation being planned out there somewhere, somewhen, maybe... But a part of me isn't even sure if I want something "new". Consider myself "old" when I say this, but a lot of things that come out these days, sequels, reboots, remakes of things I used to enjoy as a kid... Simply don't hit the same way anymore. There's a reason why I find myself rewatching the old stuff over and over again and often have quite a mixed relationship with more recent things. EVA is one of the few franchises that, in my opinion, managed to get to a satisfying ending after ALL these years, but I am TERRIFIED for the new Madoka movie. I haven't even dared to look at Sailor Moon Cosmos, simply because I know my brain is tainted by how much enjoyed the 90s anime and how much of a clusterf*ck Crystal/Eternal/Cosmos has been for the past ten years... On the same note, do we really need a One Piece remake? And Digimon? I would loathe the idea of an Adventure remake... Because it would not only contradict the messages of the previous entries of the series; move on but keep the things you love close to you... It would simply not... Satisfy me. A part of me wants to see how the OG timeline goes on, but what if there'll be things to contradict it all even more? Do I want things to go on for the sake of keeping the nostalgia alive, even though the fear of mischaracterizations is very real? Do I really want the milking of the cash-cow to continue? To hunt for breadcrumbs? The commercialisation and... Opportunism? And why does it feel like I've heard that before...?

I don't want to end this post on a negative note. I'm gonna turn 34 in a few weeks, I've been into TV shows and had my hyperfocus topics basically since I was like 7 or so. I might always find things that keep the whimsical spirit alive to some degree. But I need to remind myself to not let the "noise" get too loud every once in a while.

[outofthiisworld]

GET TO KNOW YOUR ADMIN !!

name: Boo! pronouns: She/They (no preference, i like both :3)  preferred comms: tumblr ims mostly! if we mesh well+spoken ooc a lot we can chat on discord too :) i uuh do tend to forget to check my discord messages outside of my webhooks however names of muse: Ophelia, Doc, Copycat and Father Necrosis rn! A few ✨secret-menu✨ muses/npc’s as well

experience in RP: been rp’ing since i was 13 so bout 14 yrs exp rn! (i say 10+ in my rules tho cause that’s one less number i have to change each birthday)— most of my experiences have been w/ a close knit group of buds that soon turned into 1+1 rp’ing with a bestie im still VERY close with :3c

i dabbled in online rp’ing around eeeeeehhh 2015ish but i certainly wasnt putting myself out there like i am now sdfsdfg

best experiences: the entirety of this blog tbh. a few bumps in the road and learning curves to get back into the groove of things, but ultimately i feel like a carved out a really excellent and chill lil’ corner on this site :”) special shoutouts to some really INCREDIBLE partners and buds that make rp’ing on here beyond delightful:

@pzfr is a phenomenal writer, a beyond thoughtful rp partner and perhaps a bit too powerful of a creative— personally if some horrific yet comedic demise should befall me then i trust full custody of doc & ophelia to him 100% HE GETS IT (don’t u worry i’ll live forever tho). For real though, there's such genuine love in the way he works with the genres that inspire him as well as with writing as a whole! @5mind GAAAARLIIIIIIIC. we continuously cook up dubious foods in the dms; our plots are forebodingly diabolical (affectionate) and [covering garlic's ears] i still plan to consume their brain for power. he’s got THE most creative and inspired never before seen characters on this side of the universe that i adore so so so much and tbh if you aren’t following her like…….bro be fr with me rn like why @riiese Mark’s writing legitimately inspires me. They are THE voice master dude. The way they weave words together feels right out of a fairytale with this whimsical magic to it that gets me lost in the moment!!! i can’t help but get swept up in their beautiful prose!!! @dynamoprotocol BRO lowkey i remember being shocked when I saw he followed me. From the writing, the care to detail, the art, Clarissa/Chance’s development, the worldbuilding, AND he’s CHILL AS FUCK??? and you wanna follow ME dude??? for real though, i cant sing enough high praises!! @natterghast i stumbled upon her by chance and sooooooo happy i did <33 their ocs absolutely captivated me, each one has this cozy cosmic horror vibe that im? obsessed with?? AND THE WAY SHE WRITES IS SO GORGEOUS AND FULL OF MEANING AND CARE THEY PUT IN AND [wrattling the bars in my enclosure]

there are so many more i can shout out but i will have to cap it here since this post has gotten ... so long and i am now so sleepy. Genuinely though, everyone I follow and get to see pop up on my dash both makes me day and inspires me as a creative each and every time!!!

pet peeves/dealbreakers: the biggest ones for me rn are like … needlessly aggressive ooc attitudes, be it towards anons, in rules, in posts— esp if someone is flaunting about being mean i uh. have fun i guess? not for me.

Condescending rules, especially those geared towards oc’s, might even result in an insta-block from me. (i promise it’s okay to just say ur selective overall and leave it at that).

muse preference ( fluff, angst, smut ): I generally like to lean more into light-hearted & comedic stuff, esp when first interacting but cus it’s fun! Once I get comfy with my rp buds tho i do loooooove to get into the meat n potatoes— the drama, the action, THE DRAMA!!! <- but a nice balance is important to me!

if everything is doom n’ gloom all the time without either a break, some sort of bitter-sweetness, and/or light at the end of the tunnel— then The Dread™ starts to feel too much for me :0 that being said … horror is … so much fun too <3

plot or memes: memes are a life savior esp when it comes to breaking the ice— i wouldn’t be cookin’ up like. any of the delectable plots i got brewing in the dms without em >:0

long or short replies: BOTH! i tend to naturally lean towards longer replies, moreso because i always have A Lot To Say™️ but i love goofing around with shorter stuff <3

best time to write: if i had my way it’d be an hour or two after i wake up in the morning and made myself my fancy energy drink + did my n.eopets dailies 💕 i try to make sure i get one day off like this each weekend it’s so lovely. Otherwise, i try not to stress about it too much and do what i can. i want my rp buds to know i genuinely dont mind waiting for replies or anything and i think it starts with how you hold yourself to that same degree too

are you like your muse?: ooooo aren’t we all in some way? it’s important to sprinkle some part or facet of YOU into them, especially ocs!

i will say, Doc is far closer alike to me versus anyone else on this blog, esp when it comes to values! he’s just far more gung-ho that i could ever have the energy to be tho. also i hope im not as stubborn as him 💀

i did give Ophelia my weird girl tendencies tho but cranked that shit up into MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE!!!

tagged by: @pzfr

tagging: i uh. i think most of my mutuals already got tagged this SO if you see this and you havent........PLEASE do this and tag me weeheehee <3

[superfallingstars]

Ok how about a Yule ball afterparty in Gryffindor tower?

(From Remus-poopin) (why am I signing my tumblr anons like letters)

send me playlist prompts!

Me from the future after writing this whole thing: What a fun and innocuous prompt! I’m sure this will have a short and succinct answer that stays relevant to this simple yet thoughtful topic the whole time!

Ok I actually really struggled with this one! I think it’s because I rely a lot on lyrics when I make playlists, but an afterparty isn’t really the time or place for deeply introspective and relevant lyrics – it’s for CERTIFIED BANGERS ONLY. However this sent me down a super interesting rabbit hole because, out of curiosity and for inspiration (and because I’ve been obsessively watching Todd in the Shadows for months now), I started looking at the UK Singles Charts in 1994. And oh my god what an insane history lesson, because so many of these songs are honestly just bewildering. Why the fuck was Bat Out of Hell charting in 1994? Actually there’s kind of a lot of Meat Loaf on here for some reason? And then there are basically a million awful downtempo power ballads, especially from washed up rock stars like Bon Jovi and Bryan Adams... Some smoooooth synthy boy band picks from Boyzone, East 17, and Take That… Some truly insane dance songs that made me go, oh right, this is the Blue (Da Ba Dee) era (special shoutout to “Doop - dooper than doop” by Doop, which made me feel like my brain was melting right out of my skull)... There was also a decent amount of reggae, which was nearly the only tolerable stuff on the charts (Chaka Demus & Pliers’s “Twist and Shout” is a fabulous summer jam, and honorable mention to that version of “Girls Just Want to Have Fun” with a reggae beat behind it, which honestly kind of slaps. And of course there was some Britpop (tbh was expecting more of it), especially Oasis because this was their debut year

There are also some things that charted that are just completely fucking insane tho. “I Like to Move It” charted? “Cotton Eye Joe”? “Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers”? “Come On You Reds,” made famous by Manchester United? The B-52s’s “Meet The Flintstones”....? And perhaps most mind-boggling, the bizarre novelty children’s song “Mr Blobby” (?????), which I guess was like, the “Baby Shark” of 1994? Anyway I now believe Dudley sang this nonstop all summer to drive Harry insane (with Aunt Petunia being like, “Oh, what a beautiful voice you have, Duddykins! I’m sure we’ll see you on Top of the Pops someday!” and Harry’s like. Kill me).

Oh right I was supposed to make a playlist. Well I did do that. And Meat Loaf is indeed on it, and I wouldn’t have put him on here if I hadn’t listened to every top ten song on the 1994 Singles Chart, so I guess I can say my research was extremely relevant and also very much worth it

Track list:

Let’s Dance - David Bowie: banger of all time. I don’t care that it’s from the 80s it’s a classic

Blur - Girls & Boys: shockingly this iconic song did not chart (only "Parklife" did), but we love a danceable Britpop moment

Radiohead - Creep: I fully believe this happened. Like Harry gets this song. Partly because he’s literally like fourteen this is such a song for being fourteen

The London Suede - So Young: I feel like this song has a sort of whimsical dreaminess that makes it really quite magical. Maybe it’s just the “let’s chase the dragon” part

EMF - Unbelievable: again that Britpop/dance fusion is like 1000% the vibe here

ELO - Livin’ Thing: it’s like maaaagic :-)

Primal Scream - Rocks: I’m always stunned by the variety in Primal Scream’s music… They were basically the Britpop/dance blueprint, but before that they were a lovely little indie jangle pop band, and then this song is like, a stomp clap rock song (and it charted)

Mannfred Mann’s Earth Band - Blinded By The Light: If we’re putting Meat Loaf on here then this is going on here too. This is like one of The Most Gryffindor Songs Ever to me

Oasis - Whatever: I felt obligated to put at least one Oasis song on here because it was the year of Definitely Maybe and out of the three that charted I went with this one. Love the strings and the sheer bigness of it, like it really just bulldozes over you for six minutes straight. Also I could see Liam and Noel being problematic Gryffindors

Meat Loaf - I’d Do Anything For Love (But I Won’t Do That): The moment we’ve all been waiting for. This song was in the top ten for 14 WEEKS (!) and peaked at NUMBER FUCKING 1! But if you can buy into the bombast (the very thing that I think makes it Gryffindor to me), it kinda goes absolutely crazy.

Anyway sorry this devolved into insanity but I hope you enjoy this playlist and also that you annoy everyone in your life with Mr. Blobby. Also idk why I didn't think of it for the other asks but I'm going to tag you lol @remus-poopin

[m0e-ru]

tohruest adachiest manager's choice experience as compiled by the tumblr branch moel gas station 2023

helloooo my dearest okyakusan my most wonderful customers whether you have a membership card or just passing by. Here is the manager's choice of how to have the most tohru adachi experience ever 📣📣📣

this post will have a breakdown of the whole diagram with highlights, and my own opinions of each medium stated. Otherwise, here's a summary as a list!!

YES!!

Persona 4 (PS2 2008)

Standalone Drama CD Vol. 3 (scattered cameos)

Manga Adaptation (Sogabe)

adachi jumpscare table

Vol. 10; Chapter 54

Vol. 12

Arena Ultimax; Episode Adachi

Arena Ultimax Manga Adaptation (Rokuro Saito special mention!??)

this is a bit cool too

The Golden Animation

Blu-ray/DVD Vol. 2; Bonus Drama CD: A Sense of Gratitude

Blu-ray/DVD Vol. 4; Bonus Drama CD: Boo ~ I bear a grudge on you ~

The Animation

Standalone Drama CD Vol. 2: You'll understand when you get older

The Golden (PS VITA 2013) (Social Link, new events, etc.)

um

The Golden Animation

Episode 6: See? I told you Yu.

Episode 7: It’s cliché, so what?

Unaired Bonus Episode “Another End Episode”: Thank you Mr. Accomplice

other opinions 

I’ll be linking all available online resources for everything I’ve stated!! If a link is broken or the media is inaccessible, hit me up!! I have my own personal archive.

YES!! segment !! wahoo !!!!! this is where i constantly stuff my nose in whenever i want a good reference on adachis character. AND THEY'RE ALL PERFECT TO ME!! <- about the media

Persona 4 (PS2 2008)

Back to basics everybody!!! Let’s remember who this goofball is from the start. Forget he has a social link and see him be the bumbling fool for plot exposition and the real murderer !!!! Just like how I tell you not to reference the attendant during 3/20, we can put Shadow Adachi’s mannerisms and his influence under literal god aside and try and focus on what that means as symbolism and extra information on Adachi himself!!

Standalone Drama CD Vol. 3

THIS IS A FUN ONE he has scattered cameos throughout the drama and was essentially being dragged around by Dojima.

Basic premise of this volume that it’s sports festival season!! Yasogami’s at it and the IT are participating, as well as Nanako—although she worries that her dad won’t even come to see her and that she wouldn’t even be able to do the family three-legged race.

Adachi’s appearances here are so stupid, he says he was an “elite” then flops trying to help high-schoolers with homework because Naoto’s there. He does his usual begging and whining with Dojima etc etc he also drove Dojima to compete with Nanako after saying the man finished all his reports as fast as possible.

I like this one because it reinforces who Adachi is based mostly from the main game. With the context that fans listening are aware he’s the culprit (or not), they do sprinkle in his “emptiness” (<- no i'm exaggerating it sorry) and bring it to the front of the picture a bit.

Translated Transcript: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/14uOTyzic9Ij9DjN4ZRNBLFTcGe0UF-PvX4qMnqcs2Fk/edit#gid=283104639

Available video link: https://youtu.be/p3yDNbczEqg?t=228 (timestamped to 3:49)

Manga Adaptation (Sogabe)

SOUJI SETA TRUTHER COMING IN STRONG also i just adore Sogabe’s adaptation on the game as a whole. While I am Marie lover#1, this manga did begin in 2008, and I like to think it’s the hypothetical that Marie really was expunged completely OKAY WHERE WAS I

As mentioned, this whole adaptation focuses on the game before Golden was ever a thing. No scooters, no extra events, no nothing. Although, Sogabe did write in a bit of Adachi’s Social Link in a context best suited for Souji.

I like Sogabe's take on Adachi in the manner of how he draws him and writes him as a character. It's not as whimsical or lazy like the anime, and the way he took the downhill spiral of the Hospital arc, from November to December, just actually felt like my emotions were ready in the right places. Surprisingly, in every adaptation, I was really enamored to see how Adachi acted differently in each one.

In the manga, he didn't seem as slack jawed as he did in the game at least. He looked like he was trying so hard to act concerned when he he actually feels guilty for everything going down !!! OR MAYBE NOT !!!!!!!

compared to the game, you can really how much he exudes of being so. plastic. ung kaplastikan. and you're mad not because you're stuck with ps2 limitations of three polygons of an arm waving around, but you're mad that he reeks of faking concern. But also unlike the game, you don't understand what's going on anymore because of the things that have transpired in relation to Adachi's character. Which is Sogabe's adaptation of his Social Link with Souji through having dinner with each other.

and Souji doesn’t know him! They share things with one another that one dinner but otherwise, Adachi’s never rambled on about himself as much as he does in a normal Social Link run. There is a different sort of motive with Souji and he wants to some things wrap things up while everything else is falling apart around him. If there’s a chance to help someone, even if he’s only talked thoroughly once or twice and that the other party’s opened up a single time to him, he’s the boy who wants to get through to people either way. What if Souji’s a bit selfish himself and wants to be in control of things when everything in his life and vision are literally blurring as he breathes? (takes place in november when nanako's hospitalized btw)

I love the lack of intimacy between the two, contrary to what majority of the fan base wants or even BELIEVES. Souji is a kid with a year in Inaba, of course he does a million other things with his time than hang out with an adult that’s some kind of darker version of himself and a representation of a possible bleaker future considering how similar they are. 

As for the specific chapters, I think it’s fulfilling to go through the whole manga from the start. Like, forget everything you know about P4 for a second and experience it as fresh as possible. Then you get to Chapter 54 to see Adachi’s condensed Social Link and get to Volume 12 to see things come together. Sure, I start getting a bit iffy with Volume 13 but I enjoy the parallels between the two, genuinely.

i have more stuff locked and loaded but uhmmm yeah 👍

Available manga link: https://manhuascan.me/manga/persona-4-official 

VISUALIVE (stageplay)

you will never see adachi ever act like a cunt like this ever again. he only does it once because hes gay.

i have made a million essays about this this is the foundation of this gas station itself

Available video links to the only things i’ve subbed ever because they’re the most important ones to this fruit’s development:

https://youtu.be/mWRB1dIgFNE

https://youtu.be/QRps3M9uXiw

or you can watch the whole thing because Masami Itou’s portrayal of him is just delightful: https://youtu.be/7oTpjmeD-mk 

Arena Ultimax; Episode Adachi

hahaha. haha. laughs weakly. haha.

I would kindly ask everybody to do this in Japanese dub but otherwise ehmmm yeah ! Episode Adachy. I do enjoy how they try to elaborate how his personalities are coalescing into a single face as he doesnt have to fake around people anymore. Like the fact that his lame humor is still present and he’ll do stupid voices, which makes you wonder if he was always like this or that it’s something he adopted while acting out the last facade he’s done for over a year—or more. 

HE IS SO FUCKING OPINIONATED AND THINKS HES SO COOL he has SO MUCH PRIDE but also he doesnt at the same time. you think hes a soldier surviving in the idgaf war but hes still dying in the mines he planted and crossfire for multiple reasons. hes simultaneously a teenage girl and a man in his late twenties.

Adachi is totally giving a fuck, not just in a white girl bully “I’m better than everyone” kind of way but like he’s totally giving a fuck about a lot of things. “Oh I gotta stop whatever this god has going down for this city in bumfuck nowhere because the case is going to go around in circles and i’ll never serve jail time in peace” how many times has he turned corners in an alleyway maze just by saying this.

hes literally trembling in his shoes with everything happening in that hour but hes just so good at bottling up emotions from others and HIMSELF. Theres only so much he’ll admit in his own monologue—in his own thoughts. That hes aware of things but he’ll never say it out loud even in his own head i’ll tear him apart with my bare hands <- i am just genuinely annoyed he can do this and not me but i should be grateful that i can express myself than be an emotionally repressed asshole 

He finds kids who are mirrors where he sees himself in. One, a goody two-shoes who has it all, the other an actual brat with a fucked up life from loneliness, isolation, and abuse (a million other things). And he’s not annoyed only because he finds similarities between him and them, but the fact that they’re children and they have at least a decade more than his ass which he spent sulking about with.

He’s mad at Bancho because he has his way from the kindness and generosity of his time he’s spent with others, something Adachi didn’t do; in which he could use his situation with his family and education as an excuse, but he never brings that up because as much as he likes seeing others eat shit and he has his way, Adachi also considers himself a fuckup. can you see this irony. So many chances to get out there and socialize, but he stuck his nose in his studies thinking a good future’s already laid out for him—BUT THE BUBBLE POPPED which is what fucking happens when youre in Japanese economic depression after the bubble economy. and you dont bother to leave your comfort zone either EVEN WHEN YOU DONT NECESSARILY like the things youre doing because it’s the only damn thing you’re used to !!!!

He’s sick of Sho because he’s an oversized 10 year old who’s doing the exact same thing Adachi’s done in the past and Adachi is sick of that. he hates himself. and he’ll hate a kid for acting the same way. He’ll project so much he’ll fix another person’s mistakes not out of pure goodness of his heart, but because he doesnt like himself as a person no matter how much he tries to deflect these thoughts in his own head.

Adachi’ll scoff and nitpick Narukami because he doesn’t want to admit this better version of him is better. That he’s not this other guy, but rather, he’s just himself. He complains and whines about Dojima and even says he “hates him,” but is everyone not aware he’s the second biggest tsundere in this series next to Marie at this point. they are COMPETING for that number one title.

no matter how many times he tries to sever connections for the sake of the other party, those bonds are developed enough for the other party to WANT to tie it back together. he doesnt know how to build bridges, but he doesnt know how to properly burn them either. hes sloppy at everything he does. he is gay.

okay sorry about that im sososo dizzy honestly. where was i. i talked about his issue with his Persona before and how it isnt his Persona a million times on this blog sorry i really everything's spinning right now 'and you're still writing an adachi essay?' hushup

Japanese Bubble Economy: https://www.britannica.com/topic/bubble-economy 

Available Video Link: https://youtu.be/0TkRLCGqT3g 

Arena Ultimax Manga Adaptation (Rokuro Saito)

this is a bit funny. i read it mostly for Sho like. while i do adore it as very beautiful adaptation. when it comes to adachi uhh. hmm. looks around. the rokuro saito effect. he did mementos mission too if you're wondering and what I mean by this.

I mean he did reinforce Adachi getting proper police training and essentially being above average to the top of his classes (krav maga, shooting accuracy, detectivisms, etc.). His humor and mannerisms are also delightful i think personally with the way they're illustrated and essentially visualized. Rokusai has his quirk for drawing everybody really pretty which he does really well for Persona characters, but it also caught me really off guard when he works on adachi like okay! sho breaking his ribs can fix everything itsok.

Available manga link: https://m.manganelo.com/manga-cn116859

OH now this is the section where im a bit iffy with the characterization here but i still like to reference it sometimes

The Golden Animation

Blu-ray/DVD Vol. 2; Bonus Drama CD: A Sense of Gratitude

Adachi doesnt have a big part here he’s literally there to help with the Dojima garden and Narukami plants cabbages for him.

Available Video Link: https://youtu.be/1SNKljdyUcY?t=640 (timestamped to 10:40)

Blu-ray/DVD Vol. 4; Bonus Drama CD: Boo ~ I bear a grudge on you ~

THIS. this, goodness gracious it was so silly. Adachi’s here for a few segments with Dojima in the pub. Detective yaoi if thats what you’re into I guess. He also sounds a bit cheeky here in speaking tone and the scheme he’s pulling to call Naoto to do their job while Dojima’s knocked out on duty.

Available Video Link: https://youtu.be/PasKTZtKx_c?t=720 (timestamped at 12:00)

The Animation

i dont have much to say about the actual anime i dont really watch it, but i respect the Narukami truthers out there. It’s just not for me, nor do I reference it for Adachi at all. why does he look like this

i dont have that much judgement to say if it's good enough to use as reference for Adachi besides it visualizing how much of a goofball he is, I guess I could mention that. I have issues of it depicting lore but otherwise i dont think it's that much different than what the base game pulls besides it different pacing to better fit the animation medium.

Standalone Drama CD Vol. 2: You'll understand when you get older

Not particularly partial with this one because the anime gave Narukami a face, like he’s his own character here. Dojima makes Adachi go to Okina and deliver something because his clown ass forgot to hand it over to the other prefect police who visited within the day. Narukami’s off to go help Ebi stand in line for a makeup promo and Dojima says they can go together. There’s a subplot with the IT where they think Narukami’s being arrested lol so they go follow him throughout the rest of the drama.

Adachi just hangs out with the silly billy that is his boss’ nephew who has so much kindness and generosity that it could get the kid killed one day.

Available Video Playlist Link: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2Wysh6PBhe_jyqxxIcyt_XrW6GcKHRn0 

The Golden (PS VITA 2013)

I scratch my head and wonder what they were going for with Adachi’s Social Link besides the fanservice. I mean thats what they did with akc in royal i guess. <- has my own opinions about this but im closing my mouth.

It feels a bit too… intimate for me? What’s the deal with WANTING to invite him for dinner… without Dojima around either. Like they’re a two in one package for me, you can’t see one without the other most of the time. Like Adachi’s slacking off work while Dojima’s slaving away by himself? I’ve always believed they get off at the same time or something because of the subordinate status.

I did enjoy the Junes segments though, it kind of felt like it was a good placement—if you move things around a bit. Him hiding behind your back while you’re doing groceries so it looks like he’s busy was a bit funny, and him chatting you up while you’re supposed to be busy yourself is also silly if you consider that Bancho himself wants to bail and was just caught into his chismosa and whining. He has enough of a degree of association with you as you’re putting your nose into the murder case and that you’re his boss’ nephew, so that’s kind of why you’re the only few people he can talk to.

(pauses yes or yes ) i also ate ice cream where was I going with this

dont make me talk about the accomplice ending that thing’s pretty corny to me but also unnerving i dont want to think about it alot.

With the way things have gone for Adachi’s new characterization with the added Social Link and the new events for Golden, it personally made me think twice about it all, especially when his TV studio and Shadow self ended up the same. There’s a lot to go about this? (<- deranged) and I will admit that I myself got sucked into the idea that he’s an antagonist and couldn’t truly experience everything right at that point. whoopsie. Then again, looking at it at this point in time after a few years makes me realize yeah maybe this does make a bit of sense! The nature of the fog has changed, which can explain the drastic change in character between Namatame and Adachi. which is an essay for another day I really feel a bit out of it.

The “um” segment. Stuff I dont really like to reference nor put in the pot that makes adachi soup because im really iffy with it and how the writing was taken liberally for the sake of the audience rather than the reinforcement of source material itself.

The Golden Animation

The Adachi centric episodes 6, 7, and the accomplice ending bonus episode lol, as the whole Golden anime was really for Marie and other new Golden add-ons like Okina and scooters and ski trip and etc. 

how do I put this. im really opinionated on this segment it’s okay if you dont take my word for it. I dont like the production quality. The animation is honestly really bad and the artstyle itsnt tasteful with how it’s executed. There’s enough frames of Marie that people looking over my shoulder while I watch would call her Adachi. It really is a boatload of a cashgrab and fanservice that kind of adds new insightful things to the lore but honestly? I don;t trust it. Like the writers forgot what they were writing about and started writing fanfiction of what they originally made.

It did give some insight with Adachi, but I hate how they just made Narukami the way he is for this adaptation. Like the boy does have all the time in world and hes not an overworked high-schooler with so many commitments now he can… make a man dinner and deliver it to him…? I would definitely say “> Adachi doesn't seem to lead a nutritionally balanced life...” and leave it at that, i am not making him dinner i dont have time for that. can someone get this guy a girlfriend please. Don’t get me started how they treated his character development and lore surrounding him overall im sick of it. At least Sogabe made it all look pretty.

anyway here’s the part where i can add my closing thoughts as someone who fills a niche solely because they think and enjoy things so differently than the present majority. I don’t think im mature enough to enjoy things peacefully in a community full of different people but also because im losing the idgaf war myself. I’m glad I can enjoy a media in general and I’m so happy when people can enjoy it with me. (had to stop the cat from clawing on the vacuum he likes the texture apparently) where was I

hold my hand as i go through a hundred coming of age arcs in my life and that one day i wont be as embarrassed as i am now to admit i like tohru adachi as a character and talk about him with a restraint so childish because I dislike how a majority depict him. he’s part of my journey as i learn things about myself as much as mimi but in a more human way because. hes human. or something. one day i can forget his reputation in the community and create all the things i make with pure love that is not fueled by spite to be right and correct. I already know i am right and correct because everyone can enjoy things their own way and find things that they like in one thing that are different from things others like. for now, i will still treat him like an insufferable uncle older brother thing whose arm i periodically chew on until i reach bone and let him carry me back to bed when im tired of being annoyed of him. 

[kafkasgirlhood]

Hello! I've been learning a little bit about hellenism recently and I feel a bit connected to it. I've never felt connected to a religion before, and I love learning about all sorts of different religions. I'm not sure if this is a sign

I've also never been religious, and was raised in a religious hating household. You're the first blog that came to mind when to ask about this, but do you think this is a sign of some sort?? Should I follow it?? (I'm very sacred to ask this, I'm very sorry for asking this)

hiyaaa !! don't be sorry for asking ! it's good to ask questions , especially when you need advice !! my asks are always open , to anyone that would like to ask anything , that includes YOUU !

here's a bit about my own personal beliefs so you understand the perspective i'm answering from. i believe everyone has their own individual truths that they have to find for themselves, which is why people from different religions have different experiences that serve as their own upg ( unverified personal gnosis ). your truth can be anything from atheism, gnosticism, polytheism, monotheism, etc etc etc to animism, pantheism, panentheism, etc etc etc!

so from my perspective , if that were me , i would see that as a reason to look into it. however , i cannot say whether or not it is a sign. i cannot speak for the gods, nor can i speak on behalf of the entire religion. but i wholeheartedly believe that if you feel connected to the religion and you are willing to try it and see if it works for you—see if it's your truth—by all means, go for it !

my own blog has information under the tag "hellenic polytheism" ( i'll tag it on this post so you can easily find it ) but i beg you to find information for yourself as well ! one resource i'd suggest is theoi.com !

i am not someone who has never been religious. i was raised as a muslim and upon becoming an ex muslim apostate, i converted to hellenism almost immediately. i would love if hellenic polytheists who were once atheists or agnostics would add onto this post to provide some advice that i personally cannot, but for now, here is a very brief, very quick crash course:

do not follow the expectations of tumblr or social media. tiktok especially is rampant with misinformation, and while tumblr is slightly better, i still don't believe you should be getting all your information from here. one good, trustworthy blog for information is @/theic-manic, because they site their sources a lot. however, at the end of the day, your practice is your own. just because a god presents one way to one person and a different way to you does not mean you're doing anything wrong! ( i.e, Apollo may present Himself to someone else as a stern mentor, but for me He's a whimsical father figure. and that is okay! )

most of us do not believe the myths actually happened. do not fall for mythic literalism. the myths were created by humans and they don't say anything about the gods themselves ( cough cough Zeus haters cough cough ) however they can be helpful in practice. ( i.e, offering hyacinths to Apollo because of Hyacinthus )

okay, repeat after me. the gods. will not. get angry at you. for little things. the gods will not get angry at you for little things !!! they are beings that are eons old, with wisdom and knowledge we can't even imagine. they are above getting offended. it's very difficult to offend the gods, especially the hellenic gods. however, this does not mean you insult them. just have a basic line of respect and you'll be okay. unless you happen to murder somebody abd spill the blood on their altar, you'll be fine.

you don't need an altar to practice! i myself don't have one currently! especially because it's not safe for me right now. the gods will understand.

the base line of hellenism is kharis, which is the act of give-and-take. you give the gods offerings, and they give you their presence and blessings in your life. please do know that the gods don't have to give you anything in return for offerings or devotion, and if you don't see them in your life right away then it is okay. they also won't be angry at you if you don't give them offerings for a while. there's also different types of offerings! my primary way of giving offerings is food offerings and devotional acts. please do note that you cannot eat food offerings you offer to chthonic deities ( deities involved with the underworld ), so if you need to consume the food offerings like i do, then you're unfortunately limited to ouranic deities ( examples of chthonic deities would be Hypnos , Hades , Persephone , Kharon , etc . examples of ouranic would be Zeus , Apollo , Poseidon , Aphrodite , etc ! ). you can also offer prayers! devotional acts are things you do in the name of a deity that relates to their domains, so for example, sitting in the sun for Apollo or learning a new language for Hermes.

as long as you're doing your best, the gods literally don't care how often you worship.

know the difference between devotee and worshipper! devotees are like upgraded worshippers essentially.

do as much research as you can, but also practice!

i really wish you the best , if you have any other questions that you'd like me to go more in-depth on , my ask box is open !

[ashmp3]

What designers do you want to see jeonghan wear/etc?

when u start reading this u will understand the despair i felt when tumblr deleted my reply (just as i was finishing the margiela part) But we live… so okay i must warn you this is long and i made collages bc there was way too many pictures i wanted to show… One thing about me i don’t like to half ass things so i really hope you enjoy reading all this 🫶🏻 (this is one of my favorite questions i got asked EVER)

I wanted to start off with Jolo (Jeonghan solo) first just because i have that on my pinterest saved and Ready. You know i envision kind of fallen angel (1004) for one concept and venusian otherworldly beautiful man that it makes you uneasy for the other concept? Okay so first one some of the inspiration (versace ss02, mugler 84, givenchy (by mcqueen) haute couture 1997, mcqueen fw 06, blumarine ss24)

Second one i just think simone rocha all over… it would fit his whimsical looking ass…And this JPG look with the pearls AND the givenchy all white beauty just yes… Oh i adore.

Now let’s get into the Real Question. Need to make it clear that the fashion houses i mention are the ones i love (for myself aka it’s my taste aka the fits you see I ALSO WANT) so yes it’s biased a bit but i do always keep a tab on jeonghan so this is not something i just came up with… TRUST!

first of all i need to start with YSL (i just saw his ig story. Please) bc i BELIEVE that they will make him their muse. i just feel it in my intuitive soul and mind…. Anyway i already posted some looks i want to see him but it doesn’t hurt to get reminded. Sidenote i REALLY need to see him become part of snowflake community (i’m the president ofc) i just need to see him in a pretty šubara it is my right as his slavic woman…

peter do. I need him to hit up jeonghan… it’s possible like jeno walked for him can he please hop over to hybe i have a perfect person in mind…..

alexander mcqueen… that’s kinda a no brainer you know how much i love structured, sleek design of course i would love jeonghan in them too… Imagine his tiny waist in these just magnificent if you ask me…. And the little bunny bag. don’t even get me started on that i have ZERO words

now i know he is a very cozy man and likes his outfits to be baggy so much that you don’t even see his body. May i present him with some yohji yamamoto in my opinion he would rock everything AND would feel cozy and comfy like he does in his giant hoodies. Going with the cozy (bc i am afraid i will go over the picture limit) i have to (lump them together) and mention margiela - i am actually surprised i haven’t seen any svt man in tabis but there is still time 🫣 With that ofc comes early 00s hermes which is my favorite… (i didn’t post my f/w fits here bc i had other blog but i will this year and u will see what i’m talking about)

mugler… Let me not repeat myself the pictures can talk for themselves and in this case (bc again i got over the 10 pic limit) i gotta group him them with gucci (by tom ford it’s given) so we are talking maybe fw 96 with velvet suits or 1995 … Actually 1995 fits so well bc he is 95 baby okay okay SEE connections…. I need to be his stylist he would look so cunt.

i think schiaparelli would be good on him (manifesting. again if i could just have a word with his stylist.)

Had to delete anne demeulemeester paragraph i am sorry but this next collage was more important so it was a fight and anne lost. ANYWAY I would LOVE to see him in custom dilara findikoglu like imagine it says jeonghan dangling… similar to this i would love for him to have a todd oldham shirt with his name like nadja does here (a big cozy shirt bc he’s so difficult abt it…) This egonlab outfit i adore i had it saved i think it would suit him perfectly. and this haider ackermann leather wrap coat. and this vivianne westwood winter hat. and this 2123 shirts. And i think i should stop now before someone euthanizes me!

This got SO long i could talk about this for ages and i am sorry if this was all over the place i would make a powerpoint presentation if i had time. but i need to stop myself from exhibiting signs of mental illness on my dear blog. But i hope this was fun to read… I hope 🫶🏻

[shadesofecclescakes]

Once you get this, you have to say five things you like about yourself, publicly. Then you have to send this to ten of your favorite followers (non-negotiable, positivity is cool~)🌈🌈

Um, ok, I both love and resent you for this ask lol

I had to get through a whole bottle of wine to do this

Why is it so hard to say nice things about ourselves? I waxed poetic about the nails of the woman who sold me this wine for what felt like five minutes (here's a link to what they kinda looked like. So fucking COOL. DRAGON NAILS)

but it's taken me multiple days to come up with five things I like about myself. Crazy.

Ok. Here goes:

I like my voice. I used to hate it. Thought it was "too deep and manly for a woman". Now I think fuck that. It's unique. And soothing. And a little bit smooth.

I like that I am TALL and BIG and BROAD and hard to miss. I spent a lot of my life trying to hide and be smaller and more "feminine" (whatever the hell that even means) and now, if people want to notice me I say go for it. I'll give you something to notice (even if that means someone calls me "brave" for wearing a bright yellow bikini)

I also like that I can get SO passionate about things. I feel like most people on Tumblr really feel me on this one. Most of my life I was made to feel like I was weird for how into things (books, movies tv shows etc) I got but it led me here to this website full of amazing talented people who are similarly inspired and seem to feel the same way about things that I do and that is just so fucking cool. Every single one of you is so goddamn amazing. Even if you're like me and all you do is re-blog other peoples' fan content incessantly. Hell yeah to you for keeping the fandom going!

I like that I have kept my child-like wonder over the years. I'm 39 and people still refer to me as "whimsical" and I fucking love it.

I love that people seem to feel safe around me. I've been told this more than once and I think it's the best compliment I have ever received.

I hope you realize this is coming right back to your inbox. So if you already posted 5 get ready to think up five more my friend!

[miidia]

Hi Tumblr. It has been a hot minute. I've missed you a lot. I spend more time on Pinterest and Tik Tok these days... things have changed quite a bit.

Anyway, this is my first attempt at starting a blog. I have chosen the temporary title of 'miidia' as a pun/portmanteau of Mii and media. Do ya get it? 'Cause it's me (mii, à la Nintendo Wii) and the media that has made, is making, and continues to make me. Pretty easy concept, right?

Let's start with an easy one. Here's an album I come back to for a few months each year like clockwork. The place where it all began, folks. Kero Kero Bonito's first 2013 mixtape, Intro Bonito. What a masterpiece. This isn't an album review; I'm just here to appreciate. Where to even begin... I've been to two KKB concerts. At my first, I got a trucker hat and a t-shirt. I have both to this day.

I digress; so many of the tracks on this album are so iconic, it's hard to pick the standouts. "My Party" is intensely difficult to leave out of this discussion. I'm having a party / Everyone can come. What's not to like? Cake and jelly and ice cream / Enough for everyone. I'm drooling. Seriously. In my mind, this is a children's birthday party. Bright colors, sweet treats, silly music... What's noticeably absent? Drugs, alcohol, the escape from stress for which a party is supposedly for... Why is it that kids seem to have more fun at their parties than we do as adults? Don't we better understand the value of recreation and free time with how stressful our lives are? One day, I am going to have the adult version of this birthday party. Vanilla and chocolate cakes with rainbow sprinkles and cute frosting messages. Rainbow decorations, table cloths, silly treats, silly music... silliness all around.

The afterglow is inevitable. On "I'd Rather Sleep", KKB hits a nerve. The tempo and instrumentals are fun, whimsical, silly... everything our party should be. The lyrics are a bit different. KKB has had a few tracks from their earlier days go viral on Tik Tok as sounds far after their release. This is one such track. It was dutifully coopted by the 'liminal space' and 'backrooms' edit community, conjuring themes of dissociation, obsession with nostalgia and adolescence, and an all around bizarre dream state. This is a disquieting yet pleasant place.

Intro Bonito is a very spacial album. It feels like a structure to be explored, climbed, discovered, lost, and re-discovered.

I have more to say, as I always will, but I think this is a enough for now. A good starting place, I guess.

Until next time,

Goose

[shevee-the-word-wielder]

Creature of Soul Matter: The Emotion in Heart

Chapter 1: Found

Next ->

I apologize for awkward spacing, it's normally good but Tumblr has some weird spacing in of itself.

Creature of Soul Matter: The Emotion in Heart AO3

Nothing.

A nothing unrecognizable until now.

A nothing that existed for so long but all of it without memory… until now.

A something outside, a lightless glow, a something that makes the nothing

recognizable.

It draws nearer.

It sparks sensation in... me.

I can feel again,

Emotion,

Memories,

… thoughts.

The nothing now me from the inside and out.

The something is moving.

It has a likeness to me.

It is nearly me.

Some closer.

I can feel it now.

It's not a something but a someone.

They have thoughts and emotions like what I now do.

I can sense their soul, it destroys the most outer nothing and I can recognize where I might be.

I'm in something, a soul forcefully put in one not ment to hold it.

I remember names. If they were allies, enemies… friends, I can't remember.

Gartihall,

Maniluce,

Plaige,

Tearories,

Galacta Knight,

Many others come to me…

But finally, Fecto Elfilis.

The creature draws ever so nearer.

I am Elfilis, I am a thing that used to exist outside this nameless prison. I had a body, I had thoughts, I had emotions, I had…  I have regrets.

The soul comes closer.

It recognizes me, it sees me, it knows me, it wants to come to me.

…

It's right next to me. The outside world now there. It's looking down on me. I am within a blade; a small, crescent shaped blade. It's black as deep space and lined with a white aura.

It picks me up, I feel their… his, thoughts.

He's looking at me curiously, "what are you?" He says in his mind.

I am unable to see him, only feel his soul, the sensation blocking his visibility…

"I have a better question. Who are you?" I respond.

He jumps a bit.

I can hear again.

"Elfilin!!" A cheery, high voice calls.

"Oh! Uh, Kirby!" Elfilin calls back. "I found this super weird blade!"

A pink little blob approaches, happiness just radiating off of him.

"Oooooo!" Kirby's interest is peeked.

"And it talked to me when I picked it up! It was really weird…"

Kirby gasps, "Can I see can I see?!" He begs.

"Oh o- okay." Elfilin stutters.

No! "Don't give me to him! You still have to expla-!" I'm cut off as Kirby gains hold of the blade.

"Ooooo." He's awestruck as he turns me around. "CAN YOU HEAR ME!?" he screams at me, mouth wide open. "CAN YOU TALK TO ME TOO?!"

I'm dazed, "can you not yell at me like that?" I try.

Kirby doesn't hear me. "Ohhh… the sword doesn't want to speak with me…" he mumbles, disappointed.

"Can I see it again?" Elfilin asks.

Kirby hands me back to Elfilin.

"Please don't do that again…" I say once I'm in his hands again.

"Oh, so I guess you can only talk to me?" He thinks.

I hear a call from down the hall.

"Kirby! Elfilin!"

Both of them turn to the entrance as someone walks up to it. "There you two are!" He has a deep, fun voice. There's a lot of authority behind it, yet with a whimsical, child like feel.

"Dedede!" Kirby yells as he runs over and hops onto the large penguin's stomach. "Look what we found look what we found!" He gleefully says.

He hops down, grabs Dedede's hand and starts pulling him towards us.

Elfilin holds me up for Dedede to examine.

"This is a cool lookin' blade! That's for sure!" He seems slightly confused, "nice find you two!"

"It's not just cool looking, I think it's alive." Elfilin explains to him. Dedede's confusion growing.

There's a new voice, "alive?" It says in it's deep, sturdy voice.

Dedede turns around, "oh! Meta Knight! Come over here and take a look at this!" He gestures to me.

Meta Knight looks similar to Kirby but dark blue with a mask and cape. He flies over… and apparently he has wings.

"Would you mind if I see?" He politely asks Elfilin.

"Oh uh, sure."

Fine Elfilin, I guess I'm a gemstone with no value in piles of rubble, ment to be shown to everyone.

Elfilin hands me to Meta Knight. He closely examines me, his yellow eyes squinting.

"Oh there you guys are!" Someone calls from the hall.

"Bandee!" Kirby gleefully cheers as someone runs over to us.

"Bandee, Meta Knight, Dedede, Kirby and Elfilin… quite the crew!" I try to think to Meta Knight.

Meta Knight sighs, "I'm sorry, but I don't think your blade speaks." He apologies as he hands me back to Elfilin.

Elfilin lightly sighs, "yeah, I figured, I think it only speaks to me…"

"Hmm, well we should be on our way. We still have plenty of more places to visit." Meta Knight says.

Elfilin doesn't respond, instead he studies me with careful intent. I get a chance to properly look at his eyes. It seems like an entire galaxy floats around in them, completely blue.

"What are you, little creature?" I ask.

He responds with a thought, "Well, I'm not entirely sure, it's probably too complicated for right now. Do you know what you are?"

"Perhaps, but it's best to not say until I'm certain."

He sighs.

"Come on Elfilin!" Dedede calls from the entrance. "If you plan on bringing your new toy, don't hurt anyone with it!"

"Okay, I'm coming!" He calls back.

"Please don't leave me. I've been stuck in a prison of nothing, not even thoughts, for an unknown amount of time. This is the first time I've been able to think for who knows how long!" I plead before he can even move.

"Okay okay, I'll bring you along." He complies.

He flies down the hall, silently humming to himself. A dark buzzing comes from his mind, something I faintly recognize in myself, though in a less complete form than his… trauma?

He pulls me in close once we go into another hall. I can tell what he looks like now, with his big ears and head, with some small limbs. And most of all, he's cyan, a color that sparks memory of myself.

I think I realize something, "Elfilin, you have a likeness to me that none others have had, you can communicate with me while others fail to do so. You may be my way out of this… Can you help me?"

He thinks for a second, "I don't know if I can, but I guess I could try…"

I sigh, "Thank you. Even if nothing works, thank you for trying."

He pulls me in a little closer, basically hugging the hilt. I can get a better look at his soul now and it seems… incomplete. Far from it actually, he seems to be the piece of an incomplete something else.

I try to think about this, but I'm too distracted by the overwhelming positivity and at the same time negativity of his seemingly broken soul.

I sigh, giving up. "Good luck." I say to him before letting myself rest.

[mask131]

A guide to face Tumblidiots (0)

Being on Tumblr is a very interesting experiment. Fascinating, interesting, challenging - certainly not a pleasant one.

Given the fact that I never fully side with one extreme or another, I ended up, throughout the years, on various subjects, as the target of contradictory attacks by random people who just came to me in chat, notes and reblogs.

Because I am interesting in the history of Christianity, in stuff such as the seven deadly sins, in folk-Christianity and angel lore and all that, people call me a religious Christian fanatic. Because I am interested in the devil and witchcraft and speak of devil and heresies, I am called a God-hated devil-worshiper.

Because I speak against antisemitism and dislike it, I was called a whiny Jew. When I say I am not Jew, I'm being told I am just a dirty propagandist. When I say I am French, people come to me explaining why I am responsible for the French colonies, and for the slavery under Napoleone's empire.

When I say I am into guys, I am called a sinful queer or shameless homosexual ; but when I say I'm asexual, I am not queer enough and I'm just a straight in disguise.

Because I hate the extreme-left, people call me "right-wing". Because I hate the extreme-right, I am called a leftist.

Ultimately I don't care much anymore because the good thing when you are accused of being so many contradictory things at once, or of being responsible for world atrocities just because I was born in a given country or speak a given language, is that you end up realizing - I don't need to give a crap anymore because no matter what I am going to say or do, somebody is going to be displeased and come after me. And Tumblr is filled with idiots. [I know a lot of you will have had this experience on Tumblr, even if you're not French - no matter the nationality, the sexuality, the age, someone is always coming at you somewhere, at one point or another.]

Or "Tumblidiots" as I'm going to call them. Apparently, this is the fashion on Tumblr to make puns and neologism using "Tumblr", and since I am talking about a despairing subject, better make it more whimsical in the presentation.

But why would I put into a same bag homophobes and the worst "woke-caricatures", extreme right and extreme left, fanatical religious and the most hardcore atheists? Because, as it turns out, they all behave the same way.

You see, one of my weaknesses is that I refuse to block people straight away when they come at me with insults or stupid words or hostile behaviors. I saw a post on Tumblr evoking how you should never debate with someone who holds a morally wrong position or a politically dangerous one, because they are using debates as a tool to make you doubt your position and endoctrinate you. I do not agree with such a position: if you want to live in a democracy, you need to debate. Debate is a manifestation of people's rights to say their ideas, of the ideal of a world where everybody can talk and discuss on equal footing, and it is just a basic social tool. A society with no debate is a return to the absolutist monarchies and their censorships. So while I do agree that in the end, to be able to survive the cesspool that is Internet where every vile minority can make themselves sound like a legion or a horde, one needs to block the most harmful, idiotic and dangerous people - just blocking everyone on sight is useless, because you shield yourself away from the threats to the point of ignoring its existence ; and because you also potentially shield people on the wrong side of the barrier from coming up onto a more normal, a saner or a less harmful discourse that could make them nuance their opinions in turn.

Digressing a bit here - but all of that to say that I always talk to these people first, open a dialogue (since they reached out to me), try to see if there isn't a case of misinterpretation or wrong first impressions. I always give a chance to people that look like violent brutes or mindless hateful sheeps because I trust in the fact that other people are in fact intelligent, reasonable, sensible beings that can talk rationally and logically of actual facts and respect personal convictions. But often I find myself disappointed upon realizing the talks I have is entirely illogical - worse, since I try to act logical and reasonable when they do not, the situation always ends up with me being trapped.

And given it happened many times, on both sides of every spectrum possible, and given it happened to me at a young age (since I started Tumblr as a teen, as a lot of people do), I found myself trapped more than once. But I always managed to not get devoured or chewed up for one simple reason: in real-life, I had personal experience of narcissistic, gaslighting, manipulative people ; and I helped people who were in cases of emotional abuse, and I was a testimony to sly and perverse bullying techniques. The result is simple: I could immediately see these same tactics and traits in the Tumblidiots discourse, and thus immediately identify them as coming with a very negative and very harmful intentions. That they want it or not - because here's what is so infuriating with Tumblidiots. Some are actually clever, manipulative people who use of these sly techniques on purpose - but they're a minority. Most Tumblidiots are ACTUAL idiots who simply repeat and recreate the same processes, attacks and discreet abuse actual bullies and fanatics and perverse do on a regularly basis.

Try to explain that to someone who doesn't even understand that what they are doing is wrong not because of the opinion they have but of the way they do things... Given these people rarely want to consider any other angle of attack to any question or any other sides to a given story ; since in their minds the world is not made of nuances but of big blocks of colors that can't possibly fit with each other and can't be broken with anything else but a hammer...

And so, years and years of experience on Tumblr decided me on opening this little guide.

It is not a guide to defeat the Tumblidiots - no, if I knew how to do that, I would already be slaying these little, squirming, toothless, acid-spitting, slimy pseudo-dragons. I unfortunately do not know how to change a Tumblidiot's mind so they act more considerate or reasonable, and I do not know how to defeat once and for all someone who is hellbent on spreading misinformation or attacking people on the slightest and most superficial cues.

But they all, no matter their goal or side, they all use the same techniques, the same methods, the same words. And this is what this guide will be about: identify these common tactics, identify these techniques, how they are put into place, what they entail. So that, when you face one Tumblidiot, you'll be prepared. You'll be ready. It won't help you defeat the slimy mind-beast, nor will it soften the blow, nor will it appease you in front of the most infuriating stupidity - but at least you'll be able to clearly see what is going on, and to not let them suddenly think you are a worthless piece of non-human being who is lying to themselves and shouldn't be who they are.

[joeywheelermyman]

Second Prison Text

This one is super short. And I have some words at the end. I was surprised by how easily tears came to my eyes. I didn’t plan on crying, it just happened. I haven’t cried since my birthday last year, yesterday was the first time in four months. Everyone is starting to quit caring about [friend’s name], if they haven’t already. How unfair that is. Rydina told me “Nathaniel really misses you.” And I really didn’t expect that. It was so great to hear them, almost the whole group. Everyone was so happy, it was like old time. For context, I wrote this on the day of the Superbowl, I called a friend and they were with the rest of my little group and I got a chance to speak to all of them. But anyways, I’m surprised by the amount of negative replies I got from my original post. I thought people would be more understanding, but this is the internet, right? So fuck ‘em. I thank everyone that said something super nice and positive. They were reassuring to find scattered throughout the negativity. I plan on continuing my posts as I think sharing them, several of which, by the way, turn to things other than my life at the time and just become whimsical writings, will help me feel better about talking about it. I began seeing a therapist a little while ago for those who recommended it. Also someone brought up a point that I should have put a trigger warning on my post and I would like to apologize for not doing so. I’ll make sure to do that on any future papers that contain information about it. In parting, I would like to add that anyone who does not like the fact that I am sharing what happened to me and the things I went through, you don’t have to read what I post. I got a lot of people saying I shouldn’t have blazed it and I want to apologize for that, too. I have no idea how Tumblr works, just the reputation behind it. I won’t be doing that in the future. I had the exact amount of money in my bank account that the price was and I thought it was a sign from The Universe that I should share my papers. I’m also thinking about changing the names of people in the papers to respect their privacy and safety.