#also whoever came up with the name fly for them is so right

[ellecdc]

okay but what about when a puck goes flying wild and hits medic!reader square in the face (talking concussion, wound, blood, bruise, whatever u feel like) and her whole team goes crazy both in terms of protectiveness of her but also confusion bc what do we do without our favourite medic??? (can be in the remus hockey player or pt universe, anything u feel like luv)

is there a bug in my wall? how do you know this is EXACTLY what I've been daydreaming about????? I demand answers! (thank youuuuu for the request)

hockey player!Remus Lupin x team medic!reader who's a real member of the team [2k words]

part 1 | part two | part 3

CW: injury, angry Swedes, writers distaste for her home team (of which she cheers for), Scandinavian's beefing with each other but it's in good fun

Remus was certain the game clock was moving in slow motion, or that whoever was in charge of it forgot to hit play a few times when the play would continue. He needed this game to be over. 

He needed to get you you.

The entire game had been frustratingly slow; both teams scored one goal in the first period, and then nothing happened in the entire second period. A fight broke out at the beginning of the third, but then it seemed like they were back to nothing happening.

That is, until the worst thing happened.

The Leafs were lining up for a goal in the Lion’s zone with a one man advantage due to Fenwick’s tripping penalty. Grönvall, Dearborn, Nadeau, and Potter were on the ice for the penalty kill, blocking shots for Krum with various parts of their bodies that Remus was sure was going to result in wicked bruises.

Matthews had the puck behind the net, sending it up the boards towards Nylander, Nylander passed it to Rielly who quickly tipped it to Marner, Marner passed it back to Matthews who was now in front of the net, back to Marner who went to pass it to Ekman-Larson, but Nylander reached forward with his stick at the last minute; the puck had been travelling too fast and simply tipped off of Nylander’s stick, ricocheting towards the Lion’s bench.

The Lions - who had been watching the puck - ducked. 

You - who had been watching Nadeau who was now limping after blocking a particularly nasty shot with his knee - didn’t see it coming. 

The puck hit you right in the face.

Your head whipped to the side in surprise before you all but fell from where you were standing on the bench. 

The play stopped, but that was on account of the puck being out of play and not on account that a member of the team - the most important member of the team, if you asked Remus - was down. 

“I’m fine.” You hissed at everybody - the players on the bench, the players on the ice, the coaching staff - who had called your name. But you had your face in your hands, were kneeling on the wet rubber floor, and your voice came out pinched.

“Y/N.” Remus barked, suddenly feeling breathless even though he’d not been on the ice, unable to push through the other players on the bench to get to you. 

Lars - the team's PT - placed a gentle hand on your shoulder and bent down beside you, and Remus was struck with how much this looked like how you cared for the players when you met them on the ice. Head low, soft murmurs so that no one else could hear, and a comforting hand. 

“Stay out here for the team, in case they need you.” Your response came muffled from behind your hands, and you quickly stood and took off down the tunnel towards the locker room alone. 

Remus only registered the sound of whistles being blown then, James having clearly chirped at one of the Toronto players, earning him a shove from Rielly before Grönvall, Nylander, Dearborn, and Marner paired off, too.

“That should be a fucking delay of game!” James barked at the ref who was shoving him towards the Lion’s bench (and away from Rielly’s jugular). 

“I heard ya the first time, Potter.” The referee grumbled as James got off the ice. 

“Fan har du glömt hur fan man siktar på det jävla nätet, Nylander?” (translation: did you fucking forget how to aim for the damn net) Remus spat as he watched number 88 skate towards the Toronto bench.

“Kukhuvud.” (translation: dickhead) Nylander muttered back as he stepped off the ice.

“That’s enough, number 10.” The ref barked warningly at Remus. 

Remus did not think that was enough, however, and looked over at the Toronto bench only to find the team medic giving some instruction to their PT before disappearing down their own tunnel, and Remus felt his heart unclench slightly. 

He sincerely hoped he was going to check on you.

Remus wondered if he should do the same.

“Lupin, Black, Trenholm; you’re on.” Coach barked, and Remus tried to breath around his panic as he pushed himself over the boards and lined up for the face off. 

“Loops, the more times the whistle needs to be blown, the longer it’s going to take to get back to the locker room.” James whispered to Remus as they repositioned for another face off.

“Unless you’re trying to get kicked out of the game for a misconduct.” Sirius added breezily from his other side. “Then you’re on the right track.” 

“Do not get any penalties or injuries.” James continued severely. “She cannot help you right now and you’ll be of no help to her.”

Remus let out a groan and playfully shoved his two line mates away from him. “Okay, Cap. Don’t have to be so damn reasonable all the time.” 

“Isn’t he the worst?” Sirius chuckled, though Remus knew he was likely glad James talked Remus down.  

And it was only once Remus stopped going for blood and focused more on ending the fucking game - which required one more goal so as not to go into overtime - did the clock finally start running down. 

Fenwick ended up tipping in a shot from Sirius with only 30 seconds left of the third, and since Remus was getting off and knew he wouldn’t be needed in the last 29 seconds of the game, he stepped off the ice and completely bypassed the bench as he made for the locker room. 

“Y/N?” Remus called as he made it to the empty locker room. “Doc?” 

He checked the exam room which was empty before checking the dark room next.

After knocking gently and without waiting for a response, Remus pushed the door open to find you sitting on the floor with your back against the wall, eyes closed and face pointed to the ceiling as you held an ice pack to your cheek. 

“Baby.” 

“Is the game over?” You asked then, turning to look at him and basically ripping his heart right out of his chest when he noticed the drying tear tracks on your face. 

Before Remus could respond, the sound of the arena horn blared signalling the end of the game. 

“Yes, the game is over.”

“Did we win?”

Remus forced a laugh out as he took off all the equipment he could manage; his gloves, helmet, his jersey, followed by his elbow pads and finally his shoulder pads, leaving him in only his underarmour on his top half. “Of course we won, lovie. Think we were gonna let them get away with that?”

You tried to smile at him, but the deep sigh that left your lungs told him it was just for show.

“My poor girl.” He cooed as he reached for the ice you were holding to your face. “What happened, hm? Let me see.”

You released your hold on the ice pack that Remus gently pulled away to expose your cheek; already mottled and blooming with deep, bruising colours. It had even broken the skin, though it seemed that it was shallow enough to only require a piece of medical tape slapped over it. 

“Den jävlan.” (translation: that fucker) Remus muttered under his breath. “I can’t believe he did this to you.”

Your brows furrowed at Remus’ words but you didn’t get a chance to respond when the sounds from the locker room permeated the dark room. 

“Loops, is doc-” ‘in here?’ was left unsaid when Remus turned to see Sirius standing in the doorway with Isak and Benjy behind him, exposing your form huddled on the ground. 

“Doc.” Benjy whined, earning him an elbow in the ribs from Isak and a reproachful shushing from Sirius. 

“Concussion protocol, Fenny.” Sirius hissed at him, earning him a quiet laugh from you which Remus was eternally grateful for.

“Does anyone need me?” You asked quietly, causing all four boys to shout (albeit quietly) various protests. 

“I think these fuckers can manage to tape up their own jammed fingers for one game, yeah?” Benjy offered. 

“Lars can help, too.” Isak agreed.

“There ya have it doc, your job has been made obsolete!” Sirius cheered. “You’re welcome.” 

“Alright, alright. Get out of here.” Remus grumbled with no real ire, letting out a breath of relief when the sounds from the locker room faded away when the door was shut behind them. 

“Were you looked at?” He asked you then, repositioning the ice to your cheek as he cupped the opposite side of your face with his free hand. 

“Yeah. The Toronto medic checked me out.”

“Concussion?”

“Probably.” 

Remus made a sympathetic tsking sound as he pulled the ice back from your face as if expecting the bruising to have gone down in the last 15 seconds. “I hate this.”

“What? My face?” You tried to tease. 

“No.” Remus denied, shooting you an exasperated look. “What he’s done to your face.” 

“It was a puck, Rem.” You chided. “It happens.”

“But not to you.”

“This is how I feel when you get hurt, you know.” You pointed out to him, even lifting one of your eyebrows expectantly at him.

Remus groaned. “But it’s supposed to happen to me.”

“It’s hockey. Now I’m just a real member of the team.”

Remus tilted his head as he smiled at you. “You’ve always been a member of the team, doc.” He assured you. “The prettiest member, at that.”

You hummed in appreciation as he moved his hand down the column of your neck; touch gentle and reverent as you tilted your head back against the wall.

“Don’t let Black hear you say that.” 

Remus tried to control his laughter, he really did, but he couldn’t help the surprised bark that bubbled up at your words. “You know, I think he may feel bad enough to bestow the title to you.”

“You think?” You asked then, tilting your head into his hand that was holding the ice pack. 

“Positive.” He promised, smiling at you in semi-content silence before tsking pathetically at you again. “My poor sweet girl; what do you need, hm? What can I do?” 

You looked at him for a long moment; eyes darting across his face and pupils perhaps a bit too wide considering what just happened that threatened to make Remus’ protective ire return to its former boil from its current simmer when you came to some decision.

“Can you go shower?”

“Shower?” He asked disbelievingly, noticing you turn somewhat bashful.

“Please?” 

“Yeah, you smell and you’re getting sweat all over our gorgeous medic.” James offered quietly as he slowly closed the door behind him; donned in his team hoodie and a pair of sweats, hair still dripping from the shower he just got out of and his contacts traded for his usual glasses as he moved across the room to sit beside you against the wall. “I’ve got it from here, Loops, but you’ll want to be quick; Grönvall knows doc has a thing for Swedes now, I may not be able to fight him off for long.”

James looked so earnest as he said it that the way his face melted at the sound of your laughter made Remus’ love for his teammate and captain increase tenfold; heart threatening to burst from his chest.

“Okay?” He asked you, pressing a kiss to your forehead and then to your uninjured cheek, and then to the tip of your nose before placing one on your lips. “You’ll be okay with Cap? Think you can manage?”

“I’ll do my best.” You responded, your soft smile growing cheeky at the sound of James’ scoff, though your one eye twitched as you winced. “Fuck my face hurts.”

“Get out of here, Loops. You’re making her smile and hurting her face.” James scolded. 

“Alright, alright. Just don’t leave me for Grönvall.” Remus insisted as he pressed one more kiss to your head before he stood and began walking towards the door. “I mean it; the only thing worse than a Norwegian or a Dane is another Swede.”

[aliciavance4228]

The Odyssey: Funny Moments

Most of you liked my "The Iliad: Funny Moments" post, so I decided to make this one as well.

1. When Telemachus asks Odysseus what kind of help they have for taking down the suitors, Odysseus basically says, "We've got Zeus and Athena on our side. Are you sure that'll be enough?"

2. "Brother, who blinded you?" "Nobody! Nobody did!" "...Then we're going to go back to sleep."

Taken to the logical extreme in a comic book adaptation where Odysseus and his men gave him fake names:

"Brother, who blinded you?"

"Nobody! Idontknow! Idontcare! Or maybe... Idontremember!"

"So that's why they called him Polyfool."

3. After his crew opened the bag of winds thinking it had treasure and caused a huge storm, Odysseus briefly considers suicide as valid as an option to preserving through hardship.

4. The sheer, mind-boggling, testicle-shriveling amount of crap that Odysseus and his crew get put through when trying to get back to Ithaca can be viewed as hilarious in a cringe comedy kind of way. By the time Odysseus gets home and realizes that his wife has been badgered and harangued by suitors for a decade one could be forgiven for thinking that his wanton slaughter of them all was less about their violation of guest rights and more just blowing off some steam on a morally unambiguous target.

5. When briefly visiting the Underworld, Persephone allows Odysseus to talk with his mother and other dead people. Odysseus is absolutely terrified of her and dreads staying too long and incurring her wrath, running back to his ship fearful that she'll sic Medusa's head on him.

6. One of Odysseus's crew randomly dies by falling off a roof after a night of heavy drinking. Everyone else gets to be killed by horrible monsters and the wrath of the gods, but he instead gets to be a posthumous reminder about the dangers of alcoholism. Even better, after his death he berates Odysseus for not burying him properly when our hero goes to Hades!

7. On the way back to Ithaca, Telemachus asks a favor of Nestor's son Pisistratus, and proceeds to invoke two generations of friendship to get some help dodging Nestor's aggressive hospitality.

8. Penelope asks a disguised Odysseus to interpret a dream she had. It turns out that during the dream, one of its characters explicitly explained what it all represented, and Odysseus just repeats it back to her.

9. While disguised as a human, Athena goes to the trouble of giving a plausible explanation for her departure... then promptly blows her cover by turning into a bird and flying away in front of a boggling Nestor and Telemachus.

10. Penelope's tricks against the suitors, of which the two best known are:

At one point, she told the suitors she'd choose her next husband after she'd finish weaving a burial shroud for Odysseus's father Laërtes... And every night, she'd undo her work. She strung them along for three years and would have continued had an unfaithful maid not exposed her.

On page we see her daring them to replicate one of Odysseus's feats: she put twelve axes on the ground so that the rings in the handle would align and gave them Odysseus' unstrung bow and arrows, and told them that whoever could use that bow toshoot an arrow through all the rings would be her next husband.She also forgot to tell them it was a recurve bow that the suitors wouldn't even recognize when at rest, let alone string.

A lesser-known ploy is when she calls out the suitors for freeloading off her husband's estate instead of courting her with lavish gifts. They rush to present her with gifts, while the disguised Odysseus watches with delight.

11. Athena's response when Odysseus fails to recognize her in disguise and tells her a backstory he came up with on the spot is essentially "That's my liar! There he is!"

Credits: TV Tropes

[write-here-n-now]

What to do when you've crossed a line?

C.(S). Jeonghan x Reader | WC. 821 | G. Angst| Pt. 1/? |

Part 2 | Part 3

You were used to your best friend’s antics. His “cheating”, the pranks and general everyday shenanigans but also the kind-hearted soul and caring nature he hid behind every antic. You didn’t know where along the way your feelings matured into a storm of butterflies whenever he came in sight. You could kid yourself into thinking that everyone cared that much about their friends, best friends even, and the feelings would pass. How many months does an average crush last? At least 37 months, right? You were simply guessing and definitely not keeping track of how many times he caused you to stay awake thinking of a fantasy future. 

Having feelings for your best friend was one thing, holding yourself back from giving the side eye to every person who flirted with him was another feat. How often had these moments been replayed, hot person flirts with Jeonghan, he entertains them, and you remain in the corner, out of sight, silently seething but ultimately unable to do anything. 

If he asked you to fly him to the moon, you would do so without question. Hide a dead body? All you needed to do was grab a shovel, but be a bridge to him and whoever he wanted to go home with that night. You could take a rain check. 

You got out of it often given how many of your mutual friends were present at the events and parties you all attended but it seemed that your luck ran out. Tonight, most of your friends either ditched the party early or had skipped out completely, leaving you to find a plausible excuse as to why you, in love with your best friend, could not talk him up to someone so said best friend could go home with them whilst you were left behind wondering what it would be like if you two went home together instead.

You became standoffish, faked fatigued, and pretended to be tipsy but he saw through your antics, confused with your behaviour until he resorted to tugging your arm repeatedly, pestering you to go over and rizz him up to some good-looking person who had been eyeing him all night.

Why did he need a wing person anyway? It's not like he had any trouble talking to people given his charm, mischievous aura and drop-dead gorgeous looks, he attracted people left and right, like a thirst-ridden nomad to an oasis. 

His persistence, on a normal day, would have eventually broken you down until you might have just walked up to whoever he needed you to, but something snapped inside you the longer you stared, wondering if you would be at the end of his affection. His eagerness shattered your short-lived fantasy but also wrecked your mood, unable to withstand being in that space, you pulled your arm out of his grasp and stormed out of the party. 

You didn’t stop to look back, walking out of the party room, out the building and towards your apartment, a mere five-minute walk. The chilly autumn weather would have caused you to mentally nitpick to have worn something thicker but your anger fuelled the passion to speed walk to the only safe space you could think of. 

Jeonghan had come after you, yet his hollers of your name fell on deaf ears as you were determined to block out all the external noise and finish your trek back home.

Catching up to you, he grabbed your upper arm, both fumbling you in your step and spinning you around right into his chest. 

“Y/N what the hell is the problem?” 

You avoid his eyes, cross your arms and look anywhere except directly at him.

“Are you going to stand there pouting or tell me what's wrong? Why did you storm out?” He waits for an answer, a fruitless endeavour against your current ego.

The sigh that leaves his mouth signals his own frustration at your lack of cooperation. He begins again hoping you answer at least one of his questions.

“Was it the tugging? I’m sorry if it bothered you too much…” Silence... “Are you drunk? Are you feeling sick?” 

His questions increased, asking you about the day, the party and even whether you liked the vibe of who he was trying to go home with to understand what the issue was, and that got on your last nerve

“I’M IN LOVE YOU DAMN IT!”

It's like a weight on your heart had been lifted but his expression only brought on a much heavier boulder on your heart and a knot in your throat. If you stayed here any longer you would begin crying and that was the last damn thing you needed tonight.

“Forget it, you don’t even care…”

You shake off his grip for the second time that night and storm off to your apartment with more urgency than before because now you’ve officially crossed the line in your friendship.

[luimagines]

You Reunite After Not Confessing Part 3

Masterlist

Part 1 Part 2

Part 3 will include Wind, Sky and Four.

Content under the cut!

Wind

Wind was back in his boat out at sea. It was fairly quiet with most of the monsters already taken care of.

He found that there wasn’t actually much to do anymore. He had sailed over most of his world had to offer and the water was still damaging so he couldn’t explore anymore of what was under it- especially now that he had a better idea of what was there to begin with.

He almost missed the time when his boat was able to talk to him but he knew better now. It was just quiet.

He never thought he’d hate the quiet.

Wind was a bit lonely to say the least. He had his home, his island and his family but lately he’s been missing the group he had found when he went through that portal. But he was also missing you.

There was so much he still wanted to talk to you about and he had promised you to show the Great Sea and his island and the very small world he had at his disposal. But he never got to do that.

Wind was peacefully being rocked to sleep by the gentle waves of the ocean when he heard it.

A scream.

Followed by a very loud splash and immediately thrashing water.

Wind shoots up in the boat, nearly knocking it over as he looks for the cause of the sound.

He can see the flying water out in the distance and quickly moves his boat to go and meet whoever might be in need of saving. Although, he has half the mind to ask how they even came this far out into the ocean to begin with. He’s in the middle of nowhere and there’s nothing that would have just dropped a person in the middle of the ocean.

He sails as quickly as he can to help and doesn’t think twice about grabbing the person and hauling them onto his boat even when it threatens to capsize in the moment.

They get thrown on board and wind takes a moment to catch his breath. “Are you ok?”

“Y-yeah...” You cough and spit out as much ocean water as you can. “I think so.”

Wind shoots up again and nearly throws you both over the boat once more. He cries out your name in shocked delighted. “HEY! You’re here!”

You cough some more and look up at him for a moment. Recognition lights up your eyes and you tackling him in a hug, forgetting that you’re absolutely soaking wet. “HEY! I missed you!”

He laughs and hugs you with just as much fervor. “What are you doing here?”

“I have no idea!” You shout back, wiping the water from your face once more. “I just fell and next thing I knew I was here!”

“Come on...” Wind can’t ignore the way his heart starts beating again just seeing you again. He helps you get situated in his boat quickly and opens the sail to head back. “Let’s get you taken care of first. It’s not good to stay wet for long. You might get sick.”

You grab his hand before he can call up the Wind Waker to give you both a boost in he right direction. “Link?”

Wind pauses and his mouth goes dry. Why is it suddenly different when you actually call him by his name? “Yes?”

“I really really missed you.” You admit quietly with a soft blush on your cheek.

Wind coughs and holds your hand tightly for a moment. “Yeah... Me too.”

Sky

Sky was busy.

When he returned home to Skyloft after it all, the first thing he wanted to do was do something different. He had left his home in the sky and dived for the surface once more.

He poured his energy and soul into fixing up the settlement into something comfortable for his people to live in. He needed to have everything perfect for when you would come by. Realistically, he knew that you would be centuries after his death day but that wasn’t going to stop him.

That being said, he wasn’t expecting to wake up to you banging on his door one morning.

You threw yourself at him and tackled him to the ground.

He was too shocked to say anything at first. Sky could only put his hands on your shoulders and stare.

“Thank Hylia! A familiar face!” You cried and tucked yourself into the crook of his neck. “SKKYYY!!! I MISSED YOUU!!”

Sky feels a laugh bubble out of his throat. As the reality of the situation dawns on him, he can feel himself get more and more excited. He hugs you back tightly and falls backwards.

“YOU!!” He shouts and rolls around with you in his arms. “I missed you too! What are you doing here?!”

“I don’t know!”

“How do you not know?!”

“I don’t know!!! But I don’t care!” You grin and wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him closer to you. 

Sky laughs too and hugs you some more. “Alright! Well then welcome to the surface settlement!”

You both grin at each other and take the moment to just look at each other. You’ve both changed in the time you were apart.

While you both were taking the time to study one another and the way you’ve both matured, you find yourselves moving in, leaning closer to one another.

Your noses touch and you both jolt away from each other.

“Sorry.” Sky blushes and gets to his feet. He holds out his hand to you. “Sorry, sorry. I don’t know.”

“Can I kiss you?” You blurt and Sky freezes.

You both stare at each other again before Sky bites the bullet and dives in, kissing you like he’s wanted to since before he left the group.

You put your hands in his hair and pull him closer.

When you pull apart, he kisses you once, twice more and then takes a deep breath. “I’ve been wanting to do that.”

You laugh breathlessly and smile. “Honestly... I probably could have waited longer for that.... I’m glad I didn’t have to.”

“Sorry to keep you waiting.”

Four

Four eventually found himself back in the familiar grooves of routine.

Working in the forge was calming, mindless yet detail oriented work. That’s to say he daydreamed as he worked. Quite the contrary actually.

He was so laser focused on the jobs and commissions he had to complete that he didn’t have much time to miss the people he’s met on his last journey. Not any more at last.

He likes to think that he’s grown past the idea of despair and abandonment. He knows what’s happened and he’s almost sure that he’s grown enough that the wounds have healed by now. It’s enough to get him through the day without thinking about the others and what they be doing.

Or you... But he tries to not eve think that far into your general direction.

He’s deep in his work when he hears the familiar sound of the front desk being rung. Part of him curses his luck. He’s at a moment where he can’t afford to be from his project for very long or else something could go wrong. And he’s never been fond of starting over.

It rings again.

“Coming!” He shouts at the top of his lungs. He has to. Or else is ever going to hear him over the roar of the forge around him. 

Making a split decision, he puts the water into the bucket of water next to him and allows it to cool. He’ll get back to the point he was at to finish the job.

Four shakes off his gloves and moves his apron to the side as he comes to the front side of his shop. “Sorry for the wait. You caught me at a busy hou-...”

You’re standing in front of him, wringing your hands in front of you, nervously shifting your weight from foot to foot. You jolt once you notice him and nearly take a step back. You smile but it’s awkward and stinted. “...Hey... Long time not see?”

Four is gobsmacked.

It appears you weren’t anticipating his reaction- or rather his lack of one. You seem to grow more nervous. “I uh... I thought I’d find you here.”

Four keeps staring at you. The curtain separating the shop from the forge falls from his grip and gently falls behind him.

You lick your lips nervously. A subtle movement that Four shamelessly follows despite himself.

“I went to your house earlier.” You blurt when he fails to reply or fill the silence. “It took me a while to remember where I was but when I realized that this was your Hyrule I figured I should try to find you. But you weren’t home. This was my second best bet but I didn’t know where it was so I asked your dad and he told me the the way but I think I got lost in the middle of it all-”

You’re rambling and Four feels himself unstick his feet and slowly walk towards you. For some reason you seem to be stuck where you are and merely wait for him to approach you. Four’s glad, even if he’s not entirely sure why you’re here.

“I- wait! Look!” You try to defend yourself from his silent ‘judgement’. “Ok, so before you say anything I want to say that I did try to get here by following directions. I asked like three different people on how to get here but I guess you painted it since I last came here? I thought I remembered it being a brown building but now it’s red. Or maybe it’s always been red and light was weird-”

Four hugs you.

“Oh.” You relax instantly, wrapping your arms around him without a second thought..

“...This is nice.”

[slime-sandwhich-nom]

Don’t suppose you have any headcanons for Cosmo’s parents are their dynamics? I saw your post earlier and felt kinda bad for Mama Cosma (until she got toxic with Cosmo lol)

Also, I don’t mean to make u uncomfortable but I keep thinking about Cosmo blowing up half of Fairy World when he was born so I imagine how rough the pregnancy was.

ALRIGHT SO!

let's see ...

To be honest, in my head Cosmo parents were like those super sappy couples, kind of like Cosmo and Wanda are right now. Or like parents in a sitcom during the 90s.

Then schnozmo came in, and everything was still super great. No toxicity nor abuse, nothing.

Just a family of three in fairy world ( + personally I don't think any of them had any thoughts on godparenting.)

Then Cosmo came in.

I haven't really thought of it but it's kind of like this

happy family + new member of the family + somehow inherited powerful powers from jorgen side of the family and this is where shit goes downhill.

it's a whole series of events where they wanted to take Cosmo away because he was too dangerous (and strong), then the abolition of new babies, then assuming papa cosmo died (in my head it was because of a failing organ after getting turned into a fly, the same cosmo had a surgery on in the og series or something like that) then schnozmo went off and it was just mama Cosma all alone with this power baby she ended up attached on in a very unhealthy way.

it's like if the entire family slowly, very slowly crumbled and she held onto the first and only thing that was left of it, becoming clingy, toxic and neglective of cosmo actual needs.

also I do imagine her being sort of a boy mom in general.

for the pregnancy part I assume it was easier than Cosmo's only because they at least knew what to do.

Cosmo struggled so much because it's been thousand of years since the last baby, and he didn't even know what to do when he went to labor.

also by the baby flashback he seems pretty big for a normal sized fairy (taking poof as a comparison.) so..that was something !

I guess that was because of the jorgan genes.

(it can always be that poof was just odd shaped, though.)

But back to the dynamics (and headcanons)

- papa cosmo was generally a very calm guy, he's the true malewife staying at home taking care of the kids while mama Cosma goes to work.

- always cold for some reason (thank God mama Cosma is a living furnace, much like Cosmo.)

- he always had health problems, which lead inevitably to his death. (Organ failure.)

- there's a tiny bit of size difference between him and mama Cosma, she's taller and bulkier while he is more shorter and skinny.

(if you have seen the design post, you'll get a better idea of the size difference.)

- he gets extremely flustered and very easily too with mama cosma

- he died kind of..WHILE he was a fly because he was kind of already dealing with his organ failing.

To put it short, the organ fairies have that makes them shapeshift (which I don't remember the name for the life of me) was already failing, and when he got turned into a fly he..got stuck like that. leading to him to die because of it.

This means Cosmo failing organ that he replaced with surgery is inherited!

- it's clear Cosmo took the majority of his traits from his father, and this meant mama Cosma was always more attached to Cosmo than to schnozmo (who was also pretty similar but because of his big nose it didn't do the same effect) because she just..saw her husband in Cosmo.

- papa cosmo liked to knit and cook :]

- he probably had those nerd jobs like scientist or something. I remember seeing somewhere someone saying that papa Cosmo's job had to do with researching about humans which would help for the future god parents (assuming they need to learn how a human works, talks and behaves for future disguises and to make sure your god child doesn't die immediately) and its really cool so I took it. So whoever had this idea, credit to them.

- mama Cosma job was probably pretty simple, like a maid.

- in my head, despite mama Cosma putting all of her attention on Cosmo, she was still super clingy to schnozmo too just not as much and this lead to schnozmo desperately looking for a way to get away (since we saw in the show cosmo was like trapped in his own house at that point, assuming schnozmo had the same treatment.) and that's how he ended up in the crime world.

^^^ always assuming that she was starting to get too clingy with her own kids because of papa cosmo dying

- super straight thin hair papa cosmo x super thick curly hair mama Cosma (which lead to wavy hair Cosmo and schnozmo)

- this is a general headcanon for fairies, but I enjoy a lot how in the tinkle bell movie (1953) whenever she gets mad she turns all red, so now all fairies in FOP do.

- also, another headcanon but it's more Cosmo centered.

As much as I enjoy Cosmo, the og show brutally butchered him and since I can't go against canon that he's now an idiot and has a high pitched voice, I present to you these two headcanons.

(more theories than anything but I embrace them as my headcanons.)

vvv for context they're talking about pilot Cosmo and specifically the line "I gotta get this thing (wand) fixed."

And! The scene where Timmy eats part of Cosmo brain, which is also a reason why later on he gets slow and more incompetent.

+ after Timmy they retired and got their very earned vacation, which helped Cosmo a TON as we can see how in a new wish he's back being an actual decent person and competent again, but still has some side effects like the high pitched voice and being rather slow to get things.

Credit to the original commenter of course.

And yes, this doesn't change that he sucked in school. Cosmo was never academic smart, he was always street smart, I can see him sucking ass in school still.

Also with this hc we can have the trope that Cosmo went from awkward shy guy > smug happily married man because I love that trope.

I think that's it, from what I remember at least.

[suzukiblu]

more pocket-sized soulmates from @bucky-boychik-barnes's Pockets AU:

Tim's Pocket refuses to wear a mask, which is an issue. He doesn't want to wear the tiny wire-rimmed glasses either, or even change out of his weird straps-and-belts version of the Superman suit into . . . literally anything else, at this point. Tim would take anything else. They've given him options, but he's refused them all. He won't take off the costume. 

Also he won't stop flying around the cave like a bat out of hell, and it's seriously annoying. 

"Have you successfully selected a name for your Pocket, Master Tim?" Alfred inquires as he pours everyone tea at the table while Bruce is staring assessingly at Tim's Pocket, including four little Pocket-sized cups' worth–one for Bruce's Cat ("Kitty" to the tabloids), one each for Dick's Red and Star, and one for Tim's . . . whoever. 

Alfred doesn't have a Pocket of his own. Tim's always felt too awkward to ask about it. 

And Jason never got a Pocket at all. 

"No, not yet," Tim says, because the whole no-mask/yes-cape issue has been a lot more immediately concerning than naming him. He can't take a Pocket Superman home to his dad. Pocket Clark Kent is going to be bad enough. 

Assuming Tim's Pocket ever puts the stupid glasses on, anyway. 

"You should get on that," Dick advises as he picks up his teacup with an appreciative nod of thanks to Alfred and takes a sip. "Red got really mad at me when I didn't name her right away. I mean, like, naming Pockets is so . . . outsider, you know? And kinda gilly, too. But that's how Babs grew up, obviously, and I don't know how they did it on Krypton, but Uncle Clark was raised by gadje too, so . . ." 

Tim understood absolutely none of that, but just nods like he did and makes a note to go do some research later. 

"Sure," he says, just hoping he can convince his Pocket to ditch the damn cape sooner than later. Red wheels her tiny wheelchair over to the Pockets' nicely-set little tea table and ignores Star floating down to land in the seat across from her. They don't usually get along very well, which is a little weird to see in Pockets who didn't come from people who are, like, on the literal opposite ends of the ethical spectrum, especially ones that belong to the same person, but they both settle in all the same. Cat does an artful flip off of Bruce's caped shoulder down to the table and then strolls over to join them. Tim's Pocket looks curious, but stays hovering in the air just over his shoulder. 

Is his Pocket, like, antisocial or something? Is that a concern? Usually Pockets group up really easily, from what Tim knows. Not that he's ever had one before, and admittedly his parents' had always mostly ignored each other, but . . . normally they do, right? 

Cat chirps impatiently and makes a beckoning gesture at Tim's Pocket, but he, very weirdly, sort of floats backwards and almost . . . hides behind Tim's head. Just for a moment, but . . . 

Weird, Tim thinks. Weird, and not very Superman-like. Pockets are usually a bit more emotionally honest than the people they come from, but Superman's met Cat as many times as Bruce has met Laney, so why would a Pocket that came from him ever hesitate to go over to her? 

Star chirps too, holding out her arms and starting to glow with intensely bright solar radiation that would only be an encouraging gesture to a Kryptonian, Tim is sure. It does the job, though, and his Pocket pauses for just a moment longer, then goes to the visible effort to put on a bright grin and darts over to land beside her. She immediately starts chattering at him in Pocket-talk and he chatters back easily, and Tim then has to witness his own damn Pocket start undeniably flirting with one of Dick's Pockets. 

He has never been more mortified in his life, he thinks right up until his Pocket turns his head and starts flirting with Cat. 

Tim disassociates a little. Like. Just a bit. 

Or a lot. 

"Hm," Bruce says while Tim is busy dying of mortification, his eyes narrowing assessingly. Star is happily flirting back at Tim's Pocket, to Tim's absolute horror, but worse, Cat is actually humoring him. 

Tim has died and this is hell. There's no other explanation whatsoever for this.  

Cat reaches over and scritches his Pocket behind the ears. He looks startled, then visibly zones out for a moment, and then leans into the contact and purrs. Cat chirps approvingly, Star laughs, and Red snorts, but fondly. 

Tim is definitely, definitely in hell right now. Oh god. What is happening right now and why is it happening to him? 

"Well, he's got aspirations, I'll give him that," Dick says wryly as he leans back in his chair. "Though I don't think Lois Lane would appreciate them." 

"It's not Superman," Bruce states matter-of-factly. Tim and Dick both blink; Tim's Pocket immediately scowls.

[errorryx]

shitty batman fanfiction

So AO3 went down last night, and my friend @armyanimal156 was in the middle of a fanfiction and couldn’t finish it, so I offered to finish it for him. I used my vague understanding of comic book storytelling from my brief Marvel comics phase in 2019, plus the very minimal knowledge i picked up from some of my mutuals' posts, to assemble this nonsense. This is Damian What’s-his-face’s Journey of Self-Discovery, originally typed out stream-of-consciousness into Discord and then edited into a more digestible format.

Please for the love of god understand that this is not my usual writing style and also I'm not in this fandom and don't know shit about fuck. This is just a very long shitpost. ok enjoy

—

Damian, the newest Robin who was raised by assassins, was about to go on a journey to atone for his sins. He used Batman’s credit card to buy himself plane tickets to Eurasia and Africa, because there was a package deal he saw online or whatever. He decided to fly economy because he had self-esteem issues and thought he didn’t deserve first class.

He arrived in Eurasia, which in DC comics universe is the name of a small country in the continent of Syrup. Unfortunately, when he saw who was waiting for him at the airport, he was shocked.

“Mom?” Damian said. “Dad? Other Mom? That one guy?”

That’s right, it was the four assassins that raised him. The comics didn’t mention the other two assassins, Dad and Other Mom, because they weren’t relevant to the other stories being told. He calls his grandpa “that one guy.” This definitely isn’t someone poorly retconning comic canon into the fic after being told new information or anything like that.

“Yes, Damian, it’s us,” said Other Mom (that’s her legal government name). “We need your help. We’re going to assassinate the President of the United States.”

“No way,” Damian said. “I’ve changed. I fight for justice now.”

“Is that so?” that one guy said. “Then you should know that the President of the United States is actually evil and deserves to die.”

Damian wasn’t sure if he could believe that one guy, because he was a supervillain. But he decided to trust him just this once. He went and found the President of the United States, who was on a diplomatic mission to the small Syrupean nation of Eurasia, and shot him point blank on live television, Joker-movie-style.

Thankfully for Damian, that one guy was telling the truth: the president was evil and everyone had been secretly hoping for someone to assassinate him. People celebrated in the streets, and Batman and Tim and Drake and whoever else called and told him he did a good job. Even better, his mom patted him on the back and told Damian she was proud of him, which made him feel somewhat better about his childhood trauma.

Then, the president came back as a zombie who was impervious to bullets and wanted to eat everyone’s brains. Everyone was very upset about this, including all four of his assassin parents, and Batman, and Drake and Josh. Damian decided his best bet was to run away from his problems instead of facing them like a man, so he used his plane ticket to Africa and escaped.

—

The plane landed in Africa, which in DC comics universe is a small island nation in the Specific Ocean. Damian had never been to Africa before, but it was a popular tourist destination for its pristine beaches and overpriced coconut cocktails. However, after arriving on the island, he quickly learned that everything was owned by a mysterious billionaire known as Bruce Wane, Bruce Wayne’s twin brother who has never been mentioned in the comics before because he wasn’t relevant to any of the stories being told.

After some investigating, Damian learned that Bruce Wane was secretly a supervillain who terrorized the island, who went by the name of Badman (like Batman, but bad). Badman had a sidekick named Robbin. When Damian went up against this pair, Robbin pickpocketed him.

“Hey!” Damian complained. “I saw that! Don’t steal my stuff!”

“Damian,” Badman said in a fake deep voice, Dark Knight-movie-style. “If you want your wallet back, you have to join me. You can be Robbin 2.” Robbin looked upset about this, but didn’t say anything.

“No way, bitch,” Damian said (he gets to say swear words because of his childhood trauma). “Batman is way cooler than you.”

Badman took a few steps back and did a triple backflip. “Bet your stupid Batman can’t do that.”

Damian had to admit that Batman could not do that. “Fine, you win. I’ll join you.”

He followed Badman and Robbin to the Badcave (like the Batcave, but bad). Badman began explaining his plan to take over the world by dropping a bunch of badbombs (like batbombs, but bad) on top of the small island nation of Africa and then the rest of the world.

“That’s a really cool plan,” Damian said. “Can I have the password to your computer? I want to play Roblox.” BECAUSE AS IT TURNS OUT THIS KID IS LIKE TWELVE YEARS OLD HOLY SHIT WHY IS HE FIGHTING CRIME. WHY IS HE ASSASSINATING PEOPLE. WHAT THE FUCK MAN???

So Badman gave Damian the password to the badcomputer (like the batcomputer, but bad), which was, of course, “nanananananananabadman” and gave him unsupervised internet access.

Of course, Damian immediately hacked into the mainframe and set off every badbomb in the badwarehouse (like the batwarehouse, but bad). The Badcave exploded and everything was ruined. Then, Damian revealed that when Robbin was busy pickpocketing him, he was actually pickpocketing Robbin at the same time! He opened Robbin’s wallet and looked through his stuff.

As it turned out, Robbin’s ID picture looked the same as Damian’s, because they were secret TWINS and CLONES and TWIN CLONES. Robbin’s real name was Damien with an E. 

Robbin looked very sad, and he asked Damian if there was a way he could learn to be good instead of bad. “I could take you back to Batman,” Damian suggested. “You could be Robin 2. Actually, more like Robin 27 at this point.”

“That sounds great,” Robbin agreed, and they flew back to Gotham City together.

—

“Jesus Christ, not another one,” Alfred said when they got back.

Batman just shrugged and said, “This might as well happen.”

“It’s going to be really confusing around here if there’s two Damians,” Cass (one of them is named Cass right? or Cath? idfk) said. Everyone decided to call Damian with an e “Dame” and Damian with an a “Ian.” This detail was included despite the fact that it never came up again.

They turned on the news, which was conveniently at the beginning of a report about Badman, who had miraculously survived the explosions. He had now teamed up with the zombie president and vowed to destroy Batman and his league of child soldiers.

The zombie president staged a hostile takeover of the American troops, which was easy because the guy who replaced him was a wimpy loser. Soon the entire US Marines were outside Batman’s house, which apparently isn’t the first time this has happened, but this time they had all been turned into zombies. Which also isn’t the first time that’s happened. Writing an original plotline in DC comics is probably impossible.

So began the epic battle between Batman’s orphanage and the zombie marine corps.

Everything was going well for the good guys, but then Damian got into trouble. It looked like he was about to get seriously injured, until Damien jumped in front of him at the last second to save him, only to get bit by one of the zombies and become infected.

Soon enough all the zombies were defeated, but it didn’t feel like a victory, not when the twinclone kid they met ten minutes ago was dying in front of them.

“Listen, everyone,” Damien said, while slowly turning green (the color of zombies). “I know we just met each other, but the ten seconds of kindness I got from you were better than the entire rest of my incredibly traumatic life. So please, don’t mourn me. Put me out of my misery, and go save the world in my honor.”

Damian nodded and lifted his gun. “I was raised by assassins, in case anyone forgot,” he said. “I can do what needs to be done.” He proceeded to shoot Damien in the head.

But it didn’t do any damage at all, because as previously stated, zombies are impervious to bullets. So Damien finished turning green and stood up. “Please don’t eat our brains!” one of those other batkids said.

“Huh,” Damien said. “I don’t really want to eat anyone’s brains. I think I’m fine, actually.”

As it turned out, the zombie virus didn’t induce the desire to eat brains. The president and the entire US marines were just like that.

So the entire group hunted down Badman and the President and dropped batbombs (like badbombs, but not bad) on top of their heads, and they both exploded into one zombillion pieces.

Everyone lived happily ever after, and Damian now had a twinclone zombie brother and felt a lot better about his childhood trauma.

The end

—

bonus: more discord screenshots from last night for additional context, featuring my other friends @diligently-metastasizing (dyke lego homer) and @avloki-pal (wet ghost cat)

[mothbart]

hurts just right

introducing mothbart who has quickly become my favorite monster. this was literally supposed to be a fuckin' microfic but tell me why it's over 3k. anyway, this is for @sixlane, who came up with this meetcute. thank u for spending time talking to me about mothbart. and thank u to @theapocryphaofantares for also entertaining this idea with me.

bartylily | mothman au | words: 3.5k

The first time that Barty saw her was when she hit him with her car.

It was the one night that he decided that maybe walking around would be better—he’d been flying around all day and he got lazy. Walking was less work than flying.

But see, Barty knew better than to just walk along the road or even near the road. He was a cryptid, for Christ’s sake, and the most well looked for, too. They even gave him a sick nickname—Mothman. Not the most original name, but humans love it and who was he to judge? People come to West Virginia all the time to try and spot him, but he was pretty good at keeping himself hidden. So imagine his surprise when he thought he could just cross the road to get to the other side of the forest without getting caught and then being slammed into by a car.

The impact made him roll over the hood, and Barty felt his soul leave his body. He truly thought at that moment that this was it, this was the end and he supposed he lived an alright life. He didn’t really get to do the things that he had hoped for—like maybe go around the country and explore a bit. Or maybe actually see if sasquatches were real.

Then he realized that he was fine, he was clearly being dramatic. It takes more than a fucking car to bring him down. But he was annoyed—because who the fuck drives without their lights on? Especially at night? And on a road with no streetlights? He wanted to give whoever a piece of his mind, maybe even try and traumatize them a little—teach them a lesson. As much as he wanted to, though, he knew he needed to get out of there before whoever this was saw more than they should’ve. Barty quickly got up from the wet pavement, groaning while standing up. He looked over his shoulder to make sure that his wings were fine, and when he extended them out a little, he let out a sigh of relief when there wasn’t any noticeable damage.

He felt his head, touching his antennas, and grumbled to himself when he felt that his left one was bent. He hated when that shit happened—not that he’s been hit by cars often. But his antennas were the most painful to try and put back into place when they’ve been bent. Inhaling a deep breath, he yanked his antenna and pulled it straight, flinching when there was a sharp pain that ran through his head.

He brought his attention over to the vehicle, and the hood of this ugly, old green piece of shit car was very much dented (served them right for being an absolute moron). He blinked a few times when the car lights suddenly turned on (a little too late for that), practically shining right into his eyes.

And when he was able to focus better, Barty could’ve sworn that his heart fell out of his chest when he laid eyes on her.

Sat there was a girl frozen in place with a horrified expression. Large, green eyes stared back at him, and he could tell that she was not only freaked out but also intrigued by what she saw. He watched as she slapped her hand over her mouth, clearly needing a moment to process what just happened before she was struggling to get her seatbelt off. He wanted to see more of her looks—get a real, nice close up of her and make sure that he’s not being fucked around with by some kind of deity. There was no way that someone as beautiful as her existed, but here he was, being proved wrong.

He had to get out of there before he decided to do something stupid—like casually introduce himself and maybe ask her to hit him again to see if he was hallucinating.

So he took off before she could get out of her car.

☾ ☾ ☾

Barty saw her the next morning.

After he bolted out of there, he perched himself on a tree a few miles away. He checked himself, making sure that there weren’t any major injuries other than a few scratches here and there. He was exhausted at this point, and who knew that getting hit by a car would take so much energy out of him. He made himself comfortable on the branch and allowed himself to fall asleep.

When he woke up, he figured he should at least go check out the area where he got hit. He’s not sure what compelled him to make him want to go back—it just felt like he was being pulled there, and it was a feeling that he hadn’t felt before. His wings weren’t sore anymore, so flying out there wasn’t too bad.

He landed on a tree that was closer to the road, where he had a clear view of everything. He could see that there was a car just parked in the middle of the road, and it wasn’t the one that hit him last night.

Two people were standing outside, looking around at the opposite side of the forest.

“—I swear to God, James, I know what I saw—”

“Lily, I’m sure it was a deer or something. It was late—”

“Deer can’t fly, James,” the girl snapped. When they both turned around, Barty recognized the girl right away.

And she looked fucking ethereal when she didn’t look scared out of her mind. The sun made her red hair glisten and it fell over her shoulders. Barty could see the scattered freckles covering her arms and face. She looked annoyed, and when Barty looked at the guy next to her, he could see why she was annoyed.

He looked like a douche canoe.

“Listen, it was dark outside, you forgot to turn on your lights while driving,” the guy—James—said. “I’m sorry that there’s damage to your car, I told you that you could borrow mine while you search for a new one.”

“I don’t care about my car,” the girl—Lily—said. “I just want to find what I hit.”

“I don’t think we’re going to find it,” James replied, sighing. He walked over to the driver's side of the car and opened the door. “Come on, Lily, let’s go.”

Barty watched as James shut the car door, and Lily just stood out there, staring into the woods as if Barty was going to come out and say hello.

He wanted to—you know—say hello, but he knew better and stayed put. Lily shook her head and turned around, making her way to the car and getting inside the passenger seat. The two of them drove away, and Barty rolled his eyes.

“You’re never going to see her again,” Barty told himself. “Get real.”

☾ ☾ ☾

Barty saw Lily a couple of days after the incident.

It was late at night, the stars were out and the frogs were croaking loudly. Barty had just finished scaring off some annoying teenagers away from the TNT bunkers, and he was hoping to have some peace and quiet but that clearly wasn’t the case.

Because in front of him was Lily.

Lily wearing a baby pink tank top and a pair of shorts.

Barty wanted to devour her.

She had a look of determination and irritation on her face, and he couldn’t detect a single ounce of fear radiating from her. It was kind of freaky because he’s never had someone just not be scared of him.

Her flashlight was right on him, shining on his fuzzy chest and he watched as Lily slowly brought the beam of light up to his face. Her gaze was intense, and Barty still could not understand how she wasn’t afraid of him. Instead, it was more becoming like he was afraid of her. He's confused, because she seemed afraid when she first saw him, but now looking back on it, it was probably more like she was scared that she hit something rather than what she hit. How could she not be terrified of him? Was it the antennas? The red eyes? The fucking wings? He knew they could be fucking goofy looking but come on.

Either way, this was a first.

“Uh,” Barty said, tilting his head, bringing his hand up to try and block the light. “Did you need something?”

Oh, God. Barty wanted to smack himself in the face. Out of all the things he said, that’s what he picked? He literally had a fucking goddess standing in front of him, and he already made himself look like an idiot. Not only that, but this was his first conversation with an actual human in years. He spent his time talking to himself or talking to a large toad that he named Evan. So, this? Talking to a beautiful girl like Lily? It was a curse and a blessing.

“I hit you with my car,” Lily stated.

“Yeah, you did—Sorry, are you not freaked out right now?”

“Am I supposed to be afraid of some weirdo dressed up like a moth?”

“Excuse me?” Barty asked, glaring. A pretty girl with a pretty feisty mouth on her. He can work with that. "You think I'm a what?"

"A weirdo?"

"Who the fuck are you calling a weirdo?"

“You can’t expect me to think that Mothman is real.”

“You hit me with your car and you’re insulting me?” Barty asked. “Where is my apology, huh?”

Lily walked up closer to him, the flashlight held in her right hand. She was tiny compared to him, the height difference was throwing him off. She shoved her left index finger on his lower chest.

“Prove it.”

“Prove what? That you fuckin’ hit me with your car?”

“No,” Lily replied, rolling her eyes. She put her hands on her hips, the flashlight pointing towards a tree. “Prove to me that you��re real.”

Oh, she’s bold.

“I don’t have to prove you shit,” Barty said. “You should know better than to be in the woods at night alone, princess.”

“My friends have my location, so if you’re thinking about kidnapping me or murdering me, I wouldn’t try it.”

“What? You’re the one who came after me,” Barty replied. “If anything, I should be the one worried since you’re the one stalking me.”

“I’m not stalking you,” Lily scoffed. “I just wanted to figure out what I hit, and now I know it’s some guy dressed up like Mothman. Are you wearing stilts under that suit?”

“I am Mothman,” Barty deadpanned.

“Yeah, okay,” Lily said, sarcasm dripping from her words. “Anyway, I’m heading back to my car now, so don’t even think about following me.”

“What car? You totaled it when you slammed into me.”

“It’s my friend’s car,” Lily replied. “Not that you need that information.”

“So then why did you give it?”

“You’re nosy,” Lily pointed out.

Barty snorted. “I’m nosy? You’re the one who is giving out information left and right.”

“Whatever, grow up, look for a new hobby, and stop dressing up like a fake creature,” Lily said. “And maybe look both ways before crossing the road or you’ll get hit again.”

“Maybe you should try driving with your headlights on.”

Lily ignored his comment and turned around. She started to walk away from Barty, and she waved behind her, saying goodbye.

And for some reason, that one gesture pissed him off. He’s never had anyone just wave him off like that, or even insult him like that in five minutes. He couldn’t help it though—his eyes wandered straight to her ass. He watched as she kept walking away until she was out of view, and the only thing that kept replaying in his head was:

Lily had a nice fucking ass.

He never took himself as that kind of cryptid—one that drooled over humans or fantasized himself with one. He couldn’t deny what was clearly a fact: Lily was hot.

And look, Barty was aware that he explicitly said that he wasn’t going to prove Lily anything, but after watching her just walk away like he meant nothing was a slap in the face. He knew exactly what he was going to do and how he was going to do it.

He waited a while before figuring that Lily was in the car and was already driving down the road—she wasn’t that deep in the woods. He started to flap his wings and when he got good momentum, he ascended into the air and looked around once he was above the trees.

And there she was—driving that stupid car that she was in earlier when she came there with James.

He glided over to her car, hovering over it and keeping up with the speed of the car. He decided that now was the best time to just go for it—do what he’s known best for. He obnoxiously landed hard on the roof of the car and let out a laugh due to the thrill of scaring someone off.

However, his laugh was cut off because what he wasn’t expecting was for Lily to slam on the breaks.

Barty, losing his balance, flew off the top of the car and hit the pavement, rolling multiple times before finally coming to a stop. He let out a loud groan and fluttered his eyes closed.

“—Oh my God, are you okay?” Lily asked, running out of the car. She crouched down next to Barty and frantically started hovering her hands over him. It was like she couldn’t figure out where to start looking for injuries, but also taking in that he was clearly not human. “You’re such an idiot!”

“How are you so fucking normal about this?” Barty asked, voice cracking. He looked up at her and the headlights shining on her made Barty think that Lily was an angel, but so far her actions had been pretty demonic, in his opinion. She was in a state of panic, her eyes searching Barty’s and he could tell when it finally clicked for her.

“Oh,” Lily gasped, shaking her head and moving away from him. “Oh, you’re actually—”

“I told you,” Barty said.

“You flew on top of my car!”

“It’s not your car.”

“Does that really matter right now?”

“It does, because you hit me with your actual car, and now your friend’s car is fucked up, too.”

“And who is to blame for that?” Lily muttered. She took a deep breath and scooted closer to Barty, and this time, she was taking him all in. Her eyes wandered from his face, to his wings, to his chest, to his legs. “Jesus, Mothman—”

“Barty,” he said, trying to sit up. Lily grabbed his arm and used all her weight to pull him up gently.

“What?”

“My name is Barty,” he told her.

“Okay, Barty,” Lily said calmly. “It looks like you have some cuts on your legs, and I can look at them and clean them up if you want.”

“Nah,” Barty said. “They’ll heal on their own.”

“Wait, really?”

“Perks of not being human, I guess.”

“God, I can’t believe I hit Mothman with my car.”

“Maybe don’t go telling people that.”

Lily snorts. “No one would even believe me if I said that.”

“How come you’re not afraid?” Barty asked, looking at her.

Lily shrugged, her tank top strap falling off her shoulder. “I don’t know. There’s something about you that makes me feel the opposite, like I trust you.”

She stood up and wiped off her bare legs from the bits of gravel that were stuck onto them. Barty followed suit, standing up. He extended his wings to see if there were any cuts on them too, and when he saw small ones, he frowned. His wings always took longer to heal, so if he wanted to go anywhere, he’d have to walk until the cuts went away.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Lily asked. She carefully places her hand on Barty’s arm, and he almost melts into it because he’s never been touched by anyone like this before. Soft and gentle—feelings that Barty thought he’d never experience.

“Peachy,” Barty replied. “You should get home. It’s late.”

“I don’t want to just leave you—”

“It’s fine.”

“Will I see you again?”

“Why? So you can try and do another hit-and-run?” Barty asked, grinning. He couldn’t actually believe that Lily wanted to try and see him again, but it was almost too good to be true.

“No, I—I don’t know, I’m just curious about you. I can’t properly explain it.”

“There’s nothing curious about me.”

“You’re literally a monster—”

“I would prefer the term cryptid, sweetheart,” Barty said. “Monster is a bit rude, don’t you think?”

“My name is Lily,” she said. “Not ‘sweetheart.’”

“Lily, huh?” He said. He had to act like he didn’t already know her name, he didn’t want her to know that he’d seen her before and eavesdropped on her conversation with her friend from a couple of days prior. “Cute.”

Lily’s cheeks started to turn into a soft shade of pink, biting her lip as she turned her head away, refusing to make eye contact. “Oh, thanks, I guess. Your name is...nice.”

Barty smirked and brought two fingers up to her cheek, forcing her to look at him. She looked up and stared at him, and he had this whole witty comment that he was going to make, but he forgot all about it due to him getting lost in her. Seeing her up this close, seeing the freckles all over her face—he wanted to sit down and just count every single one of them if she’d let him. He wanted to tell her how he could get lost in her eyes which were suddenly now his favorite shade of green. He wanted to run his fingers through her hair and fuck, maybe he’d even try and learn how to braid hair or some shit if it meant being able to just touch her in any way that he could.

Lily was a light that Barty wanted to orbit around forever.

There was no other way to explain that Lily made him feel like he was meant to be here. Here, in front of her, as if being pulled away from her was going to destroy him.

Well, that was a bit dramatic.

However, he’d rather get hit by a thousand cars than have Lily leave.

But he knew that she had to.

“Thanks for the forced compliment, princess,” Barty said, dropping his hand. “But go home. We’ll find each other again one day, I’m sure.”

"And what if we don't?"

"Then we don't."

"I'm sorry, you know," Lily said, frowning. "For hitting you."

"See? Was that apology so hard?"

"God, you're so annoying," she murmured.

"And you think you're not?"

Lily smiled, and Barty wanted to see that every day.

Realistically, he knew that he couldn't. It wouldn't work. Anything Barty wanted never worked out for him, so why would this situation be any different?

"Come on, go home," Barty said.

Lily hesitantly nodded her head and walked over to the running car. Barty watched her get into the vehicle as he moved to the side of the road, not really wanting to get hit a second time.

If Lily looked back when she drove away, Barty wouldn’t know. He was too caught up in staring at the ground, already missing someone he hardly knew.

[the-chaotic]

「— A Stranger Savior 」

「Resume ― 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐟 a mysterious stranger appears and saves Tatsuya and Tsukumo from the accident? 」

「pairing ― Kohaku, Tatsuya and Tsukumo. 」

「カオス ― Writing from Kohaku's perspective is so difficult, I hope I did it well and didn't mischaracterize him. I also tried to keep a consistent chronology of events. 」

Kohaku is still trying to understand what happened.

He thinks that it was all just a hallucination induced by stress and anxiety, but seeing Tatsuya and Tsukumo being checked by paramedics and giving statements to the police, he knew that none of it could just be his imagination.

Everything about that week was sending him into a collapse; first Tsukumo talking about how Tatsuya was worried about him and Mugen and then the fight against the Amamiya brothers among the other many problems. Kohaku felt like she was going to explode at any moment.

When Tatsuya asked to meet with him the day after the fight, Kohaku didn't expect much, he knew that his friend would talk about the path Mugen was taking and he thought he was ready to hear everything that could be said.

But when Tatsuya, the person he valued most, confronted him with the truth, he knew he had enough.

Tatsuya was right, he was scared. Afraid of change, afraid of his friends slowly leaving, afraid of being alone after everything. And all of this led him to be trapped in a spiral of constant anxiety that was preventing him from see what's really happening around you, especially with Mugen.

His breaking point was when he arrived at the Mugen base to relax and by chance overheard a member who was there with another person using his name and that of his gang for dark things.

It was at that moment that Tatsuya's words reached Kohaku and led him to an epiphany.

The next moment, it was as if a part inside him said that he was ready to start accepting the changes that were happening around him, that even though it was difficult, in the end, he was not alone because he had friends who were there for him and that they wouldn't leave him behind. He hopes it's not too late.

Collecting her thoughts, Kohaku decided to go after Tatsuya to apologize about his behavior and the things he said before.

While looking for his friend, from afar on a deserted street he saw him with Tsukumo by his side, which was a perfect opportunity to apologize to him too.

“Tatsuya!” he ran to a stop in front of the two and took a minute to gather the words, “I…”

Kohaku couldn't finish before Tatsuya forcefully pushed him to the side and that was when he no longer knew if he had hit his head on the ground and passed out or if he was delirious because he had no idea how to explain what he saw.

He saw a car coming at high speed about to hit Tatsuya and Tsukumo when, without him knowing from where, a figure appears in the middle of the two, pushing them to the ground and, with inhuman strength, slams both fists on the hood of the car completely kneading.

The brute force of the pack causes the car to fly over the three, skidding frantically with a sharp sound at least 60 meters away, completely crushed and destroyed.

Tatsuya and Tsukumo looked as shocked as Kohaku at this moment. Looking back, the car was completely destroyed and smoking with a strong smell of gasoline, there was no way in the world that whoever was driving it could have survived.

Still in shock and a little desperate, Tatsuya called the police while Tsukumo looked for any injuries on the other. Kohaku got up to go to the other two when he quickly remembered the mysterious savior.

He looked around the space looking for the person when he saw them standing far away. Even with the distance, he tries to record what he can of his appearance, which isn't much. What made him even more incredulous was that even with the loose clothes, the figure didn't seem to have any muscles that could justify its strength.

In the end, none of the three came away with any serious injuries other than a few scratches on their hands. When the police asked for their statement, Tatsuya took the lead and said what had happened but not telling them about the person who saved them, he just said that at the last second the car lost control and overturned. The police officers accepted this excuse.

Neither Kohaku nor Tsukumo questioned him about why he didn't tell the truth, because they also didn't know if they should. Besides, who would believe it? Maybe it would be better this way.

They were walking away after being released when something caught Kohaku's attention. On the sidewalk, there was a blue and white bracelet with a broken clasp. He quickly picked it up without the police noticing and put it in his pants pocket. That accessory probably belonged to that mysterious person and was the only clue he had, so he decided to keep it. Something told him that it would be important to keep that belonging.

You punch the wall behind you in frustration creating a large hole.

You almost ruined everything.

You took a few deep breaths to regain control and stabilize yourself. You weren't sorry for saving those guys, but that action would have consequences and it didn't help at all that two of them were wearing the vest of the infamous Mugen gang.

I hope dad doesn't get upset.

You knew that as soon as you got home you would get a lecture from your father for being reckless, for exposing yourself like you did, but trying to think positive, your identity was safe thanks to the large hood of the sweatshirt you were wearing.

You take off the sweatshirt you were wearing and put it in the backpack that you had left hidden in an alley, although those guys had left by a different route than you, prevention was never too much.

Your phone vibrates and when you pick it up and turn it on, a simple and straightforward notification of a message from your father saying 'I'm waiting at home' glows ominously.

Well, Shit.

After putting away your cell phone, as a form of consolation, you touch the beloved bracelets on your wrist only to notice that one of them was missing.

Please, somebody kill me now!!

[apomaro-mellow]

Taking Care of Business (And My Business is You) 16

Part 15

If yall wanna watch the scene that inspired the motorcycle bit and some beautiful 90's animation, check out episode 5 of Golden Boy

Also some warnings for this chapter and the story going forward: pill tampering, unplanned pregnancy, abortion, religious guilt

The very next day, Eddie was spirited away onto a plane that took them down to Florida. Robin came along as it was supposed to be a mini vacation and a bit of pack bonding before Eddie had to do real jobs for the family. Eddie found flying to be less scary than he had expected, but maybe that’s because he had Steve next to him. 

The property they came to was right on the beach and bleached white from the sun. Eddie was hoping Steve packed sunscreen otherwise he’d be competing with the lobsters on the menu. There were attendants at the villa but for the most part the three of them were left to their own devices, which suited them all just fine.

This wasn’t just about relaxing. Robin had found some leads and Steve was helping to connect the dots. The trio sat outside on the patio, under an umbrella. The pool beside them glittered in the sun. Steve was a bit of a distraction, wearing an open shirt that billowed in the wind that blew. Between their cocktails were photos and files. One that Eddie had seen before. The man who had taken out Francesca Marini.

“Nando Orellana. He was found a few days after what he did, died of bullet wounds”, Robin said. “Before now, he just seemed a random thief, caught in the act.”

“But recently, we found out he worked for the Pedrazzi family”, Steve said before taking a sip.

Eddie blinked at the new information. “Pedrazzi…the guy I was roughing up last night said some Pedrazzi were in town.”

Another family being in the area, and Eddie knew for a fact that they hadn’t come to meet with the Marinis. That slight couldn’t be overlooked. Even brief visitors paid their respects to whoever ran the town. 

“My mother and nonno hated the Pedrazzis”, Steve said. “But they wouldn’t put a hit out on her so blatantly. If one of their men was under orders to kill my mother, they might’ve made an agreement with my father.”

“Like what?”, Eddie asked.

“Like trading me for something he wanted”, Steve replied with a shrug.

Marriages of convenience weren’t odd in the mafia world. But to marry your heir off to a family that was hated by the previous don and your own wife. It was spitting in the face of their values. Steve appreciated the look of disgust on Eddie’s face.

“We all know that man doesn’t care about the right way of doing things”, Robin said. “He doesn’t care if the Marini name is dragged through the mud so long as he comes out on top. He’s always been a Harrington first and only.”

“He doesn’t care about this family”, Eddie said, surprising himself with how much conviction was in his voice.

“We’re still looking to find a concrete connection”, Robin said. “Something that points to him having contacted one of the Pedrazzi or even Nando.”

“If they’re in town, it’s likely my father is planning something else”, Steve put his drink down. “And if that’s the case…my grandfather could be in danger.” If the objective was to arrange a marriage for Steve, first his grandfather would need to be taken out. It felt like they were running out of time.

Robin reached out and grabbed his hand. “We’re so close Stevie. And as soon as we can implicate your father, we can oust him.”

Steve held tight to her and smiled. His scent had started to turn bitter but it went back to sweet right away. After that debriefing, Robin went out shopping, leaving the two of them alone. The beauty of having the place to themselves was having no need to hide away and keep things limited to the bedroom.

Steve had him pushed up against a wall, not that far from the pool. “So what are we going to do with ourselves now?”

There was an image that hadn’t left Eddie’s head the moment Steve had brought it up and since they were all alone…

“You wouldn’t happen to have a garage here?”

Steve grabbed his hand and led him around, taking him to the garage where there were two sports cars and a motorcycle. He’d been confused at Eddie’s request until he saw the bike and remembered what he told the alpha about his induction night. Sure enough, the moment he released his hand, Eddie held him from behind, hands taking advantage of the open shirt to tease his chest. 

“You said you almost got off while riding”, Eddie breathed into his ear. He kissed down his neck slowly. “I want you to show me.”

The garage was closed and anyone who worked here had been in the business for years. They knew to keep their distance lest they saw something they shouldn’t. But still, there were a couple of windows and they hadn’t done anything this open since the car. Steve’s body warmed as his nipples were pinched. Then Eddie pulled his hands away.

Steve walked over to the motorcycle. He bit his lip as he ran his fingertips across the seat. He only took a second to think about how the leather would feel before he was pushing his swim trunks down and swinging a leg over. He looked up and Eddie was already palming himself through his own pants. Steve sat down and the seat was warm. He let out a sigh as he started to grind, letting his mind go back to that night. He had seen in that moment a future with Eddie. He lifted up and saw a tiny wet spot already on the seat.

With a grin, he turned the key in the ignition and got it started. His eyes met Eddie’s and without breaking contact, he sat back down. A moan bubbled forth from deep in his chest as the engine rumbled between his legs, vibrating against his lips and clit. That night he had seriously thought about stopping on the side of the road and doing this, just because he had been so keyed up.

Eddie would have smelled it on him right away then. Everyone would have. The thought of showing up in front of all those men, scented of arousal and then letting Eddie take his prize…show them all that only this alpha was worthy of him…only this one could make him like this…

Eddie grabbed Steve’s chin. When did he get so close? He kissed him, almost too gently for how far gone Steve already was but then he pushed his tongue inside.

“Bellissimo…go ahead baby. I wanna see you cum, wanna see it drip all down.”

“Eddie…”, Steve’s hand squeezed the throttle and he ground down even harder.

He felt Eddie’s hand come up to the back of his head, gripping it tight and forcing him to look into his eyes as he came, clit throbbing against the leather as more slick made him slide up and down. He turned the engine off and when he looked down the seat shiny with it, as was the inside of his thighs. Eddie bent down and grabbed Steve’s discarded trunks. Steve’s lust-addled mind was a little confused as he walked away and put the trunks on the counter, pushing a few tools out of the way.

But then he came back over and picked Steve up, an easy feat when his legs were jelly, and sat him on top of the shorts. He lifted a leg over his shoulder and pushed down his pants. He rubbed the head against him and Steve’s hips bucked, already trying to get it inside.

“You ready for me?”

“Always”, Steve moaned.

Eddie began to push in, his forehead coming to rest on Steve’s shoulder. It was so fucking wet and hot it was like his dick was melting in ecstasy. He got it honestly, how others vied for his hand, all just wanting a taste of what Steve’s body could offer. But they’d never get it, what it really meant to be in this position. To have this trust. Not only that but to have this duty, this sacred mission to bring him over the edge and love on him in all ways possible.

For the next week days were for Robin and nights were for Eddie. But sometimes Robin got nights and Eddie got days. Sometimes all three of them spent all day together. Walking the beach, enjoying the boardwalks, gazing up at stars, debating each other’s tastes in movies. Robin and Eddie found they shared a love for niche titles and a general disdain for rom-coms.

But while Eddie and Steve both enjoyed action movies, Robin found them mostly trite trash. Steve felt content on the way back home. He had both a right hand and a left now. And during their vacation, Steve made it clear that as his capo, Eddie answered and reported only to him. He wasn’t his father’s errand boy, nor did he work for anyone else.

To which Eddie replied that he’d been Steve’s since the moment he sponsored him. The first order of business was making their rounds and introducing Eddie and his new position. Of course, that info would have traveled already that the Marini heir had his own capo now, but it was only respectful to go out and introduce yourself. Word of mouth was only gossip until it came out of the right mouth.

Steve took Eddie out on the same collection route as before, this time, heads inclined Eddie’s way as they acknowledged what he’d already done for the family and what he would do. 

Going from sunny and warm Florida to Indiana in the winter was definitely a change. But it gave Eddie an excuse to adjust Steve’s scarf. Christmas approached and Eddie wondered what sort of gift a capo got their boss. 

Steve had been trying to think of gift ideas, the holidays were in a week and things would get busy for a while, when he suddenly had to rush to the bathroom as a wave of nausea hit him. Robin looked up from the card game they had been playing. 

“Did you eat something weird?”, she asked when he returned.

“No”, Steve said, throat wrecked a bit from vomiting. 

Robin’s eyes narrowed. That was the third time this week he’d gotten nauseous out of nowhere. She’d seen Steve through some of his more wild days, when he’d been drinking himself stupid. He didn’t do that anymore, so hangover sickness wasn’t it. And if he hadn’t been eating anything weird…

“Steve…”, Robin looked around before getting up. They were in one of the many sitting rooms the mansion held. And walls had ears. She whispered something in his ear and then sat back down. He was frozen for only just a moment before he picked up his cards and continued to play until the game was done. 

Once it was, he called Eddie and sent him out on a simple errand. When Eddie arrived, he could tell something was off about Steve but kept himself neutral. The three of them had dinner with Steve’s father and a few other members of the family. But afterwards, Eddie was sent home. Steve and Robin went up to his room and he let out a breath.

He took out what Eddie and brought to him earlier. Feeling extra cautious, he had taped the small box of birth control pills inside the water tank of his toilet. He took a pill from his box and then opened up his bathroom cabinet, taking a pill from the dispenser inside there. He put them both on the sink and used a shampoo bottle to crush them.

One broke apart into fragments, all the same color throughout, some of it powdery as it was crushed to a fine dust.

The other cracked like a shell, revealing a dark brown center. Chocolate.

Someone had tampered with his birth control. And now he was carrying Eddie’s pup.

Robin put a hand on his shoulder, giving him a moment to let him process it all. She could feel him shaking under her touch. He wanted to shout, to break something, anything. But whoever did this was waiting for this moment. Waiting to catch him in the throes of finding out and then��� and then he didn’t know what. Either way it was clear this was a part of someone’s plan.

So he needed to keep the facade that nothing had changed. He did turn into Robin’s arms and hug her tight though. No one outside this bathroom had to know that they both sunk down to the floor and that she stroked his hair as he cried.

Part 17

[arthropod-concoctions]

(AO3 - prev)

Jimmy wasn't in Tumble Town. Instead of the mesa he'd claimed to build his empire in, Jimmy found himself in a snowy field surrounded by gargantuan walls made of blackstone. Had someone pranked him by terraforming his surroundings while he'd been in the game? Probably not; there wasn't enough time for that. He'd been inside the game for five weeks, so that was... about fifteen hours for outsiders. Not nearly enough time to gather enough blackstone to do all this.

I still can't believe I died so early again. To an enderman of all things! Jimmy thought to himself. Well, no point lingering on that now; he'd apologize to Tango the next time they played. Right now he wanted to get out of these walls and see something familiar.

He flew to the top of one of the walls to look around, but he only saw forests, no familiar scenery. He shuffled across the wall to see more-- shuffled, because whoever had dropped him into this snowfield had also put a thick, cumbersome coat on him. It got in the way of his movements and made it very hot, so he began to take it off-

Wait a minute. He was in the middle of a snowfield, yet didn't feel cold at all; in fact, he was getting very warm. Wasn't that a symptom of hypothermia? Suddenly, he noticed that his arms were very pale, unhealthily so.

“Oh no,” he whispered to himself, and put the coat back on. “Right, change of plan: I need to get out of here.” He activated his elytra again, and flew away from the blackstone construction.

He didn't have to fly long to find signs of civilization; he quite quickly came across a large street with many buildings along it. It was deserted, and didn't look like the building style of any other emperors, but Jimmy landed anyways. Then he decided to do something he probably should have done earlier; he checked chat.

Strangely enough, his chat didn't manifest as the book and quill he'd designed, but instead as a small red device. Still, it showed him the most recent messages of the server he'd ended up in:

Tango joined the game

<joehillssays> Howdy Tango, welcome back!

<Cubfan135> Tangooooooo

Tango was here! Jimmy didn't know the other names, but that didn't matter; finding Tango would already be very helpful. He decided to send him a private message; better not to alarm these strangers.

You whispered to Tango: tango

Tango whispered to you: tango

You whispered to Tango: im lost

Tango whispered to you: im lost

You whispered to Tango: where are you

Tango whispered to you: where are you

The fact that his messages to Tango immediately got sent back was worrying. Maybe Tango's chat was bugged, and somehow bouncing messages back instead of showing them to him...? Regardless, Jimmy sent him one more message.

You whispered to Tango: im so sorry about that death btw

Tango whispered to you: im so sorry about that death btw

Unsure of what else to do, Jimmy made his way to a bench and sat down. He was beginning to sweat; would it be safe to take off the coat yet? His arms still didn't have any colour in them, so he decided against it.

After a few minutes of waiting, someone flew past on elytra, noticed Jimmy, and landed in front of him. It wasn't Tango; this was someone wearing a brown sweater, with curled horns jutting out from his blond hair.

“There you are! Why weren't you responding to chat? And what are you in Scarland for?” the stranger asked Jimmy.

Jimmy wasn't sure how to respond; this person didn't seem at all concerned about the fact there was someone new on the server. He decided to get straight to the point: “I think I'm freezing to death.”

“Oh jeez. The deep frost finally got to you, then?” he stepped towards Jimmy, and put his hand on his forehead.

“I mean, you are a little cold, but I thought that was just part of your bit this season,” he said. “You feel, warmer than the last time I high-fived you. And- dude, you're sweating! Tango, buddy, I know hardcore worlds can get intense, but did you forget the difference between hot and cold?”

Jimmy hadn't ever high-fived this man. “I thought getting warm was a symptom of... did you just call me Tango?”

The man's eyes widened slowly. “...Yes? That's your name, silly!”

“No it isn't,” Jimmy said, and frowned. If he got mistaken for Tango, did that mean...?

“Oh. Okay, that's fine, uh... do you remember my name?” he spoke slowly, and had a concerned expression on his face.

“No. Look, dude, I think something went-”

“WHAT!?” the man interrupted Jimmy. “You don't even remember your best friend Zedaph? Okay, you are clearly not feeling well. Take that big coat off, I think you're overheating.”

Jimmy did take the coat off, leaving him with a short-sleeved undershirt. His upper arms were even paler than his hands; they were almost blue. Zedaph took the coat and draped it over the bench they were sitting on.

“Tango, you just lay down for a moment. I'll stay here with you, and I'll call X when he gets online, and then he'll get you checked out, okay?”

Jimmy started to lay down, then changed his mind. “No, I feel fine, but dude, I'm not Tango. My name's Jimmy, and me and Tango were-”

“Ah-bah-bah-bah, don't get so worked up, just get some rest,” Zedaph interrupted him, and pushed him flat onto the bench. He was surprisingly strong; or maybe Jimmy was just lighter than he was used to. Zedaph sat down on the bench next to him, and began writing something down, muttering to himself: “Okay, symptoms: amnesia, weird body temperature, talking in a London accent for some reason...”

Jimmy sighed, and laid down. How had he ended up in this situation?

---

One moment Bigb was rushing up the stairs of the Box, trying to help Ren. The next he was... sitting in his lap?

When he turned his head to see Ren's be-sun-spectacled face right next to his own, he immediately jumped up. He also squealed, which would've been embarrassing if not for the sound Ren made, which was louder and lasted much longer.

“He-hey, Ren! Fancy seeing you here,” Bigb said to Ren, trying to sound casual. He had not expected to see him again; he'd expected to end up back on BasicCraft with Tom. Maybe this was the afterlife? He was pretty sure Scott had mentioned an afterlife some other time.

“What sorcery is this!?” Ren responded, not sounding casual in the slightest. “Why- How is there an impostor of the king in thine own throne room?”

“Impostor? Aw, I thought you liked the matching dog ears,” Bigb replied, scratching his own ears. Yep, still furry. Then, noticing the small crown on Ren's head and the throne he was sitting on, he added: “Wait, are we doing this again? Uh, my lord.”

“Well, of course I like the ears. But-” Ren paused, and tilted his head at Bigb. “Ah, I see. You are my old self. My PEASANT self! Oh, how it doth pain me to see this reminder of how I once was... BEGONE!”

“Wow,” Bigb said. “Rude.” He'd remembered Ren having a dramatic flair as king, but he was fairly certain he'd been nicer last time.

“I am the king, and I can be rude to whomever I doth wisheth! Now leave me, I must ponder!”

Well, two could play at that game. “You know what?” Bigb said. “You look stupid in that big cape.”

Ren's face dropped, and Bigb saw him shrink down into his throne. “Oh,” he said, much quieter than before. He looked utterly crushed by Bigb's remark.

Bigb stuck out his tongue at him, and turned around to leave... but Ren's sad face made him feel bad. So he turned back around and said: “I'm sorry, my lord. That was mean.”

“Yes... yes, I'm sorry as well,” Ren replied, wiping a tear out of his eye. “I should not be so rude to my own image... but I can make it up to you!”

“You can?”

“Yes! From this point onwards, I declareth thee... the royal stunt double! If ever I need a vacation from ruling, or I get a bad haircut or something, I will calleth upon you to take my place for a meeting or two.”

Bigb raised an eyebrow. “And what's in it for me?”

“Huh? You... you'll have a position in the royal court of King RentheKing! That is the greatest honor in all of Hermitcraftia!” Ren called out, spreading his arms wide.

“Right, of course, of course,” Bigb responded, then scratched his ear again. “...Are you sure I look enough like you for that though? I mean, we don't even have...” he trailed off, as he took a good look at his own arm for the first time since getting here. Why on earth was he white?

“Yes, of course, you are my splitting image! Come, stand beside me,” Ren ordered, so Bigb approached him again and stood next to his throne. Ren grabbed his chat and turned on the camera.

“Look, our faces are identical! As soon as you don some proper royal garb, no one will tell the difference.” Sure enough, the screen showed two Rens: one with a crown and cloak, and one with the floral shirt Ren wore at the start of Double Life.

“Oh. Yeah, that makes sense,” Bigb said slowly, staring at the screen. “I have no questions about this at all.”

---

Martyn felt the characteristic thud of getting dropped into a new world, and opened his eyes to see he was laying in a flat field of grass.

“Are we going again already? Surely not, it's been like thirty seconds since the last game. I didn't even hear the rules this time,” he said to himself. He got up, and immediately saw that wherever he was, it was not at the start of a Life game. Giant rectangular pillars loomed before him, and he turned around to see two huge seahorse statues. He also noticed he wasn't wearing his own clothes; instead he was wearing a dark blue dress, and his limbs were pale green and felt numb.

He was undead like Cleo, and was wearing a dress like Cleo's. “If this is some kind of punishment for being mean to my soulmate earlier, it's-”

his statement to nobody in particular was interrupted by the sound of fireworks nearby. Martyn immediately whirled around to find the source-- was someone coming at him with a firework crossbow?

It almost seemed that way when an explosion of green and yellow lights in his peripheral vision made him jump; but the person who emerged from the explosion was unarmed. They looked a bit like Skizz, but with a significantly more eccentric fashion sense. They smiled at Martyn.

“Howdy Cleo, welcome back! How was the death game?” they said in a voice that sounded nothing like Skizz's.

Oh, so that's the game we're playing, Martyn thought. It was best to stay under the radar until he'd figured out what was going on, he thought; so he decided to play along.

“Oh you know... you know how it is with death games,” he replied, talking slower than usual, hoping to mimic Cleo's voice. It seemed to work, as Cleo's friend didn't look suspicious of him.

“Not really. It's been a little while since I did one. Maybe I should ask Grian to invite me next time,” they said. “Anyway, I'm about to go mine out some nether tunnels, do you want to help?”

“No. I'm gonna go... recover for a bit,” Martyn said. The more he was alone, the longer before someone caught on to the fact he wasn't actually Cleo. It's a good think we have similar accents at least, he thought.

“Okay, see you around!” the stranger responded, then used a pull-string firework rocket and elytra to take off into the sky. Martyn watched them fly away for a few seconds, then turn around and go back towards him.

“By the way, Cleo, I have a lot of blackstone now, so if you ever need any for your builds, just tell me and I'll give you some, alright?”

“Yeah, alright. Look, can you just-” Martyn was interrupted by the sound of yet another person flying in using elytra. He turned around and saw Scar landing on the ground and walking towards him, leaning on his cane. This was someone he knew-- he wasn't sure whether that was better for him or worse.

“Howdy Scar! Did you have fun in the death game?” Cleo's friend said, while grabbing a totem of undying from their inventory. That worried Martyn; he really didn't want to end up in the middle of a fight right now.

“Hi Joe,” Scar said to them. Then he turned to Martyn: “Look, Martyn, something's gone horribly wrong, as you can probably tell-”

“Who's Mahrtyn?” Cleo's friend-- Joe, apparently-- interrupted.

“This is,” Scar responded, gesturing at Martyn. “Wait, did he not... had you not told Joe?”

Martyn didn't respond. Well, there goes that plan, he thought. Joe stared ahead for a moment, squinting, then a smile broke across their face and they turned to Martyn.

“Oh my gosh, Cle- Martyn, that's amazing! I'm so happy for you! Is it okay if I call Quinn?”

Martyn didn't know who Quinn was, but evidently Scar did. “No, Joe, that's not what I-” he started to say, before breaking down into laugher. It was a loud cackle, very un-Scar-like; and Martyn suspected he knew why.

Joe's smile faded. “...What?” they said accusingly. “Did I not understand this correctly? Also, Scar, why are you British now?”

When British Scar had recovered slightly from his laughing fit, he said: “No, Joe, listen- first of all, I'm not Scar, I'm Grian. Somehow we all got swapped into each other's bodies when coming back from Double Life. So this isn't Cleo at all, this is Martyn.”

“Oh, okay,” Joe said. Then they blinked and said to Martyn: “Wait, no, cancel that. You mean you aren't my good friend Cleo?”

Martyn sighed. “No, sorry dude.” At this point, pretending otherwise would only make things worse. Martyn held out his hand-- or rather, Cleo's hand-- to Joe. “I'm Martyn, nice to meet you.”

Joe stood still for a second, thinking, then shrugged and took it. “It's a pleasure,” he replied. “Welcome to Hermitcraft, I guess.”

(next)

[modern-day-bard]

Worth The Feeling

A/n: Hi! This is my first time writing fanfiction and I will admit that the first few chapters are a little rocky, but hang in there and I promise it’s a fun little read. I tried to structure this story as a cutesy, lighthearted romance novel, and I think I found that pace later on. With some of the chapters containing adult content, I would ask that minors do not read or interact with my posts. There is explicit smut and fluff, and some intimidation in a couple of chapters. Other than that and the age gap (MC is 26, Javi is in his 40s), there are no other major trigger warnings. I also purposefully did not give the main character any physical descriptors, other than her being shorter than Javi, because I wanted whoever is reading it to be able to picture themselves. I found it too difficult to write the story from the perspective of “y/n.” I tried to choose a name that was hopefully racially ambiguous enough so anyone could connect with the character. Finally, if you do choose to read my story, thank you and happy reading! Summary: Ava Cohen is a 26-year-old production assistant working tirelessly to achieve her dream of one day becoming a film director. As hiatus from her last project comes to a close, she returns to set with Norwick Productions, whom she has worked with for the past four years. After a major fo paux on the first day of work, Ava is worried she has offended the star of this next production: Javi Gutierrez. She will soon come to realize, this couldn’t be further from the truth. When the cast and crew travel to Italy to film on location, the seriousness of what Ava is feeling becomes all too real, just as a new career opportunity lands in her lap. As tensions run high, watchful eyes set in, and her career is put at stake, can all of this be worth it in the end?

Content Warning: 18+

Chapter 1

I wonder if it's possible to drive with your eyes partially sealed shut. It should be illegal to be awake this early. 4:30am call time on the first day? I've been on more productions than I can count, though I fear this one will finally be the one to take me down. At least this morning we're on the sound stage as opposed to on sight in Italy. Maybe most 26-year-olds would be jumping at the opportunity to fly abroad with all expenses paid. But to me, the thought of being stuck on a steel tin in the sky for any amount of time is enough to make me consider throwing in the towel on this job all together. But I'm not going to think about that right now. I take a deep breath as I pull onto the lot. The first day on set is always the most chaotic. The amount of people who seem to forget how to do their jobs during hiatus grows every time we return. I can't judge of course, because I may soon be one of them. I've been with Norwick Productions since I was 22, and I'm already feeling burnt out after only four years. Granted, the burn out could be due to completing grad school homework until one in the morning, and arriving here before the sun came up. Regardless, my first stop is craft services for coffee. After I'm caffeinated and signed in, my duties pile high. As a Production Assistant, I'm given any and all tasks other employees didn't have time to complete. Sometimes the lack of time to complete the task was due to a lack of desire to complete it, which could lead to some pretty unfortunate chores for me. Picking up dry cleaning, faking tears over the phone to convince the fire department to give us a permit, walking talent's dogs, cleaning up said dog's poop, you name it. I even had to shave our leading lady's armpits. Twice. They take the "other duties as assigned" line on the job application to the extremes.

Talent is arriving in two hours and we still don't have everyone's trailer set up, so that is my first stop. The one thing I pride myself on is that despite being a major movie buff, I had an uncanny ability not to get starstruck. No matter how often their name was trending or how many awards these people have won, I always saw them as part of the crew. Was I a little rattled on my first set? Sure. But when you realize how helpless a lot of these rich actors are, the sparkle sort of wears off.

I typically never got a chance to read the script beforehand. It isn't a requirement of PAs, and in fact, we're not even allowed to see them every time. So until I have the call sheet in hand, I'm not sure who I am setting up these trailers for. And in my dazed need for coffee, I forgot to grab a call sheet (a huge no-no for PAs, but I'll blame it on last night's homework bender). From what I saw inside a few minutes ago, it looks like the first scene has something to do with the CIA. There were giant print-outs of the lettering all over the wall. For now, all I have to go off of is the CIA and the impending doom of travel to Italy in a few weeks. I finish prepping the two lead's trailers with a welcome letter, various snacks, and a copy of today's filming schedule. I check my watch: 6:00am. Still a half hour until they arrive. I tip my head back, taking in as much of my coffee as I can as I head toward the door of the trailer.

I swing the door open, and crash right into something hard. The movement sends my coffee splashing down the front of my shirt and dripping onto my shoes. "Shit." I hiss, looking down at my soaked t-shirt. "Oh my god, I'm so sorry." A sincere male voice causes my head to snap back up. In my sleep-deprivarty, I didn't connect the fact that I had crashed into a person and not a wall. The man in front of me is taking off a pair of sunglasses, a mortified expression on his face. A face that I don't recognize. He's certainly attractive, and possibly in his forties? His dark brows are pulling together in concern, his brown eyes deep with sympathy. A rush of embarrassment creeps up my cheeks as I realize that I had walked directly into his chest when I was trying to leave the trailer. I take a step back so I don't have to crane my head to look up at him. "I'm sorry, I wasn't looking." I say quietly, warmth still coating my cheeks. "You're sorry? Don't be. I wasn't looking either." He steps inside, ducking his tall frame under the door to enter. "And your poor shirt..." He gestures to my now semi-sheer t-shirt. I put my coffee down on the small table and cross my arms over my chest. "You don't have to worry about this trailer," I say, changing the subject. "I already prepped it." "Oh, uh, thank you." He looks confused now, and he starts shrugging off a backpack I didn't realize he was carrying. He tosses the bag on one of the chairs at the table. I notice he doesn't have a walkie either. He must be new, and sure to get a talking to by Lloyd if he's dumping his stuff in a talent trailer and strolling around without a walkie. "When were you hired?" I keep my tone casual, conversational. I find that I can deal with embarrassment better if I keep the other person talking. "About five months ago, I think." He starts to run his hand across the table between us, watching his own movements carefully. I get the sense that he's trying not to look at me. "Well, welcome aboard. I should warn you that the director is pretty strict about PAs walking around without walkies. Trust me, I got my ass handed to me during my first week. Super embarrassing." I roll my eyes for emphasis. He looks up at me then, his smile warm, and his tone carries a humor that I don't quite understand when he says, "Thank you. I'll keep it in mind." "No problem. Oh, and I'm Ava." I extend my hand and he takes it. His hand envelopes mine, and I realize in that moment that he is quite a bit larger than me. This realization, combined with the warmth on his palm makes me feel funny. "I'm Javi." He smiles again. "Good to meet you," I say, taking my hand back to check my watch once more. "Talent should be arriving soon so wherever you need to be, I would head over there now." I walk toward the door as I say it, taking extra care when opening the door this time. "I'm sorry again, Ava." He calls after me, his voice still just as sincere as the first time he apologized. "Don't worry about it!" I call back, closing the door behind me. I take the few steps down from the trailer, breathing a sigh of relief to be out of that moment. However, that sigh gets sucked back down my throat when I see the two words in bold on the front of the trailer I just left. Javi Gutierrez

And if my cheeks were red before, now they are maroon.

Next Chapter

Series Masterlist

[calamitaswrath]

Cal Lucia plays Fire Emblem Path of Radiance: Chapter 12

Phoenicis and Kilvas, nation of the bird people. Now those I've definitely heard about, seeing as I got a friend who's Normal™ about them

Dragon nation of Goldoa. . . why is the dragon in the artwork that accompanies that explanation so ripped?

Considering that this boat journey is said to take weeks and weeks, I feel like this might also be the place to set some oneshot fics.

Ike and Mist have a little conversation about race and racism. I like how Mist admits to having been afraid of The Other™ at first, it adds to her character

Mist, Nasir has pointy ears. Do you really think he's human?

So what kind of Laguz is he, anyway? Can't be a bird, because I know that those got wings, even in their humanoid form. He probably isn't a beast/cat, because then he'd have different ears. Dragon, then?

Come to think of it, he has a marking on his forehead, just like Soren. . .

Right then, let's go over the base conversations.

Ilyana: ohh, some neat little backstory about how she came to travel with the merchants! These base conversations are nice for that. Even if you don't get a unit's supports because they're not deployed, they at least can see a bit of their character outside of that this way.

Zihark: that guy's just teasing his backstory. Based on his overall vibe, I don't think that that's going to be relevant for the main story, so I wonder where it will be explored, whether in base conversations or in his supports. Or Radiant Dawn.

And the last one. . . Sothe! Oh, I definitely already know this character! He's the character that Micaiah starts out with in Radiant Dawn. And since he's currently looking for someone. . . is he already looking for her?

Pirate attack! Can't have a ship map without pirates. Or. . . well, shouldn't, seeing as there are some without them in other games

And here are the birds. Since I have a friend who's obsessed with them I've def heard of them before, but I guess it's another matter whether those particular ones are there

Ah, same rules apply as with other flying units. Figures. I wonder though if it's gonna be the same for untransformed ones?

10 units only, hmm. . . three less than the previous chapter. Now I'll really need to pick and chose who to bring

Jill is here! And judging by the fact that she's an ally unit, I think this is where she's gonna join? . . .I mean, I say that, but since I looked at the strategy for this chapter beforehand, I already know that she does

MIST LEVELLED UP AND GAINED NO STATS?!?!

Ah, Jill is of the self-recruiting variety. And she has a last name? That's unusual, pre-3H

Oh, that was a good recruitment exchange. "I'm gonna join you! Let's kill those half-humans!" "Uh, no? How about you tone down the racism?" "Shut up, I'm gonna join you"

The boss mentions a King Naesala. . . yeah, that is a name I have heard before. Seems popular in the fandom, as far as I can tell.

Well that was a pretty short chapter. Huh. Fair enough though, can't have every chapter be as wild as the previous two. And makes for a welcome change of pace

More trouble brewing, and all just because Ike needed to leave the ship.

Uhhh, dragons! And generic ones, too. That's def uncommon in FE games

Kurthnaga. . . I heard the name before. And surely, the fact that he looks so similar to Soren doesn't mean anything.

Gareth! Now that is. . . a very red character.

Do you think that whoever drew the illustrations for the dragons in this game. You know. Really likes dragons?

For such a short encounter, this whole sequence really reads like it does a lot of setup for stuff that's supposed to come later

Ike muses about Beorc and Laguz, and realizes the inherent moral complexity of the world and people

Nasir and Soren both just so happen to not be comfortable near dragons (or rather Nasir is, and Soren just skedaddled). I wonder why.

Elincia, you must realize that you're getting nowhere with Ike. And I mean, I get the yearning on a general basis, I really do. So I'm probably not the most qualified to call you out. But still!

[the-alice-of-hearts]

DickTim Week Day 1 Soulmates

Told myself weeks ago that I was only gonna write for day 6... I lied! Here is my entry for day one posted on time for @dicktimweek

Rated T, 1329 words, no archive warnings would apply, it's more of an outline than a fully fleshed-out fic though. Hope y'all like it!

There was a time when soulmates were rare when people might never meet their other half. Then the internet came around, and finding the person in the world who wore the same mark as you was much easier. 

Dick grew up knowing that his chances of finding his soulmate were above average since he was a performer, but still, it wasn’t like he needed his soulmate. He had loving parents and they weren’t soulmates, they were just in love. Then fate played her nasty little trick on him and he wound up flying through the air in a completely different fashion. 

Dick knew that there was a slim chance that his soulmate was within the hero community, and he couldn’t afford to bring someone into the life just because fate decreed them tied to his unlucky self. So Dick made a decision sitting on the top of Titans Tower three days after Jason’s funeral, whoever his soulmate was, he wouldn’t seek them out, he’d hide his mark, and no matter if he ever found them, he’d keep silent and let them live out their life safely. 

---

Tim was lucky, one of the luckiest kids in the entire freaking world. He knew who his soulmate was since he was six years old. He sat on the knee of ten-year-old Dick Grayson of the Flying Graysons and saw the little bird on his inner elbow. Tim stared at the little matching bird on his shoulder again and gave a soft smile. His soulmate was gonna need a friend, and maybe, just maybe, if Tim went to school then he would get to see that nice boy who had the perfect smile and was so very nice. So he had to keep being good, and he had to keep learning and getting better at school so he could be a big kid. 

Then he found out the best secret. The wonderful amazing secret of Robin! His Robin, his soulmate. So Tim watched and waited and kept an eye on Robin, and by extension Batman. Once he knew though he realized there was one flaw to his plan. It wouldn’t matter how good at school he was, and it wouldn’t matter how much he worked on getting better if he couldn’t keep up with Dick. So he enrolled himself in gymnastics and martial arts classes, learned more languages, and tried his hardest to be worthy of Dick Grayson. 

Then Dick left. And Tim was heartbroken. He just got the hang of actual parkour, and Dick just left and another kid showed up in Bruce’s life and then he was Robin! As though he had a claim on the name, as though he had any right to wear the yellow cape! 

Tim waited and he watched, the way he always did. And then Jason died, and Bruce went off the rails, and Tim assigned himself as a grown-ass man’s emotional support fifteen-year-old… This at least had the benefit of getting to see his soulmate, yay! Unfortunately, this also meant he was subject to a very drunk Dick explaining how he hoped that his soulmate never joined the life because fate owed him that at least… 

Tim cried himself to sleep that night. He had been trying each time Dick visited to find a natural way to broach the subject of their matching soulmarks, but after that night Tim vowed to keep his mark hidden. Dick would be forbidden. 

Tim watches as Dick keeps himself sober because he needs to be a “Good Big Brother™” and god doesn’t that hurt even more. 

---

Dick started to hate himself, he was a goddamn nineteen-year-old and he was crushing on the fifteen-year-old who for some god known reason came into their lives and was gluing the family back together. So he threw himself into alcohol first, if he could blame the feelings on being drunk then he wasn’t really hurting anyone. But after a night where he almost confessed his feelings and instead went on his rant about soulmates, he realized that wasn’t working. So he stayed sober, and he went all in on being Tim’s brother. If he just kept saying it it would eventually be true. Who cares that Tim has living parents, and that he wasn’t getting adopted by Bruce? Who cares that Dick only wants to press his lips against his skin and see him blush. Fuck all of that, he can be responsible, and he can be good, and he can stop himself from being an idiot. 

Then Jason comes back, and Tim almost bleeds out in the Tower, a sacred place, a place that Dick should have been in to protect him. Tim is bleeding and Dick is carrying him to the med bay and he presses a kiss to the sixteen-year-old's temple and promises himself, if Tim lives then he’ll tell him his feelings. 

---

Tim wakes up from blood loss in the Cave and realizes two things right away. One, Dick isn’t there, two, he’s not wearing a shirt… He knows that it was Dick’s voice he heard when they transported him from the Tower to the Cave and all he can think is how mad is Dick… 

He waits three days before Alfred and Bruce will let him move upstairs, another two before he braves looking at his phone. It’s two weeks later before he hears from Dick. Hope you feel better soon. A five word text that feels so impersonal compared to their earlier texts. Five words to confirm for Tim that Dick has seen his soulmark, and to know what it means. 

Tim heals, and he gets back out there, but Nightwing doesn’t call him to have Robin join him on patrol. Dick doesn’t send him the memes that he sees and thinks of Tim. There are no brotherly messages about needing more sleep or if he wants to grab ice cream after patrol because Dick happens to be in town. He isn’t even invited to the Tower until a month and a half after the attack, and that’s by Raven and Kon. Tim knows that Dick is icing him out, but he doesn’t know how to fix this one. He should have told Dick years ago, but he just wanted to fix the family. 

His parents die, Jason is rehabilitated, for the most part, Damian shows up and Dick still isn’t close to Tim anymore. Then Bruce disappears. Tim is seventeen and he’s lost everyone, and then his soulmate tells him he can’t wear the Robin colors anymore. He sets out on Brucequest. 

---

Dick fucked up! He iced Tim out after seeing the little bird on his shoulder. He took so long to come to terms with the fact that the universe took his soulmate and turned him into a weapon then broke him. Jason came back and went insane, and Dick did his fucking best okay! It’s not easy okay! He pushed his fucking soulmate away for so long and he was in his grasp finally and he pushed him away again!

Tim disappeared and Dick was blaming himself. He kept his ear out for any news and had people keeping watch. Every night he would trace the little bird on his inner elbow and make deals with the universe. Bring him back and I’ll never let him forget how much he means to me.

Tim comes back and literally falls into Dick’s arms after being kicked out of a window. 

Dick: How did you know I’d be there to save you? Tim: You’re my soulmate, Dick. You’ll always be there for me.

Dick doesn’t even care that he’s lying. He pulls Tim into a searing kiss. Needing to finally feel his lips against Tim’s and know that he’s alive and okay. They’ll have a proper conversation later, for now though? Dick is holding his soulmate and he couldn’t be more content.

[ab--n]

Danganronpa: Friends and Foes with stars above Prologue

One fine mansion

(quick author note blue mean Verins thoughts reacting to her surroundings not describing them, while orange means key info)

Do you feel REAL? Do you feel accomplished? Do you feel if you were just born in a different time and place, that everything would be slightly better? I felt like that for who knows how long. Maybe if I could just change something. If I could had just stop them, I would be better. Would the person who gave me this letter would know about this feeling.

As I looked at the letter one more time, I felt an aura that I can't really describe. There’s no time now, let's meet this person.

“Hm? Do you want to know more about me? Okay then… My name is Verin. I know, I’m a bit off. I would rather not overshare.”

“Someone gave me this letter when I came back for groceries. It says to come to the lily garden near the pond. It also says a specific time too… I’m worried frankly. That garden in particular is infamous… But it says that the mysterious person will help with any problem I have at the moment. Maybe just this once.”

_______________________________________________

As I look at the garden’s gate and with a moment of hesitation I fly them open. I took a step forward and was knocked unconscious.

Things can only get worse from here. 

I suddenly woke up on a metal floor with my left foot chained to the wall.

My senses were taken by a horrible smell and I scurried to get back on my feet. In my panic I did not realize the muffled sound from the other side of the room. When I did I saw someone familiar. Then they start talking. “ Ugh.. Hm? Who are you, may I ask?”

 “Me?.... Verin, call me Verin. Who are you?”

“You can call me Dragon Knight, or DK for short.”

We stand in awkward silence. Suddenly he took his hand and ripped the cuffs off. I was confused until I saw his hands,

Purple sharp claws… so that’s how he ripped them off so easily. I should ask him to do the same for me.

“Hey, can you cut mines too?”

“Sure, young one.”

After that was a slash and the sound of clicking of metal hitting the ground.

“Thanks! Also, quick question, do you know where we are, I haven't seen a place like this anywhere..”

“No, I haven't seen a place like this anywhere. But it looks like Shiver star. I wonder why that person took us here out of all places?”

“Wait! You got that message too?”

This is bad. It seems like this was planned. Wait… how does he know what shiver star looks like? I’ll ask about that later. 

“My letter wasn't originally mine… it belong to one of my children. I’m glad I took it to check it instead of being ignorant.” 

“Wait, what? Whoever was the sick person who brought us here tried to kidnap a child?”

Great! Even worse. Now I should be careful just in case. Who knows if the person who brought me and DK here wants to hurt us.. 

“I.. Really don’t know. Our main focus should be getting out of here.”

He’s right, and plus I don’t want my newly bought food to spoil.

DK seems to be investigating the room that we are in. This place is dark.

Other than the moss and rotting plants. Nothing seems to be of importance here in my side. Wonder if DK got any luck…

“ um.. Excuse me DK, but have you got anything so far?”

“ No, nothing in particular on my side except this.”

There was a poster on the wall that had writing that neither me or DK understands. DK, confused as I am, puts his hands on it. The poster, well now the hidden switch succumbs easily to the pressure.

As the room starts to shake one of the walls moves to show stairs up.

The stairs themselves looked much better than the rest of the room. 

“I did not expect that to happen. Verin, are you okay?”

“Yeah I’m fine, What.. happened though?”

 “Turns out that the poster is a hidden button for this passageway. We have no time to lose so let’s go!”

With his voice covered in worry, Me and DK went up the stairs albeit carefully. After what felt like forever we got up the stairs only to find two more people coming out of a room of their own. 

A doll-like girl and a waddle dee with freckles. Both were surprised to see us. The former quickly got over it and skipped over to us, she then began to introduce herself.

“Hi! Dolly is happy to meet you! What are your two guys names?”

“My name is Dragon Knight, and this moth-like girl is named Verin. May I ask who that waddle dee is over there?”

“Hmm? Oh you mean Archie! Yes, that is his name! Archie was with Dolly when we were put into a ugly room! ”

As Dolly rambled on about how her and Archie got put into this situation, Archie is staring at a yellow monitor on a nearby pillar. DK caught wind of this and asked the kid about it.

“Hmm? Oh! I don't know why but I got a bad feeling about this thing. It seems off. I know this place is much better than down in those dungeons, but a high tech monitor in here looks out of place! Do you understand?”

“I do, but I doubt it’s something to worry about-”

DK got suddenly interrupted by the yellow monitor turning on. A care free voice starts talking.

“Check check one two three! Can everyone hear me? Yes? then perfect!”

The voice sounded like it had no worry in the world, But I can still hear malice from it. Does this voice belong to the same person who kidnaped us?

“Welcome freaks to this mansion! The ULTIMATE mansion! Sixteen participants are put in groups of four, and are trapped in these attack-proof rooms. And the only way out is to kill someone and get away with it! Boy isn’t that interesting and exciting!

The voice said that so nonchalantly, and so fast. It’s like this is they have said this millionth time. 

“Oh, and poison will slowly be put into the rooms, only two rooms will be free of it! No more poison will come when someone eventually kicks the bucket. Welp, that is the end of this introduction to the game! Monodoo out!”

I feel like everything’s going too fast, I feel like my consciousness is fading… maybe when I wake up, it will all be a weird dream. To kill or die, I hardly believe it.

_____________________________________________________

Next

i lied, today is the day that I'm done!

Thank you to those participating! character featured are...

Verin belongs to @the-chaos-axolotl

Dragon Knight belongs to @smaaenart

Dolly belongs to @ilikesillythingswooo

Archie belongs to @george228732

and thank you for reading! This is the first time i made fanfic so just tell me if I wrote one of these goobers out of character. I finished this early surprisingly, anyway. I hope you have a good day!

[wrightfamilyagency]

Just as I got back into writing, I got distracted by, of all questions, "Hey, are there any canon clues to exactly where in London Gressenheller is so I can pick out the closest tube station?", and the answer to that is YES but it's maybe a little inconsistent possibly, and I doubt I'm the first person to do this but hey, I also discovered along the way another massive mistake I made in past chapters based on a misunderstanding of canon evidence, SO LET'S GO.

The Layton games in general are very careful to be vague with giving their major locations exact addresses, but twice in the series they give hints to Gressenheller's. The one in Pandora's/Diabolical Box is the most blatant by far, though:

I drew a little L where the icon is that marks your location for this brief prologue before going to Dr Schrader's home. And of course I had to see if I could find this layout on a London streetmap, especially since we know it's near the Thames, so I found an online map to have a look and, oh hey, I found this exact bend of the Thames with the three visible bridges and even that park with its distinctive lake in the middle!

At first I was disappointed because I couldn't see any kind of match between the streets, until I overlaid the PDB map over the street map and...

Oh my gosh, they DID trace a real map to make this! And then simplified the roads and altered the dimensions so an exact overlay is impossible, but enough of the actual streets are left that you can make out where they came from!

So, based on that, Gressenheller is located somewhere in here:

And if we zoom in on that specific block:

So, there you go. Gressenheller is somewhere in this section of Soho in London, between the bounds of Oxford Street, Tottenham Court Road, Old Compton Street, and Wardour Street. Who knows how accurate to the IRL Soho the idea of a big university like Gressenheller being there is, but that's apparently where it's located. xD And all I needed from this endeavour was the nearest tube station, which is clearly Tottenham Court Road, so that's my question answered!

The only other game that gives us a hint as to Gressenheller's location is actually PLvsAA, and again in the prologue. Hershel and Luke start the game in Hershel's office in Gressenheller, then Espella comes by and is immediately kidnapped, and Hershel declares that kidnapper+kidnappee are "headed for the Thames". We then cut to our first playable area of the game:

Again, it's simplified and altered, but the use of Tower Bridge means it's easy to find on a real map.

I was actually surprised there's an IRL park on the south bank by Tower Bridge, though I can't confirm the existence of any little overlook like the game location. Besides, the game cut off a lot of the park for buildings here, as well as disappearing the Tower of London on the north bank (y'know, the thing Tower Bridge is named after)... But this map is more stylised than the other so it's gonna be less accurate to real life.

So if Gressenheller Uni is in Soho as established, what is with the route Hershel and Luke apparently took to end up south of Tower Bridge?

On the far right, Tower Bridge. On the far left, Tottenham Court Road station and the square I outlined above. The distance on foot between them seems to be at minimum 5.1km (around 3.1 miles for you imperial-users), and requires not only crossing the river but following it for a significant distance. I'm sure Hershel and Luke could easily manage it physically (unlike me xD), but it seems weird to follow a flying woman into the open air above the Thames (plus crossing the river at some point for whatever reason), keep track of her up to Tower Bridge... and only then lose sight of her, and not have any idea where she was headed? It very much implies to me that Shu Takumi - or whoever wrote that specific part of the prologue - mentally placed Gressenheller as south of the Thames, and if not directly south then south-east of Tower Bridge, so that Hershel and Luke (avoiding the park and its police presence) arrived at the river and lost track of said flying woman immediately.

However this inconsistency even came about, I guess it doesn't really matter, because we have what we have, and little things like this are open to individual interpretation. It's not like this is the only weird location-related inconsistency in these games.

As for my interpretation, I prefer the idea of the Soho location because it's actually very close to the IRL British Museum, and in-game closer to wherever the hell Kensington High Street (along with the fictional London Museum) has been rerouted to put it so close to Scotland Yard (which is south of Soho irl, closer to the Thames, while Kensington and its high street are way off west of both). For PLvsAA, I prefer to think of the 'office' we see there actually being Hershel's home, to explain both the new area and why he has Luke still hanging out with him so late at night.

Also, all my research informed me that Hershel is supposed to somehow have a home with a front door right on street level as opposed to the apartment I've given him in this AU, but in my defence... how is he affording a full house of his own in the middle of London long before taking in Flora, and PLvsAA confused me because it's a lot less clear they're supposed to be in Gressenheller in that prologue when its your introduction to two series at once, and that shot in Eternal Diva where OT-Luke is collecting Hershel's mail goes by so fast of course I almost immediately forgot it, and the only other time we see that door in LS/SC, Rosa is sweeping the front steps for some reason despite telling Emmy later on she works at Gressenheller which implies the random front door she was sweeping was part of the university and not a house belonging to someone else (it certainly doesn't appear to be part of the university building based on what we see of it!), and she seems to immediately appear afterwards in Hershel's office anyway talking about Dean Delmona looking for him which implies she's been at the university the whole time and not off sweeping random house fronts, so it looks like the game developers just put her on Hershel's doorstep purely so she could get his letter from Luke even though that doesn't make any sense-!

cough cough

I can't justify the Laytons having moved to a smaller place but also I've consistently written them as being in an apartment so now I have to just go with what I've written I guess. SIGH.