#also. work. killing myself
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
sigh. i should . get a job soon huh
#bangs my head against a wall#the only thing i’m worried about is like . theatre things and my family takes so many vacations#also. work. killing myself
0 notes
Text
sry i have chronic only draws megumi disorder the doctor said it's terminal :/
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#fushiguro megumi#megumi fushiguro#fanart#jjk fanart#megumi#me: 'i like yuuji and megumi Equally :)' also me:#i cant help it hes so fun to draW hes so easy to draw i love you i love you i love youuuuuu#also this is kiiind of me making good on that poll i did forever ago saying id draw catboys . so as promised here is A Catboy :3#hes sooooo meowmeow hes so gd CUTE god i love . fushiguro mEGUMI#to b fair i Do like yuuji and megu equally ffgsdjfdjh#sometimes u just gotta spend the whole entire day fully rendering what was supposed to be a megu sketch sheet#but now it is . just a char sheet by talos this cant keep happening#this all started bc i still want to practice/tweak the way i draw faces but it would appear i cannot control myself#also been loving drawing the cat megumi plush gddff fushiguro mewgumi is my favourite animal crossing villager#anyway so much for working on speed this was a fun 10 hours#its ok . i do it fr him <3 geto voice i dont mind being killed by you
6K notes
·
View notes
Text
I fucking HATE them.
Click for Quality!
#they make me want to kill things with my teeth and hands#also more of my human bill design you will see more of him#I’m probably gonna get the book of bill tomorrow so I’ll soon start being abnormal about its contents too#aria draws#digital art#digital drawing#fanart#gravity falls#bill cipher#stanford pines#human bill cipher#billford#bill x ford#I love toxic (soon to be old man) yaoi#I need to eat drywall I need to slam my head into a wall#nest time I’m at work I’m crawling into that trash compactor just to relieve myself of the illness#they’re in my fucking head I need to kill them both#toxic yaoi#yayyyyy
569 notes
·
View notes
Text
Come read Trigun, they said. It'll be fun, they said.
#trigun#fanart#vashwood#wolfwood your head angle was killing me#still not quite how I imagined but it works#I'm also joking#nobody pushed me to read Trigun#I did all of that to myself#trigun stampede#wolfwood#vash#nicholas d. wolfwood#vash the stampede
3K notes
·
View notes
Text
I met the me who made different choices
#idk what this means so dont ask#got the words stuck in my head and this is what I wanted to draw for it immediately#me at my desk. so.#I dont look exactly like this obviously. doesnt matter. anyways#hard time recently in a lot of different ways#lots of work to do!#given up on getting everything done I kind of failed at that. it was too much#so now I'm just trying to get anything done that will make the next 6 months not kill me again#ideally. 3 episodes. or the book#or like at least close enough to that that its basically that#I'm feeling really screwed LOL#I dont know how I've been working every day for so long and still havent done enough...#(its because the work load is way too much)#every time I take 1 hour for myself. to cook. or clean. or draw something else. or play a game. I feel so guilty auauau#I hate webtoon I hate this damn green app...#DOESNT MATTER!!!#what DOES matter is my art is good as hell... look at this shit...#the light. the colors. I love you red I love you green#I need to get more red pants I only have the one pair.#I saw this guy with red pants that had skeleton legs on them and I was like FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!! I need them!!!!#I need to start sewing again. I dont have a sewing machine cause my apartment is too small so I havent sewn in years but I really want to..#I want to make clothes again... I need some vests I need some dresses..#I will not make pants or sleeved shirts because I dont hate myself#sketch#art#vent art I guess LMFAO its not#its just this fun little thing we like to call self expression#also this isnt how my desk setup actually is I scooted things around cause I didnt wanna draw anything twice. fuck it we ball#ok back to work
148 notes
·
View notes
Text
local silly girl tries to learn something new, dozens injured
(this caption could refer to Claire or myself and it would still generally apply)
#SLARPG#super lesbian animal rpg#claire higsby#fun fact: this is the first traditional piece I've inked in at least 3 years#(it is also the one i was working on at that wedding i mentioned)#it's been fun to shake the rust off and push myself to work traditionally here and there when i have some time to kill#anyways i wanna colour this traditionally too but I'm posting this now in case i lose motivation or mess something up#furry art#witch#taffy art
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
RAIDEN OH NO! AMV (YOUTUBE)
#metal gear solid#metal gear solid 2#raiden#raiden mgs#metal gear rising#metal gear rising revengeance#metal gear solid 4#mgs#amv#i think this one is good. i think its better than the last one bc i thought that kill v maim is kinda boringgg#for the record for the last one i was like i should make a kill v maim amv.. for raiden bc hes my favoriteee#and then i was like ach nae it would disrespect his character arc... (hadnt played mgs4 or mgrr yet just mgs2)#well guess who would fit kill v maim apparently according to the writers (SCREAMS LOUDLY)#i like this song better though always have always will and its more iconic and it does fit him in every way though Soooo we still win#anyways im sorry to the raiden/rosemary nation the majority of whom is MYSELF for reversing that shot LOL#i would make a wholeeeee raiden/rosemary amv if i had enough footage. but i dont.#also theres another mgs2 amv in the works btwww
110 notes
·
View notes
Text
ARE YOU FOR FUCKING REAL
#thinking out loud 🏵️#honkai star rail#WE WERE SO CLOSE#OH MY GOD#ARE YOU KIDDING ME#IM GOING TO KILL MYSELF#WE COULDVE HAD IT ALL#GODODOHSGIOOHIDSFHIDSFOHSDFIJODSFHIO#IM GOING TO BASH MY HEAD INTO THE WALL#before anyone comes after me. if you want. i will write a whole ass essay on how stellaron hunter sunday works.#i will do it.#LIKE HEAR ME OUTUTUTUT#yes ae sunday also works BUT THE POTENTIAL OF SH SUNDAY#IM GOING TO CLAW MY EYES OUT#INHALE EXHALES
104 notes
·
View notes
Text
I'm at the brink of a suicidal breakdown. I've been waiting to get my paycheck from an illustration job I've done last October 2023, I did ask them about it and said that I would get paid on the 27th. It's the 28th and I still don't see any updates on my end. I've gotten my hopes up for so long, every month since and I've burnt the fuck out from waiting.
I've been refraining myself from eating and buy myself stuff like food and toiletries and I've completely ran out of money to survive. I wish i could accept commissions but I haven't been doing great mental and physical wise and I don't have the means to draw other than a few sketches to cheer myself up. I'm completely burnt out.
If you could help spread this around I would appreciate it, every bit helps at least to cover my necessities for a while until I hope to eventually get paid
I'm sorry for asking for donations so frequently I just can't hold on for much longer in this state
Donations and reblogs are appreciated, thank you
#personal#i hate asking for help but the other option rn for my depressed ass is to kill myself and no one wants that#i just dont understand why its taking so long. i already was told ill be paid at the 22nd but then after waiting through the whole weekend#they tell me its supposed to be on the 27th. it was a typo#now its the 28th and i dont even see it#am i really gonna get paid. this is souring my experience working here. i do have a project to work on but all i can think of is dying#my sister helped me out a bit but she cant even do much bc she got out of surgery a few weeks ago and doesnt earn much#she also has rent and gas to cover for her new job#mads if youre reading this thank you for helping me at that low point when she got into the hospital. i owe you so much already#i feel indebted
167 notes
·
View notes
Text
Subtweeting Rob as a joke. for the lolz. why does he see it, know it’s about him, delete his tweet, and then quote mine like he’s literally oomf.
#killing myself#i’m just at work#shitposting to do something#…dots#rob mcelhenney#also i was being weird in the replies of the freaks in my replies#hope he doesn’t read those tweets LOL#OC
113 notes
·
View notes
Text
I'm not sure either I've said this here before edit I think Vaggie would be really good with kids
Like, in heaven, she'd get dragged to the park by a kid and either dogpiled in hugs, made to play hide and seek, or they'd insist on her telling them stories
I can see it staring cause she took a nap in the grass not realizing it was a field children often came to and made up a story of fighting a fish monster when they asked about her spear
And then a kid recognized her, dragged her to the park, and every time she left the barracks, there was a 78% chance that she'd get dragged into the kids' game or need for entertainment
Heaven can get boring with it being the same thing! Vaggie was new and always had new stories(she's making them up on the fly she has no idea why these kids like her so much but doesn't want them yo be disappointed)
She can't bring herself to know cause their so fucking tiny and cute and if she or soembody else makes them cry she'll actually kill somebody she swears to god-
If she had walked around when they went to heaven a kid would've recognized her immediately and zipped over crying and asking where she's been and that'd result in her getting dragged away and Charlie standing by very confused, but taking pictures cause this is adorable as fuck
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel au#hazbins fallen au#but works for canon/any au#universal headcanon for my au#hazbin hotel vaggie#hazbin hotel charlie#chaggie#but barely#children!#vaggie looks grumpy but she is WEAK for kids#has the mentalof 'if i make these children sad i will kill everybody in this room and then myself'#she is frozen when shes given a baby/toddler to gold for the first time#she does not want to drop them and looks rigged as hell but the child is sleeping safely#so its okay#chaggily#and#hazbin hotel emily#implied due to au tag#lutes the complete oppisite#just looks at a kid and they start cryingcl cause she looks scary. especially with blood on her#i also dont think lute would be to fond of them. she woudlnt hate them but wouldnt actively interact on her own accord
98 notes
·
View notes
Text
AND I MET THE CHANGE GOD TOO. OKAY. COOL OKAY
#I WASNT EVEN MEANING TO SO I ACCIDENTALLY SKIPPED THE DIALOGUE BEFORE I KNEW WHAT WAS HAPPENING FUCK#ill go and find it later if only to give myself peace of mind. BUT WOW. WHAT THE FUCK#my original plan was to 1) work my way to the king and talk to him 2) doom myself and take everyone down with me 3) loop back to floor 3#so i can visit the observatory and scrounge for any lore. although since i got killed that run siffrin asked the king to kill him first#which was intereresting. but i decided to have all doors unlocked that time around so i can just get the starcrest and go#but for some reason it wasnt working so i went to get the keyknife since i was already there and completely forgot i already had it#from the previous loop and THATS what triggered it. IT WAS FUNNY BUT ALSO SCARY BUT ALSO I THINK I GET WHAT THEY MEAN#about siffrin going back without actually changing. going along with a script even if his feelings on things change#the same way he has his own small rituals like the carving thing and does it for constancy. reassurance or safety even#and the times when he breaks script and ends horribly like the sadness attacking thing and bonnie yelling at him cause him to loop#to avoid it. although i cant really say anything bc id probably do the same thing. maybe not for the same reasons since im cruel#and make him do the worst to see what will happen since i put curiosity over rejection sensitivity as an observer and player but well.#i feel wrongfooted bringing it up since i dont have it myself but i have to wonder if this kind of leans into ocd tendencies.. i remember#reading something about how ocd is fuelled by fear. and things like counting and rituals are kind of used to cope with that?#if anyone knows anything more or talked abt it already id be really interested in hearing it bc im almost sure im not#the first to come to this conclusion. but i simply dont know enough nor have the confidence to broach the topic rn esp with how often#misconceptions around ocd get casually passed around so its hard for me to know what is and isnt a baseless assumption#puppy plays isat#in stars and time#isat#playthru#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#isat act 3 spoilers#change god#WHAT WAS THAT WITH WEARING LOOPS FACE THOUGH WHAT THE FUCKKK
51 notes
·
View notes
Text
hal whos actually really stressed about his mortality, not in a 'i didnt godtier' way but in a 'if the body i worked so hard to get gets any kind of injured it'll fuck me up emotionally for 3 months at the VERY least' kind of stressed
#our t#his relationship with tangebility and carbon-based existence feels.... delicate. to say the least#dirk is also stressed abt it but in a different way#in a 'if he gets hurt i'll actually kill everyone around me and then myself' kind of way LMAO#its Not Good they need couples therapy and individual therapy fuckin stat#but they wont look into it cause they both think they can do it themselves#like bros self-therapy only works if youre open to actively challenging urself & ur thoughts/urges#and not just trying to cut them outta you [1 million facepalms]
52 notes
·
View notes
Text
wdym you won’t bounce on it, i called you bunny, didn’t i?? SO BOUNCE LIL BUNNY!! GOOOOOO
#eff yaps#thinking about her riding me but then getting all pouty and bratty and refusing to move any more#ugh!!! in those cute fucking bunny ears too?? kill me dead rn#i feel like i can get her to correct her brattiness in like. 4 seconds max. maybe#so this would probably work#also a really hard slap to her ass#EEHHHH actually maybe her pretty face too#or a firm grip around her throat or on her cheeks smushing em togetherrhbfnnrnrhj FUCK#what am i !!! doing to myself !!!!!!!!!#like an hour ago i was about to start begging to be bullied into subspace#COS I WANNNTTTT ITTTTT >;|#but here we are
41 notes
·
View notes
Note
how come you don't draw the ppl / characters you have the hots for
there's a certain kind of artist that can do that... a better type of artist................. and an artist who can stand to look at the reference material for more than a few seconds at a time.
#i can't look at someone i'm TRULY attracted to for very long before needing to basically walk it off and this is not a joke#but also there are a few Types of artists and one of them is the type where most of the work is self portraiture#or like. self adjacent. hence all the art. of. fat women. that i make. sort of more of my likeness#but also if you do a bad job drawing someone you think is hot then it's sort of like well. maybe i should consider killing myself#sergle answers#sometimes you don't want to. BESMIRCH. something that you like. by not doing it justice when you draw it#weird coming from me bc I used to draw EXCLUSIVELY fanart but also I wasn't thinking about it that hard at the time
126 notes
·
View notes
Text
smth smth about 'the thing that the character did that you thought was rly rly funny in the moment is actually linked to a terrible trauma that lies within said character.' or wahtever.
#jrwi show#jrwi fanart#jrwi riptide#gillion tidestrider#made this within a short span of wahtever bc i gotta go up to the mountains for my stupid gay job tonight n im trying#nnot to frrRREAAAK THE FUCK OUUTTTTTTi dont wanna work but. get that bread we fuckin shall i guess#ONWARDS TO THE FISH TORMENT!! sometimes flowers feel pain when you trim them before their blossoming. atleast i imagine so#i used to draw gillion with loooong hair tied into a big ol braid. and then it was confirmed that he had short hair when he was little.#AT FIRST I WAS SAD. but then i realized the duality of. when they were little. gill had short hair. edyn had long hair.#AND NOW THEYRE OLDER. and gillion has long hair. and edyn has short hair#both mirroring eachother. looking up to eachother. subconsciously or not. they most certainly care. and most certainly miss eachother.#GILLION ALWAYS LOVED HOW LONG HAIR LOOKs. atleast i imagine so. he hasnt cut it since he left the undersea. sure he wanted to go back home#but even at the very start. he knew he was free in some way now. free to grow out his hair. an adventure would await him before he returns.#he knew it would be a while. so he cant let this go. he cant let this sought-after hair-length get cut away from him again#not yet. not yet. i like to think he loved music too. I SAW SOMETHING INTERESTING A BIT AGO#i see alot of ppl commenting on my baby gill comics like;'i wouldFIGHT this teacher i wanna KILL EM i want them DESTROYED#all very good and nice sentiments! i LOVE the energy here! and it would be nice. to have that catharsis#but the story of young tidestrider is not a story of catharsis. it is a story of agony and being so so small and so special and also so dum#and sucking so bad. and just being a kid and doing the things that a little kid does and so many tired tired people reacting badly to it#youre supposed to be the hero that will save us. our world hangs in the balance and you are the one who tips the scales.#YOU are supposed to SAVE US!! you NEED to SAVE US! CAN YOU PLEASE STOP SQUIRMING IN YOUR STUPID CHAIR!!#you'd think that young tidestrider ought to prevail. and be tucked someplace all safe and sound.#elders gone missing and rotting in a jail. their cultists nowhere around. but theres no happy endings. not here not now.#this tale is all sorrows n woes. you may dream that justice n peace win the day. but thats not how this story goes#BIG ideas for this lil baby gillion series. if anything i make ever gets disproven im killing myself in a well as to poison a water supply
100 notes
·
View notes