#also why am i being taxed for an access code?

[corpiote]

*sniffle* college is a scam *continues to do my coursework*

[tomblomfield]

Taking Risk

I just spent a week talking with some exceptional students from three of the UK's top universities; Cambridge, Oxford and Imperial College. Along with UCL, these British universities represent 4 of the top 10 universities in the world. The US - a country with 5x more people and 8x higher GDP - has the same number of universities in the global top 10.

On these visits, I was struck by the world-class quality of technical talent, especially in AI and biosciences. But I was also struck by something else. After their studies, most of these smart young people wanted to go and work at companies like McKinsey, Goldman Sachs or Google.

I now live in San Francisco and invest in early-stage startups at Y Combinator, and it's striking how undergraduates at top US universities start companies at more than 5x the rate of their British-educated peers. Oxford is ranked 50th in the world, while Cambridge is 61st. Imperial just makes the list at #100. I have been thinking a lot about why this is. The UK certainly doesn't lack the talent or education, and I don't think it's any longer about access to capital.

People like to talk about the role of government incentives, but San Francisco politicians certainly haven't done much to help the startup ecosystem over the last few years, while the UK government has passed a raft of supportive measures.

Instead, I think it's something more deep-rooted - in the UK, the ideas of taking risk and of brazen, commercial ambition are seen as negatives. The American dream is the belief that anyone can be successful if they are smart enough and work hard enough. Whether or not it is the reality for most Americans, Silicon Valley thrives on this optimism.

The US has a positive-sum mindset that business growth will create more wealth and prosperity and that most people overall will benefit as a result. The approach to business in the UK and Europe feels zero-sum. Our instinct is to regulate and tax the technologies that are being pioneered in California, in the misguided belief that it will give us some kind of competitive advantage.

Young people who consider starting businesses are discouraged and the vast majority of our smart, technical graduates take "safe" jobs at prestigious employers. I am trying to figure out why that is.

___

Growing up, every successful adult in my life seemed to be a banker, a lawyer or perhaps a civil engineer, like my father. I didn't know a single person who programmed computers as a job. I taught myself to code entirely from books and the internet in the late 1990s. The pinnacle of my parents' ambition for me was to go to Oxford and study law.

And so I did. While at university, the high-status thing was to work for a prestigious law firm, an investment bank or a management consultancy, and then perhaps move to Private Equity after 3 or 4 years. But while other students were getting summer internships, I launched a startup with two friends. It was an online student marketplace - a bit like eBay - for students. We tried to raise money in the UK in 2006, but found it impossible. One of my cofounders, Kulveer, had a full-time job at Deutsche Bank in London which he left to focus on the startup. His friends were incredulous - they were worried he'd become homeless. My two cofounders eventually got sick of trying to raise money in the UK and moved out to San Francisco. I was too risk-averse to join them - I quit the startup to finish my law degree and then became a management consultant - it seemed like the thing that smart, ambitious students should do. The idea that I could launch a startup instead of getting a "real" job seemed totally implausible.

But in 2011, I turned down a job at McKinsey to start a company, a payments business called GoCardless, with two more friends from university. We managed to get an offer of investment (in the US) just days before my start date at McKinsey, which finally gave me the confidence to choose the startup over a prestigious job offer. My parents were very worried and a friend of my father, who was an investment banker at the time, took me to one side to warn me that this would be the worst decision I ever made. Thirteen years later, GoCardless is worth $2.3bn.

I had a similar experience in 2016, when I was starting Monzo, I had to go through regulatory interviews before I was allowed to work as the CEO of a bank. We hired lawyers and consultants to run mock interviews - and they told me plainly that I was wasting my time. It was inconceivable that the Bank of England would authorise me, a 31 year old who'd never even worked in a bank, to act as the CEO of the UK's newest bank. (It turned out they did.) So much of the UK felt like it was pushing against me as an aspiring entrepreneur. It was like an immune system fighting against a foreign body. The reception I got in the US was dramatically different - people were overwhelmingly encouraging, supportive and helpful. For the benefit of readers who aren't from the UK, I hope it's fair to say that Monzo is now quite successful as well.

___

I don't think I was any smarter or harder working than many of the recent law graduates around me at Oxford. But I probably had an unusual attitude to risk. When we started GoCardless, we were 25 years old, had good degrees, no kids and supportive families. When fundraising was going poorly, we discussed using my parents' garage as an office. McKinsey had told me to contact them if I ever wanted a job in future. I wonder if the offer still stands.

Of course, I benefitted from immense privilege. I had a supportive family whose garage I could have used as an office. I had a good, state-funded education. I lived in a safe, democratic country with free healthcare. And I had a job offer if things didn't work out. And so the downside of the risks we were taking just didn't seem that great.

But there's a pessimism in the UK that often makes people believe they're destined to fail before they start. That it's wrong to even think about being different. Our smartest, most technical young people aspire to work for big companies with prestigious brands, rather than take a risk and start something of their own.

And I still believe the downside risk is small, especially for privileged, smart young people with a great education, a supportive family, and before they accumulate responsibilities like childcare or a mortgage. If you spend a year or two running a startup and it fails, it's not a big deal - the job at Google or McKinsey is still there at the end of it anyway. The potential upside is that you create a product that millions of people use and earn enough money that you never have to work again if you don't want to.

This view is obviously elitist - I'm aware it's not attainable for everyone. But, as a country, we should absolutely want our smartest and hardest working people building very successful companies - these companies are the engines of economic growth. They will employ thousands of people and generate billions in tax revenues. The prosperity that they create will make the entire country wealthier. We need to make our pie bigger, not fight over the economic leftovers of the US. Imagine how different the UK would feel if Google, Microsoft and Facebook were all founded here.

___

When I was talking with many of these smart students this week, many asked me how these American founders get away with all their wild claims. They seem to have limitless ambition and make outlandish claims about their goals - how can they be so sure it will pan out like that? There's always so much uncertainty, especially in scientific research. Aren't they all just bullshitters? Founders in the UK often tell me "I just want to be more realistic," and they pitch their business describing the median expected outcome, which for most startups is failure.

The difference is simple - startup founders in the US imagine the range of possible scenarios and pitch the top one percent outcome. When we were starting Monzo, I said we wanted to build a bank for a billion people around the world. That's a bold ambition, and one it's perhaps unlikely Monzo will meet. Even if we miss that goal, we've still succeeded in building a profitable bank from scratch that has almost 10 million customers.

And it turns out that this approach matches exactly what venture capitalists are looking for. It is an industry based on outlier returns, especially at the earliest stages. Perhaps 70% of investments will fail completely, and another 29% might make a modest return - 1x to 3x the capital invested. But 1% of investments will be worth 1000x what was initially paid. Those 1% of successes easily pay for all the other failures.

On the contrary, many UK investors take an extremely risk-averse view to new business - I lost count of the times that a British investor would ask for me a 3 year cash-flow forecast, and expect the company to break even within that time. UK investors spend too much time trying to mitigate downside risk with all sorts of protective provisions. US venture capital investors are more likely to ask "if this is wildly successful, how big could it be?". The downside of early-stage investing is that you lose 1x your money - it's genuinely not worth worrying much about. The upside is that you make 1000x. This is where you should focus your attention.

___

A thriving tech ecosystem is a virtuous cycle - there's a flywheel effect that takes several revolutions to get up-to-speed. Early pioneers start companies, raise a little money and employ some people. The most successful of these might get acquired or even IPO. The founders get rich and become venture capital investors. The early employees start their own companies or become angel investors. Later employees learn how to scale up these businesses and use their expertise to become the executives of the next wave of successful growth-stage startups.

Skype was a great early example of this - Niklas Zenstrom, the co-founder, launched the VC Atomico. Early employees of Skype started Transferwise or became seed investors at funds like Passion Capital, which invested in both GoCardless and Monzo. Alumni of those two companies have created more than 30 startups between them. Matt Robinson, my cofounder at GoCardless, was one of the UK's most prolific angel investors, before recently becoming a Partner at Accel, one of the top VCs in the world. Relative to 15 or 20 years ago, the UK tech ecosystem is flourishing - our flywheel is starting to accelerate. Silicon Valley has just had a 50 year head start.

There is no longer a shortage of capital for great founders in the UK (although most of the capital still comes from overseas investors). I just believe that people with the highest potential aren't choosing to launch companies, and I want that to change.

___

I don’t think the world is prepared for the tidal wave of technological change that’s about to hit over the next handful of years. Primarily because of the advances in AI, companies are being started this year that are going to transform entire industries over the next decade.

It doesn't seem hyperbolic to say that we should expect to see very significant breakthroughs in quantum computers, nuclear fusion, self-driving vehicles, space exploration and drug discovery in the next 10 or 20 years. I think we are about to enter the biggest period of transformation humanity has ever seen.

Instead of taking safe, well-paying jobs at Goldman Sachs or McKinsey, our young people should take the lead as the world is being rebuilt around us.

[ledenews]

FOIA Request – City of Moundsville WV, RE: OVRTA Bus Levy

The following content represents the Freedom of Information Request that has been emailed to the City Manager of the City of Moundsville, and also to the City Clerk, concerning access to public information connected to the recent Council vote on the proposed OVRTA busy levy. This communication was delayed by one week out of respect for the summer vacation taken last week by the City Manager. This Request follows the emails I've sent to Moundsville Council members Randy Chamberlian, Judy Hunt, Eugene Saunders, and David Wood on June 23rd. In those notes, I asked each member to explain their reasons for voting against placing the proposed busy levy on the November 2024 ballot. Not a single reply has been received. So, please find below my FOIA Request that represents a continued search for those answers. July 15, 2024 To: Rick Healy, City Manager - City of Moundsville - rhealy@cityofmoundsville.com Sondra Hewitt, City Clerk - City of Moundsville - shewitt@cityofmoundsville.com Administrators: This is a Request under the Freedom of Information Act, and I respectfully request answers to the following questions as well as the list of information below. I, of course, am willing to pay for any costs associated with answering and compiling the information. I also request a returned email to let me know you have received this correspondence since I have not experienced much recent success with contacting four particular members of City Council. Please note that when I refer to “the council members,” I am referring to members Randy Chamberlian, Judy Hunt, Eugene Saunders, and David Wood. Questions: One Dating back to October 2023, did any of “the council members” request additional information involving the property bus levy for the City of Moundsville, including but not limited to: Property taxes – average increases citywide and for any individual addresses in Moundsville? The costs to the City associated with placing the proposed bus levy on the November ballot in Moundsville? Projected use/ridership numbers of the proposed bus service if approved by 60 percent of Moundsville voters IF a majority of the City’s councilors voted in favor of ballot placement? Clarification on the process per state code for the proposed bus levy and its possible ballot placement? Two Did any of “the council members” communicate to either of you their reasons for opposing the proposed OVRTA bus levy being placed on the November 2024 ballot in Moundsville? If so, what were those reasons? Three Which of “the council members” use their City of Moundsville email accounts, and which do not? Requested Information: Copies of emails between you and “the council members” that contain communication that pertained to the proposed bus levy. Copies of the information mailed or emailed to any of “the council members” that involved information that pertained to the proposed bus levy. Copies of Council Meeting minutes that contain public discussion that pertained to the proposed bus levy. Thank you for your time, and if you have questions or need additional information, please contact me using my email address. Steve Novotney, Journalist LEDE News & “Novotney Now” on River Talk Radio 100.1FM https://ledenews.com/novotney-nothing-but-silence-from-moundsvilles-elected-officials https://ledenews.com/novotney-moundsville-busy-levy-killed-in-moundsville-but-why https://ledenews.com/an-open-letter-to-could-be-bus-levy-voters-in-moundsville Read the full article

[autumnmsu]

CH. 14 YOUR TURN FIELDWORK

Making the State Real

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Food

I ate my first meal of the day at 1:20 pm on November 28th and I was eating leftovers from thanksgiving dinner. So, they didn’t have any presence from the state but I’m sure the ingredients were prepared a certain way because of the state regulations. Like the turkey I ate you have to refrigerate it and can’t leave it sitting out all day and become warm. Or with canned goods the state adds preservatives into them to make them last longer. I also work in a restaurant so I know that the state has codes/rules on how things are supposed to be run. Like you have to have a clean environment and have to pass a test of how the restaurant is run. And the state doesn’t have many rules from what I know on how trash is exposed. They just come pick it up for us using the trash people. 

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People

 When I go to a store I notice that the employees are wearing uniforms and act a certain professional way because of where they work. And because of that they provide a service of helping me out and checking out any items I need. And I would say I really don’t know how many employees I expected when shopping or going anywhere but I would say there were a lot of helpful employees that were very kind and helpful.

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Transportation

 At around 9:30 am on Monday November 28th I left the house for school and drove there in a car. When riding around you tend to notice that you have to follow many laws and rules to be able to drive that the state makes. I’ve also seen that the state had put up more cameras in certain areas to regulate drivers to follow the law. There's also this one intersection where I live that is either having the roads redone or they are fixing a problem, but it's taking forever. But it’s nice to know that our tax money is going to something useful. 

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School

 I had class at 2:00 pm today November 28th, and I started to think about why I came to this school, and because it’s the only school that has my program for a bachelor degree. And because of that it will be a lot of money, and even though I have a grant that still won’t be enough money. So, I applied for financial aid and unfortunately I don’t know if I will qualify for aid. And I'm pretty sure the state provides many scholarships, grants, and loans for the students who qualify at Morgan. 

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Environment

 I was on my phone sometime in the afternoon and saw that South Korea tends to have bad air pollution sometimes. And that made me think about the environment in which I live, and how I’m blessed to have purified water and decent air quality. And some things the state does by regulating the people to be more conscious of the environment is by getting rid of plastic bags at grocery stores. But they also don’t do enough sometimes because they are still not regulating how much pollution is being put into the air and how we are disposing of things and creating too many landfills.

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Infrastructure

The state supports my needs by providing safe drinking water for me in the area I live in and for that I do have to pay money and the same with energy/ electricity. The state provides safety by using police officers and the military to protect us and come to us if there is a problem, and also by having that accessible to almost everyone for most of the time. They also provide ways to get rid of our trash which is either going to a dumpster and getting picked up by them or them coming directly to our house to get it. They also clean the roads for us by using our tax dollars, and one example of that is during the winter they come and get rid of the roads of snow when it snows a lot. 

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Public Agencies

 The grocery store is a public agency that helps me provide food for myself and my family. The police department and fire department provides safety and useful help when in a bad situation and it’s a state agency. And a federal agency that also protects me from real bigger issues is the military. 

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Social Life

The state does regulate marriages, for example the act of same sex marriages just became legal not to long ago. We also had a regulation on interracial marriages/relationships in America. Some other things the state regulates is that you have to be 21 or older to drink alcohol and you have to be like 15 and 9 months to be able to start driving. And because of these age restrictions I'm not allowed to do some things even though I’m legally an adult, like drinking and smoking.

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Media

The state does regulate what is shown on the media but it’s not too extreme like in some other countries. Like you can’t have inappropriate things on some media platform, for example when they’re cussing on award show performances they have to bleep them out or use a different word.

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Absence

I feel like the state is absent on how they treat black people in this country. And because they treat us so terribly it can be detrimental to our existence in this country. And if they could strengthen their laws, regulations, and punishments, me and other fellow black people would feel a lot more safer than before. This can shape a better and safer world if we were treated equally with others.

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[yuvon-writes-letters]

Hey guys :)

Maybe I'm going chronological for one time, so I can sort my thoughts easier.

Yeah, Goldie's much mire active than I would've thought, too. But they did all those things to keep me alive and kind of save, since we still don't know who they are exactly working against. (I mean, we don't know who Goldie exactly is either, but you get my point)

Honestly, I am pretty sure the TSB timeline is continuing, at least if my theory that Goldie just set me back in an alternate timeline is true. In this case I feel sorry for TSB, though..Extremely sorry. He still was 'my' Jake back then, even though he acted weird in the end (maybe was manipulated by entities). I mean, if what he wrote was true he went with authorities. And in the end..this could've been his downfall.

And yeah, maybe I'm not exactly safe, but I just have to go back. If I go, and if I lose my job, I have some things to sort out. And Jake luckily agreed with me that clearing up my desk isn't the worst thing I can do before leaving. We're still thinking about a location, which I could luckily deside myself. Max agreed on that. Even though he still has some doubts. (I mean, of course...His cousin opened the door with bruises all over her face.) He did promise to not ask any questions until I feel ready, though. That gives myself and Jake some time to figure that out.

And also, Jake is right! We have three Jakes and three smart people. YUVON. And of course Goldie, like you said Yu :) And some information about the previous timeline. (And that was it with being chronological)

So yeah, like I said, Max and I'll go. And I also think we can be pretty certain now that the message came from Goldie not the MWAF (which is relieving). I saw the messages and they didn't make Jake the bad guy. I honestly just don't think I can quote them yet. (They're too good, but I probably start daydreaming if I do) But they talk about Jake being an important part of my life and my heart and Max protecting me when he cannot. My dear cousin jumped to conclusions when he saw my bruised face. About Max' phone...I'll probably throw it in a river or something if he brings it with him. I told him not to, also because of Jake (he's not only worried about the MWAF apparently...He didn't exactly say it out loud, but I think it's pretty obvious) but he loves this device.

And I emphasize with you about the being kidnapped thing, you'll manage it, I know it :) And if I need to jump dimensions and box some sense into your Crow-Crew xD

No but for real, you can do that. I know it :)

Jake, find a good point in time to talk to her. But do it :)

Otherwise, I still think the 'underlying desire' theory is a possibility! But, like always in the moment, we could be wrong.

As for my stasis, I really do not wish to talk to more people who think I've been kidnapped. And I am a bit scared that could somehow lead to either them or me being in more danger again. But for now we have to wait.

I for now will pack some important things and paper & pens xD I don't want to leave y'all behind :P

Liska🐾🔥

[A screenshot is glued to the back of the letter and the quick sentence "Jake wants to talk to Jake" is written above]

Hello Jake, it is a pleasure to meet you. I am not quite sure in which way Liska will handle giving you my message, but she promised me to not read it for now.

I don't know whether she told you before or not, but as far as I am concerned she realised I am not only worried about the MWAF chasing her.

With me breaking out of this stasis I am sure that my followers aren't that far behind. And I know you can't do anything from where you are, but cross checking way to protect her doesn't seem to bad to me. Especially since we are similar but still fairly different from each other. At least it seems like that from what I have read.

For my part, I recently improved and updated Nym-OS which allows me access to Liskas whereabouts. If Yuvon should read this, she knows and agrees to it.

Still I am yet stuck on one little detail: I am trying to help Nym-OS in counterattacking. So, even though I am sure you already knoe this yourself, Nym-OS gets the ability to access location of the people attacking Liskas phone. I am almost done with that, so we are able to see a bit easier if and where people are that could be a danger.

Do you have any other ideas for ways I could help? Or even improve what I am doing momentarily. I wouldn't normally ask this since I know and trust my skills, but I think that this is fairly different from a 'normal situation'.

~ Jake

Lis,

Um. I don't know if you've seen the newest person to send in a letter, but we now have an issue.

Jessy, if you're reading this, I was sort of trying to avoid talking about this right away but I'm sort of trapped in a weird place, and Jake's here too because I'm a dumbass. I did not, so you know, let him read your letter or my reply. I figured you wouldn't want that. Sorry for dancing around the issue earlier :/ But at least you can get a good sample of the complete insanity we go through on the regular now!

Yeah... you're getting thrown into the deep end right now, aren't you. Sorry. There's no way to ease into this. You should probably either stop reading these entirely or start reading the letters from the beginning, so this will all at least make some sense. The first letter should start with the words "To whoever reads this," just so you know you get the right one.

Back to you, Lis. Yeah, I feel pretty bad for TSB Jake too. I honestly can't imagine being in his position right now.

Alright. So, you can choose the place. Great! There's way less chance of you being caught that way...

Tragedies just seem to be happening to all us Duskwood detectives, recently, don't they? Rai is chronically overworked and barely has time to sleep, I'm stuck in this hellhole and I've been forgotten by most everyone, you were shot, and poor Matt died and... well.

I never knew him, but I feel really bad for him :(

You could give Max half the truth. Tell him you have a stalker, and he's starting to get physical. Jake has been trying to help you get away from the asshole. It's not even a lie, just... not the full truth. Because. You know. The whole truth is completely fucking insane.

Writing to Jessy just put into perspective how insane everything is, I think. Gimme a sec.

Oh, fuck. My Jessy just texted me. Great timing.

Jeez that whole thing with me leaving myself out was just a joke XD If I knew you and Jake would take it so seriously, I'd never have said anything. I'll steer clear from now on.

Yeah, okay, definitely Goldie. That makes way more sense. I don't think you have to be quite so drastic as destroying the phone. Just get him to leave it at home for the trip.

Ahaha, thanks. I don't think that's necessary, though. Actually, seeing future!Jessy's perspective has caused a bit of a paradigm shift. I think I might need to reconsider what all to tell and not to tell the Crow Crew. I just sort of default to keeping things secret, now, but you've seen how well that worked for me with you and Rai, and with Jake.

Again, you probably should wait for them to contact you first, but you WILL need to talk to them when that happens. What you say to them and what you don't is up to you.

Pack a couple different pens XD We're all a bit long-winded.

That's all from me :)

(The handwriting changes to Jake's.) Hallo, Lis.

Yuvon refuses to tell me what precisely she means about Jessica. Was she somehow contacted by an alternate version of Jessica? If so, how?

I am glad it was Goldie who contacted Max. Yuvon's suggestion for an excuse seems a good one, as there are far less things to remember that way. You simply need to oversimplify everything.

I do not, unfortunately, entirely believe that Yuvon was joking when she made that comment, based on previous comments and her ongoing guilt. I can't understand sometimes why she feels the need to lie so much. It is difficult for me to read people, much less her.

I will speak to her eventually. Early tomorrow, perhaps, if nothing else rears its head. Yuvon looks tired, and I am also admittedly not at my peak. I sincerely hope she does not wake up as early as she does every single day. It may get somewhat taxing, what with the lack of coffee here.

I think that is all from me to you, Lis. If you would kindly find a way to send the next section to my counterpart without looking at it, it would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you :)

—Jake and Yuvon

Jake,

It is a pleasure to meet you as well, despite the unusual circumstances.

That our pursuers may be freed from the stasis is a logical conclusion. Seeing as the last known location I had on them in my universe was approximately five hundred miles from Duskwood, they will likely be some of the first to free themselves from the stasis. I do not believe I need to warn you that time is of the essence.

It seems as if I am a small distance ahead of you in the development of countermeasures, perhaps because I have had more linear time to develop them. If you are where I think you are at in the development, you likely have or will soon hit a bug you cannot pin down that makes the pinpointing mechanism simply refuse to work at all. Presuming your and my version of NYM-0S are similar enough, the issue should lie in the public bool set in line 132 of the third part of the targeting script, the script that decides what constitutes a target; you have it defaulted to "false" where it should default to "true".

As for additional countermeasures: I was attempting to work on a rudimentary automated system of pattern detection when I was brought here. Essentially, its function would be such that it would be able to triangulate using the locator features already installed to find a rough estimate of where their headquarters might be. However, I have not found any way thus far to eliminate outliers, and as such the feature is currently next to useless. I am no longer able to work on the code, but perhaps you will have more luck than I did.

That is all I can think of for the moment on that subject. However, I have an odd theory on what may be part of the reason we vary so. If you have a moment to spare, please answer me this:

When I was very young, back when Mother was still around, she took me to a doctor for odd behaviors. This included not looking people in the eyes, but there was a list. I was given a diagnosis; if you had the same experience, you should likely know which one.

Did you have this experience? If so, please prove it by stating what the diagnosis was.

Do not worry if you do not know what I am talking about; I would rather you did not guess. Simply state that you don't know. It will confirm my theory.

Good luck with your pursuers.

—Jake

(The letter tucks itself in the paper clip with the others.)

[worryinglyinnocent]

Fic: The Captain

AU-gust Day Ten: Pirates AU Fandom: Once Upon A Time Pairing: Rumbelle

Rated: T

Summary: When her ship is attacked by pirates, Lady Isabelle French strikes a deal with the fearsome Captain Gold. As time passes, however, she finds that he’s not as fearsome as his reputation makes out.

Note: This fic is much longer than the other AU-gust fics as it was begun several years ago and was originally intended as a multi-chapter. It’s been slimmed down considerably, but it still ended up getting away from me.

The Captain

When Lady Isabelle French had first set out on the Avonlea’s maiden voyage from Southampton to the West Indies, she had not reckoned on encountering anything more deadly than mind-numbing boredom. She knew that the seas around Port Royal, the Avonlea’s destination, were notoriously rife with piracy, but since Belle had made it through the entirety of her life thus far without anything remotely interesting happening to her, she had resigned herself to a voyage completely bereft of excitement. 

Now, looking around the small and incredibly untidy cabin that she was trapped in, she knew that dreaming of adventure had been incredibly foolish, and she was not going to do it again. 

The crew of the Avonlea had been jumpy from the moment that they had entered the straits that would lead them to Port Royal, but Belle had paid them no real heed - sailors were always superstitious, and if there were pirates around, then it made sense for them to be on their guard. She had heard the nervous whispers around the deck hands that the infamous ship the Spindle had been sighted in these parts, and the ruthless Captain Gold was on the hunt again. 

She had only started paying the melodramatic stories of Gold’s notoriety any mind when a shadow had fallen across the porthole of her cabin at the same time as a cacophony had broken out on deck above her. Looking up out of the window, she found herself face to face with brass letters on a pitch-black hull: Spindle. 

The next few minutes were all a blur. She’d heard the Avonlea’s captain give the order to repel boarders, and then she’d hidden under the bedclothes with her fingers in her ears as the sounds and screams of a fight broke out on deck. 

She’d still been in that position when two of the pirates had burst into her cabin looking for more loot. Belle had done the only thing that she could think of short of throwing a teapot at them, and she had invoked parley. Whether it had saved her life or not, she didn’t yet know, but at least she was safe for the moment.

That was how she had found herself on board the Spindle, standing in Captain Gold’s cabin and waiting for the man himself to arrive, wondering what would become of her once she met him face to face. Still, although she was overwhelmed by fear, Belle was not going to let it break her. Do the brave thing, and bravery would follow. She wasn’t sure how brave her brave thing was, but it had to be worth a shot. 

There were voices outside the door, and Belle heard the huge, silent man who had been assigned as her guard being dismissed. 

“Thank you, Dove, you may go now. Mr Nolan is dividing the spoils in his office, make sure you claim your share.”

The door opened, and Belle saw the famous Captain Gold in the flesh. 

She had heard many stories about him, all of them with overblown and yet extremely poetic descriptions of his horrific appearance, akin to the devil himself. She wasn’t prepared for a small, slim man with a weather worn but still quite handsome face, and greying hair curling at his collar. He looked altogether too civilised and sensible to be a pirate.

The man who accompanied him must have been his first mate, Milliner. Legend had it that Gold had shot Milliner down from the noose and he still bore the scars from the rope around his neck, but he was currently wearing a slightly worse-for-wear cravat and Belle could not see the veracity of the rumours.

“So, this is our unexpected guest.” Gold sat down behind the desk - half-buried in maps and other papers - and indicated for Belle to take a seat on the bed. “Do sit down, I won’t bite.”

Belle did as bid, trying to make herself comfortable on a surface that was also covered in papers and bric-a-brac. Reaching underneath her to move something particularly painful from jabbing into her thigh, she pulled out a pistol and looked over at Gold, raising an eyebrow. 

He sighed. “Mr Milliner, if you please.”

Milliner took the pistol from her. It turned out not to be loaded, which was probably why Gold had not been too concerned about her potentially pointing it at him, but Belle wouldn’t have had the first clue how to fire it even if it had been live. 

“So, let’s start with the basics. What’s your name, dearie?”

“Belle. Lady Isabelle French.”

“French, eh? Not related to Lord Maurice French, Collector of Port Royal and thorn in the side of all pirates, by any chance?”

“He is my father.” Belle took a deep breath. “I know that if you were to hold me for ransom at Port Royal, he would pay a hefty sum for my safety.”

Gold scoffed. “Would he really, now? Tax men do not part from their money very easily, I am told.”

Belle bristled at the insinuation that her father would not want to rescue her, but in the back of her mind, she had to concede that he did not have that large a personal fortune and most of the funds he had access to were indeed taxes and not his to use as ransom money.

“If he won’t, then my fiancé will,” she said eventually. “I am engaged to be married to Captain Gaston Chevalier of the East India Trading Company.”

Gold smiled., and Belle caught a glimpse of the yellow metal in his mouth. 

“I like you, Lady Isabelle,” he said. “You come with a clear head and a mind to negotiate a deal. I’ve known lifelong seafarers with less pluck and courage than you. Very well. We’ll do it your way. Ransom at Port Royal. We should arrive in three days’ time.” He paused, and his expression hardened a little, although his dark brown eyes retained a hint of amusement. 

“I don’t allow sightseers on my ship, Lady Isabelle, and I can think of better things for you to do than wallow in the brig until we reach our destination. Besides, the ship’s surgeon is already in there for drunkenness. You will have to work your way to Port Royal. Mr Milliner, please find someone to break her in and show her the ropes. Red and Swan would be best if you can find them.”

“Aye, Captain.” Milliner left the cabin and Gold stood a moment later.

“You have nothing to fear, my dear. Whilst you are on the ship, you are under my protection. Welcome to the Spindle.”

He too left the room, and Belle was not quite mollified by his words. How exactly did he expect her to earn her keep, and what would this ‘breaking in’ by the mysterious Red and Swan entail?

She took a deep breath and pushed down her fear. Pirates had a code of honour after all, and whilst she didn’t know what it might be, she had to trust that Gold and his crew would stick to it. They had respected her parley, so she hoped she was in good stead. 

Belle’s fears were put somewhat to rest when she heard a pair of distinctly female voices outside the door.

“…I think that red beard’s got lice, we’re going to have to stop using it.”

“Don’t you dare mention lice aboard this ship!”

Belle raised an eyebrow but quickly composed herself when the door opened again, and a couple of ladies entered the cabin.

“So, you must be the temporary new recruit.” The taller of the two women, dirty red ribbons woven into her dark hair, looked Belle up and down and gave a nod of appraisal. “Well, you certainly impressed the captain, so we’ll give you the benefit of the doubt.”

“You can’t live on a working pirate ship looking like that, though.” The other woman, blonde, handed Belle a pile of rough cloth that turned out to be a shirt, jacket and trousers much like they were wearing themselves. She held out a hand. “Emma Swan, and this is Ruby, although everyone calls her Red, for hopefully obvious reasons. The captain’s sent us to break you in to life on the ship gently, show you the ropes.”

“Literally, in fact,” Red mused. “You won’t be with us for all that long, so we’ll probably just pop you in the galley with Leroy. He’ll be glad of some company down there, and as long as you can peel a potato and don’t touch any of his pots, you’ll get on fine.”

To say that Belle was a little overwhelmed by everything that had happened in the last few minutes would be an understatement, but she took in all in her stride, changing out of her dress and into the much more practical clothing provided. Red and Emma took her on a whistle-stop tour of the ship, showing her all the ropes to mind out for to avoid her being accidentally hoisted into the air by her ankles, and she was introduced to so many people that she instantly forgot all their names, apart from Dove, the silent giant who had guarded her, and Leroy, the ship’s cook. Although nicknamed Grumpy by the rest of the crew, he had warmed to her quickly and Belle was soon at work peeling potatoes, just as Red had predicted.

The next couple of days passed in a dream-like blur; Belle had to keep pinching herself to make sure that she wasn’t in fact dreaming. When she wasn’t helping Leroy in the galley, Red and Emma were giving her sword-fighting lessons on the deck or teaching her how to climb the rigging. For all she was only going to be staying with them until they reached Port Royal and could ransom her, they were certainly serious about initiating her into the life of a pirate. Belle was surprised to find how much she enjoyed it. It was a tiring time; she had been a lady of leisure just two days before and she wasn’t at all used to this much exertion, but she felt a sense of satisfaction when she collapsed into her hammock at the end of the day.

She didn’t see all that much of Captain Gold during her time on the ship, but then, she had not expected to. He was the captain after all, and in the grander scheme of things, she ranked lowest on the pecking order.

“May I join you?”

Belle was pulled from her reflections by the very object of them, and she turned to see Gold standing behind her on the forecastle. Red and Emma had the watch tonight, and Belle had come out onto deck with them, unable to sleep knowing that by this time next day, they would have reached Port Royal and she would be back in the safety of her own bed on solid ground, reunited with her father and having met her fiancé for the first time. She sighed at that thought. The engagement had been arranged between Lord French and Captain Chevalier and she hadn’t had all that much say in it, but she knew that it was the best thing for both their families, and it would strengthen her father’s position in Port Royal.

“Be my guest.”

Gold came and sat beside her.

“Not long now,” he said. “I’m sure you’re eager to get back to your normal life.”

Belle nodded, but she didn’t say anything, and Gold picked up on her reticence.

“Perhaps not quite as eager as you think you should be?”

She sighed again. “I guess I hadn’t realised until now just how much of an escape this has been. I’m not sure that it’s the route I would have chosen myself, but it’s only now that I’m thinking about what’s waiting for me at the other end, and I keep thinking that perhaps I wouldn’t mind staying here a bit longer.” She glanced across at Gold, catching the amused smile on his face, and gave an embarrassed cough. “I mean, obviously, you’ll want me out of your hair as soon as possible, having a noblewoman with no seafaring experience working on a ship, I’m more of a liability than anything.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t say that. Leroy’s been singing your praises, you know, and your willingness to get stuck into our way of life hasn’t gone unnoticed. Besides, you’ve met Red and Swan; we don’t subscribe to the ridiculous notion that having a woman on board is bad luck.” He turned his head on one side, questioning. “Surely you want to be reunited with your father and your intended, though?”

Belle shrugged. “I haven’t seen my father for years; he’s been out here in the Caribbean and I’ve been in London. Our relationship is more like an acquaintance than anything else. As for Gaston, well, I can hardly miss a man I’ve never met.”

“You’re engaged to a man you’ve never met?” Gold’s voice sounded incredulous, and Belle could well see why the situation would feel absurd to an outsider. She gave another sigh, explaining the circumstances, and they both fell silent for a moment.

“I still think that you could at least have met the man before everything was set in stone,” Gold said eventually. “He might sound charming on paper, but that can hide all manner of sins.”

“Or virtues,” Belle countered, but she knew that she was not thinking of Gaston anymore. “You never know what’s in a person’s heart until you truly know them.” Here was Gold after all, one of the most feared pirates on the high seas, and so far, he had been a perfect gentleman to her, and from what she could see, to the rest of his crew as well. Certainly, everyone that she had talked to had only good words about him, and when they were all eating together in the evening, Gold was happy to join in with the ribald songs and anecdotes as much as the next man.

“Well, there’s not long to go now.” Gold leaned back against the forecastle railing, staring at the star-studded sky above them. “Do you know anything about the stars, Lady Isabelle?”

“Just call me Belle, please.” She chanced to lean back next to him, following the patterns in the sky. “I’ve read a lot about them, but I daresay I couldn’t navigate by them as well as you can. I know that’s the North Star.”

Belle wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that, looking up at the stars and naming them until the sky began to lighten again, and Belle found her eyelids starting to drop. Beside her, she just about made out Gold’s chuckle.

“I think I’m going to miss you after tomorrow, Belle.”

X

Docking at Port Royal was a flurry of bustle and activity; everyone on the ship except Belle had a role to play and she just stayed out of the way as much as she could, taking refuge in Gold’s cabin. It had been agreed that she would remain aboard the ship until Gold had given the ransom notice to her father, at which point the captain would come back for her and everything would be solved. It was with a heavy heart that she said goodbye to her new friends, and Leroy gave her an uncharacteristic bear hug and told her that she would be welcome in his galley any time if she decided that she wanted to run away and join them again.

She had been pacing up and down the cabin for over two hours before Gold and Milliner came back. The mood that they had left in had turned around completely, and whereas before they had been serious but optimistic, now it was clear that Gold was incandescently furious.

For a moment, Belle was scared. This was definitely the fearsome Captain Gold about whom so many tales had been told, but as she stayed frozen to the spot and Gold resumed the pacing that she had just given up, she quickly realised that she was not at all the object of his ire.

She looked up at Milliner, who was watching the captain with a grim expression.

“What happened?” she asked.

“Let’s just say that it didn’t go well,” Milliner said. “Your father, well…”

Belle’s heart sank. “There’s no need to be tactful, Mr Milliner. You can just say that he refused to pay.”

Milliner nodded. “It’s not so much that he refused, but he’s stalling for time.”

Belle sighed. “I might have known. I’m sorry; I really thought that this would be a good deal.”

Gold stopped his pacing, leaning heavily on his desk. “It’s not your fault,” he said gruffly. “Any daughter would hope that her father would value her more than his money.” He sighed. “We’re unlikely to get an answer out of him tonight, so you might as well go ashore and stretch your legs. You’ll have to stay with a chaperone; I like to think that you’ll uphold your end of the deal, but one can never be too careful in my position.”

Belle nodded. “I understand. Thank you.”

Dove took her ashore in a rowing boat whilst Milliner and Gold stayed aboard to thrash out their next course of action, and the large man handed her over to Leroy’s supervision. Apparently he had been waiting for just such an occurrence.

“Sometimes pessimism pays off,” he said. “Have you been to Port Royal before? Even if you have, I don’t think a fine lady like you will have spent all that much time around the docks. Come on, I’ll take you to our local. Everyone else will be there.”

The local turned out to be a seedy tavern-come-brothel in a dingy side street; but Leroy was correct in surmising that everyone else was there. Belle recognised several members of the Spindle crew in various states of inebriation, including Red and Emma, who waved Leroy and Belle over to join them. Although Belle was definitely out of her depth in the rowdy atmosphere, she trusted the others to keep an eye out for her, and the next few hours were spent in a warm, alcoholic haze, Leroy, Red and Emma all reminiscing about times in Port Royal gone by as they watched Doc Whale, the ship’s surgeon, attempting to get off with three prostitutes at once and miserably failing with all of them.

Suddenly, Red elbowed Emma in the ribs and the two of them made hasty excuses and left the table, going over to the door. Belle watched them go, patting Leroy awake where he had been dozing off.

“What’s going on?”

Belle nodded towards the door, where Red and Emma were in secretive conversation with Gold and Milliner. Occasionally one of them would glance towards her and Leroy, and whilst Belle trusted the pirates for the most part, there was something about their furtiveness that was making her distinctly uneasy.

After a few moments, they left the tavern, and Belle and Leroy looked at each other.

“Is that normal?”

Leroy shrugged. “I’ve got to be honest with you, sister, I’m usually a lot drunker than this on the first evening in Port Royal. I don’t tend to notice what everyone else is up to.” He paused and gave her an amused look. “You want to follow them, don’t you?”

“Well…”

“Hey, I’m game. A bit of mystery beats wasting all my loot in beer. Let’s go before they get too far.”

Thankfully, Red’s ribbons made her fairly easy to spot amongst the bustle in the docks, and Belle and Leroy were able to shadow them through the narrow streets closely enough that they didn’t lose them when the four put hoods up or pulled the brims of hats down. Things were certainly taking a turn for the interesting, and Belle and Leroy continued to follow them until they reached a small boarding house in an out of the way part of town. Red knocked on the door, which was opened by an old woman, peering around the frame cautiously until she saw the identity of her visitors, whereupon she smiled warmly and let them all in.

Belle looked at Leroy again, who shrugged, and together, they moved a little closer so that they could see in through the house’s front window.

It was not well lit inside, but Belle could make out three children in the room, two boys and a girl. She got the shock of her life when the adults entered and the kids scrambled up and ran over to them, the girl to Milliner and the boys to Emma and Gold, respectively. That she was witnessing a parent and child reunion was blindingly obvious.

She didn’t know why the idea of the pirate crew having families off the ship had not occurred to her. Maybe it was because they all acted like a family on board the ship that they seemed contented and self-contained.

“Woah.” Beside her, it was clear that this revelation had come as a shock to Leroy as much as it had to Belle. “Now that’s something I didn’t know. I knew Jeff had a daughter, but I thought she was in Boston. Em and Gold, though…”

Belle moved away from the window, pulling Leroy with her, not wanting to intrude on the private family moment any longer, but as she glanced back over her shoulder, she knew that it was too late; they had been spotted. Gold was looking out at them, his expression unreadable.

X

Belle didn’t know what to expect when Gold summoned her into his cabin the next morning. He was sitting behind his desk as she entered, and he indicated for her to take a seat on the bed just as he had done on their first meeting. The room was marginally tidier than the previous times she had been in there, and at least this time she did not find herself sitting on a gun.

She didn’t say anything; she knew why she was there, and she couldn’t anticipate Gold’s reaction.

At length, he looked up at her, pressing his fingertips together.

“Lady Isabelle, I would appreciate it if what you and Mr Short witnessed last night does not become common knowledge among the rest of the crew.” His voice was level, but there was steel behind it.

“Of course not. I’m sorry to have stuck my nose in.”

Gold gave a wan smile. “I can appreciate that we weren’t behaving in the most salubrious manner, but you have to understand that we live in a cut-throat world on the seas here. We are by no means the only pirates operating in these waters and whilst we are lucky enough to enjoy a position at the top of the order, that won’t be the case forever. We have many rivals who are looking for any weakness to exploit.”

Belled nodded. “I understand. It’s safe with me, you have my word.”

“Thank you.” Gold paused. “My son means the world to me, Lady Isabelle, and there is nothing that I wouldn’t do to keep him safe. The same goes for Miss Swan and Mr Milliner and their children, and for Miss Lucas and her grandmother who kindly keeps watch over our babes when we’re at sea.”

“And that’s just as it should be.” Belle paused, thinking of her own father and his hedging about paying her ransom. “I take it that there’s been no word from Lord French?”

Gold shook his head. “No, I’m sorry.”

“What about Captain Chevalier?”

“He’s not in Port Royal at present, but we’ve sent word to him.”

Belle sighed, staring down at her hands in her lap, and she felt the bed dip as Gold came over and sat beside her. One of his weather-beaten hands hovered over hers, and then chanced to take it. Belle welcomed it, squeezing slightly. It was typically that the man whose hostage she was – however much it might have been her idea to become that hostage – was more concerned for her than her own father was.

There was a knock at the door, and Gold let his hand slip out of Belle’s before he called for whoever was outside to enter.

Milliner opened the door and popped his head around it.

“The Huntress has been spotted coming up on Port Royal,” he said. “She’s riding low and Dove’s contacts on the docks say that she’s carrying gold as well as sugar this time. If we cast off before noon we can intercept her; if not Hook and the Jolly Roger will get her.”

Gold looked over at Belle. “Do you mind your stay with us being extended for another day or so?”

Belle shook her head cautiously. “I… I don’t mind, but I know the Huntress. That’s Gaston’s ship.”

“Oh.” Milliner shrugged. “Maybe we can kill two birds with one stone then. We get your ransom and you get to go home.”

Belle nodded. “I guess so.”

She got the feeling that it wasn’t going to be as easy as that.

X

There was a heavy sense of anticipation in the air as the Spindle drew up close to the Huntress in the waning light of the day. Belle was watching through the porthole of Gold’s cabin, having been instructed in no uncertain terms to stay there unless Gold or Milliner came to get her. Emma and Red were with her, strapping on pistols and cutlasses and preparing to board the ship. Belle was rather alarmed when they tied on false beards as well.

“We prefer the people we’re up against not to know we’re women,” Red explained. “We’re not at Anne Bonny’s level yet.”

Well, at least that explained the strange conversation that they’d been having about beards when Belle had first met them.

They left the cabin and Belle opened the porthole, leaning out as much as she could to get the best view of the proceedings.

Gold was standing on the deck, facing off against Gaston on the other ship. It was the first time that Belle had seen her fiancé in the flesh, and she had to say that her first impression of him was not exactly promising.

“I take it that you got our message,” Gold was saying.

Gaston nodded. “You have my future wife and will let her go for a large sum out of Huntress’s coffers.”

“Indeed. So, dearie, do you agree to our terms?”

Gaston scoffed. “I’m hardly likely to marry her now that she’s been sullied by the likes of filthy pirates like you. You can keep her, Captain Gold. Your crew look like they could do with a ship’s wench.”

There was a moment of complete stillness, the soft waves lapping against the ships hulls and the wood creaking in the wind the only sounds.

Gold’s voice was chilling when he finally spoke again.

“All right, you had your chance. Let’s go, Spindle.”

Belle ducked back inside the portal and threw herself under the desk as the sounds of carnage began above her, the blast of cannon from both sides echoing in her ears as the ship rocked around her. She curled up into a tight ball, pressing her hands over her ears and squeezing her eyes tight shut. She was in the middle of a nightmare, that was all, and any moment now she’d fall out of her hammock in the crew quarters down below and it would all be over. It wasn’t real, it wasn’t happening.

“Belle?”

She had been so caught up in trying to pretend that it was all over that Belle hadn’t realised that it was all over. She opened her eyes, looking up at Gold. He was a bit more dishevelled than when she had last seen him, but he seemed to be unharmed.

“It’s all right, it’s all over now.” He held out a hand to help her up from under the desk. Belle looked around the room to see that Emma, Red, Leroy and Milliner were all there too, all safe and sound, and she was so grateful to see them all in one piece that she flung her arms around Gold in gratitude. He froze in shock before gingerly putting his arms around her.

“It’s over. We’re all safe.”

“Well, some of the guys on the other ship didn’t come off so well,” Leroy said. “It was quite fun seeing Chevalier bobbing around in the ocean after Gold kicked him overboard. You should have seen him, Belle, it was a magnificent moment.”

Belle had to laugh, and she released her hold on Gold, who delivered her to the care of Emma and Red, shooing everyone out of the office so that he could get on with paperwork. If Belle didn’t know better, then she’d say that he’d gone distinctly pink in the cheeks since she hugged him.

X

Night had well and truly fallen by the time everything had been put to rights on Spindle after the battle with Huntress. Belle was standing at the bow, looking out over the calm sea, and she turned on hearing footsteps coming up behind her. It was Gold.

“We’ll drop you off once we return to Port Royal,” he said. “I’m sorry that your plan came to nothing. You’ve got guts, I’ll certainly give you that.”

Belle sighed, staring out over the rail towards the lights of Port Royal in the distance.

“What if I don’t want to be dropped off?”

“Pardon?”

“What if I want to stay?”

She turned to Gold. He was staring at her with an expression that was half disbelief and half desperate hope.

“You want to stay on Spindle?”

Belle nodded. “It’s not like I have much to look forward to in Port Royal, not now my father and Gaston have made it clear where their priorities lie. I might as well stay where I have friends and where I can feel useful.”

“You really want to stay here? With us? With me?”

“Yes.” Belle inched a little closer along the railing. “With you especially.”

Gold just stared at her dumbstruck for a long while, and Belle decided to take the plunge, leaning in to press her lips against his. Just has he had done when she had hugged him earlier, he froze at first, but then he surrendered into the kiss, his hands coming up to cup her face.

“You’ll be very welcome here,” he said once they eventually broke away. “I’m sure that the rest of the crew would be happy for you to stay.”

“And you?” Belle teased.

Gold just kissed her again, and Belle knew that she was looking forward to a happy, if somewhat unexpected, future with the captain.

[transrightsjimin]

im behind on my administration nd freaking out abt medical bills nd just, the privatization of healthcar!! if anyone told you the netherlands has super socialized systems, they’re either a time traveller from the previous century or lying or like... think anything tht isn’t the US is socialist. it’s not. this country is capitalistic nd social programs have been deteriorating for decades bc of this dominant neoliberal as well as fascist mentality in politics, which enforces budget cuts that hurt the working class nd then punishes them for being poor or sick. yes there is insurance, but insurance companies (that you’re required to by law to make use of even if you can’t afford it fully) are a competitive market that keep increasing its prices every year, less and less is insured bc of the privatization of health, this country is a tax haven for multinationals who pay fucking zero or even get donations from the government and ex-students are stuck with loan debt of ten thousands of euros bc of student benefits being turned into loans by liberal parties in the chamber. if i have to see ppl from other countries share these fucking posts praising the NL for being so progressive for legized weed (it rly isn’t??? there are shops where it can be bought w a license but ppl can be stopped on the street for smoking it bc of racial profiling, and owning one weed plant is legal but not using it or cultivating more than one. like cops in helicopters looking for houses tht cultivate weed bc they got dragged in a scheme is everyday reality you know??).

like yes, this is by far not the worst place on earth, even the working class, esp white, are still far more privileged than the working class in other countries, e.g. not needing to fear for war and having access to water or healthcare at least somewhere. and the petit bourgeouis is quite large in this country which is why there might be a disconnect in ppl’s minds when not being able to apply class theory to a local context. but it is this romanticization of a country tht breaks down its social systems, copies a lot of pseudo-science and ‘free market‘ shit from the US, and deals w its own tradition of denying its colonial / racist past and PRESENT (it still has colonies but it isn’t addressed as such??) that gets to people’s heads and justifies any bad processes bc ‘hey, it at least isn’t [insert other country]!!‘.

more personal rants abt bureacuracy bs and healthcare bills under the readmore. im stressed

FUCKING HELL i just found out that the ‘eigen bijdrage‘ (own financial contribution) that comes with this new ADHD medicine (lisdexfetamine) isn’t around €20-25 like the person who prescribed it stated it was (which already is a lot to me considering the first medicine is fully insured) but €105,37 of which i would need to pay €76,80 (i think bc the previous medication of methylfenidaat was affirmed as not effective) for just 30 MEDICINES so ONE MONTH??

the pharmacist i spoke to, sounded like they too found it an absurdly high price nd i asked if the amount would eventually not be needed to be paid anymore after a certain amount of times (which was for example the case with antacids i picked up for my mom nd myself) and they said it didn’t. i was adviced to seek contact with my insurance company so i did and they said p much the same thing about fees being constant, maybe at the most fluctuating a little bit to lower fees in some months but not much. the only good thing is that eigen bijdrage fees can “only” run up to €250 per year bc anything above that is covered by insurance (which is already so?? to me bc you also have eigen risico amount of €385 per year which works p much the same).

so i looked at the website of the ADHD diagnostic / therapy center i’m a patient at and there’s a page about fees for medication and it links to a web page with statement of the brand / pharmaceutical company that makes this lisdexfentamine and it turns out that you CAN send it a request to get payed back the (i think full??) amount that you paid for the medication. my fucking god the fact that the insurance company workers nor pharmacists couldn’t even access that information bc it isn’t communicated is so vile. i considered not taking this medication despite it possibly being one that actually works for me unlike methylfenidaat. i really hope i can get the full amount paid back and that it’s not actually so that there’s more to this the brand won’t tell people who need medication. i’m also just frustrated this shit isn’t covered bc

i have supposedly the best type of insurance at this company nd my parents help me pay for it and all and this medicine nd a bunch of other things STILL aren’t covered by insurance bc the pharmaceutical industry has become so privatized and the ADHD institution i am a patient at has no contract w insurance companies so that’ll be another €250 in 2021.

ALSO i still have this invoice of €91 from my orthodontist bc my splint was broken nd replaced a few months ago, and i want to send the invoice to my insurance to see if they could at least cover part of it. but for that i need a PDF and to download that, i need to enter a code which they would send to my ‘phone number‘ but that one belongs to my parents’ landline(?) phone and to change it, i need to log in but i don’t have an online account bc when i first joined that ortho center i didn’t have all that and so far that was just fine. so now i first need to find a way to make an account or change my phone number to be able to download the invoice PDF and send that to the insurance. goddd.

like i am blessed enough to have parents who keep offering to help me pay my bills but i feel guilty towards them whenever i accept that bc it’s not like they’re rich or anything nd my mom will lose 1 form of income (or already has) nd isn’t at pension age yet bc that’s 67 and she’s 65 so they’re dependant on mainly my dad who overworks on wage barely above minimum, though i do think my mom gets a little bit so that’s a bit of a relief. but urgh i rly don’t want them to pay for so much for me, nd though the municipality doesn’t check my bank account regularly, it can if it suspects fraud nd they do that for the most random reasons so i’m always afraid they will check and see my parents send money and end up witholding welfare benefits for us.

[lovehaswonangelnumbers]

New Post has been published on https://lovehaswonangelnumbers.org/energy-update-full-moon-lunar-eclipse-new-higher-light-consciousness-mandela-effect-changing-timelines/

Energy Update: Full Moon, Lunar Eclipse, New Higher Light Consciousness, Mandela Effect, Changing Timelines

Energy Update: Full Moon, Lunar Eclipse, New Higher Light Consciousness, Mandela Effect, Changing Timelines

By Diane Canfield

Blessings Everyone,

The Full MOON is today and the Lunar Solar Eclipse. We have been receiving many downloads and upgrades since the beginning of this year. You may notice your dreamtime has changed. This has taken place for many of us. No longer are dreams vague and unreal. Now, it’s as if dreams are just as real as our waking life. For instance, in a dream I had recently, I woke up with my arm outstretched because in the dream I was pulling an item off a shelf. I was literally still moving my arm when I woke up ! I have heard reports of others continuing to talk after they are awake, thinking they are still dreaming. For those of us going through this, you will know exactly what I mean, for those not, you may not understand it now but will.

The Full Moon in Cancer and Lunar Eclipse bring in Intense new energies for us to deal with. This is amplified by the Pluto/Saturn Conjunction in Capricorn happening on January 12th. I talked about these things in my lastarticlebut now that the time is upon us, its time to better understand how these energies will affect us.

Remember the Full moon energy usually lasts about 3 days for those sensitive enough to feel it, so it can be with us until next week.. Also the Lunar Eclipse Energy can last longer, so be aware of the emotional Cancer Full Moon and the Lunar Eclipse Energy of transformation and rebirth. With both of these happening at the same time, we are in a powerhouse of energy.

January 12th Saturn/Pluto 22 degrees in Capricorn 

With Saturn and Pluto both at the same degrees in Capricorn, Higher Consciousness of light now becomes accessible to many.   Decisions will become easier and you will see things more clearly where as in the past they may have been muddled.

Look to accept more responsibility and expect others to do the same. Responsibility and Integrity are two key factors in the sign of Capricorn and we will all be greatly affected by these all year long. With this comes more insight. The insight will now come without having to struggle to find it. You will know exactly what you have to do and why you need to do it.

Look for changes to happen and to happen quickly. This will be an entire year of rebirth and refocus. Many peoples lives will completely change. They may change partners and move locations. Look for this aspects within yourself when they occur.

With the Full Moon, the Lunar Eclipse and the Saturn/Pluto Conjunction in Capricorn all happening this week we are really in for a roller coaster of changes. Be aware of the New Energies of Higher Light coming in and do everything you can to integrate them into your being. More about this later- about exactly how to do it.

Spaceweather 

The past few days we have been experiencing high solar wind and small geomagnetic storms. This has led to little sleep and interrupted sleep. I am also feeling crown chakra activations for this entire past week. Crown chakra activations feel like goosebumps on one side of the head and can last for up to minute when they occur.

Mandela Effect

One of the newest Mandela effects is from the song Billie Jean by Micheal Jackson. There is a line in the song that says “Mama always told me”, it’s now been changed to “Motheralways told me.” Be aware the Mandela effect continues now day in and day out with new ones constantly showing up. There are now too many for me to keep up with. What does this mean? It means we are now changing timelines so fast, there is no way to keep up with it. This all plays into the Intense energies that are now occurring.

Changing Timelines 

During High solar winds and Solar storms, earthquakes and other earth anomalies can take place. Watch for these as they happen as there is a connection between changing timelines and these space weather occurrences.I have noticed this connection for years now but have not reported much on it. This will also include all earth changes such as fires, floods,  etc. This is a sign of the earths evolvement.

My Higher Dimensional Experiences 

I was in my backyard relaxing and saw a portal open up a few yards from me. It looked like a train that was going high speed. It flashed before my eyes and then disappeared. As I always see things, objects and beings from other dimensions, this kind of thing does not surprise me, I take notice, observe and then report when I think it can help others. I am pretty calm about whatever I see because this has been taking place since I was a child.

Also I am seeing more beings more often. Meaning I have always seen beings from other dimensions but now they seem closer and there are more of them. My wish is for more in the spiritual community to be able to see beings, objects and things from other dimensions. This can immediately propel someone into higher dimensional consciousness.

Bliss has been coming in all of this week! I have felt fantastic and can feel more LOVE entering the planet through light codes that keep on coming !

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[zerohour1974]

The Grumpy Git Returns 2

Why is the Tech world so fundamentally broken?

Hello readers I’m back after a major hiatus.  What on earth is going on in the world of technology.  It’s all going to hell.

You might think what the hell am I on about.  It seems things in the industry are completely broken and for all the complaints out there no one seems to do anything about it.

Here are just a few examples...

1) Apple releases Mac Pro with a basic price tag of £5000

What on earth, I would understand such a price point if this was an amazing all singing all dancing machine, but its not.  The basic system is an i5 system.  Seriously then everything else can be upgraded by Apple or exclusive dealers or it invalidates your warranty and the machine locks you out using the T2 security chip.

Now Apple have been on shaky ground regarding tech for a number of years which problems such as lowering sales of iPhones because by the time they release them they have already been superseded by the competition.

Apple used to be seen as the innovative company of the world, the kings of aesthetic and cool.  Now even the hipsters of the world are thinking Apple products are too expensive and not really giving much to the world.

It doesn’t help that every MacOS version is now more like iOS and they are locking you further and further into the Apple Garden.  What i mean by that is blocking anything that is not in the Apple Play Store, not supporting hardware (Nvidia graphics cards, Wi-Fi etc.) and now preventing upgrades.  Which is alienating their customers...

No one is going to buy the Mac Pro one because the price is ludicrous.  Two everyone is speculating Apple is going to change to using ARM processors so the whole system is probably about to change.   People got bitten with PPC, only for Apple to switch to Intel and abandon PPC.  So they will not get away with it twice.

Apple admit too being a $1 trillion company but how long will it last considering you are further and further alienating your own customers.    Now don’t get me wrong there will always be a hardcore group of loyal Apple consumers, but you have to wonder is it enough to keep Apple where it stands.

Personally given their listed losses it looks like the bubble is starting to burst.  But equally getting back to the point who seriously believed a £5000 desktop would be seen and thought wow that’s a good idea.  The mind boggles.

A lot of people are now building Hackintosh machines because one its cheaper to do so and two for less money you probably get more power than the Mac Pro.  Crazy.

2) Software companies putting out totally broken games as full releases at full price.

This one is pretty obvious I can site many examples her but of course probably the biggest known was of course Bethesda’s Fallout 76.  Now I’m not going to reiterate its story there has been plenty of coverage about it on YouTube.

Now before anyone starts yes I accept there is Early Access programs on Steam and the likes but they at least admit up front that the item you are purchasing is not the final game and may be subject to change.

However we are seeing more and more companies putting out games that require huge day one updates of several gigabytes.  DLC breaking game elements in major ways and live services either not working or not being able to cope with the loads.

Now I admit I am not a programmer and maybe someone who is in the game will be able to shed a better light, but it seems these major corporations such as EA, Ubisoft, Activision Blizzard and more are making millions off the backs of programmers who are expected to deliver higher and higher standard stuff in less and less time.

These guys are being forced into working extraneous “crunch” hours being put under immense stress and not really seeing much in the way of benefits.  They seem to take a lot of abuse if the programmer refuses.

2019 showed many cases of ex-employees reporting abuse.  Now I know some could be put down to sour grapes but there is a lot to be said about there is no smoke without fire.

It seems many programmers are complaining about their immense pressure to perform.  As I said I’m not a programmer so I can’t really say I know.  They seem to have no representation in their corner to help them such a union and because a lot of them are freelance many corporations see them as disposable.

This to me is ludicrous.  Without these programmers most of these corporations would not have a product to sell and equally wouldn’t exist.  So why treat them like dirt, you are cutting off your nose to spite your face.

Also for all things like Fallout 76 proved for all they released a half arsed game and took controversy.  Not once has someone said that this practice is unacceptable.

If you bought a Television and when you turned it on it showed BBC1 and BBC2 only and the rest was coming later in a software patch update.  You would complain vehemently and take back the television for your money back.

So why can software companies get away with releasing a half finished product.... Which moves us on to...

3) New Linux phones been released unfinished

Linux phones are the latest and “greatest” thing since sliced bread if you believed the hype.  Security conscious phones that don’t report everything about you, kill switches to disable base bands so you can’t be monitored at all times and of course its Linux based so the operating system is free.

All sounds good and hence why Purism Librem 5 and the Pine phone both have had a major interest shown in them.

Given all the concerns raised recently regarding Google and how it uses its data and problems such as the many data leaks of various sites.  Privacy regarding your data is being raised.

Ironically Microsoft who have admitted they are having Windows 10 report back data are not in these investigations.  But hey ho.

However its not the fact its Linux that’s a problem for me.  I like Linux but what i don’t get is this new concept of the phone is taking longer than we thought and people are worried.  SO what we will do is supply you your phone but most of the software doesn’t work but in the next few months we will implement various features to get it working.

They even give them titles such as the Pine Phone Braveheart Edition or the Librem 5 Spring.  Basically a broken p[hone which you have paid money for hoping that eventually it may work.

Once again these phones are hardly cutting edge so even if they do get it working.  Half of the tech is at least a generation back.

Now I understand creating a phone and its OS from scratch is hard work     and such processed take time.  However giving you a shell of a phone and leaving you to wait for the rest is a bit much.

This is similar to the TV but in this case because Linux is open source.  Your TV now only has two channels and they want you to write the next bit of the code to sort the programs out.  They say it’s a learning experience.

I’m waiting for someone to build a house and then if you want any windows, heating or electric you have to have to either build it yourself or wait for an upgrade.  Madness.

4) Live services...

When I started in computing my first machine was a ZX Spectrum 48K it wasn’t amazing but it was a computer.  You bought games, you could program it and it was yours to do with as you pleased.

Modern day systems both in the computing world and console world you are signed into agreements that no matter what the machine is.  The code involved is the property of X company and although you physically own the machine you can not amend it, alter it,  complain about it or they can withdraw your rights to said systems and lock you out.

What? I own a machine but if I do anything beyond your limitations you will sue me.  How did this become a thing.

It was bad enough with Intellectual Copyright bullshit but this is getting ludicrous.

They have since took it one step further in games now several of them will not allow you to play them unless permanently connected to their servers or pay an ongoing subscription fee.

Which equally they can close at a moments notice because they decide they don’t like it and you have no recompense.  How many games have we heard have been just abandoned by their publishers.

Especially in the MMORPG genre.  Games are no longer purchased like tapes with physical medium as now most are download codes in physical cases.  If you actually get a physical DVD you are lucky.

However it doesn’t mean squat if you buy the game and the servers no longer exist.  Several games have managed to allow people to have their own private servers but many of them don’t exist.

How is this allowed to exist.  How are the computer industry allowed to sell products which have no guarantee.  Also why is no one questioning this...

If Valve decide enough was enough, they were sick of being blamed for the controversial games been stuck on its site by asset flippers etc., and decided to close down the service.

Sure they would have to give people notice but beyond that they have no obligation to make sure you have access to the games you bought.  This to me seems a dodgy game.

And with more services such as the Epic Games Store, UPlay, Origin,  and Google Stadia this is only going to get worse.

We need some form of legislation to prevent this from happening.  We are losing more and more data everyday on the internet due to leaks, server closures and companies just going out of business.  Very little of this software and data is being archived so is lost.

This is a problem.  Now I understand people saying it’s my game. But equally you have been paid for said game and now they are saying we cant use it or access it.

Something is fundamentally wrong here.

I could go on with further points such as large corporations closing Software Studios making games and complaining they sold 7 million copies and didn’t sell 10 million copies. Major tech companies refusing to pay taxes but want tax breaks from major governments but that can be the topic for another day.

As I said the tech world is fundamentally broken and needs a shake up.  Why are we paying the price for their inability to sort out their problems.

Until next time ...

[dy1kjxxa-blog]

How can i get Health insurance?

How can i get Health insurance?

Hey looking for advise on how i should go about getting health insurance. I m 18 turning 19 in March my father is passed away and i live with my mother we recently moved to Arizona I m from Massachusetts i knew about mass health but never had to deal with anything due to always being insured by my mother and fathers works. Looking for what i should do Also i do not have a job as of right now I m looking for health insurance so that if i get hurt while doing things such as snowboarding an break a bone or something i don t have to pay a 12,000 bill when i have no money Thank you for any help

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[bountyofbeads]

Democratic divides take center stage at first debate

https://wapo.st/31ZcPzE

SOULESS Trump 😢😭🖕👉“BORING!” he tweeted as the candidates began discussing the deaths of a father and daughter at the border.

Democratic divides take center stage at first debate

By Toluse Olorunnipa and Michael Scherr | Published June 27 at 12:16 AM ET | Washington Post | Posted June 27, 2019 |

Deep divides over health care and economic policy dominated the first Democratic presidential debate Wednesday, as 10 candidates jousted in Miami over the best formula for beating President Trump and fixing the economic struggles of the middle class. 

The result was a prime-time display — the first national event of the election season — showcasing economic and regulatory differences that have riven the Democratic Party, including transformative plans to eliminate private health insurance, fund free college for most Americans, break up giant corporations and impose sharp tax increases on the wealthiest Americans. 

The ambitious slate of proposals highlights the Democrats’ leftward shift, a trend Republicans are seeking to take advantage of by linking the party with socialism and government control. The generally sober event also highlighted one of the key dilemmas that Democrats face in their attempt to oust Trump — a bombastic showman whose name was only occasionally mentioned but whose presence loomed large over the proceedings.

Sen. Elizabeth Warren (Mass.), standing center stage with the most early attention from moderators, drove much of the debate with a passionate defense of disruptive plans that would face long odds of passage in Congress. She framed each of the issues as a question of determination, saying she was willing to fight and take on the “corruption in this system” that had created the problems. 

“We’ve had the laws out there for a long time to be able to fight back. What’s been missing is courage, courage in Washington to take on the giants,” she said. “I want to return government to the people, and that means calling out the names of the monopolists and saying I have the courage to go after them.”

Her rivals were forced to respond, though they avoided taking her on directly, trying to explain their plans as different routes to the same goal. 

“I do get concerned about paying for college for rich kids; I do,” said Sen. Amy Klobuchar (Minn.), a thinly veiled reference to plans supported by Warren to make public colleges free for all Americans.

But the two-hour debate proceeded without a significant viral or humorous moment to rival the kind of spectacle created by Trump during the 2016 debates that were dominated by the real estate developer’s shocking comments, off-color jokes and biting attacks on his rivals.

Trump’s campaign characterized the debate as “the best argument for President Trump’s reelection,” arguing that Democrats were proposing “a radical government takeover of American society that would demolish the American Dream so many are gaining access to under the growing Trump economy.”

Rather than paint a hopeful vision of the nation’s future, the Democrats onstage focused on the grim challenges facing the country — warning of a long list of serious threats to the nation’s well-being, such as corporate power, global warming, the humanitarian crises on the southern border and the growing economic power of China. 

Perhaps seeking to introduce themselves to a national audience, the candidates only rarely addressed one another directly or strayed from well-rehearsed lines.

When Sen. Cory Booker (N.J.) was asked about previous comments criticizing politicians who pledge to break up specific companies — as Warren has — he seemed to shift in Warren’s direction, saying “I don’t think I disagree” that corporate consolidation is a problem.

Former Texas congressman Beto O’Rourke gave his first answer in both Spanish and English, but he struggled to respond directly to the question about how high he would bring the marginal tax rate for the wealthy. He spoke instead about ending gerrymandering while bolstering the Voting Rights Act and same-day voter registration. 

“I would support a tax rate and a tax code that is fair to everyone,” he said, after the question was repeated to him. 

Wednesday’s debate marked the first of 12 scheduled by the Democratic Party, including at least two split over two nights, with 10 more candidates scheduled to appear in Miami on Thursday. Polls show a wide-open race, even as most of the 23 candidates struggle to register even 2 percent support.

Warren was the only candidate to appear polling in double digits, with clear momentum after months of tireless campaigning. Three other candidates, O’Rourke, Klobuchar and Booker, have been struggling to maintain the early expectations of their campaign announcements. Six more, including Rep. Tim Ryan (Ohio), Rep. Tulsi Gabbard (Hawaii) and Washington Gov. Jay Inslee, have found themselves struggling to be noticed in the crowded field. 

But all of the candidates were given a chance to weigh in on the key divides in the party. Only Warren and New York Mayor Bill de Blasio raised their hands when asked whether they would get rid of private health insurance.

“I understand: There are a lot of politicians who say , ‘Oh, it’s just not possible.’ . . .,” Warren said, fully embracing the single-payer health-care plan backed by Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.), who will be onstage Thursday. “What they’re really telling you is that they just won’t fight for it. But health care is a basic human right. And I will fight for it.”

The issue of immigration, an area of relative agreement in the Democratic Party, prompted one of the few fierce exchanges of the night — between the two Texas politicians on the stage. Former housing and urban development secretary Julián Castro sought to draw a contrast with O’Rourke by saying the former congressman opposed repealing part of U.S. immigration law that allows for criminal prosecution of migrants who come to the United States without proper documentation. Castro has called for decriminalizing undocumented immigration, a position Republicans have branded “open borders.”

“I think that you should do your homework on this issue,” Castro said, turning to O’Rourke. “If you did your homework on this issue you would know that we should repeal this section.”

O’Rourke said he favored immigration policies that ended the family separations that have taken place during the Trump administration, and to ensure that migrants seeking asylum are not detained.

For most of the candidates onstage, the debate marked one of only two chances they will have, in addition to the July debates, to spark the interest necessary to get them on the September debate stage, when the polling and donor qualification requirements will dramatically tighten. 

Several candidates made clear attempts to grab and hold the spotlight in the hopes of breaking through. 

At both ends of the stage, de Blasio and former Maryland congressman John Delaney, who poll the lowest, forced their way into the conversation repeatedly, with the former arguing he was the most passionate liberal on the stage and the latter playing the role of the most practical moderate.

“What we are hearing here already in the first round of questions is that battle for the heart and soul of our country,” de Blasio said. “This is supposed to be the party of working people. Yes, we’re supposed to be for a 70 percent tax rate on the wealthy.” 

Delaney responded by calling such ideas unrealistic. “I think we have to do real things to help American workers and the American people. Right?” he said. 

Booker’s strategy in the debate was to repeatedly personalize the issues that were raised. When talking about guns, he spoke about his Newark neighborhood where seven people were recently shot. “I live in a low-income black and brown community,” he said when asked about corporate consolidation. “I see every single day that this economy is not working for average Americans.”

Candidates focused mostly on policy but also spent time attacking Trump for his governing style and his record since taking office in 2017. Trump’s erratic approach to foreign policy came in for blistering attacks.

“I don’t think we should conduct foreign policy in our bathrobe at 5 in the morning,” Klobuchar said.

“This president and his chicken hawk Cabinet have led us to the brink of war with Iran,” Gabbard said. 

“The biggest threat to the security of the United States is Donald Trump,” Inslee said to applause. 

Ryan was one of several candidates who blamed Trump for conditions at the border, where migrants from Central America have been traveling in family groups, overwhelming U.S. facilities meant to house adults. Lawyers visiting some of the facilities have said that children in the facilities were living in squalor without access to basic hygiene items.

For his part, Trump weighed in from Air Force One, where he was en route to the Group of 20 summit in Japan. He focused on technical difficulties that forced NBC to cut to a commercial break when audio problems surfaced.

“.@NBCNews and @MSNBC should be ashamed of themselves for having such a horrible technical breakdown in the middle of the debate,” he tweeted from over the Pacific Ocean.

The president didn’t attack any specific Democrat during the debate, instead focusing on a candidate who was not on the stage.

“Ever since the passage of the Super Predator Crime Bill, pushed hard by @JoeBiden, together with Bill and Crooked Hillary Clinton, which inflicted great pain on many, but especially the African American Community, Democrats have tried and failed to pass Criminal Justice Reform,” Trump tweeted from his presidential plane before the debate even started. “Please ask why THEY failed to the candidates!”

 The president has repeatedly weighed in on the Democratic primary, and he spent part of Wednesday doing the same. His focus has largely been on Biden, who in early polling has been leading Trump in some key states. Biden will join Sanders and eight other Democratic candidates at Thursday’s debate.

On Wednesday, with Biden not on the stage, Trump appeared less interested in the actual substance of the debate.

“BORING!” he tweeted as the candidates began discussing the deaths of a father and daughter at the border.

[sunshinekarliekloss]

3 Minutes With Karlie Kloss

We caught up with the newest face of Estée Lauder on the set of her first shoot with the brand to talk everything from contouring to coding.

There is something about Karlie Kloss that hearkens to the era of the ‘90s supermodel. So much more than a pretty face, these women were household names and changed the game of what it meant to be a model. They walked the highest-fashion runways and appeared in the most aspirational campaigns, yet were somehow also approachable—it felt like they could be your best friend, if only you happened to be in Milan for the same show.

Karlie (we might as well be on a first-name basis, since she’s the next-gen Cindy, Naomi, Christie) is cut from the same cloth. Starting her modeling career in high school, Karlie soon left her hometown of St. Louis, Missouri for New York City and a life in front of the camera. But it’s not all the curated, calculated images you’re used to seeing in magazines—Karlie is an open book and makes it a priority to let fans in on her life, as evidenced by her three-year-old YouTube channel Klossy, where she takes followers everywhere from the everyday (a run and her post-workout routine) to the extravagant (the Oscars red carpet). She also devotes time to giving back: Out of her own curiosity, Karlie enrolled in coding classes and then founded an organization called Kode With Klossy to give young women the same opportunity to learn to code and empower girls to be leaders in tech.

We could go on at length about our newest Global Ambassador and what makes her so incredible, but we’ll let you hear it directly from Karlie herself. Read on for our chat from the set of her first shoot with Estée Lauder, and you’ll no doubt see why she puts the “super” in supermodel.

When did you know that you wanted to be a model? I wouldn't say that I really set out knowing that this would be my career. I was first discovered in a mall in St. Louis, Missouri and at that point I thought I was going to follow in my father’s footsteps to one day become “Dr. Kloss.” I was sure that was my life path, so even when I started my modeling career and started traveling the world and working, I really, for the first few years, thought of it more as an after-school hobby. It wasn’t until I graduated high school and moved to New York that I was like, "Alright, I'm doing this. I'm going to give my all.”

What does it mean to you to be joining Estée Lauder? It's a dream come true. It really is. My entire career, having a beauty contract has been at the top of my bucket list. From the very start, my list of career dreams always included “Cover of American Vogue” and “Estée Lauder beauty contract.” When I was on an airplane commuting between my life as a high school student in St. Louis and my parallel life as a fashion model in NYC, I would journal about my dreams. I have to find that journal that says, "Bucket List: Estée Lauder beauty contract." It's surreal, and I'm really grateful and excited. I'm so honored to be a part of a brand with such a rich legacy. Estée Lauder is the creme de la creme! The advertising images are iconic—but being a part of Estee Lauder to me means so much more. I am so inspired by what this company stands for. The history of the brand, the entrepreneurship of Estée herself, the unparalleled scientific research and commitment to creating the best in class products for women globally. I couldn’t be more proud to be joining the Estée Lauder family.

What is your favorite thing about your job? I'm a really curious person, and I love learning about business and different industries and really getting to understand how things are made and how people see the world. I get to work with such creative people and be around so many people with unique life experiences. My favorite part is the access I have to really brilliant minds, whether it's in fashion, or with photographers, or makeup artists, or on the business side. I love learning about how things are built. I recently met a chemical engineer who had worked with Estée Lauder on product development, and was so fascinated to learn about the science and art behind developing product.

What is the hardest part of your job? Because we live in such a global world, part of the glamour of it is all this travel, but it also can be taxing to be living out of a suitcase all the time, so it's kind of a double-edged sword.

In the midst of all of that, you founded Kode With Klossy, which teaches girls how to code. What inspired you to learn in the first place? I was always interested in math and science growing up and even though my career took me down a different path, that interest and curiosity stayed with me. As my career in fashion progressed, I started to see how technology was transforming my own industry. I took my first coding class because I wanted to understand how the technology that was changing not only my industry, but every industry, worked. After taking that class, I had this “a-ha” moment. There's no limit to what you can build with code, and with access to the learning and incredible teachers, everyone can learn. I started Kode With Klossy in order to provide other young women with the same opportunity to learn to code and empower them with the skills needed to become the next generation of leaders in tech.

Let’s talk about fashion and beauty in the tech space. It seems like beauty can sometimes be seen as a bit more frivolous, while tech is very serious. How do you merge the two worlds? The two worlds have already merged—I actually think beauty and tech sit at this really unique intersection with so much power and opportunity to innovate and be creative. Throughout my own career, I’ve watched the increased emergence of fashion and tech, from the rise of e-commerce and wearable tech to 3D photoshoots. These two worlds will only become more intertwined, which will lead to many more changes and innovations in the industry in the coming years.

I also want to say that beauty is not always about being frivolous or vain. Beauty and fashion allow for self-expression—they have the power to make you feel like your best self by inspiring confidence and individuality, and that should not be undervalued.

Estée had this saying, “Every woman can be beautiful.” And it’s almost like you’re proving the tech equivalent of that with the idea that every woman can code. Every woman can do whatever she wants! And feel beautiful in her own skin. You don't have to be defined by just one thing, and that's what's so exciting about this world that we're living in today. I think the next generation understands that they can be, do, and create anything they dream of. (x)

[lovehaswonangelnumbers]

New Post has been published on https://lovehaswonangelnumbers.org/intuitive-astrology-jupiter-retrograde-2020/

Intuitive Astrology: Jupiter Retrograde 2020

Intuitive Astrology: Jupiter Retrograde 2020

By Forever Conscious 

Jupiter enters its annual retrograde on May 10th to September 13th in the sign of Capricorn.

Jupiter spends a good portion of the year in retrograde, so this is a natural and normal rhythm that we are used to experiencing. Jupiter however, has not been retrograde in the sign of Capricorn in over 12 years, so this is what makes the energy fresh and different.

Jupiter is the planet of abundance. It brings opportunities and helps to expand things so we can see with greater clarity.

Jupiter gives us the gift of being able to see the bigger picture and within that bigger picture, it becomes easier for us to see the how and why of our journey.

When Jupiter enters retrograde, it is not as easy for us to access this bigger picture. Our focus becomes smaller, and we are asked to narrow in on a particular theme or topic of our lives.

Instead of looking at things from a birdseye perspective, we are now being drawn to focus on the smaller details.

Under this energy, we don’t want to spread ourselves too thin or lose sight of what is really important to us.

Think of a beautiful painting for a moment. When we look at the whole painting, it allows us to understand the totality of the work. We can see the entire image and what it represents.

When we take a small section of the painting however, and really study and look at it, we don’t have the whole context. We can only imagine what this small part of the whole may turn out to be.

While our scope to see is limited, our imagination can run wild. We can notice the smallest of things and stretch our minds to visualize what this small section of the painting may represent or be a part of.

When we can finally see the whole painting revealed to us, that small section will make greater sense to us, but it would have also helped to shift and change how we see the picture in its entirety too.

It’s almost like by focusing on this small section of the painting, we develop a special relationship with it. Whether we consciously realize it or not, focusing in on that small piece shifts and changes our understanding of the bigger picture.

By focusing on the smaller details, we have greater awareness and appreciation of the whole.

This is what Jupiter Retrograde energy is like. It encourages us to focus on the smaller details for there is something we can learn and take away from this when we do.

By focusing on the smaller details, we can create a deeper understanding and appreciation for the bigger picture when it is finally revealed to us.

As Jupiter goes retrograde in Capricorn, we may see this play out in areas relating to our ambition, drive, and what it is that we would like to “build” and create in this life.

What do you wish to expand in your life?

Jupiter Retrograde in Capricorn will be helping you to lay the groundwork and to create a solid and firm foundation for the expansion to occur.

How can you create space for this expansion? What practical, methodical steps can you take?

Capricorn is an earth sign and it wants us to put integrity and deliberate thought behind each action we take. It wants us to create a solid, stable foundation so we can climb high.

When Jupiter goes direct again come September, the larger, expanded picture will be revealed and a greater clarity will follow. New opportunities will open up and we will feel like we can spread our focus comfortably.

During this Jupiter Retrograde, we may find ourselves feeling extra tired and lethargic. We may also feel like we have lost our motivation.

This is all part of the process, and a reminder that like all retrograde energy, this is a time to go within.

While our motivation for output may be reduced, it’s important to remember that we are still doing a lot of inner growth during this time.

Inner growth is still work! So be gentle with your moods and try not to allow the voice of shame to creep in.

While you may not be able to make leaps and strides under this energy, know that any effort you put in during this retrograde has potential to blossom in full once Jupiter goes direct again in September.

You may not see the progress for you are only concentrating on the smaller picture, but by appreciating and working with what is in front of you, it will help you to reach further when things expand once again.

Diving Deeper Exercises

1.) Jupiter entered Capricorn back in December 2019. Think back to this time of your life. What themes were coming up for you, specifically around your career, money, or what you felt called to build in your life? Write down whatever stands out to you and know this may be up for a revisit during this retrograde period.

2.) What area of your life would you like to see expand? Under this retrograde, think about the smaller details that can help create a solid ground for expansion. What little things can you focus on in this area of your life? How can you create space for this expansion to occur? What small practical steps can you take right now?

3.) Use the following journal prompts to spark inspiration:

I feel most abundant when…

I can expand my life by…

I feel called to focus on…

I am grateful for…

4.) Think of 3 ways that you can better manage your energy levels. You may also wish to look into what current habits are depleting your energy.

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