#also trying to figure out a drawing TO DO rn which is why im just grabbing from the archives rn

[reputable-opportunist]

Found this classic from September

[starreyblueberry]

Whenever people compare Hazel and Timmy its like why r we making two bad bitches fight, they could easily be best friends guys, like I fully think Hazel would help Timmy kinda think his actions though and help him actually process his emotions while Timmy would help Hazel to try not to overthink things and that everything will be ok in the end. Cosmo and Wanda love BOTH of them guys, yes there's a difference in status (IE. Hazel doesn't need Cosmo and Wanda as her parental figures, being more like aunt/uncle vs Timmy who kinda does, and has more of an adopted kid vibe with them) but that doesn't make Timmy or Hazel bad characters!! Nor does it make Timmy or Hazel a worse godkid, I legit just think they both show different styles of godparenting respectfully, and I think that's perfect? It was obvious that Cosmo and Wanda were doing something different with Timmy, Him being proclaimed the favorite, as well as the amount of time they spent with him in general. Timmy was a lot more neglected then Hazel, and I think Cosmo and Wanda had more of a parental attachment to him.

Hazel though has different problems, she has more severe anxiety and is in a new place that she's having trouble adjusting too! and unlike timmy, she experienced a loss of a caretaker when she was a kid, which is a different type of pain than having no caretaker. Comso and Wanda don't try to be Hazel's parents though, rather just another adult figure in her life that she can go too!! Yes I think that Hazel is a lot more fortunate than Timmy and I won't lie one of my criticisms for the new show is the fact that she too happy, which contradicts a lot of the OG's shows' logic that Godkids have to be miserable, but I think this was done for a writing shift, so that so much humor wasn't focused on the cynical tried to be funny outlook they had with Timmy, but actually focused on the fun a godparent CAN be! Hazel is still an amazing protagonist and cause of her we get more fun adventures with Cosmo and Wanda, and adventures in her world too!

I also think that Timmy in general is a more compelling main character but that's cause of my own preferences and beliefs. Im sure there are so many kids rn who watch A New Wish and see themselves in Hazel, like how so many of us saw ourselves in Timmy! I think there's a lot of misinformation and mischaracterization between both of them, and it sucks ALOT!! Im not super into a new wish as I am compared to the old show, but I can respect both protagonists without trying to make the other one seem any less. Saying that Timmy is worse then Hazel just feels like were writing off his characters to the bare bones that were kinda fucked up by butch Hartman himself. If you actually watched and took time to see his character, you'd see how he always just wanted to be a part of his family in the end, that a lot of his wishes were suppose to be somewhat selfless, and meant for the people he loved to be happy!! The "selfish" wishes he made were made out of emotional distress, which, what 10-year-old isn't experiencing at all times??? He had severe circumstances that its hard to draw the line as to what was just cartoon exaggeration vs what his reality is, cause as the show went on his parent's disdain for him felt very real.

He still stood up though, and he put his fairies safety above all else at times, and its so sweet, and shows how much Timmy really was part of their family. He is very much an average kid who no one understands and its sooo funny that it ended up being like that in the general public as well. Timmy did the best with what he had and tbh it was amazing!! I really loved the found family of it all and I do think he belongs with Cosmo and Wanda <3 BUT I THINK IN TERMS OF SHOWS, THEIR BOTH GOOD PROTAGS!! they just have diff storytelling/different circumstances and both are experiencing a different style of godparenting

im saying this as one of the top 10 Timmy Turner fans ever btw

[stillaclownlol]

Hiding in the bathroom from a man rn lmao

Aidlyn headcanons because...please? Please? They make me sick /positive

These aren't all fluffy or whatever because they traumatized af and relationships like that are...difficult... but not impossible.

-he's 8-ish months older than her and like, 20ish cms taller (sorry I don't know how American feet work lol 😭)

-He hyperfixated on the relationship lmao.

-Clingy...they BOTH are. In different ways I mean but. They are both clingy. They're scared the other is gonna die when they aren't around lol 🙃 Aiden is ofc very touchy and grabby, he just has to FEEL that she's with him. Also type of guy to call at 2am "hey bby u good?". Ash gets antsy if she hasn't seen or heard from him in a while (a while means like 2 hours) especially since he like spam texts her every 5 seconds. But he also hyperfixates or disassociates for a while and will forget 🤡 like she will yell at him about why he didn't call her for 17 hours and he'll just be like "um sorry. I was. Staring at a wall."

-he has a lot of weird/cringy ass pet names for her that makes her want to slap him; probably calls her Bae or whatever. Ash nicknames for Aiden: Idiot, stupid, dumbass, public safety hazard...called him "dear" like once just to try it and hated it. "Mr. Durable" if she wants to annoy him.

-worlds worst pick up lines. Ash NEVER understands them.

-he loves surprises! Surprise him! He wants to surprise Ash too! She kinda hates this. They decided to "compromise": he will tell her beforehand that there is a "surprise" and gives her little clues/puzzles so she can figure out whatever it is. He has like 0 patience tho so he always helps her figure them out 🤡 Ash likes watching him get excited about the puzzles and doing them together more than the surprise half of the time.

-Him infodumping is like white noise so she can sleep lol.

-they try to do things the other likes since Ash thinks this is important for a "healthy relationship". Almost died when they went to an indoor rock climbing place 💀 but she got to see Aiden in a leotard when they did ballet together so it was a fair trade (blackmail)

-he is her hypeman at ballet recitals, will probably cheer when she comes on stage and has a sign and everything, the rest of the gang (and Ash) is just like "...we don't know this guy"

-she wishes he took care of himself more. Sends him stuff like "did you drink any water today", "Ben told me you're gonna skateboard down the hill please dont", or "IF YOU SET YOUR BOOKS ON FIRE IM GONNA CALL THE POLICE" <3

-sometimes if she's sad she just kinda. Falls on his back. Like a koala or smth. She has that "I literally cannot do anything" sort of depression (which to be fair Aiden also has sometimes). Aiden carries her around.

-when nobody's looking she kisses his cheek, cuz she knows his face is usually sore from smiling so much.

-pretty low key on her part, but Aiden is so obvious everybody knows 💀 She doesn't like PDA (more so the fact that people stare) but Aiden will usually put his arm around her shoulders or waist/give her a smooch (not on the mouth) <3 it's honestly not that different from how he was when they were just friends ngl 🤡

-he says "I love you" easily, because it genuinely is the easiest thing in the world for him. He has 0 doubts about how he feels for her. Ash doesn't say it a lot cuz she feels weird saying it, so she does her best to show it in other ways.

-he gets jealous easily *siiiiigh* It's cuz he's insecure!!! Help him! 😭 He doesn't get annoyed with her because like. Ash pays about as much attention to other guys (I mean besides Tyler, Ben and Logan) as she does to dust. But he will death glare at any guy they don't know that's staring at her 💀

-kinda codependent... *looks at the floor* they are working on it. Sometimes Aiden feels like he's only alive for her. (I- Look at episode 61- IVE BEEN IN HIS POSITION. AIDEN BABY THIS AINT HEALTHY)

-absolute dork. Draws "A.C. + A.B." in a little heart in his note margins because he's goofy like that.

-he fell first she fell harder NO I will not be taking any criticism for this.

Anyways it's raining outside so I'll just post this now

[amethystfairy1]

Hi Amethyst! It's been a hot minute since I sent an ask in, but I have been reading both fics every day (still obsessed lmao) (also I name changed btw, used to be ElenaLoo)

Anyways, I had written a whole ask waxing eloquent on all the wonderful things going on in ttsbc, but I accidentally shut off my computer partway through and frankly I can't be bothered to write it all out again lmao. Just. It's beautiful (wow isnt that so meaningful and deep? im sure you're feeling very complimented rn)

The REAL thing I wanted to talk about was Traveling thieves (which is by far my favorite fanfic of ALL TIME), and all the amazingness in ttsbc made me forget it even existed for the past few weeks. But the other day I was just like "oh yeah. Traveling thieves." and then i reread the whole thing. whoopsies.

Ummm anywyas there's so many thoughts in my head about all the little guys, but recently I've been on an Imp and Skizz obsession (just scroll on my page for .2 seconds and you'll see) and YOU. You left them on a CLIFFHANGER. >:((( (not actually mad btw). I just. so excited for them. They're out alone in the woods right now and Skizz is going to have the perfect opportunity to kill Impulse and get away and I just am falling apart thinking about them. (I drew them to cope lol, posted on my blog but also later here so that I can talk about it more). I can see this playing out a few ways. Obviously Skizz isn't actually going to kill Impulse, so he's either going to 1) make up some excuse as to why he can't do it right then, but still plans to do it eventually, or 2) he does it. but he doesn't. Skizz attacks Impulse when he's not expecting it, there's a scuffle, and Skizz comes out on top---BUT THEN HE CAN"T FINISH IT!!! and it's a whole thing where even tho skizz tried to kill him, imp is still so understanding and skizz cries and impulse just freaking gives him a hug and

sigh

Whatever you do will be beautiful, I'm sure. I think you mentioned you're switching to tt after this fic, so crossing my fingers it's imp and skizz. (Though, would also be very happy with Martyn and Ren :P) (or anything really i just love tt)

Anyways, I had the art on my blog but I'm also putting it here so i can say things about it to you

Mostly I'm just very proud of their expressions, with Impulse being all concerned glancing over at Skizz, meanwhile Skizz is completely deadpan staring forwards, also looking very tired bc he needs a break from this universe. Also I switched up my Impulse design a lil bit from last time (if u even remember that lol it was months ago now). you would think, just looking at them, that Impulse took way longer to design, but nope, I was messing around with Skizz for at least double the time, trying to figure out how to have him facing forward whilst still showing some of the scars on his back. I gave up eventually xD (all that means is that im gonna have to draw him again later, from different angles)

actually that made me remember a question I had: are you planning to ship Imp and Skizz? Ik you said Zed and Tango are going to be a thing far in the future, but... skizzpulse? plzzzz plz pretty please haha im not obsessed

aaaaaand that reminds me of another question, is skizz going to be in ttsbc? (pretty please also same question as tt, if he was in ttsbc, are him and impulse together? Im addicted to them all i care about these days is some good imp and skizz shipfics, and you're such a fantastic writer, both with plot and the vibes of the words themselves. u could write such good imp and skizz. just imagine the possibilites! (am i selling it?))

aaaaaanyways. im gonna go reread the old tt skizz fics because theyre delicious and painful, like eating knives. u have a good day :))

HIIIIIII

I ADORE THIS ART SO MUCH! I gave you all my rambles on the reblog but it's SOOOOO COOL!

I'm sad the waxing eloquent about TTSBC is gone 😭 but that's ok!

I'm so glad you're enjoying TT and all the drama going on in there! Imp and Skizz are definitely having a time and a half with all of this nonsense going on...I love all your theories! I won't confirm or deny anything of course, but I'm so happy you're excited for them!

I will not be shipping Imp and Skizz, sorry! I just personally don't ship them, so they're gonna remain platonic...I mean, in TT who knows what the hell they're doing to be fair 😆 but yeah, Zedango is going to be a thing in the distant future, but no Skizzpulse! Sorry!

Skizz is not in TTSBC at the moment, that doesn't mean he never will be! Just haven't found a spot for him yet...and no, he also would not be with Impulse, I'm so sorry I just don't ship them personally! I think it's a very cute ship tho!

Enjoy rereading the TT Skizz fics!!! Thank you again for the gorgeous art!!!! I love it!!! 💖

[mariusroyale]

tips on how to draw raph? :3

I’m a raph lover but he is so hard to draw 😔

hey an!! listen i get u completely, this big spikey boy can be a real challenge

my main advice would probably be to recognise raph’s structure? his shapes and how he’s formed, etc. and the best way for that imo are references! i have a tag for this actually

and here’s some raph refs!

if u wanna know how to draw the entirety of the best boy this post wouldn’t do it justice so here’s some main things:

if you’re trying to replicate the show’s style keep in mind how angular everything is. raph's main shape is a square because of how bulky and rigid he is (helps to encourage his character's role too! love that they made him such a fucken tank)

raph’s head shape is basically if you widened leo’s head- they’re both pointed too

one main thing i do for any head really is keep in mind the eye placement and the cheeks

if u happen to draw faces with the fabled circle and two lines- i use the horizontal line to mark where the bottom of the eyes are- and where the start of the cheek begins (i’m doing my best not to make this into a ‘now draw the rest of the owl’ moment)

if that makes any sense. heres a really shoddy 'tutorial'

i kinda just blank out on my canvas and raph appears out of sheer will

but also just like.

figure out how you like raph's head to look (maybe u want his snout longer, or his jaw shorter, etc etc)

figure out where his brow ridges are located and how they're moving (is he grumpy? is he angry??)

make a mask for his eyes to go in (jebus take the wheel)

pronounce snout (it protrudes, which makes it easy to figure out his facial planes)

do whatever feels right for his mouth- im not exactly rigid with how i draw as of rn, i just do what feels right

ive drawn raph with a more pronounced snout too, and oscillate between designs if i feel like it (truthfully i also sometimes begin his head shape with a square (i mean if im doing a different style), feel free to do that if it helps i dunno-)

if you want to draw his shell and plastron here’s what i do:

being able to carve out 3D shapes will help a lot with the border of his shell

by blocking out the main shape and then carving away at it you can then see how raph’s shell is structured (just. try decipher my sketch if u can pfghjhj)

for the actual shell itself it’s a lot like mikey and leo’s where it has a big curve and then dips at his midsection (where his belt goes!) also keep in mind the spikes of his shell follow those same curves (ft. dr belle)

with his plastron (chest plate) i basically make sure it’s the same length of his clavicle? the jagged edges of it i mean. it helps a lot to map out where his shoulders meet his arms

(pls keep in mind my art’s inconsistent and i don’t even follow my advice- the hole in his shell changes every time i draw it 💀)

his body shape is also just in general wider and stockier- if i ever see people draw him skinnier than he is you'd be able to hear my soul exiting my body

all of him is wider in general! hes bigger than the rest of his brothers so dont forget to show it instead of just giving him a height difference. he BEEG.

i’m not sure how else to describe the process of drawing him other than just. draw him?? 😅 my best advice would be to draw him repeatedly based on references- and study your favourite raph artists’ way of drawing him (mine would be jacocoon and itz_jazzy_jazzin)

and it helps to study bc it can answer these questions

how do you want to draw him? do you like the way a specific artist stylises his features? do you want him more spikey? more sharp? maybe you want to draw him bigger! (i myself like to give him a tail, extra markings on his spikes + a few scars post movie and his mismatched eyes)

repetition is super important to get it all engrained in your brain- and it’s why i don’t really even use refs for him anymore fldjs

dont forget a very important rule: appreciate the big boy in all his glory

[shyshyaaaaaa]

Cooking stuff up rn, take my little drafts for their heads :3 (jekyll and hyde for my au yipee!)

I have come up with so many different reasons as to why Hyde doesn’t wear the glasses. One of my most recent ideas is that the glasses simply just don’t fit on his bigger nose. Haha.

Anyway this is me dipping my feet more into the “look basically the same” idea. The idea is basically js to make Hyde look like a younger Jekyll to the point you could guess he was his son, which is the kind of assumption Utterson would probably make 😭 I want them to be so similar that when Utterson sees Hyde’s face for the first time like in the book he’d have anime flashbacks to when he and Jekyll were younger. because thats js funny to me.

but yeah. they have to be different enough for it to be reasonable that you wouldnt question it at first glance, but similar enough that you could believe there’d be some skeptics. a very hard balance but im managing for now 😭

also js fyi im kinda js drawing this to get down their hair and colours and not including the more detailed body horror stuff i have planned. like realistically hydes eyelids shouldnt be able to come down according to the rules i made for the transformation in the au but like im js trying to figure stuff out. when i do draw the actual body horror stuff, itll be disgusting and detailed, dont worry :3

[clovenhoofedjester]

jellicle lineups; part 1/4

hi catsblur ! today i am presenting to you the fruits of my labor. my own little versions of the jellicle cats; obviously based on the replica designs With Fun Little Twists ! such as, they are not naked. ramble below the cut, both on designs and some personal thoughts on the characters

these designs are very much first-draft, subject to change, blah blah. you will very likely be seeing me drawing them differently if i post more of them. i just. urrbhhh. i had 2 draw them....

and the clothes ! even though they're very feline i draw them a bit too human-y for the nakedness to not look consistently weird. i will be drawing them closer to the stage designs in some instances but for rn. clothes. it was a fun exercise in character design too

the kittens are all young adults, think 18-20 ! as much as i love headcanons like demeter being sillabubs mother, it shrimply will not work out timeline-wise. so headcanons like that will be delegated to like... siblings and stuff

victoria | 🍧 💌 🩰

i started out with victoria's design not only because of her being the Main Kitten, but because she has such a concise and clear aesthetic to me. she actually started out with a simple pastel brown dance practice fit before i decided that i wanted to make the outfits ornate(ish) and ended up with a proper ballerina getup

i also quite like when victoria is not just solid white with some grey (love ones that are more yellow or brown) so i colored her fur with some blue and pink-ish tones not only to add more depth but to resemble the trans flag LOL

and i wanted to try something different with making her a bit more lavender than baby pink. i also based her overall look on obc victoria, portrayed by cynthia onrubia :^]

to move on to character interpretation, i think victoria is partially deaf and mute. she primarily communicates through dance. as one of the oldest kittens she'd be 19 in human years

plato | 💐 🕯 🍬

plato's design doesnt stray too far from his standard replica design but i tried to add my own flair . i tried to keep the creepy porcelain doll aesthetic going w their face added some more depth like some other designs with different colors and bold face stripes

i also really like the outfit i chose for them. the flower in their hair and on their shirt is a peony which is a popular wedding flower :") because im a sucker for platoria and very much subscribe to the idea that the ball we see is their funny cat wedding in a way

the outfit is based on standard ballerino costumes but i tried to stray from it with the silky half-skirt thing and pointe shoes. lets go queer cats lets go

i think plato is also very quiet and that's why he and victoria were so drawn to each other. i also quite like the idea that he was a bit of a troubled stray before he found the jellicles. they would be 20 in human years

electra |⚡🥭 🔔

boy i STRUGGLED with electra's clothes i struggled so hard. i think i'm happy with what i ended up with though—i originally gave her the babydoll dress that sillabub has (inspired by artsed electra) but figured that i wanted at least one of the girls to be more tomboyish/butchy. thank you to that one production which apparently had electra be one of the raffish crew and get in on some of the boys' choreography

im very happy with what i did with her fur colors as well. silly little tortoiseshell :] its based on a nonrep but i have no idea which one. enjoy her freckles too

i think electra deserves to be a little spunky. [whispers] i also think shes bombalurinas little sister. she'd be 18 in human years

etcetera | 🎠 🍯 🏅

i needed at least one cat with a circus aesthetic. say hello to my magnum opus: jacked tumbler acrobat etcetera. it was only a matter of time until someone said fuck it and let one of the girls perform lifts and stuff. this is mostly because ive always really liked how shes usually the cat to do the flying trapeze bit and wanted to push it further

i also struggled SO EXTREMELY HARD with making her colors look nice and makeup distinctive but i figured it out in the end—thank you obc cettie for the mismatched eyeshadow and such. i also wanted to give a cat a short bob type of head fur/hairstyle and she fit the bill

nothing much about specific character notes other than like... i want to make her related to some of the cats but cannot for the life of me figure out who 2 assign. also she'd be around 19 in human years, a couple months younger than vic

sillabub | 🌻 🧋 🎼

i think of all of these little fellas sillabub is my favorite. several elements are balanced in her design—the standard jemima with a darker/reddish palette, the more softer and lighter sillabub design, the red eye patch from il sistina jemima, and the overall aesthetic of obc jemima with the big hair and wide, deepset eyes

i've seen her typical design critiqued by some people and wanted to incorporate those critiques by making her look less similar to demeter/bombalurina, adding more red to her body fur, and making her makeup more distinct and less... wooo girl give us nothing. and i included the squiggly on her collarbone

i also really REALLY love her overall aesthetic of sweet kindhearted girl NAMED AFTER A DEMON WITH SHADOW THE HEDGEHOG COLORING AND GIGANTIC SPIKED COLLAR !!!! so i decided to push it by making the collar definitely too big for her, giving her a slightly "edgy" outfit and making her hair resemble devil horns

as for character stuff, i think she has magical powers though i haven't developed exactly What they are yet. beyond her sweet exterior they trouble her. [whispers] i also think shes demeters little sister. she would be 18 in human years, a few months younger than electra and tumblebrutus

pouncival | 🌱 🩹 🍵

i struggled with pouncival's clothing design like i did electra's because i didn't go into drawing him with a particular gimmick in mind. but i think i'm happy with the casual formal look. it makes him look like such a kind young man even if he's a little shit

i did have a lot of fun trying to make his makeup distinctive from tumblebrutus'—so many fellas with brown eyepatches ! so his colors are more dark and striking. i also tried to make him look less like Typical Cis Man by giving him a bit of black lipstick

enjoy his freckles too

but like. i think hes literally such a little cis guy. nothing else for me to add for my specific interpretation of him it's all laid out. this guy fucking loves rocket league, fishing and chess. he'd be 19 in human years

tumblebrutus | 🎡 🥊 🍦

SWEET TUMBLEBRUTUS. i think drawing him here gave me a soft spot for him. with his outfit mirroring cettie's i didn't much struggle with that. his colors are also based on obc tumblebrutus

when i was first conceptualizing my own versions of the cats i wanted at least one of them asides from grizabella to have wavy fur. and idk what it is, maybe it's the lack of content for him, but i was really drawn to the idea of curly tumblebrutus!

i wanted their design to be distinctive from pouncival's so i made their colors softer, kinda watercolor-y. OH AND THEIR FUR IS ALSO MEANT TO BE A LITTLE TRANS FLAG COLORED

as for character, i think he is also a bit troubled, as a son of grizabella's. you heard me, people. i'm probably the first person ever to headcanon that. he'd be 18 in human years

AND THAT'S ABOUT IT ! thank you for reading this far, have a great day and stay tuned for more designs in the days to come !

[localgardenweed]

Mega awesome HRE and Chibitalia art dump cause i’m on that high rn

These doodles are on my old AU I tried to make a game with friends for a gamejam but had to drop out but still forever haunt my mind begging to be made. I'm still figuring out a lot of the plot and ideas for the story i guess and playing with ideas and concepts of the world and characters. Mainly Death and Earth personified, since they're original creations ya know, especially Death cause they're kinda the antagonist. TLDR Whole plot of the story is that HRE is dying and Death was supposed to make it comfortable for him for giving peace of mind but they were sick and tired of it and kinda punished him for being a greedy power hungry little shit.

In these doodles they're supposed to be dancing together in a ballroom, the jig is up and Death is opening up to HRE and probably giving exposition, probably talk about how they were wrong to do that to HRE, why they lashed out and asking if he wants to do something before he takes his life for good. I have a few old doodles where I designed the dress and stuff, the scene was also drafted to still be in the dream world/ HRE unknowingly thinking this is reality so this was going to be his final moment before the big reveal and Death snapping. Was also gonna be a mini game maybe where you had to do a memory game to remember the steps

These are for when HRE finally discovers everything in the game/story was all just this dream world and he never got that closer with Italy or his brother and where Death gets frustrated and just has a whole rant about their true feelings about humans and the personified countries. The scythe is so shit im sorry. The dream world throughout the game keeps getting flooded with this black goo, which in reality is just this limbo space before a soul makes it to the afterlife, as Death has a harder and harder time keeping the world together and/or just to fuck with HRE and make him paranoid

Here is a alternative version where Death takes off the disguise, probably doing the same thing as the last one but ya know just a bit different. In my note I drabble the idea that the disguises are made with the help of Earth since death ya know kinda kills shit so they can't really create stuff, in this scene I also had a idea where (kinda gorey sorry) they even pull off the skin and hair to reveal their true skeleton form to HRE.

These were just fun doodles, played around with sketching with highlighter and going over in pen which was super fun. I also just wanted to draw Chibitalia, cause idk he's silly. These were kinda just warmups and experiments cause art block has been hitting like a TRUCK.

I hope one day I can still bring this idea to game form, maybe blow the dust off RPG maker or try to get a team together again to work on it but who knows. IN ANOTHERR LIFFEEEE I WOULD BE YOUR GIIRRRRLLLLLL

[crimeboys]

20 Questions For Fanfic Writers!

tagged by @lunelicmoone thank you so much :D

1: How many works do you have on Ao3?

32

2: What's your total Ao3 word count?

265,600 <- EVEN NUMBER POG

3: What fandoms do you write for?

dsmp actively!! written for spn and hannibal in the past

4: Top five fics by kudos?

it's nice to be wanted

blood and cigarettes

oh, how i want to be free

washed up

has the moon lost her memory?

this list actually surprised me bc i expected oh, how i want to be free at the top and didn't realize has the moon lost her memory? was that well-liked

5: Do you respond to comments? Why/Why not?

I TRY SO HARD. i really struggle with it for some reason bc i like.want to thank people and talk to them about the fic but also don't want to spoil and i feel like i just repeat myself a lot and yeah ]:

6: What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

the dark of our graves ig? it's like. fully angst though. the ending is just kind of the knowledge that wilbur is worse now and about to make that everyones problem. but also ig that fic is like. a snapshot of a whole story so idk if that counts. moderation ig, tommy and quackity are miserable af ! wait fuck me i was going through my list and flying actually probably takes it, i give tina and hannah gay love for five seconds and then erm well. i don't know i love making bitches miserable a lot of my fics are sad.

7: What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

probably either your world and mine (my osmp rocketduo fic) or it's nice to be wanted :]

8: Do you get hate on fics?

no which is good bc i am a spiteful little man

9: Do you write smut?

no, if there is ever sex in my fics i tend to fade to black and go Please look away this is private.

10: Do you write crossovers?

no, i don't like putting the characters i like in the same universe i like putting one set of them in the other universe and making them miserable within it instead.

11: Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not to my knowledge!

12: Have you ever had a fic translated?

yeah, blood and cigarettes was translated to russian!

13: Have you ever co-written a fic before?

no i am kind of scared of doing that actually i would get nervous.

14: What's your all-time favorite ship?

uhh idk recency bias says ctntduo

15: What's the WIP you hope to finish but doubt you ever will?

teehee

16: What are your writing strengths?

dialogue

17: What are your writing weaknesses?

description and conclusions. ending a fic is my worst nightmare im so bad at figuring out the right note. actually beginnings too i struggle to figure out exactly where to begin.

18: Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

sometimes people speak other languages so ? positive? if someone ever speaks in a language i don't understand in a fic i simply use google translate.

19: First fandom you wrote for?

percy jackson !! i actually probably wrote sonic the hedgehog fanfic when i was younger but i don't really remember i just remember drawing little comics.

20: Favorite fic you've ever written?

tbh i really enjoy blood and cigarettes. shoutout to bell forever for inspiring me to write that thang

tagging: @belltheash @bonesandthebees @lacystar @ literally anyone who wants to do it im completely blanking on all the writers i know rn. even if we are not mutuals just say i tagged you idgaf have fun !

[vacantgodling]

🖊🖊🖊, Julissa, San and Chidori !

thank youuuu 🥺🥺

juls my baby haha you deserve so much better 😭 some random factoids about juls: she loves the color yellow (has a yellow phone case, yellow amp, yellow guitar—you get the idea) bc of a near death experience in her childhood involving a yellow elevator. if i say anymore it’s spoilers but she holds that color close for a reason lol. she’s also very bi. the narrative does focus a lot on her attraction to joaquin (bc he’s hot like 😭) but i know from Meta she is attracted to pretty much all the friends she has except rene bc rene has a gf and he’s not really her type lmao. but saul, andres, daisy & joaquin she’s 👀. honestly when i write draft two i think im gonna try to make it More obvious that she’s attracted to all of them lol. in the “it never happened” au they’re a polycue to me. she adores her older sister juvia and would fight tooth and nail for her, but she has an estranged relationship from both of her parents. her original goal at the start of the book is to become a famous recording artist but her dream quickly shifts to i just want to be a one hit wonder. make one great song, get money and fame, then disappear from the public eye. she’s both headstrong and cowardly at the same time—just a girl full of juxtapositions lol

san 🤌🏾🤌🏾 SHE. so, san is a hunter—hunters are the first specialized fighting class that ever came into being in terrae (came about around 450-470 but i cant be assed to pull out the timeline rn) as a response to the decimation and overrun of the first capital city of terrae, argos. hunters are very proud of their heritage and it’s pretty unusual for them to enter guilds but san (and her sister moira by proxy) are some of the few exceptions. hunters are ALL ABOUT DAMAGE BABY. armor? who needs that we die like men. they tend to wear revealing, hardly armored clothes made of leather and hides, decorated with furs, spikes and belts (this goes for all genders—it came about bc when hunters came into being there was a huuuuge shortage on materials to make armor so they just went without and it’s become a tradition at this point). san herself uses a short sword and a whip, usually in tandem. she’s the youngest of the mc bunch, and it kind of shows in her temper 😅. she has a huge grudge against her elder sister (aforementioned moira) and hates being seen as weak. she’s very argumentative and untrusting, which isn’t unusual for someone from eros however san does take it to an extreme. it does eventually mellow out for her as she learns to trust her team but MAN she has them all going through it for awhile lmao

chidorkyyyyy. i’ve rambled about him so much already tbh lol but something i do wanna draw attention to is despite how fun loving, energetic, clumsy etc that he is, he’s extremely good at his job as a train master. it’s like he was born for it in many ways. i get the whole thing of having mcs who are incompetent bc they have to learn and they’re underdogs but i don’t really want that for chidorky? like he’s quite skilled and it’s hard to tell Why bc he’s never done this before yknow! he also has great chemistry with his weapon, torment, which is embedded with cool ass glowing pink gems btw. but i haven’t figured out the entire weapon system i just know it’s one of those “your weapon chooses you” situations. he can be very serious when he needs to be and it throws people off guard tho basically lol

[hopefulnothopelesss]

AHHHHHH SHE THINKS IM PRETTY TOOhfifndicnidndjfnfjdncjdb we both are fresh out of relationships but we’re both clearly aware that things got emotionally intense between us so fast and we’ve been otp for hours everyday since we started talking i can tell we’re both trying to not cross any lines platonically while we’re still figuring and feeling things out w each other since we’re both not ready for a relationship but we both feel that strong draw towards each other and SHEs a Scorpio and SHE SAID SHES A LIL OBSESSED W ME AND THAT SHES TOLD ME THINGS THAT SHE HASNT TOLD anyone AND MY HEART 🥺🫶 AND THAT SHE CHECKS HER PHONE FOR MY NOTIFICATIONS WHENEVER I TAKE FOREVER TO REPLY BCJDNDJJDJD MY HEArt

i like what we have rn. No one is putting pressure to or rushing into anything and we’re taking it day by day but still kinda gently flirting and letting things grow. She thinks my rambling is cute and she likes my voice and downloaded apex on her Xbox for me and just JFUFIFNDKKENDI. She’s also so emotionally intelligent since she works in mental health which is just 🤌🏽 I’m not in a hurry to rush into a relationship w her if it gets to that I kinda wanna just let things unfold naturally, however long that takes and not put any pressure :)) as long as she continues to grow her obsession w me lollll. and even if nothing romantically ever happened between us, I’d even just be okay staying platonic bc I already do value and cherish her in my life. That’s why I kinda am just taking it day by day and enjoying her presence and getting know her and our convos :3 all great things take time develop. Rome wasn’t built in a day <3

Also I’m being way to excited here but the pattern defined our relationship bond as “soulmates” while my ex and I were described as “complex” 😅😫😫😫

AND OFC SHES A SCORPIO

[criminal-sen]

I finally saw Nope (Jordan Peele's new-ish horror movie) and uhhh it's been stuck in my head ever since, so I'm gonna talk about it. It's not *quite* on my All Time Favorite Horror List (a thing that barely even exists in my head, let alone in printed form) but it's up there for sure. And do you want to know what really did it for me? It was the fucking RESTRAINT they used - not only in showing the Threat, but in picking apart its exact workings. I would say they slipped up a little bit here in the finale, as the protagonists do actually figure out a lot, but im giving it a pass. Because this movie is a horror, for sure, but it's also a story about black people overcoming that horror and standing victorious at the end, and the meta sense of catharsis that comes from that. I actually.. don't remember exactly how Us ended - a lot of that film kinda flew over my head bc im bad at media analysis stuff uhhh what is it, film theory? Yah i didnt.. take that. And my brain is like 'fun movie scary monster weeeee' for the most part. But i did manage to gather that between Get Out and Nope, Jordan Peele is sick of black characters dying, so hes 'fixing' the endings to be happy. And i think thats really fucking cool and also really fucking important. So yeah tldr it's okay they did the thing I usually don't like, and they still used more restraint than other movies, who don't even have a reason for it other than.. idk. Pissing me off

Oh right the other restraint they used, which I've seen talked about before, is in showing too much onscreen. Yknow like.. the horror movies that are scary as shit until the monster is revealed to be some cgi.. stupid fucking whatever... and a switch flips in your brain taking you from scared to annoyed. Yah they managed to not show parts they knew wouldn't work, then REALLY show parts they knew they could get right. Like the ending???? That was so fucking cool looking, like I cannot with that design, I fuck with it heavily and kinda want to draw it but. It also looks hard to draw lol

Okay well there was one specific scene especially, but it's a big plot spoil so I'm not gonna say it. But my favorite scene in the whole movie is one that's apparently quite divisive- some ppl hate it and say it looks like a fuckin car wash lmfao (and I'm being as spoiler-free as possible but that should give away the scene to ppl who've seen it) - but it's demonstrating that perfect balance of showing JUST enough to let your imagination fill in the rest. And I thought they did a damn good job with what was shown- between the fuckin hair raising screams and cries of the ppl in there, to the chaotic camerawork, like you're in there too and you're only getting glimpses, to the revelation itself, the massive OH SHIT of a plot reveal that's hitting so much harder than a detached 'we've figured it out' scene bc it's putting you IN it* and showing you the sheer, uncaring violence of it, and now you're finally understanding why the thing with the chimp (also???? Fucking horrifying???? But ngl it was also weirdly satisfying to see it fictionally portrayed??? bc yes, a chimp will fuck you up, just leave them be and shit like this won't happen ffs) exists in a movie about horse ranchers trying to film a UFO

*😏if you've watched it, do u.. do u see what I did there😏😏😏 also I might need to make another post with spoilers bc im a bit obsessed with it rn, I'm pretty sure they even snuck in an Akira reference (especially cuz they did the very obvious motorcycle slide later)

[strwbrrypoundcake]

For anyone who wants to recover on their own but isn't sure how, here's how I plan to do it once I reach my ugw

Look up how many calories you need to maintain the weight you are at

Increase your calories by 100 every week or 2 weeks until you are at that number (some examples are switching from sugar free coffee creamer to regular coffee creamer, adding more protein powder in smoothies etc. and you can always add a protein shake but make sure you add lots of protein)

Other examples are switching from nonfat to low-fat yogurt, then to full fat yogurt. Adding granola to yogurt is also a great way to increase calories. Adding an egg to whatever breakfast you eat. If you already eat eggs for breakfast try adding low-fat yogurt or toast with peanut butter. You can even use wheat bread so you're still being healthy

Once a week, have a bite of a fear food. A candy bar, pasta, take out etc. Then throw it away or find someone in your life who will take it.

Switch to easy bodyweight/weightlifting workouts, it will help you put on lean muscle so when you do gain weight(it won't be that much) it doesn't really look like you've gain. It will be slightly more than if you were putting on fat instead but you will look mostly the same, just healthier

Every morning, write down what you want out of recovery. "I want to be able to go out with friends and not worry about how I look or the food I will eat" "I want to grow my hair" "I want to be stronger" etc. even if it's the same every morning, write it down

Start journaling. Before anyone groans (which I totally understand if you do) I know more than anyone how annoying being told to journal is. It's been shoved down my throat my whole life. But this journal has a purpose. Every time you are triggered, seeing someone skinny, a fight with someone who affects you, abuse etc. You write down what happened, why you are triggered, what your immediate response is (like, "I'm never eating again" or "I need to reduce my calorie intake). Why that's a bad idea (it will only make me feel worse in the long run, etc) and what you can do instead and why it's a good idea, (I'm going to crochet because the repetitiveness relaxes me. Im going to draw my frustrations to get these negative thoughts out of my head etc)

One thing I learned in ed rehab is throwing things like ice and apples. If you don't want to waste food, get some ice and throw it at something hard, (pavement, concrete etc). If you cannot do this because of strict parents or other reasons, write down why you are upset on a piece of paper and tear it up into little pieces, crumple it up etc. you can do this right over a trash can with no mess

Have good messages around you, it can be quotes or things you come up with yourself.

Stop looking in the mirror, I know it's hard, but I promise it will help. Don't stop completely, try to limit it to looking at yourself in the mirror once a week, for no more than a minute. If you have any negative thoughts about your body, close your eyes and imagine doing something to that thought to kill it, then replace it with something neutral ("I have arms and legs" "I have a jawbone" "I have internal organs" "my legs are used to walk and get me places") you can replace with positive ones right away if you want, but I know that's hard for a lot of people including me. So if you can't, start with neutral ones and once you become more neutral about your body then start adding one positive thing each week

Do not weigh yourself. I know that's hard as well, as someone who weighs in every day rn it's going to be difficult. But you can do it. If you can, get rid of your scale. If not, that's totally okay, you can still learn to not weigh yourself. Figure out the time you normally weigh yourself (for me it's right after I wake up, usually in the morning around 8) and replace that with doing something you enjoy a lot (watching a YouTube video, playing with your pet, being in nature etc) make sure it's something you can get engrossed in. For each day you don't weigh yourself mark it with something, I'm going to do paper stars but you can do tallies, sticky notes etc.

If you do weigh yourself and it triggers you, distract distract distract. Read a book, watch a really funny movie etc. anything fun to get your mind off the numbers.

Having scheduled mealtimes with rough plans about what you will eat can help. For example, set alarms for times you want each meal to be (breakfast at 9, lunch at 1, dinner at 6 etc) then write down a very rough meal plan (example, eggs with a drink and peanut butter toast). Even if you cant stick to the meal plan, have something. Celery and peanut butter, protein bar, protein shake etc.

This one is really hard, but try not to let other people bring you down. I know a lot of ed's are the result of abuse, family issues etc. remind yourself they have no claim on the way you live your life. A normal, stable person does not try to control, put down or harm a person for simply existing. You are better than they ever will be, so don't let them hurt you because they are nothing but petty idiots who make themselves feel better by putting others down

Keep yourself busy. Don't let yourself have time for negative thoughts and behaviors. Hobbies, movies, tv shows. Be doing something most of the time

Yoga may help. I know it sounds cliche but it might help your relationship with your body. Learning yoga poses and moves is a great way to be proud of something your body can do. Plus, it's a good way to become aware of your body without looking in a mirror. Focusing on the muscle groups needed and breathing is a good exercise.

This is optional, and certainly not for everyone. If you find that w33d helps your appetite and mood, you can try it to help make you hungry and focus less on the ed thoughts. You do not need it to recover on your own, it's just a tool. I will personally be using it. If you do want to use w33d to help your journey I suggest a sativa dominant hybrid or something that's 50/50. If you don't already partake but would like to use it on your journey. I suggest finding people who also partake and becoming friends with them. I don't know what it's like to have no one in your life who does it because I have always known people who do. Make sure wherever you get it from is reputable. You may be able to find recs for people in your area to buy from if you can't get it from a d1spensary. I don't get mine myself, but someone I know gets it for me so you could try that if you think anyone would be willing.

Be forgiving. Recovery isn't linear and you are going to make mistakes, everyone does. Perfection does not exist for humans because we will always have flaws, perfection is the absence of flaws.

Beauty is subjective. If everyone was solely attracted to the beauty standard then non conventionally attractive people wouldn't be in relationships. But they are, because no matter what you look like there will be at least 100 people who find you the hottest person alive. Keep this in your mind. And if you have a partner encouraging weight loss and they know you struggle with an ED or you aren't 900 pounds. Then dump them, they don't deserve you. No partner with staying with will try to change you to their liking. They will love you for who you are and will only support changes you want to make to make yourself better. Just to be clear, if you are 900 pounds or considered overweight by medical professionals only, you deserve recovery just as much as anyone else. Recovery isn't about weight, it's about your health and relationship with food. Having a healthy relationship with food and getting sufficient exercise will cause weight loss on its own. If you're unsure, look up a healthy weight for your height and age, then look up the maintenance calories for it, then make that your goal you work up towards.

If you have a partner (bf/gf/SO), open up to them about your Ed and your desire to recover. They will be one of your most valuable assets. If they brush you off, put you down or don't believe you, dump them. That's not a true partner. It's one thing to not know how to help, it's an entirely different thing to ignore your partners feelings and struggles. Your partner doesn't have to do much, just be there for you. Maybe you eat together, maybe you cook together. Maybe they face time you while you eat to help distract you. Maybe they just provide words of encouragement "you're doing great" "im here for you on this journey".

Friends can be just as valuable a resource as a partner. If you don't have a partner or want extra support, open up to your friends. If you don't have any friends you can trust, join an online recovery group.

Ask people in your life to avoid comments about your body, positive or negative. Most people worth knowing will try their best to adhere to this, they will mess up sometimes but they will try. If they think it's stupid and won't try, then cut them off if you can. It's not that hard to avoid. (Instead of body compliments, clothes/hair/makeup/nails/achievements may work, like "your hair looks great today" "love your nail polish/nail art" "your makeup is awesome" "your outfit is cute/cool/awesome" etc.

If people in your life refuse to try not commenting on your body and you can't get away, they are normally trying to provoke you, put you down and/or make themselves feel better about their shitty life. When they comment something bad, simply reply, "okay" and repeat. Don't look at them if you can and keep a neutral expression. Or you could go for an overly cheery okay and look them in the eyes with the most genuine smile you can muster, then compliment them. It may make them uncomfortable. It's up to you to decide which one will work best for the person in your life.

No more negative Ed media. If you can, no Instagram or Tumblr. If you can't, delete your Tumblr and create a new one specifically for recovery or non Ed interests block any th1nspo tags you can think of and try putting other interests in your feed as well, like video games, books or fandoms. For Instagram, go through your following and block any ed accounts that aren't recovery based. If you are friends, send them a message saying that you are going into recovery and you are getting rid of all ties to negative Ed media. If you think you can keep contact with Tumblr/Instagram/Twitter mutuals, do it through a neutral app like snap, messenger or discord. If you have Ed Twitter follow the same steps as you do for Tumblr. Delete and create a new account.

If you have the ability, therapy. Doesn't specifically have to be for an ED, but learning how to cope with what life throws at you will help you get far. If you are unable/unwilling to do therapy, do your own. Free dbt workbooks, YouTube videos, texting your crisis hotline etc. these are all things you can do to teach yourself how to cope with life. Unfortunately trauma recovery is very hard to do without therapy, so I would suggest YouTube videos and if you can afford to purchase them, self help books about trauma.

Delete all triggering things from your phone, th1nspo pics, personal b0dy ch3cks etc.

That's all I got, remember this is not a set in stone thing. You can pick and choose what you think will work for you. Everyone deserves recovery, if you have Ed behaviors (restr1cting, b1nging, purg3ing) then you are sick enough, no matter what anyone tells you.

[fearowkenya]

i am so close to finishing my replay of ff7r ive got like maybe 4-6 hours left then i can FINALLY play intermission dlc so that i can FINALLY play rebirth and then FINALLY the mental crop rotation can go back to art or writing (altho i cant promise the art wont be ff7 focused for a while longer, cloud and associates got me gripped real tight rn)

(this got really long so im putting the rest under a readmore so it doesnt make anybodys dash like 5 miles long)

id really like to keep streaming when im done playing ff7 stuff, like art streams are smth id really like to do but im sort of at a loss for what to do setup-wise. i dont have the means or desire to put together a way to stream traditional art so it would have to be digital.

i detach my screen from my keyboard to draw on the touch screen which disconnects the screen from the graphics card i think. or SOMETHING like that . the graphics card I stream with is in the base of the laptop and obs does NOT play nice with the secondary one on the monitor. which means i cant stream with the screen detached.

ive tried streaming with my computer in Drawing Mode which essentially is with the screen on backwards so that its angled toward me with the keyboard inaccessible. it's annoying to stream like that tho because i can then ONLY use the touch screen and cant type anything or use keyboard shortcuts. its manageable if im not streaming but really annoying when im streaming and have to hop between drawing program and messing around w/ obs

i have a little bluetooth keyboard that i could use to get around this but its pretty tiny and while it DOES work the problem is that im not used to how the keys are spaced and i fumble constantly. also theres a delay in the input sometimes (i bought this keyboard from the secondhand store for like 4 dollars so it came with a little wear-and-tear)

and then trying to draw with the screen on normally obvious works the best streaming-wise but the angle that the screen is at with the keyboard in the way has my wrist hurting in like. 45 minutes.

i dont really want to use my external tablets - they're pretty old at this point and ive gotten used to drawing directly on the screen , and i have no desire to get a tablet with its own screen. i imagine cintiq and cintiq-equivalent tablets are still pretty pricey, and even if i had the budget, the entire point of me getting a touch screen computer was to be able to draw on it directly and cut down the number of steps it takes to get started, to keep the adhd demons at bay.

i think the solution is probably just adapting to the tiny bluetooth keyboard . i've messed around with using switch joycons for my keyboard shortcuts and while it actually worked really well it still doesnt fix the problem of shit keyboard access if i need to google a reference pic or smth lmao. touch screen keyboards just dont do it for me i always feel clumsy when im not able to actually feel separate keys. it frankly feels even worse than my tiny bluetooth keyboard

actually one of the main hurdles for me wrt drawing digitally is that i havent figured out a screen configuration that makes pulling up reference pictures feel seamless. its very jarring and clunky to have to tab between screens and i know theres a little window you can plop ref images into in clip itself but i Still find it pretty awkward to use. i think my screen size might be the issue though, so id probably want to use my tv as a second monitor and throw the ref images up there. which DOES work , ive tried it, but the problem is that . well. it's a touchscreen computer. and the bluetooth keyboard doesnt have a trackpad, because why would you need one for a touch screen. except that. the second monitor isn't a touch screen. its my entire goddamn television. i cannot access it via touchscreen. so i have to then plug in a mouse. and then at that point i am juggling the bluetooth keyboard, the joycons for faster keyboard shortcuts, AND a mouse to access the external monitor.

that setup is honestly doable i just feel so clumsy trying to navigate it. im sure with time id acclimate to it and it would become more streamlined as i make adjustments. im getting ahead of myself tho hahah im still at least five hours out from finishing my replay of remake, and then i hear the dlc is like ~4 hours so youd probably have to make that at least 6 for me because i play video games really slowly. and then rebirth is like what. 40 hours for just story?? jesus christ i just checked howlongtobeat and its over 80 hours with sidequests. thats like double the length of remake . GOD im so excited to play it aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[kin-the-muffin]

haha soooo many things happening rn and i feel like i have so much time to do nothing like i used to but when i take a step back sure i have less but i still have a lot but then i remember that theres homework im already ignoring in my classes and new friends to know and be known by and old friends to either dump cuz theyre toxic and i never realized or try in vain to keep ahold of a slipping relationship and im in my senior year now hahahaaaaa

vent below

i auditioned for my school’s musical and i finally got a speaking part and im also technically a lead and that rly cool but it also means im going to have to stay at school for twelve hours almost every day until the second week of march when the play ends

im in my school’s honor choir and its a zero hour so i have to wake up at unheavenly times to get there and sing for two and a half hours

i get to be in a rly big state choir too and thats coming up in february and i havent looked at the music yet and i cant get the remind to work and all the emails are so long-winded and badly-formatted and confusing

and my english class is nearly full of students so thats fun and my school has zero, count em, Z E R O good senior english teachers but im pretty sure i have the better of two devils and i had her last semester so i know her and she knows me but i also know the kinda bs shes gonna throw at us and i just have to hope that she wasnt lying when she said that this semester would be easier because we’re not working on senior papers this time (mine was about mental health in schools not that anyone asked lolll)

i also have the same government teacher as last semester which is both a blessing and a curse because i know what to expect but like none of it is good and he makes us do these stupid unnecessary tiny group projects and why tf cant i just work alone i only know one person in the class and his lectures are so pointless and please just let me take all the tests and be done with this heaven-forsaken class already

then im in studio art which is basically the highest level art class at my school and you have to get permission from an art teacher to be in one of their hours then you work on one huge independent project the whole semester and my art teacher knows i draw on my ipad and said i could make a comic so now i have to figure out what its about then i can hopefully start the ball rolling from there but i have too many ideas and not enough at the same time and none of them are developed enough to make a 22-page, fully edited-and-colored comic

and my choir director is so incredibly passive aggressive but not really on purpose, he just knows he has a rbf and so he overcompensates to make himself more friendly but then when his patience runs thin he yells and i wanna cry and die and quit high school and cry some more

and im trying so hard not to stress over college because i know im gonna take a gap year so i can think about it then but two of my sisters have offered their homes to me and i love them both so much and ive been thinking about just getting an apartment and a roommate but i have to tell them that because one of them is going to renovate their basement with my potential living there in mind and then i end up stressing about college anyways like what major and what minor and what school and what even is my endgoal???? i dont know?!?!??!?!! i dont know what i want to do with my life, not specifically! my biggest dream rn is to be an mc streamer and thats just cuz im back in my mcyt phase and the old pipe dream from my childhood has returned but i know it cant actually work out btu the dreamer in me says it can but i know it realistically has like a .000002% chance of actually happening

and thats all i have the energy to say rn

sorry for the rant

sorry for not posting

ty and goodnight

[opens-up-4-nobody]

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