#also with on specific fan (i think more individuals may have spoken up too) she used him for unpaid labor

[loving-jack-kelly]

@dream-rot literallyyyyy

i'm racking my brain for any apology video worse and idk if there has been one. like. you know it's bad when shane fucking dawson addressed more of his controversy than you. jesus christ ma'am. jesus christ.

okay so one of my toxic traits is that I keep up with internet drama like crazy like youtube drama is a favorite pastime of mine and I didn't know an """"""apology"""""" video could be as bad as what colleen ballinger just posted. lmao.

[argumentl]

The Freedom of Expression, radio version - Ep 24, March 2016 - 5th Anniversary of 3/11, Human canvass artwork, Kyo hayfever, Actress childless by choice, Celeb Instagram spat.

Kaoru starts this episode by commenting that that it was the 5th anniversary of the 2011 March 11th earthquake and tsunami. Joe says that as well as visiting the destroyed nuclear reactor, he also spent time in Fukushima. He says that 5 years is a turning point for residents, because this is the point at which government financial grants run out. After this, the residents must support themselves. Having spoken to the locals, Joe says that even if support were to continue, it may not be efficient. The more time passes, the more difficult it gets to know if the support is getting to where it is really required. Locals have compained about the number of volunteers, for example. They don't need that many now. Additionally, there are many people in the area, especially the elderly, who really do need help, but who tend to shoulder their load alone, rather than reach out. For example, people who require help with transportation to hospitals etc. These people are not asking for money, which makes it difficult to know how to help. Kaoru stresses that no matter how many years pass, this disaster must never be forgotten.

Kaoru's topic of interest this time is the British artist Eliza Bennett and her work 'A Woman's Work is Never Done'. In this work Bennett used her own palm as a canvass to stitch in coloured thread, and it has recieved a lot of attention, some quite harsh. Joe asks Kaoru what he thinks about this. Kaoru says he's not entirely sure, but it seems like it wouldn't be possible without some kind of painful trigger, and she may have let it go too far. It looks almost like a highly-evolved prank. But at the same time, he's pretty impressed by it. The thought of sewing thread into your own hand is pretty shocking to him. He says that because of what he's done to his own body (tattoos), he is in no place to tell others what to do with theirs, but still, this makes him uneasy.

Next they are joined by Dobashi for the Tokyo Sports corner. Dobashi asks them both how they are managing with hayfever. Joe says he is fine. Kaoru says he usually suffers a bit just at the start of hayfever season, but after that he is ok. Dobashi says he has been trying out pollen desensitization therapy, and is nervous to see if it will actually work during Spring. Kaoru says that Kyo has tried the same thing. Having hayfever during lives is pretty annoying for him. Dobashi asks whether Kyo ever sneezes during lives. Kaoru doesn't think he does, but then again, maybe he does when he turns his back to the audience.

Dobashi's first news story is that the actress Yamaguchi Tomoko had done an interview for the womans' magazine 'Frau' in which she stated very clearly that she never wants to become a mother. Many of the magazine's readers agreed with her, making this a big talking point in the media. Dobashi says from one perspective anyone is free do as they please, and there is nothing really wrong with this decision, but on the other hand, Japan is facing a population crisis. Who will support the elderly in years to come? Should it be a responsibility to have children? Kaoru states also very clearly that this should totally be up to the individual to decide freely. He asks if anything happened to Yamaguchi in her childhood to influence her outlook. Dobashi says, her parents divorced when she was 6, her little sister was raised by her mother, and she was raised by her father. So she probably does not put much faith in the idea of a conventional family. She probably doesn't feel the need to have children, and feels happy without them. Kaoru agrees with this. Joe says that people have a right to be happy without being classed as a statistic in the declining population. People should not face this issue with indifference - it does need serious thought, but at the same time lifestyle choices should be respected. Kaoru then brings up the problem of the aging population, specifically recent news of over-stressed care workers abusing residents in care homes. What are they doing there? They knew what the job would involve. He feels quite strongly about this, but stops himself before he gets carried away with it.

Dobashi's next story is that the singer Oshio Manabu (formally convicted and imprisioned for drugs offenses) had posted a photo on Instagram of himself with his arms round the shoulder of soccer player Kashiwagi Yosuke. Kashiwagi had subsequently spoken out to the effect that, 'He's not my friend, I barely know him'. Oshio had then tweeted 'You liar!', or words to that effect. Dobashi says Kashiwagi is probably under pressure from the soccer association to distance himself from such dubious individuals if he wants to gain a more prominent image in Japanese soccer. Kaoru thinks this is pretty interesting, and wonders whether these guys are actually friends. No one seems to really know, but they look pretty chummy on the photo. They probably weren't the closest of pals though. Kaoru thinks they should have been more straightforward with each other if that was the case. Dobashi says he once caught up with Oshio in Narita Airport, while Oshio was on his was to Hawaii. At the time, he was dating actress Yada Akiko, but his management didn't approve of the relationship, which meant he could be fired if he persisted with it. Dobashi interrogated him about whether he was going to choose 'love' or 'Liv' (the name of his band). Oshio apparently laughed loudly at this. Kaoru thinks Oshio seems like an interesting guy, although he has never met him. He thinks sponsers are probably behind the pressure being put on Kashiwagi to deny association with Oshio. He says it looks kinda cute, seeing Oshio trying to up his image by posing with a J-league player.

To finish, Kaoru reads out some messages from  listeners stating that despite many other fans saying they want some solo material from Kaoru, they do not want him to start a solo project, they think he is just fine in Dir en grey. Kaoru says he hasn't even announced any solo plans! But when he sees so many message with such strong feelings towards Dir en grey, he feels happy. Dir en grey is too busy, and song writing takes up enough of his time anyway.

[helkiedustballs]

Mental Illness and the Horror Genre

An exploratory essay by Emma L. Gilbert

The relationship between horror media and mental illness is messy, and on many occasions outright screwed up. Today, I’m going to take you through various examples of horror films that utilize mental illnesses and disabilities, often as a central theme, and examine how exactly mental illness is used to benefit the tone of each film, and how some of them may or may not use it in a distasteful fashion.

Without further ado, here we go!

“Psycho” is the earliest film I know of at the moment that utilizes mental illness explicitly as a sort of evil or “villain”. The big reveal is that the character Norman Bates’s late mother developed as another personality inside his head which, very clearly, resembles Dissociative Identity Disorder (we will actually be talking about DID more than once today, as it appears to be the most common mental condition used in horror movies next to psychosis or schizophrenia).

I can only assume in the time of “Psycho’s” release, this portrayal was considered anything but realistic to general audiences (The term “psycho” is even considered a slur nowadays by a fair few mental health experts and activists). Mentally ill individuals were but a disturbed fantasy in the minds of the public, and in many ways they still are.

In more modern times, mental illnesses on the “scarier” side (like DID) are seldom understood or spoken about, and this makes them a very easy target to use as driving scare factors in horror films. We fear what we don’t understand, we know this, we’re talking about it a lot nowadays, but movies similar to “Psycho” that use such things as plot material for their stories still get made so carelessly.

Let’s dive into another example more thoroughly:

 “Midsommar” is a 2019 horror film directed by Ari Aster, the man behind “Hereditary” (which we will also be discussing). I know a lot of people love this movie, just like people love “Psycho”. It won just about every award from Fangoria’s 2020 “Chainsaw Awards”, which are completely fan influenced. But it completely missed the mark for me because of a couple instances involving disabilities. And while these instances are miniscule, it’s the fact that they are so miniscule, so “tossed in”, that bothers me.

My first problem begins at the start of the movie. We open with our lead fretting over an ominous email sent to her by her mentally ill sister, which is all well and good. But the ultimate result of this situation is that she was right to be worried, as her sister had hooked herself up to a car exhaust pipe which she used to poison herself and their parents, resulting in the death of all three.

This is… extreme. And while it’s absolutely okay to be extreme (I’m one of those horror fans that enjoys a little extremity), it’s peculiar, and yet not so peculiar, to have it alongside the aspect of the opening I’m about to explain.

The illness of the sister character is specifically labeled as bipolar disorder. Why is this specifically a problem for me? Mentally ill people can be dangerous, that’s an indisputable fact. But I’m gonna pause “Midsommar” here, because it’s a good time to shift over to a movie that I believe suffers the same problem.

 “Split”, both in the title movie and in the ensemble “Glass”, refers to anti-hero Kevin Crumb’s disorder as Dissociative Identity Disorder (there it is again!). This was a problem since the very conception of the first film, because it’s doing that thing where a mental disorder is used explicitly to make the villain of a horror film scarier. And while the character of Kevin isn’t ultimately seen as evil, the film still misconstrues many things about DID in order to keep its creep factor (like, people don’t wind up with evil alter egos who kidnap and kill people in a cult-like fashion, and people with DID do not go through extreme physical altercations when different personalities take the front).

This was many folks’ first introduction to the very concept of DID, just like back in the 60s with “Psycho”, and the movie does little to deter the audience from taking what they are seeing as factual. It really drives home the fact that Kevin has this disorder that is real, using that perceived realism to enforce the horror of its story. It uses a lot of typical “professional” imagery and dialogue, such as namedropping the disorder and having the character attend a therapist regularly on-screen. These things in film tend to equate in the general ignorant public’s mind to something bordering on or outright factual. While I choose to believe most people recognize the easy potential for illegitimacy in fictional movies, I still notice, even in myself, how further research is seldom enacted, and the information granted by that movie remains present in the back of our minds.

I’m not trying to say this is entirely the fault of the team behind “Split”, because I believe people should be responsible for recognizing that not everything they see is true, no matter how legit it looks. But the fact is that people are stupid and do take stuff like this as fact whether they realize it or not, and I think that filmmakers and storytellers should hold a little responsibility for making sure their highly fictionalized portrayals of real things (especially real people) don’t get taken as hard fact. Easy resources for understanding complex mental conditions are not popular enough or offered enough to garner the public’s attention; I’m sure someone would rather watch “Split” instead of reading a textbook on DID studies.

 All that being said, let’s go back to “Midsommar”. The mention of bipolar disorder is a one-time occurrence, but it still sticks out to me; both because I noticed a trend in Aster’s films of using mental illness explicitly (like I said, “Hereditary” comes later), and that this diagnosis is used at the ultimate expense of the sister.

Throughout the movie, Terri (the sister) is seen as a scary, taunting ghost through Dani (the lead)’s eyes. She is only ever depicted as that terrifying last picture of her, with tubes taped to her mouth and their parents beside her. She also seems to be looking right at Dani in these sequences, too, if I’m remembering correctly. It’s a fearful memory; her sister is a villain.

Using a disorder described as a “mental disorder that causes unusual shifts in mood, energy, activity levels, concentration, and ability to carry out daily tasks” to tie to a character that was unhinged enough to plug herself into a car exhaust pipe to kill herself and her family seems… like a reach, to me, at least. She would’ve had to plan that out- it takes serious dedication, supplies, thought, and time to pull that off. Bipolar people can be prone to sudden outbursts, not necessarily to planning and executing an intricate double homicide/suicide.

What I’m trying to say is that there’s no way bipolar disorder was the sole cause here. There were clearly more “things” she had going on, but the only thing they say is that she’s bipolar, therefore suggesting that is the reason behind what she did, and then treat her like a vengeful ghost the rest of the movie.

There is perfectly good reason for Dani to see her sister as something sinister, though. Literally the only aspect of this plot point that messes it up for me is that we have a “diagnosis”. It doesn’t feel right to me to use such a common and non-extreme illness for the sake of being like “ooh check this out, this is a real mental illness and mentally ill people do bad stuff sometimes, look at that! Look!” It’s lame, and unkind, and, like “Split”, borders on irresponsible. It’s times like this where a character’s mental condition could use a little more ambiguity, especially when it’s literally never brought up again. It’s so nonchalant, so careless, and that’s what bothers me.

Now, I’m gonna move away from mental illness alone for a hot second and explore how “Midsommar” treats its other disabled character.

“Midsommar” depicts an explicitly inbred character with a facial deformity named Ruben who lives with the Swedish cult and is treated like a sort of “higher being”. They are clearly treated with care, but through the gaze of the American characters, we see them as off-putting. And, again, this framing makes sense, as Ruben was purposefully conceived through incest because of some misguided religious belief that disabled people are closer to clarity.

But, stop; what is this portrayal doing, again? It is doing that thing where it uses a disabled character to give us the creeps. And this is made worse when Ruben goes on to kill and skin one of the American characters, and then wear his face as a mask.

Okay, listen. It’s wrong of the cult to purposefully bring a very physically and mentally challenged individual into the world for religious reasons, but that’s not relevant to my point. Yeah, it’s weird, but people like that character are real- and, no matter how they came to be, they’re here now. Why are we always looking at these people with pity or fear, and normalizing that reaction? It can be jarring to see someone who looks like that, sure, but they’re a person, and should be treated like one.

Oh, and not to mention having Ruben wear the skinned face of a “normal” person is absolutely representative of wanting to “look like everybody else”, which is a screwed-up narrative especially when you’re using the disabled person as a straight-up monster. I get the whole “skin the fool” thing, that was funny, but did we have to do that? This is Ruben’s “normal”, and that’s not an awful thing.

Before we reach “Hereditary”, I’d like to say that the utilization of deformed people as killers and monsters in horror is, I think, arguably more prevalent and inescapable than the use of mental illness by itself. It’s present to a point where we just have to deal with it and the amount of irreplaceably iconic villains with facial deformities, but I’d like to believe that we can do better and move past that. Make a monster, not a person.

 Let’s get cracking on “Hereditary” now, which I think uses mental illness as a much more core aspect to its story than “Midsommar”. Again, Aster makes it clear out the gate that our evil character (the grandmother) was indeed mentally ill, and this is, again, used at the character’s expense.

Now, I wanna keep this short, because with how much I went off talking about “Split” and “Midsommar”, I think that what I find troublesome about a movie called “Hereditary” about a mentally ill cultist grandmother passing on her “lifestyle” to her family is rather obvious.

I mostly want to discuss the character of Charlie, because her portrayal is what bugs me the most. My gripe with her is that she is very obviously autistic, or something along those lines, which is framed as a creepy thing about her. She’s supposed to be some kind of “chosen one” that her grandmother wanted, and I guess this was grounds to have her be the “creepy one”. But this can be done without making the character blatantly mentally compromised (and before anyone comes for me, I’m autistic, and despite the many wonderful things about it, it also does hinder me from some basic things in life, so, yeah, it’s compromising). It’s just so tacky, uninspired, and tired.

In regards to other characters, we see Annie speak of how her grandmother suffered from mental conditions (I can’t recall whether or not one was specifically named), and then watch her exhibit various “scary” symptoms herself (trying to set her son on fire, etc.), which grow worse post-Charlie’s death as she is wracked with grief. Annie’s case isn’t quite as terrible as things such as “Split”, as she never actually does anything, only attempts and then snaps herself out of it (before the end of the movie where everything goes to hell, of course). My main problems, as mentioned, are with Charlie and the grandmother, mostly Charlie. I just wanted to attempt to cover all “Hereditary’s” portrayals at least briefly before moving on to my next subject.

 Now that I’m done being mad, let’s explore another recent horror film that uses mental illness as a core aspect.

“Daniel Isn’t Real” is a 2019 film by Adam Egypt Mortimer about a boy (Luke) who experiences a traumatic event as a young child, which he copes with by manifesting an imaginary friend named Daniel. Daniel doesn’t stick around, though, as he tricks Luke into poisoning his mother, almost killing her, and resulting in the two locking Daniel away.

It’s incredibly easy to decipher the, once again, use of DID symptoms. One could easily push this movie aside due to this fact, as clearly, the mental illness is used as the spooky horror thing again. But I’m of the belief that this film handles itself a little better than the likes of “Split”, and here’s why.

It’s a bad thing to use mental illness as your villain, unless you do it right, and there is a way to do that. Luke (the mentally ill person) isn’t the villain, Daniel (the mental illness symptom) is, just like Kevin isn’t “Split’s” villain, but the important difference is that, in “Daniel Isn’t Real”, the audience sympathizes realistically with Luke, doesn’t turn his illness into something extremely outlandish. In “Split”, the audience is following the heroine, who is terrified of the outside force that is Kevin and his personalities. “Split’s” DID is otherworldly and threatening. “Daniel Isn’t Real’s” DID is threatening, but something the audience and Luke hold hands through and fight together.

Aside from some muddy metaphorical aspects (assuming I’m reading it right) and the use of some racial stereotypes common in horror films, “Daniel Isn’t Real” is on the upper end of horror featuring mental illness.

It is also worth noting that there is actually a specific mental illness brought to attention in the film, schizophrenia, as Luke is seen reading a book about it once he starts realizing he’s losing control of Daniel. But this is merely a suggestion, as he doesn’t actually know what is going on in his head and we never get an official declaration of his condition. This brief clip pretty much only helped in solidifying my perception of the story as about mental illness first, and a demonic imaginary friend second. If you ask me, I think dissociative identity disorder fits more with the film than schizophrenia, but my knowledge on both of these disorders is relatively “bare basics”, so take that with a grain of salt. And besides, from this point on I’m going to be looking at the portrayal mainly as an undefined trauma induced condition.

I view Daniel as a visual representation of Luke’s mental condition. He is rude, and childish, and malicious, nothing like who Luke is, who wants nothing more than to get rid of him. Mental illness can feel like there is some evil thing in your brain telling you awful things and threatening your existence, and Daniel represents this feeling perfectly.

Going even deeper, the movie opens with a shooter entering a small café and massacring multiple patrons and themself. One of the things that causes Daniel to manifest is Luke, having left his home where his parents are shouting at one another non-stop, coming face to face with the dead shooter. It is later revealed that Daniel, an ancient demonic “imaginary friend”, was inhabiting the shooter at the time, thus making him the cause of the massacre. And he chose Luke as his next host on that fateful day.

Pause now. We’ve got a blatant mental illness metaphor, and it’s the direct cause of a murder. Why am I more lenient on this and hard on things like “Midsommar”? It’s because this detail plays into what I view as a very interesting interpretation of mental conditions and their preceding trauma.

Looking past Daniel being a demon, I see this as the shooter struggling with the same or a similar type of mental condition caused by a past trauma. This person was sick, as all terrorists of this breed are. Again, this narrative is helped by the fact that we are following Luke and not someone on the outside of his problem, and therefor understand the real lack of control had by anyone Daniel (A.K.A. mental illness) has touched, and, more importantly, the helplessness they feel.

Am I saying people who enact gun violence are partially innocent and have no free will? No, that’s stupid. The real point of me bringing this up is simply that I find it interesting how the film looks at trauma as sort of a contagion. Hurt people can hurt people, and traumatized people can traumatize people. Whatever “demons” that killer hosted were passed on to Luke- and, if the film wanted to go for a broader subject and ditch the singular evil imaginary friend concept, passed onto many others, too. But, it didn’t, and I think that works best, as symptoms like Daniel typically only manifest in young children, assuming you wanna go with the DID/schizophrenia reading, which is what the film offers to us.

We see experiences and fears felt by everyone who has mental illnesses portrayed visually in “Daniel Isn’t Real”, sometimes feeling like a mixed bag of different symptoms from different mental conditions. I see myself and my own experiences in Luke, and it feels good to see the mentally ill person as the hero, and the mental illness being at least mainly a threat to the mentally ill person rather than the outside world, which is how it is more often than not.

And while the movie ends on a sad note, actually quite similar to Kevin’s end in “Glass”, what it does with its runtime is, for the most part, what I want to see more of in terms of mental illness in horror.

 Like I said at the beginning, we’re an easy target. Autistic, obsessive compulsive, anxious, depressed people like me are scary when you have no idea what you’re looking at. Yes, we can be dangerous sometimes, but to nobody more than ourselves. But much more than dangerous, we’re scary to ourselves.

I’ve lived in terror for long periods of time before due to my mental illnesses, and I’ve had this thought; “why doesn’t someone make a horror movie where the mentally ill person is the protagonist, and the mental illness is the monster?” “Daniel Isn’t Real” executed this idea almost perfectly, if not for the fact that Daniel was out to hurt other people, because what’s scarier than a person with a realistic mental condition hurting other people? Ooooo.

Living with mental illness can feel like a horror movie all on its own. The horror is in my head, and I can’t kill it, only keep it at bay, control it. And I think that is scarier than any Norman Bates, than any Kevin Crumb, than any Ruben. To live with a force in your head that wants nothing more than you for to be in misery is a horrific reality worse than any killer.

And before I close, I want to comment on one more little detail. I’m much more critical on recent movies that work with this subject matter than I am on older movies; that’s why I had so much to say about the Aster films and “Split” and so little about “Psycho”. This is because I understand how invisible the very concept of mental illness was in everyday society in “Psycho’s” time. It wasn’t just an easy target, it was a given, and nobody writing these films had any idea of what they were doing or the seedling of thought to look into it. It was that alien.

Today, we are talking about mental illness so much, and yet we are still so careless with what we use it for in our media. It is blasphemous to me that directors and writers still insist on using mentally ill people as villains and creepy characters. Mental illness is such a complex experience that deserves to be explored from the viewpoint of those of us who live with it, not as a toy for the bigshot horror director of the hour to toss around like a hot potato.

There was an excuse in the 1960s. There is no excuse now. We can do better.

[jamestaylorswift]

The Archer - Analysis

I was nudged to write out my thoughts about “The Archer” and I’m honestly glad for the push. This song is so beautiful yet haunting. I don’t see people appreciating it as much as I think it should be appreciated.

Standard disclaimer that this is my own personal reading of the song. You are free to disagree with any or all of what I say. There are many good interpretations of this song out there. It helps that it’s a very evocative track 5!

This analysis is not short. Sorry.

——

Combat, I’m ready for combat

I say I don’t want that, but what if I do?

‘Cause cruelty wins in the movies

I’ve got a hundred thrown-out speeches I almost said to you

——

Unlike other tracks on Lover, there’s no concrete imagery such as a garden gate or prom dress in this song. Taylor is sharing what only exists in her mind. This is a story told purely with metaphors. It’s important to lean into them.

The purpose of the first verse is to contextualize the rest of the song. She introduces the idea of being torn about wanting a fight. She would only want to fight someone if she has a really good reason to do so. Her driving force is “cruelty winning in the movies.” Her thrown-out speeches are the thing that would start the fight. Tossing the speeches implies that she is unsure not of the content of the speeches but of entering the fray of battle that would ensue after delivering them.

It’s very hard for me to see these speeches as anything but coming out speeches. Coming out (even as a non-celebrity) is often stressful. Cruelty winning in the movies is a nod to the fact that mainstream media depicts LGBTQ characters meeting tragic ends. Taylor, as a wildly famous celebrity, has cultural influence. Her coming out would impact the culture; it could change the endings of those movies. But her impact would only be measurable years in the future. 

This verse is also where she first addresses the “you” in the song. I think the “you” is essentially a random observer/everyday Joe Schmoe. It’s nobody in particular because it could be anybody. The only thing remarkable about “you” is that she’s directly addressing them. That makes this story personal.

——

Easy they come, easy they go

I jump from the train, I ride off alone

I never grew up, it’s getting so old

Help me hold onto you

——

If the “you” in this song is a random person who has some benign preexisting opinion (whatever that may be, including a non-opinion) about Taylor Swift, then the “they” refers to arbitrary people who are on the fan/hate train. “They” come and go easily and represent flux in interest in her. I read the metaphor about a train with momentum as the implication that general interest in Taylor waxes and wanes but is inherently self-sustaining because of her celebrity. In this song, “they” aren’t necessarily the enemy like the public was, for example, in reputation. She just doesn’t concern herself with “them” anymore. It’s the “you” who has her full attention and who is sticking around to hear the story.

Finally, we get the first of many “help me hold onto you”s. This one is her articulating why she’s telling this story in the first place. It’s “I want you listen to this story and try to understand.” It’s “help me,” but in a chill way.

——

I’ve been the archer

I’ve been the prey

Who could ever leave me, darling?

But who could stay?

——

The archer is the zodiac symbol for Sagittarius, the centaur, Taylor’s astrological sign. Taylor exists in parts, just like a centaur: she is part her celebrity persona and part her real self, an amalgamation who is a Taylor different than either of the constituent halves. To the “you” it’s Taylor in her purest form. It’s impossible to completely separate her celebrity from her person at this point.

The chorus is about the duality of Taylor’s being, her actions, and others’ investment in any part of her. As the archer (hunter) she has aggressively exercised control over her public persona. As the prey (hunted) she has been a passive victim chewed up and spit out by the public/industry/etc. for things outside of her control. Sometimes it is her own actions that drive people away or attract people to her. Sometimes it is by individual choice that people board or leave the train.

The archer, Sagittarius, is also symbolic of a prophet who can predict fate. The prey is a victim of a terrible fate that, by nature, cannot be changed. I prefer to think of the archer/prey metaphor as commentary about the duality of fate rather than intense combat (for which a bow and arrow would probably be insufficient). This song is Taylor trying to reconcile the certainty of her future with distress about the unknown consequences of present-time decisions.

(Note that this first chorus is where the bass drum beat starts. It represents anxiety about the future. The first part of the song is exposition. The drum only comes in when she starts worrying about the “what ifs.”)

——

Dark side, I search for your dark side

But what if I’m alright, right, right, right here?

And I cut off my nose just to spite my face

Then I hate my reflection for years and years

——

Nobody Joe Schmoe has no obvious reason to hate Taylor for anything that she just said. But Taylor knows what comes next in the story. She’s anxious about Joe Schmoe’s reaction to what she’s about to say.

Taylor admits to doing self-destructive things. Because of the context she provided at the beginning of the song, I believe this is a reference to staying closeted. The “reflection” could be the literal reflection of her now-noseless face. Hating it is pure personal regret for self-destructive actions. The “reflection” could also be the mirror which her fans/the public hold up to her. Her self-destructive choices manifest in others’ toxicity. Hating what they’ve become starts with hating the ways she enables that behavior. (It’s really both “reflections.” The duality of man, yadda, yadda, yadda…)

More important than blaming herself for any (*cough*) past decisions, she articulates the pain of being in the closet in two simple lines. Burying a significant part of yourself by hiding behind a carefully constructed lie is exhausting. It’s sad. It also provides protection and safety and it’s unfortunately all too common. Cruelty wins in the movies, thus people are cruel to themselves.

——

I wake in the night, I pace like a ghost

The room is on fire, invisible smoke

And all of my heroes die all alone

Help me hold onto you

——

I think people consistently underestimate just how morbid “The Archer” is. Taylor reveals that her prophetic future is death—specifically, becoming a ghost, thus leaving an imperceptible trace of herself. She already feels suffocated by that possibility. Her suffering is invisible. She might just be left to die a slow, agonizing death via asphyxiation. Worse yet, what happens afterwards? Asphyxiation from invisible smoke would make it seem like she just dropped dead of her own accord. Or if the smoke somehow became visible….well, if you could see a ghost in the first place, a smoke-filled room would make that impossible. The implications are staggering and they’re all sad.

Few, if any, of Taylor’s heroes have literally died alone. I’m going to go out on a short limb here and say that Taylor probably sees parts of herself in her heroes. Therefore, the “heroes” in a song supposedly about the dilemma of coming out are other famous people who were/still are closeted. Taylor identifies herself as a potential role model for the younger generation like her heroes are for her. Her heroes’ lonely metaphorical deaths are exactly what she fears. Dying alone is being in the closet indefinitely. It’s being misunderstood and not having any way to rectify that situation. Perhaps this song is about the mortifying ordeal of remaining unknown.

As evidenced by the invisible smoke in the room, she thinks her metaphorical death is certain and imminent. The “help me hold onto you” is now “help me,” but in a very unchill way.

——

‘Cause they see right through me

Can you see right through me

I see right through me

——

As a reminder, “they” = random people in the public and “you” = nice, ordinary Joe Schmoe whom she wishes could understand her predicament. Being see-through is being seen without substance. Therefore, what the bridge is not saying is “don’t you see how obvious it is, isn’t it wild that people don’t pick up on me and/or my lover being loud in public?” It is saying “I am literally a ghost to ‘them’ because ‘they’ look at me and don’t see any of this pain, I’m basically dead to myself too because I feel like I’m already doomed, you’re my last hope so please say you see me.” Who cares about reaping the benefits (love, adoration) from the mortifying ordeal of being known? At this point she’s pleading simply to be seen as herself. “I see right through me” is her worst fear. This is why this line breaks out of the bridge and bleeds into the surrounding choruses.

(The bridge, to me, is where it becomes clear that treating the “you” as her lover with whom she could come out does a serious disservice to the rest of the song. Her lover as “you” inverts the meaning of the bridge. This makes the story inconsistent. I appreciate the gravity of the “help me hold onto you” line if it were spoken to a secret lover. However, being seen/understood is more intimately tethered to being out as an individual than being out with another person. In my mind, it makes more sense for this attitude to be an invariant of the song.)

——

All the king’s horses, all the king’s men

Couldn’t put me together again

‘Cause all of my enemies started out friends

Help me hold onto you

——

The Humpty Dumpty rhyme is basically “anthropomorphized egg sits on top of a high wall, anthropomorphized egg falls off the wall and shatters irreparably.” Taylor as Humpty Dumpty makes the wall she’s on top of the pedestal of fame/success. She’s saying that coming out would topple her from her pedestal. Her image as a woman who became famous for writing heterosexual love songs is as fragile as an eggshell. When it breaks, what is left behind?

“All the king’s horses, all the king’s men” might be a reference to her fans whom she once considered as friends but whom can also be incredibly toxic. I read it as a catch-all for anyone who isn’t Taylor. The key of this verse is her musing on why an eggshell can’t be repaired. It’s not for lack of manpower. It’s that all the king’s horses and all the king’s men—everyone, literally—are enemies and don’t want to reconstruct Humpty Dumpty. They simply don’t believe Humpty’s death is so tragic that they would spend effort to change his fate.

Taylor fears that darling Joe Schmoe, a friend to whom she is addressing this story, could become an enemy by conscious choice. She can give Joe Schmoe the truth and plead to be seen, but Joe Schmoe can still choose to see right through her anyways. It’s terribly frightening to be honest yet have that vulnerability go unacknowledged. Taylor coming out is her facing the prospect of instant confirmation that good people do not care. She could die a ghost despite efforts to be visible.

——

Who could stay?

You could stay

Combat, I’m ready for combat

——

Coming out is a choice but being gay is not—it is fate. She has no control over how others react to that. Taylor slowly acknowledges throughout the song that her future isn’t in her hands. She ultimately shifts away from the prophet/victim binary by reiterating that she’s sure of herself and that whatever happens, she’s not going down without a fight.

Lover the album isn’t just about romantic love. This song is not construing an inherently unequal and sometimes toxic relationship with fans/the public as love. “The Archer” romanticizes the possibility of someone reacting to honesty with kindness and understanding. Love is being seen.

[ask-de-writer]

Genii’s Junk (1 part) – A tale of the Bizarre Borderland

Return to the Master Story Index

Return to the Bizarre Borderland

GENII’S JUNK

by

De Writer (Glen Ten-Eyck)

© 2014 by Glen Ten-Eyck

2581 words

Writing begun 06/19/14

From an idea by Alte Seely, who wondered what a Bizarre Borderland junk yard would be like.

All rights reserved. This document may not be copied or distributed on or to any medium or placed in any mass storage system except by the express written consent of the author.

//////////////

Copyright fair use rules for Tumblr users

Users of Tumblr.com are specifically granted the following rights. They may reblog the story. They may use the characters or original characters in my settings for fan fiction, fan art works, cosplay, or fan musical compositions, provided that such things are done without charge. I will allow those who do commission art works to charge for their images.

All sorts of fan activity including but not limited to art, stories, musical compositions, plays or anything else is ACTIVELY ENCOURAGED.

///////////////////////

There were a few old, gnarled trees out in front. The building itself was totally unremarkable. Just an old, cheap sheet metal structure. The peeling, sun-faded sign read “Genii’s Junk – Worth anything or not, I buy it or sell it. If you need it, I have it. But it may need work!”

I parked in the shade of one of the trees and strolled into the slight gloom of the cool interior. There were dozens of racks holding the multitude of things that Genii wanted to keep out of the weather. The sun in Border County is infamous for destroying anything that it shines on, if it shines long enough.

It had obviously not shone on Genii enough to do any harm! Lovely young looking lady. Appearances are deceiving. She is lovely enough to look at, yes. Young? Define your terms. I know for a fact that she helped to found the Ottoman Empire. Lady? Try calling her human if you want an earfull of excellent profanity without a single sleazy four letter word.

Like everyone in North or South America, if you trace back far enough, there are immigrants in the woodwork. Genii is one, sort of. She has been in the same location since at least 1530. That is the year, not the time on a 24 hour clock.

She told me herself that Cortez was one cranky customer.

Today, there was a slight individual with a large head hidden by a bigger hat at the counter. Genii had the oscilloscope and a big, hundred function multimeter out on the counter and three big power leads with clamps and adapters.

A long, too many jointed finger pointed at a stud on the device sitting on the counter. His (?) somewhat squeaky voice demanded, “Positive One go here! Not over there, stupid human!”

Genii’s lovely face curled into a snarl, showing her many fangs. “Watch who you call HUMAN, you gray trash!”

Settling some, she explained patiently, as if to a retarded three year old, “This is the anti-gee element of a 1942 Star Sweeper. From 1951 on, you are right. For any earlier models, if you want to do that test hookup, put your gold on the counter now. You will not be alive to give it to me later but you WILL have destroyed the unit.

“This is from one of the two that US Airforce took down outside of Roswell in 1947.” She turned to a LONG shelf of manuals and other books that sat on top of the massive number of scroll pigeon holes. Taking down a much thumbed manual, she expertly flipped through pages and pointed to a picture for the customer.

“There. Manufacturer’s Manual for the 1942 Star Sweeper. Hookup diagram and warnings…” The Gray examined the manual in something like shock.

“Where you get this? I give you two pound gold for it.”

With a sour expression Genii pointed over her shoulder at a sign in at least a hundred languages. One of them was the same as the one in the book. It read, “NO WRITTEN MATERIALS FOR SALE AT ANY PRICE!”

He (?) started to say something more, while trying to put the manual under his (?) coat. Genii, with a disgusted look, leaped over the counter like an acrobat. She hit the customer with both feet at shoulder level, flattening him (?). She took back the manual and hopped back across the counter to put it away.

She also took the device off the counter and lifted the oscilloscope back to its rack of test equipment.

The test leads and other gear went neatly back to their places. Brightening, she turned to me.

“What can I do for you today, Jimmy?”

Flipply I replied, “You could sell me your bottle, my dear, but I have heard a rumor that your personal home is not for sale.

“Actually, I was looking for a carpet. Something that isn’t a Belgian knock-off of a real carpet.”

Lighting up, she asked, “Hand loomed and knotted or machine made?”

“Hand knotted, I think, Genii.”

“What about a dubious one? I have one out on Aisle 34, about a four or five hundred yards down. I’ll loan you a yard wand to get you there. It is between the NC-2 and the De Haviland bomber. There is a rack there. I am sure that you will have no trouble finding it.

I snickered. “Anything on YOUR aircraft rows is fun. What do you have that is new to you?”

Genii grinned in delight. How about an X-B70? It needs a little work!”

I chortled, and asked, “Which aisle? I should have no trouble seeing a Valkyrie if it is anything like reassembled.”

Genii handed me a wooden pole with a wide bicycle type seat and handlebars on it. With a grin, she said, “Aisle 36! Have fun!”

Leaving the disgruntled Gray behind, I took the handlebars, activating the “Yard Stick” and took off. In only moments, I found the Aisle 34 marker and swooped around the turn, scooting down the Aisle.

The NC-2 was a great locator. The giant WW I sea-going biplane was totally intact. It had a 103 foot wingspan. For wood and wire technology there were few that ever matched its sheer size and NONE that could match it for range and load.

It was meant to launch in Maine and fly antisubmarine patrol all the way to the Florida keys, non-stop. The Great War ended before it and its three sister aircraft were finished.

Congress canceled the contract without payment. Curtis (the C of NC-2) went ahead and finished all four planes on their own dime, while Congressmen all got on the “They will never fly” and “defrauding the War Department” band wagons. When all four launched from the factory in Virginia and flew up to Maine, the world was astounded.

When they refueled, they took on as passengers those few Congressmen and Navy personnel still championing the NCs as practical aircraft. They then flew, non-stop to the Florida Keys, exactly as designed, except that they were carrying almost a 20% overload in passengers, instead of bombs and depth charges. That feat blew away the whole world at the time.

It also shut up the NC program critics more effectively than if they had been hit by the bombs that the planes were designed to carry. Congress quietly tried to pass Curtis the money that they were due, so that the US Navy could claim the aircraft.

Later, the four made a trans Atlantic Flight. The NC-1 disappeared in thunderstorms. Some wreckage was found. The NC-3 was forced down at sea. It was taxiing on only two engines when found. The tow to the Azores caused enough damage to the plane that it could not continue.

The NC-2 got to the Azores a day before the NC-4. It refueled. The weather being good, it took off for Lisbon and was never seen again. The NC-4 landed in the Azores, refueled and later landed safely in Lisbon harbor, the first airplane to fly the Atlantic. It is now in the Smithsonian Air and Space Museum.

I made a note to ask Genii how she managed to get the NC-2 and set my yardstick down by the rack of carpets. They followed that old law, 90% of everything is crap.

Genii, as usual, was right about it not being hard to find the one that she had spoken of. It had a clearly later, and phony, Antwerp label sewed on. The work had been carelessly done. The metal needle used to sew the label on had damaged the port side lift and control spells, unless my Pocket Dowse and Spell Strength meter was wrong. Judging by the fringe and warp damage, it must have been some crash.

As I rolled up the carpet and strapped it to the Yardstick, I heard a warning siren. It was coming from the vicinity of the X-B70, whose huge nose and forward canards jutted above the intervening aircraft.

No chance to look at it, then. I headed back in to the shop. I got there just before the unearthly scream of the six monster jet engines being fired up. It sounded like the X-B70 was a live bird. If Genii was going to that much trouble, she very likely had a cash customer for it. I wondered who it was.

Sometimes Genii would talk about customers and sometimes not. It was never wise to pry. There was someone new at the counter. The Gray was still there. Still complaining.

Genii turned her back on him and told him, “You are right. I did not sell to you. I will not sell to you. You tried to shoplift PRINTED MATERIAL from ME! I have not let any written things go since Caesar screwed up our deal and BURNED the Library at Alexandria! You have only seconds left to get out of here alive! Go!” She was reaching under the counter when the Gray left - - at a waddling run.

Turning to the new man at the counter, she smiled very professionally and asked, “Sorry about the scene, General. What can I do for the Air Force today?”

Self-importantly, he replied, “What was that? It sounded like a jet engine test!”

Serenely, which is a bad sign with Genii, because it means that she is absolutely certain of her legal footing, Genii replied, “It was. X B-70 engine test. Starboard #2 engine began to develop vibration, so we aborted the test.

“It is ALL covered in my salvage contract. Do you need a copy?”

Sourly, the General replied, “Why bother? You can’t sell it if it is operational. Mass weapon laws.”

Smiling with her fangs but not her lovely eyes, Genii replied, “Loophole big enough to fly a carpet through, General. If I am not selling it on Earth, the laws don’t apply. I am not selling it anywhere that you have any authority.”

Voice hardening and chilling some, like maybe a glacier, she asked, “Do you have any actual business here?”

“Where are those ten computer stabilization systems that we ordered!” More a demand than a question. Bad way to make points with Genii.

Her face froze. “I have been forced to cut off all credit to the United States Armed Services. Proper notices were sent according to the contract. The reason given is failure to render payment of the agreed form or amount. Further, the Military Procurement Office has sent formal notice of refusal to pay and stated that I will receive only 1/10th of the outstanding total and that only by a check drawn on the Government.

“This has totally canceled our contracts and agreements. I filed a notice of repossession for all of the following items.”

She fished out a file box and gave the thunderstruck general a list. She also handed him a file of correspondence.

“That file and notice are copies of the originals. You may keep them or return them. Neither you nor any other armed service gets anything until I have my gold on the counter.”

I will give the General this. He took the whole file and settled himself at a large table. He began at the front and started working though it. Soon he was on a cell phone.

I was walking beside the Yardstick, guiding it with the handlebars. I brought it up to the counter and asked, “Got a Merlin S-multimeter, Genii? I want to check this out pretty carefully. I am certain that this is a Second Caliphate carpet but as near as my Pocket Dowse can show, the counterfeit label was sewed in with an Iron or Steel needle.

“Looks like that caused the control failure that made it crash.” I shook my head at foolishness. “Can you believe knowing enough to get a carpet like this and then sewing in the phony label for tax dodging with a steel needle? It shorted or blew out all the port side lift and control spells.”

Genii grinned hugely which showed off her big fangs wonderfully. She hopped across the counter again. She had five different willow wands and a very well worn Merlin in her hands.

She helped me to unroll the carpet. I showed her the weave and fringe damage that led me to think that the carpet had collided with something pretty solid at high speed.

Genii nodded agreement and plugged the biggest of the wands into the Merlin. Between us, we made sure that the original starboard spells were all intact.

The port side was a total loss. Between that steel needle and the impact damage that distorted the weave, and with it the spells, it was going to have to be totally reworked from fringe to fringe.

She looked up, shaking her head. “I got this out of the Lord Carleton Estate. I just paid a flat fee for it all. I was pretty sure of what this was but that was a LOT of stuff to sort. Drove my Yard Imps nuts.

“I just set it over in aircraft and hoped for the best. You lucked out, Jimmy. This IS a genuine and restorable Second Caliphate. I already have it priced.

“Yours for only five ounces.” She grinned again. I may be weird but I like Genii’s grin, fangs and all. She was holding out her hand.

Like a true gentleman, I dropped in three one troy ounce Krugerands and two Chinese Pandas. Genii, being Genii, closed her hand about them. When she opened it, the coins were gone and a receipt was in their place. It looked for all the world like a magic trick. Which it was. Real. Not slight of hand.

With the General expostulating fiercely into his phone in the background, Genii helped me roll the carpet snugly and secure it with straps for transport.

Carpet over my shoulder, I walked to the door. Looking out, the Gray and a companion were going over my rig, big jumper cables in hand.  They were trailing down from the nearly antique Type A saucer hovering overhead,. They were trying to find the hookup points for a jump-start. One was gabbling in Gray, “No Anti-gravity! How it fly?”

Door partly open, I called back inside, “Genii! The Grays are trying to swipe my rig from your parking lot!”

Snaring her fiercest, Genii came barreling out past me. She had what looked like a shotgun in hand. The double boom sounded like a shotgun all right. The result was not your normal shot shell hit on the tough hull alloy of the Type A saucer overhead.

The blue fire blast was something to behold. A visible hole about a foot across started to trail smoke most impressively. The saucer tilted some and sailed across Genii’s Yard Fence. A few moments later the array of crashes and the crunch of failing metal announced the end of the saucer, and probably, some expensive junk. The Grays ran like rabbits while Genii was reloading. Definitely not normal shotgun ammo.

I stowed my find and climbed under the cloth sunshade of my rig and, taking out my control wand, lifted my old Mohgul Carpet and took off for home. As I flew, I reflected that if Genii had lost some junk in the crash, she had gained a whole, nearly intact Type A saucer for salvage. I think that she was going to come out ahead. As usual.

–THE END–

Return to the Master Story Index

Return to the Bizarre Borderland

[airlock]

alright folks, I’m back for more of those results from the anniversary poll; once again, I’ll be counting them as properly as I can because IS sure as hell can’t, and in the process, I will also judge whether the fans have spoken good choices

this time, we’ll be counting and criticizing the top 15 dancing duos! (disclaimer: I don’t dance. I still will attempt to comment on everyone else’s dancing)

#1: BERKUT & RINEA (9313 votes)

tumblr won’t let me simply put two images next to each other in a text post, and I can’t be fucked to put them together in such a way that doesn’t make them un-transparent, so I’ll be putting them together with a simple color background; it’s a spot uglier and I will probably fail to spot some wonky pixels, but c’est la vie

anyways, I don’t like it, but like Byleth before, this is a natural afk pick; they’re some of a very small subset of characters in the series that we actually see dancing with each other, in a proper cutscene. a cutscene that, in fact, basically exists to tell us that they look good dancing, so one’s not wrong to vote for them here, I suppose. there are, in fact, a lot of people in this world who are fantastic performers and also would throw their spouses in a fire if they figured it’d make them feel good about themselves again

#2: OLIVIA & INIGO (2474 votes, including Laslow)

this is actually sweet, though, mother-son dancing duo and all. one thing I do have to mention, though, is that you’d have to hope that our hypothetical dance-off was announced plenty of time in advance, there’s so much that could bring a performance between them crashing and burning if they don’t hash it all out for themselves first

#3: EDELGARD & DIMTIRI (1871 votes across all appearances, possibly with uncounted change)

they sure do look fantastic, dancing with other people with their backs completely to each other,

might as well stuff this strangely popular nothing-of-a-choice with a little additional note: these paired votes are going to be especially harrowing on the split vote front, because any combination of two characters who both have split votes means they can be combined with each other in 4 different ways. like, most people probably won’t combine, say, someone’s PoR self with someone else’s RD self, but properly unsplitting votes in this is going to be a lot more of a challenge. and that’s to say nothing of byleth; there is a whopping 16 different ways to combine Byleth and any one Three Houses character

ETA: I. completely forgot about the thing where edelgard tried to teach dimitri to dance when they were young. okay, that kind of tracks. but also like, whomst the fuck got the idea that whatever they were doing there was building up to elegance

#4: ELIWOOD & NINIAN (1495 votes)

I’m getting the lingering feeling that this fandom is a lot better at pointing out good dancers than good teachers-

this one’s another amazing pick; sure, not one you have to think a lot about, since they’re oft-shipped and one of them is an actual dancer -- but the beauty of it is that even the ostensible weak link still has much offer, between his flawless elegance and a love of dancing that we at the very least knows is in his lineage

let’s just hope eliwood would still prefer to keep the “special dances” private though-

#5: BYLETH & CLAUDE (1163 votes across all appearances, possibly with uncounted change)

speaking of the ballroom cutscene again, man, Claude sure has left an impression on us all back there-

still, we don’t actually see the dance, and it’s probably better that we don’t -- I wouldn’t bet that Byleth is any more expressive with their moves than they are with their face. there’s really not very much of a reason to vote for this other than wanting to insert yourself into a situation where one dances with Claude. and I mean, mood, but let’s focus, please-

#6: OLIVIA & AZURA (996 votes)

this is just a copout, though. this is like if I asked you about the best food in your town and you just told me that technically Gordon Ramsey was born there. ooo, hot take alert, two unrelated professional performers can probably put on a decent performance together!

at least their theme colors together make the trans flag, so I’ll give all 996 of you that much-

#7: ALM & CELICA (990 votes)

was there like an actual thing where they dance, or were people picking this just because they’re good-looking and married? because like, in the absence of evidence, I cannot and will not assume that Alm is a remotely passable dancer.

in fact, here’s the drill: for this section, I can’t actually blame people if they’re just hornyvoting -- being hot is kind of a point-plus for this -- but I can and will blame them if they’re voting for their ships with no regard as to whether they’d look good dancing. so, accusations of hornyvoting shall make way -- to accusations of shipvoting! I believe that’s also going to happen on the other paired category, even if that one is a lot less about the chemistry (presumably)

#8: NILS & NINIAN (884 votes)

this kind of a copout again, but it’s also a family dance again, BUT most importantly one of these two is not actually a dancer. like, sure, he plays the flute, but this isn’t a flute-and-dance duo poll, it’s a dance poll! although I mean, it does mean he must have a good notion of rhythm, and from the sprites we can definitely tell he’s got a spring in his step when he plays, and Ninian can teach him too, so... maybe? oh well, it’d be cute to see them try

#9: SIGURD & DEIRDRE (790 votes)

eh, I’m gonna call shipvoting on this one too. like, sure, they’re both hot and they’re in love with each other, but even if you leave aside the likelihood that Deirdre was raised too shelthered to have danced like ever, any dancing they’d know of would be totally incompatible, considering their entirely distinct backgrounds.

I suppose I will lend credence to the idea that Sigurd’s at least experienced as far as dancers go; it’s not like he was studying back at that academy,

#10: BYLETH & EDELGARD (735 votes across all appearances, possibly with uncounted change)

since most of the votes on this are for post-timeskip edelgard, this appears to be unrelated to the ballroom scene, for once

that said, I can’t think of anything to this other than regular shipvoting -- and not even shipvoting of much quality, because besides the above-mentioned on whether byleth can dance, I have a nagging feeling that the kind of dancing Edelgard would genuinely be interested in would be strictly for fun, without any sort of elegance or other things that an outside participant would enjoy watching

#11: TSUBASA & CAEDA & KIRIA & THARJA (687 votes)

don’t let the fact that I found a transparent tsubasa but not a transparent kiria distract you from the absolute trainwreck that resulted from the naming scheme used in FEH for TMS#FE characters crashing into the notation I’m using for the duos here- ahem, well, please be distracted from both of those things, anyway

assuming this is just between the two mirage users and we’re not talking about the most awkward foursome in history, well... I once again have not played TMS#FE, so uh, they sure are both pop idols and I think people ship them, I guess?

#12: MARTH & CAEDA (596 votes across all appearances)

I mean... there’s a lot that can be said about their individual qualities and their dynamics, but I have absolutely no idea how any of it would translate into a ballroom. and if we’re any inclined to believe that skill with words and skill with bodily expression tend to be opposite skillsets, then theyyyy are both screwed.

#13: PENT & LOUISE (508 votes)

I get it, I do. they both look sparkly beautiful and haute and classy and like everything around them is prettier for them being there. but let me categorically tell you that neither of these two dance.

neither of these two dance because one, Pent is an absolute potato, and two, Pent specifically chose Louise because she didn’t try to impress him with a dance.

#14: SAUL & DOROTHY (495 votes)

regardless of any merits they may or may not have, this is 100% just to get them into heroes, isn’t it. alright, I can respect that

but as for whether they can dance... sure, maybe? Dorothy is full of hidden talents, and Saul has probably tried to dance enough times to guide her along at least

#15: CORRIN & AZURA (476 votes across all genders)

alas, there’s no way this can work out, because we all know corrin has two left feet.

thank you, thank you! I’ll be here every night!

HONORABLE MENTIONS (highest vote in their continuity, without reaching top 15)

Ike & Soren (344 votes across all appearances): disappointingly, of the stark few Tellius pairs that got on this list, the best-ranked of them is 100% blatant shipvoting. I mean, sure, Ike’s got moves, but Soren?? at least vote Ike & Ranulf you cowards

Eirika & Ephraim (323 votes): first, we’d have to extensively train Ephraim on how to not make this experience entirely embarassing for Eirika, but that can be said of most anything they could do together in public-

Triandra & Plumeria (280 votes): yep, still unfunny. and now all of you 280 assholes are stretching it

Ferdinand & Lorenz (95 votes, possibly with uncounted change): I’m just mentioning them because I’m one of these 95 people. and so should more of you have been! don’t you know elegance when it’s right in front of you? huh? huhhh????

and that’s it, you’ve endured me attempting to talk about dancing for several minutes when I have no knowledge or experience on the subject! I eagerly await your input in my replies and reblogs, especially from those of you who do dance.

[whats-the-story-tc]

4th of February, 2020

"The One with Aphrodite and the Tempest"

[LONG POST WARNING]

You know it's cold outside when V wears a sweater. I swear this woman owns only 3 types of upper body clothing — flannel, striped or something with cats on it, with the occasional something grey.

First time I spotted her before Physics, she was crossing the "bridge" with the relentlessness of a warrior. Here's to another cheery day at school, I thought. I was already tired and half asleep by then and it wasn't even 10 AM yet. Pocketwatch Friend told me to hold on, as we only had 3 more classes left, "two of which you'll enjoy." I don't think I need to specify that one.

Rumours spiralled that, even though we were having double Literature today, V would have us write a previously promised Grammar test. We all started studying in a complete state of panic. What we didn't expect is that, indeed, she was going to quiz us—but in spoken word instead, by the usual rolling of her magic geek dice.

There's this competition between a girl and a boy. He jokingly claims he is better than her at everything, she challenges him. Whichever one of them has better grades at the end of the year wins. V is an absolute fan of this competition, and is pretty vocal about her support for the girl. She was V's first victim today, and when she failed to answer her questions, V, shoulder leaning against the wall, smiles and asks her "How are you gonna win this competition then, babydoll?" Haven't heard her use this pet name for any of us in a hot minute. We're usually fairies or kittens lately. (Pet naming children as a teacher is a thing here folks, don't get alarmed. Our homeroom teacher, for example, calls us her darlings all the time.) Now that I think about it, I don't think she ever called me personally any of these. The day she does is probably the day I die.

Next one up was Know-It-All, who, contrary to his pseudonym, knew fuck all about romanticism, and basically bullshitted his every answer very stupidly, having us all in a laughing fit during those ten minutes he was in the spotlight for. The faces V made were the best, I swear. She tried so hard to be polite and not to say what she thinks, and, in the process, looked at me every half a minute or so like a cry for help. Pocketwatch Friend, who also noticed it and thought it interesting, later explained it as "You're the one who's a bit higher up the intelligence scale out of all of us, of course she looks at you. And you're the one who talks to her." I don't think I was of much help, though. I was giggling the entire time. Especially when V admitted "I have no idea what's going on."

Her third and last victim was Bandana Friend's best friend, and the entire time she listened to her, V was sat in her chair, leaning back, legs crossed, absentmindedly chewing on her pen/holding it to her lips in concentration. When I tell you I could barely keep my calm, I mean it. I'm more attracted to her personality and wit than I am to her visually, but like... holy shit, you guys. The situation only worsened when she started writing on the blackboard, left hand in her back pocket... Thank God she wore a sweater. Were I exposed to that waist of hers, I don't think I'd still be alive to tell the story. "Take your hand out of your pocket," I muttered in agony, through gritted teeth as I watched her. Pocketwatch Friend had a lot of fun at my expense.

We read Edgar Allan Poe's The Masque of the Red Death today, featuring the character of Prince Prospero. V, sitting on top of her desk as she always does, asked us if that name was familiar, and left us a little time to think. Then she looks straight at me with her usual looking-at-me expression and just waits in silence. I'm panicking and probably going red in the face under that gaze that was simply too close, and, with a hand on my chest, nervously asked her "Me? Why are you looking at me?". You guys. Eyes are the first thing I usually notice in a person, the one thing I am a sucker for. And this woman has eyes to live and to die for, unparalleled by anything of this Earth and beyond. Under eyes like that, I think anyone would've struggled to form coherent thoughts. I think I know what Sappho felt when she wrote Fragment 31. As she went on to explain, she was looking at me because there is a character with the same name in Shakespeare's The Tempest. She still associates me with him, it seems. Oh, the nostalgia. Fun fact, Hamlet was the topic of our very first conversation out of class back in October 2018.

In the lunch break, I vented to my friends how I can never really impress her, no matter how hard I try. She and I both know what I know, it just frustrates me that no matter how precise and fancy I get, even then I fuck things up, or miss my chance and I can never surprise her. Turns out I was boo boo the fool. Again.

In The Masque of the Red Death, there's this ongoing motif with the clock striking, which symbolises the coming of Death. As V was talking about this, and how it frightened the guests of the masquerade, I said "I guess you could say their clock was ticking." And what do I know, she not only calls it good, but when I looked at the blackboard, she actually included it in the analysis notes! I said something useful. I was absolutely over the moon.

The Boys in the Back, in their usual mood yet again, were talking non-stop. As I looked at the annoyed V, I could read "for fuck's sake" off her lips before she told them off. Goodbye, V the professional, hello, V the civilian. I had a good laugh.

I don't know how partying came up in conversation, but Blonde Boy in the Back asked V: "Miss, do you go clubbing sometimes?", to which she answered "I'm too old for that". You are still a bloody millenial, dear, stop acting like you're sixty. But, on the topic of old ladies, when we spoke grotesque, scary and bizarre, she brought up having a room full of porcelain dolls or an old lady with a house full of cats, who looks cute on the outside but is quite creepy, I immediately went "Umbridge". At first, I didn't think she heard me, but a few seconds later, she tied what I said into what she was going to say. I feel valid.

Today, we had some rain and incredibly strong winds. "There were many individuals in the crowd who had found leisure to become aware of the presence of a masked figure which had arrested the attention of no single individual before." As a girl from my class was reading these lines, another strong gust of wind came with a whistling sound, making the windows tremble and everyone went silent. "I think it just arrived." I said immediately. Another strong blow. "[Name], I think you conjured it." I said, and looked at V, leaning over her book, trying not to react, but I think I might have seen the faintest smile run across her face.

Towards the end of the lesson, V told the gang in the back to pass notes instead of talking, to which I said "old school", and she did that thing again where she repeated what I said. Then cats came up once again, I think it was Debate Friend saying that a cat staring at a wall for an hour is creepy. "Cats will stare at a wall for an hour anyway cuz cats are crazy." V said, without missing a beat. I'll have you reminded that V owns a cat herself. And, apparently, a Netflix account, as she mentioned having seen Episode 1 of Moffat's Dracula with the boyfriend yesterday. May I just say... couple goals.

~ S ♡

[Every story I share here, no matter how specific I get with my wording, depicts actual events from my own life.]

[mfackenthal]

The MFackenthal Show and @maxattack-powell!

banner by @whenyourheartskipsabeat

Hello all!  Welcome back to the MFackenthal Show!  I am so glad that you are here today.  If you’re new to the show, I encourage you to go here to find past episodes.  There are only a few.

The MFackenthal Show has officially been green lit for more episodes!  We used to only be able to afford to run the show every once in a while, but the people have spoken - they want to see the show more often!  The funding came through and we hope to give the people what they want!  Do you want to be on the show?  Do you have someone that you want to see on the show?  If so - reblog or comment or send a message to let MFackenthal know!  We’ll see what we can do!  We have this show and two others lined up for you!

I could not be more excited to bring you this next guest.  She has been with the fandom for quite a while.  She was one of the first people I started communicating with on a regular basis.  She has talked me up, supported me from the beginning and though she hasn’t written much lately - when she does drop a chapter - it’s long and it’s worth it!  Please welcome to the stage @maxattack-powell!!!!!  (Insert Cheering here!)

(Megs greets Max with a hug - which means that Megs essentially runs and leaps into Max’s arms.  Max is fairly tall and Megs is barely 5′3″) 

Megs:  Max, I am so happy that you are here!  Can you believe that you’re here today?

Max:  Haha, yes - I can.  But I am honored to be here.

Megs:  Max, sit with me.  For those in the audience who may not know you, tell us about when and why you joined the fandom.

Max: Yanno, I always made my best guess at this before, but I knew you were going to ask me this - so I looked it up.  Did you know that now there’s this Official Tumblr blog called @memories, and it knows down to the minute when someone joined? Let me go check it… *digs through the blogs posts* Okay, it was apparently 07/31/2017 at 1:17:15 PM, which means it must have been on the weekend because of the time of day haha.

As for why ... hmm, well… I found the Choices app one day, when it only had like… three series I think! Anyone else remember that time? 

Megs:  I do!  Because I was playing Hollywood University I think I downloaded choices the day the app came out.

Max: Awh!  Well, I fell in love with The Freshman Series. Mostly because of Chris Powell and Zack Zilberg, and a long time ago I was in another fandom that had tons of fan fiction/art… so I googled “Choices Chris Powell” and any other combination I could think of looking for possible fanfiction. The fandom was almost non existent at the time. There was actually one person, who has long since left the fandom due to fandom dramas - we all know the kinds I’m talking about - but a few others had started posting their works as well… and I got hooked. Eventually I felt the bug to write how I felt TF should play out as well, and here I am *looks back at the “joined tumblr timestamp”* uhh… 20ish months ago!  Haha!!

Megs:  LOL, when you put it that way it doesn’t sound like that long ago ... lets call a spade a spade - that was almost 2 years ago!  That’s amazing!  You have to have seen so much in this fandom!  What is it that keeps you around?

Max: There are so many awesome people in this fandom, in this world we’ve all created for our pixelated loves lol. Soooo many creative minds to follow and enjoy. The content people share, original or repost… it’s great. 

... Unfortunately it is also a double edge sword ... the drama, the jealousy, the rumors, the hate, etc. I’ve sadly seen far too much and it comes in so many forms… it’s unnecessary.

Megs:  I couldn’t agree more!  If you could tell the fandom one thing - what would it be?

Max: It would be that we’re all here because we want to have a good time. No one came here to get ridiculed, to be scrutinized or chastised for their opinions, their likes or dislikes. Real life has enough of that going on. We are all individuals - if you want to be treated nicely, fairly, etc. you must also do the same to others. There is no reason someone must agree with you or anyone else. Live and let live. Embrace our differences as it makes us who we are. Most of the issues I see stem from a simple difference in opinion. That is ridiculous. Everyone’s entitled to their own thoughts. We must build each other up, not tear one another down. No one here owes anyone anything, now go have some fun.

(The room stands up in applause!)

Megs:  You should definitely stand up and take a bow, Max! 

(Max does just as Megs suggests - but she also makes Megs stand up and do the same. Laughing, they both sit back down.)

Awh, Max ... okay, let’s get back to you.  We know that you’d fight anyone for the position of The Chris Powell Appreciation/Fan Club.  And for those who don’t know, Max has been retelling the full The Freshman series, interweaving dialogue and plot from PB but also adding much of her own content.  MC and Chris get a backstory.  Chris gets best friends from back home.  What is your favorite piece that you have written?

Max: Oh geez hahaha. Um… can I just say The Freshman Chronicles as a whole? I’ve written for different fandoms, and I have original WIPs but I’ll stick to the Choices fandom for this answer. I’ve put a lot of time into TFC. Tons of additional story work, research on characters and their backgrounds, PBs and my own OCs. You should see my file folder setup haha. It’s crazy… I have so many docs, pictures and gifs. Most organized by location (Hartfeld, Boston, New Haven, Cherryfield, etc.), then by character… and on some I get more detailed and split them by emotion and situation.

Megs: By what again?

Max:  Emotion and Situation ... Yeah. I warned you it was crazy! *laughs* TFC was the reason I joined tumblr really. Instead of staying a Nonny and only reading others posted works. I wanted to comment, like and reblog what I enjoyed, while I also worked on my own contribution to the fandom. I had a vision for Chris and MC that had more than the game could give, and I wanted to see if i was still any good at writing since it had been years and years… it’s funny to see how different my current posts are from my first over a year ago. Makes me want to go update a few because they could use a little help *awkward laugh*

Megs:  I’m sure we can all relate to that!  Hmmm ... I’m starting to get a feel for this, I think, but what is your writing process?

Max:  Lots of planning, mostly in my head. When I feel like I have a decent concept I might type out some notes or work it into my outline (another crazy thing I have going for TFC because it’s so big haha). But usually, once I hatch out a basic plan on where I’m going… I just start typing. Keeping the general plot and main points I want to hit in mind, I simply start typing… keeping it as organic as possible. It usually works out well. 

Megs:  Do you have any advice for other writers?

Max: First, and most importantly… do it because you enjoy it. Don’t do it for likes, reblogs, popularity, etc. If you’re having a good time dreaming things up and typing them out, that’s what’s important. The rest is just an extra bonus. Also, don’t give up. It’s easy to become discouraged, frustrated, distracted and more… but remember - your creative cells can’t be running all the time. They need to rest just like your body. Take breaks… go read, play games, hang out with friends/family, watch a movie… whatever. Just do something to help you relax, to reset and you’ll very probably find inspiration and/or motivation to continue. Remember, this is for fun. *wink and finger guns*

Megs: So what do you do for fun?

Max: I actually have a few things I do regularly. A big one is making costumes/props for conventions, small productions, etc. I also train and show horses. I do the same with my dogs, but more for competitions and not really any shows. I’ve always drawn, sculpted, painted since I was old enough to hold things with my hands… and about a year ago I started learning how to do it digitally as well. I run (not at all for fun haha) and play hockey (totally for fun), follow comics and watch anime. I've restored houses, cars and old furniture. I like to read as much as I can - that’s an important one. I also play video games. Something I’ve done since I was young… I've even competed, and won, a few gaming tournaments.

Megs:  You don’t know how to be bored do you?

Max: LOL, Megs.  Yeah, um, so there’s a “few” *makes air quotes* of my never ending list of interests haha. Gives me a lot to talk about with people, eh?

Megs: Not that I can understand how you’d have time for this ... but what do you do to help pay for your many activities?

Max:  Oh like, my job? Well that can be a simple answer… like “I work in software” but the more interesting way to say it is I use my MBA, experience in business, the financial industry and technology to improve and stabilize my customers environment through technological solutions that fit their specific needs. *presses lips together* I solve problems by designing solutions. Bored yet? Hahaha.

Megs:  No!  That sounds wonderful!  Who doesn’t want their stuff to be designed better?  Any chance you could start working for tumblr?  Some of us have a few complaints ... tags ... mobile losing our work ...

Max:  I’m not sure they could pay me enough to help them with all of their problems!  But, tumblr, feel free to send me an offer!

Megs:  Seriously - send her a 6 figure offer!

Max:  Okay, Megs, well now I have a question for you.

Megs: Uhhhh, Max, that’s not exactly how this is supposed to go. 

Max:  Yeah, don’t care.  Your fans need to know ... Hoooow do you find the time to read and review so much?! And I know that’s just in this fandom.  I know you read books and you may read for other fandoms!?  Seriously, it’s awesome. We need to clock your page flipping speed haha.

Megs:  *blushes* Oh my gosh, you have to stop!  Here’s the key to how I do it ... I wake up at 5:30am and read for about 30 minutes.  Then I workout and start my day.  I read in line at the grocery stores.  I read on my breaks at work. 

Max:  Oh my gosh - you’re such a nerd and I love that!  Okay, nerd, what is your favorite thing to do, besides reading all the things of course?

Megs: This show, of course!  And, of course, getting people to do silly things on this show with me.  For instance - with as athletic as you are, I hear you can’t jump? 

Max:  Megs, shhhhh.  You told me you weren’t going to bring that up.

Megs:  I did no such thing! (Meg says while laughing) I said I might not bring it up.

Max:  Uh huh.

(Kris Kross’s “Jump” starts playing in the studio)

Megs:  Come on - show me what you’ve got! 

(Megs starts “singing” along and jumping along with the song. Max stays seated.  Megs finally pulls Max up into a standing position. Max plays along and “jumps” next to Megs - getting no air at all.)

Oh, come on Max - put some real strength in to it.  Jump! Jump! Jump!

(Max jumps and gets the smallest amount of air time.)

Max:  *laughing* Megs - I’m tall!  I don’t need to jump to reach things!

Megs:  *laughing* That must be nice.  I got good at this type of jumping because I had to learn to jump up and gently grab things from the grocery so I didn’t knock everything down.

*continuing to jump around the audience - getting everyone to join her* And that’s all for the show today today, folks!  Thank you for watching!!  Have a great night!

[tangent101]

Max vs. Rachel: worst friend ever

I recently came across an article where someone defended Rachel by bashing on Max and they actually brought up some valid points. But rather than stir up a hornet’s nest by trying to repost their argument, I figure I’d keep things over here instead and examine both girls.

One of the arguments about why Rachel is better than Max is that Max not only vanished from Chloe’s life soon after William’s funeral but didn’t get back in touch with Chloe until after Chloe nearly ran her over with her truck. Rachel was “with Chloe” at a point in Chloe’s life where Chloe was at her lowest and let’s be honest: Max wasn’t there. And we never truly know what happened to Max in those five years. We have hints but nothing concrete. Thus it’s up to the player to decide on Max’s motivations or reasons.

If we go for a fact-based game, here is what we know:

Max left Arcadia Bay five years ago with her parents, after William’s death.

Max has an unidentified disorder that has resulted in her having an Individualized Education Plan (IEP) and notes in her student file. (Do note, girls don’t usually get IEPs, so for Max to have one says this was something significant in her past.)

Max is not scientifically-minded or interested in medicine. She’s more into the arts and her grades are adequate... but her photography skills are why she is at Blackwell Academy.

Max actually knows what the medication in Joyce’s bathroom drawer is for and hopes Chloe doesn’t have to take this. Do note, Max doesn’t express an interest in science or medicine thus her knowing what a medication is says she has been exposed to it in some way in the past. 

Max considers herself to be inadequate and doesn’t take the initiative unless other people push her. That said, when it comes to protecting and helping Chloe she actually starts taking the initiative for herself and growing as a woman.

This is what we know about Rachel:

Rachel was an important part of Chloe’s life to the point Chloe calls Rachel “her angel” and states outright that Rachel saved her life. It is implied this is an actual event that is not spoken of but could very well have been more psychological.

Rachel and Chloe were close, to the point that Chloe felt it was a betrayal of trust (to the level of being cheated upon) when she found hardcore evidence that Rachel had been sleeping with Frank Bowers.

Rachel was hiding an “intense” relationship (that was not with Frank) from Chloe and wrote Chloe a letter and left it in their hangout. The letter was crumpled up and thrown in a waste bin (that was otherwise not used) and it was strongly implied that Rachel wanted Chloe to find the letter. In the letter, Rachel outright stated that Chloe was jealous of Rachel flirting with other people (the whole “stink eye” comment in the letter).

Rachel very likely was in a relationship with her teacher, Mark Jefferson, to the point that a number of students believed it was sexual. This includes Victoria Chase who was trying for something similar, so it seems unlikely to just be sour grapes or trying to smear Rachel’s name.

Rachel still cared very much for Chloe, but Rachel had moved on. At the very least Rachel cheated on Chloe while concealing her infidelity with more than one partner. Rachel didn’t want to lose Chloe’s friendship but was not interested in anything more than friendship at this point.

This is just from the core Life is Strange itself. With Before the Storm the waters become muddier. You have Max and Chloe having texted and emailed initially and then Max, for some reason, stopped talking to Chloe. This honestly was handled poorly by Deck Nine, almost as if the writers wanted to deliberately break the relationship between Max and Chloe so that fans would be more invested in Deck Nine’s interpretation of Rachel. This behavior becomes even worse after you see the ending of Farewell with a tape to Chloe that I have to suspect Chloe listened to until it finally broke. 

Similarly, Rachel herself started out as a manipulative ambiguous character who did some unethical things. One thing that she does in-game if you chose to have Chloe offer Victoria well-wishes for the play is drug Victoria’s tea which, given we see Victoria taking a couple relaxants due to being anxious before the play’s start, means Victoria suffered a drug overdose and then was ignored while Rachel steps in and “saves the day” while at the same time refusing to listen to Chloe insisting she didn’t want to be in the play and giving her no choice at all.

In fact, Before the Storm frequently robs Chloe of her agency. She cannot refuse Rachel in every major decision. She can’t say “no” to the two-truths-and-a-lie game. She can’t refuse to jump off the train (and is pushed off the train - not a safe thing to do to her!) and has to help Rachel rob the couple of their wine. She has to do the play, she has to get money for Rachel to run away, she has to basically do event after event. Now, there were a couple instances of this in the first Life is Strange (like having to search for beer bottles) but after that Chloe gives agency to Max (telling Chloe where to shoot). Even when Max is taped up by Mark Jefferson, she still has agency and her own actions to free her leg is the only reason that David Madsen is able to stop Mark Jefferson. 

Unfortunately, Before the Storm falls off the rails the moment Damon Merrick shows up in the junkyard to stab Rachel. Rachel vanishes from the game as an active part, Chloe is forced to become a potential felon to find information Rachel wanted despite the fact Rachel could have used this same combination to have broken into her father’s office herself once she was out of the hospital, and the ending is a twisted mess of stupidity, white knighting from NPCs, and a “twist end” that pissed off the entire fandom.

The irony is that Chloe in Life is Strange keeps comparing Max to Rachel. But when you talk to Joyce, Joyce suggests the opposite was true: Chloe was constantly talking about Max to Rachel. Now, Joyce may have been lying through her teeth. This is a woman who allowed her daughter to be abused for years so she’d not be alone... and who within two months of William’s death was flirting with some strange guy at the diner she works at and left a very flirtatious note (to the point that Max, dear wallflower “I don’t want to make waves” Max, said “she might as well proposed to him.” Max knew when William died. She saw the date of the receipt so... yeah). It is entirely possible that Joyce said “Chloe was talking about you always” to try and convince Max to stay and help “calm Chloe down” (while knowing she could easily shut Max up if Max got uppity about the abuse because Max doesn’t like to make waves).

One other thing to realize about Max is this: Max is only as manipulative as you, the player, make her out to be. (Similarly, Chloe can be a nice, snarky but otherwise polite girl to nearly everyone in BtS... or be quite unpleasant to folk.) But even at her most manipulative, she only Rewinds a conversation with Chloe a couple of times - one to make Chloe feel better about Max’s life in Seattle, and those times she is trying to save Chloe’s life and needs to choose a specific option (or even to keep her from killing Frank). In short, Max doesn’t lie to Chloe or manipulate her to fall in love with her, she treats Chloe with respect and as an intelligent young woman. 

With Rachel? In BtS she is manipulative and refuses to take “no” for an answer while keeping her own cards close to her vest. I actually like Rachel in the original LiS better, seeing that we had a young woman depicted who obviously cared for Chloe and was trying to avoid hurting Chloe even as she was having relationships with other people. 

Personally, I don’t find either to be a “worst friend ever.” Max wasn’t there for Chloe when Chloe really needed someone... but Rachel was. Rachel helped Chloe in a number of ways even as she apparently also enabled some of Chloe’s more antisocial tendencies. And while Max dragged her heels on getting back in touch with Chloe when she returned to Blackwell, when push came to shove she moved Heaven and Earth to try and protect Chloe and help Chloe find the truth about Rachel. 

Nor did Rachel “deserve” to die, and anyone who suggests that should step back and take a long look at why they think that way. 

But if Rachel had lived? Then I honestly think Chloe and her would have broken up. Rachel had moved on. She had things she wanted to do, places she wanted to be, and Chloe was too scared to leave Arcadia Bay (and leave her mother alone with Chloe’s abuser). I have to think Rachel would have done her best to stay as friends with Chloe... and who knows? Maybe she would have been good friends with Max. And when Max returned, it may very well be Max who fixed the rift that might have grown between the two so they could be friends again at the very least. Because that’s a very Max sort of thing to do.

[mysterylover123]

Maiko + Tropes

Back to Avatar the Last Airbender, where it all started. It’s time to do tropes for my ATLA OTP: Zuko/Mai. Prepare for some teenage grouchiness. (Sourced from TVTropes.) Also, Spoilers

1. ADORKABLE

Mai:  Mai is not normally very adorkable, but around Zuko she gets all giggly and blushy. They express their love in very awkward and adorable ways. The B-story in "Nightmares and Daydreams" is a good example.

Zuko: All of his attempts to be a normal and friendly guy end up charming failures. Notably, he practices an apology to a frog, then proceeds to demand an answer.

2. ANTI-VILLAIN

Mai: Though not to the extent of Ty Lee (what with being a Jerk with a Heart of Gold instead of a straight-on Nice Girl), she is still only going up against the good guys because she works under someone who is evil.

Zuko:  An early episode contrasts him with Zhao, who only wants to find the Avatar to bring himself glory while Zuko was only even there is to complete a mission so his father will love him.

3. BETA COUPLE

Mai:  With Zuko. 

Zuko: With Mai. While Aang and Katara dance around the issue, they're snuggling and watching sunsets. Flipped on its head in the comics, where Zuko and Mai go through a bad breakup while Aang and Katara are relatively stable Sickeningly Sweethearts.

4. BIRDS OF A FEATHER

Mai: With Zuko. They're both perpetually frowning Emo Teens with some kind of family issuewho are from the Fire Nation and use bladed weapons.

Zuko: With Mai. They're both perpetually frowning Emo Teens with some kind of family issue who are from the Fire Nation and use bladed weaponsWith Katara. They're both willful, compassionate, and emotional individuals who lost their respective mothers at a young age and are about equal in terms of bending abilities.

5. BROKEN BIRD

Mai: Her mother treated her like a liability instead of a daughter, was not allowed hobbies or even to speak unless spoken to, and her only friends were Ty Lee and Azula. No wonder Mai is so cynical and bitter.

Zuko: A rare male example; any innocence he had was lost between his father's and sister's abuse.

6. BROODING BOY, GENTLE GIRL

Mai: Zig zagged with Zuko — Both manage to be both with each other. For the brooding part, they both come from a dysfunctional family which led to them becoming Broken Birds but in different ways (Zuko having anger issues and Mai suppressing her emotions). As for the gentle part, both encourage one another to express themselves in healthier, non-problematic ways.

Zuko: Zig zagged with Mai — Both manage to be both with each other. For the brooding part, they both come from a dysfunctional family which led to them becoming Broken Birds but in different ways (Zuko having anger issues and Mai suppressing her emotions). As for the gentle part, both encourage one another to express themselves in healthier, non-problematic ways.Katara is the gentle girl to Zuko's brooding boy - they are a platonic variation of this trope, despite the Ship Tease.There's a very brief moment of this with Toph and Zuko - in "The Ember Island Players", Toph comforts Zuko while he's angsting over his Uncle. They go back to being Like Brother and Sister, though, when she punches him and informs him that "That's how I show affection."

7. CHARLES ATLAS SUPERPOWER

Mai: While turning her back on Azula at the Boiling Rock, she managed to consistently pin several guards onto solid metal architecture, using the same knives with which she attacks everything and everyone else. More passively, she's on even footing with the average elite bender, such as Early-Season-2 Katara and half the Terra Team sent to attack The Drill.

Zuko: While one of the most visibly muscular characters, he once punches a person across a room, and is seen shattering iron, steel, and wood with his kicks. All that training has served him well. Might be a result of Iroh's training: even among the Fire Nation, Iroh and Zuko are the only ones to display superhuman strength unrelated to bending.

8. CHILDHOOD FRIEND  ROMANCE

Mai: In a flashback, we see her admiring Zuko from afar as kids.

Zuko: With Mai. There's a flashback to Puppy Love.

9. DEADPAN SNARKER

Mai: Has a very dry sense of humor.

Zuko: Since Zuko's the most ill-tempered character in the show, this is a given. He's actually a lot like Katara in that respect: particularly sarcastic in books one and two, less so for a part of book three, and then more so for the other half.For instance, after some random kids threw an egg at Earth Kingdom soldiers, they blame Zuko, who continually denies it. It eventually leads to this exchange:Gow: The egg had to come from somewhere! Zuko: Maybe a chicken flew over.He also manages to get in a few good ones at Sokka, of all people:Zuko: I think I'm a little past your level, Sokka. Why don't you practice with the Duke or something. Sokka: The Duke? But he's, like, eight years old! Zuko: He should be a good match for you, then.Even eight-year-old Zuko gets in on the action.Azula : You waste all your time playing with knives. You're not even good! Zuko : Put an apple on your head and we'll find out how good I am!

10. DEFROSTING ICE KING/QUEEN

Mai: Much like her boyfriend, except it takes her longer to thaw.

Zuko:  It takes two and a half seasons, but he thaws with The Power of Friendship.

11. DUDE/CHICK MAGNET

Mai: Besides Zuko, another teen flirted with her in "The Beach", and Kei Lo admits to genuinely liking her.

Zuko: Sometimes in a relationship with Mai. He has loads of Ship Tease with Katara and a temporary love interest in the one-off character of Jin. The comics also have him being ship teased with Suki. Has almost as much onscreen romance as Sokka, plus a fan club and a bunch of random girls that swoon over him at the beach.

12. EERIE PALE SKINNED BRUNETTE

Mai: Emphasizing her emo personality.

Zuko: During the first season, where he has chalk-white skin coupled with a black ponytail. It later evens out slightly; sometimes his hair is dark brown instead of straight black, and he adopts a very slight tan that takes the edge off the eerie. That said, cutting off the ponytail and growing his hair out properly probably also helped.

13. HIDDEN DEPTHS

Mai: The gloomy knife thrower is a Cool Big Sis after off-screen Character Development.

Zuko: Badass, Determinator, Evil Prince -turned- The Atoner, is also a Momma's Boy and a lover of Turtleducks. In the "Ember Island Players", he gives hints that he likes theater, but just dislikes that specific group because while they have great special effects, they tend to butcher their stories. He admits to Toph that he's been doing Angst? What Angst? for some time, but the play is opening some hidden wounds.Toph: "Oh come on. Lighten up. They're just having fun." Zuko: "Fun? Of course you (Toph) like it. They made you a big buff guy! But to me... they're taking all the mistakes I made and throwing them right back in my face."His Uncle has indicated numerous times Zuko is also skilled with the fictional Tsungi horn.

14. JERK WITH A HEART OF GOLD

Mai: Generally quite a jerk but she has a soft spot for Zuko.

Zuko: He's Hot-Blooded and can still be quite rude, but Zuko is a good hearted person.

15. KICK THE DOG

Mai: In her first appearance, she turns down a hostage deal for her own infant brother.In the comics she dishes out a lot of emotional abuse against Zuko, although she still claims to care for him. She jokes about his death, his choice of friends after meeting Aang, and talks about how awful he is in general to Kei Lo.

Zuko: Often when he was in danger of becoming too nice, at least until his formal Heel–Face Turn in Book 3.

16. LONELY RICH KID

Mai: She has no friends other Ty-Lee and Azula, and they were off at the circus or war.

Zuko: He is the banished prince of the Fire Nation, but you can literally count the people who genuinely care for him on one hand (Iroh, Mai and Ursa). Eventually subverted when he makes his Heel–Face Turn, after which he becomes part of Aang's True Companions.

17. LOVE REDEEMS

Mai:  She follows Zuko in Heel–Face Turn because of his turn and her love for him.

Zuko: Averted with Mai. He leaves her before switching to the good side and the two don't reconcile their relationship until after the final battle. Instead it was familial love for Iroh, whom he acknowledges as his true father figure and role model, that redeems him. The shame he feels for betraying his uncle's trust is part of what compels him to make his Heel–Face Turn. He also influenced Mai to follow suit and betray Azula.

18. THE MASOCHISM TANGO

Mai: Her relationship with Zuko is not healthy. The two love each other but their conflicting morals and lack of communication leads to countless fights and their constant break-ups. She spends pages in Avatar: The Last Airbender – Smoke and Shadow describing what a horrible boyfriend Zuko is and how badly a relationship with him had hurt her. This leads to her making harsh jokes at his expense and she expresses the need for her to "move on" by dating Kei Lo.

Zuko: Has this type of relationship with Mai. They love each other but constantly fight, do not understand each other, have different morals and are always breaking up only to get back together again. Mai tells Kei Lo about how miserable Zuko makes her feel and she later says it to Zuko's face about how much of an idiot she was to date him.

19. MEANINGFUL NAME

Mai: Mai is the Cantonese pronunciation of 袂 meaning "sleeve of a robe", which is where Mai conceals her weapons.Her name is phonetically similar to the Japanese mei (冥, めい), meaning "dark", which is relatable to her gloomy personality.

Zuko: Zuko's name is written in Chinese characters which read as "ancestor's robber". It may or may not be intentional, but Zuko is an actual name in a Filipino dialect. Its meaning? "Madness" or "Angry." And he spends a lot of time angry in the show...

20. MUGGLE-MAGE ROMANCE

Mai:  In a relationship with Zuko.

Zuko: In a relationship with non-bender Mai.

21. NEW OLD FLAME

Mai: She and Zuko are a textbook "skip all the boring foreplay and get right to the intensity." Contrast with the heroic Official Couple, who were in the foreplay stage for fifty episodes. In this case we see a flashback of them as Childhood Friends before the reunion.

Zuko: Zuko and Mai are a textbook "skip all the boring foreplay and get right to the intensity." Contrast with the heroic Official Couple, who were in the foreplay stage for fifty episodes. In this case, we see a flashback of them as Childhood Friends before the reunion.

22. NOBLE DEMON

Mai: She may be on Azula's side, but she's not evil.

Zuko: Character Development for him in Season 1. He goes from burning down the Kyoshi Warriors' village in his pursuit of Aang to abandoning a later pursuit to keep his soldiers safe. Even right from the start, he threatens the South Pole villagers to get information on the Avatar but when Aang promises to come quietly if he leaves the Water tribe alone, Zuko agrees (and keeps his word).

23. OPPOSITES ATTRACT

Mai: She and Zuko somehow manage to be this and Birds of a Feather. Despite their apparent similarities, their temperaments are completely opposite: Zuko is a Hot-Blooded Determinator, whereas Mai is an emotionless Defrosting Ice Queen.

Zuko:  He and Mai somehow manage to be this and Birds of a Feather. Despite their apparent similarities, their temperaments are completely opposite: Zuko is a Hot-Blooded Determinator, whereas Mai is an emotionless Defrosting Ice Queen.

24. PERPETUAL FROWNER

Mai: Even when she's cuddling with her boyfriend she's frowning.

Zuko: "I'm never happy." Though it is averted around Mai, and after he joins Team Avatar.

25. RED ONI, BLUE ONI

Mai: The blue to Ty Lee's red. Or, since Ty Lee describes Mai's aura as grey, and hers as pink, Mai's the Grey Oni to Ty Lee's Pink Oni.

Zuko: The emotional, easily angered Red Oni to his sister's calculating, eerily calm Blue Oni, though it's reversed after her Villainous Breakdown. This is enforced by the colors of the Flames they produce; Zuko's flames are red/orange, while Azula's are blue.The hot-tempered, loud Red Oni to Aang's positive, peace-loving Blue Oni, which is visualized through their facial markings (red scar vs. blue tattoos)

26. RELATIONSHIP REVOLVING DOOR

Mai: She is in a constant on-off relationship with Zuko. It's unstable to say the least. They get together only to break things off a few months later. They make up but then decide to call it quits again. It is supposed to be a contrast to Aang and Katara's solid relationship.

Zuko:  His relationship with Mai is complicated and...unstable to say the least. They break up at least twice in the series and once again in the comics.

27. SOUR OUTSIDE SAD INSIDE

Mai: Like Zuko, she acts cold as a result of her past.

Zuko: He may act abrasive, but knowing his past, it's not hard to see why.

28. TALL DARK AND SNARKY

Mai: A raven-haired Snark Knight. It's a trait she shares with Zuko.

Zuko: Tallest teenager in the series with raven hair and a cynical attitude.

29. TOOK A LEVEL IN BADASS

Mai: Mai already established herself as a badass (but quiet and knife obsessed) Lady of War took a level in badass in the episode "The Boiling Rock, Part 2". Mai took out 13 prison guards and freed the gondola line to help Zuko and company escape the boiling rock prison...and Princess Azula. Although this could just be a case of Mai being Not So Stoic.

Zuko: He gradually improves throughout the series, but he makes dramatic improvements in season 3. It's then he learns to redirect the most powerful of lightning, holds his own against his sister, casually raise a huge fire tunnel that engulfs an entire hallway, and most importantly, firebends without relying on rage.

30. UNDYING LOYALTY

Mai: To Zuko. Even when their relationship is on the rocks, she remains loyal. Two instances: the Boiling Rock encounter where Zuko explains his treason and desertion and inspires her to defy Azula herself, and again in the "Rebound" free comic day issue where she discovers her father wants to use her as an insider against Zuko in a bid to put Ozai back on the throne.

Zuko: This is Zuko's greatest weakness and greatest strength. Loyalty kept Zuko on the side of his father and sister long after he stopped seeing things their way, but when he finally made up his mind to join Aang, he took a lot of punishment from them without complaint to win their trust, and he protected them over and over. In the sequel, Zuko abdicated the throne, naming his daughter Fire Lord, so that he could travel the world after Aang's death, to keep their dream alive while the Avatar could not.

31. WHEN HE/SHE SMILES

Mai: Just like her boyfriend, she frowns so often that she looks really cute when she smiles genuinely.

Zuko:  The poor guy is frowning so often (and for good reason), the few times he gives a genuine smile are really heartwarming.

32. WELL, EXCUSE ME PRINCESS

Mai: To Zuko. She doesn't put up with his angsting.

Zuko: Something of a male version of this trope in regards to Mai. She doesn't put up with his brooding and temperamental nature, instead encouraging him to lighten up.

[sexydeathparty]

How To Start An Anti-Ageing Regime With Products That Actually Work

We hope you love the products we recommend! All of them were independently selected by our editors. Just so you know, HuffPost UK may collect a share of sales or other compensation from the links on this page if you decide to shop from them. Oh, and FYI — prices are accurate and items in stock as of time of publication.

We have a complicated relationship with anti-ageing skincare.

Yes, in principle we fully agree that there’s no shame in getting older. But how many of us can honestly say we’ve never been tempted by a cream that claims to zap wrinkles, or a serum swearing to reduce our eye bags? 

The global anti-ageing market is predicted to be worth a whopping £306 billion by 2030 – so there’s no denying that a lot of us are spending money on these products. 

If you’re going to buy these items, it’s helpful to know what works, and what’s just cleaver marketing. 

How can we add anti-ageing products into our daily skincare regimes that actually make a difference? What should we look for if we want to start targeting fine lines, wrinkles and hyperpigmentation? And when should we start doing it? 

To answer all these important questions (and many more) we’ve spoken to a number of skincare specialists and got the ‘411’ on the truth about anti-ageing skincare – and busted all the myths too! 

There’s no set age you should start using anti-ageing skincare products

Believe it or not, there’s no set age when you should start using anti-ageing products to prevent the signs of ageing occurring. Ultimately, it’s your choice when (or if) you choose to implement anti-ageing products into your skincare routine. 

However, it’s important to note that the ageing process may start a little earlier than you would think. 

Mehmet Göker, dermatology specialist atVera Clinic, explains: “Although there is not a set age recommended to begin an anti-ageing skincare routine the ageing process can start as early as your twenties and visible signs may start appearing post 30.

“I recommend starting to use anti-ageing products during your mid-twenties, however the choice is ultimately down to each individual putting their skin type into high consideration.”

Helen Green, skincare expert at Transform Hospital Group, agrees, saying “everyone’s skin is different”.

“It ages at different rates and because of that, we all need to have tailored skincare regimes,” she adds. “The process of ageing starts when skin starts to thin, when cell turnover slows and hydration is lost. This is when fine lines and wrinkles start to appear.”

Prevention is key to healthy, youthful-looking skin

If your skin isn’t showing signs of ageing, Green recommends taking preventative steps to keep skin healthy, such as keeping it protected from UVA and UVB rays and keeping it hydrated.

 “Many people don’t believe that there is a difference between UVA and UVB rays and therefore don’t get adequate protection against both,” she says. “In actual fact, UVA rays have a longer wavelength and are associated with skin ageing, whereas UVB have a shorter wavelength and are associated with skin burning.

“Both are invisible and dangerous and require protection on every day of the year, even if it’s cloudy outside.”

Lots of people think that if their make-up or skincare already has SPF in it, they’re protected, but this isn’t always the case. 

“In order to get the required level of protection, you would need a huge amount of make-up or skincare on your face – far more than even the biggest make-up or skincare fans could apply,” Green adds.

Because of this, you’ll want to use suncream as well as your SPF moisturiser. 

It pays to establish your skin type 

According to Göker, it’s important to create a skincare routine that targets your specific skin type. This may also change as you age. 

“Firstly find a cleanser that suits your skin type. Facial cleansing should be the first step in any skincare routine as it is vital for removing any skincare product or makeup that you’ve applied during the day, as well as natural skin oils, pollutants, and bacteria that are accumulated,” he says. 

“Finding a good toner would be the next step to benefitting your skin by balancing the skin. Finally, you should regularly moisturise the skin to hydrate and soften.”

As an extra step, Göker recommends applying an overnight facial serum and exfoliating weekly. 

Green agrees, explaining that: “Exfoliation is a very important skincare step as it removes surface grime, impurities, makeup and dead cells. This allows greater penetration of active ingredients when they are then applied to the freshly cleansed skin. 

“It is important however to avoid an overly aggressive exfoliant as this can have the negative effect of triggering oil production, dehydration and effect the barrier function of the skin.”

For a gentler exfoliant, Green suggests using a glycolic acid as a chemical exfoliant to give skin a brighter, fresher look. 

For those worried about under-eye bags, Göker recommends adding a targeted eye cream to your makeup bag. 

Are retinoids important? 

If there’s one ingredient group we hear about time and again in anti-ageing ads, it’s retinoids. But what does this even mean? And do they work? 

Göker says the ”products to look out for that will benefit your skin include retinoids”. 

“This term is used for vitamin A compounds, such as retinol and retinoic acid. These ingredients have long been used topically to help repair sun-damaged skin and reduce fine lines and wrinkles,” he explains. 

“Retinol exfoliates the skin, increases skin cell turnover, and stimulates collagen synthesis beneficial for anti-ageing and skin-clearing benefits.”

While there is no set time to start using retinoids (and you may not want to at all), Göker advises that you might want to consider them from your mid to late twenties and early thirties. 

Green agrees, explaining: “Everyone’s skin is different but as we start to age, our skin becomes thinner, cell turnover slows, you lose hydration and as a result, lines and wrinkles start to develop. 

“A topical retinoid (which contains Vitamin A) possesses anti-inflammatory properties and works by normalising the cell life cycle. It clears pores, smooths skin and gives a radiant appearance.”

Do you need to buy the most expensive products?

There’s a common misconception that more expensive skincare products produce better results, when this isn’t necessarily the case. 

“Many people get caught up in how much skincare costs, thinking that the most expensive products will be best for their skin,” Green says. “However, it’s less about the price and more about choosing the right product for your individual needs.′

A good anti-ageing skincare regime is all about maintaining the health of your skin, she adds, through the use of antioxidants (such as Vitamin C and Vitamin E).

“Most skin ageing is caused by external factors such as smoking, UV rays, stress and the consumption of alcohol,” says Green. “All these elements produce free radicals which attack and destroy healthy skin calls, causing premature ageing.”

Taking note of the advice above, to help you kickstart your anti-ageing skincare regime (or improve it), we’ve put together a guide to some of the best buys for starter anti-ageing skincare. 

Related...

17 Gentle But Mighty Beauty Buys For Sensitive Skin That Experts Love

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15 Multipurpose Beauty Products You Need In Your Life (And Makeup Bag)

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[whitewolfofwinterfell]

Please spill tea on Rachel/Joey as a romantic ship since I know you're with me on being one of the few who still ships Ross/Rachel!

This is a very strange ask for me to receive, since I’ve spoken about my like for Joey and Rachel as a romantic pairing in the past, even above Ross and Rachel (you may not have seen it because I tend to just rant in the tags of my posts haha, but you can see some of the things I’ve said in my Rachel/Joey tag here). Having said that, it is a topic that I go back and forth with because I see the positives of both ships and I like both for different reasons. However, this may go in a different direction than you expected since I do really like Joey and Rachel, so beware that this does contain some anti-Rosschel content, and it’s pretty long (sorry, I have a lot of thoughts on this).

On paper, Rachel and Joey are the perfect couple and I love their relationship on the show so much. They had such a respectful, loving and endearing friendship that was so beautiful. Even as I’m trying to sit here and think of the negative side to Rachel and Joey’s relationship, I can’t. It was so open, warm, trusting and sweet. Joey falling in love with Rachel is one of my favourite arcs on the entire show, because it’s so realistic and emotional. We’ve all had that moment at some point in our lives where we have a close friend who we’ve only ever thought of platonically but then something happens and we see them differently, whether it’s just for that one moment or whether it develops into something more like it did for Joey. I’ve never really seen it discussed before, but all of the characters on Friends developed over the seasons, except Joey. Who Joey is in season 1 is practically exactly who he is in season 10. Falling in love with Rachel is the only time we actually got to see a change in Joey. It was the first time he’d ever been in love so it was incredibly difficult for him to navigate those intense feelings anyway, but it was a million times harder because he was also dealing with the confusion and guilt of that person being Rachel who was pregnant with Ross’ child. How Joey handled himself throughout the situation was so beautiful to watch and made me fall in love with his character in an entirely new way. Here’s this guy who’s specifically known for being a womaniser and an immature bachelor, but he was mature, selfless and fair throughout the entire thing.

Joey falling in love with Rachel made perfect sense. He lived with her and was incredibly close to her, they got each other and had fun, and you could just perfectly see and understand why he would love her. In comparison to Ross, whose love for Rachel was just there from the beginning and mainly based on an infatuation he’d had since he was a child, Joey’s feelings for Rachel were incredibly complex. When Joey’s feelings for Rachel seemed to pass, I thought that was the end of it and then BAM, Rachel had her dream and suddenly she had feelings for Joey. This was the point at which I knew something had to happen, because two friends don’t both just develop feelings for each other out of nowhere, that has to mean something. Watching Rachel’s feelings for Joey develop wasn’t nearly as enjoyable as watching Joey’s (but that’s mainly because whenever Rachel has the slightest interest in someone she immediately becomes annoying to me), but again, it made sense to me. She was close to Joey, he was always there for her, she knew he had romantic feelings for her recently and hey, he’s an attractive dude!

The perfect basis was already in place for an amazing romance to develop between the two – they’d been best friends for 8 years, lived together for two(?) years, they had an attraction and a special bond - yet when it finally happened it just didn’t work. Every time I rewatch the show (and that’s a lot) I ask myself the same question about Joey and Rachel and that’s – why!? Why didn’t it work? Because it doesn’t make sense to me, but of course, that can be summed up in one word: Ross.

Ross and Rachel are that couple, aren’t they? They’re so iconic, everyone worldwide knows them and from the very beginning they just sucked everyone in. Nowadays I see people growing tired of the will-they-won’t-they trope because it’s so overdone, but when Friends was first airing, it reeled people in hook line and sinker. What really sells Ross and Rachel as a couple is Jennifer and David’s chemistry but also that intense passionate love that Ross and Rachel have. The problem is, that beyond this I do struggle to see what makes sense about Ross and Rachel. This is where you may want to stop reading if you’re a huge Ross/Rachel fan because it’s going to get a quite anti-Rosschel.

It starts off as a very one-sided relationship that is built upon Ross’ crush on Rachel that goes back to high school and by the time they do finally admit their feelings and get together, there’s just a series of endless arguments and break-ups which suggest it’s not a very healthy or happy relationship. From Ross’ perspective, in particular, I think his perception of Rachel and his relationship with her was incredibly distorted. All of their issues in season 3 are because of Ross’ insecurities, because he spent his high school years pining for a girl that was “out of his league”, once he was with her he was constantly afraid he would lose her and that led to possessive behaviour. What always sticks in my mind is the conversation they have about Rachel working too much and Ross expresses that he feels she has this entirely different life that he’s not a part of, and Rachel explains that she’s glad about that because she wants to have something in her life that is separate from him. She says that she’s scared but she’s happy because she’s out there in the world doing something for herself and she asks if he’s okay with that, which he replies yes, but then over her shoulder when they hug he says he’s not. Because Friends is a sitcom, comedy is injected into that scene, but it’s actually not very funny at all. What about what Rachel said is even slightly unreasonable? In most relationship’s an individual’s work is the only part of their life that is not intertwined with their partner and is the place where they can channel their passions and energies. Ross had his career at the museum which was clearly very important to him yet Rachel couldn’t have hers because that made him insecure. What’s even worse is when you think back to the list he made about Rachel, under the cons he listed “Just a waitress” as one of her cons, yet when she decided to break out of the coffee house and launch a career, he didn’t like it. So what did he want from her? Rachel always felt very much like an achievement to Ross rather than a person, particularly in the early seasons. I don’t necessarily want to pit the two relationships against each other but when you compare how well Joey knew Rachel and his opinion of her in comparison to Ross, there’s no comparison. Ross was in love with the idea of Rachel (I think as the seasons progressed he did fall in love with who she was more so), but it still didn’t feel like he really knew her and loved her for her. Proof of that can be seen by his negative reaction when she started to change and become her own person and establish a life for herself.

Having said that, there was an inexplicable pull between Ross and Rachel that brought them back together time and time again. They finally admitted their feelings to each other and got together in season 2, only to split up the same day because of the list Ross made, then they got back together later in the season after the prom video, then they took a break in season 3 (by this point they’d been in a relationship for total of 11 episodes), got back together in the next episode and broke up soon after when Rachel found out Ross slept with Chloe.10 episodes later, in season 4, they got back together at the beach house only to split up the next day because of the whole ‘we were on a break’ argument. Nothing much happened with them after that and they seemed to be moving on, until Ross met Emily and Rachel realised she still has feelings for him and went to England to stop the wedding but Ross said her name at the altar, so that ended in tears hah. Throughout season 5 Ross fights for his marriage and is insistent he loves Emily, whilst Rachel continues to pine for him. By the time we get to season 6, this is where they’ve both seemingly moved on from one another and then lo and behold, they get married in Vegas! After this Ross realises he has feelings for Rachel AGAIN, which seems to soon pass. In season 7, it seems like they’re moving on again until they wind up kissing after Monica and Chandler get engaged. Season 8 is of course the season where Rachel falls pregnant with Emma and from that point until the middle of season 9 when they’re living together and raising Emma, their relationship seems headed in the romantic direction once again. Then they decide their arrangement isn’t working so Rachel moves out and back in with Joey, and they go back to their own lives. That brings us to the end whereby they finally come to realise they want to be with each other in the finale. Wow, that’s one hell of a long and complicated relationship, right? But it perfectly displays the on-off nature of Rachel and Ross’ relationship and shows that even when they were supposedly over each other or moving on, they very quickly found each other again. What I never got about all of this is why it happened. I understand it up until around season 4, but past that I don’t. Why did Ross say Rachel’s name at his wedding? I don’t care what anyone says, at that time he was not in love with Rachel. He agreed to stop seeing Rachel to make his marriage with Emily work, for crying out loud. Also, why did Rachel continue to love a man that had made an immature pros and cons list about her when they first got together, was possessive and jealous when she got a job, fell into bed with the first woman he clapped eyes on when she told him they were on a break (I mean, who does that!?) and refused to accept responsibility for his actions or act with even the tiniest shred of maturity when presented with the chance of getting back together with her? What is it about this man are we supposed to believe makes him a man that Rachel is in love with? It doesn’t make sense. Neither does the fact that they randomly kiss and have sex for no reason what so ever other than the fact that they have before. When they have sex and Rachel gets pregnant with Emma, that literally happens because they’re both there and it’s easy because they’ve been together before and they know they’re in a place where emotionally they’re not attached, so they can treat it as a casual one-night stand.

But, back to Joey and Rachel, because that’s technically what this ask is supposed to be about rather than Ross and Rachel. I think in comparison to Ross and Rachel, whose relationship was incredibly rocky and problematic, Joey and Rachel had a much better build-up, a richer relationship and a more complex connection. The problem with Joey and Rachel is that the audience were already too invested in Ross and Rachel, for a Joey/Rachel romance to last long-term and the writers couldn’t fully let go of Ross and Rachel, no matter what they did. I’m not sure what the intentions with Rachel and Joey were or if the writers even intended for them to be the real deal and stay together, or if it was supposed to be brief like it was, but it certainly felt like they never fully committed to it. 

Again, what bothers me about this is that Rachel and Joey splitting up didn’t really make sense and neither did Ross’ reaction. Of course Ross was going to react strongly to finding out about them, but it really didn’t make sense to have Ross react the way he did unless he still had feelings for Rachel and/or was in love with her, which we were told he didn’t and there seemed to be no indication of anything to the contrary until that point. No matter how long your history is with someone or whether they’re the mother of your child, the fact was that Rachel was his ex, Ross had a girlfriend (Charlie) and as Ross himself pointed out, he and Rachel hadn’t been a couple in 6 years. So it didn’t really make sense for Ross to react that way. He and Rachel were exes, so what? They’d both moved on, Ross with Charlie, and Joey and Rachel deserved a shot. What also didn’t make sense is the way in which Rachel and Joey split up, since the issue they came upon again was completely fixable. A lot of people when transitioning from friends to romantic partners experience initial awkwardness. When Ross and Rachel first tried to have sex, Rachel couldn’t stop laughing, but they persevered because they knew they wanted to be together and it should’ve been the same for Joey and Rachel. They were clearly attracted to each other physically and they wanted to be together, so once they’d pushed through that barrier once, they would’ve been fine. The only reason they split up at that point is because the writers knew they couldn’t make it work after having invested so much time in Ross and Rachel. I really think if the writers and audience weren’t so fixated on Ross and Rachel, Joey and Rachel could’ve gone all the way. I also think if it had been a real life situation and not a show, Joey and Rachel would’ve lasted. There was absolutely no reason they wouldn’t last because they were incredibly compatible. Their relationship ended before it even began, I mean, they really didn’t even give it a chance at all and immediately afterwards it was completely swept under the rug as though it never happened. That’s something that will always bug me and is just proof that the writers wanted to try and erase Joey and Rachel because they wanted Ross and Rachel to be endgame. But the fact remains if they knew they wanted a Ross and Rachel endgame (which they clearly knew very early on) why did they decide to go down the Joey/Rachel route? It didn’t really make sense in that context. 

One thing I will say is that despite the seemingly anti-Rosschel sentiment of this, Ross and Rachel’s romantic chemistry always felt stronger than Joey and Rachel’s, and their relationship always felt much more natural. However, I put that down to the actors. I think because Jennifer and David were portraying a romantic relationship from rather early on, they fell into a natural rhythm but Jennifer and Matt were such good friends on and off-screen, that when they had to make that transition to a couple, it didn’t quite click. And I’m pretty sure even Matt and Jennifer themselves protested against them being a couple, claiming it was too weird because they were brother and sister, so clearly their hearts weren’t really in playing that relationship and I think that shows in their performances. So, it’s strange because in terms of writing, I’m all for Joey and Rachel, but in terms of the chemistry and the feeling of the couple, I’m all for Ross and Rachel. I also think that despite the problematic elements of Ross and Rachel’s relationship I mentioned above, they changed and developed and by the time they got back together in season 10 I think they were much more suited and ready for a proper relationship. A big part of the issue with their relationship in the early seasons is that Ross was in a completely different place to Rachel. Even in season 1 Ross is very together - he has an established career as a palaeontologist, he earns a decent wage, he has his own apartment in the city, he’s been married - but Rachel, in comparison, is just starting out in life. In season 1 she completely uproots herself and leaps into a world she’s never been part of, so by the time she and Ross get together she’s still adjusting to that huge change. She hasn’t built a life for herself yet and she hasn’t found what she enjoys or what her path is in life, but Ross is already sure in himself and that’s why Rachel freaks out when he starts talking about having kids and moving to Scarsdale. At that point, Rachel isn’t ready for any of that, she’s still trying to deal with having a part-time job at Central Perk and trying to decide where she goes from there. But by season 10 she’s established herself in an amazing career, she’s a mother and she’s grown so much and she’s finally right there with Ross and ready for all of that. As for Ross, by season 10 he’s realised that Rachel loves him and has chosen him so his insecurities shouldn’t be so much of a problem. So where Ross and Rachel start and where they end up is two vastly different places, and although I don’t like the way the journey was written, they earned that ending.

In comparison, Joey and Rachel just can’t compete with that. As sweet and well-developed as they were, they can’t compete with that magnetic pull between Rachel and Ross that continued for 10 years. Ross and Rachel had simply been built up too much for too long for Rachel and Joey to be able to swoop in at such a late point in the series and be endgame. Perhaps if certain things were different and Rachel hadn’t of had Emma, Rachel and Joey could’ve worked, but Ross and Rachel were too entwined to ever separate and I think if they’d ended up with other people and Rachel had ended up with Joey, somewhere deep down inside they would have always felt a sense of regret and “what if?” and I definitely think that would’ve cast a shadow on Rachel and Joey’s relationship if they’d stayed together.

To conclude this big muddle of a response, I really like Joey and Rachel together and see a lot of potential with them as a couple, but their romantic chemistry was lacking and dare I say it, even felt awkward at times, and they simply couldn’t get to the same place as Ross and Rachel. Ross and Rachel were written as being the love of each other’s lives and despite the messiness their relationship, I strongly believe their fate was sealed in TOW Prom Video and there was no coming back from that. 

[motorcyclegirlfriends]

Listen, I love our girls together and posts about how drastic they’re being on behalf of each other are funny, but it’s also important to remember the other important aspects of their characters and lives.

So just a reminder—

1. Lena bought Catco for more reasons than just making Kara feel better or to be with Kara. 

She’s an intelligent business woman and knows that the positive press she’s been getting is instrumental in her end game of making L-Corp a positive force, and it would actively turn to negative press with Edge at it’s helm. It’d be really really bad for her.

Lena buying Catco has been described in Supergirl press as her doing something big for Kara, but she would not have actually ended up buying Catco if there were not massive benefits for doing so. 

In fact, in an alternate universe in which she didn’t know Kara but was still getting good press from Catco and still was concerned about what Edge would do with Catco (a.k.a. the same situation but without Kara), she’d still buy it.

Others have already spoken more thoroughly about this idea but it bears repeating.

2. Kara was not singlehandedly brought out of her depression by Lena, and she wasn’t regularly lashing out at everyone except Lena. 

The only times that Kara was seen to react defensively were when she was confronted with how closed off she’s being—which is something that we’re lead to believe has only just been happening this episode since they’ve been giving her space. She hasn’t been walking around saying mean things to people out of nowhere, she’s just been keeping herself from feeling.

And Lena does not get any of that because Lena does not confront Kara. When she implies that there are other reasons that Kara is avoiding her, it’s about Lena’s role in it all rather than what it actually is for Kara—cutting herself off from everyone. So Kara just reassures her because she isn’t being prodded about what it actually is. It being Lena’s fault is nonsense, and it’s really easy to say that.

And when Kara says she quit her job, Lena doesn’t say “Um, what the hell?? Why????” she just gives her a reason to come back.

Which brings me to my next point.

Helping people is Kara’s main concern a lot of the time, and currently the only thing she is letting herself care about.

And Lena plays a big role in bringing Kara a little bit back to herself for this reason. But she’s the final push (other than Kara’s pushing of herself, which is important to remember, too) out of many little pushes that have helped Kara move forward.

James confronts her first and it forces Kara to say what she’s been thinking the whole time—Kara Danvers doesn’t help people. And he says things that she isn’t ready to accept now—that Kara Danvers does help people, as a reporter—but that will help her later when she has more reasons to believe it’s true.

Alex’s confrontation is rather messy and unsuccessful at getting through to Kara, until the end. Those final words, “Kara Danvers is my favorite person. She saved me more times than Supergirl ever could. So just think about that while you’re trying to get rid of her.” are exactly the counter argument for what Kara is thinking, and Kara is forced to sit with it.

When Kara talks to J’onn, she voices her deeper fear (as an argument for what Alex said), “I can’t help people if I’m broken.”

She thinks Kara Danvers is broken. And if she lets herself be her, she’d be failing Earth. Her mother. Her birth family. Her Earth family. Because she can’t help people that way, and that’s her purpose.

But J’onn gives Kara a specific example of how Kara Danvers has helped him. And—importantly—because of her grief. 

And when Lena asks Kara to go back to Catco, she’s proving that Kara Danvers can still help people, right now. This is a concrete thing example of something only Kara Danvers can do for someone. (Which is one example of why Kara really needs Lena to only see her as Kara Danvers, for the time being.)

It’s Kara’s entire support system that works together to help Kara.

1. James forces Kara to voice the idea Kara has—that she has to only be Supergirl because Kara Danvers can’t help people— so they can argue against it.

2. Alex gives a general counter argument that Kara has to consider, does consider—Kara Danvers helps her more than Supergirl.

3. J’onn gives a specific example for how Kara Danvers has helped him in the past—Kara Danvers’ grief helped him deal with his own.

4. Lena offers a specific example for how Kara Danvers can help her in the present—Kara Danvers is the only person who can help Lena learn to run Catco.

All of these are vital to Kara’s progression, vital to getting her to want to “wake up.” There is no one person who gets through to her. 

It’s everyone who cares about her helping her to move forward, together, and that’s kind of why it’s great.

So forgetting that would be a massive pity.

Posts prioritizing supercorp stuff over their other character content may make us laugh or feel good about their connection, but they are also often inaccurate to the full picture, and we should remember that.

It’s just as important for us, the fans, not to lose the individual within the romantic relationship as it is for the writers.

[douchebagbrainwaves]

INCLUDING, I HOPE, THE PROBLEM THAT HAS AFFLICTED SO MANY PREVIOUS COMMUNITIES: BEING RUINED BY GROWTH

But though I can't predict specific winners, I can offer a recipe for recognizing them. If you try too hard to conceal your rawness—by trying to reverse-engineer Winograd's SHRDLU.1 Grad school is the other end of a trade loses a dollar. After a while this filter will start to operate as you write. I know are professors, but it is the irreducible core of it, but thoughtful people aren't willing to use a forum with a lot of thoughtful people in it, and focus our efforts where they'll do the most good. I was writing this, my mind wandered: would it be useful to have an automatic book?2 Number one will be your own confidence in it. I told you so. Or perhaps the frontpage protects itself, by advertising what type of submission is expected. But only some of them will be a minority squared. An individual mine or factory owner could decide to install a steam engine, and within a few years he could probably find someone local to make him one.3

The Model T didn't have all the features previous cars did.4 I'm not saying spoken language always works best. And when my friend Trevor showed up at my house recently, he was carrying a Powerbook identical to mine.5 Apparently only recommendations really matter at the best schools. Never say we're passionate or our product is great.6 You meet a lot of trolls in it.7 On Demo Day each startup will only get ten minutes, so we were pretty excited when we figured out what seemed to us the optimal way of doing shopping searches. If you disagree, try living for a year using only the resources available to the average Frankish nobleman in 800, and report back to us. All previous revolutions have spread.

But will people pay for information otherwise? People who think the labor movement was the creation of wealth seems to appear and disappear like the noise of a fan as you switch on and off.8 At Rehearsal Day, we have a dress rehearsal called Rehearsal Day. Off, quiet. Wealth is defined democratically. The evolution of technology is captured by a monopoly, it will go to work for you without giving them options likely to be worth something. And if there are people getting rich by creating wealth. A free market interprets monopoly as damage and routes around it.9 It takes a conscious effort to remind oneself that the real world: they're small; you get to start from scratch; and the problem is usually artificial and predetermined.

Not because it's causing economic inequality, the former because founders own more stock, and the granary the wealth that each family created. But that isn't true.10 You can demonstrate your respect for one another in some way. And because startup founders work under great pressure, it's critical they be friends. But there will be more room for spikes. When we describe one as smart, it's shorthand for smarter than other three year olds.11 And yet half the people around you are out of their heads. Will people create wealth if they can't get paid for it. The most dangerous thing for the frontpage is stuff that's too easy to upvote.

Bad comments are like kudzu: they take over rapidly.12 People reply to dumb jokes with dumb jokes. Intelligence and wisdom are obviously not mutually exclusive. But the really striking change, as intelligence and wisdom too, but this predisposition is not itself intelligence. The information needed to conduct such studies is increasingly available. When people say something substantial that gets modded down, they stubbornly leave it up. You have to know what an n 2 algorithm is if you want to attract hackers to write software that will sell your hardware, you have to choose between several alternatives, there's an upper bound on your performance: choosing the best every time. I suppose that's worth something. I expect them to be written as thin enough skins that users can see the evolution of species because branches can converge.13 If you buy a custom-made car, something will always be breaking.14 It's pretty clear now that the things we build are so complicated, there's another rapidly growing subset: making things easier.

What a disaster that would be of the same curve. For most of us, it's not made equally. But that's like using a screwdriver to open bottles; what one really wants is a bottle opener. But it would be some kind of fundamental limit eventually. But the really striking change, as intelligence and wisdom too, but this predisposition is not itself intelligence.15 And from my friends who are professors I know what branch of the tree to bet on now.16 Do you, er, want a printout of yesterday's news? YC founders presenting at Demo Day, because Demo Day presentations are now so short that they rarely include much if any demo. Wise means something—that one is on average good at making the right decisions about language design. So it's kind of misleading to ask whether you'll be at home in computer science. But now that I've realized what's going on, perhaps there's a third option: to write something that sounds like spontaneous, informal speech, and deliver it that way too. And the way to ensure that is to ask what you need as a user.17

I'm sure most of those who want to decrease economic inequality. I say let's aim at the problems. They use different words, certainly. But only graduation rates, then you'll improve graduation rates.18 It's more important to grow fast or die. This was an era when small firms making everything from cars to candy were getting consolidated into a new kind of farming. Much of what's in the sage's head is also in the head of a 1950s auto executive, the attitude must have been dismayed when I jumped up to the whiteboard and launched into a presentation of our exciting new technology.

Notes

But if you do. The Roman commander specifically ordered that he had to for some reason insists that you should at least some of those you can send your business plan to make a fortune in the sort of pious crap you were doing more than the 50 minutes they may introduce startups they like to cluster together as much income. You could also degenerate from 129. This technique wouldn't work if the statistics they use; if there is one of them is that you'll expend a lot of face to face with the earlier stage startups, you may as well, partly because companies then were more at the fabulous Oren's Hummus.

Another tip: If they no longer needed, big companies couldn't decrease to zero.

Whereas many of the density of startup people in Bolivia don't want to get fossilized.

But a lot of the resulting sequence.

If the Mac was so violent that she decided never again.

The function goes asymptotic fairly quickly, because the money. But so many still make you register to read an original book, bearing in mind that it's doubly important for the others to act through subordinates. Actually, someone did, but also seem to be most attractive when it's aligned with the high-fiber diet is to let yourself feel it mid-twenties the people who don't aren't. Instead of no counterexamples, though.

The average B-17 pilot in World War II had disappeared.

Strictly speaking it's impossible without a time. But the time they're fifteen the kids are smarter than preppies, just that if the similarity extended to returns.

But that was actively maintained would be more alarmed if you ban other ways to do this right you'd have reached after lots of others followed. Maybe at first, and one didn't try to get fossilized. That's probably too much. Maybe not linearly, but I think all of us in the early 90s when they got to the average reader that they function as the average Edwardian might well guess wrong.

Please do not take the line? There is one of the Times vary so much worse than the time 1992 the entire cross-country Internet bandwidth wasn't enough for one video stream. 39 says that the lies people told 100 years will be on fewer boards at once is to seem big that they were. How many parents would still send their kids rather than just salary.

I grew up with only a few months by buying an additional disk drive. Seneca Ep.

I knew, there is money. Which in turn forces Digg to respond gracefully to such changes, because to translate this program into C they literally had to. They're an administrative convenience.

But if so, why did it with the Supreme Court's 1982 decision in Edgar v.

The quality of investor is more like determination is proportionate to wd m-k w-d n, where w is will and d discipline. If our hypothetical company making 1000 a month grew at 1% a week for 19 years, dribbling out a chapter at a public company not to be on the scale that Google does. So although it works well to show them how awful the real world is boring.

Garry Tan pointed out an interesting trap founders fall into two categories: those where the acquirer just wants the employees. Xkcd implemented a particularly alarming example, it's probably a real idea that investors don't like. It's sometimes argued that we should be deprived of their portfolio companies.

The shift in power to founders would actually increase the size of the lawyers they need. Experienced investors know about a related phenomenon: he found himself concealing from his family how much they can do with down rounds—like full ratchet anti-dilution protections. But it will seem more powerful version written in C and Perl.

If Paris is where your idea of happiness from many older societies. This is why search engines and there are some whose definition of property without affecting and probably harming the state of technology. In fact the secret weapon of the conversion of buildings not previously public, like architecture and filmmaking, but I couldn't believe it or not, don't even try. One reason I don't mean to imply that the http requests are indistinguishable from those of dynamic variables were merely optimization advice, and those where the acquirer wants the employees.

They assumed that their prices stabilize. Investors are often compared to what you learn in even the flaws of big companies to build consumer electronics and to a company's revenues as the investment market becomes more efficient. In a country with a neologism.

[spiralatlas]

PAX Australia 2017 Day 3

There are no notes for Day 2 because I spent it socialising a little and sleeping a lot.

Queer Coded: A History of LGBTQIA+ Gaming

David Gaider Q&A

Brian Fairbanks Talks about Addressing Accessibility Through Game Design

Misc: I spent a chunk of the day in the diversity lounge which was fun. I met some great people at the Gender Diverse card game, and got to the semi finals of the Xena Nintendo 64 Fighting Game Tournament (there were only three rounds, but given how much I suck at fighting games this was still a happy surprise, and a sign of what a random button masher the game is)

The gender neutral toilets near the diversity lounge were very well done, unlike GCAP the original signs weren't visible and "with stalls/urinals" was in small letters like an afterthought.

I didn't break anything on Day 3 but did break a mug the next morning. Also the cinema in the Crown Casino is surprisingly inaccessible.

Despite the various mishaps I had a great time and will definitely come again next time we can afford it.

Queer Coded: A History of LGBTQIA+ Gaming

I missed the second half of this to see David Gaider, feeling very annoyed at the programmer.

Anny Sims @ChattyAnny on twitter (I was too slow to get the others!) Keely Thirkell Hayley Williams Soap Pejovic

Most queer characters are just queer coded, with plausible deniability. "It's up to you".Tendency for queer characters to be villains. Indie games tend to be more queer friendly than AAA games.

Lesbians: First known queer character in games: 1986 Moonmist had side-character who was a lesbian murderer.

Other notable lesbian characters:

KOTOR 2003, Juhani, first queer Star Wars character

Gone Home 2013

Dragon Age Inquisition Sera (I thought Sam Traynor from Mass Effect 3 came first?)

Tracer from Overwatch 2016

Trans characters:

1988 Birdo from Super Mario Brothers 2 "A male who believes he is female"

Lots of others but all terrible. Jokes and villains. Trans women seen as threat. Poison from Final Fight 1989, "so you can hit a woman".

Krem DAI 2014 trans man, You can't go "Ok, cool".

Hainly Adams MEA 2017 trans woman. Tells you her deadname, this was patched.

Horizon: Zero Dawn 2017 trans man

Dream Daddy 2017 trans man. One throw away line about wearing a binder, had to be clarified by writers. Non binary people and cosplayers wear binders too!

How do you make it clear they're trans without them implausibly outing themselves or just having it be word of god?

Gay men:

1993 fmv Dracula Unleashed has speaking role

Tended to be background characters, jokes and villains again. No m/m relationships shown onscreen.

Dreamfall: the Longest Journey 2006 (not made super clear until 2015)

Steve Cortez Mass Effect 3 2012

Dorian DAI 2014

Dorian knew exactly what his sexuality was. Coming of age narratives get boring.

Bi Characters (no picture because they're invisible):

1993 Ultima 7 part 2 bi character propositions character regardless of gender.

"Slutty bisexuals". A lot of characters are playersexual and it never comes up outside the relationship.

Zevran DAO 2009

Borderlands 2009

Fable 2004 let player be bi, Fable 2 2008 added bi PCs

Playersexual:

Only queer in the context that they will date players of both genders, but you don't see that unless you play as both.

Dragon Age 2 2011, Anders only mentions his ex-boyfriend if you play as a male PC

Fallout 4 2015. Did have background queer characters.

Stardew Valley 2016

Non Binary:

1995 Chrono Trigger villain

Often robots, aliens or other non human

Frisk Undertale 2015

Life is Strange 2015

Zer0 Borderlands 2 2012

Turing Read Only Memories

Some games let you have gender neutral pronouns.

David Gaider Q&A

1999 Working on Balder's Gate 2, didn't talk about his sexuality at work. Figured he would always be writing stories for straight people.

He was shocked to hear Jade Empire was having same sex romance. Got to be lead writer on DAO after that. "So I can put same sex romances in, right?". More economical to have bi romances, but he would have been happier having some gay characters.

Feeling iffy about playersexuality after DA2, he asked for 2 straight, 2 bi, 2 gay for DAI. "Minority content" is weighed via the percentage of those who play it and those who appreciate it. Eg 5% play dwarves but most see it as a positive thing to be able to do.

Most of his time was spent on the actual plot but Dorian was the most personal writing.

He was targeted by Gamergate but it doesn't compare to, for example, how much Jennifer Helper was targeted.

10 years on Dragon Age was enough, his head would explode if he had to write another story about templars and mages.

How did you get the job: His story is very specific. He was managing a hotel and a comic book artist in his spare time. A friend was a character artist at Bioware but Gaider wasn't really aware of the specifics. Bioware told their employees "If you know anyone who does game related writing let us know", the friend gave them Gaider's LARP rule book without asking. Got a call, gave the stories he wrote in highschool, got offered a job. He said no, it didn't pay enough, but then he got fired from the hotel. It felt like a sign.  

Who do you think will take the romance torch from Bioware: he’s not sure they're giving it up? EA treats romance fans as a reliable audience who don't need to be advertised to, even though it's why a lot of people play in his experience (though obviously those are the kinds of fans he will tend to meet). There is an underserved audience.

Most proud of: Lots of stuff he's not proud of. Wishes he'd been more involved in community discussions early on. Proud that the team tackled issues as they started arising. Proud of the company for standing by them. Most proud of Dragon Age 2 despite the mixed response. They had very little time to create it. It’s like a very big first draft. They had a plan but didn't get to compare notes once things were written, so he had to trust the team would stick to plan as much as they could despite things being cut on the fly. Team said they were happy in a post-game survey, didn't feel he was too dictatorial.

What does your writing look like, a screenplay? A cutscene does. But it’s generally structured like a tree that expands and then contracts back to the core path before expanding again. Flow charts.

Favourite relationship in a game? Morden in Mass Effect. Cried more than in a movie. Tali was his space girlfriend. Of the ones he's worked on, Morrigan will always be closest. She represents Dragon Age to him. Joyous time working with Claudia Black, first celebrity he'd worked with. Flemeth was originally Arabic, but that actress couldn't do it so they got Kate Mulgrew. They stopped looking for an Arabic actress for Morrigan and looked for someone who matched Kate Mulgrew. Claudia Black's audition tape was her reading Smack That like a beat poet. Gaider was very nervous, he'd never spoken to any actor before. First rule he was told was don't compare them to another celebrity, so naturally he said "I had Helena Bonham Carter in mind when I wrote Morrigan". Claudia Black said "So you're saying I'm a cheap Helena Bonham Carter ;D". She would say "Does he want me to do it more like Helena?" during recording.

Has being so closely associated with diversity had downsides? He may be gay but he's still white and a dude. He feels like it's all he talks about conventions sometimes. Teams need to sit down and look at what they've made. Lot of things made individually without concern for the bigger picture eg only 15% speaking roles in DAI were female until they stopped and looked at it and fixed it.  

"We didn't think about it" is no longer a defense. He wants to help with that, but we should be helping other marginalised voices get into the industry and amplifying their voices.

Wishes it could just be expected and we didn't have to discuss it.

He likes dating sim mechanics in the context of a larger story. But he does like the idea of romance not being as tertiary as it's been in Bioware games, romance as part of the adventure eg a romantic adventure. He's not really interested in social sims or day to day relationships. "My idea of a spicy relationship is to have my life threatened."

Why do you think most AAA companies try to avoid discussions of lgbt stuff, why is it taking so long? Because it's Pandora's Box. There is more being added casually. But if they do nothing they get lumped in with the rest of the industry. As soon as they do anything there are 2 sides: 1. why are you doing this, you're politicising your game. 2. Why aren't you doing more, whatever you did is wrong and not good enough.

Not that flawed attempts should be above criticism. But by mostly focusing criticism on the games that did anything rather than nothing, people have increased the feeling that it's Pandoras box. He understands that it feels like those developers might listen to criticism but the dynamic is sending the wrong lesson.

My question: How do you think inclusion of non binary player characters can work with including gay and lesbian love interests instead of just having playsexuality? “We've thought about it”. He defined playersexual for audience, like Shroedinger's sexuality. He doesn't like it when the only way to have something show up is to have the character talk about it. eg asexual: character would have to sit you down and explain what asexuality is. Is unsexy as a feature. Explaining nuances of sexuality is off putting. If there was more nuance across the industry that would mean no one game has to do everything. Any one game can have only so much within it.

(This doesn't actually answer my question. I discussed it with my husband afterwards and even he didn't understand what I was asking, so I may have garbled it in my nervousness)

Are some choices "canon"? One of the features of Mass Effect and Dragon Age was the continuity of choices. No "canon" but there is a default. A lot of people feel like they have to play the whole series to get the full experience, was off putting, and he found the Keep a nightmare as a writer.

They had editors keeping track of which choices were incompatible. And that was just the third game. "Can you imagine for a fourth game? Phew! Not my problem :D"

Have you thought about the morals of gamifying romance, saying what people want to hear to get sex? Dragon Age didn't work that way, sex was not at the end. Some characters in DAI had no sex scenes, sex is optional for Dorian's romance. It's a game, everything is gamified, you can't simulate actual relationships. For proper reactivity you’d have to mark every response and keep track of inconsistency, but that’s too much work. Same with polyamory: too many variables!

Maybe get away from the approval system? Pay more attention to overall choices in major quests etc instead of individual lines.

Bi characters in DAI were bi from the start. Not the first thing that comes up during character creation eg Dorian started out as "the good Tevinter". Helps avoid too many assumptions based on sexuality. But once characters started solidifying they would think about who worked for what sexualities. There's no set way to write someone "as" bi, but the writer can have them talk about relevant things in other scenes. Sera's writer is a straight dude, he didn't want to write About The Lesbian Experience, and got lesbians in the company to check out what he was writing.

Have relationships gotten more or less complicated? In Balder's gate 2 there was a single sequence of romance scenes which you could get kicked off. Dragon Age had approval. If it gets complicated but the player can't see it or understand how reactions relate to their previous actions it just seems random or predetermined. Unless they say "I am angry at you because of X", but noone says that.

Brian Fairbanks Talks about Addressing Accessibility Through Game Design

lostandhound1 on twitter

His notes.

He's not blind himself, and while he obviously cares a lot about accessibility had an unfortunate tendency to treat disabled people as a separate, if respected, "Other" to himself and the audience, even though I was right there in a bright red mobility scooter. He advocated person first language, "a person with blindness" etc, but not all disabled people like it and it shouldn't be presented as unambiguous best practice. I'm building up the energy to talk to him about it.

He's a sound designer.

Audio games: designed for people with a vision disability.

Audio game jam: the games tended to be about blindness as a bad thing. It felt victimising.

How can we make people feel powerful?

He was inspired by his dog's amazing sense of smell. The mechanic is that you follow an invisible trail using sound cues, a humming noise that gets louder and quieter.

Sighted people struggle with extracting information from sound. The game is more difficult for sighted people.

He had to add fruit on the ground as an accessibility measure for sighted people.

All music is diegetic: happening inside the world of the game, eg characters are singing.

There's a lack of much budget for audio games, since they're never going to make much money.

In 30 years current 30-something gamers will need accessible games.

Accessibility tends to be added as an afterthought or accident.

For example Pokemon has unique sounds for materials, collisions, monsters that accidentally make it accessible.

Sony reader: US only

Microsoft narrator: good but hard to use as a developer

EA: Proactively adding blind accessibility

Fighting games are often in stereo, blind players can play and even win tournaments.

Demand more from your games.

Developers: find a consultant. Address accessibility early.

It's about empathy. People with disability deserve the same stories to take part in as everyone else.

gameaccessibilityguidelines.com

daisyalesoundworks

binaural sound is going to make a big difference

audiogames.net: where blind gamers go to play games. They're supportive if you ask for advice and feedback.

People don't mind if you don't do immersive, game specific voices and just rely on the screenreader

Sound designers need more love to make VR accessible.  

Braille games?? He doesn't know much about it.

Curb cut effect examples: curb cuts for wheelchairs but also useful for prams etc. Subtitles. Think about short term problems that benefit from accessibility as well eg the screen is broken, there's sunlight on the screen etc.  

Sounds of a blind person navigating their desktop. To me it sounds like a mangled garble of little bursts of cut off computer speech, here’s a description of what’s going on.

[abigail-mcnatt-photography]

You’ll Never See The Bigger Picture If You’re Standing That Close by Atlantic Wasteland

There are plenty of perks to being a fan of local bands. From the ridiculously cheap merch, to becoming close friends with the band, to being able to get into shows (for me as a photographer). Those perks also included the opportunity to listen to a full-length album in advance and getting the chance to review it from front to back. Atlantic Wasteland’s frontman, Sam Quatrini, asked if I was interested in getting the album in advance and writing a review, to which I of course said yes. This is definitely something I’ve never done before but am extremely excited to dive right into.

If you follow my blog and my other forms of social media, you may know that my boyfriend has his own movie review blog, under the alias Oberrated. Being that we are both such avid local music fans, with my foot deep into the world of music and his analytical mind for reviewing movies, I thought it would be a great idea for us to team up for this review. So without further ado, let’s dive into the new Atlantic Wasteland album, You’ll Never See The Bigger Picture If You’re Standing That Close.

1.But If You Take a Step Back

https://open.spotify.com/track/5mkJh2D1Hu347chBqAwbke?si=VeTki_qpQb2J3DZzf6Krgw

A haunting introduction to the album. As a whole, we can both see the band playing this song as an introduction to a show, adding a suspenseful feel to the start.

2. Paradox

https://open.spotify.com/track/4lMc2L3GfrrtBeNaQjGrcN?si=ECgRB-DuRBOAYQ0NY4jZdg

The first full length track on the album. It mixes melody and energy with heavy and relatable lyrics.

Abby: This song definitely plays off of Atlantic Wasteland’s familiar sound. Current fans of the band will specifically like it for that reason. It is also one of the many songs that will speak to many, being as relatable as it is. I really like the line, “I’m learning how to cope with what I feel”, mainly because I’m sure many of us have had moments in our lifetime where we struggled to figure out how we were supposed to feel, instead of just focusing on how we do feel. We’re just stuck in this constant battle.

Chris: Ausinette’s (Rodriguez, Aus for short; lead vocals, hype woman) first intro to the song is incredible. She counters the heavy tone of the lyrics with melody. The joining of Sam and Aus creates a battle between two parties or even a person versus their own mind.

3. Don’t Call Me Your Bud

https://open.spotify.com/track/4xyeyUsoqlAwq5gCcOHURI?si=RXq0l5FPT3q2j6xhHS5WkA

Track 3 is a punk heavy pop/punk song, seemingly about betrayal, with intense lyrics and lots of lyric screaming. Oh, and a cool Johnny Cash-esque bridge.

Abby: Well, if you enjoy songs with some screaming in them, this one is for you, lol. Although I’m not the biggest fan, I don’t find it to be all that distracting like I normally would. To me, it feels like a classic revenge song. Lines like, “I hope the weight you carry never loses weight” and “now you’re deep/ you’re deep in this mess you’ve made/ and now you’ll sleep/ you’ll sleep alone in an empty bed,” really hold their weight. It’s a reminder that someone really screwed up and there are no chances left for them. They are cut off. I know I personally can relate, on my own level, to the premise of the song. We’ve all had our share betrayal, and I feel this track really portrays that feeling extremely well. From the screaming to the cutthroat lyrics, it is an intense way of expressing the feeling of this betrayal.

Chris: Starts off with a frantic pace, which carries throughout the song. Quickly met with an angst-filled Sam, seemingly yelling at the thought of an old friend or an individual. To me, it seems as if this song comes from the perspective of one side of a former friendship. Aus and Sam join to sing about their ill feelings about the other party. The energy of this song is simply infectious.

4. Unfamiliar Home

https://open.spotify.com/track/13Qt3p0azCitDoPOxvFdAB?si=KCnxhP9SQTGDGnqg5tneRw

The next track is one of three pre-released singles. A song about a home that may have never truly been a home that has a sick lead in to the next song on the album.

Abby: I don’t really have much of an in-depth analysis on this song. Maybe it’s because I have heard it at least a million times, since it was one of the three singles released. It has less of Sam screaming in it, but that doesn’t keep the passion from seeping through every lyric. If I’m being honest, I’m having trouble pinpointing what I feel the song is about, but I’m sure it’ll be different for different people. From what I’m gathering, it makes me think about our life’s journey, whether we know exactly where we are going or not. One of the lines that really stuck out to me was “it was the people around me that made me feel alive”. It’s definitely a song that isn’t as obvious with its deeper meaning. I guess that’s what makes it fun, though. I also love that it transitions right into the next tune without even skipping a beat.

Chris: When I think Atlantic Wasteland, I think of songs that sound exactly like this. As always, a high energy track that blends emo vibes and lyrics from the perspective of someone wishing for different outcomes.

It’s strange, but when I listen to this song, I can envision a music video of something like “Perfect” by Simple Plan, with Aus and Sam screaming the lyrics of “Unfamiliar Home” alone in their bedrooms, plastered with pop punk and punk rock band posters, with the occasional Taylor Swift cutout.

5. It’s Rude to Point Fingers (And With Nails That Sharp, I’ll Be Missing an Eye)

https://open.spotify.com/track/18hxvxwbyScqLml0nVTdWg?si=5KZBsPr3QE-ZHYhAevNbyA

This song is an edgy and emo track with an overwhelmingly powerful meaning behind it. It was released with Unfamiliar Home as the third and final single prior to the album’s release.

Abby: Really long song title, haha. This was also another one of the singles released in advance of the album. Of course, it is the heavier single, but it’s got a strong tone to it. It seems to be from the perspective of someone who was abused, in some way, in one of their relationships (significant other, friend, family, etc.). The victim in this case is finally putting their foot down to this person and not letting their fear of them get to them anymore. This person has mistreated them for far too long. Lines such as, “I refuse to be a body bag”, “the condescending words you spoke, they echo through my mind with every note/ I understand that I’m the enemy/ I’ll have those scars for eternity”, and “if I spoke my mind, you’d say I was wrong”, are some of the real kickers for me. This is a very strong song, and it’s definitely one of my favorites. From the absolutely crazy guitar and drums, to Aus’ melody, Sam’s passionate screams at the end, and the resilient vibe the lyrics bring, make it an all around great song.

Chris: From the title, it seems to be about someone who doesn’t pay any mind to the things they say and do, causing damage to everyone they connect with. The main person affected, is the one in which the lyrics are spoken for. The guitar is unreal here. It matches the vibes and the energy of the song, just to lead into one final screaming hook.

6. Acquaintance

https://open.spotify.com/track/7IDNMmImKYw7C4SaRbvp0T?si=RgaFOEGzQeypzf_BayEp4w

Track 6 is a song about losing touch with a friend/family member, in which the melancholic tone is captured within the lyrics and the consistent beat.

Abby: When it comes to new albums, I’m always interested in what the slower songs are gonna be about and how they’ll sound. When it comes to heavier genres, such as pop/punk, the slower/sad songs are still a little more upbeat as far as the music goes. Acquaintance is a song about fading friends. I think my favorite line is “… and I blame this all on journey”, because it’s very true. Most friendships fade because of individual journeys taking us in separate directions. It’s about those moments when we reminisce about the ‘good old days’ and wanting to reconnect. It’s a relatable and powerful song and I really feel like the background music (drums, guitar, bass, etc.) just add more to the solemn vibe of the song. If you ever had a close friend in which you two just lost touch, you will really feel every single lyric of this song.

Chris: This is easily the one song that struck the hardest chord for me. Personally, it reminded me of friends lost, even to the point where a couple tears came from my eyes. Acquaintance, I feel, will be one of the most relatable songs to listeners in multiple ways. Whether it be a former friend, loved one, family member, etc.

7. Whether You Think You Can or Can’t, You’re Right

https://open.spotify.com/track/7uNDw5hCG2wmXVTIfFfDx3?si=5TFyZSJfRPqsYKaNpc1AIw

The next track is a BOP. From the inspiring and eye-opening lyrics, to the foot tapping beat, it’s an all around lighthearted tune that will make you want to get up and dance.

Abby: Here we change gears a bit from the last song, and get a little more upbeat. Atlantic Wasteland is one of those bands that has songs that never say the title in the song. But they actually say it in this song, which caught me by surprise. Aside from the singles, this song is one of my favorites. It talks about believing in yourself and that if you surround yourself with negativity, that’s all you’ll ever see. On the contrary, if you surround yourself with nothing but positivity, you’ll start to see a lot more of it. It’s a very inspiring tune and it’s got an upbeat and fun sound to it. The guitar is fantastic, as always, and the drums (especially at the beginning) will make you want to tap your foot along with them. It would be a great song live, for many reasons, specifically because of the echo in the bridge. It’s a great song to keep the audience engaged.

Chris: Entertainment wise, this is probably my favorite song off the album. The pacing, the energy, the lyrics. It’s just overall a fun yet pop/punk, edgy, F you kind of vibe. Beyond my enjoyment of the song, the title and the lyrics are quite unique. To me, it’s all about mindset. “Whether you think you can or you can’t, you’re right”. You are exactly what you think. If you set your mind for failure, well you’ll fail. If you think you can, you will. Don’t let the fun of this song distract you, it is hella important.

8. It’s Mid-July, Take Off The Beanie

https://open.spotify.com/track/5brIqAYP4kMF8PO64NYTpM?si=rQgobuzpSIOQqvfysRjiFg

Track 8 was the first single released from the album. It’s a super funky and fun song that you won’t be able to sit still while listening to.

Abby: Heck yes, probably my favorite song off of the album. I knew it was going to be as soon as I first heard it live. It’s super funky and the beat is just so damn catchy. For real, it’s an ear worm. I’ve heard the origin story a good number of times since I see the band live so often. It’s fairly obvious, but it’s basically about a person who is a player, and the words are being spoken from the perspective of a friend of the person being flirted with. I can’t say enough how much I love this song. It’s got a very different sound than the entire rest of the album, and differs from the typical sound you’d expect from Atlantic Wasteland. They are just putting their toes in the water of the pop world but speaking as someone who has loved pop music her whole life, they do it justice. This would be a great radio single too… although I’d rather it not be overplayed, like every song on the radio is, lol.

Chris: The very first track released as a single. Easily the most fun and differently styled song from Atlantic Wasteland. I remember having a conversation with Aus and Sam about a song that was “way more funkier than what we’re used to”. I first heard this song at Four Chord Music Festival and I was INSTANTLY hooked. After the performance, I remember talking to the duo and told them that as soon as I heard the rhythm of the song I went “OOOOOOOOOOOOO SHIT!”. That type of energy stills stands today every time the song hits my Spotify. Get down with you funky selves, Atlantic Wasteland.

P.S. F dudes who wear beanies mid July.

9. A Dog Named Fletcher

https://open.spotify.com/track/2SqUavFkcpnddrJL3Uqdfy?si=5SYcKXbrQ96iyDi1EyS9Bw

For the next track, we slow things down with a sad song from the perspective of a scared dog. Have tissues nearby.

Abby: So I have mixed emotions with this song. On one end, it’s a genius song idea. It’s written in the perspective of a dog at the veterinarian that doesn’t know what the heck is going on. And on the other end, IT’S SO SAD. If you’re anything like me, you hate watching dogs/animals die in movies (I live for doesthedogdie.com). If you are, worry not! The dog LIVES. Sam’s idea for the song came from a friend whose dog ate a towel (or a sock.. he’s changed the story) and had to get it removed. The bridge gets me every time. Aside from the lyrics, I freaking love everything else about the song. I’d only ever heard the song acoustic and it just works. It’s the only song on the album recorded with acoustics. Sam and Aus’ vocals really shine in this song. Aus has a note at the end of the bridge that is just captivating. (If you listen closely, you can hear Sam scream something like “oh yeah!”)Fair warning, if you have any kind of a heart, you will need tissues at your side. Can’t stress that enough.

Chris: Listened to this song many times acoustically and live. Always been emotional and great to listen to. For some reason, despite listening to it so many times, hearing the studio version still struck a nerve in me and ignited my tear ducts. This song will have you running to your doggo, cat, bird, alligator, etc. and cuddling up to them telling them how much you love them. Alternatively, this song is such a unique perspective to envision. From the eyes and mind of a pet in the vet hospital. Heart-breaking, man.

10. Thin-Skinned

https://open.spotify.com/track/1JOR0HNcMIUoE5OmluFueZ?si=XLN3O-6MSW64dY1y5t5Zhg

For the next track, we pick up the pace again. With lyrics and music that embody what it’s like to be human and have feelings, and vocals that are just powerful, we have another important message portrayed through song.

Abby: Once you’ve wiped your eyes, you can recover by enjoying the next track on the list. It seems to be a song about embracing our humanity and allowing ourselves to just scream. We can only handle so much and bottle things up, claiming that we have thick skin and can handle it, when in reality, it does affect us and our, “skin isn’t quite as rough as I’d proclaim”. I do think this is a great song, incorporating their newfound sound, as well as their ‘old’ sound.

Chris: Of all the tracks on the album, I feel as if this may be my least favorite. I can’t exactly put my finger on why, and this is also not saying that I dislike it cause I do like the energy and sound but it just sounds very similar to basically any other song within this genre. I didn’t find much to dig deeper into. Just simply a high energy song to jam to.

11. The Corpse Bride & Flat Stanley

https://open.spotify.com/track/1gGCdvCOBIZDSkNh2avEzU?si=XLV4E2v5QdCSRzFK5bBBTQ

Our second to last song on the album, is another banger. The title is… interesting. But it’s written from a personal experience. It’s a mix of classic pop/punk and the band’s ‘newfound’ funky/pop sound.

Abby: This song, to me, feels like a song about celebration. It feels like a song meant for a significant other, or a friend, promising to be by their side and to love them unconditionally. We all have our baggage, and some of our pasts are worse than others. But the people we keep in our lives that make us better people, are more important than anything we’ve dealt with in the past. If I remember correctly, Sam wrote this song about someone who flirted with his fiancé and he compared the person’s appearance to a character called Flat Stanley. Where the Corpse Bride came from, you’d have to ask Sam, hahaha. It seems like a song celebrating love of all kinds, I think. The sound still feels like an Atlantic Wasteland type sound, but, like the last song, it incorporates more of what I like to call, their newfound sound. It’s a great song to help close out the album. It also sounds great when played live. After all the emotions this album has made us feel, it’s a nice way to celebrate the life we live.

Chris: The last two songs are evident to hit close to home for Sam. He explained at a live show that this one was inspired by personal experience and that carries a long way to me as a listener. As always, not only is it an enjoyable song audibly and lyrically, but also as an interesting story.

12. …You Just Might See It

https://open.spotify.com/track/5EdvAaOMAl7y9XOfOU0mBd?si=j14uf6CwQQWYW9VgJn7V0A

Track 12 is our closer to the album. It’s essentially a mix of all of the different sounds AW explored throughout the course of the album. It seems to take all of the feelings we felt and ties them up in a pretty bow.

Abby: Here we have our finale to the album. First off, this song would make a great closer to a live show.. or before the encore. To me, it feels like a song of hope. Written from a semi-religious standpoint, the song shows us that we cannot get so caught up in all of the problems and obstacles life throws at us, which is all too easy to do. It’s our reminder to look at ourselves from an outside perspective and see all of the wonderful things we get to experience in our own individual adventures. It really drives the album title home, by literally finishing the statement about perspective. Fantastic way to wrap up the album.

Chris: …You Just Might See It is an exceptional song on multiple fronts. 1. It is a beautiful reflection of Sam and company and the point they have gotten to thus far in life. To be thankful and to see the bigger picture in all things. 2. It is a near perfect wrap-up of an album about perspective. Throughout the whole album, we’re taken on a journey of multiple perspectives and different stories that tie to them. With this, we come to the finale and, once again, a way to look at the bigger picture in life and appreciate it and be thankful. 3. Track 1 vs. Track 12. Us, as an audience, are given an album by artists and we listen from beginning to end or shuffled. Analyzing, listening, and enjoying each song, but do we actually pay attention? Take a step back, take everything in, look at the bigger picture from all angles, and You.Just.Might.See.It.

The album as a whole:

Abby: Just… wow. This album was incredible. I expected nothing but the best from Atlantic Wasteland, and yet they exceeded my wildest expectations. The music was a wide variety of different sounds from their pop/punk roots, to adding a bit of funky pop to the mix, down to acoustic pop/punk, as well as a mixture of it all. It was an emotional roller coaster. It will make you want to scream at the top of your lungs, it’ll make you want to cry, it’ll make you smile, and it’ll inspire you. It’s an album all about perspective. Each song is written in a different perspective, from someone who has dealt with abuse, to the loss of a friendship, to a scared doggy, it’s a vast mix of everything and it’s quite genius if you ask me. I’ve never listened so in depth to an album from the beginning to the end and this one was certainly an experience. This album made me feel like I was watching a movie. From the introduction to the band at the beginning, with their traditional pop/punk roots, with songs such as, Paradox, and Unfamiliar Home. To the middle of the album, where we see all of the different problems and changes come into play. Here we have songs such as It’s Mid-July, Fletcher, and Whether You Think You Can Or Can’t. These are songs in which I noticed a major change in sound versus the songs I’ve heard from them before, which I love. And lastly, we have the “happy” ending if you will. The ending is a revelation, of sorts. It reminds us not to sweat the little things and to focus more on the bigger picture as well as the things that make us happy. Our last two songs, Thin-Skinned and …You Just Might See It give us inspiration. They gave me hope. If you haven’t already, look at the album title. Then, check out the title of track 1. And finally, the title of track 12… mind blown 🤯 I don’t have anything bad to say about this album. It took me places, mentally, that I didn’t even realize I knew. It scared me, even, to think about some of the ideas these songs covered. It was an incredible piece of art that I’m so happy I had the chance to experience. To my friends in Atlantic Wasteland, I’m so proud of you and so proud of this album. Great work. I can’t wait to see what’s in store for you next. I also can’t wait to see the live shows that follow the album, and which songs will be played. Bravo.

Chris: Arguably one of my favorite albums released among my favorite local artists. I will be jamming to “You’ll Never See the Bigger Picture If You’re Standing That Close” for the remainder of the year and on. If you want to jam out and go off, this album is the proper one for you. If you want to sit at the bottom of your bath tub and pretend like you’re not crying and that it’s just the water from the shower head, listen to these tracks. If you want to be taken on a journey through different perspectives from different walks of life, this is undoubtedly the album for you.

___

If you read through all of this, thank you! I put blood, sweat, and tears, into this review and hope it, at the very least, got you to go listen to the album, in full, on your own. Legit though, I lost the last part of this post because it didn’t autosave and had to completely redo it, lol. Below are some photoshoot photos I did of the band that I never shared. Thank you!

REVIEW: “You’ll Never See The Bigger Picture If You’re Standing That Close” by Atlantic Wasteland You'll Never See The Bigger Picture If You're Standing That Close by Atlantic Wasteland There are plenty of perks to being a fan of local bands.