#also what a mood tm

[unproduciblesmackdown]

au where when jared tells evan that was like the exact formula for secret gay high school lovers evan is like oh my god i can't undo that with a deft [no homo] & jared is like i can do evasively deniable gay subtext....there's a reason i was the only cit with keycard access to the (what's Gay in Camp....) computer cluster this summer (heteronormativity retired!)

[capinejghafa]

i can't tell if it's bc of the last book i read but the very secret society of irregular witches is honestly so charming and so cute... i hope i love the rest of it.

[daughterofzeus-the-novel]

I know some of classicsblr dislikes the way Madeline Miller modernized the Illiad for Song of Achilles but I loved Circe and I'm really liking this one so far

[subconsciousmysteries]

love my bf love my life but that one song by Corey Taylor gives me war flashbacks to all the 48 combos I've loved before and I secretly listen to it sometimes when I'm bored with healthiness and I want to feel pain again

[noviceunicorn]

bro but also like, as someone with autism and adhd who suffers from Not Allowed to Eat syndrome, milk, especially whole milk, can really help you get a lot of nutrients you need relatively quickly enough that you don't develop BAD BAD NO EAT as easily as you would with solid foods.

*drinks a gallon of milk in 6 minutes in order to gain superautism*

[evilminji]

Okay, but... now I'm wondering >.>

@the-witchhunter We talked about Danny being Morningstar's feral, probably engineering oils and ectoplasmic goo covered, mad scientist/himbo hybrid (attack) purse dog. His special lil guy.

But!

I seek your Knowledge(TM).

From second hand accounts? He seems to HATE the hypocrisy. The blaming HIM for humanity's own choices. The rat race and endless song n dance of "Righteous Good VS. Cartoonish Evil". Because it let's humanity paint themselves the helpless victims. Because it's all surface level. Because it is not so easy to escape the ugliness of your Sins, yet they keep trying to scapegoat him.

Fuck um.

He was tired of it.

But? He still has CONSIDERABLE POWER. It's probably written down. And the Ring Of Rage? Is proooobably not the loveliest of artifacts? I imagine, like the Crown, it's NOT leaving Danny alone. One of those "we don't CARE if there is no throne left to sit upon, you WILL wear us, as King" sort of systems.

It genuinely would not and DOES NOT matter, if not a single soul in all the Zone bows to him. Did he defeat the previous holder of their Right To Rulership? Yes or No.

If No, fuck off.

If Yes, new monarch.

Is it hurting him? Not the rings problem. Nor the Crown's. Heavy is the weight, etc etc. But! DANNY would certainly care. He is... is ANGRY all the time now. Has no idea who would even MAKE this bullshit ring. Why JUST Rage? Yeah, it makes ghosts stronger, but at what COST?

He can't even get rid of it!

......by himself.

Luckily, he's still clear headed enough to know that he's NOT in this by himself. And it's amazing what "mom, dad, this ring is trying to drive me insane. Help me" in a terrified and tearful voice, can brush over. No one threatens their baby and all that.

It would honestly be hilarious, seeing the extended Fenton clan decend like LOCUSTS on Pariahs Keep, searching for clues, terrifying the local ghosts, if... if he wasn't so tired.

God he's so tired.

It's Aunt Alecia who... "politely encourages" a passing scholar to lend them the book they need. Took the poor sucker right out of the sky. Guy never stood a chance. RIP.

He learns he has to head..... over? Like... 27 that-ish way, then up. Huh. 27 WHAT?

Realities, apparently. He's in the wrong bundle. Branch? Neighborhood? Eh. Clan Fenton rolls back out, he packs his bags, and hilariously enough? Goes off to the devils night club. Hopes he likes rings. Or hates them.

Thankfully, being "king" means the Zone? Kinda... humors him? Like... it still has RULES(tm). He can... can FEEL that now. But it's willing to bend some for him, if he asks. And anything NOT against the rules? If it's in the right mood? He need only ask. It's weird. Being suddenly so powerful, yet NOT, at the same time.

Cause none of it's his.

All he has is the Zone's attention. The ability to ask pretty please. If you don't mind. And then? The highways between... ALL will just? Shift and change for him. He can see how it went to Pariah's head. The Zone is pretty agreeable. Is by nature Amoral, cause it's not a Being, it's... well, it's the Zone.

And everyone wants him to ask things. Do things. Demand this or that. Use this power.

Maybe he doesn't WANT too! Maybe he didn't WANT to be king! Doesn't he have the right to say NO? To refuse? Why do they think he OWES them service? An eternity of politics and people trying to kill him, for something he never wanted in the FIRST PLACE.

He's so tired.

The nightclub's pretty cool.

So he comes to ask, politely of course, cause the guy's probably busy, if Morningstar could... dunno, fix or destroy it? Want a ring, maybe? Also he heard you MADE the stars. Huge fan of all of that. Can I ask about the process? Or are you in the middle of something?

And? Lucifer? Turns around, from where he's Leaning Seductive Yet Elegantly(tm) to see... scrawny. Tiny corpse child. No... half? Corpse? Alive. Dying. Alive yet dying. Huh. Well, that is different. And here he didn't think he'd get see anything NEW. You, child, are NOT a zombie. What are you?

Halfa.

I have no idea what that is. What do you want?

He gets shown the ugliest, crudest, peice of shit ring imaginable. A genuine foul little curse. Really stinks up the place. He destroys it, obviously. This club has STANDARDS. Hope that wasn't important?

Kid just smiles the biggest fangy lil grin. No. No it was not.

Obvious, lie, but cute lil teeth. He'll allow it.

He gets dragged into talking about the stars. And talking. And talking. Mostly bragging and explaining. Kid hangs off his every word. Follows him around as he makes his rounds. Asks good questions. Completely focused, dispite the booze and barely dressed dancing all around him.

Lucifer can't help notice the crown.

Lovely little thing. Space ice and star dust, glittering like jewels and light catching the mist. If he remembers right... that one iiiiiis..... not Limbo, it's.... Zone! That crown is the Zone, it changes to suit the wearer. He recognizes the vibe. Awfully young, aren't you?

And.... it all burst forth. He didn't even need to press. Use persuasive words and honeyed tones. Like an inflamed, festering wound. The merest brush is enough to spill everything.

Negligence, greed, blood lust. Bigotry and xenophobia. A tyrants endless quest for power. Ah, humans. They truly don't change do they? Realities away, dead or alive. Now they're harrasing a child. He honestly looks miserable. Whereas just a moment before, listening to Lucifer talk about his work on the stars, his soul practically GLOWED with light. A tiny little star unto himself.

.......maybe it's the big ol "I'm you BIGGEST FAN" eyes. The sad wet cat aura. Perhaps the scrawny "could snap you like a twig" teenager, all elbows and knees. The fact he is, in fact, NOT human; for all that he once was. But?? The kid? Is... not terrible company.

He'd even go so far as to say? It's like having a pet intern.

He can sleep on the couch.

Tell you what, you stay here? I'll keep taking about stars and YOU can do the chores I don't feel like doing. I'll take care of you and all that.

And Danny? Honestly was sold at the word "stars" but? This sounds like a phenomenally terrible idea... and he has yet to meet one of THOSE he hasn't made out sloppy still with, so deal! But as a minor, that DOES make you his new gaurdian for the next four-ish years. He's legally obligated to finish schooling.

Ah.

.....well shit.

(Just? Local stressed 14-15 year old Ghost King does RESPONSIBILE thing and finds Adultier Adult. With more qualified Adult powers. Unfortunately for everyone, the adult is Lucifer Morningstar, night club owner. Even MORE Unfortunately, said ghost kind has pack bonded with the Nice Star Man, who saved him from the Bad Ring, and effectively offered to let him crash on his swanky couchs.

Now Morningstar has to? Somewhat VAGUELY pretend he gives a shit local schooling system, as he puts his charge INTO it. Actively giving waking terrors to the magical community. What evil plot is afoot? Where did he get this tiny minor death god? What is his end goal FOR said child?

No one knooooows~

But Lucifer is just doing this cause he's a Being of his word. He hates the tedious minor chores he'll be foisting off onto Danny. And? Most importantly? Look at that face. *shoujo sparkly eyes of Star Sempai Noticed Me!* it's like having a golden retriever puppy. Ffs he has STANDARDS.)

(It'd be hilarious to watch the hostile 5th dimensional chess DC characters have going on in the background, all while? Danny is like? Man! Isn't this universe GREAT? Everyone here is so CHILL! And nice to me! I'm so relaxed now! Finally, I can finish my education in peace.)

@hdgnj @hypewinter @lolottes @babbling-babull @nerdpoe @mutable-manifestation

[dadsbongos]

do u think u could write some of ur own personal headcanons for laios? i love the way u write him, it seems almost canon!

anon you dont know what fire youre messing with

also thank yew hehe :>

general headcanons:

Laios likes babysitting but does NOT want to be a real papa, he adores the idea of being the Cool And Strange Uncle but just imagining having to raise a whole person from scratch terrifies him

Usually conks out as soon as his head hits the pillow and he’s a damn heavy sleeper, he strikes me as someone that gets the dad snore when he’s a bit older

Likes doing physical activity in the moment, maintaining his stamina/strength n whatnot. But HAAATES the aftermath, he will not stop bitching about how gross he feels when sweaty

People scare him but I think men specifically scare him more than women because he mainly associates “men” with his old boarding school and military peers and his dad. Meanwhile the most callous woman he’s personally dealt with is like. his mom… who wasn’t particularly menacing and he doesn’t seem to resent her as much as he does his father

Most definitely called Chilchuck “chil” in their early days together and got his nuts sacked for the unintentional disrespect

Doesn’t drink often because the taste bugs him but when he does decide to, he drinks to get drunk. So it has to be a special occasion

The type of older brother to tell Falin food fills up your body from your feet to your head and when you’re full to your head you die

modern headcanons:

Definitely the type to unironically use little emoticons like :) or :] but his favorites are the cute ones like :3 , ^.^ , and :0

Would’ve played barbies with Falin as a kid and enjoyed it more than Falin did lol

If he were out with the group (marcille would have to threaten his life though, he would HATE “going out”) and Marcille or Falin deferred to him to deal with creepy men he’d feel like a superhero about it

Borderline mandated to have a high impact phone case by Falin because he’s GOT to be dropping that shit all the time. I just know it (projecting)

Would probably dislike resident evil as a series but thinks the premises are cool

Bouncing off that: he’s a big Undertale and Deltarune fan (definitely had a thing for Toriel at some point and probably thought sans was kind of overrated). Has ambivalent feelings towards fear & hunger, likes the atmosphere and item preservation and monsters but the assault scenes and overt brutalism ick him out from recommending it

Would go his whole life without an autism diagnosis until eventually held at metaphorical gunpoint by his friends, just for his parents to go “oh yeah we had you tested as a kid but didn’t want you using it as a crutch”

If monsters weren’t real he’d be cryptid autistic just so everyone’s on the same page

Cryptids major and ocean creatures minor type autism

I don’t think he’s straight by any measure but before he has the Realization, he’s the epitome of the girls gays and coleman meme

Segue omg: he has no desire to think more about his sexuality or gender than “i feel x” or “i choose y”. I think he identifies as Man(TM) but in a “its harder to explain i want to be a bog” way. If you referred to him with feminine pronouns or called him “girl” he seriously wouldn’t give a shit 

nsfw(?) headcanons:

Could never do casual, you would have to be committed or only know each other VERY distantly and only do it once. His ass wouldn’t know how to read your relationship if you were trying to do friends with benefits (he’s also very concerned with hurting people’s feelings so just the notion of accidentally doing that to someone he’s intimate with would kill him)

May seem strange coming from a bitch always talkin about fucking him, but I think Laios would actually have kind of a lower sex drive. Like he maybe doesn’t get needy very often but also isn’t NOT in the mood, so if you proposition him and he’s into you he’ll be like “okie :3”

That being said, when he does feel needy he’s NEEDY. It’s debilitating, he genuinely can’t do or think of anything else until his poor wee is taken care of :( poor guy aww

I can see him being a virgin until his early-mid 20s and having no shame about it (good for him go king, virginity is nothing to be ashamed of it literally doesn’t matter)

Also by virgin i mean rice purity test score of like 97

Swears he doesn’t like having his cock worshipped (says its weird and embarrassing) but he’s so flustered n drooly and babbles the whole time

Biter 

[zukosdualdao]

so, this post was originally born from a post i saw a couple of months ago that was deriding people for criticizing katara’s main role in lok being a healer when that was never all she wanted to do but liking the scene where she heals zuko in sozin's comet. at the time i thought about responding directly and decided against it, but i have since scanned through transcripts of every instance (i could find; it's possible i could be missing something) of katara healing someone in the show and how they respond. (you know, like a normal and well-adjusted individual. lmao.)

anyway, aside from katara explicitly stating that she doesn’t only want to be a healer, another aspect of why people don’t like that this is how her story goes in lok is because of the way healing is treated in the atla narrative.

Katara: Aang, you're burned! Let me help you. [Katara heals the burn on Aang's arm.] Aang: Wow, that's good water. Sokka: When did you learn that? Katara: I guess I always knew. Sokka: [Sarcastically.] Oh ... Well then thanks for all the first aid over the years. Like when I fell into the greaseberry bramble. [Angrily.] Or that time I had two fishhooks in my thumb!

this comes, of course, after aang accidentally burns katara and she learns she can heal through her waterbending by healing her own hands. then (after comforting aang despite being the one who got hurt, not that i'm bitter), she heals aang after he gets burned in his fight with zhao. and like... there's not so much as a cursory thanks in this scene.

to be clear, because i can already hear some responses in my head and i am making a preemptive strike: i'm not saying that when other characters don't thank katara for her healing, they're like, the worst people ever for not doing so or there aren't other ways at different times where they show their appreciation. what i am saying is that it feels like this sets up a long pattern of katara's healing specifically being taken for granted, and it makes me especially uncomfortable when i see her healing as a sort of metaphorical parallel to the emotional labor often expected of her in the show, especially because this and being The Avatar's Girlfriend/Wife is more or less what she's relegated to in post-canon.

also, i have to note sokka's line here. i don't want to come down on him too hard for this, because it's obviously being written humorously (and does genuinely make me laugh, for what it's worth, if just for the inherent ridiculous nature of two fishhooks), but his sarcastically saying thanks for all the help over the years when katara says she always knew (which is supposed to be her saying it just somehow instinctively came to her) does feel like another mark in this pattern. but i also really read this as sokka trying to lighten the mood after a Difficult (TM) day, so i cut both him and the writers some slack for it.

Meanwhile, back at the Outer Wall, Katara attempts to heal a member of the Terra Team. General Sung: What's wrong with him? He doesn't look injured. Katara: His chi is blocked. [Stops healing.] Who did this to you?

i find it interesting that katara has sort of naturally fallen into a token team healer role, to the degree that we don't even see them ask for her help or her agree to it; it's just automatically assumed that she will. and i mean, on the one hand, it's fairly standard to have an Assumed Healer in a fantasy action setting like this, where people will get hurt in combat and therefore the narrative needs someone whose job is to help them. the problem for me is that the show kicked up such a fuss about how women shouldn't just be allowed to be healers, and yet it's still the role no one but katara ever fills. aang is also a waterbender! why couldn't she have taught him healing, too? i genuinely think it would have added a lot to the story, but katara is The Girl (TM), so healing is what she (and only she) does, what's expected of her, and again, with very rare thanks for it.

Katara stares open-mouthed at Jet, her hands hovering near her mouth in shock. Snapping out of it, she withdraws water from her water skin, with which she covers her hands, and it begins to glow as she kneels down next to him. Cut to a shot from over her shoulder, with Jet glancing at her while she rubs her hands over his chest in an attempt to heal him. After rubbing his chest three times, the glow fades, the water stains Jet's clothing, and Katara looks back over her shoulder toward the rest of the group. Katara: This isn't good. Smellerbee: You guys go and find Appa. We'll take care of Jet. Katara: We're not going to leave you. Longshot: There's no time. Just go. We'll take care of him. He's our leader. They stare at Longshot in surprise. Jet: Don't worry, Katara. I'll be fine. [Smiles a little.]

Cut to a closer shot of Katara placing Aang's body on Appa. Katara opens the vial around her neck and uses water healing on Aang's wounded back. The rest of Team Avatar, Kuei, and Bosco all look sadly and in anticipation. The glowing from the spirit water stops, and Katara starts crying, assuming that it was not enough to save Aang. Aang's tattoos glow for a second and Aang groans. Katara, overcome with joy that Aang is alive, looks at him, who smiles a little, and she holds him closer.

writing about these together because i have less to say about them. i'm definitely not going to fault jet for not thanking katara when she tries to heal him as he literally lay dying, or aang for not having the mind to do so after she brings him back. but i am still going to fault the narrative for putting her in a position where healing is just inherently expected from her and yet very rarely allowing her to feel the emotional toll of that or to feel constricted by it. and when she does struggle against the weight of it (not necessarily of being a healer, but of being expected to be kind and good and uncomplicated with no room for other aspects of her identity, which are very tangled up in why she is The Healer) in episodes like the runaway or in the southern raiders, she just... does not receive a lot of support from the people she should be most able to rely on.

Katara: Maybe we should go upstairs. [Helping Aang up.] You need a healing session. Back in Aang's room on the ship. Katara bends some water onto the scar left by Azula's lightning attack. Katara: Tell me where the pain feels most intense. Aang: Mmm, a little higher. Uhhh! Aang briefly flashes back to the battle at Old Ba Sing Se where he rose into the Avatar State, then back to reality. Aang: Wow, you're definitely in the right area there.

not much to say here, it's just another instance where it would have been so easy to slip one thank you in, and the writers just... do not. the reason i think it bothers me so much with aang specifically is because katara is supposed to be both aang's physical healer and his emotional crutch in a way that she's not written as being for, say, toph or sokka. he's sometimes shown appreciation for her emotional support, but he still comes to rely on and expect it in ways that do not always feel healthy, and knowing that, it bothers me that he shows even less appreciation for her healing, because it's just what katara is there for.

A figure resembling the Painted Lady glides over the water on a carpet of fog and enters the village. She steps into a hut where several people are sleeping on the floor, and bends over each of them in turn, healing them with a blue glow. Her last patient is the mother of the little boy seen earlier, her son sleeping at her side. He wakes as the Painted Lady turns to go and silently follows her out the door. Little boy: Thank you, Painted Lady.

this is a genuinely sweet scene in which katara does receive appreciation and genuine thanks for her healing, but i think it's also worth noting that katara is not being recognized as herself here. still, i am genuinely very glad that it's included in the episode because (again, unless i am missing something) it is the first time katara gets thanked for her healing.

The scene cuts to show Appa landing on the edge of the battlefield. Sokka and Katara help Hakoda onto the ground, and Katara starts trying to heal him. Katara: How does that feel, Dad? Hakoda: Ah, a little, better. I need, to get back to the troops. [Attempts to stand but is too weak to.] Ahh! Katara: You're hurt, badly. You can't fight anymore. Hakoda: Everyone's counting on me to lead this mission Katara, I won't let them down. [Attempts to stand again but can't.] Ahh! Sokka: Can't you heal him any faster?

they're in a high intensity situation, and sokka is Stressed because hakoda is supposed to lead the mission, so i, like, Get It, but "can't you heal him any faster?" does strike me as another moment in which katara's healing is being taken for granted. i think it's something that would bother me a lot less if this was an isolated incident in the writing, but *gestures vaguely at whole post*.

Sokka: [Brightening.] Dad! [Rising and approaching the two.] You're on your feet again. Hakoda: [Sitting down; somewhat weakly.] Thanks to your sister.

that being said, in the next hakoda and katara scene, there is this very sweet moment, where hakoda might not be thanking katara directly but is showing a lot of appreciation and admiration for her skill in healing (and though she's not in the dialogue i included, she's around to hear it, which makes me happy.)

Katara: It's gonna take a while for your feet to get better. [Stops healing.] I wish I could have worked on them sooner. Toph: Yeah, me too.

once again, i'm not gonna fault toph for wishing katara could have healed her feet sooner, because she's been in pain all night, but the writers could have very easily (as they could have in any of these scenes!) chosen to include a perfunctory 'thanks' here, and they just didn't. i know this is getting repetitive, but i swear it's because it's largely more me being mad at the writers than the characters, lmao.

there are also a couple of scenes in which katara doesn't heal anyone, but her healing gets brought up by aang.

Aang: He doesn't look sick. You okay, buddy? [Appa groans and Aang pulls out Appa's purple tongue.] His tongue is purple! That can't be good. Katara, can you heal him?

to be fair, aang asks here, and it's not like aang gets defensive or angry when katara says appa needs medicine (and also to be fair, appa's not even actually sick, lmao, katara's being slightly trickstery), but it's another instance where katara is automatically positioned as the person who is and should be responsible for healing.

Aang: [Chuckles.] Well, not over over. I mean there's always Katara and a little Spirit Water action, [Turns to Katara.] am I right? Katara: Actually, I used it all up after Azula shot you. Aang: [Disappointed.] Oh.

i actually don't mind this so much as a writing moment, as i think it's a lot more intentional wrt aang not always conceptualizing the reality of the violence he’s facing. still, it’s another instance of katara’s ability to heal and care for him being taken for granted, and i find it especially notable it’s in of the last significant moments they share together (the other being an argument as katara urges him not to run away from the reality of their situation with ozai) before they spend the rest of the finale separate until they’re kissing without a word at the end.

and then there is the zutara healing scene, where katara heals zuko after he interferes and takes azula’s lightning to the chest when she’s aiming for katara.

Cut to Katara as she rolls Zuko on to his back and begins healing him. Zuko opens his eyes, feeling the pain lessen, and smiles weakly at Katara, who smiles back as she sheds a tear.

Zuko: Thank you, Katara.

Katara: I think I'm the one who should be thanking you.

it seems fair to me to say that one of the reasons the motifs of healing in the zutara are dynamic are so appreciated by their fans is because of how it contrasts to a lot of moments where the work katara does with her healing is under-appreciated. for one thing, it happens as part of a mutual exchange—katara heals zuko after he gets hurt saving her. (this also somewhat calls back to their scenes together in the crystal caves in the tcod, where she offers to heal his scar after they are trapped together and zuko extends her empathy.) it’s based in reciprocity. it’s also, as shown here, one of the few moments of explicit, heartfelt appreciation and thanks given for katara’s healing.

[capricious-bastard13]

I'm also a pretty short story writer and often do one-shots or if I ever write "sequels", they're just as short. The very few often I tried writing long stories, I ended up not finishing them.

I think what would really help is finding out what inspired you to write the story in the first place and if it still doesn't help, then stepping back could help too. Although, I do have to say, stepping back is a double-edged sword since anytime I've stepped back from a work, I just end up ignoring it completely.

I've found out that the reason is mainly because I've already exerted out all of my enthusiasm for the idea/story in the very first spurt of writing it, and trying to keep that train going is the hardest part other than the writing itself. Hence, the reason why I write short fics.

And the longer I write, the more I start to hate it or I start to become indifferent about it, mainly because for me, what I want to happen hasn't happened yet or is taking a long time before it can happen and anytime I try to view it objectively, it simply becomes boring, dull, or simply, it looks like nothing of interest is happening.

Now, I've never participated in NaNoWriMo (and to be honest, I still don't understand the concept of it, I just see that word and associate it to November). And I wouldn't say that hating your work isn't normal. So far, I unfortunately haven't found a true solution or "tip" to helping out on how to not hate a work. I know what I shared may not be helpful in anyway, but I just wanted to say, no, you're not the only one who ends up hating their work, lmaoooo.

I don't know if this is normal as I'm usually a short story writer and rarely do longer pieces and I never, ever plan my plots in advance. Recently for NaNoWriMo, I gave myself a much smaller goal but the story completely took control of me. For the first two weeks, I loved every bit of it. It wasn't well-written but I was having a GREAT time, even had a plot develop itself naturally with an ending in mind.

But at the end of the month, I started to hate it as much as I had previously enjoyed writing it. I'm not sure what happened and I'm just wondering: do you think this is normal for longer works? Do people end up hating something even though they loved it at first? Is there a way to prevent that change in feeling?

I can't say for sure of course, but I wonder if this is more a result of National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) than it is a result of writing a longer work.

The thing about NaNoWriMo is that you're on a pretty strict schedule (if you're trying to hit 50K by the end of the month at least). That schedule and your desire to achieve that end goal can have the impact of driving you to work harder and push further than you might under regular circumstances. Combine that with a month that might have family obligations, work stresses, school assignments and exams or whatever else might be happening in your life, and you can end up pretty damned burnt out.

Especially if you're enjoying what you're doing, it can be really easy to overextend yourself to the point of exhaustion. If you keep going, maybe out of a sense of competition or duty or stick-to-it-ive-ness or whatever else, you can go right past exhaustion into the kind of cranky, dissatisfied, mental and emotional exhaustion that takes something you used to love and turns it into something you hate.

See also: why I quit this blog a year ago.

If you're in that state, or even if you just hate it because you're tired of looking at it, I recommend putting your work away for a while. Give yourself a month off. Come back to it sometime in the new year and look at it with fresh eyes.

If you still hate it at that point, then it might be more of a plot issue than anything else, and you'll probably be able to spot it pretty easily even though it's completely invisible right now.

[thesparklingwriter]

unspoken thoughts

tags: modern au, wrothesley x fem! reader, roomates to lovers, reader goes on a blind date with a karen (tm), biker! wrio!!!!

word count: 1.7k

masterlist | taglist

“Hey, Bun. How was work?”

You meet Wriothesley with a level glare, as you fumble with locking the door. Maybe rooming with him had saved you money on rent, but what you’d saved had definitely been replaced with extra stress.

“I told you to stop calling me bunny.”

“Perhaps if you didn’t blush like that when I do, I would stop.” He replies, nursing a cup of tea and a book as he relaxes on the sofa. You glare at him again but lower yourself onto the sofa beside him.

“New delivery?” You ask, referring to the tea.

“The one that was delayed,” he says. “It was worth the wait.” He raises the cup to you and you take a sip, taking stock of all the flavours you can before Wriothesley begins to talk about it. One day, you’re sure he’ll find out that you actually have no interest in his teas, and that despite the fact he drives you mad, he’s actually just nice to listen to.

“Seems it was worth the money too,” You say once he’s finished talking. “Definitely belongs in the top ten.”

“Maybe even top five,” he replies, mostly to himself as you stand up. “More work?” he asks lightly, expecting you to grumble about how you're tired of always working, and you wish your manager would stop expecting you to work overtime for free, but this time you smile coyly.

“I have a blind date,” you say quietly, trying to ignore the way he’s looking up at you. “My friend set me up. He’s apparently a very refined, classy guy from a good family, and my friend says he thinks we’d get along well.”

“I wonder what your friend defines as a good family,” Wriothesley says, sipping his tea. “Money? Influence?” He’d never truly considered what you’d look for in a partner before, in fact, he liked to try and avoid the thought if possible. He prefers to only think about the things which affect him directly. But now the topic has been brought up, he suddenly feels strange. If coming from a good family is important to you… That would immediately take him out of the running, wouldn’t it?

“I dunno.” you shrug. “Sometimes my friend just says things. Anyway, thanks for sharing your tea. I’m gonna go get ready.”

Wriothesley watches as you walk away, sighing lightly as he takes another sip of his tea. He’s lived with you for so long that he never truly thought about how his life at home would change if you got a boyfriend. Would it mean he could no longer share his teas with you? Would he have to stop letting you sleep on him when you watch movies together?

He sits with his thoughts until he hears your keys as you leave your room.

“I’m off. Don’t stay up for me.” You smile, and Wriothesley can't help but hate himself for hating how happy you seem to be leaving. He sips his now-cold tea and nods.

“Have fun.”

“You’re grumbling. What’s the matter?” you say, pulling your jacket on.

“I am not grumbling.” he shoots back, standing up to go to the kitchen. “My tea got cold. That’s all.”

“You are so grumbling right now.” you grin. Wriothelsey doesn't know if you are purposefully ignoring his bad mood or if you're so excited about your date that you simply don’t notice, but he doesn’t really like either of those answers. “See you later!”

And then Wriothesley finds himself alone again. Maybe he’d taken it for granted that you’d always be around. Maybe he isn't as okay with the silence as he’d made himself believe he was. 

Even though you told him not to wait up, he finds himself unable to sleep. He tells himself it's not because he’s worried, it's just because he had a rare lie in this morning. It's natural for his body to be slightly out of sync, right? You’re perfectly capable of taking care of yourself, and today is just like every other day and–

His phone is ringing. It’s odd for him to get called by his manager so late in the day, but it's also not rare. 

It's even rarer for it to be you calling.

“Wriothesley?”

“Hey, Bun. What’s going on?” He can’t help but smile a little. There you are on a date, but you’re calling him.

“Are you busy right now?” 

It's only then that he notices the wavering in your voice.

“I’m not. What’s the matter?”

“Can you come and get me? I… I’m sorry, I just don’t know who else to call.” 

You sound cold, he notices. Your teeth chatter together in between your words, and the wavering in your voice seems to be getting worse.

“Where are you? Why aren’t you inside?” He grabs his keys and he’s out of the door before you even have the chance to respond. His legs are moving faster than his mind can, and he’s already halfway down the stairs before he knows it.

You tell him where you are, but pointedly avoid his second question, and he supposes that’s fair. Maybe you just don’t want to share.

“I’m coming. Don’t move.”

Even despite the fact he’s glad you called him, Wriothesley wonders why you didn’t call an Uber. You’ve always been very vocal about how much you hate his motorcycle, and how you wish he’d just get a car. is the situation so dire that you don't care anymore?

When he gets to you, you’re sat outside of an upscale restaurant. He’s sure you left with a jacket, but you don’t have it on now.

“Hey,” he says, sitting next to you. “What’s the matter?”

You burst into tears when he asks you that question, and for a second, Wriothesley has no clue what to do. It’s you who buries your face into his chest, sobbing desperately.

“It was going okay at first, but the waitress got the guy’s order wrong and he went crazy. So they asked him to pay and leave, and then he said he didn’t want to because his order was wrong. He demanded that a manager come and then he said that I should pay. And I said I’d pay for my half, but as I was saying that I wasn’t going to pay for him, the manager came and picked up the wrong end of the stick, and she wouldn’t listen to the waitress who was defending me. So she asked us both to leave, and he’s screaming his head off, and they barely even gave me time to grab my phone before they marched us out. They would have left me with him while he was blowing his top if it wasn’t for the waitress who came with me until he left.” you cling onto his jacket. “I’m so embarrassed.”

“Don’t be embarrassed.” He says lowly. “It’s not your fault. It was never your fault.” He shrugs his jacket off and puts it over your shoulders. “Show me your table. I’ll get your stuff.”

“Wriothesley, please.” You can feel the anger radiating off him, and you worry about what will happen if he ends up on the wrong side of that manager.

“You shouldn’t suffer because of a guy with no manners. Let me get your things.”

You nod but insist on staying outside. The waitress that you said helped you earlier is the one that greets Wriothesley at the door, and you watch on as she brings him your things, and he settles the bill.

“You didn’t have to do that,” You tell Wriothesley as he returns.

“I did. Shall we go?” He asks, handing you a helmet. He’d bought that helmet for you when you first moved in together, just in case you ever needed to use his motorbike, but you always refused. He’s glad that it’s finally getting used at least once.

The ride home is silent, and you don’t say anything until you get back into your apartment. The feeling of the wind against your skin and your arms around Wriothesley calms you, and even though you feel humiliated by the actions of your stupid blind date, you feel that maybe things aren’t all that bad.

“You finally stopped calling me bunny,” you say, as you flop onto the sofa. Wriothesley hums in response as he fills up the kettle. In his haste, he’d left all of the lights in the apartment on.

“Does it bother you?”

“A little.”

“You’re so contrary.” He says finally. “You say you hate me calling you bunny, but here you are. You say you hate my motorbike, but you’re okay with me using it to pick you up.”

“I don’t hate your motorcycle.” You say, sitting up to look at him properly. “I think it’s cool.”

“Right, that’s why you refused to ever be near it.”

“I just hated the thought of you getting hurt on it.” You say finally. “It scared me.” He hands you a cup of tea and sits next to you. He hadn’t expected that to be your reasoning. “A part of me hoped that you wouldn’t let me go on that date, you know.”

“Why? It’s not my place to tell you what not to do. If you want to go on a blind date, I can’t stop you.” Those are the words he’d told himself as he watched you leave—you were your own person and it wasn’t his place to try and police what you do.

“You don’t understand.”

“Maybe I don’t,” he replies. “Help me understand.”

You take a deep breath. “If I kissed you, would that help you get it?”

“I don’t know. I suppose you’ll have to try.” He smiles. He barely even gets to finish his sentence when you pull him down to you and kiss him. In all the time he imagined he’d get to kiss you, he didn't think you’d be the one to initiate–-but even still, he wraps his arms around you and pulls you closer.

“Do you get it now?” you ask giddily.

“Not quite.”

So you kiss him again and again until he gets the message.

Bonus:

“You’re not the sharpest pencil in the box, really, are you?”

“Luckily for me, you’d make a great sharpener.”

© 2023, thesparklingwriter. please do not copy, edit, repost, or translate.

notes: um ig its time to add wrio to my taglist form lol.. i really cannot get a good grip on his character so if you read this without thinking "he would not do that" then I am relieved but if you did i am also not surprised lol

[wangxianficfinder]

In the mood for...

Dec 21st

~*~

1. Hello! Today, I'm in the mood for a fic that explores the kinky love life of wangxian. I prefer it to be 40k and above.

The whole fic doesn't have to revolve around it but I would like it to be an important part of the story. I prefer it to be canon universe but it can also be an AU.

We know that Wangxian are pretty kinky in canon so I would like to read a fic that tackles all of their kinks in a healthy way and I would also like them to talk about it and communicate.

Thank you! @broodyelii

u could check out some of their fics (ScarlettStorm)

~*~

2. Hello! I hope you're all having amazing days and I'm sorry for bothering again so soon, but I just need to ask. Does anyone knows any fic about transmigrator!LWJ? I just stumbled onto the concept and am obsessed. @lostandmessedup

🔒 Once In a Lifetime - CQL-IRL transmigration shenanigans. series by Anonymous (T, 41k, WangXian, RPF, Transmigrator LWJ, Attempt at Humor, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Crack, Crack treated half seriously, Friendship, Developing Friendships, Dimension Travel, after 14 chapters I want to clarify that LWJ is more of a dimensional traveler than a transmigrator, he didn't die. he's alive and well lol, Happy Ending, Transmigrator WWX, Attempt at Humor, Married WangXian, WangXian are married and they make it everyone's problem)

🔒 a kick-start to falling in love by wereworm (T, 7k, WangXian, Transmigrator LWJ, Modern, WWX licks blood, that's a content warning but also just a statement about WWX, LWJ is the transmigrating cultivator and WWX is the uni student caught in the rain, WangXian's intricate rituals tm, Meet-Cute)

💖 the roots by thelastdboy (E, 30k, WangXian, MM/WQ, MM/MM's Husband, Major Character Death, Graphic Depictions of Violence, Post-The Untamed, Canon - MDZS & The Untamed Combination, Transmigrator LWJ, Parallel Universes, Dimension Travel, Time Travel, Desperation, POV WWX, POV LWJ, Post-Canon, Heavy Angst, Mental Health Issues, Grief/Mourning, Abandonment, Depression, Suicidal Thoughts, Hurt/Comfort, Getting Together, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, WQ Lives, Found Family, Cottagecore, Rogue Cultivator WWX, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Bittersweet)

~*~

3. Hi, this would be for ITMF: I just finished I Carried This for Years by LadyOfVengeanceAndWar and omg, I'm obsessed? (too bad its still a WIP) I'm desperately in need of more yummeng siblings role reversal, or yummeng siblings personality swap. I guess even !ylz lwj is fine too if it's good. I prefer long fics (and preferably nothing explicit, but I'll take anything atp)! thank you!!

Keep Holding On by abCEE (M, 316k, JC & WWX & JYL, WangXian, Canon Divergence, OOC, Demonic Cultivator JYL, YLLZ JYL, Twin Prides of Yunmeng Dynamics, Yúnmèng Siblings Dynamics, Yunmeng-Jiang Sect, Fall of Lotus Pier, JC gets the support that he needs, WWX knows what self-preservation is, Role Reversal, LWJ will do anything for his WWX, Twin Jades of Lan Dynamics, Good Uncle LQR, Gusu-Lan Sect, WangXian are married and have a son, Ghost General WQ, Sunshot Campaign, Angst with a Happy Ending, Artistic License, Accidental Baby Acquisition, Established Relationship, PTSD, role reversal but not entirely YL centric)

🔒 Tarnished Jade by AlyxRae (T, 66k, WangXian, JYL/JZX, WIP, Canon Divergence, Role Reversal, LWJ is the Yilling Patriarch, WWX is Hanguang Jun, Not Everyone Dies, Temporary Character Death, Normal Yilling Patriarch story arc, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Blood and Violence, Slow Burn, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Canon-Typical Violence, Graphic Description of Corpses, Demonic Cultivator LWJ, LWJ Whump, POV Alternating, Sunshot Campaign, Mutual Pining, Soft LXC, Dysfunctional Jiang Family, Good Sibling JYL, Smitten WWX, but he doesn't actually realize it, Cultivation Sect Politics, smooching, JC is Bad at Communicating)

Some Flowers Bloom Only At Night series by punisherbeauty (T, 98k, JC & WWX & JYL, JC & JL, JC & LWJ, WangXian, JYL/JZX, JYL & JL, JYL & LSZ, LJY & LSZ & JL, Female WWX, Male LWJ, JC Needs a Hug, YLLZ JC, Ghost General WN, Protective WQ, Role Reversal, LWJ & WWX Are LSZ's Parents, JYL Lives, BAMF JYL, JZX Lives, BAMF WWX, Sect Leader JYL, Fluff, Angst, Yunmeng Siblings Feels, Slow Burn, Self-Indulgent, Hurt/Comfort, Protective JC, Demonic Cultivation, Demonic Cultivator JC, Blood and Violence, Blood and Gore, Torture, Aftermath of Torture, Good Sibling JC, Soft JC, Drama & Romance, Family Drama, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Depression, Physical Abuse, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Blood and Injury, MXY Deserves Better, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Angst and Feels)

~*~

4. ITMF... Are there any fics (wangxian preferably but I'll take all recs) where the cultivation world wanted LWJ's death after the burial mounds, but LXC and/or LQR begged them to reduce it to the punishment he got instead? Bonus points if LWJ doesn't know about it. @thegertie

~*~

5. Hii this us for itmf would be forever grateful if someone could recommend fics like this snarky but supportive lan qiren about wangxians marriage hehe @bunnycoffeeumcat

in-laws hate it! get a grandbaby with this one weird trick by lazulisong (G, 1k, WangXian, Accidental Baby Acquisition, although more like, its free grandbaby)

as it should be by Sienne (T, <1k, LQR & WWX, pre-WangXian, Time Travel, Drabble, Crack, Fanart)

~*~

6. hi!! for the itmf, can i have your favorite watching the series fics? preferably with no crossovers with other mxtx books

💖 The Path by Seastar98 (Not Rated, 279k, WangXian, JC/WQ, JYL/JZX, Watching the Series, Fix-It of Sorts, Canon Divergence, Golden Core Reveal, CQL Verse, Angst with a Happy Ending, BAMF NHS, it's what he deserves, check chapters for specific warnings)

Teen Project to Change the World by animeloverhomura (Not Rated, WIP, 841k, WangXian, JYL/JZX, Watching the Show, With a bit of the Manhua and Book thrown in, BAMF WWX, Fix-It, JGS is his own warning, Attractive WWX, Homophobia, disturbing imagery)

The Characters of MDZS Watching the Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation by emma_screams (M, 166k, WIP, WangXian, Humor, Fluff, Angst, Drama, Characters Watching Their Series)

unhappy stories with happy endings by Last_for_Hell (M, 30k, WangXian, Memories, Memory Fic, Kinda, Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks, sexual content maybe, References to Torture, PTSD, Characters Watching Their Series, kinda, but not entirely, very light consensual non-consent)

Mo Dao Zu Shi: The Musical by Loveable_Psychopath (Not Rated, 117k, WIP, WangXian, Time Travel, Fix-it, Song Fic, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Underage Drinking, Underage Smoking)

Your Tragedy, Your Song by Grace_ShadowWolf (TaubeLePigeon) (T, 42k, LQR/WRH, JGY & NHS, WangXian, Angst with a Happy Ending, Characters Watching Their Series, basically they watch their future, But through songs, exposed secrets, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Songfic, Drama, POV Multiple, the author makes use of animals to represent characters, JGS is a shit, WRH is highkey so done with WC, let LWJ take care of WWX, mild body horror, the author accidentally makes wenqi and wangxian battle for the spotlight)

~*~

7. Hellour! So, for the next itmf, i have been seeing that trend "we listen and we dont judge" everyhwere and thought how wangxian would do in it. So basically a fic where they are forced to say their fantasiesfor eachother or share them with eachother (could totally be all crack or all angst i love both)also, any era works just no wip or abo fics please @just-troy0-0

I think these work for 7, although the truth sharing happens as a result of curses or spells in all of them:

🧡 Brilliant Mistake by brooklinegirl (E, 53k, WangXian, Modern AU, Sex Pollen, Mpreg, dubcon, Modern Cultivators, Dubious Medical Science, 🔒[Podfic] Brilliant Mistake and Brilliant Love (the sequel) by raitala)

beneath six layers of silk by darkredloveknot (enheduane) (E, 12k, WangXian, Post-Canon, Canon Compliant, Getting Together, Confessions, Curses, Embarrassment, Vulnerability, Swearing, Dirty Talk, Hand Jobs, Angst, Fluff, Smut, Honesty, Communication, beneath six layers of silk by darkredloveknot [podfic] by Rhea314 (Rhea))

Rarely Pure and Never Simple by thunderwear (Not Rated, 3k, WangXian, Post-Canon, Truth Spells, Curses, First Kiss, Love Confessions, Post CQL, Getting Together)

Words Spilling From Your Lips by Hellosweetie99 (M, 4k, WangXian, truth curse, Established Relationship, Canon Compliant, Fluff, Eventual Smut, Fluff and Smut, Top LWJ/Bottom WWX, Post-Canon, Blow Jobs, Dom/sub Undertones)

~*~

8. ITMF a fic where lz is a DILF 🙏

ink and honey by mirrorofprinces (T, 1k, WangXian, Modern, Meet-Cute (kind of), Finding Love at the Farmer's Market, Rattoos, Single Dad LWJ, Support your Local Beekeepers)

Phishing by Lovewave_Aesthetic (E, 11k, WangXian, Modern, Smut, Dom/sub, Face Slapping, Size Kink, Size Difference, Dominant LWJ, Submissive WWX, Enthusiastic Consent, Age Difference, Daddy Kink, WWX being bratty and verbal, LWJ being a quiet but kinky dilf, WangXian Have a Breeding Kink, Hair-pulling, Loss of Virginity, Light Bondage, Trans Male Character, Trans WWX, Hackers, Wangxian with vaporwave aesthetics, Non-Linear Narrative)

A Matter of the Heart by Nomme_dePlume (M, 54k, WangXian, Modern with Magic, Canon-Typical Violence, Light Angst, Slow Burn, Age Difference, Strangers to Lovers, Attempt at Humor, BromCom to RomCom, Masturbation, Dry Humping, Getting Together, Love Confessions, Mild Language, Falling In Love, Time Skips, The falling in love happens during the time skips don't @ me, Road trip with your childhood hero who is now a DILF, WWXs hate-hate relationship with doing things for his own happiness, Story is an excuse for the author to write a cheesy airport confession scene)

~*~

9. Hey! First off thanks for all the work you do. Secondly, I have been itmf a fem!LWJ/fem!WWX fic with actual plot(I’m okay with E rated) without either WWX or LWJ having past relationships with other people( or if they did it’s irrelevant). Thanks in advance and have a good day/ night wherever you are!! @neverforgetyou-1

so little time and i'm way off track by defractum (nyargles) (E, 25k, wangxian, modern w/ cultivation, case fic, amnesia, dub con, fuck or die)

cold hands, warm heart by martyrsdaughter (M, 8k, Female WangXian, Post-Canon, Gender or Sex Swap,BCase Fic, Ghosts, Time Loop, Banter, Fluff and Angst, Married Life, for wx liberating ghosts is part of the domestic bliss, Vaginal Fingering, Light Bondage, Dominant LWJ, Submissive WWX, LWJ and WWX Have a Non-Con/Rape Kink, Consensual Non-Consent, Explicit Depictions of Suicide, mild bloodplay)

🔒the dinosaur artist by varnes (T, 12k, Female WangXian, Bringing Up Baby AU)

Happy for Now by ScarlettStorm (E, 75k, Female WangXian, Modern AU, no magic, Rule 63, Cisswap, There Was Only One Bed, romance author au, Adhd wwx, service top LWJ, Pining, Smut, Comedy, Minor Angst, major shenanigans, horny yearning, furtive masturbation, Cunnilingus, Vaginal Fingering, Sex Toys)

~*~

10. Hi! for the next ITMF are there any sun/moon spirit aus? like Shine Brightly, That I May Glow by TheLegendOfChel

~*~

11. Hi!! My biggest thank you to the admins for running the absolute treasure of a blog and to everyone who helps with finding fics and recommendations!!

ITMF fics where:

A) Jiang Cheng understands how disfunctional and bad his parents are towards both Wei Ying and himself and actually does something about it to protect his brother/best friend and their relationship. Kudos if it is not only about Madam Yu being abusive but also about Jiang Fengmian being avoidant and careless towards all of them, and doing stupid shit like overlooking Jiang Cheng in favor to Wei Ying in a really stupid and oblivious way. I crave clever, protective and badass brother Jiang Cheng!

B) Madam Yu understands that she is a bad paarent figure towards Wei Ying and her children and does something to make it better. Maybe someone crudely opens her eyes on her actions and words' consequences, maybe she has a moment of clarity, or some accident shows her how her children and their sect brother are beware of her / protective / ready to do anything for each other and that Wei Ying is actually amazing and has horrifyingly low self-worth. She understands that she was wrong and needs to change to save her relationship with her kids and her charge. Kudos if the way to forgiveness is difficult and painful, but at least somehow successful in the end!!

Thank you ❤️ @shellennium

11A)

The Stranger Inside My Son by Mademoiselle_A (T, 79k, JC & JFM, JC & YZY, JC & WWX, JC & JL, JC & JYL, WangXian, JC & JGY, Time Travel Fix-It, But from an outsider's POV, JC is So Done, JFM's A+ parenting, YZY's A+ Parenting, Both are not great but this is not a bashing fic, JC-centric, But from JFM's POV lol, POV Outsider)

The Threads of Fate by WaitForTheSnitch (E, 108k, WangXian, WIP, Time Travel Fix-It, Canon Divergence, Not Everyone Dies, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, Cloud Recesses Shenanigans, Good Uncle LQR, Protective LWJ, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, Pining LWJ, WWX in WWX’s Body, JC & WWX Reconciliation, is it reconciliation if WWX doesn’t know they were estranged?, Oblivious WWX, WWX Deserves Better, WWX Deserves Happiness, Siblings JC & WWX, Supportive JYL, Protective NHS, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Comic Book Science)

11B)

❤️ And Time Is But a Paper Moon by sami (M, 138k, WangXian, XiChengQing, Time Travel, Fix-It, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Healing, Mental Health Issues, PTSD, Hurt/Comfort, Depression, BAMF WWX, BAMF JC, BAMF LWJ, BAMF JYL, Getting Together, And Time is But a Paper Moon [PODFIC] by sami, Winterstar1412, [Podfic] Cold read of And Time Is But A Paper Moon by kisahawklin, multiple translations available)

🔒❤️ the thing with feathers by RoseThorne  (G, 43k,wangxian, Transmigration, Time Travel Fix-It, Illnesses, Family, Scars, Memory Loss, Angst, Fear, Recovery, Sharing a Bed, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Good Parent YZY, Referenced Sexual Slavery, Blood and Gore, Sexual Tension, Arranged Marriage, Grief, Adoption, POV Third Person, POV Alternating, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Good Parent LQR, Clairvoyance, Butterfly Effect)

~*~

12. Hi lovelies! Long time lurker first time requester. I'm in the mood for a fic where wwx's or lwj's relatives try to keep them apart, with good or bad intentions, resulting in angst and misunderstandings. Recently I read a fic where LXC's well-meaning intervention (temporarily) broke up wangxian and now I crave that mineral. Could be modern AU or not, happy ending preferable, and ideally under 50k.

All The Years Lost by UseMyMuse (T, 26k, WangXian, Teen Pregnancy, Angst with a Happy Ending, Single Parent AU, Forced misunderstandings, Forced miscommunication, Mpreg)

The Winner Takes It All by YilingSani (M, 46k, WangXian, Modern AU, Single Parent WWX, Old Friends, One Night Stands, No Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, PTSD, Panic Attacks, Forgiveness, Second Chances, Inspired by Mamma Mia! (Movies) Teen Pregnancy, Mpreg, mention of miscarriage, Birth Trauma, amniotic fluid embolism) These are both mpreg. I know of others that fit the request but they're significantly longer than the requested under 50k.

hi! i was wondering if the asker of #12 in the latest fic finder could maybe tell us the fic where LXC’s well-meaning intervention broke Wangxian up? thanks !!

~*~

13. Hi I hope you can help me found a fic. A dark wangji who have no problem killing anyone who try to hurt weiying. It can be past or future. Just want a crazy over protective wangji to wei ying. @sadritsuka12

A Matter of Time series by mrcformoso (E, 84k, wangxian, time travel fix-it, graphic depictions of violence, underage, LWJ pov, JC pov, dark LWJ, manipulation, grooming, teen body adult mind for LWJ, happy ending for wangxian, problematic consensual underage sex, blood & violence, insane LWJ, manic LWJ)

🔒 Flawed and Free by Vrishchika (E, 18k, WangXian, WIP, Major Character Death, Dark LWJ, Dark LXC, Dark Gusu Lan Sect, anti JC, Character Death, Temporary Character Death Time Travel Fix-It, JC bashing, Angst, Hurt/Comfort)

Somewhere Sits an Empty Throne by Siamesa (E, 19k, WangXian, Major Character Death, TGCF Fusion, Gods & Goddesses, Ghosts, Romance, Vengeance, Canon-Typical Violence, Dark LWJ, Grief/Mourning, Explicit Sexual Content, Angst with a Happy Ending)

🔒 Something is wrong with A-Zhan! by HeloSoph (M, 15k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Time Travel Fix-It, Sort Of, Dark LWJ, Morally Gray WWX, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, WWX Isn’t Adopted by the Jiangs, WWX is a Lan, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, JC Bashing, Smitten LWJ, Possessive LWJ, Engaged WangXian, Blood and Violence, a lot of people die, LQR Metaphorically Qi-Deviates, because of, Shameless LWJ, LQR Tries, to fit into the following tag, Good Uncle LQR, Semi-Public Sex, or at least wangxian’s version of it, Scheming NHS, POV NHS)

The Dark and Stormy Clouds series by lordmediator (E, 24k, WangXian, JC & WWX, Angst, Dark, Dark LWJ, Possessive LWJ, Violence, Blood and Violence, YLLZ WWX, Hurt WWX, Protectiveness, Protective LWJ, Jealous LWJ, Sad WWX, JC Needs a Hug, Good Sibling JYL, Protective JC, Good Sibling JC, Protective LXC, Dark LXC, Supportive LXC, Supportive JYL)

~*~

14. Hi! For itmf can I have fics where Xie Lian and Hua Cheng are WWX's parents? E.g. fics like Hua Xianle. Thanks so much!! ☺️ @no-blg

🔒 the hearth series by eccentrick (G/T, 65k, WangXian, HuaLian, Found Family, fluff with plot, Fluff and Angst, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Disabled Character, Ableism, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, WWX Isn’t Adopted by the Jiāngs, slow burn found family, Adopt WWX, Married HuaLian, Post-Canon TGCF, Kid Fic, TGCF Spoilers)

it takes a village by lariyats (T, 13k, HuaLian, HC & WWX, XL & WWX, Family Fluff, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Child WWX, hualian adopts wwx au, Snowball Fight, Shapeshifting, Festival, Ghost Peppers, Case Fic section, Growing Up, 4 part narrative structure, it’s seasonal)

Narrative of Strength by erosophic (T, 75k, HuaLian, WangXian, HC & WWX, XL & WWX, FX & MQ & XL, JC & WWX, FengQIng, WIP, Canon Divergence, HuaLian Adopt WWX, Found Family, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, XL takes WWX as a disciple, Protective XL, Protective HC, Adoption, Kidnapping, Attempted Kidnapping, QR being QR, Serious Injuries, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon-Typical Violence)

Just one person is enough by Sarah_R (T, 11k, HuaLian, HC & WWX, XL & WWX, WangXian, HX & WWX, SQX & WWX, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Hugs, Past Child Abuse, Cute, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Healing, MDZS canon divergent, LZ & WY will still fall on love!, And marry!, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon Divergence, Literally WWX getting adopted by all the gods and demons…, AND GETTING ALL THE LOVE HE DESERVES!, His still a self sacrificing idiot though…, HC best dad!, XL best mom!!!, WWX protection squad, Falling In Love)

🔒 there's a CHILD in my shrine?? WTF!! by corduroyserpent (G, 2k, HuaLian, HC & WWX, XL & WWX, Fluff, Crossover, HuaLian adopts WWX)

~*~

15. Thanks for running the ITMFs! Do you know of any fics where mxy!wwx plays wangxian on dafan mountain, lwj recognizes him, and jc strikes him with zidian, but breaking from canon the hit works and wwx is expelled from mxy’s body. Dealing with the aftermath of that- lwj almost got wwx back but now he’s gone again

None of them knew about the sacrifice ritual at this point, so for all jc/lwj knew it was a possession and zidian would work. So just something exploring that dynamic

~*~

16. In the mood for fic, where there is Lan Zhan possessed by some evil entity or yin iron or something. Fic where Lan Zhan is not himself and doesn't do anything evil willingly, but his possession his making him into different person. I wonder if there is such fic like that. No modern aus please.

old wounds, like hidden ghosts by wordsonpage (T, 2k, WangXian, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt, Post-Canon, Established Relationship, Dark LWJ, but like accidentally, Angst and Feels, Angst with a Happy Ending) it's a short fic but old wounds, like hidden ghosts definitely fits the request

Clouded by diamondbruise (M, 15k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Getting Together, Case Ficish, Curses, Dark LWJ, It’s a curse, Dubcon Kissing, Jealousy, Sharing a Bed, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dubious Consent, no sex in this fic just in general)

~*~

17. Heyo, me again. Are there any fics where Jiang cheng and His huaisang are married and canon still happens? Like all of canon? The reveal of meng Yao and everything? Please let me know, thank you😁 @yasssbassss

~*~

If you didn’t get an answer to your ask here, don’t forget to make use of @mdzs-kinkmeme and MDZS KINK MEME on Dreamwidth. Authors actually do use them for ideas. You may get what you order!***Your prompt doesn’t have to be kink! Fluff, crack, whatever - it’s all good!***

[unproduciblesmackdown]

among the boundless billions zaniness like laugh track as it definitely has that moment of expressing "rolling my eyes as The Left makes a kerfuffle of Acting like they have a stance as a veneer over the true belief that [xyz] is cool & chill actually" like what, approximate 0.000% chance wendy isn't, as usual, given the Objective Stance of "yeah yeah ohh we are cancelling involved parties talking about how we Don't watch this But. we all love this damn epic movie & already have it memorized so shut the fuck up, kids today" like. don't wanna really delve into how much billions thinks taylor or anyone is "really" trans / nonbinary like not too much benefit of the doubt in this material including what does provide info abt that specifically

& the general like [head in hands. what do you think any of this could possibly be about (you're the one that made your show at all about Power)] of "yes, it's bad/wrong to be someone that someone has done something to / victim of something" like that to be anti misogyny All Women Must Be Epic Winners b/c there's something to be proved: that they don't Deserve to be victims (of misogyny), not taken as a Given. while when we see some epic winner men stepping on other men (who need not all be guaranteed Winners so as to say misogyny is wrong), that's often Good, well beyond any assumption that various forms of basic disrespect / violation / patterns of emergent/entrenched power difference as Bad (for being things done to people, not for there being people they're being done to), & generally billions has to take an extra step when ppl get shitted on & tell us the Specific Cases when it was undeserved actually & someone was being mean to a specific person who didn't deserve that. & the specific cases when hey guess it wasn't that bad(tm) or when hey It's Okay that you're someone something was done to, in this case. & tell us what we were supposed to know all along like when someone who something was being done to (wrong Of Them, whether b/c they inherently deserve it no matter what, &/or b/c they failed to be someone who could make it Impossible to do anything to them, which, how do you do that besides being The Authority / Superior yourself, exactly? nonrhetorically? what if the in group vs out group / fascism / authoritarianism protected Me?) was actually being treated Too Well b/c ah well the abuse meant you were getting any attention, maybe it meant you were claimed as any superior's property, maybe it meant you weren't Already disposed of, as all Losers were in the end, You're Welcome.

obviously referring to winston where it's spelled out all the abuse towards him was deserved, & More than he deserved in the case of rian having more access & taking advantage of that, all for billions' enjoying its own sendoff there of, again, maximizing violation & violence short of [real violence is physical & leaves bruises / draws blood / Literally kills] which would be distasteful in general But doesn't it make wags look like the winner & winston the loser is that the former's completely unrelated completely impersonal ego blow gets way amplified taken out on winston, the most vulnerable recurring character when spyros as [first & ultimate Everyone Hates Him role] is more entrenched in there & billions still magnanimously pities tuk, as it does winston too, just not quite as much. again that like completely surface level realized power fantasy of forcing the mirror up to the Inferior so they're like nooo my inferiorityyyy & in doing so like, the projection in that lmao, we get it re: the valuing of & need(tm) for such Power Tripping & Reaffirming My Superiority & My Ego Restored; Everyone Claps like good god. & then for all ben & tuk are the slightly softer Two Too Nice Boys duo to the rian & winston quant duo, also like too nice i guess but not as much, ben is in charge of tuk but Any instance of rian being in charge of winston outstrips them in that "yay interpersonal abuse" dynamic, like then in the end billions may be like "yeah it's possible to be mean to them unlike how being mean to winston is actually Nice b/c he deserves everything he gets, we only vicariously enjoy it vs Feeling Bad for tuk & ben sometimes (still magnanimously & it's Not That Bad / just goofin)" like ben & tuk still Fail by not being people it's impossible to do anything to. & not Exceptions who anyone is really being Too Mean to. like if they were women, in which case, no problem surely with a "positive" kind of victim blaming where there is something Inherent that Will be victimized so hey how about to cancel that out there's this special Paternal Protection you Need always, Or Else? :) but instead they are men who are asian & is ben gay & w/tuk & winston nobody mentions glasses or fatness but billions doesn't really do much or very in depth textual mentioning of Anything, even w/nonzero mention that there may be gender & race in this world. a gay man, once. no disability. we just Know who are the inferiors who deserve it when they're treated inferiorly, or if they don't, they start deserving it when they fail to stop/avoid it, but if you start mentioning the factors behind who we all totally agree is inferior like whoa nobody was Saying any of that? being the real agent of oppression on the basis of the factors only You spelled out, much? nonbinary? i never say anything about the Gender Binary when i'm subscribing to it, sounds like You've created & enforced it. obfuscation & deflection onto [so Just Normal nobody has to label, explain, or argue it] couldn't serve a purpose & protect the existing power differences as they are. maybe You're the problem? perhaps you brought it upon yourself & now you're causing too much trouble standing up for yourself while everyone else's criticism is laser focused on you as the prior & continuing negative actions done to you are taken as a given / unquestioned / covertly protected to overtly encouraged?

anyway so wild if the Completely Normal(tm) Victim Blaming is uncritically recreated & oft embraced for "if you're watching this & don't wish you were axe / find him appealing" [billions as a sequence of vicarious power trips] purposes in this series....but a bit wild considering like this is your multiseason show that wasn't just purporting to be those power trips for [enough demographic & apparently specific personal tastes overlap w/creators] & was at all purporting to question the matters of power at play in the material, or yknow, at least to not be completely superficial material while said material is textually & thematically all about power difference being leveraged, how, the consequences, & so on. thus i will have to intermittently talk about it forever like this like lord unbelievable. & the funny little & sometimes less funny less little characters it has trapped in there so that those of us who were never meant to be in the audience can be cursed with this knowledge. like i have some feedback. "imagine not victim blaming" & "imagine adjusting your perspective can go beyond superficial layers added to politely defer to some other ppl while they're present but really like cmon do they deserve that. am i not just saying what we're allll thinking"

[amayanott]

Damian Wayne's Eyes + Lazarus Pit Genes Headcanon

Okay, so I was writing a chapter for my fanfic (the plot does not have much to do with the headcanon tho), and I was making a point on how all of Bruce's sons had black hair and blue eyes.

However, there's this issue in the fandom you all know about Damian's eyes being either blue like Bruce's or green like Talia's. You know the drill, ethnic representation and etc.

(Before we continue, I'm Arab myself, okay? So I DO know what I'm talking about).

So we all know Damian's eye color is inconsistent through DC Comics and Cartoons.

In the Wayne Family adventures he has brown eyes, in Son of Batman green eyes and in Outlaws he has blue eyes. Then he got green eyes in his own Robin (2021) series, but had blue eyes in Supersons.

My point is, I had trouble depicting his eyes, and then I decided to throw some imagination in it.

So, Ra's must have taken a few Lazarus Pit baths before he conceived Talia. And then his genes must have been affected by it. That's why Talia has both brown and green eyes, because when she experiences strong emotions (not necessarily anger) they turn green. Like, just the feeling of adrenaline could change the color of her eyes, for example.

And I mean, Talia's mom was Chinese after all. It was more probable that she got brown eyes or black ones rather than green. But we could say she's always on edge, mad, etc. and that's why they are green.

With Damian it's similar. His eyes when he first opened his eyes at birth were like Bruce's: dark blue. Sapphire. Then, as he grew up and Talia's genes (from Ra's) kicked in, he got green-eyed whenever angry. And the guy is almost always angry. So when he first arrived to the BatFam, his eyes almost always looked green, especially around Tim, for example. But Bruce and Dick are always sure they are blue despite that. So they do the math and voilà, his eyes' color fluctuates depending on his mood. And the longer he lives with Bruce and the others, the longer his eyes stay blue.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

Bonus: if Jason had kids, no matter the eye color they get (let's say blue), they will also get green-eyed when they get angry, although they wouldn't get the Pit's Madness TM.

Honestly, there's so much potential with anything related to the Lazarus Pit and its effects on genetics, it's a shame no one bothers to play with it a bit.

[court-jobi]

Look Up, Darlin'

Pairing: Bakugou x reader (biker! pro-hero reader, some afab pronouns used)

Words: 1.7k

Rating: G~

Warnings: Pro-Hero Bakugou domestic fluff, TW: eyedrops, if you're squeamish, established relationship, tooth-rotting fluff, "Bakugou knows best"TM

Summary:

Bakugou’s prized love placed a newly fallen-asleep leg down on the ground with an uncomfortable groan. He has half a mind to chew you out on your posture again; he’s told you time and time again that you’re gonna wreck your lower back that way… But you really haven’t learned how to manage your time well enough to finish your work at the office rather than bring it home every night- especially as you’ve been asking for more and more to cover expenses. It’s a bad habit, but one he still finds a soft spot towards… and Bakugou is not so high-and-mighty that he won’t step in and give you the helping hand you need.

A/N: Oops, I loved Midoriya's stress relief tactics so much in Reheat, I let Bakugou try his hand at some comfort! Enjoy, lovelies, and thank you for the love, as always!

For my My Hero Academia Masterlist, check it out here!

Read on Ao3

Back from an evening patrol route, Katsuki sighs at the hour listed on the microwave. Not much time left before you have to leave for yours. It’s his least-favorite patrol cycle, where you two are working opposite each other; but it only happens every two months -lasting only about five or six days each time. It’s enough to put him in a soured mood, but fortunately he’s been working on his attitude at your insistence. 

Best to enjoy what time he can, rather than be a grump about what he’s missing. Your routine has been disrupted too, after all.

However, the sight he comes home to flares up his disappointment even more: though this time, irritation sits in his chest because of you.

Finding you situated in the living room this way is becoming a bit of a habit; and not one that Katsuki loves. You’re stretching out your leg with a wince, which you’ve no doubt sat on for too long again. He really outta chew you out for this. 

–at least he would, until he got a better angle of your face: tightness and tension seep from every pore, sinking your eyes and draining your usually enduring spirit by the minute. 

Now of course, he was primarily concerned if you were having a charlie horse or circulation issues, because he reasoned that could affect your quirk. But moreover, you did not look comfortable. An 'I told you so' was also out of the question. It would hurt your feelings– not be a swift kick in the butt that would motivate someone like Izuku. 

So the questions remains, how to best help you… He's getting too damn soft around you.

This was a key difference between your work habits– not worthy of a fight, but a point of debate you usually opt to table for another time whenever he brings it up. Katsuki liked to get the back-end, post-mission paperwork done on-site at the agency, even if it took him longer after the fight to get home. Meanwhile, you liked to take your time, get ahead of the mad rush at the office after your adrenaline leveled out, and chose to work on it from the comfort of your couch. The latter would spare you the mental space after a battle, but opened up potential procrastination of the job entirely.

In both instances, he prided himself on his method and would defend it, even now. That said, he sure hated seeing you like this- when you fall on your method with a fumble.

Instead of a snark or a sigh, Katsuki comes up behind you with remarkable stealth for his character, interrupting your tired typing flow with his reflection cast faintly on your screen. He arrives just in time to get you back on track, reaching over the sofa and bringing your shoulders back with warmed hands.

"Those are some tired eyes, wifey."

Katsuki kissed the crown of your head firmly. You may not be his actual wife yet, but he can’t help trying out the name. Lucky for him, you haven’t had the heart to correct him yet, so he gathered it’s enough of a sign to keep it up. 

The day he finally makes it a reality will be a fully-realized dream come true. But for now, he’s set to save for the perfect ring, the perfect moment, and build up the skills needed to take care of you. Why not get a head start?

You exhale at his touch and freshly washed-up smell-- immediately regretting working for this long of a stretch, because the second your eyes shut, they stung.

"Got more left?"

"Mhm."

"Wouldja rather dictate?"

"You would be my secretary?" you couldn't believe the offer, despite his amused huff across your pinned up hair at the idea. He took it out, to run his hands through instead. 

Feels ungodly good, those hands– when they're not overworked and overheated, Katsuki keened when you told him so the first time he took to this method of relaxing you.

"If it would get your ass in bed sooner,” Katsuki snarks, “then yes. How long you been up.”

“Got up a few hours ago, to finish up~”

Katsuki chewed the inside of his lip with a scowl. So you didn’t get as much sleep as usual, it seems. Getting up early ahead of your 12-hour shift in order to finish your previous day’s work wasn’t best practice, and that’s exactly where he’s found you. 

This didn’t please him at all, but the blonde keeps his tongue from clicking its displeasure at you.

You sink into the movement of each fingertip, "It's more the eye strain getting to me than the lack of brain power, now."

"Well, you know what fixes those problems..."

Eye drops: which you hated, or coffee: which got you wired, not rested. Neither were a pleasant option at this hour, and made you groan.

With his long reach, Katsuki double swiped through what comment fields were left on your laptop, and simply made an executive decision to 'Save Progress' and shut the laptop down. You’d fallen prey to his massaging hand and whined once you registered what he did.

"None’a that,” he gripes at your moan, “C’mon. Off to bed."

"It's work, Katsuki. I need to do it."

"You NEED to set a timer. Barely ten minutes left’a work. Set it for after a nap." Katsuki rounded the couch and appeared before you as you tried for a spinal twist in his absence. 

"Thirty, if you're me,” you reply, “You rush. I’ve read your sum-ups…"

You say it with a smirk, but Katsuki is hardly in a joking mood.

"Says the woman working herself into an early grave. I think I'll stick with my ‘Sparknotes’, thank you very much," he crossed his arms.

Works for him, after all. You stared off at the offending computer in a way that Katsuki could only hope was you mentally running through the possibility that maybe there was something to his strategy that you could adopt in your favor.

Katsuki scoffed, then simply took your phone up without a fight from you, "Fine, I'll set it."

By the time he’s done, he centered back to you, but to a sad sight. You’re zoned out and defeated, exhausted. Summoning the grace you offer him in droves, Kats decides to soften the blow of his arrival home with a compliment, to ease your clear regret. No need to add lemon juice to your self-inflicted wounds.

"You take your time, and it does get ya results. It's good work. I'll give you that," Katsuki stuck your phone back on its charging pad, then squatted with his hands on his thighs, "--it aint worth all this."

No fight left in you on the matter, you thankfully agree, "... okay."

"Okay?"

"...I'll take the stupid eye drops."

“Good start...”

A hint lies unspoken in his tone. Just a pause, waiting on you to read into the rest like he knows you can…

“And-” you sigh and place a hand over his on his knee, “I’ll rethink this whole remote work thing.”

-Perfect-

"Atta girl," Katsuki chipped your chin up, and snuck a couple fingers to his back pocket. Taking a knee on the couch between your thighs, he stayed situated above you and into your space so you’d have no way to back out of what’s needed right now. "Four eyes, off."

You look shocked he has a bottle of eyedrops on demand. What do you take him for, a stupid extra? Of course he’s prepared. What do you think all these pockets are for, tictacs?

"-What, now?"

"Yes, now."

Shedding your blue light glasses, you tisk away your trepidation, "You were gonna make me use ‘em anyway."

"Cry me a river. Oh wait– you can't, cuz you don’t listen to your own frickin’ eyelids. Now c'mon, don't be difficult, dummy -look that way- dammit, do you ever blink..."

He kept your jaw up gently at first, knowing he’d likely have to borderline hold your entire throat in place when you blinked like mad and flail back after just one squeeze. 

You’d figured out a little trick by looking off into the corner of a room to help with the anticipation; Katsuki even used to make you count down to ‘zero’- only to execute the drops early, as a psych-out. You knew all the tactics now, so little worked to distract you, but whether he had to pull out all the stops or not, you still hated this process. 

Katsuki snarked through this little task with the bottle’s topper wedged between his teeth.The drops’ sting fortunately did lessen and give way to some cooling relief once he capped it again. Unsurprisingly, he sassed that you shouldn't wipe it all off, but he did take a surprisingly gentle touch at swiping away the excess from your lashline and cheeks for you. With more blinks, you were happy to give him a little apologetic smile.

"What do we say?" Katsuki purred with a smirk.

"Thank you."

"Thank you, what?"

"Thank you Lord Explosion Murder God, Dynamight, the Ultimate and Benevo-"

Stocked up with your praises, Katsuki kisses you: gentle in entry, but with a passionate tongue to shut you up.

"You're welcome,” he nudged noses with you, “-now come cuddle your murder god before you and I both pass out."

By his count, you’ve got two and a half hours before you need to scoot on out the door. He compromised on your cram time to an even twenty minutes to finish your report, fully confident you’ll be just fine with what you turn in. You’ll give him another sleepy kiss before he settles back into bed, you’ll take your dinner to-go, and he’ll take care of the rest of the chores around the apartment when he wakes up. May not love these wacky arrangements, Katsuki thinks, but the payoff will be more than worth it come Monday. 

He’s a hero; he can handle a few nights without you nestled in as his personal weighted blanket. For now, a quick cat-nap will do– for both of you.

[iglowindark]

@sideguitars and @makicarn you may regret engaging me about my 2025 Pasta Shape Rubric of Awesome (TM). 😜

i was getting quite annoyed with the New Year's Resolution questions from friends and fam - like, i consistently fail to overhaul my life during the other 11 months of the year, why would January be a magical success month? but i was also bumming everyone out during Resolution Reveals so i decided to pick something that would be fun for me and mildly upsetting for my elders!

the initial format was to "try every pasta shape in 2025". but. there are more than 400 pasta shapes. do you know how often i would have to eat pasta to accomplish this? i mean, i had to use a calculator because i forgot a year had 365 days, but it's MORE THAN ONCE PER DAY. i love pasta, but i also love other food, and i need to leave room in my life for every other cuisine.

so then i settled on "52 pasta shapes in 2025" - but glowy! (you might say) how will you decide which 52 pasta shapes to eat??? out of more than 400???

the answer is, of course: arbitrarily! but with a spreadsheet twist, because my first love in life is hot sauce, and my second love in life is a spreadsheet - no, i lied, i forgot about ms underfoot 😸, ok, she's #1, then hot sauce, then spreadsheets, then probably my family i guess.

ok, so please understand, i literally spent 7 hours and 40ish minutes over the past week assembling, editing, auditing, and admiring this spreadsheet. i started with trusty wikipedia, which helpfully broke down pasta shapes into groups like "long/medium" and "short cut" and "soup". it also had a group for "filled", but maki, sorry to say, this group i eliminated wholesale. there was just so much variation in what they might be filled WITH, and i needed some sort of control element. i didn't think it would be fair to compare cheese ravioli with 3-cheese tortellini? the cheeses are not equal! 🧀🧀🧀

so THEN: i did my own sub-grouping. (actually, first i split long and medium into their own groups, because, duh, they're different) long-flat and long-rolled, for example. i also started combining shapes that were really similar. like linguini and tagliatelle are kinda just the same noodle with slightly different widths/shapes/ingredients? (please, nonnas of the world, do not come for me in the comments, this was SO HARD). this part involved a lot of googling. my ad content for the next 4 months is gonna be all pasta related. through many gruelling rounds of re-googling to remind myself what shape was what, and some painful, tearful cuts (lasagne noodles are for lasagne, not for unserious noodle frippery) i finally finally finally culled my list down to 52 pasta shapes. 🍝 (editor's note: the single emoji does not represent this publication's favored pasta shape)

then the FUN part: how was i going to score these 52 pasta shapes? every google result went to pains to insist that different shapes were meant for specific sauces, and i'm sure that's true, but what's the fun in scoring something based on what it's meant to do? (also i didn't want to commit to having to make 52 different sauces/soups) so i came up with this scientifically rigorous scoring rubric:

BUTTERED/RED SAUCED (depending on my mood and whether or not i have red sauce available)

a pasta may earn up to one (1) point for being really good at holding butter/red sauce

a pasta cannot lose points in this category

PRIMAVERA (my version of primavera just means that i diced up whatever veggies i had handy and tossed them w/ the pasta)

a pasta may earn up to one (1) point if i can make one perfect bite that includes veggies/sauce/pasta

a pasta cannot lose points in this category

ALTERNATE USES

a pasta may earn one (1) point (max 5 points) for every non-food alternate use that i can dream up. for example, orecchiette could be used as hats for frogs! or to decorate the ramparts of a sand castle! 2 points for orecchiette!

a pasta may not lose points in this category

MISC/GENERAL (here's where i let my freak flag fly)

a pasta may earn one (1) point if i think the name is fun to say

a pasta may earn one (1) point if i think the shape is "cute"

a pasta may earn one (1) point if it works in a soup

a pasta may earn one (1) point if it might stick (cooked) on the ceiling

a pasta may earn one (1) point if it could probably be used to build a bridge for matchbox cars

a pasta may lose one (1) point if it sticks together unreasonably

a pasta may lose one (1) point if water gets stuck in it and surprises me with pasta water bites

a pasta may lose one (1) point if i can't eat it with a spoon

a pasta may lose one (1) point if it won't fit in a pot without being broken up

a pasta may lose one (1) point if it breaks when dropped from 5 feet (dried and uncooked)

all pasta shapes must be eaten twice (once with butter or red sauce, and once in a primavera), and once i've submitted my scores to myself, i cannot be influenced or bribed to change them. at the end of the year, a Champion Pasta Shape will be announced and celebrated.

so... was that a lot of senseless work for an absolutely pointless goal just so i can eat lots of pasta? heck yeah it was!!

[pfirsichspritzer]

The weather is rainy and cold, I have tea and biscuits. Everything ready for a reread of The Screaming Staircase ☕🍪📖😊

My accompanying ramblings under the cut:

I forgot that the book is set in autumn. Perfect mood for the cold snap we've had this week.

Lucy describing Lockwood's smile and the effect it has on her and the people around them makes me feral. Girl cannot mention his smile without comparing it to warmth, the sun, or her luminous watch!!!

Also, can we talk for a second how perfect Ruby and Cam played their parts regarding The Smile TM. Lockwood's blinding smile and Lucy softening despite herself?!?

Lockwood is such a larger than life character, it's easy to forget what an idiot he actually is. He is such a ridiculous teenage boy it's unreal...

I mean, he got locked in the loo?!?! How? What's is the story behind that? I need to know!!!

I love the image of Lockwood with his too big coat, constantly tripping or getting his rapier stuck in it, yet being too vain to actually don something sensible for a ghost hunt.

Just beautifully said. I remember noticing this description in my first read of the book.

Uhhh, the forshadowing. 👀👀👀 I wonder whether Stroud already had a concept for the origin of The Problem or whether that line was born from some personal issue with Kent