#also why does he have a well defined....six pack?

[deathandnonexistentialdread]

why is he shirtless

[annebd]

winter warmers, day 15: roleplay. ~950 words. credit to @girlsdads' tags on this post for the idea!

When Max opens the door, he thinks that there must have been some sort of mistake. He’d called down to Jean-Luc, the concierge of the apartment building, earlier this morning because Max had a leaky kitchen sink and he wondered if Jean-Luc could recommend a repairman. Jean-Luc had given him a number of someone to call; Daniel, he’d said. Great guy, does good work, doesn’t charge an arm and a leg for a simple call out. But when Max opens his door and sees the man in front of him, he wonders if Jean-Luc hadn’t been having a laugh and given him the name of an escort agency instead.

Daniel is gorgeous, with big brown eyes and a mop of dark curls. He’s wearing a white t-shirt so threadbare that Max can see the dark shadow of his nipples through it and, if he squints, the outline of a well-defined set of abs. The t-shirt is also so long and his shorts so short, that below the hem of his shirt, all Max can see is the toned length of his legs. His thighs are colorful with a smattering of tattoos. He’s wearing an old pair of Vans, grey, with no show socks that only serve to further highlight the naked length of his tanned legs.

He’s carrying a small tool bag, which can’t be big enough to contain much more than a single screwdriver. There’s no way that he’s going to be able to fix a busted sink with that.

Max has been staring for long enough that the smile on Daniel’s face falters when he asks “Are you Mr. Verstappen? I’m Daniel; we spoke on the phone earlier. About the leak?”

Max shakes himself out of his thoughts. “Yes, that’s me. I’m Max. Come in, please.”

He steps aside and waves Daniel in. “The sink is just through here. It broke this morning, I think. It is leaking all over.”

They walk through the apartment to the kitchen, where the drip drip drip of the sink provides the only soundtrack to an otherwise quiet afternoon.

“Ah,” says Daniel. “Yes, I’ve seen this before. Quite common, actually. Let me take a look.”

He opens the cabinet beneath the sink and peers inside, to check the pipes underneath, Max assumes.

“Hmm,” Daniel says. “Yes, I see. Alrighty, let’s get in there.”

He stands up and, without any fanfare, removes his shirt. Max startles as he’s confronted with the high-def evidence of exactly what he’d suspected earlier: a perfectly defined six pack and dark nipples that wouldn’t look amiss with a bite mark or two around them. Daniel’s chest is lightly fuzzed, and Max imagines what it would feel like to run his tongue along the planes of his pecs. But still, this can’t be proper repairman protocol. “Why did you? What are you doing?”

“Oh, right. I just thought it’d be better this way, in case the leak gets worse, you know? Don’t wanna have to walk out of here like it’s a wet t-shirt contest. You don’t mind, do you?”

Max gulps, audibly. “Um,” he says. “No, no, I don’t mind. It’s fine. You should be comfortable. Um, thank you?”

Daniel winks. “Don’t thank me yet, mate. Let’s get this all fixed first.”

He opens his tool bag which contains, as Max suspected, a single screwdriver, and gets down onto the tiled floor to lay on his back under the sink. He’s got his knees bent and his legs spread wide, the combination of which gives Max a perfect view down the inside of his shorts leg. And a perfect view of the fact that he’s not wearing any underwear.

“Oh,” Max breathes.

“Everything all right there, Mr. Verstappen?” Daniel asks.

“Yes. I… yes. But I think maybe that we should-”

Max isn’t sure what he’s about to suggest. Perhaps Daniel won’t mind if Max takes this moment to rip those shorts off completely and swallow his cock, which appears to be rapidly hardening in his tiny shorts, to the root. Or perhaps he’d like to bend Max over the countertop and fuck him until he’s crying and coming and leaking more than the sink is. Or perhaps…

Before he can offer any of those suggestions, though, Jimmy leaps down delicately from the counter and lands right next to Daniel’s hip. He assesses the situation for a moment and then steps right onto Daniel’s perfect six pack and curls into a little ball on his tummy, where he promptly falls asleep in that instantaneous way that only cats can.

Daniel laughs. “Oh come on, JimJams. Are you serious? You’re ruining the mood here, bubs.”

Max has no choice but to laugh, too. If Daniel were a real handyman, Jimmy wouldn’t have anything to do with him. He and Sassy would have been ensconced firmly underneath Max’s bed and would have watched suspiciously until he’d left.

Daniel sits up and cuddles Jimmy into his arms. He deposits him right next to Sassy on the cat tree in the corner and smiles as they snuggle together in a beam of afternoon sun.

“Well, Mr. Verstappen,” he says, turning back to Max. “I think it’s fair to say that your leak is all fixed. Now, we��ll need to discuss my service fee. It won’t be cheap.”

Max grins and pulls off his own t-shirt. He loops his arms around Daniel’s neck and pulls him in for a kiss. “How about I pay you back with a bit of servicing of my own?”

“I reckon we can make that work,” Daniel replies and grabs Max’s hand to lead him back to their bedroom, where he makes sure to close the door behind them. No cats allowed.

[m1ckeyb3rry]

Nagi's butt.

you know this is only tangentially related but it reminded me that something i’ve always found funny is that everyone finds it super unrealistic that nagi has really defined muscles but based on what we know about him it actually makes sense for him to look that way because muscle DEFINITION is more related to body fat percentage than anything. so like that’s why body builders go on cycles of bulking/cutting and why they’re often very hefty looking most of the time — in order to build muscle at that pace, you have to eat a shit ton of food or else your body will actually burn your muscles for energy as well as fat, so they’ll bulk in order to have enough calories to lift heavy, and then when they want to look aesthetic (ex for competitions) they’ll cut their food intake so that their body fat percentage rapidly drops and the muscles that they’ve built become visible!! this is especially true for abs LMAOO back in high school my best friend competed in gymnastics nationally and also rode horses but she never had incredibly visible abs. meanwhile my younger brother literally just runs cross country and his abs are crazy despite the fact that he never trains them but it’s literally because his body fat percentage is so low that they’re always visible — this is why exercises designed to target your abs to make your waist narrower or give you a six pack do not really work and are the cause of many people giving up on exercising (although i always say health benefits >>> aesthetics but eh everyone has their reasons)

anyways so given nagi’s general dissatisfaction with eating he probably has a CRAZY low body fat percentage (likely too low to even maintain his body weight until reo/bllk/chris prince intervened) which means whatever muscles he does have will be incredibly visible as there’s literally nothing to cover them. this is actually kinda evident in the earlier parts of the manga — if you compare second selection-era nagi with, say, reo, zantetsu, or karasu (since i know off the top of my head that we have shirtless panels of all three of them either from the main manga or epinagi and they’re in a similar height range — isagi/chigiri are much smaller so they don’t serve as good comparisons and kunigami/barou are on a diff level entirely LMAOO) at around the same time, you’ll see that each individual muscle of nagi’s is more defined, but all three of the formerly mentioned characters are broader and have bigger chests/biceps/thighs than nagi does as they all likely eat more than he does in a day. this difference is mitigated as the series goes on and nagi is probably forced to gets a better nutrition plan as well as exercises a lot more but uhhh yeah. actually idrk what the point of all of that was pretend i said smth profound 😭

ANWAYS yeah he def gets his squat reps in 🙂‍↕️ he looks so good in the manshine kit that i can almost forgive the british for everything they’ve done to my ancestors

[kuroo-hitsuji]

This is a prompt to talk about Lucifer and Satan purring (!!!!!) and body types??

Woo thank you !!

Starting with body types bc i think it will be shorter than the purring (i have. Many thoughts about the purring lmao). They're admittedly not drastically different from the models, I'm constantly at war with my brain between Canon Compliance and creative liberties ahzhsjxh but its a lot of smaller details, i hope its not disappointing at all orz

Lucifer - ironically his body type is the most difficult one for me to describe shdhhd he's just kind of a Fit Guy tm. Like he's got decently defined muscles and the slight dorito shape from his shoudlers/chest to his waist that you expect from anime men lmao. But he's not shredded, no washboard abs or anything (but relatively toned still, could be a six-pack if he's deliberately flexing lmao), the most defined muscles are in his arms and chest, primarily. Also he's got long-ass legs, idk why he is just ⅔ leg and i cannot unsee it

Satan - lean muscle and pretty boxy, the shoulder to waist to hip ratio isn't all that drastic, not a lot of chest muscle and again lean but not shredded ab region (using the flexing concept again I'd put him at a 4 pack lol) but also more visibly defined than Lucifer's at rest as well due to a slightly lower fat percentage. Also he has like no ass and I'll die on this hill (the first obey me post i ever saw was someone calling him out for having a flat ass in a chat picture and it has stuck with me the entire 4 years 💀 not slander btw we support all booties here). He's just very square/rectangle coded in my mind for inexplicable reasons

Demons purring is a headcanon I'm constantly dying to talk about Thank You 🙏 i hope these are actually like afjsjg decently coherent, they got long (as expected but still)

Lucifer - witnessing him purr at all is Exceptional rare (hearing it is even less common) for a combination of reasons that mostly boil down to his general commitment to his reputation and him being reluctant to show vulnerability at most times (and in this specific case its exacerbated by the fact that he was not Always a demon and the ability to purr in the first place is relatively foreign to him). He's put in the work to keep a handle on it as much as he can, and to keep it silent when he can't (control, control, control), and outside of him practicing that alone the most common instances of it happening have been when he's with MC, or when he's Very drunk and in good/safe company (diavolo, primarily. Lucifer is still hesitant to fully drop his facade with him, but it's been slowly melting away over the centuries. Diavolo does his absolute best not to call attention to the purring in the very rare instance that he even notices it occurring, but it is an absolutely herculean feat for him lmao). Generally the only time it's at all audible is with MC, in those rare perfect moments that let him feel safe and cozy enough to fully relax, often with the help of cuddling and petting his hair, wings, or the base of his horns. Even then it's quiet, a low, deep rumble somewhere between what you'd expect from a panther or other big cat (if they were actually able to purr) and the kind of sound a small tremor of an earthquake makes, where you might not realize you're even hearing anything at first but you can Feel your eardrums vibrating anyways.

Satan - also purrs very infrequently, for a few similar reasons but also wildly different ones. He's more accustomed to it as a general ability, having never had a body that was unable to purr in the first place, but he's still not incredibly familiar with it for a while. He did it instinctively as a self-soothing method at first, back when he was still out of control and would get locked in his room for the safety of himself and others, doing it less the more he gets a hold on his wrath, associating it with the consequences of a loss of control rather than positive emotions. It's not until he becomes attached to and knowledgeable about cats that he starts seeing it in a different light, eventually allowing himself to give into the urge to purr occasionally without feeling bad about it, but with this a different problem arises: having something so in common with cats has him almost too giddy, to the extent that when he starts purring he struggles to stop, so he still represses it most of the time. He purrs most often completely alone in his room where there will be minimal consequences to him getting stuck in a happy-stim feedback loop for an hour or two if it does happen, and he's still a bit embarrassed about the idea of this happening in front of MC for a good while, but not totally against it.

His purr tends to be a bit stilted and not particularly deep in pitch, waves of it more clearly following his breathing. It's not loud but its not really quiet either, and he's never really been successful at trying to control anything about it other than completely suppressing it, adding to the list of reasons he can't do it stealthily in day to day life as some other demons might be able to (purring loudly in public is seen as vaguely inappropriate, not really in a big way but kind of the same vibes as crying in public in most human settings. You won't get in trouble or anything but its one of those things most people feel more comfortable with keeping private).

I think I covered everything but if not I'll probably end up adding anything I couldve missed whenever i actually remember it lol

Thanks again for the chance to infodump :)

[forthesanityofstorytellers]

15 Tags 15 Mutuals

Tagged by @bloodlessheirbyjacques

Ty! ❤️

I'll go ahead and do Becks. She's easily the one that's on my mind the most rn.

-----------

1. Are you named after anyone?

Pretty sure I was named after a plant. But my current name, no. It was chosen for me and then I chopped it up so it could be used either by me or my partner.

2. When was the last time you cried?

It depends. I cried when my girlfriend showed back up. Well. I teared up. Happy tears. She wasn't...there wasn't anything wrong. She's just been gone for a few weeks and I've...there's been a lot going on and I missed her.

If you mean cry cry...I had a vampiric-induced nightmare. Woke up and called my boyfriend and cried when he answered the phone because it was proof he hadn't packed up his things and left me.

3. Do you have kids?

Two. One that I birthed. That was...interesting. Neither one of them can seem to control their magic very well. It's easier with the older one, Lily, as she understands the context of her magic. My younger one is...uhm...Well let's put it this way. Lily just pulled free of a lock on her magic and has spent the last hundred or so years with barely any access and therefore barely any control. But she's learning. Misolis was born about...what, five or six months ago? Already looks somewhere between three and four. She just created four mud frogs and a mud snake and brought them to life, all using her magic, and is in the process of teaching the other little ones despite having barely any control of her own. She sort of listens to me and her da, is already finding and working loopholes to win arguments, and somehow believes that I lie and her da is incapable of the same...which would make you laugh if you knew us. She's got her own version of the world and can't be argued out of it once she's got an idea. She's...*sigh*...She's quite a little tornado of events.

But again...if you knew what family she came from, none of this would exactly be a surprise. Well. It would be but it wouldn't be.

4. Do you use sarcasm?

Me? No. I never do. Why on earth would I use sarcasm. It's not like it's hilarious in the right context and sometimes the only way to answer stupid questions. But no. Not me. I'm not sarcastic at all.

5. What's the first thing you notice about people?

Their magic. Or life signature. Body language tells me a lot. I guess the real answer about the first thing I notice about people is how many secrets they think they can keep from me.

6. What's your eye colour?

...Brown? Maybe black. I don't know. Is it important?

7. Scary movies or happy endings?

Seeing as how my life could be classified as a scary movie sometimes, I prefer happy endings.

8. Any special interests?

Mm. Define special. I used to be a PI and buried myself in the work so hard I barely had time for anything else. My interests back then were things like body language, minor facial expressions, and anything else that furthered my line of work. I did like to hunt.

But now that I'm...here...I've picked up the guitar again and have been thinking about going electric. Otherwise I'm...still trying to figure it out.

9. Where were you born?

In a forest. Where were you born?

10. What are your hobbies?

I suppose thinking of the consequences of my daughter's unleashed magic doesn't count.

I've been working a lot of magical theory lately and carving wood pieces. Thought about pursuing dancing or playing guitar again, like I said. But like I also said, I'm still...working on it.

11. Do you have any pets?

Does a magically-created mud-moss-vine equine-ish creature count?

If not, then no. Although I did have an actual horse back in the 1800s. He was a sweetheart.

...what's with the lo- Oh. The collar. That's uh...that's not for a pet. Next question.

12. What sports do you play / have played?

I used to run. A lot.

...

But I don't think that's what you meant.

13. How tall are you?

Tall as I want to be.

14. Favourite subject in school?

I...Uh...I didn't exactly have...'school'. Grew up in a forest around the mid...or maybe late...1500s and spend most of my time with my mother. Who was a sprite. Sprite children are born knowing what they need to know, so sprites don't exactly understand this idea of 'school'. My father taught me what I'd need to know if I was to pass as human, but most of the things I remember were magically-oriented.

...I suppose I enjoyed reading and writing. Not that it helped much after I left. He taught me what he knew, which didn't include English, Spanish, or any of the other places I wound up in. Although I did have music lessons once I got to Spain and those were good days.

15. Dream Job

I don't actually know. I've had a lot of things I've done over the years. Mostly to survive. A few of them were jobs. Never really stopped to dream. Never really risked it, if I'm honest. Well, no. When I was younger I didn't dream of jobs. I didn't know what a job was. By the time I was old enough to have learned the concept, I was beyond the point of dreaming for anything beyond the next sunrise. Then I believed dreams were a poison only the young and foolish were dumb enough to drink.

Now, though...

If I had a dream it would be being allowed to be a mother, girlfriend, and friend in peace and to see those I love happy and safe.

Pretty sure that's not a job. Feels like a job to help keep us safe, though.

------

No pressure tags!

@sleepyowlwrites/@knmartinshouldbewriting/@concealeddarkness13/@pens-swords-stuff/@pen-of-roses/@magic-is-something-we-create/@mjjune/@vacantgodling/@ryns-ramblings/and open tag for the rest!

[teenageread]

Review: The Love Hypothesis

Synopsis:

As a third-year Ph.D. candidate, Olive Smith doesn't believe in lasting romantic relationships--but her best friend does, and that's what got her into this situation. Convincing Anh that Olive is dating and well on her way to a happily ever after was always going to take more than hand-wavy Jedi mind tricks: Scientists require proof. So, like any self-respecting biologist, Olive panics and kisses the first man she sees.

That man is none other than Adam Carlsen, a young hotshot professor--and well-known ass. Which is why Olive is positively floored when Stanford's reigning lab tyrant agrees to keep her charade a secret and be her fake boyfriend. But when a big science conference goes haywire, putting Olive's career on the Bunsen burner, Adam surprises her again with his unyielding support and even more unyielding... six-pack abs.

Suddenly their little experiment feels dangerously close to combustion. And Olive discovers that the only thing more complicated than a hypothesis on love is putting her own heart under the microscope.

Plot:

Olive does something that was completely out of character: she kissed a stranger. But for a good reason! Olive is a third-year Ph.D. candidate, and although she knows biology and cancer research, she is not so good at a social life. The fact that she had a boyfriend at some point in her life was startling, so it was not a big deal when they broke up. The big deal is that Anh, one of Olive’s two friends, has a crush on that ex-boyfriend and will not go out with him in solidarity with Olive. Therefore, to show Anh that she is over her ex, she lies and says she was on a date when in reality she was just at the lab. Seeing Anh, Olive panics and kisses the first person she sees, which is Dr. Adam Carlsen, a professor at the university. Mortified, Olive tried to explain her situation to the hardest professor at school, and when Dr. Carlsen threatened to report Olive, he also decided to give her a chance to date. Well, not really dating. Fake dating actually. Pretending to fake date Adam, Olive does it to show Anh that she’s over her ex, and Adam does it to show the university that he is sticking around and that they can un-freeze his funding. Where everyone is shocked that quiet Olive could land gorgeous but always grumpy Adam, their fake date Wednesday begins to turn more real when Olive discovers feelings she never thought she was capable of, and Adam begins to reveal his feelings that he might have had all along.

vThoughts: Ali Hazelwood wows readers with this slow-burn science-centered love story between Ph.D. student Olive, and Dr. Carlsen, all taking place within the Stanford University biology program. Told from the point of view of Olive, you see the first person point of view of her navigating this fake relationship she got in with Adam, all while trying to keep her friendships real, her future secure, and her lab mice alive. As the story is told from Olive’s perspective, Hazelwood's writing is catchy, fast-paced, and often extremely awkward. You want to bang your head as Olive, despite being extremely intelligent, does dumb moves with Adam, and once she starts to catch feelings, you moan as she runs away despite Adam being everything she always wanted. Olive, you dummy! However, Hazelwood keeps the story romantic along with the comedy, as this slow burn is worth it as Hazelwood leads readers to some steamy scenes and a final ending that will make you swoop in love. Alongside Adam and Olive, we get their friends, and where Adam’s friends are not as defined as Olive’s, that is not a bad thing as Hazelwood does not do their best with Anh and Malcolm. Malcolm has a very two-dimensional story arc, and where he does know Olive and Adam are fake datings, he does not use that information to any sort of advantage or move the plot. In fact, the only noticeable thing about Malcolm knowing is Anh not knowing. Now, I am sure Hazelwood did not mean to do this, but they wrote Anh as a horrible friend. She is pushy, forcing Olive and Adam into embarrassing situations, and often disregards Olive's discomfort. Like, even if your friend is in a new relationship, you do not force them into these situations like Anh does to Olive. Where Hazelwood was trying to write Anh as the caring friend, she just seemed necessarily cruel to Olive at points, who was struggling to understand her feelings for Adam. But hey, at least Anh moved the plotline, unlike Malcolm. Overall, this is a rom-com, slow-burn, fake dating novel through and through as Hazelwood balances out the awkward parts with the sweetness as Olive, a girl who thought she would be forever alone, the sunshine and extra-whipped cream at Starbucks, falls in love with the brooding, intelligent, grumpy pants of Adam, who despite seemingly hating the world has fallen madly in love for her.

Read more reviews: Goodreads

Buy the book: Amazon

[cupofteaguk]

on the road (to you)

summary: as a young adult, one of the strangest revelations is the discovery that peers of yours from past fragile college years are getting married. so imagine your shock and excitement upon receiving a wedding invitation. there are, however, two problems: (1) you are a poor early-20s recently employed adult just beginning to adjust to your 401k plan, and (2) the only available ride to the wedding comes in the form of Jeon Jungkook—friend of a friend, attendee to that aforementioned wedding, and your old college crush. 

pairing: jungkook x fem!reader

genre: roadtrip au, strangers to lovers au | fluff/angst 

warnings: recreational alcoholic consumption, definitely not an accurate representation of how a road trip might actually be, mentions of anxiety + insecurities, very minor book reference to: The Night Circus, equally minor movie references to: Mission Impossible and The Princess Bride because I have a problem, light makeout sessions, talks of DTR (define the relationship), some angst but this is me so there’s a happy ending. 

word count: 27k 

a/n: a birthday present for the one and only Jeon Jungkook, whom I love and respect so much and only wish the bestest of days for. Partly inspired by Taylor Swift’s song “invisible string” +  a love letter of sorts to my own old high school crush for whom my memory of him helped build Jungkook’s character. This also turned out way longer than I ever wanted it to be lol oops! 

update: i was actually able to do a writer’s audio tag on this fic!!! check it out if you want to hear about the behind the scenes process that went into writing this fic <3 

.

When you land a job in the months following your college graduation, you feel as if you are on top of the world. How could you not? After all, the norm that follows post-college is one of disappointment and constant hunts online to find job openings for any position that could suit your background and previous work experiences. It’s a fear that plagues lots of your friends, both those in college and out. It’s the same paranoia you had in the months leading up to graduation and the few months after graduation—in which your days were measured by the boxes you packed to move out of your tiny college apartment and into an equally tiny new apartment you currently share with an old roommate of yours, as well as the days you spent hunched over your computer and scrolling through job postings. 

You had gone through more than a handful of cover letters, resume submissions, and in person interviews before finally landing the job you currently have and have been working under for a month now. 

Throughout the course of the recent month, you’ve continued to secure certain moments that solidify the confidence that you’re finally becoming an adult. Sure, a barely functioning adult who mostly still uses the microwave to heat up your frozen Mac and Cheese—but an adult nonetheless. From learning how to pay your bills online, to realizing that grocery shopping was something you needed to make a conscious effort to do, along with going to and from your nine to five job with your coffee order in hand. 

All of those things have helped you feel like you were, perhaps, finally getting your life together. 

And then you receive the invitation in the mailbox. 

It happens when you unlock your box on a bright March morning, taking out the usual round of bills and fashion magazines until your fingers lock around an envelope bigger than the normal letter size. It’s much sturdier too. 

You don’t know what to think of the letter, until you bring the damn thing back into your apartment and rip the opening. The mere sight of the content inside makes you feel like the hand of life has just taken your figurine and moved you back a good twenty squares. 

The post in your hand reads: 

WITH GREAT JOY, IRENE AND SEOKJIN REQUEST THE HONOR OF YOUR PRESENCE FOR THEIR WEDDING CELEBRATION ON THE DAY OF MAY 25TH. COCKTAILS, DINNER, AND DANCING TO FOLLOW. 

There’s a date at the bottom of the invitation. As you line the date up with your calendar, you realize that you have a week to RSVP to the event. 

You toss the envelope onto the counter in the kitchen just to glare at the cardstock, maybe to convince yourself this is a dream or at least convince yourself that it’s normal for your friend from college to be getting married even when you have yet to land a successful relationship of your own. 

You aren’t as close with Irene as you used to be, but the memory of your friendship is still at the forefront of your mind. The pair of you met during your final year of university, when you were assigned to work together for one of your many senior projects and immediately clicked. The months you spent in her apartment and vice versa pulling out all-nighters in desperate attempts to finish your project definitely earns you an invitation. At the very least, you are happy to see that Irene: bright and smart and funny, is getting married. 

Not only that, but getting married to Seokjin. He’s a year older than you and Irene, but those two met when he was still enrolled and have been inseparable ever since. You don’t know relationships that well, but you know them enough to recognize that Seokjin and Irene were what everyone called the ‘endgame’. In truth, it was only a matter of time before you were to receive one of these from them. 

But did she really have to one-up you like this? Not that it’s a competition. However, it does leave a funny feeling to see someone the same age as you display a much more put together handle on life. You groan at the thought.

“What’s got your panties in a twist?” Karly asks. 

You turn to your roommate. She’s seated at the kitchen table, books out and everywhere as she looks over at you. Karly: fellow alumni, graduated from her undergrad program early to go straight into pursuing her master’s degree. She’s a busy bee. You wave the envelope. “Irene is getting married.” 

Her eyes widen. “Ah shit, no way?” She takes the paper that you offer to her and looks over the invitation. “Damn, I knew it was only a matter of time before we started getting this stuff, but to actually see it happening…” 

You groan. “I know right!” You take the cardstock back from your friend. “It’s only been six months since we graduated, how could she be getting married already?” 

“Well, Irene did have a job lined up for her right after graduation,” Karly points out thoughtfully. She sees the look of bewilderment you give her. “What? It was on her Instagram.” 

You pout. “Of course Irene would have a job lined up like that.” You run a hand through your hair. “I mean, that’s good for her. Really good, actually…” 

Karly jerks her chin towards the envelope still in your hand. “So, are you planning to go?” 

“I don’t know, do you have plans that day?” You wave the paper. “I’m allowed a plus one.” 

Your roommate cracks a smile. “Are you asking me out? A little forward of you, we’ve been friends for so long…” 

You whine, shaking the paper and little more frantically. “Karly, this is important! I don’t want to go alone, I won’t know anyone!” 

She laughs. “Okay, okay, I’m sorry. What was the date again?” 

You provide the date to her. You approach Karly’s place at the kitchen table and watch as she opens the calendar on her laptop. Immediately, you are overwhelmed by all the deadlines she’s got under practicality every date on the screen. Yet, a “wow” is the only thing you can say at the sight. 

Karly smiles, sparing you a glance over her shoulder. “One of the joys of being a grad student slash T.A. slash research assistant.” She scrolls down into May, and narrows her eyes upon May 25th. Underneath the date is an event—color coated to bright orange and typed out in all caps. CONFERENCE WITH PROFESSOR WONG. “Oh crap, I have a conference that day.” 

“No…” You whine some more, trailing off as you grab Karly by the shoulders and begin shaking. “Karly! You’ve left me out for the bears! What am I supposed to do?” 

Karly laughs as she lets herself be manhandled in this way. “I don’t know! Go and deepen your social life or something.” 

You stop shaking her and glare instead. “Is that a joke?” 

“What do you expect me to say?” She retorts, appalled by your answer. “Then don’t go.” 

You whine again. “But this is Irene, and I’ll feel bad for not going and congratulating her!” 

“Then go!” 

“But I don’t have a plus one!” 

Karly places her hands at her temples. “Oh my god, this is like the circle of stupidity with you. Then find a plus one! Or just don’t go!” She whirls around to face you. “I will help you find a dress if you decide to go. I will also sit with you on the couch and eat popcorn with you if you decide not to go.” 

You continue to pout, knowing that you deserve that gentle attempt at a lecture but still not liking the reason why you needed such a talking to. 

“Fine,” You eventually decide to say, sliding into the seat next to Karly and leaning forward to plant your entire upper body on the table. 

Karly laughs at your defeated posture. “Well, you have the rest of the week to make your decision.” 

She has a point. That doesn’t mean you have to like it. 

.

For the rest of the week the decision of whether or not you should attend the wedding becomes a weight in your mind. You spend the next few days pondering it, thinking over the pros and the cons. 

As overdramatic as it is, you think about it during work, when you’re partaking in your home workout routines, and even when you’re about to fall asleep. You do want to go, you really do. It’ll be the first time you attend a wedding that didn’t involve a relative, which feels like a big deal in your adult agenda mindset. And Irene is someone you wouldn’t mind spending an evening with to catch up. 

However, you wouldn’t get to spend the evening with Irene—after all, a wedding implies that she would likely be mingling with all of her guests and you would just be another attendee forced to find other means of entertainment. That’s where the plus one comes in handy. Except you don’t have a plus one. A slight problem. 

You sigh. Work is a little slow today, as you are also experiencing the afternoon slump in which your mind drifts away more often than usual. You find yourself with a small laundry list of tasks (such as emailing companies, working on drafts for releases, and trying to set up different appointments) but without the motivation to do those things right away. Because of that, your afternoon slump takes the form of opening airline services to find information and prices about flying to Irene’s wedding. It’s in her hometown, about a five hour flight time from here to there. 

You click on the various boxes that require information, finally allowing a search. As the search goes through, your eyes take in all the prices—both the amount to get there and to get back—and your lips part slightly at the totaling numbers. 

“Five hundred dollars?” You mutter to yourself. You’re not sure how this would work with budgeting, but you’re still trying to figure out how to balance the cost of AC, the internet, and how to eat appropriate meals at least once a day. You don’t have five hundred dollars to spend on an airplane ticket. A slightly bigger problem. 

You sigh again, resting your elbow on the desk and your chin in the palm as your eyes continue to scroll through the website. 

Behind you, fingers curl around the top of your cubicle. There is a silence between the two of you: him, merely observing, and you, completely oblivious, until he clears his throat. 

You jump, having not expected to be interrupted like this. A squeak leaves the back of your throat as you whirl around to see who is visiting you. “Jimin!” You exclaim, taking in the boy now perched along the wall of your cubicle. This is before you narrow your eyes. “Asshole, you scared me!” 

If you just started working here and learned that you’d be cursing out Park Jimin for startling you, that past version of yourself might have turned red, shocked, and nervous at the thought. A month ago, Jimin was that coworker—as friendly as friendly people come by. With his pretty eyes, perfectly soft pink lips, and freshly dyed brown hair, you had been immediately taken by his charm and helpful nature. 

Then the month went by, and you realized there were no romantic intentions on either end. Jimin then became your first friend in your new job. Albeit, he’s a nosy friend who enjoys asking questions and dragging you out to nearby bars and coming over occasionally with take-out, but a friend nonetheless. 

“Sorry!” Jimin says back, then he glares at you. “What are you doing over here anyways?” 

You shake your head. “What do you mean?” 

“What do you mean what do I mean? You’ve been sighing all afternoon.” Jimin pulls out a slip of paper from behind his back. “Fifty times in the last hour, I swear to god.” 

You straighten out of your seat to get a better look at the paper, unamused to find fifty tally marks across the surface. “You’re lying, there’s no way that I sighed fifty times in an hour.” 

“Of course you wouldn’t know, you’re the one doing all the sighing!” Jimin retorts, lowering his hand with the paper. “Is something up with you? Did something happen?” His eyes flicker to the monitor screen behind you and he frowns. “What the fuck? Are you moving away already?” 

You blink. “What?” 

He jerks his chin towards the computer. “You’re looking at flight prices.” 

“Huh?” You turn around, having completely forgotten about your previous predicament in light of discovering that Jimin counts your sighs. “Oh! No…” 

Jimin raises an eyebrow. “No, you’re not looking at flight prices?” 

You slide back into your chair, a silent invitation for Jimin to step further into your cubicle. You sigh again, and he holds the paper back up. Taking a pencil out of his pocket, he makes another mark. You look over at him upon hearing the pencil scratch and scowl. “Give me that!” You grab the paper from his hand. “I’m dealing with a crisis right now, don’t count my sighs!”

“Alright! Alright!” Jimin slides behind you and leans forward to get a better look at your computer screen. “So where are you moving to this time?” 

You press your lips together. “I’m not moving away. A friend of mine from college is getting married. I’m just trying to see how expensive it would be to fly over there.” 

He whistles at the five hundred dollar price in your cart. “That’s pretty expensive.” 

“I know!” You groan, throwing yourself further back into your chair. “I wouldn’t mind going, but I don’t have a plus one. And as you can see, flying there would be a challenge on my wallet.” 

Jimin hums at that. “Well, regarding your plus one problem, I wouldn’t mind going with you.” 

You turn to look at him. “Really? You’d go across the country and endure an entire evening with your coworker and her old college classmates?” 

He shrugs. “If you’re desperate, I’ll keep my offer around.” He actually pouts this time. “Are you implying that you see me more as a coworker than a friend? After all the times we’ve hung out outside of work!” 

Your eyes widen slightly, having not thought of that. “No, no, Jimin, I mean—yes, I do see you as a friend now but we met as coworkers so I just think of you as a coworker first—!” You’re rambling. 

Jimin interrupts by patting your shoulder, the corner of his lips quirked up into a smile. “I’m just messing with you.” 

You shake your head again. “Asshole,” You grumble, returning your attention back to your computer. 

Jimin is still mid-laughter behind you. “Anyways, yeah, like I said. If you’re desperate to go, I wouldn’t mind going with you. But deciding how to get there is a different question entirely.” 

You turn to glare at your friend for a moment. “I’ll let you know.” 

He nods, before his lips part and he’s snapping his fingers. “Oh yeah! I wanted to ask you something.” 

He backs up, allowing you enough space to turn around fully and face him. “Okay, what’s up?” 

Jimin grins, lifting his leg up to nudge your chair slightly. “I’m going out tonight—you should come with.” 

You don’t even give this a second thought. Your lips turn into a downwards curl as you shake your head. “Nope.” 

Jimin looks appalled. “Why not? Didn’t you have fun the last time we went out?” 

“If ‘fun’ to you is trying to drag your drunk ass home and staying the night to make sure you wouldn’t choke on your vomit…” You grumble, trying not to shudder at the memory. It has only been a few days since that ‘fun’ time. 

“I told you that sometimes I overestimate my abilities, and I already apologized for that,” Jimin points out, although he does have the decency to look guilty for that mess. He perks up again. “But this’ll be different, I promise. I’m meeting up with some friends and we’re just gonna catch up. It’s at one of the quieter bars uptown: no loud DJ, no bright lights, no bottomless rum and coke. Promise. It’ll just be a lot of socializing.” He watches you hesitantly. Socializing has never been your strong suit. “And finger food.” 

The mention of food does make you look up towards him—your first sign of interest towards something. However, another thought weighs you down. “Are you sure you even want me to go?” You ask after a moment. “I mean, this is a catch up with friends. Wouldn’t I be intruding?” 

“Not at all!” Jimin brushes off, waving away your concern with his hand. “I told you, it’s a socializing thing. Besides, my friends are always bringing someone along. They were asking me when I’d have a friend tag along, so I thought you’d be a good selection.” He notices you still frowning. “C’mon! It’ll be fun. When I’m not vomiting over your shoes, I’m good company. And I promise I won’t be vomiting this time.” 

You stare at Jimin for a moment longer, contemplating his words. This is very true. Jimin is an ideal friend to have during social gatherings—he’s good at keeping a conversation going so you don’t have to shoulder the weight alone, he’s good at reading when you’re in a good mood and when you’re ready to go home, and he’s excellent at keeping unwanted attention away. You know this. Jimin knows that you know this. 

It takes one curl of your lips for Jimin to grin, knowing that he has convinced you. “Okay!” He says, finalizing the decision without having to hear the actual answer from you. He pats your knee. “We’ll take the subway after work, it’s just a few stops down.” 

If your mind conjures up any second thoughts, Jimin leaves before you are able to express them. 

.

True to Jimin’s word, the pair of you step into a subway heading westbound as soon as you’re finished with work. It’s much later in the day now, the afternoon sun has changed into a night sky with a chill spring breeze to match. The carts are filled with the evening crowd of adults, all done with another day of work and finding enjoyment for the rest of today by returning home or seeing friends. It’s a rarity that you would fall under that latter category, but the thought makes you excited nonetheless. 

“Alright, so you wanna tell me a little bit about these friends that I’m seeing tonight?” You ask, gripping the handlebar above you but leaning towards Jimin so he can hear what you’re saying over the noise of the subway speeding down the tracks. 

Jimin grins. “They’re just some friends I grew up with. We like to get together once a month to catch up and hang out, since everyone is so busy with their own lives.” 

You smile back. “That’s actually really sweet of you guys, to plan hangouts once a month.” 

He lightly flicks your forehead. “Hey, are you saying I’m normally not very sweet?” 

“Well, not right now!” You protest, hand over your forehead. “That hurt.” 

“You’re being a baby!” Jimin retorts back. 

The pair of you continue to bicker like this until your stop is announced over the intercom. Jimin halts the further insults being thrown at each other as he gestures towards the approaching station, as seen through the window of the subway. 

“This is our stop,” Jimin says to you, allowing you to step out onto the platform first. He joins behind you right after, leading the way as the subway’s three chimes signal the closing of the doors. There’s a breeze that follows, running through your hair and clothes as the subway zooms away to its next stop. The station itself is crowded, filled with groups of friends and individuals carrying on with the rest of their evening, overall looking so lively and you can feel yourself feeding off their energy. 

With a gesture pointing up the stairs that’ll take the pair of you to ground level, Jimin leads the way. You make your way through people, following Jimin’s guide until you’re both exiting the station and entering the world of your new stop. It’s another area of the city you work in, so the change in scenery isn’t too dramatic—but it’s a place more catered towards restaurants, shopping areas, and hang-out sections. The bright neon signs protrude out from the building, flashing the various products or services the specific building offered: from manicure care to corner ramen shops. 

“C’mon, let’s hurry!” Jimin calls back to you, picking his pace up slightly. He’s not running, but his long legs make it harder for you to keep up. “Everyone is already there.” 

The pair of you continue to pace down the sidewalk, past the crowds of people waiting to eat, people lingering outside of clothing stores. Finally, Jimin slows down near a restaurant. He looks over his shoulder to make sure you’re still behind him, before entering the establishment. He mentions something about knowing where their seats are, before continuing deeper into the restaurant. 

As you look around, the place does look like a restaurant slash bar—not as crazy as some of the bars Jimin takes you with the intention of actually getting drunk, but there’s still a bar here and there’s still alcohol being shared heavily. It’s the same demographic of early 20s, young adults with friends, but there are actual tables and chairs and booths set up like a restaurant. So you suppose Jimin hadn’t been lying to you about this. 

“There they are!” Jimin says to you, as you look up and follow Jimin’s finger to the table in the far corner that is completely filled with the exception of two seats. You vaguely make out the back of some heads, most belonging to boys, before your eyes land on one of the boys facing you and Jimin. He’s sitting at the far end of the table, currently laughing brightly at something one of the boys at the table has said. For all intents and purposes, the boy is cute. Extremely cute. When he laughs, his eyes and nose crinkle and his lips spread into a wild smile—and brings out the dimple on his cheek. He looks like the embodiment of all your ideal types mashed into a singular being. 

All of those things. Yet, that is not the reason why you are staring. None of those things come close to why you stop dead in your tracks, why your heart drops in your chest, why your eyes widen. Even with the shitty lighting in this restaurant, you are one hundred percent positive. “Jimin!” You manage to choke out, having enough well power to grab onto his hand seconds before he is able to make himself and yourself known to his friends. 

He whirls around, wide-eyed and curious and worried. “What? Is everything okay?” 

You shake your head. The room feels too small. “I think there’s something I should tell you—!” 

“Hey, is that Jimin? Jimin!” Your voice is very easily drowned out by the sound of another, much louder voice that seems to boom through the restaurant. 

Jimin turns back around in time to face one of the boys from the table who has gotten out of his seat. You are able to see him from over Jimin’s shoulder—a tall boy with messy unkempt hair and a boxy smile. Jimin greets him with a “Taehyung!” before the boys embrace. “Taehyungie,” Jimin continues afterwards, turning around so both are able to face you. “This is Y/N, she’s a coworker of mine.” 

Taehyung grins, a friendly gesture that makes you relax. But only slightly. “Y/N! It’s nice to meet you, I’ve heard a bit about you from Jimin. All good things, I promise.” 

“W-Well, that’s good to hear,” You manage shakily, eyes nervously darting to the boy at the end of the table, who has stopped his conversation and is now looking at you and Jimin. 

“Let me introduce you,” Jimin says, breaking your concentration as he rests a hand on your shoulder. He points right at the boy at the end of the table, who is still staring at you. His eyebrows are furrowed together. You want to bury yourself alive. “That one over there is—!” 

A lightbulb seems to go off in the boy’s head. His face breaks out into a smile as he points at you. “Hey, Y/N!” 

Jimin looks taken aback at the fact you are being recognized by someone at the table. His hand lowers as he looks over at you. 

You, however, cannot focus on Jimin. You can only focus on the boy at the end of the table, the boy currently smiling over at you with all the light in his eyes, the boy who makes the memories flash through your mind. From that, the best you can manage is a tiny smile. “Jungkook!” 

Jungkook. Jeon Jungkook. Where do you even begin with him? 

You met Jungkook during your second year of university. He had been an arts major (you were not) and yet, your paths crossed multiple times throughout the quarter as a result of sharing many general education classes together. You even were forced to pair up on a project for one of those aforementioned G.E. classes. Neither of you ran in the same social circle, but that didn’t change how sweet, funny, charming, endearing, easy-going, friendly, smart, and nice Jungkook was. It was very easy for him to make friends, very easy for him to go out of his way to say hi to you in the library or in class or in the cafeteria, and very easy for him to strike up a basic conversation with you. 

Because of that, it was very easy for you to fall for him—to develop a deep-rooted crush that went on for the rest of your university experience. You would use the term ‘friends’ very loosely when describing what your relationship with Jungkook had been. You had never hung out with him outside the context of school, never went out to eat with him, and never saw him again after graduation. Until now. 

Actually, ‘acquaintances’ would probably be a much more fitting term. 

“Hey, I haven’t seen you since graduation!” Jungkook is saying as he stands up from his chair and approaches you. As if on autopilot, you return the one armed hug he gives you. His smile, while still pleasant, holds a surprising tinge of shyness to it. 

“Woah, hold on a second,” Jimin interrupts, immediately pointing between Jungkook and you. “You guys know each other?” 

“Y/N and I went to university together!” Jungkook provides. 

Jimin looks like his eyes are about to fall out of his sockets. 

“We’ve known each other since second year,” Jungkook continues. He looks over at you. “I didn’t know you know Jimin.” 

“Uh…” You forget how to speak. You’re too busy looking at Jungkook as if you haven’t seen him for years. In a way, it feels like that. Seeing people from college outside of college after a graduation ceremony is like meeting them again for the first time—most of them develop a more independent look. Some look like their life is seconds from falling apart. Some look much happier without the institutional pressure to secure classes and grades and internships. Sadly for you, Jungkook falls under the latter category. Did he always have that twinkle of starlight in his eyes? 

“Y/N and I work together,” Jimin provides, seeming to realize that you weren’t going to answer Jungkook’s question. “She started working about a month ago.” 

“Oh, that’s cool,” Jungkook replies, still looking at you. It is then he seems to notice that the three of you are standing in the middle of the restaurant. Although you are not distracting any patrons, the workers probably don’t appreciate it. “How about we sit down? We’ll be able to catch up more!” 

Jimin seems to regain control of the situation quicker than you do, because he nods at Jungkook. “Let me introduce her to everyone, then we’ll join you.” You look over to where Jungkook had been sitting and immediately notice the previously empty two chairs right across from him—like fate, or something terrible like that. 

So you watch as Jungkook makes his way back to his seat, and Jimin starts to guide you around the table. He only drops a name. Surprisingly, he doesn’t linger, he merely takes you to the next person. It only takes you a second to figure out why. 

“You didn’t tell me you know Jungkook,” Jimin hisses in between the time it takes to travel in between people. 

“I didn’t know you knew Jungkook!” You hiss back. You smile and nod politely at the person Jimin introduces as Yoongi. “Seriously, you never mentioned him once!” 

Jimin only keeps his frustration for a moment before he’s introducing you to someone named Hoseok, a boy with a bright smile, the one who was making Jungkook laugh earlier. “Okay, fine,” He relents, the pair of you finally move to take your seats. “But what was that earlier?” 

“What was what?” 

“You were just staring at him! What, did you have a huge crush on him or something—?” Jimin accuses, but he stops. Just as the pair of you are about to sit down, Jimin parts his lips in realization. “Oh.” Then, he sends you an absolutely wicked grin. “Oh, okay.” 

Your eyes widen at him, murder in your eyes. “Jimin!” 

“So, Y/N,” Jungkook’s voice cuts through your little biting banter with Jimin. 

You whirl around to face Jungkook, eyes completely devoid of murder and voice several pitches higher. “Hi, Jungkook!” 

He smiles, such a wonderful little thing that makes your heart flutter in your chest. “Hi.” 

Jimin ducks his head to hide the fact that he wants nothing more than to burst into fits of laughter. 

“So how have you been?” Jungkook starts up. “I haven’t seen you since graduation. Since you landed a job, you seem to be doing well.” 

“I am!” You manage, only continuing to try and keep a handle on your heart and managing well enough this time. “There were a few months of just scrolling through job postings and writing cover letter after cover letter though.” 

Jungkook laughs, another beautiful gesture that makes you mirror his smile. “I definitely feel that.” 

“Well, what about you? What have you been up to?” You ask. “I think I saw on your Instagram and you were traveling around for a little?” 

His eyes light up at that. “Oh yeah! I don’t know if you remember Kim Mingyu from school?” You do. “Well, he and a friend of his got into some freelancing and had to do some traveling around to work on some filming. He asked me to come along because I actually have some photography experience. So that was a thing I did for a few months.” 

You nod, smiling. “No way! That’s so cool.” 

You do relax after a few conversational exchanges with Jungkook. He’s just as relaxed and mellow, yet friendly and polite as ever, and it’s easy to make conversation with him as it always has been. Eventually, you join in on the larger conversations with the whole table—touching on topics from your university experiences to tales from your new job. A lot of your role, however, falls to listening. Jimin’s friends are rowdy, funny, and out-going. They invite you in like you have been in this group for years—and are able to provide context on older memories they are revisiting. 

Most of your evening, however, is engaging in conversation with Jungkook. Occasionally, Jimin will join in, but he does spend most of his time laughing along to something his other friends are saying. Since you and Jungkook have always been friendly with each other, long conversations aren’t out of the ordinary. You just never considered how well you and Jungkook got along, how easy it would be to transition from topic to topic. 

“I am really glad that Jimin invited you along,” Jungkook explains brightly after the pair of you are done laughing following Jungkook’s tale of another fuck-ups with Kim Mingyu. “Makes you realize how small the world is.” 

“Oh, you should have seen her moping around earlier today,” Jimin interjects, choosing now of all times to insert himself back into your conversation with Jungkook. “She was sighing all afternoon—so maybe we should thank her misery that I decided to invite her along tonight.” 

Jungkook turns to you, a sympathetic look across his face. “Did you have a bad day today?” 

You try for a laugh, waving away Jimin’s words. “Jimin’s just overreacting. Actually, I found out a friend of mine from college is getting married, so I was trying to figure out my plan…” You start, trailing off as you look at Jungkook. “Wait, you didn’t know Irene, did you?” 

“I did.” His eyes widen as his lips part in realization. “Oh my god, you were invited to Irene’s wedding too?” 

“I was!” You exclaim, unsure whether you should be excited or even more nervous at the prospect of potentially seeing Jungkook at the wedding event. “Holy shit, this makes it an even smaller world. How did you know Irene?” 

Jungkook is still mid-giggle at the pure coincidence of everything. “We both knew Mingyu! This is so crazy. Are you planning to go?” 

You shrug. Jimin chooses to interject once more. “That’s what Y/N over here was sighing all afternoon over.” 

You whine as you look at Jimin. “No need to sell me out! Listen, Jungkook.” You turn back to the boy opposite of you, who is still gazing at you. “I’m sure you understand my current predicament.” 

“Sure.” 

“You know how expensive flights can be.” 

“Of course.” 

You fold your arms over each other and rest them on the table. “So, are you planning to go to the wedding?” 

He nods. “Most likely, yeah. I actually knew that the wedding was going to be happening soon, since Mingyu told me about it as soon as Irene got the ring. I ran into the flight problem pretty quickly too, so I decided to just drive to the event.” 

Jimin whistles. “Drive across the country, huh, JK? That must be a four day trip, or something.” 

“It was coming out to be,” Jungkook acknowledges with a nod. “But it’s okay.” He’s grinning, looking excited at the prospect. “I’ve never done a cross country drive before, so it was actually kind of exciting to plan the route. There are a few places I want to stop by and visit. I’m sure it’ll be fun.” Then, Jungkook turns back to you. “If you decide that flying would be too expensive, then you’re more than welcome to come along. It’ll be nice to have some company and not spend four days by myself.” 

Entirely on instinct, you start to laugh. You think he’s joking—how could you not? This is probably one of the longest conversations you’ve ever had with Jungkook. Like you’ve mentioned before, you wouldn’t consider him a friend. Why would he seriously try to invite you on a road trip?  “Yeah, I’m not too sure—I’ve never done a cross country trip before…” 

The conversation shifts pretty quickly as soon as you reply back to Jungkook. Hoseok asks you a question that drags your attention away, simultaneously allowing you to forget about Jungkook’s request. 

The end of the dinner happens soon after, when the bill has been paid and you suspect the long line of people outside waiting for a table are waiting for your party to be done. So venmo exchanges and money debts go around until each member of the table starts standing up one by one to make their move to exit the restaurant. 

You and Jimin are one of the first to leave. Goodbyes are exchanged along with the polite ‘it was nice to meet you’ phrase thrown around. Jungkook is mid-conversation with Yoongi, but he still gives you a quick hug of parting before you and Jimin exit the restaurant. 

The pair of you only make it out a few steps before there is a familiar voice calling your name. “Hey, Y/N! Y/N, wait up!” You stop and turn around, surprised to see Jungkook dashing out of the restaurant. He rests himself for a moment before he’s straightening back up to look at you. 

You try for a smile. “Hey Jungkook, what’s up?” 

He takes in a few more deep breaths to calm himself—either from the dashing he just did or to steel himself for the next question, you don’t know. “It’s about me inviting you to drive up to Irene’s wedding—I just thought I’d let you know it was a serious invitation. Having the company would be nice, and you wouldn’t be a burden to me, seriously. Besides, it’ll be fun to spend some time together.” 

“O-Oh,” You stammer, wringing your hands together. “I’m not too sure… I still have to think about it.” 

“Of course, of course,” Jungkook dismisses good naturedly. “Just thought I’d let you know, so you know that you do have options.” 

Although the offer makes you nervous, you cannot dismiss Jungkook’s thoughtfulness. You give him a more relaxed smile. “I really appreciate that Jungkook, thank you.” 

He smiles at your smile. “No problem! Actually…” He digs around for the wallet in his pocket and produces a little card. “Here’s my business card—my cell phone number is on here so just text or call if you decide to join me. Or,” He presses his lips into a more bashful smile. “You can just text me whenever for whatever reason. I just thought I’d let you know that it was good to see you again.” 

You take the card slowly, unable to look away from Jungkook’s face. He looks so genuine and shy that it doesn’t help your own racing heart. “It was good to see you too, Jungkook…” You return, albeit a little breathlessly. 

He smiles again, dimples pressing in his cheek (and your heart). He turns to Jimin “Oh yeah, nice seeing you too Park.” 

“Hey.” Jimin hits him on the shoulder. “I’m your hyung, you should show me more respect!” 

“My bad, my bad.” Jungkook doesn’t apologize though. His gaze flickers to yours one more time, gaze looking strangely hopeful. “I’ll see you guys around.” He walks backwards a few paces before turning around and returning to the restaurant. Maybe to see his other friends. 

Either way, it doesn’t matter. You are still screaming internally regardless—as shown through your red cheeks, widened eyes, and singing heart. Jimin will certainly never let you live this moment down. 

. 

Now, you are screaming externally. You don’t even give a thought or an explanation. You simply walk into your apartment, nosedive for the couch, and start yelling into one of the throw pillows. 

There’s a rapid movement of footsteps coming from down the hallway almost immediately, one that grows gradually louder until the owner of the steps starts speaking. “Who the fuck is out there? I’ve played softball my entire life and therefore will not hesitate to drive this bat so far up your ass—oh, Y/N.” The voice lowers significantly, as does the threat level it emits into the air. “It’s just you.” 

You lift your face from the throw pillow, and immediately brush away at the hair that falls in your face. “What the fuck!” You croak, pushing yourself into a sitting position and pointing at the bat in Karly’s hands. “What are you doing threatening me with a bat? You’ve never played a game of softball in your life!” 

“Oh, this isn’t mine. It’s Soonyoung’s.” Soonyoung is Karly’s boyfriend from high school, who used to play baseball on the high school team. How Karly has her boyfriend’s baseball bat is a mystery, but it’s something you think you are better off not asking about. She places the bat down on the carpet next to the coffee table. “But I should be asking you the questions, you bitch! You scared the shit out of me!” 

You sigh, throwing your head to rest on the back of the couch. “Sorry, sorry. Had a crazy day.” 

Karly ponders this as she moves to take a seat next to you. “You seemed fine when you texted me about you getting drinks with Jimin. Did something happen during the dinner?” 

You straighten up again and grip Karly by the arm. “Okay, don’t scream.” 

“You mean like you did?” Karly retorts dryly. 

You shake her. “I’m serious!” When Karly doesn’t say anything, you take it as a sign to continue with your story. “I saw Jungkook.” 

Karly blinks, then grabs your arm right back. “Wait, Jeon Jungkook, as in the guy you’ve been crushing on since second year?” 

“Yes!” You whine, throwing yourself onto the couch all over again. 

“The one you had to work together on a project with and nearly cried even though you guys just had to submit a paper?” 

“Yes!” 

“The one who said hi to you in the library that one time and you tried to put your elbow on the table afterwards but you missed and hit your head instead?” 

You pause, scowling. “Okay, now you’re just being mean. Are you done?” 

Karly is laughing. “Oh my god. What are the chances of you seeing him now?” 

“There’s more,” You groan out. 

“Really? Honestly that yell could have been just for seeing him again and that would have made sense—!” 

You ignore her. “He’s friends with Jimin. He’s friends with Irene, too. He was invited to her wedding.” 

“Wait, Jimin is friends with Irene or Jungkook is friends with Irene—?” 

“He won’t pay for the flight though. It’s too expensive. I can attest to that.” 

Karly holds a finger up, trying to connect the dots. “When did you look up flight prices—?” 

“So he invited me on a cross country road trip to Irene’s wedding.” 

Karly frowns. 

You sigh. “Jungkook invited me on a cross country road trip to Irene’s wedding.” 

“Oh! Oh!” Karly’s eyes widen. “Oh my god, that’s huge. Are you gonna go?” 

“I don’t know!” You whine. “Jungkook mentioned it would be a four day drive to get there. I don’t know if I can survive four days in a car with him! We’ve never been that close, what if it gets awkward?” 

Karly ponders this. “I really don’t think it’s in Jungkook’s nature to be awkward with someone—especially someone he’s had a history with.” She sees the look of disbelief you give her. “Well, even if that history was really limited. What makes you think it’ll be awkward? Was it awful seeing him tonight?” 

“No!” You cry, straightening into a sitting position so your legs drape over the side of the couch. You force yourself to calm down. “It… it was pretty good actually.” 

Karly raises an eyebrow, amusement dancing in her eyes. “Really now.” 

“Yeah…” You reply, trailing off. “We sat across from each other during the dinner and we talked most of the night, surprisingly. I guess because we were sort of acquaintances we’ve always known about each other, so it wasn’t like we didn’t know how to ask questions to each other. And Jungkook… he’s easy to talk to as he’s always been and he’s so nice and positive and he has a dimple on his cheek when he smiles…” You finish slowly, noticing your racing heart that has come up as a result of this conversation and of your memory. You realize the predicament you’re in, further emphasized by Karly’s growing grin. You groan. “Shut up.” 

Karly looks like a Cheshire cat. “I didn’t say anything.” 

You grab onto one of the throw pillows and properly hit her in the face. “You’re saying many things right now, you bitch!” 

Karly takes the pillow from you and proceeds to whack you in the shoulder. “Not outloud!” 

“So you admit it!” You accuse, pointing at her. 

Karly yells. “Just admit you still have a crush on him!” 

Your groan turns into a cry. “Don’t say it outloud! Now I have to deal with it!” 

Your roommate sighs. “Bitch, I can tell you exactly how to deal with this. You’re gonna go on this road trip with Jungkook and see if you guys vibe—you honestly will not find a better way to discover your compatibility with him. If it works out, then you get more than a plus one to the wedding. If it doesn’t work out, just skip the wedding and take the first flight back home. Cut off your friendship with Jimin while you’re at it—it’s the only way to ensure you’ll never have to run into Jungkook again.” 

You pout. “That seems a little dramatic.” 

Karly thinks for a second, then she nudges you. “Remind me again about that quote your high school English teacher used to always parade around.” 

You stare at her for a moment, because you know exactly what point she’s trying to make. Still, you decide to humor her. And yourself. “‘You’ll never know if you’ll sink, swim, or float, until you’re willing to take the plunge’.” You level Karly with another gaze. Your friend has a point. You missed any chance to hang out with Jungkook during your college years—partly because your friend groups never intersected, but mostly because of your internalized fear of fucking up. But now that you are just a little older and just a little more versed in the art of conversing and befriending—maybe Karly is right. Maybe this is your chance to see if a different set of timing could make a difference. 

So you sigh. 

“I guess I should text Jungkook, huh.” 

Karly pats you on the shoulder. “Take the plunge, my dude.” 

.

You do take the plunge. You take Jungkook’s business card out from the pocket of your dress and dial the number. He expresses excitement—and also relief. 

These things lead up to the current moment. Eight o’clock in the morning: you lingering in the kitchen with a cup of coffee, your suitcase by the door, and a roommate keeping you company. 

You don’t realize how nervous you are until you get a text from Jungkook. 

Jungkook (8:03am): i’m here! u can buzz me up so i can help u with your stuff :) 

You (8:03am): it’s ok jungkook it’s just a suitcase. i’ll be down in a second! 

You pocket your phone, and Karly can read the expression across your face before you realize what is going on. She straightens up. “He’s here?” 

“Yeah.” You rinse your coffee cup and make your way towards the door. “Did you want to come down with me?” 

Karly stops and gives you a look. “I thought that was already implied.” 

“Well, thanks, that’s really nice—!” 

“Someone has to give you an embarrassing goodbye.” 

“There it is.” You sigh. You don’t say anything as you and Karly exit the apartment and make your way down the hall into the elevator. It only takes a few seconds for the elevator to lower down to the ground floor, where you and Karly exit and make your way to the front of the apartment complex. 

You swear your heart beats just a little faster as soon as you see Jungkook near the front entrance of the building. He’s wearing a pair of black jackets with an oversized denim jacket and currently looking down at his phone—overall appearing so tall and pretty and otherworldly. For a brief second, you are taken by the fact that for the next four days, he’ll be yours. 

Jungkook looks up as soon as he hears the door opening and he smiles. “Hey you.” 

You smile, albeit a little lopsided and dreamy. “Hi.” 

Jungkook walks towards you immediately. “Here, let me help you with that.” He reaches a hand out and gently takes the handle of your suitcase before you can say anything. Just as he’s taking the suitcase from you, Karly emerges from the building. “Oh, sorry about that.” 

Karly waves him off. “Don’t be. I’m Y/N’s roommate—I’m just here to see her off.” 

Jungkook stares at her for a moment, then he snaps his fingers. “Wait, I remember you. You went to college with us too.” He jerks his chin towards you. “You hung out with Y/N a lot, right?” 

“Yeah, I’m Karly.” She holds out her hand for Jungkook to shake. “And you’re right, she and I hung out a lot. We were roommates back then too.” 

Jungkook nods in understanding, before shoving his hand into his pocket. His other hand is still holding onto your suitcase. “Well, I promise to take good care of Y/N.” 

Karly smacks her teeth against the side of her mouth as she points at him. “You’re a good man, Jungkook.” She pauses for a moment, seeming to contemplate a new thought. You recognize the look immediately, and your fingers twitch as if you want to strangle her. Or at least let her know you’re throwing her a look of murderous intent. But of course, Karly doesn’t see it. And even if she had, you doubt she’d care. “But no funny business, alright.” 

You gape at her. “Karly!” 

Jungkook coughs at that. “I-It’s just a drive—y-you don’t need to worry about that.” He does, however, turn away to hide the red that dusts his cheeks. 

As soon as Jungkook’s back is facing you, you whirl around to shoot Karly with a glare. “Karly, you’re lucky I’m leaving for the next four days or I would not hesitate to figure out how to make stuffocation look like an accident!” You hiss out between teeth without taking a breath. 

Karly glares right back. “You’re really dumb, aren’t you? The fact that he recognizes me because he saw you hanging out with me on campus doesn’t strike any chords? Even though, like you said, you guys weren’t really friends?” 

You blink. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” 

Karly widens her eyes. “What the fuck do you mean? Are you dumb with all the boys or just Jungkook?” 

“What do you mean!” You snap back. 

“So, Y/N, ready to go?” 

You whirl back around to find Jungkook now standing in front of you and Karly. He must have finished packing your suitcase in the trunk of his car and is now looking over at you with a tilt in his head. 

So you force a smile. “Of course,” You say, turning to Karly. “I was just saying bye to my roommate.” 

He nods in understanding, sparing one more glance at Karly before seeming to decide against it because he looks away. He’s still a little red at Karly’s previous comment. “We should get going then.” 

“Sure.” You look over at your roommate. “See you, bitch.” 

Karly waves back, grinning wildly. You just know she has several other thoughts she’d like to share with you, but has probably deemed you embarrassed enough. Lucky for you, she keeps her mouth shut. 

Unlucky for you, without Karly to be a barrier of distraction, this leaves you alone with Jungkook. You slide into the passenger seat of his car, still not yet processing the weight of what you’ve just agreed to. You fiddle alone for a second before Jungkook is opening the driver’s side and shifting into his seat. 

There is a silence as Jungkook is starting the car, and a part of you wants to die. Or at least have the ground swallow you whole. Holy fuck, what did you just sign up for? 

Your mind somehow takes five seconds to turn into complete shambles that you almost miss Jungkook’s question. 

“Here, I’m giving you an important mission,” Jungkook says, rummaging through the various chords that lay over the center console before producing an aux cord. “Should you choose to accept.” 

He’s got on such a serious expression you momentarily forget about your anxiety. His usage of the iconic line from Mission Impossible makes you laugh—a breathy sort of noise that escapes when your mind is too full. You still take the aux cord. “Oh my god—ever heard of bluetooth?” 

He pouts. “It hasn’t even been five minutes and you’re already insulting my beautiful Celia!” 

You raise both your eyebrows. “Celia?” 

“Yeah, that’s the name of my car.” He catches the bewildered look you give him before angling himself back to face the steering wheel, where he shifts his console into drive and makes a turn onto the main street. “If you’re already weirded out by the fact I have a name for my baby, then you’re in for a very long four days, Miss. Y/N.” 

You giggle, feeling that distraction of nerves start to come off your shoulders. “Not weird at all.” You pause. “Ryan is the name of my car.” 

“Ah!” He holds one arm out in a grand gesture. “You see, not so strange after all.” He steals a glance at you, watching as you’re about to connect your phone to the aux cord. “Wait!” He says, pointing a finger at you. 

You look up at him, wide eyes. 

He’s still holding an arm up. “How’s your music taste?” 

You’re still giving him your surprised expression. “You scared me!” 

He laughs, returning his hand back to the steering wheel. “Sorry, sorry. I have to ask though—I’d rather know now than later, so I can kick you out and not feel as bad about it.” 

Your laughter seems to melt away the last of your nervous energy. “Nice to know you’re putting all your cards out now.” You look down at your phone. “Regarding my music taste… it’s whatever you want dude! I have some lo-fi on here, some pop, alternative, Broadway, anime openings… an ‘everything’ playlist. Honestly, the world is your oyster.” 

“How about we start with your ‘everything’ playlist,” Jungkook suggests. “That way I can judge you immediately.” 

“Were you always this charming, Jeon Jungkook?” You retort. “Or has graduation changed you?” 

“Oh, I’ve always been this charming—you just never noticed.” 

That comment, however, goes over your head as you focus down on your playlist. You look over, selecting the shuffle option as Taylor Swift’s soft music from her newest album fills the air. Another silence fills the car, but it’s much more peaceful and comfortable. You allow yourself to settle further into the passenger seat of Jungkook’s car. 

“So,” You start after a moment. Jungkook hums to let you know he’s paying attention. “What inspired the name Celia?” 

Jungkook brightens at the question. “She was this character from a book I read when I was younger. The Night Circus? Anyways, the book is about these two illusionists who try to one up each other with their skills of magic, but they end up falling in love. Celia is the name of one of those illusionists.” 

You grin. “Sounds like a very cute crush.” 

Jungkook grins back. 

The drive out of the city continues like this. The pair of you cover the topic of books, of music, of your favorite animes. Jungkook just has this magical power of ensuring the tension dissipates from your mind and stays gone—whether it’s through his relaxed nature or easy-going teasing or his ability to ease the conversation from one topic to the next. It feels like every conversation you and Jungkook had in college, whether vague or circling around classes, all have led up to this moment. It seems like everytime you or Jungkook run out of things to talk about pertaining to a certain topic, you would bring up memories from college and just continue from there. Everything feels natural. 

It continues to feel natural even as you and Jungkook slowly start to see the edges of the city landscape fade away. The high rises fade into shorter buildings and smaller business areas that surround the bustling city scene. You watch as those buildings and business areas become rows of houses. Residential areas in the suburbs, passing by the occasional school or corner restaurants. 

“Before we enter the wide unknown,” Jungkook starts up, breaking the quiet that has enveloped the car. “You want to pick up lunch? You hungry?” 

You haven’t even realized how much time has gone by until you look at the clock on Jungkook’s dashboard and notice that it’s past noon. You widen your eyes at the sight. “Wow, I didn’t even realize so much time had passed.” 

“Yeah, we drove through a few cities. Time flies when you’re having fun, huh?” 

“You wish,” You tease, sticking your tongue out. “So, what, do we stop at a Cheesecake factory or something?” 

Jungkook blinks. “I thought you were poor—why would we stop at the Cheesecake factory? And why is that the first restaurant that comes to your mind?” 

You wave your hands. “It was just a suggestion!” 

“Well, I’m realizing that I should probably let you know that the motel I picked for us to drive to tonight is pretty far out—Google Maps says we probably won’t get there until midnight, and that’s with us driving straight through.” 

“Midnight? Fuck, Jungkook. Will we make it to the wedding a day early or something?” 

“Ha, ha, no. I’ll go over the schedule I planned out tomorrow. Basically, I want to try and cover most of our ground on the first day so we can take the rest of the trip easy. But I thought I’d let you know now that sitting in a restaurant probably won’t be the most time responsible idea.” 

“That’s true.” You look out the window again and see the golden arches of McDonalds appear within your line of sight. “Let’s just stop at McDonalds.” 

Jungkook follows your gaze. “Alright, down. Let’s do it.” 

He exits off the freeway, following down a route that takes him almost immediately towards the McDonalds parking lot. Since this restaurant is still within the lines of the city, it’s not completely deserted. There are a few cars in the parking lot, even fewer cars in the drive-through line. Because of this, ordering the food only takes a few minutes. Both of you get chicken nuggets, sodas, and large orders of french fries. 

“You know, we’re really living like kings,” You comment as Jungkook drives out and makes his way back onto the freeway. “College graduates, both somehow able to secure a job, and still ordering chicken mcnuggets.” 

Jungkook shrugs. “I wasn’t told this is what adulthood would be like. But I’m not complaining. My 10-year-old self is singing in so much joy right now.” He says this as he’s stuffing a handful of fries into your mouth. You laugh, and hand him a napkin. 

You turn the music back on. The pair of you silently munch on your chicken nuggets, as you angle your head towards the side window once again. As Jungkook drives, the numbers of structural spaces become more scattered the longer you both continue down the freeway. 

The anime opening to Haikyuu starts playing when you turn back to Jungkook and realize that he’s trying to close the box of his chicken nuggets. You move right away, taking the cardboard from him and closing it yourself. “Let me know if you need anything, Jungkook. Think of me as your co-pilot.” 

He laughs gently. “Is that the rule of the passenger seat?” 

You shrug, putting the empty box into the McDonalds bag near your feet. “For me at least. Everytime I do one of these drives with family, the person in the passenger seat has to open the snacks, make conversation, and always stay awake with the driver. It’s just courtesy.”

Jungkook is smiling softly now, mostly to himself, but it lights the corners of his eyes that makes you momentarily unable to look away. “You wanna tell me about your family?” 

So you do. Your voice becomes softer as you continue, but Jungkook listens to every single word you say. 

True to his observation, it’s not long before the pair of you are surrounded by the wide unknown. Houses in the suburbs become farmhouses and farms. Conversations fade from your family to another comfortable silence as you continue gazing out the window. Jungkook requests your lo-fi playlist at some point, filling the car with the soft and distorted hums. It allows your mind to wander as you stare out the window. The empty stretches of land around you are filled with greenery, with mountains, cutting right through the perfect blue of the sky above you. 

By 4:00PM, your entire body is starting to feel the ache of having been seated for long hours on end. You feel the tightness in the muscles of your thigh, the bones in your knees. 

Jungkook must be feeling the same, because as soon as a sign for a rest stop comes on, he exits the freeway and pulls into a large parking lot. There’s a restroom on the side, but the area is surrounded by trees with mountains standing in the background. 

Jungkook stops the car. “We should get out for a bit to move our legs.” 

You’re already tugging on the latch that’ll open the car door. “I’m already feeling it in my knees.” You open the door and immediately extend your legs out onto the solid ground beneath you. You let out a sigh of satisfaction, and Jungkook laughs from next to you. 

He’s opening his own car door soon after, but he straightens up into a standing position pretty quickly and stretches upwards. He closes the car door behind him, watching as you eventually pull yourself together to do the same. 

You turn to face Jungkook. “I’m gonna use the restroom.” You gesture towards the building and earn a nod from Jungkook, who mentions something about doing the same thing. You meet back at the car a few minutes later. 

Jungkook gestures to the trees surrounding the parking lot. “Want to take a walk around the area? Keep the blood flowing to our legs.” 

You nod. “That sounds like a good idea.” 

“Why don’t you get started. I’ll catch up.” Jungkook watches you leave, before opening the trunk of his car and rummaging around. 

He does catch up with you, quickly enough that you hardly notice that he had sent you out first. You hear his footsteps, and the call of your name. You turn around. “Jungkook!” 

The sight before you makes you waver slightly, as bouts of shyness overtake you. Standing before you is Jungkook, with his camera in hand. The lens is pointed right at you. As soon as you’re staring straight into the camera, Jungkook grins. “Say hi!” 

You whine, whirling back around and covering your face. “Are you filming me right now?” 

“I’m a photographer at heart, what did you expect?” Jungkook teases back. “Besides, it’s really pretty around here. You think I won’t film it?” 

You snort, starting your walk around the parking lot. “Oh yeah, because there aren’t any parking lots and trees and bathroom stops at home.” 

Jungkook is quiet for a second. “That’s not what I meant.” 

You turn to stare right into the lens of his camera. “Then the mountains, right?” 

He’s quiet for another second. “Sure.” He does, however, sound a little disappointed. You do not notice this. 

The pair of you stay quiet as you make your round around the parking lot, taking in the mountains from different angles. The walk around is mostly just to rid of the sensation of your legs falling off, but it’s still a nice view to admire. As soon as you finish a complete round, you and Jungkook return back to the car. You watch as he carefully places his camera into his camera bag before you’re both back in your seats. 

Jungkook turns to you. “Ready to get going again?” He looks at the control panel behind his steering wheel. “We’ll probably have to stop for gas in a few hours. But after that, it’s straight to the hotel.” 

You settle back into the passenger seat. “I guess we already have our dinner plans then.” You’re referring to the gas station. 

Jungkook grins. “I’m down for that.” 

And so, the trip continues back on the freeway. With the lo-fi playing in the background, you watch as the sun tears through the blue sky, as the sun finally begins it’s dip to the other side. The singular color once spread across the pane of atmosphere now conjugates around the sun crawling behind the mountain—creating a diffusion of new colors. The corner of the mountain emits an explosion of oranges, pinks, and purples. 

You lift your head from the window, eyes taking in the rainbow of pastels around the now fading sun. “Wow, Jungkook, look at that sunset.” 

He snorts. “You wanna talk about things that you can’t see back in the city?” 

You pout. “But it looks so pretty, see!” You keep gesturing towards the sunset. 

Jungkook relents just enough to spare a glance in the direction. He hums. “Yeah, it’s pretty.” He looks back at the road. “Can’t really find a view like that in the city.” 

You spend a little more time admiring the sunset than Jungkook does, for obvious reasons. You’ve seen a sunset plenty of times before in the past, but the context of this whole situation makes you unable to look away from it. You’re really out here, stuck in a car with someone you have never hung out with for longer than a few minutes. But you are enjoying yourself. There's peace in that. 

So you watch until the sun dips below the mountain, momentarily leaving the sky in a navy color. 

The next time Jungkook speaks, the area around you is much darker, and the sky is nearly black. “You hungry now?” 

You lift your head from the seat, not even realizing you were drifting off. You’re thinking about Irene, wondering if you should have texted her directly congratulating her on the wedding rather than just simply sending in the RSVP. “Sure. We eat as the car eats, right?” 

Jungkook smiles, a gesture you can barely make out from the headlines. “Of course.” 

This goes on for a few more miles until the sign for a gas station comes up. A few other cars linger near the dispensers. Jungkook parks near his choice and gets out of the car. You follow behind him. He’s already sliding his credit card into the machine, and the sight makes you reach over to grab his wrist. 

“I should pay, you’ve been driving all day!” 

He shakes his head, waving you off. “We’ll take turns, okay?” He looks at you. “Buy me dinner tonight too, that sound fair?” 

You pout, leaning back as you cross your arms. “Not really, but I guess I’ll have to accept it.” 

He grins. “You are correct.” 

As soon as the gas pump alerts you of the filled tank, Jungkook returns the pump back to the machine and locks his car. Together, the two of you make your way towards the convenience store, where the bell above rings to alert the workers of your presence. Nods are exchanged as you and Jungkook tear through the aisles to find anything that could satisfy your cravings. You return back with family size bags of hot cheetos and beef jerky, while Jungkook holds his selection of roasted seaweed and Doritos. You select your drinks together before returning to the cashier. 

It’s nearing 9:00PM as you and Jungkook return back to his car, where you slide back into your seats and immediately tear into your bags of salt and sodium. 

“How are you doing?” You ask as Jungkook finishes his first bag of roasted seaweed. 

Jungkook pulls out his phone, scrolling through the final stretch needed to reach the hotel. “Yeah, about four more hours to the motel.” He looks over at you. “I’m good. The salt in this seaweed really helps. How are you doing?” 

You nod immediately. “Great. Perfect.” 

He smiles, shifting his console to drive and pulling out of the gas station. “I’m used to these weird hours. Remember how I told you I traveled around a bit with Mingyu and Wonwoo? There was this one day we only slept for an hour or something? It sucked, I think I almost passed out that day. But yeah, this is honestly not even that bad.” He turns to look at you. “I think the good company helps, too.” 

You roll your eyes, grinning. “You flatter me, Jeon.” 

Slowly, 8PM turns into 10PM. One glance at Google maps tells you that you’re still two hours from the hotel. Even though you’re not the one driving, and although you haven’t endured any physical activity that could result in this exhaustion, you still find yourself growing tired. Something about sitting under the sun, sitting in a vehicle that rocks side to side with a consistent hum—it makes your mind work slowly and therefore brings out the sleepiness quicker. 

You settle deeper into your seat. 

Jungkook giggles from next to you. “You tired already?” 

You pout slowly, eyes closed just enough. “I’m not a morning person and you made me wake up at 8!” 

“Sure, sure, of course.” 

There’s a pause. 

You ponder a question for a moment. It’s something that you would never dare ask Jungkook if you had been more awake and more alert. But you’re tired, and your defenses are lowered, and it means you are more prone to asking questions. “Hey, Jungkook? Did you have any girlfriends when we were in college?” 

Jungkook doesn’t answer immediately. “Where’s this coming from?” He asks instead. 

You shrug, making a dismissive noise as your shoulders rise up. “Curiosity.” 

A pause. “I went on a few dates, but I never had a serious relationship.” 

“No way.” You lift your head up from the seat. “But I remember seeing you hang out with the occasional girl in the quad, or at some restaurants around the school.” 

Jungkook smiles. It’s hard to read the look in his eyes. They’re focused on the road in front of him, but they seem almost hazy and faraway. “Like I said, I went on a few dates. I did really want to get into a long term relationship in college. A lot of my friends had them, that’s where my parents met, so I was really open to the idea of at least experimenting. There were a lot of girls that I thought were nice, easy-going, or just really pretty, so I tried my hand in the whole dating thing.” 

“And it didn’t work out?” You coax out gently. 

“Not really,” He continues. He steals a glance at you. “We’d go on a few dates, but none of them ever felt substantial. I think girls see me and have a certain expectation—an expectation I couldn’t meet. So I never could picture myself in a long term relationship with any of them.” 

You tilt your head towards him. “There must have been someone…” 

“Well… there was one girl.” Jungkook starts after a moment. He’s not looking at you this time. “We had a few classes together earlier—we weren’t in the same major program. I don’t even know if I’d say we were close or anything. We just had a few classes and saw each other around on occasion. But the conversations we did have during class or outside of class just felt more real. Honestly, I could have been totally wrong about her. I could have just been blinded by all these expectations I was putting on her, which is ironic. But she was the only person I could actually see myself being in a long term relationship with. Or at least try.” 

You hum, still facing towards him in your seat. “Why didn’t you try anything then? You’re a good guy, Jungkook. I’m sure she would have wanted to try with you too.” 

“I guess I was just afraid of pushing it and scaring her off. I thought it was better to stay friends with her than try to pursue something. She never gave me an indication that she felt the same.” 

“And how do you feel now?” 

There’s a pause this time. “I don’t know honestly. We remained friends up until graduation but, uh, never saw her again. I do wonder from time to time how she’s doing.” 

“You should reach out to her,” You advise softly. “Since you guys were friends before, I’m sure asking her out just to catch up won’t seem so weird.” You grin at him. “You need to make your move.” 

It is then that Jungkook turns to look at you. He looks for a little longer this time, eyes focused entirely on you. Underneath the small crescent of the moon above, you are still able to make out his facial features. His cheeks, his nose, his eyes—the latter is glimmering, like he knows something that you don’t. 

“I’m working on that,” He mumbles softly. You turn your head back towards the road. 

. 

You wake up the next morning feeling groggy, dirty, and messy. Your head lifts up from a pillow you can only vaguely remember falling on, laying on top of a bed you only vaguely remember throwing yourself in. There’s sunlight pouring into the room, but it feels like early morning sun. There’s a crisp in the air that you can feel, that you see out of the window. Right outside is the gathering of bushes and trees, a bright blue sky.

You are in the motel. 

Slowly, you push yourself into a sitting position, until you’re resting atop the white linen of your bed. Across the room, snuggled in his own twin bed, is Jungkook. His lashes are fanning across his cheekbones, his lips are parted, and his breathing is slow and soft.

It isn’t until Jungkook shifts in bed that you realize you’ve been watching him like a creep. Hastily, you tear your gaze away and decide to focus your gaze down. You notice immediately that you are not underneath the blankets. Instead, you are lying underneath Jungkook’s jacket. 

You roll the jacket off your frame, discovering that you are still in last night’s clothes—which explains why you were feeling so groggy and discombobulated. You look across the floor of the hotel room. Your suitcase is near the foot of your bed, and your phone sits on your nightstand connected to your charger. 

Vaguely, you recall what had happened the previous night—how Jungkook drove into the hotel room nearing midnight and the exhaustion was so overpowering that you and Jungkook blindly asked for any room with two twin beds before following through and practically collapsing into your respected beds. 

You definitely did that, which explains why you were on top of the bed, why you’re still in yesterday’s clothes, and why Jungkook’s jacket was your blanket. Stealing another glance at Jungkook: underneath the blankets and in a different t-shirt—you can assume that he was able to take a shower before lying down. 

With a sigh, you push off Jungkook’s jacket and lay it down on the bed next to you. Hoping not to disturb Jungkook, you slide out of bed and lower your suitcase to the ground. After fishing out a new set of clothes, you decide to take a shower. 

The warmth from the shower is the best breath of fresh air you’ve gotten since hitting the road with Jungkook. It feels like your body is going through a battery recharge, and it’s one you take your time with. You step out of the shower, running the towel through your hair and drying yourself enough to slip on your outfit for the day. The towel is thrown around your neck as you step out of the shower, letting the steam follow you out of the bathroom. 

Jungkook is still sleeping as you step out, which is good otherwise you’d feel bad for having disturbed his sleep time. After all the driving he did yesterday, you figure he deserves a few extra hours regardless of what the schedule calls for. 

You continue running the towel through your hair as you pick up your phone. Strangely, you do not remember connecting it to a charger before knocking out, but you pick it up regardless to see the 9:00AM time across your screen. 

There’s a quiet that takes over, in which you’re sitting perched comfortably on your bed and scrolling through your phone as Jungkook continues to drift a few feet away from you. 

About thirty minutes seem to pass before Jungkook is moaning softly to himself, letting out a puff of air as he slowly opens his eyes. His arms extend above him, knocking into the headboard and making him curse softly to himself. His eyes open as he lowers his hands to inspect the damage before immediately looking over towards you. 

He blinks, a tired smile overtaking his lips as he arches his back into a stretch. “Hey,” He greets, voice rough and scratchy and making your heart clench. Damn thing. “You’re awake. You knocked out pretty quickly as soon as we got the room.” 

You laugh. “Yeah, I honestly figured that.” You pick up his jacket, as if he hadn’t been the one to lay it on you those hours ago. “Thanks for trying to help me get comfortable.” You gesture towards the nightstand. “Did you find my charger too?” 

Jungkook sits up as he continues a small round of stretches and yawns. “I did,” He says. “You were barely coherent, but made enough sense to tell me where it was in your bag. Sorry for going through it, by the way.” 

You shake your head, waving him off. “No worries. Thank you again, Jungkook.” 

The pair of you stare at each other for a few moments, before that silence is broken by Jungkook’s phone going off. You look down as Jungkook snatches his own phone off the nightstand. He scrolls through something, before placing it back. 

“So, what’s the plan for today?” You ask, bringing your fingers through your hair to comb and give you a distraction. 

“Oh! Right.” Jungkook swings his legs off the side of the bed. “We have a slower day today. The hotel I picked is only about five hours away? We’re driving through the mountains today, so there’s this place I want to visit that has a little restaurant and everything. It’ll be a cute pit stop.” 

You nod. “Awesome, okay.” You curl your fingers around the strands of now loose strands of hair. 

It takes another hour until you and Jungkook are packed up again and ready to leave. A quick stop to the lobby provides both of you with a bagel and cup of coffee each as your breakfast. All before you’re once again sliding into the passenger seat of Jungkook’s car. 

You roll your shoulders before clicking your seatbelt in. “Ready for another long day?” 

“Of course.” He digs through his center console, producing his aux cord. “Your mission,” He says dramatically, not unlike yesterday. “Should you choose to accept.” 

You laugh gently, taking the cord. “You in love with Mission Impossible or something? This is the second time in two days you’re quoting it to me.” 

And this is how your day starts off—talks of Mission Impossible films that bleed into conversations about movies. 

The day at 10 o’clock in the morning is bright and blue as Jungkook drives back onto the freeway and continues down the road. The first few hours consist of the surrounding flatland, of green grass and high mountains all around. Conversations between you and Jungkook are a little more scattered today, but there’s a new level of comfort about the situation. With both of you well rested, it invites a more relaxed atmosphere as you pass the occasional joke or story time between the pair of you. 

As the sun continues to travel higher in the sky, Jungkook’s car starts it’s approach up the mountain. The trees start enveloping the pair of you into a newer, higher world. Not only that, but whenever you and Jungkook reach a clearing, it exposes a dip of lakes, grass, and mountains. And you, always having enjoyed the views of nature, keep an open eye for every single thing. 

You see Jungkook’s choice of destination before he does, and you gasp excitedly. 

Up ahead is a cloud of pink, white, and red flowers covering an entire mountain side. There is an occasional pop of cedar trees amongst the covering of pink, white, and red, but the colors are so poignant that it captures your attention immediately. 

You point to it. “Is that where we’re going?” 

Jungkook grins. “Surprise!” He’s selected this spot before offering the invitation to let you come along, but you’re not complaining. You’ve never been to a flower farm before, despite having heard about them and seen pictures of them for most of your childhood. You continue to watch with wide eyes and bright smiles as Jungkook drives closer and closer to the destination, finally parking in the appropriate lot after paying the fee. 

You’re practically vibrating in your seat with excitement. “Jungkook, Jungkook, c’mon let’s go, let’s go!” You push on the latch and nearly tumble out onto the ground. You straighten to stand on your feet, before meeting Jungkook near the trunk of his car. Surprise, surprise, he pulls out his camera and loops the strap over his head. 

He’s grinning as he closes the trunk. “You’re a little excited, aren’t you?” 

“A little?” You echo, clapping your hands, seemingly unable to wipe the grin off your face. “Jungkook, this is a flower farm! It’s so exciting!” 

So you dart off with Jungkook following closely behind you. The parking lot is located at the top of the flower farm, so the tour around the fields is a downwards one towards the bottom. A small pathway maps out a route for you to follow as you take in the various lines of flowers and colors. One short glimpse at the brochure tells you that these are spring flowers, and that you and Jungkook are visiting during the perfect season. You and Jungkook continue through your makeshift tour in silence, taking in the flowers as well as the view that extends out far beyond your line of sight while Jungkook snaps photographs behind you. Words don’t need to be said when everything around you says it all. 

At the bottom of the field is a cafe, a small brick building with an outdoor seating area facing the now upward flower display. You and Jungkook order sandwiches and soda, and take your seats outside as you wait for your number to be called. There are a fair amount of people today at the field, most of which you can see ahead roaming through the flowers ahead. 

“Have you ever been to a flower farm before?” Jungkook asks, as he glances over at you to see how bright your expression is. 

You smile as you turn to him. “No, never. But thank you for bringing me here, it’s beautiful here.” 

Jungkook smiles, looking a little smug. He looks proud of himself. “I’ve always wanted to come here, so I’m glad I was able to bring you along.” It looks like he wants to say more, but the number that rests between Jungkook’s fingers is called out, interrupting the conversation. He returns a moment later with the food. “I actually wanted to ask you something,” He says, taking the sandwich plate off the tray and placing it in front of you. 

You take the napkins that are being offered to you. “What’s up?” 

He settles down into his seat. “I didn’t get to return the question that you asked me last night.” 

It takes you a second to realize what he’s referring to. Immediately, you feel yourself turn red as you press your lips together. You were definitely drowsy last night, and hadn’t put too much consideration in the aftermath of asking Jungkook about his college relationships. You instead try for a laugh, as you wave him off. “Well, you don’t need to ask me. It’s pretty boring.” 

“Nonsense,” Jungkook brushes off, taking another bite of his sandwich. “So tell me, did you get into any relationships in college?” 

You laugh, albeit a little nervously. “No, not really. I never even went on any dates before—I guess, like you, I just couldn’t see myself in any long term relationship with anyone that seemed to like me.” 

“Well, how about crushes on your end? Did you like anyone?” 

You gaze over at Jungkook—taking in his wide curious eyes, his soft voice, his contagious laugh. The memories of him waving at you in class, of him catching up to you afterwards to continue previous conversations, of him going out of his way to say hi to you in the library. Jungkook has always been thoughtful, considerate, and soft along the edges. How could you not have crushed on him during college? 

And how could you not continue to have these lingering feelings for him afterwards? 

You think about your own advice you had given to Jungkook. You should reach out to her. Since you guys were friends before, I’m sure asking her out just to catch up won’t seem so weird. You need to make your move. Could you even follow your own advice? 

You look down before Jungkook could start asking questions about your staring. “There was this one guy,” You start, trying for an uneasy laugh. “But I don’t think he ever noticed me. Well, that’s a lie. I guess we were kind of friends? I think it’s more along the lines of me being out of his league.” 

“That’s depressing,” Jungkook notes as he finishes his sandwich. You hardly even noticed him inhaling the thing. “How could you be out of a guy’s league? You’re so smart and funny and easy to talk to—if anything, a guy would probably be out of your league.” He leans forward, bringing you close enough where you can clearly make out the mole underneath his lip. “Tell me about this punk. So I can tell you he’s not good enough for you.” 

You laugh, keeping your gaze on him. You doubt he’d be so confident had he known about ‘this punk’. “He isn’t a punk,” You remark quietly. “He’s really nice, and really sweet. I was pretty quiet in college. Definitely introverted and kept to myself and had a hard time making friends. Although I would have honestly barely considered him a friend, he just made me feel like my time was meaningful and my attention was valuable to him.” Jungkook’s eyes continue to bore into yours. “If anything, I just wish he knew how much I admire him.” 

Jungkook’s gaze is unwavering across your face, once again displaying that unreadable expression. Yet, despite that, something glimmers in his eyes and he seems to come to an understanding you yourself don’t know about. That glimmer keeps swimming across the orbs, even as he switches his gaze between your eyes. They flicker down to your lips for a second, and your heart stutters in your chest. 

Jungkook coughs, pulling away from you as he seems to hyper-focus his attention on the soda still in front of him. He looks shy as he steals another glance at you from across the table. “He might not have made you feel that important if you were too scared to tell him how you felt.” 

You look down at your sandwich and take another bite. Something about the way he’s staring holes into the side of your face tells you that he knows something that you don’t. You wonder what he’s thinking. 

Jungkook wears that thoughtful expression for the rest of the visit to the flower field, as the pair of you return back to his car and slide back in your seats. He stays quiet as you resume the trip, slowly making your way back onto the freeway and towards your second motel. 

This kind of quiet is different than the previous silences the pair of you have grown to share over the past twenty-four hours. Unlike the comfortable moments of unspoken words, this is more tense. Like he knows something that you don’t. 

You don’t know what to say, or how to break that silence. You don’t know if perhaps you said something you shouldn’t have, or said something to make him uncomfortable. All of those thoughts are not pleasant ones. 

Jungkook stays quiet for most of the drive through the mountain. The music you have selected is loud enough that seems to drown the tense atmosphere, but the questions still press themselves deeply into your mind. What is he thinking about? 

And worse of all: did he know you were talking about him? 

You and Jungkook only speak a handful of times during the trip. He asks you if you need to use the restroom, if you’re hungry, and if you could play him your favorite anime openings. The pair of you have a handful of laughs about your mutual love for Haikyuu and Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, but most of the drive to the motel is ridden out in silence. 

The pair of you reach the hotel around dinnertime, definitely nowhere as exhausted as you had been the previous night, but just as eager to finally reach your destination. The tension between you and Jungkook has eased slightly, so you can only assume that perhaps he has overcome whatever was bothering him. You yourself have pushed the thought of Jungkook knowing the truth out of your mind. After all, if he had known, you assume he would have brought it up. Or at least called for an Uber to send you home. You assume you would have provided some sort of reaction for the two of you to talk about. But alas, those thoughts follow a conversation that has not happened, and will probably never happen, because you’re sure that you’ll never have to be in a situation that forces your feelings to go out of control once again—! 

“Hi,” Jungkook returns to the hotel clerk behind the desk, a girl to be about your age, who is flickering her gaze between you and Jungkook. A flicker in her eyes tells you that she already has multiple thoughts and assumptions about your relationship. “Do you have a room with two beds?” 

“Oh!” The girl blinks, momentarily looking taken aback. “Of course, let me check.” She turns her attention to the computer screen in front of her. Her eyebrows furrow together. “I’m sorry sir, we only have rooms with one bed available—either a full, queen, or king-size mattress.” 

Jungkook makes a noise in the back of his throat as he taps his credit card on the desk. Just watching from the side, you notice how he swallows, how he looks down, how his cheeks turn red. He turns to you after a moment. “D-Do you, uh, do you mind?” 

It takes you a second to realize what Jungkook is asking. He’s asking if you’d be okay with sharing a bed with him. Him: your college crush, the guy you never really lost feelings for. 

You turn red too. “U-Um…” You press your lips together and swallow. “S-Sure,” You manage, waving your hands out in front of you. “I-I don’t mind. I-If you don’t mind, of course.” 

“I-I don’t mind either.” Jungkook, however, looks like he’s about to combust. He looks a little lost again. He blinks once, twice, and seems to realize that he’s supposed to hand the woman behind the desk his card. “Uh, whichever room is the cheapest.” 

“That’ll be the room with the full-size bed.” She flickers her gaze between the two of you. “If that’s okay.” 

“O-Of course,” He stammers back, allowing the girl to take the card. He looks at you. “Do you mind staying here? I have to go to the bathroom real quick.” 

“S-Sure, go ahead.” A part of you wants to hit your head on the desk. What is happening to you? Why is the mere thought of sharing a bed with Jungkook turning you into a pile of mush? You’re a grown ass woman—! 

“So the two of you on vacation or something?” The woman behind the desk asks. She’s still in the middle of scanning Jungkook’s credit card. 

You try for a smile. “Kind of, we’re going to a friend’s wedding.” 

“I see, that sounds fun.” She smiles. “You know, I have to be honest, I was a little surprised he asked for two beds. You guys would make a cute couple.” 

At the label, you start to turn red. “O-Oh n-no, we’re not a couple at all. That’s very flattering, b-but yeah we’re not together.” 

“Oh, I know,” The girl rebuffs. Her smile looks more like a grin. She places Jungkook’s credit card on the desk, along with a receipt and a pen. “I hope the full size bed will change that.” She gives you a wink. 

You part your lips, unsure what to make of the situation. “What—!” 

“I’m back,” Jungkook says, sliding up from behind you and making you jump slightly. “What did I miss?” 

“Uh…” You wonder if your face is too red or not. It certainly feels that way. “Here!” You push him forward towards the desk. “She scanned your credit card. You just need to sign and we’ll be on our way.” 

If Jungkook notices the stiffness in your posture, he doesn’t comment as he leans forward to sign the receipt. Just over Jungkook’s shoulder is the worker, looking at you with a now shit-eating grin across her lips. Several questions ping through your mind, but you don’t get to ask any of those because Jungkook is turning around with his credit card in hand. 

“Uh, ready to get going?” 

“Sure!” You say, voice a few several pitches higher and you return to wanting the ground to swallow you whole. Jungkook leads the way out of the lobby, and you dare one last glance back towards the woman behind the counter. 

She’s waving a slip of paper in her hand. 

You turn back to Jungkook. “Hey Jungkook, give me a second. I think we forgot to grab something at the desk.” 

It sort of feels like a walk of shame to reach the worker behind the counter, who is still grinning at the sight of you and your internal struggles. She hands you the slip of paper, mouths something that makes you go red, before you’re turning back towards Jungkook. “Good luck,” She had whispered. 

Before you’re reaching Jungkook, you open the paper. At the very top is the WiFi password. 

Underneath the WiFi password, in what you can only assume is her handwriting, is one sentence. Fate said you guys only get one bed- don’t worry, I think he likes you too :-) 

“What was that about?” Jungkook asks. 

You shove the paper into your pocket. “The WiFi password,” You supply. 

The walk to the hotel room is quiet as Jungkook leads the way through the different hallways, corridors, and numbers on plaques. That tense silence is back as he guides the two of you, stopping only when he reaches the number that matches the one on the index card. He gives you a look, and inserts the card key into the slot. The door beeps, and he pushes open the door to find, true to the word of the lady behind the counter, one full-sized bed in the middle of the room. 

For the first few hours, it’s easy to ignore that full-sized elephant in the room. Jungkook takes out his laptop and you guys watch your favorite season of Haikyuu together—it’s season two—or you guys linger about on your phones. It isn’t until nighttime falls into your bones, into your minds, that you realize that you really need to address the new situation. 

“I’m gonna take a shower first, if that’s okay,” You say, already sliding off the bed to gather your belongings from your suitcase. Jungkook is humming along to the Haikyuu ending song, but he stops long enough to accept you taking the first shower. He watches you as you fish pajamas out from your suitcase. “Hey, Jungkook…” You start. “Are you sure you’re cool with this?” You gesture to the bed. “I can sleep on the floor. They give you extra bedding for a reason…” 

“What? No, of course not, I’m not letting you sleep on the floor.” He moves until his knees are pressed into the mattress. “And I’m cool with this. Promise.” He hesitates. “Are you sure you’re okay with this?” 

“Y-Yeah,” You manage, straightening into a standing position with your clothes in hand. “I don’t really move around when I’m sleeping. And I trust you, Jungkook.” You keep your gaze on each other until you break it first, turning around to step into the bathroom. 

You step out many minutes later, hair freshly washed and feeling much more relaxed than before. Jungkook has moved to the desk in the corner of the hotel room, typing away at some emails on his laptops. He does, however, whirl around upon hearing you exit the bathroom. The sight of you in your sweats, t-shirt, and damp hair makes his eyes linger. 

You merely tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. “You can go now,” You say quietly. 

Jungkook nods. “Thanks.” 

Breaking that eye contact again, you turn to the bed and lift the blankets to slide under the covers. You rest your head on the pillow, and immediately start to drift away. 

You are brought back after what only feels like a few minutes, when you hear a light switch turn off followed by the blanket next to you lifting up. You turn slightly towards the other side of the bed. “Jungkook?” You whisper. 

A stillness. “Ah shit, I’m sorry. I was trying to be sneaky.” 

“Mmm…” You mumble softly, turning your body 180 degrees in order to face him. You can vaguely make out the shadow of Jungkook’s outline. “Don’t worry. I’m a really light sleeper. Come on in.” 

There is a shift in the blankets until you feel the additional weight of Jungkook’s figure crawling in next to you. The knowledge that Jungkook is lying right next to you turns your blood hot both with anxiety and because Jungkook brings in a new wave of heat underneath the covers. For a cool spring night, it’s comforting. But also further anxiety-inducing. 

Jungkook shifts and even though the pair of you are on opposite sides of the bed, you can still feel the warmth radiating off his body. In the silence of the hotel room, you can hear Jungkook breathing. 

“Is this okay?” It’s Jungkook asking. His voice is quiet, soothing, and very close to your face. You realize that you guys are facing each other. 

Still, you have to give an answer. “Y-Yeah,” You reply softly. “Goodnight, Jungkook.” 

“Goodnight.” 

You turn onto your back. You try to go to sleep, you really do. But your heart is pounding, and rather than the blood filling your ears, it’s the sound of Jungkook’s breathing. 

“Y/N, you still awake?” Jungkook asks softly. 

You snort. “It’s only been a minute.” 

Jungkook smiles. “Sorry. I just… I have a question. A thought, actually.” 

“What is it?” 

“Well, okay, I don’t want to come off as arrogant or self-centered, but it’s just a question and just this thought that I have…” 

“Jungkook.” You turn back to face him. “You can ask me the question. I don’t mind.” 

“Well, alright.” Jungkook shifts. He’s a little closer now, you can make out the outline of his face. Everything looks slightly more defined now, definitely a result of your eyes adjusting to the darkness. “When you were talking about the guy you had a crush on… you know, when I asked if there was someone you were interested in while we were in college.” 

“Oh, I remember.” Your heart feels fuzzy, even though you have no idea what he’s going to ask you. 

“Okay, um. I guess I just wanted to know. Were you talking about me? 

The world seems to stop tilting on its axis—and all the consequences of that follow along. Everything around you slows to a grind: your heart stops in your chest, and all the air drains out of your lungs. You hold your breath, feeling as if your body has just been dipped underwater. Thousands of thoughts ping through your mind. You feel like that episode of Spongebob where all the file cabinets in your brain are catching aflame. You suddenly feel like you have no thoughts, but too many thoughts at the same time. 

Above all, one question rises above all the rest: how did Jungkook know? 

You’re so wrapped up in your thoughts that you don’t hear your name being called. It isn’t until you feel a hand at your shoulder do you jolt. “H-Huh?” 

“S-Sorry.” Jungkook sounds a lot more nervous now. “You weren’t responding.” 

“I… I was thinking,” You reply lamely. 

A pause. “What’s your answer?” Were you talking about me?

You swallow. Should you tell the truth? Or should you deny everything with the hopes that Jungkook will forget this conversation ever existed? 

The words spill out before you can think of a proper answer. “What if I was?” 

Jungkook is quiet for a moment. “Well…” He starts up again, inching forward towards you. Every move he makes is amplified in your ear, every squeak of the mattress and every rustle of clothing echoed in the small space that is your hotel room. “I’d be kinda frustrated, to be honest. Because when I was talking about my own crush, it might have been about you.” 

At Jungkook’s confession, the world seems to come crashing down on you as everything around tries to catch up to you. Immediately, you assume that perhaps you hadn’t heard Jungkook correctly, or maybe you’re completely misinterpreting what he’s trying to say to you. 

In a perfect world, maybe you’d say something witty and smart. Maybe you’d play along until he snapped. Maybe you’d be fluent in courting talk and understand exactly what he’s trying to say to you. 

But this isn’t a perfect world, and you are neither witty nor smart. You most certainly are not aware of flirtations. You need boys to be as straightforward as possible. Which is why you utter the most comprehensible: “What?” 

You feel a warmth at your hip—Jungkook’s hand against your skin. “Ahhhh.” Jungkook starts, not at all sounding fearful but rather casual. Still the underlying case of shyness, however, because this is still Jungkook. “I forgot you sometimes need simple things spelled out for you. Remember when you emailed our Arts History professor three times because you kept forgetting what font she wanted the assignment in?” 

You flush—Arts History was the class you and Jungkook were forced to pair up together for. Maybe you would have protested it more had you known Jungkook would turn out to be a little shit over it. “That was a one time thing! You’ve been bringing it up for as long as I’ve known you!” 

Jungkook giggles, pulling you closer so your face is against his collarbone and his chin rests on your shoulder. “Shh, okay, okay, I’m sorry.” 

Your face is burning at the feeling of your bodies so close together, your fingers pressed against his shirt and your nose against his skin. He smells like floral fabric softener. “Jungkook…?” You whisper softly, breath fanning his neck. 

Jungkook tilts his head to rest gently against your temple. He stays quiet for a moment, absorbing the moment. “If you did have a crush on me in college, it would be frustrating. Because I had a crush on you too.” 

This time it’s straightforward, just like how you’ve always wanted it. Why can’t you seem to reply? 

“Oh.” 

“I know.” 

You curl your fingers around Jungkook’s shirt. “What if…” You start slowly. “What if I said I still had those feelings?” 

Jungkook seems to think about his answer. “I’d say that I do too.” 

You swallow, nodding in a way that allows him to feel the movement. “Okay then.” 

Without a warning, Jungkook moves to curl his whole arm around your frame. This brings you even closer together. He noses your hairline. “Go to sleep,” He whispers softly. “We can talk about this tomorrow.” 

A part of you wants to say no—that holding off on confessions isn’t what happens in novels or tv shows or movies. But the larger part of you knows that you won’t be able to have a proper discussion like this when you are weak, tired, and vulnerable. Your heart stalls at his consideration, allowing yourself to be content just like this: asleep, cuddling with Jeon Jungkook as you’ve imagined since you first developed your crush. 

It’s much better than the fantasy. 

.

You wake up the next morning with Jungkook’s arms wrapped around you, his soft breathing against your neck and his lips dusting the skin of your neck. There’s a new kind of comfort you find being held like this, and a part of you wants to melt back into his arms. You think you can pretend to be asleep just to stay here a little longer, but the urgency you have to pee and get the day started becomes too pressing. 

Your previous assumptions of Jungkook being a heavy sleeper are confirmed as you manage to untangle yourself from him without so much as a whine from his end. By the time you finish with the bathroom, Jungkook is just beginning to push himself into a sitting position. 

You linger near the foot of the bed. “Good morning,” You greet, almost nervously. For good reason to—the memory of last night is vague but defined well enough where you aren’t sure what the next course of action should be. It’s not like your college ever offered a course about what to do when your crush admits to liking you back. 

Jungkook looks at you from across the bed. He gives you a small smile, a reassuring one. “Morning,” He says back. “How did you sleep last night?” 

You twist your hands together. “Pretty good, actually. How about you?” 

“Me too.” He adjusts his position so he can crawl over to you. He slides his legs over the side of the bed right next to you. He brings his hands towards you, palms up. Although he’s close enough to reach you, he doesn’t. Instead, he asks: “Can I?” 

You don’t say anything, you merely rest your hand in his. He tugs you towards him, stopping only when you’re standing between his legs. He still keeps his fingers curled around yours, turning your hand up to play with your fingers. 

He looks up at you, a soft smile across his lips. “Hi.” 

You smile back. “Hi.” 

He laces your fingers together, resting them between your bodies. “I guess now for the bigger question… how are you feeling?” 

You look down at your hands, deciding you like the way his larger hands cover yours. “H-How did you know I was talking about you?” You ask instead, looking over at him. 

Jungkook shifts his gaze away for a moment. “I don’t know,” He admits earnestly. “You were just looking at me back at the flower field and I had a feeling. And I really think a part of me was hoping you were talking about me.” 

Unable to help yourself, you feel the side of your mouth quirk up into a small smile. “What would you have done if I wasn’t talking about you?” 

He exhales in a laugh. “Honestly, I might have just driven out in the middle of the night and gone over a bridge or something.” 

You laugh, trying to diffuse your smile by pressing your lips but it only works so well. “I was really surprised to hear you liked me back.” 

“Of course!” He exclaims, looking momentarily shocked that you would feel this way. “I wasn’t messing around when I said you were smart, funny, and easy to talk to. That’s what made me really like you when we first met. Whenever we talked you just felt so real and approachable—like I could just be myself around you. And even now, seeing you after graduating and realizing you’re still all of those things. It just makes me like you more.” 

You feel your heart thumping wildly in your chest. You’ve never thought of yourself in the way Jungkook is describing you—you always just assumed that you were in the background, that you’d never be enough. 

Jungkook is looking at you, his eyes big and wide and full of truth. “Is that weird?” He asks. 

You shake your head immediately. “No, no it’s not weird at all.” You shrug a shoulder, giving him a meek smile. “It’s really sweet, actually.” 

Jungkook grins at that, heaving out a breath as a sign of his lowered defenses. “I think you’re sweet too.” 

You groan at that, throwing your head back as Jungkook breaks into a series of giggles. “You’re corny.” 

“You’re not complaining,” He points out. This is true. 

You shrug. “I guess that means I’m expecting us to catch up on three years of terrible flirting.” 

The smile slides off his face. “You’re right.” He brings your joined hands closer together until your whole body is standing closer to his. “Can I ask to kiss you?” 

The four letter K word makes your heart stutter in your chest once more. Your hands are so close to his chest that you can feel his own heart beating, and the thought of Jungkook being equally nervous for this gives you enough confidence to return his question. “Why don’t you ask and find out?” 

He smiles, a bunny smile that crinkles his eyes. “Touche. Can I kiss you?” 

You smile back. “Yes…” You whisper, leaning down just enough for Jungkook to crane his neck up in order to meet each other halfway. It’s just a closed-mouth kiss, a soft weight against your lips.

It’s one that Jungkook pulls away from before you can really enjoy it, really ponder asking for more. “Sorry,” He says immediately, pointing to his mouth. “Morning breath.” 

The pair of you stare at each other for a moment, before bursting out into laughter. That tense atmosphere is gone, replaced inside with that previously casual and comfortable air—as you step away from Jungkook and let him get his morning started. Except this time, the air is filled with open lingering stares, shy smiles, and Jungkook taking your suitcase wordlessly as you exit your hotel room. 

By the time you load into your car, it’s nearing noon and the gas tank in Jungkook’s car is almost empty. The pair of you agree in another champion’s breakfast—gas station food. 

“I swear, we’re both going to have terrible breakout tomorrow during the wedding,” You point out. Despite your words, you still tear into your Nacho Cheese Doritos with the aggression of a gorilla. “I’m going to photograph horribly. Irene will be so embarrassed.” 

“You photograph horribly? Inconceivable!” He says the word just as it is said in The Princess Bride, which makes you burst into another fit of laughter. 

The afternoon pans out the same way it has for the past two days. Jungkook drives onto the freeway, you decide the music, and the conversations fade in and out. Neither of you talk about the events of the previous night or of what happened in the morning—but the way Jungkook reaches out to laces your fingers together is more than enough. 

The town Jungkook has selected to stop for the evening is a five hour drive from the wedding venue—and it’s an actual city space this time, with restaurants and grocery stores and apartments. As soon as Jungkook tells you this information, you are bursting with excitement. It’s been two days since the pair of you actually stopped and lingered in a city environment and you miss it. 

It takes another whole day of driving to reach the city destination, as the first alert you get is the increasing number of cars that have joined you on the freeway. These more busy freeways guide you into the city, where you are greeted with the first sight of buildings, sidewalks, restaurants, and parking lots in days. 

Even though most of these landmarks are simple flashes that you and Jungkook pass through on the way to the hotel he has selected, you keep your eyes glued out of the window in order to take in as much of the surrounding area as you can. You continue to watch as the immediate high rises become more sporadic and spread out, until he’s finally pulling into the hotel. The sun is just setting behind the many buildings along the horizon. Lots of other cars are parked in the parking lot. You can hear other cars, buses, and trunks driving around the background—and you feel strangely comforted by this discovery. 

“Are you okay with sharing another bed today?” Jungkook asks as he guides the pair of you into the lobby. “I may or may not have called to make a reservation earlier when you were in the bathroom.” 

You laugh, feeling giddy at the thought of Jungkook taking the initiative to continue progressing your now slow-growing relationship. “Was that all they had left?” You ask teasingly as you make your way to the counter. 

Jungkook smiles down at you. “Perhaps I didn’t ask…” 

Your lips part. “Jungkook!” 

“What?” He’s laughing now. “I think I’m gonna bow out of any excuse to cuddle with you now that you’ve given me a taste of what that’s like?” 

You’re gasping in the midst of your laughter. “You’re terrible,” You manage. 

So Jungkook checks in—true to his word, he has reserved a single full-sized bed for the room. 

“Hey, so, I was thinking,” He starts as he’s following the map provided to him by the employee with directions about getting to his appropriate room. This hotel is slightly bigger than the off-the-road ones you and Jungkook pulled into, so it takes a little longer to find the room. After a few minutes of turning the map over, you two eventually find the room. 

“What’s up?” You ask as you push open the door and roll your suitcase into the space, with Jungkook following closely behind you. 

“Come here,” Jungkook requests gently, watching as you let go of your suitcase and make your way towards him. You move into his space easily, allowing him to hold you by the waist. “Since we’ve both admitted to missing out on three years of courting, flirting, and dating—I think we should go out to an actual restaurant to have an actual date.” 

You lean back slightly and give him a slightly shocked look. “Really?” 

“Yes!” He says. “Besides, someone has to put their foot down and say that eating only McDonalds and gas station hot dogs is not the right way to go.”

You laugh at that. “True, but we were having so much fun!” 

“Nope!” He exclaims, shaking his head. “The foot is going down, we’re going to an actual restaurant for dinner. Get changed, take a shower, whatever you need to do to freshen up.” There’s a finality in his words as he finally steps away from you, the smile of sweetness still on his lips. 

The restaurant Jungkook picks after scrolling through Yelp and other lists of recommendations is a corner Italian place that apparently serves the best Linguini and clams—a dish that you really enjoy. So you put something together much more presentable than your usual round of sweatpants and baggy t-shirts—replacing the sweatpants with black jeans and giving yourself a cream colored cropped sweater. It makes Jungkook’s eyes widen all the same. He’s clad in his usual black jeans and oversized coat that is perfect for the spring breeze. 

Since the restaurant is within walking distance of the hotel, you and Jungkook agree to chill off on the driving just enough to stretch your legs and actually have a walk for once—all while celebrating the final night of the road trip. 

“I was a little worried about this at first, to be honest with you,” You admit softly to Jungkook, long after the pair of you have been seated in a corner booth and have ordered your food. You’re circling the pasta noodles around your fork, and Jungkook is watching with a touch of amusement and adoration in his eyes. 

“Not gonna lie, so was I,” Jungkook returns back with an equally meek smile. 

You gape at him. “You invited me though!” 

“I did!” Jungkook exclaims with a laugh, looking down at his own order of food. “Me inviting you was honestly a spur of the moment thing. Me catching up to you, however, was me trying to be brave.” 

“You seemed pretty brave throughout most the trip,” You point out 

Jungkook shakes his head, situating his arms in a cross motion. “Nah dude that was just all a very well thought out facade. A part of me was expecting it to go terribly so I could at least walk away knowing that I built you up in my mind and the fantasy of that was better than the reality.” He must see the look of uncertainty casting a shadow over your mind because he immediately cuts back in. “Just so you know, the reality is much better than anything I could have conjured up.” 

You lower your chin slightly, staring over at Jungkook. You bring one shoulder up into a half-hearted shrug, maybe to showcase a certain level of carelessness. “What were you conjuring up then?” 

“Oh, I don’t know if you want to go there right now,” He rebuffs, looking a little red in the cheeks. “I think we should start slow. Refer to the PG thoughts, if you will.” 

You laugh, focusing your gaze momentarily on the last of your pasta. You had sorted through the clams, since they weren’t your favorite things to eat. “Jungkook, are you admitting to me that you have thoughts above PG?” 

“Oh shit, that wasn’t my intention!” 

You giggle. “I’m messing with you, Jungkook!” 

He pouts. “Don’t do that.” He rests his hand on the table, palm up, inviting for you to take it. “I just want to spend today with you, and take it slow—I just want to hold your hand and kiss you and lay with you and just be with you in the way I couldn’t be with you in college. Is that too weird?” 

You look down, pressing your lips together, trying not to squeal and definitely not trying to throw yourself off the chair. You look back over at him and squeeze his hand. “That’s not too weird at all. That’s actually really sweet. Honestly, those are things I probably would have asked for regardless. I don’t really know the rules of dating—I never really went out that often.” 

Jungkook smiles sweetly back at you, he brings your hands up to kiss the back. “I’ll give you a few pointers then, let’s get going.” 

After the check is paid for—it ends up being a split between the two, it’s the best compromise you can come up with considering he wants to take you out but you want to pay him back for driving this far—the pair of you emerge back into the city space. Jungkook’s hand is still wrapped around yours, using that connection point to pull you close to him. 

“Now this move,” Jungkook explains, beginning to lead you both back to your hotel room. “Is when the gentleman walks the lady home, because their date went by smoothly and he wants to see her for as long as possible.” 

You laugh. “I’m enjoying this so far.” 

The pair of you continue down the sidewalk, using the time it’ll take to walk back to the hotel to walk off the food in your stomach. You resume your conversation, giggling and laughing all the same until you’re walking through the lobby of the hotel and slowly making your way to your hotel room. 

Right before you step inside, Jungkook stops you. “Normally, the front door is where the gentleman drops the lady off, and they talk about how well the date went.” 

“Oh, well, in that case, this was so nice, Jungkook,” You remark, beaming at Jungkook’s own smile. “I’m glad you convinced me to eat real food for once.” 

“You’re welcome—I had fun too.” Jungkook slides closer to you. You, completely hypnotized by his next movements, watch as he cups your face with his hand to angle you upwards. “This is the part where we have a first kiss, because the stars are lined up for this. And because I really want to.” 

You smile, curling one of your hands around the wrist near your face. “Seeing as we’ve already had our first kiss, how about a second one?” 

Jungkook smiles back, eyes lidded towards your mouth. “I guess that’ll work.” His lesson on dating, it seems, is done, as he leans in to kiss you. You suck in a breath as he covers your lips with his. It’s deeper than the first time he kissed you—which had been more of a peck with a side of morning breath. But now you’re both awake, tasting like wine, and drunk off each other. It’s a more real kiss. 

You whimper as Jungkook’s tongue runs over your bottom lip, before slipping into your mouth. It’s a sensation you can get completely lost in, until Jungkook pulls away. 

Under the hallway light, you can make out his flushed cheeks, his wet lips, his dark gaze. 

Immediately, Jungkook is pulling you to his side before he starts digging through the pockets of his jeans. “Alright, we’re going inside right now.” 

You lean into his shoulder. “I thought I was supposed to invite you inside, Jeon? What happened to giving me pointers on first dates?” 

“Screw that,” He retorts, practically shoving the hotel door open. He turns around to face you. “Now, this is our hotel room. And I want to kiss you in private.” 

Your laughter is drowned out as Jungkook tugs you by the wrist into the room. 

.

Under different circumstances, waking up next to each other after a first date would hit you with a wave of anxiety and maybe even a vague sense of embarrassment at letting someone you like see you in such a vulnerable position. 

Right now, however, under the morning sunlight within the covers of your shared hotel bed, you just feel happy and content. You wake up on your side, with an arm resting over Jungkook’s chest and his fingers curling around your own. There is an immediate feeling of giddiness that overtakes you, because it’s hard for you to believe that this is happening. Someone you’ve liked and continue to like actually returning your feelings? That has always been such a foreign concept to you. 

You don’t know how long you continue laying in bed until Jungkook starts shifting next to you, signalling his wake. You watch as his eyes slowly peel open, laced with grogginess but still looking unfairly attractive that there are butterflies in your stomach. 

Jungkook lets out a sigh, as he looks down at you. A tired smile takes over his expression. “Morning.” 

“Good morning,” You reply back, voice soft and a little shy. “Happy wedding day.” 

That is true. Today is Irene’s wedding—an event you and Jungkook will arrive at in nearly five hours. There’s a strange sort of knot that is beginning to twist itself in your stomach, a knowledge that something good is coming to a close but a fear in the unknown as to what this would mean regarding your relationship with Jungkook. Neither of you have laid down groundwork for your relationship—if this even is a relationship to begin with. You may be inexperienced with this kind of stuff, but you’re sure that one date and making out on a hotel bed doesn’t immediately constitute an exclusive relationship. 

If Jungkook notices the tension in your form, he doesn’t say anything. He kisses your temple and grumbles something about wanting to get the day started. He mentions something about not having to worry about getting dressed for the wedding straightaway—that he has reserved a room at the hotel some of the guests of the wedding would be staying at, which is where you will be getting ready before the event. You nod, hearing pieces of his words, but a lot of it gets lost in your own thoughts. 

Is it okay to ask questions about where you stand with Jungkook? Is it foolish of you to even bother wondering? You’ve seen movies and have had conversations with friends about guys who dismissed questions like that as ‘moving too fast’. You don’t want to scare Jungkook off, but you also need to know that you’re not wasting your time.

You remain in bed, staring up at the ceiling as you sigh and try to organize through your thoughts. You also try to break down how the past three days have been. 

However, trying to do so proves to be a difficult challenge, as Jungkook’s phone starts buzzing excessively on his side of the nightstand—it seems like he is getting a series of text messages from someone. 

You know you shouldn’t be looking or prying, but the constant binging of alerts only eats at your nerves more. You turn in the bed towards Jungkook’s side, picking up the device to search for the silence switch along the sides. The screen, however, lights up and you immediately see a name you have not seen or heard since college. 

Jennie (9:53AM): hey jungkook !! just thought I’d ask where you want to meet up before the wedding starts 

Jennie (9:53AM): since we’re each other’s plus ones, I think we should show up together but idk let me know what you think 

Jennie (9:53AM): I’m excited to see you again and catch up, it’s been so long !! :) 

You freeze, feeling your body overload with information and questions come flooding into your mind. At first, you think you reread the message wrong. You think that maybe Jennie is texting the wrong person. But after the third or fourth time, you realize that this isn’t a dream. That Jungkook already has a plus one to the wedding, and it isn’t you. 

More than that, it’s Jennie. 

Jennie is also someone you went to college with, and someone that you only heard of between the grape vines and therefore is someone that is only vaguely recognizable. But you definitely know her. Jennie had been one of Irene’s friends, president of her sorority—and labeled some of the nicest people on campus. Even just from rumors and the one time you ran into her around the school, you can see it. Jennie is nice, beautiful, friendly, and outgoing. All the things you are not. 

And now, she’s Jungkook’s plus one to the wedding. And Jungkook did not tell you. 

Your lips part as your head starts to spin. Why didn’t Jungkook tell you he already had a plus one to Irene’s wedding? Maybe he did not owe you the explanation, and maybe you should never have assumed he’d be your plus one to the wedding. 

The thought of you assuming Jungkook would be your date to the wedding fills you with a vague mortification—why did you have to go ahead and assume? 

Your mind starts to spiral as you fall into the depths of overthinking. Now you were set to attend a wedding alone, with no plus one, and surrounded by people you don’t know. All while watching Jungkook sit with Jennie, eat with Jennie, and dance with Jennie. 

Holy fuck, holy fuck, what were you going to do? You can’t go to this wedding alone. You can’t confront Jungkook about this—you’re not even supposed to be touching his phone or looking through his phone. He would definitely be upset. How could he not be? 

At once, the tears collect in your eyes. How could this be happening? Seconds ago, you had been so content and happy, excited to attend this wedding with Jungkook. Seconds ago, you had been confident about your feelings, and Jungkook’s feelings in return. From all the kisses he showered you in, the date, the talking, the confessing—how could you not feel that way? 

Had Jungkook just been pulling your leg? After all, he did have three years to talk to you, to go out with you. Why hadn’t he said something sooner? Is he here right now: talking to you and laughing with you because he hadn’t found anyone and knows that you would do anything for him? 

In the background, you can vaguely make out the shower in the bathroom turn off, signalling Jungkook’s near completion with the bathroom. At once, it feels like you’re in a car that has enforced sudden breaks and has sent you flying against the dashboard—like you can’t breathe. 

Hastily, you rest Jungkook’s phone back on the nightstand and roll back over to your side of the bed. You blink quickly, trying to rid of the tears that have collected in your eyes while also trying to calm the lump in the back of your throat. 

Just as you’re starting to get a handle back on your feelings, the bathroom door opens and you can vaguely make out Jungkook’s humming as he exits. The fact that he sounds so carefree while you’re hurting only a handful of feet away almost makes the tears come back in. But you’ve learned how to hide your emotions well. 

Jungkook’s soft laugh brings you out of your thoughts. “Still in bed?” He asks jokingly, sitting on the edge and placing a hand on your ankle. You try not to stiffen at the gesture. “You know, even though we’re getting dressed at a different hotel, we still need to get going.” 

You take in a breath. “I’m comfortable here,” You exclaim, sitting up and facing Jungkook. He’s looking as wide-eyed, easy-going, and comfortable as always. You’re not sure how long you can keep up the facade of being okay. “I was just waiting for you, that’s all.” 

You don’t wait for him to reply as you slide off the bed, grab your clothes from your suitcase, and lock yourself in the bathroom. You ignore the lump in your throat as you brush your teeth, as you get your day started. Finally, you look up at your own reflection in the mirror. Unlike previous times, when there had been a glimmer to your gaze—you don’t know you recognize the now disheartened individual before you. 

You exit the bathroom and immediately turn to pack up your suitcase once more, ignoring Jungkook in the process. The boy is on his phone, typing something—probably a text message. Maybe he’s responding to Jennie, confirming their date for tonight, as he remains completely oblivious to your feelings. 

The thought brings the tears back to your eyes. 

“Ready to go?” Jungkook asks, all smiles and soft eyes as he slides off the bed to face you. 

You don’t look at him as you shoulder your carry-on bag and straighten into a standing position. “Yeah.” You don’t mean for the tone to come out dry and unresponsive, but you’re too focused on trying to get the tears out of your throat. 

You miss the way the smile slowly slips off Jungkook’s face as he watches you move towards the door. 

Jungkook moves towards you, reaching forward to take your suitcase from you just as he’s done for the past few days. 

You, however, brush him off. “It’s okay, Jungkook.” You pull open the door and make your way down the hallway without looking back to see if he’s following closer behind you. You don’t need his help, you don’t need his pity. You don’t need him to do these things, to lead you on—especially if he was going to end up with some other girl at then end of the day. 

You stay quiet as you make your way to Jungkook’s car. Jungkook steals the occasional glance in your direction, seeming to finally realize that something is wrong. 

He, however, doesn’t say anything until you’re back on the freeway—on the five hour drive towards the wedding venue. “Everything okay?” 

You’re playing with your hair, but you stop long enough to spare him a short glance. You’re not even looking at his face, you’re looking at the chair he’s seated on. “What do you mean?” 

Jungkook clears his throat. “You’ve been really quiet since I got out of the bathroom. You…” He gestures to the center console. “You’re not even playing any music.” He tries for a smile. “I’d really like to listen to your ‘everything’ playlist.” 

“Sorry, I’m not really in a music-listening mood right now,” You whisper, realizing that you should probably cover up your ass a little better than you are currently. “S-Sorry, I think it was something at the restaurant yesterday. I’m not feeling super hot right now.” 

“Oh no, do we need to stop by a pharmacy or something? I can run in and get some stomach machine or whatever—!” 

“Jungkook, it’s fine.” 

Maybe it’s the finality of your tone, or the sharper edge in your voice, but Jungkook quiets down again. One glance in his direction shows you the furrow of his eyebrows, the set of his jawline—he looks hurt and confused. And that kills you inside. 

A small part of you wants you just lay all your cards on the table—to admit your side of the story and let him know about the texts and the hurt feeling still eating itself at your heart. 

But another part of you, the bigger part of you, doesn’t want to give Jungkook that power. You don’t want to be the one to crack first, to be the one who gets hurt first. So you refuse to say anything, settling deeper and deeper into the seat of Jungkook’s car. Contrary to your initial thoughts, he doesn’t plug in his own phone to play his own music. He simply allows the pair of you to bathe in silence. 

Without the music to distract you, without Jungkook trying to make conversation, it forces your mind to linger on the events of the early morning. Maybe Jungkook didn’t tell you because it was obvious to him that the pair of you would never have been a plus one to the wedding in general. He’s probably hurt because Jungkook can’t get his way with you. 

The realization that he doesn’t even have the consideration to warn you ahead of time that an invitation for a ride doesn’t equate to an invitation to be a plus one brings the tears back to your eyes. Did you not even deserve a warning? Why would Jungkook let you kiss him, let you fall in love with him—only to turn his back on you like this? 

You have to keep your eyes glued to the window of the passenger’s side of the car, just to make sure Jungkook won’t see the tears. You can just imagine that he’ll ask, and the conversation will steer the pair of you into an even more awkward space. 

It’s a very agonizing five hours. Not having that time to recover from the shock of those texts is becoming increasingly more difficult for you to handle. 

There are a few times that your tears overwhelm your whole system, where you have to sniff to get a handle on your body’s response to the emotions going through your body—which you’re sure Jungkook can hear. After all, there’s no music playing and there is a silence that is threatening to swallow you whole. 

Jungkook, however, does not say anything in response to your very obvious sniffle. He merely tightens his grip on the steering wheel, and keeps his mouth shut. You wonder if he’s waiting for you to talk first, to explain what’s going on with you. 

The sky is bleeding orange by the time Jungkook pulls into the new hotel, the final hotel. There is still two hours until the wedding is set to start, but every nerve in your body is screaming for you to leave and go back home. Every nerve in your body is telling you that you don’t belong here anymore. 

“Okay, I let you have your peace for the whole drive over,” Jungkook starts off, voice tight, fixing the car into park. “But I’m asking you this right now. Are you sure you’re okay? You don’t seem fine… and I’m worried about you…” He reaches across the car to land a hand on your shoulder. It’s a completely normal gesture, especially between you and Jungkook, but you cannot handle it. 

You jerk away. “I’m fine,” You snap out, actually fixing your gaze on him this time. Jungkook recoils, immediately retracting his arm from you, looking like you just burned him. You tear your gaze away from him. You’re not strong enough to see him hurt because of you. “Why do you care anyways?” 

Jungkook exhales in disbelief, turning towards the steering wheel of the car and running a hand through his hair. “What are you talking about? Is this about last night? Did I… say something to scare you off?” 

“This isn’t about what you said, this is about what you didn’t say and what you’re not telling me!” 

Jungkook looks like you just grew a second head. “What are you talking about?” 

You whirl back to face him. “Oh, so the fact that you and Miss. Jennie were already set to go to this fucking wedding together and you didn’t even think to give me a heads up and tell me?” 

Jungkook freezes like a deer in headlights. “What? How did you know about that?” 

You laugh, but it’s a hollow noise that only makes that lump come back to your throat. “Nevermind,” You bite out. This time, you don’t stop the tears from resurfacing as you give Jungkook a full look this time. His demeanor changes from frozen to pained at the sight. “I hope you guys are very happy together.” 

You don’t say another word as you fumble with the latch of the door before pushing it open with more strength than necessary. You can vaguely hear Jungkook struggling with his own seat belt, but you don’t care. You slam the car door shut and storm away. You don’t know where you’re going—maybe around the corner to scream, or to call a taxi that’ll take you to the airport. You don’t care about the wedding. You don’t think you could face the embarrassment in facing Jungkook or Jennie or Irene right now. 

“Shit, Y/N! Y/N!” Jungkook is calling for you now, his footsteps loud against the asphalt. 

Everything feels like you’re going through water, which is probably why Jungkook is able to reach you as quickly as he does. He catches you by the wrist. 

“Y/N—please, will you stop and just listen to me?” 

“No! Jungkook, let me go.” You start trying to tug your wrist, trying to pull yourself away from him. “Let me go! I’m leaving! I don’t want to see you anymore!” You’re gasping, the tears blurring your vision and making you feel powerless. 

Without a warning, Jungkook pulls you in his arms. Wrapping his arms around you, he traps you in his embrace. And you are miserable. 

“Stop it!” You gasp, trying to push him away. You’re heaving—crying and trying to escape from someone as strong as Jungkook is definitely a workout for your body. “Jungkook, leave me alone. This is all my fault.” 

He pauses. “What do you mean?” 

You stop struggling, allowing Jungkook to hold you as you pull back enough to look away from his face. You wipe at the tears on your face. “It’s my fault anyways. I said I liked you and you said you liked me too, but maybe that wasn’t enough for you. Just because we like each other doesn’t mean we’re exclusive. I should have asked up front, so I wouldn’t get hurt in the long run.” 

“You don’t need to get hurt though,” Jungkook whispers kindly, his voice overcoming the blood in your ears, as well as your own yelling. You quiet down at that, except for your own lungs contracting to catch more air. This leaves you a hiccuping mess. He waits until he knows you’re not going to say anything next. “You’re right, okay? Jennie and I were supposed to be each other’s dates.” 

You’re still trying to catch your breath. 

Jungkook rests a hand on top of your head, curling his fingers through the strands of your hair soothingly. “Are you okay?” 

You hiccup. “Why are you telling me this? I just told you that I’m hurt right now…” 

“Shhh.” Jungkook pulls back and cups your face in his hands so you can look at him. “You aren’t listening to me. I said we were supposed to be each other’s dates. We’re not anymore.” 

You blink, allowing the tears that were already filling your eyes to fall down your cheeks. Jungkook wipes them gently with his thumb. “What?” 

Jungkook’s gaze flickers between your eyes. “Jennie and I are friends, so we’d figure it would be fun to just go together and have a person to sit with, eat with, and dance with. As friends.” 

“W-What happened then?” You ask, a watery color in your voice. 

Jungkook gives you a gentle smile, the kind of gesture that tells you that you should know the answer already. “You happened, silly.” He keeps his eyes on yours. “I saw you at the party with Jimin and invited you to come with me. I assumed when I asked that we’d be each other’s plus ones. I forgot to tell Jennie though when I asked you out.” He tilts his head at you. “You saw the texts on my phone, didn’t you?”

“I-I’m sorry.” You hiccup again. “Your phone kept going off this morning and I was just trying to put it on silent. I-I didn’t mean to look through your messages…” 

“Shh, baby, you’re good, you’re okay.” Jungkook interrupts gently, wrapping his arms tighter around you and swaying the pair of you back and forth. The usage of the nickname fills you with a new feeling, a warmer feeling. It helps calm you down. 

Your breathing eventually evens out, bringing you back to reality and to the realization that you and Jungkook are hugging in the middle of a hotel parking lot. 

Jungkook loosens his grip on you, letting you step back. He watches you for a moment. “Here,” He says, digging through his pocket and pulling out his phone. “I think you should see this.” He clicks through a few of his apps, until he seems to find what he’s looking for because he hands the phone to you. You look over at him, confusion flooding through your features. Jungkook gives you a reassuring nod. “It’s okay.” 

Still hesitant, you take the phone and look at the messages across the screen. It’s the texts from this morning. 

Jennie (9:53AM): hey jungkook !! just thought I’d ask where you want to meet up before the wedding starts 

Jennie (9:53AM): since we’re each other’s plus ones, I think we should show up together but idk let me know what you think 

Jennie (9:53AM): I’m excited to see you again and catch up, it’s been so long !! :) 

Jungkook (10:20AM): hey Jennie !! oh shit i totally forgot to let u know but i actually found a plus one :( i’m soooo sorry i should have told you earlier omg i feel terrible 

Jennie (10:20AM): no worries jungkook !! who is it omg do I know them? 

Jungkook (10:20AM): it’s actually Y/N? We all went to college together… 

Jennie (10:20AM): OH!!!! wait isn’t she the one Irene was working with a lot for senior projects? 

Jennie (10:20AM): OH HOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO

Jennie (10:21AM): OKAY JUNGKOOK I SEE U 

Jennie (10:21AM): she’s THE Y/N right???? the one u were in love with for our entire college career?? 

Jungkook (10:22AM): …… maybe? 

Jennie (10:22AM): WOWOWOWOW good for u Jungkook !!! glad to see u finally having the balls to ask her out !! 

Jungkook (10:22AM): OKAY THAT’S ENOUGH 

Jungkook (10:23AM): I actually felt BAD for leaving you by yourself BUT NOT ANYMORE 

Jennie (10:23AM): LMAO Jungkook I’m friends with Irene’s entire bridesmaid row i’ll be fine 

Jennie (10:23AM): just go get ur dick wet!!!!!! 

Jungkook (10:23AM): istg i will leave you on read 

Jungkook (10:23AM): also that is NOT the point!!!!!! Just wanna love my new girl :( 

Jennie (10:24AM): You’re gross 

Jennie (10:24AM): but sounds good see you tonight! 

You look up from Jungkook’s phone to see him watching you carefully, gauging your reaction, pleading for you to forgive him. 

The only thought that can be translated into a coherent sentence comes out: “You were in love with me during college?” 

Jungkook exhales in a laugh, his arms finding your waist once again. “I think ‘in love with’ was a bit of a stretch back then. I think you could agree that we didn’t know each other well enough before for me to say that.” 

You’re still looking at him. “Back then…?” You echo. 

He nods. “Back then.” He brings you closer, one hand moving up to gently brush at the skin of your cheek. “But it’s different now. Now, I can say with absolute certainty that I’m in love with you.” 

Your lips part. “You’re in love with me?” The tears spring back into your eyes, but for a different reason entirely. The emotional rollercoaster you have just been on is unbelievable. 

Jungkook’s eyes widen at the sight of your tears. “Oh shit, I’m sorry! Is that too fast? I’m sorry, I should have given you a warning or something. Or more time at least. Oh no, please don’t cry…” 

You brush him off with a watery laugh, waving his concern away. “It’s okay Jungkook. This is fine, really.” You give him a smile. “I love you too. I really thought you were pulling my leg or something.” 

Jungkook gives you his own small smile. “I’m sorry. I should have brought this up sooner about us being each other’s plus ones. Just because I assume something doesn’t mean it’s an established thing.” He brings you closer, his smile turning into a grin. “You love me too, huh?” 

You giggle. You’re too strung out to come up with something witty or clever. “Yeah…” 

Jungkook is still smiling, his gaze switching between your lips and your eyes. “I’m gonna kiss you now.” 

You nod. “About time.” 

He kisses you again, softly and sweetly, tongue slipping past the seam of your lips but it’s gentle caresses that make your heart feel like it’s crawling up your throat. 

“OH MY GOD GET A ROOM!” A voice calls from the other side of the parking lot, forcing you and Jungkook to pull away. The pair of you look at each other and you start to laugh. 

Jungkook kisses your forehead, sweeping down to your ear. “How about we check into our room and get ready?” 

You giggle, nodding over at him. “That sounds good.” 

So Jungkook leads the way, wrapping an arm around your shoulder as you gather your suitcases from the car and enter the lobby. You check in easily, as Jungkook is provided a map with directions on how to reach the room. 

The pair of you don’t pull away once until Jungkook is sliding the key card into the door and pushing it open to reveal the bedroom you’ll be sharing for the night. 

Both you and Jungkook park your suitcases near the foot of the bed, as per usual. 

“Do you want to use the bathroom?” Jungkook offers. 

You nod, smiling softly. “Okay.” 

You gather the dress you’ve brought in your arms, about to enter the bathroom, before Jungkook’s voice stops you. “Hey,” He calls, approaching you and wrapping you in his arms again. He’s much more handsey this time, like he needs to make sure you’re not going to run away again, like you’re going to be okay. “You feel better now?” His thumb brushes your lips. “Your eyes are still a little red.” 

You nod. “The makeup will probably help that,” You reassure in a soft voice. 

Jungkook mirrors your movements. “Still, how about I get some ice for you so you can put something cold underneath your eyes… to stop the puffing.” 

He looks genuinely concerned and worried for your wellbeing that you can’t help but smile. Since he is insisting, you decide to just let him be. “Okay, Jungkook.” 

He smiles. “Okay! You start getting ready and I’ll get the ice, okay?” A quick kiss on your cheek before he’s bounding out of the door with the provided ice buckets. 

Your eyes linger on the door for a few minutes before you’re turning back to your suitcase. The dress you have picked is a pink flowing floor-length number—something Karly helped you pick out before leaving. It’s soft enough that it doesn’t leave crease marks along the fabric, which had made this outfit perfect for the trip. You take the dress and your bag of makeup before entering the bathroom. You’re just slipping on the dress when you hear the hotel room door open and close. 

“Okay, I got the ice!” Jungkook announces through the bathroom door. “Did you want to work on your eyes right now?” 

“Sure,” You call back. “Do you mind zipping me up first?” 

“Of course,” Jungkook returns, sounding distracting as you open the door to the bathroom. You peek your head through, noticing Jungkook opening his suitcase on the floor and sorting through it—probably for his own suit. 

He must hear the door open, because he looks up towards you. Immediately, his eyes widen as he straightens up into a standing position. “O-Oh wow…” He’s looking you over up and down, up and down, as if he needs to commit this to memory. “Y-You look great. Beautiful.” 

“Really?” You stammer back. “Thank you.” 

Jungkook keeps his eyes on you as he approaches you. “You needed me to zip you up?” 

“O-Oh right, yeah.” Hastily, you turn around, brushing the hair from your back to expose your undone zipper, and your bare back. 

You think that he purposely grazes the tips of his fingers against your skin in his process of bringing the zipper up to the top of the fabric. You’re about to turn, thank him, but his hands back at your waist do the gesture for you. “Thank you.” 

“You’re welcome. You look really pretty.” 

You pout. “You’re being too nice to me.” 

Jungkook whines, hugging you close to him. “You’re too cute.” He noses at your temple. “I just wanted to see you smile.” He pulls away after a moment. “Let’s take care of your face, yeah?” He turns around and returns with a small baggy full of ice. “Here, sit down for a second.” He leaves for a second, returning back with a towel. “Maybe… five minutes each eye. I don’t know. I’ll get ready while we’re waiting.” 

So he takes his suit out from his case and disappears into the bathroom, leaving you alone with a towel of ice pressed against your eye. The cooling sensation definitely helps with the puffiness. 

Jungkook appears from the bathroom a few minutes later—dressed in a black suit with a white button-down and a long skinny black tie. His hair has been fiddled with a little, but he still has that messy, boyish, lovable appearance that makes your heart race. 

“Did you switch the towel?” 

You nod. 

“How do you feel?” 

Slowly, you bring the towel down and rest it on your lap. You look at Jungkook. “How do I look?” 

He leans forward towards you, holding your chin gently between his fingers. “You look better. Did you need to finish getting ready?” 

“Yeah. I just need to touch up my makeup.” 

“Okay, go ahead then.” 

Jungkook takes the towel, and watches as you make your way back to the bathroom. You’re only gone for a few minutes before you’re emerging once more—eyeshadow a little darker, lashes a little closer, and lips slightly pinker, but overall still looking like the same version of the girl he fell in love with. 

The pair of you drive to the wedding venue, a cute brick building with browns, greens, and whites surrounding. Guests already swarm the outside area, some of whom you recognize from college. The sight makes you nervous. 

Jungkook sees this, and he reaches over to grab onto your hand. “You can just stick with me, okay?” He smiles. “I’ll protect you.” 

You roll your eyes, but you are thankful to have Jungkook as your source of comfort and be that person you could run back to. 

He parks and meets you at the front of his car, where you lace fingers and make your way towards the venue. You go through a small round of hellos and ‘nice to finally meet you’ conversations—most notably from Mingyu and Jennie, both of whom light up at the sight of your presence. Contrary to your previous worries, you find that you don’t really need to be so nervous. Mingyu and Jennie are friends of Jungkook’s for a reason—they radiate a relaxing nature that you can tell is what has drawn the three of them to each other. 

They ask about you, your college experience, your current experience, passing easy conversation in the ceremony space right before the start of the wedding. It’s fun to see Jungkook joking around with the friends he grew up with, and even more fun to see how easy you are allowed into that world. 

The actual wedding ceremony is a blur. You vaguely recognize the extremely attractive, excited, and watery-eyed version of Seokjin at the head of the aisle. You definitely recognize the equally as attractive, excited, and watery-eyed version of Irene, downed in white lace and looking much more beautiful than you ever remember her. Vows are exchanged, kisses are shared, there’s an applause, and pictures are taken before the guests are ushered into the main entry room—decked out with a bar and a few scattered seating areas. Jungkook whispers to you that guests are put here temporarily, as the ceremony space is being converted into a dining area. 

True to Jungkook’s promise, he lingers by your side most of the night. Although you reassure him that you are fine, you are much more emotionally stable compared to a few hours ago, and that perhaps you are okay catching up with Nayeon—another girl from college, actually someone from the first party you ever attended who defended you when you were receiving unwanted attention—but Jungkook simply tells you that he likes being around you. He likes being able to put his arm around you, likes to rest his hand at your waist, likes people knowing that he has you. 

It’s a few more minutes of conversation, of laughter, of old stories being exchanged between people you haven’t seen for years, when the guests are called back into the newly converted dining area. Instead of rows of chairs lined up, there are round tables filling the space. The long panel of doors once closed along the wall of the room have been opened—exposing a gazebo with a D.J. and a dance floor, all encircled by a string of big bright fairy lights. 

You and Jungkook are situated at the same table as most of the guests you recognize from college. You assume this is purposefully done to give you all a common ground, and it works because conversations spring easily between you all. Even when you’re not talking about your experiences from university, you’re able to transition from topic to topic. You and Jungkook occasionally talk amongst yourselves as you’re eating, but you sit together and laugh together when Irene and Seokjin emerge and listen in during the wedding toasts. 

Finally, Irene and Seokjin make their rounds through the room, stopping at the tables to cheer and laugh and exchange a few words of congratulations and conversation. Following this process, everyone at your table stands on their feet as Irene and Seokjin make their way towards you. There are bright smiles, Irene’s cheerful gasp as she takes in all the guests that have come to join her. She circles your table, hugging every guest, continuing this when she reaches you. 

Irene grins at the sight of you. “Y/N! Oh my gosh, it’s been so long!” 

“I know!” You return, pulling away from Irene. “Congratulations. This wedding is beautiful.” 

She beams, absolutely radiating in her white dress and glittering makeup. “Thank you so much for coming! But oh my god, are the rumors true, did you really show up—!” She looks over your shoulder, and grins again. “Jungkook!” She hugs Jungkook. “I should be saying congratulations to the two of you. I was surprised to get the text from Jungkook saying that you guys were coming as each other’s dates. Gave me a whole pain because I had to switch some seats around at the last minute. But anything for my favorite people.” She turns to you and holds onto your arms. “Jungkook has had a crush on you for years, so you’re really doing him a huge favor.” 

“Okay, enough,” Jungkook interrupts, scowling. But there is still that playful look in his eyes. “Did all your friends know about this? Jennie knew something was up too when I texted her.” 

Irene presses her lips together. “Mingyu might have mentioned something.” She presses her hand to Jungkook’s cheek. “Stay safe, you guys. Hope you enjoy the rest of the night.” She moves onto her next guest. 

Jungkook is groaning. “Remind me to never tell Mingyu anything ever again.” He glares at the boy from across the table. “Gonna fling some peanuts at that son of a bitch.” 

You laugh, wrapping your arms around Jungkook’s waist. “Oh, let him be. It’s Irene’s wedding. You can get him tomorrow.” 

Jungkook pouts, but he does wrap his own arm around your shoulder. “Ah, love my girl—promoting evil behavior after festive events.” He kisses your cheek as your table takes their seats once more. 

The good natured atmosphere continues as you and Jungkook down your food, remaining fully engaged in the conversations happening around the table. After another hour of this, the DJ announces the start of the married couple’s first dance. Irene and Seokjin take to the dance floor and spin around, her white dress flowing around the room like light. Underneath the glow of the fairy lights, it looks like the couple is in an entirely new world. And you are so taken by it. 

Jungkook does not turn to you until the DJ plays a slow song—a first slow song after a series of upbeat dance and pop genres. He jerks his head towards the dance floor. “You want to dance?” 

You take his hand when he offers. “Of course.” He leads you across the room, towards the gazebo, where several other couples have moved to cling to one another. Jungkook pulls you in: one hand on your waist and the other with your own hand. “This is really nice,” You start off. 

Jungkook laughs. “The wedding, or the dance?” 

You smile over at him. “Both. Being able to slow dance with you, however, is marginally better.” 

Jungkook is quiet for a little after that. He seems content just staring at your eyes, taking in the magic of this moment. “Thank you for coming with me,” He starts. “The whole road trip thing. Definitely would not have been as fun if I did all that by myself.” 

“Well, thank you for inviting me,” You return. “Even though we had that big misunderstanding. I had a lot of fun.” 

“Hey.” Jungkook angles his head a little so he can look at you in the eyes. “You know that I would never hurt you, right? You’re too important to me that I wouldn’t even think to pull some stupid shit like that again. You know that I love you too much to do that to you, right?” 

“I do know now,” You say, gazing over at him. “And I love you too.” 

You’re not usually an expressive person. But it’s worth saying those words just to see the grin that overtakes Jungkook’s face. It’s worth even more when he leans forward, kissing you openly in front of all his friends, nibbling gently at your bottom lip, running his tongue over the wound, and into your mouth. It’s worth it to have his fingers dusting sweetly over your skin, coaxing your mouth to open to allow exploration. 

It feels like worlds pass before Jungkook pulls away, giving you that breathless smile dimple and all, before he’s leaning forward to bury his face into your neck. 

“I think the drive home will be fun,” Jungkook mutters softly. 

“Hm?” You hum, eyes closed as he presses tiny kisses along your neck. 

“Most definitely,” Jungkook says, lifting himself just enough so that his lips hover over your ear lobe. “Because I plan on fucking you in every hotel bed for the rest of the trip.” 

You feel your heart race, your cheeks heat. Yes, this was definitely worth it. 

[cienie-isengardu]

Lin Kuei: Art

RELIGION <> ORIGINS / ARCHITECTURE <> FOOD <> FOR THE LIN KUEI <> ART <> CRYOMANCERS <> LIN KUEI SOCIETY <> MONEY & MATERIAL GOODS

The continuation of the morgianesffs-blog’s list of questions about Lin Kuei. For the formalities, the original questions:

What do you think the Lin Kuei's view on artistic culture (probably not the right word) is? I know they are heavily militaristic,  but in the game,  Kuai Liang offers Hanzo tea and he properly prepares it the Japanese way, that says they have something of an education other than just related to fighting?

In contrast to religion as a belief in gods that Lin Kuei seems to constantly reject for ages, I think broadly understood art plays a more vital role in their culture. 

Sadly, there is little direct source material in that regard - named Lin Kuei warriors rarely let themselves “waste time” to straightway talk about beauty of handmade artifacts or poems or music or other stuff fitting the definition of art. But as history proves time after time, art is an inseparable part of human existence and militaristic societies aren’t different in that regard from the peaceful ones. As far as games and some old material sources  are concerned, Lin Kuei isn’t exception. Their aesthetics, symbolism and emotional value hidden between may not be eligible to outsiders but the amount of beautiful yet with no practical role decorations seen outside and inside Temple or well-crafted weapons and armors strongly suggest that Lin Kuei respected craft.

Frankly, martial arts and art (music, calligraphy, armorsmith, weaponsmith) have this in common: to achieve a satisfactory level of mastery, talent alone is not enough. Both require discipline, years of training and striving for perfection. What fits well into Lin Kue philosophy. 

Mortal Kombat novel (1995) stated:

[Lin Kuei] would kidnap children when they were five or six and raise them in secret caves or woods to become superb athletes, great scholars, and unparalleled fighters, able to use all weapons and to improvise arms from common objects such as paper rolled to a knife-point or sand packed into a sock. They would train the children, boys and girls both, to be masters of many trades: carpenters, fishermen, priests, and even beggars, so they could blend in and make themselves useful in different towns as they traveled on missions for their lords.

This passage strongly implies comprehensive education, also in professions requiring creative/manual abilities (carpenters) or specific knowledge that may include familiarity of (religious?) art and philosophy. There is no way to tell how the education of adepts looks in modern time, but considering how well versed the warriors are in technology (C.I. project) chemistry (Cyrax’s bombs), anatomy (all brutalities & fatalities) or language (in Alternative Timeline English is not the native language of any(?) named Lin Kuei) we can assume it still covers a wide range of specializations. Making (practicing) art is related to creativity and manual skills, so it could be part of said education. 

Another important role that art most likely plays is building and maintaining the common identity of Lin Kuei warriors. Because of that the interior of the Temple is decorated with a clan sign,

which also appears on their armor and weapons and even tattooed on their body (at least in MK Conquest TV series)

and, like was shown in Mortal Kombat Legends: Battle of Realms, the main(?) hall is decorated with statues of warriors. One looks like Sub-Zero,

although I doubt that it is a sculpture created in honor of the fallen Bi-Han. Unless it was created so quickly, I think it could be images of the clan's founders, or images of historically important warriors, or even an anthropomorphic representation of the elements (like ice) on which the clan's power was built.

Even if the warriors themselves were not involved in crafts, the Lin Kuei had skilled craftsmen equipping them with the necessary items.

There is also an aspect of sheer aesthetics that brings psychological comfort. Something that was definitely useful to warriors who lived under a lot of pressure. The beauty of rich ornaments and spacious architecture create a safe space to meditate or relax after difficult missions or close-to-death experiences. Likewise, art could be a safe (or at least safer) way to express themselves or deal with emotional trauma, in otherwise very strict society that can not stand weakness.

Interestingly, in additional sources like game cosmetics or win poses, Kuai Liang shows creative tendencies. For examples, his ice clones have various shapes even though there is no practical use of them in win pose:

Then we have the variety of his arsenal. As a cryomancer, Kuai Liang depends mainly on his ice power to create weapons. He can use anything at hand, freeze it solid and smash, slash or stab the opponent. To kill or injure an enemy, Sub-Zero does not need a sophisticated tool yet many of his MK11!axes have additional ornaments or more defined shape than it is really necessary:

All of the mentioned examples and the not discussed detailed ornaments on Sub Zero’s armors or even his style of speech (that may be influenced by some literature considering Jacqui’s accusation of “borrowing that line”) strongly suggests to me that Lin Kuei in general appreciates broadly understood art, especially the handicraft such as armorsmith or weaponsmith. This may also be one of factors why some warriors like Kuai Liang look down on technology and especially guns, a weapon mass produced and with no finesse.

As for the tea ceremony, by no means I’m familiar enough with Asian culture to say it for sure, but it didn’t look like Japanese brewing style to me. That and I highly doubt Kuai Liang would dare to do so in front of hot-headed, distrusting Hanzo who could easily read that gesture as Lin Kuei once again mocking him and his clan. Knowing how Sub-Zero wanted to make peace, I don’t think he would have taken such a careless step. Beside that observation, it is another example how well-versed and educated Kuai Liang is, even in matters that don’t have any military use.

In summary, I personally believe that art plays a vital role in Lin Kuei society. It helps in creating and unifying their warrior identity and pride in long-lived clan traditions, brings emotional comfort when needed and gives a way to express themselves (the fighter’s individuality) in safer, subtler ways. Even if warriors don’t craft weapons or armors themselves, there are specialized groups of people who provide them with the best quality craftsmanship. Because of course Lin Kuei demands and respect the perfection.

[battlinghurricanes]

LITYERSES HEADCANONS!!!!!!!

I saw some other headcanon posts for him, so I felt inspired to throw my own ideas out there! I think some of my headcanons are pretty different from the ones a lot of people have of him, but I always like reading other people’s ideas so hopefully people will like this too!

(also theres a lot, this is long *cough* my bad)

- After the incident in The Lost Hero, after Midas dies, Lityerses is homeless. His father’s mansion is destroyed and it’s not like he has anyone to turn to.

- They mention in The Lost Hero that the Hunters of Artemis came across Midas and Lityerses earlier. When they did, Lityerses heard in passing about Camp Half-Blood. It’s the only place meant for demigods that he has even the slightest knowledge on, so he sets his sights on making it there.

- It takes eight grim months to reach New York. It’s half a miracle, slowly taking busses, hitchhiking, and sometimes just walking to the next city. Monsters attack him the entire way and he adds plenty of new scars to his collection.

- There’s no reliable way for him to get money. He gets much, much better at using his powers as a son of Demeter. He uses it to grow fruits, vegetables, and any sort of edible plant so he can at least have food of some kind.

- He goes to New York City because he doesn’t know what else to do. He doesn’t even know if the Hunters were talking about the city or the state but he figures he has to start somewhere. Unfortunately, the Triumvirate notices his presence before anyone from Camp Half-Blood does.

- He follows some demigods to Nero, who sent them to collect him. He offers a position working for the Triumvirate in exchange for food, lodging, and other basic support. Lityerses is tired and he wants to sleep in a bed and have proper meals he doesn’t have to worry about acquiring.

- He accepts, not caring if what the Triumvirate is doing is shitty or not. Nero sends him to Indianapolis to work for Commodus.

- Apollo’s decision to give him another chance was very affecting. Especially coming from ancient times when the stories of the gods on earth were far more real and immediate, he knows very well how the gods could treat mortals as simply disposable.

- He had never questioned his belief that any mortal who got wrapped up in business with a god suffered a horrible fate because of it, whether the god intended it or not.

- But then Apollo saved his life and defended him at the Waystation and told him he trusted him and Lityerses’s mind keeps drifting back to him over and over and over.

- His mind wants to reconcile what Apollo did for him with what he knows about the gods. He can’t, and that makes him feel a great many things that he can’t pin down. Apollo decided to care about him when he had no reason to, and he doesn’t know what that means for him.

- He feels a twinge of gratitude whenever he steps into the sunlight and pulse of anxiety whenever he wonders if he’s okay on his quest.

- He thinks about Meg, his little sister, and hopes they’re keeping each other safe.

- Lityerses can occasionally seem really dull, indifferent, or unresponsive because he gives super minimal reactions to things sometimes, but that’s really not the case.

- Being in the modern world for him is sort of like a slight, but near constant sensory overload. Sometimes, his brain is too busy processing other stuff to fully load up an emotional response. He’ll react to something in his mind but he won’t express it outwardly at all.

- Leo, running up: Wanna help me strap a firework to a crossbow bolt and try to shoot it into the office building across the street to see if it’ll blow up in there?!!!!!     Lityerses, with a completely flat voice and blank expression: I think that’s a very bad idea.

- It’s definitely not all the time, but it does happen.

- (Me? Projecting sensory issues onto every character I like? It’s more likely than you think.)

- He has a very “go with the flow” attitude, to the point of being a character flaw sometimes. It can make him easy to manipulate.

- (Commodus: hey lityerses go put this barbed wire and war helmets and metal teeth on these ostriches     Liyerses, in his head: uhuh uhuh uhuh uhuh yeah cool got it i hope i still have some fingers left tomorrow)

- He’s working on it though. He’s working on it.

- One side effect of this is that whenever Leo makes some pop culture or meme reference, Lityerses will just nod and agree. It takes Leo forever to realise that he was just lying going along with it.

- *mid conversation*  Lityerses: I’d go get some food, but I don’t have any money     Leo: dude, you’re literally just the 69 cents vine, not enough for chicken nuggets     Lityerses: oh, for sure     Calypso, overhearing: wait, you understood that??     Lityerses: no, I’ve never understood a single word that’s left leo’s mouth       Leo: what?!!!! but you said you understood my reference to that dril tweet the other day, right?!      Lityerses: yeah, of course      Calypso: what’s a dril tweet??      Lityerses: I don’t know.       Leo: YOU TRAITOR

- Another side effect: he’s a complete pushover for Georgie.

- At one point, when some of the Waystation crew are walking out in the city, she complains that she’s tired and wants to be carried. When her moms gently refuse, she immediately goes over to Lityerses and holds her arms out and says that she’s tired. He doesn’t even stop walking, he just swoops her up and puts her on his shoulder right away.

- Hemithia and Jo glare at him but he just avoids eye contact. “She’s already up there, too much effort to put her down now.”

- He was in the Fields of Punishment in the Underworld and wow was it incredibly traumatizing.

- His memories of death are sickeningly agonizing, but they also usually feel distant and unreal. Sometimes, though, they’ll worm their way into his dreams with horrific clarity. He’ll wake up in a cold sweat, hyperventilating, with full body tremors he can’t control.

- One morning after waking up like that, while sitting on the floor regaining his composure, Hemithea comes in to see why he wasn’t up yet. He pulls himself together in due time. He doesn’t answer any of her questions.

- He never talks about it, but he’s truly terrified of dying. He never was before, but now that he knows what’s waiting for him...

- It doesn’t help that he knows that, no matter how careful he is or how well he defends himself, he could die at any moment if Thanatos decides to bring him back to the Underworld.

- It weighs on the back of his mind that, at least on a technical level, he has no right to be alive. Sometimes he can’t help but think that the things he does now don’t matter in the end, because there’s no reason he would get a second judgement when he does eventually return to the Underworld.

- He does his best to shut that down and remind himself that trying to do the right thing helps the people around him, no matter what happens after his death, but the thought exists and it is painful.

- He really never voices these fears because he feels like all he can really do is try not to think about it, and when he does, he tries to forget as soon as he can. It’s a burden he shoulders as quietly as he can.

- He isn’t used to owning a lot of material possessions, both from how he lived in ancient times and then from being homeless for a while. He’s only ever described wearing that Cornhuskers shirt because it’s the only one he owned for a while.

- Not long after joining the Waystation, the first time he was going out somewhere them, Jo snapped that it just made him look stupid, trying to look tough by going without a coat when it was so cold outside. Earnestly confused and defensive, he tells her that he just doesn’t own one.

- After that, she insists on filling his wardrobe until he has enough clothes.

- (Speaking of the Cornhuskers shirt, he just picked it out on a whim, sort of thinking of Demeter (They grow corn here like we used to grow wheat, right?) and sort of just thinking it looked cool. Olujime once tried to talk to him about how some college teams were doing and Lityerses just goes “What’s football?”)

- He doesn’t really get modern fashion trends. Leo offers to catch him up, but he declines very quickly.

- In ancient times, dyes and patterns available for clothes were much more limited and much more expensive. He’s fascinated by all the colors and prints people can wear just all the time now. Lityerses wears a lot of bright colors because he thinks they’re cool and fun. He likes red, blue, and purple the most but he’ll wear a lot of stuff.

- Along with not really following any trends, he also hasn’t picked up on a lot of unspoken gender connotations that come with modern clothing.

- When the Waystation are first trying to get him some clothes, he picks out a pink jacket and Leo snorts at him like “You’re going for pink?” Lityerses just stares at him like “Yeah. It’s just pink.” Leo sort of realizes and goes, “Oh, it’s just, you know...” to Calypso. But Calypso is also just staring blankly and says, “No I don’t. I don’t get it. Is there something about pink?” And Leo notices Hemithea glaring daggers at him and he laughs nervously and goes, “Nevermind, it was a stupid joke anyway.”

- Hemithia: Leave the ancient demigod and ex-titan blissfully unaware of our complex, modern gender stereotypes.    Leo, sweating: gotcha.

- He pretty much just wears what he finds comfortable. Generally it’s just t-shirts with jeans or basketball shorts.

- Lityerses is a super clingy sleeper and will reflexively grab on to anything within arms reach while he’s asleep. (He’s a big spoon by nature.)

- Leo discovers this and now, whenever Lityerses falls asleep on one of the couches, he’ll entertain himself by slowly pushing a pillow up to him until he inevitably grabs it and pulls it against his chest.

- No one gets those pillows back until Lityerses wakes up.

- He’s very buff. His muscles aren’t super defined, nothing at all like a bodybuilder, no six pack abs or anything. But he’s built. Thick arms.

- He’s very limber and flexible too. He has great balance, which lets him move as fast as he does in combat. He’s quite physically fit in general.

- He’ll never admit it, but he ended up getting attached to the highlights in his hair he got when Apollo revealed his godly form. He thought they were fun and different and he sort of missed it when his hair grew out.

[fanfalc-616]

Time For Amnesia

Chapter Nine: Ice, Electricity, And Painful Injuries

(Previous Chapter Here)

Uhhh ok so I was working on the new chapter and I realized I never even posted chapter nine (on tumblr anyway it’s on ao3-). But uh yeah here it is,,, I’ll post ten (which I finally completed!!) tomorrow.

Also yes this is my new format for all fanfics hsjshdh

Eventually, Nya comes in, looking concerned.

“It’s getting late.” She notes, choosing not to comment on however she feels about how he’s been acting.

Kai nods. “Where am I sleeping?” A sudden thought strikes him. “I- I don’t sleep with… them, do I?”

Nya seems uncomfortable. “We agreed that that would be a bad idea, and before you got together, you used to stay in a different room- the room you woke up in. And-“

“Alright, I’ll just go there and go to bed.” Kai gets up from his spot on the floor.

After pausing for a moment, Nya nods. “Do you need me to show you where it is, or-“

He shakes his head. “I remember.” Without waiting for a response, he heads off to the room, silently grateful for the fact that he’s not going to have to spend the night with the others.

He’s only just sat down when there’s a knock.

Groaning, he gets up and walks over to the entryway, opening the door.

Cole stands there with a small, slight forced smile, holding a set of striped red pajamas. “These are for you.”

Eyeing him warily, Kai takes them. “Uh, th- thanks.” He stutters out, trying to ignore the way his mind flashes back to how he watched him make out with Zane.

“Are you okay? Your face is really red.”

Shit.

“Yeah I’m fine everything’s fine you should go now bye.” Kai blurts out in a rush. As soon as the words have left his mouth, he slams the door shut in his face.

Well, that solved absolutely nothing.

He has enough emotions going on- these people are crazy, and he doesn’t want to have to get to know them or have anything to do with them!

So why is his heart racing? Why does he feel like this?! He doesn’t want to like these assholes, he wants to be able to threaten to skewer them and actually mean it!

With a quiet grumble, he starts getting changed- but he almost drops the pajama shirt when he looks down at his torso.

Since when did he have a six-pack?! It’s not defined like a bodybuilder’s or anything, but he’s definitely got some strong muscles there.

Shaking his head, he goes back to putting on his pajamas. He must seriously work out a lot.

Well, if he’s a ninja savior of Ninjago, then he’s probably going to have to be in good shape.

Sighing, he turns off the light and gets on the bed. Curling up under the covers, he closes his eyes and tries to drift off.

If he’s lucky, maybe he’ll wake up back at home.

—————————

Kai wakes up in the red bed he went to sleep in.

Drat.

With a sigh, he gets up from the bed, and just as he does, the door opens.

Jay stands there, a nervous smile on his face. “I, uh… I guess your internal clock still works. But, uh, it’s breakfast time, so-“

With a groan, Kai walks over to him. “Alright, let’s go eat.” He grumbles.

He pretends not to notice how Jay tries to hold his hand, and after a moment, he stops trying to take it, and Kai ignores how that sparks guilt inside of him. It’s fine, he doesn’t care. He shouldn’t feel bad, he doesn’t even know him!

They’ve only just reached the dining room when an alarm starts blaring. Kai immediately feels himself switch into a fight-or-flight mode, trying to figure out what the hell is going on.

Then Nya’s voice comes on over the comms. “Everyone to the bridge! Now!”

Jay tenses up. “C’mon!” Without waiting for a response, he takes off running, leaving Kai to chase him down the halls.

When they arrive at the bridge, everyone else is already there.

Zane immediately starts talking. “There appears to be a genetically engineered snake being used to terrorize New Ninjago City. From what we can tell, it was created by-“

“Cut to the chase!” Nya interrupts.

Lloyd shakes his head. “No, we have comms, we can get an explanation on the way. Let’s go!”

There’s hardly a pause before they all race out of the room- but Lloyd peeks back around the corner to look at him. “You- you just wait here, okay?”

Kai doesn’t get a chance to respond before the blond runs off, leaving him alone.

What the hell just happened?

Still trying to process things, he decides to go into the living room and see if he can watch what’s going on in the news. Whatever’s going on, it seems like a big deal.

So he walks in and turns on the TV, waiting for an explanation to be given.

He watches as a reporter- Gayle Gossip, she said her name was- shows some weird ice snake thing attacking the city. Listening carefully, he can just make out some words that the ninja are saying as they try to stop it.

“- weakness to heat-“

“-Zane, fall back-“

“MOVE!”

Kai stares in horror as he watches Nya get thrown from her vehicle and tossed into a building.

Something in him screams at him to move, and he listens to it, getting up from the couch and scrambling off to wherever the hell his instinct is taking him.

He finds himself in some kind of little launchpad like area for vehicles, and finds himself gravitating towards a red motorcycle.

Oh, what is he doing? He’s not seriously going to try and fight the ice snake, is he?

Yeah. Yeah, he is. Because no one messes with his little sister.

Kai starts up the bike and continues to trust his instincts, just doing whatever feels right.

Which is how he ends up screaming his head off while he falls from the sky on the motorcycle.

The bike falls out from under him, and Kai finds himself flailing about, still screaming.

Until he feels himself get grabbed, and a loud grunt escapes him as he scrambles for purchase on whatever he just fell onto.

He blinks a few times as he realizes that he’s on a- on a dragon what the hell-

Clinging to the rider of the dragon, he feels his eyes widen as he recognizes them.

“Zane?”

The robot looks back at him. “Kai?” He seems shocked. “You were supposed to wait on the ship!”

Before the brunet gets the chance to respond, the tail of the ice snake is suddenly striking towards them, and Zane has the dragon dip, trying to avoid it.

But it’s a rocky move, and they still get hit, the dragon literally disappearing under them.

Kai hits the ground with a loud thudding noise, but luckily enough, he doesn’t seem to be too badly hurt.

He gets to his feet, and Zane quickly runs up to him, getting in close.

Kai’s about to brush him off, but he’s caught off guard by his eyes. His bright blue eyes that glow, and the deep concern behind them as they stare into his own.

“You’re not hurt, are you?” His voice is gentle, full of concern and softness.

Kai swallows, but doesn’t answer, still captivated by the glowing blue irises that seem to stare through to his soul.

“Kai? Please, are you okay?”

He nods shakily, unsure why he’s so affected by something as minor as eye contact.

“I’m going to scan you.” Zane decides, setting a hand on his shoulder. His eyes flicker a little as he looks Kai up and down, a thin band of light emitting from them and falling over Kai’s figure.

And that’s when he snaps out of it.

Stepping away, he shoves Zane back, putting his arms out in front of him in defense. “Woah there, I did not agree to be scanned! So keep that little light show to yourself!”

The robot blinks a few times as he steps back, holding his hands up in a placating gesture. “My apologies, I was only trying to-“

The snake’s tail slams into a building, sending wreckage flying everywhere. With a mumbled complaint that Kai can’t quite make out, Zane pulls him aside. “Stay out of trouble. I’ll return when the fight is over.”

Without waiting for a response, he runs off, leaving Kai alone.

He stands there for a few moments, looking around the torn up alley and listening to the nearby noises of combat. Something inside him is itching to go follow, and after a moment of consideration, he runs off towards the battle.

As soon as he gets close, he’s forced to dodge and duck behind some debris to avoid getting frozen by an icy blast. So it’s an ice creature, then?

… fire melts ice, right? Maybe if Kai can get close, he-

“Kai?! What are you doing here?!” Jay shouts, grabbing his arm and pulling him out of the way of an attack.

“I’m helping!” Kai defends himself as the ginger uses a blast of lightning to shatter a large chunk of ice that had been flying towards them.

“No! No, you are not! I’m going to have to protect you instead of actually concentrating on the fight! Why didn’t you stay on the ship?!” Jay glares, grabbing Kai by the wrist and pulling him along.

“So I could come help!” The two of them narrowly miss getting impaled by flying concrete as they duck behind a still-intact building.

Jay looks downright furious- an expression that almost looks cute on his baby-ish face. “We have just covered that you are not helping! Not. Helping. Not helping at all!”

Kai feels his face flush some at the scrunched up nose and the way his cheeks puff out. Still, he manages to defend himself. “It’s ice and I have fire powers!”

Grabbing him again, Jay drags him around as they avoid getting impaled by debris created by the snake. “If this snake doesn’t kill you, I will! And if it does, I’ll resurrect you and kill you again!”

Kai arches an eyebrow at the statement. “Aren’t you supposed to be in love with me?” He complains.

Jay gives him a look. “It’s because I love you that I threaten to kill you. Because apparently threatening is your love language.”

“Huh?”

“You do it all the ti- LOOK OUT!” Jay tackles him, sending a blast of lightning at the the tail of the snake that’s crashing down-

Everything goes bright white, and pain wracks his body, making him cry out. They manage to avoid getting crushed, but only just, and the two of them end up sprawled on the ground.

Kai feels himself twitch some, all of his hair on end. Groaning, he glances over at Jay, who’s getting to his feet.

The ginger’s eyes widen as he looks at Kai. “Shit, I- are you okay?! I didn’t mean to shock you!”

He got shocked? Hmm. That would explain the excruciating pain.

With a groan, he forces himself to sit up. “ ‘m doin’ g-great.” He gets out, ignoring his blurry vision as he struggles to his feet.

“Kai-“

Jay is cut off when the snake is suddenly whipping back through, hitting the ginger clear across the alley- and the only reason he stopped there is because of a wall.

Kai winces as he watches Jay get slammed into the concrete. That can’t feel good.

Then again, he’s not exactly in peak condition either.

He struggles to get up a few times before resolving to just lay there. Jay will come get him in a minute, and even though it’s concrete, the ground feels awfully comfortable…

Even as his vision grows more and more blurred, he manages to make out several sets of combat boots, and then someone is picking him up, dragging him away.

Kai lets them, closing his eyes. It’s probably just Cole… yeah, Cole wears black, and is definitely strong enough to carry him around. That would make sense.

The world starts to fade, and Kai doesn’t bother trying to hold onto it.

Everything hurts, and it would be so much easier to ignore it and drift away…

And that’s exactly what he does.

[tteokggukk]

game night → pjm

✳ pairing: jimin x reader

✳ genre: fluff, best friends to lovers au, (kind of a) college au

✳ warnings: mentions of alcohol, drinking, some light swearing

✳ words: 2.9k

✳ synopsis: in which you and your best friend jimin play a game of monopoly with a twist, and you find yourself spilling every thought and secret kept in your head.

✳ a/n: missed playing board games with my friends and i thought a game night scenario with jimin would be really cute. hope u enjoy reading!!

It was tradition for you and Jimin to come over at your place every week to bond and hang out. Originally you'd hang out multiple times a week, but that was back in high school. Once college started, you both decided it would no longer be realistic and possible to meet thrice a week with all the deadlines and requirements to prioritize, so you settled with once or twice every weekend. This was one of the activities neither of you ever missed or skipped out on, especially because it was the most quality time you'd ever get with your long time best friend.

Tonight was game night. As Jimin requested over text, he decided to bring Monopoly even though you begged him not to. You've never won against him even with others around, and so playing against just him wouldn't grant you lower odds. Unfortunately, you had no choice to say no because it was his turn to make plans this week.

In the span of six years you've known Jimin, you've seen each other grow into different people. Changes here and there were becoming much more prominent over time, it was hard to ignore how his body had become more defined, how his jaw had sharpened and how he'd grown inches taller than you. Back then, you were certain nothing would be able to change your friendship and that it would stay that way forever.

You hadn’t known it back then, but these gradual changes were made to rewire that sort of thinking.

For the past three years, you've developed a small crush on him which you often had to hide because you were afraid of telling him the truth. When you both started to drink, you made sure not to get too drunk around him as to not spill your secret. Jimin always thought you just hated drinks.

It was almost four in the afternoon, and Jimin would be arriving in an hour. You quickly decide to shower first and fix up before he came but avoided fixing up too much for him to question why you looked so dressed up. You didn't want him thinking you dolled yourself up for him.

It was just a casual night with your best friend.

Later on, the doorbell rang and you rushed to get the door. Jimin came in holding the box of Monopoly in one hand while carrying a paper bag in the other.

"Hey," he greeted. You took the box from his hand to help him out as he pulled you in for a side hug.

"Hi," you smiled, being completely engulfed in the familiar delicate musk of his perfume that brought you comfort.

He took his shoes off and walked into your kitchen to grab himself a glass of water. You set the board game down on your coffee table and followed him.

"What's in the bag?" You asked curiously, eyeing the paper bag he was holding.

"I thought maybe we'd play Monopoly," a playful smile crept up on his lips before bringing out three bottles of soju and placing it on your counter, "With a twist."

"Jimin! You know I don't drink much," You whined as he stepped closer to you, holding the bottle up closer to your eyes.

"These are flavored! You wouldn't even feel like you're drinking alcohol, they taste like juice, I swear," he smiled innocently, his beaming eyes were almost enough to convince you.

"I can't be hungover the next morning, I have a paper to write," You argued.

"I've never seen you hungover, how could you know how bad it is?" He laughed and placed the bottle of grapefruit soju back on the table.

"I just know they suck, because of how you deal with them." When Jimin first started drinking and would wake up with a hangover, he'd call to let you know how much his head hurt and how badly he'd throw up, so you'd come over to his place and take care of him. Over time he's gotten used to it and they're no longer as bad, but you'd still come over and cook soup for him just to help.

He always loved it when you did. When he began to notice how nurturing you've become, sometimes he'd call for the simplest of reasons just for you to spend time with him.

"I promise I'll stop you when you drink too much," he offers, to which you sigh. You could never really say no to him, anyway.

"Fine."

 "Is your cash complete?" Jimin asks you while he fixes the pile of money on the side. He was playing the banker tonight as well. 

"Yep," you told him, placing your money aside, "You done fixing that?"

"Mhm," he hums, "Wait! Almost forgot." He stands up and takes walks to your kitchen cabinet, "Where are your shot glasses?"

"Cabinet on your right," you told him while you looked through the chance cards. There was absolutely no way you were winning against him, you thought.

You both sat on the floor with the game spread on your coffee table. Grinning, he places the glasses next to the game board and opened the bottle of soju.

"So here's how we're gonna play," Jimin says excitedly, "You drink every time you land on someone's property, when you roll doubles, when you land on GO, when you go to jail, if you're in jail and I visit, whenever the other player buys a house, if you go bankrupt, and when you land on utilities and railroads."

You sat up straight with wide eyes, shocked at how smoothly he pointed out each time you had to drink. At this rate, you wondered how long it would take before you took a shot for each rule.

"Are you serious?" You asked.

"Yup," he smiles.

"We might as well have gone to a club, if you're gonna make me drink that much."

"I already altered the rules, you're supposed to drink for a lot of other stuff," he laughs, "I altered it for you." He proceeds to ruffle your hair which makes you blush. Thankfully the dim lights made it easy to hide the color on your face.

"Well, then, thank you very much," You bowed your head in sarcasm, "Why don't we start?"

"Confident you can win against me?" He smirks.

"Most of the time, yeah. But at this game I never am."

Jimin was good. And he was extremely smart. He knew how to quickly acquire properties and utilities and leave you feeling like you didn't properly know how to play the game even though you did. The rules were made for him while you were just a rookie made to watch.

"Y/n, you can buy a house, you know!" He laughs, "Babe, here." Your cheeks turn red at the nickname. You've been calling each other that for years albeit platonic, but these days it bothered you even more than it did. You cleared your throat to wipe your thoughts away.

You'd taken about five shots now. Normally, you'd have a pretty high tolerance but you could tell it wasn't going to take long before five shots turned to ten, and ten shots turned to twenty. Jimin so far has only had two.

It was hard to keep track with how much you were drinking because the alcohol was so sweet, if you weren't with Jimin you could gulp it all down in one go. The moment you could no longer count how many shots you've downed; the vision of delay was your only tell with how much you've drank so far.

Though you weren't completely drunk, you knew a couple more would be enough to make you intoxicated.

"I hate you," you muttered, cheeks feeling warm because of the alcohol kicking in, "You wanted this because I would lose."

Jimin laughs. His cheeks were also red now because of the alcohol, "I wanted this because I thought you would talk about how much you love counting the money."

"Clearly, I can't do that. I'm bankrupt," you whined as you handed him all your money for landing on his blue property with a hotel, "Oh shit."

Jimin started laughing really hard, he fell back onto the floor. When he got up, he was still laughing as he poured you another shot. Possibly your last one.

"I can't believe how bad you are at this," He chuckles as you took the glass and gulped it down in one go, "Should we stop? I feel like you've drank enough."

"The game? Hell yeah. Let's stop, I'm terrible at it," You sighed in defeat. The alcohol was definitely getting to you now. Jimin smiled to himself, clearly amused at the way you were acting. He began cleaning and packed up the board before sitting next to you on the floor, assuring you that you’d play a game you were better at the next time you had game night.

You took another shot of soju.

"Hey, hey," He takes the glass from your hands, "Babe, you're drinking way too much."

"This really does taste like juice," You were slurring now, "It's okay, I can handle it."

Jimin raises a brow and watches you carefully, "You sure?"

"Yeah I've got it," You nodded. You've forgotten all about not drinking too much around Jimin and just enjoyed the sweet taste of the alcohol in your mouth, sending you this wonderful sensation in your head.

Suddenly, as if your mouth had a mind of its own, you began talking about everything and anything. You talked about how you got annoyed whenever people would leave without closing the door, you talked about how this video of a cat made you cry the other day, how your hair hasn't been cooperating with the styles you want lately…

Jimin listened, watching the way your lips moved as it lost its filter. Even when you complained about a useless group mate, he found you magnetizing.

"I mean, I think I should've just left her name out of the paper, but teamwork was part of the criteria…" you mumbled. You looked over at Jimin, who's elbow was resting on the coffee table while his head rested on his hand. He was staring at you with this fond look and warm smile, you almost wanted to throw yourself onto him.

At least you still had restraint. Barely.

"I've never seen you drunk before," He says with crinkled eyes, "You talk more."

"Do I?"

"Mhm," He moves in closer, placing his hand on your head to play with your hair, "It feels like you're telling me everything. Like you're trying to empty all your words out."

"I've still got some reserved in my head," you told him, completely unaware of the coy smile on your face. This was new to Jimin, and it sent him a lot of mixed signals in his brain.

"Oh, yeah? Care to let them out?" He spoke, almost like he was challenging you to. 

"Alright, sure," You cleared your throat and stared up at the ceiling, "I really want a cat. I really like ice cream..." He watched you carefully, hanging on your every word.

"And I think I'm in love with you," you said, looking at him. You could tell he was startled by the look in his eyes, but all you wanted to do right now was to kiss him there on the spot.

A smile was beginning to creep up on Jimin's lips as he searched your eyes for any sign of lies. His eyes remained on yours as you slowly went nearer, and nearer. He stayed in place, clearly knowing what was to come.

And you kissed him. Even while you were intoxicated you could feel how soft his plump, pink lips were. Time had stopped and you could only hear your own heart beat now as Jimin's hands found their way to your cheeks while you held onto his wrist. No amount of alcohol could beat the feeling of elation his lips gave you.

When you both pulled away, Jimin immediately wanted to tell you everything. He had a feeling this was going to be a long night of conversations filled with confessions and soft kisses, completely different from the times you've spent together before. He was wrong, of course.

Maybe it was your body dropping from the high, but the moment your lips detached from one another, you fell asleep. Just like that. Jimin was worried at first, wondering maybe you've really had too much alcohol, but when he started hearing your small, quiet snores, he felt relieved. He laughed at how easily you dozed off and carried you to bed, admiring you for a while before proceeding to clean up the mess. When he was done cleaning, he freshened up a bit, changed into his extra clothes and got into bed with you.

He allowed himself to play with your hair (he always loved doing that) and observe your facial features which he always admired before holding you in his arms until he fell asleep.

When you woke up the next day, you felt the sun hit your eyes followed by the smell of breakfast perking you up. The moment you sat up, you could feel a grave headache coming in as this weird feeling in your stomach began to stir.

You had this unbelievable urge to vomit. You rushed out of bed to puke in the toilet, not realizing Jimin had seen you and followed you to hold your hair up and rub your back. When you were done, you wiped the vomit off of your mouth and gargled some water, preparing to brush your teeth. You looked at the mirror in disgust. Your face looked awful and worn out and extra tired, it was obvious you were drinking last night. You almost screamed when you saw Jimin standing behind you through the mirror.

"Jimin, oh my God," You breathed out, "You scared me."

He laughed a bit before moving his hands to your waist, hugging you a bit before kissing your cheek, "I made breakfast. You should come join me." He leaves the bathroom to give you some privacy, allowing to do whatever you needed to do. You were a bit embarrassed at the gesture because you had just vomited, but it still made you feel butterflies.

When you were done brushing your teeth and washing your face, you went to join Jimin for breakfast. 

Looking at him now, you could clearly remember the stuff that happened last night before you knocked yourself out. You kissed him, you told him how you felt, you came onto him first— there was no turning back from that.

"Last night was my first time seeing you drunk," Jimin chuckles softly, "Did you know you talk a lot more when you drink?"

"Yeah…" you laughed nervously, "It's annoying."

"It was amusing," he grins, "I could get used to it."

You couldn't help but smile. After you finished eating breakfast, Jimin handed you a glass of water and ibuprofen and insisted that you stay in bed while he washed the dishes. You tried to tell him you could help, but he said it was his job to take care of you this time and you couldn't refuse.

When he was done washing the dishes, he sat beside you on your bed.

"Do you need anything? I could make you some food. Carbs are good for hangovers," he offers.

"No, I think I'm okay," you smiled, trying to muster up the courage to talk about what happened, "Jimin, about last night."

Should you say sorry? No, it would sound like you regretted it. He kissed you back, didn't he? What did you need to talk about? What did you need to hear? What would make you stop worrying?

"Before you say anything else," Jimin gently holds your hand, "I'm in love with you, too."

Just like that, the storm in your head had stopped.

"You are?" You sat up, but sort of regretted it because of the throbbing pain that intensified in your head.

"Yeah, always have been," he smiles sheepishly.

"Since when?" You asked.

"Since our third year in high school. I don't really know what sparked it, I just remember noticing how much prettier you got and how smart you sounded."

You laughed, "Really? I never knew."

"I’ve tried flirting with you countless times, you know," he admitted, a shy smile on his face, "I don't think you ever got the message."

"I guess now you know," you smiled, "Message received."

He smiles really wide and squeezes your hand. You pat the empty side of the bed and Jimin understands as he begins to lie down next to you, holding you in his arms.

"Get some rest, I'll wake you up later for your paper," he says softly while caressing your hair. You could feel his chest rising up and down, calming your senses. Being with him right now made you feel like you were in the safest place on Earth.

"Thank you," you spoke quietly, the smile never leaving your lips. Before you knew it, your eyes began to flutter shut but you didn't miss the way Jimin kissed your head.

"I love you," he whispered. Little did Jimin know that the perfect cure to your hangover wasn't ibuprofen or cooking up food with carbs. 

It was being here, held up safe in his arms.

a/n: hope u guys liked it :’( here are links to my other works if you’d like to check them out:

let’s fall in love for the night (taehyung x reader)

welcome to my youtube channel (taehyung x reader)

all an act (seokjin x reader)

and my ongoing social media au, fan identity (jungkook x reader) in which the taglist is open! just send an ask :-)

i should make a masterlist soon ;-;

see you in my next fic/edit!

[tooruluv]

Tooru Oikawa x F!Reader ( part 5 )

❝ my love for him is much like winter, a skeleton for the world to see. too bad he never liked the cold. ❞

description: being the neighbor and lifelong best friend of tooru oikawa definitely had it’s perks. you were never an outcast, always had a seat at lunch, got into volleyball games for free. the problem was, however, that being in love with him outweighed those perks. you would never tell him that, though, even if it hurt like hell.

genre: best friends to lovers, angst, unrequited love, fluff if you squint hard enough

word count: 1,916

warnings/notes: what if i just said “fuck the schedule”? anyway this one is a bit shorter so i’ve decided to post it early! some warnings: underage drinking (per usual), angst (per usual), and strong language (are we surprised?). enjoy, my loves.

tag list: @afuckingunicornn​ @maii-flowers​ @clandestinerays​ @brownandchill​ @readeretal​ @wedojustbevibin​ @shigarakiskitten​ @shittykawaa​

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For the first time ever, you didn’t meet the boys in the back after the game. For the first time ever, you just gave them a wave from the bleachers and left. For the first time ever, you didn’t congratulate them on a win.

It felt off. Oikawa never sent you a look, either; never stole a glance.

Sana met you outside (she was one of the girls who crowded the boys on the court after). She was smiling and cheerful and bright, as usual.

“That game was amazing!” She exclaimed as you began walking. “You wore the jersey! I didn’t find you in the crowd, I really tried! I only found you after the game ended.” She paused, but didn’t stop walking beside you. “Where are we going? Don’t you live next to Tooru..?”

“We’re getting alcohol.” You told her. “I’m not feeling myself tonight and would love to get a drink.”

“Oh, even better.”

The Sakanoshita Store was still open, neon lights still burning in the setting sun. It wasn’t too far, just a little out of the way, and Sana never complained once.

“Hello, my darling Keishin!” You greeted the man behind the counter.

“You brought a friend this time.” He stated simply. His paper was still high in front of his face, the smoke of his cigarette hovering above it.

“I did. She’s cool, don’t worry.” You placed a pack of wine coolers, hard lemonade, and a bottle of vodka on the counter. “We’re having girls’ night.”

“Looks like it.”

He set the paper down as he placed your drinks in a black bag and took your money. Always with the fast exchanges. You grabbed the bag.

“Now get out.”

“Adore you too!”

It was you who linked your arm through Sana’s, this time, as you left.

You had Tetsurou Kuroo’s number.

He offered it to you, along with his friendship, at the game as he scratched the back of his neck and did his best to pretend he flirted with girls all the time. You thought it was cute.

“Here’s my number. Text or call it sometime.” He had told you confidently, but then let the façade fall. “Or not. That’s fine too. Also, please don’t call me. I don’t answer calls from numbers I don’t know.”

You chuckled, and finally sat up from your slouched position on the bleacher. “Are you sure you want to give your number to a girl from a school you’re up against?”

“Yes, I’m sure. She happens to be cool.”

You raised a brow. “You don’t know her that well.”

“I know that she’s still talking to me while she’s pissed as fuck. And that she’s funny, and that she didn’t care that I was scouting from another school.” He told you. “I say that’s pretty cool.”

“She might have to text you, then.”

But as you walked with Sana to your house, you didn’t know if you were going to. You didn’t want him to expect a relationship, not when your heart clearly belonged to someone else. But if he was only looking for a friend.. maybe. You didn’t know. You were confused.

It scrambled your mind as you just focused on getting home and hanging out with the girl who was dating the man you love.

Iwaizumi hadn’t expected you to be waiting in your normal spot after the game. He knew that you mainly did that to walk home with Oikawa. Still, it was odd to come out to emptiness.

He was adjusting his bag on his shoulder when Oikawa came out of the door. Iwaizumi noticed that he looked disappointed for a moment, just a flash of emotion across his best friend’s face that he wouldn’t have caught if he didn’t know him as well as he did.

They started walking in silence.

Until, “Hey, Iwa.”

“Hi.”

“Is she mad at me?”

A pause. They didn’t need to define who “she” was.

“I’m not the one who needs to answer that.” Iwaizumi didn’t look at him, frustration heavy on his shoulders. “You almost kissed her and then told her that there was nothing to talk about.”

“She told you about that?”

“She tells me everything.”

“Oh.”

Oikawa sounded sad. Or defeated, to use a better term. Iwaizumi almost felt bad for him. He had no idea. Oikawa had no idea how hurt you had been, how much love you held for that man. He had no idea how much the little things he did affected you.

“She isn’t mad at you.” Iwaizumi finally told him, catching Oikawa’s attention. “She just… she just doesn’t understand. Why you’re not talking to her, keeping secrets. It never used to be like that between you two before.”

Another pause. “I couldn’t tell her.”

“Hm?” He didn’t hear Oikawa, his response nearly a mumble.

“I couldn’t tell her. I don’t know why, but I couldn’t tell her. About me and Sana.” Oikawa was staring at the stars, like they would give him some answer that he was searching for. “I only got together with Sana at the party, made it official or whatever. I was going to tell her that morning, but then I almost fucking kissed her. And now whenever I see her I think of the fact that I was so close to kissing her, and I can’t bring it up to Sana because what asshole makes it official with his girlfriend and then almost kisses another girl the next morning?” He took a breath.

“You’re not an asshole.” Iwaizumi looked at the boy beside him. “But ignoring your best friend because of something that didn’t even happen is a dick move. She misses you.”

A sarcastic laugh.

“I’m being serious.” He stopped in front of Oikawa’s house. “You’re confused, and that’s fine, but she’s even more confused. She’s not mad at you.”

“Are you dating?”

The question was so out of nowhere, Iwaizumi had to look around to figure out where it came from.

“Oh, you brilliant asshole.”

“You guys have been spending so much time together, and I always feel like I’m interrupting something whenever you two are talking, and…”

“I’m going to stop you there.” He placed a hand on Oikawa’s shoulder. “Me and her? Never dated, not dating, and never going to date. She’s not my type.”

God, he wanted to just scream from the rooftops at the two of them. Wanted to just tell him that you were in love with him, wanted him to know why you were as broken by this as you were. Hajime Iwaizumi was a lot of things, but being a dick was not one of them. He would never.

“Not your type..?”

He took his hand off of his shoulder, patting it twice before turning to walk towards his house. “She’s not my type. Besides, I’ve been dating Matsukawa for months.”

Six shots in and three wine coolers, and you were laying upside down on your desk chair. Sana sat on your bed, back against the wall and a giggling mess. The entire night had consisted of telling stories, asking each other questions, and getting to know each other. It was extremely fun.

“I met a boy tonight.” You spilled to her, giggling a little.

“A boy?” Sana leaned forward, cup still in hand and intrigue in her eyes. “You met a boy? Did you get his number?”

“Yeah, but..”

“You have to go for it!”

“I don’t know, it’s weird.”

“Oh no, was he weird?”

“No, he was super cool.” You smiled at the thought. “And super smart too. Came scouting from another school. The thing is, I’ve kind of had a thing for another guy for a while, and it’s weird to think of someone else in that way.”

 Subtle. You didn’t care.

 “The guy you’ve had a thing for, does he have a thing for you?” Sana didn’t ask you who, or pressure it. You liked her.

“No.”

“Then go for the boy you met today! You deserve a boy who likes you like you like him. Besides,” she motions to you. “You’re sexy as fuck. Any man who doesn’t have a thing for you is crazy.”

“I know you’re not the one telling me that.”

“Hand me your phone.”

You spun in the chair to sit upright, giving her your phone. She sat her cup on the floor as her glossy eyes scanned the device.

“The boy in question’s name?”

“Kuroo.”

“Mm, spell it.” Sana started typing as you told her the characters. A final tap. “There you go. The start of something new.”

She handed your phone back to you, and you looked at what she did. A simple text to Kuroo, a simple “hey! it’s the cute girl from the game ;D”.

Sana chugged the rest of her drink. “Oh! Oh my god, if you guys end up becoming a couple you can go on double dates with me and Tooru!! Oh, please let that happen I’ve been dying…”

You didn’t really pay attention as you watched the three little dots pop up. Kuroo was typing.

You never got hangovers. It was something you pride yourself in. Turns out, neither did Sana. Which is how you ended up where you were: fully dressed, hair and a little bit of makeup on (curtesy of Sana), and two bags in your arms at the mall before noon.

“Did he text? Did he?” Sana begged, head over your shoulder.

Kuroo and you had texted the majority of the night. Some of which were blurry, as you were pretty drunk for most of it (and he knew that, and reminded you to drink water but only if that doesn’t consist of walking down stairs).

And, this morning, decided to accept your invitation to join you and your friend (yes, you and Sana were considered friends now) at the mall.

You spotted him, sending him a wave to know where you were. He caught your eye and waved back as he navigated through the human traffic. Kuroo was wearing just black jeans and a random red shirt, and you’ve decided that red looks good on him.

“That’s him, the one in the red and the dark hair.” You told Sana.

“Mhm, that’s a man for sure.” She joked, bumping you with her hip when he finally was close enough to talk to.

“Hello, Tetsurou Kuroo.”

“Helllo, cool girl.” He greeted.

“Hope you don’t mind my friend came with me. This is Sana.”

You could’ve sworn that his eyes never left yours until that moment, like you were the only person he could see, and he hadn’t noticed the tall and pretty girl next to you until you brought her up. It made your insides swirl.

He shook his head before greeting her as well. “Hi, Sana. Nice to meet you.”

“Actually, I think I’m going to go shopping at Victoria’s Secret for a minute. I’ll leave you two to it.” She turned to you, sending you a small wink. “Meet me in the food court later?”

“I.. You’re sure?”

She pulled you closer by your arm, whispering into your ear just loud enough for you to hear. “I’m telling you right now that I would rather stare at a brick wall than third wheel for the rest of the day; I can feel his attraction towards you burning in the air. We can hang out tomorrow at school and you can tell me all about it.”

She pulled back, smiling as though she just told you something completely normal. “Nice to meet you, Kuroo. Take care of my girly, okay?”

Kuroo held up his right hand. “I solemnly swear.”

[myhockeyworld87]

Not So Dangerous Liaison - Sidney Crosby - Part 12

Word Count: 3,765

POV: Reader

Warning: NSFW, Sweet smut (is that a thing), Language, Oral, Sex

Notes: Big shoutout to the 4 new people that followed me to put me over 800 follwers and actually got me to post this early. Never imagined that this is where I’d be almost a year ago when I started this thing. I had this Crosby piece in my head even back then, and it’s been so amazing watching it come to life.So glad you guys enjoy it. So here’s the smut that has been building between these two since the beginning. Let me know what you guys think! Happy Reading!

Not So Dangerous Liaison Masterlist

Part of you still couldn’t believe you let Sid kiss you right there as you were leaving Mario’s house. You knew some of his teammates saw you, but honestly after the whole night; you just didn’t care. Well, you did, since you really enjoyed your job, but it wasn’t like you couldn’t go back to your old one. They’d already asked you back a couple times, but you’d cross that bridge when you came to it.

You still weren’t sure how a couple nights with Sid had led everyone, including him, to believe that the two of you were now dating. Were you guys that obvious? Of course, you knew Flower and Vero knew that something was going on between the two of you. Which lead you to believe that Tanger and Catherine also had an idea, but Mario? It just seemed unreal since the two of you hadn’t really defined anything until that night.

All these thoughts ran through your brain, as the two of you made your way back to Sid’s house. “What’s going on in that pretty head of yours?” Sid asked as you strolled hands linked together.

“I don’t know, everything…nothing…the whole entire night. Does that make any sense?”

He stopped so that he could look you in the eye when he answered. “Kind of. I mean tonight was kind of big a step.”

“Ya think.”

He kissed your forehead, before continuing. “Look (Y/N), I know this is all kind of moving fast, but it’s not like I haven’t been thinking about it…or rather you.” You understood that since he’d kind of been on your mind constantly as of late. “I was stupid last year, after Flower’s party. I thought you’d be this huge distraction to me and set me off my course for everything that I want to accomplish.” A dry laugh escaped his mouth. “It was really the opposite, now that I look back on it. Once I realized, that I could have both, I’ve thought of nothing but you…well, and hockey. It’s like we were made for each other, ya know?” Funny, you actually thought the same thing that first night that you’d really got to know him. Sure, you liked Sidney Crosby hockey player extraordinaire, but Sid the person…well that was someone that you could grow to love. “I think some people, the ones that really know me, realized this long before I did.” You knew he probably meant Mario, and Flower, among others. “But now that I know, I just don’t want to waste any time with all the bullshit stuff.” You cocked your head wondering what he exactly meant by that. “Well, maybe that’s not the right word, because I still want to take you out to fancy dinners and show you off. I just want you to be part of my world right now. Like I don’t want to have to wait, because I don’t think we need to.” You kind of understood what he was saying. It was as if you two had skipped the getting to know you part of dating, because well, you essentially already knew each other. You knew how he took his coffee, and what history books he had and hadn’t read. How even though he told the media oatmeal cookies were a good choice, he never called them his favorites, because secretly chocolate chip were. You also knew how he had to have a certain brand of peanut butter for his sandwiches. He was truly right; you two kind of had been dating all along.

He went to say more, but you stopped him. “You’re right. We don’t need official dinners or any of the other things. I know you Sid, and I think you know me. I like where we’re at right now, so let’s just keep moving forward.”

“So does that mean you’re going to tomorrow?”

“Yes, I’ll go.” You tugged on his hand to continue on to his place.

“And you’ll ride in my car in the parade then?” You hadn’t really given much thought to that. That would be a huge step. His parents would be there and all of Pittsburgh would be watching.

“Um…let’s just see how tomorrow goes.”

“Deal,” He answered, and put in the code to let the two of you into his drive. “So, can I talk you into coming in for a drink? Or maybe…”

“I think we’ve both had enough to drink.” It wasn’t like either of you were drunk by any means but you knew that neither of you needed another glass. “Why don’t you just ask me what you really want?” After last night, you kind of assumed sleeping over was going to be a thing with him.

“Ok. How about you stay the night with me, again?”

“I thought you’d never ask.” You teased him before he pulled you close to him.

“Well if I knew you were waiting for an invitation; I would’ve asked the moment you pulled in the drive.” He spun you around, arms still circled around your waist, and made his way to the door. “So, no alcohol, but do you want something else instead?”

“Just water.” He grabbed two and then led you upstairs to his room. You remembered being up there the night of the Eastern Conference final win, but you hadn’t been adventurous enough to figure out which room was his. You’d simply made your way into what you assumed was the guest bathroom. This time though you took every little detail in. His room was off to the left, done in mostly shades of gray. It had a masculine aura to it. Quiet and understated, there were very few tokens of his hockey career in this room unlike some others in his house. There was a comfy chair by the window, with one of the history books you’d given him sitting on the side table next to it. You could picture him reading there as the rain gently hit the glass. He ducked into a huge walk-in closet, with built-in drawers and shelves, that any person would envy.

“I’m assuming you didn’t bring anything to sleep in.” You shook your head no and he pulled you out another one of his t-shirts just like he had a few weeks ago, then took your hand and headed into the ensuite. A massive jetted tub that could hold the both of you, captured your attention.  Gray marble showcased the entire room, which had a double vanity sink and a shower with so many gadgets in it; you weren’t sure you’d know how to turn the water on. There were even two toilet rooms, one for him and one for her, which made you wonder what he was thinking when he’d remodeled the home or was this something in its original design. All in all, the entire master suite took your breath away, kind of like the man who owned it.

You set your bag on the edge of the tub. “Do you care if I lay these out to dry? Since someone threw me in the pool.”

“Of course, I don’t care, and in my defense, you had a bathing suit on already.”

It was true, but he still could’ve sounded a bit remorseful. “My dress is probably ruined though.” You knew it wasn’t but you enjoyed teasing him about it, as you laid the garment out on the tub.

He wrapped his arms around you and peered over your shoulder to look at it. “Hmm seems fine, though I’ll gladly buy you ten to replace it if I can throw you in the pool again.”

“Sid,” you chided.

“What? I enjoyed looking at it clinging to your body.” Your eyes grew wide, and you barely had time to comprehend his words as he spun you around and kissed you hard, turning you into jelly, before releasing you. “So, do you need a toothbrush or anything?”

“What, if I open one of these drawers, am I going to find your secret stash you keep here for all the women that sleepover?”

You were totally teasing him, but he frowned none the less. “You know it’s not like that (Y/N).”

“I know. I was just kidding you. Now, if you have a purple one, I’ll totally take that.” He smiled then grabbed one out of the multi-pack he had in the drawer. The two of you stood at the dual sink brushing your teeth like a couple who had lived together for the last six months. It was kind of surreal. Once you were finished you changed into the shirt he’d offered in the small toilet room. By the time you came out to the bedroom, he’d stripped down to his boxers and was taking pillows off the bed. “You know I forgot to ask you which side you wanted last night.”

“It doesn’t matter, as long as I’m holding you.” It was corny and sweet, and it made you blush. The king-size bed seemed even larger than the one you two had shared last night, as you crawled in under the covers; Sid joining you. He shut the light off, then pulled you near. You were both laying on your sides facing each other, his arm draped across your waist, idly drawing small circles on your lower back. The smile plastered on his face was a mirror image of your own. Neither of you said a word, for a full minute, before you reached over and cupped his jaw, bringing your mouth to his. Your tongues mingled, lightly sucking and tasting each other. You let your hands roam down his chiseled chest feeling the muscles bunch under your touch. Your fingertips just lightly grazing over his skin.

His hand at your back pulled you closer so that there was barely any space between the two of you. You felt him reach for the hem of your shirt, and gently raise it so his fingers could caress your bare skin. Everywhere he touched set you on fire and you felt your legs move restlessly so that one was draped over the top of him. Sid’s hand glided up your sides and along the underside of your breast, making you whimper softly into his mouth. You longed to feel his touch there, and he didn’t disappoint as his thumb gently slid back and forth over your nipple.

You had to break the kiss for a second to suck in a breath of air, for he had you panting with need. But Sid just continued to kiss you; down your jaw, over to your ear, then sucking at the hollow of your neck, while his hand fondled your breast. It wasn’t enough though; you wanted more. Your hips flexed into him and you could feel the hard length of him against your body. He gently rocked into and you groaned from the pleasure. The two of you like teens dry humping each other afraid of being caught by their parents.

He slowed then, coming back up to sweetly kiss your mouth, as his hand dropped away for your breast. “No, Sid,” you whined. “Don’t stop.”

He pulled back to look at you, to make sure that this was what you wanted. “Are you sure?”

“God, yes,” You breathed out, then added. “I want you so bad.”

“Oh god, (Y/N), I want you too.” His mouth was on yours again with renewed passion, only breaking the kiss long enough to strip you out of his borrowed t-shirt. He rolled you onto your back, lifting up to stare reverently down at your body. “You’re so beautiful.” He said the words like a prayer, one full of worship and meaning, and then his mouth was on yours in the same manner. Kissing down your collarbone, to take one of your peaked nipples into his mouth. Your back arched into him and cried out with pleasure, your body responding to his every touch. He moved to your other breast giving it the same lavish attention, as your hands sifted through his freshly shortened locks to hold him to you. Involuntarily, your hips lifted up into him seeking something only he could give. One of his hands forced them back down. “Easy baby.” He whispered, then loving kissed your lips.

His hand at your hip skated down between your legs where he cupped your mound. You were slightly embarrassed as you knew that he could feel the wetness seeping through your panties there. All mortification was lost when the heel of his hand ground into your pussy. It was the exact friction you were looking for and you couldn’t help but moan into his mouth. His fingers danced along the folds of your lace-covered mound, teasing and making you squirm. When his index finger slipped under the edge of your panties, you about jumped off the bed, but his strong body pinned you down. A whimper came out of your mouth, as that same digit slowly dragged up your slit to circle your clit a few times.

He released your lips, both of you breathing heavily, as his finger still tortured your throbbing pussy. Sid’s mouth started its unhurried descent down your body. The covers of the bed falling to the bottom as he went, leaving your body exposed. His finger slid out, as his mouth hovered above the top of your panties. He breathed in your scent, before hooking his fingers around the strings and pulling them down. You lifted your hips up to help him, and in no time, he was tossing them to the floor. His hand glided up from your ankles, over your calves and onto your thighs, where he pushed your legs a little further apart. Lowering his head, he peppered your inner thighs with kisses, and you could feel yourself growing even wetter if that was even possible. The anticipation was killing you. You willed yourself to relax under his gaze, as you looked down at Sid, who was poised at your most intimate juncture. A small smile graced his lips before his tongue flicked out, licking his way between your folds. Just that small movement had you crying out. “Oh god,” you felt his grin grow wider against you, before sucking on your clit, tweaking it with his tongue. Your legs trembled slightly, and you fisted the sheets in your grasp, needing something to hold on to. He slid one of his long fingers inside you and had you moaning out loud. The digit moved in and out working you into a feverish frenzy, as his mouth worried your little nub with his lips and tongue. Everyone knew Sid excelled on the ice, but apparently, he was also an award winner in the bedroom.

You could feel the orgasm bubbling up inside your body, and as he slid a second finger into you; you were close to falling off the edge. Your hips bucked forward into his mouth, and he used a strong arm to keep you pinned to the bed once more. “Please…” you pleaded, as you chased the high that was just hovering out of your reach. He hooked his fingers then, making the come-hither motion; the action tickling that spot that would bring you the pleasure you sought. It started then, from deep within you; the small tremble of your legs, the way you panted out for air, and then it crested. A climax so strong, you found yourself screaming out his name, as wave after wave of pleasure wracked your body. Sid slowed his assault on pussy as the last tremors of your orgasm subsided.

Once your body had finally calmed, his fingers slid out of you as he lifted his head, that signature smirk on his face. He took the back of his hand, wiping away your juices that were left on him, before sliding up the length of your body. His mouth found yours and you could taste your essence still on him. It was heady and intoxicating and brought your body back to life. You skated your hands down his abdomen, to the waistband of his boxers, where you snuck your hand inside to feel his hard erection. He hissed out his pleasure as you took his length in your hand, just stroking him up and down. The garment impeded what you really wanted to do, so you pushed them down and he kicked them off. You continued to pump him, before breaking your kiss to nudge the wall that was his chest, so that you could take him into your mouth. Sid wasn’t having any of it though and he captured your gaze before taking your hand and removing it from his member. “Not tonight baby.” He kissed your lips again, before clarifying. “I won’t be able to last, and I want to be inside you.” You nodded your understanding, and he rolled off you to search the nightstand for a condom.

He ripped open the small pouch with his teeth. “Let me,” you asked taking the thin piece of latex in your hand. You stroked him a few times, biting your lip to keep from taking him inside your mouth. The condom rolled down his shaft and you tugged the tip leaving a small amount of space for him to fill with his seed. He drew your body down on top of him then, your chest pressed against his as your tongues mated together, mimicking what your bodies would soon do. He grabbed your ass and rolled you onto your back again; your legs wrapping around him as he did. Taking his cock in hand, he positioned himself at your entrance, lightly running it between your folds to coat it with your wetness, then nudging ever so slowly the tip inside. His left hand reached up and entwined with your right, as he carefully entered you inch by inch. When he bottomed out, you released a moan of delight at the feel of him within you.

“God you feel so good, baby.” He hissed out before capturing his lips with his. Only then did he start to move, interlacing his other hand with yours as he pumped in and out of you. It was a dance as old as time, and the two of you moved to a rhythm that had your body burning to a feverish crescendo. He sped up his pace, a sheen of sweat building on his brow, and while it may have been your first time with him; you knew that he was close to cumming. Breaking the kiss, he groaned with an effort to stave off his climax, determined to bring you with him. You shifted slightly, changing the angle, and then you were there, the orgasm peaking with each thrust of his cock.

“Sid,” you called out, his name like a benediction as you quivered underneath his body. A few grunts and sloppy thrust and he was there with you, moaning your name in his own ecstasy. With one last push, he slumped down on your body, sated and relaxed. When he went to roll off you, you held him close, just cherishing this moment for a minute longer. You knew the two of you had chemistry, it was there from the moment almost a year ago, but this; this was just on another level.

“I’m gonna crush you.” He whispered, a light chuckle to his voice as you finally let him roll you both onto your sides. As he did, his cock still stayed deep inside your body, though you could feel him going flaccid. He cupped your cheek and kissed you tenderly, his lips soft, gentle, and loving on yours. It was one that spoke to you on some other level, but you didn’t examine it too closely. “That was…” You held your breath waiting for him to finish even though you want to say that it was everything. It was magical, and wonderful, and almost like being in a dream. “Perfect,” he breathed out and you had to agree. It was the one word that encompassed all those things.

“Yeah, it was.” You echoed back. He slipped out of your body then and made a move to leave the bed. You didn’t realize you whimpered until he looked back at you.

“You ok?”

Of course, you were; you just missed the feel of him inside, on top of you and all around you. “Yeah,” you whispered before he leaned down and placed yet another kiss on your lips.

“I’ll be right back.” It hadn’t occurred to you that he was leaving to dispose of the condom until he slid it off. He made his way to the ensuite, where you could hear the water running. You slid out of the bed and padded your way across the floor to find him. He was splashing water on his face. As he padded himself off, he caught you staring at him, so you went and wrapped your arms around him from behind.

“Looks like I should be the one asking if you’re ok?” You dropped a kiss to his shoulder blade as the two of you stared at each other in the mirror.

“Better than ok.” He answered, then turned in your arms, his hands going to your waist and lifting you, to set you up on the vanity. He took the cloth he’d just wiped his face with, wet it, and spread your legs before wiping the remains of what had just happened between the two of you. Part of you cursed the loss, but the gesture was so sweet, it had your smiling in the end. Once he was done, he tossed the rag back into the sink, then wrapped your legs around his hips and carried you back to bed. He kissed your forehead, then your nose and finally your mouth. “Time to sleep.” He whispered and you smiled against his lips.

“Should we set the alarm?” You were so used to both of you getting up for practice that it was a force of habit to ask.

“I think we deserve to sleep in tomorrow (Y/N).” He chuckled. “We don’t have to be anywhere until late afternoon. Which gives us ample time to do that again.”

“Mmm, I do like what you’re thinking there.” He stole one last kiss, before tucking you into his side; your head resting on his chest. Your fingers danced along his skin as he ran his up and down your arm and you thought this just might be a little bit of heaven.  

[enneagramwingmiranda]

How I Met Your Mother: The actual enneagram types of Ted, Marshall, Lily, Barney, and Robin

The Hopeless Romantic: Ted Mosby [Type 2]

“Love doesn’t make sense! You can’t logic your way into or out of it. Love is totally nonsensical. But we have to keep doing it or else we’re lost and love is dead, and humanity should just pack it in. Because love is the best thing we do.“

Core Desire: To be loved, wanted, and needed

Core Fear: Being dismissed, discarded, or rejected

Ted’s main goal in the show is to find love and be loved in return (in almost a desperate fashion). He often does grand gestures to win love interests over and is dubbed as the most romantic guy of the friend group. Ted doesn’t really have much of a personality outside of just wanting to be loved. It is also noted that he is a bit pretentious and is also an architect. His behavior can sometimes look like a 4 but the enneagram is based on motivations rather than behavior. Ted doesn’t behave in much of a helper fashion unless there is a motive behind it (i.e. getting a girl to date him). However, type 2′s are connected to 4′s in that they can look like 4′s when in growth. It can be said that Ted is always in growth mode as he lives and learns from his failed relationships. With that said, Ted is 100% motivated by wanting to be loved, wanted, and needed. Ted isn’t the healthiest 2 and is a bit narcissistic, which clearly affects his behavior not appearing as stereotyped as a 2. He perceives himself to be the victim in a lot of situations when he has done a lot of messed up things to the girls he dated. He judges his friend Barney a lot for his behavior when he is a lot more like him than he realizes. He pressures Robin for life she doesn’t want and doesn’t respect her boundaries. However, the weakness of 2′s is pride and 2′s go into 8′s when stressed so maybe it actually does fit. 

The Humanitarian: Marshall Eriksen [Type 6]

“Yeah, I’m scared, ok? But when I think about spending the rest of my life with Lily. Committing forever with no other women, it doesn’t scare me at all. I’m marrying that girl.”

Core Desire: To be secure and in community

Core Fear: Being stranded and without support or safety

Marshall is very much defined by his loyalty and duty. He gives his all to his job, wife, family, and friends. He even only has been with one woman (Lily) and doesn’t quite comprehend his friends who have many causal relationships. He feels a responsibility to do good by the universe shown in his passion for global warming which is why he became a lawyer. He is very compassionate and always strives to be prepared. He balances out the sometimes impulsive and reckless, Lily. He is very down to earth and very grounded. Marshall is very much affected by those who take his loyalty for granted, shown in his utter mental turmoil after Lily abandons him and when his boss overlooks him so he quits. He values the security his circle brings him when life isn’t always so stable. Marshall doesn’t seem to have excessive anxiety which is the extreme version of a six. He seems to be a very healthy six.

The Bohemian: Lily Aldrin-Eriksen [Type 4]

“Definitions are important.”

Core Desire: To find her true heart and feel deeply seen and known

Core Fear: Being too much or not enough

Lily is a hard character to type. She comes off as a 7 with her optimism, fun-loving, and adventuress nature. She also comes off as a 2 due to her need to always give advice and sometimes assert herself when she’s not needed. However, when 4′s go into stress they look like 2′s. The friend group does put her in a lot of stressful situations. With that said, I believe Lily is a type 4. Lily is deep, introspective, insightful, emotional, and empathetic. She is very in tune with her emotions and challenges everyone else to be emotionally open and true to themselves. She is motivated by a need to be special and unique, as well as, leave her mark on the world. She struggles greatly with her identity and making sure she is living a life that is reflective of her truest self. This is essentially what gave her cold feet at first when she was engaged to Marshall; she felt she wasn’t being true to herself by neglecting her artistic side. She was very much an individualist in high school and college, with her gothic like style. It seems Marshall rubbed off on her a bit with his dutiful nature and stability. She eventually paves her way with her art career, achieving her desire and balancing it out with her duties as a wife, friend, and mother. When 4′s are in growth, they take on behaviors of a 1 and we definitely see this with her. 

The Womanizer: Barney Stinson [Type 7]

“This is going to be legen… wait for it …dary!”

Core Desire: To be free to meet his needs through finding new opportunities

Core Fear: Being trapped in pain or boredom

Barney is a classic 7 but a very unhealthy 7. He is constantly striving to fill himself up while avoiding being tied down. He essentially has a sex addiction and avoids connecting emotionally to protect himself from the emotional pain that could follow a heartbreak. He sees the bright side of every situation, in his case, inappropriately hyping up and idealizing the bachelor (fuckboy) lifestyle. Barney’s utter lack of empathy is quite concerning, though it’s just a comedic TV show so I’ll try not to look at it so seriously! 

The Skeptic: Robin Scherbatsky [Type 5]

“I may not love you the way you love me, but I do love you.”

Core Desire: To be competent and self-sufficient

Core Fear: Being depleted and without resources

Robin is very isolated, logical, and introverted. She very much appears as a 3 because she constantly expresses that her career is her main priority, however, I believe Robin does this because it is the ‘safe’ thing to do rather than having a deep innate desire to be successful. She turns down a lot of potential opportunities due to fears of overextending herself. Robin also isn’t very image oriented; what you see is what you get with her. For Robin, it’s about independence and being able to meet her needs without needing others. She is extremely knowledgeable about means of self protection. She is motivated by a need to capable and competent. I believe that the trauma she faced from having a father who did not accept her for who she is and emotionally neglected her, resulted in this personality development. She believes she must to be enough for herself because her emotional needs were never met. The isolation she creates between herself and others is a survival method she developed and had to unlearn. Luckily, her friends served as a safe space for her to be vulnerable and in community.

[bookish-mbti]

Some Frasier MBTI types

Scott has gotten me into watching Frasier and these characters are satisfyingly typable, so I wanted to make a post elaborating on the MBTI types of the Crane brothers.

Frasier Crane | ENFJ

Frasier’s functional stack is easily readable and because of it, he is a fantastic example of an ENFJ. The outer world and social structures are what defines Frasier’s reality.

Frasier exists in the outer world of established external structures, measurements of value, and social status. He appreciates things that can be thought of as impressive based on external reference, even such as the items he so values in his apartment: “This lamp by Corbusier, the chair by Eames, and this couch is an exact replica of the one Coco Chanel had in her Paris atelier.” He likes things that are socially recognized to be impressive or renowned.

ENFJs also use auxiliary Ni, and as such, Frasier is very insightful and thrives when guiding individuals towards their best path and potential. His radio show allows him to do this on a broader scale with a wider audience, while also allowing him to fulfill his role in a way noticeable externally within the societal structure he values. Fe-Ni tends to work with groups of people such as a classroom as a teacher, and in Frasier’s case, it is his radio show.

Se is tertiary in Frasier. ENJs, though they are not Se dominant, are often very action-based. This advice from Frasier, in my opinion, exemplifies healthy use of an ENFJ’s functions: “Six months ago, I was living in Boston. My wife had left me, which was very painful. Then she came back to me, which was excruciating. On top of that, my practice had grown stagnant, and my social life consisted of... hanging around a bar night after night. You see, I was clinging to a life that wasn’t working anymore, and I knew I had to do something, anything. So, I ended the marriage once and for all, packed up my things, and moved back here to my hometown of Seattle. I took action. And you can, too. Move, change, do something; if it’s a mistake, do something else.”

Tertiary Se is more noticeable than inferior and ENJs may score surprisingly high on Se, caught between their penchant for deriving meaning and passion for making their dreams realities.

Frasier is sensitive to criticism, which comes from inferior Ti. When he is criticized in a column in the Times with the simple statement “I hate Frasier Crane,” he can’t help but feel as though it is an unwarranted personal attack. Ti is a function based in impartial analysis and criticism of structures or methods, completely independent of people and in conflict with an Extraverted Feeling approach.

Further, after he is sold a false piece of artwork, he is infuriated by the injustice, the blatant lack of regard for ethics. His idealism that people are good, respectful, and care for the well-being of others (Fe-Ni) is shattered. He keeps grasping for some way others and systems may help him—first through calling the police, and then by considering hiring a lawyer. When both Martin and Niles say it isn’t worth it and when Martin tells him that sometimes bad things happen in life and there’s nothing you can do, Frasier has immense trouble coping with the concept. Feeling dominants often run into conflict with the approaches of the Thinking functions, which they perceive to be cold, heartless, and, in the more extreme, immoral.

Another characteristic of Frasier’s inferior Ti can be seen in the second episode, when he is still adjusting to his father and Daphne moving in with him. In the case of an inferior Ti eruption episode, Fe dominants become uncharacteristically cold and withdrawn. In this episode, Frasier is perturbed by all of the ways Martin and Daphne have infiltrated the life he worked to build for himself. He is uncharacteristically in a bad mood, seeking solitude, and short with understanding; his tertiary Se is used defensively to defend his uncharacteristic, self-based need for solitude by saying that since the situation isn’t working out now in the present moment, then there is no hope of it getting better and he should change something about it.

Niles Crane | INFJ

Niles’ function stack is also one that is very readable and makes him a great example of an INFJ.

While he is similar to his older brother, there are some distinct differences. Where Frasier’s typical impulse is to seek out others and talk to them, in need of feedback, Niles is more private and withdrawn, mulling over things internally before externally voicing a conclusion. Where Frasier thrives navigating the social world and being a prominent face in the community, Niles considers his radio show “pop psychiatry” and values a more typical setting where he can see patients one-on-one rather than seeking a broad audience and outward recognition. This is not to say that Extraversion and Introversion have to do with sociability or ability to perform in front of an audience—Niles frequently holds group therapy sessions and workshops etc.—but than IFJs and EFJs tend to differ in their natural preferences. EFJs like to immerse themselves actively in a society and have engagement and involvement. IFJs don’t require this external feedback or engagement, and many times like to help others in more controlled, individual sessions.

One example Niles’ Ni is evident is after he and Frasier see their father having dinner with an old family acquaintance. They remember that her family used to be close to theirs until one summer they had a falling out and were no longer acquainted. The next day, Niles arrives at Frasier’s apartment and announces he had been doing some thinking, wondering why their father was with that woman, so he dug up his old childhood journal and an old photo album their late mother had put together. In the journal around the time they remembered the family friends having a falling out, Niles had written that he had seen his father and her in each other’s arms. In the photo album photos from that summer, there were multiple photos with a woman cut out of them. With these things brought to attention, Niles suggests a theory that their father had an affair. This is Ni—seeing something, mulling it over, connecting separate pieces, and arriving at a conclusion. Frasier first strikes down the accusation, saying there isn’t enough evidence. Again, this is Niles’ Ni—the connections he has made are based on internal thought processes, not totally tangible, but make sense in his linear internal logical deductions based on a couple of pieces of evidence. Ni can derive insight and theory based on minimal things in reality and is not dependent exclusively on what is experienced through the senses.

Another example of Niles’ being his type, and perhaps a good example of how INFJs tend to offer advice in general, can be seen in this conversation between him and Frasier in episode 2.

Frasier: Niles, I don’t know what I’m going to do. Dad and I had another fight. I’m afraid if we stay under the same roof together we’ll do irreparable harm to the relationship we have as it is.

Niles: Well, what are the alternatives?

Frasier: Well, if I didn’t feel so guilty I’d, I’d do what I should have done in the first place: just move dad and Daphne into their own apartment.

Niles: Oh, for goodness sake, Frasier. It hasn’t been that long, you have to give it a chance. And you might remember why you moved him in in the first place.

Frasier: Refresh me.

Niles: You wanted to get closer to dad.

Frasier: I still do. There isn’t anything I’d like more, but he makes it impossible. I can’t read my book, I can’t have my coffee, I can’t have any peace in my own home.

Niles: So what you’re saying is, you want to be closer to dad, but you don’t actually want him around. Ask yourself Frasier, have you tried to sit down and talk to him—I mean, really talk to him?

Frasier: Well, I... Maybe I haven’t done my best. I guess I owe that to the old man, don’t I? Well, ah, thanks for the chat, Niles. You’re a good brother, and a credit to the psychiatric profession.

Niles’ dominant Ni urges Frasier to see past the interpersonal rifts and down to the heart of what matters most, which was Frasier’s original goal: to become closer to his father. Conflict that seems unsolvable through talking it out is a trigger to Fe dominants, and as such, it was hard for Frasier to see past it. Niles’ Ni reminds him of the goal despite this conflict, as Ni as a dominant function is more zoomed out and big-picture; while Niles too uses Fe and is people-focused, he primarily views the world through Ni, which sees things outside of the framework of relationships, whereas Frasier’s dominant Fe was stuck seeing only the relationships and the conflict within them and he forgot the original goal. Additionally, Niles’ use of Ni prompts Frasier to point his own auxiliary Ni at himself and remind himself of his personal responsibility and purpose to the situation with his father.

Niles’ inferior Se is noticed more comically, such as how he doesn’t remember meeting Roz even after he has met her multiple times, nor does he remember where they met. Ni is a very internally-based function, and with inferior Sensation, Ni dominants can have trouble recalling concrete information about their surroundings or people they come into contact with in the external world. Another example of an INJ’s inferior Se can be seen when Niles is gripping shortly after his divorce. He begins to date someone completely opposite from his normal temperament and is impulsive, spontaneous, and doesn’t give any deep thought to his actions or the purpose for these actions. He stays out all night, drinks more, plans a trip with his new girlfriend to another country. It is all very out of character for him, which happens when an INJ is gripping—usually notoriously inert and cerebrally-based, they become active and spontaneous in the outer world, over-indulging in sensory activities.

[toast-the-unknowing]

first lines

tagged by @emmerrr​ and @flightspath​, thanks!

rules: list the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all!). see if there are any patterns. choose your favorite opening line. then tag 10 of your favorite authors!

I’m including lil ficlets because why the heck not. Under the cut for length:

Ronan hadn't meant to drop his hand over the side of the boat. (rascals and scoundrels, villains and knaves)

“Whose turn is it to deal with asshole regulars,” Adam asks, “yours or mine?” (garden ficlet)

“I’m not going to smile.” (photo studio ficlet)

“You’re going to get a sunburn.” (beach ficlet)

Declan goes on the date, because what damn choice does he have? (not to put too fine a point on it)

“You’re not a dragon.” (high fantasy ficlet)

“What’re you in for?“ (arrested ficlet)

“Don’t know why anyone else is even here,” Ronan mutters after the fourth or fifth time he has to dodge to avoid running into someone. (aquarium ficlet)

“You haven’t posted a new video to the channel in three weeks.” (youtube ficlet)

“Would you say Sacrifice is what defined you?” (the mess you left when you went away)

The living room is empty when Adam comes home from work. (the years to come, the years behind)

Ronan gets a text from Adam on Friday afternoon. (we’re making the best of this world)

Ronan would love to say that he's paying attention when he runs into his soulmate, that his words were deliberate and well-chosen. (if love if just a game (then how come it’s no fun))

Gansey is beginning to think the AirBnB was a mistake. (hold me back, I don’t wanna be a drag)

"I found this in your refrigerator." (sailed my ship of safety ‘til I sank it)

“Fuck.” (sings the tune without the words)

They’ve been dating for one week, no matter what Ronan says about it, when Ronan takes him on a tour of the neighborhood. (our hearts are just made out of strings to be pulled)

"Howdy, pilgrim." (talk low, talk slow, and don’t talk too much)

Adam watches Ronan dance around the words I love you for a month before he says them. (like a moonlight mathematician I subtracted my concerns)

It's one of those dreams that tries to trick Ronan into thinking he woke up, but it's not very convincing. (loosen up and lose your mind)

Thoughts:

I was all prepared to go off my last 20 fics period, not limit it to Raven Cycle, and then my last twenty were all Raven Cycle anyway. Though if I hadn’t included the ficlets from that meme a little while back I think my Six of Crows fic would’ve snuck in there

Lots of dialogue without context (or even attributed speaker) as an opening sentence

Lots of SHORT sentences as an opening sentence

Tricking readers into thinking I don’t write torturously long sentences for my own fun with zero consideration of them or of punctuation, I suppose

I was set to blame this trend on that ficlet meme -- I noticed I was doing lots of short dialogue openings and kind of leaned into doing it on purpose -- but the trend continues on into other works, too

I think 16 takes the cake for this category of opening sentence

I actually prefer when the opening sentence manages to pack a lot of context in, versus the “here’s a line of dialogue dropped on you from out of nowhere" -- which, to be clear, I also think is fun, but getting a lot of information in, about who our POV character is, what their emotional state is, what’s happening, what the tone of the piece is going to be, while still being interesting and intriguing, that I think makes for the strongest opening sentences. But, obviously, harder to pull off.

On those merits, I think 5, 14, 17, and 19 are my favorites on the list.

this is already long and I’ve tagged people in something else today so I’m gonna hold off except to say, play if you want to!