#also this post has links to my history and growth with this fandom

[pixelatedraindrops]

Happy 1st Anniversary RainCode!

☔️6🔎30👻

Thank you for bringing me so much joy 💜💕

(and thank you for giving me the gift that is yuma kokohead)

I didn’t think I’d make art for it at first, but I figured this game has done so much for me, so I’ll give back by drawing the duo that started it all 💜🩷 These two are such an iconic pair and I will draw them together as much as possible c: (tho Shinigami will be mostly in her ghost form if I do)

First time drawing human form Shinigami non-chibi, and I admit she was a little tricky with that outfit. But I think I did it decently enough… xD

little bonus for the kokogami enjoyers 💕

miss death god is too much woman for this little boy to handle~ 🤭

i know he's an adult but can you honestly look at him without context and say this is a man??? he's just an eemey meemey little guy.

Personal Rambling below (because I love this game so much)

WARNING MINI ESSAY INCOMING (lmao)

Oh RainCode... Where do I even begin...

RainCode is a game that has changed my life along with likely many other people’s lives. Although the premise of it is fairly straightforward, the characters and atmosphere make this game so much more. The successor to Danganropa is honestly its own unique story and structure, and tbh I think I love and enjoy it far more than Danganronpa. But this game…is just so much more for me.

I truly never expected this game to be such an impact on my life, let alone become my next fixation.

So, for history, I was honestly in no real hurry to get the game on its release date last year, so I got it a day later. On July 1st, I played the game for the first time. And I didn’t think much of it at first. The only thing that was on my mind when I started this game, was that I was positive I was going to be treating the protagonist like Makoto Naegi and Kyoko Kirigiri’s son the whole time.

This was the first post I made about RainCode back on twitter in 2023.

Yeah... Kinda silly when I look at it now... XD But I do still beleive this headcanon.

When I started the game my 2016 fixation of Danganronpa came back a bit. As a previous DR lover, I did make comparisons here and there to all of the characters. Yuma was very much like Naegi with his shy and timid demeanor at first due to having amnesia, and it felt like déjà vu when playing through the start of the game. But then it happened. The moment that solidified Yuma as my next and now permanent target. When he got sick/dizzy on the train... God that moment still lives rent free in my head. (I know the cause of it was different/related to the first mystery/case, but as someone who enjoys any sort of sick whump moment, regardless of if its little crumbs or a whole-ass meal it still counted for me) I was still shy and hid in the shadows with my silly little niche back then, but I told myself. Yep, once I finish this game, I’m writing a sickfic for this game and he’s the victim. (though what surprised me was that I wasn’t alone on that, 3 other people made sickfics with yuma before I did so that was a pleasant surprise xD)

As the game went on it shocked and impressed me in many different forms. I realized that this game isn’t the Danganronpa clone I thought it would be. Sure, it had a lot of similar elements and mirrored mini games like Hangman’s Gambit, Spot Selection, and of course the Conclusion Comic of the whole case, but the story the world and the mysteries were honestly different from the way DR structured them. And it pleased me when not many people from the main team had died. Most of the deaths were of side characters that had appeared in their respective chapters. Which honestly was a breath of fresh air for me, and I think that’s the real reason it’s separate from DR. It’s not as cruel and not as stressful. It’s a lot more chill, but the mysteries were still enough to get me excited and look forward to the next maze I would enter. The mystery labyrinths were probably my favorites elements of the game. They were just so much fun. And every single character was so likeable, (yes even some of the peacekeepers were fun aside of one or two that I absolutely despise. mostly yomi and guillame lol but I guess I kinda like yomi a bit more bc of the fandom)

And I grew to love Yuma EVEN more. He is honestly one of the best written protagonists I’ve seen in a long time. It’s hard to do timid protagonists right, but RainCode definitely nailed it with Yuma. He had his moments, but it wasn’t enough to be obnoxious. He also shined in more ways than one. And my god, so many relatable moments… (I have anxiety too xD) He was so charming and cute the whole time and even had his badass moments. This little guy is the whole package and I LOVE him for that. Truly a unique and fun main character that blows every DR protagonist out of the water.

(Yes, I said what I said.)

And the ending, GOOD LORD THE ENDING?? It was so well executed, and the ending twist villain was immediately my second favorite character after the protagonist. I could go on about how much I loved the ending but if I did, we’d be here all day and I don’t want to spoil the entire game…so�� I’ll leave it at that.

When I finished the game, I was so satisfied. (Yes I love it more than DR, what are you gonna do about it?) It left me super happy and made me want to make some fan content for it. Though I was still very quiet on twitter and had a feeling since twitter is a more complicated platform, I couldn’t gush about the game too much due to fear of spoiling other people…and when one of your favorite characters is just the whole secret of the game’s core mystery, I couldn’t talk about it too much… >.>

So, then I did the unthinkable. I went back to tumblr… It’s a little embarrassing but this account is actually my old one I had from years ago. I was on tumblr more 2013 to 2017 before I abandoned the site when it no longer seemed fun and there were times that I’d rather forget... (let’s just say that I used to RP with my OCs and…one of my RP ex friends catfished me and it made me feel VERY uncomfortable. I wanted to forget it, so I ran away and never returned.) I was super nervous to come back and try to post again, so my first RC related post was about him being a naegiri child.

After that I began making more edits once I gained access to the sprites and full body arts. I made some Pokémon AU edits because those were always fun, and then I started making feverish edits of Yuma’s sprites. My first post ended up becoming a hit and I caught the attention of some people. They liked what I was doing so it gave me a bit of confidence to continue. I got even more attention, and it made my confidence go up even more.

And then I started trying to draw art again, something I gave up long ago. My first few arts were a little rocky at best, but so many people enjoyed it! One of my older arts ended up becoming pretty popular. Through this my few pieces of art, my many sprite edits, and my first fan fiction (Home Is Where The Heart Is) got me pretty well recognized in the Rain code community on here. So much so that I felt confident enough to give myself a title. The CEO of RainCode Whump or “Whumpcode” and all of this confidence made me decide to turn my blog into a fandom and sick whump blog. It became a full blown obsession that possessed my mind that I've become TOO passionate about. Never thought making these little guys suffer would bring me this much joy... XD

Over time, I’ve drawn more art and written more fics than I ever had for a fandom. Before I never ever made fandom art, and I would usually only write one sickfic per fixation. (my last ones being demon slayer and spy x family) But here I am, making more art pieces than I ever have before (hell even doing a MONTH ART CHALLENGE) and improving even! And having 7 fanfictions of RainCode, 6 with Yuma and one with Makoto. And those two became my prime targets and muses for my art. Drawing them is easier for me and they’re my favorites so it brings me such joy to draw them. I love MakoYuma so much. Maybe not so much romantically, but friendship and familial. They have such potential to be so much, and I adore them. Plus putting them in sicknarios and situations is fun (I think we can all agree on that haha)

I think I’m talking too much, so I will say one more thing. I never thought my fixation on this game would last this long. I was positive it would go away after just a few months at best. The game is great but nothing amazing to keep thinking about for too long for me. But I think the main reason I was able to keep my fixation on this game for almost a year (and ongoing) is because of the fandom. (specifically, the Tumblr fandom, but some people on twitter are cool too) I’m honestly so happy I returned to tumblr and was able to make a name for myself in this community. I have met so many talented artists and creators and even made some new friends (and even got a few apprentices to take under my wing) If it weren’t for everyone’s support, I don’t think I would have ever done this much and made it this far.

I’ve essentially made a platform for myself, and I didn’t think tumblr would be a place I’d check daily ever again. To think this silly little game…would change my life so much and make me happier than I’ve ever been in such a long time. I feel recognized and like I belong, I’m finally able to be loud and proud about my passions for sick whump and not worry too much about it, I’ve finally found my prime target and I have fun with him every time, I’ve gotten back into the arts of drawing and writing again and I think I’ve made some of my best work yet, and I’ve met so many wonderful people and even collaborated with them on some fun projects too! (Here's the most popular one and also the first one I did!)  It’s just been…so wonderful… I am so happy to be part of such a chill talented and fantastic community TwT So thank you everyone… this is all thanks to your support… <3

Sorry I’m getting a little mushy here aren’t I… x’D I just couldn’t be more grateful for this game if I tried… So, thank you so much Rain Code, for existing and doing so much for me and making me so happy… I have never had this much fun in a fixation before, and I never felt like I was ever truly part of any fandom and was always just a lurker. It feels so good to finally feel like part of a fandom you love, and also be well liked, admired and accepted by others despite your niche being a little on the odd side… XD

I really hope there will be a sequel for this game, and we’ll see all these wonderful characters again. After all I’ve been through with this title and how much joy and purpose it brought me, consider me a fan for life. I will be dedicated to every future title in this series and play the hell out of it. And I hope it gains a wider audience come October when it is released for more consoles. (Just hoping no weirdos take over and ruin it with stupid drama and horrible things like the DR fandom…)

Though once new fans come in and are also tumblr users…I wonder what they’d even think of me and my place and takes when it comes to this series… XD (hopefully they’ll be nice to me… XD)

Anyway, I’ve said enough.

Happy Anniversary RainCode!!

☔💜👻🔍

[valsverse]

‼️ MY EXPERIENCE WITH @girlkisser13

🚨 HARASSMENT & PLAGIARISM 🚨

i want to address a serious issue that has recently come to light regarding a user in the fanfiction community (@girlkisser13) with a concerning history of plagiarism and ongoing harassment. this situation involves not just the act of stealing someone else's work but also a troubling pattern of aggressive behavior that has surfaced, indicating a lack of accountability and growth. it’s crucial for us writers and fans to stand together against such actions to maintain a supportive and respectful community for all creators. with that being said, read below. transparency is key, so i want to share the full context of this situation, including all relevant screenshots. underlined words/sentences include links to posts that are relevant to the incident, so i encourage you to check them out. (if you've recently received a message from an anonymous user about this situation, click here)

SECTION 1 : The Original Plagiarism Incident + Backstory

on june 3, 2023, i was notified by an anonymous user in my inbox that an account called girlkisser14 (now known as girlkisser13 after deactivating her old account) was plagiarizing my work. she repeatedly lifted sections of my writings and headcanons, merging them into her own posts. (note that i pretty much exclusively write for the percy jackson fandom.) after reaching out to her privately i discovered that i could no longer view her posts. at first, i thought she had taken her account down, but it turned out she had just blocked me. by june 5, 2023, i decided to create a post detailing the situation, which you can read here. shortly after, she contacted me, and we managed to come to a resolution. it seemed like a good opportunity for her to acknowledge her mistakes and learn from them. i updated my original post to reflect that the issue had been resolved. later on, she messaged me saying she couldn’t cope with the backlash. while i’m unsure if she was genuinely receiving hate, i felt sympathy for her situation. she asked me to take down the post, but i declined as accountability is important to me and i didn't feel comfortable with just erasing history. soon after, she deactivated her account.

although she deactivated her original account, she shortly after created a new one. i was notified by a different anon about this because her posts were moved to the new account, and some still included my work—presumably by accident. from that point on, she became known as girlkisser13, which can be confusing given her original username was girlkisser14. initially, she missed a few paragraphs of my work, as mentioned earlier, which prompted me to make a post about it (as seen in screenshot 2). however, she reached out to me, and we clarified everything through direct messages. after that, all seemed well!

however, things would get much worse from here. (this main character ahh dialogue bro.. 💀)

SECTION 2 : Account Tries a New Persona, Still Fails at Not Harassing Me.

(september 21st, 2024) an anonymous account messaged me with the following:

to be honest, i was completely baffled. i had completely forgotten about this issue, and out of nowhere, someone decides to bring it back up. it struck me as strange because… who gets so personal over something like this?

the user, which goes by the handle 'multifandombisexual13' also sent the exact same message directly to me, which made it clear that the anonymous message came from them, as shown.

first of all, the usernames are incredibly similar. both have the number 13, and girlkisser13 is a multifandom account. if you look at their profile, you'll notice they only repost stories from girlkisser13. even on the "check out these accounts" sidebar, there's only one account listed: girlkisser13. this is because they only repost content from that account.

let’s be real—this isn’t the behavior of a genuine fan. who goes through that much trouble? it’s obvious that this is girlkisser13 under an alternate handle.

i raised these concerns with the user, and i made sure to respond in a civil manner.

they didn’t respond to my initial message and only replied after I reached out to girlkisser13. i sent her a message about this situation. (just to be clear, this user and girlkisser13 are the same person.)

the user then responded at 4:38 PM. note that her main account, girlkisser13, replied to my message at 4:42 PM. (less than 5 minutes apart.) classic. (dates and times are included right under the text.)

if it wasn’t obvious by now, this person has been harassing me from their alt while pretending to be an innocent bystander on their main account. it’s like they’re playing both sides—using one account to send nasty messages and the other to act like they have no clue what’s going on. it’s honestly ridiculous and kind of sad at this point. (you will most likely have to zoom in to read the screenshots.)

you get the idea: this account goes off on personal jabs, claiming i have some need for control and a massive ego just because i refused to take the post down. i defended myself (obviously), but then she decided to accuse me of being jealous. (???)

i’ve made it clear SO many times—the post stays up for accountability. but no, she’s built up this entire fictional scenario where i’m obsessed with who’s getting more notes or attention. i promise you, i literally could not care less.

every single message is her droning on about “jealousy” or my supposed "ego and control issues," but never once acknowledging the actual point. it’s about holding people accountable for their actions. this isn’t a competition or a takedown—it's about transparency and honesty in the community. and to try and reduce it to some petty jealousy battle? that’s honestly ridiculous and completely out of touch.

like, she’s sitting there imagining i’m losing sleep over someone’s follower count on tumblr of all places. does she even realize how absurd that sounds? i'm a high school student who posts fanfic maybe once a month in a small fandom. tumblr is not my life, and there's definitely nothing here for me to be jealous of.

i don’t care how well someone is doing, i care about transparency and keeping things honest in the community. now, let’s address the obvious here. it’s super weird for another account to be going so hard defending a situation they supposedly have no part in. like, who does that? no one would go to these lengths unless they were personally connected, right? i brought up this whole issue in these screenshots below:

funny how they only stopped harassing me once i mentioned, at the end of my paragraph, that i’d happily make this public. up until that point, it was nonstop. i kept pressing them on whether they were connected to girlkisser13 (and if you somehow forgot—yes, this account and girlkisser13 are the exact same person). it was obvious, but i just wanted them to admit it.

it was around this time that i decided to message her main account, girlkisser13, to clear things up. i figured it was best to go straight to the source and get some clarification, but of course, things only got more suspicious from there.

SECTION 3: Ongoing harassment just a heads-up to pay attention to the account names at the top so you know who I'm messaging.

i like how i don't even have to comment on this part lmao. i sent the situation to girlkisser13 at 11:01 PM, and then at 11:39 PM, their other account decides to confront me about it.

anyways, i tried to get some honest answers from girlkisser13, but it was all just denial. at the very least, i asked her to reach out to the "other user" to stop the harassment.

at this point, girlkisser13 decided to backtrack and throw in an apology. i mean, i still firmly believed they were the same person, but honestly? i was just so exhausted from the whole ordeal that i thought, “whatever, let’s just agree and move on.”

SECTION 4: The Slip Up: GirlKisser13's Attempt at Damage Control

almost immediately after the conversation shown before, i received 13 messages TOTAL in my inbox, all in rapid succession, so obviously, they were all from the same person. i won't show them all because they're essentially the same. each one harassed me about my plagiarism post still being up, mentioning girlkisser13, and accusing me of jealousy in the same short, lowercase writing style. i brought this issue up to girlkisser13.

the first slip-up happened when I received a message from her alternate account, multifandombisexual13. up until that point, all the messages had come through anonymously, but it seems she forgot to enable the anonymous option this time.

shortly after, i got a message in the same style from her main account, girlkisser13. need i say more?

so, naturally, i sent the screenshot over to her main account, just to see what she'd say. and what did i get in return? excuse after excuse. it was honestly kind of impressive how quickly she could come up with new stories to cover her tracks. each response was more outlandish than the last, trying to justify what was blatantly obvious.

my brother sent that message!" yes—because your brother just happens to have access to your account. yes, because your brother happens to also be on tumblr, spending his time catching up on the latest percy jackson fanfiction drama... 💀 the sheer absurdity of it all. the pathological lying is honestly embarrassing at this point.

and, of course, the apologies only start rolling in after she's been caught—clearly just an attempt to redirect the drama and save face.

embarrassing...

SECTION 5: FINAL THOUGHTS—My Brain Hurts

in conclusion, this user does not deserve a platform on this app. she has failed to learn from her past mistakes and has clung to an incident that happened over FOUR MONTHS AGO. it’s time for accountability in our community.

harassment and deception have no place in spaces dedicated to creativity and expression. when individuals prioritize personal vendettas over respect and integrity, they tarnish the very essence of what fandom is meant to be.

it’s crucial that we foster an environment where originality is celebrated and where creators feel safe to share their work without fear of retaliation or harassment.

i highly encourage you to read everything i’ve shared and form your own opinion on the incident, but now you know my point of view.

ADDRESSING COMMON QUESTIONS

1. Isn’t this just a personal dispute?

while this situation is personal to me, it reflects broader issues within our fandoms. it’s not just about my experience; it’s about creating a community that values respect and integrity. we should all feel safe to share our work without fear of harassment or plagiarism. no one should feel comfortable stealing others' hard work or bullying creators into silence.

2. Why are some of the photos lower quality than others?

tumblr has a 30-photo limit, which meant i had to manually combine certain screenshots in a photo editor to get everything in. i also wanted to save space to make sure the most important screenshots could be posted in their highest quality. this is especially noticeable in the banter between me and her alternate account (see Section 2).

3. Why didn’t you just take down the post like she asked? Are you really jealous of her like she accused you of?

• absolutely not. i kept the post up for accountability. this was never about ego, jealousy, or a desire for control, as she accused me of—it’s about making sure people are aware of what happened and holding someone responsible for their actions. removing the post would allow her to escape the consequences of her behavior, which isn’t fair to me or anyone else she may target in the future. trying to turn this into a jealousy issue is a distraction tactic, and honestly, it’s irrelevant to the conversation. it’s not about followers or popularity—it’s about principles. 4. Why make this public? • because i gave her chances to handle this privately, and she chose to continue the harassment. this could have ended quietly, but she made the decision to escalate it. i’m not going to stay silent about someone who continues to lie, harass, and try to manipulate others.

5. Is it really that big of a deal?

yes. i know this whole situation is a bit silly, but plagiarism and harassment are serious issues, whether they happen online or in real life. it’s not just about fanfiction; it’s about respecting people’s work and holding individuals accountable when they cross boundaries.

to wrap this up, if you have any questions or concerns about the situation, feel free to reach out to me. i’ve tried to lay everything out as clearly as possible while trying to get this information out as quickly as possible, but i’m open to any clarifications or further discussion. i honestly don’t know how far this will reach or how many people will see it, but I think it’s important to at least try. for accountability’s sake, i’m tagging all the fandoms she’s active in, so all people can be aware of what’s been happening. hopefully, this will help set a standard in our community for respecting each other’s work and holding people accountable when they cross the line. i understand that some may want to defend her, but it’s crucial to consider the pattern of behavior exhibited. defending someone who has repeatedly shown disrespect for others’ work can enable harmful actions. i encourage people to look at the evidence and form their own opinions rather than simply siding with someone based on personal feelings.

thank you for your time!! ©valsverse— do not steal, edit, or repost my works. plagiarism is prohibited.

[leroiestmortvivelareine]

Numbers in aftg - MASTER LIST

Links to the posts everyone's been making about Nora's numerical symbolism

(For other types of aftg symbolism see this post by @feelingthedisaster)

— Nora numbers games - by @darkblueboxs and @whydamnitwhy

— Number symbolism - by @kevrenee and @tiredjustsoverytired

— More number symbolism - by @muscatos

— Number 3 - by @odetojupiter

— Number 4 - by @odetojupiter

— Number 13 - by @odetojupiter

— Number 13 - by @kevindavidday

— Number 13 additional - by @kevindavidday

— Number 19 - by @odetojupiter

— Numbers for Jean, Jeremy, Kevin, Renee - by @honoragreyskull

— Numbers for Jean, Jeremy, Neil - by @dkyla13

— Numbers for Jean, Andrew - by @you-know-i-get-itt

— Numbers for Nicky, Andrew, Aaron - by @minyard-05

— Numbers for Andrew, Neil - by @atlalasassy

— Numbers for Neil vs Riko - by @mis-n-the-unwise

— Numbers for Neil vs Aaron - by @boatshoesdude

— Numbers for Seth vs Renee - by @mis-n-the-unwise

— Numbers for Andrew - by @irasthingies

— Numbers for Kevin - by @flameheart413

— Kevin eleven (which is my new favourite store) - by @millportisntreal et al

— Numbers for Thea - by @odetojupiter

— Numbers and Wymack, the Perfect Court - by @you-know-i-get-itt

— Numbers and Wymack - by @doodlingstuff

— Japanese numerals - by @snazzy-jas-z-is-a-fan-of

— Magic numbers - by @high-queen-of-the-court

— Nora's extra content (master link provided by @peggyrose19) has a lot to say about numbers

— This post on the history of aftg by @coldsaturn provides stats about the growth of the fandom

Also:

— Neil’s father gave him numbers that kept decreasing; Andrew gave him numbers that kept increasing.

If you can add anything please share !

(I keep a running list of edits in the reblog)

[siflshonen]

Eijiro Kirishima: Positively Reclaiming National Identity and Making Masculinity More Inclusive (featuring surprise guest Mina Ashido!)

Link to the Bakugo presentation 2.0: Part 1 | Part 2

Link to the Bakugo presentation 1.0: Part 1 | Part 2

Link to the Kirishima presentation 1.0

Link to the Todoroki presentation

Link to the Deku presentation

Link to the Uraraka-Bakugo-Toga presentation

Link to the Shigaraki-All for One presentation

Link to the Spinner-Shigaraki-Bakugo-Deku presentation

Link to the BNHA presentations masterpost

Welcome to the Kirishima presentation 2.0!

What you are about to read combines manga analysis, meta analysis, trope breakdowns, watered-down Japanese history as explained by an outsider Westerner (please take it with a grain of salt), and thematic parallels with other characters. Beware of spoilers up to manga chapter 383.

This “presentation” post discusses Eijiro Kirishima’s character and arc as well as the real-life references his character’s aesthetic and “manly” actions and credo are meant to communicate. This post includes a discussion of Japanese delinquents and bosozoku, a brief and simplified history of the relationship of Japanese hypermasculinity and military and naval power, a brief discussion of kouha and nanshoku, and a brief general analysis of how Kirishima's early-series insecurities reflect those of an “emasculated” and outdated Japan in relation to Mina’s “effeminate” Japan of today. It also compares Kirishima and Mina’s history and character growth to Deku and Katsuki. Some of the Wikipedia links are also mildly NSFW, so be careful.

If you take whatever I say about the story personally, or get upset about spoilers that’s on you. On the flip side, if you have something to say on context and history, tell me more! If I offend or misinform in the context of history, please let me know! I have only one perspective, and it is my own.

The color key will make sense in time. I promise.

Who Is Eijiro Kirishima?

Personally, I love Scorpia. I also love Kirishima. But I do not like it when Kirishima is portrayed to be just like Scorpia in fandom works. Sure, they have similarities (some of which may or may not have been intentionally chosen for Scorpia’s part), but they do not have the same character arcs.

In particular, Kirishima’s arc is very pointedly about his pride and identity as a modern Japanese boy unlearning his internalized toxic masculinity and biases as he grows into a man.

But let’s start with the basics.

In case Kirishima’s association with his nation of origin wasn’t clear, his name is a dead giveaway.

Ei: sharp or keen

Ji: kid or newborn

Ro: son

Kiri: jagged or to cut

Shima: island

Eijiro means, as this kind person on the internet puts it, “sharp boy”. They also point out that the “Ei” is written in a way not ordinarily associated with names (which is usually “sharp” like “keen” or “intelligent”), so his name subtly “blunts” his intelligence while still pointing (ha) out that he’s a guy made of sharp rocks. And while that’s cute, it’s his last name that gives us more mileage for interpretation.

Kirishima. “Cut island”. Japan is a nation made up of multiple islands.

Kirishima is meant to be, very literally, a fresh-eyed child of his nation. He is emblematic of masculine heritage and identity. That’s a little more nuanced than saying Kirishima is Japan, but he definitely represents a significant pre-World War II slice of it. And he is on a mission to improve himself, and therefore the country, through a new and improved kind of “manliness”. Plus Ultra, bitches.

Kirishima is a truly wonderful guy and a unifying factor for the class.

One of the first people Kirishima forms a friendship with is Bakugo. I pointed out some of the similarities between Bakugo’s chosen presentation inspiration and Crimson Riot’s background in the Bakugo presentation. I’ll explore that extensively later on, but just keep in mind that it’s not exactly surprising that Kirishima is one of the first to find a common understanding with the class’ resident foul-mouthed, delinquent, western-style-military-costumed bomb.

One of Kirishima’s most notable qualities is his tendency to describe anything he thinks is positive - the ability to show emotional strength as well as physical, shed tears and show sensitivity, do something competently, show consideration for others, act heroically in a general sense - as “manly”. The gender of the person performing the admirable action is irrelevant.

That last part is a big deal for his character, so I will say it again. The gender of the person performing the admirable action is irrelevant.

Crimson Riot, Japanese Delinquents, and “Manly Codes”

Kirishima’s penchant for calling admirable things “manly” isn’t random - it comes from someone else. His personal hero and role model, Pro Hero Crimson Riot, inspires him to use the language and associate it with positive things not limited or defined by gender. Crimson Riot’s dress, speech, and mannerisms, from which Kirishima also draws inspiration, also tell us a lot about him and his beliefs. Basically, we know he’s a Japanese delinquent/Yankee or bosozoku (which is basically a delinquent on a motorbike.)

Crimson Riot’s “manly” credo is rooted in the values and presentation of this real-world delinquent subculture.

If you read the Bakugo presentation, you’ve seen this slide before.

The term “Yankee” was brought over by US soldiers (if you are from the States, you likely already know that a Yankee is someone from the northeast part of the country) and became synonymous with someone from the United States. Japanese delinquents are called “Yankees” because they walk around like a GI from the United States would - rudely, without consideration for others or the existing culture, and with a seeming need to flaunt their status as foreigners (and, more nastily, “winners” over the Japanese.) I talk more about the origins of the Japanese delinquent subculture in the Bakugo presentation, but the subculture’s origin comes down to this: dissatisfaction with the current society and a desire to express individuality born from something that can best be described as Western envy.

In appearance and attitude, Bakugo is also very obviously a Japanese delinquent boy, though he doesn’t use the same iconography of national pride. For the most part, neither do Crimson Riot or Kirishima. There’s a reason for that.

Interestingly, Bakugo lacks these visual markers of the “classic” delinquent look while Kirishima embraces some of them (the color red, the dyed hair with its wild styling, and the modern Japanese flag.) Instead, it seems Bakugo’s chosen delinquent visual identity markers are taken exclusively from the filter of shonen anime delinquents rather than the real world subculture! Their differing attempts to separate the things they like from its historic baggage is fascinating to me, personally. 

Bakugo’s outlook and personal presentation leans more towards a fictionalized version of the delinquent than Kirishima and his “manly” mentor’s, but the connection between their masculine presentations and implied personal conducts – or the fact that an underlying code of conduct is central to both identities – is still present.

If you read the article on delinquents I linked, you might notice that it emphasizes that a sense of community and closeness is a probable reason for the delinquent subculture’s enduring existence simultaneous to its rebellious and individualistic slant.

Kirishima and Bakugo are good representations of those two seemingly opposite poles, no? Kirishima focuses on creating a sense of community with himself as the unifying factor while Bakugo initially seeks to separate himself through his individuality.

The Yakuza framing of chivalry is not exactly the same as bushido, but rather the idea of “acting chivalrously” through what they refer to as ninkyodo, or the “way of humanity.” There’s still influence from and elements of bushido in this, however.

If you’re reading this, you’re probably a weeb, so you have likely heard of Way of the Househusband/Goshufukudo. The series’ tagline, “housework without honor or humanity!” is a play on the main character’s status as an ex-Yakuza because he left the Yakuza - or strayed from his ninkyodo/path of humanity - to be a househusband. It’s also a play on the Battles Without Honor or Humanity movies revolving around the same sentiment – except without the househusbandry part, of course.

(Also, the Yakuza created a recruitment website called ninkyodo. Considering the bigger discussion of social unrest and subdued envelope-pushing inherent in this manga, this wacky little blog post is worth a look since it pivots around the Japanese mob being upset with the government’s social programs.)

Delinquent codes draw from the Jingi, or Yakuza code and ninkyodo, which draws from bushido. You know what else draws from bushido? Most forms of contemporary and historic Japanese government.

Bushido has seven core values: gi (justice), yu (courage), jin (benevolence or another word for humanity - and yes, this is the same character as the “Jin” in Twice’s given name, Jin Bubaigawara), rei (gratitude - and no, this is not the same character as Rei Todoroki’s given name but it sounds the same), makoto (sincerity), meiyo (honor), and chugi (loyalty).

Why is this important? Because there is one VERY big difference between Kirishima’s presentation and aesthetic and that of Crimson Riot and Bakugo’s, and it also involves bushido and its masculine, militaristic associations.

In addition to Crimson Riot and delinquent culture, Kirishima blatantly includes kouha as one of his inspirations. Bakugo does not, and it is unclear if Crimson Riot pays attention to them specifically.

What Are Kouha?

Kouha are, as Kirishima’s middle school classmates might say, “old school”. They’re even more old school than delinquents (or Crimson Riot), and they are also deeply nationalist. Kouha were a cultural phenomenon born from the student populations of Japanese military schools (the establishment of the Japanese Imperial Army is considered the first formal step of Japan’s westernization, by the way!) during the Meiji era. They held specific beliefs about male supremacy, masculinity, and national pride. To kouha, these concepts were inseparable from one another. They, and their resulting legacy as soldiers and Navy members in subsequent wars, are the main reason that quasi-nationalist or outright nationalist symbolism is so thoroughly entrenched in Japanese presentations of hypermasculinity even in the modern day.

Basically, kouha = Japanese Nationalists. This is an simplification, but you can read this entire Wikipedia article if you want a better picture of what I mean or need a starting point for your own research.

But don’t freak out! Kirishima’s admiration of kouha is, mostly, for the sake of a pun.

Horikoshi lists one of Kirishima’s favorite things as kouha (called “manly men” or “just manly things” in the most commonly circulated English versions), which means, more or less, “hard school”. It’s a pun on Kirishima’s hardening quirk. However, it also refers to Kirishima’s penchant for historically manly things and hypermasculine presentation.

Kirishima’s “Manly Look” and Japanese Identity

So, to review: Kirishima’s Crimson Riot-inspired philosophy and aesthetic is drawn from delinquent culture, which is a subculture that takes its cues from bushido –  literally “warrior way” but sometimes called “samurai code” in English – which is in turn associated with Japanese pride and even nationalism. This association is very clear in Kirishima’s aesthetic. Look at his room. The Mount Fuji and ocean wave iconography, his hachimaki (admittedly this is relatively common among modern Japanese students, but it still carries a history), the tacky flames in representation of a “burning soul”…

But you know what he doesn’t use? Red sunbeams. This is really important.

The specific “tackiness” and “kouha look” Kirishima enjoys can definitely be indicative of outright nationalism, but it is also associated with other hypermasculine subcultures that are not necessarily nationalists, including delinquent subcultures (though modern ones don’t often use the sunbeam-laden rising sun flag anymore. Modern delinquents usually stick to the modern Japanese flag as part of their uniforms or flags)

The fact that Kirishima’s “kouha look” does not include the sunbeam-laden Rising Sun flag (which, from the perspective of non-Japanese, is associated internationally with war crimes and, for related reasons, the Japanese Navy. Consider it a Japanese swastika—not to be confused with the Japanese manji, which is actually a totally different thing) or red sunbeam motif. This could be because My Hero Academia is set 200 years in the future and the rising sun imagery has fallen out of public memory. But personally, I think it is more likely that Horikoshi (and therefore Kirishima) wants to signal that Kirishima doesn’t hold the same beliefs as kouha and Japanese nationalists.

Even so, Kirishima’s “look” still suggests kouha and still associates his masculinity with his national identity.

This isn’t a perfect one-to-one localization, but, for us in the West, we can sort of think of it like this: the difference between Kirishima and a neo-nationalist is not unlike the difference between guys who authentically really like Viking iconography and neo-Nazis who appropriate Nordic iconography for their beliefs. It’s just that Kirishima seems to be reclaiming these symbols in reverse. (It’s probably a really good thing Mina knows Kirishima from his time before UA, or else she might have given him a way more intense and judgemental side-eye over what’s in his room.)

I suppose if one really wanted to, one could use everything I’ve written as an argument to say, “If you like Kirishima, you fell for the Japanese militarism and neo-nationalism apologist ploy”, but I don’t think portraying him as an apologist was the intent. I choose to see this as a shonen comic about superheroes and connecting the past with the present in pursuit of a better future because that’s all I think it is trying to be.

Again: Kirishima and Crimson Riot’s “manliness” philosophy departs from that of the kouha, Japanese nationalists (and neo-nationalists) because it is inclusive. The use of elements of their aesthetic preserves Kirishima’s personal pride as a Japanese guy - specifically as a “masculine” man - while his take on “manliness” is modern and geared towards celebrating the intrinsic goodness of humanity that isn’t defined by gender, sex, skin color, or even nationality, really, except as it applies as it being a thing for each individual to celebrate about themselves.

There’s other stuff kouha did and didn’t do that Kirishima doesn’t seem concerned about, either.

As I’ve said, modern Japanese sociopolitical (and masculine) identity is strongly associated with bushido. Bushido and kouha, particularly during the Meiji era and Russo-Japanese war (y’all ever read or watched Golden Kamuy?), is consequently associated with the Japanese Navy and nanshoku (THIS WIKIPEDIA ARTICLE IS MILDLY NSFW), or the practice of male-male relationships ranging from ritual pederasty to what one could interpret as “just plain gay” by modern western standards.

Whenever the Eastern or Western fandom discusses the possibility of Kirishima being gay-coded, this association between his kouha aesthetic and nanshoku is almost always at the heart of it. Well, that, and Kirishima’s dogged telegraphing of how much he’s into the kouha aesthetic and other “manly” things. To the modern Japanese, a high degree of overblown hypermasculine presentation and speech can come across as performative overcompensating.

However, there’s one big detail that’s usually missing from these discussions in fandom: generally, the display of hyper-masculinity that is associated with performative overcompensating from closeted gay men includes constantly talking about how much heterosexual intercourse they have (which, according to them, is a whole lot) and how much they love women. Carnally. Sometimes they may even hit on women to an absurd and almost cartoonish degree – but usually only performatively in front of others or to try and fool (or repulse) the woman on the receiving end! The goal of a closeted gay person telegraphing heterosexual stereotypes to such an extreme degree is to either:

1. fool other people into thinking that they are not gay (which is often not very successful)

or

2. Keep themselves in denial by playing the part of an ultra-straight dude.

So, if I am using hypersexualized hetero behavior as the main parameter for how gay-coded a character is, I could argue that Mineta is more gay-coded than Kirishima is. He’s not, but I could make the argument.

But why would a gay person feel the need to do either of these things? Oof. Ain’t that the question. Masculine fragility has different nuances between cultures, but it isn’t exclusive to English-speaking countries. Modern Japan (read: Meiji era to post-World War II Japan that did its damnedest to Westernize as rapidly as possible) is relatively homophobic and views homosexuality as, well, “unmanly”. You can read more about that in the kouha and nanshoku Wikipedia articles I’ve linked. That’s the power of comphet!

That said, I don’t think Kirishima is gay-coded based on his affinity for manly stuff. He’s not using it to compensate for his sexuality. If anything, at his lowest, he used his “kouha-manly” presentation to compensate for his self-perceived lack of heroic and “manly” spirit. True heroism is what defines Kirishima and Crimson Riot’s perception of “manliness”, not sexuality. In fact, that’s the core of why their ideology is so progressive and why it flies in the face of its kouha-presenting packaging.

I mean, Kirishima could have any sexuality out there, but I don’t think his “kouha-manly” look is meant to be indicative of it, whatever it is.

Mina Ashido: A Portrayal of Power in Modern Japan

Mina is a major foil to Kirishima, so this writeup would be incomplete if I didn’t talk about her. If Kirishima is the “manly” Japan of a bygone era questioning how he can be relevant, Mina is “effeminate” modern-day, westernized Japan. Also, Kirishima’s key color is red. Hot damn, that’s flashy! It’s also the color of the sun on the Japanese flag! How fitting that Mina is represented by pink, or “light red”.

Simplifying the characters of Mina and Kirishima primarily by gender categories like that is a little more charged than I would prefer, but let me explain my logic.

During Japan’s occupation by the Allies after World War II, women gained, among other things, the right to vote. To quote Wikipedia directly: “It has been argued that the granting of rights to women played an important role in the radical shift Japan underwent from a war nation to a democratized and demilitarized country.”

They also were no longer bound exclusively to the home as wives and mothers, but could also take employment. Got it? Good. While I needed to explain this to set the stage for the stark difference in gender politics between the kouha’s heyday and womens’ standing after World War II, this is only loosely related to Mina and her portrayal.

Much like Kirishima, the biggest tells are evident in Mina’s look. In simple terms, traditional Japanese femininity isn’t flashy, isn’t westernized, and women don’t take the lead. Mina is flashy, westernized, and she does lead. In the manga, this is framed as a positive by her peers and something Kirishima admires and envies. (I have no idea how the older generation feels about it. We don’t know much about Mina’s personal life, unfortunately.)

Mina is a very modern girl. She stands out because of her natural appearance, but she also dresses ostentatiously whenever she isn’t wearing her high school uniform. Her look favors an updated spin on the gyaru subculture. In fact, while part of her natural appearance rather than intentional choice, I could argue that Mina’s startlingly black eyes and “unusual” skin is meant to indicate the yamanba (spinoff from ganguro) fashion subculture, but I’m not sure I am meant to go that far. Regardless of the specifics, everything about her appearance implies the largest commonality between most modern young Japanese women and every female-specific fashion subcultures (including lolita or kogal – Toga is a kogal): rejection of traditional gender roles and presentation.

I’m gonna sum up Kirishima’s own personal plot and backstory for the sake of reference.

Kirishima is a guy with a hardening quirk. It’s not flashy or particularly suited for offense or rescue, and he’s self-conscious about how “worthy” he is to be a hero not just because of his lackluster power, but because, in the past, he’s avoided stepping in situations where, if he were a true Hero, he would have stepped in and offered support without thinking about it!

Sound familiar?

Instead, his childhood friend (that he secretly admires very much but also feels very insecure around) stepped in to be capital-H heroic while he stood and gaped uselessly! And what’s worse? She is a GIRL. A WESTERNIZED GIRL did what he couldn’t do. So, obviously, if he can’t be more heroic and “manly” than a GIRL, he isn’t manly at all. And he’s scared of that.

Sound familiar?!

In high school, Kirishima puts on an outgoing persona (complete with a new hairstyle) inspired by his childhood hero (and also, lowkey, the childhood friend with which he associates the same kind of true heroism) to cover for his insecurities!

SOUND FAMILIAR?!

But that’s enough about how Kirishima and Mina’s story parallels Bakugo and Deku’s for now. Allow me to throw the other parallel in your face - the one between Mina and Kirishima and Japan and the US’s policy changes after WWII.

Mina, the modern, westernized Japanese girl, was first to act when “foreign power with old loyalty” Gigantomachia threatened their classmates. She solved the confrontation – and solved other confrontations with her peers – nonviolently. Meanwhile, kouha-aligned (militaristic and masculine Japan) Kirishima was not only unable to act (aka did not have any military influence), but felt completely useless and superfluous in both of these instances. (But later, when Gigantomachia re-emerges in a context that Mina cannot possibly solve on civil terms or with misdirection, Kirishima is able to defend her and do what she can’t. Even later, Mina learns the best ways to kick someone’s ass with her acid. She acts as the sword - or perhaps more precisely, the spear - to Kirishima’s shield.

If you didn’t know, the “sword and shield” analogy, or more commonly, “spear and shield” analogy is, or, at least, was, used to describe the US and Japan’s relationship after WWII. Whenever Kirishima talks about being the “ultimate shield” or “ultimate spear”, this means something.)

So, yes. This story is about the modern and traditional; the feminine and the masculine; the West and East. Just like Bakugo and Deku.

There exists a complicated relationship between national shame over losing the war, shame from Japan’s own war crimes, shame in Japan’s continued political ineffectiveness without a strong established military, and outright Japanese envy of the West for not only winning the war but epitomizing prosperity and modernity (or appearing to do so, at least.) I really don’t have the background to talk about this in-depth or respectfully. The point is that overt pride in the Japanese identity is a complicated issue, but particularly as it reflects in expressed Japanese masculinity. For Kirishima, his early relationship with Mina and the envy he feels towards her is a succinct crystallization of these feelings in allegory form.

In the Bakugo presentation, I mentioned that the shonen genre was “born” after World War II and the art form still incorporates postwar baggage. This includes the aftermath of the nation reeling from its lack of military power after the war. I’ve already drawn a clear line between Japanese military might and its masculinity, so I don’t feel I need to elaborate much about why I make this next statement: a significant swath of the Japanese felt the loss of military power emasculated the country (which, as discussed through Mina, made it “effeminate”. Or, depending on the perspective, it “infantilized” the country. This introductory course examining shojo manga and identity touches on the infantilization of Japan through media exports and branding if you’d like to read another perspective using this terminology.)

I feel I should mention that Japan’s current crisis regarding declining birth rates is often associated with the lack of “properly masculine” men and the growing ability of modern Japanese women to put off or refuse marriage.The first observational piece about male subgroups discusses how masculine identity and neo-nationalism seem to be closely associated or even conflated for one another by the individuals in the neo-nationalist subgroup, but also alludes to the fact that a lack of clearly defined masculinity is being treated as a national crisis since it is seen as a prohibitive factor for Japan’s current generation to start families. To that end, Prime Minister Shinso Abe pushed for a variety of measures to encourage people to have kids.

In fact, Shinso Abe has achieved meme status in international otaku circles because whenever an anime or manga encourages or portrays sex for the purpose of procreation and raising a family as expected and singularly correct, the community wonders if it’s anime propaganda aimed at encouraging Japanese viewers to go have kids. This, combined with the fact that Shueisha/Shonen Jump upholds certain beliefs and gender/sexuality power dynamics in their company policy that is reflected in their published titles, will be important later in this series of presentations. For now, it’s just something to think about.

In shonen manga, including this one, the focus on men/growing mens’ identity (and the Japanese-specific flavor of masculinity) in a modern and changing world comes up a lot. While not directly related to Kirishima’s chosen counterculture influences, here’s a link to download an observational piece describing three notable cishet male Japanese subgroups struggling to define (or redefine) their own masculinity and identity: herbivorous men (kind of like western hipster metrosexuals), otaku (you know what these are), and Japanese petit-nationalists (basically neo-nationalists. And yes, they share elements from Kirishima’s aesthetic. If this were about Spinner and any heteromorph characters, this particular group would be much more relevant to this discussion.) Here’s another piece focused on “genderless” danshi and masculinity. Both of these pieces discuss the precarious correlation between male identity, community, presentation, and values. That, and I think they’re neat topics – though I do suggest you think critically about what you read in them.

Anyway, let’s get back to talking about this damn manga.

If you ever asked yourself, “How would Bakugo and Deku’s relationship differ if Deku had a quirk?” or, “How would Bakugo and Deku’s relationship differ if one of them was a girl?”, here’s your answer: it would be very similar to the relationship between Kirishima and Mina. Most of the relationships between pairs or sets of characters is meant to reflect off of the relationship between Bakugo and Deku in some way as either a compare/contrast exercise or to show how different things could be if fate had conspired to make one or two small differences in their lives.

This is thematically crucial to understand for almost every moment in the story.

Reflections of Kirishima’s Feelings of Inadequacy and Powerlessness

Kirishima and Bakugo have a lot in common. It’s not terribly surprising they became friends even when Bakugo was at his worst, since Kirishima could likely relate to where he was coming from and how he was feeling on some level.

If you thought Mina being a girl was inconsequential to Kirishima’s feelings of inadequacy, think again. Luckily for everyone, Kirishima isn’t as much of a sensitive, fragile, and dramatic bitch as Bakugo about his insecurities.

Kirishima also hadn’t been explicitly stewing on them as they applied to one specific person for roughly 11 years of his life, either, so. There’s that.

Bakugo’s relationship with Kirishima is an introductory course for him on how to have a positive relationship with Deku. For Kirishima, Bakugo is a proxy for relating to and helping the person in his life that he admires most: Mina.

But the Kirishima-Bakugo parallel isn’t the only parallel we need to draw.

Arguably, Kirishima shares more similarities with Deku than Bakugo (but, of course, Deku and Bakugo are also very similar, too.) Kirishima is not confident in himself, mimics his idol very closely, is very concerned with upholding the status quo (through interpersonal harmony), got into UA through his effort rather than because he has a well-suited quirk, is quick to act “heroically” and put others before himself, is quick to throw himself into danger on others’ behalf (he’s got a hardening quirk, so unlike Deku he doesn’t mangle himself repeatedly with these stunts), and has an I-won’t-admit-it-for-most-of-the-series-but-I-will-broadcast-it-in-other-ways object of admiration in his childhood friend Mina.

Also, Kirishima feels woefully inadequate when compared to Mina because, in his eyes, she already has the appearance of a hero (and professional Hero.)

Kirishima’s outgoing attitude is a product of him pushing himself to be more like Mina in charisma and approachability. The horns of his hair are also inspired by her, too. While both of these things can be framed as parallels to Bakugo’s admiration of Deku as I did earlier, they are more on-the-nose for Deku’s penchant for intentionally talking like Bakugo when he wants to psyche himself out and copying all of Bakugo’s moves in order to best harness his quirk. And, of course, when Kirishima and Deku don disguises to go save Bakugo, they choose outfits with exaggerated horns (like Mina) and a Yakuza/delinquent persona (like Bakugo) respectively.

Kirishima seems to be able to “read the room” when it comes to the relationship between Deku and Bakugo - and in both directions. Personally, I am not surprised that he chooses to quietly support both of them when it comes to the other.

But perhaps the more interesting parallel is the one drawn between Bakugo and Mina.

When Mina uncovers Kirishima’s “secret” (he dyed his hair and changed his outward persona to make a good impression as a friendly and outgoing guy with his “high school debut” rather than come off as a shy fanboy), it’s analogous to Deku telling (albeit vaguely) Bakugo about One for All at the beginning of the manga. Both scenes even take place at the start of the school year with cherry blossoms in the background and stuff. Later in the series, after Bakugo figures out the full secret of OfA (much like Mina figures out that Kirishima wants to be popular), he even explicitly says he’ll keep Deku’s secret.

Mina and Bakugo are both described as “amazing” and both imply significant discomfort over the generalized compliment. It’s a huge expectation to carry.

Mina’s “Alien Queen” is denied as a Hero name just as Bakugo’s “King Explosion Murder”. Huh. Funny, that.

Kirishima and Mina are constantly improving using the other as inspiration, just as Deku and Bakugo do. They learn from other sources, too, of course, but these two sets of characters have an established feedback loop.

While Bakugo doesn’t struggle academically like Mina, especially during the training camp, his personal failures, many of which are social, are often broadcast on television. Both of them look like idiots in front of their respective foils.

Also, Bakugo and Mina both kicked ass at the school festival - Mina with the dancing and Bakugo on the drums. Deku and Kirishima were, you know, support. Extras.

During the festival, Mina and Bakugo were also both demanding taskmasters - Mina expected the best of her dance crew while Bakugo always had something to say about the pace and technique of his band members. Ha!

When Kirishima saves Mina in their confrontation with Gigantomachia, he does it without regard for his own safety (after initially hesitating and panicking like Deku did for the first part of the sludge villain incident!) Gigantomachia is also, interestingly, a shared past foe of Kirishima and Mina much like the sludge villain is for Bakugo and Deku.

Considering how they parallel one another and how Mina’s Acidman Alma is inspired by Todoroki and Bakugo, I like to think that her win against the sludge villain was an inadvertent moment of revenge on Bakugo’s behalf, even if her character didn’t intend for it to be.

Chapter 383′s initial fan title translation of “A Small Heart” is also interesting, considering how the turn of phrase relates to the figures of speech used for Bakugo’s ego in the manga’s early chapters (inflated heart.) Viz translated it as “Meek Spirits”. A “small heart” seems to indicate cowardice or fear on Mina’s part (or the Sludge villain’s.) Despite Bakugo’s inflated ego (heart), his was also rather small in terms of facing his secret fears of inadequacy and, well, Deku.

The point is, even when Mina and Bakugo’s hearts were “small”, they saved Kirishima and Deku respectively.

Someone who knows more about Japanese could say more on this, as well as share more disambiguation between whether the English or Japanese connotations of the word “heart” are at play here. There’s some discussion about that in the Uraraka-Bakugo-Toga presentation.

For all her confidence, Mina gets scared and nervous, too. But she doesn’t give up!

Mina gets it done!

Will Bakugo and Deku accomplish what Mina and Kirishima have? I dunno. But even so,

Kirishima rocks on his own and alongside Mina!

[teaveetamer]

I'm sorry, Raxis has a history of sporking fic? He has a TVTROPES page about it?

Then literally, aside from defending his saintly waifu.png's delicate honour, grounds - moral or otherwise - does he have to stand on? He knows what the purpose of sporking is, in theory. He should know that sometimes it's just about discussing a fic, thematically, in depth, to see what it says or how it fails to say them, instead of just plain mockery.

Or maybe it's that he's only ever sporked a fic to insult or send harassment towards the 'cringe' author, so he's unable to comprehend that anyone else might do it for any other reason.

I'm sure Raxis thinks he's the main character and all, but even this is way more transparently hypocritical than usual.

YEEEEEEEEEEP. He even wrote his own little character profile on the Das Sporking TV tropes page. Which was a community primarily geared toward mocking Twilight and Fifty Shades originally, so you might not be off about the "sporked fic just to insult or send harassment towards the 'cringe author'".

Also like here's the thing. He's gonna claim it was a long time ago, and that's true, but he's 35. He was also editing the Das Sporking TV tropes page back in 2013, 2014, and 2015, which means he was at least 24 or 25 and active in these communities. The earliest he could have possibly joined up is 2009, when he was like 21, given this entry:

Where Raxis writes that his first spork/intended spork was the Sword Art Online light novel, which was released in 2009 in Japan and 2014 in America?

Also he's still editing the pages. He only marked himself down as "retired" last month when people started calling him out for being a hypocrite for trying to shit talk BWIIDT when he was an active sporker himself.

Also you're? Still doing it? You're LITERALLY sporking a fic right now. YOU CALL IT A SPORK. Like yes if this was just some dumbass shit he did as a teen or even a twenty-something then I wouldn't bother bringing it up, but he's still doing it. So uh yeah, it's still relevant? Especially when you spend most of your fucking Reyna sporks whining about what a big ol meaaaaaaaaaaaaanie BWIIDT is for... pointing out racism and sexism.

Like you, a cishet white man, spent your 20's when you were a grown ass man, in a community apparently known for shitting on teenage girls who like Twilight and you appear to have done no reflection or growth on that.

I did cringe and offensive and ignorant shit ten years ago too (granted I was an actual teenager ten years ago). Like, I definitely had some weird hangup about Demisexuality. Thank GOD I don't think I ever posted any of it publicly. And now ten years later I'm not such an ignorant fuckwad and I don't think or say those things anymore. You know what I don't do? Claim to have learned from and regret my mistakes, continue to post demi-phobic shit all over my social media accounts, and then get mad at people for calling out my hypocrisy because "you're bringing up stuff I did ten years ago!"

It was ten years ago but shit ain't changed, so why wouldn't your past behavior still be relevant? Especially since you were old enough to know better then, and you're sure as shit old enough to know better now.

Also I just want to point out the irony of Raxis breaking THE FIRST RULE of the Das Sporking wiki with his sporks

Sooo you had no idea linking to a fic directly could possibly cause harassment, huh? That was just a big oopsie on your part?

He doesn't give a shit about Reyna's fic. He just views it as a way to dunk on the "Edelcrits" and specifically BWIIDT, which is why he CONSTANTLY brings up BWIIDT in his posts about Reyna (I've seen a few more snippets). Like he genuinely thinks it hurts our feelings when he mocks a fic none of us had ever even fucking heard of before. It doesn't, it just makes him look like a massive fucking tool.

And like I pointed out in this post, BWIIDT started talking about Cap's fic because people were out here shoving it down fandoms' throat and insisting it was "essential" to understand canon. Like it was getting recc'd to Joe fucking Zieja, and it has SO MANY problematic elements. Racism, sexism, homophobia, etc. I won't rehash them all.

What even are Raxy's criticisms of Reyna's fic, other than "it's cringe", "I don't like how she writes Edelgard", and "BWIIDT hurt my feelings by talking about a fic I like"? And again, what the fuck does this random fic author have to do with anything BWIIDT has done? If your issue is with BWIIDT then why do you insist on dragging a random person in for no fucking reason?

[drysaladandketchup]

Writing Meme

Tagged by my dear @irrelevanttous <3

RULES: go to your published works on AO3 and list the first fic you ever published there, the last fic you published, any fic that you wrote for a fandom/ship only once, your favorite fic you wrote in the fandom/ship that has the most works, the fic you wish more people read, the fic you agonized over the most, the fic that sprang fully formed from your mind without any effort, and a work you are proud of—for whatever reason

first fic you ever published on Ao3: Spirit of Champions, for the Supernatural/Destiel fandom. I don't even know why I'm linking the fic, it was ten years ago I'd like to think my writing has improved a lot since then so... maybe don't read it lol. I actually have another fic that says it was posted on the same date but I think that's because I moved them both over from livejournal at the same time, so whatever

last fic you published: Acts of Devotion for the Hockey/Mattdrai fandom. Much prouder of this fic haha, though I was still getting a feel for hockey and these guys during it's construction. It hopefully won't be my last mattdrai fic though. Got a few ideas and WIPs sitting in my drafts

a fic you wrote for a fandom/ship only once: I don't think I've ever written just one fic for a fandom. Though I certainly have many abandoned WIP's and a few unpublished fics from days gone by. Also due to a lack of ideas or energy, I often end up publishing nothing for a fandom, despite my love for it. But I'll go with the fandom I only published two fics for. After Life's Fitful Fever, He Sleeps Well for The Terror. It's actually a platonic ship (if that counts? Depends on your definition of 'ship' I suppose), but it's still one I'm quite fond of overall

favorite fic you wrote in the fandom/ship with the most works: well I already mentioned Supernatural, so that would be the obvious answer lol. But I already did that, so I'm going to go with a fic from the next biggest fandom I've published for. Which I would say is String Theory for Final Fantasy XV. The only FF game I've ever played, but I had a grand old time, made a lot of friends and had a lot of growth in that community

fic you wish more people read: Can I say any of my fics from the Dunkirk fandom? No? Boo. It's a tiny fandom so I don't expect a tonne of interaction haha. But it is the fandom I've written the most for. Ideas just kept on coming (probably because I love history and angst). So I'd say... Where You Were, Where You're Needed. My first for the fandom, and one I still love dearly

fic you agonized over the most: Skybound, for Dunkirk. It's the only novel-length fic I've written, and it took me two years. I also didn't publish it until it was completely finished, edited, re-drafted, and remodelled within an inch of it's life so... yeah that one. Plus all the history research and story planning that went into it was a lot more than I usually do. It was fun, I'm glad I finished it, but fuck I don't know how people write novels regularly. Stephen King tell me your secret

fic that sprang fully formed from your mind without any effort: For The Glory, for the Hockey/Mattdrai fandom. Maybe the fastest I've written anything. Basically wrote it from start to finish within a couple hours, not including food and sleep. Not a monumental fic, no, but for someone with chronic fatigue and adhd... astounding. It was very much a result of conversations with M. and her determination to drag me into hockey and mattdrai. Successfully, clearly haha

work you are proud of: I'm going to say Skybound again. Small fandom, but a huge fic for me. One I could probably turn into an original piece with minimal finagling if I wanted. I would also like to think one could enjoy the fic without having seen Dunkirk. That being said, now that it's been over a year a half since I finished it, I'm already looking at it thinking 'I could have written this differently. I could have removed this or tweaked that.' Editor hell. But I'm leaving it as is, using it as a benchmark for my (hopefully) continued improvement as a writer. I think I improved over the course of writing it, even. A lot changed from inception to publication. But I'm no less proud of it, as a written work or as a story. I did what I wanted, and I wrote the exact story I wanted to read. So I'm happy :)

Thank you for the tag, M.! <3

[planets-and-prose]

Meet My OC's: Deborah

Picrew linked here, and as always, more info under the cut!

Physical Description: Deborah is about 5'2" and very pale. She has auburn hair that's kind of in a shaggy, overgrown bob because she cut off her super long hair by herself and it didn't turn out AMAZING but she doesn't care that much anyway so it lives. She wears kind of bulky clothes, slowly leaning a little more butch but "acceptably" so, jeans and flannels vibes. Green eyes, wears glasses, and has hearing aids because she has quite a bit of hearing loss (since she was young). Is more heavyset, definitely the least athletic type build out of all of them.

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Summary: As many of those who've attended one know, college campuses are some sort of insular world of their own. They're tiny communities, full of burnout, existential crisis...and, well, in the case of a mid-sized private college known for its environmental studies and biology programs, there are...things beyond human understanding.

In a series of short stories, follow five individuals in various stages of their own journeys as they band together to keep their community safe from any forces that choose to harm it, and attempt to better understand this new world that they've been thrust into. And...also, try to maybe not die in the process. That's important too.

Genre: NA...Urban Fantasy

Themes: Found Family (if I ever don't put that, please assume I've been replaced), the American college system, stages of life, personal growth, marginalization, lgbt+ relationships, community.

General Triggers: mentions of discrimination, probable violence, definite body horror (transformations specifically), general trauma, language, more will be added as discovered and all excerpts will be tagged appropriately.

Characters:

Dr. Semira Adams, a sweet 46 year old Southern environmental studies professor/monster hunter specializing in the...unique biological features of the surrounding forest and how it's shifting to adapt to them.

Briar Rackham, a 28 year old TA and graduate student for Dr. Adams. They're a model grad student--straight A's, volunteering with nature camps for kids in the nearby cities, working on an excellent dissertation, LGBTQ+ rights advocate...and a recently turned werewolf.

Also: Worldbuilding re: werewolves!

Achaemenes (Kay),a 24 year old super-super-super senior in pre-med who's delaying his studies as long as humanly possible. Because graduation means there's no excuse to keep away from his hometown, a tiny rural community that's a well-hidden cult, half-populated by fae.

Also: Worldbuilding re: fey!

Dawn Solace, a...well, her body is 21 but her actual age is 39. So let's go with 39-year-old vampire who continues to work with music and theater at this college that she now calls her home.

Also: Worldbuilding re: vampires!

Masumi Yoshida,a 26-year-old whose whole life is a lie. According to her family, she's working on two very intense double majors and holding down an excellent internship on the side. In reality, she works at the chain burger joint on campus, telling her coworkers that she had to drop out due to a family tragedy and is just saving to enroll next semester when that's the last thing on her mind.

Deborah McCaen,a 20 year old junior, dual majoring in history and anthropology, with a focus on oral tradition and mythology. After being homeschooled her whole life, she moved away to college and found a love in understanding the "demonic creatures" told of in the fantasy books she wasn't allowed to read as a child.

Writing:

To be added as more is posted!

#continuing ed sots#wip intro#new wip#paranormal#supernatural#supernatural elements#werewolves#no vampires yet#yet#fey#fae#urban fantasy#fantasy#continuing ed: sots… See all

planets-and-prose

Last Line Tag

I was tagged by @the-down-upside-finch (their post is here)! So here this is! :)

Half of [Briar] wanted to help Dr. Adams and make sure their favorite professor, basically their surrogate mom, made it back safe, and the other half wanted to run home, go back to bed, and hope this was all an awful, fucked-up dream.

No tags for now, basically an open tag, bc I have like two more of these that I'll do throughout the evening! :)

#tag game#continuing ed sots#thank you for the tag!!#oc: briar

planets-and-prose

Meet My OC's: Dr. Semira Adams

Full Name: Semira Naomi Adams (Maiden Name Baker)

Age: 46

Gender: Cis Female

Sexuality: Heterosexual (yes I know, I finally made a straight OC)

Occupation: Tenured wildlife biology professor/researcher by day, monster hunter by night.

#oc: semira#oc: dr adams#ya bitch cannot decide on a tag#continuing ed sots#continuing education#meet my ocs#oc questions… See all

planets-and-prose

Continuing Education: Vampires

Basic Info: Vampires are undead creatures who are mostly human, but whose bodies function essentially like someone in a coma’s would. They can transmit vampirism to other individuals as well.

Creation: Vampires are made by one vampire sharing blood with another. In rare, occasional cases, saliva can do it, but this has only been recorded in highly immunocompromised or immunosuppressed individuals. For this to work, saliva would have to enter the bloodstream directly during a bite.

#continuing ed sots#my worldbuilding#worldbuilding#my ocs

planets-and-prose

Meet My OC's: Deborah

Full Name: Deborah Esther McCaen

Age: 20

Gender: Female. But said with all the confidence of that person raised super sheltered who just learned about gender being a spectrum. (Spoiler: a they will sneak into the pronoun list at some point in this story. Not at all based on real experiences--)

Sexuality: Straight. But, again, said with the confidence level of someone who has never understood what sexual attraction is much less how it might apply to someone of the same gender. (Spoiler: this too will change lmao)

Occupation: Student, studying a fun little history/anthropology double major, focusing on oral tradition and myths. And who maybe reads a bit too much about cryptids.

Physical Description: Deborah is about 5'2" and very pale. She has auburn hair that's kind of in a shaggy, overgrown bob because she cut off her super long hair by herself and it didn't turn out AMAZING but she doesn't care that much anyway so it lives. She wears kind of bulky clothes, slowly leaning a little more butch but "acceptably" so, jeans and flannels vibes. Green eyes, wears glasses, and has hearing aids because she has quite a bit of hearing loss (since she was young). Is more heavyset, definitely the least athletic type build out of all of them.

Personality: Deborah makes the word "awkward" seem put together and smooth. She was homeschooled and oh boy it shows. She does not know about most social norms and was INCREDIBLY sheltered from anyone outside her church, so like...making friends? Normal conversation? Not really. She also definitely has a touch of the 'tism, and that manifests in both struggles reading social cues and not quite realizing that when people ask "what type of stuff do you like?" that a 30 minute rant about Mothman is not perhaps the most socially acceptable response. But she takes promises and bonds seriously, a stayover from the religion she was raised in, and is loyal to a fault to the people who give her time of day.

Other Important Stuff: My lovely little disclaimer here. I don't mean any disrespect to the way that I'm portraying the LDS faith, I'm just portraying some experiences that people who had adverse experiences with the church might have had, particularly as a queer person. I know a great number of individuals who find a lot of comfort in the church, but as someone who did not, I want to tell that story too.

[sflow-er]

Hi.

You can call me Sflow (not comfortable divulging my gender). Awkward millennial from the Nordics, self-employed translator, massive geek, still an early 2000s emo kid at heart.

I’m mainly here for the latest in my very long line of fixations: Young Royals. I’ve been in the fandom since July 2021 but only came out of lurking here in the early months of 2022. I still expect to keep blogging about YR now that canon has ended, but there will also be some posts about other media I'm interested in, various ace stuff, my native country’s politics, etc. I will continue to tag those posts ‘not yr’ for your convenience!

One reason I have such love for YR is that it reignited my creative spark: I'm Sflow on ao3 now. Fic descriptions and links are also available on a separate master list page (only works on desktop).

My magnum opus is an S1-compliant longfic called Other people’s secrets. It's an outsider POV of Wilmon, a personal growth journey for Henry, and an ace/allo romance between him and Walter. I'm proud to say the ship name Walty was coined by one of the readers!

(Description post with a few reader reblogs here, first chapter here.)

I've written a few shorter fics as well; they are alloace Henry fics in line with my headcanon of him. At present, I am reworking my Walter-focused prequel (WIP) in the main series while also writing an S3-compliant character study of an aged-up aroace Henry.

Oh, and I have also written a pre-canon character study on August. It’s called Årnäs, February 2016 and explores his upbringing and parental relationships (i.e. how he got so messed up).

---

My blog is of course safe for all LGBTQIA+ people. I’m grey ace with demi tendencies; romantic orientation unlabelled/fluid since I accepted my asexuality and Realised Some Stuff about my history of attraction. Some kind of multiromantic I guess.

Thank you for reading! 💜

---

Links to a few longer pieces of YR/fandom meta under the cut.

The posts marked in purple are obsolete after S3.

About Henry and Walter’s canon backgrounds (updated with Walter's last name!)

Some notes on the aristocracy in Sweden

Some thoughts on the hierarchy at Hillerska

About August’s upbringing, worldview and parents

Team "Let Wille Be Fully Himself And Parliament Decide What's Next"

YR S3 speculation: a layperson’s take on the criminal justice side

On writing niche YR fic and factors that affect the popularity of a fic

[gale-gentlepenguin]

ML Analysis: The Miraculous. Marvelous or Ridiculous.

So I have been asked to make an analysis on the well known Magical Jewelry of the show. The miraculous. (No I will not be talking about the Shanghai special magical gems, I won't even be mentioning anything revealed after the NY special. This is solely knowledge on season 3 and prior.)

This will be a VERY long post in which I will be discussing the merits and demerits of the magical items in question.

Now for this analysis I will be doing my best to solely focus on the miraculous themselves, this is not an analysis on the Guardians or other miraculous holders. This is about the magical gems. I will be giving some background information on certain things. But I am going to focus on the miraculous.

I think in order to organize this post I will be splitting it up as follows.

A Miraculous Lore

Kwami: Personal Pals or Pain in the Butt

Potential and Drawbacks

Power Balance: The delicate dance

Final thoughts

So lets get to it

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A Miraculous Lore

To briefly explain, the 'Miraculous' are magical jewelry created by a powerful mage which allows the powers of Kwami to be harnessed and controlled by anyone who wields it and uses it to transform.

Now when it comes to magical items, its important that these items have sort of connection to the fictional world they are in. This connection acts as a means of world building. Now there are 3 main factors to keep in mind when connecting the mystical item of power to the world itself, the history, mystery, and Impact on the present. In this section I will be talking about how the miraculous are addressed in the series, from their historical significance as well as their mysterious powers that are yet to be truly revealed.

Now history is the talk of the events of the past, and in the world of miraculous ladybug, the miraculous have a rather interesting connection to world events. In the show, we learn that the miraculous were active in ancient china, in Egypt, in greek mythology (which makes the greek myths more of history) and even events as recent as the American revolution were impacted by the miraculous. Now these reveals are information provided in the show itself, there are also confirmations from the writers regarding other points in history where the miraculous were active, such as when Joan of Arc was fighting in the 100 year war. Now this aspect works well with the second trait of world building, mystery, but it also leaves a lot of gaps for the viewer, which is where the next part of the history connection comes in, the order of the guardians. The guardians of the miraculous work as the connecting point, giving the viewer the explanation on how the miraculous became a part of human history. The guardians connection lays the ground work for the miraculous lore as it allows us to understand that an ancient order dedicated to protecting the miraculous knew when to step in and help history along. Overall, the aspect of history when connected to the miraculous seems to work well for the world building, at least so long as we focus on the miraculous themselves.

The mystery is the aspect of the unknown. What exactly are the secrets hidden about the miraculous. Now the part of the mystery is that the purpose of the miraculous and how the link between the god like beings that the Kwami are is still left up in the air. With the comics, we know that the Kwami are each based on an abstract concept like Creation, destruction and so on. We also find out that a wizard made the miraculous... for some reason. The mystery of the miraculous allows for rapid progress and power ups in the story. In the beginning we knew very little of the limitations and potential the miraculous had. We knew, Ladybug and Chat noir had 5 minutes after using their unique power and that the bad man wanted their miraculous for evil. As the mystery unveils, we find out that there are more miraculous, and that using certain miraculous together can allow for god-like power. We also learned about potions, techniques, and other such things that make the miraculous more enigmatic. What is the full potential of the miraculous? What more is there to this mystery? The miraculous brings the more interesting parts of ML to light because we as the viewer are invested in what more these jewelry sets can do.

The impact on the present. As the show's plot revolves around the two heroes that utilize the miraculous, it is easy to see how the miraculous are very crucial to the plot. The main villain wants the magical items because he wants to make his wish, the heroes need the power to fend off his villains that he creates and eventually take the miraculous back from him. Meanwhile the order that protected the miraculous are once again active thanks to Ladybug and Chat noir purifying the akumatized Sentimonster Feast (which had massive impact on the progression of story ).

_____________________________________________________________

Kwami: Personal Pals or Pain in the Butt

Kwamis, best described as divine, spirit-like beings who embody "abstract" concepts. They give certain powers to people with Miraculouses, transforming them into animal-themed super beings. Kwami are the beings that make the Miraculous, well miraculous.

The Kwami have a rather fascinating role in the story as they act as they add character to this relatively cool jewelry piece. It isn't just a magical item, the Kwami are companions to their wielders and need to be judged as such. Now these beings are crucial because they play multiple roles in the show. For this part of the analysis, I will be focusing mainly on the Kwami that have had the most screen time, mainly Tikki, Plagg, Wayzz and Nooru. The other Kwami, while having personalities, do not have permanent owners or have not been out long enough to establish themselves. Now these four Kwami are important because they can be examined if they follow the indicators of a companion or specifically fit the trope known as Mentor Mascot. For this I have created 2 criteria Distinct criteria that these Kwami must meet in order to be considered good companions. These criteria are Cute Confidant and Wiser Advisor.

The Cute Confidant is an aspect that addresses two key components in the mentor mascot companion field. The first is obviously, cuteness. The Kwami must be cute, small and have tiny habits that make you want a plushy of them. In this regard, all of the Kwami pass the test because all of them are tiny and have little habits that make them adorable to the viewer. From Wayzz and his little Match box bed, to Plagg's chaotic cat tendencies, to Tikki's cute little assistant routine, and even Nooru's tiny bits of exposition and concern. The kwami capture cuteness. The second component to this is the Confidant portion. The Kwami must be entities that the wielder wants to tell things to, things that they would not tell anyone else. In short, the Kwami need to be beings that the user can trust whole heartedly. Now Tikki and Wayzz have both shown to be the most obedient confidants in this regard. Both have the best experience keeping secrets and their users trust them completely. Plagg is a bit more chaotic and it is true that Adrien does tell him everything and that he would never spill that info, Plagg has gone behind Adrien's back more times then any of the other swami (like in Sand boy, and in Kwamibuster). Though while not trust breaking, Plagg has caused his partner a bit of trouble (which actually makes him a better mascot, but less a mentor). Nooru is sort of forced to obey Gabriel so while not a willing confidant, he does listen to him monologue a LOT. In short, the Kwami do make for Cute Confidants.

The Wiser Advisor aspect comes into play in one very simple way. How do the Kwami help their wielders outside of their powers. The Advising role of the mascot mentor is truly important as with nearly every single magical girl/ superhero show, the character has an identity to keep secret and sometimes the only one that can be talked to when there is a problem is their mascot mentor. In this department, Tikki is technically the best advice giver as Marinette is suppose to learn the most lessons due to her being the main character, but I think Plagg better exemplifies the personal aspect of the wiser advisor role. Plagg goes out of his way to try and do what he thinks is best for Adrien. Plagg is seen more like the devil on the shoulder by the fandom, but Plagg is acting more like the voice of self worth for Adrien. Plagg is acting with Adrien's interests at heart. If one looks at Syren or Chat Blanc, there are times when Plagg advises AGAINST something and is often right in that regard. Plagg has a larger grasp of knowing when something is wrong more than something is right. The Kwami are still inhuman and can't relate to everything their 'Chosen' goes through, which we see more in the recent season, with Tikki's explaination. In this regard the Kwami learn just as much from the humans as the humans do from them. Though really, Tikki is suppose to be the wiser advisor but the problem comes into play when her answers are... not very helpful. Tikki has shown to either tell the lesson of the day and get ignored or have no idea how to fix a situation. There is no middle ground with her. But in the end the Wiser Advisor role is conveyed by the kwami and that is important.

The Kwami provide a very crucial aspect to the miraculous, it adds a personality to the ancient relic. We want our heroes to protect the miraculous because we want the kwami to be safe and away from evil people like Hawkmoth. The kwami add so much more to this normally typical magical item. Their roles as the cute confidant and the Wiser advisor allows for them to be crucial in the growth of the heroes as they continue down the path of heroism. And while i think the writing for the kwami can fluctuate, I think its fair to conclude that they are personal pals rather than pains in the butt.

_____________________________________________________________.

Potential and Drawbacks

So in this section of the analysis I will be covering the Potential of the Miraculous as well as the drawbacks. Does this potential make sense? Or is it simply another deus ex Machina. As for the drawbacks. Whats the price of utilization? Is their a fee? What are the limits? Do these limits make sense? Are there too many limits or not enough limits? Now let us progress.

As mentioned in the mystery aspect of the miraculous. The Miraculous have Kwami that represent concepts and their power relates to said concept. When we as the viewer are introduced to the Miraculous, we only know that the miraculous have a unique power and that when the ladybug and Cat miraculous are both used can have a power that the villain wants. Now as the seasons pass we see that the specific power that the villain wants is to use the two miraculous to make a wish. This concept alone make the miraculous (or at the very least the ladybug and Cat miraculous) immensely powerful. The potential of having a wish makes the two miraculous priceless. In a way, this reveal shows the max potential that the miraculous are capable of, the ability to shape the world in anyway the user desires. But that is only the case when BOTH the ladybug and Cat miraculous are utilized, what about the other miraculous? What are they capable of alone? Well by themselves, the miraculous are pretty much straightforward. They enhance the abilities of the user to super human levels and then allow the user to utilize the unique power of the miraculous, such as destruction, time travel, etc.

Now in season 2 we learn that there are potions that can be consumed to allow the heroes to traverse different environments, such as the vaccum of space, the ocean, and frozen plains, what this does is allow for the user to have an edge in any environment which makes the miraculous highly adaptable. It is unknown if potions can be stacked on top of one another, but that is debatable on whether or not that would even be useful.

In Season 3, we learn that miraculous can be used together, using unification. This allows the user to use 2 miraculous at the same time. While it is unclear if it improves the already enhanced abilities of the wearer, it is confirmed that they can use the kwami powers involved in the unification. We even see Marinette find a work around to this by using the mouse miraculous to make copies of herself and then use 4 different powers! Showing that there is a way to work around the two person ability of unification. It is also feasible that using more than two active miraculous at once in one form is possible, but that is yet to be discover.

In Season 4, we are given a reveal that embodiment of the concept of the miraculous can result in more abilities, or at the very least can be inferred from Alya's discovery. Ladybug created a new powered up form of her lucky charm and could now create Akuma/Amok warding charms thanks to this power. This aspect of the miraculous is rather new and it is unknown how far this concept can be taken. But the potential demonstrated gives the implication that the limitation of powers on the miraculous is mental.

The miraculous still seem to have more tricks that have yet to be revealed, but the potential from environmental potions, to 100's of unification combinations, and potential to push past limits gives the miraculous a massive pool of potential that make it fascinating.

When it comes to magical items, many always like to know the drawbacks with the magical item involved. The miraculous is no different. Now this is where I find the miraculous is a little murky. At the start the most well known issue with the miraculous was that after the miraculous wielder used the special power of the Kwami, the user only had around 5 minutes before they were forced back. Now with Hawkmoth we never really knew if he was subjected to that rule, since there were times he was off screen. Did he simply have a work around? Was it because he knew something the heroes didnt? That was the biggest mystery until season 3 when its revealed that adults can use the power multiple times without having to de-transform. This explanation was and is still a gripe many people have with the series. The creators gave explanations outside of the show on why that is but it was usually dismissed and still left people angry. However there were still plenty of other drawbacks that the miraculous had.

A major drawback is that the Kwami's condition is related to the condition of the miraculous and vice versa. A broken/damaged miraculous results in the kwami also being damaged. We see this in season 3 with Duusu and the peacock miraculous. Using a damaged miraculous also has an impact on the wielder, slowly draining their life force (as seen with Nathalie) and it appears that overuse can kill the wielder. (which is what happened with Emilie). A Kwami is the reason the miraculous are powerful, without the kwami present, the miraculous is useless. So being too far from one's kwami would make transforming impossible. The kwami being affected by something would also affect the user. Like when Plagg couldnt see due to Chloé's jewlery it is implied if Adrien had transformed, He would have been blind. So the kwami needs to be taken care of, which is a drawback that makes sense.

Another Drawback of the miraculous is revealed in both Silencer and Miracle Queen. The transformation and special power are voice activated. In Silencer, when she had her voice stolen, Ladybug was unable to summon her lucky charm until Silencer used her voice to say the word Lucky charm. And in Miracle Queen, Chloé couldnt utilize the other miraculous because she didnt know the names of the kwami. Without the Kwami's name, the user cant activate the miraculous. It plays on the trope of a name giving the speaker power over the magical being. Using a name also gives a level of respect and it is an interesting drawback as well as a fail safe.

Another drawback that we learn about is that using too many miraculous at once can be dangerous. While this has only been shown in Kwamibuster, when Marinette wore at one point nearly every miraculous at once. Simply transforming caused her to feel a bit woozy. Though after that it did not seem to impact her. There has yet to be seen if abusing unify (like Shadowmoth) and Ladybug have been doing will result in similar effects. But it is something to look out for.

For the most part the potential of the miraculous is put on the user where it is the user figuring ways of utilizing the miraculous that make it more powerful while the drawbacks are mainly limited to the state of the Kwami. This allows for an interesting act of balance where caring for the miraculous would allow the user to evolve, which is something we are seeing in the show, and not taking care of the miraculous or abusing it results in damage, like we see with the villains. Its an interesting parallel that I do wish was explored more.

_____________________________________________________________

Power Balance: The delicate dance

People dont really understand how important balancing power is when it comes to shows. The Hero must be strong enough to save the day, the villain must be a big enough threat for the hero to take seriously. Thats why superman has foes like Darkseid or Braniac. Why Goku fights Frieza, or why Sailor moon has to fight Galaxia.

The miraculous are very bizarre in terms of balance. The strongest miraculous are claimed to be the ladybug and Cat miraculous, the concepts of creation and destruction, Together they maybe the most powerful, but in reality, they are not the strongest. The strongest single miraculous is the Rabbit. A miraculous with the ability to travel through time, it is likely the closet miraculous to being the cat and Ladybug combined. It allows one to change the flow of time. Changing events that could have lead to disaster. And we know that time travel is not multiversal travel, that going to the past DOES impact the timeline. In fact thats the reason its so rarely used, the Rabbit miraculous is a last resort, and if something is a last resort, than its clearly the most powerful. There is also the snake miraculous which has nearly infinite uses regardless of age so long as it is within the 5 minute window. The Horse miraculous that can transport the user anywhere they have in mind, including sending someone into the vacuum of space.

The miraculous power balance also has issues when one considers the two main miraculous, the cat and the Ladybug. Both miraculous are considered crucial to giving someone maximum power and are illustrated like Yin and Yang. But in reality, the Ladybug miraculous is much more powerful than the cat miraculous in nearly every conceivable way. Ignoring the users and just taking their abilities at face value. The cat miraculous has one unique power while the ladybug miraculous has 3. The cat miraculous can destroy anything but the ladybug miraculous can fix any damage done with her miraculous cleansing. The cat miraculous has one piece of jewlery while the Ladybug has two, making it still possible to use with only one earring. Looking at the powers by themselves and not the wielders, one would believe one miraculous was superior to the other.

The power balance between the heroes and the villains seems to be the only one with some care and merit. The peacock and the Butterfly miraculous are at perfect odds with Ladybug and Chat noir. The peacock and the butterfly allow for any sort of power to be created and utilized by an individual or created monster, while the ladybug and cat miraculous are able to purify and fix the person possessed. This allows for a strong balance that means one side must try and out think the other in order to win. The one balance I do think the show captured correctly is the balance between the heroes and villains. Ladybug and Chat noir always managed to foil Shadowmoth's plans but shadowmoth gets more creative and does have small victories from time to time, but never actually wins the day. It is enough to keep the viewer on their toes and keeps the power balance from being too predictable.

The miraculous in terms of balance are... a mess, and I do think that the powers given to the miraculous in some cases were not well thought out. It is hard to say that the miraculous follow a proper balance of power or even dynamic. But the balance is hard to maintain when one is trying to have over a dozen different magical items, its natural that some would be more powerful than others.

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Final thoughts

The Miraculous are incredibly interesting magical items and its understandable how appealing they are to viewers. They arent just unobtanium or a generic magic powersource that villain can pursue. The miraculous have sentience and special unique characteristics that make them so much more. While the power balance is something I find problem with, the matters of lore and kwami help keep the user invested and I feel it makes the miraculous well... Miraculous. I find the miraculous fascinating and while at times ridiculous, the potential development has me marveling at their beauty.

(thanks for this commission and sorry it took months to make. Season 4 put a wrench in this and I needed to utilize what was learned to add to it)

[shortnotsweet]

Bakudeku: A Non-Comprehensive Dissection of the Exploitation of Working Bodies, the Murder of Annoying Children, and a Rivals-to-Lovers Complex

I. Bakudeku in Canon, And Why Anti’s Need to Calm the Fuck Down

II. Power is Power: the Brain-Melting Process of Normalization and Toxic Masculinity

III. How to Kill Middle Schoolers, and Why We Should

IV. Parallels in Abuse, EnemiesRivals-to-Lovers, and the Necessity of Redemption ft. ATLA’s Zuko

V. Give it to Me Straight. It’s Homophobic.

VI. Love in Perspective, from the East v. West

VII. Stuck in the Sludge, the Past, and Season One

Disclaimer

It needs to be said that there is definitely a place for disagreement, discourse, debate, and analysis: that is a sign of an active fandom that’s heavily invested, and not inherently a bad thing at all. Considering the amount of source material we do have (from the manga, to the anime, to the movies, to the light novels, to the official art), there are going to be warring interpretations, and that’s inevitable.

I started watching and reading MHA pretty recently, and just got into the fandom. I was weary for a reason, and honestly, based on what I’ve seen, I’m still weary now. I’ve seen a lot of anti posts, and these are basically my thoughts. This entire thing is in no way comprehensive, and it’s my own opinion, so take it with a grain of salt. If I wanted to be thorough about this, I would’ve included manga panels, excerpts from the light novel, shots from the anime, links to other posts/essays/metas that have inspired this, etc. but I’m tired and not about that life right now, so, this is what it is. This is poorly organized, but maybe I’ll return to fix it.

Let’s begin.

Bakudeku in Canon, And Why Anti’s Need to Calm the Fuck Down

There are a lot of different reasons, that can be trivial as you like, to ship or not to ship two (or more) characters. It could be based purely off of character design, proximity, aversion to another ship, or hypotheticals. And I do think that it’s totally valid if someone dislikes the ship or can’t get on board with his character because to them, it does come across as abuse, and the implications make them uncomfortable or, or it just feels unhealthy. If that is your takeaway, and you are going to stick to your guns, the more power to you.

But Bakudeku’s relationship has canonically progressed to the point where it’s not the emotionally (or physically) abusive clusterfuck some people portray it to be, and it’s cheap to assume that it would be, based off of their characterizations as middle schoolers. Izuku intentionally opens the story as a naive little kid who views the lens of the Hero society through rose colored glasses and arguably wants nothing more than assimilation into that society; Bakugou is a privileged little snot who embodies the worst and most hypocritical beliefs of this system. Both of them are intentionally proven wrong. Both are brainwashed, as many little children are, by the propaganda and societal norms that they are exposed to. Both of their arcs include unlearning crucial aspects of the Hero ideology in order to become true heroes.

I will personally never simp for Bakugou because for the longest time, I couldn't help but think of him as a little kid on the playground screaming at the top of his lungs because someone else is on the swingset. He’s red in the face, there are probably veins popping out of his neck, he’s losing it. It’s easy to see why people would prefer Tododeku to Bakudeku.

Even now, seeing him differently, I still personally wouldn’t date Bakugou, especially if I had other options. Why? I probably wouldn’t want to date any of the guys who bullied me, especially because I think that schoolyard bullying, even in middle school, affected me largely in a negative way and created a lot of complexes I’m still trying to work through. I haven’t built a better relationship with them, and I’m not obligated to. Still, I associate them with the kind of soft trauma that they inflicted upon me, and while to them it was probably impersonal, to me, it was an intimate sort of attack that still affects me. That being said, that is me. Those are my personal experiences, and while they could undoubtedly influence how I interpret relationships, I do not want to project and hinder my own interpretation of Deku.

The reality is that Deku himself has an innate understanding of Bakugou that no one else does; I mention later that he seems to understand his language, implicitly, and I do stand by that. He understands what it is he’s actually trying to say, often why he’s saying it, and while others may see him as wimpy or unable to stand up for himself, that’s simply not true. Part of Deku’s characterization is that he is uncommonly observant and empathetic; I’m not denying that Bakugou caused harm or inflicted damage, but infantilizing Deku and preaching about trauma that’s not backed by canon and then assuming random people online excuse abuse is just...the leap of leaps, and an actual toxic thing to do. I’ve read fan works where Bakugou is a bully, and that’s all, and has caused an intimate degree of emotional, mental, and physical insecurity from their middle school years that prevents their relationship from changing, and that’s for the better. I’m not going to argue and say that it’s not an interesting take, or not valid, or has no basis, because it does. Its basis is the character that Bakugou was in middle school, and the person he was when he entered UA.

Not only is Bakugou — the current Bakugou, the one who has accumulated memories and experiences and development — not the same person he was at the beginning of the story, but Deku is not the same person, either. Maybe who they are fundamentally, at their core, stays the same, but at the beginning and end of any story, or even their arcs within the story, the point is that characters will undergo change, and that the reader will gain perspective.

“You wanna be a hero so bad? I’ve got a time-saving idea for you. If you think you’ll have a quirk in your next life...go take a swan dive off the roof!”

Yes. That is a horrible thing to tell someone, even if you are a child, even if you don’t understand the implications, even if you don’t mean what it is you are saying. Had someone told me that in middle school, especially given our history and the context of our interactions, I don’t know if I would ever have forgiven them.

Here’s the thing: I’m not Deku. Neither is anyone reading this. Deku is a fictional character, and everyone we know about him is extrapolated from source material, and his response to this event follows:

“Idiot! If I really jumped, you’d be charged with bullying me into suicide! Think before you speak!”

I think it’s unfair to apply our own projections as a universal rather than an interpersonal interpretation; that’s not to say that the interpretation of Bakudeku being abusive or having unbalanced power dynamics isn’t valid, or unfounded, but rather it’s not a universal interpretation, and it’s not canon. Deku is much more of a verbal thinker; in comparison, Bakugou is a visual one, at least in the format of the manga, and as such, we get various panels demonstrating his guilt, and how deep it runs. His dialogue and rapport with Deku has undeniably shifted, and it’s very clear that the way they treat each other has changed from when they were younger. Part of Bakugou’s growth is him gaining self awareness, and eventually, the strength to wield that. He knows what a fucked up little kid he was, and he carries the weight of that.

���At that moment, there were no thoughts in my head. My body just moved on its own.”

There’s a part of me that really, really disliked Bakugou going into it, partially because of what I’d seen and what I’d heard from a limited, outside perspective. I felt like Bakugou embodied the toxic masculinity (and to an extent, I still believe that) and if he won in some way, that felt like the patriarchy winning, so I couldn't help but want to muzzle and leash him before releasing him into the wild.

The reality, however, of his character in canon is that it isn’t very accurate to assume that he would be an abusive partner in the future, or that Midoryia has not forgiven him to some extent already, that the two do not care about each other or are singularly important, that they respect each other, or that the narrative has forgotten any of this.

Don’t mistake me for a Bakugou simp or apologist. I’m not, but while I definitely could also see Tododeku (and I have a soft spot for them, too, their dynamic is totally different and unique, and Todoroki is arguably treated as the tritagonist) and I’m ambivalent about Izuocha (which is written as cannoncially romantic) I do believe that canonically, Bakugou and Deku are framed as soulmates/character foils, Sasuke + Naruto, Kageyama + Hinata style. Their relationship is arguably the focus of the series. That’s not to undermine the importance or impact of Deku’s relationships with other characters, and theirs with him, but in terms of which one takes priority, and which one this all hinges on?

The manga is about a lot of things, yes, but if it were to be distilled into one relationship, buckle up, because it’s the Bakudeku show.

Power is Power: the Brain-Melting Process of Normalization and Toxic Masculinity

One of the ways in which the biopolitical prioritization of Quirks is exemplified within Hero society is through Quirk marriages. Endeavor partially rationalizes the abuse of his family through the creation of a child with the perfect quirk, a child who can be molded into the perfect Hero. People with powerful, or useful abilities, are ranked high on the hierarchy of power and privilege, and with a powerful ability, the more opportunities and avenues for success are available to them.

For the most part, Bakugou is a super spoiled, privileged little rich kid who is born talented but is enabled for his aggressive behavior and, as a child, cannot move past his many internalized complexes, treats his peers like shit, and gets away with it because the hero society he lives in either has this “boys will be boys” mentality, or it’s an example of the way that power, or Power, is systematically prioritized in this society. The hero system enables and fosters abusers, people who want power and publicity, and people who are genetically predisposed to have advantages over others. There are plenty of good people who believe in and participate in this system, who want to be good, and who do good, but that doesn’t change the way that the hero society is structured, the ethical ambiguity of the Hero Commission, and the way that Heroes are but pawns, idols with machine guns, used to sell merch to the public, to install faith in the government, or the current status quo, and reinforce capitalist propaganda. Even All Might, the epitome of everything a Hero should be, is drained over the years, and exists as a concept or idea, when in reality he is a hollow shell with an entire person inside, struggling to survive. Hero society is functionally dependent on illusion.

In Marxist terms: There is no truth, there is only power.

Although Bakugou does change, and I think that while he regrets his actions, what is long overdue is him verbally expressing his remorse, both to himself and Deku. One might argue that he’s tried to do it in ways that are compatible with his limited emotional range of expression, and Deku seems to understand this language implicitly.

I am of the opinion that the narrative is building up to a verbal acknowledgement, confrontation, and subsequent apology that only speaks what has gone unspoken.

That being said, Bakugou is a great example of the way that figures of authority (parents, teachers, adults) and institutions both in the real world and this fictional universe reward violent behavior while also leaving mental and emotional health — both his own and of the people Bakugou hurts — unchecked, and part of the way he lashes out at others is because he was never taught otherwise.

And by that, I’m referring to the ways that are to me, genuinely disturbing. For example, yelling at his friends is chill. But telling someone to kill themselves, even casually and without intent and then misinterpreting everything they do as a ploy to make you feel weak because you're projecting? And having no teachers stop and intervene, either because they are afraid of you or because they value the weight that your Quirk can benefit society over the safety of children? That, to me, is both real and disturbing.

Not only that, but his parents (at least, Mitsuki), respond to his outbursts with more outbursts, and while this is likely the culture of their home and I hesitate to call it abusive, I do think that it contributed to the way that he approaches things. Bakugou as a character is very complex, but I think that he is primarily an example of the way that the Hero System fails people.

I don’t think we can write off the things he’s done, especially using the line of reasoning that “He didn’t mean it that way”, because in real life, children who hurt others rarely mean it like that either, but that doesn’t change the effect it has on the people who are victimized, but to be absolutely fair, I don’t think that the majority of Bakudeku shippers, at least now, do use that line of reasoning. Most of them seem to have a handle on exactly how fucked up the Hero society is, and exactly why it fucks up the people embedded within that society.

The characters are positioned in this way for a reason, and the discoveries made and the development that these characters undergo are meant to reveal more about the fictional world — and, perhaps, our world — as the narrative progresses.

The world of the Hero society is dependent, to some degree, on biopolitics. I don’t think we have enough evidence to suggest that people with Quirks or Quirkless people place enough identity or placement within society to become equivalent to marginalized groups, exactly, but we can draw parallels to the way that Deku and by extent Quirkless people are viewed as weak, a deviation, or disabled in some way. Deviants, or non-productive bodies, are shunned for their inability to perform ideal labor. While it is suggested to Deku that he could become a police officer or pursue some other occupation to help people, he believes that he can do the most positive good as a Hero. In order to be a Hero, however, in the sense of a career, one needs to have Power.

Deviation from the norm will be punished or policed unless it is exploitable; in order to become integrated into society, a deviant must undergo a process of normalization and become a working, exploitable body. It is only through gaining power from All Might that Deku is allowed to assimilate from the margins and into the upper ranks of society; the manga and the anime give the reader enough perspective, context, and examples to allow us to critique and deconstruct the society that is solely reliant on power.

Through his societal privileges, interpersonal biases, internalized complexes, and his subsequent unlearning of these ideologies, Bakugou provides examples of the way that the system simultaneously fails and indoctrinates those who are targeted, neglected, enabled by, believe in, and participate within the system.

Bakudeku are two sides of the same coin. We are shown visually that the crucial turning point and fracture in their relationship is when Bakugou refuses to take Deku’s outstretched hand; the idea of Deku offering him help messes with his adolescent perspective in that Power creates a hierarchy that must be obeyed, and to be helped is to be weak is to be made a loser.

Largely, their character flaws in terms of understanding the hero society are defined and entangled within the concept of power. Bakugou has power, or privilege, but does not have the moral character to use it as a hero, and believes that Power, or winning, is the only way in which to view life. Izuku has a much better grasp on the way in which heroes wield power (their ideologies can, at first, be differentiated as winning vs. saving), and is a worthy successor because of this understanding, and of circumstance. However, in order to become a Hero, our hero must first gain the Power that he lacks, and learn to wield it.

As the characters change, they bridge the gaps of their character deficiencies, and are brought closer together through character parallelism.

Two sides of the same coin, an outstretched hand.

They are better together.

How to Kill Middle Schoolers, and Why We Should

I think it’s fitting that in the manga, a critical part of Bakugou’s arc explicitly alludes to killing the middle school version of himself in order to progress into a young adult. In the alternative covers Horikoshi released, one of them was a close up of Bakugou in his middle school uniform, being stabbed/impaled, with blood rolling out of his mouth. Clearly this references the scene in which he sacrifices himself to save Deku, on a near-instinctual level.

To me, this only cements Horikoshi’s intent that middle school Bakugou must be debunked, killed, discarded, or destroyed in order for Bakugou the hero to emerge, which is why people who do actually excuse his actions or believe that those actions define him into young adulthood don’t really understand the necessity for change, because they seem to imply that he doesn’t need/cannot reach further growth, and there doesn’t need to be a separation between the Bakugou who is, at heart, volatile and repressed the angry, and the Bakugou who sacrifices himself, a hero who saves people.

Plot twist: there does need to be a difference. Further plot twist: there is a difference.

In sacrificing himself for Deku, Bakugou himself doesn't die, but the injury is fatal in the sense that it could've killed him physically and yet symbolizes the selfish, childish part of him that refused to accept Deku, himself, and the inevitability of change. In killing those selfish remnants, he could actually become the kind of hero that we the reader understand to be the true kind.

That’s why I think that a lot of the people who stress his actions as a child without acknowledging the ways he has changed, grown, and tried to fix what he has broken don’t really get it, because it was always part of his character arc to change and purposely become something different and better. If the effects of his worst and his most childish self stick with you more, and linger despite that, that’s okay. But distilling his character down to the wrong elements doesn’t get you the bare essentials; what it gets you is a skewed and shallow version of a person. If you’re okay with that version, that is also fine.

But you can’t condemn others who aren’t fine with that incomplete version, and to become enraged that others do not see him as you do is childish.

Bakugou’s change and the emphasis on that change is canon.

Parallels in Abuse, EnemiesRivals-to-Lovers, and the Necessity of Redemption ft. ATLA’s Zuko

In real life, the idea that “oh, he must bully you because he likes you” is often used as a way to brush aside or to excuse the action of bullying itself, as if a ‘secret crush’ somehow negates the effects of bullying on the victim or the inability of the bully to properly process and manifest their emotions in certain ways. It doesn’t. It often enables young boys to hurt others, and provides figures of authority to overlook the real source of schoolyard bullying or peer review. The “secret crush”, in real life, is used to undermine abuse, justify toxic masculinity, and is essentially used as a non-solution solution.

A common accusation is that Bakudeku shippers jump on the pairing because they romanticize pairing a bully and a victim together, or believe that the only way for Bakugou to atone for his past would be to date Midoryia in the future. This may be true for some people, in which case, that’s their own preference, but based on my experience and what I’ve witnessed, that’s not the case for most.

The difference being is that as these are characters, we as readers or viewers are meant to analyze them. Not to justify them, or to excuse their actions, but we are given the advantage of the outsider perspective to piece their characters together in context, understand why they are how they are, and witness them change; maybe I just haven’t been exposed to enough of the fandom, but no one (I’ve witnessed) treats the idea that “maybe Bakugou has feelings he can’t process or understand and so they manifest in aggressive and unchecked ways'' as a solution to his inability to communicate or process in a healthy way, rather it is just part of the explanation of his character, something is needs to — and is — working through. The solution to his middle school self is not the revelation of a “teehee, secret crush”, but self-reflection, remorse, and actively working to better oneself, which I do believe is canonically reflected, especially as of recently.

In canon, they are written to be partners, better together than apart, and I genuinely believe that one can like the Bakudeku dynamic not by route of romanticization but by observation.

I do think we are meant to see parallels between him and Endeavor; Endeavor is a high profile abuser who embodies the flaws and hypocrisy of the hero system. Bakugou is a schoolyard bully who emulates and internalizes the flaws of this system as a child, likely due to the structure of the society and the way that children will absorb the propaganda they are exposed to; the idea that Quirks, or power, define the inherent value of the individual, their ability to contribute to society, and subsequently their fundamental human worth. The difference between them is the fact that Endeavor is the literal adult who is fully and knowingly active within a toxic, corrupt system who forces his family to undergo a terrifying amount of trauma and abuse while facing little to no consequences because he knows that his status and the values of their society will protect him from those consequences. In other words, Endeavor is the threat of what Bakugou could have, and would have, become without intervention or genuine change.

Comparisons between characters, as parallels or foils, are tricky in that they imply but cannot confirm sameness. Having parallels with someone does not make them the same, by the way, but can serve to illustrate contrasts, or warnings. Harry Potter, for example, is meant to have obvious parallels with Tom Riddle, with similar abilities, and tragic upbringings. That doesn’t mean Harry grows up to become Lord Voldemort, but rather he helps lead a cross-generational movement to overthrow the facist regime. Harry is offered love, compassion, and friends, and does not embrace the darkness within or around him. As far as moldy old snake men are concerned, they do not deserve a redemption arc because they do not wish for one, and the truest of change only occurs when you actively try to change.

To be frank, either way, Bakugou was probably going to become a good Hero, in the sense that Endeavor is a ‘good’ Hero. Hero capitalized, as in a pro Hero, in the sense that it is a career, an occupation, and a status. Because of his strong Quirk, determination, skill, and work ethic, Bakugou would have made a good Hero. Due to his lack of character, however, he was not on the path to become a hero; defender of the weak, someone who saves people to save people, who is willing to make sacrifices detrimental to themselves, who saves people out of love.

It is necessary for him to undergo both a redemption arc and a symbolic death and rebirth in order for him to follow the path of a hero, having been inspired and prompted by Deku.

I personally don’t really like Endeavor’s little redemption arc, not because I don’t believe that people can change or that they shouldn't at least try to atone for the atrocities they have committed, but because within any narrative, a good redemption arc is important if it matters; what also matters is the context of that arc, and whether or not it was needed. For example, in ATLA, Zuko’s redemption arc is widely regarded as one of the best arcs in television history, something incredible. And it is. That shit fucks. In a good way.

It was confirmed that Azula was also going to get a redemption arc, had Volume 4 gone on as planned, and it was tentatively approached in the comics, which are considered canon. She is an undeniably bad person (who is willing to kill, threaten, exploit, and colonize), but she is also a child, and as viewers, we witness and recognize the factors that contributed to her (debatable) sociopathy, and the way that the system she was raised in failed her. Her family failed her; even Uncle Iroh, the wise mentor who helps guide Zuko to see the light, is willing to give up on her immediately, saying that she’s “crazy” and needs to be “put down”. Yes, it’s comedic, and yes, it’s pragmatic, but Azula is fourteen years old. Her mother is banished, her father is a psychopath, and her older brother, from her perspective, betrayed and abandoned her. She doesn’t have the emotional support that Zuko does; she exploits and controls her friends because it’s all she’s been taught to do; she says herself, her “own mother thought [she] was a monster; she was right, of course, but it still [hurts]”. A parent who does not believe in you, or a parent that uses you and will hurt you, is a genuine indicator of trauma.

The writers understood that both Zuko and Azula deserved redemption arcs. One was arguably further gone than the other, but that doesn’t change the fact that they are both children, products of their environment, who have the time, motive, and reason to change.

In contrast, you know who wouldn’t have deserved a redemption arc? Ozai. That simply would not have been interesting, wouldn’t have served the narrative well, and honestly, is not needed, thematically or otherwise. Am I comparing Ozai to Endeavor? Basically, yes. Fuck those guys. I don’t see a point in Endeavor’s little “I want to be a good dad now” arc, and I think that we don’t need to sympathize with characters in order to understand them or be interested in them. I want Touya/Dabi to expose his abuse, for his career to crumble, and then for him to die.

If they are not challenging the system that we the viewer are meant to question, and there is no thematic relevance to their redemption, is it even needed?

On that note, am I saying that Bakugou is the equivalent to Zuko? No, lmao. Definitely not. They are different characters with different progressions and different pressures. What I am saying is that good redemption arcs shouldn’t be handed out like candy to babies; it is the quality, rather than the quantity, that makes a redemption arc good. In terms of the commentary of the narrative, who needs a redemption arc, who is deserving, and who does it make sense to give one to?

In this case, Bakugou checks those boxes. It was always in the cards for him to change, and he has. In fact, he’s still changing.

Give it to Me Straight. It’s Homophobic.

There does seem to be an urge to obsessively gender either Bakugou or Deku, in making Deku the ultra-feminine, stereotypically hyper-sexualized “woman” of the relationship, with Bakugou becoming similarly sexualized but depicted as the hyper-masculine bodice ripper. On some level, that feels vaguely homophobic if not straight up misogynistic, in that in a gay relationship there’s an urge to compel them to conform under heteronormative stereotypes in order to be interpreted as real or functional. On one hand, I will say that in a lot of cases it feels like more of an expression of a kink, or fetishization and subsequent expression of internalized misogyny, at least, rather than a genuine exploration of the complexity and power imbalances of gender dynamics, expression, and boundaries.

That being said, I don’t think that that problematic aspect of shipping is unique to Bakudeku, or even to the fandom in general. We’ve all read fan work or see fanart of most gay ships in a similiar manner, and I think it’s a broader issue to be addressed than blaming it on a singular ship and calling it a day.

One interpretation of Bakugou’s character is his repression and the way his character functions under toxic masculinity, in a society’s egregious disregard for mental and emotional health (much like in the real world), the horrifying ways in which rage is rationalized or excused due to the concept of masculinity, and the way that characteristics that are associated with femininity — intellect, empathy, anxiety, kindness, hesitation, softness — are seen as stereotypically “weak”, and in men, traditionally emasculating. In terms of the way that the fictional universe is largely about societal priority and power dynamics between individuals and the way that extends to institutions, it’s not a total stretch to guess that gender as a construct is a relevant topic to expand on or at least keep in mind for comparison.

I think that the way in which characters are gendered and the extent to which that is a result of invasive heteronormativity and fetishization is a really important conversation to have, but using it as a case-by-case evolution of a ship used to condemn people isn’t conductive, and at that point, it’s treated as less of a real concern but an issue narrowly weaponised.

Love in Perspective, from the East v. West

Another thing I think could be elaborated on and written about in great detail is the way that the Eastern part of the fandom and the Western part of the fandom have such different perspectives on Bakudeku in particular. I am not going to go in depth with this, and there are many other people who could go into specifics, but just as an overview:

The manga and the anime are created for and targeted at a certain audience; our take on it will differ based on cultural norms, decisions in translation, understanding of the genre, and our own region-specific socialization. This includes the way in which we interpret certain relationships, the way they resonate with us, and what we do and do not find to be acceptable. Of course, this is not a case-by-case basis, and I’m sure there are plenty of people who hold differing beliefs within one area, but speaking generally, there is a reason that Bakudeku is not regarded as nearly as problematic in the East.

Had this been written by a Western creator, marketed primarily to and within the West (for reference, while I am Chinese, but I have lived in the USA for most of my life, so my own perspective is undoubtedly westernized), I would’ve immediately jumped to make comparisons between the Hero System and the American police system, in that a corrupt, or bastardized system is made no less corrupt for the people who do legitimately want to do good and help people, when that system disproportionately values and targets others while relying on propaganda that society must be reliant on that system in order to create safe communities when in reality it perpetuates just as many issues as it appears to solve, not to mention the way it attracts and rewards violent and power-hungry people who are enabled to abuse their power. I think comparisons can still be made, but in terms of analysis, it should be kept in mind that the police system in other parts of the world do not have the same history, place, and context as it does in America, and the police system in Japan, for example, probably wasn’t the basis for the Hero System.

As much as I do believe in the Death of the Author in most cases, the intent of the author does matter when it comes to content like this, if merely on the basis that it provides context that we may be missing as foreign viewers.

As far as the intent of the author goes, Bakugou is on a route of redemption.

He deserves it. It is unavoidable. That, of course, may depend on where you’re reading this.

Stuck in the Sludge, the Past, and Season One

If there’s one thing, to me, that epitomizes middle school Bakugou, it’s him being trapped in a sludge monster, rescued by his Quirkless childhood friend, and unable to believe his eyes. He clings to the ideology he always has, that Quirkless means weak, that there’s no way that Deku could have grown to be strong, or had the capacity to be strong all along. Bakugou is wrong about this, and continuously proven wrong. It is only when he accepts that he is wrong, and that Deku is someone to follow, that he starts his real path to heroics.

If Bakudeku’s relationship does not appeal to someone for whatever reason, there’s nothing wrong with that. They can write all they want about why they don’t ship it, or why it bothers them, or why they think it’s problematic. If it is legitimately triggering to you, then by all means, avoid it, point it out, etc. but do not undermine the reality of abuse simply to point fingers, just because you don’t like a ship. People who intentionally use the anti tag knowing it’ll show up in the main tag, go after people who are literally minding their own business, and accuse people of supporting abuse are the ones looking for a fight, and they’re annoying as hell because they don’t bring anything to the table. No evidence, no analysis, just repeated projection.

To clarify, I’m referring to a specific kind of shipper, not someone who just doesn’t like a ship, but who is so aggressive about it for absolutely no reason. There are plenty of very lovely people in this fandom, who mind their own business, multipship, or just don’t care.

Calling shippers dumb or braindead or toxic (to clarify, this isn’t targeting any one person I’ve seen, but a collective) based on projections and generalizations that come entirely from your own impression of the ship rather than observation is...really biased to me, and comes across as uneducated and trigger happy, rather than constructive or helpful in any way.

I’m not saying someone has to ship anything, or like it, in order to be a ‘good’ participant. But inserting derogatory material into a main tag, and dropping buzzwords with the same tired backing behind it without seeming to understand the implications of those words or acknowledging the development, pacing, and intentional change to the characters within the plot is just...I don’t know, it comes across as redundant, to me at least, and very childish. Aggressive. Toxic. Problematic. Maybe the real toxic shippers were the ones who bitched and moaned along the way. They’re like little kids, stuck in the past, unable to visualize or recognize change, and I think that’s a real shame because it’s preventing them from appreciating the story or its characters as it is, in canon.

But that’s okay, really. To each their own. Interpretations will vary, preferences differ, perspectives are not uniform. There is no one truth. There are five seasons of the show, a feature film, and like, thirty volumes as of this year.

All I’m saying is that if you want to stay stuck in the first season of each character, then that’s what you’re going to get. That’s up to you.

This may be edited or revised.

[mariaiscrafting]

I know you aren't a fan of the whole 'educating not cancelling thing', and I don't disagree it has a lot of issues. At the same time, I don't know what a better alternative would be, especially since this method of 'calling out' sometimes reaps very positive results. For example, I just saw on twitter someone discussing how the Sapnap merch design plans (with a 'Japanese aesthetic') were a bit disappointing, and he responded apologizing and saying he's going to change the design now. I'm just looking for thoughts and opinions honestly!

Honestly, I think that what needs to be done is, fandoms need to call out CCs when they say or do something wrong, but with respect and a light touch, while it is the CC's burden to educate their self further. I'm not sure about the Sapnap example, so I will use my own. There was an instance during which a Native American woman addressed Dream's usage of Native American music with a Native war cry for a video. She said she did not want to disrespect him, and she explained why it was offensive, asking him to stop using the music. People got mad at her, as Dream stans are wont to, but she was perfectly within her right to be offended, and she wasn't overly critical or harsh. Dream replied saying he understood, that he was previously ignorant but no longer was, and that he wouldn't use the music anymore. In a perfect world, this is the perfect scenario, with an added element: that Dream went and actually read some of the many sources linked in that huge thread on the history of Native American appropriation and stereotypes of warlike behavior (i.e., using Native clothing, music, cries, markings/paint, and headdresses in non-Native and incorrect contexts to signify war). This is the ideal outcome and strategy to education.

First, I would like fans to make CCs aware. I want them to be 100% clear and concise in their grievances. A couple of problems in the past: people addressing Tommy w/KSI, not specifying that they wished for Tommy to realize that KSI was criticized not simply because of stan behavior but for his transphobic past, and making Tommy think they thought he himself was being transphobic; people not specifying what exactly it was about Fundy's Jackbox jokes that normalized sexual assault and mocked female victims of sexual violence, resulting Fundy in issuing a blanket apology that didn't tackle the particular issue or its intricacies.

Second, I would like fans to treat CCs with respect when addressing their grievances. Respect includes being, perhaps stern if need be, but not criticizing or attacking. This is not only for the sake of the CC their self, but also for the sake of the fandom since any person is more likely to listen to one's criticisms when they aren't worded as direct attacks. This step was failed in many instances, including when people addressed Andi about the various things she has tweeted or said, causing the entire community to vilify her and warp her actual words into a mess of bigotry that is not true to reality.

Third, I would like CCs to reach out to others to educate themselves and demonstrate that they were educated, through their words and actions. It is nearly impossible to be comprehensively educated on a subject in which you harbor underlying prejudices and ignorance through Twitter threads, especially when Twitter posts are capped at 280 characters and the people sending you information are largely strangers, and their information unverifiable. Unraveling years of ignorance that led to unintentionally displaying one's subconscious prejudices takes real work, time, and effort, and it is up to every individual to ensure that they reach a new level of understanding, in order to stimulate self-growth. CCs have demonstrated a failure to do this in regards to anti-Semitism throughout jokes and bits, particularly in Jackbox streams, given that a few of them seemed to apologize and move on, while continuing to make anti-Semitic jokes in later streams, seemingly without gaining a deeper understanding of their own, harbored anti-Semitism and/or ignorance on Jewish oppression.

This is just what I think is the formula for a successful CC reeducation effort. Whether or not this is actually the solution is to be seen since Twitter is still stuck on old ways. Hopefully people learn just how poorly the reeducation campaigns are going nowadays, and to change their tactics.

[maximura]

It’s honestly so nice to know that I’m not alone in feeling disappointed with bts new/for awhile stuff. I remember when they first debuted. Their musical growth through the years has been great, but it’s weirdly validating to read that I’m not the only one who feels like they’ve sold out. Tbh, I also feel like when they came out with dynamite I haven’t been super interested in following their music. I also agree with the anon that said the fandom played a factor in distance. Maybe I’ll get hate for this, but I never considered or even wanted to be an army. In the earlier days, yeah I’d definitely tell someone I was a fan if they asked. For so long though, it feels scary/army are generally cultish/out of line/blind to their own toxicity.

However, I’d say in general it seems that “stanning” and fandoms (even kpop in general perhaps) has become less about music for music sake and more on how many views, how many awards, etc etc. Maybe it’s an oldish view (literally age) because I started kpop as a Big Bang/2NE1/Shinee/Kara/Infinite/block b/etc fan, and many of the people I met and know have felt similar things and more distanced from fandoms too. I really enjoy listening to various kpop groups, but I feel like it’s hard to follow, keep up, and be what’s considered “true fan/Stan”. Also, with the new groups thatve come out like enhyphen, aespa, (idk others) I feel so out of touch!

Any recommendations for new groups and songs to listen to? Also sorry I’m on mobile and idk shit about formatting. I’m also doing this anon because I don’t want direct hate. You’re a braver person than me

I'm not brave. I just don't care what people think.

I understand what you are going through and you are definitely not alone. I find that it's a lot of us older fans who feel like this because we have all that history behind us.

Do I have recommendations? I always have recommendations dude. Most of them are in my KPOP BIASES AS posts. But here is what I 100% recommend right now (if you haven't already listened to them):

1) Lovesong by TXT. I went from being disappointed to being obsessed. I literally play this every single day because it is so cathartic. I want more of this in KPOP. I linked to the original studio version but I love the Band Version, live versions and there's also a fucking amazing Rap Remix version.

2) Drunk Dazed by Enhypen. They are worth your time. If only for this era and this song. I really love their Relay dance to this and their live stages. I have never bought a song so fast. I don't think it had even finished playing and I purchased it already. That chorus is just insane. Mayhaps I adopted Niki. Mayhaps. What about it.....

3) Lazy by Woosung. Proving that being chill doesn't mean being slack with good writing and composition. This song is just so perfect to vibe with. His voice is just magical. It's a crime that this isn't bigger than it is.

4) Advice by Taemin. Not new but I'm biased. I have to bring him into everything ok. His albums are no-skip albums for me. I love the piano on this and the really unusual delivery of his verses. He's so next level, man. He's doing things nobody thinks to do.

6) Anti Romantic by TXT. This is really impressive and beautiful. There should just never be any auto tune /post production treatment on their voices. I like the raw imperfections, it gives their music another edge to it.

7) Driver's Licence by Woojin and Gaho. Not a new song but this is one of the best covers I have ever heard in KPOP. The vocal control and talent and level of skill it took to deliver this performance is beyond my comprehension. It makes a lot of things look amateur in comparison but that's just my personal opinion.

8) Given-Taken by Enhypen. I couldn't decide between this or Fever but I think Given-Taken has a better chorus. I also weirdly prefer it in Japanese. It just flows better. The Japanese MV is also miles better because I think the aesthetic and lighting fits the song really well.

[bettsfic]

february pinned: the real & the ideal

in this month’s edition of my lowkey writing-related newsletter, in addition to my writing-related post roundup and consultation availability, i have short story recommendations for you and an essay on the nature of reality in fiction! 

if you want to receive my lowkey writing-related newsletter directly, you can subscribe here.

in other news, i finished two fics this month:

digging for orchids (hualian, 43k, explicit, fake marriage au)

let ruin end here (hualian, 8k, mature, neighbors au)

full newsletter below the cut, or you can read it here.

oof,

what a month. january is already a rough time. throwing in a pandemic, a coup, and an economic revolution spearheaded by reddit just seems unfair. as for me personally, the spring semester came at me fast and even though it’s only week 2, i am already buried in grading. which i realize is my fault, considering i’m the one who assigned homework.

so after hearing your feedback, i thought i’d make this newsletter even more writing-related by writing more about writing. this month i’ll start off by talking about the nature of reality in fiction in a segment i call “been thinkin a lot about.” more on that below.

new resource

i’ve compiled a folder of PDFs of the short stories i teach most often, which is to say, the stories i like enough to re-read every semester. most of them are literary fiction but a few veer into fantasy, sci fi, and horror.

i know before the MFA, i didn’t really know what a short story was. like i knew, abstractly, the concept of a short story (it is as it sounds), but i could only list a couple i’d ever read as an adult, and i hadn’t read anything that had been published in the last decade. i remember wondering why i was even being asked to care about short stories. who writes short stories? who reads them? apparently, a lot of people. short storyists are a lot like fanwriters in that they make no money and when you talk about your writing in public, people give you that “why would anyone waste their time with that?” look.

so here’s why i was asked to care about short stories: a good short story gives you the entirety of a world in a very condensed space. moreover, it can sometimes leave you as satisfied as a novel in a fraction of the reading time. all the stories i’ve compiled here are ones that stuck with me, that i find myself recommending over and over to writers who want a good example of developing character, or weird narration, or establishing stakes.

if you’re a writer considering publication or an MFA in creative writing, i highly recommend familiarizing yourself with short stories, if for no other reason than to get the feel for them so you can write some of your own. if you can get a few short story publications under your belt, it’ll be easier to open doors when you’re ready to query agents for a novel. also, short stories make a great writing sample for grad programs, workshops, fellowships, residencies, and grant funding.

if you want to check out more short stories but have no idea where to start, the 2020 best american short stories just dropped in november, or if you want a cheaper one, used copies of 2019 and earlier are available on thriftbooks. if you want an overview of the history of the (american) short story, there’s also the best american short stories of the century. fair warning, though, while it’s more diverse than expected, it’s still a bit heavy on dead-white-dude writing.

content warning: the stories in the above-linked folder may depict instances of sexual assault, suicide, and/or abuse. i have not labeled them individually with warnings but i hope to soon, as well as provide a catalog with summaries.

i’m also still working on my essay and novel recs. more to come on that hopefully next month.

writing-related posts

how i quit my banking job to do a creative writing MFA

how i learned to read faster/stop subvocalizing

how to write when you have no time or energy to write

my experience writing fic in small/dead fandoms (aka fics that will probably not get any traffic)

how to describe facial expressions

how to ask for help from your professors

how to navigate tenses during flashbacks

how to separate yourself from your work

how (and why you might want to) write a shitty first draft

why you should consider making the climax the inciting incident

for a complete list of my writing-related posts, check out this masterdoc (which i still need to update it with the past few months’ posts).

stuff i’m into rn

i’m about halfway through the rhetoric of fiction by wayne c. booth which has more or less become my narrative bible. it’s a little dated (1961) but it tackles banal writing adages that are somehow still believed, like “show don’t tell” and whatnot, and breaks them down with amazing insight, clarity, and research. it’s a bit of a dense text so i’m only reading a few pages a day, i think the first time i’ve ever let myself read something so intentionally slowly. now i’m kind of obsessed with doing things slowly. reading slowly, writing slowly, cooking slowly. i even drive slowly, because it’s so rare to go anywhere at all, and i want to enjoy it. also, it’s very snowy where i am. also also, the battery died in my car this month and i really have to make it a point to drive more often.

february availability

i have 2 openings for initial writing consultations in february! if you’re interested, please fill out this google form.

you can learn more about my services on my carrd.

been thinkin a lot about

compulsory reality in fiction. many of us have probably received feedback along the lines of, or thought to ourselves as we read, “that’s not realistic.” many of us believe, consciously or not, that fiction that is more “realistic” is inherently better than fiction that is less “realistic.” for some of us, real means a saturation of details, the clear depiction of the surfaces of things. reality is found in the rendering thereof; if you can “see” it, it’s real. for others of us, it might be the development of complex characters and their growth across a narrative. and for yet others, reality is subtlety, or misery, or the idea of “slice of life,” a term i don’t think means anything, because aren’t all stories a slice of a character’s life? what would a story that’s not a slice of life look like? you’d either have to take away the “slice” part and render a whole life, which is impossible, or you’d have to take away the “life” part and create a dead story, which may be possible, but why would you want to? even if you wrote a story about a rock, the rock would be brought to life by virtue of being written about.

anyway. i think the word “real” is a shitty word for the same reason “slice of life” is a shitty phrase: everything is real and therefore nothing cannot be real. slices of life are all we know because we are alive and cannot truly perceive not being alive; reality is also all we know, and any depictions beyond reality are thus made real because they have been depicted.

so the “goal” for fiction to be “realistic” seems to me to be a false one. all fiction is real because it exists and no fiction can be truly real because it’s only a facsimile of reality. not to get all “this is not a pipe” but writing is just making squiggles, and we as a community of English-knowers agree that certain squiggles correspond to certain sounds, and certain sounds together make words which conjure meanings. and words put together into sentences into paragraphs conjure even more complicated meanings. and when those paragraphs are woven into narrative we create yet more and more complicated meaning.

every time you write anything — a text message, an email, a tweet, a fanfic — you are taking the infinite abstraction of your own cognition, narrowing it into a single concept, and representing that concept with patterns in the form of sounds represented by letters and given meaning with words, so that the infinite abstraction of your own conscience can be fractionally witnessed by the infinite abstraction of someone else’s. and even though we can’t definitively prove for ourselves that any other thing possesses a consciousness, writing shows us the shape of someone else’s mind, and tells us we are not alone.

and yet we still expect writing to be “real.”

have you ever read a story where a character sneezed? like just, a description of a sneeze for the sake of it, with no purpose or function in the plot? if not, is it because our characters aren’t real enough to sneeze, or because the sneeze isn’t relevant to their plight? what would a written sneeze look like, and why would somebody want to write it? moreover, why would somebody want to read it? that leads me to wonder, do we depict reality in the service of narrative, or narrative in the service of reality? in other words, do we write to portray reality (sans sneezing), or do we depict reality to constrain our writing, the way one might request bumpers when bowling so as not to fall in the gutters?

i’ve never read an artful rendition of a character pissing or shitting, either, even when those things are related to a character’s plight and circumstance — stories involving long road trips, living in the woods, being kidnapped. the only exception i can think of is when those things are eroticized (we do not kinkshame here in this lkwrnl), the same way it’s rare to find detailed sex writing that isn’t for the purpose of reader arousal. are there just some things about the nature of being human that are too intimate, too complex, or too boring to write?

once i wrote a murder that takes place in a small fictional midwestern town in the 90s (for the ~aesthetic), and it went uninvestigated by said town’s police force. early readers repeatedly commented along the lines of, “that’s not realistic.” and i thought, no, if anything, the incompetence of police is too realistic for the heightened reality i’m trying to render. have you ever heard of a cop solving a murder that didn’t come with an obvious suspect or immediately found evidence? i haven’t. that doesn’t mean those cases don’t exist, but i definitely think they’re less likely than mass media has us believe, and the average small-town police force has far less motivation (and possibly training) to solve crimes than we think.

i started working on the above-mentioned novel in 2016, and my goal was to depict a reality that hovers above the surface of plausibility. in this novel, which is based on macbeth, a preteen girl, mercy, becomes jealous of the love her best friend elisa shows to her father. mercy decides to get her older and very unstable brother to kill him. naturally the deed goes awry, but it does occur, and the cleanup is far messier than anticipated.

is it plausible for a 12 year old girl to plot and execute the murder of her best friend’s father? no. is that what this book is about? yes. a book about a 12 year old girl who has a perfectly healthy relationship with her best friend and who has no feelings toward her bff’s father one way or another is probably far more “realistic,” but that’s not the book i’d want to read and certainly not the one i want to write. my goal of a heightened reality is what henry james calls the intensity of illusion, the thing that allows a reader, through the witness of one’s distilled cognition into language, to exit physical, knowable reality, and enter a new and unknown reality. and isn’t climbing to that higher place, that intensity of illusion, the purpose of fiction? if it’s not, what is?

the best feedback i got on the aforementioned murder scene was from one of my professors, who, of the perfect calm of all children involved, said, “they just shot a guy. at least one of them would be freaking out.”

he was totally right, but it opened up a lot of questions for me. by what standard did he reach that conclusion? was it something in the chapter itself, was it his personal understanding of the work of narrative, or was it the logical conclusion of the slim plausibility of the scenario? moreover, where did i come up with the idea that all of my preteen characters would commit a murder and proceed to be very chill about it? if an implausible scenario begs the expectation of emotional distress, would it be more compelling to buy into that expectation or deviate from it? is it even my obligation to be compelling when i can never have a cogent grasp of the personal tastes of my audience?

that brings me to what appears to be reality’s opposite: idealism, the state those of us who write fanfic are often trying to achieve. we’re working in an entire genre of ideals, of happily ever afters, of hurt that is always followed by comfort, of glossily rendered sex during which everyone orgasms and no one has to pee afterward. we fix broken texts and continue incomplete ones. sometimes, we want to make existing things better, deeper, more complicated. but all the time, we want to make a text more than what it is.

some see this process, this drive for the ideal, as antithetical to realism, and i think that’s part of the reason fanfiction and other idealistic genres (romance, etc.) get a bad name — the assumption that more real (which for some means more miserable) is better, and therefore its opposite, the ideal, is worse. for them, i have this quote from vladimir nabokov:

For me a work of fiction exists only insofar as it affords me what I shall bluntly call aesthetic bliss, that is a sense of being somehow, somewhere, connected with other states of being where art (curiosity, tenderness, kindness, ecstasy) is the norm.

the ideal, aesthetic bliss, the intensity of illusion. these are all phrases that boil down to the same thing: you the writer get to define the constraints of your own reality. you get to choose if your world even complies with the known laws of physics. and if it doesn’t, you get to choose which ones to break, and why to break them. you get to choose if your stories take place in a real house in a real town on a real day. if you wrote a story that takes place on september 11, 2001, would the events of that story be shaped by the events of that actual day, or are you writing a better world where 9/11 doesn’t happen? consider the consequences of both: why might you want to write reality? why might you want to write ideality? how do these things shape your identity and goals as a writer?

no matter where a work falls on the real-ideal spectrum, you have to accept that prose itself will only ever be a verisimilitude of reality and therefore an interpretation of it, one that might be interpreted differently by a reader. in writing and everything else, you can never have complete control over what others perceive. it’s like giving someone cash as a gift. they might buy themselves something nice with it, or they might spend it on groceries. the point is, eventually we all have to let go of our realities.

[scoundrels-in-love]

for the ask meme: 9, 32 & 49 please!

It’s only been 10 days... It’s only a guess which ask game you sent this for...! ^^; (I am basing it on the fact I read the questions and mused about them for this whole time so I am probably right about the game.) @nossbean

9. What are your favorite fanfics?

Oh no. Oh no. I could and should write POSTS upon POSTS about this.

But I haven’t, because I don’t have the energy to. So you get a cheat version of some of my random favorites from my last pages of my AO3 history. And few special shout outs.

@angel-deux-writes Worth is a wholeass gem and I haven’t commented yet, but I binged it basically today (with exception of first chapter) and I can’t stop yelling about it internally, because the way she says things!! She always has some of my favorite Brienne characterization I get so envious over. There is strength and pride in it, and vulnerability and fear and the acknowledgment that her self-loathing is unfounded yet how hard it is to defend yourself, even knowing all that. I could write essays about it and Angel’s stories in general. Anything by her is a treasure trove, truly.

@samirant Rush Me All Night Long is a fascinating concept, so very well executed and absolutely captivating. Makes me go slack-jawed with awe with how seamless it is. And beyond the craftsmanship of the story form itself, the contents are absolutely epic, too. Intrigue, growth of relationship, dash of humor that is right up my alley, lot of good other characters with their wonderful insights... Nothing to add or take away. Just great. And you KNOW you should check rest of her writing out, too. You won’t regret it.

@ajoblotofjunk is back with another subtly, but powerfully in-depth world story with Baby I Will. How many professions has she gotten degree in already? Because the way she weaves art of playing in bars is so organic. And oh, the connection between Jaime and Brienne... Electrifying, a storm that starts as static sparks as they brush past each other. And I can’t wait to watch it grow. (Also shout out to her absolutely beyond epic gift to me, Petrichor. Which is mindblowingly great and written at haste I cannot comprehend. It couldn’t be more tailored to me and I tear up just thinking about it.)

LadyRhiyana’s Stray Sparks II is the perfect example why I tell someone at least once a week “I wish I could LadyRhiyana this”. Her absolutely amazing skill to capture a whole setting, a whole world of emotions in sometimes as few as 5 to 10 sentences (and not the 30 word sort!) is just... Mesmerizing. I admire it so much and am typically absolutely enamored by her stories. Crossover is also in my history and I am absolutely head-over-heels for it.

@kurikaesu-haru Thirsty is the most endearing, captivating way to combine the two meanings of the word and I adore it to pieces. It’s fun and emotional and hot, and everything it could possibly need to be and then some, in best way possible. And her works contain more and more of gold mines, truly.

@firesign23 is a treasure, to this fandom and to me in particular, for many reasons. But her skill to devastate me with short stories is truly something else.  Odd Socks (link to one of my favorite of the lot, but do give them all a read if you haven’t!) is what I have in my history, but I rec her as a writer 1000%. Her prompt fills are always poignant and not shy of ache and I can only marvel at them all. But also how could I miss out on mentioning her two breathtaking recent stories for fic exchange? Hold Steady is a Journey without ever leaving Winterfell, but the miles traveled by weary, worried, longing hearts in it... Oof. And, of course, I have to mention by hearts and hands made fast because it’s for me and it made me cry real tears more than once (!) and actually yell in real life, like no other story. Real and complicated as the characters deserve to be told, painful and comforting, absolutely breathtaking in the prose... I could rant for days, truly. And truly, wherever you look at her work, you’ll find more of it.

@aviss Skin Deep is just gem, gem, gem. Am I biased because she wrote for me, in a sense? Maybe. But she ACED it in ways I can barely comprehend. Everything I could wish for in the concept is there and more. Sweet pining, absolute besottery and realistic realizations and then hot, earnest resolutions... What a gem. As is rest of her works, really!

32. Past or present tense? 

I used to be such a past tense snob. Nothing else for me, no sir. But now I write almost exclusively in present tense. I can’t tell when the shift happened, I think when I was 20 or few years older than that, and I don’t know why, I think I read a good fic, like really good one, and also was trying to bypass my writer’s block by switching it up. And I found a certain freedom in it. A sense that it makes sense for me to go deeper, to be in present turmoil and wax poetics about it for few paragraphs. Because it’s currently happening, instead of retelling if something that has been. It freed me more in past tense, too, though.

It’s odd I don’t remember how and why the shift happened, almost makes me feel sad.

Nowadays I mostly write in past tense because I get too caught up in flashback sort of sequences and can’t make it grammatically correct anymore so I switch everything to past tense. Tomorrow (with you) is prime example.

49. Where do you draw inspiration from? 

Anything. The other day, I was bitterly laughing with a friend I could write a piece about stain on floor, create whole 1-3k word story about someone thinking about the stain, etc. Doesn’t matter if it has funny shape or not, known origin or not.

Most often, though, it’s prompts, it’s song lyrics, it’s some kind of thought/belief I have for character that I want to express/see them through some kind of event in way I think they would. Sometimes, it’s specific setting or watching something. Like, there was one (1) almost head-kiss in a kdrama with secret identities and I created a whole 10k word worth story idea off of it... Sometimes, it’s honestly even just a dumb, dumb post. But yes, music/feelings/prompts, I’d say are the main thing.

And as for inspiration drawn for writing itself... That’s a difficult question for me, right now. In kindest, non-rambly way I’d probably say what other people have lived and written.

Send me fanfic question?<3

[alastanor]

To start, I would like to thank @cis-het-angel-kinnie for bringing this video to my attention, even if it was to praise the video rather than to point out it's flawed arguments against Charlie for main character.

If you have not seen the video yet, I recommend giving it a watch prior to reading this or you may be confused.

Click to read more...

What Is A Protagonist?

I am not bringing up this question because I think the source used was incorrect. However, the statement that "protagonists ask questions and antagonists make arguments" is an oversimplification of both roles. And I am going to explain why.

The trope of protagonist vs antagonist is an age old theme which has been used countless times throughout storytelling's history in books, plays, films, and story-driven video games. As such, the definition of both roles has continued to flourish and evolve over time. It is no longer good vs evil.

While @diregentleman used books written by, I assume, published writers for his argument, I am going to use Creative Writing and Literary Experts from a Masterclass article.

In the article, a protagonist is described as this:

"In storytelling, a protagonist is the main character or principal character or group of characters in a story."

More than one character is capable of being an antagonist in this story. Given that demons are meant to be redeemed, fitting the theme of the story, it is fair to surmise that all (or the majority of) the demons surrounding Charlie are protagonists in some form.

The article goes on to state that the protagonist's goals reflect the overall story goals and the plot moves forward based on their decisions.

This being said, Charlie's overall goal reflects the premise of the story, that being that Hazbin Hotel is a story about redemption. This is a goal that Angel Dust does not have.

In DireGentleman's video, he claims Angel Dust joined the Happy Hotel with the intention of being redeemed, albeit skeptical whether it could actually be done. This is actually inaccurate, and we see this in both the pilot and the comic.

Angel does display skepticism straight from the gate, but when they explain their reason for approaching him (that no one else has agreed), he makes this face:

Does that really look like someone who believes redemption may be possible? But for further establishment of just how little Angel believes redemption is possible, Angel also laughs them off and calls their goal "lame."

The only reason Angel agrees to Charlie and Vaggie's proposition is because it is a rent free place to stay. He admits as much just a bit further into the comic. By the end, Angel says "Redemption, it's silly. Huh, Nuggs."

The tone we are led to believe he uses is one of contemplation and relief. Relief due likely to the fact that there is some light at the end of the tunnel to the shit situation he was in.

This is just comic evidence, of course. If we go to the pilot, when Angel is engaging in the turf war with Cherri Bomb, he explains that he is using Charlie and Vaggie for free rent. Further exemplified when he later asks if participating in the turf war meant he didn't have a free room anymore. But also in his conversation with Cherri, he also admits that he is still taking some drugs behind Charlie and Vaggie's back. Something that we see immediately toward the opening of the pilot when Angel buys a bag of Angel Dust.

Character Dynamic

I cannot emphasize this enough, the Hunicast is NOT a good exemplifier for character dynamics. Every single "character interaction" is based on fanon, not canon, and they are prompted by the fans themselves. Only Viv really knows exactly how Angel and Alastor would canonically interact. It is no better a source for character dynamic than the wiki is for accurate information. IE, some things may hold true, but the majority of it is not and it is better just to wait until it is confirmed canon.

Moving on...

There is a lot of focus on Valentino as a main antagonist, based entirely too much on the hope that Angel will be the main protagonist. And this is really just disingenuous when you consider there are two other implied Overlords, as well as several other sources of strife within the world of Hazbin Hotel.

An Antagonist is someone working against the protagonist to prevent them from achieving their goal. Alastor would not meet this criteria, as he is a self-professed observer and conflict creator. But he is not a main antagonist. Someone working against the goal of redemption could be anyone from the Overlords (which, far as we know, would include Valentino), Lucifer, or even Heaven itself.

Where antagonists come into play, quoting Masterlist once again, I think these two types of antagonists were overlooked:

A conflict-creator. An antagonist doesn’t have to be a “bad guy.” Sometimes, they’re just a character whose goals are in direct conflict with the protagonist’s, like Mr. Darcy in Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice or Javert working to arrest Valjean in Victor Hugo’s Les Miserables.

The protagonist themselves. The main source of conflict in a story can be from within the protagonist themselves—their shortcomings or insecurities are keeping them from reaching their goal. A prime example of this is Holden Caulfield in J.D. Salinger’s The Catcher in the Rye. While Holden comes into conflict with many characters in the novel, the ever-present antagonizing conflict comes from his own obsessions and insecurities.

Now, why did I bring up these two types? Well! I'm glad you asked! You see, where conflict-creator comes into play would line up more with Alastor. He isn't really the bad guy, but he does create some friction where his goals meet with Charlie's. He is a professed observer, but it is strongly believed that there is something else, another goal, that he has omitted.

As for the Protagonist themselves, this lines up pretty strongly where Charlie is concerned. You could argue that it does for Angel too, but Angel's goal, as mentioned before, is not Redemption. That goal is Charlie's, and hers alone. Yet it is her naivety, inexperience, and insecurities surrounding her failures as a princess that are holding her back from achieving her goal. Going by this, not only do we have multiple protagonists, but we also have multiple antagonists.

"So far, no one else's past is wrought with tension like Angel Dust's."

Even if this wasn't a sweeping, dismissive statement made with limited information, it would still be incorrect. Why? Because each and every character in Hazbin Hotel is going to have their own story to tell. Stories that will each be as relatable and wrought with tension, the only reason we know Angel so extensively is because Viv put the most work into him. She has admitted that Alastor and Angel were characters she wrote based on past dealings and experiences she had. Let those implications sink in a bit.

Now, to further this, people don't need to empathize with a character to like them. They can sympathize as well, even if they personally cannot relate to the emotions the character is feeling.

And where Angel is concerned, he is not addicted to drugs. Angel has used drugs to escape the pain of his trauma. His response in the pilot to having his drugs stolen from him is not one of a typical addict. Which leads us to believe the drugs are simply a coping mechanism more than they are an addiction.

Real Audience for Hazbin is 12 to 16

I would really fucking hope you are joking. I'm gonna go out on a limb here and guess that this was said by someone who isn't a parent. While yes, kids will be sneaky and watch or play things they're not supposed to, a show with drug use/abuse, rape, sex, physical/mental/emotional abuse, and suicide is as much for them as Rick and Morty.

Further, it is not just these themes that make the show for adults. It is the format of the storytelling. Yes, you can complain about what you consider issues with the pilot. But at the end of the day, it did it's job. It established the story premise, introduced important characters (Fat Nuggets does not fall in that category, calm down), gave a basic understanding of their relationships to each other, and get the audience interested in continuing the series. Considering the views for the pilot and the resulting disproportionate growth of the fandom, I would say it did that in spades.

Hazbin Hotel is not Steven Universe. I cannot say this enough times, and the reason I cannot is because I cannot tell you how many times I have come into contact with the underage side of the fandom griping about lack of lore, griping about lack of production information, and overall being exceedingly impatient. At the risk of sounding like an old miser, the underage side of the fandom has never had to wait for additions to a series. Like waiting for Homestuck updates, or the new release of a Harry Potter novel. They have had a steady schedule of content, along with shows that give exposition dumps "in the first 3 minutes."

So don't look at Hazbin Hotel through the lens of kids' show fandoms. It has so much more to offer than that.

Alastor vs Valentino

No, this is not about whether Alastor could beat up Valentino. In the video, DireGentleman pulled a huge pet peeve of mine and lumped Valentino and Alastor together, labeling them both "monsters." Which is opening a huge can of worms for me. So, I will give a brief summary of why that is wrong, and provide a link to one of my other posts for deeper diving.

So, there is a reason why Valentino is more hated than Alastor is. Lumping them together is a mistake.

Valentino is a pimp that abuses and manipulates his victims through intimidation and (implied through) some kind of addiction to the red smoke (whether that is real or symbolism is yet unknown). He takes who and what he wants, be damned the consequences or who gets hurt. He is incredibly self-serving, with no consideration for anyone else. He uses people like pawns, and when those pawns refuse to do what he wants, what does he do? He forces them to do it anyway.

By comparison, while Alastor may use his people like pawns, he also has more consideration for them and doesn't abuse them (far as we can tell). The evidence to support this is the attitude of those serving under Valentino vs those under Alastor. Niffty and Husk both seem to not have a problem with Alastor, and where Husk is concerned it seems that his attitude toward Alastor is their typical banter. But definitely nothing that displays abuse. In fact, when Husker is hesitant or even refusing to do as Alastor asks, Alastor doesn't force Husker. He offers payment in the form of something Husker genuinely likes.

Now, while some might argue this is also manipulating through addiction, one could look at it this way. However, Alastor didn't make Husker an alcoholic. That was Husker's vice to begin with, Alastor simply has no intention of fixing it. After all, Alastor has said he doesn't think anything can change a sinner.

For further explanation and delving into Alastor, click here.

Parents don't 'get' Charlie = Disney Princess

Once again, we fall upon the slippery slope of disinformed statements. While the joke was made that the princess of hell expresses herself best through song, parent issues do not equate to being something that is relatable primarily or only to kids and teens. It's kind of offensive that there is a sort or implication in this statement that adults don't have issues like insecurities surrounding their own failures, or parent issues like what Charlie has or worse. And once again, we fall into the empathize vs sympathize realm and I once again will say that the audience does not need to empathize with the protagonist to make them a good protagonist.

Charlie is a failed princess, her people don't respect her and didn't even prior to her hotel announcement. Yes, she is sheltered and naive. Likely due to how little she was able or allowed to interact with sinners. After all, her ex-boyfriend was from another hellborn family. One that, from what we can surmise, interacts rather frequently with the Magne family.

And it is because of this naivety and inexperience that her method to redeem sinners will not work.

In the video, DireGentleman states that we can pretty much assume that Charlie's redemption methods will work. But her methods, as we see in her song, is to inject demons with meds and take away/burn their vices. She is seeking immediate resolutions to problems that require therapy and a long process that should be making sinners want to change. All Charlie is currently accomplishing is earning the ire and scrutiny of her people. This is why I previously mentioned that Charlie is both protagonist and antagonist, as she is getting in her own way to accomplishing the goal of redemption. And this is where we find that Charlie meets the "starts out being wrong" requirement mentioned in the video as well as "admiring a character for trying."

Charlie is also in a perfect position to be the tour guide for us, the audience, as we observe the metamorphosis of every demon who needs to be redeemed. She is, once again, surrounded by those who need to be redeemed which means we will witness every character arc. This includes Angel, who does not need to be the central focus for us to witness his story.

Finally...

It was stated, or at least implied, that Hazbin Hotel's pilot is no longer relevant. This is a statement that pretty much leaves me puzzled. The only way it would be irrelevant is if Hazbin went in a completely different direction, and we have no reason to believe it will. Vivziepop is still creative director for Hazbin Hotel, and A24 is notorious for giving creators their creative freedom. What A24 is doing is animating, making VA regulations, and ensuring there is an air tight lid kept on the project. Especially given it's popularity in such a short amount of time.

Contrary to what DireGentleman said, Hazbin Hotel will definitely live up to it's hype. Being picked up by A24 will not compromise the show simply because it's not in the same realm of indie production that Helluva Boss is. And it's a bit unfair to Vivziepop to imply as much.

In Conclusion...

Please do a bit more digging in regards to not only the show, but everything surrounding it. Don't lump fanon and canon together and expect them to be equal sources, and please do not claim an obviously adult-audience show is more fit for children and teens.

And lastly, please do more digging to better understand media and storytelling. Reading books is great, but what you were using as the foundation for your arguments were far too simplified and vague,, given the complexity of the protagonist and antagonist roles. Overall, the video just came across as one huge helping of Angel Dust bias with a side of strong dislike for Charlie.

[ddaenghoney]

chapter seventeen

masterlist link in blog description.

As a successful songwriter, you want nothing more than the acknowledgment that the chart-topping musical pieces are your own creations. But contracts, relationships, and the difficulty of facing the stakes involved head on, keep your mouth shut until pressure builds too much.

Pairing(s): Park Jimin x Y/N, Min Yoongi x Y/N

disclaimer: any characters depicted do not represent the actual personality of the respected idol in real life.

Series warning(s)/genre(s): Chapter-based written fic, Slow-burn relationship(s), Fake-dating, Unrequited love, Songwriter/producer!oc, idol!Jimin, idol/songwriter/producer!Yoongi, friends with benefits, drama, romance, smut, angst, fluff (updated as needed)

Chapter warning(s): quite a bit of unsettling/paranoia themes around the middle of the chapter (again in regards to stalking from fans). Also, some making out that alludes to more after it ! 

Word count: 5481

if you enjoy please, please let me know!

Headlines of multiple news sites, trending hashtags, and seemingly hundreds of threads in online forums center around the topic that goes viral the day after. With SoundWave wasting no time to act subtly, choosing to take a blunt rebuttal of the independent release of music, they announce a separation of SUGA from the label. Without offering much other than the central reasoning in the official statement attributing a lack of loyalty, and openly rebellious attitude in the way of involving his personal relationships into his music without consent of the company, Yoongi’s public reputation takes a giant strike.

The primary attitude of his fanbase is startled confusion, as is similarly the feelings of pop culture commenters, who all agree that this action made by SoundCloud seems incredibly rash considering how high of status the title SUGA has in the music industry. A threshold of rumors contaminate social websites, all trying to gauge underlying motivations for the company’s decision to completely drop Min Yoongi from the label, feeling like there has to be more words each side could make but holds back.

With slowly passing weeks of conversation stirring faster from the sensationalized wonder that accumulates in the silence of both involved parties, fandoms grow impatient. A future tour scheduled to begin early next year is obviously squashed, and the subtle hints of new music thrown far from any burner of focus. Worry holds a multitude of loyal fans who are eager for clarification from their favorite idol, but no answers are clearly given. Blurry images of Yoongi to and from SoundWave only serve to prove that there are talks going on, especially when sightings of him and Taehyung begin growing consistent as well as thought to be moving vans relocating assumed sound equipment.

Naturally, frustration builds. Latching in tight grips onto every instance your name or image appears on the internet, angry shouts question your involvement with this entire ordeal. Confused as people are, they have little doubt that you deserve the bulk of blame for this dissent between Yoongi and SoundWave. After all, everything had always seemed steady in growth for SUGA’s career before your public involvement with him.

You realize this isn’t true. So much of the situation still lingers in the darkness, far from cameras and microphones to state the severity of everything that led the sequence of events to this point. You know that this whole problem isn’t entirely your fault, but it feels like it. Words cling to your psyche every time you try to peruse even the filtered social media feed of those you follow on instagram, but the comments still remain and grow on every one of your own posts, making you delete the app after only three days into the chaotic situation.

Apologies become common, though usually squashed within your reply to whenever Yoongi tells you them. Worry brims in his eyes just as well as his chest every time he notices anything off in your expressions that relate to all of the responses online. You’re quick to state that this isn’t his fault either, and not to worry about the silence he’s forced to keep while legal affairs are being handled. You’ve already settled yourself with the high chance that he won’t ever be able to make a statement that gives out the picture, just like you won’t ever be able to without losing every royalty you have.

While the online response does burn on your nerves, you can calm yourself by remembering it will eventually blow over to a new topic. It could take a lot of time, but eventually you’ll be able to not be the villain in every assumed narration of Yoongi being fired from SoundWave. Instead, concern wraps around any thoughts you have towards a new job.

With your work history visibly clean of any ink on your resume, you don’t have much to say to combat the fact. And as such you simply use your degree as well as projects from when you were a college student to talk yourself up. But you aren’t naive-- you realize that the gap of time from you receiving your diploma to the current date unease potential employers.

At this point, you’re no longer surprised. The man sitting across from you sits tapping his pen on papers in front of him. They’re spread in a controlled mess on a folder you brought. His eyes scan the words over, but because of the minute hand on the clock behind him reaching a new number, you’re inclined to believe the silence so far isn’t favorable.

Answering the initial questions isn’t usually difficult. In fact, you believe you win over a few uncertain glances in the way you speak with experience, but any opinion gained usually diminishes at the skinny portfolio you present. Every time you’ve passed it, you also feel underwhelmed by the humble sight of it, garnering none of the weight you should have the thin wings filled with. All of that is within your mind.

All of the tension in your mind fills more and more, contemplating what there is to take away from your meager showings of visible experience. This tension comes to a throbbing disappointment when the majority of those who have looked at the portfolio mention Yoongi’s name under their breath.

A large part of you becomes increasingly defensive from these tiny comments. Controlling your mouth from blurting questions in reply to their intentions is a difficult task, especially when the issues have been consistent. Multiple misinterpretations veil over the actual situation underneath the media’s depictions and what your residual contractual obligations to SoundWave will let you fix.

The man’s eyebrows furrow, his head tilting as something he sees perplexes him. You don’t openly react, simply sitting in the chair, legs not particularly tensely poised on the floor and your back only erect enough to be formal. Posture forgot a few interviews ago in favor of knowing glances at the employers body languages when reading through. This subtle confused realization on his face is familiar, but you smile politely as he gets up stating he needs to step out for a moment. As though he’s the first one to go ask questions about you to other people.

Walking into the lobby from the small meeting room, you do little more than sigh, reaching to rub your shoulder as you contemplate your next action. The man’s voice when he came back to the room and stated you’ll get contact in the future if they’d like to explore job opportunities was entirely monotone, and you can’t even be offended by the fact at this point.

Still, reality weighs on your shoulders, growing uncomfortably nagging, and at quickening paces when televisions like the one hanging on the opposite wall post pop news stations with Yoongi’s pictures and titles of dissention between himself and SoundWave.

“Oh,” A voice from the side disrupts the settling glare in your eyes. Softening your expression to one of surprise you turn your head as a figure comes to you. A smile on her face that seems disingenuous, but fitting when matched with the consistent brand name on each article of clothing apparent. “It was Y/N, right?”

In the medley of companies you set out to try landing jobs at, you didn’t take into consideration their current idols. More interested in just getting a place to continue working. But as Seulgi approached you from the way of the elevators, there’s a piece inside of you somewhat glad you’re likely to be rejected from this one. “Yeah.”

��What a coincidence to run into you here.” She says as she places her phone in her handbag. “Looking for work? Heard that you’ve taken a chance at the music production world.”

For the sake of pleasantry, you don’t irritably sigh from having to deal with this immediately following an unsatisfying industry. Instead just shrug your shoulder, “Something like that.”

“Guess it hasn’t been going well,” You’re unable to stop your eyebrows from narrowing at her, but Seulgi is unhindered from your evidently growing annoyance. “It’s a hard thing getting through scandals, especially when you don’t have anything to show for yourself.”

“Such a hard thing that you didn’t mind shoving your boyfriend into it.” You roll your eyes, head shaking as you start to walk away.

“Well, actually,” She catches up to your pace, overlapping you to cut off your trec to the front doors. “That’s what I wanted to talk to you about. Hoseok could use a hand, right? If you want to try to get some work, why not ask him? Independent work is good to help build a resume-- though, I guess Hoseok’s reputation and Yoongi’s current one don’t make companies feel comfortable-”

“What are you trying for here?” Your tone causes a falter of expression in Seulgi’s face, shifting it into a muted shock. Her smile replaces itself with pursing lips, then eventually the picturesque way she poses her shoulders also deflates. Appearing much less superficial, though now openly tired with frustration from the little act she tried to play with you.

“What? I can’t try and do a nice thing for my ex?”

“Ex that you threw under the bus.” Unhesitant. You cross your arms. “Why in the world would I think you’re not trying to gain something right now too?”

“You’re just like Yoongi--I get the relationship now.” She sighs, playing with her hair as her eyes trail off to nowhere. “Well, the relationship you ended up getting yourself after all.”

Your arms tense over your front, quietly startled that she seems aware of the false beginning with your relationship with Yoongi, and even acknowledging that it’s currently real. Part of you wants to question how she’s found out the tidbit of information, though it’s not a top concern of yours. The small fact that she has methods to get information throughout the industry is odd, but you doubt it needs to be a worrisome issue.

“Anyways, I was just offering a suggestion. Three songs aren’t going to cut it to get top companies like this one to let you in.” As if you needed her to say that when the past week has only been proof of that. Seulgi adjusts the hoodie she wears so that it no longer falls off a shoulder, and her eyes appear introspective for the moment of silence before speaking again. “You’re not going to get anywhere without stepping on a few people along the way. You can’t play along with all the rules and expect to succeed.”

If her tone remained snarky, you would have shot a comment in return, as the instant thought in your brain relates Seulgi’s words to her actions against Hoseok in the past. However, the simplistic way she spoke was calm, almost bordering into a somber timbre hidden beneath the surface. At that moment you feel like you see something inside of that shadow, but you don’t have the liberty of pondering it.

“Seulgi, I thought you were using the big dance studio right now.” A voice enters into the conversation, making Seulgi’s head turn back towards the entrance. Looking beyond her, you see a face you again would have expected if you took any consideration to the companies you were skipping through for interviews. “Oh,” Jeongguk’s eyes widen, catching sight of you, a smile forming as he speaks on in happy surprise, “Y/N! It’s been a while since I’ve seen you.”

“Hi, Jeongguk.” You give a little smile and nod as a greeting.

“Yeah, I’m late.” Seulgi speaks up while she takes a step to begin a smooth leave, eyeing Jeongguk then you in curiosity of how there’s a mutual connection. But her final words have nothing to do with questions. “Sorry about that whole thing at my party, by the way. Taking your date and all. Just getting a conversation Yoongi owed me.”

Her vague insinuation makes your eyes narrow, following her figure as she casually goes. Already knowing the content of the conversation she had with Yoongi, you’re left to assume that she speaks in a way to ingrain seeds of uncertainty or jealousy under your skin, but all the needless comment does is further you from any positive opinions of Seulgi.

“Something about that seemed hostile.” Jeongguk states as the two of you watch Seulgi disappear down a hall. Instead of screaming out intelligibly from the frustration of your day so far, you just exhale a long sigh, turning your head back towards Jeongguk. His mouth curls into a slightly uneasy smile, not sure of what he just stumbled in on, “Everything okay?”

“I can’t wait to go home and sleep, to be honest with you.” You admit, trying to get humor into your voice, but you’re sure your expression betrays any chance of a joking ambiance as Jeongguk slowly nods bouncing his long locks of soft, warm-toned pink. “Your band is going to be performing at the river festival this weekend, right? Saw online.”

“Yeah, we have a set in the late evening. You going?” His demeanor is wholly casual, pronounced further in the relaxation of his shoulders and lazily situated hands in the pockets of his big hoodie.

“I would, but now’s not really the best time for me to be doing much out.” You smile as your eyebrows furrow a bit. For a moment you consider the fact that he may not know anything, as you recall him not being one to peruse comment sections of social media sites. But as Jeongguk’s lips cast into a frown, he recalls the news your words refer to,

“Oh, right; I heard about that all.” He bites his lip, while removing a hand from the confines of his pocket to push back hair from his face. “Actually, I’ve been out of the country with my group for almost six months now, and, it’s not really my place to ask, but have you been okay since,” He pauses, quickly taking a scan around the area like others may be listening in. “Well, you know.”

You nod your head, understanding that he means to inquire about your state of mind since breaking things off from Jimin at the beginning of the year. “For awhile I really wasn’t,” You admit, but find yourself able to smile as you continue on with full assurance, “But I’m more than okay now. My career may be sort of crazy, but I have people that care about me, so I’m fairing a lot better than I would’ve ever thought.”

“That’s good.” Jeongguk smiles, and parts of you are sure that perhaps he’s even the smallest bit sad that there isn’t hesitation in your voice because his friendship with Jimin would likely root for the fact. But he’s not unfair in that regard, always having been a supportive, close friend of Jimin, but not to the extent of harboring ill sentiment about things like this. “If you’re looking for song writing work just let me know; my band liked the three tracks you and Yoongi released, and I always thought it’d be cool to work with you on lyrics anyways.”

“What?” You blurt in surprise, eyes widening from the easygoing proposition, “Wait, really?”

“Yeah,” Jeongguk grins in return, wondering silently if the offer is odd because of your reaction. “I mean, why not, right?”

“Even if I’m not an employee here?” You question, still in disbelief at how simply he’d asked for even bits of collaborative work in the future. Where you have been learning to anticipate a lot of hesitation, and even flat out refusal from all of your interviews so far, Jeongguk breaks the cycle out of nowhere. Perhaps you should not be as excited from the simple prospect as you are, but you’re unable to stop yourself from the little success making you vibrant with joy.

“You don’t need to be an employee of any company, Y/N, your skills already speak for themselves to me.”

When you step outside of the building, Jeongguk’s words remain at the forefront of your mind. You type a location on the map digitally showing on your phone screen, unconsciously setting up a call for a taxi, but you think only of the small piece of hope given to you from the offer. The more you consider it, you believe there exists a deeper lesson from that small interaction. It’s like he said to you; the company isn’t as important as your own skills.

You bite your lip, thinking of any contacts made throughout the years. Frankly, not many people beyond SoundWave met you because of your job, but there were still some small acquaintances you’ve gained. Some friends as well, though fewer than you could count with your fingers perhaps. It’s unlikely many would jump at the opportunity to work with you in light of the current news, but perhaps there’s something to consider down that avenue.

Your spine tightens slightly, and suddenly you feel overly aware of the area around you. You lift your eyes from your phone screen to across the street beyond cars going along to wherever. People walk normally as the beginnings of evening traffic occur as they would any day of the business week. With a small shake of your head, you ignore the suspicion in your nerves, letting yourself check notifications on your phone instead as the taxi descends towards you from a few blocks away.

Alerting Yoongi that you’re going to head to his apartment to help him move around items delivered from the company, you eventually press the lock on your phone screen and turn your attention down the road to see if you can spot your taxi’s license. In the same direction is the stairwell into a subway station with its constant flood of people in and out that never remain in the area longer than it takes them to walk. But perched with their elbows on railings overlooking the descent into the subway is a small group of three similar in age to the ones assumed to follow you to Namjoon’s cafe.

Your eyes linger on their figures for a noticeable amount of time, and you don’t believe them to care that they’ve been spotted. You bite your inner cheek, and look back to the taxi app for the time of arrival. Your stomach knots, but you try not to focus on it, because of this occurrence being more regular in the past couple of weeks. If you kept your mouth shut and thoughts from roaming frantically, it would be over just as soon as you stepped into the taxi.

A bump on your shoulder startles you, shaking your heart around in the ribcage, as your throat assumes the worst by trapping air. A businessperson continues along, however, simply going up the road as they chatter away on their phone, completely unaware of the tiny collision. You swallow the air back down, squeezing your phone tightly as it vibrates a tiny series of beats to signify the taxi is soon to arrive.

As you look on at the back of the random person, you notice more eyes in your direction. These ones from a college-age duo, you think. But they’re clearly focused on you, walking on the sidewalk in your direction. Your leg muscle tightens, becoming highly alert of the phone’s they have clutched close to their chests with the camera lenses evident.

The abrupt stop of brakes in front of you brings you back to your current position as does a quick honk from a car bothered by the stop of your taxi as it drives around. Without hesitation you enter inside, stating an affirmative as the driver asks if you were the one with the given destination on his GPS. You can’t contain the sigh of relief flooding out of your lungs as he merges into the flow of traffic and away from the individuals whose walk stopped to stare at the leave of the taxi.

You have high doubts that if the people were truly fans that they would berate you or angrily yell, but nonetheless you didn’t want the onslaught of questions they more likely had prepared to be said in civil voices. You already had the displeasure of weaning along a forceful and awkward conversation on a subway train days earlier. Leading you to start avoiding that means of transportation entirely now.

Arriving at Yoongi’s front door, your finger presses to ring the bell. Listening to the muted sound on the inside you feel your shoulders jumping ever so slightly at the sound, but you shake your head to rid away the sensitivity. Really no one had been belligerent towards you, you were overthinking any of the things that could have happened. Another twitch in your shoulders induces with the knob twisting and with it the door opens to reveal Hoseok whose face eventually slips into a pout,

“Wow, don’t look so disappointed.” He teases you as you roll your eyes and walk inside. “You should be thanking me since I did most of the heavy lifting before you got here.”

“Thanks,” You smile at him in an overly polite manner that causes Hoseok to scoff and shake his head in amusement. “I’m sure you were more than willing to since Yoongi offered to get you a fancy dinner as payment-”

“Wait, don’t tell him that; I was going to avoid it.” You turn towards the way of the bedrooms as Yoongi walks into the living area from it, hair tousled from moving furniture and a loose t-shirt hanging off his shoulders comfortably. You watch him grin as Hoseok shouts an irritated rebuttle about Yoongi’s deflection of payment for helping. As Yoongi comes to a stop a mere couple of feet from you his eyes look towards you and before you know it the teeth peeking from his joke drift away while his brows furrowed with concern, “Angel, what’s wrong?”

You shake your head, trying to disburse the worry in your shoulders that you apparently had not been successful to not think about. Wordlessly Yoongi steps closer, initiating a hug that you finish by clinging your arms around his torso.

Hoseok frowns in confusion since you had seemed fine when he opened the door, but glancing up at Yoongi whose eyes are just as unsure of the problem Hoseok decides it’s probably the result of some kind of build up. “‘m going to get that last box unpacked.”

“Thanks.” Yoongi says as his hands rub trails on your back, waiting for Hoseok to leave the room before speaking up again, “Baby, do you want to talk about it?”

“No, I’m just overthinking something.” You mumble against the cotton soaked in the familiar scent of laundry detergent. With a small sigh you adjust yourself to look up towards Yoongi whose attentive gaze meets yours. Gently he presses a small kiss against your forehead, settling his hands on your sides to give a little comforting squeeze.

“Was it more people following you around?”

“Yeah,” You hide your face against his chest again as you put the problem in the air. “It really, really wasn’t anything much. I just want a hug. It’s been a long day because of the whole job interview session parade I went on too.”

“I can do hugs,” Yoongi nods before perching his chin atop your head. The moment lingers on, granting a warming comfort as you remain encapsulated in Yoongi’s arms. But he can’t help a final, quiet question that is likely the reason for the rate of his heartbeat in your ear. “Did anyone do anything to you, angel?”

“No.” You squeeze your arms around him. “I doubt any of them really would. They probably just want to get information. It’s just uncomfortable.”

“Yeah, it is.” Yoongi’s chest fills from the breath of an inhale as he thinks of all the other instances since news of him being let go from SoundWave released. “I’m sorry, angel, once all the paperwork is done, I’ll try and figure out something to say to the press about everything.”

“It’s okay, Yoon.” You pull away to press a pecking kiss against his lips. He notes your expression to be considerably calmer than minutes earlier. “Really, it’s okay. It’s not your fault anyways. But besides that all, I do have some good news.”

“Oh, yeah?” He keeps his hands on your waist while your arms drop from their gentle encapture of his frame. Your quick nod matching the beginnings of a smile on your lips give Yoongi more cheerfulness as well, “Tell me then, sweetie.”

“I saw Jeongguk earlier and he said he’d be willing to work on songwriting together sometime.” You explain, allowing the excitement you felt then to take over the bulk of your tone. Inquisitively Yoongi’s head tilts,

“Jeon Jeongguk? Where did you see him at?”

“His company after I got interviewed--oh, right, I don’t think I’ve mentioned to you I know him.” You ramble along earning a chuckle from Yoongi as he nods to that fact as well. “Well, I met him through Jimin a couple of years ago, but he’s really nice. It was just an innocent offer on his part.”

“Yeah, I believe that-- he’s really easygoing.” Yoongi nods, turning his head to the hallway as yours looks in the same direction at the sound of Hoseok cursing as he hops on one foot into view while his other foot stays clenched between his two hands.

“I hit my toe on the corner of the door into the room-” He says with a wincing voice, “Didn’t mean to interrupt the emotional fest-- it just really hurt, and I think I should be owed more than just a fancy dinner because of it-”

“If it keeps you from suing me.” Yoongi shakes his head and refrains from laughter like the kind leaving your mouth as you listen to their conversation. Yoongi goes back to resting his head on yours, this time pressing his cheek on top of your scalp when you hug him once more. “But I’m picking the place to eat at.”

“That doesn’t even make sense if it’s supposed to be a payment to me.” Hoseok scoffs as he dramatically hobbles to the couch where he collapses himself onto it. “Y/N, if you asked your best friend to help you move your heavy equipment and this same friend stubs his toe doing it-- and this best friend and you are also getting into a partnership, would you just give him a dinner as payment?”

“Partnership?” You repeat as your eyes narrow, honing in on the one word that slipped into Hoseok’s monologue. “And no I’d buy my friend at least a house.”

“See!”

“A house,” Yoongi murmurs through pouting lips as Hoseok claps his hands to your method of penance. “He already has a nicer apartment than mine-”

“Wait, what did you mean about a partnership, Hoseok?” You ask, poking Yoongi’s stomach to get him to quiet from the tickling sensation. Hoseok actively twiddles his thumbs instead of a verbal. He glances towards Yoongi who responds to his antics with a sigh as he tugs himself off the comfort of hugging you.

“He and I were thinking we’d start our own label.”

“What!” Your eyes grow wide glancing towards Hoseok then back to Yoongi. “Your own music label? Like an idol company too?”

“Well, yeah.” Yoongi says without a lot of conviction as he shrugs his shoulders. “I don’t know how many people would actually want to become an idol through us, but at least for Hoseok and I it would be a good way to keep doing music. And on our own terms.”

You stand looking at him awestruck, not at all anticipating the two of them to come to this type of business plan for the future. Frankly, you weren’t sure at all what Yoongi intended to do without SoundWave, but you would have sooner assumed he would simply relocate to another company. The requests for him to do so would no doubt flock after a month or two of the current news becoming history.

“Hey,” Hoseok gets up from the couch, phone in hand as the two of you look over to him. “I’m meeting a friend in a while, so I’ll get out of here. Don’t forget that you owe me a really fancy meal-”

“I get it, I won’t.” Yoongi rolls his eyes as he follows Hoseok towards the front door to see him off. You simply watch, still in a stupor from their casual way of telling you that their idea is to create their own fucking company. You wave at Hoseok as he shouts out a goodbye to you and walks out the door. Yoongi turns towards you as it shuts with an electronic click, finding you still baffled by the news. He rubs the back of his neck as he returns towards you. “We sound crazy?”

“No,” You shake your head and let it tilt as your imagination takes over to see an outcome where the two of them operate a successful idol company. With their production skills and overall talent with music, it didn’t seem far fetched that they at least make a small company that runs well. “I think you both should do it.”

Yoongi smiles gently at the hopeful gleam in your eyes. His hand falls from toying with the small hairs on the back of his neck to find itself entangling your own appendage with a delicate hold. “You’re free to do anything you want, angel, but I was thinking--and Hoseok agreed-- that you could join us and be a producer if we make a company.”

“Me?” Your voice barely mumbles the response, eyes struck wide in surprise at his offer.

“You don’t have to at all--I really understand if you don’t want to take the risk of it instead of finding a place that’s already settled, but,” Yoongi bites his lip, fiddling with your hand as he holds it. He finds your eyes as he sweetly smiles “It can be an option for you.”

With the two happy surprises of the day swimming in your chest, you stand in a stunned quiet as you take them in. For Yoongi and Hoseok, despite their respective scandals, you don’t have any doubt that they could definitely make something out of this idea for themselves. Especially happy about Yoongi being able to do as he wants for himself if they start a company. He’d be completely in control of his representation in the way that he hasn’t had ever since his debut.

And his offer gives the same freedom for yourself to create songs like you’d always wanted as well.

“Of course, I’m sure there’s a lot we have to do to get everything going, so really don’t feel bad about saying no-”

Interrupting his sentence by pressing your lips onto his chattering mouth, You let your arms wrap around his neck, silently grateful for Yoongi's hands steadying the two of you by finding a firm grip on your hips. “I say yes.”

Anticipation and excitement ricochets throughout your chest, exuding outwardly in your smile that you find Yoongi quickly returning with a growing grin. Running his hips in lips trails along your sides, he keeps silent in favor of kissing you again, practically bruising your lips with his own. Your hands mesh into soft locks of black hair, keeping Yoongi held in place as the kiss deepens into an oxygen depriving attachment.

Allowing time for air only when your mouth gasps as Yoongi’s hands find your backside and with a squeeze pulls your waist against his own, your eyes open along with his as you both take in quick sips of air, momentarily frozen from continuing action. Yoongi’s jaw clenches shut as you very obviously allow your hips to grind friction. He watches the beginnings of a smirk take over your expression, and stops the teasing attitude to dip his lips down to your neck.

There his trails tiny molten kisses along the skin, searching until your fingertips curl against his scalp and a small whimper casts out of your mouth. Attaching to the spot, his mouth blisters in a garden meant to flourish red and purple by next sunrise, and his hands continue to press into your ass riding up the fabric of your skirt as a moan escapes your lips, “Yoongi-”

“Do you want me to stop, angel?” He asks with a rough timbre the contrasts the soft ministrations he trails from the love bite to reach your mouth once more. Kissing the outline of your jaw, he hums against the skin waiting for your reply which comes as your hands remove from his hair to cup his face and bring his lips back to yours,

“Not at all.”

if you enjoy please, please let me know via ask, comment, rb with tags– however ! i’d just really appreciate feedback 🥺 i hope you enjoy the series, i’m working really hard on it! : )

also yes ik this chapter cuts off right before the smut lsjkdfkfdghg it’s also not going to be continued into the next chapter sO lkjdsffgdsfjkfg if it’s something you’d like to read as a blurb on its own lmk while commenting on this chapter hehe shameless incentive and i’ll try to write it as an additive piece to the story!

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