#also this is so funny

[unexplained-events]

FYI Zio is an extremely disrespectful term to use

I can't stress this enough, but when I use the term Zio, I mean it in the absolute most disrespectful way possible

[skydaemon]

chilchuck you bitch i love you

[themilfking]

You're mutuals with somebody who genuinely wants to murder and cannibalize people and has stated so on multiple occasions. You disgust me.

Lmaooo what!?

Alright which one of you is it?

[imminent-danger-came]

confession: back in like 2020-2021, somewhere around there, one of my twitter mutuals was really into lmk and kept posting about it to the point that my tl was flooded with it, and i just scrolled past after realizing mk was not in fact kai from ninjago (they look really similar ok). and now i’m sorely regretting that bc i could’ve been insane about this show TWO-THREE YEARS AGO. crying in the club

I'm so sorry for your loss

[jinxxed-vexx]

My infamy travels past the reaches of Twitter. >:)

Also for anyone wondering the lore of my name...it's from this meme.

I just thought it was the funniest shit I'd ever seen like three years ago and I haven't changed it since.

[thefuturewithoutus]

guy who was born too late and also in the wrong universe to rock 1970s fashion

[astrumocs]

bravery for jules as well. it'd be funny,

Ah yes, the thing he's known for: Bravery--

My muse would …

[X] Spend the night in a haunted building [ ] Go into a burning/collapsing building to save someone [ ] Take a shortcut through a dark alleyway  [ ] Stay calm with a weapon pointed at them [ ] Be confident defending themselves from an attack [ ] Touch a dangerous exotic animal [ ] Take someone else’s punishment to protect them [ ] Travel to an unknown place by themselves [ ] Spend a night in the woods alone [X] Witness a seance [X] Play a scary video game in the dark alone [ ] Explore a pitch-black catacomb with only one light [~] Contact the spirit of someone they once knew [ ] Spend the night in a cemetery [X] Sit in a room with one hundred creepy dolls [ ] Hang their feet over the edge of a tall building [ ] Swim in dark, murky waters without being able to touch the bottom [ ] Use or accept a powerful magic spell [X] Be covered in spiders, snakes, or other insects [ ] Go looking for the source of a mysterious sound late at night [ ] Spend an hour sealed up in a coffin [ ] Go sailing miles from shore without any communication [ ] Use a Ouija board [ ] Go diving in a dark, underwater cave [ ] Climb through a long tunnel just big enough to fit through [ ] Explore a spot where cult rituals were performed [ ] Go walking late at night, alone [ ] Spend the night in a home where someone was murdered [X] Go surfing on the Dark Web [X] Play an urban legend game (bloody mary, the midnight man, etc…) [X] Stay home alone with a suspected killer on the loose [ ] Climb a dangerous mountain where many others have died on their way to the top [~] Explore ancient ruins where strange things have happened [ ] Touch a supposedly cursed object [ ] Check out a creepy cellar or attic [ ] Cross an unstable bridge over a huge drop [ ] Pick up a hitchhiker in the middle of the night

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Knowledge Revenge.

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

[chessb0r3d]

Analysis so bad you don't even know what it's talking about anymore.

[a-delish-cupofjo]

@theribthatgrewback

here it is, the funniest most absurd line spoken in all of kingdom hearts 

[shesmore-shoebill]

"I had choice paralysis :(" is a KILLER line.

He's such a comedic powerhouse, I'm glad more people are getting exposed to him :'D

[inkskinned]

she's singing in another room and my dog is asleep at my feet. my grandma asked me why i haven't found a man yet and i laughed. oh, you know. i like my house clean.

my girlfriend is also my man is also "my partner" if i'm in a professional setting. yesterday we went to a ren faire and a man mimed at me - you're together? and at my delighted nod, his baffled, you're gay? made me laugh. a woman with rainbow hair said i love the two of you together. you're both so beautiful it's absurd.

my dad introduced my partner as my "..... friend. or whatever" the other day. he knows we're dating. in the same way, i was never able to get my sister's husband to stop saying that's gay like it's 2008. he still uses the word fa***t, and my sister's defense of him has always been well, he's just kidding.

my lover and i dance to old music in a tiny kitchen. we judge new music together and take food critique very seriously. we watch love is blind before we fall asleep and agree that if they had a queer season, it would be bloody but also make for excellent tv. of fucking course queer people would know someone for only 2 weeks and agree to get married. what are you saying.

at a bar with friends, a man puts his hand on my wrist. got a boyfriend? and yes, i do have a boyfriend, she's amazing. i am texting her while i wander around a gas station named after geese. i am visiting a swing state for a wedding. in the candy aisle i overhear: she's actually like a lesbian it's disgusting. two teenage girls with packaged sandwiches in their hands, giggling. no literally, like. i'm not, like. okay with her being there while we're all, like, naked and changing.

my girlfriend and i tailgate, drink gin and cider out of cups. from the frat group beside us, a man corrects himself with one of his friends: bro, i mean, nonbinary entity, and it makes everyone around him laugh, myself included. he razzes his friend the same way i would have killed for at 19 years old - like nothing happened, he continues: you apply sunscreen like an alien. he does a little sassy (and fairly accurate) dance interpretation of the motion. his friend is laughing so hard they're crying.

i am lucky, i live in a safe neighborhood in a safe state. my masc passenger princess comes up from DC. i drive her for an hour to where all the leaves are a violent arrangement of color. we walk along the trails, letting autumn into our blood. in this part of the state, there's a lot of pickup trucks and trump signs. when we chastely kiss before getting into the car, i accidentally make eye contact with a woman holding her child's wrist. she looks disgusted. she looks fucking pissed.

two hours later my girl and i are eating dinner on a patio, soaking in the last warmth of new england sun before the chill of winter sets in. we are giggling and trying to talk through plastic vampire teeth. at another table, i see a young woman sit up straighter. i watch her watch us. she blushes and takes her partner's hand from across the table. shy, like the taste of evening has just become something deeper.

it's worth it for this moment, i think. my lover is still humming the same song she's been singing for four days straight and i don't want to kill her for it. her guitar is beside my bed. her toothbrush is in my bathroom. in a few moments i will make us lunch. we are lucky enough to have found each other. it is lucky enough to be in love.

[beebfreeb]

[daftmooncretin]

spock’s room decor is actually fucking bonkers. The weapons??? the big red velvet curtain??? like ok phantom of the opera go crazy.

for reference jim’s room has some photos and a plant so we can surmise this is uniquely a spock being a dramatic weirdo thing

[calicorobin]

beanbag chair psychology